#it's not even on purpose it's just cruel
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Twitter still deactivates accounts after thirty days of inactivity, right? Which means that the accounts of Palestinians killed in the bombing are going to be deleted en masse. First they're wiped from existence and then thirty days later their digital ghosts are wiped as well.
#i'm thinking of the woman who had a birthday for her five year old daughter#and then a few days later she and her other daughter were killed by an israeli bomb#and in a few weeks all her tweets will be erased#it's not even on purpose it's just cruel
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I couldnt finish. Got too sad.
#Disco elysium#So at first i didnt have an idea for an end panel that was kinda cheesey looking and so i was just going to leave it#But then i was like what even is this? Is it a declaration of despair? Is it some kind of masturbation? Is it fake doom tourism?#So i wasnt going to post it. It just felt cruel and inappropriate#But then i was like if even a fictional bombing serves a purpose at all its to radicalize the youth#Thats annette at the end btw. Besides the lorry drivers shes probably the only one not there at the time#Its a declaration of despair btw#Im so sad#Oh fuck i forgot to tag#Hanging#Death#Flashbacks
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[1]
Chapitre 221 - Remaining Laws of Nature
I’m fully in love with the bottom panels - how the Syaorans and Sakuras are transposed over each other. Especially when it’s a glimpse of horrified empathy over the suffering that other versions of themselves have gone through - on top of all the suffering that they themselves have already gone through.
It feels like such an emotional win that Yuuko says that’s enough. There won’t be any more suffering for them. They’ve all gone through so much that they don’t need any more - more won’t achieve anything. It’s very nice that the suffering-wish-cost-balance-maths also agrees on this front.
On a different meta level it’s so fascinating that Clamp wrote it this way. It's another moment where you can really see the way their storytelling changed over the years, especially when you compare this moment to something like RG Veda or X/1999, where there is rampant suffering in endlessly horrible ways. Here in Tsubasa Clamp establish a limit - they have Yuuko directly address Syaoran and Sakura and tell them that they’ve gone through enough and they deserve to just live now. It’s a huge shift in emotional focus, in a similar way to how Fai and Kurogane both survived Seresu - another arc that would have ended differently had it been an earlier CLAMP work rather than a later one.
I just really enjoy their changing priorities over time and how here in their most climactic work the note they keep going back to is, “Actually, that’s enough suffering. You have earned peace.”
#Especially in a world where suffering can be a Price#You can do suffering On Purpose to pay for things#Whereas in other works it was at times needless or pointless or cruel#Here it has a REASON or a CAUSE#And even with that incentive they’re like hey#You’re reaching your suffering limit we’re closing this down#Liveblogging the reservoir chronicle#Tsubasa#Vol 221#Sakura#Not!Sakura#Syaoran#Lava Lamp Guy#Yuuko Ichihara#There’s just something about the limits of suffering#How you can only go through so much#Before the universe itself is like hey stop that#Maybe dial it back a bit
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idk it's such a very small thing but "maybe you killed her with renju." "don't be ridiculous!" is very cool very epic i think. credit to both voice actors bc i believe that, their whole past and future entanglements aside, hitomi just fucking despised date for a second there to be honest
#like typed out in plain text its there but its kind of whatever its an interrogation sequence but when ur there everything really sells it#date has a level of empathy that allows him to be very sensitive and kind and intuit what people need from him emotionally.#naturally. on the other hand it gives him an ability to be uniquely aggressive and cruel. sometimes he's just nasty and awful.#similar vibes to him getting up and circling 'iris' like a vulture to intimidate her in that sequence when he's not getting what he wants#Woof creeps me out#im just delighted at hitomi snapping back at him spit in that mans face#im gonna Get You#aitsf#ai the somnium files#aitsf spoilers#hitomi sagan#kaname date#part of the duality with aiba (in ai1 anyway) is she can be inadvertently unkind due to inherent gaps in her logic and reliance on data#date is very good at empathising and guessing at vibes reading cues without even thinking to do it. but he's cruel on purpose
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Used to really hate when people would tell me my grief was part of love. All those quotes felt like a smack in the face saying it’s meant to be, and how could something so senseless find poetry?
#felt like accepting grief as love was saying it was something that had to happen#that should’ve happened#and any kind of acceptance was an approval#when I couldn’t protect him in life I had to protect him in death#and this assumption that there was a purpose for this depravity was cruel#now it’s less of a visceral reaction and I understand the sentiment#even if it doesn’t sit calmly in me#I’d like to just love#really I’d like him to have lived#I suppose it all comes down to the erasure of his humanity#all those quotes seemed to place him secondary to his death#I don’t want him to play a character in my story when he had his own I will never truly know and he never got to finish#grief
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some of you should not speak on dennis until you've rewatched sunny in full instead of just the macden-centric eps.
#literally not even a matter of like. different interpretations it's just some of y'all forget literal canon events that disprove shit#i get schooled by people abt den too i have my weaknesses w writing him#but like oh my god#some of y'all would be better off if you looked at him outside of a macden context#he's not evil incarnate#he's fucked up and he does awful shit#but that is a little boy wearing an adult face#to just make him evil for no reason completely removes any interesting bits of him.#one of the keys to sunny's writing is that#rcg always makes sure that motivation is understandable *in that character's eyes*#dennis has a very specific purpose for everything he does#he isn't just cruel for no fucking reason#he's 'brutally honest' because he thinks its his duty to break the news#he's absolutely entitled and arrogant and misogynistic#but he doesn't set out to be Mean just for the sake of it#den thinks he is doing good. he thinks he's in the right. its not him it's everyone else.#he's doing you a favour by saying you're ugly (and propping up his own decimated self esteem)#that being said he's also not innocent pookie either#but i would say its like. in a lot of ways he IS oblivious to the reality of what hes saying/doing#part of that is his privilege as a white man who grew up being supported by and continues to be supported by his parent's wealth#but the gang enables the shit he does just as frank financially enables him#they are so insular it's like impossible to break out of the gang and interact with normal people#because if they don't get it then dennis is going straight back to the gang to feel validated and to hell w everyone else#on some level he knows shit is unacceptable but he's never learned Why and never will because theres no reason to#like when mac is completely fucking shocked by den talking abt the implication dennis CANNOT let that go unchecked#he needs mac to understand him because he's realizing that it's *actually* fucked up. bc even mac thinks so.#and when dee calls what happened with klinsky Rape everything IMMEDIATELY crumbles for him#dennis is introspective but he will justify shit and compartmentalize until his friends challenge it#he looks to media; tv and movies where the protagonist gets away with shit because its schlock fiction#and dennis DOES see himself as a protagonist. it's all justifiable bc he's the good guy.
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I just wish people online would stop giving work advice and ruthlessly criticising professional and private lives of actors they don’t know in person. Just that.
#idk I’m fed up#it’s like you’ve no idea what Luke is doing or what he wants to do#you don’t know his current state of mind and plans#then why are you lashing him online with no purpose than to criticise and ridicule#i wouldn’t want strangers calling me a loser bc I’ve no projects lined up#(that we know of might I add)#it’s just tiring#I’d rather hype up and admire from a distance than be cruel for no reason#even on here#but maybe that’s just me#luke newton#newts I will always love you
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The concept of queerbaiting annoys me. I was told that it refers to a work of fiction pretending to cater to a queer audience but then pulling back from it to avoid alienating homophobes, which is an incredibly specific thing. But a lot of people seem to think that it instead means "any time there's any gay subtex, metaphor, or ambiguity" or "whenever something from 1995-2012 was being a normal amount of homophobic for the era."
#I've secondhand seen the way Sherlock...was.#And yeah that's very pointedly cruel to the audience.#But not everything is that aware of its following to point by point mock them for half an hour.#And I think people forget that for a period there was a unique combination of awareness of gay people and homophobia bad#and a severe need to avoid being perceived as gay (and sometimes homophobic) at the same time#while it was ALSO very acceptable to treat the existence of gay people and homophobia or discomfort with both as a joke#so that whole wink wink nudge nudge dance was a huge thing in some of the 90s and earlier 2000s#and sometimes by doing that people accidentally made it seem even more fucking gay.#Or on purpose. People also forget that yeah gay people could exist as a joke but they couldn't be casual protags or w/e.#It wasn't really done like that.#I think what it's really proof of is that the 90s/early 2000s is long enough ago that people have become illiterate to the cultural cues.#When comedians complain 'you cant make jokes anymore' sometimes this is the exact thing they're referring to.#Gay people being on TV or in books isn't some funny joke you make anymore. Just being gay or seen as gay isn't the punchline it used to be.#People are shitty about it still but it's in a different way now. Being gay isn't as much the big embarrassment it used to be.#Gay tv shows and books are a whole market now. And stuff like Sherlock or supernatural were made right in the middle of that shift.#It's the only way you could position a strategy like this. I don't know if that cultural moment really exists anymore.#Audience backlash is also more massive and in real time.#Now instead of mockery at the idea of idk Dr house md being gay conservatives would see it as a 'culture war' thing.#And non conservatives are more vocal and more liable to criticize. TV shows are seen as keepers of culture in ways they weren't before.#I don't know how to describe it exactly. I'm not an expert and I know I'm missing some pieces or things I wanted to point out.#But yeah I just think people kind of. Forgot how people treated gayness as some kind of cootie disease you had to say#You didn't have really hard all the time. People are still sort of like that but idk the language changed.#A lot of talk about homophobia and queerness is very pseudo-academic now. The distancing happens with different signifiers.#But. Yeah.#☠️#I also think queerbaiting requires a specific kind of intent as a marketing strategy.#Instead of the more likely 'well we have an unintended gay following now so I guess we can throw in some fanservice#the network would literally never allow us to do anything with it even if we wanted to though.'
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People like this have made me terrified that I am mischaracterizing my favorite character by playing into his strengths and emphasizing them so much... That I'm making things "too anime", "too over-the-top", and by doing that straying away from the groundedness that made the character compelling in the first place... But I think it's better to be a fan who loves someone so much they're willing to step into goofy over-the-top showcases of strength and morals out of love than being a fake fan who only ever rags on what they proclaim is so dear to them. I dunno. I don't think I'm wrong in saying that. I'm hella insecure when it comes to my own writing, especially with this guy because I want to do him as much justice as I possibly can as a writer. But I have to convince myself that it's not too much.
#logs#it doesn't help that i've been exposed to a lot of bad writing and cynical critique in general‚ so i'm even more fearful...#but i think the cure for that is to just... read more‚ and read with an honest heart#i don't know... i feel like i have a lot of growth to do as a person‚ as a reader and writer before i can execute this to the level where it#can truly be considered a masterpiece. grounded‚ yet not so. over-the-top in every way while also providing meaningful critique and#commentary on the nature of humanity. gutwrenching dialogue packed neatly with the most insane displays of asskicking. commentary on how war#is cruel and bad and only sows misery contrasted with the coolest battle scenes you have ever seen. these are the essence of the things i#love‚ and i want to be able to channel that through my own writing as well. it's the only way to do justice to the source material‚ the only#way to truly pay a tribute to the things that i love.#now that i am free‚ i can finally become more cultured... read more books‚ watch more films‚ inhale old mecha anime... it's what i've always#dreamed of doing#i just need to undo the mental shackles of ''i cannot do this right now''... i can. i finally can. i just need to let my mind catch up to#that. give it a little push along the way#once that's done... the journey begins.#i anguish a lot over the fact that my writing is locked in a tomb for the next decade... but sometimes‚ like now‚ i think‚ hey‚ maybe that#isn't so bad. imagine how many movies you can watch in those ten years... good movies‚ bad ones‚ exceptional ones... i'll have grown so much#as a writer by that point in time because i'll have learned the ''how'' part of what i want to write. i have the ''what'' already‚ and a#general idea of ''how''‚ but... ten years from now‚ i'll be able to write everything in a way that truly makes my eyes shine#a rare moment of me being hopeful for the future... i cherish it as those don't last very long in my life. i more often tend to despair#(cursed be the chemical disbalance!)#but yeah. there is a lot to look forward to despite the hardships. sure it would've been nice to just... have it all here‚ but... that's not#the world i live in. and maybe this one isn't so bad‚ either.#i have my box of scraps. now i just need to make it out of the cave.#the deadliest type of man is one with motivation and a purpose. right?
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you ever just. become overwhelmed by a sudden out-of-nowhere wave of tenderness and affection and longing for reconnection directed towards someone to whom you no longer speak for Very Good Reasons
#‘out of nowhere’ she says like she hasn’t been doing a lot of reading/thinking recently about various tragic messy breakups#and the later regrets of the parties involved#anyway. tell me not to text her#it’s been over two years since the last time we talked… absolutely no reason to break that streak now. lord give me strength#she was really fucking mean to me! like objectively intentionally unwarrantedly cruel! it ruined an entire year of my life#and fundamentally changed me as a person on a deep level! there’s a lot of things i used to like about myself that i don’t think i’m ever#going to get back#and yet every once in a while we have to do the whole ‘maybe i could make things right’ song and dance 😔#the thing is most of the time i’m not even really angry with her anymore like enough time has passed since all the shit went down that#really i just sort of look at her behavior and feel sad. both because of the impact on me but also because of the ‘that’s really how you#felt you needed to act towards someone who cared about you? you couldn’t have just expressed your feelings in an honest and productive way#instead of just lashing out in the cruelest possible way and ruining the entire relationship beyond hope of repair?’#and i feel bad and sorry that it went that way and honestly i kind of pity her and hope she’s gotten some of her shit worked out#so i’m not like. actively pissed off at her anymore. but also i can’t think about her without thinking about the worst year of my life so 🙃#i don’t actually feel that trying to reopen that door would be very healthy for me at least#we did try a Reconciliation of sorts a couple of months after the initial falling-out and while it was kind of helpful for me in that she#like. apologized lmao. and affirmed that i wasn’t crazy and she did in fact On Purpose say the most hurtful things she possibly could have#said to me given the information she had at her disposal. and that i really had not done anything to her that could warrant that. etc.#it also left a sour enough taste in my mouth that i just don’t see a future where the two of us spending time together is enjoyable for me#and yet… the regret will always live inside me i think. maybe if i were a stronger person…#caseyposting
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im not gonna lie this year has truly beat my ass so far but like those spiky meat hammers it did make me softer to be honest
#we can tb whether it’s necessary to struggle to grow. I don’t think anything that’s happened this yr has been necessarily unjust or cruel#w/o purpose if that makes sense#like I’ve been treated not so well by ppl I really care/d about (still have complicated feeling ab that) but I’ve learned from it at least#even when I try to be bitter it doesn’t stick or last#I do just want to be nicer. it has more purpose for me at least. like knowing if the ppl that disappointed me couldn’t be what I needed#I know that I can be that person for others and myself#which has been my way of dealing I think. reclaiming something#text
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y'know, i keep making a habit of swinging my bat at hornets nests, but i have to say i'm getting so, so tired of people complaining about shows not making perfect sense when they aren't even close to done. we're four episodes into this season of doctor who. we're four episodes into this season of bridgerton. and yet in both fandoms i keep seeing people whine that such and such didn't make sense or it wasn't explained all the way and by god you guys i think maybe explanations might come later in the season. this is something most viewers will recognize as being called a 'plot.'
#like maybe a tiny bit of media literacy... might save you#and if you think i'm being mean like. its okay if you don't get it at first. it's okay if you don't understand the themes. but maybe#instead of stamping your feet and saying this makes no sense and i hate what they're doing and and and#maybe you could try listening to other people's interpretations of things and you'll find that what the show is trying to tell you becomes#more clear! would you look at that. wild how that happens#like im sorry you're entitled to your opinions but calling things bad writing just because you don't quite get it or it doesn't resonate#with you personally... i don't think you should just say this was shitty and worthless#the examples im using are because both resonate with me btw. 73 yards was existential horror it was hill house and bly manor#(im going to write about this in another post btw bc it compels me so)#it was about the way fear of abandonment can haunt you how mental illness can haunt you how you feel like you can drive people away#just by being yourself (the Woman was Herself what caused ruby to be abandoned was Her it's about her feeling as though she was the cause#of everyone who left her even as a baby even the people who loved her most could decide to not love her at the drop of a hat)#colin bridgerton is masking and faking a personality because it has been proven that time and time again#being Himself is Wrong that he annoys people he makes himself into what people expect of him because he's tired of being abandoned too#his family ignores and does not reply to his letters this season PEN stopped replying to his letters#his brother was cruel to him for being a romantic his friends LAUGHED AT HIM for saying sex is meaningful to him and don't they feel lonely#his Fake Rake persona makes viewers cringe because! its!! fake!!! he's faking it! HE GETS CALLED OUT ON IT TWICE IN EP ONE#if you don't understand he's faking it then that's on you at that point! i don't know! maybe take a minute to sit in the discomfort and ask#why did this show make me react this way and do you think maybe it was on purpose#''73 yards was confusing'' do you think confusion may be one of the ways ruby feels about her abandonment?#there is a theme in all of her episodes so far is it ''badly written'' unclear to you or do you just refuse to think critically about it#txtly#and im sorry for tagging this its just for my blog i kinda wish they still didnt show up in tags if i tag them all the way at the bottom#[old lady ruby voice] ''i used to be able to tag things just for myself once upon a time''#bridgerton#bridgerton spoilers#doctor who#doctor who spoilers
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The Flowerheart!
(purposely didn't colour in Feli's tie and Hal's glove, it's like they're subtly trying to match :3 while also seemingly missing a piece of one another). Honestly though, in regards to Hal's sexuality, he's like that one tweet: "I'm probably nonbinary but I have a job so idrc bout that rn." He's definitely queer, but he's too busy with getting in danger his job to even bother with that so he just gets the queer label!
Neither of them confessing orz... They love each other so much yet neither of them are confessing... Hal being overprotective of Feli but in a way where it isn't even all that known by anyone but Feli and her the people really close to them. Hal doing his job is half-wanting to keep their city safe and half-wanting to keep Feli from any harm. He aint letting anyone hurt her that's for sure.
Relationship chart is made by @bengallemon !
#ariart#ariaoc#taking my weekly or so dosage of drawing my own ocs to get used to drawing em so i can draw em easily without the Demons#aka the nagging voice at the back of my head shouting at the fact that they arent as perfect as i see em in my head. only with my ocs smh#hal being a gift giver in the sense of ''i dont really need these so you can have them'' even tho he really purposely got those for feli#and feli doing acts of service in the sense of ''its part of my job to do this so just stay put'' even tho she wont do that for anyone else#ngl doing this made me sad cuz am made even more aware just how badly i set these two up. like they love each other sooo much#but cant even show it freely at all! they always gotta give out excuses to make it seem like it isnt purposely directed at the other#and not even in a tsundere way! cuz if it was up to them theyd be so publicly open bout their love for one another but its just#that the very world theyre living in is just so harsh that they both know it. hal cant show any weakness and he doesnt wanna#endanger feli and feli knows that too! she doesnt wanna endanger hal any more than hes alrdy constantly endangering himself#so the both of em just... puts the other within arms reach. even farther than that too! AND ITS SO SAD!#its like romeo and juliet but instead of opposing family conflicts its the entire world being the biggest danger there is#so the most selfish act feli and hal can do is keep their love for one another trapped within their own hearts#with only the silence between them their only means of communicating their ''i love yous'' cuz the world is too cruel
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okay i’m not skilled enough to do it myself but i NEEEED someone to make an angsty bkdk post-431 edit to closer by hippo campus
like….the kacchan yearning realizing izuku has grown up and out of their dream while he’s spent the last eight years waiting for him and working hard to make it all possible…..
but his offer to join his agency so easily dismissed, as if it was an obvious conclusion, making him realize those days are over. glad that izuku is happy in his new normal but having to come to terms with the death of his own dream
seeking out the old banter but izuku not following through, missing the way it was knowing it isn’t that way anymore now that they’re getting older and changing
having to watch izuku walk away, thoughts so far from where katsuki still is, because izuku’s passing milestone was katsuki’s end goal…
yeah. i need it NOW.
#mha#bnha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#bakugou katsuki#midoriya izuku#katsuki bakugou#izuku midoriya#bkdk angst#mha bkdk#mha manga spoilers#mha 431#bkdk#bnha bkdk#bnha manga spoilers#unrequited bkdk#unrequited love#ahahahaha it hurts#the ships not even the hurtful part tbh it’s just the rejection of their dream#and i understand the purpose of showing izuku has matured while katsuki has remained childlike#but the way it’s done feels cruel#a story based around hope shouldn’t put one of the main characters in such a cynical ending#kacchan sad#so i’m sad too#mha edit#bnha edit
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i just read a TERRIBLE sakura slander i have to actually sit down oh my god
#did we....... read the same manga???????#the way people said s.akura mistreat nrt and ino and thats smth they have in common#WHAT#maybe thats smth that was perpetuated further with anime additions but ?????#as solely manga reader i cannot fucking remember one time sakura was ever purposely cruel#or even being petty about her feelings#maybe when she was 12 years old before shit went down??????? WHICH??? UMMMM????#HELLO?????? SHE WAS A CHILD ????????#everything ABOUT what she's doing after shes 12 and ssk defected and how shes responding was a DIRECT response to the circumstances#she was enduring#i cant remember ONE time she was EVER mean to any of her comrades#she was always so overly caring. so fucking READY to help them#my best example was how she was with sai. like my girl PUNCHED him when he badmouthed ssk#and still she was also the FIRST to genuinely ask sai abt his questions and hobby etc#shes both loyal AND curious / open enough to new friendships and bonds#i try not to divulge so much into the fanon lens of sakura#but if u think she's just this one-dimensional petty and jealous bitch to satisfy ur own narration of an event ...... IJBOL#take care of urself fr cause idk how it is at ur side but where i am? i'm fine and replenished#and sakura is still much more than the girl who couldn't succeed her teammates.#gen: out of character.
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the nero and airi connection is so important it's not just bcs theyre my faves
#sylhea talks maydare#i swear i made a post abt this somewhere but rn im remembering why them meeting and talking was may fav chapter it's so so important#like look theyre both- in a way- 'taken in' by kanon. kanon chose airi to be the saviour while kanon saved nero bcs he's essential#airi got kanon's 'hero' while nero got kanon's 'king'. one of them feared kanon while the other admires him#and yet kanon is their saviour. he took them away from a world that is cruel to them. yet airi and nero have different circumstances#oh my god wait there's more similarities than i thought#both of them were taken just after their important people had died and in a vulnerable state#airi back thwn had a childish (not meant to be /neg) mind while nero in the past was just a child#both are given a responsibility and both accepted them in different ways. while airi was in the delusion she's the 'protagonist' of maydare#nero understood what his purpose and what he's supposed to do. but also both of them wanted something they desire. they wanted 'peace'.#both of them wanted to be in a world where they can live freely. airi wanted to live the most of her delusions while nero wanted to live#the most of his life as a normal student. different but to its core they only wanted peace and be themselves freely.#and in the end both of them understood that they have to act their role in order to achieve that peace in this worl. they know they had to#face forward and fight.#IT'S THIS LONG AND IM NOT EVEN GETTING INTO WHAT MADE ME START THIS 😭 atp their parallels is the main focus here#so all of those and there's more. makia. their connection to makia.#nero is a friend of makia while airi is a friend of kazuha. and the people who knew about makia's past.#i'm guessing nero only knew makia's past life as the scarlet witch and dont know about her other past life#while airi only knew about makia's past as kazuha and didn't know about her being a reincarnation of scarlet witch#nero talking to airi about makia was also very important bcs yes makia already slapped airi into reality and makia was able to do it#bcs not only is she born and raised in maydare she also have memories of the other world. nero who is PURELY from this world and donxt know#about the other world helped airi accept that this IS an actual world. makia ACTUALLY lived in this world and she learned that from nero.#lmao i know that wasnt the intention bcs the intention was nero saying all that so there's proof makia really is the reincarnation of makia#but i'm already this far bro nero who's purely from maydare that came to know of the other world from someone else#and airi who is purely from the other world and isekai'd by someone else to maydare#it's so fascinating#god when this chapter comes to manga im hoping ppl dont immediately ship them#bcs to be honest i dont think airi is interested in men at all and nero is interested in romance in general#plus nero is 16 y/o while airi is 20 y/o so there's that LMAO#it's so insane to me how much damage airi actually had her experiences was actually REALLY traumatic
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