#it's my First Playthrough Disease again

[invinciblerodent]

I take the thoughts and SQUASH them back down

You STAY right the fuck where you CAME from

[shmowderslut]

I recently started a "im going to read EVERYTHING" bachelor playthrough, and im surpriced i havent seen anyone talk about the many-legged fugitive side quest. Im sick and feel like my brain is filled with rats, so here's my unorganized and unholy feelings about it.

MINOR MECHANIC SPOILERS BELOW!! PLOT SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

First of all the house you need to go in is *not* easy to find, it is not the nearest house to the staircase (also theres two of them!) and definetly isnt visible from the stillwater. I have to confess, i needed to look it up online, and even the guide had misplaced the marker! As always, the frustration fuels me, and makes my love this game even more. And this is day 1! Its a nightmare and i love it. If youre stuck here, its okay, it seems like so many people were too.

Plot and character spoilers under the cut!

Okay now into the juicy stuff. Technically not about the quest yet, but we're getting there.

You get the quest talking to Lara Ravel, after learning about her from talking to Yulia in the main mission. A thing i dont think is mentioned a lot is that Yulia dislikes Lara Ravel. Now Yulia being a queer woman in stem (i will not accept criticism on this) She raves about all the other women like theire goddesses (they are) but she sees Lara as ungenuine and almost sad.

"She pities everyone she comes across, for she knows they will all die just like her dearly departed. She sees a corpse in everyone she looks upon"

And maybe i havent been paying attention, but this is very different from how Lara is usually portrayed, as a literal angel and a philanthropist. She always stood out to me as a surprisingly simple and good character is pathologic, so i was exactic to find out this detail of hers. Also the relationship says a lot about Yulia and her no-nonsense attitude, that she values honesty over good deeds.

Then we finally get to the quest in itself, where Lara tells you the children have brought an old dangerous game back. They used to play doctor using a dangerous mix of medicine and pretend healed eachother. She asks you to find a secret stash these kids hid and destroy all the shmowders (again, i went a lil insane trying to find the house). Unfortunately the bachelor is just too late, again, and the stash has been distributed among the children.

Theres 2 dogheads you can talk to, one of them tells you more about shmowders. That they doent believe in shmowders and its the little kids who are playing epidemic with deadly conjuctures. They blame Capella for distributing them, and all the kids should just go to the polyhedron to stay safe.

The second doghead tells you that yes, the shmowders do work and they came in use the last outbreak. That the kids were safe in the polyhedron, but some of them wandered out and made shmowders. Shmowders that were stored in this stash, but have now disappeared. Also as a fun fact, he tells you the spesific people who made the shmowders. Now i dont recognize these, but if you do please tell me.

"The original ones were made by Catchfly, but they were no good; the disease would pass, but the person would pass away along with it. But then Beaker's brothers made some nice ones. Crowfoot's weren't too shabby, and neither were Flanky's..."

I just think its neat to have an in universe reason the pumpkin girl sometimes carries a shmowder. Also this plays into what i think is the most prevalent pathologic theme, two impossible truths existing at the same time. The shmowders are a live saving medicine AND poison. Its childrens imagination AND real. You get the jist, my head hurts and im going to sleep

Also if you read this far, thank you?!? I am in no state to check this for clarity, but im pretty rambly (battling to not write a fanfic about this quest) and this is not my native language

[sydmarch]

@aaaaaaaaaatlas your tags on my last evrart analysis post got me thinking SO MUCH that rather than adding onto that thread i just had to make a whole new post to discuss my thoughts

because it's something i hadn't thought much about recently but you're SO RIGHT? my initial playthrough i like most others was afflicted with chronic "don't want to let kim down disease" so while i DID see evrart's storyline fully through because i was like "i don't want to miss out on things?? i need to get my gun???" i did so pretty reluctantly while not trusting him at all & that was pretty much because of kim. actually finishing the first playthrough & viewing evrart on a different lens because of that made me read him totally different on second and third go arounds though & having a few evrart posts circulating i've seen several tags along the lines of "didn't know any of this, i kept him at arms length because of kim/never finsihed any of his tasks bcus kim didn't like it" & it's SO interesting to dig into.

i think part of it has to do with how on a first playthrough where you aren't familiar with evrart & where his motivation really comes from, on top of him being clearly generally manipulative it's SO apparent that he's manipulating harry. & i feel like this is something that kim sees through just as much as us players. i think this manipulation shows through a lot in evrart's constant.. "favoritism" is the only way i can think to phrase it. towards harry. it comes out a lot in dialogue trees around the folder but several other times as well. a few moments that highlight what i mean wrt both manipulating harry specifically & evrart's general interactions with kim:

the impression i get around how evrart acts with kim is that he knows harry is more vulnerable due to his amnesia and thus an easier target, more useful to play the part he needs in his whole game. i mean he has this dead body on his hands, has already figured out how he's going to use this situation to his advantage to start a war with wild pines, and when the rcm officers come to investigate the murder one of them has literally no memories? what could be a better opportunity than that! it's also very telling how evrart immediately jumps to acting like he & harry are already such close friends, like to the point where on my first playthrough i was genuinely thinking for a bit "have we met this guy before the amnesia?". bearing that in mind it only makes sense that he would try to dismiss or ignore kim whenever possible to bring everything back around to harry. and again i feel kim very much picks up on this.

(kind of an aside but i thought it was interesting to note that if you search for all times "kitsuragi" is said by evrart, the only time he calls him "lieutenant kitsuragi" rather than "mr kitsuragi" (aside from the "you too lieutenant" above) seems to be when kim wasn't actually present:)

anyways on to flip side, how kim discusses evrart:

even before the initial meeting kim is already distrustful of him, which i mean makes sense considering evrart's reputation. kind of running out of brain juice to comment more insightfully on this side of things LOL so i'll just leave these here.

[funshinebf]

9 people you'd like to know better

tagged by @pso2 !! ty for the tag ^_^

a) three ships:

1) rn def vashwood. theyve given me diseases and disorders aplenty. genuinely thinking about them 24/7. its becoming a problem.

2) komahina. when i first watched a sdr2 playthrough in middle school i was like "wow i like these guys. kinda gay!" and ever since then i get like yearly Waves of thinking about them for a few weeks straight. and then they go back into the depths of my brain for another few months and the cycle starts again. shits insane

3) spideypool. bites them bites them bites them. nobody gets them except for me and my friends and a select few artists/writers

a1: bonus ships:

serirei... save me serirei. its about the two men. running a business. its just business

millymeryl of course. i would kill for them. milly thompson character of all time and oghhh meryl stryfe my beloved

b) first ever ship:

um... okay so. first ship i called a ship and like looked up content for online? john/dave from homestuck. also there is a very clear path from me discovering the ship of them leading to me discovering my transgenderness. thank you johndave for transing my gender sort of 👍

c) last song:

Your Love Is It Real? by doubleVee. grouhghh

d) last movie:

trigun badlands rumble. ive watched it like three times and will probably do so again at some point. and thats even less times than ive rewatched the two trigun serieses

e) currently reading:

idk about books ill be honest i dont read enough books... im sorry everyone ive failed you. BUT ive been rereading the trigun fic "come and see" by avoidingavoidance on ao3. very good fic, long as fuck and STILL GOING. would die for this fic

f) currently watching:

trigun. its always gonna be trigun for the next like year at least. i just sit around rewatching the two trigun serieses all the time. its been like this for like over 6 months straight now. lol

g) currently consuming:

i dontt know 😭 like eating? im not eating anything rn.. i had a slice of pie at my grandma's house earlier though and that shit was good

h) currently craving:

sushi... save me sushi.... save me....

9 people to tag: oh fuck this is the hard part. mods help help hep help. uhhhh @herrscher-of-yuri @kazumahashimoto @sungsuho @transpool @co27 @fecto @gigantomachylesbian @orcelito and anyone else who would want to do this?? (also no one feel pressured 2 do this, hope it was okay i tagged u!! ^_^)

i made an easily copy/paste-able version of this too btw im putting that under a cut lol

9 people you'd like to know better

tagged by:

a) three ships:

a1: bonus ships:

b) first ever ship:

c) last song:

d) last movie:

e) currently reading:

f) currently watching:

g) currently consuming:

h) currently craving:

9 people to tag:

okie bye ily 🫶

[ideas-on-paper]

Antonia's dialogue about the Gold Coin Tree

Thanks to a post by @lopposting, I learned about Antonia supposedly having some extra dialogue about the portrait you find in the hideout of the Black Rabbit Brotherhood, provided you talk to her first after obtaining it. I was curious to see this for myself, and since I'm currently on my NG+ run, I used the opportunity to check.

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to get Antonia to share any bonus dialogue about the painting, so if it's there, I don't know how to trigger it. (If anyone does, please leave me a hint!) I did, however, coincidentally stumble upon some dialogue Antonia has about the Gold Coin Tree and the Alchemists that I was completely unaware of until now.

To get this dialogue, you need to unlock the Gold Coin Tree (take the lift in the Malum District Town Hall) and then go to Antonia and speak to her. (During my first playthrough, I made the mistake of picking up the portrait in the town hall and turning around as soon as I saw the lift, since I thought it would take me to an unknown area. As a result, I got the conversation where Antonia gives you the key to Rosa Isabelle Street first and ended up missing this one.)

Upon talking to her, you'll get the following dialogue:

Now, this dialogue is very interesting for a variety of reasons, especially since it might support certain lore theories I've seen around. I'll put the more detailed discussion under the cut, since it goes into spoiler territory.

[Spoilers ahead!]

So, the first thing we learn is that Antonia was aware that the tree was there all along - makes sense, considering she also knew about the hidden underground tunnels. In fact, I'd be more surprised if she didn't know it was there, since Antonia knows more about the hotel's secrets than anyone else.

More interestingly, Antonia mentions there was infighting among the Alchemists:

"The Krat Disaster caused the Alchemists to fight amongst themselves. Many people died or went missing. That's the real tragedy of the Rose Estate."

This dialogue has led to the theory that the mysterious Rose Estate incident was a coup instigated by Simon Manus to dispose of Valentinus as a leader, and having seen the full dialogue for the first time now, I feel inclined to agree. Also, I'm not sure, but since Antonia says the "Krat Disaster" is what caused the Alchemists' internal conflict, does that mean the Puppet Frenzy and Petrification Disease outbreak already occurred before the Rose Estate incident?

Regarding the Gold Coin Tree itself, Antonia says it reacts to Ergo somehow - I guess that's why P can pick fruits from it? (But if you need large amounts of Ergo to harvest the fruits, how was the Black Rabbit Brotherhood able to steal them? Then again, they do mention the Gold Coin Fruits aren't easy to get in their notebook…)

From both Antonia and Sophia's accounts, it's obvious that the Alchemists wanted to do something with the Gold Coin Fruits - the question is just exactly what. Perhaps it has something to do with the Saintess of Mercy Statue. The notebook of Alidoro (presuming it was written by the real one) mentions the tree being "used on humans". Could that mean that the fruits can be used with the statue to revive dead people somehow? (I wrote some stuff about that here, and how Giangio/Paracelsus might fit into this.)

Either way, I get the feeling there's more to the lore of the Saintess Statue...

[8bitsupervillain]

Higurashi When They Cry Hou Ch. 7 Minagoroshi pt. 3

Genuine question here for readers, since I read further ahead than where these posts indicate do you want me to stop putting vague "guesses" or jokes about how I know about imminent forthcoming plot elements? Would you rather I just directly talk about how plot thing Z happens shortly, make my vague insinuations, or just stop mentioning it entirely? The other option is I just read, and when something cool/unpredicted happens post about that. (this question ripped from later on in the post because I felt it broke the flow somewhat.) Also, I don't know if anyone saw it earlier, but this is not the first part three.

Shortly after telling Hanyuu to shut it, Rika muses on how Keiichi being able to remember events from Onikakushi last chapter is a miracle. Using this as a motivational tool Rika decides to fight her fate more earnestly than she had done in the past. I haven't posted about it in the playthrough here yet, but this chapter so far is a lot more meta than previous chapters with its outright fourth wall breaks and remarks about the medium.

After this is a TIP section written from someone's grandfather explaining to the recipient of the TIP that their committing suicide because they can't handle how many days he might have left to live. Also that he feels like he's a humiliated man because he is unable to leave any of his achievements to the world. Basically that he's upset that he will be forgotten. He then beseeches the recipient to do better than him. To achieve something. It ends with the rather grandiose statement that the recipient must achieve godhood.

I don't really know who this TIP is explicitly written to, given some dialogue from later on in the chapter I certainly have my theories.

I always did kind of wonder what the deal with those little nurse hats were. You always see them in period dramas with hospitals, but some time around the nineties they seem to have just went away entirely. Maybe there was some sort of medical reason for them, but probably it's just some doctor way back in the day had a thing for women in hats. I was going to make a crack about doctors with hats, but the only ones who really wear any sort of head wear are surgeons.

I think Ryukishi07 has a thing for nurses. Every other version of Takano has a longer skirt. Not that I blame him, sometimes you gotta do things for you.

I know they'll say what it is later (to clarify they haven't identified the disease yet), but I do wonder what Satoko has. I sincerely doubt it'll be an actual disease, and it'll be something like anime mom disease, but I do wonder what it is. I believe I mentioned it in the past, but there's so much incidental dialogue that gets thrown around in these early parts of the chapter that gives off the impression that this will be the final chapter. Stuff like Irie talking about how he's going to find a cure for death, Rika's last ditch effort to fight fate, etc.

I like Hanyuu, she seems like a good kid, god child, thing. I find her pretty relatable with how she doesn't like to hang around Rika being a downer while talking to Irie. Honestly, how often do you find yourself not wanting to hang out with someone for a minute because they're just such a constant bummer to be around?

I know she's not a doctor, but I guess this goes to show the difference between medical doctors and psychologists huh? It probably doesn't say great things that the eleven year old kid looking at a Rorschach's interpretation is butterfly sex, but then again like Rika alludes to, whatever she saw it as during her time as an abuse victim is probably miles worse. I probably should've used psychiatrist there, but I think you get my point.

I knew it was bound to happen, but honestly I like the fact that we're finally learning more about Irie, and Takano. It makes them much more interesting than just being their relatively one note selves from previous chapters. Sure we knew that Takano is an occult fangirl weirdo, but it's also funny to learn about how she apparently has a big stuffed animal collection. It's kind of like learning about how when a game development company back in the nineties approached H.R. Giger about using his art in their game he answered the door wearing basically a dracula cape, but he kept giving the developers tea and cookies. Then afterwards he kept sending them birthday cards and new years cards with just fluffy adorable rabbits on em.

Or with Irie he's not just a lolicon maid fetishist he's actually pretty serious about his job. Of course I also like the fact that these two are getting a chance to be actual characters this time around, and not just they show up for one section and then immediately either leave the plot entirely or die. Or both.

[crystalelemental]

Finally got myself starting on Final Fantasy 9 properly, and have some general thoughts.

For clarity, I am through the first disk's content and got through most of the Treno stuff.

Kinda like FF8, my recollections of the first playthrough of FF9 all those years ago revolve around a single point: the party split. I dreaded this. I remember absolutely hating the split, because Zidane's party is left with exactly no healing at all, and you have to deal with Potion as your only means of healing. Which costs money. But money is tight in this game because you can't ever sell equipment, because all your equipment has unique skills and different equipment doesn't always pass those particular skills to every character so you kinda just need to keep everything. As such, I remember this segment being a nightmare.

I am pleased to announce, not as bad as remembered.

For one thing, magic...kinda sucks? Again? PS1 era did not like magic, huh? Vivi's T1 spells are functionally useless, but more than that, it's the issue of MP. It's so low that you only get a few casts in any given stretch of time, only to find in boss fights that Vivi contributes less than everyone else just stabbing a target. Garnet isn't exactly much better, given that her healing is only useful a couple of times anyway.

The main reason to miss Garnet, then, is honestly the exploration phases where you need occasional pop heals. Those sections were a little difficult to break into, and required some Mandragora farming for cash. Which...I've done a lot of, I'm not gonna front. I'm also dirt poor again. The streamers I've been watching keep joking about FF12 having no money, but man FF9 feels way worse than 12 ever did.

Anyway, boss fights are the big hangup I have. While the exploration phases are difficult at times, they're at least fast-paced and zones are easily understood just by looking, unlike the other PS1 era games. So I'm overall enjoying this more than the last two from gameplay, at least. The problem is bosses suck.

Here's an example: this morning, my wife took a break from her game to nap around 8:45. We go on a walk and lunch date on Saturdays, usually leaving around 10, so I figure hey, I've got about an hour. I book up the game to play, having just finished all the Chocobo Forest and Qu's Marsh stuff, and about to press to Gizamaluke Cave. I spend about three minutes getting over there, about 12 exploring the cave thoroughly, about 35 fighting the boss, and about 5 getting the next Blue Mage skill (I'm using a guide to indicate Blue Magic, given that Quina is mandatory for an indeterminate amount of time).

"What the hell kept you?" you may ask. "Surely the boss wasn't that hard." It wasn't. I won first try. "It shouldn't take that long, though?" It does. Because of Zidane. Zidane is the main character. He is also a thief. Which means they had to design a system that makes thieving important. Thus, equipment having all the unique skills and such. Bosses have equipment. It's unclear whether you can buy them later (so far everything can be, but how long it takes varies), but even with that, the economy is in shambles, and you likely don't want to spend the money for it. So you spend an ungodly amount of time trying to steal semi-rare equipment, with Zidane failing some 40+ actions in a row for no reason, as your party just sits around waiting for him to do his singular fucking job, draining your Potion stocks from like 90 to 30.

I will admit that to some degree, I may be overly concerned about the stealing mechanic. But I also am 100% certain there will be unique steals sooner or later. I'm kinda surprised they haven't already happened. And in a game where equipment matters so much not just for its own sake, but for learnable skills? Now I need to get everything. The brain disease compels me. The only one I let go was Beatrix, because I didn't feel like resetting after all those scenes just for her rare drop. Turns out it was a sword you can buy almost immediately, so apparently sometimes the game plays pranks.

I dunno. This feels very similar in structure to FF8. What's the functional difference between spending 30 turns drawing magic for everyone, or spending 30 turns stealing? Answer: in the former, your characters are all doing something, and "Draw heal spells" is usually an option. In the latter you just get the piss beat out of you while Zidane does fuckall for 30 of god's own minutes. And yeah, maybe like FF8 there are better ways of doing this, and I'm not really required to do all of this. But shit dude, without encyclopedic knowledge of the game, how am I supposed to know this isn't unique stuff? So the compulsion is reinforced.

I don't dislike the game, I just wish that stealing mechanics weren't always so terrible. I legitimately hate having to do stealing in Final Fantasy games, I feel like it's never good. There's always some stupid shit about rare steals and unique equipment and it drives me nuts. I suppose this game isn't too different in that regard. I just wish it wouldn't.

(also I am actively avoiding the minigame discussion. I hate catching frogs. I hate Chocobo Hot and Cold. Minigames in this era of Final Fantasy are intolerable.)

[vigilskeep]

honestly suprised you managed a friend varric with a red hawke, i just finished act 1 with my first ever red hawke and since i have chronic varric disease i bring him along everywhere and he hates my boy,, this is my first time playing without following an approval guide bc i'm trying to play more immersively and seeing the disapproval after every cutscene is hilarious cus most of the time varric isn't even outwardly antagonistic or offput he just rolls with it so i'm always like?? what'd i do??

i did use approval guides for the whole of keir's playthrough lmao. i also don't play red straight, keir's a fair bit blue as well and i occasionally let companions like varric and isabela bring out the tiny bit of purple in him because that's generally the effect they have on people and it feels natural especially once they've gotten to know each other

varric really doesn't naturally like red hawke lmao his reactions to red hawke are a lot less engaging and he takes far more issue than anyone else with hawke being aggressive to other people. so it did take a little longer and a little more effort to build that approval up than with most others. though still not nearly as long as say fenris; i definitely got varric up to full approval in the earlier half of act 2. again that's benefits of approval guides, i think i maybe cheated a little too much in keir's playthrough and lost out on some of the companion conflict there should've been. also i don't bring varric around that much idk why... i guess when choosing what rogue to bring i am just partial to isabela

keir really didn't naturally like what he first saw of varric either lmao but that doesn't completely turn me off liking friendship for them because i do think it's very funny if they both care abt this friendship a lot and totally misremember they initially couldn't stand each other. deep roads expedition trauma bonding

[highlifeboat]

I love walking sims that make you think, and no nothing about Nevermind. Please tell me more, (if you're willing)

OKAY SO

Nevermind is a walking sim where you play as a Neuro Scientist (I think they actually call you a Neuro Prober) that goes through the brains of 4 trauma patients (+ an IntroSim). It's actually designed to have biofeedback so it can register your heart rate and change based on how scared it thinks you are, but you don't need that to play/get the whole experience.

The basic run down is you go through these patients memories to help them remember the cause/root of their trauma and help them find peace with what happened. To do this you go through their mind and collect memories in the form of pictures. There's ten pictures for each patient, half of them are real and half are the equivalent of trauma blocking/false memories. In order to help the patients you have to put the real memories in order of events that lead to the traumatic event you're helping them remember. (After you finish a patient you can go through it again to find little hidden memories. They aren't important over all but they're still neat and will just give the patient some extra personality)

You never actually see these people, but they'll give you a little summary that's always kind of like "This is how my past was. I don't think you'll really help, but it's worth a shot right?" They're also all pretty unique. The first is a woman who witnessed her father's death, the second a war veteran, the third is an older woman, and the last is a trans woman. All with completely different traumas.

This game is also incredibly beautiful. The visuals and scenery are all amazing, and the mind-scapes are so creative and fit their respective patients so well.

HOWEVER (and this is important) I ALSO CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH THAT THIS GAME REQUIRES A HUGE TRIGGER WARNING. It does mention it at the start of the game with a big ass warning (that I will drop below), but I figure I would mention this because it's kind of really important for deciding if you want to watch/play it.

Because this game deals with various traumas that it visualizes in various ways, it won't be for everyone.

Nevermind contains various depictions of death (both human and one instance of animal death), suicide, PTSD/CPTSD, alzheimer disease, abuse, derealization/dissociation, blood, drug abuse, transphobia, and loud noises. A lot of which are graphic and will be disturbing to people and I understand is not for everyone. (There's one in particular, a War Vet, that's really fucking intense with gore specifically)

I will also stress it doesn't glorify these things, either. The entire point is to show how various types of trauma affect people and how it really screws with the brain.

I, personally, believe the game handles all the topics very well. But, y'know, if you're sensitive to any of that stuff you might not wanna play it. There's a lot of videos of the IntroSim,however, and DS Playthroughs has a playlist of all the Sims with No Commentary if you just wanna watch a playthrough. (Literally the only full walkthrough I can find of this game)

All in all, I think it's my favourite walking sim game and I highly recommend at least taking a look at the playthrough if you're interested in it.

[psystirene]

The blue Hunter and the pups she takes care of :)

From my first Hunter run which I am not fully done with. Though this scug would probably exist separately from canon Hunter as an OC so the story's not the same. I've been calling the pups Nightcat and Survivor for obvious reasons. Anyways some info below the cut <3

So this slug who I'll just call Blue for simplicity's sake, was the caretaker of Survivor and Nightcat, hoping to find a slugcat colony of some kind, or a proper family where they could live.

She found Survivor and Nightcat after her visit to Moon, as they were hiding away in one of the dens of her superstructure. The two had come to look for food, but had gotten scared off by a pack of scavs who were looking for Blue.

She takes the pups many places in her quest, until they eventually reach Outer Expanse. Blue finds herself unfit to live there, as she catches a disease which slowly weakens her. Survivor and Nightcat do the best they can to help her overcome this, but the illness ends up taking her, and the two pups are left to fend for themselves again.

They eventually find Gourmand's colony, where Nightcat is adopted by Gourmand and Survivor is adopted by Monk's parents. They continue to grow up together until Survivor and Monk's family decide to go on the trip where Surv falls into Outskirts.

Side note: Rotund World is one heck of a mod. For some reason I'm doing this run with it.

I should say as well that technically I restarted this run three times, trying different ways to get to LttM/FP fast. I ended up using the one where you go from Farm Arrays to Subterranean, then Shoreline. All that to say that, technically, both screenshots are from different playthroughs... Shhh.......

[howdomaddie]

nine eight people you would like to get to know better

ahhh thank you @elmelloill for the tag, i am so excited to have a chance to do a tag game again. hm, not unlike lev's sentiment, i feel like i know most of the people im gonna tag but i want to share in the fun :D you don't have to and if i didnt tag you but you still wanna do the thing then!!!!!! do it!!!!! (i couldnt think of 9 people im SORRY) @knightofkestrels @feelingwhimsy @whatnowllamapeople @jess-jessitiz @here-queer-jointpain-severe @sevennbees @imthepunchlord @kerrtesy

a lot more than three ships: UH hm. let me think

so technically (aside from catboy ot3) all ships are rotating in my brain at all times, and it kind of depends on what thing i've become re-obsessed with at any given moment. i am on a duo of fire emblem and ace attorney eras all over again, so chrobin (both robins), ike/soren and klapollo are all on the brain. also ryukita for persona 5 since we started replaying that one recently. also flynn/yuri from tales of vesperia bc they're a very fun dynamic i like chewing on. rowan/graha/estinien just. lurks at the back of my mind at all times klhgkjh

first ship ever: percy/annabeth from the pjo books, i think? thats the oldest i can remember, bc i got into the series in middle school. for other not-first ships, i think roughly around then i was also just dabbling in ds games of all kinds. i definitely read the pokemon special/pokemon adventures manga and shipped red/yellow, and then protag/keith in the second pokemon ranger game. i wrote....so much fanfiction back then...

last song: if we're being technical it's a lofi mix i have on for work (link to my work playlist here if you want it) but otherwise, it's been XIV/genshin/star rail OSTs and a mix of ok goodnight/casey lee williams the edge and fall out boy's so much for stardust album, though really it's the first two songs

last movie: UHHHHH i think the most recent indiana jones movie? my dad took me for my birthday last month, hehe. NO WAIT IT WAS BARBIE the barbie movie was good

currently reading: unfortunately i dont read books all that much any more, and mostly the same for fics. i guess this is the time to give me book recs?

currently watching: well, nothing really TV show wise, though i was hoping to maybe start a rewatch of the first few arcs of fairy tail. we'll see. i mostly watch youtube nowadays, and usually it's a combination of channels. playframe happens to be my favorite (nice and varied playthrough content, but also just a really nice husband/wife duo that plays things together and with their friends). i also enjoy studson studio since i want to do more diorama building and he's the one that got me interested in it :)

currently consuming: ough sweet tarts and a ginger ale technically speaking, im like a zombie at work today and hoping the sour and bubbly will keep me awake @_@ but i did have a nice yoghurt and croissant for breakfast (i promise i eat normal meals and i just happen to be snacking rn fldkjgh)

currently craving: the comfort of my bed bc i have an extremely terminal case of sleepy bitch disease

[gorematchala]

I have completed Star Ocean!!!!

So I only have one negative thing to say about First Departure R and its minor. To get it out of the way, this game has the same disease many RPGs have which is "bad final area and last boss" syndrome. I made the strongest sword I could possibly get for Roddick and half the enemies at the end, including the final boss, are healed if you hit them with it, I assume because they absorb dark element. I will be maining the Soul Eater next time

But there is currently a next time because I really liked the game! Its old and arcane and items are super important even though you'll never need even a fraction of whats available, and all of that PSP jank is so good, I love it. As a remake/remaster/port thing I really love the way the devs stayed true to the SNES game and the PSP game at the same time somehow. Its like the most respectful remaster ever

Besides just liking the game I've started a second playthrough because there are a lot of characters and I want to play with some of the ones I couldn't get before. Unfortunately it would take 3 playthroughs to use all of them and idk if I would go that far so soon after my first clear but the other reason I'm playing again is I understand the skill system now and I wasted so many points and so much EXP before that i basically just wanna see how broken overpowered I can get lol. I feel like theres an upper limit for sure cuz damage caps at 9999, but I wanna max out all skills for everyone and smith some fucked up armor and buy all the expensive items and stuff. Its got all the components of the kind of RPG I'm always looking for, even though just like with FF8 I wish it was just normal turn based combat. The spritework is really good though and it helps the fights be fun

I started the demo for second story and so far I really like the characters and the art and stuff but it kinda encapsulates a problem I have with sequels and modernizing things. The stagger system and all the battle stuff is fuckin awesome, I love it and its what drew me to the game in the first place, but the 3D environments look kinda crusty and the menus are all just blue and samey looking. The SO:FD menus let you change the background color and all the different tabs have colored icons next to them. And its nice cuz theres a lot of menus in that game. With Second Story its like you trade the PSP swag for convenience and sick battle systems. But I reallyyy like the PSP swag is the problem

[sluntch]

I have a weird take that I need to get out in the world somewhere and this appears to be the best place to do so

Everyone should have their first playthrough of a Souls game be either alone or, failing that, with someone to whom that game is the best in the series.

Let me explain.

--- Disclaimer: This is all just, like, my opinion, man ---

To start this post off, there are a few things I need to get out of the way. Chief among these is that my first Souls game was Dark Souls 2, so I'm a sicko who has absolutely NO nostalgia or overfondness for Dark Souls 1. As such, people who slob all over DS1's knob are total fucking weirdos to me, because I think the game, gameplay-wise, is the absolute worst of the entire series and the lore is, like, mid at best. To a less-important extent, I have neither fought nor beaten Artorias or played the DLC for DS1. To be quite honest, I don't think that matters very much but I know some mfers will be like "BUT HE'S THE BEST THING ABOUT THE WHOLE SERIES" to which I would rebut - then that sucks. One guy in one, fairly small (considering later releases), DLC being the best thing about a series is kinda bleak isn't it? Personally, I think that DS1 is held in such a high regard because it was the higher-profile Second of its Kind, a refined version of what was started in Demons' Souls. People nut over the interconnected world thing too, which is cool but has pretty poor implementation that makes getting anywhere and doing all the backtracking you have to do REALLY tedious. Least important is that I have not, and probably am not going to, ever played Demons' Souls. I just don't have interest in it and the gameplay is probably jankier that DS1 and I already barely have patience for that.

As a side note, Dark Souls 3, despite having what I believe to be some of the better gameplay and some of my favorite weapons, areas, music, and bosses in the series, is just the worst in that it's a fanservice game for DS1 fans and almost exclusively nothing else. Yes, they tacked some DS2 stuff in there as a pity drop for DS2 truthers but it seems to just kinda pretend that DS2 doesn't exist and is just so masturbatory that I almost can't stand it.

Glad to have these off my chest. If you're ready to discount everything I have to say from here on out based on that first paragraph, then godspeed. Continuing.

In looking to take my mind off of my current situation (see older posts for context regarding my cool disease), I decided to turn to comfort vidya games, namely playing through Elden Ring again, something I haven't done in quite a while. I'm remembering how much I love it and my playthrough, which is still going strong as of this writing, is super fun. I'm taking the game much slower than any previous playthrough I've done besides the first (this one is number 5) and am just enjoying being in the Lands Between, readily awaiting the DLC for the game that will likely come out in 2024. One of the things I've always done when I'm playing a game, specifically a game that I don't really need to pay attention to story-wise or sound-wise, I have videos or music or something on in the background. I'm sure many of you do this as well.

[QUICK SIDE NOTE: One of my more nostalgic sensory memories is when I used to do this in my room, during my high school years, playing Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 while watching episodes of Archer in the background. I can see the evening sun coming through my windows and it was such a warm and comfortable environment that I constantly yearn for it again, even though I know I'll probably never have another moment quite like that, carefree and cozy, just doing my thing. Eh. A guy can dream though, right? END QUICK SIDE NOTE]

What I've been having on in the background as of late are the Super Best Friends Play [insert Souls game here] compilations. These playthroughs, with the exception of Bloodborne (Pat and Woolie switching off controls on death, arguably the worst way to play a Souls game) and DS3 (Pat on the sticks and overleveling to the point of ruining the playthrough lol), are in the same format - Woolie, is on the sticks and Pat backseats, providing some context and guidance throughout. initially, for the DS2 playthrough, I was very excited because Woolie's first Souls game was the same as mine! Hey! This dude is playing it in the same order that I did! However, when I watched through it the first time, ALL Pat could do was shit on DS2 and say how much better DS1 was. In subsequent videos and playthroughs, it comes through VERY clearly and notably that this tainted Woolie's view of the entire series and greatly affected the way he interacted with it. On this watch, I formulated the above opinion.

The Souls games are so fucking good that they do NOT deserve to be ruined by someone shouting in your ear about how a different one did things better. Yes, I think DS1 is the worst of the series but even at that point, it's the worst of one of the best series of games of all time, which is still incredibly good. Obviously, the ideal way to play a Souls game is to go in completely blind and do it by yourself. But if you're playing with friends or in your Discord or something or someone is coming over to watch you play (if people still do that. GOD I hope they do), someone in the room should have that Souls game be their favorite. The game gets proper hype and no sole voice in the backseat gets to say some shit about how the fight with Artorias was better or "there's too many dudes in armor" or something about how it's "SO INNOVATIVE" that Gwyn's theme is sad piano plunks instead of epic boss music (which, to be fair, it is but shut up about it already. We get it). It's crazy to me how just one person's attitude like that can poison a perception of a game. For someone playing through them for the first time (people of whom I am EXTREMELY jealous), the initial impression is everything and every person should get to have the joy of playing through them unmarred by negativity about the game they are currently playing.

I don't know if this is anything and I don't think this argument is fully fleshed-out in this post or even really coherent. Just some dumb weird thoughts I wanted to put out there on my favorite game series.

[samsaraandbeyond]

OC Introduction: Bal

Art by Squiddy62 (NSFW)

The "Dark Urge" in question was whether or not he'd bite someone for no reason again.

Design

(Baldur's Gate 3 spoilers ahead!)

I had a second save going on right behind my first one, and what better option to pick than THE DARK URGE. It felt like I was playing an actual character with personal ties to the story because I was playing an actual character with personal ties to the story.

Knights are nice.

Still a white(ish) dragonborn.

Eventually, I got tired of jumping from save file to save file sooo I plugged in a second controller to make Tav for the Dark Urge run!

they're besties, your honor

SO, my Durge went about the same route as my Tav did regarding choices. Though where Tav usually got past problems with charisma and being a quirky lil shit, Durge killed everyone.

This wasn't exactly me roleplaying the character either. Since this save was behind my first one, the battles I had skipped with charisma were fought as Durge just because I never got to experience them.

Tav was a multi-classing Bard while my Durge was a Barbarian for pretty much the entire run. Playing a support during one run and switching to an angry dragon who had no problems running up to someone with an axe on the other really made both playthroughs feel unique.

goobers

Abilities / Traits

The shit I did as Durge...

Telekinesis / Telepathy

"Man, these tadpoles ain't shi-"

Wielding the power of his mind, Bal is able to affect and influence reality. Moving objects or people, reading the thoughts of other beings, influencing their decisions, and inflicting mental ailments are several ways he can use this technique.

"A power courses through you. Authority."

Beginner Support Mastery

Disgaea 7

Bal knows enough of the healing arts to tend to cuts and nasty bruises. He can also provide allies with temporary enhancements to their abilities.

"I lack Tav's delicate touch, but at the very least I can make this hurt less." - Bal

Expert Weapon Wielder

Link (Legend of Zelda)

Hand Bal any sort of weapon and you can bet he'll have its uses down within the next hour.

Axes, knives, great swords, regular swords, maces, flails, shields, sickles, hammers, his fists (yes, they count, I decked a bitch), name it, he'll beat someone over the head with it.

"I will make your death glorious." - Bal

Dragonborn's Blessing - Frost

Wendigo (The Haunted House/Shinbi Apartment)

Not the usual dragon element.

Bal's innate dragon traits grant him the ability to shower opponents with a breath of frost, chilling his foes before delivering a fatal blow. In addition, ice related spells receive a boost in power when cast by him, and he has additional resistance to the cold.

"The chill of death cannot be escaped!" - Bal

First Aid Specialist

Healing magic off the table? He can work with what he has.

Bal is educated in the ways of the organic body. He has knowledge of various diseases, poisons, their symptoms, knows the proper procedures for tending to a variety of injuries and conditions, and can improvise solutions should proper tools not be available.

"Don't...don't ask me why I know so many symptoms of poisoning..." - Bal

The Urge

An unexplainable, instinct-dominating sensation that takes hold at random, causing Bal to act on darker thoughts; even if they are fleeting.

In his previous life, this Urge would cause him to relish in the thoughts of harming others; eventually turning them into actions. In Samsara, this Urge is mostly tamed, satisfying itself with acts of petty selfishness and causing misfortune for others.

While Bal won't suddenly murder someone, that doesn't mean he lost his sheer enjoyment of the act.

"I-I'm sorry, Tav. I can't excuse it; I never can." - Bal

Personality

Bal is based on the choices I made during my BG3 playthrough so that means he may like killing people too much.

Snarking at others while ultimately doing the right thing (when the Urge wasn't taking control), if someone threatened his life, they died. That's it. He wasn't always killing because he needed to sate his bloodlust; but because it always felt so necessary.

He'll make violent, colorful threats that he hopes he doesn't have to follow up on, as if a battle ensues, he will do exactly that.

Because of this and despite his heroic intentions, he has a somewhat low opinion on himself.

But he's friendly all things considered!

"Whatever is about to happen, I'm sure I deserve it." - Bal

Backstory

Play Baldur's Gate 3.

"One day, I won't have to pick up a blade..." - Bal

[concrete-beach-party]

BG3 playthrough: Camp Drama Edition

Whatever happened since my last post about my playthrough. We're still in act 1.

My partners pc, Lae'zel and Shadowheart:

my partner started Shadowheart's romance, but Lae'zel wanted to taste him, so he's with both (for now)

Shadowheart hasn't noticed (so far)

Lae'zel and Shadowheart started fighting about the artefact though

Shadowheart kneeling above Lae'zel and holding a blade to her neck while saying "WHY ARE WE NOT NICE TO EACH OTHER" is hilarious

Shadowheart showed him her past and let me tell you, Baby Shadowheart is so, SO CUTE I'M DYING

I wanna add: I LOVE the fact that Wyll's just standing there, sipping his wine all the time, he's perfect

Me and Astarion:

We met Gandrel outside of Ethel's hut. Gandrel is now dead.

Side note: Lae'zel is constantly saying "I CRAVE BLOOOOOD" and when we decide to kill someone, she disapproves. Welp.

Astarion finally likes me! I'm so happy. Well, at least he calls me his favourite travel companion.

He's telling me more and more about his past and the more he says, the angrier I get. He had an absolutely horrible life.

He needs a hug.

I got the mirror scene and told him he's pretty, since I can't give him a hug (right now).

Other story bits:

Inside Auntie's lair, there's this dwarf that is turned to stone. Well, I had a potion for that in my inventory and thought "oooh let's help him!!"

He's succumbed to his deadly disease. Oops.

We tried to kill Auntie, but she escaped to fuck-knows-where. I wonder if we'll see her again later. Probably yes.

Mayrina was pretty mad at us for helping her

We found a wand that "resurrected" her dead husband Connor, she wasn't exactly happy with what she got.

She is now en route to Baldur's Gate with her zombie husband. That's totally normal, right? Right??

Anyways, we're now off to kill evil people in the underdark, which is probably the first time Astarion agrees on something I would have done either way.

(side note: my partner has now started sending me memes about getting Astarion's approval because I am so obsessed with this in our playthrough. Talk about supportive partners)

[zarvasace]

Okay so just in case you were worried, no, I did not forget to upload a chapter today, I was just busy, playing the world's coolest game, Twilight Imperium! (PAX MAGNIFICA BELLUM GLORIOSUM) Got up at 8 AM this morning, got to my friend's house at 9:20, set everything up, started at 11. Lunch break 1:30-2:30 PM. We finally finished at 11:30 PM. It is now 1:11 AM and I am going to bed rather than writing . That game took us 12.5 hours, and they were all perfectly glorious hours. (Gets a little grueling at the end, we didn't hurry the game on very well, but still glorious.)

Here's how the board ended up! Isn't it lovely. My pieces were the pink ones, they matched the color scheme of the Titans.

Twilight Imperium is... How do you describe it? It's a strategy game, a diplomacy game, a game that looks like it's about the awesome pieces but it's about the alliances and hostilities between factions, real and imagined. It's a full sci-fi movie, complete with heroes and epic space battles and epic negotiations in the council. The lore is extensive and the mechanics are fine-tuned. (It's the fourth edition of the game, after all.)

This was our group's first playthrough with the expansion Prophecy of Kings, so we had new factions and mechs and relics to work through. We've played maybe four times before, with slightly varying groups of people but always our core four. I was the only one who'd played the expansion, with a different group entirely.

I played the faction The Titans of Ul, giant sentient robot people who love nature and have gardens. I was pink. Purple player was the Brotherhood of Yin (all clones but some are diseased and some aren't), blue was the Ghosts of Creuss (freaky gaseous teleporting people), black was the whatever Gene Sorcerers (dunno what was going on with them except for being freaky), and the red was Nekro Virus (the Borg). I felt a little bad because the Virus kid got the short end of the stick, but he did choose the Virus, and they're just naturally aggressive, sooooo

Our game was really space cannon-heavy, you could hardly move anywhere in the galaxy without someone trying to snipe you through a wormhole or something stupid like that. Three out of five of us had War Suns (Death Stars but without the copyright infringement) at the end, two of them had two War Suns. The Ghosts got hit hard at the beginning and had an awful time trying to catch up.

One of my favorite moments was the Virus getting very fed up with the Ghosts sitting on a few objective-necessary locations. The Virus took in his War Sun, flagship, and a ton of small guys to beat on one of the Ghosts' stronghold systems. The Virus took over the system (the Ghosts kept some presence on the planets), but not without some damage to himself. Then the Brotherhood sent in his lone flagship... which was subsequently destroyed by the Ghosts' upgraded space cannons sitting next to that system. Destroying the Brotherhood's flagship causes it to blow up, entirely decimating what was left of the Virus's army. And then the Ghosts came back into the empty system and took it over again. The Virus was not very happy.

11/10, would play again. I really gotta go to bed now!!