#it's kind of a minor bug but like. why has this game not had any bug fixes lmao

[marlynnofmany]

The Right Time and Place

I was just sitting down for lunch alongside most of the crew when Captain Sunlight joined us with an announcement. She tapped her claws against the doorframe for attention.

“Minor detour before we reach the station,” she said when everyone quieted. “We’re taking a different wormhole, and doing a job on the way. This is a weird one. The client was cagey with the details. He said not to tell anyone else, so of course I’m telling all of you. Because you deserve to know what you’re getting into. Even if we’re not entirely sure what we’re getting into.” She shook her lizardy head in exasperation.

Zhee spoke up. “What’s the task, and why are we doing it?”

“We’re parking the ship briefly,” said the captain, waving vaguely in what I assumed was the direction of the wormhole. “In the middle of nowhere, at a precise location and time, staying there for at least fifteen minutes. Then we go get paid.”

“Huh,” said Paint. “That is weird.”

“Before anyone asks, I did press the client for specifics. He promises there are no hazards of any kind, and willingly signed every form I threw at him. He paid half up front. He paid extra! This is clearly very important, and he didn’t want to say why. But we’re covered if anything untoward happens, which it shouldn’t.”

Mur waved a tentacle. “He’s probably a spy. That’s my vote.”

Eggskin took a lid off a food dish with the air of someone deliberately not paying attention. “Spies are generally more subtle. In my experience.”

I made a mental note to ask Eggskin about that later. Zhee was talking now.

“What type of person was this client?” he asked. “As far as you know.”

Captain Sunlight recited a list, counting on her knuckles as she did. “Wealthy, planet-based, human, young adult…”

“Aw, human?” I said. “I would have liked to be there for that conversation, see if I could pick up any clues from body language. Did he seem calm, or twitchy like he knew it was a bad idea?”

Captain Sunlight spread her hands. “I’m sure I don’t know. But you’re free to speculate. It will be a while before we arrive at the designated location; you all may as well finish lunch. I just wanted to keep everyone informed.”

Nobody else had questions, so she left to tell the others who hadn’t heard yet. Mimi was still in the engine room, and Trrili was finishing a translation with Coals. Aside from Wio in the cockpit, that was all of us here.

And we were ready to talk about it.

“Maybe it’s a sport!” suggested Blip. “One we haven’t heard of yet!”

“Like what?” asked Blop. “He would have said if a ball was going to hit our ship, or something like that.”

“No, I mean like a strategy game, with pieces scattered around the galaxy. Maybe light has to reflect off our ship or something.”

“I still think he’s a spy,” insisted Mur.

Zhee turned back to his food. “I expect he’s an imbecile. Perhaps he lost something drifting in space, and wanted our ship to intercept it ‘accidentally.’”

Paint shook her head. “No, he would have said if something was on a collision course, even something soft.”

“I think it’s science,” Kavlae said, popping open a can of something. “No idea what the experiment is, or what we’re helping to accomplish, but something.”

I’d been thinking up other possibilities, and a new one occurred to me. “I wonder,” I said, “If he’s doing a really complicated marriage proposal.”

“A what?” Zhee asked, cleaning his mandibles in the bug-alien equivalent of licking his lips. “Oh, a mating offer. Aren’t those always complicated for your species?”

“They can be,” I said. “Some people like to make grand gestures, like pay to have it written in the sky, or something else visible and dramatic. I could see our ship being a last-minute replacement for one that couldn’t make it to the lineup in time.”

“Hm,” Zhee said noncommitally. “How embarrassing.” Then he stuck his face back in the bowl of intestines or whatever, and I looked somewhere else.

“That would be exciting,” Paint said. “I wonder if the captain asked about any other ships in the region.”

“Guess we’ll find out,” said Mur as he cracked a walnut with one tentacle. (Walnut-ish, at any rate. It looked kind of purple.)

“I hope we find out!” I said. “If the client manages to keep it a secret, I think we’ll all be disappointed.” The others agreed, and I turned my attention back to my own lunch. It was a peanut butter and honey sandwich, with apple slices and a fruit-and-veg smoothie. All tasty stuff. Not a soul onboard aside from me was going to touch the honey, because apparently they didn’t grow up on planets where “insect spit and nectar” was a popular food item. Their loss.

Lunch passed without incident, and so did the time until we arrived at the super-secret rendezvous point. Everybody who didn’t have something more important to do loitered in the hallway outside the cockpit, hoping for clues. Apparently this patch of space was empty as we approached, which ruled out a couple theories.

Paint clicked her claws together nervously. “Are we sure we’re not bait for something? I know he signed the forms…”

Wio called from the pilot’s seat, “There is absolutely nothing on the scanners, and I’ve got them set to max. Short of another space worm adventure, nothing’s going to sneak up on us.”

Kavlae made a considering sound. “That would be some interesting science.”

I had to laugh. “Interesting is one word for it!” The time we’d seen a new wormhole being created — courtesy of the space worms being chased by something larger and worse — there had been far more panic than scientific curiosity. “I’m pretty sure no one’s figured out how to track space worms, much less predict where they’re going to be with this kind of accuracy.”

“Has the timing started yet?” Zhee asked.

Captain Sunlight said over her shoulder, “We’re here early. I wanted to give us time to take our position with absolute certainty.”

There was some grumbling (mostly from Zhee), and we settled in to wait.

Finally Captain Sunlight announced the beginning of the timer, and we waited some more. Not a thing stirred. Wio kept a constant eye on all the scanners and sensors, while the rest of us watched the screens as best we could without crowding in there and getting in the way. Nothing happened.

“And we’re done,” said the captain. “Anticlimactic is better than crisis. Wio, take us in to the station.”

Wio did, aiming for the nearest wormhole and making the trip with more disappointing uneventfulness.

Thankfully for everyone’s curiosity, the client was within hailing distance when we exited into the space station’s territory.

Mur whispered, “I thought he was based on a planet?” while the captain set up the call.

Zhe clicked a pincher quietly. “Either he left it, or he’s a liar.”

Paint shushed him as the client appeared on screen. He really was a human: about college age, naturally tan skin, artificially blonde hair. A fashion sense that I would tactfully describe as “rich person nonsense.” So much metallic embroidery; sheesh.

He was polite enough, and all I was getting from his body language was that he was anxious about whether we’d done the weird job correctly. It was probably a good thing the camera didn’t reach into the hallway where all of us were staring at him.

Captain Sunlight went over the details calmly, and convinced the guy that we’d fulfilled our end of the bargain. He authorized the money transfer and looked relieved, muscles relaxing visibly.

I was pretty sure these weren’t the mannerisms of someone setting up a marriage proposal. He’d still be nervous about that. What was it?

On behalf of all of us, Captain Sunlight asked again. “What sort of sensitive nature is this task we’ve just done for you? I hope we won’t face repercussions down the line for obstructing some lawmaker’s telescopic view of a crime, or playing unwitting decoy.”

Apparently the good captain had also been thinking up possible scenarios. Those hadn’t even occurred to me.

“No, no, nothing like that,” he said, waving both hands. “Well, almost— No, it’s nothing like that.”

“No?” asked Captain Sunlight with a lift of her chin. “Which one is almost? Might we be a suspect in some criminal case now?”

“No, no!” He was getting really flustered now. “It’s the telescope one.”

“So a lawmaker was watching us sitting there suspiciously?”

“No!” He threw his hands in the air. “I tripped on the steps, all right? In public, boarding my ship, I fell all the way down the stairs and it was terrible. I had to bribe everybody who was there in person to keep it to themselves, but I’m going to go visit someone and—” He bit off the rest of the sentence. “That someone likes to borrow their planet’s largest telescope to watch me leave when I do. Your ship blocked the view. Thanks to wormholes and my top-notch computing formula, I was able to arrange it all before the light traveled that many light years away from home.” He ran his fingers through his hair, messing up completely. “Now please, don’t tell anybody!”

Captain Sunlight assured him that she wouldn’t spread it around, and bid him a regal goodbye. The screen clicked off.

The snickering in the hallway turned into full-blown laughter.

Trrili stalked up to join us, with Coals walking just outside of accidental pincher-poke range. “What was it?” she demanded. “Was the client an imbecile?”

“Yes,” Zhee told her. “But not in a way we expected.”

Paint was still laughing. “He didn’t want somebody to see that he fell down the stairs!”

Mur filled her in on the other details, but Trrili’s antennae angled into a frown. “Why go to all that trouble? Why not simply threaten witnesses and be done with it?”

“I suspect,” I said, “That the person watching was someone he has a crush on. He doesn’t want them to think badly of him.”

Trrili looked at Zhee. “Human mating rituals?”

“Looks that way.”

Trrili turned her faceted glare towards me. “Why do your people make things so complicated?”

I laughed. “Hey, this was overkill as far as I’m concerned too! If the person you want to date can’t handle a little pratfall like that, then they’re clearly not a good choice.”

Trrili was quiet for a moment, then said, “Two legs. Right. This must come up often for you.”

“It really doesn’t!”

She shook her head and turned away.

Paint spoke up helpfully: “You should hear about the mating proposals that they write in the sky!”

“Very no thank you.”

As Trrili walked away and the rest of the crew found other things to do, Paint told me, “I do want to hear about those. How do they write them? Does the answer go in the sky too?”

“Not for the proposals I’ve seen,” I said. “But there’s always a first.”

~~~

The ongoing backstory adventures of the main character from this book. More to come! And I am currently drafting a sequel!

[teecupangel]

I wonder if you’ve ever thought about like, a glitch or a virus in the Animus accidentally causing all the playable ancestors to become self-aware and sentient. I kind of like the idea of them realizing they’re all essentially kinda stuck in the Animus servers and then banding together to essentially blow up Abstergo. hell, maybe Desmond is the reason why they’re all sentient, something about the Apple and the Eye started doing weird things to the samples they took from him so now the ancestors have to find his consciousness!

also I am ngl I think it would be very funny for them to occasionally be able to break into each other’s simulations for various purposes. Edward popping into the American Revolutionary War to say hi to his kid and grandkid. Jacob and Evie and Henry in Constantinople. Altaïr rolling around in the Caribbean, god help this poor non-swimmer.

(and maybe once they’ve gotten him out of wherever he’s been stashed Desmond can teach these guys how to like actually get into Abstergo’s servers and start ruining their lives?)

Ooooohhh, this would be fun and, considering which company Abstergo partnered with to develop the Animus games, this could have just as easily happened because bugs had always been part of the course when it concerned the games they have published.

It might have been a flaw in the Animus game console itself, simply because they had developed a ‘console’ that either didn’t require that the user be related to the genetic memory at all (which had been necessary to stabilize and synchronize with the memories) or they had included a ‘data set’ that includes the DNA origin to stabilize and synchronize with the memories (which meant that they were dealing with a setup they had not fully checked yet (considering Black Flag’s modern day setting was set in 2013 and was released before Rogue’s modern day setting in 2014, that would mean that their Animus iteration had to have been developed and send to Abstergo Entertainment with Sample 17’s data in a year or less).

Also, also, we have seen how ‘viruses’ can interact with the Abstergo games. Liberation’s secret ending which shows the ‘scenes’ that Abstergo tried to remove so that it seemed like Aveline joined the Templar Order in the end could only be accessed by finding a specific NPC in the game in various memory blocks.

So, in this scenario, the whole ‘non-canon character’ popping into other games could have happened during development BUT the Animus game they ship was meant to copy the memory blocks that research analysts got in development so those small inconsistencies could have happened during their breaks or flat-out during a time when no one was using the Animus at all.

The easter eggs (or some fans like to call them “too unrealistic and plain fanservice”) would be included in all the copies of their specific games those games only had minor tweaks to ensure they won’t crash (and have DRMs, I guess) and lesser time for Q&A because, let’s face it, they needed to cut costs somewhere before they were shipped off to ensure they had a yearly release.

It became just a normal part of the charm of these games and Abstergo is just going “Yes, it’s meant to show that we are all connected no matter how many centuries we are from one another!” but internally there are memos going “WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING???”.

Also, also…

We should set up some kind of timeline, I guess?

Because, as far as we can be sure, the only confirmed games that Abstergo Entertainment released are the following:

Liberations (based on Liberation with Aveline) - Prior to 2013

Pirates of Nightmares (based on Black Flag with Edward) - Around 2013 (also has a movie version called Devils of the Caribbean)

Note: We do not have any confirmation that they released any games based on Shay Cormac and, honestly, with how much Shay’s defection hinged on the power of the artifact (which they had probably had to cut out since they were going for ‘realism’), any games based on Rogue would probably need a lot of cuts and edits. They might have just, you know, given up on that in the end.

Buuuuutttt we have confirmation of these games as having been published prior to Arno Dorian’s memories being checked:

Not counting the three on the bottom which we don’t really have any information about, this means that we have confirmation that the following have been released (and, in Edward’s and Aveline’s case, this could have been a re-release ala HD remastered style which Liberation did get in the PS4 era):

Altaïr

Shao Jun

Ezio (also, it’s just sooo Abstergo to go for ‘Fear and Loathing in Florence’, a reference to AC2, but use Ezio’s Brotherhood robes… soooo like Abstergo to use the Brotherhood!Ezio model)

Ratonhnhaké:ton

Aveline

Edward

BUT then you also get

Jacques De Molay

Rodrigo Borgia

Haytham Kenway

This means that if you want the Animus servers' data to be sentient then you can make at least these three Templars sentient as well if you wish to add more conflict to the entire thing.

Now, if we keep the supposed release date with the idea that they released it as Aveline → Edward → Altaïr → Shao Jun → Ezio → Ratonhnhaké:ton → HD releases (or maybe Helix is meant to be a collection like the real-world example of Ezio Trilogy or Rebels Collection)

Then what can happen is that Aveline is the first one to ‘wake up’ and she finds herself in the Caribbean, waking up on Edward’s ship. She tries to ask where she is and her appearance caused Edward to snap out of the ‘Animus control’ and gain sentient.

Then they decide to try and find out where they are via the Jackdaw, sailing her beyond the supposed walls of this place they find themselves in.

It’s during their travels and checking the strange ports (imagine lots of glitching + the entire vibe of Animus Island back in Revelations with each map turned into an island so this means that landlocked maps like Florence and Monteriggioni are now islands) that they see an Assassin taking down a target at the port before running away. They give chase and that’s how they meet Altaïr in Acre docks. Their appearance snapped Altaïr into gaining sentient but not just that…

He remembers up to his death, unlike Aveline who remembers up to her wedding night and Edward who remembers up to a night with Tessa.

No.

Altaïr knows more about where they are than he should.

And that’s when he sees it.

A figure walking the streets of Acre, walking further and further away from them, clad in white that did not belong in his time.

Altaïr gives chase and the two followed him because Altaïr knows more than them, that was for sure.

Altaïr still loses him but he feels like he knows that figure… knows it’s a man and he’s important.

He points at Edward as he says, “Important to both of us.”

But he also knows the man isn’t here in the island composed of Altaïr’s memories anymore.

And Aveline and Edward get a crash course of who they truly are (digital construct of the memories of long-dead Assassins) and where they are. The where is more confusing because Altaïr uses words like “the Animus must always be online to connect to the servers”, “this is the server that has all the data of all researched and analyzed memories”, etc but Edward just summarized it as “prison created by Templars, right?”

“In a way.”

So they board the Jackdaw to try and find an exit and to find this supposed man that was important to Altaïr and Edward.

Along the way, they docked in a port that ends with them waking up Shao Jun as she’s running away from those hunting her. She remembered that this was the memory where her mentor told her to find Ezio Auditore and Altaïr thinks he knows the name.

“But I know of a different name for him as well… Prophet. He was… He was the prophet of that man.”

Shao Jun joins them and she recognized Florence so they docked there and they find Ezio who was looking for feathers.

Ezio stares at Altaïr for a moment then he stares behind Altaïr, his eyes going wild. Altaïr immediately knew what he was looking at he quickly turned around.

This time, the figure was running the rooftops of Florence and the two gave chase, making the rest run after them.

During the chase, Ezio shouts, “Desmond!” and the figure stopped and turned around.

Before they could see his face, a flock of birds flew between them, and the man was gone.

They reached where they last saw the man and Ezio recognized it.

This… was where he and Federico wished that their lives would not change… the day before Ezio’s entire life turned upside down.

With Ezio becoming part of their crew, Ezio had the same information as Altaïr. He knows who he is, where they are, and what they truly are.

But his memories end after seeing Altaïr’s remains underneath Masyaf.

And… he also has his Apple.

Altaïr sees the Apple and realized…

He opened his pouch and, yes…

He has an Apple as well.

So Ezio joined them too and they continue to sail Jackdaw. (If you’d like Adéwalé to be sentient as well even if we have no confirmation that Abstergo profited from his memories as well, this would be a good time to do it)

This time, they get into a naval combat with an unknown ship and Edward is enjoying himself. The ship was beautiful and whoever was in command knew what they were doing.

So Edward decided to ram it and they’d all pile onto the other ship. The crew wouldn’t be able to win against 5 Assassins after all.

But the moment they rammed the ship, both of their ships began to glitch just as they hear a man with a British accent shout, “How is it you came to captain a ship, given the way you sail?”

When the glitching stopped, the Jackdaw looked like it had absorbed the other ship, creating a new ship that seemed to be a merged version of the two.

And there was an Assassin on board that they didn’t know. An Assassin holding an Apple and… he was looking to their right.

Where a lone island filled with buildings taller than any towers they had ever seen could be seen just before the horizon.

The Assassin pointed at the island and turned to face Edward as he said, “He’s waiting for us there… grandfather.”

(If you want Haytham to gain sentient, he’s in the captain’s quarters and he’d open the door a few seconds later with a splitting headache, telling Ratonhnhaké:ton his sailing is shit then stop when he sees Edward. Cue awkward family reunion)

Other Unorganized Notes:

I’m sorry I couldn’t include Jacob, Evie, and Henry, nonny. :(

This was focused on the idea that the Abstergo servers mainly have data of the published ‘games’ while the memories still being researched are in another more secured private server.

Although, considering that Arno and the Frye twins were more ‘modified’ by the Assassins, maybe they could come in as a virus before Edward and the others meet Ratonhnhaké:ton. I think it would be a change of pace if Arno and the Fryes (with Jayadeep) know more than the ‘old guards’. Hell, they could say “We hitched a ride with the virus Erudito sent to find Sample 17 because the public noticed he always makes an appearance as an NPC in all the games so the Assassins think that he’s somewhere here.” “He’s not 17. His name is Desmond.” “Right, didn’t mean to offend anybody.”

[sovonight]

since it's come up a couple times, i thought i'd just make a post about it! here we go:

i keep seeing you talk about this xan guy, but who is he?

xan is a potential companion in baldur's gate, the first game in the baldur's gate series. in the vanilla game, he has basic voice lines that play in reaction to commands, other companions, and the locations you're in. in fact, all of his voice lines can be viewed in the "quotes" section on the wiki; that's the extent of the content he has.

wait, i thought he was a full-fledged companion with friendship and romance paths? also, isn't he in baldur's gate 2?

he is, but only with the use of mods!

BG1NPC adds xan's banter, commentary, and romance path to bg1 (alongside a lot of other things, take a look at the readme!)

Xan's friendship path adds xan's friendship path to bg1

Xan BG2 NPC adds xan to bg2, as well as 2 romance paths, a friendship path, and a new soundset

Alternate Xan Soundset for BG2 restores xan's bg1 soundset to him in bg2, because nothing beats the original

if you want to romance him, make sure to play as an elf, unless you're ready for a bit of heartbreak ;( non-elves can romance him for a bit in bg1, but at one point you'll be forced to break it off.

i'm interested in playing the series, but where should i start?

i've broken it down here!

do you have any other mod recs?

i still play with the original (non-ee) games, so a lot of my mods are just widescreen fixes & bug fixes that are already covered in the ee games. but one list i have on hand is glittergear's bg2 mod recs!

why don't you like xan in bg2?

spoilers ahead, but:

i don't agree with his characterization and the execution of his romance paths as a whole

his bonded bg2 romance is worse than his bg1 romance, and intimacy with him almost always involves sex now, when it didn't before

he's been made ridiculously old

he's out of character, and many of his reactions are just odd

i don't agree with his death, and here's more paragraphs why

bonded xan is too ready to serve goddess!charname, when based on past behavior i'd think he would have a firm stance against it

his player-initiated dialogue options are poorly thought out

he was altered to have proficiency in darts instead of slings. darts fucking suck, why would you do this to him

his behavior would hurt radri, a lot

the list goes on

why are you still drawing/writing about him in bg2, then?

i love xan and radri together, i can't just write him out of bg2

😔 i can fix him 😔

but you think xan in bg1 is perfect, right?

not totally, i've always felt like his romance was biased in favor of one personality type

he is SO ace-coded to me, but his author clearly had a different vision for him

there's more, but they're all minor nitpicks compared to my complaints about him in bg2

you've complained a lot about him, so what do you even like about xan??

he's just so ridiculous, in the best ways

he can be snippy and dramatic, but also so kind

i love his romance in bg1

i enjoy his habit of carrying charname for romantic gestures, even though radri is like 200 lbs with light armor, and he's, what, 130 lbs sopping wet? i know, he was probably written with an elven waif of a charname in mind, but it's almost sweeter to think of him going out of his way to make it happen

you keep mentioning radri, but who is she?

my gorion's ward, my bhaalspawn, my charname, my beloved protagonist

she's like the kicked puppy to xan's pathetic kitten

here's an introduction, but honestly, it's easier just to read about them

why do you like the series, but not baldur's gate 3?

baldur's gate 3 has next to nothing to do with the series and should've been named something else

i was disappointed by it when i did play it

there's a sexual overtone over the entirety of the game

i'm tired of romances that put sex first

it's impossible for me to relax and enjoy the game

again, it's a really horny game

i'm just way too ace for it

bg3 overtakes all search results when trying to search for information on bg1 (which, being titled baldur's gate, doesn't get the benefit of a number to set it apart from the other games). sure, filters exist, but that doesn't change the fact that an era of easy information retrieval is over

what do you think about the references to xan in baldur's gate 3?

i want to die

i would rather kill xan myself than let bg3 touch him

it's a small mercy that he wasn't cursed with an actual cameo

[dalekofchaos]

Havik NEEDS Hotaru

I think my biggest complaint about Khaos Reigns aside from the Sektor & Cyrax design change is No Hotaru.

For those who did not get around to playing Deception & Armageddon. Let me tell you about Hotaru.

Hotaru is a General from the realm of Seido, the Realm of Order, and devotes himself to preserving law and order at any cost - to the point that he can be considered a fanatical zealot. Hotaru is more of a lawful-type of neutral (equivalent to his opposite pole Havik, who spreads discord and chaos) because he preserves law and order and harshly punishes those who dare break it, but he is not above preserving it to a higher authority (such as the Dragon King Onaga).

Not to mention what a sick design he had

Plus his special move was lava arrows.

There is so much you can do with him on gear alone.

Hotaru has so many things going for him.

Tall and imposing af which is rather unique for none-Shokan characters

Has cool carapace armour

Has a Naginata, a weapon that nobody else on the roster uses

Has cool lava themed abilities, something else rather unique to him that can be incorporated into so many combo chains, specials, finishers ect along with his Naginata.

His name means firefly in Japanese and he has a special called grasshopper. Take the lava burst and exoskeleton armour on top of this and do something cool with the fire bug theme.

A general from the Orderrealm or head of the Sedio Secret Police, you could not only delve into his conflict with Havik and make Havik more relevant in the main story but you could also give him some kind of rivalry with Shao, another general of a similar stature who shares Hotaru's militaristic themes and a warped mirror image of his disciplinism. Hotaru is actually on Outworld with other refugees from Seido as Mileena let them in so this could be set up quite easily.

His potential for badass outfits is limitless

Like how CAN YOU NOT SEE THE POTENTIAL????

And let's take a look at Havik's bio from MK1

"A citizen of the realm of Seido, Havik is sworn to take down its oppressive regime and free his people. There, order is prized above all else. Lawbreaking is met with strict punishment. Its citizens live in strictly regulated castes. As a member of Seido's lowest caste, Havik had neither rights nor privileges. He seethed with anger at the injustice. When he is brutally punished for a minor crime, Havik finally decides to act. He sets out to destroy Seido's regime and replace it with an anarchist utopia. Once he breaks Seido's social order, Havik will free its citizens. Together, they will live in blessed anarchy."

And you mean to fucking tell me you couldn't put someone in charge of Seido's oppressive regime or even the leader of Seido's secret police in the game? You're seriously telling me there was NO place for Hotaru in this story? Get the fuck out of here with that shit "Notaru" shit, Ed.

Also? They kind of gave Darrius story to Havik as a revolutionary. Speaking of Darrius, again WHY are they giving two revolutionaries but no goddamned oppressive figure from Seido to fight against???

Hotaru being absent from MK1's narrative is a creative failure. Like, they could've painted a shade of grey on Liu's character by having him recruit Hotaru to help maintain order in his timeline. The fact that there is no Chaos Realm just tells me Liu Kang just forced Hotaru and Havik to co-exist and that led to potentially Hotaru enforcing oppressive Order by any means necessary while Havik becomes an anarchist.

Hotaru would be fantastic here, especially as a overtly order obsessed character who yes, is aligned with the good guys, who slowly realize "aw shit this guys gonna be a problem too" as his methods and beliefs and goals aren't perfectly aligned by any means beyond "stop havik"

I think it’s kinda baffling how we have a story expansion where Havik is the villain and they just leave out the golden opportunity to bring back Hotaru.

Havik is chaos personified. Hotaru is the worst aspects of Order. He can go from saving you, liberating villages and setting up a fucking police state and NRS STILL does not see the potential in Hotaru?

[m-ilkiee]

HIII IM BACK!! Sorry if this doesn’t make any sense btw. My mind is lowkey blank rn, and idek what I say sometimes. Anyways ONTO THE TOPIC.

First off all, Mikey… Sigh, where do I even start… He’s interesting to me. For me, he's hot and cold, and he switches up so fast that he’d most likely give you a whiplash (could be because of his dark impulse? I’m not sure yet). Speaking of that, when would his dark impulse come out? Or when would it “shine” the most? I’m curious how the reader would react to that or how it’ll impact the story. Very many different ways, and they all will be terrible I’m sure… I’m so excited for new updates but also hella fucking terrified lmao. I’d say out of the two, I think Mikey is a bit more lenient. Not to say he’s not cruel, but he wouldn’t be AS cruel to her like Izana would. Though, since he doesn’t physically abuse reader, I can tell his mind games bouta be CRAZYYYY. MANIPULATIVE MF ISTG. That scene in the car still traumatizes me. Mf had the audacity to put the blame and shame on HER WHEN HE FUCKING QNDJFKFK IM SO MAD JUST THINKING ABOUT IT AAAA. Also, this is probably a minor detail, but him in a criminology class is lowkey funny to me lol. I’m surprised he’s actually attending classes. Does Izana do the same? Or would he not give a fuck?

Next, Izana. You crazy mf imma strangle you too- Mf said “I’m a king so kneel☝️🤓” BITCH U LOOK LIKE A LASH BUG STFU- (me when I know my dumbass would fold immediately when he told me that). Chapter 2 got me soooo fucked up, especially towards the end. My only saving grace is Kakucho fr, ik he’d never let me down🤞🤞 Izana is also manipulative af, but he’s ALSO not afraid to get physical with reader if he has to. I feel like the only reason why he DOESN’T is because of Emma. Or else the reader would’ve been 6 feet under I fear…HOWEVER!! I saw the post of a small spoiler for chapter 3, the one where he’s talking with Kisaki. Even though I’m not quite sure yet, when Kisaki asks Izana if he’s feeling guilty for pushing the reader to the edge like that, THAT got me thinking. Can Izana of all people feel guilty for almost making her commit suicide? He did say he thought about killing her himself at first, so what’s stopping him really? I have a feeling he wouldn’t develop any romantic feelings for her (yet?) this early on in the series (but I could be wrong, who knows), so why is he bothered at the thought of her dying? Killing people left and right is like a normal Tuesday for him. What do you think? I’m curious.

Damn… this makes me think, what would happen if the reader isn’t friends with Emma? Would she attract the attention of those two? Or would they not interact at all? I think they most likely wouldn’t treat her as badly since she doesn’t affect their relationship with Emma in any way if they aren’t friends, but then again, it’s Mikey and Izana we’re talking about… For some reason, I think Izana would be the first one to notice the reader instead of Mikey. I think her kind and gentle nature would catch his attention without them interacting since I’m sure he’s very perceptive (which is interesting considering how he is.) As for Mikey…would he even go for someone like her in the first place? Ik everyone’s game to him but idk, I feel like Mikey prefers someone who can keep up with him in a way, or at least matches his energy u know? She’s so fragile, he gon break her…

Okay, enough yapping for now lmao. I really enjoy talking about this with you!! It’s very very fun :)) (I have no one else who knows about monsters to yap to😔)

Okay okay

To answer your question, yep, it is the dark impulses that makes Mikey acts that way, especially around people that make him tick. And oh boy the further Monsters goes as a story, the more outspoken those dark impulses would be for him towards reader. You're completely spot on about Mikey being lenient with reader, as long as she does what he says and accepts his gifts or affection when he gives it, then everything will be fine. Eventually it won't be enough to just do what he says because of how unhinged he'd become as he loses himself to the darkness. As for reader, she's slowly realizing that there's something wrong with Mikey and she's going to try her best to placate Mikey whene those dark impulses eventually seep out until she can't take that kind of abuse anymore.

Izana does nawt like to attend classes. He pays someone to do it for him. Mikey enjoys his classes sometimes but hates how boring lectures can be

Izana is someone that would NOT hesitate to smack reader if she said something he didn't like ONCE. Really, he HAS gotten rid of people that pissed him off once, reader is lucky that Emma cared about her or he would have sold her into prostitution and nobody would have known. As for that snippet, that was based on the old chapter 2 before the edit, but Izana isn't completely heartless towards the reader. He has thought of murdering her himself, but at the same time he feels pity for her since she's as good as an orphan with how her parents abandoned her like his did. So that's what I think.

If she wasn't friends with Emma, her treatment would be far better, but not exactly good. Izana would be the first to notice her, but when he does get reader, she'd be more of a pet or an object rather than a human being to him. Mikey may not even have noticed her unless something makes their paths cross, and even then, she isn't his type of girl.

I really LOVE your asks sooo much. Thank you for yapping with me about monsters. Feel free to yap in my inbox anytime any day.

[inevitablysomber-dark]

Ladybug (Chapter 6)

Intensely Dark! Rafe Cameron x Acutely Aware! Reader WARNING: Non-Consent, Manipulation, Kidnapping, Stalking, forced interactions, Causing trauma, unhinged obsession. MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY. MINORS DNI Summary: After a fresh breakup with her ex, Kyle, a chance encounter leads to an entanglement between Ladybug and her friend, Sarahs, volatile brother, Rafe, who had long standing conflicts with her friends. However, what began as an accidental hookup, quickly spirals into a troubling situation as Rafe's infatuation takes a darker turn. His fixation becomes a source of distress, as his persistent harassment disrupts Ladybugs Peace.

Series Masterlist

You were nervous, your hands were shaking, you had sweat on your brow, and it felt like you had a swarm of bugs playing an intense game of rugby in your stomach. 

You were going to see Ward Cameron, he wanted to meet with you and discuss the ‘trouble’ Rafe had been causing you as of late. Or at least thats how he stated it over the phone. Sarah had given him your number so that he could get in touch and figure out what day would best work for this meeting. 

At first you wanted to meet in a more public setting. Mr.Cameron insisted it would look offputting, but you didn’t budge until he absolutely promised you that Rafe would not be there. So you agreed, you had to at least try to get Rafe off your back. Ignoring Ward could lead to Rafe exhibiting more severe behavior, and you just wanted all of it to stop.

As you walk up to the mansion the first thing you notice is that Rafe’s truck is missing, which was a good start. But then you noticed Sarah’s own vehicle was missing and you felt your stomach drop a bit.

You were hoping to have some kind of support system as you faced the dragon, and were quite excited when she told you that she was home this morning. But you’d guessed she must have left on your way over. You couldn’t help but feel like you should have asked her to wait for you.

You could always turn back, instead you opted to ring the bell instead, and Ward was answering the door in no time almost aas if he’d been waiting for you on the other side. 

"Hey, Ladybug, come on in." He shifts his body, signaling for you to enter.

"Hi, Mr. Cameron," you say as you step inside.

"Mr. Cameron was my father; just call me Ward," he chuckles, attempting to make it sound warm and genuine, though it feels a bit forced. You simply nod in response and follow him to what appears to be his office. You wouldn’t really know, seeing as how Sarah had never bright you in here before.

"Please, have a seat." He gestures to the couch in the center of the room. You glance over at his desk, curious why he doesn't use it as he takes a seat across from you.

“So, it has come to my attention, that Rafe has been causing you a bit of trouble,” he starts, and you’re visibly taken aback.

`

“ ‘a bit of trouble’? Mr. Cameron what Rafe has done to be has gone bey-” you’re cut off. 

"Now, Ladybug, I understand that Rafe has become a bit of a hassle for you, but exaggerating the story won't help," he says sternly, as though scolding a child. A growing pressure builds inside you, intensifying until you can't hold it in any longer.

“He hurt me,”

His eyes squint, settling you with a mean glare, his demeanor completely changing from when you first walked into the mansion. 

"Now, Ladybug, you're aware just as much as I am that these are significant accusations. I trust you don't anticipate me idly accepting unfounded claims against my son," he says firmly.

“They aren’t unfounded, he hurt me Mr. Cameron,” you were desperate standing as you tried to convey the seriousness of Rafe’s crime, you needed him to believe you, you needed him to understand that he needed to get Rafe as far away from you as possible. “And frankly, if you refuse to do anything about it, it would be a shame, if word of his actions spread around the island,” you didn’t want to play dirty, but you couldn’t help but feel as though you were being backed into a corner. 

Ward chuckles 

“Try it, “ he says standing as he moved toward you “ I’ll ruin your entire fucking family with a snap of a finger, even that shithead father of your’s who went into hiding,”

“H-How?-” you start, but Ward interrupts you. 

“Listen little girl, the world was a complicated place before you were even born, I’m sure. But I’ll tell you what. I’ll do my best to keep Rafe out of your hair, but you have to keep your mouth shut.” He crosses his arms over his chest “ If you have any issues with him in the foreseeable future, come to me and I’ll get it sorted.”

You expected this from Ward, but hearing him him be so upfront about his position on the matter was still jarring. You grabbed your stuff and began to head out. 

“Don’t forget,” he yelled after you .

As you rush downstairs, you can't help but chastise yourself for your own misjudgment in thinking that, of all people, Ward would help you with Rafe.

It was a foolish thought that you never should've entertained. Now, you found yourself running away, feeling defeated, with a heart full of sorrow and confusion. Not only did you have Rafe's boot on your neck, but it seemed he had his father's support.

“Hey,”

You pause, your hand frozen on the front door handle, fear washing over you at the sound of the familiar voice. Your vision blurs as your heart races, and just when you think it's all over, a moment of clarity hits you. Without hesitation, you bolt out the door, slamming it shut with all your might.

Of course, you didn’t expect to be able to get away from him, but you had to try. 

You sprint, pushing your legs to the max, desperate to put as much distance as possible between yourself and the house. But your escape is cut short when you're suddenly yanked back by the waist, just as you reach the end of the driveway.

“Let go!,” you screech .

Digging your nails into the arm that tightly held your midriff. He pulls you closer, gripping your hair painfully, and forcefully pulling your head back.

His lips find the side of your head and he whispers in your ear. 

“You thought you could get away, but bitch I’m everywhere.” he says

Before he could make his next move, you hear a clang and Rafe drops you. When you look up Sarah’s pulling you away and John B. has Rafe in a headlock. 

“What the fuck Rafe?!” Sarah yells once she realizes that you’re ok.

Rafe managed to get out of the headlock John B. had him in and was currently punching the lights out of him. 

 He looks up at Sarah’s voice, but when his eyes meet your own, he’s after you once again. Sarah stands in front of you trying to protect you from his rampage, and John B. pulled himself up and hustled to catch up with Rafe. 

“Stop it Rafe!” Sarah screech “This is wrong, what you’re doing is wrong, you’re being a psycho, you asshole!!” Rafe finally stopped in front of Sarah and she flinched at his movement. 

“And you would know about something being wrong when you’re out here fucking Topper,”

John B finally got close enough to grab a hold of Rafe’s shoulder, he stopped “What’”

“What?” you echo. 

“I-I, he’s lying, I would-”

“I’m lying?” Rafe asked , he glances behind at John B. “ Did you ever figure out where she was the night of that party?”

He turns back to look Sarah “They were in her bedroom fucking, like rabbits.” He smirks and says, "I was looking for someone and I heard noise in her room. Thinking it was the person I was looking for, I opened her door." Rafe crosses his arms, his eyes filled with amusement as he stands tall. "Imagine my surprise."

“Sarah?” you whispered hoping she would deny it.

Unfortunately you catch Rafe’s attention, and he looks over at you. He shrugs John B.’s hand off his shoulder and gently pushes Sarah out of the way as she stood catatonic at the revelation Rafe had just made. 

Before you can comprehend what was happening next Rafe had your hand in his and was pulling you away from the chaos that he had unleashed. 

“No!” you start fighting back, the interaction broke John B. out of his heartbroken trance, and before he could get involved another voice gets all of your attention.

“Rafe.”

You all turn to face Ward standing with authority arms crossed, amused by the sight in front of him. 

“Come inside, I need have a word with you,”

“Dad-” Rafe starts to object but Ward cuts him off immediately.

“Rafe, in my office.”

You feel Rafe squeezing your hand in his own, but instead of protesting again, he pulls you close and whispers in your ear “Next time.”

He gently lets go before following his father up the driveway, annoyance found in each step. 

How the hell were you going to get away from him.

***

The drive on the way back to the Chateu was excruciatingly quiet, You and John B. had left Sarah stunned on her driveway, and gotten right into the minivan. On the way you couldn’t help but feel your heart break when you thought of Butterfly. You’d always known Topper was a piece of shit, you always expected him to hurt Butterfly, everyone did.

But you never expected Sarah to help.

She was your close friend, or at least you hoped she was, and you had always panned her out as a girls girl, and most importantly she always made it seem like Topper disgusted her. 

How could she do this? To John B. of all people.

You had made it to the Chateu a while and now you and John B, were sitting in his van in silence.

“You ok?”

“I-I”

“If you want I can make some dinner, and we can watch something on our phones.”

For the first time in a while, he finally reacts. He first sighs scrunching his face and covering his eyes, and laying back against his chair in a moment of silence. 

A few moments pass before he’s pulled out of his stupor. “You know what, go ahead and get started on dinner, I’ll be back.” 

Confusion etches your face “Where are you going?, is everything ok?” he moves over to your side opening your door and gently pushing you out.

“Everything is fine, I just need to go do something,”

“Alright?” you hesitantly step out, and as soon as you shut the door he’s off.  You trust John B. you were confident that he wouldn’t do anything stupid, but that didn’t make you any less worried. 

You step into the house to start on dinner hoping no more surprises would arise.

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@applelovesposts

[scorpiomother]

APOCALYPSE (pt. one)

summary: harry osborn sets you up on a blind date with his best friend, peter parker. peter isn’t too interested in the date, but can’t say no to coming home with you.

word count: 6.4k

warnings: explicit content. minors dni (+18) unprotected sex.

a/n: hope you all enjoy chapter one! unedited and just for fun! took forever to finally complete this! (: - s

playlist 𓆩♡𓆪 mood board 𓆩♡𓆪 read on ao3 𓆩♡𓆪 series list

CATALYST

“Do you want to come over?” Begging viridescent eyes pleaded for you to agree. But you knew better than that. To make a deal with the devil.

Harry Osborn was just some stuck-up rich kid with daddy's money. He was pretentious and you knew it the first time you met him during your interview to be his intern. Somehow, you qualified for more than an internship and he enjoyed your presence enough to request you as his secretary. You should’ve declined the position, but a job is a job, right? And who’s to deny a job with a convenient paycheck when you were living in America’s most expensive city? Not you, because you’re not dumb. But now, sometimes it felt like he just hired you as some eye candy or someone to permanently bug. Perhaps, both.

“I’m over here, aren’t I?” You huffed out.

He shook his head in annoyance but the grin on his face said otherwise. This was a common occurrence between you two. The usual game of cat and mouse. You both teased and asserted dominance and no one in particular ever wins. “Come over to my place tonight, Y/N.”

“Wow. Pretty straight to the point, Harry. Got tired of asking me out on a date?” You pouted.

“Y/N, I’m serious.” His body weight shifted to the door frame that led to his office. His arms were crossed as he leaned against the frame.

“And I’m serious when I told you I don’t go out with guys like you, Harry.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” His eyes are locked in with yours. It’s a staring contest between you two and you would be damned if you lost. 

You let your tongue wet your bottom lip before telling him why everything about you two would be a bad idea. “You get everything you want.” You leaned forward against the desk, letting your breast spill over. Your eyebrows furrowed as you gave Harry the best doe eyes you possibly could as if the words you said weren’t meant to sting. “But I also get everything I want. So, someone would have to lose eventually. And I hate losing.”

Though he has been kind to you and relatively easy on the eyes, you weren’t going to have unprofessional relations with the man who signs your check. But that didn’t mean you couldn’t have fun with him, right? He was practically blonde and cheeky. Easy to talk to and good-looking. He had a sexy tired look, dark circles with enticing eyes that you could just swim in. Sometimes, the way he caught glimpses of you made your heart skip. How could you not at the very least flirt with him a little? 

“So I can’t have you?” It didn’t quite come out as a question. The way it slips out of his devilish grin made you want to succumb to him and tell him you can have all of me. But this wasn’t the first time you had to deal with him and his snide remarks. He smiled with such confidence as if he knows he will have you one day and you just don’t know it yet.

“You’re my boss, Mr. Osborn. I’m not dating my boss.”

“Who said anything about dating?” Harry thought he was slick when he quickly glanced at your exposed chest and back into your eyes. You may have won the staring contest but now for all you know, Harry was thinking about your chest. And that’s a win for him.

The game no longer feels fun and you squashed any semblance of sexual tension with a roll of your eyes and slouch back into the chair. “Is this why you hired me? To prey and harass me?” 

He rolls his eyes. “Fine. Then what’s your type?”

“Why?”

“Just answer, Y/N.”

∗ ࣪ ˖༺ 𓆩☆𓆪 ༻˖ ࣪ ∗

You didn’t realize that out of all the people in the world, Harry Osborn was going to be setting you up on a blind date. A part of you felt like it was going to be a sick joke and Harry, himself, was going to walk through that door. Your supposed date was late and you felt yourself getting stood up. This man didn’t even know you and still bailed on you.

You blew air onto the once-steaming tea between your hands. It was cold now, but it was a habit to just blow on it. If you had something to keep you busy then possibly, the anticipated anxiety wouldn’t bubble over. That was the theory at least.

The cafe was quiet and dim. You noticed how the clouds slowly pulled over the sky, hiding the sun behind its grey. The April showers were more frequent now and you were smart enough to bring an umbrella in preparation for when they came. There was a bell that chimed when the door opened. You brought your attention towards the entrance to see a lanky boy in a grey jacket that ate him up. With wandering eyes, he looked around the cafe searching for someone. “Y/N?”

When he called your name it was like a command to you. Your legs pushed you up from the chair. You forced yourself to speak. “Hi?”

He towered over you with his slender and long limbs. He looked scrawny and sweet, his resemblance close to a puppy. In his grasp were a skateboard and a backpack perched on a shoulder. A sheepish smile spread across his face. “I’m Peter. I’m sorry I was late.”

“It’s okay. Y/N, but… You already knew that, though.”

Clear, barely-there-pink polish is chipping at your nails and it’s taking every ounce of you to not peel it off. Being focused on this date was the last thing you wanted to do. He took a seat across from you and took a second to drink you in. Your fingers grasped tighter onto your mug as if it would comfort you and help you make it through this situation. You thought that maybe you wanted it to be a joke so you wouldn’t have to try to woo over this man. It was easier to stay in your comfort zone than meet a handsome stranger at a coffee shop in Brooklyn.

The introductions and small talk were stiff, but you learned that he was in his third year of college for Biophysics and was extremely smart despite his overall lack of confidence. Harry listened to you when you said you liked nerdy boys and it was surprising that Harry could do anything remotely selfless or maybe you just underestimated him.

You felt your throat getting drier and drier as the conversation between you two continued. You wished that you were less observant and more naive. Then you would believe the date was going just fine. Then the bitter taste in your throat would be nothing but the oolong tea you’re nursing or even just a strange coincidental sensation. But every time you took a good look at Peter, his eyes never met yours and his pupils looked almost lifeless. You assumed it was the lack of confidence to excuse his averting eyes and closed-off personality, but you realized it was the lack of interest. He was just going through the motions and seemingly, to him, you were not a real human being with tangible emotions.

You attempted to keep up the intrigued act but you feel it slowly faltering. “Wow, so you work at the Daily Bugle? That’s awesome.”

“Yeah, but you know. I just take pictures,” he said modestly. 

You were waiting for something significant to happen. A phone call. Sudden closure of the coffee shop. A car crashing into the window. His eyes were wavering and his disinterest was clear. It would be a good time to suddenly combust into a million pieces of shame, considering you thought he was extremely cute. You wanted to be pulled away from this experience and give him a regretful oh no, I have to go!

Peter cleared his throat before taking a sip of his coffee. “So how do you know Harry?” 

“Unfortunately, he’s my boss. You?”

“Right. You work at OSCORP. I should’ve put that together…But, I guess you could say we’re best friends,” he shrugged like it was no big deal.

You laughed softly to yourself, “Harry Osborn is someone's best friend?”

“I think the same thing every day,” you were both smiling to yourselves, never looking up from the table. The topic of Harry has him perked up. “When we first met, mind you we were children, he had a wad of cash in his tiny baby hands and with all seriousness, he said, ‘be my friend’ and tried to give it to me!”

You feel bubbly from the thought of it. In disbelief, you said, “No way.”

“Yeah! He thought he could just buy me!”

“You were a baby escort!” You made a sour face.

“Exactly!” He shook his head, his eyes crinkling and cheeks starting to burn. Your hands were covering your smirk in an attempt to smother a cackle. 

“What did you say to him?”

“I said ‘you can’t buy friends.’ And he said ‘watch me!’ Then, he walked up to some other kid and handed him the money. He stuck his tongue out as if he bought the greatest, most loyal friend of all time!”

“He gave you that smug look, didn’t he? The one where he thinks he won.”

“Yes! That’s the one! The stupid look. And then the next day he had the audacity to bug me about how the kid wasn’t being a good friend!” Peter’s smile was radiating. It felt so warm.

“Of course not.” You’re amused with the thought of Harry as a child and it shows on your face. You’re pleased to have this new ammunition for the next time you see him. “Not much has changed with him, huh?”

“No. Not at all.” He said reminiscing.

You were simmering down from that spark and the quietness sat between you two once again. If you had been blind, then you could say the chemistry was starting to blossom. He was charming once the conversation was flowing. But as you stare at this man, you find him more and more inscrutable as his smile faded.

“Are you okay?” Your lips moved without realizing it.

“Oh?” He tilted his head in confusion, his eyes on your twiddling fingers, “Yeah, why do you ask?”

“You just seem… Like you’re not into this.”

“Ah, shit… Is it that obvious?” His eyebrows raised in surprise when it comes out like it wasn’t him who said it. “Shit. Not that I’m not not into this- Into you! I’m just… I have a lot on my mind right now and I-”

You gave him a nod, an uneasiness in you pulling at your mouth. “Peter, it’s okay.”

“I’m sorry, I’m just…”

“It’s okay,” you reassured him once more. “You don’t have to explain anything to me.”

He finally brought himself to look at you, really look at you. His brown whisky eyes glowed into yours for the first time. You felt yourself getting drunk off of his whisky eyes and your belly stirred with warmth. This stammering idiot was making your heartbeat without words or actions. A simple look was all it took.

At this point, it was dark out from the lingering clouds, and most patrons in the cafe had left. It was silent and you were worried he could hear your heart pounding. His eyes were the first to look away. You licked your lips, hoping this would reward you with another glance. “I should probably go.”

He nodded his head without looking at you, the apathetic mask secured tightly onto his face. Your heart dropped in disappointment. The moment you shared with him was nothing but a moment. Fleeting and gone.

“I’ll walk you,” he said.

∗ ࣪ ˖༺ 𓆩☆𓆪 ༻˖ ࣪ ∗

Walking to your apartment in silence was one way to do it, but it was definitely the most awkward way to go about it. It was late into the afternoon and you felt as though you wasted a perfectly good Saturday with this indifferent man. With him walking by your side, you noticed he’s significantly taller than Harry by a couple of inches.

The air was balmy and the streets were no busier or quieter than usual. There were clicks coming from your heels, the impact from the hard concrete being the only thing you could focus on. Your eyes were glued to your Doc Martens, Peter’s converse sauntering through the streets in your peripheral. You were hyper-fixated on avoiding anything that looked suspicious and that included harmless green gum that stuck to the pavement. It was better to worry about your cleanliness than this terrible date that Harry had set you up on. Harry wanted you to see that no one compares to him and that you should just give him a chance. That’s what you thought and you were embarrassed to tell him how the date went.

You avoided any cracks in the concrete, a game that normally keeps you grounded, but at this moment you used it to distract yourself. Drops of liquid made the concrete look like it has a terrible case of chicken pox. The darker grey spots start to fill up the surface area. There’s a drop of wetness dripping from your forehead to your cheek, looking almost like you were shedding a single tear. You heard a mumble of fuck come from Peter. He was slightly ahead of you, the back of his head in your vision.

“Oh, I have an umbrella.” Your voice came out more hoarse than you intended. 

Peter’s head shook in disagreement, allowing you to catch the slight frown on his face. “No. We have to go before it starts to get worse.”

“What? But I have an umbrella?” You started reaching into your tote bag before Peter took your wrist, and suddenly he was dragging you behind his slender legs.

Once you realized the two of you were running, you took repossession of your hand and started letting your strides get bigger in an attempt to keep up with his long limbs. Taking a deep breath, you caught a whiff of fresh rain and good ol’ city sewer that you’re normally able to ignore. The New York streets were ingrained into your senses, but on damp days the smell and essence of millions of people and rats permeated the air more intensely.

“Peter?” You called out to him, worried.

“Just run!” Peter replied without looking back, and though he could easily leave you in your tracks, he purposely kept a pace that is manageable for you. You’re stuck thinking, where did this sudden sense of urgency come from?

The light rain drops that tenderly grazed against your cheeks turned into pricks of needles hailing from above. The umbrella that weighed down your now soggy bag was mocking you. Your wet fingers were twitching to pull it out and shield you from the sudden downpour, but like a loyal and obedient dog, you adhered to Peter’s command. Just run. And so you followed him down the saturated streets that led to your apartment.

The feeling of your cardigan got heavier on your back, the rain permeating through the wool, spawning a shiver down your neck. “You must really not like rain!”

“Hate it!” He said. “It’s my camera!” He glanced back at you, his dark hair sopping and sticking to his forehead. He throws his thumb back, gesturing to his bag. And despite him and his backpack being drenched, the once apathetic man is now beaming with ecstasy. “You okay?”

“I’m okay,” you seemed to get out, appalled by the caprice of his mood. The analogous of nothing to everything with the weather and Peter stirred something in you. Your thoughts were stuck on the way that Peter will give you no crumb of himself and then like the weather, pour out all he is into you and give you the brightest smile a man could give. And that was everything to you.

“Take a right here!” You yelled to him. 

Turning onto the new street was atrocious with people pressing up against each other and umbrellas crashing against other umbrellas. It was human traffic. Peter reached out for your hand more gently this time. His worry for his camera has dissipated as he respectfully followed the traffic flow. He didn’t shove or push his way out or yell at people to get out of his way. He was gentle with how he held your hand. This gives you a second to catch your breath but it feels humid and sticky as everyone waddles past each other like penguins.

When you reached the end of the block, a red light deterred any movement. Your hand was still glued to Peter’s and whether it was intentional or not, you were thankful. Unlike the rest of your body, your hand was warm and you were clinging to the warmth Peter shared with you. 

“I was in such a rush, and we ended up being rained on, anyways,” Peter said, eyes cemented on the crosswalk.

For what seemed like the hundredth time, you told him, “It’s okay.” Except, it came out as a pitiful breath. Peter noticed this and you were granted his rare attention. Unfortunately, you were less than graceful at the moment. You were trying your best not to look like you’re heaving from complete enervation. Exhaustion drained your face and it looked like blood was rushing to the apples of your cheek. It was the worst time for him to study you.

In your peripherals, you spot the crosswalk sign turned from bright ruby to white. Your body propelled you forward like the city goers around you, but Peter’s grasp slacked you back towards him. Through the dew on your lashes, you detected the lingering from Peter. His deep umber eyes burned a hole through your face and his thumb brushed against your wrist. Shoulders and elbows are scraping at your sides as people make their way across the street, and yet you stayed right where Peter wanted you.

“Everything’s okay with you, huh?” He said with a genuine smile.

“Your camera.” You said, ignoring his question.

“It’s okay.” Peter dipped his head down, water beading off his forehead. His breath was warm against your lips, provoking your naive heart. Any womanly instincts inside of you were muted, the sound of rainfall and your heartbeat deafening. Your consciousness was instructing you to close the gap, but the weight on your chest denied you any movement. You were motionless, unsure of the situation- unsure of Peter. A sliver of air was the partition that separated your collision. The tip of his nose brushed against yours, a drop of rain from his face trailing down to yours.

What was he thinking? Because God knew you thought he had no interest in you, and here he is. Close enough to inhale your oxygen. Was this the depravity of a man? 

Before you knew it, you were tasting bitter coffee and you never favored the dark brew, but easily you wanted more. It was a pair of impulsive and wet lips. A match of shaky hands and twin hearts both racing past ribs cages. If you could, you would stay there forever kissing Peter until your fingers were pruney and ears frozen.

He was the first to pull away. You were worried he was going to apologize and you had to tell him it was okay, again. Instead, he just smiled. You convinced yourself a spark or two wasn’t going to put you in a romantic daze. A kiss in the rain, however, was something you were going to think about for a long time.

Hoping that this time you earn his full and eager attention, you licked the running dew from your bottom lip. “You know… You’re going to get sick.”

He stared at your parted lips just as you craved. “What do you suppose I do about it?” 

∗ ࣪ ˖༺ 𓆩☆𓆪 ༻˖ ࣪ ∗

It was your turn to drag Peter behind as you lead him to your apartment. You felt giddy and full of anticipation. His hands were tender and intertwined with yours as you took the stairway. When you reach the top of the third floor, wetness dripped down to the tiles and he pulled you into his strong arms. His biceps were thicker than you imagined. 

“Third floor, huh?” He let out a deep exhale, pressing his forehead to yours.

“Tired?” You whispered, lacking any appearance of satirizing, but rather with concern.

His lips tugged upwards, a toothy grin presented to you. “Never.”

The palm of his hands reached your jaw, his touch coercing soft whimpers from you. Peter rewarded you with his tongue, gently parting you open. It was a sight to see him transform. The detached and reserved Peter was now hungry and almost animalistic for you. You were grinding into each other like the push and pull of the ocean. Salt on his neck, wetness pooling at your panties. You haven’t even made it to your apartment yet. 

His strong grasp took you aback. Forceful hands gripping onto your belt loops, beckoning you near to his core. A thick bulge pressed to your lower abdomen, butterflies sprouting at the touch. Your nails dug into his chest fervently before taking a bunch of his hoodie into your clutch. This act of desperation from you urged a groan out from him. Low and reverberating. 

Just a simple proposition was all that it took to rile him up. To you, the obvious solution to avoid getting sick was to remove any wet clothes- and that was all of them at this point. Peter liked that idea. The way his eyes burned into your clothed figure told you that he liked that idea a lot and wasn’t opposed to undressing. Whatever happened after the discarding of clothes was up to his own volition. If you didn't feel chemistry with him an hour ago, you definitely felt it now as his eyes were unwavering from your body. And it was the most apparent when your shaky hands shamefully struggled to enter your apartment key into the hole and behind you, Peter held you gingerly at the sides, whispering, good girl when you finally managed to open your door. 

Maybe, it was just human nature. Whether you had chemistry together or it was just your instincts to survive and reproduce. You didn’t care either way. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was that Peter was slipping your damp cardigan down to expose your shoulder and pressing a tender-hearted kiss at the peak. You let it fall to the floor, a dull splat echoing as the open air sends goosebumps along your body. Peter's eyes gaped at your chest, your nipples becoming apparent past the sheer top. He wanted them in his mouth and you wanted to watch him suck on them.

You continued to take turns peeling off a drenched article one by one. You were both presenting your bodies to each other. Slowly taking the view in. Preparing for one another’s offering. In one easy motion, Peter threw his shirt over his head to reveal a toned and ripped chest. With his chiseled abs and ravenous eyes, you felt your heartbeat skip like a flat stone against a still river. Just as you were about to pull your underwear down, Peter stopped you.

“Not yet,” he said, pressing his hand against your cheek. He was kissing you again, taking your pride with it. You felt touch starved. Frantic hands grasped onto his muscular physique as if there was no time to memorize each piece of him. He was reluctant to give you pieces of himself, but his body, he gave you effortlessly. You were grateful.

He took a deep inhale into your shoulder, taking in your intoxicating aroma. The way he adored your body was harmful. You could feel yourself wanting more of him and his touch. You were stumbling over each other’s feet, ready to devour one another. Wants were swimming in Peters's head. He wanted to touch you. Wanted to kiss you. Wanted to fuck you upright and horizontally and any other way he could find. Want, want, want. He wanted you. He hoped his tongue conveyed that to you as he licked the nape of your neck.

His hands started at the small of your back. Like molasses, they slowly dripped down your body, a palm finding its way to your thighs. His touch was soft, barely there. Moving up and down on your inner thigh, sending you rushes of pleasure.

The air was filled with arousal. You were trembling as Peter’s hand slithered down your abdomen to the waistband of your panties. Your breath hitched as he put pressure on your clit. His fingers weren’t moving and it made your pussy throb with need. You took matters into your own hands and started rubbing your wet slit onto his hand like a toy. Your hips circled against his pressure.

“So wet for me,” his voice sent electricity down to your cunt. Desperate whines escaped your lips, turning Peter into something of a sex-crazed lunatic. Fucks alluded from his mouth, a mantra for himself to keep his cool. The sight of your bare breast slightly bouncing as you shifted your clit against him made him want to go ballistic. He could barely contain himself, but neither could you.

“Please,” you mewled. “I need your fingers in me.”

“Fuck.” His voice warmed the tips of your ears.

“Please, Peter.” 

“Beg for it.”

“Your fingers in me. I need them so bad,” Your bare chest was moving up and down from the pleasure. Peter couldn’t take his eyes off you, your hips moving against his still hand. “Please.”

His mouth became agape, watching you like prey, just before slipping in his thick middle finger. It went in seamlessly like he has fingered you a million times. Peter’s thumb made its way to your clit and applied the lightest pressure while moving his finger in and out of you. He could feel you tremble against his touch.

Peter’s fingers felt so good. You wondered how his cock would feel. “You’re so wet, Y/N.”

“You make me wet, Peter.” He’s fingerfucking you in your living room. You didn’t even make it to the bedroom, let alone the couch. You were both too consumed in pleasure to lay down nor sit down. You imagined that it was the way you were now addicted to his approval. If he wasn’t smiling at you, then you weren’t satisfied. He was a man with needs. There wasn’t more than that you presumed. It was okay because you were a woman with needs.

“Can’t wait any longer,” he said, pulling his finger out of you. Peter reached for the thin fabric on your hips and undressed you. His boxers were still on, his bulge thick. He was at your feet now and admiring your figure. Admiring your bare cunt.

You suddenly felt shy. Like you forgot how the two of you got into this situation as if it wasn’t your idea. You watched Peter, waiting for his next move. He pressed a soft kiss to your clit before standing up. “Lay down for me.”

For me, he said! The butterflies were surely tossing in your belly. He was taking off his boxers, and a perfect pink cock sprung out. It was hard not to lick your lips, eager for what was to come. With that length, his wish was your command. 

Now, naked on the couch, you were waiting for him. You were ready for this enigma of a man with an incredible body. As he came closer to the couch, he stroked his cock slowly. You watched his hand move up and down. It felt like he was teasing you.

He finally mounted you, his cock resting on your stomach. You could feel the precum leaking onto your skin. You could feel his breath on your cheek. You could feel everything at that moment. Your heartbeat. Your anxiety. The sweat on your temple.

He rubbed his thumb along your forehead, swiping away runaway tendrils of hair. You gave him a nervous closed-mouth smile. He gave you a half smile back, but his chocolate eyes assured you of his enthusiasm. 

His free hand grabbed his cock to guide it into you. Your lack of patience caused you to take it upon yourself to help him. You grasped the back of his hand that held his cock and ushered it closer to your needy pussy. His wet tip grazed against your slit. With his large length in mind, you spread your labia taut while your legs are splayed across the couch. The embarrassment of your need was clear on your face. You couldn’t even be bothered with protection! It had barely reached your mind, but your pussy was aching so desperately for Peter.

You moved your hips up and down against his smooth tip to cover in your wetness. His lips huffed out warm air on your ear. A slight shiver ran down your back as you could feel him press himself deeper. You arched your back, your body confused by this foreign gift. With this new opening, Peter let his hand grasp onto your lower back to help him bring you closer. His cock wasn’t even all the way in and your cunt was aching already.

He was so gracious to let you get used to his cock, pausing any further movement in entering you. His tongue gently played with yours. The taste of coffee was still there. On his lips, on his teeth, and on his tongue. It reminded you of the coffee shop where you had nothing to talk about with him, where chemistry was unfamiliar to you two. And now with rain dew turning into sweat and pheromones, the tip of his cock was making your pussy throb.

“You didn’t tell me you were so big,” you laughed nervously, hiding your face with his shoulder. He ran his hand through your hair tenderly. Almost too tenderly.

“You’re such a good girl. I didn’t think I would need to warn you,” he said. He wanted you to melt into nothing. Melt into his touch. Melt into his words. “I’ll go slow.”

Following a deep inhale, you shook your head. You whispered, “You can do whatever you want with me. I am a good girl.”

A soft laugh escaped from him before eagerly entering into you fully. You were biting your bottom lip at the filling sensation. The pleasure of his cock was encapsulating and overwhelming. 

“Fuck,” Peter grunted. You found yourself whimpering with each thrust. Despite your words and the fire in his eyes, he moved gently. You could feel yourself getting more and more acclimated to his cock, your wetness overflowing.

“You feel so good on my cock,” Peter moaned, his hips circling and hands wandering. You were tangled in his limbs. Your nails gripped onto his back for support. It reminded him of how much power he had over you. How easily he could break you. You wanted to encapsulate this memory into a shoe box of mementos and photographs. Being fucked by Peter was pure heaven.

The room was filled with his grunts and your moans. Your own control of your body was escaping you. Heat buzzed along your belly and your face until he took his cock out of you. A whine immediately left your lips. He was depriving you of the one thing you needed.

“Do you want it?” He breathed out. 

“God. Yes, Peter. I want it,” you were practically begging for him to put it back in. Instead, he latched onto your nipple, sending shivers across your neck. “Peter, please.”

Your slit felt empty and dripping in your own juices. You reached down to grasp onto his thick member but he grabs your wrists, placing them above your head. He was sucking on your nipple while his other hand pumped himself.

He was taking you for everything that you were. Your face was red with embarrassment, but your pussy twitched with need and you needed his cock. 

“I want your cock in me,” you panted, hips trying to catch him. Without noticing it, he was edging you. Brought you to euphoria just to interrupt your almost-firing nerves.

He continued to ignore you, his hands pumping his cock and his teeth rubbing against your sensitive breast. Any longer and you would be bruised with his mark.

“I want to make a mess on your cock.” You let out shamelessly, but fully breathless.

The satisfaction was written all over his face with eyes of fire. “God. If you wanted that, you should’ve just said that,” he grunted and rewarded you with his member. He entered you all at once, pushing his full length into you.

“Fuck!” You gasped.

Your blood rushed towards your core, muscles contracting around his warming cock. The pace naturally started to speed up, being thrusted by Peter had you moaning with no self control. His groans were jagged and loud. His passion was overwhelming. In place of rain, your skin was now drenched in sex and sweat. 

Your core started to clench as he pumped himself into you. Your nails gnawed at his rigid back. “I’m going to cum,” you whined.

Instead of continuing his pace, he got off of you. To feel his cock slide completely out of you left you speechless. You were gasping at the near ecstasy you were about to achieve. It felt so far away. He pissed you off.

Your back sank into the couch as his weight left you. Before reacting, you watched him as your pussy pulsed at the emptiness he left you.

He sat down, leaning his back on the couch. He patted his thigh, coaxing you.

“Cum all over this dick,” he said definitively before letting his head hang back. He knew the power he had. He knew you would listen to him. He was completely right. There was nothing you wanted more than to orgasm all on his cock.

You climbed on top of him, your hands resting on his shoulders. You could feel the presence of his cock beneath you. His shaded stare ate you up. He kept up a stoic face, almost like he was challenging you.

You watched his face as you lowered your body down on his cock, engulfing his tip only. 

“Good girl,” he whispered. Those words had you in a trance. His approval meant everything to you at the moment, but the stolen orgasm was still simmering in your belly. 

You licked your lips. You didn’t feel like a good girl right now. You wanted him to be a good boy.

You started to bounce up and down on his tip, ensuring to never let more than his tip in you. All the while you continued to study his face. He challenged you. He didn’t know this, but you don’t like to lose.

You didn’t let any of your control slip. Your face was rid of any excessive euphoria.   

He licked his lips, a small gesture of pleasure taking over him. You smiled tenderly at him as you slowed your hip movement. You glided on his tip, taking your precious time. You coated him generously with your wetness. This change of pace had his eyebrows furrowing together. 

“Fucking tease,” Peter said. His hands grasped onto your hips and with slight pressure, he attempted to bring you down on his cock.

A soft laugh came from your lips. You bowed your head down so that your lips were against his. You bit his bottom lip before dipping your tongue into his mouth.

“Be a good boy,” you warned him.

Once more, he laid his head back and watched you through hooded eyes. This time, instead of a challenge, his eyes said he was giving you all the power to use his cock.

“I’ll be good,” he licked his lips. 

You held his head between your breast. The soft aroma of his evergreen shampoo filled the atmosphere. Your nose snuggled his forest of hair. You let out a pleased moan shifting your hips slightly. “Good.”

Calculated and deliberate, you let your weight guide you down on him, his length filling you up more and more. The penetration felt so warm and comforting, sliding up and down on his cock felt just right. His face was smothered by your breast, his lips stuck to your flesh.

If you were more grounded, you would hear the pitter-patter of the rain on concrete and ceilings or notice how drastically dark it got in your apartment or how your soaking clothes were spread across the floor. But you hadn’t noticed any of this. You were too consumed with Peter’s moans, and the sound of Peter’s cock hammering into you, and the way you felt hot all over.

Before you knew it, words spewed out of your mouth. “Please cum in me, Peter.”

“You didn’t cum yet,” he said between kisses on your neck.

“I’m about to,” you mewled, your fingernails sinking into his skin

“You are?” he said with begging eyes.

“Please cum with me, Peter,” you managed to get out.

He wrapped his arms around your waist, holding you tightly. He started to thrust into you and use you like his very own sex toy. You couldn’t contain your voice. Your screams echoed in the apartment. With your fingers, you rubbed your clit gently as Peter penetrated you repeatedly.

“I’m going to cum on your cock!” you gasped.

Your fingers glided over your clit feverishly until you could feel the contractions in your stomach. You were moaning desperately at the long-awaited bliss.

You had came, but Peter was still hammering himself into you. Your pussy was throbbing with overstimulation. “Fuck, Peter. This is too much,” you cried out.

His pace persisted, and his grasp on you was resolute. 

“Peter!” Tears were coming to your eyes. Your nails were drawing blood and yet he continued. You were overwhelmed with pleasure. “Fuck!”

“I’m cumming!” He grunted, his thrusts turning slow and meaningful. You could feel his cum warm your belly up. His movement came to a stop and you laid your body onto him. Your body was slack. Tired. Your voice was hoarse. You could feel his cum overflow in you. Pitter patters of rain were gone.

“Good girl, Y/N,” he whispered.

> chapter two

a/n: hope everyone enjoyed it! i have loved fanfic since i was in middle school and that was a very very long time ago. :0 this is my first published fan fiction and i would appreciate all of the interaction i can get! 

xoxo scorpio mommy

[amywhereyouwant]

Some TOH HCs I wanted to share

There are a LOT of them, so They're under the read more for your scrolling convenience

Luz

-Uses She/They pronouns

-Would watch the entirety of Sword Art Online just to be able to shit on it properly

-Eats way too much Shredded Cheese even though she’s Lactose Intolerant

-Has made a Your mom joke to Willow only to remember she doesn’t have one

-Mains King in Tekken and made a custom attire trying to make it look like the other King

-Screenpeeks religiously in Split Screen Multiplayer

-Predicted Hecazura 2 books into the series, still won’t shut up about it

-Relatively known Digital Artist, her blog probably took off when she started making art of the Demon Realm 

-Hates baking

-Helps Amity bake out of the kindness of her heart(Also seeing Amity enjoying herself is really nice)

-Had a cold once, hasn’t had a Human Realm illness since

-Has SH scars from her depressed period back in the human realm(S3E1), still ashamed over them

-Quotes Memes constantly, only Hunter understands what she’s talking about

-Cracked a rib tripping on a rug on her way to bed

Amity

-Absolutely hates Bugs, like, genuinely despises them

-Does not know how computers work, but still tries to use Luz’s laptop to look up date ideas

-Can and will dress as the most stereotypical Witch ever

-Adopted(All 3 Blight Kids are in my HC)

-Likes to bake

-Does not know how to bake

-Gets sick constantly

-Works out a lot so she can help out with rebuilding the Isles(and also a little bit for Luz)

-Used to apologise a lot for minor things(Pre-timeskip)

-REALLY Bummed she didn’t get to see Titan Luz

-Watched the barbie movie the same day Gus watched Oppenheimer

Gus

-Goes nonverbal when stressed out, uses Illusions and his palisman to communicate

-Cried for hours when he finished the last Cosmic Frontier book, even though it was a happy ending

-Likes the idea of Professional Wrestling, but wishes the fights were to the death

-Quotes Cosmic Frontier as a Vocal Stim

-Dramatically perishes in Matt’s arms on the regular

-Headcanons O'Bayley to look exactly like Hunter just for the memes

-Thinks Human 2D Animation is the most beautiful thing to have ever been created

-Watched Across the Spider-Verse and Begged for Luz to draw a Spider-Suit for him, she did one for everyone

-Got really jealous when everyone else got flapjack tattoos, then he realised he could just make one of his own with an Illusion

-Got insanely mad when he learned about Human Discrimination(“How can you hate someone for something they can’t change? That’s ridiculous!”)

-Watched Oppenheimer the same day Amity and Hunter watched the Barbie Movie

Hunter

-LOVES Dino Nuggies

-Didn’t know Dinosaurs were real for a while until Luz showed them to him, Velociraptors are his favourite because “They’re like Wolves but Lizards!” (They’re not)

-Has a tumblr account where he posts about Wolves, Luz is his only follower

-Definitely has a Fursona

-Kicks Luz’s ass at most video games, except for Halo 2 specifically(I wonder why)

-”Will you go out with me?” “Hunter we’ve been dating for a year” “Oh.”

-Thinks Huggbees’ How it’s actually made videos are 100% Legit and honest

-Made Willow a Flower Shirt to match his Wolf Shirt

-Wears Willow’s Flower Shirt he made

-Imagine Dragons is his favourite band

-Has Epilepsy

-Steals Willow’s dresses sometimes

-Found Nicole Coenen on YouTube, showed her to luz “She looks kinda like Amity!”(Nobody else sees the resemblance)

-Probably plays a LOT of Roblox

-Watched the Barbie Movie with Amity(Luz forced him to)

-Has seen every single vine there is(Thank the Titan for Vine Compilations on YouTube)

-Any kind of facial hair he grows is really patchy so he just goes clean shaven for convenience

-Snuck food during TtT even though he was 100% allowed to eat normally

-Bananas do exist in the Demon Realm, Hunter has just never learned that they do

-Gets visits from the Spirits of the other Golden Guards in his dreams

Willow

-Tackled someone to the ground when they only slightly bumped into Hunter(We stan a protective queen)

-Feeds her palisman doggie treats, nobody knows why

-Filled Camila’s entire back garden with way too many plants during TtT, they’re still there despite not being watered for a while

-Made a Garland made of both Demon and Human Realm plants for Hunter on their anniversary

-Has no real idol/role model

-Happily Listens to everyone else ramble about their interests

-Wears Hunter’s Wolf Shirt

-Calls Hunter “Hun” as a short for his name, started doing it even more after she figured out what it actually meant

-Pranks people she doesn’t like by putting giant Grape Vines around their house

-Held a presentation about plant care for the Gravesfield Gardener Society

-Thinks most Human Sports are boring(Except for Hockey and Roller Derby)

Vee

-Pulls off some crazy ass cosplays

-Knows how to drive Camila’s car perfectly, still has no idea how it actually works though

-Laughed so hard she couldn’t breathe first time she heard Metal Pipe Fall Sound Effect

-Considers Luz to be her Sister, Camila burst into tears and hugged her when she called Luz “Big Sis” in front of her for the first time

-Plays Minecraft on Camila’s home PC, has spent tons of time on Hypixel and built a little shrine for the other basilisks on a private world

-Takes after Luz in a lot of ways

-Is way better at Spanish than Luz, flexes about it constantly(Nobody really cares)

-Had no idea how to tell Masha she was a Basilisk when they confessed to her(Masha knew long before she told them)

-Is really cuddly in Basilisk form, not so much when shapeshifted(“I don’t really feel like it’s myself”)

-Her first kiss with Masha was really awkward, she apologised like 45 times and cried because it wasn’t good

-Steven Universe is a canon IP in the universe, so she got really confused when Amethyst sounded EXACTLY like her

I have no idea why I made this

[voidsentprinces]

Think Bethesda's bugs of the past were charming and viewed as wonderful because they were growing up in the era where games looked like someone stuck one of those eye puzzles to the side of a granite mountain and models looks like someone had a vague recollection of what a dog or a person looked like but could only manifest them using cave moss and overtly watery 8 year old paint on models of soap and toothpicks. But as game graphics improved and the coding and development got more streamline and we began to expect better and more from Bethesda and they kept just delivering the same buggy messes they were. It became clear that no they were just bad and their job and like a department forgotten about in a merger being rediscovered by management 5 years later. People just started to wise up and wonder why that department was even there any more. I mean, we all remember Tom. He helped repair the office printer one time when we were three person team working out of an abandoned college dorm when we were starting up. But now that you're thinking back on it Tom was drunk that day and he didn't really help he just kicked it a few times and rattled something lose enough that it actually got free. And like, he was funny exactly one time. But now Tom shows up at the Office Christmas party every few years and tries to sell you on that moment that was kind of funny but over time has gotten dull and repeative. What I am saying is, Skyrim was hype but it was also hitting at the right time and the Bethesda glitches were funny then cause of the way internet was hooked into the lolrandom humor of the era. Like yeah, I am sure we all got a kick out of a dragon randomly falling dead from the sky on top of the cheese vendor. Or how giant attacks send you flying into the sky box. But like...that was over 10 years ago, it feels like a well polished game with only minor hiccups and bugs doesn't seem like a high bar anymore. It seems actually pretty damn standard to ask for that. And Bethesda is just like, "Skyrim...again...and Starfield...which is Space Skyrim...again..." I can feel the eyerolling.

I dunno where I am going with this but...like the next installment of Dragon Age. I don't think we should hold our breath on Elder Scrolls 6 to show its publisher putting its best foot forward.

[lesvegas]

Hey, Alex! Quick question, I saw your neopets post, and was wondering if the neopet site, as of today, is nice to play with.

Like, I´ve always thought of creating a new account (had one wayy back then), and all, but hearing about the fucking NFT shit, and how buggy half of the features where kinda discoraged me.

But seeing your post made me wonder if the new owners are improving the site experience, or the site wasn´t half as buggy as people said it was.

Yes!! I'd argue the site has been more nice to play with lately than it has been in the last couple of years since flash went under.

Funny thing about the NFT shit; TNT had nothing to do with it. TL;DR one of the og creators got obsessed with crypto shit, pissed his pants when no one wanted to do NFT shit, dipped, and now Neopets is independent and mostly owned by one of the other og creators who ISN'T a weird cryptobro. They've also stated that they have more resources, funding, and intend to take Neopets 'into a new era'.

So far, 'into a new era' has meant a restoration of many flash games and features (not all; it'll be a long while before everything is converted, but for most players only a few dailies are inaccessible and the site is still 95% functional), updating the home page and other areas of the site with a new mobile-friendly look (I'm kinda ambivalent about this but I get why they're doing it... and I have to admit I like the new themes), implementing a new plot event (I think it just ended but also looks like they aren't quite done yet, I'm excited to see what happens next) and... they apparently plan on making some kind of 3d game? Idk but for a while now they've been consistently updating and fixing and adding things people have wanted for a long time and seem to actually be listening to the community. They've been doing Q and A's on their official youtube channel, too.

I won't lie to you, though, the site IS still buggy. Always has been. I wouldn't say any bugs I've run into have hindered my experience overall, but they're there. But I might just be more forgiving of bugs than most as a fnv player lol. You *probably* won't really run into any yourself though, right now the only current bugs I can think of are the Wishing Well not updating and a couple minor bugs with the new plot event (tbf plot events are a live thing and they usually have a bug or two, this isn't new).

One last thing; going back to it for the first time in a long time will probably be jarring no matter what. Most of the site still has that classic oldish web look to it, while stuff like the front page and your inventory is in a totally different style. All I can say is you'll get used to it, but it does feel weird at first. Other than that, I can't really imagine a new account running into anything that would deter them from playing. Most of Neopets is the same as it's always been, for better or worse, and what isn't the same has mostly been a welcome change.

If you DO make a new account hmu btw I'll give you some free stuff and neopoints to start out with, I love helping newbies and returning players :3 Also lemme know if you have any other specific questions, I love talking about neopets sm

[bells-of-black-sunday]

2,5,7,12,15

Dbd Asks | Accepting

2. Favourite chapter?

So I've been playing dbd since a tiny bit before blight or a tiny bit after I can't remember, so I'm going to split it up into favorite chapter I've been at the release for and favorite chapter in general.

Favorite chapter release was probably Hellraiser, because I love the franchise so much and even with all the "making a mountain out of a mole hill" that went on around the chapter release, I fucking love his voice lines and I think he's a really fun and dynamic killer to play as and play against. (unless you're solo then he's kind of a solo stomper tbh) Though I am very well aware I am unique in that I love playing against killers that don't let me sit on gens and make the match more engaging like Wesker, Knight, Singularity, Pig etc.

Favorite chapter in general: Demise Of The Faithful. I fucking love the Plague, I love her design, I love her lore, I lover her game play, her cosmetics are fucking incredible, she genuinely is one of the killers that I am delighted to see every time I see one. I love Aldiris. Especially since they added one corrupted fountain, it was such a minor buff, but changed how you'd play her and play against her in such a positive way. Like how it went from basically being an m1 killer, because no one would cleanse to "Oh shit I actually have to think about when I want to cleanse now."

I think she has some really fun add ons that aren't just your usual buffing her power and genuinely she is such a fun strategic killer to play. She is both a set up and projectile killer and its so much fun, plus she came out with Corrupt Intervention that is a key perk for a lot of set up killers in the game currently. Genuinely if you've never played the plague would highly recommend, she has such a high skill ceiling and expression.

5. Favourite killer to play as?

Normally I'd say the Knight, but as I keep talking about, because it's come up a lot online this week from my own circles: he's is such a buggy fucking mess that you cannot play him. You play him and set down a patrol path just to get stunned by a pallet you're 50 feet away from because you ended your path near it, you can't use your power 90% of the time because you're "too close to an object", map of the realm is needed to get any use out of your guards 99% of the time, even then your guards move so slow they're never going to get a hit and their ai is so easy to trick, you have to sit in place to even use your patrol paths to break pallets or gens, so you're ultimately losing more distance than you gain 99% of the time you use it, etc. etc.

He has so many issues and it's past the point of frustration in playing him for me to just me being sad that I can't play my favorite killer, because he's virtually unplayable most games and this is after he was kill switched for 1 or 2 months. All of his bugs and issues remain the exact same, because of how poorly coded he is. Genuinely he is incredibly fun and interesting when I can play him, but to just be able to play him is a challenge in itself where you're fighting the game every 3 seconds.

7. What's a license you'd like to see added to the game?

Look I'ma be entirely honest with you all: I do not care about what license is added to the game. There's ones like f.naf where I'm like eh... I'd rather see a more deserving license added that actually fits the games style, but I genuinely do not care if they're added. (I mean this 100%: I hate S.pringtraps design, I'd rather it be V.anny or N.ightmarrionette if anyone is added)

I guess if I had to pick one though it'd be like The Thing or Outlast.

12. Favourite perk to use?

Old Blast Mine, no contest. I literally have no idea why they nerfed it, it was such a meme perk that had no real use to it.

15. Favourite chase music?

Legion, Oni, or Knight- I'm a slut for drums to be honest.

[soundofseclusion]

Pokemon Series Retrospective, Volume 3: Pokemon Crystal Pt. 1

After the break: a tale of frustration and a helping of full-on Pokemon Crystal spoilers with an explanation of why Volume 3 is only “Part 1″ of Crystal.

Background

I already established in Volume 1 (by the way, if you were confused, I retroactively made Volume 1 into the post about Yellow and the introductory post into Volume 0) that my history with Pokemon begins with a rough mish-mash of Gens 1 and 2.  Blue was the first game, but around the same time I was experiencing all of the first two generations.  Gold was the Gen 2 game I first played, but Crystal is the definitive version.  At least, it claims to be, and is in most respects.  I remember liking Crystal a lot, playing on the save file that a stranger made and being in awe of their level 100 Persian.  I remember trading that Persian to my Gold copy and experiencing first-hand the dreaded disobedience mechanics.  Regardless, the memories are fond.

I expected to go into Crystal in 2022/23 thinking that it was a step up in every way from Gen 1.  That it would be a game with only minor jank and that my memory of it being a superior experience to Gen 1 was correct.  What I actually found was that Gen 2 has new, worse problems.

Present Day

I write today having beaten the Elite 4 and the Champion in Pokemon Crystal.  The last month has tested my patience and made me question why I started this project in the first place.

To be clear, I don’t think Crystal is a bad game.  I actually think it’s a very good game.  But the experience of playing it can be agonizing.  Right off the bat, I’ll address the biggest issue I had with Gen 2.  It’s an issue I think Gen 1 also has going for it, but Gen 2 makes it worse.  Pokemon have very bad move pools, and learn their singular good moves at very high levels.  This is a game which expects you to somehow get a Donphan to level 49 with no ground moves before it learns Earthquake.  Parasect learns its only damaging grass-type move at level 55.  Barely any water-type Pokemon can learn all three water-traversal HMs, meaning you likely need two on your team unless you planned impeccably.

Basically, team composition is a nightmare.  This is a pretty big deal for a game series built around making a team that appeals to your play style and aesthetic preferences.  You go through so much of the game relying on a single Pokemon or using a very weak move on one Pokemon because the other moves are inaccessible.  It’s hard to even get all the Pokemon you might want on your team.  I struggled for about a week to get my Golbat to evolve into Crobat, and I went through several weeks with a Vileplume only to discover that getting a Sun Stone is fucking stupid (win the ridiculously strict Bug-Catching Contest), and that Leaf Stones are outright not purchasable.  I probably don’t even need to mention how many Pokemon are locked behind weird encounter methods or the post-game.  Or, in the case of the Mareep I wanted on my team, just not in this game!

...But other than that, I am still enamored with the story and world of Gen 2.  I enjoy the setting, I enjoy the world-building and lore, the pacing, the extension of NPC roles.  I enjoy the Gen 2 Pokemon designs and the introduction of good mechanics like breeding, held items, and the Special Atk/Def split (although the whole “type correlates to whether an attack is special/physical” thing is still kind of bad).  Gen 2′s music is where the series really picks up as having consistently great OSTs.  All the things that I remember fondly about Gen 2 with my rose-tinted glasses are still appealing and as impactful as I remembered.  I think Gen 1 might have a better story, but Gen 2′s world is much more fully realized.  It’s a more subtle approach to story-telling.

Finally, that brings me to...

Wait, Part 1?  Plus, Pulling Back the Curtain a Bit.

Yes, I’m going to do this game’s retrospective in two parts.  As you’re probably aware, Gen 2 allows you to go through Kanto after completing your Johto journey.  It’s a big game, and the post game is, like, half of the entire experience.  But I was worn out just getting to the point where I finished the Elite Four.  Like I briefly mentioned, I started to wonder why I was even subjecting myself to this Series Retrospective.

Full disclosure, the idea of wanting to play old Pokemon games arose from a desire to play Gen 4, 5, and 7.  I took it several steps further instead.  I still intend to play through mainline games in order, but in cases like this, I might do a game in multiple posts.  At some point down the line, a future volume will be titled “Pokemon Crystal Pt. 2,” and it will be a reflection on the other half of this game.

For some additional housecleaning, the original intention for this series was to play spin-offs around the time of the playthroughs of their respective Generations, i.e. Pokemon Snap around Pokemon Yellow.  I have decided to abandon that stipulation and just allow myself to skip to whatever spin-off I feel like.  I might play Pokemon Ranger next.

You’ll also see posts about fangames and ROMhacks in this “retrospective” series, which might seem a bit odd, but I think exploring what the fandom has created is also a big part of looking back at Pokemon’s history.  At least, that’s how I’d justify it if I had to.  The truth is I just want to include fan projects in this "marathon” because I really respect and enjoy the work of independent creators.

Closing Thoughts

Crystal is a mess, but it’s still superb and worth playing... although, I’d highly recommend the remakes over Gen 2 any day.  I look forward to taking some time away from Crystal so that I can come back to it with a fresh perspective and less frustration.  I’ll see you in the net volume with... it’s a secret!

[subterra-rose]

The bad bitch was me!!! Anyways thoughts under the cut, idc if it’s stuff that’s already been brought up in fandom bc I’m replaying this after 3 years and wasn’t active in it

I always forget how much I love Zagreus like… I love protags like him especially in games because seeing the changes in characters’ relationships just seem more… realistic? Like he’s nice, funny, yet earnest and pretty understanding? I’m still not 100% finished my replay yet so I might be forgetting stuff but he definitely seems like a character who’s overly sociable and energetic because he’s been isolated so long and feels as though he’s a failure in his father’s eyes. I think one thing that bugs me maybe a little bit is I don’t remember ever getting context for him actually going through Hades’ desk at the beginning? Like did he do it to spite him? Was he doubting his parentage already? Was he looking for ammunition to get more mad at? I don’t think it’s necessarily important that there’s a definitive reason because there’s already issues in their relationship, but it’s bugging me I can’t place why he was initially motivated to do it, especially if it’s plot relevant.

I think it’s funny how Thanatos says that Zagreus looks like Hades but has his mother’s eye(s). Like are you just saying this because you don’t really remember what she possibly looks like or are they actually that similar looking? Do you think other characters see him and see that resemblance bc idk if any other character really comments on that. They’re very obviously related but it’s just funny bc you see his CG next to hers and it’s like. That’s her baby.

I’m almost at the point of finishing Thanatos’ bond but I still… don’t really care for him ngl, even playing through a second time. I don’t think he’s a bad character or that he isn’t interesting, I just don’t have any strong feelings on him like, at all. I think a lot of my issues with his writing is that… I don’t like how he’s introduced because a lot of the past relationship dynamics between Zagreus and Thanatos just feels… idk, glossed over? Obviously there’s no flashback really of them growing up, but I think for me at least it’s really weakens how I’m supposed take this background information because Thanatos just shows up and is kind of standoffish in a way that just doesn’t intrigue me? He’s broody in a way that just feels…. Boring I guess lol

On the flip side, I love what they choose to do with Achilles because of how he’s handled in the traditional myths. It feels very natural because of what happens with Hector in some versions, so his character in the game feels like it was a good progression, especially with the sacrifices he’s had to make. Honestly I really love Patroclus too, I think he’s one of my favourite minor side characters

Meg…. Many thoughts about her but oughhhh, not to be a hater but I feel like a lot of the things I like about her character are similar to Thanatos but they were just more engaging in regards to her character? Like I said, I don’t dislike him at all but I think they were just handled in a way that was bland.

I’m still kind of confused on the handling of Hypnos because I really like him and he’s written to be kind of obnoxious, however I said this the other day but his initial relationship with Zagreus is kind of odd imo? I feel like it’s treated like they’re just acquaintances but if Hypnos is Thanatos’ twin, wouldn’t… he have be raised alongside Zagreus? Not that I think that means they would’ve been super close but it really pales when looking at some of the implications. It seems they were close enough that Hypnos would put the entire house to sleep for him, but then their conversations seem somewhat stilted in the beginning of the game like they’re not super familiar with each other?

Going crazy, need to talk to a bad bitch about Hades while Darien is at work

[prismit]

has anyone ever mentioned that the rotom bike is actually bugged? if something interrupts your speed boost, like talking to an npc or an egg hatching, then you keep the poor handling of the speed boost while going normal speed until you dash again.

[fandom-junk-drawer]

The Witcher Headcanon (Modern Au) - Error 404 Brain Not Found.

Yennefer has no clue how Geralt always ends up getting into odd situations when he's around Jaskier

The Witcher is usually so serious and disciplined, always on guard and watching so he's ready for any threat.

He is usually the responsible one, especially with Ciri.

But for some reason, when he's around Jaskier, Yennefer notices Geralt just kind of ...loses all his braincells.

Losing his braincells is normal for Jaskier, because sometimes Yen is convinced he never had any to begin with.

She wonders what is going on in their heads.

They are just living examples of Why Women Live Longer Than Men

Geralt and Jaskier haved jumped off the roof onto a trampoline. Geralt had been more concerned with the dent he'd put in the side of Roach than with his broken wrist.

They tried to see how many of various food items they could stuff in their mouths.

Run around the house wearing dinosaur masks, and if any mail or food delivery service knocks, they are greeted by two grown men in dinosaur masks, making hissing and roaring sounds.

Drank a big glass of water on an empty stomach so they could wiggle around to hear it slosh.

Tried to slide down the stairs in laundry baskets

Jaskier came home soaking wet because he took his motorcycle through the automated car wash while Geralt recorded it.

All the 'I bet you can't...' games that always ended with minor injuries.

Dared each other to eat random things they found while on hunts or outside, like slime, goo, viscous fluids, pasty goops, bugs, etc.

Made a swimming pool in the livingroom with the two couches and a tarp, filled it with orbeez, and stayed in there all afternoon watching tv and eating pizza rolls. Yennefer had made them find every last orbee after the 'pool' burst and flooded the livingroom thousands of little balls.

Giant Sticky Hand fights

Almost got arrested because Geralt and Lambert had seen Jaskier walking, pulled over, and shoved him into the van. People thought they were witnessing a kidnapping.

Naked Nerf Gun War. It hadn't ended well.

Hover board races in spite of the fact that neither of them had ever been on a hover board.

Have spent an entire day doing the Sprite Challenge. It ended only because Geralt made a sound like a dying humpback whale and they laughed so hard they both vomited.

Made horrifying concotions of various foods and liquids, then had a competition to see was brave enough to drink it.

Tried to epilate their leg hair because "how hard could it be?" The screams... The neighbors had called the police thinking someone was being murdered.

Invited Eskel, Lambert, and Coen over, then sat in a circle, took a mouthful of water and slapped each other in the face with a tortilla. The first one to spit their water out lost.

Made flamethrowers with cans of Yennefer's hairspray and lighters and chased eachother through the house. Yennefer had not been happy.

Spent almost and hour trying to see who could make the loudest, grossest sounding fart noise with their hands or insides of their elbows.

Tried to jump on the bed hard enough to make the other bounce off

Tried to see how many times Geralt could get kicked in the balls before he couldn't get back up.

Streaked down the street in broad daylight, and then couldn't get in the house because Lambert had locked them out.

Have to poke/throw firecrackers/try to burn every wasp, hornet, and ant nest they find. Jaskier's left hand had looked like a Mickey Mouse hand and he couldn't play his guitar for several days after he got stung by a "big a** motherf***ing hornet."

Then there was the time Jaskier somehow convinced Geralt to try on a pair of Yennefer's yoga pants.

How Geralt had even managed to get into them was a mystery. Yennefer had to admit that she was impressed with how well the yoga pants had held up. She couldn't even be mad.

And of course she had taken a picture.

Now every time Geralt calls her, that picture of him pops up on the screen.

And it's not even the full picture of Geralt. It's been cropped down to where it's just Geralt's a** in those gray yoga pants.

[astaroth1357]

Demigod MC Series: Athena

So. I have to deal with the virgin goddesses… By mythos, there really shouldn't ever be children of Artemis, Hestia, or Athena (yes, Athena was a virgin goddess). PJ got past that by making it canon that Annabeth and her siblings were born from cracking open Athena's skull (yes, that's also more or less the canon explanation). They gloss over it real quick but I remember, Rick. I've always remembered and that mental image has haunted me for years...

I can't, in good conscience, ignore the history around Athena's worship (call it an academic restraint) but I REFUSE to do the skull thing. So, since I make the rules here, I'm going with magic adoption. They still get magic powers, they're just more human than demigod. Cool? Cool.

Demigod MC Series: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus, Demeter, Athena

Lucifer

The human that popped out of the portal seemed to have enough sense not to attack everyone in the room for a change, but even Lucifer could tell that was more of a strategic choice than for lack of ability...

Their very existence was highly unusual… and quite worrisome. He wasn't even aware Athena could have "children" of her own, but apparently she had been taking in some particularly bright humans to raise and train like her own...

Unbeknownst to him, a surprising amount of human scholars, diplomats, and generals have her to thank for their trade… and that alone should speak to the level of intrigue at play here. 

Was this an accident or Athena's attempt to plant an Olympian spy in the Devildom too…? Either way, he didn't trust them from the get go…

Look, Lucifer isn’t stupid. Athena is a goddess of Wisdom and War and war happens on more than just the battlefield… 

Since they've shown up records have been going missing, official documents keep getting misplaced, and he swears that there's some kind of bug in the student council room...!

It's infuriating watching the MC suck up to Diavolo when he's almost certain that they're running their own agenda behind the scenes! And he can't prove any of it!! They cover their tracks too well!

Lucifer has one of those corkboards covered in newspapers and string in a secret wing of the Castle - 100% dedicated to just tracking the MC's activities…. The longer they're there, the more obsessed he becomes...

He swears between Simeon, Solomon, and MC he feels like a shepherd wondering why the sheep are growling… The Devildom has never been in more danger than it is right now... Send help.

Mammon

To be honest, he kind of thought that they were just going to be Satan 2.0 but that's not really true.

They're more than just a book sponge! Though they do read, like a lot. Let’s just say from one schemer to another… Game recognizes Game.

They come up with plans and ideas soooo fast, it’s insane! Honestly, there are times where he has a new money-making plot and he just brings it to the MC first to run it over. 

Nine times out of ten, not only do they sniff out any problems but they have a solution for him in a matter of minutes! His scheme game has been on point since they’ve shown up!!

They’re also even better tutoring than Satan is, so he’s even managed to get a couple A’s for the first time in his life! Lucifer actually told him he was proud (which he secretly recorded and now uses as a ringtone much to his brother’s regret...)

So yeah, he likes them... buuut that doesn’t keep him from thinking they act a little weird sometimes... 

Mammon: *points to a unused tower close to the RAD building* Over there is the Tower of Sorrow. We use it for storage.

MC: Ah. Interesting… *starts writing in a notebook, muttering* It may need a few minor tweaks but the location is defensible...

Mammon: *stops* Ya say somethin’?

MC: *looks back up* Nope! Say, you’ve been to the Castle a lot haven’t you? Do you know any good ways in?

Mammon: Uhm… Why do ya want to know that…? *starts looking around for Lucifer*

MC: In case of emergencies. I like being prepared. 🙂

Mammon: Look, I don’t know what Lucifer might’a told ya…

MC: I’ll pay you a thousand Grimm for it.

Mammon: Well shit, ya want those maps with or without color?

... Yeeeah, that’s pretty weird… But it’s probably fine. I mean, as long as they keep giving him money, who’s he to complain? 🤷‍♀️

Leviathan

Also thought that they’d be a lot more like Satan but was pleasantly surprised that they were into more than books.

What else did they like exactly? Military strategy!!

It’s been a looong time since he’s been able to talk to someone who’s actually interested in all the battles he’s fought, both in the Celestial Realm and the Devildom, and their curiosity is kind of flattering...! Not a lot of people take his strategic prowess all that seriously anymore...

Plus, they are the BEST partner to have any turn-based strategy game. Hands down. He once got stuck on a level of D-COM for weeks until the MC walked in and mopped the floor with the AI!! They have a serious head for probability and tactics.

The House once made the mistake of letting these two be on the same team during a Hell Game and they absolutely demolished the competition. Mammon didn’t even get a single shot off before half his team was lost to a rigged paint grenade… It took a whole day to clean up… 

However, Levi’s also noticed some odd things about the human… He likes that they’re interested in his past but maybe they’re a little… too interested?

Levi: -and that’s how we defeated the Four Horsemen before they escaped from Purgatory. 

MC: Wow, Levi that’s seriously impressive!! *furiously scribbling on a notebook*

Levi: Well t-thanks… 😅 But, uhm... are you writing that down…?

MC: Hm? Oh no, just doodling. *they lift up the notebook to show a bunch of cute little sketches on the page… and not the magic-based invisible ink all over them…*

Levi: Oh you draw too? Can you do fanart???

MC: Eh, sometimes. But say Levi, can you tell me about your naval ranks again? I’m still really curious… *gets the pen ready again with a smile*

Satan

Oh, it's been a long game of cat-and-mouse between these two… and unfortunately, it’s been pretty addicting too.

He honestly had every intention of tricking the human into making a huge mess do he could bother Lucifer, but at every turn they proved just a hair too clever for him...

He once gave them a cursed book to “lend” to Lucifer, but they saw through it the moment they touched it and lifted the spell before handing it over.

He rigged a podium to spray glitter during one of Lucifer's speeches but the MC disconnected the trigger mic before he even got on stage. It was pretty dang frustrating...

At one point he got so desperate that, just as a test, he tried to trap them in the House's Music Room. Fortunately for them, it only took a few minutes to work out an escape. They even passed by him in the hallway with a wink!

It's confounding! It's infuriating!! 

...and it's so damn sexy... He should be furious but he’s just in awe!!

Add on that they know their art, literature, and multiple different crafts thanks to the tutelage of their adopted mother and that’s it. He’s finished. This boy is in love.

Truthfully though, a part of him is 90% sure that they’re also gathering state secrets… Like, they’re watching Barbs and Diavolo far too close for comfort - but he just can't bring himself to care. 🤷‍♀️

The MC could walk into his room one day and say, "Hey, do you want to help overthrow the monarchy with me?" and he dreads it because deep down he knows that he wouldn’t say no…

Take some notes, kids. Some bad influences get you to drink or do drugs. Others pull you into a centuries long conspiracy to destabilize and topple rival realms from within… But he has fallen for their brain hard. Devil help them all…

Asmodeus 

They’re pretty clever, he’ll give them that, but uh… Are they a little off to anybody else?

Asmo is a charmer by birthright so he has a bit of nose for when someone’s just a liiittttle too nice… Not much of a nose mind you, because he can be thrown off by compliments himself, but enough to think that the MC might be a little too… “kind” for their own good...

First off, who wants to spend that much time with Levi?? They don’t even seem that interested in anime! They just keeping asking him for old war stories…

Then all the sucking up they do to Diavolo and Barbatos? Look, he gets it. Diavolo is a delicious piece of man-hunk and his butler could give him a lesson or two in sweet-talk (and he has), but they seem to be just a little too… nosy.

Of course, Asmo’s suspicions disappear pretty quickly after they start to spoil him with spa nights and beauty secrets they picked up from “casual research” into the subject.

And you know, get a little Demonus in Asmo and start massaging his back? Oh, sweetie he’ll sing like a bird!! … with gossip. Singing with gossip.

Asmo: So I’ve heard that Lucifer has been spending more time at RAD than usual… His whole club is talking about it, they think he’s meeting with some witch!

MC: Hm, is that so? *works on a knot near his shoulder blades* What do you think?

Asmo: Ooh~! Right there, MC! *purrs and lays his head on his arms* Well come on, this is Lucifer we’re talking about! I’m sure he’s just working.

Asmo: Hmm... though come to think of it, I think I heard him asking Barbatos for the spare keys to the Tower of Sorrow…

MC: Oh really? Huh. *works out the knot and gets up* I just remembered that I left some papers with Satan... I’ll be right back.

Asmo: You’re going already??

MC: *waves him off quickly* I’ll be right back, Asmo. *hurries out the door to do totally on-the-up-and-up things… surely*

Beelzebub 

Honestly he doesn't like this one… But not for the reasons you'd expect.

He agrees with everyone else that they seem a little shady, but Solomon and Simeon are too so it's not like that's anything new... 🤷‍♀️

No, no. He dislikes them because they're the person who FINALLY figured out how to keep him from eating all the food in the kitchen!!

Turns out that the trick was to put a teleportation charm on the fridge door that would send all the food away if it’s opened after a certain time of night… 

And where does it go? The Purgatory Hall fridge. And where does the Purgatory Hall food go…? The HoL fridge…

It doesn’t sound so bad until you remember that it means half of their fridge is now Solomon’s leftovers…. 🤢

After they put the same kind of spell on the pantry, it was all over… He couldn't get midnight snacks from the House anymore… Everything was contaminated by Solomon…

The MC is a nice enough person, he doesn’t have a lot of complaints about them, but he wants them to leave. Now. This is inexcusable… He’s so hungry… and he doesn’t want to die by “goulash” or whatever Solomon calls his latest culinary catastrophe… He’s still too young for death… 😓

Belphegor 

In a way, he absolutely could not have asked for a better person to help him get out of that attic.

… In another way, he got one of the worst possible people to try and kill... Like. They saw through his scheme sooo fast…

How was he supposed to know that the human had training in body language and sniffing out lies???

Getting the door open was a piece of cake for them. They knew enough magic to undo the seals and just rummaged around Lucifer's stuff long enough to find the key to the door. He could not have found a more competent individual for a break out, really.

It’s just… well he didn’t expect to go from locked in a room like a prisoner to tied up in enchanted rope, still like a prisoner but now mobile. 😑 

They even used his own hug ruse against him! They caught his wrists when they got close and tied him up before he could shake them off...

Admittedly, it wasn't exactly the best look for them either - what with walking Belphegor downstairs to the others like a one-man-prison-caravan but they're as silver-tongued as they are sly so they talked their way out of it beautifully… 

And like hell was he going to trust them after that!! And not even Beel liked them so something had to be up...

Well, you want a detective? Look no farther than Belphie (no seriously, it’s in the canon). He can put things together pretty fast when he puts his mind to it and watching the MC for a while gave him enough proof to work off of...

He always knew that, humans were bad news and the MC just proved it to him all over again. They are bad news, bad bad news and they’re going to-!

Overthrow… Diavolo…? Is that what he is getting from them…? Huh…

Wait a second, MC. You might just have him interested… 😏