#it's just bittersweet knowing what it could have been vs. what we got

[americankimchi]

the way im sitting here thinking about how i wouldve rewritten veilguard in a way that's feasible wrt worldstates + actually shipping the game out in a realistic timeframe.... i'm fully sympathetic to the game devs because the thought of having to integrate three entire games of branching choices is a daunting prospect even from a narrative standpoint, nevermind figuring out how to express it in a game. there's no way i can think of where the end result would've been satisfactory to everyone, so i can understand from a purely practical standpoint why they did what they did for veilguard.

that being said:

i seriously disapprove of the way that everything done pre-veilguard was wiped off the face of thedas. like, sure, keeping track of minutia that has no bearing on the story beyond the moment itself is kind of stupid. like why would my rook care if the HoF reclaimed king cailan's armor. that makes no sense. but including the extremely pertinent world history defining events wouldn't have been too big a stretch, and honestly should have stayed in the game. it gives the world depth. it gives the world life. for example establishing whether the HoF survived via dark ritual vs. went down in a blaze of glory during the 5th blight, ritual be damned, seems kind of pertinent, especially in a game dealing with the consequences of the blight. i didn't expect or even want a cameo of the HoF, but perhaps a single nod via codex entry (or throwaway voice line from morrigan) to the game that kickstarted the ENTIRE franchise isn't outside the scope of expectations when crafting a sequel to it.

honestly i think the way they handled the hawke vs. corypheus situation in inquisition was the perfect solution to it. there was a significant portion of those who played da2 that didn't bother with the dlc prior to playing inquisition and were baffled when that connection was established in game. the 'default' state of inquisition was that hawke fought corypheus. why didn't they just do that for veilguard?

like yes, having a 'default' worldstate would've rankled feathers, but it's a significant improvement over not having one at ALL.

"but cindy," you might say, "we did have worldstates. we got to pick the inquisitor's appearance, what they did with the inquisition, who they romanced, and their intentions wrt resolving the solas situation!"

yes, that's true. and the only impact those choices had was a few lines of dialogue here and there. flavor text. pretty pathetic to reduce a 70+ hour game to just a few lines, but at least it was something. which is why i don't understand why they didn't do the same for dao and da2. it's stupid to expect a cameo from both the HoF or hawke and honestly if that happened i'd be pissed because it would be stealing the spotlight from rook in favor of shoehorning in nostalgia bait, but letters? codex entries? lines of dialogue? all fully doable. if they wanted to take down the keep, at least reinstate the 'default' worldstate where the dalish warden died in dao. we KNOW it exists. why not just reuse it?

ESPECIALLY since the main antagonist in veilguard is solas. he has so much guilt tied to the blight, the elves, and the veil. there's such a rich opportunity for story telling there and i genuinely cannot believe they didn't attempt to bring it up even once.

OR the conflict between the mages and the templars, a massive mainstay from all three previous games... just done away with? not even a footnote? there are some people who don't even know what a circle is, through no fault of their own! the game doesn't take the time to establish crucial pieces of world lore! and for what? do first-time players even know what a divine is? andraste? arlathan and tevinter and the bloody history therein?

they don't need to rehash EVERYTHING, but why on earth does the fourth entry in a video game series feel so disconnected from the previous three? if that was going to be the case, why not just set it even further in the future, after solas has already won and the veil is torn down and history matters only in that nobody remembers it anymore?

a post-apocalyptic version of thedas where the worldstates prior to solas tearing down the veil doesn't matter because that thedas doesn't exist anymore. that would've satisfied me. it would've been a bitter satisfaction, but i would've understood it. who cares who rules orlais if orlais no longer exists?

genuinely i don't understand why they made dragon age veilguard the way they did. it's like they tried to do a remake before the original version was even out. who was this game even made for? first-timers, obviously, as the game itself is enjoyable from a purely fantasy game perspective, but as the latest installment in a series that started in 2009? really? where did all that history go?

it's funny, because at the end of veilguard the only choice that really has any staying power is the one about solas. i can't think about any other decision made that would have any tangible effect on any sequels. on the world, i mean. characters are another story.

anyways, long story short: i hope they're a little more respectful to long-time fans in the next one. if there is a next one. i hope there is, but i won't hold my breath.

[mythalism]

the timing of someone apparently shitting on me for being a veilguard hater on some remote corner of tumblr is so funny because i was actually just in the shower like an hour before listening to the atonement ending suite and thinking about the things that i love about veilguard after almost 2 months of marinating on it, so apologies for destroying my reputation as a certified HATER!!!!!!! but i actually wanted to share these earlier so im still going to. i think its interesting especially because ive seen a lot of people that hate these same things about the game, but my opinion has stayed the same. its also interesting because OVERALL the more i think about veilguard the more i dislike it, but for these certain aspects, the more i think about them the more i love them.

THAT FUCKING SONG!!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!! even two months later i get choked up listening to it. and guys....... i dont listen to lost elf anymore. like i just dont even think of it. thats not to say trevor morris isnt the greatest of all time, and the atonement ending song relies heavily on lost elf. i know. but my favorite parts of the atonement song are not even lost elf!!! overall i missed trevor deeply, i did not like the veilguard soundtrack. i even turned the music volume to 0 at some points because it felt like nails on a chalkboard to me (ghilannain fight music made me want to d*e). HOWEVER. this is supposed to be positive. and if you ask me to choose lost elf vs atonement theme... im choosing atonement theme. every time. the way it adds to lost elf is wonderful. it gives me chills. it is so haunting. i will never tire of it. I LOVE THIS FUCKING SOOOOOONG. i also love the dread wolf song. so honorable mention to that one.

i love the solavellan ending. i know people hate it but nothing i have seen has convinced me to abandon my love for it. it is the best ending we could have possibly gotten in a game where the veil stayed up. and yes obviously i think the veil should have come down. but my IDEAL ending would have been veil down, rook takes over the mantle of dread wolf, solas and lavellan give up their mortal bodies and become spirits together and ascend to the fade. and honestly thats pretty much what happens, just without the veil. i love the mythological fairy tale vibe. i love the bittersweetness. i love that it is both tragic and hopeful. i love that it is vague enough to leave the future open. i love that the devs refuse to confirm where exactly in the fade they are. i love the sigyn loki eros psyche parallels. i love the maker and andraste parallels. could it have been built up to better? absolutely. but thats an issue with the build up, not the ending. i thought solas was going to die and we were going to watch the light go out of his eyes as lavellan held him and sobbed. it is so much more hopeful than i expected. i love that we get to redeem him through the power of love. i love that lavellan forgives him. i love that they survive. I LOVE IT!!!! and i love it the more i think about it. ive tried to hate it because i understand the perspective of people who didnt like it, but i literally cannot make myself dislike it.

i love the solavellan ending scene itself. i love how inky creeps in through the door. dont ask how she got up there its fine. i love how she sneaks up on him. i love that she comes up those stairs and it parallels the prologue scene with varric. i love that she has a zinger ready for him. "even if those you have wronged asked you to stop?" oh its so fucking good. i love his pathetic defeated "vhenan". i love that he rejects her again. i love that he apologizes but stays true to his goals. i love that it takes something beyond lavellan and the modern world to finally crack him. i love the way he looks at mythal like a kicked puppy. i love the way he cannot meet her eyes. i love the way he crumples and sobs and we see a completely different side of him that I NEVER FUCKING EXPECTED TO SEE IN A MILLION YEARS???? i love mythal's coldness and frankness as she releases him. i love that she doesn't apologize. i love how fucked up and messy it is. i love how it speaks to their entire relationship being fucked up and messy. i love that it has given me so much to chew on about what the fuck was going on with them. i love the way lavellan kneels so she can see his face. i love that she speaks in elvhen (even if the translation leaves something to be desired). i love that its all in the hallelujah cadence. i love that he assumes she wont come with him. i love that she has to chase after him one more time. i love his fucking tear mesh. i love his face when he looks at her. i love that their scene is wedding coded. i dont love the kiss but im trying to be positive and its tiny in the grand scheme. i love her hand on his shoulder as they step into the fade. i have a few complaints about the scene but none of them are enough to cheapen my enjoyment of it.

i fucking love fragment mythal. obviously. but seriously. i love the scene where you get her approval its one of my favorites in the entire game. i love that its hard to get her approval. i love that she fucking kills you if you piss her off. i love her lines. "after he killed the swamp witch. AND WEPT." BITCH!!!! and "you are a thousand years from knowing the correct words" or whatever. I LOVE HER. i love how fucking nasty she is. i love how she has clearly been stewing in resentment for thousands of years. i love that she is rude and proud and haughty. i love that she'd be looking down her nose at you if she wasn't like 5 ft tall. i love the way she falls backwards off the ledge with her arms out and closes her eyes to transform into a fucking dragon. i love her condescension. i love the decapitated wolf statues in the background. i love the note from felassan that reveals solas made her an entire island for herself. i love that she reveals that he put her there. i love that he could not bring himself to visit her even once. ohhhhh my god it makes me dizzy. talking to her was a moment where the game felt like dragon age to me.

i love my lavellan in this game. did i want WAY more of her? yeah. and i expected more. but every moment we got i loved. the first scene with her is mostly whatever its appropriately formal for her meeting a stranger. but the way she stutters when talking about solas? when asking rook to give him a chance by using the wolf statue to learn more about him? the way she looks down and to the side as she says it? banger. masterpiece. the act 3 conversation makes me have to lay down. i can barely even talk about it without foaming at the mouth. i love her characterization. i love that she orders rook to tell her something like she has gotten used to the power of her title as inquisitor. i love her subtle desperation to have her hope for him validated cloaked under her inquisitor mask. i love how it begins to crack as the conversation goes on and she gets lost in the memories of him. i love her sincerity. i love the way she speaks bluntly and unapologetically of her love. i love her facial expressions and her furrowed brow. i love how confident and self assured she is. "or maybe im the prideful one, imagining his broken heart so that i do not have to face my folly; that i loved someone who made such terrible mistakes. that i might love him still" IS MY FAVORITE LINE IN THE ENTIRE GAME. perhaps. PERHAPS. in all of dragon age. yes im serious. its that insane to me. it feels like shakespeare wrote it. im only half kidding. i was rolling on the floor of my bedroom when i heard it. it still gives me chills. i love that her lines are in the hallelujah cadence. i love the way she talks about their relationship. i love how she is angry and indignant about his lies to her but that does not infringe upon her love. i love when she says "how could i have fallen in love with a god and not known? why didnt he tell me?' i love how sure she is that she knows the true solas. i love every word out of her mouth. i love all of it. that is my favorite scene in the game. i love when she shows up with dorian in the end. i love "is there any chance, any chance at all that he'd listen to reason?" i love her face when she says it. i love "speaking from the heart, inquisitor?" i love when dorian asks if shes heading out afterwards and she says "something like that" BE SOOOO FRRRR. SHE WAS FUCKING SCHEMING. there was not a moment that she was on screen that i did not love.

overall, i am happy with solas in this game. this one is last because its the weakest because i do criticisms but overall, i think it was fine LOL. my biggest worry was that they were going to completely woobify him and make him above reproach and erase the negative sides of him in favor of making him MORE sympathetic to new players. the fact that we got the opposite is crazy, but i vastly prefer it. id rather have him be too villainous than robbed of his complexity to be more palatable. that would have fully ruined the game for me. so the fact that we got to see him being an absolute prick little shit who betrayed us TWICE was wonderful. i loved being betrayed. i love the scene where he puts rook in the regret prison. i LOVE how he appears behind rooks shoulder in flashes and the player can see him but rook cant. i love how he circles rook like prey. i love how he does that cunty little thing with his hand over the dagger. i love that he taunts rook. i love that he doesnt actually take the dagger from them and instead waits for it to fall into his hand. its so immortal trickster god. i love that fucking scene. i love the "by my hand" line and how he looks you in the face as he manipulates his words so expertly. i love his banters with the companions. i looooooooved listening to him beef with elgar'nan. it felt so HIM. i was like YES!!!! THIS IS THE DREAD WOLF I WANTED TO MEET!!!! i was screaming during that quest. anyway. i wanted more of him. yeah. i dont really care that much that the companions and general story is weirdly unsympathetic to him. because it obviously didnt work!!! LMFAOOO 72% people still decided to redeem him so whatever! hes still pookie. im just so glad they didnt make him boring and lame. all my issues along this vein revolve more around the veil than solas, so i consider it a separate issue. i loved seeing mean nasty cunty trickster god.

ok in retrospect this list isnt that long KJHREGKJERG. however all of these things are very important to me so the fact that i love them is essential. like i truly got what i needed out of this game. i criticize it a lot but i would have done that even if the game was a 9/10 for me. i do it to literally everything i love. except fmab because its above reproach. but literally everything else. i was writing essays criticizing the percy jackson books on tumblr when i was 15. i have been criticizing dragon age online for 5+ years. veilguard aint special in catching my heat. critical analysis is in my soul. anyway i wanted banger solavellan ending that i could chew on for years and i got it. thats all i needed! ok now going to go listen to atonement ending suite again and transcend into the astral plane

[patcaps]

had some more time to think, and i want to make it clear that i’m not actually disappointed that alison and mike left. yes, initially it felt a bit jarring considering the end of 5x06, julian’s speech, deciding to stay, loving it there etc etc. i also couldn’t imagine the ghosts being okay with the hotel but then i reconsidered and thought of how they’d get over it, realise what perks it has, be nosy and interested as always, and know they had proposed it for alison’s sake. sure it would have been a dream if they could just stay all together and compromise on space, but i suppose the whole point of it was family are sometimes just a bit shit at that however well-meaning and the only solution is to get some space from them. mike’s mum was there to hammer that point home, even if i think it was rushed. and i moved out of my family home a few years ago so i know all this to be true, i visit my family all the time and that space apart doesn’t stop you being family, of course it doesn’t.

alison and mike had to put their needs first and prioritise attention to mia, rather than what the ghosts want to watch on tv or turning pages of books, and it is very in-character of the ghosts - who have grown so much thanks to alison - to be the ones to propose they leave. it was also lovely to see that they kept their room and visited into their old age. all of that is tonally very on-brand with the idiots and their work.

my gripes come from the pacing, which is so hard to do in 30 minute episodes but something i feel slipped in s5 particularly - time spent on certain things that could have been better allocated elsewhere. and i just would have liked a little bit more weight on the goodbye, maybe, let it linger a bit. of course you can then argue that, well, it wasn’t really goodbye, just see you later, but still. end of an era and all that. do we really need to see what the interim was like, what they did? no, we can infer that, it’s the same old alison and her ghosts they would always be. i just wanted literally another few minutes with them as they were. idk if that makes sense.

i thought it was weird that alison so readily agreed, but then it’s like, well maybe she knew it was just time. they all knew but she wanted to keep them all a bit longer, hang onto that dream. the ghosts being the ones to encourage her to go rather than hope she’d stay was the final push she needed to accept things finally were going to change. everything changes. the ghosts know that more than anyone because they’ve seen so much of it.

i did absolutely love the parallels of them leaving vs arriving, alison’s outfit and the car on the drive. so many shots were call-backs to the first episodes and i loved that dearly as a bookend.

ultimately, the ghosts weren’t forgotten and they didn’t get sucked off. they were visited for decades, got to have loads of new experiences with a hotel no doubt, got to watch alison and mike’s kid(s) grow.

i have a lot of feelings and it was bittersweet and imperfect in places but ultimately it was one of the kindest endings they could have given everyone bar alison and mike simply just staying, which in the long run just wouldn’t have been viable.

fuck. ok

[exo-raskreia]

How is Gege going to wrap everything up in 5 chapters?! There are still a bunch of questions, things to be resolved:

• Gojo's comeback?! (I've believed in his comeback since 236 cuz there's been hint after hint! Or else, worst character death & I'll forever be salty about it 😠)

• Utahime's potential role in that or something equally important?! (Gege's really wasting her like that?)

• Nobara comeback?! (What about Uta buffing her Resonance against Sukuna's finger?)

• Hakari vs Uraume?! (At this rate, Gege better not waste time on it OR watch him make Hakari offscreen or one-shot/finish off Uraume in a few panels 💀)

• What's gonna happen to Yuuta in Gojo's body?! (He better not stay stuck there—this could ruin YutaMaki—nor die...)

• The Merger?! (Watch Gege kill everyone off & reincarnate in a diff life 💀)

• Kenjaku really died like that? No backstory, his relation to Tengen?

• Tengen backstory?

• Sukuna backstory? No glimpse into the Heian Era?

• Kashimo really just died like that? He didn't even last 💀

• Did Higuruma really die?

• Where are Gakuganji & Ijichi? Are they potentially helping Uta?

• Will Megumi live to find out about Toji like Gojo wanted him to?

• Was Shoko really as uncaring as she seemed towards Gojo & the Horrible Plan? Didn't she want to let him know she's always been there for him?

• The military subplot? (What was the point?)

There's just so much to be concerned about. It's gonna be rushed & bad at this rate. This is Bl3ach all over again 🙄 (a "timeskip married with kids ending" would be the cherry on top... 😒)

I wouldn't be surprised if Yuuji dies along with Sukuna 💀. Or as others have said before, what if Megumi sacrifices himself to bring back everyone—his DE mudra is that of Yakushi Nyorai (Healing Buddha), & his shikigami seem to represent the Ten Sacred Treasures that can resurrect the dead? But still... 😥

If the Merger happens, kills everyone off, & they all reincarnate, my idea for at least a bittersweet ending is that all the adults become teachers/staff in a high school & the kids are the students. Imagine Gojo as a science teacher or counselor or smth, Utahime as the Japanese or choir teacher, Yaga the principal, Shoko the school nurse, Sukuna a sports coach (lol), etc. We could even have a scene of Gojo going to tease Uta in her class, implying GojoHime hasn't changed; and the students go "They're flirting again". 😭

If the Merger doesn't happen, can we at least get a scene of Utahime being pregnant with Gojo's child or showing her with a baby that looks just like him in the future 😭? They were either in a secret relationship the whole time or they got together during the timeskip...

I highly doubt there'll be a sequel or that the final chapters will be longer but who knows. Gege just seems like he's been wanting to end JJK for a long time... Wouldn't be surprised if he releases another fanbook to fill in some of the plot holes 🙄. There's a bunch of things in the manga that I'll forever feel critical about, & I once made a post on it here.

Anyway, we'll see what happens. I shouldn't trust Gege at this point but he might still deliver somehow. The 4th character popularity poll results are coming up with a color spread. Wonder if Utahime went up a rank...

There's also GojoHime's 200% Hollow Purple to look forward to in the anime... 🥹

[fatuismooches]

Oof this is a very late ask considering that the topic has gone by already but going back to the whole "Are we together in every universe?" scenario

So we already had the what-if of Dottore meeting his alternate self who didn't meet the reader, and reader got to react to that.

But what if it's the other way around? What if Dottore meets an alternate version of his darling, what would he feel?

Would he feel slight unease? Because this person looks and sounds like his dear, but they're by all accounts - a stranger.

Would he try to talk to them? If he could get away with it, start examining them? Recording the body measurements, checking general health to see if this version is sickly, just start poking and prodding at everything in search of differences.

And if that version is not sickly, what then? Would he just keep them around for observation? Try to figure out why this version is healthy while his lover is frail?

Would he treat the other version any different? Would he feel the same responsibility of care, or would he be... cold? What of the segments? What would they do?

So many avenues with this idea! It could go from angst (Dottore uses the other version to save his lover) or bitter-sweet (Meeting what reader could have been. Healthy, but doesn't know him)

DELICIOUS VERY DELICIOUS ANON!! I believe Dottore meeting an alternate version of you would be a battle of his rationality vs his emotions/irrationality. Rationally, he knows it's not his you, this new version of you does not belong to him, he knows nothing about this alternate you, so he holds no attachment to the other you. Irrationality, although there are obvious differences between your two selves, his keen eye can still point out the similarities - laughs, smiles, habits... it does remind him of Teyvat's you.

But it is as you said. Sure, this person may be similar to you, but it's not you. It's not the [Name] he loves, not the one he swore to protect and cure. He's selfish, very much so, he's not a good person, and if... 'examining' this other you that landed in his hands could potentially lead to a breakthrough in his research to cure you, then he will do it. Will he feel a twinge of pain, seeing how similar your face and tears are to his you? Yes, but as long as he knows that his you is safe and sound, he'll proceed.

Because at the end of the day, he'll pick you, the you that's been with him for centuries. If you're with him, alive and well, then he could care less about an alternate universe's version of you. As harsh as that sounds, all he cares about is his you and your well-being.

Also, the alternate version of you would simultaneously anger him yet reassure him. Anger him because of out all the universes, the Gods chose this one to inflict this illness on you? The one where he happened to be in? Reassure him because this means there's hope in curing you, if there are universes where you are not sick.

*cough* Moving on from that, going the bittersweet route, perhaps he can only see the alternate you and not physically interact. He can see how delightfully happy you are, no illness to worry about, living out your dreams and best life. From that, Dottore can only hope that he makes that reality in this universe as well.

[drakaripykiros130ac]

I’m sorry to blow up your asks, but I wanted your opinion since I know you don’t like HOTD’s adaption of F&B.

What do you think about the way they handled Laena’s death? I’ve seen people argue that they prefer the book and the shows versions for different reasons. For me, it was one of the changes in the show that I actually liked over the original.

They not only showed the difference in Daemon and Viserys’ character with the way Daemon refused the c-section after learning Laena wouldn’t survive it vs Viserys saying to do it, but we also got to see Laena die on her own terms (as much as she could given the circumstances). She asked Viserys about Vhagar as a child and eventually bonded with the dragon she yearned for, and I find it bittersweet that she was able to go out in her own terms by the dragon she wanted so badly. Not to mention the symbolism in it; she knew she would be buried at sea like a Velaryon, but she was also able to have a dragonrider’s death with Vhagar like a Targaryen.

(Disclaimer: I am talking strictly about her death. I could write an entire doctoral thesis about the way they slaughtered Daemon and Laena’s relationship and the relationship they had with Rhaenyra, and Daemon’s character as a father to his children.)

I personally greatly dislike how they had Viserys make that decision for Aemma. It wasn’t like that in the book. Aemma Arryn died in childbirth period. Viserys had nothing to do with it.

As a side note, the showrunners have made plenty of decisions to make Viserys and Daemon look bad through the way they treat women (it wasn’t like that in the book).

As for Laena’s death, while the show version is definitely more epic, I think that it was executed poorly. I mean, Laena, while giving birth, barely able to move and in tremendous amount of pain, manages to move past all those people in the room and get to Vhagar? There’s seriously no one who saw her leave? And how could she just leave? Normally, she shouldn’t have been able to move.

Overall, the showrunners choose epicness over good sense.

[thefinalsnart]

Top 5 Link moments 👀

OH STELLA WHERE DO I BEGIN. I genuinely thought this would be easy but I had to go through and double check so many chapters, I ended up with double the amount of scenes and had to narrow it back down to just 5.

I haven't read the latest chapter yet but I know he's back again, so this might just have more tacked on later LMAO.

5. Link Fighting the Akuma in Hearst Orphanage

This was maybe the first time we got to see what Link could do, and where I really started to go "Now, who is this guy?" He only gets a couple licks in, but what he did for a 'civilian' was so impressive. I went with this page because the kick is just so incredible, and I love him talking about being a CROW-- "I have black wings." Love love love this whole scene.

(Also just before this, he carries Emilia and Timothy over his shoulder and jumps down a whole flight of stairs. That I didn't really remember until looking for these panels, but GOD does that really do it for me. Mr. Link please carry me over your shoulder like a bag of four.) 4. His 'Last Words'

I don't have a lot to say about this one. I love how Link can be a little sassy on occasion, and I just love his bitchy smirk as he delivers his 'last words.' His death CRUSHED me, but I can't lie he really served here.

3. His Backstory and the Thirds

I love love love not only Link, but the Third Exorcists as well. I wish we got to know more about them all. This also felt like such a sweet, rare little moment of Link opening up to Allen for once. Allen has talked to Link about Mana a bit at this point, but Link is still such a mystery. But it's also bittersweet! Kiredori and Goushi are dead, and they haven't a clue as to Tewaku, Tokusa, and Madaro's fates... In the pages before this Link has extra lines under his eyes, has he been sleeping? Has he been crying? I just love him so much. I hope someone asks about the Thirds in a discussion room one day so we might learn more about them and Link.

2. Link's Inner Conflict

First of all, this page is GORGEOUS. His expression, the tattoo in full view. But I love this scene because we start to see some more character development in Link. He's always been one to follow orders, and we see him wrestling with these decisions and the consequences they might have. He wants to save Allen, but Lvellie is pulling him to Nea. Who will he choose? I just love a character whose faith gets challenged. What are you going to do Link?

1. Link's Return from the Dead

Alternatively titled "Link's First Smile." I lost my MIND when he was revealed to be alive. And then he shows up in thigh highs and a slutty little turtleneck? The audacity. But what I love about this is that he's smiling. Even if it's just a ruse for Kanda, this is one of if not the first time we see Link smile? In one of the discussion rooms I believe Allen comments on how he always tried to get Link to laugh or smile, but he never could. As much as I love this scene, truly a Cunt vs Cunt moment, it also stresses me out so much. Link what do you have planned? Where will this lead him? Will you ever be free of Lvellie? Do you even want to be free of Lvellie?

He tortures me. I love him so much and he tortures me!!

Bonus: I'll leave you with Link's sexy little Artificial Exorcist Arc outfit

Also thank you so much to the website d-gray-man-manga for all the pages! I went through their translations/scans to jog my memory and grab these panels.

[nixknacks0-0]

Thank you for writing "Bittersweet Reunion"! I enjoyed it immensely and it has definitely found a place on my list of all-time favorite Roudise stories! And thank you for offering to answer readers' questions about it! Here are a couple (hopefully, not too many) I've been wondering about:

This is really basic, and possibly it was mentioned in an earlier chapter and I just don't remember, but what age are Louise and Rudy supposed to be in the story?

I would love to know where you got the idea for the story from or what inspired you to write it? As I mentioned in my comment on the last chapter, to me Louise and Rudy feel like the least likely of the Belcher kid friendships to fall out of each other's lives, so I'm curious what led you to think of a story starting from the premise.

In the second to last chapter, Rudy explains that reason he left town was because he needed to get away from his parents. I know you started the story well before "The Amazing Rudy" aired and I was wondering if that episode- where we see Rudy's mom for the first time and see more of his relationship with his dad- changed your view of his relationship with his parents or led you to change anything about how that part of Chapter 11 was written? (Of course, there's all sorts of things that can happen in parent-child relationships between the ages of 9 and 18 that could explain why older teen Rudy would feel the need to get away from them.)

I loved the way you wrote the older Pesto twins in Chapter 3! I find the Pesto twins to be the hardest characters to imagine aged up versions of (I actually decided not to write a scene with them in it for my Roudise wedding fic when I realized I was still writing them like they were 9). I was wondering how you came up with the ideas you did for them and if you had any additional ideas for them that didn't make it into the story?

Similarly, where are there any ideas for any of the other background characters that you weren't able to work into the story but would like to share? (Feel free to ignore if this will spoil other stories you are working on.)

Thank you for reading it, and I'm so glad you enjoyed it! And don't worry, I'm happy to answer all the questions (⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ ⁠)

1. Louise and Rudy are in their early to mid 30s in this. I really wanted to capture the vibes of people can find love at any age (vs Gene and Tina who in this au find love in college and right after).

I also wanted to emphasize that Louise has a very established life at this point, she's taken over the restaurant, she has friends and weekly hang outs, she isn't necessarily looking for anything romantic to happen, but sometimes it happens anyways.

I just think it was interesting to explore a budding relationship between two people who very much know who they are, as opposed to younger people just figuring out who they are in life.

2. This story actually started with me thinking about how I really wanted Louise to take over the restaurant when she's older, and things kind of grew from there.

Another thing I really wanted to explore is this sort of abandonment issue Louise has. That's not quite the words for it, but I always got the vibe that she cares so strongly for the people in her life and hates when they have to/choose to leave, which ended up being a really interesting dynamic to explore when coupled with her figuring out she's in love.

3. Rudy's parents seemed to me the easiest vehicle for his moving away. We've seen how Sylvester acts (even though he cares, he obviously has his own problems, as illustrated in the House of 1000 Bounces and The Kids Rob a Train), and in earlier episodes Rudy talked about his mother caring very strongly about his safety and "hating fun".

Obviously that seems to change as the seasons go on, and especially with The Amazing Rudy. I did consider changing the story at that point, but why Rudy left was kind of woven throughout the story, and I realized that it's fanfiction. It doesn't have to be 100% accurate to canon, and the story probably wouldn't be 100% accurate even if I did change it.

I did love seeing how much his parents actually care in The Amazing Rudy, and I think it was a really great episode to analyze the inner workings of our favorite asthmatic boy.

4. My portrayal of the Pesto twins is 100% inspired by @tallgirl14, whose work I saw on TikTok. She's got some really great comics of the kids in high school, and she illustrates the twins as these sort of trouble makers because anyone who is friends with Louise for so long has to be a little crafty.

I sincerely recommend you check out her work, her art is so cute and makes me squeel every time.

Once I had the personality, it did take a little work to figure out where they would be and what they'd be up to, but I really liked the idea of them being restaurateurs with Louise, and even having a fake rivalry to draw business. Of course, leaning more into real Italian food than their father, even taking a trip to Italy to reconnect to their mother's heritage. Don't remember if I did write that into chapter two or three, but that's my favorite detail about them for sure (⁠´⁠∩⁠｡⁠•⁠ ⁠ᵕ⁠ ⁠•⁠｡⁠∩⁠`⁠)

5. I did actually do a lot of thinking about Millie's character, even though she is barely in the story. She's definitely a regular at the restaurant, coming in for coffee every morning and afternoon, and she works as a detective for the police.

I'm still a very acab person, but being a detective just fits Millie's personality, and honestly the way she can be a bit obsessive and a little less than moral fits the cop vibe to me. She's also backed off of Louise a little, and the two have managed to foster a reasonable level of friendship, though Louise is still wary to invite her to things because she flat out doesn't trust her.

The other background characters I absolutely adore are Tammy and Jocelyn. I always ship them, and I thought it would be a cute cameo that they show up to trivia night and just have fun drinking and giggling with each other rather than taking the game seriously.

Thank you so much for asking, and I hope this answered all of your questions (⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠) I don't think I have any other Roudise on the backburner (⁠´⁠；⁠ω⁠；⁠｀⁠) but if you choose to reas any of my other upcoming stories I hope you enjoy just as much as you did Bittersweet Reunion!

[octosan]

Seeing that choice infographic today got me thinking about Bellara in particular and it's like, huh.

The choice they listed for the end of Bellara's questline is listed as "keep the archive spirit" vs. "free the archive spirit" and that word choice in this stripped context immediately got me thinking, like...

Wouldn't it have been more impactful if that was just, the choice? That wasn't the choice. The choice for the questline was "do you want to let Bellara keep all this desperately needed information on the ancient elves for the sake of Bellara's people, or do you want to destroy it because something something it could be dangerous in the wrong hands?"

The question is "do you think that pursuing lost culture and knowledge for an oppressed people is inherently more valuable than the risks?" which feels like a very unbalanced choice imo. Like yes, obviously, lmao why did you even need to ask Rook.

But

The game never really discusses the fact that this information is being given by a spirit, a person (to some extent) who is bound to that artifact for all eternity. It seems very strange in retrospect because in Inquisition we had concepts put forward such as "spirits being bound is wrong, they deserve autonomy even if their personhood looks different from ours" and "Corypheus is trying out rituals to cut down on a person's autonomy for the sake of acquiring the information they possess" and the Nadas Dirthalen feels like a natural extension of both these concepts, if only the spirit inside it was not just, functionally, a silly little boot-licking AI.

I don't know how it would fit into the whole Anaris thing if they did this, but I think it would have potentially been more interesting and thematically appropriate if Bellara's questline had this idea that the Nadas Dirthalen is another extension of Evanuris/Forgotten Ones slavery.

This idea that she is burdened with an unfair sense of personal guilt about her gods turning out to be tyrants, because she loved and exalted the elven empire for so long in her own research without seeing the red flags. That's not exactly. What they did but I want to charitably say that's what they were intending with her dialogue about it.

Then she is presented with her ultimate goal made manifest--a manual all about what things were like in Elvhenan, even if from the perspective of a Forgotten One. Only, by the end of the questline, she has to ask herself very seriously if she believes that having this information is worth it being at the expense of an imprisoned being. Especially if you've seen the murals that explain how spirits and elves are linked (and this just makes me feel how weird it is that Bellara's questline isn't tied tighter into the main story anyway) but even then we have characters like Spite and Manfred who could communicate personhood and autonomy in spirits.

And I think that would have potentially been a harder choice for her to make.

Now, this would have the unfortunate suggestion that destroying the archive is the "good" choice and destroying the archive is such a horrible thing to do in context dfkgkfdskfg so maybe that's why they didn't do that.

idk though, I mentioned this to a friend and they suggested the story could at least give Bellara and Rook a consolation prize to lessen it. The spirit won't be around to "consult" but in gratitude it can impart the answers to Bellara's questions directly into her head anyway--demons can already canonically do that. So here Bellara has the information she sought for so long, but it'll be harder for her people to use it and to keep it. So it's a bittersweet, but she has the validation of knowing she is not like the Evanuris or Anaris, that she is a better person than her gods turned out to be and she was rewarded for that.

Or, if she does choose to keep the spirit, it's an unfathomably huge win for the Dalish, an archive of countless secrets about the elven empire that will last forever and can be protected, already organized and archived for them... but for Bellara in particular, it comes bundled with a very uncomfortable fact she learned about herself.

It'd be a heck of a foil to Merrill's questline where she had the impossible choice of setting a demon free or letting the information it knows rot forever.

[trailshome]

Also taking this chance to say that while I love how you write all the MCs, I especially love how you write child MCs. You write their interactions SOOO well and they feel like living, breathing, children, instead of this?? Caricature that some stories often reduce children to. The interactions are so well done, I went so 🥺🥺🥺🥺 during the interaction where Yorick lifts up a giggling MC and pinches their foot. Like!! Your character interactions and personalities feel so dynamic, and they're written so so well!! They genuinely make me feel so fond of them, even when I've only met them for one chapter!

Also, the contrast between the other MCs' relationships vs child MC's relationships to their family makes me SO 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔 Like?? They could've been an actual family if only they could've seen past their prejudices or jealousy or whatever it is that was driving them to treat the older MCs that way. I don't know, sometimes I wonder what the older MCs would think if they could see child!MC's life at their old home. Would it be sad? Bittersweet? Maybe they wouldn't care. But the itch of what could have been is KILLING ME and I am aggressively shaking all your characters in a jar HJSDLGHSKLGSDKL 😭

CORE MEMORY UNLOCKED?! asdasd i used to chew on foam letter bath toys when I was five. Something about the texture??? I got a genuinely good laugh out of this. Ironically awakened a memory I had forgotten -- not related to eating/chewing on things we aren't supposed to -- kids are funny. Like, they are incredibly reasonable and can ask some very poignant questions. On the other hand, they eat glue and chew on things. Lol!!

Yeah, the tragedy of the MC and their family is that it could have easily ended up differently had their cousins not been susceptible to their father's (mc's uncle) opinions. It's a shame because I think Yorick would have gotten along pretty well with most other MCs -- it just wasn't meant to be in their case. I think older Mcs would feel conflicted. On one hand; I'd like to think they'd be happy that child!mc was being treated well and properly. On the other... well, it stings a bit. Especially knowing how close they were to things being perfect (give or take Mom disappearing and Uncle being a jerk).

On the upside! non-child!mc's get a do-over of sorts! Obv it isn't perfect or completely ideal but like. MCs can end up with quite a large family if they so choose to allow/pursue it.

BUT! That's really open to yall's headcanons on how they'd feel about all that. Definitely a right mess and good for angst, haha!

PS. -- I am also aggressively shaking the characters in a jar. <3

[ozmaonabadday]

I’ve taken some time to gather my thoughts, and I’m sure I’m not going to say anything that anyone else hasn’t already said, but I figured I’d share my thoughts nonetheless, because were a community, and that means we care about each other.

I was introduced to Rooster Teeth near the end of middle school, by the same friend who introduced me to Neon Genesis Evangelion, and forever changed the trajectory of my life.

We watch Red Vs Blue season 5 while I was staying the night, and I was absolutely hooked.

I went back and caught up on the rest of the series, and honestly, I think I related to Church way too hard.

Few years passed. I saw they’d put RvB on Netflix, and feeling nostalgic I rewatched it. Out of curiosity, I decided to check out what RT had done after that, only to discover they’d put out SEVEN MORE SEASONS, which I of course immediately binged, like a gluttonous beasty.

It was in the bittersweet aftermath of that binge session that I decided to give RWBY a shot. I’d seen it advertised under RvB playlists, and out of desperation for more of anything like RvB, I decided to give the Red Trailer a shot.

Now this was during the hiatus between Volume 2 and Volume 3, shortly after Monty’s passing, and in those days I was nowhere near as online as I am now, but RWBY is definitely a huge part of why I am online. I tore through the first two Volumes. I started making fanart, I tried to introduce my friends to the show. I desperately googled any information I could find about when Volume 3 would be coming out (this is when I learned about Monty’s passing, and his impact on some of my favorite moments in RvB).

When V3 was announced, I immediately subscribed to RT first. And have been following RWBY ever since. I watched each episode as it came out, I would binge the entire series (some times multiple times) before a new volume came out. I joind RP servers, I created oc’s, I created a LOT of fanart. I have a yearly tradition of drawing a Ruby Rose piece just to check my progress as an artist. Just last year I started writing fanfic. I’ve got a bit of merch. I love RWBY. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve kept up with RvB pretty well, and I watched a bit of Camp Camp and Gen:Lock, but RWBY is my shit.

I know a lot of people are sad, scared, and confused right now. I know I was when I found out yesterday. I didn’t exactly keep up with the nitty-gritty of what was happening with RT as a studio, and a lot of the projects didn’t really strike my fancy, but there were a lot of things I adored from RT. I’m sad to see them closing their doors, and I’m just as desperate for information as the rest of you.

But we’re a community, and that means we care about each other.

I care about you.

I don’t care who you ship with who, I don’t care if you hate my favorite character, or what head canons you have for which characters. I care about you, and I’m glad you’ve been a part of this community for as long as you have been. I’m glad to have known you, even remotely. I’m glad to have seen your fanart, or gotten mad at your hot takes, or laughed at your incorrect quotes. I’m glad we’ve been a community.

This isn’t a declaration of defeat. I don’t know the future of RWBY any better than the rest of you do.

This is an acknowledgment, and an expression of gratitude. CRWBY may have made the series, but you all made this community. As much as it can sometimes be a dumpster fire, you make me proud to be a part of the FNDM.

So, I guess… thanks.

[hardlypartying]

I’m curious why you decided to end up bad habit with Jiara. Did it make sense to you at the moment? I remember Rafe and Kiara were pretty good living together and then she goes to marry JJ. Torture to all of us Riaras😭 fix my broken heart and pay my therapyyyyy

Hahaha long story short I wrote bad habit at a very strange point in my life and I essentially used it as a form of therapy to work through that period— I was also very sad and cynical and didn’t see another way to end it lol. (Melodrama was on repeat iykyk)

As for the story, Rafe and Kiara were living in this fantasy world where only they existed and it was selfish and unfair to the world around them— even if they found someone who knew them better than they knew themselves. It wasn’t rooted in reality and for a while there they had that, the mundane makings of life and they were content. But I didn’t see that as something feasible for them, to continue isolating. Rafe was shunned by his whole family while Kiara just picked up and left everyone behind. It was a very arrogant move and the only way I could see it working out is if they dug their feet into the ground back home and not let everyone else get to them. But that was never them, they wanted it to be only them far away from anyone to see. Which is cute in theory but you can’t base your entire relationship off that.

The jiara element to that is really a throwaway, it’s finding something familiar and right. There wasn’t even a comparable level of pull that riara had in the fic between jiara no matter how hard I tried. I did feel a certain pressure to make that the endgame but not enough pressure to force my hand, I chose to make that the end to prove the point:

The inverse is that this is a story about knowing when you’re seen and holding onto that, I think very rarely we get an opportunity like that and it’s chaos in good and bad ways but it’s up to you to decide what you make of it. And the two did a brave thing to be together and I’ll never fault them for trying to make it work and finally being honest/allowing that love in. They were both very wounded people who mirrored each other’s hurt in a way that made their own more palatable. And in turn they helped each other heal. It wasn’t conventional at all but I think they’re better for it even if they have to leave the other behind to carry on the lesson they learnt. I feel like the outrage for the last chapter (rather the final paragraphs) is 100% necessary because I want people to read it and take a moment to reflect on the characters and if they related to any part of the story and do what they would’ve wanted from the story rather than the typical/miserable ending. I know it’s just a fic but I’ve found nothing better to kinda get me back on track than fics/books/media where I’m so fucking pissed off at the ending that I keep going out of spite. I wish they got a happy ending, I really do, but it was what I thought was the best for them at the moment and I can’t really find it in myself to deviate from that. I’ve forever got a soft spot for them. I hope this isn’t too much of an emotional answer for you but truth be told this story can’t be untangled from my emotions at the time. I honestly think that’s part of the reason why it reached as many people as it did and that was a hugggeee risk and super vulnerable to put out there.

I always knew I wanted it to have a bittersweet ending and still stand by it! My personal situational aside I’ve always loved an ending that stings a little. But I’ve been chipping away at an alternative ending/future between the two, it is a little sweeter but I don’t want you to get your hopes up because I don’t see myself posting that in the near future. Another part of me is just wondering if I should just let the ending stay that way and not touch it, I don’t want to risk ruining it by adding something else to it if everyone’s moved on haha.

All this is super super super subjective, idk what my feelings will be tomorrow vs today :)

[neyafromfrance95]

So spapel has absolutely consumed my brain. I can't stop pleading to the snw gods to apply a canon fix-it because the idea of them permanently breaking up and Christine being tragically in love with her emotionally unavailable ex forever is too heartbreaking. Like, I'm already tense waiting to see how it all goes to hell this season (Christine's commitment issues combo with Spock not being able to reconcile acting on love vs. logic is my current guess) but whatever happens, the state of them in TOS with the new context of SNW is purely awful, and I don't want it for either of them!

anon, i understand you completely! i think we all do!

but the thing is, we do not know the future of spapel's relationship post-tos!movies, so there can be hope for them. after all, christine is still madly in love with him in tos and an added context from snw could hint that spock loves her too, he simply surprises his feeling for whatever reason.

besides, i have always thought that we had to fill in a lot of blanks in tos when it came to the characters' personal lives since unlike snw, tos was more plot-based than character-based, imo.

that being said, snw and tos are two different productions. just like there is no way pike is going from looking like anson mount to looking like jeffrey hunter in 5 years, snw!spapel's relationship won't ever grow into exactly what their dynamic was in tos.

snw presents their dynamic as that of the soulmates, not simply the first loves bc i believe spock loves t'pring and surely christine has had loved others in her life too. but to our knowledge, christine is the only one for whom spock decided to feel his vulcan emotions and spock is the only one with whom christine wanted to have a strings-attached relationship.

their relationship has been developed exceptionally well so far. i believe that it will have equally satisfying, but hopefully open-ended conclusion in snw. my only fear for now is that they will rush the breaking up storyline, rather than pushing it for much later.

what is interesting to me, is how often the intensity and the danger of vulcan emotions, the very emotions that spock let loose for christine, are emphasized. so i bet that's done for a reason. spock has already let his feelings for christine get in the way of his duties as the first officer - punching a vulcan man, almost starting a war, endangering his own life during the mission...

and listen, i love all of this as a shipper, but if i lived in the federation, i would be seriously pissed by the fact that my life may depend on a high-ranking starfleet officer who is so compromised.

it would be just so bittersweet, if the reason why spapel broke up is that a love like theirs wasn't compatible with being the starfleet officers, and it would be so much more impactful if christine was the one to act logically by breaking away, and maybe that's why spock is the way he is in tos, bc he hasn't quite forgiven chapel for leaving him.

i just hope i'm not massively setting myself up by having such grand, high-romance expectations.

but well, nothing in canon gets in the way of us imagining that 70 years old spock and christine got reunited and restarted their relationship anyways, haha!

[readyandnot]

ready rambles~

sovereign state season one finale

part three thoughts

spoilers under the cut

* well already the thumbnail is basically inversion- so i hoped that they wouldn’t summon in the middle of the stadium cause that’s fucking terrible.

* I CALLED IT

I FUCKING CALLED ITTTT

* STARLIGHT GETTING THEIR MEMORIES BACK LETS GOOO

* let’s talk about the memories cause omg- THEIR FIRST MEETING, it’s so crazy to see that their dynamic really isn’t any different, and avior is the same guy hence why he was sarcastic again when he pulled starlight back in- now of course his sarcasm is limited because he did fall in love with starlight BUT ITS STILL THERE AND ALWAYS HAVE BEEN

* next- the HEALING GOD THERES SO MANY HEALING SCENES IN THIS SERIES; i wonder how starlight got injured? they must have tried a plan that didn’t work? maybe got lost in a circle? nevertheless AVIOR STARTING TO GET SOFT WITH STARLIGHT I CANT the fact that he calls them “human” bro come on we all know you have a cuter nickname you can use LMAO; hearing the teasing and laughing from him AFTER SEEING HIM HURTING FOR SO LONG, it’s so bittersweet, i hope we can see him like this again in the future after everything

* also THE PARALLEL OF AVIOR NOT BEING COMPLETELY TRUSTING TO STARLIGHT VS WHEN STARLIGHT WASNT SURE IF THEY COULD TRUST HIM WHEN THEY GOT PULLED BACK IN I CANTTTT

* next- the kissing. i am still not over it. i have listened to this audio 5 times now, and i’m still not over this part. IM IMAGINING WHAT LED UP TO THIS AND WHAT HAPPENED AFTER AHHHHH; the teasing in between kisses. i love them so much. THE PASSION. THE LOVE YOU CAN TELL THEY FEEL FOR EACH OTHER.

* then, the “confession” scene i’ll call it; i hc that this is right after that previous memory (cause let’s be honest that was getting hot and heavy-) but i’d like to think after all that they talked about it and that’s where this memory comes in. HES SO SOFT FOR STARLIGHT, i’m just imagining him grabbing their face and just ADMIRING THEM. he’s such a romantic holy shit

* THE FINAL MEMORY OF THEM TALKING ABOUT THE COFFEE SHOP. OMG. the “starlight, look at me, please.” gets me every damn time. his comfort is soft and so beautiful it truly makes me so happy. i love this relationship so much.

* “i love you. so much.” STARLIGHT LOVES YOU TOO I PROMISE

* also- can we just appreciate the piano music for a sec? BECAUSE ITS SO SIMPLE YET SO BEAUTIFUL. i love using the music as another form of storytelling, it’s such a nice addition and doesn’t take away from anything, i love and have loved it so much. it’s so calming in a way. i wonder what music he used…

* THEYRE HOMEEEEEEE LETS GO; to all you non believers… haha :)

* THE DISBELIEF, THE REUNITING AND HUGGING, THE SIGHS AND SHUDDERS OF RELIEF- chef’s kiss, a wonderful reuniting

* SO STARLIGHT WANTED AVIOR TO GO THROUGH THEIR MIND- the parallel of avior telling them he could use that as a trick- BUT THEM SUGGESTING IT NOW OMG; i mean it makes sense, i honestly would’ve done the same because one- i would want him to see what i saw and two- it is really hard to explain and quote like it’s nothing so it’s a perfectly valid way to explain

* THE HESITATION. THE CONSENT. TAKE NOTES CUTIE.

* “behind this wall, come on.” I IMAGINE HE GRABBED THEIR HAND AND PULLED THEM UP AHHHH

* avior baby i’m sorry you’re overwhelmed but you had to see that. THE FACT THAT HE KNOWS THEY HAVE THEIR MEMORIES BACK, I CAN SEE THE SHOCK AND REALIZATION ON HIS FACE

* “and how do you feel about that?”

* [what i think starlight said]

“like this…” AND GOES TO KISS HIM COME ON ITS PERFECT

* THE KISSINGGGGG SUCH UTTER PERFECTION- THE MELTING INTO IT FUCK

* listen avior, priorities are priorities- kissing your partner after so long before coming to terms with your mission is definitely a top priority. i don’t blame you one bit lol

* “i’m still trying to wrap my head around the idea that you don’t fucking hate me!”

* “i never hated you.”

* so…. it happened on new year’s eve. I KNEW THE THUMBNAIL HAD TO DO WITH INVERSION

* also the fact that they were there for over two years and it was only less than one hour in the real world??? can someone do that math cause i cant-

* THE SIMPLE THINGS LIKE A DARK ALLEY AVIOR I GET IT ITS OKAY

i hate to see characters cry, but this time it’s understandable, and it’s not like a heartbreak cry, it’s a relief. something that avior and starlight needed- relief.

* THEY COULD HEAR THE PORTAL OPEN??? THEY CANT BE THAT CLOSE; AVIOR DO NOT GET ANY CLOSER I DONT WANT YOU TO BE LIKE GAVIN

* and then they stopped hearing the screaming, because that’s how quick the decision was made by david. holy shit. it sounded like it was forever because we heard everyone’s perspectives when in reality it was less than a minute, and we finally saw that. that’s crazy.

* “too late to stop this tide.” SO WHAT ARE THEY SUPPOSED TO DO NOW???

* “we just traded one hell for another” WAIT ITS NOT YOUR FAULT COME ON NOW

wow, all i can say is wow. this series is something i did not expect i would come to love so much when i first listened- but it had me hooked from the first audio. now i was one of the luckier ones and got to catch up before the “confession” audio. but i still had to wait and feel everyone’s pain of the wait LOL

but it was so worth it. getting to this point to where we’re almost caught up in the current timeline is worth it. seeing the character development slowly going from slow burn to not and reuniting was worth the wait.

avior has definitely risen up in my ranks for the characters because his development and arc is a beautiful thing. we saw him at his lowest and highest moments, we saw him make mistakes, learn and love. he is a character that i’ve grown to love and i’m sure other people have as well.

starlight. starlight is truly one of my favorite listeners at this point- they’re such an intriguing person, no wonder avior fell for them LMAO, but they have this personality that’s infectious and a soul that’s admirable; they are a person who is stubborn in the best way possible and it’s been amazing seeing how they dealt with the situation. and how they are with avior back then, when they got back in, and how they are now!

i’m so excited for season two, i have a lot of theories and ideas- for example, how they could possibly meet people working for project meridian, or helping take down closeknit with sunshine and elliott (maybe even sweetheart?), and maybe even colliding with vega and warden at some point! there’s so many options and ways this can go, and i’m so thrilled to see that they’ll do it together.

thank you redacted for such a wonderful series and i speak for everyone when i say that we cannot wait for what will go on in season two.

what’s next- now i believe we would get more updates with the balance after the avior season one finale! that’s going to be something- just back to back angst WE DO NOT HAVE A BREAK LOL, but i’m so excited for the balance and the upcoming simpler videos! let’s see what the next lineup has in store :)

ps- vote for milo for march redactness HE DESERVES TO WIN OKAY SAM ALREADY WON

here’s to the believers o7 thanks for reading <3

[agentmmayy]

november & december rotation

combining these last two months of 2022 into one rotation post since i did not listen to that much new music but what i did, i found some really good songs to end the year with so here’s a post to start the new year off 

golden child - paravi: whole bop!!!!!!!!! paravi’s voice is gorgeous. delivers the struggle of growing up “the golden child” so poignantly and without remorse. it’s absolutely delicious and cathartic 

remember why you fell in love - natalie madigan: not to blorbo this but i will. chenford. ‘we were adding up sins in the city of angels’ ‘if i said i’m gonna die i’m gonna do it my way’ this song is their entire arc no i don’t take criticism

don’t say - gabrielle aplin: the kind of song to listen to when dancing in the rain or driving through the city looking up at the tall buildings and realizing how so very small and insignificant you are. emo song. 

craigslist personals - WRENN: usually averse to titles like this but this song pleasantly surprised me. the chorus has been stuck in my head and rattling around in it for the past 2 months especially with the line ‘if you pretend i’m not around can you pretend to hear me out’ also the vocals are insane 

don’t go - kate stephenson: ‘you think you could leave me when i need you most i guess i’m dancing with your ghost’  it’s about the continuous cycle of being let down and being ready for them to leave and to get out of the relationship or situation but not wanting to leave the security of it and then the song shifts with same line but instead ‘i guess i’m laughing at your ghost’ the growth!!!!! the journey!!!! the realization that you don’t need them!!! 

nostalgic for the moment - kathryn gallagher: this song has a soft core early-mid 2000s rock aesthetic. favorite part in particular is ‘i like it when you touch me i like it when you call i picture how your clothes look on my living room floor’ something about the cadence and the vocals and just how vivid and honest it is. but also how sexy it is. ‘i pretend my hands are yours whenever i’m bored’ hello??????? 

rivers of my love - natalie madigan: tbh i wasn’t as impressed with this song as the previous one but as soon as i heard ‘i got restless in the bed that we made’ it put me thru the mf roof!!!!!!!!!!!!! what the fuck!!!!!!!!! enraptured ever since. the song is a relentless cry of admission and it hurts so good 

moonlight - madison rose: perhaps my favorite song on this entire rotation. the sing-a-long capability is unparalleled and yes i have sung along to it and danced in my chair and around my room. the perfect song to round out the previous ones 

GHOSTS - PI3RCE: i think this is ranking right up there with ‘memory lane’ on the gut-punching scale because every lyric came for my ass. which. ‘all i know is you’re the only solid thing i’ll ever know’ + ‘all my older loves have crumbled in my memories just like stone now they’re just ghosts’ how am i supposed to live laugh love in this situation!!!!!!! i’m not sure if it’s the slow almost syrupy music or the gentle hushed vocals but the yearning and the grief and the love is so palpable i tear up every time listening. the part about this song that blew my mind the most is that the singer is also a ghost. that’s why the song feels so ephemeral. and i will blorbo this. derek hale. and i’m a sucker for a cello.

putting this here at the end because the transition from don’t go to nostalgic for the moment was too perfect but this is such a contradiction regarding the use of ghosts compared to don’t go. a ghost being someone you’re glad to let go of where it’s bittersweet vs a ghost you can’t let go of and follow them onto the same plane of existence and even then you’re still looking for them is so insane to me. don’t go has the journey and the growth past that state of being meanwhile GHOSTS is stuck just like, well, a ghost

i won’t need to dream - jude york: everything about this song is dreamy (obviously) it reminds me a lot of similar songs, at least lyrically and in the first few lines, from disney films. it’s so hopeful and not exactly an adult version of those songs but one that makes our dreams seem more reachable. also i think my soul ascended hearing 1:04-1:16 for the first time 

[catboyebooks]

right, i'm kinda losing my mind here, apologies if this is a mess. the tricky thing with analyzing junko's character is that she's the character who gets to lean on the fourth wall the most, as her role as the mastermind has quite a lot in common with kodaka's out-of-universe role as the author. so i wanna talk both in-universe and out-of-universe about this one.

starting in-universe. i'm sure i've commented on this, but junko has a very different attitude towards the sdr2 cast than she did towards the dr1 cast and this has been fairly obvious throughout. it makes sense. junko was actually friends with her classmates in dr1. that group spent a year in lockdown together, it's definitely implied they were all pretty close. that's part of what made it fun for junko; it was personal. by forcing people she genuinely cared about to kill each other, she was causing herself despair, not just them, and we know that's the shit she lives for. as for the sdr2 cast, well, frankly, i think it's pretty clear she doesn't give two shits about these guys. monokuma frequently gets bored and impatient even when they're literally in the middle of the murder trials, the executions this time have been kinda phoning it in on the psychological aspect (what's the point in breaking this group? she's already been there and done that), and junko has also made it clear repeatedly during this trial that she thinks of them as a bunch of chumps and doesn't care what happens to them at all. she's not even trying to kill the survivors, that's how little they matter to her. in junko's mind this is still about her vs. naegi. when i said earlier that her and naegi's argument felt like a continuation of their argument from 1-6 — it is, that's the point. she's still trying to break him.

the realization that junko has merely been using the sdr2 cast to bait the dr1 survivors into another confrontation with her (not just any confrontation, but one taking place in a VR reality she has godlike power over) reframes the entire game as not really being about hinata and the others at all. combined with the reveal that hinata and co. are former terrorists, this makes you seriously question whether the game will give them a happy ending, or even a bittersweet one. because of the way this game has closely paralleled the first, you go into chapter 6 of this game assuming that everyone still alive at this point is going to ultimately live and escape, because they're the heroes, but now the game is telling us they're not the heroes and the mastermind herself isn't concerned with their fate one way or the other.

junko's claim that the sdr2 cast agreed to this all in advance, tricking the future foundation into sympathizing with them so they could help her execute her plan, is especially troubling. this is a really tough one to dismiss; at this point, knowing so little about what this group was actually like before the memory wipe, we don't really have a way of disproving it. naegi's already reassured the group that junko brainwashed them and he's sure it can be overcome even if they don't keep their memories from VR, but we know that naegi is prone to getting blinded by his own optimism, and he's not the sharpest knife in the drawer... so is his read of the situation actually correct? has the game actually just been tricking us into rooting for the bad guys the whole time? is hinata actually the protagonist of this story?

even though i know how this game concludes, this part of the game still makes me feel like the cast might actually be fucked. i'm sure the first time around when i got here i did seriously consider whether they might be fucked. like, at this point it seems like the final showdown might actually take place between the dr1 trio and AI!junko, and since the sdr2 cast are junko's former(?) allies, it seems very much not guaranteed that they'll get their happy ending or even live through this.

oh god i think i'm gonna have a lot to unpack here.

so then kirigiri tells junko this isn't a game (because she's acting like she's having too much fun, per usual) and junko says, actually, it IS a game, it's a game that started with the killing game i put our class through, and that's why these "chumps who weren't around last time" have been reduced to side characters. we gotta have a logic dive about what that means too, naturally, and hinata puts it together that the killing game was never actually about them. this was all aimed at the future foundation. junko was broadcasting the killing game live to every member of the future foundation via the cameras. sonia's upset because, she admits, she "did a lot of disgraceful things" in front of those cameras. togami replies "you... sure did." i guess you could interpret this in multiple ways but personally i lean towards thinking sonia's been jackin off crazy style all the time in here (there was that earlier joke about her spending a long time in the bathroom that seemed to be implying similar?) anyway i laughed

hinata got told this part earlier, but the rest of the group doesn't know, so the dr1 trio explains that they couldn't intervene sooner because of the virus. up until now they couldn't enter the program themselves, initiating a shutdown sequence from outside the program wasn't working, and while they did consider just cutting power to the VR program entirely they didn't know if it would be safe to do so, so didn't risk it.

anyway. this revelation, that the killing game was never about them at all and they were essentially just used as bait to lure in the future foundation, is pretty upsetting to the group, but junko takes it a step further by telling them they actually agreed to the whole thing in advance. that they agreed to this, and helped her set this trap for the future foundation, of their own free will. naegi protests that this can't be true, but he's clearly never considered it before, and junko calls him naïve for not realizing shsl despair played him.

i gotta say more about this. we have to pause. sorry