#it's going to be my birthday when i wake up tomorrow!
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Weightless Paradise
Pairings: Caleb x reader
Tags: angst, hurt no comfort sorry yall, basically just how Caleb probably felt during his story branch, English is not my first language so grammatical errors WILL be present, I haven’t written a fic in a very long time so I’m very rusty pls bear with me
Words: 1072 words
Note: Gonna be honest with yall. This doesn't feel like a fic, but at the same time it does feel like it. According to @qinluna, this is a blurb so I'll take her words for it 🤡 Thank you for proofreading this for me 🥺❤️ Also, would be cool if you read this to Caleb's BGM. Just sayin' 😌
It was hard to see you leave after being apart for so long. But knowing you were unhappy being with him brings more pain to him than anything could ever have.
The last few days have been the happiest he felt. Meeting you again after almost a year since the incident that changed everything, he couldn’t describe the feeling he felt the moment he saw you in the crowd when the fleet landed in Skyhaven.
Even during the interrogation, he held himself back from pulling you close to him. To comfort you, to tell you how much he misses you, how glad he was that you were safe.
And when you cried in his arms after he assured you that he was, in fact, alive, his heart broke seeing how hurt you were. He wishes that he could take that pain away from you and promise himself that he would never leave you alone again.
During your time at his place, it felt like he went back in time. Back to when everything was so simple. No Farspace fleet, no Aether core talks, and no complicated feelings.
It’s just you and him.
He tried to pretend that nothing had changed. That he’s still the same Caleb that you knew. The same Caleb who would tie your shoes, wipe away your tears, and the same person who would accompany you when you got scared during thunderstorms.
But both of you knew that everything was far from being the same.
He had once promised to you that there would be no secrets between you two. That you can always trust him with everything you have.
Then why did he avoid answering you when you asked him what happened after the explosion?
He couldn’t find the answer to that.
All his focus now is to keep you safe. To make sure no one can get to you and hurt you. Not under his watch.
Even if he had to be the bad guy, he would do anything to protect you. The most important person in the world to him.
So he tries to make sure you never leave.
He began to decorate his once-cold home, to make you feel more comfortable.
He even gave you his room.
Though he would prefer it if he could sleep next to you, like you both did when you were younger.
He still remembers the nights when you couldn’t sleep because it was raining heavily. Thunders were roaring outside and you carefully peeked into his room with your little teddy bear in your arms.
You hesitate to wake him up that night, knowing that he has to wake up early for school tomorrow.
But to your surprise, he was awake, reading the encyclopedia he got from Gran for his birthday.
He turns to you and with a knowing smile, he pats the empty space next to his bed, ushering you to come to him.
And you, without any hesitation, ran up to him and climbed up on his bed before settling yourself under his blanket as he hummed a lullaby to lull you to sleep.
He wished he could go back to that time again.
The explosion really changed everything for you both.
During his time at the hospital for his recovery, the only person he could think of at the time was you.
He wondered if you got hurt. He wanted to make sure you were okay. He wanted to comfort you when you found out about what happened to Gran.
But with all the things that happened that led up to where he is now, it felt like it was for the better that he didn’t reach out to you first.
Knowing what he knows now, he’d rather keep you locked up somewhere far away.
Far away from everyone’s reach. Where he knows you’d be safe. Where no one can hurt you anymore and use you for their selfish reasons.
Even if it meant sacrificing himself.
So when you told him how you didn’t need his protection, something in him snapped.
How could you not see that he’s doing this for you? For your own good? Can’t you see how everyone around you is just there to use you?
But when he saw the fear and anger in your eyes, he pulled himself back.
Seeing how much you didn’t want to be kept as a prisoner made him realise that as much as he wanted to keep you safe, he didn’t want you to completely hate him for doing what needed to be done.
Some people say to love is to let go. But can he really let you go knowing the dangers that await you out there?
It’s not like he doubted your ability as a hunter. He has seen you in action before and there is no doubt that you were more than capable of protecting yourself.
So why does it hurt so bad when you said you didn’t need him to be safe?
Is it because he was so used to being the one who you could lean on? Or is it because he was scared that you’d abandon him now that you could take care of yourself?
Despite all the complicated feelings, he knew he had to let you go. He’d rather see you happy than being miserable under his “protection”.
As much as it pained him to admit it, he couldn’t pretend that everything was the same as the past. As if the explosion never happened. As if you didn’t just mourn his “death”.
So on the day he had to leave for his next trip to the deepspace tunnel, he wanted to pull you into a tight hug. Knowing that this might be the last time you’ll see each other.
And when you gave him a sad look when he said you’d be happy to see him go this time, his heart felt like it was being pricked by countless sharp needles. He wanted to tell you that he’ll miss you, and he wanted to apologise for the way he’s been acting.
But the words never came out of his mouth. He hesitated.
He couldn’t bring himself to look back as he walked towards the starship because he knew the moment he looked back, he wouldn’t be able to leave.
And now, staring at the hologram of the deepspace tunnel, he couldn’t help but think if he could’ve handled things differently.
#love and deepspace#caleb#love and deepspace caleb#caleb love and deepspace#reader x caleb#caleb x reader#off to bed now. gnite yall#mine
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Camouflage...
I haven't been able to find my Loop in a few days now, and I'm starting to get worried...
Btw, has anyone seen my jar of pills that make you green?? They went missing around the same time my Loop did
#greyscale under read more#it's going to be my birthday when i wake up tomorrow!#yippie!!#uncoincidentally it will also be 9/11 in america#yippie!!!#in stars and time#isat#isat loop#unreality#art tag
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#grief sucks grief sucks grief sucks#i thought i’d never move on from her death and i hate the fact that in some ways i have#i hate the fact that i can wake up each day and go about my life and almost forget that she’s gone#i hate that it takes something like her birthday to bring up all the feelings of mourning again#because honestly? at least when i lived with the grief every day i was used to it being there#but now it’s something i feel occasionally and it hurts so much more because every time the grief comes back i feel her dying all over again#all week i’ve been absolutely miserable before i even realized how soon tomorrow was#and i’ve been thinking of her more too. literally was thinking i should learn how to extreme coupon the way she did bc she used to bring me#it just sucks she shouldn’t have died. not like that.#she was too young and it all happened so fast and just#she should be able to celebrate her 55th birthday with us#but she didn’t even make it to 50. what the hell man#i hate this i hate grief i hate that i have to miss her at all#i should be able to call her and text her and she would’ve helped me so much with the phase of life i’m in now#because sometimes she was mean and she was so stubborn but she others first and loved us more than anything#i can’t believe she’s been gone six years and i can’t believe i’ve celebrated six of her birthdays without her#what the actual fuck
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I still have 5 hours left in my shift 😭😭😭
#I just….#really wanna go home today#not having a good day. I started my period this morning and then I got to work and found out only me and one other opener were there but our#opening manager wasn’t here yet so she was late and we spent the next 20 minutes rushing to get everything set up before we opened#and then we immediately started getting customers and it’s just been busy and I’m tired and just don’t feel good bc of my period#and then so far I’ve had 2 of my least favorite customers come through the drive thru where I’m working#one is this dude who’s just fucking annoying another is the guy that asked for my number a few months ago who I haven’t seen since I turned#him down so I took his order and then made someone else deal with him at the window#and then it got busy with everyone ordering drinks like hot coffees which meant I had to walk from our drive thru out to the lobby bc my#coffees were out bc everyone wants coffee today but when I would do that I would still have to be taking orders#and then someone cleared a few specialty coffees off the barista screen without making them while the person was sitting in the drive thru#so I had to make those while doing other stuff too and people were asking me questions#and I was just getting very overstimulated and annoyed plus I’m hungry#and I just want to leave and go home and sleep but it’s my best friend’s birthday so she’s probably gonna want to do something later but I#just don’t feel up to it and I know she’s probably ready to hang out because she’s been off for 10 days with Covid so she’s well rested now#for her birthday but 😭😭😭 I just want to crash into my bed so hard and not wake up until noon tomorrow#also the coworker I work with every day and don’t like is here today unfortunately#and also all of the speakers we use to play music in the back are dead right now and I just want to play music#first world problems but I have so little patience today
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you know how in the first hunger games book when katniss sleeps in the cave and it’s mentioned that in the dark of the cave she is allowed to move her face how she wants without having to put up a façade for the cameras. yeah that’s kinda fucked up. anyway I consider the shower and my bedroom the only ‘safe’ places where I can emote/do whatever without fear of being watched/judged by others which is kinda pathetic
#when I say I’m going to bed I’m not always going to sleep right away.#usually the period between ‘going to bed’ and ‘going to sleep’ is where I just. breathe. and i can take off the mask for a mo#i feel bad tho#cuz my dad was confused as to why I was heading to bed so early#and of course my mom was in the room too so I can’t admit that I want this stupid fucking day to be over with asap#and the sooner the she-devil’s face is out of my sight the sooner I can feel a little calm#then my parents had the balls to talk about me driving to my therapy session tomorrow#which made my heart start beating faster and suddenly I’m more stressed out than before#this day has sucked ass#and i just want to cry and fall apart in someone’s arms#but. there isn’t anyone I can do that with. not in this house at least.#nearest person I can think of is one of my friends and frankly he’s better off without my whining#I just want to die#or at least fall asleep and have a nice dream and never wake up#I. I don’t really want to wake up tomorrow?#only thing keeping me going is a birthday party for my friend and ayaka banner on the same day#and chewie#other than that…idk.#vent
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Okay I have a story.
So my birthday is this Sunday (May 26th). My mom ordered some presents for me but one of them (an Etsy purchase) was seemingly stuck in transit and might not make it on time. I tell my mom all good, no worries. She gets in contact with the seller. After a long delay in response they get back with "Right we'll fix it!" It ships, tracking label and everything, good to go! ETA May 22nd (yesterday.)
During the work day I check the tracking and it says it's been delivered in/at mailbox! I double check with my mom "hey, is it mailbox size?" because if not, I don't want it sitting at the front door where anyone walking by could snag it.
She says "it's definitely NOT mailbox size." Okay. I text my neighbors in the building "Anyone seen a package delivered? It's a birthday gift from my mom and I wanna make sure it gets inside!" Success! Floor 2 David (not to be confused with Floor 1 David) had brought it inside. Inform my mom. All good!
I stop by home briefly around 4pm, because yesterday was hot-hot and I just installed my window A/C that morning in the living room, and according to my cat cam my stupid cat hasn't spent a single second in the climate controlled living room and is, instead, voluntarily baking herself elsewhere so I'm like "great" and hop on my bike to go home (10 minute ride) to check on her.
I get in the building door. Patches is crying from the top floor because she heard me. I maneuver my bike in the front hall. The ugliest fucking 6-foot-tall cat tree(?)/totem(?)/statue(?) I've seen in my entire life is just. Standing there.
My first thought is "What the fuck is that." My second thought is "Oh fuck that is for me." I look around at the floor in case there's perhaps anything else that might, in fact, be the gift.
No. Me and Cat Pole.
It's taller than me. I turn it around to face me and its face is painted and this is, in fact, uglier than it looked from the back.
Um.
Patches is crying. So I just haul it up to my level. MAYBE it was supposed to come with twine that I wrap around it (and hide its face from the world) for Patches to scratch. Maybe this is a prank. Maybe this is an inside joke, because when my mom moved into her current house the neighborhood gifted her some ugly-as-hell totem that apparently, by tradition, each newest-comer to the neighborhood is required to have and display in their window so maybe this is a very good riff on that.
Patches rubs against it. She's not afraid of this horrid facsimile of her kind.
Great.
Meanwhile SHE'S fine and the condo is a little toasty but totally liveable so I'm like "Good, cool, you're not baking. You're having a good time. Enjoy your new sister, I guess, I'll see you later."
I go back to work because this is a problem for later me.
After work, after my run, after whatever, I get home and it's like 8:00pm and Patches is so happy to see me and the totem pole is still just. There.
I text my friends like "so a bday gift is here from my mom and it's the Biggest Ugliest cat pole I've seen in my life. Is this a bit? Did my mom go 'that's so ugly haha! send!' Maybe she genuinely found it cute. How do I navigate this." My friend Sarah has the good advice to maybe text my mom neutrally like "Got the cat pole!" and feel the waters whether my mom is like "Isn't it ugly? 😂" or "Hope Patches likes it! 🥰"
My mom goes to bed early so I don't do any of that yet. Problem for tomorrow me.
This morning, Patches wakes me up for breakfast. I get her situated and I'm staring at the fucking Cat Pole again. I wonder if my Mom's been wondering all night what I thought of it.
I take a picture. I text her.
Okay.
I get on call with my mom. I ask for clarity that the ungodly horrid thing is NOT my birthday gift and is in fact a mix-up from the seller who sent me this instead of my actual gift. She's wheezing between words. She thinks I'm being too charitable for the amount of Absolute Fucking Ugly this is. I have to gently talk her out of using the word "monstrosity" while messaging the seller asking what the hell happened here.
I tell her I need to apologize for harming her dignity with Floor 2 David, who thinks this fucking thing is my mom's idea of a great birthday gift for her to-be-28-year-old daughter.
My heart goes out to the poor soul who did actually order this cat totem and is lacking it on this lovely day.
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notes from nicole piastri's interview on red flags pod
oscar started playing monopoly and chess when he was 4-5 but he was too good at chess (relative to nicole) that she boycotted it
nicole opened her twitter account because oscar wasn't replying to her at boarding school and she needed a place to chastise him ("can you not answer... i KNOW you're on your phone") (it worked because he started replying to her there)
instead of unflappable she calls him "conservative"
even during christmas and birthdays he was never super excited, one time they went with a group of 5 mums and 5 kids to a hi-5 concert (popular australian kids' musical group) and while all the kids were "going nuts" oscar just sat there "focused the whole time" and didn't smile or move lmfao. they were like 3 years old
didn't know what she was doing with oscar as a baby because he was her first child and her mothers' group was her only reference and they went "isn't the best part of the day when you wake up and go to their crib and they smile at you?" and she was like ??? because oscar would wake up and just SCREAM every single day needing to be out of there immediately and she thought that was just normal... then she had the girls and went "ahhhh... so that's what they're talking about"
when he was younger than 2 he needed them to read car magazines to him and was already obsessed with all things automotive and while they were driving would just name off and point out car brands by their badges
for a long period of time he behaved like he was a car and would "spin" his wheels and pretend to accelerate and run like a car lol
did a big burnout the first time he was on a bike (it had training wheels but he still learned very early)
as a mum she wishes he'd chosen golf or tennis since it's much safer than f1 and sometimes people tell her that she technically had a say in that when he was a kid and she said "but i didn't! it was just in him!!!"
won an academic award when he was 13 and she was president of the parents' community so she presented it to him, normally these events are super formal and you simply shake hands but she gave him a big kiss and instead of acting embarrassed or spluttering he looked at the crowd, nodded silently, and walked off
came back for the summer a few years ago and they were biking on the beach together when she had to brake hard to avoid a kid and went over, when she recovered and got back on he went "are you all right?" very deadpan but after they got home they checked his heart rate monitor and saw that he was totally steady the whole time except for when she crashed and his heart rate went through the roof, told him "ah so you do have a heart... we just don't see it"
"there's no sibling that can piss him off?" "well he's a boy with three girls so he just doesn't go there because he's never going to win"
met lily in person for the first time when he came home for the melbourne grand prix (was still alpine reserve), at midnight oscar was like "hey mum you know the dts film crew are coming tomorrow morning right?" and she was like WHAT... and he was like yeah it'll be chill they just want to film us having breakfast like a normal family or whatever and she was like Mate you haven't lived here for 5 years now do you know what breakfast looks like. it looks like your sisters storming downstairs and grabbing an inappropriate breakfast and storming out the door giving me the finger!!! and then the next morning lily comes down and nicole is like "oh is oscar up?" and lily is like no... i think he's still in bed... (many such cases) and then mae refused to be in it so she got dressed and ran off to school 2 hours early to escape them. and then the mclaren fiasco happened and the whole thing got cut out of dts anyway
when she said "oh my god you met matt damon!" he was just like (shrugs) "yeah... yeah..."
they communicate by facetiming and he's Always lying in bed. one time in bahrain he was leaning back on an ornate tapestry and she asked what hotel he was staying at and he was like oh i'm at the royal palace i'm like a guest of the crown prince. she freaked out and was like "oh my god!!! get your head off the tapestry!!!" and he just looked back like ? no it's fine it looks pretty old lol
called her to tell her that he signed his f1 contract and when he said mclaren she Realized and was like oh no i love daniel!! and he straight up deadpanned "yeah everyone loves daniel. that's going to be a problem..." and said verbatim "of all the f1 drivers ever daniel is the worst one to be replacing"
one time in f4 chris couldn't go to a race and billy monger had just had his crash so she flew to the uk for the weekend to support him and when she was driving him back to boarding school she was happy because she had 2 hours to spend with him and she wasn't sure when she'd see him again but instead he slept the whole way through and the moment they got back to school he went "ahhhh... home sweet home" and she wanted to slap him lmfao
first day of primary school when he was 5 years old he said he didn't need her to walk him to school and she was like "well i actually do mate" so he forced her to walk behind him the whole way and the moment they got there he turned to her and went "all right i'm here you can go now" 😭
the chinese & italian & yugoslavian is on chris's side of the family while nicole's is scottish & irish ("that's where the pasty skin comes from")
red flags pod sent her a shirt with oscar's face composed of His Tweet and she showed it to him and he immediately said he wanted it
he gave her a small warning before he posted the tweet but it was just like "mum so this is going to happen just don't worry about it. it's all under control. it'll be fine" and was very calm the whole time
"we just had to trust that his personality would come through at some point, because the way he came across was not at all what he's like. people will work out who the real you is so just continue to do what you do" 🥺
all of the kids were obsessed with Cars (2006)
likes his mum's golden syrup dumplings and grandmother's rumballs
AT THE SINGAPORE GP IN 2023 HATTIE DISAPPEARED FOR HOURS TO GO SEE A K-POP CONCERT 😭😭😭😭 i think it was p1h lmfao (nicole was asked for her favorite group and went "i have no idea. five boys") ((it's txt)) meanwhile oscar is only into house music and she thinks everything he plays is the same song
did pilates when he went home but never with her and thinks it's a lot harder than it looks
takes him minimum 24 hours to respond to anything she sends
she had an exact conversation with oscar where she asked who he wanted to be teammates with and he said "well if i go up against lando i don't even have to get close the first year because everyone knows how good he is" 😭
oscar you are so you 🧡
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in 1.5h it will be christmas day but i am. Im. There is dread
#theres. idk how to say it i just. i didnt have the money for gifts really and one hasnt arrived#and i feel like im failing christmas but thats not.#the dread is. theres.#i have been feeling an intense loneliness as of late that i think is just a product of living w 3 people who#are all in a relationship w each other so they all talk all the time and hang all the time and#just never really talk or hang w me anymore the way we used to#and theres a. i could barely afford anything for them and one of them i was told not to get anything for#and now its. im.#theres a pretty big pile of presents under the tree and it looks festive and cute but its. theres.#its a little discouraging to see a Large Pile and not a single one having my name on it#and its bc one of them has told me already that the package they ordered for me was delayed#its just. idk the season is only adding more to the way I've been feeling for a Whilr#but i dont have. theres not really#i dont have any other friends. and i know the family time tomorrow will be. not very good for me#and its just very. im dreading it.#and then next week theres a day where my flatmates having her birthday party and ive got work the next day#so i have to wake up at 4am so i just know its gonna suck#bc the partys probably still gonna be going kinda hard long past when i need to go to bed#i am just. i have not been feeling good lately and i am trying to dive into tumblr and my hyperfixations#in an attempt to compensate but its. its not really working#i wish the store was open tomorrow so i could just work and not have to deal w the holiday lmao#negative cw
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i hate my older sisters parents in law so muuuuucch
#wind howls#her boyfriends parents are either annoying or straight up make me want to attack them. her boyfriend too#like her boyfriend isnt the Worst. hes just so annoying and such a manchild. ive heard a Whole lot from my sister abt the problems he has#and his parents are just so. well i wont go into details out of decency but geez. real glad my parents dont suck That Hard#anyway her mother in law is throwing my sister a surprise birthday dinner at her house tomorrow. which my sister did not want.#my sister specifically went to a cabin out in the woods for the weekend because she is so tired and wants peace and quiet-#for her birthday.#what ever. i cant even go there for too long but its just sooooo bothersome.#at least here if i ask my family not to wake me up at midnight to wish me a happy birthday theyll respect it =_=#and when i didnt want a party and just a nice dinner they also respected it. thankful for that
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I keep seeing shit about like don’t compare urself to others and you don’t have to be successful by a certain age or anything but god it’s so exhausting being depressed anxious off and on suicidal since I hit puberty like I’m so tired like I have no idea how anyone lives their life and does things
#i will literally be like ‘oh I can’t get a job. I’m reading this book right now.’ as if that means I’ll be busy for the next month#like oh my god what is wrong with me I wish I was better I wish I meant it when I said I wanted to get better#if I wanted to get better I would put in the effort and take my meds consistently and get a job and try at all#but I just don’t even have the energy to pretend I want things to go well I just feel like I’ve missed my opportunity to make something#of myself even though I know I haven’t. it just all feels so fake. it’s all seemed so fake for so long#I feel like I’ve been out of my body for years and the only memories that feel real are from before I moved to Florida like 2021 - now is#just a complete blur and idk if that’s from trauma with dad dying or just that something in me fucking snapped when I got ripped away from#everything familiar in my life at once like it fucked me up and my old therapist said something about how moving again drudged up all the#feelings I felt as a nine year old when my family moved the first time but I think all the feelings I felt were new and different and I#just didn’t want to deal with them so we talked about my past but like. idk. it just all feels fake.#it’s my brain and I can’t ever get away from it this is just the brain I have and the past I have to deal with and the future I can’t escap#but it’s finnneeee it’s all fine I’m gonna smoke a bowl and go to bed and wake up tomorrow to my mom and her boyfriend on his birthday and I#will cry when they leave but I will mix myself a drink and pretend I’m fine with anything my life has become
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A Firm Partner
Rating: Explicit. 18+ (Minors DNI) Pairing: Lawyer Joel Miller x Female Reader Summary: Mr. Miller needs you to stay late... even if tomorrow is your birthday. Warnings: porn with very little plot, smut, unprotected p in v, office sex, couch sex, desk sex, fingering, oral (f receiving), joel has a filthy mouth, joel carries you and refuses to pull out while doing so, joel eats pussy from the back, probably the best way to ever wake up, law talk (but not a lot, this is an escape), no use of y/n Word Count: 3,400
A/N: Happy birthday dear @ohheypedrito! You are the absolute cornerstone of my Pedro obsession and nothing has been better than sharing in the delulu of him over the past couple of years. I can't believe we've known each other for 20+ years and all it took was Pedro Pascal to become so close. Sometimes I truly don't know how I'd be able to survive without our delulu yap sessions. Thank you for all that you do, and most importantly, being my friend. I wrote this while wearing my TTPD cardigan and listening to our shared delulu Joel Miller songs. 🪿 Thanks to @schnarfer and @mothandpidgeon for their input and always letting me talk about how much @ohheypedrito means to me lol. Please also enjoy the requested nose against clit and playful spank mentions gifted from @schnarfer.
Masterlist
—-
The conference room is full of your coworkers, engaged in hushed conversations with each other as you take your seat at the mahogany table. Joel Miller strides in, your eyes are instantly drawn to him as the room hushes, his mere presence commanding attention.
He settles into the high-backed leather chair at the head of the table, everyone and everything seems to shrink around his presence. Joel’s reputation precedes him, his firm is the most prestigious in Austin. You can hardly believe you landed a position here, fresh out of law school. But you’re here now, sitting mere feet away from the man himself. You admire his broad shoulders filling out his impeccably tailored suit, the dark green color of his shirt highlighting the golden glow of his skin and the deep chocolate brown of his eyes.
“Good morning everyone,” his deep voice rumbles through the room as he begins to outline the case. You try to pay attention to him, try to focus on the case, but you can’t stop thinking about his plush lips. Would they taste of the strong coffee he’s drinking? How warm are they this morning? You’re mesmerized, watching the way his mouth forms each word, the slight Texas drawl rolling easily out.
You’re interrupted from your reverie when you hear your last name and look up, your eyes meeting Joel’s. “You’re going to need to stay late with me tonight and get this taken care of.”
You nod, attempting to hide a sly smile as he continues on.
—-
The office fell silent hours ago, the last of your colleagues had long trickled out as the sun set. The only sounds now are distant noises from the city below and the clicking of your heels on the polished floor as you walk down the dark hallway to Joel's office.
You stop at the threshold, taking a quick moment to admire Joel. He’s sitting hunched over his desk, the light of his desk lamp casting him in a golden aura. His dark green shirt, usually crisp and buttoned to perfection, is now softened by the late hour. He’s undone the top few buttons, your eyes widen when you’re blessed with the glimpse of his neck and chest. His sleeves are rolled up, exposing his toned forearms dusted with dark hair. His long, thick fingers absently tap against the stack of papers in front of him. Sensing your presence, he looks up, his dark eyes finding yours in the dim light.
“Come here,” he says, his voice a low rumble. “I need you to take a look. Close the door.”
The door clicks as it softly shuts, now it’s just you and Joel Miller in his office filled with polished furniture and framed accomplishments. The heady scent of him overwhelms you—coffee and expensive woodsy cologne—as you move towards him. Joel’s intense gaze follows your every move as you stand next to him. His shirt pulls taut across his broad chest when he leans back, running a hand through his hair.
“These depositions,” he says, gesturing to the papers on his desk. “Something’s not adding up.”
You lean in, acutely aware of how close he is as you scan the documents. You can feel the warmth radiating off his body as you reach for a page. He watches as you read through it, your eyes scanning through the typical legal jargon.
"What do you make of this discrepancy?"
"I think… we need to look closer at the witness statements,” you lay the paper down, searching for another file.
“I think you’re right,” he murmurs as he leans in to examine the paper.
“We should compare these statements side by side.”
“Mm, good idea. There’s more room on the couch.”
You nod, goosebumps prickling across your skin as you walk over and settle amongst the cool, leather cushions.
He sits next to you, impossibly close, you’re acutely aware of every point where your bodies almost touch. Joel leans back, the leather creaking slightly, as he casually drapes an arm along the back of the couch, just inches from your shoulders.
You try to focus on the papers in your lap, but you find it too daunting as he leans even farther in.
“What do you think?”
You turn your head slightly, your lips now mere inches away from his. Intense and unreadable dark brown eyes stare into yours. You can hear the ticking of the clock sitting on his desk and yet time stands still.
“I think…" your voice barely above a whisper. “We need to look closer.”
Your mind races, you can hardly keep any semblance of composure as he shifts slightly, his thigh now pressing against yours. The heat of his body seeps through the thin fabric of your skirt.
“Closer, huh?” he drawls.
You nod. Joel's eyes flicking down to your lips, then back up to meet your gaze.
“Mr. Miller,” you whisper.
“Baby, you know you can call me Joel.”
“Joel…”
The papers on your lap flutter to the floor as he closes the remaining distance between you. His lips are warm, soft, and familiar, reminding you of the last time you kissed him–yesterday morning when he backed you up into the supply room, whispering against your skin how much he missed you.
A soft whimper leaves your lips as your mouth opens, allowing his tongue to taste yours. A trail of fire is left on your skin when his hand slides up your thigh, bunching your skirt as he goes. He knows how to touch you and how to make you moan… Joel Miller knows you.
Charting a path, his lips move to your neck, nibbling and sucking at the sensitive spot he knows you love to be kissed at.
You’re whimpering, already writhing against the smooth, cool leather of the couch. All day you’ve tried to focus on work, tried to figure out the case in front of you, but your mind was consumed by thoughts of Joel’s body pressed against yours again. It’s been almost six months of sneaking around, of heated glances across conference rooms, of always feeling his eyes on you while you’re in the office. Six months of pretending you're just another associate, when really you're the one who knows exactly how Joel Miller likes to be touched.
“Been thinkin’ about you all day darlin’,” he drawls. “Been waitin’ for you.”
Thick fingers find the apex of your thighs, already slick with need. He clutches your thighs, parting your legs as his palm grazes along your silky skin there. He smirks, a devilish look, when he feels just how wet you are for him.
His lips find yours again, kissing you deeply, like he really has been waiting for you.
You’re squirming, aching for more, and when he slides a hand higher, skimming the edge of your damp underwear, you sigh his name. “Joel…”
“Love it when you say my name baby,” he growls, pressing his finger against the soaked fabric. “Can feel how much you want me.”
His fingers slip beneath the elastic, finding your slick, swollen flesh. A long moan escapes you as he parts your folds, stroking your needy pussy. Your hands fist in his dark green shirt, holding on as he his thumb circles your clit. His touches are confident and purposeful, working you over like you’re a case.
Open-mouthed kisses are trailed along your jaw and down your neck, nipping at your racing pulse before soothing it with his tongue.
“You’re so wet f’me, aren’t you?”
You moan an affirmative noise as he leaves one last, chaste kiss against your lips before he moves to settle on the floor between your parted legs, his hands gripping your hips tugging you to the edge of the leather couch.
He slowly drags your panties down your legs, throwing them behind him before bunching your skirt up around your waist. He spreads your legs wider, his brown eyes darkening as he takes in the sight of your pussy dripping for him.
“Look at you, baby, so beautiful. Been thinkin’ about tastin’ this pussy all damn day.”
His dark eyes meet yours before he dips his head, the tip of his nose sweetly bumping against your clit as his tongue licks against your aching cunt. Your fingers thread through his thick hair, holding him close as he laps up the taste of you.
The way his tongue slides along your slick folds, teasing and probing before plunging inside has you arching off the couch with a gasp. You feel his warm breath against your skin as he sighs contentedly, his mouth working tirelessly to taste you.
"Oh god, Joel…" you cry, fisting your hands in his thick, dark hair.
He hums against you, the vibrations making you shudder. He holds you in place as he alternates between long, slow licks and quick flicks of his tongue against your clit, keeping you right on the edge.
When he slides two thick fingers inside your slick heat, you nearly come undone. He pumps them in and out, slowly, so achingly slow.
"Joel..." you whimper, fisting your hands in the dark waves of his hair.
"You taste like heaven, baby," he rasps. "Could spend all night right here, worshippin' this perfect little pussy."
The tension inside you winds tighter and tighter, your thighs starting to tremble on either side of his head. You're right there, chasing that peak you’ve been waiting to climb all day.
"That's it, baby," he rasps against your flesh. "Cum for me.”
His gruff words are your undoing. With a sharp cry, you shatter, your walls clenching around his fingers as your orgasm rolls through you. He works you through it, not letting up until you're spent, chest heaving and panting.
Your limbs are loose as you float back down to earth in the middle of Joel Miller’s office, he places a soft kiss against your core before crawling back up your body.
“You taste so fuckin’ good, darlin’,” he growls before kissing you. You moan, licking the taste of yourself from his lips and tongue. Your hands slip under his shirt, feeling the plush of his belly before the hard planes of his chest.
Joel pulls back, his dark eyes boring into yours with intensity. He grips the fabric of his shirt and with one swift motion, tears it open. Buttons scatter across the room, leaving a trail of destruction in their wake. You smile and take in the sight of his broad, golden chest.
You fumble with the smooth fabric of your blouse as you quickly remove it, revealing your light blue lace bra. He growls, fixated on the swell of your breasts rising and falling with each breath you take.
His large hands run up and down your stomach as you reach behind and unclasp your bra, letting it fall away.
“Perfect,” he breathes before dipping his head to take a nipple into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the sensitive bud, teeth grazing lightly. His hand comes up to palm your other breast, kneading the soft flesh.
You're writhing beneath him, cunt aching with need as he sucks and nips at your breasts. “Please Joel,” you whimper.
He releases your nipple with a wet pop, a devilish grin on his face. "Please what, darlin'? Tell me what you need."
"I need you.”
With a groan, he pulls back, undoing his belt and zipper, shoving his pants and boxers down, his hard cock springs free, his thick shaft hard and ready to fuck you. Veins trace along the length of him, pulsing with need.
You lick your lips unconsciously, wanting to taste the bead of precum glistening in the dim office light. Your hands reach out, feeling the nest of dark curls at his base as you give him one, long and tight pump. His hand covers yours, and with an agonizing slowness, you both stroke him, spreading the slick precum along his cock.
“Fuck me Mr. Miller.”
He groans, his hips bucking slightly before hooking his arms under your knees, lifting your legs up and apart, spreading you wide open as he notches himself at your entrance.
One, smooth thrust in and he’s sheathed fully inside your wet heat.
"Fuck, baby, you feel so good," he grunts, his thick cock spearing you as your hands roam over the flexing muscles of his back, your nails digging into his skin as he fucks you into the leather couch.
He pauses, his dark brown eyes locked on yours in the dim light of his office. You feel deliciously full, stretched around him.
"You take me so well, darlin',” he rasps, punctuating each word with a roll of his hips.
The leather couch creaks beneath you, his hands clamp down on your hips, yanking you against him as he pounds into your wet pussy. His breath is hot against your neck, as he sucks against the delicate skin there, fucking you senseless.
His arms wrap around you, pulling you up against his broad chest. You gasp at the sudden change, when he lifts you off the couch, his cock still buried deep inside you.
"Hold on tight, baby.”
You oblige, wrapping your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck. Your breasts press firmly against his chest, nipples dragging against the coarse hair of him there. He walks you across his office over to the desk, his thick cock shifting inside you with each step. You exhale a breathy giggle when his palm makes contact with your ass, leaving a sweet sting against your flesh.
“Fuck darlin’, you feel so good wrapped around me like this.”
His thighs flex with each thrust as he pounds you relentlessly. He growls your name, fucking into you, his legs set wide as he stands. Your head falls back, exposing your throat to his hungry mouth. He latches on, sucking and nipping, grunting against your skin.
With one swift motion, he sweeps everything off his desk, scattering papers and pens to the floor before placing you on the edge of the desk. A small whimper leaves your lips when he pulls out, your pussy already missing the stretch of his cock. You’re pathetic for his cock, trembling with need, your legs spread wide. He steps back and looks you up and down, the edge of his mouth lifted in a cocky grin as he admires your wide eyes and heaving chest.
“Turn around and bend over for me darlin’.”
You comply, sliding off the desk and turning around, spreading your legs wide, presenting your ass and cunt to him.
“Mm,” Joel breathes appreciatively before you feel him kneel behind you.
He pulls you back slightly, your pussy meeting his warm breath ghosting over your skin, a shiver of anticipation rolls through you when you feel the tickle of his beard on the backs of your thighs as he nuzzles against you.
“Goddamn, you look good enough to eat.”
Your fingers scrabble for purchase on the smooth desk surface at the first swipe of his tongue against you. A long, low hum vibrates against your cunt as he delves deeper, his tongue worshipping every fold and crevice of your pussy. His nose bumps against your ass he buries his face between your legs, the wet sounds of his mouth working you over fills the office.
You whine, your hips rocking back against his face, squirming all over his eager mouth. He sucks your clit into his mouth, his tongue swirling in relentless circles. Your legs begin trembling, barely able to hold you up. He chuckles lowly, before leaving one last kiss against your pussy.
He rises behind you, his hands sliding up your back to grip your shoulders, his cock hard and lightly tapping against your ass.
“Easy now,” he grits, his voice rough and low. Your hips sway at the anticipation of feeling the length of him pulsing inside you again.
The broad head of his cock teases your entrance before he pushes into you, stretching you wide. He leans over you slightly, one hand moving up to press between your shoulder blades while the other clutches the edge of the desk for balance. His skin meeting your skin echoes through the room blending with your heavy breathing.
Your eyes flutter open, catching sight of the reflection in the window. Joel–his jaw clenched tight, brows furrowed together creasing his forehead, deep brown eyes watching his cock fuck your accepting pussy is backlit by the city lights twinkling outside. His power is on full display for only you and the secret you two keep.
He pulls almost all the way out, swirling his length around your entrance, before sinking back in, his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips as he anchors himself. Your fingers claw at the desk, searching for something to hold onto as his cock pistons into you.
“Fuck, you’re squeezin’ me, can feel you gettin’ ready. Need to see your pretty face when you cum f’me.”
He grabs your waist, turning you over with ease. He hovers above you, his broad frame caging you in, pressing your back against the smooth surface.
"Gonna fuck you so hard, baby," he promises. "Gonna make you feel it for days. You deserve it, don’t ya’?"
Wide eyed, and staring at him, you nod.
He sinks back into you with one deep thrust, bottoming out inside your slick heat, your head rolling back as he fills you completely.
"That's it darlin'," he rasps, his hips snapping against yours. "Take me so well."
Your legs wrap around his waist, drawing him closer, deeper. His thick cock drags along your walls with each thrust, his finger finds your clit, circling it in time with his thrusts. Your head falls back against the desk, a high keen escaping your lips.
"Look at me," he commands gruffly. "I want to see those pretty eyes when you cum for me.”
You force your heavy lids open, meeting his intense dark gaze. His brow is furrowed in concentration, a light sheen of sweat on his golden skin.
The pressure builds inside you with each stroke of his thick cock, every swipe of his finger against your clit. Your entire body feels like a livewire, every nerve ending alight within you.
"That's it, baby. You're so close, I can feel it. Your sweet little pussy's grippin' me so tight."
You’re teetering on the edge, ready to tumble over. Joel fucks you more erratically, his breathing labored. You know he’s cresting on the edge, right next to you.
The tension inside you snaps. Your back arches off the desk as your orgasm bursts through you. Your walls clenching Joel's cock as you cry out his name, your vision going white at the edges.
"Fuck, you're so perfect," he grunts. "Feel so good cumming on my cock."
A guttural groan tears from his throat as he stills, spilling deep inside you.
You cling to each other as you float down from the high, pulses gradually slowing. He places tender kisses along your jaw before claiming your lips in a slow, deep kiss.
"Should we get back to work?" you ask against his lips, a sated smile playing at the corners of your mouth.
He chuckles, the sound vibrating through his chest pressed to yours. "I think we're done for tonight, sweetheart. Let me take you home, want to wake up next to you on your birthday."
—
Your body feels heavy and relaxed with sleep, but there's a warmth building between your thighs. Slowly drifting into consciousness, you become aware of the source - Joel’s tongue lapping at the sensitive skin between your legs.
You let out a soft moan, your fingers instinctively carding through the thick tendrils of his hair. His hands grip your hips, holding you in place as he devours your pussy.
Blinking away the last signs of sleep, you prop yourself up on your elbows to look down at him. His dark eyes twinkle with golden flecks lit by the soft early morning light filtering through the curtain when they meet yours.
He pulls back slightly, his plush lips and beard shiny from your slick. A roguish grin spreads across his face as he gives you a wink.
“Happy birthday, darlin’,” he drawls before diving back in between your legs.
—-
🪿
#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#joel miller fic#joel miller x you#joel miller fanfiction#pedro pascal#joel miller fanfic#joel x reader#joel the last of us#joel miller tlou#joel miller au#joel tlou#joel miller one shot
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Spoiled - LN4
Pairing: Lando Norris x gn!reader
Word Count: 800+
Warning: making fun of the british (slightly), expired food
A/N: the idea popped into my head after watching max's stream a few days ago. Also i'm pretty sure its Lando's birthday already somewhere in europe!
F1 Masterlist / Masterlist
Some days you wondered how Lando was still alive. Never mind driving a rocket ship on wheels for living, no, it was because he decide to put anything in his body without a second thought. Despite spending millions on cars and watches and other material items he didn't give a second thought about something he needs to survive, food. You blamed it on him being british and the fact that they don't have anything good to eat. You knew about the sweet potato incident, even if it was before you knew him. Finding out he went and ate spoiled food again was enough to give you the ick and put your foot down.
The plan was simple. Buy new groceries, do some meal prep and clean out the fridge for Lando while he was playing Tarkov with his friends. He mentioned that he was going to play all day and that max was going to stream later on in the night. That gave you enough time to run to the store and cook some easy meals so you could surprise him with a full fridge.
After waking up early and sending a text to Lando that you were going to drop off something later tonight, you headed to the grocery store to pick up everything you needed. A bunch of fresh produce to meal prep and some snacks that can last on the shelf for a few months. With Lando's strict diet (or lack of there) you pulled out all the stops for a healthy and tasty meal.
As night time crept up you packed everything in bags and made your way over to his apartment. You got a notification that max started his stream a few ago so it was the perfect time to sneak in and fill his kitchen while dropping off some dinner. Any noise you made wouldn't be too out of the blue seeing as he knew you were coming and that you already had a key.
While entering the house you could already hear the screaming and weird random sounds coming out of your boyfriends gaming room. That should keep him distracted for awhile. First you started with cleaning and sterilizing his fridge. Doubt he didn't have much which is probably why he ate expired chicken, but one could never be too careful. Once that was over with you packed away all his food that should last for the week. Seeing the finished product brought a smile to your face. At least he was going to be eating good for the week.
Once his current raid ended you quietly made your way into the room being aware that his mic was on and that possibly a couple thousand fans could hear what could be said, even with this shit mic. When his door opened he saw you and an immediate smile was plastered on his face.
"Hey baby." He smiled taking off his headphones and motioning you to come by him.
"Hi. I just came to drop off dinner. Don't want to keep you long." You smiled placing the plastic bag on his desk before he pulled you onto his lap.
"It's okay, raid just ended and the mic is off. Stay for a few seconds."
"Alright. I made you my famous stir fry. There's another serving in the fridge for tomorrow." You said bringing out the food and fork setting it up for him.
"What would i do without you."
"Eat expired chicken."
"Haha i get it." He gave a fake laugh making a real one erupt from your throat.
"Yeah you seriously gave me the ick. This was going to be a surprise but i stocked up your fridge and did some meal prep. You just have to heat it up in the microwave, although i'm scared you'll even mess that up." You laughed at another joke your boyfriend seemed to be the butt of.
"Move in with me." All of the joking mood went out of the room as he looked at you with a serious almost pleading expression.
For you it came out of the blue. Sure you've been together for almost two years and you've spent a good portion out of the year traveling with him to races, but moving in together never crossed your mind. It seemed like the next logical thing in the relationship but neither of you brought the topic up till now.
"What?"
"Sorry, i was either going to blurt out that or marry me. I figure it's best to go in order." The words came out like it wasn't the most bizarre thing he could say in the moment.
"You're crazy."
"Yeah, for you. So what do you say?" How could you say no to that adorable smile.
"Well someone needs to keep you alive." a smile slowly crept upon your face liking the idea of seeing with him more and being closer to him. Also it would save you money, monaco wasn't cheap.
"Perfect." He said leaning in for a kiss before you pulled away.
"I'm not kissing you after you just ate expired chicken."
"That was yesterday!"
#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando norris#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#f1#formula 1
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cw/tags: househusband!nanami, fluff, smut, fem!reader
— oh househusband!nanami my love…
househusband!nanami initially resisted the idea of being a stay at home husband when you first proposed it. aghast, he might even say. he couldn’t fathom the possibility of being dependent upon your income. not that his masculinity was threatened or anything of the sort. you were the one supposed to be spoiled while he does the hard work.
your husband was traditional in a quite endearing sense. bless his giant heart and his even bigger cock.
“darling, i want to do this. for us,” you had gently insisted. reaching forward, you took off his spectacles and brushed a hand around his cheek. “you deserve to be pampered, too.”
househusband!nanami was exhausted from the long hours over many years and he knew his wife was sorely aware of that fact. he leaned into your touch, hazel eyes slipping shut.
“alright, my love.”
it took some adjusting to his new role during the first few days. when your alarm rang, you swiftly silenced it so he wouldn’t wake up. looking over your shoulder, you find his side of the bed empty.
househusband!nanami had gotten dressed as usual before remembering he didn’t need to work anymore. instead of going back to bed, he whipped up a breakfast feast fit for a queen. he also sent you off to your big-shot job with a kiss and your lunch.
soon enough, this became a routine. a hearty breakfast followed by a “see you later” kiss—kento didn’t like saying goodbye, it’s always “see you later.” househusband!nanami wanted to bring a smile to your hectic days so he stuck an adorable note in his neat handwriting squarely on your lunchbox. he never ran out of words to express his love for you.
househusband!nanami was finally able to tackle the books that had accumulated on his side of the bedroom but never had the chance to read. you could only imagine how he looked like, all cozy. in the nook of the living room where the sun shone best, he had one leg tucked under his body with his glasses perched on his sharp nose.
when he was not devouring words, househusband!nanami was taking himself on a stroll in the neighbourhood with a cup of a pick-me-up coffee. once, he passed a park and sat at a bench watching the mothers playing with their children with a soft smile. however, he quickly walked away because he realized his presence as a sole man just lingering at the edge of the park might be a cause of concern for the mothers. you giggled later over dinner when he recounted his thoughts to you. what a thoughtful man you married.
you wanted to give him 10 children.
if not books or a stroll in the neighbourhood, househusband!nanami was doing his duty ever so happily between your legs.
"k-ken..." you whimpered, back arching gracefully while your nails scraped his undercut in a way that made him growl into your pussy. he knew how much you loved the vibrations as much as he went crazy for your nails on his scalp. "missed this pussy today....mmm...” he captured your clit in a wet, hungry kiss. “take tomorrow off for me, sweetheart.”
this part of the night quickly cemented its spot as his favourite. to absolutely neither of your surprises.
househusband!nanami became fast friends with the owners of your favourite bakery. they already knew him from his frequent visits after his long shifts to pick up something sweet for his wife but the more he hung out there, the closer he got with the bakers. you were particularly fond of the strawberry shortcake from there and what did he do? oh yes, he learned how to make it. everything was from scratch down to the syrup. by the end of it he was sticky but super excited to surprise you with it for your birthday.
"honey, those better be happy tears," he chuckled, drawing you into a tender hug. either that, or the cake turned out to be a disaster.
"of course they are, kento!" you blubbered in his chest. strawberry syrup and whipped cream was smeared around your mouth, mixing with your tears.
oh, how you adored this man to his bare bones. and he devotedly breathed in the very air you exhaled.
#mimo writes#provider mindset for nanami ONLY 🔥#nanami kento#kento nanami#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen kento#jujutsu kaisen nanami#jjk nanami#jjk nanami kento#jjk kento nanami#nanamin#jjk x y/n#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk smut#nanami x reader#jujutsu nanami#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen fluff#nanami smut#kento smut#kento x reader#kento x y/n#jjk kento#nanami kento x reader#nanami kento x you#nanami kento x y/n#jujustu kaisen#jujutsu sorcerer
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Hiiiii! So I’m not super thrilled with this but I’ve been having a time of it at work so I worked on this when I could 🙃
Not sure if there will be a second part yet tbh we’ll see!
Edit: almost forgot to add that the gorgeous divider below is by @gildui they have some absolutely beautiful cod themed dividers.
Carrion
Reader comes back Wrong
Content: implied/referenced torture, injury, suicide reference/implicated “pact” (by background character), lack of wound care
The breakup was bad.
Not in the top 3 of Simon’s worst nightmare-inducing memories - but likely top 5. He certainly wakes up chest aching and eyes burning often enough for it to be a solid contender. He’s haunted by tears that dripped like acid and the cracks in your voice deafening him.
On bad days, he thinks he can still see you shuffling down the halls, eyes sunken and red-rimmed, dark circles and chapped lips. Anger giving way to resignation giving way to pain and sadness. The rest of the team tight-lipped and wincing, no sides taken, shoulders and ears offered equally in commiseration.
Your misery wanted no company, though.
You didn’t tell Simon that you were leaving. Gaz let slip over a subdued but obligatory game of cards, you’d be gone for a long time - loaned out to Laswell.
Simon didn’t go to see you off. Didn’t ask why you were leaving or accuse you of being too immature to be on a team with him. He didn’t wish you good luck, stay safe with the rest of the team on the tarmac at 0-dark when you took off.
He should have.
Price says you’ll be gone for six months. Just six. It’s better this way, he reminds them when Johnny balks. His eyes are on Simon, though, when he adds that you need to get your head on straight, and you weren’t able to do it with them.
So. Six months.
Simon stops expecting you on his left. Stops smelling your shampoo lingering on bits of clothes he pretended not to notice you steal. He still dreams about you begging him not to push you away.
183 days come and go.
On day 184, Laswell sends word - your temporary team likes you quite a bit. They want you to stay on for one more month… one more mission… one more…
Six months turns to ten.
312 days since you left; since you were home.
The team hasn’t stopped leaving a space for you at their tables, right between Gaz and Price. You miss your own birthday. Laswell says she’ll pass along well wishes.
The situation changes. A target resurfaces. All hands on deck, including yours.
374 days. Twelve months and some change.
They don’t spend the holidays with you, but there’s a stack of presents waiting in Price’s office. Your mugs have collected dust in the back of the rec room cabinet.
Laswell says you’re still deployed on one last mission, return TBD. Soon, though.
487 days. Still TBD. Soon. Really. Just some loose ends to tie up.
561 days. There was some trouble during exfil but you’re alright. Just a bit of recovery.
You’re coming home.
590 days. You’ll land at 0700 tomorrow.
It’s been 591 days since Simon last saw you. Since any of them last saw you.
Laswell has come to deliver you personally, a kind of apology for keeping you away so long. She’s the first off the transport and you’re right behind her.
Your hair is shorter. Much, much shorter. There’s a new patch on your jacket - memento from your temporary team, Simon figures.
Apart from that, you look… almost exactly how you did when you left. Dark circles under your eyes, mouth drawn and tight. There’s invisible weight compressing your shoulders, urging them in and down. But you’re there again. Just the way he remembers.
(Why are you the way he remembers?)
“Long time, no see,” Gaz calls, reaching for you.
There’s half a beat, you blink. Hesitate.
Then you grin and reach back.
“Missed my pretty face, did you?” you reply.
Johnny laughs and brings you in for a hug. You twitch hug him back, patting his shoulder as you pull away.
“Good to have you back, Sergeant,” Price says, shaking your hand.
You turn to Simon, nod in greeting, expression pleasant. “Ghost.”
So that’s how it’ll be? Alright.
“Sergeant.”
That night, you go out for drinks with the team and Laswell. Simon goes along to show there are no hard feelings.
(Not that you seem to need reassurance. It’s not even that you’re not looking at him. You are. Whenever he speaks, the rare times he does, or if he shifts in his seat. Your gaze doesn’t linger or jerk away, you treat him like you do Johnny and Gaz and Price.)
When Johnny mixes up your usual for Price’s, you don’t even seem to notice. But Simon does.
“When did you start drinking whiskey?” he wonders.
You used to swear you’d never like it, claiming it tasted like boot polish and the “Boys Club” wasn’t worth the indigestion it gave you.
“Someone from my other team,” you say by way of explanation.
You don’t ask for another whiskey. Laswell gets the rest of your drinks for that night.
Simon turns into the rec room two days later and finds you already there. There’s only the light above the sink on, and you’re staring at the steady drip, drip, drip from the faucet. A cup of black coffee cools in your hand. You’re already wearing gloves.
“Sugar’s in the left now,” he calls.
Your head twitches, something pops in your neck.
“Oh, thanks,” you chirp, turning for the cabinet. “Sleep okay, LT?”
“‘Bout as well as I ever do,” he replies gruffly, sidling up next to you for the kettle.
You hum. There’s a yellow packet in your hand. (Didn’t you used to like the blue one?)
“I get that,” you sympathize.
He snorts. Since when?
“Do you?”
When he glances down, you’re not looking at him. Instead, you’re trying (and failing) to get the sink to stop dripping.
“You know that’s been broken for ages,” he says.
At least as long as the 141 has been around. You tried to fix it once when you first joined up, too, with no luck.
“Right,” you say. A little too quickly, a little too agreeably. “Well, anyway, enjoy your tea, Lieutenant.”
You leave the packet of sugar behind. Unopened.
You’re back and it’s like it used to be - not just before you left, but before the breakup. Before there was ever anything to break up.
Your time away seems to have given you whatever space from Simon you were hoping for, because you act like there was never anything at all.
He’s half expecting, dreading, that you’ll pull him aside at some point. Ask for a word after dinner, or swing by his room before bed. Talk about the break up now that cooler heads prevail and 19 months have sanded down the rough feelings. Seek closure, maybe.
But you don’t. The weeks pass until a month has gone and you never exchange more than easy pleasantries with Simon. You give him space, give him privacy. Things you never used to give him much of before, for better or worse.
You fool around with Gaz and Johnny, trade quips with Price, and follow Simon’s orders. Train recruits. Write reports.
You’re back, better than ever.
So why does it feel like Simon’s still waiting for you to return?
You’re always dressed now, head to toe. Day or night, rain or shine. From the neck down you’re in full sleeves, long pants, boots and gloves.
It doesn’t occur to anyone until you’re sweating through your compression shirt in the gym. Wipe your shiny forehead for the dozenth time before Johnny says, “why not just take it off?”
“It’s not that bad,” you laugh, waving him off.
When you lie down to bench press, Simon notes the bottom of your shirt tucked tight into your waistband. He exchanges a glance with Johnny - he’s seen it too.
You used to dress in shorts and sports bras during exercise, a towel over your shoulder. In the common room, you’d mill in tank-tops and boxers. Even used to trot down the hall swaddled in a towel or robe, mumbling that you forgot a razor or some other toiletry before showering.
“What, did ye get an embarrassing tattoo or somethin’?” Johnny asks finally.
You blink at him, expression bemused. “A tattoo? Why do you think I have a tattoo?”
“Yer covered up like a nun on Sunday. It cannae be comfortable.”
You snort. “Just because you’re allergic to clothes, MacTavish…”
“Allergic?! Wha’s tha’ s’posed t’mean?!”
Gaz barks a laugh. You grin and continue your workout.
Simon tries not to be disturbed by the name “MacTavish” coming off your tongue for the first time since you met.
It’s your first mission since you’ve been back. You have new gear, a new handgun. Something’s been carved into the side of the barrel in Cyrillic, Simon can’t read it. A new callsign.
(“What kind of a name is Carry-on?” Johnny teases, but he doesn’t quite hide the unease in his eyes.
You snort and lace your boots tighter. The edge of you sleeve inches up, revealing the curve of a glossy scar that wasn’t there before.
“You’re one to talk Mister Maybelline.”)
Someone painted an upside down cross on the temple of your helmet with their finger. You thumb it before stuffing it over your head.
“You ready for this?” Gaz asks, knocking his knee into yours. The two of you have been paired together for this mission. (Was it Simon’s imagination, or did you look annoyed that you would have a partner?)
“Always,” you reply.
Simon doesn’t hear what happens, but Gaz looks shellshocked when you haul him into the helicopter during exfil. You shake him a bit once everything is secure and the bird’s in the air.
“Garrick,” you shout, “c’mon, where did he get you?”
It takes him a second but he blinks, offers his arm for your inspection. You move with a speed even Simon is impressed by, tearing into the nearby med kit almost viciously. Gaz is patched up in record time and you sit back with blood on your hands, barely even seem to notice as you wipe them carelessly on your pants.
(You used to be more squeamish, weren’t you? You used to be the last one they asked for medical care because seeing your teammates in pain made you nauseous.)
“What about you?” Gaz asks after a small eternity.
You yawn. “What about me?”
“You got nicked too, didn’t you?”
Simon takes a second look at you and now that Gaz mentions it, you’re soaked in blood. Wet patches on your vest, your pants, dripping down your boots. It takes him a moment to notice the tear in your thigh, shredded flesh visible when you rock with the wind turbulence.
“Did I?” you wonder, glancing down like you only just noticed it.
Johnny curses, reaches for you - but you wave him off.
“It’s just a scratch,” you reply. “Barely even feel it, no worries.”
Then why is it still bleeding?
When the team lands, you hop off the heli without so much as a wince. Droplets of blood lead all the way back to your room.
(When Simon asks Nikolai about the hand-etching on your gun, he says the word means “promise.”)
In the after-action report, your callsign isn’t “Carry-On.” It’s Carrion.
Laswell takes you off the mission two months later, a joint assignment with KorTac. They send three operators to work with TF141 - Stiletto, Konig, and Nikto.
On the transport to infil, Simon notices the Russian inspecting his handgun in a seat separated from the rest of the squad. He recognizes the Cyrillic carved into the barrel this time: Promise.
It’s an eerie, creeping suspicion. An anxious fog rolling in.
It’s not one single thing that trips an alarm in Simon’s head, but a steady collation of oddities over months. A single arhythmic beat, a note off key. Just once or twice, but over and over until he can’t notice anything else.
You act just like yourself except for all the minute ways you don’t.
You smile big and wide, sunshine bright, when they make a good joke. Your laugh is still the same, bubbling up in your throat, head thrown back. You smell the same when you pass Simon in the hall, shampoo and soap that’s haunted him for a year and a half.
It’s insidiously subtle; he can’t pinpoint what it is for the longest time. Your mannerisms are almost too practiced, the cadence of your voice too measured. A missing turn of phrase you often used, replaced by something unfamiliar.
Simon dismisses it as guilt-laden paranoia. The two of you ended on bad terms with a year and half worth of space between. He’s hardly one to gauge what’s normal for you anymore.
And besides, the few times someone else has noticed at those tiny yet all-too-obvious inconsistencies, you shrug it off as something you picked up while away.
But he catches Johnny’s brows furrow one afternoon as you light up a cig (after swearing for years that you’d never pick up the habit) and Simon knows he’s beginning to see it too.
“You ever notice,” Gaz begins slowly. You’re the only one missing from the rec room this evening, retired with a drawn-out yawn. “That Carrion always mentions being away, but never talks about it?”
Simon stills. Johnny’s eyes fly to Price, who’s grimly tapping at his crossword puzzle.
“The file’s redacted,” he says. He’s seen it too then, tried to investigate for himself.
“That’s normal for a mission like that,” Simon reasons carefully.
“I don’t mean the mission,” Price says. “I mean Carrion’s file.”
“This is a good movie,” you mumble from the armchair you’ve stolen from Price. “What’s it called?”
Simon exchanges glances with the rest of the team. No one points out that this is (used to be?) your favorite.
Price looks into the team you were loaned out to. All were KIA or remain MIA. All but one. His file has been scrubbed too, the only documents readable are discharge orders and a PMC contract, both associated with the callsign “Nikto.”
They’re running out of time.
Less than 36 hours on the clock with only one lead, and it’s a zealot with a suicide pact. Price and Laswell both took a crack at him with nothing to show for it. Even Ghost has gotten hardly anything and he’s running out of nails. With time, he might get something useful, but they don’t have much of that left.
In the anteroom looking into interrogation, you’ve been observing through the one-way glass with your hands in your pockets, head tilted, expression serene.
Price and Laswell are discussing strategy, contingencies. Gaz and Johnny are throwing in their two cents, but Simon… Simon is watching you.
Like medical, torture used to be your Achilles. You were trained like the rest of the team, but there was never any need for you to step into the room yourself. Hell, you were a last resort even for observation or emergency resuscitation. No one blamed you for having a weak stomach for information extraction.
But today, you glance over your shoulder and make eye contact with Laswell.
“I’ll handle it,” you say with an air of finality.
The room goes silent. Price opens his mouth, but it’s Laswell that speaks, voice hard with resignation.
“Do it.”
You don’t blink. “Yes, ma’am.”
You walk out the door without a backwards glance, shoulders loose but each step steady and purposeful.
“What the hell is going on, Kate?” Price demands.
Kate sighs, looks away as you enter the interrogation room.
“Let’s do this outside. It won’t take long to get that intel.”
The only thing she’s able to share is that you and your team were captured. For a long time. And then you’re already stepping out of the interrogation room, wiping your bloodied hands off on an old rag.
There’s an unusual glint in your eye, an unnatural stillness in your expression.
“Got what we need,” you announce cheerfully.
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hiii 😭 I REALLY LOVE UR GOJO X YN SO MUCHHH 😔😔 I was also wondering like maybe what if y/n has a wound, like any where 🥲 it could be either on her back, arms, legs but she doesn't wanna tell gojo abt it and she hides it, then he will find out about it either she winces when gojo hugs her, starts wearing long sleeved clothes or her shirt lifts up while sleeping 🤧 TYSMM❤❤
strain — gojo satoru x f!reader
a/n: I am honored that you like my works, love! hope you enjoy this as well 🫶💕🫶 also happy birthday to the man, the myth, the legend: gojo satoru!! (it’s still his birthday in my country so hush I am not late)
you are more than a capable sorcerer. in fact, you are one of the strongest in the field.
however, like anyone else, there are some moments where things get a little out of hand, and you come back bearing a rather long slash on your left arm.
but since it’s pretty late, you decided you will bother shoko about it in the morning. that is how you’re finally in your home, with satoru nowhere to be found.
you frown lightly at the fact that he is still out there fighting curses, but a part of you feels relieved that you don’t have to explain your situation right now.
the night should pass by smoothly, and you will go to shoko tomorrow: a fool-proof plan!
so you do what you can to sanitize the wound, and cover it until you can get it treated properly. you also take the chance to indulge in your favorite snack as a good job treat.
after finishing your food and tidying up for the day, you’re finally in bed, all-cozied up and avoiding anything touching your wound as much as possible.
a deep breathe in, a deep breathe out, and you slowly drift to sleep.
not much time passes before satoru’s familiar footsteps echo throughout the house.
your husband has an abundance of energy.
but it seemed like today’s missions have drained him a bit more than normal, so he skips eating anything and heads straight to your shared bedroom.
his heart softens, and his muscles relax upon the sight of you tucked in bed. he walks to press a small kiss on your forehead, quickly changing into his pajamas and settling right by your side.
he stretches a bit and turns to spoon you as per usual, eyes closing in contentment.
but you wince, even if adeptly, and it sends alarms ringing through his head.
he jerks up, and his hand is instantly placed on your arm again, softly. there is an ever so faint change in your expression as your eyebrows furrow, and he has never pulled his hand away so fast.
he keeps debating in his head whether to wake you up or not, but he swiftly settles for the former.
he needs to know what happened. so he, regrettably, nudges your sleepy form, “y/n?”
you groan, but, nonetheless, you reply, “…what?”
while satoru often likes to base theatrics around his every move and phrase, but he also knows when to get straight to the point, “did you get hurt on today’s mission?”
you’re no longer half-asleep, and you quickly sit up, eyeing your husband. knowing there is no escape nor denial, you fidget with your fingers and nod slowly.
then you hurriedly utter, “but I was going to see shoko first thing in the morning; I promise!”
he nods slowly, holding your hands in his own. you’re left to look him in the eyes. satoru’s eyes being exposed makes him feel so vulnerable, or at least that’s how he is with you.
you can see every wrinkle, and every crease; you can see what he is thinking about in real time. he has long given up hiding anything from you, and, besides, it feels fresh to just let go.
but right now, as you look into his eyes, you see them swarming with confliction, pain, and worry.
he doesn’t scold you about not going right now because he knows that you will tell him that you either thought it wasn’t a big deal or that you didn’t want to bother shoko with it.
instead, he settles on a hushed whisper of “can I see it?”
you throw him a confused look, “why? I am getting it treated tomorrow anyway,” then you smile, “it’s not going to permanent if that’s what you’re worried about.”
he shakes his head, “it’s not that; I just—“ he takes a deep breath then looks at you pleadingly, “just let me see it.”
perhaps it’s to silence his thoughts and to show him that you’re truly okay, as okay as you can be.
you’re still alive, and that’s what matters, he thinks. nevertheless, he feels the need to see just how serious is the wound anyway.
reluctantly, you slowly take off your jacket to reveal the poorly bandaged gash on your arm.
he looks up at you, asking for permission because even if he needs to see it for his own selfish reasons, he has to put you above anything and everything else.
you nod, giving the free reign to slowly take off the bandages. you can barely hold back any pained noises, but you can’t help the wincing of your body.
satoru’s frown deepens, and with every move, your husband’s heart aches. it goes like that until the wound is finally unveiled.
you feel satoru observing the cut so intently that you look away. satoru curses everything that he can think of, and never has we wanted the ability to heal others more than right now.
he straightens his back, “that’s a deep cut, y’know.”
“I know…”
“you also realize that the wound could’ve hit your chest and inevitably heart, right?”
you huff, “listen, if you’re going to give me a lecture or keep making me feel bad about it then I will have you know—“
“you could’ve died.”
you notice the strain in his voice, so you turn to finally look eyes with him. he looks pained, so hurt, maybe even terrified at the fact that there was a chance that he could’ve lost you.
your expression immediately becomes that of sympathy, “but I didn’t, and dwelling on the fact that I might’ve died will only bother you for no reason,” you hold his hand, “I am here and alive, aren’t I?”
your husband sighs, resting his head on your right shoulder, “you’re hurting my poor little heart whenever you put yourself in danger like that.”
a giggle escapes your lips, and your hands naturally find their way in his hair, fingers gently carding through, “whatever shall we do.”
“if things went my way then you would just stay home looking all pretty like you always do,” he states, and you roll your eyes.
“well, they’re going my way tonight, so—“ the clock strikes twelve, “happy birthday, silly boy.”
his eyes widen and he pulls away to look you in the face. he blinks dumbly then looks at what’s in your hands: a cupcake with a candle.
a wide grin of unbridled joy appears on your husband’s face. his eyes shimmer in the moonlight as he laughs, “I really didn’t expect it this time!”
“you outdid yourself, pretty girl,” he hums, hand caressing your cheek.
“I still have a lot more things for you,” you beam with pride. satoru can’t contain himself anymore, and he pulls you into a loving embrace.
“I love you so much,” he murmurs beside your ear, pressing a light kiss to the side of your neck.
you pat his back, “I love you too, ‘toru,” you laugh, “but you’re pressing on my wound, and I think I am just going to cry and not because of overwhelming love.”
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do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported
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THE MOMENT I KNEW | Max Verstappen
Max Verstappen x Girlfriend!Reader
SUMMARY: After a few races where he didn't get the results he expected, Max decides to go out with some friends to disconnect from everything. Unluckily, one of those days when he arrives home after having some drinks, he finds out that he missed his girlfriend's birthday as soon as he sees the cake she ordered on the trash ↳ REQUESTED BY ANON: Maybe something angsty?? Like maybe bro goes out with his friends and forgets readers bday until he sees the cake in the trash can and realizes bro screwed up
WORD COUNT: 2007
WARNINGS: Curse words, mentions of being drunk, angst
TAGLIST: @hc-dutch @raavadakedavra @coffeedestroyingperson @evey-kuznetskova @bowielovesyou @chaoswithus @isotopemylove @iceman-kazansky @gwginnyweasley @formula1-motogpfan @myescapefromthislife @regalbanshee [in case you wanna be tagged just tell me so i can add you!]
VEE'S NOTES: I've absolutely loved this one my God. With this fic, we mark a total of 6196 words written this week (not counting my uni essays and other several projects), so I'm quite proud about that! Also, thank you so much for the support all this week, hope you liked all the fics! I'll be uploading this upcoming week's posts tomorrow. Let me know in the comments or on the anon inbox your thoughts on this one! See you next week :) ↳ MAKE YOUR REQUESTS | LET'S TALK! | JANUARY UPDATE CALENDAR
© VETTELSVEE (2025). please, do not steal, copy or translate my works. thanks for reading!
Max stumbled into your apartment, fumbling with the keys and opening the door with trembling hands, his pounding headache reminding him that it wouldn’t be this bad if he’d listened to the bartender’s advice to stop after the last gin tonic.
As soon as he stepped inside, he froze in the doorway, scanning everything as if it were his first time entering the place, even though he had been living there for nearly five years, the last two with you. He took a few unsteady steps toward the small entryway counter, where he dropped his keys and realized the silence was far heavier than he had anticipated.
His laughter, faint and fueled by the false sense of security that alcohol had provided, quickly dissipated. Taking a cautious step further into the living room, he noticed there were no lights on, no plates or leftover food on the small coffee table in front of the TV, and most strikingly, you were neither sprawled out on the couch watching one of the romantic movies you adored nor curled up asleep with one of your cats.
Despite the glaring signs, Max didn’t panic, at least not as much as he should have, even though something inside him whispered that the situation didn’t sit right.
It wasn’t until he wandered into the kitchen to get a glass of water and rounded the island that his foot stumbled slightly, nearly sending him sprawling to the floor. Puzzled, he looked down to see what had caused him to trip. His heart sank when his eyes landed on a discarded box, its lid broken as if it had been thrown to the floor, angrily, on purpose.
That’s when reality hit him like a freight train.
He turned his gaze to the left, where the trash can stood partially open. Inside, he saw an untouched cake, decorated with intricate floral designs and a message that read, “Happy Birthday, Y/N!” The sight struck him like a blow to the chest, the pressure so intense it made him want to vomit.
“No… No, it wasn’t today…”
Desperately, and trying to figure out what to do, Max ran his hands through his hair, as if that might somehow help him calm down. His breathing grew more erratic with each passing second, his eyes glued to the cake. It didn’t feel real. He couldn’t understand how he had managed to forget such an important date… you, his girlfriend’s, birthday. Something so obvious had suddenly spiraled into a waking nightmare.
He noticed his phone sitting on the kitchen counter. Grabbing it quickly, he checked for any missed calls or messages from you, only to realize after several failed attempts to turn it on that it was dead. He blamed his drunkenness not only for not noticing he didn’t have his phone with him or that it was out of battery, but for forgetting such a meaningful day and breaking every promise he had made to you.
Deep down, though, he knew all the excuses were hollow. Any justification he tried to offer would be nothing but foolishness.
Setting the phone back on the counter, he decided not to waste any more time. He headed toward your bedroom. The door was ajar, and though the lights were off, he could make out your silhouette lying on the bed, your back turned to him. You gave no sign that you had noticed his arrival. The only sound in the room was your muffled, quiet sobs. As Max stepped closer, he saw you were clutching a pillow tightly, as if it were your only source of comfort.
That was the moment Max realized he couldn’t avoid facing the situation, no matter how impossible it felt to fix things right away.
“Y/N...” he said softly.
You didn’t answer, and your silence hurt more than a thousand words could have. Max knelt beside the bed, close enough to reach out, and gently began stroking your face. You didn’t resist his touch, but your indifference pierced him deeply.
“I’m so sorry,” he murmured, his voice trembling as he fought to hold himself together. “I swear this wasn’t my intention… I wanted to come home earlier, but Lando insisted we stay a bit longer, and then I didn’t have my phone…”
“You forgot, Max,” you interrupted, your tone sharp but laced with pain, anger, and sadness. You still wouldn’t look at him. “Goddammit, Max, you forgot my fucking birthday ever since the moment the clock struck midnight.”
Max fell silent. Once again, reality hit him square in the face, forcing him to acknowledge that anything he said would likely be inadequate. He moved to sit on the edge of the bed, trying to find the words to explain himself calmly, to admit his mistakes while grappling with the weight of his guilt.
“You know it wasn’t my intention,” he began, his voice low. “It’s just… with the shitty season I’ve been having and everything that comes with it, I’ve been feeling overwhelmed. I just needed to step out of my comfort zone for a bit, to clear my head…”
“And you thought doing that on my birthday, after promising me a dream day, was the most appropriate choice?” you cut him off, finally raising your head. Your eyes were swollen and red from crying. “I know you’re not in a good place right now, but I also know that until now, every promise you’ve made to me, you’ve kept. You didn’t just forget about me, Max. You left me here, alone, all day, like I didn’t matter at all.”
Max searched desperately for a way to salvage the situation, to apologize, to do something, anything, to prove how deeply sorry he was. But when you turned on the light and sat up to face him, he realized he was out of options. He didn’t know how to continue without disappointing you further.
“You know this has been really hard for me…”
“Hard for you? Seriously?” you interrupted, leaning closer and pointing your finger at him. “And you think this has been easy for me? Watching you shut me out, never telling me what’s going on in that head of yours? Not to mention your fans… They’re fully convinced that your shitty season is all my fault, that our relationship is ruining your career.”
“Y/N, I know…”
That was a lie. He didn’t know. Max had ignored the comments and criticism because, deep down, he believed you weren't to blame for his performance, especially when you rarely even went with him to the races anymore.
“There’s nothing I can say to argue with you,” Max admitted. “You’re absolutely right. I’ve been a complete asshole today, and I’m truly sorry. I love you, Y/N, more than you know…”
“Are you sure you love me?” you shot back, your voice trembling with anger. “Do you love me, or your damn career? Because lately, it feels like your whole world revolves even more around cars, races, speed, adrenaline, and your constant need to be the best at everything.”
“Hey…” Max tried, his voice faltering.
“Every day, you show me more and more that we’re no longer a team… that I’m no longer a part of you. And I know I’m not the only one who sees it.”
Your words hit him like a dagger, but he knew he deserved them.
“It’s not just about you forgetting my birthday today, Max. It’s everything. You don’t listen to me… you don’t give me anything, not even a minute of your day, let alone affection or support. Why should I stay in a relationship that, instead of giving me life, is killing me inside?”
Your words struck him like a bucket of ice water.
“You don’t get it, do you?” you asked, frustration and sadness mingling in your tone as he stayed silent. “If you really loved me, you wouldn’t be afraid to show me who you are, flaws and all. But you’ve always done this, Max, keeping me at arm’s length, never letting me into your life.”
“I don’t do that, Y/N, it’s just that…” he began, summoning his courage to explain, but you cut him off once again.
“Damn it, Max, yes, of course you do!” you yelled, your voice cracking under the weight of your emotions. “Do you realize that even though I’ve been with you, I’ve been completely alone? Alone, Max, utterly alone! I’ve tried so many times to talk to you, to make you see that a few bad races aren’t the end of the world for someone like you, but…”
You stopped yourself abruptly, your throat aching and your head pounding. You felt no remorse for the way you were speaking to him since he deserved every word, but you couldn’t help but feel a deep sadness. Sadness for the Max Verstappen you had once known. A man who had been so proud of himself and his achievements after years of hard work, now emotionally shattered and, worse, so determined to hide it from everyone, including you.
“I can’t keep giving you everything I have while you keep taking and taking, without giving anything back.”
“I’m sorry…” Max muttered, but the words felt hollow.
“A simple ‘I’m sorry’ doesn’t fix anything, Max,” you replied, your voice quieter now but no less wounded. “I wish it were just about today, but like I said, I feel like you’re pushing me further out of your life with every passing day. You’re becoming a stranger to me, Max,” you admitted, trying not to let your voice waver. “You’ve been like this for months, and I don’t know what else to do to stop us from falling apart… though it feels like that’s exactly what you want.”
“That’s not true,” he answered immediately, desperation in his voice. “Y/N, seriously, I love you more than you could ever imagine.”
“Are you sure?” you asked, tears welling up again. “Because I feel like you’re showing me the exact opposite.” Your voice trembled with the weight of her words. “Sometimes it feels like you love your career, the success you’ve achieved and the crowds chanting your name more than you love me.”
“I’m sorry,” he whispered again, his voice barely audible. “You know I want to, but… I don’t know how to fix this anymore…”
You looked at him, your eyes searching his face for some sign, some silent promise that would make you believe things between you could change. But Max’s words only made you realize that you had to stop thinking fantasies and start facing reality.
“Maybe you can’t fix it,” you confessed, the words breaking you from the inside. “I can’t keep going like this, Max… I can’t keep feeling like I’m not enough… like I’m not good enough for you.”
“Seriously, there has to be a solution…” he pleaded, his voice full of regret. “I’ll do better from now on, I promise…”
“You don’t get it, do you?” You turned to look at him, the pain evident in your expression. “Things won’t magically get better if you take me to dinner or buy me a million-dollar necklace to make up for today. That won’t fix anything, Max…”
“Y/N… Y/N, please… I need you…”
No matter how many times Max said those words, he knew that any promise he made now would be meaningless, especially considering how much he had already failed you.
Feeling that there were no more words left to say between them, you slowly got out of bed. You gathered the few belongings you had on the nightstand and, with a sense of finality, began to pack a bag, all the while feeling Max’s powerless gaze on you.
“I can’t keep waiting, Max,” you said, her voice steady despite the anguish inside. “Today, no matter how much I tried to turn a blind eye, let it go, and even put myself in your shoes… This… everything… after many tries… God, Max, all of this… That was the moment I knew.”
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