#it's fine because he's in love with wangji anyway uncle

[mxtxfanatic]

Lan Wangji's Mementos Pt. 1

One of the cutest things about Lan Wangji's expressions of love is that the man is a hoarder. There is not a single thing that Wei Wuxian has given him that he has not not secretly kept, because everything that Wei Wuxian has given him—no matter how small, no matter how annoyed he pretended to be—he considers as a precious gift:

Notes and Sketches:

Wei Wuxian was so peeved that he rolled over his mat, climbed up, and wrote another. He slapped it in front of Lan Wangji, who crumpled it into a ball and threw it away again. The Silencing Spell didn’t lift until after Wei Wuxian had finished his copying. The second day, upon re-entering the Library Pavilion, he discovered that all of the wads of paper littering the floor had been removed.

...

But sure enough, Wei Wuxian grew tired and miserable after not too long, and started to lapse back into his old bad habits. He sent a piece of paper over to Lan Wangji and pestered him to take a look. Lan Wangji thought it would contain yet more random, pointless nonsense, but some god or demon must have induced him to glance over it anyway. Surprisingly, it was actually a remarkably true-to-life portrait, portraying a figure sitting upright and still, reading quietly under the light streaming through the window. The figure was, in fact, Lan Wangji himself.

—Chapt. 15: Elegance V, fanyiyi

Flowers:

As Lan WangJi pondered with downcast eyes, he suddenly felt something weigh onto his head. He raised his hand. A pink medicinal peony, at the peak of its bloom, had landed flawlessly on the side of his head. From on top of a building came a grinning voice, “Lan Zhan—ah, no, HanGuang-Jun—what a coincidence!” Lan WangJi looked up to see an airy pavilion lined with layers and layers of gauze curtains. A black-robed man lay on his side over a red lacquer divan. One hand of his slender body dangled down, holding a fine liquor jar made of black clay. Half of the jar’s crimson tassel wrapped around his arm, while the other half swayed back and forth in the air.

—Chapt. 71: Departure, exr

Lan WangJi’s bookmark was a dried flower in a light shade. It had been kept with much care, its color as vibrant ever. The petals and the veins were so delicate that it seemed to be alive. Between pages, it let off a soft aroma. Wei WuXian picked out the bookmark and asked, “Herb peony?” Lan WangJi, “Mn.”

—Chapt. 65: Tenderness, exr

Bunnies:

Hastily, he said, “Hey, can’t you be less scary? I’m here to give you a present and apologize for my wrongdoings.” Without even considering the offer, Lan Wangji refused. “I do not want it.” “You really don’t?” Wei Wuxian asked. He saw a guarded note in Lan Wangji’s gaze. As though he was performing a magic trick, he pulled two bunnies from the chest area of his robes. He held the two chubby, perfectly round snowballs by the ears. The snowballs were still kicking around wildly when Wei Wuxian placed them before Lan Wangji’s eyes. “Your mountain is strange. There aren’t any pheasants, but there’s lots of wild bunnies who aren’t even afraid of people. So how about it? Aren’t they fat little things? Don’t you want them?”

—Chapt. 18: Elegance VIII, fanyiyi

The Lan WangJi at this point in time was also just about sixteen. He frowned slightly, as though he was worried about something. What he held in his arm was a white rabbit, sniffing its pink nose, and beside his foot was another rabbit, its long ears perked up as it stood clinging to his boot, trying to climb up. Lan XiChen, “How could the casual remarks between two boys be considered a serious promise? Is it really because of this?” Lan WangJi looked at the ground and said nothing. Lan XiChen smiled, “Fine. Then if by any chance Uncle asks of this, you must explain things to him properly. These days, you have been spending just a little too much time on them.”

—Chapt. 119: Incense Burner Extra, exr

Wei Wuxian touched the back of [Little Apples's] neck and thought about the jade passage tokens the juniors carried while pointing at the round, white rabbits covering the ground. “I’m really not allowed to cook them? So if I cooked them, I’d be chased off the mountain?” As though facing a major enemy, Lan Jingyi opened his arms and stepped in front of him immediately. “These are Hanguang Jun’s rabbits. We just help watch them once in a while. Don’t you dare cook them!”

—Chapt. 19: Sunshine I, fanyiyi

+1 The memento Lan Wangji never received:

That night was the first time Lan WangJi ever drank, as well as the first time he was inebriated. He had no memories of what he did when he was drunk. For a long time, all of the Lan Sect’s people, no matter disciple or cultivator, held disbelief in their eyes when they looked at him. Some said that night he broke through the storage room of the Cloud Recesses, ransacking the chests in search of who-knew-what. When Lan XiChen asked, he said he wanted a flute, his eyes lost. Lan XiChen gave him the finest flute made of white jade, yet he threw it away in fury, saying this wasn’t the one he wanted.

—Chapt. 111: Wangxian, exr

Pt. 2

[mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess]

Como dientes en el alma

Song that inspired the title, idea is from this and the one post I made about wanting to write a prompt based off "you drew stars/around my scars/and now i'm bleeding"

This is so sweet and emotional, it made me miss writing angst and killing blorbos.

Have fun and don't get used to it <3

Lan Wangji passes by that place every morning when he takes A-Yuan to school. It's still the same as always, the same as back then, a little shop facing the main street, high windows with tattoo displays on them and a light up sign that hasn't flashed in over a decade.

"You don't look like the tattoo type." He laughs, and it lights up his whole face, his handsome features softening. His lip piercing glistens under the white neon lights, and for a moment, Lan Wangji forgets he's nervous at all. "Is there any occasion you're doing this for?"

"For... my mother, she's... gone."

There have been many rumors. Some said he ran away, others said he killed himself, or was disposed of. Most people shook their head and moved on with their lives.

Sometimes, Lan Wangji wishes he did too. Wishes he could.

It's been so long.

"Have you thought where you'd like it done?"

"It must be somewhere hidden. My workplace is...strict. As is my family."

He laughs again, and Lan Wangji finds himself yearning for the sound, wanting to remember it forever, melodious, sincere. Light shines on his face, his stormy eyes glistening with mirth, and Lan Wangji irrationally wonders what it would be like to hear that laughter forever.

"How about your arm? There's plenty of space there, I see." a wink, and Lan Wangji's ears flare red.

"Alright."

"I'll do my best so it doesn't hurt too much, but you'll hate me when I'll start to color it in, so heads up for that."

"It is fine, I am used to pain."

He smiles, but this time it's in sympathetic understanding, hiding something dark and painful beneath, "I am too. Doesn't mean you have to like it."

The tattoo is still there, beautiful etched into his skin. It hurt, but not nearly as much as everything else in his life - before that, and after - did. He still catches himself admiring it in the shower, or as he's getting ready in the mirror.

"Do you want to talk about your mother? It'll help distract you, you seem tense."

Lan Wangji was tense, but not because of the procedure, the other's touch electrifying, the closeness, intoxicating. But, indeed, this was about Lan Wangji's mother. And he never really got to talk to anyone about her.

It's comforting, to know there are still pieces of him into the world, scattered in the crowd, carrying his mastery, his touch, his soul, his creativity.

His love.

"My mom died too. Both my parents did. And I... I don't really remember them anymore. I was 3 or 4 years old when it happened, and then I lived on the streets for a while before uncle Jiang found me and took me in. I always wanted to find a way to make sure I wouldn't ever forget important things again and... well, you can never forget to look at your skin, right?"

It was impossible for Lan Wangji not to fall in love with him. Anyone would have. Such a kind, considerate, playful person, so beautiful, so artistic with everything he did - it was as if, with every move of his tools, Wei Wuxian didn't just leave his mark on Lan Wangji's body, but on his soul too.

"I...this is really unprofessional of me and I really shouldn't be doing this, but... frankly, I like you." The blush decorates Wei Wuxian's face so beautifully and Lan Wangji feels his own cheeks burn, his heart beating wildly in his chest. He smiles, shy, but with a glint in his eyes "And I think you like me too, because you've been here almost every day, and the 'I'm worried about healing' excuse is getting old."

Busted - but Lan Wangji knew it wasn't that good of an excuse anyway. However, he's done with excuses - and he pulls Wei Wuxian into a kiss instead, fully accountable and open about his intention.

And so incredibly happy.

Lan Wangji has three tattoos. The gentian flower, in memory of his mother, on his right arm, a pair of bunnies, a tribute to the love he and Wei Wuxian shared and...

Lan Wangji traces his fingers over the crudely drawn brand on Wei Wuxian's chest.

"This isn't yours." He says, and kisses over it, softly, as if the skin had yet to heal.

"No, it isn't... It was a... punishment. I pissed off the wrong people and I paid for it."

"Why didn't you remove it?"

"There are some things you can't erase, Lan Zhan, regardless of whether they show on your skin or not."

Lan Wangji remembered the symbol precisely - the lines, the contours of it, the sun it supposedly represents - and had it done too. Wanted to do it himself at first, drunk and mad with grief, but ultimately decided against it. Wei Wuxian wouldn't want him to die the same way he almost did.

"How about we get matching tattoos?" He asked one morning as he hopped onto the kitchen counter, coffee in hand, all but inviting Lan Zhan to kiss him.

He did, hungry and wanting as always, but Wei Ying seemed insistent on having a conversation right then, pushing Lan Zhan away enough so he could catch his breath. "I'm being serious, Lan Zhan, come on."

"So am I." And he kissed down the column of Wei Ying's neck as if to prove a point, hands sliding over the painted skin of his thighs.

"Lan Zhan, you're - ahh...- you're not listening to me!"

"I am. You sound pretty."

"That's not - mmh! - you know what, we should just get bunnies, since we're fucking like rabbits anyway!"

Sometimes, Lan Zhan can almost feel it, the gentle touch of Wei Ying's hand, the pinching of the needle, the warmth of being so close to the love of his life and distracting him with kisses when he shouldn't.

"Lan Zhan. Stay still, I mean it. I could really hurt you, and that would break my heart and my license!"

"You should not look so beautiful then."

Wei Ying lifted the tattoo gun off his skin and sighed, loudly. "Mister Lan, I may have to ask someone else to finish your tattoo, because you'll kill me with those words of yours."

Lan Zhan took advantage of the break to get into kissing his lover properly, smiling to himself as they parted and Wei Ying appeared entirely lovestruck, lips kiss-bruised.

"Okay, I'll behave. I don't want anyone but you."

It's been a long time since Lan Wangji has felt anything but hollow. He's been unable - and unwilling - to love anybody else other than his Wei Ying, and he's long resigned to a life of loneliness because of this conviction.

But he does dream, still, of a day when he passes by the old tattoo shop and the neon sign is lit up, the door opened wide, and Wei Wuxian rushing out to greet him, latch his arms around him and give him a sweet, smiling kiss.

Every morning as he passes by the place, his heart stutters with the tiniest surge of excitement.

Maybe there will be someone there today. Maybe, somehow, Wei Wuxian has returned, and he's still pursuing his dream and he still love Lan Wangji.

But the building stays stubbornly empty no matter how hard Lan Wangji hopes it not be so.

---

But one day, 13 years later, the neon sign is lit up and the door is opened. Lan Wangji nearly stumbles out of skin at the sight of the decrepit shop suddenly teeming with life and the distant sound of buzzing needles.

He rushes in, shaking with so much emotion he feels his knees might just give out.

Wei Ying!

The young man at the register glances at him curiously. The name badge on his shirt reads "Mo Xuanyu", and, as if awoken from a dream, Lan Wangji blinks once, twice, and realizes he doesn't recognize anything or anyone in the old establishment.

"Can I help you?" Mo Xuanyu asks, though Lan Wangji feels too shattered to do anything but shake his head.

How could he be so stupid? Of course he won't find Wei Wuxian here. There are other tattoo artists and the building couldn't have stayed abandoned forever.

The world has long moved on.

And Wei Wuxian is...

A voice calls from somewhere deep in the store, and the closer it gets, the more tears gather in Lan Wangji's eyes.

"Xuanyu, did the 10 am appointment arrive yet? I want to go get some co..."

Wei Wuxian stands frozen in the middle of the shop's reception, eyes wide as if unable to comprehend what he's seeing.

The stranger - no, not a stranger, not at all - smiles at him, honeyed and tearful, and Wei Wuxian's body moves before he realizes.

When he's finally in Lan Wangji's arms, and Lan Wangji is in his...

"Is this real, Lan Zhan? Tell me it is, tell me you're really here."

"I am here, Wei Ying. I've always been."

[eleanorfenyxwrites]

WIP Wednesday

So okay I don't know if this is like...a cool thing to do or not, but there's a fic I claimed from the 2022 kink meme list (I couldn't resist, in large part because Tales From Jianghu Shopping Center was listed by the prompter as one of their inspirations for the prompt) that I'm not sure when I'll actually finish writing but I have started it and I'd like to at least acknowledge that I'm doing it even if the prompter won't see this. But the prompt is something along the lines of anything highly specific and niche (like my strip mall AU lol), and I actually happen to have a growing little stockpile of very very niche knowledge about my chosen professional field, which is ceramics! I specialize in wheel-throwing (though I'm also a...passable hand at plaster mold-making/slip casting and handbuilding, I just don't enjoy them nearly as much) so I've started a little something from Lan Wangji's point of view that's a love letter to throwing ♥

--//--

As is tradition, Lan Wangji works in porcelain.

The Lan family have been respected masters of porcelain for centuries, generations stretching back, back, back nearly to the beginning of the imperial kiln production in Jingdezhen. They once produced the enormous pots that adorned emperors’ palaces – there are (very distant) cousins of his in Jingdezhen who still do so for wealthy patrons.

It’s easy to forget such a background when he enters his personal studio on the other side of the world and flicks on the lights to begin the day’s routines. It’s precisely what he wants – a quiet life like this, simple and unassuming, is much more suited to his desire than the weight of tradition that could otherwise press him and his work down into something he would never want to be.

Not that he deviates very far from tradition anyway, but it’s the principle of the thing. Lan Wangji takes quiet pleasure in simplicity, in function that is beautiful in its hard-won mastery. There are very few non-traditional ways to accomplish this that he’s interested in, but he likes having the option should he want to take it. 

Lan Wangji had learned to throw at his uncle’s knee as soon as it was possible to do so. He has continued to do so since childhood with a single-mindedness that once surprised even his uncle. All he’d ever wanted to do was to sit at the wheel for hours and hours on end, only pausing to warm the water in his bowl with a fresh influx from the kettle and to transfer full wareboards (once he was strong enough) to the drying racks in the corner of his uncle’s studio.

Lan Wangji has always struggled to find the words to convey how integral the motion of the wheel and the smooth slip of clay through his finger and against his palms is to feeling like he fits into his skin properly, but his family seems to understand just the same.

Yesterday, as the sun was westering, Lan Wangji had weighed up a few bags of fresh porcelain. The lumps are waiting for him now, tumbled together under their protective sheets of plastic, ready to be molded and shaped by hands and hypnotic motion. There’s enough of a chill in the studio this time of year that there isn’t any condensation on the plastic when he lifts it, so he folds it away neatly and settles into the easy rhythm of wedging his clay to prepare it for the wheel.

There is, in the middle of the studio, a sturdy butcher’s block workbench. He built it himself right there in the studio, the first piece of furniture that had filled the space even before he’d purchased his Shimpo wheel. It’s very likely too heavy to lift – it’s certainly too big to ever get through the door – but he has no intention of ever leaving this studio to begin another, so it suits his purposes just fine.

Wedging the clay on this sturdy, hip-height table is nearly as meditative a process as all the rest of it. A bit more of a workout than sitting at the wheel, but it’s a good way to warm up in the morning, his muscles well accustomed to the push-turn-push-turn-push-turn of spiral wedging that it’s gone beyond second nature, it simply is. His mind wanders pleasantly as he watches the misshapen lumps of pure porcelain become smooth and rounded beneath his palms. Perhaps he’ll spend the day on bowls. They’re quick and simple, suited to his mood today, and he’ll have plenty of them done by lunch when he already knows his typical solitary routine will be interrupted (and can therefore plan for it so far in advance). 

The sun is up properly by the time Lan Wangji finishes his wedging, and once he’s transferred the first batch of prepared clay to the wheel he pauses to stand in the open doorway and look out over the garden that sits between his studio and his home. The grass and the flowers are glittering fresh and dewy in the sunlight as he rolls his shoulders, stretches out his back in preparation to be seated for long hours.

When he returns, the wheel welcomes him, familiar and comforting. He fills an old bird seed bucket with warm water from the tap and arranges the small mirror at the back of the wheel’s tray to the perfect angle to watch his own hands before he settles in and takes a deep breath, sleeves rolled up and apron cinched comfortably tight around his waist as an unnecessary reminder to keep his back as straight as he can while he works.

The first ball of porcelain hits the perfect bullseye of the wheelhead and Lan Wangji leans in to begin centering, the porcelain buttery soft where it runs under his hands. Porcelain, he knows, is notorious for being difficult to work with, particularly for beginners. This far into his career, it’s simply polite and responsive to each confident press of his palms. He cones it first, hands curled around it to coax it in and up; presses it down again with the flat of his hand, every movement focused on the centerpoint of the wheel gliding silently through magnet-powered rotations. 

Up. 

Down again. 

Up.

Down.

Push.

Press.

Lan Wangji loves every part of the throwing process for what it is, but if he were to have to choose only one, this would be his favorite: the moment he can feel the clay running smoothly, perfectly centered the whole way through and ready to become whatever he will tell it to be, the possibilities – for this moment – endless.

[hulijingemperor2]

Yao: *twirling in his Lan furen attire* how do I look, team D?!! And Song'er?

Trio: *clapping* marvelous!! Stunning!!

Su she: if you're the Lan sect leader, I'll go back to the lan sect.

Xue yang: hotter than Lan xichen.

Mo xuanyu: he's always hotter than Lan lips.

Rusong: A-Die, you look gorgeous.

Yao: aww thanks guys.

*throws flowers* orchids for everyone!!

Rusong: haha.

Xue yang: ah Jiggy. My diva.

Su she: *blushing* Huangdi.

Mo xuanyu: *cheering* Yao gege! You're always my orchid!

Yao: great!

Xue yang: Jiggy lanned more than the Lans.

Su she: I know right. This will be my reason to go back to the lan sect. Because of a hot Huangdi.

Yao: ah you all flatter me so much.

But I don't want to blush in front of A-Huan.

Mo xuanyu: you will give him a nosebleed for days.

Xue yang: months!

Mo xuanyu: Jiggy you slay!!

~~~~

.Cloud recesses 📍

Next day, Lan Qiren woke up to see fox spirits having a picnic on his lawn ( along with some students.)

Qiren: hey!!! What are you doing on my lawn!!

Lan students: *running away*

Fox spirits: *bowing* greetings Lan Qiren.

Chen (fox spirit): we were hungry.

Yunxi: and felt a bit mischievous too.

Qiren: all you do is cause trouble!! Picnics and noise aren't allowed in the cloud recesses!

And why is my clay pot broken.

Chen: sorry. Xi meimei had fell on it and it cracked.

Why can't we laugh, old man!

Come on, you're our Huangdi's uncle-in-law.

X: your clay pot was ugly anyways, and it might upset our Huangdi.

Qiren: *sighs* Huangdi my foot!! I'll throw you out of here!!

Yu: heyy you can't do that.

X: Master Qiren, here's a list of Huangdi's favourite meals.

Qiren: do I look like a chef?!

X: well find one na! You maybe have a staff of chefs.

Yu: Huangdi is on his way.

Qiren: then why are you niucences here?!

Yu: we live in Gusu, Lan qiren. And we have decided to come here to get a glimpse of our Huangdi.

Qiren: *crying* what have gotten into this Xichen!! Who told him to marry the emperor of Hulijings!! Who? He's getting just like Wangji!

HUANGDI IS HERE!!!!

The fox spirits almost trampled over qiren, as they rushed to the entrance.

Xichen: *comes out and helps A-Yao out of the caravan*

Yao: *wearing white, teal and coral, with hints of gold, complemented by a white and gold fan. Instead of his hat, he wore Jade and gold peony shaped hairpins and a headband.

Xichen: gorgeous.

Yao: *dimples* oh Huan.

Fox spirits: *awestruck* look at Huangdi!

He's Lan furen!

He's so hot.

Greetings Huangdi!!

Yao: hi darlings.

Huangdi we didn't bring any flowers for you, sorry.

Yao: aw it's ok.

Qiren: *limping*

Xichen: greetings Shufu.

Yao: *bows* greetings uncle-in-law.

Fox spirits: *whispering* omg Huangdi is so graceful.

Qiren: don't use them dimples on me. It isn't going to work.

Yao: *smiling*

Qiren: now why are your hulijing menaces all over cloud recesses and Gusu?

Yao: *demure* I don't know. Maybe they're excited to see me.

Xichen: shufu, it's not A-Yao's fault. Look at how cute he is.

And of course these fox spirits who are Gusu residents would be thrilled to see their Huangdi pass through.

Qiren: *rolls eyes*

I'm glad that you didn't bring those maniacs with you.

Yao: shufu? What maniacs?

Qiren: the former Lan student, that broken finger one who keeps asking about my love life. And that Huadian ghost who looks like Wei wuxian.

Yao: ohhh, you mean team dimple. They're not maniacs.

Yes they are a bit mischievous but they're very sweet when you get to know them. *smile*

Qiren: whatever they are. I'm glad they're not here.

*sarcasm* would you enter please, your majesty.

Xichen: awww.

Qiren: I guess I should arrange a room for you too.

Yao: no uncle-in-law. The Huanshi is fine for me.

A-Yao's attendants: excellent Huangdi!!!

Qiren: *clenches chest* Huan-Shi!!

Yao: yea! Zewu Jun's residence.

Xichen: *blushing* yea my residence. Hehe.

Qiren: NO!! YOU TWO CAN'T SHARE ONE BED!! I won't let you contaminate the cloud recesses with papapa!

We already have wangxian for that!

Xiying: oh dear. Why is he yelling?

Fuying: you shouldn't deny the emperor. If he wishes to sleep with any of his harem members, in a desired place, he can.

Qiren: h-harem member!!!!

Xichen: concubine. Someone who's married to Huangdi along with~~

Qiren: I know what a concubine is!!

Fine. You two. Go to the huanshi.

Xiyao: thank you shufu.

~

Yao: *almost trips, but Xichen caught him*

Xichen: be careful Huangdi.

Is the clothes too big for you?

Yao: no not at all. But you know, I'm just tiny.

Xichen: aww. So that's why you're easily swallowed in cloth.

Yao: yup.

Xichen: *lovingly grabs his hand* should I hold your hand then?

Yao: *cutely nods in agreement*

Xichen: mn.

Yao: Huan, your cloud recesses is beautiful.

Xichen: oh really. I want to show you something near the Huanshi, and in the Huanshi too.

Yao: your surprises are always the best.

Xichen: of course. Heehee.

Yao: but don't be too confident. Team dimple will deduct a point.

Xichen: lol.

I wonder what they're doing.

Yao: hmm maybe hanging out with Song'er.

Xichen: ah. Speaking of Song'er, he's such a great successor of yours. You raised him well.

Yao: thank you!! And Song'er is a natural talent.

Xichen: like you.

Yao: *blush*

Huanhuan, I want to tell you something. But keep it to yourself.

Xichen: sure I will. Tell me.

Yao: A-Song has a crush on someone.

Xichen: what?!!! On who?? That's so great A-Yao!!

Yao: on A-Qing.

Xichen: that's really cute!

Yao: and I want to bring them together.

Xichen: you should, A-Yao. You know I'm a matchmaker too. And all were successful.

Yao: yes yes. Wangxian is definitely successful.

Xichen: I shipped other people too, A-Yao. Not only Wangxian.

Yao: then who else, Huan. *laugh*

Xichen: ummm......I ship Sangcheng.

Yao: ok ok. Let's say you brought them together.

Xichen: I say you should send Song'er to a spring and then tell A-qing to take a walk near that same spring. Works every time.

Yao: Huan no. Lol.

But I'll set up some dates for them, secretly. And I have Zixuan.

Xichen: right. Team up with him. Since that he's A-Song's uncle.

Yao: yup. Zish and I will make a team!

Yao: *hugs his arm* Song'er don't want me to tell team dimple, because they might tease him.

Xichen: *laughing* oh no.

Poor Song'er.

Yao: baby don't want to be teased.

Yao: anyways, speaking of them, what do you have to say about the random team dimple. Do they annoy you? *laughing*

Xichen: never! I love everything associated with you.

Yao: lovely!

Xichen: sorry about shufu calling them maniacs.

Yao: it's alright. My team dimple are extremely intelligent and skilled in everything. Down to simping. And I don't care what anyone says about them.

Xichen: aww. I love it when you stand firmly on what you believe in. You're extraordinary. *kisses* love you.

A-Yao.

Yao: A-Huan.

Xichen: you look so cute with that forehead ribbon. And those hairpins.

Yao: *smile*

Xichen: truly a graceful Huangdi.

Yao: thank you very much, A-Huan.

Xichen: Huangdi.

Yao: hmm?

Xichen: do you want to admire the moon together later? And have some wine.

Yao: wine?? In the cloud recesses???

Xichen: no one knows what I hide in my Huanshi.

Do you think that only Wangji can do that?!

And besides, I'm married to a diva emperor. Obviously I must cater for him.

Yao: *opens fan* how mischievous.

But I like it.

Do you sneak in meat??

Xichen: no. I'm still vegetarian.

But I LOVE your Yunping delicacies.

I would eat a little chicken, but only when it's made by you.

Yao: awwww.

Xichen: it reminds me of when you saved me.

Yao: Xichen you're the cutest thing.

What else did you sneak into the Huanshi?

Xichen: maybe roasted chicken at some time. But I didn't like it. Because it was from Gusu.

Yao: then what else?

Xichen: you.

Yao: *blushing intensly* Zewu Jun. What....what if....people hear you....omg.

Xichen: *yelling* I SNUCK A-YAO INTO THE HUANSHI!!!!

Qiren in the distance: *almost faints* shameless!

Yao: hahahaha stop!

So Zewu Jun. Can we have a music session like old times?

Xichen: of course. And you're so excellent at playing the guqin. You're a guqin prodigy.

Yao: you're the one who taught me originally.

Xichen: I believe that you knew how to play it already. And just practiced with me.

*teasing* maybe you pretended to not know how to play the guqin, so that you can spend alone time with me.

Yao: did it work?

Xichen: yes. And now I'm fully seduced by you.

Yao: happy?

Xichen: very.

Yao: good. *tiptoes to kiss him*

Xichen: *kisses*

Yao: where's your flute, Xichen?

Xichen: which flute?

Yao: *hits him with his fan* er ge!!

Xichen: I learnt that from Wangji. He once asked Wei Gongzi the same thing and that was the answer.

Yao: oh my!

Xichen: Anyways. Liebing is here. At the emperor's service *bows* and delight.

Yao: *giggling* er ge. You're making me laugh. You're so cute.

Xichen: because I feel like I'm in love.

Yao: maybe you are.

Xichen: mhm.

Xichen: here's the Huanshi, A-Yao!

And look, I planted peonies.

Yao: aww, er ge!! It's gorgeous. I love it so much!!

Xichen: *wraps his arm around him* for my peony.

Yao: *hugs*

*entering the Huanshi*

Yao: beautiful house, er ge. As always.

Xichen: yep. And look, I set up a little fox spirit shrine in the corner.

Yao: how sweet.

*sits*

Xichen: sometimes I would offer flowers.

Yao: aw. Does Lan qiren know?

Xichen: nop. What happens in the Huanshi stays in the Huanshi.

Yao: hmmm. Lan lips has secrets.

Xichen: don't tell team dimple.

Yao: *laughing* I'll think about that.

Xichen: they'll interrogate me more.

Yao: but I like when they interrogate you.

Xichen: oh my! Well at least it entertains you.

And I know that you're their everything.

Yao: right.

Xichen: *kisses his hands* Diva. Would you have a music session with me?

Yao: *blushing* I would love to.

Xichen: *pulls out his liebing*

Yao: *makes his guqin appear*

Xichen: let's see if Huangdi is still an excellent guqin player.

Yao: well, you're here to teach me, if I mess up.

Xichen: mhm.

Yao: *blushing*

Xichen: *plays his flute*

Yao: *plays guqin.

[drwcn]

I can’t wait for more of your discordance au, I’m a sucker for angsty wangxian! I’m actually really curious about what’s going on with Lan Xichen the whole time he’s gone. Is he recovering for all that time or is there some political plot he needs to take care of? I saw that courtesan Meng Yao tag too which makes me even more intrigued 👀👀👀

Awww you guys >:) Thank you so much for the encouragement. 

Unfortunately, Xichen and Huaisang are not a pair. The hidden agenda of this fic is xiyao (lol sorrah), and I know people tend to feel either YAY or NAY about xiyao so I’ve totally separated the wangixan and xiyao part. You can read one without the other and it wouldn’t make much of a difference at all. At best Meng Yao is mentioned in end of the later wangxian parts once or twice. 

I love Xiyao because I think it’s full of possibilities. Obviously canon!xiyao is tragic and problematic af, but this is an au, so... I do ...what I...want? Meng Yao in this au is his own worst nightmare - a courtesan, and Zewu-jun is the handsome polite gentlemanly amnesiac he saves. 

Below cut are more reasons why Lan Qiren longs for the sweet release of an early qi deviation (arc synopsis of lan xichen & meng yao’s half of the story). 

Lan Xichen’s Arc: where politics turned deadly.

Well, just because Wen Ruohan isn’t a thing doesn’t meant the Yin Irons aren’t a thing. Is there political bullshit waiting to happen? Absolutely. Except our protagonists are proactive this time. 

For months, both Qinghe and Gusu have been getting reports of strange sightings along their Lanling borders. NMJ and LXC have been investigating, and they suspect that JGS may have had something to do with it. Prior to Lan Xichen’s disappearance, he was getting close to finding out the truth. 

What happened was this: 

Xue Yang (who will exist solely in other people’s narration) had killed the Changs and taken a piece of the Yin Iron. Upon capture, XXC and SL (both alive and well and doing their own thing) delivered him to the Chief Cultivator, thinking justice has been served. (Lol. no.). Once JGS got his hands on one of those, he began to plan world domination bad things with it and shit started acting fucky right away, eliciting the suspicion and subsequent investigations of the Lans and Nies. 

Jin Guangshan does wonder how his secrets are being leaked, but he doesn’t get to find out until the end. 

Lan Xichen, on his part, is fairly sure of what’s been causing the appearances of these so called “fierce corpses”. He knows about Lan Yi’s barrier in the Cold Cave, and suspects someone has gotten their hands on a piece of the Yin Iron. Both he and Nie Mingjue suspect Jin Guangshan, and have been quietly collecting proof. 

Jin Guangshan, not about to be defeated so easily, sets up a trap and ambushes Lan Xichen during one of his investigations. LXC was in “plain clothes” as part of the investigation, because it’s dumb to go around investigating dressed as the Sect Leader of Gusu Lan, but during the ambush, Lan Xichen loses Liebing and Shuoyue in the process.  The only thing he has on him is Shuoyue’s sheath when he is found by Meng Yao. 

When Lan Xichen wakes up, he doesn’t remember anything or who he is. He sees a pretty young man who introduces himself as Lianfang. Lan Xichen was wearing blue when he was found, so “Liangfang” calls hims A-Lan. 

Meng Yao’s tragic back story that’s actually tragic:

The bullshit - er, the story - as always, starts with Meng Yao getting kicked down the steps at Jinlintai by his Ho™ of a dad Jin Guangshan. In this universe, Jin Guangshan isn’t just a rich powerful Sect Leader, but also the Chief Cultivator. If anything, he has more reason than ever to make sure Meng Yao isn’t around to besmirch his good name (not that he has any good name to bismirch).

Claiming Meng Yao to be a liar, Jin Guangshan ordered his goons to have Meng Yao “taken care of”, but before that could happen, Madam Jin had come out to see what was the commotion. This was Zixuan’s birthday celebration after all, everything had to be perfect. 

What she saw certainly enraged her, but her husband was about to kill a boy, possibly his own son, spill blood on their son’s day of birth celebration. Such cosmic bad karma she couldn’t possibly accept. “You don’t have to kill him, you absolute buffoon, just make sure he never comes back here!” 

She meant buy his silence with money but Jin Guangshan had a more permanent solution.

Before the day’s out, Meng Yao was sold to a brothel, and was told “that’s where you belong”.  Once, perhaps, he had dreamed about gaining the love of his father, but no longer. Now he simply wants his father ruined and dismembered. 

But first he has to live. 

The madam of the brothel had a keen eye for “good merchandise”, and one good look at young Meng Yao with those big eyes, delicate frame and dimples and she knew she could make big bucks off of him. 

(And before anyone asks how old MY is here, the answer is: young. One of the many reasons why I would personally like to volunteer to stab JGS until it looks like he’s been cursed with the Thousand Holes Curse.) 

The first couple of years were decidedly grim for MY. He was kept away from customers (mercifully), but he was a brutally trained in the art of dance and music. They kept him fed enough to dance but not too much to “ruin his figure”. His instructors quickly found that the youth was a quick study and got up no matter how many times he was trampled on (literally and metaphorically). It was no secret that life was gruesome, but Meng Yao survived. Meng Yao made his debut. Meng Yao became famous.

The establishment where he made his debut renamed him Lianfang - to collect/gather fragrance - and so from then on, he became Lianfang-gongzi. Soon, his art (and other stuff) caught the eye of an obliging patron who purchased him from the madam. 

The patron, by all accounts, was a brute of man who had more appreciation for the liquor in his cup than the arts, but he was a cultivator, wealthy enough, connected to many other cultivator gentry familiues, and most importantly, led a subsidiary clan of the Chief Cultivator. As his prized courtesan and dancer, Meng Yao served at his whim, entertained at his parties and made happy his friends, all of whom were practicing cultivators or at the very least connected to the cultivation realm. 

Our evil gremlin would not be our evil gremlin if he didn’t make the best of every situation. Meng Yao quickly discovered that not only was he particularly talented at getting people to divulge information to him, but that men were significantly uninhibited after sex and alcohol. Armed with a sweet face, an eidetic memory, and a hate inside him that longed to see Jin Guangshan severed limp by limp, he began his revenge plot. 

(Here, I took inspiration from Nirvana in Fire’s character Princess Xuanji of the fallen Hua kingdom who was sold into servitude but established Hong’xiu’zhao, a spy network of girls/women who either worked as courtesans or secondary spouses of noblemen. Her goal was to create chaos and dissension within the royal court and government, like mites eating away at a large tree from within.) 

Meng Yao amassed an enormous amount of intels on gentry families and evidences of the many underhanded conducts of the Chief Cultivator himself. He did this through his own work and through the other women working in his network, all of whom have been wrongfully aggrieved in some way. He promised them that one day he would help them to freedom. 

For five years he’s been collecting secrets of gentry families, and had been stirring discord for three, weakening their cohesiveness, and using their growing animosity to weaken Jin Guangshan’s control on his subordinates. Naturally, Meng Yao heard about Xue Yang and the Yin Iron. It was also him who had been drawing attention to it for the other major sects. 

Meng Yao doesn’t know Lan Xichen is the Sect Master of Gusu Lan, but he has no interest in hurting a man from nowhere. “You can stay here with me until you are better. After that, I’m afraid I’ll have to ask you to be on your way.”

Physically Lan Xichen recovered quickly, but when it was clear his memories wouldn’t be coming back, Meng Yao allowed him to stay. 

The rest, as they say, is history. 

~

Meng Yao has been Lianfang, been the famed courtesan, for longer than he cares to remember. He’s been had, used, and passed around by so many men that their faces are just blurried sillouettes in his memory. And yet, he’s never felt for a moment that he belonged to any of them, not even his patron, who possessed his contract and could resell him back to a lesser establishment and ruin him in a heartbeat. 

But when A-Lan held him in his eyes, warm and dark like a summer’s night, without judgement or expectations, only gentle sweetness and a fond regard, Meng Yao could almost pretend he was just A-Yao, the name whispered reverently by those soft lips. The hand that held his moved to stroke his cheek, almost shy, and Meng Yao realized with a fearful pang that if this man from nowhere with nothing were to ask, Meng Yao could most definitely become his. 

The thought scared him more than he was willing to admit. 

~

The message delivered by the pigeon was clear. Meng Yao crumbled the slip of paper in his hand, then set it aflame in the candlelight. 

The man who’s been living with him for the past four months, who he knew as A-Lan, who he trusted enough to take to bed, was the Sect Master of Gusu Lan: Lan Huan, Lan Xichen.

Zewu-jun.  

Everyone, even a non-cultivator such as himself, has heard of Gusu’s Wei Wuxian, Lan Xichen’s young widower, left alone after not even six months of marriage. 

But if even he wasn’t married, Lan Xichen could never accept him as he was, no matter now much his personal desire wanted him. 

His hands shook. He balled them into fists. 

Meng Yao should’ve known... he should’ve known it was too good to be true. 

No matter, he told himself. This too, is an opportunity, perhaps the only one I will ever have. I will use it to destroy Jin Guangshan once and for all. 

~

Lan Xichen made his way to the window, and gazed out into the courtyard where A-Yao was reading under the willow tree. 

You should go home, a voice inside him said. Go home to relief Wangji of his burden, to release Wuxian from his mourning. Go back to the seat of Sect Master and the responsibilities waiting for you. 

One more day, another voice fought back. Just one more day. 

He doesn’t leave for another month. 

[stiltonbasket]

Can we have more of 15year old lwj wwx interactions at cloud recesses from your fem wwx betrothed au ? I would love to see how mischievous wwx tease and annoy lwj while knowing she is going to his future partner

“I don’t like it,” is all Madam Yu says, when Jiang-shushu announces that Wei Wuxian and her Shijie will be accompanying Jiang Cheng to Gusu. “Mark my words, Jiang Fengmian! You’ll come to regret it, just wait and see.”

“Why? Luo Qingyang from the Jin sect is going, too,” Wei Ying protests. “And anyway, uncle-in-law will be our laoshi. He’ll take care of both of us.”

“I am not worried about A-Li,” Yu-furen snaps. “I am worried about you.”

Wei Wuxian blinks at her. “Huh?”

“A-Xian, Lan Wangji likes you,” Jiang Yanli says gently, “and the standards of propriety are different in Gusu. You’ve never been there before, and it’s possible that you might do something the Lan consider disgraceful without even meaning it. Mother is only concerned for your safety.”

“But the peacock’s going to be there, and you’re coming with me. Can’t I just follow your example, Jie?”

“Lan Wangji likes you,” her sister repeats. A pained look flickers across her eyes, so swiftly that Wei Ying scarcely catches it, and then she leans forward and grasps Wei Ying’s hand. “You can’t treat him the way I treat Zixuan. How could either of you bear it, when he spent his last summer here watching you climb trees with the shimeis and catching you when you fell out of them?”

“Well, I’d hate it,” frowns Wei Wuxian, “but Lan Zhan would probably be relieved. His idea of a good day is ten hours of silent reading, in a library. He won’t even take his books outside unless I make him, and then he says he doesn’t understand why Uncle says my homework demonstrates better comprehension than his—as if Lan Zhan doesn’t know that fresh air and hot hulatang are all anybody needs to help stimulate the mind! It’s a pity that I won’t be able to shake him up in Gusu like I do here, but it can’t be helped.”

Madam Yu looks at Jiang-shushu in despair.

“You see?” she complains. “Suppose Lan Wangji yields to temptation, and they are discovered together? Wei Ying is only sixteen, and their wedding is not set to take place until the year after A-Li’s—if there must be a hasty marriage, we will never be able to hide it! This is folly!”

“I will visit Pan-daifu in the village before we leave,” Shijie says diplomatically. “Just in case we require a—a prescription. For later.”

Wei Wuxian furrows her brow and glances over at Jiang Cheng, who looks just as confused as she does. Shijie always pays a visit to Healer Pan before traveling because of her delicate health, but Wei Wuxian doesn’t understand why bringing that up now would assuage Madam Yu.

“Fine. Fine! If my own daughter believes it meet to flout my wishes, what other recourse do I have?” Yu-furen bites out at last, flicking a water beetle off her sleeve. “And you, Fengmian! If this venture goes ill, on your own head be it!”

__

"Lan Zhan.”

“...”

“Aiyah, Lan Zhan.”

Lan Wangji glances up from his latest composition (an essay titled The Role of Intention in Inquiry and the Contributing Effects of Resentment, by Young Master Lan Wangji) and tries not to shy away from the bright eyes of his betrothed. “Yes?”

“Lan Zhan, you’re ignoring me,” she accuses him. “To think that I traveled all the way from Yunmeng to see you, and you barely give me the time of day! What a neglectful betrothed you are!”

“You are here with me now,” Wangji points out. “I spend more time with you than I do with anyone else, save Shufu and my brother.”

“But I’m only here for the summer. Didn’t I take care of you well at Lotus Pier? You have to pay back the favor now that I’m here.”

Lan Wangji lays his brush aside and folds his hands neatly in his lap, for he had felt a little wretched at the thought of disappointing her. “Then what would you like to do?”

“Well, first I want you to tell me what’s allowed here and what’s not,” Wei Ying says reasonably. “Jiang-shushu’s only rule for us was—”

“I remember!” Lan Wangji interrupts. He was rude just then, he knows, but he doubts he could bear hearing Wei Ying repeat that particular rule in the safety of the Cloud Recesses. The only provision for his continued welcome at Lotus Pier was that he should never be caught alone in a room with his betrothed behind closed doors; other than that, Jiang Fengmian only asked that he accompany Wei Ying to her meals to make sure that she ate on time, and to treat her kindly and defend her if she fell into danger.

Those were simple rules to follow, and Lan Wangji had felt very proud of the trust that came along with them, but to mention them being caught together here in the Cloud Recesses—

“Why is your face turning red? Do you have a fever?” Wei Ying demands. “Lan Zhan, let me check.”

He tries to protest, but her rough fingers are already scrabbling at his brow, trying to feel his forehead through the cold silk of his ribbon, and Lan Wangji nearly passes away on the spot as the ribbon slips down to his nose. Engaged couples are allowed to touch each other’s ribbons, though it isn’t often done, and pushing her away would only hurt her feelings: so Lan Wangji forces himself to endure while she checks his pulse and temperature, taking care not to pull away too quickly after she finishes.

“You are sick,” she gasps, looking down at her empty palm as if she could still feel the heat of Wangji’s skin burning there. “Let’s go to the healers and ask for medicine.”

“No need.”

Wei Ying tugs at his sleeve. “Then what about Shijie? She could set up her own private apothecary here with all the medicine she brought from home. And she apprenticed with our Lufeng doctors, so she’ll definitely know what to give you. Come on!”

Lan Wangji cannot bring himself to refuse; for he can feel the sudden pounding of his pulse and the flush darkening at his throat, and a blissful sense of dizziness that worsens when Wei Ying grasps his hand and haul him out of the library pavilion. He follows without resistance, allowing her to tow him along like a doll dragging behind a child; and when they reach the guest quarters, Wei Ying kicks her sister’s door aside and pulls Wangji over the threshold.

“Shijie!” she cries, startling Jiang-guniang so badly that she rends a long hole in the sampler she was embroidering. “Jie, I know Lan Zhan’s not supposed to be here, but we need some of the medicine Pan-yishi gave you.”

Jiang Yanli blanches and drops her needle.

“You need what?”

“I know it’s expensive, but I’ll pay you back,” frets Wei Ying. “Please, Shijie? For Lan Zhan’s sake?”

For some reason, Jiang-guniang looks more astonished than ever. “You...A-Xian, you need it now? You’re not anticipating it for, ah, later?”

“Right now,” Wei Ying says firmly. “Any delay in treatment could cause trouble, Shijie. Lan Zhan didn’t want to go to the infirmary, you see, so I brought him here.”

“I see,” Jiang Yanli frowns, shooting a stern glare in Lan Wangji’s direction. “Very well, then. I’ll go fetch the herbs and water for tea.”

She stands up and hurries towards the back of the house, shooting Lan Wangji a stern look on her way; and then she disappears, leaving Wangji and Wei Ying alone in the middle of the receiving room.

“Your Shijie is not happy with me,” Lan Wangji murmurs. “You have asked for the herbs on my behalf, and I will not reject your kindness, but it seems the medicine is dearer to Jiang-guniang than I thought. Will you come down with me to Caiyi tomorrow so I can buy quality replacements for her? It must be difficult to part from a needed medicine so far from home.”

“Shijie isn’t angry,” Wei Ying whispers back. “She carries more fever tonic and strengthening pills than she could ever need. Pan-yishi gives her a whole year’s worth at a time, and we’re going back home before autumn.”

A moment later, Jiang Yanli re-enters the room with a pot of hot water and a bag of herbs, which she distills into medicine so quickly that most of the Cloud Recesses’ best healers would have envied her speed. The tea takes less than a a minute to steep, and two minutes to cool; and when Jiang-guniang can put it to her lips without wincing at the heat, she passes it over the table to Wei Ying.

“Here, Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying says tenderly, giving it to Lan Wangji. “Drink.”

“No!” Jiang-guniang cries, snatching the medicine back. “A-Xian, you’re supposed to drink it. What could it possibly do for Second Young Master Lan?”

“But Shijie, that’s not fair! He’s the one who needs it!”

“I know such things are not fair,” Jiang Yanli says, glaring daggers at Lan Wangji; apparently, his worries about the value of the herbs had not been unfounded. “But there is no way to place this responsibility on men, so you must take the medicine. Quickly.”

Wei Ying blinks, puzzled by her sister’s irritation, and reaches out to take her hand. “Jie,” she beseeches, “Shijie, don’t be angry. Lan Zhan wouldn’t have come near me if he’d known that—”

“He is old enough to know,” Jiang-guniang says tartly. “And I’m not happy with you either, Xianxian. I thought Mother was being too strict with you, and that she should trust Lan Wangji to treat you with due respect, but it seems that she was right and I was wrong.”

“Lan Zhan is always respectful towards me.” Wei Ying looks more confused than ever. “If he came to the library knowing he had a fever, it was only because I asked him to accompany me while I copied lines. And he took ill after we got there, anyway, so it’s not his fault!”

“Sister-in-law,” Lan Wangji cuts in. “I apologize for the intrusion. I should not have entered your quarters, or accepted your medicine when you have need of it yourself. Rest assured that I will procure more herbs for you before this afternoon, and seek treatment for my fever elsewhere. Good day.”

He turns around and walks out into the garden, taking slow, measured steps with one hand tucked behind his back. Wei Ying runs after him, urging him to come back and finish the tea Jiang-guniang prepared; but for some reason, Jiang Yanli rushes out after her, looking so embarrassed that her snowy-white cheeks are practically scarlet.

“You wanted medicine for fever?” she gasps, giving Wei Ying a gentle shake. “Just—a simple fever, because Lan-er-gongzi was taken ill in the library?”

“Fevers and sweats, and a shallow pulse,” Wei Ying tells her, counting on her fingers. “You can take his temperature, if you need to. Lan Zhan won’t mind.”

Lan Wangji very much would mind, but providing proof of his fever seems important. He holds out his wrist and lets Jiang Yanli feel it, wondering if she suspected some ailment that could have endangered Wei Ying: perhaps one that harmed women more readily than men, since she had tried to give the medicine to her sister instead. If that is the case, Wangji thinks, Maiden Jiang’s anger is justified; for he would never forgive a man who knowingly made his brother ill, especially if the guilty party was Xiongzhang’s intended.

“I’m a fool,” Jiang Yanli mutters to herself, dropping Lan Wangji’s hand. “But you’re not ill, Lan-er-gongzi. You had a fit of nerves, that’s all.”

“Nerves!”

“Yes, nerves,” Jiang-guniang repeats. “I recommend solitary meditation after training with your sword and hot milk before bed. It worked wonders for A-Cheng when he was a child.”

And with that, she bids them both goodbye, and hastens back into the little guest house before closing the doors behind her.

“I have no idea what just happened,” Wei Ying confesses, “but A-Jie really thought I was in danger. Does Gusu have some kind of mountain fever that spares men and kills women?”

“Not to my knowledge, no.”

“Ah, well. At least we know what’s wrong with you,” his intended says cheerfully. “Let’s go meditate, you dear fuddy-duddy. Shijie told you to start after breakfast, and it’ll be lunchtime in less than a shichen.”

Suddenly, Lan Wangji’s heart feels so full that he can scarcely breathe.

“En, you are right. I will do as you say,” he smiles, taking her hand in his. “Lead the way, Wei Ying.”

[ibijau]

Oh, here's a fun idea for a prompt! In order to teach Wei Wuxian a lesson in eavesdropping, Nie Huaisang makes it seem like he's sleeping with Lan Xichen. What he didn't take into account was an overprotective Lan Wangi.

That wasn’t the plan, Nie Huaisang thought, looking at the blade directed toward his throat. Not at all, not even one little bit.

The plan, as it happened, had been to teach Wei Wuxian a lesson. A few times already, Wei Wuxian had overheard Nie Huaisang talking to someone, usually Jiang Cheng, and completely misunderstood the situation. He’d been mocking them for days about supposedly planning to escape and kiss somewhere, and then later he’d been convinced that Jiang Cheng somehow had a secret crush on Jin Zixuan. So next time he’d noticed Wei Wuxian had his eavesdropping face on while passing near where Jiang Cheng and him were chatting, Nie Huaisang had thought he’d play a little prank.

It had been pretty easy to use just the right intonation when talking about Lan Xichen’s helpful tutoring, how good he was with his hands, but also how Nie Huaisang so often ached after their sessions together. Jiang Cheng had looked at him a little funny of course, but Wei Wuxian had fallen for it hook, line, and sinker. He immediately started teasing Nie Huaisang for that, often within earshot of others.

The plan was that it would reach Lan Qiren’s ears that someone was spreading disgraceful rumours about his eldest nephew, after which he’d naturally punish the culprit. Wei Wuxian would learn a valuable lesson about reaching hasty conclusions without cross checking his sources, and Nie Huaisang could go back to his normal life without being careful about every word he said.

Perfect plan.

Except for the fact that Lan Wangji heard about the rumours long before his uncle did, and appeared to share Wei Wuxian’s lack of critical thinking toward gossip.

“What are your intentions?” Lan Wangji demanded after cornering Nie Huaisang and pressing a very sharp looking sword to his sword.

“My intentions?” Nie Huaisang repeated with a nervous giggle. “About what?”

“Xiongzhang.”

“Ah, I see. Well, Wangji-xiong, listen, the thing is… now, I’m very flattered you’d think I have a chance with your brother. But actually… well, truly, it’s actually Wei Wuxian who…”

That turned out to be the wrong thing to say, because Lan Wangji’s expression instantly turned darker.

“Wei Wuxian as well?” he asked in a low, threatening voice.

“As well? What ‘as well’? There’s no ‘as well’ here!”

“You only toyed with xiongzhang?”

“What? No! It’s Wei Wuxian I was trying to…”

“You toyed with Wei Ying?”

Nie Huaisang, shaking like a leaf, realised two things.

The first was that Lan Wangji was using Wei Wuxian’s personal name, something he never did with anyone, ever.

A very interesting detail to note, if not for his second realisation : Lan Wangji was absolutely going to gut him in just a moment, and he was going to die stupidly like this, and Wei Wuxian would still continue to eavesdrop because really, he wasn’t one for learning lessons anyway.

What a terrible way to die. It was a secondary, no, a tertiary character type of death, when Nie Huaisang had always fully expected to be at leastthe love interest in someone’s life.

It could not end like that.

“Wangji-xiong, you’re misunderstanding completely,” Nie Huaisang claimed. Then, realising that Lan Wangji was probably too angry to listen to the truth, he figured a little lying was probably quite fine. “You see, I was just… I was… I was trying to show Wei Wuxian that there’s no rules in Gusu Lan against liking someone of the same sex!”

Lan Wangji threw him a baffled look, which was an improvement compared to murderous rage.

“Indeed, why would I do that, right?” Nie Huaisang went on. “Well, I… I’ve noticed that you often look at him! And of course I have every reason to think he’s soft on you as well. He speaks about you a lot!”

Too much, really. Nie Huaisang had thought to make it a drinking game, one sip of wine for every time Wei Wuxian talked about Lan Wangji, but he’d given up on the idea after realising he’d probably die of alcohol poisoning within a shichen.

Anyway, hearing this appeared to calm Lan Wangji a bit, who finally lowered his sword, letting Nie Huaisang breathe again without fear of death.

“What about xiongzhang?” he still asked again, but with less anger than before.

“Oh, there’s nothing between your brother and me!” Nie Huaisang quickly defended himself. Too quickly, perhaps. Realising that Lan Wangji might take as much offence at seeing his brother rejected as a romantic prospect as he’d done at the idea of him being romance, Nie Huaisang quickly added: “Not that I would mind if there was. Your brother is a very fine young man. Terribly handsome. Patient and kind and all that. I could only wish I’d be so lucky! But alas, he’ll never see me as anything but a second, vastly inferior to you little brother, I’ve been didi-zoned, and all that stuff. Tragic. Terrible. Anyway, can I go now?”

“We’ll see,” Lan Wangji ominously replied.

“About letting me go?”

“About xiongzhang.”

A nervous laughter tore its way through Nie Huaisang’s throat at that strange statement. Before he could ask for any details, Lan Wangji had turned around and left, doubtlessly intending to check what he’d just learned about Wei Wuxian with the person in question. Nie Huaisang, for his part, figured that this had been a good lesson for himself, and that he should stop trying to teach others anything. He swore to himself he’d never be so foolish again.

At least, not until the next time Wei Wuxian annoyed him, and a new plan needed to be formed.

[aeriis]

Lan Wangji writes

Lan Wangji loved poetry and writing. He's not good at speaking, making his mouth say the words he wants, but he's so good at writing what he wants to. The words are so easily written on paper but so hard to say with his voice. In the end, that's how he dealt with his feelings, too.

There are countless poems and stories written by him about Wei Wuxian. All with the same meaning, all written with the same love. Some are about them, and the reality they live in. Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji, both geniuses, prodigies, until war came and one was known for their righteousness and the other infamous for their unorthodox method. Then, there are the other stories and poems. About a world where they were simple farmers, stylists, commoners. A life where they didn't have to worry about Sect Politics and Cultivations and ghosts and Demonic Cultivation. A world where the one who falls is not a man named Lan Wangji but a more outgoing stranger, someone who could communicate, someone who could have been with Wei Wuxian. These stories vary, until, Wei Wuxian was finally gone, and there was no more Lan Wangji. There was only Wei Wuxian, smiling, happy, alive.

What Lan Wangji would give to have this one story be the one that was reality.

Then, he starts to write letters. Perhaps, once a month, once a year; there are many. All addressed to the same person, but none are sent. He writes about everything and nothing. Lan Wangji writes about A-Yuan, the comb he saw that reminded him of Wei Wuxian, about the stories that Wei Wuxian would have laughed at had he been alive to hear it, about Lotus Pier, about the Yunmeng Jiang Sect, about Lan Wangji's walk in Caiyi, the new night-hunt he had just went on, Lan Wangji's favorite color, what he ate that morning, what he had thought.

Instead of playing inquiry, he chose to write letters; there was no need to disturb Wei Wuxian when he was already in peace with music, asking the most pointless questions he no longer had the right to ask.

In this reality, Wei Wuxian never comes back, but Lan Wangji continues to write anyways. He wishes that, in another reality, Wei Wuxian had been able to achieve the happy ending he deserved.

Years later, Lan Wangji, the renowned Hanguang-jun, dies before living for even half a century. A-Yuan, now Lan Sizhui, finds three slips of paper on his desk when he hears the news of his father's death. It is a letter, a poem, and a story.

A letter for him, telling him of his family, his heritage, his past, of how much his father loved him, of his father before his father, of his Aunt Qing, his Uncle Ning, Granny Popo. Everything; everyone.

A poem that wrote of his journey growing and how it looked in his father's eyes. Of a boy with big round silver eyes hugging his legs, to a crying child hidden into a hollow tree, to when he received his ribbon, his naming ceremony, to when he first received his sword, to his first night-hunt, to the last time they saw each other. It contained a feeling of nostalgia, fondness, and contentment.

A story that tells of two young men, one with gold eyes and another silver, meeting on a rooftop with a jar of wine, continuing until it tells of one falling, another living, and a child that grew into a fine young man; the last living legacy of both.

"I'm proud of you, A-Yuan. And I'm sorry." - Your baba, Lan Wangji

Sizhui didn't know what he was apologizing for, and to his credit, neither did Lan Wangji. Perhaps it was to apologize for not being able to see him fall in love, get married, or form a family. Perhaps it was to apologize for not being able to say such things to him in person. Perhaps it was to apologize for leaving him in Yiling that day, for not doing more to save his family. Perhaps it was to apologize for hiding so much from him.

In the end, it didn't matter, because Sizhui still felt sad. He lost his father, and the only thing left were words on paper, written in his father's calligraphy, and faint descriptions of a time where had more than just a father, an uncle, a granduncle, and Jingyi.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Poor Sizhui. To make it a bit better: He finds Wen Ning and frees him, giving him back his consciousness. Later, when Sizhui dies, Wen Ning dies with him, for the last time.

The idea of Lan Wangji using writing as a way of expressing his emotions makes me smile. Please tell me if anyone has had any ideas similar to this, I very much love this concept.

[sepia-mahogany]

Does Wei Wuxian ever cause trouble tho? I see everywhere in fics or otherwise where he is criticised for so but I don’t think he ever does? He’s playful, yes, he’s lively and friendly, yes, but troublesome? annoying? I don’t think anyone other than Lan Qiren (who doesn’t like anyone breaking even smallest of rules) Jiang Wanyin (jealousy issues ahem) and Yu Ziyuan (again jealously issues) no one really calls Wei Wuxian annoying? (well that and other people like Wen Chao who mind Wei Wuxian thwarting their evil plots lol)

In fact they quite enjoy his company? He’s literally the popular kid among his peers, the one that brings smiles to their faces? 

He’s soft and kind to Wen Ning who was so shy and nervous and encourages him to stand up for himself, and takes his side in front of everyone else? Wen Ning in turn saves his and his martial brothers lives when they’re on the run, and shelters them? 

And based on that kindness of his towards her younger brother (and also because Wen Ning encouraged her and she’s a just person) she risks her entire families lives to save Wei Wuxian and his brother? In turn Wei Wuxian later on saves their family?

Luo Qingyang also known as Mian Mian, Wei Wuxian saves her from her face being burned horribly, who later on stands up for him in front of the cultivational world and leaves her hard earned position because she refuses to be part of condemnation of an innocent man, one who saved her life, and later on the two meet, needless to say things are good between them.

Nie Huaisang and Wei Wuxian are on friendly terms, Wei Wuxian is his friend who doesn’t pressure him to be someone he’s not, instead compliments him and cause mischief together (said mischief being innocent actions of children not something ‘shameful’ that ‘brings bad attention to the sect’ none of that!). Nie Huaisang is one of the people who doesn’t see status while talking to people, enjoy’s the freedom that Wei Wuxian brings and later on brings Wei Wuxian back to life (though also fuelled by his revenge)

Lan Wangji well, 33 whips, committing treason do i need to say more. (that its a whole another essay that’s gonna be written another time) all that needs to be said is Lan Wangji adores him and loves him unconditionally (something Wei Wuxian needs thank you) and Wei Wuxian too, loves him back with all the love, 

The juniors who include Lan Sizhui (Wen Yuan), Lan Jingyi, Jin Ling,and Ouyang Zizhen, all of who deeply care for Wei Wuxian, all of them appreciate Wei Wuxian’s guidance and loved him;

Wen Remnants as a whole are found family for Wei Wuxian, they care for him and he cares for them, like a family, they love each other. Wen Ning, Wen Qing, A-yuan, Granny Wen, Uncle four, all the uncles and aunts love him, and he loves them back.

None of the people who Wei Wuxian is close to and loves and who love him back find him “annoying or troublesome” at all, they enjoy his lively nature, it puts them at ease, they can easily communicate with him and he with them, sooo the notion of anyone being annoyed by him in general isn’t true unless you’re talking about the whole ‘worried because they know Wei Wuxian would put himself into risk for them and may end up hurting himself’ for which they might try to offer him comfort and bandage his wounds, but never scold him because they ARE grateful for him saving them, if he hadn’t they would be heavily injured or dead or worse.

 They love him, if he throws himself in front of a car to save a child, they will be worried for him yes, they will scold him to take care of himself, they will never demean him or tell him ‘you shouldn’t have saved the child’ because they know he was in the right, what should he have done? 

So when I come across any of the fanon writing any of Wei Wuxians loved ones (other than canonically abusive characters like Yu Ziyuan or Wen Chao) being degrading or abusive towards him (even the narrative being like its fine to do so), its so irritating like No! These are people who would fight for Wei Wuxian! Not insult him! They absolutely love him okay.

Why is Wei Wuxian considered to always cause ‘trouble’ when the so called ‘trouble’ is a carefully calculated action that only harms himself (not his family or his sect, just himself)and saves other people (people who are grateful to him) causing ‘trouble’ implies he doesn't care about others, he cares, ‘trouble’ implies he causes others problems, he doesn't, why did this become such a far spread fanon anyway?

[vrishchikawrites]

Could I have a prompt? 🥺🥺 So WWX is taking bath in the Cold Pond to heal from the wounds by the discipline paddle (which I assume he was punished being clothed in his Black robe or in his Gusu Lan disciple robes or Head disciple Jiangs robes whichever fits). Before going to CR, wwx is whipped by mdm yu and LWJ notices wwx’s raw red scars and many scars across his back kinda overlapping and not yet being healed because maybe MDM yu sealed his core or something. LWJ, or with LXC saw WWX’s many crisscrossing scars and realize they’re still raw and kinda risking for infection because when mdm yu unseals his spiritual energy before going to CR, WWX never thought of healing it. Cue LWJ and LXC gets horrified and ask WWX why he had many scars on his back (or other parts of his body can also be included!) no pressure 💕 I love your writing! ❤️❤️

Anyway, it is set during the period in which WWX studies at CR. Lån Qiren, who is obviously not eyeing Wei Wuxian just in case the boy creates some trouble ends up realizing that he is too non chalant about  not eating (because the food there is for rabbits) and WWX is like "Oh, yeah. Nah its fine, I've been worse".

This one has trigger warnings for child abuse, negligence, and issues related to eating habits. Keep that in mind before proceeding. Nothing graphic, but I wanted to warn nonetheless.

I've merged two prompts here.

Please remember that prompts are closed. Also, remember I do not write self-deprication. All prompts that require WWX to have low self-esteem are not going to be written, apologies but the subject is very uncomfortable for me and I don't believe it is canon accurate anyways.

On to the prompt fill.

"That Wei child is entirely too careless." 

Lan Qiren closes his eyes and prays for patience. That boy has been a menace ever since he stepped into Cloud Recesses. Brilliant but wily and mischievous with absolutely no regard for rules. 

"What has he done?" He asks gruffly, reading over the reports from the kitchen staff. Cloud Recesses always monitors the food intake of their guests to make sure everyone is well-fed and no one is consuming more than their due. It wouldn't do for young cultivators to fall ill in their care, after all. 

The primary healer, a matron of some age, had brought the reports instead of the kitchen manager, which was quite unusual, "He forgets meals. Goes without food for days. Survives on small bits of fruit."

Xichen, who has been working on his own reports, raises his head and looks concerned. 

Lan Qiren crosses his arms, feeling a growing sense of ire, "He dislikes our meals." He's not the first one to skip meals because he considers them 'bland' and 'boring'. It's likely the child has been sneaking down to Caiyi town to have more extravagant meals. 

"I checked with our ward team. When he goes days without eating, he doesn't make any trips to Caiyi town either."

Lan Qiren pauses and studies her. Lan Mingyun nods curtly, "When I first noticed this behavior, I immediately put him on my list." Her list of children with food-related issues, he assumes, "His eating habits are very erratic, erratic enough that I wish to assign one of our senior disciples to keep an eye on him."

"You're that worried?" Lan Xichen asks in surprise while Lan Qiren frowns. It isn't unusual to do so but he wonders if it is really necessary.

"As far as I know, the child lived on the streets for quite a few years," She says and Lan Qiren narrows his eyes, inwardly reprimanding himself. He had forgotten about that aspect of Wei Wuxian's history, "The link between early childhood trauma and behavioural problems are well known to us."

Lan Xichen frowns, "I'll ask Wangji to keep an eye on him."

He glances at his nephew sharply, "Why Wangji?" He demands because surely someone else would be better.

"From what I understand, Wei-gongzi will not welcome an assigned senior. He seems to be someone who brushes injuries or illnesses off. He likes Wangji and will be more willing to accept his company."

While the argument is reasonable, Lan Qiren is loath to involve his precious nephew in this. He's already so bothered by the boy. 

But.

He thinks of Wei Wuxian with his sharp eyes and lingering smile and nods. 

---

Wangji listens to Xichen patiently even as his fingers curl into fists under his sleeves. 

He doesn't like Wei Wuxian. The boy is too disruptive, too bold, too distracting-

Too beautiful.

He doesn't like him, but that doesn't mean he's content to ignore his well-being. When Xichen asks him to keep an eye on Wei Ying's eating habits and general behavior, Wangji agrees. 

It will be taxing for him, but he agrees.  

What he doesn't anticipate is… everything that follows. When he starts consciously looking for them, the signs are alarming. Wei Ying doesn't just skip meals whenever he gets too distracted, he picks at the food even when he is eating. While Wangji is comforted to know the boy frequently seeks something richly flavored at Caiyi Town, he doesn't do it often enough to compensate.

There are also some concerning behaviors in the Jiang contingent. Upon closer inspection, it is clear that while Wei Ying does break the rules, the other Jiang Sect disciples are often complicit. Including Jiang Wanyin. 

They not only let their da-shixiong take the blame for all of their actions, but also encourage it. Wei Ying seems disconcertingly accustomed to it. He makes a scene while being punished but seems alright within an hour. 

Jiang Wanyin encourages mischief and reprimands him in turns. 

Wangji doesn't understand this.

"Xiongzhang, I am concerned," Xichen looks up from his tea, his attention immediately on Wangji, unwavering and comforting, "Wei Ying," He takes a moment to form his thoughts, "I am uncertain. I believe he is in an unsafe environment."

Xichen sets his tea aside, "How so?"

"I happened upon a conversation," He grimaces because it is eavesdropping even if his intentions are noble, "Jiang Wanyin and Nie Huaisang requested and encouraged him to get alcohol into Cloud Recesses. When he complained about the punishment, Jiang Wanyin said 'at least, it wasn't Zidian'."

His brother sucks in a sharp breath, "Zidian? Madam Yu? Spiritual weapon? A high-grade weapon typically used against enemies?"

Wangji dips his head. 

"I'll ask uncle to stop assigning corporal punishments." Lan Xichen says, "They won't have the desired effect in any case and we don't want to damage him permanently. Tomorrow, ask him to practice Cultivation in the Cold Pond as punishment."

Wangji nods, "I'll assign Jiang Wanyin and Nie Huaisang proper punishment as well."

"Wait until we have a better grasp on the situation." Xichen says solemnly, "If we act too quickly, things will escalate and may cause more harm to Wei-gongzi."

Wangji is reluctant because his sense of justice is not satisfied. He remembers how the Jiang disciples encouraged Wei Ying to accept punishment on their behalf. And then to know Jiang Wanyin was also complicit…

"We must approach this cautiously, Wangji."

He nods.

---

Red, irritated, scarred.

Wangji swallows as he sees the state of Wei Ying's back as the Jiang disciple steps into the Cold Pond. There are so many whip scars on his back, so many that have barely begun to heal, that he feels nauseous. 

"Wei Ying," He struggles to keep his tone neutral, "Your back." He cannot imagine the agony that Wei Ying would've suffered when he took more punishment on it the other day. 

Wei Ying glances at him and grins, "Aiya, Lan Zhan, is that concern I see on your pretty face?" He asks, spinning around eagerly, "Concern for little old me?"

His back is out of sight and the way Wei Wuxian is leaning towards him is meant to distract and fluster.

Wangji… suddenly understands. Wei Ying is naturally playful and mischievous, but he uses his personality for disguise and manipulation as well. Not maliciously, but in a way that harms him.

"Wei Ying," Wangji refuses to be moved. There is a significant shift in his mind. He no longer feels annoyed by the person before him. If anything, he feels furious. 

He feels protective.

"Wei Ying, your back."

The Jiang disciple shrugs, "Punishment, you know how it is." 

"For what?" He demands, catching Wei Ying's elbow and turning him around. The willingness to touch him stuns Wei Ying momentarily, enough for Wangji to get a good look at the brutal devastation written on Wei Ying's back. 

Wei Ying clears his throat and shrugs, "It's more of a preemptive punishment? Madam Yu knew I would cause trouble here, of course." He chuckles.

"Preemptive punishment?" He asks softly, the very notion troubling him. 

Wei Ying shrugs again but doesn't attempt to explain when it is clear Wangji isn't willing to indulge him.

"Wei Ying,"

"Lan Zhan," Wei Ying starts to move towards the shore, "Don't worry about things that don't concern you. Your head will forever be burdened if you do."

Wangji feels something in him recoil at such a blunt dismissal. 

"Doesn't concern me? How can it not concern me?" He wants to ask but is unable to. 

Wei Ying has made him very uncomfortable with his forward personality and near constant teasing, but Wangji has seen the genuine offer of friendship underneath it all. 

He has always spurned it. 

As Wei Ying climbs onto the shore, his wounds red against his naturally pale skin, Wangji makes a decision, "Would you not feel concerned if it were me?" He asks but he already knows the answer.

He already knows this man enough.

"Of course," Wei Ying says and shrugs on his robes, hiding a wince but unable to help his body's reaction to pain, "But you and I are different." He glances over his shoulder at Wangji, "I consider you my friend," He says, "But you don't consider me yours."

His breath stills at the acceptance in Wei Ying's tone.

"And that's alright." The Jiang disciple waves and walks away, "Don't worry too much, Lan Zhan. This one isn't weak. The wounds will heal within a few days."

---

"The facts are these - Wei-gongzi is punished preemptively with Zidian, often enough that there are deep scars on his back," Lan Xichen explains, "I assume it is his Golden Core keeping him from sustaining permanent damage."

Lan Qiren is still bristling at the very thought of preemptive punishment. What a ridiculous notion! Of course, the child doesn't care about rules and upsetting people! He has already been punished enough to excuse everything but outright treason.  

How is such a method effective? How does it correct a child's misbehavior? 

"The Jiang Sect disciples are accustomed to their da-shixiong being punished in their stead. They actively encourage it. Jiang Wanyin has asked Wei-gongzi to sneak in alcohol. And he refused to come forward when Wei-gongzi was punished." Xichen takes a deep breath, "I believe any lingering issues he may have because of his early days as a street orphan-"

"Are ignored," Lan Qiren concludes grimly, "It is no wonder the child has such strong cultivation. He is facing strife constantly."

"Is there a way to rescue him?" Wangji asks after being grimly silent for the entire meeting, "Get him away from the Jiang Sect?"

Lan Qiren eyes him, "Wangji, the situation is complicated. He's still the Jiang Head Disciple and sects don't just part with their high ranking disciples."

Xichen smiles sympathetically, "We'll find a way to pressure Jiang-zongzhu into taking action. He'll lose face if the other Sects know how his lady is treating their Head Disciple." He shakes his head at Wangji's expression, "Let us think about it. Meanwhile, you just need to be there for your friend, Wangji."

Lan Qiren arches a brow, "Friend? Wangji, I thought you disliked the boy."

Wangji purses his lips, a stubborn light entering his eyes, "Wei Ying is my friend." He insists, resolve lining his every word. 

He looks at Xichen, who just looked amused, "According to Wei-gongzi, he considers Wangji a friend and will be very concerned if Wangji was in a similar situation," He huffs, "But Wangji doesn't consider Wei-gongzi his friend, so there's no need for Wangji to worry."

Lan Qiren closes his eyes and rubs his forehead in an uncharacteristic display of frustration, "That boy is a singular menace."

---

Wangji pursues friendship with all the dedication in his being. He learns to cook savory dishes and gives them to Wei Ying every day. Wei Ying, unable and utterly unwilling to deny, eats it all. 

He glares the Jiang disciples into submission whenever they attempt to draw Wei Ying into mischief. The Jiang Head Disciple is fully exempt from corporal punishment. Instead, he spends hours in the library either copying rules, rewriting classics, or transcribing Buddhist texts. 

All of these activities prove to be much more effective punishments.

Meanwhile, Lan Qiren attends a Discussion Conference and has word with Jiang Fengmian. 

The response is a gentle order from the Jiang-zongzhu for Wei Ying. He asks his disciple to remain in Cloud Recesses for Musical Cultivation training. He also mentions it is time for Jiang Wanyin to take up Head Disciple responsibilities and learn true leadership. 

Wei Ying eyes the smiling Lan Xichen and impassive Lan Qiren sharply but doesn't say anything.

In two years time, the distance between Wei Ying and the Jiang Sect grows. The distance between Wei Ying and Lan Zhan ceases to exist. 

Just like that, Wei Wuxian's destiny changes.

[robininthelabyrinth]

Sufficiently strong emotionally-charged moments of physical contact can occasionally forge long-term telepathic bonds between cultivators. These bonds are usually based on positive emotions like familial or romantic love, or deep feelings of friendship, but the emotions don’t necessarily have to be positive to forge a bond. Wei Wuxian is very upset to find out that punching Jin Zixuan in the face apparently counts as a sufficiently strong emotionally-charged moment of physical contact.

on ao3

Wei Wuxian had been obsessed with the idea of a resonant bond ever since he first learned about it.

Sure, it was a rarity. It was easier for a cultivator to find a friend, a lover, or even a soulmate than it was for them to create a resonant bond, which required not merely liking or understanding or even love but rather a single moment in time in which two cultivators were on exactly the same wavelength.

Their cultivation strength, their frame of mind, the state of their bodies, the exact way in which they touched – in that one moment, everything would be exactly the same, and the Heavens would forget for that brief moment to see the two as separate, like two separate raindrops merging into one before the moment passed, some difference introduced, and they were broken apart into separate beings again. Yet even after they separated, they would irrevocably retain some aspects of the other, a connection that generally manifested, it was said, as a mental bond that could not be broken, a tie that would keep them bound together no matter the distance.

Such a thing could not be worked towards, only hoped for; it was a matter of luck.

Wei Wuxian had never wanted anything more in his life.

The thought of never being alone again – it enticed him, it excited him. Jiang Cheng could wrinkle his nose in distaste at the idea that he might not be alone in his mind anymore, that someone would see all the stupid or terrible things he sometimes thought, but to Wei Wuxian that was the best part: that someone would see you and know you and you would see and know them, too. To have someone to accompany you through the best and worst moments of your life, always at your side…

To never fear abandonment, to never need to worry about someone going out only for a little and then never coming back.

It would be amazing.

That was what Wei Wuxian thought.

Well, that was what he thought right up until he punched Jin Zixuan in the face for insulting his shijie, his whole heart burning at the unfairness of adults who didn’t understand, at other boys who didn’t appreciate what they had, at everything all around them and at his own weakness in not being able to do more, and something just –

Clicked.

-

“Hey, wake up! Wake up! Are you all right?”

Wei Wuxian opened his eyes, only to be assaulted with what felt like double vision. Above him were Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang, hovering and looking anxious, and from the corner of his eye he could see Lan Wangji, who he so enjoyed teasing, was sweeping over to them with a grim expression – and yet at the same time he thought he could perceive different faces above him as well.

Three young men and two women, all looking down at him with smiles like sharks, ready to devour. Each one of them draped in the gold they lusted to take from his hands –

What the fuck? Wei Wuxian thought groggily. How did I end up on the ground?

Good question. I didn’t think I got punched that hard.

Wait, Wei Wuxian thought. Hold up, I got punched? I didn’t even see the peacock lift his fists!

…Wei Wuxian? Is that – you?

Wei Wuxian’s eyes went wide when he realized he hadn’t said any of that out loud, that to judge from Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang’s chatter they hadn’t heard either him nor the other voice. Which meant that the voice had to be...in his head. Is this – this is a resonant bond. We formed a resonant bond!

Shit, Jin Zixuan thought, because it was Jin Zixuan, wasn’t it? Shit, shit, shit. Please don’t say anything about this to anyone!

What? Why?

Please!

Wei Wuxian hadn’t even known that the peacock knew that word.

Fine, he said, feeling generous on account of the whole bond business. I won’t tell. For now.

“Wei-xiong?” Nie Huaisang asked, looking worriedly fretful. “Are you all right? You haven’t said anything.”

“I’m fine,” he said, rubbing his head and trying to think of a lie to explain why he fell over like that. “I think the peacock must’ve had a talisman or a defensive weapon or something. Whatever it is, I’m fine now.”

“Good. I’m glad you’re all right,” Jiang Cheng said, looking deeply relieved. And then, a moment later – “Because I’m going to kill you - !”

There wasn’t too much time to talk after that. Wei Wuxian was sentenced to kneeling, and then his Uncle Jiang arrived and Sect Leader Jin arrived – oh no, oh no, oh no, I fucked up, Jin Zixuan thought hopelessly, and Wei Wuxian couldn’t help but feel a bit of the same – and the next thing Wei Wuxian knew, the engagement between Jin Zixuan and Jiang Yanli was broken and he was being sent to pack up his things, to be taken home at once.

Jin Zixuan was swept away by his father, too.

“A pity about the engagement,” Sect Leader Jin remarked idly as they walked together. “Perhaps you shouldn’t have said such a thing. Your mother will be disappointed.”

Wei Wuxian could feel the way that that jabbed at Jin Zixuan’s heart like a stab with a sword.

“Still, it’s no harm,” the man continued, indifferently ignoring the impact his words had had on his son. “One could even call it a gain! You won’t be burdened down with that shrew’s daughter anymore.”

That what?!

Tune out of this conversation, please, Jin Zixuan said, his thoughts dull and sluggish and resigned. It’s going to get worse from here on out.

It did.

Sect Leader Jin commented at some great length about his views on Madame Yu’s many faults – her temper, her strength, her nosiness, her thought that she was worth anything other than a pair of legs and an inheritance – and contrasted it with some salacious comments on her positive traits – mostly the legs, with a few comments on the upper half as well – and then he started speculating about Jiang Yanli, too, in a way that made Wei Wuxian’s blood boil.

It’s not about her, Jin Zixuan told him, his voice a little desperate in a familiar way – he was used to having to defend his father, and just as obviously didn’t want to. He’s building up a defense.

What?

For my mother. She’ll be angry at him for agreeing to break the engagement, so he’ll say that it was my idea, say all this stuff, and then she’ll be angry at me for believing it, instead, even though I don’t. This isn’t what I wanted at all.

Wei Wuxian frowned. You wanted to marry my shijie? You sure didn’t show it!

No, I just didn’t want to marry anybody, Jin Zixuan said, and…okay, fine, that was a pretty respectable position. Wei Wuxian didn’t particularly want to marry anyone yet, either. I just got angry when everyone was talking about how it was a done deal, that’s all. Just one more thing that got picked for me.

Wei Wuxian had heard Jiang Cheng complain about similar enough things – how much of his life was selected in advance, how much was organized for the benefit of his sect rather than his own interests, how little choice he got. How even if he’d been as good as Wei Wuxian, or even better, he still wouldn’t have been able to go out and hunt pheasants all day the way Wei Wuxian did.

He refused to feel sympathy. Well, you shouldn’t have taken it out on my shijie!

Probably not. Jin Zixuan was silent for a moment. It probably doesn’t help, but I’m sorry for my rudeness.

Wei Wuxian hated it when people were reasonable. It made it so much harder to stay angry at them.

Are you going to tell me why I can’t tell people about this bond yet? he asked. You’d better have a good reason, I had to put up with an entire scolding from Jiang Cheng because I didn’t have a good excuse!

Later tonight. I promise.

That night, Wei Wuxian excused himself early and hid himself in his room on the boat. He knew that he was giving both Uncle Jiang and Jiang Cheng the impression that he was feeling deeply guilty about having broken the engagement, thereby making them feel bad about it, which he didn’t intend, but he really wanted to hear the reason. If it wasn’t good enough, he’d really break Jin Zixuan’s nose this time!

It really is a good reason!

Well, then? If it’s so good, don’t keep me in suspense!

Jin Zixuan sighed. Wei Wuxian felt it like an exhalation on his cheek, as if Jin Zixuan were right there beside him. You know how a resonant bond is supposed to be equal?

What do you mean ‘supposed to be’? Wei Wuxian asked, and felt something cold in his belly.

There are forbidden techniques, ancient ones, that are designed to manipulate a resonant bond into an unequal state. To make one side the master and the other the slave.

That’s disgusting!

If we told anyone, my father would find a way to get one, Jin Zixuan said, and he wasn’t guessing. His voice was utterly certain. There’s very little money can’t buy, and he wouldn’t be able to resist the idea of having a spy in the very heart of the Jiang clan.

Well, then just don’t tell him!

Just like I didn’t tell him about what I said about your shijie?

Wei Wuxian got tripped up by that. It was true, Jin Zixuan hadn’t said a word about what had happened, and yet his father had already known every last detail. How..?

One of my ‘friends’ told him, of course. Probably more than one, actually – I wouldn’t be surprised if they all passed it along. It’s what he pays them for.

He pays for your friends to spy on you?!

I already told you that there’s little money can’t buy. Why not friends?

I wouldn’t be friends with people who accepted money to spy on me. Why do you?

If it’s not this set, it’ll be another, and it’s all the same. If they won’t be bought, then I can’t be friends with them…anyway, I’ve gotten used to these ones.

All of them? Wei Wuxian asked. Even Mianmian? She didn’t seem the type…

Her name is Luo Qingyang, and yes. Her parents are sick and my father’s paying for the treatment; if she doesn’t tell him everything, he’ll cut off funds…she told me about it, though. Said that if there was ever a time that I wanted her to ‘forget’ to report something, she could do that. That’s more than most would do, and probably about as much as anyone can expect –

Have you ever had a friend that wasn’t bought? Wei Wuxian asked. I mean…ever?

Jin Zixuan was silent.

Well, that wouldn’t do.

Well, I guess you have me now, Wei Wuxian thought, with only a tiny amount of self-pity for the stupidity of agreeing to be friends with Jin Zixuan. Still, if he’d survived his efforts at being Lan Wangji’s friend, he could survive anything. No one’s going to buy me!

But –

Nope! No take-backs! We have a resonant bond, peacock. You think I’m going to waste a gift from the Heavens like this just because it’s with you? You’ve got another thing coming!

…can you at least stop calling me a peacock?!

-

Madame Yu made her displeasure clear enough when Wei Wuxian returned, ordering him to kneel all night and do every available chore and things like that, but Wei Wuxian didn’t take it to heart – he never did, really.

Like Jiang Cheng, Madame Yu’s bark was worse than her bite: for all that she hissed and spat and punished him with kneeling or holding up weights, she’d never denied him resources, kept him back from training, or even denied him the spot of head disciple to promote another less qualified in his place, which she very well might have if she were a bit pettier.

So he didn’t take it personally, even if Jin Zixuan seemed indignant on his behalf – you were defending her daughter! You’d think she’d give you some leeway for that, at least! – and at any rate it was better than Jin Zixuan’s slow meandering way home, with his father disappearing every night into a brothel or the bedroom of some innkeeper’s daughter or something like that.

It was better than Jin Zixuan’s mother’s reaction, too, which was to scream and shout and say vicious nasty things, to smash plates and vases against the walls right over his head, and then to pull him into her arms and make him promise over and over again that he would never betray her.

I think I suffered more in terms of physical exertion, but you get full points for all the emotional devastation, Wei Wuxian said after Jin Zixuan returned to hide in his bedroom. Does she do that a lot?

All the time, Jin Zixuan said. All the fucking time.

After a moment, he added, guiltily, It’s only that she loves me –

Ugh, don’t even start with that, Wei Wuxian said. Complaining about awful parent-related trauma is boring, I get enough of it from Jiang Cheng. Help me figure out what I should do tomorrow: flying kites, swimming, or hunting pheasants? Oh, or fishing!

…seriously? Do you spend any time cultivating?

Oh, come on. It’s my first day back!

That just means you have more you need to catch up on!

-

Your shijie is really nice.

I told you!

You didn’t! You just hit me!

-

Wei Wuxian loved having a resonant bond.

Sure, it wasn’t with someone useful like Jiang Cheng or even wonderful like Lan Wangji – I can hear you, you know – but it was kind of nice to have someone to complain to when it would be awkward to put it onto Jiang Cheng or Jiang Yanli.

The other half being Jin Zixuan was also not as bad as he had first thought it would be. Sure, he was just as spoiled, arrogant, vain, and deeply cynical about human nature as Wei Wuxian had thought – I can still hear you! – but he was also an awkward introvert with no social skills and an over-active guilt complex – fuck you too, Wei Wuxian – and, in the sum total of things, surprisingly tolerable. Thanks? I think?

It’d certainly made the indoctrination camp more tolerable, even if it did mean having two people talking in his ear about how he needed to think more about the consequences of his actions and how it might reflect on his sect, and certainly having Jin Zixuan confirming that the other disciples had made it out of the cave and were moving at full speed to try to get help made the days he was waiting with Lan Wangji a lot less stressful, and their ensuing rescue a lot easier.

But sometimes –

This is a terrible idea! You can’t do it!

You don’t get a say! Wei Wuxian snarled. This is my decision.

Fuck you, Jin Zixuan said. A moment later, quieter: Is this because I couldn’t make it to you in time to help?

Wei Wuxian swallowed, feeling his eyes burn. The Wen attack was a surprise to everyone, he said. Even if you were able to convince your father to let you go help with everyone you had, it wouldn’t – you wouldn’t have made it in time to do anything.

After his father had refused, Jin Zixuan had snuck out of Jinlin Tower through what he’d thought was a secret passage and tried to go anyway, only to be caught and dragged back. Wei Wuxian appreciated the effort, even if it didn’t make a difference in the end.

When they were on the run from the Wen sect, after, Jin Zixuan had encouraged Wei Wuxian to head to Lanling, swearing that he wouldn’t allow anyone to turn them over to the Wen sect, but they hadn’t gotten that far.

And now…

It’s my choice, Wei Wuxian said. You don’t get a say.

Fuck you, Jin Zixuan said again, but his voice was softer. Fine. But I’m here for you.

Wei Wuxian smiled, just a little bit, and told to Wen Qing to start.

-

I’m going to murder my father, Jin Zixuan said, conversationally. And then go to the hell reserved for patricides and be reborn as a chicken right before slaughter.

For shame, Wei Wuxian said. Not even a lamb or a goat?

No, I want to be able to bite someone and mean it, and chickens are better at that than goats.

Wei Wuxian giggled, a little hysterically. It’s fine, he said, looking around the Burial Mounds. It’s fine that he won’t let you come to my rescue immediately. Not like I’m going anywhere.

He’d thought – they’d both thought – that the resonant bond would break or maybe transfer to Jiang Cheng along with Wei Wuxian’s golden core, but it hadn’t.

Wei Wuxian had been depressingly grateful for it, for the by now familiar Lanling cadence of Jin Zixuan in his head. It made the horrible quiet empty of the Burial Mounds a little more tolerable, a little less awful.

Anyway, he said briskly, shaking off his terror at being here alone but for the voice in his head. I have an idea…

-

I feel like if I knew Chifeng-zun looked like that I would’ve made befriending Nie Huaisang more of a priority when I was younger.

I know, right? Wei Wuxian thought back. Just…wow.

A moment later, he added, a little irritably, I thought you were into my shijie again?

I am! I’m allowed to have eyes, okay?

Not if you’re surnamed Jin you aren’t.

Fuck you.

Nope. And Chifeng-zun isn’t going to, either.

He could feel Jin Zixuan rolling his eyes. I don’t even want him to, I was really just looking. Anyway, how’s Lan Wangji doing?

Lan Zhan? He’s – well, he’s always bothering me about going back to Gusu with him, talking about how my demonic cultivation is dangerous to me, but oh, you should have seen him when he joins us to fight..! You can forgive anything, really, just to watch him move – Wei Wuxian paused. Wait, why are you asking?

No reason.

Jin Zixuan! You tell me this instant -

-

Jin Zixuan was locking Wei Wuxian out of his head again.

It was a technique they’d worked on developing together – with some assistance from Wei Wuxian’s brilliance and Jin Zixuan’s ability to find and purchase extremely rare reference texts, whether on resonant bonds or just more generally, including when Wei Wuxian had needed some help figuring out some things about demonic cultivation while trapped on the Burial Mounds – as it had become moderately urgent following Jin Zixuan’s first spring dream involving Jiang Yanli, and even more so once he’d decided that he really did want to marry her, actually, if she’d be willing to have him.

There were some things Wei Wuxian did not need to know about his shijie.

Still, it was unusual for him to block him during the day. One might even call it suspicious.

I’m sorry, Jin Zixuan said abruptly. It had to be done, and you weren’t going to do it.

Huh? What are you talking about…?

“Wei Wuxian!” Jiang Cheng shouted, and Wei Wuxian turned, surprised. His shidi’s eyes were red as if he’d been crying, and he ran up and pulled him into his arms. “Wei Wuxian…!”

“What?” he asked, puzzled. “What’s this about…?”

“How could you?!” Jiang Cheng demanded, weeping into his neck. “You should have told me – you had no right to – to give me – Wei Wuxian!”

Wei Wuxian’s back went stiff. You didn’t!

It was the truth or you getting kicked out of your sect! He needed to know!

Fuck you! It wasn’t your choice to make!

I’m not going to stand by and let you get schemed against, Jin Zixuan said. Certainly not by my own father. I won’t!

I’m going to make you pay for this, Wei Wuxian said darkly, then looked down at Jiang Cheng in his arms. And possibly thank you for it. But I’m definitely going to make you pay!

-

This may sound weird, Jin Zixuan said. But I think I’m being poisoned.

Based on what I know about Lanling Jin sect and its politics, it’s not weird at all, Wei Wuxian said instinctively, then frowned. Are you serious? It’s not just baby fatigue or something?

That’s what I thought at first, too. But now I’m not so sure. He was silent for a moment. I don’t want to sound like my mother, but…

You think it’s Lianfeng-zun? I’m not saying he doesn’t have the most motive for it, but do you really think..? He seems so nice.

He is, most of the time. Jin Zixuan sighed. Maybe I really am just tired.

Wei Wuxian didn’t think so. He’d had a half-dozen years of listening to the backstabbing, vicious world of Jinlin Tower under his belt by now – had fought bitterly in the war only to fight even more bitterly for something like the right to attend his own shijie’s wedding, something that ought to have been his by right – had nearly suffered an ambush when he tried to attend Jin Ling’s first month party, with Jin Zixun attacking him and Wen Ning going unexpectedly crazy and Jin Zixuan rushing over as fast as he could to make them all stop. If he hadn’t already known about Jin Zixuan not knowing about this, if he hadn’t felt something go wrong and thrown himself in between them without thinking, Jin Zixuan might’ve died there and then on the Qiongqi path.

If Jin Zixuan thought he was being poisoned, he was probably being poisoned.

I’ll come visit you and look into it, Wei Wuxian said. We can pretend that I’m there to visit shijie.

They’d long ago confessed the truth to Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli, of course. For some reason, neither had looked all that surprised.

With your reputation, even if you figured something out, who’d believe you? Jin Zixuan asked. Ask Hanguang-jun if he’ll come, his reputation will bear up.

Lan Zhan? Sure! I’m always happy to work with him. But you know, he’s been ignoring me recently…I don’t know why…

Tell him about the resonant bond.

What? I thought we were still keeping it a secret.

Tell him. He doesn’t tell anyone anything.

Good point, I guess. You think that’ll help him stop ignoring me?

Yes.

Wei Wuxian generally trusted Jin Zixuan’s reading of people, now that he was mature enough not to let his personal feelings cloud his judgment. All right, I will. Can you tell me why?

You’ll find out when you tell him.

Unhelpful.

Noted and ignored.

Fuck you.

Yeah, you too. See you soon.

-

Jin Zixuan?

Yeah?

Thank you for my love life, but also, FUCK YOU.

[goodlucktai]

out past the shallow breakers

the untamed pairing: jiang cheng & wei ying, jiang cheng & lan sizhui word count: 3148 read on ao3

x

“He died!”

The words ring loud, sharp—in the pavilion where they’re taking their evening meal, surrounded on all sides by untroubled water, the words seem to carry for miles.

It’s unlike Lan Sizhui to raise his voice at all, much less to raise it toward a senior. His hands, resting politely on his knees under the table, have curled into fists.

“Everyone goes on and on as though baba has so much to atone for,” Lan Sizhui says, each word lurching from his throat like a line of fierce corpses shambling through brush. “What more is there for him to give? What more do you want? He died.”

Jin Ling is staring at his friend as though he’s never seen him fully before. On Lan Sizhui’s other side, Wei Wuxian’s expression is shifting rapidly from alarm to comprehension. His gray eyes are full of a painful understanding.

“Sizhui ah,” Wei Wuxian says, touching the boy’s shoulder. “Come take a walk with me.”

Jerking his head in a nod, Lan Sizhui pushes to his feet and then pauses there. His Gusu Lan whites, those extra lines and layers that denote him a member of the main family, ghost elegantly around him when he lowers himself in a bow that is every inch deep that it needs to be and not one inch deeper.

“Sect Leader Jiang, this disciple apologizes,” he says. The cheerful ‘shushu’ of earlier that morning might as well be a memory of another life. “My behavior was unworthy.”

He doesn’t grit it out, the way Jin Ling would probably have had to. It doesn’t even seem to cost him any pride.

For one, single, impossible moment, it’s as though Jiang Yanli is standing there, making her apologies to their mother for her brothers’ sake, to spare them any pain she could. It didn’t matter that the blame wasn’t hers. It didn’t cost her any pride, either.

But Jiang Yanli didn’t have a chance to be a part of her nephew’s life, as much as she would have wanted to be. This likeness isn’t hers, not truly. Wei Wuxian was always more like his sister than he or Jiang Cheng were ready to admit.

“Forget it,” Jiang Cheng says. His voice is hoarse, but in the stillness of the water and the silence of the pavilion, it carries, too. “Go on.”

Wei Wuxian shepherds his son from the table. He glances back at Jiang Cheng once, a grimace of apology on his face, but then Lan Sizhui’s hand finds the trailing black hem of Wei Wuxian’s sleeve and clutches to it, and that steals all of Wei Wuxian’s attention as easily as a slap or a shout might have.

The moment they’re gone, Jin Ling lets out a breath he must have been holding, and rounds on his other uncle with wide eyes.

“What did you say?” Jin Ling blurts. “I wasn’t really paying attention, but it didn’t sound like—I mean, it sounded normal.”

Jiang Cheng is still staring at the place Lan Sizhui had stood.

The last living remnant of a persecuted clan, so much an amalgamation of his two fathers that it didn’t make sense that one of them had been dead for most of his young life—holding a grudge and bowing his head at the same time. Lan Wangji, in Jiang Cheng’s experience, has never once let something go that he could nurse icy resentment for instead. Wei Wuxian has always choked down hurt like it was second nature, no matter that it must feel like swallowing nails every time.

It was a normal conversation, but perhaps that’s exactly why Lan Sizhui couldn’t bear another second of it.

“He died,” Lan Sizhui had said, as raw as a fresh wound, or one that kept getting torn open again before it could heal. “What more do you want?”  

#

“Ah, Jiang Cheng,” Wei Wuxian says the next morning, meeting him in the courtyard. “Did you sleep well?”

He’s smiling with a certain nervous energy that Jiang Cheng can only pick out because he spent the formative years of his life raising and being raised by his siblings. To an outsider, there probably wouldn’t be a single visible chink in that cheerful armor.

Jiang Cheng, for all his failings, isn’t an outsider. Not quite. The door between them is closed—has been closed for years, almost decades—but Wei Wuxian isn’t the one who closed it. There almost certainly isn’t a lock or talisman keeping Jiang Cheng from forcing it open again.

It won’t come open again easily. There is so much stacked in the way. Hurt and betrayal and grief throw their weight into keeping it shut, weighing it down on either side.

But—

“What more do you want?” Lan Sizhui had asked.

“Fine,” Jiang Cheng forces out. Wei Wuxian blinks, as if he didn’t expect a forthright answer, or any answer at all. Something about his open surprise at the barest scrap of civility makes Jiang Cheng add, “If you’re awake this early, you didn’t sleep at all.”

His brother takes the opening for what it is, and bends into character. “Oh! You know me so well!”

Mo Xuanyu’s body is smaller, slighter, than the body that Wei Wuxian was born into, and his face is not quite the same, but Wei Wuxian’s mannerisms shine through so clearly that it’s easy to look past everything else. Even the way he stands still is entirely his own, his whole body vibrating with the necessary focus it takes to keep from bursting into movement again.

He is so familiar. The most familiar thing in Jiang Cheng’s entire, almost-empty life.

“I’m sorry about last night,” Wei Wuxian says. The words spill from his mouth like river pebbles, scattering around their feet. There’s that echo of their jiejie again, smiling around I’m sorry. “Don’t hold it against him, please. He’s so young, and he’s struggling to make sense of some things. He was happy that you invited him to Lotus Pier.”

The past-tense makes Jiang Cheng want to flinch, but he doesn’t. He just stands there in the peach pink morning and absorbs the beginning of a goodbye.

“So you’re leaving, then?” he mutters.

“I think we’ve definitely worn out our welcome this time,” Wei Wuxian says, easily shouldering the blame for everyone else’s bad behavior. They might as well be twelve years old again, kneeling here in the courtyard under Madam Yu’s furious eyes. “But it’s alright! Wen Ning sent word that he’s waiting for us outside of Yunmeng and Sizhui is eager to see him. We’ll go find some trouble to get into before we head back home.”

He won’t say a word about this change of plans to his husband, but Lan Wangji will still find out—whether Lan Sizhui tells him, or Wen Ning, or he just picks up something from Wei Wuxian through osmosis—and the next cultivator conference will be excruciating. And if the Jiang clan gets anything out of it, it won’t be anything good. And Jiang Cheng will feel slighted and angry for months, until the next time Wei Wuxian swings by for a visit. And having his brother nearby will soothe an ache in the pit of Jiang Cheng’s chest that he’s able to ignore all the rest of the time. And then, inevitably, Wei Wuxian will look wistfully at the water, or linger for too long by the flowers their sister liked best, or bring some other manner of ghost to the dinner table, and Jiang Cheng will lash out because it’s the only way he knows how to handle hurt. And then Wei Wuxian will extract himself and go home to Cloud Recesses early, and Lan Wangji will rightly guess why. And it just never fucking ends, does it?

The grief he carries around with him—he’s not wrong to carry it. It’s his. He was hurt, time and again, by a person he used to count on not to hurt him. He’s two times an orphan; once when his parents died, and again when his siblings did. He had to rebuild his home from the ground up, by himself, with his own two hands. Everything he has is what he was able to dig out of the dirt and ashes.

It isn’t Wei Wuxian’s fault that Lotus Pier fell. It isn’t his fault that the Wens were persecuted, that they had nowhere else to turn for protection. And it isn’t—

This one hurts; this one comes away bleeding. Jiang Cheng forces himself through it anyway.

It isn’t Wei Wuxian’s fault that Yanli died.

She died for him, but he didn’t ask her to.

Jiang Cheng feels his brother’s golden core thrumming inside his chest, hyper-aware of it now in a way he rarely was before—how it feels the way the sun looks in the morning, warm and brilliant and spilling color across the dull gray of dawn.

He didn’t ask Wei Wuxian to cut himself open for Jiang Cheng’s sake. He can’t be blamed for his brother’s choices. And if that’s true (and it has to be true or Jiang Cheng will go insane) then Wei Wuxian can’t be blamed for their sister’s choice, either. Yanli died for Wei Wuxian because she loved him, and Wei Wuxian gave Jiang Cheng his golden core because he loved him, and Jiang Cheng never moved on and never let go because he loved them, too.

They weren’t raised to love softly or quietly. Love between the three of them was always fierce, like a wild animal baring its teeth. Clinging to each other in a world that wanted to rip them apart. Even Yanli, who smiled and spoke with such sweetness, went to war because her brothers were there.

“What more do you want?” Lan Sizhui had asked.

Jiang Cheng lifts his head. Wei Wuxian is already looking at him, poised, as ever, to leave the moment Jiang Cheng gives him any indication that he should, like a bird ready to fling itself into flight. His brother, dead for thirteen years and back again, and only sometimes-welcome in the place he used to call home. Only sometimes-wanted by the person who used to be his family.

In a world full of people missing people they’ll never see again, Wei Wuxian is a miracle that Jiang Cheng is entirely unworthy of.

He’s right to carry his grief, because it’s his. But he wouldn’t be wrong—it wouldn’t be a betrayal—if he chose to set it down.

“You find trouble as easy as breathing,” he says, speaking through his heart, where it’s lodged in his throat, “so that shouldn’t be too hard.”

“Maligned!” Wei Wuxian cries with an air of great sorrow. “Blatantly maligned, by my own flesh and blood!”

Jiang Cheng can’t say what he wants to say. He can’t find the words. There’s only so much of himself he can dig up and expose like raw nerves before the pain of it becomes overwhelming, and he reacts to the hurt the way he always does, and shoves Wei Wuxian away.

“Don’t forget to say goodbye to Jin Ling, or he’ll never forgive you,” Jiang Cheng settles for. “And I’ll be the one stuck hearing about it.”

“I would never forget my favorite nephew,” Wei Wuxian says easily.

“And if you fuck up, and get yourself into a stupid mess,” Jiang Cheng adds, before he loses his nerve, “don’t let me hear about it from someone else.”

For a moment, Wei Wuxian doesn’t seem to know what to say.

“What if it’s very stupid?” he finally asks, his voice at once both faint and painfully fond.

“What else is new?” Jiang Cheng snaps. “Just send for me, and I’ll come.”

Above them, the pink and orange of fresh dawn make way for vivid blue. As Jiang Cheng stands in his childhood home with his only brother, while the market comes to life outside the walls and the breeze sweeps the smell of lotus flowers and scallion pancakes through the courtyard, the years seem to fall away. For a brief, uninterrupted moment, they’re both back where they belong.

“Aiyah, shidi,” Wei Wuxian says. “Of course you will.”

#

The next time Jiang Cheng sees Lan Sizhui is at the cultivation conference in Gusu, two months later.

The boy smiles politely but greets him as ���Sect Leader Jiang’ again, and next to him, Jiang Cheng can feel Jin Ling wince. Lan Sizhui’s counterpart, the wildly opinionated and deeply un-Lan-like Lan Jingyi is giving him a frank, up-and-down appraisal.

“I mean, I’ll give it to you,” he says baldly. “You’re brave. Like, if Hanguang-jun hated me as much as he hated you, I just wouldn’t show up. You couldn’t pay me to show up.”

“Jingyi,” Lan Sizhui says at length.

“No, I know. I’m just saying. Young Mistress,” he adds, sweeping into a deep, performative bow in front of Jin Ling, “if you’ll come with me, your presence is earnestly awaited by Young Master Ouyang in the library pavilion.”

“Shut up, Jingyi, I swear,” Jin Ling snaps, but he lets himself be herded away with only a single worried glance back at his uncle.

Lan Sizhui is gazing up at Jiang Cheng with a complicated expression. Even though the explosive anger of that disastrous dinner doesn’t seem likely to make a reappearance, there is still something troubled in his eyes.

“I wanted to apologize, shushu,” the boy says slowly. “Properly, that is. For the way I spoke to you last time.”

Ah. So the stiffness isn’t born of lingering irritation, but worry. These Lans, Jiang Cheng thinks, with significantly less venom than he’s used to thinking of the Lan sect with.

He has a well of patience for his nephews that has never run dry. Jin Ling has stretched it nearly to the limit, more than once, but it will take Lan Sizhui more than one emotional outburst to come even close. Given that they’ve only been family (for given value of the word) for a short while, it makes sense that Lan Sizhui wouldn’t know that.

“It wasn’t you that I was angry with, not really,” Lan Sizhui says, explaining when Jiang Cheng has already largely guessed. “I know that you care about baba in your own way, even if a-die doesn’t think so. But—there are—”

His young face folds in frustration, less remarkably than Jin Ling’s does when he’s having a snit, but just a creased forehead speaks volumes in this repressed sect.

“There are other people. Who say similar things. And they don’t mean it the way you mean it.”

Jiang Cheng knows that. He attended those meetings, too.

“And let me guess,” he says, “my idiot brother doesn’t want you speaking up for him.”

Lan Sizhui’s mouth twists. “He says that he did horrible things, and those people are well within their rights to feel about him however they want to feel about him. But—he did good, too. He protected my clan, even though he had to do it alone. I don’t remember very much,” he goes on, slightly quieter, “but I know that he made the Burial Mounds a warm and safe place for me. I know that I never felt scared or cold or hungry when I was there with him. And I don’t think most people could have done that.”

Jiang Cheng boxes up the involuntary pain that swells into place at the poking of this half-healed wound, and gives himself a moment to organize a reply. Talking to the mind-healer his chief physician recommended to him has helped a lot, not that he’ll give that smug witch the satisfaction of admitting it.

“Wei Wuxian hurt a lot of people, but so did everyone else,” he says when he’s certain he can say it without losing his composure. “We were at war. None of us are blameless. He was just the most convenient scapegoat. He still is.”

Lan Sizhui’s eyes are bright with vindication. He was born a Wen and raised a Lan, but there’s a streak of Jiang in there, too, Jiang Cheng thinks with pride. It’s that love that Jiang Cheng recognizes, the same kind of love that he and jiejie and Wei Wuxian had cultivated between them since they were children—the vicious, untamed kind of love that marches to war and claws its way up from hell and clings too hard to things it rightly should let go of.

“It isn’t fair,” Lan Sizhui says.

“No,” Jiang Cheng allows. “It isn’t.”

#

Wei Wuxian waves animatedly at Jiang Cheng from across the room, even though it makes Lan Qiren scowl at him. It’s reminiscent of every single stuffy banquet they had to sit through as kids, making faces at one another when Madam Yu’s eyes were turned away.

Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes in return, and Wei Wuxian lights up like he’s been handed a pile of gold. Lan Wangji gazes at him with a tenderness that would be absolutely absurd if Wei Wuxian didn’t actually deserve every scant inch of it that got sent his way, and even though the entire cultivation world is waiting, he spares a moment to tuck a stray piece of hair behind Wei Wuxian’s ear.

Sect Leader Yao scoffs, a bit too loudly. “Shameless upstart.”

Lan Wangji’s eyes turn so sharp so fast that it promises violence.

Before he can say anything that starts another war, Jiang Cheng turns fully around in his seat.

“Problem?” he asks shortly.

Baffled, Sect Leader Yao’s gaze skates around the room for a moment before landing back on Jiang Cheng.

“If you have something to say about my brother,” Jiang Cheng says, his voice a snarl, zidian sparking on his arm, “say it so that I can hear you.”

“Ah, this meeting is off to such a lively start,” Wei Wuxian says into the ominous stillness of the room. “Shidi, you’re so energetic, why don’t you kick things off?”

It would be the first time in his career that he’s the first to speak at a conference. Openly disbelieving, Jiang Cheng looks from his brother to Lan Wangji. Lan Wangji’s eyes are narrowed, but not as though he’s sizing Jiang Cheng up for a coffin, which is how he usually sizes him up. All he does is tip his head incrementally, conceding the floor to him.

Gods. It’s that simple.

“You are really not a difficult person, are you?” Jiang Cheng says aloud.

“No,” Lan Wangji agrees, this force of nature who turned the world upside down and challenged every single person in it, who would do so again and again and again, just to be able to sit there and hold Wei Wuxian’s hand.

And then, in the closest the two of them have ever come to an understanding, Lan Wangji adds, “Neither are you.”

[bloody-bee-tea]

Mall

First part          Previous part

The only warning Jiang Cheng gets before Wei Wuxian drapes himself over his back is Lan Wangji’s low “Careful” right before Wei Wuxian’s shriek.

It gives Jiang Cheng enough time to brace himself, but the impact still punches the breath out of him.

“Jiang Cheng!” Wei Wuxian yells as if Jiang Cheng could have ignored his entrance and Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes, even though Wei Wuxian doesn’t care.

“What?” he bites out when Wei Wuxian doesn’t immediately start talking, and he closes his book.

He won’t get any more studying done with Wei Wuxian hanging off him like that, and he still struggles enough with this concept that he needs his full attention for the tasks they were assigned.

“It’s almost your birthday!” Wei Wuxian excitedly says, finally releasing Jiang Cheng and moving around the table to sit in front of him, almost vibrating out of his skin in excitement.

“It is?” Jiang Cheng mutters and realises with a start that Wei Wuxian is right.

It’s almost November.

Jiang Cheng nods gratefully at Lan Wangji when he sits down next to Wei Wuxian and puts a calming hand to his shoulder, because it means for just a moment Wei Wuxian is distracted enough that Jiang Cheng gets a moment to think.

He didn’t realize that time was passing by so quickly and that it was already time for his birthday.

Not that it means anything, because his birthday has never been anything special.

“What are you going to do?” Wei Wuxian asks him, when he manages to tear his eyes away from Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng looks down at the book in front of him.

“Nothing,” he says with a shrug. “Shouldn’t you worry about your birthday first?” he then asks before Wei Wuxian can pester him for more answers and that at least gets Wei Wuxian talking.

He’s planning a huge Halloween party—like every year—except that this time he’s planning to drag Lan Wangji and Lan Xichen into it, since he wants to do it at their place.

Jiang Cheng nods along with Wei Wuxian’s plans, because he didn’t really expect anything else.

Of course Wei Wuxian would just do as he normally does, and of course Lan Wangji is smitten enough with him that he doesn’t tell him off. Jiang Cheng is just surprised that Lan Xichen seemingly agreed to this, but then again the guy loves his brother and he would never do anything that would make Lan Wangji unhappy. And denying Wei Wuxian a huge ass part would make Wei Wuxian very unhappy, which would make Lan Wangji unhappy.

Jiang Cheng distantly wonders if Wei Wuxian realized that yet but then he thinks that if he had, he would be shamelessly exploiting it anyway.

“And it’ll be so epic,” Wei Wuxian finishes his rant and Jiang Cheng tunes back in, hoping that it at least looks like he was listening the whole time.

“Once we sobered up, we’ll get started on your birthday planning,” Wei Wuxian says with a huge smile and Jiang Cheng just barely suppresses a shiver.

“That’s not—” Jiang Cheng starts but he doesn’t even know what he wants to say. “I don’t—” 

Images of dinner with his parents flash through his mind and Jiang Cheng goes cold all over, remembering it. 

“See you,” he finally presses out as he quickly gathers his things, trying his damn hardest to keep his breath slow and even, but it’s not working so well, going by the wide-eyed look Wei Wuxian throws him, and even Lan Wangji seems worried.

Jiang Cheng is pretty sure that they are calling him back as he runs away from them, but he can’t really hear what they are saying over the rushing in his ears.

He didn’t realize that it was already that time of year. He tries to not think about his birthday too often and now that’s biting him in the ass, because it’s hitting him unprepared.

Jiang Cheng isn’t really paying attention as to where he’s running to but he comes to an abrupt stop when he realizes he’s on his way to Lan Qiren’s house.

Home, a very treacherous part of him thinks and Jiang Cheng tries to push that thought away.

Jiang Cheng has his own room there, has a key and his presence in the house is undeniable, but it still feels dangerous to think of it as his home. If he does, he admits that he’s attached and then it can slip through his fingers again.

But the house is the only thing that comes to mind when he thinks of the concept of home and Jiang Cheng isn’t even surprised to find that he never thinks of his parent’s house like that.

Jiang Cheng briefly thinks about going somewhere else like the fitness studio, or maybe even the library, but then he remembers Lan Xichen’s words and he knows he can’t do that.

If Lan Xichen catches him there, he’ll be disappointed and Jiang Cheng could never take that, but especially not today.

In the end Jiang Cheng keeps going where he was originally headed, and he lets out a relieved breath when he realizes that Lan Qiren isn’t at home yet.

It gives Jiang Cheng time to put himself together.

Sadly, it also gives him time to think about his birthday again.

Lan Qiren hasn’t said anything about his birthday yet, and Jiang Cheng knows what that means. He’s not doing good enough.

His grades are not the best, especially not lately, and of course Lan Qiren knows about that. Of course Jiang Cheng doesn’t deserve any kind of reward.

And he doesn’t even dare to think about asking Lan Qiren if he can have his siblings over on the weekend because he’s already imposing enough on Lan Qiren and he couldn’t possibly ask for more.

He can’t ask Wei Wuxian if they can do it at his place, cause he’s already having a huge party and it would be too much to ask Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji to host his party—as small as it may be—as well. Jiang Cheng doesn’t want to ask Jiang Yanli either, because he doubts Jin Zixuan would be happy about that and that really doesn’t leave him with any options.

And really, what does it matter anyway? He’s not sleeping in the streets and he should be thankful for that. Instead he is thinking about asking for more than he should and Jiang Cheng wonders if it will ever stop. If he will ever learn not to be too greedy, too demanding and instead learn his place.

Jiang Cheng mostly has his mind made up when he opens the door and steps into the house and it makes him feel better.

He’s not going to ask for anything. He doesn’t expect Lan Qiren to do anything special for him on that day—his parents never did, after all, and he’s not sure his grades warrant anything anyway—and he can survive one year without the usual sibling evening for his birthday.

It will be fine.

~*~*~

Jiang Cheng manages to put the thought of his birthday out of his mind for the most part, but of course there’s still this lingering nagging in his brain, insisting that maybe he just needs to talk to Lan Qiren for once, and that he’ll be surprised by what comes out.

But Jiang Cheng knows that’s stupid—has learned it for years and years, to never hope for anything—and so he keeps quiet. He doesn’t think Wei Wuxian or Lan Wangji said anything to Lan Qiren either; they have been more attentive ever since that last episode and would never force anything like this and Jiang Cheng is thankful for it.

Especially since the first tests are coming up and Jiang Cheng has to study hard for those; he doesn’t have time to worry over other things.

“I’m back,” Jiang Cheng calls out when he comes through the front door one day, and he frowns when he sees another pair of shoes in the hallway.

He wasn’t aware they were expecting anyone, but of course Lan Qiren can have guests over whenever he wants.

“Welcome home,” Lan Xichen calls out, clearly from the kitchen, and Jiang Cheng relaxes.

He doesn’t think anything of it, because Lan Xichen is over a lot lately, especially to help with cooking and teaching Jiang Cheng, but when he comes into view and sees Lan Qiren seated at the table and Lan Xichen deliberately disinterested in the kitchen Jiang Cheng tenses.

“What—did I do something wrong?” Jiang Cheng lowly asks, frozen in the doorway but he’s relieved to see that Lan Qiren immediately shakes his head.

“Of course not, Wanyin,” he reassures him, but he points at the chair opposite of him and Jiang Cheng reluctantly sits down.

He can’t remember doing anything wrong, but he probably just missed something.

He always does.

“Is this about my grades?” he carefully asks, because they did have a test today, and he wouldn’t be surprised if his was graded first, just so Lan Qiren can know how he’s doing.

“Should it be?” Lan Qiren asks with a frown, and Jiang Cheng barely has the chance to worry before Lan Xichen comes in.

“Uncle,” he says, clearly reminding Lan Qiren that this is not about that and Lan Qiren nods at him.

“No, it’s not,” Lan Qiren says to Jiang Cheng then, though he continues to be serious.

Much more serious than Jiang Cheng would like.

“Your birthday is coming up, right?” Lan Xichen asks, clearly in an attempt to diffuse the tension, but Jiang Cheng only tenses more at his words.

“Yes,” he curtly says and then falls silent, waiting for Lan Qiren to tell him where this is going.

He doesn’t want to say anything wrong after all.

“Do you have any plans? Any wishes?” Lan Qiren asks when it becomes clear that Jiang Cheng will not be the one to break the silence and Jiang Cheng ducks his head.

“I don’t—how are my grades?” Jiang Cheng wants to know and ducks his head again when Lan Qiren simply blinks at him.

“What does one have to do with the other?” Lan Qiren demands to know, making Jiang Cheng shrink back, but like always, Lan Xichen is there to intervene.

“Wanyin, if you don’t want to talk about it, you don’t have to,” he says and puts his hand on Jiang Cheng’s arm. “But if you want to, we’re here to listen.”

“Is that why you’re here?” Jiang Cheng asks to gain some time to bring his thoughts into order and Lan Xichen gives him a sheepish smile.

“We suspected that this might not be an easy topic for you since you never spoke about it before,” he admits. “And it seems that my presence helps sometimes.”

Jiang Cheng nods, because they are not wrong about either of those things, but he still stays silent because he doesn’t even know where to start.

“Why would your grades relate to your birthday?” Lan Qiren eventually gently prompts and Jiang Cheng takes a deep breath.

He keeps his eyes on the table, unable to meet Lan Qiren’s or Lan Xichen’s gaze as he talks about this.

Jiang Cheng would really rather not talk about this at all, but Lan Qiren has shown him in the past that he’s not like Jiang Cheng’s parents, so maybe this won’t be too bad and Jiang Cheng clings to that thought as he starts to talk.

“It’s just that—usually—I mean—“ he stutters out and finds that he’s not as calm as he thought he is about this.

The panic is right there, lodged in his throat and stomach and Jiang Cheng wants to shake with it, but Lan Xichen still has his hand on Jiang Cheng’s arm and he squeezes lightly.

“Take your time,” he tells him, and Jiang Cheng nods, but it still takes him a few minutes to get his breathing back under control.

“What I get for my birthday is dependent on the grades I have,” Jiang Cheng finally whispers, and he flinches when both Lan Xichen and Lan Qiren jerk at his words.

“What do you mean by that?” Lan Qiren asks him, clearly needing more of an explanation than this and Jiang Cheng grimaces.

“If my grades are not good, I’m not allowed to ask for anything,” Jiang Cheng mutters and decides not to tell them that in the eyes of his mother, his grades could never be good enough, no matter what he did.

“I don’t know how my grades are right now, so I’m not sure what I’m allowed to ask for,” Jiang Cheng finally finishes weakly, though he knows that his grades are hardly good enough to warrant any kind of reward, no matter how small it might be.

“You’re allowed to ask for anything,” Lan Qiren tells him, but Jiang Cheng shakes his head.

He knows he is not.

“I don’t--I’m not even sure I passed the test today, there’s nothing I could—” Jiang Cheng trails off, his breath speeding up again.

He never admitted to his failings before, never dared too, but now it simply slipped out and the panic is gripping him hard. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he chokes out. “I promise to do better, I’ll study more,” Jiang Cheng tries, but deep down he wonders how long Lan Qiren will allow him to fuck up like this.

They all know he’s too stupid for that particular subject and it can only be a matter of time before Lan Qiren—and Lan Xichen as well—get fed up with his empty promises.

“Breathe, Wanyin,” Lan Xichen gently reminds him, and Jiang Cheng itches to obey him, but it still takes him a while before his breath comes easy again.

“I didn’t do anything to earn a celebration of my birth yet,” Jiang Cheng finally mutters when he feels stable again and he fears he did something wrong again when absolute silence settles over the kitchen.

Jiang Cheng isn’t even sure if Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen are still breathing, but he’s too scared to check.

“That hateful woman,” Lan Qiren eventually chokes out and he sounds as mad as Jiang Cheng has ever heard him.

It only makes him lower his head even further and he brings his shoulders up, because if he already made Lan Qiren this angry then Jiang Cheng doesn’t want to do anything else to anger him further.

“I’m sorry,” Jiang Cheng whispers, desperately wishing that he just never came home, that they never brought this horrible topic up, but regrets never got him anywhere. It’s already done after all.

 “I am not angry with you,” Lan Qiren says and suddenly it’s him at Jiang Cheng’s side and no longer Lan Xichen.

“But you sound—” Jiang Cheng whispers, because Lan Qiren sounded so angry and Jiang Cheng knows that never means anything good.

“I’m not angry with you,” Lan Qiren sighs again. “I am angry with your parents.”

“Oh,” Jiang Cheng says, because that he didn’t expect. “I mean, they always were there for dinner on my birthday, so it’s not so bad,” he tries to explain, but Lan Qiren shakes his head.

“It is that bad,” he simply states. “Here in this house we celebrate your birthday. What would you like?” he asks and Jiang Cheng can only blink at him.

“But I didn’t—” he cuts himself off before he can say ‘earn it yet’ because with how this afternoon is going, he doesn’t think Lan Qiren would be too happy about it.

“What would you like?” Lan Qiren repeats softly and Jiang Cheng turns questioning eyes on Lan Xichen, hoping that he can help him.

“It’s your birthday, Wanyin,” Lan Xichen says with a small smile, even though it does look a little bit sad. “Of course you will get presents.”

Jiang Cheng worries his lower lip, because never before did he have to articulate a wish to a guardian or parent before and he doesn’t know what to ask for.

Oh, he does know what he wants to ask for, but he’s still not sure this won’t come back to bite him in the ass, so he figures it’s best to play it safe for now.

“Jiang Wanyin, you’re the best son anyone could wish for and you deserve to get something you really want on your birthday,” Lan Qiren suddenly speaks up and Jiang Cheng jerks with his words, before his eyes dart over to Lan Xichen again.

He’s worried he’ll take this the wrong way, that he will be mad with Jiang Cheng for taking that praise away from him, but Lan Xichen only smiles at him.

“He’s right, Wanyin,” Lan Xichen says with a shrug. “Don’t look that startled, I know what you think, and it’s different. Wangji and I are his nephews.”

“That’s not true, Xichen,” Lan Qiren says and now he’s reaching out for Lan Xichen. “I have raised you since you were five and Wangji since he was two. I don’t see you as my nephews, I see you as my sons. And all three of you make me very, very proud.”

“Oh,” Lan Xichen breathes out and his surprise makes Lan Qiren’s words a little easier to bear for Jiang Cheng. He isn’t used to parents giving praise out that easily. Usually it’s a competition and praise is a limited goods. “I didn’t actually know that,” Lan Xichen mutters eventually and Lan Qiren sighs.

“And that’s on me,” Lan Qiren immediately says. “I should have made that clear sooner. I’m sorry.”

Jiang Cheng’s head is spinning with Lan Qiren’s words; not only did he admit to making a mistake but he also apologized for it—which adults never do, in Jiang Cheng’s experience—but he also praised Jiang Cheng in the same breath as Lan Wangji and Lan Xichen, who are objectively the better students.

Arguably even the better humans, but Jiang Cheng tries to push that thought far away.

“Thank you for saying it now,” Lan Xichen says and now he’s practically beaming at Lan Qiren, who all of a sudden seems very uncomfortable with the situation.

“Nonsense,” he grumbles and tugs on his beard a few times, before he turns his attention back on Jiang Cheng. “Now to get back to what you want for your birthday,” he says and Jiang Cheng thinks that maybe it’s time to just accept that Lan Qiren really means this.

That this year Jiang Cheng is allowed to wish for something.

“I—there’s this program,” Jiang Cheng starts hesitantly but when Lan Qiren nods encouragingly at him, he continues. “A computer program for architects,” Jiang Cheng finishes in a whisper and Lan Qiren’s eyes light up.

“Architecture? You’re interested in that?”

“Yes,” Jiang Cheng admits and looks down at his hands. “I usually only doodle a few sketches—of course, only when I’m done with my studies and homework—but it would be nice to plan something in a program for once.”

“I never doubt that you’re working very hard and finishing all of your duties before you relax,” Lan Qiren reassures him. “So you would want the program?”

“Yes,” Jiang Cheng whispers but this time it’s Lan Xichen who starts talking.

“But can your laptop handle it? I have seen it and it’s verging on the older side, isn’t it? Will the program still run on there?”

Well, the one Jiang Cheng very desperately wants will not, but they don’t have to know that. Jiang Cheng can probably safe up for a new laptop in less than a year if he’s smart about it.

“Yes,” he says, but it seems like Lan Qiren looks right through him, because he throws him a look.

It makes Jiang Cheng shrink back on instinct but then he huffs out a laugh.

At least Lan Qiren notices when Jiang Cheng is lying to him.

“I mean—the more simple ones will,” he amends his previous statement and Lan Qiren nods as if it’s decided.

“Wangji and me will get the program then,” Lan Xichen says, more to Lan Qiren than to Jiang Cheng and Jiang Cheng frowns.

“And I will get the new laptop,” Lan Qiren says and Jiang Cheng stares at him.

“That would be way too much! You shouldn’t do that!”

“It’s your birthday, of course we should. Actually, I’m not quite as versed in these things, and I’m not sure what kind of requirements the laptop would need, so why don’t you go with Xichen to the mall and see if you can find something that would fit your needs?”

“I’ll make sure he picks something that’s not outdated in a year,” Lan Xichen says with a teasing smile and Jiang Cheng blushes.

“You really don’t have to do that. Just the one program would be enough.”

“Nonsense,” Lan Qiren immediately says. “You will get something good for your birthday.”

“Alright,” Jiang Cheng whispers, unbearably happy with how this whole talk turned out and he has to fight the urge to hug Lan Qiren, his eyes burning with emotions.

He’s not one for too much physical contact, Jiang Cheng has noticed that before, and so Jiang Cheng sits on his hands.

“One hug won’t kill him,” Lan Xichen whispers as he leans over the table, absolutely loud enough for Lan Qiren to hear and Jiang Cheng flushes again.

“It won’t,” Lan Qiren agrees and even moves his chair a bit back in invitation.

And Jiang Cheng really can’t pass something like that up, so he gets up and immediately darts in for a hug.

Despite not liking them, Lan Qiren is very good at them, and Jiang Cheng would never complain if they lasted a bit longer, but he doesn’t want to overdo it, so he pulls away after a short while.

“Thank you,” he whispers and Lan Qiren awkwardly pats his shoulder.

“You are very welcome, Wanyin. Now tell me how you want to celebrate.”

“What?”

“I’m guessing you want your siblings to come over? And maybe Wangji and Xichen? I heard you’re friends with Huaisang, too? Invite him as well, if you want to.”

“For—lunch?” Jiang Cheng hesitantly asks but Lan Qiren frowns.

“Don’t youths usually do dinner and a movie or something?” he asks and Lan Xichen snorts out a laugh.

“Or something,” he says with a nod and Jiang Cheng’s own mouth twitches as well but he bites it back.

“The curfew,” Jiang Cheng starts and then ends with a shrug.

He really doesn’t want to impose this on Lan Qiren as well, but Lan Qiren shakes his head.

“Your birthday is on a Friday, right? I don’t see why you couldn’t stay up a little bit longer on your birthday.”

“We can do it at our place, uncle,” Lan Xichen offers, even though Jiang Cheng didn’t even ask him and Lan Xichen smiles at him.

“Wanyin could sleep over, and you wouldn’t have to worry about him or stay up for far longer than you normally do.”

It’s a reasonable suggestion, but Jiang Cheng never wanted to ask Lan Xichen about this in the first place, not with how Wei Wuxian will have his party at their place as well, but when both Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen look expectantly at him, he can’t refuse them.

“Sounds good,” he chokes out and immediately Lan Xichen’s smile is back.

“Perfect! Just let me know what you’d like for dinner and snacks and I’ll get everything ready.”

“No,” Jiang Cheng interjects, because he will not allow Lan Xichen do to everything. “I can cook and go shopping as well. It’s my party; I should at least help, right?”

“That’s very nice of you to offer,” Lan Qiren says and nods at Jiang Cheng and Lan Xichen. “You can do it at your place, but let him help.”

“Alright,” Lan Xichen easily agrees and it does make Jiang Cheng feel a little bit better.

“Thank you,” he whispers to both of them and his eyes start to burn when both Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen put a hand to his shoulders.

“Always,” Lan Xichen immediately says and Lan Qiren nods.

“That’s what family is like,” he softly tells him and Jiang Cheng nods, not trusting his voice to hold out at all.

Lan Qiren said something like that before, and all of his actions are very in line with it as well, and Jiang Cheng might just start trusting that he is safe here, with them.

It would be so very nice to not be proven wrong this time.

Link to my ko-fi on the sidebar!

[morifinwes]

Lauraa I finished all the fics, apart from decay (currently reading that now) and I love it sm! Especially the lip gloss one lmao the whole thing was so hilarious to me XD but also like the concept of lwj wearing lipgloss is >>> -yibobibo

@yibobibo then i'm going to rec you some more!! the lip gloss one was !!!!! ajsksks yes!! lwj wearing lipgloss is just so!! good!!

modern

this one is the painful one i talked about:

visitations by var_abelasan (12K, wip, divorced wangxian, post divorce, most of this is angst, uhm lowkey don't but also do want wangxian to end up together, it's messy, the jiangs & lans are shitty, wwx was in prison (brief mentions of that but it's kind of a major plot point), mxy & xy are the little brothers he never wanted but wwx picked them up anyways)

"Wei Ying-" Lan Zhan says, stutters, "I'm sorry." 

And now Wei Wuxian sees it, the red rimming Lan Zhan's eyes, the rumpled edges of his blazer. There is an old, familiar urge for him to reach over, to hold Lan Zhan's hand and smooth his hair, to tell him that everything will be fine. 

"We're all a bit sorry about this, I think," he says instead, and finds that he means it. For Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji and everyone else in that Guanyin temple, the pain must be unbearably fresh, like skin just flayed open. But Wei Wuxian's chest had been cracked open a long time ago, his wounds licked and cauterized and sewn shut over five long years - Ever hurting, but a dull, constant ache, "It's really alright, Lan Zhan."

 

Five years after being accused of corporate espionage and losing everything, the Guanyin Scandal breaks open and Wei Wuxian finds a familiar face at his door.

please don't let me be misunderstood by sysrae (3K, partly deaf!wwx, lwj notices, nobody else does though, idk wwx is like made out of fucking steel or some shit)

Lan Wangji has known Wei Ying for a fortnight, the first time he sees him get hit by a car.

light by redkosmos (10K, blind!lwj, which causes angst, but they manage it, best friends to lovers, fluff, lwj being insecure and feeling like a burden, college au kind of? but it doesn't matter too much)

The realization slowly dawns on him.

He can never again see the brightness of Wei Ying's eyes, the way they crescent when he smiles, never again see the rich black of his hair, the mess of it in the early mornings, never again see the beautiful tan of his skin, the beauty of the scars and marks adorned on it, how he wears his clothes, how it hugs his frame beautifully, how he looks like he's adorably swimming in cloth when he wears Lan Zhan's, and-

(Lan Zhan loses his vision in a car accident and learns to cope with it.)

don't leave me by trippinonskies (19K, brief very brief mention of lwj cheating, he doesn't but wwx is afraid lwj is cheating on him or just wants to break up with him, (he doesn't), marriage proposal, lwj acting distant = wwx's insecurities show up, fluff, angst and comfort)

Lan Zhan! Where are you lost today?” Wei Wuxian finally asks, at the end of his patience.

Lan Zhan looks a little guilty as he looks at Wei Wuxian, “Sorry, just a lot of work to deal with.”

Lie.

If there is one thing Lan Zhan can’t do, it’s lying. Especially to Wei Wuxian. But he doesn’t question Lan Zhan. He just accepts the reply, too scared to know that he is right. Too scared to know the truth.

// or where Lan Zhan is too hung up in planning the perfect proposal and ends up accidently ignoring Wei Wuxian making the other think that he wants to break up //

want you closer by xiaobucephalus ((3K, HORSES, only in the background tho, but wwx is an equestrian vet, which is so fucking valid bro, the lans own horses, a sick bunny, lwj the bunny parent!, super cute, dark bay throughoutbred chenqing is honestly so valid)

“Thank you,” Lan Zhan said, breathing a sigh of relief.

“Don’t thank me, Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying laughed again, his voice warming the chill of fear that had settled in his chest. “I’ve been looking for an excuse to get into your hutch for a while anyway.”

safe in your thoughts by anonymous (20K, it's a cherry magic au???? (i haven't watched it, but you have i think?), horny lwj but only for wwx (always for wwx))

Wei Wuxian learns three very important things on the night of his twenty-seventh birthday.

One, that Lan Wangji is ridiculously funny, which Wei Wuxian had known before but what Wei Wuxain hadn’t expected was Lan Wangji to be funny at his brother’s expense.

Two, that Wei Wuxian had finally gone mad, absolutely mental at the ripe age of twenty seven because nothing else would explain the third thing he had learnt.

Third, and the most unbelievable of the lot, that Lan Wangji wants to fuck him.

iura by yoo_im_finally_writing (1K, only added bcs op is right and wwx would've the cutest german accent, it's more fun if you understand german so hit me up if you want translations for the german sentences)

Wei Ying calls in the middle of the night to talk about German law, and Lan Zhan tries very hard not to fall asleep. Or at least, not to let Wei Ying notice he's falling asleep. (As best friends do.)

breathe in the air, the last of its kind by wereworm / @neverdoingmuch (27K, getting together, jealous!lwj, but also kind of supportive, brief mention of cheating bcs of miscommunication, no actual cheating tho, college au, lwj pov)

Following Wei Ying’s line of sight, Lan Wangji can barely prevent a smile from crossing his lips when he sees the short row of rabbit statuettes placed at the front of the display. Silver, with bright gems for eyes, they look elegant yet lively and animated.

“A-Yuan would love one of those,” Wei Ying murmurs, almost as if to himself.

Lan Wangji frowns; the rabbits, while cute, don’t seem like a suitable gift for Wei Ying’s A-Yuan.

...

It’s only when he glances back at the rabbits and notices what has been placed on display behind them, that the pieces fall into place. They’re engagement rings, there’s no doubt about it. Lan Wangji feels his heart sink – Wei Ying isn’t just dating A-Yuan, he wants to propose to him.

Or: the five times Lan Wangji thinks that A-Yuan is Wei Ying’s boyfriend and the one time he learns the truth.

paint smears on sunny days by snowshadowao3 / @angstsexual (53K, getting together, art teacher!wwx, single parent!lwj, they're rich if i remember right, wwx & lwj are both good with kids!!!, this is so good actually, fluff)

To say that he runs to his car would be incorrect, as he is a Lan, and running is both undignified and unnecessary unless in immediate danger. Nor does he slam his key into the ignition, or aggressively swerve around the cars on the freeway, or have a mild panic attack at the fact he is picking A-Yuan up late from school for the first time ever.

He comes close, though.

By the time he arrives, it’s 4:35PM, and he has imagined about fifty different worse-case scenarios. The door is partly open when he gets to it, a messy label of 104B—Art Room scrawled with chalk on a placard next to the faded wood. As he opens it fully, he expects to see a wailing, terrified child, or perhaps a scene of utter misery and betrayal.

What he finds is his son, hands covered in paint, being sung to by a beautiful, dark-haired stranger.

“Ducks live in the pond, yellow ducks, happy ducks!”

Lan Wangji stops in his tracks.

(Or: Falling in love with your son’s art teacher, in five parts)

no bunny compares by gusucloudbunny (4K, god this is cute, fluff)

“Lan Zhan!” Wei Wuxian cornered his friend one week before his birthday. “If you could have anything in the world, what would it be?”

Lan Wangji furrowed his brow at Wei Wuxian, not exactly sure how to answer that question in a truthful manner that didn’t involve confessing his undying love for his best friend.

Wei Wuxian is on a mission to get Lan Wangji the perfect gift for his birthday. What Wei Wuxian doesn't know is that the only thing Lan Wangji truly wants is him.

wei wuxian's week of realizing things by photojenny (12K, i have read this multiple times, i always forget what happens, idk why but my notes say it's good, the tags say drunkji makes an appearance and i'm always up for that)

"Lan Zhan, do you like Mianmian?" asked Wei Wuxian.

Lan Wangji blinked, and stared. It was not the first time Lan Wangji had questioned the perceptiveness of the boy he had a crush on. Wei Wuxian had been smart in the class they had taken together. Yet time and time again, Wei Wuxian had tested the old wisdom that there are no stupid questions.

---

Lan Wangji must figure out how to confess when Wei Wuxian is the most oblivious person he's ever met.

are you my wisdom tooth? because i'd like to take you out by yellowcarnations (1K, crack, fluff, lwj stop flirting with a stranger, even if he is your husband, drunkji but make it to max level)

Lan Zhan wakes up and he has no idea where he is.

There are bright lights and his jaw hurts, he doesn't who this man next to his bed is but oh he might be in love, maybe, probably, definitely.

–

based off that guy-forgets-who-his-wife-is-and-hits-on-her vid but its wangxian.

beep! goes his heart by wearing_tearing (3K, fluff, lwj is like "he, he likes me right? he likes me" and everyone is like "yes, yes he does")

“Wei Ying’s heart monitor,” Lan Wangji starts.

Wen Qing blinks at him. “Yes?”

“It beeps.”

“That’s… what they generally do, yes.”

“The beeps change,” Lan Wangji continues, “when others are around.”

*

Wei Ying’s heart only sings for Lan Wangji.

canon

obedient and bellicose by thunderwear (19K, lwj is cursed by the lan elders, they notice too late, fix-it fic kind of?, lqr being a good uncle and lxc is a good brother, wwx accidentally uses the curse but he doesn't know about it)

It took Lan Wangji a long time to realize he was cursed. Too long really, anyone else would have noticed so much sooner. The problem was, he liked following the rules.

Ella Enchanted AU that no one needed but I wanted.

hello my old heart, how have you been? by ravenditefairylights (10K, amnesia, fluff, wwx taking care of lwj, so much fluff and softness, angst too but not that much)

The issue is, Lan Wangji brings his thoughts back before they stray too far, that it is impossible for someone to be in his bed, unless Lan Wangji himself invited them. He has not. He would remember doing so, and besides, all his night clothes are still on and there is no headache to imply that he was inebriated last night. No, the situation is simple.

There is someone in Lan Wangji’s bed. It is impossible for anyone to be in Lan Wangji’s bed, and yet that doesn’t seem to have stopped the stranger.

or lan wangji wakes up, and wei ying is there. he doesn't understand how or why, and he can understand even less why his hallucination of wei ying is so insistent on bathing him, and braiding his hair, on holding him and fixing his clothes. why the hallucination of wei ying seems so happy to see him.

teach me the way by likeafox (58K, rogue cultivator!wwx, horny wangxian, lwj wants wwx to teach him how to be a good lover, ....wwx is a virgin, the porn is the plot, but there's less of it than i thought)

"I do not wish to leave my future spouse… dissatisfied with my intimate knowledge,” Lan Zhan says, very seriously. “I am hoping to find an instructor, to better prepare myself for such matters."

Wei Ying feels his mouth drop open. He's pretty sure the Second Jade of Lan just told him he's a virgin who wants to learn how to do sex good.

Rogue Cultivator Wei Wuxian is the stuff of local legends. Some of those legends are even true! The ones about his tremendous experience in bed, on the other hand, are not so true. Which becomes a problem when Lan Wangji, on the verge of an arranged marriage and worried he won’t know how to please his future spouse, enlists Wei Ying's help to teach him the art of love-making. Wei Ying's great at improvisation, though, and is pretty sure he's got this sex mentor thing under control. What could possibly go wrong

other aus

of god: my love unholy by tunnelodfawn (3K, tw blood / war, dark!lwj, god!wwx, kind of poetry)

Lan Zhan takes everything as a sign from his god. The blood staining his fingertips—a holy anointment. He sanctifies himself through blood. The strings of his guqin gleam red in the sun—a divine blessing. This is an instrument of destruction. A single note—a cry of power—and in this note the voice of his god unravels the earthly threads tethering man to earth.

The Yiling Patriarch blesses Lan Zhan with war. Wei Wuxian blesses Lan Zhan with agility. Wei Ying blesses Lan Zhan with love.

The base of the Yiling Patriarch’s shrine is the home of Lan Zhan’s knees. He worships. There is something of the blasphemous and the unholy in his prayers. He prays not for victory but for the sight of Wei Ying. Bless me with your presence, he begs.

Or, wherein, Lan Zhan bridges the gap between the mortal and the divine—the worshipper and the god—with blood.

the river and the sea by sasamelons / @sasamelons (7K, soulmate au, arranged marriage (wangxian with each other), they're both kind of dumb but i love it)

Lan Wangji gritted his teeth, wishing to just be left alone. "I am looking for my soulmate," he ground out.

"Oh."

It took Lan Wangji a few moments to realize that Wei Wuxian had stopped following him. When he looked back, the other boy seemed to be frozen to the spot, eyes wide and lips still parted. He quickly looked away when he saw Lan Wangji looking back. "I see. Well, have a good trip!"

--

At six years old, Lan Zhan met his soulmate on the streets of Yiling and promptly lost him again.

At sixteen years old, Lan Wangji met his betrothed and was determined not to like him.

[mjsakurea]

If Words Could Heal Scars (Fic)

"I'm sorry and thank you"

Wei Wuxian allows those words to convey every unsaid emotion, every word he cannot say. He has learned these phrases are the most important words one can say in one's life. He would utter them like a prayer for the rest of his life and it would still not be enough to make up for the pain Lan Zhan has endured on his behalf, but he can start with saying them thirty-three times.

Dedicated to @zelkam

Based on their absolutely amazing and heartbreaking art that just left me so inspired to write a fic. It broke me out of year’s worth of writer’s block so thank you so much for making it! I hope this fic can capture the same feelings the art induced. 

Read on AO3 or continue reading below

Wei Wuxian knelt in front of his makeshift lotus pond. He had just finished hauling buckets of water to fill it. It would be time to plant the seeds soon. The weather was growing steadily colder by the day which meant he had to work tirelessly to get them planted before it was too late in the season. As he looked at his pond—less a pond and more a mud puddle—he sighed. It would be a miracle if any of the seeds sprouted, but, attempting the impossible was what his—well, his former clan was known for. If he thought too long about his brief visit with his adopted siblings, he knew he would start to get homesick for Lotus Pier. He knew he would most likely never return there and see the endless lakes filled with lotus blossoms ever again. Best to get to work and not dwell on the fact, Wei Wuxian thought.

“Wen Ning,” he shouted, “hand me that trowel.”

Wen Ning’s head perked up from where he was helping bag fresh turnips. “Yes, Young Master Wei!” He snatched the hand trowel and jogged over to the lotus pond. As he was about to hand it over to Wei Wuxian, his foot caught on an exposed root and he fumbled with the trowel. It slipped from his hands as he attempted to regain his footing. It missed Wei Wuxian and landed in the mud pit with a spalt, slashing some mud up on Wei Wuxian’s face and robes.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Wei Wuxian heard Wen Ning repeatedly mumbling as he flicked the mud off his face. He reached into the shallow pool and delicately lifted the drenched trowel between his thumb and middle finger.

“Wen Ning,” Wei Ying said to interrupt the still muttering man, “it’s alright, no need to be sorry.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Wen Ning said looking down at his feet.

“Now what are you sorry about? Stop saying sorry so much, there’s really no need.”

“Sister says, ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘thank you’ are the two most important phrases you can say,” Wen Ning admitted.

Wei Wuxian smiled softly. “Well, your sister is very wise, but don’t tell her I said that,” he said.

“Tell me you said what?” Wen Qing said, appearing out of nowhere to catch Wei Wuxian at the worst possible moment as she does best.

Wen Ning greeted his sister excitedly while Wei Ying tried to escape admitting he ever paid Wen Qing a compliment, trowel incident and apologies forgotten.

He takes it back now, Wen Qing was not wise, she was an idiot, an absolute fool. Wei Wuxian writhed on the stone slab which served as his bed in Demon Subdue Palace. He fought desperately against the toxin flowing into his body through Wen Qing’s needle, keeping his body stiff and limbs immovable. Wei Ying screamed at Wen Qing and Wen Ning as the siblings revealed their plan to him. They were going to turn themselves in. They would be executed without a doubt. They knew this, they must have, so why, why would they want to face certain death and leave him all alone.

His screams slowly turned into sobs. Wei Wuxian begged them not to go. He should be the one to go instead. He continued pleading as Wen Qing knelt next to him and flicked a sleeping spell on his forehead. His eyelids suddenly felt heavy. He forced them to stay open with fading strength.

“No, Wen Qing,” he said weakly.

“I didn’t tell you many times, but today, something needs to be said,” Wen Qing began. Wei Ying shook his head, pleading with his eyes. “Or from now on, I won’t have a chance.”

“No,” he said, feeling his eyelids droop closed against his will. He could no longer fight the spell pulling him to sleep. Her final words drifted to him as though from afar.

“I’m sorry, and thank you.”

  Wei Wuxian leaned up against a tree to catch his breath after running into the forest with Jin Ling. His eyes flickered across the surrounding terrain. Despite Jin Ling telling him Fairy would not trouble him, he still had his doubts. After all, dogs could not be trusted, even this so-called wonder dog. He had a feeling Jiang Cheng bought the dog for Jin Ling just to spite Wei Wuxian. After his run-in with Jiang Cheng earlier, it was clear his hatred had not abated in these 16 years Wei Ying had been dead. Jin Ling confirmed that as he told Wei Wuxian of the numerous times his uncle had caught those under suspicion of being the reincarnated Yiling Patriarch.  Luckily, Jin Ling’s skepticism saved him from Jiang Cheng’s wrath for now.

“I tell you, you have saved me indeed, but I won’t thank you,” Jin Ling shouts at him. Wei Wuxian rolled his eyes. It was his fault this kid grew up without learning any manners, he supposed. If he must, he would try and teach him some himself.

“Young man, in a person’s life, he must learn to say two phrases,” Wei Ying began, stepping in front of his nephew.

“Which two?”

“Thank you and sorry.”

Jin Ling scoffed at him. “I just don’t want to, what can you do with that?”

“You will say it while crying someday.” Trust me, I know from experience, left unsaid. Wei Wuxian paused, taking a deep breath. “Jin Ling, I’m sorry.”

  Wei Wuxian struggled with his words. His heart was full with all he wanted to say to Lan Zhan. After his enlightening conversation with Zewu Jun, he regarded Lan Wangji with a different light. He had resented Lan Zhan’s constant criticism back then, back in his first life. But now, he knew Lan Zhan’s actions were out of love. Even now, every little thing—bringing him Emperor’s Smile, playing this soft, familiar melody on the guqin—was done with love. Lan Zhan loved him. Wei Wuxian chuckled at the revelation, gazing absentmindedly out at the glittering snow falling on Cloud Recesses. That realization should have shocked him, he thought, but if anything, it calmed his racing mind. He realized with perfect clarity, as well, that he loved Lan Zhan. Wei Ying did not know what words could possibly begin to convey all his love, his adoration, his regret, and his sorrow. However, he took a swig of Emperor’s Smile and made an attempt.

“Lan Zhan, I’m sorry, and thank you,” he whispered from where he leaned on the doorframe of the Jingshi.

Lan Zhan glanced up at him briefly with the barest hint of a smile before returning his eyes to his instrument. No, that would not do, Wei Wuxian thought. He took a step inside the room and turned to pull the doors to the Jingshi shut, barring out the cold winter air. Swiveling back to face Lan Wangji, he took a few steps forward while reaching behind to tug off his belt. Wei Wuxian knelt next to the low table, set down his jug of Emperor’s Smile, and shrugged his outer robe off his shoulders. Lan Zhan regarded him quizzically.

Wei Ying stepped over to the other side of the table. He knelt once again and gripped Lan Zhan’s shoulders, guiding him to stand. He slid his hands down the other man’s arms before clutching at his wrist with one hand. Gently, he pulled Lan Wangji towards the bed. Wei Wuxian sat down whilst pulling Lan Zhan down to sit in front of him. Reaching up to the back of his neck, Wei Ying delicately swept Lan Zhan’s silky hair to the side so that it draped in front of his chest. He smoothed his hands over Lan Wangji’s broad shoulders before softly gripping the top of his robes.

“Wei Ying?” Lan Zhan questioned.

“Is this okay?”

“Mn,” Lan Zhan said with a slight nod, still seeming confused, but willing to go along with it.

Wei Wuxian nodded back even though he knew Lan Zhan was facing the wrong way to see him. Gripping the top of his robes, Wei Ying gently pulled them down, exposing Lan Zhan’s back. Wei Wuxian gasped as the scarred skin was exposed. He had seen Lan Zhan’s back from a distance in the Cold Springs but seeing it up close—even in the dim light of the Jingshi—was heartbreaking, especially now he knew the origin of these thirty-three whip scars. Each of these scars represented someone Lan Zhan protected Wei Ying from. Thirty-three people from his own clan, his own family who he fought to save him. Wei Wuxian idly traced the outline of a few of them with his fingers. Tears welled up in his eyes. Lan Wangji dropped his head down.

“Your brother told me what happened,” Wei Wuxian admitted. “Lan Zhan, I—”

“Wei Ying, it is—”

“No,” Wei Ying interrupted. He could guess Lan Zhan’s intention to say it was okay or it was fine. “Just—just let me—.” Wei Wuxian was not entirely sure what he was asking Lan Zhan to let him do, but Lan Zhan nodded his head anyway, glancing at Wei Ying over his shoulder.

Wei Wuxian lowered his head to rest his cheek against Lan Zhan’s back. He felt Lan Zhan flinch under him as he felt a cold tear slip down Wei Wuxian’s face and onto his exposed back. Then, he froze as Wei Ying turned his head and pressed a faint kiss to one of the scars.

“I’m sorry and thank you.”

Another kiss.

“I’m sorry and thank you.”

Another kiss.

The routine continued for each individual scar. Wei Wuxian pressed his lips to the raised skin and whispered his endless sorrow and gratitude. With every utterance, he conveyed unspoken words from his heart. He spoke with unbridled reverence and worshipped every scar with each kiss.

I’m sorry you were hurt because of me.

I’m sorry I left you behind.

I’m sorry I took so long to come back to you.

Thank you for waiting.

Thank you for protecting me.

Thank you for loving me.

Wei Wuxian could think of a unique reason behind every single apology and thanks. He owed Lan Zhan everything. Thirty-three sorry’s and thank you’s could barely scratch the surface. He could scream it from the clifftops for the rest of his life and it still would not be enough.

After the last scar, Wei Wuxian lifted his head up while letting his hand linger against Lan Zhan’s back, rubbing in lazy circles. He stared, but his eyes were unfocused.

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan said, sensing his troubled mind.

“Lan Zhan,” Wei Wuxian said. He paused before continuing, “You could have died.”

“I did not,” Lan Zhan stated.

“But you could have! Lan Zhan, I’m not going to ask you if these hurt because I know you’d lie to me, I know they must have hurt. You were in so much pain. All this for me, and you might not have even made it out alive. I’m not worth it, Lan Zhan. What if you died. It would have been my fault—”

“If I died, it would have been fine.”

“Lan Zhan—”

Lan Wangji twisted around to fully face Wei Wuxian. “It would have been fine because I would have been reunited with you, Wei Ying,” he said, staring directly into the other’s tear-filled eyes.

Wei Ying laughed softly and swiped a tear from his eye. “Lan Zhan, you can’t just say things like that.”

“Wei Ying, I—”

Wei Wuxian put a finger up to Lan Zhan’s lips before he could continue. “I know,” he said, taking a deep breath. “I love you too, Lan Zhan.”

Lan Zhan’s face shifted in a genuine smile, one that to anyone other than Wei Wuxian might not have even been noticed as a smile, but Wei Wuxian saw it for what it really was, a smile brighter than the sun. “Then,” Lan Zhan began, “you should know that there is no need for apologies or thanks between us.”

Wei Wuxian sighed. “I know, I know, just let me get it out of my system.” He reached up to delicately hold Lan Wangji’s face between his palms.

“I’m sorry and thank you,” he said for the last time before he closed the distance between them and kissed Lan Zhan. He worshipped his lips as he worshipped his scars, kissing Lan Zhan tenderly. Lan Zhan kissed him back just as passionately, yet not rushed. Sorry’s and thank you’s behind them, they had all the time in the world to prove to each other that those words were no longer necessary between them.  Even so, Wei Wuxian would know the importance of those two phrases for as long as he lived.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 07 part one

(Masterpost)

Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

Clan Sanren

Lanny Granny gets a second wind and continues her Yin Iron Webinar.

Wei Wuxian explains that although he was adopted by the Jiang Clan, Baoshan Sanren is his grandmaster, via his mom. Lan Yi claims to think that this is pretty great.

Lan Yi: Wow, amazing, my ex girlfriend who I dumped has settled down and started her own family Clan now, that’s so great. I’m so happy for her. So happy. So great. I mean, when I left I didn’t really picture her finding happiness first, you know? I kind of expected to have settled down myself by now but it’s hard to date when you’re trapped in an ice cave putting headbands on rabbits for 100 years. But it’s fine! I love my life and I’m sure eventually I’ll find that special rabbit person.  Anyway I’m just...SUPER happy for Baoshan. Really. Really happy. For Baoshan. 

Lan Wangji also appears to have thoughts about it, because he reacts pretty intently.

 Lan+Sanren 4EvR. 

Wang Yibo is looking extra fine in this cave sequence, with no headband to distract from his fierce eyebrows.  

Lan Wangji asks Lan Yi if she’s the one who pulled them into the cave, and she says nope, and then nobody ever explains how they ended up in the cave. “Perhaps it’s destiny” does not count as an explanation. 

Lan Gran explains that her battery is running down. The Lan bunnies are not energizer bunnies, apparently. She also tells them that it’s impossible to destroy the Yin Iron and that the only solution is to put it back in the cave and try to suppress it again. 

(more after the cut)

However by Episode 23 it inexplicably becomes super easy to destroy the Yin Iron...

...meaning Lan Yi spent 100 years in a cave for nothing, other than writing the Definitive Guide to Rabbit Headbands. 

Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji get back into Hardy Boys cultivator mode, but this time with an extremely long held gaze, which I think is their first time doing this.

I mean...even if these boys are 100% neurotypical (and hello, they are not), this is a LOT of eye contact. I can't gaze that long at anything except my phone screen. 

We Will Achieve The Thing Together

Narrator: they will not achieve the thing

The reason I got into c-drama in the first place is, after decades of western storytelling tropes, it’s so refreshing to watch a story and have literally no idea what’s going to happen. Even when the story sets things up to happen a certain way according to my learned experience of stories, it just doesn’t play out that way. For example, if you’re watching The Lost Tomb Reboot and you expected the jade-mining sequence to end with a slave uprising, you were as surprised as I was. 

Here Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian promise to do their best to find and suppress the Yin iron. Lan Wangji is going to fail at this, allowing this here piece to fall into the hands of the Wens, because unlike his uncle he's not willing to let his clan die to protect it.  

Wei Wuxian is going to take his not-doing-the-thing several steps further, finding and refining his very own piece of extra-badass Yin iron. Yes, he has reasons for this and a lot of stuff happens along the way, but in terms of your typical quest storyline, it would be as if Frodo figured out how to use the one ring to kick Sauron’s ass, rather than (with help) destroying it. Again: this is why I LIKE c-drama. 

Lan Wangji tries to shut Wei Wuxian out of his quest and Wei Wuxian makes a short but utterly character-defining speech. 

You can’t stop me

I know what’s right. 

And then he says that his Grandmaster Baoshan Sanren was isolated because of the Yin Iron, and he has a responsibility to her. Lan Yi agrees. So...he just kinda quit the Jiang Clan right there, didn’t he? In favor of eventually becoming a wandering cultivator like his Grandmaster and clan uncle (Xiao Xichen), and like his mother. 

He is also going to follow in his father’s footsteps by upsetting his Clan Leader when he falls in love. Gosh, he also, like his parents, will die and leave an orphan to fend for himself. So -- the apple doesn't fall far from the tree I guess.

He doesn't realize the pickle he’s getting himself into, of course. Being Wei Wuxian, he thinks he can balance all of his increasing obligations, but being human, he won’t be able to. 

Pardon Our Entwinement

Lan Yi leaves to catch the spiritual plane, the Yin iron drops, the ward breaks, and Wen Ning appears to download a new software update. The kind that breaks your video driver and photoshops your eyeballs.  

Wen Qing comes nosing around the cave wall, and Jiang Cheng stops by to ask what she’s up to. 

He hopes she’s trying to find his brother, just like he will fail to do for her & her brother one day.  

The boys fall out of the wall together, in a nice example of the “oops I’m accidentally humping you” c-drama romance trope. To keep it censor-friendly, Wei Wuxian is actually on the ground next to Lan Wangji’s right knee but the shot is framed so that at a glance he appears to be in a much cozier position. 

Lan Wangji goes on an expression journey don’t say facial through several “oh shit we’re caught” faces, while Wei Wuxian shows Lan Wangji a few iterations of his oh-face. 

Jiang Cheng wants to know what the fuck they have been getting up to for a day and a night. 

The movie wasn't so hot, it didn't have much of a plot, we fell asleep our goose is cooked our reputation is shot

Wen Qing detects that they were somewhere cold and decides it’s her turn to ask nosy questions. Lan Wangji does the guilty startle thing. 

Fortunately Wei Wuxian doesn’t have that problem.

He turns his answer into a prolonged whine about how cold it was, how lost they were, etc. This annoys Jiang Cheng into dropping it and saying they should head back. 

I’m awesome right? so awesome right?

Wei Wuxian gives Lan Wangji a significant look to show that he’s deploying a rhetorical strategy on purpose to distract his questioner. Lan Wangji super does not know how to do that. 

Flute + Yin Iron = Profit

Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji get to watch as Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen tame the hunk of iron and stick it in the bag of holding. Wei Wuxian pays verrrryyy careful attention to this whole “use a flute to control the Yin iron” lesson. 

Lan Xichen really should reconsider his music-lessons side hustle. Arguably this one doesn’t turn out as badly for him personally as teaching guqin to Jin Guangyao does, but it doesn’t turn out great, either. 

知己啊  - zhi-ji-ah

This mostly-tedious Yin Iron conversation with the elders includes a super-important WangXian moment.

Wei Wuxian calls Lan Wangji his zhiji. This is the same word he will use later in the “what am I to you?” conversation during the Jin night hunt, and the word Lan Xichen will use when saying why Lan Wangji wouldn’t repudiate him during his forced isolation. As always, for the full meaning of this word, @hunxi-guilai​ is brills.

A Wen spy bird shows up, and Lan Wangji really wants to chase it, but Lan Xichen says no. 

This happens a lot, actually. Lan Wangji is not a cool-headed person, despite appearances.  Likewise the boys want to go searching for the Yin Iron and the adults want them to slow their roll. 

Being a teenager is frustrating, particularly with a classic “I didn’t actually listen to you before making a decision” adult like Lan Qiren in charge. 

Lying is my First Class Spiritual Tool

Nie Huasang shows up and has his usual hilariously varied reaction to Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji - an enthusiastic “Wei-Xiong!” followed by a nervous & meek “Lan Er Gongzi” and a bow to Lan Wangji.  

He wants to know what happened and Wei Wuxian once again shows his powers of rhetoric. 

I like to call it my “devil snake.” 

He puts off all of Nie Huaisang’s potential questions by really knowing his questioner well and completely distracting him.  

This time Lan Wangji seems impressed. 

Jelly Jiang Cheng

Young Master Cockblock shows up and lets loose with a display of total naked jealousy. That carving on Wei Wuxian’s bed back in Lotus Pier...is that him and Jiang Cheng? Because damn, this boi is jealous. 

...and so is Lan Wangji, apparently, or at least he’s disappointed to have Wei Wuxian taken away from him like that.  

Yearn Mode Enabled

Club Ruohan’s Foyer

Wen Chao and Xue Yang stand awkwardly in Wen Ruohan’s vestibule talking to the boss through a giant door, because sure, why not. 

This doesn’t bother Xue Yang, who as usual has no fucks to give. Except that today, Wen Ruohan tells him that the budget for his project finally got approved, which lifts his spirits quite a bit. 

His project to single-handedly slaughter an entire clan, and he is super excited about the kickoff meeting. 

Wen Chao is mopey because his brother gets all the good murder assignments and his dad doesn’t appreciate him. Boo fucking hoo. 

Periodic reminder that He Peng looks like this when he’s not playing Wen Chao.

Part 2 coming soon!

Soundtrack: Wake Up, Little Susie by the Everly Brothers

Bonus