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#it's enough to not understand it and even if i do never learn why there's beauty and worth in the intangible and strange <3
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another thing that always struck me about jiang cheng and wei wuxian’s relationship is how little jc actually seems to understand wwx and where he was coming from and this is not just an empathy problem (though that is entirely present, too) but also the lack of effort to truly open up to wei wuxian’s pov and seek it from the source himself.
this is possibly the randomest example i can give but during their chat in the burial mounds, jc comments on the situation with the food and whether crops would even grow in the burial mounds and whether people could even live there and it’s just...even if he’s not sure about wwx spending months in the burial mounds, he KNOWS wwx lived in the streets in his early childhood and nothing gives people the mentality of “survival before all else” than that but jc had either never bothered to learn about wwx’s past before he came to lotus pier in all the years he’d known him or he did know and never bothered to contexualise things so he didn’t have to wonder whether a comfortable lifestyle was truly a valid concern for wwx. here’s the passage if anyone wants to read the exact phrasing:
Jiang Cheng was incredulous. “You’re planting things on a mountain made of corpses? Will anything that grows even be edible?” “Trust me. Anything is edible when you’re hungry enough.” “Do you really plan on settling here for the long-term?” Jiang Cheng asked. “Can people even live in a hellish place like this?” “I lived here for three months before,” Wei Wuxian stated.
now, ik jc’s headspace at the time was focussed on detracting wwx’s resolve to live in the burial mounds but my point is moreso that jc actually did not comprehend who wwx was as a person in the books, ever. he literally never came close. and this isn’t even about the missing information like the golden core transplant or the true circumstances of wwx’s three months disappearance. it’s jiang cheng thinking wwx always wanted to show off, linking his actions to a hero complex, thinking wwx was needlessly arrogant, not understanding why wwx would stick his neck out for the wens. it’s the way jiang cheng rarely, if ever, gave wei wuxian any grace in his reading of his actions–always looking at wei wuxian through a lens that was inherently unfavourable and thereby, never allowed him to truly view wwx for who he is.
in contrast, wei wuxian always understood jiang cheng in a way i don’t think jc knew he did. the way he knew where jc’s cutting words originated from, the way he could read jc’s insecurities, the way he could empathise with his grief and anger, even after everything went to absolute hell between the two. i’m not claiming wei wuxian understood jiang cheng like no other or had some uniquely profound insight into his mindset but there is enough content in the books that makes it clear that wei wuxian saw jiang cheng for the person that he was and gave him more grace (than he deserved, imo) and that this understanding was not at all present in jiang cheng’s perspective of wei wuxian.
which brings me to another observation: jiang cheng may or may not have loved wei wuxian but he sure as hell never respected him. because when you respect someone (and i’d argue there is no real love without respect), you try to get to know the person, try to see their side of things, try to assemble your opinion of them after informing yourself about their life. jiang cheng, for me, never exhibited the interest to go even slightly out of his way and gain a better understanding of wwx. wei wuxian wasn’t someone he wanted to spend that kind of time on – be it because jc had internalised the social hierarchy separating them, had never liked wwx for being better than him in various fields or because he was simply not the kind of person who would be emotionally even a little generous in his relationships. it doesn’t matter.
the point for me is that this give-and-take was never balanced. it was always wei wuxian over-extending his internal resources while jc never realised or refused to. some say their relationship only became worse/toxic after the wen remnants were rescued but the seeds were there since their childhoods. their circumstances exacerbated the issue tenfold, yes, most definitely, but that issue was always present and would blow up their relationship sooner or later, as long as jiang cheng didn’t have substantial growth. jiang cheng continuing to live was worth the sacrifice for wei wuxian (be it from a source of affection, obligation, duty, anything) but staying by wei wuxian’s side after the shift to burial mounds was not worth the trouble for jiang cheng. and yes their personalities have alot to do with their individual decisions in these pressing matters but i’m sure that were it jiang yanli who had taken wei wuxian’s spot, jiang cheng’s actions would be far different but do the switch with jiang cheng, and wei wuxian would still make the same choice. because jiang cheng’s relationship with wei wuxian was undeniably unbalanced to begin with. he never did consider wwx his equal and so, never tried to put in the same effort that wwx did. it’s as simple as that.
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circeyoru · 3 days
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Collection of Overlords _ Epilogue = Requested
[Alastor x Soul Owner of All Overlords!Reader]
Part 1 — Part 1.5 — Part 2 — Part 3 — Part 4 — Part 5 — Part 6 — Part 7 — Part 8 — Part 9  — Part 10 — Part 11 — Part 12 — Part 13 — Part 14 — Part 15 — Part 16 — Epilogue (here)
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Charlie’s face grimanced as she watched Alastor and Husk at your services whenever. Even Angel was comfortable around you now. Her stare shy away the moment your head turned to her direction, even though your eyes were closed, she could feel that she made eye contract with you. You gave her the same soft and gentle smile with a nod, she nodded back but her eyes lips pressed to a tight line. 
She moved when she heard the lift ding to signal its arrival, she got in and pressed her desired floor, looking out as the doors closed at the press of a button. Her eyes met yours as the doors slowly closed like time was slowed or paused, the longest wait of her life was this. You maintained your stared until your attention was called away and Charlie immediately let out a sigh of relief. 
The dear princess steadied herself, she has to do something. She was the one that brought along this hotel, she was the one that brought along all her friends, she was the one that survived that hellish experience with the exterminators. So why was it that the moment you arrived that she felt a change? Saw a change.
She knew she wasn’t enough, that there was more to do as the Princess of Hell. She lacked so much that her people hardly see her as the Princess, the heir to the throne. When she saw your commanding presence in action, she thought she could learn from you. Yet, she found herself unable to get close to you. 
She saw how Alastor was always with you, treating you in a way that was never shown before your arrival. She saw how Husk was more actively attentive without that sharp edge in his tone and words. She saw how Angel was more respectful and mindful of his words and actions, being more open and kinder like a cageless bird. She saw how Vaggie was less angry and tense, even with new guest, also having at least a small smile on her face. She also saw how much more cheerful her father, Lucifer, was after your arrival.
And Niffty was Niffty but more tamed, if one could believe it.
These were all things she wanted to do, things she was aiming to help them change. Granted, she knew it’d take some time to achieve, but that’s what the journey will teach them, that things take time to change. She just can’t understand how you brought along this change in the short amount of time you were here. She saw what you have accomplished without even trying to be impossible. A miracle.
“Dad, you got some time?” Charlie knocked on the door to Lucifer’s workshop, another renovation that you granted to her hotel along with a few other special rooms after your identity was revealed by Lucifer. “Can we talk?”
Charlie flinched as she heard stuff fall and crash behind the door, then she could make out her father stumbling to the door before it opened and Lucifer was standing there with an awkward but excited smile, “Charlie! Of course! Come in, come in.” Lucifer moved to the side to let his daughter enter and closed the door behind her, “Weird that you’re free to chat. Ah, not that I’m not happy or bu- I mean, don’t you usually have some friendship or moral class now?”
“Uh… Well, The Coll- Silver offered for a day off for me since I’ve been working too hard and everyone else agreed. Husk’s teaching everyone to be careful for themselves and others, you know, like lies and tricks?” Charlie felt like she was choking as she admitted that, it was like she was slacking off, like her purpose was being taken from her.
Lucifer sighed, bringing Charlie to sit down at a tea table and sat down himself. With a snap of his fingers, drinks and snacks appeared on the table. He pushed a cup to Charlie before sipping on one himself. His smile dropped as he noticed the obvious frown on her face. “What do you want to talk about?”
“Why are there so many changes after Silver came to the hotel?” Charlie blurted out, Lucifer blinked before getting to respond or given the chance to, Charlie continued, “Not that the changes are bad, but they are the changes I thought I can do it with time. Hell’s my home, this hotel and everyone here is my family and friends, I thought… I thought I can finally pull my weight and help… You know, do my part and be the Princess of Hell.”
“Charlie, you need to understand.” Lucifer got up and went to her, kneeling down so that he was looking up at her, “The throne was never ours.”
The princess gasped. “Then why—”
“We’re only given the title. It means nothing to anyone other than the Sinners.” Lucifer explained, “You never been to the other Rings, but there, you’d be no more than a minor significant figure. We only manage the Sinners, the souls sent to Hell after death, we’re the King and Princess of Sinners. Not of Hell.”
“Then who…”
“Charlie, you’re important to me and I know redemption and this hotel is important to you. But like I told you before, you can’t protect anything without power and authority, you can’t change anything with those as well.” Lucifer got up and opened his six wings, “We’re given this title to protect ourselves, Lilith and I, it never extended to you because you were never there in the beginning when the words were spoken. It was never agreed that our place will be taken over by an heir.”
Charlie got up, feeling like everything was being taken away from her, “So what. Am I nothing now? I can’t amount to anything?”
Lucifer held her hands in his, giving her an encouraging smile, “No. I never mean that. All these changes you’re seeing means potential and interest in rising you to be the next Queen. Teacher doesn’t throw away anyone.” He chuckled, “I had nothing when I came here, Lilith too, but Teach gave us so much. Teach is also giving you so much too. Where this hotel is built, this land was untouched the moment you were born. Until you said to move out, this land is yours.”
Charlie blinked, her heart ached as her eyes pooled up, “Then I’m not being thrown away? I’m not..”
“Never. Everything Teach may be, Teach isn’t pure evil. Otherwise,” Lucifer smiled brightly, “We’d all be dead where we stand.”
Charlie chuckled along, but then froze, “Wait, but then, that means Silver’s the real… Oh my… But you tell me all this, aren’t you in—?!”
Lucifer patted Charlie’s hands, “These are secrets meant for your ears now, Teach said when you ask then I can tell, it was time you knew. Because more challenges will be coming for you in the future.”
.
.
.
“The Princess is ready for her test. For this stage, it’s vital for her to grow. To do that, we need some friction. Between the hotel and the new Overlords.” You turned to the three kneeling Overloards behind you. “The former Vees and Alastor. Your history with each other, Vox and Alastor, would be of great help.”
Alastor, Vox and Velvette all raised their heads as they meet your attention.
“I won’t disappoint, My Sovereign.”
“I’ll do as you command, My Sovereign.”
“Everything will be as you wish, My Liege.”
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Note: Okay. This is really really the final part. Say bye bye to this series everyone. I have no idea if it will continue when Season 2 is up cause of all the changes I did for this series. Thanks for sticking by this story till the end everyone.
Circe Y. 
My Works: MASTERLIST
Taglist: (those that don't specify to being in all the works' taglist will automatically be assumed to be in whichever series they comment on)
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sorensolsikke · 20 hours
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i hate how people don't recognize me as a dragon.
like, they do see me as the dog i am!! at some point, every friend of mine tells me that i am the golden retriever friend!! everyone says my hair looks like cute ears!! they tell me "aww big puppy eyes" and "oooh biig stretch" without a second thought, without knowing my identity, and that's so validating, i love my friends and siblings!!! i am indeed a puppy for them!!
BUT FOR FUCK'S SAKE WHY DON'T I LOOK LIKE A DRAGON TOO?
i constantly question my self-knowledge by this; i think i know myself well enough, but nobody – except my girlfriend – seems to notice certain traits of mine that are the core of my identity. like i am sure i am unpredictable and unrestrianed when i am full of rage, or especially when i am protective of someone. i remember scaring the crap out of people who tried to hurt me or my loved ones when i seemed vulnerable at first glance, but oh i know my voice and claws and i don't fear pain. how can people still only see that i am patient and hard to make angry. they never believe me when i say i am scary and unstoppable when i get mad. and then they shit themselves when i finally do.
i demand being respected like a wild animal.
people also laugh at me when i say i am a good leader when i have to take that role. they know me to startle easily, being rather laid-back and quietly understanding than determined and in control of the situation. they don't even notice that these traits are compatible. they don't even seem to understand that i have been the oldest sibling at the hardest times, when our bare survival was at risk. i've always been, and always gonna be, the pack leader in every given critical situation, and will stand back after the problems are solved. (and i am also a verse/switch. if you know what i mean.)
i want to be recognized as strong and forceful, because i am.
people don't even understand that i am vain and full of pride. they genuienly think i am humble, even tho that's very, very far from me. i did learn how to say a genuine sorry and how to lose a competition. but i am almost pityfully proud, will collect compliments, will make sure to look perfect, always. let's just say, i don't despise flattery. and others still seem like they REFUSE to believe i have bad traits?!? other than, you know, autistically clumsy and sensitive??
i am a DRAGON for fucks SAKE, not a cutesy fucking RABBIT.
i am vain, i'm a horder, i am strong, determined, forceful, calculating, cagey, protective, and feral.
and i don't even get started on how i see myself dragon-like in the mirror, not just where my phantom limbs would be, but also. my canine teeth stand out a lot more than others, because they grew incorretly. my tongue is long (humanwise i mean), and i step on the first half of my feet. there is nothing humble in my posture. how can't they see how can't they how
...in fact there is someone who notices. my girlfriend has seen me as i am, from the very first minute. they didn't create an unrealistic idea of my delicacy. i adore them so much, they are the most insightful person i've ever known, and they still chose me. they are somehow the only one who understands my ferality, and somehow they are also the one who would do everything to stay with me. their existence does ease my rage of being misunderstood... but i can't escape the idea that i learnt masking so well that any controversial trait of mine became invisible. i am afraid that i became something like an animal in a zoo; acting domesticated, but in fact a ticking bomb.
i am a dragon. and i WANT people to notice finally.
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caplanbuckybarnes · 16 hours
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My Pieces Fit You (Jason Todd)
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Summary: Jason learns that you're not leaving him… ever.
Warnings: fluff & angst
WC: 862
Read on Ao3!
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The low hum of the safe house enveloped the two of you as you sat on the worn-out couch, the dim light flickering overhead. Gotham was unusually quiet for once, but even that peace felt fragile—like everything else in Jason Todd's life.
He sat across from you, shoulders tense, his gaze averted. The Red Hood helmet lay discarded on the table between you, a stark reminder of the life he led and the walls he had built.
You watched him, your heart twisting in your chest. There was something in the way he held himself tonight, the quiet way he stared at the floor, that told you he was carrying something heavier than usual. Jason was many things—brash, stubborn, reckless—but vulnerable was not one of them. Not often, at least.
The silence stretched until it became unbearable, and you broke it softly. “Jay… talk to me.”
His jaw tensed at the sound of your voice. He didn’t look up, but you saw his fists tighten, white-knuckled, as though he was battling a storm inside of himself. You knew he didn’t do this—didn’t talk about the things that tore him apart from the inside. But you couldn’t stand the distance, the way he was shutting you out again.
“I don’t need to talk,” he muttered, voice low, barely a grumble.
“Jason,” you said again, this time firmer. You reached out, hesitating for a brief moment before placing your hand gently on his. He flinched at the touch, as though he wasn’t used to it—to the warmth, the comfort. You were always the one person who could get close, but even then, he kept a piece of himself hidden, locked away.
His head snapped up suddenly, eyes burning with a frustration you didn’t understand at first. “I don’t need you to fix me,” he spat, the words coming out harsher than he meant them to. Immediately, guilt flashed across his face, but he couldn’t take the words back.
You didn’t flinch, though his words stung. You’d heard it before—how he didn’t need anyone, how he had survived alone. But the thing was, you weren’t trying to fix him. You just wanted him to see that he didn’t have to carry the weight of the world on his own.
“I know,” you whispered, your voice soft, a contrast to the fire in his. “I’m not trying to fix you. But you don’t have to keep everything locked up. Not with me.”
Jason stared at you, his eyes filled with something that scared him—something raw and real. His defenses were crumbling, and he hated it. He hated that you could see through him, hated that you cared enough to try.
“Why do you keep doing this?” he asked, his voice breaking, low and defeated. “Why do you keep coming back, even when I push you away?”
You smiled sadly, shaking your head. “Because I see you, Jason. The real you. Not just Red Hood, not just some guy trying to save Gotham. You.”
He sucked in a sharp breath, his chest heaving as though the weight of your words had knocked the wind out of him. For the first time, he didn’t look away. He just stared at you, something softening in his eyes.
“Every time I think I’ve got my life figured out,” he muttered, the words coming slowly, as though he was fighting each one, “you… you show up. And suddenly it’s like—” He paused, swallowing hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he searched for the right words. “You’re the missing piece I never knew I needed.”
The confession hung between you, heavy and fragile.
Your heart skipped a beat, the vulnerability in his voice unraveling something inside you. Jason wasn’t one to admit his feelings easily, and this—this was more than you ever expected.
A quiet laugh escaped you, though your eyes glistened with emotion. “You don’t have to be alone in this, Jay,” you whispered, your thumb brushing gently over his knuckles. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Jason let out a shaky breath, his walls finally crumbling. His eyes closed for a moment, and when they opened again, there was something softer, almost broken, in his expression. He reached out slowly, his hand covering yours, as if afraid that if he moved too quickly, you’d disappear.
“I don’t deserve you,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. “Not after everything.”
You shook your head, leaning closer. “That’s not for you to decide.”
For the first time in a long while, Jason allowed himself to believe it—to believe that maybe, just maybe, he didn’t have to do this alone. That maybe you were the one thing he hadn’t known he was missing, the one person who made him feel whole again.
He pulled you close, wrapping his arms around you, his forehead resting against yours. The world outside was still dark and dangerous, full of enemies and battles to be fought. But in this moment, it didn’t matter.
Because in this moment, Jason Todd wasn’t Red Hood, and you weren’t just another person who’d end up walking away.
You were the piece that made him feel like maybe, just maybe, he could find peace.
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Note
any opinions on joker junior!tim/jason?
oh my GOD yes-
Joker Junior!Tim is one of my guilty pleasures. i'm *obsessed* with the concept, i think it's so horrifying in such an intriguing way. it's tricky to work into the main timeline, but that's sort of the fun of it, bc generally you have two routes: Joker Junior happened to Tim when he was Robin and he's since moved on and continued to be Robin then Red Robin. or it happened to him as Red Robin and is a current thing that the characters in the fic are dealing with. and both are good.
because there's endless potential of how to do it with JayTIm. does Jason save Tim, does Jason *know* in the first place, if it happens after Jason is back as Red Hood how does he react, etc. i've read it in fics and i love every version.
but i think i'm intrigued by the idea of Joker Junior happening before Jason comes back as Red Hood and he finds out about it and he's *pissed*. like infinitely more pissed than he would've been. but his anger isn't in protection of Tim, it's at Bruce for not learning, for letting this happen again. and for making a brainwashed child have to kill Joker because *again*, Bruce couldn't do it. the point isn't about if Joker is alive or dead. it's that *Bruce* didn't kill Joker and Jason's death didn't mean enough to Bruce to stop Joker before he did it again. because Joker Junior really is the proof Jason needs to shove in Bruce's face about child sidekicks and Robins and Joker. and since Jason didn't exist in the universe where Joker Junior happened, we never saw a real comparison of the two. but i think if they happened in the same universe, it makes what Joker does to Tim far more purposeful. because now he knows he can kill a Robin and *get away with it*. so he wants to push it. how do you top *killing Robin*? like, if that doesn't get to Batman *what does*? Joker Junior seems like the perfectly reasonable next progression. if a dead Robin doesn't break the Bat, then breaking Robin beyond recognition seems even bigger. and Joker trying to get Tim to kill Bruce as Joker Junior would likely be Joker just seeing if Bruce would let it happen. could Bruce bring himself to stop Tim? and of course Joker doesn't find out bc Tim kills him instead, but it's such a fun question.
and so, i think Jason would *know* his death in a way, caused this. Joker did that to Tim because he didn't get enough of a rise out of Bruce for killing Jason. if Bruce had *just* killed the Joker, none of this would've happened. another kid wouldn't be irrevocably fucked up.
as for Jason's opinions on Tim specifically, i think it's fun if Tim retires from vigilante work entirely after the incident. (with Steph taking over as Robin for a much longer and more significant period instead of just getting fridged) because Tim has very black and white morals so knowing he killed someone, even under the influence of Joker venom, he'd immediately put down the cape, suggest Steph to take up his mantle and quietly retire. he knows what he's capable of now, pushed to the edge and it scares him. i think it's fun if it scares him *because* he was lucid. if he was truly under the brainwashing control, he would've killed Bruce. but he didn't. he had a moment of clarity, and decided to kill the Joker. and he knows that was *him*, not Joker Junior. he made that decision and now, he lives with it.
which means Jason would be almost pissed off by Tim, at first. because they're reacting to their trauma *wildly* differently. Jason wants blood for blood, vengeance, war, and to make Gotham feel his wrath. but Tim just wants to. disappear. quietly vanish and live a quiet life, even refusing to run comms. Jason doesn't understand how TIm doesn't share the anger and passion Jason has for justice. he knows what Tim is capable of and so does Tim, so why doesn't Tim lean into it? why doesn't he take back control? bc this is letting the Joker win, to Jason. after all, Jason is the guy who took Joker's old name to prove a point. and now he's facing another person broken by Joker who just. is a normal guy. i'd love to write Jason forcibly dragging Tim back into the superhero life, trying to trigger the worst out of him and wanting to find kinship in Tim. because that's another part of it- this is someone else who might actually understand Jason's experiences and Jason just wants to not be alone. he wants someone else who gets what it feels like. so he makes Tim face the trauma Tim is running from and pushes and pushes until Tim snaps. i think it could be fun.
don't get me wrong, i love softer JJ!Tim in JayTim stuff just as much, where Jason is more protective and they bond and end up really close and taking care of each other because of it. but i'd love to lean into the fucked up nature of it. for Jason to want to rip Tim open and see just how much of the Joker is left inside of him. for Jason to be obsessed with the other Robin that Joker broke. for Jason to be even angrier at Bruce because of it all. there's endless potential and it will forever remain my guilty pleasure for JayTim.
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spikesbunny · 2 days
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♥︎ HAVE YA SEEN HER? ♥︎
+ warnings: pet names, dehya has a cock, unprotected sex, public sex, vaginal fingering, cowgirl position, intoxicated sex, dehya is an outlaw (sorta ooc, speaks in a western accent), not proof read 'cause i wrote this in tumblr drafts
+ ft: outlaw! lioness dehya x fem reader
+ wc: 2.1k
+ desc: have ya seen her, 5'9", thick and fine? well, actually about 5'6", in her 20s, and a lioness cowgirl?? well, you have! and she walks into the same damn bar as you on your birthday night. so what happens when a town girl meets her ride or die - and takes a ride for the night?
+ notes: this was originally supposed to be the 'cowboy hat rule' , but i decided making it tyrant inspired was much much better (but don't fret, i will write that hat rule <3)
nsfw under the cut... minors + men dni !!
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the small town you called your home always had something going on. rebellious scholars picking fights with locals, nightly bar fights, and of course, the shoot offs. you don't understand how this place even still stands, so much crime went around.
it wasn't like any of the locals cared, you all learned to turn a blind eye. it was better to stay out of trouble with the outlaws, especially the cowboys.
under any normal circumstances, you wouldn't even think about going to the bar. but tonight was different. it just so happened to be your birthday, and candace so lovingly invited you out for a drink or two. just for fun is what she told you.
you find her sitting there, smiling and waving you over. "i'm glad you came, you never really want to come to these little hangouts" the guardian chuckles as you settle down next to her in the cramped booth.
the place reeked of booze, vomit, and sex. all you could think about how this spot practically screamed 'please commit crimes here.'
"i'm surprised you of all people want to come here. isn't you duty over at aaru village the guardian?" you ask, looking over the menu. at least the drinks are cheap...
"we both can fight, can't we? besides, most of the ruckus happens up front. we shouldn't have to worry about this dingy old booth back here."
you smile softly. damn, she really thought this out. "well, cheers then. to another year of me throwing away my life."
your friend shakes her head, her different colored eyes peering at you. "you never give yourself enough credit. nonetheless, i won't lecture you tonight. this rounds on me, okay?" she informs, calling a waitress over to order you a round of shots.
as the night passes on, you loosen up, sharing a few more rounds with candace. honestly, you hadn't even noticed any of the no good criminals walking in and out of the place.
that was, until she came. pretty, long brown hair with amber highlights, pretty dark skin, a muscular build, and... a cowboy hat? oh no, oh no no no, this can't be good.
you try to shake away the thought of her, but there she stood, by the bar, nails resembling cat claws tapping at the counter as she waited for a drink.
damn, she even had a cute pair of lion ears to match. she was the whole package - minus the obvious crime affiliation.
candace takes note of your staring, glancing over. "oh, lord. dehya?? come on..."
"what?" you ask. "she can't be that bad."
"she's an outlaw! a very notorious one, at that. well known for hosting gunfights and starting ruckuses."
"oh, well, maybe i can change her?" you sounded so stupid, you told yourself. you can't change an outlaw, that's insane?? right?? yet why did you want to do it so badly?
"candace, it is my birthday..." you plead, looking at her.
"fine, i have a patrol anyways. stay safe though, okay? call me if you need anything." you nod, thanking her for the time. discreetly, she slides you a pair of handcuffs across the table. pink, fuzzy ones.
your face reddens at the object laid on the table. "candace??" you whisper, looking around, pocketing them into your purse. "seriously???"
"what? she's an outlaw, she's probably into that stuff." she replies, walking off. "now, bye bye, have fun and stay safe, okay?"
you nod, waving bye to her. she was more compliant than i expected... maybe this dehya isn't that bad?
you down another shot, building up the courage to approach her. after all, outlaws like talking, right?? besides, she seems more docile than the others present in the bar.
you rise from your booth, slowly making your way to where the chestnut haired women stands.
the lioness, alert to the sound of your approaching footsteps, turns to face you. "well, hello, darlin'" she purrs, a country drawl. it wasn't native to sumeru city, you could tell, she was definitely part of the western side of the desert. "what brings a pretty gal like you ta me." her tongue swipes across her crimson painted lips, almost like he was licking the air around you.
"well-" you start, a bit nervous now that this gorgeous beast of a woman looms over you. "you seemed like a sweet woman, so i was wondering if you cared to share a drink?"
damn, you were never normally this bold.
"why, of course not. i'd be a damn fool not ta throw one back with a lil' lady like ya."
you nod, letting her guide you to a new booth, more secluded than the previous one.
"so, what are you doing in this small town? i know we draw attention to a lotta outlaws, but you seem a bit... classier? than this old hunk of land."
dehya giggles, shaking her head as she sips her drink. "oh, pretty girl, no town's too small f' me. in fact, your town's quite cute n' quaint. if i didn't have the reputation i do now, i reckon i mightva settled down here." she confess, a genuine smile on her face. it was pretty, how her lips curled.
her grin turned predatory shortly, sharp canines poking out. "but, i can't deny, i love my lifestyle. the freedom, the adrenaline, rush, oh! get's me goin." she purrs, a soft rumble in her chest.
"and what about you, dollface? 's this town really enough f' ya?" she ask, her ice blue eyes meeting yours.
you take a sip of the drink she bought you - a screwdriver, which just so happened to be one of your favorites. "well, i was kinda raised here, so i'm a bit used to the usual quietness, minus all the disturbances local outlaws like to cause." you reply, giggling. "i've never really considered going further than here, ya know?"
dehya nods, understanding. "yea, this place don't seem too bad. but a pretty girl like ya deserves somethin, homier. a nice house, a lovin family, not this shitshow rundown town."
you blush at her words, hearing the genuine meaning of them. god, candace, why'd you even tell me she's a criminal? she seems so sweet...
"anyways, sweetheart," the lioness starts, her eyes roaming your body in the dimly lit bar. "a girl like you got a lucky man?"
"oh, no, no no!" you reply, waving your hands. "i, uhm, i don't swing that way. much more into women."
"ah, so a lady with refined taste? i shoulda guessed by the way ya downed that screwdriver." she winks, a predatory smile crossing her lips.
that wink caused a full array of butterflies in your stomach. you didn't know if it was her, or the alcohol getting to you.
as the night progressed, the two of you continued to discuss simple things, dehya eventually moving to sit next to you in your booth. her body was pressed so close to yours, you could feel the muscles in her biceps and thighs flexing as she crossed her legs, or moved to grab a drink.
subconsciously, you lean into her shoulder, relishing in the scarred skin. her touches on your thighs lingered, and your head slowly moved to rest against her chest.
the two of you sat cuddled up in the booth, alcohol turning your brain fuzzy, the urge to make a move filling every nook and cranny in your mind.
luckily for you, dehya made the move.
as the night dragged on, her lips slowly found their way to your neck, her kisses small and gentle at first, before developing into sloppier, wetter, hungrier ones.
her hands trailed across your thighs, searing her lust and need into your own skin.
you find yourself settling into her lap, your thighs pressing against her much more muscular, sculpted ones. those pretty calloused hands roam your waist, as her lips and fangs find their way to your collarbone.
"sweetheart, i reckon this night's gonna get a bit more rowdier... ya ever rode a cowgirl? or more specifically, a wanted outlaw?"
you shake your head no. this was definitely a first, especially in such a public setting. but with the new position, her hardened cock pressed so deliciously against your cunt, the clothes a sweet friction yet tedious barrier.
dehya takes your hips, slowly guiding you to grind against her. the rhythm started slow, your hips ever so gently rolling into hers as lips collided.
she kissed you softly, before delving into something deeper, and more primal, lips clashing and tongues mingling, hands groping and grabbing at whatever you two could.
the corner was dim, so no one could really see you two, lost in a haze of sudden lust.
the lioness wasted no time, her rough hands moving aside your panties, swiping up your slit and collecting the slick that was pooling.
"goddamn, darlin, ya're already so drenched. didn't know i had that affect on such a cute lil thing." she coos, her calloused thumbpad rubbing circles around your sensitive clit.
you hide your face in her neck, groaning softly as the outlaw leisurely works at you, dipping one finger into your entrance, her thumb still tracing shapes.
"good girl" she purrs roughly into your ear, her cock twitching against her trousers. god, she needed to be inside you now.
dehya slips another finger in, curling them in your velvety walls right against that gooey spot, earning a louder moan from you. her fingers continue their pursuit, trying to draw you to your orgasm.
"you said 's ya birthday, pretty?" she ask, her tail flicking against your leg.
you nod, unable to speak out of fear of moaning loud enough for other bar-goers to hear. her fingers drew lewd, wet sounds from your cunt, and dehya relished in it.
you groan, orgasm approaching, squeezing her fingers. the outlaw takes it as a hint, picking up the pace, her fingers bringing you down from your high.
she kisses your cheek, before licking it, purring into your ear. "think of this as a 'happy birthday gift', would ya?"
her hands go to her belt, undoing it hastily to free her dick from her restraints.
she waste no time, rubbing the head against your slit, earning a hiss from her. "fuck, baby, need to be inside"
"please?" you whine in agreement, moaning messily as her tip bumps your sensitive clit.
dehya nods, positioning herself, slowly sinking into you as you sit on her lap. she bites down gently on your shoulder, her words whispered into your flesh.
"you wanna ride, or want me to take control?"
"you."
she kisses your jaw, sloppily rutting up into you, stretching you out deliciously. the way her cockhead hits that spongey spot has you seeing stars, her lips and hands burning your body as she thrust up into you.
"shit, squeezin' me so good, dollface." she groans, kissing your pulse point.
you prayed no one in the damn bar could see how wrecked you were, after all, how would it look, the goody-two-shoed town girl getting fucked in a bar by a bypassing outlaw? who had many wanted posters?
it was erotic, to say the least.
and she did it so well, always hitting that spot in you, every roll and rock so deliciously enticing. it was the best birthday gift you could get.
you can tell dehya's getting closer, her thrust growing more sporadic and messy.
you can't help but clench around her, practically holding her inside as you cum again tonight, causing a chain reaction of her spilling into your pussy, pretty white ropes filling you up.
she stills her hips, panting softly, fixing your hair out of your bangs.
"well, dollface, why don't we get outta here, hm? i can take ya back to ya place, and, ya know, maybe see where else this night goes?"
you nod, letting dehya readjust your undergarments and skirt while zipping herself back up. she leaves the tab on the table, winking at the waitress as her hand clasp yours.
"wait, ya might need this." she replies, settling her hat over your head.
you blush, unsure of exactly what to do, but follow her out of the bar, guiding you and her home.
and that's when you remember the handcuffs.
maybe you could get her to cuff you up later?
©2024 spikesbunny - please do not repost or translate my works on other media sites ♡
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merwgue · 3 days
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Why Feyre Shouldn't Have Been High Lady of the Night Court (and Why Lucien & Elain Shouldn’t Lead the Day Court Without Putting in the Work)
Alright, let’s get one thing straight: being the High Lady or High Lord of a court isn’t about looking pretty, having magical powers, or being able to swing a sword. It’s not some fantasy crown you can just plop on your head and suddenly you’re ruling a kingdom. No, being a leader is about more than just political power—it’s about knowing the people, their culture, their traditions. It’s about being part of the community, not just ruling it from a fancy chair.
And that’s where we run into a problem with Feyre. I mean, bless her heart, but let’s be real: three months in the Night Court, and boom, she’s High Lady? It’s like showing up to a new job, sitting in a few meetings, and then declaring yourself CEO. Girl, you haven’t even figured out where the coffee machine is yet!
The Night Court has centuries of history, deep-rooted traditions, festivals, and customs that Feyre couldn’t possibly know in just a few months. She was still figuring out the whole “Inner Circle” dynamic and hadn’t really gotten to know the people or the intricacies of the court’s culture. And yet, she’s handed the title of High Lady like it’s a participation trophy. Sure, she may have bonded with Rhys and the gang, but knowing a few people in power isn’t the same as understanding the heart and soul of an entire court.
Leading isn’t just about power and politics—it’s about making people feel seen and heard. It’s about knowing what makes them tick, what they value, and how they celebrate. How can you guide people if you don’t even understand what they’re all about? How do you unite a court when you don’t know what unites them? Leadership isn’t just about making decisions; it’s about connecting with the people you’re leading. And let’s be real, if you don’t know the culture, you’re going to end up making some pretty awkward blunders along the way.
Now, let’s talk about Lucien and Elain, because if they become High Lord and High Lady of the Day Court without putting in some serious time there, I’m holding them to the same standard. I love Lucien, don’t get me wrong—he’s my cutey patootie—but leading a court isn’t just about showing up and throwing your weight around. Lucien hasn’t been a part of the Day Court as an adult, and Elain… well, let’s just say her resume in court politics is a little thin.
If Lucien and Elain waltz into the Day Court and start calling the shots without first understanding the history, the culture, and the people, it’s going to be a disaster. They need to spend some serious time under Helion’s wing, learning about the traditions and festivals, understanding what makes the Day Court tick. Otherwise, they’re just going to look like tourists trying to lead a country they don’t understand. It’s like trying to host a party in a house you’ve never been in before—you’re bound to knock over a few vases and spill some drinks.
And don’t even get me started on the whole "High Lady of the Night Court" situation again. Leading isn’t just about making political decisions or winning battles. It’s about fostering a sense of community. It’s about celebrating the court’s culture and traditions, making sure people feel united. If you don’t even know what those traditions are, how can you possibly lead? Feyre got the title before she had the chance to immerse herself in the Night Court’s customs, and that’s a problem. Imagine if she accidentally trampled over centuries-old traditions because she didn’t know any better? Awkward.
At the end of the day, leadership is earned, not handed out like candy at a parade. Feyre, Lucien, Elain—they all need to put in the time to really know the courts they’re leading. It’s not enough to just have power. You have to understand the people, the culture, the history. Otherwise, you’re just a figurehead with no real connection to the court. And let’s be real, nobody wants that.
So, no shade to my guy Lucien, but if he and Elain take the reins of the Day Court, they better put in some work. And Feyre? Well, maybe next time she could spend a few years learning the ropes before jumping straight to the top. It’s not like we’re in a rush or anything, right?
Ty @ae-neon for letting me take inspo of your idea💞❤️
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bad-as-me · 1 day
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Morgott for the ask meme!
hell yes my boy!!
favorite thing about them
Honestly, Morgott covers the bases for a lot of things I'm weak for in a character. I love a guy who is so single-mindedly devoted to a cause, especially one driven by a need to be loved, that the rest of the world and their own well-being falls apart in the process. Something about the inherent tragedy of someone choosing to die on a hill that nobody asked them to take on, that would really be in their better interest to let go of and start anew elsewhere, and yet you want so badly for their efforts to be rewarded in some way because you know it's all for love.
It's just so terribly romantic in a gothic sense. He reminds me so much of the description of the creature in Frankenstein: someone that tried so hard to fit himself into the image of what his maker wanted, who speaks beautifully and eloquently in contrast to his rough exterior, who boasts an intelligence and a competency that was likely learned while hidden from society. And yet we know in both situations that effort will never be reciprocated.
Also, he growls and purrs and has a giant fluffy snow leopard tail. How can I not be obsessed with him.
least favorite thing about them
His big beautiful horns are so hard to draw :'(
Honestly, he's one of those characters where even his flaws are incredibly interesting to me. I like that he refuses to give up his position of power! It's something he worked so hard for, and to his mind must be the only way he can stay safe in a world that he knows wants him dead. I like that he can't let go of the status quo! As his Great Rune tells us, Omen or not he is the rightful Lord of Leyndell. By all standards of the world they're in, he has every right to be proud of that title. And given the alternatives he's likely had presented to him (Rykard, Mohg, the Frenzied Flame), why wouldn't he believe that this stagnant existence is the best he could ask for?
He's the immovable object to our unstoppable force. There's a nobility in his commitment to that, however misguided it may be.
favorite line
"We are all forsaken. None may claim the title of Elden Lord. Thy deeds shall be met with failure, just as I..."
I love his monologue in the beginning of his fight, but the fact that this is the last thing he says just tears me apart on so many levels. It really hammers home how much of his targeted spite towards us is him projecting his own sense of failure to his lineage. He crawled all this way through the mud, gave every drop of his accursed blood for the Erdtree, and it still wasn't enough. How could we possibly have a chance when all his efforts were for naught?
No matter how many times I replay it, I always take some time just to sit next to him after he says that, listening to the rain over the capitol and the somber song of Leyndell. The city really feels like it's in mourning at that moment, all for someone they hated too much to truly understand.
brOTP
Mohg and Morgott!!! The gruesome twosome!! The dynamic duo! Every piece of art or fic that depicts them having some brotherly squabbles and shenanigans brings a little bit of life back into my eyes :')
OTP
As far as canon characters go, it's gotta be Morgott/Oleg. We love a good knight/master ship around these parts, and I think he deserved someone as devoted to protecting him as he was devoted to his cause.
Outside of that, well. I am writing an ongoing fic of Morgott and my Night's Cavalry Tarnished (who was never a Tarnished but a secret third option, but you know.) I think about them a normal amount.
nOTP
Mohg/Morgott. I just want them to have one single family relationship in their life that is remotely healthy man 😭
random headcanon
He's good with animals, and prefers the company of them to people. Most of his communication to the Night's Cavalry is through carrier falcon, but if he needs to summon them all for a meeting, he can do so with an instrument that's very similar to an Aztec death whistle.
Also, he recanted his blood through the Church of Vows. Him and Miriel have a good rapport with one another.
unpopular opinion
Respectfully, I disagree with both the "Morgott is basically the Lands Between's evangelical gay republican" take, as well as the "Morgott is a soggy baby virgin who will cry if you give him a cookie" take.
I think he is a living contradiction in a lot of ways. He is simultaneously an accursed Omen, the lowest of the low, while also having tangible evidence that he is the child of a god and of a powerful bloodline. He has held Leyndell together for more than long enough both to be aware of its corruption, and to be in a position to change it, but he can't allow himself to believe any of it needs to be changed.
He is too stuck on the idea that he needs to uphold the way things are - to prove himself "better" than his curse - to change anything. This is directly contrasting his brother Mohg, who has made an entire cult around acknowledging the unjust suffering he went through.
Like the sealing of his blood into a sword, he represses that truth, until he is so broken down that it is released all at once - painfully and without control.
Because of this, I think he would recoil at the idea of being an object of pity. He has done too much to earn a respectable position for anyone to tell him that he deserves better - even if it's true, and he should be told that.
song i associate with them
Oh god I have a whole playlist of them. But if I were to narrow it down:
Sonne by Rammstein
Momma Sed by Puscifer
Romans 10:9 by The Mountain Goats
Helvegen by Wardruna
favorite picture of them
I am not exaggerating when I say this illustration by tendermiasma re-wired my brain on a fundamental level
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thenightisland · 2 days
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in various conversations with my doctor about the insane life changing effect adhd meds have had on me one of the things he said was that it's not uncommon for people who have dysthymia/pervasive depressive disorder to have undiagnosed adhd at the root of the problem. and i think we forget that like. major depressive disorder is supposed to be something that eventually stops. it's episodic. like even people with depression very often are not in a state where it's just like. every day is a misery virtually nonstop for 15+ years. but with dysthymia/pdd it very much so is. which you can have pdd and mdd both at the same time too which is evil but anyway. it is wild enough conceptualizing that there is in fact a difference between the two things bc i very much so got depressed around age ten and just. never stopped. and when you live like that for the bulk of your life you just sort of get used to it? like it sucks but you just assume a degree of that is normal. so even on several antidepressants i never once aimed for "not depressed" i was always aiming for "mildly less miserable" i had just accepted that i would always be a degree of miserable and that my default was going to be feeling bad and if i was very lucky there might be a few days where i felt a little less bad now and then. the goal was "bearable misery" which is nuts to type out like wow! bleak!
anyway something i noticed when they started me on the adhd meds was that all the Racket in my head just. stopped. for weeks i just said to people "it's so quiet in there" because i didn't have dozens of loud competing fast thoughts all the time. and it took a while to pin down why this effect made me less depressed and worked better than literally any antidepressant had. and it's bc it /stopped thoughts/ and when i was depressed the Thoughts did not stop and they were not pleasant ones so i'd get stuck in these awful mental doom spirals and nothing i did would make it stop. and then this medicine made it stop. and it turns out it's much easier to not be sad when your brain doesn't have the Sad Channel turned up to high volume and is forcing you to deal with it clockwork-orange style. bc historically it was like oh god do we really have to do this again do we have to listen to the you will always be alone and unloved and nothing you do will ever be enough and your life will never be fulfilling in any way spiral again?? do we really have to i'm so tired. but now that channel is muted. a lot of channels have been muted. no amount of cbt/dbt techniques or various other therapy tactics had ever managed to mute those channels before.
and it's just insane it's like the thing about how stunned people with chronic pain are to learn that the normal amount of pain for someone to experience on an average day is none. it's just that but emotionally. bc even with the challenges i still have for autism reasons, most days now i'm fine. the emotional pain is zero on an average day. i now understand what people mean when they say "i'm having a bad day" bc there's a difference. but you see. all my days used to be bad. all of them. even the "good" days involved a degree of visceral emotional suffering and dread. and you don't realize how pervasive the bad is until the bad is the exception and not just an ordinary day.
i do not sit around consumed by the same thought patterns and doom spirals and mental quicksand now i'm just going about my day like an ordinary person and it's amazing how much less life /hurts/ and that's the only way i can think to put it is that every day used to hurt and it doesn't hurt now. past-me was incapable of conceptualizing a life where my baseline wasn't "profoundly and painfully sad and aching at all times" i was 100% prepared to just live like that forever!!!! and now if i have a bad day that's all it is an outlier i thought people in movies were just doing a bit when they had a "bad day" and the solution was just have a big piece of cake and cry a little and go to bed early and you'll feel better tomorrow bc i never felt better tomorrow! now i just feel better tomorrow if i have a bad day! most days the emotional pain scale is a 0/10.
like this is so long already but those of you who have been around for a long time you know how nuts this is for me. and i'm a firm believer in everything happens for a reason even bad things and for a few years i've been like huh wonder what the reason is for the whole getting beaten in the head thing though. well. it exacerbated the working memory issues. and it got on my goddamn nerves. so i asked to try this medicine so i could remember to get my soup out of the microwave. and then it fixed all the problems that have plagued me since i was a small child. and now i'm able to conceptualize a day to day life that isn't just Hurting all the time when i once thought i would never do anything but hurt.
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hughungrybear · 3 days
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"I used to value the past because I've never lived in the moment. But now that I do, the past doesn't matter as much......"
Except, the scar on Jiang Tian's nape continues to remind him of the past —
Of the heavy cigarette smoke wafting into the room, which stung his tired innocent eyes, but did nothing to hide the entangled body of Ji Huanyu with another man.
Of how his sudden appearance was enough to startle Huanyu, accidentally tossing a yet-to-be-extiguished cigarette ember, which left an indelible scar on the back of his neck.
Tian hated their kind. In his young mind, all of them are the same. COWARDLY. DESPICABLE. SCUM.
For years, Tian suffered nightmares. He cannot even bear any sort of touch, least of all, from a man. All he can remember is that cigarette smoke and the utter feeling of revulsion. The boy would rather sleep on the cold floor rather than share the tiny, small bed in Old Man Ding's house.
The six-year-old Tian would have continued to live in unadulterated hatred if he didn't chance upon meeting Zhao Xi while reading alone in Old Man Ding's yard.
Zhao Xi used to tease the gloomy child. He would drag Lin Beiting with him to read a couple of lines from the child's book. Sometimes, Xi would even show off by explaining the meaning of hard-to-understand words.
So, imagine Tian's shock and pure disgust when he accidentally learned that the kind friends he managed to find are one of them.
It took Tian almost two years of self-reflection before coming to a clear conclusion: THEM IS NOT NECESSARILY THE SAME AS HUANYU. Both Xi and Lin were kind, honest, and brave - all the things that Huanyu is not.
Tian finally felt no urge to lash out. He made friends with people in various degrees of closeness. He learnt that not all intimacies represent a certain feeling. Furthermore, not one of his new-found friends caused any absurd thoughts to manifest in his mind. Not back then, anyway.
Thus, Huanyu coming back after so many years in an attempt to 'repair' their familial ties is more than an insult.
How dare Huanyu demand acceptance and forgiveness for sins that he have yet to confess out loud?
"You probably think I'm a scumbag. I understand why you never let your mum know, you don't want her to know that she wasted more than 10 years on a dog, right?
It doesn't matter whether you believe me or not, but I did love Ou! I did! Only, dating isn't the same as marriage.
There were many issues and I think the stress got into my head - that's right! I must had some crazy thoughts in my head to do what I did. That's why......"
"That's why you were messing around with that man in our old house? I think YOU are disgusting."
"Xiao-Tian, do you know? Some things......can be inherited."
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puppyeared · 4 months
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i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you
#im reading that post that says artists are directors of audience reaction and not its dictator:#'you cannot guarantee that everyone viewing your work will react as you are trying t make them react. a good artist knows that this is what#allows work to breath. by definition you cannot have art where the viewer brings nothing to the table ... this is why you have to let go of#the urge to plainly state in text exactly how you think the work should be interpreted ... its better to be misinterpreted sometimes than#to talk down to your audience. you wont even gain any control that way; people will still develop their opinions no matter what you do#im thinking abt this again cuz i was thinking maybe the thing that lets adventure time work so well the way it does is cuz it doesnt#take itself too seriously that it gives the audience enough room to fuck with subtext and then fuck with them back yknow. i think it was#mentioned somewhere that they werent even planning to run with the postapocalyptic elements that are hinted in the show but changed their#mind after the one off with the frozen businessmen and dominoed into marcy and simons backstory. on the other side there are stories that#explain too much to let the story speak for itself and i think it ends up having to do more with the crew trying to lead ppl in a certain#direction than expand on what they have and i see a lot of this with miraculous. like when interviews and tweets are used as word of god in#arguments and it becomes a little stifling to play around with it knowing the creator can just interject. u can say its the crews effort to#engage with its audience but it feels more like micromanaging. and none of this is to say there ISNT room for stories that spell things out#theyre just suited for different things. if sesame street tried abstract approaches to themes and nuance itd be counterproductive#a lot of things fly over my head so i need help picking things apart to get it- but it doesnt have to be from the story itself. ive picked#picked up or built on my own interpretations listening to other ppl share their thoughts which creates conversation around the same thing#sometimes stories will spell things out for you without being so obvious abt it that it feels like its woven into the text. my fav example#for this might be ATLA using younger characters as its main cast but instead of feeling like its dumbed down for kids to understand why war#is bad its framed from a childs point of view so younger audiences can pick up on it by relating to the characters. maybe an 8 year old#wont get how geopolitics works but at least they get 'hey the world is a little more complicated than everyone vs. fire nation'. same for#steven universe bc its like theyre trying to describe and put feelings into words that kids might not have so they have smth to start with#especially with the metaphors around relationships bc even if it looks unfamiliar as a kid now maybe the hope is for it to be smth you can#look back to. thats why it feels like these shows grew up with me.. instead of saving difficult topics for 'when im ready for it'#as if its preparing me for high school it gave me smth to turn in my hands and revisit again and again as i grow. stories that never#treated u as dumb all along. just someone who could learn and come back to it as many times as u need to. i loved SU for the longest time#but i felt guilty for enjoying it hearing the way ppl bash it. bc i was a kid and thought other ppl understood it better than me and made#feel bad for leaning into the message of paying forward kindness and not questioning why steven didnt punish the diamonds or hold them#accountable. but im rewatching it now and going oh. i still love this show and what it was trying to teach me#yapping#diary
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the-woman-upstairs · 4 months
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It’s just…so painful to watch Armand readily submit in order to obtain the love he so desperately craves. And while it’s most assuredly a manipulative tactic, it’s still one borne out of fear and desperation. He cannot lose this person he’s come to love and so will become whatever they want, do whatever they want just so they’ll stay with him. But it won’t be enough. No matter how much he acquiesces or seeks to control (himself, others, the environment), he won’t be able to make Louis stay with him in the perfect life, perfect self he built in the hopes of finally being loved. It will all crumble with Armand left alone in the rubble of what he created, the author of his own abandonment.
#this unfortunately hits way too close to home for me#let’s not even get into Claudia’s anger at never being enough#iwtv spoilers#interview with the vampire#armand#this is just me speaking from personal experience…but there is definite manipulation at play here from Armand#and I don’t necessarily mean that pejoratively- when you’re desperate for people to like/love you you’ll become whatever they want#or whatever you think they’d want and you give it to them so they’ll want to keep you around#I’ve done it so often with the people in my life- and make no mistake it’s also a survival tactic#you give someone what they want they won’t hurt you#and when that’s how you survive for years and years it becomes the default method of interacting with others#even with normal people who genuinely mean you no harm you revert to that people pleasing mode#as a means of control both external and internal#this is what i see armand doing- his way of surviving that he’s never truly broken out of#armand ceding coven control to Louis and curating the Dubai penthouse for Louis are part of the same pattern of behavior#and even tho it’s ultimately harmful and will only end badly for armand and Louis’ relationship#idk if armand knows how to not exist that way with someone he loves/desires#all of this also ties into louis and daniel#because of course Armand will lose it over Louis finding connection and interest with someone else aside from him#someone HUMAN no less#and I can see Armand taking out his anger on Daniel as a way of expressing his own frustration at still not being enough for Louis#breaking daniel’s mind in a desperate attempt to understand why this human could reach Louis in ways he couldn’t#not saying any of this to excuse Armand and his behavior obviously (I’m very upset and worried over the trial looming on the horizon)#but I do understand this impulse and how you’ll throw ANYONE under the bus in order to preserve your place with loved ones#it’s all horrifying but unfortunately I empathize#like even if Louis is right to walk out on him when he learns/remembers the truth of what happened to Claudia#I’ll probably still find myself saddened by Armand’s fate because I’ve absolutely been there myself#it’s a tragedy of his own making- his fear and desperation birthing manipulative and controlling behaviors#that ultimately result in your own abandonment#god this fucking show
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Dysprosium, Mary Soon Lee
dysprosium, AN 66, is a silvery-white rare earth metal. its name is derived from the greek dysprositos, meaning “hard to get at”, owing to the difficulty in separating and isolating this rare earth element. dysprosium is used to measure neutron flux, to fuel reactors, and to activate phosphors. terfenol-d is a magnetorestrictive alloy, meaning that it changes shape when a magnetic field is applied, and is used to manufacture underwater acoustic systems.
jason “robo” robertson, dallas stars #21 for @simmyfrobby’s nhl periodic table poems <3
#i had a couple different ideas for poems that were taken by the time i could go deranged for a couple hours to make this but as I looked#i was like WAIT NONE OF YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE JASON ROBERTSON YOU HAVEN’T SEEN MY TEXAS CAM and had to do it. also was STRUCK with the#sudden immaculate vision of the Dallas D as part of terfenol-D and could not get it out & robo is the most dance! person i know on the team#liv in the replies#dallas stars#jason robertson#nhl periodic table poems#guys i am plagued with visions and no execution skills!! every day i come here and learn one new skill on GIMP the way god intended!!!#today it was emboss. also cannot claim any credit for the pulse to the magnetic beat photo which is so cool that was one where i had a#couple and was like maybe i can do like crayon shockwaves like the art process video kasper showed? and then found that picture and was#like thank you lord stanley for knowing my limitations. thank you for your understanding in this moment it was a trial enough to make#expand contract dance and one would THINK i would have fucking learned from the claude animorphs tragedy!! i did not. but i did use the#shear tool and 3D rotate so at least if we’re animorphing it’s SLIGHTLY better. anyway me frantically doing this like WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT#WAIT FOR ME YOU GUYS ARE SO FAST i keep seeing all of these and just spinning around in circles until i get dizzy & fall down I’m so happy#the drive folder for this is just called joy!!!!! because joy this is such a cool idea but now because it brings me so much joy#i just saw the Travis dermott one and burst into tears super normal AND someone did exactly what i wanted with hydrogen which was the water#the ice!!!!! it’s so perfect!!! and cody ofc did silver lord stanley. like does it ever make you cry how beautiful & creative everyone is?#anyway if you see me post and delete this and then update it or change it no you didn’t it’s fine. but i wanted to be included#if i could make the dysprosium letters not have a white background i would I simply could not fuck with it at 1AM. we are hitting send#it may not look like it but i queue#pretend i spoke at length about the reasons why i picked all the pictures & the element just know that it’s there inside my brain u can ask#GUYS I TAKE IT ALL BACK I SAW NEONFRETRA’S ISOTOPES AND I COULD MAKE THE EDITS EVEN THOUGH THEY’RE THERE!! ISOTOPES!!!! YOU GUYS!!!!!!#get ready for the edits then. dylan magnesium my beloved child of stars who can never return… like i wish i could say anyone else but it’s#i KNOW number nineteens bismuth don’t make me Google how many years nolan played hockey but also there’s ej for stable so.. also half-life#actinium claude giroux my beloved… when i saw there already was a claude i thought maybe Brady too for that#I don’t know how but flerovium doubled magic is percolating in my brain as was promethium bad boy because I was like hmmm. tyler. but#couldn’t commit and THEN SOMEONE DID BAD BAD LEROY BROWN TYLER BERTUZZI TO PROMETHIUM AND BESTIE I AM KISSING YOU ON THE MOUTH!!! with cons#anyway shane wright germanium with juraj slafkovský but showing him very obviously not missing it. if jack eichel was not an asshole#the narratives WOULD be narrativing. you could argue for a sidovi here with the calder cup and potentially a best friend stealing narrative#(the most recent is cam yorke’s acquisition of jamie d from trevor zegras which would then require a yorkie one for silicon the other side)
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srldesigns6277 · 5 months
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#personal#sometimes i wish i knew what it was like to be someone people want to talk to#or at least had students who could listen to what i say for just five minutes#god i hate yelling then they say thats all i do when if i talked normally no one fucking listens#then i take it way too hard when they say they dont like me when at least i stepped up to take their class#a class that had already ran off one teacher#but no im too useless because i actually make them do work and tried to have rules#last year was hard but at least i felt fulfilled by the end of the year with all my classes#i have never craved the end of the year so much or as much as i have this year#its not even both classes either its just this one that makes me dread working with them as much as they apparently hate me#sadly i can understand why their teacher left#and i know im not the best replacement since im learning how to teach them as they learn from me#but im just tired#its only a month left but i am so ready to never see any of them again#but depression does as it does and makes me question if im even good enough to get another job#one actually teaching my correct subject that i love#i hope like hell that i get a job and one i really want because i dont want to have to come back to this school#*it has the most substitute jobs#i dont like being loud even if no one believes me i dont like being mean though i know when i have too i just dont feel good enough#if i was i think i would have a job by now i mean im 28 and its been 5 schools in 5 years#sorry being sad on main#if you read this#thanks
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mixtapedoh · 13 days
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just heard someone say "if someone tells me they love me and they see value in me, i don't have to understand where they're coming from, it's enough for them to perceive me that way." feeling emotional in this chili's rn.
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reaveh · 13 days
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This is gonna sound so dumb and nobody will even see this lol but like !!! I wish people could just tell me they don’t like me or like explain why they don’t like me
#I really don’t understand what I’m doing wrong like the words I use are they weird ? are my interests weird ? do I just not talk about cool#enough things ? or do I have an annoying way of thinking ?#I don’t even know how to make friends anymore#everyone is so terrifying just because every time I try to make friends or even when people (rarely) approach me first#they don’t seem as invested as I am#and even the ones who (rarely) approach me first are so mean bc it almost feels so gaslighty#like I just thought if you go up to someone and tell them you think they’re cute or cool wouldn’t you want to be their friend ?#I don’t understand#like wouldn’t you the one who tried hard to be said persons friend why would you pull away or just keep such a faraway distance between you#guys … I’m so confused#at least now I don’t need to worry about bothering people on the dash bc nobody even cared abt what I had to say anyways#granted tumblr and lots of people I’ve met here are part of this problem#to be honest one reason I think I’m not fun to be around on this app as other ppl and that my connections aren’t#as meaningful is mostly because I don’t engage with smut topics and stuff#and that makes me sad because I can’t change that about myself I’m literally aroace#and I hate it when people would try to force me into a sexuality and I hate it when marriage is brought up#and I hate it when ykw topics are brought up and I hate it when someone shoves their relationships down my throat#but why is all everyone seems to like is about those things#I wish people could like me even tho I don’t talk about smut and stuff#or like me just as much as they do their friends who do talk about those things#and then people ask me why I hate sm about my identity#I hate that I’m aroace I hate that because of how I’ve been treated for so long I’ve developed crippling social anxiety#I hate where I’m from. I’m embarrassed at times from the fact I’m Muslim too#all of these were learned hatred because I never hated those things before
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