#it's been two weeks and three days
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#wake up this morning and my friend is still gone. just gone.#it's been two weeks and three days#one post from their queue. nothing else from them#hundreds of messages left unread and will stay unread#it's so surreal to wake up and have no notifs from them texting while i was asleep#it's so surreal to wake up and know that even if i texted now he won't reply#it's so empty#i miss them so much and it's so sick that everything is just... continuing without them#i miss you jonesy and i hope you're so much happier wherever you are#vent
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dragon dance
#fire emblem#fe7#blazing sword#nils#ninian#aquanutart#i saw someone post a pic of ninian and say it was the fire emblem anniversary#and i thought i should put up an old pic i haven't posted for that and i was going to try to rush to do it#then i realized the anniversary was last week. so it didn't matter#and i spent four hours shuffling and reshuffling my pokemon card deck playing an imaginary game against myself#it works really well when i'm not playing anyone else and imagine everything going exactly the way that i want#then i go to an event where i have an actual opponent and it goes differently#i've heard it recommended to build the opponent's deck and play it against yourself#but i don't want to buy all the cards for another deck and also don't want to print proxies because it would take a lot of time and ink#so what i do when i'm missing a card is i put another card in its place and imagine it's that card#'so this n's klinklang is a dragapult and these little wooloo are dreepies'#it works if i'm missing two or three cards but i think if i tried to play a whole deck like this it'd be incredibly confusing#i am always really relieved when i actually get the card i need and can stop pretending#(i don't play dragapult; that was just an example. if i did i probably wouldn't keep losing but i never had a dragapult so i don't)#anyway i made this like 1-2 years ago? i don't even remember.. for a theme on twitter#i think the theme was 'music'#i love these dragon kids#anyway happy anniversary fire emblem 7 !!!! i love this game so much#i just realized the anniversary for fe7 rather than the whole series anniversary was actually only 3 days ago and i could have been on time#it's... fine. i am going to pretend it's 3 days ago in exactly the way i pretend i am winning when i play pokemon against myself
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and you may say to yourself: "my god! what have i done?" and you may tell yourself: "this is not my beautiful wife!" and you may tell yourself: "this is not my beautiful house!" and you may ask yourself: "well, how did i get here?"
time isn't holding up, time isn't after us, time is a pony ride! (images described in alt text)
#gravity falls#fiddleford mcgucket#LETTING THE [FIDDLEFORD FRI]DAYS GO BY#“sir it's tuesday” i know. my computer has been busted for two weeks so i couldn't post them when i wanted to. just let me have this#again still new to alt text. i like being a little bit silly but let me know if it gets in the way of accessibility#artwork of the damned#uhhhh yeah this is actually something ive kind of wanted to draw for years now#favorite guy + favorite band = prime high-effort meme material#also. for the record. yes i have a mcgucket playlist. yes it has three talking heads songs on it. no none of them are “once in a lifetime”#also also i know that the lyrics in the description are in the wrong order. it's on purpose. i put them backwards for dramatic effect#also also also i'm pretty sure the “time is a pony ride” line is not actually sung on the album version of the track#but if you listen to/watch the live version from “stop making sense” you will hear it!#as well as hear a much more satisfying ending to the song imo. rather than it just fading out it has some really nice vocals#basically the moral of this story is you should watch “stop making sense”#if you made it to the end of the tags: congrats! you win a prize! the prize is permission to reblog this post
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two characters cuddling on the couch watching TV. despite the calmness of their surroundings, the show playing on the screen like normal as if nothing were wrong, they're both tense as brick walls. one is sick as a dog, wrapped in blankets, waiting for it to be over, and the other is worried out of their mind about how high that fever keeps getting, ready to load into the car and book it to the nearest hospital at the drop of a hat if need be. the tension only fades when the shivers of the ill one slowly die off, indicating the fever breaking after a hard battle won, the sickness finally leaving them so they can rest properly
#brother help me i am still fucking sick <- has only been sick for two to three days and is aware it lasts like a week#whump#whump trope#illness#fever#worry#cuddling#blankets#~my stuff~
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You’re not into doing art anymore are you? :-/
Homie my dog died last week and I’ve literally been bedridden since then with a really bad cold. Cut me some slack 😭
#Pretty bad two weeks honestly if must say so#I’m STILL sick btw. It’s been a solid seven days now at this point#I’m over it. I’m done being sick I want to feel like a human being again#Also I’ve had the world’s worst art block for like three months. You gotta be patient with me I just need time#ESPECIALLY right now#I’m going to try and get to my tablet this weekend if I can. Hopefully I’ll start feeling better by then#Shima answers questions#Anyway to answer your question: Yes and no. Just be patient with me 🙏 Ya girl’s gotta recover mentally AND physically rn
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Weird thing to say
#Thing I've had in my drafts for two weeks#Brakul's favorite food is crab. It used to be crayfish but he lived far inland with no access to the greater beasts of their ilk#that dwell in the seas and quickly converted upon reaching the coasts.#I made a version of crab soup he's canonically established as cooking sometimes and have been eating it for the past three days#Legit really good actually#janeys haidamane#brakul red dog
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socmed au is back ! introducing darry’s thumb infamous thumbs up
#this is part uh#part 1.5#(ik how to count)#i can’t be bothered to tag it properly but later trust#the outsiders#the outsiders musical#johnny was totally lying when he said he hadn’t eaten in three days#it’s actually been five#partly bc he forgot to eat partly bc he didn’t wanna bother darry#darry curtis#ponyboy curtis#johnny cade#two-bit mathews#the outsiders ace#steve randle#steve and ace believe spaghetti is a main#everyone else knows it’s a side#(what steve doesn’t realize is that they’ll be eating spaghetti for the next week#johnnys excited bc spaghetti is his favorite bc it’s just as good cold as it is hot)
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HMMNGGGSHSHHSHD IM SO LATE TO THIS BUT THERES SO MANY THINGS IVE WANTED TO SAY FOR SO LONG AND IVE JUST BEEN TOO DEPRESSED OR BUSY TO DO IT
I did just re-read the chapter, hazbin/helluva hyperfixation is gone y’all I’m back and ready for more.
Okay so, a couple of things I noticed. Let’s start there.

Throughout this chapter, it really is heartbreaking to see how Izuku regards one for all as Allmight’s power, and therefore a disrespect to him to give that away. Which is quite frankly insane given the nature of what the power is, but regardless it still shows me just how deeply he still cares for and admires allmight.
It also makes the transfer Izuku makes to Katsuki in the heroes rising movie all the more intimate; izuku wouldn’t just give the power to anyone, if not for himself (which is also clearly due to that fact since he still sees ofa as the thing that makes him a hero, not his characteristics), then simply out of respect for allmight and his legacy.
It’s just the anger you can see, feel in those words as he demands to know why. I’ve personally been in the boat of “Izuku dislikes Kudou immensely bc he hasn’t proven to be heroic and amazing like Katsuki has, and also he insults him a lot why would he like him”, since Izuku does genuinely have self respect (a common mischaracterization imo), he’s just also more forgiving and faithful to those he admires or loves (or both).
SPEAKING OF SELF RESPECT AND MISCHARACTERIZATION!

I want to highlight the words “But even so, this boy refuses to throw in the towel”, bc it’s such an important part of Izuku and his character.
He isn’t overly self sacrificial, he isn’t a masochist, he isn’t even a martyr—especially not a martyr.
Izuku is stubborn. That is not the same thing as wanting to constantly die for others; izuku is like Katsuki, he wants to fight for others. Giving up just simply isn’t in his morality.
And if “giving up” also includes letting someone die or failing to save someone out of his own negligence, that’s not because he wants to die.
I can’t explain how much the interpretation that Izuku wanting to die, even for others, is so fucking out of character. Izuku is stubborn, he’s stubborn in the way that he won’t just fall over and let the ground take him. Given the circumstances, Izuku would fight for his life just as he would fight for another.
THIS HAS BEEN THE CASE SINCE, I DONT KNOW, CHAPTER FUCKING ONE?

“Idiot! If I’d really jumped, you’d be charged with bullying me into suicide!! Think before you speak!!”
“Idiot…”
Like he’s so unaffected by the awful comment outside of being angry at the DISRESPECT of said comment. This is why all those damn suicidal Izuku fics have always felt so ooc. Izuku isnt a moody, brooding ball of depression, he’s a stubborn, courageous, and angry ball of depression. There is a difference.
Even before this, he literally attempts to say something or fight back to Katsuki, honestly it looks like he’s about to punch him here.

The only reason he DOESNT is bc HE DOESNT WANT TO GET HIS ASS BEAT
Btw for anyone who has or ever will be in Izuku’s position, punch him. I love Katsuki But hit him in the fucking gut. If you get your ass beat at least you can say you can took it like a champ.
Speaking from someone who regrets not punching three girls who were trying to gang up on me in middle school🫶🫶🫶
Anyway, I’d argue that Izuku not taking Katsuki in a fight was made out of self preservation, something he very much has.
And last but not least, we get to this lovely fucking page.
First of all…

Hm, ain’t that strange?
I’m not saying it’s fully a parallel, I’m just saying it’s something to consider.
Especially with the context that I don’t think Izuku feels shameful here.
He’s been a hero who didn’t look like one once before, I’m sure a snide comment through Shigaraki is nothing in comparison to the literal hundreds of civilians afraid of him.
Or, even more interestingly, what if he’s shameful of it, and okay with that? Now THATS some control over your emotions. This is demonstrating the very thing Banjo told him in the first place; using his emotions to fuel him. Let himself live with them, breath with them. They exist, and they hurt, and that’s fucking okay.
But it begs the question…. Why bring attention to it?
Clearly horikoshi WANTS you to see that Izuku is the one who looks like the monster now. He even looks devil like, blackwhip coming out of his back the way it is just feels like wings.
But maybe… maybe this is how he stops sweeping problems under the rug. Maybe this is him, Izuku, at his most animalistic form. Him. At his core. This is the Izuku he doesn’t want people to know.
The faceless, long clawed, oozing black monster.
He’s a kid who can take a fucking beating. He’s not Deku the useless doll, nor is he Deku the hero. He’s simply Izuku.
And you know what’s even more likely?

The black pit of anger that Shigaraki has formed, fueling his uncontrolled emotions and anger and despair, with the light tear showing something underneath…
What if, this was Izuku’s black ball of anger and shame, except this one is escaping his body, pouring out and showing all of that for what it truly is. Pent up rage, uncontrolled emotion, anxiety and shame, all mixed into one hell hole of a person—but a ball that can be molded, controlled, torn apart from the inside out.
See, the same way Kudou tears at Shigaraki’s mental breaking to see what’s underneath, so have the ofa users for Izuku. Slowly, but surely, the people in Izuku’s life have, while created that ball in the first place, also worked to destroy it. The final piece of the puzzle is for Izuku to choose to let it happen, and he is.
Learning to sit in one’s fear, doubt, hatred, anger, sadness, grief, happiness—without that emotion having to be something, simply something that flows through you, that you can choose to act on or not; this is where Izuku’s arc is coming to its tipping point. We are nearing the climax, I can feel it.
#bkdk#midoriya izuku#mha deku#bkdk brainrot#bakudeku#bnha deku#bakugou katsuki#mha analysis#deku midoriya#IM FUCKING BAXK BITCHES#I’ve been trying to write this for. not joking. two weeks.#like I have three different versions of this meta that I scrapped completely#they all have their own cool ideas tho so maybe I’ll come back to those#have a good fucking night and happy Valentine’s Day!!!!!!!
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today, the skyblings are hangin’ out in a traffic light!

#shitty skyblings doodles daily#grian fanart#jimmy solidarity#pearlescentmoon#pearlescentmoon fanart#solidaritygaming#solidaritygaming fanart#grian#sky siblings#skyblings#I was messing around on pony town earlier and I made these goobers as ponies#I kinda wanna draw my designs of them. Will you guys burn me at the stake for being cringe if I do </3#who am I kidding. I’ve been drawing three Minecraft people every day for two weeks now#possible pony drawing coming soon /silly#day 14
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trying to hold on to some semblance of a career while having a chronic illness like
#spoonie#chronic illness#i'm an actor i'm pretty used to the routine of three evenings a week and then three hectic long days in a row leading up to opening#and normally that works out relatively okay for me#it is the last long day (10am-8:30pm work hours + half hour commute on each end) and i am Struggling#the last two days have been so much more draining than usual#and i can't tell if i've picked up an additional illness or if this is just me#i enjoy my job! but like. feeling this meme more than ever
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YES PLAY IB.
ITS REALLY GOOD.
I PROMMY
HI NICO AHEHEHHAHAHBHSBHHBDHBFBH GLAD TO HEAR YOU SAW ME MENTION IB FOR A MILLISECOND IN SOME TAGS
#💥.txt#mutual asks#mutual tag#TO ALL MY MUTUALS. IF YOU EVER WANT TO RECOMMEND I WATCH OR PLAY SOMETHING NEW. HURRY.#(I FINISHED ALIEN STAGE AM CURRENTLY PLAYING KH1 WATCHING RANMA 1/2 PLANNING TO WATCH DUNGEON MESHI AND WATCHING FREE! WITH MY BEST FRIEND)#(THREE OF THESE WERE AT THE REQUEST OF BRENNAN. DESPERATELY.)#(ALSO NIMONA. AND CONCLAVE. I'M GOING TO WATCH CONCLAVE. HELP ME. GOD)#I WENT INTO FIGHT OR FLIGHT IN THE LAST 2 WEEKS COMING UP TO MY EMPLOYMENT#AND I AM WATCHING AS MANY NEW SHOWS AND PLAYING AS MANY NEW GAMES AS I CAN PHYSICALLY STOMACH.#IN TWO WEEKS I WILL BE WORKING FULL TIME AGAIN. I JUST SIGNED UP FOR ADULT TAEKWONDO CLASSES. I HAVE BEEN WALKING TWICE A DAY#I HAVE AN ART TRADE TO FINISH#SOMETHING CAME OVER ME.#IT'S GOING GREAT#HELP ME.
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SnowRifle sketches before I get sent back to the trenches (school) tomorrow
#SPRING BREAK. JUST THREE MORE DAYS#thursday I'll get out early and then ill have friday off.......#hhrrrnnnhddhdhdjdjsb#i gotta hang on#these idiots and diet coke have been the two things getting me thru the week#Khaos' Stuff#Frostbite ❄️📸#Chamber valorant#vincent fabron#valorant#artists on tumblr#valorant oc#my art#digital art#SnowRifle
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Have a bunch of sketchbook doodles of my boys (mostly bounty)
#my art#my ocs#bounty tag#law tag#one day ill have a name for their setting#theyve been one of two things on my mind for he past three weeks#and with me being sick I dunno when ill have another full illustration to post#so you get the doodles and sketches#which im trying to get used to posting more anyways
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I can't wait for this to come back!!! >>> when is this coming back?
#seriously there has been such an uptick recently in people asking me about my hiatus#I KEPT GETTING SICK#FOR NO REASON#BECAUSE OF OVERWORK...#like literally without exaggeration once a month minimum knocked flat on my ass for multiple days#and mysteriously since being on hiatus hmmmm#it hasnt been happening hmmmmmm#almost like making LIKE 50 PAGES A MONTH#is a little too much work!#for anyone!#no amount of time saving texhniques makes that less work#and I'm trying to make it a satisfying conclusion#which takes more time#and I'm trying to write as much as possible before coming back#as much as webtoon will let me#because twice now ive had to write and produce episodes week to week#and it absolutely destroys the quality of the arc#in my opinion#it at least makes me less satisfied#and whats the fucking point of spending thousands of hours on something#if im being forced into a schedule that. when i get to the end. im not even satisfied with what ive done.#so seriously like please#I'm trying to be as transparent as i can possibly be without outright spoiling everything im writing#its good#it's fun#it will take time to be those things the rest of the way through#ive finished three episodes and I'm halfway through two more#i have 13 episodes thumbnailed#and i have 22 more episodes to write and thumbnail#because webtoon said i need to make it fit exactly into that space
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also I think it’s time for a little Elly Lore Update because I feel like I mention so many people on here and y’all need to understand who I’m taking about when you attend the virtual sleepovers 😌
#SO. other main characters in this story:#♦️ my bestie (a.k.a. Best Friend Number One) — I’ve known her for basically ever and NO ONE annoys me like her but also we’re#too close and too important in each other’s lives to ever break up (Alexa play “Stuck With You” by Huey Lewis)#♦️ bestie number two — my Secret Keeper and probable future maid of honor. the only one of us with a boyfriend#♦️ my (honorary) little sister (a.k.a. the 13-year-old) — a girl wise beyond her years but also. yk. thirteen. I always have a blast with h#♦️ my mom and dad — self explanatory#supporting cast members:#♦️ bestie number two’s older sister — a dear friend of mine as well who is engaged to be married but is doing so in Colombia#meaning I can’t go and I’ve been inconsolable about it for weeks#♦️ bestie number two’s boyfriend — literally one of the chillest guys I know. he’s also the younger brother of her big sister’s fiancé#♦️ twinkling watermelon bestie: my other Secret Keeper and my kdrama buddy. we especially bonded over TWM#♦️ Coworker Elizabeth — the lady I work with who I used to think disliked me but now always feeds me when I’m there :)))#mmmm I think that’s it for recurring characters. then there’s the Love Interests:#♦️ The Ex Crush (a.k.a. donut boy) — my first crush who I didn’t see for years after first meeting him and then met again last year#and had dinner with his family but he didn’t really talk to me and then I saw him again earlier this week and he ignored me completely#♦️ Big Dramatic Crush — my last Big crush who I liked for two years and suffered over tremendously. he’s not really important anymore#but I do use him as a reference point often enough. there’s Before Him and there’s After Him#♦️ Three-Day Crush — what it says on the tin. a guy I liked for three days just a bit after moving on from Big Crush#and then it ended horrifically and gave me a deep fear of ever developing another crush EVER#♦️ flan boy — the boy who thawed my heart more than a year after the saga of Three-Day Crush by showing kindness and a smidge of interest#but then apparently didn’t have That kind of interest in me so I decided to move on#and lucky I did because now my bestie (who knew him first and used to ship me with him) has fallen for him herself#and yep! that’s the main cast here on whenthegoldrays.com#hope you enjoyed this lore update that no one asked for 🩷#elly's posts
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these were perhaps the hardest two weeks of my life and i'm totally serious
#WHY did these two weeks have to happen right when i'm about to see jhope#almost every day something new and horrible happens#i don't know how much more i can take!!!!!!!!!!!#can we go back to last year please#it's just super hard guys. i'm not doing well and i really think this has been the worst time of my life#here's to hoping nothing tops that right#i'm sure there are worse things out there but i just hope they'll spare me and my family at least for a while#i had a horrible time now i need a happy period#jhope save me... jhope... save me jhope#my post#personal#negativity#*actually make it three weeks or maybe even four#a whole terrible month#oh btw if i'm not responding to your messages at least this time i have a good excuse so please be patient with me 🥺
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