#it's another funny one

[letitrainathousandflames]

Did the bathroom stall person STAY a stranger?

N-S-F-W and definitely TMI content ahead lmao:

He did, the poor fellow! Here's some backstory to explain how on earth my shy-as-hell dumbass worked the courage to have some bathroom stall shenanigans:

So I started dating this classmate in highschool, (the one I often refer to as "the deceased" bc he's dead to me) and he was a major asshole. Emotionally abusive, controlling, made me feel bad about literally every single thing I enjoyed, especially writing fanfiction and not being a boring piece of shit like he was.

Welp! I spent like a decade with this bastard bc he was a classic abusive dickhead who pushed my friends away and I couldn't see that he was a major asshole until I started therapy. When I was 26 my therapist, clever lady she was, knew I was suffering but also v attached to him still, so she suggested us to "take a break". Not breaking up, just take a break, for one month, and reevaluate the relationship.

I spent a long time moping over him but my bestie said "wait does that mean I can finally take you clubbing?" and I proceeded to have an absolute blast dancing and having fun with her!

The second time we went clubbing, it was a star wars themed party! I went as a cute padmé amidala, and spent the night dancing and watching snippets of SW movies that played on the big screens, explaining to my very confused bff who's never watched a star war in her life why I was attracted to the angry looking alien with horns and red skin w/ black tattoos - darth maul. She remained confused.

(Fun fact, I'm autistic and loud environments make me literally sick, but I think I needed this freedom so badly my brain let me have these moments for once. Now I literally cannot enter a club. Anyway.)

While we're dancing, a handsome clone-trooper looking type walked past us and I think I gave him such an eye-fucking of a look that he made a beeline to me and took me to dance (I gave a thumbs-up to my bff bc she is v protective and will push creepy dudes away from me, bless her).

Then we started kissing and fooling around in a corner, and the guy invited me over to his place.

(here's the thing, my ex literally acted like sex was a chore. I repeatedly, gently asked him whether he was asexual, promising to be okay with it if it was the case but he swore he wasnt which. made me feel like I was very unappealing and did a number on my self-esteem. Oof.)

So I was pent up as hell and desperate for a fuck, especially a fuck with an enthusiastic guy for once in my life. On the other hand, girls that go with strangers to their place might be raped or killed. So when I said no, the guy suggested we fucked in the bathroom.

Now, that wouldn't be proper ladylike behavior, i reasoned with myself, while fully cupping the guy's groin with my hand. So I said a very unconvincing no, and the guy asked if I was sure, and I said "we might be caught", and he said "not if we're quiet"

...and goddamnit I was so damn horny and I can't even blame it on being drunk bc I don't drink alcohol out bc it makes me sleepy. This was 100% horny brain in charge and I was the one to actually pull the guy into the bathroom with me.

(We're gonna fade to black here bc I'm not willing to share those details here, but I can point out the funny bits):

there wasn't enough room in that bathroom stall for someone to pee comfortably, much less for two people to squeeze in and do the horizontal vertical tango

if you ever wanna do that, do that early in the night, not after dancing for hours because your knees will want to buckle the entire time and that's not hot

be smart and have condoms in your bag. wrap it up, folks. it's the 21st century and everyone who's sexually active should have their protection regardless of gender or lack thereof <3

the sound of toilets flushing nearby is quite the mood-killer, but if the music drowns out most of it, one can make it work

do not laugh when your very worried friend who's been looking for you all night calls out your name in the bathroom, trying to find you

Tell her you'll be right out and try to wriggle out of the arms of the dude who seems to have fallen in love with you or something.

Thank you for the fun times, catch his phone number or contact info of any kind

loudly announce you and the friend are both leaving to give the poor fella hidden in a stall in the lady's bathroom a window of time to escape unseen

forget you had his contact info for three months bc you are ADHD, aaand now it's too awkward to send a text of 'hey its bathroom stall girl, how's it going?'

[planefood]

rules for thee and not for me

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Dog Meshi.

[faffreux]

it's weird to be attracted to an ugly frog like wtf is even your taste in men

i won't argue with you about whether or not fawful is ugly but it is weird yes, i agree

i have long accepted that i am weird

[chloesimaginationthings]

Everyone “hates” Mike in the FNAF movie..

[friedunicornstudio]

We painted a new Shiranui zodiac piece this year featuring all the brush god constellations!

(Shiranui themself is in front of the Hanagami, but we did paint them. They're still there. It counts)

[humming-fly]

He was feeling left out

and the higher rez stills, since gifs always export as if you're sending messages through a metal can~

[softestaries]

Ncuti rly just rocked up trouserless, played a high-stakes game of catch, told his younger self to get some fucking therapy, cloned the Tardis (HELLO?), and left to go clubbing. Iconic behaviour. No notes.

[cubbyhole-for-flea-bee]

(Not) an approved use of the Power Of Friendship

[anbaisai]

Couldn't unsee Aira's hair as literally pink Azul hair so I had to make this once episode 10 of Dandadan dropped

[southpauz]

☀️ 🔸️2012 》》 2024 🔸️☀️

[heartorbit]

searching for a star that's still unknown to anyone!

[favoure]

"do the opposite of what people tell you to do"

[wu-does-art]

[archdevilsupreme]

stealing the show in Ice Nine Kills' "A Work Of Art"

[chloesimaginationthings]

This is Scott Cawthon’s biggest regret in FNAF..