#it's already part of so many things i don't think most people even realise how much ai there already is in their daily life | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

gabgabwrites · 2 months ago

Text

DEVIL WEARS PINK | Eddie Munson [pt. 1]

summary ⇝ Eddie can’t help but be utterly infatuated with you, hawkins high’s most popular, prissy and preppy girl, who has one mean, vile streak for everyone, everyone but him.

warnings ⇝ bitchy!reader, language, bullying, mentions of divorce, sexual towards the end but overall not too bad, did I mention reader is a BULLY?? Ik there’s no smut, but mdni

part 2

You're everything Eddie doesn't like (or so he thought)

You dress in pink, you're preppy, you're popular. You're known to have the 'wrong' kind of fun, your type is jocks as jacked up dudes. Everyone at Hawkins High is scared of you on different degrees as you've been known to lash out.

That's why people thought you were trying to manipulate Eddie when you were spotted one day, leaning over his desk and talking to him, or when you'd greet him in the halls, even with a quick wave.

"Dude! She's psycho! How can you not see that she's trying to dig her talons into you and brainwash you?!" Dustin screamed as the group sat at a cafeteria table.

"She's not that bad..." Eddie quietly replies.

"Oh no, l'm afraid you've already been brainwashed!" Dustin clutched his chest in panic, his eyes wide and eyebrows raised. "It's too late!"

"Come on man, it's not that big a deal!" Eddie groaned, leaning back in his chair.

"It kinda is," Mike shrugged. "She is like the devil in pink, don't you know what she did to Greasy McGregor?"

Eddie rolled his eyes, "what exactly did she do to McGregor?"

"She pretended like she wanted to, y'know...shaboink him in the janitors closet, stole all his clothes—and I mean all, then locked him inside." Dustin told him.

"When the janitor opened the closet, McGregor came running out, not caring about being covered," Mike said with a shake of his head. "He was the laughing stock for the whole month."

"...did you just say shaboink?" He laughed out loud, "man, that is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. And he's fine now, isn't he?"

The other boys exclaimed nervous looks.

"His dad had to enroll him in a different school in Barcelona."

"Yeah, cause that's soooo terrible, living in Spain,” Eddie rolled his eves again. "You're definitely overreacting."

Dustin shook his head, looking down and picking up a mini carrot before dipping it in the humus. "Point is, she's crazy and you're next."

"Or, hear me out, maybe I'm the first person to realise that she's actually a nice person. Crazy, huh?" he said sarcastically, waving his hands mockingly.

"Insane." Jeff mumbled.

Eddie crossed his arms and gave Jeff a pointed look, "Just because you think she's evil, doesn't make it true, you'd be shocked at how wrong you really are."

"Oh yeah? Then why is she laughing at Caity?" Mike jerked his chin to your direction, where you and your two tight knit friends were giggling at the poor girl who had her yogurt accidentally spurt all over her. Eddie turned his head, frowning as he caught sight of Caity wiping her face desperately with a handful of napkins.

He bit his lip, contemplating whether or not to say something or just ignore it.

"She's—." he started, but just sighed and shut his mouth, looking back down at his food.

"Save it dude, there's no point."

"Yeah, guess you're right." He said after a few moments, pushing his food around his plate, "Maybe I was wrong. She is kind of a dick."

"Oh yeah, big time." Dustin shook his head, the boys went back to talk about other stuff.

For the rest of lunch, Eddie kept his eyes down at his food, not daring to look anywhere near your direction, just keeping a low profile.

He got out of his seat as the bell signaled the start of the next class. He grabbed his food and tray, walking them over to the garbage bin and dumping the contents inside before throwing away the tray.

"Right...time for English..." he mumbled under his breath before turning around and walking out of the cafeteria.

Eddie contemplated skipping, but he had more absentees than present classes, and Wayne had scolded him so many times.

He let out a sigh as he made his way down the hallway.

"Why the hell do I even care..." He whispered to himself. He kept his head down as he walked, kicking himself mentally for thinking you might be anything other than what everyone told him you were.

"Hey, Eddie." You said, as you passed his desk. You were clutching your pink note book that had poorly drawn designs on it. You gave him a sugary smile that stretched across your glossy lips as he looked up.

Eddie looked up once more, his breath hitched as he was met with the bright smile that almost seemed to burn into his skull. He took a shaky breath before replying, "Uh, hey."

"I was wondering if you'd wanna hang out this weekend? There's this new Italian restaurant that opened and I've been wanting to go." You told him, shifting your weight from one foot to the other.

Eddie stared up at you, completely taken aback as you asked him to hangout with you.

This was the last thing he expected when he was warned to stay away from you.

But that wasn't what surprised him the most, no, what surprised him the most was that he wanted to say yes.

He swallowed hard, trying to find his voice as he stared at your face.

"What...me? You want to hangout... with me?" He asked quietly, trying not to seem to dumbfounded at the question.

"Do you know another Eddie?"

"No,” He chuckled, shaking his head. "But, I mean, don't you have other people you'd rather hang out with? People a lot cooler and more fun than me?"

"Cooler? Yeah. Fun? Maybe," you dropped down, leaning your elbows against his desk, your low cut top falling down a tiny bit. Your strawberry and blossoms scent filled Eddie's space. "But not as interesting as you." You whispered.

Eddie felt his jaw nearly drop as he got a better smell of your scent.

He tried his best to keep his eyes on yours, but you were giving him a hard time trying to do that as he tried not to let his gaze fall down to your chest.

"I'm—,” he was struggling with words again, looking down at your top for a split second. "I'm interesting?"

"Oh yeah, totally." Your voice was almost like a purr as you brought your manicured fingers to his hair, before gently grabbing a few strands and twirling it. Eddie's body felt like it was on fire from your words alone, and he had to fight himself to not shiver as you played with his hair.

He bit his lip, trying to calm his rapidly beating heart before speaking, "You sure you want to hangout with a freak like me?"

"Uhuh, I like freaks." Just as your words finished, Mrs O'Nelly entered the classroom, leaving you to smirk before pushing yourself off his desk and walking to yours.

Eddie nearly let out a swear word and just sat in shock, as he watched you waltz away back to your seat, leaving him completely flustered.

He sat there for a few seconds before looking forward and taking a deep breath to try and calm himself down. His mind kept going back to your words and your touch, burning the memory into his mind.

He had to snap himself out of it when class started, but he was barely paying attention all class, his mind occupied on just one thing.

Class had ended, and Eddie was quick to turn around, only to find you gone.

Eddie's eyes widened as he looked at your now empty seat, disappointment filling his chest.

He couldn't understand how he could be so upset over something so small. He never usually cared about girls like this, not even the girls in his D&D party were an exception.

He pushed his chair in and let out a huff as he picked up his backpack, slinging it over his shoulder.

"You're fucked, Munson." He whispered to himself as he raced out of there. He decided to screw the rest of his classes and leave to go to Family Video, where he knew he'd find Steve.

Eddie walked in, raising his eyebrows as he saw Steve behind the counter.

"Hey, Harrington." He called out to Steve, walking over to grab some tapes from the nearest shelf.

"Oh, hey dude. Shouldn't you be in class?"

"Yeah, but a couple of free periods won't hurt, right?" Eddie answered, waving a hand dismissively as he set the tapes down on the counter. He leaned on the countertop, letting out a sigh.

Steve just frowned before taking the tapes and scanning them, snickering on the stupid Sci-Fi and horror names. "Uh, what's up?"

Eddie huffed, "Oh nothing... well—actually...I need your help with something,” Eddie ran a hand through his hair, looking down at the counter in front of him. "Okay, promise you won't laugh at me?" Eddie looked up at Steve expectingly, biting his lip anxiously.

"I don't do promises." Steve told him as he put the tapes in a packet.

Eddie rolled his eyes, "Whatever, just don't laugh and try to be helpful. Now, tell me something...hypothetically speaking, right?" Eddie leaned in on the counter. "If a girl...and let's say this is also hypothetically a girl who's considered to be...popular for 'the wrong reasons', what would you say if she asked you to hangout?"

Steve gave him a confused look. "What wrong reasons, Eddie?"

"Uh...let's say she's been called a bully..." he rubbed the back of his neck, "A dick to more than just some kids at school, in fact, a whole bunch of the school."

Steve blew air out his mouth. "She wants to hangout with you?"

"Yeah, yeah, see, it's crazy, right?" Eddie threw his hands up. "Like, what reasons could she have? It's probably just one of her tricks, right? She's probably trying to get blackmail or something to hold over me, or hell, to hold over all of us."

"Did you ask her why?"

Eddie stared at Steve with a 'are you kidding me' look. "Are you insane? How am I supposed to ask her that without sounding like a complete and total idiot? Come on, man!"

"I don't know! Who is she anyways?"

Eddie paused, hesitating to say it for a split second before sighing, "promise you'll keep it to yourself?"

"I said I don't do promises." Steve put his hands up in surrender.

"God Damnit Harrington, fine!" Eddie grumbled in frustration before telling Steve your name.

Steve's eyebrows rose. "Oh, I remember her. Did you hear what she did to Greasy McGregor?"

"Yeah, Dustin told me all about it." Eddie rolled his eyes, "It doesn't matter anyway, what the hell am I supposed to do? She wants me to hangout with her, like actually hangout, and I have no idea what to do! It's driving me crazy!"

"Do you like her?" Steve winced.

Eddie froze, his eyes widened as he looked at Steve.

"No!" He said quickly, shaking his head. "Absolutely not! Wh-what gave you that idea?"

"I don't know, man. Look if you really don't like her, say no, easy."

"Yeah, yeah, easy...simple," He said, sighing before leaning his chin on his hand. He then sat up and groaned again, "God, I'm gonna sound like an idiot, but say, hypothetically, that I did like her. What do I do then?"

Steve looked at Eddie, his mouth opening to say something before a third voice popped in. "Don't listen to him for girl related issues!" It was Robin.

Eddie spun around, his mouth falling open a bit as he saw Robin peeking out from one of the shelves behind him.

"Jesus—you need to stop doing that, Buckley!" He exclaimed.

"If you do hypothetically like her, go out with her, but, she is a total wacko who will bite your head off, both of them, so perhaps take a gun and a knife and bear spray and a laser gun, do those even exist?" She rambled.

Eddie let his head fall back as he heard Robin's response. "Okay...yeah great idea...just turn the hangout into a whole damn military mission..." he said sarcastically, rolling his eyes once more.

"Look, maybe say no, and see her reaction? Take that as a hint to what you do after."

Eddie's mind went back to your smile, your laugh, your touch, that stupid strawberry and blossom smell—He shook his head harshly to snap himself out of it. He let out a sigh as he nodded, "Yeah...yeah, you're right. Thanks, Robin."

"But I still say bring the bazooka...just in case." Robin added jokingly.

"Yeah, yeah. Shut up..." Eddie smiled at her, flipping her off jokingly. The rest of the week was torture for Eddie. His mind was constantly plagued with thoughts of you. No matter how hard he tried to forget, he always ended up thinking of your beautiful smile or your laugh that echoed in his head endlessly.

He avoided eye contact with you, knowing very well he'd be lost the moment he looked at your sparkling eyes and your glossy lips that looked so delectably addictive that it made him weak in the knees. Eddie was unusually quiet at DnD night

The party all shot each other looks as they played, watching Eddie closely as he seemed to be distracted with his own thoughts.

At one point, Dustin leaned over to Lucas and whispered, "What’s with him?"

"I don't know dude."

Mike looked back at Eddie. "Earth to Eddie." He called out. "You paying attention there?"

Eddie snapped out whatever trance he was in. "Uh, yeah, yeah."

The boys exchanged another look, all of them knowing it was a lie.

"Dude, you've been off the entire week. You sure you're good?" Mike asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"I'm fine, are you fine? You don't look fine? Does he look fine to everyone?" Eddie went of a word splurge.

The other boys all mumbled, "uhh... yeah...he's fine."

"Dude, we're not the ones that have been zoned out the entire week." Dustin said as he folded his arms.

Eddie frowned. "Right, sorry, back to the game..." he mumbled. "Where were we? Oh, so then the Paladin class gets attacked." He picked up the di, and threw them against the table.

The next day, Eddie came into school looking as though he'd been dragged through a bush of thorns. His hair was a mess, he had bags under his eyes, and just looked incredibly exhausted.

He went through his classes in a daze, barely paying attention to anything that was said the whole time.

It wasn't until the bell rang signalling lunch that he snapped out of it for the first time that day. He sat at the table, picking at the folds of the cardboard juice box

He poked at his food with the plastic fork in his hand, his mind wandering all over the place.

He was snapped out of it when Mike's voice called out to him, "Eddie...dude... you look like crap."

"Well, gee thanks, Wheeler."

Mike huffed, raising his eyebrows, "Well, have you slept at all this week? Like at all?"

Eddie was going to say something, when the sounds of all too expensive high heels clacked towards them. Eddie's eyes widened as his breath hitched, knowing exactly who those hitched, knowing exactly who those expensive high heels belonged to.

Just like everyone else at the table, he looked up as you approached the table, all eyes falling on you.

The corners of your mouth lifted, but the smile was bitter, your eyes raked over everyone, biting your tongue to stop yourself from saying something about the way they stared and glared. "Hey, Eds."

'Eds?' the boys internally screamed

Eddie took a sharp breath, his hands clenched at his sides tightly as you spoke, using that stupid nickname that you always used.

He tried to speak through his dry throat. "H-hey.....what's up?"

"Oh, I was just wondering if you accepted my invite?" You asked, dustin shot Eddie a deranged look of confusion. Why hadn't Eddie told them?

Eddie's mind was running a thousand miles a minute as you spoke, his heart feeling like it was going explode in his chest.

He could feel the table of boys looking at him, all of them curious why he'd never mentioned anything about your hangout.

He cleared his throat, "Uh... that...yeah... about that—."

He was cut off when Dustin spoke up,

"What're you talking about?"

Great, just what he needed. Eddie shot Dustin a look, silently screaming at him to shut up.

"Did Eddie not tell you?" You asked with a tilt of your chin. "Well since you're all friends I thought he would."

Eddie's eye twitched, his hand gripping the table as hard as it could.

"Oh yeah...l forgot..." he said through clenched teeth.

"So do you want to go?"

Eddie wanted to say no. He really did.

He didn't want to fall for you. He didn't want to get dragged into whatever games you had up your sleeve.

But something inside him said yes.

Something that whispered to him that maybe you were being more sincere than everyone gave you credit for.

With all eyes burning into him, he finally answered, "Sure...I'll go with you."

Your smile broadened, it was one of those post cover girl smiles that you'd see models give to a camera, hard to tell if it's artificial or not. "Mkay, great. I'll meet you there at seven tomorrow, do you want my number to keep in touch?"

The sight of your smile alone made his stomach turn upside down, his heart thudding against his ears.

"Yeah...yeah, sure..." He was able to say, trying desperately to keep himself from sounding like and idiot and failing miserably.

He could feel the group of boys practically burn holes into the back of his head as they continued to stare, but that was the least of his worries right now.

You looked up. "Does anyone here have a marker?"

Mike, who was sitting just closest to you, reached into his backpack and pulled out a black sharpie, reaching it out to you, "Here."

"Thanks," When your nails scraped against his fingers as you took the marker, Mike could've sworn you had talons, long, thick talons you probably used to shred apart your victims. "Arm." You instructed, pointing to Eddie's arm.

Eddie was reluctant at first, but he slowly pulled up his sleeve, holding out his arm for you.

He tried to ignore the group of boys' stares and questioning glances that were thrown his way.

You uncapped the marker before writing for your number across his pale, freckled skin, even adding a big heart next to the last digit.

Eddie could do nothing but sit there, letting you write your number on his arm, trying to pay as little mind as possible to the boys behind him that were no doubt watching you like hawks.

When you finished, Eddie quickly pulled his sleeve back down and shoved his arm back under the table.

"I'll see you there, later boys!" You gave them all one last look before spinning around and leaving.

Eddie watched you leave, his eyes lingering on you until you disappeared from his sight.

Once you were gone, he whipped around and let out an irritated sigh before glancing at the gawking faces of the boys.

"What the actual heck!?" Dustin exclaimed

Eddie looked from Dustin's confused face to the rest of the boys'.

They all looked beyond clueless and utterly dumbfounded.

"Look, it's not what you think—." he started, holding his hands up in defense.

"Yeah? Then what is it?" Gareth snapped.

Eddie rubbed his face, his brain feeling like it was going to explode. "I don't know...I don't know...one minute she's asking me to hangout and the next she's writing her number on my arm!"

Eddie took a deep breath to try and calm himself down, his leg bouncing up and down under the table.

"Don't tell me you like her." Dustin groaned.

Eddie's heart stopped in his chest for split second. "What?! No! Hell no! Where on earth would you ever get that idea?!" He exclaimed, waving his hands around dramatically.

He didn't like you, he didn't like you, he didn't like you. He repeated it over and over again in his head like a mantra.

Mike raised an eyebrow. "Yeah? If you don't like her then rub off her number."

Eddie's heart thumped in his chest once more, racing like a thousand horses stampeding against his ears.

He had to bite back the urge to cry 'no!' over and over again, trying desperately over and over again, trying desperately to come up with some excuse in his mind.

He looked at his arm and the numbers that sat so perfectly on his skin, his eyes burning at the idea of erasing it, the idea of losing that link to you.

"Go on..."

His heart was going going a million miles a minute, racing like never before.

He knew he had to do it. There was no way he'd be able to explain to any of the boys how you'd made him melt from just a single smile and a touch.

He let out a shaky sigh, before using his sleeve to wipe the numbers from his skin, his heart aching as he did so.

The numbers began to blend into each other, Mike even went as far as grabbing the small sanitiser bottle his mom made him keep, and squirted some on Eddie's arm.

Eddie kept his eyes on his now clean arm, the numbers now gone, completely gone.

It didn't make him feel better. It didn't take away the aching throb in his chest at the idea of you.

"Good, glad to see you've gone back to your senses." Dustin clapped Eddie on the back.

Eddie's face contorted uncomfortably, his heart twisting as Dustin patted him on the back, nodding in approval.

He let out another sigh but said nothing, keeping his eyes on his blank arm.

Eddie looked to the side, where he saw you, talking to Barb. Eddie grimaced slightly at the sight, knowing full well that you only used her to your advantage.

He could make out the faint sound of your laughter floating toward him, that annoying, stupid sound that made his heart backflip in his chest every single time.

The weekend rolled by, and Eddie had to distract himself from knowing that it was close to seven, the time you had wanted to meet. He didn't know the restaurant's name, he didn't know where it was to begin with. He'd asked Wayne about it and Wayne said he didn't know of a new Italian restaurant that popped up.

Ultimately, he decided to ditch you.

Eddie sat on the couch in the trailer, fiddling with the hem of his shirt. Wayne had gone on a night shift, leaving Eddie by himself in the house. For once he actually wished Wayne was home, just so someone would keep him company. He checked the time, five minutes to seven. You'd be there soon.

Eddie let out a sigh as he checked the time on his watch once more. It was five minutes past seven.

He couldn't understand why he could still feel the aching throb in his chest as the minutes ticked past.

Part of him couldn't help it by wondering if you were pissed at him for what he'd done, but he also couldn't deny the other part that was silently hoping you would be pissed. At least that'd show you actually cared.

Eddie groaned, digging a hand into his pocket before pulling out a blunt, he thought that by smoking it, it would dissolve all his worries, and all thoughts of you.

Eddie lit the blunt, holding it up to his lips and taking a deep drag.

He blew out a cloud of smoke, hoping that it would help calm his racing mind and quell the painful throb in his chest.

But it didn't.

If anything, it made everything worse.

The high seemed to make him more hyper aware of everything his surroundings, the silence of the home, the pain in his chest.

His heart rate was up, his leg was bouncing up and down, and no matter how hard he tried to shut you out of his mind, you were still there, constantly reminding him of that aching in his chest.

He took another drag of the blunt, holding onto it for a few seconds before letting out a harsh breath, blowing out another cloud of grey smoke.

Eddie felt on end on Monday, if you found him you'd probably be mad, he'd be killed on spot. Eddie actually had yet to see you in the halls, or in class, but you hadn't come. In done way, he was thankful.

Eddie had tried to stay as low key as possible through the day. He sat through his classes, his leg bouncing as usual and his mind elsewhere.

He'd constantly looked ahead himself, bracing for the possibility that you would pop out right in front of him, but you never did.

He'd even scanned the cafeteria during lunch, praying you wouldn't pop up out of nowhere and confront him. But once again, you never did.

He didn't know whether to be thankful that you hadn't appeared, or upset. It was killing him not knowing where you were or what you were thinking.

But, the last thing he wanted to seem was obsessed with you and your whereabouts, so he played it safe and didn't ask anyone about you.

And it turned out, you'd be absent the whole week.

During the week, Eddie found it impossible to focus on anything. The lack of you anywhere in the school was a constant distraction.

He found himself listening out for your voice, or your laughter, any little sign that you were there.

He'd even looked out for you in the parking lot, hoping beyond hope that the BMW would pull in. But it never did.

So Eddie was back at Family Video after school on Friday, Eddie had actually attended every class and stayed the whole school day in hopes of seeing you.

Eddie had practically dragged himself into Family Video, slumping himself against one of the display cases.

He felt tired, both physically and mentally.

He rubbed his face in exhaustion, his mind racing as he tried to think about where you were and why he hadn't seen you all week.

"You look like you've had a rough week."

Suddenly Steve's voice echoed out through the store, drawing Eddie's attention. Steve stood by the counter, a smirk on his face as he looked Eddie up and down.

"You could say." Eddie sighed.

Steve leaned against the counter, folding his arms and letting out hum.

"You're usually in a good mood by Friday. But you look worse than Dustin when he's lost his D&D book."

Eddie snorted.

Steve chuckled, raising an eyebrow as his eyes darted along Eddie's face.

"Let me guess, this has to do with a girl." Steve stated.

"It's just, everyone, and I mean everyone says she's awful, yet the few times we've talked she's been fine. Then last week she wrote her number on my arm, but I got held at gunpoint to get rid of it, I flunked our...hangout—which I said yes to, sorry. Thought she's yell at me on Monday, only for her to be absent this entire week."

Steve let out a small whistle, his eyes widening at Eddie's words.

"Yeah...that's not good, man." He said, letting out a sigh, "but, what do you mean you got held at gun point to erase her number?"

"The whole group said if I didn't have feelings for her, l'd have to erase her number off my arm. Ugh, I'm so stupid."

Steve rolled his eyes, shaking his head disapprovingly. "Oh come on, the group was clearly being over dramatic. You could've ignored them."

He folded his arms once more, his eyes narrowing as he looked at Eddie.

"It was either that, or they never talk to me again over some stupid, dumb, mean, terrible... pretty, girl."

Steve chuckled once again.

"You think she's pretty?" He shot at Eddie, a sly smirk on his face.

Eddie sighed, dreamily. "Yeah, man. She has such soft looking hair, and pretty eyes, and her smiled, dude, let me tell you."

Steve made a face that looked like a mixture of amused and bewildered.

"Damn man, you've got it bad. " he said, leaning even more on the counter.

"I know." Eddie mumbled, solemnly.

Steve sighed, pity in his eyes as he watched his friend wallow in his own misery.

"Look man, you like her, a lot. But the rest of your friends hate her guts, it's not going to end well." Steve said with a shrug, "how do you even know if she actually likes you?" "I..." the words died on his tongue. 'Don't' he wanted to say.

Steve seemed to notice the change in Eddie's demeanor, taking a more softer approach. "You don't know whether she likes you or not, do you?"

Eddie looked over at Steve, with sad eyes.

It was then that his heart dropped to the depths of hell when he heard a laugh.

Your laugh.

Eddie stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes widening at the sound of your laughter.

The sound of you brought a flurry of mixed emotions, ranging from worry to excitement. His heart was back to its usual race from that familiar thump, thump, thump and his palms became sweaty.

Eddie whipped his head and peered round the corner where you stood with your friends, laughing at the funny covers of some of the films. Eddie swallowed thickly at the sight of you. You looked, well, you looked amazing, as usual.

He scanned your face, his eyes roaming over every feature of your face, his heart aching when your mouth curled up into that familiar smile.

He watched as you picked up a copy of The Thing, examining the cover and giggling with your friends.

All he wanted to do was go over there and talk to you, to be next to you, but he stayed rooted to the spot, watching you with a mixture of dread and relief.

"I'm going to go find a worker, I'll be back." You said to your friends, before turning around in search of a staff member.

Eddie felt his heart thump in his chest as your friends nodded and said their goodbyes to you. He watched you turn towards the counter, praying to all the gods, new and old, that you somehow missed seeing him.

Steve had to go attend to your needs, being one of the few staff on the clock.

Eddie let out an internal sigh of relief as Steve stepped out from behind the counter and went to serve you, which left him out of sight of you for the time being.

He slumped against the display once more, his eyes on you and Steve talking.

"Do you have a copy of Heathers?" You asked, nails drumming against the counter. Steve's eyes widened at your choice of movie, before he quickly covered it up with a smile.

He glanced over his shoulder for a split second, making eye contact with Eddie, before refocusing on you. "Yeah, we do have a copy, I'll go find it for you." He said, walking past you and heading into the back.

You nodded as you waited for him to get it.

Once Steve was out of sight, Eddie's eyes were immediately drawn to you once more, watching you quietly.

He let he eyes roam over the familiar features of your face, the features that he'd been thinking about for the past week. He was trying desperately not to notice the pang in his heart as he looked at you.

Before he knew what was happening, Steve was back, a copy of the film in his hand. He placed it on the counter next to you, ringing it up with a smile.

"Oh, and one more thing, tell Eddie I say hi, I know he's hiding behind that shelf." You told Steve before grabbing the bag and leaving.

Eddie froze. How did you know he was there?

When he was sure you were gone, he peered out from behind the shelf, an utterly bewildered look on his face. Steve was standing at the counter, trying desperately not to laugh at Eddie's dumbstruck expression. "She said hi, by the way." He said with an amused smile on his face.

"How did she know I was here!?" Eddie exclaimed, standing up from his hiding place and approaching the desk.

"Well it's not every day you see some guy dressed in leather and denim hiding in the soap opera section."

Eddie made a face at that, but chose not to comment.

Instead, he slammed his hands down on the counter, leaning forwards and looking at Steve.

"Did she look angry?" Steve shook his head. "She wasn't pissed?" Eddie asked, his heartbeat picking up once again. It was a good thing, right? You weren't mad, so that had to mean you were fine with what he'd done.

"There was no look of death in those pretty little eyes of hers." Steve replied, a smirk on his face.

Eddie gave him a look at his choice of words.

"What?" Steve said, his smirk only widening. "I'm just stating the facts."

He let out a small chuckle at Eddie's expression, a slightly amused look in his eyes.

Eddie grumbled a goodbye before leaving

"Bye!" Steve called out as Eddie turned and left the store.

Steve let out a small chuckle as he watched him go.

"Oh yeah, he's definitely got it bad."

Eddie was back at home, the air on had bust, and Eddie was dying. He'd long taken off his shirt and changed into black pair of shorts as he lounged around

The fan was on, but it was doing nothing to cool him down. He'd stripped down to just a pair of black shorts, his bandana in its usual spot on his forehead.

He slumped down onto the sofa, his chest and face glistening with sweat as he tried in vain to keep cool.

knock knock knock.

Eddie groaned as the sound echoed out through the home.

He knew he should have ignored it, hoping whoever it was would just go away. But he couldn't, he found himself stumbling off the sofa and walking to the door, opening it.

And there you were.

Standing there, a small, hesitant smile on your face, with your arms folded.

Eddie froze, eyes widening at the sight of you.

Surely this was just a hallucinations from the heat. A trick of the mind, or a fantasy come to life.

It was only when you spoke that he realised this was, in fact, real, and you were actually here, at his front door.

"Can I come in?" You asked, looking up at him through your lashes.

Eddie realised he'd been stood in stunned silence for probably way too long. He quickly shook himself from his daze, and realised he hadn't answered your question. Quickly, he nodded.

"Yeah...yeah, of course, come in." He said, standing aside and letting you inside.

Eddie began to feel conscious of the fact you had now seen him shirtless, you had indeed seen his few tattoos he'd gotten.

He didn't mind anyone seeing, in fact he wanted people to know about his sick tattoos, but there was something about you.

You sighed. "I'm sorry I didn't show up on Saturday."

Ok good, he thought, you wouldn't have known he also didn't show up.

Eddie shrugged gently, sitting down on the couch and watching as you sat on the armchair opposite him.

"It's all good."

It was silent for a few moments.

Eddie was silently thanking the gods you'd shown up in a simple vest, and jean shorts. The look was innocent, but for some reason, it was making the breath get caught in his throat.

You chewed on your bottom lip. "You're not mad?"

Eddie quickly shook his head. "Of course not."

He wasn't mad. In fact, he was overjoyed that you'd came here of your own free will, that you actually wanted to seek him out.

He took in a deep breath, trying desperately not to let his eyes linger on the way your vest hugged your body.

You nodded. "Okay, okay good. It's just, something came up and that's why l've been absent, I don't think you would've noticed."

Eddie had to resist the urge to laugh.

He'd noticed your absence painfully well, it had been all he had thought about all week.

He tried to keep his cool though, not wanting to come on too strong.

"What happened?" He asked, raising an eyebrow at you.

You looked down at your lap. "Can I trust you?"

That question caught Eddie off guard.

He leaned forward a little, studying your face, the way your face was contorted into one of slight worry.

"Yeah, you can trust me." He said, nodding once.

"You sure? You won't go around and tell everyone?" You asked, before taking in a breath. "I know how I act so you could use this as dirt on me."

Eddie had to once again stop himself from laughing at your words. No, he wouldn't use this as 'dirt' on you.

Why would he do that? He wasn't going to run off with the news the moment you told him what was going on.

He shook his head once more. "I won't tell a soul."

You nodded. "My parents are...they're no longer staying together," You head dropped. "It's just been hard at home."

Hearing that information shocked Eddie.

Your parents, the parents who always seemed so put together, and happy.

They weren't together anymore?

"Jesus..." He mumbled, running a hand through his sweaty hair.

"I mean, it's no excuse to be a shitty person, I guess l've been deflecting on others," You sighed. "Um, I should go."

At that, Eddie spoke up.

"Wait!" He exclaimed, stopping you as you moved to get up.

You froze, and slowly turned to look at him. Eddie swallowed thickly, his heart beating quickly in his chest.

"You don't have to leave just yet." He said, trying to keep a sense of control in his voice. He took a shaky breath."I mean, it's a hell of a lot hotter outside. You'll fry in that summer sun."

You let out an amused huff of air at his words. "I suppose you're right."

Eddie tried to ignore the way your voice sent a shiver down his spine.

"Stay a while." He said, attempting to maintain the cool, casual demeanour. "It's lonely here by myself."

"I bet." You grinned as you walked over to him before sitting down besides him.

Suddenly the air felt hotter for Eddie.

Your proximity was doing a number on him.

He could almost feel the warmth of your skin against his own, and suddenly the heat was back with double the force.

He was trying desperately to keep his eyes on your face, and not roam over the skin of your legs which were left on show with those shorts.

"U-Uh, you want one?" Eddie stammered before he picked up a cooler, showing you a range of popsicles.

He mentally cursed his own voice for how it caught in his throat.

He hoped to the gods you didn't notice the way his voice had wavered.

"Sure, why not?"

You picked up a red one, cherry flavoured, before pushing the treat out the packaging and wrapping your lips around it. You let out a small groan as the flavour seeped into your mouth and the colour stained your lips.

And there went any hope of Eddie remaining even remotely cool, or casual.

Your eyes flickered over to his, and he swore he could cum on spot. Your lips popped off the popsicle as you tilted it in his direction. "You want a taste?"

Heat immediately rushed to Eddie's cheeks as your words sent a jolt straight to his core.

He swallowed thickly, his eyes roaming over your face and landing on your lips, cherry stained and covered in the red liquid.

"U-Uh...sure." He said, clearing his throat.

"Open up." He hated how quickly he obeyed your command. Without another word, he parted his lips for you. Waiting.

You brought the cold treat to his lips, watching as they closed around the part you had previously sucked on.

Eddie tried desperately to focus on anything but the sight of your lips on that popsicle, the image burned into the back of his mind for later.

He felt the coldness of the flavour against his tongue, and he let out a soft moan around the popsicle.

"Do you like it?" You asked softly. Eddie didn't want to tell you he'd had this flavour a dozen times, yet none tasted as sweet as this one.

In fact, he was going to buy a whole box just so he could remember this taste.

He nodded, the popsicle still in his mouth, before pulling it from his lips.

"Yeah... do." He said in a low voice, his eyes still trained on your cherry stained lips.

Your eyes watched as a small, red dropped dribbled down the corner of his lip. "Can I clean that up?"

A shiver ran down his spine at that, and he couldn't stop the way that heat once again pooled in his stomach. He let out a shaky breath before slowly nodding his head, his eyes still locked with yours.

What he didn't expect was for you to crane your neck, and to feel your tongue brush his bottom lip, before your lips cushioned around it as you gently sucked the juice off.

He swore time stopped entirely, and all he could focus on was the feeling of your tongue on his lip, cleaning up the sticky liquid left behind by the popsicle.

The heat flared, and he couldn't control the low, guttural moan that escaped his lips.

"Well, fuck me." He mumbled to himself, as he watched you innocently go back to enjoying your popsicle. He had to throw a pillow over his lap, and ignore the feeling of him aching between the legs

Eddie was thankful for the fact you'd gone back to eating that popsicle like nothing had happened, as if you hadn't just made him let out that pitiful moan.

He shuffled in his seat, attempting to create some pressure for himself as he gritted his teeth together.

#gabgabwrites #my works ✎#x reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson stranger things #stranger things eddie #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson

304 notes · View notes

cheeseceli · 1 year ago

Text

Sides of SKZ they only show around their s/o

Pairing: ot8!skz × gn!reader (individually)

Genre: fluff and maybe a little bit of angst

A/n: idk if that makes sense and I'm sorry if it happens to be repetitive but ! I liked to write it so yeah. As always, not proofread

Bang Chan - He's Reckless

Being the eldest sibling, eldest member and the leader of stray kids, Chan became pretty much a parental figure for many. He's always looking out for everybody, making sure everything is okay and dealing with any problem. Don't get him wrong, he loves his job and the people in his life, but sometimes it's exhausting to take care of everything. When he met you though, everything changed. He feels that he can let go. He can be reckless and ask for attention some times. Because, for once, there's someone taking care of him.

Lee Know - He's scared

Usually, he is a confident and even cocky guy. With you though, he is scared. Scared that he might lose you. Scared that his job or personality might scare you. Scared that someone out there is better than him and you'd soon find out. He can't bear to lose you, he doesn't want to imagine a life without you in it. So he'll fight each one of his fears if that means you'll be with him till the very end.

Changbin - He doesn't care

I feel like he always wants to give people the right impression. He wants to say the right thing, behave the right way and hope people will be always satisfied. But suddenly he doesn't care that much anymore. Because he already managed to impress you and you're more than satisfied. Above all of that, you love him. People's opinions are not that important after all.

Hyunjin - He's aware

Always an artist, he knew how to appreciate the beauty in the world since a young age. But since he fell for you every moment seems like an epiphany. The autumn leaves are beautiful, falling with grace. The old lady talking to a kid brings tears to his eyes for an unknown reason. He realises how the breeze is refreshing and how he loves you dearly. He thinks for a second that maybe you're the one who brought life to this world, and he is so happy that he can see all this beauty when he's with you.

Han - He doesn't think

Most of the time, he's too self conscious about his actions and his words, like he needs to be super cautious with everything. Self doubt and overthinking is part of his routine at this point, except when you're with him. You're his safe place. Whenever you're with him, he just does or says whatever he thinks and is never scared you'll judge him, because he knows you never would.

Felix - He's protective

He has a kind nature. He usually doesn't look up for confrontation and is always gentle. But then you came to his life as the most precious treasure he ever saw and now he wants to protect it. Because you're the light of his life and he'll fight anything and anyone if that means you'll be safe. He would happily be your knight in a shining armour if you asked him.

Seungmin - He's vulnerable

Most people only see his "mean" personality or how he doesn't show a lot of affection towards others. We all know he actually is really caring but when it comes to you he's also vulnerable. He doesn't care if one can perceive him as "weak", and he's not scared of oversharing by accident. When he's with you, he's made of glass, but he doesn't mind as he knows you'd never break him.

I.N - He's perfeccionist

You're the best thing to ever happen to him and he is aware of that. He wants to give his all to you and he wants you to be treated like royalty. So he is always trying his best to make sure you're treated like one. He always wants everything to be perfect, because he believes that perfect is still so little compared to what you truly deserve.

Feedbacks and reblogs are always appreciated!

Dividers by @cafekitsune

2K notes · View notes

moviecritc · 7 months ago

Text

easiest conversation ⋆ carlos sainz

pairing: carlos sainz x fem!oc (named Angelique)

tropes: strangers to lovers

summary: carlos and angelique sat next to each other in a tennis match in monaco, leading to an endless conversation.

a/n: english is not my first language, sorry for the mistakes and poor storytelling. maybe a part 2 if you like it?

masterlist

Everybody was focused on Carlos' future in Formula 1, he tried so hard to not be worried about it, but every thing he does, the media somehow made it about his career as a driver. So, at the end, he couldn't do anything except being worried too. Many what ifs were in his mind anytime he thought about it.

The past weekend wete the Masters of Montecarlo, a tennis match, and taking advantage of the fact that he was in the city and most of he's teammates were also watching it, he attended as well.

Carlos didn't have the opportunity to talk to any of them, they were seated in different places in the public. Either way, seeing George, Charles and even Lando with their partners made him feel a little bit more miserable than he already felt. No seat and no girlfriend, that's not a very cool situation to be involved.

And there's even more, he doesn't even know a shit about tennis. He played paddel a few times with Lando, but tennis? He had no idea. So he just sat there, gasping when other people gasp and checking his phone once in a while.

"You seem lost," someone said.

Carlos lifts his head that exact moment, connecting looks with a light brunette that was looking at him above her sunglasses.

"Are you talking to me?" he asked, totally confused. Since when that woman was sitting by his side?.

"Yes. You look bored, maybe you just need someone to explain tennis in a cool way," she smiled. A beautiful smile.

Carlos also smiled a bit, in a weird way. Sometimes he forgots that there's people who can effortlesly talk to strangers in a cool and mysterious way. This woman was one of them.

"Yeah, sure. If you can,"

"If I can?" she seemed dramaticly offended. "You don't think a woman can explain tennis to you, man?"

"Oh, no, no, no. I didn't mean it in that way," he said quickly. "Please, go ahead."

She smiled and started explaining all about tennis in the most interesting and funny way possible.

"How do you know so much about tennis?" he asked.

"Well, I'm a tennis player," she explain. "I thought it was obvious."

Carlos noded a bit, noticing a few mobile phones and cameras pointing at them. He didn't realised it until now, and now he was wondering how many pictures and videos of him and that woman would be around the media.

"Uh, well... I mean, I have no idea about tennis," he said, nervously.

"Yeah, I could tell that," she laughed and she infected Carlos with the laughter. "I'm Angelique, by the way."

"Beautiful name. I'm Carlos," they shaked hands with smiles in their faces. He saw some redness on Angelique face after he complimented her. "So you are a tennis player?"

"Yeah." she simply answered.

"Are you good?" Carlos didn't want the conversation to die.

"I try to be," she said. "I'm fifth in the Women's Tennis Association, I don't know if that's enough for you."

Angelique pursed her lips, making a funny face that made Carlos smiled.

"That sounds really good," he said, truly impressed. They were both athletes, maybe that's why it feels so easy to talk to her.

"What about you?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.

"I'm a race driver,"

Angelique raised even more her eyebrows and wide-opened her eyes "Ok, that is so fucking cool!" she remarked. "Which team do you drive for?"

"Ferrari, but..."

"No way! That's even cooler!" she boasted. "I mean, I have no idea about Formula 1. But Ferrari? That is cool guy material, undoubtedly"

Carlos was too invested in Angelique's voice and eyebrow game that wasn't able to tell her that he isn't staying in Ferrari for too long. But they've just met, and being unemployed isn't something to say to someone right off the bat.

He realised that it was the first conversation in a while that he didn't have to mention anything about his future in Formula 1, another reason of him being this comfortable around Angelique.

"And, how did you became a tennis player?" Carlos asked, leaning a little bit to her.

Now, she was focusing on the ball and the movements of the players.

"My brother used to use me as a ball picker when he played tennis, then he broke his arm and I kept his racket," she explained without divert her eyes from the field.

"He stopped playing tennis after that?"

"Well, yes. When he could come back, he was too old and unexperience to achieve something," she said. "But he wasn't very good anyways."

They both laughed and Angelique take off her sunglasses so she could see Carlos better.

"Have you won something in tennis?" he curiously asked.

"Yeah, of course. Matchs and all those things,"

"Have you beaten Serena Williams?" he wondered, with a smirk.

"Not yet," she admited. "But I've won against people who beat Serena."

She smiled proudly. The match was about to end, and none of them were paying attention to it.

"Okey, that's pretty awesome," he said.

She crossed her legs and accomodated her long brown hair to one side, which left Carlos eyeing her in a romantic way.

"And you? How someone decides that he wants to drive really fast cars?"

"My father has been involved in motorsports for a long time,"

"It's always a family thing, don't you think?" she said. "It is hard to find someone who started in sports by themselves."

"It is!" Carlos agreed with her.

He was going to say something else, but they announce the end of the match, everybody standed up to give an applause. Both of them copied the rest of the people.

"Wait, who won?" Carlos asked, totally confused.

Angelique lean into him, whispering "I've no idea,"

They laughed and kept applausing. That was the end of the match and the end of their conversation. Angelique's agent rapidly came to her to take some pictures with the winner.

"Wait, wait," she insisted to her agent and then walked close to Carlos. "It was lovely talking to you, Carlos,"

"Same, Angelique. You seem an interesting person," he complimented. Carlos was willing to ask her for her number, or something.

"Are you coming to the finals tomorrow?" she asked, praying for a yes.

"I don't think so... I have a race soon in China,"

"Oh," she seemed disappointed. "Well, good luck for your race and..."

"Can I asked you for your number?" he said unexpectedly.

"Yes!" she realised that maybe she was too effusive, so she lower her tone. "I mean, yeah, sure. If you want."

Carlos laughed and Angelique did it too, in a more ashamed way. He gave her his phone so she could write her number.

"There you go," she said and her agent was already near her to leave the match. "Text me!"

Carlos laughed and waved at her, when he looked at his phone, he could do anything but laughed again. Angelique saved her as "That cute girl from the tennis match".

He wondered what was about that girl that made her so unique and easy to talk to her. Carlos didn't think about it very much, instead, he texted her right after she left the field.

#carlos sainz #f1 #f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #formula 1 #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz jr #carlos sainz x female reader #carlos sainz x oc #carlos sainz one shot #carlos sainz imagine #formula 1 one shot #cs55 #cs55 x reader #cs55 fic #cs55 fluff #f1 fluff #f1 x you #noraverse 🫧

393 notes · View notes

cursedmagician · 2 months ago

Text

so. let's talk about that episode shall we?

major ii 17 spoilers under the cut, and lots of theories. read at your own risk.

divider by strangergraphics ✮⋆˙

I have no idea what to even think about that episode. I watched this at about 8 in the morning my time, and now I am in shambles and have been for the last several hours. I'm going to dump all my theories in this one blog post.

my first topic, and the elephant in the room - THIS IS NOT THE LAST ACT. NO WAY.

I've seen people asking if this is the last act and therefore the last ever episode in the series, and to that I say... obviously not. there's still so many plot points to be resolved.

like, for example, why would they add in a scene of the prime shimmers going to the contestant grounds if they weren't going to do something for it later?

yes I know that they were already used as merely a small plot device to allow the episode to progress, but when you think of it in the grand scheme of things there must be something more to it.

also, and - I may be going crazy here - but there might possibly be some sort of parallel of when cobs tells mephone to go "home" with him. we now know that all those previous theories of mephone being made with the shimmer egg are correct, because of fan. since that is the case, I feel like it would make sense for mephone's true home to be with the prime shimmer, right?

I feel like this could be a plot point in the next act. mephone feels more at home with the prime shimmer than he does with cobs (obviously). he would meet them and realise he feels strangely connected to them, and then he figures everything out which leads up to him discovering his true family. and I hope cobs rots and dies FOREVERRR

another point to add onto this is that remember how soap and mic took that photo together in the last episode?

well, soap was going through her recently deleted.

on apple (and I'm assuming meeple as well) devices, it takes 30 days for photos in the recently deleted photo to be fully erased from the device. before that, you can restore and fully erase as many photos as you like.

at the end of this episode when everything created by melife has been erased, baxter is seen walking up to soap's phone here.

in a scene where everything is gone, don't you think this is weirdly symbolic? they didn't have any other reason to show this which leads up to the next theory.

mephone is most likely going to find a way to bring everyone back through some way, and it might be through this system. I'm not saying I know how he's gonna do it, but this will totally be some sort of factor in the next act. hopefully.

second topic - what about bow and bot?

and I know what you all are thinking. I know that bow is definitely not gone, since she obviously isn't supported by melife anymore. (I'm a little curious, bow mentioned that she can't escape the confines of purgatory mansion, but since now that's been deleted, would she be able to roam free? just a thought...)

the same could be said for bot, since they were made by fan and test tube and not by melife. but there's been some speculation going around saying that since bot was made out of materials from test tube's lab, they would be deleted too right?

I actually think that's not necessarily the case.

we have no idea if test tube's materials or her lab was made out of things generated by melife. for all we know, she could have ordered the mechanical parts from overseas. she could have dug up the space she needed for the lab herself.

all we know is that the locations made for the game itself are generated by melife. however, test tube's lab has really nothing to do with the contest because it is its own thing.

so I think this entire theory is genuinely plausible. bot might still be out there somewhere, and I'm not going to say on the invitational island because we don't know if that entire thing was deleted too or just the floor's face. they genuinely might be making their way over to the season 2 grounds right now, wondering what is going on.

which could possibly make way for a bow and bot meeting, AND they might team up too to save the day!! that definitely feels like a direction that adam would be going for, and I personally would totally stand for it.

third topic - can mephone X be avoided or stopped somehow?

here's what I'm thinking.

lightbulb actually managed to dodge mephone X here, and even though yes she did get got in the end, you can at least delay the process or maybe even outrun them altogether.

there must be a reason as to why only the person who is being targeted can see mephone X, but that's a theory for another day.

now, this part is less of a theory and more of an idea - that is supported by numerous twitter posts - but what if you are able to see mephone X with another me device thingy?

think about it, what if taking a picture or just going through the camera app enables others to see them, therefore allowing the contestants to potentially disable mephone X for good?

assuming my theory is correct and they do come back somehow, I doubt that adam forgot about this plothole completely. there must be more significance to this in the future.

we all know how the main writing team writes. they think of everything, down to the small details, and the reference previous things that were thought to be insignificant before!! reminds me of bfdi in a way.

fourth topic - misc stuff/yapping

and well of course I had to dedicate an entire section to just my yapping alone. I know I'm still pretty new to blogging, I don't have many posts yet, but I think it's worth it to just leave my thoughts out here for people to cry over also.

firstly... OJ and paper's last conversation was an argument. lol!! XD!! also it was so funny as to how paper got so ticked off after salt said OJ is her boyfriend. I understand that he might have still felt pretty heated after everything that had been going on, + the argument they had earlier. and I know that OJ is very important to paper. but I still think it was really hilarious. some could say jealous. "he's not your boyfriend he was MINE!!"

ALSO!!! also also also THIS fucking scene...

this is gonna haunt me for the rest of my life man. what the fuck. imagine if slasher movies were like this... like jigsaw or something. if I saw this in a slasher movie I would be terrified for my LIFE (something these contestants don't have).

I really really liked the scene where paintbrush was crying over lightbulb btw. jazzy did an amazing job at that, and they said that they didn't even cry to be able to voice it!! she's a very talented va, I aspire to be like her someday...

another thing I wanted to mention is this tweet made by brian a while ago (screenshot I nabbed from me_phone4 on twitter) yes this is absolutely going to be for inanimate insanity. no questions asked. hope is on the horizon guys.

ok I think that is the end of this post. likes and reblogs are appreciated, and also reblog if you want to add onto my theories later!

for now, signing off!! - CURSED MAGICIAN

#stage.drive #osc #osc community #object show #object shows #inanimate insanity #inanimate insanity act 2 #ii #ii osc #ii2 17 #ii 17 #ii 17 spoilers #osc discussion #ii discussion #ii predictions #fan theories #ii theory

63 notes · View notes

youmakethelight · 3 months ago

Text

Dear AMC

Okay, so here's where I'm at following the David Zabel quotes released yesterday. I truly hate to be in this negative mindset and I wanted my tumblr to be a fun space only, but it's what I'm feeling, so I'm going to get it out. This is the most serious post I'll ever write (hopefully) so buckle up.

I'm not doing this because I don't want to continue to spread joy about caryl. I'm doing this because, if there's any chance, however small, that I can help to make a positive difference for the people I've come to care about, then I'm going to do that. This is because I care about female representation and empowerment. And because I care about what these stories mean to and for people, and especially people who relate to characters who have experienced abuse. Holding these characters' stories is a responsibility and those who do so need to be held accountable for how they do it.

I'm going to talk a lot now, but it's going to mainly be about Melissa, Isabelle's character, David Zabel, Greg Nicotero, and the idea of romantic caryl. I'm going to try to break it up into sections just because it's so long.

Melissa

Melissa McBride snuck up on me. I started watching TWD a couple of years after it first aired and like many, I fell for Daryl as a character. I observed his chemistry with Carol and always thought their relationship was something special. But like many, I gave up on the show around season 6/7. When TWD was released on Now TV in the UK this year, I decided to catch up, and season 9 hooked me on #caryl. Specifically, I was mesmerised by Melissa McBride and I've only grown to love her more. It's been beautiful finding the fandom and realising that Melissa McBride is the beating heart of it. She might not have as many Twitter followers as Norman Reedus, but she is valued more than I have seen any actor and she honestly doesn't even have to try. Fans will support her for walking to a car. I like Norman but I love Melissa.

Melissa looks happier than I have ever seen her look and she is honestly the only thing that has been keeping me tethered to any hope that I will enjoy this spinoff. My hype has been 100% driven by Melissa and how she has spoken about being back. I've already paid for Carol merch, which is something I never do. And if it wasn't for the fact I knew she was coming back at the end of season 1, I honestly wouldn't have watched Daryl Dixon. After investing in their relationship over 12 years of TWD, I'm not interested in seeing Daryl solo travel the globe and find a girl in every port. I'd rather watch something else and pretend the spinoff doesn't exist. But since Melissa is here and she's happy, I've still been hooked.

Seeing Carol confront her trauma surrounding Sophia is something I have been wanting for years. Since I started watching TWD again this year, all you'd ever hear me say is "why does no one ever talk about Sophia?". So I am beyond happy that story is receiving a spotlight in season 2. And I sense this is what Melissa is happy about too.

Beyond that, I really feel like Melissa doesn't have much space for her own voice. At SDCC, she said that she's quiet on her EP notes because she's the new person. And David Zabel made a joke that she doesn't want to make him cry (hilarious). Of course, I have no idea what the reality is, but my gut feeling is that Melissa is happy that she finally had some control with her character's own story after 14 years. But I truly don't believe she has even been given the space to think about how she *personally* would like the caryl story to look, let alone what they choose to do with the other major female character's story. I think Melissa respects Norman and trusts him with that part of the story. She knows he's had more power with the other producers - he was there for all of season 1, it's his name on the title of the show, and he chose the showrunner and writers.

And as for everything else, Melissa has spent the majority of her career in a male-dominated genre, all of her most powerful coworkers are part of that demographic, and in response to caryl, she has been the target of misogyny and ageism that is ongoing today. If I were her, I'd feel I can only speak so loud for so long before someone feels I've stepped on their toes.

While I do believe Norman cares about her deeply, I don't have any reason so far to trust that he understands the nuances of sexism well enough to be able to make the calls I'd want him to make. I really feel that if he did, he would never have agreed to the half naked shipbait nun scene in season 1. On to my next section...

Isabelle, David Zabel and Greg Nicotero

I will die on the hill that Isabelle's story should never have been touched by any inkling of shipbait, because she is a dedicated nun. The idea of romance for her present day story (especially with the male lead) grossly over-simplifies the decisions that led her to become a nun.

I do personally feel that the isabelle-laurent-daryl surrogate family idea is *pretty much* just that. I think, personally, DZ is lying when he says that the idea of romance wasn't manufactured. I think he wants us to believe that what we see on screen is organic. Absolutely nothing about the half naked wound helping scene, the happy stares across rooms with a happy score, and the 'isabelle just woke up in hospital and oh look its daryl's crossbow he must have been looking over her' scene is organic. Those are manufactured. Until episode 6, I liked isabelle and I think clemence is great. But daryl and isabelle's chemistry is non existent. I honestly think calling it a friendship is a stretch. Maybe the god awful, problematic "are you going to do to laurent what your dad did to you" could have been forgiven if they'd genuinely had any compelling bond whatsoever, but they didn't, and at best, it came off as needy. At worst (and what it actually was) was emotionally abusive. The thing I have always loved about caryl is that they *never* guilt-tripped each other like that. I really hope Zabel knows that line was truly offensive.

So anyway, I don't know, I think DZ would have liked it to go romantic, but nobody liked it. And based on the way they talked about it at SDCC, I think Norman is set on the idea it's really all about Laurent, and Isabelle is just another adult who cares about the kid so he cares about her too. However, I do think Nicotero and Zabel are invested in the idea that Daryl is falling for her. Nicotero in particular is obsessed with the idea that Daryl's falling for her while he doesn't know Carol is on her way - I actually find him enjoying that idea repulsive. So, I think they've written some ship bait in there, but I think Norman's acting choices will be reluctant. So, as long as there isn't something physical between them, I think Norman and Melissa's chemistry can recover from it. But. Zabel (and Nicotero) are showing their true colours.

While we're on Nicotero. I recently discovered that he has spoken about supporting b*thyl before. So, if that doesn't tell you everything you need to know about him and his idea of how women and romance should be presented on screen in 2024, I don't know what will.

Romantic Caryl

Finally, I want to address the idea of whether Carol and Daryl should or could add a romantic element to their relationship. Lots of people that I agree with have already written well articulated thoughts about this, including this by my-mt-heart. My personal feelings are these.

Carol and Daryl have built a layered, deep, and emotionally rich relationship over 11 seasons of TWD. Fans are aware of the romantic layers throughout the years, and even those who don't follow it closely can see the romantic potential. It would be a disservice to fans to let those years of layering and emotional depth fall flat. And frankly, so many fans simply won't follow. (And if you're worried about fans who don't like the idea not watching - well, honestly, I don't like R*chonne. Love them both individually but I never saw the chemistry and it felt random to me. But I still watched them and cared about them and their story and I even watched The Ones Who Live despite cringing the whole time.)

The creative opportunities are huge. Carol and Daryl are not a stereotypical love story by any means. Their dynamic has been fuelling creative minds for over a decade. I would personally admire any showrunner/writer who steps up to the challenge. Alternatively, not bothering comes across as lazy and cowardly to me.

At this point, there's absolutely no doubt in the audience that Carol and Daryl are soulmates. Their happy ending has been an important theme for a while now. And they are the characters that fans care about. Even fans who don't care about whether they have a romantic relationship agree that their idea of a happy ending would be with each other (and Dog). This wouldn't have to be romantic, but since we know that they are both interested in romantic relationships and have some romantic foundations together - why not? No other romantic relationship either of them could have is ever going to match up against Daryl and Carol's relationship. And why should they both be deprived of romance if they are both interested in romantic relationships? Who does that serve?

The idea that two people can so selflessly love each other for over a decade and end up together romantically is the ultimate bond of love. Suggestions that romance would 'cheapen' or 'ruin' a bond make me question what those people think romance means. It isn't the same as R*chonne's romance. It's quiet and calm and careful. It's two damaged souls uplifting each other. So many viewers are empowered by that sort of story.

It would show that AMC are progressive and not ageist or sexist.

Final thoughts

I can't express enough how much I wanted to ignore all of my doubts about this spinoff because of Melissa's involvement and because I genuinely do trust her creative imagination more than anyone. But the comments by Zabel that were released yesterday have brought back the pit I was feeling in my stomach. I trust Melissa and I will always trust Melissa. But I don't trust Zabel. I don't trust that Zabel is doing right by Melissa or by the characters of Carol and Daryl. That doesn't mean that I think he's evil and doing nothing at all right. I just truly believe that we deserve better and Melissa deserves better.

I will give all of my hard earned cash and time to Melissa projects, but I won't do the same for Zabel, or even Norman without Melissa.

#caryl #book of carol #twd #daryl dixon #the walking dead #melissa mcbride #the book of carol #carol peletier #norman reedus #tboc

65 notes · View notes

savagewildnerness · 2 months ago

Text

The Vampire Lestat notes...

OK, so I am taking part in a The Vampire Lestat read along on Discord (organised by @old-long-john& @inkyblotposts!)

Don’t expect me to be this in detail every week as I absolutely cannot… but I realised I went SO in detail with my notes/thoughts on my read of the first part that I can’t share it all on Discord! Hahaha! So, instead, I’ll post it here, link it there and maybe you’d like to discuss here too? Look, I don't do things by halves, OK!? So did I write nearly as many notes as there likely are words in this part of the book? Maybe... And...?!?!?!?! But this is my Tumblr and so I can post the notes in full here and what's more, I WILL!

Introduction:

I enjoy how out-of-touch with 'the youth' of the 1980's Lestat sounds and I hope that the TV show retains this in some way. Lestat, of course, would be pretty out of place in the modern era in some ways in how he speaks, particularly given that it seems the majority of the last century he's been hibernating with a plank piano and an iPad..?

Lestat says that "there was a romance" to modern music and I'm so curious if that's how he'll feel about some kind of modern music now, or, whether Lestat’s rock star career will just be 100% about Louis on the TV show?

"the way electricity could stretch a single note forever; the way harmony could be layered upon harmony until you felt yourself dissolving in the sound. So eloquent of dread it was, this music." - This reads to me like a musical description of vampirism?!

It makes me laugh when we juxtapose how Louis and Lestat describe how broken and scared of everything he is in his wilderness years in the books... yet Lestat here is like "Yeah, I was a bit scared... but in THREE DAYS I was roaring around on a motorbike...!" hahahah... I don't know whether to believe you or not, Lestat?! I also note here that it's impossible for Lestat's strength to have increased like it has here in the book on TV as he's already too strong on the show for that!

Quote I thought might be used on the show - "All people had a right to love and to luxury and to graceful things.”

Potential episode title - "Pure evil has no real place."

Surely this quote will be on tv… “It was enough to make an Old World monster go back into the earth, this stunning irrelevance to the mighty scheme of things, enough to make him lie down and weep. Or enough to make him become a rock singer, when you think about it…”

I was interested how Lestat describes how he jams with the musicians. Will The Vampire Lestat's music incorporate old French songs and brutal rhythms - eerie and disjointed music, as Lestat describes his playing?

"When I Iose my confidence, my powers drain." Found that interesting…

We'd better see Lestat standing stock still beneath a street light, whipping through IWTV at an insane speed till he exasperatedly tears it to shreds on TV!

Lestat dreams of "unprecedented rebellion, a great and horrific change to my kind all over the world." !!!

Lestat had better use the phrase "A velvet-lined motor coach" on telly! MAKE IT SO ROLIN! Please!

The ache for Louis Lestat has - for ��his romantic illusions”, “his gentlemanly malice and his physical presence, the deceptively soft sound of his voice.”

There's a self-destructive excitement to how Lestat talks of being hunted and known "as no mythic monster has ever been fought by man before.”

Lestat's psychology… “How could I not love it, the mere idea of it? How could it not be worth the greatest danger, the greatest and most ghastly defeat? Even at the moment of destruction, I would be alive as I have never been.”

Lelio Rising.

So first of all… I noted the timeline as I went this time:

Lestat kills the wolves aged 20 (he specifically states that he is 20 on p38 if you have the new UK paperback version of the book… “The Winter of my 21st year” - your first year you are aged 0… when you turn 1 that is your second year. So Lestat’s 21st year is from the day he turns 20 until the day before he turns 21.

As far as I can tell, all of Lelio Rising takes place when Lestat is 20 (apart from the flashbacks when he is younger.) Lestat meets Nicolas and they begin their conversation as Winter turns to Spring in the year he is 20…. He first performs as Lelio in late-August of the year he is 20… and he talks of seeing Magnus in October of that year… soon after which, he is made a vampire. Thus, I think Lestat will have been made a vampire weeks/days before he turns 21. I’d personally like to imagine it happens on Halloween.

Regarding Lestat’s family… Gabrielle has 8 children. The oldest boy is Augustin… there is one girl, but we don’t even know where she came in the birth order. Lestat is the youngest boy. Only one more boy survives… a boy whom for whatever reason, Lestat doesn’t mention by name even once!!?!

How Lestat self-describes: The dreamer, the angry one, the complainer, the hunter, unhappy, ferocious, a wild creature, bitter (haha, I typed BUTTER first!)

OK… on to the chapter!

The book starts describing the Winter and I was struck by how later in the chronicles, Lestat will often dream of this snow and how this bitter Winter is the opposite of death for a vampire - who die in fire or The Sun…

“In the winter of my twenty-first year, I went out alone on horseback to kill a pack of wolves.” Wouldn’t that have been magnificent as the actual first line of the novel?! Just saying…! I mean, it kind of *is* the first line! I wonder if Anne wrote the introduction first, or this?

Lestat being brought back with his wings broken made me see Nicolas’ mind-bird in my mind.

“White-wigged Parisians in high-heeled satin slippers” was so redolent of Louis and Lestat at the Mardis Gras ball in S1 to me.

“Though I speak of them as dogs now, they were known only by their names to me then.” What a beautiful, sideways way of expressing what the dogs meant to Lestat.

I love how hunter-Lestat is described almost like a beast himself and it makes me so excited to see this on screen. I also love the way he understands the wolves’ strategy - thinking like the wolves think. We’re gonna see a FLAIL, folks!

Lestat’s horse’s death is the first truly gothic description…. It always makes me wonder too whether that Lestat found it in himself to kill his horse in mercy for her suffering isn’t as much a reason for Magnus to pay attention to him as the fact that he killed the wolves? Also I’ve begun to notice Anne Rice loves to compare things to insects…

When Augustin says Lestat didn’t kill the wolves, then retracts it & Lestat says the next thing he knew he was lying alone in his room… I mean… it can be read at face value, but I also wonder - is there something that happened here that Lestat doesn’t write? And if so, might the TV show go there?

Breaking the bullet points up as tumblr won't let me post...

I noticed a lot of what Lestat will later seek in his relationships and how he is in relationships in his relationship with Gabrielle. Gabrielle is not a touching-person, but the moments she allows a tiny bit of conversation… it leans into me thinking of Lestat and Nicolas’ conversation… the way she gives him gifts and *things* when he struggles… it creates Lestat the gift-giver, it seems to me…? This is how he is shown love and so this is how he learns to give love. The way withdraws surely creates Lestat’s sense of being “too much” as much as his Father and brother telling him his is ‘wrong’ does?

“I wanted to be enclosed forever with people who believed I could be good if I wanted to be.” - I wonder if the TV show will go down the route of Lestat’s quest for goodness? I hope so! At this time, I think 12-year-old Lestat found goodness in the order of the monastery versus the chaos he felt in the family castle (haha, the family castle!) And I also feel like he felt goodness in being made “ordered” rather than “chaotic” himself. However, I don’t think Lestat would have been happy in the end in so restrictive a place, much as I am sure he would have loved learning.

Gabrielle buys Lestat his first mastiff puppies, a good horse and a rifle when he is 12. She creates Lestat-the-hunter. She later will say she feels Lestat is the man in her, the man she cannot be in this era. And she literally chooses what Lestat will be. She doesn’t teach him to read, even though she knows his curiosity to learn, even from the way he talks. No, she decides the boy will become a hunter and so Lestat does. Becoming a hunter is also something that will bond him more tightly to his home. It’s not something that’s ever going to lead to a route to escape for him. Teaching Lestat to read might have led to Lestat fleeing for Paris far sooner…. I don’t know. Gabrielle will later say she kept Lestat prisoner as surely as his Father and brothers and I really felt that on this re-read…. Even when Lestat runs away with the theatre at 16 and so Gabrielle truly then knows how Lestat wants to escape… what does she buy him? A fancier rifle. A thing to keep him more tightly where he is, hunting here for the family. She begins to talk to Lestat in conversation. But it’s like she’s placating on both sides - so Lestat will stop getting beaten (to keep him here) and so he’ll have just-enough mental stimulation to keep him where he is too: here with her…? I understand it from her perspective. Imagine how alone she’d be otherwise. But it’s interesting to me.

“The silent ebb and flow of life felt deadly to me.” - surely Lestat will say this on TV?

I got annoyed thinking about Lestat playing Harlequin as I read the Commedia Dell’ Arte talking about how an actor plays a single role for life… although… metaphorically, could we say Lestat truly *is* kind of playing Lelio for life once he is immortal?!

After Lestat returns from the theatre, this is when he really begins to despair and to believe he will never be free. I was struck by how he says he becomes more useful in this time. Isn’t it often the way - with no hope for his own future, he sinks into the role of provider and caregiver and the only way he can ‘be good’…. It also makes me think how in the future, when in despair, Lestat will rush to *do* some mad scheme or other.

Hahaha at Lestat valuing his Mother’s physical beauty as having inherent value, the vain little irritant!

I did wonder, when Lestat tells Gabrielle how he dreams of killing his family… given how they have made all the characters worse on the show, I really HOPE they don’t make Lestat LITERALLY kill his family. It crossed my mind that they *could*… PLEASE DO NOT. I don’t think they will as it counters the ensuing conversation, but I had a sudden flash of FEAR!

This conversation though, Gabrielle takes Lestat seriously. She always takes Lestat seriously, which I love her for. Much as I believe Gabrielle doesn’t love Lestat enough… I think it’s probably pretty rare and a very special thing for a parent to take the thoughts of their child and who they are so seriously and not to dismiss them?

Gabrielle seems to love Lestat more now he’s 20 as she can see him as a man rather than as her son. She likes to talk to him as if he were not her son. She hates to be called Mother. She seems to love to feel him as a comrade. And I will say here that if I feel Lestat isn’t loved enough by Gabrielle… his brothers… she literally despises them. I know they seem awful, but imagine not receiving even one iota of love in your entire life from your mother, which must be their experience.

“You don’t have to take upon yourself the burden of murder or madness to be free of this place. Surely there must be other ways.” - This is the spark that makes Lestat first believe he might not have to be obedient in order to be “good”.

I love Gabrielle’s quote “I am purely myself. I belong to no one.”

I love too that even in this introduction we get Lestat the hunter, the killer juxtaposed with Lestat the aesthete and Lestat the thinker, feeler and (he wishes!) learner…

Little break, because my favourite time is now starting - it’s Nicolas time!

Lestat describes Nicolas (at different times) as: a vision, witty, dismissive, sneering, excited, sarcastic, intelligent, melancholy, cynical, bitter, full of energy, passionate, handsome, ironical, sad, scornful, mocking, miserable, weary, dejected.

Will Nicolas say “I too am impossible, Monsieur. Only the impossible can do the impossible.” Surely he will, and surely “Only the impossible can do the impossible” will be the title of the episode where Lestat kills the wolves?

Lovely foreshadowing that Gabrielle says Nicolas was inspired to play violin by watching a virtuoso so impressive people said he sold his soul to the devil and then suggests that maybe Nicki can do the same. “I laughed a little uneasily. It sounded tragic.” Oh Lestat, you have NO IDEA!!!!!

Will Mozart be in S3? I HOPE SO (& think so!!?!). And Marie Antoinette, too! Surely!

Obviously we’ll hear Nicki’s Father was threatening to break his hands for the foreshadowing too!

“I think I loved him already, doing what he wanted like that.” A few pages later… “I think I loved him.” Lestat falls hard and fast, like love at first sight.

I just want to add here that it’s an absolutely ridiculous concept that Nicolas STARTS playing the violin aged 20 and immediately is able to be as good as he gets! He might feel he can never be good enough… but he must be literally a genius if he’s become even that good at the violin when he’d never even picked one up a year ago! How do you think playing an instrument works, Anne?!?!?!?! You just pick it up and instantly - BAM you not only can just do it, but you’re great! If only! And Mozart is willing to take on a complete beginner as a pupil, too?!

In Lestat and Nicolas’ first conversation, it feels to me as though Lestat is infecting Nicolas with his light and optimism and it really made me understand how much Nicolas truly did need Lestat - like he is Nicolas’ hope. Until…. (We’ll return here later in the book!)

I wonder how the fact that Lestat is born in The Enlightenment - a new age of Reason will impact how he is portrayed on the show? Obviously we’ve seen already how it’ll affect Armand!

When Nicolas brings up The Witches’ Place, Lestat doesn’t immediately remember - as if he has repressed the memory as it is traumatic. I need The Witches Place on TV, but I can’t imagine how we can get to it? Nicolas would have either not yet been born or have been a baby when this happened, so he cannot remind Lestat; Gabrielle would absolutely never bring up such a story in retrospect… and Lestat has repressed the memory… so how can we now get to The Witches’ Place? Also, I find it interesting that Lestat says Nicki studies him as they talk about this… to ascertain how Lestat feels about it now?

I spoke of Lestat’s love for Nicolas, but when Nicolas is saying “Ah, you are a dreamer! My lord, the wolfkiller.” It feels Nicolas loves Lestat as well. And of course, Nicolas also says “I love you” to Lestat, in Paris. I love how, in this first conversation they both discover what it is to be truly known by another being - in how they share their lives and their longings and their dissatisfactions and they truly listen to and empathise with each other. It definitely feels like (beyond his Mother, who really was more sporadic in her attention), this is Lestat’s first experience of truly being seen by another being.

“I think I was happier than I had ever been in my life.” Lestat is so joyous here. When he hears Nicolas play for the first time, he kisses Nicolas on both cheeks and then the violin! You can just imagine the infectious joy! And it’s such a contrast to how Lestat is afraid to touch his Mother

Lestat then (of course!) promptly cries! (Is Sam’s Lestat going to burst into tears as often as Lestat describes it, because get him ten thousand gallons of water to drink - he’ll need them!!!! Lestat also cries at the most random moments… but we know Sam is up to the task!) Nicolas seems deeply moved too that his music had this effect. Perhaps Nicolas initially expected to find a kindred spirit in ferocity and rebellion in Lestat? And he did! But he found a match in sensitivity too.

As conversations go on, Lestat and Nicolas find their differences with opposing worldviews and interestingly they often clash about the goodness inherent in art… and yet they then come together in art (for example as Nicki plays violin and Lestat dances…)

The idea to go to Paris actually comes from Nicolas - he is the instigator. And it feels like they are both, at this point trying to escape the meaninglessness of life.

Lestat’s “Oh, oh, oh!” crisis moment really reminds me of… *warning - slight spoiler for first time readers* what Lestat will later see in Nicolas’ mind… and it gives a different vibe to things to know that Nicolas is Lestat’s comforter in this moment and tries to relieve Lestat’s pain, but basically this is Nicolas’ mind 100% of the time.

“It was not better in the morning.” In fact this existential crisis, his malady of mortality becomes Lestat’s eternal yearning ache of questioning than can never be fully assuaged (maybe on the TV show, the answer will be - Louis’ love.) It never goes away, and any time someone describes Lestat as just FUN, I think back to this - because at the core of Lestat (and as I see it, at the core of The Vampire Chronicles) is this terror that existence is meaningless and that no life has any meaning at all. That there are no answers we’ll ever receive, not even when we die. That there will be no retribution or reward or even knowledge in any way. That all there is is existence and non-existence. This will obviously only be heightened once Lestat becomes a vampire, so must take life in order to survive and force countless souls into non-existence…. In in fact, Lestat’s focus on death and chaos has this nihilistic hint to it which is so the opposite to how Lestat is generally perceived.. and, admittedly how he tries to come across, too! Lestat says he doesn’t believe in presentiments, but narratively this all is a presentiment and literally it is to be Lestat’s eternal malady of immortality as well.

I had some very personal thoughts at this point, when Lestat goes about questioning everyone… which perhaps I won’t share…. Well just to say that sometimes when something big happens in your life, you literally see the world in a different way. I am thinking on a time when all of a sudden I began to look at people & it felt like I could *see* the weariness of their souls and internal fragilities, just looking at strangers’ faces and it was really unnerving and overwhelming, especially going about in crowds…

“Drew me as strongly as it scared me.” Isn’t this always the way? I hope the writers always have this quote in mind throughout the entire show’s creation!

It’s interesting that before Lestat heads to Paris he is now toning down how much he tells Gabrielle and instead it is Nicki he will fully open up with.

I love the part where Lestat hugs Gabrielle and she gives herself over to him and he witnesses her cry for the first time and loves it. I had a very similar experience with my Dad once when I was a child, heading into being a teen and I can still conjure the scene and how it felt… and I felt similarly about it too…

At the end of chapter 6 it seems Gabrielle is saying she’s always lived vicariously through Lestat & now in sending him away as she’s dong, she hopes to continue to live vicariously through him still in some way as she approaches what she thinks will be her death? Reading this time gave me big Magnus vibes in how he perceives Lestat too… weird! Like somehow, both seem to desire to live vicariously through Lestat? Could we even say it of Nicolas too, in a way? He needs Lestat, to feed on his capacity for joy… hmm… I don’t know… I’m thinking as I type…

I love the feeling of freedom and optimism when Lestat and Nicolas first arrive in Paris - the true start of living life!

And yet, Lestat still talks of his trembling, terrifying existential dread that settles upon him every night and which Nicolas tries to encourage him to let go.

Vampires have preternatural ability to mimic, but as described, Lestat already learned in this way it seems, in the theatre. I love how he describes his fear evaporating and how he loved being on stage. I love his determination and how convinced he is he will be a great actor. I love how Lestat and Nicolas are described here and there’s a tantalising feeling of how their future might be…

The Autumn arrives with it’s personification of Dread.

Malady of mortality surely has to be an episode title?

When Lestat wraps he and Nicki together in his cloak against the show and rain, it feels simultaneously real and metaphorically poignant.

Lestat genuinely thinks if he could just get Nicki to understand the truth Lestat feels certain of (goodness in art and making others happy through your art), all would be well, but Nicolas still believes goodness can only come from obedience and self-sacrifice and denial and, thus, he knows himself to be evil.

“Light and beauty come together in you in a thousand different patterns” is such a beautiful thing Lestat says to Nicolas.

Nicki’s final words to mortal Lestat are a soft “Let’s go to bed.” (Do you think show-Lestat will be ripped out of post-coital Nicolas’ arms..?)

Finally: Questions:

At the start of TVL, Lestat has been In The Earth. Do you think he will have been In The Earth in this era on the TV show? (As Louis has seen him pretty recently, which makes it seem like perhaps he won’t have been?)

The ‘spirit’ of 1984 reminds Lestat of the 1700’s. Will there be anything about the 2020’s that Lestat will associate with/that will remind him of the late eighteenth century?

“I did a lot of thinking about this sinless, secular morality, this optimism” - will this be a driving force for modern day Lestat? What will he think about in relation to right now?

What music will Lestat listen to? He listens to a lot of Bach when he first rises in the book (while driving his Harley-Davidson. Is there a security both in the structure of Bach and in the fact his music is from an era predating even mortal Lestat that makes Lestat feel safer entering the modern era?

Lestat talks about coming back after killing the wolves and feeling that he was ‘not-Lestat’, so I thought we could discuss - did killing the wolves change Lestat, and if so: how?

When Lestat goes into a depression post-killing-the-wolves, is this essentially a human version of “Going into The Earth” as Lestat will do numerous times as a vampire?

How will the French Revolution impact the TV telling?

When Lestat talks of how he could have poisoned meat to kill the wolves, but meat was too scarce… is he in a veiled way saying that his life has less value than a piece of meat?

“I don’t think I felt the slightest fear then. But I felt something, and it caused the hair to rise up on the back of my arms.” What exactly is the “something” Lestat feels when he sets out to kill the wolves? And why is he not afraid? Bravery? His hunting spirit? His impulsive, adventurous nature? Stupidity? Naivety? Only feeling truly alive in moments that contain the potential for death? A lack of care whether he lives or dies (borne of despair}?

Reading the wolves section, with the dying animals and even after this too when Lestat talks of his ignored/thwarted farming plans for his family’s land… It made me wonder, just a curious ponder - if Sam might have had any experiences in real life connected to any of this stuff, given his family’s line of work…?

Is performing with the theatre troupe at 16 the first time Lestat truly feels pure joy - he describes it as ecstasy?

How can we now get to The Witches’ Place if Nicki can’t have witnessed child-Lestat there, Gabrielle would never tell the story and Lestat has repressed the memory…?

#interview with the vampire #anne rice #amc interview with the vampire #lestat de lioncourt #the vampire lestat #amc iwtv #iwtv amc #iwtv lestat #iwtv louis #louis de pointe du lac #gabrielle de lioncourt #wolfkiller #lelio #lelio rising #malady of mortality #lestatcore

28 notes · View notes

xjulixred45x · 1 year ago

Note

EEEEE HEYYY!!! Im so happy ur request are open like omg my day has gotten SO much better!

Can I please get a Yandere Platonic Lucifer x Daughter reader? (Blue exorcist :>) As well as Yanplatonic Mephisto with daughter reader. ( blood-related. maybe with both readers growing up and realising how shitty their father is??)

We need more content with them and I loved your previous headcannon about Lucifer so- THANKSVSGFS.

Headcannons please :>>>

MORE PLATONIC YANDERE!! YESSS! and from Blue Exorcist! Thats a Plus! Deal!

Platonic Yandere Mephisto Pheles/Platonic Yandere Lucifer x Daughter! Reader

Genre: Headcanons

Reader: female

Warnings:(here we go) YANDERE BEHAVIOR, PLATONIC YANDERE, kind of infantilization, MENTAL DAMAGE, ISOLATION, Treats of violence, Manipulation, mental issues due all this, Mephisto is a psycho and Lucifer is NOT BETTER, LONG POST, I think is all.

Platonic Yandere Mephisto

He's a very difficult platonic yandere to have because you simply can't take him seriously and he can't take you seriously.

Mephisto is a case in which you know from the beginning that he is a screwed up father, and not in the "trash man" sense but in the sense that he has something wrong in his head and he knows it himself.

He is like the Mad Hatter in several ways. and you are Alice. HIS ALICE.

Don't get me wrong, of course he loves you, you are the Apple of his eyes, although at first he definitely only kept you out of a kind of curiosity to see how you would turn out once you grew up having been raised by him.

Would you be chaotic? His total opposite? A little of both? Maybe like Amaimon? As long as you weren't like Lucifer, he was quite amused by any outcome.

What he didn't expect was growing up to love you very fast. But he was pretty fine with it. Being your "Dad" was interesting for him and he did have fun when he did it.

And precisely although you interacted with him daily while you were growing up, not only did he raise you, but also maids and other services, it is thanks to that that you knew the difference between good parenting and what HE did.

He was not exactly bad at the start, just too chill, too relaxed, he was NOT an authority figure, but more than anything, this am

Although while you were little, there really were no Yandere tendencies other than the standard honestly.

to be somewhat unsettled, that already seemed part of his nature so it went very unnoticed.

That anyone who tried to hurt you would end up DEAD, even just children who pushed you or people who spoke slightly badly to you, was enough.

although honestly you didn't make the connection with your father and this for a long time.

simply because...it was kind of fun growing up with him? Look, the guy is a walking joke, a jester, the older you got, the more he wanted to interact with you, which led to certain pretty nice moments, like amusement parks, having tea, things like that, NORMAL THINGS you enjoy to have with him.

Remember what I said about him being the Mad Hatter and you being an Alice? You can bet he made that an official nickname for you and they even played "Alice's Underground Adventures in Wonderland" many times.

This, along with the fact that you couldn't really take him seriously, was what made you ignore its most deplorable aspects for YEARS.

that only got worse as you grew up.

For example, Overprotection was not as bad as in other cases (ahemahemDAUGHTER OF LUCIFERahem) but it was definitely annoying due to the absolute lack of privacy.

If you go to True Cross Academy, the contrast between your upbringing and that of your classmates is much more noticeable (apart from the fact that now you can notice more when someone you mention that you dislike disappears or something like that)

and when you mention it to your father or seek an explanation, you are only dismissed! as if you were a little child making up a story for his parents...

It is around this time that you realize Mephisto's unhealthy tendencies towards you, even when he tries to use the excuse that "that's how demons love" you know that he didn't used to love you like that when you were little....or rather malleable?

something is wrong with your father and you BOTH know it...

which obviously generated arguments where no matter what you said or what argument you used, he would always dismiss it by saying that he was the adult who was thousands of years old and that he had the last word over you.

All this not without first trying to infantilize you as much as possible, without success, luckily.

and it was... sad for you, because now you couldn't ignore these aspects of him anymore and know that THIS was really what he wanted.

He doesn't want a daughter, he wants an ETERNAL BABY...

He likes the idea of infantilization in the sense that it brings back good memories of when you were little, he wants to always have that and that's why he wants you to continue acting like that (if you are a complete demon it is a PLUS because you age more slowly and he can do it more easily).

another clingy one who doesn't respect personal space, although he will at least stop if you yell at him for a minute without breathing. although sometimes he prefers that you pamper him eg his dog form. don't question it. he's crazy

a great pamperer! Before all this happened, you used to love their gifts or at least they made you laugh because of how strange/extravagant/ridiculous they were, but now they just make you feel bought...

In general, the whole situation of seeing how your father is trash IS difficult.

However, it is not advisable to rebel against Mephisto, believe me, he will use his powers against you and it will be FOR THE WORSE.

I don't think he's above using his time manipulation to make the isolation that much more unbearable and distressing, even using his apparent ability to materialize things to make the experience a living hell for you.

He is simply not willing to accept that he is wrong. Yes you accept that it is morally wrong, but isn't that the fun thing?

You can't believe I'm still taking all of this as a game at this point, but not really, at least not entirely. Yes, it amuses him to see you all angry with him, but if you try something in his SERIOUS eyes he will get serious.

and that is honestly terrifying.

are you trying to escape? now the hallway is an endless loop, and time passes UNSUFFERENTLY slow. Again.

talk bad to him? He will laugh in your face, those things honestly don't affect him. He is already happy knowing that you are whole, healthy and safe (he would like you to be happy too, but hey, you can't do everything in life).

hurt him? Good try but no, you literally won't even land a hit on him, he doesn't find it that fun because you could get hurt, but he'll let you do it until you get tired. the baby has to burn energy after all.

hurt you? Yes, no, if necessary he will threaten to rip your arms off to prevent you from hurting yourself in any way or doing something worse, he doesn't mean it but for a moment he was scared by the possibility that you could REALLY do something like that.

Honestly, it was terrifying to see him so serious about something, ABOUT YOU. You almost thought he REALLY mean it if it weren't for the fact that HE TOLD YOU NO, he even scolded you for thinking something like that about him.

If he can't watch you, Amaimon does, and while he's not nearly as clever as your father, he definitely asks too many questions and eats too much.

When he is the one watching, he tries to talk to you casually, as if nothing happened. If not, try to remember old moments from the past, but really? it only makes you feel worse, you already have to deal with his current yandere tendencies and your little consolation is the good memories you have FROM THE PAST.

And now he wants to stain that little comfort you have because of a childish whim...? yeah, fuck off.

At least he has the decency to meet some of your demands, like entertainment or your favorite foods, who knows, maybe he'll let you out again if he's feeling generous one day. until then....

Platonic Yandere Lucifer

He's a suffocating platonic control freak Yandere, I mean, you can see it by how he has the Illuminati.

but you honestly didn't realize how fucked up a dad he was until you were a teenager.

precisely because Lucifer is a very manipulative and overprotective type of Yandere over you, regardless of how you have been conceived, you are the light of his eyes, the person he loves the most and the one he TRULY wants to keep safe.

I can see him having conceived you with some human or demon to see if he could use you for a cure for his condition, but he became almost instantly fond of you.

paternal instinct? He would have laughed unfunnyly before, but now it seemed very real.

But then he realized all the possible future scenarios that could happen to you. What happens if you end up with a weak body? Or with his illness? you wouldn't be able to defend yourself from the outside world.

Thanks to his paranoia, he ends up raising you exclusively in the Illuminati base, in a fairly comfortable but very lonely life, of course, maybe he lets you interact with the children of some members from time to time, but they are all terrified in your presence and have a attitude of total submission. You are Lucifer's daughter after all.

Also thanks to this everyone continued with the lie in which your father lived, everyone agreed with him, someone as precious and important as you should not leave and risk being devoured by the world.

(Can you imagine the members of the Illuminati's being platonic Yanderes for you too? ☠️ it would be the last straw but very much in character).

You lived a life very isolated from the world, but Lucifer tried to be an affectionate and attentive father as much as possible, to be better than what he had.

There were still good moments between the two of you.

Let's say you are a healthy girl, but you know that your father is not healthy, he lives in constant pain and sometimes they can't even get him out of bed.

So when one of those days happens, you sit near him and read him something that you both liked, that's how you used to spend the afternoons when there was nothing else to do. These were moments that you both treasured.

but at the same time he loves you like a demon, not like a human.

and normalizes any unhealthy attitude he has towards you as you grow up, you grew up thinking that all of that was NORMAL.

apart from the fact that he substantiated all these habits with half-truths and using his own love for you against you.

You know he loves you very much, si for him is easy to fool you (in the begging) to believe he would never do something that would hurt you BULLSHIT

Do you remember when he was more expressive when he cornered Yukio? I can see him doing something similar with you, being more emotional and expressive in order to manipulate you and get his point across.

not go out under any circumstances? The world is a screwed up place with wars and death everywhere, he doesn't want you to die, hun, you need to understand him.

not have privacy? Do you have something to hide from your FATHER? The demon who loves you most in the world and who would sacrifice everything and everyone for you? DO YOU HIDE THINGS FROM HIM? Either way it is impossible with the Illuminati's on every corner. Don't even try.

He is a master of emotional manipulation, but it is also partly because he himself is a little delusional, he believes he is right.

If you end his illness, he will be EVEN MORE obsessive and overprotective (is that possible??), I'm talking about CAMERAS IN YOUR ROOM TO "MONITOR YOU", not EVEN having a door as such, but a glass one, and he can STILL see Lucifer SICKER than in canon because it would make many resources meant to cure HIM go to you.

Even if you only have a weak body, at the slightest discomfort Lucifer acts as if you are going to die. it is not a joke. And besides, he would make you very afraid that the outside would only worsen your condition until you ended up like him.

He makes you a hypochondriac, basically.

At the same time, I don't think you'll start seeing your father's giant Red Flags until you start interacting more with the outside world or with people other than him but tolerate them (eg, Shima).

It's JUST THERE that you start to question everything. almost an emotional breakdown, because it means that there is a whole ENTIRE WORLD that you could have seen, A completely different and NEW LIFE but your father took that option away from you.

That same insensitive and seemingly cruel person is the same person who has loved you from the beginning and who believes that he does everything to protect you.

Do you see what I'm going for? He has a lot of control over you, even if you realize what a shitty parent and person he is, he makes you justify it based on your "good experience" being raised by him.

but I honestly don't think you could wake up from the "good dad" (or minimally decent) trance until the incident with Shima and Izumo.

NOW, I can honestly see Lucifer using Mrs. Kamiki as an example of "what would happen" if you were to get out of his sight (aka DISOBEY HIM), I can see Lucifer in general using others as cruel examples of what could happen. or pass you.

punishments never fall on you. but in other people so that you understand that, this is the consequence of your actions, YOU are to blame for this, YOU caused it because after all Lucifer would never harm you...

In this type of scenario, if you don't give up in, what he calls, the "revelde phase", he will simply continue bombarding you with horrible images or alien deaths until he breaks your spirit, but it won't hurt you one bit, you should be grateful for it. knowing what he can do...

(It's like he doesn't understand that not hurting you automatically doesn't make him a better father or more worthy of forgiveness, but hey, he's a Lucifer Yandere).

If he manages to mentally break you or you give up before then, he's the first to go hug you and comfort you in his characteristic clumsy and rigid way, but it's mostly because he doesn't quite know how to express how relieved he is that "you've come to your senses" and that you two can return to "normal"

But in general, Lucifer tries to remain very patient with you. You can insult him, try to hurt him, it doesn't matter, take out your anger however you need, you won't be leaving his sight any time soon.

He tries to make me see things "his way", explain himself, but the truth is you don't listen to him anymore...why should you? after all he doesn't do it when you CLEARLY want to LEAVE.

He would continue to keep you inside the Illuminati base, but he is not above using more drastic isolation methods to avoid an escape scenario (which he may not believe is possible because now you are always accompanied by a member of the CULT Illuminati's to keep an eye on you. or keep you company).

Something that remains is that when he is very sick, whether out of habit, Stockholm syndrome, or pity for him, you go and read him a story, not as happy and lively as before, but in a way it gives him a new sense of hope to Lucifer.

Maybe he can make you love again like before, to have those moments again where both of you were good. He wants to have hope...

the hope that they can fix everything once the plan is put into motion, that he can FIX YOU somehow. be happy again...

but until then, he KNOWS he can't afford to lose you, even if you hate him, if you fear him, it doesn't matter right now. just don't leave him...

Shares, reblogs, and comments are very welcome!

Thanks for the Request ❤️❤️❤️

115 notes · View notes

thornfield13713 · 22 days ago

Note

As someone who has never seen Buffy, that answer was extremelly ominous. I'm both deadly curious and afraid to know what happened there that required an actor to go to therapy. Was it a rape scene? It sounds like it was

It was a sexual assault scene, yes. One put in deliberately to stop people from shipping a wildly popular ship. It did not work, partly because it was pretty obvious what the actual purpose was (right down to the judgemental dickhead there to go 'see! see! this is what happens when you go for bad boys!') and it wasn't narrative, and partly because of the overall context of the scene: that this was the culmination of a season-long arc of a poorly-negotiated BDSM relationship with a lot of consent play and no-means-yes stuff involved (I will die on the hill that, in-universe, if these two had had a safeword, That Scene would have ended as soon as Buffy said it), and that Spike's reaction to realising that she really did mean her 'no' this time, after a full season of this, was absolute guilt, horror and self-disgust and immediately going off to go and restore his soul (vampires in this universe are soulless, it's a whole thing), in order to make sure that he would never, ever do that again. Which, in a show where almost every member of the main cast has committed sexual assault at some point and the narrative brushed right over it, honestly had the opposite effect to what was intended.

It put a lot of people off the pairing entirely, and it's entirely reasonable for that to be a dealbreaker, but the reason it wasn't for so many of us is simply that this was such a transparent manipulation on the part of Joss Whedon (who has a way of getting very judgmental about fans who don't interpret things just the way he does, and actors who dare to have opinions on the characters they've played for six seasons) in order to do specifically that. By the by - one of the reasons it was so traumatic was that the way the scene was explained to James Marsters was a lot tamer than the way they ended up actually filming it, when he got the script and came to the showrunner with concerns both about how in-character the scene was, and presumably about his own boundaries. Hence that comment about never knowing what they're going to make you do. So, Whedon lied to his actors to get this scene filmed, causing at least one of them serious trauma. That this is not the worst of his offences really should tell you everything.

If you are thinking of getting into Buffy, I should probably warn you now that consent violation is sort of a running theme, and one that's often handled far more lightly than it deserves. Which is both more explicable and more disturbing now that we know what Joss Whedon was getting up to backstage. There are some genuinely excellent episodes, also a fair few stinkers like Seeing Red (also featuring: one of the most iconic Bury Your Gays moments of the early 2000s!) and Pangs, which has aged like milk that was already off when you bought it. But if you have triggers around consent and sexual assault, you might want to give it a miss, because while Seeing Red is the most extreme example, and generally loathed even within the fandom for its treatment of two beloved characters (Spike and Tara), I won't pretend that sexual assault doesn't come up far more often than is comfortable, and often in a context where it is not recognised as such.

#btvs #buffy the vampire slayer

24 notes · View notes

sweetcarrotsandroses97 · 1 year ago

Text

Before You Go | MYG

Pairing: producer! best friend! yoongi x best friend! fem! reader

Summary: Life is taken for granted. People like to kill time not knowing it is time who is killing them. Love is not always a medicine, fate is always cruel. Or in which Yoongi realised his mistakes too late and was sentenced to live with an empty soul. There are times in which you can't always be there. He knew he was too late.

Warnings: ANGST, so much angst guys, medical terms, terminal sickness, argument, fainting, character death, more angst, feelings of guilt and desperation. (Let me know if I missed anything!)

A/N: Soooo, this was originally planned to be a drabble but it escalated so, hehe here it is! Also, I'm still working on the next part of Four Seasons. It'll be a long chapter so please bear with me.

Please let me know what you thought of this in the comments! I'd love to hear your thoughts on this one.

Word Count: 5.1k

"Three months at the most."

Said the doctor. You looked at him. No emotion marked your beautiful features. You blinked. A second passed. Then another and another. The world continued on its normal course while your sentence was already dictated. It almost seemed comical.

"There is, of course, a surgery we could perform on your brain. But I'm afraid it will only allow you to live for a year, year and a half if we are lucky. But it'd be dangerous. Even performing a biopsy is risky in your condition, Miss Lee."

You took a deep breath, your hand clutched your purse as it rested in your lap. The tickling of the clock was driving you insane, you wanted to leave your doctor's office, you wanted to run, to scream, to cry but your body was frozen in place.

A soft smile plastered on your face, the only reaction you could fathom at the moment.

"Thank you, Doctor Kim. I'll... I'll think about it."

He stood up, towering over you as he said with a nod. His hand extended to shake yours.

"Please, do so. Come in a few weeks if you start having headaches."

You nodded, shaking his hand as you also stood up.

"I will. Have a good day, Doctor Kim."

Your hand left his and you turned around to leave. Your feet carrying you out of the room that suddenly felt too small. You only wanted to go back to your flat and curl on your bed.

In a monotonous way you paid for the appointment at the reception of the hospital. Your eyes didn't focus on anything in particular while also noticing everything at the same time.

You walked slowly through the busy streets, the evening sun kissing your skin. The steps you took were automatic, you allowed your legs to take you home while in your mind there was only space for the doctor's words.

"Three months at the most."

That phrase repeated itself over and over again in your head. How you wished to just be home right now however, you decided to not take a cab, you wanted to enjoy the walk. Admire nature as you pass by the park and feel the sun in your skin.

Rarely did you ever pay attention to all those little things. Details that gave colour to your life. Details you were never able to forget. Not until it would happen and you'd leave this place. But you still had some time. Three months was too much.

Or that was what you thought.

~ 73 days later.

"You are hiding something from me!"

Yoongi exclaimed. Your heart clenched at the words coming out of your best friend's mouth. It hurt. It hurt to not tell him. For you to leave him in the dark. For him to think you weren't being honest with him.

You both had been friends for so long you couldn't count the days any longer.

"I'm not! Don't you trust me? We've been friends for so long, Yoongi!"

He sighed, wetting his lips as he tried to form words with his muddy thoughts swirling all over his head. He wasn't stupid. You'd been acting weird as of lately. You often gave him excuses of why you didn't want to leave your flat and when you both would go out he'd notice things.

He'd always notice when something was bothering you, when you were in pain, when too many thoughts were going on through your head. He knew you. Probably better than he knew himself.

All those little suspicions, the strange headaches you'd have only for later to vanish into thin air. The way you looked paler than usual, how you were overly tired.

He had noticed.

Yoongi would be a fool to not acknowledge the signs happening in front of his eyes. Yet his mind couldn't get a conclusion. Instead he was blinded by worry over you. Worry expressed as anger. As desperation. As frustration.

"It is you who is not trusting me, (y/n)! I know something's going on. And I will figure it out whether you like it or not."

"I do trust you."

Your voice sounded so hurt and small with those four words whispered out. Tears clouded your vision but you didn't fight back the moisture in your eyes. You kept looking at him in desperation.

Couldn't he just let it pass?

Apparently not. Yoongi was a stubborn man. If he wanted something, he got it. One way or another. But how would you tell him you were dying? How would you tell your best friend you didn't have much time to live? He had planned on taking you on vacation together after he had signed a good contract with a singer.

He promised to treat you to ice cream next Sunday. You promised that you'd be with him forever. You had been with him forever. In everything he had ever accomplished you had been there. You had been there to dry his tears and smile with him. to celebrate his victories and advise him during hard times.

You had always been there. Always by his side. Always in his life.

Did you have the right to take that away from him?

You were a coward. Yes. You knew that yourself. A part of you didn't want to acknowledge the fact that you were dying. And it hurt so much when Yoongi couldn't see further than his own assumptions. He didn't see you as someone he could trust anymore. He thought you were hiding something from him. Which, technically, you were.

Never in your life had you ever hidden something from him. That was why it hurt him so much when he realised there was something going on in your life that was taking a toll on you and he didn't know.

Yoongi ran a hand through his dark hair, his gaze softened slightly at the sound of your delicate voice. So vulnerable. So hurt. It wasn't like you to talk like that.

But despite his heart clenching at the sight of your tears, his next words cut you deeper than any knife could ever harm you. Not even the doctor's words three months ago had hurt as much as Yoongi's words.

"It doesn't seem like it. But if you don't want to tell me, fine. Take your secrets to your grave, I don't care."

Take your secrets to your grave.

If only he knew you were already standing above it. If only he had known those words had made your heart shatter in such a way you couldn't even fathom to say something, if only he knew there was more that met his sight.

If only he knew.

You didn't say anything. Silent tears were running down your cheeks. This was it. The tread you feared would ever break. He had broken it when you were already so sick, when your days were numbered. He had broken a friendship of years with a single sentence.

You were to blame too. If you hadn't been so scared, this argument would have never happened. This gap wouldn't exist. You are to blame too. You are at fault too. You ruined his trust, played with his emotions, wasted his time. All for what? So that you could keep a secret that would eventually come out?

But now it was too late.

Yoongi didn't want to hear anything else. You opened your mouth to say something. Anything at all. But the words died in your throat, shot down by his disappointed declaration instead.

"I'm leaving. I need some space to think."

Your hands trembled as they hung next to you limply. You were losing him. Yoongi, who was your closest friend, your best friend. The closest thing you ever had of a family. The man who owned your heart in more ways than he thought.

You lost him.

He wasn't going to intrude where he wasn't welcome. He wasn't going to push you. If you weren't going to trust him, there was no point in him staying in a place he no longer felt welcomed.

Yoongi turned around and left, not allowing you to say a single word. He wished you had stopped him. He wished you had walked over to him and grabbed his wrist, pleading him to listen. For you to tell him whatever was happening that made you hide it.

He wanted to know.

He needed to know.

Because his heart screamed a name he didn't want to recognise. His soul yearned for the touch of a woman he was yet to take into account. His mind was busy with thoughts of you. Memories of you. Plans with you.

But he didn't know what it meant. He didn't know what he so deeply desired. Needed. So he left.

Yoongi left you to yourself, your front door shut and you were alone. Alone for good. Left behind. Abandoned. Everyone has a limit and Yoongi has gotten to that limit.

He said he needed space to think. Space to be on his own. Time to think if your friendship was worthy of keeping or if he had to let it go. Despite the pain his soul would suffer and the wrecked heart he'd have to endure.

Sometimes it's better to just let go.

But he didn't know what he was letting go. He didn't know anything. Yoongi left without answers and you stayed with a broken heart.

It's been a week since that argument. There had been no calls or texts from Yoongi. And you weren't going to get in contact first either. He wanted space, you'd give him that. He wanted time, you'd give him what you had left.

You sat in front of your desk, soft rain pattered over the glass. It was calming. Soothing in a way. A pen rested in your hand as words were being scribbled down on a sheet of paper addressed to him. To Yoongi.

You were giving him all the time you had for him to come back. But just in case you ran out of it, you wanted to explain everything to him. He deserved to know. You realised that now. He had deserved to know since the very beginning.

But you were scared. You had been selfish. You chose to live in a fantasy when reality clawed its way through you, tearing you apart in your little safe world that you wish would come true. But wishes never come true. There are no happy endings for liars. There is no mercy to change your fate.

You put the letter on an envelope with Yoongi's name written on the front. It was a letter only for his eyes to read and his mind to comprehend. It was for his mind to keep and his heart to treasure. Only for him. Always for him.

You stood up, the destination of your bedroom in mind as you were feeling tired. It wasn't unusual these days. The naps you took were getting longer and longer. You knew one day you might as well not wake up again.

But fate wasn't that merciful. You took a step, a single step forward only to have a piercing ache in your head that made you hiss. You shut your eyes, trying to get it to pass but it didn't work. If only it only got stronger with each passing second.

Your hands clasped at your scalp, fingers pulling your hair in a desperate need of relief.

The realisation hit you stronger than a train. You needed help. And you needed it fast. You stumbled towards the coffee table, the only goal in your mind was to get your phone and call for help. Something was wrong. Very wrong. You knew it. You felt it. You couldn't ignore it anymore.

With a shaking hang you reached for your phone, you didn't even bother to unlock it as you pressed the emergency call button. It rang and rang and rang, the pain continued to increase, your vision blurred.

You prayed to the skies that the person on the other line would answer. It was your only chance. The last straw to life you clawed at desperately. But it rang again and again and again and you couldn't help thinking that perhaps this was it.

Yoongi came back from the bathroom in his studio, he had been working on some new beats he wanted to try out in the near future. He had been keeping himself busy with work so as to not think about the fight he had with you a week ago.

A part of him wished you'd call him or text him but he knew you too well. If he had asked for space you were going to give him that. This was probably the worst fight you two had ever had throughout your years of friendship

He sat back down in front of the large computer screen, putting on his headphones. Yoongi continued with his work.

It wasn't until out of the corner of his eyes he saw the phone's screen lighten up. He didn't have to look at it to know someone was calling him. He sighed, taking the headphones off and saving the file with his music before he blindly picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

But there was silence. No-one answered back and for a moment, Yoongi thought it was one of those scam calls he always blocked. But before he could hang up, his name reached his ear in your whispered voice.

"Yoongi..."

He knew something was wrong the moment the first syllable reached him. He frowned, leaning forward in his chair as he tried to listen to your voice.

"(y/n)? What's wrong? Are you alright?"

The fight he had with you vanished from his thoughts as they were clouded with worry for you. He was getting scared, never in your life had you called him in such a state that it made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up with nerves.

You whimpered, pressing the phone close to your ear. The pain in your head was getting stronger and stronger that you couldn't speak.

"(y/n)?"

Your best friend's voice came from the other side of the phone, if you hadn't been so blinded by the white pain pressing on your skull you would have noticed the concern in his deep voice.

"(y/n), you are scaring me, what's going on?"

Yoongi stood up from his chair, grabbing his car keys in a hurry.

"H-help me."

When you dialled your emergency contact you didn't remember you had saved Yoongi's number there.

Those two words were enough to have him bolting out of the door. The destination of your place carved in his mind as he left the building.

He kept his phone pressed to his ear as he ran through the studio. His heart was beating so fast in his chest he thought it would leave his body. Adrenaline pumped in his veins. Something was wrong. Something was very wrong.

The fact itself scared him, because that something had to do with you. He felt as if the building was larger than normal. Like in those nightmares as he tried to reach the exit but it got further and further away. This had to be a nightmare, right?

He heard your gasp through the phone unaware of the fact that you had fallen to your knees in your apartment, your other hand clutching your head in a vice grip.

"(y/n/n) talk to me. I need you to say something. Please."

Yoongi reached the door and pulled on the handle with more force than was needed. He stepped outside, inhaling the humid air as the soft drizzle tapped against his form.

"I'm sorry."

He yanked the car door open and got inside, one hand was on the steering wheel while the other still held his phone against the side of his face.

"It's alright, (y/n). I'm on my way, okay? Just hold on, I'll be there in a second."

But you didn't hear those words from him. There was a ringing in your ears that took hold of your senses, the phone slipped from your grasp as you fell to the ground over the soft carpet with a dry sound. You closed your eyes, allowing the pain to take you in its claws of darkness as you surrendered yourself to it.

You had been fighting for so long. A little nap wouldn't harm you. You slipped into unconsciousness with the last thought in your mind being: Yoongi.

The man who you were previously speaking to fell into a frenzy when he heard the sound of the phone colliding with your carpeted floor. The hand on the wheel tightened to the point where his knuckles turned white.

"Darling, answer me please! Say something."

But he could only hear your laboured breaths from the other line. He ended the call and threw his phone on the passenger's seat. A curse leaving his lips. If the circumstances had been different, he would have blushed when the nickname escaped his lips but he couldn't fight it in a moment like this. He couldn't help the fear, the anxiety, the stress, the guilt from controlling his mind.

From making him act the way he was. He pressed on the gas and accelerated into the street. Not caring if he got a ticket for the speed limit, not caring if he drenched the bypassers with his car, not caring for anything else other than getting to you.

Tears of desperation began forming in his dark eyes but he blinked them back. It was not the time to cry. Not now. Not when you needed him. Not when you were in danger. Not when you had called him to help you. Not when his heart yearned to have you, feel you, touch you.

Not now.

Yoongi arrived at your flat in record time. With his heart thumping in his chest and his hands trembling, he stepped out of the car. He didn't even bother to lock it behind him as he was already running up the stairs that led to your apartment.

He used his spare key, one he was immensely grateful you had given him. Not bothering to knock or to take his shoes off he barged into the place like a desperate man. He was a desperate man.

Desperate to see you fine, to find you healthy, for you to be alright.

But his world came crumbling down like a paper plane when he saw you laying over the grey carpet, your phone by your side. You weren't moving.

For a moment he couldn't move. The patterning of the rain against the window drowned him in an ocean of tears he was keeping inside his soul. The quietness of your flat wasn't normal, you were always humming to yourself, playing some music. Doing something.

But as he saw you laying there, limp and cold, Yoongi's heart shattered into a million pieces.

He was brought out of his trance by some miracle, he found himself at your side the next second. His hands wouldn't stop shaking as he pulled your shoulder to lay you flat against the floor.

"(y/n)?"

But you didn't react. It almost seemed as if you were sleeping. The rise and fall from your chest was the only indication to Yoongi that you had only fainted. The circumstances as to why were still unknown to him.

His hand cradled your cheek, trying to get a reaction out of you. Something. Anything at all. But you were long gone in the world of darkness.

In a mere second, he was able to recall your call with him. You sounded in pain. Hurt. There was something that had led to your current state. Something that needed medical attention.

His hands slipped under your body and he stood up; an arm beneath your shoulders and the other supporting the back of your knees. Yoongi walked towards his car in long and hurried steps. His heart was beating wildly in his chest. His stomach churned with nerves.

If you hadn't called him, how much time would have passed until someone eventually found you? He couldn't think of that possibility. He decided to focus on the now, on the fact that he had you in his arms, that he had found you, that you were going to be okay. You had to be. For his sanity.

The soft rain wasn't enough to drench you or him as he made his way towards his parked car. With as much care as he could muster and with some tricky manoeuvre he managed to sit you in the passenger's seat and strap you to it.

Your head lulled to the side and his hand, once more, found home against the side of your face. In any other situation Yoongi would have thought that you were merely sleeping. To a point you were.

Have you always been this beautiful?

He thought to himself before he shook himself out of those thoughts and walked around the car, getting into the driver's seat and speeding off to the hospital.

One hand was on the steering wheel while the other one clasped yours tightly. It was a way to ground himself. To ground his thoughts and remember that you were there, that you'd be fine. That you were with him.

If someone had asked Yoongi before today when he had been the most patient he'd have answered when he had to download one of his large files.

But now, now as he sat in the waiting room of the hospital waiting for news about you was the time when his patience got tested.

How he wished to just enter into the room where the doctor was checking you. He needed to know what was going on. What had happened to you.

He needed to know that everything was going to be fine.

In his desperation, he called one of his friends, Hoseok and explained the situation with a lump forming at the back of his throat.

"She'll be fine, Yoongi. She's a tough girl. I'm sure it's nothing serious but I'll be there in thirty minutes in case you need anything."

That was what Hoseok had said over the line. He had met you on a few occasions, more than a few to be honest. The sweet man came to know that you were a beautiful woman with a kind heart and he respected too much the friendship Yoongi had with you.

"Is anyone here for Lee (y/n)?"

A doctor said with a clipboard in his hands. Yoongi immediately got up. His legs carrying him to the man dressed in a white coat, his eyes were red with unshed tears.

"I brought her here. Please, is she alright?"

The doctor let out a sigh that made alarm bells ring in his head.

"You better come with me."

Yoongi swallowed yet the lump in his throat only got bigger and bigger with each passing second, with each step he took behind the doctor. He stopped in front of a door, presumably your room before he spoke, his tone professional with a hint of sorrow for the broken man in front of him.

"(y/n)'s condition worsened too much in the last week. I'm surprised how quickly it deteriorated. The tumour in her brain got to the amygdala, that was what caused her immense pain resulting in her to lose consciousness."

The tumour in her brain...

...what?

"What... what do you mean with "the tumour in her brain"? She... Is she-"

So many thoughts were racing through his mind too quickly he began to feel nauseous. You were sick? All this time you had been sick? Is this what you had been hiding? The doctor sighed yet again as he spoke once more, his voice sombre this time.

"I believe she never told you."

Yoongi shook his head. Too in shock to utter a word. He felt as if someone had stabbed him in the heart. He'd bet that a stab wound would hurt less than this. The sole thought of losing you was heartbreaking enough but he couldn't help but feel like shit when the argument he had on your flat repeated itself in his mind over and over and over again.

Like a broken record player.

In a mocking manner.

With sadistic intentions.

"I'm sorry you had to find out this way, Mr. Min."

A tear rolled down Yoongi's cheek slowly.

"Will she be alright?"

The world might as well end now because the younger man couldn't fathom the idea of existing. Not after the doctor's next words.

"I'm sorry. She was never a candidate for surgery, we detected the tumour too late. She isn't conscious right now but you might as well go in. I don't think she'd be able to hold on for much longer."

He hadn't expected that. He was supposed to be told you hadn't been taking your meals or you were dehydrated to the point in which you fainted. You weren't supposed to be dying. And what was worse was that he had never known.

For how long have you known of your condition?

Why did you hide it from him?

Why didn't you let him support you?

Yoongi entered your room without another word leaving his lip. He nearly collapsed at the sight of you. Pale and weak lying in a hospital bed. An IV tube was attached to your hand. Your eyes were closed.

He sat on the chair next to your bed. His trembling hands reached out for your smaller one. Why wouldn't his hands stop shaking?

"Why didn't you tell me, (y/n)?"

Those whispered words were meant for your ears only but they never reached you. You couldn't react to his stimuli even if you wanted to. your limp hand in his made tears cloud his vision and this time, he didn't hold them back.

"This was it, wasn't it? This was what you were hiding from me, right?"

He wished you'd just move, he wished you would open your eyes and gaze at him like all those times before. He wished he could hear your voice. At least one last time.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry for shouting at you that day. Y-you didn't deserve that."

If he could turn back time he'd make everything different.

"Please, (y/n/n). Please open your eyes."

If only he had been more observant.

"You cannot leave me now. Not now. Not like this."

If only he hadn't been so selfish and distanced himself from you.

"I cannot live without you, (y/n)."

If only he had been there.

"Please."

If only he had been a better friend. The best friend you deserved. The best friend you needed.

"Please don't leave me."

If only he had said the words when you could hear them. If only he hadn't taken your time for granted.

"I beg you, darling. Please don't go. Please."

Hoseok ran through the halls, the number of the room you were at was engraved in his mind for he knew Yoongi was by your side. His hand grabbed the door handle and he twisted it.

What Hoseok saw after opening that door was never going to leave his memories. A sight for his eyes to never forget.

Yoongi was grasping your hand so tightly his knuckles were white. His eyes were red and puffy as tears leaked from his dark orbs, like endless rivers of absolute and utter pain. The sound of his sobs reached Hoseok's ears. A flat line in the background.

"S-she's... she's gone. She's g-gone, Hobi."

Hoseok could only watch in horror. Never in his life had he seen Min Yoongi look so broken. So empty. Never had he cried in such a way. The sight was painful enough that tears made their way to his own eyes.

Yoongi's sobs were like poisonous arrows dripping with the blood of his wounded heart. An irreparable wound. Shattered pieces of his very own soul.

Hoseok took slow steps toward his friend until he was able to rest a hand over his shoulder.

"She didn't suffer, Yoongi. You were by her side, you allowed her to go in peace."

But those words did little to console him. He couldn't stop thinking about the "what if's". He couldn't stop the blame to gnaw at his already broken heart.

"I-I never told her, Hobi. I was a coward and I... I never fucking told her."

Hoseok's heart clenched at the pain laced in his friend's words. His pale hand grabbed yours with more strength, if that was even possible. As if he could prevent you from leaving him when you were already gone.

"I never told her that I loved her!"

Hi Yoongs, I hope you are alright.

How's life going on for you?

If you are reading this letter it probably means I am no longer with you and I'm so sorry that I had to leave you behind but as you may already know, I had no choice.

This was what I had been hiding from you. I am sick. Terminal apparently. There's nothing to be done and I don't want any kind of painful treatment. I decided to let go and enjoy what I had of time.

Please don't blame yourself. I chose not to tell you so that I could experience my life as it was. Normally and by your side.

I may not be there physically but know that I live through your memories. Please don't give up on your dreams because of me and go and do all the things you talked to me about. Fulfil our wishes. Be happy.

I wish you the best.

Thank you for being my best friend. And it is probably the worst way of saying this but I want you to know that I love you. I love you in that way. As in more than a friend. You were the best person that ever crossed paths with me, I didn't want to ruin that friendship.

I now realise that was probably a mistake. I loved you deeply. With all my heart and being. That was why telling you about my condition was more painful than it should have been. Because just as your happiness is my happiness; your pain is also my pain.

I didn't want to hurt you. I didn't want you to say things out of pity. I didn't want that. I wanted to leave in the most normal way I possibly could.

Please know that I love you and I wish you the best in life. I won't be your friend all your life, let alone your lover. I won't live that long. But I will treasure your friendship and love you all my life.

I am part of your life but you are my whole life.

~(y/n).

July/30/2023

~Masterlist

Likes, Comments and Reblogs are really appreciated!!!

**☕Caffeinate me so I can keep on writing! ☕

#yoongi x reader #min yoongi #sweetcarrotsandroses97 #min yoongi x y/n #min yoongi x reader #bts fanfic #yoongi #yoongi x reader angst #best friend yoongi #min yoongi x reader angst #love #bts fic #yoongi oneshot #bts #bts angst #bts suga #suga bts #min yoongi x you

236 notes · View notes

leggerefiore · 2 months ago

Note

c. could i get somethin about avery’s s/o using his lap as a pillow. pls. i got him in masters and he’s too cute i can’t stand it AGHH 😫😫😫

cw: short drabble, fluff

pairing: Avery/Reader

Avery was not usually one to blatantly express his concern for others. Admittedly, he was well aware of how self-centred he could be, but there was a sense of camaraderie with certain people that let him bravely express those thoughts. You were chief among them. Naturally, of course, as you were his partner. He crossed his arms across his chest. There was no need for telepathy to understand how plainly exhausted you were. You had been helping him train, which he had deeply appreciated, but your health was concerning for him.

Really, if you fell sick… He shuddered to think about whom he might have to pair up with. Those kids from the dojo had been following him around with sparkling eyes. Instead, he thought of a better solution. Your shared lodgings were far off to warrant a trip back, especially with how he had made plans to train with Klara later. Ditching that… He could already hear her. No. That was not to happen. His Future Sight had predicted a horrible headache if he did. Instead, he sat down on the ground and motioned for you to join him.

You easily met his movements, sitting down beside him. The forest you two had settled in was to help train him again bug types, but he had unfortunately been overwhelmed. “… Are you exhausted?” he asked plainly, “It would be quite inelegant if you passed out…” He offered his lap to you with a sigh. You blinked a few times in reply. “Why don't you have a nap here? With my psychic prowess, you should be more than safe to relax.” That slight bit of coaxing seemed to help you catch on to what he meant. Your head rested on his thighs soon enough. He let out a huff. It was just the two of you as far as he was aware, not that he would care too much if someone spied you two together.

His hand found your hair as he decided to ponder the training session that had just happened. You two had seemed quite in sync, but there were times you had been unable to match up with him. It seemed he was struggling even with you. Annoyance ate at him. You two really should have been in perfect sync – He was your boyfriend! And he was most at ease in your presence over anyone else. Maybe that was part of the issue? He felt your cheek nuzzle against his leg. His fingers gently massaged your scalp. If only he were able to read your thoughts… Or predict things. His only psychic talent was truly telekinesis even still… Being surrounded by so many more talented psychics was driving him mad. What if they caught your attention? That Elite Four member from Sinnoh had him especially on edge.

But… His gaze shifted down to you, napping comfortably on his lap. Avery let himself relax. Right… You saw more in him than just his psychic abilities. Another sigh left him. Why was he so insecure? You clearly felt strongly for him… You had even supported him after he lost his position as a gym trainer. He pushed up his glasses to rub at his eyes.

As Klara approached the meeting place, she stomped up in annoyance. Her bow had gotten stuck in some limbs a few times already. Why had Avery chosen such an obnoxious place? That top hat of his was assuredly falling off his head if her bow was getting stuck. She was grumbling quite loudly up until she found herself floating off the ground. Her gaze travelled to Avery, who was shooting an icy glare at her with a finger firmly place on his lips.

The pink haired woman quickly realised why when she spotted the person napping on his lap. Great. Another thing to seethe over.

#pokemon x reader #avery/reader #pokemon avery x reader #avery x reader #pokemon/reader #pokemon avery/reader

22 notes · View notes

uravitypng · 2 years ago

Text

𝐈 𝐓𝐀𝐋𝐊 𝐓𝐎𝐎 𝐌𝐔𝐂𝐇: 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐓𝐖𝐎

pairing: kaminari denki x reader, (hanta sero x reader)

word count: 3.8k

content warnings/things in part two: gardening bashing, pet names, fluff, it's a mystery trying to figure out what's going on inside your best friend's heads, i use the words sofa and couch interchangeably, written with a chubby reader in mind (smut in later chapters/+18)

a/n: i hope you all enjoy part two!! i'm really excited for you all to read it and i hope you like it!! let me know what you think of this chapter ♡

i talk too much summery: it's terrible when you're in love with your best friend. it's terrible that he's in love with someone else.

<< previous | next >> | masterlist / check out my poll for this chapter!

Having the morning off is great for many reasons, sleeping in, spending time getting ready, maybe meeting with your friends and sleeping in again. Today is one of those days, where you can relax for the morning and not be in a rush to go out the door. You love being a hero but early morning patrols are the bane of your existence, so you start the morning of by waking up late and getting breakfast. Denki's already patrolling right now so you can't spend the morning with him, although lounging about on the sofa sounds like a good idea.

That's when you get a message come through and you know straight away it's from Hanta, he has a custom ringtone on your phone. One night when you both just graduated you went down to the beach together and played each other music until dawn. That was the first time he played you the song heat waves and now you always think of him when you hear it. That night he grabbed your phone and took a photo of you together, before changing his ringtone sound, pressing the record button and using the sound from the speaker. You still use that exact sound now where you can hear the waves and the sound of you laughing in the audio so as you hear the familiar notes of by glass animal and waves you open up your messages. 'Hey you're not patrolling right now, right? You've got the morning off?'

You briefly wonder how he know's your schedule but maybe you mentioned it earlier in the week. 'Yeah, have the whole morning off.'

'Cool, you wanna hang out?'

'Definitely. It'll be so much better than watching day time tv and napping throughout the morning.'

'Don't disrespect day time tv like that.' That gets a laugh out of you before you're arranging somewhere to meet and start getting ready.

You end up in a small cafe not too far a walk from yours, where you see Hanta is already there waiting and sitting at the back where you typically sit. It's not a very well known place as it looks fairly small on the outside but it's looks deceive because the inside is beautifully decorated. You've been told the owners daughter wants to be an artist when she's older, there's pretty little paintings in the corners or the walls and everything about the place just fits. It's delightful and you can't knock the food and drinks either.

Because it's so quiet you're less likely to be recognised which is also a big reason as to why you like this place. Fans coming up to you and asking to take photos or have signatures is part of the job but every hero deserves respite and you in particular are not the most charismatic, just wanting to do hero work and finding all the extra PR stuff boring and tedious. Most of your friends are more accepting to that side of hero work, but you lack the patience and charm for it, maybe Bakugou has rubbed off on you. You're just not good at it.

You are sitting across to one of your friends who is good at it and you're not confused to why. Hanta is one hero that people never have criticism for, he works hard, he's good at hero work, he's outgoing, approachable and magnetic, you're often in awe with him in general and how you have such amazing friends.

"Are you even listening?" You're thoughts get interrupted as you realise Hanta is grinning at you with this all knowing look on his face. Your silence answers him causing him to snicker at you. "Am I boring you or something?" In that moment you wish you were equally as quick-witted as him and be able to say something that would wipe that cheeky grin of his face, but alas you're not.

Sticking your tongue out at him, "yes." he laughs again which causes you to smile, all attention focused back onto him and your conversation. The next few hours are spent in the cafe immersed in one another's company, enjoying your time together. He's been on another failed date and every time there's an entertaining story to go along with it. This time he swears that the women he went on a date with must have been over ten years older than him and the only thing she seemed interested in talking about was gardening.

"I swear it's true! I don't know where Mina finds these girls who she swears are 'perfect for me'." The thought crosses your mind that maybe he should stop going on dates picked by Mina, they never end well but you think not to as the stories always make you laugh and Hanta has never told you throughout all of you knowing him if he even wants a committed relationship or similarly what his type is. For now you'll enjoy listening to his stories and maybe you'll have to ask Kiri at some point if he knows more about it than you. You know he has one night stands, you've seen people leave his flat and people leave with him after nights out at the club but he's never introduced a partner to you. "There's no way that she's our age, she's got to be like 40 AND then the gardening thing. The whole time she was talking about how often you have to water orchids and that you should put ice cubes on them. I'm telling you that just isn't true."

"How do you know it isn't true?" you interrupt, chuckling.

He pauses for a second before replying, "if it is true I don't want to go on a second date with someone who knows that fact." You laugh more, knowing that he is a hundred percent serious and that makes it all the more funnier.

You quickly glance at the clock hanging up on the wall opposite you, you're going to be in serious trouble if you don't get a move on. You've been so engaged talking to Hanta that time flew by. "Shit, I wasn't looking at the time, fuck." You grab your phone and throw it into your bag.

"Patrol?" Sero asks after checking the time.

"Yeah, I'm going to be late if I don't hurry," you respond, as you're getting up, starting to make your way to the door.

He gathers his things and slides his way next to you, "I'll walk with you."

With you walking as fast as you can and Hanta's long limbs you're bound to make it in time. Worrying less, you take a deep breath and remind yourself that you're not going to be late. If it's necessary you'll just get him to swing you there with his quirk.

You're both a couple minutes away from the agency when you're about to be heading your separate ways. You, on your way to the agency to get your hero gear on and Hanta across the road next to the agency to get back home. "See ya, I'll text you after work," you tell Hanta. Before you know what's happening he holds onto your wrist and quickly places a chaste kiss on your lips, "have a good shift, I'll see you soon. Yeah?" He says just as quickly as the kiss and he turns and heads down the road. That's never happened before but processing that can wait until after work.

It didn't wait until after work. During patrol your mind couldn't help but wander. You think maybe it was so fast you could have imagined it, or maybe it's likely that you're overreacting and thinking to much about it. It was just a quick kiss, a peck. Sure, Hanta's never done that before but you've been friends with Mina for years and she's surprised you more than you can count by kissing you quickly, unexpectedly grabbing onto your face making you keep eye contact as she swiftly swoops in and kisses you before saying she's about to leave whatever convention you're at.

Also every Christmas you and Kiri find yourself under the mistletoe together. The first time it happened it was awkward and you felt kind of shy however every Christmas after that it happened without fail, both of you gained confidence and took the kiss in stride and would find the whole ordeal amusing. It would feel strange if you didn't end up under the mistletoe with Kiri one Christmas, that does make it an odd pattern and a weird thing to happen but there are certainly plenty of worse people to be stuck having to kiss every year.

Like having to kiss Mineta, feeling his eyes staring at every inch of your body or Iida whose kiss you know would be to such a level of discomfort you wouldn't be able to look each other in the eye for days when seeing each other again. Or heaven forbid Denki, the man you love but know you can't have, you know that kiss would kill you. Stuck under there, with you feeling like he's being forced to kiss you while wishing it was someone else.

Maybe the kiss is like that, like it is with all your other friends. Simple. Either way it was a great kiss and though it was only a second it was a good second. His lips were soft and smooth and you could smell his pine and sandalwood cologne.

Your patrol feels quicker than normal, with you thinking about Hanta for most of it, either way you're going home and you're going to try not to think about it anymore, it's a waste of brain power. Luckily you remember what you said to Hanta before you left, shooting him a text while walking home saying how your shift was and you thanking him for a lovely morning, you can't remember who paid for drinks so you leave that bit out.

You make it home on time, to you there wasn't a time to make it on but Denki had a time. You and Denki haven't spent a lot of alone time together in the past couple of weeks and you've both noticed. It can't be helped you're both busy with patrols and work different times and different schedules and then when you have had time together it's typically with Kirishima and Sero so it's made him antsy, he misses you. He checked your patrol times for the week and made sure he was free, clearing his schedule for the time you finished work. He wanted to see you and make you dinner, just be with you.

You opened the door and five minutes later dinner would be served. Denki silently congratulates you and himself, even without knowing so your teamwork is impeccable. "I'm home!" You call out like every time. At first you didn't know if Denki was home or not but after a second you heard a clatter of pans and Denki distinctly say 'shit', you giggle before making your way into the kitchen. He must be concentrating pretty hard not to call back as loud as possible like normal.

Before you can even tease him about dropping things and being clumsy Denki turns around with a huge grin, "I'm making your favourite, go sit down." Walking behind him, and peering over his shoulder to see what he was doing exactly, your heart bursts out of chest due to the gesture.

"I can see that Denks. It smells really nice. Is it a special occasion or are you just trying to distract me and butter me up before telling me you broke the toaster again?" You ask half joking and half being genuine.

He laughs before telling you, "no, I just wanted to something nice for you, that's all." You heart warms and you try not to let it show, even though if Denki turned around he would clearly see you bashfully smiling and suddenly finding the floor very interesting looking down. "Go sit down or you're not getting any."

That gets you to move but not before you get a couple of glasses for you both and take them with you, replying a little snarky with, "yes boss." If it was anyone else you might have regretted doing that, people don't always respond well to the mocking or teasing comments you make but you know that Denki doesn't mind. In fact he always finds them humorous, every time getting a smile or chuckle out of him and pretending to be hurt by what you said so he gets you to make up for it in various ways. Even if he'll only be 'hurt' when it's his turn to do the hoovering or when he's feeling particularly tenacious and wants your attention, dragging you along with him to everywhere he needs to be that day.

You're on your way to the couch to sit down, most of the time after work if you're home late you'll eat on the couch, taking comfort over conventional seating but you're reconsidering tonight, it's not everyday you get to eat homemade food especially Denki's. Choosing the table you go over and you see that Denki has already made that decision with the table set. Not only is it set but he's put out your specific cutlery you use, you don't like using the bigger knives, forks and spoons so you have a couple of your own sets, he brought you one one day, you had only one but he brought the second set after moving in together in case the other set hadn't been cleaned yet. There's also glasses already on the table with a couple of options of both your favourite drinks. 'He really did think of everything tonight, huh.'

You sit down and place the glasses you carried to the side table so they won't get in your way as you hear, "foods coming, babydoll". You light up at use of the nickname, it's been a little while since you've heard it. He used to call you it all the time but hasn't for a little while, you would never admit it but you're glad he's called you it again, whenever you hear it you get butterflies.

The food really is delicious, neither of you are particularly good cooks but after you put your mind to something it's fantastic and this food really is. He went through all this for you and you'll love and saviour every bite. Even if it were burnt you'd still love it because of the time Denki put into it, you might've poked fun at him a bit though. You tell him how good it is and how your day has been while he tells you his. "I was kind of distracted during patrol if I'm honest." You say in between bites. "I was still on the top of my game though!" you rush out, tacked on at the end.

"I'm sure you were, you always are but what were you distracted about though?"

"It's nothing. not really."

Denki looks at you, not believing you for a second. "You may think I'll think it's nothing but that's not the case. If it's not nothing to you then it's not nothing to me as well. If you were distracted by something you've got to tell me, I've just made you dinner." He has got you there, it really isn't a big thing so there isn't any harm in telling him.

He's looking at you waiting for you to tell him, he's knows with you it could be anything. Maybe something like a philosophical question that you haven't gotten out of your head or a strange thing you saw while walking down the street, one day you came home rambling about a riddle that had you puzzled.

"I had lunch with Hanta, like I said I did, and before saying bye he kissed me. Like one of those kisses Mina gives everyone or when me and Kiri catch each other under the mistletoe."

He didn't know what he was expecting but it certainly wasn't this. You don't see Denki when you say you kissed Hanta, you're looking down at your plate getting ready to take another bite. You miss Denki's furrowed brows and his deep frown, it doesn't suit him. He tried to school his expression but that didn't stop his mouth moving, "he what?" You look up to see him and there's something about the way he said it that seems familiar. You can't exactly place what's strange about the way he said it or where you've heard him speak like that to you before but you chalk it up to confusion.

"Yeah, he kissed me. It just shocked me that's all, I didn't expect it," you explain.

"No wonder you were distracted during patrol! I can't believe he did that. You'll have to make him apologise." Denki says back automatically like it's the most urgent matter in the world, and to Denki right now it is. He can't believe Sero would just kiss you randomly like that, it's made you uncomfortable. The gall of him to put you in a situation like that!

"It's really not a big thing Denki! He doesn't need to apologise or anything." You give him the biggest smile like it's suppose to be obvious to him, that it's not a big deal but it doesn't stop him from thinking and just as he was about to say something else you start speaking again. "I'm so lucky to have you as my best friend Denki, you always look at for me but I swear this time you don't have to. It's just Hanta. It's not like I want him to apologise, it wasn't bad or anything, it was just surprising." Denki stays silent after that, you know he's protective of you, you just hope that doesn't lead him to talking to hanta about it and getting into an argument with each other.

"Dinner really was lovely Denks, thank you." You reach over to his plate and make your way into the kitchen. Just when you're about to wash up he comes up to you.

"I'll clean up tomorrow." Before you can object and tell him it's only fair for you to do it since he made dinner he's clutching onto your wrist and pulling you out of the kitchen.

"Denki what are you doing?"

"We're sitting down and we are going to watch a film."

"Can't that wait until after I clean up?"

"No." He picks up a blanket as he brings you both on the sofa and hands you the remote. Normally you sit close together or you end up next to one another because you're cold but as soon as you sit down Denki's dragging you next to him so your thighs are touching his and you're leaning against him as he pulls the blanket over you. "Put something good on babydoll."

You clear your throat, "oh, um yeah, I'll pick something now." You flick through what to watch seeing if anything in particular catches your eye. "How about wall-e? It's way better than any of the star wars films."

Denki chuckles and agrees with your pick, "it's still not better than star wars though."

"I beg to differ, it's the best space film there is."

"I don't know about that, hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy exists and there's alien too."

"Hush, wall-e is the best film that's ever been made." He's about to rebuttal but the words die on his tongue as he sees you look up at him pouting.

He pulls you even closer to him, where you're practically laying on his chest, "whatever you say doll." You play the film as you move to get comfier and pull the blanket more so it's covering your whole body.

You watch together as he cracks jokes and asks you questions and your opinions about specific scenes. It's so warm and cosy next to Denki. You can smell the citrus shower gel he uses and the faint dark chocolate smelling fragrance from his cologne that Todoroki gave him one year as secret santa, it was incredibly obvious it was from him, he basically told him. Denki now buys it whenever it runs out, he fell in love with it, he must be on his tenth bottle by now, but you're not entirely sure though.

You hear his breathing and it just all feels right, it's so cosy that halfway through wall-e you've fallen asleep. Denki realises you've fallen asleep nearly instantly by the way you didn't respond to his last joke, he looks at you and see's that your eyes are closed and fluttering occasionally, he wonders what you're dreaming about. Denki holds you tighter, wrapping his arm around your plush waist, making sure that you're comfortable and that you're warm enough. You get cold so easily. He watches the film with you in his arms and he's so thankful that neither of you were busy tonight.

Thinking about being busy he pulls out his phone, careful not to wake you, and reluctantly checks his phone, hoping that nothing important comes up. He sees a few messages from the group chat and a couple sent to him directly but nothing that demands his attention more than tonight with you so he puts his phone back down.

You wake when you feel Denki shoving his phone back in his pocket, blinking your bleary eyes trying to wake up. Hopefully Denki is unaware that you've been asleep but you know that isn't the case as you pretend you've been awake the whole time and he laughs. "I really was awake."

"Sure, I totally believe you."

"It's not my fault, I was relaxed and comfy. Sleep is important."

"Awe, ' you saying I'm cosy?"

"Go away Denki."

He chuckles as the credits roll. "Sleep is important, and that's why i'm telling you to go to bed. It's late and after the best dinner of your life I'm sure you're tired." you giggle but don't disagree or argue. "I know I'm better to sleep on than the bed but you've got to." he grins at you. you wish he wouldn't say things like that, you're tired brain can't help but imagine you asleep on him again, only this time you're in your own bed.

" 'kay i'll go to bed, but my bed is the best to sleep on," you respond tiredly.

"What else have you slept on?"

You ignore this but it still makes a sleepy smile creep on your face, "night Denks."

"Yeah night 'doll."

You waddle into your room and close the door and drift off to sleep thinking about sleeping next to Denki, while Denki's in the kitchen washing up the dishes just in case you wake up before him and do it yourself, he highly doubts that he would sleep in or that you would wake up early, but just in case.

303 notes · View notes

demodraws0606 · 1 year ago

Text

(Theory) Why Levi going to go do the laundry is important and the explanation behind the complexity of the murder

(This is a two part theory because I didn't want to make two posts about it)

After seeing many people theorize on how the murder could've happened (because I'm not really great at that part of a mystery), I've realised something important about Levi's alibi.

He went to do the laundry

As a person who already heavily suspects Levi, I wondered how this alibi was important as it's a useless thing to point out unless it became relevant to the case.

Which then made me think back to Teruko and Charles investigation of the laundry room

The laundry room has cleaning products, Teruko lists some (like bleach) but we can assume it probably has a variety of other products used for cleaning.

Which would be things like detergent or rubbing alchohol

But wait don't you get something when you put bleach and rubbing alcohol together ?

Now we know that the culprit had to have done an extremely complex mechanism to kill Arei considering the crime scene, which is paired with the extremely limited time (7:30 am as we know the letter most likely didn't say 7:30 pm considering the cliffhanger).

If that were the case the murderer wouldn't want Arei to struggle or make the process more difficult because if the mechanism were to be ruined, the culprit's entire plan would fail.

However, I want to get the first conterargument out of the way. That being : "Why would the culprit bind Arei's hand if she is already unconcious ?"

The thing is, the culprit had no certainty that Arei wouldn't wake up halfway through and again if she DID wake up it would ruin their entire plan.

Or it's simply possible that leaving Arei's hand or arms would've gotten in the way if they were just limping around.

Of course there is no strict evidence that chloroform was used, even if Levi is the culprit or not as we don't know if rubbing alchohol is even in the laundry room.

But it is a possibility especially with the evidence of the scuffed ground. If Arei was completely concious during the whole ordeal, wouldn't there have been more scrapes on the floor ? We know that even just rubbing your foot on it would leave visible traces. Even if she was concious and the culprit was just carrying her off the ground, it would still require a lot of strength especially with someone who would be struggling.

Plus we know Arei is known to give cheap kicks, she would absolutely try to attack the culprit's weak spots.

Using chloroform would simply make the murder more efficient and avoid Arei tripping the culprit up.

So that would explain if Levi is the culprit, why he would go to the laundry room.

____________________

Now, let's move on to another burning question that everyone has, even when they think Levi is the culprit. What is the reason behind the method of murder

First, I do want to point out that I'm going with the theory of how the murder happened made by 1moreff-creator as I think that it's so far the theory that makes the most sense (so if you don't know what I'm talking about, go check it out).

However there is one thing that the thread doesn't solve : Why ?

Why would the murder have to be so complicated

The thread mentions that, with the murder method set up this way the culprit could end up avoiding the BDA rule but they do end up dismissing it because it doesn't seem like the culprit would benefit from that.

I mean it would be impossible to predict being one of the first three people to see the body. I mean we see Teruko literally choses the people at random. Plus, either way, Eden and Whit can't be the culprit so wouldn't that make it useless information anyway ?

Now here is the thing, there is actually another reason why the culprit would want to avoid that rule.

And that is to avoid having people being revealed as innocent by the BDA rule, specifically Eden.

Because, think about it, if the murderer was framing Eden, wouldn't the entire plan go into the water if the BDA announcement rule marked her as innocent ?

The killer clearly was betting on Eden being the scapegoat, down to the fake note. Why wouldn't they try to avoid the one thing that could easily make her rid of all suspicion ?

Now, you might argue that it's a very specific thing to do and that it doesn't justify the complexity of the murder but I disagree. I mean we see firsthand how that is a smart idea because Teruko literally thinks of bringing two people with her to activate the BDA (including Eden btw). If the killer thought to avoid that rule then it makes Teruko's strategy fall into the water without having to bet on mother luck to be the first to see the body.

Either way the aim of the culprit is to have someone be voted as a culprit instead of them. Trying to find ways to lessen the methods that proves someone innocent is a very smart thing to do, especially if they are trying to frame someone specifically.

I rest my case

#levi drdt #drdt #danganronpa despair time #levi fontana #eden drdt #eden tobisa #drdt chapter 2 #drdt theory #danganronpa despair time theory #drdt arei #arei nageishi #drdt culprit theory #I apologize to Levi fans #I also like him it's just that I will not let go of him being the chapter 2 culprit #My boy is so sus

98 notes · View notes

edge-oftheworld · 23 days ago

Note

hiii my friend just told me that if I sent you the 5sos member i think I'm most like, and permission to look at my blog you would psychoanalyze me? i thought that might be fun.

I'm not a huge 5sos fan, but I think I'm most like Calum. I think Michael is my favorite.

omg! i saw your dilithium post too and I hope that's going well, senior (?) chemistry can be brutal. and yeah absolutely!

you're naturally curious and easygoing, and you love novelty and diversity and learning about different ways to do things, different ways to exist, until you find something that comfortably fits you and then the peace you feel about that is so much better than trying to conform with what people say you should be. you get bored and start to feel uncomfortable when things are all the same all the time or when the same handful of people are telling everyone else what to do. part of that comes from being in a minority group, but part of it is just who you naturally are and even if you were white, cis and straight you think you'd still be drawn to people who break the mold.

you're drawn to anyone who's unashamedly themselves, and that's not because you're not yourself but sometimes you're quiet and people overlook you, or you're overlooked because you're well behaved according to their standards, but their standards are made up anyway, so who gave them the authority to judge you using things that don't even exist? it's a common aspec experience--people find reasons to judge who people are with, but when you're not with anyone they scramble for reasons to accuse you of wrongdoing, only to find none and infantilise you instead, focusing instead on the things you're good at, calling you 'career oriented' for not having a partner, not realising that binary is just as false as everything else.

there are things you're good at that you don't really care for, and things you love that you could be good at, and probably will be because you love them, so you're automatically going to spend more time on them. it's common sense, you don't understand why people don't get it.

you're observant and you notice a lot of trends as well as the ways that the world COULD be if people didn't just go through the same motions that this colonial society recommends. you're a dreamer and an idealist. you love philosophy, but only to a point, when it stops having practical applications it starts to go over your head sometimes because when it does that, it stops opening the doors to building community and family and instead starts to feel exclusionary, like that age-old trolley argument that totally disregards ANY sort of creativity and creates a false binary, something you hate.

your curiosity and love for complexity is one reason you're studying chemistry, and you're in so many fandoms! don't let people take that away from you: these things can be wonderous and joyful and you can look at ionic and covalent bonds and think to yourself: I'm most drawn to people who some say are opposite to me (loud, sometimes 'rude' but who makes these social rules anyway) but in other ways are exactly the same. lithium and oxygen are opposites, or are they? how about sodium and chlorine? aren't they more alike than you think? you don't appear like an outcast on the surface but you're committed to authenticity and you're going to go wherever that is, and it sure isn't with the mainstream people trying to hide their whole selves to be cool. they'll learn eventually. you already have.

#fandom group therapy or some shit #malum lane #(but with more nuance than that)#dilithium oxide #i've got a lewis dot diagram of that if you're struggling too? like i saw it and was like 'hey i wonder if i remember how to do this'#then thought it'd be a dick move to put it here so i'll let you ask if you want it. but i'm not your teacher don't wanna confuse you #that's interesting you know that much about them without being a massive fan! you must love your friend #philosophy and chemistry both make a cameo appearance

12 notes · View notes

cannibalovers · 10 months ago

Text

since some ppl did say yes, buckle up for a VERY long analysis because this song and "want" + a few others are some of my ultimate hannibal songs.

Hannibal song of the day: song no.1

a bit about the song:

"Missing Piece" (released in 1997) is a song by Recoil, a music project by Alan Wilder (former member of Depeche Mode, a group which I absolutely love and have a lot of their songs in my playlist). The song was written and sang as a duo by Alan Wilder and Siobhan Lynch. It's a moody and dark electronica song with jazzy elements and even a violin solo In short, the song is about self discovery and enlightement that a relationship has brought to the narrator, who has felt alone and misunderstood their whole life until they met the person who was their "missing piece". It explores the complex emotions and realisations that arose from the relationship(whether the relationship ended or not isn't really implied, at least in my eyes, although for my view on the song when it comes to hannibal, i think it might have).

now, i think from that it's already clear enough that I'm thinking about hannigram for this. I mean c'mon, a narrator that felt misunderstood and has been afraid to fully opening up to anybody, because of it's risks, even though they have so much love to give. That's literally Hannibal.

Although I feel like the narrator can also be Will but with how open and desparate the narrator seems, I keep thinking of Hannibal.

------------------------------

Verse 1

"I wanna write myself

On the walls of your heart

Because the knot that holds us

Altogether throws us all apart

I'm gonna stop myself

Before I say something true

Because the answers

That roll from my tongue

Are nothing to do with you"

Hannibal loves to impact people (literally manipulates them), even though it doesn't last (usually).

Through the show, we can see just how many people he actually changed, changing their mindsets, convincing them to murder etc. that's more leaving an impact on their brain, but with Will, he's different. He indeed does change his mindset but he also really tries to get a place in Will's heart and get his attention because, as he confessed to Bedelia, Will intrigues him. I think the lyrics of the narrator wanting to write themselves on the walls of somebody's heart and leave an impact on them is just so incredibly hannibal.

But again, those people don't last usually, they usually end up dead, be it as Hannibal's dinner or something else. He knows this danger, and he knows this complicated knot of manipulation and lies he tied himself and Will with will most likely break off at some point, which he slowly comes to realise he doesn't want it to happen. (and then fucking mizumono happens)

In the song, the narrator hides the truth, most likely because of the fear of rejection, fearing the person doesn't feel the same, or because of the fear of losing the person. In season 2, his decision was to continue lying, not confessing the truth of his plan to Will, in my eyes to try and secure him in his hold, get his trust and love, see if Will would truly understand him and accept him for who he is - so, he stops himself from telling Will the truth, pretending his plan, his answers have nothing to do with his love for Will, but instead pretend that his plan is to destroy Will's life, leaving out the part where he's hoping Will would want to try and rebuild his life with Hannibal.

------------------------------

Chorus

"(And) I hold a piece up to the light

Hold a piece up to my eye

Found a missing piece from my set

Found a person I'd not met (x2)

Sometimes is a lonely place (x5)"

self explanatory. There's so little to say, because the lyrics describe it so well, yet at the same time there's SO much to say.

The chorus is sung as a duo, both the narrator and the narrator's person. They both feel like they're the same and are each other's missing pieces, harmonising together.

I truly thing the best way to describe hannigram's relationship is by saying that they're each other's missing pieces. Hannibal seems to be a well-organized set of his pieces that make up him as well as a set of other people that he manipulated kind of as a list (maybe some as trophies). He's so composed, he's sure of his values and knows who he is, he's fully in control yet still felt incomplete, so he has spent his whole life finding that last missing piece (perhaps another meaning for missing, maybe he already had one and lost it, the missing piece being his sister........ ouch, although can't give much thought to this cuz haven't seen season 3 yet), a person who will be just like him and will complete him, not judge him, see him, accept him and be with him. That piece is Will.

He holds him up to the light, analyses him, studies him, gets to know him to determine if he is indeed the missing piece (in the show, he does his usual tactic of manipulating with the intention of making him his dinner but the more he got to know him, the more intrigued he got and saw a possibility of Will understanding him), and he indeed is his missing piece.

The fact that the narrator's person only sings during the chorus makes me think of how Hannibal made Will realise that he is Hannibal's missing piece and that although Will didn't really want it to be true, Hannibal helped him realise that Hannibal is Will's missing piece too - That's why I see the narrator as Hannibal and narrator's person as Will. He seems to be the second to realise this and accept this.

"Sometimes is a lonely place" is straightforward, I think. The two literally admit and show that they feel alone without each other, they have never felt so true to themselves as they feel when they're together, a room or a moment in life without one another is empty, a period without each other is a period they feel the most lonely.

------------------------------

Verse 2

"So tow me over to the light

The sound, the sound it is in sight

Found my heart was contained within a cell

Found my heart in this tuck-a-way-me world"

ngl, verse 2 and chorus are quite similar in meaning to me. Maybe it's more so Hannibal letting Will study him as well and get to know him, letting Will tow him over to the light (let Will inside his mind). I feel like the lyrics about the narrator's heart being contained in a cell is maybe Hannibal becoming more and more aware of how restrictive he was with his emotions, how his human suit made him lock away his real heart and after many tries of trying to find the right key, Will finally found it and unlocked Hannibal's true self to the world. Overall, I feel like Hannibal feels the world is very restrictive for his type of people but he has found a way to live with it and accept it, although the desire to find a person like him never disappeared

------------------------------

Coda

"Sometimes I held the missing piece

I held the missing piece

I held sometimes

I held the missing piece

I held..."

the end seems very lamentful to me. Sorry but it reminds me of mizumono

the end is overall so beautiful, I love how dark, slow yet jazzy and classy the song sounds, the coda just sounds like absolute heaven to me and its instrumental reminds me of the show overall so so much

but anyhow, the lyrics getting repeated, the moody, whiny tone the narrator sings it in combined with the reverb and minor key just immediately makes me think that the narrator lost their missing piece, reminiscing the times they had with them. Because of that, I immediately think of Mizumono and how distraught Hannibal was when he realised that Will betrayed him, letting Will see him just for Will to try and get him killed, even though he had a plan of giving back Will everything that he lost and everything that was precious to him. The whole song sounding quite blurry makes me think of how much emptiness Hannibal probably felt after the events in mizumono, how much of a blur everything was to him.

in conclusion, the song is literally so hannibal lecter coded to me

------------------------------

additional notes: i already mentioned this song on my previous blog actually, together with "want" cuz together theyre AMAZING, i see want more from Wills perspective, i'll do that one tmr

could be lacking a little bit cuz i havent seen season 3 yet, maybe after it ill have some more thoughts but wont add them, i leave it at that

------------------------------

my playlist

to anybody who read this, thank you and hope you enjoyed my rant<3

27 notes · View notes