#it's a screwed up story and it is horrifically sad

[jobrker]

as much as sondheim claimed that sweeney todd is just a silly little time, it's actually an absolutely devastating tragedy and the fact that this isn't widely discussed is an insult

[cosyvelvetorchid]

It’s 4am in the uk so I’m heading to bed in a sec but I wanted to say one final thing.

I’m not angry Buck and Tommy broke up. It’s a TV show and break ups are part and parcel of that. I’ve loved Buck and Tommy always with the understanding that a break up could happen—we never knew. I’m simply sad and disappointed.

What I am angry at, however, is how it was written. How such a big deal was made about it, such a big build up, so much time and energy they invested in this story, all the talk of pride in representing the community.. all for it to be thrown away suddenly.

All the talk of being off the hamster wheel to be given the same old same old Buck relationship woes.

All the talk from Oliver about playing this bi character right, how he always spoke about bucks discovery of himself with such reverence, for him to turn around and say he wants Buck to screw around like the opening scene in the wedding crashers?

I’m angry at the way this queer story was handled in the end. I’m disappointed in Oliver after all the talk he’s given about caring about the community he’s representing and I’m sad for Lou for having to endure almost a year of harassment and horrific shit thrown at him, and still giving his job his all only for him to be dropped on whim.

It was rushed and sudden and handled badly.

[dailycass-cain]

Spirit World #6 concluded the series this past week. Did it end on a high note? How was Cass within it? Well, all answers will be found here...

I love that this series fills the final gaps of questions I have for certain characters in the series. Namely, Wan Yujing's motivations, WHY the Jade Court are so meh due to Po Po's warnings back in #4. and how this ALL ties into the origins of Xanthe Zhou.

But like poetry, it also ties into Cass as into what she was going through in #1. Said issue, Cass was lost, but also feeling awful in helping slay a creature (even dark) and it took a slight toll on her.

Here in #6, it all circles back.

Seeing why Wan's desperation. Seeing the souls she's trapped. Seeing the Jade Court's inability to "want" to save the situation. All it ties into this isn't a simple solution of just slaying the demon.

But this doesn't just tie into Cass, but also the series' central character Xanthe. We get their full origin here. The mystery all pulled back and the scope of their powers revealed.

Writer Alyssa Wong sprinkled teases of Xanthe's origins throughout, and here they are on full display. You can also see why they keep company with John Constantine but also now open themselves to Cassandra Cain.

Why these characters just gell so nicely to each other complimenting it all. With how Xanthe finds the way to end this all.

For now at least.

The ramifications of this issue interestingly bring up new ideas for the DCU at large. Both in the mystical portion and well in Cass (more on that soon).

I find the whole mystical area of DC fascinating because they aren't just bound to one corner. Each magical user always brings something new to the table. Xanthe Zhou is just another character that I hope more tales are showcased with the character going forward.

The fact that well, not everything is tied up at the end leaves me to think that Wong has still so many more stories to tell of Xanthe and Spirit World itself. We've only touched the first layer of that.

To that, I hope allows the creative team to return and tell more tales.

The artist for the series, Haining has been exceptional with the various designs and actions throughout. Like I'm still in awe of the designs used or even how horrific Wan's demonic can be but Haining brings a level of cracks of her humanity through the body horror drawn.

That's not even bringing up the fluidity to the action we've seen throughout the series.

Every bit of the creative team brought their A-game to the table in telling something truly unique. Like I really want more.

And you get that there MIGHT be more.

Clearly, Wong lays seeds at the end of the Verdant Sorcess not at all pleased with the new status quo of Spirit World going forward.

I'm REALLY curious about their origins now with the reveal of the prior ones.

Not only that but in the case of Cass, only one of her subplots is resolved in the series. I mean yeah it's the big one: she gets to go back home.

But the "missing" time of her being in Spirit World (due to Batgirl Vol. 1 #72)? Why incident is all screwed (Shiva never killed Cass in that particular issue)? What new memories Cass lost in #3? Was Shen posing as Steph?

It feels like Wan found her, that while she was absorbing Cass, THAT's when Shiva brought her back. But it still doesn't answer fully what occurred with Cass during that lost time?

These are riddles still left unanswered, and it can't be coincidental given what next year being. So hopefully maybe THEN they are.

Please let Alyssa Wong cook DC!

Wong truly has an amazing grasp on the character and is the first to really bridge the lingering cracks Batgirl Vol. 1 left and bring it into this modern era.

Regardless, Spirit World was an exceptional series. It was something I truly needed to wash the sadness of Batgirls ending and another event douring the characterization of Cass.

I really hope DC goes all out in collecting this series. Show us all the Haining concept art.

Give me some words by Wong on how this series came to be. How they developed Xanthe Zhou. Give me it all!

.....

I've become Shen. My greed knows no bounds. 😅

Anyway, to those who haven't read this series. You now have the full excuse to read it all in one sitting. It's even BETTER when you do that actually. To those who read it like me keep hyping this and the other new minis DC created this year.

We need more of this!

[jacquelinemerritt]

The Fascinating Minor Characters of Twilight

Originally posted on November 2nd, 2015

Screw Edward and Bella, these characters are actually interesting.

So, it’s 2015, which means that statistically, you’ve both heard of Stephanie Meyer’s Twilight series and the opinions of the incredibly vocal critics of the series. And to be sure, there is a lot to criticize about this novel series; Edward is creepy, Bella is boring, the story plays into sexist tropes and stereotypes, and there’s nothing particularly interesting about the series’ story unless you’re a teenager who buys into Meyer’s unhealthy vision of romance.

Except, that last point isn’t entirely true. See, Twilight is actually filled with some downright fascinating characters, whose existence bring up questions of the nature of violence, what love means in a hopeless context, and how limiting oneself can bring peace. I’m, of course, referring to one of her minor characters specifically, and the one character that these questions come through is Jasper.

A little background first: Jasper is part of the Cullen family, but unlike most of the family, he wasn’t turned by Carlisle. He was turned by Maria, a vampire he met while serving as a Major in the Confederate Army, and developed a psychic empathy, or the ability to feel other people’s emotions, upon turning. After a while, he turned on Maria, and fled north, where he eventually met Alice, whose visions led the both of them to the Cullen family.

Now, the concept of a Confederate Major being turned into a vampire is pretty damn cool on its own, but what’s particularly interesting about Jasper beyond that is the way his character arc relates to those three questions I mentioned above. First, his psychic empathy gives him the ability to feel and control every emotion the people around him feel, and as a result, he’s forced to deal with the true nature of violence and killing. Every single time he takes someone else’s life, he is forced to share in their fear, and forced to confront the horrific nature of the violent acts he commits. Of course, to his knowledge, he can’t stop killing, as there is no other way to feed, and so he is driven into a state of depression and hopelessness, until he meets Alice.

Alice is the first person to give Jasper hope. Her plucky and optimistic demeanor inspires him, and he falls in love with her, despite his hopeless situation*. She then shows him that he can survive off animal blood, giving him the ability to end his violent ways and become more peaceful.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that Japser becomes perfect, and we see in New Moon that he has to control his bloodlust more carefully than the rest of the Cullen family, as the sight of blood can still set him into a frenzy if he hasn’t fed in a while.

Of course, none of this comes through in the forefront of Meyer’s story; they’re only mentioned in passing when Jasper relays his story to Bella in Eclipse. But they are there regardless, and the fact that this interesting of a story is located in Twilight speaks to the unrealized potential of Meyer’s world.

After all, can you imagine a novel or film focused on the story of a Confederate vampire forced to experience the pain of everyone he kills? I sure can, and it makes me wish Meyer had had the sense to see how much more interesting Jasper’s story is when compared to anything that happens to Bella or Edward.

*I’m aware that this falls into the harmful stereotype of the “manic pixie dream girl” bringing “sad and depressed guy” out of a slump with her quirky happiness, and I find it just as problematic here as anywhere else.

[ogdoadfates]

It was only a cough: #5 Silvery barbs

Here it is! I’m not the best at writing Pike I think but I gave it a shot! Like always here’s a link to the story on ao3!

Vax is, Vax is a lot of things, he’s scared because the woman he loves is sick, he’s traumatized by both his past and the hellish present they all find themselves in, he’s revolted by the stench the undead has left on everything, he’s worried for their friends who aren’t traveling with them, but right now the most prominent thing that he is, is a horrific mixture of anger and terrified. The emotions coil around his beating heart in a desperate attempt to make it burst and release the carnage that is what’s become of his mental state onto the floor. He wants to scream, he wants to rage, he wants to punch whoever controls fate in the face for the hand they all have been dealt.

It was just a simple sentence, one singular sentence that spilled from his twin’s lips like a viper peeking its head out of its den, prepared to strike and kill whomever disturbed it.

“We’re going to have to stop at the next hospital.” That one fuckin sentence destroyed most of the slivers of whatever sanity Vax had left.

Keyleth has been getting slightly better but Vax didn’t know how low their med supplies had gotten. And god does that anger him, he was a damn EMT for fucks sake not to mention his girlfriends health is historically horrendous he SHOULD be the one keeping track of that the most and yet he let his mind slip.

They have to go to a hospital.

His reaction to that news wasn’t the best , the only regret with that is that now Keyleth is even more stressed then she already was. To be fair he wasn’t the only one to react in outrage and fear to the notion of scavenging a hospital, Scanlan’s words spoke true about all the dangers involved but neither of them could fight on it when Vex and Pike pointed out they’d be doomed if they didn’t refill on meds. Even Vax had to acknowledge that they’d die like wildlife in an oil spill if they got sick without meds and that Keyleth would be the first to go.

He’s worrying Keyleth but he can’t bring himself to do anything about it and it sickens him. He’s sitting on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands as she tiredly drapes herself onto his back, rubbing his arms lightly in a comforting gesture.

Keyleth’s sicker than Trinket after he eats a chocolate bar and yet she’s the one trying to give some comfort. He can feel the rattle of her ribcage when she turns her head away from him to cough into the empty space and all it does is tell him how screwed they are.

After a particularly harrowing coughing fit from Kiki, he takes his hands away from his face, grabbing her hands lightly.

“You should rest, Keeks.” He says softly yet, try as he might, he can not mask the stressed undertone his words take. She huffs and the next thing Vax knew he was being pulled down onto the bed. Vax’s eyes widen at the short and sudden display of strength from Keyleth as she now looms over him with a sad expression on her face.

“I’ve done nothing but rest for two days now, I’m not going to sleep if it leaves you stewing in misery alone.” She says with as much conviction her hoarse voice will allow. The two stare into each other's eyes for a moment then, taking in the silent words between them.

The fear, the anxiety, the uncertainty and the underlying care and love that despite all the struggles the world has been hurling at them has done nothing but bloom. Like a garden overtaking a mass grave, they struggle but have found a beauty to overcome the grotesque death surrounding them.

Keyleth sighs, and collapses onto the bed facing Vax. She reaches up to take his hand, the angle making it a little awkward but like always they make it work.

“I’m sorry.” She says it barely above a whisper but he still catches it. Vax’s face contorts into one of confusion.

“What for?” He says back. She looks at him for a moment before averting her gaze, he can see her expression morph to one of deep conflict and dismay.

Suddenly it hits him.

Oh, Keyleth.

“It’s not your fault, Kiki. Most likely we would have had to stop at one sooner or later considering we only had basically a week or so’s worth of them.” He says as he rearranges himself on the bed to properly face, never letting their hands part as he does. Vax takes his unoccupied hand to cup the side of Keyleth’s face lovingly, as their gazes finally meet again his heart breaks at the burning fires of her committed self hatred dancing in her eyes like sick vipers of flame dancing in rage within a wooden crate.

“I’d agree if I most likely wasn’t the cause as to why we had so little medicine to begin with. I feel so useless.” She sighs but huddles closer to him, Vax now wrapping his arms around her.

“You’re not useless, Keyleth. We’d be lost without you. Who the hell would have been able to get the keys to the van after they fell through floor boards of that farm house? Who’d have come up with the idea to use email to safely keep in contact with everyone? Who the hell would have remembered the way to Zephrah?” He tells her with conviction as she holds onto him tighter with each word that makes its way out of him. “I couldn’t do this without you. I can’t do this without you.”

At that statement she buries her face into his neck, he can feel the wetness her tears leave.

It’s a while before they move again, Keyleth refusing to rest, regardless of Vax’s pleas, is standing near the window peeking through the small opening in the curtains as Vax watches her from his spot sitting on the bed.

Minxie hops onto the bed curling up next to Vax’s leg and he can’t help but smile at the calming creature. He can’t help but remember when all of this started, the feline wasn’t particularly happy about have to get into their crate to go to the vet so Vax had volunteered to help Keyleth get the feisty feline until they suddenly heard a crash and the next thing he knew everyone was screaming. Gods is he lucky he had been the one holding the carrier so his first thought was to look out the window to see what was happening instead of just rushing down to help.

He’ll never forget seeing the undead tear that man apart, limb from limb like a clan of hyenas devouring a bloated carcass. The sounds and fear radiating off of everything sprung him and Keyleth to action, grabbing anything they could and getting the hell out of there while he called his sister. From there it was a blur, getting into Percy's car with the rest of the gang and high tailing it away.

They were aimless for a while till they were far enough away that they could stop for a minute and call people, that's when they learned the undead hadn’t hit Zephrah or Whitestone yet but both places were getting rapidly colder. At first they thought that meant they needed to head south, run from the cold, but Keyleth quickly corrected them. Better to deal with the cold in places with protections against it rather than places that aren’t.

He still can’t see how she thinks herself useless, she probably has saved the entirety of both Whitestone and Zephrah with her explanations and helping Cassandra and Korrin on how to keep the cities safe in frigid temperatures.

She’s done so much and yet the world only wishes to punish her.

Pike’s been watching Scanlan pace for the past few hours, the anxiety and frustration wafting from him in agonizing waves. Grog had been with them for the first two hours but decided to go on patrol when it started to reach the third.

She can’t blame Scanlan for not being particularly happy at the news that they had to scavenge a hospital for meds, he made a promise to his daughter at the beginning of all of this that he’d see her again whether it was crossing paths during travel or when they reached either Whitestone or Zephrah.

Hospitals are nowadays death traps, she’d know better than anyone how dangerous they are. She idly rubs her fingers over the scar that lay upon her eyebrow. And now they had no choice but to venture into one, otherwise they’re probability for survival is basically zero.

As light starts to dim, Pike begins to ever so slightly shiver. She should probably go inside but she isn’t going to leave Scanlan out here alone. Hopefully they snag some blankets from this motel and that they’ll fit in the van, Keyleth hadn’t been exaggerating about how it’s getting colder and apparently it’s only going to get worse.

“Scanlan?” She calls out causing him to stop abruptly and snap at her.

“What!” Scanlan shouts, Pike flinches slightly at his tone and volume causing him to shrink back, head down, shoulders up. “Sorry.”  The two of them take a moment to see if his shout attracted any attention but it’s starting to seem as if they did actually kill everything in the area.

“We need to get inside.” She says walking over to him, he refuses to meet her eyes but gives a small nod. He lets her take his hand and leads him back inside where they find Grog sitting down on one of the waiting chairs, giving a happy Trinket some much appreciated scratches. “Hey, buddies.” She greets him with a small smile, Grog looks up from Trinket and she knows he heard Scanlan shout but can also tell he shouldn’t say anything about it so he just greets her back and goes back to paying attention to the large dog in front of him.

Pike takes Scanlan to one of the rooms the group has been using during their stay here that’s empty. Where Scanlan proceeds to collapse onto one of the beds and stare up at the ceiling.

The lack of jokes about them being alone in a bedroom together really pressed on how much everything is bugging him and in a way unsettles Pike. She’s gotten so used to him being one of the people who lighten the mood that she sometimes forgets he’s in this hell hole too.

She lays down next to him, not close enough to be touching but close enough to feel the other's presence.

“Are we doomed to die?” The question startles Pike, she doesn’t answer immediately, having to gather her thoughts.

“I don’t think we’re doomed to die, I mean we’ve made it this far? And we haven’t lost anyone yet!” She says but even she’d admit that her tone even with her trying isn’t the most convincing but hopefully the facts made some progress into relieving some of Scanlan’s stress.

Scanlan huffs and turns to face her. “We’re going to a literal kill box soon and yeah sure, I won’t be one of the people entering it most likely but if you all die in there, it’d just be me and Keyleth who. Gods she is a good friend but if everyone goes she’d go into shock and either die from an accident or from some random ass sickness, I’d probably die not that long after.” Pike’s eyes widened at his words, she reached over and grabbed his shoulder.

“Scanlan we aren’t going to die in the damn hospital, yes we need supplies but we also know when it’s time to retreat. I think out of everyone, I’d be the one to know that. We’ll be fine, you’ll be fine, you’ll see your daughter again Scanlan. Yes we should be cautious, maybe even a little scared but there isn’t a point in dwindling in what if.” Her voice rings with conviction as she stares Scanlan down. “We will live.”

He stares at her for a long while, particularly the scar marking her brow like some sort of unholy marker of what's before them,he gives her a nod. “Alright, alright.” She smiles and gives his shoulder a light playful push before a smirk slowly makes its way onto his face. “You know, we are alone.” He says with a playful rise of his eyebrows. There it is!

Pike groans and shoves his shoulder enough to where he falls off the bed with a loud thump, yet she can’t help but let a little blush and smile come to her face. Gods, I need a break.

[420thewritersroom]

Hello, I'm CelestiaShipp on Ao3 (and I'm also tatyfer, I have two accounts, one for pure shipping and the other is pure friendship and family) I'm curious about Raiden's harem since I'm curious about who makes it up (although I imagine Liu and Lao They are one of the members) and I'm sorry if I'm screwing too much

Yeah, so I have a reoccurring thing with characters and harems lmao. Before, it was my OCs where I (intentionally or unintentionally) would put them in harem like situations, but now it seems like even Raiden isn't safe from the "everyone wants to kissy you" squad

Also this got exceptionally long, so my answer is under this READMORE bracket

Yeah, Liu Kang and Kung Lao are obviously in the harem, especially in the context of the "Oops, Kung Lao's Dead Again" AU. Kung Lao is self explanatory, a classic "Childhood Friends to Lovers" trope, and I actually have a bit of a sad story between the pair that explains their eventual friendship, but I wanna save that for the next part of the series (so no spoilers!)

Liu Kang, as demonstrated in the most RECENT chapter is the "unrequited love/never meant to be" trope. When LORD Raiden rejected Liu Kang's love for him, Liu tried to move on from that chapter in his life. And when he became Fire God Liu Kang AND Keeper of Time, he almost wanted to recreate events so that Raiden could still be the god of thunder and they both could protect Earthrealm...And MAYBE spark a relationship together. But Liu Kang saw that this idea was a selfish one and reasonably thought that it also violates the one thing he still wanted to present every mortal and being in his new ear, the ability to choose their destiny. And forcing this new Raiden into a life where he's (technically, but not really) forced into a relationship with Liu defeats that purpose.

So instead, Liu Kang directs his love for Raiden by having this new Raiden have the life that he lost and would've wanted. A family, a loving mentor, a best friend (and soon to be bf), and a home. Even if Liu Kang couldn't make Raiden emotionally or physically happy, he gave Raiden a life where he was happy regardless, and that makes Liu Kang happy...At least he thinks it does.

Yo, listen, I just love possessive Liu Kang, especially if it's "slowly growing possessively feral, but is trying SO HARD to hide it". If you want a (albeit narsty ;) ) example of this, I highly recommend this fic series here (Earthrealm Poly)

Johnny and Kenshi don't really fit in the harem, but I'm still including them anyways because they both have a deep care for their friend.

Now, hear me out...The Lin Kuei brothers. Lemme explain. I like to imagine that out of all the Earthrealm warriors, Raiden is the one that came out alright as Liu Kang intended (perks of being gods favorite princess). Raiden didn't become orphaned, loose a parent or family member horrifically, didn't grow up in a dysfunctional household, didn't loose their hometown, just had a well-rounded life that was trauma free compared to the rest of the warriors (including Kung Lao).

And I like to think that Raiden's peaceful life and kind personality is what lured the Lin Kuei brothers to Raiden (along with everyone else too. Raiden stays not having enemies). The first time each of them realized that they liked Raiden was when he invited them (along with his other friends) to join him and his family for dinner one time. Just being surrounded by the good vibes that Raiden possessed just caused these feral men to go "Yep, I'm gonna wife that man up."

Bi-Han is obviously the tsundere type, and before he betrayed everyone (and listen, I got a lot of beef about that that I will not get into), I like to think that Bi-Han saw potential in Raiden much like Liu Kang did. But I think that Liu Kang and Subzero, without even knowing it, would've been strangely...Territorial about Raiden, if that makes sense lol.

There's more I could probably say, but I'm having a hard time expressing who else would be part of the harem. To kinda shot ball some things. As much as I don't like the (imo) forced relationship that netherrealm attempted with Kitana and Raiden (especially since they're trying to give Raiden the Liu Kang treatment with this new timelines), I'm also not opposed to it either. One, everyone likes a good "small town hero falling for a warrior princess" type thing, and maybe I'd be more into it if Kitana was taller than Raiden (I'm a "Outworlder women are tall" believer).

This is more crack than anything, but General Shao being part of the harem...Ok, this option is really just horny me speaking lol

[blackfeatherdragon]

Screw it, song picks for the Bakurae.

Ryou Bakura:

-Fight Song, by Rachel Platten

I'm losing friends and I'm chasing sleep/Everybody's worried about me/I'm in too deep/I said I'm in too deep

I think Fight Song matches his general refusal to give up despite everything that happened to him. We don't get to see him fight back against the spirit much in canon, but when we do see him push back, he pushes. Also that line above? Fits how he was before transferring to Domino High, when he didn't know why his friends kept going comatose or why he kept losing time.

-Elk Tour Suite Pt. 5, from Centaurworld

You can't keep the ghosts out/when you're the one who's the haunted house/And you can't kick the ghosts out/when you're the one who let them in

My one dip into Sad Boi Ryou Bakura. Ryou deliberately surrounds himself with ghosts, whether it's the spirit of the Ring or the dead sister he writes to, and he can't easily kick them out.

-Wings of Time, by Tame Impala

Do you see the wings of time?/Do you feel a sense of pride now?/Do you know you'll never fly alone?/We did it right this time

So. This song. It's a post canon song if I ever heard one. It reflects how Ryou finally has friends and doesn't have to be alone anymore, it reflects how Yu-Gi-Oh is a cyclical story where the friendship gang finally finished what was started in Ancient Egypt several thousand years ago.

Also this song was used as the credits song for the DnD movie and I think that's highly thematic for Ryou.

Yami Bakura:

-Wolf in Sheep's Clothing, by Set it Off

Aware, aware, you stalk your prey /With criminal mentality /You sink your teeth into the people you depend on /Infecting everyone, you're quite the problem

Wolf in Sheep's Clothing could very easily be a TKB song with its lyrics about grudges and revenge, but I think there's an unhingedness that matches Yami Bakura better. YB is partially TKB, yes, but he's also partially Zorc and there's no real separating the two anymore.

Also Yami Bakura is quite literally a wolf in sheep's clothing if you take Ryou as the 'sheep' he's wearing.

Thief King Bakura

-Emperor's New Clothes, by Panic! at the Disco

If it feels good, tastes good /It must be mine /Dynasty decapitated /You just might see a ghost tonight

TKB takes what he wants from the tombs he robs as the self proclaimed Thief King, and he wants revenge against the Egyptian monarchy for what happened to Kul Elna.

-Hell's Comin' With Me, by Poor Man's Poison

I am the righteous hand of God /And I am the devil that you forgot /And I told you one day you will see /That I'll be back, I guarantee /And that hell's coming, hell's coming /Hell, hell's coming with me

This song is a story of someone who is horrifically wronged and comes back later to seek revenge, much like TKB coming back for revenge against the monarchy.

TKB is both the 'righteous hand of God' and 'the devil that they forgot' and that's reflected in his divinelike Ka Diabound and how the Scales couldn't tell if he was good or evil.

[saltintheseaa]

miscellaneous thoughts on the sparrow

- some parts of the book were genuinely hilarious. “he loved god but found rough sex… gratifying.” iconic sentence

- also the priests’ realization. how every single one of them assumed emilio fucked up. emilio betrayed god. their reactions when they realize that god was the actual betrayer are kinda hilarious, and so is emilio’s reaction to their reaction. like they fucked up. they fucked up sooooo bad. honestly he could have been a lot more ruthless towards them. they got off so easy.

- “are you not concerned to be in the bedroom of someone so… notorious?” also iconic. assuming the position of christ for an ironic “seduction.” no one is doing it like him.

- the only book i’ve read that contains more pain than the sparrow is fernanda melchor’s hurricane season which if you’ve ever read that book is saying a lot.

- i mean there really is something darkly hilarious about how much pain he was subjected to. i think his accidental murder of askama was a bit contrived. but the shock value is certainly effective.

- the passage when he meets hlavin is absolutely horrific. you have to wonder how much of his initial joy at the situation is his mind frantically trying to deny what’s about to happen to him. one of the worst things i ever read. in a good way.

- i also found anne edwards deeply irritating and was not at all surprised to discover she was modeled on russell herself. her attempts at intellectual humour r so grating. in general the found family was just unconvincing to me for some reason. none of them seemed like real people except emilio, none of their attachments to each other were believable; i wasn’t that sad when they died

- i cannot help but compare this to the left hand of darkness and monster! ofc! i mean it’s kinda the antithesis of those two stories bc in those tales the protsgonists’ efforts to carry out their moral principles is ultimately rewarded, though not without sacrifice. and in the sparrow it’s the complete opposite. u could argue the history of catholicism is ultimately what screws over sandoz— bc he was acting on unstable foundations in the first place.

- he faces the same dilemma as tenma and both are messianic figures but the outcome is different bc tenma isn’t subscribing to a larger set of dubiously moral principles but his own convictions- and genly ai succeeds bc he’s able to do what sandoz/russell couldn’t which is learn to approach the alien culture on their own terms. and he learns how to do that through understanding daoist principles— so different from christian ones

like yes the alien world building is pretty shallow but nothing can compare to le guin so yah. i am being unfair. but when such an essential part of the plot hinges on that alien culture u have to go deeper than “wow! cat people utopia!” like ik the big revelations about the jana’ata and the runa were meant to be shocking and meant to make the reader question their preconceived notions of society and morality but so much of sci fi has explored this notion better. again, le guin. the dispossessed and four ways to forgiveness did it soooo much better

and then in the end they’re like “let’s send yet another mission to run interference because apparently we didn’t wreak enough havoc the first time.” like omg. you idiots.

- do i ascribe emilio’s failure to russell’s colonialist writing or his own ignorance? so hard to say— i mean the narrative is pretty ambiguous on whether it was the missionaries’ fault or god’s fault. but it doesn’t touch on their most essential mistake which was assuming that they knew better than the natives

it’s always the messianic figures that get me, istg!!

[the-firebird69]

Freddie Mercury And Boy George #shorts

They got a lot of trouble what you said is not true but you told them it was a surrounded but not compromised and it's true and they're saying wherever they sort of new and these guys are brothers but the boy George is a hermaphrodite. They're friends and they're kind of friends with our son and didn't say it they're very sad a lot they knew he's helping and thought it was great but we're still sad because they were getting hurt and he said one day they plan to get rid of all of them too and they knew it and they hated it that says what do you think about it I think the ostracized their own and they're filthy animals and it's just going to go down to nobody and they force it on people and they make people evil and separate them and continue a cycle if they lose and they got really angry and say this really gross and it made it more sad but he says it shouldn't be too sad because we're the champions and we're going to stop them no matter what happens and they said good they feel better about it one day you said we're going to stop him now and then start working and it was great it just means something is symbolic it means that the hermaphrodite boy George is the computer and Dave has a serious Captain's uniform on even though it's not full dress and that's because he's not awake they're pushing it right now and I know they're pushing for they want to try and move him so I can take Britain over

Thor Freya

That's an idea too they're trying to move him West to take over the East Coast

So we see it

Trump when it is you give him a little bit and you can see it but what he says is I get a bunch of stuff and I go out there and come back and keep them on the line as a backup and they'll feel good about it but the foreigners won't that actually makes more sense so we're going to look at that

It's not a bad idea I just see what you're saying and what you're doing it's a living hell and we're not making it that easy but we made it work

Bja

He says amazing it didn't work and it's horrific for them it's not true they think they're running their plans too there's some things that are off they say but not much but that's good for us

A cork and I'm making that drink and I'm making a plan to go out there to see your giant he says that's terrific make sure you ask the max for directions they might just tell you that's good for me

Olympus

What a happy day this is getting better and I thank you for bringing that up and I do remember him paying you it was like a regular check from LTV builders but it wasn't a payroll check yeah. I do recall it okay it was odd and you were saying so I just deposit this is yeah that's how it goes and they were not mailing the checks back then

Hera

I remember that day and you're acting weird it's like 2 weeks after you started and he handed to you and he said no this is perfect and you said what is it for and he said you work the first week for me and he said oh yeah is it that's good memory right there he wasn't saying it but then he said it's terrific and he said perfect and at the time you really needed it and it said to work and it was a lot of fun and you got an accident and they said that was why it wasn't we having a lot of trouble doing things for some reason is Max from their plan and just run everything into the ground every time it's a damn nightmare we're all exhausted they don't know what they're doing for real and it's going to be a nightmare we can't get him a simple check and have them leave people alone and have people leave him alone it's ridiculous there's no human on earth they can go through what he did he's different and you're going to see it and it's going to be awful he might be really screwed because of these stupid idiots. But really he gave him a check and it was from LTV builders and it wasn't a payroll check and he says how can you tell the difference there's no receipt stub and didn't say it took money out of stuff and that's one way so I do understand what you're saying

Preston

I know what it was was a regular check and it was longer and he says yeah those checks are usually the payroll checks are not really huge it's just they're a little bigger but this one looks like longer and thinner I think and so I get that

Hera

I remember what it looks like it was a payroll check but without the stub and you're looking at it to try and see what it was but really I have to give the stuff to you if it was a payroll check so I don't think you have to but it probably is a law and it is a law and I said I'll send the receipt later so I could be scamming everyone but I see what that would set off and we would try and take over social security

Walter Lewis what am I not be a good thing but that's how you do it

I don't understand something he couldn't tell if it was a payroll check and he looked at it for a little and he thought it was a personal check then you can see the perforations he doesn't remember doing it he just remember his it was like a longer check but they all are kind of and it's a different company it's a trick it's not a very nice one and you guys keep pulling the stupid s*** on him hey gets mad they didn't say the smaller and he says you are smaller but maximum making it work because a lot of work and he can't do everybody's job and it turned into a damn nightmare because of the mental health people and it's just not how it's done and it doesn't do what you're saying and it's always a stupid crap

Mac

So I will say something we went through the whole thing and you're both wondering and then you said I think you already paid me and she said I remember that and Walter and minor loose did not pay for that first week and they should have and it's it's really the same company's work so you can stay there in trouble but that's not really what it is and he didn't have them cut the check and the Trump just came out and were bothering them and harassing them and he says I know what it does you're seeing all the stuff and you don't know what it does and he told him and he said this is what I say we'll come out of nowhere for that check said I already wrote the check and I gave it to him and it's over this is but I work for both companies at the time and he said to shut your mouth and Trump said this you should pay him for both companies and then he said you really should and Trump said if I cut the check it'll look like I'm having trouble and then also need to start getting a smile on his face boy this is starting to blow does he work for both companies with minor loose didn't issue a check and he goes yeah I got that and it was thanks anyways and you meant it so he ran off and he's talking about it and the girls in the office and he's coming in as p Diddy and people said to wonder why and he went out there no he called the office and he is still working there and he said we have to cut a check and it's to his girls and it'll help us get her out and then he said this it might do a lot of other stuff and they said oh and they start to think about it and they said it'll trigger a huge amounts of into the pseudo empire and it's true and it kind of figured it out so. So he was thinking about doing it and usually he doesn't and he hasn't and people that storm Western development don't have the authority to write the check and yes Dan got laid off so it's kind of weird like that and the pseudo empire wants to use it but they can't do this on themselves and our son says so you know what it does and it seem to be cutting you out of the deal he says where's the come after me this is it depends no. HMC construction was underpaid a little bit you don't get affected by that it would be a personal lawsuit and he says oh yeah and that's pretty much and storm Western development held a severance check but it was Stan and he got fired any of those oh yeah so then he says so wonder how you have that covered anything oh yeah and it's starting to think about what to do and he said if I cut a check for the bonus out of payroll it goes to social security and cause a big mess so he couldn't figure out what would happen and our son says it might get me off the government check and that's what you should be doing because the max are running it and that made him angry cuz he knows the kind of running it no he says they're not ruining it I said they're running the money everybody a lot of other stuff you don't have enough people and he says oh so he's trying to check it and I wonder if I'm right because of big problem for them giving me a million dollars and he says a big problem you haven't caused me a bigger problem because foreigners don't want me to have that kind of money and you guys don't and he started smiling and said that's stupid

So now he's thinking of doing it and it's absolutely true so the question is who's going to do that and it would make a mess in DC and they're not really there that much so I comparison to the pseudo empire so he started to say this it's actually true and you guys want me to California to get protection from the foreigners and not on federal government money at least you shouldn't he's getting fired from a lot of jobs but this is what's going on people are figuring out that that would actually possibly work

Nuada Arrianna

Well I heard you say it a few times then I heard you say this they're coming off from the East and be on California disability or something and I would actually have some money not much and they like that then I heard your theory on Florida and it sounds better and they don't mind that either but they said if you had money you might move so they're back to that but then again they were using the law on Trump and the two companies he was running don't have issues with bonus checks storm came first and he said oh it's that guy and he started to think of this they're breaking the law all the time and saying it's me yeah and storm wasn't development paid pretty good they're pretty close and HMC and it was these guys so they be in trouble with the law and he might be able to recover using IRS agents and things like that so he had us go through it and that's what I see

Hera

That is what's happening and he's a mean person and ruthless and he might do it and it doesn't mean that our son would get paid it means there'd be a big fight over social security and he wants that to happen right around now and Tommy half does and other people like mac the pseudo empire and others who want to kidnap him

Nuada Arrianna

We are getting to work and this is the actual map and it's more harsh than what we were talking about before

Thor Freya

Olympus permission to print granted

[tornrose24]

Okay idea for an au of an au. Hear me out.... au where the lords do adopt Rose, but sad. Say the lords do take in Rose, but through miscommunication or whatever, they believe Ethan is a danger to her, or that he has the same intentions as Miranda. Whenever Ethan gets close to one of them, they hand Rose off to the next lord to keep her safe, knowing there might be a battle. The story goes through as usual with Ethan killing them one by one, continuously going from place to place to find his daughter, along the way finding small, child like artifacts like toys and such with a rose sown into them. By the end, all the lords are dead and Ethan as his daughter back. As he walks away with her, Rose sees the ashes of the family that had taken her in, and even in her infant mind, knows its them and starts bawling and trying to reach for pile of ashes. Ethan thinks shes basically traumatized from being kidnapped. It isnt til he find a photo of all four lords with Rose, as a family that he realizes that he may have made a mistake.

That is just... wow,

It’d be like the Malificent movie if it was actually good, had a downer ending, and didn’t pointlessly turn the dad into the villain just to make the main character look sympathetic. Or a Shadow of the Colossus tragedy.

So first off I don’t know how badly Ethan was needed for the ceremony,  but I could easily see Miranda doing some horrific gaslighting on the lords to make them think Ethan was an awful father and husband (especially given what she’s capable of doing and if she did it beforehand by knocking out Ethan for a bit and messing with Mia’s head and safety for a bit by posing as her husband. And I don’t think I need to say what kind of things happened in order to mess with not just the lords’ heads, but poor Mia as well...). And Miranda does not let them kill Ethan as much as they want to-she wants to get rid of her false children before she can get her true child back. What better way than a game of deception and let Ethan do the dirty work?

Alcina’s death would not only further convince the others that Ethan is the bad guy, but him killing her daughters first would only make things especially worse. Like by the time Bela dies, Rose is immediately sent to Donna. Unfortunately Alcina’s hatred for men (made worse by Miranda’s trickery) only further aids in her family’s downfall...

Donna would know what it’s like to have a genuine loving father. So she’d also have a personal grudge against Ethan for ‘being scum undeserving of the title of father’. And a lot of her mind games and what Angie says would reflect that (“Do you do this with Rose too” would take on a much more darker meaning). Her monsters in the basement would become more horrific and reflecting of young victims of crimes best left unsaid. However it only fuels Ethan’s anger moreso and he kills her. Yet Rose is already with Moreau...

Moreau is kind of already screwed given he can’t control his transformations (not only is the environment a safety hazard for an infant, but you can only do so much in a giant monster fish form) and his low IQ doesn’t help him out in this scenario. But he’d get Rose sent to Heisenburg just after meeting Ethan and likely try to kill him than just block off his exit. Yet he too is fated to die for a misunderstanding...

Heisenburg would be the only one to somewhat suspect that Ethan is actually a good guy and that Miranda was screwing with everyone’s heads, but he had no way to convince his ‘siblings’ otherwise. Even his words around Ethan would be more careful in case the worst case scenario is true. Yet the scars of the past still linger and he remembers all too well what it meant to be a child under an abusive/controlling ‘mother’ and his guard is up. However he’s also too focused on overthrowing Miranda and still says that Rose could be used to defeat Miranda, and like in canon Ethan just doesn’t trust him and it later leads to Heisenburg’s death. And without anyone to keep an eye on Rose, Miranda steals her away while the big fight is happening. (So basically Heisenburg sees that Rose could end up like him when Miranda took him, but revenge still comes first)....

The fact that there are no more villagers left to hide Rose doesn’t help and the Lycans are too focused on Chris and his group. Then Miranda does what none of the lords had the guts to do in the first place for her twisted ceremony...

And to further worsen the situation? Chris (who was probably keeping an eye on things) never tells Ethan that the lords never truly harmed his daughter, or even thought to approach the lords about the truth when he got an idea of the situation, yet understandably didn’t believe it was true, so things only got worse. And The Duke? The only other person who’d tell Ethan the truth? He probably wouldn’t have been in the loop and didn’t know of the lords’ rate moment of compassion. So things continue as they do...

I think I’m order for that photo to happen, Rose would of had to have spent a few days with the lords first before shit hit the fan. And it would have been stolen and hidden away until the very end, when it was too late. But yes, she’d have been around them long enough to not feel any fear towards them-perhaps she’d have grown attached to them. And the toys and gifts? Hints of truth and humanity, yet could easily be ignored by a desperate father who only cares about his daughter’s safety and nothing else.

Furthermore, maybe once upon a time the lords were once decent folks before Miranda came into their lives. But by the time of the AU’s current timeline, their own crimes and reputations would horrifically backfire on them in a time where they had a moment of humanity once more... Their only way of living on being through Rose’s memories and through the megamycte.

(Unless that crystal theory is true and they can be revived of course.)

[welcome-to-the-cafe]

Lust, Caution (2007)

What a good movie. Very stressful, suffering watch though. I will never look at Tony Leung the same ever again. Not that I've seen that many of his works (I'm sorry), but going into Shang-Chi after those bedroom scenes....hmhmhm.

Let's get into it.

The setting is my favorite period of Chinese history, Republican Era, partially because elicits strong feelings from yours truly, and partially because it has great aesthetics. The dresses. The cars. The gap between rich and poor. The impending invasion and atrocities you only know about in retrospect. The intrigue. The nationalism. What an awful time for living, what a great time to make art about later.

The students and their patriotic play reminds me of the my own college life and my own amateur play. Of course, theirs had much more public appeal and impact...and darker inspirations. Wang Leehom (who I recognized instantly but could not name until much later), was phenomenal as the wide-eyed idealistic Kuang Yumin who yearned to make "real contributions" to his country. This was his natural undoing of course, and that of his friends, being sucked into his charisma, and love interest, the main character Wong Chiachi. They were all doomed the moment he came up with the naive assassination plot.

The crux of the scheme is Chiachi, who is a phenomenal actress in all levels of story and metatext. An interpretation of her skill is that she injects true feelings into her performances; when she acts as Mrs. Mai, she really thinks of herself as a young lonely socialite, not an innocent college student. This is also her undoing, I believe. As Mrs. Mai, Chiachi is not fully able to isolate her heart from her target's advances. When she tells Mr. Yee she hates him, she is telling the truth, because she does think he is evil, but what following seems also to be honest; that she hates him for being away.

This is one criticism I have of the plot; I do not believe the movie did enough to show how Chiachi and Mr. Yee bonded emotionally. Like, they fucked. They fucked kinda gruesomely to be honest, because it seemed mostly to be sexual abuse (though mutual). I guess that's the point, that it was just lust that bound them together, but at the same time, I felt it should not have been enough to infect Chiachi to the point of giving it all up for him. Maybe that is just my own disappointment in her.

Perhaps it's a combination of push and pull. Chiachi is pulled by lust toward Mr. Yee, but it may not have been enough without the push from her "allies". More strongly portrayed than the fucked up lustful affair, I think, is the growing resentment and internal feelings of betrayal that Chiachi felt for her allies. Mr. Yee used her body for rough sex, but the revolutionaries (or "terrorists" as we started out calling them) used her body too for murder. Whether it was justified murder or not is moot; murder itself was horrific, something that all these students all knew they would hesitate execute. They openly worry about this multiple times: in their initial planning, when practicing shooting, when their prey is almost in the clutches. The wide-eyed idealist tries to convince everyone that it is easy, because he know it isn't. During the fight with Mr. Yee's chauffeur confronts them, Kuang Yumin stabs him less out of practical necessity I think, but as a learning opportunity to take life; to "blood" himself, and the group, to push everyone over the edge of hesitancy. Each of the students took turns to stab the dying chauffeur in order to cross the murder threshold. Traumatizing themselves together, they would be more willing to take on Mr. Yee. Chiachi, however, is truly horrified and runs away. This was what she was being exploited to do, and she couldn't handle it.

Her exploitation by allies is honestly to me the most heartbreaking part of the movie. She joins the outfit because of her crush on Kuang Yumin, but it was Yumin's scheme that set her as the honeytrap. It was Yumin who let one of his friends take her virginity, instead of stepping up to the role himself (Bruh! You like the girl! Go fuck her! 我的天呀。。。). Yeah, yeah arguments for authenticity so need someone with more experience, but that friend only screwed a prostitute once. It just adds to the suffering, for Chiachi and for the viewers. And then it was Yumin who brought her back into the scheme. Of course, she consented, but he knew two previous undercover mistresses were killed, so if he truly wanted to protect her he would've left her alone...or like banged her properly. By the Heavens. We know this bothers Chiachi a lot too because she tearfully asks him about it after a heated exchange with the mission controller. Speaking of which, what an asshole. "We move when I say we move". Like sure dude, we feel for you that your family got killed and you want to make this scheme count, but can't you see you're betraying this woman again and again every time you let her get raped and don't make a move? Of course not, he's blinded by rage. And yet the wuss doesn't have the stomach to listen to her recount her trauma. What an asshole, jesus.

I think it is frustrating to think about, because it all makes sense in a fucked up way. It is like solving an equation that returns an unfavorable answer, and yet you cannot find sufficient fault in each step.

So yeah I believe Chiachi betrayed the cause more because of push than pull.

Although...I only now remember the tender moment at the Japanese geisha house, where she sings for him the sweet folk tune. Previously he commented on the Japanese being afraid of the Americans, suggesting that he's just a nihilist resigned to his job; the sweet nostalgia of her opera bit may have cracked him for real for the first time in a while.

The final shots of Mr. Yee being sad about Chiachi...yeah, I still have zero sympathy for him. My headcanon is that for consorting with mistresses so much, the Japanese betrayed him to the Republic and he is led into a trap, where he is injured in a brutal confrontation, but is successfully captured. He is then jailed until after the Second War, where he is released to work for the KMT's counterespionage. However, he is not as sharp as he used to be, and he is led into another honey trap, only this time, he is busted the very first time he tries to rendezvous with the girl. He is captured again, and when his past is revealed after the Liberation, he is paraded to the middle of Shanghai and shot in the back of the head.

Looking forward to Tony Leung once again in Shang-Chi.

[fandom-fangirler]

Pick me up when I fall (Tanjiro x reader)

Summary: You return from a mission injured, and Tanjiro soon learns that your wound was self-inflicted.

This story may be interpreted as platonic or romantic, that’s up to you. If you want him to be your boyfriend in this oneshot, or if he’s your best friend, is your decision.

Warnings: self-harm, blood, angst, heavily implied killing of a demon. If you are sensitive to any of these topics, please do not read this. I want you to stay safe, so please don’t read this if it may trigger you.

Word count - 1895

Yes, I was working on this until past 12:30 on a school night. Fight me.

Tanjiro knew something was wrong when your scent changed. At first he thought you were having a bad day, but then as the days passed your scent continued to grow stronger, and it was almost constantly one of a deep sadness and despair. When you returned from a mission and the first thing he smelled was blood, he ran to the front of the building like his life depended on it. When his eyes landed on you, there was a large gash on the side of your left leg, spread over almost the entire length of your calf. He was at your side in an instant, pulling your arm around his shoulder to help you walk as he exclaimed,

“What happened?!” You stiffened at the sudden contact, and tried not to wince at the pressure put on your ribcage - you were almost certain you had cracked at least one of them.

“Was just a difficult mission is all - a demon slashed my leg in a fight,” you lied. Tanjiro smelled another new scent from you in that moment, he had never smelled it from you before, and could not recognize what it was.

“Let’s go, we need to get you to the docto-”

“No! I’m fine, Tanjiro, I’ll heal on my own, I really don’t need medical attention,” you cut in, knowing the doctor would know your cut was not one from a demon.

“Y/n, it's okay. There’s nothing to be worried about. Please,” Tanjiro said, and as you gazed into his eyes you saw a genuine concern for you. You sighed, internally panicking as you tried to think of any possible way out of this situation, or any explanations you could give of what happened. Tanjiro was already leading you to the doctor, and you had no choice but to walk along with him. You were screwed.

Tanjiro could smell your distress, but couldn’t figure out why you would be so terrified. Soon he was opening the door to the medical room for you, and you slowly stepped through. You walked to the middle of the room and took a seat on the floor. Tanjiro sat next to you, taking your hand in his as he smelled the fear radiating off of you.

“Why are you so nervous?” he asked softly.

“I just don’t like doctors,” you replied, not completely untruthfully. You had always disliked and been anxious about going to the doctor, even for a simple check-up.

“Are you sure that’s it? You seem… terrified. More than you normally are for a doctor visit. You’ve been afraid even before I told you you should come here.” At that moment, the doctor entered the room. His eyes widened when they landed on your leg.

“Miss L/n, what happened?” he questioned, kneeling next to you with his medical equipment.

“I- I was attacked by a demon,” you said, and Tanjiro noted that your scent of fear and hesitation grew stronger when you said that. The doctor treated your leg, and left for a moment to get some test results. When he returned, he spoke,

“Miss L/n, what really happened to you out there? These test results clearly show that you were not attacked by a demon.” He didn’t specify what the results showed, so that he might know whether the answer you gave would be another lie or not.

That was what made Tanjiro remember what had happened a few minutes before, when you gave off a new scent when you told him you were attacked by a demon. He now knew what it was - deceit. But why would you lie to him? Especially about how you had been hurt?

“Oh, did I say demon? I-I meant a demon slayer. I killed a demon that another slayer was apparently hunting, and he was angry and started attacking me.” You threw your answer together quickly, but it was better than you had expected. Still, Tanjiro could smell the stench of deceit once more.

“Miss L/n, may I see your sword?” The doctor asked, extending his hands.

What?

He asked for your sword?

You hadn’t thought to clean it before, since you could always say it was the blood of a demon you killed. You knew you were going to have to hand over your sword, but you tried to stall anyways.

“Why?”

“Miss Y/n. Your sword, please.” The doctor pushed his hands closer to you, and Tanjiro watched as you shakily pulled your sword, which was covered in blood, from its sheath on your hip, placing it in the doctor’s waiting hands. He stood, still holding your sword, and walked to another room, presumably to run a test on the blood.

Tanjiro was caught by surprise as he smelled your fear growing even more intense, and you began to shake, leaning on your right arm, which had its palm against the ground, for support as tears streamed down your cheeks. His expression softened (his expression is always soft, but just pretend) as he carefully wrapped an arm around you, letting you cry into his shoulder. As your breathing became less erratic, and slightly slower, Tanjiro considered what to say to you. His voice was soft and laced with care as he slowly asked,

“What’s wrong? Why are you so scared of giving him your sword?” He paused, before adding, quieter, “Why did you lie about what hurt you?”

You didn’t know what to say. You knew he would know that you were lying, so you couldn’t fabricate an answer. At the same time, you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him the truth. As you opened your mouth to try to tell him what happened, the doctor walked in with a frown.

“Miss Y/n…. you were not attacked by a demon slayer, unless they took your sword from you and cut you with it.” Tanjiro was still processing what the doctor had said as you stood, stumbling slightly because of your injured leg, before walking over to the doctor.

“Yes, I didn’t tell the entire story. But that’s what happened.” You reached to take your sword back, but the doctor held it out of your reach. He turned to Tanjiro.

“Mr. Kamado, please take this, and do not allow it within sight of Miss L/n until I say otherwise.” Your eyes widened, feeling stiff from the tear stains that lined them.

“What?! That’s my sword! I need it! How else am I supposed to go on missions?”

“You won’t be going on missions until I feel you will be safe and will not harm yourself. Perhaps in a few weeks I will allow you to go on a mission, provided Mr. Kamado accompanies you.” That was when the doctor’s previous words really sunk in. You had cut yourself with your sword. Intentionally. That was why you were so afraid when he made you come here - because you knew the doctor would find out. He had to fight off tears himself as the reality of the situation sunk in. He stood, walking over to stand beside you, before the doctor.

“Thank you, sir,” he said shakily as he took your weapon and put it in his sheath (he didn’t bring his sword or two swords somehow fit, idk). “Come on, Y/n.”

The walk to your room was silent, and it bothered you more than anything. The uncomfortable silence hung thick in the atmosphere, and you tried to focus on anything other than the impending conversation with Tanjiro.

As Tanjiro walked beside you, he could smell that your fear was not at all gone, though it seemed to give way to something else, or perhaps more specific - fear of disappointing someone, or letting them - probably him - down.

Soon you had arrived in your room, and you stepped in and tried closing the door before Tanjiro could enter, but to no avail. His reflexes were almost faster than lightning, and he caught the door with his hand before you could fully close it.

“Y/n,” he sighed, “Let me in. We need to talk about this.”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” you said as you averted your gaze.

“Please.” When you looked up again, you saw nothing but love and worry for you in his dark red eyes. You relented, stepping away from the door and walking to your bed, sitting down.

“Fine.” Tanjiro thanked you, and stepped over the threshold, closing the door behind him. He wordlessly sat next to you, and the two of you sat in silence for a few moments, before he broke it.

“Why?”

It was a simple question, but there was not a simple answer. You didn’t know how to explain it, without telling him everything. You took a deep breath, thinking of how to respond, and trying not to break down again. It didn’t work, and soon Tanjiro enveloped you in a warm, comforting embrace as you cried. He rubbed circles in your back with the palm of his hand, doing whatever he could to help you and comfort you. He knew you had been in pain, but he never would have imagined it would be so great you would hurt yourself. It took a while, but you had eventually calmed down, and you pulled away from Tanjiro, rubbing your eye.

“A week ago…. I-I found out m-my family was… k-killed,” you spoke slowly, and Tanjiro was patient as he waited for you to find your words. When the sentence had left your lips, he gasped softly.

“Y/n…. I’m so sorry…. I had no idea.” He pulled you closer into his side as he continued to rub circles into your back, occasionally running a hand through your hair. You slowly continued,

“When I went on the m-mission…. I saw a d-demon,” your breathing was growing more erratic as you spoke, “b-but it was m-my…. M-my b-brother. H-he a-attacked me…. And I-I…. I-I….” you couldn’t finish, the image of what you had seen and done was too horrific. Tanjiro understood what happened, and tightened his grip around you.

“That’s terrible. I’m so sorry, Y/n. But it was unavoidable, it was your life or his. And I’m glad you chose yours. Your brother wouldn’t have wanted to be a demon either - and he would never want to lose you.” After a moment, he added, “And I don’t want to lose you.” You listened to his words and tried to accept them. “But, Y/n…” Tanjiro glanced down to your leg, wincing at how deep the cut was. “Please, don’t hurt yourself. I know you’re in a lot of pain, but please, don’t do this to yourself. I’m here for you if you ever need anything.” You thought on Tanjiro’s words, before slowly nodding your head.

“I…. I can’t promise I’ll never do it again, Tanjiro. B-but, I’ll try.” Tanjiro looked at you, a gentle smile forming on his lips.

“Thank you, Y/n. I don’t know what I would do if I lost you.” You wrapped both of your arms around him, pulling him into another hug. You knew it wouldn’t be easy to move past the losses you’d suffered, or to accept what you had done to your brother, but with Tanjiro by your side, you could do anything. He would always be there for you, to pick you back up when you fall.

[secretlifeoftheoutcast]

Me and Wendy are just constantly begging Travis to love us…

Like seriously I’m so tired of feeling lonely. It really feels like he’s tired of me. We hardly ever hug, or kiss, or snuggle, OR EVEN TALK anymore. This is exactly how I was feeling whenever he fell in move with izzy. The only difference is we were fighting more then. “The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference.”

That’s exactly what it feels like on my end. He is indifferent towards me. I tell him I’m sad. I tell him I’m lonely. I tell him I literally want to run my car off a bridge. I tell him I have been feeling this way for weeks, MONTHS and even. And he still turns it to where I am the bad guy… I am so close to giving up. And not just on me and Travis….. I mean on life. On everything.

If I can’t have a family, a forever, a true love story with Travis, I don’t want to be here anymore. And I feel like he gave up a long time ago. Actually, he gave up on that when he chose Izzy.

I have nightmares EVERY SINGLE NIGHT about him leaving me for her and him telling me he never loved me and was just using me and still is to this day. They feel so real. When he tells me, “I’m only with you so I don’t have to live with my mom”, “I’m only with you until she realizes what she could have with me”, “I’m only with you because I know you would do anything and give everything for me”, “I have so many bitches lined up waiting for you to screw up, and I tell them they have a chance because I KNOW you’ll fuck up. And then I won’t feel bad about leaving you.”…. IT ALL FEELS SO GOD DAMN REAL. Because he has told me that he never loved me and never could. I was just attention and sex to him. Then he fell in “REAL, TRUE LOVE” with Izzy and didn’t know how to leave me. So he led me on and put me through hell. Months of fighting and screaming and wondering why I was never enough. Wondering why he was talking to her all night and not me even though I was in his room. Wondering why she was impossible enough to pause his game and respond to her but my physical presence and love was NEVER and could never be enough. Even though he said “oh don’t worry she’s just a friend.” And I told him over . And OVER, AND OVER. That I was uncomfortable, and he swore it was done. Even though they were “just friends”, he swore they stopped talking…. They never did. And probably are still talking. Because I will never be enough. I never was. I never will be. I am pathetic. I want to die. It wouldn’t be hard. I know how to do it. I just need the money, then I’ll be gone for good.

The world would be better off without me in it. All of my family. Travis. All of my “friends”. Liv, Angelica, Gareth, Tyler. They might act like they’re sad at first, but after a few months they would let themselves feel the relieved they have always yearned for. I don’t have a place on this earth. I am useless, I am pathetic, I only cause chaos and pain, I am hopeless, I am disgusting, I am a bad friend, I am a user, I am a taker, I am a liar, I am a horrible HORRIFIC human. And I don’t deserve to live anymore.

I get why everything bad has happened to me. I really do. I don’t deserve anything good. The bad will keep coming until I’m gone. Hopefully that’s soon because I can’t handle this anymore. I really can’t.

I have so much love to give to my people but obviously I give it in the wrong way. They don’t see it, feel it, or know it’s there. Even if I tell them. So I give up. I’m done.

Hopefully I don’t wake up tomorrow. ✌🏼

[sanvitheartificer]

time for “I’m gonna screw up my courage and post creative ideas, i guess”  latest little interest-drift is Megamind, which i DID see once, when it came out? I should rewatch it, but that would require tracking it down, and i’m pretty sure I’m going to be bored of the movie by the time I can make myself do that.  I mention this because this is going to be.... nooooot well researched, i guess? like I’m going off fanfic and vague recollections of a movie i watched 10 years ago and i refuse to double check anything because the POINT is to be honest about what I’m thinking about without having to make it well-put-together. 

so, this is a fun idea! but not a good one. 

anyway: concept for a fic i’ll never write! it’s a post-canon time-travel fix-it story where Megamind saves his planet. I’m Pretty Sure that Megamind universe specifically doesn’t allow time travel/a redo button, BUT i have a way around that.  once i read a really interesting harry potter fic wherein George saved Fred. in HP time travel seems to work okay, as long as you’re doing something that you already did -- Harry sees his future self saving himself, for example. So in this fic, George went back in time, hid from everyone in the past, and made Fred’s death look exactly like he remembered -- but secretly saved him. It had always happened that way; Fred had never actually died in that battle; everyone just thought he did. And then George took Fred back to the future! and he was alive after that, just missing, like, a year of his life or whatever. (i might be getting which twin dies mixed up and i’ll tell you what: i literally don’t care)  This has always been a fascinating concept that I’ve wanted to use in something, and a universe like Megamind where I’m (pretty sure?) they say “reset buttons aren’t a thing” is perfect for it.  So! Post canon, Megamind is a hero, is traumatized, is dating Roxanne, etcetera. at some point “I’m literally the last of my species and so is Minion” comes up. 

Roxanne... wonders. about this. it’s horrifically traumatic, of course, and he did say that thing about reset buttons being impossible, but... also. also? she’s seen a LOT of impossible things, lately. She asks Megamind some subtle, theoretical, “just curious” questions about time travel. What, exactly, is impossible about it? 

You can’t change what’s already happened, he says. Paradox. The time-space continuum won’t let it happen. Trust me, I tried. You can... you can go back, but you can’t change anything, all you can do is, is, walk around an empty field maybe, at the most. 

He looks so sad at that that she stops pushing. But Minion keeps records of almost every experiment they’ve ever tried, every machine they’ve ever built and she has access, now, and... it could work. She’s just human, she’s not sure, but she thinks maybe it could work, she could give him -- give him a world, she laughs, a little hysterically, because sometimes people say “i want to give them the moon” and that’s supposed to be hyperbole and this is -- this is even bigger, somehow, what is she even thinking -- 

but she keeps thinking about it. is the thing.

megamind goes quiet, still, when she finally brings it up, and roxanne flinches but meets his gaze. she won’t back down from this. not when it’s this, not when there’s a chance she could save a whole world. two worlds, even!

he’s angry, and he’s scared, and minion at his side isn’t playing peacekeeper like he normally would, because minion looks just as angry, or maybe even more. 

how could you, minion says, roxanne, how could you, and roxanne flinches but she meets his gaze, and she has never seen minion so angry in her life. 

tell me it won’t work.

she looks, steady, in both their faces, caving in with a grief bigger than she can imagine, the anger of a hundred trillion billion lives, just gone. 

Tell me it won’t work, and I won’t -- I’ll -- I can’t make up for telling you this, for asking you this, she says, I can’t, but I’ll say what I can, I’ll do what I can to fix it. But first tell me it won’t work, that it’s completely impossible, because if it’s possible it’s -- it’s your world, and her voice cracks, because she can’t say anything bigger than that, because there is no poetry in the universe that could contain a loss that immense. 

and megamind shakes his head, and minion’s fists are clenched so hard the metal creaks, and neither of them. says. anything. 

Megamind discovers, after figuring out how to compare earth time to time thirty years in the past in another part of space, that the black hole actually should not have destroyed his planet for an hour. after what he remembers. it’s not... clear, of course, because anyone who was close enough to measure this accurately is dead. but. but it doesn’t match up, and maybe it’s his calculations, or his memories; he was eight days old; maybe he’s wrong 

(maybe he’s not. maybe there’s. maybe there’s a possibility.) 

and once he’s started thinking about it he can’t stop. of course he can’t stop. it’s his world, every person who looks like him in the whole universe, it’s -- he’s lived on earth his entire life, but this is -- 

Megamind starts theorizing about making something that looks a lot like a black hole, that could transport entire planets through time. he starts doing experiments. if you take something forward -- if no one knows -- 

it seems to work, somehow; it’s so complicated that even Megamind isn’t entirely sure why, or how, this will work. he can’t stop a black hole, but maybe he can swallow up his world, steal it away before it gets a chance, maybe he can -- he thinks of his parent, saying, “you are destined for -- “ and laughs and laughs because maybe what he destined for is! is this! to destroy his entire planet before the black hole even gets there! maybe he is -- maybe he is -- 

but the thing is. there will be a device. a very large device, and he’ll have to somehow simulate a black hole swallowing two planets whole, he’ll have to find some way to yank them all forward; he needs someone who’s impossibly strong, who can move fast. an hour, an hour (57 minutes 33 seconds 12 milliseconds --  will it be enough? could it possibly be enough?) they could arrive sooner but no one can see them and even he can’t sustain a jump for very long, not when they want to bring two planets back with them -- he needs. wayne. he needs metro man. 

they talk. sometimes. it’s awkward. wayne hasn’t gotten any better at guitar, even though it’s been three and a half years, now. megamind still doesn’t like him, but... well... he’s. metro man. they’ve always been something to each other, and it’s harder to give that up than he ever would have expected. besides, roxanne likes it, when they talk. she doesn’t like metro man, either, but she thinks he’s someone, too, was friends with him for a long time. it’s wrong, somehow, to just never talk to him, terrible music and decades of enmity and horrible betrayal of a faked death or not. 

on very rare occasions he even has semi-kind-of useful-ish advice about the whole “hero” thing. minion still refuses to acknowledge metro man’s continuing existence, but megamind is... he’s not. angry, or sad, that he didn’t actually die, that megamind didn’t actually kill him. whatever he is, it’s not sad. 

roxanne is there, when they talk to wayne. even minion is there, angry, angry, angry, but there, asking. 

wayne laughs. megamind asks him to help save both of their planets, billions and billions of sentient lives, and he laughs, like it’s a good joke, and roxanne thinks that this is the evillest laugh she’s ever heard and minion somehow looks even angrier than when she first brought up the possibility and he’s still -- he’s -- how can he possibly be this -- 

c’mon, he says, you’re not serious.

wayne is. he’s stupid, but he isn’t this stupid. roxanne pretended to date him for long enough that she recognizes the look in his eyes, the tone of his voice. 

wayne is terrified. 

megamind looks ready to lunge at him invulnerable or not and minion just goes blank and roxanne grabs wayne’s arm, like she’s back at one of the endless fancy galas and he’s just said something thoughtless to the mayor, and she smiles with teeth, and she says, give me a minute alone with wayne, will you? thanks. 

they step aside and she rounds on him. 

they were serious, and you know it, she says, calm. that was cruel, she says, like she’s talking to a child. like she’s talking to someone who doesn’t know better. 

i, he says, and doesn’t complete the sentence. 

you. don’t have to help, she says, although the words scrape her throat; they can’t do this without him, and it’s not her world but it is -- it’s megamind’s world, it’s minion’s world, and she’s spent so long thinking -- trying to figure this out -- listening -- some days she can almost see it, before the black hole, before anything -- billions and billions and billions of lives -- but she is a reporter and she is used to talking neutrally about things that are not neutral at all so she says, you don’t have to help. but you can’t... don’t make fun of them. don’t pretend like it’s not serious. this is their home world, it’s their whole species, it’s, it’s your -- 

wayne interrupts her. THIS IS MY HOME, he roars, and he is frightening, now, three heads taller than roxanne already and floating three feet off the ground. this is! i! i’m! human!

his voice breaks. wayne never was a good liar. 

this is my home, he says, weakly, but wayne never was a good liar, and this time he isn’t lying at all. 

roxie, i’m tired, he says. i’m so tired of being the hero -- being the only one who can -- what if they don’t like me? he says, and he looks like a child, again, and he sounds like a child, again, an alien who could pretend, could pretend really well, but was never really -- 

wayne never was a good liar. except, of course, when he was lying to himself. 

wayne, she says, wayne. i won’t lie to you. this isn’t... fair. to ask you. you’re not a hero, anymore, and it’s not... fair. but. but... 

she takes a deep breath. 

you have a home. here. and you won’t. you won’t lose it, okay? I’m still your friend, and your parents are still, still your parents, still the people that raised you. we’re... we’re adding things, okay? we’re not taking them away. 

and you’re -- i’m so, so, so sorry wayne, but you really are the only one who can do it, this time. 

they are quiet, for a moment. and then roxanne says, quietly, have you ever heard him sing? 

wayne looks confused, past the anger, past the fear. he shakes his head. 

he only knows a few songs. they didn’t... he... he knows a few songs. he’s sung them for me, and told me what they -- wayne. there were sunsets, there, over the sea, the whole world lit up in red and blue and gold shining the ocean vibrating with music, and he says -- he told me, once, that your world had mountains, bigger than any of earth’s mountains, and once they lived at the very top, they -- 

stop, he says, soft, in all the ways wayne never is, 

music man, she says, don’t you want to listen to the music you never got to hear? 

stop, he demands, glass-fragile. 

he only knows a few songs, she says, bleakly. and her voice is like a black hole that wayne cannot remember, empty, empty with its impossible fullness. two entire worlds, and he only knows a few songs. 

okay, wayne whispers. 

okay. 

i’ll help. 

[darkarfs]

my favorite WWE matches of 1997

Though I officially started watching wrestling in 1995 (my family famously first bought SummerSlam that year, which would be my first wrestling show ever, because it was $25.00. 1995 was a bad year for wrestling), I became a regular watcher of both WWE and WCW Raw and Nitro, and was able to buy my own PPVs, around summer of 1996, when Hogan turned. The first show I bought with my own money was In Your House: Buried Alive, though I kept up with weekly TV. And, for better or worse, I've been a fan ever since.

1997 was a REAL rollercoaster year for wrestling. The NWO was becoming a bloated mess in no time at all, Bret Hart was riding high, while he and Shawn Michaels publicly hated one another, a young Rocky Maivia was slowly transforming into the most charismatic wrestler of maybe all time, a young Steve Austin has broken his neck and can only work 5 minute matches but is somehow the most OVER wrestler in the company, and by the end of the year, the Screwjob happens, Bret's in WCW, Shawn's on handfuls of SOMAs (yet main-eventing). In a lot of ways, I'm grateful, because I side-stepped all of Hogan's WWF and WCW run. But it was a tornado of a year for a business always on precarious footing, as it ever has been.

And it gave us some CRACKING matches! - The 1997 Royal Rumble I love me a Rumble, and it's REALLY hard (but not impossible) to find a bad one (1993, 1995, 1999). And I personally love one with a storyline that runs throughout, and in this case, it's the ultimate heeling of Stone Cold Steve Austin. He visibly dominates the match until he hears Bret Hart's music, and then goes into panic mode. And it furthers the characterization of Bret's hand-spun narrative as being rightfully pissed that he's being taken advantage of by the roster, screwed by the company, and booed by the fans. Fun bonus: this is also the only Rumble appearance of lucha legend Mil Mascaras, who was so full of old-school carny spirit he famously refused to let anyone else eliminate him, so he eliminated himself, pissed Vince off, and was not spoken of again on WWE TV until the 2012 Hall of Fame ceremony, where he was inducted by his huge prick nephew, Alberto del Rio. - Bret Hart vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin, WrestleMania 13 This match is considered legendary, and for good reason. The greatest technical wrestler in the company vs. the best brawler, months of build, the world's most iconic (and off-the-cuff) blade-job (so much so that the visual of Austin bleeding in the Sharpshooter going "DAAAHHHH!" became the cover for his first VHS) and the wrestling world's most exquisite double-turn. It's fun, it's thrilling, it feels at once timeless and modern. Fun fact: there's a fun version of this match you can watch with just Austin doing commentary over it, and it's entertaining as hell. A true classic, and one of the greatest 'Mania matches of all time. - Ken Shamrock vs. Vader, No Holds Barred match, In Your House: a Cold Day In Hell Vader, famously, while a big teddy bear and a for-all-accounts lovely guy outside of the ring, had a reputation of being a bit "snug" with other wrestlers. Meaning he hit a little too hard, had little self-control, and took liberties with people, especially rookies and younger guys. It's supposedly why Shawn Michaels didn't want to work a world title program with him from summer to fall of 1996, because he was "too rough." But what never occurred to Vader is that trying that with a guy who's had 2 matches but has almost 5 years of MMA experience might not be the smartest or most prudent idea. Shamrock gives Vader as much as Vader gives him in this match, and there are moments where you can tell the guys are going into business for themselves. There's a moment where Shamrock is clubbing Vader with punches, and you can hear Vader, as he's turtling up and putting his arms up to block, yell "SLOW DOWN!" and then he rolls out of the ring to catch a breather. Vader, by the end of this match, is bleeding through his mask, a product of a broken nose, which is why I assume he gives Shamrock the stiffest short-arm clothesline I've ever seen. It's brutal, it's stupid, it weaves in and out of the script SO many times like a drunk man trying to stand up straight on a canoe, and I'm fascinated by each and every instance. - Owen Hart vs. the British Bulldog, European Championship Tournament Finals, Monday Night Raw, March 3rd Somehow, a workrate classic is stuck on a rinky-dink episode of Raw from Berlin, Germany. Smith and Hart blended some of their acquired WWE-style of work with classic junior heavyweight wrestling, complete with intricate reversals and fast-paced offense that was unlike either man's designed ethos of the time. Hart's shift toward his underhanded instincts as the match wore on provided enough story to balance the beautiful grappling from two men with impressive resumes. You can feel that these two knew one another, grew up together, and most importantly, wrestled together. An honest-to-God sleeper hit, but everyone who knows this match calls it a classic. - Shawn Michaels vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin, King of the Ring It's a concept that would be beaten into the ground in short order: Tag Team Champions that hate each other's guts. John Cena, seriously, has only been tag champions with people he's feuding with. That's

not even a joke. Austin and Michaels won the belts out of mutual dislike for the Hart Foundation, and then were programmed together for a wild match at the King of the Ring, one without a winner. Early on, the two actually pieced together a tremendous wrestling match full of nifty counters (prior to Austin changing his style after August for obvious reasons), before it degenerated into chaos after both men assaulted referees in the heat of the moment. Granted, neither man could really lose this one, so the screwy finish did serve its purpose. Until that point, it's a different type of incredible Austin match. You're never so happy to see a double-DQ finish. - Owen Hart & the British Bulldog vs. Shawn Michaels & Stone Cold Steve Austin, Monday Night Raw, May 26th And now we have a match set! The previous 4 participants in a brilliant and brutal tag team match. The Tag Team championship switch marked Austin's first piece of recognized gold in WWE, in a match on free television no less. That's not to insult the match any, as it was a pay-per-view quality fracas that barely slowed down. It is a mere 14 minutes long WITH entrances, but it moves at a clip, and everyone has their working boots on. It was a harbinger of days to come for this new period in WWE's history, and the crowd ate it up.

- Taka Michinoku vs. the Great Sasuke, In Your House: Canadian Stampede What happened here? Just when you think WCW had the cruiserweights cornered, WWE pulls this shit...and then kind of ignores it for a few months. But not before importing two of Michinoku Pro's finest to have a TakeOver-length exhibition. At first, the crowd in Calgary wasn't sure what to make of the undersized performers, but it wouldn't take long to win them over. From Michinoku's hands-free springboard dive to Sasuke's beautiful Thunder Fire Powerbomb, the expansive crowd was positively hooked on the daredevils with each passing minute. Although Sasuke wouldn't be long for the company, and Michinoku's run as Light Heavyweight Champion faded as 1998 wore on, the display at Canadian Stampede was a wondrous experience. This wouldn't have looked out of place in a Chikara King of Trios tournament. - The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart, Owen Hart, Jim Neidhart, Brian Pillman, the British Bulldog) vs. Team Austin (Stone Cold Steve Austin, the Legion of Doom, Ken Shamrock and Goldust), In Your House: Canadian Stampede I would have put this match on the list for the entrances and the finish alone. The crowd is at fever static for the entire match, seriously at the level of Punk/Cena at MITB 2011. And even though the Harts are the heels, they're in Calgary, and they get rock-star level ovations for merely existing. Everyone plays it mad and delighted, and you can tell they're all having a ball. Especially Pillman, who is just magically unhinged, a template for a young Dean Ambrose during their feud with the Wyatt Family. It is a magical, unreal main event, one of the best B-ppv main events maybe of all time. Well...other than MAYBE... - Shawn Michaels vs. the Undertaker, Hell in a Cell, In Your House: Badd Blood The very first Hell in a Cell match may very well double as the greatest of its kind. What stands out to me (other than how the match ends) is just how GREAT Michaels' selling is. When he's running away, he's constantly looking around for an exit, like a scared rat. When he finally gets caught and struck, he sells almost to the level he did for Hogan at SummerSlam 2005. But while he was doing that to make Hogan's offense look stupid, he's doing it here to make Taker's offense and anger look legit, and it somehow WORKS. But as fabulous as the match and the psychology is, it somehow takes a backseat to the debut of the Undertaker's monstrous little brother Kane, finally confronting his older brother in perhaps the greatest character debut in WWE history. - Mankind vs. Kane, Survivor Series I dunno what it is about this match that does it for me. Mankind's emotional lead-up to the match, where he's sad that Uncle Paul (Bearer) left him. Maybe the fact that Kane sells like Michael Myers, not so much that he's in pain, but as if he's never been hit in the face with a steel chair, a DDT or a piledriver. Maybe it's because Mick takes more horrific bumps than he needs to to make sure Kane looks like a legit monster. Maybe it's the broken Virtua Boy lighting. But it's genuinely unlike any other Mankind, Kane or ANY match I've seen before or since. It's a perfect somehow sympathetic serial killer vs. bigger, scarier serial killer that feels nothing story in a wrestling match. I didn't even know you could DO that.

[dontgofarfromme]

While we're on the subject of redemption arcs, what were your thoughts on the ones in Oathbringer? I wasn't on Tumblr yet, so I think I missed your hot takes, and I'm really curious!

Ohhhhh man okay I love Oathbringer so much but also it's been like 2 years since I read it in full so I do NOT have a fresh memory of it, so this'll be a little vague maybe.

In terms redemption arcs....this book kind of kills it? Like. Okay I dont wanna shit on Zuko but everyone always brings Zuko up as the 'ideal redemption arc' and I'm not saying it was bad because it wasn't it was well done, but I've also seen people saying that the reason Zuko's redemption arc works is because he wasn't totally evil, and because he didnt commit super horrific crimes so he was on the redeemable side of some arbitrary line we've drawn. Like a requirement for a redemption arc is being on the correct side of that line otherwise there should be no stories that investigate how or if a person can be redeemed and what that would look like.

Anyway. I think thats kinda bullshit. I love Zuko and I love his arc but also....its like lukewarm in terms of where we can go with a redemption arc because Zuko is never the real villain, he's never just clearly evil, he does bad things and hurts the mcs but he's conflicted and regretful and showing signs of wanting to change and always a secondary bad guy to someone else.

And those things might make his arc more palatable and easy to draw on as an example of an effective redemption arc to some people, but also they allow you to skirt around a lot of the most interesting questions that can arise in this sort of arc. Like. I dont wanna say that it's boring but. It's sad to me that it's most people's go to (maybe only??? The things some people reference as being redemption arcs actually drive me up a wall) example of a well done redemption arc bc the questions you can pose about this are limited when the set up is a generally soft hearted boy from a messed up family is trying SO HARD to please his dad by being evil but also his really chill uncle is there to mitigate his worst ideas the whole time and hes super inefficient at being bad because he's 16.

IN CONTRAST. Oathbringer takes a character we thought we knew as good and turns him on his head. It gives us a past Dalinar and shows him as chaotic, uncontrollable, angry, warmongering, the extent of his bloodthirst contrasted against and shown to be greater that of characters we currently hate in the present day series. It shows us his anger and his violence and his lack of care for anyone and his failure at fatherhood and husbandhood and then his absolute darkest moment in which he unflinchingly directs the massacre of an entire city in a fit of rage.

And then it turns and it asks not only Dalinar himself, and the other characters, but also--by virtue of this being the third book, after we've already known current, measured, thoughtful Dalinar for 2 books--asks us if we can accept him as being redeemed. It presents us with a character who has done things that are so horrendous he would make for a terrifying and effective villain in basically any setting you put him in, and has him screw up massively, break down, spiral, hate himself, be mentally magically altered so that he can live with himself and try to become better rather than collapsing in on himself and becoming an utterly nonfunctional person, and then takes that protection away and asks him who are you now?

Who are you after everything terrible you've done and everything you've tried to make yourself into following that and can you be a person again? Will you crumple in on yourself or will you blame your failures on magic because that's the easy thing to do or will you ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE THINGS YOU HAVE DONE AND MOVE FORWARDS? And does doing so make a person redeemed? Or are there things so terrible that nothing you do can ever make it right? Even if you believe that to be the case, is it worth it to try anyway? And how do the answers Dalinar finds to these questions and the answers we find to these questions impact how we as readers view Dalinar compared to how we thought of him for the first two books?

There are tons of other things I could yell about for hours wrt OB including how Moash is an extremely effective foil for not only for Kaladin but also for Dalinar to an extent because his arc is a spiralling character degradation into NOT taking responsibility, and what happens when you have an outside force influencing some of your actions (like Dalinar's being influenced by the thrill, Moash's experiences of discrimination ARE a factor in his actions) and you push ALL the responsibility from ALL your actions onto that force and how that can hinder both your ability to redeem yourself AND to move forward and progress positively as a person.

And I'm also very capable of yelling for hours abt non-redemption arc related aspects of OB BUT. This book is a brick and my thoughts on it are probably that times 10 and I do want to sleep tonight and I have no real conclusion other than that this is a really frickin good book that has the guts to explore a lot of extremely difficult and complex topics and it's great.