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just-a-casual-newtasaur · 1 month ago

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(Spent far too long on this picture 🥲)

Talking to the stars

Newtmas

Words Count: 1k

Warnings: spoilers, sappy writing from me

Summary: based off this post

Everyone knew he wasn’t right in the head. Everyone knew he would never be right in the head again. Not after what he had caused. No matter what the others said, it was his fault. It was all his fault.

So they had all come accustomed to him clasping his own hands together as he walked as though to fool himself into believing that Newt was still there beside him. They came accustomed to him saving seats beside the fire that he would let nobody fill up, even if it meant him standing. They came accustomed to him talking to himself, still trying to fool himself that Newt was there, and still pretending he was.

It was heartbreaking to watch, especially for Minho. One of his greatest friends, completely broken. It wasn’t like he wasn’t devastated, of course he was, but the whole ordeal had completely shattered Thomas. If it wasn’t for all the gladers, Minho wouldn’t have been surprised if Thomas was the next to follow in Newt’s footsteps and start to beg to join him.

Thomas scared everybody and he scared himself. But he was also scared to forget Newt. To forget his voice, his laugh, and eventually his face. To forget the tender affectionate looks he would give Thomas, to forget how his hand would so perfectly encase his own. How soft his pale, freckle splashed skin was.

So he took it in his stride. Ignoring the weird looks he would get when he talked to himself.

One night, he could be found, as usual, wide awake, siting with his back against a tree.

He was alone, as far as any onlookers were concerned but not to him. To him Newt sat against his shoulder, using a hand to cover his own.

Thomas rested his head on his knees, swinging his clasped hands back and forth and watching the stars. He needed sleep, desperately, but none would come.

“Tommy.” The soft voice echoed around the clearing. At first he thought it was inside his head like all the other times Newt spoke to him. Yet the voice came again, a little clearer yet still just as soft.

“Tommy.”

Thomas raised his head and felt his heart begin to thump as he saw a pale, hazy Newt standing in front of him. He seemed to be outlined in pure starlight. His footsteps made no sound as he walked. Thomas was frozen, unsure what to do.

“Newt?”

“I need to talk to you Tommy.”

He kneeled in front of him, his face just as beautiful as it had been in life.

“Tommy…you have to let me go.”

Thomas shook his head, “I can’t, I don’t want to forget you.”

Newt gave him a sad smile, “you won’t, there’ll always be part of me with you.” He curled his had into a fist and placed it over Thomas’ heart. Thomas could almost feel the pressure, though the ghost of the boy was not really part of this world.

“Please Tommy, you can’t live like this, I won’t let you.”

“I can’t, I can’t.” He lowered his head, his gaze swimming. Newt used a pale hand to touch Thomas cheek lightly and almost urge his face upwards though no pressure was used.

“You have to live, okay, for both of us, do all the things we said we’d do, and I’ll be right beside you as it happens.”

Thomas drew in a shaky breath, not cared when his reply sounded childish, “Promise?”

Newt smiled, “I promise.”

He got to his feet again but Thomas reached out a hand.

“Please, stay.”

“For the night?”

“Forever.”

Newt moved back to him, “if I could, I would, but I need to rest now and you need to live, alright.” He leaned in and brushed his ghostly lips against Thomas’.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” Thomas replied shakily.

Newt smiled before his hand was removed from his cheek and he seemed to melt back into the night.

The place where his lips had brushed Thomas’ own seemed warm though that couldn’t be real. Thomas pushed himself to his feet, surprised as Minho emerged from the undergrowth. By the look on his face he had been followed. And it seemed that his longing mind had created another world for him.

Minho gave Thomas a sad, sorry look before opening his arms wide. Thomas walked into them and the two stood there for a moment, hugging each other, sharing the loss of their friend and thanking each other for still being alive.

Yet what Newt said echoed throughout his mind, ‘You have to live, okay, for both of us’. So he did. He remembered the many daydreams him and the blond had dreamed up in the glade. Of wide green field and blue oceans. Of tall trees and beautiful marshes. Newt had always wanted to write a story, that’s what came to mind first.

He fished out the boys journal from his bag and began flipping through some notes before finding a sweet, edited account of their time in the glade and the scorch. After nagging Jorge to give him an empty book he had found a few days back, he gently pulled out the pages and placed them in the new book. Then he added his own shaky illustrations. The two of them lying in the deadheads admiring the trees, Minho pushing Gally into a river when he had annoyed him, Chuck following Thomas around the glade, laden with all kinds of items.

He worked hard, using things he found in the haven to colour the pictures. When he reached the end he carefully scrawled out a few stories of the safe haven.

‘So in the end, it ended out okay. Newt got a well deserved rest and me and the others are safe and happy.’

This was accompanied by a drawing of all the gladers, arm in arm with a pale version of Newt, Alby, Chuck, Teresa, Winston and all the others whose names were carved into that stone, standing beside their friends.

Then he closed the book and wrote of the front cover.

‘Beyond the glade by Thomas and Newt’

As he wrote the title, he could almost feel the soft fingers stroke his cheek and he smiled. Smiled for the first time in weeks. Smiled because everything had turned out okay after all. Newt would never really be gone. He was with them all. With Chuck and Alby and Teresa and Winston and Zart and Ben and all the others. They were with them all. In their hearts.

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themotherofhorses · 2 years ago

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Hi ! I have so many questions about your Aemond (I like him a lot).

We know he's a scholar, and probably a nerd, do you think he was a secret romantic when he was younger ? As in, reading love stories, dreaming of being a knight in shining armor for his love ? Maybe because he had some naive vision of love, but also maybe because he desperately needed to believe that someone out there would love him for who he is ? That, by being "just" Aemond, he would be worthy of love ?

Is Handmaid his first love ? Or did he fall in love before ? And, if yes, with who ?

Did his parents marriage influence his visions of relationship ? Like, because he saw how sad his mother was, or how his father didn't care for her, maybe he resented the idea of love or/and marriage and swear to himself he would never fall for any of the romance thing ? (I know it's quite the opposite from 1, but I think one can dream of love while being heartbroken knowing/thinking it's just an illusion)

Is your Aemond on the Ace spectrum (demisexual perhaps) ? Was handmaid the first(or one of the rare women) who made him crave physical intimacy because he felt emotionally connected/safe with her ?

What are the names of the children ?

I think that is all. Thank you so much for your writing, I can't wait to read the rest of the story ^^

Have a nice day !

Hello my love <333 I love my Aemond a lot too, he's just an absolute joy to write and talk about.

Perhaps Aemond turned to sappy and lovesick fairytales to cope with his environment and the constant teasing/bullying he endured. Obviously, the loss of his eye changes that, as he feels too scarred and ugly for any highborn lady's love and affection. But I think a piece deep down inside him still yearns for pure and true love. A boyish innocence that hangs on like a lil parasite.

Handmaid is his first love, yes! His first and only love because Aemond is a loyal and devoted mf.

I feel that both his parents' and siblings’ marriages heavily influenced his own perspective on relationships and love and his own future wedding, but not in the sense that he dreads falling in love. Aemond is no fool; he knows little to no love is shared between his parents. It is completely obvious. But in the SFW headcanons I posted last week, I also discussed how memories of Helaena’s first pregnancy are an encouragement to be a good and involved father to his and handmaid’s children. Aemond uses his father and Aegon as a “what not to do” to his handmaid.

As a demisexual myself, I wholeheartedly believe that Aemond is demi too. Like absolutely NO doubt about it. I imagine his exposure to sexual abuse on his thirteenth birthday is the key reason he no longer feels any sexual attraction (or craves intimacy) unless there is a strong bond filled with love, comfort, and security. And handmaid gives him AALLLLL that. She eventually becomes his anchor, happiness, and safe space- his best friend and confidant. They’re not just lovers. Her soft touches and kind words touch him like nothing ever has before. Sappy, sure, but Aemond deserves it.

(I picture him during the first few months of her as his handmaid, he just stares at her. Absolutely taken, falling head over heels in love. When she fixes his beloved eyepatch, it’s a sign to Aemond that, “Yup, she’s the one.”)

What are the children’s names? Honestly, I don’t know! I haven’t gotten around to naming them, although a sweet anon sent me possible baby names (Helaenys, Alyce, and Alyssa, which I totally love), but I’m always open to more suggestions from y’all! I mentioned that Aemond wishes to name his daughter after handmaid’s mother, Alys, so their baby girl’s name might be either Alyssa or Alysanne.

I'm so so so so happy you're enjoying the series! I totally fell in love with this pairing so I'm excited to write more parts this week. If y'all have any further ideas, questions, or suggestions for drabbles/one-shots about the two, send them! I enjoy receiving different things regarding our handmaid ☺️

#vic’s asks and replies #handmaid!reader

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funnywormz · 1 year ago

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TOP FIVE MANAGERBOY MOMENTS GO!

OGUGUGUUGUGH LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOOO

(putting below the cut bc it got long and also there are Spoilers for anyone who hasn't finished s5. much like with my lobby boy outfits post i didn't include any bonus or new crew eps here)

5: 5.1 merp and burble + 5.5 the bellhop

combining these bc i couldn't choose + i like them for the same reasons........ i love both of these episodes bc they're full of these "WHERE IS MY LOBBY BOY" moments from the manager lol. watching her desperately fight against the hotel and tear shit up trying to get to him is so sweet. you can tell she really cares abt him here which makes me very happy bc i feel like that wasn't always the case, but he's grown on her big time lol. there's definitely a sense from her here that she would keep on trying to get back to him as long as she's able to. also the way in merp and burble she continuously refers to feeling lost or like she's lost someone when she's trying to remember him......... it's rlly sweet

4: 4.3 - the habers

ik this is purely an observation by madam hotel but it counts. this is just a straight up admission from her that the lobby boy feels romantic love or something like it for the manager. it's sad as well bc i think this is kinda before the manager began to reciprocate any of those feelings, so it's a depiction of an unrequited, sad, confused sort of love. but it's love nonetheless. also the "it keeps him warm in his little closet" line is so sweet. it's so cute and a little tragic to imagine him sitting in the closet just daydreaming abt her.........

3: 4.18 - she's always been here (1)

i don't see many ppl talking abt this moment but it's one of my favourites with them. there's something so sweet and sad abt how the lobby boy just wants to help her and make her feel better even though he knows he can't. also him just straight up saying that he belongs with her auugugugh...... they're a set do not separate.........

2: 4.18 - she's always been here (2)

when they see what happens to the owner and they realise they're gonna be separated too........ MAN.......... literally heart breaking. the way they cry out for each other as they're pulled away........ the manager literally pleading trying to save him and screaming when he's gone, i think it's the most emotional we've ever seen her get abt like...... anything ever. she cares abt him so much. also the statement "i wish we were alone" from the lobby boy is so intriguing to me. to me it implies that he wants to be away from the hotel, that he wants to be somewhere where him and the manager (and maybe the owner idk) can just be by themselves without being constantly watched and tampered with and killed. it suggests a desire to be free from surveillance and maybe freedom from the hotel herself? i think it's the only time any of the staff have ever verbally expressed a desire to leave the hotel and i wonder if it's going to be revisited in s6.

1: 5.12 - the reaper's envy

they're literally holding hands........ the way the manager calls the lobby boy over telling him it'll be ok and then they HOLD HANDS............ collapses onto the floor. augh. not to get sappy but it's amazing how their relationship has grown over the seasons from the relatively cold uncaring dynamic that it was to something beautiful just tentatively growing bit by bit.......... to me this moment is the culmination of that growth so far. it was so cathartic after they'd been separated for so long too and seeing the manager's desperate attempts to get back to him :'-) man i love them so much........... it's so sweet to see the staff in general express genuine care for each other in this episode <3. the manager especially isn't good at expressing her feelings so this scene is probably the closest thing to a heartfelt expression of love that she's capable of, and i like to think that the lobby boy knows that

#managerboy #the hotel #ask game #anon ask #the lobby boy #the manager

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queenieofaces · 7 years ago

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To build an unimaginable future (or, Queenie is way too jazzed about queer futurity)

This post has been cross-posted to The Asexual Agenda.

This post was written for the April 2018 Carnival of Aces on “All the birds but us...” In typical Queenie fashion, I’m getting this in at the last possible second, but if you can type at supersonic speeds, consider writing a submission as well!

Content warnings: spoilers for a movie that came out in 1939, some pessimistic talk about the future and trauma

In spring of 2014, I was assigned a portion of Lee Edelman’s No Future for a class.

I hated it.

I hated it so much, in fact, that I vagueblogged about how much I hated it. I hated it so much that I decided that I was going to prove Lee Edelman wrong with every part of my existence. Like many things that I start as semi-jokes, it very quickly became not so much a joke as a way for me to conceptualize why what I was doing mattered.

Yeah, this is it. This is the post where I finally talk about queer* futurity.

A disclaimer to start: I’m not a queer theorist and I’m not super well-versed in queer theory in general. I find a lot of theoretical work convoluted and inaccessible (both to the general public and to me specifically), and my training is primarily as a historian and ethnographer. What I’m talking about here is not queer futurity from a theoretical perspective (although there’s been a fair amount written on it from that perspective, including work actively refuting Edelman)** but rather queer futurity from a personal perspective. This month’s Carnival of Aces prompt asks, “How did your (a)sexual and (a)romantic orientations impact your (expected or imagined) future?” and this is my answer.

That said, it’s probably important to explain what Edelman’s work is all about so that you know what I was reacting to. Here’s the blurb from Amazon:

In this searing polemic, Lee Edelman outlines a radically uncompromising new ethics of queer theory. His main target is the all-pervasive figure of the child, which he reads as the linchpin of our universal politics of “reproductive futurism.” Edelman argues that the child, understood as innocence in need of protection, represents the possibility of the future against which the queer is positioned as the embodiment of a relentlessly narcissistic, antisocial, and future-negating drive. He boldly insists that the efficacy of queerness lies in its very willingness to embrace this refusal of the social and political order. In No Future, Edelman urges queers to abandon the stance of accommodation and accede to their status as figures for the force of a negativity that he links with irony, jouissance, and, ultimately, the death drive itself.

Basically, Edelman links futurity with biological reproduction and then says that queerness’s power is negating or denying that future. (He says, at one point, that queerness is defined by having non-reproductive sex.)

There are a lot of reasons to hate this. First, there’s the weirdly exclusive definition of queerness. What about bi folks? What about trans folks? What about ace folks? What about gay folks who have biological children? Etc. etc. etc. Second, there’s the idea that the only way to have a future is to biologically reproduce. I know that Edelman has been (rightly) critiqued, especially by queer scholars of color, for discounting social reproduction--passing on culture and community to folks who are not blood relations, for example. If you want an example from my own studies, there are several medieval Buddhist sects in Japan that have master-disciple transmissions, where the master and disciple are not theoretically*** blood relations but still are part of the same lineage. Third, there’s this general sort of nihilistic, pessimistic way of thinking about queerness. I’m going to talk about that more below so I won’t go into it here.

Anyway, enough about this book that I didn’t like.

When I talk about queer futurity, I’m talking about a way of imagining a future connected to our present that doesn’t rely on biological reproduction. This probably sounds very conceptual and academic, so let me explain with some reasons why I am so excessively jazzed**** about queer futurity:

The first point is a bit of a weird and heavy one, so I apologize for starting with this but here goes: I don’t believe that “it gets better.” I understand that that’s often a comforting thought for LGBTQ folks (it’s the basis of the It Gets Better Project, after all), but it’s not for me. I don’t think that there will be a brighter, better future for me, because experience has yet to offer me any concrete proof that things will get better for me. I’ve known I’m queer for more than a decade, and things haven’t gotten better; they’ve just gotten hard in different ways.

On a related note, as I’ve mentioned before a couple of times, I have no real felt sense of the future and no ability to conceptualize what my future might look like. Part of that is PTSD (trauma does weird things to your sense of time) and part of that is a lack of role models. This is why things like “The Path of the New Woman” appeal to me--as Ito puts it, The New Woman “does not know where this new path originates nor where it leads. Consequently, she understands the danger and the fear that attend the unknown.” The future, to me, is scary but also fundamentally nebulous and unimaginable.

People often mistake me for an optimist, but I wouldn’t say I am. I don’t think the future is inherently a better, brighter place. I don’t think the sun will come out tomorrow.

What I do think is that if tomorrow continues to be dark, the least I can do is make sure that whoever comes after me has a flashlight.

And this is where queer futurity comes in for me--being able to conceptualize a better future not for myself but for the people who come after me, but also being able to conceptualize a way that I am connected to and contributing to that future. Because the idea that I’m disconnected from the future entirely or that I’m negating it in some way? That’s hopelessness. Because if nothing will get better for me, if my future is already so inherently difficult to imagine, and if I will not have any legacy to pass on to the next generation, there’s no point in me continuing to survive. (As I’ve said before, my ability to care for myself goes up substantially when I have other people to take care of.)

So, for me, queer futurity is hope, not that things will get better, but that I can make them better for whoever comes next, that whatever I build (whether that’s resources or community or just plain ol’ relationships with other individuals) will live on beyond me.

Needless to say, a big part of queer futurity for me is conceptualizing alternative families (found family is lovely!) but also ways to have an impact on the next generation that don’t require a family. When I was in my preteens, I saw Goodbye, Mr. Chips and I sobbed through the ending. If you haven’t seen the movie, it follows a teacher at a boys’ school from his first day teaching until his death. On his death bed, one of his colleagues remarks that it’s a shame he never had children, and he responds, "I thought you said it was a pity, a pity I never had any children. But you're wrong. I have! Thousands of 'em, thousands of 'em...and all...boys." (You can find a clip of the scene in question on YouTube.) This appeals to me because I’m a sap who cries about gum commercials***** but also because it’s very much in line with how I imagine my own role as a teacher, an educator, and a mentor.

I am not planning on having children--either biological or adopted. I have no intention or desire to pass on my family name--I’m not on speaking terms with my family, and haven’t been for years at this point. I’m not sure that I’ll ever be in another partnered relationship due to the puddle problem and also due to my drifting further and further into romantically grey areas. As hard as it is for me to conceptualize my future, it’s even harder for me to conceptualize a future trajectory that looks at all normative.****** If we imagine futurity as tied to biological reproduction, I am a dead end.

But here’s where I turn to queer futurity again: if the future isn’t solely predicated on biological reproduction, if my lineage isn’t constrained by my ability or willingness to pass on my genetic material, I am no longer a dead end. Because, you know what? I may never have kids and may never be part of a family, but I have mentees. I have my LGBTQ students and kouhai who’ve reached out to me for support. I have everyone who’s ever read something I’ve written and said, “Hey, this helped me understand myself better.” I have everyone who I’ve helped feel less alone or less scared or better equipped to face down the future in all its frightening, unknowable glory. I have a community I’ve contributed to building, and that will live on past me. I come from a lineage of ace bloggers and activists whose words have educated, comforted, and inspired me, just as I hope that someday my words will educate, comfort, and inspire someone else.

So here’s what it comes down to: I’m excessively jazzed about queer futurity because I can’t imagine a future for myself, but I want to build one that’s better for whoever comes next. I’ve been shaped not only by my biological family but by my community, by my ace and/or queer elders, by everyone who has ever offered me a hand up or a shoulder to cry on. I’ve inherited that legacy and I’m going to pass it on, whether Lee Edelman likes it or not.

All the other birds may have begun their nests, but me? Maybe I don’t need a nest. Maybe there are other ways for my existence to have meaning.

*To head off the inevitable questions: when I talk about my being queer, I’m talking about both my sexuality (or lack thereof) and my romantic orientation. These things are inseparable parts of my queerness. If you are interested in reading more, I recommend checking out my tag.

**Full disclosure: I haven’t read this particular book of Muñoz’s (I’ve read one of his other books) or much of the other work refuting Edelman. I’ve had it recapped to me in seminar by other folks. Like I said, not a queer theorist or a queer studies specialist.

***In actuality, sometimes people fudged their vows of celibacy and had sons who became their disciples. But biological relationships aren’t actually required or expected for transmission of teachings.

****Those of you who follow me on my sideblog: I am so sorry that you are subjected to the endless stream of semi-incoherent yelling and memes about queer futurity but also, like, I’m not actually that sorry and we all know it. As a special bonus for all of you, here is a terrible meme:

You’re welcome.

*****Do you think I’m frickin’ joking? Do you think this is a joke? This is not a joke. I’m so serious about crying about gum commercials.

******One of these days I’m going to write that post on queer time/ace time. It’s going to happen. I’ve said I’m going to write a post on queer futurity for years and years and now I’m finally writing it, so the queer/ace time post will happen one day. Just not today.

#asexual #ace safe #actuallyasexual #Carnival of Aces #queer ace #queer futurity #I have no idea what tags anyone's using anymore 笑 #I barely remember what tags I use @___@#scattered leaking feelings ahoy since I procrastinated on writing this until the very last moment #and then cried while writing it but it's chill #it's a sad post but also a desperately sappy post #my trademark post style....#anyway I wrote this post while listening to 'The Future' by The Limousines if you want some vaguely appropriate background music #cross posted to the asexual agenda

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finniestoncrane · 2 years ago

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I've been binge reading your riddler stuff and maybe it's my fever but I feel sappy. Is it ok to ask for capullo!( that's it right?) riddler comforting a fem reader and letting her know he doesn't just like her physically? Sorry if it's vague I've got super brain fog rn but if you choose to write I recommend going hog wild! Have fun with it pls!

Aftercare

Capullo!Riddler x Female!Reader, word count: 2.1k not vague at all, i get you completely!! and i knew exactly what i wanted to do with this request, so i hope it's what you were looking for! also i hope you get/got better, i'm sorry it took me a while to get this out but bless your lil fevery soul for sending this prompt my way 💚 this is looooong i'm so sorry and it's pretty dialogue heavy which...yeah it is what it is ;-; my posts about this idiot: consistent flops me anyway: i am feeding myself and the capull-hos, i will write 2k words anyway request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi minors DNI!! 🔞 cw for nsfw stuff: language, mentions of sex, angst, suggestive themes, sort of mean eddie, some fluff believe it or not

5.37am.

The light from the alarm clock was soft, the rising sun complimenting the warmth as it shone through your curtains. It was all so incredibly romantic and peaceful, or at least it would have been, if you hadn’t spent the better part of the night before and this most recent half hour being fucked within an inch of your life, Edward rutting like a feral animal into you, onto you, beside you.

He was getting dressed by the bed, lime green suit an affront to your vision in the morning, shirt unbuttoned underneath it, saving that for last. It was only as he slipped his shoes on that you put two and two together, checking the clock again and propping yourself up on your elbow, watching him smooth his hair down and grab his hat from the floor.

“Are you leaving?”

“Yeah, got to.”

“Oh…can’t you stay? Even just for a little while?”

“Uhh…how long for?”

“Well, it’s only 5am.”

“Ok, and what would we do?”

You stared at him in confusion, met only with a blank gaze with a hint of impatience knitted across his brow.

“I thought we could have breakfast together?”

It seemed like such a simple request, 30 minutes to make you both something to eat. But it was met with a scoff and a distinctly mean smile.

“No can do, got better things to be doing.”

Finally buttoning up his shirt, he leant over you in the bed. For the briefest of moments, you were so sure that he was going to kiss you. Soft and gentle on your lips, caring and sweet on your forehead. But instead, he teased back the sheets, exposing your breasts to the room, before winking at you.

“Don’t get dressed, just wait for me to come back whenever I’m done, exactly like that!”

Laying flat on the bed, staring wistfully into the ceiling, you considered your next move.

There was something that kept you coming back for more, despite literally every other identifiable thing about Edward Nygma. His brash personality, perpetual and insistent over-confidence, the way he groped and grabbed, rutted and fucked like a man who had never known of the word ‘gentle’. And those were the qualities you found redeeming. There were no words to describe how you felt about him, deep down. At one point, you had thought the gut-wrenching sadness every time he left after you had sex was a hint that you had developed a bit of a crush on him, a desire to be with him even when you weren’t just satisfying a carnal urge. But recently, it had become more obvious that it was a desperate plea for acknowledgement of you, for him to pay attention to you outside of the clumsy and erratic schedule to which he fucked you.

And he couldn’t even stay behind for breakfast. You weren’t asking for him to confess his undying love. You weren’t even asking him to look you in the eye and make sure you came during sex. Breakfast. That was it. And he had “better things to do”.

So when he texted that afternoon, asking to come over in the evening, you ignored it. It was interesting to note that when the message came in, you darted to your phone at the little chime. And though initially you had been consumed by excitement at the thought of him getting in touch with you, a Pavlov’s whore reaction as you felt your arousal increase at the thought of him, you tossed your phone down without replying. If you were being honest, you were proud of yourself. Cold turkey was tough, and yet here you were, starting the period of radio silence you were willing to keep up indefinitely.

It wasn’t as though this had come out of the blue. You’d had multiple conversations in the past about what you were to each other, what this was. Countless times you had tried to even be friends with benefits, but he wasn’t interested in knowing you outside of coming and cumming and going. So surely, if he listened to anything you said beyond “harder, faster, more”, it wouldn’t come as a shock to him that you were completely done.

But an hour later, another text came in.

“You still asleep? Do a number on ya, did I? 😉 Can I come over later?”

And again, you ignored it. And the six others that came in quick succession at around 6pm.

“Hey, let me know if you’re busy or if I can come and rock your world again!”

“Don’t make me start sending riddles. I know how much you hate that.”

“Come on…if you’re not gonna text back at least send through something nasty 😉”

“I could get food if you want? On the way?”

“Starting to get annoyed baby. I’m not gonna hang around and wait for you much longer…”

“Ok…getting a bit concerned that I might have to find another fuck buddy…”

That last one, a hint of worry in it, made you even madder. If he really was concerned, why couldn’t he take it seriously? A message came in from another number, a mutual acquaintance.

“Hello, this is a weird question (and apologies if the police are reading this) but are you dead?”

Edward had sent his lackeys to investigate for him.

“Hey! I’m great, thanks. No police, no death. Need me to send a pic with today’s paper as proof?”

Nothing in return. And as a final nail in the coffin, you turned your phone off. You had dinner, watched some tv, drowning out any thoughts you had about Ed by periodically reminding yourself that your vibrator was right there in the drawer under the bed, and not only did it finish the job right, it would still be there after you came.

Interrupting your little pity party, though, there was a knock at your door. Peering out the peephole, you could see Ed, standing side on, arm leaning on the door. You opened it slightly, startling him, his body falling into the door with a pathetic little yelp.

“Yes?”

He grinned at you, his arm swooping from behind his back, one bag of some kind of food and a bouquet of flowers. He tilted his chin up and to the side slightly, staring you down and raising his eyebrows.

“Well?”

“What the fuck is this?”

He looked like a told off child.

“I dunno. I thought you were mad at me, so I did what people do when someone is mad at them.” He thrust the gifts forward, eventually bringing them back down to his side when it became obvious that you weren’t going to unfold your arms to take them.

“Do you even know what you’re apologising for?”

He let out a short, sharp laugh.

“Ok, well first of all, I’m not even apologising. So I don’t know where you got that idea.”

You closed the door on him, but he managed to kick his foot in the gap.

“Nonono wait!”

You held it open, looking up at him, the most unamused expression you could muster, desperately trying to hide the raw emotion threatening to expose itself behind your eyes.

“I just want a second, then I can leave if you want me to. Or I…can come in…?” He smirked, letting it fade quickly as he realised now was not the time.

“Ed, there’s professionals who can give you what you want. This isn’t fun for me anymore.” You moved back inside, attempting to close the door again, but his palms pushed it back lightly.

“Wait, wait. Did you actually want me to stay this morning? I just thought that’s what women said after sex…no?”

You pushed past the initial gut reaction, which was to question him on which other women he was claiming to have ever been with, but chose to stay on track with your rehearsed points.

“No, it’s not. But it was stupid of me to think you were interested in anything, or anyone, apart from you and your own selfish needs. Goodbye, Ed.”

The door closed with a slam, but he was persistant.

“Hey! You knew what you were getting into. I was very clear. You know who I am!”

“Yeah, most intelligent man in Gotham. Which I thought might mean you’d have more sense than to just leave after you’ve cum, like I’m absolutely nothing to you.”

“What made you think you were ever going to be something?”

It was harsh, hurtful. The silence after it rang out, and you didn’t care whether he meant it or not. He’d still said it. Slumping down against the door, stopping on the floor, tears fell copiously from your eyes as you accepted the realisation that Ed really didn’t care about you. Never had, and never had any intentions of doing so in the future either. You’re sat there for about five minutes, sobbing against the door, not very mindful of the noise you were making, as you were sure Ed would have left by now. But he spoke again, still outside.

“Please…can you let me in?”

“Go away, Ed.”

“Aw come on! I cam all the way over here with…things for you.”

“I don’t give a fuck.”

“Look, I’m the Riddler, babe. I’ll find another way in somehow, and then you’ll be really pissed at me. I’ll sit out here all night if I have to. I’ll get comfortable now, actually. How about a few riddles? What is red, white and-��

You cut him short, mercifully, opening the door and staring at him, tears wiped hastily away, but eyes still watery, cheeks reddened by the wet tracks. He gestured with his ‘gifts’ again.

“Food’s probably cold by now.”

“I already ate anyway.”

“Right. Can I come in though?”

“Why would you want to? I’m not going to fuck you.”

“That’s fine, actually.”

With your arms folded tight across your chest, you shot him a look of genuine disbelief. He chuckled lightly, holding his palms up.

“I’m serious. I want…” he took a deep breath in, almost pained expression written across his face “…I want to apologise.”

As you held the door open wider for him, he walked timidly inside, letting his palm find your forearm, gripping it once before going inside and sitting down on the sofa, sighing when you joined him, as though he were worried you might stand and berate him, or sit on the armchair, distanced.

“Ok, this isn’t very easy for me.”

“What? Being human?”

“Actually, yes. I’m an outsider, I operate on the fringes of-”

“Ed.”

“Right, right, sorry. I just mean…beyond having to trust someone to not stab me in the back or shoot me in the face, I don’t have to interact or offer myself up to anyone. That’s a lot of vulnerability.”

His words made sense to you, and as the tough exterior you had spent all evening, and most of the past week trying to build up crumbled away, you realised you weren’t that upset about allowing yourself listen to him, offering him your hand, which he took tentatively, eyes avoiding your gaze, but body facing towards yours, open and unguarded.

“I need to put distance between us, because…” as he hesitated, unusually stuck for words, he let his thumb sweep back and forth over the back of your hand, attempting to either soothe you or himself “…I’m scared of how I feel about you.”

“Bullshit.”

“Rude.” He smiled at you, catching your eyeline and looking away quickly. Feeling guilty, you shuffled closer to him, putting your head on his shoulder, hand on his chest, letting your fingers trail up and down. In a move entirely unlike him, he lifted his arm, enclosing it around your shoulder, pulling you closer, his head tilted over the back of the sofa, eyes shut and breath shallow as he continued.

“I don’t feel anything about anyone, except myself. And now you. And before you get excited, I don’t know what to label those feelings as, I certainly wouldn’t get excited about them. I just know that I…care what you think about me and I am willing to…work on being…better.”

It was as good as it was going to get, but even this small gesture of humanity, a display of weakness that you could potentially hold against him, if you were so inclined, displayed his trust and truth.

“So if you’re willing to put up with me, I’m willing to stay.”

“Huh…when you put it that way, it might have been a blessing that you were so quick to leave.”

He was on you, arms around you on the sofa, lips meeting amidst the giggles you both elicited.

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stainedglassthreads · 3 years ago

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I have a very complicated relationship with Asgoriel as a pairing.

I will preface this by saying, if you enjoy Asgoriel because you like sweet, fluffy, happy pairings, I’m not trying to attack you. I do understand that these characters have been through a lot, and people want their favorites to be happy, and for a lot of people, ‘being happy’ means ‘in a loving relationship, as an escape from how life can be rough’. You can scroll past this if you so desire. But I'd be delighted if you ask yourself if the ONLY happy ending for these two characters is ‘in a loving relationship again, possibly with children’.

On the one hand, I don’t like Post-Pacifist Asgoriel stories. I feel like the majority of them skip over the very real issues that Toriel and Asgore have, in an attempt to make Asgore happy, because the author believes the goat dad deserves happiness, and the only way he can acquire happiness is by giving him back the things he yearns to have back. Sometimes with a fankid for extra cuteness.

But not only does this feel unfair to Toriel, who firmly establishes that she does not want to be friends with Asgore anymore... but it feels like it’d be horribly unhealthy for Asgore, too.

In both Undertale and Deltarune, Asgore fixates on the past. To perhaps an unhealthy degree in Deltarune. In Undertale, when he’s forced to confront how recreating his perfect happy family and ignoring all the horrible things that happened is impossible, he kills himself. It feels to me that just shoving him back together with Toriel, and giving him Frisk, a newly revived Asriel, or a new baby fankid, to give him his desperately desired happy family, is not actually giving him a happy ending. it’s enabling his tendency for denial. He’s not actually dealing with his grief, or suicidal depression, he’s pretending that nothing bad ever happened, or something similar. Attempts to give him this ending exactly, or pretending that it’s Toriel’s responsibility to smile to make him happy, feels like it’s missing massive, gaping chunks of Asgore’s character and flaws.

On the other hand... writing their relationship as though they never, ever loved each other also bothers me a lot?

I’ve seen some takes, occasionally, that Asgore is abusive, or that Toriel never loved him. Admittedly, six years after the game’s creation I’ve stopped really seeing them, but they used to be based off Asgore’s reaction to his kids’ deaths, Asgore and Toriel’s behavior in the True Pacifist ending, and the fact that they had separate rooms. I feel like pretending that they never loved each other... misses the point of their whole tragedy, too. Just as much as claiming that Chara was evil and only ever wanted a boss monster’s soul from the Dreemurrs.

Toriel and Asgore were so embarassingly sappy that they had cute nicknames for each other. Toriel, specifically, had at least two or three for Asgore. They were so physically affectionate that they beat the incredibly lovey-dovey Dogi in a nose-nuzzling competition. And they may have had different rooms, but Toriel was so excited about being a mother that she woke Asgore up in the middle of the night to tell him mom puns, and once he had woken up a bit, he laughs at them and tries making puns back.

They loved each other. They were happy together. And then a horrible tragedy hit them, and they both made the wrong choice in dealing with it. And then they both kept making wrong choices. Asgore declared war, and through either his declaration or his own weapon, killed six children that Toriel had cared for. Toriel stayed in the Ruins, unwilling to decisively pick a side between her husband and her children, for fear it would end in watching one of them die. They let an indefinite period of time pass, without really dealing with their grief or their mistakes.

The point of the tragedy isn’t that one was a victim and the other was a horrible person. It’s sad and painful and engaging and compelling because it’s complicated and there is no real ‘bad guy’. Flattening it into ‘well, it was just a little spat and they managed to work it out!’ feels reductive to me, but so does ‘they don’t love each at all anymore, perhaps they never did.’ I think they still did love each other, and they may have been why Toriel was so unwilling to decisively stop Frisk and Asgore’s fight. But also... love is not some magical force that saves people all by itself. It’s just another emotion. Like fear. Like anger. Like joy.

I don’t think Toriel and Asgore will ever truly regain the relationship they once had. It’s a tragedy that impacted the entire Underground for generations. That’s not to say they can’t ever be friends, or even begin a new relationship. But Asgore needs to overcome his suicidal depression instead of relying on a romantic partner to save him, and Toriel needs to learn to take care of herself instead of other people. And I think they both need some time... apart, but not alone. They were both self-isolating for a long time, and I don’t think leaping into a romantic relationship where they rely on just each other for happiness and denial is the healthiest thing. I think they both need more friends than just Sans and Undyne, respectively.

#undertale #asgore #asgore dreemurr #toriel #undertale meta #undertale analysis

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sharktoothedboys · 4 years ago

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Lips Of An Angel, Part 2

Here it is guys!! Part two!! Thank you for being patient with me!! and because you asked nicely I tagging @marshmallow12435 because you wanted to know when I posted!! So here goes! Enjoy everyone!!

====================================================

Shot ran until he thought his lungs might give out, he was hoping he would catch up to you before you even made it to Katsuki’s, if that was where you were even headed? No he couldn’t think like that, He was going to find you there.

There is was, just up ahead, Katsuki’s home, The lights were on, that’s a good sign right? It was almost 2am! Surely that had to mean you were there. He reached the door and began to hammer on it, Frantic, but he didn’t care, He needed to explain, or at least try to.

A very disgruntled Bakugo finally answered the door.

“She doesn’t wanna see you, Asshole.” He snapped a soon as he opened the door.

Shoto was trying to catch his breath on the blondes porch.

“I don’t care what you tell me she said, i need to speak to her.” He managed to get out between breaths.

He tried to push his way past the explosive hero, but to no avail, Bakugo stopped him.

“I said she doesn’t wanna see you.” He said eerily calm.

They angrily stared each other down at the front door, Bakugos grip on Shotos arm tightened, small crackles could be heard and the temperature in the room began to noticeably drop as the two heroes continued their stare down.

“Katsuki...” Your feeble voice came from behind the mountain of a man, “Its ok, i’ll handle it.”

Shoto looked behind Bakugo, his eyes widened in shock and sadness as he took in your dishevelled hair, red eyes and puffy cheeks, he had caused all this hurt, you let out a sniffle and he thinks he feels his heart break, This was all his fault. He snatches his arm away from Bakugos grip and quickly makes his way over to you, reaching for your hands, only to visibly wince when you retreat them from his reach, not letting him hold your hands in his.

“Say what you came to say, and leave.” You said, as you stared at you hands, picking at the loose skin around your nails, a habit of yours. “I already know all the important parts, so don’t try and play the victim here”

“No please, YN. I am not here to try and talk my way out of anything, what i have done is awful” He says sadly, “But please here me out.”

Bakugo interrupts. “I’ll be in the kitchen, YN if you need me to kick this guys ass, just shout.” He makes to leave, but not without harshly bumping in to Shotos shoulder first. Making you smirk a little. Petty, but you didn’t care.

“Thanks Suki.” You mutter, eyes still glued to your hands, still yet to look Shoto in the eye.

Shoto guides you to the sofa and sits down besides you, feeling the pain when you shuffle away from him being to close.

“I love you...” He begins but is quickly cut off.

“Don’t, Just don’t give me that bullshit, I don’t need you to lie to my face as well as behind my back, stop trying to make yourself feel better about doing something shitty. I don’t need your pity and your excuses, If that’s all you have to say then leave.”

“I can’t lie to you anymore, because I truly do love you, Please believe me.”

“WHY SHOULD I?!” You yell, forcing yourself to your feet to pace around, “Give me one good fucking reason as to why I should believe a god damn word that comes out your mouth! You have apparently done nothing but lie to me from the start! Everything you have ever said to me has been a lie, EVERYTHING!”

“NO Y/N!! I never lied to you, everything i ever said was true, every compliment, every i love you, everything was true, just please let me explain.”

“And what? I am meant to be grateful now?” You spit back.

“No, just please...”

you looked down at his desperate facial expression, you could see it in his eyes, sincerity, maybe you should just let him explain himself properly.”

“You have 5 minutes.” You huffed as you sank back down in to the sofa.

“Thank you.” He said, then silence engulfed the two of you, Where did he even begin?

“4 minutes left.” You stated.

“Right” He sighed deeply, “Well as you probably gathered from the phonecall, there has been...”

“No shit Sherlock” You snapped, you were beyond sad now, Shoto turning up and taking his sweet time had just made you mad, in fact it made you furious. He blinked back at your bluntness, he wasn’t used to you not being patient with him or swearing so much, he was taken aback. You had never snapped at him before. “Just get on with it Todoroki or I swear.”

That was it, hearing his family name slip from your lips instead of the usual Shoto made him snap, tears threatening to pour down his pink cheeks.

“Don’t you fucking dare.” You snapped when you saw the tears. “You have absolutely no right to cry in front of me right now.”

“I can’t help it, hearing you call me by my surname feels like the final nail in the coffin.”

“If you don’t get on with it we’ll both be in coffins.” You muttered, “Now just tell me what you wanna say.”

“There has always been someone else that has also had my heart.” He said, wiping the tears away, “She shrouded my mind and for a while she was all i could think about, even after we met, I just couldn’t seem to get her off my mind, But the closer we got, the more she faded away, eventually I found myself barely thinking of her, and smiling around you a lot more. Just as a I found myself fully falling for you, she clawed her way back in to my life, and it was like she had never left, like I was under some kind of spell for her. I couldn’t bring myself to hurt you, I really was falling hard for you, But I also kept finding myself in her embrace, I am sorry for what I have done, truly, because after tonight’s phone call, I saw you were gone and I just instantly knew, I felt it in my bones that you were the one I needed in my life, the one i wanted and desired the most. The panic that washed over me at the thought of you not being in my life, Imagining not waking up to you every morning, No more loving kisses, no more breakfasts together before going off to work, no more evening cuddles while a forgotten movie played in the background, I couldn’t not have you in my life, and i promise to spend the rest of my life making it up to you, If you could just find it in your heart to give me one last chance, Just come home with me and forget any of this ever happened, to please, just forgive me and let me hold you again.”

A few tears rolled down your cheeks as you cupped his face with your hands, he automatically leaned in to your touch, he looked in to your eyes and gave you a small smile, which you returned, and he closed his eyes in contentment....

“Is that it?” You sighed

His eyes snapped open as you let go of his face, staring straight in to your stoic eyes that gave nothing away. Emotionless.

“Di you really think something like that pathetic little speech was going to get me to come home and welcome you back with open arms, when our whole relationship was built on a rebound that you didn’t even get over? You want me to just up and forgive you after 3 years of deceit? You think its gonna be all sunshine and rainbows? No, I don’t trust you and you want to follow you home like a loyal puppy and play happy families and pretend like none of this happened!!”

You stop to catch your breath, standing and running your hands through your hair, A speechless Shoto sat staring at you as you continued with your rant.”

“What? Nothing to say? Did you not prepare for the possibility I wasn’t going to return to you, what like I am so lucky in life to be with the great Shoto Todoroki? Well, as it turns out, I am shit outta luck! And so are you!! Tough luck Todoroki! TOUGH FUCKING LUCK! This isn’t some sappy RomCom where you say a few nice things about me and I come running back to you, I’m not some pathetic lonely woman who thinks she will never find love again, who thinks she has nothing else in her life worth living for because some asshole cheated on her, I am not someone who has no other options because some lying cheating scumbag bastard strung her along for 3 years, NO! Not me, I have a life still to live, and I don’t need you in it. But I do want an answer, so give me one. Who is she?”

He stared open mouthed at your heavily breathing frame, Should he tell you? Would you kill her? What does he do now? Just as he was about to open his mouth the door opened and he suddenly didn’t have to say anything, In walked Camie, Bakugo’s long time girlfriend, and from the shock on her face and the look on Shoto’s as he stared at her presence, It didn’t take a genius to figure it out.

“Sh... Todoroki... YLN.. what...what are you guys doing here so late?” She asked, a lump in her throat as she did.

You looked from her to Shoto, and you knew.

“It’s you...” You said, “Its been you all along..”

Camie just stands there like a dear in the headlights, her gaze flitting from you to Shoto, begging him with her eyes for an ounce of backup.

“ I....” Tears began to pour freely down her face.

“KATSUKI!!!” You screamed.

“NO! PLEASE!” She lunges towards you, grabbing your arm.

“What? and just let my best friend continue his life with an unfaithful whore?”

You yelled at her as Bakugo shot in from the kitchen, just in time to witness you thro Camie from your grasp on to the ground.

“Woah!!” He yelled, heading for Camie, but you stopped him, “ What the hell is going on here?”

“It’s her” you said calmly looking down at the girl, who was now her knees, crying at your feet. “It’s her who has been fucking Todoroki for almost my entire relationship with him!”

Bakugo just stared down at her, eyes wide, His gaze turned to Shoto, who was sat on the couch, his face in his hands as his shoulders shook from silently crying. Bakugo saw red. His head lowered, his teeth grinding together, His Palms crackling loudly around his balled up fists, He was about to step forward until he felt your hand on his shoulder.

“They are not worth it, either of them.”

He calmed down slightly at your words and touch and looked you in the eye, you smiled and he returned the smile.

“Just one question,” He stated boldly, looking down at Camie, “Di you ever love me? Or did you just choose me to get closer to this bastard?”

She looked up at him, her silence speaking volumes, That was all he needed.

“Get the fuck out, both of you.” He fumed

“But where am I meant to go?”

“Do it look like i give a shit about where you go, end up in a ditch for all I care, why don’t you go to lover boys house with him, Whore.”

“She is no longer welcome at my place.” Shoto said as he stood up heading for the door, not without giving you one last apologetic smile.

“Katsuki, please.” Camie begged holding on to the hem of his shirt from he place still on the floor.

“NO! You don’t get to call me that anymore, Now I aid, get out.”

He bent down grabbing her by the collar of her coat and literally throwing her out the door, Shot still stared at you sadly as the door was slammed in both thier faces. He had really fucked up, and he knew deep down there was nothing he do to fix it.

He stared longingly at the door, until Camie tried to grab his hand, that he snatched away.

“Don’t touch me, this is all your fault, I was just getting over you! I had found someone I could love, who I DID love, why did you haver to come back and ruin everything for me!? I am going home, don’t follow me.”

He storms off leaving her in the street alone to sort out her own situation, He was done with her, he wouldn’t let her ruin his life again.

Back in Bakugo’s house you slumped down on the sofa, your head on your hands, tears wanting to fall but you not quite letting them.

“He isn’t worth it.” Bakugo said in a calm voice, a hand around your back, drawing small circles along the small of it to calm you down. You look at him smiling and padding your eyes with your hands to stop the tears, “ You know I am right.” He smiles down at you.

“Yeah, you’re always right. Aren’t you?” You giggle back at him.

“You know it, sweetheart.” He laughs, “Now come one we should get some shut eye, we are both on patrol tomorrow. You can stay here as long as you need to.”

“Shit, Patrol. My hero uniform and everything is all at that hom... Todorokis place.”

“Don’t worry, make me a list and ill swing by in the morning for your uniform, you have bought the essentials right?”

You nod at him

“Right well I’ll get you some fresh sheets for the guest room, lets sleep.”

You yawned and followed him to the guest room and he got you the fresh sheets he promised and bid you a goodnight as he went to his room.

The next morning, Bakugo was true to his word and went to Shoto’s house to collect your hero uniform and a few other things as specified in the list he asked you to write for him. He arrived, ringing the doorbell and waiting for an answer. He eventually opened the door, he looked like shit.

“Bakugo.” He seethed

“Asshole.” Bakugo replied.

After they exchanged their greetings, Bakugo made his way inside, explaning you had sent him for the bits you needed.

“Is she okay?” Shoto asked sheepishly.

“You don’t get to know that.” Bakugo spat back as a reply.

“Come on Bakugo, at least let me know she is okay?”

“You threw away the right you had to know anything about her or her life.”

Shoto stared down at the blonde as he packed a few of your belongings into the bag he bought with him.

“Oh my god...” Shoto realized. “ You’re still in love with her aren’t you?”

“Always was, always will be.” Bakugo replied without missing a beat, he smiled up at the dual haired man, “ Your loss will be my gain.”

He zipped up the bag and stood besides Shoto. Shoto’s left side began to ignite a little out of jealousy and rage.

“Go ahead IcyHot, do your worst, I’ll just go home and have YN patch me up while i tell her what a monster you are.”

With that said, his flames extinguished, He didn’t want you to think he was a monster, even though it is what he deserved.

“Just treat her better than I ever did.” Shot said quietly.

“That won’t be difficult.”

That stung.

Bakugo stepped past Shoto, leaving him behind with just his thoughts and memories.

He made it back to his house, he entered only to be hit with the smell of bacon and eggs, a smile creeped on to his face, he could get used to this domestic life bullshit, coming home to a cooked meal everyday sounded great. He decided there and then that he wasn’t going to waste another second of his life with out you. He walked in to the kitchen gaining you attention.

“Hey Kats....” You were cut off by his lips slamming down on to yours, You were still for a few seconds while you figured out what ws happening, and then you melted in to his embrace as you returned the kiss, you felt his smile on your lips as the kiss deepened.

He begrudgingly broke the contact.

“You have no idea how long I have wanted to do that.” He whispered against your lips that were still very close to his own, his arms tightening around your waist.

“Then show me, Suki.” You said as you returned you lips to his and kissed him with all the passion you had.

You were sure he has the lips of an Angel

===================================================

@marshmallow12435

There we go guys!! Part 2!!! I absolutely LOVED writing this story, so I hope you all enjoy it too. It deffo my new fave! Please like and follow I would be eternally grateful!!

#shoto x reader #todoroki x reader #katsuki x reader #bakugo x reader #angst #my hero academia #mha #shoto angst #katsuki fluff #lips of an angel #loved this #enjoy #my hero academia scenario #scenario #head canon #fiction #story #part 2

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wasbangtanhome · 4 years ago

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late, late, late | KSJ

banner made by bangtanhome! (me)

Summary: Is he late? Yes. Were you mad? Yes. Was it a special day? Yes, yes, yes! You had everything prepared and you just wanted your boyfriend to come home. Now.

Pairing: Office worker!Kim Seokjin x F(Reader) | also kind of dom!Jin

Warning: 18+. Smut in the form of: pwp, provocative dress, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it hehe), oral sex (M receiving), fingering, use of the word "slut", cumming inside, impact play (ass and pussy). also he used the L word.

Word Count: 4.4k

Author's note: Short and sweet to start off my journey here on tumblr!! I hope you enjoy it and to please please let me know about any improvements. I worked really hard on it! Also my first smut fic! Also, also, there are not a lot of pet names ever since I saw the post about what Namjoon, Jungkook, Jimin, and Jin would call their lover. I got super sappy.

From the kitchen window, you have a clear view of the entrance leading to your apartment that you share with your boyfriend. The sun has set and it's well past dinner time but you have yet to see his face walking up the steps, blowing a kiss at your general direction.

You chew the inside of your cheek. He's late, you thought, peering out the window for the nth time while drying the dishes. You can't help but worry. Seokjin usually calls if he picked up an extra shift, but your phone has yet to move.

Today marks a year of the two of you living together. The year hasn't treated you kindly. A while back, your company had some budget cuts. Your department was abolished and unlike the lucky coworkers that were transferred, you were a part of the handful that received severance pay.

You figured going back to work would be easy, especially with your qualifications. However, you have yet to get a call from any of the places you applied to. With you unable to work, you spend your days maintaining the apartment. Your boyfriend, his smile ever present, told you he would just have to take more shifts.

‘You know, ______, housework is really hard to do,’ he remarked. ‘Besides, I make more than enough money to support us both.’

You smiled at your boyfriend then. It was true, there wasn’t really a need for you to go to work. You eased up on your stress over not finding work and dutifully cleaned the apartment.

You trudged your way to the entrance of the apartment. Head resting on the front door before unlocking it with your key. Seokjin was drinking tea by the window sill, looking as ethereal as ever. He noticed you had entered the apartment, smiling lovingly at you.

Before he had a chance to say hello, you broke the news about what happened during work. Instantly, your boyfriend came towards you, his smile faltering as he saw the state you were in. The fatigue in your bones left you slumped on the ground.

Seokjin did not say a word, opted to close and lock the door behind you before sinking to his knees to meet you at eye level.

‘Hey,’ he murmured softly. ‘It’s going to be okay.’

He nudged your shoulder and you fell to his embrace. This was the straw that broke the camel’s back. You whimper softly as you seize his dress shirt, hot tears falling on his dress shirt, turning the color a shade darker than it was. Your knuckles turned white as your chest rose and fell rapidly, ragged breathing moaning the loss. And yet, your Seokjin rubbed circles on your back soothingly, hugging you tightly, not saying a word.

‘Sorry,’ you remembered mumbling as the coil in your stomach loosened.

‘Don’t be sorry, _____, there’s no reason for you too,’ he whispered back.

Silence fell before he piped up. ‘What do you call a bike that can’t stand on its own?’ he waggled his eyebrows when you looked at him, confused at what he’s saying. It took you a good moment to know that he was joking.

‘Two-tired!’ he exclaimed, laughing at his own joke. You smiled at your lover and before long, laughed along with him; his joy infecting your sadness.

He took out his handkerchief, wiping the streaks of tears away and giving it to you. At his gesture, you snickered before dissolving once more into tears. He had fretted then, worried that he had done something wrong.

‘I’m so lucky,’ you mumbled in tears. ‘Lucky to have you as my boyfriend, Kim Seokjin.’

He smiled softly at your comment, proceeded to pull you in his lap. ‘So, what do you want to do now?’

‘Easy,’ you sniffled, plastering a smile on your face. ‘We order fried chicken and drink!’

Seokjin had looked at you funny, surprised to hear you crave alcohol. Your smile was infectious and he ruffled your hair to agree. ‘That’s my girl!’ he exclaimed. ‘Let’s find you an even better paying job, okay?’

He was so enthusiastic, making the tragedy that happened to you that day seem so… trivial. You got drunk that night, your body not used to the alcohol.

You smile softly at the memory that happened after, your boyfriend’s hair stuck to his face, panting heavily as you came all over him. You try to push the memory away, focusing instead on your task at hand, but the damage was done- you're wet.

You chew on your bottom lip, hands traveling lower, touching your folds.

I’ll just start without him.Something nagged at your brain, and as your fingers sought out your clit, you realize how unsatisfying it would be without your boyfriend coaxing orgasm after orgasm from you.

You moan, anticipation and desperation threatening to consume you. Distracting yourself, you went through your mental checklist again. Skimpy apron? Check. Food? It’s cold because it’s been in the fridge, but check. The line that you’ve been practicing for the past few months to win over your boyfriend? Check, check, and check.

You glance again and the parking lot was empty now, its residents taking space in their respective homes. No sign of Seokjin.

You huff, grabbing your phone and pressing the on power roughly, almost causing it to clatter on the ground. Almost. Your screen flickers on and you see an image of him smiling back at you. You stuck your tongue out at his face, and punched a string of numbers you know by heart.

The line rang for a long time. You were about to let it go to voicemail. At the last second, you hear a tired voice answer you.

“Darling?” Seokjin’s voice was gruff and sleepy. You can make a mental image of him running a hand through his hair. He sounded distracted, probably looking at his spreadsheets as the numbers start to blur together.

"Hi," you try cheerfully, clearing your throat, hoping he can’t hear the anticipation across the phone. You cradle the device between your ear and your shoulder before brushing lint from your apron. "Are you coming home soon?"

Seokjin looked at his watch, knowing something was clearly bothering you. Looking at the time, he scrambled to his feet: 19:32.

"Wh-Wha--?" came the stunned response. You hear Seokjin push his chair back and the familiar beep of his computer turning off. You laugh quietly as you hear doors slam and his voice echoing in the staircase.

"Oh, _____, I'm so sorry. I had no idea what time it was," he pants, high on adrenaline trying to get home as soon as possible.

"I'm so sorry, ______. I'll be home soon. You can start eating without me, okay?"

You feel a grin paint your face, relief that he was at work. "I'm okay! You must be hungry, love. Just glad you're finally coming home. I can't wait to see you. Drive safe!" you exclaim hurriedly, knowing he won’t want to call when he’s driving.

He murmured a confirmation and you ended the call. Seokjin may be late but there’s still cause for celebration. Settling the butterflies in your stomach, you open the fridge door to take out the food you had prepared earlier, heating them up.

You finally see a familiar figure run from his parking space. His dress shirt untucked and he stopped for only a moment to blow a kiss towards you. His hair clung to his scalp, his tie was loose, and his eyes shining with adoration. You waved back quickly before seeing him disappear into the building.

Seokjin expected you to be angry, ready to apologize for coming home so late. At the very least, he expected a hug, you seemed happy enough, asking how his day was in the office. What he didn’t expect was you in an apron… wearing nothing else. His eyes roamed your body, stunned at the lack of clothes, briefcase dropping heavily on the floor.

"Are you going to close the door?" he heard you ask.

Never taking his eyes off of you, he closed and locked the door, sliding out of his work shoes. Like a deer caught in headlights, you can’t help but wonder what would happen if you approached him.

You hear him gasp as you get closer, his face incredulous. You pressed your chest towards his, relishing in his ears turning red.

"Now,” you smirk and grab a hold of his tie. “Would you like to start with dinner,"-- you croon as you fling it behind you.

"-a bath,” you say seductively as you open the first couple of buttons of his dress shirt. “-or me?" you finish, dress shirt completely unbuttoned as you watch his delicious figure.

You don't often see your boyfriend at a loss for words. But this... this was something else. Seokjin opened and closed his mouth, blinking rapidly. You hid your smile behind closed lips, enjoying the fact you’re making him squirm.

"What did you make for dinner?" he stammered, forcing a chuckle.

You waved at the table. "The works, japchae, fried chicken, corn, kimchi… You know, our favourites."

"Huh..." he managed, swallowing. Seokjin knew how hungry he was when he left the office, but he couldn't seem to focus on the steaming delicacies on the table. He turned his gaze back to you, slowly closing the distance between your lips.

"Good answer," you murmur.

"Didn't know it was a test," he whispered, dipping his head back down, claiming your soft lips once more.

You smiled into the kiss, content that he was finally home. His hands stopped trembling as it snaked lower. One hand circled your waist, the other trailing soft circles on your back. You shivered at his delicate touch, arching your back into his hand to feel more.

Seokjin seemed to understand your signal and lifted you up, making your way through the living room to reach your bed. Once you landed with a soft plop, he continued the kiss. Heat was rising to his cheeks as he fully shrugged his dress shirt off, returning shortly to connect his lips to yours.

"Jin, I can't see... it's too dark in here," you whined, feeling your skin burn where he touched your body.

You did not receive an immediate response from your beloved, only hearing the thud of a belt on the floor and you hoped his pants came off with it.

"I think it's the perfect amount of light to make you squirm," he whispers. You feel the mattress sink with his weight and the heated kiss resumes, your hands flying to tug at his hair with urgency. You start to feel feverish from the kiss, trying desperately to connect your hips to something so you can feel the first waves of pleasure. You’ve been waiting for such a long time.

He smiles at your impatience and starts tweaking your clothed nipple. "Off..." you whined, wanting the apron gone.

Seokjin slipped the shoulder straps down. You arch your back and he untied the ribbon holding everything together easily. He threw it over his shoulder and finally, his large palms directly touched your tits. He sucked on a nipple while his hands were busy, roaming every inch of your body. You moaned underneath him, thrusting your chest upwards to give him more access.

"Mmm..." you sigh as his hand travelled south and pressed onto your clit.

"You're so wet already," he released your nipple, chuckling darkly. "Have you been waiting all day? Did you want to be fucked that badly?"

You winced at his words. He continued circling your clit, waiting patiently for your answer. "Well?"

"Yes, darling," you pant out. "I have been waiting all day for you! Ah- and you were late," you whined pathetically.

He chuckled again, muttering apologies under his breath while he continues to play with your clit, your nipple back in his mouth. You knew you were going to get a real apology after you're done, but this was enough.

You felt his finger enter your pussy, testing out to see how tight you were. Your eyelids fluttered shut as he added another finger, eliciting a moan from you.

"Yeah? You like that?" came the breathy response.

Your head spun as he curled his fingers at the sensitive bundle of nerves. His thumb pressed and circled on your clit, his pace getting faster and his thrusts getting deeper.

"Jin, I'm close," you squeak out, squirming at his unrelenting force. Your high was right there, waiting for your undoing. But your boyfriend had other plans and his thrusts stopped completely before you came.

You whined, your hands tugging at his hair dangerously. Frustration swept overr your face as it turned even more crimson than his ears. "J-Jin..." you grumble weakly, catching your breath. Your cunt squeezed at nothing when he removed his fingers completely.

"Wanted to feel you cum on my dick," was his simple response.

In the fog of your pleasure, you weren't aware of his veiny cock rapidly growing harder, tip already leaking precum. You stared, dazed as he pumped his length. You also had other plans when you moved to the floor.

You licked a stripe down from the tip to the base, earning a hiss from your boyfriend. His eyes fluttering shut when you look up, his cock slowly disappearing into your mouth.

You suck lightly at first, taking care that your teeth don't make contact with his sensitive member and begin bobbing to a rhythm. He groaned as you stuffed your mouth with his cock, hands grabbing fistfuls of your hair.

"Ah- ________, ah-, can I move?" he huffed out, unable to form sentences without groans.

You moaned to signal your affirmation and he used your hair as leverage to pull you closer to the base. You struggled and gagged, feeling so fucking full. You whimper as he held you there, his head falling back with a groan.

Seokjin snapped his hips, thrusting deeper into your throat. The sensation made you moan, tears blurring your vision. He picked up the pace when he saw you, loves the view of you struggling with his cock in your mouth.

He loved to ruin you, would never admit that out loud, but seeing his lover whimper and sob because he was too big made him moan. Seokjin was holding your head in place, letting his hips do all the work. You groaned out, the vibrations on his cock almost sent him over the edge.

You knew he was close. In ragged breaths, he was saying how beautiful you were, how well you were taking his cock, how amazing you felt, and all the sweet nothings you often hear. However, when his thrusts turned messy, an indication that he was close, you shifted backwards and his beautiful cock fell out of your mouth.

"Fuck!" he cursed loudly, careening forward. He held your head in place for balance, not wanting to fall, worried he hurt you somehow. However, he was greeted with a teasing grin. "Payback, love," was all you said smugly.

You knew you shouldn’t have pushed his buttons that way. But you couldn't help it, knowing the wonderful outcome that awaits you.

He growled, anger flaring with every second that passed since you denied his release. "Bed. Now,” he muttered under his breath. You obliged at his command, though you did it slowly, never taking your eyes of him

This side of Seokjin rarely comes out to play. He was always worried he'd hurt you.

‘Yeah, that's the point,’ you snorted, recalling the memory of explaining what you wanted like he was 5.

Even still, this was a welcomed surprise. You made a mental note of how you pushed his buttons that day, hoping to recreate it in future events.

You were about to sit on the bed when you turned around, climbing on all fours instead, excited about what he would do to you.

“That’s not what I asked you to do, slut” he chuckled, waiting for you to get settled. You teased your ass, moving it closer towards his dick before pulling back.

You didn't anticipate the first slap, the sound of his palm hitting your skin filling the room. You moaned, wiggling your ass towards his face, eyes shining bright with lust.

"Ah- you like being spanked, huh?” Seokjin said, scratching his chin. “Who knew you'd this much of a slut."

You moaned at the word, loving when he said such mean things to you. Your knees buckled when the next smack wasn’t on your ass. He clicked his tongue as he watched your juices flow out from having your cunt smacked. Seokjin reached gingerly towards your clit, teasing it to ease the pain.

"Oh?" he said simply before smacking you again, this time back at your ass. He alternated between slapping your ass and your sopping cunt, the uncertainty of where the next pain would land causing you to see stars.

You whimpered and whined underneath him. Fully lying on your stomach, your ass no longer in the air. You held a pillow, moaning into it, praying the neighbors wouldn't complain about the noise. "J-Jin... please fuck me."

"Huh, I didn’t know this one could beg," he chuckled. The thought of him being with another slut left a twinge in your chest, but that jealousy subsided when he slapped you hard this time, snapping your mind from your thoughts. There was some shuffling behind you and you felt the tip of his cock on your entrance, Seokjin coating his erection with your juices.

"Shit- it's so slippery..." he said mockingly, "slipping" past your cunt. "I can't seem to get it in."

His teasing left you desperate, clinging so hard on to the pillow that your knuckles started to turn white. And just as you felt the anticipation was too much, Seokjin thrusted into you fully, his girth entering you all at once, not caring that you usually needed time to adjust to his cock.

Seokjin dragged you closer towards him, your legs off the bed. He held your neck down with his arm and thrusted hard into your cunt. Before long, you begged silently as your high approaches, hoping that this time your boyfriend would let you cum.

"Baby, I- I'm close."

"Are you now, sweetheart?" You nodded and whimpered at his question. Your voice was getting higher, moans filling your small bedroom.

And he stopped again.

You buried your face in the pillow to scream. You were so agonizingly close and he denied you just like that. Tears fall out of your eyes now, you hiccup and sob, glaring daggers at him.

Normal Seokjin would've scooped you into his arms, a myriad of apologies would spill from his mouth.

But not this time. Instead, he grabbed your hips with his muscular arms before flipping you over so you lay flat on the bed. His cock went back inside, thrusting slowly while he spun circles on your sensitive folds.

"Please-" You breathe in deep, trying to stabilize your hiccups.

"One more for me?" he asked. His voice low and husky.

You start shaking your head, pleading, no- you couldn’t do it again. You were begging him to let you cum. He continued his shallow thrusts and his attention on your clit. You sigh underneath him, overstimulated beyond belief.

"One more," he insisted and leaned close to your ear. "For one whole year of living together." He nibbled on the shell before moving down to your neck. "Please?" You moan when he sucked on the delicate flesh.

You melted into his embrace and nod. "One more."

Perhaps you should've considered longer. Perhaps it was your lust-addled brain that made you say yes. Perhaps you should not have fallen for his devilish charm. But it’s all too late now as he lay on the bed, and you climbed over him.

"Mmph..." you moan, throwing your head back while you grind your pussy on his cock. You snuck a glance below only to find seeing your boyfriend drowning in pleasure.

You leaned forward and bumped your forehead with his. Seokjin's eyes open gently. He pants quietly as he cups your face, gently stroking it with his thumb. An angelic smile spreads upon his face, love and affection in his eyes. You whined as you continue riding him, trying to chase your own high while helping him with his, picking up the pace.

You were still moving a bit too slowly for his liking so he thrusted his hips to match your movements. It sent shivers down your spine and you moan deliciously.

"Baby, I can't- ah- Jin..." you pant, bouncing and grinding on his cock, just then realizing how close you actually were. You expected the stop, but it didn't make it any easier. Your boyfriend stopped his movements and held your hips firm, causing your body to convulse.

Seokjin sat up quickly, hugging and kissing your face profusely. "You did such a good job, ______." he said, his apologies in the form of kisses. He tucked a stray hair behind your ear. "You were so pretty bouncing on my cock like that."

You sigh and smiled weakly at him, "Can I rest?" you asked meekly.

You hear him genuinely laugh. His friends always said that his laugh sounded like windshield wipers. But to you, it sounded like wind chimes dancing in the summer.

Seokjin grabbed you and laid you down on the bed gently. He turned to his side and stroked your hair. You faced him, a content smile on your face as you also stroke his cheek.

"I love you."

The sudden confession made you halt. You knew Seokjin meant it. However, he does not say I love you very often. He shows his love with physical touch and "have you eaten?" questions that make you feel so happy he cared. But hearing him say he loved you almost made you cry. Almost. You had enough tears for the day.

"I love you too, darling."

You scoot closer to kiss him, tongue asking permission to enter. He groans when they collide. Your spare hand moved down and stroked his softening cock gently but he sprung up instantly.

"I kinda blue-balled you, sorry," you broke the kiss sheepishly. Seokjin just chuckled and continued the kiss, moving on top of you.

“Are you okay for more?” he asked, back to his usual self.

You nodded enthusiastically.

His cock slid in effortlessly, your pussy already wet and stretched out enough to take him in without any discomfort. Pleasure caused your body to groan. You wanted so badly to come.

He held up both your legs and toyed with your clit. He was able to thrust easily into you. He started out slow, making sure that you were actually okay before it turned manic, his cock going in and out of you with such force.

You whined when his thumb pushed harder on your clit, feeling your walls clench at his huge dick.

His cock going deeper and deeper inside you combined with him touching your clit was all it took. You were suddenly right there, at the edge of pleasure before you snap. You yell his name, your voice getting increasingly higher. You look at him with desperate eyes.

"Cum on my cock, ____," he groaned, marveling at how tight you were getting.

He kept the pace and soon, you were moaning his name, your juices creaming his cock. You loved being filled. You were so full as your walls clenched around him.

A few more hard thrusts and he joined you in pleasure. "Ah- _____," he moaned out as your walls were painted white. You winced when you thought Seokjin was going to fall on top of you, though he caught himself at the last second.

He slid out of you with a hiss and ran to get a towel to clean you up. After he was done, the towel was placed in the laundry basket, along with all the clothes that were discarded from the floor. You roll your eyes, knowing how neat your boyfriend was.

He plopped right next to you and you cuddled closer, throwing an arm over his muscled abdomen.

"Hi," he sighed out in bliss, tucking another strand of hair behind your ear. "Happy one year anniversary of living together, my dear."

His head dipped towards your and you both nuzzle your nose at each other. "Happy one year, Jin."

"So," he started, clearing his throat. "I can tell you liked getting spanked. Push my buttons some more and maybe it'll happen more often," he laughed at his own comment., waggling his eyebrows at your direction.

This time, it was you who were at a loss for words. You shook your head, rolling your eyes before snuggling so close to him. You found the perfect spot on his chest, as always, pulling the blankets towards the both of you.

He removed himself from underneath you and stared seriously into your eyes. "I know I don't say it enough,"-- you smiled as you notice his ears turning red again-- "but I meant what I said. I do, love you, ____." He held your gaze and you found the strength to sit up slightly to kiss him.

"I know, Jin. This was enough. You are enough."

You've never seen him so giddy and he kissed your forehead again, finally settling down.

"Good night, Kim Seokjin. I’ll clean the food in the morning," you say drowsily.

"Don’t worry, let me get it. Good night, soon-to-be Kim _____," he whispered. You heard the comment but you were tired to ask what he meant. In the morning, you thought to yourself. I'll deal with that in the morning.

When you finally slept, soft snores filling the room, Seokjin got up, carefully detangling him from your arms. You protest slightly but rolled over, not waking up. He padded softly to the kitchen to put the food away. Washing his hands, he looked to the bedroom once more to make sure you were indeed asleep, before opening his briefcase.

Inside, there was a small blue box and Seokjin opened it gingerly, fearing the worst. He sighed in relief as the band reflected a light coming from outside, still intact even though he dropped it earlier. He closed the small box and placed it back in his briefcase.

Seokjin came back to the room to find you had gotten up, hands rubbing your eyes. “Where did you go?”

“Bathroom and grabbed a glass of water,” he lied casually, praying that you didn’t see anything, his heart hammering in his chest.

You mumbled something and he sighed in relief, putting on a pair of boxers before snuggling you close, kissing your forehead.

All characters depicted in this fic are 18+ and fictional.

Any resemblance is just a work of fiction.

Posted on 04.13.2021 at 11:11am GMT+7.

202 notes · View notes

translightyagami · 4 years ago

Text

James “translightyagami/avoidfilledwithcelluloid” Death Note Fic Masterlist

Hello to all you guys out there. Here is my full masterlist of allllll the Death Note fanfic I’ve written: There are over 120 fics contained within this entire list. I’m going to split it up by chapter fics, one-shot fics, short fic compilations, and gift fics I’ve done for fandom exchanges. The descriptions will tell you what the pairings are (mostly Lawlight, but there’s other stuff too). There are several posts of mine that are loosely defined fic, but I won’t be adding those in this post as they are just … hard to organize lol.

Fics are marked with E if they have explicit content and T if there are textual references to transgender characters. Chapter fics are marked as either complete or currently incomplete. Okay! Here we go!

[UPDATED 11/20/2021]

CHAPTER FICS

sit and stay awhile https://archiveofourown.org/works/31032719 complete Light has a fantasy of sitting in L’s lap, and he’s got a plan to make that a reality.

the art of ink and flowers https://archiveofourown.org/works/35106943 currently incomplete, E, T Light needs an apprentice and thinks he's found the perfect one in young firecracker Mello. Now to deal with Mello's uncle, the strange, mysterious, and - oops! - super hot florist Ryuzaki, who doesn't want his nephew near a tattoo parlor. What could possibly go wrong?

i could write it (better than you ever felt it) https://archiveofourown.org/works/13913043 currently incomplete Light works in the To-Oh university library, where he meets his favorite romantic mystery author, Eraldo Coil, who later reveals himself to be the great detective L. Through the course of their working together to solve a crime, Light finds he might have feelings for L and those feelings might be shared by the detective novelist.

your heart is an empty cup https://archiveofourown.org/works/13027707 currently incomplete Light is the assistant manager of a Starbucks in NYC, and L is one of his most annoying customers. When L accuses Light (correctly) of being Kira, as well as mysteriously asking for his help on a different case, the barista has to decide if he’s ready to get in bed with the enemy – maybe even literally.

the forest holds strange creatures https://archiveofourown.org/works/16442660 complete, E, T Light, a paranormal research grad student, comes to a small town trying to find a mysterious cryptid. He finds L, a 10-foot-tall tree creature, who helps Light discover the greatest cryptid of all: love. The only reason this one is in the chapter fic section is because it includes a Halloween special chapter with the intro of Beyond Birthday into the cryptid AU.

At Your Service https://archiveofourown.org/works/19229524 complete, E, T The Yagami family owns the sprawling, exclusive Hotel Kitsune where all sorts of international espionage agents make their temporary home. That includes the great detective L, whose romantic tension with Light comes to a boiling point when he comes to stay after a long absence.

best practices https://archiveofourown.org/works/21113519 complete, E, T Light has been working his way to the top of the corporate ladder thanks to his own hard work, and his more-than-close relationship with L, the company CEO and founder’s son. Their relationship comes to a head when L challenges Light to open himself up, making him vulnerable to showing the true depth of what he feels for L and his own desire to explore sexual power dynamics.

ONE-SHOT FICS

tell me the truth https://archiveofourown.org/works/12592320 E, T Light and Matsuda hit up a bar after work, and then Light hits up Matsuda for sex, praise, and a distraction from the deep emptiness inside him.

constricting https://archiveofourown.org/works/13721580 E, T Light breaks L’s favorite tea cup in their kitchen, and L eats him out because he loves his husband so much.

tell me I’m good https://archiveofourown.org/works/13986861 E In the middle of the night, L receives a drunk call from Light, hiding in the bathroom at a party. The call, turning from desperate to horny, reveals more about Light than L wanted to know.

if at first you don’t succeed https://archiveofourown.org/works/15119816 E, T Light gave his first blow job and accidentally bit L on the dick. He tries to make up for his mistake by trying again.

let me work on you https://archiveofourown.org/works/15884799 E, T As the result of losing bet to him, Light has to be L’s computer desk – naked and laying over his boyfriend��s lap. Of course, when L gives him another sexy challenge, Light can’t help but rise to the occasion.

alterations https://archiveofourown.org/works/17945957 E, T Light comes to visit his boyfriend Mikami at his fancy law office and suggests they have sex there. When Mikami reacts unfavorably, Light has to do damage control, and it smarts a lot more than he expected.

lizard https://archiveofourown.org/works/18552499 E, T Light meets a beefcake guy at a bar on the anniversary of L’s death, and lets him take him home (Lizard is my death note OC, and the fic was a wonderful commission from @queerical)

Buried Alive https://archiveofourown.org/works/19705540 L and Light live together in L’s underground bunker after the apocalypse scorches the Earth. They watch some VHS tapes and do some gardening.

Our Little Secret https://archiveofourown.org/works/23822881 E After getting his memories, his freedom, back, Light wants to give L a gift: Kira tied up at his mercy. But L isn’t so sure if that gift is the one he really wants.

The Light of the Moon https://archiveofourown.org/works/25052722 E, T L is a vampire and accidentally bites Light, who is haunted by dreams that make him question why he wants L to bite him again (and maybe … something more …)

little animals https://archiveofourown.org/works/26829778 E Light and his werewolf boyfriend L fuck in their backyard garden.

Change OR the one where L and Light get married https://archiveofourown.org/works/27748159 E, T A gift/commish fic for @ohgodplsdontlook. Six years after the Kira case closes, L and Light go have a wedding in the mansion where L spent his childhood summers. They bring the Yagami family, their baggage, and vows to share each other’s secrets.

a divine power https://archiveofourown.org/works/28018197 E L has a particular power that has helped him get confessions from even the most hardened, tight-lipped criminals, and he offers to use this power on Light to get an honest answer to the question "Are You Kira?" Not really believing L's power is real (and also smelling an easy way to lie his way out of being caught) Light agrees to submit to this bizarre investigative power - not realizing that L is about to make him a *very* honest man. (TL;DR, L has a Magic Cock That Makes Anyone He Fucks Fall in Love With Him AU.)

Possession https://archiveofourown.org/works/29232294 E After being killed by his family for being Kira, Light makes a deal with the demon L to get back to the mortal realm - a very, very sexy deal.

24-Hour Gym https://archiveofourown.org/works/29415480 After the yellow warehouse goes (mortally) in their favor, Light and Mikami frequent the same 24-hour gym. Eventually, after seeing all his work out skills, Light asks Mikami if he can bench press *Kira*.

Fantasy of a Fantasy https://archiveofourown.org/works/29729685 E, T While monitoring the Yagami family home for suspicious activity, L catches Light getting off to a dirty magazine and projects what he thinks his main suspect's fantasies might be.

the chains that bind us https://archiveofourown.org/works/32051299 E, T Obligatory post-Yotsuba arc fic where Light is released from the handcuffs, and wants desperately to be back in bondage with L. Features a very creative use of the handcuff chain.

Kept https://archiveofourown.org/works/33334282 E, T Omegaverse AU where Light cooks up a horny evil scheme so that L won’t throw him in jail, and also lets him get that alpha lovin’ he so desires.

so glad you’re home https://archiveofourown.org/works/33977605 E, T L returns from a solo case and he and Light have a purr-fect homecoming together - including some spanking, cat ears, and a shower of sappy affection.

SHORT FIC COMPLIATIONS

hand in unlovable hand https://archiveofourown.org/works/15025058 E Okay so I’ve been answering Tumblr askbox prompts for over 2 years now, and this? This is ALL of the Lawlight fics. There are over 70 Lawlight fics in this compilation, with all the nsfw fics marked as such. Here are somethings you’ll find in this horde: an AU where L is fat; dirty talk; ghost sex; phone calls about buying a house; early morning tea; kissing; spanking; bondage; L’s hair being brushed; and much, much more. If you have wished for a particular type of Lawlight fic, it is probably in this bunch.

Containing Multitudes https://archiveofourown.org/works/17570645 E Like i said, I’ve been answering all types of Tumblr prompts. These are all the multi-pairing fics that are not Lawlight. In over 20 fics, you’ll find Mikalight, Light/Misa, Misa/Takada, Misa/Rem, Light/Namikawa, Beyond/Light, Light/Matsuda, and even a few ones with Light and my DN OC Lizard. All nsfw fics are marked as such.

hereditary https://archiveofourown.org/works/17159354 All the Tumblr prompt fics I wrote specifically about the Yagami Family. About 4 fics long, includes a really nice couple of Sayu and Light sibling sadness fics.

bottom shelf erotica https://archiveofourown.org/works/20899706 E These are the 5 fics that I wrote to fill Death Note kinkmeme prompts. They are few frills, dirty, sloppy, all bottom Light smut fics. Also, since I didn’t want to give myself away on kinkmeme they’re all cis stuff. (because really who else would have been throwing trans smut up there?)

something between us (anyway) https://archiveofourown.org/works/30304620 T, E a slowly updating collection of 10 tumblr fic requests I received for the pairings of lawlight and (my DN OC) lizard/light, covering prompts including omegaverse, coffee shop AU, sexy lingerie, and much, much more.

kinktober 2021 https://archiveofourown.org/works/34235686 E, T updated each saturday of Oct. 2021, these five fics all revolve around lawlight and specific kinky prompts.

GIFT EXCHANGE FICS

your father’s son https://archiveofourown.org/works/15115568 T A Secret Shinigami 2018 gift for AbbodonAbandon. Light and Soichiro have a talk about why Light quit the tennis team. Lots of trans shit in here.

in your shoes https://archiveofourown.org/works/22405516 E A Sexy Enquirer 2019 gift for @pashmina-dhaage. L is a professor who is having a quiet relationship with one of his grad students, Light. When he sees Light through his office window stepping in mud, L rushes to give him the shoes off his feet.

wash it out https://archiveofourown.org/works/22405648 A Sexy Enquirer 2019 gift for @complicatedmerary. Mikami and Light, a pianist and violinist respectively with the same opera company, are carrying on a passionate affair while Light remains married to the opera’s soprano, Misa.

Thank you for Reading, Commenting, and Being Nice to Me About My Silly Fic!

#me me me #subtextual #death note #lawlight #my fic #death note fanfiction #woof! okay!#i know i'm posting at the worst time #but i'm gonna pin this so everyone can see

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theswarmanthology · 2 years ago

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Newton Thorne, 21, A small highway town in the Mojave Desert

"Mostly just participate by talking with friends online through social media, sharing content, and sometimes posting sappy posts on tumblr about them."

Fast Facts: How long have you been a fan?: 9+ years Did you get to see MCR live before this tour?: No, this tour was my first time seeing MCR How many shows on this tour did you attend in total?: 1 Favorite album: Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys/The Mad Gear and Missile Kid Show experience out of 10: 10 Did you cry at your show?: I'm still crying right now

Which date of the tour did you attend? 10/15/22, Night 4 at the Forum

When did you get your tickets for your show? Was it a struggle, or were they easy to grab? 2019! it was easier than i thought, but i still waited forever in an online queue.

Did you attend with anyone else? one of my best friends in the whole world, and my younger sibling, and someone id consider an older brother.

What did you wear? but the most Gender thing i could manage. its got shoulderpads B)

Where were your seats? Nosebleeds on Frank's side

What was your favorite song(s) from the setlist they played at your show? DESTROYA

What song were you most hoping to hear? Did you get to hear it? everything from danger days, so im glad it was danger days night. I was only sad we didnt get Sing.

What was your favorite moment from the show? The moment Mastas of Ravencroft played and my best friend nearly fell down the stairs because its his favorite song. I loved seeing them so happy. I also loved the moments when the entire stadium sang in one desperate, reverent voice.

What was the most unexpected moment from the show? When they played Mastas of Ravencroft

Did you snag any merch? What pieces? I got Piss Gerald!!!!!!!!!

Many fans describe seeing MCR live as feeling like coming home. Did you experience anything like that at your show? I think this is a hard thing to answer with a simple yes. I'm gonna leave a link here to an article I wrote and published on Medium which I think answers this better than I could on this form. it also serves as an answer to the perspective on the band question. This isnt meant to be like, publicity grabbing or whatever I've literally never written anything like this, let alone put it online. I just have been frothing at the mouth while trying to figure out where to put the baggage ive been carrying in my chest cavity since the show, and publishing this article felt like the best way i could lighten the load or whatever. anyways here, read it if you like, its about me finding faith in something for the first time in my life: Newton's Article Here!

If you could change one thing about your show experience, what would it be? i wouldnt change a thing. genuinely.

What advice would you give to people seeing My Chemical Romance in the future? dont expect your eyeliner to stay put. (also arrive a few hours early for the good merch lmao)

Anything we didn't ask that you feel obliged to share or talk about? everything i could have wanted to convey about how truly dear to me this experience was is in that memoir i linked UwU

Thanks, Newton! Be sure to check out their article. Here is where else they can be found on the internet: Tumblr: @kaijumilf | Instagram: Mothr.a

#story #10/15/22 #mcrla4

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waynedunlaptheorgandonor · 4 years ago

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k i woke up to thirteen unread messages, so let’s just do a fucking blanket text post covering everything so that i can go curl up by the fire with my aus and pussy eating fics in peace, yeah?

spoilers under the cut

hi, yes, hello, i’m still chill and hype

“but diz,” you say into my ask box. “how can you still be hype when kang has clearly demolished everything we’ve worked so hard for?”

because she hasn’t.

“but aren’t you tired of kang doing all this crazy, inconsistent writing? aren’t you sick of her doing everything for the shock value and not being true to the characters?”

sigh.

y’all.

don’t come for my girl like that.

call me delusional if you want, but to me all of this fits perfectly within the same narrative, which has been leading to canon from the day she took the helm.

i have already done a thousand and one breakdowns as to why carol getting with zeke was caryl-positive, so i’m not gonna go there again, but the leah thing is too.

“but diz--”

shh, i’m still talking.

picture this: you are a lonely, lonely man who has gone through hell and back, and it took you years to open up to your found family, only for your best friend to explode and the love of your life to go marry a guy who probably worked at medieval times to pay for college, and now you’re all alone in the woods trying to figure out wtf to do with yourself.

you tell yourself you can keep visiting your niece and her mom now and then, but that kind of sucks bc of the aforementioned best friend exploding, and also you and your niece’s mom had to murder a bunch of small children and that tends to be kind of traumatizing to remember, so it’s not the ideal situation

but at least you still have your girl, even if she is in an indefinite LARP game for the rest of her life.

but!

then she says, “actually, i can’t come visit you much anymore, what with the whole community, and husband, and child thing,”

and then you are actually Alone.

and it’s for the first time, because every time before that you at least had your brother, who might have been a piece of shit, but at least he was there.

so you meet some chick on the road. you’re sad, no longer feel like you have a family (after it took you so long to get one that you actually loved), and you’re more alone than you have ever been, and you meet this chick who is a loner like you, and you’re wary at first. the two of you don’t trust each other, bc you don’t trust easy. but over time you start to build that trust, and she offers you companionship that you are so desperately in need of, and maybe you wouldn’t usually be into it, but given the Literally Everything Else going on, it’s like, why the fuck not? you have N O T H I N G left.

so she gives you an ultimatum--her or what little is left of your family. well, your family is scattered to the wind and being around them only hurts you more, and this person is offering you a chance for something new (and when things get rly bad, hasn’t your go-to move always been to run anyway?) so you say okay. you say you’ll go.

except nvm, she ditched you, lol, you’re all alone again! sucks to suck.

skip ahead, you’re back with your family, and your og girl has dumped the LARPer, and maybe things can be good again, except there’s a bunch of people going full hannibal lecter wearing other people’s faces on their own and murdering everyone, and your og girl is actually insane rn due to years’ worth of unresolved trauma, and you’re suddenly a dad, and you’re being asked to make nice with the guy who literally tortured you, and honestly? it’d be hard enough as is to trust again, but this whole situation is NOT HELPING.

so by the time the war ends you are tired, and you are hurt, and you are wary, because you keep losing things that matter. and you got back the one person in the world who mattered the most, except she did some super questionable shit, and you’re having a hard time reconciling it, and finally you just Lose It, bc goddamnit, you’ve earned it, mkay? you are entitled to a little blow up. if she gets to literally blow shit up then the least you can do is yell a little, like damn.

but.

she’s the one person in the world who matters most. a rebound fling over the course of a few months =/= ten years of being soulmates. you’ll forgive her, she’ll forgive you, and the two of you will ride off into the sunset together, almost as if you were suddenly in your own spin-off show.

what a concept?

/fin/

“alright, but diz--”

OH MY GOD HOW DO YOU STILL HAVE OBJECTIONS?

listen. here is what daryl/leah teaches us:

-daryl is willing and capable of having intimate relationships

-that being said, daryl being in a relationship has been a Big Thing for everyone, regardless of who they ship him with, since s1, so if it was supposed to be The Most Important Relationship Ever to him, the juicy parts would not happen off screen. there’s a reason the sex is only implied. they’re not showing it until it’s the Real Thing

-we now know daryl has had sex in the past ten years, so maybe he’ll actually last more than six seconds when he bones down with carol! very good!

-this also teaches us that hoo buddy, y’all have some mixed morals when it comes to these characters. the “daryl would only be in a relationship if he rly loved them, so how could he possibly love carol still?” thing is like. dude. carol is MARRIED during this, and he doesn’t get to see her much anymore. is he supposed to just walk around jacking it while crying for the rest of his life? the man tried to move on, and the tragic thing is that he got screwed over. i do not think this is out of character at all. i think daryl fell in love with carol, she got married, he was lonely, tried to move on and convince himself he could be happy with this other chick (who might be rly cool, who knows??), and then he got his heart broken again, before it ever really healed to being with. the boy is a giant bleeding heart who is getting stomped on constantly, and y’all better stop yelling at him for trying to feel better or i’ll come for you. this is like carol having rebound sex with zeke. if you want your characters to be realistic then you have to let them do human things, holy shit

this is getting excessive, let’s tie it up.

the main takeaways here are:

-no it’s not out of character

-yes it fits the narrative, kang isn’t just throwing spaghetti at the wall and seeing what sticks, it all has a purpose, which is why i’m totes fine with it

-leah might not actually die, which thank god, i thought it was douchey of them to kill off another woman for Man Pain. i’m glad i’ve been wrong about her and connie both

-oh yeah, connie...i have no new feelings on connie

-daryl now has sexual stamina, so we can all update our headcanons now

-“i can’t believe they end the episode on such a sore note! their friendship is almost destroyed, how will it ever recover??” ...how are you surprised? that was...that was literally the description of the episode, my dude. that one didn’t exactly come out of left-field. it’ll be okay, they’re gonna make up. hopefully through a bunch of hyperbolically tragic misadventures. it’ll be a good time, calm down

-there is a FUCKING SPIN-OFF coming, how can you think they won’t reconcile?

-actually it’d be super funny if they were just giving each other the silent treatment throughout the entire thing lmfao

-“have you seen that new caryl show?” “yeah, it’s fucking weird. there’s no dialogue??”

-anyway

-does it help if i said i secretly thought they might fuck the whole time, specifically for the reasons stated above, and i’ve been kinda into it since the promo but didn’t say so bc i didn’t want to get hanged? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-idk y’all, that’s all i got. drink up ig?

i just found out that i’m literally anemic, and y’all are still more exhausting than anything else. it’s okay to just like. enjoy things. i promise.

now if you’ll excuse me, i have aus to dive head-first into. i’m not gonna say a whole bunch else about shit unless it gets rly necessary. i think i will make this blog relentlessly positive out of spite, and will just post fics and shippy gifs. i have a photoshop free trial (thatigottomakeaberniememe), mb i’ll make sappy caryl gifs as practice and bombard you all with them. feel free to come by for cheering up, but i’m not gonna repeat myself six thousand times, either

stay hype, STAN KANG, and get daryl to call carol sweetheart 2k21,

-diz

#the end god bless amen #caryl #caryl spoilers #twd s10 spoilers #dunlap tp

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unlucky-rubber-ducky · 4 years ago

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Nightmares

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Reader

1300 words

Summary/warnings: Really rather sad, nightmares, mentions of earth but no actual death. Super cheesy. It’s late. Sappy ending. Super rushed.

A/N: Hello! I was just kind of messing around with this one. It’s not perfect but it’s always fun to write nightmares. School has also been wild, so I hope you can forgive the long periods of time between posting. A final ‘also’, please always feel free to request something! Thank you so much for reading!

You had never heard the temple so… silent. It was so silent. No masters quietly chiding their padawans, no younglings giggling as they made their way to their next class, no knights celebrating a successful mission. Nothing. Silence.

Jedi lined the halls, creating a path and watching you as you walked by. You soon recognized the twists and turns were leading you to the council chambers, and the dread that had been creeping up on you fell like a rock in your stomach.

You could see the door to the council at the end of the hallway, and you were screaming at your legs to stop, to turn around, to slow down- anything to delay whatever was going to happen once you entered that room. As you neared, you recognized the two figures standing guard at the door.

In Anakin’s eyes there was a fury you had only seen on the battlefield, directed at droids and enemy soldiers. But now the blazing fire was focused on you, and you were sure that if he could get away with it, you would be lying dead on the floor. His padawan stood next to him, deep disappointment and almost loathing in her eyes- ice, to contrast her master’s fire.

“What have you done?”

For a moment you didn’t recognize the voice that echoed through the silent halls of the temple. It sounded more vindictive than anything you had ever encountered, and you wondered how that much hatred could be stored in a person.

“You will suffer.” Oh. You knew that voice. You spoke with it every day. “Greatly.”

The door whooshed open, and you were stepping into the council chambers.

You refused to meet any eyes, instead focusing on the singular empty chair. The chair usually filled by the one man you wished was present.

“Knight (Y/n). You have been charged with treason against the Galactic Republic, and the murder of Master Obi-Wan Kenobi. How do you plead?”

If you hadn’t fallen in love with him he would still be alive. If you had never started this tryst he would still be alive. If you had loved him enough to leave he would still be alive. His death is your fault. You knew this could only end in tragedy.

You took a breath.

“Guilty.”

You gasped as you sat up. You tried to control your breathing, but tears quickly began rolling down your face. Soon you were sobbing, the terrible, guilty feeling in your chest refusing to accept that it was just a dream. Before your brain could catch up you were already out the door, darting the short distance from your quarters to Obi-Wan’s. You had to make sure he was alright. That he didn’t hate you. You didn’t even consider the fact that knocking on someone’s door at one in the morning wasn’t exactly couth.

Of course, that all came rushing back when he opened the door with a confused, sleepy expression and no shirt.

“I-I’m so sorry, I wasn’t thinking, I shouldn’t have-”

“Were you crying?”

“I…” You tried to calm yourself as another wave of tears made their way down your face. Maker, why had you done this to yourself? It wasn’t like this was the first dream you had ever had, since the Clone Wars started it was only one of many- why was it this one that sent you crying and knocking on Obi-wan’s door? “I’m fine. I apologize for waking you, Obi-Wan.”

Before you could turn away, he grabbed your arm and pulled you into his quarters. You protested as he sat you on the end of his bed, moving towards the kitchenette to get you a glass of water. You accepted with a watery smile.

“Now, darling, would you like to talk about why you were crying or watch a cheesy holodrama?” He smiled when you laughed just a little. “Ahsoka tells me the best ones play after midnight.”

His heart broke when you looked up at him from the cup in your hands. You looked so… lost. So sad and lost and desperate for comfort that you refused to ask for.

“Um, could we watch something? Or you can go back to bed, and I can leave, I just don’t want to be alone but I could probably go bother-”

“I promise that you are welcome here. Let’s see what’s on.”

You ended up settling on a reality show titled ‘The Real Smugglers of the Outer Rim’, it was dumb and required quite literally no critical thinking skills, which was exactly what you were looking for. His bed was small enough that your legs were pressed together, and you were painfully aware that Obi-Wan had yet to put a shirt on.

“I had a nightmare.”

“I understand. What took place?”

“I…” What could you say? I dreamt that my very real love for you somehow got you killed? That would be a lot to deal with. “I dreamt that you had died.”

You heard him take in a breath.

“I didn’t realize my death would distress you so.”

You turned to look at him, startled just a little when you met his eye.

“Obi-Wan. You’re not dumb.” His face went through multiple emotions in the span of seconds, and you turned your whole body to face him, suddenly itching to run away. Obi-Wan wasn’t dumb. He knew what you were telling him. In your own emotionally-repressed-Jedi-way, you were admitting feelings that you truly shouldn’t be admitting.

Your heart dropped for the second time that night. This was your dream. This was his downfall. Your downfall. How could you have walked into the exact situation your dream had just warned you about?

You jumped off of the bed, ripping yourself away from Obi-Wan, who looked even more startled than you. You couldn’t exactly blame him.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I just… I really shouldn’t have come. This was terrible. I’m so sorry. I’ll let you sleep. I can’t… I’m sorry for putting that on you.”

“Do you have… feelings for me, darling?”

“I- I don’t think-”

“Please.”

Oh, Maker. Your eyes filled with tears yet again.

“Yeah. Yeah, I guess I do.”

“Please sit back down.” You tentatively sat on the edge of the bed, staying as far away from Obi-Wan as you could. “You likely know I… return your feelings, yes?”

You weren’t sure your heart could take any more.

“I honestly had no clue.”

“Oh.” Obi-wan blushed. “Anakin said it was obvious.”

“Obi-Wan.” His expression was serious again. “In my dream you died because I let myself care for you.”

“My dear, I…” He slowly raised his hands to cup your face, giving you every chance to back away. “I would much sooner die because you cared, than die knowing I could have loved you.” You placed your hands over his, pressing your face closer to his calloused hands. “Plus, not every dream is a vision from the future.”

You shared a soft smile. Obi-Wan was the first to break eye contact, glancing down at your lips in a silent question. You answered by leaning in and pressing your lips to his. You felt him smile into the kiss, and you couldn’t help but do the same.

“Can I stay here for the night?”

“Of course you can, precious one.”

You moved to lay next to him in your previous position, but he easily pulled you up and on top of him. You giggled and rested your head on his chest, calm for the first time since you first woke up. You traced the light freckles that were dotted on his skin, almost in disbelief that the night had turned out this way.

“You’ll be here when I wake up?”

He began running his fingers through your hair.

“I promise, my love.”

#obi-wan #obi-wan x reader #obi-wan x y/n #obi-wan x you #x reader #obi-wan fanfic #obi-wan fanfiction #obi wan #obi wan x reader #obi wan fluff #obi-wan fluff #obi-wan reader insert #obi wan reader insert #star wars fanfic #star wars fanfiction #star wars x reader #star wars reader insert

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