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lawofnamesmedia · 2 months ago

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All things end. Remember us. Thoughts on making Arcadia, CA

This was written as a thread for twitter, so the formatting is... exciting.

I spent ~a month trying to write out something about the end of Arcadia, CA that I could read aloud, and add to the episode. I wanted to use my actual, real /voice/ to talk about the experience of this show, & how important and wonderful it's been. I failed utterly. So. Thread.

Arcadia was the very first AD I attempted to make. I'd done audio content before, & a little bit of script writing, but nothing like this. I, uh, also had barely /listened/ to any ADs. The project really was just diving into something thinking I'd figure it out as I went.

That meant I did everything "wrong"-- I cast /long/ before the show was written, wrote as we went, added & /changed/ characters mid-stream, failed to have any sort of outline for the first ...2 years... & overall just... did not follow best practices. At all.

But. Even with all that. We made something beautiful. & genuinely /good./ We told a story that is by-and-large cohesive & coherent, & mostly wraps up all its plotlines & character arcs. A story that is /brilliantly/ acted w/ fucking /stunning/ sound design.

Actors. All of you. I cannot express how much I've enjoyed working with you, nor how fantastic the work you've done is. You ran with me on all my weird tangents & ideas, and some of the best things in the story are ones /you/ brought to it.

@satyrofstrategy-- finding & casting you was random chance, & a stroke of luck that I'm pretty sure shaped my entire existence as an AD creator. Getting you to perform Shakespearean monologues as a quasi-human ~ * actor * ~ has been a highlight. Also, your villain monologue in the finale!

Vanessa- the notes you hit from the very /first/ recording session as a well-meaning mom who very much as Her Own Issues... You never let Holly be /just/ Niko's mom. Even from the audience's limited POV, she had depth. I kind of wish I'd gotten to play with it more, tbh.

Corvyn- Karin was one of the characters who changed a lot in response to the actor. For me, some of the best bits were when she finally hit the wall & couldn't be Entirely Rational Mom. Your voice when she was trying /so hard/ to stay level but FUCKING STRESSED.

Thomas- Wil's story changed SO MUCH, & you took it all in stride. Going from goofy sidekick to antagonist to villain to redemption arc... he couldn't have been in the hands of a better VA. Thank you. So much. (& thanks for the easter egg for him in the stinger ; ) )

Speaking of changing character stories, Rue! I brought you in as love interest & suddenly you're 2 characters in one. Every recording with Purchaser & Elliot afdl;fdashla. I swear, you didn't even blink when I asked about maybe, uh, being faerie possessed?

@superhumanfoods rolled in 1/2 way thru the story & fundamentally altered its course. Your ability to echo other characters' delivery & the just. Baffling /sweetness/ that is Thomas... & also your fucking comedic timing... & how you jumped in with both feet... Thank you.

Cailen- you love Lia at least as much as I do, & it shows in every second of your performance. You are a fucking consummate professional, & staggeringly skilled actor. I loved your willingness to interpret lines in ways that fit her better. I don't think you ever got it wrong.

(Also, I dearly want to include a clip of them speaking in their natural accent at some point, because despite recording for four damn years, I /never/ got over hearing them go from English accent ((specifically regional but I /cannot/ remember)) to American by way of Alaska.)

Izzy is another actor whose switch from natural accent to character voice made me yell & scare the cats. Your performance as Delphine was /breathtaking/ & often really fucking unsettling. Her playing off Cyrus is some of the most horror-aligned content in the show & it rules.

Nick's take on Camren took a character that was supposed to be a fairly flat 2D bully & gave him this unexpected sweetness & vulnerability. It changed his (& the whole) story for the better. His story became one about how even the "popular" kids holding on for dear life.

Thank you to all the people who took on one- or two-off roles. Especially Daniel who reprized Mr. Sudsworth on basically no notice, & added another terrible father to Arcadia's roster, of a completely different flavor than the others.

...ok. Now I get to try to put into words how much mek & Erik's participation in this project has meant.

mek- on top of Niko being written specifically to & /for/ you, you are responsible for this show being what it is, & /how/ it is.

I'd originally planned to record this all asynch. You suggested trying to do it together over voice, & that was such a formative thing that I can't even imagine having done it another way. Niko's dialog may be largely my internal monologue, but it /always/ comes in your voice.

Your willingness to see this through with me, to record at a moment's notice, to help me sort through plotting problems, & to provide impeccable performances over, & over, & over for /four years/ has been the backbone of this show. There is no other voice I could have written for

& no other person that could have played Niko. Period. You let him be the protagonist, AND the audience stand-in POV. You let his /childishness/ shine through when it needed to, but never deprived him of agency or engagement. You showed his /growth/.

(& you pointed it out when I was losing track of his story in the others.) The fact that I can write his dialog almost without thinking is a testament to the consistency of your characterization and performance, and it's wonderful.

I would not have been brave enough to attempt something like this if you hadn't been cheering me on to try it. & I sure as hell wouldn't have kept going if you hadn't been so good at it I needed to know what was going to happen.a Thank you so, so much.

Lord, Erik how do I even /start/ yelling about you? I barely even /asked/ you when we started working on Arcadia, & now you have how many editing/sound designing credits?? The fact that you jumped in with me & said you'd figure it out as we went... I love you.

Your work on this show is so god damn good. Honestly, it /started/ good, & just got better. You produced an episode /every two weeks/ for 4 years with, what? a half-dozen delayed episodes in that /entire time/??????? And they're all /good/!!

More than that, though, you cheered me (& the show) on at every step. God knows I had more than a few crises of faith, & every time you encouraged me to keep going. You got excited about successes, & yelled right alongside me when good things happened.

I am /joyful/ getting to make things with you. Proud & grateful that you wanted to, & /keep/ wanting to. I am so damn spoiled to work with other editors, b/c you can take my "can there be a cricket tantrum here?" sound design notes and make works of art.

There literally would be no show without you. Not just because I'm not a good enough editor, but because you made the process of creating Arcadia so, so good, and fulfilling. I love you a lot. Thank you.

I'll end by saying that listening to the finale, I've realized that this story is /mine./ It's entirely wrapped up in how I think, & feel, & experience the world. Very honestly, it's a show that got made so I could listen to it.

I am thrilled & proud other people wanted to too.

Editing to add

(Fucking hell, this is what I get for copying & pasting from a Discord thread while in a zoom staff meeting.)

Rhys came in with like... 9 episodes to go, & ran away with the character such that they got written in even more so I could keep hearing them. You approached endless alliteration with absolute aplomb, & went from "maternal" to educational to fucking terrifying seemlessly.

I /also/ ended up writing more Mr. Baldwin so I could hear SJ be fucking terrifying too. The perfect god damn hateable man. But still charismatic & believable as a "community leader." ALSO the switch to Baldwin/Purchaser made me yell out loud.

I had no intention of adding characters beyond what I'd started with, but then Elliot. & Thomas. & Mr. Baldwin. & the Curator. ...hell, even the Monarch himself was an unexpected addition. I was so worried I'd end up with a Cast of Thousands that weren't needed, just b/c.

But every character (& actor!) added was such a net positive, & improved the show in very specific and direct ways that only that character (& actor!) could have done. I'm glad I took the risk. And even more glad you-all agreed to come onboard.

(Ok. that's the pre-written thread. from here on, it's off the cuff emotion. I'm sorry.)

#arcadia ca #arcadia california #arcadia ca podcast #arcadia california podcast #i have a lot of thoughts and feelings #everyone who was part of this is amazing #thank you so so much

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xplrvibes · 1 year ago

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what would you say ARE sam and colby's top 3 most intense videos? like... the ones with the most compelling evidence that can't be easily debunked? i agree with you that the new conjuring videos have some things about them that create room for doubt, but i REALLY like sam and colby's content overall and i think the two of them together are just so charming. so i wanted to see what you consider are their strongest videos. :,)

(I am so sorry for the delay in answering this - I actually had a tough time in deciding what my #3 was going to be and it sent me down a rabbit whole for a few days, so this has been sitting in my drafts while I figured it out!)

So, to preface my answer: I only took their haunted content into account for this because I think that is more of what you were looking for. However, I am of the opinion that some of their non-haunted content (the xplr days and 25x25 in particular) could probably match the intensity of any of their haunted videos, just in different ways...so I am more than happy to do a separate post diving into that content as well, if you want.

When I think intensity of their haunted content, I think of the videos that have moments that feel so charged that you can almost feel the tension, anxiety, discomfort, what-have-you through the screen. There are a lot of videos that have really great moments with neat evidence or great banter with them, but they may not necessarily have that energy to them, or they may have a lot of evidence that is debunkable (ex: Bower's Mansion - fantastic video, huge omg! moment in it, but that omg! moment is very hotly contested and highly debated to this day, so this one doesn't make this list). So, this list - to me, anyway, and please everyone remember that whole thing about opinions - is the best of the best as far as making you feel super tense through the screen while watching.

The Night We Talked to Demons | REAL Conjuring House (2021):

Yes, the og Conjuring video. This remains, to this day, the only haunted video they ever made that made me feel wildly uncomfortable the whole way through. I remember when this came out, everyone was talking about how it felt so different and how it made so many people uneasy and lowkey afraid - and not like, jumpscare, haunted hayride afraid, but that kind of afraid that hits you in bed at 3am sometimes where you swear there's someone watching you from the closet. Yes, they may have been misrepresenting the house and the fact of the story (Ken Burns level of historians, our boys are not), but the genuine thrum of fear and anxiety that ran throughout that whole video was real and unsettling.

Evidence wise, this is kind of the start of a new era for them - this is where they learned the Estes Method, after all. And some of the answers they were getting during the Method? Still creepy to hear, to this day. This is also where they caught the photo of the little boy on the thermal camera.

Amanda is in this, and is being very Amanda-like, yes, but this was early on and it's kind of easy to ignore her more..dubious traits.

This one is just a great watch if you want to be genuinely spooked, feel genuinely afraid for them and what they are doing, and you don't want any yelling streamers or weird wacky games to kind of stop the whole natural flow of things. As far as their 3 trips to the Conjuring is concerned, I am of the opinion that the first trip remains the best, in a lot of ways.

2. Our Haunted Night at Villisca Axe Murder House (2021):

The intensity with this one really comes along with the tragic tale of this house itself, and how that story will make you feel. It's an ugly, sad story and the horrible feeling from the crime that took place in that house is baked into the walls.

The whole place just has an eerie vibe of being wrong somehow, and that really comes across in this video. They tell the story of the house and the people who were murdered in it very well, and very respectfully, and their discomfort with the subject matter comes through as well and all works together to just create a tense, tense atmosphere for the entirety of the video.

Seriously, this video is an exercise in intense vibes.

The evidence in this video was pretty solid - not a crazy amount, but what they did get wasn't really controversial or easily debunkable so that's always a plus.

It's just the house. The house just feels...off. And that off-ness carries a tension and intensity with it that never goes away, through the whole video.

3. Ok, so this is where I struggled greatly, and eventually I gave up and decided that number 3 was going to have to be a 3-way tie, because all of these videos have elements of intensity to them that I feel need to be included. So, without further ado:

3a. A Horrifying Encounter at Black Swan Estate (2022):

The intensity in this video really starts at about 27 minutes in, when the boys discover what a "psychomanteum" is and subsequently put themselves into creepy ass trances. Colby leaning forward with those giant ass night vision pupils of his and muttering, "the way...that they would," for no fucking reason creeps me out to this day.

3b. Our Terrifying Encounter at Most Haunted Hotel (2022):

OK, this one almost didn't make the list because it's less bad intense, and more good intense, if that makes sense. It's a really good watch (and an underrated one, quite honestly), but nothing overly scary happens.

Colby gets busy with a ghost lady and the way it all kind of goes down is super interesting, cause it's almost like he goes into a whole other state of being. Again, nothing bad about this - in fact, he talks about how good the feeling is the entire time. But, it's really strange and intense nonetheless.

3c. The Night We'll Never Forget | Haunted Hotel Del Coronado (2021):

This one almost didn't make the list because of Amanda's shenanigans, straight up.

But the building is fucking creepy. It's trippy, it's weird, it's unsettling...and as they're going through the halls, it starts to make you feel like you're on some kind of trip to another dimension. Again, this is another one where the vibes of the building were so off and so intense, that it kind of seeps through the screen and sets the tone for the whole episode. The intensity with this one is the backdrop, not necessarily the evidence and the content itself.

#asks #sam and colby #colby brock #sam golbach #snc video review #xplr

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ellie-the-oracle · 2 years ago

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TBB s2e13 Review & Discussion - Pabu, A Tropical Getaway

Per Usual, Massive Spoilers Ahead!

Today’s episode was truly lovely. It was a nice break from the heartache that has been the last two episodes. I absolutely adored seeing Omega be a kid for once and have a friend her age. I also loved seeing the Batch just truly relax for once. The tsunami was genuinely scary to me. I never enjoy having to watch a natural disaster in a show simply because of how real an issue it is. It was unsettling to say the least. This episode also set up the possibilities for TBB to have a place to restart their lives and live peacefully, which is a good thing to keep in mind. That being said, I don’t think they are going to do that just yet, there is still cause for them to join the fight (SAVE YOUR BROTHER DAMMIT!)

Cid. Oh Cid. How the mighty have fallen. I used to enjoy her character as this dry and witty “auntie”. But as we have all come to realize, she is quite cruel and uncaring. This is not to say she is a bad character, because frankly she is written so well. But I’m just happy the Batch finally cut ties with her and are going on their own. I will say, though, that I am a bit surprised at how sudden it happened. She is totally going to sell them out to the Empire.

Alright, I’m going to address the elephant in the room. This fandom, while it has its good sides and I love that, needs to chill tf out. There is literally no reason to be going feral over fictional characters like this. it’s not that big of a deal. Everyone is allowed to have their interpretations, their ships and their likes/dislikes without warranting aggression from one another. You're allowed to be upset by today's episode as much as you're allowed to be happy with it. So please, let us remember that the point of a fandom is to bring people together, not push them apart.

Anyways. With that being said, here are my thoughts on Tech and Phee. On the lowest of keys, I’m ever so slightly vibing. Initially (as in her first two appearances, earlier in the season) I was put off by her character because I thought “oh, here is yet another pirate…” I had not been fond of the idea of her being a love interest to Tech simply because I could not gauge her character well enough at the time and therefore did not want to jump aboard the ship. This episode was fantastic in developing her character. I still don’t feel particularly inclined to jump aboard this ship, at least, not yet. However, because this episode gave Phee agency, morality, and drive, (which I seriously appreciated and I love that for her), I can now gauge her character far better and can understand how she and Tech could maybe be a thing in the future if that’s the direction the writers choose to go in. In my personal opinion, I doubt the writers will pursue this sub-plot and if they do, it won't be on a grand scale, considering the focus of the main story. And if I'm being honest, I'm not exactly sold on the idea of there being romance in TBB; that's just me though. But back to Phee, the fact that she is going out of her way to retrieve artifacts important to Pabu’s culture (even if they have no monetary value) just shows the viewers that she is more than just some pirate and that she values things that go beyond money. We live laugh love character development in this battalion.

7.5/10. Great episode, cozy vibes all the way.

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xoruffitup · 3 years ago

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Annette: The AD Devotee Review

So I saw Annette on its premiere night in Cannes and I’m still trying to process and make sense of those 2.5 hours of utter insanity. I have no idea where to begin and this is likely going to become an unholy length by the time I’m finished, so I apologize in advance. But BOY I’ve got a lot to parse through!!

Let’s start here: Adam’s made plenty of weird movies. The Dead Don’t Die? The Man Who Killed Don Quixote? There are definitely Terry Gilliam-esque elements of the unapologetically absurd and fantastical in Annette, but NOTHING comes close to this film. To put it bluntly, nothing I write in this post can prepare you for the eccentric phantasmagoria you’re about to sit through.

While the melodies conveying the story – at times lovely and haunting, at times whimsical, occasionally blunt and simple – add a unique sense of the surreal, the fact that it’s all presented in song somehow supplies the medium for this bizarre concoction of disparate elements and outlandish storytelling to all coalesce into a single genre-defying, disbelief-suspending whole. That’s certainly not to say there weren’t a few times when I quietly chortled to myself and mouthed “what the fuck” from behind my mask when things took an exceeding turn to the outrageous. This movie needs to be permitted a bit of leeway in terms of quality judgments, and traditional indicators certainly won’t apply. I would say part of its appeal (and ultimately its success) stems from its lack of interest in appealing to traditional arbiters of film structure and viewing experience. The movie lingers in studies of discomfiture (I’ll return to this theme); it presents all its absurdities with brazen pride rather than temperance; and its end is abrupt and utterly jarring. Yet somehow, at the end of it, I realized I’d been white-knuckling that rollercoaster ride the whole way through and loved every last twist and turn.

A note on the structure of this post before I dive in: I’ve written out a synopsis of the whole film (for those spoiler-hungry people) and stashed it down at the bottom of this post, so no one trying to avoid spoilers has to scroll through. If you want to read, go ahead and skip down to that before reading the discussion/analysis. If I have to reference a specific plot point, I’ll label it “Spoiler #___” and those who don’t mind being spoiled can check the correlating numbers in my synopsis to see which part I’m referencing. Otherwise, my discussion will be spoiler-free! I do detail certain individual scenes, but hid anything that would give away key developments and/or the ending.

To start, I’ll cut to what I’m sure many of you are here for: THE MUSICAL SEX SCENES. You want detailed descriptions? Well let’s fucking go because these scenes have been living in my head rent-free!!

The first (yes, there are two. Idk whether to thank Mr. Carax or suggest he get his sanity checked??) happens towards the end of “We Love Each Other So Much.” Henry carries Ann to the bed with her feet dangling several inches off the floor while she has her arms wrapped around his shoulders. (I maybe whimpered a tiny bit.) As they continue to sing, you first see Ann spread on her back on the bed, panting a little BUT STILL SINGING while Henry’s head is down between her thighs. The camera angle is from above Ann’s head, so you can clearly see down her body and exactly what’s going on. He lifts his head to croon a line, then puts his mouth right back to work.

And THEN they fuck – still fucking singing! They’re on their sides with Henry behind her, and yes there is visible thrusting. Yes, the thrusting definitely picks up speed and force as the song reaches its crescendo. Yes, it was indeed EXTREMELY sensual once you got over the initial shock of what you’re watching. Ann kept her breasts covered with her own hands while Henry went down on her, but now his hands are covering them and kneading while they’re fucking and just….. It’s a hard, blazing hot R rating. I also remember his giant hand coming up to turn her head so he can kiss her and ladkjfaskfjlskfj. Bring your smelling salts. I don’t recommend sitting between two older ladies while you’re watching – KINDA RUINED THE BLATANT, SMOKING HOT ADAM PORN FOR ME. Good god, choose your viewing buddy wisely!

The second scene comes sort of out of nowhere – I can’t actually recall which song it was during, but it pops up while Ann is pregnant. Henry is again eating her out and there’s not as much overt singing this time, but he has his giant hands splayed over her pregnant belly while he’s going to town and whew, WHEW TURN ON THE AIR CONDITIONING PLEASE. DID THE THEATER INCREASE IN TEMPERATURE BY 10 DEGREES, YOU’RE DAMN RIGHT IT DID.

Whew. I think you’ll be better primed to ~enjoy~ those scenes when you know they’re coming, otherwise it’s just so shocking that by the time you’ve processed “Look at Adam eating pussy with reckless abandon” it’s halfway over already. God speed, my fellow rats, it’s truly something to witness!!

Okay. Right. Ahem. Moving right on along….

I’ll kick off this discussion with the formal structure of the film. It’s honestly impossible to classify. I have the questionable fortune of having been taken to many a strange avant-garde operas and art exhibitions by my parents when I was younger, and the strongest parallel I found to this movie was melodramatic opera stagings full of flamboyant flourishes, austere set pieces, and prolonged numbers where the characters wallow at length in their respective miseries. This movie has all the elevated drama, spectacle, and self-aggrandizement belonging to any self-professed rock opera. Think psychedelic rock opera films a la The Who’s Tommy, Hair, Phantom of the Paradise, and hell, even Rocky Horror. Yes, this film really is THAT weird.

But Annette is also in large part a vibrant, absurdist performance piece. The film is intriguingly book-ended by two scenes where the lines blur between actor and character; and your own role blurs between passive viewer and interactive audience. The first scene has the cast walking through the streets of LA (I think?), singing “So May We Start?” directly to the camera in a self-aware prologue, smashing the fourth wall from the beginning and setting up the audience to play a direct role in the viewing experience. Though the cast then disburse and take up their respective roles, the sense of being directly performed to is reinforced throughout the film. This continues most concretely through Henry’s multiple stand-up comedy performances.

Though he performs to an audience in the film rather than directly to live viewers, these scenes are so lengthy, vulgar, and excessive that his solo performance act becomes an integral part of defining his character and conveying his arc as the film progresses. These scenes start to make the film itself feel like a one-man show. The whole shtick of Henry McHenry’s “Ape of God” show is its perverse irreverence and swaggering machismo. Over the span of what must be a five minute plus scene, Henry hacks up phlegm, pretends to choke himself with his microphone cord, prances across the stage with his bathrobe flapping about, simulates being shot, sprinkles many a misanthropic, charmless monologues in between, and ends by throwing off his robe and mooning the audience before he leaves the stage. (Yes, you see Adam’s ass within the film’s first twenty minutes, and we’re just warming up from there.) His one-man performances demonstrate his egocentrism, penchant for lowbrow and often offensive humor, and the fact that this character has thus far profited from indulging in and acting out his base vulgarities.

While never demonstrating any abundance of good taste, his shows teeter firmly towards the grotesque and unsanctionable as his marriage and mental health deteriorate. This is what I’m referring to when I described the film as a study in discomfiture. As he deteriorates, the later iterations of his stand-up show become utterly unsettling and at times revolting. The film could show mercy and stop at one to two minutes of his more deranged antics, but instead subjects you to a protracted display of just how insane this man might possibly be. In Adam’s hands, these excessive, indulgent performance scenes take on disturbing but intriguing ambiguity, as you again wonder where the performance ends and the real man begins. When Henry confesses to a crime during his show and launces into an elaborate, passionate reenactment on stage, you shift uncomfortably in your seat wondering how much of it might just be true. Wondering just how much of an animal this man truly is.

Watching this film as an Adam fan, these scenes are unparalleled displays of his range and prowess. He’s in turns amusing and revolting; intolerable and pathetic; but always, always riveting. I couldn’t help thinking to myself that for the casual, non Adam-obsessed viewer, the effect of these scenes might stop at crass and unappealing. But in terms of the sheer range and power of acting on display? These scenes are a damn marvel. Through these scenes alone, his performance largely imbues the film with its wild, primal, and vaguely menacing atmosphere.

His stand-up scenes were, to me, some of the most intense of the film – sometimes downright difficult to endure. But they’re only a microcosm of the R A N G E he exhibits throughout the film’s entirety. Let’s talk about how he’s animalistic, menacing, and genuinely unsettling to watch (Leos Carax described him as “feline” at some point, and I 100% see it); and then with a mere subtle twitch of his expression, sheen of his eyes, or slump of his shoulders, he’s suddenly a lost, broken thing.

Henry McHenry is truly to be reviled. Twitter might as well spare their breath and announce he’s already cancelled. He towers above the rest of the cast with intimidating, predatory physicality; he is prone to indulgence in his vices; and he constantly seems at risk of releasing some wild, uncontrollable madness lingering just beneath his surface. But as we all well know, Adam has an unerring talent for lending pathos to even the most objectively condemnable characters.

In a repeated refrain during his first comedy show, the audience keeps asking him, “Why did you become a comedian?” He dodges the question or gives sarcastic answers, until finally circling back to the true answer later in the film. It was something to the effect of: “To disarm people. It’s the only way I can tell the truth without it killing me.” Even for all their sick spectacle, there are also moments in his stand-up shows of disarming vulnerability and (seeming) honesty. In a similar moment of personal exposition, he confesses his temptation and “sympathy for the abyss.” (This phrase is hands down my favorite of the film.) He repeatedly refers to his struggle against “the abyss” and, at the same time, his perceived helplessness against it. “There’s so little I can do, there’s so little I can do,” he sings repeatedly throughout the film - usually just after doing something horrific.

Had he been played by anyone else, the first full look of him warming up before his show - hopping in place and punching the air like some wannabe boxer, interspersing puffs of his cigarette with chowing down on a banana – would have been enough for me to swear him off. His archetype is something of a cliché at this point – a brusque, boorish man who can’t stomach or preserve the love of others due to his own self-loathing. There were multiple points when it was only Adam’s face beneath the character that kept my heart cracked open to him. But sure enough, he wedged his fingers into that tiny crack and pried it wide open. The film’s final few scenes show him at his chin-wobbling best as he crumbles apart in small, mournful subtleties.

(General, semi-spoiler ahead as to the tone of the film’s ending – skip this paragraph if you’d rather avoid.) For a film that professes not to take itself very seriously (how else am I supposed to interpret the freaky puppet baby?), it delivers a harsh, unforgiving ending to its main character. And sure enough, despite how much I might have wanted to distance myself and believe it was only what he deserved, I found myself right there with him, sharing his pain. It is solely testament to Adam’s tireless dedication to breathing both gritty realism and stubborn beauty into his characters that Henry sank a hook into some piece of my sympathy.

Not only does Adam have to be the only actor capable of imbuing Henry with humanity despite his manifold wrongs, he also has to be the only actor capable of the wide-ranging transformations demanded of the role. He starts the movie with long hair and his full refrigerator brick house physique. His physicality and size are actively leveraged to engender a sense of disquiet and unpredictability through his presence. He appears in turns tormented and tormentor. There were moments when I found myself thinking of Conan the Barbarian, simply because his physical presence radiates such wild, primal energy (especially next to tiny, dainty Marion and especially with that long hair). Cannot emphasize enough: The raw sex appeal is off the goddamn charts and had me – a veteran fangirl of 3+ years - shook to my damn core.

The film’s progression then ages him – his hair cut shorter and his face and physique gradually becoming more gaunt. By the film’s end, he has facial prosthetics to make him seem even more stark and borderline sickly – a mirror of his growing internal torment. From a muscular, swaggering powerhouse, he pales and shrinks to a shell of a man, unraveling as his face becomes nearly deformed by time and guilt. He is in turns beautiful and grotesque; sensual and repulsive. I know of no other actor whose face (and its accompanying capacity for expressiveness) could lend itself to such stunning versatility.

Quick note here that he was given a reddish-brown birthmark on the right side of his face for this film?? It becomes more prominent once his hair is shorter in the film’s second half. I’m guessing it was Leos’ idea to make his face even more distinctive and riveting? If so, joke’s on you, Mr. Carax, because we’re always riveted. ☺

I mentioned way up at the beginning that the film is bookended by two scenes where the lines blur between actor and character, and between reality and performance. This comes full circle at the film’s end, with Henry’s final spoken words (this doesn’t give any plot away but skip to the next paragraph if you would rather avoid!) being “Stop watching me.” That’s it. The show is over. He has told his last joke, played out his final act, and now he’s done living his life as a source of cheap, unprincipled laughs and thrills for spectators. The curtain closes with a resounding silence.

Now, I definitely won’t have a section where I talk (of course) about the Ben Solo parallels. He’s haunted by an “abyss” aka darkness inside of him? Bad things happened when he finally gave in and stared into that darkness he knew lived within him? As a result of those tragedies, (SPOILER – Skip to next paragraph to avoid) he then finds himself alone and with no one to love or be loved by? NO I’M DEFINITELY NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT IT AT ALL, I’M JUST FINE HERE UNDER MY MOUNTAINS OF TISSUES.

Let’s talk about the music! The film definitely clocks in closer to a rock opera than musical, because almost the entire thing is conveyed through ongoing song, rather than self-contained musical numbers appearing here and there. This actually helps the film’s continuity and pacing, by keeping the characters perpetually in this suspended state of absurdity, always propelled along by some beat or melody. Whenever the film seems on the precipice of tipping all the way into the bleak and dark, the next whimsical tune kicks in to reel us all blessedly back. For example, after (SPOILER #1) happens, there’s a hard cut to the bright police station where several officers gather around Henry, bopping about and chattering on the beat “Questions! We have a few questions!”

Adam integrates his singing into his performance in such a way that it seems organic. I realized after the film that I never consciously considered the quality of his singing along the way. For all that I talked about the film maintaining the atmosphere of a fourth wall-defying performance piece, Adam’s singing is so fully immersed in the embodiment of his character that you almost forget he’s singing. Rather, this is simply how Henry McHenry exists. His stand-up scenes are the only ones in the film that do frequently transition back and forth between speaking and singing, but it’s seamlessly par for the course in Henry’s bizarre, dour show. He breaks into his standard “Now laugh!” number with uninterrupted sarcasm and contempt. There were certainly a few soft, poignant moments when his voice warbled in a tender vibrato you couldn’t help noticing – but otherwise, the singing was simply an extension of that full-body persona he manages to convey with such apparent ease and naturalism.

On the music itself: I’ll admit that the brief clip of “We Love Each Other So Much” we got a few weeks ago made me a tad nervous. It seemed so cheesy and ridiculous? But okay, you really can’t take anything from this movie out of context. Otherwise it is, indeed, utterly ridiculous. Not that none of it is ever ridiculous in context either, but I’m giving you assurances right now that it WORKS. Once you’re in the flow of constant singing and weirdness abound, the songs sweep you right along. Some of the songs lack a distinctive hook or melody and are moreso rhythmic vehicles for storytelling, but it’s now a day later and I still have three of the songs circulating pleasantly in my head. “We Love Each Other So Much” was actually the stand out for me and is now my favorite of the soundtrack. It’s reprised a few times later in the film, growing increasingly melancholy each time it is echoed, and it hits your heart a bit harder each time. The final song sung during (SPOILER #2), though without a distinctive melody to lodge in my head, undoubtedly left me far more moved than a spoken version of this scene would have. Adam’s singing is so painfully desperate and earnest here, and he takes the medium fully under his command.

Finally, it does have to be said that parts of this film veer fully towards the ridiculous and laughable. The initial baby version of the Annette puppet-doll was nothing short of horrifying to me. Annette gets more center-stage screen time in the film’s second half, which gives itself over to a few special effects sequences which look to be flying out at you straight from 2000 Windows Movie Maker. The scariest part is that it all seems intentional. The quality special effects appear when necessary (along with some unusual and captivating time lapse shots), which means the film’s most outrageous moments are fully in line with its guiding spirit. Its extravagant self-indulgence nearly borders on camp.

...And with that, I’ve covered the majority of the frantic notes I took for further reflection immediately after viewing. It’s now been a few days, and I’m looking forward to rewatching this movie when I can hopefully take it in a bit more fully. This time, I won’t just be struggling to keep up with the madness on screen. My concluding thoughts at this point: Is it my favorite Adam movie? Certainly not. Is it the most unforgettable? Aside from my holy text, The Last Jedi, likely yes. It really is the sort of thing you have to see twice to even believe it. And all in all, I say again that Adam truly carried this movie, and he fully inhabits even its highest, most ludicrous aspirations. He’s downright abhorrent in this film, and that’s exactly what makes him such a fucking legend.

I plan to make a separate post in the coming days about my experience at Cannes and the Annette red carpet, since a few people have asked! I can’t even express how damn good it feels to be globetrotting for Adam-related experiences again. <3

Thanks so much for reading! Feel free to ask me any further questions at all here or on Twitter! :)

*SYNOPSIS INCLUDED BELOW. DO NOT READ FURTHER IF AVOIDING SPOILERS!*

Synopsis: Comedian Henry McHenry and opera singer Ann Defrasnoux are both at the pinnacle of their respective success when they fall in love and marry. The marriage is happy and passionate for a time, leading to the birth of their (puppet) daughter, Annette. But tabloids and much of the world believe the crude, brutish Henry is a poor match for refined, idolized Ann. Ann and Henry themselves both begin to feel that something is amiss – Henry gradually losing his touch for his comedy craft, claiming that being in love is making him ill. He repeatedly and sardonically references how Ann’s opera career involves her “singing and dying” every night, to the point that he sees visions of her “dead” body on the stage. Meanwhile, Ann has a nightmare of multiple women accusing Henry of abusive and violent behavior towards them, and she begins growing wary in his presence. (He never acts abusively towards her, unless you count that scene when he tickles her feet and licks her toes while she’s telling him to stop??? Yeah I know, WILD.)

The growing sense of unease, that they’re both teetering on the brink of disaster, culminates in the most deranged of Henry’s stand-up comedy performances, when he gives a vivid reenactment of killing his wife by “tickling her to death.” The performance is so maudlin and unsettling that you wonder whether he’s not making it up at all, and the audience strongly rebukes him. (This is the “What is your problem?!” scene with tiddies out. The full version includes Adam storming across the stage, furiously singing/yelling, “What the FUCK is your problem?!”) But when Henry arrives home that night, drunk and raucous, Ann and Annette are both unharmed.

The couple take a trip on their boat, bringing Annette with them. The boat gets caught in a storm, and Henry drunkenly insists that he and Ann waltz in the storm. She protests that it’s too dangerous and begs him to see sense. (SPOILER #1) The boat lurches when Henry spins her, and Ann falls overboard to her death. Henry rescues Annette from the sinking boat and rows them both to shore. He promptly falls unconscious, and a ghost of Ann appears, proclaiming her intention to haunt Henry through Annette. Annette (still a toddler at this point and yes, still a wooden puppet) then develops a miraculous gift for singing, and Henry decides to take her on tour with performances around the world. He enlists the help of his “conductor friend,” who had been Ann’s accompanist and secretly had an affair with her before she met Henry.

Henry slides further into drunken debauchery as the tour progresses, while the Conductor looks after Annette and the two grow close. Once the tour concludes, the Conductor suggests to Henry that Annette might be his own daughter – revealing his prior affair with Ann. Terrified by the idea of anyone finding out and the possibility of losing his daughter, Henry drowns the Conductor in the pool behind his and Ann’s house. Annette sees the whole thing happen from her bedroom window.

Henry plans one last show for Annette, to be held in a massive stadium at the equivalent of the Super Bowl. But when Annette takes the stage, she refuses to sing. Instead, she speaks and accuses Henry of murder. (“Daddy kills people,” are the actual words – not that that was creepy to hear as this puppet’s first spoken words or anything.)

Henry stands trial, during which he sees an apparition of Ann from when they first met. They sing their regret that they can’t return to the happiness they once shared, until the apparition is replaced by Ann’s vengeful spirit, who promises to haunt Henry in prison. After his sentencing (it’s not clear what the sentence was, but Henry definitely isn’t going free), Annette is brought to see him once in prison. Speaking fully for the first time, she declares she can’t forgive her parents for using her: Henry for exploiting her voice for profit and Ann for presumably using her to take vengeance on Henry. (Yes, this is why she was an inanimate doll moving on strings up to this point – there was some meaning in that strange, strange artistic choice. She was the puppet of her parents’ respective egotisms.) The puppet of Annette is abruptly replaced by a real girl in this scene, finally enabling two-sided interaction and a long-missed genuine connection between her and Henry, which made this quite the emotional catharsis. (SPOILER #2) It concludes with Annette still unwilling to forgive or forget what her parents have done, and swearing never to sing again. She says Henry now has “no one to love.” He appeals, “Can’t I love you, Annette?” She replies, “No, not really.” Henry embraces her one last time before a guard takes her away and Henry is left alone.

…..Yes, that is the end. It left me with major emotional whiplash, after the whole film up to this point kept pulling itself back from the total bleak and dark by starting up a new toe-tapping, mildly silly tune every few minutes. But this last scene instead ends on a brutal note of harsh, unforgiving silence.

BUT! Make sure you stick around through the credits, when you see the cast walking through a forest together. (This is counterpart to the film’s opening, when you see the cast walking through LA singing “So May We Start?” directly to the audience) Definitely pay attention to catch Adam chasing/playing with the little girl actress who plays Annette! That imparts a much nicer feeling to leave the theater with. :’)

#Adam Driver #Annette #Cannes 2021 #driverdaily #Annette spoilers

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samanthamulder · 3 years ago

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Hello, hope you're doing well, if I may ask, what would you say is you all time favorite x files episode? Or if you have a list or can't decide I'd love to read it too :)

Hi! Hallo! Good evening! :))

First of all, I love you for sending this ask because it forced me to actually sit down and really think about this for once!

I'm gonna answer this under the cut because I know myself and even though I'm trying to keep it short it might turn into a whole novel 🙃

This is so hard because there are honestly not many episodes that I genuinely dislike and a lot of episodes that I love so so very much, so it is hard to choose.. also, I constantly change my mind about things like this. Like, if you were to ask me a few weeks from now, or had asked me a couple months ago, my answer would probably be astronomically different. Anyway, I will name my top 3 as of right now, 21.10.21, here goes nothing :))

1. War of the Coprophages ↪ It is the perfect episode and I don't think I could ever do it justice explaining why I love it so much. I've made a (semi-serious) post about this before so I won't elaborate too much right now. Just know I think it's perfect and for the entirety of the 40 minutes that I'm watching no real life worldly problems exist and I feel pure bliss, all the while smiling like some fool.

2. Never Again ↪ Again, perfect. And again I feel unable to explain properly because I have a) never had an original thought in my life and b) I simply cannot english sometimes. This episodes unsettles me deeply but in a way that ultimately provides comfort because I have seen it so many times and know it so well? It always makes me reflect on myself and that is scary and wonderful at the same time because it doesn't happen often while consuming fiction; I tend to lose myself in stories and forget about real life not the other way around.

3. Memento Mori ↪ Maybe this is only on this list because I have very recently rewatched it, but nonetheless it is a fantastic episode and deserves the mention. I cry pretty easily at sad shows/films/books but I don't think anything else has ever had me sob within the first 2 minutes of watching like this episode does. And then a scene that stands out is when Scully calls Mulder to tell him she's been admitted to the hospital and he just keeps on babbling about the case not letting her get a word in because that's his way of coping and we just see her sighing quietly, looking so exhausted but letting him finish speaking before crushing his heart - that will never not make me feel absolutely bottom-of-my-soul sad.

#inbox #txf #i dont know if i need to say this but just in case: pls dont reblog this thank you #🤡

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recentanimenews · 4 years ago

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FEATURE: Madoka, Wonder Egg Priority, and the Future of Late-Night Magical Girl Shows

Beware! This article contains spoilers for the beginning of Puella Magi Madoka Magica.

It is January 21st, 2011. In the shadows of a witch’s labyrinth, two girls named Madoka and Mami form a close bond. Mami is a magical girl, powerful but lonely. Madoka decides, then and there, to fight by Mami’s side. But then, in the middle of combat, the witch Charlotte transforms into a giant worm and bites off Mami’s head. Madoka’s eyes widen in shock. A broken china cup seeps tea on the ground. Smash cut to the wails of goth rock trio Kalafina as black clouds roil and a single flickering shape strides toward oblivion. Three episodes in, Puella Magi Madoka Magica threw down the gauntlet. Over ten years later, the mark it left is still there.

Puella Magi Madoka Magica was special. But why? Not because it was the “first dark magical girl series.” Sailor Moon, the modern magical girl standard-bearer, became popular not just because of its charming characters but because the show could do things like briefly kill everyone during the series finale. Even magical girl series aimed at younger audiences, like Ojamajo Doremi, tackled subjects like the death of a pet or the aftermath of a divorce. Not to mention the infamous 46th episode of Magical Girl Minky Momo from 1983, when the titular heroine was hit by a truck! Truly, everything has been done before.

The secret to Madoka Magica’s success is that it is not really a magical girl show. It is a suspense thriller cunningly disguised as a magical girl show. It has as much in common with Kamen Rider Ryuuki as it has with Sailor Moon, and was written by Gen Urobuchi, a former eroge game writer who ran in the same circles as Kinoko Nasu and Hoshizora Meteo. Madoka Magica is not interested in the slow process of endearment by which magical girl series ease you into the daily routines of their characters — the weekly monsters, transformation stock footage, holidays, and very special episodes. It presents as such only as long as it takes to put you off guard, and then (clad in the gorgeous raiment of art team Gekidan Inu Curry) it goes for your throat.

So it was that Madoka Magica became the standard-bearer of a new kind of late-night anime. Rather than “cute girls doing cute things,” let’s call this genre “cruel things happening to cute girls.” Take something charming and unassuming, like a magical girl story or a high school slice-of-life show. Populate it with fun, marketable characters. Then set those characters screaming when the real story pops out like a jack-in-the-box. The frisson between cute and scary hopefully generates enough charge to catch the attention of audiences, but — most importantly — audiences don’t have to reach that far to engage with it. That is because these shows are built off those same conventions that anime fans are familiar with. Those conventions just happen to be evil this time.

As often happens in the entertainment industry, the success of Madoka spawned many copies. These projects did not have Gen Urobuchi, and they were often not lucky enough to have an art team as singular as Gekidan Inu Curry. All things considered, they tried their best. YUKI YUNA IS A HERO brought a different former eroge game writer, Takahiro, on board. Magical Girl Spec-Ops Asuka made its team of magical girls a proper military unit. More recently, GRANBELM added giant robots to the stew. I’d say Granbelm is my favorite of these, if only because the giant robots were pretty cool! I’d love to see them in a Super Robot Wars game one day.

Some of the more interesting entries in the “cruel things happening to cute girls” genre didn’t have any magical girls in them at all. Selector Infected Wixoss was a card battle show about teens fighting for wishes; writer Mari Okada smartly changed focus from the cruel system tearing the characters apart to the way that individual selfishness keeps cruel systems running perpetually. SCHOOL-LIVE! featured a group of schoolgirls continuing their slice of life activities within a world devastated by a zombie apocalypse; the anime production was bolstered by a murderer’s row of writers from Nitroplus, Urobuchi’s former stomping ground. Episode 3 — a flashback to teacher Megumi on the day of the outbreak — is a genuine triumph, precisely because it is so earnest. Rather than pushing hard to shock or disgust the viewer, it allows the characters to breathe in the moments leading to disaster and lets the horror come naturally.

Traditional magical girl shows, in the meantime, have been doing just fine. We’ve seen several good seasons of Precure and two fantastic ones, the all-rounder Go! Princess Precure and uneven but groundbreaking Hugtto! Precure. Sailor Moon’s Crystal remake seasons and movies have steadily improved after a rocky start. The first few seasons of magical idol series Aikatsu are charming and introduce a fun legacy quirk that ties together characters from different seasons. Even Ojamajo Doremi has seen a follow-up film that puts the spotlight on the generation who grew up watching it.

Madoka’s successors, on the other hand, are in a trickier place. Some of them have been successful, others have been good, but none have recaptured that lightning in a bottle that made Madoka a hit. Even a recent Madoka Magica series based on a phone game, written by Gekidan Inu Curry themselves, came and went without much buzz.

In the years since Madoka aired, there have been plenty of folks who have expressed their reservations about the “cruel things happening to cute girls” genre. After all, magical girl series can be revolutionary or transgressive without being cruel. Hugtto! Precure introduced the series’ first male Precure (equally comfortable wearing dresses as skating outfits) and featured a romantic partnership between two of its female leads. Go! Princess Precure’s best fight scenes are as spectacular as anything in this year’s Jujutsu Kaisen, yet remain perfectly accessible for its target audience of young girls. Madoka's progeny may have been targeted at older — and often, male — audiences, but outside of some blood and gore just a few of these series were more genuinely mature than the children’s series they riffed upon.

Image via HiDive

I do still see a future for late-night magical girl shows. In 2016, a weird magical girl series called Flip Flappers aired. Directed by animation wunderkind Kiyotaka Oshiyama, it featured two girls in love traveling through many strange and colorful environments in search of macguffins. Hidden inside a candy coating of marketable elements was everything from the Freudian fairy tale theories of Bruno Bettelheim, to architectural oddities such as thomassons, to occult figures like Jakob von Uexkull. Flip Flappers harnessed some of Madoka Magica’s sense of danger, putting its cast into intense and scary situations from the very first episode. But it was not a show about girls being tortured by an evil system; it was a show about girls exploring surreal dreamscapes. A new genre had been created: “cute girls doing weird things.”

Here are the cornerstones for the “cute girls doing weird things” genre: you need girls of course, maybe even magical girls, but the rules behind their magic are nebulous. Rather than take children’s genres and corrupt them, you build out atmospheric settings, drop in the characters, and see what happens next. You give the cast room to express themselves within the bounds of the story, rather than leading them down an assembly line to their doom. The malevolence of Madoka is not off-limits, but more useful still than malevolence is uncertainty. The goal is to unsettle the viewer rather than disgust them.

Image via Funimation

Five years after Flip Flappers, a new show walks these same steps: Wonder Egg Priority, an original series from CloverWorks. Of course, Wonder Egg Priority is aiming at something totally different than Flip Flappers. Its spooky environments are incidental. Its main aim is, through riffing on the work of Kyoto Animation and famed director Naoko Yamada, depicting in full and uncompromising detail the difficult emotional lives of teenage girls living in the modern-day. Those lives just happen to be filtered through an anime lens of trauma manifesting as horrific creatures that have to be destroyed, and girls that need to be saved. Yet to me, Wonder Egg Priority captures the dreamlike atmosphere that Flip Flappers achieved in its best moments — the means by which characters exploring unfamiliar spaces reveal themselves in new and different forms. Despite being made of familiar parts, in execution, I think it is something new.

Somewhere between Flip Flappers and Wonder Egg Priority lies the future of late-night magical girl shows. They should not ever replace the ones made for kids; those do perfectly fine on their own, thank you very much. But in their embrace of uncertainty, I recognize a ghost of what I once felt when I first saw Charlotte’s gaping maw. The sensation that the ground had disappeared, and that — like magic — anything was possible.

What's your favorite recent magical girl show? Are you excited for the newest season of Precure? Does Wonder Egg Priority terrify you on a weekly basis like it terrifies me? Let us know in the comments!

Adam W is a Features Writer at Crunchyroll. When he isn't reciting lines from Revolutionary Girl Utena, he sporadically contributes with a loose coalition of friends to a blog called Isn't it Electrifying? You can find him on Twitter at @wendeego

Do you love writing? Do you love anime? If you have an idea for a features story, pitch it to Crunchyroll Features!

By: Adam Wescott

#Anime #News #Latest in Anime News by Crunchyroll!

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i-am-just-a-kiddo · 4 years ago

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favourite male fictional characters

Thank you @vishcount for tagging me, this was a lot of fun! 💞 I originally planned to follow your example and put ten characters here but suddenly it became a lot more oops. also i hope you forgive me for following your format, it’s neat

I am tagging @isabellaofparma , @the-cloud-whisperer and @sassyassassy!

I chose the characters that impacted me deeply on a personal level throughout my life (often shown by how long my love lasts over the years and if i was inspired to write for them).

In no specific order under the cut:

Legolas

The Lord of The Rings, J.R.R. Tolkien.

I think it’s only fitting I start off with this magnificent guy. Maybe I gotta admit, i’ve just had a crush on him ever since I was like, nine years old? He’s the character I will fight tooth and claw for (though I guess he doesn’t need me to do that). I love Orlando Bloom’s portrayal of him, eventhough he is vastly different from the books. Book Legolas is such a delight as well, he feels so whimsical and playful and his banter with Gimli is just gold. I was sad when The Hobbit trilogy came out and I was so disappointed by how they butchered his character, it just did not feel authentic anymore (maybe I am also just bitter about the forced hetero storyline for him. makes no cents, this elf is GayTM your honour. and he will meet his soulmate Gimli in a few decades). Either way, Legolas is the love of my life, thanks for coming to my tedtalk,

Peter Pan

Peter Pan, J. M. Barrie

Another childhood crush of mine. The gif I chose if from the 2005 movie because we always used to watch it and it is to this day one of my favourite movies. It’s so dreamy, so magical, yet also incredibly sad and sweet. I have this very strange fascination with Peter Pan. There is something incredibly unsettling about him, especially in the book. He represents something every child wants - who doesn’t want to escape their bedroom and fly away to experience magical adventured far from the adult world? And yet he also represents the impossibility of it, the curse he carries around with himself because he will forever stay alone, no matter how many lost boys he gathers around himself. And Wendy - it’s a love that was never meant to grow and mature, it’s a fleeting dream for the both of them. I have seen many different adaptations of Peter Pan and I have my favourites, though I want to give a special mention to the book Peter Darling by Austin Chant. It’s a retelling of the story how we know it, in which Peter returns to Neverland after having finally grown up BUT the main points I want to highlight is trans Peter? Heck yes. Gripping and compelling gay love story with our favourite original lost boy Captain Hook? YES.

Snufkin

Moomins, Tove Jansson.

I have discovered Snufkin for myself only last year, and yet I know he will stay with me forever. In short - I vibe with him, he vibes with me. His anxieties about being with people and longing for solitude? His fear of being loved and being important to someone to a point he doesn’t know what to do with himself? This man just wants to roam freely with his own mind and yet he always returns for something that captures him. Mum, I love him because I have rarely felt this seen before. Also, Snufkin said ACAB.

Prince Jing - Xiao Jingyan

Nirvana in Fire (2015)

This too is a darling I have only discovered recently. I watched Nirvana in Fire this year and let me tell you, it’s the best show I have seen in a long while. It’s absolutely amazing and it also ripped my heart out. All the characters are absolutely amazing and I am still not over it.

To be honest, I contemplated between Xiao JIngyan and Mei Changsu, because character-wise I think the latter is a lot more interesting and compelling. He makes for a fantastic heartbreaking and flawed protagonist.

However I have to admit - it was love at first sight with Prince Jing for me and I’m still lowkey mad abt it rip. Seems like I am not immune to Pretty Prince Propaganda. But apart from that, I adore him for his genuine

goodness,

his almost naive drive to be better and seek justice. He lost everything, and for the longest time did not have anything to fight for. So alone and lost and bitter, it makes me sad how much it hardened him. He is heartbreak and clumsy kindness hidden under a skin of scars that was inflicted by his father and many others. I see his sad cat-eyes and I cry, that’s just how it is.

Edmund Pevensie

The Chronicles of Narnia, C. S. Lewis

I grew up with these books and movies - they have always been part of my life and it will probably always stay that way (only last night I rewatched the first movie and sobbed). Imagine my surprised when I finally watched the last movie about five years ago and was incredibly impressed by how they adapted the book; also imagine my brain suddenly going CASMUND in bold letters at Skandar Keynes’ and Ben Barnes’ performance in that movie. From there, I rediscovered this story completely anew for myself. My favourite Pevensie sibling has always been Lucy (and still is, because I identify with her so much and she feels like home to me); however this new discovery of Edmund’s character was overwhelming. It’s interesting to see characters you’ve grown up with from a more grown up point of view. I don’t want to lay out all my thoughts here, just know I am so heartbroken for him, and so so proud as well. His character arc is amazing and maybe that’s how the last movie makes me even more emotional. Seeing Edmund and Lucy still holding on to Narnia but knowing that that door was closing for them? Not to mention what happens in the later books (we don’t talk about that). Also did I mention Casmund. Here, have my incredibly emo and depressing take on Edmund’s character that I started writing four years ago and which will forever stay a WIP.

Nie Huaisang

The Untamed (2019)

My son. My soul. My bane of existence. The tragic thing about him is, that he does not really exist in canon as I have created him for myself. He’s a secondary character in the show, always so relatable yet still brings the ultimate twist of the story, yet he still remains this incomplete shadow. The movie

Fatal Journey

gave him a lot more and I cried tears of joy and devastation. I don’t know why I latched on to him so much, but apparently he is the one that I project on, the one that feels like he sits somewhere inside my chest. I don’t know what else to say - this year he has been everything to me. I spend a lot of time in his head while writing, and maybe that’s how he’s there forever now. Nie Huaisang saw my brain and went it’s free real estate. All my love for you, you dramatic art hoe.

Sherlock Holmes

Sherlock Holmes, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Ah, another lifelong companion. There are many adapations that I adore - starting from the origin of it all, the books and stories which I have all devoured; the 80s adaptation with Jeremy Brett which was incredibly wonderful; to BBC Sherlock which shaped and traumatised me (I still like the first three seaons but I am too hurt to think about it); to the numerous movies - but by far my most favourite performance is Basil Rathbone as Sherlock Holmes. Somehow he manages to capture the Holmes I see in my head when I read the books, the sharp yet polite eccentric detective, who loves his companion so much and who has desire to help others. Sherlock Holmes will always stay special to me, in so many different ways. He shaped my youth and I know he will stay with me. (also what would you say when I told you he helped me discover that I can, in fact, be queer AND ace at the same time? thanks pal). What else is there to say? Sherlock Holmes is a universe that you can dive into and find many amazing treasures.

Isak Valtersen

SKAM (2015)

There he is, the boy that changed my life. SKAM changed my life. All of the characters did. However, Isak is special for many, as I imagine. I remember winter 2016, when tumblr was flooded by these norwegian white boys kissing in a pool and cuddling and I was like ‘nah’, this doesn’t look convincing. I don’t know what changed my mind but I remember sitting down at last and watching all that was released of season three and it was only downhill from there. I remember starting to follow the real life updates religiously while watching the other previous seasons in between. The one clip that completely wrecked me was when Isak went to the school nurse about his struggles with sleep - it felt like for the first time I saw someone on screen that could understand me on so many different levels. The entierty of seaons three is so personal, I would tell you to go watch it if you don’t know what I mean. The entire show in fact. It’s a masterpiece and it feels so real. This show impacted my life in a way that no show has managed to do before. I miss it so much. I miss Isak too sigh.

Shang Xirui

Winter Begonia (2020)

Technically, for me personally, Shang Xirui is the nonbinary, gay and ace representation I need in my life (or at least that’s my own personal take on him), but since that is not official, he’s still here on this list. Of course he is because wow, it’s been a long while since I’ve seen such a compelling character on screen. I went from disliking him to being absolutely heartbroken over him. I don’t think any other character in this show captured me as much as he did. There are so many layers to him and discovering all of his sides is a wonderful, heartbreaking, painful and also beautiful journey. I’m not sure I understand all of him yet, but I am willing to try and dig and just ponder his existence. This too, is a perfect example for a flawed yet authentic protagonist. Also he is the most beautiful thing on this planet, or at least that’s how I have been feeling ever since I watched this. I wish to write more of him in the future.

Aang

Avatar: The Last Airbender (2005)

I grew up watching ATLA and my favourite characters have always been Toph, Zuko and Uncle Iroh. In recent years however, I completely fell in love with Aang all anew.

I think especially in the past, I had these prejudices against main characters and found them all the most boring personalities ever. In recent years this changed a lot and especially Aang is a prime example for that. Watching him from the perspective of older me, I find so much wisdom in this young boy. Somehow he represents all I wish to be in my life but at the same time he shows his flaws, he carries this sadness with him that will accompany him all his life. This inner battle and chaos that he has to face day to day and in the end - he is just a young boy. So much has been taken from him and yet he learns how to not let it overtake him, that anger and hurt. He tries his hardest to be better than the day before, even if sometimes the world crashes down on him and he gets overwhelmed. He is a child recruited by adults to manage their mistakes and play into the hands of predestined fate and in this essay I will -

Harry Potter

Harry Potter, J.K. Rowling

I am surprised myself. I thought I would put Fred and George here, or Remus and Sirius, however I realised that none of them quite capture this feeling of lifelong change, of personal, deep impact that Harry had on me.

As with Aang above, I used to think Harry was the most boring protagonist, yet my opinion took a 180° turn in the past years. Many of the things I wrote for Aang apply to him too - the fact that he was a child, that lost so much, and was always faced with challenges that a child should never have needed to face. Something I want to address is how my favourite book, The Order of the Phoenix, lays all of this out. Harry is just as flawed, just as vulnerable and angry as anyone else. I know some people did not like his ‘emo behaviour’ in the fifth book but for me it just showed how human he is, how he was just a teen like myself at that time. As for many, this boy shaped my entire life, shaped a generation, and I will forever be grateful. I’m sad and angry at how J*R behaves, and how she puts us in the position of doubting our love for these stories. I know I will always love them, but I will not turn a blind eye on all the problematic shit is carries with itself and what the author piles upon us.

Lan Wangji & Wei Wuxian

The Untamed (2019)

I will try and keep this short, because if you want to read my thoughts about Wangxian just go to my ao3 and find the over 70k i wrote for them. I decided to put them here together because I can’t seperate them and I can’t choose between them. Each of them carries something I recognise in myself, and each of them is the opposite of me. They each own my heart and soul and I know there will never be a fictional couple like this for me ever again. They’ve snuck their way into my heart and have never left. They deserve to be here, together, because my love for them is indescribable. Bless them. + Bonus:

The Doctor

Doctor Who (1963/2005)

Technically, the Doctor doesn’t count as a “male” character, but since he has been presenting as male up until recently, I needed to include him. I chose the Tenth Doctor because he is the one that broke my heart the most. I adored Nine but he was there too short, and I do love Eleven and Twelve a lot, and Thirteen absolutely owns my heart, Ten has just always been the one that made me cry the most. I loved this era of Doctor Who, I loved how sad and hopeful he was, how heartbroken and yet determined to help wherever it was needed. Doctor Who is always that show, when I return to it, I am reminded that maybe, humanity and the universe isn’t all that bad.

phew, this took ages damn. but i had so much fun! i decided to leave out honorable mentiones because we would be sitting here until tomorrow lol.

#gosh this was nice #a lot of incoherent rambling here #thanks dear #tag game #personal

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antis-delete-your-blogs-pls-thx · 4 years ago

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Mouse’s Reclist (#2/?)

It’s time for a second reclist! Here’s the first, if you want. This is again in no particular order. Title, author, pairing, and fandom will be listed, as well as if it’s a WIP.

The first few are going to be Snarry, because my reading list recently has basically consisted of entirely Snarry. Why? Because I fucking love Snarry. Sue me.

Angels on the Moon by Writcraft - Harry Potter/Snarry - The aftermath of the war is almost as difficult as the war itself, Harry is a mess and Severus is a reluctant survivor forced back to Hogwarts to recuperate from his injuries. When a brick-bonding spell goes awry, Harry and Severus are forced to confront hatred, misunderstandings and a new and unexpected intimacy which takes them both by surprise. Notes: This is the classic-style Eighth Year!Fic, which has long been my favourite trope in the HP fandom. It’s an especially loved trope of mine when it comes to Snarry, too, as I am problematic filth, and teacher-student relationships are my jam. It’s also a classic bonding!fic. But the way it handles the tropes is just… *chef’s kiss*

The Man Underneath by maraudersaffair - Harry Potter/Snarry - Severus is a secret Auror and must always be disguised. When Harry Potter becomes his new partner, Severus struggles hiding his true identity and burning attraction. Notes: This is more bottom!Snape than top!Snape, which I know isn’t to everyone’s taste. However, it’s fucking fantastic, and as someone who has a cathartic and self-fulfilling love of “char A is ugly and has a shittonne of self-hatred and yet manages to score super hot char B” (something that I struggle with myself and still worry how I manage to keep my own gorgeous partner over), this is perfect. Not that I even agree with J.K.’s assessment on Sev’s ugliness. I like the “goth filled with churning angst” look.

a forest, dark and deep by bleedcolor - Harry Potter/Snarry - Once, many years ago (for that is when all great stories begin, many years ago; we never consider we might be in the midst of our own great story) there lived a boy. But wait, you might say, there is nothing special about a boy living, many people do and never amount to much of anything. You would be right, but you would also be wrong, because this story is not about a boy who lived, but The Boy Who Lived, and that is all the difference. Notes: Harry is cursed and must go on an adventure to the Fountain of Youth to find the cure. I cried. I cried a lot. I cried a lot a lot a lot a lot. Happy ending, though! Fairy tale fic. One of the best fics to read if you want magic in the HP universe portrayed more like magic in ancient medieval history tends to be portrayed: mysterious, Eldritch, Occult-like power that requires strange and sometimes dangerous rituals to harness.

you like making me work for it by bottlefamebrewglory - Harry Potter/Snarry - “Before what, Mr. Potter?”//Before Snape had looked at him, drunk and miserable without knowing why, and told him that he could change his future if he wanted. Before he had pulled Snape out of the darkness he’d been determined to drown in. Before the memories. Before he’d looked into Snape’s eyes and watched him die.//Harry didn’t often change his mind, not about people. He’d been accused by Hermione more than once of being stubborn, even prejudiced. And, once upon a time, he’d thought he’d known exactly who Severus Snape was. But that had changed and Harry was no longer that boy anymore, just as Snape could no longer ever be just his hated professor.//“Before,” Harry said again, more finally.//Harry was pretty sure the fact that everyone never thought he’d live past seventeen was at least half the reason becoming an actual adult was so goddamn strange. Severus just wanted to get on with his life now that it was free of controlling old men.//Or, five times Harry flirted with Snape and one time Snape flirted with Harry. Notes: @snapedefender‘s most recent masterpiece. Post-War!fic, one of the best of. Harry worms his way into Severus’ life, as he always does. Also he has a big crush. Their interactions are golden. Everything about this is golden, in fact. It’s just delightful. Read it, please.

How the War Was Won by avioleta - Harry Potter/Snarry - Severus Snape should be dead. Instead, he wakes up after the Battle of Hogwarts to find himself quarantined in a house full of Gryffindors, waiting for Harry bloody Potter to save the world…again. And Severus must be going crazy because he can’t seem to stop thinking about Potter. (Or, where Harry needs a distraction, and Severus doesn’t refuse.) Notes: War Doesn’t End with The Battle of Hogwarts!fic. And it’s by avioleta, a longtime and well-loved Snarry writer. Well-loved for good reason! They know what they’re doing, and it shows. I’ve long loved “Harry and any number of Slytherins are holed up together and must get along” as a trope, and this nails it perfectly. Another fav was in my previous reclist, Hauntingly by ObsidianPen, where Harry is holed up with Draco, Sev, AND Tom! Fun times!

Chasing Ghosts by DictionaryWrites - Harry Potter/Snarry/WIP - “I guess I’m not ready to join the land of the living just yet,” Harry says. “Need a little more time here at Hogwarts, with all the ghosts. You know what I mean?”//In the aftermath of the war, Harry doesn't feel ready to leave the safety of the castle, and to go out into the world at large: he wants to stay. The Room of Requirement - with great reluctance - grants his wish. Notes: Adult!Harry wakes up in the Marauders Era and becomes a teacher, all while he tries to figure out the nature of spacetime. TIME TRAVEL!FIC! That’s in all caps because I love and adore time travel!fic with all my heart. Again, more of a bottom!Snape story. I used to think I preferred top!Snape, but bottom!Snape has come into my heart with a passion as of late and showed me I’m not always going to want Snape to nail Harry into his mattress. This also shows more of Snape’s backstory, with mentor!Lucius and all, which is a fav of mine as well.

OKAY! Enough Snarry, yes, sorry. Moving on!

Love Potion #9 by murderlight - Bleach/GrimmIchi - Gifted with a horrifying box of potion-laced chocolates from Urahara in the hopes he might feed them to somebody, Ichigo thought all the excitement for Valentine’s Day was done with. Then Grimmjow had to get snacky.//A story in which Ichigo is entrusted with the scientifically altered affections of his once-enemy, and might just discover some of his own. Notes: I love the goddamn love potion/love spell trope. This one highlights the dubcon nature of making someone fall in love with you (even on accident) a lot more, but still makes everyone’s feelings feel genuine and real. And of course it ends happily. And there’s no noncon, if that’s not to your taste. Ichigo is a good boy and does not stroke that pussy until that pussy is entirely free from Kisuke’s experimental serums. Yes, I made that pun.

The Edinburgh Problem by snorklepie - Sherlock/Johnlock - “A nice holiday, just a bit more...murdery. ” John said drily.//“Yes! The best kind of holiday!” Sherlock beamed. “So we won’t get bored!”//After he separates from Mary, John returns to Baker Street. Following a request for help from Sherlock's cousin Violet, the detective and his blogger take a trip to Edinburgh. John discovers more about the Holmes family and Sherlock than he bargained for, but tries not to run screaming. Notes: I fell in love with Violet immediately. I am so gay. If you are also attracted to women, you will probably join me in falling in love with Violet. She is amazing, and very Holmes. But a more balanced Holmes. Well, as balanced as a Holmes can be. I love case fic, I love Sherlock Holmes in general because of my adoration for murder mystery (yes, I am a forensics major, thank you for being able to clock me very obviously), and I love deep backstory and family bonding. It’s a long, long ride, but it is undoubtedly worth every single minute.

The Loss of Flesh and Soul by deuxexmycroft - Sherlock/Johnlock/Abandoned WIP - Five years after John Watson puts the murderous Sherlock Holmes behind bars, a vicious copycat killer emerges. A reluctant John is pulled out of retirement to seek the expertise of the only man who can help, a man who has developed an unsettling obsession with John himself.//Crossover with Red Dragon/Silence of the Lambs Notes: It’s Hannigram but Johnlock, what’s not to love? Sherlock’s characterisation in the TV show is already unsettling enough (well, in the beginning, but I like to pretend Sherlock doesn’t exist past S2), so adding in a little Hannibal Lecter is fantastic. Yes, it’s an abandoned WIP. Yes, that hurts like hell. But it’s so, so worth it anyway. Seriously, this is one of the best executions of serial killer!Sherlock I’ve seen in fandom, and given how fucking gigantic the Sherlock fandom is, hopefully you can see how big of a thumbs up that is imho!

Sinking the Land by emungere - Sherlock/Mystrade - Three weeks ago, Mycroft Holmes picked Lestrade up outside New Scotland Yard and made him an offer he'd been unable to refuse, despite his best judgement. Mycroft had sucked his cock, dropped him off at home, and Lestrade hadn't heard a word from him since.//Now, the door of the black car swung open as Lestrade drew level with it. He could just see Mycroft's profile, hawkish nose and shallow chin limned by the orange glow of the streetlight. Notes: Porn WITH plot! That’s the best way to take your porn, imho. One of the best ways I’ve seen the Mystrade relationship developed. It’s just so real. And Lestrade is so head-over-heels, which is my favourite way to take my Lestrade :p.

Clark Kent, of Krypton by TerresDeBrume - DCEU/Superbat - Batman crashes on Krypton a few days before the Turn of the Year celebrations, and Kal-El's life takes a sharp turn to the left, on a path that will, ultimately, lead him to becoming Clark Kent. Notes: Krypton Wasn’t Destroyed!fic is always, always, always my favourite. Sci-fi mystery again, yes. If you saw my first reclist, then you understand that I am always going to fall for a sci-fi mystery fic. This one develops Kryptonian culture beautifully, and equally-as-perfectly encapsulates what “Clark Kent Pretending to Be a Mild-Mannered Reporter, but on Krypton” would actually look like.

Q It Again by writerofprose - Star Trek/QCard - Picard thinks his position, as captain of the Enterprise, plays the largest role in Q's obsession with him. Q would like to take that bet, even if Picard wasn't making one. What say they try it again, from the start? Without the captain nonsense? Notes: A poignant take on Q’s weird fixation with Picard. Not that anyone can blame him. I mean, shit, the man is Jean-luc Picard. Anyone would be fixated on him. Q uses his Q powers to explore Picard in multiple alternate universes, and erases his own memories in order to come in unbiased. Picard gets to keep his original memories, and those of the AU. Does Q still like Picard as much when he’s not at the helm of the Enterprise?

American Outlaws by manic_intent - Red Dead Redemption/Morston - “Bounty’s for one ‘Jim Milton’,” Sadie said, as she got close to the man under the oak tree. “Wanted for murder, robbery, and unnatural acts.”//“Unnatural what?”///“Don’t got details on here.” Sadie passed the folded up poster to her hunting partner. “You all right?”//Arthur Morgan didn’t answer her as he smoothed open the poster. He was aggressively smoking a cigarette, his second, judging from the stub on the grass. Notes: I loved RDR and RDR2 so much that I wrote my own fic in the fandom, despite knowing jackshit about late 1800’s America. It was only a ficlet, in order to hide how little I remember from my contemporary history classes, but much more talented people than me took on the burden of whole-ass novels. Here’s everyone’s fav BNF manic’s take on a fix-it Morston, pre-RDR1 but post-RDR2. It’s excellent. Who doesn’t enjoy forbidden love historical romance? Especially with a delicious helping of age gap. If you’d like Vandermorgan or even Vandermorston, check out more of manic’s stuff, and also kriegersan, who is another long-time fav of mine.

Every Deckerstar fic by wollfgang. But especially a softer beginning, an amnesia!fic, and if you saw all of me, a true form!Lucifer!fic. You know, since angels are described as weird Eldritch beings in ancient texts. Both tropes are my favourite. Also that latter one has monsterfucking and we are all monsterfuckers here.

A Modest Proposal by ignaz - House M.D./Hilson - Tritter's case against House still depends on subpoenaed testimony from Wilson. To save House from losing everything, the doctors of PPTH decide on an unusual solution, which in turn leads to unexpected consequences. This is a story about the sacrifices we make that turn out not to be such great sacrifices after all. (Contains spoilers for everything up to and including "Merry Little Christmas.") Notes: Work 355 on the AO3. It’s that OG. And for an OG slash fandom, too. Well, not Star Trek levels of OG, but it’s a fandom based on Sherlock Holmes, and ACD did come before Star Trek! You’ve probably read it. It’s the OG Hilson Pretend Marriage!fic. But I had to rec it because when I get bored I watch House on Amazon Prime (or the thousands of clips they upload to YT nowadays), and I always am struck by HOW GAY HOUSE AND WILSON ARE OH MY GOD. I can never watch it with Mum in the room, though, because she was in the medical field before she retired, and the unrealistic nature of how House characters behave (and some of the medical procedures) make her SOOOOOO peeved. Though doctors, especially surgeons, were apparently huge egotistical dicks at times. Maybe not kill your own patient levels, though.

In A Place Where No One Appeared by Gefionne - Star Wars/Kylux - Following the destruction of Starkiller Base, General Hux is ordered to remove a wounded Kylo Ren to a place where he can recuperate. Knowing nowhere else to house him safely and discreetly, Hux takes Ren to his family’s estate on Arkanis. He anticipates adding this experience to the already long list of abhorrent memories he has of his childhood home, but six weeks in company with Ren turns out to be something quite unlike Hux expected. Notes: The imagery is so fucking vivid, I love it. The entire world of Arkanis is just lit up so beautifully in Gefionne’s words. This takes a little liberty with Hux’s backstory, given there wasn’t too much out at the time, but it’s so fucking good, I’d prefer its canon to the actual one, lmao.

all that you love will be carried away by coldhope - Star Wars/Kylux - Supreme Leader, the oscillator is failing. The collapse has begun. There is nothing that can be done.//Hux, sent to retrieve Kylo Ren from the dying Starkiller Base, has lost almost everything, and has little patience or tolerance left for anyone or anything--particularly not Snoke's pet pseudo-Sith and his amateur theatrics. But you do the job that is in front of you, to the best of your ability, and you hold on as long as you can. Notes: One of the first Kylux fics, and one of the best. Their relationship is just so real here.

London Calling by SectoBoss - Overwatch/WidowTracer - Recaptured by Overwatch, Widowmaker is sent on a mission to assassinate a high-ranking Talon agent in London. It should be an easy mission – get in, take the shot, and leave. But when Tracer’s your getaway pilot a lot of things can go wrong, and things like 'subtlety' and 'discretion' tend to be the first casualties. Now, lying low after the mission goes awry, the pair of them have to survive in the city until Overwatch can get them home. Notes: Written when OW was in its heyday. And before the fandom was qqqquite as bad as it became. A WidowTracer case!fic, with Amelie as the reluctant good guy, which is always the best trope and I don��t take concrit on this point.

To the Victor, The Spoil by Annakovsky - Hunger Games/Haymitch/Katniss - No berries, no mockingjay, no rebellion. Katniss killed Peeta in the arena, and now she has to live with herself like every other victor. Notes: An old fandom, an older fic, back in the day when nobody complained about fucked up dark!fic. And fucked up dark!fic this is. Rape, age gap, age gap rape, Katniss losing all hope about the future, etc. But damn, it’s good.

The Want of You by MKK - Star Trek/Garashir - Julian Bashir is not quite sure yet about his feelings toward his enigmatic new friend Elim Garak. So when they both show symptoms of a mysterious illness, it seems they'll now have more time apart to ponder the future of the relationship. Their symptoms worsen, however, and to their shock, they discover there's only one way to effectively and inexplicably ease the pain: getting physically closer and closer - and closer. Notes: A forced bonding!fic where Bashir doesn’t actually know Garak all that well. As in, set very early in the canon. Very early. Which is my favourite way to read this beloved trope, because the whole fun of it (imho) is characters who barely have a grasp on each other’s personalities being forced to learn them.

Timeshare by astolat - Harry Potter/Drarry - “It’s not for long,” Hermione said. “By the time we get back to Hogwarts, the Unfettering Brew will be ready.”//“Listen to you!” Ron said. “He’s got to get through a month with the Dursleys and a month at Malfoy Manor. With Draco Malfoy.”//“Yeah, thanks,” Harry said, because he hadn’t just spent the last week contemplating just how much more horrible his summer holidays were about to be than they’d ever been before. Notes: Another forced bonding!fic, this time by AO3’s own founder. I love it. I love it, I love it, I love it. Their interactions here are perfect.

Speaking of Drarry, here’s a Veela!Draco fic I’ve recced before, but I don’t believe was in the original masterpost.

Talk to Me by Saras_Girl - Harry Potter/Drarry - When the usual channels of communication are shut down, the most surprising people can find a way in. A strange little love story. Notes: Harry is temporarily deaf and blind thanks to a misaimed spell. Draco takes care of him, in secret. Identity porn at its best.

Semaphore by DevilDoll - MCU/Stony - "I’m trying to like you, Tony. You’re just making it very hard." Notes: I wanted to rec another OG. One of the first Stony fics in the MCU, and still one of the best. It holds up very, very well and is worth a read if, by some miracle, you haven’t already.

Prisoner’s Dilemma by AvocadoLove - MCU/Stony - After taking the airplane down in the Arctic, Steve wakes to find himself imprisoned as a human test subject. With no idea where in the world he is, his only ally is a fast-talking inventor in the cell next door. Something’s off about Tony that Steve can’t put his finger on, and it’s obvious Tony doesn't fully trust him either. But to escape they may not have a choice… Notes: IDENTITY PORN! And it’s by an author I adore. AvocadoLove has pioneered the MCU MattFoggy fandom, and also donated their efforts and words to Stony. It’s the best. And it’s canon divergence! Which is another favourite trope, and one I can’t ever seem to stop writing myself. I have a lot of appreciation for it.

Speaking of MattFoggy, all of theapplepielifestyle’s works for the pairing are amazing. And all of their works in general.

Belief Space by magicasen - Marvel 616/Stony - The Time Gem appears not when it is wanted, but when it is needed. Steve learns this the hard way.//(Or: an Infinity #6 AU where Thane refuses his birthright and the Avengers are doomed - until the Time Gem shows up within Captain America's grasp.) Notes: A 616!Stony fic, if you’re craving something in the comics rather than the movies. Still with Civil War angst and Stony angry tension, just this time it’s even more painful, because their friendship in the comics!verse was beautiful and their fallout even more devastating.

This time tomorrow (where were we?) by dorcas_gustine - Marvel 616/Stony - Tony goes to see Wanda, and suddenly Steve is alive and there are Skrulls! Or maybe Tony is just going crazy. Nothing happens in this fic, until the very end. Seriously. There's a lot of talking, mostly at inopportune moments, Tony's views on the acceptable gifts to give people are slightly different from everyone else's and he spends more time than would seem necessary being (half-)naked. What else is new? Notes: More 616 for your Stony needs! Tony time travels into a word pre-Secret Invasion and decides to fix things his damn self.

despite the threatening sky and shuddering earth (they remained) by praximeter (Zimario) - MCU/Stucky - “They really didn’t want the mask to come off.” Hill thumbed through the scans, and pulled out a film that she then handed over to Sam, face mostly expressionless but for the flat line of her pursed lips.//Sam accepted the film and held it up to the light, angling so both he and Steve could see it, squinting at the outline of the Winter Soldier’s skull, and the blips of unnatural white that showed up, God, in his brain, not to mention about half his teeth, plus the mask, with its thin protrusions—//“Those are pins,” Steve realized. He looked over at Hill. “The mask—it’s nailed to his face.”//Hill’s face was as unmoved as ever. “Like I said. They really didn’t want it coming off.” Notes: TWS Identity Porn!AU. Gore, given that the Winter Soldier’s mask is literally stuck to his face. But it’s excellent.

Simple by Osidiano - MCU/Stucky - Written for the capkink meme; "To the Winter Soldier, there are basically three kinds of people in the world: superiors, mission support, and targets. He doesn't have the context to understand things like friendship. So what he sees in the Smithsonian exhibit and what little he remembers or feels about his past, he interprets in that light. He thinks that Steve must have been his handler during World War II. That the reason he couldn't kill Steve and the reason he was smiling in the museum photos was because Steve was a good superior who treated him well (or at least didn't hurt him like Pierce and Rumlow, which to him might be the best he can imagine).//Thinking he understands the situation, he decides to report to Steve. Cue misunderstandings, confusion, and heartache for both of them." Notes: Bucky taking a while to snap out of TWS mode is one of my favourite tropes. This fic executes it perfectly.

Bridge Over Troubled Water by soniclipstick (veriscence) - MCU/Stuckony/Phlint - Ultron is destroyed, the Avengers are in disarray, and the Winter Soldier is still in the wind. Steve knows that he has to fix the ever-growing ocean of distrust between Tony and himself, so he takes a leap of faith and tasks Tony with the most important thing: finding Bucky Barnes. But it takes a pair of sexy but stolen hand warmers, several robots, Hawkeye and countless selfies before Steve realises the immensity of what he's set into motion. Notes: I would die for Stuckony as a ship. It’s one of my favourites to read and to write, and this fic here encapsulates it quite frankly in the best way.

Strange New Worlds by Leletha - Supernatural/Destiel/Sabriel - AU…THE FUTURE: Humanity survives everything, spreads to the stars, and finds it needs to know where it can land. Enter interplanetary explorers Sam and Dean Winchester…and sentient starships Gabriel and Castiel. Then ships and crews start disappearing out in the black and, as usual, all goes straight to hell. Notes: I corresponded with Le’letha when they originally wrote this fic, and my love for it has only grown in the years since. Sci-fi mystery, yes. Dude, Castiel is a sentient spaceship. That itself is premise enough.

In His Image by Anonymous - Supernatural/Sabriel - Kali can breathe life back into a corpse, but what exactly is Gabriel now? Gabriel flits around various centuries trying to work that out, Dean has another powered-down angel and a little brother to look out for, Castiel has forgotten how to trust, and someone keeps sending Sam annoying little notes on his laptop. Oh, and Bobby would like to remind you all that there’s an Apocalypse still going on. Covers season 5 from Gabriel’s death to the finale. Notes: My favourite Sabriel fic. God only knows why the author abandoned it. I have their original name, but it doesn’t feel right to reveal it when they made the conscious choice to anonymise. Let me just say that they were a favourite of mine.

If You Were the Last Woman on Earth by Vali - Doctor Who/Thoschei (Twissy) - Just because your best enemy accidentally destroyed planet Earth is no reason to refuse her hospitality. Written for the Only One Bed fanfic challenge. Notes: That last note doesn’t even begin to cover how wonderful this fic is. Tropes are irrelevant, this captures them perfectly. Still one of my fav ever Thoschei fics. Now just get me one where The Master calls our titular hero Theta Cubed Sigma Ex Squared Lungbarrow, please.

A Wealth of Sorrows by evelynwaaaaah - Dragon Age/Solavellan - Things are getting back to normal in Skyhold now that Corypheus is gone. Until the Inquisitor collapses in mid-conversation. Notes: Solavellan is still a ship I would die for. This fic will make you ship it, if the game didn’t already. And this is coming from someone who romanced Cullen on my first playthrough.

Reclamation by copperbadge - Harry Potter/Background Jily and Wolfstar - In an alternate universe, one man still struggles with a moral decision made many years before. Notes: What if Tom Marvolo Riddle wasn’t quite the same maniac of the canon!verse and was accepted to the position of DADA professor? By the esteemed copperbadge.

Truth and Illusion by penny_dreadful - Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica/MadoHomu/KyoSaya - “I’ve, um, been dreaming.” She closes her eyes because it’s easier to ignore Mami and Homura’s stares. “In, in my dream I’m still in bed, but I-I’m not alone, Sayaka’s next to me but she’s not breathing, she’s—”//She’s pale and cold and pretty in the same way the stained glass windows of Kyoko’s father’s church are pretty and she’s lying so still she can’t be anything but dead. But in her dream Kyoko still curls around her, soul gem in hand, keeping her warm, keeping her safe—//“—she’s dead, I didn’t even know her that well and she’s dead and in my dream I’m so, I’m scared that there’s nothing I can do.” She opens her eyes. “But there really is nothing I can do. She’s already gone, and we left her there.” She stares hard at her hands. “We weren’t really even friends.” Notes: Not really a fix-it for MadoHomu, but certainly one for SayaKyo. Homura does more spacetime bullshit. Kyouko remembers.

~~~

I think that should cover it for now! That took me ageeeees, and I have games to go waste my life on and fics to write now lmao. Let me know if you want a third installment!

#fic recs #recs #fic rec #long post

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themosleyreview · 5 years ago

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The Mosley Review: Best Films of 2019

Wohoo! 2019 has come and gone and man did it fly by. This year we had sooooo many fantastic films and this year was probably the hardest list to put together. I really wanted to include alot more, but I had to make a few cuts. Now I tend to keep my list to the traditional 10 films, but on some occasions I've extended it to 11. This is one of those occasions. I have one runner up that is worth mentioning and I think it should not be missed.

Missing Link: Many animated films are computer generated now and the art of hand drawn animation is rarely shown. The one type of animation that is all but extinct is stop motion animation. It takes time, patience and passion to bring to life characters with such sophistication and care in an almost forgotten art form. The masterminds at Laika are truly imaginative artist and this film shows that in every frame. Not many films take the story of the myth behind Sasquatch to fun places without being hokey and I was relieved that this film took it seriously and pumped so much fun and heart into the story and I think this was a hidden gem of 2019. Click the title for my full review.

Now, on to my list of 2019's best films of the year. If you want my full review of each film then go ahead and click the title of each film. First one up is definitely a fantastic sequel to a film that the author hated, but loved the film adaptation of his second book.

Doctor Sleep: The Shining is a classic that can never really be touched. Stephen King is famously known for disliking the film adaptation of his novel, but with his blessing placed upon Mike Flanagan's vision for the sequel novel, we got this magnificent film. Not only does this film pay tribute to Stanley Kubrick's film, but it also follows the same rules and visual structure while keeping the film fresh. The tone was consistent and the performances were across the board amazing. Ewan McGregor, Rebecca Ferguson and the talented Kyliegh Curran deliver absolute greatness. This film features stunning and intriguing dark moments, but definitely has one of the most disturbing scenes I've ever seen and its all because of Jacob Tremblay's performance in THAT scene.

Ready or Not: How many times have we seen the family initiation story in a romantic comedy? A dozen times I tell you! Well how about you take the same concept, throw in a fun horror version of hide and seek with a hint of the supernatural and great dark comedic writing. You get this fantastic film that is all of that and more. Luckily I stayed away from any major trailers for this film because in retrospect, the R rated trailer gave away too many of the fun gags. The performance of each family member was awesome and this was a standout performance for Samara Weaving. Every year from now on, this film will be on my Halloween watchlist. I loved this film and I can't recommend it enough.

Shazam!: Batman (1989), Superman (1978), The Dark Knight Trilogy and Spider-man: Into the Spider-verse are just to name a few of perfect adaptations of a comic book character to screen. This film was beyond perfection in many ways and the best DC film to date. This film had the right amount of fun, darkness and heart that embodies the life of the titular character. I could see the amount of genuine fun the cast was having on screen and the heartfelt performances of Asher Angel and Zachary Levi were outstanding. Jack Dylan Grazer stole the film with his amazing comedic speed and wit. This was truly a film I had high hopes for and it didn't disappoint.

Avengers: Endgame: How do you start a story in 2008 and bring it to an amazing and satisfying conclusion that wraps up 11 years of storytelling? You have a plan, a clear vision from the very beginning and with that it'll special success. Producer Kevin Feige set out on a journey to bring to life some of the best superheroes and keep them together in a cohesive and long formed narrative to complete a saga that's never been done before. He did it with the best talent behind each film's camera and The Russo Brothers have delivered the most epic film the superhero film genre has ever seen. I have waited my entire life to hear Captain America say "Avengers Assemble!" and I'm so happy I've lived long enough for my dream to come true. This was an emotional journey and end to The Infinity Saga. I really can say so much more about this crowning achievement in storytelling, but I'll keep this summary short.

Rocketman: It was only a mater of time before we got a biopic about the incomparable music legend Elton John. I was hoping that it would not shy away from his sexuality, addictions and his bright and explosive since of style. Well this film jumped right in and held nothing back and I loved every bit. It was truly a fantastical film that had enough gravity and style. The musical locations illustrate his most important moments in his life and are visually stunning and accurate recreations of his most iconic performances. Taron Egerton was Elton John and I loved that he sang all the music. This was truly a masterpiece.

1917: World War II films are a dime a dozen, but the World War I films are rare. Sam Mendes is one of the best directors and all of his films take you on a journey through the eyes, mind and soul of a character and he did exactly that in this film. The fact that this film is almost shot completely in one continuous take, gives every moment gravitas and tension as you watch our main character go along and across enemy lines to prevent an ambush. The score was truly haunting by Thomas Newman and my favorite piece from this film was from the flare scene. Such an stunning achievement in filmmaking should not be missed.

Joker: The clown prince of crime has had many iterations over the past 80 years. The most influential and canonical version of the character came from Frank Miller's The Killing Joke. Heath Ledger's take was iconic and made you scared because of his unpredictability. Joaquin Phoenix has taken the character and given a truly disturbing and authentic performance. As Arthur Fleck, we see through a constantly unraveling psyche, a man become a new and real kind of monster. Not only is this version the most unsettling, but it was beautiful. The cinematography was great and I loved how we got into the mind and heart of the character when he wasn't even speaking. This is a definition of how a person being pushed through horrible conditions can truly become a monster and yet be free. I loved this film and I think it will be studied in many acting classes from here on out.

Ford v Ferrari: There needs to be more racing films of this caliber! I love racing films that are not just about the cars, but also the drivers and their stories. This film was based on the true friendship between Carol Shelby and Ken Miles and I can't say enough how much attention to detail and heart that was put into every frame. The sound design in this film was crisp and powerful. The performances by both Matt Damon and Christian Bale was truly amazing and they had the best chemistry. Their fight scene was the funniest and most realistic fight I've ever seen between 2 friends. James Mangold is one of my favorite directors because of his focus on characters and story first before the action. This was a love letter to the world of racing and a respectful look at the lives of these pioneers of ingenuity and racing.

How To Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World: How do you make a perfect trilogy? How do you wrap it up with a satisfying and emotional ending? You focus on the story and stay true to the message and heart you started with in the beginning. You let the character bonds naturally grow and make each adventure a learning experience. This film was a perfect ending to the franchise and I can't stress how much I felt like I was with Hiccup and Toothless on their journey to this conclusion. The performances from the cast were stellar as always and although the villain may not have been as great, he still was a good addition. The visuals were the best and the textures in the scales and sand were out of this world. The score by John Powell truly brought me to tears as I got to say goodbye to my favorite companions. If you ever owned a pet, you known the emotional bond that is forged. This was the ultimate pay off and as a pet owner I saw my dog in Toothless' eyes. I will miss this franchise. If you're not crying by the end of this film then something is wrong with you.

The Peanut Butter Falcon: There are some independent films that take a risk in going outside of the norm and telling a story that nobody would have ever dreamed. This film was truly something special and I can't tell you how happy I was throughout. This film focuses on an individual with down syndrome whose dream is to become a wrestler and it is something truly inspirational and heartwarming. Zack Gottsagen was truly brilliant and awesome in this film. I loved his journey and his will to keep going. Shia Lebouf delivers an equally powerful performance and his chemistry with Zack was very sweet. This is one of the best films of 2019 and the most important films of the decade.

And here we are ladies and gentlemen! This is the moment you've all been reading toward. This film was an automatic choice for me the moment the end credits rolled. The crowing jewel of 2019 is none other than.....

Booksmart: I have seen so many high school teen comedies about partying or loosing your virginity before graduation, but never have I seen a film so engaging and focused on the bond of two bestfriends. Their bond was the heart and soul of the film and you couldn't have asked for a better pair of actresses. Beanie Feldstein and Kaitlyn Dever were beyond perfection in every moment of this film and they had me cracking up left and right. Their adventure over the course of one night was truly fun and you are along for the hilarious ride. Billie Lourd nearly stole the whole film out from under them with her surprising and hilarious appearances. The music choices in the film were awesome as well. The comedy in this film was so fresh and from the first 6 minutes of the film you’re locked into these two ladies chemistry. I can't stress enough how much joy this film brought me and for a film to be on my mind for the entire year and to have me constantly recommending it to everyone I know is an achievement of itself. Olivia Wilde has directed a true masterpiece and new definition of a coming of age story. I can't stop gushing about this film so I'll finish off by saying WATCH THIS FILM!

And that is my list of the best films of 2019 and man has it been a great year in film. Lets hope 2020 starts off the decade with a bang! Thanks for reading everyone.

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bored-fan-bs-thoughts · 5 years ago

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Tyrus Fic: Fake Dating

I know this has been done a thousand times, but I had this written and I didn’t want it to go to waste. T.J. and Cyrus “dating” to convince Cyrus’s Aunt Ruthie that he has a boyfriend. Enjoy!

Cyrus asks Aunt Ruthie if he can bring his friend Buffy to their annual family party, but she’s more interested in whether or not she’s his girlfriend. Cyrus sighs. Sometimes he wishes he could just have a giant sign across him that says ‘I’m gay,’ but he knows social stigmas would make that not very safe for someone with his considerable lack of physical strength.

“Why can’t you get a girlfriend already?” Aunt Ruthie asks.

Cyrus doesn’t know what compels him to respond in the way he does, but he’s just tired of hiding. He doesn’t question if she’ll respond negatively. He just says, “Maybe because I’m gay.” He immediately regrets saying it. His Aunt’s face morphs into a look of confusion…and Cyrus almost thinks there’s a little bit of disgust. Cyrus is mistaken though

“Okay,” she says, “Why don’t you have a boyfriend?”

“I do, actually,” Cyrus lies.

“Oh, really?” she says, cocking an eyebrow. “What’s his name?”

“Uh, T.J.” Cyrus immediately regrets that answer. He knows it’s not smart. He knows T.J.’s not homophobic, but he assumes the guy is uncomfortable with acting gay, especially around Cyrus’s entire family. He’s bracing himself for the next statement he knows is sure to come out of his Aunt’s mouth.

“Are you bringing him to the family picnic next week?”

“I don’t know,” Cyrus says, “I haven’t asked him yet.” Meaning, I haven’t even asked him to be my boyfriend yet and he’s probably straight, like statistically speaking. She doesn’t need to know that part, though.

------------

A couple days later, Cyrus finds himself hanging out with T.J. in his own room. He needs to tell T.J. for him to pretend to be in a relationship with him for a day, but he can’t quite get the words out. His friendship with T.J. has seemed so effortless in the past couple weeks. He doesn’t need his weird request to make everything different between them. He decides that it’s now or never. He’s beginning to realize that this conversation is not really going to arise naturally out of their study hang-out, so he just decides to bring it up out of the blue.

“So I may have told my Aunt that I have a boyfriend,” Cyrus says interrupting T.J. from his math homework.

“Okay?” he responds, “You don’t, right?”

“Correct,” Cyrus responds. T.J. nods his head as if to tell him to go on with his explanation. “I just got annoyed with her constant questioning of when I was going to get a girlfriend and it just slipped out.”

“Well, I don’t really know what to say,” T.J. says.

“The thing is, she thinks his name is T.J. and wants to meet him,” Cyrus says cautiously. T.J. doesn’t know how to respond. “Sorry, you were the first boy that popped into my head!”

“I’m the first boy you think of when you think of a boyfriend?” T.J. says. He has a typical confident grin plastered on his face. Of course he’s using this as an opportunity to boost his own ego.

Cyrus freezes, and a blush makes its way onto his cheeks. He stutters to make a coherent excuse even though the truth is exactly what T.J. is hinting at.

“It was a joke,” T.J. assures him. “So do you need me to pretend to be your boyfriend or something?”

“Yeah. There’s a big family party next weekend. It’s totally cool if you don’t want to—“

“Cyrus, I’ll do it,” he says, cutting Cyrus off. Cyrus just smiles. “Do I just have to hold your hand and give you cheek kisses or something?”

“Oh, yeah,” Cyrus responds, a bit too quickly for his liking. “That’s good.” T.J. nods. “I mean it’s like neutral. I guess.”

“Don’t get too excited,” T.J. mumbles. It’s clearly meant to be a joke, but Cyrus can’t help but notice that T.J. looks genuinely hurt.

“No. I mean, at least I’ll have someone to hang out with,” Cyrus reasons. “We need a story, though. Like how we started dating, how long it’s been, et cetera.”

T.J. pulls an extra sheet of notebook paper out of his spiral and grabs his pencil. “Let’s get to work.”

“You have homework,” Cyrus says, gesturing to the textbook sitting between them.

“This is much better than homework,” T.J. says with a teasing grin.

Great, Cyrus thinks, I’ve opened myself up to a whole new world of teasing.

“What should I wear?” T.J. asks first, breaking him out of his thoughts.

“Well, it’s a picnic, but it’s sort of a fancy picnic,” Cyrus says. “Although, people usually dress pretty casually. No hoodies.”

“Hey,” T.J. says in mock offense, “I thought you liked my all hoodie wardrobe.”

“I do,” Cyrus says, “But it’s not the greatest way to make a good impression on my extended family. They can be somewhat traditional.”

T.J. laughs in understanding.

—————

Cyrus was on FaceTime with Andi and Buffy the entire morning leading up to the party. He knows it’s not real, but he’s afraid his true desires will be revealed tonight. He spent forever picking out the right shirt and styling his hair. His friends yelled at him to calm down many times, but it did nothing to ease his nerves.

When T.J. arrives at his house with flowers, Cyrus knows he’s in a for a wild ride. There is a cheesy, seemingly lovesick look in his eyes as he leans forward to give him a kiss on his cheek.

“Hi, babe,” T.J. whispers to him. It crosses Cyrus’s mind that he really doesn’t have to do that when it’s just them and his parents can’t hear him, but he is not about to complain. Before he can respond, Cyrus hears steps from behind him signaling the arrival of his parents.

“Dad and Sharon,” Cyrus says, “You both know T.J.”

“It’s nice to see you again,” his dad says, extending his hand to shake T.J.’s. “You’re dating my son?”

T.J. nods as he grasps Cyrus’s hand. “Yeah, it’s been about three months.”

His parents nod. Smiles are plastered on their faces, but he can tell there’s something more quizzical. It’s as if they’re assessing whether or not to actually trust the tale they’ve created.

Nevertheless, They both nod and invite T.J. in, explaining that they’ll be leaving in about twenty minutes. T.J. hands Sharon the flowers which certainly seem to win her over a little bit. Cyrus makes a mental note to thank him for that later.

—————

T.J. seems surprisingly at ease with their dating scheme. He is amazing at being polite (when he wants to), and he keeps the PDA to a level that is believable but not overwhelming. Cyrus finds himself just going along with what T.J. does because he’s too nervous to initiate anything himself. Cyrus can’t lie. He very much likes “having a boyfriend,” especially when that boyfriend is T.J.

They are about an hour into socializing when they’re approached by his Aunt Ruthie. Cyrus instinctively grabs onto T.J.’s hand in a slight panic. Aunt Ruthie isn’t scary per se, but she often makes snap judgements about people and she holds onto grudges for far longer than anyone ever should. She looks T.J. up and down with a critical eye.

“Aunt Ruthie, this is my boyfriend, T.J.,” Cyrus says nervously.

T.J. gives his hand a reassuring squeeze before smiling and greeting his Aunt.

“He doesn’t look Jewish,” is the first thing that comes out of her mouth.

Cyrus freezes and attempts to speak, but he stumbles over his words.

“My family’s not really religious,” T.J. explains, “But I would be willing to convert for Cyrus.”

Cyrus’s heart flutters for a second before he reminds himself that this is not real. It’s all for the sake of their scheme. And T.J.’s statement seems to have served its purpose because his Aunt smiles and lets out a small laugh.

The rest of the party is easeful. Cyrus grows more comfortable with the casual touches between them and even begins to initiate his own. Getting the approval of his Aunt was truly an accomplishment, and Cyrus knows the comfortable swag of his best friend is enough to win anyone over when he’s not terrorizing people.

—————

When the party is dying down, T.J. and Cyrus find a quiet spot to get away from the crowd. They sit on a bench in a part of the backyard that isn’t infested with flies. When they sit down, T.J. rests his arm across the bench behind him. Cyrus doesn’t think it’s necessary when there’s no one around, but he is definitely not going to complain.

“You are a fantastic fake boyfriend,” Cyrus says. “You even won over Aunt Ruthie! She doesn’t like anyone.”

“What can I say?” T.J. says with a smug smile. “No one can resist my undeniable charm.”

Cyrus smiles, but he definitely agrees with the boy’s statement. A thick silence passes over them. T.J. shifts in his seat. He removes his hand from behind Cyrus, who tries not to be too disappointed by that, and begins to fumble with his hands.

“Cy,” T.J. says. His voice is soft and unsure. He can’t seem to look up from his hands in his lap. “Today was a really nice day.”

“I thought so, too,” Cyrus says with a smile. His heart flutters from T.J.’s vulnerability. T.J. removes his hand from behind Cyrus and places it in his lap. Cyrus notices a shift in his mood. He seems nervous. Unsettled. Cyrus is about to ask if he’s okay before T.J. speaks.

“Am I crazy to, maybe, want to do it for real?” T.J. whispers. Cyrus’s heart nearly stops. He looks over at T.J. who’s eyes are focused only on his hands. He smiles, frozen with surprise.

“No,” he says, “Because then we’d both be crazy.”

T.J.’s eyes slowly meet Cyrus’s to search for any sign of deception. When he finds sincerity, T.J.’s face breaks into a wide, bashful smile. His eyes full of love and joy.

“Can I kiss you?” T.J. asks.

Cyrus answers with a nod before leaning forward to connect his lips with T.J.’s. It’s a short kiss, but it’s already a hundred times better than the two he shared with Iris. His eyes meet T.J.’s, who looks like his whole life was made. Cyrus finds it intoxicating that he can have this effect on others, especially on T.J. His cheeks heat up and he ducks his head to burrow it into T.J.’s chest. He feels T.J.’s arm wrap around him.

“We have to leave soon,” Cyrus says, his voice muffled by T.J.’s shirt.

“I don’t want this night to end,” T.J. says, tightening his grip on Cyrus.

“Don’t worry, there’ll be plenty more nights like this,” Cyrus promises.

The smile that overtakes T.J.’s face is the most brilliant sight that Cyrus has ever seen, and Cyrus can’t believe he gets to kiss that face now.

#tyrus #Andi Mack #tyrus week

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davidmann95 · 5 years ago

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All-Star Superman #2

A scant year to the day since part 1!

All evidence to the contrary I actually have always wanted to go back to this, especially since I keep getting asked if I’ll do so and it stirs my omnipresent sense of guilt over my lack of productivity, and also the last year has not resulted in a mass turnaround of people realizing it’s a for-real good book and not just comfort food so this remains necessary. This isn’t going to be quite as in-depth as the first go-around - both that as the introductory issue and that as the introductory recap had a lot of groundwork to lay - but still plenty to cover, as this issue sets up Lois and Superman’s arcs for the series, which is rooted (amazingly, especially right off the bat, given the book’s reputation of being about how amazing Superman is) in how badly Superman’s let his fears and shortsightedness poison the most important relationship in his life.

If the first issue is the big classic Superman material - Superman saving the day from the monster! Lois and Clark and the rest of the Daily Planet crew! Lex Luthor’s sinister schemes! A ticking clock to doom! - this scales all the way down to the uncomfortably, stiflingly intimate. Classic archetypal Superman stuff gives way to the most Silver Age issue: casual huge ideas, relationship drama, misunderstandings, last-minute reveals that recontextualize the entire issue, and baaaarely latent psychodrama bubbling up at the edges. In service of that the visual framing here is not unlike a stage play, a limited set of physically connected locales as a pair of figures bounce off one another. Quitely and Grant’s work is therefore comparatively subdued next to issue #1, keeping to traditional panel layouts and wide or medium shots with a background color palate of mostly blacks and whites and grays with a handful of other colors popping out...until Lois starts to lose her shit at the end of the issue and we get close-ups and full black and white panels and eerie glowing and dutch angles and that unsettling abstract image of her clenched teeth, as the story starts to squeeze us like Lois’s gut.

She’s right to be unsettled for that matter; she’s alone on Superman’s turf (the one issue where that’s the case other than #6, and that one’s about how Smallville stopped being his home), the weird antiseptic alien lair of the ultimate super-hobbyist, and all the baggage of their relationship is spilling out into the open as she has less and less reason to think the best of this odd man who’s been lying to her for years. Unlike the Silver Age tales this is referencing, she’s absolutely on the money with her complaints about him: he’s been dicking around with her forever and thinks it can all be okay now (His little “What?” on the second page when she bursts his bubble says it all), and he’s awkwardly overcompensating trying to fix it.

While the Fortress tour serves to peacefully acclimate us to how utterly bizarre Superman’s world really gets past the traditional rescues (the little cubic starfield we don’t know the meaning of yet, trophies are floating rather than physically suspended, the glowing flowers in Lois’s room, “The Phantom Zone map room’s pretty dull unless you can see radio-negative anti-waves”), Superman himself is...humblebragging isn’t the right way of putting it, but it feels like he’s working way, way harder than he ever will again in this book to be cool and impressive and assuring. He’s a dope in love, but he can tell something’s up and that super-brain of his isn’t putting the obvious pieces together, or noticing that this is just putting her off further and further until, like Bluebeard’s wife before her, she stumbles through the threshold of the door she was never meant to, even of course in the end he’s still Superman and there’s a perfectly good reason. Not a good enough reason, however, for her accusations at dinner to not hit home - his mind may be expanding, but he’s still way up his own ass here in a genuinely unpleasant way that’ll be elaborated on momentarily. For now he’s left stammering that she should trust him and it’s limp and phony, especially compared to his big entreaty for someone to trust him in #10 (which’ll be right after he finally comes clean with her); while Superman may not be considered a savior figure by his friends in here the way he often is in the mainline comics Lois seems to be the only one who doesn’t look up to him at least a little bit, but that clarity means she’ll call him out where no one else will.

Across the next two pages it’s all laid out, and we get to the roots of where things have gone wrong between the two of them. Lois is paranoid, certainly, the panels are literally squeezing in on her, but with Superman seeming so out-there and alien like never before she would have every right to be even sans alien chemicals. But notably there remains throughout a part of her assuming the best of him wondering if maybe this is just another big misunderstanding or that he’s simply been mutated by the solar overexposure. And in her heart of hearts, she admits that maybe she wants this to be another big damn trick with a completely sensible justification, because the alternative is that this is the new normal and she has to accept that he’s a flawed mortal man. It’s ugly and it’s mean - especially since she likes Clark - and it’s human as hell in the worst, most understandable way. It’s not going to be until said mortality is staring her in the face that she’ll be able to accept it.

Superman, meanwhile...someone could write a thesis on these panels as an articulation of the Superman/Clark dynamic. The Mirror of Truth is actually preexisting, centerpiece of a Jerry Siegel/Curt Swan joint in Action Comics #269 that was later adapted into the Superman newspaper strip where Lois uses it to figure out Superman is Clark Kent until he tricks her into believing the mirror can lie, after which he tosses it in a volcano; here it’s survived, and curiously shows him as Superman rather than Clark, when in the original tale it displayed Kent even though that was fully the era of Clark as a disguise. In here too it’s Superman who’s the ‘true’ identity of the two and which this time is reflected in the mirror, yet as in #1 it’s Clark who says what he’s truly feeling. In that light, the final panel of the abandoned glasses reads like nothing so much as Superman using the mirror as affirmation that the truth of the solemn, steadfast Superman identity gives him licence to deny the uncomfortable emotions his squishy human farmboy side is dredging up, ‘lying’ to him in a way he had to fake in the source material. Those emotions however knock right on the door of what he can’t grasp here: Clark’s so wrapped up in his own head trying to do the ‘right’ thing that he’s overlooking how his attempts at self-sacrificing selflessness are hurting the people around him. Throughout the series he’ll come to rely on others, first at his lowest points with Jimmy and the Bizarros, until at last he comes to invest true trust in Lois, and the Kandorians, and Leo Quintum, and even Lex.

For now though Lois is deep in a hole, a brief but memorable meeting with the Unknown Superman of 4500AD - everything Superman seems to be becoming to her even before she wonders if it’s literally him, cryptic and masked and with a big ‘ol question mark right on his chest instead of the familiar comforting logo, even his gutbuster of a question reinforcing his distance from a recognizable human experience - leading her all the way to reimagining her Silver Age ideal happy ending of marriage and family with Superman as a Cronenbergian horror. It’s still a Superman story, it turns out he had the very best reason possible for wanting to keep her in the dark, but right through to the end he remains just a little condescending in his reassurance, and his gift of essentially bringing her up to his ‘level’ isn’t going to solve the problem. While the next issue lets us see the two of them properly in love, it won’t be until the elephant in the room comes out that they can come to terms.

Additional notes

* God Quitely is so good. Look at the way the seatbelt curves in the first panel! Lois’s bemused little disbelieving smirk!

* Pages 2-3: Aurora Borealis?!

* Lois is the only character other than Superman who gets to have actual narration (in both cases as looks at their in-text writing), the only one whose viewpoint is thus privileged in the same way as his.

* The key is the realization of this series’ aesthetic in a nutshell: the old-school idea in a sleek, shiny, clever new way that doesn’t take away from the fantastical toyeticness of it all. For that matter, the key is the centerpiece of a later bit with Superman that could be fairly described as the long-term goal of the book book as Morrison’s hoped-for perennial: “One day some future man or woman will open that door, with that key. When they do, I want them to know how it felt to live at the dawn of the age of superheroes.”

* This is A. The first note of a larger DC universe existing offscreen, something that I’ll go into more when discussing #8, B. A brilliant, concise, fun little summation of his place in Superman’s world, and C. Absolutely hilarious given Morrison suggested in his exit interview that this could be seen as much later on in the same universe as All-Star Batman & Robin The Boy Wonder, which entirely rewrites the tone of that moment.

* Already discussed the key but the muscles in Superman’s hand tensing a bit at picking it up is another great detail.

* The glimpse of the Fortress here is excellent: the statues of his friends and enemies instead of pictures because he does things bigger with the yellow electric something crackling at the end of it, the off-model but curious-looking robot appearing to glance at Kandor (are it and the bigger robot with the seats on top of it trophies, or Superman Robots with different designs tasked for specific purposes?), the classic Bad Penny Good For One Crime, the Legion time bubble that establishes his time-traveling credentials for later, the Titanic where he and Lois will dine when their relationship hits a proverbial iceberg, and most strikingly the space shuttle Columbia, his apparent rescue of which I have to imagine is a reference to Astro City’s Superman analogue Samaritan debuting by averting the Challenger disaster.

* It’s next issue that has my actual favorite Superman/Lois moment of all time, but “When we’re married fifteen years, when I’m sagging and he looks just the same, will he still meet me and say things like...” “These are for you. I picked them on Alpha Centauri 4.” is right up there.

* The technological aesthetic of the Fortress is so different than P.R.O.J.E.C.T., sleek and solid and cleanly-lit and antiseptic, beautiful and advanced but a little cold in its own way. As stuffed with wonder as this place may be, there’s something hauntingly empty about it, suiting both the tone of the issue and as a physical embodiment of Superman’s emotional state. The one part that goes against it is the forbidden room, it even has beakers and test tubes to sell the mad scientist vibe...though if you were to stretch it, it much more close resembles the human technology seen at P.R.O.J.E.C.T., and this is meant as a gift for one.

* The cosmic anvil made it along with the key into the CWverse, Lois used it in Elseworlds! I may not be expecting All-Star quality from the upcoming Superman and Lois, but it’s good to know the powers that be are using it as a reference point (beyond how it inspired Supergirl’s take on Cat Grant, a connection I discussed in a post that seems to have vanished into thin air). The whole page is perfect, Superman at his most joyfully benign and beautiful and godlike; it’s the one bit where Lois’s skepticism cracks a touch watching him feed his adorable little Lovecraftian abomination from beyond the stars.

* While he never appears physically aside from a statue Brainiac hovers over this series from beginning to end in name and deed, the ominous ultimate enemy of Superman’s past, the great trial overcome even as the scars forever remain. Morrison mentioned in the exit interview that he didn’t appear in here because he and Quitely already used him as the villain of JLA: Earth 2, but that if he had it would have borrowed Superman: The Animated Series’ take on him as a Kryptonian AI gone rogue. Personally I like his place in here as-is, a little totem parallel to the Justice League references indicating the breadth of Superman’s history between putting on the cape and Luthor’s final scheme.

* A pair of minor notes: Lois points at Superman with the pointy fork when asking him pointed questions, and while it’s not immediately clear on first read she does in fact ask the Unknown Superman exactly 3 questions (“Kal Kent?” “Will Superman and I ever marry and have children?” “What do you mean?”) before he replies with his own, as promised.

* “Oww.” and “Tickles.” literally could not be more perfect Superman moments.

* Worth taking a moment to marvel at just how many future plot elements are seeded here. There’s the obvious bit of Superman thinking about having a partner setting up the next issue, but we also for issue #6 have our first look at Kal Kent and Lois wondering “What if (the Unknown Superman) was really (Superman)?” when Clark will indeed pose as him, for #10 we get our first look at Qwewq, and for #11 not only is the Sun-Eater introduced but so is Robot 7′s malfunction as a result of Luthor’s tampering.

* The structure of the series according to Morrison is a solar cycle, beginning and ending at midday with nightfall in the center. If last issue was the sun at its brightest we begin the descent here, with Superman remaining larger-than-life and ultimately trustworthy but with his classic persona and habits held to an additional, unflattering degree of scrutiny.

#All Star Superman #Superman #Lois Lane #Grant Morrison #Frank Quitely #Jamie Grant #Phil Balsman #Art #Silver Age #Clark Kent #Batman #All Star Batman & Robin the Boy Wonder #Fortress of Solitude #Astro City #DCTV #Brainiac #Opinion #Analysis

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ladyloveandjustice · 5 years ago

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Thoughts on Utena: Blooming Rose of Deepest Black (THE MUSICAL)

Saw the Utena black rose musical and it was great! did a ton of cool things and additions to the arc. Gonna list my favorites.

-They did this really cool thing where when the Black Rose duelists were on stage the person they took the sword from was on stage too and Utena would be fighting both of them (and sometimes they would cross swords with each other too). You’d have both duelists saying things and going into their issues at the same time, so you could see how they mirrored each other. This REALLY paid off at the end when Utena was fighting Mikage, Dios showed up and Mikage was able to see him and was fighting both of them. The theme of duality and parallels between people was just emphasized super well.

-It is WAY more obvious in the musical Shiori has feelings back for Juri (but is expressing them in a truly fucked up way because she thinks she can’t keep Juri’s attention unless she has power over her) than it was in the show. While she and Juri are fighting Utena near the end, they both just kind of have a breakdown and Shiori lets her vulnerability actually show, they pull close to each other and straight up kiss (!!) then they both break away frantically with Juri saying “I don’t believe in miracles” and Shiori saying “I believe in miracles”, honestly I’d have to watch the whole thing again to give a full breakdown, but it was really interesting.

-Shiori’s actress was SO GOOD, she could alternate between sickeningly sweet and truly unhinged, you could just always FEEL she was a second from losing it. Akio did really well at giving me the creeps in every single scene as well.

-Like in the last musical, Saionji’s dorkiness is amped up in a way that makes him pretty fun to watch despite still being hot garbage, my favorite bit was when Utena knocks on the door while he’s living with Wakaba, he just STRAIGHT UP IS TOO INEPT TO FIGURE OUT WHERE TO HIDE in his panic, and poor Wakaba has to frustratedly shove him into a hiding place. Also, he later pretends to be a statue when Juri sees him. Also at one point Miki and Juri just straight up shove him out of the way, such is their disdain, it’s great.

-during said incident where Utena comes to visit Wakaba, Wakaba not only does the “I’M PRAYING! I’M VERY RELIGIOUS!” thing but also pretends she was “practicing transforming like a superhero” and yells “HENSHIN!” Utena offers her Anthy’s casserole which she says “tastes like the inside of a kendo mask” wow how could she NOT want it when you sell it like that Utena.

- the musical also gets more into the fallout of Wakaba’s duel! At the end of it, Utena cradles Wakaba in her arms, sobbing and shouting “WHO WOULD DO THIS? UNFORGIVEABLE!” Afterward, she’s worried Wakaba isn’t coming to school and isn’t answering her when she knocks on her dorm door, and says “I’m sure like the others she doesn’t remember the duel, I wonder if it has something to do with Saionji coming back.” (WOW BABY MADE AN OBVIOUS CONNECTION! I’M SO PROUD OF HER! no i really am)

but then Wakaba comes to visit with her own (better than Anthy’s of course) casserole all cheerful and Utena’s like “oh i didn’t have to worry!” (oh honey why must you always accept everything at face value) and they sing this WHOLE CHEESY SONG about the power of friendship while Anthy just sits there with her empty glassy eyed smile CLEARLY DYING INSIDE but near the end Utena nudges her into participating and she seems to kinda start to enjoy it, because she keeps singing it even while going to sit beside Akio on the couch and he looks SO ANNOYED.

-THEY INCLUDE THE NANAMI COW PLOT BECAUSE HOW COULD THEY NOT. There’s a part where Utena asks Miki why he won’t just tell her and he’s like “well she’s so confident now!” and it’s a genuinely funny asshole moment from him, LIKE LACK OF OUTWARD CONFIDENCE WAS EVER NANAMI’S PROBLEM.

I guess the main nitpick I have about the musical(s) is Nanami’s role IS pretty much completely reduced to comic relief, and the cow thing is her only real plotline in this- I was kinda hoping they’d fold her first duel into the Black Rose arc since it’d be pretty easy to, just have her be Touga’s duelist, but alas (I can see why they didn’t, it’d be a time crunch). Her arc was one of my favorites in the anime, so its a shame. Like yeah, a large part of her screentime were the comic relief episodes, but even those often gave us a look at the underlying insecurities that drove her. Even the cow episode has that sequence where she dreamed that now that she was fully a cow, her brother was sending her to the slaughterhouse. It showed that she was (rightly) terrified her brother would discard her at the slightest provocation, and was well aware of how he was. But even that part wasn’t in the musical.

There WAS a great moment however, when she ascended as student council president and Miki’s like “uhhhh are you a duelist? since when” and she was like “yeah I dueled Utena Tenjou last time” and looked at the audience and is like “JUST BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T SEE IT DOESN’T MEAN IT DIDN’T HAPPEN” so that at least confirms her arc still takes place in the canon of the musical it’s all just offscreen lol. I love that Nanami has the ability to break the fourth wall, she also thanks the stagehand at one point. There’s also an ongoing arc between her and Wakaba of all people, she kind of bullied her in the first musical, but in this one she got jealous of Wakaba during the moment she was “special” and tried competing with her as she sang. Then Wakaba successfully berated her into CARRYING A SETPIECE OFFSTAGE so they could change scenes.

- Anthy remains fantastic, she still has that super-lowkey creepy laugh that she did when Utena asked if the projector was her brother. You could also just REALLY see how uncertain and guilty she was about the whole Mamiya thing, and at the end there’s this part where while Akio is talking to her about her role in all of it, Utena’s running around looking for her, and then Anthy finally runs to her, and Utena says “I’ve got you” while standing behind her and kinda cradling her in that possessive/princely pose and Anthy just has this thousand yard terrified stare that’s full of guilt and conflict and a million other things and it cuts to black and it’s SO UNSETTLING, I got chills.

Anyway yeah, it’s a FANTASTIC show uttely fully of love for the story and good understanding of its themes, and I can’t wait to watch it again, there’s a million little things I missed or can’t remember enough to post about here, so maybe next time I see it I’ll try writing down some more stuff right after.

#revolutionary girl utena #black rose musical #anthy himemiya #utena tenjou #wakaba shinohara #nanami kiryuu #kyouichi saionji #shiori takatsuki #juri arisugawa #miki kaoru #musicals

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indigosandviolets · 5 years ago

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The Conscience of a Young Man

Pairing: Joseph Liebgott x OC x George Luz

Word Count: 2695

Summary: Surprisingly, jumping out of a plane into enemy territory wasn’t the hardest part of D-Day for Andrew Marin. He finds an old friend in the forests of Normandy, though his ability to think on his feet is quickly put to the test.

TW: Gore, period typical homophobia (mentioned)

Part Three of We Happy Few

June 5th, 1944

Andrew had passed nervous, he had passed anxious, hell, he had passed scared. He was downright terrified. Despite taking the two air sickness pills Doc Roe had given him, it made him feel like he was going to throw up even more. Andrew thought about his dream. It scared him even more now that he was up in the air. Well, Andrew thought, at least Sobel isn’t here.

Signing off his life insurance policy is what made everything suddenly real for Andrew. He had never imagined writing out his will at twenty. He left most of his possessions to Albert and his wife, and made them the benefactors for the life insurance, because God, if anyone needed it, it was going to be them. He wasn’t planning on giving a single cent to his parents, either. The only thing he left out of his will was the book he had brought with him to Toccoa. There was way in hell he wasn’t being buried with that book.

After a while, Andrew’s ears grew used to the rumbling engines. He started getting used to it when they were doing their training, but for some reason the flight medicine had only amplified the sound. He wondered how some men had started to doze off. Sure, it was dark as hell, but that sound. That awful sound.

Andrew was almost lurched out of his seat when the bombs started going off around them. He almost wanted to shout but he knew that no one there would appreciate it if he did. The light was still, red. They weren’t at the drop zone and they were already being fired at. Fantastic.

Another explosion and another lurch. Andrew was going to be sick. He could feel it.

He was up before he even realized it. His feet seemed to know what they were doing and his hands were already checking the soldier in front of him - Muck? Yeah, it was Muck. It felt like he hadn’t seen Muck in ages, but he knew that they had talked while they were on the plane. He knew that. He shouted the “Seven Ready!” and like that, they were out. One by one, they moved down the line. Man out, chute deploy, man out, cute deploy.

Though he had felt it almost a thousand times, the yank back the chute and the tumble was surreal. It was almost like it wasn’t happening. The only light was the bombs going off in the distance, the ones going off by the planes, the ones that felt like they were happening all around Andrew.

Then, for a few moments, quiet. The air rushed by just a little bit slower, the dark had just become a little darker, and Andrew was able to breathe. He thought he was dead. All he could hear was Sobel’s “Sick men do not make paratroopers!”

I’m about to be sick and I just jumped out of your damn plane, Andrew thought. Take that, Captain.

Then the ground. It wasn’t a soft landing, but nothing was broken. Or at least it didn’t feel like it. Andrew got his chute off, grabbed his M-1, and looked around for cover. He had no idea where the hell he was, but he knew that he needed to do that.

He got out his map once he was on the other side of a tree. It couldn’t tell him anything he didn’t already know -- he was somewhere in Normandy, he was neck-deep in German territory, and he was lost. “Shit,” he mumbled under his breath. He looked around, trying to find markings. No signs, no roads, not yet at least. He tried to remember where the planes would turn around. They wouldn’t drop them off unless they had to, right?

Andrew looked up from the map, seeing the trees around him. If I’m going anywhere, I’ve gotta get through here.

Andrew walked around the forest, finger on the trigger of his M-1 and his body tense, close to the trees. He walked slowly, steady, sure not to make any noise. Sometimes, when the moments got too quiet or when there was a pause in the explosions, Andrew could’ve sworn he heard the Germans, but then a bird would make a noise and then they’d stop. Maybe it was just in his head. Maybe he was too damn lonely out here.

The quietness of the night wasn’t unwelcome, but damn, was it unsettling. It made him think of being on Currahee, with all the woods around him and being in full jump gear, but he’s not back in Toccoa, he’s somewhere in the middle of France, and he doesn’t have Liebgott to rely on for witty jokes about Sobel. He’s all alone.

That loneliness stopped when a snap came. It wasn’t a bird getting into something. It was a certified, genuine snap of a branch under someone’s foot.

Andrew reached for his clicker and clicked once. He heard the two clicks back.

“Flash?” He heard a voice ask.

“Thunder,” Andrew said, walking towards it.

“For the love -- Marin?” It was Luz. For the love of Christ, it was George Luz.

“Luz,” Andrew replied. “Jesus Christ, you’re not dead.”

“I’d hope not.”

“Who’s plane were you on?”

“Guanere’s. You?”

“I was with Muck. I have no idea where the hell he is.”

“So we’re lost in the middle of Nazi land with no one else?”

“Seems like it.”

“Shit.”

Andrew looked at Luz, and Luz looked right back at Andrew. They were both scared, but neither of them let it show. Luz was still the same person he always was, but now he had that harder front, plus the black camouflage paint. Andrew assumed that he looked about the same to Luz.

That underlying fear couldn’t be ignored -- the fear of death, the fear of being shot out here in the middle of nowhere and then being reported MIA, the fear of never talking to your family again. Though, for those two, there was a much greater fear -- getting caught.

As the two walked together, guns in hand, they moved slowly, whispering about how the jump went and trying to find something that looked similar on the maps.

“How in the name of god was I able to find you first?” Luz asked after a while.

“I don’t know,” Andrew replied. “Probably ‘cause you stepped on a twig.”

“Well, I mean, other than that.”

“If I was a kraut, you’d be dead, you know that, right?”

Luz chuckled before clearing his throat. “Is that any way to talk to a superior officer?” He says with a Sobel-like voice. It’s gotten better since Andrew last heard it.

“You’re improving,” Andrew laughed.

“I know,” Luz replied, shaking off the voice. “Toye didn’t appreciate my hard work as much as you.”

Even though Andrew wasn’t looking at him, he could still see Luz’s smile in his speech. It was hard for you not to hear it. It was just part of Luz.

“Hey Andrew?”

“Yeah?”

“About yesterday.”

“Mm-hmm?”

“I meant what I said.”

“About what?”

“About not wanting to go to that movie,” Luz says. “I really wanted to stay there with you.”

“Luz, we couldn’t have --”

“I know we couldn’t have,” Luz cuts him off. Luz had never cut Andrew off. He was completely serious now. No jokes about it, no impersonations, just Luz at his most serious. “That doesn’t stop me from wanting to.”

Andrew didn’t know what to say. Luz didn’t know the whole story, hell, Luz had barely begun to scratch the surface of Andrew Marin.

“Andrew, what we did, I know it’s not right,” Luz continues. “But damn, there’s got to be somewhere where it’s okay.”

“Ancient Greece?”

Luz chuckled. “No, no, I mean somewhere today.”

“San Francisco?”

“I’ve heard that,” Luz says. “Isn’t that where Liebgott’s from?”

Liebgott. Shit, Andrew thought. “Uh, yeah, I think so. He’s talked about it before.”

“You think he’s..?”

“Like us?” Andrew filled in. I know he is, Andrew thought. Instead, he opted for, “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”

“Andrew?”

“Yeah?”

“You still got that book?”

“Yeah.”

“When we get out of this damn forest, you mind reading to me?”

“Not at all, Luz.”

Andrew was surprised how long it took for him and Luz to run into the krauts. It was two of them, on patrol from what they could tell. The pair were loud, almost shouting. They were joking around, Andrew could tell, and they were laughing.

Andrew and Luz moved behind a bush, waiting for the two to pass. The German’s voices got louder, less joking, as the laughter started to slow. They stopped a few feet away from the bush. They two began to look around, taking their guns in their hand, both with their pistols. Andrew almost wanted to yell at them to get their attention, but he didn’t. Instead, he looked, he aimed, and he fired. The sound had barely registered when he realized what he had done.

A shot in the head on the first one, two in the chest of the other. Andrew pulled his gun away from his face. His arms were shaking and his knees began to quiver. He almost dropped his gun, but he didn’t. He got up from behind the bush, checked to see if there were more of them, walked around, and stood beside the German’s bodies.

The first one he shot was older, at least in his thirties. He shot him square in the middle of his forehead. Andrew wasn’t going to check if the bullet had gone all the way through. The man’s eyes were covered in blood now, not that he would have minded. He was dead.

The second one, though, was younger. Andrew’s age. As he fell, his helmet came off, revealing his dark hair. The blood spilled from his mouth and pooled around his head, probably soaking the back of his hair. Andrew could’ve sworn he saw him breathing, but then it stopped, suddenly, and his eyes went glassy. The kid was dead. He had been alive long enough for the kid to see Andrew, alive long enough for him to know who had killed him, but now he was dead.

Andrew stepped back, and back, and back, until he hit a tree. He slid down the tree until he hit the ground. His knees were pulled up against him until he looked back down at the bodies. Back at those glassy eyes. Then he looked back up, at Luz.

Jesus H. Christ, Luz.

Luz looked at Andrew, walking slowly to the younger man. Younger? Yeah, Andrew was younger than Luz by about six months, he’s pretty sure. Andrew turns twenty-three in a few months and he’s already killed someone.

“Andrew?” Luz asked quietly. That was enough.

“I killed them,” Andrew said, looking back at the bodies. “I fucking killed them.”

“Andrew-”

The blood in the boy’s hair. He felt his throat closing up and starting to burn as he fought to keep talking. “I fucking killed them Luz. They weren’t going to hurt us, fuck, they had no idea where we were or that we even fucking existed, the safety is still on that kids’ gun.”

“Andrew-”

The kid’s helmet is close to a tree. It couldn’t have protected him if the boy even had a chance. “He couldn’t have done shit, Christ, he’s just a kid-”

“Andrew!”

Andrew stopped, took in a shaky breath, and looked back up at Luz.

“They’re Germans, Andrew,” Luz tells him. “You did your job.”

You did your job, Andrew thought. He hadn’t realized he was crying. Fuck, he wasn’t just crying, he was hysterical.

Luz holds out his hand, and Andrew grabs it, pulling himself up and into Luz’s arms. They stay like that for a while, holding each other. Luz was always good at comforting Andrew.

“We’ve got to keep moving, Andrew,” Luz tells him after a while. “The Germans are gonna wonder where their men went.”

“I know,” Andrew said. “It’s my damn fault.”

“No, no,” Luz said, pulling away from Andrew to point at him with one hand, but kept the other on Andrew’s shoulder. “That’s not your fault. You did what you were supposed to do. They would have killed us. You know that. They wouldn’t have shown us any mercy.”

Andrew nodded. Luz moved his hands to cup Andrew’s face, wiping the tears away from Andrew’s face. It was a gentle moment, despite everything going on around them. Andrew placed his hands right where Luz’s elbows bent. It was intimate, Andrew had to admit, but it was fucked. Andrew sniffled, recollecting himself.

“Let’s gut out of here,” Andrew said, and two began to walk off, trying to find where the hell they were supposed to go.

All the while, the boy was still in Andrew’s mind. He saw him breathe, he was sure of it. He walked over just in time to see the kid’s final breath, and watched him die, right in front of him. He saw the blood pool and the eyes go glassy and white.

That wouldn’t be the only death that Andrew would see, he knew that, this was a damn war. This one, though, would be the one that stayed with him throughout the entire war, and probably for the rest of his life.

Once Andrew had calmed down well enough, he and Luz began to talk again. It was light banter, quiet, not Luz trying to be funny, but him trying to lighten the mood.

“Did I tell you what happened with my brother?” Andrew asked, trying to think of something on his end.

“What’s the news with Al?”

“He and his wife finally got over everything,” Andrew tells him. “He’s finally fully forgiven her.”

“How’d he do that?”

“Found out who the father was.”

“Who was the father?”

“Some guy in back-alley who was terminally ill. The guy really wanted to make his last week special,” Andrew explains. “Lorena felt too bad for him to say no, and she figured that one time wouldn’t hurt and that nothing would even come of it.”

“Real special last week.”

“Yeah, no shit,” Andrew said with a smile. “I’m the kid’s godfather and I’m not even related to him.”

Luz laughed a little, but he paused. “Does your brother know?”

Andrew sighed, and nodded. He knew Luz wasn’t talking about Lorena any more. “The first person I told. The only person I told,” Andrew explained. “Only three people really know, and two of ‘em found out.”

“Who’s the other one?”

“What?”

“Who’s the other person who found out?”

Shit on a stick, Andrew thought. Liebgott. And you found out too, and damn, did you like it.

“Old, uh, girlfriend,” Andrew replied. Liar. “She kissed me, and, uh, it didn’t feel right. She tried again, and it just felt worse. She didn’t like me too much after that.”

“How do you know?”

“‘Cause she married my brother.”

Luz laughed. That part wasn’t fake -- Lorena was interested in Andrew, for a good while too. She just happened to find out about another thing that made her decide she liked Albert better. Same thing that Andrew had already lied to Luz about.

The silence after that was a welcome one, and Andrew could’ve sworn that he and Luz weren’t walking that close together before, but he didn’t think much of it. It was a more than welcome gesture, and it just got that final level of comfort back to Andrew again.

It didn’t keep his mind off of how he kissed both Luz and Liebgott. It didn’t keep his mind off of how he betrayed both of them. It didn’t keep his mind out of how he was actively lying to both of them. There was no good way out of this situation -- they were all in the same company for Christ’s sake. There would be a time when the three of them would be together and they’d find out, and Andrew would lose the two men he cared most about in the entire world.

If this war didn’t kill him first.

tag list: @alienoresimagines @fromcrossroadstoking

if you want to be added, let me know!

#we happy few #joseph liebgott x oc #george luz x oc #joseph liebgott #george luz #oc fic #andrew marin #band of brothers fandom #band of brothers fanfic #band of brothers fanfiction #my writing #tw gore

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thegospelofnagisa · 5 years ago

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Magia Record: Outsider Critique and Formula

I had a problem with the episode too and glad you pick up on a formula. Tbh it’s because nothing was accomplished for the sake of baiting a cliffhanger ending. And I’m talking as someone who has NEVER PLAYED THE GAME so I hope fresh eyes are insight. (So please forgive me if I misspell anyone’s name or miss something)

I’m seeing the formula is “pan out the episode as much as possible with exposition and filler, having the characters get nothing done, so that we can create a big cliffhanger shock twist to end the episode on.” Because episode 2 felt the same way (I felt wow the episode has 4 minutes left already nothing happened????)

Yeah Iroha meets Tsurono, but who is Tsuruno? She owns a Chinese Restaurant but all we know about her is that she’s loud and eccentric, even Yachiyo (who CONVENIENTLY shows up like Homura would maybe I’m missing something there) makes a comment that’s why she’s not friends with her yet they don’t even bother showing their history or anything, we just see her being eccentric. I don’t mean to offend anyone that’s a fan of Tsurono, but from an outsider perspective there was nothing interesting about her and they don’t develop her, she felt like a random quirky anime trope that was tagging along even the episode was focusing on Iroha and Yachiyo, like what was even her wish? Come to think of it they never get in to the girls wishes only Kaeda which is strange, that’s a huge part of the series not every girl has to have a secret wish. I’d assume Tsuruno just wished for her and her family to run a Chinese restaurant or bring foot traffic to her family’s restaurant and the side effect is that it’s not the best food. (Now if she said it and I missed it I’M SORRY)

In Madoka when characters came along they felt genuine to the point you wanted to know about their stories. It felt like a show about real girls making wishes with dire consequences while being on an adventure, Things happened, things changed, we warm up to the characters organically, and we’re moving in every single episode. The anime was so seamless in that regard that it was easy to compose it in to two separate movies. Here I don’t even know what’s going on, it’s usually just static, I only want to see what happens to Iroha and Ui, as I actually really like her and the set up to her story. She’s a refreshing magical girl protagonist in my opinion and feels like a real person

It’s bothersome too because we just spent 3 episodes getting invested Momoko’s group, then suddenly they vanish, which it’s obvious they’re trying to group in the entire game cast in 13 episodes, which is why the show should have at least had 20. I’d like to get to know these girls before introducing 5 more. I feel like they’re taking the Sailor Moon Crystal route, inserting characters without expanding on them expecting the audience to know who they are since a pre-existing material is around. Even the scene with that blonde girl I didn’t understand why she was yelling at Iroha when nothing was shown, and I’m reading seeing she likes everyone to see her as beautiful or something. You’d only know that if you played the long RPG game.

I’d say the worst part of the episode? The grocery store scene. It was jarring. I’m going to quote Nostalgia Critic here and call it a big lipped alligator moment. Even though the build up to it was fantastic, they built the whole thing up like that was related to the episode’s plot. It’s never mentioned again. Yachiyo is all surprised we hear chanting as she’s trying to tell Iroha code, as if that’s where the rumor really is. Nope it was just a random witch battle. All it did was conveniently fast forward the day to night because of the time they spent there and Iroha having taint, which can be argued that could have happened in any scene in any way that wouldn’t have paused the episode’s plot. They could have literally just made day in to night, have her look at the moon or dusk making her realize. They could have put the witch battle at the start, Beginning with Tsuroni (maybe running in to her since it’s established they aren’t friends) and Yachiyo shopping at the store in that macabre sale setting hinting at Tsuroni that its a witch barrier like she did with Iroha. It would make sense too since Tsuroni runs a restaurant and would be shopping for groceries. have Tsurono (meet) and Yachiyo in the store, finding the witch where Iroha in trouble there (trying to find her sister in Kamihama of course), then follow with Iroha being tainted from feeling useless in battle, and follow with the restaurant scene nursing Iroha back to health, where the rumor could be put in to play. Erase the meeting at the adjustment center where she just gets a flier of the restaurant, and pointlessly placed battle, but that would mean finishing the plot in one episode instead of a cliffhanger.

Tl;dr I feel like they’re stretching the episodes with needless padding to bait cliffhangers to get people to watch the show (even teasing Mami and her not showing up at all is pretty low brow, the actual ep didn’t have a cliffhanger so they just threw that in last minute) and being cornered by having to adapt 8+ magical girls in to an anime. really hope by the end of its airing I’m wrong, and that it’s a masterpiece, because I love the art direction to pieces and Iroha. Even the music is pretty even though Ms. Kajiura is gone. Again I’m sorry if I miss anything because I never played Magia Record (no matter how much I tried I couldn’t get in to it, sorry) but a die hard Madoka fan. And no, I’m not begging for characters to die like a lot of fans are doing, I just want a memorable enjoyable story.

I do respect that the show isn’t throwing obvious fan service which turned me off from the game, I was expecting so much worse, and that there are interesting girls and lore. I love the idea of a magical girl counseling/adjustment center and powerful beings that are pointless to fight but are needed to fight to save people. Even the little Kyubey is unnerving and creepy when it’s revealed Kyubey can’t enter Kamihama. And again the imagery is so spot on from the witches, to transformations, and symbolism (the pictures of Iroha that imply Ui was with her and the half room gives me chills, hell the ending theme with Yachiyo in the elevator is so unsettling). I am enjoying the journey so far and will watch till the end, and really hope my critique is wrong by the end of the airing. Thank you.

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This is an interesting thing I recomend people to read because, it does shine some light on an aspect of MagiReco that should be adressed and it is that the anime DOES sin a little of being a bit too reliant on you having a previous knowledge from the game, I absolutely agree with that.

Not to the level of Kantai Collection which is flat out imposible to follow if you have not played the game and you won’t be able to understand why some characters dying or doing stuff matters so much, but MagiaRecord does rely on that, I mean they freaking spoiled people BIG with the endcard of episode 4 for fuck sake, it’s EVIDENT there is a mindset in there to not take new fans perspective into account, I am hoping they will find a way to make it all work fine as the series goes on (It can happen).

#magia record #tamaki iroha #nanami yachiyo #submission #magireco anime

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