#it's MY phone btw i'm not renting it

[flamagenitus]

Does anyone else remember the android default voice notes app? I remember it. I used it to record myself shitty songs when I should have been studying. I was about to use it to record then listen to an interior monologue, primarily to seeing I sound insane. Except my phone no longer has a voice memo app, so I feel even more insane without any release and/or bulistening to myself from an outside perspective for. Perspective

My phone's 'Default Apps' folder only has 4 apps in it now. I was sure it had more when I made it, 3 years ago

[wernerherzogs]

You don't pay bills on mobile?? But that's too much effort using your laptop just to pay bills (just curious kasia, i rarely use my laptop these days 🙈)

i literally use my laptop once-twice a month only, exclusively to pay bills 😭 it's the only thing keeping the laptop alive 😭

[xxxanteaterxxx]

Roommates AU

roommate!remuslupin x fem!reader

CW: swearing, thats about it really.

lemme know what you thinkkkkk part 2

this is totally inspired by @moonstruckme btw

"So, do you have anything specific that you're looking for mate?" James asked, staring down out his laptop. Remus sighed; he had been looking for an apartment for weeks, but nothing had turned up in the area he was interested in.

"Honestly, anywhere would work at this point." Remus was looking at his own laptop, scrolling through all of the postings he could find. Nothing was available through, and Remus was about to be homeless.

He couldn't afford to keep living in his current flat, not since his roommate had decided to move back home. Remus had been stressing over this for months now, ever since his roommate had told him the news.

"How do you feel about a roommate bud?" Sirius asked suddenly, sitting up from where he had been laying down and scrolling on his phone. He stretched his arm out towards Remus, waving his phone around.

Remus snatched it and took a look at the posting Sirius was looking at.

"Two bedroom and one bath apartment. Looking for a roommate ASAP. Rent is $500 a month (utilities included). Message me for more information. :)"

There were pictures underneath the post. Remus clicked on the first one. It looked nice enough to him. He forwarded the post to himself before he messaged about it.

"I'm gonna send a message, see if I can schedule a walk through." Remus sighed as he tossed the phone back to Sirius, who seemed highly impressed at his find. He picked up his own phone and found the post.

He clicked the message icon at the bottom of the post.

`Hey, I saw your post about looking for a roommate. Is the room still available? Could I maybe come by for a tour soon? `

He sent the message before setting his phone to the side and continuing the search. Not expecting to receive a response for a while.

Not even two minutes later his phone buzzed. He grabbed it and sat up when he saw the response.

`Would today work? Maybe around 12? `

Remus was quick to respond.

`Yes, 12 works great!`

Then he followed it up with another.

`Can I bring some friends?`

The reply came just as fast.

'Yes, I'll see you then!'

Remus stood up, a large smile growing on his face. To say he was relieved was the understatement of the year. He looked at his friends.

"I've got a tour scheduled at 12 today, you guys wanna come?" He questioned. He really hoped they would, what if you were a serial killer and the post was only a ploy to draw unsuspecting victims in.

"Course mate! Its 10 now, what if we head out and find some food around that area?" James asked, causing Sirius to jump up quickly.

"Let me grab my shoes!" He called as he raced down the hall to his room. Remus shook his head and gathered his belongings.

It was right around 12 when there was a knock at your apartment door. Abandoning the cookies you were making, you raced over to the door. You had almost made it too, but the fuzzy socks adorning your feet caused you to fall.

You groaned as you pushed yourself up and yanked the door open with a large smile on your face. It dropped slightly when you realized that it was men on the other side.

"Hi! I'm Remus, we're uh here for the apartment tour?" There were three guys standing outside. The tallest of them was the one who had spoken. You nodded and opened the door wider for them to enter.

"I'm Y/N! I'm sorry about the mess..." You gestured around the living room. "It's my day off and I've been bingeing some shows." You kept a smile on your face as one of the other boys chuckled.

"So, let's get on with the tour!" You clapped your hands together. "I'll show you around and then let you guys look around by yourselves, yeah?" Receiving nods, you turned around and began the speech you had practiced in the mirror when you and received the message.

"Obviously this is the living room..." You mumbled and then walked towards the kitchen. Before entering you turned around. "Warning, I'm making cookies right now, so the kitchen is a bit of a mess."

You entered and they filed in after you, looking around and nodding to themselves. "Cookies anyone?" You asked as you grabbed the plate of the ones that were ready. They each reached out and grabbed one.

"These are amazing." You heard someone moan.

Moving on you began to lead them upstairs. "Right there is the bathroom and right here is my room and right here is the other room!" You said walking quickly down the hall and pointing things out as you did so. You turned around to face the three. "Any questions?"

No one answered and so you nodded. "Smashing, have a look around. I'll be in the kitchen if you need me!" And with that, you were darting back downstairs just as the alarm for your second round of cookies beeped.

Sirius was staring after you like you were the love of his life. His mouth hung open and his eyes were wide. James cleared his throat while looking at his best friend and roommate in amusement. Sirius shook his head and turned to look at Remus.

"Well, if you don't want to live here, I sure fucking do." He said before he walked past Remus and into the room you had said was the available one.

It was a nice sized bedroom with a window and a very large closet. Remus was quite impressed with it actually and you seemed nice enough.

He could definitely see himself living here, even if it was with a total stranger. He walked back out into the hall, heading for the bathroom to have a look in there.

You seemed pretty neat; all of your stuff was kept on a shelf and in a couple of drawers. Remus noticed how big the bathtub was, and he sighed at the thought of a nice bath.

As he walked further down the hall, he realized that your door was open, and he had to fight the urge to take a look around. He turned to walk back to the room that would be his so that he could ask James what he thought but his two friends were gone.

He listened for a second as he heard talking coming from downstairs. He turned and made his way towards the stairs. As he made it down and saw that no one was in the living room, he headed for the kitchen next. There he saw James and Sirius sat at the table while you danced around the kitchen cleaning things up.

"These are delicious, by the way." James spoke after chewing what looked to be one of the cookies you had made. You turned from the sink to grin at him. When you saw Remus, you smiled and wiped your hands on the towel thrown over your shoulder.

"So, what did you think?" You smiled at him this time, your question had alerted the other two to his presence. Sirius answered before Remus himself could.

"Well, if he doesn't want it, I fucking do!" He spoke loudly causing James to look at him.

"And what about our fucking apartment?" James asked incredulously, looking at his friend as if he had just stabbed him. You paid them no mind as you looked at Remus for an answer.

"I'll take it. When's the soonest I can move in?" Your shoulders sagging in relief at his answer.

"Oh, thank fuck, no one else has responded and the last chap I had look around gave me the Heeby jeebies." You paused, blowing a strand of hair from your face as you thought about it. "How about as soon as bloody possible eh? That work for you?"

Remus nodded and a brilliant smile formed on your face.

"Great, let me fetch the lease agreement."

[little-annie]

NSFW STEDDIE & STOBIN TEXT CHAIN

Steve normal text. Robin’s Bold. Eddie's Italicized Bold

---

___Bird Brain___

Rob

Bobby

Bobin

What? Im literally right next to you

And were at work Dingus get off of your phone.

No.

I'm. Uh.

?

You know the shop across the street???

?

The mecanic

Mecanic

Fuck

Mechanic

Okay.

They have a new guy

Okay.

And?

Gay.

Literally, what?

I think I'm gay.

Steve

Cuz like he's just so pretty

Steven

And that Haut

Stephanie

Hair

Hey whore

Wut

Bathroom talk. Now.

Were working.

You and I both know no one rents movies on a Tuesday at 10am

Bathroom.

Now.

To the porcelain thrown

You know sometimes I forget youre an idiot 20 something

then you go and say shit like that

…

Bitch.

Whore.

---

How do I tell if a mans gay or whatever its is that I am,

,

Fuck

?

Bi schedule

Bi sexual

Ducking auto correct

Babe. I hate to break it to you but your auto correct is as dyslexic as you are. You basically train it

I-

Huh.

Well ghen.

Anywho.

Gay.

Whats he wear? Any piercings? Tattoos? Whats his hair like?

Oh! This is important. DOES. HE. HAVE. A. HANKY. IN. A. BACK. POCKET???

black overalls and a black shirt. Lots. I think. His ears literally look shiny from across the street. Lots of tattoos too.

And yes??? What's that have to do with anything? My papa had a hanky and I'm pretty she he wasn't gay

He probably was. Being Bisexual is genetic.

Actually?

No Dingus.

But like the man was in the navy? Right?

Ya

Gay.

Stfu

ANYWAY

HANKY.

YES.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

FUCK YEAH.

WHATS IT LOOK LIKE AND WHAT POCKET?

???

it's black

Oh hes kinky

What side pocket

It switches.

I bet it does

Gay.

That is a gay man Steven.

Go get your dick sucked or your booty bumped or whatever it is the kids are doing these days.

Eating ass

EXCUSE

yeah. It's a thing.

:0

Robin you literally munch so much carpet. whats the difference if its the rug at the back door.

Never.

Ever.

Say.

That.

Again.

Bubble bath privileges revoked.

You whore.

---

The bath is sad with no bubbles Bob.

Make your own.

…

Okay. Ew. Stop. Stink ass. I can hear you. And the neighbors probably can too.

Are you sorry?

Not really.

Well pretend to be.

Kay.

IM SO SORRY

…

:’(

better

Your bubble bath is under the sink

:D

---

Eddie

Wut.

Thats your new lovers name.

WUT

ROBIN.

WHAT DID YOU DO.

---

*1 new message* Hi -the weirdo with long hair who works across the street (Eddie)

---

I hate you

BTW babe you have a date on Tuesday

ROBIN IT IS TUESDAY

oh ya.

Well you have a date today gay boy

…

I need to leave

The fuck you do

Yeah. I fucking do.

I need to shower

And shave

And

I dont know

What do you do before a gay date

Prep?

For what?

Oh honey

---

Should this hurt?

8⁰

Don't tell me

Are u?

Yes.

Shut up.

…

Does it hurt

Like.

Kinda?

Lube. Oh my god. LUBE. Steve I swear to Dolly, if youre prepping your fucking asshole right now, IN THE FUCKING WORK BATHROOM

I

WILL

END

YOU

:*

Youre a whore. Oh my god.

STEVEN I CAN HEAR YOU.

STOP.

This is nice.

Why havent I done this before.

Where's the protest

Prostate

Rob?

Brain me. Educate me please.

…

Nvm

Oh fuck

Found it

Definitely found it

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

like good for you babe. I love you and support you but OH MY GOD YOU WHORE GET YOUR FINGERS OUT OF YOUR ASS WERE AT WORK.

…

You really think Id do that

Obviously

Im fucking with you

Im just googling shit and well taking a shit.

Fuck you

Love you

---

*2 New messages.* um. So. Im Eddie. Your coworker. Robin? Gave me your number and said we're going out tonight???

---

Dingus have you answered your husband yet

FUCK. NO. WHAT DO I SAY.

well you could send him a picture of your ass

Or your tits

Or your weeeen

Or all of the above

Like a package deal

Hehe. Package.

Robin.

Ugh. Wut.

Be serious.

Fiiiiine. Introduce yourself. Tell him youre excited for tonight. Make a plan for your date. (Other than the reservation I booked you at Enzos) and then tell him you thi know hes pretty and you want to have his babys.

He is pretty.

And like. Id definitely let him try to get me pregnant

ANSWER HIM.

FINE.

---

___Future Husband___

um. Hi. First of all I'm so sorry for my friend. She likes to get her nose into my business. Second.

…

Ithinkyourereallyprettyandimexcitedfortonight.

At the risk of being too forward. I like literally saw you my first day at the shop and have wanted to talk to you since. Cuz. Yeah. Pretty doesnt even begin to explain what you are. Like. Bro. Have my babies.

FUCK

I CANT BELIEVE I SAID THAT

disregard the baby thing

I dont know about getting pregnant. But Im up for practice.

Like.

If you are???

8⁰

… like

Now?

My breaks in 20

Fuck

Really?

Meet me at the van across the street

:*

---

___Bird Brain___

STEVE

STEVEN

YOU WHORE

ARE YOU GETTING YOUR BACKDOOR RUG MUNCHED ???

OMG

YOU ARE

THE VAN ACROSS THE STREET IS SHAKING

AND ID BET YOUR LEFT NUT THAT YOURE IN IT

…

GET IT I GUESS BABE

DONT GET PREGNANT

OR DO

YOU DO YOU BOO

…

youre on your own for the rest of the day Birdie

And where the fuck do you think youre going

Eddies

…

Boo you whore

But like. Get it babe.

But I also hate you.

I dont want to work in this shithole alone

Steven

Answer me

Hi Robin

This is Eddie

On Steves phone

Steve's a little… preoccupied

OH MY GOD

WHAT HAVE I DONE

YOU TWO ARE GOING TO BE DISGUSTING

BUT BRO. ILL END YOU IF YOU BREAK HIS HEART

STRAIGHT UP DIG YOU A GRAVE IN THE DITCH AND BURN OFF YOUR FINGERPRINTS AND BREAK YOUR TEETH SO NO ONE CAN IDENTIFY YOUR BODY.

COLD CASE BRO

what would you do about my tattoos

Fuck you

Sorry. Positions taken.

Id burn your whole body. No skin = no tattoos

I like the way you think

But in all seriousness

Mmmm imma gonna marry this boy

Hopefully before the end of the week

Fuck yeah

I call best man

[webslingingslasher]

can you please give us something angsty between ethan and trouble? like how ethan texts her and she ignores the messages during the breakup. or when they run into each other in the cafeteria and trouble pretends he’s not there and walks away despite he’s calling out her name. the way trouble no longer crochets because that was her thing with ethan and it feels strange to pick up the needles and it makes her miss him.

*cleaning out my drafts!*

ethan is peter's best friend and by default, he owes you nothing.

you were a friend for the moment but once you and peter ended, so did the alliship. ethan didn't get that in the memo, but he's never made a friend through peter and lost her through him too. he keeps thinking everything is normal, like there isn't a giant peter shaped hole in the fence.

'hey, so i was thinking we could have a little study sesh at the library?'

'i'll rent out a room. and it would be just us.'

'obv.'

you miss him too sometimes. but he chose peter by default and you don't condemn him one bit for it, ally did the same with you. peter was ethan's friend first, so he should still be one when you walked away.

peter doesn't talk to ally anymore either. both friends became constant reminders of what you had and lost.

it might be a text message but you can hear ethan's voice in your head, he sounds defeated.

'i'm guessing that's a no.' you never open them but he knows you read them. it doesn't surprise ethan, you've ignored him since you dumped peter. he just never expected to be dumped too.

'i miss you.'

'i just wanna hang out with you again.'

'and if you don't want him around either that's fine with me.'

'i'll fly you somewhere in my private jet.'

'damn it. i was really hoping for a "you have a private jet???" response.'

'it's a yes btw. just because i know you're curious.'

'well, actually, it's my parents but you always say that's the same thing.'

you watch each notification appear and disappear. your teeth dig into your bottom lip to stop a smile, you can't go backwards. if you're around ethan it leads to peter and you can't do that.

ethan didn't realize there might be a reason why you haven't been texting him back, but he does now. what if you weren't replying because you weren't seeing them? he thought you were just ignoring him but it's been weeks of silence.

'did you block me too?'

he hopes not. he really, really hopes not. ethan knows why you pushed him away, he's just upset that he didn't get a say in it. ethan's never been able to tell you how sorry he is on behalf of his best friend and how he doesn't want to lose you over his idiocy.

you frown at the message, restraining your impulse to text him back, you hold your breath and wait for another message.

it comes two minutes later and your entire heart shatters.

'crochet buddy?'

you haven't been able to look at your basket of hooks and yarn, it feels wrong to finish your pig. you told ethan you kept messing up on the ears and he said he'd do them for you. he never got the chance. you wonder if he finished his lizard tail.

your thumbs move before your mind can stop you, not that it would. you had to tell him the truth, you can't have him wallow and sulk over you.

peter might deserve it but ethan doesn't.

'it would surprise me if you didn't have a private jet.'

'hey!!!!!!!!'

'don't leave yet pls.'

'let me take you out to lunch. we can go to the village or brooklyn.'

'i promise he won't find out.'

'please?'

'i miss my buddy.'

you think it's almost as painful as splitting from peter. ethan is peter's best friend and you can't get in the middle of that. it'll hurt peter just as bad and while part of you wants him to be hurt over you, you don't want to use ethan as the pawn to do it.

you back out of the conversation, lock your phone, set it down, and grab your unfinished pig before curling up with him for a nap.

---

ethan doesn't eat in kayte hall. you know he doesn't eat in kayte hall because you ate in cathedral hall with the sig nu frat.

used to.

you switched to kayte hall two weeks ago, it was an extra five minute walk but it was done with the purpose to avoid situations like this.

you try to move discreetly, it doesn't matter, he clocked you the second you sat down. you can't abandon ship, he's sliding in the seat across from you.

'you're avoiding me and i really hate it. you made me stoop so low i had to get a pledge to track you down for me.'

you're not going to give him the silent treatment, that would be plain rude.

'are you admitting to stalking me?'

'i'm admitting that i instructed someone to stalk you. are you flattered? you should be.'

'why aren't you at cathedral?'

'because you don't eat there anymore, duh. can i have a grape?' you hesitate before sliding your tray halfway up the table, he takes three.

you listen to the purple crush between his teeth, ethan looks a bit more serious after he swallows. you look at your cup, his stare makes you feel guilty.

'look, let me get this out of the way now so we don't have to talk about it again. i don't know all the details, park- peter hasn't really opened up to me about it.'

you swallow tightly, this is exactly what you didn't want to happen.

'from what i know- or pieced together, he disappointed me too. i'm sorry for whatever he did and i'm sorry it hurt you enough that i was caught in the crossfire, but between us, when i'm with you, he doesn't exist. this is the last time i'll ever talk about him, i'll offer you the same courtesy and we won't bring it up again.'

ethan's saying all the right things, you softly shrug. 'what's the courtesy?'

'you can ask me about him if you want to. it'll stay between us, i promise.'

the peter floodgates burst open, you'd done your best to push him from your mind but now you have the opportunity to indulge. you nibble at your bottom lip before looking up at him. ethan's smile is gentle, he's trying so hard for you.

'how is he doing?' from the little rumors you've heard it doesn't seem too good and the harsh bruise splattered across his jawline last week didn't do him any favors.

'um,' his smile tweaked, it's worse than you thought. you know it's bad because ethan's trying to find a way to be honest but not worry you. 'he's okay.'

'please be honest.' you know you ended it, you know it's real this time and you know part of you wants to hate him but if he's really down bad, you might have to give him a visit. ethan takes a deep breath and leans in closer to the table.

'yeah, he um, he kind of tanked. he's not himself right now. he's skipping chapter meetings, he's missing classes and if he's home, he's barricaded in his room or drinking.' your heart sinks, you're not hungry anymore.

'does he miss me?' you almost feel embarrassed to ask. ethan doesn't find the question pitiful, he's just glad you're talking to him. 'bad.'

it's brutal on your end too, but he sounds worse than you. at least you can get through the emotions of your day to day. you wish you could say you won the breakup but there's no winning.

'has he...'

you don't want to know the answer. you don't want to know the answer. you don't want to know the answer.

you still ask it. 'has he hooked up with anyone else?'

'no.' you believe him because he said it quick and with certainty. you nod slowly, it was the answer you wanted but it still didn't feel good.

'is he still going to the parties?' ethan shakes his head, 'i haven't seen him at any.'

'but he still has you, right?' if you didn't have a small support system you would've lost it ten times over by now. peter doesn't have a whole lot but one ethan overpowers ten mediocre friends.

'i asked if he wanted to talk about it, he said not really, i told him i was there for him and he said thanks. there really hasn't been much else, he's just been really quiet.'

ethan is all peter has, you can't rip that away from him. it would be evil to pollute the one thing he still had, you walked away from him and you shouldn't take his friend with you. plus... how could you move on if you have the peter encyclopedia at your fingertips?

'at least he's not crying.' you end it with a half laugh, half hum. it's sad all around and you're trying to lighten the mood, ethan avoids eye contact and your palms rest on the table.

'ethan.'

ethan's not sure if he is or not. he hasn't heard him but there are some days peter would shuffle out from his room for a water or snack and his eyes were a little red. there was evidence of crying but no tears, so he can't say with certainty but he knows.

'i don't know.'

it made up your mind. you can't do this to peter, you can't sneak around with his friend when he's still trying to mend what went down. you grieved the end of your relationship when you were with him, calling it quits was hard and it still is, but you were prepared. peter was caught off guard and he's still analyzing everything that went down, you know he is.

'so... are we cool?'

'of course we are, you were never a problem, ethan.' he looks relieved, releasing a sharp sigh he rests his hand over his heart and smiles brightly. 'oh thank god, i really missed you. so, are we done with the peter talk? are we ready to schedule our next crochet date?'

oh. he must've misunderstood you.

'no, we're not... we're not hanging out ethan, i just wanted you to know i didn't have any bad blood against you.'

ethan's not a mean person and you've never seen him mad at someone but he's hurt and his arms cross over his chest with a sneer.

'why am i being punished for what he did?'

'you're his best friend, ethan.' it's a statement and fact. it also has everything to do with you ghosting him. 'you were my friend too.' it's a raw confession, you can't look at him when he's this sad.

'i know i was. you were mine too, you still are. it's just different now and i'm not saying we can't be friends, but i think it would be better for everyone if we just took a break from each other right now.'

'it's not better for me. everything is weird right now, my best friend is a shell of the person he used to be and my other one pushed me so far away i was convinced she forgot about me.'

'it feels like i'm being iced out from all sides.' he's much sadder when he adds that on. you feel for him and you hate that you're part of the reason he feels excluded.

'i'm really sorry you feel like that, ethan. i promise it won't be forever, but i have my mind made up and no matter how many times you say please, it won't change.'

you're not sure if things between you became really quiet or if the dining hall doubled in sound. ethan's trying to come up with the right combination of words but nothing's good enough to make you come around on the idea.

If please doesn't work, he might have to force you.

'okay. i'll stop asking you to hang out with me.' he sounds fine with it, you're a little suspicious but he might've just wanted to talk to you, even if it was a formal goodbye.

'but i should go now.' ethan pushes against the edge of the table to slide out from his chair. his words are short but his tone is happy, you stare at him extra hard before nodding.

'i'll see you around?'

ethan sends a wink your way, 'see you later.'

---

the contents of your backpack are all over your bed, your phone nowhere to be found. you retrace your previous steps, you had it at lunch and you swore it was in your outer pocket at the library but after that it's blank.

it was either lost or stolen. your entire life was on it, you don't even have a way of telling everyone you lost it. you recheck your bag two more times even after holding it upside down, then fill it back up while giving yourself pity.

you wallow in it for ten minutes, not even a minute after that your roommate rushes in the door with her own phone held out. 'it's ethan.' you reach for it without thinking but pause before you can fully grab it, ally shakes it towards you. 'he said he has your phone?'

ally's unaware of what's happening and is being as helpful as she could but all you're thinking about is when and how he took it. you press her phone to your ear and ask him where your phone is, he plays dumb.

'i'm not fucking around, ethan. this isn't funny, i need my phone.'

'you left it behind at butler, it's a good thing my pledge found it for you.'

there was absolutely no chance of you leaving it, you clench your jaw and try to restrain yourself from throwing a million mean chirps. he sent someone to rob you.

'you stole my phone? why the fuck would you steal my phone?'

'oh, i didn't steal anything. you should be thankful one of our guys found it.'

'found it in my backpack?'

'did he? hm, interesting. but, hey! it's here and it's safe.'

'great, bring it to me.'

there's a pause on the other line, ethan sucks air in through his teeth. 'sorry, no can do, buddy. looks like you'll have to come get it.' your mouth parts in shock, that was the plan? forcing your hand to hang out with him?

'absolutely not. just meet me at kayte.'

'another no go, my friend. i'm stuck here and so is your phone.'

'you're not stuck anywhere, except in a house with my ex.'

'he's not here.'

'i don't believe you.'

you can picture ethan holding his phone into open air, he sounds far away when he calls out 'parker!' there's a solid ten second gap before he sounds crystal clear again. 'see? no threats.'

'ethan, please.'

'just come over, i promise it'll be fun.'

your eyebrows furrow, he thinks it's a game. 'no, nothing will be fun. this will be a business transaction and i'll be out of there in ten seconds.'

'so it's a yes? you're coming over?' if ethan had a tail, he would be wagging it. his plan worked and you're falling right into his hand. if it was anything else, you'd say fuck it and move on. but ethan took the one thing he can hold over your head and you both know it.

'i don't know how, but this is a rich asshole thing and you're being one.'

ethan ignores you. 'make sure to bring your crochet hooks!'

'i'm not doing that.'

'that's okay! i have a bunch of extras.'

'i mean it, ethan. i'm not hanging around!'

'what's that? sorry, you're breaking up on me. we should finish this conversation in person... okay, bye!'

the call disconnects suddenly. you stare at the black screen and take a deep breath to secure your thoughts before making a trek across campus.

---

'give me my phone.'

ethan ignores you and points to his bedside table, there's two waters and an entire box of grocery store cookies. 'here, come have a snack.' he drops his crochet tub on the edge of his bed. 'i got some new yarn, look at how soft it is.'

everything about it was a ruse.

'im serious, ethan. give me my phone.' he sighs and gestures to his desk, he keeps pulling out hooks. 'it's on my desk.' you search the surface, it's extremely tidy with no hiding place.

'no it's not. where is it?'

'hm... i must've misplaced it. i'll help you look in a second.'

if ethan wants to play dirty, you have no issue getting in the mud. you grab a small succulent from his windowsill and raise it next to your head.

'give me my phone, ethan.'

you're fighting fire with fire, ethan eyes his plant in your hold but keeps a straight face. 'i forgot where i put it.' if that's how he wants to act, you have no choice but to follow through on your actions.

you drop the mini cactus, the pot shatters into a dozen pieces and soil spatters around the floor. ethan falls to his knees and screams 'no!' at the plant guts covering the ground.

'she was a kid, you monster! she did nothing to you!'

you grab the matching pot that was next to it. 'give me my phone or the sister gets it.'

'i refuse to negotiate with a terrorist!' you're breaking him, you can see he's hesitant to refuse your compromise. 'i'm sorry you feel that way.'

the clay pot falls just as quick, it lies in a broken heap next to it's twin. ethan acts like he's been shot, a throaty yelp was produced while he delicately held the cacti in his hands.

the plants were fine, all you did was bust the pots. and while breaking personal property was a bar too low for you, you know he has at least a dozen more just like it in his closet.

you look up at his door to watch it crack open, it's a swift movement but it feels like everything is moving in slow motion. you try to back up as quick as you can but you're cemented to the floor and all you can do is stare at the face coming through the door.

'what the hell is... hey.'

you swallow hard, he looks how ethan said. just a shell of what he once was. all you can stare at is the purple bruise on his cheekbone, your heart pangs when it's reminded it's not your job to care about it anymore.

you point at ethan who suddenly is really quiet.

'he stole my phone.'

peter nods slowly before peering down at the mess around your shoes. 'did he give it back?' you shake your head, you feel like a tattle tail, especially when peter looks down at ethan and tells him to give your phone back.

ethan pulls it out of his pocket and hands it right over, your jaw drops and you frown heavily at him. 'you do it when he asks but not me?'

'he'll beat me up, you'll just unhouse my plants.'

'peter would never beat you up.' therefore, his excuse is pointless. ethan disagrees, his eyebrows almost hit his hairline with how confident you are. 'over you? he'd fucking kill me.'

you wait for peter to tag in, you know something is brewing in his mind. something like 'damn right i would,' and you'd follow up with something about how he's actually a big baby and he'd say something like 'only for you' and you'd... but that's not real life anymore and he stays silent.

he's probably confused and a little hurt you're hidden away in ethan's room, you feel the need to apologize even though you're not sure why you're sorry.

'i'm sorry, peter. i tried telling ethan that we should take a break on our friendship but he won't let it go.' you threw him under the bus in a second and you don't care, from the looks of it neither does ethan.

'you can be friends with ethan. you should be friends with ethan.' it's the first time actually talking with him since the break up and it feels weird, he's too formal. he's being kind and reserved, he's pliant and you need some bounce back to feel normal.

'you always said i needed to unfriend him when we were together.' you might've tossed a taunt at him, you wanted a reaction. you wanted your peter and throwing the break up in his face might do it.

it works, his eyebrows furrow while his stature hardens. 'i said a lot of shit i didn't mean when we were together, trouble.' you point at him, your tone ice cold. 'don't.' you refuse to acknowledge the small spread of warmth at the nickname.

'you like ethan, ethan likes you. you guys are good friends, why should i fuck that up? i ruined enough shit for you. the least i could do is give you ethan.'

ethan could speak up to make a joke about how it's like he's a child of divorce or that he's a person, not a piece of property but it feels like you're both having a moment that needs to happen. even if there was a weird energy he was picking up on.

your eyes narrow, he's doing this for reasons beyond being a good person. you know him well enough to know that he has something up his sleeve.

'i can think of something else i'd rather you give me.'

you can see the heat brewing behind his eyes, you got him right where you want him. peter uses his serious voice, the one he uses instead of raising his voice but still demands your attention.

'we're not talking about this here.'

those two sentences just told ethan that whatever you were insinuating was what ended the relationship and peter's very upset stance solidifies his opinion.

'oh, trust me. you're not talking about it at all.'

'we're not unpacking this in front of ethan. i'm on my way out anyway, hang out with your friend.' peter tries to step past you but you circle around to step up with him and block his exit, his chest brushes yours for a second and it takes everything in you not to wrap your arms around him and sink your face into the body you once found homely.

'liar.' he doesn't want you to hang around and he wasn't leaving. you're met with a heavy sigh. 'yeah, probably.' you can't stop yourself, you lightly poke his chest and peter's head drops so he can watch your hold stick longer than it should've.

'be honest.'

'you might be ready to cut the cord but i'm not.' he'd rather keep you in his life as a tie through ethan no matter how sore it was. if you had ethan you'd never fully lose him and that kind of promise is the only thing he wants right now.

'neither am i.'

peter stares at ethan, 'shut up.' he's shunned into silence. you're starting to understand why peter said he wasn't going to unpack anything here, you look down at your hands and play with a ring on your finger.

you think peter wants to talk about it civilly but you don't think either of you are ready to do it yet without hurting either person's feelings even more than they already are.

but having ethan around is a nice way to keep peter close without damaging your healing.

'okay.' you take a deep breath and glance at ethan, who's still pouting on the floor keeping his eye line from peter. 'i guess we can hang out.' he lights up in a second, looking between you and peter in case either one of you vetoes it.

neither of you do.

'sweet! i have to repot these but i have some new templets in my basket, so if you want to pick one out and start i'll just catch up later.' you nervously look towards peter and immediately dart away when you make eye contact.

turning your back on him slightly, you feel a little better. there's something about him that makes you feel jittery, like when you were the first couple times you met up with him alone.

'i don't think being here is a good idea, maybe we should just stick to my dorm?'

'why? parker said he was fine with us hanging out.'

'because maybe parker was being nice and doesn't actually want to see me here?'

peter can speak for himself, and he'll use the correct name. in case you forgot. 'peter, is just fine with you being here. the only sucky part is knowing you hate me.'

you think he might be baiting you now but you can't help but set the record straight. 'okay, hold on now.' you speak very clearly towards him, you're not about to let him twist your words.

'i am a hundred different emotions towards you right now but i don't hate you. i think you know that, parker.'

'okay,' it's full of sarcasm. 'you have a goodnight, trouble. i'll see you later.' you bite your tongue and let him leave, if you didn't, you'd be making subtle shots at each other all night.

'your best friend is a dick.' the second you're alone. ethan shrugs, 'you were into that at one point.'

'no, no. if we're going to be friends you only ever sympathize with me about him, you're not allowed to bring up anything i did in the relationship.'

ethan has a pile of soil and a pile of shattered clay, you feel obligated to help him clean up. 'and for clarification, i'm supposed to sympathize with your ex boy toy when i'm with him?'

'absolutely not. you're on team me at all times. shame him if you have to.' the broken pieces land in his desk trash can. 'is this where i have to remind you he'd kick my ass?'

oh, you missed and loathe this so much.

'you're so whiny, clean quieter.'

'is it too late for you to ghost me again?'

'that's it. clean up your own mess, i'm going to make a crochet snake and not because it's the easiest but because that's how you're acting.'

ethan snorts and nods towards his wicked wicker basket of yarn, you're already eyeing different greens. 'be sure to make one for my twin next door.'

you do.

you leave it outside peter's door and while ethan never confirmed it, he knows you're the one who made it.

and it sleeps on his nightstand next to him every night. 

[court-jobi]

i was just (re)reading your "reheat" oneshot and one part that stood out to me was izuku apparently "making a show" of him rolling up his shirt sleeves because reader finds it attractive. but my question is how did he find that out???????? did reader tell him that they find it to be alluring??? i need answers (just please dont do it nsfw, i'm not really into it lol) 👀👀

(btw i love your writing<3)

Ahhhh I'm SO glad someone caught this! I'm a sucker for the little details, and you found one of my favorites 🥰🥰 SFW it is~

And truly, it honestly shouldn't be such a saucy thought, Izuku rolling up his sleeves... It's a pure and simple fact that you love every bit of Izuku, whether he's dressed up or down. What's not to love? But here we are, and I'll tell ya exactly why.

How you came to enjoy this harmless little show was the sum of many 'harmless' moments, though they all have one thing in common:

Acts of Service.

Reheat shows it best, but here's how our darling Izuku reckoned it was a solid plan of distraction...

Pairing: Midoriya x reader

Reheat: ORIGINS

Izuku is an extremely thoughtful person, as we all know and love. He'll be in your corner to listen, tell you just what you need to hear, and do it all with a smile on his face. He'll also be the first to step up and offer his best if it would help make your life easier.

The first time you watched him do it was a night he came around while you were in a self-imposed baking marathon-- and were quickly running out of surface space in the kitchen. Once setting down his workout bag down at the dining table and shucking off his coat, he'd immediately come in reporting for duty...

'How can I help' chirps off Izuku's lips without missing a beat, and before you could even make mention of washing the dishes as you go (to help expedite the process later), he was already rolling the cuffs of his hoodie to keep the ends from getting absolutely soaked. When he catches you staring from he oven range at what he's doing, he assumes it stems from feeling guilty about putting him to work, or refusing the idea that he'd tidy up for you. It's such a high pile that's filling both sides of the sink already, and it's threatening to topple over onto your tray of still-cooling macarons.

He sees it as a stellar trade off: you cook, he cleans. It's a no-brainer in his book!

The next time he does it, you're visiting him at UA while he's hosting some late afternoon office hours (in case some students wish to stop by for some pre-exam help). It's a slow afternoon, and when he complains about it over text, you surprise him with a little green tea boba pick-me-up. By the time you arrive, he's on the phone with some insurance company about a rate change that he's been meaning to call about.

He's a bit grumpy over it. Why they keep hiking prices like this, he'll never fully understand, but would kill for some transparency in billing, y'know?

"No- I'm not interested in upgrading the policy, it's covering everything I need it to -back at my starting rate. No, no dependents. No secondary vehicles either-- maam, I rent an apartment; I don't even own a home yet- why would I need a byline for acreage protection?!"

Poor Izuku's brows are tented as he navigates the skin sufferable conversation... But all the while, he's flexing -a flick of the wrist in each movement- as he cuffs his sleeves towards his elbows.

You don't realize you're staring until he stops moving. Looking up to his eyes again, they're more confused at you now, with a built shoulder precariously balancing his phone to his ear.

'What's wrong?' he mouths to you.

You immediately shake your head, and just motion for him to carry on. You rest your chin in your hand when he continues, but he doesn't say more on the topic when the woman returns from the other end of the line with more bad news.

"-b-boating protec-?? Ma'am, may I be perfectly real with you? I-I am on a teacher's salary! Can I please just revert back to what I was paying before so I don't have to auction off my AllMight limited editions??"

So firm, so capable... so stupidly attractive doing such a small thing... Izuku maybe a bit preoccupied at the moment, but he's starting to catch onto you, for there's gotta be something behind your interest in his forearms.

Finally, it all clicks into place. In Hatsume's Tech Lab, where you're picking up Izuku from after an off-site field trip of sorts for his support course students does Izuku finally get what's going on.

He's taken up some elective classes for their class route, in addition to his hero course homeroom. In the R&D department, he's trying on some gloves and explaining their features to you in excitement for its intended recipient, his good friend Shoto Todoroki, while his students all bound off elsewhere.

"He even came up with the design; pretty stylish, I'd say! Much better than his first costume, less bulky as well. Mei says we're the same size so I could try for fit before she ships them out to him- hhhnr... well- still kinda hard to- c'you hold this one, baby? here, lemme get them on for real.."

Setting the gloves to your waiting hands, your eyes double in interest. Tongue wets your lips slightly. And shockingly, your mouth moves before you can stop yourself.

"Oooo, my lucky day~ Roll 'em up, babe~"

"that's the problem with this tech. There's safety resistance in the cuffs: they're great for compression, but it's a bit tight for tryin' to get over-- w-wait. What?"

Izuku chances a look at you in that one, thirsty moment.

"Do you-- like this?"

"Mhm~"

".. just- rolling up my sleeves? Like this?"

"Mhmmm~"

Though you've solidly convinced Izuku that his scars are to be worshipped just as much as his heart, he can't believe your starry-eyed look while he does this.

Cheeky, Izuku thinks surely you're messing with him, "Goodness the way you're looking at me, you'd think I was showing you my six pack..."

"Eh, that's nothin'," you tease, "impressive, don't get me wrong, Mr. Midoriya- but anyone can work out. This.. takes finesse."

Izuku sprouted a warming blush over his ears, wrenching a calm exterior into place despite your loving teases.

"Finesse, huh?-"

"Slower, babe," you sink onto a palm again, batting your eyes again, "you look good like this."

"Y-You're a mess..."

"I'm your mess now, handsome."

Izuku peeks up and out towards the hall having just settling his right cuff into place. Then, he's looking back to you all mushy at what he finds there. Complete love. It's earned you a kiss -to affirm his feelings for you, of course!- but also to get you to stop fawning over him where anyone could see.

Your fingers will trail over the sensitive undersides of his wrists while he cups your cheeks into place. Any insecurity he may have once held about his scarring has been snuffed out by you a long time ago, but Izuku now realizes it's not just an accepted sight, but a welcome one.

"Good to know this is a sure method to get your attention, honey," he'll whisper between kisses.

It's the preemptive motive that gets you:

Izuku is so ready and willing to help anyone at a moment's notice, to take charge and get things done: to the point where watching him prep to get his weathered hands involved is an attractive sight. He's the first to go the extra mile for you, no ask too big or favor too small.

It might be a quick adjustment to his outfit for comfort, but the look suits him so well. So yes, even as he rolls up his shirt sleeves, you find him insanely, unfairly handsome.

[poisonedprose]

hi hi saw you’re taking requests so i have this one that i can’t stop thinking about-

re4r!leon as best friend finding out the reader is a cam girl and then just something happens and they’ll make a video of them fucking together with a title “my best friend made me cum twice” or something lmao

btw love ur work ur amazing ughhh keep it up love you !

₊˚✧ you owe me — in which views are low so you do what you have to do

best friend!leon kennedy x camgirl!afab!reader

warnings: 1.8k words, smut, pet names (babe, sweet angel, angel), curse words, porn videos/streams, mentions of creampie, lil bit of sexual coercion, reverse cowgirl, clit play, fingering, (unprotected) p in v, praise, cream pie

masterlists

Views were down, which meant money wasn't coming in as regularly. Much to your dismay, your rent was due in a few weeks, and you barely had enough to pay for it. You couldn't really blame people for clicking off your streams, they all looked the same. The same setup, the same 3 lingeries in rotation, it was all the same. People wanted something new. You knew you had to do something, but everything was out of your budget. 

You sat at your computer, watching other cam girls to get ideas of how to spice up your streams. You clicked through countless streams until one caught your attention, 'My best friend makes me cum!'. You knew it was wrong but you had fantasized of your best friend doing the same to you. Maybe with the excuse of needing money, your dreams could finally come true. 

Clicking out of the stream and grabbing your phone, you call Leon. Butterflies in your stomach made you nervous, almost considering hanging up and pretending like you called him by accident but before you could move the phone away from your ear his groggy voice rang through the speaker. "Fuck, what is it? It's late y'know." He groaned. This probably could've waited until the morning. 

"Sorry, I just need some help..." Your voice wasn't confident, if anything it was shaky. You had guts to ask him for help with this, and for all you know it could blow up in your face and he'd never speak to you again. "Help with what?" He sounded more concerned like he was ready to help you if you were in danger. "It's nothing serious." You start, trying to work up the courage to ask him the burning hot question. "Okay, so what is it?" He asks in the silence.

You take a deep breath. "You know how I'm a camgirl? Well, it's not going so well and I'm kinda tight with money..." You say, unable to bring yourself to actually tell him what you need help with. "So, what? You need money?" He sounds genuine, and you knew he was. You knew if you asked, he'd give you as much money as you needed. He was always selfless like that.

"No, no." You sigh, you were far too prideful to take his money. You were independent, you could make your own money. Were you really independent if you were asking for his help though? "I need help with... Shit, how do I even ask this?" You mumble mostly to yourself. "Just say it." He encourages. "I need you to be in a stream with me." You say quickly like you were ripping a bandaid off. Leon was silent on the other side of the line. 

"Like... for moral support?" He chuckles nervously. You cringe at yourself, regretting ever even asking him. "You know what I mean, Leon..." You bite your lip, eagerly anticipating his next words. When silence hangs over the call you decide to say something. "I'll give you 30 percent of the earnings." You bargain. "I probably make more than that in an hour." He retorts but you can hear the smile on his face. "But, I'd be happy to help. Can't have you living on the streets now, hm?" He chuckles.

Part of you feels prideful. Proud of yourself for convincing your best friend to fuck you in front of hundreds, if not, thousands of people. "Be over in 20?" You ask sweetly, concealing your smile with a hand even though he couldn't see you through the phone. "Yeah, sure." And with that, the phone line went dead. 

You immediately start getting ready. Fixing your hair, putting deodorant on even though you did this morning, unadmittedly shaving anywhere you could, setting up the webcam you use to make such alluring streams, and picking out and putting on a pretty lingerie set. It worked so well with your skin tone, complimenting you like no other piece of clothing.

And almost on cue, Leon knocks on your door, you answer it quickly. Your heart pounded in your chest with excitement and nervousness. "I got work in the morning, let's not take all night. Not that I couldn't go all night if I wanted." He smirks, leaning against the door frame. His smirk falters and is replaced by a look of shock when he sees the oh-so-revealing outfit that's hugging your body perfectly. "Holy shit." He whispers under his breath.

"Short and sweet. Got it." You smile, gesturing for him to come inside. After a second of staring and he finally comes back to his senses he walks in, waiting for you to show him where the magic happens. You lead him to your bedroom, your webcam set up Infront of your bed, cute little stuffed animals shoved in the corner, against the wall. He sits on the bed carefully as you adjust the camera to make sure it's perfect. 

"Ready?" You ask, typing on your laptop, naming the stream. 'Letting my best friend creampie me!' "Oh, we're just going right into it? Yeah, sure." He scratches the back of his neck nervously. You give him a reassuring smile and start the stream, sitting next to him on the bed. You greet the people who initially join, recognizing a few of the names but seeing that the title has already drawn in some new customers.

Leon really doesn't know what to do, but he has a sudden wave of confidence. He puts his hands on your waist and pulls you into his lap. "Let's get started. The viewers are already getting antsy, they must be just as excited as I am~" Your voice was more seductive than when you were talking to Leon alone just moments ago. Leon knew you put on this act to appease the horny and lonely men, and he couldn't deny that he was one of them. 

With you sitting on Leon's lap, you spread your legs. Leon watched on your computer, the stream open and playing on mute. He was entranced by the way you so effortlessly turned him on just by opening your legs. You teased your viewers, rubbing your clit over your panties. You grabbed Leon's hand and placed it over your warm cunt, encouraging him to do the same. This felt like a dream come true to him, he nearly moaned just from the contact.

He rubbed his thumb gently over your clothed clit, you moaned quietly and he couldn't tell if it was just an act or if his light touch really made you feel good. "Don't be afraid to be rough." You whisper to him with a reassuring smile on your face. Oh, god, how he wanted to kiss your face. That gorgeous, perfect face.

He takes your advice, pulling your panties to the side with no warning. Your cunt fluttered when the cold breeze of the night touched your bare skin. He rubbed small circles on your clit, rougher than before. You let out a real moan this time, throwing your head back to lean on his shoulder. You held your panties to the side for him as you read the comments. 

'Fuck, so hot!' 'Wish my best friend did things like this for me.' 'Wanna see him finger that pussy!' 'Do you think he's really her best friend?' The chat was moving too fast to even read all of the comments. It hadn't been this way for months. "Chat, of course, he's really my best friend. Called him 20 minutes ago begging him to fuck me. I just had to stream it for you guys~" Leon grew hard upon hearing your words and you could feel it under your ass. It made pride swell in your chest. 

Leon runs his middle finger and ring finger through your folds before thrusting them into your weeping entrance. You whined softly. You'd imagined what it would feel like to have his fingers inside of you but nothing compared to the real thing. You bucked your hips slightly and Leon chucked. He fucked you with his fingers your cunt making lewd noises from how wet you were.

A ton of gifts started popping up on the screen. People were donating, and it was a lot more than usual. Knowing that people liked watching you get fucked by your best friend, made you like getting fucked even more. "Need your cock. Please." You pleaded to Leon, looking up at him but his eyes were trained on your swollen pussy. "Patience, babe." He taunted, a sly look on his face. He liked hearing the sound of you begging for his cock to fill you up.

You whined, not having any patience whatsoever. "Fine, fine. If you're gonna whine about it." He chuckled and pulled his fingers away from your delicious pussy, a thin string of your arousal sticking to his fingers before breaking when he reaches the waistband of his sweatpants. You only just realize that he's probably in his pajamas which, for some reason, makes this all the hotter.

He pulls his hardened cock out of his pants, resting the waistband under his balls. He strokes himself a few times and you're so eager to ride him until you’re hazed by his cock. You slip out of your panties and look at him, waiting for the okay to fuck him. He nods and brings you closer. He runs the tip of his cock along your folds before letting you sink down and take him fully. Whimpers leave your mouth, amusing everyone watching the stream.

You hadn't even realized how big he was, too focused on just getting what you've longed for, for so long. you might be hazed by his cock sooner than you originally thought. He brought his fingers down to your clit, rubbing tight circles while you got adjusted to his whole length. "Bigger than you thought, huh?" He laughed with a small shake of his head. 

You rolled your hips, making you both moan. You gave him no warning as you started riding him, letting his cock slide in and out of you so preciously. Both of your moans mixed in harmony. The chat went even more wild than it already was. You could only imagine how much money you were making. His fingers continued to work your clit, his other hand holding onto your hip like his life depended on it. You would be surprised if he didn't leave a bruise for you to find tomorrow.

"Could fuck you for hours. sweet angel. This pussy's t'die for." He groans in your ear, matching the pace of your bounces and thrusting into you perfectly. His praise makes you clench around him. A whine coming from your throat and a moan coming from his. Leon was embarrassed at how fast he was approaching his orgasm but it felt too good to resist.

His hot ropes of cum coat your warm walls. You can't even believe that Leon came inside of you. "Shit, sorry, sorry. Didn't mean to, ah~ fuck, sorry." He mumbles as he rides out his orgasm. "Do it again." You beg and he feels like he just entered heaven. "Anything you want, angel." Yeah, you definitely weren't going to have any money troubles any time soon at this rate. Maybe you can even convince Leon to do this with you full-time. 

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[hanafubukki]

I'm back with another Lilia thought! This one isn't mafia au though, so you can wait with reading it so it won't spoil the immersion lol ( I'm so glad you liked it btw 😭)

This one is about you being Lilia's fae s/o. When he went to NRC with the boys he gave you a cell phone to stay in touch with him with. You use it to play games together and communicate (I think it'd be mostly texting as to simulate writing letters to your loved one who's away), but something he'll never tell anybody about are the more private messages you share. Because he's an old man, sensing lustful messages with Lilia is like writing prose. Taking turns to write and seeing the messages show up in real time...there's just something about this old man and language when it comes to intimate times. He'll save the conversations to re-read whenever he's needy. There's not much video/photo sharing (again, to fit with the whole writing letters thing), but it'd be fun I think if you discover the Twisted Wonderland version of Only Fans and jokingly tell Lilia that you wanna make an account and have him as your only subscriber. He actually loves the idea, of you being needy and the way he finds out is a ping notification that you've uploaded a new photo of yourself- for his eyes only. You'd want the account to be private since it's for personal use but I can see Lilia maybe being adventurous and being into teasing other men knowing they'll never have you. They can see a few clothed pictures but the number of people who can see it all never goes above 1.

-Fake Date Sebek Anon

[Talking about this fic]

Hello Fake Date Sebek Anonie 🌺🌷💞

That Lilia Mafia ask really just hit me suddenly and released all the core memories I had and I couldn’t not make it into a flower shop combination. Thank you Anonie, that AU lives in my brain rent free 💞💞

God can you imagine?? The text messages switches between Victorian flirting to modern flirting and sometimes the combination. Texting each other how much you missed the other so.

Telling him, how you miss his warmth and his touch. How your own imagination and hands can do so much. Even magical toys do not help. Gradually it shifts to this account you see humans use.

How innovative and advanced. Of course you bring it up to Lilia and he’s down. As long as it’s only him that can see it. He loves knowing no one can have you. You’re his.

He loves to show off your more casual pictures but he’s full of pride. No one else can see you, feel you, or touch you. No one else would know your taste.

Hm? What’s this? It’s as if you heard him. You sent him a new picture. He’s happy that fae’s have an abundance of magic. Silver, Sebek, and Malleus can look after each other for a few hours.

He’s going to teleport to you right now. The urge to feel and taste you too great. His hands itches to shred the clothes you have on and Lilia is not one to deny himself of his favorite treat. 💞🌺

[itsscromp]

Had fnaf idea in my head ever since seeing the movie. Was trying to find people who were doing fnaf movies ideas and remembered I'd seen your ask box! Love your works btw

So I had this idea of night guard! Reader whose terrified of the animatronics and try not to get too close to them. But needs the money. And one night someone tries to break into the pizzeria and the animatronics protect them from being hurt/mugged

If your asks aren't open then feel free to ignore this, ♥️

FNAF animatronics x reader

Oohhhh yes yes yes, I love this idea very much anon. I swear this movie has reawakened my childhood. Word count:943

You were incredibly strapped for cash, The last job barely kept you afloat, you weren't able to pay your rent or afford your groceries. you were running out of options really fast. Heading to your career's councillor Steve Raglan. He said that there may be a job for you.

A security guard at the old pizzeria, but the place was abandoned. why would you be offered a job like that ??. He stated that the owner was just not ready to let it go yet. Not to mention, they had those creepy ass animatronics... There was just something about them that sent shudders up your spine. Maybe it was how life-sized they looked or the way they moved... its just... *shudders*

But right now you didn't have any choice, so you took the job. Your first shift was the next night, 12 a.m. on the dot. You entered the pizzeria and looked around, it was very retro. Save for the dust everywhere. You then noticed the stages on the far end. Was it where... they were housed.

"Keep walking keep walking...." You said to yourself, But for one reason or another, your feet kept walking to the stage. Your hand reached the curtain as you pulled it back, turning on your flashlight and got scared when the first face you saw was bonnie the bunny.

"Nope, not having it"

You rushed to the office immediately, not wanting to look at them one bit.

Once in your office you switched on the power, the pizzeria now buzzing with life as if it was never changed one bit. Switching on the camera's the first thing you saw was the animatronics again, this time two more you didn't see. Chica the chicken and Freddy Fazbear.

You also noticed another stage nearby, but the curtains were closed with the sign 'Out of order' on the front. Whatever that was behind their, you didn't want to find out.

Over a couple of nights, when you entered for work. You rushed straight to your office, not wanting to even look at them. God why did you have to be scared of animatronics ??.

Spying the camera's again, you just saw the same stuff as last time, but what the camera's didn't pick up was the back.

"Come on hurry up !!" A person in a hood said.

"I'm trying man !!" Another said as they tried to pick at the lock of the roller door before managing to unlock it.

"Alright, you know what to do"

The two entered the pizzeria with the malicious intent of robbing the place. the cameras picked them up near the supply closet. You quickly got up and investigated.

"Who's there ?? Come on out right now" You shouted.

"Shit, run !!!" They immediately bolted, you began to rush for them.

"HEY !!!!"

You ran after them leading back to the main area of the pizzeria, where you were met with a chair to the face, knocking you over to the floor as you were instantly jumped on, one with their foot on your arm holding it as well.

"Piss off and leave us be, or you'll get what's coming, kid !!!" He warned as the other began to search you for your wallet, phone and car keys.

"Get off !!!' You tried to squirm out but this only increased the pressure on your arm, threatening to break. "Gaah !!"

"Got their keys, come on !!" the thief said as he got up and turned to the entrance, only to be met by a large figure... It's eyes glowing red. It was Freddy Fazbear.

"What the he..." Before he could even say a full sentence, Freddy quickly turned the tables. Grabbing his arm and breaking it, Making him fall over. screaming in pain.

"Th/n !!" His accomplice shouted as he tried to help him only to be met with a sharp pain in his ankle. What looked like a cupcake which was a part of Chica's set was biting him, Even it and Chica's eyes were glowing red. You scrambled to the corner watching the madness ensue in such confusion. How were the animatronics moving on their damn own !!!, Someone had to be controlling them. But how could they if you were the only damn one here !!

Two more animatronics emerged, Bonnie and one that came from the Out of order stage, It looked like it spent a lot of time inside there from how damaged its body was. The fox animatronic then slashed one thief across the back with its hook, drawing blood. Letting out a blood curling scream as they immediately retreated.

You were scared. Fully and petrifying scared, Seeing what they were capable of, You hid your face from them. Completely frozen in fear. But what you didn't expect was Freddy's hand gently as a feather placed on your shoulder, almost in a way comforting you.

You started to hesitantly look up at them all, Their eyes all no longer red. Back to their natural colours. They all gave you a comforting look.

"Your... You're not going to hurt me ??" You asked them all cautiously.

Bonnie closed his eyes and shook his shoulders as if he was giggling, In a way saying "No we won't hurt you".

Freddy helped you up and gently brought you in for a hug. You couldn't help but smile at them, Wrapping your arms around his body.

"Thank you guys"

The others gave you a cute look Like they just met a new best friend for their little group. And that is what it exactly was. Maybe they weren't so bad after all...

Part 2 ??

Taglist: @callofdudes @fun-k-board @gooptoshi

[thewertsearch]

Mega-Giga Ask Comp: Part 3

@manorinthewoods asked: I'll be honest, I wrote the Locked Tomb ask having not read the Locked Tomb series. I literally only know the starting and ending strokes of the first book. That being said, I do like the half-soul-Sollux idea, and it works pretty well with the Locked Tomb's general theme of Lyctorhood, and how knotted the whole situation with Alecto, Gideon, and Harrow ends up being. (What is even going on with Nona) ~LOSS (4/13/24) @manorinthewoods asked: You know, if you hadn't already read Gideon the Ninth, I'd have recommended it as a good second liveblog. It really does fit your preferred sort of mystery. From all the clues presented, you could probably hit very close to the ultimate solution to the Lyctoral puzzle - as close as anybody could be expected to get. ~LOSS (25/4/24) @manorinthewoods asked: The Locked Tomb's prose is pretty good. On occasion, it happens to chime with a sound of 'Homestuck', but I only recall that twice so far in my reading. I like the skelebook. ~LOSS (27/4/24)

Once again, I'm glad my hidden agenda - convincing this blog's entire readership to check out The Locked Tomb - is bearing fruit.

I agree! TLT does occasionally give Homestuck vibes, presumably because its author is a fan. For the most part, though, its prose style is all its own.

Anonymous asked: Reference to American culture: the sphere of Jade's home dropping and the timer that preceded it are references to the Times Square Ball, an annual event held every New Year's Eve. A giant ball descends down a pole at 11:59 PM and reaches the bottom at 12:00 AM, January 1. I believe that you can figure out why the reference was included in the first place. Anonymous asked: btw the gamzee page was released on new years. ‘the miracle of a new beginning’ is the new year and the lab dropping is supposed to be a reference to the ball dropping in times square

Some America Lore here that I wasn't aware of.

I was wondering exactly what Gamzee meant by 'a new beginning'. Maybe Alternia practices the tradition as well.

@omnilew asked: the way you speculate and go indepth into sburbs features and how it affects the kids, made a silly headcanon that your kidsona is reading the comic while playing out their session though this is mainly because "Eventually, we were bound to cross a couple of wires that should never have been allowed to touch" kinda references chargerkind

I like it! Maybe my 'sonas have access to a more in-depth version of Rose's walkthrough, and are adding their own commentary in quiet moments during their own adventures.

@manorinthewoods asked: Your excitement over the resurrection of Dream Jade gave me a form of suspenseful mirth. Seeing how happy you were at her resurrection, while also knowing exactly what came of it, is perhaps textbook dramatic irony. If only you'd read a panel further… ~LOSS (26/4/24)

She looked so happy to be back, too! That certainly didn't last long.

She was prototyped with a smiling corpse, though. Maybe that was just her 'default' expression, and it vanished as soon as her actual feelings asserted themselves.

@thetinygladiator asked: 'I hadn’t really thought about Sally’s ectobiological parent - but now that I am, I think the funniest possible option is that it’s her landlady.' okay but i just gotta say… this immediately makes me think about how that relates to the house-building aspect. Like, with the giant tower, are they gonna charge the Imps for rent? That might work, honestly. Where do imps even live? Bet they don't have good AC or Wi-Fi, lemme tell ya.

300 GRIST/DAY NO CRUXTRUDER NO ALCHEMY NO PETS

@manorinthewoods submitted: How many computers would you have on your person if you were playing Sburb? Jade recommends at least 5. I say I'd have a laptop, phone, a spare of both of those, and computer gloves if I need to compute really fast. Also spare gloves. Speaking of the phone - is it possible for people to put phones in their pockets? Given Karkat (and a minor gag in Act 6), we can assume that it's difficult or uncommon to carry items without using the Sylladex - or maybe it's just tied to your dexterity, and you have to hold things gingerly to avoid captchaloguing them when you pick them up. On the other hand, there's no issues with accidentally storing something you've unstored and are using - so how does the Sylladex actually work? Do people just instinctively store their items once they're done using them? Is it difficult to avoid storing something you aren't using anymore? Can you stuff phones in pockets? If not, then why develop a PDA in the first place? Given the Sylladex, it should be much more commercially viable to make a tablet. ~LOSS (24/4/24)

Since Karkat can physically pick up a book, you can probably pocket your gear - although maybe there's a difference between holding an object and trying to add it to a physical 'inventory'. Either way, the issue is easily circumvented by employing wearable tech, like the kids do.

As depicted in my alchemy binge, my primary computing device would be the Pocket Holodex, which can remote into any computer in my sylladex.

In addition, my Modular Ring shirt is also a computer, which can presumably be augmented by adding extra mod1ules over time. I'd probably also captchalogue every computer in my apartment, of which I currently have six.

I'd be exploring the Medium with a minimum of seven computers, plus one pseudo-computer, plus a phone. Jade would certainly approve.

@iris-in-the-dark-world asked: the tension in act 5 act 2 is perfect, i love it. maybe even moreso on rereads, the foreshadowing and generally ominous vibes always get to me @heliotropopause asked: You're getting to the part where the comic really starts hitting its stride. This'll be fun.

The ever-present countdown certainly adds a degree of urgency to the situation.

I'm really liking the pacing of this current act, as things slowly progress towards some critical point - one which, for now, is still shrouded in mystery.

Anonymous asked: Forwarding another ask for the person with no account ~DJ: Eridan's deal seems to be based on Wizardry Herbert - a proto-Homestuck work by Hussie. A parody of Harry Potter dealing with whether magic is real. [] But Methods of Rationality began in February 2010, so "Harry Potter but obsessed with science" might have also been an intentional reference to that.-RM @heliotropopause asked: Eridan Ampora and the Methods of Rationality sure is an idea for a fanfic. He'd be so bad at it.

Eridan would be an extremely funny choice for a ratfic protagonist. He'd be so smarmy about it - and thus, a perfect addition to their ranks.

What would the definitive Homestuck ratfic be called, do you think? I think Tool-Assisted Speedrun would be a decent choice.

@killedthekat asked: An interesting thing about doomed timelines is how they serve to prevent stable loop metagaming. As a basic example, in a typical stable time loop scenario, if you observe yourself unharmed in the future, you can throw yourself into high danger high reward situations and know that probability will twist itself into whatever improbable knot it needs to do to keep you safe. But in homestuck if you lean too hard on predestination you just get shunted into a doomed timeline for your trouble.

It's true. Timehopping just isn't fun in Homestuck, as you're constantly walking a tightrope, desperately trying to stay in the one timeline that might not get you killed.

It's a good way to prevent time-travelers from becoming overpowered - something which is probably necessary for a comic which makes such heavy use of the concept.

Anonymous asked: Now that you're updating while HS^2 is, I've realised that while I'm barely keeping up with ^2, I just yelled "Oh! Upd8!" out loud when I checked your blog, so to me? You're the real continuation of Homestuck

What an honor!

For veterans of the comic, this blog is more Homestuck: Revisited than Homestuck 2. As a woman who would much rather watch video essays about old Simpsons episodes than new seasons of the show, I completely understand why some would prefer the latter.

@manorinthewoods asked: I've since finished Worm. I think Sophia's by far the best Vriska candidate. Lisa, Amy, and Colin are less so, I think. ~LOSS (21/4/24)

Oh, nice, you got all the way through it! Worm is an absolute behemoth, and I know a lot of people who started it, and gave up halfway through.

Sophia is likely the closest match to Vriska in personality. I agree with an earlier comment, though, that the most Vriska-like character in terms of audience reaction is probably Amy.

Anonymous asked: Cannot believe someone would propose a Homestuck/Locked Tomb scenario and leave Gamzee as part of a spare pairing, when the Homestuck fic The Serendipity Gospels, written by the author of The Locked Tomb, stars Gamzee and Terezi in the proto-necromancer/cavalier dynamic. Absolutely appropriate to have Gamzee as Ninth though, since his facepaint is the direct ancestor to Harrow's. Gamzee and Terezi is such a funny pairing to go with. I'm certainly looking forward to checking out The Serendipity Gospels when I'm done with the comic - both to compare it to Homestuck and to the Locked Tomb.

As am I. Apparently it was left unfinished - but considering how long this liveblog is taking, maybe Taz will have updated by the time I'm done!

Wishful thinking, of course, but I live in hope.

@bladekindeyewear submitted:

(I started Dragon's Dogma 2 a couple weeks ago and did my best to a Gideon Nav pawn (NPC ally), facepaint and two-hander and all, and the "Jaunty Straightforward" voice selection has been EXTREMELY distracting / game-improving because her voice and attitude chatting beside my player all the time sound almost straight out of the audiobook.)

Damn, you really captured her essence. Pawn is a very fitting title for her, too :(

@manorinthewoods asked: On the topic of blood color names - Blue through Purple were renamed in Hiveswap. Originally, Vriska was Cerulean, Equius was Blue, and Gamzee was Indigo - which I like more than their modern incarnations. I think 'bronze' might also be a Hiveswap thing, although I won't dispute it, and rust might have been renamed to burgundy? Maybe burgundy is a synonym. Idk. ~LOSS (4/13/24)

I think I prefer the likes of olive, indigo and bronze over more generic terms like green, blue and brown, which would quickly lead to confusion.

Vriska's blood, for example, is also a shade of blue, so it would be a little strange if blue blood was an official term, but it didn't apply to her.

@mxamericanblue asked:hi i have been absolutely BINGING your live blog rn and i gotta just get this out this is so so cool watching you react has been giving me so much joy, i don't have a computer so i can't really experience homestuck again casually when i want to but watching you read it and react and THEORIZE??? omg your theories have been so fuckin killer it's given me a new appreciation for Hussie as a story teller and how spectacular this comic truly was thank you for this, i've been having a grand ol' time, and it's all cuz of u

Thank you! I feel like I've been theorizing a lot less since I came back from my hiatus, mostly because the comic hasn't introduced many big mysteries recently - aside, of course, from Aradia's unexplained explosion.

(Pre-posting update: Since first drafting this ask, my statement above is no longer true, as Gamzee has been revealed as Homestuck's most important character. What the actual fuck.)

@lilietsblog asked: re fifth house aradia: she's an archeolodist :)

Oh, shit, you're right.

Maybe she'd be in more danger from the Lyctor than I thought.

@ben-guy asked: Vriska's ascension to god-tier is, in my personal opinion, one of the most visually striking scenes in all of Homestuck. Also, one of the panels you didn't include (which is understandable w/ Homestuck lol. Sacrifices for the sake of brevity) specifically the one where she has him write "[…] plenty of time for that l8r" above her head… Think about the position she would have had to move him to to write that.

…jesus, Vriska. You can't just do that!

@martinkhall asked: "What is treasure but a fortune, waiting to be found?" Or stolen if you're the THIEF of Light.

Son of a bitch. That's why she's a pirate, isn't it?

Because a Thief of Light is someone who steals fortunes!

@manorinthewoods asked: Eidolons. A species purpose-built to play Sburb, while breaking every mechanic you can solely with biology. Eidolons don't sleep, and live in a hive mind. Their psychologies are very poor at recognising distinct things, with Eidolons seeing the world more in terms of a blur of colors and shapes. They thus have a very difficult time understanding Classes and Aspects, never mind that their mythology never involved deities, and they never invented chess, or games of any sort… ~LOSS (15/4/24)

The idea of a species engineered from the ground up to be Players does raise the interesting question of whether there was a first species to play Sburb.

Of course, with all the time-loops we've been working with, there might not have been a first species - unless Sburb was 'created' in some sort of metatemporal space, 'before' any loops were put in place.

@manorinthewoods submitted: You are very good at analysing Vriska's psyche. Vriska's character was executed very well, I think, and I would hate her with a burning passion platonically but to a high degree if I knew her in real life. She's just… really horrible. She's a horrible person. And half her shtick is that she keeps evading consequences in spite of that. All of her mental torture of Tavros, for instance, ends in her becoming the most powerful player in the session. What sort of justice is that, Terezi? ~LOSS (15/4/24)

She hasn't entirely evaded consequences, but it's undeniable that none of the consequences she's experienced have actually stopped her from doing the things she does.

She's lost an arm, an eye, she's been beaten up, she's bled to death, and literally none of it has caused her to let up on Tavros, even a little. Letting up on Tavros, to her, would be worse than any physical harm, because it would be an attack on her worldview.

@sanctferum asked: "Has anything come of this since, actually? I haven’t heard anything about this new comic – although I do scroll in the opposite direction any time I see a reference to Homestuck, so I guess it makes sense that I wouldn’t." - The general feel I've gotten from the community has been largely positive re: the new Homestuck 2 updates, which have indeed been happening. It's being updated once per month for now, so a lot slower going than non-hiatused OG Homestuck. But I'm enjoying it so far!

Once a month seems more sustainable than Hussie's original barely-believable pace for the comic. With Hussie no longer at the helm, expecting daily panels seems like a pretty big ask - most people don't have the time, money or energy do what Hussie did.

Anonymous asked: I don't know if you read UTDR fanfiction, but this Tavros and Vriska situation reminds me a little bit of Flowey Is Not A Good Life Coach. she's trying to push him to his limits and torture him into being someone who will kill, and he just won't. say, what's your read on comparing Flowey : Vriska?

Flowey does what he does because he's lost his emotions, but Vriska does what she does because she's consumed by her emotions.

If anything, Flowey has more in common with Aradia. They're both time-travelers whose ability to feel is somewhat compromised.

Anonymous asked: WHATTTTTT HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN BACK???????? I THOUGHT YOU WERE STILL ON A LONG ASS HIATUS BUT I JUST JOW DISCOVERED TUMBLR ISNT GIVING ME POST NOTIFICATIONS FOR YOU ANYMORE EVEN THOUGH I HAVE IT TURNED ON FOR YOU AND IT WORKS FOR OTHER BLOGS???? WHAT THE HELL. IM GOING INSANE.

This has happened before - but before, I was also removed from Tumblr's search function, which doesn't seem to be the case this time.

Is anyone else having issues with Wertsearch post notifications?

@elkian asked: So has anyone mentioned the godhood joke yet? (The God Tiers costumes have hoods. God Hoods. Badum-tish)

LOL, I did miss that.

Anonymous asked: Fun Homestuck fact! After writing Karkat, someone brought up that the writer of the 'Programming For [Expletive]s' book sounded a lot like Karkat. Andrew responded by telling them to imagine that it was actually written in all caps, basically canonizing that the 'Programming For [Expletive]s' book was written by Karkat. At least, I think that's how that went? ~LOSS (28/2/23)

And it could be any Karkat, too. Maybe one of the Karkats from a doomed timeline actually learned to code from Sollux, and became a famous ~ATH developer.

@morganwick asked: So with conversation 8=8 apparently taking place in the immediate aftermath of Rose destroying her gate (even technically during Descend), and Rose's attitude towards Kanaya in the part of it that we see, does that change how much you think her attitude in their previous conversations reflects her genuine mental state?

Oh yeah, no, I’m pretty sure she was genuinely in a bad mood here. Not really so much because of Kanaya, and I think the anger directed at Kanaya specifically was inauthentic, but the bad mood itself was real. She'd recently been injected with several months of traumatic memories, after all.

@manorinthewoods asked: That panel, of John in Vriska's 'fabulous outfit', is actually pretty neat, because you can see from the proportions how young John really is. He's small, not even fully a teenager yet, and he's been thrown into this chaotic world of humans and trolls, quadrants, violence and danger. Everyone in the game must be scared, in some degree, but none of them ever show it. It makes you wonder just how strong Skaia's children really are. ~LOSS (29/4/23)

Seriously. In what universe are 13-year-olds the people most qualified to make universes? Sburb has some very funny ideas about the optimal way it should be played.

I suppose this is something that had to be true, though, for Homestuck to be the coming-of-age story that Hussie wanted it to be.

Anonymous asked: My interpretation has always been that "the Blind Prophets" are actually just Terezi herself, in a time loop-y/predestined way. She's blind, her class is Seer, AKA prophet, and those are her numerals. Also, on an unrelated note, but to weigh in on your last ask, according to Latin conventions, the plural of lusus is lusus. Does Homestuck follow those conventions? Well…

Or, since there are two Seers in Homestuck, maybe they’re Terezi and Rose. She’s a Light Player, so a blinding would be suitably ironic.

Anonymous asked: re: captchalogue codes and the states of objects: it takes a relatively small change in the physical arrangement of atoms and whatnot to turn a ghost dad poster into, say, a little monsters poster, but the two have a relatively large difference between their conceptual nature. on the other hand, it would take a relatively large rearrangement of atoms to make the slime pogo ride be anything other than a slime pogo ride. perhaps this makes the former change state more easily than the latter? alternatively, maybe the captcha system just knows that all it would really take to make the slime pogo ride stop being covered in oil is soap and water and it's happy to do that on its own, but paper is harder to clean so it wants you to jump through more hoops for that one new question: if john had used his posters for alchemy before he was able to see their defacement, would the resultant objects also be beclowned? evidence seems to suggest that players with unawakened dream selves Will draw on their walls in their sleep and not see it until Ready, so there not being mechanisms in place to deal with that seems less likely than the alternative to me, but especially considering people who aren't them Can see the drawings, how??? would that even??? work??? what would've happened if john had done alchemy with the arms cake. i think it would be funny to see that

I think he’d still get the clown posters.

The kids keep accidentally making magic items, so It's clearly possible for someone to alchemize an object with properties they didn't foresee. Therefore, I think John would make what appears, to him, to be a normal poster - but Rose would still see it as it truly is.

Anonymous asked: any thoughts on what the horrorterrors are? beyond their (admittedly vague) intentions?

I think they’re a sign of the wider cosmology beyond Sburb - and, more specifically, a sign that there is a wider cosmology beyond Sburb.

I don't know if we'll necessarily get more expansion on them than we've already had, because their whole shtick is that they're unknowable. Needless to say, I'd love to be proven wrong.

[loiswasadevil]

was your recent shifting session good? happy late halloween btw!

No and Hi and Happy Late Halloween but recent events within the Family Guy Community have been so strenuous for me and so Ive been shifting to escape my stress of this universe and the new episode schedule and Hiatus until December and the Plan To Kill Family Guy. When i was Shifting Peter was my Catalyst I know i should expect this at this point but Being with Peter is better than Being in Universe A Because though my consciousness transfers I transfer into Lois and my urges and Thoughts and emotions don't transfer over Except my Devils Heart is the Same But I digress Peter was pissing me off so bad I got out of bed steaming angry And suddenly I was back in Universe A. I was so Mad I know i can shift for as long as I want to I can shift as long as i want to I will shift as long as I want to I will be able to shift forever I can shift over a week I can shift for unlimited time I can shift to spooner street whenever I want And I can stop shifting whenever I want This is an affirmation I repeat to myself Even typing it affirms my shifting ability Nonetheless I returned to Universe B Back in bed with Peter some time had Passed he was asleep and I was still awake But I went to bed next to him facing away and I had a hazy vision / Dream of Myself in Universe A Which i've never experienced before. In my dream I saw Peter And I was so scared that I instantly woke up and saw him beside me So i got up and turned off the TV and i used the bathroom And tried to get back in bed So i woke up the next morning before Peter And I just stood there and stared at him and He went to work And I took the kids to school and Stewie to daycare and I sent Brian on an erand and I just sat on the couch for hours staring at the television without turning it on, staring at my reflection reflected back at me on the black television screen. My thoughts of Universe A Had never breached my mind in Universe B It's a seperate reality though my Consciousness overlaps Lois' becoming one. I locked eyes with myself in the reflection and I felt tears start to flow and suddenly I was back in Universe A Again even though I didn't have a Catalyst and I couldnt shift back. It was like i was for a split second trapped between the path linking the universi. I put on an episode compilation on YouTube along with a Shifting FQ that I sped up To increase the wavelength's effect on me and I tried to shift for another hour our maybe two hours and I could just hear Daddies voice Overlapping itself in my head I could hear Carter and Greg Both scream at me at the same time, Calling me worthless, stupid, A nuesance, Saying it's wrong to love Family Guy, Saying its wrong to love Peter, Telling me "I'm making the wrong decision" their voices overlap And I can see the reflection of childself in Twin Universi in both of their eyes in my minds Eye And suddenly I snap out of it And I turned off YouTube because I could hear Rent a cent er Customers so loud I turned off my lights and Decided to take an epsom both I Only have one bag It can be hard to get But i got it From last week So i put it in the bath tub This time Adding enough that it Stopped Disolving and i could feel the salt rub against the skin of my back and spine pressing into the porcelain, I laid back and turned off the water after some time and relaxed putting another FQ on my phone and Shifted again. I shifted for probably another 7 hours Before coming back to this universe due to my catalyst IE PETER. He was annoying me so bad, He had just seen the trending Gasoline and Bees trend and He wanted to try it at Joe's house and i was screaming at him No and he Tried it and got stung by bees I was so mad when He told me Why didn't you try to talk me out of this and asked me to tend to his stings

[goodomens-hints]

Episode 1 plot summary (+complete list of scenes) and more details about later episodes

SPOILER WARNING SPOILER GOOD OMEN SPOILERS BELOW i'll leave my inbox open in case anyone has specific questions about season 2 eps

Scene 1: star creation scene Crowley needs help building constellations so he calls out at a shooting star-shape that turns out to be Aziraphale, who materializes in front of him. He asks Aziraphale to hold up an open scroll with schematics for the galaxies. When Aziraphale does so, Crowley pokes the center of the scroll with his hand crank device and twists it, so that nebulae shoot out. Yes there is a scene where Crowley says "look at that, gorgeous" and Aziraphale gets flustered. They watch in awe until Aziraphale tells Crowley "you do know after 6,000 years it'll be gone right? I read about it in the Great Plan". Crowley gets upset and protests, questioning the almighty, how there should be a suggestion box where they can put suggestions, and Aziraphale advises him not to say such things. Crowley says it's not like asking questions gets you into trouble. They watch the galaxies bloom and Crowley veils Aziraphale with his wing as shooting stars fall toward them, similar to the Garden of Eden scene but in reverse. Scene 2 aziraphale goes to record shop Aziraphale gets a note in the bookshop that says there's a matter of great "ugrency" (misspelled). He visits Maggie in the record shop and she's crying because she can't pay rent, so she's prepared to move. Aziraphale says if she gives him the records he requested, that'll be equivalent to the rent she owes. Maggie asks how he can forgive her and he says "I'm all about forgiveness, actually" and leaves.

Scene 3: crowley talks to shax this is the one posted on youtube, though it's a lengthened scene that includes the beginning where a spy tries to talk to crowley on the bench and he redirects him to the guy feeding ducks. those are the guys crowley is yelling at later. there is also a part where shax implies that crowley owes her specific information? it's very vague but it's probably why she's giving him updates on hell. yup, crowley does say he hasn't seen aziraphale in a while but it's clearly a lie lol Scene 4: michael mentions book of life

in heaven, michael is arguing with someone on the phone about the book of life, i thought at first it was beelzebub on the other end but it's probably uriel

Scene 5: gabriel appears on earth maggie visits nina who remembers her coffee order (skinny latte). then they're distracted by the commotion outside wherein gabriel shows up naked carrying a box. aziraphale is listening to the records but gabriel knocks on the door of his bookshop. there's a huge crowd outside and the moment aziraphale opens the door, gabriel says "I know you! :D" and hugs him in front of everyone while still naked LOL. aziraphale gets really embarrassed and brings gabriel inside. the rest of the scene is the one on youtube where gabriel explains he doesn't remember who he is. Scene 6: muriel finds matchbox short scene where muriel finds the matchbox with Job's passage on the floor of Heaven. you can see a bit of this in the trailer

Scene 7: crowley throws mail and meets shax again Crowley is in a random street throwing the mail shax gave him into a garbage can. Suddenly shax calls and crowley picks up, snapping at her that she shouldn't call and appear suddenly at the same time. shax appears behind him and says "why not?" this is the pic where both shax and crowley are on the phone -- theyre actually talking to each other lmao. shax tells crowley there are rumors of gabriel being missing and crowley is happy. she leaves. Scene 8:

aziraphale is talking to gabriel and we get the whole trailer scene ("you know that feeling where...") but in the real ep aziraphale's reaction is SO ANIMATED, with him standing up and saying "No! definitely not! I have no idea!" LMAO it's so funny, he's so in denial. We hear FLIES when it cuts to gabriel btw so maybe beelzebub is spying? HOW SUSPICIOUS. At one point Gabriel says "I love you" out of nowhere to Aziraphale and Aziraphale says "I..." and Gabriel smiles, looking like he's expecting an i love you back but Aziraphale just says "hmm". People were laughing so hard at this.

Aziraphale calls crowley and asks to meet at the coffee shop. Crowley informs him that gabriel is missing.

Scene 9: short scene where michael and uriel argue because michael said now with gabriel gone, someone has to be in charge...

Scene 10: Maggie brings Nina a record but Nina doesn't have a record player. Nina reveals she has a partner (Lindsay) and Maggie gets disappointed and leaves. She bumps into Crowley and Aziraphale on the way out and tells Aziraphale "you're an angel" lmao.

Scene 11: Crowley is PISSED PISSED PISSED the whole time, in fact the whole ep he looks like he's about to explode. We get the coffee shop scene HOWEVER right before that Crowley asks Aziraphale "what's wrong?" and Aziraphale says "why do you think something's wrong?" all nervously and Crowley says "you only ever call for 3 reasons: one, you're bored, two, you accomplished something and want to brag about it, and three, something's wrong. And you're using your 'something's wrong' voice." YUP THIS IS THE NEW 'i know what you smell like!'. we then get the naked man convo and crowley realizes immediately that aziraphale is stressed and says "is it something i can help with?" and aziraphale nods and THEY IMMEDIATELY GET UP and go to the bookshop with a plate of eccle cakes lmao. once crowley sees gabriel he and aziraphale start fighting. crowley gets mad at aziraphale and tells him he didn't command gabriel to answer properly. He yells at gabriel "WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THE BOOKSHOP?!" and uses his hypnotism but gabriel just says "I'm dusting" and does the passive-aggressive feather duster motion. we get the "carved out for ourselves" convo .aziraphale says "fine, i would love for you to help, but if you won't, then feel free to leave". crowley says "i'm not helping" and storms off. he goes out into the street and says to himself "dont do anything rash... wait 10 seconds before doing anything..." but he's already emmitting smoke. We get a funny convo between nina and maggie who are watching crowley from the coffee shop. Nina's all "the man who drank six expressos! He's smoking!" and maggie says "well of course, he needs to calms down!" and nina says "no i mean actually smoking!" Crowley does the lightning thing (maggie thinks he was actually struck by lightning) and it ends up locking Maggie and Nina in the shop and killing their phones. Scene 12:

seroquel and muriel show michael and uriel the matchbox. It has "The Resurrectionist" on it. They are baffled that something material has made its way into heaven. We get the "Gabriel, I think he's gone to earth" line.

Scene 13:

Crowley's in his car and flies start buzzing. beelzebub appears in his car and teleports them both to hell using flies. This is the pic in the poster where beelz and crowley are sitting on chairs side by side. crowley is disgusted and spits some flies out lmao. beelzebub says he can come back and work for hell (and even get a promotion) if he finds gabriel, and that according to heaven, anyone involved in hiding gabriel will be erased from the book of life. crowley is teleported back to his car and begins panicking. Scene 14: nina and maggie bond while locked in the coffee shop. maggie doesn't drink wine and didn't party, nina opens up some wine and drinks it out of a teacup. she says her girlfriend makes her text if she's late by 10 minutes and that she must be freaking out right now. they see someone walking outside and try to ask her to help free them but she doesn't notice them.

Scene 15:

Crowley is mad in his car, speeding, doing the usual etc. Good Old-fashioned lover boy is playing!!!! Scene 16: Crowley arrives and Nina and Maggie catch his attention. They signal for help and he just goes "oh" and snaps his fingers, unlocking the coffee shop and bringing back the electricity. He walks off lmao. Nina and Maggie are weirded out, Nina groans because her phone is bombarded with texts from Lindsay asking where she is. Crowley enters and we get the "I'm back" scene. Aziraphale says he has to do the apology dance and Crowley is all "no way" at first but Aziraphale says "I had to do it in 1861, 1942..." and Crowley says fine and dances.

IT'S REALLY HILARIOUS. HE ENDS IT WITH A BALLERINA BOW LIKE THIS LMAO

So we get the "we need to hide him" convo and they decide to each use half a miracle so that their miracles wont be detected by heaven/hell. crowley will hide gabriel from heaven and aziraphale will hide gabriel from hell. they do the hand-holding thing (like in the pic). theyre not sure if it worked but crowley tests it by standing on a chair and poking at the space above gabriel LOL and there's a hint of a shield so he says it worked, and that he's sure heaven or hell didn't detect a thing. Gabriel is all "now i have two friends :D" and crowley says "We are not friends >:(" Scene 17: an alarm is blaring in heaven because CLEARLY they noticed the half miracle ahahahaha. michael, uriel and seraquel go to the globe and see purple smoke streaming out of the UK. they 'zoom in' and realize it's coming from aziraphale's bookshop.... (interesting that michael refers to aziraphale as a 'former angel' here)

End episode Soon I will summarize ep 2! Some hints for future eps too: -There's a big rain scene -There's an epic scene in the bookshop that took several weeks to film! (youve seen some hints in the trailer) -There are at least 3 jokes about aziraphale and crowley having sex that are scattered throughout the season LOL one of them is nina noticing crowley grumpy and saying "you look like mr. fell didn't let you top last night" and crowley's reaction is amazing. I'll say no more (for now)

[seerofmike]

my mom threw a fucking fit over something small on saturday and now shes behaving like more of a batshit banshee than usual. banging on the door like a maniac when im in the bathroom and trying to come in and yelling at me through the door about being disrespected cuz im not letting her in while im pissing, and also telling me not to lock the bathroom door or my bedroom door because she owns them.

also she tried to kick my cat.

shes decided to pay 2 months of my car note early (we go half/half) without telling me and i had only given her money for one month and then she bitched that i'm not giving her enough money so she's dropping me from her insurance, her phone plan, and also she's increasing my rent.

she's doing all this while bitching that i haven't been able to move out yet. i already pay for my own groceries gas school doctor visits etc so yes mom im sure i'll be able to move out with an additional 600 dollars in expenses per month now on top of all the other stuff ive been paying.

she is not struggling financially btw she has enough money to go to concerts every couple weeks and order expensive merch from korea. im not saying this to go "i should be supported forever and ever" but becuz increasing the money shes asking me for and dropping me from her phone/insurance is literally just a power play

[fertilize-my-eggs]

Getting some sugar from the king

A/N: this is other reupload, don't worry I'll be making three parts to this, I remember someone ask me for a sugar daddy shigaraki x reader soo I hope the smut in the next few days, btw this older tenko and he's gonna be season six soo not a skinny gamer boy. ( I KNOW THIS IS CRINGE LEAVE ME ALONE )

Warnings: ddlg + age gap + insecure reader + slightly antsy + little masturbation.

You sigh heavily, your face is covered in sweat as you begin to tear up a bit, you are on the floor curled into a ball… crap I can't pay rent for this apartment.

You feel stressed from college, having a job and still can't pay the rent. You pull your phone out and ask your friend for advice.

You: [ hey bestie… I need some advice for paying this rent and I… Idk what to do please help >n< ] 

You click send and wait for a few minutes, you hear a bing from your phone and begin to read.

Number 1# bestie: [ Hoiii~!! Uhh I'm not sure bestie but you have to promise not to get mad? ]

You: [ mhmm why? If it's something crazy then I will murder you -_- ]

Number 1# bestie: [ pleaseeee bestie promise me >.< ]

You remove the sweat from your face as you begin to type.

You: [ alright… fine I promise now tell me. ]

They were typing, then pausing for a few seconds then typing again.

You let out a loud gasp as your eyes wided.

Number 1# bestie: [ okiee!! How about you find yourself a sugar daddy?? 0.0 I meant I've been a sugar baby for quite a while and I-... Been thinking they will help you out plus you need to relieve some stress girly… gets some d in you😏😜  ]

You cover your mouth, start to laugh.. Me as a sugar baby??? Would anyone give me money that easily? You begin to sigh long and heavily as your head taps the wall.

No one's gonna want a fat woman like me, you knew your best friend almost your whole life. You were more curvy while they were slim and petite. She could get anyone that fast and you weren't really interested in dating in the past but hey gotta get some quick buck to pay rent.

You: [.... Okay I'll try but it's just gonna paid rent… you play too much lmaoooo 💀💀 ]

You: [ soo uhh how do I get a sugar daddy? ]

You hear the bing again and see she's sent a link.

Number 1# bestie: [ this is where I find my men!! Goodluck on finding some men and good dick~!! >v<]

You: [ STOP YOU PLAY TOO MUCH!! I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN…. But thanks you bestie luv u😊💕 LMAOOOO  ]

You see the laughing emojis and some spicy emojis along with it as you roll your eyes.

You click the link and it pops into a website as you begin to read, you get a little nervous but you need the cash fast..

After creating an account, you start to scroll, you see different men with different status and your eyes begin to wided.

How the hell do they get so much money??

You click on a profile that has very interesting photos and status.

Name: tenko shimura

Gender: male

Age: 45

Status: one billion

 looking for a long term, someone to keep me company and unlock a player two to play with. (Looking for 20-45 women, close by)

He's really an interesting human being… Wait, is he a gamer?? You look at the photos of him as he is in some casual wear, sometimes even a shirtless pic or two… you can't help but get flustered, he's pretty athletic and has some scars on his-... Oh my god is that a cat???

You zoom in to see he has two cats and corgi.

Oh my god… I need to message him.

You begin to type a simple sweet message hopefully he'll be interested in me.

You slowly get up from the floor to get ready for a shower.

You check your phone to see if he messaged back and he did.

Tenko: [ Hello Y/n, thank you for the message. Do you want to meet up? ]

You thought about it and messaged back.

You: [ sure!! We're can meet up by that new coffee cafe shop I hear it's has cats and I've never went there =D tomorrow? I'm available. ] 

You put the clothes on the counter of your small restroom as you begin to remove your clothing as you look at the message.

Tenko: [ sure wear something nice okay pretty? ] 

You start to blush red, wear something nice.. I-.. Uhh I don't have anything fancy like a dress.

You: [ oh I-... I don't have an nice outfit tho. ]

There was little silence in your room until you heard the bing again and your eyes wided more.

Tenko: [ don't worry, we can go shopping after coffee ;) ]

Your cheeks feel like it's on fire and type back.

You: [ awww really? You don't have to… you're too sweet. ]

Tenko: [ shush, I gotta spoil my player two after all. ]

You felt more red and had a huge smile on your face… it's just a payment for rent that all.. As you message back.

You: [ *link* There the coffee shop meet at 8am goodnight tenko~!! ]

Tenko: [ goodnight player two hope you sleep well ;) ]

That wink emoji… I think he's just being playful, you sigh dreamily as you hop into the shower, taking a long shower to get ready for tomorrow.

You feel your belly getting warm and giggle softly.

You start to clean everything, shave your body parts.. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't care, he seems very laid back and chill to talk to for 45 years old.

You wonder, he has very long hair, he probably wears it in a bun or ponytail then you feel your core getting heated.

You slowly have dirty thoughts going through your head as you dream of having a rich gamer have his way with you.

Your fingers slide down your wet body to rub your clit.

Imagine it's his finger and soft gentle voice whispering in your ear.

" you're so wet for me angel. " you pant softly, would he be gentle or rough with you.

Your finger speeds up faster and your other hand moves to your entrance.

"such a filthy whore, you love being played like this?" You nod your head fast into your own dirty fantasy.

You wonder if he can last long or have a big penis… I mean size doesn't matter to you but god hopefully he will be a great lover in bed and doesn't last like two seconds like older men do.

You quietly giggle, your high getting close as you slide two fingers inside.

" mhmm don't stop.. Tenko. " You mumble to yourself.

You finally reach your high when you rub your clit fast, imagine his body being close to you and smelling your sweet scent.

Your body twitches, shaking a bit as you sigh softly.

Fuck… yeah my friend right about one thing, I need to get laid fast.

You quickly get out, take a quick dry off your body then head to your bedroom.

can't wait for tomorrow you thought as you begin to sleep cozy in your soft queen size bed.

[gr00vyminibus]

Headcanon / If you and Jennifer had another child.

•• ♡ •• ♡ •• ♡ •• ♡ •• ♡ •• ♡ ••

* you both are roughly in your late thirties or early forties :) and Jennifer got a sperm donor.

Warnings: fluff, and some sensual scenes.

☆ pop up - updates!

[A/N: is it just me or am I coming across videos that lashana has liked on insta, she seems to really enjoy cute baby videos... 🤰🏿 Btw, I'm kicking out these damn WIP's cause they been living in my drafts rent free for weeks and thats what we not gon do. 😌☝🏿]

Taglist : @zeezeecave @mybonafidefeelings @masterajoy314 @xenaizogie @blacksapphhicmaddonna

•• ♡ •• ♡ •• ♡ •• ♡ •• ♡ •• ♡ ••

♡ You reassure Jennifer that her stomach is beautiful.

• "most of my clothes don't even fit anymore so I'm just lounging in nightgowns and robes.." you hear Jennifer on the phone with one of her colleague friends as you sit on the couch with a bowl of cereal.

• "Is it wrong for me to feel embarrassed, sonya?" You rip your eyes off the television and hum in shock. Jennifer waves you off and gestures to the phone.

• "Put her on hold real quick."

• "What?"

• You look at her as place your bowl on the glass table, "put her on hold" she obliges and once her attention is fully on you, you grab her hands and ask, "You're embarrassed about your belly?"

• "I-I mean a little.."

• "Why? baby its so beautiful, you wanna see what I see?" She keeps her eyes glued to your eyes as she shrugs with a slight head tilt. You go to raise her gown and reveal her swollen stomach with your precious baby remaing idle inside. You swipe your thumb across her puffy naval and lower down to kiss along the dark vertical line of her stomach.

• She nibbles on her bottom lip as you take your time and caress soothing circles into the sides of her waist. "I personally find it adorable, never be embarrassed or ashamed okay? it's gorgeous.. you're gorgeous."

♡ Everyday Jennifer has a new (and weird) snack craving.

• Jennifer feels your eyes piercing into the side of her head but she doesn't care when she's in the middle of watching a classic comedy.

• You watch as she tastes the spoon of the concoction she made just a few minutes ago, "Baby?" she raises her brows signaling she's listening.

• "what are you eating now?" You find a small smile forming on her lips as she takes another spoon and offers you some, "honey and hot sauce, try it" as hopeful as she sounds you rear back a bit and decline with your sealed lips.

• "Come on, try it. For me?" You gradually loose your resistance in her chocolate truffle eyes, Jennifer relaxes her furrowed her brows when you lean forward and taste some expecting for it to be absolutely horrid.

• But, "wait.. wait." You frown.

♡ Moments where you wish you could switch places with Jennifer because you hate seeing her in pain.

• "Is this helping, my love?" You cuddle her in your matching silk robes while softly massaging her shoulder blades and back. Jennifer occasionally let's out some low whines and short airy moans with a nod of her head.

• "Yeah, can you do this until I fall asleep?" You lean over her side and kiss the shell of her ear. "Of course, you know I wish I could take all this pain from you and harbor it myself just so you can have a good night's rest."

• "Are you insisting that you'd want to carry the child instead?"

• "Yeah?" Jennifer scoffs.

• "You're insane, I'll be fine as long you're around."

♡ You learn that Jennifer's body is getting more sensitive to things over time.

• "I want to wear something different.." you help jennifer take off her blouse with a light frown, she felt the need to change her clothes quite a few times.

• "You could fit into each outfit you tried on, whats the problem?"

• "I don't know, I just– the way it feels is strange." You smell the most recent peice of clothing she's tried on and blankly stare at her, "well their clean so.." She rubs her hand down her arm before scratching her tricep which is suddenly really itchy.

• "What detergent do we use again, darling?" Your back is turned to her as you put the shirt up and browse through her closet for something else.

• "Tide?" you glance back and realize her steady scratching as a light bulb goes off in your head.

• "Oh!"

♡ Kiiicckss!

• while you both followed the pregancy excerise tape a sudden kick occurred in Jennifer's stomach, "oh!" your hold under her stomach almost faltered.

• "I'm sorry baby was I being rough?" She shook her head rapidly and looked back at you.

• "they kicked.." a smile broke out on both of your faces as you gushed over the first moment of live action.

♡ when you come back from an errand Jennifer tends to be very dramatic about your short leave.

• "Baby, I'm home!" You could hear someone stand up from the couch and listened to the quiet thuds of her feet that came one step at a time. She appeared inside the kitchen as you lifted the last bags on the counter and immediately opened your arms.

• Jennifer liked to squeeze you sometimes aswell and you rubbed her back, "I was only gone for thirty minutes, my love."

• "More like thirty hours. What were you doing in that store?"

• "I couldn't help but browse through the baby section and I found these pair of shoes that I thought our baby could wear." Jennifer slowly lets you go as you reach in the bag and take out the shoes to show her.

• "Aww, their so pretty. " she took them into her hands and you smiled before looking at her cast down eyes.

• "Baby are you crying?"

• "No.." her voice wavered.

♡ Jennifer can get jealous sometimes.

• It happens when you both shop for clothes or shoes and she thinks the employee is giving you all sorts of heart eyes.

• "You're too pretty to be frowning, whats wrong?" in which she breathes out a stubborn 'nothing' that makes you say her first name so she can spit it out.

• "Patricia... sure was nice"

• "She's just doing her job baby" you slip on a pair of slippers on her feet while Jennifer raises a brow.

• "When you requested a shade a baby blue, she smirked and said baby blue? You didn't catch that?" A laugh of your own came out a bit louder than usual and you shook your head with sealed lips as Jennifer stared at you incredulously.

• "Let's try on this sundress." You walked through the store to find a changing room with Jennifer following behind you hand in hand. How can she be jealous when you both were literally engaged.

♡ Matilda checks in from time to time.

• "You just have to wait until she picks up" Jennifer's squeezing your hand as she stares at the call icon continuing to ring for her daughter.

• Suddenly the computer stops ringing and Matilda pops up on the camera looking she's doing something.

• "Matilda!" The now grown woman looks at with a smile and waves to the both of you, "Hey mom and mom" You chuckle and see her bringing some of her long brown hair from her face because of the breeze.

• "Where are you headed?"

• "I have to make it to class" she laughs with her creasing blue eyes momentarily darting at the camera.

• "Oh, did we.. call you at a bad time?" Jennifer glances at you, "No no I'm glad you called, how's the baby! from what I see it looks healthy" The brunette beams. Jennifer shuffles to the camera and touches her bare stomach due to her wearing a croptop.

• "It is! I wish you could visit us, sweetheart."

• "I'm hoping that I can come and see you both during December."

• "We're hoping too angel" you smile at her on the other line.

♡ You offer to alleviate the pounds Jennifer is carrying.

• You crept up behind her and whispered something in her ear that she was first confused at until you placed two neatly folded hands under her stomach and gently lifted up. She sighed in relief and thanked you before grabbing some seasons from the cabinet.

• "Can you hold the baby while I cook dinner?"

• "I just-"

• "Thank you darling." fourty-five minutes later.

• "Rotate, lean, to the right please." You sighed and eyed the wooden spoon she held near her lips, "taste this." She offers the spoon to you with her attention still on the steaming pots and you moan at the flavor.

• "Does it need anything?" She knew she could trust your word since you've been tasting spoons before you could walk.

• "Throw in a little more onion powder and you're done."

♡ ultra sounds

• "the gel isn't to cold is it?" Jennifer barely catches the doctors question as she shakes her head and stares back at the monitor. You're beyond happy that you were by her side as the probe circled around her stomach.

• "there she is, and she's looking healthy as usual." The doctor smiled at the both of as you marveled at the embryo shifting slightly in the womb. Jennifer's smile was bright and contagious as she couldn't take her eyes off her beautiful little girl.

• "I'm already in love with her.." she breathes out.

• "I hear you on that one, wait till you finally give birth and get to hold her in your arms. Its one of the best feelings in the world as a mother,"

• "Have you decided on a name?" Jennifer looks at you expectantly as you squeeze your linked hands.

• "Esmerealda."

♡ Jennifer can be absolutely adorable without knowing it, and you don't hesitate on letting her know.

• Today is an extremely lazy day for you both, Jennifer has her back leaned against you from in-between your legs and your playing with her frizzled kinks. Suddenly you're hit with a waft of warm cinnamon roast crunch and Jenny smacks her lips lightly after her yawn.

• You naturally watch her and witness that cute after pout she does with her cheeks, Jennifer feels a sticky kiss land on her cheek. She smiles as you continue peppering them throughout the day, seeing nothing to it. But the kisses travel to her mouth eventually and you can't help but squish her face in your hands as you do.

• "My baby.." Jennifer sighs as she folds a few clothes and tilts her head up for you to hold with your big hands. Her eyes shift closed as you let you the kiss linger a bit longer before parting like you usually do.

• "How many kisses is that?" You would always say not enough and Jennifer would playfully try to shove you away as she told you how much of a distraction you were.

• You put your arms behind your back and feigned being sincere about stopping but a peck couldn't be contained, Jennifer placed the last folded clothes in her hand on the armrest and pulled you by the neck of t-shirt. Guaranteeing that you would no longer be teasing her with a soft slow kiss of her own

♡♡♡

♡ (18+)

♡ There are times when she needs more than kisses.

• you stroke Jennifer's back as she's wrapped around you like a Koala on the couch, your other arm is against the armrest so your able sit up straight and watch the television but gentle kisses to your neck begin to distract you.

• you don't let it fully pull on your mind as you're sure Jennifer will give a bit a nibbles here and there and eventually stop but she doesn't. Her lips press into your skin deeper with desperation. She wants you to give in, do something.

• your eyelids start to slide closed as she sucks with an intention of making bruises, her hands feeling your hair and holding the back of your neck.

• "Mh, what are you doing?"

• "Take a wild guess" she kisses under your chin, making you smirk up at the wheat colored ceiling.

• "But you're on your second last month?"

• "When you had to step out–" Jennifer finally molded your mouths together, "I asked the doctor about it and– he said it was okay just no penetration– and doing positions where I put stress on my spine or stomach." You began changing your seating until she was in your lap ready to be lifted.

• "Okay then, I got something special for you."

♡ < BONUS >♡

• "Am I still attractive to you?" Jennifer asked.

• "Absolutely. Why- as a matter of fact point your insecurities out to me right now."

• "No, that's mortifying" Jennifer chuckles, "it'll make you feel better. Trust me." Jennifer sighed and for a moment you both were staring at eachother before she slowly took one of her hands from the covers and tapped on the apple of her cheeks.

• Next was her chest covered by the bed sheet and a pat to her thighs, "then my stretch marks, back rolls and.. thats about it." You got closer to her and kissed her slightly chubby cheeks before doing the same to every one of her stretch marks. She layed on her back as you included the ones between her thighs and across her waist.

• And she turned one last time so you could peck the ones up her arms and mouth on the whole expanse of her back, making it all the way up to her arching spine. "I'll love you in any way, shape or form. You hear me?"

• she nodded against the pillow until you gently palmed her sensitive breasts, earning an involuntary moan.

• "thought I'd forget about these huh, let me hear you say it. My body is perfect." Your thumb rolling her tender nipple made Jennifer whimper as you transfered to the next one.

• "Uhn, mh~ m-my body's per-fect"

• "Good girl." You stopped toying with her breasts and put a comforting hand on her stomach that she placed her own over.

• "Get some rest baby." She hummed and turned her head to give you firm kiss on the lips before snuggling her back into front of your body.

[raichett]

Fic Writer Interview :D

I was tagged for this by @definitelynotshouting :)

How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 101 works on my Minecraft | MCYT account, and 41 on my "every other fandom I'm into" account. That's 142 works published in total!

What's your total AO3 word count?

329,763 on my Minecraft | MCYT account, and 371,183 on my other fandoms account. That's a total of 700,946!! And there is so much more in WIPs...

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Ashes, with 2403 kudos. This is by far my most popular fic, which still astounds me a little as I don't consider it to be my best work. One I'm proud of, sure, but not my best work. Still, seems like it was a hit :D There is also a much, much better version of this fic that lives rent free in my head; of course, it is also a much longer version and I don't currently have the time or energy to dedicate to it :/

Well It's Not Quite Narnia, But -, with 2398 kudos. A deeply silly little rom-com of a Scarian fic. I remember this one very well, because I posted in the morning of the hottest day of the fucking year where the temperature hit a high of 40C in some parts of the UK and I was boiling alive in a trampoline park with no air conditioning while comments were rolling in on my phone's email. The heat was muggy and humid, btw, in case you thought I was getting off clean with dry heat.

Apple Cinnamon Pies, with 1946 kudos. This fic is the first part of an ongoing series btw :D It is also one of the fics that I, as the author, would recommend as part of my fic library. If you like Third Life, and you like Scarian, then I highly recommend you give this one a shot.

Highway Robbery, with 1728 kudos. Okay, so, funny story: this is the first explicitly Scarian fic I ever posted. The scant few earlier fics on the account sat in a "you can interpret their relationship either way, I left it ambiguous" zone, but this one had no ambiguity. A silly little fic with a funny meet cute, really, but quite enjoyable if I do say so myself.

The Day After, with 1656 kudos. Hey so you know those "everyone except Grian forgets Third Life when they go back to Hermitcraft" post-canon fics? This isn't that. This is, in fact, "everyone but Scar forgets Third Life after it's over and they're safe back on Hermitcraft (Scarian edition)" and I would also recommend this one :D

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I used to be very studious about responding to every comment I got, but I've since become a bit more lax. The thing is, sometimes there is no real way to respond to a comment. That being said, I strongly appreciate any lovely comments that get left, and I have a set of the best ones saved so that I can re-read them any time I want <3

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Judging by the tearful reactions in the comments, I'm going to have to say nursed itself well (or died) which is a DSMP fic with a bittersweet ending. Cathartic, and actually probably the best ending for all involved, but even the best possible ending can still be achingly sad 😢😢😢

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

Most of my fics have happy or hopeful endings, to be honest, so I wouldn't really know how to measure this one, sorry.

Do you write crossovers?

I want to, but I haven't actually committed yet. I do read them, though.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Oooh boy. In one of my fics for my "other fandoms" account, I wrote a courtroom scene (culminating in the guilty party being able to continue their road to redemption via reparative and restorative justice without denying or minimising the horrors they had caused) where the context was the idea of reparations after a huge and long war in which both sides canonically committed many horrific war crimes.

When this got brought up in the dialogue, just the idea that it takes two sides to make a war and that both had committed horrors (which, I reiterate, is canon), one commenter stopped reading the fic right then and there and came down to call me a genocide apologist without finishing the fic or even engaging in what it was actually saying. That was quite a nasty shock. I have since deleted the whole comment thread because it was just so horrible and ignorant (and I was not the only one who thought that because others replied to that comment), and everyone was being exposed to it.

There was also one other incident of someone being transphobic in the comments of another fic that had a trans character in it, which I deleted as soon as I saw because no one gets to use my fics as platforms for their hate.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Oh, boy, yes I do! More on my "other fandoms" account, I must admit, but most of them tend towards having dom/sub undertones in some way, with a couple of explicitly dom/sub scenes proper. Shout out to that 15.4k tentacle robot smut pregnancy kink (only the kink) pseudo-oviposition oneshot I wrote and didn't even post on anon. That thing shamelessly has my account name on it lmaooo.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge, no.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have! Apple Cinnamon Pies was translated to Chinese, and the next step was translated to Russian.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not really. I've definitely co-planned fics before, but not actually written anything in full conjunction with someone else. I have done some beta-reading for friends, before.

What's your all-time favourite ship?

I don't really have one, to be honest. I'm happily a multi-shipper, and will try anything that strikes my fancy. That being said, I do have a very obvious soft spot for Scarian, and for some other pairings.

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

I have this fic idea/WIP that I can only really describe as "Scarian but it's Bagginshield" which is a longfic in a fantasy world based off of the Quest for the Lonely Mountain in "The Hobbit" (but not 1:1 with it, and not intended to fit into LOTR worldbuilding). Scar is Bilbo and Grian is Thorin and I don't know if it will ever really be published but know it forever has a place in my heart.

What are your writing strengths?

Worldbuilding is a favourite of mine, and people keep telling me I'm good at it :D In addition, I feel like I do pacing well, and I'm able to convey complex emotional states for characters and how they change and learn and develop their interactions and relationships with each other. My dialogue, especially in the last year or so, has really started to sound like things people would actually say, which I'm happy about.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Balancing more than three characters in a scene 😭 Also I sometimes just totally lose motivation partway through writing something and leave the WIP alone for months or even years.

I have also been known to occasionally write myself into timeline corners by keeping things too vague on my end so I accidently overlap events or by not checking back at previous instalments, though I am getting better at that.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Make sure you get the translation correct, perhaps by asking someone who knows the language to proofread it.

Ensure there is some way for the reader to understand (via hover translation, footnotes, etc.) if the POV character is supposed to be able to understand. If you don't intend for the character and reader to be able to understand, then "the man turned away and said something to his partner in a language [POV character] couldn't understand" suits perfectly fine.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Pokémon, and I'm not ashamed of that.

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

The Legend of Zelda! But I do not have time or energy to leap into a whole new fandom right now, not if I want to keep writing for MCYT at least!

What's your favourite fic you've written?

Again, I don't really have one absolute most favourite nothing else compares fic, but if I have to point to something then I do have a soft spot for crown of broken bones, as I feel it's a little underrated and I really enjoyed writing it.