#it’s still scheduled to self rb

[byakuyasdarling]

The post is and will flop hard, but the Claudening has been prevented 💪💪💪

[wishbonemotel]

it appears that as of like. a day ago tumblr no longer shows self reblogs (on the same blog) in your notes. hm

[bubble-dream-inc]

under your skin.

The last walk-in you expected to see in your tattoo parlor in one rainy day was a massive masked behemoth of a man. It came as even more of a surprise when you wanted to see him there again and again; and a final time when he kept coming back.

Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x Tattoo artist reader

rbs greatly appreciated!

WC: 7K

a/n: listen, as a tattoo artist irl, the first thing i did when i discovered ghost had a tattoo was to think how i had to self indulge. i’d kill to tattoo this man personally. shoutout to @117s-girl, @somnibats and Eddie for the tremendous help when i had writer’s block, and @deafeningcat for the amazing beta read as always <3

tags: fluff, reader being horny for ghost, ghost being slightly ooc, mentions at verbal abuse, slightly suggestive and slight angst.

You remember the first time Simon Riley walked into your shop.

It was a cold and rainy day - like most days in Manchester - and you were idling by, doodling on a notebook by the front desk and listening to whatever was playing on the radio without paying it much attention. Glancing at the clock on the wall where the empty loveseat was, you were starting to wonder if you should go get something to eat while you waited, when the bell on the front door chimed, indicating someone had come in.

At first, you thought he was going to rob you, and in a second you were already kissing your expensive equipment goodbye in your head, cursing the fact you had decided to buy that pricey tattoo machine you were eyeing for so long just last week, but those thoughts vanished when the figure just stood in front of you. Silently, you eyed the skull mask and sunglasses that covered his face, wondering what was this guy’s deal, since it was way too grey outside to be wearing any sort of eyewear. Trying not to let his huge stature looming over you be intimidating, you were about to say something when his gruff voice cut the silence.

“You take walk-ins?” 

So he really was a client, you thought. Rummaging through the notebooks in the desk, you quickly glanced at your schedule, seeing your next client wasn’t supposed to come for a few good hours, and decided you were curious about the masked man.

“Well, it depends. What were you thinking of getting?” 

He stood still for a moment, and you wondered if he heard you at all, but suddenly he reached for something in the pocket of his jeans, extending a neatly folded piece of paper in front of you. His voice filled the silence again as you unfolded the paper, and you found the thick accent oddly calming coming from him. 

“I want it to be a sleeve. Covering my left forearm.”

You opened it to find a surprisingly intricate design, and it seemed like whoever did it made it with the intention of actually getting it as a sleeve. Not taking the masked guy for an artist, you found a signature on the bottom of the page, a chicken scratch that read “Tommy Riley”. Usually, you’d make light conversation and ask about the design, especially when it looked important, but something told you not to pry into this man’s business. Assuming he’s this “Tommy” fella, you just smiled politely, deciding you could fit the first session of it into your work day.

“Sure. It should take a few sessions, though, is that alright with you?” He simply nodded, wordlessly, and you decided that was good enough of an answer. 

Leading him into the procedure room after getting his approval on the price, you made sure to give him a consent form for him to fill out and sign while you traced the design to a stencil - making sure to cut the right adjustments to wrap around his visibly huge forearm. You wondered if he was a weightlifter of sorts, or maybe just a gym rat. 

Transferring the stencil to his skin and prepping your materials for tattooing was a completely silent ordeal, and your client seemed more than content in just letting the silence linger for the remainder of your encounter, and even if you were getting antsy by it, you were glad he didn’t comment on how visibly nervous you were when you wrapped your gloved hands around his arm to make the stencil stick - feeling his warmth and the protruding veins even through the latex that covered your own skin. 

“You have any other tattoos?” You asked, stepping on the machine pedal to make sure your tattoo machine was at the right voltage while he got comfortable setting his arm on the arm rest.

“No.” 

“Cool.” God, you felt awkward. “I’m gonna start now, tell me if it hurts too much.”

“Right.” 

You felt stupid saying that to a man that had arms the size of your head and was at least 6,4. As expected, he didn’t even flinch when the needles touched his skin, but you weren’t about to give up on your mission to make conversation with your mysterious client. While tracing it with the machine, you analyzed the design a bit closer.

“That’s some interesting art.” It wasn’t. It was tacky as hell, all missiles and skulls and other edgy elements, but you were not going to say that to him. “You like guns?”

“Something like that.” 

You gave up trying to chat him up shortly after. Even with the weird dad sunglasses on, you could still feel his stare on you, unnerving at best, and you wondered what was up with the mask. In your line of work, you’d met some interesting individuals, and you considered your shop a safe haven for all outcasts and misfits; you’d known, after all you did decide to pursue tattooing as a career. Still, something about this man - Tommy? - made you feel an itch to see what lied beyond the mask - both figuratively and literally.  At least it would take a few more sessions to finish his piece, hopefully he’d say more than five words at once to you at some point. 

It took you two hours to finish tracing it, and you deemed it was good to go and begin shading another day. Getting into professional mode, you gave him directions on how to care for it and asked him to come back after a month to start on shading it, and, as expected, he only nodded to you. Going back to the front desk, he handed the bills containing the price you had settled on, and turned around, leaving without another word. Out of curiosity, you picked up his file. The first thing you noticed was that he had left the “Occupation” space blank.

The second thing you noticed was that the signature read “Simon Riley”.

☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆

Simon didn’t come back after a month. 

A good few months later, you just figured he’d given up and was now walking around with an unfinished tattoo, or, worse, he had picked another artist to finish the job, and the thought made you angrier than you’d like to admit. Despite your annoyance, whenever you’d organize your clients files, you’d find yourself lingering on his, weirdly curious and feeling like he was a puzzle you were dying to solve.

A long time passed - you don’t know how much, but you’d say it was more than a year - before he showed up again, and, once again, it was unannounced. You were finishing a client’s tattoo when your friend - and coworker - knocked on the procedure room door, and when you’d told her to come in, she looked like she had seen a ghost. 

“There’s a guy in the waiting room asking for you. Said you were doing his sleeve…” She quietly announced, and you just stared at her quizzically, waiting for her to continue. "He 's…Big. Tall guy with a creepy skull mask.” 

She whispered the last part so he wouldn’t hear it, even if he was a good corridor distance away and the metal music coming from the radio would drown it out, and after a few moments you realized she was talking about Simon.  You remember answering something to her and finishing the tattoo on auto pilot before heading to the front desk, and, sure enough, Simon was standing there menacingly, in his whole huge aura, seemingly unbothered by how his height, frame, and mask were making the other clients in the shop regard him with uneasy looks. His eyes met yours once you showed up. You noticed he wasn’t wearing the sunglasses anymore, and his fabric mask had been replaced by a simpler balaclava and a hard skull mask on top that you hoped was made out of a synthetic material. 

Now bare, his gaze revealed its intensity to you, the dark hues following your every move in a way you supposed you could find intimidating if a small, very weird part of you didn’t find it attractive. He seemed tired, eyes cast downwards and with bags surrounding it, and you wondered what had happened when he was gone. 

“Hey.” You breathed, straining your neck to look up at him and completely forgetting about the other people in the room. “Riley, right? I’m guessing you’re here for the sleeve?”

He seemed slightly surprised you remembered his name, but the impression of seeing emotion in his eyes was gone in an instant as he simply nodded at you.

“Yeah. You got time?”

You didn’t. But you’d make it work, you weren’t about to send away the man who had, for some reason, plagued your thoughts so much for the last months. 

“I got a few more clients, but if you don’t mind waiting, i can fit you in?”

You hated how uneasy you sounded, your hands fiddling with a stray loose line of your ripped jeans as you waited for his answer.

“That works.” 

With his gruff reply, he turned and sat down in the waiting area, and you released a breath you hadn't realized you were holding. 

The hours went by, the clients came and went to and from your procedure room as well as your colleague’s, yet, every single time you left the room to go to the front desk have a sip of water or check your next client’s name, Simon was still there, patiently waiting, the loveseat seeming oddly small under him, and his all black, dark getup blending perfectly with the black walls of the studio. If anything, it made you even more intrigued, since most people would have left by now, considering how long a tattoo takes and he could just come back another day, but he didn’t show any signs of having anywhere else to be. The people traffic started to wind down, and soon enough, you dismissed your last client of the day as you were the only artist left in the shop and the sun had already hid in the horizon. 

“Glad to see you again. I was wondering if you had gotten another artist.” You laughed somewhat nervously, taking a breather by the glass door while Simon finished filling out another responsibility form, and you had to ignore how nervous you felt when he turned to glance at you with those dark and intense eyes of his.

“Got busy, that’s all.” He murmured, setting the pen down on the front desk and turning to the wall where your flash pieces were displayed. “And I like your work.”

Feeling your eyes widen, you tried to conceal how flustered the comment made you feel behind a cool chuckle, but something told you Simon could see right through you. Going back inside and pointing him towards the procedure room, you briefly glanced at the fresh consent form and realized he filled out his occupation this time, the words “Army” surprisingly not phasing you one bit.

Simon was the same as the last time, quiet as a grave. But, seeing as you were wrapping up the shading quicker than you’d anticipated, you decided this time you would not let this mysterious man walk out of your studio - possibly forever - without at least getting one piece of information out of him.

“So…does it mean anything?” You nodded towards his arm, trying to play it cool. Being in this field, you quickly realized not everyone gets tattoos that mean anything, and most of them are really just for aesthetics, but the signature below the original design had you wondering, even if the newfound information that he was in the military made the over the top missiles and dog tags inked on his arm make a lot more sense. He stared at you from behind the mask for a moment, making you feel queasy under his stare and suddenly very aware of how much you were draped over his arm trying to get the shading on one particular skull to look just right.

“Yeah.” After a few moments he replied, a wave of sudden relief washing over you upon realizing you had not, in fact, crossed a line. “My brother made it.”

“He’s quite the artist.”

“He really was.”

Oh. 

You decided to drop the subject after the implication.

“And what branch are you in?” Not looking at him, you spoke in a low tone, too concentrated on the machine in your hands to realize you were maybe asking more than he was comfortable talking. “You know, uh, in the army.”

“Special Air Forces.” You realized he tensed almost imperceptibly, relaxing once you only hummed.

“Cool. I’d reckon you guys had tattoo parlors closer to base, though.” 

“We do.” He huffed. “But I know the guys. Not nearly as clean as here.”

At that, you chuckled gently, missing the way Simon’s eyes softened at the sound.

You continued the piece in comfortable silence, distantly registering the pitter-patter of the rain that had just started falling on the street beyond the front doors. Finishing it up, faster than you would have liked, you decided the corny design looked good - really good - on him, and he might have been the only guy possible to pull it off, which could have been related to how big and strong his arms looked. Wrapping the tattoo in plastic film and reminding him to not keep it on for too long, you had to focus on acting professional and not let him know you were ogling at the recently inked piece of skin. The long sleeve shirt he had rolled up to his forearms did not help you one bit, nor did the way his eyes followed your every single movement.

When you got back to the front desk - relieved to find the rain had stopped - you expected Simon to just pay and leave silently the same way he did the last time, but he actually lingered, letting his eyes wander through the flash pieces displayed in a neat corkboard in the waiting room - this one with your name written on top. You actually don’t know when he got your name - something told you it was when he asked your coworker for you. He seemed quite interested in one particular design that had been gathering dust for a long time on the board, considering how big it was.

“See something you like?” You followed his gaze, realizing it was a ram skull chest piece you had completely forgotten about; it looked too dark and menacing for most people looking for walk-ins and flash tattoos. “That one was meant to be a chest piece. Works for the back, too.”

Simon studied it for a few moments. What was up with this guy and skulls? Finally, he turned to you.

“When can you do it?”

☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆

The third time Simon Riley walked into your studio, it was, by far, the most memorable one. 

Unsurprisingly enough, he had decided to set an appointment for the chest piece to be the last one of your day, a week later; whether he enjoyed the night time better or just wanted to not be bothered with other people around, that was a mystery to you. There was a third option in the back of your head, but you told yourself it was delusional, and your fascination with the masked man was, in fact, one sided. That didn’t stop you from greeting him with a cheery smile as you looked up from where you were doodling on your notebook on the front desk, pretty much like your first encounter. However, you didn’t think too much of what exactly the chest piece implied as you headed to your procedure room with Simon in tow. It hit you like a ton of bricks when you freezed for a second, holding up the carbon stencil in your hands.

“Uh, you might wanna…take off your shirt. It’ll be more comfortable for you.” 

Preparing the stencil gel, you tried your best to ignore him and not let your eyes wander too much as he lifted the unnecessarily tight black t-shirt over his head, careful as to not remove the balaclava and skull mask combo, folding it neatly and setting the piece of cloth over your table before standing next to you in front of the full body mirror. 

I’m a professional. I’m a professional. I’m a professional.

If you thought Simon was huge before, that was an understatement. 6,4 feet of pure, naked muscle stood inches away from your much smaller body, and you were extremely relieved to realize that he had, probably out of consideration for you, shaved his chest beforehand - the same couldn’t be said for the faint happy trail very clearly peeking from his jeans, sitting way lower on his hips than you’d like. Scolding yourself over and over for fawning like a horny teenager, you hoped the nervous tremble in your hands as you delicately smoothed the gel over his collarbones wasn’t as obvious as you felt it was. Even through the latex gloves you could feel the heat coming from his pecs, as well as a few minor scars that shouldn’t give you too much trouble. You decided to ignore the very visible and very big bullet scar on his side. As he adjusted his dog tags to hang behind his neck so as to not get in your way, you finally peeled the stencil off, trying to calm your frantic beating heart as he analyzed it in the mirror to make sure it was in the right placement. 

It got worse when he actually laid on the tattoo table - comically dwarfed under his enormous frame. Sure, you had tattooed a fair share of chests along the years - both men’s and women’s - and it never really flustered you, after all, it was your job, seeing skin was a very big part of it. However, as you lowered your torso on the bed and tried to adjust your hand to sit as comfortably as possible on his chest, you thanked the gods it was such a big tattoo; you had no idea how you wouldn’t mess it up if it was a tiny one. But you doubted Simon would ever get a tiny tattoo. Above all, you could appreciate how he maintained his breathing slow and steady and, again, didn’t even flinch as the needles touched him, making you like him as a client even more. 

“I’ve heard you guys in the army got��codenames?” You started, desperate to start some conversation before your intrusive thoughts won. “What do they call you?”

Slowly, you were getting used to his brief silence before answering you. It seemed like his way to decide if your question was worth answering or not, and you were glad he had found them all to be so far. 

“Ghost.”

“Very fitting.”

You were surprised to hear him exhale in a way that resembled a very weak laugh, and you felt giddy knowing you made your ever so quiet and serious client laugh - or something like that. Feeling calmer, you continued the very big piece, strapping in for a long next couple of hours.

They passed quickly, your hand working almost in autopilot as you traced the tattoo’s lineart and made light conversation with Simon - Ghost. You learned he was a Lieutenant, liked bourbon and the mask never came off. Granted, it was mostly you speaking and him answering, but you were glad he was entertaining your nervous ramblings, and you were only slightly embarrassed to admit to yourself you found his southern British accent very soothing on his deep, gruffy voice. In turn, you told him a little more about yourself; why you got into tattooing and even a few funny stories from dealing with past clients. 

Finally deciding it was enough strain on his skin for one session, you set your machine down and admired your work, smiling under your mask. Taking a generous amount of the tattooing balm on your fingers, you swallowed your nervousness before gently spreading the substance on his chest so it would heal nicely, not missing the way he relaxed under your touch. If you weren’t so busy panicking by having your hands on such a massive and attractive man, you could ponder on how he seemed to be enjoying that as much as you were. With your approval, he got up to examine the piece on the mirror, and you caught yourself staring into his strong, chiseled, and scarred back, before averting your eyes, choosing to focus instead on cleaning up the inky mess you made on your trolley. You once again went through the now familiar ordeal of him silently thanking you, paying, and leaving into the night.

As Simon Riley left the studio that day, carrying an unfinished piece of your work right on his chest, you realized something clearly had changed in the air between you two. You just had no idea if it was a good or bad thing.

☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆

The next time Simon showed up, a month later, you were stressed out of your mind.

You were booked, so you didn’t really have any open spots next to closing time the way he liked it, so he had to settle for coming a bit earlier than usual, which meant there were actually other people in the studio for once, including the one on the front desk yelling in your face.

You couldn’t really remember what he was yelling about, just that you were suddenly regretting your decision of working with people and wondering if it was worth it to stoop down low and insult him back the way he was doing to you. You figured the moment he started yelling about his already finished tattoo that it was most likely another scam attempt coming from him, but it didn’t really matter anymore once you zeroed in on the hulking figure that showed up unexpectedly behind your unpleasant client in the form of your masked savior. For a moment, you were scared things were going to get violent, but Simon didn’t have to do much. It took one glower from him, his gaze sharp enough to cut from way above the smaller man, and he was suddenly stuttering apologies and leaving the studio in a hurry. You ignored the looks the other people in the waiting room were giving the two of you, offering a tired, but extremely grateful smile, to Ghost.

“Hey, Riley.”

He was still staring at where the man had left, and the annoyance on his usually so stoic gaze came as a surprise to you. 

“What happened?” 

You were already heading into the procedure room, too shaken to deal with the stares of the people in the waiting room any longer, and shot him a sheepish look from over your shoulder. 

“Just a rude client being difficult. Not the first time he gave me trouble, either, but it happens.” 

Simon didn’t seem too happy with your answer, but he let it slide, for the moment. Heading into the room and closing the door behind you, the air fell into a familiar silence, broken only by the cluttering sounds as you set up your supplies, and, to you, your still frantic heartbeat in your ears by the less than pleasant interaction just a few minutes earlier. It was unlikely, given how observant he was, but you hoped Simon didn’t pick up on just how shaken you were. Still, you took a few moments to calm yourself down as you tested the machine with your feet; Simon had already made himself comfortable on the table, and soon enough you fell into the rhythm of inking him, the same way you had grown used to in those last few months. Focusing on a particularly stubborn piece of skin where the ink didn’t paint as easily, you were lost in thought when his voice pulled you back to reality.

“Are you scared of me?” You heard him ask quietly from above you, instantly knowing he was referring to the way your earlier client had run off on the sight of him. Pausing your ministrations, you looked up from his chest to find him already staring at you in a way that made your heart skip a beat. Since you were currently working on the details on his collarbone, you haven’t realized how close you actually were to his face, and suddenly you were hit with the realization you could feel his breath through both your masks; and an intoxicating scent of cigarette smoke and cologne. Caught in a trance by his dark gaze, you realized a little too late you were gawking and not really answering his question, which made you feel very glad for the surgical mask covering your suddenly very red face and flustered expression. Looking down to continue your work, you tried to find your words once again.

“Not really. I mean, the mask was off-putting at first, but I've had some odd people as clients. You’re cool, though. You remind me of those big, scary guard dogs, but in a good way.” Cringing at the lame answer, you felt like a kid talking to her crush in middle school all over again, and the huff-slash-chuckle that left Simon only made it worse. It seemed like he wanted to say something else, but he didn’t, and in your flustered stupor you couldn’t find any words either, so you just let the air around you fall into a comfortable silence over again. If it were anyone else, you’d be wary of the constant quietness, but, for some reason, Simon’s presence was enough to make you content, even if no words were exchanged. 

Blacking out the parts that had to be inked was a piece of cake for you and your enormous needle - which you were glad was being used on Simon, since, most of your other clients would have been crying from the pain only halfway done with the black - and soon enough you were heading out to the front with him, readying yourself to bid him goodbye and, disappointedly, only see him again in the next month, once his tattoo was healed enough for another session, however, as you approached the waiting room, he made no move to leave. You thought maybe he was, again, inspecting your work displayed on the wall, the prospect of continuing to tattoo him after his chest piece was done getting you giddy already, but he was looking nowhere but in your direction, eyes unreadable behind the skull mask.

“I’ll wait until you close. Who knows if that asshole won’t come back expecting me not to be here anymore.” 

Blinking up at him, it took you a few moments to process what he had murmured under his breath, and, in an instant, your heart rate shot up as you tried to wrap your head around the implications. Had it been any other client, you would have laughed it off, telling him not to worry and that you could take care of yourself, but it wasn’t just about anyone. It was him. And for some reason, the fact made you only wordlessly agree with a nod of your head and wide eyes, certain he could now see how clearly flustered and red your face looked. An intrusive part of your brain was screaming at you that he was just being nice, and that the protectiveness was just because of his job and nothing else, but you’d entertain these thoughts later - if ever.

So, much like the second time you’d met him, the rest of your afternoon was spent with seeing Ghost’s massive figure patiently waiting in the way too small loveseat in the front room of the studio, living up to the scary guard dog imagery you had joked about to him, except, this time, in between clients you’d sit besides him to catch a break and make light conversation, the deep rumble of his voice soothing all of your worries in a minute. 

As the hours went by, it was way past nightfall when you closed up, everyone else had already left and you were exhausted after washing the studio on your own. True to his word, Simon loomed behind you like a shadow, quiet and intimidating, refusing to leave until he had walked you to your car in safety. You remember thanking him profusely, and him not making a big deal out of it, and the way your heart thrummed in your throat as you drove on autopilot to your house, trying to ignore the way Ghost’s figure walking besides you on the quiet sidewalk a few moments before felt just right. 

☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆

It was early August when you woke up in a very good mood that one morning.

Later you’d realize it was because it was the day of Simon’s appointment, but at the time you had chalked it up to just being a sunny day that brightened your spirits.

Business as usual, you went along your day, anxiously waiting for the place to empty out and you’d get your newly discovered favorite customer, not that you’d admit it outloud to him, or even to yourself. It was actually a slower day, with a big break between clients, which you were glad about, so between coffee and water breaks and chit chatting with your coworkers, soon enough the sun went down and the enormous figure of Ghost could be seen crossing the threshold of the studio’s glass door, responding your enthusiastic wave with a nod of his head, eyes relaxed behind the mask. As usual, he followed you inside the procedure room, and you remembered something.

“Lemme see how your sleeve is healing.” Extending your hand, you smiled cheekily at him, giddy after seeing his half-hearted eye roll, and he gave his left forearm for you to inspect. With his busy way of life, you’d have expected to be worse, but it was actually very well taken care of. “Wow, this has healed up perfectly, good job, Simon!”

You beamed up at him, but your smile faltered once you saw his eyes widening at the praise. Oops. He grumbled something in response and you decided to save him the embarrassment, releasing his arm with a chuckle.

No matter how many times he did it, every single time Ghost took his shirt off it made your brain short circuit, but you remained professional and fell into the familiar routine of tattooing him in comfortable silence, only this time it was broken not only by you talking first, but also him. It surprised you to hear him ask you questions first or tell you some non-compromising stories about his job, - making you chuckle a few times hearing about the shenanigans of this “Soap” friend of his - but you weren’t about to complain. You were lost in the familiarity of it all when you realized that you were actually almost done with the shading - meaning his chest piece would end one session earlier than expected. Trying to mask your disappointment, you wrapped it up, forcing a smile to a suddenly very confused Ghost. 

“I thought we were going to need another session but, uh, turns out it was…faster than i expected!” You gave him a slight, nervous chuckle, and you swore you saw his eyes widen behind the mask. 

As usual, you wrapped the ink in the plastic film - finding it very hard to make the masking tape stick to his large pecs - and gave the same instructions in a robotic way, following him to the front desk where he finished paying for his piece, all in absolute silence and with unreadable eyes. As the transaction was finished, he lingered, standing silently in front of you, looming. You couldn’t meet his eyes.

“So, yeah, i guess that’s it…” You gave another chuckle, offering him a gentle smile. “Hey, don’t be a stranger-”

“Do you want to go out with me sometime?” He blurted out, shutting you right up, and that stopped you dead in your tracks. You stared up at him, unsure if you had heard him correctly, and were waiting for him to say something else or even backtrack, but that never came.

“Uh. Yes? I mean, yes, sure! I’d love to!” You stammered, certain you were wide-eyed and a flustered mess, not expecting him to be so straightforward, or, even say anything at all. Simon seemed a lot more composed than you, even if the way he blurted his question out made it seem like he could be slightly nervous. You doubted he ever got nervous, though. 

“Great. Does this weekend work for you?” 

Thinking back on your schedule, you remembered that no, it didn’t.

“I’m booked with work…But, the next one I should be free.” You hated how awkward you sounded.

He nodded, and took his phone out of his pocket to extend it for you, and you assumed he was asking for your number in the Ghost-est fashion possible. You unlocked it, noticing the lack of a password and the factory wallpaper, realizing it was probably a personal and barely used phone, punching your number in and saving the contact. As you returned the device to Simon, you found solace in realizing he probably felt as awkward as you did.

“I’ll see you in a fortnight, then.” 

With a last nod of his head, he left, leaving you flustered, confused, but extremely giddy, and with a heart pounding against your ribcage. 

☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆

Simon came back a week before he was supposed to.

As usual, you were closing up shop when he showed up, distractedly walking around the front room of the studio as you organized everything for the night, the sound of the heavy rain outside covering up the creaking of the glass door, so when you turned around, his presence startled you. 

“Hi Simon! You’re early.” You chuckled once you recovered from your scare, but he didn’t match your energy. He was just standing there, stiff as a plank, and staring silently at you. Growing increasingly worried, you were about to ask if he was alright when he beat you to it. 

“I’m leaving for a mission. And i’ll be gone for…some time.” 

Your heart dropped, and you could only stare at his mask trying to process his words and find words, but ultimately settling on a quiet and disappointed oh. He finally approached you, and in less than a second he was standing towering over your figure, holding you in that familiar eye contact you’d grown to look forward to so much, even if you'd realized by his gaze that he seemed just as upset as you. 

“Will you…be in danger?” It was a dumb question, but you couldn’t help yourself, everything you told yourself the days about moving slowly and waiting for your first date to decide how much you cared flying out the window as you openly worried for him for the first time. Ghost sighed, and suddenly you were hyper aware of how close you stood.

“I always am.” 

Not breaking away from his intoxicating gaze, your words lowered to a whisper, a plea.

“Be careful. Please.” 

The air stilled around you, thicker in tension that got worse with each passing millisecond, all of those feeling like hours. Simon’s height had never seemed so intimidating, and you never chastised yourself so much before for liking how his intense aura made you feel, something that increased tenfold once he boldly got even closer to you. Opening and closing your mouth like a fish, hoping something would come out eventually, you stilled upon feeling his gloved hands gingerly touching your face - dwarfing you in them - and you swore your heart was about to leap from your chest to your throat in a matter of seconds. His steely gaze flickered downwards briefly before returning to your eyes, asking for permission for something you didn’t even know quite right what it was, but that you’d give him regardless. The rough texture of his gloved left hand reached your now slightly parted lips as he traced the bottom of them with his thumb, moving his other hand to slowly lift up his balaclava just enough to expose his - unsurprisingly - sharp, stubbled jaw and full, lightly scarred lips. You barely had time to admire what you could see of him before his face was merely inches apart from yours, your breaths mingling together from both of your parted lips.

“You don’t even know what I look like.” He mumbled against you. A silent beg for you to stop him now, but you wouldn’t even dream of it.

“I don’t care.” You breathed back, voice barely above a whisper, and that seemed to break his resolve, as in the next moment he was leaning in and finally capturing your lips with his. 

Kissing Simon Riley in real life was so much better than what you imagined. His height made it that he had to lean down an awkward amount to reach you and you actually had to stand a bit on your toes, but none of that mattered as you finally felt his lips move against yours, surprisingly slow and gentle for a man that looked like that, but you supposed he was always full of surprises. He moved his hands from your face to your waist, gripping with a little more force when you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him closer, encouraging him to kiss you harder - it would be a waste not to feel just how strong those huge arms of his could get wrapping around you. Groaning into your mouth, his touch soon became ravenous as he tasted you like a starved man, both of you now knowing it might as well be the last time you’d see each other, but you didn’t want to dwell too much on it, choosing instead to focus on the way he gripped the back of your thighs and lifted you onto the counter as if you weighed nothing, getting even impossibly closer to your smaller frame, never breaking the kiss. You felt like you could stay wrapped up in his arms for hours, but at some point you had to part your lips, keeping your foreheads touching and looking at each other without saying another word.

He waited until you closed up and walked you to your car again; except, this time, as you watched his retreating figure from the rearview mirror, your chest felt constricted, the unsureness of if he’d ever come back alive clenching your throat in fear. 

☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆

The late june spring air smelled good, and you were in high spirits. 

You hummed contently, cleaning with a paper towel wet with soapy water the last smudges on the inked skin, leaning back to admire your work. The black crow on his upper back turned out particularly good, and you found it amusing how its edgy nature went along well with the other tattoos already on his body. Spreading the hydrating vaseline to wrap the piece up took a little more than you’d take with other clients, since you were busy admiring and feeling up the strong, scarred back beneath your fingertips. 

“All done!” 

The man got up, admiring the crow in an awkward angle in front of the full body mirror, and you couldn’t help but keep staring at the muscular back and pecs that you could see from your position in your chair.

“Quit the ogling.”

His voice sounded gruffy, but slightly amused, which made you chuckle and get up, stopping by his side to lean against his huge arms and stare back at him through the mirror.

“Quit being hot, then.”

Simon rolled his eyes, but you knew he was smiling under the mask and possibly had the slightest red dusting his cheeks - since he was so pale, you’d always notice it when he had his mask off, and in turn, he’d always notice how you’d stare at his face with a smug smile. He looked over the tattoo once more before you wrapped it up, past the stage of giving him the instructions, all of them already second nature to him, considering it had been so many years he started getting tattooed by you.

“You know” You started as he followed you to the front door of the mostly empty studio, the only other sound being the tattoo machine of a single other coworker that was staying late in their own procedure room. “You don’t have to wait for me, you know I still got another client and it should take one or two hours more.” 

Ghost huffed, turning to you with his hands on his jacket pockets, the height difference between you never failing to take all the air out of your lungs.

“Nonsense. He’s not supposed to be here for another half an hour, right? I’ll go grab us some dinner from that place you like and I’ll be right back. I’ll help you close up then we can go home.” 

You shook your head with a giggle, watching as he came closer to you, and were about to protest more but he gave you a look that left no chance for you to be stubborn, shutting you right up. Taking one hand out of his pocket, Simon lifted his mask just enough for you to see his jaw - which you had already admired that morning while he was shaving - and his lips, leaning down to plant a soft kiss on your cheek. You smiled, feeling him murmur just so you could hear it.

“See you in a minute, love.”

With that, he left, leaving you to watch fondly his retreating form from the glass door, as you chuckled dreamily one last time and went back to your procedure room.

[unknownteapot]

2 Truths 1 Lie : SMOSHBLR EDITION 

y’all ive been thinking about this one for a while lol- after the ‘smoshblr assumptions’ game was received so well i was like we haaaave to do another one- it brings the fandom so much closer and is honestly such a good way to get to know moots better <3

SO. without further ado- I present to you SMOSHBLR’s 2 Truths 1 Lie organised by yours truly with some help from kind friends @xxsuicidalravenxx & @babychosen <3 

Here’s how you play:

Rb this post with ‘#i’m in’ so i can keep track of who’s playing

Between the hours of 9:00 am EST - 12:00 (noon) EST on Wed. June 5th (check what time that would be in your area) post a 1-day poll to your blog with 3 facts about yourself (the reason it’s a specific time is so we don’t miss any/have polls end at different times and make the game an endless loop )

Self-explanatory here, 1 of the facts should be completely false and the other two should be true.

IMPORTANT: PLEASE. please. do NOT give away personal information/intimate life details that could identify you. despite how awesome smoshblr is, the internet is still a scary place.

You can tag the poll whatever you’d like but please include #smoshblrtwotruths somewhere in the tags so i can rb it ;)

After your poll is up- you now have 24h to go on the #smoshblrtwotruths tag and have fun speculating on other’s facts in the replies of their posts and

VOTE FOR THE OPTION YOU THINK THEIR 1 LIE IS!!

You can ask others questions about their facts to help verify their stories via asks or replies on their polls, but keep in mind, just like in smosh’s real game version, they could be lying ;)

Be silly, be goofy, be kind.

After the polls end (sometime on Thursday the 6th), rb your poll explaining what the truths and lies actually were so we can see if we were right!!

At the end (Friday 7th) i’ll make a masterlist of all the truths & lies so we can clearly see who the winners were <3

AWARDS:

🎩 The Lesbian Wonkas 🍭 (The Winners)- people whose lie does NOT get found by collecting the most votes on the poll- will get a personalised playlist based on the vibes their tumblr gives off straight from my chaotic ass spotify <3 

🐦‍⬛ The Birds of The Amazönê 🚬 (The Losers)- the losers will get sprayed with water a.k.a an influx of asks with nothing but 💦🔫💦🔫💦🔫💦🔫 in them (by participating in the game, you consent to this so don’t be annoyed at me. get sprayed, bestie)

okay. that’s it. please reply or send asks if the rules are unclear!! i’d suggest scheduling ur 2 Truths 1 Lie poll as soon as you have your facts so it can go up during the mentioned time with all the other polls and you don’t have to worry about posting it 🫶🏻

i’m tagging some moots so they know this is happening and just bc they’re awesome @lilac-hecox @sage-lights @japhan2024 @baflegacy @shesmore-shoebill feel free to tag your friends too <3

Let’s get truthing and lying, smoshblr!!!

[freckliedan]

@simplydnp because you were interested in the tags on my recent rb, here is what i remember of the au i came up with in my college algebra class in 2018:

in this au phil is a math professor & has been for a couple years. he's hot about this

math is a kind of language, you know? it's not that much of a stretch.

dan and phil in this au are long distance/online best friends for YEARS, never managing to end up in the same city

one of them moving to the other has always been the plan & they've visited each other/taken trips together as often as possible so they know that living together would work well

they both know there's a mutual attraction but they never were single at the same time/never in a good place to do long distance indefinitely

it has now been a Long time since they had any conversations about it, which isn't a surprise because they're still not living in the same location

dan dropped out of university, halfway through his first semester. in this universe, he decides to go back to school for something he's actually interested in. possibly queer studies?

he gets into the school phil teaches at. EXCITING! they're going to be in the same place.

since dan's going to be a non-traditional student—phil was already teaching at dan's age—the dorms would suck. finding somewhere affordable to live also sucks

phil, of course, offers for dan to move in with him. he's got a second bedroom that's currently an office

move in day is a LONG day of travel & lugging around boxes and smaller furniture dan brought with him and they're going to get dan a mattress and bedframe tomorrow but aw hell, phil's air mattress has a leak

it's a no-brainer for them to share phil's bed for the night, they've shared smaller mattresses before on trips

"for the night"

reader, they never get dan his own bed. and they never really talk about it.

lead up to the semester. time for dan to meet with his academic advisor and build a schedule.

dan's plan is to knock out general education requirements he probably won't enjoy early on, but not to have those be the majority of his schedule.

dan doesn't realize it's PHIL'S basic math class he's been put in until he gets home (to the home they share!)

by then it feels like more trouble than it's worth to reschedule with his advisor and figure out an entirely new set of classes to take—the current ones took forever to plan in the first place

it'll be fine. honestly it'll be fun to see what phil's classes are like, & easier than struggling to pay attention with somebody else and having phil help explain things anyways—

halfway through the third week of class dan realizes he's in love with phil, it's not just attraction or a crush, it's been almost a fucking decade, oh my god

and the deadline to drop a class was last week.

phil already knows he's in love with dan. but phil has a strong commitment to ethics. there is a 0% chance he's going to do anything about it while dan's in his class

they go home to their shared home where they have a shared bed. dan almost broaches the conversation.

please can we not talk about it, asks phil. it will be easier for me if we don't talk about it until we can— it'll be easier for me if we don't talk about it yet. that'll make it more real.

roll a semester long slow burn where they're already being extremely domestic and both know they have mutual feelings. there's so much room for further tropes & exploration of existing ones here

there's room for self worth struggles surfacing on dan's part and moral anxiety/anxiety issues on phi'ls part especially with them intentionally not talking about it.

oh noo they have a bad week and dan has a breakdown & almost goes to actually buy a bed setup for himself. etc. quite honestly i didn't get this far i just like putting people in fucking predicaments

of course they fuck nasty once final grades are submitted. merry christmas

i think they go straight from best friends to engaged

dan did actually learn math well from phil but he's never taking another phil class in his life thankyou very much

this au is partially born out of me being inherently contrarian to MYSELF even. i'm generally squicked badly by teacher/student aus on account of Both My Parents Are Teachers so it was a fun exercise in figuring out one that didn't make my skin crawl. aaaand scene.

i'm never going to write this so if anybody who does write finds something they like in it. feel free to run with that just @ me if you post something. i'm freckliedan on ao3 as well

[sp-high-au]

OOC Info Yapping😔

Hey! Welcome to my little shitstorm of an au! Obviously I’m gonna talk about it for a little bit because I never learn when to stfu and I feel like there’s a couple of things that I need to bring up to tie the whole thing together.

So this layout is kinda new to me. Technically is a roleplay but also at the same time there’s not gonna be any interaction with other rp blogs. Y’all are more than welcome to rb for your own roleplays though. There’ll be plenty of random shitposts that can be taken out of context.

This blog is being made to mimic an old school website. Y’know the ones where there’s an interactive wall for the students to post on? Yeah that. The post on this blog are going to be a mix of three things (technically four but I don’t think my ooc/admin posts really count).

ANNOUNCEMENT POSTS: Announcement posts are going to be used in place of actual posts for a site admin. Most of the time they’re going to be for lore drops that aren’t really relevant but are kinda fun to put into the storyline. For example: a background character or a character who isn’t that relevant to the story arcs birthday.

WALL POSTS: These wall posts are supposed to be posted “by students.” Once again they’re going to be used to drop more lore crumbs because high schoolers gossip a ridiculous amount and I think it’s funny.

FIC POSTS: The final type of posts are going to be fic posts! These will be link drops to my ao3. The fics will contain the main lore/arcs. They’ll also be reblogged to my main.

This story has odd publishing schedule to say the least. There are twenty-two story arcs. The storyline itself starts September 2nd 2024 and ends June 18th 2026. Each story is also planned to be posted on an accurate date, like in real time.

One arc is equal to one month. For example Arc 1: Intro to The Losers Club, takes place throughout September. The first official fic is going to be labeled like this on any master list: 1.1: (INSERT TITLE HERE). These works will either be oneshots or multi chapters. Any multi chapter will be split into “parts” like if a multi chapter is four chapters in total and there’s only two chapter total it’ll be labeled simply like this: 2/4.

Also there are some darker themes in these stories! Firstly, it’s high school. What high schooler doesn’t have issues? Secondly, it’s South Park and that itself is pretty self explanatory. And finally, I’m fucking delusional and think it’s funny.

Speaking of me though, HI!!! If you’re a mutual on my main who’s stumbled upon this mess, yes it’s Clouded. If you don’t know know who I am you can find me at my main: @justyourtypicalwriter where I am much more active and my posts are very much unplanned, unlike this blog. It’s become a favorite project of mine in the short time I’ve been working on it though and I hope you grow to enjoy it as much as I do!

Here’s one of my many, many picrews of myself that I normally use as pfps because I have a problem and that was a lot of writing💀

BUT I’M STILL YAPPING BECAUSE YOU MAY BE ASKING:

“Oh Clouded what are the ships in this au?”

And to my rare pair lovers I say:

“You’re eatin’ good tonight bbg😘”

Because as much as a Style girlie I am, there are SO MANY absolutely amazing rare pairs that get such little recognition. I know how excited I get when I see a rare pair in a popular fic or comic so there’s some food for my fellow rare pair lovers.

SHIPS:

K2

Staig

Weidi

Tyde

Dip

Rebstella

Gregstophe

Jimmy/Nichole (what’s their ship name y’all)

There’s probably more but I can’t think of any lmao-

HAPPY READING!!!

[gaybananabread]

☾༺Just a Bit Longer༻☽

~So I’ve been brainrotting over RW&RB for a solid month now. The goblins need a walk, and I cannot productivity until they get one. I love these two’s dynamic; they’re just so silly. Not my best work, but writer’s block be damned; I needed to post something this week. This is completely self-indulgent, but if it’s your thing, I hope you Enjoy!~

Lee: Alex

Ler: Henry

Summary: Alex is overworking himself, going late into the night and working hours without breaks. Sick of his lover’s dreadful work-life management, Henry takes it upon himself to get Alex to sleep.

Warnings: mild Red, White & Royal Blue spoilers! This is a tickle fic, so if you don’t like that, scroll away!!

Life for Alex Claremont-Diaz was the best it had ever been. Henry came over almost daily from his Brownstone, and he finally felt like he had a definite idea of where his life was headed. The only downside: he was still in school.

The NYU Law course was a bit more rigorous than he’d expected, but it was definitely what he wanted. Sure, that meant long, painful hours of reviewing for extremely difficult exams, discovering that tort is a real word, and trying to figure out a system for coursework that didn’t make his brain want to explode.

His sleep schedule was already shit, so he didn’t think any of it would be a problem. If he just pulled a few all-nighters and pumped out some late-night essays, he’d be fine. What he didn’t think about, however, was how Henry would take it.

Alex was working late on another essay, running off of coffee and pure determination. He hadn’t meant to put it off, but with the three exams he’d had that week, his mind was a scattered mess.

Henry had put up with it for most of the night, but as two AM rolled around, his understanding had run dry, replaced by concern.

Knocking the “shave and a haircut�� pattern on his lover’s door, Henry entered the room. He was immediately greeted with the strong smell of coffee and desperation.

There sat his boyfriend, hunched over a computer with a half-eaten ham sandwich (he couldn’t handle turkey anymore) by his side. The blonde couldn’t help the sad sigh that escaped him.

Alex looked up, his glasses nearly all the way down on his nose. It was unfairly cute, though Henry shoved that feeling down for the moment.

“Uh…hey, Hen. Not done yet; gimme, like, another half-hour.” Alex’s gaze was back on his computer in seconds.

Henry rubbed his temples, already feeling a headache brew. For once, why couldn’t Alex just use common sense?

“Alex, darling. It’s two in the morning. You need to sleep.”

Alex scoffed, not stopping for even a second. “Says you. You stay up later than I do most of the time.” While that wasn’t untrue, Henry’s problems were because of insomnia. Alex was just a stubborn asshole.

“Look, I’m going to be brutally honest here. You look terrible, you seem exhausted, and the bags under your eyes could fit the entirety of the Royal Wardrobe. Go. To. Sleep.”

Henry laid things out bluntly, crossing his arms. It was meant to leave little room for negotiation, but defying Henry’s expectations was Alex’s special talent.

“This is due at eight AM…uh, today. I’ve only got six hours to finish this thing, but I’m almost done. I promise, just a bit longer.” This would have been more comforting if Alex hadn’t already said that three times.

“Alex, please. If you sleep now, I’ll wake you up at six, and we’ll work on it together. It hurts to see you like this, dear.” He used pet names, trying to sway Alex to listen. It was a last-ditch effort; if he still refused, Henry didn’t have much of a plan left. Sure enough, he did.

“It’s fine, Henry. I’m all good, just a little spacy. I promise, the moment I’m done, I’ll eat your face. Okay, baby?” Alex flipped the other man’s strategy back on him, hoping to fully bury the concern. He was fine: end of story.

For Henry, though, the tale was just beginning. He racked his brain, searching for anything to help him get Alex to cooperate. He could only remember one time anyone was successful.

Alex had invited him to the White House for June’s birthday party. As the night dragged on, everyone but Alex was drunk and exhausted. To tire him out, June had employed some rather…unconventional methods.

Methods that would be extremely useful to him at that moment.

Casually approaching his boyfriend, Henry put a hand on the laptop. Then, after making sure the work was saved, he closed it. He pointedly ignored Alex’s scoff and protests, grabbing his chin and pulling him in for a kiss. Alex still squirmed, though a smile was breaking out on his face.

That was all Henry needed to continue. He gripped Alex under his thighs, lifting the man up and plopping him down on his nearby bed.

A surprised sound left him, his cheeks gaining a nearly imperceptible red hue. He was expecting some push-back from Henry, but nothing this active.

“Just couldn’t wait for me, could you~?” Alex weteased, starting to sit up on the bed. Henry was quick to stop that, grabbing Alex’s arms and pinning them above his head.

Before his lover could make another joke, Henry tapped a few fingers on his side. That shut him up, if only for a second.

“Henry, I swear to fucking god, if you try anything-” He was cut off when Henry squeezed his side, resulting in an indignant squeak.

“Sorry, dear, but I’m afraid I already have~” With that, Henry clawed his fingers into Alex’s stomach, straddling him.

The tired man tried to bite his lip, but the coffee wasn’t quite enough to give him that energy. A few giggles slipped out, quickly followed by tiny curses.

“What’s the matter, Alex? Something bothering you?” Henry chuckled, leaning down further to try and hold him still.

Kicking and squirming, Alex tried anything to get away from the evil fingers. He was tired, though; his brain was moving at half-speed and felt like it was running through soup.

“Gehehet ohoff me, youhuhu prihick!” Henry has decided to move up to his ribs, scritching and scratching between each bone.

Even on a good day, it’d be hard for Alex to get out from under him. With no sleep, coffee fumes and pure spite, he had no chance.

“Why on Earth would I do that? I’m quite comfortable here. Besides, you seem to be enjoying yourself, if that blush is any indication,” Henry taunted, jutting his chin out. He didn’t really need to, but it was a sure-fire way to rile Alex.

“Fuhuhuck off! Hehenry, I swehehear- quihit!” Alex tried to bury his face in his shoulder, though he only drew attention to a new target. Henry leaned down, blowing a raspberry on his boyfriend’s neck. Alex would rather die than repeat the squeal that left him.

“Wow, Alex. Perhaps the Barbara Streisand accusation wasn't so far off,” he teased, his voice about as smug than Alex had ever heard it.

The typically witty man was in giggly shambles, trying his best not to sound like a child. He wasn’t very successful.

“SHUHUhut uhup, youhu douche!!” Laughing like a toddler, Alex was still pumping out insults. Henry was about to put a stop to that. Going for the kill, he hooked his thumbs into Alex's hip divots, kneading and squeezing the area.

That seemed to work quite well.

“GAH- HEHENRY! You- YAHAHA! FAHAHACK!” The law student lost his shit, practically cackling under his boyfriend.

Alex arched his back off the bed, only bucking into the ticklish feeling. There was no room in his mind for witt; the best he could do was “fuck fuck fuck it tickles oh my god-”

Hearts practically formed in Henry’s eyes at the adorably hysteric reaction. Still, as cute as it was, he had a mission.

“This all ends the moment you agree to rest. Or…would you like me to continue? I bet I could just tickle you senseless all night. You’d surely be exhausted then, wouldn’t you?”

Alex couldn’t even get a word out, shaking his head as he laughed. His curls went wild, getting in his eyes and puffing up. Henry wanted to brush it from his eyes, but he had to keep his priorities in order. There would be time for fawning over him later.

“HEHENRY! PLEHE- snrk” It took a solid minute, but Alex’s resolve was weakening. He was already tired beforehand, and laughing his ass off wasn’t helping. The squirming had died down almost completely, snorts slipping into the lax cackles.

While it wasn’t an agreement, the Prince could tell that his lover would be out in seconds. Henry stopped, switching to gentle traces down his sides. The first son tried to calm down, a steady stream of giggles pouring from his lips.

“H-hoholy shihihit… Thahat was evil.” He tried taking some deep breaths, rubbing his cheeks. Alex hadn’t laughed that hard in a while. He was close to just passing out right there, pure exhaustion hitting him like a freight train.

“Possibly. You deserved it, though.” Henry leaned down, gently kissing his curved lips. This sight was one of his new favorites: Alex, his toned skin flushed, practically a puddle of giggles beneath him.

Alex flipped him the bird before melting into the kiss. He weakly pulled his boyfriend down, snuggling against him. He’d all but forgotten about his essay, eyes closed the moment he laid still; the poor guy was wiped. It wasn’t terrible by any means, but all his energy was gone.

Carefully grabbing his phone, Henry set an alarm for six AM.

They’d finish that research paper; he was certain of that. With a bit of sleep, Alex would be a writing machine. True, the slightly rushed grammar would be atrocious, but that’s what Henry was there for. Pulling the sheets up over them both, Henry breathed a happy sigh.

“Good night, love.”

[kishibei]

APPOINTMENT WITH THE LOVE DOCTOR !

a matchup event by newly (un) licensed dr. dzifa!

DOCTOR'S NOTE: i've literally been sooo on and off on this account and u guys still fw me?! thank you sm for all the love you've shown me! thank you for 1k but i've decided to quit tumblr and become a self proclaimed love doctor.

SCHEDULE AN APPOINTMENT WITH THE LOVE DOCTOR!check the status of this post to ensure the doctor is taking appointments at the time of your request!

STATUS: CLOSED!!! (mutuals can send for a squeeze in!)

YOU: you're joking, right... you don't even got a license !!!

DR. DZI: there's no time for that! we'll need to do a little questionnaire and update some information i have on file!

FOR — RES EVIL/JJK/AOT/BLLK/BLEACH/GENSHIN/HQ

THE SAMPLE : send me an ask describing yourself: tell me about your personality, hobbies, likes/dislikes, pronouns + anything else. you can also describe your appearance or attach an image (only if u want an appearance matchup !!!)

please specify which fandom you want a matchup from and if you have any gender preferences for your match.

if you do chose to attach a photo of yourself, it will not be posted !!! i will make a separate post and tag you in it !

YOUR PRESCRIPTION (500mg):

after our consultation (your ask !) you will recieve:

DEAR PATIENT (FOLLOWING) —

a character i think you'd look good with, a brief description of your relationship, a few images to fit you two, and a song that encompasses your relationship or the vibe of it !

FREQUENT VISITORS (MUTUALS) —

all as listed above with a mini scenario added on !

this is a follower only event, if you plan to participate please make sure that you are following me before scheduling !!!

pls do not send me an ask after i close submissions! it will not get answered !!!

THANK YOU FOR PARTICIPATING, RBS APPRECIATED <3

[ivy-meshle]

Okay I said on Tuesday in the tags I might talk about plurality n stuff wrt myself. Right now this is more stream of consciousness than anything polished, and idk if I’m going to be up to talking about it with people for a few days.

This is gonna get pretty long so I'm putting it under the cut:

(FWIW, I'm mainly using 'I' here, but that's because I've spent so long trying to make sure I keep plurality stuff off of this blog it feels weird to write 'we').

I think it was... fuck, six or seven years ago now? that I first learned what plurality even was, then another year and a half where I just kept thinking about it for weeks on end before I started to maybe consider that the reason I couldn't stop thinking about it was maybe the same reason I couldn't stop thinking about transness after I'd learned about that.

Even now, I'm still hesitant to claim plurality. It feels like a step too far- like I’m overstating things. I don't feel like one person, but I don't know that I feel like more than one, either. Certainly I don't have clear boundaries between one self and another. It’s more akin to distinct patterns of thoughts and behaviors that I feel like I snap between. Neural pathways that open and close.

There is one consistent pattern I've noticed though: when I'm in a period of stress, those distinctions become a lot clearer, and they tend to stay clearer than they were before even after I can unwind. Which is part of why I'm feeling more comfortable talking about plurality now; I know I'm going to be more people, more clearly, in the next four years.

The other major reason is that I want to not feel doubt every time I talk about us, that I'm just deluding myself. And that means that I need to get more used to talking about us.

So, uh, introductions, I guess? I've opted not to introduce characters (fictives(?)), since they tend to come and go more frequently- usually as I write about them. I think it's something about trying to get into their perspective that creates some of the same sort of neural pathways. If they stick around for longer than three months after I stop writing about them, I'll introduce them then. The sole exception here is Nensa, who meets that requirement.

For now: Hunter, 'me', host(?). He/it. Mostly responsible for getting people and things to where they need to be to work. Emotional regulation and planning type things.

Asher. He/ey. Math/physics nerd, problem solver. He handles the homework :Þ

Nensa. They/she. Minecraft Warden hybrid, stoic, helps with handling sensory overload mainly.

Miranda. She/her. Customer service voice social butterfly. When I need to talk to people at the bank or on the phone, she’s the one who takes the wheel.

Blake. He/him. Punk aesthetics and paranoia. He’s the one who keeps us from doxxing myself every other day, but also he keeps us from opening up to people. It’s a balancing act. (He’s very resistant to posting this.)

Dakota. She/her. Probably the first distinct self I identified; basically the face of my RSD. Very sensitive, cries frequently.

Ulyssa. She/it/void. Goth and angry and rude. It formed semi-on-purpose when Hunter decided to treat the negative self talk while I was spiraling like it was a person he could talk to and well. Now she is! Hunter tries to keep it and Dakota separate as much as possible.

Qwerty. It/she/he. Online persona, kinda? It only shows up when we’re on the internet. He’s more in tune with the social norms of the web than the rest of us are.

Anyways. Yeah. IDK. Life is weird and brains are weirder and I don’t necessarily think of myself as a system, but I would count myself as plural. That’s about the long and short of it.

Feels like I ought to say more, but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I’m going to schedule this for, like, 9am my time so that I don’t have to actually hit that post button myself (scary). I also probably won’t be up for talking about this with other people (sorry mutuals!) for at least a few days. Thanks for listening.

( @ivy-meshle so I can rb this in the future )

[oswlld]

oswlld's monthly wrap up: march

note: i am trying something a bit different this year, so bear with me as i figure out how i want to format this. i wanted to spend more time sharing what i consume, beyond what i rb, and put my thoughts in one place. these posts are okay to rb

--

When We Cease to Understand the World, Benjamín Labatut [started 02/24, finished 03/14] What an outstanding example of blurring the lines between fiction and reality. I am content in never knowing what’s real and imaginary in the lives of these people. May we never forget that for every new idea challenged, there is a real person with real emotions and motivations behind it. 4.25⭐️ in storygraph. — No Stopping Us Now: A History of Older Women in America, Gail Collins [started 03/03, finished 03/30] This book makes some strong points, but comes off weak in its execution. By having it be told decade by decade, it becomes hard to follow along when so many names and events are being tossed around. Without a firm thread tying all the themes together, the achievements ended up feeling lackluster when it should leave you feeling a sense of pride and hopefulness. 3.25⭐️ in storygraph (I rounded up, but it feels more like a 3.15)

23.5 Degrees, GMMTV [started: 03/08, ongoing] What a breath of fresh air!! With my busy schedule, I managed to catch the first two eps and I’ve loved every minute of it. It doesn’t take itself too seriously, while still keeping a tight grip on its sense of identity. The series soaks up every aspect of its space theme like a sponge. Content specifically made for me, tysm! As much as I have tried refraining from consuming more high school settings, I couldn’t help but be enamored by what I have seen so far. I have paused this series for now, but hopefully I’ll be caught up before the end of April. I should be able to watch it live on Fridays in May. Until then, I will miss them dearly! — Always a Witch, Netflix [started 03/28, in progress] At this time, I have only seen episodes 1-5. So far, it’s a very straight-forward series. I am restraining myself from calling it predictable, because there are one or two things that really turns some tropes/themes on its head. But all-in-all, I am still waiting for this show to grab me. For a show that checks all the boxes that really makes a core jessi show, a series with time travel, magical realism, and found family, it has yet to completely sweep me away. Time really got away from me this month, but I will finish this series sometime in the next two weeks. We shall see if the latter half gets better.

Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour (Taylor’s Version) [watched 03/15 thru 03/18] I have seen this live and did see the original film in theaters last year, so this experience was more of a rewatch. This time around, my parents wanted to watch some of it with me so we made a whole evening of it on 3/15 so that was really neat. I will be traveling a lot in April and will be taking an audio copy of this to keep me entertained. — Oscar Nomination Season [started 02/17, ended 03/24] All of my initial reactions of what I managed to cover this Oscar season is in this post. Some of the strongest categories I have had the pleasure of covering this year were the Best Documentary (feature), Best Production Design, Best Live Action Short, Best Documentary (short), and Best Animated Film. I have several more films to tackle later this year, but my overall impression this Oscar season was just alright. One or two films have hit an extremely high note for me, but no worst of the worst.

BEYONCÉ, Beyoncé [relistening] During the pandemic, I really got into waching YT reaction channels reacting to full albums. One of my favorites is HTHaze and he is only beginning his listening journey through Beyoncé’s discography (yes, for the first time!) His reaction to Beyoncé’s self-titled made me want to relisten to it in full for the first time in years. I tend to only revisit a few songs through the years, but I do love going back to albums after time has past to recontextualize everything all over again. I’ve had my longtime faves from my 20’s but in my mid-30’s, the songs that hit harder now are: Pretty Hurts, Haunted, and Jealous. — Bewitched, Laufey [first time listening] The same YT channel got me to listen to this album. I am guilty in having my first listen be through his video first before diving into her album properly. With that said, the brain rot went FULL ROT. I love LOVE her compositions. Having learned from her Tiny Desk that getting a grand piano influenced the way she wrote her songs makes the whole conception so much grander. Her voice is soooo, it’s SOOOOO !!!!!!! I read a comment somewhere that her dream is to rejuvenate jazz the same way Taylor Swift did with country for a younger generation and that really spoke to me. I truly believe she is heading in the right direction in achieving that. My favorite run of songs goes from: Haunted, Must Be Love, While You Were Sleeping, Lovesick, California and Me, Nocturne (Interlude), and Promise. Those seven songs in that succession is so GOOD, ahH! — Once the Musical [relistening] Every spring, I fall into a Once spiral and it just gets deeper and deeper. This time though, I only tackled the core faves on YT rather than committing to the full audio (w/ Arthur Darvill and Joanna Christie). Although Arthur Darvill’s Leave will forever solidify his Guy as my Guy, Declan Bennett is The Guy of Guys for me. My mandatory relistening experience always goes: Arthur’s Leave, Arthur’s Say It To Me Now, Declan’s Say It To Me Now, Declan’s When Your Mind’s Made Up, Zrinka's If You Want Me, Once’s Spotify Jam Session. And it would all be on a loop lol. — Cowboy Carter, Beyoncé [first time listening] This is still fresh in my mind, having only listened to it in its entirety once through. My first impression is that it’s one of her most cohesive albums to date. Having had the first taste of what she would eventually achieve all the way back with Lemonade and The Gift, Cowboy Carter feels like a natural progression in her discography. I don’t have a top songs list to provide at this time, as I would need more time with the album. Fav songs come with time. Although, I did listen to 16 CARRIAGES when it was released several weeks ago and I knew then it would be a spectacular album. What a phenomenal single to lead a phenomenal homecoming.

Where’d You Go Bernadette, written by Maria Semple and narrated by Kathleen Wilhoite [started 03/22, finished 03/29] I… I didn’t like this. And that’s alright. Even if I didn’t like the premise or the characters, I did enjoy the format of the narrative and the narrator (especially her singing!!). But in the end, this was just not meant for me.

—

As it is still March when I am writing this, I wanted to endcap Women’s Month with a special shoutout to two women in my life that have been working with me to improve my overall well-being: Wendy (personal trainer) and Sofia (life coach). I am in a better headspace because of the work and trust they have in me to build a life I want. I cannot wait to see what I am capable of this time next year.

[dontlookheswatching]

[INACTIVE]

Info!(≡^∇^≡)

(Note: I LOVE reblogs!!!!)

Hello hiiii I've been inactive for MONTHS, I kinda forgot I had a blog that's 'under construction' and I decided to add a info page about myself for now until I start posting doodles and such. I've been apart of the creepypasta fandom ever since the early 2000's, when it was first starting out and becoming popular, and I've decided to ACTUALLY become apart of it, as someone people may hopefully know and recognize me for by my art contributing to the community. I also have tags to help people move around my blog easier because I tend to reblog a lot. #gaymer art is any art I draw. #Gaymer ramble is when im talking about something. #Gaymer reply is when im replying to an ask. And lastly, #rb just stands for something I've reblogged. #gaymer writings mean something I've written, such as a short story. This blog will have quite gruesome/explicit themes at times. It's Creepypasta after all. I will mention things quite frequently like abuse, sex, and drug use. I will probably have art and posts that may hint at sexual themes/NSFW, but I will say I will not be posting actual NSFW art or writing on this blog. The most you might see in my art are hickeys an a characters neck or suggestive hand placement, nothing much more than that. My writing or other posts that aren't art may be more detailed about it, but again, I will not full on write the actual sex scene itself, only what would possibly lead up to it and afterwards. In a basic summary, if any of this makes you uncomfortable, I will be making a tag on my blog for this kind of stuff, you can block the tag or me in general, for your own comfort. I don't mind. I'd rather everyone be comfortable and sure of what they're looking at and expecting when scrolling through my blog or finding my things. I want to clarify even though these themes will be mentioned on my blog such as abuse or rape, I DO NOT support any of this, as a victim of a few of these things myself. Here's a list of things that will be mentioned or shown in art on my blog: -Abuse(Mental, physical, verbal, and child abuse) -Sexual assult/Rape -Sex -Drug use(Weed included in this category) -Self harm/Suicide -Violence -And possible extreme gore ---

-I am always open to dms, and I can also be contacted via discord!

-You can call me Max, friends can call me Ben, and I go by he/him. I don't mind other nicknames as long as they aren't insults ^^

-My requests and ask box will most likely be open 24/7, but as said in my bio, I'm a slow poster and It might be months in-between updates, maybe weeks if I have time, it usually depends on my schedule. I don't typically do writing prompts or anything like that, but there might be a few exceptions in the future -My main interests will not be fully discussed and addressed most of the time due to this being a Creepypasta blog but don't be shocked if you hear a reference, quote, or straight up topic about the following; •The Walking Dead •Wings of Fire •Spongebob(yes I still watch SpongeBob and I'll say it proudly ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹) •Stardew Valley •Music •Movies/Shows •The Legend of Zelda (I'm a huge geek so don't ask about it unless your fine with a REALLY LONG post-😅) •I have terrible memory so I have no idea what else to add so expect the unexpected I guess🤷

-If not already obvious, this blog will MOSTLY be Creepypasta, but don't be shocked to find something different😋

-Please dni if you; are transphobic/homophobic, disrespectful to ships that aren't popular, engage in politics, easily triggered by the themes that will be used in my blog(Drug/alcohol and sexual themes. I want you all to be safe and I don't want to cause anyone hard times with my blog) or rude in general. I want my blog to have a safe vibe where people can find enjoyment and comfort rather than aggression and forced opinions

-A few of my ships that might have you apply to my dni include Jeff and Ben (they're both adults in my au and hc's, please refrain from pushing your opinions and hc's onto me for this, thank you) and Liu and EJ. These will perhaps be the two main ones on this blog, but I have several others as well. I am a multishipper, and therefore fully support and like other ships, such as Toby and E.J, and it may be possible to find such art consisting of different ships throughout my blog. Again, please dni if you are against any of this.

If you have any questions about my blog or for me, don't be afraid to ask! Have a safe and wonderful day/night and take care, your all loved and appreciated by someone no matter what!❤️❤️❤️

[jkgnggj]

hii welcome to my little twin stars / kiki and lala themed blog! my pfp is a zoomed in poff bear of a drawing i commissioned my friend @aoki553 i like to combine my love for little twin stars with my other interests, in this case tori (⁠*⁠˘⁠︶⁠˘⁠*⁠)⁠.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡

i post / rb any toritsuka reita content I can get my hands on (⁠人⁠ ⁠•͈⁠ᴗ⁠•͈⁠) i try posting daily (for now) feel free to msg me or ask me anything! i take drawing reqs and ff prompt suggestions! im always looking for new friends and other tori enjoyers <333

˳⁺⁎˚꒰ఎ about me ໒꒱˚⁎⁺˳

my name is ruby but you can call me ruchan ♡ im currently 20 my pronouns are she/her i speak spanish and english and im an artist, writer, cosplayer, roleplayer, and the number one toritsuka reita enjoyer (self proclaimed) xp

i like fairy kei fashion, pastels, unicorns, cats, musicals, sanrio esp kiki and lala / little twin stars ☆

i enjoy watching slice of life, sports animes, and anything involving delinquent / yakuza characters, the fictional character im currently obsessed with and have dedicate this blog to is my baby boy ꒰⁠⑅⁠ᵕ⁠༚⁠ᵕ⁠꒱⁠˖⁠♡ toritsuka reita from saiki k ♡⁠˖⁠꒰⁠ᵕ⁠༚⁠ᵕ⁠⑅⁠꒱

˳⁺⁎˚ ꒰ఎ tags ໒꒱ ˚⁎⁺˳

#mikorei monday

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ every monday i try posting / reblogging mikoto aiura x reita toritsuka related posts (art, hcs, coms, ffs, etc.)

#torikechi tuesday

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ every tuesday i try posting / reblogging touma akechi x reita toritsuka related posts (art, hcs, coms, ffs, etc.)

#yumetori wednesday

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ every wednesday i try posting / reblogging chiyo yumehara x reita toritsuka related posts (art, hcs, coms, ffs, etc.)

#torisai thursday

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ every thursday i try posting / reblogging kusuo saiki x reita toritsuka related posts (art, hcs, coms, ffs, etc.)

#satori saturday

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ every saturday i try posting / reblogging hiroshi satou x reita toritsuka related posts (art, hcs, coms, ffs, etc.)

#ruchan writes

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ tag i use for when i post / promote my fics (my ao3 acc is the same as this one, as well as my twt, insta, discord in case anyone wants to talk thru those platforms instead)

#ruchans art

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ tag i use when i post my art, whether it be my half of an art trade, a gift for a friend or just a drawing i thought id share with everyone <3 i only do traditional art as of now

#ruchan rambles

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ tag i use for mainly text posts of me rambling about my hcs or aus

#commission

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ tag i use for keeping track of all the amazing drawings ive commissioned (im the number one lu-kario fan btw (also self proclaimed))

#art trade

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ tag i use for keeping track of all my wonderful art trades with friends and mutuals :> i try tagging their tumblr or instagram so anyone can follow if theyd like <3

˳⁺⁎˚ ꒰ఎ misc ໒꒱ ˚⁎⁺˳

ofc I cant promise ill be able to post every single day or that ill post stuff thats specific for the theme / tag of the day, sometimes ill post torisai stuff on a monday if i really feel like it (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧ and theres gonna be times i wont be able to post or run out of stuff to post but ill do my best to stick to this schedule ive set! ʕ⁠ ⁠•⁠ᴥ⁠•⁠ʔ⁠ᕤ☆ also if u have any suggestions for what the theme for fridays and sundays should be then pls lmk! I'm thinking psychickers sunday and art trade fridays? name still pending...

anyways i hope u enjoy ur visit, baii ~ ♡⁠(⁠˃͈⁠ ⁠દ⁠ ⁠˂͈⁠ ⁠༶⁠ ⁠)

[darkcandy-starfait]

Hey! I'll have a dark candy starfait!

Moved from my original blog @angel-starfait-movedtonewblog . No idea how cards work, so until I do you get this.

• luma

• they/them

• 22

• hypertixates and reblogs art, plus occasional art and discussions/theories

• my main blog is @starrrbitz

• my art blog is @stardecahedron

I mainly reblog utdr stuff, usually kfc and fun gang content and also occasionally post art and theories/discussions. I run this blog also under safeutdr rules. Info about it here.

Tags and DNI under the cut vv

The main tags I use

#rambles (for text and rants)

#rb

#my art

#update (changes or additions to the blog)

#its only queue (scheduled posts)

#tw (trigger warnings + insert tag, eg. blood, gore, ed, etc.)

#safeutdr

#undertale

#deltarune

#discussion

#theory

#deltarune spoilers

#cool art (art that's not mine)

#friends art (my dear besties art)

#old rb (reblogs from old/inactive blogs)

#old art

These next tags are for nsfw content, again this blog will always be mostly sfw, but I might occasionally reblog jokes.

#suggestive

#nsfw

Before you interact...

💫 the following results in an immediate block:

- spam bots, porn bots, empty blogs (just put a pfp and a short bio to show you're not a bot lol)

- MAP/PEAR

- proship

- romanticizating incest, pedophilia, abuse, rape

- anti queer/LGBT

- TERF/radfem, transmed/gendercritical

- racist/colourist

- sexist

- fat phobic/pro ED/thinspo

- ableist

❤ utdr DNI:

- nazi

ships

- frans, fontcest, mettaton x napstablook, etc (pretty self explanatory)

- any ships between these characters (all of them are siblings, adoptive siblings still count): chara, asriel, frisk, kris, ralsei

- undyrus

- sanscest

aus & blogs

- sans centric aus, glitchtale, caretaker of the ruins (nochocolate), handplates

- aus involving misgendering of trans/enby characters

- infantilization/demonization of neurodivergent characters, eg. babying papyrus, demonizing alphys

- general head ass takes, eg. Toriel is homophobic, Chara abused Asriel, etc...

any arguments hurled at me, or into my ask box, or in the notes of my posts will be ignored and result in an immediate block!!

[vampvelvet]

I posted 12,921 times in 2022

That's 7,439 more posts than 2021!

608 posts created (5%)

12,313 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@wizardpotions

@clumpofglitter

@niceferatu

@lake-lady

@officialbogwitch

I tagged 975 of my posts in 2022

#community nbc - 41 posts

#save - 37 posts

#nonbinary - 33 posts

#mlp - 22 posts

#dont rb - 22 posts

#arfid - 21 posts

#lgbt - 20 posts

#art - 19 posts

#nephs art - 19 posts

#nephs ocs - 18 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#this is so presumptuous about the reader like yeah i am working towards a better life and a better self. establish that this isnt universal

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

PSA on second hand shopping

more people need to shop at thrift stores, rummage sales, estate sales, consignment, flea markets, and the like. I don't care if you can afford new stuff, if you think it's dirty, if you don't feel like spending the time sifting through things you don't want. fast fashion and other quick moving industries are killing us.

so many thrift shops are begging people to buy more, and they have to stop taking donations for a while. a lot of rummage sale sellers will throw out what they don't sell by the end of the weekend, and they can negotiate and give you deals..

even if you don't want clothes, chances are you will find something you needed anyways, or find something you didn't know you needed. I promise you can find time in your hurried schedule to make a weekend out of rummage saling, and it's so much more fun then taking a minute to add a new shirt to your cart on amazon.

and while you're at it, set up a rummage sale of your own if you can, even in favor of listing it online. there's people in your community who will take a weekend to check it out, and those people are often in need of cheaper options for things like clothes, shoes, kitchenware, etc.

and please for the love of god if am item is still in working condition, use it as long as possible, or give it/sell it away if you must. do not throw away perfectly good items.

buying second hand saves the earth

134 notes - Posted May 2, 2022

#4

See the full post

135 notes - Posted April 4, 2022

#3

the greendale 7 deadly sins

I did these based on the characters' weak points if u know what I mean?

britta- pride

- she is confident in herself without reason. at the beginning of the show, she seems confident and smart. Later, we find out about her failed activism, her inability to back up her statements, and her shaky relationship with her parents. Not to mention the whole therapist situation.

troy- envy

- it's discussed in the show that troy and abed spend too much time together. they've mentioned how much his identity was tied to abed. he wanted to be like abed, spend a lot of time with him, live with him. he wanted abed to know he was out there somewhere and look for him! he had envy knowing that if he met abed, he would have been so much different in his high school years.

abed- gluttony

- not in the sense that most media portrays gluttony, but it's also depicted as lack of self restraint. Abed often has to learn when he's going too far such as hiring celebrity lookalikes. Frankie ends up teaching him to rely on things other than TV, like he did in the past.

jeff- sloth

- this one is self explanatory I think. Jeff does everything he can to do less work both as a student and as a teacher, even as a friend. he would only break into a light jog!

annie- lust

- as much as I hate to say it, annie did spend a lot of the time wanting a relationship with Jeff. though even even admitted it wasn't even jeff that she wanted, I was just the idea of love. but even at times when she isn't going after Jeff, she's thinking about romance in the future, like her missing lover tapes. she's very anxious about her future in this sense.

shirley- wrath

- shirley has an entire backstorys worth of anger issues. she started as stabbing kids with Foosball sticks, to trashing slaters office in the name of Jeff. now, she takes out her anger on more organized matters such as any of the schoolwide games, or various heists the group does. she definelty expresses her wrath healthier than she did in the past, but it's still very intense compared to her usual self

pierce- greed

- he wants everything. he wanted the handshake, he wanted Shirley's sandwiches, and most of all he wanted constant inclusion. But none of it was things he deserved, given how he treated his friends. And if he didn't get it, he forced his way into it (with money usually)

feel free to add on your opinions :)

159 notes - Posted March 31, 2022

#2

active member of the adhd symptom fandom

227 notes - Posted February 12, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

hc that every human character matt berry has played is just lazlo pretending to be human. the grifting professor in community? that's just lazlo having a grand old time!

974 notes - Posted September 5, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[whipped-for-fictionals]

❝ i was enchanted to meet you . . . ❞

diavolo picture by @/savemebeel | pfp by @zombiesandbells , it's fanart of my crossover ship diayoi! (diavolo obey me x yoimiya genshin) | banner found on gyfcat

— NESSA . 18 . genderfluid + bisexual . capricorn . esfp . 2w3 . genshin impact . obey me (i stopped playing but still) . hermitcraft s10 ! nevermore . SPY X FAMILY ! MASTERLIST . CARRD (cw light mode)

hi! welcome to my blog, you can call me nessa! enjoy your stay :3

byf: i swear pretty often and have a tendency to keyboard smash A LOT. especially if i see a fic/fanart that i love. i won't reblog any nsfw fics/fanart but some of my reblogs under my #[☄️] nbr! tag may contain suggestive/dirty humour. oh btw, my blog usually doesn't run by a queue!

go ahead and interact with me, i don't bite ! 🤍 just please don't dm me unless we're close/moots! also mooties can ask for my discord or instagram :)

agere account (completely sfw!): @rambles-of-the-little

tags under the cut!

— navigation! [tags]

#[💭] my headcanons! — incorrect quotes, scenarios, short fics and actual headcanons!

#[🌺] my posts! — anything i've originally posted :)

#[🤍🖋️] my writing — similar to above, but just everything i've written, since it's the main thing i post here

#[🔄] reblogs — self explanatory, things i will reblog. mainly just to keep my blog tidy when searching through it

#[🖌️🔄] fanart rbs! — reblogs just for fanart!

#[🍃] reading recs — any fics i reblog that i adore ! you should read them too!

#[☄️] nbr! — stands for non blog related, anything that isn't a fandom related thing that i reblog/post

#[🗣️] nessa's rambles! — posts that are just me talking and thinking my thoughts, then sharing them here

#[🫗] nessa's vagueposting again — self explanatory (i literally vaguepost in my posts waaay too much; no i am not apologising for it)

#[🧍] ramble in the tags — sometimes i have a little ramble in the tags, if you're curious go ahead and have a read

#[📥] my asks!  — anything answered from asks

#[🏷️] my tags — in case i'm ever involved in a tag chain!

#[🕰️] from the queue — anything i schedule/put in the queue :>

#[🤝] genshin x obey me — any of my rambles about the crossover between my two favourite games :)

#[🎆] diayoi — to add to the rambles above ^^ this special tag is for my crossover ship rambles between yoimiya from genshin and diavolo from obey me!!

secret tag: #felt like shit might delete later — vent posts

i tag my fandoms accordingly, but i also tag anything mcyt related as #block men tag (ie the hermitcraft, life series or any other things to do with minecraft ccs in general)

^^ feel free btw!! no judgement here :]

[catbcys]

Tw for suicide/just a big vent post cuz I’ve been going over too many feelings lately

When I tried killing myself (the first time) last year I got this sense of bittersweet-ness while laying on my bathroom floor. It was like alright, the pain will end soon, and I was the happiest I had been in months knowing I had the chance of dying. Like I didn’t, because I’m still here, and I woke up so upset. Not in the hospital. Just in my bed. Alone, no messages, no concern. The world went on normally.

The night I tried, my mom yelled at me and left, my sister told me I was bothering her, and my boyfriend at the time starting ignoring my messages after he realized I wasn’t dead. And told me he didn’t care I tried to kill myself, and that it didn’t bother him. I was so alone. I know I’m not as alone now, but everything is different. I’m dealing with the aftermath and recognization of everything.

But that’s not the point. I can’t stop remember that sweet feeling I felt half drunk and wishing my body would give in soon. And it never did. 3 months later when I tried again it didn’t either. And it didn’t last May. And it didn’t in June. And the world went on normally, and it continued. And my body is still here and it’s alive and it’s moving but I’m not connected to it. So I don’t know what’s worse