#it’s soooooo good though 😭😭😭
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Welp, I was up til 2am sobbing over my silly little ghost show. I didn’t sign up for this! I thought I was prepared to be emotionally devastated this week but, oh, the hubris! I was not ready at all 😭
#it’s soooooo good though 😭😭😭#peaceful property#nothing insightful to say but omfggggggggg I need it to be next week so badly#lazzarella watches tv#literally had to soothe myself by watching a compilation of cute Achi and Karan clips 😅#but then that made me cry more 😂#I’m still shellshocked from that ending!! my stomach literally dropped#I love that peaceful property has surprised me so much but also: no. no!
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longlegs fucking sucked 😭
#talkys#sorry for movie opinions post#i didnt know anything abt it going in other than serial killer and Mystery and i was soooooo so interested and enthralled#for a good chunk bc wow i like the framing the pacing the shots!#and then it gets to a point where its like oh...!#and then 📉📉📉📉↘️↘️↘️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️#like how did that movie feel like 3 hrs long#all that build up for the most eyerolly unsatisfying payoff#do u guys think its possible for horror movies to be Satisfying anymore?#saying dis as someone not as acquainted with the genre#we were talking about how like hereditary was Good but it wasn't...Scary....but its fine bc it was good#idek what im saying anymore but we regret seeing it we shouldve gone with our parents to bingo 😭💔#the main character rocked though...so awesome will graham#so extremely funny seeing ppl being like ''ummm sorry ur someone who thinks horror movies need to be jumpscares and dont like psychological#horror :/'' this was NOT psychological horror. it was a really interesting like Mystery for a good chunk and then at that Certain Point its#like oh. horror movie version of the ''and then he woke up'' cop-out to me. how boring. what a boring conclusion#not worth the whole previous hour of Good#i will say the shots of the hooded figure with the eyes unnerved me tho i had to look away 😭#MY SISTER LITERALLY FELL ASLEEP LMAO but at that point i was still very interested and hopeful#and then.
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cant even lie to u tbh i think wolfwood broke in2 my top chara list bye
#he clawed and climbed his way up there ☝️#vash comes before him though dont get it twisted🤬☝️#no but theres smt abt this guy …#srsly srsly thought i was going to hate him#bc of the stamp characterization but noo😭 hes so goofy in trimax#and then his story is soo soo interesting and his death gave it like . x factor 293728 ykno#crossing my arms tbh#n then like . i hear aome sad mitski song idfk and then i feel like that squidward pic w his face sucked in#something soooooo good ab characters whos deaths r so motivational for both the mc and the collective cast#to the point where they become more akin 2 a symbol or like . YK i cant think of the word. bt their essence becomes this bigger than them#thing that defines the tone for the rest of the series#yah T__T#also his official art is just so good too#trigun came out of nowhere tbh i was just complaining ab needing a series for the past six months and now i cant get wnoughHAJAHAG#wolfwood#trigun#trigun spoilers#trigun maximum
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I miss my pink hair 💔
#last time I dyed it a ton of my hair fell out and I had a whole breakdown over it#like I literally called out from work sobbing because I could not stop hyperventilating and crying#my hair is so important to me#the pink was soooooo pretty though!!!! I want it back 😭#I've been wanting to cut my bangs so I'm looking through old pictures to determine the best length and there's so many pics of the pink#it looked so good#one day I'll muster up the courage to dye it again#ashley rambles
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Sorry for the Elden Ring spam this game has just consumed my entire being
#i also can't sleep and apparently my brain thinks scrolling through the er tag is gonna fix that#i am just soooooo obsessed with the game. the lore. the characters. the gameplay. everything#its so annoying too cause like i was making good progress in my other games like dmc5 insomniac spiderman sa2 p5r#<- apologies if this shows up in those tags lol#but nope! every time i think im getting somewhere with them er just pops into my head like hey you wanna play me so bad 😏#the game of all time i need the dlc to come out soon#OH and rip my totk playthrough i havent touched the game since june think i still have botw fatigue tbh#i will get back to it and beat it some day#but for now im just mentally ill over this game 😭#particularly two red headed sword ladies (related they are) and my tarnished oc#“oh cool prince do you have a new elden ring oc thats aweso-” its riku 🚶#always that fucker 🚶#BUT i am thinking of making an actual original er oc#we'll see#but yeah sorry again lol well aware that most of my mutuals prob have no clue wtf im talking about 😭#it will happen again though won't lie this game has me in a god damn chokehold
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Okay so this is gonna sound very unhinged
But the screenshot you posted of the doc for Omega Yamo had text
And I may have zoomed in and been able to decipher the words
And I’m obsessed with there being more than one Alpha in that scenario
And I think you’re a genius and I love your writing even though I probably wasn’t supposed to be able to read it
Again I’m sorry for being so insane but I couldn’t help it 🙃
SCREAMINGGGG anon i am in love with you. i appreciate the level of unhinged sooo much, the only thing you have to be sorry for is inflating my ego to an enormous size
howmstever!!! i may have tricked you!!! there are actually two omega yamo fics in the works 🤐🤫 they just happen to exist in the same document right now because ??? why not
#until one of them gets enough words to kick the other out they will coexist peacefully &i will hop between them sooo chaotic &unproductively#i keep typing things and then redacting them about the other omega yamo fic for literally no reason like. i’m telling you about it??#it’s not gonna be a surprise??? but for clarity’s sake they are not related to each other/in the same universe#and yes one of them does have multiple alphas 🤭#both fics are incredibly self-indulgent (and by extension incredibly For Y’all in my inbox) like it is just y’all 🤝 me 🤝 omega yamo#also to the other yamo/nuge anon please do not fret i see your message!! it is in my inbox!!! i just have been keeping it there#so that i can look at it because it makes me happy and also is very good motivation 🥺🥰😭#do i have a tag for omega yamo??? do i need a tag for omega yamo???? at this point probably yes#liv in the replies#i am being soooooo normal in this message and i feel like i should tell you that irl when i read this each paragraph was my jaw dropping#and then i sat there and 💕🥰🦋💗 <- shrieking for like. five minutes while trying to type. what an honor#the!!! highest!!! compliment!!!!#once again reiterating though i am so slow at writing 😭 however!! i am planning to wrap up with apps & coursework next week#& if i don’t pick up an insane amount of shifts in the four days between moves i want to write sooo much. in so many different documents 🫡#bro ALSO??? i just went to the screenshot to see what you could’ve read out from the ask and do you got eagle eyes or a magnifying glass or#how tf did you read that. what witchcraft did you work to make my blurry ass picture readable zoomed in &can i have it bc i’m using this now
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The fact that I have "Eiledon" and "Remembrance Day" in sequence on my Big Country playlist is quite the emotional knockout. Not to mention those beautiful backing vocals and harmonies by June Miles-Kingston (whose band the Mo-dettes I still have yet to look into, but I'll get there!!). But also tbh Stuart's vocal performance on "Eiledon" just...makes me wanna absolutely break down and cry, not to reference the wrong band no offense...actually offense intended, but Paul McCartney could never.
#Stuart wasn't one of the best rock vocalists or anything BUT his vocals are LITERAL PERFECTION on 'The Seer' so#I love his voice a lot :') and he improved! as a vocalist! ...UNTIL HE DIDN'T. sorry Big Country but. oh god.#the American phrasing was so cringey. SO SO SOOOOOO DEEPLY CRINGEY.#I was so disappointed to hear that he left behind his perfect vocals from 'The Seer' only to get...like...CONSISTENTLY worse.#I've only heard up to 'Peace in Our Time' though but he sounds that way even in live performances from the '90s especially.#I just had another Stuart/Janis Joplin comparison epiphany...I wonder if Janis had lived past 27 if her vocals would've gotten worse also#like if Janis would've been pressured by the music industry (or producers) like Stuart was to change her vocal technique? ...man.#& I'm not even sure if she'd sound better or worse. probably worse since HER UNIQUE VOICE/TECHNIQUE IS WHAT MADE HER SO GOOD 😭#(the same sentiment applies to Stuart there also) :'(#thoughts I have that probably nobody on this entire planet would ever have concurrently but me.#crystal visions of lilies in the valley
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how was the new little mermaid movie did u like it
I liked it!! And as a certified live action disney hater that really surprised me! I genuinely cannot think of the last disney remake i saw in theaters that wasn’t just like soul eating but this one was super fun and very cute and really makes you root for the characters! Its a bit tone deaf at parts but like tbh its disney so like honestly the rest of it was fine! I cannot defend most of the cgi but i can say you get used to it and flounder is far and away the worst character in terms of design and all the ocean scenery was genuinely beautiful and cool to see on the big screen!
#there is one scene thats meant to be like touching and heartfelt and i need you to know the theater burst out laughing#like its been a while since ive heard a theater reaction like that so it was definitely memorable#she was on screen crying and literally the theater could not stop laughing 😭😭#i do think the middle was fucking great though#i think the beginning and end are a little weaker but tbh the middle was soooooo fun and funky fresh and cool so i liked it lots#oh and i love halle okay i do i had ungodly hour on repeat for like two years but smfnkdjssk i am also a musical lover…#and she is not BAD at singing but the problem is she is GOOD at it and is good at it in the way a like album singer is vs a musical singer#bc its DIFFERENT and that definitely came through and its not BAD but its not musical either so that threw me off a bit#i genuinely think its unnoticeable if you dont have issues like i do bc none of the ppl i watched it with said anything#one of them is a disney adult basically though so lmfao maybe they dont count but NO ONE ELSE said anything#its so so so so fun though like i cannot overstate that enough like i am a genUINE hater people know this i can and will hate anything#i barely need a reason i can just do it and this movie had me laughing and having a good time before we even hit the halfway mark#so that was very impressive to me bc as mentioned i 1. love to hate and 2. was prepared to hate this so i liked it thumbs up#i definitely have thoughts on some of the new music…. but once again i have problems. i liked it 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍#v.txt#genuinely everyone slayed actually wait awkwafina was weird that was a weird bad choice casting her but EVERYTHING ELSE good 👍#melissa mccarthy especially came out swinging but also i dont like the tag here bc why are there more gifsets of the random white girl than#there are of halle 🥴🥴🥴 but whatever thats unrelated MOVIE I LIKED AND WAS FUN!!!
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thoughts on the highlight medley ? <3 i missed u on here
#NOT TO BE ME BUT BASED OFF OF THE SNIPPETS IM OBSESSEDDDDDDDD#also v surprised at how varied the songs r!! king shit tbh <33#as a noise enjoyer i look forward to super and fire sm <333#BUT THEYRE ALL SO GOOD?????? (which is not surprising but yk 😋)#i thought fml would be more like 'FML 👹' and not 'fml 😔' though NFNJDJDJDJD#so i was a TEEEENY tiny bit (not disappointed but idk the right word for it)#it just wasnt what i was expecting#but it still sounds bomb <33 not the sound i usually gravitate to though#ALSO NOT TO GET SIDETRACKED BUT IM SOOOOOO EXCITED FOR SUPER#DINO ENDING CENTER AND CHORUS HELLO????#ALSO#icb i manifested their a.c.e hanbok era i keep fucking winning 😭#I HAVE SOOO MANY THOUGHTS IM SOOO SOO PUMPED#honestly so so happy to see how successful the boys r as well 🥹🥹#that preorder number is fucking crazy#anywaY#what r ur thoughts on the medley 👁️#AND#U ARE SO CUTE PLS???? 🥹🥹🥹 thank u for even thinking of me </3#tbh it's people like u that keep me coming back here <333#i hope ure having a great one anon this ask made me smile 🥹#anon#y.ask
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Wonderful! I enjoyed this so so much. I truly had no idea what would happen next throughout reading and I love when that happens. So many moments where I was like o m g !!!! This feels so unique and special! Ahhhhh I loved it🩷🩷
Hummingbirds
~5.2k words
From me: Based on a song of the same name--you'll see the lyrics in a moment. You'll need to suspend your belief a bit. I'm not sure everything makes perfect sense, but. Some of this story takes place through emailing and I didn't have a good method for this. So bold will be Harry's emails. Pink writing will be hers.
Warnings: angst, fluff, anger honestly just fluffy. second chance love
Summary: Harry has been angry for a really really long time. Only one person ever made him confront his anger.
“Eli, baby, we have to go!”
Harry could hear her from outside. He smirked, sipping his tea while he waited for Buddy to do his business. The air was crisp just like October should be. Decorative spider webs lined the front porch and the flower bushes in front of it. He was utterly pleased with his life. So completely happy.
“Mommy! I can’t find my dinosaur sneakers!”
“I don’t know how to spell it,” Evie frowned. “I’m going to fail!”
“Just do your best and practice, my love. I believe in you,” she assured as she zipped her backpack up at the doorway and stuffed her feet into the slip-on sneakers by the door. They make me feel old, she told Harry. They’re the perfect shoes for a busy Mum, he assured her. And I think y’look hot wearing them.
“Eli, honey!” She called back. “They’re here by the front door!”
Harry couldn’t stop smiling. “How lucky am I, Buddy?” He asked shaking the leash slightly. The dog turned to him and then tugged him around the yard looking for the right spot; totally unaware or unaffected that Harry had the best life there was to live.
“I-M-P-E-R-U-T-I-V-E.”
“Close, baby girl,” she smiled encouragingly. “It’s an A, not U.”
She looked miserable as she stepped off the porch. Evie approached Harry while his wife bent to help Eli with his sneakers. “I’m going to fail, Daddy.”
He chuckled at the little nine-year-old. Crouched to her height twirling the leash tight around one hand. He straightened her little hair bow on the side of her head, pinning her hair back to one side. He kissed her forehead. “Mummy said y’were close. Y’did a great job. Y’jus’ have t’remember there’s an A,” he reminded her and then pinched her cheek gently. “Like the grade you’re going t’get, right?” He winked at her.
Evie’s sweet eyes lit up with new hope. She turned to the pretty woman at the door holding Eli’s hand to usher him quickly out of the house now that his shoes were securely on his feet. “Mommy! Did you hear what Daddy said to help me remember?”
She grinned so beautifully; it melted him. The center of his chest felt deliriously warm. It felt equivalent to being snuggled under a blanket with her, warm and close while it snowed outside their house. The kids drinking hot chocolate at the coffee table and a movie playing in the background.
It was unbelievable she was all his. “What did Daddy say, Evie?” Eli held onto her hand tight while he jumped from the second to last step of the porch while Evie explained the A she was going to get. “Well, I guess you inherited your smarts from Daddy, hmm?” Which was unequivocally a joke. She was a hundred times smarter than him. Or at least it felt that way. But he loved her so much for never making him feel less than. She was good at that. It was impossible to feel less than in her presence.
She was good at everything. Her job, being a wife, but perhaps his favorite thing, she was a tremendous mother. Something he knew she would be good at, but not to the extent he witnessed on a daily basis. Eli hurried to Harry and Buddy petting the dog’s head and giggling when he licked his face. Harry kissed the top of his head and gave his little body a squeeze. “What smarts?” Harry asked.
She rolled her eyes as she finally approached her family. “You’re plenty smart, baby,” she shook her head with a gentle smile. The two kids that looked like the perfect combination of them went to her car and climbed into their respective seats. Harry wrapped his free arm around her back and pulled her to his side. He kissed her temple, nosing along her hairline.
“Not as smart as m’beautiful wife,” he reminded her. She laughed.
“I love you.” She tilted her head up for a kiss which Harry never let her wait for.
“I love you,” he grinned into the kiss.
“Ew!” Eli called.
“Mommy, let’s go!” Evie was eager to get to school and ace her spelling test.
“Bye Daddy!” Eli shouted. She gave his cheek a final peck and she headed across the yard to take their kids to school. “See you at my soccer game!”
“Hey kitten?” He called.
“Yeah?” She asked over her shoulder.
“M’a lucky man t’have you,” he reminded her.
She shook her head, laughed. “Me too, baby. Luckiest girl in the world to have you.”
The second her door closed behind her a swarm of hummingbirds fluttered so loudly into the yard. Seemingly out of nowhere. The noise of their wings was unbelievable. A dull roar. It was hundreds of the little birds, and she paid no mind to them as she started her car. Buddy didn’t care about the intrusion either. Even the kids were indifferent. “Are y’seeing this?” He called out to her. He blinked curiously when she didn’t respond. “What’s with all the—”
*
I had a dream last night / we were married in that house you always talked about / you were rushing to get the kids to school / packing their lunches, reviewing their spelling words / it was hummingbirds
Harry’s heart was beating like he had just finished a workout. His skin felt clammy. The sheets were wrapped too tightly around his legs. He groaned as his alarm vibrated to the same hum of the birds in his dream. The music playing alongside the vibration made him grumpy. “What the fuck?” He whispered and smacked the song off. He wished he could go right back. Did Evie pass her test? Did Eli score a goal?
Did she still love him the way he dreamed about?
*
Dr. Hendren listened to Harry’s dream but very much already knew the ending. It was the same as all his dreams with the house and the girl that he had been hearing for ten years.
“Harry,” the doctor said gently as he watched Harry on his screen. “Do you know what hummingbirds symbolize?”
“No,” Harry was grumpy. He always was after a dream that was so real so lifelike. It wasn’t fair. He just wanted her back. Wanted to see her. Wanted to know.
“Healing.” Dr. Hendren was quiet while Harry processed that. He worked his jaw, swallowing, and flexing it as he tried to get the words to come out. His body felt tense. Like he was trapped inside a box that was too small. That didn’t seem right. He didn’t feel like he was healed. He was still frustrated most of the time. Work was a minor distraction, and the loneliness was crippling at times. The only reprieve was dreaming of that pretty girl he knew so many years ago.
Why did it have to be her? She didn’t deserve Harry and his bad attitude. She already suffered through it for two years at a time when life should have been fun, lovely, sweet. They were kids and Harry was an ass. He never even said he loved her back then.
“Don’t you think,” Dr. Hendren continued quietly, and Harry knew what he was going to say. “You’ve been quiet long enough about what you want?” He shrugged. “Harry,” he tutted.
“I wasn’t a good boyfriend.”
“You were a kid.”
“She deserved more.”
“Then tell her. Worst case scenario, she doesn’t want to talk to you and you’ll have some closure and you can stop dreaming about it.”
Harry remained silent, looking around his empty apartment. He took a deep breath and nodded. “Alright. I’ll reach out to her.”
“Harry,” Dr. Hendren said quietly. “Have you thought about the best-case scenario?”
He shook his head. Thatkind of hope could kill him. But he knew why the dreams were so powerful these days. Why they were so steady and quick.
Woke up bleeding from my mouth / I bit my tongue right through / well I broke the habit / I guess that I’d had it not saying the things I need to
The following morning, he searched his inbox from an email he hadn’t used in ten years and found the address he never thought he’d email again after he broke up with her way back when.
But Harry wasn’t twenty anymore. He was trying to move on. Trying to fix things that should have been fixed a long time ago. He sat on the couch, typed out seven different versions of the message and clicked send before he could overthink it any longer. He slapped the computer shut and rubbed his hands on his pants. He took a sip of the tea he made hoping to calm himself and told himself that it was okay if she didn’t answer.
Hey. Long time. Not sure if you use this email. I know it’s been a long while. Hope you’re well. ... I’ve been thinking of you. And truthfully, I had a pretty realistic dream that you were in the other night. Nothing weird. Just my old self and back then and... I don’t know. ... How are you?
If she was working, she might just be getting settled. Or maybe out with a friend. Running errands. He refrained from imagining a little family that was waiting on her for dinner but reminded himself anyway that there were a million reasons she—
His phone lit up on the table beside the computer and his heart skipped a beat.
Harry Styles. As I live and breathe :) I’m well! How are you?
That little smiley face made his heart ache with adoration for her. He could picture her pretty face smiling. But she answered.
Good. Yeah. I… I’ve been going to therapy regularly. Finally had to and... my doctor and I have discussed a lot of things. You were one of them. I just... wanted to chat with you. I’m sorry, this is so out of the blue and weird.
No! Not at all, Harry. I’m glad you reached out. It’s really nice to hear from you. Therapy? That’s amazing! Do you like it?
I’m a work in progress.
Aren’t we all? :)
He smiled feeling relieved. Even just reading words on a screen made him feel at ease. He could practically hear her sweet, encouraging voice.
What are you up to? Do you live in state still?
Yes! I actually just moved down the road from the college. I’m a guidance counselor at the local high school.
That’s lovely. I’m not surprised you accomplished your goals. Your students are lucky to have you. Are you doing okay? It has to be draining.
A lot of the time yeah. But it’s rewarding as hell. You know I love kids, and I love being able to help.
Harry wondered if it was possible to love her more than he ever had before.
There’s a shadow on my shoulder / always whispers in my ear / that I’m so angry all of the time / I should be alone another year / I didn’t say it how you needed it / must have written it down a thousand times / all the things I would scream at the top of my lungs / if I wasn’t so busy saying I’m fine.
Harry had a habit of not saying what he was feeling. He bottled so much of it up and hid it from the rest of the world. Even people he loved. When he was dating her back in college, he kept a lot hidden and exploded when she asked him simple questions about himself. Trying to understand him and why he was angry all the time. Her willingness to look past it, try and help, and just continue to be kind to him made him angry too. It was constant, draining. It was like he couldn’t help himself.
There was a tiny voice in his head that told him he was too angry for her. She deserved someone lovely and sweet. Someone who would talk to her and tell her things. Be the person she deserved. Because despite everything, Harry loved love. It was nearly impossible for him to show it back then. But he did. He wanted to love her the way she needed.
But he was so busy being angry and bottling his emotions he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t love her the right way.
It was so unfair to her and looking back on it made him feel like a proper ass.
So, he was grateful for the email communication. He couldn’t imagine having this conversation with her about all this in person. They chatted for days. Catching up on things, reminiscing. Their email chain was up to 100 something messages. Some messages were long. Harry chatted about his family and she about hers. There were updates on work. On friends they still spoke to and no longer did. The conversation continued over the course of a little under a week.
But the most shocking details came from her.
I mentioned I moved... my ex-fiancé broke off our engagement. Don’t feel too bad for me, it’s actually a relief in hindsight. Something I’ve been trying to figure through. It’s why I know that anything you feel you did wasn’t nearly as bad as you thought it was. There’s far worse relationship enders than a little bit of anger.
Jesus, I’m so sorry, kitten.
Well, isn’t that a sweet name for sore eyes :) Don’t be sorry. It’s good. I have this cute apartment to myself and it’s for the best it happened now before there were too many variables to consider...like kids or a house or something, you know? I’m definitely sad. But he wasn’t the one for me at the end of the day.
Sorry for dumping all that on you. It’s not really fair given our past. I think a lot of my friends disagree with my choice on this to let him go so it’s nice to just tell someone non-judgmental.
Harry felt angry the way he used to. The way that made him want to scream and he felt the desperate need to message Dr. Hendren because he felt out of his depth. All he said was sorry. How could she feel he was non-judgmental. He was judgmental. He was judging the fuck out of the piece of shit that broke her heart and made her sad.
But he was no better.
The man is an idiot to lose you. I know from experience.
:) I have to head to bed, there’s a big pep rally tomorrow at school so I have to have my brain ready for chaos. Sleep well Harry.
Good night, kitten.
He reread those messages over and over and right before he was going to fall asleep, his phone lit up with one more message.
You’re not an idiot by the way. He might be, but you, Harry Styles are not.
So of course, he dreamed of Evie, Eli, and the sweet girl at the other end of his emails that night.
And hummingbirds.
Thousands of hummingbirds.
*
Most of their messages were short.
I’ve been going to therapy for three years now.
That’s wonderful, Harry. Really. Do you like it?
Yeah...it’s hard.
:( Yeah... It really is. Do you like your therapist?
Yeah. I’ve had him the whole time.
Yeah? That’s good. I’m... proud of you. I don’t want to be weird about it, but I know you were angry. Really angry. It wasn’t good. You didn’t deserve that. I’m glad you have someone to help you work through it.
...You were so nice to me. When you shouldn’t have been. I didn’t treat you right.
You were wonderful, Harry. We were practically kids. If our relationship had any faults, it was because we were too young. I don’t regret a second of time being with you.
His heart skipped a beat. He felt that frustration from back when they were young, and she was so understanding but it didn’t make him grumpy or feel inadequate. All he felt was a sense of belonging. Something he probably would have felt back then if he could have gotten out of his own way. She was willing to look past it then as she was now.
You’re much too forgiving. He wrote. Because old habits die hard.
You weren’t fine, Harry. You didn’t know. We didn’t know what we were dealing with at that age.
Harry hadn’t a clue what he was dealing with. Did he even know now?
Can... can I give you something?
Give me something?
Yes. I... I can bring it to your apartment or to school or we can meet, I just... I’ve been trying to let it go but I think... I think my dream was reminding me that... there’s more to you. More I need to do for you.
Sure, if you think it will give you closure.
God, Harry wanted anything but closure.
Just to clarify: I don’t think you owe me anything.
I kept a lot hidden from you. I held back and it wasn’t fair. All you wanted was to love me and I wouldn’t let you.
It’s a vulnerable thing, Harry. To be loved. You didn’t do anything wrong. We were just young.
But... you knew I wasn’t fine, and you tried and... I just wasn’t fair to you.
You were fine, Harry. I promise. Bring me whatever it is that you need to give me to make you believe you did what you could with what you had.
*
Her apartment had a wreath on the door. It was beautiful with an array of burnt orange and red flowers and green vines. The perfect fall wreath. Beside the door were three pumpkins of different sizes. If he didn’t have her address, he almost thought he would know it was her place. He looked at the mat in front of the door that said welcome, and he wondered if there was any other place where someone actually meant it.
Swallowing, he took a deep breath and knocked. After a minute, the door was out of the way.
At 18, Harry thought she was beautiful. The most beautiful girl he had ever met. During the time they dated, he thought she got more beautiful every second. Apparently, he was right because the woman before him somehow got exponentially more beautiful. Her smile was so inviting, so warm. Like he was seeing an old friend. “Hey Harry,” her voice was sweet. Not an ounce of distrust, frustration, nothing. Their breakup was ten years ago. Not a degree of anger was left.
Harry wasn’t angry either. Not anymore. But if she had broken up with him and he hadn’t done all this work to better himself, he would have been. He didn’t know how she could be so sweet after all she went through.
“Hi,” he swallowed. “I don’t want t’keep you. S’really nice t’see you,” his dream didn’t do her justice. Sure, she was beautiful especially with their imaginary kids. Simply stunning. But this was more. This was the beautiful angel he loved so much even when she wasn’t his to love.
“You’re not keeping me; do you want to come in?” She shifted to open the door wider. “I can make some tea. Or we can order pizza?”
“No,” he shook his head. “I jus’ want t’give y’this,” he handed her the shoe box.
She opened the lid. “Well, you know I won’t say no to shoes,” she smirked.
As much as he wanted to laugh at her joke, he felt like he made a mistake. The box was out of his hands. Not because of what was in there but because of the fear of rejection and being so vulnerable. Feelings of inadequacy were currently circulating through his bloodstream. “Um... s’not—”
“What is this?” She asked, tilting her head. He swallowed, pinched his lower lip between his fingers and took a deep breath.
“S’letters.”
“Letters?”
“I wrote t’you.”
“Me?”
He took a deep breath. “M’sure y’know m’not good at saying what m’feeling.”
She replaced the lid, leaning against the frame. “I feel like I’m a little lost here, Harry.”
He nodded, shoved his hands in his pockets so he wouldn’t fidget or reach back out to take it from her. His mouth felt dry. He wished he had taken her offer for a glass of water now. “I know y’said y’thought we were fine. But m’not happy with how I treated you. Y’were an angel. The perfect girlfriend and I treated y’unfairly a lot. I guess I’ve really held onto that and some of those letters are old but when I hit low points I thought ‘bout what y’said back then. How I wasn’t on m’own. I was allowed t’be angry. But I had t’let people in. All that. I wrote t’you a lot over the years. M’therapist said it was actually one of the smartest things I’ve done on m’own,” he chuckled. “I want you t’read them. When y’have time. I guess. I don’t know,” he cleared his throat. “This is really scary,” he admitted.
“Okay,” she nodded encouragingly and reached out to his forearm. She squeezed it reassuringly. It was only a touch on his arm, and he felt so good feeling it. He knew it was her training kicking in. Like a broken, beaten student at her office door. “I can do that,” she assured him. “Do you want me to text you about each one? Or just a summary of all of them? Or do you want me to not say anything?”
He looked at his feet. “Fuck...” he whispered to himself. “I don’t know.”
“Okay,” she took a deep breath. “Thank you,” she smiled. “I’ll start reading tonight and I’ll decide in the moment. You don’t have to answer if you don’t want.”
He nodded, looked at his feet. “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry?”
“S’a lot.”
“I enjoy reading, Harry,” she grinned and moved her hand to his upper arm and soothingly rubbed up and down. “Thank you for trusting me.”
Of course he did. There was no one else he really did. He nodded, feeling nauseous but still lighter. “I’m gonna go now,” he swallowed.
“I’ll email you,” she assured him with a smile and headed inside.
*
Like it grows old real fast / how much you can love and not get it back / were we too attached? / It’s a shame how often goodbyes last / I thought we were better than that / I thought I was stronger at last.
The knock on the door was hurried, eager. Insistent on being heard.
At first, he felt frozen in the kitchen cleaning up the dinner he made himself and placing the dirty dishes in the sink. Maybe he imagined the knock. Maybe he was just dreaming again. Plus, she said she would email right? This wasn’t something to feel nervous about.
But the flutter of knocking continued. He hurried from his frozen position as the rapid taps hit the wood. He knew. His gut telling him exactly who was on the other side of that door. Taking a deep breath, he swallowed before pulling it out of the way.
“You bought me the house?!” She shrieked.
Harry dipped his head to avoid her eyes. “Yes.”
“Harry Styles, what the fuck?!”
He felt sick. “You hate it?”
Her eyes were red, glossy. Not what he expected at all. But why wasn’t it? This wasn’t normal. After a breakup of her own where she was sure she was going to marry the guy. Harry appeared out of nowhere. Telling her that he had a dream about her, and he hadn’t stopped thinking about her.
She covered her mouth and shook her head. “Harry,” she croaked.
“I’m—"
“You can’t buy me a house! We’re not even... Harry. This is insane! You have to see that!”
He shrugged. “I guess... but... I don’t know, kitten. I think about you all the time. I see this house in my sleep. I see our life in m’dreams every night.”
She was wearing only socks. Like she didn’t even have time to put on shoes. She held the paper in her hand wrinkled like she had read it hundreds of times already even though he had only given it to her the night before and he just knew which one was in her hands. She cleared her throat and read the date from ten years ago before she read the remainder of the letter.
To the resident(s) of 1278 Chestnut Street
My name is Harry Styles, and I am a college student in town. My girlfriend and I walk by your lovely home every day when we head to our favorite coffee shop after class. We love your home. Or I should say, my girlfriend LOVES your home. She claims it’s her dream home. The porch, the yard, the location... everything. She even loves your driveway. Every bit of your house is part of this fantastic dream she has of the life she wants in the future.
I don’t know if I’ll be with her forever. I am... working on myself. I’m not very good at all this relationship stuff. Especially when it comes to her. Quite frankly, I think she deserves way better than me. But on the off chance I am lucky enough to keep her in my life for as long as I would like, I want to make her dreams come true. She deserves that. She deserves every single one of her dreams to come true. She is the kind of girl that deserves every good thing that can possibly be provided for her.
If you ever find yourself selling, would you please consider emailing me first? Of course, if you have family that you plan on giving your home to, I understand. I can’t even promise I’ll be able to afford it, but I’ll want to know. If only to pass on the message to her somewhere down the line. She deserves the chance to have all her dreams come true.
I’m not sure where you are in life or if you have ever been in a relationship like this one. This girl is so special. She’s an angel. The kind of love that even a movie couldn’t show, or a book couldn’t write. I’m lucky to have her right now and I don’t know why she’s with me. I don’t know why I’m even sending this crazy letter other than I know I have to try. Even if she’s smart enough to leave me, I want her to know her dream home is available. Somewhere down the road. Even if we’re not on the same road anymore. That’s what she deserves.
I’m sorry to bother you like this. I hope you can understand what love can do to a guy in college with a girlfriend who is LEAGUES above him. Thank you for taking time to read this and I hope you continue to enjoy your lovely home.
Sincerely,
Harry
Her voice shook as she read it. “You sent that when we were in college.” He nodded, swallowed the lump in his throat and looked at the packet stapled together. “They emailed you,” she whispered. He nodded again.
“Dear Harry. We got your letter. When the time comes. We’ll be moving closer to our children. They’ve never expressed interest in our house the way you have. My wife and I met in college and believe me, I know a little something about finding the girl of your dreams. It’s nice you’re working on yourself. You deserve the life that fits this house too. We hope it’s with the girl that is leagues above you (although, we imagine she’d think differently). We’ll be in touch. The Andersons.”
Harry watched her flip the page as she made eye contact with him briefly before returning her gaze to the paper in front of her.
“Dear Harry. We hope life is treating you well. That you’re working on yourself, and your girlfriend is still around. If she’s not, we hope you’re not being too hard on yourself. We wanted to let you know we’ll soon be moving to a retirement community close to our son. We want to have you (and your girlfriend) over for dinner if you’re available. Let us know.”
Harry knew what was coming but he was still terrified. Why was she here? Barefoot. Reading the letters to him. What did she think.
“Dear Harry. It was so nice to meet you in person. Here is the contract we discussed. See you soon.”
He rubbed the back of his head. “Kitten,” he whispered.
“Dear Harry. We hope you get her back. Enjoy your home. Never stop giving out your love. The Andersons.”
She was teary, swallowing hard. Her hands were shaking as she held the papers in front of her. “You bought me a house.”
He nodded. There was a pause. “M’sorry I took so long.”
She dropped the papers and launched herself into his arms. He stumbled back at the impact. Her arms around his neck, her feet barely touching the floor as she tucked her face into his shoulder. “Harry,” she whimpered. Harry sighed, wrapped his arms tightly around her, one at her waist, the other hand cupping the back of her head.
“I’ve loved you for so long,” his voice felt raw. Like he was the one that was crying and shaking. Not her.
She sniffled and nodded. “I know,” because she did. She read every single letter. Watched the date change but one thing never did and that was the love she felt in each letter.
“M’so tired, kitten,” he croaked.
“Of what, baby?” She cupped his face. The emotion on his face was tender and nothing like she remembered from ten years prior. Her thumb soothingly rubbed his cheek.
“Life without you,” he closed his eyes tight. “This house is yours I want nothing more than for you t’have it, but I want it t’be ours.”
She sniffled, ducked her head briefly as she glanced around. “You decorated it for Halloween,” she whispered.
“You would have done better.”
She snorted. “Harry...”
“If this is the house that makes you happy then I want it jus’ as much, kitten. But you’re my home. You always have been.”
“I don’t know what to say Harry,” she whimpered.
“Say yes.”
“Harry...” she whispered.
“Please, I’m so tired of loving and loving and never feeling that way. I know s’how I made y’feel in college and y’jus’ dealt with it. Y’jus’ wanted love and I didn’t give y’what y’needed. But m’ready now. M’so ready t’do whatever y’need t’love you the way y��deserve. The way y’always deserved.”
Not for the first time in his life, Harry prayed that if this was a dream, he would never wake up.
He never thought he would hold her again. Never thought she would be in the house she always wanted. Or that she would know he was sorry for how he was back when he was an angry kid.
Perhaps most importantly, he never thought he would feel her lips on his ever again.
--
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#omg I was so enthralled I realized halfway I wasn’t taking my notes along the way#somewhere down the road. Even if we’re not on the same road anymore. LOVEEEE#the Andersons knowing she thinks differently#omg teary eyed by the end of the convo with the andersons#i’ve loved you for so long GOODNIGHT 😭😭😭🥺#watched the date change but one thing never did and that was the love she felt in each letter. LOVEEEE#when she called him baby eeeeeee !#love how this ended#okay from the top - stay with me#I love the word imperative#like the grade you’re going to get right is peak dad humor#I had a dream last night😦😦😦it was a dream ?!#the growth though by going to therapy and the self awareness and all that 🙂↕️🙂↕️#I was so excited to see how these emails were gonna go and they did not disappoint#she’s so kind#can I give you something I was like omg what is it gonna be#I had no idea#nervy#love a good wreath#he wondered if there was any other place where someone actually meant it. LOVEEE#he wrote letters😮😮🥺😩#that must’ve been so nerve racking for him to hand those over a big step for him#a house ?!!!!!!! A houseeeeeeee ?!!!!😮😮😮#him writing a letter to them is soooooo🥺🥹#okay we’re back to where I started LOL#harry styles fic rec#fic rec#so good so good#love love love#this was beautiful
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I feel like Khachaturian is such an underrated composer :<
Everyone should listen to Gayaneh >:(
#though i think most people would prob recognize sabre dance and Masquerade#but i absolutely love Gayaneh in its full form its soooooo good#and i cant recommend it to anyone UGH#like 'hey you should listen to this ballet! how long you ask? uhhhh 2½ hours.....'#though ive probably listened through the whole thing at least 10 times#ITS MY FAVVVVVVV ITS SO GOOD!!!#but i listened to it when i was reading a book. like literally only listened to this one ballet while reading it#so now whenever i listen to it i can still only think 'huh this has the essence of [novel]'#i love when music gets permanently linked in your brain with something else#so then it just has the pure essence of whatever its linked to#like i literally feel like im in the universe of that book every time i listen to Gayaneh#though its hilarious bcs the book in question is Chinese but i cant help but imagine the charas in traditional Armenian clothes instead 😭#i sent the ballet to my chinese friend and im like DOESNT THIS REMIND YOU OF [novel]#and shes like bruh of course not 😭#some fanart i have of a different chinese novel was drawn in a more slavic folk style#so thats now how i imagine this one book in my head#SORRY SUPER RANDOM TANGENT#anyways i love slavic classical composers by far the most absolutely nothing can beat them imo#but anyways listen to Gayaneh. the 2 hours are worth it i swear!!#im listening to Masquerade while i make gifs so i wonder if Jense and Mark will now have this essence#catie.rambling.txt
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Truly I’ve heard from people from all around the country that Massachusetts drivers are the worst drivers. We ate that up a little bit 💅 go us !
#tbh the street design is so scary bad here like why would you even bother following road rules#though when I was in Florida someone literally slammed on the brakes and backed up in the middle of the highway soooooo#for no reason literally no idea wtf their problem was lol good thing my friends husband is a good driver#esp because we were in a rental car 😭
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uuuu i wanna screw around in the nier tags but ive reached a point now where i know absolutely nothing and i wanna keep it that way but also i want to look at all the fanart and stuff 😭
#i just started the route(s?) after A and B as A2 and this game continues to make me soooooo sad 😭😭😭😭😭😢😢😢😢☹☹😞😟😟😫😫😫#A2 and the pod are funny though#'tell me what you want'#'fuck off'#'you dont have the authority for that now what do you want'#literally just there bc [spoilers] said so#look at me tagging spoilers for an old game#'old' its not old#btw if ur like me and consistently late to the party this is ur sign to try automata <3#its very good and on the switch#and i think they fixed PC too#☻ pretending this is an emil emoji#literally why is that an emoji outside of drakenier brainworms it just looks like blackface
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GOOD FOR YOU
PAIRINGS: nicholas alexander chavez x fem!reader
TYPE: social media au
A/N: saw an edit of him w/ this song and had to make a smau based on it:)
yourusername
📍 monte-carlo, monaco
liked by nicholasalexanderchavez, bellahadid and 677,810 others
yourusername: 🇲🇨
view 5,037 comments
user: girl— who is that?!?!?
user: YN? IS THAT A MAN ON THE LAST POST?
madelyncline: drop dead gorgeous! 🤤
↳ yourusername: says youu, bbyg;)
user: who is that?
user: how much ya’ll wanna bet it’s a formula one driver 😭
↳ user: why do you say that? lmao
↳ user: just a hunch
user: does anyone know who that is??
user: why does he look like @landonorris
user: pretty girl!! 😍
user: whoever it is, he secured a baddie
user: the life i aspire to have
user: babes, don’t be shy, tag him 😔
user: YN, DON’T GATE KEEP THAT MAN FROM US
↳ yourusername: sorry bestie 🤪 #gaslightgatekeepgirlboss
user: if it’s a formula one guy i swear—
user: someone know who it is?!??
user: the prettiest girl ever 😍
drewstarkey: 😉
↳ user: drew?!??? what are you doing here?!?!?
haileybieber: gorgg
user: is she dating drew?!!?
↳ user: can’t be, he’s got a buzz cut
user: ooh to be like yn ln 😭
user: i need to know who that lucky man is
user: who is that??!? im so invested omg
user: girl—
user: OMG 😮 WHAT IF IT’S CHARLES LECLERC??!!?
↳ user: bItch omg— imagine
↳ user: i think he had a gf, no?
↳ user: that man has a new gf every season 😭
user: I NEED ANSWERS
user: i love how everyone is so invested in her new man
user: stunning 😩
nicholasalexanderchavez
liked by yourusername, chloessevigny and 748,027 others
nicholasalexanderchavez: MONSTERS: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story is streaming now only on @netflix
tagged: @cooperkoch @bardenmantarctic @chloessevigny
view 5,027 comments
user: the series was inaccurate but you and cooper killed it
user: even though the story wasn’t portrayed right, you were great
user: DIMES DIMES DIMES DIMES
↳ user: mother fucking dimes 👏🏼
user: him and cooper deserve an oscar for their performance
user: my new obsession, i swear 😭
user: the eighth slide OMG ANSNS—
user: ariana (YN) what are you doing here?!? 👀
user: my new white boy of the month
↳ user: of the year*
user: even though it was inaccurate, he slayed
user: crushing on him and cooper HARD
user: who’s here because of tiktok???
↳ user: MEEEE
user: i have a crush on him fr 😭
user: i better see him in more movies and/or shows
user: OBSESSED OMG 😍
user: you and cooper have me on my knees omg—
user: soooooo fine
user: i binge watched the whole series in one day
↳ user: i did too 😩
user: ooouu he fit fit
user: ARE YOU SINGLE?!!?
↳ user: asking the right questions 🤣
user: nicholas, one chance is all i’m asking for
user: what a beautiful man 😩
user: anyone else see yn in the likes?
↳ user: she’s so real for that
↳ user: she just like me fr
yourusername
liked by drewstarkey, madelyncline and 704,017 others
yourusername: <3
view 5,037 comments
user: i was so convinced she was with drew
user: YN, BABES, WHO IS IT?!? 😭
↳ yourusername: that’s a secret i’ll never tell;)
user: ooooh he buff buff
madisonbaileybabe: face card never declines, oml 😍
user: that’s a HOT back omggg—
user: girl, gives us a hint, please
user: the fourth slide 😩
user: whoever he is, he’s HOT ASF
user: he looks hot, yn’s hot, i love hot people
user: pretty girl
user: and people said that it was that formula one driver 💀
madelyncline: sexyyyy
user: i NEED to know who this man is
user: it’s giving ✨ nicholas alexander chavez ✨
↳ user: LMAOOO, that’s a stretch
user: sexy backkk
user: my wife’s got a boyfriend 😭
user: bItchh- i wanna know who it is
user: tag him, don’t be scared
user: i just know he’s about to become the white boy of the month
↳ yourusername: he already is, babes 😉
↳ user: GIRL— WHAT DOES THIS MEAN??
user: my life depends on knowing who this is
user: yn, who is it?!?!???
user: his back is so hot omg
user: he must be hitting the gym often 👅
madisonbeer: gorggg 😍
user: anyone know who it is?
user: she’s soo pretty
user: who is this man?!
user: where are all the fbi girlies at when you need them??
↳ user: LITERALLY OMGG—
drewstarkey: 😏
↳ user: WHAT DO YOU KNOW?!?!?
↳ user: they were supposed to be my endgame frrr 🥺
user: he seems hot
user: gorgeous girl! 😍
nicholasalexanderchavez
liked by drewstarkey, cooperkoch and 748,910 others
nicholasalexanderchavez: monthly recap
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user: SIR—
user: hitting me with a thirst trap already?!?? 👀
user: soooo he ain’t single? 😭
user: wait a min— why does his post correlate with yn’s?
user: one chance, please! just ONE fucken chance 🙏🏼
user: THE FIRST PIC HELLO? THE SHOE?!?
↳ user: i’m confused, what?!?
↳ user: look at yn’s recent post
↳ user: bItch OMG
user: damn, so he taken?!? 💔
user: BARK BARK
user: tag her, you coward 😏
user: sooo fine omg
user: he knows how fine he is, i swear
user: @yourusername is that you?!??
user: THE THIRD POST, HELLO?!!? 👅👅👅
user: got me feeling some type of way, i swear
user: wait, is that really yn?!?
↳ user: it’s what we’re all trying to figure out
cooperkoch: 🙂↕️
user: finest man everrrrrrr
user: nicholas this nicholas that— but what about COOPER??
↳ user: say it louder, bestie
↳ user: what did man do to deserve him?!? ���
user: fuck 🫦 he’s HOT
user: my kind of man right here;)
user: LET ME BE ONE OF YOUR GIRLS, PLEASE
user: something’s purring 🫢
user: white boy of the month frfr
user: cooper’s a cutie in that fourth slide
user: drew liked!! could it be yn?!?
user: girl @yourusername this yo man??!? 👀
user: ALLLLL day AND ALLLLL NIGHT
user: oh my gawddddd 🫦
user: i can cook and clean, if you need someone
user: holyyyyyyy fuck 😍
user: third post is doing something to me 🤤
user: is he dating yn?!?!?
imessage
yourusername
liked by cooperkoch, drewstarkey and 801,035 others
yourusername: lover era 💋
view 5,036 comments
user: THE HARD LAUNCH WE HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR
user: bestie?!?!???? omg?!?!? what?!?!?
↳ yourusername: cats out the bag, i guess 🤷🏻♀️
user: oMG
user: i feel so single wtf
user: the second and fourth photo 😭
user: we get it, girl, you won
user: HE SECURED THE BADDEST BITCH OMG 😩
madelyncline: ooou she a baddddie 🫦
user: body so tea the british are coming
nicholasalexanderchavez: you look so good, baby
nicholasalexanderchavez: the most beautiful girl ever
nicholasalexanderchavez: i’m so in love with you 😘
↳ yourusername: i love youuuu 💋
cooperkoch: mom & dad
↳ yourusername: we love you, son 🫶🏼
user: ADOPT ME, PleaSE
user: idk who’s luckier 😭 him or her
user: nOt the white boy of the month
user: YN, HIDE THE EDITS FROM HIM
↳ yourusername: he’s seen them all, bestie 🤣 oops
↳ user: OMGGG?!!?
user: bitch omg
user: nicholas this nicholas that … what aBoUt YN?!? 😍
user: motHER frr 🫦
user: bestie, you’re making me feel so single 🥺
user: obx meets monsters?? 😯
user: the baddest girl everrrr
user: my yndrew heart (they better get together in the show tho)
user: YNNICHOLAS IT IS 😍
user: she’s sooo fine omg
user: @drewstarkey
user: mother is mothering ya’ll 😩
user: THE sexiest couple of 2024
user: tHat’s my girl wtf 😭😭
user: HOT omg
user: MOM AND DAD OMG 😍
user: he’s soooo 🫦🫦🫦😍😍😩🙂↕️😘👅😭🥰😋😍
nicholasalexanderchavez
liked by cooperkoch, chloessevigny and 894,729 others
nicholasalexanderchavez: 🙂↕️
tagged: @yourusername
view 6,936 comments
user: YN, GIRL, tHE TEXT?!??
↳ user: she’s so real for that lmao
user: hELp— the message
user: we get it 😭 you’re taken
user: idk if i wanna be him or yn
user: ugh, he’s sooo fine omg 🫦
yourusername: we did in fact do those things;)
yourusername: #ineedthat 🫦
yourusername: SEXc 😍
↳ nicholasalexanderchavez: you 😉
yourusername: let me show you how proud i am to be yours;)
↳ nicholasalexanderchavez: heading upstairs right now
user: soo fucken fine oml
user: VEINS VEINS VEINS
user: i NEED him soo bad omgg 😩
↳ yourusername: same!
user: HOT 🥵
user: yn’s so lucky omg
user: i feel so single wtf
user: TILL THE NEIGHBORS KNOW HIS NAME
user: 🫦🫦🫦🫦🫦🫦🫦🫦
user: @yourusername BABES, HE’S SOOO FINE 😭
user: this man is so fine 😍
user: it’s not a want, it’s a NEED
user: nicholas, let me just be one of your girls 🙏🏼
user: my body had a reaction to the third post
cooperkoch: was the text really necessary? 🤔
↳ user: 😂 cooper
user: thE THIRD POST
user: finest man ever, i swear
user: father of my kids (real) 😩
nicholasalexanderchavez and behindtheblinds
liked by yourusername, cooperkoch and 866,937 others
behindtheblinds: All eyes on him! Nicholas Alexander Chavez @nicholasalexanderchavez — the next cover star of our new HIGH ROMANCE FW 24 issue —
view 5,836 comments
yourusername: dear lord, when i go to heaven
yourusername: that’s my man, guys 🫦
↳ user: we get it, girl, we get it 😭
↳ user: okay— stop rubbing it on my face, please
↳ nicholasalexanderchavez: all yours baby @yourusername
yourusername: #ineeditdeepinsideme
↳ user: YN?!!?? (you’re so real for this)
yourusername: soooo fine oml 😍
↳ nicholasalexanderchavez: that’s you, my love 😘
user: of course yn is here in the comment being thirsty LMAO
user: YN’s COMMENt 😭
cooperkoch: slayyy
↳ nicholasalexanderchavez: 🫶🏼
user: i’m not a waitress but i’ll take the tip
nicholasalexanderchavez: mwahh
user: WE NEED A COLLAB W CALVIN KLEIN
user: dream ride 😩
user: LORD HAVE MERCY
user: i knew i’d find yn here
user: i wanna thank beyonce for your existence
user: alright— who took my pants?
user: i need to know if he’s seen the edits
↳ user: yn confirmed that he does in fact know about the edits
user: yn, i’m so jealous of you 😭
yourusername: you look soooo good 😍
↳ nicholasalexanderchavez: YOU look good;) you know you do
↳ nicholasalexanderchavez: you better feel good
↳ yourusername: I LOVE YOUUUUU ❤️
↳ nicholasalexanderchavez: I LOVE YOUUUU TOO ❤️
#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas chavez#nicholas chavez x reader#nicholas chavez x y/n#nicholas chavez fanfiction#nicholas chavez fanfic#nicholas alexander chavez x reader#smau#social media au#nicholas chavez smau#nicholas chavez fanfics#nicholas chavez imagine#nicholas alexander chavez imagine#monster: the lyle and erik menendez story#cooper koch#monsters netflix#grotesquerie#nicholasalexanderchavez#father charlie mayhew#charlie mayhew#nicholas chavez social media au#nicholas alexander#social media#au instagram#nicholas alexander fanfic#nicholas chavez fic
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rottmnt x reader || S/O who bites (out of love and affection obvi)
Rise! Donnie, Raph, Mikey, Leo x Reader (separately)
fluff? :D, gn reader, romantic (established relationship), BITING mmmm, mild swearing
Donnie
- the first time you bite him, he jumps and lets out a loud yelp, “ah! ow! what in the name of-“ then just stares at you in disbelief. absolutely incredulous. and has to take a while to process. why? why- HOW could you do this to him? after all he’s done for you?
- don’t play with him he HAS and WILL bite you back and NOT in a loving way
- he is ALWAYS on his guard
- you go in for a hug? you lean in to kiss him? you turn your head ever so slightly in his direction? his whole body tenses up. you’re giving this boy trust issues. he will physically, STILL GENTLY, push you away with his mechanical spider arm thingies…heaven forbid you bite those too….
- “Do. NOT. Bite me. Y/N.” “…”
- ^— “DO NOT. This is your last warning.”
- “Yes, Y/N. You’re very ferocious and vicious. Now STOP biting me.”
- “Sigh. That is NOT affection, Y/N.”
- “AH! Don’t bite me while I’m working, please…Don’t bite me ever!”
- “If you want to ‘show affection,’ you could just…I don’t know, hug me? or hold my hand? the biting is unnecessary.”
- NOT a fan of the biting at ALL
Raph
- The first time you bite him, “AHH!” he is confused. he does not understand. are you trying to attack him??? do you wanna throw hands??? what did he do to deserve that??? he does not want to throw hands with you
- he really does not see how biting is supposed to be showing your affection but whatever you say 😭
- his skin is pretty thick and rough. I mean you’d really have to sink your teeth in to hurt him so he just lets you. it actually lowkey tickles to him.
- “Careful. Ya don’t wanna bite my spikes.”
- it’s definitely not his favorite thing in the world but he doesn’t mind terribly if it really makes you happy and as long as it’s just you trying to show him love
- chooses to just take it as a sign that you want attention and/or some kind of affection
- would never bite you back tho
- however, I don’t suggest catching him off guard with a nibble cause he might start swingin 🤺 and would feel absolutely horrible abt it
Mikey
- the first time you bite him he’s offended. you’re gonna bite HIM? 🤨 yeah, ok buddy. he just squeaks in surprise and rubs where you bit him, looking at you like ‘😟’ before biting you back. he is taking it personally until you tell him you’re just showing affection cuz you love him soooooo much
- he’s perfectly ok with it then as long as you don’t bite him too hard
- LOVES to give and receive affection anyways so he makes it really easy to bite him when he’s clinging onto you all the time
- always giggles and squirms when you bite him
- returns your bites with kisses all over your face
Leo
- the fucking most dramatic ever
- the first time you bite him he acts like you just shot him
- “OWW!! OWIE! Ugh! Y/N! How COULD you?! BETRAYAL” while gripping where you bit his shoulder and whining like a toddler even though it did not hurt at all and you didn’t leave any sort of mark whatsoever.
- ^ drops the act completely when you tell him it was out of love
- now every time you do it he thinks you’re trying to flirt with him 🤞😔 and I mean I guess he’s sort of-ish right
- honestly he doesn’t really care but definitely teases you about it /ns
- “yeah? do I taste good, Y/N?” /ns!!
- “ow! ok, ok! not too hard!” while giggling
- “mhm…now kiss it better.” makes you kiss where you bit him every time.
——————————————————————————
now I know I ain’t the only one who bites like that 🤨
#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt#tmnt#rottmnt x reader#rise donnie#rottmnt donnie#rise donatello#rottmnt donatello#rise donnie x reader#rottmnt donnie x reader#rise donatello x reader#rottmnt donatello x reader#rise leo#rottmnt leo#rise leonardo#rottmnt leonardo#rise leo x reader#rottmnt leo x reader#rise leonardo x reader#rottmnt leonardo x reader#rise mikey#rottmnt mikey#rise michelangelo#rise mikey x reader#rottmnt mikey x reader#rise michelangelo x reader#rottmnt michelangelo x reader#rise raph#rottmnt raph#rise raph x reader
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Alastor and reader's wedding? What did her dress look like? How did Al react to her wallking down the isle?? PLEASE I NEED TO KNOW
I always cry at weddings 😭 😭 😭
Alastor X Reader Headcanons
✅️Romantic
❌️Platonic
TW: Possessive Alastor, FEELINGS
Description: ☝️⬆️
If you two got married when you were alive, then I imagine it was a very small and intimate ceremony
You and Alastor did a lot of the decorating yourselves, even making your own wedding cake because Alastor can BAKE
You two had a blast doing it too, turning everything into a little game and making deals over who could set things up the fastest/nicest
Winner gets a kiss from the loser
You two would likely only invite your closest friends and relatives(if you were close with your family that is)
If Alastor's mother was still alive by the time you guys got engaged then she 110% would be there(I genuinely don't remember when she died soooooo)
She would absolutely be his best man because who else would be worthy of such a position??
Happy tears from her the entire time
This woman will walk you down the aisle if she has to, she won't let you walk alone on your big day
Not Alastor holding back tears at the sight of his mother and soon to be wife walking towards him
Mimzy would also have been there, and she would've fought for her right as maid of honor, like physically fought off her competitors
You're haunted by the memory of it, actually
Absolutely sticks her nose in everything but only because she wants it to be perfect for you two
She will tear up anyone who throws a wrench in the ceremony and will run it better than she did her own club
"These floors better be SPOTLESS! If I see a single speck of dust on that dress-"
She probably insisted on paying for the wedding too
Alastor would probably have a last minute freak out at the thought that this is actually happening, he's getting married
But he wouldn't be nervous about you leaving him at the altar or anything like that, just normal wedding jitters
But he's resolute in the fact that he wants this, he wants to be your husband and share his life with you
And he definitely doesn't want anyone else thinking there's a chance they can take you from him
Alastor is positively radiating warmth and pride by the time you're walking down the aisle, blown away by how stunning you look
Whether the dress is unique, traditional or not even a wedding dress-he's amazed by just how good you look in it
It makes his mouth water
He's lowkey preening for you the entire time
It just makes everything seem more real to him, immediately reaching out to take your hands in order to keep himself grounded in reality
He actually is at a loss for words for once...
"You look really handsome..."
The sight of your happy blush brings him back, and he's pressing his forehead to yours
"And you look nearly as good as I do, my dear~"
Ass
The slight quiver in his smile, glassy eyes and tight grip on your hands gives him away though, you know what he really means
You look heavenly to him
Neither you or Alastor listen to a word the officiant says, too busy gazing lovingly at one another to pay them any mind
And you're definitely not getting distracted at the feeling of his thumbs gently caressing over your hands
When it comes to the vows, Alastor definitely puts his heart and soul into trying to make you cry at words
He's putting on a show for you but you love it ❤️
He looks smug as hell when he finishes
His gaze becomes softer as you say your own vows, smile becoming a little more gooey as you make his heart race
"And if anyone is opposed to this marriage, speak now or forever hold your peace."
Not Alastor and Mimzy giving death glares to anyone who would even dare saying anything
As if you two even invited anybody who would fucking try
"You may now kiss-"
Alastor doesn't even wait for him to finish, tugging you close and kissing you deeply
And once your arms wrap around his neck then maybe the kiss gets a little too intimate
Mimzy is whistling and cheering while Alastor's mother is politely looking away from you two
You two barely pull away to breathe before he kisses you again, seemingly unable to stop
He just can't believe he's kissing his wife
That he's your husband and everyone is going to know that you're not on the market anymore
Not that you ever were before
It's an embarrassingly long time before you two stop, and you're left panting, rosy-cheeked, and weak in the knees
Alastor doesn't move his arm from your waist for the rest of the night, wanting to keep you close
The only time he does let you go is when he goes to dance with his mother or when it's your turn to dance with his mother
Not her giving you both embarrassing advice about the honeymoon and early married couple life
She wants grandkids dammit
When you two are cutting the cake, he does NOT slam a slice into your face but he does put a bit of frosting on your nose
Only to lick it off a moment later
🥵 BOI
If you do it back to him then he will be properly flustered because he was banking on the fact that you would be too shocked to react
He doesn't care about wedding gifts or anything like that but his mother's blessing means everything to him
So her approval of your marriage and you as her daughter in law just solidified how important you'll always be to him
But don't worry because Mimzy definitely made sure to hook you two up with gifts
Alastor literally can't stop kissing you afterwards, your hands, your cheeks, your forehead, your neck, ect
If you return even a smidgen of that affection back to him then it'll only make him more excited for your future together
He's not even thinking of the honeymoon, he's just overwhelmed with the urge to give you affection
He just thinks about how he'll never be tired of being your husband and having you as his wife
Waking up to you, going to bed with you, cooking with you, messing with you, hell even fighting with you sounds appealing because then he can make up with you
Alastor never really thought of himself as the type to get married but you came and completely changed that with your love
Even though he was difficult and fought falling in love with you with everything he had
You fought back harder to love him
Now that he's here with you, looking at the wedding band on your finger, the loving look on your face
Your hand on his cheek gently guiding him to look into your eyes as you lean in towards him
Feeling your lips on his own as you whisper loving things against them before kissing him
He's happy you won that fight
This one was a lot of fun!! I was originally going to do two versions of this! One wedding before you two died and one for after you both were dead but then I included his mom and-
I got very carried away
#hazbin hotel x reader#alastor hazbin hotel x reader#alastor hazbin x reader#alastor x reader#hazbin x reader
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