#it’s literally like I’m going off to war I come back every so often for a week or two

[fearindulgence]

Callout, @extravagantliar is crying because I’m finally going back to the land of Tea and Rain and they waved me off at the TSA check like a little old lady waving their husband off to war.

[iloveboysinred]

That zuko smut you wrote was SO good!! is it okay if i request some nsfw hc ??? but from keith kogane, idk how to be specific lol!! Thank you sm 💗💗

Thank you anon youre my second ask ever i’m super excited !!!!! I’m glad you enjoyed it! You are so kind🥰 & Ofc you can !! I love me some Keith Kogane. Top tier boy in red

Masterlist

cw; sexually explicit content, 18+ MDNI! Nsfw under the GIF kinda long!

GIF BY @/kin-of-the-sheep

- Okay so in my head i feel like after you and all the paladins get launched into space and learn about Zarkon and the war and everything, you and Keith definitely didnt have time to really “get it on” if you know what i mean. Things were moving so fast and you all needed time to adjust.

- But after a few days of training and getting used to the fact that you’re literally in space the switch is back on for sure.

- Keith isnt a patient man. So I feel like he definitely enjoys quickies here and there around the castle. They’re never planned. Sometimes the way you train in hand to hand combat gets a little too touchy, sometimes the way you looked at him made his stomach turn and his dick jump. Keith just needs you in that exact moment, and the way ya’ll be fucking its a miracle nobody has walked in on you yet

-or maybe they just stay away on purpose 😭

- he likes to be rough during these, slapping your ass, squeezing your hips, shit even tugging on your hair. Everything is moving so fast he wants to get a feel of everything.

- but when you guys have real sex, its like night and day.

- You guys would come home from a mission, tired and scared for each other, every time you guys go out there you run the risk of being captured or worse. So immediately you and Keith embrace each other, heading to the showers to clean off.

- It starts innocent, Keith washing your back, washing your hair. He was savoring every caress, just wanting to be in your skin.

- but then he starts getting touchy feely, ghosting his fingers over your nipples, leaving soft nibbles on your neck. You feel him starting to get hard, his body pressed to yours as close as he can be.

- knowing thats on his mind, you decide to take it to his room.

- it takes you a minute to get there, because Keith kept stopping mid walk to press you against the wall and kiss you and feel you up over your towel. He gets needy fast. Like i said, he’s not a patient man.

- So, when you finally reach the intended destination, his movements are in haste, wanting to get you bare and open for him as soon as he can.

- His kisses are slow as his hands wander, holding you close to him as if he’s never going to get the chance again.

- he’s greedy with your body, eating you out messily. He wants every last drop of you, whole time relishing in the fact that you’re all his.

- every sound you make, every reaction to his touch is reserved for him. In a world where everything was taken from him, Keith wanted something to himself. Something he could take.

- So, he took and took. Orgasm after Orgasm until he was satisfied with the mess he’s made of you.

- But even then he’s not finished with you yet. He likes to watch you closely when he enters you. Eyes half lidded as the tightness of your heat squeezes around him, its utter bliss for the two of you, and he doesnt hold back.

- I dont care what anybody says, Keith is vocal during sex. He grunts and moans right above you, thrusting into you with a passion that shocks you. He loves to ask you how he makes you feel, if you like what he’s doing, ect. Despite having been in the same predicament many and i mean maaany times and knowing just how to set you off.

- “like that, baby?” “Fuck…tell me you like this dick” “take it baby, fuck!”

- Very into eye contact during sex. You guys will lock gazes often. You love to drown in his purple iris while he fucks you, getting almost lost in each other, the only thing you can think of is the stuttering of his hips as he nears his end. He’s everywhere at once, his scent, his body, his voice. All you see is Keith.

- ngl Keith folds you up into so many different positions. He just wants to be as deep and as close to you as he can. He’ll have your legs on his shoulder while he basically folds you in half, beating down into you with his forehead pressed against yours, grunting out curses as his hips rock into yours. He loves the way your face contorts with every thrust. He’ll reach between your legs, playing with you just to watch you squirm.

- He loves when you scratch up his back. It lets him know that he’s hitting it just right, boosting his ego as well as adding to his pleasure.

- he doesn’t really do pet names during sex. He’ll call you “baby,” “hun”, “beautiful” maybe even “my love” if he’s feeling sappy & he loves when you call him “baby”, “honey” or even just his name sounds good coming from your lips. But as far as daddy, sir, master?? He will roll his eyes at you so fast and look at you so crazy, it actually makes me laugh thinking about it.

- When he reaches his peak, he smashes his lips onto yours, his hips jerking into yours as he spills into you.

- But when you reach your peak he takes his time to coax you through it, riding it out with you, whispering encouragement and littering your skin with kisses as you come undone.

- after care is a must. Once you guys are all cleaned up you lovebirds will lay next to each other and lock gazes. Kissing and giggling like lovestruck puppies.

- But all that lovey dovey shit aside Keith is a freaaaaak

- Its the little things you do that really gets Keith’s blood pumping.

- like when the team found out he was half galra and Allura was being cold and standoffish to him, you didnt hesitate to rip her a new one about your man! I know thats right

- while you were bickering with her, Keith was just smug as shit, getting turned on by your protectiveness.

- soon as he got you alone he was beating your walls loose, biting you, sucking marks into your neck.

- when you get angry like that he’ll happily bottom and let you ride him. He absolutely loves when you take control and throw him around a little bit. He reaches up to play with your nipples and leave hickeys all over you as you rock yourself down on him, letting you essentially get yourself off on him any way you wanted.

- Be rough with him. Grab his hair, bite him, mark him up. He’s yours and he wants you to prove it.

- teasing Keith is a dangerous game. If you’re in public doing it especially. You’re basically asking him to break you down as soon as he gets you alone.

- sometimes it gets competitive, Keith doesnt back down and he’ll make sure you’re nothing short of a wreck by the end of the night. But you’re his perfect match. The both of you essentially going tit for tat all night. When he thrusts into you, you throw that ass back on him. When he presses heated kisses to your lips, you suck his tongue into your mouth and turn it into a make out.

- When he came back from being gone for two years with his mom, you guys fucked like animals.

- Seeing him shed his angsty teenager phase into his angsty grown ass man phase was making you feral.

- his hair had gotten longer, he was taller, and his body had become more muscular, but still lean.

- when you got him all to yourself after everyone greeted him and he delivered his news and all that, you guys were just straight up nasty.

- you had two years of no sex to make up for, after all.

- He fucked you in just about every position in the book. Doggy, missionary, cow girl, full nelson, all of it. He missed your gasps, your hushed whispers of his name as he brought you to your high. It was sentimental almost, the way his thrusts showed how much he missed you.

- and it was when you reached your peak that it really dawned on him that he could never stray too far from you. Your boy in red was wrapped around your finger, bound to you. He gazed at you in new astonishment, almost childlike wonder as you fluttered around him. Forcing his own orgasm to rack his body. He moaned, low and drawn out. Pressing his lips to yours like he always did when you reached your climax, rocking his hips gently into yours to draw it out as much as he could.

- hushed “i love yous” between the two of you as you basked in the glow of having your Keith back.

Hope you like this Anon 💕 thank you for your request/ask :> notes and reblogs are appreciated, comments, asks and submissions are welcomed !

[leo-fie]

I'm currently beginning my surely lifelong obsession with Terry Pratchett novels, two novels in, halfway through a third. All bangers.

So here's an observation that's probably not new to anyone:

Pratchett is a damn good writer very in conversation with tropes of the genres and his audience. He's ironic without being irony-poisoned.

Example: Monsterous Regiment. Amazing book, enjoyed every second of it. No fat on this one. The story and especially the characters move so fast that I often had to go back an read a page again to follow the train of thought. Pratchett doesn't spend a lot of time explaining how Character A came to Conclusion B, but he leaves enough bits of information that he can lead the reader to the conclusion exactly the moment he wants to. He has to have an extremely good grasp of how people read novels to pull this off. It worked on me and I'm not that attuned to his style yet.

I noticed that Pratchett uses a lot of ironic humour, but it feels different than the irony-poisoning that so plagued the 2000s and 2010s. Nowadays mainstream media has come back around to sincerity a bit, which is great, but Pratchett does both. How? For him, the irony is the starting point.

Monsterous Regiment has a girl disguising herself as a boy to join the military. She does this literally the moment we meet her. No preamble. The usual shenanigans one expects from this type of story are handled soon and serve additional purposes, like introducing the motive of the socks and the mystery of who gave them to Polly. Or the recurring bit about shaving that also does characterisation for Jackrum and Blouse. Etc. The actual plot is about the war. And where a lesser story might have have the climax be the reveal of the protagonist's actual sex, Pratchett does a bunch of interesting things in his climax, including the reveal, but he also ties it in with a dozen other plot threads into an amazing, complicated, messy scene of people talking.

And then again, because he knows where the audience is at, the last two reveals (Paul’s whereabouts and Maladikta) are handled rather quickly, but still appropriately. And for good measure, here’s a bit about Jackrum, in case you were thinking of reading the ending even a little bit less closely.

But Pratchett has been doing this since the beginning. Guards! Guards! Starts with a meeting of a secret society, and quite a lot of fun is made of the silly code phrases and dramatics, which are half the point of a secret society, and about the type of guy who would join. But it’s the beginning of the book, literally the set up. The irony is the starting point.

But it’s not like the ironic bits and the actual story are separated. Rather they work in tandem. In Monsterous Regiment there is so much gender going on, and it is very funny, and it explains the inherently performative nature of gender rather succinctly, but it’s also the cause of the war the brutality of which is present the whole time. It’s socks all the way down.

Also: Pratchett manages to say so much with so little words. The brutality of war stated with nothing but a bunch of guys on the road and a count of their limbs. Holy shit!

Yeah, I get why Pratchett is held in such high esteem. And I’m only reading translations.

[rinhaler]

Hey hey luxie!! Here are the rin hcs I wanted to share with u this is the same anon from the other day!

Sfw:

* friends to lovers trope is the only viable option considering his overall…disposition, there’s no other way he’d give you time of day

* Calls you otaku in a hateful way because he loves the way ur face scrunches up

* Has all of your orders at any type of eating establishment stored in his brain so he can surprise you whenever ur feeling down

* POSSESSIVE POSSESSIVE POSSESSIVE

* “What the hell are you doing hanging out with that loser?” “No, I’m coming over and we’re having a movie night.”

* Believe it or not, he blushes easily

* “Rinrin, do I look pretty?” *blush mode activated* “w-what? Yeah! Yeah, really pretty” he precedes to die of embarrassment

* Likes to scare you lmfao especially if you guys are watching a scary movie he’ll say he has to go to the bathroom and when he comes back he sneaks up behind the couch, grabs your shoulders and makes some weird ass noise and starts cackling once you scream and popcorn goes flying everywhere

* Absolute hater

* Will make fun of the music you listen to but then has a whole playlist of ur fav songs

* Simps for you so hard

* This man literally has a key to ur house and brings u coffee almost every morning

* Always wants you at his games and practices and looks for you in the stands

* He’s a little snuggle bunny it’s canon bc I said so

* Great listener but not really good at advice but will never hesitates to be your shoulder to cry on

* Often invites you to do yoga with him

* Loves to brush your hair and have spa days with you

* But know this he’s always gonna win the idgaf war

* Sidenote I feel like he knows how to skateboard and is good at it??? Must be the emo in him

Nsfw:

* Titty boiiiiiiiii

* That’s how the friendship evolved into a romantic relationship

* From starring at ur tits

* He doesn’t even realize he’s doing it or when it started happening

* “You wanna touch ‘em, rin? You’ve been starring at them a lot lately.” “Pshh whatever no I haven’t, you’re delusional!”

* Denial is a river in Egypt and he’s drowning it in, he can’t possibly want you in that way….unless?

* “Are you sure baby?” Consent king, has to make 100% sure you’re ok with it

* And after that first tit grab he’s done for

* Absolute slut for kissing and making out like literally he could cum from having his tongue in your mouth (he did the first time it happened oopsies don’t make fun of the poor baby)

* SLOBBER MONSTER OH MY GOD

* spits in ur mouth, spits on ur pussy, fucking drools allllll over you

* Loves to lick you and be licked

* Super sensitive nipples he’s kinda embarrassed by it but god does it get him bricked up

* Fav positions are missionary (mating press to be specific) and lotus. He wants to be close to you and hold you but still able to watch ur boobies bounce

* really into eye contact he knows how intense his gaze is and loves seeing you get all flustered from it and try to look away

* Grabs you by the cheeks, squishing them together a little and lightly shakes your head back and forth “nuh-uh, look at me me little girl watch me fuck this sloppy cunt”

* He’s got a dirty fuckin mouth (yum)

* “Harder rin, please baby harder!” “Yeah, you like getting your little pussy pounded? god, you’re a fucking nympho, aren’t you?”

* Once again, POSSESSIVE!!!

* “Who does this pussy belong to? It’s my fuckin pussy, only I make you feel this good, nobody else can ever make you feel like this. That’s right, call out for me baby, say my name, tell me who you love”

* Breeding kink due to said possessiveness, he came in you the first time you guys had sex, you are his and there’s no way around it

* Can and will and wants to get you pregnant he doesn’t give a fuck

* Pleasure dom he won’t stop until you’re crying or screaming or giggling from how deliriously cockdrunk you are

* Strength kink this mf just stands up and fucks u mid air, loves showing off

* Moans, groans, whines, grunts, growls, he makes every sound you could possibly think of despite him being a stone cold statue majority of the time, this is not the case during sexy time

* Oh and let me put an emphasis on the whiny part while he’s getting head

* So needy it’s kinda pathetic really but he’s soooo cute

* “Oh shit yes baby, pull it out, please baby please put my dick in that pretty mouth”

* Secretly loves being teased and edged

* Face fucker, both receiving and giving

* He lets you mount his face like a bicycle and absolutely goes to TOWN on ur pussy

* Shakes when he cums like I said he cums inside you and he actually gets pretty emotional that you just let him and trust him that much to do something so intimate with you

* Stamina is fucking insane he can go all night if you want

* But when all is said and done aftercare is really sweet and sensual, he’ll wanna cuddle for a few minutes, just hold you and caress your back and tell you how much he loves you lots of kissing too

* Once he finally gets up he’ll run a bath for the two of you and both of you wash each other off before going to bed

* But he gets out before you so he can put some fresh sheets on the bed

* Rin itoshi is a lover and a sweetheart with is s/o no one can convince otherwise

Anywayyyy ima stop myself there I could literally go on all day abt him it’s bad I’m sick in the head

⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

possessive rin is so dear to my heart I deff agree with that. like, stupidly possessive. doesn't like it when other guys look at you or breathe your air you're his and no one else's.

I love the idea of him knowing what we like to eat 🥹 I'm such a picky eater. However I also feel like he'd definitely try and get you out of your comfort zone to try new things!! But I think he'd be proud of u for trying even if u don't like what he's picking :P

HIMMMMMMM BEING A SKATEBOARDER EMO BOY IS MAKING ME CRAZY PLS

Omg u think Rin is a tits guy?? Any particular reason why or? Idk I never really thought about what he'd prefer but I kinda agree now that you've said it... (hate it for me I hate my boobs LMFAO).

HIM SHAKING WHEN HE CUMS I'M FUCKING BARKING I'M BARKBARKBARKBARKBARK I CAN'T COPE HELP I NEED HIM IMMEDIATELY

omg these are all so good I could go on so long about them all but I'd end up writing a 50k essay LMAO thank you for sending them though I'm so?? obsessed?? I wanted to post this it's been in my drafts for DAYS I've never had such an in depth ask before so I wasn't sure how to go about answering but u absolutely ate with these.. thank u for sending omgggggg I'm absolutely DROOLING

[luffyvace]

RANPO X LAZY MALE READER!!

Enjoy lovely readers! for these are the headcanons that won the poll!!♡

ranpo with a lazy male reader..an interesting topic

definitely. Especially since ranpo himself, is lazy

you two (dazai making it a trio) are the ultimate lazy duo

you guys never get work done outside your skills

maybe not even then

unless it serious y’all basically eat snacks all day and well…lazy around :)

Ranpo will only share some of his snacks with you

partly because your his lazy buddy and partly because your his boyfriend

even if you get your own if he runs out or sees one of his favorite snacks he’ll steal some of yours

To which you often move away from him to get him to stop

also don’t bother storing your snacks in your locker he’ll figure out the lock combo and eat them

bonus points if you break in his locker and steal his

at this point it’s a ‘would be romantic if you weren’t stealing it from each other’ war of buying each other snacks

also meaning you buy all his favorites and store it in your locker, knowing he’s gonna steal it, and he does the same for you

fukuzawa and yosano are used to you two’s antics of not wanting to do anything but kunikida just can’t take it

he thinks he might even go insane

actually this time

atsushi wouldn’t mind as much if your work load didn’t get dumped off on him

or if he didn’t have to clean up after you and ranpo’s snack mess

..

okay maybe atsushi is a little annoyed..

On the bright side you get lots of cuddles with ranpo

he’s the little spoon

likes to rest his head on your chest

wants to hear your heartbeat so he can fall asleep

your only complaint is that he gets snack and chocolate stains all over your shirt

even worse since your too lazy to do laundry

Oh well

if you wanna be the little spoon ranpo will whine and complain

“awhhhhh but m/nnnnnnn I’m so comfyyyyy”

you both keep persisting until you fall asleep

that cycle repeats every time you cuddle

even if he were to say yes you’d be too lazy to move

you’d likely end up just falling back asleep

ranpo would still get his way as the little spoon in the end

if you two live together oh boy you either call someone to do everything for you (kunikida)

or wait until said kunikida comes over,

turns on mom mode,

and scolds you while cleaning up + making dinner

it’s constant battles between who will do what

about literally anything too

”noooooo ranpo you do the laundryyyyy”

”but m/nnnnnnn I’m the worlds greatest detectiveeee, don’t you think I deserve spoiling??”

”you do but I’m too lazyyyy 😞”

”wowwwww so that’s how you feel about your boyfriend?? Your great detective??”

you: rolls over goes to sleep

”m/nnnnnn!! Get uppp! I did the laundry last timeeeeee!”

you, muttering before dozing off to sleep: “liarrr…”

ranpo pouts, flips over and goes to sleep as well

the laundry never got done 😋

honestly….how do I write these headcanons?!

you two are so lazy..! Nothing gets done!!

your dates are all in doors

there’s no cleaning

barely cooking

what do I say?!

I already covered physical affection too 🤦‍♀️

🧍‍♀️

stop being so lazy this is putting strife on me too!!

now I see how kunikida and atsushi feels..

what are we gonna do with you two..🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Wellllll…ranpo likely gives lazy kisses

theyre a bit long and not much effort is put into them, but love sure is

same with you!!

you two often give each other slow and gentle kisses while lazying around in bed<3

so cute!!💗

if you could ever get ranpo to cook somehow it may not taste good considering he doesn’t cook a whole lot..

your the same, except you get to choose whether your good or not

..laundry?

you rewear your same favorite clothes and ranpo pretty much does too

ranpo has worn your clothes before, claiming its his when you clearly remember buying it

you figured out it was yours but he was too lazy to take it off

“Awhhhh but m/nnnnn it took so much energy to get it onnnn”

”what?! I was planning on wearing that today!!”

”awhhh can’t you wear it tomorrow and I wear it today?!”

”only if you promise to wash it!”

”awhhhhhh!! 😞—

but I’m so lazy m/nnn”

he sits on the edge of the bed pouting

to which you take the opportunity to yank off the clothes he stole from you

”HEYY!! It took forever to get this on!! Don’t take it off!”

”it’s not yours! And if you don’t wanna wash it, you can’t wear it!”

”okay! okay! I’ll wash it! I’ll wash it!”

”good!” you: walks off to the car ”wait m/nn!! Come back! help me put it back on!!”

just for the record when you got back home it didn’t get washed

it got disregarded on the floor for a cuddles and kisses date on your bed

(yes your dates take place in your bed)

it takes forever for you two to arrive at work

your late more often than not

especially when debates about who has to drive happens

which is where kunikida steps in…again

he scolds you both for being too lazy to even move your hands and feet to get to a job which is very important because it brings in money that feeds you and..blah blah blah blah blah….

(you don’t even remember the rest you tuned out)

I honestly couldn’t choose as to whose more lazy between you two so I’ll let you do it

but in the case that your lazy and can still get some things done,

your really just burnt out not lazy yet it gets labeled as that

your tired from working and doing daily activities

especially if you have a cramped schedule like kunikida

well, maybe not like kunikida, just really packed

(No one can out-schedule that man I know it)

either way you likely do more cooking and a little bit more cleaning than ranpo

If your muscles are sore ranpo will give you a massage but your both laying down-

LOL

he might hire a professional chiropractor for a big event like your anniversary

also I feel ranpo’s love language would be quality time and physical touch

quality time because he just genuinely likes being around his boyfriend

it’s free and he feels good spending time with the one he loves?? Why not??

physical touch because it’s simply a easy and effective way for him to display his love to you

he probably leans more towards kisses in private

hand holding is his go two in public (mostly when he’s not eating snacks at the moment because he needs his hands to stuff his face—and so do you)

hugs/cuddles can go either way :)

Ngl the ada members find it cute when they see you two all snuggled up on the couch after eating a bunch of snacks

even if you two get on their nerve a bit, they can’t deny it’s truly adorable♡

thank you all so much for voting on my poll once again!!

I appreciate you all and deeply hope you enjoyed these headcanons!!!

[ficnoire2]

An Ode to The King, Briana Irene Matthews

When I say I love this character, I say it with my whole chest.  I cannot begin to express the joy I experienced when one of my fellow educators passed me this book and said “I’ve got a fantasy book for you, and there is a black girl on the cover.”  I am a child of The Neverending Story, Legend, Willow, etc (Google if you need to) and brown faces were few and far between, if there at all.  There are so many things I admire and appreciate about Bree Bree and the power she holds can’t be understated. 

*Spoilers Ahead so Exit Stage Left if You Need To*

Choices

In a story where choice has been hijacked for so many of our faves, I love the choice she makes at the end of Bloodmarked. To choose herself.  I know there has been controversy regarding this but fuck all that, she said what she said.  The fact that black girls need to be perfect and make decisions that are equally as perfect no matter what they are up against is absurd.  That line of thinking has real world consequences.  I love that she tried to consult with elders, those that came before her.  She seemed to be following this implied protocol that did not bear the fruit she’d hoped for.  

When she says, “I realize now why Jessie’s mantra to call root didn’t work for me.”  She said,  “Think of the power you possess and the woman who gave it to you.” I smile sadly,  “I used to think that woman was my mother, and through her, you.  Tried it her way and it didn’t work.  Because you all didn’t give me my power.”  I kneel to face the streams, thrust my hands into the earth from which they came. 

“I did.”

This was a hell of a scene because she is finally shutting off the noise of the outside world, the distracting chatter blocking her self actualization.  Arthur, the ancestors, the Legendborn, and choosing Bree.  Much like she puts the broken pieces of  Excalibur back together, she is in a sense doing the same for herself (pain welded blade).  It even bears a deep purple stone in the pommel. The color meant to speak to this pain, this literal and figurative bruising and beating she has taken.  In addition, the choice to go with Erebus and the uncertainty that hangs there was pure fearlessness.  As her character sheet says, she is intrepid, bold.  The way she is written, you just know it is in her soul.  As Tracy says in her dedication, For every Black girl who was “the first.”  Black is capitalized here, emphasized, because we are often demonized for making decisions or having experiences that those that came before may not have had the courage or opportunity to step into.  The First.  In Bree’s line everyone ran and she decided to stop running and turn to face the unknown, whatever may come with her chin up.  

In addition to being a clever badass, I loved watching how she navigated her relationships with Nick and Sel.  Again, another hot button topic where folks are clutching pearls and clenching ass cheeks.  I am not interested in “ship wars” but what did catch my eye was the way Bree allowed herself to be loved on.  The safety and soft intimacy she received and craved from Nick in a time where her world had been completely shattered was beautiful to read.  “I’m impressed, despite my still racing heartbeat.  How does he do it?  How does this boy navigate my emotions like a seasoned sailor, finding the clear skies and bringing them closer, when all I seem able to do is hold fast to the storms?”  He is patient with her.  The way he speaks, comforting and protective.  I love that she had this!  The giddiness at that age of meeting someone that makes you dizzy in the best way.  I love that Bree allowed herself to experience the respite Nick offered.  That relationship represents the light in her, hearkens back to a simpler time.

I also think Bree enjoys the challenge Sel presents.  Aside from him trying to kill her in the beginning (and being an all around asshole), she always seems to find interest in him (her shadow side).  “He’s dressed in black, as always, but his long coat is gone.  His tattoos are on full display below sleeves rolled at the elbow.  They wind down his forearms and wrists, and I can’t help but study them.  I wonder how far they go and how many he has before I remember that I detest him and shouldn’t care about his tattoos at all.”  

Bree is fiery (quite literally) and finds herself drawn to the darkness and mystery of Sel.  In truth, she likes to stir the pot.  When Vaughn is giving her shit about being Nick’s page, she intentionally fucks with him.  “But I’m not going to disappear.  And I don’t want to keep my head down.  Instead, I’m going to give Vaughn a glimpse of who I really am, and show him exactly who I’m not.”

She then throws the haymaker, “You’re a bigot and a bully, Scheafer.  You insult me because you think you know what I am capable of, but you don’t.  I must make you nervous, though, for you to expose your insecurities about your odds of success in the tournament.”

Long story short, Briana Irene is with the shits! How many times have you had to check in a loser such as Vaughn, who in all their mediocrity, thinks they are superior?  I love that she essentially says, “aight then.”

I say all that to say that I like that she is feeling her feelings.  She can acknowledge and accept the safety and easiness of Nick, while also reveling in the mystery and chaos of Sel.  Those two desires can (and do) live in the same body.  I love that this is confusing for her and she grapples with it because, what 16 year old wouldn’t! Low key/high key, folks my age would grapple with certain aspects of that but again, her choices.  

Bree is supposed to be complicated. At times infuriating.  I find it strange however, when folks don’t give her the space she has earned to develop.  So many of us Black girls are not afforded this space.  No room to grow, change our minds, or choose a different path.  She is grappling with grief and grief is messy, complicated.  The vessel in which she entered the world ceases to exist on the plane of the living and she is floating in the darkness and uncertainty of that.  “Your anguish is wrapped around your very heart.”   Not to mention navigating racism, sexism, supernatural beings, and understanding her own body and power.  That is a tall order.  She represents multitudes of girls who were “the first” and I am so glad I get to witness her in all her flaws and greatness.  THE KING.  Rumble black girl, rumble.  

[eelfuneral]

Some of the discussion that happens within the Star Wars fandom, particularly discussion of the Jedi, can be really upsetting to observe if you have certain disabilities. In fact, I’m having a hard time even liking the Jedi right now because I can’t help but associate them with some really ableist takes that I’ve seen in their defense.

Let me explain: a lot of people with certain disabilities (such as autism, ADHD, bipolar disorder, and C-PTSD) deal with something called emotion dysregulation, which means that you feel emotions more intensely than the average person and that this strong emotional state sticks around for far longer than it should. When you have emotional regulation issues, an event that might make somebody else a bit sad or mildly frustrated has the ability to put you out of commission for hours or even an entire day. Emotion dysregulation is very stigmatized, even in people who go out of their way to avoid harming people or lashing out while dealing with an episode. People with this specific issue are often told that they are “dramatic”, “attention seeking”, or “future abusers” for what amounts to an automatic emotional response that a person cannot control. This constant pushback forms a metaphorical blister that can easily be popped back open when you see anything that reminds you of what caused it in the first place.

Now, let’s move on to the Jedi. While it can be argued that their teachings were intended to instruct people to reign in their BEHAVIOR as a result of their emotions, several lines in the fist six movies sound an awful lot like they are condemning having negative emotions at all. Yoda literally tells both Luke and Anakin that emotions like fear and anger BY THEMSELVES are of the Dark Side, and these lines were very difficult for a lot of people who have dealt with trauma, neurodivergence, or other issues that cause “big emotions”. These lines, intentionally or not, mirror a lot of the things that real people have said to those of us dealing with emotion dysregulation, and people have every right to talk about this in their own spaces unmolested.

Some of the defenses of the Jedi in the context of how they are instructed to deal with their emotions come off as dismissive at best and ableist at worst. Yes, if you dig through Star Wars canon enough, you can find portrayals of the Jedi and emotions that point to a more nuanced view where choices and actions are the source of evil rather than the emotions, but this does not change the fact that the Yoda lines and other emotionally repressive applications of the Jedi Code very much exist in parts of canon. A person who found the emotionally repressive variant of Jedi teachings to be upsetting due to a disability will likely feel as though you are trying to dismiss their feelings and belittle them if you “correct” them for “misinterpretation of the Jedi”. I get that it sucks to see people bash your blorbos, but if someone is doing it because they are dealing with something IRL like trauma or ableism, then it’s best not to engage and just let that person work through it.

I have also seen people who are defending the Jedi make statements that outright attack people for having intense emotions. I remember a take that basically said that you were a baby or a psychopath if you found the Jedi code regarding emotions to be “too hard”. I’ve seen people dismiss the trauma that Anakin went through and its possible effect on how he reacted to some aspects of the Jedi order in a way that mirrors the invalidation that those of us with emotional regulation issues have experienced for being “too much” for all of our lives. Yes, it is important to avoid harming others when you are in a bad place, and no Anakin was not a great person, but so many of these takes are devoid enough of nuance that they read as if they are just trashing people who have “too many”emotions.

Feel free to defend your favorite characters all that you would like, but please spare a thought for those of us who might not dig everything about them for reasons connected to disability and trauma. The Jedi aren’t real, but we very much are.

[ambrosearietes]

We (and by that I mean myself) demand more headcanons cuz they go hard asf😈

i have so many i’m gonna break these up by character. i will only do like the major ones. these are not all my headcanons just my big ones.

ADAM

despite living in slavic countries for most of his life, adam speaks english with a british accent because he learned it from anthony. he can also do a perfect american accent because he played WAAAAAAAYYYYYY too much fallout

adam is autistic (this one actually is canon, i mean come On dude) but also has ADHD and C-PTSD

scrawny because he was malnourished during his time as d-class. very insecure about it.

he and sylvester sloan know each other through anthony. i mentioned that sloan babysat adam occasionally, i was completely serious. he let adam watch star wars and adam literally wanted to BE luke skywalker.

yeah luke was his gender awakening

uses she/her to refer to his younger self from before anthony saved him as a coping mechanism— in reality he’s trying to deny that it even happened to him in the first place.

smokes weed when the team is off. calvin does not approve.

marries harvey in every stardew valley playthrough.

romances halsin in baldur’s gate 3.

cracked at fromsoft games.

CALVIN

bisexual, he just doesn’t realize it.

calvin is a gamer. he had adam build him a setup. they play together. adam beats his fucking ass in everything and makes fun of him for it.

really, really bad habit of bottling his emotions (which is why olivia keeps dumping him)

was ~19 when he got arrested for the stuff hyun-ki mentioned. vehicular manslaughter while driving under the influence is considered a felony charge.

grew up in the midwest. talks like a midwestern dad.

his aunt owns a horse ranch. calvin REALLY likes horses as a result.

he once promised adam to take him to meet his horse and teach him to ride after everything. poor guys :(

he and aaron would have had a father-son relationship.

he was a very “difficult” child due to him not being believed about his mother’s death. he had no idea how to cope with it. often got into fights, which is why his aunt ended up sending him to boarding school. she got a lot of calls even when he was there because calvin just. got into a fuckton of fights.

he didn’t go to therapy until the insurgency MADE HIM go to therapy.

legally can’t drive. doesn’t give a fuck.

he would occasionally let adam just lay on top of him like a cat. he thought it was platonic. like just guys being dudes.

would be a good father.

if he saw his dad again he’d shoot the guy without any hesitation.

blames the foundation’s negligence for his mom’s death.

likes planes a lot.

OLIVIA

sees adam as her little brother. they’re extremely close by O5-3’s chapter. she’s rather protective and very quick to defend him.

adam taught her to play dungeons and dragons and gives her book recommendations. she plays a halfling life-domain cleric/college of swords bard (multiclassing)

loves mystery novels.

adam introduced her to stardew valley. she usually marries leah.

bisexual. does not know this.

easily frustrated with calvin because calvin is terrible at communicating his feelings. calvin is trying to work on this. it’s going terribly. despite this, calvin is very affectionate with her and she does how open he is with that.

very relationship-centric person. this is mostly because she didn’t get much characterization in twie.

keeps a sketchbook. mostly doodles flowers.

her and sophia would have gotten along amazingly.

likes to dabble in poetry.

would romance wyll in bg3

huge fan of law and order. adam questions her taste in television shows.

if she had procreate she’d be fucking unstoppable.

i don’t have much on her bc characterization is so lacking :((

would have gladly taken sam (O5-11) with her back to the insurgency. deeply regrets that she didn’t. she thinks about sam a LOT, it genuinely haunts her. like she will try to sleep and she’ll just hear that gunshot and want to throw up.

VINCENT ARIANS / ANTHONY WRIGHT

i don’t remember if i mentioned this in the last post but vincent is a cat person. had a cat named mira. she was a calico.

insomniac.

in his ‘ideal world’ he would have lived with aaron and been able to raise adam.

very, very envious of people with ‘normal lives’.

we don’t know much about what vincent did in the foundation— the dialogue from O5-13 at the end of the children matches up with what he tells aaron in the apartment scene so i assume vincent was felix’s predecessor and felix held another number. as for what he did, we do know he was, like, an ACTUAL engineer who designed bombs at some point (stated in O5-5’s chapter); he could have been in charge of security.

it’s implied he had a second-in-command type position under aaron and likely was on the first delta command before his first ‘disappearance’, unless he wrote the summa modus operandi then just vanished off the face of the fucking earth for a while.

records of vincent are next to impossible to find within the insurgency as he worked so closely with the engineer and they don’t even know who the engineer was.

aaron thought vincent was dead until he received reports of anthony wright working with calvin.

anthony and sloan were good friends and out of all members of delta command during the way it ends, he respected sloan the most. anthony would have considered an actual relationship with him if he wasn’t like “no, i’m probably gonna disappear again or just straight up die soon anyway.” anthony was right, he did in fact die.

sloan knew who vincent arians was, he just had no idea that anthony and vincent were the same person.

genuinely, anthony wanted to die.

adam gave him a reason to live outside of vengeance.

GENUINELY sees adam as his son. he’s a bit harsh on him during TWIE because he never wanted adam in the insurgency at all. he and adam had a conversation at some point where anthony expressed this and told adam he wished the latter just went to a good college and worked in programming or IT.

would not have been able to kill calvin had he made it to the end. would also have not been able to kill aaron.

frederick traumatized this man just as much as he traumatized aaron, vincent just absolutely refuses to acknowledge it.

sophia knew about vincent’s love for aaron and may have even encouraged it.

if his love for aaron was reciprocated, they likely had a relationship while aaron was with the insurgency and tried to be secretive about it but felix carter just “I know what you are.”

he would be very sweet as a lover. very sappy. hopeless romantic. given who he was in love with, are we even surprised?

cigarettes are part of how he started aging again.

the insurgency kind of knows he’s older than he looks, they just say he’s in his fifties because he looks like it, but even TWIE says he’s been around as long as anyone can remember. likely, vincent surfaced as anthony wright around the same time that sylvester sloan joined the insurgency.

his plan in case anyone saw any old photos of vincent and noticed that he looked eerily similar to anthony was to say that he’s vincent arians’ grandson and that his mother was arians’ daughter.

vincent had no children, but he did like being around kids.

during his years with the foundation he’d often lock himself in his lab just to cry. aaron often checked in on him.

frederick repeatedly called him aaron’s dog as a joke that vincent found very not funny. vincent/anthony isn’t really big on dogs because of this.

if anthony saw adam today he’d be immensely proud.

if anthony had made it to the end he would have tried to make aaron tell him why he left. aaron would not have been able to tell him.

anthony was a bit scared of how much like aaron calvin is.

would have liked O5-11 if they met.

AARON SIEGEL / O5-1 “THE MAN WITH THE INFINITY GUN,” “THE FOUNDER”

if you claim to be frederick’s #1 hater and you’re not aaron siegel then you’re fucking lying.

very sappy romantic, similar to vincent, but only with sophia. she thinks it’s adorable. he just really loves his wife a lot.

cannot let go of anything for shit. if he was at the scene of vincent’s death he would have tried to bring him back.

had a very weird father-child relationship with sam.

tolerated most of the other O5s at best, especially rufus (O5-6) and valerie (O5-7).

felix has always been his favorite aside from sophia (and vincent during the insurgency days)

borderline personality disorder

capable of straight up hanging up on frederick. this annoys the absolute fuck out of frederick.

PETTIEST BITCH IN THE WOOOORRRLLLDDD he’s like a fucking crow

sees mortimer (O5-5) as family because he’s the grandfather of alison chao, at least in other realities. mortimer gets along well with aaron.

very easily sent into overstimulation, it’s unknown why. he’s only ever perfectly calm in a sensory deprivation chamber.

extremely pale.

lives at overwatch. often falls asleep at his desk or on the fucking floor.

wreck of a man, but a surprisingly exceptional leader when he actually feels like leading instead of letting valerie handle things.

the other O5s don’t even know much about him.

visits san marco as much as he can.

FREDERICK WILLIAMS / THE ADMINISTRATOR

obsessed with the string theory, literally discovered it before the idea was even conceived.

had a wife and daughter, both died horribly. his daughter was extremely young and he’s a tad bit obsessed with the idea of bringing her back. driven by grief but also the fact he’s just a Bad Person in General

extremely manipulative (canon), but also just likes to fuck with people.

sometimes he doesn’t even call aaron or calvin he just speaks into their heads.

sometimes he’ll just call them and ask shit like this. aaron would hang up on him but calvin can’t.

can manifest however he wants, he usually chooses the phone.

reality bender (canon) and extremely powerful at it. like it’s lowkey concerning.

god complex.

totally the kind of guy to go “no don’t kill me im just a girl”

adam ivanov as the engineer would beat the shit out of him if given the chance.

what aaron described in the apartment scene was literal psychological torture. aaron was not the only person he subjected, just his favorite punching bag.

aaron, near the end of his life, got him a world’s worst boss mug and kept it next to the phone. calvin got a second one just to drive the point home.

a bit obsessed with antediluvian anomalies (project paragon). talks to calvin about them extensively.

hated vincent for no real reason he was just a bitch.

[1-800-local-slut]

With a Heavy Heart- Chapter 3

𝒲𝒶𝓇𝓃𝒾𝓃ℊ𝓈： 𝓈𝓉ℯ𝒶𝓁𝒾𝓃ℊ， 𝓋𝒾ℴ𝓁ℯ𝓃𝒸ℯ 𝒯𝒲： 𝒥*𝒽𝓃 𝒲𝒾𝓃𝒸****ℯ𝓇， 𝒸𝒽𝒾𝓁𝒹 𝒶𝒷𝓊𝓈ℯ （𝒸𝒽𝒾𝓁𝒹 𝓃ℯℊ𝓁ℯ𝒸𝓉， 𝒸𝒽𝒾𝓁𝒹 𝒶𝒷𝒶𝓃𝒹ℴ𝓃𝓂ℯ𝓃𝓉）, 𝒶𝓃ℊ𝓈𝓉，𝓈𝓂ℴ𝓀𝒾𝓃𝑔，𝓂ℴ𝓃𝓈𝓉ℯ𝓇𝓈，𝓁𝒾𝓉ℯ𝓇𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎 𝓅𝓁𝒶𝓃𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓂𝓊𝓇𝒹ℯ𝓇 𝓁ℴ𝓁， 𝒥ℴ𝒽𝓃’𝓈 𝒶 𝒷𝒶𝒹 𝓅𝒶𝓇ℯ𝓃𝓉 𝒷𝓊𝓉 𝓌ℯ 𝒶𝓁𝓇ℯ𝒶𝒹𝓎 𝓀𝓃ℯ𝓌 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉，𝓂ℴ𝓂𝓂𝓎 𝒾𝓈𝓈𝓊ℯ𝓈

༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻

August 16th, 1997

Dear diary- It’s been awhile, I know. But I have a lot to tell you, and I hope you're ready to hear about it. So to start off, mom’s been letting me take solos. I only take small , simple ones close to hers. I can’t hunt with her, she’s either always rushing or always in my way. The older I get it, the more it seems like my mom and I should just go our separate ways. This new system has been helping, she just gives me a few hundred dollars, a bus ticket, and sends me on my way if we’re out of state on spring break or something. Then she’ll call me when it's time for us to leave and meet me at whatever shitty diner she picks. I think when I get my own car though, (i’ve been saving up), I probably won’t see her anymore. Or at least not as often.

There won’t be much keeping me attached to her other than her being my mom. That’s starting to lose meaning in itself. Maybe I should wait until I’m 18. I’m going into my senior year, and I’ll take some time off to sort myself out. I don’t want to enter university to early. Two years off won’t really do anything, and once I turn 17 I’ll start applying to colleges. Or I’ll do online. I saw it on the news a few years ago, 1989, University of Phoenix started an online university. I have the proper grades and credentials to get into a good school and thanks to my stubbornness, I was able to stay in Maryland for school all four years. She also leaves me home alone most times. Said she couldn’t stay tied down in one state for too long. That’s her business though. I think she’s been gone for three weeks, right now she’s hunting a wraith in Wyoming. Then afterwards, she has a banshee in Florida. She won’t be back for a while.

She said her only rules are not to let anyone in at night, and keep an eye on any guest I have during the day. We’ve been staying at my Aunt Lacy’s house, she gave it to my mom when my mom told her we were moving here for school. Aunt Lacy left her car here too, but I don’t drive it often. I don’t have my license and I really do have to stay out of trouble here so I usually walk or catch a bus anywhere I need to go.

I like the house. It’s big, we have tons of space, I get my own room and my own room to do research for my cases. There are two guest rooms as well, I’ve been storing stuff in them though. My mom has never been big on research but she’ll do it if she has too or if she’s in the mood. I like research. It’s easy, and makes sense. I have broken her rules though.

Whenever Dean’s in Maryland or passing through, I let him stay here. He comes to visit me whenever he has the chance. Every time he leaves, it's like one of those movies where the woman sends her lover off to war. I don’t feel bad about breaking my moms rules. I personally feel like it’s not her business what I do. She literally chooses not to be here, it’s not like she’ll know. That’s the next thing I have to tell you! Dean’s bus gets here in a few hours, 7:30 in the morning. I’m excited. When Dean comes, it’s like my own little slice of peace in the world. He’s so sweet with me. He takes away the loneliness for just a few days.

Something else that helps with the loneliness is that mom let me get a cat. He was a stray kitten we found in Tallahassee on our move up here. We fought and I ran away over him, because I couldn’t take being alone anymore. She found me and let me keep him. His name is Salem. Salem Grim. I named him after the cat from Sabrina but I feel like the name fits.

He likes to come with me on my nightwalks and when I visit the cemetery. I’ve been going to visit grandpa every now and again. One issue with Salem is that he keeps trying to eat my cigarettes if he gets into my purse. He hasn’t succeeded in the three times I caught him trying.

 Speaking of those, I lost my cigarettes on the bus ride back from my last hunt. I noticed after dinner. I think they fell out of my purse when the driver swerved like a fucking crazy person and I smacked my head on the window. On the bright side, Dean can get them for me when he’s here and I won’t have to steal them from the convenience store. He's finally old enough to look 21 for his fake ID, John won't even bother him about drinking too much anymore either.

And let’s talk about Dean. He gets more and more handsome everytime I see him. I think I have a crush on him, but honestly? I don’t feel like dealing with that. I don’t think I’m ready. I have enough issues of my own to work through, and Dean’s too emotionally constipated to work through his own issues. He has a new girlfriend in every state. I have my own steady trail of broken hearts (plus if I flirt with Maya's older brother enough he'll get me all the cigarettes and hard liquor I want). Plus I don't want to confess then end up looking fucking stupid!

Would he even be loyal if he knew how I felt about him? He cheated on his last girlfriend (who cursed him out when she caught him and honestly she was right but I won’t tell him that) and even though sometimes it feels like he looks at me like I’m the only girl in the world that might not mean anything to him.

I’ll have to hit the grocery store when Dean comes by, he’ll drive in Lacy’s car for me  (I love when Dean drives me around, and does all the heavy lifting. It’s hot) and we’ll go together. I love that part of his visits when he gets to stay here for a while. I’m gonna head to sleep, I have to get him from the bus stop early in the morning. I’ll write more tomorrow.

༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻

Dean stepped off the bus, the warm air touching his skin and he clutched his backpack. He squinted through the sunlight, and glanced around looking for his friend. Friend seemed like a bit of an insult these days considering his feelings, but he shook those thoughts from his head. All Dean was really worried about was getting into her nice, air conditioned house and away from the heat of the Sun.

He walked onto the sidewalk, and noticed a cherry red car across the street with the lovely lady he’s spent so much of his time with but not enough in his opinion. She was leaning against her aunt's cherry red 1969 Mustang convertible. God, she looked better every time he saw her. She had on a pair of cheetah print sunglasses and was chewing on a piece of gum.

He smiled at her, and jogged across the street to meet up with her. 

“Hey sweetheart.” With a coy smile matching his own, she pushed off the car and pulled him into a hug. He felt a pair of soft lips touch his neck right on his pulse. Good God. Part of him hoped she left a stain. He suppressed a pleased hum. Dean took a small chance and slid his hands down her waist. After a few seconds the two pulled apart. 

“How was your bus ride?” She asked him, walking around to the other side of the car and hopping over the door into the passenger's seat. Dean giggled, knowing she’d always let him drive. He liked it that way, it made him feel like he was her man. Even though he was 99.99% sure it was just because he had an actual license, he'd let himself be delusional. He liked his little rendezvous to Maryland. While he didn’t personally like the state, he liked who was in it.

“It was alright. I’m coming in from Maine so it was a bitch and a half getting here. Dad and Sammy are gonna head to Illinois but dad sent me to handle what’s been terrorizing y’all here in the Old Line state.” Dean responded, throwing his bags into the back seat. Right now he was just on a regular ghost hunt, a salt and burn. It’d take him a few days to deal with, but he was gonna stay for about a week. Even if he had to lie to his dad, which he was definitely about to do.

He liked having a place to return too with food in it that wasn’t a shitty motel. He liked having someone walking around in his t-shirts and flannel shirts, cooking breakfast and doing laundry. You know, instead of the three times it sometimes takes him and Sam to do their laundry correctly.

All he had to do was take out the trash at night, wash up the dishes, maybe cut the grass, and do manual labor. He literally does way harder work than that everyday. In return, he got to cuddle up next too the girl of his dreams every night. No other girl in any other state could compare to her. Sure there were a lot, but in each of them he looked for her. In each of them, he’d look for her strong personality, her unbreakable will and some level of the comfort, trust and safety he had with her. And sure he found girls with those traits, but still none of them were her. None of them could ever be her.

“Good. I just got back from a case in Pennsylvania a few days ago. I got jumped by skinwalkers.” She lifted her hair off her shoulder while she slipped her seatbelt on. Dean chuckled, knowing about her hatred of skinwalkers. She said something about them just made her angry, maybe it was the deceit. His eyes stuck to the way her hair framed her beautiful face despite the white bandana she had tied the front of her hair back to keep it from her eyes.

Ever since she stopped wearing her hair in braids all the time, Dean was enamored by her afro. He loved hearing her talk about it too. Learning about the different hair types during a trip to the hair store was strangely the highlight of his week last time he was here. It was big, and as much as she complained about it she also talked about how much she adored her own hair. Dean loved watching her pick her hair out, and comb her hair into braids before sleeping, and put her myriad of products that were in bottles like potions in her hair. He loved the silk texture of her hair ties and bonnets too.

“Is that your way of telling me you’re not riding with me for this one?” She glared at him playfully and then broke out into a smile but the question was a heavy one. Dean knew she hated leaving for hunts in general but, leaving for days plus encountering her least favorite monster? There’s no way she’d want to go find a ghost. He frowned a bit, knowing he’d be alone on the road for at least two days when she was just a few hours away from him. And no one can start a fire faster than her, which was a plus when one needed to light shit on fire.

“It’s my way of saying I will stay in the car and give moral support.” With a large, dramatic grin, Dean playfully rolled his eyes at her smile. Her hair glittered in the sunlight and it matched her beautiful smile. Starting the car, he grabbed the stick shift and reversed the car. 

They cruised down the street making leisure conversation until eventually they pulled up to the gorgeous home. The Sun shone on her skin, painting her a gorgeous sun kissed color. Her lips had gloss on them that Dean just wanted to kiss off. Pulling into the driveway and parking. Dean stepped out first, before he ran around the front of the car.

He popped open the car door for her and she stepped out, uttering a soft ‘thank you’. Handing him his bag, they began to walk up the porch, leaving the car on the street. It would be a few minutes of them in the house before they went to the grocery store, no point reopening the garage. Behind her Dean stopped staring at her from behind for a few minutes, and looked around. The neighborhood was beautiful, one with kids playing up and down the street, some adults rode past on their bikes calling out good mornings. In front of him, the younger huntress called back a good morning to a man on a bike who called out to her.

People knew her here. She had been here long enough for her neighbors to recognize her and wave hello when she got home. Long enough for her neighbors to raise an eyebrow upon seeing Dean go inside with her, clearly knowing it was just her and her mom. Dean felt a pang of jealousy, and another weight settled over him. She had normalcy. Consistency. Neighbors who worried about a strange young man entering her home, who knew that it was just her living in that big house. Who looked out for intruders, out of kindness for their teenage neighbor whose mom was always away working some job that prevented her from being fully present.

The front door unlocked and she pushed it open for Dean. He stepped inside, putting his bag down next to the door. The house was still beautiful, with its usual cozy air. The living room he stood in now was just as welcoming as it was last time he was here.

It was his 18th birthday, with her mom here with his dad and Sammy. They needed help researching a case. That same night Dean snuck out of the guest room and into her room where she left the door unlocked for him. The 16 year old laid on his chest while they watched TV, something simple. He still remembered the comfort her soft pajamas and many sheets gave to his tense muscles. She had asked him, ‘are you scared to turn 18’ and he replied ‘what do I have to be scared of’ and she didn’t answer. Then two hours later, 17 turned to 18 as the clock struck midnight. With a soft kiss to his clothed chest, she wished him a happy birthday.

 January 24th 1997, he laid in the room with her while she snuggled into him. He understood then what he had to be afraid of. Rain poured outside the window, the soft pattering of the rain matched his quickening heartbeat.  He was technically an adult now. He didn’t graduate high school, he didn’t have any other plans with his life that didn’t involve hunting (he honestly gave up quitting long ago but the idea still danced in his brain at times), he didn’t even have a job that gave him money.

What if some day he was given the chance to get out? What would he have then? He wouldn't be able to do anything, as far as the government is aware he just fell off the Earth with his dad and brother after a freak accident that killed his mom. How do you go back into the regular world? Waves of anxiety began to wash over him in just a few seconds and then they were washed away. He felt toned arms squishing him. 

“Happy Birthday, Dean.” She whispered softly. Right. He wasn’t alone. He relaxed his arms and relaxed his tightened grip on her that he didn’t even realize he had. 

“It’ll be okay. You’ll be okay, it’ll work out.” And Dean remembered those words fondly. He remembered how she smiled at him and ran her nails through his hair. That was when. That was the moment when Dean felt his heart swell with comfort and love. She held him through the short waves of panic, and from then Dean knew he wanted no one else in this world. Eventually they drifted off into a calm sleep, and Dean didn’t even wake up to sneak back into his room with his dad and Sammy. For once he let himself sleep in and nothing woke him while he was in her arms. Not Sammy, not his dad, nothing.

Now, Dean was sitting on a soft red porch swing, holding a glass of lemonade.

“Thanks sweetheart. So what’s the agenda for today?” He asked while taking a sip and holding his arm out for her to sit down next to him. She complied, and snuggled into his muscular frame. Dean loved holding her, she always felt like a pillow and smelt like lavender, vanilla and cocoa butter. A muscular arm wrapped around her and she brought her knees up for her chest and pressed her back into his side.

A book was placed down, with a steaming cup of tea on the small table right next to her and her purse right next to it. Wrapping her own arms around her knees Dean admired her face while she thought. Salem jumped up in front of the two and attempted to crawl onto his owner's lap and received head scratches. Dean reached around and gave the loveable cat some affection as well. 

“I was thinking we could hit the grocery store in about an hour, then the deli and the fruit market. I haven’t gone since I came back. Then we can do some research for your case, have dinner and get you set to head out tomorrow.” Of course she thought it all out. One of the many things he loved about her. He nodded and pulled her closer to him while she ran her hands over the fur of Salem.

“Can we get pie?” 

“I already put it on the list. Can you buy me cigarettes?” He hid a smile at hearing she already put his food on the list. It made his heart flutter and he hoped she couldn’t feel it. She frowned and muttered something about sooner rather than later.

“Only if you let me have beers too.” Upon hearing his request she snapped up and turned, slapping him on his chest. 

“Absolutely not! Last time you never finished them. I had to drink four on my own before my mom found them.” Dean laughed at the wagging finger in front of his face. In his defense, last time he had to leave early. John called him, saying Sam came down with a fever and he needed Dean back to help as soon as possible. So he woke her up three days before he planned to leave, told her the news and left to catch a bus to New York.

"Why didn't you just throw them away or give them to one of your friends?" Dean asked through breathless chuckles.

"I panicked and drank them all but then I was drunk and had to just toss the bottles out the window so they'd land in a bush." She laughed, hiding her face in her hands and Dean took special notice to how the Sun caught in her brown eyes. She way her shoulders shook lightly with each inhale.

“You can’t get ‘em without me sweetheart.” With a huff, she then playfully rolled her eyes and went back to leaning against him. Dean was just happy that she relished being around him in any capacity.

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It was dark now. The Sun fully set ten minutes ago, as Dean drove the car filled with groceries down the street. They’d been out all day, getting groceries, trying new food, and when she discovered that Dean only had three pairs of underwear, they went straight to the store to get him some new clothing. Now all they needed to do was pick up dinner, some beers and they’d have themselves a set night. A random song played through the radio. Her eyes were shut in peace while the wind blew across her face. Even at night, the moonlight illuminated her warm skin and kissed her cheeks. 

Returning his focus to the road, Dean continued to drive until he pulled up to a 7-Eleven across the street from a restaurant she told him had some really good Chinese food. Dean didn’t care though, as long as he got food in his body. 

“Get up.” He whispered as he nudged the still girl. He took the chance to stare at her. Her lashes fluttered against her skin and her two toned lips were plump and full. Dean admired her until her eyes quickly shot open. Creepy as shit but he’d let it go.

“Oh are we here?” She asked as she looked at Dean who averted her gaze. 

“We are. Let’s hurry up before the groceries go bad.” Dean repeated his usual habit of opening the door for her and she stepped out. As she laid her head on his shoulder covered in his dads leather jacket, she shook sleep out of her body. Standing still, Dean glanced up at the stars that twinkled through the sky. 

“I’m gonna go order the food. I want Marlboro blacks and nothing else.” With a stretch Dean stuck up a thumb and winked at her. 

“Oooo charming.” She remarked with a teasing smirk while the two separated from the parking lot. Dean entered the 7-Eleven, wandering to the back. He fucked around for five minutes, looking through magazines and CD’s. Then he spent another five debating which slushie he should get and if he even wanted one. He decided against it in the end. He grabbed two six packs of beers, then went up to the cash register. The cashier stared at him with a blank stare that sent a chill through Dean’s spine and activated some bloodlust in him that he only ever got while hunting. Still, it could’ve just been an actual chill. Maybe he was just cold.

“Marlboro blacks.” Dean kept his eyes glued on the woman who blinked up at him for two minutes. Then she broke out into a wild, large smile that allowed Dean to see all of her teeth and gums. He shuddered, as she swung her body around instead of simply turning her neck. Her arms seemed incredibly long, too long and thick for her small body. Like they were trying to change into something else. That certainly wasn’t normal. He licked his lips as his eyes narrowed as he contemplated his choices.

Did he kill it? Interrogate it? As Dean thought, he let his eyes travel to the glass the cigarettes were behind. He was met with purely white eyes in the reflection staring right back at him as a car drove past and the light shone in. Dean’s blood went cold. The woman was no longer smiling, a straight face with deep frown lines, while her long arms opened the display then threw the pack onto the counter behind her.

For a moment Dean was frozen. Completely frozen, which is the number one thing you should never do in an encounter like this. But he had no idea what this was. Did he leave it alone? Did he just run away? Did he say something to it? A few more seconds passed. Suddenly the door opened and in walked his huntress.

“What the fuck is taking you so long?” For some reason she didn’t come inside, but stuck the top part of her body inside.

“Nothing, I was just-” He started as the woman resumed moving around again, and she turned back to face Dean. Her eyes were completely normal and she blinked with a warm smile. 

“I got the food, let’s go.” She was rushing to leave, her mouth set in a deep frown. Dean nodded at her, left 20 dollars on the counter and grabbed a lighter on his way out.

“Thank you! Come again soon!” The ‘woman’ called while the two hunters fled. They made their way back to the car, and Dean didn’t even make sure the door was properly closed before he peeled off into the night, speeding down the empty streets. Glancing back in the rearview mirror, Dean saw two sets of white eyes standing in the street far behind.

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“That bitch was really creepy.” Dean said as he used his chopsticks to eat a piece of chicken.

“The dude I got was weird too. Ain’t nothing normal around here I guess.” She grumbled as she ashed her cigarette and Dean took a sip of his beer.

The two had gotten home, and pulled the car into the garage and unloaded the groceries in silence.  The two took a much needed shower, and Dean saw her putting her hair into four large braids before slipping on a silk bonnet.

Then, after doing the usual nightly routine of locking all the doors and windows, the two were sat in the living room eating dinner while the TV played the weather in the back. A silver hatchet sat next to Dean as he flipped through a book in front of him that was on the coffee table. Next to the huntress's food, was a gun loaded with silver bullets. The two had been reading through the lore now, and realized they had encountered two shape shifters with terrible social skills.

“God, you want one normal night and here come the bums to ruin everything.” She scoffed, taking a drag of her cigarette and blowing out the smoke. She finished eating and opened up her spring rolls, taking a bite out of one before she lifted the book off the table. Folding her legs over the arms of her recliner, she pulled the book into her lap and sighed. Salem once again jumped onto her lap, she pressed a kiss to his forehead and the cat purred, nuzzling his head into his owner. 

“Well, we take care of those two, and you can have all the normal nights you want until the next bottom feeders roll in.” Dean’s green eyes scanned over the page. His brain was unable to focus, feeling fried from all the reading.

“Says here they tend to live in packs.” Read off the young woman but she frowned. Now she had to hunt a pack. Fun. Dean had his own thing, he wouldn’t have time to help her hunt a whole pack. First skinwalkers, and now their freaky ass cousins. With an aggressive sigh, she slammed the book shut and threw it on the floor. It landed with a thud on the rug and she crossed her arms over her chest.

“Aw, don’t pout.” Mocking laughter added to her annoyance. Dean watched her flick her crumbs off her fingers at him. He took his final sip of beer and finished off his first one of the night. He let out a belch with his eyes flickering to her plump lips drinking from the bottle. He shoved a piece of chicken into his mouth and he grinned at her. 

“Let’s look into your ghost guy now.” Dean groaned remembering his own hunt. Son of a bitch, he forgot all about that.

“Ghost AND shape shifters? You should consider moving.” Folding his hands he leaned back against the couch.

“Haha. Come on, I’ll go on my hunt tomorrow, you’ll go on yours and we’ll see each other soon enough.” Dean wasn’t sure when she got up and retrieved her book. But there she was standing over his sitting form with Salem in her hand like he was a baby. Pushing the book into his chest with her free hand, Dean let out a groan of exasperation. 

“Read the book!” She scolded as he began to playfully fight her on the couch. Salem jumped free and Dean took the chance to grab her arms and swing her into his lap.

“No! Read it to me, like a bedtime story.” He pulled her body into his with brute strength and she squealed. 

“Dean no, I have to do my own research!” She was laughing but Dean knew she was right. He rested his chin in the crook of her neck and let out a low grunt. The silk of her bonnet tickling his forehead.

Suddenly the world and his heart beat slowed, and time stopped as they made eye contact. His skin felt warm from the weight of her sitting on him he could notice every little thing. Her breath seemed to hitch, and her eyelashes fluttered.

Dean wanted to slowly, ever so slowly, bring her closer and plant a tender kiss on her lips. It was like this force existed between them, pulling them closer and closer together with each passing second. A The pull felt like it came right from his chest and his eyes wanted to flutter shut on their own for a deep kiss.

Would she hold his face in her hands while he held her hips? Would she turn her body to face his, and place her legs on the side of his? How would she kiss him, slowly? Then, she'd push up against him, and they'd refuse to part for air until totally necessary. His hands would find her thighs and squeeze the soft, doughy flesh and maybe she'd let out a small whimper while he pressed kisses down her neck. Down the front, deeply inhaling her scent and feeling her shudder lightly.

How did they go from playing to suddenly being sucked into their own little world? And how could Dean ever be expected to leave?

She tore her eyes away first and brought her attention back to the book. Right, the book. And the rest of the world. Blinking, Dean was able to clear his mind even if just for two seconds.

Someone had to take care of the two shapeshifters they had encountered tonight as well as the ghost. As much as Dean wanted to kill them himself or even wished he took the chance to fight while he was still in the store, he didn’t. Now he’d probably return to an empty home while she cleared out the shapeshifters.

“Ooorrrr we can go back to the store tonight, kill the shapeshifters, and then tomorrow you can give me that moral support from the car!” He suggested, burying his face in her neck. She rolled her eyes playfully. He should’ve known she wasn’t going to head back out. The  minute they came in she ushered him into the shower, complaining that he smelt like outside and 7-Eleven. She was comfortable in her pajamas and slippers.

“Or, since you’ll miss me so much we can clear out the shifters tomorrow, and then we go do the ghost thing.” Dean’s eyes lit up like it was Christmas. Of course! It was genius! Start up here, catch the two and find their pack if  they were with a pack. In that case, Dean would have to stay and handle them and he’d get to stay with her. If not they’d drive down to Baltimore and get the ghost! Either way they stayed together, it was perfect.

“Of course I’ll help you out sweet heart.” She scoffed and placed her cigarette in his mouth. Taking a drag he exhaled and gave her a toothy grin.

“Okay, let’s head to bed. I leave early for my hunts.” Dean protested as she shut off the TV. When she said early, she without a doubt always meant early. He knows because he remembers the last time everyone was together, and she woke up at 4:30 with her mom for their own hunt and the two were back in time for lunch.

And she stayed true to her word. It was 4:30 when Dean woke up to her rising out the bed, wiggling out of his tight grasp. The two hunters were now in the car, loaded with everything needed to kill a ghost, a shifter, some tupperware containers with lunch (some curry chicken and white rice and he felt honored knowing she remembered his favorite dish of hers) and 4 beers in a cooler. Dean drove silently, the Sun rising as they made their way back to the 7-eleven. At least Dean knew it would be quick. She never had time to converse on her hunts, always preferring to just aim, kill and go back home. Dean could do the interrogating of the other shapeshifter at the food shop. 

“If they aren’t here, I’m gonna give up.” Whispered the girl. Even though it was still incredibly early in the morning, she still looked perfect. Her brown eyes had slight bags under them and she was fidgeting with the ends of the two large braids she neatly plaited her hair into. Her cargo pants slightly twisted around her body and she quickly adjusted them. Pulling up to their location, Dean watched as she pulled out her gun and handed Dean his hatchet.

“You think you’ll need backup?”

“No, a silver bullet and he won’t put up a fight.” Dean found it sexy when she talked like that, all determined and smart. He watched her with a crooked smile and he wet his lips with his tongue. Green eyes scanned her curved figure like they were the last thing they’d ever see. Dean would be very pleased if she was the last thing he ever saw.

“In and out.” He nodded back, feeling the fire pump through his blood that he always got before a hunt. That thrill would never leave Dean, as sick as it was. He was about to do some good, save some lives, and take a few in the process. He watched her cock her gun, as she walked towards the Chinese restaurant and he adjusted his grip on the hatchet, entering the convenience store. Maybe he’d get a slushy on his way out.

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Notes:

And that's part two, I hope you're all enjoying this story so far! Also, weird fact, the title of this was originally 'Apple Pie and Cigarettes' but I kept thinking of Apple Jack from MLP for some reason? It was so weird, cuz I watched that show like 1000s years ago when I was little and I hardly watched it but thats a tiny part of why I changed the title. But part of me really wants to change it back, I liked that title.

Its a way for me to show that Dean and the reader aren't burdened by the weight of the world together, they don't have any expectations together. They can just enjoy themselves with the simple things. They aren't these big serious hunters when their together, their just a normal couple enjoy their vices at the end of the day. Anyways, I'm still considering it <3

Also please let me know if you want to be added to my Dean Winchester taglist or this series taglist in the notes <3

Dean Winchester Taglist:

@roseblue373

@titty-teetee

[crazylittlejester]

since it’s almost Hyrule Warriors anniversary…do you have any lttc warriors facts you’d like to share 🤲 also I’m going to draw him as part of my drawing links from different links meets thing I do for each game’s anniversary. It will happen I promise you so uh. idk if you have additional facial descriptors for him that you left in the other posts 🤲 but I’m pretty sure I can draw him accurately enough with the information already provided 👍 anyways, hope you have a good rest of your day!

OH BOY A CHANCE TO YAP ABOUT MY BLORBO!!!!!!

- Zelda keeps trying to promote him and he keeps refusing and she’s so frustrated by it, but he refuses to accept a promotion for something he doesn’t believe he accomplished

- He genuinely thinks he’s so sneaky with the lifts he has in his boots, he’s genuinely convinced no one knows

- Proxi can acknowledge how much he’s grown, but she still sees him as her wet cat son who just desperately needed someone to look out for him. She’s very proud of him, but she still thinks he’s ridiculous

- It took him a hot minute to become fluent enough in ‘hyrulian common’ (english) to be able to understand fast conversations with slang in them and to be able to speak back and converse with other soldiers at that level because it’s not his first language (this is why he sometimes stares at people with an incredibly blank expression during the war, he doesn’t always understand what they’re saying). Proxi continued to speak on his behalf until he’d perfected a castle town accent as well because he didn’t want anyone knowing he didn’t grow up within Hyrule kingdom

-Regularly abuses the fact that the general public has a certain image of him in their minds, and when he does not meet that image he can literally walk around wherever the hell he wants without being recognized and it’s so good for his mental health. He’s still paranoid and worried, but people just don’t recognize him because they hear all the tales of a strong, confident young man and Warriors is actually fairly quiet and comes off as a bit shy, plus people just aren’t expecting the hero to randomly be walking around on his own. Without the make up, fancy clothes, and boots and all that, he can just walk around markets like a normal person, and without the green tunic, Mask can too. So he’d pretty regularly just take Mask around towns to buy sweet treats and they both got to experience what it might’ve been like for an eighteen year old to shop with his little brother

- During the war, he and Ravio got quite close. They’re a dangerous combination and make each other worse

- He and his Zelda are incredibly close, they’re extremely good friends and they like to get together every so often and just YAP

also for any additional descriptors: LTTC Wars looks pretty much exactly like how I headcanon LU Wars. He was deadass created from You’re A Part Of Me Wars when I one day sat back and went “oh my god at this point I’ve just made my own guy-” the main difference between LTTC Wars and You’re A Part Of Me Wars is that LTTC Wars grew up outside of Hyrule Kingdom surrounded by a different culture and he struggled a lot more with a language barrier when he went to Castle Town (while my version of LU Wars grew up IN Hyrule Kingdom and had to struggle with learning his mom’s side of the family’s culture while being unable to fully interact with it), and a few details of the war. But physically they’re the same guy, so my pfp pic could be used as an additional ref if you needed :) THANK YOU FOR DRAWING MY GUY I LOVE HIM VERY MUCH

i love to stick lttc wars and you’re a part of me wars in a room and see what happens, they’d both hate it but I think theyd have so much to say

[gasha40k]

At long last! It’s been a while since my last post, although I’m sure I could probably start every post by saying that. Warhammer has taken a back-burner position in my life for the past few months. I haven’t played a game of 40k since October! If I’m honest, this is primarily because of money. I’ll spare everyone the rant and say that 40k’s prohibitively expensive nature has become, well, prohibiting, I guess. But that being said, the fixation always returns. And return it has! In the last however-many-months since my last post, I’ve spent most of my 40k time playing Kill Team and avoiding finishing my reading of Angron: The Red Angel, but I’ve done a little bit of fun stuff on the side that I’d like to share.

First time using colored primer went pretty well! Certainly saved me a lot of time and Mephiston Red paint

Angron is progressing! Since my last post I’ve primed him and most of his subassemblies. I’m painting him sort of in half, with his left arm and wing detached, as well as his bronze armor plating. I’m doing this so that I can get in and color the backsides of his wings properly.

This guy has been a big challenge so far. A model this large is both imposing and resource-intensive, and I’ve done literally no painting as of recent, so I’m likely not going to finish him for a long while, but I’m excited for when I eventually do.

Formerly known as Urayen’s Reavers, the Eclipse Cavaliers are a band of opportunistic Aeldari Corsairs who all seek one thing and one thing alone: profit

Moving on. As I mentioned previously, I started playing Kill Team this year, and I gotta say, KT fucking rocks! The rules are super approachable and the small scale of the game allows for much more focused and cinematic battles. It’s also a lot quicker, which makes it much easier to get pickup games in, which means I can actually play some 40k sometimes nowadays.

These xenos boys are known as the Eclipse Cavaliers. They’re a band of scumbag Corsairs and my squad of choice. I’ve written a lot of backstory for these boys so as to texture my games a bit more for myself, so I’m gonna put all that stuff in another post where I can talk about these characters in a bit more detail.

The 2nd Company is lead by the boisterous Captain Zaraf Gorfried Redfale. They specialize in the utilization of heavy war implements, such as Gravis armor, tanks, and artillery vehicles

Now that we’re onto more conceptual subject matter, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about how the Thunderbearers actually function as a Chapter. Each Company of the Thunderbearers controls a massive warfleet—much larger than the average fleet of most Successor Chapters—and acts as a semi-autonomous fighting force in and of itself, with the ability to prosecute independent campaigns so long as they remain aligned and in accordance with the Chapter as a whole. The 1st Company is functionally the “core” of the Chapter, made up of the Chapter’s command fleet, veteran company, and portions of the 10th.

The 2nd Company is technically the first of the Chapter’s autonomous fighting forces, and they’re also the only Company for which I own a Captain (the big Gravis fucker who I show off pretty often). The 2nd Company’s culture can largely be sourced to that of a feudal desert world known as Manticore. As the 2nd Company makes up a good amount of the Chapter’s infantry regiments, I felt it necessary to give them their own heraldry.

The special heraldry on their armor pays respect to Manticore in a few different ways. First and foremost, the red armor is a visual homage to the cold, crimson dunes that cover Manticore, but secondarily, it is a holdover tradition that comes from Manticoran warrior culture, wherein it was standard practice to color one’s armor with any number of red pigments so as to camouflage themselves in the dunes. Over time, different colorations of red grew to signify different things, with the 2nd Company’s crimson and gold coming to represent wealth and nobility.

I think that having a squad or two with a splash of red will really make my Space Marines pop out a little bit, and will definitely add some variation into my annoyingly uniform army. I’m thinking of doing little streaks of red on a few of the vehicles, as well, which will make them stand out too.

Speaking of vehicles, the Thunderbearers have received some reinforcements!

This is a Ballistus Dreadnought that I got my hands on through a friend of mine who was selling his Astartes. I kitbashed him a little but tried not to overdo it with the baubles, since my Redemptor is a bit of a piece. Design-wise, I tried to make this a sort of “Primaris update” of one of my first models, Big Harold.

The Aurum Eternatus, one of the Chapter’s most sanctified relics, is a Venerable Dreadnought whose chassis contains the body of the previous fallen Chapter-Master

The thing that I like the most about the Venerable Dreadnought is the ornate look to it. It’s got a lot of trim and fancy panels everywhere and kind of looks like a church-mech.

This aesthetic choice is most noticeable in the lascannon, in my opinion. Combined with the gold trim, the cool indented archway designs on the side panel of the las sorta gives “Gothic castle wall.”

While I couldn’t really replicate the trim, I did use a bunch of bits from the Venerable Dreadnought kit to up the Gothic factor. There’s also a noticeable lack of purity seals on Big Harold, which was something that I absolutely had to remedy. There’s 7 seals! Now we’ve got a proper 7-times blessed Primaris-scale lascannon to snipe tanks with.

Harold has sort of fallen out of use in my lists recently because, uh, Venerable Dreadnoughts do not exist anymore. Awesome! The older Dreads just aren’t as good as Redemptors as well, so Harold has sort of retired to a more ritualistic position on the Chapter.

In his stead, though, we’ve got quite a few new additions to the army alongside our Ballistus. Not included here is another drop pod and a bunch of new infantry units.

Sternguard Veterans of the Thunderbearers 1st Company

Here’s one of ‘em! This is my first squad of Sternguard Veterans, but I’m in the process of building another. Like the Ballistus, these dudes are as of yet unnamed, but I like them quite a bit! To be critical, though, I think I overdid it with some of the bits, but I’m sure the silhouettes will look less obnoxious once they’re all painted and voluminous.

My favorite of the bunch is probably the Veteran Sergeant. His heroic pose and classic bits give “default Space Marine.” And the Veteran on the left is using a bit of a unique shoulder pad that may or may not be a cleansed and sanctified Chaos relic, which may or may not be a common practice in the Thunderbearers Reclusiam Cataegis.

Next post will include the Eclipse Cavaliers and a new Thunderbearers character guy.

[sufferu]

oh god Tensura has that power too?

Lmao

Tensura is…interesting, because I swear I haven’t seen anyone else talking about this, and for all I know it’s got a completely different explanation that I just don’t have the necessary context to make sense of, but like it GENUINELY jumpscared me when I watched the movie Scarlet Bond.

I wanna preface this just by making it clear that these are my own observations and I��m not trying to start a fight, because there’s every chance that I’m missing something really important here. And I also am not writing a formal essay, either — these are just my informal, honest thoughts about what I saw (especially as an academic who happened to have been studying fascist propaganda at the time I watched this movie). Take this with a grain of salt, especially because I’ve actually never seen anyone else mention this aspect of the movie or the anime. But also…I don’t think I imagined this?

Content Warning: antisemitism

Okay, so, the main villain of Scarlet Bond is Lacua who is 1) a greedy, scheming merchant, 2) heavily connected to gold and a plan to steal the gold of the kingdom of Raja, 3) part of an underground cabal that aims to control and corrupt the kingdom of Raja, ruled by the pure-hearted Queen Towa, 4) literally poisoning said kingdom from within via its water supply, 5) literally feeding off of the life force of said pure-hearted queen and planning to steal away her body in an effort to raise his status, and 6) secretly an actual demon.

And to top it all of, Lacua looks like THIS:

…Look, I’m not going to sit here and say that Tensura Slime is absolutely antisemitic propaganda. For one thing: I don’t know how antisemitic sentiments actually translate in Japanese culture, OR how the tropes above would translate to a Japanese audience. There’s every possibility that I don’t have all the information here, and I don’t want to make serious accusations if I’m not sure about it, ESPECIALLY when it seems like I’m the only one who saw it like this. —But from the perspective of a Westerner, and as a Westerner who has actually dedicated a good deal of time to the academic study of fascist propaganda, I mean: you can see why I might have found something like that a bit shocking, right??

And then from there, I couldn’t help thinking about this Very Shocking plot development within the context of the show itself, and suddenly a LOT of stuff got recontextualized in not-so-great ways. Like, 1) the main villains being an underground cabal aiming to control the world from the shadows, 2) the trend of victims of violent offenses (that often killed all their loved ones) forgiving and befriending the aggressors because the aggressors are Actually Alright People (like with the goblins and the Tempest Wolves or the kirin and the orcs), 3) Shizu coming from World War II-era Japan and having a whole conversation with Rimuru about the destruction waged against Japan and how Japan has since come back better than ever (which now I realized did nothing to acknowledge Japan’s role in the war, which had been acceptable BEFORE because Shizu was just a civilian — but then LACUA became a thing to take into account, and suddenly what side Japan took against Third Reich Germany was kind of important), 4) the fact that whenever the monsters get names and “evolve” they become more traditionally attractive in order to demonstrate their superiority to their previous forms, and even 5) the general vibe of the story being very conflict-averse, which I had already thought was a flaw, but I hadn’t considered it in the context of how the trends of German movies (with Germany and Japan being allies) at the height of the war had SPECIFICALLY aimed to be lighthearted and with very clear good guys and bad guys in order to pacify the public. (Hell, even the title “That Time I Got Reincarnated As A Slime” takes on a bit of a different tone when you realize that there was a HUGE trend in Third Reich Germany of stories being framed as flashbacks (long story).)

Anyway, literally nobody else seems to have said anything about this, and as stated above I likely don’t have all the information here — for fuck’s sake I started comparing this piece of Japanese media to old GERMAN movies, who knows how fair or accurate THAT is — so I’m giving the author the benefit of the doubt. Hell, maybe I only noticed it because I happened to be doing a serious academic deep dive into the propaganda of the Third Reich at the time of watching the film, and otherwise wouldn’t have given it a second glance. But like…I REALLY don’t think I imagined this?

To conclude: imagine the kind of whiplash I felt that night when I came home after a long day of studying the history of antisemitic propaganda, opened up Tensura Slime expecting some lighthearted fun in a rather conflict-averse story about a powerful slime making friends and forming alliances — and got slapped in the face with what sure fucking LOOKED like what I had just decided to take a break from studying with absolutely no warning lmao. It was certainly an experience.

[duffmckagans]

So, Kelsey.

I’ve been trying to keep up with tumblr a bit more lately, but I’m still pretty sporadic with it. So correct me if I’m wrong, but am I to understand you’re rewriting the Love Letters books from scratch? And if so, I cannot contain my excitement. Details, please. 😆👏🏼

🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

Tell me, please. Am I going to have to redownload Wattpad lol? 😂

I have missed Val and Jill TERRIBLY.

so, shells.

i totally understand. i think i ghosted tumblr, like 7 months of out of 12 of them last year. i'm really only back on it with regularity for the past week or two now that i've kinda gotten my spark back. i hope to see you here more often!

but i can also super easily clear up your question here and say yes! i really don't know why i'm doing this, considering i have another book to be working on and big plans for school, but here we are. 2025 is my year of writing for fun again after my very bad 2024. and, in this case, my writing for fun means melodramatic rpf that i take too close to heart. my other book is so heavy and close to my actual life anyway, so i'm letting that one cook in my head as i finish up some law school admissions stuff.

sooo details. essentially, yes, i'm starting from the beginning. while people will have read a version of this story already, i figured some people who weren't here in the beginning last time might have fun experiencing it from the top with me. also, like, i need time to catch up and write the other stuff. i'm working in advance as always and have 31.5/40 chapters of rocket queen re-written, so that should keep people entertained a while. i've said this a few other places, but the story is pretty identical to the original in most regards, except there's some pretty substantial growth given to characters/storylines, i've added a few scenes, taken away a few scenes (aka useless ones that got folded into others), and overall just approached it with the brain of a 22-year-old that's been through it instead of an 18-year-old who hasn't. i feel like the drama is even more heightened this time for some reason, except it's not exactly catty? and more just like cognizant of the fact that this book is just fucked up situation after fucked up situation. i'll probably jump off a bridge if people start taking sides or pull that #team[insert name] here again, but that's a bridge to cross when i get there. i've tried to put up some form of guardrails against petty inbox wars, etc, bc i do not want to put up with that! again.

later books, i should also say, will have a few more substantial differences, one comes to mind that i will not be saying, but in general, same schtick. valerie and axl in their own world, jill and izzy on and off every ten days, izzy and axl exerting psychological warfare on each other for hundreds of thousands of words, and general mischief, debauchery, and other behaviors likely listed in the dsm-5.

more details. i plan to start posting on the 22nd of january. it'll be once a week, every wednesday, as per usual. chapters may be a bit shorter than people remember, but i can assure you it is to the benefit of literally everybody. it means you're not reading the same point reiterated 10x. everything is cleaner, tighter, and better. i will happily be here every week to answer any questions, comments, or concerns (excited about this), and i'll be posting on both wattpad and ao3, so if you don't want to go through the hassle of redownloading wattpad (so real), you're more than welcome to read on ao3! i've found it's just a matter of reader preference. i've always been an ao3 girl, but wattpad is certainly a bit more interactive for people who like to comment, etc. also you get the fun perk of seeing the book cover.

but, anyway, yes, join me over here again!! i'm dragging everybody who will come with me down into this pit because that's apparently what we were all lacking from life: gnr fanfic 😌

[gatormeister]

Gundam SEED Destiny Started!

Okay, first impressions. Good opening, not good enough for me to want to listen through it every episode like SEED’s first opening. Gruesome first episode, SEED does not often go into detail with its violence, but when it does it is shockingly gorey for the kind of show it is. IBO is more brutal more often for reference, but you very rarely see what actually happens to a person’s body there. Here we end up seeing bloody corpses and a severed hand and it works well to establish motivation for Shinn and a demonstration of just how awful war is for people.

Then we’ve got our not cyber newtypes who I am hoping will get better characterization than the not cyber newtypes of the previous series. They’re fine, but you don’t get to know much about them in the first three episodes. I like their designs and their Gundams. Really could have done without a “cop a feel on accident” trope. It wasn’t funny and it didn’t add anything to the show.

I already had Neo Roanoke’s identity spoiled, but wow are they not even trying to hide who he is. My only question is why is he doing any of this? It feels like something very out of character, so I can only assume something else is going on to lead to him going along with any of that.

I am so glad Athrun’s just not being allowed to get away with hiding who he is. Guy didn’t even grow his hair out and start wearing sunglasses. As for our other familiar face, Cagalli comes off as being somewhat out of her depth as a political figure which makes sense since she’s what? Just 18? And acting as a representative of an entire nation. It can lend itself to some good character growth and moments with Shinn if handled right.

The new chairman of ZAFT came off as at least somewhat genuine in the first episode and most of the second, but now he’s getting all the “oh no I’m sus” music queues. If he ends up being some sorta manipulative mastermind that’d be pretty disappointing since ZAFT having seemingly had most of its leadership killed off in the last show is actually in a pretty good position to be written as a more sympathetic group for this show.

Now for mobile suits, I like the impulse more than the Strike, and the Gaia, Chaos, and Abyss are just much better than the Calamity, Raider, and Forbidden Gundams. I like the Impulse’s multiple packs a lot more than the Strike’s thanks to the mobile suit colors changing to compliment the pack this go around. I do imagine that made its Gunpla a lot less readily customizable since it’d need multiple colors of the same parts to be show accurate.

As for the Zakus… I absolutely love their designs, I think all of SEED’s explicit redesigns of the Zeon mobile suits are fantastic and look incredible they’re my favorite designs in both shows. But why are they being used for an AU? Part of why the AUs are great is how they all have their own unique senses of style and designs, and the GINN was a perfect design that could call back to everyone’s favorite mono eyed army while still feeling unique to the Cosmic Era shows. Being so explicit as to have literal Zakus just takes some of that unique charm away if only in a small way.

All that said, I hope I end up enjoying this show. I like these first three episodes. They aren’t as strong a beginning as SEEDs, but it’s still good. I’d be lying if I said there wasn’t a worry in the back of my mind about the stigma behind the show, but the only way I can figure out if I’ll continue to enjoy it is if I keep watching, so that’s what I’ll do.

[ladylooch]

Letters in Your Last Name - Chapter 32

A/N: Wrote this chapter in 20 minutes. You never forget the little wins like that 🥰

Word Count: 4.1k

Warnings: SMUT 18 + Content, smidge of child birth- less dramatic than last time hehe.

Airplane seats were not made for women who are close to 7 months pregnant. That much is certain as I settle in to our first class seat, adjusting my hips so the baby settles into a better position. Although at this stage in pregnancy, there isn’t many “good” positions left. My husband plops down into the seat next to me with a huff. He’s been huffing and puffing all morning, but I refuse to let him blow down my vacation buzz. We are currently on our way to the Hilton Los Cabo resort for an extremely rare and short, season break.

“I can’t believe I let you talk me into this.” Kevin grumbles from beside me.

“It’s fine.” I say to him, not looking up from my book. It’s a historical fiction about a few badass women helping the Allies get an edge in World War II.

“I am literally going to lose my shit if you give birth in Mexico.”

“I’m not. I’m giving birth on January 3rd.” I say to him, reminding him of my already scheduled cesarean appointment. With Luca being an emergency c-section, our doctor recommended leaning towards delivering this way again. It’s technically possible to do so naturally after one these days, but we opted to pencil in the delivery of our next child. Ya know, for easy planning.

“Yeah, if you don’t go into labor first.” He snaps at me. I sigh and drop my book, looking at my husband.

“I’m over this attitude.” I swirl my hand in a circle at him. “You’re acting like I made you buy these tickets, pack your bags, get into the car, drop Luca at my parents, go through the airport, and get on this plane, all with your balls in a vice.” My ensuing look is pointed at him. He purses his lips at me and shakes his head looking away. “Choices, baby, have consequences like unprotected sex.” I rub my hand over my belly. “And the doctor cleared me yesterday to do this, so quit getting your panties in a bunch. Mama needs a vacation and to not watch The Little Mermaid for a few days.”

“Would you two like something to drink before takeoff?” The flight attendant interrupts Kevin’s response.

“Vodka?” Kevin asks and I click my tongue at him.

“How about sparkling water? For both of us. With limes, please.” I narrow my eyes at my husband.

“I need a drink, Sam. I’m seriously concerned that we are going to get to 30,000 feet and your water is going to break.”

“Kevin. I’m pregnant, you’re not. Our daughter is sitting on my bladder right now, not yours. So your feelings are invalid. Now, shut up.” I hiss at him. The flight attendant gives me a knowing look and stifles a giggle.

“Sparkling water with a lime wedge it is.” She winks at me.

“Jesus take the wheel.” He mutters under his breath.

“You’ll be meeting Jesus soon if you don’t shape up.” I tell him as I flip my book back open. I can sense Kevin’s gaze on me, but he wises up and keeps his mouth shut until our plane lands in Baja California. The exhale that comes out of his mouth makes me smile when our eyes meet.

“I could be really mean right now, but I won’t.”

“Don’t even pretend.” He shakes his head at me with a nervous laugh. He leans forward and kisses me gently. His hand comes to my belly and pushes against our daughter.

We make it to the resort and onto the beach in under an hour. Kevin immediately dives into the ocean. I’m thankful for a break from his constant check ins. I settle into a chair with my book again, glancing every so often at my husband to make sure he keeps popping his head above the surface. It isn’t long before he’s emerging from the water, rippling muscles covered with droplets racing down them. I moan and bite my lip at his approach. He reaches for his towel on the lounge chair next to me, wiping his body off and studying me.

“You’re getting red. You need more sunscreen.” He completely misses my invitation. Instead, he reaches into our beach bag for the baby sunblock we brought from the room. “Maybe we should get another umbrella over here for you.” He extends his hand to me with the bottle. “Also, I haven’t seen you drink enough water today.” My eye twitches at the last sentence. I release a heavy sigh and put my book down. He is killing me. At this rate, I won’t be enjoying more than five minutes of this vacation.

“Kevin. Baby, I love you so much, but you are getting on my last damn nerve.” I say to him, flipping my sunglass up so he can see the annoyance in my green eyes. “You have been concerned about this pregnancy since the day you saw her on the ultrasound and it is getting to be too much. Your girls are fine. Relax.”

“Sorry I love you two.” Defensiveness drips from his tone.

“I know you love us, but you’re smothering us. And I’ve asked you to stop multiple times.”

“Us?” He questions with a wrinkle of his nose.

“Yes! Us! Lacey told me she wants to enjoy this vacation without your fussing!” The sound of our daughter’s name makes Kevin’s frustration ease. I flick my sunglasses back down onto my nose. “If you need a task, go get me something to drink that isn’t water.” My tone is pointed and a reminder for him to mind his damn business about what I put into my body.

“Well… what do you want?” He asks me, grabbing his shirt and pulling it back over his large shoulders. He buttons one button to keep it together and stands.

“Surprise me.” I mumble without looking up from my book. Kevin hovers for another moment before slumping off to find a drink hut. When he is gone from ear shot I release another heavy sigh. He is so intense these days. This entire pregnancy really. He was not like this with Luca, but something about this one has him going a little crazy. Maybe it’s because of how difficult it was to conceive her. Maybe it’s because its our first daughter. I don’t know. All I know is if he’s like this now, what will he do when Lacey is out in this scary world?

“He will take care of you, sweetheart.” I murmur to our daughter. I press into where she’s resting and close my eyes. “You’re lucky to have him as your daddy. He’s a good man.” I assure her, rubbing a few tight circles over her on my stomach. A shadow casts over me. It’s my husband, standing above me with a grin.

“I heard that.”

“Good.” I say, reaching for the pink drink he extends adorned with a blue umbrella. “What is this?”

“Virgin Sex on the Beach. Didn’t think there was such a thing.” His eyes deepen before he glances over his shoulder, seeing how much privacy we have.

“I’m not having sex with you in the sand.” I say immediately as I take the glass from him. I know where he is trying to go with this. Luckily, his overprotectiveness has never applied to our sex life. “It takes forever to get out of the vag.”

“Damn it.” He groans. “Wait, how do you know that? We haven’t had sex on a beach.” I purse my lips around the straw and slide my gaze away.

“Samantha.” He tisks at me.

“Spring break. Pensacola Beach. Freshman year in college. It wasn’t that good because of said sand.” I shrug at him, settling back into my chaise. Kevin gives me a sour look. “Oh stop. It was with my boyfriend at the time. Tell me more about having your own apartment at 17.” His face immediately breaks out into a smile.

“Those were good days.”

“Fucker.” I narrow my eyes at him, sucking up the delicious juice through my red straw. “Just remember, Kevin. When you think back on those fond memories with your puck bunnies, your daughter will be 17 some day. You better pray that she doesn’t have an encounter with 17 year old you.” The smile immediately drops from Kevin’s face and he looks out across the tumultuous surface of the ocean, hopefully contemplating his poor life choices before me.

“I don’t need to think about those days when I get to wake up next to you every morning.” His gaze travels back to mine. I feel my eyes pinch behind my sunglasses. I reach out for his left hand and slide my thumb across his wedding band. His fingers lace around mine and he brings the back of my hand up to his lips.

“You’re good.” I compliment him.

“I know.” He laughs at me. “Baby, your cheeks are getting really red.” He says gently. “Let’s go up to the pool. There is more shade there.”

“Okay.” I concede, closing my book and tossing it into our bag.

Kevin gathers the rest of our stuff and we make our way up the stairs to the infinity pool. Surprisingly, its relatively empty besides one other couple who are obviously asleep in chaises beneath their cabana. We set our stuff down at two chairs across the pool from them before heading over to the entrance. Kevin jumps into the pool, deciding to forgo the traditional route of stairs. I leisurely walk down into the pool as Kevin drops below the surface of the water again. He stays under for a few moments before he crashes back up, looking at me while pushing his hair back from his face.

“I think in another life you were a fish.” I tease him as he swims over to me.

“I was definitely a shark.” His teeth snap playfully at me. He crouches down and gathers me into his arms, beginning to walk us both back into deeper water. “I’m sorry. I know I’m smothering you, but I can’t seem to stop. From the moment they said girl at the 20 week appointment, my chest has been tight with worry.” He confesses to me, as he continues to wade deeper into the pool. I sigh as the water wraps around my belly and up my breasts. I can feel the pressure of pregnancy releasing off my organs as we float in the warm water.

“S’okay. She’s safe in me.” I mumbled to him, resting my head against his shoulder. Being weightless in his arms and the extra exposure of the sun has my eye lids drooping peacefully.

“Do you want to go back to the room for a nap?” He asks me after a few more minutes of floating around.

“In a little bit. The water is holding her weight and it feels good.”

“Okay.” He murmurs to me. “You know what I’m thinking about right now?”

“The pool in Sweden?” I giggle to him without opening my eyes.

“I haven’t been in a pool since then when I haven’t thought of that.”

“Same.”

He rests his head against mine and water from his wet hair beads down my throat. My hand winds up his neck to the base of his head and I tangle my fingers through his wet locks. Kevin sighs and leans into my fingers. I smile against his shoulder then pucker my lips against his skin. He is warm beneath me and a slight sunburn is starting to bleed through. I open my mouth and take a sliver of his flesh lightly between my teeth. Kevin turns his head to place his lips against my temple.

“Love you.” He whispers to me like a secret the rest of the world isn’t in on. I pull back to look into his face. He’s drowning in adoration as our gazes meet.

“Love you more.” I say to him, pressing our lips together.

“Impossible.” He insists to me.

“Let’s go to bed and we can fight about it there.” I purr against his lips. My tongue traces his bottom lip and he opens his mouth to connect them.

When we get back to our room, Kevin takes me to bed and makes love to me. It’s passionate love making at it’s finest- full of sensual touches and loving caresses that have my pregnancy hormones bouncing in my body. We are both warm from the sun and everywhere our skin touches feels like fire. Afterwards, we rest contently in each others arms. Kevin’s fingers stroke my hair lovingly as our legs tangle together. My lashes flutter against his chest as I struggle to keep my eyes open.

“Go to sleep, baby.” Kevin finally whispers to me before his lips graze my forehead. His words hold the gentle nudge I need. I drift off in moments.

I awaken hours later as the golden light of the setting sun fills our hotel room. I gingerly sit up and wince at the feeling of my hip being asleep. I roll to my back for a moment and rub at the spiky feeling dancing down my leg. I notice Kevin’s absence and turn to look at the balcony that extends from our suite. I see my husband there, laying back in his chair with his head tilted towards the sun. He looks so good. The orange and yellow hues of the sunset bounce off his tan skin and muscular chest.

I carefully roll onto my side and push myself up into a sitting position. I scoot myself off the bed and try not to feel exasperated at how unnecessarily hard that was. My body is working overtime growing a human being. It’s okay if it doesn’t function like it used to before babies. My movement catches Kevin’s eye and he turns to take me in. I’m still naked and his brown eyes devour me. I watch his gaze slide to all his favorite places. A yearning need begins to throb ion my core. I reach for the plush hotel robe on the chair by the door, pulling it on before joining him outside.

“Sit with me.” He reaches for my hand and pulls me into his lap. “You look very beautiful.. and sexy.. and loved..” He says each word around a kiss.

“It’s cause you love me so good.” Kevin’s hands rest on my belly as I talk. We can both feel Lacey moving around at the sound of our voices.

“Pregnancy agrees with you.” Kevin murmurs to me. “You’re like a glowing goddess.”

“You must not have seen me trying to get off the bed just now.” I laugh at him, dropping my forehead to his. I pull back and look at his face again. He looks at me in a way that makes my heart skip a beat.

“You’re perfect.” He says simply. And as I always do, I believe him. “What do you want for dinner?”

“I wish I could have real sushi.” I whine to him. “It would be so good here.”

“I know. I thought about that.” He frowns at me.

“Um.. honestly carne asada tacos sound good. With chips and guac.”

“You got it.” He pats my butt for me to rise. He walks over to his phone and begins to put our order in through the app.

“Oh! Babe! Fried ice cream!” I yell to him and he smiles at me, giving me a thumbs up.

“I already knew you wanted that.” He laughs when he joins me on the balcony after he’s done. “You’ve got my baby in there. She definitely wants ice cream.”

“I’ve never craved sweets more in my life than being pregnant with your children.” I shake my head at him. We grow quiet and look out across the ocean. The ripples of the water are glowing in the fading light. It’s picturesque. Just like the man sitting across from me.

“Oh, while you were sleeping, I called down to the spa and they have a massage therapist here who specializes in prenatal massages. Apparently, she’s from Canada and lives down here during the winter season.”

“What….” My eyes widen at him in excitement. “I want that. Tomorrow.” I nod my head at him.

“Good, cause you’re going. 10am.”

“What if she massages the baby right out of me?”

“You know I don’t think that’s funny.” He rolls his eyes at me. “Plus, Lacey and I talked about it while you were sleeping. She’s agreed to stay in you until we are back home.” I let out a loud snort of a laugh, tilting my head back.

“Wow, she’s already a daddy’s girl.”

A knock at the door stops Kevin from responding. He jogs to grab it and brings our meal out to me on the balcony. My carne asada tacos smell and look so good that my mouth is watering instantly. Kevin got Baja shrimp tacos. We both split the chips and guac and settle with water for drinks after our day in the sun.

“Have you heard from my parents? I thought they would have called at bedtime.” I ask him after my first bite. He nods his head at me, but swallows his food before he speaks.

“Your mom FaceTimed me with Luca while you were sleeping.”

“Dang it.” I frown, tapping Kevin’s phone screen to see the time. It’s well past Luca’s bedtime now. He’s likely been asleep for hours.

“It’s probably good he didn’t see you. He was a little upset. It would have been hard for you.” He gives me a small shrug.

“Yeah, you’re probably right. Did he cry when he saw you?”

“No, but he was going down that road the longer we talked, so I told your mom we should just end the call. She texted me a picture of him five minutes later with your dad reading to him. He was happy and sleepy.”

“Okay. I’ll try to call tomorrow morning and see how it goes.” I pick up a piece of steak with my fingers, chewing it slowly. It melts in my mouth and is bursting with flavors of citrus and salt. “It’s been a little easier than I thought to be away from him.” I admit to Kevin.

“You needed a break.” He acknowledges to me. “You’ve been doing a lot the last few months- growing a baby and chasing a toddler.”

“That’s true. I feel kind of guilty though.” I shrug my shoulders.

“You’re an amazing mom. Every parent needs a break from their kid. It's normal.”

“Yeah, I know that. I just… I kind of feel bad that you have this week off and I took you away from him. Not sure that’s fair to either of you.”

“Babe, we needed to reconnect with each other. Being here together is going to make us better parents for him when we get back.” I nod my head in agreement.

“Yeah, I know you’re right.” I push my plate of half eaten tacos away. At this point in my pregnancy, I get full pretty quickly. But there is always room for dessert. “Where is my ice cream?” I ask him. He laughs and goes into the fridge, grabbing it and placing it in front of me. It’s at a perfect eating consistency and easy to spoon into my mouth.

“Fuck…” I moan out as the first bite slides into my mouth. Kevin’s eyes meet mine and an awareness blankets the balcony. I stick my tongue out of my mouth and lick the remaining ice cream off the back of the spoon. Kevin clears his throat and breaks his gaze away from mine. “I can’t wait to do this to you later.” I whisper to him. His gaze darts back to my eyes. I deliberately run my tongue along each edge of my top teeth while looking into his eyes. Kevin swallows and he releases a quick exhale.

“Just tell me when.” He finally speaks to me. His voice is dripping with obvious arousal. I’m satisfied with his response.

“When I’m done with my ice cream.” Kevin nods his head at my teasing and then smirks. His tongue dances along his bottom lip before he sucks in a corner of it between his teeth. It pops back into place, a little plumper than before. I blink as a wave of involuntary pleasure weaves around my body. My mouth instantly begins to water. It has nothing to do with the ice cream on my spoon.

“Now.” I whimper out to him. He pumps his fist, then picks me up and we fall into bed moments later.

After we take the latest edge off, Kevin spoons me from behind. I lazily run my fingers along his forearm where his hand is resting on my bump.

“I’m glad you made us do this.” He whispers into my ear. His breath makes a few strands of my hair tickle my face. “We feel like us again… Sam and Kevin, not mom and dad.”

I sigh and lean back deeper into his chest. His palm tightens around my bump and our daughter kicks against him.

“We do. And now I’m ready for her to be here.” I murmur to him.

“Me too.” He nuzzles my neck with his nose. “But for now, go get that ice cream you’re obviously still thinking about. Then, I’ll rub your feet.”

“Yay!” I shimmy in excitement and bounce off the bed to the balcony. He laughs and watches me from the bed like a man who hasn’t had enough of his wife.

I reach for my ice cream, not even caring that it’s barely ice cream anymore, and turn with the cup in my hand. I pause there, taking in the view from across the room. Kevin has grabbed the remote for the TV and he flicks through the channels to find something for us to watch. My breath catches in my throat as my eyes trail down his naked body. He’s strong and sexy but most of all he’s sweet. The sweetest man I could have ever asked for to be mine. He absentmindedly brings a hand to his face and he rubs at the days worth of stubble growing there. I could watch him just be, doing normal human things, for hours. My lack of movement draws his eyes to me. The smile that he gives me forces goosebumps to break out down my body. Thank God this man’s baby is in me.

“Holy shit.” I say through bubbling tears in my throat. “I love you. Way more than this ice cream.” At this point in my pregnancy, he’s immune to my hormonal emotions.

“Good. Now, come back to bed.” _ _ _

My eyes are closed when I hear her cry for the first time. Just like with Luca, the overwhelming emotions sweep over me. Kevin’s lips are on my cheek and he grips my hand tightly.

“Are you okay?” He asks me, noting my silence. All I can do is nod.

She’s finally here.

When I open my eyes, I watch intently as they hand Lacey to Kevin to hold. His lips part as he sucks in a surprising breath when he sees her face.

“I’m done for.” He whispers to me. His eyes are filling with tears and I’m a little concerned something is wrong with her. “She looks just like you.” He finally tells me, turning our daughter so I can see her face. He is right. Even through the goop, she’s a Stalock through and through. I beam at him and my eyes match his teary ones.

“She is me.” I confirm to him.

“She is so lucky. So beautiful.” He smiles and brings her down closer to my face. She’s pure perfection. Her eyes are open and she’s looking around at her new surroundings. Her face is beginning to signal a cry, distorting in anguish.

“Mama’s here, Lace.” I whisper to her. She pauses mid-cry at the sound of my voice. Fresh tears leak from my eyes and Kevin reaches to brush them away. “Babe, I want to hold her.”

“Okay.” Kevin murmurs to me, scooting closer with his chair and leaning forward. He gently places Lacey on my chest, helping my arms support her weight in my drugged up haze. I reach for her face and slowly brush the tips of my fingers over her features. Kevin sighs contently next to me as his brown eyes turn to mush while looking at our daughter. He’s head over heels in love with a new girl. And I’m perfectly okay with that.

“What is this sweet girl’s name?” Grace asks as she checks our baby’s heartbeat again. It’s strong and steady, just how we want it.

“Lacey Marie Fiala.” I tell her without taking my eyes from our daughter.

“Vítej na světě, naše dokonalá holka.” Kevin speaks softly in Czech.

Welcome to the world, our perfect girl.

[therealestpodcast]

SPIRIT ARCHIVE: EPISODE ONE SEASON ONE; BLOCKBUSTER HORROR

"NOW WE ARE ONE IN EVERLASTING PEACE WE HOPE THAT YOU CHOKE, THAT YOU CHOKE" - EXIT MUSIC (FOR A FILM); RADIOHEAD

YOU ARE WATCHING EPISODE ONE

CLICK HERE FOR EPISODE TWO

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: IN THE STUDIO

TIME: 7:30 PM

Jae: I'm Jae!

Ona: And I'm Ona!

Jae: And you’re watching The Spirit Archive.

Ona: The Spirit Archive?

Jae: …What?

Ona: The Spirit Archive???

Jae: What the fuck are you talking about now?

Ona: You added “The”.

Jae: Okay??

Ona: It's just Spirit Archive.

Jae: ……

Ona: ….

Jae: ANYWAYS!

Jae: Welcome to the very first episode, this is insane.

Ona: Literally.

Jae: We came so far in the past two in a half years…already have our on TV show.

Ona: It was about time; So Jae Jae on the way way.

Jae: “Jae Jae on the way way”….?

Ona: Explain to the people how this will go!

Jae: Basically you guys send us emails, and we read them, think of our theories, and then investigate the “Haunted” areas.

Ona: Afterwards we come back to the studio, go back over evidence and finally come to our conclusion. You'll see us back here in the studio every so often during the episode giving our opinions on what we thought during the investigation too!

Jae: Sadly, the camera crew cant explore with us.

Ona: I’m gonna miss you Dave…

Jae: So, heres our first letter from… South Park's very own! Ryen Miller!

Jae: Shelly says, “i told craig and kenny about this but they’re being so useless rn so i’m calling the best podcast out there. my friend mimi and i are at the video store i run, hiding behind a shelf of old war movies because there’s an apparition in my stock room. i’m pretty sure it moved to the basement but i’m not sure. advice?”

Ona: That's your fucking fault for not asking the pros first.

Jae: They asked for advice, not for you to start ripping into them.

Ona: They KNEWWW what they we’re doing.

Jae: Oh my goddd, what's your guess Ona?

Ona: To be honestttt, I have no clue, not enough info. What about you Jae Jae on the way way?

Jae: Oh you GOTS to stop.

Jae: My guess is it's a poltergeist spirit.

Ona: Whys that? Those are rare.

Jae: Uh well my guess is that Shelly seems pretty scared, right?

Ona: Okay..

Jae: And it could've knocked things down ya’know? We dont really know how everything first started. we definitely need to ask more details when get there.

Ona: Truuuue, mhhh okay. Well…Are you ready to start? Like this is our first big investigation.

Jae: Ready as I’ll ever be I suppose. Autobots.. roll out.

Ona: Are you dumb..

Ona: Let’s just go.. I can’t stand you right now.

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: IN FRONT OF THE VIDEO STORE

TIME: 5:15 PM

Standing around the outside of the off brand blockbuster-esque store, Jae can't help but wonder why exactly this is the spot for the first episode. The camera crew that were unable to enter behind them so they didn't get in the way standing around, making sure the equipment was all up and running alright.

"Are you not gonna help me with the equipment? Jae? Hellooooo?" Ona complains, holding a duffle bag of things the duo will need for checking out the store.

"It's not even that heavy," Jae responds, grabbing the bag from Ona's hands, "It literally just holds the stuff we need to put on ourselves."

"Okay.... so hold it while I put it on me first, duh!"

Jae turns to look at the camera that's currently recording with a blank stare, but looks back at Ona as she connects the equipment to her, holding a spirit box in one hand and a FLIR digital thermometer in another. She waves at the camera connected to the vest Ona's wearing.

"I look hot as fuck don't I? Don't answer I already know, your turn!" Ona giggles.

Jae puts their own stuff on them and checks their laptop feed to make sure it's working, when everything is set Jae slings a backpack containing other important equipment on their back, picking up an EMF recorder, she turns to Ona, "Ready?"

Ona shakes her head, "No. Is it too late to back out of this? Like what if we... die? Bro I don't know about this."

Jae blinks, once, twice, and a third time, "Girl if you don't get your ass in there."

"Why me first? Do you have some death wish against me?"

"Absolutely. No! Bitch, if I go first you'd probably leave me alone with this spirit to go get McDonalds!" Jae scoffs.

"Oooohh.. I could so go for McDonald's right now actual-"

"GET YOUR ASS IN THERE."

"You got it!" Ona jumps and speed walks into the store with Jae following closely behind her.

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: IN THE STUDIO

TIME: 7:35 PM

Ona: You are so mean to me.

Jae: YOU THREW THIS RUBBER DUCK PENCIL AT ME FOUR SECONDS AGO.

Ona: Why can't we be friends...

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: INSIDE THE VIDEO STORE

TIME: 5:25 PM

"Oh shellyyyyy," Ona sings.

Jae lightly hits the side of her shoulder, "You're probably more scary than the spirit right now."

"We're here!" The duo heard a voice speak up in the back, cautiously walking towards the back, they find themselves staring at Shelly who are huddled in a corner the 'War' movies section.

"Uh... Have you two been here this entire time?" Jae asks

Shelly nods, "Yes! I keep hearing crashing noises in the basement! At first it used to just be the in the stock room but awhile ago it moved to the basement." Shelly explains.

Ona glancing around the room, her eyes shifting the rather dark store, "And you two just sat? In the dark?"

Shelly pipes up, tone shaking, "We think it broke the fuse box! The lights went out like ten minutes ago.. I think."

"Just our luck.." Ona sighs.

"Any other information you can lend us?"

Shelly thinks for a moment, "No.. it's just been throwing things around quite often.. if you wanted I'm sure you could check the stock room and see the absolute mess in there."

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: IN THE STUDIO

TIME: 7:42 PM

Ona: And this is where you confirmed in your head that it was a poltergeist?

Jae: Well, not necessarily, a lot of spirits interact with their environment and often or not manage to throw something around a few times. The distinguishing factor is how many items they throw or how often they mess with the environment around them. They almost always solely mess around with things and they can be dangerous, especially if the items they're throwing around are, but they are more like a nuisance.

Ona: Like a baby!

Jae: Sure, Ona.... like a baby..

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: INSIDE THE VIDEO STORE ; BASEMENT (FIRST ROOM)

TIME: 5:39 PM

Shelly groans holding a camcorder and now equipped with some basic equipment, "How did you get me to agree to do this for you guys again?"

"You agreed to a deal of a 30 year supply of monster, five cents an hour, and early access to merch. Don't come for me here." Jae shrugs.

"Right but like I work here so shouldn't I get to be let FREE? Away from this place and outside in the parking lot? I don't know.. how about not record an episode for you guys?"

Ona rolls her eyes, "Bro, shut up. You're being paid what else do you WANT? You know what? Let me play you a tune on the world's smallest violin."

Ona starts rubbing her thumb and index together, humming a high pitched tune.

"Oh my god get out of my face, Ona." Shelly grumbles.

Before anyone could do anymore talking Jae abruptly stops walking, Ona nearly stumbling into her, "Dude what are you doi-"

"Sh."

Shelly and Ona still.

The basement is quiet and there are no sounds, it's scary and dark and you could probably hear the dust settling around you if it wasn't for the fact Shelly then sneezed extremely loudly.

"Bless you." Jae utters quickly, still scanning the rooms in the basement.

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: IN THE STUDIO

TIME: 7:51 PM

Ona: Shelly sneezing pissed me off.

Jae: Does anything like.. not piss you off?

Ona: Stan Marsh.

Ona: Anyways, what do we know about the video store?

Jae: Well it says it was built in 1952 by Mr and Mrs. Boldswell and it was their pride and joy, it was eventually passed down to their son Harry Boldswell before being renovated by him and sold to a Calvin Checker.

Ona: Can't trust bitches who have the same initial for their first and last name..

Jae: .....

Ona: Would you QUIT with that blank stare at the camera I know you use it to make fun of me.

Jae: Anyhow, Calvin Checker accidentally had three employees killed in the mid 90s when a fire broke out in the room now known as the electricity room located in the basement. It sat vacant after the incident and then another renovation in the late 2000s came after another change of owner, this time to Harry's daughter Lyra owns it, and has been a staple in South Park ever since.

Ona: Any hauntings reported?

Jae: Yeah once, in 2014 a couple who were passing through reported to the manager on duty at the time that there was weird noises coming from the basement and that in the 'Comedy' section a few discs fell onto the ground.

Ona: So why are we going here again..? Like I don't wanna be anywhere near this place.

Jae: Because we got asked to? Ona, do your job oh my god.

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: INSIDE THE VIDEO STORE (BOILER ROOM)

TIME: 5:46 PM

Ona was scared shitless, she was checking out the boiler room all by herself and was nervous for anything to pop out, per Jae's words, the spirit box was a way for communication with the poltergeist to happen. So here she was, asking questions with a camcorder propped behind her surveilling the room, to essentially... an empty room.

Gulping nervously, she asks "Is there anyone that wishes to talk?"

The spirit box ticks away before a random "no" is heard, and Ona frantically looks around the room.

"So..you don't want to talk?"

"Hi."

"Girl make up your mind the fuck? Okay.. if you want to talk.. uhhhm say my name?"

"Yasmine"

Ona scoffs, "Girl I said MY name not yours this is MY show."

"..na"

"I'm sorry what was that?"

"Ona."

"Nuh uh, I'm out this bitch." Ona turns the spirit box off, grabs the camcorder and runs out the room.

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: INSIDE THE VIDEO STORE (STORAGE CLOSET)

TIME: 5:46 PM

Shelly was upset, not only did these two ditch them, but the two also made them do his OWN segment for their OWN show. This was not worth the deal that she made with Jae. Not at all.

Shelly sets the journal Jae gave them onto the ground with a pen beside it and sat there.

"I'm not talking to this thing, it can kiss my ass." Shelly thought, sitting on a chair, camcorder in hand.

Shelly looked around the storage room, it was rather big and hadn't been used recently, gathering from all the dust that lingered. The upstairs storage room was used a lot more often, as it was even bigger considering it used to be the manager's office before sales dwindled and now the manager's office was downsized to a different room.

Shelly thought about dozing off, but quickly shook that idea out of his head when she realized just where he currently was.

'Scratch'

Shelly abruptly sat up, trying to determine the noise they heard.

'Scratch, scratch, scratch, SCRATCH, SCRATCH, SCRATCH'

Shelly stood up and looked around the room before remembering about the empty journal and picks it up, shock evident all over their face when he reads what was on there.

'It hurts' and a bunch of scribbles all over marked the pages. Shelly didn't need to be told twice about anything and immediately ran out the room.

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: INSIDE THE VIDEO STORE (ELECTRICITY CLOSET)

TIME: 5:46 PM

Jae hums as she sets up the cameras around the room. Once the final camera was set she took a look at the set up she had; a few various non life threatening items were scattered about, such as a small pillow, a plastic cup, a tissue box, and an empty Pringles can.

Jae stood in the corner of the room and started calling out, "Oh ghosttttt... are you in here..?"

They could hear running, presumably from Ona and or Shelly, and sighed.

Jae waited a few more minutes in the dark before sighing and moving to start taking down cameras. When they got to the last one, the empty pringles can rolled onto the ground from where it was set, causing her to jump.

They look over their should to glance at the pringle can and just shake their head before turning back to removing the camera. The tissue box then is flung to the side of the wall near Jae's head and they pause taking in account of what just happened.

"Oh." Jae murmurs, "Well that was a dick move."

Jae collects the camera and grabs the items, being careful to not be hit by any of them, but fails because once she turned to grab the pillow, it was picked up by the spirit and flung at their head. Once it hits them on the top of their head, they pause and leave the room rather awkwardly.

"This ghost is a dick." Jae states, heading up the stairs.

CURRENTLY:

LOCATION: IN THE STUDIO

TIME: 8:03 PM

Ona: I'm sorry you called the spirit a dick?

Jae: Well it was... bro did not need to throw the pillow at my head.

Ona: Oh girl you are just asking to be killed by this thing.

Jae: We stream anyways, we don't need to be going there ever again.

Ona: Can't poltergeists like... I don't know.. attach to someone?

Jae: If they can then you should so hit up Di'ona [BLEEP] in South Park, Colorado, she lives i-

Ona: CAN YOU QUIT THAT!!!! I don't need a ghost haunting ME, besides if a spirit is haunting me it's haunting you too idiot.

Jae: What if I want the ghost to haunt me? Wouldn't that be sick? A little spirit buddy.

Ona: NOT A PISSED OFF SPIRIT. Are you dumb?

Jae: Ehh.. Tomato tomato, anyhow the evidence was pretty damning that there was a poltergeist haunting the video store.

Ona: Yeah, sucks Shelly works there, because we have no clue how to get rid of it. That's why our show isn't meant on getting rid of them! Just finding out if you really are being haunted of if it's a fluke.

Jae: Yeah well in South Park I'm not gonna be surprised if all these events we get are going to be turning out to be real.

Ona: True that.

Ona: I'm glad our first episode though was something real you know? Sure I was scared shitless but... we can edit my screams out later right?

Jae: .....

Ona: We're going to edit my screams out. Right. Jaeyoung.

Jae: We're glad you enjoyed this epi-

Ona: HEY! Answer me!

Jae: -sode and we hope you continue supporting us! Thank you for everything and..

Ona: ... Girl you got me fucked up.

Jae and Ona: We can consider this spirit... archived!

YOU ARE WATCHING THE CUT SCENES:

"AHHHH GET ME OUT OF HERE GET ME OUTTTT" Ona screams, frantically running out of the basement and out the door.

"Haun.. haunted definitely haunted." Ona gasps out, "I need a minute."

Shelly soon runs out after Ona, screaming her head off too, "OH FUCK THIS PLACE HELLLLLLL NOOOOOOO."

Shelly stares at the doors anxiously waiting for Jae to come out and soon she does, calmly exiting the video store, "Well? These two are freaked? Anything? Anything at all?"

Jae shrugs, "The spirit is rude as hell."

EPISODE ONE IS OVER WOULD YOU LIKE TO CONTINUE?

YES [SELECTED] NO

SEE YOU IN EPISODE TWO!