#it’s like the dating playbook

[poppyholdingseal]

But is Sauron trying to look more like an elf (more like CELEBORN??) to appeal to Galadriel since Halbrand worked so well on her, why not Blonde Elf Man?

[healingheartdogs]

Men can have vaginas. Women can have penises. Being a lesbian is not about "only liking pussy". Being gay is not about "only liking dick". Those are transphobic and intersex exclusive statements.

The "sex" in "sexuality" is not referring to assigned sex at birth or the most common presentations of assigned sex genitalia. It refers to sexual attraction. Queer sexual attraction is gender and/or shared queer experience based. Gender is not the same as assigned sex at birth or genitalia. If your personal sexual attraction is based on assigned sex at birth and specific genitalia and you use a queer sexuality label you are appropriating that label and participating not only in transphobia and intersex exclusion from queer communities but also in homophobia.

Stop appropriating queer sexualities and then trying to kick out people who actually belong under that label because you want to make a little exclusion based bigot club for yourselves.

[musubiki]

Ok idea for ikasumi bc I love her but what if she has a pet familiar like mochi does and she gets tattoos of them and when she fights she can summon ink versions of them similar to Megumi from JJK or Aki from CSM

i think if she were to have little friends, it would be the little things she draws and brings to life to keep her company!!! but since shes such a uhhhhh bad artist, her little friends are never anything cool or elegant looking like the familiars, its usually something dumb and decrepit looking like her little friends in this post!! half the time you cant even tell what it is.....mochis like "oh no! a dog monster!" and ikasumi goes "Its a fish."

but yeah her original power inspo is actually sai from naruto!!! i havent watched the series in forever but as a kid i always thought the whole "draw something on a page, bring it to life in the 3d world while it retains its ink-like looks" is so cool...,,.

pre-timeskip while shes doodling in her notebook, her little friends pop to life and hang out around her, walking around on the table and stuff (not at school obviously not to cause trouble, but other places). i also wanna say her little creatures are like the little snowmen on that series ice-guy-and-the-cool-female-colleague where they reflect the emotions she doesnt show herself!!!

(i also wanna say theyre like the soot on spirited away, in the sense that you can like.... "squash" them physically but they just.....re-manifest out of the ink puddle? the only way they get back on the page is if you hit them with something paper, or if ikasumi puts them back in the notebook herself !!!

[sunshineandlyrics]

*Women linked to Harry over the years, and don't forget Taylor, Kendall, Olivia and Emily Ratajkowski.

(I was initially curious which of the women linked to Harry got these 'get to know' articles. Turns out all of them unless they're already well known)

[waugh-bao]

*

[definitely-not-a-cowboy]

i didn’t intend for everything i reblog to be gay but my homophobic mother didn’t intend for 60% of her children to be gay either so

[sleepyconfusedpotato]

⚔️ Task Force 141 - NFL AU 🏈

by me (sleepyconfusedpotato) and @alypink ! This AU will include some Original Characters made by us both!

---

New Hampshire 141s, a new rising american football team whose players dominantly came from the United Kingdom, is ready to face the NFL season!

As the previous Head Coach, Herschel von Shepherd got fired by the General Manager MacMillan, John Price (who has roots in rugby) got chosen by MacMillan to bring the team to victory. Let us see which players caught Coach Price's eyes!

John Price (HC)

John Price was born in Liverpool, England, but moved to America when he was still very young due to his father being deployed from the military to an American base. Although his father retired a couple of years later, they decided to stay in America. He grew up loving sports as a child but American football always piqued his interest more than any other sports. He played safety in middle and high school, but in his junior year, he had Meniscal tears that prevented him from ever playing again. John was heavily depressed after his injury, one day one of his close friends, Nikolai, who was also one of his fellow teammates on his high school team, told him to cheer him up to go watch the team play or to attend the training camps, John agreed and started assisting to the games and eventually started to think about becoming a head coach. He was recommended by his former high school head coach to take the job as a defensive coordinator for the New Hampshire Wildcats, a college football team. His performance and playbook were impressive, leading the Wildcats to reach a bowl and winning it twice. He proved to be fit and ready for a professional football team in the NFL and was hired as a defensive coordinator by the New Hampshire 141’s, by the HC at that time, Herschel von Shepherd. His first two seasons were disastrous as there was friction between the players and their head coach, most of the players disagreed with Shepherd's decisions and playmaking. To add to that, he seemed to never care about the player's input or needs. Although in those seasons they held a record of 4 wins and 12 losses, the General Manager of the team noticed his defense was the best in the league for both points and yards, and also noticed that a good portion of his defense players were selected on the all-pro team of those two seasons. After the owner and GM fired Shepherd as a Head Coach, John took his place.  In his first seasons with the 141s, he restructured the team and went to playoffs and one NFC championship. As he wanted to improve his team, he started attending college football games, he attended once a college game in which he met the offensive coordinator at the time, Aly, and after the game he met her to ask about some players he was interested in on her actual team, for QB and WR positions, they became acquaintance since that day and kept communication for some time, as she sent some prospects his way. She also requested his help every now and then, making him attend her games and inviting her over to watch the 141s too. After spending time together and sharing the same interests and love for football, they started to date but kept it low as two months later, John hired her as his new offensive coordinator.

#26 Kyle Garrick (WR)

the most responsible and reliable player of the team. Kyle’s dad was an ex-WR and a former head coach out of a college football team. His father is a very hardworking man and disciplines his son like a football player, and with that, comes a great expectation for Kyle since his high school years. Kyle is extremely reliable, responsible, and respected on and off the field. He is HC John Price's favorite due to his work ethic. Kyle believes in having discipline in everything he does to be one of the best. He keeps a picture of his girlfriend, Eleanor Graham (Ladybug) everywhere, especially in his locker room as he says she brings him good luck for catching the hail mary’s from Alex.  Kyle and Alex met in Baylor University, where they played together and won many games, including several bowl games. They became best friends in and out of the football field, supporting each other infinitely. “You've got friends nearby.” On Alex’s quote, “I can throw the ball like ‘fuck it, he’s over there somewhere’ and Kyle would magically appear and catch the ball. He’s always at the right place.”

One day during practice Alex was throwing the ball too far to the left, which headed straight towards her head. On instinct and in an attempt to catch the ball, Kyle collided with Eleanor, which bruised her arms. Instead of being upset like how Kyle would expect her to react, she laughed loudly at him, saying that she chose to sit there. She knew the hazard of studying near a football field. Even though Eleanor said she can take care of her bruises, Kyle insisted on nursing her. (Alex SMILED ear to ear). They both met from time to time. Every practice, Kyle always looks for Eleanor on the side of the field. Eleanor’s laid-back personality often bothers Kyle as she's a damn med school student, but through her, Kyle learns how to slow down and live in the moment. Love bloomed between them and they became a couple midway through freshman year. 

When Kyle was drafted to the NFL to be with Alex for New Hampshire 141s, Eleanor was there with him when he received the call from HC Price. Though Eleanor has to stay in Texas to continue her studies, Eleanor travels to New Hampshire often to visit Kyle.

#31 Alex Keller (QB)

Alex is the quarterback of the 141s, second draft pick and first QB of his university. He is very skilled and hard-working, he is in love with water girl Farah Karim and aspires to be like Tom Brady. He and Kyle Garrick (WR) met in their first year of freshman in University and they played since their first year as the duo of QB and WR (Burrow and Chase vibes) and were drafted together in the NFL draft by the same team. Young duo but very effective especially during the regular season. Alex Keller met Farah Karim in his rookie season during training camp in his first year and has been infatuated with her. Since then, he has tried to score ASAP or reach 4th down so he can sit on the bench and talk with her. Whenever he can, he visits and picks her up from University and helps her out whenever he can in anything she would need.

#70 Simon Riley (TE)

Simon Riley used to be a rugby player in England. He joined the rugby team during his college days and met Price as one of his coaches, who trained and guided him to become one of the most dominant flankers in college rugby. Unfortunately, though he’s always dependable whenever he’s on the field, Simon was often riddled with injuries. His quiet personality didn’t help his case either, bearing the pain in his left leg in silence, until one day, he tore his ACL during an important game which cost the team their winning chances. Simon rested for a whole year to heal his knee. Together with his familial struggle, he contemplated quitting being an athlete. That was until Coach Price offered him a fresh start in the USA. As a flanker is equivalent to the Tight End position in American football, Price told him that he would be perfect for the role. Simon was adamant at first as he was still injured and how he’d be able to completely heal from this devastating injury. But when he said that in America they could find him a good physiotherapist to help him heal his knee, he reluctantly accepted the offer.  Simon got into the draft and was a first-round pick due to how much of a good player he was in rugby. On his first day on the team, he met the other players who got drafted, but the most important and the most fateful meeting was when he got introduced to Charlotte Le Jardin (nickname Jade to simplify her last name), a physiotherapist that Laswell had promised help him to heal his ACL and help him regain his top form. It was a rough road, but with every step he took, Jade was there to help him.  Now, every injury he has he doesn’t stay on the sidelines but goes inside the tent or the stadium so he can be checked by her. Whenever Jade’s out watching the game, he scores more than usual or gets distracted. He often carries the team, especially during the conference championship games. 

#71 Johnny MacTavish (RB)

Johnny MacTavish was born and raised in Scotland. After high school, he was offered an academic and sports scholarship to a prominent university in the USA. He began his football career when he was a freshman at University as a very talented runner, which elevated him as the starter RB on his fifth game. In his senior year he was  awarded the Heisman Trophy winner at college, but due to a shoulder injury, he missed being the top pick at the draft. He was later selected by the New Hampshire 141s and got put in as a starter as soon as he got drafted. He has good chemistry with his team but gets injured by overdoing himself or trying to tackle defensive players on the other team. He is also constantly with Jade for treatment and often misses important playoff games. Johnny is a very talented running back and that is why HC Price can’t get rid of him no matter how he misses practices and meetings and how his personal life affects his performance on the field. He always tries to take his friend Simon Riley to social gatherings and social media, but he completely shuts him down every time. That's different on the field though, as whenever Johnny's going to play a run, Simon will always be there in front of him to push the tacklers away, making way for Johnny to score a first down or a touch down. They're an unstoppable duo together. Johnny is very popular among female fans, making his jersey the one with the most sales every year. His dating story is pretty large and his games are always attended by the women he dates (which constantly changes).

some memes I made 😭

Here's the Hereford 141S' Logo and jersey design! The logo is heavily inspired by the Task Force 141's logo, so it's pretty much just a sporty twist of the logo!

More characters underneath the cut!

#11 Alejandro Vargas (MLB) and #22 Rodolfo Parra (OLB)

(Drawing to be posted!)

Alejandro and Rudy both moved to El Paso, Texas when they started high school at the age of 14 years old. They were avid football (soccer) players during their time in Mexico, but when they started High School they began to play football. Both Alejandro and Rodolfo played as Linebackers, Ale being MLB and Rodolfo being OLB. They did amazing in High School then they both received a scholarship to attend the university in Dallas, Texas. Both of them were later selected to do the NFL Pathway program, for both of them. Being together since their childhood years, high school and university they were a packaged deal and were both selected on the same team, same position on the NFL draft.  Alejandro is especially hyped when playing against Philip Graves, QB of the Dallas Shadows. They have had beef with each other on and off the field since they played against each other for the first time. Ale’s average sack during a game against Dallas is approximately 5 per game, he sometimes is way too harsh while tackling making him get a couple of flags whenever he blitzes and sacks. He’s often scolded by his friend Rudy, but he does not care as long as he can sack Graves.

Kate Laswell (Defensive Coordinator)

(Drawing to be posted!)

was raised in Virginia, USA. Both her parents and brothers loved football and so did she. Since elementary, she watched and never missed a game during weekends, she always had a fascination for the Chicago Bears and their ‘85 team. Her father told her about how that defense, without an extraordinary QB or offense made them win the superbowl and also made them the best defense of all time. After witnessing that season and that Superbowl, she fell in love with how the defense scheme in football works. Unfortunately professional football for women wasn’t an option, so she studied a lot to become a defensive coordinator. She studied day and night, memorizing the plays, analyzing games and creating new playbooks since she was young. She struggled a lot to have an opportunity since it was a male-dominated team. One of her childhood friends made it to the roster to become a defensive coordinator for the Colorado Buffaloes College Football Team, he was a good coach but not “impressive”. She supported him by attending his games but couldn't help but try to talk to him whenever she thought he could do better, often interrupting his play callings during his games to make him change the play, and it always worked. She and his friend attended a College Bowl, and met John Price at that game, the three of them watched the game and she started to tell both of them what adjustment she would do for both teams, and that piqued John’s interests as she was awfully right, he was impressed by how well she read offense’s routes and how she was able to change from a 3-4 or 4-3 to a hybrid defense. He decided to give her a chance and hired her as his new defensive coordinator for the 141’s and established a very good partnership and friendship with her ever since.

Farah Karim (Intern Physical Therapy Student - Watergirl)

(Drawing to be posted!)

Farah Karim is a university medical student who got an internship in his junior year of college to be the water girl and help around the New Hampshire  141s team. She comes from an immigrant family and is the pride and joy of her parents. She struggled so much in her younger years to pursue an education and get into a good college in the USA, she managed to get a scholarship due to her great school performance and was given the chance to work with a professional football team. She met Alex Keller after his rookie season and developed a close friendship with them that later turned into a romantic interest. She is grateful for his help and also supports him during games. Her classmates usually bug her by asking Farah to let them meet Alex or to set them up with him, which she dislikes very much.

(OC) Alyssa Martinez (Offensive Coordinator)

Aly was born in Mexico and moved to the USA thanks to a scholarship she received when she graduated from High School and moved to Texas to attend college. As soon as she graduated from Texas A&M holding a Bachelor of Science in Sport Management, she started working as an offensive coordinator at a local highschool. She then escalated to being an offensive coordinator for the College she attended. Aly managed to take the team to a College Bowl where she met 141s Head Coach John Price and became acquaintances after that game, they kept communication after that game, as Aly asked for suggestions for her playbook and she helped Price on suggesting him prospects for the upcoming draft selection and also players on free agency.  She was later hired by Price as his offensive coordinator and they began to have a low key romantic  relationship. She specializes in West Coast offense, having her team play the Air Coryell scheme. She suggested Price to draft Alex Keller as he was the perfect pocket passer that would fit their offense perfectly. She’s an avid Tom Brady fan.

(OC) Charlotte Le Jardin (Physical Therapist)

Originally from England, Jade was adopted by an American couple and moved with them to the United States at an early age. Her parents, Eli and Gracie, worked at Bravo Stadium, home of the 141s, and Jade became a constant presence on the sidelines. As time went by, the Bravo Stadium became her home. Jade started helping around the sidelines bringing water, towels, medical kits, and even helping out in the blue tent, all the while completing her college in biological science and doctor of physical therapy (DPT), and of course, licensing in Physical Therapy. When she got her license, her experience was already on par with the other physiotherapists since she had been jumping from senior to seniors, learning and practicing all she could. Kate Laswell who has been seeing Jade there since she was a teenager, hired Jade as one of the many physiotherapists for 141s, and with that came a fateful challenge: a newcomer Tight End with a torn ACL from his rugby days, who’s trying to get back to his top form in order to play in the NFL.

---

PHEW so there you have it! If you've read it this far, oh my LORD me and Aly love you so much! This is a pretty severe brainrot that we had, so hope you like it!

And let's enjoy the 2024 NFL Season 🏈🏈🏈

Hope you like it! 🥰🥰

[lilyprettyremy]

Polished and Productive: The It Girl Playbook for Organization. 💋☕️

- The Power of a Chic Planner 📄 Your planner is more than just dates and deadlines, it’s your daily sidekick. Opt for one that’s stylish and functional—think sleek leather covers, minimalist designs, and plenty of space for your goals. Use it to jot down tasks, appointments, and those brilliant ideas you get on the go.

- Create a Morning Routine That Sets the Tone 📋 Start your day with a quick, five-minute planning session. Outline your top three priorities, a to-do list, and a motivational quote. This mini habit keeps you focused and ready to conquer the day ahead.

- Declutter Your Digital Space 💻 Your phone and laptop should be as chic as your outfit. Organize your apps into folders, clear out your camera roll, and set a wallpaper that inspires you. Keep your inbox clean by unsubscribing from emails that no longer serve you—it’s like a digital detox.

- Capsule Wardrobe, but for Your Desk 🖋️ Keep your workspace minimalist and clutter-free. Think of it like a capsule wardrobe: only the essentials, but each item should be purposeful and aesthetically pleasing. A sleek pen holder, a chic planner, and a scented candle are all you really need.

- Time Blocking: Your Secret Weapon 🗓️ An It Girl knows that multitasking is out, and time blocking is in. Set specific times for studying, working, and breaks. This method keeps you in control of your schedule, so you can slay your to-do list without feeling overwhelmed.

- Organize Your Thoughts with Brain Dumps 📓 Feeling overwhelmed? Do a quick brain dump—grab a notebook and write down everything on your mind. It’s like a reset button for your brain, clearing the clutter so you can focus on what truly matters.

- Weekly Reset Ritual 🕊️ Dedicate one day a week to reset. This is your time to clean your space, plan for the week ahead, and refresh your mindset. Light a candle, put on a playlist, and make this ritual something you look forward to.

- Stay Inspired with a Vision Board Keep your goals front and center with a vision board. Whether digital or physical, fill it with images, quotes, and aesthetics that align with your dream life. It’s a daily reminder of what you’re working towards and why you’re putting in the effort.

[madridfangirl]

Making up after a fight - Jude Bellingham blurb

A/n - fluff, angst, comfort, suggestive

900 words. Jude*female reader.

……………………………………………………………………

‘You were amazing today. Congrats on the MOTM, so well deserved!’

You hit send, hoping for a response. You were supposed to be at the match, supporting him. But the two of you had gotten into an ugly fight just this morning. Which, in hindsight, was kinda your fault. But, hindsight is a bitch and you were downright furious in the morning.

A particular reel on your insta feed, of Jude with an upcoming Spanish actress, is what you had woken up to. The woman was gorgeous, and way too obvious with Jude - the hair flicks, side eyes, giggles, touching the arm for that extra second, all straight out of the playbook.

The hug though is what enraged you the most. Coz Jude had also wrapped both arms around her, not the typical one arm shoulder hug thing he usually did with other women. That, combined with the fact that Jude liked the pics she posted of the meeting made you blow your top.

To be fair, you had tried to avoid the fight before an important CL match, the first home KO match in-fact. But Jude had gotten impatient with your radio silence, pestered you for a call and then you couldn’t hold back.

He tried to explain that she was working on a social media campaign for RM, and other players had liked the post too. But you had shot back saying that was no reason for him to let that woman feel him up.

Jude was frustrated, and lost his cool too. This was not a new fight. You two had been here way too many times. Usually he was patient, knowing that his lifestyle was not ideal for a new relationship, but the timing of it, right before one of the most crucial matches of his career, is what irked him.

So yeah, it ended up with you not attending the match. Not even sending him a good luck message before the match, something you had never missed in the last 4 months since your first date. To top it off, you even used a nuclear weapon that you knew would set him off. By mentioning a colleague of yours who Jude hated with all the bones in his body.

It was only when you saw another angle of the video (taken on phone by other attendees) that you realised you had overreacted. The woman was still pathetic but Jude did pull back immediately from the hug, and maintained his distance. But, it was too late by then and the match had already started.

‘I am so proud of you, Jude.’

You were still on texts. Fully aware that if you call and he disconnects / doesn’t pick up, it will hurt you & your ego both.

The messages were seen. No response. It was now 1.5 hours after the match. He would be home already or on the way.

‘Wish I had been there, instead of moping all day.’

‘Why? That fucker wasn’t good company?’

Well at-least that was a response. At least.

‘Jude, I didn’t go. I wouldn’t. You know that.’

‘You had no problem throwing that in my face though.’

He was right, you could see that. It really was a low & petty blow. If only you were as clear headed in the morning.

‘I am sorry, baby. For that & everything else today. For assuming all those things without hearing you out. Really, I am.’

No response for 2 minutes, which made her anxious.

‘Don’t think I am cheating, then? Don’t think I am going to her right now or went to her last night?’

He was goading her, she could tell. But he was hurting too, that also she could tell.

‘No, I don’t.’

‘Why the change of heart, when you were so convinced earlier?’

He wasn’t gonna make it easy for her.

‘Is that important? Look, I know I messed up. I know I ruined what could have been a great day for us. You really should be celebrating right now instead of feeling shitty. And I really really am sorry, Jude. Pls can we just get over this?’

A pregnant pause, again.

She doubled down with another nuclear weapon in her kitty.

‘I love you. So much it hurts. Yes I do get crazy sometimes but you know, in your heart you know where it’s coming from.’

If this doesn’t work, she won’t know what else to do.

1 minute later, her phone flashed.

‘I needed you today.’

She clutched the phone to her chest, sighing deeply, sensing his resignation.

‘I know, honey. Promise I will be there for the next big game. And whenever else you need me.’

‘It was so shitty to play like this. Not knowing where we stand. Not knowing if you were anywhere near that asshole. Might have tackled some of the guys extra hard today.’

‘Again, I am so so sorry. But I am also super proud that despite all this you still came out on top. Like you always do.’

Jude read and re-read the text a few times, sat in his car. She always knew what she was doing so this couldn’t just be a coincidence.

‘Tryna tempt me?’

‘Depends - is it working?’

‘Be careful what you wish for, doll. I don’t have a handle on myself today.’

‘Wanna come here & show me what that’s like?’

‘Gonna ask one more time - are you sure?’

‘Uh-huh. I do deserve some disciplining today, don’t you think?’

‘I’ll be there in 20. And doll, you may have to take an off tmrw.’

……………………………………………

[13uswntimagines]

The Royal Playbook (Alessia X Leah X Royal!R)

Summary: It wasn't often that you used your name or your titles, but to see your girlfriends, you would do just about anything. Even if it means going head-to-head with your new security. 

Warnings: Slightly suggestive, but otherwise nothing. It's a fluff piece.

Your life was complicated. Well… that may have been putting it lightly. 

Everything in your life had been planned for you since well before you were born. You had a tutor, an etiquette instructor, and an equestrian coach from the moment you came screaming into the world. Along with a security detail and a personal team of butlers to help you navigate life. 

It was simple, you would be academically trained, coached in diplomacy (and swordsmanship as was customary on Braavos), and exposed to different cultures so that you could continue to lead your country like your father and his mother before him. You would marry a foreign diplomat, and make political bonds that would strengthen your little island nation’s place in Europe. 

Falling in love had never been a part of that plan. 

Neither had your absolute obsession with football. Specifically, your obsession with English football. 

But your parents had taken it in stride and were far more accepting than you had any right to believe they would be. They were supportive even after they found out you preferred the fairer sex, and they absolutely adored the women who had stolen your heart.

You happened to adore them too. 

Well, something stronger than adore. 

You would do anything for them. 

They made you willing to break all of the carefully constructed rules you had grown up with. They made you forget the weight of responsibility that had been balanced on your shoulders since your coronation date was set the day you turned 16. 

They treated you like Y/n instead of Her Majesty the heir to the throne. They made you feel normal. 

It killed you that you couldn’t be… open with your relationship. That having the world know would put them in the firing line. 

You sighed, leaning back into the leather seat as the SUV slowed, turning in front of the Emirates. The dark window tint blocked out the flashing lights, and the thousands of pounds of armor plating dulled the chanting from the throngs of people. The little flags on the cars in your motorcade told them all who was inside, even if they didn’t know which of the 4 cars you were in. 

You shifted, tugging at the hem of your jersey. “Do you think we’ll make it in time for warmups?”

The new material was still tight on your skin, so much different than the cotton dress shirts you normally wore, and the two little names above your favorite number felt unnaturally… weighted. 

They were in a way. As soon as a photographer caught a picture of them, your secret would be out. 

“I’ve sent a team ahead to clear your entrance and the box you’ll be staying in, so as long as we can get through this crowd we should make it,” Davis said, glancing up at you in the rearview mirror. “I know they’re your favorite part,”

You hummed, glancing back out of the darkened windows at the masses of people dressed in white and red. 

A part of you envied them. 

You would never be able to walk into a stadium through its entrance. You would never get to see the mural of the team that existed in the main hall of the Emirates. You would never get to sit in the supporters section, surrounded by the various chants. 

The other, larger part knew how much you despised being surrounded by people. How claustrophobic it made you feel, and how hard it made it for you to breathe.

But you still wondered if it would be different if those people weren’t carrying cameras and screaming for your attention. You wondered if watching your girlfriends do the things they loved would negate how incredibly uncomfortable you got when people were too close. 

“It just completes the whole experience,” You mumbled into the glass. 

Davis made a noise of agreement. “Yes, it does,”

He knew that one of the reasons you loved it so much was because it gave you time to not have to think. To just exist in a space where you weren’t the air to the throne. Where all that mattered was what was happening in front of you. 

You didn’t have to say it for him to know. 

He could read you like a book. He had experienced every day of your life with you. He acted more like a father than your own father did, and you trusted him implicitly. 

The car inched forward, past another gaggle of people holding their phones up to video the caravan.

“We might have to go with plan b if Her Majesty wishes to see the warmups,” Your driver said more to Davis than to you.“There’s an obstruction ahead,”

Your eyebrows pulled tightly together as the car crawled forward through the growing crowd. 

Your head of security made a gruff sound, already lifting his phone and speaking rapidly into the receiver. 

You barely paid attention to what he was saying. It didn’t really matter anyway. 

You knew he would explain when they had a plan, just like he had always done before. 

The car came to a stop, and men dressed in bright yellow jackets came pouring out of an entrance you hadn’t recognized, forming a human tunnel. 

Davis turned in his seat to face you. 

“We’re going to go in a different entrance. I’ll guide you, Gabriel and Tomas will flank us,” He explained. “It’s 16 steps to the door. Stadium security will make sure that they’re unobstructed,”

You hummed. “Will you cover my back?”

It wasn’t that you were ashamed to wear your Loves names. 

It actually made you incredibly proud and had a warmth blooming in your chest that was hard to explain. 

But you weren’t quite ready to share that with the world yet. 

You wanted to protect them from your world for as long as you could. To prevent the people who didn’t agree with your family’s policies from hurting them to get to you. 

“My jacket will block you,” Davis assured you, understanding glinting in his eyes. “We’re ready whenever you are,” 

You leaned back into the leather seat, glancing at the little walkway that had been created. Fans pressed against it, and you could imagine the wall of sound that would meet you. 

You flipped your sunglasses down over your eyes. “Let’s get this over with,” 

“I’ll get out and open your door,” Your security chief said, reiterating the protocol you always followed when you had to exit your car in a crowd. 

You nodded, never looking away from the window. 

You took a deep breath when the car door opened, letting in the onslaught of screams and cheers. They only got louder when Davis opened your door and held his hand out to help you out of the car. 

He shielded you as soon as your feet were both on the ground, wrapping an arm over your shoulders, directly blocking the names on your back. 

You tucked your face into his chest, closing your eyes at the roar of squeals and cheers that met you. 

You never did like crowds. 

You felt Tomas take up your other side and counted down the steps in your head as they guided you through the crowd. You didn’t look up at the calls of your name, or the blinding flashes of light, or the jostling that your security tried to protect you from. 

This was routine. 

The press didn’t pay for photos when your face wasn’t clearly visible. 

You let out a long breath when the entrance doors closed solidly behind you. 

“It’s over little commander,” Your burly chief of security mumbled into your hair when you didn’t immediately begin to untangle yourself from him, running his hand up and down your back. 

You really didn’t like crowds. 

You sucked in another long breath before carefully pulling away from him. 

“Thank you,” You said, straightening your hair and jersey. Smiling just a bit at the name he had given you after an incident involving your country’s general and an assassin when you were five. 

“I don’t think anyone caught a photo of your jersey, your majesty. The Captain's jacket was covering the lettering,” Gabriel added, glancing out the glass doors. “Though I think it’ll be harder to hide if we leave with guests. We’ll also need extra security,” 

It made you sigh. 

Gabriel was not a bad person, but he was young, and far too serious all of the time. 

He hadn’t learned that you didn’t need to know all of the inner workings of their operation yet, or that you were the one who would dictate what you wanted. 

You hadn’t even decided if your girlfriends would be leaving with you yet, and when you did, Davis would work it out. 

He always figured it out. 

“We’ll cross that bridge later,” Davis said, glaring at the younger guard (they would pull the SUV on the fucking field if that’s what it took), before his eyes returned to you, softening. “First, I believe your attendant is waiting to scan your ticket,”

Your eyes lit up at the prospect, looking past your burly squad towards a very shy looking girl. 

“I can scan you in,” The girl's voice shook as she spoke, her eyes darting towards your guards before meeting yours again. “Your majesty,” 

You rolled your eyes at the title. 

You hated it as much now as you had when you first learned you would be your fathers successor. As much as when people started using when you were 16 and your coordination date was set for the day you turned 22. 

Davis passed you a paper ticket and nudged you forward. 

It was a superfluous detail that your girlfriends had teased you mercilessly about. 

No one used paper tickets anymore, they said. Everything was mobile, not that you had ever needed an actual ticket. 

You stepped towards the girl, holding out the ticket with a grin. 

She very gently took it, running it under the little scanner. You walked past her after it beeped. 

It was nice to get the full experience, even if it was a bit outdated. 

“We’ll take that back,” Davis said, as the girl turned to throw the scrap of paper away. 

He reached for the ticket, tucking it into his jacket for safe keeping. 

“To the box little commander?” He asked you directly, stepping past the girl. 

You shook your head, a smirk playing at your lips. “I think a little… exploration is in order first. Especially since we’ve never come into the stadium this way before,” 

“Lead the way then,” He matched your smirk, gesturing for you to head down the hallway. “The mural you’re obsessed with is to the left,” 

Your eyes brightened again and you looked down the hallway he had gestured to. 

You would definitely have to check it out before warmups started. 

******

Alessia and Leah were… distracted, even as they passed the ball back and forth. 

Warmups had barely started and they couldn’t help the way their eyes kept falling to the box now occupied by a tall, bald man in a well-tailored suit, his aviators reflecting the field back at them. 

They should have expected it. Tomas was always the first of your personal team to arrive to a location, but usually, you followed closely behind him. 

“The queen has arrived,” Millie chuckled, intercepting the ball Leah had passed towards  Alessia. 

“She’s not queen yet,” Alessia huffed.

“How could I forget? The coronation isn’t for 2 more months,” Millie said, waving her arm dramatically. 

Leah rolled her eyes. “3 more months, actually,”

“And Y/n isn’t exactly counting down the days,” Alessia added, stealing the ball back. “She doesn’t seem too keen on the title,”

“I’m not surprised,” Ella said, catching the ball when Alessia tried to pass it to Leah. “She got mobbed coming into the stadium,”

Leah’s eyebrows furrowed. “I thought she was using the player entrance,” 

You had discussed the plan with them in detail during your nightly phone conversation, asking about the location of the locker rooms in relation to the entrance your security wanted you to use. 

They weren’t sure if you intended to surprise them before or after the match, but it didn’t really matter. 

“Apparently not,” Ella said, skirting around the forward's outstretched leg and passing it to Millie. “I saw the clip before we came out here. Looked like they formed a wall of security and then ushered her in the front gate,” 

Leah and Alessia shared a look. 

They knew how much you disliked being in a crowd. 

They could picture you tucked into your security chief’s chest like a small child, trying to hide yourself from the noise of the crowd. It was an image that had been splashed across front pages of newspapers more times than they could (or wanted) to count. It still never failed to break their hearts. 

“I never realized how big her security team was,” Ella mumbled, glancing up at the box again. “Like physically. They’re fucking mountains,” 

More of your team had joined Tomas, all wearing the same black suits and dark aviators, tall, and muscular.

They looked intimidating. Like they could take down any threat that would come at you. 

Neither Alessia nor Leah had any doubt that they would. 

Alessia shrugged. Frankly, they had both been very nervous too until you had actually introduced them to your security. They learned quickly to expect pranks from your security when they weren’t on duty, and that their protectiveness extended to them as well as you when they were. 

Considering all 12 members of your team had given them the shovel talk, they knew you were in very good hands. Hands that looked out for your mental health as well as your physical health. 

“Looks like she only brought half her team,” Leah hummed, counting the men in the suite, noting your missing head of security. He would certainly be wherever you were, and she found it slightly strange you weren’t in the box yet. 

You hated missing warmups. 

But then a group standing near the benches, behind Serina caught her eyes. 

There were 4 tall, burly men surrounded by stadium workers dressed in bright orange vests. 

“Maybe not,” Alessia mumbled, her gaze also falling to the growing crowd behind the benches. “She doesn’t usually try to come down to the field,”

“She’s never had to come through the front door before either,” Leah answered. 

Ella wiggled her eyebrows, shimming between them. “Maybe she wants to do something wild before she has the weight of a country on her back,” 

“She already has that,” Both blonde women said in unison, eyes snapping away from the sea of orange towards the midfielder. 

“She’s had that since her father put her in charge of their trade negotiations,” Alessia added. “And their UK commerce,”

Frankly, you had been taking more and more responsibility for years. Trying to gain the trust of your people so the transition of power was an easy one. A safe one. 

An uncontested one. 

“And she’s been doing a bang-up job,” Leah said, just as Davis appeared in the mix of security next to a blonde man she had never seen before. “She’s actually coming in the field,” 

“You mean we finally get to meet the Queen?” Millie said dramatically, standing on her tiptoes to catch a glimpse of you, the ball forgotten at her feet. 

Alessia slapped her stomach. “You’ve met her before. You tried to get her drunk after our Euros win and convince her to fly the England flag on her father’s palace,”

“Details,” Millie rolled her eyes, shoving the striker. “How can she see through the mass of people though?”

“It’s a special formation,” Leah grumbled, pushing Millie, and stealing the ball they had all disregarded as she moved it forward she saw Davis shift and the flash of a pair of aviators. You were certainly on the field. “Designed so she can see out but no one can see her. They’re trying not to draw attention,” 

Ella snorted. “Well, they failed at that,”

It was true. 

The fans in the stands seemed to be clamoring over themselves to see why there was a substantial crowd near the benches. 

Leah and Alessia shared a look. 

They both knew how much you hated attention. It was why you usually stayed in your box and came in through back entrances. They joked you were like a ghost coming to their games, never seen or heard. 

But this. This was different. 

Before they could respond Geriant clapped his hands, “Alright ladies let’s do some through balls on goal. Lineup,”

Leah tapped him the ball and followed Alessia to the back of the line. 

There would be time later to figure out why you had come down in the field. 

Right now they had to focus on beating Australia, especially if they wanted a good game kiss from you after the game. 

You only kissed winners. 

******

You shifted awkwardly as you leaned against the cool, stone wall outside the locker rooms, playing with the identification lanyard around your neck. 

It wasn’t often that you used your… status to get into areas no fans could. That you finagled your way into the tunnel of the stadium after a game. 

You were much more prone to letting your security whisk you in and out so you weren’t seen and no one knew if you were actually there, but today, you had been feeling bold. 

Well, kind of. 

Davis had been the one to suggest that seeing warmups at field level might be fun if you were going to venture to see the mural. 

You had agreed. 

And he had been right. 

You had gotten to chat with Serina about tactics and formations while getting a close-up view of your girlfriends in action, even if it was just warmups. 

You had gone back up to your fancy box for the game, but couldn’t resist Serina’s invitation to wait for the team in the tunnel after. 

That’s how you ended up here, shifting nervously from foot to foot while the players made their mandatory lap around the field. 

It wasn’t really being in the tunnel that had you on edge. It was that Davis had gone to coordinate your motorcade out of the stadium, and left you with Gabriel. You didn’t feel as… safe with the blonde man, and his seriousness was really starting to set you off. 

You would have to very carefully bring it up with Davis later, though you hated doing anything that could potentially make his job harder. 

“Can you, um, not stand so close please?” you mumbled, as he pressed more closely to you as players from the Australian team started to make their way down the tunnels. “I want to say hello to the players,” 

Gabriel shook his head, standing firmly. “They haven’t been checked through security,”

“They just played a match,” You rolled your eyes, pushing him away from you, trying to create some space. “I doubt any of them are smuggling a weapon between here and the locker room, or have Ill intent,” 

They were your friends. People, your girlfriends played with every day. People you had spent a lot of time with. People who saw you as a person and not as a title. They wouldn’t cause you harm. 

“We can’t take that risk, Your Majesty,” Gabriel answered, already pressing back to pin you between his back and the wall, as his head whipped back and forth. 

You shoved him off of you more harshly, stumbling with the force. “I told you to go away. Why don’t you go stand at the front of the tunnel if you’re so worried,” 

You would have face-planted had strong arms not caught you. 

“Whoa there Princess,” Leah’s warm voice chuckled in your ear, using the term of endearment that annoyed you when it came from anyone but your girlfriends. “You only had to fall for me once,”

“Leah,” Your shoulders instantly relaxed at her voice, and you looked up to meet her eyes. “You guys played so well!”

She smiled brilliantly at you, and you leaned up to place a gentle kiss on her lips. 

It only lasted a second before a large hand appeared between you. 

“No physical contact please,” Gabriel said, looking incredibly uncomfortable. “It’s policy,” 

You glared at the side of his face. 

You were definitely going to have to talk to Davis about this. 

“What about me pretty girl?” Alessia asked,  materializing to Gabriel’s right. “Do I not deserve a kiss too?

“You definitely do. That goal was a fucking banger,” You said, pulling away from the defender, and throwing out a foot mocking the way Alessia had smashed the ball. “Lee crossed it in and then woosh,”

You threw your arms out, mimicking the goal celebration that Alessia did. The one that reminded you of an airplane, right into her waiting grasp. 

She leaned forward, brushing your nose with her. “You’re adorable,”

You closed the last millimeter, connecting your lips in a gentle kiss. 

She tasted like mint gum, and blue Gatorade, and something so… Alessia. She tasted like home. 

“And you look very fit with our names on your back,” Leah added, running her fingers across the bold letters across your shoulders before she wrapped her arms around the two of you. 

You buried your face in Alessia’s chest to hide the red blooming across your cheeks, earning a giggle from both women. 

“Your majesty, I don't feel comfortable with this situation,” Gabriel said, clearing his throat, and stepping into your space. He leaned down and lowered his voice like he thought it would prevent Leah and Alessia from hearing him.  “We’re in too public of a place. It’s not befitting of the crown,”

You froze, your back going rigid. 

It was one thing for him to not understand personal boundaries. For him to be hyper-vigilant. 

You could chalk that up to his… newness. 

But this. This you could not tolerate. 

Your fingers caught Alessia’s top before she could pull away, forcing her to stay pressed against you, as your other hand reached back to hold Leah’s hip. You didn’t need them to move. You didn’t want them to move. 

You took a deep breath before pulling your face out of Alessia’s chest to stare daggers at the bulky, blonde man. 

“Call for backup,” You said, your voice deadly calm. 

He raised an eyebrow at you. “There’s no need. I have it-“ 

“It wasn’t a request,” You cut him off icily. “Call for backup now, or I will do it myself,” 

He paused at your tone, glancing at the teammates and friends that had been on their way to the locker room, also frozen at the foreign chill in your voice. 

It was the tone you saved for meetings with world leaders you didn’t particularly like. Ones with foreign dignitaries who thought they could walk all over you, your family, and your country. 

He took a step back, lowering his voice like he was talking to a child. “Your majesty, I don’t think this is a proper conversation to have with an audience,” 

You weren’t in the mood to be scolded. 

“And I don’t care what you think,” You bit back, letting go of Leah’s hip to reach up to your necklace, pressing the bottom button hidden on the pendant twice. 

The signal that you needed assistance, but it wasn’t emergent or life-threatening. 

Still, within 30 seconds Tomas was rounding the corner near the locker rooms, speed walking towards you. The crowd of white and yellow jerseys parted for him like he was Mosis. 

You were slightly disappointed it wasn’t Davis, but Tomas would do. 

“Little commander,” He nodded his head in greeting, his eyes flickering across the scene before returning to you. “How can I be of assistance,”

You appreciated that he had addressed you first. 

That he acknowledged that you were the one in control here. 

But Gabriel didn’t seem to get that message. 

“Your presence isn’t needed,” The blonde security man huffed, “Her majesty is throwing a temper tantrum,”

Alessia’s fingers tightened around your hips, and you didn’t have to look at her to see the scowl pulling across her lips. Leah’s arms similarly squeezed around your shoulders and you knew daggers were being thrown his way. 

Had this been any other circumstance you were sure the growing crowd of footballers would have oooed. 

Not that you needed them.

You had this all under control. 

“Take Gabriel to the exit,” You said evenly, command and… dominance, radiating through the simple words. “or to the dumpster or the Thames. I don’t really care but get him away from me. He is relieved of his duty,”

The blonde security man sputtered. “You can’t do that. I’m-“

“Actually I can,” You cut him off. “I can do whatever the fuck I want. Tomas, please remind Gabriel of the terms of his service,”

Tomas cleared his throat, suppressing a grin. “We serve at the pleasure of our charge, Her Majesty, Princess of Braavos, heir to the throne,”

Your chest puffed a bit at your full title. 

One you generally despised, but it served its purpose here. 

“And you certainly have not… pleasured me. Not that you’re capable,” Your lips turned upwards in a cruel smirk, as Alessia and Leah, and the surrounding crowd didn’t hold in their giggles. “Perhaps you should work on your listening, and little things called consent and common sense,”

“Let’s go,” Tomas caught Gabriel’s arms before he could protest or argue with you, not that there was anything he could say. The taller, balder security man made eye contact with you before he hauled Gabriel away. “Davis and Matthew will be by shortly. I’ve left Carson at the top of the tunnel and I’ll have him perform personal security until they arrive,”

You sent him a stiff nod, standing at your full height until they were out of sight before you let yourself collapse back into Alessia. 

You would never. Could never truly be alone. 

“I fucking hate doing that,” You groaned into her chest, and Leah leaned forward to press a kiss to the back of your neck.

“We know love,” The defender hummed into your soft skin, and Alessia made a sound of agreement, shooing the crowd of football players around you to go about their way.  

“But on the bright side, you did look proper sexy,” Alessia said, gently pinching the skin just beneath the hem of your jersey. “Her Majesty, Princess of Braavos, heir to the throne,”

You couldn’t help the giggle that bugged from your lips at her terrible rendition of Tomas’ heavy accent. The one you worked incredibly hard to suppress.

It had come out slightly in the exchange, the only indicator that English was not your first language. 

It was something that happened when you were annoyed, which was rare in itself. You didn’t like to wield your power, and thankfully, you usually didn’t have to in your personal life. 

“For a second I thought you were going to yell at him in Valyrian,” Leah said, her lips working from the back of your neck up to just behind your ear. 

You hummed. “I try not to do that in mixed company,” 

Despite how much you had pushed against the mold of your upbringing, your impeccable manners could not be changed. 

Plus you knew how much Leah and Alessia loved when you spoke in your native language. How… wound up… it made them. You didn’t want to associate your annoyance with that. Ever. 

Alessia smirked. “So he can’t pleasure you?” 

You rolled your eyes at the change in subject. 

“No. He was only on my team for 3 days, and I wanted to strangle him for most of it,” Your lips pulled up in an impish smirk. “Plus I could tell that he’s never given out a feminominon in his fucking life,” 

Leah mirrored the expression against your neck, and Alessia’s eyes sparkled.

“I think we could definitely show you what we know about feminominons,” Leah said, pressing a kiss to the sensitive skin just below your ear. 

 “Would you like to shower with us?”Alessia’s thumb ran over the skin just above your pants. “We promise we won’t bite, “

“Unless you ask nicely,” Leah finished, her teeth grazing over the wet skin she had just kissed. 

It was sometimes scary how they could finish each other's thoughts, though you weren’t convinced that this had been their endgame all along. 

You melted into them, the rest of your annoyance fading. 

“I would love nothing more,” 

They nodded at Carson as they dragged you towards the locker room, the shorter, muscular man shifting to stand by the door, already talking into his earpiece. 

You just needed some time with your girls. 

It’s what you wanted and the security team would respect that and leave you undisturbed. 

They served at your pleasure after all, and so did your girlfriends apparently. 

Well, at least at the moment, they would serve to pleasure you. 

[sweetbans29]

Sweetbans Masterlist 💛

Hi lovelies! Here is a place where you can see all of my writings (Little Miss Queen of Imagine Domesticity). I hope you enjoy!

Requests are currently CLOSED! Read more about requests! Please make sure to read the link above before sending in requests. I am averaging about 2 requests per week and will do my best to complete any request coming in. On that note, thank you for trusting me with your ideas, I truly appreciate it 🥹

Caitlin Clark ���

Hey You - A history worth revisiting

Hey You (PART 2) - A future worth fighting for

Be Here - 3 times you pull Caitlin out of her head

Now's Not the Time - 4 times you rile her up

Mia Bella - You and Caitlin meet at the dog park

Not Now - 4 times Caitlin riles you up

Greece - You go on a holiday to Greece

Spoken For - Your marriage with Caitlin comes to light

Should Have Been Me - Things will never be the same

Power Couple - You and Caitlin are known as the power couple

Eyes on You - You catch Caitlin's eye during a game

Friendship Bracelet - Meeting Caitlin at a TSwift concert

Come On Now - Caitlin being super proud of you

Crush - Caitlin has a crush on you

Sleepy - 3 times Caitlin falls asleep

That’s Mine - You don’t like when people take what’s yours

Little Ones - When talk becomes reality (baby edition)

Challenge Me (Spoken For part 2) - Your teams meet as UConn takes on Iowa

Match Me - Caitlin and you are known for your game day fits

Protector - 3 times Caitlin is overprotective

It’s Not You, It’s Them - Where you hide your parents from Caitlin

Long Way Home - Miscommunication leads to unnecessary heartache

Power Couple Part 2 - You and Caitlin take the Olympics

Feud - You and Caitlin navigate a long standing media feud

Mic'd - You forget you are mic's during practice

Out - You and Caitlin compliment each other well

Mistakes - They were made

Catch Me If You Can - Caitlin cracks your code

Bowling - Date night

Jersey - Caitlin’s game jersey belongs to you

Thinking of You - It’s all about timing

Train with me - Meeting Caitlin at the gym

Exposed - 3 times your relationship was almost exposed

Frustrated - Caitlin is frustrated

Rules - You have one rule

Little Flirt - Flirting goes on for way too long

Milkshakes - Prequel to Should Have Been Me

Biggest Fan - You are the Fever’s best fan

Varsity Jacket - You forget your jacket

Support - You are an advocate for CC

Long Way Home Pt. 2 - The after

Playbook - AKA your dad is your wingman

Wait for Me - HC of CC during pregnancy

Overprotective - She’s overprotective

Photograph - She loves the way you photograph her

You’re Mine - Jealous Caitlin

Hesitation Series - Slow is okay when it’s more than just you

Tiny Dancer - You dedicate your senior project to her

Capture This - Caitlin sees you in her future

Marked - Caitlin loves to leave marks

Pups - You’re Caitlin’s neighbor

Unmarked - Marked Pt 2

Flight - You hate flying

Stress Ball - Taking care of a stressed CC

Meatball - Photography AU

Paige Bueckers 💙

Teach Me (COMPLETED) - You ask Paige to teach you all you need to know about being intimate

The Ask

The Art of Kissing

The Art of Teasing

The Art of Practice

The Art of Touching

The Tragedy of Conflict

The Art of Confessing

The Art of You

Injured - You get hurt and Paige is there for you

Private - You and Paige try to keep to yourselves

Child - Mom Paige

Kate Martin 💛

Mascot - Kate has it down bad for the school mascot

Down Low - Dating Kate

[shaunamilfman]

the ghost you dressed up as [3]

pairing: Jackie Taylor x Shauna Shipman x R summary: "Things have been a little strained with your two friends given the weight of your own suspicions, but you carry on regardless. You have a date at a party tonight with some girl you barely remember. Jackie and Shauna are being a little weird about it. What could possibly go wrong?" note: jackieshauna my beloved 🥰. warnings for descriptions of violence masterlist

You can’t help but sneak looks at Shauna just like you have all night long. Despite your newfound suspicions, you can’t change one simple fact: damn, does she look good in the so-called “boob dress.” Jackie had scoffed at the look of amused disbelief on your face when she had first uttered those words, but once you saw it, you couldn’t help but agree it was aptly named. The effect it had on Shauna’s figure was nothing short of life-changing.

Normally, you'd be all for sneaking a few peaks at Shauna throughout the night. She never seemed to mind, even before the two of you became friends–she'd encouraged it, even. Catching your eyes as they trailed across her figure and giving you a smug smile or a raised eyebrow that just dared you to keep looking. 

There's just one problem: you were getting ready for a date with another girl. Your thoughts spiral as you pull your eyes away from that plunging neckline, choosing instead to focus on the finishing touches of your outfit. You didn't know the girl all that well–truthfully, you'd already forgotten her name–but she had flirted with you the last few times you'd stopped by the video store. It was something to do, at least. Something to take your mind off of everything happening with Jackie and Shauna. 

At least you had hoped it would. It didn't seem to be working well so far, given that they insisted on getting ready with you. You were only meeting her to hang out at the party, nothing all that serious, but Jackie's voice had reached a pitch that only dogs could hear when you told her why you couldn't hang out on a Friday night, demanding to know everything about this random girl you were apparently ditching them for. Then, of course, she and Shauna just happened to also want to attend the same party. 

Go figure. 

Every time you tried to refocus your mind, there Shauna was in the background. Legs crossed lazily, lounging back on Jackie's bed like she belonged there. It was a scene straight out of Jackie's playbook, and you have a sneaking suspicion they're teaming up to work against you. Her eyes keep catching yours in the mirror, looking more and more smug every time your eyes have to dart away. 

This level of possessiveness from them simply wasn't fair, given that they're already dating each other. You weren't theirs–not in any way that mattered–yet here they were making it difficult for you to have anyone else. What gave them that right, anyway? The territorial behavior did not make sense, and it was really starting to get on your nerves. You'd rightfully pointed out the unfairness of it all earlier, and Jackie had just given you a strange look while Shauna had let out a long, exasperated sigh and threw her head back into the arm of the couch (misjudging the force and sending poor Jackie into near hysterics as Shauna had cried out in pain). 

“You know,” Jackie says, reaching over to brush stray hair flat. “That girl’s going to be boring compared to us.” Her voice is low, almost teasing, but there's a knowing glint in her eyes that makes you squirm. 

She'd been giving you unsolicited advice all night long, throwing out comments on your outfit, your hair, your date, you name it. But this is the first time one of her comments strikes home. You'd been having much the same thoughts since you had agreed to meet up with her there. A big part of you wonders how right Jackie is. The worst part is that you're not even sure you want to prove her wrong about it. 

The way Jackie says it makes you feel like she's daring you to try. To go out with this girl and be bored just to find yourself crawling back to them at the end of the night. Is there even a doubt in her mind, or is she just confirming what all of you already know? 

That some part of you wants her to be boring and forgettable so you can come back home with them tonight. You're already dreaming of curling up in Jackie's too small bed after the three of you stumble up the stairs. You can almost feel Shauna's hand just brushing your arm as she wraps her arm around Jackie's hip, who's tucked tightly between you. She'll complain, like she always does, about how the two of you together make her too hot. She'll complain about the lack of space, maybe kick you in the shin for stealing the covers, but neither of them will ever actually pull you away. You'll fit in that space like you always have. 

Jackie almost immediately zeros in, quick to jump on a perceived weakness. “Why don't we just stay home and watch a movie instead? We can watch your favorite this time, I promise.”

“After we spent all this time getting ready?” You point out with a laugh. 

“Shauna will keep the dress on,” Jackie offers with a wink. 

Your eyes widen slightly. Is it weird to give a friend permission to ogle your girlfriend? Shauna certainly would have killed—Allie's broken body flashes through your mind—someone else for doing it to Jackie. But here Jackie was, offering her girlfriend up on a silver platter. 

“I think I'll have to pass,” You say slowly. It's not like you hadn't considered it. That was not the kind of game you wanted to be pulled into. Not tonight. 

Jackie looks annoyed but unsurprised, sharing a look with Shauna behind you before she walks off to get her jacket. There's something about the way she moves–calculated, almost dismissive–that makes you immediately feel the need to take it back. Like you want to beg for her forgiveness. But you don't. 

Tatum–it had taken an embarrassingly long time for you to finally catch her name–wasn't as boring as you feared, but you still spent the night uncomfortably aware that you'd rather be spending your time with your two friends. It was a creeping realization every time you laughed at one of her jokes, knowing that Shauna would have phrased it better, or nodded along to one of her stories, knowing Jackie would have told it better. You tried to stay present, in the moment, but no matter how engaging she was, your mind kept inevitably drifting back to them. That was becoming an increasingly common problem as of late. 

Yet, when she had–with all the subtlety of a brick wall–told you to follow after her in a few minutes as she walked off further into the woods, hands already playing with the hem of her shirt, you hadn't done anything to discourage it. You'd just watched her go, heart beating rapidly in your chest, and told yourself this was what you wanted. 

You're being an asshole, you know, but you might as well get something out of the night. Of course you know exactly what she wanted. The way she tilted her head off to the side as she spoke, that slight intensity that was but a pale imitation of what came so naturally to Shauna–but it was enough. 

You can't shake the feeling of guilt that comes along with it as you start making your way into the woods after her. It wasn't like you were doing anything wrong, technically. It's not like you were actually dating either of them; you'd said it yourself just earlier the same night, but it felt strange. You'd agreed to meet up with Tatum tonight, not Jackie or Shauna. You were here to have fun, damn it. So that's what you would do. 

Only, you've already checked out on Tatum tonight. Your heart wasn't in it, if it ever was. As you stumble over protruding roots and sticks, your mind keeps coming back to Jackie, wondering how drunk she's already gotten tonight. She never seems to hold her liquor well, always slurring her words a couple drinks in. Jackie was a touchy drunk, and you were usually happy to enjoy the benefits of it. Then the thoughts of Shauna in that ridiculous dress filled your mind, doing more to entice you back to the party than Tatum had managed all evening. 

But not tonight. 

No, tonight you were trapezing through the woods to hook up with some girl whose name you hadn't remembered until three-fourths of the way through your date. 

For some reason. 

You curse silently under your breath as you catch your foot on an uneven patch of ground, sending you stumbling to your hands and knees. The sting shoots through your body as you hit the ground, and you mutter another string of curses as you wipe the dirt leaves off your skin as you start to stand up. 

It's the only reason you even notice the blocky phone laying there abandoned. You remember seeing it earlier, knowing it was Tatums. She'd pulled it out to brag about how her father could afford to buy her one, which you would've completely zoned out had it not been for the rhinestones encrusting it that brought Jackie to the forefront of your mind. It was glitzy and girly, just like something Jackie would like.

Why would she have dropped it? You start to reach for it, intent on bringing it to her when you find her, only to suddenly hear what sounds like a scream. Briefly, you consider running back to the party for help, but you don't trust your ability to find your way back to where you are once you get back to the party. Besides, you thought to comfort yourself, Tatum probably just saw a snake or something. 

You follow quickly after the sound, hoping just as much to find her as you hope not too. Man, do you wish you were back with Jackie and Shauna right now. You wondered if Jackie was already getting handsy with Shauna in your absence, hanging off her arm like she always did with you. It was Jackie's right to hang off her girlfriend's arm, of course, but the thought made you more jealous than you were comfortable admitting.

Another scream pierces the air, much closer this time. You turn just in time to see a terrified Tatum running right for you. There’s a look of relief on your face when you see her, that clearly turns to horror as you catch the reflection of moonlight on something pale, too pale just to be skin. The ghostly white mask of the person chasing after her stands out sharply in the deep dark of the woods, like every possible light source began and ended on it. Its mouth is hauntingly opened in a blood chilling scream, terrifying in both its visage and its mocking of Tatum. The dark cloak is barely able to be seen with how dark it is, leaving the mask looking as if it’s floating toward you at top speed. The blade in their hand finally catches the light, the cold, hard steel stretching into a sickening point. 

It’s no costume. Not tonight. Each and every step brings that terrifying mask closer, and you just stand stock-still in your horror, frozen in the gaze of those empty soulless eyes staring back at you. There’s a fluid purposefulness to each one of their movements, like every action is carefully calculated to be as efficient as possible. They're playing with Tatum, you realize, holding themselves back as they revel in her fear. It’s surreal, like it’s been ripped straight from a horror movie Jackie would only watch through her fingers. You’re not sure what’s more horrifying: the killer barreling toward you or the fact that you’re already weighing your options–none of which include saving Tatum.

Tatum’s certainly counting on you to help her, to bravely fight off her pursuer as she runs back to the party for help; you could tell from the look in her eyes: the belief that you’ll somehow save the day. She must not know you as well as she thought, because you certainly weren’t going to be doing that. You turn and run too, using the distance you had on her for all it’s worth. You didn’t have to outrun the guy in the bloody costume–who, judging by the speed he’s closing in, definitely could have made the track team. 

No, you just needed to be faster than her.

This wasn’t how tonight was supposed to go, you think bitterly, but here you were running for your life in the middle of the woods. This wasn’t Tatum’s fault, but you couldn’t help but blame her for it anyway. You wouldn’t be here if she hadn’t been so insistent on sneaking off into the middle of the woods to hook up when there were perfectly good bedrooms in whomever house this was. Instead, you’d allowed her to play off the slight fear everyone looked at you with since the accusations, playing right into it just like she so obviously wanted from you. Was it your fault she took your short answers as broody silences?

Your heart pounds rapidly in your ears, drowning out the noise of Tatum’s frantic screaming. You want to yell at her to save her breath, that she’s not doing anyone any favors by wasting precious air on screaming, but that’s not entirely true, is it? No, she’s doing you a favor by making herself an easy target. You can hear her stumbling, hear the cracking of sticks beneath her feet, and hear the frantic footfalls off every step. But what’s more important is that you can’t hear whoever is chasing her.

Reluctantly, you sneak a look over your shoulder, expecting to find another glimpse of that mask, only to find Tatum running behind you. Just Tatum. Your eyes widen in horror, taking a few precious seconds to come to a terrifying conclusion. Slowly, you turn your head forward, already sure what you’ll find. Sure enough, there they’re. Standing just thirty feet in front of you, the knife is held behind their back so that it doesn’t catch the light, gloved fingers wrapped tightly around the handle. They tilt their head slowly to the side, the movement mocking, almost playful, as if daring you to do something about it.

You stop suddenly, or at least you try to, feet sliding in front of you on a forest floor full of leaves as the rest of your body tries to stop. Your back hits the floor with a painful thud, knocking the breath out of your chest as you stare up dazedly at the treetops. Tatum, for her credit, at least spares you a look as she runs straight past you. It makes you want to warn her, to finally do something to help her, but you can’t force it out of your mouth, each painful breath taking the words out of you. You close your eyes, knowing she’s sprinting right into her own demise.

Her scream is cut off almost as soon as it starts, trailing off into a gurgling noise and frantic wheezing for breath as she fights to fill her punctured lungs with air that'll never come again. You can hear the sounds of sticks breaking beneath her knees as she tries in vain to crawl away from her attacker, then a guttural wail of fear as they grab her by the ankle. The pitiful sound of her whimpering fills the air as the killer's gloved hands pulls her across the floor with a practiced ease. 

A chilling voice fills the air, menacing and distorted as she speaks. It's gravelly, almost robotic in nature, like an automated voicemail from hell. Slow, deliberate, and taunting. Every word carefully chosen to deliver a bolt of fear through Tatum's body, and you by extension. The worst part is how impersonal it sounds and how indifferent it is to Tatum's suffering. 

Only, the longer you listen to it, the more familiar it starts to sound. Not on the surface–you would certainly know that malice-filled voice from anywhere–but in the word choices, the way her mouth moves around the vowels as she speaks. If you didn't know any better, you would almost think it was… 

You sit up, finally, scrambling to your feet as you find Ghostface staring back at you. Her head is still tilted in the horrifying eagerness as she watches you, one hand holding a knife to Tatum's throat and the other casually holding a small box up to her masked mouth. She seems almost excited to have your attention, leaning back from her place on Tatum's hips to slowly raise her hand up to her mask. 

You want to scream at her to keep it on, knowing the second it comes off that your fate would be sealed, but a part of you needs to know for certain that it's Shauna staring back at you from those menacing eyes. 

The mask lifts just enough for a sliver of skin to become visible in the faint light, revealing an achingly familiar jaw line. The truth doesn't feel like a relief, even as the mask finally reveals those brown eyes staring back at you. Because it's Shauna–the girl you've spent so many months exchanging glances with, spilling your fears too. Shauna, who sits perched on Tatum's trembling form, knees digging into the dirt on either side of her hips. She glances down as Tatum makes another pathetic noise, looking utterly interested before looking back at you. 

Slowly, knowing you’re watching her, she raises the knife and brings it down with terrifying accuracy. You stand frozen in the trees as Shauna stabs into her with a sickening noise that grates your ears. The blade scraping against her ribs, you realize with  sudden clarity. You shudder, looking away and closing your eyes as she stabs her over and over and over again. She’s not just killing her–she’s savoring it, relishing every thrust, every splatter of blood as it leaves her body. Her eyes are wild, a feral gleam that turns her normally familiar expression into something unrecognizable.

The sheer joy in Shauna’s eyes makes your blood run cold. Your stomach churns, a wave of nausea overtaking you as you force yourself to stay standing, your knees buckling beneath you at the sheer brutality of it. It doesn’t seem to matter to her that you’re here or that you’re watching. Instinctively you look away, closing your eyes tightly, but even then you can’t escape the sounds.

All you can hear is the sound of the knife tearing through her skin, each stab more frenzied than the last. The squelching noises as her blood rushes out around the wound and drip, drip, drips onto the floor. Her blood is pooling on the floor, spreading out in a terrifying wave as it seeps into the floorboards. The scent of copper fills the air, overwhelming even as you barely resist the urge to gag.

You start to stumble back, desperate to get away before her attention is turned onto you, but you run into someone else. Their presence is a cold shock, one you don’t even have a chance to grow accustomed to before a soft voice speaks into your ear.

“Breathe,” Jackie says, her voice calm, almost soothing. Her arm wraps around your waist, pulling you against her as she leans her head against the back of your shoulder. Her breath is warm against the back of your neck, a welcome presence even as she keeps you captive in a moment of utter terror.

“Jackie,” you breathe out, barely audible over the scene in front of you. Your voice trembles, a mix of fear and relief fighting against each other. You know better than to think Jackie doesn’t already know what Shauna was here to do, but she’s somehow still a comfort.

“It’s okay,” she murmurs. “Shauna wouldn’t hurt you. Don’t you know that?”

You shake your head slowly, the motion almost mechanical in nature. You had certainly believed that before; even as rough as Shauna could get with others, she’d never once frightened you, but this was something else entirely. Her rage was a terrifying thing to witness.

Jackie tuts, a disappointed sigh leaving her mouth. “Don’t be like that,” she chides, her voice a mix of pity and something darker. Her grip tightens around your waist, whether to reassure you or to keep you in place–you’re not sure. A subtle possessiveness that makes you squirm despite yourself. 

Neither the time nor the place.

“Look at me,” she whispers. Reluctantly, you turn your head, just barely meeting your eyes as she looks up at you from her place against your shoulder. There’s a tenderness to her expression that soothes the jagged edges of your fear, but even that soft smile on her face can’t erase it entirely. She’s enjoying this, you can tell. Enjoying your dependence on her, taking pleasure in your vulnerability.

“Shauna wouldn’t hurt you,” Jackie repeats again, as it’s the most obvious conclusion in the world. She tilts her head slightly, searching your face for a flicker of belief, of trust. It almost makes you feel silly for ever doubting her in the first place.

The words are stuck in your throat, unable to come out even as you try to force them. You want to believe her–have to believe her. What other choice are you left with? The image of Shauna wild and slashing is imprinted on your mind, playing over and over again even as you try to think of other things. 

You think of how Shauna likes to carry your books for you, pressing up against you in the hallways as she bumps you against Jackie. 

(The same hands she’s using to hold the knife, to drive it into flesh.)

A soft, secret smile that Shauna saves for you and Jackie, the one you only catch when she thinks you aren’t looking. A tenderness you enjoyed being on the receiving end of.

(The feral grin as Shauna tears Tatum's stomach apart, relishing every moment of her pain.)

“Shh,” Jackie soothes, her touch gentle, almost loving. “Don’t think about it, okay? Trust me.”

You nod slowly, hesitantly, not sure if you’re trying to convince yourself or her. “Jackie…”

“Just watch,” Jackie interrupts, with a reverence that unnerves you. “Isn’t she gorgeous like this?” 

The skin of her hand is surprisingly soft against your chin as she maneuvers your head, turning you to face the bloodbath you’ve been avoiding. The horror of it looms large in your mind, and your eyes snap shut reflexively, shaking your head desperately.

“Open your eyes,” Jackie says, a gentle reprimand as she taps her fingers against your chin. “We’re doing this for you, you know? You could at least watch.” You can’t focus on the meaning of those words for a second, or they’d undo you.

We're doing this for you. 

The expectation in her voice is almost unbearable, and no matter how much you want to resist, you find yourself opening your eyes once again at her command. The sight that greets you is almost too much to bear, but at least Shauna’s wild frenzy has tempered into something more methodical, something controlled.

“It’s over, see? Nothing to be afraid of.”

Even as she speaks you look at Shauna, watching the way her chest heaves with exertion as she stands over Tatum's lifeless body. You can’t help but wonder how true it is and how long you could possibly count on that reassurance.

Jackie squeezes your hand in a way that would almost be affectionate if it weren't for the drying blood splatters on her knuckles as she lets you go, nearly skipping over to Shauna as she finally stands up. You stand frozen, eyes flicking between Tatum's mangled corpse and the sight of them kissing above it, ghostly black robes blowing in the slight wind. 

After a kiss you watch longer than you care to admit, Jackie pulls away, her face flushed with a mixture of excitement and desire. “We'll see you at home, ’kay? You seem like you need a moment,” She offers helpfully, like she's doing you a favor. 

You look at her, wide-eyed and pale as the mask she's holding loosely between her fingers, before nodding slowly. They walk off hand-in-hand further into the woods, presumably to wherever they were hiding out in the first place. Somewhere, deep down beneath your horror and fear, there's a flicker of something else. Acceptance, almost excitement at the thought. 

You go home. 

Your home.

[nahimjustfeelingit-writes]

A Night Forgotten

Part Three

It’s getting more intense 😈

On top of her earlier worries, now Emoni had an even bigger dilemma to contend with: her boss/secret crush was fully awake...and back to his usual mocking self.

Joy.

What was she going to do now? Her options seemed limited to throwing on her clothes lickety-split and pulling a runner or grabbing the sheet, wrapping it around herself, and demanding he—

The toilet flushed, the tap ran for a moment, and then Erik was standing in the open doorway, drying his hands on a towel. With a quick up and down glance, he took her in from head to toe, and a slow, devastating smile crawled up his cheek. "Well, well. It seems I finally got something right between us, my precious Emoni. It's about fucking time."

Emoni dashed across the room and tore the bedding from the mattress, wrapping the soft, cool satin around her naked body.

“A-ha! So, you don't remember what you did to me last night!" she stated, somewhat miffed by the thought.

Surely it hadn't been that bad a lay...had it?

She tossed him a baleful eye.

“Months of trying to get me on a date, months of both our friends hammering away at me to give you a chance, months of putting up with that humiliating interdepartmental betting pool regarding you and my panties...and you can't even remember fucking me, can you?" She made a pftttt sound and crossed her arms in righteous indignation. "Wow, Erik!"

He laughed. "What a little hypocrite you are, Princess, since it appears you're in the same boat I am...figuratively and literally speaking," he countered, crossing his bulging arms and leaning against the bathroom doorpost. "You can't recall a damn thing about last night, either, can you? Can you?"

Her whole body flushed with sexual awareness and her nipples went instantly hard as Erik challenged her.

How was it that this same defiant behaviour during their formative school days had made her itch to cut his balls off and feed it to him back then, but a dozen years later, now it only made her want to lick him all over instead?

It had to have something to do with the long, attractive package currently swinging between his legs, because as he moved, lounging so sexily in the bathroom doorway, she suddenly found herself staring at it with an eager and lusty appreciation. Gahdamn! it was beautiful! And long…and thick…and—Whatever.

She blinked and forcibly turned away, her cheeks burning. "Will you please put some clothes on so we can talk?" she requested. "You're...distracting."

The Prince actually chuckled at that. "Am I really? Well, then I'll have to politely decline, baby girl. I'm enjoying redirecting your attention towards other more profitable thoughts."

She clucked her tongue in annoyance. "You're arrogance is through the roof about all of this."

"This isn't conceit, Emoni. This is contentment."

"It certainly sounds to me as if your ego is doing all the talking today."

"Well, it's not."

She turned back and cast a cynical expression in his direction. "Then, you’re telling me you’re not happy to swagger and strut around because you finally had sex with me after all these years of trying every line in your playbook to stick your dick in me?!”

He stared hard at her. "No, I'm not. I am, however, feeling a sudden urge to spank that ass. Care to step up and volunteer?" He actually growled then. "And for your information, baby girl, I don’t need a playbook, it comes natural. Who's the arrogant one again?"

“How am I the arrogant one!?” She shouted defensively.

“Well,” Erik started counting off on his fingers, “You find every moment to announce how I’ve been chasing after you all this time. You do it as if you’ve been playing this game of making me wait—

She huffed, he sniffed.

"So, we’re gonna stand here and act like you haven’t been wanting a nigga for a while now? Come on, ma. I can see right through you. It sucks you gotta play games when I could have shown you some things.”

He sounded a bit sulky at that.

Emoni glanced at him sideways. Erik truly looked upset by her accusations, which told her more than his words ever could. Perhaps whatever had happened between them the night before hadn't been pre-planned by him, and he hadn't been responsible for her memory gaps, after all.

“Okay…so…nothing?” She questioned.

“Nothing—well…I can remember us dancing. I remember how I dragged you to the dance floor and we Had a ball,” Erik smirked at the fuzzy memory, “You were….all over me. It was definitely the drinks because you would never do no shit like that sober, but…your ex was PISSED. We shared a drink…”

Erik blinked rapidly a few times then his thick, unruly brows snapped together. He drew a blank.

“That’s…wow—that’s exactly what I remember last as well…what the fuck?”

“Weird, right?” Erik said.

Which left Emoni wondering how in hell it was she could ever have forgotten making love to him, because that had been an event she'd ached for and dreamed of for years. That she couldn't remember anything significant at all in the aftermath was not just a maddening mystery, but also terribly disappointing to her as well. With his own memory of the night apparently lost, too, now she'd never be able to know how it had been between them. Had they connected body-to-body, soul-to-soul as she'd always fantasized, or had it been merely about sating sexual hungers and agreeing to move on? That knowledge was lost forever, it seemed, and that made her heavyhearted.

Clearing her throat, she figured she might as well attempt some civility, since he didn't appear to be at fault, if she was properly reading the signs.

“Right. So...what now?"

He shrugged. "We go back to bed."

She tightened the sheets around her with a twist of her hand, unsure if that idea wasn't the worst one in the history of co-worker one-offs and deserved an argument or if she should just give into the temptation and make a whole new set of epic mistakes today with Erik—this time, memorable ones. Decisions, decisions...

"And why would we do that?" she asked, trying to buy herself some time to come up with a third alternative.

Erik frowned at that. "To sleep. Maybe to fuck again later, once we're both more rested... Why are you so skittish all of the sudden?”

Because you're gloriously naked and suck-able, she thought, and I really want to run my mouth all over you this instant.

"Because I'm understandably nervous right now," she said instead, feeling her palms grow slick with a feverish need to touch him.

As if he'd discarded her words in favour of listening in on her more honest thoughts and impulses instead, he rewarded her with a slow, wicked smile. "Is that so?" he asked, his voice thick with lusty insinuation.

He shifted then, and it took all of Emoni’s willpower to keep her eyes from drifting downwards to seek out the slight movement between his legs again. No way was she getting caught in that mesmerizing action twice.

“Yes, I just said," she reiterated, fanning herself with a hand and wondering if it were possible to spontaneously combust.

Noting her distress, Erik’s teasing waned. "Why?

A third alternative suddenly presented itself: rationally discussing the matter to death. That's what Emoni did best, after all. "Because regardless of the fact that we've each experienced a disturbing loss of memories of the last twelve or so hours, we're both cognizant that some level of physical intimacy passed between us last night," she pointed out, switching into 'professional mode'. "Our relationship, therefore, has evolved and requires us to come to some form of an agreement and an arrangement as to its future."

"Agreement? Arrangement?" He almost sounded offended, “You're starting to sound like a wife looking for a pre-nup, Moni." He jerked his chin towards her bellybutton, and the piercing that lay just beneath the sheets that covered it. "Was that diamond chandelier in your navel not enough for you? Or do you need a bigger declaration of my intentions? I suppose I can get you a ring for your finger to match, if you want.”

She tsked at him for joking at a time like this. "I'm talking about our working relationship, you asshole! What we did here last night...this is going to alter that dynamic, like it or not."

He raised an eyebrow at that. "Why does it have to, though?”

Unbelievable! Could he not see that everything had changed?

Pushing off from the wall, he approached her, "It was about time it did, too! All this time trying to get your attention the old-fashioned way was getting me nowhere with you. Derek and Natalie were right—you needed me to act, not attempt to manipulate you into making the first move,” Reaching out, he tucked a stray curl behind her ear. "I needed to change, my Emoni, or we were never getting here."

She rubbed at her achy temple. "Do you realise you always refer to me so possessively? Why do you do that? We're not even officially dating, but you talk about me as if I'm your significant other.” She argued.

The idea irritated her, because in truth, she'd wanted him to think of her in such a manner—had for a long time now—but Erik had always been impossible to pin down. Like a male butterfly, he'd always liked his freedom...and his women. Not that she'd been totally celibate over the years, but she couldn't boast near the number of partners he'd put to bed. And all along, even when he was with those other women, he'd shamelessly flirted with her, tossing out provocative innuendo or joking propositions that always ended in her scolding or itching to slap him, and invariably nursing a sore heart. It bothered her now that he would continue to play this game with her, especially as they'd obviously crossed a line last night.

"Where's my damn phone?" she asked, too tired to attempt looking for it.

Erik tore his eyes away from her and he scanned the room until he found her hand bag tossed on the floor beneath a lounge chair in his room. He took long strides to grab her bag and then he crossed over to her. He handed it to her and watched her open it, a relieved sigh escaping her mouth as she pulled it out. She checked the time and it was very late in the afternoon. No one had called her or texted. She went to her photos and there were over fifty pictures she’d taken.

She frowned at that. This could help.

"You're welcome," he said, looking at her.

"Oh, uh, thanks," she stammered after the fact, staring at her photo gallery, “But, um...I have a bunch of photos of us…do you?" She asked, "Is that karaoke?! Wait—a tattoo parlor?!!! Little White Chapel?!!! What the fuck?!"

Erik was silent for a long while in the face of that revelation, so she glanced up at him to find out why.

He was staring...no, glaring at her chest. The sheet had fallen and her titties were exposed. Deep brown areolas and thick, pointed nipples against tawny skin.

"Take that sheet off, Emoni," he demanded with a primal look in his eye, "Do it right now."

[valuentumbrian]

How Does 37% Sound?

Image: The Schwab U.S. Large Cap Growth ETF (SCHG) is up more than 37% so far in 2024.

By Brian Nelson, CFA

How does 37% sound? That was the price-only performance of the Schwab U.S. Large Cap Growth ETF (SCHG) thus far in 2024. Over the preceding 5-year period, the SCHG is up over 140%.

For years, I have pounded the table on the theory that there are not value or growth stocks, but rather undervalued, fairly valued, or overvalued stocks. It’s why many growth stocks can be undervalued. It’s the Theory of Universal Valuation found in Value Trap that ties myriad areas of finance to the well-known discounted cash-flow [DCF] model. Growth is a component of value. Hook, line, and sinker.

For years, I have been pounding the table on large cap growth as my favorite area for idea generation (given its Valuentum stock tendencies), and I have put my money where my mouth is, too, with a meaningful portion of my net worth in SCHG. You’ll find that a lot of the top holdings in SCHG are top considerations in the Best Ideas Newsletter portfolio, too, so there’s some good overlap between what I consider Valuentum stocks and where I’m putting my money.

But why don’t I actually own all the stocks I like? It’s the question I have been asked for more than a decade. Here’s what I wrote back in September 2023. I’m an old school analyst that cut my teeth in this business following the Global Analyst Settlement, meaning I believe that writers should generally not be taking stakes in the individual stocks they write about. Writers with positions in the stocks they write about can lead to biased research, or worse, terrible outcomes.

So what’s the playbook for 2025? You can probably guess that I think large cap growth and big cap tech will continue to lead the markets to new heights. 2024 was a boring year, if a 37% return can be considered boring for large cap growth. Frankly, with the market focusing on macro data and the Fed during 2024, there wasn’t much material to write about. We all already know the story: Inflation is under control, the job market remains healthy, the Fed is cutting, and artificial intelligence will be the name of the game this decade.

I think it’s worth clarifying some of our offerings every now and then, as each one focuses on a unique vertical. For those seeking capital appreciation, the Best Ideas Newsletter portfolio may be of interest. For those seeking dividend growth, the Dividend Growth Newsletter portfolio includes our favorite ideas, while for those seeking high yield, the High Yield Dividend Newsletter may be your cup of tea. Dividend growth focuses on dividend growth potential; high yield focuses on current high yield, and so on and so forth.

The Exclusive publication is one of my favorite publications, where we highlight an income idea, a capital appreciation idea and a short idea consideration each month. You can read more about the Exclusive publication here. As of the date of the release of the December edition of the Exclusive publication, success rates for Capital Appreciation Ideas were 90.1%, while success rates for Short Idea Considerations were 88.1%. If you haven’t yet tried out the Exclusive, please do so.

Okay – so what about dividends? Unfortunately, I think we’re in for another difficult year for dividend growth investing. The SPDR S&P Dividend ETF (SDY) is only up 6% year-to-date, trailing both the equal-weight and market-cap weighted S&P 500 indices by sizable margins. With the 10-year Treasury yield at 4.6% and certificate-of-deposit rates still elevated, dividend-only-focused investors will likely continue to trail the broader markets. Remember: dividends are capital appreciation that otherwise would have been achieved, so don’t let the dividend tail wag the total return dog.

What about Bitcoin? I really don’t know. It’s definitely a greater fool asset like gold, but I have totally underestimated the number of fools there are these days. Haha. Just kidding, but seriously, with the regulatory environment easing with respect to crypto and with President-elect Donald Trump supporting crypto assets, who really knows how high Bitcoin can get or just how volatile the asset may become as institutional money ebbs and flows.

So what about small cap value? Well, year-to-date, the iShares Russell 2000 Value ETF (IWN) is up a meager 6%, and it is up just 28% over the past 5 years, trailing large cap growth considerably. With a near 30% weighting in financials and 10% weighting in real estate in the IWN, for me, it’s a no-brainer to avoid. The only way I believe the gap between large cap growth and small cap value narrows is if large cap growth falls on difficult times, which can never be ruled out. But that said, there’s no reason to believe in the IWN, no matter what the statisticians say about quantitative value. I tackle the issue of the pitfalls of falling in love with historical data in Value Trap, too.

All things considered, 2024 was an absolutely amazing year for our core research exposure (i.e. large cap growth). Do I think the SCHG will repeat its dazzling performance in 2025? Probably not to the same extent, but it’s hard to bet against some of the strongest net-cash-rich, free-cash-flow generating powerhouses on the market today. Give me Apple (AAPL), Nvidia (NVDA), Microsoft (MSFT), Amazon (AMZN), Alphabet (GOOG) any day of the week, especially over any financials-heavy index. Enjoy the rest of 2024 folks!

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[frownyalfred]

Yes but like Thomas and Martha are used to having a child! There would be so much friction in that adjustment, and would Bruce even allow anyone to care for him like that? How paranoid would be be about their safety? I think it would be so messy

Exactly! I think sometimes people underestimate how bizarre it would be to come home to your eight year old son and realize he’s in his forties and has a whole life without you — a complex life. Bruce was an intelligent child of course, but the man he grows to be is so much beyond that. It would be an insane adjustment.

They only ever knew how to parent a child. They didn’t grow up with Bruce, and they don’t know the things that have shaped him into what he is now. Their playbook for him is beyond out of date.

That causes so much friction! In some ways, it’s like meeting a stranger. Or meeting the outlines of a person you used to know. The power dynamic shift alone is a lot — he’s the owner of the Manor, of he company, and oversees the family. Their input isn’t weighted the same anymore. They’re guests in HIS home, in some ways, even though he and Alfred would never phrase it that way.

I think, after the initial reunion wears off, attempts to parent or interrogate Bruce about his decision would ultimately backfire. And the batkids would be resistant to newcomers in general, but especially if they see how awkwardly Bruce, Thomas and Martha are all trying to interact with each other. When they see Bruce trying to pull back into himself and be less Bruce-like for their benefit, because some things about him and his life horrify them, even after their years in Gotham.

[bigskyandthecoldgun]

“steve uses the harrington charm” this, “steve uses all his typical flirting playbook moves” that, give me a steve who assumes that since he’s crushing on eddie, who’s a guy, he has to use moves that girls usually use on guys in order to get eddie to recognize that he’s flirting.

give me steve thinking that since eddie isn’t a girl, all the usual flirting he does won’t work, so he assumes he should use the moves girls he’s dated have used on him instead. give me steve tilting his head and batting his eyelashes and asking a very perplexed eddie to explain something about cars or sports since “guys are just so smart about this stuff.” give me steve playing up being cold until eddie gives him his jacket, give me steve feeling up eddie’s biceps and going “wow, you must work out a lot. oh, you don’t? could’ve fooled me, your muscles are, like, so big.” give me eddie being so bewildered because steve keeps laughing at jokes that probably aren’t as funny as he’s making them out to be, or eddie being perplexed by steve twirling his hair or smiling coyly while trailing his fingers over the tattoo on eddie’s forearm.

just steve absolutely laying on the moves, but they’re not his usual moves. robin is incredibly amused and has resigned herself to eventually explaining that the gender of the person steve’s flirting with doesn’t necessarily have to change his approach (only once the comedy of the situation dies down, of course). eddie is utterly bewildered, because other than this, steve is acting totally normal.