#it’s just who Zhongli really is

[ironunderstands]

Imma say this now, I’m Genshin (although just in general) family headcanons are so much more fun than ships. Like yeah romantic relationships are cool but unlikely friends!!? Unlikely siblings???? Anytime parent/child relationships show up??? Like that shit has me hooked. Especially the more niche flavors of family relationships, like I think Nahida being scaras aunt is really funny, charlotte and yanfei being distant cousins is stupid fun to read about, Childe making it his mission to add every pyro character he meets to his roster of siblings is always sweet. Like I understand this can being annoying when people bring family headcanons onto ship posts (like even if I also possess those headcanons don’t fucking be annoying like that). However, familial + platonic ships are so much less abrasive but at the same time they have room to be more toxic, more complicated than what is acceptable romantic relationships, best example I can think of being Diluc and Kaeya (honestly I’m not certain of they are siblings in canon or not, in the EN dub they actually are but I don’t know about the original Chinese. Like honestly, I’m kinda tired of romantic ships, write me a story where Layla meets Sayu and they take naps together, Faruzan, Lisa and Miko terrorize the local populace, Zhongli Neuvillette and Venti have their stupid old man beef. Be creative, the fun shit writes itself I just wish people had a vested interest in it!

[torgawl]

this is absolutely killing me *bombastic side eye, criminal offensive side eye playing in the background*

[lovesickeros]

it is, frankly, criminal that no one has really gone into detail about what would happen in the imposter au if only the archons knew who you were..like, makes sense!! because they are archons, those closest to celestia. but the implications of an archon, who are usually very protective of their nations, having to fight them to protect the Creator because no one else sees you for who you are?? thats the good shit

like the difference of how archons who pretend to be normal people (zhongli + venti) would handle it vs archons who still directly rule over their nations (nahida, ei, tsaritsa) is *chefs kiss*

[moonilit]

Bunch of teams that i think are fun and been playing with lately just because talking about them making me excited and thats the point of this blog so:

Noelle burgeon team

(Non of these teams are supposed to teach you anything) I like Noelle, i actually like most healers so I really wanted a team of her that felt *to me* fun to play and her burgeon team is pretty fun, she is a healer, driver and shielder she is on 4p exile and a fav claymore, i get her burst before we are done one rotation and its so fun and feel freeing in a way, noelle feels so right for this team, and the burgeon dmg looks amazing lol (tried it once in abyss and got two stars but i play on mobile so idk if someone more pro can actually get all three)

2. Lisa vacuum cleaner

I Like lisa, actually every character i bothered making up teams for i do like so, but i like lisa especially i crowned her lol, its an aggravate team, but the release of Baizhu made her more fun to play, venti is much more fun than C0 kazuha especially in the overworld but if i want an effective dps lisa team it would be c2 kazuha or sucrose depending on who is available atm (with fischl ofc)

4. Keqing&Tignari team

Ngl the entire point of this team is working around no Miko in my account but still wanting to maximize tighnari team dps, And who would have thought these two would fit together :D!!

it works thanks to baizhu mwah mwah, with him both healing and shielding we are killing baby lets gooo quick swapping never been this quick swapping before

Honorable mentions go to Candace and my mistsplitter kaeya because hydro infusion, extra buff, extra dmg, nice blues etc etc i love them please send me suggestions to who else to add

Teams im waiting for hoyo to give me something for: more variations of wanderer teams because im dying here plz give me something new for him i don’t want broken dmg i want functioning funny, also double geo double electro team just because purple and gold look nice together like come on ppl!!? how are we still here-

[akkivee]

this was an unfairly good look on ichiro lol

[welcometoteyvat]

AU where xiao has no karmic bonds anymore and works in liyue’s food delivery services

idk wanmin restaurant is expanding its service and xiangling heard zhongli telling guoba (when zhongli visits the ex-stove god the conversation is really one-sided but zhongli doesn’t mind, he can ramble enough for the both of them) that xiao is looking for work, and yknow, xiangling’s seen the young adeptus here and there and he’s praised her cooking before, both she and her dad don’t expect running deliveries to be that much work (plus he can teleport, it won’t be that hard) and he’ll get paid decently, why not offer him a job? he can pilot the program for a bit and then they’ll see whether it turns out ok, the worst thing that could happen is getting 1 star reviews on sevenstars.tyv for “unapproachable and frightening demeanor of delivery guy” (sumeru scholars invented the internet a couple years back or something). 

obviously zhongli says yes for xiao, because he thinks xiangling’s suggestion can do the young adeptus good—trusty old common wisdom states that food warms the heart and brings people together, and xiao (or any liyuen) is not an exception. and of course xiao agrees to zhongli’s proposal because when has he ever refused a request from his god and savior. never! zhongli and xiangling both assure him that he can refuse or resign at any point and neither will hold it against him, but of course xiao takes his job extremely seriously, and if yanwang di- no, if zhongli daren wants him to do it, of course he will.

xiao doesn’t have any feelings on the arrangements because it’s just another thing to keep him busy lol but he appreciates complimentary almond tofu, especially since he manages to persuade xiangling to make it the traditional way he likes it and save her new and improved tofu recipes for Other customers to try

xiangling sends xiao to more remote places at first to avoid crowds, which he appreciates, one time he goes to qingce village and ends up meeting little luo again, he doesn’t even remember her until she exclaims “you’re the adeptus who rescued my doll!!” with a giant smile on her face... were humans always so blindingly bright? he stiffly gives the family his greetings, and tries to smile a little bit at the girl (she’s extra pleased by this, maybe he’ll ask zhongli whether he has good smiles or whether they look like grimaces). little luo... was it? he should get xiangling to send her some candy next time.

he gets sent to the chasm one time bc the miners ordered hotpot as an end of season celebration, and he finds a small little memorial to the millelith who died in the chasm 500 years ago. after delivering the hotpot ingredients, xiao climbs to the top of the cliff to pick a qingxin and offer it to the memorial. the other yakshas were always pretty fond of humans, so it’s only natural. 

when he gets a little more used to the city xiangling sends him to deliver stuff around liyue harbor itself—one time the delivery was for hu tao, xingqiu, and chongyun, hanging around wangsheng parlor. usually xiangling would join them herself, and the young opera director yun jin and their rockstar friend xinyan visit too, but the three were busy with their own plans that time and it fell to xiao to deliver their dinner: light translucent shrimp dumplings without carrots, a bowl of cooling soup, and filleted fish. he hears them playing a rowdy game of something (mahjong... with only three players? or maybe tcg.... but as a 2 v 1 game? he’s getting more and more confused by the second) before the door’s opened by hu tao; she seems really ecstatic to see him, except her smirk sobers up quickly once they hear chongyun shouting “hey! you stole my cards!!” regardless she thanks him for the food, and then tells him a joke that really shouldn’t be funny at all except the corners of his mouth quirk up against his will. of course hu tao notices this, she’s always been a mischievous child too clever for her own good, and she smiles even wider in return and tells him that he’s welcome any time in her house. if he brings a couple hilichurls along he’s even more welcome

and of course, a lighthearted scene where, surprisingly, zhongli also places an order, but it isn’t sent to wangsheng funeral parlor, xiao goes all the way to jueyun karst and delivers the order to cloud retainer, mountain shaper, and moon carver. they’re just chilling and zhongli is introducing them to take out. “so, what do you all think of wanmin’s handiwork?” xiao tries to leave before any of them can start droning on and on, but obviously he ends up spending the whole meal with them because nobody can escape the sheer force of zhongli and cloud retainer infodumps. the other adeptus ask after him and the meal is generally silly banter: there’s a digression on triangular cups,,,, some nagging for xiao to eat more, “look at my newest invention isn’t it wonderful”,,,,,, and other small and incredibly mundane nothings that keep the conversation flowing like the tea from their triangular cups. insignificant occurrences in more peaceful lives, and maybe xiao is learning how to fall into this new rhythm of things... maybe he even likes it, maybe it will bring him more smiles in the days to come

yknow yknow do you feel me

very aware that some of this might be super ooc especially the adepti thing at the end but hey they can be silly as a treat, cloud retainer and co deserve a bit of adeptal entertainment time

[orchideae]

1) Opens up drafts with my head empty, ready to be flooded, not knowing where I'll go. 2) 30 seconds later: Okay but I will go feral any day of my life over Perilous Trail, and the fierce dichotomy of Xiao and Yelan. While they're far from being 'the same', they both view themselves as soldiers in one way or another (it's a very difficult word to use for Yelan, so I'm using it very liberally and very loosely), they have both suffered losses on the 'battlefield' and carry the burden thereof in their own ways. And yet they stand so firmly in opposition throughout the entirety of that questline up until the very end of the 'the end of the line' conclusion of the quest. Yes, I know that she offers him her gratitude in its aftermath and it is genuine, but she still never agrees with him and the decision that he made moments earlier. It simply 'worked out' because of Zhongli's interference, he's the only reason it worked out. And it's because of that, that she doesn't give him a hell of a hard time (obviously she can't go down there, but imagine the inner frustration of severe extents; when you condemn someone who you can't even see anymore). In the same way that she would do to anyone who would sacrifice themselves for others, but in this case, I think it's 'beautiful' that it's to Xiao; the one who seems most adamant to do so (which honestly, fits into the contract that the Yakshas chose to sign with Morax; 'the ultimate sacrifice' to protect for Liyue; 'for Liyue', and Liyue has always centered itself around its people), the one who everyone reveres (and so does she, as she notes in her voiceline, 'if I ever have the honor to fight alongside') and respects for good reason, she stands against him, because in that moment, regardless of his status, he makes a call that she considers wrong. And he doesn't even... fight her on it very fiercely, and that's what actually hurts me the most, it's as if the following line hit the nail directly on the head?

"Besides, if you were really so determined to end it all, you wouldn't have given us the opportunity to share our opinions."

[hydrachea]

Damn they weren't lying Zhongli do be game changing.

[lucyskywalker]

Raiden Ei stans on Genshin Impact are literally insufferable.

Taking the fetishist people on ZhongChi and Wriothesley x Neuvilette and another LGBTQ couples as well.

These famboys/girls of Ei are easily top 1 most insufferable people in the community.

[shandykey]

sigh, time to get engaged I guess....

[xstarlightxstarbrightx]

thoughts on how the Liyue Archon quest went [8]

so Lumi and Paimon go to inspect the Sigil stuff, while Kaeya meets up w/ Zhongli and essentially just chats w/ him while they wait for Lumi, right? i feel like Zhongli, at this point, totally sees this as an opportunity to learn more abt them, since Kaeya's a primary source. definitely feels like he'd make a comment about Kaeya's pupil being a unique shape—but i also feel like this would put Kaeya on edge, b/c i feel like Kaeya,,, knows? like he probably knows the Archons destroyed Khaenri'ah, and since Zhongli's very clearly the Geo Archon (and also once a War God), it probably puts him on edge a bit? Very much like 'ur not gonna kill me if u find out i'm Khaenriahn, riiiiight?'

and then when Zhongli notices him dodging the question, he probably just pivots to asking abt traveling w/ Lumine and Paimon b/c he recognizes that yeah, Kaeya probably knows. idk, i think abt this conversation a lot, b/c it's essentially just the unspoken acknowledgement between both of them that Kaeya knows who Zhongli is, and Zhongli knows who Kaeya is. it's just interesting to me.

and then Lumi shows up and they're both kinda relieved b/c MAN was it getting a lil bit awkward haha—and then Zhongli hears abt the Sigils getting reproduced by the Fatui (this is like the ONLY thing i remember from the Sigil bit ngl) so he's like 'mmm be on your guard around them.' i personally think this is when he kinda starts developing a desire to protect these people, which is,,, incredibly precious.

it only gets better when Lumi has to sing to the Glaze Lilies??? b/c listen, guys, LISTEN ok, i feel like Lumi is a decent singer. like she's not Pro(tm) but she's definitely a lil above average yk??? anyway i like to imagine Lumi singing to the Whopperflowers and for like the brief moment of her doing it, both Kaeya and Zhongli are like 'oh,,,,,' b/c who doesn't love a pretty song????

anyway the whopperflowers are assholes and interrupt the very cute moment, and then Ganyu shows up as a one-two whammy :( but it's fine b/c Glaze Lilies and also Zhongli warns Lumi and Kaeya abt the wear and tear of working. i love it a lot b/c Zhongli's whole thing is trying to relax, and it just feels like he already sees these scars growing on these two and he wants them to not earn any more.

unfortunately, upon their return and everything coming to a head, Lumine's like 'well we can't just stand by and do nothing'. i really love how Zhongli warns her to think this through and to be careful. i just think it's so bbgrl of him guys please.

pretty sure that from here, it's just the Golden House fight. that fight actually does leave scars on Lumi's leg and Kaeya's arms (b/c he blocked a nasty sword slash at some point), but generally the fight is over and done w/ pretty quickly (b/c Lumi a tough bbgrl and Kaeya's got her back <3)

They barely have time to like, bandage their wounds before they have to go and help the Qixing, and then they have to deal with THAT WHOLE DEBAUCLE. genuinely, that entire thing was just Lumi being a badass ok. i literally would do anything for her (and so would Kaeya b/c he was also incredibly awe-inspired by how much bad bitch energy she exuded in helping w/ the fight).

and then her being a mediator??? and then her being so wise and smart??? guys please let me gush abt her more i love her so fuckin much GUYSSSSSSS

which is why it sucks that Lumi and Kaeya have to see Signora again after Signora kinda traumatized Lumi a lil bit (yknow, attacking Venti outta the blue, sending Paimon flying away, knocking Lumi out, etc). personally feel like Lumi and Kaeya are a little wounded to see Zhongli just,,, willingly offering his Gnosis up to her??? when he explains it, it kinda makes sense, but also Lumi just,,, very much feels Danger from being around Signora, so she's still tense and wary.

it doesn't help that Zhongli couldn't tell her what the Tsaritsa promised him in return for his Gnosis. b/c that kinda just left a sour taste in Lumi's mouth for a bit.

[cloudstarcats]

Sometimes I think about Zhongli and Childe and the former of the two shapeshifting to look more androgynous or fem-

And I think about Childe helping Zhongli braid their hair in the mornings-

And Zhongli using whatever pronouns because they’re too old to care about pronouns-

And Childe just buying them hair pins and hanfus and decorative combs and jewelry-

And Zhongli getting dolled up with Achilles help for night out

And just living.

[yuelun]

Have I stated that I love Guizhong (Haagentus) of Liyue yet today? Because I do, more than I can say in normal and coherent words. I don't know why adding 'of Liyue' got me feelings extra things, it's okay.

[m1d-45]

Venti Brainrot eh? I can work with that.

I've read a few fics that say Archons can change their form at will... (minor spoilers for Venti's backstory)

Venti realizing who you are because the wind seems to sing whenever you're around. It's constantly guiding him to you and actively pushes him away from the fake on the throne. He's not stupid, he sees the way the land flourishes wherever you go. The plants and wind seem to cradle you while rejecting the faker outright.

Knowing he can't approach you in his human form (he's seen how you shy away from any and all human contact), he shifts into his wind sprite form to greet you. He's more than happy to show you the love and affection you deserve as the First Guiding Wind. And so what if he keeps quiet about how much he adores the affection you give back? It's not like you mind, ehe!

-sibling anon, who also loves the windy boi

ah, a fellow citizen of brainrot city

anyway the idea of archons changing their forms is so cool actually (and maps to canon bc venti changed into this form so) and i think i’d enjoy small dragon!li as like a weighted blanket pls and thank

but back to the prompt: yes. so much yes.

he’s already tuned into nature quite well, so he can hears how the harmonies turn discordant around the throne room. likewise, he notes that the wind sings of heaven, of liyue, sumeru, of wherever you are, pleading with him to stop the hunt. to pull you away to a castle of gold, filled with whatever you need while keeping you safe from those who dared call you the sinner.

i honestly think a lot of my problems could be solved by simply having Wisp Venti at my side, sagau or not, isekai or not, imposter au or not. like he’s so……..

he comes up to you with a curious trill, wondering if you’ll be receptive to this form- he spends his time floating beside you like one of the companion seelies, and is so much more open to displays of affection than bird!xiao i’m- he openly runs into your hand when he wants pets, he cuddles blatantly into you when it’s time for bed, he leads you towards trees with the freshest apples (or sunsettias, if you’re allergic or don’t like them) and fully expects a pat on the head as a reward. he communicates entirely through sqeaks and chirps—he sounds a lot like the mini seelies actually, at least in my mind, but it has a speech-like pattern to it—and softly hums a little when he’s asleep, like a little white noise machine for you <3

[stardustdiiving]

My friend today was like you know fern I think your genshin favs are really funny because to me they’re all very tame green flags that have good vibes and then there’s zhongxiao which everyone hates. And I was like. WELL…..YES….SNUCHFJFJCNC

[totally-not-childe]

i know a lot of people know that zhongli - or more likely, the geo archon - prioritizes contracts, but it makes me think of how many times he's seen a contract broken, whether on accident, purpose, or forced to do so by another party or by someone's circumstances, and had to punish them. like - we all know the "wrath of the rock," the iconic line in which i've seen countless times, and that both zhongli and his life as the former geo archon stresses the importance of promises and contracts, and he goes out of his way to say that his word is "solid as stone." hell, even liyue harbor is the city of contracts. which leads me to my previous point: how many times has he seen betrayals of contracts happened, or even had it happened to himself? how many times has he had to punish someone due to a contract, even if the person was forced, or even not being able to meet their contract due to something unforeseen happening, such as poverty or an accident? how many times has he had to punish an innocent person because they were forced by someone else, the blame entirely off of them, because the actions they were forced to do fell under a contract? he must had have to punish people like this more than once, especially if he was one of the more hands-on archons. how much pain has he gone through throughout the ages just by punishing people due to contracts?

especially when he has a near perfect memory; he's remembered all the pain he's inflicted onto near completely innocent mortals.