#it’s just so hopeless

[nightlilly0110]

Saw a take where someone said that they preferred the way the villains went out because they “chose to be themselves rather than be forcefully redeemed” and like. No shade to this person for their opinion but that’s not how it works. Firstly, what this person meant by forcefully redeemed was being saved. Having the villains be saved does not equal redemption. It’s the start of a potential redemption, but it’s not a sudden “Bam! You’re a good guy now!” (*stares holes into Endeavour*). Having that good ending for them also isn’t out of character, forced, or out of nowhere for them either. Shigaraki cares about the League enough to consider their feelings when making his plans. They go out of their way to get revenge on Overhaul for Magne’s death. Dabi loved his father so much as a child that he wanted to make him proud and let it consume him. Toga sacrificed herself for Uraraka. They’re not unloving. They’re not cruel. They could have had that good ending if the story had given them the space for it.

What I understood as “being saved” was being helped from the horrible situations they found themselves in, having the heroes listen to what they were saying about society leaving them to rot and going “oh that’s horrible we should fix this.” “Being saved” is the heroes looking at the villains (not counting AFO because he’s just evil for the sake of being evil) and going “they’re people just like us and society has failed them.” We got a little bit of that with Uraraka, but she couldn’t save Toga.

I understand that, by the end of the manga, it would be a very hard thing to do to have such a hard tone shift from “we need to beat the villains” to “we need to help them instead” in such a tight ending window but the idea of saving as many people as you can has been blatantly obvious since the first chapter and was still present in that final fight. It wouldn’t have been a forced redemption since Deku kept repeating that he wanted to save Shigaraki. It wouldn’t have been a forced redemption since the Todoroki family wanted to reach out to Touya.

The only issue is that with the ending we got, it scrubbed away all that groundwork we got for that. The only way to stop Dabi was to beat him until he was broken. The only way to stop Shigaraki was make him stop. Why bother show us that the heroes (hero students, specifically) wanted to understand the villains, to help them, when the ending betrays that sentiment and decides that the only way is to kill them or make it so they can’t fight anymore? Why bother show us that the villains were complex people with reasons behind the things they do and make us feel for them only for the ending to go “actually all we want to do is kill and destroy and we won’t stop”? For Dabi, I get why that was his driving force, but we actually had Shigaraki say (paraphrasing, I don’t remember the exact quote) that he wants a world that caters to his desires and the desires of his friends. He wants a world where they’re happy and safe. Yes, they use violence as a way to try to achieve that, but we know that there was an opportunity for the heroes to meet them on equal footing.

I once genuinely believed that the Hero Public Safety Commission was going to be an obstacle that was addressed in regard to who can be a hero and who dictates what the rules of hero society are. By heroes or villains, I wasn’t sure, but I thought that it could potentially have been a common enemy.

Going back to this strange take I saw - no one gets to be themselves. Shigaraki, Toga, and Kurogiri are dead. Shigaraki died with his character being reverted back to the “destruction for destruction’s sake” incarnation he was in his first appearance for no reason. Toga sacrificed herself for love but never got to be loved in return. Kurogiri never really got to explore his identity and died after a shoehorned attempt at reconciling his past. Compress and Spinner are going to be in prison for the rest of their lives. Yeah, Spinner wrote that book, but it’s not a guarantee anything will come of that. We don’t even know Compress’ backstory. Dabi will live a (most likely) short life in constant pain being visited by his abuser who faces no repercussions for what he did to him. They did not get to be themselves. There’s no solace in this ending.

It’s not forced redemption if they had a good ending, but what we got was unnecessary suffering.

[nancywheeeler]

hopeless time loop. the way out isn’t to save everyone. the way out isn’t to save even one person. the way out isn’t to change anything. the way out is accepting how it happened the first time is how it always will be. that’s how you acted, that’s how they acted, that’s how you would have acted every time if you weren’t given the curse of hindsight. the way out is accepting you can’t fix the past; you can only forgive yourself for it.

[valtsv]

Internal inquiry? What does that look like

so basically i got a U in my physics A(S)-Level exam (twelfth grade for people who didn't attend school in england). which means that i scored so badly that i couldn't be awarded a grade. and i attended an academically selective school which was considered one of the best public schools in the entire country (my parents' doing, i did not want to be there lol). they had never had someone get a U grade before, ever. so i made history! unfortunately though it did mean that my physics teacher had to be investigated to make sure it was my fault for being stupid and not his for being a shit teacher.

[riddlerosehearts]

i feel like a lot of people seem to forget that during idia's overblot flashback scene he says his life has been set in stone since he was born, and that it hurt how other kids would get asked what they want to be when they grow up but nobody would ever ask him that. and he says he always just wanted to be a normal kid, he just wanted to be a hero and go on adventures, he essentially just wanted to be free to be like everyone else. his trauma doesn't only come from ortho's death, it also comes from feeling completely and utterly trapped by STYX and the expectations his family's curse has placed on him for all of his life. from feeling like the things that he enjoys, the things he dreams of for his future, do not matter and never have. like he's all but completely alone in the world and the fictional media he loves is his only escape from it all. he literally wanted to go with the original ortho, to die, and his response upon being told that he loves the world too much to give up on it was along the lines of "who would ever love this rotten world?". ortho had to tell him that he still had a future ahead of him, because a very significant part of his issue is that he feels like he doesn't, or at least like he doesn't have the freedom to choose a future that he'll enjoy. with or without ortho, he's spent his whole life just feeling hopeless.

[lotus-pear]

i think you guys are onto smth..

i unironically got invested in this HELP

[mainyqn]

A Stranger

(Happy Anniversary In Stars and Time!!!)

*whispers* hey did you know i made this for the really cool and awesome project that just dropped for the hit game In Stars And Times Anniversary that you should download because its free and has alot of awesome people behind it?!!!!!! Go check it out!!!!!!

[lets-go-banana-fishing]

I'm not the one to think that Ash and Eiji fell in love at first sight BUT YOU'RE TELLING ME THIS IS HOW ASH REMEMBERS HIS FIRST ENCOUNTER WITH EIJI?!?

EIJI LITERALLY LOOKS LIKE AN ANGEL IN HIS MEMORIES

(for reference; when they first met, Eiji was asking about guns and murder:)

[megafart1]

Fiddauthor doodles

*leaves this politely on the floor and scurries away*

yeah. enjoy ^_^

[warrioreowynofrohan]

One of the oddest Silmarillion takes that I’ve seen recently is the idea that Beren and Lúthien had it easy.

I mean, let’s take a look at Beren’s life. The Battle of Sudden Flame hits when he’s in his early twenties. He spends five years carrying on a guerilla war against the invasion of his homeland by orcs and other evil creatures; his mother and all his female relatives have to flee, and he has no knowledge of whether they are desd or alive, or captured. There’s a strange darkness speading over the forest and turning it into something out of a horror movie, a place most people won’t even dare to go into. The band of guerillas is slowly whittled down to about a dozen people, who are hunted constantly by Sauron and his wolves. Then, while he is away, his father, his uncles, and everyone else remaining are brutally killed, and he returns to find crows eating their corpses and orcs joking about looting the dead.

He carries on an guerilla alone, against Sauron, for another several years, in the haunted woods od Taur-nu-Fuin. When he absolutely can’t last any longer, he crosses the most horrifying wasteland in all of Beleriand, where the only water present is poisoned and turns you mad, filled with evil spiders and who knows what other creatures. He’s in his early thirties but he’s been through so mich that he looks like an old man. He has lost literally everyone he has ever known; he does not know if any friend or relative of his, anywhere, is still free or living.

Then he meets Lúthien.

When he leaves Doriath on the quest of the Silmaril, which every sane person in Beleriand knows is laughably impossible, he goes to Finrod, the one person he can hope for any assustance from. Finrod has an entire realm; I don’t think Beren is any expectation that Finrod will go with him personally. And what happens? The king of the largest remaining kingdom in Beleriand besides Doriath is overthrown by his own people at the instigation of Celegorm and Curufin and left with only a few loyal people around him. All of whom then die torturously in the dungeons of Sauron, followed by Finrod’s own death saving Beren.

On top of everything else he’s been through, on top of spending several months in despair being tortured in Sauron’s dungeons, the survivor’s guilt that Beren must be feeling is extreme. Even after Lúthien rescues him, it takes him a while to recover. And he still hasn’t made any progress on the quest itself!

Then they’re attacked by Celegorm and Curufin – the people who bear a substantial amount of respinsibility for the death of Finrod and the Ten, the people who very deliberately abandoned them all to due and coerced all Nargothrond to do the same, and the people who kidnapped Lúthien and attempted to force her into marriage – and they try to kidnap Lúthien again, and to murder Beren.

The fact that Beren does not kill Curufin in that moment is a deed of extreme moral fortitude. The difference between Beren and Lúthien compared with many of the Finwëans isn’t that they don’t face temptations, or that their choices are easy, it’s that they overcome those temptations.

So. Beren spares Curufin’s life at Lúthien’s urging and Curufin immediately tries to murder Lúthien; Beren jumps in front of the arrow, is severely wounded again, and for the third time since they met Lúthien gets to work healing him. Virtually all of their time together has been spent with Beren recuperating from physical injury, psychological injury, or both.

And as soon as Beren recovers, he walks away from the one person who loves him who’s still alive, and prepares to rob the gates of Hell, alone. Because Beleriand is dangerous, and as long as Lúthien is with him and therefore unable to go anywhere safe, she will be in danger from both the servants of Morgoth and the sons of Fëanor. And even if there’s a virtual 100% chance that him walking into Angband will lead to him being slowly tortured to death, that’s a better option than the one person he has left getting killed or, worse, captured, because of him.

And then she goes with him anyway. And beyond all hope they actually succeed in getting a Silmaril - and then he immediately loses it, and his hand, to Carcharoth, and it was all for nothing.

And for the fourth time since Lúthien met him, he’s near death and she’s desperately fighting to heal him and kerp him alive, while she’s exhausted to the point of collapse. And this is the moment when she gives up and goes back to Doriath, because that is what has the best chance of keeping Beren alive.

And then, at last, a ray of hope – Thingol looks at all they’ve been through and says, fine, you crazy kids can get married. And they’ve scarcely been married yet when they learn that oh, it’s not over, Carcharoth is rampaging through the land killing people and this needs to be dealt with. And Beren, even after everything, insists on going. (Because, hello, survivor’s guilt! he probably feels that this is his fault for, uh, getting his hand bitten off.)

(The fact that the Silmaril was, for a time, inside a wolf and outside Doriath, and Celegorm, noted hunter, never got near it, is, okay, rather amusing to me.)

And then Beren dies, saving Thingol, because he knows deeply what it feels like to lose his family and he’s not going to let that happen to Lúthien. And she loses him instead.

Now let’s shift to Lúthien’s point of view. Since her first meeting with Beren she has been betrayed by literally everyone she knows and everyone she meets except for Beren and Huan. She has been treated like a child, and a madwoman, and a trophy, and a pawn, and a sex object, and literally everything except an adult person whose choices have worth and meaning. She is not a superhero; she does not know what she is doing; she is terrified for practically every moment of it, for Beren’s sake even more than for her own, and for much of it she is hopeless. She does not know how or if she can achieve anything; she only knows that she has to try, because it is better than sitting in Doriath waiting to find out if Beren is dead. She puts substantial work and thought and effort into figuring out how to get out of Doriath (given in more detail in the poetic version) – and then, just when she thinks she’s found help (note: Celegorm and Curufin do not give her their names when they first meet her; she doesn’t know they’re the sons of Fëanor), she is again taken captive, this time with the goal of forced marriage and the threat of rape hanging over her. And she still knows Beren is in desperate danger, and she still can do nothing about it.

When Huan aids her and she goes to Tol-in-Gaurhoth, it isn’t because she feels she has the power to fight Sauron one-on-one! It’s because she’s desperate and can’t think of any other options. And in fact, it is not she who defeats Sauron, it is Huan; once he is defeated by Huan, she has the intelligence and strength of will to force his surrender by threatening him with something he fears more than defeat, and to demand – not the freeing of Beren alone – but the destruction of Tol-in-Gaurhoth, freeing all its prisoners. The reason she defeats Sauron is not that she’s a half-Maia badass who can wave her hands and do everything easily! The reason she defeats him is that she shows up there completely vulnerable and in effect uses herself as bait. That is an extraordinary degree of courage, not some kind of deus ex machina. And she’s putting all the strength that she has on the line – she’s pretty much passing out by the time she finds Beren. Similarly, all her healing of him is hard, exhausting work that she’s doing despite being, the whole time, terrified that he’s about to die. None of this is easy.

Likewise in Angband – Huan’s advice and Lúthien’s magic of disguise and sleep is invaluble in getting them through the door and past Carcharoth, but the reason she is able to enchant Morgoth and cast all Angband into sleep is not primarily because of extreme power, but because, like every other non-Beren person she meets, he doesn’t take her seriously. Morgoth finds the idea of using Melian’s daughter as a brief entertainment amusing (and, if you read the poetic version, makes some truly creepy sexual threats against her), and that’s how she is able to get him unguarded enough that she’s well into her song and he’s already getting sleepy before it starts to occur to him that maybe this isn’t going quite as he planned. Lúthien’s victories are not because she’s just on a different power level from the rest of Beleriand, they’re because she’s amazingly brave and willing to walk into the most dangerous places virtually defenceless. And she and Beren rely on each other utterly – after her sleep song she’s practically passing out and can only get out of Angband because Beren is holding her up.

So this is who they are, at Beren’s death. A man who has lost everyone he loves and everyone who loves him, every friend or family, often helplessly witnessing their gruesome death – everyone except for Lúthien. And an elf-woman who has been betrayed by everyone she loved or trusted, except for Beren.

When Beren dies, I wonder if he’s even relieved that it’s finally him dying instead of everyone around him. When he sees Lúthien in the Halls of Mandos, I believe his first feeling would be not joy or love, but horror. That the last living person he loved, and the one he wanted above all to save, had now died because of him.

But Lúthien isn’t done. She goes to Mandos, and she sings, and her song says: look at what we have been through, look at what all Beleriand has been through, Eldar and Edain. We don’t want realms or glory or power; we only want a few moments of peace with each other, and we fought so hard for it, and we didn’t even get that. And when she’s offered bliss and immortality for herself, she says No, I don’t want it, not without Beren. She isn’t promised happiness or long life – she only know that for the short time she will get, she will have the chance to be with Beren. And that is enough for her; for that, she gives up everything else.

This is a faerie-story; but it does not sound to me like a trite tale of easy victories handed to the heroes by Fate or by the author! They fought and struggled and sacrificed for those victories, amd they did it without ever letting go of courage, and mercy, and humility. There is a reason why this is the story that Frodo and Sam hearken back to for inspiration.

[canisalbus]

the anon saying they wish vaschete were plushies inspired me

.

[claitea]

i've had these scenarios written down since volo's debut in pokemon masters and i just really wanted to scribble them down and finally release them

[yuwuta]

gojo would kill your work husband. but if he were the work husband, that's a different story

REAL!! he’s such a hypocrite because if someone mentioned you had a work husband, his entire world would stop and he wold devise the absolute worst plans to make sure that your co-worker, everyone at your job, and everyone in the next building over knew that he was happily committed to you 

but if he is the work husband, he’s very........ dutiful in his role. there’s a loose office/lawyer au in my head where satoru is your secretary, and for all intents and purposes, your personal assistant, and he’s good at his job, but mostly because he considers his job to be pleasing you. he has coffee for you when you arrive, he moves your schedule around without you asking, he has answers to questions before you can even ask them, he has fresh flowers on your desk weekly, pokes into your meetings to pretend to hand you a file that’s really just maybe a single document in a manilla folder with candy on top of it—he’s made himself your business, your partner; he’s made himself irreplaceable, and he loves to remind everybody of that fact. 

he’s also extremely loyal. sure, he could day a week’s worth of work done in about a day, but that doesn’t mean he’ll just use his talents for anybody. he’s your secretary, so he’s at your beck and call, and everyone knows it. they know he’s the best, but also that he’s off limits—not because you won’t share him, but because satoru won’t let himself be shared. 

he also extends his duties beyond work, of course. when he hands you a print out of your schedule for the day and you’re confused by the three-hour block of time you have in the middle of the day, satoru just helps you shrug your coat of your shoulders and smiles, “that’s for the lunch date you have with me, of course!” hanging up your coat in your closet for you, “i’m paying, see you soon, sweets.” and because you’re great at your job, and satoru helps you be great, nobody really questions when the two of you have time for a 13-course tasting menu at 1pm on a tuesday afternoon. and if they did, all satoru would say that you two had a lovely date 

[rambunctioustoons]

ever befriend the local mermaids and remember you can't swim

[runningwithscizzorz]

I feel a deep sense of anger and grief for Palestine. I’m angry at God, at the world powers donating to those who are killing civilians, angry at people looking away and encouraging you to worry about yourself when people can’t even walk down their streets without being attacked. I’m angry that my friend donated, only for it to be stolen and taken by the soldiers abusing Palestine. I’m angry that I can’t do much of anything but tell you to at least CARE about the people being bombed and slaughtered. Please, if you can’t do anything please just CARE about these people and listen to their stories. Hold them in your hearts at the very least. Don’t pretend they don’t exist or just brush it off as “its been going on for centuries, there’s no point in stopping it.” I want to do more, I want to make people care and love those who need it, rather than continue spreading anger and hate.

These are real people I’ve drawn. Keep the people of Palestine in your heart at the very least please.

[mintaikk]

Venom after abandoning his entire species and planet for some sad wet white guy he's known for like a day

[ninyard]

no because ohhhh my god ohmygod. aaron's triggers are so *specific* like it's a bathroom door not a front door. a certain type of lock rattling. rustling but not footsteps. he's a doctor he's got technical brilliance he made it through D1 varsity sports + pre-med + mafia fuckery + neil josten's presence AND YET he can't predict what will set him off. also the deep-rooted fear of being an unpredictable parent is so Him and so There. exy strength to break down the door, surgeon's perception to check for blood, and aaron has to leave.

GODDD that's the thing Aaron has always been the sane one, the normal twin, the functioning one of the family, everyone always saying, "it must be so difficult to have a brother like Andrew," and never "does Andrew find it difficult to have a brother like you?"

Aaron is the well adjusted twin. The one who kept strong when his mother passed away, the quiet child, a glass child of sorts, finding himself on this pedestal of being "the normal one". So Aaron is the normal one, and he holds himself together with textbooks and exy racquets.

But his biggest fear is being like his mom, his biggest fear is losing control, his biggest fear is his kids seeing him be the man he was before he met Katelyn. Aaron isn't always afraid of racquets or strong men or angry women. But Aaron hates when Andrew wears the same clothes as him. He's terrified of locked doors, he panics at the feeling of hands in his hair. Aaron doesn't know what he's afraid of. Usually he can let Andrew leave the table at family dinners without panicking. Sometimes he can't. Most of the time he doesn't freak out when the locks on doors don't unlock first try. Sometimes he does. Most of the time he can smell whiskey and not feel like he's going to throw up. But sometimes he just. Can't.

And he doesn't know when it's going to happen, when he's not going to be strong enough to keep it together. He can't predict it, he can't tell.

God, Aaron has spent so long being the normal twin, that when suddenly he has problems he feels like he has no right to have them in the first place. How can he complain that he has flashbacks about that night, and wakes up screaming and crying after a nightmare every other night, when Andrew was the one who was hurt? Aaron doesn't feel like he can say "I can't breathe when there's just one door closed in a hallway" when Andrew was the one behind that closed door.

Just... Aaron feeling like he can't be traumatised. Aaron feeling like he isn't traumatised until something simple, something small, something totally normal triggers him and he's reminded how this thing, this part of his life, is never going to leave him. He can save a mans life, he can give a child a second chance at living, he can move on after the toughest patient death because that's his job. But still he will always be 19 years old and scared. and he will always be locked in a bathroom, crying, begging Andrew to let him leave. He will always have Andrew hands on him and did he touch you and he will always be covered in the blood that almost sent him to prison. Aaron growing around his trauma, but never really getting rid of it. Yeah.