#it’s just difficult to process the fact that she’s really gone

[nervousyoungtwinfantasydog]

mischief mode activated

[garbinge]

HARMONY AFTER THE STORM

Tyler Owens x F!Reader // Word Count: 2.7k Summary: After a long day, you wind down back at the motel and share a sweet moment at the parking lot bonfire with Tyler Owens. Warnings: All my fics are 18+ regardless of content. Fluff. Established relationship. Light angst (based on details of the heaviness of storm chasing). No use of y/n. A/N: Trying out somethin a liiiil new layout wise for my fics! Tyler Owens brain rot is in full effect and this fluffy little number makes my heart warm.

Your phone speaker hummed as music vibrated against the bathroom sink while you washed the day off in the shower. The motel’s water pressure wasn’t the best, but you weren’t complaining, you were happy there was hot water and soap left. You were always the last of the crew to shower, while that ran the risk of running out of hot water, it also awarded you the most peaceful shower. Everyone was gone, outside gathered around bonfires, maybe fixing up equipment. Point was, it left you alone to decompress with your music and sometimes you’d sneak a shower beer in as well, you were a southern girl after all. 

After a day of chasing storms, getting dirt practically embedded into your skin, the chaos of all the voices, the engines, the winds, this was your peace, your grounding. The soft music buzzing as you swayed back and forth as the water fell down your body. Washing down the drain along with the dirty water was all your anxiety from the day. While you loved chasing tornadoes, you also fully were aware of the effect it had on your psyche. You weren’t as easy as the others in the crew. Boone loved the thrill, he was crazy in the best way possible. Lilly was a free-spirit, she would go wherever the winds blew her and thrive effortlessly. Dani and Dexter, they were too smart for their own good, every equation, every problem, they’d smile through finding the solution. And Tyler, well, he was a good combination of it all while also just plainly and simply loving it. The clouds, the storms, he found beauty in them. For him it was passion.  For you, you did enjoy it, the thrill of it all, the problem solving, the fact that it kept you on your toes moving.  And you couldn’t lie, the storms were fucking beautiful when you really looked at them. But for you the reasoning was more difficult. You wanted to help. But that came with a heavy burden, but for you helping outweighed all those bad moments. That’s how it was for everyone in the crew, you just felt like the mental images of wreckage stayed with you a little longer than everyone else. Which is why these showers were your favorite, it helped you process it all. 

“Hey baby, it’s just me!” Tyler called out as he entered the motel room. “Just lookin’ for Lilly’s drone repair case!” His eyes were looking around the room, there were tons of bags and things scattered across the floor, the beds, and anything resembling a table. His announcement out to you was just so he didn’t startle you with his presence, but he knew very well how important that end of the day shower was to you which is why he wasn’t paying much attention to the open door of the bathroom. 

Between the music on your phone and the shower you didn’t hear him come in. Just continued your swaying, letting the water bounce off your face. As the song changed, you began to mumble along, your voice echoing against the bathroom acoustics despite you only lowly singing with the speaker. 

As Tyler bent down to grab the case, his eyebrows furrowed, the left side of his lips twitched up in a smile, his mouth open as he let out a whispered chuckle. There was a lot crossing his mind at the moment. It was obvious you hadn’t heard him come in, not because you were singing but because you were singing and hadn’t acknowledged him. As he heard you mumbling the country music from damn near a decade ago he couldn’t help but grin. It was music you’d both listen to when you first started dating. The song was one he hadn’t heard in ages but when it filled his ears now, and your voice joined along with it, he couldn’t wipe the grin from his face. His head turned towards the bathroom door that was wide open as he stood up straight, the drone case now in his hand resting at his side. The frosted shower curtain tried its best to censor out what was behind it, but your blurred silhouette could still be seen as you moved your hips back and forth to the beat. That grin on Tyler's grin didn’t fade, if anything it grew bigger. Dropping the case on the bed before walking over to the bathroom, he leaned his shoulder on the open door frame as his arms crossed, and his right foot crossed over the left. Seeing you like this made his heart happy, he was no stranger to the weight your storm chasing days had on you. His mind couldn’t help but jump back to those first few years of your relationship, ones that were littered with memories of late night drives, line dancing and stepping on eachother’s feet, camping out in the bed of his truck in the middle of the Arkansas farmland plains. It was crazy that all this time had passed and you hadn’t done any of the things that made you fall in love with each other for what now he realized felt like a really long time. Your lives were consumed with this and while he knew you didn’t mind, it didn’t stop his own from wandering. His head fell down with one more smile, opting to not say anything to you and ruin your post-chase ritual. Pushing off the door frame, he grabbed the case and left the motel room to rejoin the group outside. 

Your hair was still damp from the shower, but you had fresh clothes on and felt like a new person. Quickly you tossed your shoes on, grabbed your phone from the bathroom sink and made your way down the stairs to join the crew. At this point, they had all gathered around the bonfire, leaving the rest of the repairs and work for tomorrow. Guitars of some of the chasers from other groups were playing as the groups gathered with their beers and mingled. It was one of your favorite things about being on the road like this, just random people joining together all in the common interest of storms. But these moments weren't always about twisters, they were about comradery, they were about friendship, laughs. It was memories in the making.

As you reached into the cooler, you pulled out two cans of beer. The condensation and melted ice falling off them in drops as you made your way closer to the bonfire circle. While there weren't many empty seats left around the fire, you knew you always had one reserved for you. You spotted Tyler before you even trekked down the stairs of the motel, his laugh was loud and could be heard from miles away. Your eyes had found him in the crowd almost immediately so once you were on the ground level, all you needed to do was make your way over to him. 

“Hey.” It came out as a whisper in his ear while leaning over the back of the chair he was reclined slightly back on. Your hands fell down against his chest, the cold beers you got for both of you were resting against him now. He stopped talking and looked up at you, his hand instinctively reaching up your arms and guiding you to sit down in his lap which you did without hesitation.

“Hey country girl.” His left hand caught your back as you moved down onto his legs, his other hand resting over your legs that dangled off the side of him as well as the chair. 

As your face scrunched up in a humorous and unclear look, you adjusted yourself in his lap, Tyler providing you support as you did so. 

“Country girl?” You questioned him, still confused as to what he meant. You were a lot of things, nickname wise, to him. He’d come up with something for everything over the years but this was one you hadn’t heard. 

He didn’t answer you, just smiled and placed a quick kiss on your arm before taking one of the beers from your hands to crack open before continuing his conversation from before you arrived.

And if that wasn’t enough, Lilly’s voice was taking you away from even thinking about what Tyler had said. “We fixed the drone!”

Tyler's head was resting on the side of your arm, chatting with the person to his left, although to you it was behind. Your time was being occupied by leaning forward a bit to talk with Lilly who was in the seat to Tyler’s right. She was catching up on the details with Cairo, the drone that had been just as much a part of your crew as each human member. You were so invested in the conversation that you almost missed the familiar strumming in the faint distance. It took you a few seconds but your head turned and took in the guitar players nodding and tapping their feet to the song you were just singing to while you showered. 

Your lips began to curve up, you felt Tyler’s hand move up your back, rubbing it over your shirt. As you looked down at him, your smile still only slightly curved and your eyes knowingly doing all the talking for you, his own grin widened and he looked down away from your gaze with a laugh. 

“Tyler Owens, were you spying on me?” You whispered it, only wanting this to be a moment between the two of you. 

“It’s possible.” He cheesed even harder as he looked back up into your gaze again. 

With a shake of your head, you looked away so you could roll your eyes before nestling in closer to him. Your side was falling against his chest, but your head found its comfortable position rested on his shoulder as you sunk down a bit more. “You told them to play this?” 

“I did.” He said it so matter of fact while looking over at the guitar players, his hands coming around you tighter as he held you as close to him as possible. “I came in to grab somethin’ for Lilly. Called out to you and everythin’.” His shoulders moved your face up and down as he shrugged. “Just as I was about to leave I heard this song start, and some pretty little voice joinin’ along with it.” You felt yourself get a little warm as he said it, a mix of fluster and a little embarrassment. “Got me thinkin’ about when we first started hangin’ out.” 

“S’why I listen to it. It reminds me of you.” You knew Tyler felt a little warm in the cheeks too. 

Both of you closed your eyes and just let the music consume you. His head relaxing slightly on yours as you both slightly moved to the beat. You felt his lips against your temple a couple times as the song went on. Each one saying how much you meant to him. 

As the song began to wind down, Tyler hummed. “We should do some of the old stuff we used to do again.” 

You let out a slight snort, one that made Tyler laugh as well as he waited for some explanation. “Tornado wranglers by day and country line dancers by night?” 

“Was talkin’ more about the truck bed camping and late night drives.” While both of you had done the line dancing thing, it by far wasn’t your favorite event. Thinking about it, you both might have gotten more injured there than you did chasing tornadoes. 

“We could do that.” Agreeing, you still kept your eyes closed shut, enjoying the last bits of the song, reimagining the old memories you shared while now thinking of how you could make them new. “Would be a nice change of pace.” 

“I could join you next time in the shower, too. If you’re just looking for a change of pace.” His eyebrows raised as he opened his one eye to peek over at you for your reaction. 

“Could work.” A smirk played at your lips in response. It was then that you realized the song was starting over and you opened your eyes to look at Tyler as your brows grew closer together. “How many times did you ask them to play it?” You were sitting up now, trying to figure out what Tyler was up to.

His arms were still wrapped around your body despite you moving up. “Told ‘em to play until you danced with me.” 

With a similar eye roll as before, you stood up now, your hands filling the space where his just were on your hips in a slight show of attitude. Those damn blue green eyes were looking up at you with the most tender and sweet look attached to them. One that you couldn’t bear to let down so you extended your hand out for him to take it. “Let’s go, Owens.” 

His hand gripped around yours in seconds and when he stood up, he raised his arm with yours to twirl you around until you spun against his chest. Your free hand raising up to brace for impact on his pecks. “We gotta work on your balance if we’re gonna be going line dancing.” He teased you before starting to walk with you practically connected to his chest to a more open area of the lot. After a couple steps, he was turning his body away from you to lead you through the crowd, his hand still connected with yours as you trailed behind him. Once the more open area was in your midst, he turned towards you and you wrapped your arm over his own so your hand was resting on his shoulder but you were leaning more into him than a more traditional slow dance hand placement. Your other hand still hadn’t let go of his own even as the swaying began, but you did feel his other arm caress your lower back to the beat, not only in a romantic way but one that kept you both moving on rhythm. This wasn’t where you expected your night going, but you were damn enjoying it, that was for sure. 

“I know this is hard on you.” His words weren’t the ones you were expecting, so as your fingers moved from his shoulders to get tangled in his blonde hair, you frowned despite knowing exactly what he was saying and looked down to make a joke out of it.

“Pretty sure I haven’t stepped on your foot once yet.” 

“No,” he laughed before getting serious again, “I just meant, I know the chase, it can wear you down.” 

You nodded in agreement but shrugged up at him, your fingers moving from his hair to lightly trace his cheek. “Stuff like this makes it easier.” 

He dipped his head in acknowledgment of your words before letting the music take over for a bit, but you weren’t going to leave it there. You wanted him to really understand that you meant what you said. 

“You know you still keep me on my toes, Owens.” You spoke to him, still shocked by how the night had progressed. 

“Good, because I don’t need you stepping on mine.” He looked down when you accidentally misstepped causing both of you to come closer together in laughs. He drew you closer, the embrace was one that spoke so much with such a small gesture. It was reassurance, the feeling of never wanting to let you go or let go of the memories you two shared over the years either. 

And that’s when you rested your head on him, now with your bodies completely against each other, your arms wrapped around his neck, realizing this moment would be added to that list. To seal its impression you lifted your head to look up at Tyler, your eyes moving from his to his lips and then brought your interlocked fingers to the nape of his neck to bring his face closer to yours. The soft, intimate kiss was your souvenir from this moment, your way of embedding this memory right along with your other cherished ones.

Dividers by @realitycanbewhateveridesire ♥️ 🌪️ Twisters Taglist: @drabbles-mc @justreblogginfics @kmc1989 @cinderellasmissingshoes (let me know if you'd like to be added!)

[majeoeje]

Beating heart (part 2)

Laios x reader

The only right answer was you

Part 1

Is this truly the right decision? You dwelled. The scent of the sea lingered in the air, the sounds of footsteps and people around you was enough to drown you.

You were leaving everything with little money in your pockets. Your stolen dowry surely wouldn’t last that long, you thought. You hoped your parents would ever find it in their hearts to forgive you for what you’re doing. But mostly… you hoped your betrothed would not harbor revenge for you.

Imagining their kind faces turning malicious made you falter. Suddenly the eight hours of horse ride that you just endured felt more than reckless. Maybe you should go back after all.. maybe if you turned back now, they’d still accept you and take you in with open arms.

As you took a step back you were bumped into someone.

You groaned before giving them a short apology not really looking at them in the eye.

“I knew it was them!” You frozed, A familiar male voice filled your ears. Upon hearing that it was as if you were transported back to your home. Back when you weren’t promised to someone you barely know, back when beginning a family wasn’t what everyone expected of you, back when you could have dreams, back to that simple village, back home.

And then you turned around to see that it was some weird unkept guy you didn’t know

You thought maybe you had mistaken someone else for your long time best friend, but then another voice appeared

“Hey, you’re right!!” Said the female voice

You audibly gasped seeing the woman, she was still the same as ever! maybe you weren’t wrong after all. And upon closer inspection, there was no denying it.

“Laios! Falin!!” You gleamed, before you shared a meaningful hug with both the Touden siblings

You almost didn’t recognize Laios with his unkept appearance, his hair growing past his eyes while you could tell he hasn’t been eating enough let alone shower or shave in that matter. You were so glad that Falin didn’t succumb to such things, keeping her appearance squeeky clean.

“It’s been too long” you let go not before you gave them a final squeeze

"We're so happy to see you.. agh- heyy..." Falin protested, you couldn't contain yourself from messing with her short hair upon seeing her signature closed eyed red cheeks smile.

"Are you planning to sail to the island too?" Laios said. Despite his drastic change you noticed that the golden hue of his eyes had never changed. It brought you a sense of relieve somehow. Despite everything, he will always be Laios.

“Traveling together would be nice”

The tone of his voice was rather hopeful. As if he wanted you to come alongside them. And by his words alone you could change your mind.

You thought about how nice it would be to travel together. Maybe you could become adventurers? As hard labour as dungeon exploring is.. you were hoping you could have your chance in it. Maybe now you could have your own room and live however you like, And maybe you could finally see the monsters that Laios was always so excited to talk about.

Aghhhh- you were stupid. You cursed yourself for being so easily swayed by him. The fact that Laios of all people didn't even need to ask you back then horrifies you. How are you that excited to see someone?

This realization came late to say the least. Years of adventuring had gone by and now you’re here. In this very moment. Grumbling alone to yourself about your past recklessness, as your other party members just lets you relish in your own madness (they already know you had lost it so why bother)

It was during your intense thought process that you didn’t notice Laios’ hand inching closer to yours only to falter away.

He wanted to tell you that dinner was almost ready but why was it so difficult??

Hesitant he rarely was, especially with you. But something had changed since last night, it was as if the beat of your heart had ingrained itself in the back of his mind, with each closing distance with you only adding to the fire that was the tune of your heart. It slowly eats him alive, drowning him, suffocating and burning him away with its sounds.

Though it wasn’t until now as he mindlessly observed you that he noticed that the fast and loud beat that was replaying over and over wasn’t yours at all in this moment.

He brought his hand to the left of his chest finding it hard to believe that his heart would beat this loudly for you. Has he always felt this way?

“Oh- Laios!… i didn’t see you there buddy” you were surprised to see Laios seating next to you. He couldn’t be there the whole time could he?? (He was)

You waited for his reaction, but he could only sit there and stare at you like he just had a realization too.

“I think-“

“Dinner’s ready!” Said senshi unknowingly interrupting Laios, presenting another one of his delicious cooked meals. The smell alone could make you drool. It doesn’t matter if it’s a monster as long as it’s good right? You choose not to dwell on the deeper meaning, ignorance is bliss. Some would say.

“What is it that you’re going to say?” You say attention now shifting back to him.

Laios looked like he wanted to say something but he shook his head and retaliated.

“Let’s eat, we can’t have other’s waiting” he stood up before going ahead to where the others are. He didn’t really know what he wanted to say. If Senshi hadn’t interrupted him, he knows that his sentence would just falls short.

Around the campfire everyone ate soundly, maybe it was because the lack of monster trivia on Laios’ part. You can’t help but miss it

It was during this moment that he wonders what is it that he wanted to say? What is it that he discovered? He knew that it was realization and he knew it was about you. But that was about it.

Marcille felt like the tension was rather dry, so she thought she’d finally ask you a question that has been itching itself in her brain

“Was it true that you were betrothed?” She asked, Laios practically choked on his food, it’s not like he didn’t know this, but he never thought to pay any mind to your past betrothal.

“Well, it was a long time ago..”

you wave your hand around, it’s true that it wasn’t a big deal anymore in your life but it does bring a sense of nostalgia in your mind at the times before you ran away from the village

“What were they like?” Asked Marcille, you could by the shine in her eyes that she loved romance books

You hummed before putting your empty plate down

“They were sweet, lovely,caring,hard working and very very stubborn” you laughed. “I could go on and on about how they were but we won’t have enough time”

The way in which you describe your betrothed was as if you were fond of them. It made Laios a little weary somehow. Why was that? It’s not like he hasn’t met them… in fact they were a good friend of yours, despite not getting along that much with him.

“You know by how you described them it would seem that you loved them” chilchuck asked, a little suspicious

Laios awaited your answer practically on the edge of his seat. Well it was pretty clear that you didn’t considering you ran away and what not, Laios said to himself

“I did” the sound of your confirmation was accompanied with the sound of Laios’ wooden bowl falling to the dungeon floor. “How could i not?”

When everyone looked at him he tried his best to seem normal, laughing nervously and saying how his bowl just slipped past his hand suddenly before gingerly picking it up.

“Then why did you leave??” Marcille was basically starry eyed, hearing you talk about your love life was what she had been waiting for.

While Laios was lost in thought. Would you want to come back to your betrothed? If you did loved them then it wouldn’t be outrageous or even wrong to get married to them once all of this is over.. but you would still go one a some adventures with him and fin before you di right?

it’s just that by then Laios had realized that he didn’t want you to marry anyone. He didn’t want his adventures with you and Falin to be over just yet. Such thoughts of you to be wed with other people lingered on his mind and soured his appetite.

“It’s because I didn’t want that life yet you know? I just didn’t want to settle down when i haven’t at least tried to reach my dream”

Your answer was short, Marcille begged you for details but suddenly you drifted the conversation to Chilchuck’s children. Then suddenly her attention drifted away. You chuckled at her antics, you didn’t thought it as nosy really,it was quite endearing to you.

“Do you.. still love them?..” Laios suddenly asked, a little quiet, but not quiet enough for you not to hear, the tint of insecurity was more than evident in his voice yet you couldn’t be more than blind to it.

After a long while you finally thought about them once again. Those days you spent everyday was more than lovely. At the time, you enjoyed their company more than anyone… it would be a lie if you were to claim that you did not love them. But even though you were glad that now you were able to look back at the fond memories you had and appreciate them, you never once wish you would go back.

“No.. at least not anymore” you reminiced, bittersweet it was.

So many questions filled Laios’ head. What if that person were to look for you? Would you come back to them? How long were you in love? He wanted to ask one by one yet only one was able to spill out of him

“Would you ever want to settle down?” Asked Laios.

Your cheeks grew warm. It was a if… he was asking for you to settle down with him.

You mentally slapped yourself for such thoughts. For fuck’s sake that was your best friend you were thinking about! You knew him ever since you were all but 2.

You looked back a few summers back. Back when you were with someone who once used to be your soon to be spouse. Back when you planned a whole future with them knowing that you didn’t actually wanted those things before ultimately throwing everything all away. You remember all the pain, anguish and guilt you felt as you ran away. You never wanted to feel like that ever again.

But.. you thought that if it were with Laios.. it would be different. It somehow just sat right to you.

“I would like that”

You unconsciously smile, you were ashamed to say that you were excited about such ideas, like he meant what he said anyways. You then realize the gentle hold of his hand on yours, his thumb gently rubbing circles on your knuckles before carefully tracing down to one particular finger, perhaps someday where a wedding ring would be.

“I would also like that”

[justdontaskme]

Home for the Holidays

A/N: It's been so long! I didn't really expect to finish this in time, but had a spur of inspiration. For those who need a quick escape from the festivities. Please excuse the rustiness in my writing! Happy holidays!

You stood at the door, waving goodbye to your parents as they drove away. Once the car was out of sight, you stepped away from the cold and closed the door. Now that they’ve gone, it was quiet in the house, too quiet for your liking. 

One thing people forget to mention about going home for the holidays after living abroad for so long was that your family still very much had their own lives here. They couldn’t always just drop whatever they were doing to hang out with you, and you didn’t want to ask that of them. 

This year, your parents had asked that everyone in your family would be able to spend all of Christmas Day together, and all of your siblings agreed. It’s been some time since everyone had the chance to celebrate the holiday altogether. 

It was always so hard to get your schedules to line up with such a big family. Each year, some of you would have Christmas Eve available, others would have Christmas Day available or vice versa. And once in a while, you have to miss the holiday altogether. 

Unlike most of your siblings, you don’t live in your hometown or at least in the same state. For the past few years, you have been living your dream in Barcelona, playing on one of the best teams in the world with your girlfriend, Alexia Putellas. 

So you flew home a few days early to spend time with the family while your girlfriend stayed home. When your parents had first proposed the idea of a full family Christmas, Alexia was up to the idea. However, as the holiday got closer, Alexia’s media presence was much requested, and after all was said and done, you knew she’d be too tired to meet you across the world. 

After your many reassurances, she agreed it would be best for her to stay in Spain with her family this year. You just never knew that when you told her to stay that you’d be spending Christmas Eve alone. 

As of now, your parents were out to some extended family’s house, which you chose to pass on since it’d be all adults and no cousins around. Two of your sisters were out at a Friendsmas party, one would be driving in much later tonight, and your older brothers weren’t coming in until tomorrow morning. 

Even though your parents and sisters urged you to join them at their respective parties, you declined, not wanting to impose or feel awkward around people you weren’t so used to. However sad it was, you’d rather be alone tonight than to have to sit and pretend around people when you were actually just extremely uncomfortable. 

Grabbing a blanket from the couch, you wrapped it around your shoulder as you walked into the kitchen looking for the food your mom said she had left for you. Spotting the home cooked meal with glee, you grabbed it and went to sit on the couch and watch a movie. 

As the title screen played, you checked your phone, upset to once again see no messages or calls from your girlfriend. 

You knew the time difference made things difficult, but Alexia had been radio silent for a long time now. The loneliness was slowly creeping up on you as you tried calling Alexia again, just for her to go straight to voicemail again.  

It was about halfway through the movie when you heard the doorbell ring. At first, you figured it was just one of your sisters coming home early from their parties or your other sister arriving early. Reluctantly, you set your dinner to the side, readjusting the blanket around you as you went to answer the door. 

“Hola,” your girlfriend standing across from you, not completely dressed for the weather if her little shivers were anything to go by. 

To say you were shocked was a huge understatement. In fact, you just stood there, not saying anything as your brain tried to process what was going on. 

“Can I come in?”

Silently, you stepped to the side, allowing her into your parent’s home. You watched, speechless, as she set her luggage to the side, immediately sighing in relief at the warmer temperature in the house. 

“What are you doing here?” you whispered, afraid if you spoke any louder, you’d wake up from this dream, and Alexia would disappear. 

“I canceled my last media appearance and hopped on a flight to come see you. I missed you,” she answered, holding her arms open for you.

Without a second thought you launched yourself into her arms, clinging onto her as you realized she was actually here. 

“You’re supposed to be in Spain,” you said, your words muffled against her jacket. 

“Christmas is your favorite holiday, and I wanted to spend it with you,” she said, leaning back far enough, one hand grabbing your chin and lifting it until your eyes locked on one another. 

You shivered a little when she leaned down to press a kiss to your lips, her cold ones pressing against your warm ones. The slight hum coming from your girlfriend had you melting in her arms. 

“Where is everyone else?” Alexia asked, stepping back slightly so she could shrug off her jacket.

“They had plans,” you explained, looking at the floor, slightly embarrassed to admit that you were here alone. Sensing this, Alexia immediately pulled you back into her arms, quietly assuring you that she was here now. “What about your mom and Alba? I thought you were spending it with them?”

“We agreed we’d celebrate when you and I get back, but they understood how much I wanted to be with you.” 

“You’re such a softy, Ale,” you teased, secretly overjoyed by her decision to hop on a last minute flight to be with you. 

“Only for you, mi amor.”

“I missed you,” you muttered into her shirt, squeezing her extra tight to express your gratitude for her last minute sacrifice. 

She left a soft kiss against the top of your head before toeing off her shoes and leading you back to the living room where you had paused the movie. 

“So what are we watching?” your girlfriend asked, “The Polar Express?”

“Well I was going to watch The Santa Claus movies, but my siblings said we had to rewatch those together so we could watch the show together.”

“There’s a show?” You nodded, scooping up your dinner and settling in on the couch as Alexia made herself comfortable next to you. You offered her some of your mom’s dinner, which she quickly opened her mouth for as you fed her a bite. 

You sat there cuddled on the couch, watching movie after movie, taking the time to explain the cultural differences of Christmas in the U.S. and Spain. 

Eventually, you saw how hard Alexia was fighting to stay awake, so without a word you shut off the TV, standing up and offering your hand to her. Gratefully, she took it and allowed you to walk her up to your childhood bedroom. 

You couldn’t even describe how good it felt to have her sleeping next to you that night. 

****

To no one’s surprise, you were the last one awake the next morning, with the rest of your siblings and their families finally making an appearance before you came down. Though they were surprised to find you coming down the stairs with your girlfriend following behind you. But nonetheless, they greeted her with arms wide open.

Thankfully, your family loved Alexia, so while they hadn’t expected it, they were more than happy to include her in the festivities. While the language barrier was still there, and the mistranslations were only funny to you since you were now pretty fluent in both Spanish and English, both parties did their best. Alexia got to practice her English, and your family got to learn new Spanish words. 

After making your rounds of hellos to everyone, you finally took a seat at the table, waiting for the hearty breakfast cooked entirely by your mom and your brother who came in extra early for this. 

While Alexia had a very loving and close family, she didn’t have one as big as yours. She loved to watch you messing around with your siblings, all of you bonding a lot more now in your older age than when you were kids. 

The house was filled with so much noise. Your nieces and nephews were running around the house, playing and chasing after one another. Your parents were catching up with your sister-in-laws. And you and your siblings were laughing and yelling at one another between bites of food. 

It was fun to watch as you and your sisters bickered nonstop over the most trivial things while your older brothers watched, egging the argument on with little comments here and there. Some people may consider this chaotic, but this was normal when you were all together like this. And that was how you all liked it. 

Once everyone had their fill of food, you migrated into the living room. It was even more chaotic as everyone took turns taking photos in front of the Christmas tree. Thanks to your dad’s camera and tripod, there was a photo with everyone in it. Then it broke into just parents, you and your siblings, the grandbabies, and then individual family photos. 

When it was time for you and Alexia to take your photo, you were pretty much begging your sister to allow you to take your niece into the photo. She was the newest addition to the family, joining just one month prior. This was your first time meeting her, and you had trouble putting the little angel down for more than a second. 

“Get your own!” your brother jokingly shouted, as your sister scooped the precious baby out of your arms. 

You pouted as your eyes followed the baby, your feet moving to stand next to your waiting girlfriend. 

“Maybe we will,” Ale shouted back at him, wrapping you tight in her arms. 

“Yeah!” you said, instantly brightening up and then turning to stick your tongue out at your brother. “What she said.”

The others laughed as your dad started clicking away at the camera. 

“We’re still waiting for a wedding invitation,” your baby sister said, causing the others to agree. 

“And I’m still waiting for a ring,” you told them, looking pointedly at your girlfriend, who instantly turned red at the attention as all eyes were now on her. 

“We’ll get there,” she answered vaguely. “Soon, I promise.”

As soon as the last picture was taken, everyone swarmed the tree to open presents. As tradition dictated, the grandbabies were first to open their gifts. 

There was nothing better than seeing all your nieces and nephews eyes shining bright with excitement as they all sat next to each other with presents in hand. Each new gift they opened was met with lots of thanks and instant show-and-tell. 

Eventually, all the kids opened their gifts and vacated the living room with their new toys in tow as the adults waited their turn. You and your siblings presented your gifts to your mom and dad, deciding it was best to all chip in for one large present. After that, you and your siblings exchanged presents, most of them gag gifts as you all had an unspoken competition agreement that the one that elicited the biggest laugh won. 

After your older sister won for the second time in a row, everyone dispersed to do their own things.

You were just about to go and snatch the baby again, but a hand pulled you back before you could escape. 

“Wait, mi amor. You still have one more present,” Alexia said, her other hand hiding behind her back. 

“Huh? I thought you and I agreed we’d do presents when I got back because I left your present back home,” you whined quietly, finding it unfair you weren’t able to give Alexia her gift right now.

“I can wait to open mine, but I really, really want to see you open yours,” she said, pulling the gift from behind her back, revealing a nicely sealed envelope. “Merry Christmas, mi vida.”

Carefully, you took the envelope from her, eyeing her suspiciously as you carefully opened it. 

Your eyes rose in confusion when you noticed they were plane tickets for the break just after the season finishes. The second you saw that they were tickets to Hawaii, you teared up.

Unknown to everyone else, you and Alexia had extensive talks about the future and what that entailed. Alexia always said that when she planned to propose, you would know relatively when and where, but not how. One night, you and Alexia had been lying in bed, and she told you that she would propose in Hawaii but gave you nothing else. 

She wanted you to have a heads up when it was coming, but also keep you on your toes. And this 14-day trip would do the trick because you wouldn’t know if it would happen at the beginning, middle, or end of the trip, let alone what Alexia would concoct to make it special. Yet you knew that as soon as you got back on the plane heading home, you’d have a ring on your finger and a fiancée by your side. 

“Are you serious right now?” you said, choked up with emotion, glad that everyone was scattered around the house and couldn’t see you cry. 

“So serious, mi amor,” she stepped up, cradling your face in her hands, “It’s been a long time coming, no?”

“Can’t wait,” you said, leaning forward to capture her lips in a passionate kiss that usually wouldn’t be appropriate in front of your family. But in that second, you didn’t care. You just needed her to know how much you cared for her, “I love you so much.”

“Me too,” she said, her grin mischievous and a laugh tumbling out of her mouth as you pushed away from her. “I’m kidding,” she said, pulling you back into her embrace.

“You better be,” you said, willingly falling back into her arms, but still refusing to look at her. 

“I am. Te amo mucho, mi corazón.”

You pretended to still be disinterested in her antics, but she wore you down with kisses everywhere her lips could reach. 

“I’ll forgive you this time, but only because you promised me a ring,” you teased, pecking her lips softly. 

“I can deal with that.”

“Merry Christmas, Ale. Thank you for being here,” you said, hiding your face in her neck as you started to sway with her to the Christmas music playing in the background. 

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

[lonelystarrs]

Bathbomb

Blue Lock - Barou Shouei x FemReader

Barou was shit with expressing himself and even worse with words, good job you had the skills he lacked even if they reduced him to a sub.

Word count: 3.1k

Warnings: 18+ MDNI • aged up characters to mid 20’s • blue lock is in the past & in soccer careers. Handjobs (male receiving) • smut • slight angst with comfort on Barou but he pays for his attitude in the best way • established relationships • fluff •

A difficult start to the week brought a stand off between Barou and you, this wasn’t the first time and as far as you were concerned it certainly wasn’t the last. As heavenly as that mouth of his could be, it could get vicious and when it mixed with his ego it was a nasty combination. Most the time Barou would insult his way through conversations but still do caring things on the side, shit with words and great with actions. This time his words went too far, you weren’t hurt but you were intrigued to see if he could live up to them.

You’d only jokingly said you dunno what he’d do with it you, his reply?

“A king doesn’t need a queen, I’d be fucking fine!”

The man did things his own way on or off the field and you very much let him take his lead to realise his own mistakes, you weren’t about to waste your time fighting his stubborn ass. You’d known him too long, been with him too long. Playing him at your own game was the way to win with him, Barou needed to nose dive before he started to reflect. He had a system for everything -cleaning, bathing, working out even his emotions and thought process.

You just had to wait out his little system with your own.

Barou however, didn’t know that -yet. Only that you’d gone almost a full week now without talking to him and he was getting in his head -she’s gonna leave.

You gave him just enough to think he had an opening but then you shut it down immediately after.

His stubbornness lived to it’s reputation on day one… you didn’t wanna talk? Fine. He wasn’t breaking a sweat over it.

That very much started to change by day two of you ignoring him because he started to fidget, you’d happily slept on the couch and Barou let you -if that’s where you wanna sleep, whatever that’s your choice. He’d enjoy his nice bed all to himself without your cold ass feet pressing into him cause you thought it was funny.

But it wasn’t a sleep filled night, he decided he hated your shared bed not being shared. But he said nothing, instead he made you breakfast before he left for an early morning run without you and returned to it still sat on the side whilst you had showered and left for the day.

The man didn’t realise his lips ever so slightly pouted whilst glaring hardly at the protein pancakes with fresh fruit and yogurt, drizzled in honey.

The next few days went on in radio silence, made worse by his 4 days away for training.

“Travel safe, love ya.”

Pft it was half assed of you not worthy for a king, for him. You’d waved your hand over your shoulder and carried on scrolling through your phone… He didn’t get his kiss either. He made it to his hotel and the quietness felt heavier than usual.

Barou > I’m here.

Wife > Glad you’re safe.

No you weren’t his wife, but he liked how it popped up on his phone -especially if others seen. It sent his ego soaring on another level different to soccer. Barou wasn’t a man with words, in fact he was useless expressing himself but his actions made up for his lack of skill there.

He grumbled and he threw the phone behind him on the bed, eying his duffel bag before reaching for it and looking inside a particular pocket.

No note.

Man you really were pissed at him.

You always left him some stupid note when he went away, sometimes a few in different places if he was gone for awhile. He’d kept them all, unknown to you, he had a box with them all in. His favourite was shoved between his phone and the case at the back.

‘You’re mine king, always.’

The words alone made his hair stand on end. Where Barou failed with words, unless he was fucking you dumb, you certainly were good with them.

Probably too good sometimes, you always kept calm around him, and spoke calmly making him rethink his manner.

You being the only one who stood up to him in a way that made him enjoy it -that made him respect you.

Barou Shouei wasn’t scared of anyone knowing he respected his woman and he wasn’t scared of letting everyone know you were his. Those shitty names and degrading he called people on the field?

Words like that never touched you from his lips. Never donkey, peasant no nasty nicknames. Sure he was gruff, he wasn’t polite, he’d throw the odd insult -he was Barou, it wasn’t like he melted into a pathetic love struck puppy around you.

The giant grump stood and walked from his bedroom hearing his team mates down the hall getting rowdy already. Deciding to take a shower he moved to the bathroom , red eyes swept said room already made messy by the others shoving their crap where they pleased.

Wet towel on the floor, water and shower gel fucking everywhere.

Eye twitching his temper rose quickly. He grabbed the sopping wet towel and stomped to the main room, hurling it at the nearest person. The comical wet slap hitting whoever’s head, the towel wrapping around it and flooring him from the impact. -all in one smooth movement that silenced his team mates.

“When did Barou get here?!”

“You slobs! Pick up your shit you fucking animals!”

World tournament was coming up and he was getting hit hard. Exhausted from four days hard practice and shitty sleep he was on his way home. He was tense, grumpier and more short tempered than usual, that’s what made him snap at you 6 days ago.

He had taken it out on you and you were certainly living up to your reputation on having some fucking hold over the king. His lack of sleep was evident, constantly side eying his phone the last few days not actually knowing what to fucking text you because he was shit with emotions and words.

He frowned hard, red eyes now glaring at the elevator buttons as they illuminated silently as they past each floor.

Only five away from your shared pent house apartment. He sighed heavily, chewing the inside of his cheek before sucking his teeth.

Yeah, Barou learned from pain and he’d learned hard years ago when you did leave him.

You both worked better together you always had and always would. A foundation he learned at bluelock -teamwork.

The split was difficult, he suffered playing his soccer, much to his annoyance, like when Isagi had knocked him for six the first time and you suffered in your own career. You lost weight, you lost that annoyingly bubbly personality that he could only tolerate in you.

You see Barou and you went waaaay back, like before bluelock. You had always been in his life, probably more for him than he was for you come to think of it.

When you left him and still suffered? He knew what he did was wrong, he absolutely was an egotist but he was also someone who could learn and adapt to change, he wasn’t a coward. So he went after you, demandingly so, nothing subtle either. Safe to say it resulted in the most amazing sex of his life and gaining you back. But he always remembers how shit it felt away from you, especially at times like this.

Occasional arguments bloomed over the years, even now at your mid twenties and living together for a good 4 years.

But that feeling of you leaving was curdling his stomach, he didn’t want that shit happening again but he didn’t know how to reach out.

The elevator dinged dragging him from this thoughts and turned his eyes to the small hallway that led to the door.

The door you were behind, the person that hadn’t text him or answered his calls over the last five days of him being away.

It was painful, he wasn’t even angry now he was just feeling like shit. His mood and energy was spent on the field, into harsh training and now it was drained from him he just didn’t have the energy to run off this shitty feeling biting at his heels.

“Oi, I’m home.”

He expected silence and he got it, he dropped his duffel bag by the door and kicked off his shoes, placing them neatly in the place they belonged -of course.

He had enough of this, Barou never did anything half assed and he didn’t like those who did.

So Barou picked up his pace as his annoyance started to boil as he walked through the penthouse looking for you, he walked into the bedroom and noticed a dull light flickering under the bathroom door.

Opening it he was graced with the sight of you in your large ass bath tub sat in the middle of the bathroom, candles were lit and you had way too many bubbles in there as usual.

One leg rested over the knee of your other that was bent up, calf resting on the joint as your foot bounced subtly, bubbles gracing your skin as you glowed under the candle light reading a book.

He almost groaned. God you were beautiful, even with your hair in a messy bun, few loose strands suck to your face from the heat of the bath. Bubbles dancing across your skin as it glowed under the candle light.

He’d been told many times he was punching, he’d seen the articles about how Barou’s partner was unworldly. You were worthy of a king -of him, his ego wouldn’t let him admit it but you shone brighter and truthfully? He wouldn’t have it any other way, after all Barou respected his woman -the world knowing wasn’t an issue.

He is better with actions than words after all.

You flicked your eyes up before returning to the book.

“Welcome home,” you said dryly

“Tch, doesn’t feel like home when you’re acting like a fucking brat.”

“Try again, Barou.” You replied calmly, eyes not leaving the page you were reading.

His jaw clenched.

Fuck sake you were right.

That wasn’t the right approach, he’d just been thinking of ways to fix this and that’s the shit that came from his mouth?

He sighed heavily, shoving his hands into his joggers he hunched his posture, glaring off to the candles as they sat innocently under his death glare.

“Stop ignoring me,”

You hummed but only flicked the page.

“Please,” he said through gritted teeth, his eye beginning to twitch at you testing his temper.

“Look, if you’re done then just get to it.” He blurted out, his insecurities fully crashing onto him as you still ignored his attempt -as shitty as it was.

“Done?” You repeated, turning your head to him finally giving him attention, he side glanced at you before returning back to the candles.

“Done with us, just stop fucking dragging it out.”

He heard you sigh heavily, the bath water swishing as you moved. Barou turned his eyes to you when the book hit the floor, following the hand that hung over the tub to see your arms crossed over it, head resting in the fold of your arm smiling at him.

“You’re hopeless Barou, get in.”

He wasn’t a guy who needed telling once, let alone twice. He stripped quickly and in a few strides came to the edge of the tub. Your eyes watching every muscle in his body flex as he moved, this guy was huge and built like a god and it was always a sight to see. You did try your best to ignore his cock between his legs that he was blessed with, thick and heavy even soft.

He stood in his natural confidence that mixed with being unfazed about life.

“Shift it then woman,”

You smiled at him coly and shook your head,

“Nope~ you’re in front today. I’ve got my bath pillow in here and you really don’t deserve that.”

He rolled his eyes and stepped in, settling between your legs as you were left to stare at his huge back. Your knees half bent up and resting beside his ribs, wanting to just wrap your arms around him and hug the shit out of him but you refrained.

He sighed heavily as the water soothed him, your smooth skin gracing his sides and despite the small touch it was enough to ease that crappy feeling in his stomach.

“Why is it you women gotta have the water so shittin’ hot?” He grumbled, seeing his skin turn slightly red already, the steam dancing against the candle light.

Your hands gripped his shoulders to pull him back to lean against you, his head resting against your breasts using them as a cushion and you began to comb his hair with your fingers.

“Oh? You shared baths with many women, Sho?”

“Don’t ask stupid fucking questions, know full well s’only been you.”

“I don’t doubt it, you scare off most people.”

Silence consumed you comfortably as you combed his hair until it fell out from its shape, dark locks floating in the water around his shoulders and against your breasts.

“Read it somewhere,”

“What?”

“I read it somewhere and the peasants -they’re always talkin’ shit in the locker rooms.”

You kissed his temple whilst laughing lightly, giving his scalp a nice scratch.

“I didn’t doubt you, if anything you’re too loyal.”

Barou sneered, his hands moving to your legs giving them a squeeze before using his thumbs to rub circles into the muscle of your calves.

“You’re completely oblivious to girls hitting on you. Still makes me laugh when that girl tried giving you her number in that cafe on a napkin and you used it to clean your hands thinking she was the waitress without even looking at her.”

You couldn’t see the smirk twitching at his mouth, but he enjoyed the feel of you laughing under him. It was true, he’d often just glare at everyone and look down on them regardless of gender. He simply didn’t care about anyone else unless it was himself, soccer and you. Eh and his lil sisters.

And cleaning of course.

Maybe pudding too.

“-I literally left you for five minutes to get a spoon and you got hit on.” You finished.

Your lips touched his skin again and he exhaled heavily as you tugged his hair to tilt his head back, trailing kisses to his strong jawline.

“But you’re just such a good boy,”

That did it.

He groaned, his cock twitched as you continued to place wet, loving kisses whilst massaging his scalp and pulling his hair.

He held his breath as your spare hand ran down his front, you pulled his hair back harshly to expose his neck, a growl left his throat and his hands tightened on your legs. Your teeth grazed his Adam’s apple, tongue working against his sweet spot beside it.

“Shit,” he husked, the vibrate felt against your tongue as he spoke.

It didn’t take long for his dick to rise from the water, resting heavy on his stomach tip easily reaching his belly button. Your fingers danced around his six pack, short acrylics grazing the tip. His hips rose slightly to encourage your touch and you allowed it, wrapping your fingers around him upside down into a fist you used your palm to rub the head of his dick as you stroked downwards. Palm giving him constant friction under the bulb of his head, precum smearing to aid it.

The growl in his throat was enough to make you clench around nothing, his hands moved up to your thighs as they tightened under his grip and he squeezed your legs harder.

“You’re so big Sho’” you purred into his ear, he hated the nickname but telling you only encouraged your use of it so he let it slide, besides when you were praising him like this and hand fucking his cock like that?

He’d let you call him fucking anything.

His hips rolled upwards again and you stilled your hand to let him fuck his own dick into it. He was so big, your finger wrapped around barely touching your hand and his length over your palm to rub along your wrist as he thrust up. Fingers digging into your thighs whilst you kissed and tongued his throat.

Your eyes watching how fluid his hips rolled, dick moving like it would if it was inside you. The bath washed swished gently with his controlled movements. You moaned against his neck and bit into him, pulling his hair again whilst squeezing his cock harder; you felt it flex in your hand.

Sweat started to roll down Barou’s head, to his neck as he participated in one of the hottest things he’s done with you.

“You want me cummin’ here or on that pretty mug of yours?”

You smirked against his neck, Jesus even his voice carried testosterone, he was so fucking gruff and deep.

“Like this,” you murmured,

“Tch, what a waste. Grip it tighter then-“

His thursting picked up, becoming sloppy as he chased that high he was almost about to reach, you felt his cock harden and throb, his hands denting their finger tips into your thighs. His grunting picking up and you released him completely.

“The fuck you playin’ a-“

Barou went to sit up but you gripping his hair painful and forced him back, lips moving to his ear you nipped at it before whispering into it.

“Grab your dick, Barou, show me how you take care of yourself and I’ll forgive you.”

You smirked against his neck as his dick flexed against his stomach at your words.

Oh, you were always so fucking good with words.

“Tch, you fucking serious?”

“Yup~!”

You sang whilst placing a kiss to his cheek.

He wasn’t one to back down from a challenge, hands leaving your thighs he moved them, one hand fisting around his thick cock that still looked huge in his own hands. The other moved to his balls to cup and fondle, his palm rolled over his head spreading pre and his hips bucked.

“Don’t be whinin’ at me later when you’re begging to cum and I don’t let you, you’re fuckin dead.”

The pace he set himself was ruthless, harsh even and he was thriving on driving himself into over stimulating himself. His head rolled back onto your shoulder and you cooed in his ear, his stomach muscles clenching as he fucked his hand chasing that high again.

“Look forward to it, king but for now listen to your lil queen hmm? Fuck your fist f’me.”

© pharix 2023 permission is not given to repost, translate or post anywhere else.

[itstheghostofmypast]

Loyalties

Kim HongJoong x (f) Detective Reader

Summary: He held her itty bitty heart in his bloody palm and she knew that, but did she love him enough to let him win his little game everytime? Did he love her enough to risk her safety?

Genre: Hurt/Comfort Fluff

Warnings: Joong's a perv (Idk okay), mention of gunshots, strong language.

Word Count: 2.5K

Read Time: 12 min

Rating: nc-17

Networks: @cromernet @k-labels

She hated him, no she despised him, no she loathed that disgusting, horrid, weasel of a man. She despised his cheap ass fur coat, his unnecessary bling and those pants! Her blood would boil at the mere name of that demonic, immature moron, she despised every little detail about him; his angular face, his sharp eyes that would glimmer like the stars swirling with pure mischief, his light chuckle that would ring in her ears like the voice of an angel, oh and she really, really, abhorred the way he'd look at her, with the warmth of pure love - NO!

Mentally slapping herself she cleared her throat, rehearsing the first stanza of hatred that ran hot in her veins for the infamous leader of MATZ. Technically it was just two men, boys who were usually called in for petty crimes turned into men who were now challenging the system- a knock-off of any vigilante out there. Batman, Daredevil, even the Punisher, see these men had class and style- MATZ, well, they had style...but perhaps the fact that explaining how her once high school friends are now notorious criminals or wannabe Robinhood would be a bit difficult. Perhaps this little fact only added to her current presiding problem, one she had mentioned to her lover, explicitly mentioning her concerns; for the safety of his life and her professional career. Once again, that bastard let his deflated ego in the way, her words bouncing off it without ever reaching his useless, dysfunctional brain.

So, here she stood, in front of her captain, watching him go on and on about the need for order and justice, the need for law and police work, and more importantly the need for loyalty. Loyalty, a trait that was of importance, though her's was being questioned.

"Where do your loyalties lie detective?"

"With the force, Sir" With a salute she looked dead ahead, not at him, no, through him, trying to figure out the answer to this very question. Where did her loyalties lie?

"Then how is it, you've been leading the task force to capture MATZ for three years and each time you are close they miraculously slip away!" his large, meaty hands slammed on the table, her partner beside her flinching, though not a jerk left her bones. Instead, her eyes flickered to his face, instantly scanning his form, this man looked like anything but eh definition of justice, safety and security - if anything, he looked more like a criminal than that moron of hers.

"I assure you, Sergeant, my loyalties lie where my heart has ever since I was a little girl. My friendship with Joong- " pausing she cleared her throat, ignoring the way he raised a brow at he before glancing at her partner as if hinting at something "MATZ, both Kim Hongjoong and Park Seonghwa ended as soon as they started this life of crime."

"I don't trust you an ounce detective, not one bit." slumping back in his seat he stared up at her, "But the Captain trusts ya for some reason, believes you a good egg- I just think you're a cracked egg, too far gone for anything else- so I'll tell you this, I'm on to ya, I'll be watching you, listening to you, from the moment you step into his precinct ill be watching your every move."

.

"Well, that was something." Jongho muttered, closing the door behind him, "Do you...want to grab a bite or something?"

"I'm good." giving him a small smile she sat back at her desk, sifting through the papers, not a word written processing in her already occupied mind. The traffic of thoughts only stopped when a hand rested on hers, "I may be younger than you, but we're partners, and my mentor has always told to me trust my partner. "

His soft words, followed by his cute smile had her sigh in defeat, sitting back down and nodding, "Some mentor you have, huh?"

"She's the best of the best." Puffing up his chest with pride he placed his hands on her desk, "Now, what can I do, to make my mentor feel better."

"Nothing, really Jong, I- " her words caught up as she noticed something. Her eyes caught the way her system was on, the screen lit up, the mouse icon moving on its own, she was being - shit. Instantly reaching for the cable, she pulled the plug on the CPU.

"Um...did you see what I just saw?"

"Jongho, get Yunho and tell him to track whatever the hell that was."

"Yes, Ma'am."

.

The door slammed shut, the darkness just adding to her anger, of course, he wouldn't turn on the lights, no lamp or bulb, choosing to sit on the small balcony - maybe she should just push him off, the idea extremely tempting at this point.

Placing her badge and gun on the table she made her way to the small balcony at the other end of the living room, making sure to turn on a lamp on the way out. Sliding the door open she sighed, the cool breeze prickling her warm skin, a shiver running down her spine as she stepped out completely, barely missing the small table as she made her way to the seat her boyfriend was currently sprawled on, limbs extending like the roots of the potted plants behind him. His head lay against the cushioned headrest, turning his head to face her, an easy smile making its way to his face, the warm glow of the fairy lights from the wall beside him only adding onto his beautiful face, making him appear oh so soft and lovable.

"Hey babe." his words barely above a whisper.

"Joong~" she sang, slowly getting on top of him, making herself comfortable until she was fully straddling him, his hands automatically finding their place on her back, holding onto her tight, her arms loosely hanging around his neck, "Did you miss me?"

"You bet your pretty ass, I did," he mumbled, eying the way she moved closer, her chest pressed against his, fingers playing with the hair at the base of his head.

"Aw~ baby" she pouted before gripping onto the ends of his hair and tugging hard, his head tilting back as a whimper escaped him, damn, his girl was in the mood- or so he thought.

"I didn't you f*cker." her grip tightened, tilting his head further back with another tug, his own fingers digging into her sides, trying to keep some form of control.

"Why~" whining with his eyes closed, he treasured the burning sensation, his princess knew how to play and he liked it so very much.

"Did you get Youngie to tap into my system? Do you want me to get fired? Or do you want me to shoot you in the d*ck?"

"Aw baby~ it's just work." his eyes finally snapped open, standing up without warning as a high-pitched squeak left her lips, arms instantly locking around his neck, much like her legs around his waist, staring up at him wide-eyed.

A chuckle echoed in the dark of the night as his hands finally gripped her close, "Don't worry doll, I'd never let ya fall." Walking them into the apartment he looked down at her frowning, "Did someone piss off my princess ?"

"Joong, " sighing she glanced away, letting him carry her around like she weighed nothing, like she was a mere muse he was addicted to, clinging onto him, onto his fur coat- wait God, he was wearing the orange one, she hated it.

"Yes, love?" slowly setting her down on the bed he shrugged off his jacket, going to the cupboard to hang it, his precious baby wasn't cheap!

"I can only protect you if you trust me, but if you hack into my system or pull shit like that and they fire me, who knows what- I- I just can't lose you" her words clogging up in her throat, the burning sensation all too evident behind her eyes, " what I mean is" sighing she paused to rephrase, his casual attitude just adding to the frustration as he walked towards her, swaying like a cat, stopping right in front of her sitting form, "Hongjoong, I'm serious, with me, it is just a game of cat and mouse but if I get replaced, if its someone else, it'll be serious and they might even-"

"Shhh..." placing a finger on her lips he hushed her, his hand caressing her cheek, admiring how she nuzzled into his palm, "You know love, " he whispered leaning closer till their noses touched, "I am a very dangerous man, I am more than just your lover."

"But-"

"I'll lay off your system," brushing his lips against hers, "Detective." Pulling back he smiled down at her, admiring how she looked up at him with teary eyes filled with nothing but love and worry, letting his intrusive thoughts win and squishing her cheeks with one hand, laughing at her whining in protest.

His other hand pulled out something from his back, showing her the shiny metal toy of his, "If it were someone else, other than you, that f*cker would already be dead, you're the only reason why I haven't torn this system down to shreds." with one last kiss to the forehead, her lovable idiot of a man once again promised to stay out of her way, at least for a while.

.

"This is team two, The ground floor is clear."

He did it again, he must've done it again, no way in hell did he not do it.

"Team three reporting from floor 1, all clear."

"Boss" Jongho mumbled beside her, turning off his comm, "Did you tell him?"

Sighing she adjusted her bulletproof west as the two walked into the basement, "Yes, I told that bastard, my system wasn't tapped, I double-checked." Of course, her junior knew about her little relationship, she did teach him that a mentor and mentee should have no secrets, even ones like these. It didn't take him long to accept it either, saying something along the lines of, "Is he really that bad if he's fighting against a system that has failed us?"

"Because Yunho just texted me saying your phone was tapped instead. "

"I hate him."

"Team two reporting, roof's all clear boss."

"This doesn't look good," he mumbled, trailing hot on her heels as the two entered the basement, a parking lot with two entrances. They were going to split up, "We can't go empty-handed, we need something at least."

"I know. Let's split up, and be on your guard."

With that the two parted ways, her footsteps echoing across the empty parking lot, the scraping of her boots muffling the jingle of her gun, one that was aimed and ready to shoot. A low chuckle caught her ear.

"STOP RIGHT THERE." She yelled, turning to aim at the fool, his smirk pissing her off even more, "Don't.Move."

"Hey doll." the deep voice from beside her alerting her senses, "You should go check up on your partner, baby bear's knocked out like Goldilocks." Seonghwa chuckled, making his way to stand next to Hongjoong who had his hands up for a show, the smug look never leaving his face.

"Aw, come on detective, just let us go and we can call it a night."

A loud bang, followed by a series of bangs, resonated across the entire parking lot.

"ALL UNITS TO THE BASEMENT, NOW!"

.

"You okay?" she asked, pressing the icepack against the bump on his head, "Told you to wear the helmet."

"Are YOU okay?" he asked, others around them looking at their head's bulletproof jacket, staring at the four shots right across it. Though that's not what he meant, he was definitely asking about something else.

"Yeah, great actually." Patting her head she turned around when someone called her name, eying the office who handed her a phone, "It's the sergeant, detective." rolling her eyes she pressed it against her ear, "Hello?"

"Detective. I heard about the encounter but didn't think you had it in ya to shoot him. Glad the bulletproof vest worked though, you're a good agent, we can't risk losing. I take it back, you have my trust and support. Get home safe."

.

Slamming the door shut she sighed in relief, kicking off her shoes she made her way into the living room, oh? The lights were on, what a pleasant surprise, wonder what happened?

"Hey honey how was work?" she smirked, leaning against the wall, arms crossed as she watched her shirtless boyfriend glare back at her, both ignoring the other man in the room who was tending to the gunshot wound.

Raising a brow, he scoffed, "Oh great love I got shot today by a bitch-"

"I'm still holding my gun Joong, don't test me"

Slamming his hand on his thigh he yelled "YOU SHOT ME- you SHOT ME IN THE SHOULDER!" hissing in pain as Seonghwa clicked his tongue, mumbling a stay still as he patched up the hole. This was all he could do before Yeosang could come over and have a proper look at it.

"YOU TAPPED MY PHONE"

"WELL YOUR SERGEANT WAS GETTING TOO COZY WITH YA- man's a perv, I know it" he spat back, shoving Seonghwa out of the way with his free hand, earning a curse in return.

"HONGJOONG, HE WAS DOUBTING MY LOYALTIES!" she explained and pointed at herself, "AND YOU SHOT ME TOO!"

A dramatic gasp echoed across the room followed by a hand placed on his chest - his heart, mind you-, causing Seonghwa to roll his eyes, here we go again, he should've never befriended these two in high school. Mumbling to himself about their idiocy he walked out to the balcony, deciding to smoke instead of listening to these idiots.

"First of all, YOU shot ME first and" he yelled and turned to point at the balcony, "That motherf*cker shot you, not me! I agree four times was a bit excessive but hey you were the one who kept going on and on about us being too soft on ya." Turning to her with raised brows, "And loyalties? Babe, come on, I mean, you and I- like we like- I've been in you multiple times, day or night and-"

"CAN YOU NOT!" she screamed, gesturing at the open door of the balcony.

'I don't care, pretend I'm not here, that's what I'm pretending too!' was all they could hear from the balcony, causing her face to resemble a tomato, though her shameless boyfriend was as nonchalant as ever, continuing his little speech, half naked in the living room.

"All I'm saying is, I don't question your loyalties because I know you've got the hots for me like I completely get it, I'd wanna sleep with me too, but your creep of a boss knows his soggy sausage aint worth your time and-"

"I should've aimed for your d*ck"

"Would you really though? Cause I know you loyal to my d-"

"And this conversation is over." with that she stomped away, speed walking when she heard the loud cackles of Seonghwa followed by the laughter of her own idiot of a man. No, boys, they were still the same shameless teenage boys, she accidentally had the unfortunate fate of meeting in school, when she was nothing but a victim of loneliness, turning her grey dull days into chaotic, colourful ones pulled out of the ass of the rabbit in Alice in Wonderland.

[vad-hander]

YOU KNOW WE'RE NOT COMPATIBLE, RIGHT?

pairing: Haechan x reader

others: Mark, Jaemin, Jeno as Haechan's friends.

genre: smut | angst | fluff | college AU | fuck buddies AU to lovers | series

warnings: reader is mean and degrading towards Haechan throughout the fic (but nothing serious), mentions of drugs and alcohol, mentions of stealing, Haechan gets injured (breaks his leg, no graphic descriptions), explicit description of sexual interactions between Haechan and reader, unrequited love, reader has issues with showing her feelings, scared of other people's opinion, slowburn, romance

words: 13,7k

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4

“Hey.”

“Hey.” your head lifted at the sound of your roommate. 

“He's left already?” you felt your lips form a smile unconsciously. 

“Yeah, I literally cannot look into my computer a minute longer.” you sighed dramatically, shutting down the laptop on your knees after you got notified all the work was finally saved and dropped against the back rest. 

It was your 8th working session in the past two weeks with Haechan. You’ve never seen Lee Haechan so often, never had to sit right next to him in pure quietness for hours and try to have some sort of thinking process. 

It was difficult any way you looked at it and you were glad he was finally gone. At least, for the evening. 

Apparently, Jeno needed his help immediately and Haechan could never say no to a friend in need, which is a quote. 

Talking of needs, you wondered what happened to this man’s needs since having him as a working partner seemed to somehow kill his hormones. Even when you very much intentionally set a couple of your meetings in his house the boy didn’t lay a single finger on you. 

Figuratively speaking, because in fact the only thing he laid on you in those past 2 weeks were his palms. On your shoulder, or leg but it didn’t go past a teasing touch and you were confused beyond and above. 

“I can imagine studying with Lee Haechan be tiring.” she cackled, placing her body on the armrest next to you. Her hand going under her head for support, making the girl take a half laying position on an armrest close to you, almost pressing her body to yours. 

You probably reeked Haechan since the boy was practically attached to you at your hip for the past 5 hours, you were afraid she’d be able to pinpoint the scent of him, or more honestly you didn’t want her to ruin that scent with her fresh meadow scented deodorant. 

“He’s actually doing a good job.” you smiled awkwardly, noticing the eyes of your friend. A cunning fox type of stare wasn’t a good thing coming from Eunsoo, you could not wonder immediately if she saw how handsy Haechan was before he left and was testing the waters before jumping onto you with questions? Did she hear him asking if you’re free tomorrow night? Or worse, did she see him rub his face against your neck, saying he needed a break to distract his thoughts for a later on better thinking process? 

In all honesty, Haechan rubbed his face against you too many times during your sessions to go unnoticed by people around and the amount of times you were in fact ready to help him distract his brain and he never proceeded with the action made you tired, upset and even slightly annoyed. 

“What, what is this smile?” you laughed it off awkwardly, very awkwardly,  to be completely honest. You looked away to hide your eye twitch. 

“Surprised you’re not ripping hair off your head after every working session with him.” she laughed, and… it felt lie she maybe testet the water...? Did she try to tap on the fact you didn’t really hate spending time next to him?

“I-, he-, it’s funny to say, he’s good with academic studies, apparently, and if he’s not just typing gibberish into the laptop I think we might even be one of the top students.” you chuckled. “Oh, by the way, we left some food in the fridge, if you’re hungry.”

“We?” she teased with a smirk.

“My God, Eunsoo.” your eyes rolled backwards.

“No, it’s a good thing, I guess.”

“What is a good thing?”

“We’re not hating on Haechan anymore, right?” 

“I don’t think anybody actually really hated him in our friend group... except for Sua?" your thoughts trailed off before you got back "Why are you asking, anyway?”

“Ugh-agh.” she swallowed and fixed the hair on her head. 

“You’ve got something you wanted to say, don't you?” 

“Me? No? I was just testing the waters.“ your heart missed a beat because you were totally right. You cleared your throat in an attempt to unnoticeably calm your heart down.   

“Testing the waters, huh?“ still, you couldn’t keep yourself from shuffling, having to stand up and actually move around the room to not seem suspicious to your friend that acted way too suspicious herself. 

“Since you two are seem to be more friendly than before, not to jump far too ahead, but we all can be… friends… now?” she questioned, shaking her head a little as if the thought alone was still a little bewildering to her. It did seem bewildering to you too, every one of you being close to each other, being friends. “I thought I could ask you once again if you’d like to go on the boat trip that happens to be next weekend?“

“I don’t know.“ You shook your head with no answer. 

Maybe you should come, for your friends, for Eunsoo, not mind Haechan, his presence and presence of all his friends. At the end of the day, you don’t even have to look at each other, but on the other hand avoiding him could give him the wrong idea, the idea that your feelings for him have changed?

“Ya, look.” Eunsoo clapped, as her voice went a little louder, making you come back to reality “’I don’t know is much more of a better answer than a straight up no. Haechan must’ve shaken your ground, huh?“ her brows went up and down playfully. 

“Yeah, sure. He’s such a charming, lovely and smart guy I suddenly couldn’t imagine us part ways for the weekend, now that we’re all BFFs.“ Eunsoo laughed.

“Oh please don’t go in detail about your newly found passion in Haechan, I still have food to digest.“ She gagged jokingly. “Anyway, I’ma bout to shake your ground even more.“

“I’m all ears.“ You wiggled your brows playfully.

“The boat trip is free.“ you gasped, squinting your eyes in confusion.

“How come? How’d you make Jeno agree to that? What did you promise him?“ You jumped up to your friend, hand on your heart in concern.

“Nothing, I didn’t need to-“

“Jeno himself suggested I’m coming for free?“ you stared at her wide-eyed, trying to get a secret out of her that she obviously wasn’t keeping too well. 

“Ugh, not really-“ Eunsoo tried to get an answer out of her mouth but her brain was definitely not cooperating and you didn’t want to stop asking questions at the kinda exciting news. You took a moment in your brain to question yourself. Why exactly did the thought excite you so much? Jeno was practically a stranger to you. “So did you ask him to? Soo-yah, I’m starting to think he might have a crush… on me…? Of all people?!“ you couldn’t hold back a giggle. 

“I don’t-“ The girl paused calmly.

“He wants me to come no matter what? If he’s saying it’s free suddenly? I’m sure Sua and Aeri transferred him money last week.“ 

“Ugh… you sorta got it right.“ She sighed.

“Wh-“ you started confused “No, what?“ You spoke louder. “What did he say? What did he say?“ You pulled onto Eunsoo’s hand for more info, like an excited puppy.

“He just asked if you decided on coming… I said no, you’re not going to be there so he just said I can take you with me…” she paused and then suddenly continued “Said you have to be there no matter what so I’m here asking you if you’d come if it was free?“

“Should I?“ You chuckled.

“If you want to?“ She spoke awkwardly, you had to take a step back and recollect yourself. 

“Hey, I… actually, I thought Jeno had a thing for you and you two were slowly drifting in that direction? What happened with that? Thats very out of the blue…? Him wanting to see me there. When we’re there I should tell him I’m not interested, you d-.“

“No, no!“ Eunsoo jumped up. “Don’t tell him anything.“

“Why?“

“I-ugh, he’s going to be pissed I told you, just don’t mention anything, it’s better you act the usual.“

“Are you sure?“

“Yeah, yeah, don’t go out of your way just to refuse him.“

“I-oh, okay. But are you okay with that?“ 

“Yeah, yeah. So you’re going then, right?“

“Guess I’m going, then.“ you chuckled.

“Fantastic.“ Eunsoo clapped her hands relieved, the conversation seemed too awkward for her, it could not not gut you. “I’ll go eat leftovers of your fancy lunch with your new best friend.“ 

-

From: Haechan

Great news, cupcake.

To: Haechan

What news?

From: Haechan 

You’re coming to Jeno’s little party

To: Haechan

So it’s great news now

Didn’t you say that I’ll shit your party?

From: Haechan

Aw, baby, you’re keeping everything I say close to your heart, I’m honoured

Don’t worry tho, I changed my opinion and I’m going to make the best of your presence

To: Haechan

Awww poor baby, You must’ve gotten a little too comfortable and forgot we’re not friends

it’s fine though, I’ll say hi back to you once I see you on that boat

From: Haechan

I hope you’re not getting sea sick and stuff

I’ve never done you on water, won’t forgive you for ruining my chance

And then sure, lets not talk

To: Haechan

NO

and, I’m sure you’re overestimating Jeno’s abilities, isn’t it going to be more of a catamaran type boat? lol

From: Haechan

why the caps lock you want to make sure I know you’re not getting sea sick?

To: Haechan

F u 

Go finish the project on your own 

From:Haechan

You’re not much of a help anyway

To: Haechan

And finish yourself off on your own too <3

Excuse me, I’m not much of a help?!?

Your life’s about to end

From: Haechan

If you’re considering staring at me while I actually work on our paper help, I’ve got bad news for you cupcake

You gasped scandalised and threw your phone away. Annoying Haechan and his annoyingly good eyesight, you thought, he deserves to be left on read.

From: Haechan

whoopsie, was I supposed to keep my mouth closed?

You never were supposed to text me in the first place, you mumbled under your breath, suddenly being too worked up by him. His senseless messages made your heart wake up and burn, not with love and passion, with embarrassment and that long forgotten, almost dead feeling of wishing to end his cocky smile and witty brain. 

From: Haechan

come on, don’t act like you’re surprised 

I thought you were this obvious on purpose

weren’t you?

You stared at the phone blankly, considering your options. 

from: Haechan

hey

hey!!

you 

to: Haechan

I’ll block you if you won’t stop

from: Haechan 

why?

to: Haechan 

hey

Hey

You 

You 

Hey

You

Fuck 

You

like it?

from: Haechan

okay baby go back to what you were doing, bye 

to: Haechan 

thanks

-

You reached out for the bedside table in pure darkness, blindly finding your phone. When the gadget was finally in your hands you lit up the screen. 

“Fuck”, you mumbled under your breath as the screen burned your eyes. 2 AM, the clock marking an hour and 30 minutes of tossing and turning in bed because everything turned out to be more than you were able to handle. All your thoughts and feelings suddenly were much more than what you could process and you were sincerely dreading the new day that would bring more concerns and more importantly more Haechan. 

You needed more random things to flood your mind so they’d be able to overlap the Haechan ones you had because thinking of Haechan in the middle of the night was giving you a headache. Did he think of you too…? Sometimes, maybe, at least at all, ever? How did you end up getting here? You’d chuckle if someone else asked you that question. 

Middle of the night, palms sweaty from overthinking too much, heart trembling a little because the boy you used to just have sex with smashed the lock on the door to your feelings with no mercy. 

Was he intentionally invading your inner peace? Did he want to stir your feelings as part of his stupid ego stroking, did you imagine things, come up with all that in your head? You needed Lee Haechan to take responsibility for his actions, he overstepped the boundary way too many times, now he flirts with you as an addition to everything else. Baby? Seriously, baby, cupcake was much of a better nickname, at least you knew it was meaningless and not personal. It felt like he wasn’t bothered too much to remember what your actual name was and stuck to something that made your relationship feel like a transaction. Baby is definitely giving a feeling to you, a little too intimate for your liking, it’s like he was claiming he liked you, like he claimed you his something and you were in some sort of relationship. 

What if his silly brain already spilled things to his group of friends about you and him? Your heartbeat fastened even more. Oh how you hated yourself for laying in that bed and still thinking of Haechan’s message when it’s been an ungodly amount of hours since he sent it. 

Maybe, it’s just you going crazy since that day he took you out. 

What if…? You had to toss onto the other side of the bed at the thought. What if he does all of this to play with you? Since the day you told him to not kiss you Haechan seemed to change his game, he just plays to try make you brake the rule of no kissing first. He’s that type of person to do things only to satisfy his own needs and satisfy his ego. Oh god, you had to sigh again. 

Were you going through all stages of grief or something like that? Now you’re on the demonising the person of your concerns stage? Sigh, sigh, sigh. 

You couldn’t  sigh any louder or you'll literally wake up Eunsoo. 

Maybe, at this point, you’d really let him do anything to fulfil whatever plan he had. You’d  gladly accept defeat if only he’d let you smash your lips against his right this moment, it doesn’t even have to be literally right this moment. If you’d get reassurance you’d be able to do it in the morning you’ll do anything in your power to conquer your feelings and finally fall asleep to hold on till the new day. 

-

“Just to clarify, I was staring at you because I couldn’t stop wondering, if you had brain in that head of yours all along, why did you act like you didn’t, not because of whatever you thought.” you slapped your palm against Haechan’s chest for no particular reason, it seemed to you it’ll give more effect, persuade him more you were telling the truth. A very puzzled expression on the boys face turned into even more confused one as your palm stayed on him for a few seconds. 

“Okay?”

“Good.” you nodded, and took a step back. 

“I didn’t ask. What are you even on about?” your eyes suddenly glued to his. He still was confused, that’s for sure. Well, who wouldn’t, in all honesty. You popped out of the blue on his way to the campus, first thing in the morning like a psychopath. You weren’t even sure you didn’t look like one. 

“Ugh… huh?” your brain processed his question. “What do you mean what I’m on about?”

“When were you staring? I just got here.” 

“Your message on Friday.”

“Oh, that.” he smirked immediately. “I was just shitting you, but it seems like I hit the spot right?”

“You- fuck you.” 

“Come on, don’t act like you’re not enjoying me texting you.”

“I don’t. You’re always interrupting.”

“Yeah? What exactly did I interrupt on Friday?”

“I-, I was doing something. It’s none of your business.” 

“Okay, I’ll stay out of it then.” the slight nod and completely lost interest in his eyes kind of pinched you. 

You maybe wanted him to pick on you, push and tease so he’d get straight to whatever he was interrupting but he just didn’t. Did he lose all his interest in you? Or was this just a tiresome Monday morning and he wasn’t in for the game?

You weren’t that much of a talkative friend when it came to him. You weren’t about to giggle and ask him why he's so stiff this morning. You were about to start sweating that’s for sure, your palms were feeling too warm because you maybe wanted to tell him something but maybe talking to him suddenly felt like imposing. Were you about to go insane over Lee Haechan? Over him and the fact he didn’t have a thing to say to you. Since when? 

“Okay.” you nodded too and wanted to walk straight past him, but it felt like you made it hard for yourself to breathe. “The presentation of the project is this Wednesday. I’m almost done with the slides but we need to go through the text, who’s saying what, who’s presenting which part and all that stuff.” you didn’t want to look at him anymore while talking. Why did you not want to look at him? You couldn’t understand yourself at all. Your wishful thinking brought you here in front of him early in the morning after almost a sleepless night. Somehow you thought he’d tease you and smile at you and set another date for seeing each other wether it’d be for sex or food or school. At this point you caught yourself not caring at all as long as it’s something to do with him. You could understand the change in your demeanour, but what was up with him? You really wanted to clap in front of his eyes and ask him what’s up. 

The change in you obviously scared you. It made you sincerely concerned for your self. You probably needed to talk this out with someone but the more you went through with that first sentence you’d start the conversation with the more you felt self-conscious to bring it up even as a thought that might’ve popped up in your head once or twice. 

The more you thought of it the more you brought up heaviness on your shoulders. Were you imagining or did Haechan change? His behaviour seemed colder than before? Did he change his demeanour because he felt you actually fall for his flirting and the pure intentions of his flirting were not to make you fall for him… it was to watch you be uncomfortable? 

Were you actually beating around the bush and not admitting to yourself truthfully the four letter word you were feeling towards him. No, not the big four letter word, the smaller one, but very much dear to your heart, very fragile as it still felt like early stages of processing the feeling. And even though your body might’ve not been new to it, since your brain was only able to work it out recently, your body was sent signals to act like the feeling was very new to it too, and it obeyed perfectly. 

You actually had to stop yourself, because you were starting to feel even more hot, getting the fact you might’ve looked insane by now, even. You took a quick glance at Haechan’s face, crossing with his stare only to go blank and look away quickly. Was he sensing the inner battle you had and was disgusted? Didn’t want to be part of it? If the two of you stood there a little longer you were sure you’d make yourself cry right there. Overthinking was definitely your specialty. 

“We’re super short on time, if you don’t mind splitting the presentation on your own and sending to me my parts-.”

“Yes, I can very much do that.” 

“Great, see you around, then.” 

“Yes.” you gave him a nod, you’re sure tho it wasn’t seen. Great, now Haechan didn’t even want to prepare the presentation with you in person. 

-

The clock on the wall was barely audible now that the classroom was practically packed with students. Still, the only thing your hearing was focused on were the seconds that turned into minutes. Your eyes were trained on the door and your fingers would stop fidgeting the pen every time someone walked past the entrance but would get back to work every time because every person that walked through the door wasn’t Lee Haechan. Where the hell was he? You closed your eyes for a 5 second breather. 

Finally, the clock reached 10 AM, one minute later the professor walked into the auditorium and closed the door right behind him. 

“Glad to see you all so cheerful. Bet each and every one of you is thrilled to present your work and get the passing grades?” the young man smiled and cleared his throat, making the whole room quiet. 

Again, the quiet room brought the ticking sound upon you. Tic-tac-tic-tac. 

to: Haechan

Where are you? We’re 5th to present. Professor's about to start the class. 

Your eyes raised at the door once again as one of the students ran in apologising for being late. 

“I think I’ll just go sit in the back and let the first group prepare for the presentation?”  professors eyes moved over the classroom to see the first ones to stand up. “Oh, Ms. Moon and Ms. Ong, great.” he gave Sua and her partner a nod and non-verbally invited them to the front to set up their presentation. 

to: Haechan

Why the hell are you not reading my message?

Your only excuse is you’re running your legs off to get here in time for our turn. 

Please?

You had to add when the message was still unread. Did he die by any chance? Overslept because he was memorising his parts till very late at night? You dialled the number - pure silence was what you were met with besides the monotonous rings on the other side of the line. 

You had to breathe because not only were you starting to feel overwhelmed by the end of the third groups presentation, you were realising you had almost no time left to run through the parts Haechan was meant to present and prepare yourself at least a little. 

“Hey, pst!“ your head snapped in direction of the whisper. “Where’s that little freak?“ Sua leaned over the students in front of her to hear your answer properly, but you had no words for her, you shrugged and turned away to not start bawling your eyes out in panic. 

“Mr. Lee and -“ professor announced running his eyes to scan the faces of present students. “I don’t think I see Mr. Lee in here.“ His eyes landed on you, as he called out your surname. “What happened to Mr. Lee? Is he running late? Will you be okay to present on your own?” 

”I think- I guess he’s running here so he’s not responding. Could we please listen to the next presentation and return to us later? Please?” The man looked at you for a good minute, probably debating if he should give you time or force you to do it now by yourself. Your teary eyes must have swayed him towards the first option and he gave you a nod, reading off the paper the next project couple. 

”Okay, you’re the last one to present tonight.”

”Thank you. Thank you so much.” you trained your eyes on the papers in front of you to memorise whatever Haechan was meant to talk about on those slides. You were agonising, if only you actually put in work to put everything together instead of letting Haechan take care of everything. It felt like you gave in to the devil and now had to pay the price for giving in. Your eyes ran through words but all your brain processed was either ‘fuck you Haechan’ and ‘you better show up before the end of that class’. Actually if he showed up after all the stress you went through right now, you’d choke him right at the entrance. 

Currently you were in the state where you barely remembered your own part and what was the topic of the paper at all. 

He didn't come. Not when it was 20 minutes before the end of the class, not even when you had 10 minutes left and got up in front of everyone to present. 

This very moment you were in the cafeteria with your head hanging low while Aeris hand soothed your back and Sua sat right next to you blabbering non-stop. 

"No, I literally knew being paired up with that annoying leech would end up terrible for you. Like I had a gut feeling he's going to find a way to fuck this all up."

"Haechan literally worked his butt off for that paper, I don't think he'd just fleet like that. Must be something serious." Eunsoo pointed and you almost did agree with her, it didn't seem like Haechan wanted to dodge this class on purpose but at the same time you could never know what actually happened in that little shits head and predict his thinking was like punching air - useless. 

"Yes, serious, like he has to be literally dead now for it to be serious enough excuse to dodge a presentation class like that. Did he read your texts?" Aeri patted your back for attention. You pulled out your phone to still unread messages and shook your head a no. You were slowly calming down and wished he'd pop up before you as soon as possible so you'd still have fume in you to fight.  

"Hey, it wasn't that bad. You literally got an A- and presented perfectly."

"I stuttered like an idiot every 2 words." you spoke for the first time in 15 minutes making everyone relieved. 

"If it was actually as bad as it seems to you you would've never gotten an A-"

"I still don't understand why you told that freak took great part in that paper with you. You had a perfect chance to pay him back but instead he gets an A while probably sleeping in his bed comfortably or some shit." Sua shook her head dissaprovingly. 

"Should've made him pay for real." Aeri agreed. 

"I want to dodge the next class, honestly, I wasn't prepared for that much stress in one morning."

"I can cover for you." Eunsoo suggested. 

"And I can dodge the class with you." Sua cackled and Aeri suggested the same. 

"I, ugh, I think I'm just gonna go home and stare at the wall and meditate." you excused yourself from the girls company and stood up. 

"If you want to you can have the piece of cake in the fridge." 

"That's a real sacrifice, Eunsoo, God." you chuckled and pulled yourself together. "Okay, I guess, see ya tomorrow."

"Bye, bye!"

"Don't think about that loser too much!"

- 

As soon as your feet walked up to the disagnated floor you didnt just walk, you stormed to the needed door. Even before your feet stopped at their place, your finger was already pressing into the doorbell. 

Of course, you weren't about to go back home, stare at the wall and not think that the stupid boy that stirred your insides for the past couple of weeks suddenly faded like he was never there. He was very much there and he was very much invested in getting a good grade. You heard some shuffling behind the door and as it opened you stared at the boy that never stopped you wondering how can you hate someone even more than you hated them the day before. 

"Jesus fucking christ." He exclaimed and pulled your hand off the door bell. "Why the hell you're ringing the bell like that. I'm no Sonic." he let go of your wrist to walk back in, expecting you to do the same. 

"So you're not dead, after all." you snorted to yourself and walked in. 

"Were there any signs?"

"Are you going to pretend like you didn't miss 100s of my calls and messages and didn't skip the very important class we had to present at?"

"Oh? That was scheduled for today?" he opened his mouth in shock, closing it with his palm afterwards. He was obviously sarcastic. 

"You're a psycho." You crossed arms on your chest, not planning to walk in any further into his place. 

"Why?"

"You skipped our presentation without a notice."

"Maybe I just really wanted you to realise how much you need me." Haechan pressed his shoulder against the wall and smiled at you with that sweet-sweet smile he could only muster when he wanted to be out of this world annoying. 

"You're fucking vicious."

"Why?" he batted his eyelashes. 

"I-." you swallowed. You really wanted to scream at him, get into a fight or maybe just be mean and rude and then leave but on your way here that bubbling rage inside of you cooled down a little and you just wanted to know what the fuck was wrong with him to act this way. "Why did I even think for a split second that I can rely on you or that we finally are understanding each other a little bit? You're just out of this world psychotic and I will never ever again agree on doing anything with you. Like even that thing we had going on - it's over. I don't want you lay a single finger on me after that stress you put me through." You wanted to say more but he was quiete and almost dead with the face expression so you decided on turning around and walking away. "oh, by the way, I got you an A so don't you worry bout your grades baby boy." you let him know before walking out and smashing the door after. 

- 

When you smashed that door you hoped whole heartedly he'd pull you back in by the wrist and explain himself like all those male leads in romcoms do. And you would fotgive him and he'd pull you into a hug and give you that very much wanted kiss you've been thinking of for the past few weeks. You were in fact ready to forgive him when you walked up to his place if only he put in effort to explain, you were to be honest already partially relieved when you saw him alive and well. 

But he didn't make a single sound from behind that door and before you walked back down those stairs you decided you'd act out on your pathetic thoughts and slow down with those steps. What if he was putting on some clothes before chasing you down? Or tying his shoe laces before he could walk out. You waited a little bit longer, before it turned way beyond the limits of pathetic behaviour you set. You had to leave and actually get back home. 

Act like you weren't  affected by his behavior, change of his mood and the mixed signals that were coming from him. You had to act in front of Eunsoo like Haechan didn't affect you deeply and all your thoughts were centered around him. 

You couldn't possibly stop yourself thinking if he took your words seriously or he'd figure you were angry and didn't actually mean you didn't want a single finger of his on you, because if he'd reach out first you knew you would not ignore him. 

"You're actually lucky you dipped." Eunsoo walked into your room, arms pulling off the hoodie she wore outside. "Can I sit?" the girl asked pointing at your bed. 

You nodded, scooping your books to one side of the bed. You decided that studying would be helpful for your brain to stop pacing from one thing to the other but you were proven wrong about an hour ago but still stared into those books like they were about to give in. 

"Haechan didn't show up for the rest of the day. Were you successful in finding out what the hell happened with him?"

"No." you shrugged nonchalantly. "I couldn't care less for his reasons. It's for sure the very last time we're working on something together. I mean, worked."

"It's just weird, maybe I'm overthinking." Eunsoo sighed and rested her head on her palm. 

"It is indeed weird." you were trying to understand the girl that was sitting on your bed. Was she just talking to you, did she want you to talk out all the shit you had on your mind about Haechan or she knew something and wanted to dig in further out of pure curiosity. "I'm maybe glad I didn't see him at my peak rage cause I'm sure he would've walked away injured." Eunsoo giggled with her mouth hidden behind her other palm. 

"I hope you'll completely let go of this ridiculous situation by Friday and will enjoy the party like the queen of unbotherness that you are." 

"What party?" you furrowed your eyebrows for a second before your heart dropped down to your feet. "That catamaran thing Jeno's arranging?" That Haechan is totally attending and totally is not going to reach out to you at as he promised before he would. 

"He actually sent me the pics. It's a little better than a catamaran." Eunsoo commented after a chuckle, reaching out for her phone to show you the pics. "Jeno said there's a big outside area."

"Very suitable for the season." You smirked. 

"Well, it's still pretty warm, I think a lot of padding will save us. And a big enough inside area for dancing, food and other fun things."

"Fun things like what?" 

"Games, I don't know, quiz, whatever comes into his mind. Jeno actually isn't that good with stuff like that so I'm wondering a little what all of this going to look like." she showed you a picture of a massive looking tourist boat, yacht, ship? You couldn't really work out what was the right name for that. "Okay, it's not really a catamaran like. I'll take my words back." You smiled honestly impressed. "Wait, how many people are coming? This feels like an expensive thing to rent."

"Jeno's dad is a best friend to the owner of the company that owns those boats. He's paying almost nothing, so we're lucky for a friend like Jeno." she beamed. 

"We-, sure." You couldn't hold back a laugh. You weren't sure you ever had even a simple conversation with Jeno before. 

"What?" Eunsoo chewed on her cheek probably finally realising she was smiling all the time she was tlaking about Jeno. Not sus at all, you swallowed. 

"You do realise I most likely know none of those people invited except for you and Sua and Aeri."

"You know Haechan."

"I'm definitely far from knowing him." you rolled both your eyes at her words. Even if you thought before you did, it's all gone now. 

"Well, you two were off to a good start, before... today, you know." She scratched her brow, suddenly getting off your bed. "Ugh, I'm gonna heat up some rice and fry an egg. You want some?"

"Yes please, thank you." You smiled, watching Eunsoo fade behind the door. 

Off to a good start, you thought to yourself and almost pulled the hair from your head. 

-

You had a feeling you should not go. You could name a whole damn list of reasons you should just not attend the party stay at home and watch a movie, read a book, listen to a podcast - the list literally goes on, but there were 2 reasons that were strong enough to influence you to come:

1. You would not allow Haechan to think you skipped the party because you were mad at him;

2. It turned out you were pretty weak when it came to resisting Haechan, you couldn't allow yourself to be in bed for the evening, thinking and wondering if Haechan was there, what was he wearing, what did he smell like today and if he would see you would he let the two of you fall back to complete strangers or make a move? 

That's why currently you were standing next to Eunsoo in an elevator that was taking you downstairs. A maxi dress with fitted silhouette in mesh with long sleeves, gathered waist, mock neck and all over pattern in dark dusty blue color hugged your body. You didn't really want to dress all out but the dress was giving warm and secured so you just put it on, getting approving nods from the girl next to you. 

"I am not letting you come back home without securing Jeno, like I'm being completely serious right now. I don't understand why he's acting like he's blind. If he's not going to drool over you tonight I'm going to punch some sence into him." you giggled "I'm so tired of watching you two beating around the bush." 

"We're not!" Eunsoo protested on her way out of the elevator. 

"I'm sure he wanted me there so I'd be your wingman." 

"Shut up, for real." Eunsoo rolled her eyes at you. 

You quickly got into the taxi that awaited the two of you in front of the building. Soon enough you were on the little ladder that connected pier and the boat. A man helped everyone get safely inside of the boat, you guessed it was the captain. As soon as you entered, violet neon light cut your eyes a little as the blackness of the outside contrasted with lighting much. Jeno stood right at the entrance beaming a smile at everyone that entered. 

"Welcome to the Jeno boat, we're about to take you on the best ride in your life." Jeno's eyes immediately glued to Eunsoo, not giving a single glance to you.

"I hope the best boat ride in my life will not end up the way your last party ended." You had to swallow to prevent yourself from laughing. Spotting a bar and Sua right next to it, you didn't even need to excuse yourself, you walked away unnoticed by the two, booing Sua as she reached for the drink placed in front of her by the bartender. 

"Boo!" you exclaimed, placing your palm on the girls waist.

"Damn!" She exclaimed first annoyed as her drink almost spilled, turning around to probably swear at you, before she processed it was you, her friend. Sua's eyes ran all over your outfit, her tone completely changing. "Damn girl!" She giggled, placing the drink back at the bar table, reaching out for your palm to twirl you in front of her. You twirled like she wanted you to and made a cute pose as a killing point. "What a pretty dress and what a pretty girl. Want to hook up?" Sua shouted to be louder than the music playing with her brows as she leaned into you, with a voice that she probably considered flirtatious but was just giving away it wasn't her first drink of the night. 

"What you're having?" you peeked at the drink behind the girl.

"A Pina colada. This one's actually one of the best ones on the menu. I've tried a few other cocktails."

"Off to a great start." You giggled, ordering the same drink. 

"Oh." Sua made a sound staring at the entrance and you almost asked her what was up but you heard the loudest scream and giggles after and by all those noises it was impossible for you to not acknowledge Haechan's presence. You considered turning around and checking out his appearance but you weren't still done proseccing his total black outfit from weeks ago and seeing whatever he was wearing now would probably make you weak in the knees. 

The bartender handed you your Pina colada, you taking a sip of the drink immediately. 

"It does taste good." You gasped at Sua that was finishing off her glass by now. 

"See, I told you it's good. Like, really good, I'm impressed." She giggled and took a look at the bartender "Two more, please." The girl probably caught your shocked stare "for you and me." She added. 

"Thank you. Want to take a walk outside?" You smiled, you didn't want to turn around and find Haechan somewhere behind you. You wanted to exit the same area he was in and prepare yourself to actually face him. In addition, you did come there to hang out with your friends and specifically give the boy zero attention. You were trying to keep things as they were planned. You had a little bit of an anxious break down because you had a gut feeling once you turn around you'll get caught by him and he'll tease you till your very last day on earth.  

"Yeah, sure. More people coming in. I think, everyone by now must be here." Sua stated, making you turn around quickly, seeing no one in a span of a second. Still you spotted there was indeed more people than before. "Oh, I spotted Aeri." She jumped in place excited, waving at the girl that most definitely couldn't see her yet. "Wait here and get our drinks. I'm going to bring Aeri here." You gave Sua a nod as she took off. 

The bartender placed both full glasses in front of you in a minute and as more people were gathering around the bar it was harder to stay there and keep your drinks safe. You could feel the boat start moving in a bit and  to confirm your assumption you heard a wild noise coming from Jeno. A very loud 'let's go' that was perfectly heard by you even through the music. You had to turn around because it was too much of a temptation to see what mess he was up to. Well, for now, the mess weren't really there, he scooped his closest friends around him, taking all of them at once to the bar. You had to be blind to not see Haechan under Jeno's right arm. He had to bent his back a little to fit in. As he was smiling widely, showing off his perfectly white teeth, eyes disappearing in pure joy. His hair seemed a little messy, like he didn't style it at all, got out of the shower and let them dry naturally. You had a feeling if you'd touch his hair you'd be able to tell if he blow dried them or not. Haechan wore a graphic t-shirt with a zip up black hoodie and a leather jacket. Skinny black jeans that he wore showed off his skinny built, finishing off the look with his casual white trainers. You had to force yourself to blink to not look crazy. 

The boys were chatting and as the tone of their voices got seemingly lower you couldn't even guess what they were saying. Haechan freed himself of Jeno's hold, reaching for the menu on the other side of the bar. You turned away, watching Sua and Aeri approach you. 

"Hey." Aeri reached out to hug you. "I see that freaky company is already starting their madness." she rolled her eyes. 

"If Jeno's here, where's Eunsoo?" you asked, sincerely curios. You weren't able to see Eunsoo from where you were standing. 

"She's at the entrance with a girl that took economics with her. Apparently they've got some serious business discussion." Aeri pointed with her hands where you guessed she last saw your mutual friend. 

"Okay." you gave her a nod, trying really hard to not stare to the side all the noise was coming from. The whole place was pretty chill, Jeno's friends or most likely acquaintances filled up the improvised dance floor. There was maybe 50 people, probably even more. You couldn't imagine Jeno knowing all of them. You never saw like 90% of these people before, you wondered if every friend brought a friend and a long chain of people showed up here without knowing who people surrounding them were. 

You wondered if Haechan brought anyone too to fill up the cost of the trip or what if he really did bring someone because they were his friend, because they were close and he wanted to see them here? You were jealous because you obviously weren't one of the people he wanted to see here. 

When Aeri finally got her drink from the bartender that was finally freed from Jeno's besties order, Sua, Aeri and you walked outside, greeted by the breezy wind. Thankfully, lots of blankets were piled up on one of the stools, the three of you immediately covering yourself in multiple layers of those. 

"There's even comfortable outside seating." You exclaimed, quickly moving your limbs over to the leather couch with multiple pillows. "I wonder if those pillows were ever at risk of being thrown away into the sea." you chuckled, making yourself comfortable and making room for your friends. 

"I bet these are sewed onto this." Sua dropped herself next to you, pulling onto the pillow. 

"Wow they are indeed sewed into this couch." You giggled like it was insanely funny to you. It really wasn't, just the 2nd Pina colada on an empty stomach was making your head spin a little. 

"It's making me sick a little." Aeri stared into the water that foamed from under the motor. "If you look for too long its kinda starting to make you sick."  

"Don't look." Sua laughed, pulling onto Aeris hand. 

"Fine." the girl turned to look at the two of you hidden under the blankets, fingers peeking from under them to hold onto Pina coladas. "Were you able to take a glance at all the guests? Any interesting faces?"

"I couldn't see anyone besides Jeno that greeted Eunsoo and I. More like he greeted her and then he got tunnel vision and I ran away to Sua. That's it. I know nobody here except for Jeno's circle. "

"I heard Jeno's bestie Jaemin brought his girlfriend for the first time to meet his boys." Sua cleared her throat before speaking. 

"Sweet." Aeri cooed in unison with you. 

"People are saying Jeno threw the party so his friend could confess feelings to someone."

"Who? Jaemin to that girl?" 

"I guess." Aeri shrugged. 

"Look! The moon!" Sua pointed at the sky, making you jump in your sit with the unexpected loudness. 

"It looks like a full moon." Aeri commented. 

"It's not. It's waning moon, full moon was yesterday."

"Hi Mr.Moon." you giggled, stretching out a hand from the blanket to wave at the sky. 

"Hi." Both Aeri and Sua sang. 

"Are you three talking to the moon?" Eunsoo forced the three of you turn around to the entrance door. "How many drinks each of you had?" She laughed, walking up to you. 

"Not that many." Aeri protested, more on her behalf than yours and definitely not Sua's. 

"You three should come back inside, it's warmer there and they're about to play your favorite song, Aeri."

"What?" Aeri exclaimed like she was cut deeply. "And I'm here staring at the water bubbles battling my wish to throw up?" The girl laughed and stood up immediately. "Sua?" the girl suggested. 

"I'm kinda having fun right here." Sua smiled like a Cheshire cat. 

"Come on, I thought you two would be right in the center of that dancing pit setting the whole party up." Eunsoo pulled onto Sua's hand making the girl stand up too. Sua placed her half empty glass on something plasticy that seemed like a great storing surface at first. Aeri linked her arm with Sua's, taking the girl back inside in pure silence

"I'm kinda offended." You giggled, looking at Eunsoo that took Sua's place. "Did you not expect me to pump up the party?" 

"I did!" Your friend protested weakly. "I actually wanted to tell you something."

"Does this have to do anything with Jeno?" You perked up your ears, gossip was one of the things that made you dead excited. You sipped onto the Pina colada that you tried really hard to not finish off. 

"Yeah, kinda." Eunsoo smiled shyly. "Wait, I didn't even have a single drink yet, I'll go get myself one before we talk." 

"Sure." you giggled " i'll be right here." Eunsoo nodded with a giggle. "get me one too, please." you shouted as the girl was reaching the door, making sure she did actually hear you. 

You closed your eyes for a second, focusing your hearing on the loud music blasting inside. It was really loud and tempting, you did want to come back there and have fun with your friends as soon as Eunsoo spills her secrets. It took her a little longer than you expected to return to you and by the time it felt like it was maybe 10 minutes since she left you started to doubt if she'd even return to you at all. It kinda felt nice, the more you drank the less you were worried about Haechan, so you downed the drink in your hand to take the one Sua left behind.

Finally, you heard the door open once again and the lonely steps signalled that it must be Eunsoo. You opened your eyes only when by your calculations she was about to stand right next to you, ready to reach out your hand for the drink when your smile faded completely as your vision worked out the person in front of you. 

Haechan was still smiling at you despite your face dropping completely. There wasn't a chance he couldn't read the room, not  understand that you didn't want him here or you dreaded breathing the same air as him. That's the main reason you were spending your time here, outside. 

"Can I sit?"

"No." you replied firmly, looking away. Your eyes focused on the inside of your glass as you took a sip. 

"Please?" 

"No." you stated once again, challenging him with a stare. 

"I-ugh, I'm sorry, I'm going to disobey." Haechan scrunched his nose, taking a little glance around and sitting down. 

"I'm waiting for my friends!" you protested, moving your body into the farthest corner from where Harchan seated himself. 

"Okay, I'm just going to sit here wait for your friends with you."

"I don't want your company." 

"I know." Haechan reached out his hand to you palm up. You didn't understand if he expected you to hold it or what was the intention of the gesture, but you ignored it. "You look very pretty tonight, if you don't mind me saying. I wish you didn't have to hide here because of me." your head snapped in his direction. You were so exasperated it took you a good second to start talking. 

"I'm not hiding here. Not from you or because of you, of all people." you tried really hard to sound scandalised, to not sound like you were exposed and hurt and very much curios why did he come here and where he wanted to take this. 

 "Good, because it kinda felt like it-"

"It's not." You didn't let him finish his nonsense. 

"Okay. I know you're mad at me, it's obvious. I did screw you up skipping our presentation day." Your eyes glued to Haechan's side while his attention was glued to his own fingers. "I didn't mean to, I'm sorry." Haechan moved his eyes to your face, catching you off guard. 

"Okay." you gulped before replying. 

"I'm really thankful you got me an A even though I made you all stressed out like that." Haechan lowered his voice, teasing his lower lip between his teeth. 

"Okay." you nodded quietly not being able to tell him how careless he was and all the things you were practicing because you most definitely was one step away from voicing to him your desires and smashing your lips against his, with the way his teeth were teasing that lower lip. 

"Come on, talk to me." The hand that reached out for you before now was gripping carefully onto your knee for attention "If I'm not seeing things that aren't there..." he paused probably picking out words to say, your heart went on pause too. "I probably made you hella confused, I'm so sorry. Whatever I made you think is right." you couldn't find words to talk back so Hyuck continued after a pause "See? I'm trying hard to get over my pride and say I'm sorry. Can't you do the same for me?" Haechan's fingers flexed on your knee. 

"I don't have to be sorry for anything." you pressed "If you wanted to say that I was right when I felt like you couldn't care less about me and I wasn't one bit someone worth at least noticing of your plans in advance then thank you for confirmation, I guessed that by now without your help." You tried to shake away his hand off your body. You were feeling a little too warm under his touch. 

"I didnt mean that you need to say sorry to me, only the pride part. You really don't want to make it easier for me, aren't you?" 

"I don't know what you're talking about." You moved your body more against the back rest, crossing your arms over your chest, your drink close to your mouth. The pineapple smell made you thirsty, you took a sip. If Eunsoo ever planned on coming back it's better she returned with a whole damn tray of drinks with the time it took her, you thought. 

Haechans finger still rested over your knee like they were meant to be there. It made you mad a little, that you didn't force him to put it away immediately and now the Haechan fever was spreading over your body. 

You reached out a hand, peeling each of his fingers off your knee. Haechan's fingers were freezing, if you weren't mad you would've suggested him a blanket. As soon as he gave in and allowed you to take his hand in yours you reached to take it back to his lap. You wanted to let go as soon as you reached his lap and hide behind the blanket but instead you were caught in claws formed by Hyucks fingers. He forced your palm to rest against his lower stomach, not letting you to win the battle the two of you suddenly had. 

"Let go." You tried to sound threatening. 

"Not until you're forgiving me."

"Then you'll have to freeze to death and I'll watch you drown in the ocean, Jack." you smarted.

"It's a river, Rose." he cackled, always being ready for a comeback. 

"Shut up, I know." You tried to pull your hand out of his hold as it felt like he loosened his grip, but as soon as he could feel you move his hand pressed yours back against his stomach. 

Your other hand still held onto the glass and you downed whatever was in there to free your hand. 

"I know you know." Haechan smiled warmly at you. You looked at him a little confused, was it the Pina colada or the way his fingers were gripping onto yours? "Are you done with your drink?" the boys finger pointed at the empty glass in your hand. "I'll take it, okay?" Reaching out the next moment to take the glass from you. 

You watched Haechan place the glass back to where Sua stored it before. He moved slowly, like he had all the time in the world. You wondered if anyone will eventually walk out that door to have a smoke break or if Jeno will look for Haechan to set you free. Or Sua, or Aeri, or literally anyone. You still had a little hope Eunsoo will remember she wanted to share her news with you and return. 

You were buzzing a little inside if you were honest to yourself. Haechan did find you himself, he did say he's sorry, he did hold your hand like he wanted for you two to be closer. Still, he didn't really say anything besides he was sorry. It wasn't enough for you to get your guard down, to let him play you like he wanted to. 

"You can let go of my hand, it's not like I'm going to run away from here anyway." you said calmly. You had that warm aura under the blanket, it was pitch black outside but the lights from the inside were making the dim light come through to where the two of you were sitted. Same for the music, you could still hear pretty clearly the muffled sound coming from the inside. It made you reminisce a little about that time Haechan took you out. You moved your eyes onto his face features. Haechan's face softened too as he saw you relax more. You wondered if he thought of that time too, how he rested his head on your lap and made you run your fingers through his hair. If he'd ask you to do that now, you wouldn't mind agreeing. 

"Promise?" You gave him a slight nod. "I want us to go back what we had." 

"I-" your face dropped a little as the words left his mouth, he clearly felt that as his face expression mirrored yours. He was putting effort for you to allow him the sex he talked about. "I'm not going to sleep with you." you pulled your hand out of his grip, finally. 

"I mean to what we had for the last couple of weeks. When we were partners in the project and friends." Your head snapped back in Haechan's direction. "I mean it. I want to be your friend." you blinked at him wordlessly. You felt a little too warm under all those blankets while Haechans ears were seemingly turning pink from the cold outside. You reached out to him with no sound at all, lifting up his palm the moment he realised you were reaching out to him. You ignored the gesture once again, moving up to feel the temperature of his nose and ears with the back of your hand. 

"You're freezing. You'll get sick." you half whispered, taking all those blankets off your body. As you sat straight and gathered all the blankets left behind by girls you had to get on your knees on the couch as the dress you were wearing was way too narrow on the legs and didn't allow you to move however you wanted to. "I can share a blanket with a friend." you added quitly, bitting onto your lips afterwards as you busied yourself with covering Haechan who you could tell with your side vision bit into his cheek, staring at you intently. 

"Honestly..." Haechan brought your attention to his lips, while your hands reached to his chest with a blanket "You look very pretty tonight..." You pressed your palms against Haechan's chest when you felt his palm very up your thigh, you could feel his fingers tight on your bum. Your heart hitched,  you needed immediate medical help but all you got is Haechan’s tightened grip as he felt your body lose balance and give in to him a little "Like, saying this as a friend, very pretty." he added, moving his hand up onto your waist to prove to you it was a friendly gesture indeed. Like he was just trying to help you keep your balance.

"Thank you." you gulped, reaching out to put one more blanket over the boys body, when you felt a little like giving in. It didn't really have to be all the way him, you felt like you had to give him something too. You couldn't really process your own thoughts let alone processing whatever was happening between you two. You sat back down onto your knees next to Haechan, smoothing out the blanket like a caring person over a sick someone. Haechan watched you intently, it almost felt like he could see the thought process inside you, not moving and giving you all the time you needed. You leaned in to him slowly, Haechan's hand sliding up your back the closer you got to him. Your eyes ran over his features, he was as attractive as you could remember him being that day you felt for the first time that he can be attractive. You thought back for a second and wondered if that day even was the first time you thought about him in that way. 

You moved one of the hands that supported you from Haechan's chest onto his cheek. You really wanted to caress his cheek like that since that time he rested his head on your lap. You ran the fingers up the skin and it felt even softer than what you imagined. Haechan smiled under your touch, sincerely, you could feel that because you just witnessed him being sincerely happy with his friends. You were feeling overwhelmed with the fact he was right under you, open to anything you would suggest and do. He never felt more real and sincere than now even though he wasn't saying anything at all. You could feel your ears burn with everything you felt for Lee Haechan. His hand that now rested at the back of your neck didn't give you any pressure at all. It felt like it was there just in case you were about to dissappear and he'd catch you. 

You pecked the corner of his lips quicker than he would be able to process it, quicker than you were able to process it yourself. Haechan's head moved in your direction as you were pulling away, he tried to catch your lips with his but you paced away and he let you move as far as you wanted to. 

"I want more." He whined, moving his other hand onto your waist.

"As a friend?" you mused, feeling his hand crawl from the back of your neck to grip onto your face. 

"Yeah, as a friend." he smiled even more, his palm now pulling you closer to him. You gave in kissing the other corner of Haechan's mouth. His eyes closed, letting you know he liked it. You smiled to yourself, you've seen Haechan at the peak of pleasure numerous times but somehow the face expression he made now made you the happiest. You pecked his jaw, peppering more confident kisses all the way down his neck, Haechan's fingers still holding onto your face in the process. 

"Straddle me." he groaned, as you raised your head to wet your lips.

"My dress's too tight, I can't." your pointing finger touched his neck softly where the lipstick stain was visible, Haechan's skin reacted to the touch, sending chills to the back of his neck.  

"Why'd you wear something like that..." Haechan looked you in the eyes. "Always trying to make things harder for me, even with the clothes you wear. Right, baby?" you held back a gasp the very last moment before it escaped your throat. It must've looked terrifying from Haechan's perspective, your face expression, like you were about to pass out just at the sudden pet name once again. You froze a little because it was hard for you to process the next steps. Haechan on the other hand moved under you, freeing his body of all those blankets you carefully placed on his body not that long ago. His legs spread more and you sat back on your heels to not get in his way and watched what he was up to. He pulled himself more against the backrest, trying to pull the pillow behind him to the side and making you giggle. 

"These are sewed on this."

"Shit." Haechan swallowed a laugh, suddenly grabbing onto your thighs to guide you next to him on the other side of his body. His hand guarded your neck from the uncomfortable pillow-less side of the couch, comfortably wrapping around your body. His other hand guided your legs over his thigh and covered the both of you with the blankets. You kept your body a little distanced from Haechan, at least it's upper part. It only felt comfortable to rest your head on his chest, so you did that, making the both of you closer than before. Haechan slid his hand down to hug your waist and both your hands locked round his neck. It felt a bit surreal if you were to think about it, you were volunteerely snuggling with Lee Haechan of all people, at a party. 

Haechan was finally done with piling back onto you all those blankets, creeping up a hand onto your cheek. It quite literally felt like a fever dream. Feeling Haechan's fingers on your freezing skin, while staring into your eyes so sweetly and deeply. Your heart skipped a bit when he licked his lips suddenly, making it feel like he'd lean in and kiss you now. He didn't, though, and it really felt like a teasing contest and despite both contestants very clearly dying to touch each other's lips and get lost in each other, they held back with the very last strings of sanity and didn't want to lose that competition. Haechan's fingers ran through your cheek consistently, you would've purred if he'd kiss you in reward. 

"I feel dizzy." Haechan commented, breaking the silence between you two. Dear lord, if only the boy knew how dizzy you felt from keeping yourself composed. 

"Are you sea sick? Did you have too many drinks?" you blabbered. It was a little too clear he didn't feel actually sick. 

"No I'm dizzy because of you." He voiced out what you were feeling, you were so overwhelmed with his presence and his warmth and the fact he smelled so good and so... dear to your heart, your fingers pulled his neck more against your face. Haechan moved more, getting his lips against your cheek. 

"I need you to know, I like you so much." his lips pressed against your cheek as he said it, making his nose press against you aswell. You felt like he entirely pushed you more against his body. You needed medical help, immediately. Your heart wasn't used to this sort of emotions. 

"Shut up." you shot back immediately to hide the gasp that exceeded you, instead of a thought thrugh answer. You didn't expect him to be so blatant after all the pining you've put yourself through, you would've never guessed he'd say something like that. But then again, you were constantly proven you can never know what will be Haechan's next move. 

"I'm serious." he pressed and forced your eyes to find his. 

"How much did you have to drink?" you tried to back out. It was so terribly difficult for you to jump over the metaphorical wall so suddenly, let him know verbally that everything he felt was mutual. Surprisingly you turned out to be more stubborn in that sence than Haechan himself. 

"I didn't have a single drink, which I know is not in any way relatable to you. Still, I'm not able to get your guard completely down and have your heart open for me." Your eyes ran down his neck and chest. 

"It is, open." you mumbled. "I... you can clearly tell everything is the same for me? Don't make me struggle." Your fingers played with the fabric of his shirt on the shoulder, while your brain fought back and didn't let you say you liked Haechan even more than he could've imagined. 

"Look me in the eyes, at least." He whispered and your eyes moved back to his face but were unable to focus on them. Haechan moved his head towards you at the same time and the second you caught up with his actions you felt his lips on yours. 

Something between a moan and a cry exceeded your mouth. Your hands gripped immediately onto his neck with force, even if Haechan intended on keeping the kiss sweet and slow he quickly scratched those intentions when he could feel how badly you needed him. 

He felt just like that last kiss that lingered on your lips for weeks. You loved his lips like that, warm, plump and all yours. He clearly was more than ready to speed up the pace and once it was clear the two of you were on the same page, Haechan deepend the kiss. He sucked on your lower lip, slowly turning you onto your back. He clearly forgot about your dress situation, trying to place himself between your legs. 

Haechan's hand carefully held the back of your head to not hurt you from the solid armrests of the couch. Your tongues started a battle that was impossible to win. Haechan's other hand firmly gripped onto your waist, while his leg finally was able to get between yours. You almost found it in you to worry about the dress getting ruined and stretched out but you felt Haechan's mouth leave yours and the sudden breath of fresh air made yourself even more dizzy than before. You lost all the thoughts in your brain. 

Your fingers ran through the boys hair, brushing the strands back and making a whole mess in place of his hairstyle. Haechan leaned back to peck your lips, then lowering his lips to your neck. You tightened your fingers in his locks, forcing a purr from his throat, that happend to land on your neck. Your hips moved against his thigh unconsciously, making yourself heated in a whole different way. 

"Haechan." you half moaned. His tongue played with the skin of your neck, drawing tiny lines and sucking it in with his lips. As his chin moved the fabric of the dress lower down your skin, Haechan's licks and sucks became more aggressive, in addition with little bites you could feel him suck in a hickey at the base of your neck.

Your center rubbed against his thigh unconsciously, while you were shivering under his touch, creating friction for Haechan as well.

"This is just a little reminder in case you're black out drunk and won't remember what boundaries we overstepped." he pecked the skin that must've been red and moved his face back in front of yours.

"I am not." you smiled at him and let go of his hair to hold his cheeks between your hands. They felt so soft, so velvety, and the way you squeezed them between your palms made him look like the softest person ever. 

"Then it's for me to know it wasn't just a fever dream." You smiled at him even wider, pulling his head closer and pecking his lips. Haechan kissed you back slowly, rubbing his body against yours in a very lazy manner. His mouth left yours, hiding his face against your neck, closer to your ear and nibbling on the skin there. It felt so good to have his body weight pressing you down that outside couch. You couldn't care less if someone was about to come outside, even if they did you wouldn't be able to move yourself an inch away from Haechan's body. Your only regret was that neither of you had magical powers so you'd be able to move to your bedroom this very moment and be able to have each other for the rest of the night. 

"Kiss me more." you whispered needy. Even you were dreading the clothing choice by now, you needed his touch, you needed the feeling of his skin on yours, anything that would make you a little more closer to him would do.

You were starting to get greedy, only recently you thought you'd die just from the kissing and now you needed more and more.  

Haechan raised his head and smashed his lips against yours, smirking for a slight second beforehand. 

"So needy for my kisses and just a week ago you acted like you never wanted to kiss me." he mumbled into your mouth. 

Haechan's body grinded against yours with full force now and you couldn't possibly ignore him getting hard on top of you. You definitely weren't about to have sex on the outside terrace of the boat and you hoped  he didn't think of that either. You had to find power in you to stop before it got painful for him. 

"Haechan-ah." you moved your head back only to be followed and caught with his lips once again. "Baby?" you placed your palms on his chest, pushing the boy away. You tried the pet name to get his attention and it clearly worked. Your own heart did a flip, you couldn't imagine what he felt, you definitely smashed a few layers of bricks on your metaphorical wall with a cannonball "Don't you think we need to slow down?" you asked softly, directing your eyes between your bodies. You felt like Haechan's cock twitched in his pants. 

"Right." he cleared his throat and pushed his weight off your body, extending his arms to keep the distance. He stared at you for a good second, leaning back to peck you quickly. "I do need to cool down a little." you gave him a nod and watched him get up with a smile. You sat back on the couch, Haechan making himself comfortable right next to you. His pants did look terribly uncomfortable on him now, you noticed and you were hoping the cool wind would help him calm down quickly because it wasn't like you wanted to give him a blowjob in the middle of a party. Or more like maybe you did, but not right here in a public setting and besides that you wouldn't let him know even that you had the thought, he'd get even more excited than before. 

"I'm sorry, I should've pulled you off me the moment I felt you." You moved closer and rested your chin on his shoulder. "Do you need a blanket?" you asked, Haechan's head turning in response and getting too close to you to resist to kiss him. Before he could answer you closed that centimetre between you and pecked his lips quickly. 

"No, I need the calm down, don't kiss me." he grunted in a cute way. 

"It's just a peck." you tried to hold back a smile. 

"It's your needy stare and your lips on mine and everything else and I don't think I'm going to calm down while you're here."

"So you're excited just by presence?" you teased. 

"Very much." He replied coolly. 

"I'm never eating sugar again."

"Why?" he furrowed his eyebrows confused. 

"Sugar combined with the new side of your personality will probably give me diabetes." you smiled at him expectantly, Haechan giggled, hiding his face in his palms. 

"You're so stupid." he shook his head in his hands. "You're very lucky I'm blinded by love otherwise I would've booed you."

"It was a good joke." you mumbled, trying really hard to act nonchalantly at his words. Blinded by love, was he about to say he loved you right on that couch too? You were feeling sick to your stomach. 

It got quiet between you two once again, you wondered what he thought of to calm himself down. You were just enjoying the comfortable silence right next to the boy you liked. 

You sneaked your hand in the space between his arm and his thigh, facing it upward and extending your arm further, for Haechan to properly see it in his lap and be able to interact with it. You rested your cheek against his shoulder once again. 

You were very much thankful for the cool breeze outside because your palm was currently sweating and the nerversness was crawling up your throat. You hoped the gesture was clear enough for him to act on it, but you closed your eyes in case of failure. Haechan shuffled under you and you opened your eyes to see what he was doing, and he was looking at you, bending his neck given your current position. 

Once he saw you look back at him his head turned back to look down his lap, where your hand was. You couldn't feel how you started to bite your lip in nervousness but you could very clearly feel Haechan's freezing cold palm land on yours. You opened your fingers and as he did the same, you interwind your palms. His grip was tight around your fingers and you did the same, letting him know you were serious about it. Haechan forced your hands up and to his lips, kissing the back of your palm. You wrinkled your face in relieve, even though it seemed more like you were in pain, and kissed his shoulder. 

He then proceeded to fall back against the backrest and you did the same, hands still in each other's hold. You sat hand in hand for a little while, feeling so good next to him without any excessive intimacy. You couldn't remember when or how both of you started kissing again. The kiss wasn't as passionate as before, the both of you filled that longing and now both your brains knew it ain't going to be the same as before, you won't have to hold back your feelings. You kissed steadily, Haechan's thumb slowly caressing your palm in his hold. 

"We should go back." you mumbled through the kiss. "Your friends and my friends must be looking for us."

"They clearly aren't." he giggled. You smiled and couldn't agree more. You probably spent outside at least two hours, in which there was no signs of Eunsoo, the girl that promised to get you a drink. 

"What if someone walks in on us being too explicit?" 

"No one will, besides, i don't think we're in any way explicit by now."

"How'd you know? The doors are open. You're just lying to me, right?" 

"No, Jeno keeps everyone occupied."

"You're lying?"

"I'm being serious, I'm not going to lie to you anymore."

"So you'll tell me why you skipped our presentation?" you voiced out the question you wanted to ask him for a while now. 

"I-" he sighed like he was suddenly tired "Can I not?" he asked softly. 

"No, you really hurt me. If we want to go further, I want to know why." 

"It was the trial day for that stupid case. I totally forgot about it because I was with you all the time but Jeno texted me if I'm going to be on time the next day and I was so confused." Haechan trailed off, looking into the water, like he didn't want to tell you the bad news and you blinked multiple times to not get yourself worked up. 

"What were you sentenced to?" You asked concerned but moreover scared. You were so scared it'd be something bad it'll break your heart.

"My case was closed for lack of evidence." You sighed loudly, not even trying to hide from him you were relieved. "I didn’t steal anything and I was clean because I was with you when they were doing shit..." Haechan looked you in the eyes again, squeezing your palm. "Its thanks to you I am here today with no probation period or some other shit. They made me come as a witness, but I don't really know anything and even if I did I would've never said a thing." 

"I'm so glad you're fine." you let him know. 

"I know. I should really stay next to you to stay out of trouble." you smirked and then giggled and hid your face in the crook of his neck next. Haechan stared at you teasingly and you couldn't resist running away from those eyes. 

"Okay, maybe we should come back inside." you gave him a nod against his skin. "Can we stay close to each other for the rest of the night?" 

"I have to see my friends too tho." you rose your head up to see him.

"And tell them all about me?" he smirked and you couldn't stop thinking how attractive he looked that very moment. 

"No, Sua doesn't really like you. I have to prepare her before saying anything" You came up with the mildest version you could at the spot. You didn't want to make him upset and tell him neither of them seemed to like the idea of Haechan right next to you and you weren't in the mental state yet to explain to them everything. Or explain anything to him, it felt perfectly enough for you to just have this little secret between you two. 

"But you do?" Haechan let go of your hand to enjoy your reply. 

"Shut up." you teased, forcing yourself to unglue from the boy and stend up. It's needless to say it was a difficult task to finish. 

Now that you could feel how breezy it was outside you wanted to just fall back into the warmth Haechan shared with you. You turned around checking out the boy that still sat on the couch, giving you a blank stare. 

"You're staying here?" 

"I'll follow behind." he smiled and watched you take a step away. 

"Okay." you gave him a nod and walked away further, turning away to properly walk inside. You were getting cold with how long it was taking you to walk back in. As your feet almost brought you inside you turned around with the door half opened. Watching Haechan get up and walk around the couch towards you. His eyes were set on his phone and he probably thought you were already inside, when you ran back to him, catching him off guard mid-way. 

"I need you to know too, that I like you a lot." you said in one breath, holding on to his waist. Haechan beamed a smile and you couldn't resist smiling back. His fingers quickly found your cheeks to hold you in place for a quick kiss before you finally turned around and walked back in, scanning the room for Sua, Eunsoo and Aeri. 

[benkyoutobentou]

Beginner Manga Recommendations for Japanese Learners

It's time, you've done your due diligence in studying. Now it's time to jump into native material. But where to start? Here are a few manga series that I've read that I think would be a reasonable place for a Japanese learner to start their immersion journey.

Disclaimer: I haven't read every series, and the manga that's interesting to me might not be interesting to you. We also all encounter different words as we go along our language learning journeys. A series that I find relatively easy might have you looking up every other word. The trick is to not get discouraged and just keep on pushing through! As with everything, it gets easier the more you practice.

消えた初恋 - アルコ＆ひねくれ渡: This BL series follows a group of four friends and their experiences with love in high school (it also has a drama adaptation that I highly recommend! Available to watch for free on Viki). This series is so silly and just a fun time. The art has great visual gags and it's definitely a series where you can sit down and not even realize that suddenly you've gone through an entire volume and why didn't you buy more of this series to start with? It has furigana on everything, but the characters do speak pretty casually, so there's some slang and less standard language. This series is completed with nine volumes.

佐々木と宮野 - 春園ショウ: This is another sweet BL about Miyano, a high school first year, who catches the eye of an upperclassman, Sasaki. After asking to borrow Miyano's book, the two bond over a shared enjoyment of BL manga. The vocabulary is pretty simple in this one as well, but it does use quite a bit of otaku slang, which can be difficult if you've never encountered it before. It has furigana on everything, though! This series is ongoing with nine volumes and also has a spin off series titled 平野と鍵浦 which is also ongoing with four volumes.

月刊少女野崎くん - 椿いづみ: The first manga I ever read in Japanese! This series follows a high schooler, Sakura, as she confesses to her crush and classmate, Nozaki. However, Nozaki thinks that Sakura is just a fan of his shoujo manga series, and recruits her to be his assistant. This series is so enjoyably silly with a wonderful cast of characters that absolutely steal the show. There's a bit of vocabulary specific to the process of making manga, but it isn't too overwhelming. There's also plenty of casual speech and some great moments that can't quite come out in translation (bonus fact: I actually wrote a paper on this series and how humor is translated in one of my university linguistics class). It also has furigana on everything. It's ongoing with fifteen volumes.

加瀬さんシリーズ - 高嶋ひろみ: This adorable little GL series follows two high school aged girls, popular and athletic Kase and the shy gardener Yamada, as their relationship develops over their high school years. The vocabulary in this one is relatively simple with the exception of some more specific words, but those tend to pop up time and time again. This one doesn't have furigana but I think it's a great introduction to readying manga without furigana! This series is completed with five volumes, but there's an ongoing sequel series called　山田と加瀬さん that currently has three volumes released.

ささやくように恋を唄う - 竹嶋えく: This is a music based GL series about a high school first year, Kino, who tells an upperclassman, Nagi, that she loves her music. Nagi, however, misunderstands this as Kino confessing her love for her. The story follows both the relationship between Kino and Nagi as well as the trials and tribulations of Nagi's band. This is another one without furigana, but the vocabulary tends to be simple enough that I think it's still pretty accessible. It's ongoing with eight current volumes.

かけた月とドーナッツ - 雨水汐: Our last GL, this follows two coworkers, Uno and Satou, and their blossoming relationship in a society that pushes conformity and marriage on women. I really loved the way this series depicted coming into one's sexuality as an adult. Another one without furigana, but simple vocabulary regardless. A possible difficulty with this one might be the office vocabulary, though. This series is completed with four volumes.

[fictionalcharactersaremypassion]

Bailing Out The Brother-In-Law

It's not important to the story but Ian and Mickey are in their apartment

///

Ian’s cell phone was buzzing. 

The fucker just had to leave his brightness up on high so now it lit up the whole damn room. Being a light sleeper, it woke Mickey up almost immediately, grumbling as soon as he was semi coherent and figured out what it was. 

“Ian.” There was no answer. His husband slept soundly beside him. “Fuck, man. Answer the damn phone.” 

He was out like a light, these new meds he was put on the other day really hitting him hard with the drowsiness. When the buzz stopped, the light went out. Mickey relaxed. Least he wouldn’t have to get outta the bed to check. S’probably nothing anyway. Ian was in that stupid Gallagher group chat that Mickey was also technically included in but he’d frequently take himself out of. 

But then it lit up again, this time it was a text. 

“Jesus Christ,” Mickey threw his blanket off, stalking around the side of the bed to read it. They didn’t make it a habit of using each other’s phones but they knew the passwords incase of an emergency or whatnot. 

The missed call was the first notification that popped up. Mickey’s interest rose, his eyebrows flying up to his hairline. He was very familiar with that number- it was the local jail. 

As for the text or rather texts, Tami spammed Ian’s cell with five messages. She was at home with baby Fred and didn’t want to wake him up after he’d been so difficult to put down for the night. She added that Lip got himself arrested somehow and if Ian would go bail him out using the money she sent him, she’d appreciate it. 

With his sleep-addled brain, Mickey took this all in. Now, he could have woken Ian up, made him go out there in the middle of the night to fetch his dumbass brother and go back to bed for some much needed sleep. 

A smirk grew on Mickey’s face. 

But that would have been too fucking good of an opportunity to waste. 

*

Mickey threw on a pair of jeans and a zip-up jacket. He slipped some shoes on, wrote a note for his husband should he wake up before he returned and out the door he went. 

It was different to be in the ambulance without Ian. The radio was on to give him some noise but it was nothing like his husband, who filled any and all silence with useless facts or innuendos or other goofy ass shit. 

At least the traffic was light this time of night.

As he sat at a red light, Mickey wondered what the boy-genius had done to get himself arrested. He didn’t have the guts to do the hardcore stuff, even though he’d disagree and go off to sulk like a little bitch. Mickey knew what he was talking about. Hell, he wouldn’t have believed that floppy-haired, doe eyed, all American boy scout looking kid Ian had been at fifteen woulda gone to prison and lasted. 

Because Mickey wasn’t a dumbass himself, he didn’t park the stolen ambulance in front of the police station. He was a block or so down, walking the rest of the way. 

“Ay,” he said to the front clerk when he got inside. “I’m here for Lip- Phillip Gallagher.” 

“Okay,” the chick at the desk said. She typed into a computer, pulling up a file. “He has a bail of two thousand dollars. Are you able to pay that now?”

Mickey held a comment on that, his curiosity mounting because of the amount. The fuck did Lip do? “Yeah,” he handed over Ian’s card, his hand shoved back down into his jeans pocket. 

When it was all done and processed, he was given a receipt to take back. Had to go through the metal decor too, reminded him that it was a damn good thing he’d taken his knife outta his jacket pocket yesterday so the thing could be washed. 

“He’s through these doors,” an officer came to escort him. 

“Yeah, okay,” Mickey then had an idea. “Ay, can I have a few minutes with him before you release him?” 

“Knock yourself out,” the officer didn’t object. He led Mickey through the doors, directed him to where Lip’s holding cell was and then went to sit back down. “Just tell me when you’re done.” 

“‘Kay,” Mickey saw his brother-in-law sitting down on the bench, eyes closed, head leaning back against the wall. Whatever happened, he didn’t look to ruffled, just fucking tired. “Well, well, well,” he drawled. Lip’s head whipped around to face him, and he groaned loudly. “Look like what we have here. Didn’t think I’d be seeing you on the other side, Phillip.” 

“What are you doing here?” Lip was back on his feet, standing right at the bars. “I asked for Ian to come.” 

“And you’re out of luck. He’s sleepin’.” 

“Great,” Lip grumbled. 

Mickey smirked. “How’s it like in there? Anybody made you their bitch yet?” 

Lip wasn’t amused. “I’ve been in this cell the whole time, Mickey. I haven’t seen anyone else.” Then it seemed to register to him what’d been said. “Hold the fuck up. What makes you think I’d be anyone’s bitch?” 

This was too fucking funny to Mickey. He snorted. “Like you’d be takin’ anybody down. They’d have your college ass before you could start shootin’ out useless shit like you always do.” 

“Fuck you.” 

“Think Ian would object to that,” a devilish grin grew on Mickey’s face. “He railed me for hours last night.” 

As predicted, Lip was disgusted. “I don’t want to hear about your sex life, Mickey.” 

“Ain’t like you got anything else to do,” Mickey shrugged. 

Lip’s scowl that appeared suddenly vanished, but he was still visibly annoyed. “Wait a minute. Where’s the guy that’s supposed to let me out? You paid for the bail, right?” 

Mickey was deliberately silent, arching his brow. Lip asked more aggressively, 

“Right?” 

Mickey chose not to say anything just to fuck with him. 

“Mickey, I swear to God-” 

“Take the tampon out of your ass and chill your fucking tits, man. I did the damn thing.”

Lip was still glaring at him. “Then why hasn’t anyone released me yet?” 

His question was ignored. “You gonna explain what you did to get yourself thrown in here?” 

“It’s not important,” Lip muttered, averting his gaze. 

“Whatever, man. I got all night.” 

“No, you don’t,” Lip tried to argue. “Ian-” 

“-can be on his own for a while,” Mickey finished. 

Lip was frustrated. “Fuck, why can’t you just get me out of here? I told Tami I’d be back soon.” 

“Your baby mama will understand,” Mickey said uncaringly. “Just tell me what ya did and I’ll tell the guy to get you out.” 

“You don’t even care!” Lip exclaimed. 

“I do when I get to see self-righteous ass finally get put in your place,” Mickey said smugly.  

Lip looked to be two seconds away from tearing his own hair out. 

Personally, Mickey would pay to see it. 

Resigned to the fact that he wasn’t getting out there anytime soon, at least without giving in to Mickey’s demand, he sighed. “I met a guy online-” 

“I fucking knew that ninety-six percent straight was bullshit!  Good for Tami, though. Always thought she could do better than you.” 

Lip gave Mickey a withering look. “He’s part of some neighborhood group for parents, helping them get supplies and shit.” 

“And?” 

“We started talking because Fred’s going through diapers faster than Tami and I can buy. The guy said he could get us a few boxes.Should’ve known they were stolen.” He sighed. “He told me where to go to get them, cops came and he ran so they arrested me.”

“That’s gotta be the stupidest fucking thing to get arrested for.”

“I know,” Lip said shortly. He dragged a hand down his face. “I’ve always been able to spot scams. I don’t know what happened.” 

Nobody spoke for a moment. 

“Not surprised it was you, though.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Lip said sharply. 

 Mickey shrugged. “Figured it wasn’t anything hardcore, you know?” 

“It could’ve been.” There was a touch of defensiveness to Lip’s voice. Riling up his brother-in-law was a favorite pastime of his. Ian had long learned to stop trying to get him to quit doing it. 

“Nah, man,” Mickey said dismissively. “You ain’t cut out for that shit.” 

“You don’t get to decide that!” Lip was getting angry. Fuck, this was too easy. 

“Boo fucking hoo. Go cry to your baby mama.” 

“Well, maybe I would if I wasn’t fucking stuck here!” 

“Probably got a point there,” Mickey said nonchalantly. 

Lip looked murderous. “Mickey, go get someone to let me out.” 

“Hang on a sec,” Mickey took out his phone, snapping a quick picture. He showed Lip just to be a little shit. “Ay, see. That’s group chat worthy. Not you askin’ bout shit nobody cares about.” 

“Don’t send that-” 

“Too late,” Mickey said with a grin. 

Lip clenched his jaw. 

His phone pinged. Mickey glanced at it. “Your beard wants to know if you’re coming home soon.” 

“Well, I’d like to know that too - Tami’s not my beard!” 

“Whatever,” Mickey shrugged. “I don’t give a shit. I’m gonna go take a piss. Wait here.” 

He snickered to himself after that last part. 

“I’m gonna fucking kill you for this, Mickey!” Lip shouted as he strolled away. He smiled sheepishly when a couple of officers looked his way, quickly looking as far as he could see but by that point, Mickey was no longer in sight. “Mickey, get back here! I swear to God....”

[sunshine-theseus]

Always The One | Sam Kerr x Reader

word count: 2.6k

summary: you have a huge fight but she’ll always be the one for you.

Warnings: angst, sorta some fluff?

I’m not sure if it was because I was tired from my shift, or the fact I’d waited at the restaurant for over an hour and my girlfriend hadn’t bothered to show, that had my crying in Jessie’s apartment at 9:03pm on a Thursday night.

Jessie Fleming was possibly the sweetest person to ever walk the earth, and my closest friend.

“Still nothing from her?” she asks softly from the kitchen.

I let out a slow hum, indicating Sam had seemingly not noticed her girlfriend of 3 years was missing from their shared apartment on such an important date. Then I quickly check my phone again to make sure I haven’t unknowingly shut it off or somehow just missed a text or call from the woman.

“Well, you still have a spare uniform you left here a couple months ago if you need it for your shift tomorrow. But now, we eat ice cream and watch Fantastic Mr Fox until you fall asleep.” She plops down on the couch next to me with a pitying smile gracing her face.

“Wait. Before we do that.” I grab my purse from beside my feet and pull out two small items.

“Are you kidding me?! You’re fucking joking, you’re pulling my leg. Are you serious!” She rushes out questions before snatching the items to get a closer look.

“These are really real!?”

I chuckle at her, trying to stop the tears that are forming behind my eyes.

Sam and I had begun the IVF process a few months ago after some encouragement from Katrina, Sam’s national teammate, and I’d missed my period a few days ago so I took a test. I thought it would be a nice surprise for our anniversary. That, and the small black band with a simple diamond that sat snug in a red velvet box in my bag for three months now. But obviously she didn’t show, and I wasn’t sure what to do now.

“Yeah… they’re real. I wanted to propose and show her the test tonight. But, well, you know.” I start crying again before I can stop myself, and I’ve fallen asleep not long after Jessie starts playing with my hair.

~~~~~~~~~

Work the next day did not help take my mind off the events of last night. Being a paramedic was obviously a difficult job, but I hadn’t had this amount of bad luck on a shift in a long time, and the calls just seemed to keep getting worse.

Our first call was an elderly lady whose grandson had accidentally pushed her down her front steps, she’d hit her head pretty hard, and her knee was dislocated but it wasn’t anything we couldn’t fix and get her help for at the hospital.

Later in the day we’d gotten called to a collision on the A3 motorway, 2 women and their daughter in one car and a drunk man in a large truck. One of the mums had passed away before we’d gotten there, the other fractured her clavicle and some ribs and had a broken leg. The daughter had been knocked unconscious, a broken nose and arm and a fractured C5 and C6. The man got out with barely a scratch.

That’s when I had to take a break and try to call Sam. Holding the hand of the woman and her daughter became harder when I pictured Sam and our daughter in their place.

She didn’t answer. That call or the 3 others I made before I clocked off at 6pm, uniform stained with blood.

I’d zoned out the whole drive home. I wasn’t even sure I was heading home until I’d pulled into the driveway.

I also didn’t notice the now filled space where Sam’s car sat, or the dirty Airforce 1s by the front door that were missing when I’d left yesterday morning (I’d gone straight from my shift to the restaurant), and I didn’t notice the figure slouched on the couch watching the AFL game she’d clearly missed during training today, a beer already in hand.

I went straight to the shower to wash off the blood and cry. Then I got changed into an oversized jumper and shorts, avoiding any of Sam’s jumpers I’d usually curl up in after a hard day, sat on our bed and cried some more.

I don’t get to cry for too long before the bedroom door slams open and Sam beings to yell.

“When the fuck were you going to tell me!?” I just groan in response and cover my ears with a spare pillow, but she grabs it and stands in front of me, forcing me to look at her and the pregnancy test she held tight in her hands. I’d fucking forgot to throw the other ones out.

“When were you planning on fucking telling me this round had worked hmm? That we’re going to have a baby!?” I look my girlfriend in the eyes for the first time in 2 days.

“Last night. At the restaurant. You know… for our anniversary?” and I know it’s sick, but I found joy in the way her face dropped and realisation appears behind her eyes.

“Fuck Y/N! I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry I forgot. How did I forget??”

“I don’t know how you forgot Sam. I sent you a text after you left for training. And another during my lunch break at work. And right as I was heading to the restaurant. And I called, got Jessie to remind you too, which I know she did. How the fuck did you forget Sam?” I get up from the bed and approach her.

“I don’t know, I got carried away hanging with Mills and Guro, but for fuck’s sake drop the attitude.”

Dro- drop the attitude!? She cannot be serious.

“What was that?”

“Drop the attitude Y/N. I’m sorry I forgot but the condescending tone is unnecessary, you’ve forgotten shit too.”

“Yeah! I have! Like if it’s my turn to cook dinner or if you have a physio appointment. Not a fucking anniversary Sam!”

“And this isn’t just about the anniversary anymore. I called you four times during work today and you didn’t pick up. You didn’t think calling four times during work meant I might really need to speak to you? Because when I held the hands of a little girl who had to say goodbye to one of her mum’s and the other mum who had to say goodbye to her wife all I could think of was you and you didn’t answer once. And then I see you for the first time in nearly 48 hours and the first thing you wanted to do was yell at me instead of calmly asking? It’s too much.”

I start running my hands through my hair and pacing around the room. This can’t be happening. What the fuck is happening here? Before I can think about much more, I grab my work bag and start packing a uniform and some clothes.

“Wh- what are you doing? Oh come on you’re not leaving over a silly argument.” We’d made our way to the front door by now.

“No! I’m not! I’m leaving because you can’t seem to see why I’m so fucking upset over any of this Sam. And the fact you got so ‘carried away hanging with Millie and Guro’ to forget your 3-year anniversary and just ignore all my calls. I was really excited to share the test with you, have a family, I’m not really sure what to do about that now. Oh, and here, was going to give this to you too.” I slam the small velvet box down on the counter by the door before grabbing my work boots and rushing to my car.

I hear the door slam behind me, but no footsteps follow, so I hop in and drive to Jessie’s apartment once again.

~~~~~

I’m laying between Jessie and Erin, the latter of whom Jessie had begged to come over to try and make me smile after I’d been crying non-stop, when there’s a banging on the door.

“Jessss! I know Y/n’s there please let me talk to her.” The familiar Australian accent makes me tear up again.

Erin gets up instead of Jessie and tells us she’ll handle Sam, send her away somehow.

3rd pov

Erin opens the door to a very dishevelled Sam Kerr, who’s eyes are red, hair a mess, having finally been let out of the low ponytail so she could run hands through it in a panic.

“Ez. What are you doing here? Where’s Jessie, and Y/n?”

“Sorry Sam, Y/n isn’t here. Jess ‘n’ I decided to have a sleepover so she can take me to training tomorrow because my car’s in the shop.”

“Erin come on I’m serious, she wouldn’t go anywhere else except here.”

“I’m sorry mate I haven’t heard from or seen her since our game against Man City when she had the day off.” Sam let’s out an angered sigh but accepts the idea that maybe her girlfriend had run off to one of the other girls, seeing as most of her friends were Sam’s teammates, either from Chelsea or The Matildas.

“Yeah ok, um, let me know if you hear anything yeah? I really need to talk to her.” Sam’s hand shakes as she pats Erin’s shoulder before turning away, getting back into her car to try Kyra’s or Ann-Katrin and Jess’, both friendships that seemed so unlikely to Sam, yet were some of her girlfriend’s closest friends.

1st pov

I let out a breath of relief when Erin returns to us without a certain striker trailing behind her.

“Maybe you should talk to her. She might fucking crash in the state she’s in.” the thought makes me feel bad for a moment, but she shouldn’t be allowed off that easily.

“No, she’s stupid but not that stupid. And she deserves to worry for a moment.” It was probably really mean, but I refuse to believe she doesn’t deserve a taste of her own medicine.

~~~~~

It takes me 2 more days of her calling before I start to really miss Sam, and decide to head back to our apartment just to see if she’s there, because Jessie told me how she hadn’t shown up to training on Yesterday and she wasn’t on the pitch as I watch Chelsea verse West Ham on Jessie’s tv.

As I walk through the door, the only thing I hear are the tiny meows of our cat Helen, who runs up to me to rub against my legs. I missed her.

But then I start to look around and realise what a mess the place is. Beer bottles are spread across every room and there are takeout containers that clearly hadn’t been put away since they arrived, sitting on the coffee table in the lounge room. I walk further down the hall but trip of some random pair of sneakers. No more than two steps after that, glass crunches under my boots and I frown when I see a photo of Sam with the FA Cup I had taken after their win last season. It was my favourite picture of her in her Chelsea kit.

“Sammy?! Where are you?” my voice echoes throughout the space as I creep towards the bedroom.

As I pry open the door, I’m met with a sight that both warms and squeezes my heart. Sam is covered in blankets, snoring softly. Her eyes are puffy and there are both fresh and old tear stains running down her cheeks. She looked strangely angelic, peaceful. Like the girl I’m in love with.

When I pull the blankets back, I see her hugging the teddy I got for her to take on international breaks when I couldn’t make it, doused in my perfume. I’d got it for her on our 6-month anniversary, and it didn’t take her long to buy me one for when she went away. The same one that is currently sitting on our windowsill, seeming very lonely.

She’s dressed in only a sports bra and some checkered boxers she’s been obsessed with sleeping in, but doesn’t seem to have changed in the past 2 days.

Her eyes blink open as I softly shake her away, but once she catches sight of me, she bolts up-right and scrambles to hug me.

“Hey Sammy.” I’m too tired to be angry at her anymore. I just miss her.

“I’m sorry, I’m so so so sorry I was so horrible to you. I don’t deserve to be forgiven but I’ll do anything to prove how sorry I am and how much I love you and this baby.” I then catch a glimpse of a ring, the ring, that is placed perfectly on her ring finger.

“Y- you’re wearing the ring?” and she doesn’t get a chance to reply before I’m kissing her.

“This doesn’t mean I forgive you! I’m still mad at how you treated me.” I pull back to tell her before she can reciprocate the kiss.

She doesn’t meet my eyes but nods. “I’m so sorry, I love you so much and I want to show you that and show you how sorry I am.”

“I expect you to get me every single thing I crave in the next nine months and give me cuddles whenever I ask.”

Before she can I agree I add. “And that’s only for not letting me give me whole speech about how much I love you before I propose. There’s a lot more ground to cover for the other shit.” But I smile and kiss her again.

“I would have said yes before you could talk any way. Oh! And I have a surprise for you too. I was going to give it to you on our anniversary too.”

Sam gets up and rushes to the drawers, pulling out a familiar box.

“No fucking way were you going to propose on the same day.” She simply pulls out the ring and holds it out to me.

“Will you be my wife? If you say no I might actually drop dead.” I cry before anything else. But then I catch her looking at me expectantly and I just nod before hugging her tight.

“I can’t wait to have a family with you.” I whisper in her ear.

“I bags being the fun mumma!”

“Nooo way!”

“Yuh huh! You’re going to be the safety conscious one. You literally make me renew my first aid with you every single year. I’m definitely the fun one.” I groan but hug her tight. I don’t know what I’d do without her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“SAM I’M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU ONCE THIS THING IS OUT OF ME HOW DID YOU CONVINCE ME TO DO THIS!?” I couldn’t tell you how long I’ve been in labour by now, but I’m sure Sam’s hand was about to break and everyone in the building could hear me swearing my head off.

“You’re almost there chickee, just a few more pushes I promse.”

“You said that last time and it was not just a few more pushes!”

Before either of us can say anything else I’m pushing again, and 6 minutes later, a baby’s cries fill the room, and Maeve Wren Kerr-Y/l/n joined her twin sister Charlie May Kerr/Y/l/n in their mothers arms.

When I look over at Sam, she’s smiling adoringly down at Charlie, and I see a tear run down her face.

“You’re so beautiful.” I reach to grab her hand while Maeve sleeps in my arms.

I don’t think I could love anyone, or anything more than I love Sam. In 8 months when we get married, I’ll look her in the eyes as we say ‘I do’ and I’ll know she was always going to be it for me. She’ll always be the one.

[witchofthemidlands]

after @senhorita-girassol incredibly well worded post, i felt like i could finally come out & talk about how uncomfortable i feel in this fandom at the moment.

my favourite comic book character in history is wanda maximoff | the scarlet witch because she was the first comic book character i ever saw in the first comic book i ever had as a child, she is the character that began my love for comics, but i don't really make that many posts about wanda on her own anymore because i don't want people to assume i agree with how members of her fanbase act & i have wanted to talk about this for sometime because i don't want people to assume the worst of me because wanda is my favourite marvel character.

i mean, i won't hide it, i personally hated the ending of multiverse of madness, i hate that the creators of multiverse of madness talked about how they didn't watch wandavision like it was some kind of a badge of honour that they hadn't because it seemed disrespectful to the phenomenal work jac schaeffer had done & i do hope that one day there's a way back for wanda one day because she's my favourite comic book character & i don't like that she ended her life, that felt too much to me, i found that incredibly difficult to process. i'd have personally rather she'd banished herself to somewhere with no way back but THAT DOESN'T MATTER!!! it happened, it was devastating to me, it breaks my heart just thinking about it similarly to how i felt when pietro was killed but he never came back & eventually i moved on, despite still being sad about his journey ended in live action. sometimes you can't always get what you want & that's normal, characters are killed off, that's just how it is, sometimes that's just how the story works out, sometimes the actor doesn't want to continue or the franchise wants to move on without that character, it's upsetting but that's the way it goes & yes, if it's your favourite character like wanda is mine, then it's a difficult pill to swallow, you are valid for feeling upset & valid for grieving the loss of the character you've loved so much but it's fiction, there's scenepacks, multiple comic books, there's fanfiction & currently ongoing comic books about the character, i am just grateful we had wanda for as long as we did & i can always go back & watch her content whenever i want to, to me at least now, to want anything more makes me feel like i'm being greedy.

there's also the fact that never did i think she'd have any relevance in agatha all along, other than various comments here & there, perhaps confirming without a doubt (that they have) that wanda is dead & gone & not coming back BECAUSE SHE SHOULDN'T, it's agatha's show, i mean to me, this show is a blessing because it's about agatha harkness, my second favourite comic book character ever & when i was a kid i never imagined for a second that one day my favourite comic book characters would be in live action like this, that'd i'd get all the content that i got on wanda & i especially never imagined that i'd get so much content on a supporting character like agatha or the mesmerising lilia & the gorgeous jennifer kale but we have a whole show dedicated to these characters, i am getting to see these characters i loved & grew up with be developed & explored in ways that just blow my mind, especially agatha, i mean she was the second comic book character i ever saw in my first comic, this is absolutely phenomenal.

then there's billy too & honestly i was blown away last night i mean, yeah i thought that it would have his backstory woven in with scenes of agatha, lilia, jen & rio on another trial as it's “agatha all along” & there's one thing to make a bunch of lighthearted jokes about the other characters being sidelined without being cruel. i mean wow, joe locke carried that episode beautifully, he embodied one of my favourite comic book characters in such a raw & emotional way, it is just fantastic to see him in live action like this & that he wants his twin brother tommy as the prize that waits for him at the end of the road because that's his twin brother, are you telling me that if wanda could find a way of reuniting with pietro that she wouldn't want that? tommy has often been shoved aside in the comics so to see him be the one billy wants is absolutely beautiful to me as, billy finding tommy first is what happened in the comics & to get the news that tommy, one of my other favourite side comic book characters may get explored in detail in live action is the most exciting news & more than i ever could have hoped for, what with again, the amount of times tommy has been shoved to off the side in the comics.

for me at least for me my passionate love for wanda extends to all the characters connected to her so to get any new content on the characters like agatha or billy or tommy or pietro or lorna or erik & vision makes me feel like the luckiest fan around. would i like wanda to come back, to have a project about the witches with agatha, meet lilia, jen & alice, reunite with her sons, vision & agatha so that they can have the relationship they had in the comics? yes, that would be an absolute dream to me but i wouldn't expect that to happen for YEARS & i don't really expect that to happen at all because to me at least: wanda is dead & there are no intentions to bring her back.

honestly it breaks my heart to see people be like this because it makes me question my love for the character that began my journey into comics when i was a kid & that i want to keep quiet & hide how much i love wanda because it'll make people think that i am just as bad & annoying as these “fans” who are being so cruel to others like me who are just trying to enjoy agatha harkness's, billy | wiccan's, lilia, jen, alice & potentially even tommy | speed's time to shine.

again, for me who's journey into comics began with wanda & agatha together, the character of wanda maximoff | the scarlet witch wouldn't mean quite as much without agatha harkness, without billy | wiccan & without tommy | speed. let people enjoy what the incredible, fantastic creator of wandavision & agatha all along, the person who understands so much about my favourite comic book characters & has adapted them wonderfully, jac schaeffer, is creating without being hateful because you're disappointed that it's not given you what you thought it would despite the fact it's been said time & time again by the creators & actors that it wouldn't.

i hope one day i can find part of the fanbase that wants to interact with me about a mutual love for wanda & loves my favourite comic book character as much as i do without dragging down my other favourite comic book characters because it really makes the fandom feel incredibly unwelcome & that i shouldn't have the love that i do for my favourite character & honestly that's not what fandoms should be about.

[its-jun0]

Psychological analysis of Aira

And how the loss of her mother affected the development of her personality

I feel that this is something very overlooked in the community and in honor of the new chapter I would like to do a small analysis from my perspective on it.

Although it is something very little addressed in the story, it is extremely important in her development as a character.

This thread contains spoilers for the manga from the acro silky to the Space Globalist arc!

As we saw in the Acro Silky arc, Aira's mother died when she was very little and judging by her appearance she was no more than 5 or 6 years old at the time.

This simple fact makes the event even more relevant, childhood is a stage of utmost importance in human beings, since at this stage most cognitive skills are developed.

These skills help in the development of healthy and correct management of emotions during adolescence and Adulthood also influences how the child relates to people and their environment.

The importance of the presence of parents at this stage is indispensable, since the first bond that appears in the life of a human is with them and depending on the circumstances and how this bond develops, it will affect the poor way in the psychosocial growth of the infant.

The absence of one or both parents strongly affects the development of the infant, causing damage to the child's psyche that can last beyond adulthood and is even more serious when it is something irreversible such as the death of one of them.

With this begins a grieving process, which is very different from that of an adult given the poor emotional management capacity of a child, this directly affects the growth and development of the child's personality.

Her need for perfection

One of the main characteristics in Aira's personality is the need to be perfect, both in how she acts and how she looks physically.

At first it can be seen as the need to fit in that many teenagers have, but after the acro silky arc you can see the topic in more depth.

In chapter 17 we can see how in the flashback shared with Acro Silky, Aira as a child promises her father to be a great girl so that her mother can be proud when she “comes back”.

With this in mind by connecting their attitudes she can be given a little background, since she acts so “perfectly” because in a certain part she fills the void and the need to make her mother proud.

Because in her mind the fact that everyone loves and admires her makes her someone important, no matter if that means not being true to who she really is.

And this brings us to the point that she thought she was “the chosen one”, since this was a greater merit than just being loved and popular among the people around her.

Although she acted proud about it, this was the perfect situation for her to be able to fulfill the promise she had made, to become someone her mother can be truly proud of.

Although as the chapters go by she continues with this idea in mind, her perspective changes to a more serious one, demonstrating her great development during the plot.

Her actions in the acro silky arc and how this marked a before and after in her character

As I have said many times, despite being her debut arc, this one is very important since you can notice a change, even if it is slight, in how she was presented and how she developed after this.

One of Aira's characteristics is her great empathy towards people who have gone through difficult times; this may mainly be because her own situation helps her put herself in the shoes of others.

The main example of this was with Acro silky, since both shared the pain of a loss and in this case, both were very important figures as mother and daughter.

In other situations where this can be seen is when she finds out about Vamola's past, being moved to tears and another very important point is how she behaves with Chiquitita.

Her relationship with Chiquitita

Aira and Chiquitita's relationship is similar to that of an older sister and a younger brother, Chiquitita is in the same situation as her, he is small, his mother died and he is cared for only by his father, so she can feel more than identified In this case.

Aira is giving him the support and company that she surely lacked as a child given the circumstances in which she grew up.

It is not easy for a father to address all the needs of a child in the absence of, in this case, a maternal figure, since he has to dedicate himself to working and meeting the child's physical needs, even if this means leaving emotional needs aside.

This led us to another very important point in her personality, her great resilience.

The resilience and strength that she possesses

One of the characteristics of children who went through situations where they lost one or both of their parents is the development of “strength” as a defense mechanism.

This is both an advantage and a disadvantage, since although this will be a way to overcome Life's adversities but also open the door to over-demanding and closing ourselves off to the help of others.

Aira is a very strong and resilient person, both mentally and physically, this can be witnessed in fighting and in her ability to lead others, being able to make plans without getting carried away by her emotions like in the Space Globalist arc.

But as I said before, this is also a disadvantage since many times she over-demand herself and refuses to receive help from others and to do things on her own.

Characters like Jiji let her see this in a certain part, when she said that she could defeat the aliens on her own if they would just let her and Jiji told her that she couldn't do it alone.

Being used to and growing up with the idea that she has to be strong instilled by her father when she was little, makes Aira see this as the only thing she has known during her life, If she is not strong, she will not fulfill her promise.

With this in mind we can move on to the next point, her leadership and how she relates to others.

Her role as a leader and how she relates to others

How I addressed before Aira's strength and resilience helped her achieve a good role as a leader, despite being heavy-handed on many occasions, she cares deeply about her team members, constantly asking them to be careful, also trying to put her own needs aside to protect them.

You can see this in the Space Globalist arc, when she asks Momo to take care of herself, when she is happy to see that Mr. Shrimp is alive, when Mr. Shrimp wants to help her and she asks him to go see Jiji first.

This highlights the point of self-demand that she has and how she does not accept the help of others so easily despite being a team, since, again as I mentioned before, being strong and independent is what she has been from an early age.

This brings us to the last point, her relationship with others.

Aira was surrounded by superficial people for most of her life, who were only interested in the “perfect” facade that she had created, so this whole topic of genuine relationships, both friendship and love, is very new to her.

A great example of this is her infatuation with Okarun and the scene where he congratulates her for her great performance in battle, since it is something in which she genuinely makes an effort and she is not used to being given credit in that type of situation.

So when it comes to answering she wonders why. she wasn't being her “usual self,” even though at that moment she was being more genuine with herself.

Conclusion

Aira is an extremely interesting character, who has had one of the best developments in the play, although I failed to address many topics such as her ability to admit her mistakes.

I thought that they did not really come with the main idea of the analysis and I would like to address them more forward when she has more appearances.

I genuinely hope that Tatsu continues cooking with her and can become one of the best characters in the play.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post!!

I hope you found it interesting and do not hesitate to share your point of view with me. I will be very happy to read them!!!

[kittyball23]

Snapped (a Trolls fanfic)

Summary: Engaged in an argument with his brothers, Branch allows 20-years of pent up anger to release

A/N: Based on an idea that I really liked by @pixarchan and taking place right before the oneshot "By Your Side" :)

_______________________________

“You LEFT me. I was ALONE. How can I call you my brothers?”

Branch’s voice was hard and unforgiving as he spoke, his blue eyes cold. He glared at John Dory, Spruce, and Clay, the guys who were supposed to be, as Poppy described it, "friends who could never leave you." “Why would ANYONE do something awful like that to their ‘family’?” he demanded to know.

“How could you have been alone, Branch?” John Dory asked, frowning in confusion. “Grandma was with you!”

“Grandma DIED!”

This made JD go stiff. “Wh…what?”

“Branch,” Spruce piped up uncertainly, “when did - “

“When did it happen? Pfft. A couple of years after you left. She waited EVERY DAY hoping you guys would come back, and she suffered a miserable death at the hands of a bloodthirsty Bergen with that hope NEVER fulfilled. And I had NOBODY after that…" Branch felt pain crawl into him remembering those nights that he could hear his Grandma cry, missing her other grandsons, dying still wondering what had become of them. Did his brothers even think about her? Or about what would’ve become of him for that matter, if something bad was to happen… as it had?

At that moment, the three brothers were speechless, horrified to hear what had happened to their youngest of the bunch. JD looked confused, as though he couldn’t comprehend that there was anything bad that possibly could’ve happened to him after the band had broken up and gone their separate ways. Spruce looked down at the ground in shame, feeling his heart clench for his late grandparent. Clay rubbed his arm, his ears drooping slightly in the sadness of it all.

“Branch, I - I mean…” Clay had begun to stutter.

“We didn’t know!” JD blurted.

“Yeah, I can see that. That’s pretty obvious,” Branch spat. “In fact, you guys don’t know a LOT of things. Like what it does to your baby brother when you go off and do something like ABANDON him!”

“But we didn’t mean - “ Spruce tried to defend, but had been cut off.

“Oh, what, you didn’t mean it? Yeah right. All you did was think about nobody but yourselves…”

Spruce grimaced, knowing that Branch was right. As a teen, he wasn’t thinking about the long-run of things. Clay wasn’t either. And neither was John Dory. All they’d seen was the present, what had been happening to them right there and then on the night they broke up. They’d focused on the failure, breaking the code that they’d kept among themselves in the process by putting ‘shows before bros’ instead of the other way around. And it in turn had caused them lots of hurt and regret.

“Branch! Where are you going?” John Dory called out, noticing that Branch had turned from them and was walking away.

“Far, far away… from YOU!” he called back.

JD suddenly felt frustrated. He frowned and spoke out at Branch again. “Y’know, I’m here trying to get this to work out, and here you are making things more difficult. I know what we did wasn’t cool, what else do you want me to do or say? Huh? Look, I’m sorry for what we did and for whatever else got your diaper in a knot, all right!” He huffed and crossed his arms, not understanding why Branch couldn’t just get over something that happened a long time ago… and also not noticing the way his younger brother had tensed - fists clenching, a slight tremble running through him - as he slowly turned around to face JD, an eye slightly twitching.

“It’s not enough,” Branch hissed. In it was an undertone of warning that clearly rang out Now leave me alone! Spruce and Clay got it, and they exchanged a nervous glance with one another, wishing their oldest brother would stop playing with fire. Though John Dory, clueless to social cues, did not heed the warning.

“Now you’re really acting like a baby! JD snapped, unable to believe how uncooperative his brother was being. "And not to mention crazy," he added as a mutter under his breath. The way he saw it, he'd already apologized and Branch still didn't forgive them? If that wasn't crazy, he didn't know what was!

But it seemed that he would quickly be informed.

“You wanna see CRAZY?!”

JD had hardly processed Branch’s words, when the Troll had already charged at him, a fist colliding with a resounding crack! against his jaw.

He reeled back in shock, losing his balance and falling backwards with an "OW!"

"How's THAT for crazy?" Branch screamed at him, jumping on top of him and finally allowing the two-decades worth of pent-up anger release.

“It’s crazy that you think I’d actually be happy to see you again! It’s crazy that we’re on this dangerous trip! It’s crazy that you think ONE apology is going to fix everything! It’s crazy that you guys left thinking that I’d be okay! It’s crazy that you NEVER CAME BACK!!”

Branch tussled with his oldest brother, the two of them rolling around on the ground in a messy heap, each trying to overpower the other, fists and kicks flying from every direction, with Branch intent on landing another blow, while JD fought back in defense, trying to break free from his little brother's surprisingly strong hold. Clearly, it wasn’t easy, and Branch managed to gain the upper hand.

"Stop it, Branch! You're hurting me!" JD  protested, desperately flailing his hands and trying to pry Branch of. But Branch wouldn't budge.

"Then maybe you should've thought about how you hurt ME!" He grabbed JD by the shoulders, lifting him up and slamming him down. He'd just managed to slink his hands around his neck and was prepared to strangle him, when Branch felt a tight grip on the back of his vest yank him back roughly.

"Bro, that's ENOUGH! Calm down!" Spruce clutched Branch tightly, stepping back and holding him in place from attacking anymore, while Clay hurried over to JD and began to help him get off the ground.

But Branch wasn't done. Shooting his hair out, he whipped it around JD’s neck and choked him. A loud sound came from between JD’s lips as he tried and failed to get air into his throat, before gasping and coughing hard, sputtering ineffectively in a panic. The fury on Branch's face only served to make that panic even worse.

"I said that's ENOUGH!" Spruce shouted out again, using all his strength to tear Branch away again. The blue Troll struggled fiercely, not satisfied with his restraint and making animalistic noises. His fists were still flying out, trying to land a hit. When he realized he wasn't going to, he stopped, but continued to glare murderously at JD who stood by Clay's side in utter surprise for what had happened.

Spruce waited another minute after Branch had stopped struggling to let go of him. As soon as he did, Branch turned and stormed off without another word.

"Branch..."

The whisper of his name had come from Poppy. She’d stayed clear of the fight but had witnessed it all unfold, horrified to see how things had turned out. Branch needed her support now more than ever. She hurried off after him, while Spruce and Clay tended to JD.

“Ugghhh, I think he broke it,” JD moaned, grabbing at the side of his face where Branch’s fist had collided.

Clay sighed, letting JD lean against him as they began to walk over to the caterbus. “Come on, bro. Let’s get you fixed up.”

______________________________

A/N: My working title for this was "Branch vs JD mortal combat" asdoasjgmaiodfugnsdih

[astranite]

Holding Onto Icicles

John, Gordon and hypothermia. Whump, a bit of hurt/comfort and brothers. (John too is a protective big brother. The fish is rather frozen. They both need hugs. More poetic than this intro makes it sound.) 670 words.

Written from the @Augusnippets prompt day 9: hypothermia/overheating/dehydration (a little early but as the muse goes!). Also written because it's winter and IM COLD TOO. And needed a short thing to write because I feel better when i write and that no my creativity hasn't all been eaten up im just cold, tired and stressing!

---

The ocean wasn’t nearly as cold as space— 

John leant over Gordon, checking once again on him, laying his fingertips, even gloved he knew, against his brother’s cool, pale cheek

—but it didn’t have to be. 

John hunched himself up further, to shelter Gordon from the wind with his own body. It bit into him, worming its way in through the neck of his space suit as if it could blow straight through every thermo-controlled layer like a thin cotton t-shirt. His helmet wasn’t recoverable, neither was Gordon’s. They hadn’t been prepared, not properly. Gordon was a limp weight in his lap, head flopped over to rest against John’s chest, over his heart.

Gordon had gone in the water, but he hadn’t. John was shivering too, but Gordon wasn’t.

Thunderbird Two would be here soon, she had to be. No matter how off course the storm and rescue had sent her. He and Gordon needed rescue too. 

They needed their brothers.

“Hang in there, Gordy,” John whispered.

Gordon blinked up at him. “‘S nice to see you…” he slurred.

A clumsy hand wobbled and reached to bump at John’s chin, patting it affectionately. “Wanna hang out with you m-more.”

Gordon hit John’s rather numb nose in the process. John couldn’t care less at this point. It meant his brother was still responsive. 

“We will. I promise. You’ve got first dibs on me, for whatever you want to do.”

When John had dragged Gordon out of the water from the edge, it hadn’t been a guarantee. 

“Yuh...mean it?”

If he was more with it, Gordon would’ve made a joke about being a beached seal or something because he’d been too exhausted to haul himself out of the water. There probably would’ve been sound effects.

His brother’s lips were blue.

Gordon had been silent, curling closer to John with hands that fumbled their grip on his baldric. Orange and yellow, together they were sunset colours.

It was John’s turn to blink but much more quickly than Gordon had. “Of course I do, nothing could possibly stop me.”

Not even the aftermath of water churning with icy slush and a bitter wind. He’d do anything to ensure his brother’s safety in this moment: beg, pray, make a deal with the devil to sell his soul, kill if anyone tried to take away his brother. The universe shouldn’t even bother to make the attempt.

Gordon’s fringe was beginning to freeze. Ever so gently, John swept Gordon’s damp, salty hair away from his forehead. His fingers were cold and difficult to move; he did it though.

A sliver of ice, a sword-tipped icicle, was driving itself though the back of John’s neck, into his spine. Not literally, not quite. The intensity of the cold ached sharply, seeping through his entire body, radiating inwards and outwards. It seared deep into his chest. Maybe it was a bit like what Gordon felt with his back. He’d tried to describe it once. John hoped it wasn’t too painful for him right now. John’s head pounded.

Gordon was still breathing. John held onto that as the facts and flow of his own thoughts grew slippery, as if he was attempting to hold onto icicles on a warm summer’s day. The ice gnawed at them.

His aching hand was splayed out on Gordon’s chest. Everything hurt. The colours and textures of their respective uniforms contrasted with each other, but both were blue in the end. His hand rose and fell. He and Gordon both were blue. 

The ocean, space, they weren’t so different really. Neither were him and Gordon. 

“Of course I mean it, I love you.”

Even if John didn’t know whether Gordon heard, he still had to say it. It should never have been a question.

John closed his eyes as the weight of the cold settled heavy on his shoulders, blanketing over him, more smothering than gravity. It all grew further away—

A Thunderbird’s great engines sounded in the distance.

—but he clung to Gordon tightly.

[mybiasisexo]

Entangled - Part 10

Pairing: Chanyeol x f.Reader Chapter Warnings: Language Word Count: 3.5k Author Notes: hi 🙂 . okay so has it been almost a year since my last update??? perhaps.... Have I lost a chunk of readers cause they dont even go on this site anymore??? maybe. but aye, better late than never amirite? *looks around* anyways this is the last day in jejuuuu 😫. tbh i think the main reason for the delay is that im a lil bitch and i dont want this story to end lol. but we have to end it eventually *sigh*. anyways this is not the last chapter ok? and the next chap will be up way sooner than yall think, Enjoy the aftermath of the beach and lmk how we're feeling. In other words, did yall cry like i did while I wrote this??? lol maybe just me cause im a SAP 😭

Waking up the next morning is difficult. Your stomach feels funny, and your head throbs as you roll over with a groan, bumping into something in the process.

Your eyes spring open to see Seulgi’s angelic face buried into the comforter, and you exhale. She wakes under your scrutiny, blinking the sleep away as she smiles at you.

“Good morning, Starshine,” she greets with a yawn. “How are you feeling?”

You grunt.

“Yeah, I’m about the same.”

“What happened last night?” You ask, not remembering much after returning to your friends.

Seulgi sighs. Wrapping an arm around your waist, she cuddles your side, resting her head in the crook of your neck.

“You came back without him,” she replies softly. You’re mystified by how she knows exactly where your memory faded. “You ran right up to me and started bawling.”

You wince, embarrassed at breaking down in front of everyone.

“I was going to bring you back, but you insisted on staying. So, we all hung out for a couple more hours, and the boys made sure to feed you all the alcohol present.”

You rub your head. “I can feel that.”

She chuckles. “Baekhyun did end up leaving early to track down Chanyeol, but I’m not sure how that ended up.”

It’s quiet for a moment as you absorb the knowledge of the night.

Until Seulgi finally gives in to ask, “what happened, girl?”

“I didn’t tell you?”

“You tried.” She shrugged. “But, you were crying so hard I couldn’t really understand anything.”

You curl more into her. “I fucked up.”

“How?”

“I got so caught up in Chanyeol and the wedding, that I forgot how badly he hurt me… But then I remembered.”

She remains silent, but you can sense the curiosity radiating off of her. It dawns on you that Seulgi doesn’t have any real clue to the turmoil you endured at the hands of the man you love.

“And now we’re kind of in a stalemate.”

She hums thoughtfully. “So, you’re not going to give him a second chance?”

“I don’t know if that’s possible anymore,” you reveal. “I haven’t forgiven him for what he did, and because of that, I’ve been leading him on to the point I don’t even know if he wants to get back together.”

“Oh, Honey.” She drags you tighter into her embrace. “I’m so sorry.”

You wrap your arms around her, holding her as though she’s your lifeline and fight the urge to cry. The severity of the night before settles in, and you swear you can feel the cracks forming in your heart. All you can think about is the fact you really ended things with Chanyeol on a boardwalk. The image of his defeated face haunts your mind.

Inquisitive knocking at your room door draws your attention, and Seulgi is the one to reluctantly detach from you to go answer it. While she’s gone, the tears you’d been holding back sneak out of your ducts. You quickly wipe them away before her return. 

She’s reentering the room not long after she left with Sehun in tow.

He takes on look at you and pouts sympathetically. “Aigoo, you poor thing.”

“Shut up,” you whine, hearing the tears in your throat. Your best friends topple over you, holding you from different sides. 

Sehun kisses your cheek. “I was checking to see if you guys were up. Van gets here in an hour.”

You sigh. You don’t know if you have it in you to leave these four walls, but it’s your last day on the island. The last day you’ll be able to spend time with your friends like this for a while, and you don’t want to miss it.

“How’s my baby doing?” Sehun asks, brushing away some tears that fell without your knowledge. 

“My head and heart hurt.”

“You don’t have to come today. Everyone will understand.” 

“No,” you adamantly refuse. “It’s our last day. I’m spending it with you all.”

He grins and kisses your cheek again. “Good. I don’t want you cooped up in here hating yourself all day.”

“Yeah,” Seulgi adds. “And we’d probably all be too worried about you to enjoy the festivities.”

“We’ll start getting ready,” you tell Sehun, patting his arm.

“Bet. One hour.”

An hour later, you find yourself standing outside the hotel with the others, waiting for Baekhyun and Chanyeol.

“It’s not going to wait for us,” Sehun mutters, checking his phone.

You rest your head on Seulgi’s shoulder, still nursing a hangover.

“We’re here! Sorry for the delay!” You make out Baekhyun’s voice. Cracking open an eye, you see the two last members of your party run over.

“Perfect timing!” Sehun says with a clap of his hands. “Let’s go!”

You can’t stop yourself from checking on Chanyeol. Sleep still clings to his features, the faintest of shadows under his eyes, and his hair appears flatter. A bout of guilt hits you, knowing you’re the reason for his visible exhaustion. 

Suddenly, he’s returning your stare. He either felt it, or is just as pulled to you as ever. Either way, he’s looking back at you, gaze shifting between your eyes before he bows his head in greeting. It’s hesitant, almost shy. You can’t take him playing nice after the fight you had last night, so you return his bow stiffly and rush towards the van. You crawl into the back seats, squishing between Sehun and Seulgi. Once the car takes off, you’re the one to ask Sehun what’s on the agenda for the day.

“Today is all about healing,” he explains. “We’ll be going to an aquarium and then something a bit more exciting before having dinner.”

“More exciting, you say?” Baekhyun says. “Like the sex museum?”

You all protest in disgust.

“We will not be making a stop there,” Sehun assures, quieting your complaints.

“You’re all no fun,” Baekhyun sulks. Jongdae rubs his back sympathetically.

You are going to the other side of the island, so you settle in for a long drive. You enjoy the beautiful scenery of the shore before dozing off for most of the ride.

You’re not sure how long you’re out for, but when you’re shaken awake, you’re at the destination.

Climbing out of the van, you take in your surroundings. There’s a volcano in the distance, with a sparkling blue sea in the background.

“When are we going to eat?” Jongin asks rather impatiently. Your stomach growls in agreement.

“RIght now,” Sehun says, leading you all to a cute cafe.

Your party has to split between two tables since there isn’t one big enough for the group. You end up sitting with Seulgi, Sehun, and Jongin. It’s not intentional, at least you don’t think it is, but you’re hyper aware that Chanyeol and you are sitting at separate tables.

Food is ordered, and conversation flows naturally as you all eat, eager to get to the main event. Once everyone is full, you make your way over to the aquarium. Aquaplanet is one of the largest aquariums this side of the world, and you’re going to be spending the bulk of the day there. You adore aquariums and think sea animals are pretty neat, so you’re pumped. You latch onto Sehun’s arm as you enter.

“This was a good idea,” you tell him as you’re greeted by tanks and dim lighting.

“I thought you might enjoy it. Let’s see some sharks!”

“Oh, hell yeah!”

In the beginning, the group sticks together. Everyone points out cool looking fish and exotic plants, daring one another to stick their hands in open tanks. But, slowly you all break off into groups and begin to separate. It’s not long before you find yourself alone, wandering the halls aimlessly as you observe the undersea wildlife in wonder. You don’t mind the solitude. If anything, it’s relieving, a small break from pretenses. You’re at peace, finding the aquatic life calming the turbulent thoughts raging within your mind. 

You enter an alcove of sorts and find Baekhyun there. His face is practically pressed to the glass as he blows kisses to a beluga whale that appears to have taken an interest in him. You swear you see the whale kiss him back and gasp. He hears you and jumps, jerking away from the glass in embarrassment. 

“Don’t let me interrupt,” you say with a sly grin. It falls when you spot Chanyeol on the opposite side of the small room. You forget all about Baekhyun and his whale partner as you focus solely on Chanyeol. Like clockwork, your body reacts to his presence. You swallow back the want flooding your mouth, especially when you recall the harshness of his tone from the night before. The flashbacks of his pain, his anger, his doubt keeps your feet planted where you stand. You want to hit him for all the sorrow you’ve felt because of him. You want to kiss all of your shared pain away. You want to scream all of your frustrations in his face. You want to hold and forgive him. You want to make love to him. You want to never see him again.

You catch the way his shoulders stiffen at the sound of your voice, and it’s the slap you need to remember yourself. He doesn’t want to speak to you, and you don’t blame him at all. It hurts all the same. The slight rejection is a much needed reality check, and you find the strength to move on–entering a hallway that’s dark and filled with jellyfish.

Now, being alone isn’t as peaceful as it was a moment ago. Your eyes burn as you stare unseeingly at the creatures floating around aimlessly, jealous of their complete lack of emotions. RIght now being a jellyfish doesn’t seem so bad. You’d take it over the agony of seeing your ex, the man you’re starting to think you’ll never be able to get over, even after what he did to you. It’s conflicting with a part of you that takes responsibility for Chanyeol’s betrayal. You’ve demolished his heart and yet he still claimed to want you. If he can forgive you for all your past transgressions, then you should find it in yourself to forgive him for the only one he’s ever committed against you. Bringing Yerim may have been painful, but you don’t hold it against him. You understand what he was doing.

“What are you doing here alone?” A gentle voice asks.

For the umpteenth time today, you surreptitiously wipe at your eyes before turning your head to Jongin. You give him a watery grin and he takes a step towards you, always the comforter. He hesitates though, glancing behind him where you know Chanyeol stands.

You cough a laugh and he giggles conspiringly before sauntering over to you, pulling you into his healing arms.

“It’s okay,” he whispers. “He apologized.”

“That’s good,” you say. “Last thing I want is for any of you to get caught in our mess.”

“We kind of already have been,” he points out.

“And that’s not right. I’m sorry for putting you in this situation.”

He hushes you. “Don’t be. You’re not in charge of his actions. I understand why he did it. It’s in the past now.”

You lean more into him and sigh. “You should sell your hugs. I’m starting to think they can cure depression.”

He chuckles at that and rubs your back. You both watch the jellyfish pulsate around their tank.

“I want to be a jellyfish,” you voice.

“Why?” he hums.

“Because they have no brain.”

You feel him shake his head. “You’re so dramatic.”

More uplifted, you lead Jongin into the next room.

The rest of your friends are there. It’s a huge room with massive tanks filled with sharks. You spot Sehun and rush over to him.

“Sharks!” You cheer. Sharing your joy, Sehun breaks out into a weird dance where he slices the air with his arms. You waste no time replicating his silly choreography. 

You all spend a lengthy amount of time with the sharks before wandering the rest of the aquarium, reaching the end a few hours later.

You squint against the brightness of the sun when you exit. After buying souvenirs and snacks, you all file back into the van and head to your next destination that’s about forty minutes away.

You’re dropped off in what seems like the middle of nowhere.

“Um….” Jongdae laughs awkwardly. “Are you going to kill us?”

Sehun rolls his eyes. “Follow me.”

There’s a path that he takes you down and you spot a sign that reveals your next adventure.

“Ziplining?” Chanyeol asks, excitement bubbles into his voice at the idea.

Sehun smiles broadly. “We have to do something other than lounge around and get drunk.”

Nerves rack your frame as you get suit up. You aren’t the biggest fan of heights, although the excitement from everyone else rubs off on you. While waiting in the long line, you take pictures and tease each other over how ridiculous the helmets you’re required to wear look. 

When your group makes it up the long flight of stairs to the first line, you watch as Sehun, Chanyeol, Jongdae, and Seulgi head out before you. Once it’s your turn, you take a deep calming breath as the instructor attaches you to the line, going over the rules that you mindlessly nod along too. Unfortunately, it’s in one ear and out the other because you’re too focused on the ground forty feet below.

And you’re off. A scream rips out of your throat. You’re too preoccupied by the fear to really enjoy what’s going on. Tightly, you hold onto the belt connecting you to the line, the only thing keeping you from falling, and you have little faith in the thing. Towards the end though, you work the courage to peel your eyes open and take in your surroundings. It’s not really that bad. 

You hit the end and the instructor on this tower unzips you before motioning you to go up another flight of steps. There isn’t anybody else there, but when you make it to the top, you see Seulgi taking off. She locks eyes with you and waves as she soars, screaming all the while, but they’re filled with joy. You can’t help but smile affectionately, wishing you captured the moment for her.

Then it’s your turn yet again. This time around, you’re a lot less scared, so you're able to appreciate the scenery from such a high view. Catch the beauty of the early stages of the sun setting over a small lake beneath you. You thank Sehun for coming up with this, it’s nice.

Too quickly it’s over. Your cheeks are flushed from the cold wind and the adrenaline racing in your veins.

“That was awesome!” You say as a greeting to your friends huddled off to the side.

“It was too short.” Jongdae frowns. “We should go again!”

“One more time! One more time!” Him and Chanyeol start chanting. You shake your head, struggling to get out of the harness. Seulgi helps you.

“Adrenaline junkies,” Sehun mutters.

It’s another five minutes until everyone finishes the zipline and then you’re off to have dinner.

The first thing you notice is how expensive the place appears. It’s on the sea, and the setting sun against the water is stunning.

“We are not dressed for this place,” Seulgi points out as Sehun brings you all in. He says something to the host who vanishes for a moment before coming back with an older gentleman that greets Sehun fondly. Intrigued, you watch them chat and begin to think it’s the owner of the establishment. Must be those restaurant owning perks. Sehun turns to you all and lifts his eyebrows teasingly before gesturing for you to follow. 

He brings you to a private room in the back of the building, all the walls are made up of windows, giving you a lovely view of the water. It’s so close, it feels like you’re floating on top of it. The room is dimly lit and very intimate. You all get seated, and you end up between Sehun and Baekhyun.

“We won't be ordering,” Sehun says with a cocky grin. “We’ll be getting the best this place has to offer.”

The table ‘ohs’. Jongdae, who’s on Sehun’s other side, rubs up against him.

It takes a while for the food to arrive. As you all wait, you watch the sunset and drink expensive rice wine.

“I’d like to make a toast,” Jongdae says. Straightening his shoulders, he lifts up his glass and you all follow suit. “First, I want to congratulate Junmyeon on taking the plunge. It was a beautiful wedding, and it was an honor to be a part of it. Thanks to him, we were finally able to be together again. I can’t even remember the last time all of us were able to hang out like this.”

His smile takes on a sentimental tilt. “This trip has put into perspective just how quickly time passes, and how much things change. If I’ve learned anything the past couple days, it’s that I don’t ever want us to drift apart. No matter the distance,” at that he looks at Sehun. “No matter how hectic the schedule,” he turns to Jongin. “Let’s always make a point to come together.”

“We definitely need to do this more often,” Jongin agrees. “I love you guys and this trip has been so fun–”

“Minus the whole Yerim thing,” Seulgi chimes in. Both you and Baekhyun wince at the reminder of the stressful aspect of the past few days.

Jongin continues as if he hadn’t heard her. “I’m not ready to leave.”

“I don’t want to leave either,” Jongdae continues. “There’s not much I cherish more than our friendship. Let’s make this a tradition. It doesn’t have to be Jeju, but let’s start taking annual trips together.”

You all agree with the clinking of your glasses. “To more memories!”

You swallow the tangy wine and capture Chanyeol’s gaze over the rim. He sits directly across from you, and it’s the first time he truly acknowledges your presence. Jongdae’s words take on a different meaning under Chanyeol’s scrutiny. Time passes and people change. Both Chanyeol and yourself are different people than you were four/five years ago, but should that keep you both from being in each other’s lives? You aren’t sure anymore. But, you know that you miss him. This trip has shown just how important he is to you, and you don’t know if you can live without him in your life anymore. His steady gaze seems to agree, an unspoken message you think you can decipher.

The food comes out soon after. It’s mostly seafood and it’s so damn good your eyes roll to the back of your head at your first bite.

Dinner consists of reminiscing on your college days and informing each other on future plans you haven’t yet disclosed. It’s nice. A sweet and perfect way to end your last day in Jeju. This trip has been both the quickest and longest weekend of your life. So much happened in only a few days, and the drama has been all consuming. But, between the moments of stress, your friends have been there to make you laugh and provide comfort. They are your found family who you cherish more than anything. The only thing this last night is missing is Junmyeon. He’d probably be killing you all with terrible dad jokes that only you and Jongin ever truly find funny. If he’d been privy on the whole Chanyeol situation, he would’ve probably been able to push you in a direction that wouldn’t have led to you both rebreaking your hearts on a boardwalk. He’s the father figure in the group, and his absence has been greatly felt, despite him being the main attraction.

“I’d like to give another toast,” you interrupt the conversation to say, refilling your glass. “I want to take a moment to shout out Sehun. It was your idea to make this a reunion, and you’ve really gone out of your way to plan every little thing. So, thank you. You’ve worked hard, and we wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you.”

“Yes, our man with the connections,” Baekhyun says, gesturing to the meal you all are devouring.

Sehun dips his head shyly, waving your toast away with a hand. “As Jongdae said, I cherish your friendship more than anything. Thank you for staying a little longer to hang out with little ol’ me. I love you.”

“We love you too,” Seulgi says, reaching over to clink her glass with his.

He clears his throat. “Hurry and eat this food. I didn’t get the best of the best for it all to go to waste.”

You all jump back into your meal, basking in the love you all hold for each other. 

And thus concludes your last day in Jeju.

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taglist @byunparklimchoi, @notyuji @hisungovenaocare @theawesomehero7714, @kawaii--mommy, @ohsehunsgurl

[simpinberry]

for my mental health i need hcs of bella ramsey x fem or gn reader with words of affirmation love language ‼️‼️

hi guys i’m back to feed you some more bella content ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ hope i did this right and that u guys like it :) also tysm for the requests

listen listen!!! after taking a shower she would 100% leave sweet compliments on the foggy mirror for u to read. will add ‘kiss your s/o’ to your to do lists.

will text/send photos of random things that reminds you of her throughout the day. she does this especially when she’s on set and you guys can’t talk much. they have your favorite snack there? sends u a photo and tells u theyre thinking of u. lots of i miss yous, love yous and that she can’t wait to be home to see u again. “text me abt what you get up to today babe” “pedro is making fun of me because i’m apparently such a simp for you, he is absolutely, in every way, correct ;).” “i saw a butterfly today n it reminded me of the pretty tattoo you have”

will watch u like the weirdo she is when you’re getting ready in the morning. sneaks up behind u and repeatedly attacks ur face with kisses. “i have the most beautiful gf in the world” “omg i love this purple eyeliner on you, it rlly suits you” “your curls look really defined today, the new conditioner you got is so good!! my beautiful bby”

is the type to whisper compliments in between kisses. yk like corny spelling out of i love you in between pecks? yep, does that. “i really really like you” “my darling” “mine” “you’re so cute” in between kisses hehehe.

spam texts you when you send/post a photo. in your dms/comment section screechingggg!! my mans is DOWN BADDD. needs and loves to comment “first” on ur posts. they actually make up most of ur comment section. “BABE IM DYING YOURE TOO BEAUTIFUL” “so glad we’ve advanced technology so i can stare at this photo 4life if i want to” “you+this dress= my death”

randomly tweets a photo of you, captioning it “this is my darling, be jealous, gn”

very validating when you’re upset and talks you through it. thanks you for speaking up and communicating abt anything that’s been bothering you. SPILLS THE TEA WITH YOUUU. you have a co worker you hate? she hates them too. listen to me when i say she is on ur side, she is shocked and they’ll even remember stuff you’ve previously told them to add to the fire. best bf frr “thank you for telling me babe, i’ll really keep it in mind next time, i’m so sorry for hurting your feelings like that” “it sounds like it’s been difficult for you to complete (insert task) you’ve been working through it so well :)” “he said what??? yeah like he’s one to talk, go go! continue tell me more i’m invested” “babe you’re honestly so right, this is why i always listen to u”

definitely acknowledges you so so much when you accomplish something. will go on about how proud they are of you, how well you’ve done and how wonderful it is. big or small, bellas on her way to pour her heart out to you. would be unbelievably encouraging throughout the process too, telling you to keep going and trust the progress. “you’ve got this babe, go on :))” “that drawing is absolutely amazing, you’re so talented omg look at the details” “you submitted your assignment?? ahead of time?? that’s my girl frr” “these cookies are amazing, thank u sm for baking them ughh give me a hug you’re the best baker ever, they’re so soft!!”

you guys will be facetiming one night when shes away in a different country for filming. she’s been gone two months and you really miss them. you get a bit emotional talking abt it and they really listen, telling you to let it out. just before you guys hang up they tell you to look at the last drawer of your jewellery box. turns out she wrote you a letter before she left, many letters in fact, for when you really miss them. you can’t help but sob reading it. she attached a polaroid photo of you guys kissing at bottom of the page. she’s so incredibly kind in the letter, telling you how wonderful its been getting to know you these past few months. "hehe youre probably crying from how nice im being" istg this mf even teases you in writing. when you're finished you call her back, they immediately burst out laughing at your blood shot eyes, “hahahhs i knew you’d cry”. sneaks in a ‘you look so pretty even when you cry’. tells you they have more hidden around your room and that when you need it she’ll tell you where you can find more ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ

goodnight!! if i made any mistakes, no i didn’t. byebye!!