#it’s feeding my obsession and it’s also so cute I cried

[topthreedetectives]

death note x pokemon!!

i've been formulating pokemon teams for death note characters, figured i'd put them here. i haven't perfected light's team but he 100% has a charizard and an umbreon. there's a few others i don't have solid teams for, but if i complete them i will post them!

there are a good chunk of mons that are in large part there mostly for aesthetic purposes, so keep that in mind!

if anyone has any cool changes for the current teams or thoughts on characters not shown feel free to share :D

starting with L's team!

his first pokemon was given to him by watari, and it was a shiny rowlet (it's shiny because it fits the team's aesthetic but my justification is watari's rich as hell so of course he can get L a shiny starter mon). the whole line gives off big watari vibes, it even turns into a sharpshooter!! perfect for protecting the world's greatest detective.

he's got a shiny umbreon who serves the role of partner pokemon, and they have the closest bond in the team (except maybe decidueye, but they're pretty much at the same level.) it parallels light's own umbreon, who also serves as partner pokemon to light. it's complete coincidence they both have umbreon (just further proves that they are perfect for each other >:D )

he has an alcremie because of course he does!! he loves sweets, and since alcremie make the best whipped cream for desserts, he HAD to have one. specifically the vanilla cream kind with strawberry candies.

next is metagross because metagross is way smarter than a supercomputer and L has always been really into technology. having one around is very helpful for his investigations.

he has an experiment gone (sorta) wrong, a porygon-z. it's difficult to work with, but L has managed to figure out how to work with it anyway. yet another technology mon to feed L's tech obsession.

last mon on his team is a bronzong. because he hears the bells. obviously. also, when bronzong lets out warning cries, which sound like bells tolling, it can summon rain. i mean, come on. he can't not have one on his team.

now that L's main team has been explained, it's time for another group of pokemon L has-- his contest mons!! L is really into pokemon contests and participates in them frequently (he always wins, of course). he's even got a pokemon for each type of contest category!

the alcremie and umbreon are from his main team, they just also participate in contests. he has a luxray who is also used for protection on top of contests since they can see through walls. very cool, very useful. (also very indulgent for me since luxray is one of my favorite mons.) he loves food pokemon so naturally he's got some more on top of alcremie. speaking of which....

he's got even more!! the others aren't used for battle or contests, he just likes having them around <3

you may think that he has an insane amount of pokemon and would struggle to care for them all while working on cases and participating in contests so much, and you would be correct. which is why watari has it all taken care of :D (that poor, poor man)

next up, we've got misamisa's team!

were most of these mainly an aesthetic choice? yes! and there's a very good reason for it. misa would totally have a team of cute mons that match her aesthetic!! since she's a model, she also uses them in her photoshoots and they themselves are very famous pokemodels.

her main partner pokemon is spinda. it doesn't fit in with the rest of the team's aesthetic, she was just completely encapsulated by it and its adorable silliness. she HAD to have it. they are now besties.

misa isn't very interested in pokemon battling, so her team isn't fully evolved. but you know what she is interested in?

that's right, pokemon contests!! she's not only famous for her modelling career, but also her pokemon contest skills!

each one of her pokemon sans spinda have their own contest category they specialize in.

she's one of the top contest participators, only ever bested by L. they are very close competition, however. while light is L's competition in regards to intellect, misa is L's competition in regards to pokemon contests. they are able to bond over their shared interest and frequently hold their own at-home contests during the time L is chained to light. they force light to participate as well, much to his dismay.

the rest of the task force think it's a waste of time, besides matsuda. he LOVES watching them. he's always been a big fan of misamisa's appearance in contests and is overjoyed that he gets to see her compete up close :>

next is god of the new world, light!

while i don't have his team fully fleshed out, there are some pokemon he has outside of a battling team.

there's the family litten, who doesn't care much for any of the other household members. it spends most of its time curled up in light's lap during his study sessions or while he's cleansing the world of sin.

the other is an applin given to him by his mom. he doesn't care for the applin much, but there is someone who does....

light started breeding applin in response to ryuk's extreme desire to eat his own. he puts up a front to his family, saying it's a hobby of his he's been getting into. he makes money selling the applin and ryuk gets to eat one every now and then instead of eyeing light's applin or making him buy more apples, so he isn't bothered by it (he secretly enjoys figuring out how to breed for the best IVs and natures possible, but he's not gonna tell ryuk that)

his applin has a special ribbon so ryuk won't mix it up with the others-- ryuk is absolutely forbidden to eat the one his mom gave him.

his litten also helps hatch the eggs a bit faster. it doesn't have flame body, but it's still able to warm them up so it helps, even if just a little.

next up, rem!

yes, she has two shinies. they just work so well!!!

shiny hisuian zoroark is so perfect in every way i just can't. it's the "embodiment of death", which fits very well with the whole shinigami thing, and it looks so fucking rem coded. actually perfection. also, although i don't have ryuk's team ready yet, he does have a normal zoroark which i think is pretty cool >:]

she has a shiny gardevoir because, uh, of COURSE she does!! gardevoir is the protector pokemon. they protect the people they care about with their life, and even sleep standing up just in case they need to jump into action to save their trainer. yet another perfect mon for rem's team.

there's a gothitelle on her team because.... well.... let me just insert its black and white 2 pokedex entry: "It can see the future from the movement of the stars. When it learns its Trainer's life span, it cries in sadness." enough said. also, i think it's adorable that it matches misa's gothorita <3

the others are mostly for aesthetic purposes, but i think they work pretty well on her team regardless!

next, mello!

yet another team that heavily revolves around aesthetic, but similar to misa, i think he would care a LOT about that sort of thing. he slays so hard i just know he would want his pokemon to match his style.

he has a houndoom who he mega evolves in battles because it looks sick as hell and is strong as fuck. his houndoom's horns are sharply pointed back, showing its natural leadership.

garchomp, staraptor, blaziken, and zangoose not only fit in his team aesthetically, but they are also all very strong and courageous. most are also really hot-headed or aggressive, which works super well with his demeanor.

and his partner pokemon, lucario? well....

they can share his chocolate together c:

a little extra thing, mello has some pokemon that are a part of his mafia group.

they aren't really owned by any of the members, they're just there to chill and have a good time. maybe intimidate a few people for the gang. you know how it is.

last but not least, near!

now, you may be asking yourself, "how the heck did this child get an ultra beast on his team??" the answer to that is simple: he saw big stacked cube mon, he got big stacked cube mon. watari, being rich as hell, indulged in near's want for big stacked cube mon, so now this 13 year old has a massive, highly aggressive ultra beast (which isn't unheard of in the actual pokemon universe). where does he keep it? idk, that's for watari to figure out (that poor, poor man)

his shinx and metang are related to L's luxray and metagross, respectively. they were given to him by L himself when he saw near's potential.

meowstic and shiny reuniclus not only fit the aesthetic, but are extremely powerful/intelligent psychic types. it's mostly aesthetic tho.

he has a shuppet that he loves to play with. it not only serves to spend quality playtime with him, but feed off of any negative emotions near is feeling as well. he's super calm and collected most of the time, and while his shuppet isn't the whole reason, it definitely helps him keep his cool when the other SPK members are dropping dead around him.

while not a part of his team, he does have a bunch of magnezone that serve as a kind of satellite. they don't function exactly the same as his actual satellites, but they are still very useful to him in their own way.

and that concludes what i have so far!

.♡ thank you for coming to my ted-talk ♡.

[iivari-ii]

is my growing obsession with Remy LeBeau finally gonna make me actually start reading Xmen comics?

probably—

[cash-111]

Random filth,

My hcs for the Slytherins

Pairings: female reader x Theodore/Mattheo/Draco/Enzo/Blaise/Tom

CW: explicit talk of sex and kinks under the cut.

A/N: it’s that time of the month. Don’t come for me.

You can tell I got tired near the end lol

Theodore is an absolute munch. I see him being obsessed with oral far more than any of the others. He’s had a rough day? Smothering your lips until you squirm, and everything else is drowned out by your cries of pleasure, will cheer him up. He’s had a particularly good day? Gotta celebrate with his favorite activity, which, coincidentally, includes his favorite person.

on this line of thinking, I could see him being into food stuff. Especially for Italian!theo, food is super important in Italian culture and I can see it being a big comfort for him, if not just something he finds pleasurable. He’ll feed you strawberries, fill you a nice glass of wine, and ‘accidentally’ spill some chocolate fondue over you… well, your clothes are ruined now, so you might as well take them off? Just lay down and let him take care of the sweet mess he made, just for him to make an even worse one out of you. <3

Hot take, but I think Mattheo is a switch. He’s got that sweet burnt out golden child flare: high expectations and in turn high standards for himself, all the while upholding a public reputation (good or bad). I think this flows into spikes of dominance and/or submissiveness; he can absolutely be arrogant and imposing, he’ll have you melting and behaving for him one way or another, but we all crave intimacy and the freedom to be vulnerable too, and he’s no different.

Those times he wishes you would take care of him too, let him be whiny and delicate, breakable. He’ll grip at your flesh like a thirsty man grapples at water, thrusting up with you lazily, whimpers against your soft skin about how “you feel so good… so good” spilling over and over from his mouth.

I also think he carries a lot of guilt with him, so on a particularly bad day he’ll let you completely ruin him, rub him so raw he cries for you to stop. His throat is soar, his chest puffing, and his lips a slick blood red from all the biting and drooling. The overstimulation is too much, but even though he could easily break free, he surrenders, hoping the hot of his skin will burn down all of his impurities.

I’m sorry to all my tall girlies, but I think he’d have a thing for size difference. If you’re shorter, it’s just so perfect to him: he loves to make fun of you, rile you up and savor the cute spectacle you make for him; he loves how he can encompass you when you sit on his lap, and has to fight the urge of eating you up every time you’re in public; and when you hug his waist, hold his bigger hand, or do anything stupidly cute, he just wants to scoop you up and whisk you away. And he probably will.

Draco is similar in the way he also has high expectations to deal with, but I think he’d see it more as a loss of control, with his father cutting out a perfect path for him, his wish is to take his fate into his own hands. This results in a more domineering nature during sexy times, but I don’t think he’d ever be outright disrespectful, even on the spur of the moment.

Unless you ask for it, he’s not the type to let all instinct take over and risk hurting you. I adamantly believe in mama’s boy Draco, he may not respect dreadful Potter, or be influenced by a strict purist household, but he surely respects women.

One word. Possessive. What’s his is his and once you commit there’s no going back. He’ll guard you like a dragon does to his stash, a hand unconsciously always searching for you: an arm draped over your shoulder, curled around your waist, fingers laced with yours, or a firm grip on your wrist when he’s more nervous.

For this reason I think he’s hand-dominant when it comes to pleasure. He wants to feel, feel, feel. When he’s caught up in the delicious delirium you cause him, his hands will be all over you: your breasts, neck, arms, thighs, waist, there isn’t a stone left unturned. He’ll definitely lose himself in the trance of all the sounds he can get from you while his fingers are buried deep into your warm, pulsing core. And don’t you dare look away from his eyes, Merlin knows what happens when you do.

Some would have you believe Enzo is the most innocent of the group, but I actually think that boy is a wolf in sheep’s clothing: with a fervid imagination and a lot of love to give, Enzo is helpless to his mind’s work when it comes to you.

He will try not to let it show, but images of you plague his mind and blur his vision, so much so that he tries to avoid you, but, instead of toning it down, your absence just makes his fantasies that much more desperate.

Only one freaky (and with a solid parental background) enough to consider sharing you. He’s obsessed with your pleasure, he wouldn’t mind sitting back for a bit and just observe you, he knows all the sweet sounds you make are for him.

Hot take, but kind of a sadist (in a sweet way). Mf loves to watch you unravel and ‘humiliate’ you about it; would coo and say filthy things in your ear, a hand to the neck or on your hair when you both get really into it. I see him having switch up moments sometimes where something more primal engulfs him, it’ll have him rail you to the end of tomorrow in a way so contrasting to the sweet person he is, you’d wonder if it’s even him, but you can’t really think during those times…

Blaise is a chill man, I don’t think he’d have many depravities, but he’ll try anything at least once, if it’s to your liking. And you can bet he’ll give it his all, he just wants to have a good time with you, so it’s only natural he’d give everything a fair shot. Very soft top of him.

Only more out there thing I really see him actively bringing into your relationship, would be semi-public escapades. I think he loves the thrill of having you two almost caught, and certainly enjoys making it into a game of who can get the other to break first, before going back to a more secluded, private, area.

He will have you squirming in your seat during meals, or in the back of the classroom, hand stuffed down your panties. You’re helpless to stop him, a hand gripped tightly around his wrist, while the other tries to muffle any whimpers he tears from you. He’ll smirk as he wets his lips, acting like you’re the only compromised one (while his cock strains painfully in his tight uniform trousers, tip leaking and crying for attention), and whisper into your ear, his other hand tracing featherlight on your other side. “Just admit you need me��. He’s an ass, but you do.

What I need you to understand for Tom, is that, in French spirit, his whole stigma is about being grand and iconic (💅) , he’s a psycho and you’re his devoted pet.

Will hold you a collaring ceremony. You’re his pretty little thing, in the literal sense. You’re his possession, and as such you will do anything for him. If you’ll be good, he’ll make sure to take care of you. Since you’re an extension of him, he can’t have you being damaged or neglected (in the face of the public. That’s very important). You need to shine for him, like a pretty jewel: make him proud. Unless you want to be bad, reject him, demean him. Then he’ll have no mercy, using you as an outlet, bullying you with his cock, until you forget where you are, and throwing venomous words at you, until you remember your own place. (… and who knows, maybe you planned for it)

Isn’t affected much by physicality, but is absolutely obsessed with lingerie. He finds it classy, intriguing. He’ll bring you endless racks of it: you’re expected to try each and every one, and always wear it when meeting him. Also perfumes, he’s very opinionated and has a sensitive nose, which he’ll push deep into your neck when he unravels upon you, groaning against your marked skin.

[exhaslo]

Hello exhaslo! I was wondering if you could write something for me🥺

I had this idea in my head for a while. ( Don't mind my English, it's my second language-) Soo can you write about Psycho Miguelx shyreader? I want to see miguel stalk reader, obsessed over reader, steal her clothes or panties for "whatever" purpose.. watching her sleep like a psycho- you know-

Until one point he kidnap and locked her up. Torture her but he still love her like a crazy obsession (dark scene maybe). He would try to be good to her (like try to bath and feed her) but she's just doesn't cooperate and miguel piss off easily.

If you do write it pls tag mee? This is my first ever request in thumbler. (I don't know how this app works) 🕴️

Hello! Hello!! Gotta love me some crazy Miguel. I'd feel like after a while a shy reader would give into the psycho bc they'd be too scared to escape. Maybe like Stockholm Syndrome?

I believe you will already receive a notification since I'm replying to your request, not quite sure how it works either, haha.

Warning: MINORS DNI, Smut, stalking, kidnapping, p in v, Stockholm syndrome, abuse, will try and make this as not concerning as possible, but if you remotely are not comfortable with any of these topics then I highly suggest avoiding

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Spiderman is a hero! Spiderman does nothing wrong! Spiderman will help the citizens of Nueva York! Spiderman! Spiderman! Spiderman!

"Silence." Miguel hissed lowly.

It was a quiet night aside from the constant voices that reminded Miguel of his responsibility. The annoyance that he had to burden himself with and live to those standards. So many people treated him like a God. Everyone worshiped him, but none of them were willing to give him what he wanted.

At least, until you came along.

Miguel sat against a building, watching you leave work. It was only a short while ago that you started to work for Alchemax. You were a ray of sunshine in Miguel's life. He had to have you for himself. A beautiful, shy angel who just moved into the city.

His angel.

Miguel had already approached you at work, revealing to be the kind coworker to help you with anything. He wanted to start off well, at least the side that he was going to show you. Afterwards, he was going to find out everything about you as Spiderman.

"She lives so close to me," Miguel whispered, watching you enter a building.

His eyes sparkled as he followed your sweet scent up the floors. Once you stopped and entered your apartment, Miguel nearly groaned at the sight. He watched from the window as you stripped and prepared for a shower. Such a clueless beauty.

"She left her window unlocked for me," He whispered, entering your apartment.

You were humming quietly to yourself as you showered. Such a soft and low voice that should only be for him. Miguel would listen to you forever, but he didn't want you to catch onto him, yet. Grabbing your panties, Miguel inhaled towards you scent, groaning lowly.

"H-H-Hello?! I-Is...Is anyone there?!" You squeaked, turning the water off.

Miguel cussed to himself, quickly fleeing the scene. He stuffed your panties in his pocket and watched as you hesitantly stepped out of the bathroom with nothing but a towel and a bottle of shampoo. How cute. Like that was going to stop him.

"P-Please...I-If anyone is...is there...I-I don't have anything." You cried, shaking in fear.

Miguel resisted a chuckle. You had everything. You were everything. Miguel was going to have you for himself. He just needed to wait for the right time.

-------

"I-It was so scary! I-I really thought someone broke in!" You cried your eyes out at work towards Miguel.

"Don't cry, amor (love)." Miguel whispered, wiping your tears away with his thumb. You sniffed, staring at your wonderful coworker,

"S-Sorry...I...I just...I didn't expect this...I'm new to the city...and...and I just..." You felt your lips quiver as you tried to think, "A-Also, my underwear disappeared...m-maybe my apartment is haunted!"

"I'm sure you just misplaced them," Miguel lied knowing full well that your panties were now covered in his cum, "It could be the stress of moving to a large city. It will take some time to...adapt," He whispered, patting your head.

You rubbed your eyes, smiling brightly towards Miguel. He was just a nice coworker and good looking too. You were happy to have gotten close to him during your stay here. Thanking Miguel again for letting you vent, you pecked his cheek before hurrying off to work.

Miguel just smiled wickedly as he watched your scurry off. Those hips of yours just begging to be grabbed by him. Your soft voice just waiting to cry his name out. Miguel needed more of you. He had to have more of you.

---------

There he was again, outside your window, watching you walk around your place half naked. Oh, how tempting you were. His shy little angel just walking around in nothing but your panties. You were just asking him to go in there and fuck you.

Miguel decided to leave your clothes alone today, for he had something else in plan. He waited for you to fall into a deep slumber before entering the apartment. His eyes sparkled brightly as he saw you clearly in the dark.

"Oh, my lovely (Y/N)," Miguel whispered, stroking your naked body, "I know you must be dreaming of me,"

"Mhm~" You shifted slightly in your sleep.

Miguel hummed quietly as he started to stroke his dick beside your bed. He wanted to touch you, but he was afraid of waking you. Miguel had to be patient. Resisting a moan, Miguel kept pumping his dick to the sight of you sleeping. Oh how he wanted to see you wrapped around him.

"Fuck," Miguel whispered as he cummed over your body.

He sighed softly in relief before cleaning you up. He didn't want you getting anymore scared and locking your windows. Once you were cleaned, Miguel swiped the panties you were wearing and left to finish relieving himself at home.

---------

"I-I don't know what to...to do. I-I've never been asked out before," You whispered, hiding in Miguel's lab.

It had been another week of your panties going missing and you were officially scared. The last two nights you had stayed at a coworker's place, wanting to sleep easy. This made Miguel angry. He couldn't find you and now someone had the nerve to confess to you?

"M-Miguel? A-Are you okay? I...I can come ba-"

"I'm fine, just haven't slept well these past two nights." He told you. You slowly approached him, stroking the bags under his eyes,

"Oh, Miggy. I'm sorry! I-I've been ranting this whole time while y-you're this tired!" You whined softly. Miguel grabbed your hands, kissing them softly,

"Dios Mio (My god), you make me want to steal you away, (Y/N)." Miguel whispered, watching you grow flustered, "Will you let me do that?"

You squeaked, feeling your cheeks grow hot. Honestly, you weren't expecting that from Miguel. Yes, you liked him a lot, but this was straight up flirting. Trying to hide your face from embarrassment, you just smiled, wanting to play along.

"S-Sure," You said sweetly.

--------

You whimpered lowly as you slowly felt yourself come to your senses. You vaguely recalled what happened before you lost consciousness. It was time for you to clock out and you saw Miguel waiting for you. He offered you a ride and then you knocked out.

Rubbing your eyes, you looked around and noticed that you were in an unfamiliar bedroom. Tears started to form as your heart raced in fear. Even your clothes were changed. You were wearing a long night gown.

"M-Miguel...A-Are you there?" You cried softly.

Crawling off the bed, you gasped as you felt something tied to your foot. You whimpered, spotting the cozy chains that held your ankles in place with a long chain connected to the bed.

"(Y/N), you're awake." Miguel hummed as he entered the room with a tray of food, "I brought you dinner."

"M-Miguel...I-I'm scared..."

"Shh, it's okay, baby. I know, but it's all going to be okay now. You did give me permission to take you away after all." He said with a sadistic smirk. You trembled slightly,

"I-I thought...y-you were just...just flirting..." You tried your best not to cry, "M-Miggy, p-please...I'm scared."

"I'm going to take good care of you, (Y/N)"

Miguel placed the tray to the side and crawled onto the bed. He pulled you closer to him and captured your lips into a forceful and deep kiss. You were shaking as you tried to push him away, but he was too strong for you.

You whimpered as Miguel's tongue ravished the inside of your mouth. His hands holding your wrists in place as his body pinned you to the bed. You were terrified. The man you thought who cared for you was a psychopath.

"You taste just as sweet as your panties," Miguel whispered, pulling you onto his lap and grabbed the tray.

"W-Wait...y-you took...h-how?"

"Ah, since you're going to be my wife, I suppose you should know. I'm Spiderman. I've been watching you, making sure no harm came to my beautiful wife,"

"H-Huh!?"

Your face turned bright red at the thought. This whole time it was Miguel who snuck into your place and stole your underwear. Now, he had stolen you. Trying to free yourself, you whimpered as Miguel forced you back into his lap. You cried, feeling his bulge press into your ass.

"Don't cry, eat. You need your energy."

"N-No! I want...I want to go home!"

"You are home!" Miguel yelled.

Sighing heavily, Miguel watched as you shook in fear and covered your ears. He moved the tray away and turned you around to face him. He wrapped his arms around your waist and rested his head in the crook of your neck. You were crying. Shaking in his arms.

"I won't ever hurt you, (Y/N). I promise to take care of you." He whispered.

--------

It had been a week since you were held hostage by Miguel. Each day he brought more of your stuff to his place, wanting you to feel comfortable. You couldn't forgive him though, but you were too scared to disobey him.

You poked your head out of your room, spotting the front door open. Miguel had placed an ankle bracelet on you, but that couldn't stop you from trying to escape and getting someone to break the device. You just needed to be fast.

Hurrying towards the door, you yelped as you got yanked back. You cried as webs locked your arms behind your back. Miguel approached you, bending you over the living room table,

"Oh, (Y/N), why are you trying to leave?" He asked, pretending to sound hurt.

"M-Miguel...I...I..." You knew better than to lie.

"I'm going to have to give you a punishment."

Tears rolled down your cheeks as you felt Miguel tear your panties off. You begged him to forgive you, but Miguel had already started to grope your ass. You trembled and whimpered as you felt his fingers rub your folds.

"I know you love me, (Y/N), you're just confused right now." Miguel whispered in your ear as he started to pump his fingers into your pussy.

You gasped and whimpered, trying to distract your brain. Miguel's thick fingers were stretching your pussy out, making your body grow hotter with each pump. You cried out a moan as his fingers curled and rubbed your gummy walls.

"See, look how wet you are. Just stop trying to lie to yourself."

"M-Miguel," You whimpered, your face pressed against the table, "I-I'm scared."

"Shh, you'll feel so much better after this. Honestly, it isn't even a punishment, baby."

Miguel chuckled darkly as he pumped his fingers faster into you. Your juices spilling against his fingers and onto the table. You cried, arching you back as you cam against his fingers. Miguel hummed to the sound of your moans and your throbbing pussy.

"Good girl,"

You panted heavily, shaking from your high. You yelped as you felt Miguel grab your hips and something thick poke your hole. You tried to raise your head, but Miguel pushed you back down. He lifted your hips and shoved his dick inside you.

"Ah! M-Miguel! S-Stop!" You cried, taken back from the pain.

Miguel slapped your ass as he pounded your poor cunt. Groans and moans escaped his throat as he finally enjoyed the feeling of his dick inside you. Your tight gummy walls sucking him in so much. The sounds of your bodies slapping against each other. Everything about his moment made him horny.

"Fuck, (Y/N), I've been waiting for this. You feel so fucking good. Your pussy just loves my dick. You're doing so good." He rambled, slapping his hips into yours harsher.

"A-Ah~ M-Mig~ W-Wait...I-I'm d-dizzy~" You moaned out.

"You're doing so well, baby. Just relax for me,"

You whimpered lowly as you felt your mind grow hazy. His dick was thrusting so deep inside you that you swore his tip kissed your cervix. Your body shook and trembled as it grew hotter. Another knot forming as you felt the pain turn into pleasure.

"Mhm~ M-Miggy~" You cried out, feeling your orgasm approaching.

You wanted to hate this. You wanted to, but you couldn't deny that deep down before he kidnaped you, you wanted this. Before Miguel showed his true colors, you liked him a lot. You weren't sure if it was your past emotions and feelings, but you were giving into him.

"Good girl, such a fucking good girl," Miguel groaned as you cam against his dick, "See? Already used to me."

Miguel inhaled to the sound of your moans and sobs. He grunted as he slapped his dick deeper into you, filling your womb. He let out a sigh of relief before removing the webbing from your hands. He flipped you over, enjoying your fucked out expression.

"I'm not done with you, baby. I'm going to show you how much I love you."

--------

It had been a year since Miguel kidnapped you. You weren't sure when, but eventually you gave in to him. Miguel was only trying to protect you after all. You were just being unreasonable. He loved you so much and you finally shared that love.

"M-Miguel, W-Welcome home...I...I made you dinner." You whispered shyly, gripping the bottom of your new night gown he bought you.

"(Y/N), how was my beautiful wife today?" Miguel hummed, taking off his mask and picking you up. You wrapped your legs around his waist,

"I missed you," You whispered, kissing him sweetly, "Miggy, can you stay home tomorrow? I...I'm a little lonely."

"Of course. I know just how to spend the day tomorrow."

Miguel smirked as you cheered, hugging him. He stole your lips in a passionate kiss, enjoying your submissiveness. It took some time, but he was glad that you finally saw what he was trying to do. Miguel knew that you loved him.

You were just too shy to admit it yet.

"Why don't we start tomorrow's plan now?"

You squeaked, covering your face as Miguel tore your panties again. Miguel chuckled lowly as he spent no time abusing your cunt with his dick. He was going to make sure that you weren't lonely anymore. What better way than to impregnate you?

"C'mon baby, tell me what you want." Miguel hummed as he slapped his hips into yours.

"Y-You! M-Miguel, I want you!!"

"That's right. You're mine."

And Miguel was never going to let you go.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Haha, kind of got a little worried with how dark I was going to make this. I hope this met your expectations!!

[kagamesayu]

more on...

shidou who hates leaving bimbo!reader's side.

c/w . implied female reader, implied smut, fluff, angst ??, possessive shidou wc: 1 k a/n . ngl this took forever and it's cause it ESCAPED me oh my... it might get messy at some point and i am SO SORRY . also im slowly becoming a shidou x bimbo!reader blog this is crazy, they're just so fun to write ugh reblogs and comments appreciated ✧*.

from my shidou x bimbo!reader pt 2

it's already a problem when you have to leave to go grocery shopping or anything of the like. he tries to find every excuse under the sun to go with you, even if he doesn't have to and you live right beside a convenience store.

"ryu baby i just need to go out and get that tiktok hair mask! you don't have to come-"

"yeah yeah shut yer trap doll i'm comin'. what if my baby needs a big strong guy to help her take her things?" he flexes his muscles, smirking as you gulp.

and you're too sweet and dumb to remember that you only need to get one thing, lowkey wanting shidou to be with you cause you always forget what you wanted to buy.

"mm...but i don't wanna waste your time ryu..."

"what if ya chip a nail-"

"omg you're so right! thank you baby, you're the best!"

he'll insist on going with you and it's all fun and games until he thinks someone's looking at your cute sequence miniskirt or your tight Barbie tanktop too long.

seems like some people can't take the hint - even with his arm snaked around your waist. one thing leads to another and he's in a fight for your honour, grinning madly and thoroughly fucking up the person staring you down.

because of his reactions you tend to sneak out and get the things really quickly - this doesn't usually work out though cause shidou always has tabs on you. he's obsessed after all!

this always ens with you getting a 'punishment' which can range from having to sit on his lap and feed him grapes to letting him have all the fun he wants with you.

if you get what i'm saying ;)

it's even worse when he has to leave you for a whole different country. he regularly goes overseas for matches and you almost always go with him.

but your scatter brained self will forget the dates and there are times you can't go with him because you forgot to take the days off.

and when he finds out he's so, so sad - never mad because he never gets mad at you. loves you too much.

"doll~ oh my cute, dumb baby doll~!" he squishes your face till your lips pucker, making you look at him as he pouts at you. "why'd ya gotta hurt me like this baby~?"

"didn't mean to ryu!" your speech is muffled, fingers wrapping around the wrist of the hand holding you hostage. "forgot..."

he sighs exaggeratedly before pecking your pouted lips, pulling away with a grin. "it's okay baby. it's ok," he sounds like he's saying that for himself. "just spend all yer time with me now, kay?"

as the days creep by, he becomes much more clingy. he becomes more quick to anger on the field, scoring much more and becoming so much more aggressive in his plays.

he never brings that energy home though, he treats his baby doll with so much care, he wouldn't dare make them cry.

he only brings that drive with him into the bedroom 🥵

you've been trying to make up for your mistake by pampering him more. leaving more lipstick kisses on his face and neck and making more beaded bracelets. you'd even made him an altoid wallet with polaroid pics of you two!

not gonna say he cried when he saw this but....

you pack some pink bandaids and hair clips in his luggage, and even let him take your favourite stuffed rabbit.

"please look after mr hannah montana! he can't have gluten and seafood and he hates the colour green so please don't put him in green clothes."

"okay baby-"

"and he also needs his fluff brushed in the morning!"

"yes-"

"and he hates being in a luggage so you have to hold him in your arms!"

"anythin' for you doll~"

and when that fated day arrives he gets so, so obnoxiously clingy. singing 'i love you's and 'i'll miss you's as he hangs off your shoulders, arms snaked around you. it was like he was trying to be a part of you.

he was :) he always wants to be inside you, sexually or not

he holds you like you're his lifeline. kisses you like it's your last.

you're both in the airport, a hand holding his duffle bag, the other holding yours, mr hannah montana in your arm as you try your darn hardest not to cry. your nails are digging into shidou's hands but he doesn't say anything.

he needs to feel you clinging to him. needs to feel you need him. cause he won't be able to have you for a week and he thinks he might die thinking about it.

who's gonna kiss his 'boo boo's when he gets into fights? who's gonna paint his nails and blow dry his hair while talking about what happened at work?

who's he gonna kiss and hug and fuck?

fuck, he's going to die.

"ryu..." your whiny tearful voice breaks him from his thoughts, his grip tightening around your hand. "gonna miss you so much-!"

your mascara falls with your tears, jaw quivering as the time for his flight comes closer and closer.

"oh doll." his coo makes you pause, his hand let's go of yours only to come up to your cheek. "'m gonna call ya everyday and yer gonna send me pictures everyday, right?"

"yeah..."

"and ya got that pile of clothes in case ya get lonely?"

"course!"

"good. i'll be back so fuckin' fast baby you won't even have time to miss me~" his handsome smirk is splayed on his face, "and don't forget," he leans in close and kisses you passionately, tongue sneaking in your mouth as his hand moves to hold your throat.

when you pull away, you're breathless, panting and gasping air greedily, a string of spit connecting your lips. you don't even think about the fact that you're in an airport with his teamates staring at the two of you. you can't think about anything other than shidou ryusei.

"'m yours and yer mine, no matter where i go."

[unnerving-presence]

Hi, i just read the coochie unhooking and im in love omg 🥲💕 could we have another part with the huntress, pyra and a third one of your choice? Thank you, you're the best 👀💕

GAGAGAGGH YESSSS I LOVE THESE 😭 TARHOS HAS BEEN INFESTING MY BRAIN SO HE WILL BE THE LUCKY THIRD !!

ooc shit incoming this is literally abt them loving them thighs i do not gaf i tried to make them in character somewhat anyways hehe

could you tell i’m utterly obsessed w tarhos right now i wished i could’ve written more dear lord

i had already written this for huntress initially but i did want to revise it a bit to be more in character. still sort of experimenting with it all. enjoy though :)

♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎

Anna:

Straight confusion and a.. little bit of panic? She’s never had her prey attempt something like what you did. It catches her so off guard she practically thrashes around as much as you do to get you off of her. She doesn’t like feeling so vulnerable and very much does not appreciate it when you manage to escape the hook and her alike. She can’t shake that ghostly feeling of your thighs around her. It’s like you’re still there. She can’t discern whether she likes the feeling or not.

You’re interesting prey, prey that she enjoys hunting. She mostly does it for necessity and to please the Entity, but she likes you. She likes that. She especially likes your drive to survive. It amuses her, makes her curious about you. Anna would be angry about the ordeal thinking about it, but it simply makes her intrigued now. She simply can’t brush aside the concept of your thighs around her. It was like a warm embrace she hadn’t felt since she was a child. She likes it.

She decides she will observe you more. Watch as you speak in a language she doesn’t understand and interact with those she sees as nothing more than human animals. You’re afraid, but you’re also determined. It’s cute. Perhaps she’ll conveniently place herself near the hook she puts you on next time, just to feel you fight to survive, just to feel those thighs around her again.

Pyramid Head:

Pyramid Head would have absolutely never expected this to happen.. ever? Considering his absolute fridge of a head he’s.. startled to say the least that you managed to both effectively wrap your thighs around him AND have enough leg strength to take him down AND unhook yourself. It doesn’t all come to mind at first but he’s definitely a bit aroused. Unfortunately, that is an emotion that fades quite quickly. He has a job to do, he would very much like to get back to that. If he could get back up from the ground from his big ass helmet holding him down 😭

Pyramid Head is simply indifferent about the situation. A tiny bit excited at the though, but would quickly move on. It would certainly stay in his mind if you had done it several times over though. Some part of him is glad he has this unbearable helmet over his head, he might have had a full system shutdown had your thighs gotten too close to his face, though your thighs being around him in the first place is more than enough to turn him on a bit, not that he acts on it of course. He prioritizes his role in this realm more than anything else.

Though he won’t pass up the opportunity to listen to your cries of pain if given the chance. They didn’t mean much to him before. But now he rather likes the sound. He’d even say he rather likes you more than anything else. Maybe he should stick extra close to you from now on. Perhaps you’ll try other suggestive methods of trying to escape him. Either way, it feeds into his desire to punish and his desire for you.

Tarhos Kovács:

Tarhos is trained for moments like this, when the enemy has the upper hand. He cut through hundreds of swordsmen far more experienced than you could ever wish to be. He wields his imposing claymore and knows he strikes fear into those that dare cross him. He is anything but one to be so easily defeated. It should’ve been impossible for him to be taken down by someone in such a pathetic position as yourself. It has to be the Entity’s assistance. It has to be. He can barely get himself together again before you dash up the stairs and out of his reach. He grumbles and pushes himself up off the ground, more determined than ever to put you in your place.

You don’t survive the trial, but it’s very clear you did something to him. He’s angry, but there’s some other emotion, like a smoldering fire that was once not even worth a passing glance had suddenly burst into a wildfire. It could be confused with bloodlust. He can barely tell the difference between the two until he sees you again by the campfire next to those worthless maggots. He watches only for a moment and in that moment he wants more. He wants more of whatever you did to him.

He will never come to terms with these feelings. He believes it’s your fault. Your existence shouldn’t even be welcomed in this place. You can so easily disrupt the balance of death, sacrifice, bloodshed. He wants nothing to do with you if you think you can deter him from his rightful privilege of endlessly butchering such peasants as yourself. He hates you more than he hates Vittorio, he thinks. Vittorio was an imbecile who thought he had the answers to peace. But you? God, you actually do something to him and you don’t even have to try.

[rcamshateclub]

Hey bbg, I’d like to request Fluff headcannons for yuuji, todo, gojo and Toji!

-🧀

JJK men as your boyfriend! —

☆ pairing(s): yuuji x reader, todo x reader, gojo x reader, toji x reader

☆ part two!

☆ content warning(s): straight Fluff, mentions of ass slapping, and boobs groped bc of toji and todo. a little manga spoiler on toji’s! (?)

☆ A/N: i didn’t know if u want fluffy boyfriend headcanons but that’s wut i’m doing! hope u enjoy bae :] AND SORRY THERE ISNT MUCH FOR TODO. i don’t know his character too well. Mans disappeared in the manga lowk where is he? 😭 also lmk if there’s any errors!! oh and my request are OPEN

YUUJI —

yuuji loves to cuddle after missions, he loves it so much. he can’t help that he misses you so much. especially when you’re only with gojo because of your cursed technique

yuuji can’t help but make you feel overwhelmed in a good way with compliments.

yuuji feels like he must protect you and you the same! it’s a mutual thing because of your love for each other!!

yuuji loves to squish your stomach, butt, everything. he likes you.

yuuji LOVES to cook for you! he’ll even clean up after for you!

whenever you’re sick, yuuji knows immediately. he will take care of you all day. he makes you soup, he feeds you. he gives you medicine, he forces gojo to leave him and you alone for a week (if even…)

yuuji feels so safe around you! whenever you’re in one of your rooms’ alone, he feels so vulnerable and sometimes if he’s alone in his room, he cries. he cries because of how overwhelming his love is for you. he can’t believe he has you!

he loves to take care of you but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t like to be taken care of either!

whenever you take care of him and get worried of his wounds, you might scold him but you’re so worried you can’t help but just baby (?) him in a way.

he loves you… his heart actually might explode

he spends so much time with you, sukuna just bullies him about how smitten he is for you.

sukuna finds you cool. he uses your name actually, he respects you but he doesn’t care much to talk to you if you don’t talk to him.

yuuji wants to be with you EVERY second of the day!! he wants to be at your side and hold you!

yuuji loves whenever you see him and your eyes light up.

he loves whenever you talk about something you love.

he wants to hear all the rants you have and he wants to know what your current obsessions are! especially if it’s him

— TODO

todo is very much an ass person (sorry. i have to.) he definitely slaps your ass when he comes to see you.

surprisingly actually super caring. especially if you’re having a bad day, instead of trying to be super “gym bro” vibes about it. he’s taking care of you and asking what you need

lowk this guy would be a gym bro and a “the boys” type guy. I’m Sorry.

todo definitely carries you around everywhere

he’s the type to lift you up in air and just throw you over his shoulders and walk you to your room even if you’re 2 steps away.

he makes note of what drinks you like and buys them for you!

whenever you’re in tokyo, you love to mess with megumi but todo gets a little possessive in a sense because he thinks megumi is boring and not interesting. he doesn’t even care for women with big butts mane. (megs is a respectful kid.)

makes fun of you whenever you fall on your face

i would assume this relationship would have kissing but i feel like it would be more of a joking type of relationship.

GOJO —

MENACE ALERT. he steals everything from you. EVEN YOUR CLOTHES (ESPECIALLY IF THEY DONT FIT THEM BECAUSE OF HOW HUGE HE IS.) if they can fit like a crop top he wears them. but if you’re plus sized and always have those baggy shirts (me too bae!!), he wears them bc your scent is on them.

he’s always eating sweets, it makes you have a sweet tooth too now because you’re always with him.

toru loves you squeeze you! you’re just so cute!

he’s totally trying to get you to stop ignoring him at work. he wants hugs and kisses but you won’t even budge. the students start to wonder if their teacher was lying about being in a relationship with you.

that’s until they saw you give in when you thought you were alone. they saw him trying to kiss you and when he calmed down, you finally gave him a kiss. you better bet he was begging for more and also knew the students saw.

this guy has zero shame, no remorse, and no sense of PERSONAL space!!! he doesn’t care. what’s his is yours and what’s yours is his. he wants to be all on you. he loves being everywhere near you. gosh he’ll smell you like a little weirdo.

the students think he’s a creep, but in reality, you love satoru so much. you just try to keep social, romantic, and work life balanced. it’s hard when you’re arguing with higher-ups and you can’t go to your boyfriend who doesn’t care if his students see you both hugging and kissing. you just want the students to be comfortable and also their teacher not distracted like an idiot.

when the kyoto students see you for the first time, they wonder who you are, because you’re always on missions, you never met the students from the other school.

satoru was late, so you filled in before he came and introduced yourself! then he came and you just wanted to leave but toru made you stay because he wanted you.

you and satoru lay down at bed at night and he sometimes cries because he doesn’t know why you’re with him. he wonders what he has done right because he was a little bit of a bully in high school, he has a bad personality and he’s always being targeted. by the higher-ups and cursed spirits…

he just loves you so much and he never wants you to leave. it would break him completely. he can’t let you leave him.

though, you won’t ever. you’re always cuddled up in his chest and before you sleep, you always trace hearts on him

satoru liked PDA. the amount of PDA he tries to give in public is hilarious. he loves to poke and tease you as well.

satoru is actually a good cook btw! (he’s good at everything he does. an actually fact.) he made a dish for you while sick and you appreciate that even when he’s the strongest, he makes time for you. he makes yuuji and megumi check up on you too.

megumi has grown an attachment to you ever since satoru took him in. megumi literally loves you and tells you everything.

satoru loves to hear you complain about work because he’ll just agree with whatever you say. he just wants to hear you talk about something. he loves you so much and it shows.

satoru buys you gifts all the time!! he loves to buy you your favorite things! he also buys clothes for you! he loves to buy clothes for you!!

he also loves when you wear his. he doesn’t always wear tight fitting clothes because he doesn’t like it (but you’ve definitely convinced him to wear a compression shirt once!! it was Gorgeous.)

after a long day, he loves to shower with you or take a bath. he’s good at massages and loves when you take care of him like washing his hair. he loves whenever you take care of him (you do it every second of the day).

satoru is just super caring and loves his baby so much!! he wants to marry you. he’s so lovesick.

— TOJI

toji isn’t the best man! he’s super broke yall..

he does care for you, but he definitely misses megumi’s mom over anybody. like that’s his one and true love.

he might end up comparing you to her but he loves you too.

toji hugs on you because he’s afraid you might slip away from him.

he’s an ass slapper. he also definitely stares at your boobs.

you’ll get your ass slapped and boobs groped out of no where because of him.

he loves when you make food. it’s always so good

whenever he comes home and you’re not there, he gets super anxious but it turns out you took a quick trip to the store!

he loves to go everywhere you go if you let him.

when he comes home all bloody and needs treatment, you’re always there. he loves that you take care of him.

toji wants to take care of you but he doesn’t know how to show it. he’s afraid.

(SPOILER?) the man can’t even see his son so he abandoned him type of afraid.

toji loves you though, he kisses your cheek and hugs you all the time.

he has a major soft spot for you.

he lowk wants you to have his kids!! (again!!!)

toji can’t take you out on dates because he barely has money. you’re the one who does that.

you do a lot so the least he can do is try to make you feel loved.

you know you’re loved by him though. you see it through him.

you guys love each other and it’s noticeable. the lovesick!toji begins!!!

[newtrons]

fanfiction writers.

whenever i browse ao3 for any fic that those gods have created, i am aware that any and all fanfiction writers (other than myself) are a different breed of human. i have this here handy dandy list of things to expect when reading fanfiction. feel free to take a mental note. this might be a long one.

Rule 1: the ‘my house exploded, burned down and then exploded again’ rule.

Yes, it’s a bit of a meme. Those posts about fanfic writers suffering through the most absurd shit, and/or having the best moments of their lives, and then apologizing for being late. I myself realized this when I was writing and somehow managed to tear my nail from my toe, got sent to hospital because of my incredibly caring and also very anxious roommate, which lead to me discovering I had appendicitis and had surgery done. Here are some examples of better people than I am experiencing this:

This should be enough to tell you: these people are different to us mere mortals. So, I made this rule, which I have affectionately named, which states that when reading any fix, always expect the worst to happen to the author, because apparently the universe wants to stop them from writing peak.

Rule 2: Don’t be afraid to experiment.

I, myself, am obsessed with 5 fandoms: Danganronpa, Jujutsu Kaisen, Tomodachi Life(??? Is this even a fandom???), Persona and, last but not least, Dragon Ball (Sparking Zero is coming out soon and I’m ecstatic. I’ll try to avoid the brackets from now on because nobody likes reading these). So, obviously, if I were to be on AO3 at this second, I’d probably go for one of those.

And then, dear reader, I sorted by all fics from most hits to least.

Rule 2.5: It’s all fucking Harry Potter - Interlude

Yes, I just said don’t be afraid to experiment, but I’m stopping just to ask this:

Why is it all Harry Potter?

I kid you not, the top 3 fics, as of writing this, are all Harry Potter, sitewide. And then, beyond the top 3, there’s just more. And I get it - a lot of people like Harry Potter. I haven’t read it, I don’t particularly care for it, but a lot of people like it. I know this because I see it everywhere I go. I hear it everywhere I go. I walk down the street and I somehow hear Harry Potter in a conversation. I get home, look at AO3, Harry Potter. I log onto Twitter—

And as I get to this, I want to point out that I follow people that I have never seen mention Harry Potter. I follow people that have nothing to do with it. I follow Lythero. Fighting game youtuber with cute little bunnies who did the Silver Campaign recently. Great. I follow Opera GX, a web browser. Awesome. I follow OMOCAT, developer of OMORI, and I follow the OMORI account. Wonderful. This shows that I follow people who I enjoy seeing. I follow people I want on my feed, and yet they cannot give me the pleasure of limiting my feed to the accounts that I want on my feed.

—and there it is. Harry Potter. I promise you this does not motivate me to look it up.

And I hear your cries of ‘oh, newtrons! You silly fucking goose! Just exclude the fandom from your searches”, and I hear you. I do this. But I, the annoyance that I am, just feel a sense of rage when I see Harry Potter at all. It fills me with the urge to throw a cinderblock from my window. I apologize for my tangent.

Rule 2: Don’t be afraid to experiment - Continued.

And so, as I look through thousands upon thousands of Harry Potter fanfictions, I stumble upon a fanfiction for the series ‘Saiki K’. Awesome. Great. Synonyms. I click on it, knowing nothing about the original anime, and I read through a few chapters of a psychic guy having fun with his silly friends. And that is what motivates me to watch the entire anime, because it made me like the characters, and it doesn’t show up very often. So, please, if you see something you don’t see often, experiment. Read a BTS fanfiction if you want to go there. Read some OC work, because some of those are incredible. Feel free to dip your toes into the ‘every fandom and fanfiction ever’ kiddie pool. Have fun with it.

Rule 3: horny

Some people, unfortunately, are horny. Very much so, in fact. Obviously, I have nothing against NSFW, despite sounding more like a hypocrite by the second, but let me explain. I am like a toddler, in that I get incredibly upset with seeing something that I don’t like on some occasions. Yes, I am fine with NSFW, but I am only fine with NSFW until I cross the threshold of ‘okay, I’ve seen and read enough hardcore smut over lunch to the point where I can read it with a blank face. Maybe I should take a step back from the NSFW’. Then, when I cross that threshold and see NSFW, even if it isn’t the author’s intention, I still become filled with immeasurable pain at seeing anything NSFW. If you can avoid it, please, please don’t be a hypocrite and annoyance like me and prepare to see some NSFW. It makes you enjoy reading off of places like AO3 and Wattpad (i have never read off of watt pad but i hear it has many-a self-inserts).

ily, ty for reading.

[cherryheairt]

There's this odd thing that I always do whenever a fav fic of mine is updated... I reread the previous chapter to build up my excitement and investment again. But then you published twice in one day, so o lucky me, I got to read three chapters in one day! Additionally, this habit makes me always late to comment about previous chapters, soooo having reread the past three chapter of Dragon Dreamer, I'd like to share with you my thoughts. 🌝

Regarding chapter VII...

I love how Cregan's little pov was like

"I want her to be mine and always have eyes on her-" 😈

"-so that I can watch her grow and see her cute reactions, because it's an honor to be in her presence." 🥺

"I want to keep her in Winterfell forever-" 😈"

"-so that she can be kept safe." 🥺

"I WILL KEEP HER-" 😈

"-let me just ask her mother for her permission and her blessing first." 🥺

Also, how did I miss that Daemon called her "his daughter" in his pov when I first read that chapterrrr???!! Aaaahhh!!! He is gonna flip when he finds out someone is asking to marry her, even though we already saw in chapter VIII that he predicted it. I can totally see him and Jace ganging up on Cregan, trying to intimate him... As if a Stark can be intimidated.

I love that we already had Daenys, The Dreamer, but now we have Daenys, The Unburnt. So brilliant of you and so magical, that part! Cregan's reaction was that of an old man's who had seen so much weirdness in his lifetime that any more weirdness stopped surprising him - I loved it!

Now, about Chapter IX... I. Cried. I don't think there was a part in which I didn't cry. I cried when Cregan was confessing to her, when they got the letter, when he fed her because he just wants to keep her safe and fed with all the huggies in the world 🥺, when she got back to Dragonstone, her little encounters with Rhaenyra!

My heart broke during that group hug! Because while Daenys was thinking that Lucerys normally met her in the dragonpit, I was also thinking that he should have been there with them in that group hug. No one can make me like Aemond Targaryen after he killed baby Luke (except those Aemond fic writers whose works I read). Totally reminded me of how I cried when Daenys was in Cregan's arms crying and said "My boy..."

Her reaction to everything? I felt it all. Including how she reacted to her Jaehaerys vision and how she knew instantly that Daemon couldn't have demanded that - she knew he didn't mean it. Honestly, I would love to see more of their relationship; I hope she saves him. 🥲 This also brings me to how Helaena basically intercepted the vision; I know it's not really different from how Alys and Helaena share a dreamer braincell, but there was something odd about how Helaena believed Daenys can prevent anything. Makes me believe our special Daenys, The Unburnt is a special kind of dreamer. 👀

And now that Cregan confessed first, I think our boy might have a heart attack when she tells him she loves him. AND THAT ALMOST DIRTY JOKE OF HIS?! I LOVE CRAENYS!

I know my thoughts aren't well arranged. Sorry about that, I don't know how to express my obsession in any way other than having what I call a "a brain dump". Please, keep feeding us multiple updates a day, queen - no pressure, though.

Have a good day/night!

I do the same thing! Sometimes if there's a long break between two chaps I'll just reread the entire fic so i remember everything and get to enjoy it longer lol.

LMAO thats so real he's fighting his own demons over there while shes just 😴, he truly just wants his fiance to be safe in his protection, knowing hiw the war is mainly going to take place in the crownlands where she is stationed. He hates not knowing if she's okay, always looking to the skies for a raven or her dragon.

Him and Jace would totally gang up him, and get no reaction or a very very subtle snide comment on how no one in their family could even protect her from bullies so how could they expect to protect her from war 🥱

hehe Daemon's pov in the next chapter is gonna go crazy. He's gonna be too busy getting yelled at by his wife than he will be to reprimanded Daenys for the lil punch

'as if a Stark can be intimated' Daenys will soon be a Stark, too 🤭

Thank you! I really loved writing the fire scene, but I was scared everyone might think I made her OP or something. Cregan was mostly glad to see her safe, and knows that she'll tell him about the experience when she's ready for it.

AHH is it bad to say I'm glad you cried?? If it invoked that much emotion im so so happy 🥹

Her reaction broke my heart, it was the hardest part to figure out how to write, especially because I knew it had to be short to really show how Daenys had to cut off her emotions and just go back home asap, no time to mourn. 'my boy' has been planned from chapter one though 🤧

Canon Aemond they can never make me like you. Buttt fic Aemond 🤭 I lowk want to write a series for him, too. But he's so complicated ughh

Do you mean saves Daemon? I do have a lott of canon changed due to the fact that I just can't wait for S3 to drop just to finish this series, so I will be going off of vague book knowledge and the seat of my pants lol.

I do like their complicated relationship too. Daenys didn't like him as a kid, suspecting he had something to do with Laenor but not fully blaming him, and knowing Rhaenyra was happy to be with him. Perhaps even thinking he's a total weirdo for wanting a girl so much younger than him (we all side eye him for that). They grew to be a true father and daughter over the years, but the war is putting a strain on Daemon's relationships with everyone, even Baela, Rhaena, and Rhaenyra.

Helena and Daenys have a special connection, both being different types of dreamers. Hel had hoped Dae could save her baby, but is not had at the fact that she couldn't. She understands, due to her more lengthy experience with the dreams, how hard they are to change. I think in the show she knew about her son dying, but blocked it out and distracted herself from the shock. Like warning Aegon about the rats, she could not SEE her son dying but knew that there were threats. Her dreams are more complicated to understand because we rarely get them, and then suddenly she predicts Aemond's death and says it outright.

#CREANYS ❗️❗️

Thank you for your thoughts I adore hearing them, mine are so jumbled too, I barely understand by own brainstorm notes for the series. Hopefully another chapter before Friday, but who knows my schedule has been sporadic. Have a good night also 🤭

[thatoneluckybee]

Ahem. More Propaganda.

@fruit-gummiees HELLO.

Not So Shoujo Love Story: Rei is unashamedly obsessed with manga, particularly the shoujo genre. She spends her time ignoring real life and schoolwork and dreaming of the day the perfect boy will fall for her, and life becomes perfect! The best part? She knows exactly what everyone’s role is! Hansum Ochinchin (google translate his name <3) is the most adored, hottest boy in school, and Hanna, the most popular girl, will be her love rival! That is… until Hanna professes her love for Rei, and her shoujo dream is thrown for a loop! This Webtoon is really cute and absolutely HILARIOUS I’ve cried from laughing at this. Hanna is a proud and self-proclaimed pervert. The bullies (FOUR-AM!) practice dramatic poses in the bathroom. Rei gets a love rival for Hanna against her will. Hanna’s father is an st avid cosplayer. You never learn what exactly Hansum is, but he can photosynthesize. It’s a wild ride and genuinely so enjoyable I love it.

Homesick: Recommending this one since you’ve read School Bus Graveyard! It’s almost a “sister series” in that the fanbases overlap lots and the creators have done collabs too! Disclaimer that it’s mature for a reason. It covers a lot of dark topics and is a HORROR FOR A REASON. If you do choose to read it I can provide trigger warnings, though it may spoil some plotlines a bit. Rayne (my pfp!) wakes up on a rooftop with no memories at all and meets a boy named Samael, who quickly informs her that it’s the apocalypse. Cannibalistic creatures called murks roam the land, feeding on anything that makes eye contact. Rayne and Samael form a deal to survive, but things get really, REALLY messy when they encounter someone from Samael’s past and get wrapped up in something that might just be worse than the apocalypse. On top of it all, Rayne has noticed some strange things about herself, including terrible headaches that warn her of murks… (It’s so good I love it but good lord it gets dark. I really want to say more about it but the story doesn’t jump right into the main action or plot right away so I CAN’T WITHOUT SPOILING IT SOB.) FULL POST:

Our Walk Home: Fake Hating Trope, that’s it, that’s the description. Suisha Academy and Higasa High School have always been rivals, bitter ones at that. Akihiko Shiraishi is the top student for his age at Suisha. He’s the perfect student: charming, polite, smart, athletic, and kind to everyone. In reality… my poor guy is the most anxious little mess with no idea what he’s doing. Worst of all, he’s now being forced into the role of “rival” to Harumi Kurose, top student of Higasa, cold, terrifying, and maybe just enough to defeat Shiraishi. When we meet him, though, he is also literally just some guy, and neither really care about the “rivalry,” so they become fast friends. Whenever they’re with classmates, they’ll have to keep up the masks or golden boy and ice prince who hate each other, but when they’re just walking home, it’s a breath of fresh air to both. But if anyone else outside of school found out, their lives will become a living hell and be ruined forever… maybe this rivalry is a bit too intense. (Still int he early stages but this one is cute!)

Deathsitter: In this cutesy, cartoony, Easter-themed world, dying is a business. Beings called Reapers work tirelessly to ensure YOUR loved ones have a nice death! Felix, described as a “deadbeat drug addict with seemingly supernatural luck,” can’t stop annoying the life out of the local reaper, Lloyd, every time he nearly overdoses. Lloyd himself is an ever-busy, stressed-as-heck single father, and due to unfortunate circumstance and flakey relatives, must rely on Felix as a babysitter. The only rule? DO. NOT. OPEN. HIS. DAUGHTER’S. DOOR. Yeah Felix screws up immediately and thus ensues one the most chaotic, tragic, and comedic series of events as he reaps (ha ha) the consequences of his actions. It’s amazing. Definite trigger warning for violence, language, drug use, and blood/gore (I’m a squeamish person so it’s not bad + anything is all the cutesy pastel style lol.) FULL POST:

Castle Swimmer: Can’t reveal TOO much of this ‘cause spoilers but it’s a really really good story. In this society of “Mers” (merfolk), every kingdom has long awaited the day a mysterious, mythical being known as the Beacon arrives. He will grant each kingdom’s prophecy, be that granting them fortune or saving their lives. When the Beacon arrives, though, turns out he’s literally just some guy named Kappa who has no idea what he’s doing. Siren is the prince of the shark kingdom. The kingdom of the sharks have a curse that will cause them to suffer and become covered in scars and eventually die. The only way they can break the curse is whenever the Beacon arrives—and Siren, as predicted, will kill him. The only problem is that Siren REALLY doesn’t want to be a murderer, and Kappa REALLY doesn’t want to die, and they both are pining HARD. It’s a super entertaining series. There’s a bunch of evil witches who feel guilty if you get them a gift and they don’t get you one back. There’s a sea bunny. Kappa’s only weak spot, romantically, is teeth. There’s living sponges. There’s a Jellyfish who’s dream is to Kill. It’s glorious.

School Bus Graveyard: Ashlyn Banner is happy as a loner. Socializing is tired, and people are loud, which hurts because she has extra-sensitive hearing. Because of this, she hears “phantom noises,” or auditory hallucinations. She doesn’t plan to change, until two cousins move to school, and the MOST extraverted child on earth, Aiden Clark, decides to befriend her no matter what. She unfortunately gets partnered with him for a school project (as well as Ben, Aiden’s silent and reserved cousin, Logan, a sweet but shy nerdy kid, Tyler, a short-tempered jock character, and Taylor, Tyler’s twin sister who is so sweet and so amazing.) Everything is fine until one wrong stop causes the six to begin visiting a terrifying world in their sleep, and they begin fighting for their lives against monstrous entities whenever they sleep. (SO GOOD.)

[bibimbinge]

10 BL boys I want carnally <3

Much much love to @ayansbff for tagging me!! I hope you know what you’re in for cause tagging me in a post to simp?? ok! I have a reason to SCREAM about these men who made me question my asexuality.

Mantrisanu - Jeng (Step by Step)

nobody but my acemate (@mooniyuta) knows just how obsessed I was with Mantrisanu during the Step by Step era. When I tell ya I forgot I was ace as soon as I saw his giant 1.90m ass on screen.. I forgot I was even a person. I am a squirrel needing to climb a tree. WOW! just WOW!! Step by Step? No! Step On Me.

Jam Rachata - Tinn/Jiu (Laws Of Attaction/To Sir With Love)

just Jam Rachata in general. He’s just a few years older than me but I will call him Daddy. When I saw him in Laws of Attraction I was intrigued then I stayed for the plot then I got hooked with their chemistry. Lucky for me I’ve never watched To Sir With Love before, so I did… and I can hear the wedding bells ringing as soon as I saw how his hunky meaty goodness handle that rusted half scissors turned murder weapon.

First Kanaphan - Alan/Sand (Moonlight Chicken/Only Friends)

I’ve been salivating for this man since Not Me. I suffered through The Shipper for this man. It’s not just his beautiful handsome gorgeous self that does it for me, its also his charm. Like he’s so charming and has this aura about him that’s just warm and homey. His smile is like the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen. His eyes are just so sparkly and beautiful, if I ever meet him irl I’d probably trip over myself getting lost in them. I understand Khaotung not wanting to share him with anyone because I would do the same.

Bright - Yai (I Feel You Linger In The Air)

He’s so handsome I can cry. This man is like Jam x2. Like he has such a perfect face for male lead in romance genre. Where has he been all my life?? Maybe its Yai the character that feeds my deluluism, but when General Yai popped up in ifylita with a freakin porn stache and I wasn’t immidiately appalled, I knew I was a goner.

Neo - Boston (Only Friends)

Neo has always been cute to me. Catches my eye in every series he’s in but then Only Friends happened AND I WAS FLOORED!!! It was like ya know when you enter your teen years and that cute person you’ve grown up with had a growth spurt and you’re like daaaang when did you get hot 👀 Yeah that’s me with Neo.

Ohm Pawat - Pat (Bad Buddy)

specifically Ohm as Pat cause he was chunky and meaty and oof his arms were distracting as fuck. Anytime he showed up with that damn tank top I was like pls may I bite. He’s just so *feral animalistic growling* I personally love a man whos chunky meaty mucles and looks like they can lift me. AND HIS SMILE??? HIS TWINKLING EYED SMILE?!?!?!?! I’m gone. what a baaaabe!!!

Try imagining? alrighty if you say so 😚

Keita Machida - Kurosawa (Cherry Magic)

I remember watching cherry magic for the first time in 2020 and I was in awe. He is so dreamy and handsome. I hate to say it again guys but.. his smile!! Like I’m obsessed with him!! Both me and bestie screamed when we saw him in Alice In Borderland (overgrown blondie with roots showing and he is messy and he smokes and I was barely breathing) and then scream cried when his head EXPLODED!?!?!?!) Anyway, I’d marry this guy. like legit.

Earth Pirapat - Jim (Moonlight Chicken)

I am not done with the young dilfs. I have no other words other than !! HIM !! like I would need to make a seperate Earth appreciation post to start talking about him. This post is getting too long anyway so I’m gonna not say much here but.. just know I would drop everything for him.

Papang - Gumpa (Not Me)

my need for Papang to suffocate me in his tiddies arms is like my human need to eat to keep myself sustained. He just looks like the best recharging station. That doesn’t make sense but it makes sense.

Even going through the gif list to choose a Papang gif gave my tummy flips

Bosston Suphadach - Pruk (Between Us)

THERE’S A NEWBIE ON MY LIST WOO!!! I feel like because he hasnt been here long and has only played sub-minor parts, people forgot about him .. BUT I. DID. NOT. <3 Did you see him in between us alongside Sammy?? Yes. I too would be purposefully tripping in front of him so that he can hold me in his big strong arms. Also him and the doctor in Be My Favourite?? SIIIIICKKK!!!! Let’s just say I’m excited to watch their spinoff next year ✨

I’ve got a few more but these men are mainly the ones that I need to have. In conclusion, Big Guy, Big Arms, Big Smiles. Love them, Love Him.

thank you lovely gif makers @zhivchik @mushiemadarame @rayandgay @wanderlust-in-my-soul @kiyosuku @warmday @sunsetandthemoon @bunnakit @daikunart and lovely moots @dramalets @drama-nonsense @mooniyuta @mooninagust @these-emo-thoughts @sparklyeyedhimbo @khaotungsfirst @blue-grama @absolutebl @troubled-mind who enable this obsession.

[hime-bee]

no horni thoughts for this art, just admiring how beautiful and handsome ulpipi is, wanna smother him in kithes (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ)♡

and O H, ulpianus DEFINITELY has a size difference kink, he's a filthy old man who gets off to being called daddy, fucking the brattiness right out of you, and using your cunt as his breeding hole. and now he's aware of just how much bigger he is compared to you and getting off to that as well like the perverted old man he is♡ it doesn't help that you keep encouraging him, what with you always acting like a brat so he'll lose some self-control and make you take all of his seed until his balls are empty.

ulpianus always has to finger you before he properly fucks you; you somehow can never get used to just how thick his dick is despite always being so eager to get fucked by him. and he knows you like it because you're always grinding back into his fingers and clinging onto him, whining and moaning in pure ecstasy as you squirt all over his hand. ulpianus never really reacts much or says anything, but he's always closely watching each of your reactions and seems to be fascinated by the way you turn into a mess when he bullies your clit with his thumb.

but that still doesn't prepare you for when you've got the real deal twitching against your fingers as you guide it to your drooling cunt. just pushing the engorged tip past your folds takes time, with you choking out cute little noises when you finally manage to take it with a sudden pop! because the sudden sensation made you cum a little. and now you have to take the rest of him, all hard and thick flesh that makes your belly feel like it'll burst because he's too big. but godspeed to you when he sees the small lil tummy bulge that pops up and down with each of his angled thrusts, the realization is gonna turn him on like crazy. as always, he doesn't say anything, but when you feel a hand start to press down on the bump, you're letting out a series of cries and moans at the sudden pressure. good luck, now you've got an insanely horny old man who really likes seeing the proof that his dick is too big for your pussy <33

also consider ulpipi getting morning wood but being a stubborn old man about it and refusing to take care of himself so you either lazily ride him until he feels better. but just to mess with him a bit, you slide a plug into your pussy to keep aallll of his seed nice and stuffed up inside. why? he gives you a look and you respond with a grin," that way i'll always be thinkin' about you daddy~♡"

You're so valid, Lati, and your taste in art is immaculate (as expected 😌) I, too, am admiring Ulpipi's handsomeness,, 😳💙

MA'AM, YOU ARE SPEAKING MY LANGUAGE!?!!? I love filthy old men, especially the ones that try to deny it or act like they're not kinky and obsessed with cute girls that shamelessly flirt with them (you're feeding their ego, however small it is, it's still present, y'know). You're gonna tell me that doesn't get him going?? A breedable little thing all but throwing herself at him and teasing him until he has no choice but to put her in her place?? 😩💦 GOD, THE CHOKEHOLD THIS MAN HAS ON ME IS ACTUALLY CRAZY--

Also mrmrprhhgp but consider.... Instead of riding him to help with his morning wood... You press your ass up against his erection and just rub up against him until he gets up and does something about it 😌 It's your problem, old man, you deal with it! I'm a liar, I'd ride that man silly fr

[cleverhottubmiracle]

Mara Reinstein has become many things in her 40ish years—a writer, film critic, satellite radio host, world traveler, friend, auntie—but one thing she never longed to be called was “mom.” Hear what it’s like to choose to defy the greatest enduring expectation of women in this month’s “Life with the Girls.”  Mara on a stoop of her own I plopped down at the cozy corner booth expecting a long-awaited catch-up dinner with a former coworker. I didn’t realize it would be an intervention with a side of bread. “You really need to freeze your eggs, Mara,” Leslie instructed me while the menus were still on the table. “It’s for your own good. By the time you realize you want to be a mother, it will be too late.” Leslie had been struggling with fertility issues, so I know she had the best intentions. That’s why I listened and nodded politely and deftly attempted to change the subject. I just didn’t have the heart to reply with the thought that instantly formed in my brain: “Look, I know I’m only 36, but that’s not happening. I’d rather spend all that money on my next trip to Europe.” Now that I’m in my mid-40s, I can say it proudly and hopefully without judgment from others: Motherhood is not for me. That’s a hard pass on cleaning up bodily fluids, helping with homework, running a kitchen, waking up before dawn and having the patience of a farmer in the spring all for the sake of being called “mom.” That’s just the small stuff! In the big picture, I do not want to be a primary caregiver who’s responsible 24/7 in perpetuity for any life that is not my own. I can’t even commit to raising a Chihuahua, let alone a child. [perfectpullquote align=”right” bordertop=”false” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]”I can’t even commit to raising a Chihuahua, let alone a child”[/perfectpullquote] Mine is not a sorrowful, she-must-have-been-raised-in-a-broken-home story. I grew up addicted to ’80s sitcoms like Family Ties, Growing Pains and Happy Days because these shows mirrored my own goofy, good-natured suburban family. Baby rain or shine, all the time, we got each other, sharing the laughter and love, blah blah, blah. As such, I always assumed (dare I say was programmed?) that I would follow the prototypical path of settling down in a leafy neighborhood at an appropriate age and raise cute, wisecracking kids. I’d be the can-do, caring mom with a career and a mortgage. Looking back, I can’t pinpoint the defining moment when that plan took a hard left. Certainly, moving to Manhattan straight out of college was a surefire sign that I wasn’t going to immediately follow in my mom’s sensible-loafer footsteps. But many of my friends also started out in shoebox-size apartments and now set several places at the kitchen table. I unofficially started reprioritizing when I logged ridiculously long hours as a staffer at a weekly celebrity magazine throughout my 20s. While my friends felt a sense of maternal duty waking up at 3 AM for bottle feedings and bad-dream reassurances, I felt a surge of adrenaline closing a breaking-news story at the same hour on a deadline night. It’s fair to conclude I was more comfortable writing about Angelina Jolie’s expanding family than starting my own. Becoming an aunt in my 30s cemented my position. I obsessed over my adorable nephew, Ryan, flying back to Michigan every chance I could get just to rock him for a few hours. I was there when he lost his first tooth and blew out his first birthday candles. But when his shit almost literally hit the fan, I yelled for my brother and sister-in-law and high-tailed it into the next room. He cried all the time, drowning out the sound of my biological clock. I wanted no part of this side of parenthood. As a special upside, Ryan and I bonded big time because I was the cool auntie who treated him like a prince and never punished him with time-outs. To this day, Ryan—as well as my niece, Leah—runs into my arms and gives me a huge hug when I walk into a room. He doesn’t even look up from his phone to make eye contact with his parents when they do the same. Even better, I get to maintain my blessedly independent life. I continue to keep strange, strenuous hours, often sitting in front of my laptop well past midnight. I’m prone to taking disturbingly long naps on Saturday afternoons after going on my 6-mile runs or bike rides. I still eat cereal for dinner when I’m too lazy to pick up takeout or turn on my stove. I check my phone like a madwoman because I’m a freelancer, scared to miss an email. In non-pandemic times, I’m a one-person mobile unit who travels almost every other weekend both for work reasons and mini getaways: The woman who checks in passengers at the Delta Airlines Sky Club lounge at LaGuardia Airport knows me. I’ve been to the South Pacific 11 times since 2004. Last year, I seriously dated a guy who didn’t even live in the tri-state area. I realize it all may sound deeply idiosyncratic, chaotic and peculiar. But it’s the existence I built for myself, and I love it more days than not. Nowhere in that description does a child fit in and, frankly, I’m not willing to sacrifice it. Some may call it selfish; I call it knowing myself to the highest degree and accepting myself for it. On bad days, I admit that I can fall into the trap of seeing photos on social media and believing that everyone from my distant cousins to the girls in my high-school French class are living their best lives because they became domesticated. Look at them raising munchkins dressing up for their first days of school! And saying precious, hilarious things! And celebrating fun milestones galore! I know most of them are truly happy, but I also know that happiness is not a one-size-fits-all proposition. I want to watch a Broadway show, not sit through a marathon dance recital. I want to go out and party for hours on New Year’s Eve, not debate when to come home and figure out what’s for breakfast the next day. Just kidding: What I really want to be able to do is stay in and sleep until 11 AM. And I can. The craziness that is COVID-19 has only underscored my feelings. In 2020, it seemed like all the fun benefits of parenthood were stripped away. What’s left during such a tenuous time? It looked to me like the stress of also serving as a teacher, disciplinarian, IT expert, doctor, short-order cook and chauffeur on a budget, with no breaks. I can’t fathom it and hold the highest respect for everyone enduring it. That includes my own parents, who let their middle-aged daughter hunker down with them for six months while New York City remained a hot spot. One night, I was so sick to my stomach that my mom ran out to Costco at an ungodly hour to buy me extra-strength Pepto Bismol, as if it weren’t obvious to me before that parenthood has no finish line. There’s a line in Sex and the City that I think about a lot. It’s one of the final episodes, when Carrie and Charlotte, now both 38, are at a playground discussing their futures. Charlotte is convinced that her friend is going to be a mom soon and is just waiting for the right guy to come along. Carrie replies with an admission: “If I really wanted to have a baby, wouldn’t I have tried to have one by now? I wanted to be a writer, I made myself a writer. If I want a ridiculously extravagant pair of shoes, I find a way to buy them.” That’s what I really should have told Leslie in that booth. Fact is, I lack maternal instinct. It doesn’t make me any less fulfilled or complete. I’m still compassionate, wise, nurturing and a fantastic babysitter. The big difference is that I then get to go home to my own place, fix a bowl of cereal and enjoy the silence. Source link

[norajworld]

Mara Reinstein has become many things in her 40ish years—a writer, film critic, satellite radio host, world traveler, friend, auntie—but one thing she never longed to be called was “mom.” Hear what it’s like to choose to defy the greatest enduring expectation of women in this month’s “Life with the Girls.”  Mara on a stoop of her own I plopped down at the cozy corner booth expecting a long-awaited catch-up dinner with a former coworker. I didn’t realize it would be an intervention with a side of bread. “You really need to freeze your eggs, Mara,” Leslie instructed me while the menus were still on the table. “It’s for your own good. By the time you realize you want to be a mother, it will be too late.” Leslie had been struggling with fertility issues, so I know she had the best intentions. That’s why I listened and nodded politely and deftly attempted to change the subject. I just didn’t have the heart to reply with the thought that instantly formed in my brain: “Look, I know I’m only 36, but that’s not happening. I’d rather spend all that money on my next trip to Europe.” Now that I’m in my mid-40s, I can say it proudly and hopefully without judgment from others: Motherhood is not for me. That’s a hard pass on cleaning up bodily fluids, helping with homework, running a kitchen, waking up before dawn and having the patience of a farmer in the spring all for the sake of being called “mom.” That’s just the small stuff! In the big picture, I do not want to be a primary caregiver who’s responsible 24/7 in perpetuity for any life that is not my own. I can’t even commit to raising a Chihuahua, let alone a child. [perfectpullquote align=”right” bordertop=”false” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]”I can’t even commit to raising a Chihuahua, let alone a child”[/perfectpullquote] Mine is not a sorrowful, she-must-have-been-raised-in-a-broken-home story. I grew up addicted to ’80s sitcoms like Family Ties, Growing Pains and Happy Days because these shows mirrored my own goofy, good-natured suburban family. Baby rain or shine, all the time, we got each other, sharing the laughter and love, blah blah, blah. As such, I always assumed (dare I say was programmed?) that I would follow the prototypical path of settling down in a leafy neighborhood at an appropriate age and raise cute, wisecracking kids. I’d be the can-do, caring mom with a career and a mortgage. Looking back, I can’t pinpoint the defining moment when that plan took a hard left. Certainly, moving to Manhattan straight out of college was a surefire sign that I wasn’t going to immediately follow in my mom’s sensible-loafer footsteps. But many of my friends also started out in shoebox-size apartments and now set several places at the kitchen table. I unofficially started reprioritizing when I logged ridiculously long hours as a staffer at a weekly celebrity magazine throughout my 20s. While my friends felt a sense of maternal duty waking up at 3 AM for bottle feedings and bad-dream reassurances, I felt a surge of adrenaline closing a breaking-news story at the same hour on a deadline night. It’s fair to conclude I was more comfortable writing about Angelina Jolie’s expanding family than starting my own. Becoming an aunt in my 30s cemented my position. I obsessed over my adorable nephew, Ryan, flying back to Michigan every chance I could get just to rock him for a few hours. I was there when he lost his first tooth and blew out his first birthday candles. But when his shit almost literally hit the fan, I yelled for my brother and sister-in-law and high-tailed it into the next room. He cried all the time, drowning out the sound of my biological clock. I wanted no part of this side of parenthood. As a special upside, Ryan and I bonded big time because I was the cool auntie who treated him like a prince and never punished him with time-outs. To this day, Ryan—as well as my niece, Leah—runs into my arms and gives me a huge hug when I walk into a room. He doesn’t even look up from his phone to make eye contact with his parents when they do the same. Even better, I get to maintain my blessedly independent life. I continue to keep strange, strenuous hours, often sitting in front of my laptop well past midnight. I’m prone to taking disturbingly long naps on Saturday afternoons after going on my 6-mile runs or bike rides. I still eat cereal for dinner when I’m too lazy to pick up takeout or turn on my stove. I check my phone like a madwoman because I’m a freelancer, scared to miss an email. In non-pandemic times, I’m a one-person mobile unit who travels almost every other weekend both for work reasons and mini getaways: The woman who checks in passengers at the Delta Airlines Sky Club lounge at LaGuardia Airport knows me. I’ve been to the South Pacific 11 times since 2004. Last year, I seriously dated a guy who didn’t even live in the tri-state area. I realize it all may sound deeply idiosyncratic, chaotic and peculiar. But it’s the existence I built for myself, and I love it more days than not. Nowhere in that description does a child fit in and, frankly, I’m not willing to sacrifice it. Some may call it selfish; I call it knowing myself to the highest degree and accepting myself for it. On bad days, I admit that I can fall into the trap of seeing photos on social media and believing that everyone from my distant cousins to the girls in my high-school French class are living their best lives because they became domesticated. Look at them raising munchkins dressing up for their first days of school! And saying precious, hilarious things! And celebrating fun milestones galore! I know most of them are truly happy, but I also know that happiness is not a one-size-fits-all proposition. I want to watch a Broadway show, not sit through a marathon dance recital. I want to go out and party for hours on New Year’s Eve, not debate when to come home and figure out what’s for breakfast the next day. Just kidding: What I really want to be able to do is stay in and sleep until 11 AM. And I can. The craziness that is COVID-19 has only underscored my feelings. In 2020, it seemed like all the fun benefits of parenthood were stripped away. What’s left during such a tenuous time? It looked to me like the stress of also serving as a teacher, disciplinarian, IT expert, doctor, short-order cook and chauffeur on a budget, with no breaks. I can’t fathom it and hold the highest respect for everyone enduring it. That includes my own parents, who let their middle-aged daughter hunker down with them for six months while New York City remained a hot spot. One night, I was so sick to my stomach that my mom ran out to Costco at an ungodly hour to buy me extra-strength Pepto Bismol, as if it weren’t obvious to me before that parenthood has no finish line. There’s a line in Sex and the City that I think about a lot. It’s one of the final episodes, when Carrie and Charlotte, now both 38, are at a playground discussing their futures. Charlotte is convinced that her friend is going to be a mom soon and is just waiting for the right guy to come along. Carrie replies with an admission: “If I really wanted to have a baby, wouldn’t I have tried to have one by now? I wanted to be a writer, I made myself a writer. If I want a ridiculously extravagant pair of shoes, I find a way to buy them.” That’s what I really should have told Leslie in that booth. Fact is, I lack maternal instinct. It doesn’t make me any less fulfilled or complete. I’m still compassionate, wise, nurturing and a fantastic babysitter. The big difference is that I then get to go home to my own place, fix a bowl of cereal and enjoy the silence. Source link

[ellajme0]

Mara Reinstein has become many things in her 40ish years—a writer, film critic, satellite radio host, world traveler, friend, auntie—but one thing she never longed to be called was “mom.” Hear what it’s like to choose to defy the greatest enduring expectation of women in this month’s “Life with the Girls.”  Mara on a stoop of her own I plopped down at the cozy corner booth expecting a long-awaited catch-up dinner with a former coworker. I didn’t realize it would be an intervention with a side of bread. “You really need to freeze your eggs, Mara,” Leslie instructed me while the menus were still on the table. “It’s for your own good. By the time you realize you want to be a mother, it will be too late.” Leslie had been struggling with fertility issues, so I know she had the best intentions. That’s why I listened and nodded politely and deftly attempted to change the subject. I just didn’t have the heart to reply with the thought that instantly formed in my brain: “Look, I know I’m only 36, but that’s not happening. I’d rather spend all that money on my next trip to Europe.” Now that I’m in my mid-40s, I can say it proudly and hopefully without judgment from others: Motherhood is not for me. That’s a hard pass on cleaning up bodily fluids, helping with homework, running a kitchen, waking up before dawn and having the patience of a farmer in the spring all for the sake of being called “mom.” That’s just the small stuff! In the big picture, I do not want to be a primary caregiver who’s responsible 24/7 in perpetuity for any life that is not my own. I can’t even commit to raising a Chihuahua, let alone a child. [perfectpullquote align=”right” bordertop=”false” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]”I can’t even commit to raising a Chihuahua, let alone a child”[/perfectpullquote] Mine is not a sorrowful, she-must-have-been-raised-in-a-broken-home story. I grew up addicted to ’80s sitcoms like Family Ties, Growing Pains and Happy Days because these shows mirrored my own goofy, good-natured suburban family. Baby rain or shine, all the time, we got each other, sharing the laughter and love, blah blah, blah. As such, I always assumed (dare I say was programmed?) that I would follow the prototypical path of settling down in a leafy neighborhood at an appropriate age and raise cute, wisecracking kids. I’d be the can-do, caring mom with a career and a mortgage. Looking back, I can’t pinpoint the defining moment when that plan took a hard left. Certainly, moving to Manhattan straight out of college was a surefire sign that I wasn’t going to immediately follow in my mom’s sensible-loafer footsteps. But many of my friends also started out in shoebox-size apartments and now set several places at the kitchen table. I unofficially started reprioritizing when I logged ridiculously long hours as a staffer at a weekly celebrity magazine throughout my 20s. While my friends felt a sense of maternal duty waking up at 3 AM for bottle feedings and bad-dream reassurances, I felt a surge of adrenaline closing a breaking-news story at the same hour on a deadline night. It’s fair to conclude I was more comfortable writing about Angelina Jolie’s expanding family than starting my own. Becoming an aunt in my 30s cemented my position. I obsessed over my adorable nephew, Ryan, flying back to Michigan every chance I could get just to rock him for a few hours. I was there when he lost his first tooth and blew out his first birthday candles. But when his shit almost literally hit the fan, I yelled for my brother and sister-in-law and high-tailed it into the next room. He cried all the time, drowning out the sound of my biological clock. I wanted no part of this side of parenthood. As a special upside, Ryan and I bonded big time because I was the cool auntie who treated him like a prince and never punished him with time-outs. To this day, Ryan—as well as my niece, Leah—runs into my arms and gives me a huge hug when I walk into a room. He doesn’t even look up from his phone to make eye contact with his parents when they do the same. Even better, I get to maintain my blessedly independent life. I continue to keep strange, strenuous hours, often sitting in front of my laptop well past midnight. I’m prone to taking disturbingly long naps on Saturday afternoons after going on my 6-mile runs or bike rides. I still eat cereal for dinner when I’m too lazy to pick up takeout or turn on my stove. I check my phone like a madwoman because I’m a freelancer, scared to miss an email. In non-pandemic times, I’m a one-person mobile unit who travels almost every other weekend both for work reasons and mini getaways: The woman who checks in passengers at the Delta Airlines Sky Club lounge at LaGuardia Airport knows me. I’ve been to the South Pacific 11 times since 2004. Last year, I seriously dated a guy who didn’t even live in the tri-state area. I realize it all may sound deeply idiosyncratic, chaotic and peculiar. But it’s the existence I built for myself, and I love it more days than not. Nowhere in that description does a child fit in and, frankly, I’m not willing to sacrifice it. Some may call it selfish; I call it knowing myself to the highest degree and accepting myself for it. On bad days, I admit that I can fall into the trap of seeing photos on social media and believing that everyone from my distant cousins to the girls in my high-school French class are living their best lives because they became domesticated. Look at them raising munchkins dressing up for their first days of school! And saying precious, hilarious things! And celebrating fun milestones galore! I know most of them are truly happy, but I also know that happiness is not a one-size-fits-all proposition. I want to watch a Broadway show, not sit through a marathon dance recital. I want to go out and party for hours on New Year’s Eve, not debate when to come home and figure out what’s for breakfast the next day. Just kidding: What I really want to be able to do is stay in and sleep until 11 AM. And I can. The craziness that is COVID-19 has only underscored my feelings. In 2020, it seemed like all the fun benefits of parenthood were stripped away. What’s left during such a tenuous time? It looked to me like the stress of also serving as a teacher, disciplinarian, IT expert, doctor, short-order cook and chauffeur on a budget, with no breaks. I can’t fathom it and hold the highest respect for everyone enduring it. That includes my own parents, who let their middle-aged daughter hunker down with them for six months while New York City remained a hot spot. One night, I was so sick to my stomach that my mom ran out to Costco at an ungodly hour to buy me extra-strength Pepto Bismol, as if it weren’t obvious to me before that parenthood has no finish line. There’s a line in Sex and the City that I think about a lot. It’s one of the final episodes, when Carrie and Charlotte, now both 38, are at a playground discussing their futures. Charlotte is convinced that her friend is going to be a mom soon and is just waiting for the right guy to come along. Carrie replies with an admission: “If I really wanted to have a baby, wouldn’t I have tried to have one by now? I wanted to be a writer, I made myself a writer. If I want a ridiculously extravagant pair of shoes, I find a way to buy them.” That’s what I really should have told Leslie in that booth. Fact is, I lack maternal instinct. It doesn’t make me any less fulfilled or complete. I’m still compassionate, wise, nurturing and a fantastic babysitter. The big difference is that I then get to go home to my own place, fix a bowl of cereal and enjoy the silence. Source link

[chilimili212]

Mara Reinstein has become many things in her 40ish years—a writer, film critic, satellite radio host, world traveler, friend, auntie—but one thing she never longed to be called was “mom.” Hear what it’s like to choose to defy the greatest enduring expectation of women in this month’s “Life with the Girls.”  Mara on a stoop of her own I plopped down at the cozy corner booth expecting a long-awaited catch-up dinner with a former coworker. I didn’t realize it would be an intervention with a side of bread. “You really need to freeze your eggs, Mara,” Leslie instructed me while the menus were still on the table. “It’s for your own good. By the time you realize you want to be a mother, it will be too late.” Leslie had been struggling with fertility issues, so I know she had the best intentions. That’s why I listened and nodded politely and deftly attempted to change the subject. I just didn’t have the heart to reply with the thought that instantly formed in my brain: “Look, I know I’m only 36, but that’s not happening. I’d rather spend all that money on my next trip to Europe.” Now that I’m in my mid-40s, I can say it proudly and hopefully without judgment from others: Motherhood is not for me. That’s a hard pass on cleaning up bodily fluids, helping with homework, running a kitchen, waking up before dawn and having the patience of a farmer in the spring all for the sake of being called “mom.” That’s just the small stuff! In the big picture, I do not want to be a primary caregiver who’s responsible 24/7 in perpetuity for any life that is not my own. I can’t even commit to raising a Chihuahua, let alone a child. [perfectpullquote align=”right” bordertop=”false” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]”I can’t even commit to raising a Chihuahua, let alone a child”[/perfectpullquote] Mine is not a sorrowful, she-must-have-been-raised-in-a-broken-home story. I grew up addicted to ’80s sitcoms like Family Ties, Growing Pains and Happy Days because these shows mirrored my own goofy, good-natured suburban family. Baby rain or shine, all the time, we got each other, sharing the laughter and love, blah blah, blah. As such, I always assumed (dare I say was programmed?) that I would follow the prototypical path of settling down in a leafy neighborhood at an appropriate age and raise cute, wisecracking kids. I’d be the can-do, caring mom with a career and a mortgage. Looking back, I can’t pinpoint the defining moment when that plan took a hard left. Certainly, moving to Manhattan straight out of college was a surefire sign that I wasn’t going to immediately follow in my mom’s sensible-loafer footsteps. But many of my friends also started out in shoebox-size apartments and now set several places at the kitchen table. I unofficially started reprioritizing when I logged ridiculously long hours as a staffer at a weekly celebrity magazine throughout my 20s. While my friends felt a sense of maternal duty waking up at 3 AM for bottle feedings and bad-dream reassurances, I felt a surge of adrenaline closing a breaking-news story at the same hour on a deadline night. It’s fair to conclude I was more comfortable writing about Angelina Jolie’s expanding family than starting my own. Becoming an aunt in my 30s cemented my position. I obsessed over my adorable nephew, Ryan, flying back to Michigan every chance I could get just to rock him for a few hours. I was there when he lost his first tooth and blew out his first birthday candles. But when his shit almost literally hit the fan, I yelled for my brother and sister-in-law and high-tailed it into the next room. He cried all the time, drowning out the sound of my biological clock. I wanted no part of this side of parenthood. As a special upside, Ryan and I bonded big time because I was the cool auntie who treated him like a prince and never punished him with time-outs. To this day, Ryan—as well as my niece, Leah—runs into my arms and gives me a huge hug when I walk into a room. He doesn’t even look up from his phone to make eye contact with his parents when they do the same. Even better, I get to maintain my blessedly independent life. I continue to keep strange, strenuous hours, often sitting in front of my laptop well past midnight. I’m prone to taking disturbingly long naps on Saturday afternoons after going on my 6-mile runs or bike rides. I still eat cereal for dinner when I’m too lazy to pick up takeout or turn on my stove. I check my phone like a madwoman because I’m a freelancer, scared to miss an email. In non-pandemic times, I’m a one-person mobile unit who travels almost every other weekend both for work reasons and mini getaways: The woman who checks in passengers at the Delta Airlines Sky Club lounge at LaGuardia Airport knows me. I’ve been to the South Pacific 11 times since 2004. Last year, I seriously dated a guy who didn’t even live in the tri-state area. I realize it all may sound deeply idiosyncratic, chaotic and peculiar. But it’s the existence I built for myself, and I love it more days than not. Nowhere in that description does a child fit in and, frankly, I’m not willing to sacrifice it. Some may call it selfish; I call it knowing myself to the highest degree and accepting myself for it. On bad days, I admit that I can fall into the trap of seeing photos on social media and believing that everyone from my distant cousins to the girls in my high-school French class are living their best lives because they became domesticated. Look at them raising munchkins dressing up for their first days of school! And saying precious, hilarious things! And celebrating fun milestones galore! I know most of them are truly happy, but I also know that happiness is not a one-size-fits-all proposition. I want to watch a Broadway show, not sit through a marathon dance recital. I want to go out and party for hours on New Year’s Eve, not debate when to come home and figure out what’s for breakfast the next day. Just kidding: What I really want to be able to do is stay in and sleep until 11 AM. And I can. The craziness that is COVID-19 has only underscored my feelings. In 2020, it seemed like all the fun benefits of parenthood were stripped away. What’s left during such a tenuous time? It looked to me like the stress of also serving as a teacher, disciplinarian, IT expert, doctor, short-order cook and chauffeur on a budget, with no breaks. I can’t fathom it and hold the highest respect for everyone enduring it. That includes my own parents, who let their middle-aged daughter hunker down with them for six months while New York City remained a hot spot. One night, I was so sick to my stomach that my mom ran out to Costco at an ungodly hour to buy me extra-strength Pepto Bismol, as if it weren’t obvious to me before that parenthood has no finish line. There’s a line in Sex and the City that I think about a lot. It’s one of the final episodes, when Carrie and Charlotte, now both 38, are at a playground discussing their futures. Charlotte is convinced that her friend is going to be a mom soon and is just waiting for the right guy to come along. Carrie replies with an admission: “If I really wanted to have a baby, wouldn’t I have tried to have one by now? I wanted to be a writer, I made myself a writer. If I want a ridiculously extravagant pair of shoes, I find a way to buy them.” That’s what I really should have told Leslie in that booth. Fact is, I lack maternal instinct. It doesn’t make me any less fulfilled or complete. I’m still compassionate, wise, nurturing and a fantastic babysitter. The big difference is that I then get to go home to my own place, fix a bowl of cereal and enjoy the silence. Source link