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caustic-light · 2 years

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You really should write and/or publish a manifesto at some point in time. You have an incredibly unique and downright awesome worldview and a degree of sex positivity that I haven't seen from any other prominent anarchists. You are the epitome of a revolutionary thinker and I believe that all Anarchists would benefit greatly from an organized study of your worldview.

Being told things like this makes me a little uncomfortable. This isn’t your fault, please don’t take it that way. But I don’t like thinking of myself as some thinker who should have a lot of influence on others. I’m just a guy with a lot of opinions and on here I enjoy the relative luxury of knowing I can afford to be wrong about things and change my mind on things and I won’t have a huge following who parrot my mistakes. I want people who engage with my ideas to be critical of me and question the things I say and because of that I react a little overly vigilant to uncritical praise being given my way when it comes to my opinions.

On a less my personal issue and more general note, I don’t think I am horribly revolutionary in my thinking. If you see me say something the best chance is I saw someone else say it first and often those are people better equipped to write a book about it than me. The only real thing I think I came up with by myself was to make a connection between rising scrutiny against public queerphobic rhetoric during the 90s and 2ks and the rise of pedo panic in that same time to fill the void of a sexual predator class to weaponize against children and sexual deviants. (A development that in light of the groomer hype is all the more transparent about what it was really about all that time.)

But I guarantee you I will hardly be the only one to have come up with that. Though I may be the only one to say it in a way that’s as plakative and confrontational as “Pedophilia doesn’t exist!*”

Here’s the thing about writing a manifest. It’s a lot of research work, which I openly admit to sucking at. It’s a lot of language games which I’m not that interested in. It’s a lot of working over my own opinions and trying to dissect how I need to put them to make them as convincing as possible and then to wager how comprehensively and fairly I am depicting each surrounding context. I don’t think I’d be very good at that. I just like to speak my mind when I have a thought and not worry that much about how fully worked out it is, or how I could help it reach a more wide spread by adding more and more context.

I have a post in my drafts because somebody asked me to specify more deeply what I mean by para rights and youth rights being a litmus test for leftists affinity towards reactionary politics that has been there for months because I don’t have the mind to actually drum up a comprehensive explanation of it. I may some day try my hand on writing a big nonfiction thing like that. But as of now I’m not interested in it. Not the research, not the work, not the potential impact.

But I guarantee you I will hardly be the only one to have come up with that.

Here’s the thing about writing a manifest. It’s a lot of research work, which I openly admit to suck at. It’s a lot of language games which I’m not that interested in. It’s a lot of working over my own opinions and trying to dissect how I need to put them to make them as convincing as possible and then to wager how comprehensively and fairly I am depicting each surrounding context. I don’t think I’d be very good at that. I just like to speak my mind when I have a thought and not worry that much about how fully worked out it is, or how I could help it reach more wide spread by adding more and more context.

I have a post in my drafts because somebody asked me to specify more deeply what I mean by I think it was

I think, to be frank, being a revolutionary thinker is kind of overrated. I’d rather be a revolutionary doer, but that requires actual work. Some of which I’m trying to do, some of which I wish I was trying to do, but am not. I think the biggest impact I have ever had in my life (outside my family and friends) is to perform with my tits out as a fat man with my band and hearing that other men, even straight men, are looking forward to seeing me because I show that it’s something that can be done. And maybe that time I took the time after a gig to talk to a kid who was really excited about our show and letting him show me Davie504 videos. Feeling like I can positively impact the lives of people around me feels a lot better than preaching to a choir about youth rights. By which I don’t mean that theory is unimportant and building an understanding of the systems of our society is unimportant, but if I can choose which parts of my life I would like to be more revolutionary in, it’s praxis. It feels better. It’s more rewarding. And it keeps me from intellectualizing myself out of my own head.

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dumbestthingiveeverheard · 1 year

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Dumbest Thing I've Ever Heard: 8/1/2023

Fifth Place: Asa Hutchinson

Despite being the only Republican running for President who I have any respect for, people need to face a rather important fact: Asa Hutchinson is not going to be President. Since the start of the 2024 race, it has been obvious that if Donald Trump entered he was going to be the nomination--and Trump has entered. This was demonstrated perfectly when Hutchinson was on CNN last night and we saw this graphic:

He couldn't even break half of one percent in any of the eight groups listed--seriously think about that.

Fourth Place: Laura Ingraham

Can we just admit that Fox News is a neo-Nazi network at this point? For fuck sake, last night brought us yet another example of a host pushing the horribly racist Great Replacement theory, with Ingraham saying:

Now, this is what Democrats have always wanted though, isn't it? An open border that would help usher in a new America. And this is what we're getting: Millions upon millions of illegals who fanned out across America with their free cell phones and dubious intentions.

I don't even know what to say about this outside of--well, this is the same thing Fox has been doing for years, and it seems like barley anybody, including the people whose job it is to monitor the right for things like this, barley notice it anymore. Media Matters barley took notice and from the looks of it no other media watchdog even mentioned it, it takes something especially offensive--like Greg's recent comments on the Holocaust--to even cause people to notice that Fox is engaging in the same rhetoric that actual fascists do.

Third Place: Steve Benen

MSNBC is easily the best out of the three cable news networks, but even they sometimes fall into the trap of not framing the story correctly. For example, Steve Benen's article on the website ran the headline "Dems slam Justice Alito’s latest claim as ‘stunningly wrong.’" However, this headline should make it a point to note that it's not merely the Democrats "slamming" Alito for saying Congress has no authority to regulate the Supreme Court, but it is them pointing out that what he said was, in fact, incorrect. This would be like claiming a teacher "slammed" a student who incorrectly answered a question on a test--except the student was also one of the nine most powerful people in the country.

Second Place: Michelle Goldberg

Her column "The Radicalization of the Young Right" falls into the typical liberal trap of having nostalgia for the terrible conservatives of the past because maybe they weren't as bad as those on the right today. The article sees her giving the benefit of the doubt to Nate Hochman, the DeSantis campaign staffer who was fired for putting fascist symbols into campaign ads, by writing:

Though the video’s imagery is clearly fascist — the sonnenrad, or sunwheel, is flanked by two rows of marching soldiers — Hochman has said that he didn’t know what the symbol meant. Given that he is Jewish, I’m inclined to believe that rather than being a covert Nazi, Hochman is simply a callow young man immersed in a milieu in which fascist idioms are so commonplace they can be picked up inadvertently.

And honestly, who here hasn't accidentally put a fascist symbol into a video? (Or made their crossword puzzle look like a fascist symbol on the first day of a Jewish holiday?)

As Hochman clearly recognized, these days, young reactionaries find their inspiration not in the adolescent superman fantasies of Ayn Rand but in the nihilistic Joker energy of 4chan.

And how exactly are those two things different? Ayn Rand wrote stories about how everything was bad in mainstream society and those on the sidelines need to take over and get rid of all of those who disagree, and that's the motto of the modern right-wing. Of course, Ayn Rand was never a source of inspiration for reactionaries, who were primarily conservative, because Rand was not one--William Buckley, the person behind the post-World War Two conservative movement, even hated Ayn Rand and pushed her out of his new right.

Winner: John O'Connor

It's not everyday you see somebody attempt to defend Richard Nixon, but O'Connor did just that in his Townhall column "How Watergate Journalism Sowed the Seeds of Today’s Toxic Division." Even ignoring the silliness of the claim that Bob Woodward, a registered Republican, would do something like take down a sitting Republican President, and that The Washington Post would use Watergate as nothing more than an attempt to take down Nixon but wouldn't release most of the information on it until after the 1972 Presidential Election (George McGovern changing running mates was covered far more than Watergate during 1972) is nonsensical, but O'Connor is here to tell us what really happened:

But what was so patently false about the Washington Post Watergate journalism? From the first days of the burglary arrests of June 17, 1972, the Post knew facts strongly showing that this had not been a White House campaign operation but, rather, was a small part of a widespread, long-lasting CIA program of surveilling prostitutes and their Johns. Inveigling seeming White House approval from lower aides, the CIA hoped to gain a get out-of-jail-free card if later exposed.

And the fact that the organization which did this was called the Committee to Re-Elect the President is--what, a really bad coincidence? For those curious, O'Connor shows no evidence for this claim--instead he just spends the rest of the column insulting Mark Felt and modern journalism.

John O'Connor, you've said the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

#asa hutchinson #laura ingraham #steve benen #michelle goldberg #john o'connor

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all-things-are-nothing-to-me · 4 years

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The New Nihilism

It feels increasingly difficult to tell the difference between—on one hand—being old, sick, and defeated, and—on the other hand—living in a time-&-place that is itself senile, tired, and defeated. Sometimes I think it’s just me—but then I find that some younger, healthier people seem to be undergoing similar sensations of ennui, despair, and impotent anger. Maybe it’s not just me.

A friend of mine attributed the turn to disillusion with “everything”, including old-fashioned radical/activist positions, to disappointment over the present political regime in the US, which was somehow expected to usher in a turn away from the reactionary decades since the 1980s, or even a “progress” toward some sort of democratic socialism. Although I myself didn’t share this optimism (I always assume that anyone who even wants to be President of the US must be a psychopathic murderer) I can see that “youth” suffered a powerful disillusionment at the utter failure of Liberalism to turn the tide against Capitalism Triumphalism. The disillusion gave rise to OCCUPY and the failure of OCCUPY led to a move toward sheer negation.

However I think this merely political analysis of the “new nothing” may be too two-dimensional to do justice to the extent to which all hope of “change” has died under Kognitive Kapital and the technopathocracy. Despite my remnant hippy flower- power sentiments I too feel this “terminal” condition (as Nietzsche called it), which I express by saying, only half-jokingly, that we have at last reached the Future, and that the truly horrible truth of the End of the World is that it doesn’t end.

One big J.G. Ballard/Philip K. Dick shopping mall from now till eternity, basically.

This IS the future—how do you like it so far? Life in the Ruins: not so bad for the bourgeoisie, the loyal servants of the One Percent. Air-conditioned ruins! No Ragnarok, no Rapture, no dramatic closure: just an endless re-run of reality TV cop shows. 2012 has come and gone, and we’re still in debt to some faceless bank, still chained to our screens.

Most people—in order to live at all—seem to need around themselves a penumbra of “illusion” (to quote Nietzsche again):—that the world is just rolling along as usual, some good days some bad, but in essence no different now than in 10000 BC or 1492 AD or next year. Some even need to believe in Progress, that the Future will solve all our problems, and even that life is much better for us now than for (say) people in the 5th century AD. We live longer thanx to Modern Science—of course our extra years are largely spent as “medical objects”—sick and worn out but kept ticking by Machines & Pills that spin huge profits for a few megacorporations & insurance companies. Nation of Struldbugs.

True, we’re suffocating in the mire generated by our rule of sick machines under the Numisphere of Money. At least ten times as much money now exists than it would take to buy the whole world—and yet species are vanishing space itself is vanishing, icecaps melting, air and water grown toxic, culture grown toxic, landscape sacrificed to fracking and megamalls, noise-fascism, etc, etc. But Science will cure all that ills that Science has created—in the Future (in the “long run”, when we’re all dead, as Lord Keynes put it); so meanwhile we’ll carry on consuming the world and shitting it out as waste—because it’s convenient & efficient & profitable to do so, and because we like it.

Well, this is all a bunch of whiney left-liberal cliches, no? Heard it before a million times. Yawn. How boring, how infantile, how useless. Even if it were all true... what can we do about it? If our Anointed Leaders can’t or won’t stop it, who will? God? Satan? The “People”?

All the fashionable “solutions” to the “crisis”, from electronic democracy to revolutionary violence, from locavorism to solar-powered dingbats, from financial market regulation to the General Strike—all of them, however ridiculous or sublime, depend on one preliminary radical change—a seismic shift in human consciousness. Without such a change all the hope of reform is futile. And if such a change were somehow to occur, no “reform” would be necessary. The world would simply change. The whales would be saved. War no more. And so on.

What force could (even in theory) bring about such a shift? Religion? In 6,000 years of organized religion matters have only gotten worse. Psychedelic drugs in the reservoirs? The Mayan calendar? Nostalgia? Terror?

If catastrophic disaster is now inevitable, perhaps the “Survivalist” scenario will ensue, and a few brave millions will create a green utopia in the smoking waste. But won’t Capitalism find a way to profit even from the End of the World? Some would claim that it’s doing so already. The true catastrophe may be the final apotheosis of commodity fetishism.

Let’s assume for the sake of argument that this paradise of power tools and back-up alarms is all we’ve got & all we’re going to get. Capitalism can deal with global warming—it can sell water-wings and disaster insurance. So it’s all over, let’s say—but we’ve still got television & Twitter. Childhood’s End—i.e. the child as ultimate consumer, eager for the brand. Terrorism or home shopping network—take yr pick (democracy means choice).

Since the death of the Historical Movement of the Social in 1989 (last gasp of the hideous “short” XXth century that started in 1914) the only “alternative” to Capitalist Neo-Liberal totalitarianism that seems to have emerged is religious neo-fascism. I understand why someone would want to be a violent fundamentalist bigot—I even sympathize—but just because I feel sorry for lepers doesn’t mean I want to be one.

When I attempt to retain some shreds of my former antipessimism I fantasize that History may not be over, that some sort of Populist Green Social Democracy might yet emerge to challenge the obscene smugness of “Money Interests”—something along the lines of 1970s Scandinavian monarcho-socialism—which in retrospect now looks the most humane form of the State ever to have emerged from the putrid suck-hole of Civilization. (Think of Amsterdam in its heyday.) Of course as an anarchist I’d still have to oppose it—but at least I’d have the luxury of believing that, in such a situation, anarchy might actually stand some chance of success. Even if such a movement were to emerge, however, we can rest damn-well assured it won’t happen in the USA. Or anywhere in the ghost-realm of dead Marxism, either. Maybe Scotland!

It would seem quite pointless to wait around for such a rebirth of the Social. Years ago many radicals gave up all hope of The Revolution, and the few who still adhere to it remind me of religious fanatics. It might be soothing to lapse into such doctrinaire revolutionism, just as it might be soothing to sink into mystical religion—but for me at least both options have lost their savor. Again, I sympathize with those true believers (although not so much when they lapse into authoritarian leftism or fascism)— nevertheless, frankly, I’m too depressed to embrace their Illusions.

If the End-Time scenario sketched above be considered actually true, what alternatives might exist besides suicidal despair? After much thought I’ve come up with three basic strategies.

1) Passive Escapism. Keep your head down, don’t make waves. Capitalism permits all sorts of “lifestyles” (I hate that word)—just pick one & try to enjoy it. You’re even allowed to live as a dirt farmer without electricity & infernal combustion, like a sort of secular Amish refusnik. Well, maybe not. But at least you could flirt with such a life. “Smoke Pot, Eat Chicken, Drink Tea,” as we used to say in the 60s in the Moorish Church of America, our psychedelic cult. Hope they don’t catch you. Fit yourself into some Permitted Category such as Neo-Hippy or even Anabaptist.

2) Active Escapism. In this scenario you attempt to create the optimal conditions for the emergence of Autonomous Zones, whether temporary, periodic or even (semi)permanent. In 1984 when I first coined the term Temporary Autonomous Zone (TAZ)

I envisioned it as a complement to The Revolution—although I was already, to be truthful, tired of waiting for a moment that seemed to have failed in 1968. The TAZ would give a taste or premonition of real liberties: in effect you would attempt to live as if the Revolution had already occurred, so as not to die without ever having experienced “free freedom” (as Rimbaud called it, liberte libre). Create your own pirate utopia.

Of course the TAZ can be as brief & simple as a really good dinner party, but the true autonomist will want to maximize the potential for longer & deeper experiences of authentic lived life. Almost inevitably this will involve crime, so it’s necessary to think like a criminal, not a victim. A “Johnson” as Burroughs used to say—not a “mark”. How else can one live (and live well) without Work. Work, the curse of the thinking class. Wage slavery. If you’re lucky enough to be a successful artist, you can perhaps achieve relative autonomy without breaking any obvious laws (except the laws of good taste, perhaps). Or you could inherit a million. (More than a million would be a curse.) Forget revolutionary morality—the question is, can you afford your taste of freedom? For most of us, crime will be not only a pleasure but a necessity. The old anarcho-Illegalists showed the way: individual expropriation. Getting caught of course spoils the whole thing—but risk is an aspect of self-authenticity.

One scenario I’ve imagined for active Escapism would be to move to a remote rural area along with several hundred other libertarian socialists—enough to take over the local government (municipal or even county) and elect or control the sheriffs & judges, the parent/teacher association, volunteer fire department and even the water authority. Fund the venture with cultivation of illegal phantastice and carry on a discreet trade. Organize as a “Union of Egoists” for mutual benefit & ecstatic pleasures—perhaps under the guise of “communes” or even monasteries, who cares. Enjoy it as long as it lasts.

I know for a fact that this plan is being worked on in several places in America—but of course I’m not going to say where.

Another possible model for individual escapists might be the nomadic adventurer. Given that the whole world seems to be turning into a giant parking lot or social network, I don’t know if this option remains open, but I suspect that it might. The trick would be to travel in places where tourists don’t—if such places still exist—and to involve oneself in fascinating and dangerous situations. For example if I were young and healthy I’d’ve gone to France to take part in the TAZ that grew around resistance to the new airport—or to Greece—or Mexico—wherever the perverse spirit of rebellion crops up. The problem here is of course funding. (Sending back statues stuffed with hash is no longer a good idea.) How to pay for yr life of adventure? Love will find a way. It doesn’t matter so much if one agrees with the ideals of Tahrir Square or Zucotti Park—the point is just to be there.

3. Revenge. I call it Zarathustra’s Revenge because as Nietzsche said, revenge may be second rate but it’s not nothing. One might enjoy the satisfaction of terrifying the bastards for at least a few moments. Formerly I advocated “Poetic Terrorism” rather than actual violence, the idea being that art could be wielded as a weapon. Now I’ve rather come to doubt it. But perhaps weapons might be wielded as art. From the sledgehammer of the Luddites to the black bomb of the attentat, destruction could serve as a form of creativity, for its own sake, or for purely aesthetic reasons, without any illusions about revolution. Oscar Wilde meets the acte gratuit: a dandyism of despair.

What troubles me about this idea is that it seems impossible to distinguish here between the action of post-leftist anarcho-nihilists and the action of post-rightist neo-traditionalist reactionaries. For that matter, a bomb may as well be detonated by fundamentalist fanatics—what difference would it make to the victims or the “innocent bystanders”? Blowing up a nanotechnology lab—why shouldn’t this be the act of a desperate monarchist as easily as that of a Nietzschean anarchist?

In a recent book by Tiqqun (Theory of Bloom), it was fascinating to come suddenly across the constellation of Nietzsche, Rene Guenon, Julius Evola, et al. as examples of a sharp and just critique of the Bloom syndrome—i.e., of progress-as-illusion. Of course the “beyond left and right” position has two sides—one approaching from the left, the other from the right. The European New Right (Alain de Benoist & his gang) are big admirers of Guy Debord, for a similar reason (his critique, not his proposals).

The post-left can now appreciate Traditionalism as a reaction against modernity just as the neo-traditionalists can appreciate Situationism. But this doesn’t mean that post-anarchist anarchists are identical with post-fascism fascists!

I’m reminded of the situation in fin-de-siecle France that gave rise to the strange alliance between anarchists and monarchists; for example the Cerce Proudhon. This surreal conjunction came about for two reasons: a) both factions hated liberal democracy, and b) the monarchists had money. The marriage gave birth to weird progeny, such as Georges Sorel. And Mussolini famously began his career as an Individualist anarchist!

Another link between left & right could be analyzed as a kind of existentialism; once again Nietzsche is the founding parent here, I think. On the left there were thinkers like Gide or Camus. On the right, that illuminated villain Baron Julius Evola used to tell his little ultra-right groupuscules in Rome to attack the Modern World—even though the restoraton of tradition was a hopeless dream—if only as an act of magical self-creation. Being trumps essence. One must cherish no attachment to mere results. Surely Tiqqun’s advocacy of the “perfect Surrealist act” (firing a revolver at random into a crowd of “innocent by-standers”) partakes of this form of action-as-despair. (Incidentally I have to confess that this is the sort of thing that has always—to my regret—prevented my embracing Surrealism: it’s just too cruel. I don’t admire de Sade, either.)

Of course, as we know, the problem with the Traditionalists is that they were never traditional enough. They looked back at a lost civilization as their “goal” (religion, mysticism, monarchism, arts-&-crafts, etc.) whereas they should have realized that the real tradition is the “primordial anarchy” of the Stone Age, tribalism, hunting/gathering, animism—what I call the Neanderthal Liberation Front. Paul Goodman used the term “Neolithic Conservatism” to describe his brand of anarchism—but “Paleolithic Reaction” might be more appropriate!

The other major problem with the Traditionalist Right is that the entire emotional tone of the movement is rooted in self-repression. Here a rough Reichean analysis suffices to demonstrate that the authoritarian body reflects a damaged soul, and that only anarchy is compatible with real self-realization.

The European New Right that arose in the 90s still carries on its propaganda—and these chaps are not just vulgar nationalist chauvenist anti-semitic homophobic thugs—they’re intellectuals & artists. I think they’re evil, but that doesn’t mean I find them boring. Or even wrong on certain points. They also hate the nanotechnologists!

Although I attempted to set off a few bombs back in the 1960s (against the war in Vietnam) I’m glad, on the whole, that they failed to detonate (technology was never my metier). It saves me from wondering if I would’ve experienced “moral qualms”. Instead I chose the path of the propagandist and remained an activist in anarchist media from 1984 to about 2004. I collaborated with the Autonomedia publishing collective, the IWW, the John Henry Mackay Society (Left Stirnerites) and the old NYC Libertarian Book Club (founded by comrades of Emma Goldman, some of whom I knew, & who are now all dead). I had a radio show on WBAI (Pacifica) for 18 years. I lectured all over Europe and East Europe in the 90s. I had a very nice time, thank you. But anarchism seems even farther off now than it looked in 1984, or indeed in 1958, when I first became an anarchist by reading George Harriman’s Krazy Kat. Well, being an existentialist means you never have to say you’re sorry.

In the last few years in anarchist circles there’s appeared a trend “back” to Stirner/Nietzsche Individualism—because after all, who can take revolutionary anarcho-communism or syndicalism seriously anymore? Since I’ve adhered to this Individualist position for decades (although tempered by admiration for Charles Fourier and certain “spiritual anarchists” like Gustave Landauer) I naturally find this trend agreeable.

“Green anarchists” & AntiCivilization Neo-primitivists seem (some of them) to be moving toward a new pole of attraction, nihilism. Perhaps neo-nihilism would serve as a better label, since this tendency is not simply replicating the nihilism of the Russian narodniks or the French attentatists of circa 1890 to 1912, however much the new nihilists look to the old ones as precursors. I share their critique—in fact I think I’ve been mirroring it to a large extent in this essay: creative despair, let’s call it. What I do not understand however is their proposal—if any. “What is to be done?” was originally a nihilist slogan, after all, before Lenin appropriated it. I presume that my option #1, passive escape, would not suit the agenda. As for Active Escapism, to use the suffix “ism” implies some form not only of ideology but also some action. What is the logical outcome of this train of thought?

As an animist I experience the world (outside Civilization) as essentially sentient. The death of God means the rebirth of the gods, as Nietzsche implied in his last “mad” letters from Turin— the resurrection of the great god PAN—chaos, Eros, Gaia, & Old Night, as Hesiod put it—Ontological anarchy, Desire, Life itself, & the Darkness of revolt & negation—all seem to me as real as they need to be.

I still adhere to a certain kind of spiritual anarchism—but only as heresy and paganism, not as orthodoxy and monotheism. I have great respect for Dorothy Day—her writing influenced me in the 60s—and Ivan Illich, whom I knew personally—but in the end I cannot deal with the cognitive dissonance between anarchism and the Pope! Nevertheless I can believe in the re-paganaziation of monotheism. I hold to this pagan tradition because I sense the universe as alive, not as “dead matter.” As a life-long psychedelicist I have always thought that matter & spirit are identical, and that this fact alone legitimizes what Theory calls “desire”.

From this p.o.v. the phrase “revolution of everyday life” still seems to have some validity—if only in terms of the second proposal, Active Escapism or the TAZ. As for the third possibility— Zarathustra’s Revenge—this seems like a possible path for the new nihilism, at least from a philosophical perspective. But since I am unable personally to advocate it, I leave the question open.

But here—I think—is the point at which I both meet with & diverge from the new nihilism. I too seem to believe that Predatory Capitalism has won and that no revolution is possible in the classical sense of that term. But somehow I can’t bring myself to be “against everything.” Within the Temporary Autonomous Zone there still seems to persist the possibility of “authentic life,” if only for a moment—and if this position amounts to mere Escapism, then let us become Houdini. The new surge of interest in Individualism is obviously a response to the Death of the Social. But does the new nihilism imply the death even of the individual and the “union of egoists” or Nietzschean free spirits? On my good days, I like to think not.

No matter which of the three paths one takes (or others I can’t yet imagine) it seems to me that the essential thing is not to collapse into mere apathy. Depression we may have to accept, impotent rage we may have to accept, revolutionary pessimism we may have to accept. But as e.e. cummings (anarchist poet) said, there is some shit we will not take, lest we simply become the enemy by default. Can’t go on, must go on. Cultivate rosebuds, even selfish pleasures, as long as a few birds & flowers still remain. Even love may not be impossible...

#hakim bey #Nihilism #t.a.z.#anarchism

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rpbetter · 4 years

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This blog tags for common, major triggers, but it is not for those easily triggered or particularly sensitive. By proceeding, you take responsibility for yourself...like a mature adult. I expect you to utilize blacklist, unfollow, and block. Tag format is simple, it is literally just the word in most cases, with “cw” and “tw” added to particularly common things. Example, a post containing a breakdown of forms of dubcon will be tagged #dubcon #dubious consent. If that was specifically of a sexual nature, since tumblr is unfriendly to using Not Safe For Work now, I will be using #notsafe for sexual topics. In the event that this needs to change, it will be posted about, the previous tag left intact, so that you may update your blacklist.

You are always welcome to send me an ask or private message requesting a particular trigger be tagged for you. I try to check blogs I see following, especially if I follow back, so that I can tag what you require. However, I’m a person, I’m an ND, ill, busy person though, I do make mistakes!

If you find yourself desirous of telling me to tag in a hateful way, don’t. You will not be responded to with an apology and kindness. Do not be rude, it’s uncalled for when informing someone of a problem or making a request.

I will run the blog largely on a queue, and will not be following many people back. This is not personal! I just like to try to provide content at many different times, have a life elsewhere, and I am so happy that you love your fandom, but it might not be something I’ve enough interest in to have on my dash.

Don’t tumblr message me. Use the inbox or submit.

Due to recent events, I am changing this rule. It’s hard for me to receive messages unexpectedly, and I hate to imply that I’ll be able to get to these quicker because it isn’t the truth. Quicker, better responses come from the inbox. However, there have been too many incidents lately in which people needed to speak privately and had to make that a request. If you’re having a problem and need to vent, request sensitive advice, etc.? It’s alright, go ahead and drop me a PM, y’all. I’ll get back to you as soon as I am able. Please, do not be angry with me if I respond to inbox things or my queue is running! You’re important to me, I just might not have the requisite social cognition and energy you deserve at that time.

Aggressive inbox messages will be responded to in kind. I don’t care if you are on anon or not, if you haven’t an ounce of polite communication skills, I won’t have them either. This is not a “we don’t publish anon hate” blog.

I highly encourage asks and submissions on any and all RP topics, and it’s perfectly alright to be salty as fuck in them, you can totally vent here, but don’t take out your frustration on me or be demanding of me. I am always happy to help with information, advice, or just a response to your venting-it’s important to know someone is listening. However, it may take me a few days to a week to get to you, be patient.

If you are going to vent, leave out usernames. This isn’t a callout or burnbook blog. It’s fine to state characters and fandoms, but if this becomes a problem, it’ll have to change. I don’t want this becoming a salt blog for one or two fandoms I very likely can’t even stand. Practice the fine art of alluding to things, its good experience for your writing! Besides, RPC problems are RPC problems, I promise. It might feel like it’s just your fandom, but there is something relatable in all corners.

I will not overly police comments. Keep the slurs and shit out of it, though. If there is an issue going on pertaining to a serious instance of hate speech, or behavior I, personally, deem as too inappropriate and/or immature to be taking place on my post, I will step in. Otherwise, I expect everyone to be adults in the comments and reblogs too. If you want to argue with each other, that’s your business. If you want to argue with me, I’m not sorry in advance.

Addition to the above: this is not a blog in which it will be tolerated that commentators or those submitting with the URLS are targeted for callouts, shaming, or other instances of bullying. No, I cannot make those people stop bothering you by blocking them, but the least I can do is address that by shutting down their access to this blog and it’s posts by blocking on the URLs I have for them. And I will. Fuck that “we can’t be responsible for” shit. It’s my blog, it’s my content I’m putting out there, I’m not going to just ignore shit like what went down over on COAR, thanks. Not. Cool.

This is definitely not a place for:

people who think giving muses labels, including top/bottom “dynamics,” is a good substitute for character traits, personality, and development

those with no reading comprehension skills

folks dependent upon aesthetics and aesthetics-based purple prose as filler for actual writing

anti-original character/just wants to fuck a FC or canon character club, get the fuck out immediately

y’all who see writing as an obstacle to getting down to action, be that smut, drama, or fight scenes...it’s literally a writing hobby

politics, any manner of phobe or ism, violent/non-inclusive feminists, purity/rpc/fandom/content police of any manner, and exactly any manner of racism, sexism, or religious intolerance - I give not a shit if it’s popular to hate the straights, for example, I neither believe in nor tolerate reactionary classifying of any group as blanket-statement evil

people who are going to tack onto my posts shit like, “it’s okay, OP, you can say x character.” Trust me, if I were talking about one character, I fucking would name drop them, don’t bring me into your fandom drama, I doubt I know or want to know who that anime guy is who looks like 12 other anime guys to me.

About Vespertine

You can call me that, Vespertine. I’d rather you didn’t go with Vesper, but as it is unfortunately so likely to happen, I won’t feed you to the dogs over it either. RPB Mun is also acceptable.

I’m alright with either she/her or he/him, they/them is also fine. Apparently, that was big enough clue-in for the poor reading comp crowd, so while I feel it is not of importance, I’m nonbinary, yes.

Late 30′s, chronically ill but still working adult with neurodivergence. I’m both busy and Busy, and always sick. This limits my brain power and ability to be here. I have an active RP blog that I won’t be sharing to keep responsible distance. That is always going to be my priority, it is my primary hobby.

Please, don’t tumblr message me totally random things if we don’t have that kind of relationship! I’m too ill and busy, and it really fucks my nerves to have a bunch of messages/have to suddenly interact socially with people. Don’t do it. Use my inbox, use the submit, comment on posts. I cannot do random messages of “hey” and so forth.

I only do written RP, don’t expect me to understand much of anything from tabletop. I’ve RPed for the last 23 years consistently, on every platform from AOL chats to forums to messengers and here. I also don’t do RP in discord, so I’m sorry, but I can’t advise you much on anything with a word count, except to stop it for serious RP. Other than that, I promise you that I’ve seen the trends, the drama, the fandoms. I can give a lot of advice and perspective on a wide range of topics, situations, and characters! When I don’t have a clue at all, I’ll try to do enough research to give you an answer.

Do I come off as a horrible, strict asshole? I do! I’m not going to say that I am just a shy bean who is more scared of you than you are me. I’m not. I’m honestly feral, but have common decency, compassion, and sense. All of which are lacking in the general RPC. So, if you can inbox/common/otherwise interact with anyone else on this site, you can totally handle me!

Honesty and openness are policies.

And in the spirit of that, I repeat; you can fucking do better, tumblr RPC!

#pinned post #tumblr rpc #rph #rp help #rp advice #rpbetter

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freedom-of-fanfic · 5 years

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one of the most popular argument from fandom police is that exposure oneself to problematic content will make you desensitized to atrocities and stop fighting against them when facing them irl. It baffled me. The argument doesn't only imply ppl can't think for themselves, it also says that we will only act on initial emotional impulses-disgust when seeing irl incest, for example - and nothing else, not logical thoughts, the law, their sense of duty, their empathy to the victims...

very true! but I think it makes sense when considered from a reactionary viewpoint.

why fandom policers seem to believe desensitization to horrible things prevents activism

in aggregate, communities that measure fandom content by purity culture standards & radfem/exclusionist-flavored ‘LGBT’ activism & try to control said fandom content by harassment, cyberbullying, & slander tend to behave in reactionary ways. that is: the majority of their actions are based on emotional responses to things rather than critical analysis & consideration.

the problem with emotions is: they’re not controllable enough nor long-lived enough to sustain long-term action.

So it makes sense that fandom policers fear anyone losing a sense of disgust/anger will lead to inaction when one considers that:

(a) the entire ‘anti’ movement is predicated on

believing they are objectively right/righteous (& everyone else is objectively wrong/evil); and

projecting their own behavior, feelings, and beliefs on everyone else*.

they don’t value or respect opposing worldviews, which they see as less moral than their own.

(b) fandom policers depend on their sense of disgust / revulsion to guide them regarding whether fictional content is ‘bad’ or not. Without that feeling, their ‘system’ of determining what is good or bad is too open to interpretation to be of much use.

(c) web 2.0/post-9-11 fear culture/24-7 news coverage has normalized outrage cycles & emotional reactions appearing to guide activism, i.e.

somebody well-known does something outraging & horrible;

news outlets saturate the media space w/coverage;

viral sharing social media is saturated with outraged reactions & calls for counteraction (which news outlets also cover ad nauseam);

activists who work in the field capitalize on the attention to solicit donations & help w/their cause. but before long--!

somebody well-known does something outraging & horrible (but totally different from the previous horrible thing);

news outlets drop the previous outrageous & horrible thing & saturate the media space w/coverage of the latest horrible thing;

etc etc, for eternity.

This discourages widespread awareness of long-term, non-outrage-induced activist efforts that continue after the news outlets have moved on, & keeps a constant cycle of new, MOST IMPORTANT~! causes that need your rage-induced attention & reaction.

(d) if an intense, negative emotional reaction to a thing is the only reason a person takes action against said thing, it’s true that they will only keep taking action against the thing while they still feel that way. maintaining the desire to act after desensitization sinks in will require either other feelings or other reasons for commitment to the cause to be invoked.

and finally:

(e) Inaction having been characterized as ‘just as bad as supporting [evil]’ by misapplying the truism that inaction helps perpetuate the status quo. (not all dilemmas/debates are a matter of right vs wrong, good vs evil, or tptb vs the oppressed, & it’s okay to not take action or have an opinion. feelings on ships/fanworks in fandom is one of these things, imho.)

so:

if a person polices fandom out of a kneejerk reaction of disgust & outrage towards a ship or fanwork, then their emotional reaction is what ensures they take action and maintaining that feeling of disgust&outrage is necessary to keep taking action.

if they don’t feel disgusted, they might lose interest in stopping it from existing - and inaction against evil is just as bad as doing evil.

Furthermore: because they do not credit other worldviews as existing/being valid, they believe - and are validated by news/social media outrage cycles in believing - that strongly negative, outraged emotional reactions to things motivates everyone else to take action just as it motivates themself.

so reactionaries wonder: if you get used to seeing something horrible & stop feeling upset/disgusted by it, how are you going to keep caring about fighting it? they wouldn’t keep caring after the emotional reaction has faded ... so how is it possible for you to do so?

and to be fair: not all fandom policers are purely reactionary - not by a long shot. and there’s nothing wrong with being motivated to act out of emotional reactions to things, either - even if you only donate to whatever vetted activist is at the top of your news feed because of the outrage cycle subject of the day, you’re still donating!

but the reality is: to fight something horrible, you have to understand it - even if it’s disgusting & enraging. & that means getting past how horrible it is to look it in the metaphorical face. if we didn’t have activists desensitizing themselves to horrible things so they can do something about them without destroying themselves or blundering horribly, most activist efforts would do more harm than good.

(and turning up their collective noses at anyone who doesn’t react with disgust to everything that upsets them is one reason why fandom policing efforts - even genuine ones - to ‘clean up fandom’ and ‘protect kids’ always miss their mark so hard.)

(*fandom policers frequently think the only reason other people do wrong/evil is because they’ve actively decided to be wrong/evil, or were tricked into it by other wrongdoers/evildoers.)

#weep woop its the fandom police #disgust as morality #fandom is not activism #but people sure are confused about that #why antis do the thing #web 2.0 is the worst thing to happen to fandom #antis are just leftist authoritarians #Anonymous

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homunculusrune · 4 years

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➳ Permanent Starter Call | Relationship ad

So this is specifically for isola muses who would like to have meaningful or long-term relationship/arrangements with Prisoner! It’s not necessarily a Necessary Permission just to interact with Prisoner- I’m pretty much okay with interacting with anybody! This is more of an interest call for plotting out an interaction if they haven’t met yet.

I’d ideally like to interact with a lot of people, because Prisoner at least at this point is pretty reactionary and survival oriented. He also has maybe a lot more issues than he’s had the time or environment to parse.

Prisoner is the nameless and voiceless (but highly opinionated) protagonist of the roguelike game Dead Cells, where he has been stuck in, more or less, a groundhog day loop in an ever-shifting setting populated with undead monsters. He’s been fighting for his survival, and dying a lot. His ethics are colorful in the name of survival, but his heart’s in the right place.

cause his head’s not, geddit? ha ha.

➳ CONTENT WARNINGS

Prisoner comes from a rather dark and upsetting game. The world as he knows is an island ruled by a tyrant king who held a bloody inquisition and genocide against his own people in an attempt to curb the rising tide of a mutagenic, zombifying disease known as the Malaise. While egregious examples will be tagged accordingly, Prisoner’s experience- and elements of his trauma- come laden heavily with themes of incarceration, execution (especially by hanging), torture, illness, body horror, blood, violence, and the desecration and burning of the dead.

If these are greatly uncomfortable for you, it is entirely up to you if you’d rather we don’t interact, or would like to interact but ask that I keep one or more topics away from how he interacts with your muse specifically, please communicate this.

➳ FRIENDS

This is easy to achieve but does not go very far. Prisoner is fairly wary of intentions for the environment he was used to living in, and, also, kinda losing his mind a bit in Spirale for there being more than seven living people who are not trying to kill or exploit him. Prisoner can be summarized as friendly but mistrustful so most people who hold a few conversations with him, or just stick around one way or another, will get on his good side, by virtue of watering the horrible wilting plant that is his sense that he’s a real person.

He may or may not unexpectedly drop some of said issues on you if you get into conversations with him, depending on his mood. The world he knows in general, and the specific path he’s beaten through it, are rather unkind and dark, so if you’d rather keep things light, this is just something to communicate on OOC. (see content warnings; while in-character these things might pop out of the blue, out of character is another story- I am more than happy to discuss and will pretty much always forewarn you if Prisoner’s mood is swinging for the morbid.)

He also has a soft spot towards small animals or children so if your muse is young, cute, or seems that way he will at least want you to be okay. (and, yes. this includes monsters. this is a guy who occasionally secures the company of large one-eyed carnivorous/bitey grubs... and puts little bows on them. His sense of cute is not everybody’s.)

Prisoner’s pretty willing to run small favors or hear out friends (is not opposed to quid pro quo arrangements either, even if they’re pretty loveless) but if the arrangement seems exploitative he may ditch on you. If you’re in trouble, he’s likely to help out, even if he doesn’t necessarily like or trust you that much- other survivors are rare where he comes from.

➳ SPECIAL SLOT: HOUSEMATES!

Prisoner is in House 112! Mostly, I’ve operated on the idea that he has come and gone at odd hours at best and not dropped off any personal belongings- thus making it maybe a little hard to tell if he’s there at all except that someone may have poked around or swiped food- but if your muse lives in the same house in Fibonacci Ward, please let me know anytime if you want to interact on that front!

➳ ALLIES / TRUSTED

More selective than casual friendship; this is a situation where Prisoner’s actual loyalty rears its head and it generally comes down to that he genuinely believes that you aren’t going to use him. Being used is a major concern / fear of his; he has pretty good reason to believe his entire existence was meant to be a means to an end for another person, and then personally spent an uncertain amount of time working for someone who proved to be using him for selfish gain and then abandon him in the lurch.

Other people who are synthetic beings, or who have been exploited/used somehow may be quicker to earn his trust or at least his compassion.

At this level you will almost definitely be privy to a lot of Prisoner’s exciting personal issues and he may even be willing to not pretend that he’s joking about them.

To have Prisoner’s loyalty means that he will not only work very hard or risk injury to help your muse, he may actually be willing to die for it- as he’s used to a respawn system much like Isola’s, he is potentially willing to use his own death as a means to an end.

➳ ENEMIES

This can range from the frivolous to genuinely serious. Prisoner is generally averse to authority, has a habit of viewing upsetting or macabre situations opportunistically, and can be plenty abrasive or flippant; if your muse takes things very seriously or is personally offended by his attitude I am absolutely game to play that out. It’s also worth noting as someone who lived much of his life at the hands and abuses of a criminal system, he is generally not a fan of persons of the law, though he can overcome that reflexive discomfort, his reflex is to be suspicious and wary first and foremost.

At the same time, he does hold himself to standards, and will also dislike or not get along with people who needlessly attack or bully innocent entities.

Generally, if Prisoner is attacked or feels threatened, he’ll throw down at least as long as it takes him to get out of the situation. That said, most people Prisoner considers enemies, he will maybe avoid or argue with, but is unlikely to sabotage or want them to die.

The exception is...

➳ HUNTED

In his home canon Prisoner maintains a great deal of animosity for the King of the Island, a person who served as his “original host” and who he was created.. for? out of? in a way he is not himself totally clear on.

It’s a nice summary to say that Prisoner spent most of the initial run of the game actively trying to hunt the King down and kill him, and is not deterred slightly by the revelation that the King is, at the time, in a catatonic state.

Once you really earn Prisoner’s hatred, he is a very hard enemy to shake, and he will not mince words. A really great way to get into this category is to repeat previous trauma- basically, trick, trap, or persuade Prisoner into an exploitative arrangement, especially if this involves somehow tampering with or causing him to second-guess his memories. The Collector went from ‘someone Prisoner is decently fond of, or at least considers a friend’ immediately to ‘bro I would stab you in the parking lot of a White Castle’ once Prisoner realized he was being exploited by Collector, even for an ostensibly noble goal (making a cure for the plague)- he has zero tolerance or patience for this.

#isola rp ad #isola plotting call #readmore #cause this post got long

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redandfranticfeelings · 5 years

Note

What did Mr.Enter do again, it's been so long since I watched a video form him

there’s a lot of criticism to be had about him as a reviewer (some i agree with and some i don’t) but i’m gonna focus on the stuff that’s actually, like, kind of important. most of the actual damaging shit he did as a reviewer- like wishing legitimate harm upon writers for writing a bad episode- is shit he does regret even if it was really unprofessional and inappropriate.

in general: any time he talks about politics, especially when it pertains to a group of which he isn’t a part (since he does conditionally show a lot of passion for issues of abuse and ableism), it comes across as ignorant at best and reactionary at worst.

probably the earliest sign that he wasn’t really worth a listen was how he praised the simpsons episode “homer badman” for addressing false rape accusations, which in itself isn’t bad, but the way he talks about the cause always seems to imply he considers false accusations more of a problem than actual rape which statistics have repeatedly disproven (the percentage of false accusations doesn’t even reach double digits). i believe he’s even stated he would rather be raped than be accused of rape.

around the start of the trump era he started demonstrating how he has no idea why people get outraged about politics. he finds no use in pointing out trump’s racism or sexism and acted like trump’s ability to appoint dangerous people to the administration wasn’t an issue. he referred to people pointing out the issues with trump as “fearmongering” by using cherry-picked examples of trump criticism. enter is a cis white guy, so telling people to “be calm” about a thoroughly racist, misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic, etc administation is horribly self-centered.

his “little clowns of happytown” video whined a lot about political correctness through a parody of the ad-friendly youtube bot and defended pewdiepie after all the shit he’s done (and he’s not even colleagues with pewdiepie or anything like a lot of other youtubers who have defended him, so it’s not like he has anything at stake by calling pewdiepie out). not as bad as some of the other shit but still a big red flag.

i haven’t watched his review of the goode family but i do know he takes a lot of time to complain about The Libz and i’ve heard he compares the left to fucking autism speaks which is a really fucking bad take.

eventually he just whined a whole lot about “everything being offensive” where he falls for shit like that manufactured rudolph controversy (which is ironic bc he complained about liberal media but then falls for an issue that was blown up just to stir outrage about “PC culture” from a few random tweets) and complains about people not forgiving kevin hart, asking why he should even apologize if that’s the case, which is again, super selfish especially considering he praised a bojack horseman episode that debunked that very idea.

looking through those journals should give a fair idea of how eye-rollingly centrist he is to the point of not really being centrist, because i have never seen him extensively complain about conservatives like he has liberals. this political turn seems largely new since he’s criticized cartoons for, say, promoting potentially homophobic or transphobic ideas before. but it’s rlly uncomfortable to watch him now bc of how he shoehorns this crypto-conservatism into his reviews.

#answers #mrenter #i dont think anyone cares if i tag that right?#its not blind hate its legit criticism #Anonymous

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manticoreimaginary · 6 years

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The Rhetoric Tricks, Traps, and Tactics of White Nationalism

Common rhetoric tactics:

“SJW”s / Feminism

appeal to the status quo/appeal to law and order- “Azov is a volunteer police.” / “The Charlottesville rally had a permit.” / “Gay culture is destroying our freedom of religion.”

Claiming the person being appealed to is in some form of risk and must defend/join the neo-nazi speaker for their self-defense from an enemy (usually “SJWs”)

[__] are coming to take your [__]

Red Herring- “communism killed 100 million people”/ “antifa did [__]” derailment to drown out any discussion of their acts of murder and violence and control the conversation to talk about and highlight “other” violence

“Lügenpresse” (lying press)- [__]source of information is lying, this one is as old as Joseph Goebbels the Nazi Minister of Propaganda

straw man- an intentionally misrepresented proposition that is set up because it is easier to defeat than an opponent’s real argument

antifa and opposing fascism as evil, “antifascists are the real fascists!”

Tu Quoque- “Antifa is also violent!” / “If you don’t let us say [__] then you’re also killing free speech”

Misleading statistics- usually racial statistics from debunked studies done 80 years ago, cherry picked crime data

Bogus science mixed with taking real science out of context- Darwinism, biological determinism, race realism, phrenology, and racially biased IQ

False Cause- wrongfully attributing something as the cause, “You talking about [__] only causes them to be stronger!” / “Attacking Nazis is what makes people be Nazis!” / “This violence is merely a response to PC cultural neo-marxism.”

Gish Gallop- time wasting strategy to drown the opponent in mass ive waves of argumentative claims (see above)

Non Sequitur- a conclusion that does not follow from the statements that lead to it

Fallacy of Refication- “National Socialist, ‘socialist’ means they were Left wing!”

Loaded Question- contains a presupposition or unproven assumption that can make it difficult to give an answer that doesn’t support the questioners premise “You always support violence?” / “So you hate Free Speech?”

No True Scotsman- claiming any related murders, stabbings, beatings, or other violence perpetrated by white supremacists doesn’t apply as they are not “truly” part of the white nationalist movement see: Anders Breivik, Alex Fields, Samuel Woodward, Brandon Russell

Immigration fearmongering, Islamophobia, race baiting

“White Genocide” / “Great Replacement” / “Whites have a right to exist” / “Faith Folk Family” / “ We must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children.” / “Asia for the Asians, Africa for the Africans, White nations for White people.”

“Political Correctness” and "thought police"- often used to silence an opponent or draw unwitting others to their defense, “This is just PC bullshit” / “De-platforming nazis is Thought Policing” / “Free marketplace of ideas”

“Post-Modernism” / “Cultural Marxism”- popular boogeymen terms that don’t really have substance or clear meaning and are easy to apply to anyone and anything they don’t like

“Diversity Quotas”- fear mongering appeal towards white men, saying that their jobs/opportunities/livelihoods are being “stolen” and given to those less worthy (meaning brown people and women)

“Frankfurt School”- commonly cited as part of antisemitic neo-Nazi conspiracies about shadowy powers controlling the world via secret elite intellectuals, see also “Deep State”, “Globalists”, “New World Order” type conspiracies. It’s all just new more appealing ways to say “Jews”.

Argumentum Ad Speculum- hypothetical examples that are factually incorrect are used to prop up the incorrect assumption. Invocations about how not allowing hate speech will lead to horrible outcomes usually relies on this.

Your silence against white supremacy in it’s myriad forms supports rising violent reactionary movements.

#racism #white supermacists #islamaphobia #anti semitism #nazi punks fuck off

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toycarousel · 5 years

Note

Did ya see the Steven universe commercial that partnered with dove?

Oh, gosh, I haven’t watched them yet, but I will. Grooooooooaaaaannnnn though, dove, you gotta stop trying to be fake-woke, we all know you’re a massive corporation that doesn’t actually care, because corporations aren’t designed to be concerned with anything but maximizing profits. :’D (Like, I’m sure some random, individual ppl working for dove do care, but CEOs jobs’ are just: “What will make us the most money in this situation?”)

Reminds me of the “woke” gillette ad. I’m just tired. Like, it’s (I guess) a relief that corporations aren’t spreading horrible propaganda against marginalized ppl -- but they’re still just using us all for money, I mean, that’s what corporations are for, you know? And in response to them, a lot of other businesses and corporations actually are taking the brutal conservative route in order to maximize online outrage on both “progressive liberal” sides and sleazy alt-right and/or reactionary sides.

Like, I srsly love SU as a show, and I get why they’d need to do this, it’s just a little depressing that this is the way marketing goes now. Online brands have turned their consumers into free advertising.

#:')#kill capitalism with molotov cocktails #and left unity #ask to tag #Anonymous

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wenevergotusedtoegypt · 6 years

Note

What's your opinion on the horrible level of secular education in yeshivas right now and what's going on with Board of Education investigating the yeshiva curriculum? i want my kids to be proud of being jewish but i want them to be smart as well. I went to both public school and yeshiva. i loved both but public school education was undeniably better and prepared me for life, which sucks because i feel yeshivas are doing such a disservice by not raising the bar.

So a few thoughts on this -

1. Don’t make the mistake of equating “not highly educated in secular subjects” with “not smart.” There are brilliant people who haven’t spent significant time studying X subject. That doesn’t reduce their intelligence, just their level of knowledge in that area. And studying things like, say, Gemara, can really hone a person’s ability to think, reason, and problem-solve, perhaps even in ways that many public school students are less able to do based on the way they are taught. This is perhaps just semantics - maybe “smart” was just a poor choice of words and you meant something else - but I do think it’s an important point in the larger discussion.

2. That said, I do think it’s important for kids to have solid skills in reading, writing, math, etc. and there are yeshivos that fail at that. It’s a very unfortunate undervaluing of basic skills that not only would help those kids in making a living and functioning within society, but would also assist in strengthening their Torah learning. It’s sad that there’s been this reactionary movement against subjects that in past times, say the times of the Rambam, would have been recognized as not only good, but indeed necessary, to proper Torah scholarship. My husband and I agree about this and will be taking it into account accordingly when selecting schools for our IY”H future children.

3. That said, I think it’s a huge mistake on multiple levels to involve the government in trying to force curriculum standards on those schools that a subpar in this area. Governments throughout the ages have attempted to impose standards (reasonable or, more often, otherwise) on Jewish schools (or to close down Jewish schools altogether), and they’ve been resisted every time - even under totalitarian regimes, at great risk to their very lives. The democratic U.S. government isn’t going to be the one that succeeds in forcing people to educate their children in a way they don’t feel is in line with their values. All they’ll do is feed into the narrative of the secular government as anti-Jewish enemy, making these communities only less and less open to considering adding more secular studies. The activists who have been pushing for government involvement in this area mean well, but nothing good is going to come of it, and a lot of bad may very well result. The only way to create change is to bring an attitude shift from within, which is something that isn’t going to happen overnight. Those activists are concerned about the kids in school now, so they want something to happen now (an understandable, even if unrealistic, sentiment), and they see government action as the solution. But it’s just not going to work.

#anon #replies

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mitigatedchaos · 6 years

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@philippesaner (rambling follows)

That sounds really dumb to me.

I’m not sure exactly what you mean by “male gender awakening”, but it’s anything like gamergate or Jordan Peterson then I want no part of it.

Also, left-wing transgression is often very real. Gay people and trans people didn’t just suddenly become acceptable for no reason; they had to very publicly break the “rules” just to get halfway there.

I was swaggering a bit because I have a negative amount of respect for Left and Liberal underdog obsession (including self-identification as underdog), which has lead to things such as backing a patriarchal foreign religion doing things that they’d never accept from Christians because of what ethnicity practices it (including shutting down critics of the same ethnicity), or the horrible mangling of “intersectionality” to turn it into effectively a combo bonus multiplier for “oppressed categories” and so on.

It’s fair to argue “being trans under recent conditions is actually transgressive (against established norms),” but what I’m really taking issue with is adopting the aesthetics of transgression as good in itself, rather than instrumental in value. Not shock as a tactic, but shock as an inherently praiseworthy virtue.

A kind of “look at us, we’re crude, we’re provocative, we’re the future!” which, if it were coming from 10 years later and from the other side, would end with “LOL TRIGGERED SNOWFLAEKS?”

And that’s part of what I meant by encountering real shocks. Because you can copy transgressiveness and offending people on purpose as a tactic, and when someone from the outside does, it’s fairly obvious that transgression is not inherently virtuous. But the response has been to label such things “reactionary” and implicitly argue that they don’t count because they’re “going backwards.”

(We’ve also seen Communist governments label themselves as “revolutionary” long after The Revolution is over.)

Meanwhile, Multinational corporations were running ads from a cultural Liberal issue perspective during the Super Bowl. That’s a reflection of real establishment power. ...just like the Duluth Model is a reflection of real establishment power.

And it irritates me when people pretend to be power-starved rebels when they aren’t.

(I would argue that Trans as A Thing has not yet been fully absorbed into the Establishment memeplex and remains a frontier. Homosexuality, too, but to a lesser degree. However, just because something’s part of the Establishment doesn’t mean that it’s bad. The idea of human rights is inconsistent, but we’re probably all mostly better off that it’s part of the dominant ideology.)

As for the male gender awakening, it’s bigger and more complex than GG and The Petersonians.

You know those trap jokes, and how there’s argument over whether they’re offensive?

They are increasingly positive, and about how “traps” are desirable.

That’s a real flip over ten or twenty years ago, from what I can tell.

When Feminism came into being, you had women viewing themselves as a collective class. That class logic is the real underpinning of Feminism, and helps to bring about and organize collective action due to its internalization as part of self-identity.

What the male gender awakening is really about is men gaining collective consciousness of their gender as a class, internalizing it, then acting collectively to redefine their role as men in society.

And that’s going to piss a lot of people off. You included, probably.

#politics #gendpol #uncharitable #rambling

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sinrau · 4 years

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On Friday, Donald Trump and his wife Melania attended an early Independence Day celebration held at Mount Rushmore.

This article first appeared on Salon.

There were fireworks, a military flyover, and “patriotic” songs such as “The Star-Spangled Banner”.

The entire spectacle embodied the worst kind of superficial juvenile patriotism.

More than 130,000 Americans are dead from the coronavirus pandemic. The country teeters on the edge of a second Great Depression. A neofascist regime rules in Washington. Donald Trump is in thrall to Vladimir Putin and Russia and in doing so actively betrays the United States and the American people.

Music and fireworks and loud planes are distractions for a country facing an existential crisis.

Donald Trump’s early July 4th celebration had little to do with uniting America in a time of trouble and pain. Instead the gathering at Mount Rushmore was just a Trump campaign rally in disguise where the Great Leader spat out his usual themes of racism, neofascism, authoritarianism, ignorance, violence, Orwellian doublespeak and lies, Christian fascism, white identity politics, and other right-wing dreck to his red hat MAGA political cult members.

Throughout his time in office, Donald Trump has made it clear through his words and deeds that be views his personal interests to be the same as the nation’s.

Such thinking is like that of King George III and the other despots who the founders rejected with the Declaration of Independence, the Revolutionary War and the United States Constitution.

In the end, because he is a malignant narcissist, Donald Trump thought that all the pageantry was to honor him and not the country’s birthday.

Donald Trump’s re-election campaign advisers have suggested, apparently not facetiously, that they want his face added to Mount Rushmore. They are enabling his delusions of grandeur.

History sometimes has a dark sense of irony and coincidence all its own.

Because he does not read and is proudly ignorant, Donald Trump most certainly does not know that “The Star-Spangled Banner” channels his white supremacist and racist values. If Trump knew such a thing, he would likely love the song even more.

Francis Scott Key’s anthem has a third verse which is rarely sung, after the ones we have all heard before sporting events and on other occasions.

The lyrics are:

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore, That the havoc of war and the battle’s confusion A home and a Country should leave us no more? Their blood has wash’d out their foul footstep’s pollution. No refuge could save the hireling and slave From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave, And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave

O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

As many historians have documented, “hireling and slave” refers to self-manumitted Black people (that is, slaves who freed themselves) who served with the British military, fighting to liberate other enslaved Black people in America.

In the third verse of “The Star-Spangled Banner,” Key is celebrating the Colonial Marines who were burned alive or drowned in Baltimore Harbor.

Trump would find much to admire about Key, who owned Black human property during the time he wrote “The Star-Spangled Banner” and was an enthusiastic defender of white-on-Black chattel slavery.

Like Donald Trump, Key was wealthy. He was also a friend and adviser to Donald Trump’s favorite president, Andrew Jackson, who was not merely a white supremacist but literally a slave driver. Jackson also ordered that Native Americans be expelled from their home regions to endure a death march later known as the Trail of Tears. While serving as a general prior to being president, Andrew Jackson led a military campaign against the Seminole nation and the free communities established by self-manumitted Black people in Florida.

The racism and white supremacy embedded in “The Star-Spangled Banner” provide a soundtrack for Donald Trump and today’s Republican Party in other ways as well.

Donald Trump leads a movement that is waging a counterrevolution against the civil and human rights of Black and brown people in the United States and around the world.

To maintain and keep power, Trump and the Republicans have embraced the white supremacist ideology, politics and symbols of the Confederacy. This began in the 1960s with a backlash against the civil rights movement, first with 1964 Republican nominee Barry Goldwater and then with Richard Nixon’s “Southern strategy,” meant to appeal to white racists uncomfortable with the civil rights movement. More than five decades later, right-wing appeals to racism and white supremacy are in some ways less restrained with the rise of Trumpism.

As part of that strategy Donald Trump and his party are defending the legacy of the Confederacy and its statues and other monuments to white supremacist terrorism.

Trump recently issued an executive order proclaiming any person who dares to “vandalize” American statues, monuments or memorials can be charged with a federal crime and imprisoned for up to 10 years.

Trump is also refusing to change the names of military bases that bear the names of treasonous Confederate military leaders. He has even threatened to veto the military’s 2021 budget if such changes are made.

Here are the president’s own words from his failed “comeback” rally in Tulsa:

The unhinged left-wing mob is trying to vandalize our history, desecrate our monuments, our beautiful monuments, tear down our statues, and punish, cancel and persecute anyone who does not conform their demands for absolute and total control. We’re not conforming…. This cruel campaign of censorship and exclusion violates everything we hold dear as Americans. They want to demolish our heritage so they can impose a new oppressive regime in its place.

The repeated use of “our” is a signal to the fact that Trump views white America as his tribe. Nonwhites are explicitly and implicitly not welcome. In essence, Trump behaves as though he is only beholden to those white people — his MAGA cultists and “real Americans” — who vote for him.

Trump has retweeted and shared videos of his supporters yelling “white power!” and of white people brandishing weapons at Black Lives Matter and other human rights protesters. In the last few weeks Trump has also shared videos on Twitter of Black people attacking white people. Of course, he provides no context for the latter.

The goal here is twofold. First, to mobilize his voters by exciting decades-old or centuries-old white nightmares of a “race war” and possible Black “domination” over white people. Second, to encourage acts of political violence by his right-wing followers against his and their “enemies.”

Writing in the Washington Post, Greg Sargent explains this:

With nearly 125,000 Americans dead and cases spiking again from a pandemic that Trump horribly mismanaged, and amid the most pronounced civil upheaval in a half century, Trump’s propagandists want to convert disorder to his advantage.

That’s obvious enough. But the true nature of it is often shrouded in euphemisms — Trump is “stoking division,” or “throwing a match on gasoline,” or some such phrase, which implies Trump is a passive bystander to societal conflicts that he’s merely cheering on for cynical purposes.

It’s much worse than that. Trump and his propagandists are actively trying to engineer violent civil conflict, by signaling to white Americans that they are under siege in a race war that they’re losing.

The rub is that this signaling requires actually saying this in one form or another. And that forces Trump and his propagandists into a position where they must be cagey about his actual intended meanings when he does things like tweet out supporters yelling “white power.”

Trump and his propagandists want a lot of white Americans to think they need to take sides in a race war.

In total, Trump and the Republican Party’s dedication to causing pain and harm to nonwhite people is not collateral damage or coincidence: Such outcomes are integral to permanently maintaining society-wide white privilege and white power. This embrace of racism is so extreme that social scientists have shown that Trump supporters and other white conservatives would rather America be an authoritarian society than live in a democracy where they would have to share power with nonwhites.

The Confederacy shared such goals as well. In his infamous Cornerstone Speech in March 1861, shortly before the first battles of the Civil War, Confederate Vice President Alexander Stephens said:

Our new government is founded upon exactly the opposite idea; its foundations are laid, its corner-stone rests, upon the great truth that the negro is not equal to the white man; that slavery subordination to the superior race is his natural and normal condition. This, our new government, is the first, in the history of the world, based upon this great physical, philosophical, and moral truth.

From the founding to the present there is a terrible reservoir of racism and white supremacy that now provides the raw energy and fuel for Trumpism and the Republican Party in post-civil rights America.

America will need another revolution and founding to fulfill its hopeful potential as a true “we the people” multiracial democracy. Donald Trump and his movement of racist reactionaries stand against such progress and are actively working to send America back to a time when white men’s rule was (at least in their minds) uncontested, universal and eternal as the natural order of things in America and around the world.

On this Fourth of July weekend Donald Trump is grandly reminding the world that patriotism is the last refuge of traitors and scoundrels. Trump may wrap himself in the American flag and other vestments of “patriotism,” but his heart and mind are truly of the antebellum South and Jim and Jane Crow America. Trump claims to be a greater president than Abraham Lincoln. Trump in his delusions believes he is as great as George Washington. But Donald Trump is really a 21st-century Jefferson Davis, president of the treasonous Confederacy. May he be remembered in the same ignominious fashion.

#IFTTT #WordPress

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braindamageforbeginners · 7 years

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Day 36, Radiation 24, Serum Infusion 5 (sort of)

I realize that I tend to be discursive and verbose (in writing, anyway, I’m a surprisingly quiet person in real life); HOWEVER, dear reader, if the potential walls of text seem intimidating, let me just say, I cover a helluva lot of ground in this one. Benchmarks shall be reached; insights had; exhilarating heights and terrifying lows reached. Or, yesterday marked an important date, I had some critical insights to surviving deadly diseases (

So; yesterday marked the final initial serum infusion (I know that sounds like I’m a demented time traveler; hang with me). The “initial” treatment period for GBM - usually agreed as the “critical” treatment period - is a six-week course of 42 days of chemotherapy, 30 radiation doses (you get weekends off), and, in my case, five injections of Abraham Erskine’s Special Sauce. This is followed by a 20-30 day vacation - of sorts, followed by a year of on-again-off-again chemo (and, in my case, added bacon bits to Dr. Erskine’s elixer). That’s if everything goes well. If the radiotherapy (which is the very best that every single physician I consulted with recommended) isn’t as effective as predicted/hoped; you can start planning on what requests you’ll make for Tom Petty and Whitney Houston. I mean, there are some things they can do to forestall the disease, manage symptoms, etc. but that’s pretty the cancellation notice on a TV series you were watching. Again, I am amazingly horrified, upset, and angry that my life expectancy and potential is dependent upon which artificial rogue proton hit which carbon ring in an alien invader in my brain. And I’m going to be getting sentenced (as it were), in a month, and a helluva lot will be due to random chance. And healthy people would see this whole thing that the end is in sight, and thus begins a new stage of life (here’s a teachable moment, healthy folks; if you have a friend with a progressive disease, the stages are that they get worse until they die; new stage of life is that they get to skip some stages). So, yeah, after a year of awful news, it feels rather less that the parole board is convening, and much more that the Roulette Wheel is spinning. And I suppose the secret to doing this thing with grace and courage (which, again, I have no intention of doing; I was born a miserable misanthrope) is figuring out how to maximize those spins before the cashier collects. But, that is still a full month off, there are still positive (and negative) possibilities in play, and we shall leave the dark Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come for the rest of the post in favor of me (I suppose I’d be the Ghost of Christmas That one Time Dad Accidentally Misplaced and Mislabeled Everyone’s Gifts, So the Day Ended in a Really Stupid Series of Arguments)(I mean, I love the Christmas Carol, but I think we can all agree that I’m much more in the vein of idiotic-yet-funny family history stories we use to scare Grandma into silence)(Again, ladies, I am single).

So, we start events bright and early yesterday with me getting my blood drawn. Which always sucks, but I have learned a few tricks over the years (holding the phlebotomist’s family hostage in case they have to stab you more than three times isn’t as effective as you’d think). I have really hard-to-find veins; they’re small, you can’t see them, and they clench up and hide well after a bad attempt. But, I now have the patter down to a fine art, and most decent nurses and phlebotomists can do it by the second try (the record number of attempts, for anyone keeping score, was an MRI tech in NoCal - this was back in the days when techs were allowed to inject dyes into patients on their own; the rules have since changed). The vampire tech in question got me on the first time, and, then installing the IV, accidentally spritzed me with my own life essence. In all fairness, I’ve suffered worse the last time I spilled a drink, in terms of liquid exposure. And, because it’s me, it’s not even the first or second time I’ve been drenched in my own blood - it might be the third or fourth time, I’d have go back and tally them up (and, although “drench” is far too strong a verb in this instance, it wasn’t strong enough to capture the previous occasions)(I desperately wish I was making this up). Now, this wasn’t terribly painful, or, as it turns out, even very inconvenient - thankfully, there’s some mega-methanol fabric cleaner on hand (I don’t know why this surprised me; I’ve had a semi-permanent place in the hospital system since before I could vote) - which is fortunate, because the constabulary takes a dim view of grown men with blood stains on their crotches (that wasn’t some sort of design on my part, it was just a weird - albeit amusing - outcome of the angles and pressures involved. Anyway, after securing the IV in place, and making me presentable for a court appearance, the Vampire Tech (and this isn’t a slam on her, or anything; it’s just that the job of drawing blood and installing IVs is done by - according to my count - nurses, phlebotomists, technicians, nurses in training, training phlebotomist technicians - you get the idea; there’s 45 possible job titles for the person sticking me with an 18 gage needle)(crucial tidbit for future patients; 20-22 gage needles are about the smallest they’ll use on an adult, and, if you have a documented history of hard-to-find veins, you might want to consider asking for one of those) apologized to me for the mishap; I reciprocated, and she mentioned that she’d used a slightly smaller needle than she thought and moved a little faster, based on my description. She then mentioned - and I do hope you are sitting - that I have really, really big veins, they’re just a bit hard to find.

THE BETRAYAL. ALL IS LIES. You have to understand, folks, I’ve been told that I have small, hard-to-find, hard-to-poke veins, and, all this time, I have mid-grade kitchen pipes. I have to believe - because I’ve had my blood drawn more often than Lance Armstrong in the last sixteen years - that someone would’ve mentioned that my veins are fine, they’re just invisible and not where you expect them, and I forgot. That would be bad, and upsetting, but I would’ve liked to have thought that someone would’ve noticed and mentioned it a second or third time. Of course, I also did down two liters of water a half-hour before the blood draw, so it’s possible my venous system is more aggressively reactionary than Southern politics (drinking a lot of water right before a blood draw a well-known, very effective way to make the phlebotomist’s job easier), and this poor woman underestimated.

So, fast-forward 1400 years to me, in the chemo seat (which is supposed to be comfortable, but it’s amazing how unpleasant impersonal barcaloungers are when you have a tube in your arm, and you daren’t jiggle it lest you get billed for someone’s dry-cleaning bill), getting grilled by Research Coordinator, about assorted side-effects (that’s what they’re testing me for, remember), and he mentions that I’ve already reached the maximum recommended dose and tolerated it well, so I’m probably at my maximal side effects, super-soldier wise. Which makes me feel good, because, even though my arm and shoulder hurt like a sumbitch the next day and I have vague flu-like symptoms, if this is as bad as it gets, experimental drug-wise, it’s pretty tolerable (I mean, depending on how things shake-out, if this is a bimonthly, standard dose, I’ll ask them about some sort of stronger pain-killer or something, because this is extremely unpleasant, but, if this is the price of another decade or two, it’s doable)(even with horrible, horrible Gatorade). Which made me feel all Captain American-y for a brief moment and shine a bit of hope on the darkness. Research Coordinator also mentioned that, even though you only get one radiation treatment per lifetime, if I beat this thing the first time and it comes back, he and the Warlocks are already working on potential treatment plans, trials, and virgin sacrifices to keep me alive. Folks, I��m going to use some strong language here, but, I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, this is why, if you have a serious illness, do not fuck around with the folks at the local health-mart; go directly to the best. I’m still scared as hell that the radiation won’t take hold and/or this tumor will kill me, but I do feel like, if I can beat this one, I might have something like a normal life expectancy. That might just be the bargaining part stage of grief, though, and it does kind of require me to survive the next several months, which is far from guaranteed. to say the least. HOWEVER, Research Coordinator did assure me that, win, lose, or draw, I’d be getting a few weeks off from Gatorade (I’ll discuss this in further detail later, because it’s not exactly what it sounds like). My major complaint about that interaction is that they skimped on the budget and didn’t get Stanley Tucci to do the interview.

I also had a fascinating conversation with a chemo nurse who was double checking assorted side-effects, prescriptions, patient history, what-have-you. The following conversation has been condensed and slightly edited. NURSE: So, no nausea or vomiting? SELF: Not yet. NURSE: And you’re still on zofran? SELF: Uh, yeah, although i was queasy after the second infusion, so Research Coordinator suggested I double the dosage. But that’s in all the history, and it’s factored in to all of my prescriptions and stuff, as far as I can tell. NURSE (suspiciously): And you’ve never skipped a dose or cut back? SELF: Ma’am, it makes physically bearable and keeps me from puking. Why would I feel the need to experiment with that? NURSE: Oh, you’d be surprised. SELF: Look, if I get all my dreams and die at age 90 in excellent health; I want to be buried with a full bottle of zofran in case I need it.

Eventually, I did get to make it to another part of Socal, because Mother Dearest and the dog decided to visit me. Again, I’m going to be vague in an attempt to preserve some sort of anonymity (if not on my part, at least my dog’s); but we were able to coordinate this because I found a pet-friendly hotel in a part of town half-way between home and the hospital - as opposed to the really nice, but really expensive resort town. I’m now ready to call it quits with the resort area - it was quieter, friendlier, cheaper, and more personal. There’s less to do there, but people actually talked to me (or they talked to my dog, which I think is close enough). Everyone I talked to at this neighborhood was friendly - like, the meanest response of the night is from me, when a baker came out from behind the counter to hug my dog and I kind of winced, because that doesn’t seem very hygienic. But the croissants were amazing (like, worth dog-germ-risk to a technically-immunocompromised person amazing). And I got to celebrate the serum-sorta-completion-almost date the way American Jesus intended: with steak tartare, near-raw burgers, (it could be laden with tuberculosis, but, screw it, I got zofran, I’m not gonna puke), and double-helpings of beer (and, to those of you who don’t know me, few people like microbrew more than I do). It was a delightsomeful, memorable evening. I’m sure she meant it as a compliment, but Mother Dearest expressed far more wit in a single observation than the entire Trump administration: “You’ve become a much more interesting diner since you gave up that heart-health thing.”

And I sort-of slept. Maybe. A few hours. I will say this about the horrible super-soldier serum; it does produce the most amazingly life-like dreams I’ve ever experienced. Yes, I know they’re not technically hallucinations, but, you people didn’t attend the Super Bowl last night. Admittedly, that’s s a really weird, specific, helluva strange object for my focus (I give less thought to the NFL than I do to alfalfa profit margins)(not that either takes up much brain space). It felt like I was there, just like the last hyper-realistic post-injection dream. Which was weird and cool, and, certainly one of the more intriguing side-effects. Which led to a nastier, far-too-frequent side-effect; my arm feeling like it was trying to disattach itself from my frame. Fortunately, after last time, I knew exactly what to; go directly to Tylenol and Gatorade, which made things tolerable. Or as tolerable as Gatorade-based mornings can be. It did occur to me that, if I can’t be Captain America, maybe my right arm can grow and mutate and turn into some sort of really cool/scary demon-hand, like Hellboy. Which would enable me to punch through the flimsy walls of this universe to Hell itself, so that I could track down the inventor of Gatorade, and give him a well-earned thrashing (I know I’m an agnostic, but one thing I am absolutely theologically certain of; the creator of Gatorade is in Hell).

And, as I was musing - like you do, when you’re waiting for superpowers - I recalled the nurse saying that people just experiment and go off zofran (again, kids, if Santa Claus ever brings you zofran, you write a thank-you note immediately). This kind of coincided with another revelation, and I do apologize if it’ll take some time to connect the two, because they make a very important point for everyone planning on surviving cancer. I was packing up the dog’s stuff (specifically, his bowl and bag of food), and thought I’d just pour the leftover food into the bag on the porch/parking-lot area - food’s gonna spill, after all; if it happens out there, some lucky squirrel can deal with it. Mom immediately stopped me so that she could do the exact same thing in the sink area. Depositing dog food all over the sink, and turning a two-minute task into a five-minute cleaning job; without any apparent gain apart from cleaning kibble out of the sink. Now, because it’s Mother Dearest, I’m sure I’ll get some note about how I’m wrong and efficiency and cleanliness are overrated. What occurred to me is that it was a minor case of someone exercising some form of agency merely because they could.

And I get that; I really do. I organize my bookshelves, keep a highly regimented gym schedule, etc. And it suddenly occurred to me, based on this thought (and the chemo nurse’s statement that people stop taking zofran just because), there has to be a chunk of the populace that goes off doctor’s orders or refuses care or whatever for a variety of reasons. That’s all old news; I was an EMT, I’ve seen stupid shit you couldn’t even begin to believe. BUT, the heartening part of it - for me, anyway - is that I have, since Day 1 (since before then, actually), religiously followed doctor’s orders and suggestions (for the most part; I still shave, eat raw foods, and train in the gym; but I’ve never missed an appointment, prescription, dosage, or medical exam, and I’ve never lied to my physicians when questioned). Now, I realize that I have a dangerous disease that isn’t well-understood or have a terribly predictable outcome; but, it is worth noting that, every time I tell some medical professional I’ve lived with this disease (or chronic brain tumors, anyway) for 16 years, I get the exact same reaction as if I’d told them I went to school with Archimedes. I am, apparently, in the world of cancer, patients, nigh-vampire-unkillable. Which is pretty cool and makes me feel good, but, for everyone who wants to learn that secret, well, it’s pretty simple.

You want to go to the very best doctors. You want to figure out the best treatment plan for you; the one that offers the most chance of success. HOWEVER, once you have those things; you follow the rules and stick to the treatment plan like your life depends on it, because it does. I have no idea whether this is going to work, or what my life expectancy will be, but I am near-certain that if I decided to screw around with things, I will have a very grim future.

In figuring out an appropriate ending metaphor for all of this - and the importance of sticking to the medical plan in a world filled with changing variables and crises - I hit upon China Mieville’s book, “Kraken.” It’s an odd urban fantasy that prominently features a cult that worships giant squid as deities (it’s not the dumbest religion I’ve ever heard of). However, there is a minor plot point about the cult’s version of chess - “Kraken Chess,” which is just like our chess, except it features a piece called the Kraken (because of course it does). The Kraken piece is the most powerful piece on the board, because it can - like the queen - move any number of squares in any direction; however, the Kraken piece can also not move at all. It just forfeits a turn.

Folks, as you navigate a dangerous disease, there will be many, many periods where you don’t see any real results, there is no end in sight (or, as the case may be, the visible ends tend to look scary). I will work tirelessly to figure out some sort of coping strategy for all that - believe me, a large part of my life is centered on that, right now. All I can say is, don’t exert agency when none is needed, especially if that comes in the form of skipping your zofran. Sometimes, you must be the kraken; silent, beaked, still, and waiting for the opportunity to kill Sam Worthington.

I mean, uh, take your meds, follow the doctor’s directions, and don’t miss your appointments.

At the moment, I’m back home, waiting for my next appointment (it’s in a few hours);everything’s as close to normal as it can be. I’ve finished up all my administrative health lackey duties, so all bills that can be paid, prescriptions that can be renewed, appointments that can be made, etc. have been scheduled, and I can’t do anything for a few hours. Which is almost a relaxing feeling. I might go sit in the yard with a book and try and get in touch with my inner squid. Sometimes that’s the best you can do.

Folks, I do apologize if that was a bit lengthy and choppy; I had to write it exceedingly fast because I took a day off and there was a lot to attend to while I wrote. So, sorry if it’s a little disjarring; I can do better than that, I just didn’t have the time (and parts of it were written while I was still a little loopy from Captain America serum). The good news - sort of - is that there’s still a lot of things on the cutting-room floor that I’ll be revisiting in short-order. You’d best believe I’m going to revisit that kraken metaphor very soon, I have dark plans for the importance of vomiting on people (sort of), and why we, as a species, might be okay in the end.

#Cancer #brain tumor

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theseventhhex · 5 years

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Ceremony Interview

Ceremony

Photo by Rick Rodney

Ceremony make their Relapse Records debut with their highly ambitious new album, ‘In the Spirit World Now’. The album sees Ceremony at the height of their creative output, as the always-evolving Rohnert Park quintet take various influences from post punk and rock to create one of the summer's most compelling and infectious records. ‘In the Spirit World Now’ is full of layered sonic fury and anxiety, each song building up to a point and then descending down through a militant, catchy hook.‘In the Spirit World Now’ marks a milestone for this Northern California punk outfit who have stayed true to themselves as songwriters throughout massive sonic growth throughout their storied career… We talk to band member Andy Nelson about creating looking forward, performing live and recharging off tour…

TSH: What was the band dynamic like as you guys reconnected and began work on ‘In the Spirit World Now’?

Andy: Well, no Ceremony record really ever comes together without challenges. I think this is because we always have a goal of never doing anything that comes about easily. Nothing is ever predictable with us; as a result the only thing that we knew when we went into the studio this time was that the thing we were going to make would be an entirely new record on all fronts. Other bands probably approach things differently and stick to their distinct sound, but not us.

TSH: Did you outline certain goals this time around?

Andy: Our goal is to make stuff that we haven’t made before. It’s not really an issue of having to challenge ourselves. When you get to your 5th or 6th record it does get hard. It’s a pretty tense and emotional time for all involved in the band because we all are very unified in wanting to do better, and we aren’t gonna do something half hearted.

TSH: Did you create with a specific level of focus?

Andy: In creating the artwork, lyrics and what the songs were going to be, we created looking forward rather than anything else. The mindset of the band was to try to create something fully distinct and new. Ceremony wanted to create something that stood apart from anything we had done before.

TSH: Ross has mentioned that he used to be afraid of change, but now he embraces it...

Andy: I think with Ross there’s a sort of duality to it. He’s always sort of scared of change - not just with his creative choices but with life in general, but only he knows why he embraces this factor. I mean this band is so important to him and as a creator he constantly has the instinct to be something else and switch things up.

TSH: What led to the songs having more expansive palettes this time around?

Andy: The songs we wrote just led themselves to expansive palettes sonically, which meant using piano, synths, lots of guitar tracks and weird pedals. We didn’t really set out to instrument the album in a particular way, we just wrote the songs the way we always do and when we started tracking them and they took shape, we then realised what each song needed.

TSH: What stands out most when you overlook a track like ‘Turn Away the Bad Thing’?

Andy: That song actually took a while. The demo had a bridge that was just not quite right. However, we kept thinking about it, and then Anthony had the idea of bringing the bridge down like a Pink Floyd type of style. The verse and chorus was written the same way we write any other song but the bridge was new territory for us.

TSH: What does ‘Years of Love’ signify to you personally?

Andy: When you’re in the musical part of the band and you’re not in the lyric or singing part of the band, you tend to have a funny relationship with songs. I mean they are not your words or thoughts. I experience Ceremony through the lens of my friend. I feel that Ross has this great ability to write lyrics that are both energetic and they pump you up but the content of the lyrics are also inner-looking and forlorn... and these are along the lines of what this song means to me.

TSH: Do you feel that not reflecting on the evolution of the band keeps you motivated?

Andy: I guess so. This way of thinking is not cynical or reactionary that’s for sure. It’s tempting to simplify a lot of what our music is about and label each record with a certain style or angle or gimmick. However, in reality Ceremony has always written music in the exact same way whether it’s a demo from 2006 or the new record now. It’s the same people in room writing what feels good. When we finished this latest album, it felt good to know that we finally made a record that fully encompasses what we are capable of doing. It’s us at the height of our powers doing the stuff we do - whether it’s moody introspective stuff or unpredictable stuff - it’s all catchy and has a personality to it.

TSH: There’s always an atmospheric and pulsating feel when Ceremony performs live. How do you feel with more music to incorporate into the live shows?

Andy: I feel in ways it’s best to experience Ceremony live because it becomes clear what we are able to do as a band. We play a range of music - both old and new - our set ends up going to a lot of places. With regards to playing new material, it’s like using a colour metaphor - we’re adding some new colours to our palette, which allows our shows to be different and engaging for the audience.

TSH: Are there particular inspirations that you’ve been drawn to in recent times?

Andy: I’ve been thinking a lot about a writer named Mark Fisher. Mark used to do this blog called K-Punk and he wrote a bunch of books and essays about music and culture. He also wrote about capitalism, which was really great. He killed himself a few years ago, which was really tragic because he was one of the great thinkers in my opinion. Mark wrote a lot about the problems of living in the world these days, in particular how people don’t really have the ability to envision the future anymore. As a mass culture people have been broken down by the world being really bad because of things capitalism, or in this day and age Brexit or Trump. We’re stuck in constant loops of revisiting the same things over and over again - which explains nostalgic culture, band reunions, television reboots and even irony seeping into advertising. It’s a horrible way to live.

TSH: What are your touring downtime essentials?

Andy: You never get much free time on tour unless you have a big bus crew; then you can fuck around all day. I used to be a big record collector, but I have gotten spoilt over the years and I don’t want to have to look after the records I’ve purchased. Maybe this makes me old and boring, haha! I’m also a big coffee guy. I like to figure out where the best coffee places are on tour and experience them.

TSH: Is recharging and rest when you’re back home a must for you?

Andy: Yes, rest and sleep is so important when I’m back home. I meditate at home and do a fair bit of yoga. I started transcendental yoga a few years ago and it’s really helpful. I’m a huge movie guy too. I saw the new Tarantino movie (Once Upon a Time in Hollywood) recently and it was really good. It’s definitely one of his more upbeat movies, and it’s more sophisticated than people give it credit for. Also, I’m really excited to see this movie Parasite too; it’s by this Korean director Bong Joon-ho. I recently finished this book called On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous by a poet named Ocean Vuong, which was great. It’s written as a letter to this kid’s mom. I love it when poets write novels.

TSH: What is your biggest drive with Ceremony as you look ahead?

Andy: My greatest interest with music is creating stuff with my friends. Also, it’s so vital to try to communicate on some level. This aspect itself can take lots of different forms, it’s doesn’t just have to be a chat between people - it can be all kinds of things. Travelling and playing music is part of this for me too. Also, creating records that become part of people’s lives is part of this too. In a sense I do agree with Oscar Wilde that art is useless, but it’s also kind of the only thing. It’s important to have even a small effect on the world. Our way to have impact is via collective action, and being in a band is a form of this. All of us in Ceremony create stuff because that’s what we do - and there’s not really an off switch for that.

Ceremony - “In the Spirit World Now”

Ceremony - “Turn Away the Bad Thing”

In the Spirit World Now

#Interview #Ceremony

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