#it’s a weird issue so I’m mostly watching for nice visuals of different parts but I don’t think I would have been nearly as interested if I

[cutcontinuity]

I enjoyed reading tgcf for a variety of reasons and was very interested in the mysteries they solved and the overall narrative (the flashbacks killed me but also the reveal!!) but the animation is on Netflix and I’m honestly watching it for hualian interactions (why is it hualian instead of xiehua or chenglian dhdhdhdh) but I feel like Xie Lian’s VA isn’t as “expressive”? As I had read his voice to be?

[thesimperiuscurse]

08.04

It’s The Kingston Legacy’s sixth anniversary, so here’s a throwback post to celebrate! Last month I forced myself to reread the entire legacy, and while I stopped, clicked off the tab, and emitted a soundless scream of pure cringe numerous times (I wish I was kidding)—the past generations are actually not as terrible as I remember. I think enough time has passed for me to detach myself from the childish storytelling and look back in nostalgia. 

Thank you to my fellow Wordpress writers who have come along the journey, some for many years now, through every high and low. It’s astounding how much has changed in the legacy from when I was 15, and 21. Follow me down the (very) long memory lane, as I reminiscence about each story and my perspective on them now ❤

Generation 1 — Fern (2015)

To my shock, I found myself genuinely enjoying Fern’s story. I think this was because the first generation was purely me commentating on gameplay, and not trying to write a story (that’s when the cringe began). I was inspired by one of the original stories, Alice and Kev, to make a homeless sim and document her struggle for a better life: Fern, a snobby aspiring writer. Reading this, a huge wave of nostalgia hit me, and it reminded me of how wonderful Sims 3 gameplay is. Although I’m long past it now, there’s real heart and life in the design. I think it speaks about the rich personalities and quirks that I could write a whole life story off it. It was super fun making Fern camp out at Old Pier Beach, stealing from townie picnics and roasting apples on the fire, finding little ways to scrounge money, giving her a makeover in the salon, watching the townie dramas unfold around her. Although she faced homelessness two times and a shitty first husband (yeah, fuck off, Xander), Fern grew into a strong and independent yet sweet and gentle character, in love with the ocean like her great-granddaughter comes to be.  

I never actually addressed this, but she (and her love Christopher) passed away in the story between the end of Gen 3 and start of Gen 4. It just felt weird to make it a big deal because they never died in game—still ‘alive’ and well, scattered across different backup saves and the bin.  

Generation 2 — Briar (2015)

Briar’s story was strange, because it was half gameplay and half story, which meant that there were things that just did not... make... sense. She was quite an ‘unreliable’ character to follow because of her Insane trait. The plot revolved around her as a fresh detective, investigating supernatural phenomena in Sunset Valley. Her character arc was almost the opposite to her mother’s: a naive, optimistic, silly girl hardening through trauma into a cold and ruthless police chief. Ash’s death was the one moment I felt true sadness in this legacy, because he did really die. Imagine me actually getting emotional over my characters, lmao. Wild. 

Also, Max is OP. To this day he is one of the best male characters in my legacy, a healthy and supportive best friend (to husband) in stark contrast to the following generation. 

Fallen Angels — Cherry (2016-2019)

Yes. It’s this generation. Square the fuck up, Cherry. I will fight her any day. Old readers will know of my pure hatred for this story. It’s been about two years since it thankfully ended. My verdict now?

It’s not quite as horrifically shitty, Gabriel and Lilith being a lot nicer than I remembered (Gabriel’s only a bit of a dick at the start), but it still has glaring problems, such as the pacing and clumsy handling of sensitive topics. The story would have been far nicer if it focused less on Cherry and Luc’s relationship and their respective issues, more on the found family and her relationship with Gabriel (which was rushed due to me despising the story by that point). During the first chapters, I was cringing spectacularly at the combination of Luc’s initial jackass behaviour and Cherry’s whining. Toxic as FUCK. I had to skip 3.8 and 3.9 entirely. These two (because of my own shameful mistake) tainted the generation in my eyes, and even though all of the characters grew from their toxicity, I can’t really see past that guilt to the better parts of the story. 

Jade has been telling me for years that this story isn’t all bad, and upon forcing myself to reread, I can see what you mean. I’m sorry LOL. Something that pleasantly surprised me was the writing quality (just the prose, not the actual story mechanics... lmfao), and Raphael, who made me smile every time he appeared. Every single careless, sarcastic line of his was a banger. The pictures are something else I like, too. Many of them stand up to the best ones in En Pointe—the fiery, gritty, industrial tones of Bridgeport just hits different. The world was rich and immersive, which is missing at the moment in En Pointe because of me being too lazy to build a proper Los Angeles world, but Act III is set in Boroughsburg so I’m excited to get back into the city scenes. 17 year old me wasn’t mature enough to tackle dark themes, but at least the visuals for them were nice, I guess. The atmosphere of the story I really enjoy. It’s just the toxic characters and way-too-angsty moments that ruin the whole thing for me. 

En Pointe — Evangeline (2019-)

And here we are now! The early chapters are kinda painful to read because 1) Mako looked so ugly and 2) the dialogue was so clumsy and generic. I sighed in relief when Chapter 5 came around, because it was then both of those aspects really began to improve. Eva’s voice was simple, with her punchy remarks, much less romantic and descriptive than Cherry, so it was interesting to see her voice becoming more complex and layered as I more understood her character. Also, me visibly struggling with the natural lighting and only getting a handle on it 7 chapters later has me shaking my head. 

I’m already beginning to identify issues with the story, mostly with character arcs and pacing. It’s a strange combination of fast pacing (spanning half a year in 8 chapters) and Eva becoming surprisingly comfortable with Mako’s touch due to their unusual pas de deux circumstances. It’s curious how real life time actually played into the pacing of the story—because of the slow publishing schedule, less time has passed in the story as real life, so it’s almost as if the time jumps were made up by real life time, making the jumps feel not too strange. Reading consecutively, however, Evako’s relationship growth doesn’t feel slow burn... a little underdeveloped, in a way, despite their lengthy conversations. I think that’s because of Mako being such a reserved and mysterious character, and that I’ve unconsciously come to rely on Tumblr to give more depth to the characters/relationships. Luckily, pretty much everyone who comments on the story also follows me here, so this dual-platform storytelling is okay, I suppose. I want to post more of #Mishako since there just isn’t enough time to explore their bromance in the story!

At the moment I’m not happy with the story, but it’s fine. I’m learning. There’s more than half the story to go, which means plenty of time to reflect upon the issues and improve. I’m really looking forward to Eva and Mako’s character arcs in Act III. At the moment their relationship is based on their natural chemistry and respect for each other, and since they are yet to face trials their bond isn’t super deep, but Evako are still my favourite couple in the legacy thus far, and feel much more real than any character I’ve written before. It’s been very interesting for my aro ass (and being way more logical than emotional) to figure out a dynamic that is actually compelling to me, because most of the time when I look at romance I’m just like 😐🤨 I’m liking it so far but we shall see how everything unfolds, because I have barely any idea what’s going to happen beyond Act II, lmfao. 

That’s it for my incredibly long throwback! I hope it was at least nice for the OG readers, and interesting for anyone else who managed to battle through this essay, haha. This family has been an integral part of me growing up, as a person and writer and artist (what I’ve developed in visuals I apply to architecture), learning a great deal of awareness about real life through story research, which is pretty cool now that I think about it. I’m aiming to finish En Pointe by the end of 2022. I’m excited for what unexpected changes are to come!

[korissideblog]

Ok! ONE more actor AU post, then I’ll start switching Aito’s quirk <3

(if you have any recommendations for that btw, send an ask lol)

[work in progress!!]

[We need to get this out for next week’s issue. Ichiro’s working on the visuals, you guys make the transcript look nice.]

[yes sir.]

[Aye boss!]

[You got it]

Hello! I’m Kiyoshi Ono, joined here today by none other than Shishio Ramos! Actor in the new series Kimi no Hīrō Akademia!

Hi! [awe! This kid is so sweet] [He’s barely said anything yet] [hush!]

Hi there Ramos! Could you tell us what this new series is going to be about, and who you’re playing?

Oh yeah! Totally! Well- pretty much it’s a highschool for super powered kids, where[nice][Nice!][?][look at the word count!][juveniles]they each can show off their special abilities and train to become pro heroes! Pro being taken literally there- they’re training to become professional heroes! It’s a really fun thing. Ah- and my character is Aito Takao! Takao’s a silly sort of character- kinda like a villain but she’s on the hero’s side in the end. She’s comic relief for when things get too heavy- mostly because she doesn’t care about what’s making everyone else all bummed out [laughter] yeah- she’s a really narcissistic character- but she’s funny so it’s ok.

Yes, my daughter read the manga that inspired Kimi no Hīrō Akademia, and she says that you guys are making a lot of changes- specifically to Takao?

Oh- yeah [laughter] we’re making a couple changes. Takao’s gonna have the same personality and stuff- don’t worry fans- but… you know, we’ll be adjusting a couple things to make Takao an easier role for me to play. He’ll be going by she/him pronouns for one-

She/Him pronouns?

-yeah! Takao’s gonna be genderfluid! For those who don’t know, there’s a ton of different ways to be genderfluid, but the way that I’m gonna portray Takao as- you know, the way I am- pretty much he’s gonna be kinda a little mix of boy and girl? Ah- it’s kinda hard to explain without getting into a lot of different topics, but- pretty much what the audience has to know is that you could refer to Takao with both he/him and she/her pronouns, and his uniform is gonna be both slacks and a skirt! [Ahhh! I just adore Ramos <333] [he’s just explaining gender presentation?][I KNOW!!!]

Alright, good to know! Anything else you think the fans would like to know about changes?

Yes actually! So- in the manga, both Takao’s parents are like, super dead [laughter] but! The writers thought it would be more fun to [nice] [juvenile][JUVENILE!!!] keep Takao’s mother alive, and be kinda ambiguous with his dad. I won’t go too much into it- but I think new and returning fans of the series are really gonna like it!

Perfect! Now, let’s talk more about you

Oh boy-

[laughter] Don’t worry Ramos- I just wanna learn a bit more about behind the scenes stuff. You’re just coming off Good Morning Nakamuras!, how would you describe the transition between Hanta Kobayashi and Aito Takao?

oh lord- [laughter] yeah yeah- there’s a lot of difference between the two. You can see it really prominently in the writing. Good Morning Nakamuras! was a family sitcom, so it was a lot of ‘someone says something’ ‘someone else says something’ ‘Hanta says something either funny or dumb’ and then a laugh track. Sometimes someone else would come after Hanta to carry the joke, but usually it was just that. [awe… I’m gonna miss Good Morning Nakamuras!] [same here, it was my mom’s favorite!] But with Takao, it’s a much faster pace. It’s just ‘someone says something’ and then immediately ‘Takao says something funny or dumb’ and then immediately back to ‘someone else says something’ and then ‘Takao says something funny or dumb.’ I-I don’t know if I’m explaining it well- it’s just that Takao talks all the time and always has something new or witty to say. He’s just a chatter box without a filter and- that’s kinda fun to do- I always get the final word and it’s always gonna get a laugh, you know? [have you guys seen the trailer yet?] [no, but my niece has! She’s really excited to see the premiere!!] [i have. it looks weird, but my brother is excited for it. his favorite is the blonde one i think]

There’s also the problem with the stunts, you know? Like- the worst of it on Nakamuras! was just the parts where I had to jump the fence, and even then it was just every couple of episodes. On KNHA I have to do all these cool fighting moves- and not to mention how deranged Takao is just… naturally [laughter] he’s just a very energetic guy with a fondness for climbing things- and people! Like you have no clue how tall someone is until your boss points at them and is like “hey, go climb them.” And you have to do it! The pro tip I’m gonna give people-climbers: it’s all in the legs [laughter] you just have to get your legs around them and pray that you don’t look as stupid as you feel. God- the worst part is when you’re climbing someone who's the same height as you! Hiroharu’s actor is about my height, and I have to climb him all the damn time. It feels like you’re gonna crush them, you know? Like you just have to be as light as possible and hope and pray that they can support you. And- and I know that he can, you know? Like me and him have the same personal trainer, and Kyo-San doesn’t do “easy” [laughter] I know that he can hold me, there’s just always that fear you know?

Oh definitely- and speaking of Hiroharu’s actor, we know you’re on the lower end of the age spectrum, do you think that affects how you all work together?

Oh no, definitely not! Yeah I’m younger than a lot of my coworkers, but not by much- 19, 20 in June. I mean I’m glad that I’m so young! Like I said- Hiroharu’s actor is about my height, and I’m like 173, and… you know… Hiroharu’s actor is over 21 I think- he sometimes offers to get drinks with us, so he’s definitely 21 and up- and I hear people stop growing after 18…

What? [laughter] What are your tying to say?

Oh my god wait- wait you can’t leave that in! I work with that guy! I can’t call him short in an interview before the show actually starts- ohh no! Oh god!

The average man’s height is 175!

Oh- ah I’m sure- I’m sure that-that’s true- oh my god-

I’m 174!

Oh my god we can’t leave this in! [laughter] oh my god- I’m sorry I just- I come from a tall family so sometimes I forget that- that you know people- oh my god we have to cut this out [laughter] [make sure to remove this bit] [awe! But it’s funny!!] [we’ll literally be sued if we don’t] [you two are no fun :(]

But yeah, age doesn’t really get in the way of things. We’re all good friends on set- especially Hoshizawa’s actor! Him and Shimoda-san are really cool guys, I love hanging out with them!

Shimoda-san? As in Kosuke Shimoda?

Yes! Shimoda-san plays Ikuto Maekawa, and since our characters are such great friends, I’d like to think we are as well! He’s a real fun guy, and I’m excited to work with such a huge talent- everyone- everyone there is so talented and I’m so lucky to be there.

Ah, speaking of talent. While a large portion of the cast is hidden, we have seen some familiar faces in the trailer. We’ve also seen some familiar faces on social media…

Oh my god-

[laughter] you never publicly addressed it, Ramos! Do you want to talk about your fight with Bryce Aoki?

Oh lord… [laughter] everyone’s so dramatic- so it wasn’t a fight- it’s just- ok so we had a little scene together where I would push him out of frame, but he wanted to still be seen and I was fine with that. Choreography is very important to me, so we had a passionate discussion-

Passionate discussion that ended with Aoki getting a black eye?

That- [laughter] that was an accident! I was- so we were practicing by the makeup desks- bad decision I know, but- stop looking at me like that! [laughter] It was just- we’re standing like we would in the scene, and I go to shove him- and- and I’m aiming for his head but- but maybe I accidentally hit his eye - and he absolutely wipes out, like this kid’s on the ground and I’m like “holy sh*t I just punched a kid” you know? [laughter] [she’s like, barely a year older than him…] but! Bryce is a sweetheart, and luckily he’s alright-

He got a black eye! He posted about it!

Oh he! He’s just a bit dramatic! He’s an actor though, it’s our jobs to be a bit looney [laughter]

Alright then, it seems we've run out of time for tonight. Anything you want to say?

Yes! I want to wish everyone a lovely evening! Thank you for the support! -And make sure to watch Kimi No Hīrō Akademia when it comes out this summer!

[sanstropfremir]

would love to hear ur thoughts re. these street woman fighter's performances and who you would personally vote as the "better dance crew" in how they interpreted each other choreos and the song.

this was for their first elimination round (ep4) and it was interesting to hear from the judges + why they gave the points they did. (i'm not entirely sure if you're watching the show's episodes. they are roughly 2 hours long. so if you would like more context, pls let me know! i wrote brief comments underneath each one as well as the winners [spoilers ahead!]. assuming you are not: for this mission, each crew is paired with another crew and they have to choreograph one of the soloist songs. songs were "split" into two parts: part one [would be one song] and part two [another song]; one crew would choreograph one part and follow the other's crew choreograph for the other part.)

1. boa - eat you up (want choreo) + better (ygx choreo). dance crews: ygx vs want

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCfK_qWAhM0&ab_channel=MnetTV

winner: ygx. boa gave 151 pts to ygx and 49 pts to want (the biggest gap in points between crews), sharing that although want choreographed eat you up, ygx was more cohesive (pointing to how want wore hats and it was messy). additionally, ygx had better stage presence and was able to capture the camera more. also, because ygx is the only crew to have a b-girl and use it in their routine, the judges applauded want for doing the best they can.

2. cl - doctor pepper (wayb) + hello bitches (prowdmon). dance crews: prowdmon vs wayb

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GEEpZ9SrvaE&ab_channel=MnetTV

winner: prowdmon. judges shared that doctor pepper's routine is a trademark of wayb and that they should have been the standout. however, they felt like prowdmon did it better.

3. hyuna - crazy (4minute) (coca n butter) + i'm not cool (hook) + lip and hip (hook). dance crews: hook vs coca n butter

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e1ikpPKEA30&ab_channel=MnetTV

winner: hook. the two dance crews are VERY different in terms of style. coca n butter is described to be more hip-hop while hook is definitely more reflective of the current/newer trends. (when hook was first introduced in the show, they were known as the crew who was famous only for tiktok dances.) the judges shared that hook was more fun and interesting, given their stylistic choice of wearing the pink wigs. whereas it seemed for coca n butter, they felt like something was lacking (they showed something but it didn't feel they did.)

4. jessi - what type of xx (lachica) + nununa (holybang) + gucci (holybang). dance crews: holybang vs lachica

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtZzI11oyqc&ab_channel=MnetTV

winner: lachica. (this was the only battle where both crews came in v close pts. whereas for the other crews, there were huge point-gaps.) judges had a hard time choosing, sharing that for lachica they were more detail-oriented while holybang had better teamwork.

-

imo, i agree with the judges' choices. though i would have to say i think wayb did their routine (doctor pepper) better than prowdmon. they stood out to me then, but when it came to the second part (hello bitches), prowdmon was better. i loved lachica's performance - it was v clean + reminded me of something a kpop group would do (which like, the crew largely works with kpop acts like chungha, boa's better, etc. so it makes sense).

-

this was LONG. thank u if u do read it and post! i miss the kingdom "era" when u would post weekly reviews. the two are v different but this new mnet competition show is the only one i'm invested in. i'm not sure if it's big internationally? i know it is v popular in korea right now. while i've only seen i-fans talk about the show as it relates to chaeyeon (want) because she's an idol. - swf (streetwomanfighter) anon :]

omg this is so long and well organized, forget me writing reviews anon you should do it!! i'm not currently watching the full episodes but i've been catching the few clips that pop up in my youtube recommended occasionally, so i definitely don't have all the context but i'll take a crack at it!

ok so my assumption/from what i can tell, they have a bit of leeway to alter the competing group's choreo as needed to better suit numbers and formations. i also went and found the individual versions of these because why did they make them so small on the split screen, don't they know i'm old and wear glasses. also: MNET FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY STOP MOVING THE FUCKING CAMERA. WE DO NOT NEED SCROLLING VERTICAL BOOM SHOTS OF THIS. just keep the same lens at eye level it's really not that hard. this is like, one of the worst possible ways to shoot dance it is SO annoying. ok i'm done bitching about that let's go.

1. boa - ygx vs want i agree with the big point gap on this one, and i think want made a couple of choices that were not cohesive enough, and obviously they also got set up to fail by ygx. actually i think both groups made choices that were not particularly good, but ygx had more of the skills to back up what they were doing than want did. breaking is very difficult and requires a lot of upper body strength and a higher centre of gravity, which are two physical traits that are less common in women. personally i wouldn't have tried to break to better because although boa songs do have more of a beat than other idol music, it's still not at all the right type of music for breaking. it's gotta be fast, breakers rely on speed, because it's all about momentum; they're literally throwing themselves around the stage. here's the final from battle pro 2019 for example. the music is basically beats only; heavily lyric based music, like idol music, is bad for battling in general because there isn't a lot of consistency. i have more to say about this but i'm getting off track. basically by choosing to handicap the other team (because they don't have a bgirl at all) they shot their own bgirl in the foot because the song is too slow to properly show off her skills. i applaud want for making bold choices, like the hatwork and attempting the breaking, but ultimately when combined with their styling the performance looks disjointed. also they have some formation cohesion issues that make it look a bit like they'e struggling to keep up, even with their own choreo.

2. cl - prowdmon vs wayb i agree with the judges, i think prowdmon bodied the wayb choreo. i actually thought that was their choreo at first. they have the best presence that i've seen of all the groups and the performative "hard bitch" attitude fit in with their genre setting. wayb had several mistakes and synchronization issues that in my opinion made them look sloppy in comparision to prowdmon, who were sharper and had two more people to put into formations. 3. hyuna - hook vs coca n butter ok personally i don't like either of these choreos, but i'm agreeing with the judges here, i think hook's was the mildly more engaging. i can tell that they're very young and do mostly short form tiktok content because i see a lot of eye catching moves, but i don't see a lot of strong connective tissue between those moves. they have good ideas but they also really struggle with putting people into formation and balancing it out well. it doesn't help that they're a seven member crew going up against a four member one, so they have three extra people to figure out what to do with. there's a lot of empty space where there are members waiting in position for a group formation. it also doesn't help at all that they (mnet) appear to just be rawdogging the songs together without any kind of mixing, which is a huge detriment to groups that have to choreograph for two in their section. i'm not cool and lip and hip have two totally different feels and kudos to hook for at least trying to get them to at least visually be cohesive when mnet is go girl giving us nothing sonically. coca n butter has much more of an old school hip hop style, so putting these two up against each other was (probably a random lot draw) an interesting choice. personally i would have been more interested to see hook against want with the boa tracks and ygx against coca n butter with the hyuna tracks. however, i think the reason why coca n butter's stage felt like it was lacking is because they tried to emulate hyuna, without having the stage presence or the weirdness of hyuna. it feels like they're trying too hard and there isn't really any personal character in the piece, versus with hook, who embodied hyuna's weirdness a little more authentically and took a completely different direction. 4. jessi - lachica vs holybang lachica took this one easily, although their formations were a bit wonky for nununana, they covered it fairly well and i think they managed the best transition between songs (between nununana and gucci). they were sharper with good stage pictures and had a good gimmick with the double fringe on the gloves and hats. holy bang had some issues fitting their extra person into the what type of x choreo, but they did well with their own choreo. however, like with coca n butter and hook, because lachica took a new visual spin, this felt too derivative of jessi, so it wasn't that interesting for me to watch. i do think they are one of the groups on the stronger end of skills and presence. --- as far as visually what performances i liked the best, since would this even be a writeup by me if i didn't talk about design, here's a quick breakdown:

prowdmon - got some rudimentary setpieces, got a theme, got some fun variations on a uniform look; excellent for what i assume was limited budget capacity and also it's a dance crew show.

lachica - great continuity of effect in costuming with the fringe, and using the gloves as a mouth/lip effect was one of the most interesting choices of these routines.

hook - the pink wigs and the black latex on the checkered floor was a nice gimmick that was a bit of a nod to hyuna's weird without being too derivative. i'm not expecting a whole lot because these are dance crews but i think this was a decent amount of styling effort.

want - they made a bold choice with the hats and even though it didn't quite pay off for them i still respect it.

coca n butter/ygx/holybang/wayb - ygx and wayb did basic hip hop type styling and while it's absolutely fine, it's just boring. holybang went for a directly inspired jessi look, and although yes bodysuits, overall it wasn't that interesting either. coca n butter get props for doing a costume change and actually incorporating that into the choreo but it feels too much like it's trying to be hyuna weird with the caution tape strapped over their tits and asses.

---

as a final note/question to you, my lovely invested swf anon, what's the format of the show? are there stages like this every episode to review? if these were from the fourth one only, is there anything worth me reviewing in the first three? i'm not particularly interested in the aggressive competitive nature of the show and editing so i don't particularly want to watch the full two hour episodes, but if you think it's worthwhile for me to review stuff then i will. otherwise if there's a set structure (like with kingdom) i can seek out the stages specifically and review them if i know what i'm looking for.

[immortal-teacher]

Albert Einstein said "Everything is energy and that's all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics"

Most people don't realize that sounds, shapes, colors and words are all connected through various frequency vibrations. Play a chord and there is a corresponding geometrical shape that is in place, and a color associated with that frequency and vibration! Sacred Geometry, sound, chakras

I have figured out how to make anything reality and how the universe works after experimenting with a variety of affirmations and i will explain with knowledge from many teachers that I have figured out the details and proven myself with experiments, memories, scientific explanations and more.

So everything is Frequency and Vibration or nonphysical and physical, We are all co-creators who create frequencies that create and control the material and physical world. We operate and think on frequency, including belief systems are frequencies and that controls our vibration.

Vibration is our body and the frequencies that we operate and think on control the type of thoughts we can have, how we feel, how we interact with all life and everything around us including gaining new abilities, becoming immortal or anything it seems anything is possible once you say or listen to an affirmation, subliminal, mantra, frequency or believe something long enough

then it will come true eventually. The Mastermind Principle explains how opposing frequencies cannot exist in the same area. For example during hypnosis people have proven how if i say my finger is burning hot then it will burn your skin as i get closer and start to blister.

Somebody has put down all his weight on a knife on his neck then got hit full force with a sledgehammer on his back but it did not pierce his skin because his belief/frequency

that he operates on. The frequencies also cause hallucinations based on beliefs, for example i thought people i date would reply fast so when i first got a phone in 7th grade i would message people and past girlfriends and reply fast because i didn't have many chores to do and of course really wanted to talk to my now ex girlfriend so while waiting for a reply from her, i would get vibrations from my

phone just like i got a message but when i checked then i see no messages or notifications and this went on like a hundred times until 10th grade when i got a new girlfriend(ex girlfriend) that explained why it took so long to reply, which is because she does many chores for her family, she didn't have Brothers and sisters around her age to help out.

So i first started learning about how the universe works after 5 years of searching to cure my shyness, depression and slight anger issues, along the way i did some searching into empathic abilities, how to live forever and more through many teachers mostly on google and Youtube, nothing really worked until i found this

video by "YouAreCreators" Youtube channel called "The secrets of frequency and vibration" packed full of cool experiments including how the nine solfeggio frequencies cured 16 out of 16 terminally ill cancer patients

within 70 days which i hear is the worst kind of cancer. So i started both the nine solfeggio frequencies and i am affirmations both free on YouTube at the same time, after listening to them for 2 and a half weeks then i started

waking up with this extremely blissful feeling, super energized, feeling great, thinking faster and more clearly, form more complex thoughts, process information faster, i work at top speed all day like an adrenaline rush and

it seems i have infinite energy but i stopped listening temporarily thinking it would last forever but then the great feelings gradually went away after 72 hours.

Some of my experiments that helped me discover how the universe works include listening and or saying affirmations

like "i am connected to the source, i am a part of god, i am a piece of the creator, i am wise, i am walking brilliance, i am total understanding, i am infinite wisdom, i am genius, i am over joyed, i am educated, i am infinite, i am wise council, i am energetic, i am boundless, i am brilliant, I am Happy, i am Healthy, i am invincible, i am immortal, i am loving, i am caring, kind, strong" and many more

in other people's affirmations then they all came true and when i asked questions in my head then five different times i got answers it seemed i could have never thought of.

I have even tried subliminals for faster reflexes and think fast like a human computer then started catching everything that i bumped off the shelf when trying to work faster including 3 items i dropped at the same time so i lowered my body slightly and hugged them like i could

see them falling in slow motion.

Dr. Joe Dispenza says learning makes new connections in the brain, so the more that you can repeat what you have learned, the more you are installing the neurological hardware in the brain in preparation for the experience then

when you feel the experience and emotion then your teaching your body chemically what you have intellectually understood, then the body understands better than the mind after enough practice. He said our job

is to go from philosopher to initiate to master, from knowledge to experience to wisdom, from mind to body to soul, from thinking to doing to being, from learning it with your head to practicing it with your hands and knowing it by heart.

How you think and feel changes your state of being, (end of the quote) because you think the pill or surgery will heal you then it doesn't matter if it is a sugar pill or fake surgery, it will work, that is the famous placebo effect. I read that most people get results between 21 to 85 days of any daily affirmation, frequency, subliminal, mantra etc then after 3 months of daily practice then it will be permanent.

After saying i am immortal and i am invincible for about a month and a half then i turned around and accidentally fell what seemed to be the fastest fall ever at work because the floor was really slick then i felt no pain at all and didn't even get hurt and i kept track for a month after just

in case if i needed to report it.

After saying that i do not need food to survive, i do not need food to thrive about 50 times daily for 3 days then those 3 days i ate 50%-75% less food because i felt full and could not really eat much throughout the day including my work lunch time that i usually eat the whole time.

Mahatma Gandhi said "Your beliefs become your thoughts, your thoughts become your words, Your words become your actions, Your actions become your habits, Your habits become your values, Your values become your destiny."

I found that fear or doubt attracts what you fear or doubt because I found a new technique while playing pool that I can visualize a tunnel where the white ball will go and the next ball and make the shot everytime if I stay confident, aim

the goal ball first then the white ball with the tunnel but if I doubt I'll make it or fear I'll mess up or get bumped then I can't visualize the tunnel technique so I tried relying on another technique but then I fail.

After

listening to affirmations about world peace then it gave me new perceptions that helped me because i was running on the "be nice" frequency so then i was able to tell

people the right way to do things otherwise i could report them to the FDA for leaving refrigerated food out at room temperature for hours instead of 30 minutes. They would pull out pallets of food about 6 feet tall stacked to fit the most

food on each pallet then say only one person per pallet which took this one guy 3 hours and a half to stock the shelves so now those expiration dates are wrong.

I have tried mantras and subliminals to become more attractive then 6 people flirt with me in one day, everyone was

smiling at me and i got 4 phone numbers from female co-workers because the other 2 flirting was guys but I'm only attracted to females.

Also with Aaron Doughty's help, he refers to Hawkin's scale from "fear to enlightenment" often with examples and his experiences which really helped me out but he still

does not completely know what he is talking about as far as i know but i don't watch most of his videos. I had help from many teachers and i sometimes still look for more

knowledge to improve life for the greater good of all! First

time i heard the detox frequency that is known to eliminate electromagnetic radiation, Viruses, diseases, infections, toxins, bacteria, fungal etc "741 Hz" i heard just about an hour or two then sweat 3 nights in a row so much

during winter that i woke up once each night because the sweat i was soaked in got cold so i dried off and rolled over each night but with constant use i don't notice any sweat

really if i do it daily or weekly. Music tuned to 528Hz gives us more energy daily because it returns our DNA to its perfect form also 528Hz is the frequency at which life is created and when i listen daily then i keep benefits constantly all day.

Other

people's beliefs and our own beliefs and fears influence us subconsciously that influences thoughts, abilities and choices either positive or negative but we can learn what negative and or deconstructive frequencies we operate on by listening to our thoughts and words then reverse the negative and deconstructive ones,

I figured this out because I heard weird beliefs that I didn't believe that effected me in a negative way but now I looped an affirmation video using desktop version for protection from anything negative on my cracked phone it charges slow but it works.

With a world of technology that can brainwash you on a silent frequency displayed on the patent technology website then We must brainwash ourselves for everything good and have a negative and deconstructive frequencies blocker like i listen to daily in my Daily playlist that i try to keep under 6 hours to listen 3 times daily for more effect i add more helpful videos after so i have

something else to listen to while sleeping. We can create new empowering, optimistic, hopeful, loving, gratefulness, forgiving life for all. Always think what is the opposite of the negative, remember to stay and think positive, constructive and always work with science to figure

out what is for the greater good of all and if you ever have questions google or youtube can't answer then ask me, I'd love to help and I've also gained benefits

from meditation, mantras, subliminals, mindful breathing, Orgone Pendant necklace from "wish .com" i believe that the intentions i set in my gemstones to help me

bring world peace, love and happiness to all helped because it does seem easier to teach and twice now after meeting people who told me i was wrong because they

chose one of the 2000 religions which are belief systems from other humans both times christian but my gemstones start shocking my leg when they fill up to much of the negative energy and shock my hand if i touch them, stronger than static shock, like those electric shock pens.

Sungazing the safe way reduces needed food intake gradually to zero by connecting to earth's electromagnetic field I'm at 8 minutes but on your First day the sun should be near touching the horizon and look at

the top of the sun then left, right, bottom and repeat for 10 seconds then only increase 10 seconds once daily until 44 minutes and 40 seconds is completed then the sungazing part is done to get energy just walk on earth slow,

relaxed and barefoot for 45 minutes a day for the average person for enough energy throughout the day but i read many different stories it seems you still can drink and

eat but in the Thomas Jefferson University study they kept track of this man 24/7 for 200 days they monitored all of his bodily functions and they said he didn't eat or drink anything but he did bath and they measured the bath

water and he was healthier than anyone 20 years younger than him and he was about 70 years old.

At another university the same guy was monitored for 411 days but they didn't even believe him about not needing food or drink so i think they said he did accept some buttermilk from them.

I heard one guy rose his frequency and vibration so high that he cured everyone at an insane asylum just by walking in, they told him he could not speak to them but just being near him everyone of them past all the tests to get out within a week.

People with multiple personality disorder sometimes will have cancer in one personality then scan them 2 minutes later in another personality then the cancer is gone. One woman who got cancer i think her name might be Doloris Cannon

but before she went in for her cancer treatment, she forgave everyone in her life then went to the doctor that said after scanning her again that her cancer is gone and that's the only thing she did different in her life and i personally have forgiven everyone for my health without actually telling them and it felt like 100 pounds lifted off my heart.

If you want to know more about the Science just ask or google ~Bruce Lipton~ is a cellular biologist that has proven all the science of beliefs, fears, thoughts and choices creating our reality.

According to RC Henry, a professor of physics and astronomy at Johns Hopkins University, in a 2005 essay: A fundamental conclusion of the new physics also acknowledges that the observer creates the reality. Pioneering physicist sir James Jeans wrote

"The stream of knowledge is heading toward a non-mechanical reality; the universe begins to look more like a great thought than like a great machine. Mind no longer appears to be an accidental intruder into the realm of matter,

we ought rather to hail it as the creator and governor of the realm of matter. Get over it and accept the inarguable conclusion. The universe is immaterial-mental and spiritual."

I had help discovering how the universe works from Bob proctor, Aaron Doughty, YouTube channels YouAreCreators and Universe inside you, Bruce Lipton, The Placebo effect, No Cebo Effect, Mandala effect, butterfly

effect, bystander effect, the documentary on Netflix called "The secret", visual and audio hallucinations, The MasterMind Principle, police report eye witnesses having different stories, experiments, etc and

It

seems the mandala effect is that whatever current frequencies controlling the majority also change history for example according to thousands of people the bible used to say that sampson's girl cut his hair but now with new

controlling frequencies it now says that she had a slave cut his hair to take his power away. This relates to a recent story i heard where the recent President Trump paid his lawyer take the blame for writing something on Trumps twitter account.

I found Dr. Royal Raymond Rife's frequency list and it is over 437 pages long and the first 8 or so is the University studies and then every health problem we can possibly have and what frequency or frequencies cure that problem.

The cancer section is 3 pages long. I seen AIDS on the list and every body part we have and or metabolism for example the frequency and or frequencies that help them normalize to perfect functionality. Also i do teach for world peace, immortality or whatever else to improve life for anyone because i care for everyone but affirmations, subliminals and frequencies takes some time of listening because

they have to push back opposing frequencies like being under a foot or more of water the deeper you go then the more pressure you feel so this is why certain affirmations, subliminals and frequencies seem to take longer

to come true but please trust me i have no reason to lie, someone said something like frequencies are like seeds that you plant they may not produce fruit right away but if you water that seed then eventually it will produce fruit and they were referring to saying the affirmation long enough to get results.

Before i got benefits from starting this journey i did not even think of the concept of how the universe works but i have really put a lot of thought into explaining anything and everything in the universe to get a better understanding of how all of it works.

I plan on changing my eye color to gold to prove it to for friends, family and anyone else because after teaching hundreds of people i have noticed most are cynical and deny anything based off a belief system they have but belief is only a guide to the truth as i see it now, this is why

i could not trust religion i knew it was not me to try believing in something that seemed so made up. So i searched over 5 years learning from many teachers, hypnosis, scientific explanations and more for a variety of questions i had about life constantly thinking of new questions and eventually started enjoying learning along the way then i learned about how the universe works, so i then

started experimenting with the law of attraction, subliminals, affirmations and frequencies to prove for myself if they have complete control or not and so far every

affirmation, subliminal, frequency etc i listen to enough gives me the results i wanted so now my focus is to teach and get this information out there because i want to help people and bring world peace i already sent it to the governor of nebraska and washington but they obviously didn't bring world peace yet so i will share my message

in this video instead of in comments section of many videos to make a difference in the world. I have already started listening and saying my own world peace affirmations and subliminals to help protect myself for when

I am ready to share the truth. I only teach what i have proven through experimenting with hundreds of frequencies, subliminals and affirmations. I am working on perfecting myself in everything that i do or say with great patience.

I was listening to different frequencies on 11 tabs on YouTube before they made Anthony Sommer add in the evil 440Hz in his music after 6 frequencies like stem cell production, collagen production, etc then I felt the different energy centers in me filling up then I would feel a

Slight discomfort that went away after switching to another frequency then after the 7th frequency I felt it all in more detail, it only creates the weird feeling because I was filling up

smaller chakras/energy centers within 20 minutes then it had to use energy to distribute energy to our energy centers nearby. The 9 solfeggio frequencies fill up our 9 biggest chakras so it gives more time to distribute energy so you won't feel the slight discomfort. Aaron doughty taught

me an affirmation "i am whole and complete," it means that i do not need anyone or anything to fulfill me or to complete me, i simply relax and focus on what i need to focus on then time flys by faster so i set alarms on my phone for certain things like when i need to get things done or when i get off work.

I read and heard many stories of how people can change hair texture and or eye colors to whatever they want with subliminals and affirmations but i simply have not wanted to change my body in those ways besides being invincible, immortal, healthy, wise and or anything else to improve the quality of my life.

At www.spooky2rife.com they have frequencies with proven results from 10 different researchers and they say it is the biggest frequency database in the world. 144.72hz woke me up when i was so tired i couldn't stay awake any longer then i got back to work at full speed, i was about to clock out of work 3 hours early but then found this frequency on that site next to energy and vitality.

I should inform you that the cells in our body can be addicted to anything and that Rockefeller studied how Hitler had control over people and found that fluoride in the water and toothpaste was one way because it calcified the pineal gland, closing up our perception and stifles

Creativity and with 440Hz set as the official standard of tuning for America and Europe. 440Hz is the frequency "Humans are bad and need punishment" so when anyone listen to almost any music then that frequency grows from

inside you like a bubble constantly growing until it meets an opposing frequency because the Mastermind Principle explains how opposing frequencies cannot exist in the same area, so opposing frequencies go to war

until one survives in whatever area, the bubbles probably follow us wherever we go if we created it. So this is why people get so angry because even if they do not listen themselves other people do listen enough that the frequency bubble could be all the way out to Jupiter or Pluto.

So I use Fluoride free toothpaste, aluminum free deodorant, purified drinking water, 24/7 affirmations and the nine Solfeggio Frequencies I also avoid Television or sometimes called "Tell Lie Vision" because it tells you lies. I also avoid listening to music other than the nine Solfeggio Frequencies.

So it is important to learn consciously how to counter balance this problem. The nine solfeggio frequencies, subliminals and affirmations help and also learning to be like water, for example as water flows through life down the river it does not stop before hitting a rock, it simply goes over and or around the rock, practice makes perfect also we need to change the standard of tuning for all music.

I heard once "if you think about nothing then you become nothing." I think that once the affirmation etc becomes permanent then it becomes like your identity so if being immortal is one of your affirmations then it would not matter

if you think about nothing since you are immortal. I've heard of a story I think it only took 4,000 people to meditate on world peace for it to come true all around the world during the meditation but affirmations can do the same!

Please use this knowledge for the greater good of all it helps if you write down affirmations and put it on something you do daily like taping it to the middle of the tv

so you read it daily before watching tv or on a doorknob etc please include "There is peace throughout all time and space now and peace will always be here and everywhere" Please share this message everywhere you can on all social media accounts and in person you can summarize this and or show them this message.

For the disbelievers, not trying to be rude because someone said this to me once I looked up the definition and you should to but they were right so my perspective changed.

You are cynical and you have no right to tell me what you think negatively without doing the work to prove me wrong. I put years into my experimenting with about a hundred affirmations and scientific explanations that's why I

can explain anything and everything in the universe. I'm authentic I can't only believe in anything I hear so I search for proof and then prove it true or not with a variety of ways.

I share the truth. I'm not insulting you but simply informing you of the behavior your displaying. Experience and proof always win rather than thoughts and beliefs.

The frequencies constantly fill up your energy centers but some

are good some are bad like an opera singer break glass with her voice. That energy is probably used for survival first then healing, then perfect health our body knows how

to use the energy then once you have healed up and healthy then the energy fills up faster because it takes less energy to maintain health than to become healthy and then you feel great all the time but you still got to keep listening to the frequencies all day everyday until your

full then I think you can listen to higher frequencies but I haven't got there yet like 10,000 Hz but frequencies research is still happening so make sure whatever you listen

to is beneficial to you and others around you because 10,000 hz hurt my back for months until I realized it was causing the pain probably because I needed to fill up on the nine solfeggio first before upgrading further. Beliefs can make anything reality so anything can be true but I know the highest truth and here I share with you.

I'm giving you the highest truth so now is the time to use this knowledge I offer tested and proven so everyone will be peaceful if I get enough of you to listen, think and or say

these affirmations, "Everyone and everything is immortal, There is peace throughout all time and space, everyone feels unconditional love for everyone and everything, everyone is happy" and more repeat all day everyday for faster

results please, We see life through the lens of our belief so I try to wake people up with a variety of experiments, related famous people quotes, scientific explanations, etc

I'm currently doing 2 more experiments for no sleep affirmations and no food for a month or longer, when I get hungry I simply think, "I don't need food to survive and thrive" about 5-10 times then I'm not hungry again for many

hours then repeat when hungry. If I feel discomfort then I think, "I feel great" about 5-10 times then it becomes true. Beliefs make anything reality, make anything true but belief is harder to control consciously but with affirmations you think or say exactly what you want a few times

then it becomes reality, some things take longer because people around you operate on opposing frequencies. If we have more people think or say the affirmations then the

Faster they come true or possibly might take a few people just to make certain affirmations come true like "everyone is immortal" this affirmation probably has the most people operating on an opposite frequency because even spiritual people believe they are meant to die.

Proof and experience always win rather than thoughts and beliefs. When I first heard about affirmations I didn't believe they would work, I ignored them until I found a video by YouAreCreators called "the secrets of frequency and

vibrations" talking about how the nine solfeggio frequencies cured the worst cancer within 70 days for 16 terminally ill cancer patients which sounded more scientific proven due to me remembering an opera singer breaking glass with her voice so I figured there could be good

and bad frequencies for people to and I was right. YouAreCreators put frequencies with affirmations so I decided I can try both at the same time thinking only frequencies would benefit me but they both gave me many

benefits, every affirmation came true after about 2 and a half weeks listening about 24/7 and I started waking up with

this extremely blissful feeling everyday, super happy, infinite energy, thinking faster, better memory, processing information faster and working like I was on an adrenaline rush all day everyday but before the adrenaline rush only last about 5 minutes a day.

Many experiments feeding rabbits equal amounts of fat makes them 60% fatter except the ones that were getting petted and loved they were healthy. Split a pile of rice in 2 talk negative to one pile then positive to the other overtime positive will look better but negative will be completely black. Or with plants growing, same thing.

How do drugs like marijuana affect my Aura and energies? And how can I recharge or reinvigorate my energies?

This Awareness indicates that this plant, that known as marijuana, is in fact, a teacher plant, that which is known as a plant that can have an effect on one who has ingested it. That this particular plant is seen to create an opening in one’s waking consciousness wherein higher perceptual awareness is activated. Thus, entities may become more psychically and spiritually aware.

That this plant can have the effect upon humans wherein it opens one’s inner consciousness to those higher vibrations and octaves of a divine nature or frequency, often causing one to enter into that cosmic level known as higher self-realization.

This Awareness indicates that entities would benefit greatly in developing a clear understanding of the essence and effects of certain plants, drugs and chemicals. That when the aura is in a weakened state, there is much potential for that which is known as possession or negative thought-form or astral attacks.

That when an entity is in a weakened state, that this is when those attacks mostly occur. Thus, when an entity is ingesting large amounts of that which is known as the teacher plant, that of marijuana, that this particular plant as being that which is least destructive to the entity’s aura.

Wherein, other drugs such as alcohol, may have a more destructive effect on one’s aura, often blasting holes in one’s auric layers, creating even greater weakness and vulnerability to those astral or energetic attacks. That in general, that of alcohol expresses more of a depressant effect whereas, that of marijuana produces that of a more euphoric or positive effect.

This Awareness indicates much of the perceptual effect depends upon each entity’s individual preferences, attitudes, beliefs and purposes in using such plants or drugs. That there are many methods of restoring and to reenergize one’s energies when one chooses to stop using such plants or drugs.

That there is seen the concept of fasting in order to remove such residual chemicals and energies from one’s bodily functions, wherein such herbs as comfrey or chamomile or peppermint are consumed, that this appears to be of a general effect in removing such residual effects. That also lemon juice appears as effective in removing such toxins and poisons.

Technically it's fasting without being hungry if you use Affirmations, I think " I don't need food to survive, I don't need food to thrive, I feel great" between 5-15 times then hunger pains go away, if I repeat more then it lasts longer that I don't need food. I have had no food for 7 days now and I have started noticing that all of my abilities are improving like hearing and feeling better etc.

Hence, the action of fasting is seen wherein one’s cellular structures begin to hunger for that residue, that drug, that plant’s chemical and in that hunger, attempts to open wider and wider in an effort to absorb energy.

Whereby, in that process of yearning and moving towards each other, the old residues remaining within the cells begin to move into the elimination process and out of the bodily functions, creating a cleansing effect. That this can take approximately a few weeks to a few months, depending upon each individual’s personal expressions and habits.

That also there is seen the ingesting of fresh water and the consumption of only proper foods of a healthy nature. That also exercise appears as a form of internal cleansing. That also walking in nature or by large bodies of water may have a beneficial effect upon the entity in need of such cleansing.

This Awareness indicates that another important method of toxin removal is seen as simply restricting one’s intake of this plant and refusing to ingest any amount of it. That this method appears as one of the best methods to removing this plant’s residual waste products from one’s body, this being seen to take an average of 3 weeks to 3 months or longer, depending upon each entity’s daily intake.

That some entities may only need a few weeks of cleansing, while others may need a longer period of time in order to attain that perfect state of health.

I've learned from the best then figured the highest truth out myself through experimenting with all knowledge this world had to offer I literally focused only on self improvement and figuring out all the details piecing all the

pieces together for an all inclusive explanation. Don't act like I couldn't figure out the highest truth just because you didn't discover or experiment like I have. Go big or go home that's my motto. I know 100% what I'm talking about

without a doubt because I was fully dedicated to figuring this out since I barely talk to anyone due to me being shy because my empathic abilities are stronger than most but if you think not then ask some questions I can answer any question with truth.

honestly people worship many things with over 2,000 religions your choice to believe in that caused your experiences from my experience current controlling frequencies change the past and it seems because I was determined to find the highest truth after experimenting then

I found it like that quantum physics picture you sent me explains how I'm right. I experiment to prove what I believe to be true to ensure I have the highest truth, have you read my full message at the top of my facebook page pinned to the top? Not the bio but the top post

We can't rely on anyone to give you all your knowledge or you limit everything about yourself. Use discernment carefully, none have the right to deny the highest truth without putting in the work to prove it true or not using the information from the one who knows the highest truth which is me.

There is ego, basically it's like selfish only cares for what it wants and thinks it's always right because technically it is right because beliefs create reality but knowing beliefs create reality can enlighten you but only if you know it as fact like me. Affirmations make anything reality. Wake up obviously your ego has taken over to be so unknowing about life yet think your truth is the highest truth

Does not matter if they all lie because I have used many methods to prove what I have figured out, have you not read my top pinned facebook post with all my experiments? I only refer to other people, quotes, scientific explanations, etc if it aligns with what I have proven that's why I have insight into things you have never heard of.

I'm a man, we all need to grow our hair out never cutting, trimming or waxing because after 3 years we get all enhanced abilities and they enhance more overtime.

I accidentally grew my hair to long and got all enhanced abilities that's how I figured it out, I was playing soccer every week then one day all my abilities improved double and

it was so cool but I was soaked in sweat had to keep drying my face to protect my eyes using my shirt but then it was soaked and I never ran out of energy it was so cool so that night I was like now I need to cut my hair because it traps heat make me sweaty but then I thought wait maybe

my hair gave me the abilities so I searched google "why should I grow out my hair" and found many experiments by the US army talking about how they were hiring Native American Indian trackers for their unique tracking skills and so the younger ones joined for money but forced to cut

their hair then the army said why did you lose your ability and they said "my dad says we get our power from our hair" so they had 10,000 takes like 10 different types of tests with their hair and they did great on everyone of them.

The army would try sneaking up on them while sleeping and the indians would wake up before danger got close and got away and they did hand to hand combat with the best of the army but due to their faster reaction speed they

beat the army every time and more tests but they got the 2 people with the highest scores to redo every test but one had to cut their hair so they did and after the haircut he scored some of the lowest scores of everyone who took the test and the guy who kept his hair kept his scores really high!

By teaching so many I continue to learn new ways to convince people I'm right except for the stubborn that think they know part or all of the highest truth, if think your

cup is full meaning you think you know the highest truth and don't make room to question your own beliefs then you have accepted a lie blindly.

We have many cups but the cup of knowledge must save room to question everything to find the highest truth

My mom said believe in whatever you want but I have gone to church for a while but I always knew to take religions as a guide yes learn from them but don't be to focused on one religion I've learned from Sevan Bomar who read every religion 3 times but I knew I had to look deeper from all teachers.

My boss once told me I had to stop teaching people while I work so I asked myself later why do I need to teach this anyway (trying to cope with that hard decision) then

right away a voice came in my head and said something like "you need to share the truth for world peace, that's why I created over 330 million species so we can hear all the different healing sounds but now we have separated from nature."

Currently I listen to world peace, immortality, no sleep affirmations in my playlist I made it way shorter to get results faster but I say, "I don't need sleep, water or food" but I still drink some water because I want to mainly focus on no food or sleep due to me sharing my message all day. Also think "I feel great and I am healthy"

It seems we need to focus on only a few affirmations at a time because if you listen to a hundred different affirmations then you only give each a little energy daily which might not be enough to make it true

The difference from being in higher and lower vibrations, some are like I get angry when blah blah but happy when blah so technically they don't operate at the same time so that's how they can both be inside you but in different parts

of the body. This is why we need Aaron Doughty's help to learn how to maintain higher vibrations. That's why I'm no longer angry in times I would get angry, feel peaceful, unconditional love like being able to really trust myself and

the universe it's all good and important because affirmations only work if you say the affirmation like a million times a day instead it's better to learn consciously how to stay on those really high vibrational states of being.

Scientist had a group of people hooked up to machines to measure emotions and had them watch a slide show of random pictures but some were babies or evil related and they found that the brain responded to each picture 8 seconds before they seen it. This shows how the higher self tries to prepare us for the future.

Your higher self basically lives a hundred years all instantly every moment using what knowledge you have at the time but due to this you will experience things that you will eventually understand because you learn about it later in life and believe it to be true later in life.

Bruce Lee said to watch words that is why its called spelling

Think, say and or listen to affirmations subliminals frequencies and mantras for, "I have 100,000 dollars" the more

often you repeat then the faster you get the money.

The energy of "I have 100,000 dollars" will expand outward from you every time you repeat "I have 100,000 dollars" literally mind controlling people to give you money I got 6 people trying to send me money now.

I heard of this experiment they volunteer for that gay people have sex with women but either stay gay or become bisexual so I think it proves gay people are meant to be in the world but I only am attracted to women. Also the only thing repeated twice in the bible is "Ye are gods"

Affirmations subliminals frequencies and or mantras work for everyone because they work with energy. If you change something physical with physical things then the problem will manifest in a different way, it works through subconscious fears.

I did some research though in the library of congress they have 15,000 legit research places send results of marijuana experimenting and they concluded that there are

no negative side effects of marijuana use they said if your pregnant though don't smoke because the babies lungs are still forming so I used to smoke but once I reached enlightenment I realized marijuana has a lower vibration

than enlightenment on David R Hawkins scale somewhere from fear many between til enlightenment so I decided to quit the little use I used to do completely and then after about a week then I started feeling great to rise up to the vibrational level that my knowledge is at.

Aaron Doughty on YouTube helped me reach enlightenment, every vibration has an ego difficult to get past without Aaron Doughty

I could listen to music any kind but I always didn't really like most of it and I later found out why, Hitler also used 440Hz to control people and now it is the official standard

of tuning for America and Europe that frequency basically is "Humans are bad and need punishment" this is why violence is in big cities because many people listen to that and get brainwashed without even knowing it

Just like they claim God has spoken us into existence, Affirmations, subliminals, frequencies and mantras make anything reality, for example, "I am happy" will make you happy once said enough times but if you say, "I want to be happy" then you will simply want to be happy. Basically you get what you say, think, believe, etc.

Remember some affirmations come true faster than others because of the Mastermind principle, for example people don't eat all day long but people do believe all day long that they will not live forever so that's why require no food affirmations will come true faster than I am immortal affirmations.

Some affirmations come true faster than others because people emit frequencies while they operate on them

Since we use energy even when the affirmations are true we should continue the affirmations to keep them true or we will use up all the energy then it is no longer true unless you continue the affirmations

when I say affirmations for example "I am Happy" then I create energy to be happy but the affirmation needs to be repeated enough times within a certain amount of time to continue accumulating enough energy to become true

The only bible verse repeated twice is "Ye Are Gods" we can change anything with Affirmations, subliminals mantras and the nine solfeggio frequencies, I have figured

out how to make anything reality and how the universe works after experimenting with hundreds of Affirmations, subliminals, the mantras and the nine solfeggio frequencies.

There is simply energy and energy can be used anyway we choose, I've used subliminals and mantras to become attractive to make people attracted to me that didn't even notice me for a year but that day everyone was smiling at me,

flirting with me, showing off their best achievements and giving me phone numbers, read my top pinned facebook post and all of my comments on it because I've put years of research and hundreds of experimenting into it even after figuring out how to make anything reality and how the universe works

Loop the video by clicking and holding on it while on the desktop version it will say loop click it then if on it then it shows check mark by the loop option then make it full screen then open up wifi settings to get the looped video to go to small screen so you can do other things on your device while you listen to the subliminals

[thenexusofsouls]

9) Which of your muses do you identify with the most? Why?

{i am the caretaker of souls} So I actually answered a very similar question a while back, so I’ll just re-tweak my answer a bit because it hasn’t changed much. Of all the muses I write, this might surprise you... XD

Welp… time to get super embarrassing, haha. Honestly the muse I identify with the most out of all the ones I have on this blog and others is… Tony Stark. Now, I am not a genius, or a billionaire. I know nothing about robotics, very little about physics, and next to nothing about nanotechnology other than what the Metal Gear Solid series taught me (I’m in environmental microbiology, so that’s a completely different field). However, at a core human level, Tony and I have several things in common. All negative, heh. I’ll share the process of how Tony became a muse for me, even though it’s sort of an embarrassing one for me, because I find it interesting on a psychological level. The majority of my muses I wanted to write either because I thought they deserved better and wanted to move beyond and improve upon what their canon material did for/with them, or because I was moved by their story, personality, or another quality they possess. But I never wanted to write Tony. Up until recently, I didn’t even like him.

So… I had never watched the Iron Man movies at first. I saw all the Avengers and Captain America movies, even Captain Marvel, a couple Thor movies, Black Panther and the Guardians of the Galaxy movies are next on my list of ones to catch up on. Anyway, I always hated Tony. I thought he was a shallow, crass, arrogant asshole who only cared about himself. I really disliked him almost to the point of hate, and to be frank, I ignored him out of dislike or lack of interest the majority of the time when watching Marvel movies. Really loving characters like Wanda and Vision from the comics and coming to love Pietro in the movies didn’t help, because there’s a lot of anti-Tony sentiment there and bad history between them, or at least misunderstanding. But then I thought okay, this is a major part of the franchise that I’m missing, and I should just watch these movies and get them over with, for the sake of being thorough and informed.

The first Iron Man was okay. Good story. Learned a lotta stuff about him I didn’t know. He was never a character I read in the comics, so I’m not familiar with him outside of MCU. Then I watched Iron Man 2 and I hated it. But Natasha was in it, so… score. Then I watched Iron Man 3… and I had exactly five panic attacks… and my perception of Tony completely changed.

I have chronic anxiety. It manifests mostly as social anxiety, a fear of loss of control, a fear of public embarrassment, mild germophobia (an interesting thing for a microbiologist to have, but hey sure why not), and something called catastrophizing, whereby I fret, worry, mull, and stress over every possible worst case scenario and poor outcome to a situation and anything even remotely bad that could happen to me in the foreseeable future. It wastes a lot of psychic energy, lemme tell you, and if it gets bad enough, I have panic attacks. Before I saw Iron Man 3, I never considered myself a person who could be triggered by anything. I’m going with the actual real definition of triggering here, as in resulting in a panic attack, flashback, or other severe psychological reaction to something. Sure, I have topics or visual imagery that upsets me. I think everyone does to some extent. But I was never triggered by anything and never thought I could be. Apparently, I was wrong.

After watching Iron Man 3 for the first time and having five panic attacks over two hours (I average maybe one or two a month... and I’m defining a panic attack as elevated heart rate, sweating, ringing ears, tingling feeling in my scalp, sometimes tears, hands shaking, feeling cold all over, teeth chattering, and a feeling of urgency or hyper awareness), I was more fascinated than upset, honestly. Panic attacks are a weird thing for me because very often I will feel rational and calm mentally but my body is going haywire, so I’m sitting here watching this movie like… why is this bothering me? I was obviously bothered, but I didn’t know why.

So I asked a friend of mine who had gone to school for psychology, and he asked well, when did they happen? I don’t remember all of them, but for example, they occurred during the scene where Tony has a nightmare and Pepper basically calls him immature and leaves him despite the fact that he’s begging her to stay. And then again when he has a panic attack while driving and has to stop driving. And then again when that little boy kept pressing him like, “Are you on medication? Should you be? Are you upset? Are you panicking? What are you going to do now?” and he just wouldn’t stop and Tony kept getting more and more panicky.

I have always been a very empathetic person, whether I wanted to be or not. I see those starving children and abused animals on those TV commercials and I cry every time. I watch movies and cry because I see other people crying. It’s terrible. Well, apparently, my friend thought that I was empathizing with Tony during moments when he was the most not okay, and that was triggering my own anxiety. When Tony would have a panic attack, I would. When he would lose control of a situation, I would panic about it myself. When the coping mechanisms and carefully constructed social façade fell and he was actually genuine with someone only to be rejected harshly, it upset me immensely and triggered another attack. It made a lot of sense to me… both my own anxiety and my empathy coming together to both sympathize with and be triggered by this character who has some very severe mental health issues.

From that moment on, I saw Tony differently. I went back and re-watched the Avengers movies, the Captain America movies… and I was able to see him in a completely different light. Looking through the lens of my own struggles with anxiety, coping mechanisms, and trying to look and act normal when I’m not okay because being perceived as not okay is like death, I suddenly realized that I understood Tony a lot more than I ever wanted to, heh. It was shortly after that that I realized he’d become a muse for me, when I couldn’t stop thinking about and analyzing and teasing apart the mess that is his psychology and making sense of it… which is easier for me to do than I ever would have expected.

I don’t have a nice neatly wrapped ending to this rant, except to say that Tony was a muse I never expected to have, but now I am so protective of him (and don’t ship him with Pepper because reasons) and I have really come to love writing him. He definitely is the muse I relate to the most on THIS blog. On ALL blogs, I think that would probably still hold, with Wanda Maximoff being a close second.

[xsecretblastsx]

1x13 - The thin line between Chuck and Nate

That’s a really long tittle for an episode. I wasn’t planning on doing this recap today, but I’m anxious and I needed some distraction, and so here we are.

This is quite the episode. I apologize in advance about the length of this recap. So here we go.

Thougths i had while watching the episode:

Not that it can be forgotten but the opening scene of this episode is such a reminder of how stalkerish the gossip girl site is

I had totally forgot about Jenny, like now that I think about it I didn’t even notice she wasn’t on the last couple of episodes, wow.

I actually laughed at Dan’s and Rufus stunned silence.

Somehow Dan I don’t believe you love Serena, I believe you think so, but that’s not the same as actually loving someone.

I’m not expert in the Queen bee and her clique hierarchy, but it’s says a lot about her that Jenny actually tries to stand up herself, like if you think about it she’s a freshman, and not even from the UES and she’s already really set on stating her place. 

Plot twist: the test was for Blair, dun dun dun

We have seen it before, but this is the first time we actually start to see the extent of Blair’s ability for going into denial mode, and Serena explains it masterfully, so much that “the movie playing in Blair’s head about her life” it’s something I’ve seen a lot since I first watched this show to describe some of Blair’s anticts through the show.

Maybe I’am a total bitch, have you thougth about that? It’s one my fave Blair’s lines.

Blair and Nate having a nice cute moment, while Chuck watches in the shadows, and Blair is just like sorry not sorry, auch.

I honestly don’t understand why Jenny is so surprised Blair is never going to really like her, like she said she has spend the last six months on it, being a minion, what did she expect, Blair is not nice, and that comes across, like two minutes after meeting her.

I love Serena’s gold coat, not that I blame her, but she gave up really fast.

Like even ignoring the fact that Jenny was eavesdropping, I’m not a fan of Serena telling Dan that, at least not the Blair part.

Jenny’s face is like “wow this is the gossip of the decade” hilarious.

Serena saying “he does have a this weird influence over her” is a very telling line about them. 

I’ve realized that while I like his characters, Rufus storylines are really boring when they are not related to Lily.

Chuck’s outfts in S1 were something else, not in a good way. 

Serena being all like damn, had I known that I wouldn’t have told you this. I feel bad or fher, because It’s one of those cases were having good intentios and helping your friends actually makes everything worse. 

“I command myself not to be pregnant” have I’ve mentioned I love Blair?

“I would have no idea what to wear to a paternity hearing” this line would never be hilarious, and Serena if it wasn’t for pre natal DNA tests, you probably would have picked that outif.

“So goodbye mistake, so far in my past I can hardly remember” that was harsh Blair, and I’m not justifying what Chuck does next, but I’ve always felt that for knowing him like she did, it was naive of her to believe he wouldn’t retaliate.

That scene of Blair waliking down the stairs while everyone gossips about her is so well done, the visuals, the voices around her, you really feel it, and feel for her.

Jenny spilling the beans to Nate, really steppingi in the game now.

That was a fight that was a long time coming since 1x07, and I love this scene, it’s interesting that Nate is mad, and probably hurt, and yet is Chuck the one that looks really hurt by it in the end of the scene.

Again, I understand why Nate is mad, but considering he actually cheated on Blair with Serena, he cames across as being a really hypocrite in his fight with Blair.

I love Serena, but she’s like immediately jumping on Dan and Jenny’s defence, without even really listening to Blair, not trying to understand why she’s upset. Of course Blair being Blair retaliates, but on this case she’s actually not wrong in what she says to Serena, it’s just brutally honest.

I loved the stand off’s between Blair and Jenny, they’re epic. As of now, Jenny 1, Blair 0.

I really love Serena’s outfit this episode.

No Dan! You don’t get to dictate when and if someone tells you they love you back, Like sorry, but putting that pressure on someone is not okay at all. Storming out in anger, is just... wrong.

That scene of Blair just wandering the streets, reminiscing about Nate and Chuck is so sad, and it’s probs also the first time since Cotillion, that she allows herselft to think on the fact that she has feelings for Chuck too. 

I like to mention that the Nate memory is a heartbreaking moment in their history, she’s crying. Her Chuck memory in the other hand is the moment that started it all, and exciting moment. The difference.  Great choice of music by the way.

One of my favorite aspects of S1 were the heart to heart convos between Serena and Eric. He’s such a wise kid.

What’s with Chuck’s outfits this episode. I hate that sweater. 

This scene is so hard to watch, Chuck’s words to Blair are horrible, so much that it’s hard to remember why he’s so mad and hurt, so one is like f*ck you Chuck,  and the way Blair reacts, and how hurt she is by his words, makes it easy to forget that she had dismissed his feelings, treated him like her dirty little secret and called him a mistake. 

Blari and her mom having a moment, always gets to me.

I love that scene between the girls of the steps and Jenny, you can really see her becoming a mean girl, and it gets even better when Penelope says “Blair trained you well��, cause this Jenny in many ways is indeed a Blair creation. 

“I love you because you make no apologies for being exactly who you are” Sorry Dan but I don’t believe you when you say that.

This is one of my favorite Serena and Blair moments ever,  No matter what they have each other, and have a lot of love between them, even if they forget about it from time to time.

So.. what an episode. People mostly remember it as the episode where the love triangle between Nate-Blair-Chuck explodes, but it’s also the episode that really puts Jenny in the road to Queen B, there’s also a lot about Blair and Serena’s friendship and it’s the episode where Dan and Serena say I love you to each other, quite the ride in plots. I’ll save my thougths on Jenny for the next episodes because if I remember correctly those focus a lot on her Blair and the road to queendom.

This is suposed to be a sweet episode for Dan and Serena, and for the most part it is, they’re there for each other, have cute dates, and Dan’s struggle to say I love you to Serana it’s almost endearing and then it comes to the moment Dan manages to sayI love you, and Serena doesn’t say it back. It’s obviously a distressing moment to say the words and not get them back, and I get it can be particularly difficult for Dan because he sees Serena as a girl that it’s so out of his league that really, why would she love him. And yet I hate his reaction. He storms out in anger, and tells her how is not okay for her to react that way. I guess I wouldn’t have much of an issue (i’m actually pretty sure I didn’t think much of it the first time I watched this) if I didn’t knew that he always reacts badly when Serena doesn’t act like he wants her to. 

I loved the fact that the show, makes a point to establish why Serena has a difficult time with the words I love you, her little talk with Eric was so nice because like the last episode references the way Lily’s chaotic love life damaged her children. I do wish we spend a bit more time on this issues, because I feel having Serena said I love you to Dan right back after his “this is why i love you speech” (which by the way sound hollow given what I’ve already know) it was a tad to soon and it cheapens a bit her difficulties, like if they were easy to get over, and not something that she has to work through, I would have prefered if her I love you came some episodes later, not necesarilly after dramatic struggling that’s not Serena, but rather after her realizing she can trust Dan and seeing for herself he loves her (I know, i know).

Now, the pregnancy scare, the way this episode flows is really good, it keeps you on your seat and starting out with the little plot twist about the pregnancy not being for Serena and instead is for Blair really sets the tone. I love how from the very beginning it shows how Serena is there for Blair, how she takes the bullet for her by gettingh photographed buying the test, it also shows how really well she know Blair, the line a about Blair living in the movie in her head is so good, we learn more about Blair and how it falls on Serena to help her deal with reality. When the shit hits the fan, Blair lashes against Serena, and this is the kind of situation where I can see where Blair’s coming from particularly when Serena defends Dan and Jenny, because to Blair she’s putting them above her, and the fact that Serena trusted in them and defends that trust hurts, Serena doesn’t seem to understand at first why Blair sees this scandal as the end of the world, and when Blair’s points out that she doesn’t get it because things are different for Serena and she already ruined her reputation, Serena gets offended, and I get it, Blair was recalling a part of Serena’s life she had left behind, and she doesn’t need the reminder, so she leaves. 

It does ironically proves Blair point, because at the start of the episode yes people talk about Serena, but when she says she’s not pregnant, everyone’s like ok whatever, the girls on the steps are like great let’s get drinks to celebrates, Blair on the other hand get’s dethroned for the same pregnancy scare and for sleeping with two guys... the consequences are not the same for the both of them, and Serena doesn’t understands it at first and reacts to Blair’s meltdown like Blair just being Blair, when she finally gets it she goes after her and convinces her to stay and not run away, giving us one of the nicest scenes of their friendship, their bond and their love for each other.

Another interesting bit about the episode is how we see Serena trying and tyring to help Blair one way or the other, she tries so hard that she makes questionable decisions that in the long run actually have undesirable consequences, however this only happens because Blair keeps being so obnoxious about it, and if  she hadn’t been in complete denial Serena wouldn’t have talked about with Dan and Chuck, which ends up with the whole affair exposed. This is a pattern that repeats during the whole episode having Blair  pushing and pushing people to the limits of their tolerance . We see Blair going over Jenny in full Queen B mode, whichs mades Jenny snap, tired about it and ends up with her telling Nate the whole truth. Same with Chuck,  this episode she actually refers to him as a mistake she doesn’t even remember, and since she has  been very dismissive of his feelings so far, so he snaps and sends the tip to gossip girl. So we have Blair suffering the consequences of her actions, and the fact that the show does this, it’s the reason that no matter how bitchy or mean she gets, she always ends up having to deal with the results of that, which helps her grow in the long run and us love her.

Finally, the love triangle. So Nate and Blair 2.0 end up being very short lived. Now I’m not a fan of Nate this episode, mostly his treatment of Blair. He was a shitty boyfriend, who cheated on her with her best friend, not only that but the way he reveals it to her and continues to pine after Serena long after it, not breaking up with her mainly to help his father, and they actually broke up because he didn’t love her, so he’s real a hypocrite when he says “Guess when we were talking about leaving the past behind we were talking about yours, not mine” and it’s not the same, you cheated she didn’t, and yet he drops her without a second thought, not considering how forgiving she was of him in the past. So in that sense, good riddance Nate.

On the other hand, Nate’s anger with Chuck is justified, because like I said about the Serna and Nate hook up in redgards to Blair, girlfriends come and go, but friends are forever and you expect loyalty of them, and sure Blair and Nate had already broke up, but it’s not like you expect your best friend to hook up with your ex the minute the relationship is over. So i get, I do find interesting that Nate seems more angry than hurt with Chuck, and I think he doesn’t feel as hurt because he doesn’t really love Blair, and so his anger comes from the fact that he believes Chuck sleeping with Blair was just Chuck being Chuck, and he can’t quite believe it when Chuck ends up pointing out that  Nate ignored Blair and how instead he was actually there for her, and I feel this is part of the reason Chuck’s look so hurt at the end of their fight, because not only did Nate ends their friendship but he’s very dismissive and quite can’t believe that Chuck may have cared from Blair somewhat. 

That’s the scenario Blair walks into when she goes to talk to Chuck. He’s really hurt, because he not only lost his best  friend, the one person that he had always openly cared for, and he lost him because of the relationship he had with Blair, who had been nothing but dissmisive of him for quite some time now, who at best treated him as her dirtly little secret, even when he admitted to feel something and had nice details with her, like the necklace he gave her, he put himself out there as much as his emotinal stunned self could at that time and it was all for nothing, she saw him as nothing but a mistake.It’s not that I’m taking his side per se, but Season one it’s the one I do tend to think Blair had a bigger part in how things got to that point, in many ways she was mean to him just because, he was mostly reacting to her actions, the thing about Chuck though is that whenever Blair does something bad to him, he ends up retaliating 100 times worst. 

I feel he does this to level the ground between and end ups going overboard because it’s the way he takes control back over the situation, particularly in the first two seasons, when hasn’t come to terms completely with what he feels for her, he doesn’t know how to handle it on a good day, even less so when he hurts because of her. So on this episode what he says to her is horrible, he basically slut shames her, the whole episode is a tale about that, and that’s just awful, honestly had Chuck not said that I would be totally on his corner on this one, as it is I can’t and I just sigh in frustration. He was hurt yes, but he ends up hurting Blair as badly if not more, for all her witty combacks and bitchiness she halts, not able to say anything back and she just looks so hurt, to the point that she ends up in her mother’s arm crying and wanting out, and sure it’s the combination of everything that want’s her to go away, but it’s Chuck’s words that put her over the edge because she wasn’t expecting that from him,before all of this they were partners in crime, friends in a weird way different from their friendship with Serena and Nate and also because she’s suprised it actually hurts her that much.

Here’s the thing, my own “theory” on this, when I did the recap for 1x07 I’ve mentioned this is the moment he realizes he’s in love with ther, he may not go as far as to called it that, but he know he feels something, being probably lowkey feeling it for quite sometime, and that to him is monumental. That’s Chuck’s moment. This episode to me is Blair’s moment. When I think of the moment she realizes she is in love with him is either this, or in that week before S2. But I’m way more inclined to believe it’s this one, when he breaks her heart. Especially because she breaks up again with Nate this same episode at a point when she believed the best of their relationship is yet to come, and she doesn’t seem as bad after talikng to him as she did after talking to Chuck. I also believe this because like I mentioned earlier in the scene when she thinks about both of them, she thinks of Nate in one of their saddest moment, when basically Nate says you either let go of the fact I cheated on you, or we end this, and when she thinks of Chuck she remembers their time in the limo, it’s an interesting contrast almost as if her subconcious was telling her, forget Nate that ended up a long time ago, what happened with Chuck however was amazing, do you really want to give it up? And it’s after that scene that she goes looking for him, only to find out, he doesn’t want her anymore. I also feels it paints a  kind of interesting contradiction, Chuck realizes he loves her on such a incredibly happy moment, she realizes she loves him in a really sad moment, like oh shit! I’m in love with Chuck Bass, and it fits with the star of the story, he’s after all the one that goes after her first, and truth is, since that day he never really let’s her go.

Random bits I’ve noticed:

This was filmed in december, that scene where Serena is telling Dan that she’s not pregnant, behind them you can see a lot of poinsettias.

Blair’s wearing Jeans for a bit during this episode, that’s like sighting the yeti.

The song they used throught this episode but most notably in the scene where the blast about Blair reaches everyone is called “The Dark side of Indoor Track Meets” by Captiva, and the full song is weirdly interesting, like the last part of the song is really creepy. 

I love the song they used when Blairs is thinking about Nate and Chuck. It’s called “The air we breathe” by the figurines.

[vedj-f-bekuesu]

At this point I’m just watching the seasons to keep the momentum going after two great (and one flawed but still okay) seasons. With Friday being a Bank Holiday, I might get the rest of the pre-11 stuff wrapped up by the weekend. But enough of the future, how about the season I watched, Sons of Garmadon?

It had a lot to live up to based on its reputation, and I’m happy to report that it delivers on what it sets out to do. Issues with the season are fairly minor tribbles, but that’s something I can cover in the notes.

-Hoo boy, let’s get this out of the way; the movie did fucking wonders for Lloyd Garmadon. Spending like five seasons stuck to his blander “chosen one must learn” characterisation, this season gives him a very long overdue overhaul into a more modern chosen one protagonist who is way more entertaining to watch. Bonus points for having a look I can take seriously now...yeah, sorry, but the Anakin hairpiece with the strange approach to voice commitment never did for me, even as it became the norm for what I was viewing.  -To be honest, his teammates get some good material here too. Some more than others (Zane especially has a really good little arc where he gets to show his more calculating side. Cole’s arc is okay but I don’t feel it quite nails the landing as well), but they all get chance to banter and have character moments, which is mainly what I come into shows for as opposed to straight up development constantly. Shout outs to Jay who has small moments, but important ones that do really good for his character (I could go into why Lloyd and Jay make the most sense as leads...probably after my season watching is done). I also like the callback to a character moment he had in season 3. Also this finally feels like the writers are sticking to characterisation, this season mostly keeping what Hands of Time did with them. Not so much design-wise, but I’ve made it clear many times that I prefer the new designs to old. Also, I get to throw in Pixal as a main character now since she’s clearly on the team full time. She’s good here too. -The dynamics get their own section just because I want to restate how I prefer the dynamic between Jay and Lloyd compared to Kai and Lloyd so far. Seriously, Jay seems to step up to bat for Lloyd more than Kai at this point. And yet no-one really seems to be interested in it within the fandom. -There wasn’t really much in the way of side characters this season (I am aware that next season will change that). Misako was good for what little material she had, Wu was fun and actually became a solid character in his own right once he became a toddler, Dareth is solid and really gets to show his alternative way of helping out, and the police commissioner...eh, better than season 6 but I’m still not big on him.  -I can sum up Harumi in one sentence; Skylor but done better on every count (and also evil). She’s engaging when she’s acting as the more humble Princess figure, and she’s nicely hammy when she’s unleashing her evil side. I can see why people would be into Lloyrumi with such a investing act (for the record, I’m not). This all being said, those who say that Harumi had a point are missing one important detail; as much destruction has been caused with the ninjas’ close call; what alternative is there? I don’t see anyone else stepping up to save Ninjago so it would have probably fully fallen a long time ago. And even with the Great Devourer, Lord Garmadon was channelling his good side to deliver a finishing blow, he still needed the ninja there.  -We have three other villains and two of them are enjoyable. Ultra-Violet is committed to her crazy shtick and amusing, and Killow is definitely different to how I thought he’d be, but it’s a lot more enjoyable (especially when Garry Chalk is channelling every bit of his Sonic Underground Robotnik voice he can. Kind of like how Clancee was Ian James Corlett channelling a lot of his scrub monkey third class). Mr E can go rust though.  -Unlike the other seasons which people cite as dark, this one feels like it does actually go there. It’s not completely a dark season, mostly the end of Jade Princess and scenes between Game of Masks and Big Trouble, Little Ninjago. It was still pretty fun and light-ish hearted outside of that. -Weirdly enough, most of my quibbles are on the technical side. People cite this season as having the best animation...but I don’t really see it. In terms of visuals it’s a step up, but the actual animation doesn’t feel that different to Hands of Time. They learned to use flashier graphics everywhere. Which is probably why the intro is the way it is, and I’m sorry but this is probably my least favourite intro. I can’t appreciate the spectacle when focusing on anything is difficult to achieve. On top of that, there were still some glaring graphical fuck-ups (like when Cole is shown with the other ninja in a scene where he was captured, or when Lloyd was shown with green eyes in a shot despite being drained of power at that point), which aren’t really any different to the ones Prime Empire has.  -The pacing of the season wasn’t entirely smooth, but unlike other seasons it’s not like one set issue. It’s more like a concertina effect; it was very quick at first, then slows down, then speeds up again, then slows down, then finally hits an even tempo about halfway through. This is why I didn’t mention the likes of Hutchins, the parents or the Mechanic before; because of the pace, you don’t really get enough time to really get attached to them (doesn’t help that the Mechanic has Alan Marriott doing the voice in his cameo, and man does it not fit compared to Skybound. I’m glad when the Mechanic got more substantial stuff they went back to his original VA, that voice is so fun).  -My other big thing is actually the complete continuity snarl that’s Harumi’s backstory makes. They’ve thrown in so many random events over the seasons but because of the sheer vagueness of the timescales it doesn’t really break suspension of disbelief. But Harumi’s turn to darkness is clearly during the ending of season 1, which we have a much more tangible sense of time for. Harumi seems like she’s about 8-10 then, the ninja seem like they were 14-15 then, Harumi seems like she’s 15-18 now but the showrunner still insist that the ninja are teenagers? How does that work, the most generous allowance for time is five years, and that would barely make them still teenagers in season 8. Certainly don’t believe they could be teenagers as of the most recent seasons. -On a completely different tangent, can we talk about the toilet humour? Yeah, it’s not like it’s never been there (there’s been poop jokes, fart jokes, halitosis jokes, and who can forget that one utterly cringe scene in S3?), but Hands of Time and Sons of Garmadon do it in a way that just comes off as really weird compared to earlier toilet humour. Like, there’s the implication by Jay in season 7 that Kai has issues with constipation, Cole’s truth tea dose forces him to say that he pees in the pool, and then there’s Kai, right to Harumi’s face, all but saying that Jay has issues with peeing himself. Her reaction to it is fucking hilarious, but it’s still weird, even though knowing Vincent Tong he would totally do that. 

Overall, this was a great season, and it’s clear to see how this became such a draw to the series (meaning in hindsight, LEGO’s method of dealing with the new style was pretty much a winner). The issues I have don’t stop the quality being across the board. Aside from Possession, I think this may be a favourite season from the pre-11 stuff. 

Next time, we effectively get the second part to this story. Yep, it ended in a cliffhanger so we’ve hardly wrapped it up here. Time to see how the OG ninja and newer recruits handle themselves alone in Hunted. 

[faejilly]

ultimate top 10 sh moments/scenes 👀

ultimate? I am terrible at favorites/top 10′s nonny, this will not be ultimate, it will just be whatever 10 random things I thought up that I could manage words about 😅 In no order whatsoever, with numbers just so I don’t lose my place even more than usual:

10. May I start of by saying The Wedding? I generally skip fictional weddings, they make me uncomfortable. I mute them on TV (or pull out my phone to distract me if there are other people watching) and skim them in print, I find the entire concept of personalized vows mortifying, and I’m honestly delighted that most romances end at the engagment, because those are lovely and emotional. (I wasn’t even interested in my own wedding, and only actually arranged one because I knew the now husband didn’t just want to be engaged for fifty years *laughs*.) But I liked the flowers and the outfits (tho Magnus is not imo wearing a tuxedo, poor Alec) and the music and vows that were familiar rather than personal because ritual is important to them, being part of this setting that neither of them thought they’d ever have? I enjoyed it tremendously. Not an ultimate of anything, I suppose, but I liked it, which is all that matters. (It’s not where I wanted their relationship to be at that point, but it’s short-hand for where they’re going, which is the best possible scenario for a finale movie, tbqh.)

Engagements are about the couple, but weddings are about the community, and I felt like this did that visually, even if the actual ritual of the wedding makes no sense.

9. Parbatai sparring in uh… 2x11 I think it was. Sometimes the choreography in the show is a bit… weird, but they always did a good job with Jace & Alec and having the way they fought be character-full, having it show the strengths and weaknesses of their bond in a way very few of their other interactions could. In this one it’s so clearly comforting, this one sliver of normalcy after everything else that’s happened. (And gods I love Alec’s shirt, sorry never sorry, wtf is up with that man and grey shirts? *laughs*)

8. Shout out to Izzy & Luke in 3a. It’s basically one scene, but it gives us a sense of a solid world in a way Shadowhunters generally didn’t, of Luke and Izzy existing in the world as their jobs, Shadowhunter & Cop, as people, as friends, as part of a larger whole in terms of their professional and personal connections. Of course all these people know each other, in all these different ways, whether we see it all the time or not, and that was DELIGHTFUL.

7. SIMON LEWIS

That’s it.

No, obviously, especially, his speech about his grandmother and the Holocaust, because not only is it in important speech on about five levels, the way he tells it illustrates how much he loves Clary, that he’s giving her this story that she, tbqh, hadn’t earned, as a gift for her more than an explanation. It’s just. Gorgeous. It’s a gestalt, one of those moments that is greater than the sum of its parts, and in this particular case, the parts that make up the whole were pretty damn good already.

6. The 2x18 flashback to Magnus & Alec’s first time together. One, because it addressed the way the show had screwed up the original episode, but mostly two, that it was important in how it showed their relationship (fears and issues and strengths and desires, all at once) and the way they interact. Most sex scenes in TV & movies are trying to be titillating and don’t really accomplish anything in terms of plot or character, but this one did. And also it was lovely and giggly and very very pretty. 😅

5. Jocelyn’s funeral: This entire episode, actually, is a really good Clary episode. It showcases her strengths, (she never has any trouble forgiving Alec, never even considers blaming him), her determination, and also her weaknesses, the way her grief makes her reckless, again, and it’s sheer chance that her visit to Iris didn’t go dramatically horrifyingly wrong in ways that would have damaged her and Alec (and everyone who cares about them) in ways that would have lingered for years. But even though they didn’t ever explicitly address most of that, the moment at the funeral, when her voice breaks and Jace speaks for her, gives us enough catharsis that it works anyways. (It’s also a really beautiful moment for Jace, and there are so few moments when he lets himself be who he is to help someone, rather than doing what he thinks he’s supposed to do, that this one really stands out.)

4. Clary killing Valentine. #PRINCESS STABBITY

It’s good, is what I’m saying. Desperate and brutal and I love her.

3. Simon & Jace and the boop-boop both because it’s legit adorable, but also because it was one of the few ‘short-hand’ notes in the epilogue that worked for me exactly as intended. It shows you how well Simon’s integrating into the Nephilim side of the Shadow World (without ever being an ounce less Simon than he ever was) but it also shows that Jace really did learn from everything that happened to him, that he’s no longer hiding what he’s thinking and feeling, that he’s no longer afraid to just, idk, like people. He’s mourning Clary, obviously, but he’s going to be ok, and I believe that he would have been even if she’d never seen him at her show. (Though I think her seeing him is better, that it gives them a second chance to be them without the world ending around them, to be soft rather than desperate.)

2. Nice Gills

Not only is it just a stunningly perfect smile on Alec’s face, but that one moment kind of crystallizes and pulls together all the potentially disparate parts of his personality, how angry he was in s1, the hopelessness here after Jocelyn’s death, the giddy impossibility of that first smile he gave Magnus, the way he let his siblings run him even when he was running the Institute, the way he never quite cracked down on Clary’s assorted crazies because she was doing it for her mother. 

The fact that Alec is both good at his job (killing demons) and a total marshmallow to his family who will burn himself to a crisp to save them is not news, not even back in 2x5 when he met Madzie. It’s apparent in almost everything he does (especially after 1x12, when he’s no longer trying to hide himself to protect his family and has to choose actions to protect them instead). But what’s impressive here is that that smile and those words are completely 100% genuine, despite how worried he is for Clary, how guilty he feels about Jocelyn, how lost he is to have agreed to come here, to a questionable warlock who practices dark magic on the off-chance this will somehow make things better, he is honestly and truthfully there for Madzie when he smiles at her.

And that one moment, when they connect, is well enough done that her saving him from Valentine five episodes later feels completely earned. 

1. MAGNUS BANE’S SHEER EXISTENCE. He is perfection. Even when he makes no sense at all it doesn’t matter because he’s Magnus and he has done nothing wrong ever.

Except probably a bunch of murder and definitely centuries of petty revenge, but that’s just part of his charm. That he chooses not to do the former and has wallowed delightfully in the latter. 

With a special shout-out for Every Time Alec & Magnus Kiss, shut up, they’re beautiful.

[hoshigomi]

Valley of Xuanyao // RAY! (not a review.)

Some thoughts on Xuanyao/Genyou/Dazzling Valley/Mysterious Valley/whatever you want to call it + Ray!

(This isn’t a fully-formed, plot critical review by any stretch of the imagination, but I wanted a chance to say everything I loved about these pieces of theatre, as well as a few criticisms I have.) (These are all my opinions and I’m sure people would agree or disagree with plenty of them!) (It’s literally just a couple lists, read at your own discretion.)

There are MANY SPOILERS HERE so watch out.

First off: Genyou no Tani / Valley of Xuanyao / Chinese Aterui (I guess it’s not as much like Aterui as I initially assumed) / AVATAR (the blue people one) (but set in China) / not NOT Pocahantas ~

Call it what you want, I’ll admit right out of the gate that I didn’t follow the entirety of this show. It got a lot better on the second and third try, but the first go was a little rough. 

Official plot summary here. 

Things I LOVED:

This show is beautiful. The set is very Alphonse Mucha aesthetic in style, and it makes me very sad that exactly 0 pictures do it justice. Not only is the set STUNNING, but it’s INNOVATIVE as well, the way they used huge hilly mountainous set pieces to create, well, valleys (haha) and set the scene actually grabbed my attention SEVERAL times. There are also no pictures that do the palace set justice, but the grandeur of it took my breath away, as did the EASE with which the set took us between settings. Unfortunately the visual aesthetic of the show is like not something I’m skilled enough to describe in words, but my point here is that if you get the chance to see this show, it would be worth it for the visual feast alone. 

This show is beautiful (music edition). BOY! The music is HAUNTING and POWERFUL and simple and complex all at once. I have told several people that if either the opening or finale songs are put on that custom CD maker thing in the theatres I would literally buy a custom CD just to get my hands on these songs like a couple weeks before their official release. I got chills every time Shirotae Natsu opened the show (we could NOT ask for a better new fukukumichou), and without fail, at the (spoilers) mass exodus of the Wen people (hello, Coto Moses?) song. 

The show is beautiful (general stage edition): It’s SO DANCEY. IT IS SO EXPRESSIVE. Even though the vast majority of the cast is costumed… nearly identical to one another, watching a n y one of them is a treat different from any other. There is no shortage of opportunity for these women to emote physically, and not a single one of them holds back. There are also like a billion acrobatic tricks in this show for some reason. They don’t take you out of anything, it’s just all VERY PHYSICAL. The Wen men and women specifically use physicality HARD to express their… history, I guess? There are several scenes with a few singers and a few dancers working together to tell a story. They give me CHILLS. The women (led by Honoka) in the palace also serve to set the aesthetic world and honestly I don’t have anything smart to say about them but they blew me away. Aomi Sario does several cartwheels. Yuunagi Ryou jumps like five feet in the air and does a somersault. I don’t know why any of these women are airborne as much as they are but they sure are good at it. 

Other standout things I loved- there were a LOT more, but I need SOMEONE to talk about these people and moments, and I guess it’s my burden to bear. 

FOR SOME REASON OOKI MAKOTO TALKS LIKE A LOT. She may talk more than Amahana Ema, freshly-transferred Ayaki Hikari, or Kiwami Shin. I can’t stress enough how much there is NO REASON FOR THIS. She ALSO, in a TURN OF FATE, IS NOT PLAYING AN OLD MAN. She’s playing a young soldier (NO FACIAL HAIR!!!!!) who at one point is goofing around under a tree on the edge of a stage and does some incredible pantomime work getting a spider off of her. I’m a little in love with her. I could not be happier that they truly just let her GO OFF this show. If you have ever liked Ooki Makoto, you need to see this show. 

Ooki Makoto is always accompanied by Tenju Mitsuki who, as usual, is doing The Most for the Least Payoff because she like angered a God in her past life but not enough for the God to not give her the most beautiful face known to man. She doesn’t get to do much at all, unfortunately as USUAL, though her character very much has the vibe of her Kamatari character, and she does get to do a really fucking sick trick where she gets hit by an arrow and despite watching her through opera glasses three times in a row I have no idea how she does it. 

SEO YURIA REALLY STEPPED UP HER GAME? This was a good meaty role with a nice little bit of her Red Oni from Another World mixed in for like chaotic measure. She sounds vocally FANTASTIC and looks at times actually TRULY PHYSICALLY IMPOSING. I’ve always been theatrically on the fence about Seo, but it looks like she’s really finding where she fits onstage and her strengths and is working HARD. I’m really into it. 

Arisa Hitomi does beautiful work as the narrator of the whole piece, more or less, I just wish we could have seen more of her. That’s kinda how it’s gonna go from now on huh. Sigh.

Amato Kanon Amato Kanon Amato Kanon Amato Kanon Amato Kanon Amato Kanon . I will live and die in Hoshigumi, but if one day they move her to somewhere else to be top star, (after I mourn for a year and go through the five stages of grief), I will be right there by her side. Her character is spunky and fun and young and then gets tortured and killed (sorry, I said there were spoilers) in a way that I almost couldn’t WATCH. She’s an expert on throwing her (rapidly becoming lifeless) body around onstage in a way that really, really, really broke my heart. I winced. I’m sure I’m not the only one in the audience who would have put myself in her place to save her. 

It’s very cool when they use projections to enhance moments in this- like a sword striking a rock and the sparks that fly, or the mysterious man disappearing. Additionally, the SOUND DESIGN of this show was pretty flawless.

Current Kumichou and Soon-To-Be-Senka member Mari Yuzumi played, obviously, Coto’s mom, and the two of them share some really beautiful moments and part of a song- it was a fitting and sweet part to give her, and I’m so glad she got some real stage time here because lord am I gonna miss her. 

There’s a little drumline throughout some scenes of Wen people featuring (I THINK) Toudou Jun, Asamizu Ryou, Sayaka Rin, Sakuraba Mai, and POSSIBLY Kuresaki Rino. They don’t do anything to serve the plot, they just sometimes act as a transition in and out and winding through group scenes. It kicks ass. 

Though this show was by NO MEANS an “ensemble show” (it was obviously very heavily (and wonderfully!) pulled by Coto, and all the ensemble was…. To be honest, visually mostly indistinguishable from one another), it like… WAS an ensemble show. There are MANY scenes with the HUGE chunks of the troupe, whether it’s the soldiers doing some INCREDIBLE sword and spear work or the dancers as the Wen people telling stories through the sheer power of their NUMBERS, or the women in the palace with their ribbons and dance, the real power of this show is in the ensemble and what they give to the story. Personally, ensemble driven stories tick ALL my boxes, so even if the plot was a little rough for me, the sheer POWER of Hoshigumi really made this a show that I realize now, sitting at my desk in Tokyo, I wish I was seeing again like today. This show did a complete 180 for me, and I can not recommend it enough. It isn’t FUN, but I can’t find the words to express how MOVING and BEAUTIFUL it is. If you can’t see it in person, I guess I recommend buying the blu ray, renting out a movie theatre, and watching it on as big of a screen as you can possibly get.

RAY:

Ray was just OKAY to me, though I admit I DID love it a little more with each consecutive viewing. I wonder how I’ll feel about it at the end of the Tokyo run- it very well might grow on me and stick in my heart as a revue I really love, but for now I’m personally a bit lukewarm on this one. I’m gonna express my three gripes first, and then move on to the things I love. 

1.) God this revue really fucking abuses projections. Not only does it OPEN AND END with an unnecessary mini movie, and not only do they use the projections to transition us literally through the starry galaxy to the PANTHEON which they make with like Windows Screensaver level skill and then for some reason also show us on a real backdrop- if they had the REAL backdrop, why did they need to also show us a CGI version?, but they also straight up show us MOVIES while people are singing. As captivating as I find every single woman in Hoshigumi, I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the acid trip that was the projections. They weren’t STILL EITHER. They were THIS distracting, down to the literal giant eye. I hated them so much. They didn’t make any visual sense, they didn’t enhance a thing, they really weren’t even vaguely thematically appropriate. I hope beyond hope that the venues they use for the tour just don’t have the tech power for this and the projections get cut. I didn’t like a SINGLE one of them. 

2.) I can’t really explain this one but something was… missing. The numbers weren’t…. varied , I guess? They were all the same like. Power level and mostly had the same amount of people onstage (a lot), and while there’s NOTHING I love more than a big group number, this one had… I guess maybe too many? Or maybe it wasn’t the amount that is the issue, maybe it’s just how they weren’t like tonally varied. The numbers were all GOOD, but the flow was weird? I don’t know. Something felt off. If anyone sees this and gets what I mean, please talk to me about it. 

3.) And this one is personal preference, but I thought the whole Ray theme was…. Much too heavy handed for an ohirome GT. To clarify, I think this would have been VERY suitable for a taidan revue, thematically, but I think it’s too early to be playing top star name games and adorning the whole stage with her name… repeatedly. I GET that it’s clever because like, ray of light, starlight, etc, but I didn’t like it. I wouldn’t have liked like, Dramatic ‘S’ as a first revue either, for example. This isn’t personal or about Coto, if they had made Kai top and called her first revue like ‘Seven Seas’ I also would have been like ….#yikes. I just wish they’d save this stuff for later in Coto’s run. 

That said, the good outweighed the bad! Some numbers of note (this is NOT all of them, just the ones that stuck with me) include: 

The opening, which was very fun! The set was cool, multi layered and opening with just Coto inside like a cut out diamond shape on a platform and made good use of a pretty bare stage to really give EVERYONE a moment. There were more featured faces in this number alone that I didn’t even RECOGNIZE than I can count- and that made me really happy to see! Special shoutout to Taiki Hayate and Ruri Hanaka for getting to stand on the edge of the stage and sing. I just think they’re neat. The opening was rock-y and sexy and mature and it was very fun to get to see so many people shine in it. 

This was followed by Seocchi in a number with again, a BEAUTIFUL set. Seriously, when they aren’t abusing the hell out of a projector, this revue IS VISUALLY STUNNING. It’s like set on Jupiter kind of, there’s a swirling galaxy all lit up behind the dancers (Seo, Amato Kanon, Minato Rihi- who has big Renta energy and always makes me happy to look at) Aomi Sario, Ruri Hanaka, notably.) This number has big Look At The Youth Of Tomorrow energy. Seo sounds INCREDIBLE, and everyone who is featured here makes my heart leap. This was definitely one of my favorite numbers. 

There was a tango that would have been 90x sexier if only it didn’t feature those stupid turbans on literally everyone. Mikkii gets to sing her bridge solo (thank God), and the energy is rowdy. Everyone is in white pants.

The chuuzume is nice. It starts what feels like oddly early, but probably isn’t. They abuse the projections during the start of this one, (Hanagata Hikaru) and then thankfully pull the screen up and get rid of them for a while. The chuuzume is neat in that it also features a lot of little groups of siennes, from the young ones (who even get to SING small solos and things) (and I mean SMALL ones)- Amato Kanon has a solo at a point (and is CENTER ON THE BRIDGE for the kyakuseki part of the chuuzume), Aomi Sario and (iirc) Yuuhi Maki get a small duet, little groups are coming on and off constantly. It’s fun. They put the otokoyaku on the bridge and they do some sharp dancing and some kinda… seductive, to me, stuff. Most everyone is in red. The aesthetic of this chuuzume is GOOD.

THIS ROCKETTE MIGHT BE MY FAVORITE ROCKETTE EVER.

Aesthetically it is flawless, and it’s led by three girls including RURI HANAKA who gets a CENTER OF THE BRIDGE SOLO. These costumes are BEYOND adorable as well! Look at them! This rockette really shows off how skilled some of these girls are. They also do a lineup that goes as usual from shortest to tallest to shortest again, except they break this up by putting the three leads in the MIDDLE, which really means its like, short to tallest to SHORTEST to tallest to short again and believe me when I say it is COMICAL. There’s a solid foot difference between some of these women. 

The Olympics number which immediately follows the rockette is lovely, it features a biiiiiig group of the cast and then Mizuno Yuri, Otosaki Itsuki, Sazanami Reira, Aomi Sario, and Amato Kanon as the colors of the Olympic rings. Musically this one didn’t stick that hard with me, but it’s a visual treat, and everyone’s dance proficiency is on full display. Plus if you look at the back of the stage you’ll see Yuunagi Ryou and Hiroka Yuu doing like a dance battle and pulling and pushing each other around which is extremely relevant to my interests. 

From here it got really lovely for me personally. Amahana Ema and Kiwami Shin led Swingin’ On A Star on the bridge (and both of them sound lovely and sweet), and then theres a couple dance featuring about 10 or so people including  Toudou Jun and again Yuunagi Ryou (this is the only place in the revue I didn’t have trouble spotting her unfortunately, and I’m GOOD at finding her), going on while Maisora finishes up the number. It’s sweet and it’s sugary and it’s a piece of like small lightness after all the very Heavy and Full group numbers before. 

The kuroenbi is pretty good, it felt somehow��� unfinished? But immediately after that is Coto jumping into You Are My Sunshine which I personally find to be the most charming thing in the world. It includes solos for Seo, Hanagata Hikaru, Aichan, and a LOT of attention on Hoshigumi’s musumeyaku who get to ALL line up on the bridge together and sing. It’s a treat. It made my heart happy and made me grin really big. 

Other shoutouts go to 

Sazanami Reira and her wild hair flips

Akachan who for some reason sounds vocally like she’s underwater, which was hard for me to place until recently 

Maisora and Coto who really DO work together well as a combi though these two shows didn’t give them much chance to see that (please watch Mozart once it’s out on DVD to see what these two can DO together)

Mari Yuzumi for still killing it with everyone else in every number despite the fact that she’s so up there that they’re moving her to senka after this- boy I am gonna MISS her

Amato Kanon for holding my future in her, soft, capable hands.

Minato Rihi for smiling like Renta

The upperclassmen for not letting being completely sidelined ruin their attitude and for still giving their all to everything and pulling my attention with their YEARS of expertise

Kisa Kaoru, Soua Takeru, Houma Toa, Hiroki Yuzuha, and Kuresaki Rino just because they make me smile.

Sakuraba Mai and Haruto Yuuho who should actually be a top combi together. 

Seo Yuria for really just like stepping it up all around and drawing my attention and taking up SPACE.

Ruri Hanaka because holy shit, girl….

All in all, this was a good pair. Not every revue works for everyone, and maybe this one just didn’t grab my heart the way I wished it did. It was still fun, and it definitely had enough numbers that I loved for me to want to go back multiple times, and whatever Ray lacked, Valley picked up for me. It’s a good set of shows, and everyone does really lovely work. I can’t wait to see where Coto and Maisora’s Hoshigumi goes!

[spaceorphan18]

Fantasia 2000

The idea for another Fantasia had been kicked around over the sixty years before Fantasia 2000 became an actual thing.  I mean, Disney’s original concepts were really about merging music with visual media, and I’m not surprised that, after enough time had passed, it was something they wanted to bring back into culture.  Did culture want it? I have no idea - I think this film has kind of been forgotten by the mainstream, which doesn’t surprise me much. 

Like the original Fantasia, I feel like this is a tax to sit through -- even at roughly 75 minutes.  Maybe it’s because my classical music tastes differ (somewhat) from what’s presented here? Maybe it’s because I have a hard time focusing on segmented shorts in general? Maybe this whole thing isn’t my cup of tea in the first place, and if I want to hear classical music, I’d rather think up my own imagery to them.  

I don’t think Fantasia 2000 is bad by any means, but I don’t really think it’s all that memorable either, and sometimes feels like more of an experiment for the animators more so than an interesting specimen for a film going audience.  Or maybe I’m less evolved.  It could be debated. 

SYMPHONY NO. 5 IN C MINOR - I. ALLEGRO CON BRIO

Like the original Fantasia, there are a bunch of different segments.  We get a little bit of the original Fantasia being clip-showed back to us before we settle in to our first piece.  

They claim this is an abstract piece like the Toccata and Fugue that kicked off the original Fantasia, but it’s really not that abstract.  There are little triangle creatures that bounce around and fight against other triangle creatures, and there’s clearly a story here, which I almost find disappointing.  This piece, being a Beethoven Symphony, is one of my favorites, and I feel like it deserved a little more than the trite color battle that happened on screen.  But that’s just me. 

PINES OF ROME

The rest of these all have a celebrity introduction, and this one is kicked off by Steve Martin doing a little schtick, as if he were hosting an awards ceremony.  It’s cute in an awkward way. 

So -- this one is about whales.  Whales who float in the sky instead of water.  Because sure.  Fantasia 2000 was originally made for IMAX theaters (which were newer at the time?) This one was all CGI, and probably looked pretty impressive on a huge screen.  However, watching on a laptop probably does it no favors, and I was kind of bored, ngl. 

RHAPSODY IN BLUE

Introduction by a suave Quincy Jones, this is perhaps my favorite of the bunch.  It’s the story of a bunch of New Yorkers going about their lives in the 40s.  The stylized art is nice, the story is cute, and the music fits in really well with the animation.  I liked it! 

PIANO CONCERTO NO. 2 IN F MINOR - I. ALLEGRO

Better Midler awkwardly recounts scrapped Fantasia ideas.  Because sure why not. 

And then we get a little story about a tin soldier fighting off a Jack-In-The-Box for a ballerina.  It’s cute, except there’s this whole weird part where the solider ends up down a sewer drain, in a fish, and then the fish ends up in the original owner’s home.  I mean, why take the ridiculous detour? But I liked this one a lot more than most of the other ones, so I’ll give it that. 

THE CARNIVAL OF THE ANIMALS, FINALE

James Earl Jones being funny! I can appreciate that! 

This one is a short, two minute piece about a flamingo using a yo-yo.  It’s a little ‘meh’ but cute enough as any traditional cartoon short. 

THE SORCERER’S APPRENTICE

We get a little Penn and Teller infomercial about stage magic being fake -- which is super weird -- and real magic is Mickey Mouse.  Sure.  

And then we get the entire segment from the original film.  This feels a little like a cop-out, tbh.  This film is barely over an hour long, and they use a good fifteen minutes of it to redo the first film? Why? 

POMP AND CIRCUMSTANCE, MARCHES 1-4

This one.  ug.  Okay.  

As far as objectively talking about cartoons, this one is cute, it stars Donald Duck as Noah’s assistant in a retelling of Noah’s Ark, and it’s fine.  I think kids would enjoy it.  

However - I just massive issues with the story of Noah’s Ark in the first place, just lots of them, and it got me thinking about them as I was watching it, so any joy was kind of sucked out of watching this.  I will give it a point for having unicorns and dragons off to the side laughing at the whole thing. 

But more so, the music, if you don’t know, is famous for being the Graduation March.  And having played it a thousand times in my youth, it’s firmly connected to things such as endings and goodbyes and life changes (and I suppose a life killing flood would suffice for that) but it just doesn’t work here for me -- played as the animals get on and off the boat in pairs.  I found myself rolling my eyes at the schtick of it all.  Oh well.  

FIREBIRD SUITE

Angela Lansbury shows up, being the most goddamn professional person in this entire production, and leads us into the finale.  

It’s the story of a forest spirit who breathes life into her land after dearth (and winter) have ripped through it.  While Firebird Suite isn’t my favorite piece of classical music, this might be the most artistically dramatic of all the sections, and the one (besides Rhapsody in Blue) that fits the animation the best.  The story is relatively good for what it is, and gives the film the majestic finish that is going for.  

Final Thoughts: Did I like it? Meh.  These kind of things just aren’t my cup of tea, and while I think it mostly holds together as an idea, I think that these anthology type films, especially ones that kind of are thrown together without thematic elements to tie them together, don’t necessarily work for me.  As I said earlier, it works better as a thought piece, and an animator’s experiment, more than enjoyable film. 

[skyhopedango]

Fall Anime 2019 - first episodes part 2

Continuing from part 1... 

Mairimashita! Iruma-kun: This was I think the safest choice on my list - I knew what I was getting into and I got exactly that, and I’m fine with that. This is a silly little show with silly characters, from what I read from the manga it’s not going to turn DARK AND SERIOUS anytime soon, and it does silly comedy and "ma” puns in an entertianing way. It’s nothing special, but it’s cute enough for me to keep watching.

Hoshiai no Sora: One sign of being a jaded old fogey is that I’m just completely, utterly done with shows about Everyday High School Kids Experiencing The Springtime of Life. Honestly, I just don’t care anymore, at least not unless there’s a twist or two (see: Tsuritama). And I never cared about sports stuff either, so I’d been set to skip this one, but then I learned that it was directed and written by the Akane Kazuki. So I had to give it a chance.

And I admit that I almost didn’t make it through - I actually quit about half time at first, and then forced myself to watch the rest, because shit, it’s Akane, there has to be something interesting somewhere. And it was worth it, because that stinger? Put everything into a different perspective. I still don’t give a shit about the Passions of Youth or soft tennis, but the domestic angle is something that I find interesting (at least it doesn’t seem to be set up to play out as domestic issue elements usually do).

Tokunana: This show was one I’d been cautiously looking forward to, and... I’m kinda disappointed? It’s not that I didn’t get what I expected - this is the kind of show where you can safely predict what you’re going to get, and I got just that. But also - I got just that. Nothing more. And while I won’t expect a show like this to try and reinvent the wheel, I usually want more than a heap of tired old tropes played straight with no twists in sight. Still, I’ll give it another chance.

One thing that brings the show down is the main dude. I’d feared he’d be another of that particular type of Cool Anime Dude that I find really annoying, and...yep, he is. And he’s voiced by Tsuda Kenjirou who does his Tsuda Kenjirou thing with him that just makes him more annoying. 

Kabukichou Sherlock: *scratches head* I’m really not sure what to make of this one. Kabukichou Sherlock was the show I’d been looking forward to the most, but this first episode was just... a miss. I mean, the visuals are fun, the music is fun, the voice performances are mostly fun, the characters are OK, I like the detective pastiche/fanfic aspect, I even liked Sherlock’s weird out-of-the-blue rakugo thing, etc. - but the problem is, the show concentrated on being ~zany~ and ~eccentric~ so much it ended up a total mess in spite of its individual elements not being bad in and of themselves.

(Well, mostly not being bad. Because eh, Mrs Hudson... I’m disappointed that in the year of our Lord 2019 “lol an okama onee! and she’s hitting on straight men!” is still a thing and is played straight, expecting laughs. Also, the gay dudes - they were clearly supposed to be funny because they’re gay, and ffs show, it’s 2019.)

Anyway, I’ll give it another chance, just... show, please, calm the fuck down. You’re eccentric, I get it. Just dial it down a bit and focus on being coherent, and perhaps less behind the times.

Babylon: I’m enjoying this one so far, albeit cautiously, because it’s by the guy who wrote Kado which started out really well and ended as orbital bullshit. So for now I’m on board - I like the story, I like the visuals (it’s a bit clunky but there are some nice moments of character animation), I even like the characters, although I could do without the ~dangerous female~ aspect. But I’m totally expecting some orbital bullshit to pop up sooner or later.

[pilferingapples]

PILF I would love to know your thoughts on the Les Mis miniseries, if you've seen it!!!

ahaha oh goshLET THE  RECORD SHOW I WAS DIRECTLY ASKED 

I have seen it ! Repeatedly! I have…a Lot Of Thoughts about it? Enough that it would make a lot of very very long posts, so this is just a thumbnail summary (and under a cut for Spoilers and also discussion of all the triggering things LM is full of):

This is not an adaptation that left me feeling neutral  about much in it, I’ll give it that. 

Things I loved: 

-Excellent scene and set design! That may sound like I’m reaching for something nice to say, but like…how Good it was really jumped out? The furniture, the posters, just…generally everything.  The fact that the few places they fudged and used modern doors or molding or something were noticeable  is really telling; the rest of it was that  consistent that such minor anachronisms actually stood out instead of just fading into the background. The environment is a huge part of Les Mis, basically an ongoing character, and it was nice to see it so well represented!

-Some fantastic casting choices!  I didn’t love absolutely every choice (though I wonder in every instance of that if it was the actor or the script/direction) and there are some Unfortunate Implications to discuss in the overall pattern of the casting, as others have said at more length.  But geez there are some fantastic performances!  Ellie Bamber’s Cosette really got the character in a way I’ve rarely seen, and Gavroche was fantastic. The whole Thenardier family in general was really  well acted (allowing for some of the Choices made at the script level), and the Extras in so many scenes had a ton of life, which is great!

-Georges! A rare Wild Georges Pontmercy! And he was very good; his scenes in Episode 1 were some of the most effective. 

- The barricade sequence–the barricade sequence proper– flat out astonished me. I was expecting less than nothing , because that’s about what most English-language adaptations do (…and then Episode 4 Happened and my expectations sunk even lower…) but holy carp– from Lamarque’s funeral to OFPD, this is the best Barricade Sequence in an English language non-musical adaptation I’ve seen. No, it’s not the full-on-full-cast Barricade Days adaptation of my dreams, but it’s got its own consistency and development, despite inheriting…issues…from the rest of the series. I understand some of the reasons other people don’t like it, but. It’s really good.  I find something new to appreciate there every time I watch it. 

Things I Hated: 

- So many changes that don’t actually change anything  and so only serve to make the characters’ motivations incoherent?  The whole Champmathieu thing is the most representative but it’s all over…

- Valjean. Pretty much everything done with Valjean post-Petit Gervais. If I start getting into it, it’ll take over this whole post,  but just. Valjean. 

- Everything that was changed about Eponine’s story. I am livid  about this. The script went out of its way to rob her of her moments of power and agency and the show’s attempt to frame a teenager forced into sex work by poverty and her parents as ~~sexy was appalling. Erin Kellyman is a fantastic actress and she deserved better. 

-In General, every attempt at being ~~sexy was repulsive. I mean I realize I’m not someone who’s generally charmed  by Sex Appeal the way some people are but like. Tholomyes. W H Y.  

-The costuming game was bizarrely weak?? I know a lot of people sneer at the very idea  of caring about costuming, how very trivial , but! It’s an important tool in visual storytelling! It can convey so much information about the world and society of the story, and then build  on that to  express the characters’ relationship to their world and society in addition  to more obvious character signifiers (like “pastels for the ingenue” type stuff).  And the era of Les Mis has such massively socially-coded Fashion Modes to use as shorthand!  And it’s all just. So badly handled.Ugh. I will be here All Day if I really start but. It was bad and it’s always  distracting me when I watch it. 

-Very Weird Pacing choices; some of it was weird changes in the narrative (both additions and deletions)  , and a lot of it was just actual pacing in-scene (”Javert Dramatically Eats a Sandwich” may be the poster child here:P).  

- I WILL FIGHT A PHYSICAL EMBODIMENT OF THE SOUNDTRACK. Just because this isn’t the musical doesn’t mean the soundtrack needed to try to score for a horror movie via leaky plumbing.  

I don’t even know:

BBC Javert. Because I mean….he’s a wreck , character-wise. He has zero internal consistency on any level besides “obsessed with Jean Valjean”. It’s a hopeless ruin of one of the story’s most well-realized and complex characters. But it’s like…bad to the point of parody. Javert by Kate Beaton. By the time he’s screaming WHERE’S YOUR LEADER, JEAN VALJEAN?!?  at the barricades I just. I can’t . I cackle. It’s hilarious , it shouldn’t be but it is!  An absolute mess of a character, but Entertaining in ways he’s. Not really supposed to be.   -10000 Points for Actual Javert, +10000 points for Comedy. 

- The Ending. Like…I see what it was going  for, but the show needed to give the momes a lot more time to earn that ending, and also do…about a million other things differently. I generally don’t think it Works, which is too bad, because it is  an interesting idea, but..yeah. It throws me out of the show so my last impression of the whole thing is  like…Structural Analysis, instead of Emotional Engagement , and that’s not really what LM is built for, so I can’t count it as a win, but…I do appreciate the desire to try to make a final statement…?  So I’m Very Torn, here. 

–anyway this is mostly Thumbnail Reactions and it’s still  absurdly long?? I can talk in more detail about any of it if you want, but I think I better cut myself off here for now! 

[destiny-smasher]

I used to be close friends with one of the composers for Steven Universe. I watched them rise from a YouTube remixer living in a cramped bedroom in a shared apartment with nothing but a mattress on the floor and a keyboard beside it to owning a house, happily married with a whole backyard garden and a cat because they found success working on one of the biggest cartoon shows I’ve known. But they broke off that friendship earlier this year and it’s made my biased love for Steven Universe become very difficult to grasp with. Understanding how and why we weren’t friends anymore was likewise difficult to grasp, even after hours of us trying to hash things out and resolve it. And while we DID resolve things amicably (I hope) and peacefully, it wasn’t until Steven Universe: The Movie that I was really able to feel like I could see the forest from the trees and ‘get’ what happened. This will be a kind of review of the movie, but mostly it became more of a personal ramble relating my real life experiences with Aivi to those of characters within SU, especially the antagonist of the Movie. This is lifted from this Twitter thread, so it was originally written stream of consciousness and I’m sharing it here to keep it more readable and archived. This is a bit of a read so tucking it behind a ‘read more.’

--

"You keep on turning pages for people who don't care about you And still it takes you ages to see that no one's there Everyone's gone on without you"

Time to finally talk about the #StevenUniverse Movie. Strap in 'cause this gon' get personal.

It should go without saying BUT I am gonna be talking about the movie! Dunno how in detail per se but I can't properly say what I wanna say without diving into some of the important plotty stuff. So yea.

Don't read this thread if ya don't want #spoilers #sumovie 

First off, I wanna talk about what this movie does well. Going in, I had heard it was framed like a musical. And I wasn't sure how I felt about that idea, though it wasn't surprising. After all, the 'musical' style episodes tend to resonate quite a lot. 

I think they work great when it's one song in a 10 minute episode, but an hour and a half of songs? I wasn't sure how well that would go. Turns out, pretty well. This is due to many factors but primarily the variety of song styles and art styles used throughout. Basically every scene has a primary song that drives it home, and basically all of them have a different genre/tone as well as visual presentation style. A lot of work went into getting it all to work together and feel cohesive. TBH for me personally the main highlight of the movie was honestly the animation. Average TV goers might just see "yup sure looks like a cartoon" but on the whole, on average, the movie is CLEARLY animated and framed with much more dynamism and detail than the majority of SU. Getting to see these characters we've gotten to know over the past few years a couple years in the future, generally at peace with things, but animated with more detail than ever, THAT is the true highlight of the film for me. Naturally, there was a lot of bits of comedy, often relying on knowledge of what the characters have been through, and I felt a lot of bittersweet smiles throughout as this felt like a good send off for Steven and his Space Moms. It managed to work in cameos from basically everyone you'd expect, some of which...didn't work out as well as others (specifically, the Diamonds bookending the movie was a bit forced and weird IMO but they ARE important to the lore even if I find them boring tbh) It was nice getting to 'catch up' with everyone, and the plot itself uses a generic 'gotta save the world again' thing (bleh) in a creative way, at least -- it all becomes an excuse to "re-live" the four primary heroes' stories through song. Cool enough. Something the movie inadvertently highlights, however, is the fact that SU as a series really started spinning its wheels a lot for its second half, in particular. Much has been said about how and why and why or not this doesn't matter, etc. etc. I was just along for the ride. I've repeatedly expressed my personal bias in the series' favor for a long time, and now? I kinda don't really have that personal bias anymore. I still love the show, I still think it's one of the best cartoons I've ever seen. But those rose-tinted glasses are off now. Taking said glasses off and actually listening to and looking up what critics of the show had to say kind of unearthed a bunch of things I had kept sweeping under the rug for the sake of personal bias/support of someone I loved and cared for a lot. We'll get back to that. I say all of this because the movie ironically failed to do much of anything NEW, something the series itself kind of struggled with for a while until it finally got around to the conclusion of Steven's story arc. The film ultimately kind of ends with "yeah Steven can change!" Which, um yea? Obviously. He's a completely different person than he was in S1. But he's kiiiiinda been the same person for....some while now. The weird irony of SU as a series is that about halfway through the narrative, the protag has essentially grown up, done. The last half or third or so of SU's narrative was basically Steven having to cheer everyone around him up and help them deal with their shit, and...kinda just going about that essentially the same way every time. The power of love, the friends we made along the way, etc. To be clear, there's nothing BAD about this, and in fact it's what sets Steven apart from most every other narrative of this type. The protag is almost always forced to change in ways they don't want, do things they don't want to do, etc. But when you put it side by side with something like Avatar or Gravity Falls, those series saw everyone growing alongside each other. There are clear arcs for everyone, almost all of which get resolved in ways fitting each character. It's imperfect but it's varied. SU has a tendency to just...hammer everyone's character flaws and arcs with ONE option: just love yourself and be nice, and everyyyyyyythinggggg 'll work out in the end! Which is fine, but when a story does it for so long, over and over, always the same, it gets a bit weird. I specifically LIKED in the film, at the end, that Steven actually does have to fight, because THAT is what Spinel needed to do. She needed to let out all of that anger, and that violence was her own way of doing it. 'you can't just sing a song to make everything go away' etc. It's typical, perhaps, for protagonists to have to tackle problems in different ways because that's LIFE. The fact is, Steven's approach will NOT save everyone. Lapis stilllll kinda stands as an example of this but an as of yet unresolved one. I liked that at the end of things, Spinel still doesn't come into the same fold as everyone else. Basically "sorry, I already fucked this up too much, I can't really deal with this," and that is IMPORTANT and I really liked it. Before really digging into the personal angle, I want to bring up how fascinating it is that the movie essentially had a real BUDGET and so they deliberately seemed to design an antagonist that would take full advantage of that animation budget. EASILY, by far, Spinel is the most interesting-to-watch antag in the whole series imo, in terms of how she moves and fights, etc. They really just wanted to flex and they did it, but like any SU antag there's (somewhat predictable) motives. This gets back at what I was saying before -- how the series spins its wheels a lot -- but Spinel's motivation/back story isssss kiiiinnndaaaa a lot like many many characters' issues and, like, I get it. We get it. Steven's Mom was Not The Best does that have to be the basis behind kinda EVERYONE who goes against Steven? Or the Gems? Lapis, Bismuth, and Peridot all offered more varied motivations, and even THEN, Bismuth was still essentially in the same boat? Anyway, I digress. I DO appreciate the way the series set up Rose as this wondrous lovely lady and has severely dissected and broken that down to the point where I really do not like Rose, in any of her ID's, as a character or a fictional person, and it did so gradually. A lot of what the movie did was kind of expected. Right? Songs, singing, check. Steven going about things the same way, check. Re-living/celebrating how far he and his moms have come, check. What I didn't expect was -- OK, well, there WAS that one fusion...which, um

But the actual thing that really latched onto me was how much I conncted with Spinel. As is the case with any story that has well presented characters, you can attach to SOME part of just about all of them. I associate most closely with Pearl overall but can relate with just about anyone prominent. I see parts of me and Jenny in Steven/Connie, in Ruby/Sapphire, in Peridot/Lapis. I see what kind of woman I might've become in Amethyst (and sometimes am). Spinel, though, is a really weird case because I see my adolescent self in her SO MUCH and yet fairly recent events in my life -- directly tied TO the show itself, mind you -- make that connection weirdly poignant and present. For some context, I used to be good friends with Aivi, one of the musicians who works on the series with their husband. Spring 2018, Aivi and I vocalized to each other that we considered one another one of the closest friends in each other's lives. We're no longer friends. To make sure this is clear, I think Aivi is a wonderful person, and our breaking apart wasn't violent or dramatic or anything, Aivi just...decided they weren't interested in the relationship anymore. And neglected to tell me this until like a year later. The context is of course not at ALL as severe or dramatic as Spinel/Pink, so please don't assume there's some one-to-one there. But OOF are there some harsh similarities and it really made Spinel's backstory sting in a very confusing way. I say 'confusing' because, as I mentioned, I see my adolescent self in Spinel. The way I was going about making friends matches her 'happy' self. The way I acted in my senior year of college matches her 'angry' self. There was no single person that created any of that, though. In high school, I was like Starfire, in college, I tried to nurture that, play to my strengths. I failed miserably. And what I feel is a big part of why is inherently tied to my transitioning (which is, still, something I feel I am failing miserably at). By the end of college I was more like Raven, and there I remained through the duration of my first long-term romance, into a very weird and atypical marriage and breakup, and then I moved to CA and started changing. Fittingly, my current self can't quite ID with any single Teen Titan. I'm not a teen anymore, after all. Throughout a lot of my friendship with Aivi, they really seemed to fixate on comparing me to Pearl. It sometimes made me uncomfortable the particular ways they did, though. I strongly identified with Pearl's flaws and strengths in personality (though we're obviously different people), and so seeing Pearl go through redemption via self-love and self-acceptance meant a lot to me. "It's Over, Isn't It?" I was IN THE ROOM listening to Aivi and their husband work on the chorus to that song. Obviously they couldn't talk about it but I knew damn well what it was about, and anticipated that piece for a long time. Now it's even more weirdly painful. I met Aivi because they made Mario arrangements they put on YouTube and they happened to live a few blocks away when I was subletting my first summer in CA. They seemed very kind and caring and eager to Be Nice and at the time I really needed that at a very vulnerable and fragile time in my life so I latched onto that. -In The Garden- The week when the LiS terfs freaked out on me and that Bad Spinel side of me lashed back, and I found myself suffering from being gaslit and facing the fact that the worst part of myself that Trigon in Raven's mind that Angry Spinel was still THERE was still ME It was too much For the first (and thankfully, only) time in my life, I experienced suicidal thoughts. And Aivi REACTED to that shit. Strongly. In a way no one ever had for me before, ever. They drove across the Bay to my house, picked me up, had me over, and helped me process it. And in the months to come, as I was healing and coming to terms with how That Worst Part of Me That I Wanted to BE RID OF was still THERE and apparently could just fucking show up, through all of that, Aivi helped me work through things, and we really bonded. In retrospect, though, it's SO damned hard for me to tell if Aivi and I became so close because of mutual respect or pity or just conditioned behavior to Be Nice and Keep Up Appearances. I dunno. What I know NOW is that apparently Cost More than I would've thought. I'm not Aivi so I don't want to really dig into 'dirt' (again, Aivi is a great person who works very hard and that's WHY their work is so good) but looking back, it's wild to see their progression into SUCCESS and fame while I just stood by, floundering The thing is, Aivi was a super busy person. We barely got to spend time together -- when we DID, it was a multi-hour affair and apart from like, Jenny, Aivi is prolly the person I've had the deepest, most vulnerable conversations with. They were next to me when I realized 'oh huh I'm maybe trans??' because they were there when I was at one of the lowest points in my life. I never ASKED them to be there, to Be So Nice and as it turns out, Being So Nice is harder than it looks. So to kind of loop this back to the movie, I wasn't some Skullgirls Peacock Cuphead grinny goof or anything like that but I AM WILLING to bet that from Aivi's POV the way Happy Spinel acts toward Steven is prolly how I felt in Aivi's life at points, at the least. The irony is that we would go weeks, months, barely interacting. But looking back, the way Aivi talked about things, the same phrase keeps dominating my mind: Aivi got bored of me. I wasn't 'useful' to them anymore. Aivi said that day in spring 2018 was like 'the climax' of our friendship, or something like that. Way they talked about it was like...the finale of a season of TV. Our character arc together was over. Even though we TALKED about it, came to mutual understandimng of The Logic behind Aivi's decision to cut ties, I don't think it ever REALLY made sense to me, how Aivi must've felt about our friendship, until Spinel. By spring of 2019, my role in Aivi's life -- from what they have told me, from what I can perceive -- was more like I existed in a separate space from the rest of their life. I was that one interesting person always waiting in The Garden for them to visit when they felt like it Because while Aivi had gotten BIG, gotten MARRIED, gotten a HOUSE, found legitimate SUCCESS in their creative field I was still poor still stuck in retail still unable to find an audience still unable to understand the pressures of Success And OOOOFFF in those last couple years, interacting became more and more strained for both of us, from opposite ends of things. Aivi had responsibilities, PEOPLE vying for their attention, people wanting to hire them, projects to complete, a house, a spouse, etc etc My life was (and kiiiinda still is?) nothing like that, and as our Mutual Creatives Struggling to MAKE THINGS and Get By transforming into Yep I Am Still Here but you are SUCCESSFUL I think that really put a lot of strain on things I never accepted until Spinel. After Aivi hit it big with SU, in particular, they gradually started...acting differently. Acting in ways that made less and less sense to me. They were a Diamond now. And I was still just what I was. When drawing comparisons to characters on the show, Aivi persistently compared me to Pearl. A fact I once took pride in. They repeatedly compared themself to Garnet. Which...always kind of didn't make sense to me. Aivi wasn't really like Garnet. They are more NOW, though? In the sense of how they act, I suppose. Specifically, one of the last things Aivi said to me was that trying to be friends with me had started feeling like Pearl trying to force Garnet to fuse with her. This was problematic because from my POV nothing of the sort was happening. All I was looking for was occasionally hanging out a few times a year. Like. Ya know. Actually a lot less than what I was looking for with basically all of my other friends. And that was still Too Much? But when I start looking at things like Pink Diamond and Spinel instead of Pearl and Garnet, somehow things make a lot more sense. I was probably too clingy, too exciteable, and what amusement or relief I could provide eventually stopped being useful. Aivi eventually didn't even want to spend time with friends to just...spend time with them. Everything had to have some kind of practical Purpose to it, it had to be contributing to a Goal. I still don't get that, tbh. But I'm also not A Diamond. I'm not Successful. The most responsibility I have right now is fucking hanging up the laundry to dry. I have college loans that have and continue to feel pointless to try and repay. I have severe dental problems I haven't been able to fix. My body fell out of shape because of retail hell, and what energy I’ve had to spare from that always ends up going into the people I love, and trying to keep Making Things. Let's not forget The Complications of coming out and wanting to transition but not possessing the resources to do so. (Aivi was actually super supportive of this btw and was the first person to make me feel comfortable wearing feminine things so yea) Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is that MY LIFE is not together. My personality is? I feel like I am finally Myself in terms of mental/emotional stability. And that is largely because Jenny helped me get there. But Aivi helped a lot with that, too. But I think Aivi got to a point where Success was more of a measure of how Grown Up and Healthy one was because despite my behavior, my personality, my mood, what I was asking for, and what I was giving, all changing DRASTICALLY after being with Jenny, I think Aivi still...looked at me the way Pink Diamond looked at Spinel during that song. Like, "yeeeaaaa ok kiddo it's time for me to go now, kinda done here" This is what's so confusing about all of this metaphor/etc. I'm not...like Spinel anymore? My current, post-coming-out self doesn't really relate with Happy OR Angry Spinel. It's almost like Aivi couldn't see me for who I became, and could only see me for who I had been. And maybe that's like why Spinel can't be friends with Steven at the end. It's too painful. I used to take pride in being associated with Pearl because "I'm enough" and "being strong in the REAL way" but now it's more like "oh you just think I'm still hung up and needy and clingy?" which uh don't feel so great a comparison. I can't help but wonder if while working on the movie, Aivi saw some of themself in Pink. Because I'm not the only person who apparently wasn't 'useful' to them anymore. And I'm not saying we should've kept forcing something that wasn't working. Not at all. What we had was good for both us, but it also entailed a lot of patience on my part and effort on theirs. And unlike any of my other long term friends, I often ended up waiting weeks, months, "Happily wondering night after night, Is this how it works? Am I doing it right?"

Years and years of broken friendships, one after the other, most lasting merely 6 months, MAYBE a year at most, with a handful that have lasted since middle school (but which are so much harder to maintain) took a toll on my Adult Self until Jenny, anyway. For quite a long time - the majority of my life, currently - I assumed I just was Too Different and that was why my friendships didn't seem to last, didn't seem to extend to the depths I was looking for. That's perhaps one critical difference between Spinel and I: she's looking for FUN, for smiling faces, for attention, for creating smiles, I just want some fucking consistency. At this point, I'm not even sure WHY I still reach out to people. I don't NEED friendships in that desperate way I used to, back in the Happy/Angry Spinel times. And I've come to terms with that Other Max part of myself and integrated it, accepted it. My worst parts are still me and instead of suppressing them (often by relying on bids of deep friendship with others) I just have to let them EXIST and let them do their thing once in a while. This is ALL why Celeste hit me as hard as it did. Because even if I'm not actually much like Spinel anymore, and Aivi's not really like Pink Diamond, even if I don't actually share much in common with Madeline (other than the subtle 'I drink sometimes to deal with my problems' thing, which I don't anymore) I still comprehend and resonate so much with that concept of just needing to accept the worst parts of yourself and work with them rather than trying to keep them caged up and then they escape and rampage every 5-10 years or so and ruin your life As I felt myself coming to all of these Good Feelings I FINALLY felt like I could help Aivi in the ways they had helped me. That I finally had something to offer I didn't before. Turns out, I didn't, apparently. Aivi had More Important Things to do than visit me in The Garden. And I couldn't blame them. Not a bit. Especially if they had gotten bored of visiting me. I didn't like feeling like a burden on them, either. Can't really argue with that. During the last time we talked, Aivi didn't use the WORDS, didn't literally say them, but I finally could see it: I wasn't Useful anymore. I couldn't Understand, either, because I wasn't Successful. Our friendship was rewarding, but because it required effort. And that effort was still worth it to me, but no longer to them. I was no longer worth it. And despite that, despite starting to feel those hunches, I spent those final months -- as had been the case before, they were afraid to hurt me so avoided actually confronting the problem -- I remained "Happy to listen, Happy to stay Happily watching her drift away" I have no idea if any aspect of our friendship impacted anything Aivi had worked on creatively. TBH Aivi seemed to approach even relationships themselves with more of a logical, pragmatic style -- it was entirely unique compared to anyone I had ever connected with. But if you've read @lis-allwounds then it might not surprise you to know that a lot of what I expressed through Stella and Max, as well as Other Max and Another Stella, channels a lot of these things. I even quoted Aivi directly in the story's end (perhaps foolishly optimistic) And yes, that epilogue moment of sorts is gonna be entirely different if I ever do finish the visual novel. The fact is that we were ALWAYS very different people and our friendship was weird and complicated and hard for one or both of us throughout its, what, 8 year duration? Ironically, I think I took away the opposite 'Character Arc Lesson' they did from all this. But that's just the thing, nothing is permanent for a Human Being. We aren't Gems, we don't actually fuse, we can't just change our appearances when we feel like it, or project ourselves to look how we want to look, or exist for thousands of years. But we DO all have different needs, different ways of understanding those needs, and different ways of needing to adjust or change ourselves or our environments in order to pursue what we want to pursue with the limited time we have here. We tried, hard, and it lasted long enough. If I'm not useful, I'm not useful, I guess? I don't have any ill will toward Aivi, I loved them as a friend and I know they loved me, too, and were better at showing it than most any friends I ever have had. If I'd been better at reciprocating in ways that were actually useful, that would've been good -- but then maybe we wouldn't have become friends in the first place if I hadn't needed 'saving' in the first place, I don't fuckin' know. And I hope my saying all of these things doesn't make anyone think any less of Aivi because your relationship with them is, very likely, not at all personal like mine is. And you know as well as I do how good they are at what they do. Aivi took the time to ease me out of things. Aivi did NOT suddenly up and vanish for thousands of years. While the dynamics of the situation might bare sharp points of similarity, Aivi is not like Pink Diamond and I'm not like Spinel -- not in the present, anyway. Stories help us because they share THREADS with reality but it's always important to recognize those threads for what they are and not confuse them for ropes. And me ranting and tossing all of this out there is something part of me has wanted to do for months but needed to take the time to grieve and process and accept. And maybe it's selfish to be posting all of this, I don't know. But it helps me accept myself and them a lot more. "Finally something finally news about how the story ends" Aivi likely has brand new friends, better ones than me, and I'm willing to bet some of them worked on this movie. And it turned out pretty good, all things considered, probably in part because Aivi was able to focus on it That person I became friends with, she doesn't exist anymore. Just like how who I used to be when Aivi first me, he doesn't exist anymore, either. We both changed, and grew in opposite directions, I guess. We've found happiness and growth and relief in different ways. In the end the Movie helped me come to terms with all of this in a way Angry Spinel younger me couldn't have still hurts yo

"Isn't that lovely?

Isn't that cool?

Isn't that cruel?

And aren't I a fool

to have happily listened,

happy to stay,

happily watching her drift away"

[tearlessrain]

okay I’m gonna liveblog the lion king we’re going to punch this dead horse until it gets up and walks away.

it’s just going to be a giant text wall of me complaining and nitpicking everything I think they should have done instead of what they did so probably just skip this one.

re: the bland visual design of this movie - elephant graveyard, nala says the sun is going down so why didn’t they take this opportunity to perhaps. have the sun be actually going down. and give the whole scene an ominous dusky red tone. that would have looked cool.

every once in a while a character emotes in a way that I’m like “okay, they can give them expressions and body language, they’re just deciding not to for some reason.”

I feel like this is a perfect example of my issue with this; when simba does the “I laugh in the face of danger” cackle, nothing really moves except his mouth. and I don’t know why, because like. the one on the left is what they did. the one on the right is still well within the range of realistic movement for a feline but it doesn’t look like a trained animal meowing on cue that got dubbed over with laughing.

and I can’t figure out why they wouldn’t go with the one on the right. and it frustrates me. this is a thing that happens constantly in this movie and I can usually pinpoint exactly how they could have animated it differently.

the zoomed out shots and color/arrangement of the mufasa lecture are really pretty though. if they’d just stop zooming in on the faces while they’re talking.

... okay, no, we’ve transitioned scenes and we’re looking at hyenas now but this is exactly the same color scheme and I don’t think there’s a deliberate reason for it. that’s not how. no. at least make the blue more washed out or something if you have to make both scenes blue.

I’m going to take video editing software and alter the lighting/color overlays of every scene in this movie.

I won’t do that but I want to. disney has done so good in the past with color theory and this is hurting me.

okay so ironically, I’ve heard a lot of complaints from various sources about what they did to Be Prepared, but honestly this is the only scene so far that’s really worked for me. it’s so much less uncomfortable with the visual style for him to be mostly speaking the lines in an understated menacing kind of way and it all came together really nicely. I haven’t liked all of Scar’s scenes so far but he’s definitely my favorite thing they’ve done here on average. also for some reason they don’t seem to be as afraid of giving him movement and expressions as with the other characters, maybe it’s just that he’s already the most visually distinctive idk.

anyway, Be Prepared was good and I genuinely enjoyed watching it, they should have done that with the first song if they weren’t going to do something crazy and colorful. critics were wrong. water is wet.

the voice acting in this movie really is just all over the place. it’s scanning like an elder scrolls game where the actors were just given most of their lines out of context in alphabetical order or something. because now we have “stampede in the gorge! Simba’s down there!!” [acted well but blank expression] “Simba?” [spoken in a tone that implies “oh, is that rascal in the gorge? interesting” and not “are you telling me my son is about to be trampled by ungulates???”] and I can’t tell how much is actually weird acting and how much just seems weird because it’s matching up badly with the animation.

so the action shots are good, they can do action, it’s just when they’re standing and talking that it gets awkward.

I think the reason Scar works for me more than the others is that all his concern and intentions are fake and we know that so if a line/animation falls flat it matters less.

the wildebeest scene is actually pretty okay, again because it’s mostly action. I can live with it.

don’t like the delivery of “long live the king” but at this point whatever

I already knew it wasn’t going to match the emotional impact of the original death scene because honestly what would, but this was a really unfortunate time to go back to not animating any facial expressions. simba’s voice actor is just giving it their all but visually they’re giving me nothing here.

Scar’s voice acting is fascinating, half the time the actor sounds completely checked out but when his lines land they land really well, so now I’m starting to think he was just given bad directions.

the extra scenes that weren’t in the original are like, noticeably better than the others. it’s almost like realism has a time and a place and can work well when you aren’t trying to remake a cartoon scene for scene with it. I suspect this is why I liked the jungle book so much but am not having a good time watching the lion king at all.

I rest my case about action shots: Timon and Pumbaa still don’t have facial expressions for the most part but they never stop moving and bounce around like cartoons, so it doesn’t look weird that they’re talking.

WHY DID SIMBA REACT WITH MORE VISIBLE FEAR TO PUMBAA SINGING THAN HE DID TO A WILDEBEEST STAMPEDE

kind of living for Timon’s inexplicable but honestly fitting gay lisp

again, everything around these two is more cartoonish and it works. so. much. better.

did they just fucking change animation teams entirely after the stampede or something.

the lions’ voice actors still really need to tone down their singing in comparison to the animations though, this is why be prepared was the only one that’s really worked. I mean it’s really good singing but that’s sort of the problem. to quote deadpool, they’re singing at eleven but we need like a five or six.

on the other hand I can’t believe we got that whole extra scene and Nala is literally voiced by Beyonce but they still didn’t put in Shadowland.

this is honestly going so much better than the first act because it’s not a shot-for-shot remake anymore and they’re actually writing their own scenes that, obviously, work better with the medium. I really hope it continues like this.

except for the fact that simba still just stares blankly at everything, that’s not great.

please. make a facial expression.

we’re back in “scenes that happened in the original movie” land and it is not a happy place.

there’s no iteration of this scene I can watch without thinking about the rafiki vine

god FUCKING damn it there was exactly ONE SCENE in the ENTIRE movie that SHOULD have been remade word for word and you CHANGED THE ENTIRE TONE OF THE SCENE. WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS. WHY WOULD YOU MESS WITH REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE. THAT SCENE FELT LIKE A RUINED SNEEZE.

FUCK;.

I’m so mad. it was finally starting to be a fun movie to watch and they did that. did they honestly think “I will always be proud of you son” would ever have the impact of “you are more than what you have become”

simba stop talking.

everyone stop talking you’ve already talked all the emotional impact out of this scene.

the soundtrack and new scenes are absolutely wasted on the entire rest of the movie. the travel montage is good but I’m still mad about the mufasa thing.

and let me be clear I’m cool with the visual decisions with the clouds that everyone’s mad about, that was fine if slightly too subtle. the problem is that they altered and drew out the dialogue in such a way as to completely defang the whole scene.

we’re still not gonna explain why the hyenas are bad or how Scar managed to cause a massive drought just by overhunting huh.

I can’t believe he’s hoarding all the food AND all the facial expressions for himself.

okay look disney you can’t just shoehorn a Girl Fight into every movie and call it feminism. what history do Nala and Shenzi even have to warrant this dialogue.

why did they put the simba/king music as a backdrop to rafiki beating up hyenas, this feels like when they used the nazgul theme for thorin in the hobbit. I’m at the point where I keep thinking “okay I’m just gonna stop typing and watch the rest and be done” but they keep doing weird shit.

good job nala you defeated your lifelong arch nemesis, the hyena you were once in the room with while she talked to someone else

again, the action shots are good. the problems arise when they start saying words at each other.

this movie has a big “people yelling lines that need to be said quietly for maximum impact” problem

in all sincerity this is badass now that they’ve stopped talking

this would be a better movie if it wasn’t the lion king.

Simba defeated Scar and absorbed his ability to have facial expressions, wild.

all right final two scenes are exact reshots of the original but blander, and we’re done

holy shit that’s too many producers that explains a lot

okay well it was okay for a while in the middle and the bits where they actually added new things and/or exercised some creativity, and I kinda liked the reimagining of Timon and Pumbaa, but this went about as expected. it’s not like it’s a horrible movie or anything but if I was gonna show a kid the lion king I would show them the original because it flows better, it’s more visually appealing, and you can actually tell characters apart at a glance. also they used color theory properly.  seriously who let that get by. you are more than what you have become, disney.

anyway this movie’s biggest flaw is that it didn’t need to exist in the first place and the people who made it exist anyway were goddamn cowards about it thanks for coming to my ted talk.

[astra-storm]

Astra Lost in Space Review - Ep 01: Welp, there Goes My Feels

As you can probably tell from my username, I am a huge fan of this series. I can’t count the number of times I’ve reread this manga. Not too hard to do since it’s relatively short, but still. I was looking forward to watching the anime adaptation and it did not disappoint! That said, this will be kept spoiler-free from future parts of the manga, of course. 

The Good Stuff

I really like how they started off with Aries floating in space, because it just adds to a lot of the tension, thinking ‘oh hey how did she get up to space’. Then when you finally get to the strange sphere you think ‘oh. shoot. so that’s how’. 

Voice acting - excellent! I loved everyone’s voices! Whenever I read Astra previously I always had Kanata’s voice as the guy who voices Bossun from Sket Dance, purely because of having the same mangaka and they look kinda similar. Am definitely down with Kanata’s voice though, as well as everyone else’s.

Music/sound direction - oooooooof I love the opening. The soundtrack seems excellent too so far, and I like how they played around with the sound effects for the space scenes. Especially, when Aries’ comms malfunction. 

Visuals - Am a fan of the look. I remember being slightly worried because Kenta Shinohara’s art has so much quirkiness to it when it comes to the characters’ expressions, that it wouldn’t translate well to anime visuals, but I think that so far they’re doing an okay job. 

Characters/plot - uhhhhhhhhhh I’m too big of a fan to have anything but good words about this because of my hindsight. I just want to thank Shinohara-sensei for gifting us with Astra. I suppose I think the anime makes Aries and Kanata very likeable from the get-go (though I felt that from the manga too). What the anime did do was give the other characters a bit more spotlight so you do get attached to them too. FUNI IS SO CUTE. 

Worldbuilding - the background detail, especially in the airport, was really nice. I saw some things that made me go ‘oho, I see, I see’. I see what you did there. 

Humour: so uhh I have that sket dance sense of humour so I found it funny anyway but I thought that they executed the jokes well too. I credit the voice actors a lot for that.

The New Stuff

Ohohoho, so they put in the info from the volumes about the suits, which made me smile, I do love having those and maybe they’ll have more of that in the future.

Having Kanata’s anti-grav shoes break when they arrive on McPa...a nice small additional detail that works 

Expansion on the backstory Kanata has with his teacher was another excellent addition - it gives the watchers such a clear understanding of the motivations behind Kanata’s actions oof. I love the visuals for those flashback scenes and how strongly it works for tying into the rescue.

Kanata getting back Ulgar’s bag...a nice little additional interaction which is appreciated from me. I love all of them.

The hand holding scene for when Kanata and Aries come back, ooh, that was a scene. Teamwork makes the dreamwork. And I only realised that it was a nod towards the volume covers later (despite owning them lol). This works for me emotionally. 

Oh and Funi grabbing hold of Quitterie’s hand beforehand AHHHHH. I loved seeing more of the crew’s reaction a lot, it’s just....they deserve that screentime, they really do. 

The other hand-holding scene....uhh, again, I love all of them and seeing them all hold hands was great. Especially that part where Ulgar was going to go emo by himself and Funi was being her cute self and the other kids were like ‘you can’t say no to this 10 year old’ and Ulgar’s like fineeee okay. 

The Slightly Less Good Stuff (though mostly ignorable)

The black bars/panelling is...a bit weird. I think I’ll get used to it but it did seem unfitting at some points. It does make some scenes more dramatic and cinematic though.

UHHHHH. THE HAND HOLDING SCENE FOR RESCUING ARIES MEANS SHE LEFT ALL HER STUFF FLOATING IN SPACE. So what clothes are she going to wear then? Is she just going to borrow stuff from the other two girls (aka Quitterie cause Yun-Hua’s too tall)?  

ISo the holding hand scene works emotionally but not so much logically...because if the cable floated too far away, someone could have reeled it back it and gone out to grab the two as they approached closer, which would be safer than the human-chain. lmao okay fine leaving her stuff just bothers me, I’ll admit it.

This is also a slight manga issue, but uh...Zack could’ve...maybe...piloted the ship closer to Aries. Though we can also argue maybe Aries had a limited air supply so there would not be enough time to get it running and all that and they didn’t know if they could fly it at the time. Just a tiny thing I thought about, but it’s fine since they’re in a panicked situation.

Maybe we’ll get a small line saying how Zack did pilot it closer to retrieve Aries’ stuff (though we saw Kanata’s.tablet left floating so uh...maybe we won’t). 

Again while the 2nd hand holding scene works emotionally (I did gif it and all, and I do like it...enough to have tears lol), I don’t like how it kinda takes away how going to the planets was Aries’ idea. That part of the manga emphasises a bit more that though Aries is a bit ditzy, she’s also good with coming up with ideas. though looking at the opening, I think we’ll get something for Aries in that aspect later   

They also missed that bit where they had to expand the parameters for planets they could go to...which made it seem a bit easy...though I suppose Zack could again just have another line later saying he allowed for harsher parameters to complete the route. 

Okay last nit-pick but that scene where Ulgar was like ‘huh why is Kanata so strong’ could have been nice to keep but fine fine.

Overall

Huh. Well my negative section was slightly longer than I thought, even though I actually loved this first episode a whole lot. Guess this is what happens when you’ve read these panels a bunch of times. The different things are very easy for me to notice, I suppose and I think this probably goes the same for fellow manga-readers. Though I do think if I watched this anime-only the changes would pull me in a bit more, as the pacing would fit the medium easier, whereas when you’re reading, you’ll blast through the chapters and get the development quicker. I’ve already rewatched the first episodes a few times so when I say I did love it, I do mean it, so I’m looking forward to seeing how the rest of the anime develops. Thanks for reading!