#it’s a very small window where it works

[cornflowersisblue]

To the Bathroom, Without Me?

Mr. Gap X Fem reader Tags: Lovesickness for a dark-haired boy from another world with p#rnographic c#ntent. Words: 2000

Full version on AO3 You let out a tired sigh as you sank into the hot water, feeling the tension of the long day begin to melt away. Warm steam rose into the air, settling on the tiled walls and creating a soft mist around you. Your day at work had been utterly exhausting, so when you returned home, you couldn’t even follow your usual routine and simply tossed your things on the bathroom floor as you undressed. Your eyes closed as you took a deep breath, enjoying the long-awaited warmth. It had been a very cold day for November, and you were freezing on your way home. That’s why the water in the bath was hotter than usual.

But suddenly, a strange chill ran through you, as if a cold wind slipped into the room. You opened your eyes and flinched when you saw Mr. Gap right in front of you. His sudden appearances were something you could never get used to, no matter how often they happened.

Mr. Gap didn’t seem to care about anything. He enjoyed simple things like watching lazily or teasing someone now and then. He didn’t feel tied to anything. He was lying right in front of you now, shamelessly stretched out between your legs. His dark hair fell forward, covering his left eye, while his right eye studied you closely. He rubbed his cheek against your damp leg, his hair slightly wet and sticking to his pale skin.

He was also pleased that his body was restored, with all its parts in place. Though out of old habit, or maybe because it was more comfortable for him, he only showed his head. In moments like today. You saw him in the reflection of your office window. His ghostly face and a grin from ear to ear scared your boss so much she turned pale. She stopped scolding you, even though she clearly had a lot to say, and quickly left the office. Did Mr. Gap do it on purpose? Or was he just having fun?

His dark lips curved into a smirk. Now he appeared fully, pressing down on you with his weight. In the soft, warm light of your bathroom, he looked almost harmless. His face was strangely handsome, with a slightly upturned nose and a sharp chin. Of course, his large light-gray eyes, framed with thick black lines, stood out sharply against his pale skin. Long, slender fingers with black nails lazily trailed across your stomach, leaving behind a familiar faint chill. Your eyes followed his hand, drawn to its slow movement, as though he was lost in his thoughts too.

"Warm," he said softly. His voice was pleasant, with a slight rasp, like that of a young man—not too deep, but not high either. "It’s cold... out there." He lifted his head and nodded toward the small bathroom window. It was fogged up from the steam, making it hard to see through, but you knew it was still snowing outside. You gave a slight nod, understanding what he meant.

"Give me your finger?" he asked, raising his eyebrows with such a fake and innocent expression that it was almost pitiful. His face always vividly conveyed every emotion, and he knew how to use that to his advantage.

You lifted your hand out of the water and offered it to him. You remembered your first meeting with him. There were two identical gray doors in front of you, and without thinking, you reached for the one on the right. Behind the handle was his face. It was terrifying. You slammed the door shut right in his face with a loud bang and ran away, hoping he wouldn’t follow. But the longer you stayed in that strange place, where everything seemed to want to kill you, the more you realized you needed help. You knew nothing about that world. You just ran aimlessly from room to room, from hallway to hallway, your heart sinking at the thought of what might be hiding behind the walls. Or above you. Or under the floor. Then you remembered a book. It had a strange illustration that stuck in your mind: the eye of a creature peeking out from a crack in the wall. Creatures like that were described as watchers who didn’t cause much harm. They were said to serve as a reminder to take care of your home.

Yeah, right. A real spirit of cleanliness who loves water.

You smiled as he leaned closer, his thin fingers wrapping around your wrist and lifting your hand to his face. His lips curled into a thin smile every time he got what he wanted. He bit the tip of your finger with his sharp teeth, then ran his tongue over it. You brushed your thumb against his lower lip.

"Hello, Mr. Gap," you finally said, running your hand through his hair and letting your fingers slide down his back. He let go of your hand, shifted slightly, and made himself comfortable.

"Am I your pillow now?" you asked with a small smirk.

He reached out, stretching for something behind your head.

"Not understand your language," he reminded you. His fingers closed around a red candle. He turned it over in his hands, studying it for a moment. Then, pressing two fingers together, he lit the wick. The flame flickered softly, its warm light reflecting in his pale gray eyes. Continue reading on AO3

[marzipanandminutiae]

Do you have any advice on making a living working in historic preservation? I feel like every opportunity in the field (ex. Local historical societies) is volunteer work, which I do, but I also need money!

:)

:) :) :) :)

I am so sorry but you've hit upon the main employment problem with this field: it is wildly underpaid. Especially if you want to do something with museum content/collections/preservation rather than admin.

The issue is, this system (at least in the US, where I live) started out in the late 19th century being run by people who had a lot of free time and a LOT of money already. Married upper-class women, rich men- often gay, interestingly enough -with academic turns of mind, etc. They didn't need the money, so they built a structure designed to function that way. And for many years a lot of this work continued to be done by volunteers.

Except then people came along with the audacity to want to make a career out of it. Without enough generational wealth to not need payment! Oh no!

So now there are not enough full-time jobs in the field for people who want them, unfortunately. They're out there! But you might have a hell of a time getting into one.

I'd say to look for bigger orgs over small ones, or small orgs in big cities. We love a tiny house museum in the middle of nowhere, but they often have the smallest budgets in a world of small budgets. Also, consider starting out part-time and trying to work your way up (just make sure the org has full-time employees first). Making connections is paramount- I've only had part-time museum jobs so far, but I never got a single one just by applying online. You can, but it helps a lot to have someone say "hey, the Fancyman-Spinsteracademic-Wepromisewe'rereckoningwithslaverynow House is hiring; want me to put in a good word for you?"

Alternately, learn some hands-on preservation skill like carpentry or horology (working with mechanical clocks- PLEASE learn horology if you go this route; all the horologists are 80 and they keep dying) could be a way to get specific talents that historical site museums can't function without and will therefore pay for when the budget allows. In cities with lots of historical architecture that they actually care about preserving- so not NYC, apparently -there are often independent companies that specialize in different aspects thereof. Historical window repair, historical plastering, historical brickwork maintenance, etc. Trying to get hired by one of those is a way to go into preservation without working in museums. Private auction houses or antiques dealers can also be an option, if you're more into the Collections Objects side of things.

I don't mean to make it sound bleak. My eight-year career in museums has been entirely part-time collections/interpretation/admin jobs stitched together, and while I'm sick of the "underpaid and relying on my parents to pay for my insurance" aspect (yes, I freely admit it; I'm a lowkey continuation of the Can't Work In Museums If You Don't Have Family Financial Support tradition and very very lucky to be able to do what I do, and yet even I'M frustrated and tired and over it), it is deeply fulfilling work that I consider highly worthwhile and important. And there ARE avenues to make a decent living in it!

I just want to explain the phenomenon you're seeing and give you realistic expectations.

Best of luck!

[taesanfairy]

love at first sight | p.s

MDNI 18 + 🐧

wc : 1.4k

smut tags : unprotected sex (don’t do it), grinding, phone sex, just sex really. 💌

you were on vacation in japan with your mom, today you were in kamakura, japan. so far it was your favorite place in the world, everything about it screamed you. it was a small town near the beach, the entire time felt like a fever dream, it was so perfect for you.

it had become lunch time by the time you arrived to kamakura so you and your mom walked around until you found a cute ramen shop. when you entered you could see the beach through the windows, it had a cozy type of vibe, and it was warm. even though it was summer you were craving some ramen, and you're in japan so of course you had to get some. to order your food, you had to order on a machine, and then you were seated.

the boy who had seated you gave you butterflies, he was so pretty, almost as pretty as a jellyfish. he had a sharp jawline, fluffy dark hair, very attractive eyebrows, and just perfectness. as you were seated you couldn't keep your eyes off of him, he was exactly your type. He welcomed you and your mom as she told him in chopped japanese we speak english. he smiled at you and then tried to speak to you in english. even his voice was pretty, you were falling hard over a server, in a foreign country. he walked away to work but even as he walked away his eyes couldn't stop looking at you.

when he delivered your food, you ate it fast. maybe it's biased to think it was the best ramen you've ever had since there was a cute waiter but it was really fucking tasty. when you both finished your food the server came over and cleaned the table. when you left the ramen shop, your heart was racing.

walking back to the place you were staying you couldn't stop thinking about him. your mom had been talking about how good the food was but you couldn't help but only think about him. after a while you stopped thinking about him, enjoying your trip.

the next day you had convinced your mom to go again, maybe not fully telling her you want to go for the boy but it was tasty. when you entered the ramen shop he greeted you both with a smile and a wave. he was getting into your heart faster and faster. you both ordered what you had gotten the previous day and ate it until you both were full. when he came to get your bowls he smiled at you, almost flirtatiously.

over the week you couldn't stop thinking about him hoping you could have you anime romance moment but nothing seemed to show up for you. as your mom and you were walking to get some conveyer sushi he passed by you. he took a double look and waved at you, he was about to ride off but he gave you a smile and biked off. like seiji amasawa hehe.

when you went back one last time you asked for his number as your mom was distracted. he smiled at you and wrote down his number and his name.

xxx-xxx-xxxx park sunghoon.

the boy you had fallen head over heels for was named park sunghoon.

when you and your mom traveled back to tokyo you messaged sunghoon. you both used google translate to talk to each other, but it seemed that both people had fallen for the other. You both spent hour and hours talking to each other until one night he confesses to you.

“y/n、 私はあなたが好きです (watashi wa anata ga sukidesu) I like you”. He said over the phone. By this time you were both on the other side of the world (depending on where you live). Even though you had both been speaking to each other your heart still couldn’t handle what he had said to you. it was like a dream, and then you both started going out, online yes but you both knew it was true love.

over time you both fell harder and harder wanting to go farther together, and here you were on the phone with him, but differently this time. Over time you both became better at the opposing language, speaking more fluently together. you  had your legs spread, dripping from arousal. the call had become heated quickly, only over a few sentences about how you missed each other. sunghoon turned on his video camera and showed you what he was doing, thinking about you, his hand slowly gripped his shaft as he was easing the pain of his erection. you whimpered out trying to hold in your noises but you couldn’t help but imagine every inch inside of you. when you turned on your camera you showed how wet you had become over the dirty talk. you could see sunghoon smirking through the phone, proud of what he was making you feel. he gripped his shaft, letting out a low groan and asked you to touch more. you smiled at his chopped english and traced your fingers around your folds, teasing the tips of your fingers to your sopping pussy. he moved the phone closer to his bulge showing you how hard he had become. you whimpered at how big he looked, and how pretty his fingers looked wrapped along his long length. you placed the camera so he had full view of your entire body, you had taken off your shirt to show off your chest. he threw his head back, thrusting hard into his hand. he had cum into his hand, moaning as you messed with your perk nipples. he showed the mess he made as you came close. cumming all over your hand, you showed him and you both took deep breathes.

“goodnight baby, i love you” sunghoon said while hanging up

a few months later, sunghoon got the chance to work in (country you live in), due to his english improving and always wanting to go there. you smiled happily, you were finally able to be with the boy you fell hard for. he wasn’t planning on moving for a few months but he was worth the wait.

(seven months later)

sunghoon exited his plane looking for you, fixing his hair, checking he looked good (please he always does). when he saw you he walked faster, but not running, as an introvert he didn’t want to cause a scene. when he had you in his arms he nuzzled his nose into your neck. you walked him to your car and pulled him into the driver’s seat, seating yourself onto his lap. he groaned at the impact, and the weight on his crotch. His hands made their way to your hips, grinding you into him. he pulled you into a heated kiss, you smiled and pulled back.

“we should probably head to my house instead of doing it here.” you say. He nodded and moved into the passenger seat. as you drove to your house your hands wandered over to sunghoon’s body. you rubbed him through his pants and felt how big his length was. 

when you arrived home you led him up to your room, seating yourself on your bed. you laid down and he pulled you up again. he smiled, but you could see the desire floating in his eyes. sunghoon kissed you again but softly, completely different from earlier. sunghoon pulled you onto his lap and held you, like a glass doll he didn't want to chip.

as you both became hotter and hotter he touched you more. you pulled back and drank in his entire presence, zipper undone, hair messy, lips puffy, and a very visible bulge. he kissed you with more want this time. he lifted his hips so he could take his pant off, your eyes grew at his erection pushing against his boxers.

"i'm not even going to lie to you, i prepped myself before picking you up" you say. he blushes at your words nodding. he removed his boxers as you removed your own clothes. you spread you folds to show sunghoon, and he placed his cock on the exposed skin. you whimper as he brushed against your clit, arching your back. he then entered you, his thickness causing you to see stars. when bottomed out he whimpered, you were so fucked out, the boy you've wanted was deep inside of you. he then started up a pace, fucking you the way he's been waiting for. your high came fast and surprised you, as he felt you pulse around him he rubbed your clit, pleasing you further.

after multiple rounds he set you down and laid next to you. you then both drifted off to sleep, finally together. <3

so the real event was there was a cute waiter. like he was fucking adorable. i met him in kamakura at the ramen shop. i added romance to it but i was like 16 at the time and he was probably 18 maybe 20, yes i went back twice to see him and also passed him on his bike. he was so fine. anyways nothing actually happened but he will forever be in my heart <3

[pthalogreenwriter]

Trouville Limerence - Chapter 2

A/n: Hi! I am hoping to do weekly(ish) updates so chapter 3 will come next week! If you would like to be in the taglist, let me know and I will add you immediately!

Link to Ch 1

P.S I wrote this when i was high so bare with me

Wc: 3.5k

Summary: Hitman/Assassin!Gojo x Reader where he's very Yandere but doesn't want to kill you, he is genuinely obsessed with you.

Warning: creepy Gojo, stalking, lowkey delusional

Gojo hit the gas pedal and quickly tried to park his car. His eyes almost ceased to leave the sight of you but he needed to walk if he wanted to know where you were going. He parked along the street you crossed from and locked the car without looking back. 

He would’ve lost you in the crowd of people if Gojo didn’t already have your scent ingrained in his brain. He focused his senses, following the smell of clean cotton and lotus as he sped through the crowd. Soon, he was able to find you, still hurrying along the street to wherever your destination was. You wore a white button up long sleeve, tucked in a khaki skirt that stopped right below your knee. Formal but inconvenient in the moment of haste. 

He made sure to keep a good distance behind you, glad not to have his blindfold on to make him stand out. There were dozens of people around the street, and you flew right past them, head down and determined. You wouldn’t even have noticed him if you weren’t in a hurry. 

Gojo didn’t know what his goal was. He didn't know if he was going to speak to you, introduce himself, or want to find out where you were going. He only followed and watched. 

Minutes passed before he realized where you were running off too. You ended up in a pastel blue bakery on the corner of a street, its windows aligned with white tables on the inside. A bell rang as the door opened, Gojo being able to hear it in front of a store a few doors down. 

Satoru was at an impasse. He could either go in, introduce and talk himself up as he usually did or he could walk away. 

I can’t just walk up to a stranger anymore. I don’t know anything about her. 

With the door closed to the bakery, Gojo could still smell you, stronger than the made desserts you were rushing to. He wanted to look at you more but you left his view. He stood in front of the nearby store, taking a breath and ready to walk away. And then he heard you. 

You spoke with rushed kindness, your voice consuming all that he could hear around him. He knew even if he tried, Gojo wouldn’t be able to block out your voice, your smell, you. You were intoxicating and he got addicted fast. This frustrated him. 

He followed his frustration, crossing the street to see if he could get a better view through the windows of the cafe. This worked, watching your side profile move as you were talking to the girl behind the counter. Hearing your voice and  watching the way you carried yourself was more consuming than the smell of you. Gojo couldn’t walk away now. 

The baker walked away to get your order as Gojo noticed the small gleam of sweat he smelled on your body earlier had disappeared. The clean cloth scent in the air grew stronger every time you looked at your phone for the time, you were nervous. 

Satoru Gojo did not understand why he could sense you from far away so strongly when everyone else didn’t affect him like this. When people were in close proximity, he blocked them out. Prior to learning control, he would have smelt what someone had for breakfast that morning hours after or hear a baby crying in the middle of the night 7 doors down . These were what his younger teen years felt like. Overwhelming and almost painful to learn control. 

This felt as if he was a teen again, unable to not feel everything around him and drown in it. Except the only thing he could sense was you, and he found himself letting it take over his breath easier than usual. 

His sight worked for him well here. He saw the lady come back behind the counter with a large box that matched the color of the store. You paid for the order and picked it up, securing your small purse around your shoulder. You didn’t struggle with the box when you left the store and weren't as in a rush as when you got there. Instead of running, you sped walk, slower than your earlier scurry. 

When you left the store and started going back the way Gojo found you, he crossed the street again and kept the same amount of distance and people in between the both of you as there was earlier. You still didn’t notice him, focused on the way back to your destination before you were too late. 

Gojo took this time to further wonder what he was doing. He wasn’t sure what he wanted from you, if he was going to meet you he would’ve done it at the bakery. This is what he repeated in his head to try to stop himself from following you further. 

To no avail, he followed you all the way to your goal. Less and less people were on the street, the normal lunch time for work coming to a conclusion. Satoru slowed his pace, not wanting it to be obvious to others that he was on your trail. He still had a good view of you from where he was lurking behind. Since there were less people, he took this opportunity to guess where you were going. He didn’t have much time to, coming to a halt when you made a turn. 

Saitama Urami East Junior High

He read the stone plaque that was carved with the school name as you hurried past it and up the stairs. No one else was around, indicating classes had already started. You were still in a rush not noticing Gojo behind you at the school entrance. At this moment Gojo realized what you were rushing to. 

She’s a teacher.

This was great in Gojo’s eyes. The best case scenario this could’ve been. You knew how to handle children, had a clean record, and liked sweets. Perfect.

The fresh cotton smell was leaving him the more you walked away, it made him want to yell out for you to stop. He couldn’t though, not when you were already running late to class. 

Satoru turned on his heel and quickly walked away back to his car. He replayed the journey in his head, wrapping his mind around the fact that no matter how hard he tried, he never had the will to walk away. After the bakery, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to anymore. 

The idea of having you in his life didn’t frighten him as much as it did before when you were a stranger. Gojo outwardly huffed at the idea of that, sounding ridiculous as if he’s known you for years. Sure, he still didn't know your name but it wouldn’t be hard to find out. His job and abilities made it easy for him to find almost anyone he wanted, and you being a teacher was not an exception. 

He got to his car in a short amount of time, too eager to not drive back to the school. His plan was to wait in his car for classes to finish for the day and wait for you to get out of work. 

And then what? 

Gojo kept asking himself this question while waiting those few hours for you. He didn’t know what, but he knew he couldn’t come up to you after following from the bakery. He wasn’t blind of the fact that it was creepy of him to wait near a school for a teacher to come out either. He was at a loss for words of what to say if he went up to you. 

The thought of his current work assignment has ceased to pop up in the contractor’s head as you never left his mind. You overpowered him more than he was used to, and not on purpose. The only other person that popped up in his mind was Megumi. 

She works with middle schoolers. When she meets him, she’ll be used to his shit because she works with kids like that everyday! 

When. He almost missed it. A word guaranteeing something happening, not if. What was he thinking? 

No, he can see it now. An image popped up in Gojo’s head. 

Megumi was sitting on the couch doing his homework as Gojo walked in from work, kicking his shoes to the side. His back ached from the scuffle he had with a case subject, realizing he definitely should have stretched beforehand. 

“Welcome back.” Megumi greeted him, momentarily looking at him walk through the living room. His eyes didn’t look back up until Gojo ruffled his hair, the same way he’s been annoying Fushiguro for years. A deep grunt came from the brunette and slapped the elder’s hand out the way, fixing his pointed tips then going back to his homework. “She’s in the room.” 

The bedroom door was closed but not locked. Satoru braced himself as he opened the door, his excitement and hunger eating at him and he felt giddy coming home to the both of you. He never got used to this, his heart thumping in his chest, feeling like electricity was coursing through him, charging him up for you. 

Your back was turned to him when he opened the door. You were too busy to notice him, drying your hair in the mirror from your shower a few minutes prior. 

Gojo ripped the sunglasses off his eyes, wanting to take a better look at you. He took this time to see what you were wearing, a shit-splitting grin growing on his face. You were in his pastel blue work shirt, some spots sticking to you from the undried shower water. His sweatpants would drag every time you moved your feet, his long legs making it hard to wear any bottoms of his. Yeah, he never got used to this. 

You didn’t notice him until he was directly behind you, making you jump from the sudden silhouette popping up in the mirror. He grabbed at your waist turning you around. His large hand coming up to cup the side of your neck, thumb running along the side of your cheek. Gojo inhaled, taking in everything in front of him.

The smell of Lotus got stronger, the happiness and warmth growing inside your heart. His fingers felt forbidden as they traveled along your back, making you gasp once they grasped your backside. Goosebumps were summoned on your skin as Gojo touched you, a shiver going down your spine. His aura was so cold, a complete irony to his hot touch. 

He pulled your face toward him into a hungry kiss. Your eyes fluttered close as you let him lead, tongue brushing against yours in simple devour. With every kiss, he sucked your breath into his, taking the life you had inside. Nibbling on your lip, he moaned against your mouth, especially when his hand that was over the clothes on your backside was now under them. Gojo pulled you into his body, pressing against you to feel how hard he was. This is how it was meant to be. 

But you had different plans, pulling at the hand on your face to pull away from the kiss. He took this as a chance to move his mouth along your check to your neck, lifting you with ease with the one hand on your ass. You whimpered as your hands pushed against his shoulders, releasing his hold from his mouth and hands moving back on the clothes. 

“Satoru, no, not now. I’m going to help Megumi with his essay and make us some food.” He still had you pressed against him as spoke, his face still dangerously close to yours. You wanted to but you couldn’t, you had things to do. 

“Let me order. You’ll be done by the time the food gets here and then I can have you all to myself.” He nuzzled into the side of your face as he spoke, both hands now gripping your ass tight and watching the way it fit in his hands in the mirror. 

You hummed at the thought, not wanting to cook now that Gojo was here. You never ordered out for you and Megumi, him giving no indication of wanting anything else anytime you cooked dinner. And Gojo was always the one to offer, willing for you to stay in the house while he got the food. 

“Hmm okay. I’ve missed you.” Your hands went up to his undercut, scratching light at the skin underneath. Gojo fluttered his eyes closed, only seeming to get harder under your touch and making his knees feel like jello. This didn’t go by you, “You missed me too.”

You kissed his lips once more and then stepped away from him, picking up the towel you dried your hair with. You giggled as he pouted, his grasp left empty as when he first walked into the room. Gojo couldn’t help but smile though when you gave him another kiss on the check before leaving the room. You adored him and he knew it. 

You joined Megumi on the couch, Gojo following you back to the living room and leaned against the side wall. He watched you both, talking and working on the essay. Fushiguro never gave you as much sass as he did Gojo, you were too nice and he spoke to you about everything. Even if he did, you never took any lip from him, calling the teen out yet worried about what was going on. Satoru couldn’t have been happier. The two most important people in his life were close with him and each other, never needing anything else but him. 

Gojo bites his lips at the thought of being close to you, hands gripping the steering wheel tight once again. He had to slow himself down and keep a level head while he waited. He needed to figure out what he was going to do once you got out of work. He needed to figure out what you were going to do once you got out of the school.

You were perfect so far, yet there was more to know. What did you do after work? Did you already have someone to go home to? Did you have any kids yourself? If you smelt like clean cotton when you were nervous, what did the lotus and the eucalyptus mean? Would you really smell like lotus if you were happy? 

Gojo would have spent all day thinking and waiting for you in his car if it meant that he would see you again. So the hours flew by yet they were painstakingly slow, the urge to hear your voice and have the sight of you in front of him fed his earlier frustration. He needed to see you. 

At the end of the school day, all the students filed out first to leave school grounds. With it being Friday, Gojo was hoping you would be out once the kids left. This would let him to really get to know you, what you do and who you see. He didn’t know when he would get this chance again, having to be home with Megumi most of the time, so he didn’t want to waste it with you being at the school all day. 

Should I have Suguru watch Megumi again next week? No, I’ll get Nanami to do it. He’ll do it if I give him one of my personal days. 

He decided to ask Nanami while he waited for you to get out of work. He probably wouldn’t answer yet, something about ‘phones being a distraction from the work at hand’ but Gojo always had his phone on. If the school called for Fushiguro, then Gojo had to be ready to answer. 

It wasn’t long after the kids left that Gojo saw you walk out the entrance you came in through. You were happier, no bakery box in hand but instead a shoulder bag for work on the side. Gojo realized the desserts must’ve been for your students when a familiar scent passed through his nose. The smell of lotus was fragrant and lush in the air, no sign of any nervousness from hours before. I was right.

You didn't take a car to work. Gojo figured that out when you had started walking far enough that he had to follow the same routine from earlier, keeping many people between you. If you ended up turning around, Gojo would be far away enough to do the same thing and act like he was looking at something else. But you didn’t and he followed you on the local train and the walk to your place. 

The trip to your small apartment building wasn’t long, actually being closer to Gojo’s house than he was to the Kaisen building. It was a wide two story building, four apartments wide. He watched you climb up the brown stairs at the side of the tan building, face neutral with thought. Your keys jingled as you unlocked your front door to get it, the stranger that followed you home standing directly underneath you below the apartment balcony. He heard the door close behind you, the lock securing in place loudly above him. Gojo let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. 

What now?

Satoru Gojo was never in this place before. He didn’t know his next move. He could go back to his car and park it nearby, but what if you leave your place while he’s gone? What if someone comes by? 

It was quiet for the first time since he left the office that day. Your door was strong enough to nearly block the lotus and clean cotton in the air, making it hard for Gojo to feel you once again. 

Feel you. He wondered what your touch would feel like on his skin, would it be the electricity he feels when he thinks about you? A shock wave that pulses throughout his body? Maybe it would feel like a head high, but passing through his bones and nerves rather than just his head. Whatever it was, he was willing to take it as long as you touched him. 

For what felt like days, but was really seven hours, Gojo stood under your doorstep in case you decided to ever leave your apartment that Friday night. He stayed in one position the whole day, legs crossed as his back leaned against the concrete wall, hands in his pockets. His eyes were closed, concentrating on what he could hear going on from behind your door. From time to time he would hear the dramatics of reality tv on your screen, or you speaking to a friend on the phone line about something funny or ridiculous a student did today. But Gojo’s favorite part was when you cooked yourself dinner. 

Oh how he wished he could have seen you. He heard you hum to yourself as you prepped the food, soon changing into whistling as you started to cook. Whatever was on the stove smelt great, still Gojo never took his focus off of you, by scent or hearing. You hummed and whistled a lazy tune, making his eyes flutter under sunglasses. What he would give to see you at peace right now. 

You didn’t leave your place again that night. The inside of your apartment went quiet after 10pm, and Gojo would only hear an occasional stir from deeper inside your apartment. He could only guess that it was you moving around in your sleep. He wished to see that too, another form of simple peace he would love to see on your face. 

After another half hour of convincing himself that you were asleep and wouldn’t leave your place, Gojo finally lifted himself from the wall. He had to walk back to his car and complete the duty that was assigned to him. His fists were clenched as he left, the force of having to walk away from your apartment hit him ever so slowly. It was a miracle he was able to leave the property, almost turning back around a few times to his now comfortable spot under your front door. 

Alas, Satoru finally remembered where he was originally going to go when he first saw you. The full warm feeling in his chest ruptured at the thought of Mahito, wanting to come back to you as soon as possible. He wanted to abandon his original plan to make Mahito suffer, knowing it would take away too much time from being with you. He couldn’t though, not letting Mahito suffer like the worst of them brought a disgust to Satoru’s mind, like he was doing an injustice to society by letting him die quickly. It would be. 

Once Gojo entered his car, the bottomless pit came back to his chest, crying at him to run all the way back and take you with him. He couldn’t, not to where he was going.

~~

Taglist: @ctmaw @alinasromanova @borntoexplore11-blog

[sunnycantaloupe]

"Since when was this marriage valid?!" Piece 3

Idia's segment

This with Idia, who was 8 when he first met you. Both of your parents were the big bosses of large companies, and sometimes they would meet in order to discuss business deals and whatnot. On these meeting days, your parents would leave you at home to be looked after by the caretaker.

One time though, after relentless begging and pleading from your end, your parents finally let you come along. The entire journey there, they drilled it into your head how important it was that you didn't eat anything from the Island of Woe. Of course, they packed food for you to eat, but they made it very obvious that if it wasn't what they packed, then you weren't supposed to consume it. Unfortunately, they never told you why.

When you two met, you were polar opposites. He was very quiet, but a good listener as you yapped about anything that came to mind. You went on about how cool his hair looked, about how everything in his foyer looked so new and interesting, basically anything you could talk about. It wasn't very surprising when Idia felt himself getting attached to you through the means of a harmless childhood crush.

He got a lot of pride out of your compliments, so in an effort to gain more praise he told you to follow him. You didn't leave the foyer, but it was like you guys were playing as spies as he led you to a hidden cabinet. Opening it, he pulled out a bag of fruit flavored candies. Your parent's stern warning immediately flew out the window as you readily accepted the sweets, Idia giving you a small handful before grabbing some for himself and swiftly putting the bag away.

The day went on, and at one point the attendant meant to be watching you gave you and Idia some cake, provided by your parents as a snack. You both enjoyed your cake, until a memory played through your head.

It was the memory of you asking your parents about marriage and how they met. They very happily told you all the details, oblivious to your growing fascination. At that moment, you asked Idia for some paper and a crayon, and upon receiving the items you got to work. After signing the fake marriage certificate you drew, you told Idia your idea and expressed your desire to recreate it. Idia shyly agreed, also signing the paper.

Then, when you both quickly finished your cake, you called over the worker. Waking up with a start, they came over, not expecting you both to break your plates on the floor. The worker, horrified, quickly notified both sets of parents. Soon after, you were brought home and grounded. Though, your parents were notably pale after you mentioned all the fun your had with Idia, especially when you let it slip that he gave you candy. From that day forward, you had to have bitter tasting "medicine" alongside your meals, and you never went back to the Island of Woe.

...

20 years have past, and a now 28 year old Idia is running S.T.Y.X. Life had been drab, the last time he had interaction with someone that wasn't a worker being his years at Night Raven. He was even beginning to miss those normies because of all the noise that was in his life at the time. With all these memories, he never forgot you either.

As the years passed, his small crush on you dwindled to the point where it was but an embarrassing memory from his childhood. Though, he couldn't help but wonder how you were. When he had the free time (which was very uncommon), he would have the passing thought about what might've been happening in your life. Though he didn't see you in that child-like heart lens anymore, he still hoped you were doing good in life. A small part of him hoped that you remembered him too.

Speaking of, you did. You did remember him too, and you also hoped he was doing good in life. You didn't know why, but during the colder parts of the year, you really wanted to go back to the Island of Woe. You couldn't place why, and you knew it wasn't because of you simply wanting to see your "friend" again. You also noticed that this feeling only started after you began taking the "medicine" your parents gave you. You asked for answers, but you weren't given any, and the argument that ensued exhausted you enough to drop the subject.

One day, or should I say night due to how late it was, you were leading a meeting as the head of the company you inherited. It was 11:50pm when you finally remembered that you had to take your "medicine". There were times when you were allowed to skip it, so you thought you could just...yaknow...skip it. Your parents were there in the meeting however, and they were very insistent that you take your medicine, right now, at this very moment.

In an attempt to calm them down, you reached for your mug. Pouring the medicine in, you were about to pick up your mug to take a drink when you accidently dropped it due to a sudden cramp in your wrist. You had been typing relentless the past few hours in preparation for this meeting, so you didn't get the chance to let your wrist rest. Your parents stared in uncharacteristic horror as the mug fell, and just as you were about to question their behavior, the air in the room shifted.

One moment, you were staring at your parents in shock and disbelief at their reaction, and the next you were dropped unceremoniously in the foyer of the S.T.Y.X Headquarters. You saw a boy at the door, looking on in confusion. You asked him how you got here, but he just told you to wait before zipping off. Deciding to trust him, you sat on a nearby chair.

When you turned to face the door again, you found Idia in the frame as you both stared at each other in shock.

A/N: Yeah yeah I know, this was a cliche path to go for Idia's segment, but I like it and therefore I don't care :D The funfacts I made up for the MC for this segment were really fun to make though, soooo I regret nothing.

[heavenlyraindrops]

The Devil Made Me Do It | Arcane | Silco x Reader | Chapter Twelve

available on AO3 and Quotev | visit the first tag for other chapters | warnings: brief mention of alcohol, smoking, profanity

summary:

In the midst of an unfortunate run-in with the enforcers, you meet the young revolutionary Silco, and by extension, his friends Vander and Felicia. Growing close friends, you get through life in the undercity together, determined to make Zaun a better place. Until tragedy strikes, and betrayal and carelessness stabs hard enough to turn you bitter. Years later as time solidifies the scars, Silco proves to be a thorn in your side. You, in his. Hatred festers. And your world cracks further open.

Chapter Twelve:

You turned up the dark collar of your coat to shield you from the cold winds of the undercity as you and a gaggle of people briskly walked towards the Last Drop. The rain pattered onto the ground, small droplets rippling through the puddles, distorting your own reflection.

You reached the door of the bar, and for a moment you could almost see your younger self standing in that very spot.

You pulled your coat tighter around yourself, shivering lightly, and fumbled with the lighter- it wouldn’t work, despite your clicking. The door creaked but you paid it no mind.

“Struggling?”

You turned to see Silco looking at you, hand outstretched.

You pushed the thoughts away before the nausea could get the best of you and make you throw up all over your henchmen. 

The windows were flashing with light and you could hear the bustle of the night crowd from inside the building. Water rolled off of the sign and down the pipes as you looked at your men, placing a firm hand on the doorknob- then pushed the door open, stepping into the heart of the beast.

You straightened your back, going straight to the counter like it was muscle memory. You flicked your head at the bartender. “Give me something not too strong,” you said. “To calm my nerves.”

At your cold expression he nodded hastily and scrambled to get your drink ready. A presence loomed over your shoulder; you didn’t even bother to turn your head.

“Sevika,” you said smoothly. The woman put a large hand on your shoulder.

“The back,” she said flatly.

You stood up, and caught your men’s eye from across the bar. They all sauntered towards you, eyeing up Sevika. You jammed your hands in the pockets of your coat and nodded at them.

She flicked her head at you, then turned, her cloak swishing about her. You planted your feet firmly on the ground, having to raise your voice over the din.

“Where exactly are we going?” You almost-yelled. She turned. 

“There’s an office at the back.”

You froze. She raised a dark eyebrow. “Not Silco’s,” she clarified, and you relaxed, shoving past her.

“I don’t care if it’s his or not,” you sneered. She crossed her arms. 

“You sure about that?”

“One hundred percent,” you said coldly. She laughed.

“We’ll see about that.”

Now it was her turn to shove past you. You stared after her.

What the fuck was that supposed to mean?

You turned and looked at your men, jerking your head in Sevika’s direction. And then you followed her through the door.

By the time the bartender set down your drink onto the counter you were already gone. 

-

The office was gloomy, to say the least. And dark. A desk at the top, with a large window. A sofa on one side, a table on the other. Sevika flopped down on the sofa, and you crossed your arms, shifting your weight onto one leg. 

The chair at the front desk was turned around, so you could only see the back of it. Sevika looked at you. There were about three other men in the corner- Silco’s, no doubt. You sniffed disdainfully. Your own employees- the three guilty ones- were exchanging uneasy looks, glancing around shiftily. 

The office smelled of tobacco, and you noticed an ashtray on the desk. No sign of the man himself. You relaxed a little. Scowling, you went to stand in front of Sevika. 

“I’ll sit there,” you said. “You drag a chair over here.” And to mark the spot you tapped your foot.

She stared at you disbelievingly but did as you said. You leaned back, slinging an arm around the back of the couch. You needed a cigarette, you thought, and pulled one out, putting it in between your teeth. You turned your head back to look expectantly at one of your men.

He fumbled with the light before holding it beneath your roll-up. As it snapped shut you pulled the cigarette from your lips, blowing out a slow curl of smoke. You then nodded at him.

He and his friend stepped forward, grabbing the three men by the shoulders. One list and they were forced to their knees. Cries of protest arose.

“Madam-“

“-what are you-“

Silco’s men stepped forward to help but you flashed them a glare so terrifying they stepped back. You moved your eyes back to Sevika and addressed your own men.

“Fight back, and you’ll regret it,” you said lazily, eyes fixed on the woman sat in front of you. You jerked your head at Silco’s men. “I want them out.”

“But the trade-“

“It won’t be necessary.”

Her eyes narrowed in suspicion, but she didn’t say anything- simply turned to the men and nodded. They filed out obediently. She turned back to you.

“Now get on with it,” you said, lips twitching with distaste. Sevika scowled, intertwining her fingers.

“You said you take in innocent people who need a fresh start, [name],” she said steadily. Then tilted her head. “Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong.”

“Stop speaking so eloquently.” You took a drag of your cigarette. “It doesn’t suit you. Hurry up and get to the point.”

Sevika sat back, scowling, and then jabbed a finger in the general direction where your three men stood. The other two stepped away from them, to stand at your left. You frowned, cigarette dangling from your lips as you twisted around to take the papers one of your men were offering you.

The men in the corner exchanged looks, panic slowly rising. You flicked through the papers, humming. Called out a name.

“You. You said you were running from a gang that was targeting you despite your innocence.” You scrutinised the sheet, then looked up to Sevika for conformation. She rolled her eyes.

“He blew up one of our cargo ships,” she said flatly. You moved onto the next guy.

“Needed a fresh start,” you said simply.

“Stole in bulk from a shimmer factory,” Sevika said. You sniffed distastefully, and she added: “While he was with you.”

You nodded silently, moving to the last paper. “And you… you said you were saving money to pay for your sister's illness treatment but couldn’t afford rent at the same time.”

Sevika shrugged. “Cargo. Explosion. He was involved.”

The first guy, a rather scrawny looking fellow, looked at you with panic. “Madam, you won’t- what are you-“ he looked at Sevika in panic. You raised a finger to your lips, eyes glittering dangerously, and he pressed his own together, eyes wide with fear.

Sevika rolled one of her shoulders back, eyes closing as her muscles stretched deliciously. “One would think you’d keep better tabs on your employees.” She looked down at you, a clear disdain in her eyes.

You raised an eyebrow as she continued. “You just take in anyone these days? What if they take advantage of you?” She jerked her head at the men. “Like these idiots?”

“Most of the people coming to me are women and children,” you said, struggling to keep your voice at a reasonable level. “And you think I just take them in for free? They pay rent and they work.”

“You need to look into people before you take them in,” she stressed. “And you definitely need to watch what they’re doing while under your employ.”

You took a long drag of your cigarette, watching her unflinchingly. She shifted uncomfortably under your scrutiny.

“What they do outside of work is none of my business,” you said boredly.

“It comes back around to you.”

“I’ll make sure it stays their problem.” You looked at the three men and smiled sweetly. They gulped.

“Some people won’t let it be just their problem,” Sevika protested. You raised a hand, stopping her mid-lecture, and tilted your head.

“Why do you care?” Your face was perpetually unimpressed as you watched her lean back and cross her arms. “What happens to me isn’t any of your problem.”

Sevika sighed slowly. “Right, well… I suggest looking into the credibility of your employees’ stories regardless.”

“Like I said. Big words don’t suit you.” You smirked, inhaling the smoke of your fag and blowing it out slowly. “Go back to talking like an idiot.” Sevika bristled. 

“[name].”

Suddenly, you scoffed. Stubbing the cigarette out on the armrest, the fabric sizzling, you tossed the papers to the floor. A good number of people flinched.

“What makes you think I don’t look into them?” You hissed, voice dripping with venom. “What makes you think I didn’t know? You’re stupid if you think I wouldn’t take the chance to take in your adversaries. The fact that a couple of scrawny, chicken-legged boys could blow up one of your shipments is already sad enough.” You took a shaky drag of your cigarette, your leg bouncing up and down agitatedly. “And now you’re scrabbling at my feet for me to hand them over? Pathetic.” The last word was like a bullet. 

With the storm brewing in her expression you expected her to stand up and lunge at you. But then she seemed to catch something in her vision, and froze. The entire room fell silent.

Clapping.

“Bravo.” The voice was smooth, steady. Cold. A shiver ran down your spine. “That was quite the speech.”

You turned to look at the desk. The high-backed chair turned slowly.

The first thing that met your gaze was the sea-blue you’d grown so accustomed to staring at in your past. And then the chair turned fully.

You stared straight into Silco’s mismatched eyes, horrified.

Furious.

[kinokoshoujoart]

the coolest kids in forgotten valley!!☆

(…it seems there may have been a stretch of time where rock and lumina were the only kids in forgotten valley…🥲)

poseref

[sazeracs]

Adding onto this, I personally ran Salamander Dagger head on Acidic Crystal Spear handle for some poking (the City Longspear has a longer reach but is slower in a way that’s unhelpful for this fight), fully upgraded Puppet String, and the Friendship Wishstone.

The Spectre is unfortunately hit or miss in boss fights wrt actually helping, but can be useful to draw aggro and let you get some attacks in, as @venigni said, or even give you a second to breathe, and that’s definitely true here. (There’s a specific Wishstone for it but imo you don’t even need to buy it because it happens naturally lol. Caveat: This works better in some fights than others because of tracking — not recommended for Black Rabbit Brotherhood gank.) If you’re using the Friendship Wishstone, pop ✨the Cube✨ when Giangio Romeo you from the future, stronger and cooler the Spectre has about half of his health left for maximum effect.

Use Puppet String to build up stagger while he’s on all fours. He’s fairly susceptible to it; I think it was about three times I had to use it before that health bar went white. (It’s also just goated.)

For his actual attacks, although his second phase is a spicier version of the Scrapped Watchman, try approaching him like Archbishop Andreus instead. That is, stay in his face and dodge INTO him. This sounds counterintuitive and in most other fights you’ll have a bad time, but for whatever reason he’s similarly less able to hit you at that close range, and he’s more manageable if you don’t give him an opportunity to ever use his ranged attacks. Ideally, roll into him at an angle (left) so you end up on his right side (many bosses are weak here it seems), or end up going right through his legs, because most of his attack AoE is directly right in front of him — and because just like Andreus you wanna target his ass. Just completely go to town on him back there, especially if the Spectre has his attention.

His burrowing attack can be avoided by running around, but if you learn the timing to dodge or even block/parry it it’s super punishable. He telegraphs pretty obviously: hit him with a charged heavy attack when he stands up on two legs, but watch out for whenever he shakes his head in particular.

If you’re trying to hone your parrying skills, my general advice is that it’s more practical to pick one or two specific attacks and focus on mastering perfect guarding those, rather than trying to do so with everything. His Scrapped Watchman punch with the windup is a good one to learn, for instance. Remember, too, that if you’ve played other Souls games before (Sekiro especially), you may actually need to unlearn some muscle memory, because Lies of P is the opposite and the window for a successful parry is based on you, not the enemy. Generally, you want to press the block button as soon as you see an attack start to connect (i.e. a limb moving toward you) and HOLD, not tap it — if you’re early, you still get a block and can regain health by attacking.

ok i tried everything. i just can't beat him. fuck the green monster. Got the scrapped watchmen first try but this thing? even with an specter? idk. king of puppets was somehow fun and even victor was "easy" after i knew his moves. but the monster seems to have no window for a attack? he's constantly moving and I can't land a punch. for the first time i really don't enjoy this game ffs.

[keeps-ache]

i think i'm starting to really like writing again :D this will have consequences

[baejax-the-great]

So the one reason to go to Arkansas is to drive through a town named "Flippin," where everything sounds like a euphemism. Flippin Fire Dept. Flippin School. Flippin Police. Etc.

While that does sound charming, I don't know that justifies a trip to Arkansas

[luetta]

idk if people on tumblr know about this but a cybersecurity software called crowdstrike just did what is probably the single biggest fuck up in any sector in the past 10 years. it's monumentally bad. literally the most horror-inducing nightmare scenario for a tech company.

some info, crowdstrike is essentially an antivirus software for enterprises. which means normal laypeople cant really get it, they're for businesses and organisations and important stuff.

so, on a friday evening (it of course wasnt friday everywhere but it was friday evening in oceania which is where it first started causing damage due to europe and na being asleep), crowdstrike pushed out an update to their windows users that caused a bug.

before i get into what the bug is, know that friday evening is the worst possible time to do this because people are going home. the weekend is starting. offices dont have people in them. this is just one of many perfectly placed failures in the rube goldburg machine of crowdstrike. there's a reason friday is called 'dont push to live friday' or more to the point 'dont fuck it up friday'

so, at 3pm at friday, an update comes rolling into crowdstrike users which is automatically implemented. this update immediately causes the computer to blue screen of death. very very bad. but it's not simply a 'you need to restart' crash, because the computer then gets stuck into a boot loop.

this is the worst possible thing because, in a boot loop state, a computer is never really able to get to a point where it can do anything. like download a fix. so there is nothing crowdstrike can do to remedy this death update anymore. it is now left to the end users.

it was pretty quickly identified what the problem was. you had to boot it in safe mode, and a very small file needed to be deleted. or you could just rename crowdstrike to something else so windows never attempts to use it.

it's a fairly easy fix in the grand scheme of things, but the issue is that it is effecting enterprises. which can have a looooot of computers. in many different locations. so an IT person would need to manually fix hundreds of computers, sometimes in whole other cities and perhaps even other countries if theyre big enough.

another fuck up crowdstrike did was they did not stagger the update, so they could catch any mistakes before they wrecked havoc. (and also how how HOW do you not catch this before deploying it. this isn't a code oopsie this is a complete failure of quality ensurance that probably permeates the whole company to not realise their update was an instant kill). they rolled it out to everyone of their clients in the world at the same time.

and this seems pretty hilarious on the surface. i was havin a good chuckle as eftpos went down in the store i was working at, chaos was definitely ensuring lmao. im in aus, and banking was literally down nationwide.

but then you start hearing about the entire country's planes being grounded because the airport's computers are bricked. and hospitals having no computers anymore. emergency call centres crashing. and you realised that, wow. crowdstrike just killed people probably. this is literally the worst thing possible for a company like this to do.

crowdstrike was kinda on the come up too, they were starting to become a big name in the tech world as a new face. but that has definitely vanished now. to fuck up at this many places, is almost extremely impressive. its hard to even think of a comparable fuckup.

a friday evening simultaneous rollout boot loop is a phrase that haunts IT people in their darkest hours. it's the monster that drags people down into the swamp. it's the big bag in the horror movie. it's the end of the road. and for crowdstrike, that reaper of souls just knocked on their doorstep.

[knightofleo]

Finalists of the 2023 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

Dispute by Jacek Stankiewicz from Kraków, Poland: 'I caught this scene while watching birds in the Bialowieza Forest. Young greenfinch was still fed by parents. However, from time to time birds looked like having argument. My friends interpret this scene in two ways: A young naughty kid is arguing with a parent. Or one kid is reporting to the parent that its brother did something wrong: "Look he has broken the glass in the window"'

'Excuse me sir but I think you're a little too young to be smoking' by Dakota Vaccaro from Victor, United States: 'While I was working deep in the Virginian woods, a family of grey foxes took up residence under the deck of the abandoned cottage next to my work housing. One day while practicing their hunting skills on bits of moss and branches, one of the kits lunged at a small chunk of wood and started rolling around with his prize. Tired after his hunt the kit lounged on his belly still holding the wood in his mouth which gave the strong resemblance of a cigar. I was very envious of the kit at this moment cause who wouldn't want to just lay around all day relaxing'

The Rainforest Dandy by Delphine Casimir from Brussels, Belgium: 'This picture was taken in the monkey forest in Ubud, Bali. This place is a crazy place where monkeys are king! Sometimes they give a show, sometimes they climb on you to look for fleas or steal the piece of biscuit you are trying to eat'

Otter Ballerinas by Otter Kwek from Singapore: 'An arabesque smooth coated otter'

Picture me! Picture me!! by Dikla Gabriely from Yokneam, Israel: 'A brown bear in Finland who definitely did everything to make me pay attention to him and focus on him and not the other bears'

Boing! by Lara Mathews from Melbourne, Australia: 'Taken at Westerfolds Park, a beautiful and surprisingly wild pocket of land in the eastern suburbs of Melbourne, famous for its kangaroo population. The mob was enjoying some morning sunshine when this joey decided to get silly and try his hand at boxing'

Living the Moment by Kawing Chiu from Staten Island, United States: 'Relax, lay back and enjoy the warm sun... This seal is scratching its face and it is seen lying on the side while his head is supported by his flipper. This image makes the seal like the reclining Buddha statue'

[inkskinned]

what is with men being mad any time a woman raises her voice where did that even come from. someone posted a video of a small electrical explosion, and the top comment was of course the woman screams. the second comment is women try not to scream challenge, level impossible. i had to go back and watch the video again. there is, somewhat fainty, a little gasp emitted off-camera, more of a yelp than a scream. it is mostly lost in the crack of the explosion. afterwards, you hear her voice, shaken, say, are you okay?

i am helping one of my friends train her voice pitch lower, because she wants to be taken seriously at work. she and i do each other's nails and talk about gender roles; and how - due to our appearance - neither of us have ever been able to be "hysterical" in public. we both appear young and sweet and feminine. she is cisgender, and cannot use her natural voice in her profession because people keep saying she appears to be "vapid". we both try to figure out if our purposeful voice lowering is technically sexist. is it promoting something when you are a victim to it?

a storm almost sends a pole through a car window. in the dashcam, you can hear the woman passenger say her partner's name twice, crying out in alarm. she sounds terrified. in the comments, she is lambasted for her lack of calm. how is that even fucking helping?

in high school, i taught myself to have a lower voice. i had been recorded when i was genuinely (and righteously) upset; and i hated how my voice sounded on the phone speakers when it was played back. i was defending my mom, and my voice cracked with emotion. it meant i was no longer winning the argument: i was just shrieking about it.

girls meet each other after a long summer and let out a little joyful scream. this usually stops around 12-14, because people will not tolerate this display of affection (as it has the effect of being passingly annoying). something about the fact that little girls can't ever even be annoying. we are trained to examine each part of our lives (even joy) for anything that could make us upsetting and disgusting. they act like teenage girls are breaking into houses and shrieking you awake at 3 in the morning. speaking as a public school educator: trust me, it's not that bad, you can just roll your eyes and move on. it does not compare to the ways boys end up being annoying: slurs in graffiti, purposefully mocking your body, following you after you said no. you know, just boy things.

there's another video of a man who is not allowed to yell in the house, so he snaps his fingers when he's excited about soccer. the comments are full of angry men, talking about how their brother is unfairly caged. let him express himself and this is terrible to do to someone. eventually the couple has to address it in a second video: they are married with a newborn baby. he was trying not to wake the infant up. there is no comment on the fact women are not allowed to yell indoors. or the fact that it could have been really alarming or triggering for his wife. sometimes i wonder if straight men even like women, if they even enjoy being in relationships with them.

for the longest time, i hated roller coasters because it always felt inappropriate and uncomfortable for me to scream. one of my friends called me on it, said it was unusual i'm so unwilling. i had to go to my therapist about it. i don't like to scream because i was not raised in a safe situation, and raising my voice would have brought unsafe attention towards me. even when i am supposed to scream, it feels shameful, guilty. i was not treated kindly, so i lack a basic form of self-protection. this is not a natural response. it is not good that in a situation of high adrenaline - i shut up about it.

something very bad is happening, i think. in between all the beauty standards and the stuff i've already discussed - this one feels new and cruel in a way i can't quite express. yes, it's scary and silencing. but there's something about how direct it is - that so many men agree with the sentiment that women should never yell, even in an emergency - it feels different.

is the word shriek gendered automatically? how about shrill or screech? in self defense class, one of the first things they tell you is to yell, as loud and as shrilly as you can. they say it will feel rude. most women will not do this. you need to practice overcoming the social pressure and just scream.

most women do not cry out, even when it's bad. we do not report it. we walk faster. we do not make a scene. what would be the point of doing anything else? no matter what we do, we don't get taken seriously. it is a joke to them. an instagram caption punchline. we have to present ourselves as silent, beautiful, captivating - "valuable."

a woman is outside watching her kids when someone throws a firecracker at them. she screams and runs towards her children. in the comments, grown men flock together in the thousands: god. women are so annoying.

[filmstarved]

i can fix him and fuck him.

18+ [logan x female!reader]

nobody can break through logan's walls with ease like you can. and he actually lets you, welcomes it even. he needs it to breathe and when he's ready to walk out of the gifted youngsters door, there you are again.

word count: 5,737

logan sulks. he’s so devoid of love and compassion that he sulks. he’s confused most days, too. unsure of who he is and what he even wants. the people who are somehow closest to him can’t even find their way past the fire breathing dragons that guard the drawbridge to his heart. (scott jokes that he doesn’t have a heart and that the adamantium replaced it and he’s fully pumping cold, hard metal).

logan is a man who answers to himself and doesn’t give people even the slightest chance to ask him a dumb fucking question because he’s not in the fucking mood. he’s never in the mood…unless you put him in one. usually a good one.

you earn a smile from logan as easy as the sun makes it seem to rise every morning and the moon to take its place at night. it leaves the team dumfounded. they believe if you weren’t here, logan would have left a long time ago. they’re right. logan used to search high and low for any excuse to leave. he never knew where he’d go, he’d just…go. but you didn’t dare let him out of your sight. not ever since the professor had brought you to what you call home a little over a year ago now.

deep down, he wanted reasons to stay. somewhere deep inside that metal frame…he wanted things to be right again. he’d find it tiring most days to carry around his grief and anger. but you gave him reasons to stay just one more day.

“so we’re working on that thing for charles together tomorrow right?” you asked on a wednesday, standing so cutely in the threshold of his door that it was almost annoying to him.

“so we’re catching that movie downtown with ororo and hank tomorrow right? it starts at 6!” you asked on a thursday.

“heeyyy, lo…do you possibly, maybe think you could sub for scott’s morning classes tomorrow? he has a dentist appointment…,” you shyly asked on a very late sunday night. (logan heard scott’s jokes about his heart so he made you ask. logan was the only one available.)

but behind his stoic stature and intimidating glare fixed on his face accompanied by knitted brows, he’d always say yes…to you. you were his reason for staying. he knew it but would never admit it. you knew it but played the oblivious part well. and the rest of the team would gossip about it when you two weren’t around. but as long as you were here, logan has nowhere else to be.

although as of late, you’ve been busy. much busier than usual. charles has you creating plans for a mission happening soon. when you’re not teaching mutant ethics 101 to freshmen, you’re hauled up in the lab or library; sometimes darting back and forth between the two multiple times a day leaving very little time to worry about logan.

tonight, you brought your work back to your dorm. as you cleaned up a rough draft of an exit strategy, rain began to tap lightly on the window. you had lit candles littered around the room as well as grouped on your table, a small desk lamp illuminated the surface further. as you reached up to stretch your aching back muscles, you were startled by the sound of a throat clearing.

your eyes shot to the sound at your door where logan stood, leaning against the frame; arms crossed and still like he had been glued to the spot. 

“hi lo,” you say. “y’scared me, heh.” you aren’t used to logan greeting you often, especially not this late. he’s over 150 years old, of course he’s grumpy and an early bird. you’re usually the one at his door with requests and invitations to social events he assumes can be nothing short of insufferable. he sighs, his stare dropping to burn holes in the ground. “logan, are you-“

“i think i’m gonna get out of here, bub.”

those words felt like an arrow hitting the bullseye in your chest and then another splitting the first one right through the center.

“wha-what do you mean?…you’re leaving?” you asked, confusion and frustration trembling in your voice.

“it’s too hard being here.”

with that, you stood up from your chair, beelining to him. “c’mere,” you say hushed, pulling on his leather clad arm, trying to unfold them and get him out of the door frame. he doesn’t budge and you pull “the look” that you know he can’t say no to. “come sit with me please, lo.”

he unfolds his arms which allows you to grab his hands to lead him to take a load off on your bed. your bare feet pat on the hardwood floor as you quickly go back to close the door.

you walked back over to him, assessing his body language. ever since he let you use your mutation to “read him” a few months ago, you told him you’d never do it again without his permission. one gaze into his eyes and a touch of his skin and you could feel everything wracking around in his head. anxiety, rage, hate but love, pain. it was hard to feel just for a moment and your heart cracked knowing he was riddled with those feelings constantly.

but right now you couldn’t help it, he was slouched on the edge of the bed, his head dropping to rest in his large hands, and apparently ready to walk right out of the door. your powers are amplified with a touch and even more when you can look into their eyes. from a distance, you could feel a sense of unease and something else… a pressure…built up in your stomach as you surveyed your friend. it didn’t feel bad though…it felt familiar. a good familiar. you stopped reading him and did your best to shrug off the aching stomach feeling and care for your disheveled logan.

he wasn’t emotional, like ever. he hid all that, only showing you what you wanted to see; what he believed you wished him to be — happy, whatever that was. but that couldn’t’ve been farther from the truth. sure, you want him to be happy but also just whatever he wanted to feel, you wouldn’t suppress it or try to change it to fit some ideal of who people on the outside want him to be. yes, he was one of the meanest motherfuckers you had ever met but he was your mean motherfucker. (whatever that means because nothing has ever really been clear between you two).

you walked closer to him, forcing yourself in his diabolical bubble. you stood between his legs, removing his hands from his face to wrap them around your waist. you scooped your hands under his scruffy chin, pulling up to get a look into his bloodshot eyes. oh, he’d been crying.

“lo…,” you muttered. “why were you crying, wolv?” you slide a thumb across his cheek where tears had stained the skin. “why do you want to leave?”

he pulled his face away, breaking his stare with you. he dropped his head forward to rest on your stomach, wrapping his arms around your legs so his hands rested on the back of your thighs. he began to slowly rub the exposed skin of them that your very short night shorts didn’t cover. he lifted the hem of your shirt slightly to press his hot face into the soft, cool skin underneath. he hummed into it, allowing you to feel the vibration.

“logan,” you softly moaned his name under your breath. his fingers press firmly, inching closer to the crease in the skin where your ass meets thigh.

“is this okay?” he asks lowly, when he looks up for confirmation to keep going, you’re already looking down at him nodding. “say it’s okay for me to touch you like this, bub.”

“yes, keep going, logan,” you said curtly. in your voice there is a hint of need. you hadn’t been touched like this since jean’s christmas party, tipsy off spiked egg nog in the garden with a guy whose mutation was a very wet, long tongue. flirting with him seemed intriguing in the moment, but five minutes later, it rendered itself utterly useless due to user error. the sexual tension between you and logan is so potent it usually clears out a room. aside from accidental brushes of hands and quick looks at each others lips mid conversation, neither one of you has acted on it.

his hums turn to growls and soft whimpers as your hands ran through and tugged his hair. your fingers found their way to his nape, splaying out to grip the hair there in your fist. he managed to place a single kiss on the skin right above the elastic of your shorts before you pulled his head back to scrutinize his face.

“you don’t have permission to read me,” he groaned. before you could ask how he even knew that’s what you were doing he said, “you get this serious, focused look in your eyes. i can feel you in my head.”

“logan, what are we doing?” you ask, releasing his hair and stepping out of his bubble. 

his hands drop from the absence of your thighs onto his lap and his sighs frustratingly. 

“what do you mean?” he asks, admiring your body in the dim light with a semi pressing on the denim of his jeans through his boxers.

“i’m…not doing this with you…if you’re just gonna disappear from my bed before the fuckin’ sun comes up. i’m not doing this,” you said, with your hands on your hips.

he pressed his hands into his knees to push himself up to tower over you. he took two big steps forward and stood in front of you. his hand raised up to brush the back of his fingers across your cheek to cup it and rub his thumb over the warm skin. 

he pressed his lips to yours, skillfully allowing his tongue access to it. you let him. “i give you permission,” he moaned in your mouth. “read me. feel how i feel about you…how i’ve always felt about you.”

he welcomed the hesitant slip of your hands past his jacket and under his shirt, shivering and chuckling “mm, cold” into your mouth. you rested your cool touch on his hips and with his mouth obsessed with yours, you read him. 

your head dizzied instantly and the hair on the back of your neck stood up. you had never felt anything as strong as this. you could almost taste the colors in logan’s head. your heart dropped to your stomach like you were on a rollercoaster, feeling sick from adrenaline in the best ways. and then, returned that good familiar feeling. this time buried even deeper in your stomach, moving it’s way lower…and lower until logan was swallowing the noises escaping you. before you literally passed out, you dropped your hands and took back ownership of your lips and tongue. breathing heavily, you moved away from him to collect yourself.

a beat of silence followed by a heavy sigh and a “well, say something” from logan passed and you opened your mouth to speak before shutting it again.

that…was the best thing you had ever felt. no drug could compare to the euphoria that a minute of kissing logan could bring. you could practically feel yourself lubricating and your upper thighs unconsciously squeezed together as you scrambled to find thoughts.

there were none. your mind already dumb and wanting more of him…more of the feeling. your fists planted firmly on both your hips as if you were grounding yourself to the floor to avoid buckling. you eyed the ground, looked back up at him and forwarded with another heated, taking-in-each-others-breath kiss. your hands found their way to the same place gripping the hair on his nape to which he praised the tug with a moan. he supported your balance as your whines got more whiney and needy and your hands held onto him like life support.

“lay down,” he said into your kiss. it wasn’t really a command, more of a warning because he tossed you on the bed like unfolded laundry.

he stood over you as you collected yourself, darting your tongue out to taste the spit he left behind. you propped yourself up on your elbows to get a look at the man casting a shadow over you. without the sounds of pleasure exclaiming in each others mouths, your ears absorbed the comforting sound of the battering rain. a tree branch smacked the window as thunder rumbled outside.

logan took a moment to admire your presence. starting at the top, he gazed upon your hair that he associates with vanilla and roses and the times he’d touch himself wondering how it’d feel being wrapped around his hand and pulled.

as he removed his leather jacket, he took his time mentally undressing you. feeling even more pressure build in your clit, you bore your hips down into the mattress, rolling them in circles to stimulate the swollen nub. he beheld your tits, flicking his tongue over his bottom lip at the sight of your hard buds under your very thin, white tank top. he threw his heavy jacket to the side, letting it thud in a ball on the ground.

“you look so beautiful, sweetheart,” he said, deeply enthralled by your scantily clad figure laid out in front of him. unable to stop staring, you could see the bulge in his pants get larger and it ridiculously turned you on. with you making eye contact with the crotch of his jeans, he effortlessly unfastened his belt buckle. the metallic buckle clanked to the floor as his jeans and boxers pooled around his ankles. 

he stroked himself while he looked upon you. it was like you could read his mind, because you began to touch yourself. the twitch of his lips and darkening of his eyes validated your teasing. letting yourself drop back on the bed, you caressed your body for him. one hand occupied by cupping your tit and pinching and twisting your nipple while the other is exploring the wet spot left on your panties. not being able to handle eye-fucking you any longer, he dropped to his knees on the edge of the bed between your legs. logan hooked his arms under your knees, pulling you close which in your intoxicatingly lustful brain you found funny, so you laughed.

logan spread your thighs open so he could fit in between them to leave wet, sloppy kisses all over your skin. he nibbled here and there, earning soft hisses and hums from your parted lips.

kiss kiss nibble hiss mmm kiss hum nibble nibble bite kiss suck

he spent about a minute just doing that, leaving warm welts in his mouths wake. “i need these off of you, princess.” once he had kissed his way up to the elastic of your shorts, he snapped it. you nodded and he did the honor of pulling them down and flinging them across the room like he was opening presents on christmas morning. 

he let out an amused scoff as he ran his trembling hand down his face, caught between ecstatic disbelief at the sight of your black lace panties with little black bows adorning the seams. you mentally thanked your past self for slacking on doing laundry and only having your “special occasion” panties left to wear.

“d’you know how pretty you are,” he said. his eyes traced over every inch of you in excitement like you were artwork he stole from the louvre and made out like a bandit with.

his hand disappeared to slickly stroke himself, his mouth watering in anticipation for your taste. his chest heaves as he takes in the sight of you, studying every curve prettily laid out before him; thinking about every position he wants to see you in and every way he wants to please you. without another groan inducing thought, he lunged forward to press a kiss to your lips, his tongue demanding attention. you drink his breath like liquor becoming completely intoxicated by him. he needed this, he needed you.

“need…to taste…you,” he breathed in between kisses. with this mouth obsessed with yours, his hands caress your tits, his thumbing circles on one of the nubs while he’s pinching and pulling on the other. your head falls back and your neck rolls at the sensation, earning profanities from your pretty, swollen lips. your tit misses the hand that he proceeds to run down and up your thigh to locate the spot in your panties you were playing with a moment before. as he parts from your kiss, he’s hooked two fingers under the elastic, pulling those off swiftly.

you yelp when he pushes your torso down. you stare up at the decorative ceiling as he savors you, kissing and massaging your thick thighs. he’s enjoying playing with you as much as possible before allowing himself any pleasure. he wants your juice to cover his face…his neck…his arm…the bed…the floor too when he gets you to pop like a water balloon.

“logan…please, please,” you beg, pawing at his hair. you lift your head to watch the man between your legs taking in the sight and smell of your pretty, wet pussy. even in the dim light, he could see how much you ached for him. he not so secretly got entertainment from watching you lightly buck your hips up to his face and he would’ve let it continue but your pheromones became overwhelming for him; engulfing his head in it’s enchanting aroma.

like fresh pie on a windowsill, he was drawn into you. logan opened wide to swipe one flat tongued lick up your slit. he had one goal — to knock all sense out of you, to fully engulf you in pleasure. he wants you dumb and begging for him to stay right where he is — at the mansion and also all over you. 

logan audibly sucked and popped your clit in and out of his mouth, teasing the most sensitive bit. he’d suck and pop and then lick up your slick, repeating the act. one of his big hands reached up to cup your tit, pinching and twisting and circling. from his hair to the tit he wasn’t playing with, you clawed at whatever would ground you. being eaten by logan felt like floating above the stratosphere.

your wet soaked his beard and it only made him more horny, his cock dripping and throbbing in his fist. tasting you, inhaling you, winning pretty sounds from you, knowing he’s the one making you buck up and fuck his nose only made his appetite for you insatiable. he let go of himself to push his pointer and middle fingers into your needing pussy. you hissed and cursed. the thrill of him devouring you began to reach its peak. his fingers pumped relentlessly into you, curling them to stimulate your g-spot. moans, curses, the gushing of your wet cunt, his sucking and popping and vibrating moans mixed with the rain and thunder grumbling outside filled the dorm like mozart’s symphony no. 25.

he wanted to kiss you, so he did. with his fingers still coaxing an orgasm out of you, he shared the sweet taste. he got back on the bed with you, sliding his free hand under your back to push you up to further to see the mess you were making on the sheets.

“look at how good you’re taking my fingers,” he groaned, inching closer to your ear so you could hear his dirty language loud and clear. “you can come for me, baby.” he peppered a few kisses to your forehead, removing his hand from behind you so he could press it into your stomach. this only heightened the overwhelming wash of pleasure coursing through you.

“lo…logan, i’m-“

“fuck my fingers, baby. use them…oh that’s it…that’s it…i feel that clenching, c’mon you can do it for me. go big baby, make me happy.” his dirty mouth and sporadic clit circling and pumping in and out of you with his tireless wrist pushed you over the edge. you cowered into his neck, pulling on his white tank top and biting the salty skin below his ear as your pussy obeyed, erupting with your juices. out of breath and fucking dumb already, you could feel the wet soak the sheets under your ass.

logan pulled his fingers out of you, landing a light smack on your pussy before licking you clean off of his digits. you fell back on the bed, your arms above your head as you heaved and saw stars.

“‘m not done with you, princess.” he slid off the bed, still delighted by your taste and engulfed in your aroma.

“fuuuck,” you groaned. the pulsing lightning feeling spread throughout both legs as an effect of your rocking orgasm. logan was wicked with his tongue, a devious magician with his fingers and you were his sole audience member wondering about his tricks for sleight of hand.

he quickly tossed his tank, that had tug marks from your attempt to ground yourself, to the side, his muscles flexing under his skin. as he let your post orgasm, cock-dumb brain fog clear, he spit in his hand to fuck his fist. his saliva mixed with the pre-cum leaking from the head, he groaned and sighed heavily at the feeling of giving his dick some sort of relief. you, needy for another hit of him, propped yourself up on your elbows to watch the most delectable creature pleasure himself.

just the sight of him illuminated by candles and flashes of lightning outside as he gets off to how fucked out and dumb you look was enough to have you open up again and play with yourself. the sensitivity from your swollen nub required a delicate touch but your pussy ached, clenching around nothing. his knitted brows relaxed, eyes darting from your pretty face, to your tits, to your fingers rubbing circles where his mouth resided moments ago back to look longingly into your eyes.

“you’re gonna stay,” you said. your hand reached your mouth, your tongue swiping a lick up your middle and ring fingers, wrapping your lips around them to coat them in your saliva. “tell me you’re going to stay for me,” you elaborated. your wet fingers found your aching center.

“there’s no where else i want to be,” he answered. he paced closer to the bed where you laid, his dick basically making eye contact with you as he stopped a few inches away. “you’re mine, you know that?” he noticed your hand slow, “keep going,” he commanded. logan reached out to cup your face, tilting his head to get a look at you obeying his every request. “your face…your mouth…,” his thumb swiped across your lips as he spoke. “your body…your cunt.” he leaned down to kiss your mouth, leaving a string of spit attached to your lower lip. “your laugh…your heart,” he said kindly, his hand massaging your scalp. moans earned from his praise escaped you. “you’re all mine. is that okay with you, baby?”

you’re so bewitched by his aura and his subtle touches make your heart race so fast that you can’t do anything but try to maintain his torrid eye contact and nod.

“use your words, honey.” his thumb returned to the softness of your parted lips.

“i’m yours, logan,” you said, taking his thumb in and closing your lips around it. “if you’ll stay with me, i’ll be yours forever,” you breathed around his thumb, speaking from a mix of eager lust and the terrifying need for him to not to be an asshole, just once.

“i’m not going anywhere…i promise,” he said matter of factly before leaning back down to hungrily devour your kiss. “i need to…fuck you…now,” he cursed in between swallowing moans. 

“do what you want…i’m yours,” you said just clearly audible over the storm rumbling outside. you two shared eye contact so intense that you noticed his dick twitch from your peripheral. you took his dick in your drooling mouth, reaching up to squeeze the base of him. it twitched from the warmth, pressure and tongue swiping rhythmically around his angry, red tip. you kept yourself enveloped around his length, bobbing your head to hit your gag reflex. the added lubrication drove him crazy, his abs twitching under the toned skin of his abdomen. you moaned around him purely from the enjoyment you got out of having him stretch the corners of your mouth, feeling the sting from it. 

logan reached down with both hands to hold your head steady while he sped up thrusting into your throat. your gags and gasps for air, his praise and the storm filled the room beautifully. 

“fuuuck, baby, keep that throat open for me please,” he begged. his hands left their position to find a new one — one supporting his thrusting hips, the other petting your head. “oh, you look so fuckin’ pretty with my cock down your throat…you’re taking me so good, sweetheart.”

he pulled his dick out of your mouth to smack it on your face, complimenting how gorgeous you look. he kissed and licked the mess off of your mouth.

“mm, baby i need to know how good you feel.” with that, he rounded the bed to lay down. “c’mere, baby.” you turned around, crawling on all fours to obey him. his cock in its usual place to be, in his fist, leaks pre-cum in anticipation for you to smother it with your warm, clenching pussy.

“lay down,” he said.

“damn, yes sir,” you say, jokingly annoyed with all of his demands. you lay down next to him, your knees instinctively parting slightly. he lays on his side, resting his hand on your stomach, rubbing his large hand in flat circles.

“d’you know how long i’ve thought about this moment with you?” he asked, leaning in to kiss and suck the skin in the crook of your neck. you lustfully sighed at the sensation of his hot breath. his hand finds its way between your legs again, tickling and tapping at your slit. “i want you to read me the whole time i’m inside…can you do that?”

“are you—“

“yes i’m sure, i feel so fucking good right now and i haven’t even felt you. i want you to feel that and more,” he explains, pulling your chin in to taste the desperation on you.

before he came just from your kiss and rutting against the sheets, he hovered above you. his lips stayed attached to your chest, kissing lower and lower to suck a tit into his mouth, flicking your nipple with his tongue then biting softly on the nub. his hand disappeared from the side of your head to grab hold of his shaft, flicking his tip against your clit. his head dropped as he watched and listened to your slick coating his cock. he quickly swiped up and down your pussy trying to savor every fold and feeling. his brows furrowed, not being able to resist your warmth, he lined himself up with your hole, using his hand to guide just the tip into it.

“oh…fuck,” he groaned in excitement. he pushed in just a little more which caused you to hiss. his head shot up and eyes scanned your face for any sign of regret or unsureness. “are you okay? d’you want to stop?”

“no, baby,” you giggled, lifting your arms rest around his neck, one hand always finding a way into his dark locks. “just been a while…keep going, i’m okay.”

with your permission, he pushed in a little more. he let out a deep groan at the feeling of you stretching to form perfectly around him. you gasped, pressing a hand into his chest, feeling a similar sting to the one you felt in the corners of your mouth earlier. against his want to start thrusting his whole length into you, his went slow, watching your demeanor for cues to keep going.

“you feel…fuck…like it was made for me,” he said which caused the butterflies in you to flutter their wings even faster. “are you okay?” his chest heaved and his breath fanned your face.

“fuck me…please logan,” you said. your hands reached his hips, pushing them down onto you. without wasting another minute, he did. 

he bent your knee more to press it into your chest as his hips repeatedly slammed down hard, his balls smacking your ass. with one hand giving him better access by positioning your leg higher, the other cupped and squeezed your bouncing tit.

“oh my…fucking god,” you moaned. you had let the walls of your mutation down, allowing yourself to be flooded by not only your pleasure…but the love logan feels for you plus the absolute sheer euphoria that he was experiencing deep inside of your pussy. it coursed through your body like a steam engine leaving the station. it had felt like you had been brought to five earth shattering orgasms before the one that was bound to shake you again soon.

“you know you feel so good, look at that fuckin’ fucked out smile. can you feel it? can you feel how good you make me feel, baby? don’t stop readin’ me, princess. it’s all for you,” he praised for you to hear every word.

“holy shit…mm fuckin’…ahh!” your hands couldn’t help but find their way above your head, subconsciously reaching for the bed post for something to ground you again.

“here, baby, hold onto me.” logan grabbed your wandering wrist with his free hand, slapping your hand on his chest which you pressed into as if you were pushing him away. before your cock drunk mind could register what happened, he had flipped the two of you so you were on top. 

logan looked so fucking pretty under you. you took a second to breathe and take in the view before bending your knees to put yourself in a squatting position on his cock. you placed your hands on his heaving chest for support as you started to bounce your ass on him. ‘oh this is so fun’, the thought making you giggle in elation as you drilled down your hips, rocking them back and forth to feel him stimulate the deepest parts of you. his thumb bored into your clit, drawing circles on it. 

as you kept bouncing your wet pussy on him just how he liked, logan lifted his knees up behind you and pushed you back onto them. he moved his hand away from your clit and picked his head up to watch his dick disappear deep inside you. then, he spit. his saliva landed on your pussy and stomach. he went back to stimulating you, fully realizing how much that turned you on from the tight clench around him and the extra juice running down his ass onto the sheets under you two.

he, still playing with your clit, summoned your face closer to his with the middle and ring fingers on the other hand. once closer, he grabbed your neck to kiss your fiercely. 

“you’re my good girl, huh?”

‘mhmm’ was all you could muster with his hand around your throat and his hips still ramming his cock into your stretched out hole.

“use those words for me, baby. are…mm, fuck…you my good girl?”

“ye…sss, baby i’m your…good…oh my fucking…girl!!”

“open your mouth.” he fucking spit in it. you moaned tasting him again and feeling it on your face. “good…fuckin’ girl,” he complimented, kissing you and then squeezing your cheeks to spit on your tongue again. 

your body started to go limp and your eyes were practically glued together. you could feel the searing hot orgasm burning up inside. you could feel logan in a way that you never thought possible. everything. 

his love, his passion, his longing, his fear, his anxiety, his lust, his heart…everything was yours in this moment. high on his feelings, you let your head fall back coming undone on top of him.

“oh you’re so pretty…that’s pretty, baby, keep…fuck…use me, it’s all for you.” his words took you further and further into ecstasy. it was a really good fucking trip that you never wanted to end. the pain of his cock fucking you out and his grip clutching your skin like he’d fall off earth without doing so made you moan so intensely that not even the thunder outside could compete.

he could tell you were a few fucks away from collapsing but so was he. 

“baby…you keep clenching around me like that…i’m gonna fuckin’ fill you,” he said. you kept bouncing on it, wanting him to even feel a fraction of how he just made you feel. he closed his eyes trying to last as long as possible in the heaven that he found in you. his thumbs bore into your hips as he used them to ground himself.

“i want it, baby…fill your good girl up.” you leaned down to speak into his ear and then carry on kissing his neck, letting him claim your moans as trophies. 

“fuuuuck…fuuuck,” he moaned as his thrusting became sloppy and you weren’t bouncing as much anymore. his abs twitched again along with his face. 

SNIKT!!

you hissed at the cool metal of his claws against your skin and the feel of him throbbing severely inside you as he let himself paint your walls. you thanked him in pleased moans before falling on his chest. still semi-hard inside, he kissed the top of your head to which you looked up and he gave you a proper kiss. he let himself twitch out a few more dribbles of cum inside you before pulling his claws back in to carefully rub your back.

a few beats of silence went by as you listened to each others hastened breaths and the rain tapping the glass. 

“…i love you, logan.”

“i think you know how much i love you, baby,” he said, smugly remembering how you looked coming on his dick, further escalated by his letting you read him.

you two snuggled naked under the covers and as you laid on his chest and listened to his light snoring, you read him again. 

ease and silence…and love.

[cherubunie]

SIZE ~ (true form) sukuna x reader ౨ৎ .⋆。⊹ 18+

thinking about kuna with a size kink....... is not good for my mental health omg. sukuna has been stalking you for what seem like years. Watching you when you walk to class, going out with your friends, heading to work,,, and who you fuck yourself late at night. You've always had a feeling as if you were being watched for the last couple years. An unknown darkness that follows you around. It should have scared you away,,,, but you couldn't help but give into your sinful desires... especially on the night that this darkness comes to pay you a little visit.

word count: 7600 sukuna x reader smut. size kink,,, obviously. dumbification, fingering, slapping, overstimulation, heavy smut, corruption kink, stalking, voyeurism, breeding, monster fucking, heavy CNC. Double penetration. Perv! Monster! Stalker! Sukuna x Innocent! reader (I have a problem). True form sukuna smut (yes, we get a double dicker sandwich).

Sukuna always knew that he had a size kink, he just never acknowledged the fact until he met you. You were so small compared to him, it was like you were just a measly doll, a puppet. So pretty, so small, and so, so very innocent. He almost felt guilty for the things he fantasizes about doing to you. almost.

He additionally almost felt a little guilty for how many times he'd watched you masturbate through your window late into the night. The sounds you make while touching your pretty pussy were the only thing that calmed him after a long and stressful evening. He had been doing this for a while. Watching you, that is. He liked watching you get dressed for the day, guessing what makeup style you were planning on doing, the little pop you did with your lips right after you applied your lip gloss. It should be disgusting how many times he's rubbed one out to the sight of you popping those pretty pink, full glossy lips. but he didn't care nor did he feel a tinge of disgust towards himself.

He enjoyed all the times he's watched you walk to and from your little cafe job down the street. How your routine consisted of grabbing a coffee at a different spot despite being able to make yourself a free one at your place of work. How you would play with and feed your cats before heading out for the day.

He also enjoyed the days where you went out with your friends to the mall to shop, or to a restaurant for girls night. He especially liked it when you and your girls went out for dinner. All the cute and godawful tiny dresses you found yourself wearing always just about make him lose his cool. The only thing he hated about girls night out was the fact that you knew you were sexy, meaning men swarmed around you like vultures, eyeing you like a piece of meat. It made him want to bend you over the nearest table and fuck you right in front of everyone.

Sukuna owned you, he just hasn't put the collar on you yet.

Tonight was one of those nights where you went out with your girlfriends. Your hair was done up all pretty and your makeup took you hours to perfect, but it was all worth it for the evil, thigh clasping presence you felt in the dark corner of the club you were in. Your glossy lips were a tint of pink and your cheeks matched the deep red of the short dress you were wearing. The familiar dark energy seemed to be radiating all around you, more than normal.

He knew you couldn't see him, but sukuna stood at that corner of the room, hidden away from all the humans, his eyes locked onto one. Sweat glistened on the top of your breasts, and your lips seemed more plump than normal. But the thing that was driving him crazy was the fact that one man couldn't seem to leave you alone. he kept coming up to you in desprate search of starting a conversation, shamelessly eyeballing your prominent curves and licking his lips. sukuna wanted to explode his head right then and there for trying to seduce his woman. And what pissed him off even more was the fact that you were actually playing into it.

You kept making small touches to the mans arm whenever he said something "funny" and you bit your lip whenever he complimented you. But sukuna knew that your laugh wasn't genuine and your smile was a fake. He knew the real you. Of course he did. He'd been stalking you for months, if not years. he made his claim a while ago, and he wasn't gonna let some scrawny low life steal his property with a couple sad jokes.

Your smile faltered just a hair when you felt the dark presence leave the club. It was almost like a warm blanket had been ripped off of you. Your eyes seemed to glaze over, which led the random man to ask if you were okay.

"Yeah, I'm fine, I just feel sick for some reason" your response was an obvious lie, but apparently good enough for the man to believe.

"oh, are you alright, would you like a ride back to yours?" He asks, and to be completely honest, kinda made you cringe. Of course you didn't want a ride because the only reason you were talking to him was to make whatever was watching you jealous.

Sukuna found interest in you because of your innocence. But oh was he in for a surprise. You knew something had been following you, you knew it had been watching you whenever you touched yourself late at night. You've felt it since the very beginning.

its like you had your own curse.

You should have told somebody when the red flags started popping up out of nowhere; they started out small, ranging from your couch pillows being moved around, then progressed into things like your favorite pair of panties going missing, then to things that freaked you out, like waking up to your bedroom window being open in the morning even though you know for a fact that you had closed and locked it. You should have moved apartments. You should have done something when this started happening.

But you didn't. And it made you sick. Getting off on the fact that you knew you were being stalked by whatever was hunting you.

And the fact that you were upset that the mysterious darkness had left proves just how disgusting you actually are.

"guys, I think im gonna call a cab, I just got hit with a wave of sickness and I really just wanna go home and sleep" you told your friends after shooing off the man you had no interest in.

"omg girl are you okay? of course go home and rest im so sorry!" one of your friends said right after taking her 4th shot.

"yeah im fine, just not really feeling it"

"text me when you get home!"

Staring at the dark yet lively city lights flashing by you, you kept thinking about the little stalker you seem to have. You thought it was weird how turned on you got just from an energy, from a presence. You've never felt so.. needed. so, praised ?

No man, or woman. Has ever given you so much confidence, if that's the right word. And because of that, you've never felt another human beings intimate touch. You only want its touch. Whatever it is.

Sukuna knows what he does to you. He could basically see it radiating off of you. How much confidence you gained and how well you hold yourself. And he'd never been happier to be the one gifting you that grace. That's actually the main thing that peaked his interest about you. The way you held yourself throughout life. Nothing could stop you from getting what you want, and he admired that. It made him question himself at first, being so interested about a human being. It made him debate on keeping you alive. How dare a human make him question himself.

But that passed quickly the first time he'd seen your fingers fuck your pussy. it was delicious. he had to restrain himself from shattering your balcony door and fucking you stupid.

You felt it leaking through the cracks of your front door. It felt different than all the other times its followed you around and watched you throughout your life. It was stronger, and it turned you on so, so much more than normal.

You stood outside your apartment door debating on going inside. Your face was burning and your pussy was throbbing.

It felt like you were going absolutely insane, and it pissed you off not knowing what was making you into such a pathetic mess. With a deep breath, you opened your door only to be met with darkness aside from a few street lights illuminating your living room in a dull yellow.

You set your stuff on the couch before walking into your room, slinging your door open, you didn't even have to turn the light on to know that whatever it was, had decided to perch itself in your bed.

For the first time in years, you actually felt scared of whatever it was. Your whole demeanor changed in an instant, and it made sukuna chuckle.

That chuckle vibrated throughout your skull, straight down your core.

Wanting to fold in on yourself out of fear, but too turned on to do so; you walked in, closing the door behind you. Sukuna's eyes never leaving your much smaller frame.

Trying to hide the fact that almost your entire being is screaming at you to run away from the thing in front of you, you stand your ground.

"What are you?" You ask the figure you have yet to fully lay eyes on. All you're able to make out is a monster-like figure with four arms, two behind its head using them as a cushion against your headboard, and the other two resting on its thighs. Its legs are long and big, both of them spread apart, inviting you in, in the most almost taunting way imaginable. Its face is completely hidden in the dark, restricting you from seeing the cocky, shit eating grin plastered on its face.

"What a weird first question to ask, y/n."

Its voice sent chills down your spine, creating an even stronger pulse in your heart, and your clit. You involuntarily suck in a breath at the sound of its voice. Deep, husky and masculine. It's nothing like you've ever heard before, and it makes your skin crawl in excitement and fear.

He chuckles again at the gasp you let out. You stay in your spot, making sure to keep a safe distance away from him.

"Answer my question." The words left your throat as more of a command than anything else. Your eyes never leave his frame, even as he removes his arms behind his head and lean forward, crossing them across his chest. His eyes never leave your body either, drinking in the sight of your skimpy dress.

All he wants to do is burn it off of you and make you scream his name as you cream all over his cock, but that'll take a minute to happen, so he answers you instead.

"King of curses, my dear." His voice sending another wave of shivers coursing through your body. He stands, and your entire body starts screaming at you to run away. but despite that, you hold your ground, challenging the being in front of you.

He's at least over 7 feet tall, one set of arms still crossed over his chest, the other finds their way to rest on his hips.

"The name is Sukuna." You just about drop to your knees. not only is his voice is unbearable, but you've heard about him before. You never believed in ghosts, curses, spiritual beings, anything of the sort and you've never believed any of your friends or family members when they told you legends about the man standing before you, yet here you are. About to be torn apart by the king they've warned you about for so many years.

"Guess you've heard about me, hm?" You can't get your damn mouth to move or your throat to make any noise. Your eyes are as wide as planets and all you can do is take a shaky step back, mimicking his opposite step forward and towards you.

"Why- why are you here?" voice is shaking as you speak, your breathing is jagged, which is prominent in your stutter. Just as sukuna takes another step forward, his features are illuminated in the moonlight shining through your bedroom windows curtains. He's absolutely breathtaking, and not many people would say that.

I guess I really am fucked up huh

"oh y/n, don't play dumb now, doll." His grin never leaves his face and your eyes meet with his. He's scary in the best way possible, and it's making you want to wipe off that dumb grin by sitting on it.

"You're the one whose..." You take a moment to think, which is extremely hard when this monster starts stalking towards you ever so slowly, both sets of arms coming down to dangle by his sides. He tilts his head to the side and begins to hunch his back and bend over to get a closer look at you. The distance is closing in on the two of you, making you unintentionally walk backwards and into a wall.

The sudden feeling of the cold wall on your back makes you yelp in surprise, but you never look away. He hums at you, signaling you to finish your sentence.

"You're the one whose been watching me for so long.." You say under your breath. Chewing the skin on the bottom of your lip. Your hands clench into fists as he keeps getting closer and closer.

"don't act like you didn't enjoy my little haunting game, love. you do remember touching yourself just to the thought of me, right y/n?" His smug smile could be heard just by the tone of his voice. Your breathing deepens and he's stopped right in front of you, face to face with the thing that's been taking over your entire life for the past couple years. Your back would be disappearing into the wall if it weren't made out of sheetrock. He stands up fully and all you can do is stare straight ahead, looking directly in the center of his entire body. He's fucking huge. Letting out a shriveled breath, you close your eyes.

"Look at me, y/n."

You refuse to open your eyes, or even move in the slightest.

He gives you 15 seconds before one of his hands grips the base of your jaw and forces your face upwards to look at him, nails digging into the flesh of your rosy cheeks.

"I said, look at me." With a fearful yelp at the sudden contact, you force your eyes open and are met with the most sinful red eyes you could ever see in this lifetime.

"Good girl." He snickers at the petrified look that paints your face. Even though you look so scared, your eyes are clouded with so much lust. Sukuna can basically smell the arousal pooling in your panties and it's driving him up the wall. Without a word, he pins you in place, making no room for escape by pressing his one of his forearms against the wall above your head, another one finds its way trailing up your thigh.

You let out a desprate sigh at the contact of his fingers. He traces up the skin of your inner thigh, leaving goosebumps to trail behind until he's met with the flimsy fabric of your underwear and it takes him less than a fraction of a second to feel just how soaked you really are.

"You're disgusting." His voice somehow got an octave deeper, but who are you to complain? You whine at his words, following a louder whine as he starts to trace the slit of your pussy through your underwear. Sukuna's hand locks your head in place as you look up into his eyes as he pushes your underwear to the side and pinches your clit, his fingernails creating a painfully pleasurable feeling.

With a loud yelp, your hips buck forward. With his final free arm, he uses his hand to push your hips back against the wall, keeping you in one place.

"Stay still." He commands. His hand on your hip is locking you in place, so you have no option than to obey. His finger traces patterns on your clit and moans dance off your tongue as a result. His fingers pick up the pace and are now harshly massaging at your center.

"a-ah, slow ple-" Without stopping his brutal pace, sukuna lets go of your face and just before it can fall forward, he grips a handful of your hair and yanks it backwards roughly. your eyes to lock with his once more. A scream at the sudden pain erupts from the back of your throat.

"Don't tell me what to do, i'll use you how I please." Sukuna pulls his fingers away from your clit only to land a harsh slap on the bundle of nerves, making you yelp loudly and your body jolt in surprise. He slaps it a couple more times before forcing two of his fingers into your wet pussy.

Sukuna's fingers slide in with ease thanks to his assult on your clit. He was standing at such a close proximity to your body that when your back archesoff the wall, your stomach and chest meet his front. Just as your body meets his, he decides to let go of your hair, making your head fall forward and onto his center. Your hands instinctually reach up and wrap around his body, using him as leverage to keep yourself from falling. Your nails dig into his back as his fingers work wonders deep inside of you, all you can do is bury your head into him to suppress your noises.

His fingers pump in and out of your pussy, curling and twisting at all the right angles, fingering your core as if he's trying to tear you apart from the inside out. Wet sounds come from just below you, but neither of you seem to hear them because they're drowned out by your loud moans and whimpers of pleasure. Sukuna's eyes never leave your body as you come undone.

His now free hand that was once in your hair decides to hook under your thigh, picking it up and letting it dangle, helping get a better angle to fuck you with his fingers. Because of this newfound angle, your back and head hit the wall behind you once more, but your arms don't leave his body.

"Look at you, such a pretty girl. So fuckin' small I could break you so, so easily." Your nails scratch at his back like there is no tomorrow and all you can do as a response is whimper.

"su- kuna" Your hiccuped plea of his name is enough to know you're about to cum all over his fingers, but he wont let that happen just yet.

"say it, y/n" Sukuna says, his voice solid. You look up, tears welled in your eyes as you look into his and your voice breaks.

"Please can I cum, please k-una please please please" Your cheeks are a deep shade of red and your mouth is slightly ajar and oh does sukuna wanna fill up your pretty mouth and ruin that pretty pink lipgloss that stain your full lips.

Without another word, his smirk deepens and his chuckle vibrates inside your skull. He takes his fingers out of you, your juices now running down your thighs and you're pretty sure your panties are completely ruined thanks to the demon above you. Your eyes widen while you plea him to continue with a hushed whimper.

"Hush, little one" is all he says before one set of arms is gripping your thighs and hauling you into the air. Your legs wrap around his torso on instinct and your throat lets out a surprised squeal at his actions. Your hands come up and one of them grips his shoulder, the other rests in his hair. You're now face to face with sukuna and his eyes look deeply into yours. one of his other free hand's is tangled in your hair within a fraction of a second and is pulling you in to kiss him with so much force, it almost gives you whiplash.

Your tongue tangles with his and you let out another squeal of surprise right into his mouth when your back hits the cushioning of your bed. Sukuna is now on top of you, his torso flat against your heat. The hand that was once tangled in your hair is now trailing its way to your neck. Sukuna breaks the kiss and you go to lean forward in protest, but his huge hand wrapped around your neck stops you. Another hand rests on the headboard above you, and the two that were holding you up now rest at the top of your dress.

With brute force and in the blink of an eye, your once beautiful red dress and strapless braw are now being ripped off of you, tiny flames ignite from the freshly ripped seam for a just a fraction of a second. You gasp at the sudden action and Sukuna's glowing red eyes never falter to look at the reaction on your face. He laughs once more at just how jumpy you are. the cold air hits your skin, causing your nipples to grow hard and goosebumps form on your smooth skin. Sukuna grabs the dress and bra out from under you and throw the articles of clothing across the room to be forgotten, all while looking right at you. Once the dress is out of sight, you look up at him, your eyes half lidded with lust that are basically begging him to use you.

Sukuna smiles at how innocent, yet already fucked out you look and decides to lean down toward your breasts, taking one of your nipples and fondiling it inside of his warm mouth. His tongue laps at you and your hands fly to his hair, pulling it out of pleasure. His two free hands now rest at your thighs, slowly pulling them apart, to which you happily obliged. His mouth moves from your nipple and starts to suck at the skin of your breasts. His mouth trails from your chest, down to your stomach and abdomen, leaving deep purple marks and bites that will most likely be staying for days, if not weeks. Your whimpers are like music to Sukuna's ears which only make him want to make you scream his name.

The hand that rested on the headboard is now grabbing your hands from his hair and forcing them down onto the mattress above you and the set of hands that were on your thighs are on your hips. Your eyes dont leave his, even as he rips your panties and throws them in the same direction he did your other clothes, making you bare yourself completely to him.

His hands part your thighs once more and pins them down, holding you in place.

"So cute, so tiny. 'could just ruin you hm?" he speaks as he lowers his head down to your heat, his breath fanning your dripping pussy. Your breathing is even more uneven than before as it's mixed with your hushed moans. Without taking his eyes off yours, he sticks out his tongue and licks a stripe up your cunt, causing your jaw to slack open in the perfect "oh" shape as your whine rings inside sukuna's skull. He licks up your cunt a couple more times before it initially lands on your clit, then he buries his head into your thighs and nips at you like a dog in heat.

His mouth sucks, bites and laps at your clit, and you try with all your strength to buck your hips up, but to no avail, the hands on your thighs pin you in place as your arms are basically unuseful. All you can do is throw your head back in pleasure as this creature devoures you. His grip on your throat tightens a little more and suddenly it's more difficult to breathe, but you dont even care.

Sukuna's saliva mixes in with your fluids that run down your thighs and asscheeks, wetting the bed under you. His long tongue fucks itself inside your pussy and against your walls as his teeth drag across your clit. Sukuna doesn't look away from you, not for a second. He wants to see every twist on your face and flex of your abs as he eats you out, he's desperately and intensively observing you, as if you were the most beautiful, treasurable piece of art he's ever layed eyes on. His tongue is rough as he creates a rhythm of fucking your insides, and sucking your bundle of nerves.

Your arms tug at the restraint of his hands holding your wrists. He's so much stronger than you, yet that fact alone turns you on so much more. Your moans and hushed screams fill the room as small beads of sweat gather on your hairline. Your body twitches under sukuna's control and your clit is throbbing for release as he toys with you.

You're so close to finishing and sukuna can tell so easily. Your moans grow into louder screams and your back arches off the bed. His grip on your throat tightens, cutting off all supply of air and your eyes are thrown open as you choke and cough, trying to get any oxygen possible.

Sukuna laughs into your pussy, which vibrates through your whole body. Your eyes look down into his, desperately trying to tell him to let you cum, or breathe. Whichever one he will let you do. Your silent plea only turns him on even more and your vision is starting to blacken and your head begins to feel light.

"Fuck, you're so adorable when you're beggin' for your life" He says as he sits up and hovers over you, refusing to let you finish. The hand on your throat disappears and you cough and gasp for air, but just as you suck in a deep breath, its knocked out of you by a harsh slap to your face and all you can do is gasp in pain at the sudden stinging on your cheek. He grips your face directly after with the hand he had previously slapped you with and forces you to look down at your pussy.

One of the hands on your thighs moves up to your cunt and plunges inside you. Two of Sukuna's fingers thrust inside your cunt at lightning speed and curl up into your center, hitting that spot you need him most. You choke out a scream and your hips grind into his palm.

"Look at the mess you're making y/n. Such a nasty little girl you are." He says as he looks at your pretty face contorting from the overstimulation he brings upon you.

Sukuna's fingers are relentless as they move fast inside of you. Not even a couple seconds later, you're cumming all over his hand and arm, squirting your fluids all over him as well as your bed sheets. You come undone with a scream.

"K-kuna oh my god!" You're being so loud, you could almost bet the neighbors across the street could hear. Neither of you cared though, all you cared about was how you were about to be torn in half.

Your eyes are watery again and you're still desperately trying to gather air in your lungs. Sukuna's hands let go of your wrists and face, but right after, you hear an article of clothing rip. You sit up slightly in wonder, but your mouth instantly hangs open at the sight of two handsomely large cocks sprung up, hitting just above Sukuna's belly button. Your mouth instantly dried at the sight.

Speaking of sights, Sukuna thought you were a beautiful one. Your hair was a shriveled mess and your face was the most gorgeous shade of red. You looked so fucked out, yet so ready to take anything he gives you like the obedient whore you are. You had a look of fear and interest plastered on your face. Sukuna was never one for love or anything of the sort, but the moment he layed his eyes on you those couple years ago, he knew he was fucked. You were just so different than most of the humans he had ever made contact with. You didn't care about the difference between "good and bad" and you always took what you wanted without second thought, even if it took you a while to grasp. You were always ready for whatever was thrown at you and were always in control of everything around you.

That's why he decided to stick around. Since the beginning, he's wanted to corrupt your world and fuck up your flow of control. He was arrogant and cocky. You just needed someone, or something, to step in and take control over you. And sukuna was never going to let anybody else besides him take control over his woman.

Though he would never admit it out loud, you were breathtaking. You're also the only reason he hasn't burned this world to the ground,,,, completely.

"Think you can take em'?" Sukuna's voice never fails to make a shiver run up your spine. You don't answer him, all you do is stare into his eyes, a silent plea to just have him use you however he pleases. He takes your lack of an answer and laughs quietly under his breath. He brings one of his hands to his face, and smiles into his palm.

"you're gonna be the death of me."

His body slowly stalks towards you, crawling onto the bed, trapping your body between his and the headboard. Your thighs rub together in desprate search of friction. You can't take it any longer, you need him inside you. You need every part of this being in any way you can have him.

"I don't care if you think you can take my cocks' or not, I'll force you to take em' how bout that, yeah?" His head tilts as he speaks and one of his hands grips your leg and pulls your body down farther onto the bed, causing you to lay down underneath his much larger body.

"You're so- so big kuna.." Your voice is uncontrolled and small. Unlike earlier where your screams and moans were ear piercing and just so delicious. Your eyes look up into his, your hands sneak up to wrap around one set of his arms, squeezing his biceps as you chew on the skin of the inside of your cheek.

Sukuna groans at your words. He really was huge, trapping your body underneath his. One of his hands grips the headboard, another comes down to grip the side of your face. His thumb traces your bottom lip, smearing your lipgloss.

Just as you open your mouth, his thumb presses down on your tongue as you suck in his finger. One of your hands makes its way down his body, gripping one of his huge cocks in your small hand. Despite the size difference, Sukuna still hisses in response. You pump his hard dick a couple times, looking directly into his eyes as you suck on his thumb. With painful force, sukuna grips your wrists and suddenly, both your hands above your head once more.

With one hand gripping the headboard, one holding your wrists in place, another moves from your mouth to grip one of his dicks while the final hand holds himself up, hovering right above you. You whine at the lack of control you have, grinding your hips upwards as a sign to let you go, but all sukuna does is laugh at your attempts of escape.

"Stop moving, slut." He pushes one of his dicks at your pussys entrance, but you don't listen to him, you grind your hips upwards once more and Sukuna doesn't seem to like that very much.

"Told you to stop movin' brat" and without warning, or any lube (as if you needed any) he pushes one of his cocks into your pussy with full force. It has you automatically screaming at the stretch. It's painful and you're pretty sure you're bleeding.

Sukuna bottoms out inside of you and stills, the outline of his dick prominant through your stomach, it drives him insane.

Sukuna uses his now free hand and pushes down on the outline of his cock through your tummy and chuckles.

"Fuck you're so small y/n, look at your tummy baby" You obey him and look down, seeing the outline of his huge dick bulging in your abdomen. A scared moan leaves your lips as you take in the sight. It literally looks like he could split you in half at any given moment. Sukuna pulls his dick out, a painful sensation radiates through your vagina as he does. The bulge in your tummy disappears and sukuna's face falters into one of disappointment.

"fuck, you're bleedin' y/n! " sukuna says to you, and just as you're about to look for yourself, he thrusts his dick back inside you, filling you back up again. He bottoms out inside you and a strangled moan that sounds more like a cough forces its way out of your throat.

"full- im so full, too full please-" Sukuna's face turns into one of disappointment again at your words as he says

"that's too bad, I wasn't even close to being finished with stuffin' you doll." He mocks you, and just as he finishes talking, you feel his second cock at the entrance of your ass, which causes you to shoot your head up.

"No, no please dont" you beg him, despite your words not being how you really feel, you beg him not to anyways. sukuna's face is still one that mocks you, pretending as if he feels bad for splitting you open. He pushes his tip into your ass so slowly it almost makes this situation better. The stretch is unbearable, especially with how tight you are with another cock spreading you open and filling you already.

Sukuna's entire tip is stuffed inside, waiting for you to adjust to his length.

"Look at you, taking me so well. Such a good little girl aren't you?" His voice is taunting you. Your arms feel weak from how much you've been struggling to break free, so all you can do I lay there and adjust to his cocks with hushed moans.

Sukuna starts moving his cock deeper inside you slowly, but not slow enough.

"Kuna please no, it's too much I can't take it" Your head shakes from side to side as painful tears fall from your eyes and down your cheeks. Sukuna pouts at this and leans down and uses his tongue to lick the tears away.

"you can take it, you're already doing such a good job for me." This reassurance helps you a little more, and with every inch growing deeper inside you, you find it hard to breathe, and sukuna notices.

He leans down and whispers deeply into your ear

"breathe my dear."

you listen to him and take deep breaths. In one particular deep breath, sukuna takes it upon himself to completely push the other half of his cock into you, getting it done in one swift motion just as you breathe out.

His actions cause you to scream in pain,,, and in pleasure. More tears fall from your eyes. Sukuna doesn't even give you time to adjust this go around, he just can't wait any longer.

"fuck, takin' my cocks' so well, you're so fuckin' tight, couldn't help myself" Sukuna says into your ear.

Your ass feels so tight as he thrusts in and out of both your stretched holes. the pain subsides into pleasure after a couple strokes and your painful hisses turn into sickening moans.

The sound of skin slapping echos off the walls of your dark room, the only light source being the moonlight shining through your window. Your pussy feels like it's going to burst every time sukuna's dicks thrust back inside you.

Sukuna's grip on your bed frame is so tight, the wood crumbles in his hand

"fuck" He curses under his breath

He needs to grip onto something, anything, so he decided to harshly grip the sheets that lay right next to your head. He looks from your face, down to your pussy where he sees his cocks move in and out of you, stretching you so beautifully.

When he looks back up at you, your teary, half lidded eyes lock onto his. You dont break eye contact, even as you moan out his name like a chant that dances off your tongue straight into his ears. And he loves it.

Your walls squeeze his dick's like you're trying to milk him dry. He's even surprised both of them fit inside you.... as if he didn't literally force them to fit.

"Please please let me touch you, just wan' touch please kuna' please" you moan out, begging him to let go of your arms. Much to his objection, he lets you go.

Your arms instantly wrap around his back, nails digging into his skin as you pull your bodies closer together. Your boobs press up against his broad chest as your sweat rubs into his skin.

Two of his arms hold his body up on his forearms above your head now, the other is pinning your stomach to the bed, the feeling of his dick entering and exiting your pussy being felt through your tummy.

his last free hand finds its way to the small of your back, his arm wrapping around your body and pressing you somehow closer against his. Your face is directly into his chest as you moan and scream out his name as his thrusts become wicked and fast, his hips snapping against yours. Your legs spread out for him to take advantage of you.

Sukuna looks down at you buried into his chest, his body hot and sweaty. Your nails scratching daggers into his back, you're pretty sure you can feel blood under your fingernails.

With each thrust inside you, your moans are choked and jagged and it's hard to breathe. The coil in your tummy is about to burst and you feel like you could explode from just how full you really were. Everything was too much, yet so perfect. Sukuna felt as if he was going to burst too, everything was so hot and wet, it was only driving him even more insane.

Your screams grew louder with each stroke of his cocks, signaling to sukuna that you were close.

"want me to come inside you? full you up and breed you like a dumb fuckin whore, turn you into a mommy?" He asks you, and all you can do is shake your head.

"you're gonna take my cum weather you want to or not, understand? Fill you up so nice nd' warm" He bares his teeth as you scream his name..

"no, no please dont I can't handle it, too full please k-una!" He doesn't like this answer, and it causes him to groan through his teeth. With a set of his arms, he grips your waist harshly, and with the other, he's stabilizing himself on the bed above you and sits up slightly.

"I dont care what you want, you're gonna take whatever I give you." he says before pulling his cocks out and flipping you onto your tummy. Your yelp of surprise is cut short as your hands grip at the sheets above you, trying to pull your body up and away from the monster.

"ah ah ah, dont run away from me, im nowhere close to being done with you." Sukuna stands up at the edge of the bed, his feet on the floor. He grabs your ankles and pulls you to the edge where he stands. He lets go of your ankles and roughly grips your hips, pulling you up and slightly into the air. He forces your knees down into the mattress, your ass up and your face in your sheets. His hands remain on your hips as another one of his hands finds a handful of your hair, gripping and pulling your head upwards and next to his chest, forcing you into a painful arch.

Sukuna bends over so his face is next to your ear. His long tongue licks your neck, and up to the lobe of your ear just before he bites it, your moan in exchange.

"now shut up and let me ruin you" is all he says before forcing your face down into your sheets, one of his hands pressing your head down into the mattress.

Sukuna thrusts his cocks into your holes once more, resulting in a muffled scream coming out of your mouth, but he doesn't move. his hips flush against your ass. Sukuna lifts one hand from your hips and lands a harsh smack on your ass, leaving your skin red. Your walls tighten around his cocks.

so he does it again

and again

and again

over and over and over until you're creaming all over his cock and squirting all over your bed once more with more muffled screams.

"pathetic. squirting all over my cock with just a few slaps to your ass. how disgusting could you possibly get?" He mocks you again, landing one more painful slap to your ass as your liquids drip down your thighs and onto the mattress below you. He grabs the flesh of your ass with both of his hands and slowly pulls his dicks out of you, the empty felling in your tummy has you begging for him to fill you back up.

sukuna's face twists into one of interest as he hears your whines of protest.

"oh? what a little slut I have on my hands. and here I thought you truly didn't want me to tear you apart" he says as he thrusts his cocks deep back inside you, hitting your sweet spot that has you squealing ever so loudly. Your hands above your head painfully grip the sheets, your nails digging into your palms drawing blood. His thrusts are endless and with each one, he grows deeper inside of you. He uses one of his hands and rakes his nails down your back, scratching at your skin. It was a painfully blissful feeling that had your walls squeezing his cocks so tight, it causes sukuna to curse under his breath.

With a chuckle, he says

"you're so fukin' tight, im gonna fill you up so full, so swollen with my baby, you'll forever be marked as mine, you'd like that huh?" of course sukuna was lying, he would never ever want to reproduce, but the way you're milking his cocks is making him reconsider his entire opinion on that subject.

His thrusts grow faster and stronger, your pussy and ass flutter around his dicks so prettily, he can see it whenever he looks at your holes. You moan his name over and over again, like it's the only thing you know how to say.

The knot in your abdomen kept getting tighter and tighter every time he hit your sweet spot, you were so close to finishing and all you could do is yearn for sukuna to carry you to the finish line. So that's exactly what he did.

The hand holding your head down into the mattress disappeared, so you turned your head to the side, resting your cheek against the mattress, your eyes find his and oh fuck

oh good god

sukuna lost it

he threw his head back with a loud moan and tightened his grip on your hips so intensely he felt your skin break from under him, his nails digging into your flesh as blood ran down your legs, pooling on the sheets, staining his fingertips.

You had a puddle of drool where your face lays. your lips were bleeding from biting down on them so roughly, and your eyes. oh fuck your eyes were so perfect. it was as if sukuna could read a whole book just by looking into your eyes.

Just as he was about to finish, you came all over him once more, wetting the bed, soaking it really. Your walls fluttered all around him like the butterflies in your stomach. as you came, sukuna shot warm ropes of cum straight into your ass and tummy, so full it was leaking out of both your holes. but it wasn't enough.

It wasn't enough for sukuna.

In the middle of both your orgasms, he resumed his thrusts, but your body gave out and you collapsed on the mattress, your stomach hitting the wet bedding.

your body couldn't move, you became putty in his hands and you had no complaints.

sukuna cursed as he crawled over you, his dicks never leaving your walls. one of his arms snaked its way under your arm to grip your throat, another one held your tummy, another spread your legs enough for him to continue fucking you, and the last one held him up.

His hips met your asscheeks in a monsteristic rhythm, a burning sensation beginning to form on your flesh. your eyes rolled into the back of your head as your jaw layed slack open, drool running down your chin.

he was fucking his cum into you, making your soul intertwine with his in more ways than one. He fucked you through your next and final orgasm, your legs shook involuntarily as your guys' mixed cum got everywhere. it dripped down sukuna's cock, onto the mattress, between your thighs, onto his abdomen, all over your asscheeks, it was everywhere.

Your eyes closed, even as his thrusts continued, your mind faded away from your body and before you fully lost consciousness, you could hear sukuna's words ring through your ears.

"Ill see you soon, y/n."

[inbabylontheywept]

she was dead silent on the drive home, but that was okay. sometimes, after band practice, she was just out of words. it was a short drive to her house. the only part where it actually felt weird was after i pulled up her parent’s driveway. 

after that, the silence stretched so far it smeared and left a weird residue. she kept looking at the car door like she wanted to leave, so i looked at the door too, then she looked at me, and i looked at her, and my first thought was that she was going to tell me that the door was stuck. i was used to that car always doing some damn thing. it was the car me and all my siblings had learned to drive in, and it was really beat to hell. there were dents all over the body, which we’d unsuccessfully tried fixing up with spackle. it had looked nice for maybe a week, but then the sun wrecked it - the spackle cracked up like the mud on the bottom of a dry riverbed and turned a sort of off yellow-white that made the car looked like it had been molded out of chicken shit. it also had a bullet hole it through the cabin that whistled like a toothless old man whenever the car went above 40, so loud it could drown out the radio, and a cabin that smelled so strongly of bugspray that even the arizona summer we drove everywhere we could with the windows down.

(if you have kids one day, you will maybe, possibly, begin to understand how much i loved that car.)

anyway, i was thinking about what else could possibly be wrong with the chickenshitmobile, and she just kept looking at me, and then i wondered if there was something on my face, and she just kept looking at me, and then the penny dropped and i realized she was trying to work up the nerve to break up with me. 

now, i’d seen her work up the nerve to do things like this before – it could take quite a while. and knowing it was about to happen made the waiting immediately unbearable. 

so i said hey. 

and she looked at me, very startled, and said hey back real small. like she’d been caught. and in a way, i suppose she had. 

and i said it’s okay. you can just say it. i’ll be okay.

i’m always okay. 

and she said: i’m really sorry. 

i loved her, you know? it was highschool, but teenagers are capable of love. the way people love changes over time just as much as the way they stand, or the way they talk, but things don’t stop existing just because they're different. opposite really – a thing only stops changing when it's fully gone.

and i said, nothing to be sorry for, and i meant it. she looked a little relived, and i was happy to give her that peace. then she left. i watched her make it through the front door, because that was just habit at that point, and then i sat there a while afterwards, checking how i felt. and the answer was not good, but good enough to make it home. good enough to limp on. 

so i put my car in reverse, took my last look goodbye, and immediately backed into her neighbor’s car. 

crunch. 

air bags didn't go off, which was good. i left a decent dent in the bumper of the other car. genuinely couldn’t tell if i did anything to my car – anything wrong with it just kind of blended together into the general ecosystem of hand mottled, sun cracked, chickenshit spackle. 

i checked my glove box, and my car insurance info was, of course, out of date. my phone was dead too. as a teenager, my phone was less my lifeline to my friends, and more my tether to my parents, so i wasn’t particularly conscious of keeping it charged. both my fault.

i sat there a few minutes, trying to think of the best way to handle things, and there was only one answer i could think of, and i hated that answer, so i spent a few more minutes trying and failing to think of a better one, and then a few more coming to peace with what had to be done. 

then i went back to knock on my now ex’s front door. 

her dad opened, which i was very relieved over, even if he seemed less than thrilled. he looked me over, and in a firm, but slightly apologetic way said: she does not want to see you right now. 

(i think he assumed i was going to try and talk her out of the break up?)

and i said not here for her. i just backed into your neighbor’s car, and i need to call my dad, but my phone’s dead. could i borrow yours?

and he looked at me, then back at his neighbors car, which sure enough was dented, then he looked at the chickenshitmobile, and if there was something wrong with it, it just kind of blended into the general Wrongness of the car, then back to me, and i could see him imagining the last ten minutes from my pov: getting broken up with, backing into a car, having to walk up to your exes door and borrow a phone, calling my dad to tell him that i just reversed into someone.  

and his expression shifted from stern and apologetic to truly sad, which felt more kind that i deserved. things only got here because i kept fucking up - forgot to look behind me, forgot to replace the insurance forms, forgot to charge my phone. it was my mess, but his sympathy meant the world to me. i probably would’ve cried if he said sorry, or patted me on the back or called me sport, but instead he said

stay out here – i’ll bring you a phone.

and then he left.  

i found a nice spot on the lawn in the shade under a sycamore, then settled into his grass.i was trying not to freak out, and was doing an okay job. he came out a minute or so later, not just with a phone, but a juicebox and a jar of green olives, which really threw a wrench in the whole try not to cry thing. soon as i saw those, a few tears squoze out. i was still hoping i could pass them off as Manly Tears but then he told me that he’d gotten the olives a few weeks before and had been meaning to hand them off to me, and that this was his last chance for that. then i made a sound like a horse drowning in a bog, and he patted my back pretty rough, four solid thumps, like he wasn't sure if i was crying or choking on an olive, and was trying to cover both bases at once.

then he went back inside, and i made a few more bog horse noises while finishing off the rest of the entire jar of green olives, and then i called my dad.

he was about ten minutes away that day, and luckily was home. he drove over, and we went to the neighbor’s house, and from there things actually went quite nice. the neighbor was a retired man who actually said he could fix the dent himself, no need for insurance. he said he appreciated that i didn't just drive off, and i said i was really sorry about his car, and he said he was really sorry about my car, and then he gestured to the chickenshitmobile and i laughed because it really was a disaster on wheels.

then we left.

i thought we were going to head straight home, but instead we went to a gas station, and we both got several slim jims that we folded into thick enough coils that we could put them on a hotdog bun because the growing up mormon equivalent of having a sad brewski with your dad is just choosing to make bad decisions sober. then he took me to the canals and we watched the sun turn all orange and pink, and he looked over at me and said:

brains are good at remembering bad days. so you gotta make sure that a bad day has a good part in in, so you can remember that too. remember that when you have a kid. try to do a good job on days like that - they're going to be a big part of how they remember you.

and then he gave me a big hug and said he was never going to eat another slim jim again.

---

the year after that i went to college, which kicked my butt in new and exciting ways. and on a lot of those bad days, after a test that went sour, or a faux paus that was particularly embarrassing, or some other hardship of my new adult life, i’d stop by the gas station and pick up leathery, half jerkied hotdog before heading to the canals to watch the sun set. i’d take a bite and imagine my dad next to me, grimacing through the slim-jim wad, asking what good thing i was going use that time to remember. 

and in my head, i’d say you, dad. 

i’m going to remember you.