#it’s 4 in the morning where am i
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fixhbones · 3 months ago
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i’ve made so many mha doodles in the past couple weeks (most of which will be posted this weekend please bare w me >_<) but here’s some silly stuff from tonight
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biolumien · 7 months ago
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Hey :) I just found your blog and I love your writing style, so I was wondering if you'd write for Windbreaker's Suo or Kaji? If yes, may I request a hurt/comfort (or angst to fluff) where the reader is in love with him (if you write for both, I'll let you choose, who you want to write for), but doesn't know he also likes her, so when she sees a girl flirting with him, she just leaves, wanting not to interrupt, before she can see he's turning the girl down. And he later comes to find her somehow? Idk, just an idea. If you don't feel like writing it, don't stress yourself out. Either way I'm looking forward to your future stories!
notes: tysm for your kind words; i decided to write suo! it’s a lil’ light on the angst and more a cute drabble, or at least it is for my standards… but i hope it’s still good. ik you used she/her in your request but i tend to write gender neutrally? just to be more inclusive overall so i hope that’s okay as well… please enjoy! 🙂‍↕️
a token of your affections
hayato suo x gn!reader no warnings apply. suo's a smooth operator. or something. word count: 1090
there’s no mistaking that suo is the kind of guy who gets flighty with everyone. layers of charm, artificial or not, built up around him to create the aura of someone utterly untouchable. unknowable.
but it was that suave charm of his that made you fall in love with him. he spoke kindly and gently to everyone, of course–but it always seemed like he saved a little bit of it for you. an extra sweet glance, a small smile, all so you could hold it to your chest. you could cradle the perfect jewel of his affection. what color would it be, you wonder.
it was the kind of love that got people to write sappy letters. you thought you might, at some point. but all the same, you were a little afraid of what he might say. would he smile at you the same way, with that same kindness and gentleness, before delivering the hard-hitting truth that he just didn’t feel the same way? what would you do then? what was there to do, if he did that? 
you could always die of a broken heart, you thought to yourself. that was always the other option.
you and suo frequently walked home together—the two of you lived relatively close, so it was no surprise. suo’s gaze was fixed up ahead, humming a soft tune. 
“suo,” you say. 
“mm? you know you can call me hayato, you know. it’s just us. i don’t mind.” suo smiles at you as he always does—quiet and patient. 
“it feels weird,” you protest. “everyone else at school just calls you suo.” 
“mm, that’s true. but i’ve trusted you with my name! it’s a big honor, you know. not everyone get that from me,” suo says, tapping his bottom lip contemplatively. “but what’s on your mind?” 
“mm.” you glance at the road, at a street cat skulking through an alleyway for a moment. “are you interested in anyone right now, suo?”
“oh-ho?” suo’s eyebrows raise, the smile on his face growing wider ever-so-slightly. “hmm… what’s got you interested in that?”
you flush, looking away.
“none—none of your business,” you mutter. 
“but it is my business!” suo crows, leaning close to you. you take a sudden step back in alarm, practically stumbling over yourself as suo catches you with lightning-fast reflexes, cradling your back in his arms. “careful now. wouldn’t want you getting hurt.” 
“…” your face feels like it’s burning. “suo, i wasn’t gonna fall that badly.” 
“just making sure,” suo says, righting you. “but like i said—it is my business, since you’re asking about my personal life.” he smiles, tapping his lower lip again. “but… to answer your question, then—no comment.” 
“what? hey!” you protest, but he laughs, putting his hands behind his head as he walks off. 
you think you get your answer, though. 
as furin’s daily patrols end, you stand at the school gate, waiting for suo to show. you wait for about fifteen minutes—and then you frown. he’s usually more punctual than this—hell, half the time he’s the one waiting for you at the gate. where could he possibly be? 
as you head back into the building to look for him, you hear—
“please go out with me!” 
your eyes widen as you peek into the heavily graffitied classroom. suo’s back was turned to you, so you couldn’t see his face, but the girl was holding out some kind of folded envelope to him, and your face flushes and your eyes feel like they’re burning too. hell, they might as well just set you on fire right now, or maybe see if self-immolation was still a thing. 
“mm…” suo’s voice lilts. you curse the man you love, for a moment—for the fact that his voice sounds sweet no matter what, that it was impossible to tell what he was thinking at any moment. “well—”
there’s roaring in your ears. 
you rush off before you can hear suo’s answer, cursing yourself the entire time.
of course you weren’t the only one that liked him—there was a myriad amount of admirers he could have. of course he wouldn’t choose you first—and your mind flickers back to the affections he gave you, the weight of his gaze and the smiles that you’d wanted to keep for yourself. 
you were so, so stupid, you think bitterly as you rush out of the school, trying desperately to hide tears that were now trickling down your face. the last thing you wanted were rumors that you were crying over suo, in any case.
why would you care if suo was dating someone else that wasn’t you? why did you care that someone confessed to him before you got to? why did you curse yourself so much for not getting there quicker? were you going to lose hi—
“wait.” 
suo’s hand clasps your wrist, and you nearly topple back into him—and then you do, losing your footing and slamming fully into his chest. he exclaims in surprise, but manages to right himself. you look up.
“what, suo? don’t you have a girl who confessed to you already?” you ask weakly.
suo’s eye widens.
“so it was you,” he says softly, a teasing smile on his face. “it’s rude to eavesdrop.”
“rude to—why aren’t you answering my question?” you ask, somehow angry for an absurd reason you can’t even fathom.
“hm? i turned her down,” suo says. “told her i’ve already got someone i’m fully interested in.”
“huh?” you blink up at him. “who—”
suo leans his head down to kiss you, interrupting your words. the kiss is soft, short, and sweet—but bears with it the same kindness, the same precious jewel of love that you wished you might be able to keep.
“it’s you,” he says as he parts from the kiss. “it’s always been you.”
and as you blink up at him, you think the tears start falling. suo laughs fondly.
“i thought i was obvious about it,” suo says. “i let you call me by my first name and everything.”
“you weren’t obvious enough,” you protest.
“hmm. that’s my bad, then,” suo says softly, leaning down to kiss you again—on your forehead, and then on your nose, and then on your lips again, short and sweet. “i’ll make it up to you. go out with me?”
you look up at him.
the jewel of suo’s affection was bright red, you decided. and it was yours, now, sitting in the palm of your hand.
“of course,” you say.
and suo smiles, pulling you close to his chest.
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ceasarslegion · 1 year ago
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No i dont think its a good thing to make hating children your entire personality but can i please just say that i dont like them and dont want to deal with screaming temper tantrums and meltdowns from other peoples kids (especially, ESPECIALLY when the parents are absolutely useless in dealing with them) without 30,000 people crawling out of the woodwork to assume that i think all kids should die
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butchnavi · 16 days ago
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forced myself to wake up and leave my warm cozy blanky at 3:30 am in the winter to speedrun my syllabus because they gave us 12 hours to prep for our endsem are yall proud of me
#not to mention ive baaaaarely gotten sleep the past few nights because its been back 2 back exams every day#forget afternoon naps i havent even been getting more than 4 hours at NIGHT#and i am a bitch that values sleep above all else#and i got no time to prep the syllabus beforehand because of all our never ending fucking assignments#including yk. the full fledged GAME they made us code from scratch in 3 weeks without teaching us anyyy of the required tools or languages#literally speedran an entire math course with everything from number theory and graph theory to fucking induction and combinatorics#in like. 4 hours and gave my endsem NOT EVEN 12 HOURS BACK AND IT WAS 50% OF OUR FUCKING GRADE#and now i have to do it againnn for the third exam in a row at 9:30 in the fucking morning#which btw i realized LAST NIGHT. because our datesheet said the exam was at 2:30 but theyre doing it in batches#so i dont even have the morning to revise and need to pull this shit#AND THEN EVEN FOR THE COURSES WHERE I SOMEHOW COVER THE ENTIRE SYLLABUS THOROUGHLY THEY WILL GIVE THE MOST OUT OF POCKET BULLSHIT#THAT YOUVE NEVER HEARD OF IN YOUR LIFE#and after THIS exam i have to speedrun linear algebra and teach it to a bunch of kids by tomorrow morning#granted that one is on me because i couldve said no but ugh#college hateposting#in other news my ex crush wore a suit yesterday and she looked so hot she almost made me relapse into lesbianism#but i digresssssss#x am rambles#man ive missed ranting about shit on tumblr i should come back here more often
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keeps-ache · 2 months ago
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i think i'm starting to really like writing again :D this will have consequences
#just me hi#oho so my beloved is back from the war huh [<- had locked the doors and windows to keep its 'beloved' out and forgot about it]#that old itch to just start slapping sounds i know on a doc and hoping in 3 days it still makes sense is back lol :3#/can't read the last thing i wrote yet cuz it hasn't been three days </3#rule is i have to spend the same amount of time away from it as i spent working on it. including editing. sad!#it Does help my brain reset though. and forget about literally everything bfhvsjgh#and i know it's possible for me to finish this kinda stuff now so like. Woho !!#the power. the Powerrrr#/also tryna get more comfortable with sharing my writing so i'm starting by sending small finished stuff to like 2 people i trust kfvshg#i can handle unwarranted critiques of my art but i am not at a stage for my writing where it won't cause like international#devastation and that's goofy so Pfvhsh 👍#we're working on it :)#and i think people's reactions are amusing so ehehehghehghgehg :3 a bonus :33#//yea though i'm gonna go put some more obleas in the freezer#obleeeeeeeeaaaa can't wait to seeeee yaaaaaa. on. my. Plaaaaate#btw shoutout to eating a spoonful of cajeta at like 1 in the morning thinking everyone's asleep and then you look up and younger#sibling no. 4 is there staring dead into your eyeballs like. is there anymore#and you go uhhh yea. and then as he's walking around to get some younger sibling no. 3 rises up from seemingly nowhere like I Want Some Too#lmfshvhf#and then you're all just sitting up for about 2 more hours just talking about very dumb things and having cajeta. illegally but still hfbvh#//anyway i'm gonna depart now :) ciao toodles lol :3
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icewindandboringhorror · 2 months ago
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It's always interesting to hear about people's weird/unexpected "alternate life paths". Like, something that you could have done with your life, a job you almost took, a school you almost went to, etc - that was still actually realistic enough that it could have happened, but NOW it seems to not suit your current personality.
Like for example, I currently hate advertising (how manipulative it is, brands trying to be 'relatable', social media amplifying it to an obnoxious extreme, etc.) so much that even seeing a little ad before a youtube video is grating to even witness, but there was a point in time where I was genuinely seriously considering going into marketing/making commercials as a career lol. Or like, I have a relative who was very inclined to be a pastor when they were younger, even though today they're a super strong atheist, etc. etc.
#BECAUSE I knew I really liked filming and editing things and doing set design and costume design (from having done little bits of that#here and there in media classes and my own stuff - i used to be a lot more into making videos than I am now). BUT I was always thinking#that a movie is WAAY to big and long. even a short film. So I was trying to think of ways I could still like#have the fun of scouting locations to film and dressing up actors and etc. etc. without it having to be a Huge Million Dollar Production#on tv show or movie level. SO then I was thinking about like... just doing commercials. Or music videos. Like shorter things where I still#get the fun of the filming and everything but it's less of an intensive long term project.#So there is an alternate version of me (I suppose if i somehow did not end up having physical and mental health issues#as badly somehow.. or like.. randomly came into wealth and was able to pay my way through a nice college despite missing#days constantly being out because I'm sick or something lol) that works in some corporate advertising office coming up with commercials#and directing or filming them or doing the sets for them or something in that general vicinity.#I also was considering being a corporate psychologist. or whatever its called.. oh from google:#''Industrial and organizational (I/O) psychologists study and assess individual group and organization dynamics in the workplace''#I don't think I even knew what the job entailed. I was at the time just thinking like.. the type of person that comes into a business offic#and gives everyone personality assessments or does MBTI or big-5 testing crap for whatever reason that some businesses get that#done for people. Really i just wanted to be in a Corporate Big Office setting yet still do psychology. Because I used to be really fixated#on living in a big city. Like the ideas of everything being walkable. picking up a coffee in the morning. walking to my job in a Big#Skyscraper Building. people watching in a huge hotel lobby for lunch. flying frequently (I love airplanes and airports aesthetically).#living in an apartment with a giant window overlooking the city. etc. etc. BUT that was before i had really BEEN to a city. Then I actually#hung around a city a few times and went places and I was like... AUGh... The Sensory Overwhelm.. cars people lights loudness noise scary#everything happening all at once. etc. etc. (though even when I wanted to live in a city i NEVER strove for the Night Life. when i say I#enjoy city imagery I mean like... in the day time. Many people who like cities talk about The Night Life and post pictures of cities all#lit up at night and clubs and dancing and restaurants. none of that EVER appealed to me. perhaps a sign I am not a real city person. Like#I am NOT standing in a crowded bar full of loud people in the middle of the night lol.. get AWAY from me!!) but I do adore the#architecture of like bright white clean sterile modern spaces like huge airport lobbies or malls or etc. I think thats what reminded me of#city and what I liked about the idea of that life. Like I always LOVED the layout of schools and hospitals and trainstations and public#transport in general. Though even then I knew enough that I would not be a good architect/city planner. so I guess my adoration for those#spaces was merely to be channeled into LIVING there. but then I realized I didn't even really want to do that that much. I mean I still#definitely aim to live NEAR a city. like the little areas outside of it. I would never live in a rural place 4 hours from anything. I liter#ally just COULDNT since I need close access to hospitals sometimes lol. But I used to want to live in the CENTER of citites like high rise#condo. and now I'm like.... eh....... perhaps a smaller quieter walkable space nearby lol.. ANYWAY.. alternate me in my Business Suit eheh
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illumniousart · 2 months ago
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Pumpkin Tart(WIP)
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ksen-noodles · 3 months ago
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Having more energy with adhd is such a fucking bad experience. A death trap.
LIKE IDK. I DONT KNOWWW
My productiveness absolutely crashes and burns if I am fully energized. Bc I'm distracted and I'm doing 150 things and doing nothing, and absolutely no force on earth will stop me from abandoning a Task and getting serotonin somewhere more lazy and pleasant.
Like what do I do, stay forever trapped in a loop of being just a bit sleep deprived? How do you even do that, eventually it's still majorly sleep deprived.
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rattys-prinxiety-countdown · 6 months ago
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It has been 12 13 days since Prinxiety last interacted
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whentherewerebicycles · 8 months ago
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wow ok lots of things got done today!! virtually all of them by my mom who is a champion and is doing all the baby prep things i can't do because my hands are horribly broken. she put together the crib and the dresser, bought under-the-bed organizers, helped me sort and put away the huge bags of baby clothes people have given me, and is now PAINTING the nursery (and yes it's yet another shade of green i will not be accepting questions or criticisms at this time thank u). anyway this place is so ready for a baby! cannot believe i have five or more weeks left to wait!!!!!! i was also decently productive and got a bunch of work tasks done, then switched gears and wrote a million thank you notes... 26 down, 5 to go!!!
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probablyaseamonster · 2 years ago
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My favorite thing about the Bad Boys so far is that Grian is self-conscious about the skins.
Like I've seen all this cool fanart of them in their cool leather studded jackets and sunglasses but I think y'all are missing out on some comedy by not drawing Grian at least a little shy.
Most entertaining moment at entertainment mountain yet for me was when Jimmy was flexing his skin and Grian was like, and I quote, "I don't wanna", and Bdubs thought it was the coolest thing but Cleo was all like "hang your head in shame".
Like? I don't know how to explain it but I think this is fanfic/fanart material and y'all are missing out.
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kirby-the-gorb · 2 years ago
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phagodyke · 1 month ago
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kind of annoys me sometimes how I can happily listen to my roommate explain the entire plot of whatever she's currently into but when it comes to my interests she can only listen for a few mins before wordlessly walking out of the room
#ive only slept 4 hours and its a sunday so im probably just cranky and getting irrationally annoyed idk.#but i wanted to talk abt revenant gun bc im enjoying it and havent gotten to discuss it w anyone :-(#i dont wanna post on here bc i dont wanna see spoilers and i dont have anything to say that other fans would find particularly interesting#ik half the arcs of the veilguard characters despite the fact ill never play it bc i like listening to her + hearing her opinions#but damn i guess she doesnt gaf shes got better things to do. im not being fair i get we jusr socialise differently n thats fine.#and ik its not true but sometimes i feel like she doesnt like being around me very much bc shes always halfway out the door#and she doesnt suggest we watch shit together anymore n has turned me down the last few times ive suggested it#but ik shes doing shit w other ppl shes always calling n playing games n stuff w other friends so well maybe its a little true#and she acts so strange around me sometimes like she'll move to the other side of the room if i go open the fridge or whatever#like damn girl im not gonna fucking bite u. whats up with the constant 5ft distance. bc u dont ever do that with other friends just me.#and then it pisses me off when it sort of comes up as a side thing to smth else bc it ONLY ever comes up around other ppl she'll never#bring it up directly with me and she'll blame it on me as if we havent had this conversation multiple times where ive explained exactly#why im weird abt shit sometimes and where my boundaries are and what i would like and then nothing at all changes#like last time she brought it up around another friend she was like oh well we can hug more if u want like no we fucking cant bc u act#like we're magnetically repulsed u hate me being in ur space and only tolerate it when we're around other ppl which is why it makes ME#uncomfortable when she does try to be physically affectionate or whatever bc she 100% exclusively does it in front of others#like man u dont have to put on a fucking performance??? or even worse do it just bc u feel guilty abt leaving me out i hate being pitied#even if ik i very obviously do get hurt at being left out. but thats my problem man i would never fuck w someone elses boundaries#i hate hate hate when ppl have inconsistent conditional boundaries and never communicate what the fucking conditions are so theyre#constantly moving the benchposts around and acting unpredictably like how am i supposed to know where they are!!!!!! please#snd then so embarrassing to pointedly say its bc of MY behaviour in front of someone else like oh ok. u couldnt have told me this before.#in private so we could actually communicatr. sorry this has gotten so off track im feeling so gross this morning and everything is#frustrating me im so tired i feel nauseous ughhhh#okay well anyway. got my list of tasks lets just focus on this shit instead before i spend yet another sunday miserably ruminating#.vent#im not actually mad at her or anything like i said we just socialise differently we have different incompatible flavours of autism#and thats not her fault but its just so frustrating that we cant seem to communicate very well. i think im allowed to be frustrated#anyway yeah sorry im leaving it im leaving it. i should go polish my boots before i shower
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rawliverandgoronspice · 10 months ago
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*handing a sloppily-made card to ganondorf with unglued glitter on top* happy women's dayyy
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unsteady-calcium · 2 months ago
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My Breath of the Wild Slow Livin' challenge is in its third iteration and let me tell you it is the only way to play this game
#I stopped fast travelling two playthroughs ago (rule 1)#at the same time as i added the “2) if Pancake (my horse) can physically come with me then he has to come with me wherever I go” rule#for this new playthrough i've added "3) you have to settle down for the evening at a reasonable time#preferably at a stable or otherwise suitable location and then feed Pancake before hunching down in front of a fire#and stare into the flames until morning#ALSO rule 4 the horse cant gallop for longer than a real horse can (ie short bursts)#all other horse travel (ie almost all travel in the game (see rule 2)) has to happen at a trot at MOST#but very recently ive reached Tarrey Town and boy lemme tell you#I already knew id be trotting across the damn continent like five times to get everyone together#but now ive added a new thing where i roleplay escorting each of them back to Tarrey Town AT THE PACE THEY WOULD NATURALLY GO#i.e. walking#I am WALKING my horse back from death mountain and gerudo and everyone else#it's actually so great to roleplay...#Pelison saw a horse for the first time and was in awe#and Grayson had to comfort him when a lightning storm broke out as we were crossing the Akkala span#obviously the Sokkala route would be more direct but Grayson and I decided the northern route was better#since we could spend the night at the stable#Kass was there and he sang for us#Now Ive just made it to Gerudo (it took five in game days)#and I am settling down in Kara Kara for the night to talk to Rhondson about my friend Hudson#The voe with the most beautiful dream in all of hyrule#and if she agrees to come with me we have a LONG walk ahead of us in the morning#this is my favourite playthough ive ever done#breath of the wild#tarrey town#legend of zelda
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orcelito · 2 months ago
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Despite all odds, I have arrived home safely👍
Turns out that the earlier goop was the better goop. The adderall goop. The adderall has worn off now though. So I am. Very incredibly out of it.
But I am home. And I will take my quick shower. And then I will climb into bed.
I do need to eat. But... later...
#speculation nation#im the special kind of tired where im more tired than hungry#which is to say my every cell is yelling at me to get some fucking sleep.#and i dont think id be much more successful at eating rn than i was this morning.#i ate. half a can of chef boyardee. which was half bc i was so focused on typing and half bc i could barely stomach it.#so i at least ate Something. but not as much as normal.#i did have an ensure in the middle of the day. so theres some nutrients too at least.#i'll eat after i get a few hours of sleep. when the edge is no longer so desperate.#and hopefully i'll be able to stomach things better then.#honestly have all nighters always been this hard or am i just getting older? i havent actually pulled an all nighter since uhhh#well there was kind of one on dead dad day. but that day sucked just in general.#last time i think was april '23 when i read t.rimax volume 9-14 within a 24 hour period while also finishing a final presentation.#even then tho i got like 2 hours of sleep. it was still pretty rough though.#like ok i guess those times were pretty awful and also i did get at least some sleep. which is more than today.#so it makes sense for me to be in worse shape rn. i also didnt get as much sleep the night before last as i wanted to#i got... ...maybe 4 hours sleep??? ummm. which isnt a good thing actuslly. no wonder im so fucking exhausted.#i can barely type right now i will be honest. it was so hard to bike home. it took all my focus to not drive off a bridge#or get pushed into traffic by wind. oh boy the wind sure did try.#then i almost tripped down the stairs at my apartment after grabbing the mail bc i Briefly was focused on my mail 🙄#barely present. total mess. but at least im home. and i already did all the thinking i need to do today.#i was brave. i perservered. i was tempted to give up around 6 am ish but i was like No. this is getting done TODAY.#so i did it. i turned it in. and i so bravely did my in class work for my 2nd class. even though i was so mentally not present the whole way#i did my thinking... i am home... rest soon.#actually its kind of funny im lying on my couch rn and i think if most other ppl were in my current state theyd fall asleep right here.#but the power of my insomnia is so. powerful. i am not at risk of falling asleep without meaning to.#only time thats ever actually happened are like. a handful of times i was like. the most tired ive ever been in my life. etc etc.#in fact idk how well i'll be able to fall asleep for my nap. i certainly couldnt last night despite how hard i tried.#hopefully this time... i am truly tired enough....pls i need to rest i am so tired 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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