#it’s 1am in the morning how am I to sleep with this info
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Hearing news that he’s confirmed romanceable (and described as intimate and sensual) got me so giddy I might just expire.
#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#DAtV#emmrich volkarin#my art#this guy is so targeted at me just from design and what little we know of him in the written works#and I’m so mad cos I need him now#ahdidbd#lemme indulge im sorry it’s so rarely I ever get a romance with an older character who’s part of the main cast#it’s so damn rare#so I get stupidly hyper when it happens#my tastes are always stuck being npcs or unattainable cos they’re not usually conventionally attractive#so I’m so so glad for how unique they’re letting us strive for in this#grrrrr#it’s 1am in the morning how am I to sleep with this info#wtf BioWare
609 notes
·
View notes
Note
AITA for telling the upstairs neighbor to be a little quieter at night?
I (26nb) live in an apartment complex. I am on the first floor. This apartment has a noise curfew of 10pm. I have a kid (5) who sleeps at 8pm. We have neighbors around us who also have kids around the same age who go to bed roughly around the same time (we've talked from time to time) including a new neighbor with a young autistic kid. My kid is also autistic. I am also autistic and schizophrenic. The neighbor directly next to us has a dog who tends to bark and howl whenever he hears loud noises. These are important to remember.
This girl moved in some handful of weeks ago right above me. Some days during the day I hear her stomping around REALLY loudly like crazy, and at first I thought that's fine because its just during the day no big deal. But then she started doing it late at night. First night I thought maybe she was still unboxing and stuff, nbd. But this kept going on for weeks from 8pm until nearly 2am every single day. And around 10pm-1am she would play loud music with heavy bass. This would keep me awake at night and prevent me from sleeping, and would cause me to have sensory overload very easily. My kiddo said it scared her to hear the banging and stomping and music upstairs late at night. One night at about 9:30pm, she started banging something FIERCE up there to the point where I actually started having an episode. I thought we were being broken into and I fell into a delusion that was remedied by my partner coming home and helping to ground me. That was my breaking point, and I ended up leaving a note saying, "hi! I wanted to ask if you could please keep the noise a little lower at night, we have young kiddos that live here too. Thank you!" I didn't leave anything to indicate who we were.
The next day she brought back the note to MY door saying "I'll try to be quieter. I didn't think I was that loud. I come home late. It was a Friday night and I was banging chicken at 8pm so I didn't think it was an issue. I just moved in and I'm trying to live my life. Sorry" and left two stuffed animals. Weeks passed and she is still, up to today, being loud late into the night and early morning. My partner can also hear it loud and clear and has complained to me about how disruptive she is. Some other neighbors have come forth saying she's so loud THEY can hear her when they come in through the main door. She's so loud that she's been causing the dog next door to bark like crazy, which is disturbing that poor neighbor as well. We are all kind of fed up with this girl.
Recently, there was a bunch of people who got their packages stolen... Her included. She left a note in the main lobby saying to bring her packages back. Today, we could hear her loudly talking on the phone outside while we were also outside, and she was talking to someone about available renting places outside of our city. We think she might be trying to move out already even though she just got here.
I think I might be the asshole because, between my note and her packages getting stolen, she probably felt unwelcomed here. I don't want people to feel unwelcomed, but I also want to be able to exist in my own home safely and comfortably. Maybe I should have left her alone and just dealt with the noise. My family thinks I was being rude to say anything at all, and my mom said I lost a potential friend by doing that. AITA?
74 notes
·
View notes
Text
Mha relationship headcanons (Class 1-A)
Guess I’m doing headcanons now
(In order of seats cause it’s the first photo order on Google lol)
Gn reader
Yuuga Aoyama
He will lazer anyone who even dares to make fun of them
Always in need of attention
ALWAYS
if y/n is boing homework or something at their desk he’ll just dramatically sit down in their lap
“wHy aReN’t yOu PAyinG aTtENTion tO yOUr pReTtY bOYFriEnd?????”
“My little star” ❤️
Compliment wars
Y/n will compliment him once like “hey your hairs really soft today”
Shots fired
He is a rich kid and no one can convince me other wise
So one day he just randomly buys them like thousand dollar jeans and they just sit there like “???????????????? I mean thank you so much I love it but like ????????????”
Mina Ashido
Yeah she doesn’t have any hoodies anymore
“Girls” night is very important where it’s basically every other night where they sleep in each other’s dorm rooms but instead of going to sleep at 1am they go to sleep at 6am on a Friday
Every morning she puts a ridiculous amount of makeup on y/n and y/n the whole time is like “I am totally willing to go to school like this”
But by the end Mina just wipes it all off :(
Brags about each other CONSTANTLY
Kirishima and Kaminari made a whole mix tap of Bakugo telling them to shut up about each other
With Kaminari’s crappy beat boxing ✨
They both go to Momo’s dorm and all study together (let’s be real they aren’t really studying just kidding around) all the time
(If a female y/n) They get their periods at the same time and it’s so miserable cause they can’t take care of each other 💔
If Mineta hits on either one??
The next day the other will ask to train with him and he’ll think someone finally likes him back but turns out they were just trying to beat him up for revenge
Tsuyu Asui
HATES PDA
DON’T YOU DARE HOLD HER HAND NO
Headcanon she’s aromatic (aromatics can still want a romantic relationship with someone and fall in love and stuff, it’s just really unlikely) (feel free to tell me how it works; I’m in the community but haven’t done a large amount of research on aromatics)
Random compliments
Just randomly “hey *ribbit* your outfits really nice today”
💙 swimming dates or going to the pond💙
Double dates with the rest of the Dekusquad couples
Loudly cheers each other on in training
Y/n gives Tsu a frog plush and she’s to scared to sleep with it thinking she’ll drool on it or something so it’s on a shelf that only has special items
Remembers every little thing like they could say they needs to do something in a few months and Tsu will remind them
Eat Bento Boxes together at lunch all the time 🍱
Once y/n was like “what do I feed the pond frogs?????” And Tsu went on a long rant about how to handle frogs
She has a passion okay
Sends goodnight texts at like 8:30 and y/n finds it hilarious that she literally goes to bed at 8:30
(When they finds out about Bakugo they laughs at him and Deku mutters “he deserves it”)
“I love you” *internal panic, like that one spongebob scenes in his head where there’s a ton of little sponge bobs burning stuff* “uhhh um uh thanks” “WAIT IM SO SORRY I LOVE YOU TO SO MUCH” *bursts into laughter*
Tenya Iida
Study dates where they lose track of time and accidentally stay up till two in the morning
Definition of slow burn
Literally, for two years he clearly had a crush on them but didn’t realize it and at some point Deku and generally the whole Dekusquad got tired of it and Ochaco just yelled at him one day “YOU LITERALLY LIKE Y/N HOW DO YOU NOT NOTICE?!?!?”
He just like o ^ 0
Literally plans every date for weeks
He doesn’t love physical affection, he likes it just not all the time, prefers giving gifts and time to each other
Best listeners ever
(Slightly angsty headcanon) one time he had pulled a bunch of all nighters studying and failed a test from not taking in the info and cried and y/n comforted him :(
Literally thanks the universe every night for y/n because he’s a sweetheart
When his brother gets forced into retirement y/n comforts him SO HARD
Y/n would low key be on board with the “murder stain” plan if Iida told them
Cause they are best friends with his brother
When they first got together and they meet each other they thought he was super intimidating cause he’s the “if you break his heart I’ll break your nose” type but then became really good friends because of how each of them care for Iida (well that was what started it)
Doesn’t get jealous whatsoever
Y/n could literally kiss some guys hand or cheek and he’s just like “their a really friendly person and I trust them”
Arguments on who’s gonna pay for dinner lol and then he’s just like
“Oh my god what we split the Bill” like he just had the best smartest idea ever
And y/n’s like “ :0 that such A good idea!!!!!” Cause they are both semi himbo
Ochako Uraraka
As soon as Ochako said she was poor y/n just started randomly giving her money
“Hey Ochako how’s your day” “oh good good you” “yeah I’m doin good anyways here’s fifty dollars”
She makes y/n a ton of hand made gifts and likes baking for them (I headcanon that she likes baking uwu)
If she buys y/n anything they know she was saving up for it and appreciates the heck out of it
Volunteers at the family business all the time 😌
Her bed is covered in stuffed animals and when she misses y/n she cuddles up to them and y/n find it so sad yet adorable
They would be nervous to tell anyone so it would be a secret for a while
Until one day Deku asks if Ochako wants to study with him and Iida and find them cuddling while reading
He definitely freaks out and blush’s but tells no one
After a few months they do tell the class tho they supportive
Okay the whole Dekusquad and y/n calls All Might Dad
When their older they go to pride parades (even if it’s not a lgbtq relationship) and wear “free mom/ dad/ parent hug” shirt and it’s adorable
Constantly touching each other
Could be hugging or hand holding or even as little as just having their hand on the others shoulder
Both find it werid how they somehow have the same taste in music
Part 1 (gonna be four parts lol wanna do the whole class)
#mha#bnha#my hero x reader#mha x y/n#Aoyama#aoyama x reader#mina ashido#mina x reader#tsuyu x reader#iida x reader#ururaka x reader
164 notes
·
View notes
Note
12 with olivia benson please!
Words: 2550 Remember when I said these were gonna be drabbles… also Nick, Rafael, Mike & Kat are in this because I love them all thx for coming to my ted talk
‘how is my wife more badass than me?’
You groaned as you rolled over to Liv’s side of the bed to turn the blaring alarm off. It took a lot of effort and tries but you eventually managed to turn it off with a huff. You wrapped the blanket around you, closed your eyes and snuggled into Liv’s pillow. You peeped an eye open when you heard Liv chuckle.
“What” you mumbled
“You are just adorable” Liv smiled from the doorway to your bathroom
“Why are you out of bed?” you whined rolling onto you back
“Because although it is your day off my love, it is not mine” Liv said and headed back into the bathroom to continue getting ready.
“But the alarm only just went off. If I’m going to be woken up early on my day off a mere five hours after getting home from my shift, I should get cuddles” you demanded. “I’m not joking” you said as Liv laughed at you. You sat up slightly when you noticed your bedroom door slowly open “here’s my cuddles”
“y/n” Noah ran up and jumped onto the bed and got straight into your arms
“Hello sweet boy, how do you have so much energy at 6 in the morning” you grinned smothering his face with kisses. Noah’s laugh had to up there as one of your favourite sounds, so pure, so innocent. Liv leant against the door frame and watched the two of you together. She had been so nervous when the two of you had started dating about how Noah would take to you, but from the moment he met you, he was glued to your side and you were wrapped around his little finger. Even now, two years into your marriage and nothing had changed.
“See this could have been all yours but now Noah gets all the cuddles” you squeezed him a little tighter making him giggle.
“Alright you two” Liv playfully rolled eyes “Come on Noah let’s get you ready for school before Lucy gets here”
“Nooooo”
“Yesssss” Liv teased him
“But I wanna stay with y/n”
“I can get him ready” you said with a yawn
“The only thing you are going to do is go back to sleep” Liv said
“But-“
“No buts. You didn’t get home until 1am you need to sleep my love” Liv pecked your lips and reached out to Noah, who just snuggled into you “Noah” he whined again. Your schedule had been all over the place lately. You had been doing doubles and night shifts for the last few weeks, you had barely seen Liv let alone Noah, it was no wonder he was clinging to you
“Go on sweet boy, I promise I’ll be there to pick you up after school” you kissed his forehead
“Promise?” He asked holding his pinkie up. You wrapped yours around his.
“Pinkie promise. 3 o’clock. I’ll be there” with the promise of seeing you later agreed on Noah left.
“Get some sleep my love” Liv smiled kissing you again before turning off the lights leaving you to catch up some much-needed rest.
When you woke up again it was nearly 11am. You jumped up pottered around the house, cleaning up Noah’s toys, putting away any dishes and things that were lying around and doing some laundry. These were your favourite type of days, where you just chilled at home, cleaned and were able to do things at your own pace.
“To what do I owe the pleasure Captain” you grinned, answering your phone
“Do I need a reason to call my wife?” Liv asked. You could basically hear her rolling her eyes.
“No, but it is out of the ordinary”
“What are you doing?” Liv asked, changing the subject
“Just about to leave actually, going to meet Jas for lunch at the café down the street. Even put on jeans for the occasion” You locked the door as you headed out to meet your friend.
“Wow fancy…” she trailed off and you could hear her talking to Sonny and Amanda
“How busy are you today?” you asked when you heard her lift her phone back to her ear
“You don’t even want to know… that’s why I called I doubt I’ll be home for dinner”
“It’s okay- “
“No, it's not” Liv cut you off with a frustrated sigh “I need to be home more, I need to spend more time with you and Noah and- “
“And you need to work. Because it’s what you love, because you are helping the people that need it. You are a good police officer, the best actually. Noah and I can handle a few late nights. Besides Noah needs something to be mad about when he’s a teenager” you joked. You smiled as you heard Liv chuckle a little. You hated how much pressure put on herself to be perfect at everything.
“Have I ever told you how much I love you?” Liv asked
“Once or twice but I’ll never grow tired of hearing it”
“I love you”
“I love you too, I’ll see you when I’m looking at you, be safe”
“Always”
“You know you have a stupid look on your face” your friend and co-worker Jas said as you met out the front of the café while hanging up the phone
“It’s called love, you should try it sometime” you teased
“No thank you” Jas replied with a laugh. The two of you sat in the busy café and caught up on everything outside of work. Jas told you about one of the many guys she had on the go at the moment, you gushed about Liv and Noah.
“I mean seriously if I could I’d shove my foot where the sun doesn’t shine” Jas huffed bitching about one of your co-workers.
“I should probably go, need to run a couple of errands before I pick up Noah” You looked at your phone double-checking the time, an hour before you had to get Noah. You and Jas went to stand up when all hell broke loose. Everything changed in a split second. One moment you were sitting there with your friend having an amazing day and the next you were hiding under a table as a man held the café at gunpoint.
“NOBODY MOVE” he screamed turning in a circle with his gun pointed and ready to shoot. “NO ONE MOVES NO ONE CALLS THE COPS” You slowly and quietly got your phone out.
“What are you doing?” Jas whispered, her voice shaking in fear “did you not just hear him?”
“There’s no way I’m not texting Liv” you huffed
Liv sighed as she waited for the coffee machine to brew a new jug. Her eyes felt like they were going to fall out after all the paperwork she had been doing all day. All her detectives had been out either talking to victims or following leads so all she had done today was sit at her desk and do paperwork and reply to emails. Picking up her cup, Liv headed back out to the squad room as she heard everyone return. As Amanda was filling everyone in on the lead that she and Sonny had been following when everyone’s phone buzzed, and officers began moving.
“Café being held at gunpoint” Fin frowned
“Unknown gunman, unknown reason” Kat read from her phone
“I wonder which one” Sonny thought aloud
“Café 98” Liv almost threw her coffee on the nearest desk running into her office to grab her gun and badge.
“How do you know?” Fin asked
“Y/n is there”
Half an hour had passed, you could now hear the sirens of police officers in the distance, Liv responded and told you she was on the way and it was going to be okay. It was only words, but you’d be lying if you said it didn’t make you feel better. The gunman was shouting at the café workers, blaming them for everyone being taken hostage because they didn’t give him money. You took deep breaths and tried to stay calm. The café phone rang, then again and again.
“Someone shut that fucking phone up!” the man yelled
“It’s going to keep ringing” your mouth said before your mind could stop you
“What was that bitch?” He started moving towards you. You slowly stood up, hands in the air.
“The p-phone. It’s the police. They want to talk, and they are going to keep calling until you answer” you stuttered, your confidence slowly falling.
“How would you know?” He sneered “you a cop?”
“No!” you quickly exclaimed “uh no I’m not but I am married to one. My wife is the captain at the 16th” you pulled your phone out of your pocket to show him your lock screen. It was a picture of you and Liv – her in her uniform - when she promoted to captain.
“You answer it then” he motioned with the gun towards the phone. You slowly walked over to the counter, focused on the man and the gun and picked up the phone.
“Hello” you said
“Hello, this is Captain Mike Dodds who is this?” you breathed a sigh of relief at the familiar voice.
Olivia jumped out of the car at the scene, almost before Fin had actually stopped the car. It was chaos. Uniforms were holding back the public as well as journalists. There were lights flashing and being screaming. Olivia could hear people asking if it was a terrorist attack but right now, she didn’t care about motive, all she wanted was to get you out of there. Flashing her badge, she and the rest of the squad were let through and they headed towards ground zero.
“Who’s in charge?” Liv asked a nearby uni who pointed her in the direction. She had a small smile when she saw Mike and Nick hunched over a table. “Captain Dodds, Sargant Amaro”
“Liv” the pair frowned “what are you guys doing here? This is major crimes’ not svu”
“y/n is in there” Fin said
“So what do you know?” Liv asked
“Not a lot. No contact has been made yet. We’re about to try again” Nick said as Mike lifted the phone to his ear.
“Hello, this is Captain Mike Dodds who is this?” Mike asked, his eyes met Liv and he quickly put the phone onto speaker. “y/n is anyone hurt?
“No, no one is hurt. There’s probably about 30 of us in here” hearing your voice was music to Liv’s ears. Mike asked you a few more questions, not that you were able to give him much more information.
“Mike, I need you to tell Liv someone has to get Noah, I was supposed to pick him up from school and he’s going to be so upset if I’m not there” Liv turned to her squad, she hadn’t even thought of Noah.
“I’m on it” Sonny nodded pulling his phone out and moving away from everyone.
The fact that Mike was the person on the other end of the line made you a little less anxious. You tried to give him as much info as possible, but the gunman was not giving you anything, he wouldn’t even tell them what he wanted.
“Mike, I need you to tell Liv someone has to get Noah, I was supposed to pick him up from school and he’s going to be so upset if I’m not there and-“
“Alright that’s enough” the gunman grabbed the phone out of your hand and hung up. You quickly moved back to your spot under the table. The gunman was growing anxious, pacing around the room, it was clear he didn’t have a plan.
“There’s a back door” Jas whispered “a few of us could get out”
“I’ll distract him”
“I think Liv would kill me if I left you in here” Jas huffed
“If you get out the police can get it, she’ll live with it” you slowly stood back up “you should really stay away from the windows”
“What?” the man spat at you
“The police, they’ll be looking for a spot for a sniper to take you out” you walked towards him, moving around so he kept his eyes on you. Jas and a couple others started to creep towards the door. You were racking your brain trying to remember everything Liv had ever told you about hostage situations.
“Shouldn’t you stay away from the windows to then?”
“My wife’s a cop. You don’t think she’s out there?” you chuckled “And the guy on the phone before? He was her number 2 not too long ago, he got promoted not too long before my wife, he goes to my son’s dance recitals, he’s not gonna let anything happen to me. I doubt there is an officer that doesn’t know what I look like. They aren’t going to shoot me, but they will shoot you” your eyes swept the room quickly, Jas was out.
“Then maybe I should just shoot you” he held the gun to your face. You held your breath and closed your eyes. You thought of Liv and Noah and how much you loved them. Suddenly the back door opened and your eyes shot open.
“NYPD!” the gunman’s attention turned to the police officers, then, without thinking you grabbed the gun and his arm, flipping him to the ground. You quickly ripped the gun from his hand and took it apart.
“Seems you learnt some tricks over the years” Mike grinned coming up to you as one of the other officers handcuffed the man. You wrapped your arms around him and relaxed, you were okay, everyone was okay.
“She’s out there right?” you needed your wife right now
“did you expect her to be anywhere else?” Nick smirked joining you and Mike. He wrapped his arm around you too “took almost everyone to keep her from busting through the door herself” you grinned at that. Classic Liv. Mike and Nick lead you out the front door of the café. The moment you stepped out you found Liv. She was standing with Jas and the rest of the squad. Her eyes locked with yours and you thought you were going to start crying. The two of you ran to each other, throwing your arms around the other.
“Oh my love” Liv squeezed you “are you okay? Are you hurt?”
“I’m okay” you whisper into her neck
“She’s more than okay” Mike said, you pulled back from Liv’s arms. The rest of the squad joined you. “not only did she distract him to get those guys out, when we came in she grabbed his gun and disarmed him”
“Nice” Kat grinned, clearly impressed
“How is my wife more badass than me?” Liv grinned and kissed your forehead
“Learnt from the best” you responded “Noah…”
“All covered, Raf’s got him” Sonny said “He’s no y/n but I’m sure Noah was just as excited to see Uncle Rafa”
“Probably more” you laughed, you grabbed Liv’s hand and squeezed “Let’s go see our son”
“Anything you want my love” Liv kissed your lips “I’m so proud of you”
#law and order svu#law and order svu imagines#law and order fanfic#Olivia Benson#olivia benson x reader#olivia benson imagine#olivia benson fanfic
188 notes
·
View notes
Text
South Of The Equator
Summary: Gestures of love are woven in the fabric of relationships, especially ones built around the priority of your love
Word Count: literally juuuuust shy of 5.8k
Warning: pining, love and fluff
Author Notes: Muse fell in love with this photo last week when Bre threw it out onto my dash, spit out stupid notes at midnight that night for it along with about 350ish words and then didn’t touch it until again yesterday evening where I proceeded to crank out about 5.8k in less than 24 hours. Oops?
This falls well later into the verse, like the latest I’ve taken it thus far. It just felt right to bring this into that part of the timeline with the premise and where the muse was taking this. Can be read as a standalone but diving into the verse and the masterlist would give a little bit more understanding.
It was not in the plans. Whatsoever. A whim. A lot of longing. A lot of missing connections. A lot of feeling that this was a sync you just wouldn’t be able to get. That scares the both of you, more than either of you will let on especially to the other. You both promise that this would be the longest stretch on this very last swing – something like 48 or 50 days depending on travel for both of you, that a somewhere between 12 and 14-hour plane ride at best for a long weekend made no sense. You’re in Bucharest when he starts the swing in Mexico. What was thought to be a few days off for him to come home to see you between the last Mexico show and the venture further south becomes non-existent, with surprise pop up concerts in both Costa Rica and Panama along with hoopla surrounding them on either side that the label drops last minute. You initially think you’d be able to make the last shows, but there was a potential work trip to Hong Kong hanging over your head, so you both agree not book anything.
Well, love makes you do some stupid and irresponsibly crazy things. When the Asia client pushes their timeline back, things change completely. Which is why you find yourself on the phone, trying to make arrangements while juggling 7 open browser tabs on your laptop at nearly 1am. This is what you do for each other. It’s been established. It’s been done for each other on numerous occasions throughout your relationship. But it’s never been something like this. This grand and involved.
“Up for a bit of a challenge?” you start. “What’s the actual schedule like between Buenos and Rio and Santiago?”
“Flip it around. Chile first. Then Buenos then Sao Paulo. Finish off in Rio,” Beatriz laughs. “Don’t book the wrong flight. Cause. This is where it’s going isn’t it? This bugger is so lucky to have you. He best appreciate this. He’s been whiny. More to Cez then me. Andrew too, but he trusts Cez more when it comes to you.”
“He’s not the only one,” you sigh. “Dee’s taken to sending me videos and photos of Tali every day before I call to bitch to her to try to ease my tension. We’ve done longer, when we first got together. This one though. We’re just not taking it well, either of us. It feels off. He can’t come to me, so I have to go to him.”
“There’s doubles now in Santiago, not just in Buenos and Rio. Only the one in Sao Paulo. Days off scattered through, but definitely some between the city jumps. Are you really going to try to do just a weekend down here?” she asks.
“Work remote if I can swing it. Then bank out on some time off. I’m due after the extra hours to lock in the Danish project and the haul to Bucharest for basically a 48-hour lookie loo from them with no commitments. Boss lady is great as long as my work gets done and I don’t pull the ask for ‘but my famous boyfriend’ very often, if at all,” you explain, poking away at the keys of your laptop.
“Ooh Denmark, so you going to get out for that one?” Beatriz questions. “Do you have a lam for this tour? Should we get you another?”
“I think I can, timing looks ok and I may be able to drag Shawn with me for once since it’s after all this hoopla,” you mutter, poking at Kayak and cursing. “I think I do, snag one just in case if it’s not too much trouble. It looks like Air Canada has a direct from Pearson to Santiago at 11 hours of flight time and an overnight red-eye. Bless it. No layovers. Less chance for him to even let on. Y’all can sneak me in on the flights between yeah?”
“Shawn is gonna shit you know this right?” she laughs. “I heard about your surprises you both have pulled on each other before, but this is something else. Duh girl, yes of course. He’d have you sit on his lap the whole flight if he had to, but we definitely have the room. Give me the flight info. I’ll make Cez book it. Do not even think about clicking that buy button that I know you’re hovering over.”
“Bea...” you begin.
“No, not hearing it. Cez blocked out travel budget for him to go home and you know that didn’t happen, so your flight there and then back with him at the end it is instead,” Beatriz interjects. “I’ll loop in C for sure. Maybe Andrew. Less folks who know the better, we need to keep this on lock down.”
“Beatriz, you’re the best. I owe you big time. I’m so glad you’re on this rag tag motley crew,” you thank her. “Let Cez know if he needs anything when he’s booking, if they don’t have it saved to just let me know.”
“Bottle of Bulleit and you finally spill the recipe for those kitchen sink bars the boys are always raving about and inhaling, we’ll call it even,” she deadpans. “But no really, I’m glad to help. As much as I tease that boy of yours, I’ve got a soft spot for him. We need to figure an epic reveal. It’s late. I’ll fire off a text to Cez and we’ll be on it tomorrow. Off with you. Night!”
You have a week between that call and your flight down to get all your things in order luckily. Work is understanding and accommodating, your boss practically sending out the out of office email for you after she hears your plans. He meanwhile has a few shows in Ecuador, Peru and Bolivia ahead of him within that same time frame.
“There’s that face I adore,” you smile through FaceTime as you’re tucked in bed, two nights before you’re due to leave. “Hi you. How was the show? Where are you now?”
“Just out of the shower in the hotel and about to fall face first into bed, but I needed a dose of my pretty girl before I do,” he exhales, running a hand though his mess of wet curls. “Good, crowds down here are something else. Beyond the first time I swung through, on the last tour. And them singing back in perfect English still breaks my brain a little. Tired though. Looking forward to the break. Day break here, then like a half one off in Santiago before the last few shows. It’s so crazy to think we’re there already.”
“I can’t believe it’s almost over,” you murmur. “You did it baby, an entire circle of the globe. I’m beyond proud of you.”
“As much as I love this, I’m ready for just me, you and our bed. At least for a week straight, if not a few of them,” he chuckles. “Remind me of how tired I am now when I start to say I’m twitchy or bored, ok?”
“If you say so,” you say sleepily. “Just remember, I get to drag you with me on some my work trips next. Denmark for sure. Hong Kong perhaps since that’s still a moving target. Maybe Prague. Wanna be a silly romantic tourist with you for a bit. Just me and you”
“Always me and you, sweetheart. Go get some sleep. You’ve got work in the morning,” he whispers. “We can talk more tomorrow, promise.”
“You sure?” you fight back a yawn, eyes starting to flutter. “Can you sing to me though? Please? I miss you. Be like you’re here.”
He starts humming at first, the eases into a slowed down, Shawn-esque version of Sam Smith’s Latch. You want to stay awake to hear the whole thing, but he sounds like he’s there singing it right into your ear while he’s got your back against his chest. It’s so pretty, easy and dream like that you drift off in moments. He watches you for a few minutes after he finishes the song, making sure you’re truly asleep. Plus, he just wants to feel like he’s next to you in bed.
“Goodnight and sleep well, baby,” he whispers before disconnecting from FaceTime, a small smile slipping across his lips.
“He still has no clue by the way, so you’ve done a bang-up job,” Cez explains as he rings you while you’re in the car on the way to Pearson. “You’re still running on time from what we checked so you’re good. We’ve got everything square. Bea will come snag you from the airport, you’ll have time to hit the hotel, she’ll have the extra room key for you so you can get some actual rest and then get ready. Figure we’ll grab you while he’s doing Q&A. Do you want to surprise him before the show? After?”
“During?” you laugh, leaning your head back against the headrest as the car makes its way down the 401. “Maximum effect. Con would be on my side too you know, epic footage.”
“Of course, you do,” he retorts. “I should have known. Don’t forget, I’m on your side too. I’m glad this worked. I know it’s been a long stretch. For the both of you. I’ve seen it wear on him, but he’s put up a good front minus a few nights where he ends up with me until he needs to get to sleep, just needing someone who understands to talk to.”
“I’m glad he has you, that we both have you. You are a gift, Cez, really,” you reply as the car slows to ease up to the terminal. “I’m just about to hop out. I’ll text you and Bea when I land in the morning, customs will probably take a bit to get through. Thank you again.”
“Fly safe, dear. Try to get some rest and we’ll see you tomorrow,” he responds.
Check in was easy, of course they went above and beyond on the flight. You text Cez and Bea a photo of a cookie from the lounge with your ticket telling them they did not need to and thanking them. Cez responds first.
Again, you know if he found out we flew you like in row 24 on a flight that long, he would pitch a fit. I’m not up for a Shawn fit this late into the last of the last legs of tour. Enjoy the space and the lay flat. Sunshine and that boy awaits you.
Beatriz chimes in next.
Label owes you and the pain in the arse, so enjoy it! Have one for me. I’ll be there for you tomorrow with bells on and a tea in hand. Cannot wait for this – so epic. You two are nauseatingly adorbs.
The flight wasn’t crowded thankfully and the room to stretch fully is a welcome bonus. You are able to wind down a lot easier than expected and get a decent amount of sleep especially given it was on a flight, lay flat or not. Despite an extra circle, you land only a few minutes past your initial arrival time, make it through customs quickly and thankfully your luggage is waiting for you once you’re done.
“There she is,” Beatriz calls out as you head out to the open concourse. “And in one piece too with all your bits and bobbles. Good, the boss won’t be angry. And as promised, your tea!”
“Which one?” you chuckle, snagging the iced chai before hugging her.
“I can handle Cez, your man though,” she rolls her eyes as you walk out to the sprinter van. “He tried you last night when we were coming back from dinner, couldn’t get through even though we all told him it was late. He got all sad puppy. You were just about taking off, so it made sense. If he only knew what today is bringing him. I’ll drop you at the hotel, sleep, shower, eat, do whatever. I’ll be round to grab you about 4.”
As soon as you step into his room, you are overwhelmed just by the sheer sense of being back in his space again, despite him not even being there at the moment. You drop your suitcase, strip and crawl immediately into his still unmade bed to surround yourself in the smell of him. Setting your alarm before you drift off, you curl yourself around his pillow and exhale. Only a few more hours and you’ll be able to wrap your arms around him instead of a goose down that carries whiffs of his scent. A deep breath, an inhale you hold just for a moment before letting it go carefully and you’re drifting away.
You wake shortly before the alarm and to a couple texts from Shawn.
Miss you pretty girl. Almost there.
FaceTime after the show tonight? Even just for a few, I can tuck you in from here again like the other night.
Saw this on the drive over before, couldn’t help but think of you.
It was a slightly angled photo out the car window, but it was of a park with a fountain surrounded by high bushes littered with flowers.
I wish I could press you into those blooms and kiss you. Would make such a pretty picture. Love you baby.
You will yourself not to cry. That sweet, sentimental boy of yours. You’ll have time, you need to make that happen tomorrow.
I miss you sweetheart, so much. Yes to tonight, I’d love a tuck in from you. We’re so close. Love you <3
A shower, some primping and a good battle with both your blow dryer and your travel steamer later, you’re finally ready to head out.
“He’s a lucky bastard this one,” Beatriz whistles before handing over your new credential as you slide the van door closed behind you. “Don’t you have any sisters you can send my way? Cousins?”
“Sorry Bea, only child,” you laugh, as the van pulls away. “Cousins are stateside and not your type.”
“He was happy to hear from you before. Stopped in the middle of sound check to look at his phone. Got all stupid smiley and googly eyed,” she rolls her eyes. “He’s so gone on you if it wasn’t so bloody sweet to see him so gushy, it would make me ill.”
“Just wait ‘till later. I should apologize now,” you explain.
“Why there’s no plans for post-show, dearie. We knew better,” she giggles. “Shawn’s not going to want to share.”
You can’t help but smile as you pass the park he sent you the photo of earlier, it’s prettier than his shot let on. You definitely have to go there tomorrow. From that point, it’s a windy way through the streets of Santiago to the arena.
“He should just be wrapping up,” Beatriz prattles, looking at her watch as you make your way through the bowels of the building. “Which is good, I can sneak you into Cez’s room without him sniffing about. You, he, Jake and Con still need to hash everything out yeah?”
“Kind of. It’s the fine tuning of details at this point,” you say, flipping the pass around in your hands before slipping it around your neck as you walk, still not fully grasping you’re going to see him as soon as you are. “It’s a matter of where to go in the pit during his walk up to stage where I won’t be spotted too easily, but also not be in the way of everything either. I think it’ll work, totally up to Jake though. Worse case, we’ll do it just before rally or he hits the stage. Better visuals, and Con will agree with me, but it’s Jake and Cez who have final call.”
“It’s brilliant, all of it. However, here is where I leave you for now,” Beatriz nudges you through the door into Cez’s makeshift office for the next two days. “Need to make sure the sound techs have everything. Fridge is stocked, so steal what you need. He should be back in a few. They’re due to be walking your man now. His room isn’t far, so stay put. I’ll let C know you’re here. Toodles!”
Shortly after you settle in on the couch, engrossing yourself in your inbox, you feel someone settle down next to you.
“Thank god you’re here, I cannot do the sad Shawn shit anymore,” Connor sighs, throwing an arm around your shoulder. “I love him like a brother but damn, this go has been a beast when he’s feeling it like that.”
“Hi Connor, I’ve missed you too Connor, it’s good to see you Connor,” you roll your eyes, pushing his arm off you with a poke.
“Yeah yeah, all that too,” he smiles, sliding his arm back into place and kissing your cheek. “It’s good to have you here, all that aside. Despite all that, missed you around these parts.”
“Considering Central America took away our long weekend together, with no warning. It’s just been a hard go this swing. For both of us. May just be the wear and tear of a tour this long finally hitting. Even with as much as we’ve made it a priority to stay more connected and grounded. You guys are lucky it’s the end and it didn’t happen in like the middle of Europe, or the US leg. Though that would have been easier to get to than an almost 11-hour flight,” you fight out.
“You’re too good for him you know?” he teases. “Remember, he has friends if you ever need to bail.”
“Not any of y’all that’s for sure. No way. And, it’s the other way around, Con,” you reply, poking at his knee. “So, you’ve seen the setup, what’s going to make the most sense?”
“We’re going to do whatever you want, missus,” Jake chimes in as the door shuts behind him and Cez. “Only thing I require is a hug.”
“I think that can be arranged,” you say happily, ducking around Connor to get to Jake. “Con, stop being in the way.”
“Thank you,” you murmur to Jake as he pulls you into an embrace.
“We should be thanking you,” he whispers hugging you tightly. “And seriously. We’ll make it all happen. Kid needs this as much as you do.”
You pull away, smiling. “Ok guys so here’s what I’m thinking. Let’s surprise him on the walk out.”
The details come together quickly as well as easily. You’re happy, the team is comfortable with it all. It also helps he’s not expecting a thing. Everyone’s on board.
“So,” Cez begins, rolling a bottle of water around in his hands as everyone else filters out. “Hop a flight on a whim in the states or Canada is one thing. Cross the pond, a little more effort, but doable. This is something else entirely, even for the two of you.”
“I don’t know why this one is so different; I wish I knew; believe me I do. It would have saved me an 11-hour flight,” you utter. “It’s not like we’ve not done it before. We got through this, worse even, when he went out on last leg of the last tour and I had no leverage to take time off to come out other than that last show. We were only together a little bit at that point.”
Cez smiles his all-knowing smile, looking down at your hands playing with your credential. “I think you do, somewhere in there. I think he does too, well I know he does.”
“What are you talking about?” you ask inquisitively. “We’re good, really good. Minus this blip and it’s just us being a little more emotionally wound together. More in the groove than we’ve ever been. It’s been great, actually.”
He smiles yet again, making you wonder even more, and picks up his hand pointing to a certain finger.
“No,” you shake your head.
He nods, still smiling. “You’re practically there already. We were honestly all surprised it didn’t happen before tour, or at break. Especially after Japan. I knew though not the holidays, it’s too cliché and not him, or you. He’s asked me a few things, more recently. Won’t give away more than that, but it kind of all makes sense. At least to me.”
“I just. Like. Shit Cez,” you sigh, looking down at the lam in your hands. “We’ve talked about it before, couple times. We want it, both of us. He’s it for me, and vice versa. He knows I’ll say yes. I’ve told him as much. But I’m also not that girl that needs the pretty on her hand to know where we stand in our relationship. He’s also not that overly possessive man who needs to prove he’s got me like that to the world, even in his crazy whirlwind of a life.”
“I think it’s both of you really ready for what’s next and this just all happens to be in the way right now. But, you’re here now, which not only is he going to be over the moon about, the rest of us are pretty happy as well. Not just because he’ll be in better spirits, it’s because we love you just as much too,” he states plainly. “You’re as much a part of this, a part of the family. I’m personally glad you’re here for these last few. This run’s been special, you should be here for the end of it.”
“Do not make me ruin my makeup, damnit,” you half laugh, half bite back a sob. “I’m so glad he has you, not just on the road, but in general. I know how much he loves you. I do, too.”
His phone pings rapidly.
“Ten-minute warning for fetching him. Let’s go get you out and set. Phil’s on you until Jake walks out with Shawn,” he states, reaching for his headset in one hand, for you with his other.
You carefully walk down the back hallway towards the stage together. Jake and Phil meet you at the back corner of the build out. Jake hands you off a fresh pair of earplugs.
“You’re going to need these,” he reminds you. “It’s his usual walk, so he won’t expect a thing. Especially seeing Phil at that junction of the barricade, once Phil gets the signal from me that we’re going, he’ll shift behind you so Shawn can spot you.”
You throw him a thumbs up as you wedge the plugs into place. Phil takes your arm in his, his other hand patting your forearm.
“Let’s go surprise him,” he says, leading you out to the pit.
For some reason, probably your conversation with Cez if you’re being honest with yourself, has your stomach set off with butterflies. You’ve not been like this since the early days of your relationship. Excited, always. Happy, without a doubt. Nervous though? No. You try to not shift about, instead closing your eyes to take in the moment. The crowd is loud, you can smell the remnants of the smoke machine test earlier lingering in the air.
Phil taps your shoulder, sliding you into place in front of him.
“He’s walking,” he mouths with a wink.
The house lights come down and the stage lights start to just warm. You exhale and lean back onto Phil slightly, whose hands come to rest comfortably on your shoulders. The opening video starts to roll and the lights hit the pit walk so you know you’ve got about 30 seconds at best before he comes into view. Phil pushes you forward just a touch just as you spot Jake and Shawn with Connor shuffling just behind to get the right angle for the surprise.
He’s in his pre-show zone, not taking in much around him. Jake nudges him though and his eyes shoot up. Shawn looks over towards you, taking a moment for things to register, and when it does his smile is as bright as you’ve seen. His eyes grow wide, he turns to Jake, who nods with a grin and then Shawn takes off in a sprint.
“Surprise!” you try to scream, but he’s already got you in his hold lifting you to swing you around.
“Tell me I’m not dreaming, please,” he utters in your ear before pulling you closer, finally getting you back on your feet.
You slide your hands from his shoulders, one to the nape of his neck fingering the wispy curls there, the other to nudge his one in-ear out.
“Not a dream, baby. Very much here, very much real. You got me for the rest of the run, love,” you say directly into his ear. “Go be my Rockstar. I’ll watch side stage, be there waiting for you after the show.”
You pop his in-ear back into place then cup his cheek, watching his eyes roll back slightly.
“I love you so damn much,” he yells before kissing you soundly. “I am so lucky you’re mine.”
Shawn rubs his nose against yours before sneaking in another kiss, then runs up to the stage with Jake on his heels. Jake winks as he passes, throwing a double thumbs up before Phil takes you towards the back staircase so you can set up on the rolling case you know is waiting for you.
The show is electric as always, but he’s got a special energy tonight. You can’t help but feel a bit happy as to probably being the reason why. He’s smiling, sweaty and disheveled, running back towards you in the break before the encore.
“You’re a mess,” you quip with a smile, handing him a bottle of water and a towel.
“Never minded that before,” he retorts back, running a hand through the mess of his hair after wiping his face down with the towel.
“Not the place Shawn Peter,” you say, shooing him away. “Go finish, I’m not going anywhere.”
He drops the water bottle down on the case next to you, stealing another kiss before bopping his way back out.
You hop off the case and head out towards the curtain line to get a better view. His encore covers have been something else this tour. He’s been leaning hard into Tom Petty’s Free Fallin’ and it’s a stunner, especially just him and the piano.
“I had a surprise tonight delivered to me just before the show, a really amazing one actually,” he begins as he settles into playing the piano. “So, if you all don’t mind, I’m going to play something a little special before I get into my last two songs.”
Once he hits the first few chords, your jaw drops immediately.
“You lift my heart up when the rest of me is down. You, you enchant me, even when you're not around. If there are boundaries, I will try to knock them down. I'm latching on babe now I know what I have found,” he sings and you can’t help but inch closer to the edge as far as you can go without being spotted or seen. “I feel we're close enough, I wanna lock in your love. I think we're close enough, could I lock in your love, baby? Now I got you in my space, I won't let go of you. Got you shackled in my embrace; I'm latching on to you.”
You didn’t expect this the other night, so you very much don’t expect it tonight. You can’t do anything but watch him, enamored and amazed. He sounds breathtaking. The whole song just gives you goosebumps, especially in a setting like this. Damn this boy.
“Thanks for indulging me tonight, Santiago,” he says and you can see the flush spreading across his cheeks, even from there. He immediately segues into Free Fallin’ to get his encore moving, before finishing completely with If I Can’t Have You.
He’s got a hold of your hands the moment he’s out of sight of the audience.
“Did you like it?” he asks, dipping his head down to kiss you, feather soft.
“Love it, love you,” you reply, dusting kisses across his knuckles. “Come on, let’s get you back there before they start to think we’re defiling a case on the stage.”
He chuckles, tangling his fingers deeper with yours before leading you towards his dressing room. As you hit the main hallway, most of the band and the crew are waiting there and start whooping and clapping the moment the two of you come into view.
“What the hell?” you question, as he holds your hand tighter trying to make your way down the hall. He shakes his head, cheeks pink as he bites his bottom lip.
“Hold up,” Jake stops you both just before the doorway to his room, arms crossing against his chest and a shit eating grin spread across his face. “Believe you owe this lady a thank you.”
“Hello, the song, on stage, the encore? In front of the whole damn audience,” he retorts, running his free hand through his curls before tugging you towards him and the door without getting you covered in post-show sweat. “Now I’d like to shower, get the heck out of here so I can spend some time with her. Without an audience.”
You can hear the snickers and wolf whistles, it’s your turn to flush. Jake shakes his head no.
“You know what you assholes, fine,” Shawn sighs before rolling his eyes.
“Don’t even with me kid,” Jake smirks.
“I know what you’re…” he trails off but tugs your hand, so you stand closer to him. “Shit. C’mere baby.”
The next thing you know he’s cupping your neck and kissing the breath straight out of you. Your hands fly up, one gripping his shoulder the other tangling in his hair. He pulls away first, just as breathless as you’re feeling.
“You all happy now? Can I please get into my room?” he asks.
Jake moves aside, patting him on the shoulder. He snatches your hand and tugs you into the room, shutting and locking the door behind you both.
“Do I even want to know?” you say, leaning back against the door as he toes off his boots.
“Grander the gesture, bigger the thank you,” he replies, stripping off his button down next, his tank and jeans follow. “They like to tease, you know this. Especially when you and I start getting the way we do. It’s all in good fun, but not when you pull the most epic surprise and I’ve run through a whole damn show. I haven’t seen you in how long and I still haven’t really held you or loved on you the way I want to.”
“Then you best go shower, sweetheart,” you tease. “You know feeling is mutual.”
He darts over to kiss you again, “Be right back.”
He’s quick, which you appreciate, and even more that he’s just in a pair of threadbare, low slung navy sweats when he heads back out to you. He drops the towel in his hand to snag yours, pulling you towards the couch. He flops down first and pulls you immediately down on top of him. He kisses your forehead before scooting you down so your head can rest comfortably on his shoulder. He smells fresh, clean, warm, like him and like home.
“Hi baby,” he murmurs against your lips before kissing you slowly and thoroughly. “Fuck, how I missed you. I can’t believe you’re here. I’m so damn happy that you’re here. You’re amazing you know that? How did you pull this off?”
“Once Hong Kong pushed timeline, I had a little wiggle room, but I wouldn’t be sure until Denmark signed off,” you explain, finger carefully tracing back and forth against his collarbone and shoulder. “I didn’t want to get either of our hopes up, so I didn’t say anything. Then like a week and a half ago? That night we just couldn’t get timing together I think you were in Panama still. I was up and cranky at stupid o’clock, said screw it. I knew I had some comp time due, had a little vacation time left, plus after Bucharest debacle on their part, they kind of owe me to boot. Called Bea, looped in Cez and voila.”
“You’re making it harder to even come remotely close to do for you what you do for me,” he presses his lips against your hair. “I’m so grateful for you.”
“There’s not a tally, sweetheart. We do for each other, you know this,” you remind him. “You and me, always right?”
There’s a knock on the door and jingling of keys, you go to move but Shawn holds you to him.
“Just gonna be C, we’re not doing anything. You stay put,” he wraps his arms around your waist and nuzzles your ear.
“Sorry kids, time to get a move on,” Cez calls out from the doorway. “Can I come in? Are you at least PG?”
“It’s cuddling man, that’s all,” Shawn barks out with a laugh as you bury your head into his neck.
“You’ve got about 10 minutes to get yourselves together before the sprinter gets here,” he reminds you both. “We’ve got a curfew in the building overall, so we can’t be late on this one.”
“I’ll make sure he’s ready,” you reply, trying to wiggle out of his hold. “Let’s go, you. Need to get your stuff together. Can’t be late.”
“Listen to your girl, Shawn,” Cez remarks. “She’s right. Plus, you’ll be free of us and interruptions once you’re back at the hotel. Late call tomorrow since we’re already set here. I’m leaving the door unlocked and open so no funny bunny ok?”
“Thanks, Cez. See you in a few,” you say, trying to nudge at Shawn.
“You know that means we can go to that park in the morning,” you whisper, kissing his chin once Cez is back out in the hallway. “Upsy daisy dear.”
He sighs dramatically, but with a smile, “Only if you promise a little morning love, breakfast in bed and that park in the morning.”
“You drive such a hard bargain,” you giggle. “It’s a deal.”
He kisses you quickly and loudly before sitting up with you still in his hold, “I can’t wait to get you alone alone tonight.”
“Which would be sooner if you got a move on,” you roll your eyes, poking at his chest while his hands palm you ass.
He stops for a moment though, looks at you softly while not taking his eyes off of you.
“Love you pretty girl,” he declares, hand pushing stray strands of your hair away from your cheek, before holding it in his palm.
“Love you too, Shawn.”
#shawn mendes#shawn peter raul mendes#shawn mendes imagine#shawn mendes imagines#shawn mendes fic#shawn mendes fanfic#shawn mendes fanfiction#shawn mendes story#shawn mendes stories#shawn mendes oneshot#shawn mendes fluff
174 notes
·
View notes
Note
congrats on 5.5k!! you're insanely talented and I'm so happy you're getting the recognition you deserve 🥺🥺 could i join in the ship requests too?
I'm a rather small sized (like, 154cm & ~40kg kind of small) Asian female from a South East Asia country and i prefer men, especially men who are taller and Age Gaps™ 🥴 I'm not sure how much you know about/believe in astrology but I'm a Libra sun, Taurus rising and Capricorn moon so you can do what you want with that 😂
I'm an INTP/INFP (I've gotten both an equal number of times from sites OTHER than 16 personality, tho I personally vibe with INTP just a teeny smidge more) if you do MBTI ✌🏼 I LOVE to read, especially fanfiction lmao, and i also write! I really love listening to music + watching shows/movies too! My favourite shows are all mystery/crime based LOL and I am working towards becoming a criminal psychologist/forensic pathologist/forensic scientist in future! (heavily inspired by Criminal Minds, Sherlock, Detective Conan and the like so 😂) I have a really vivid and good imagination please i can spend DAYS just daydreaming and imagining scenarios that I never finish writing about & generally this is how all my work is never finished loll
I'm the eldest sibling at home, and my parents haven't always been around so I've been rather used to stepping up and taking care of myself (+ my sibling, like helping them with homework and all). Some people say I'm a natural born leader? idk bc I often step up to be the leader in group work & I'll often be the one to initiate things & all. I'm a rather big procrastinator though LOLL so you'll often catch me rushing my assignments & final projects & rushing my revision for exams + finals like, 2 days before the actual exam 💀 which often leads to me becoming more stressed out & breaking down more often than i actually should so 🥲 I'm trying to quit this bad habit though
I love cuddles and hugs please I will KILL for cuddles and hugs from my back by a tall character pls it just feels so safe and comforting to be spooned too 🥺🥺 sometimes when I'm too absorbed in work or something (which happens too often for it to be healthy) I might just forget to eat/sleep entirely AND also my sleep routine isn't the best. like i will literally fall asleep at 9pm, wake up in the middle of the night on my own at like, 1am, then usually I'll be rushing homework at this time, then maybe sleep again for a short while from 4ish? till when i have to get up for school/work at 5:30/6am 💀 there's been days where i literally looked so sick from the lack of sleep where my tutor once stopped the class to ask me if I was okay and if i was going to faint LMAO 😔 i feel like I'm a night owl??? but then also i have no problem getting up super early in the morning so?? but i really feel most at home and really enjoy the 3am nights 😌
i am also the class clown lol but it's bc i just make sarcastic comments and all and my friends think they're funny???? but also i enjoy making people laugh bc sometimes i find it interesting to try and see what kind of things make my friends laugh so it's lowkey an experiment? or like something i want to achieve? at this point. I'm fluent in English and Chinese/Mandarin and I'm learning Italian so I roughly know some basics, and I really enjoyed History, which I took last year but dropped this year. (I'm taking English Literature with Biology + Chemistry this year and they're all great, except I'm literally dying from the workload aaahhh 💀)
I'm kinda clumsy and Not Good™ at most sports, maybe passably okay for badminton but I'm really not that athletic and really not very keen on exercising either 😔 I'm quite creative and good with public speaking/creative writing/impromptu performance/speech though I'd say! I'm also in my school's drama club 😎 though I'm more of a backstage lights & sounds kind of person. I'm right handed (with a really neat handwriting, as I've been told many, many, many times) and I wear thin frame spectacles which I sometimes will fall asleep in & I'm so clumsy/careless that I'm actually really afraid I'd break them (it's happened before 😭)
I'm a really good planner? like i can do up a great and detailed schedule/plan for revision and all but i will NOT stick to what i plan 😭😭 i love to snack!!!! on chips + gummies especially, and my diet is quite unhealthy lmao i literally don't eat vegetables At All™ & i don't really eat meat that much too?? lmaoo please i can go for days without having a single proper meal & just survive on snacking on potato chips + soft drinks 💀 i am a very picky eater though so really me not finding food i like/am able to stomach is also really kind of my fault 🤡
while i really vibe with and love the dark academia aesthetic, i also do video/MOBA games, like i play games like Mobile Legends & all. I'm someone who knows most, if not all the lastest trends (like tiktok, memes etc) but i won't actively participate in them? i just kind of like to know things, like Knowledge is Power you know (I'm a Slytherin, in case you're wondering, though I've gotten Ravenclaw so often it's a close tie sometimes)
okay i feel like that's enough details about me? feels like I've told you nothing that's useful oh well LOL... I'd really love a ship for Criminal Minds and Marvel? if that's possible please? in case you missed it, i prefer men! (I'm a questioning bi, with a strong preference for men) for the hc prompt "what you do on your first date" or maybe "how you met + first impressions"?
thank you so much for being so kind and willing to do this ship requests thing!! I'm sure you're spending TONS of time and effort on this and aahhh i feel bad for typing so long paragraphs now (as you may have noticed i have a tendency to ramble on if not stopped because i am just really Socially Awkward ™ sometimes 💀 and have really bad (social) anxiety too) and i really think you're super amazing for doing this??? I'm so sorry if this took up too much of your time aaahhhhh thank you so so so much 🥺😭😭 really the biggest of congratulations to you for your 5.5k??? you really do deserve every single follower & i am SO insanely happy for you 🤩❤️
- 🌙🏒 anon
Don’t worry, you definitely provided enough information lmao.
And thank you for your kind words, I appreciate it.
I hope you like the ships I made for you
They are under the cut:
Criminal Minds:
I ship you with Hotch.
You get the age-gap here lol. He would be a bit hesitant due to the age gap at first, but he would get over it because he can not resist. He does not seem like the type of cuddles, and especially does not take part in PDA. But when you are alone he would love holding you and spooning, especially after a long day of work. Aaron would be attracted to your uniqueness as well as your intelligence and aesthetic, finding it to be very “you”.
How you met + his first impressions:
You met when you were transferred to the BAU as the new Forensic Pathologist.
Hotch thought you were very interesting when you first met and was definitely intrigued by you.
He thought you fit in fairly well and would get along with the others (which you do).
He appreciates a sarcastic sense of humor, so he would dig that as well.
Hotch could tell you had a form of anxiety and wold be patient around you when you first met so that you could open up to him at your own pace.
What you do on your first date:
He takes you to a hockey game.
He is not the sportiest person but he has had an interest in hockey for a while, sometimes watching it on tv.
When he learned that you liked it, he decided that this would be the perfect opportunity to invite you on a date as well as to see his first game.
After the game, you walked around town for a bit, getting some late night food and talking or a long time.
This allowed you to open up to him quite a bit and you grew more comfortable around him as well, which he is very happy about.
Best Friend:
Your best friend is JJ. She thinks you are really cool and unique and nice. She has the type of personality that is easy t get along with and open up too, so you bonded with her quicker than the others. I also feel like she is into hockey as well, so she appreciates your love for it as well.
-
Marvel:
I ship you with Sam.
I think Sam is a good fit for you. He is into sports, and digs your aesthetic. He is easy to get along with and very funny. He thinks your line of work is very interesting and loves to listen to you talk about it. Sam also really enjoys crime shows ans thrillers so he is always excited to meet someone who enjoys them as well.
How you met + his first impressions:
You met through Nat, who you had met through SHIELD years before.
You happened to be at the compound with Nat when Sam was there and she introduced you.
He immediately thought you were pretty and very interesting.
Sam could tell you were shy, but that did not stop him from flirting.
Though he also made some jokes and was easy going as to not scare you off.
He made sure to ask Nat about you once you left and managed to convince her to give him your contact info.
What you did on your first date:
He took you to the movies first, to watch the most recent crime thriller that came out.
After the movie you went to a nearby park and walked around, talking about the movie and other crime/horror related stuff.
You got food at a food truck and sat by the fountain together.
He was appalled when you told him that you didn’t eat that often (if came a part of your relationship later on that he would try to cook you meals that you’d like just so you WOULD EAT).
You ended up spending hours together, and it felt like no time at all.
So you were definitely up for another date with him, which he of course asked you about.
Best-Friend:
Natasha. She was the first one you met, and slowly introduced you to the others. She thought you were really cool when you first met and was surprised at how well you go along. That is sometimes hard for her to do, so once you became friends she never took that for granted. She and Sam would gang up on you when you weren’t eating btw.
xxaaron
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Who Killed Jason Shaw? Chapter 4: Ximena (RoD, Colt x MC)
Summary: Ximena joins Ellie in scoping the crime scene.
Rating: R (discussions of death)
Pairing: Colt x MC, RoD
Length: ~2200 words
Ellie walked downstairs to the smell of coffee and sound of grease splattering on the range. No nightmares, again; maybe she was turning the corner. She was so sick of Shaw haunting her dreams, taunting her, threatening the people she loved. Maybe his death had freed her too.
She didn’t even need to say hello before her dad turned at her footsteps, plate in his hand. “Time for breakfast with your old man?”
“Always.” She followed him into the dining room to dig into the Ellie Special. “So...how’s work going?”
He raised an eyebrow. “Fine. Busy.”
“Busy with anything in particular?”
“Are you fishing for information?” His eyes narrowed.
She hung her head, contrite. “I wanted to know about Shaw, of course.”
“No news. ME thinks they can have a cause-of-death before the weekend, probably Friday.” Her stomach dropped. Three days. Three days to investigate. “If one of those punks did this, they’re going down.”
“Dad, they didn’t do anything!”
“Really.” Her dad dropped his fork onto the table. “You expect me to believe that a crew of known criminals, thirsty for revenge, didn’t take the opportunity to take him out?”
“They didn’t do it, Dad.” She leaned forward to glare at him; he peered back. She met his eyes head on, not daring to blink.
“Ellie....Have you- You’ve been investigating them, haven’t you.” It wasn’t even a question, a pointed statement that he spit in her direction.
“I have.”
“I told you to stay away from them! What are you think-”
She pushed her plate away, appetite vanishing. “And do you know what I’m finding? A bunch of teenagers who were targeted by a corrupt LAPD, half of them in hid-.”
“The Kaneko kid’s twenty, not a teena-.”
“I know damn well how old Colt is!” She pushed her chair back, the screech of tile loud in the room, and stood, eyes narrowed venomously at her dad.
He stared right back. “Is that where you’ve been going when you’re not here?” She froze. “When you leave when I head out on shift? When you say you’re sleeping over Riya’s?”
Ellie swallowed.
“Dammit, Ellie, he’s a criminal.”
She blinked back the tears behind her eyes. “He didn’t do this.”
“Then who did?”
“Isn’t it your job to actually find out? And not rush to judgement?” She left the rest of her breakfast uneaten as she fled, feet slamming on the stairs, back up to her room.
~~~~~
After her dad had left and she had finished her brooding, she headed out, driving down roads she had only been down a few times before, stopping on a deserted side street. She made sure to lock it and walked the few blocks, passing liquor stores and check cashing services before seeing the dim tattoo parlor, sandwiched in between a wig shop and an abandoned storefront, iron bars rusting in the windows.
Unlike the surroundings, the parlor looked neat and clean as she ducked in, bell cheerfully ringing above her head. “Hello!”
“Hi, sweetie.” A familiar voice called from the back and, after a few seconds, its owner emerged with a wide smile from down the hallway. Ximena was a sight for sore eyes, a towering gentle giant clad in a black tank; it was almost like no time had passed at all and Ellie was still a naive high schooler getting in over her head.
“X.” She couldn’t stop the smile from spreading ear-to-ear as she was bundled into a signature hug. “How are you?”
“I’m great. You? How’s school?”
Ellie could feel the tension in her shoulders lessen. “Good. I’m good.”
“Are those....” Ximena took her palm, carefully rotating her hand in careful fingers. “Are those tatoos?”
“Oh my God, no.” Ellie laughed, pulling her hand back and stuffing it in her pocket. “Temporary. Riya wanted to experiment; I think she’s jealous of the feather you did on me.”
“Ok. Because this is my full-time gig until Colt has the shop is up and running; you know you need to get all your tats from me!”
“I would never cheat on you, I swear.”
“Good.” Ximena’s face dropped in concern. “You know, I talked to Toby. He told me your dad thinks one of us killed Shaw.”
“Yeah.” And, the tension was back, fear creeping into her spine. She wasn’t a naive high schooler after all; a year later, she was in too deep. Again. “X, I’m scared.”
Ximena turned to her, eyes questioning in the bright light of the shop. “Of what?”
“What if-” Ellie let her breath out slowly between clenched teeth. “What if one of the crew goes down for this?”
“Oh Ellie...” She swept Ellie into her arms again, hands running comforting circles down her shoulder blades. “Do you really think one of us did it?”
“No. No no no but...”
“But it’s not the first time the cops lied to you?”
Ellie’s face fell. “Yeah.” She looked out the window, neon lights casting an eerie tinge on the pavement. “Exactly.”
“Do you trust your dad?”
“I trust that he will investigate to the best of his ability.”
“Then I think you need to trust that it will all work out.”
Ellie sighed. “Easier said than done.”
“Have you seen everyone else?”
“Not yet. I saw Colt and Toby already. I’m going to see Mona tomorrow cuz I need to return her car and Logan after that.”
“You borrowed Mona’s car?”
“Yeah, my dad’s crappy-”
The ringing of the phone interrupted the her sentence and Ellie mouthed an apology, grabbing her phone. “Hey, Toby.”
“Ellie! I am amazing! I am the Aragon of the internet! The Khaleesi of dragoning! The Bruce Wayne of-”
“Huh?” At Ximena’s confusion, she put it on speaker. “Toby, I don’t know what you’re talking about. And X is here.”
“Hi, X! Listen listen listen both of you...I was able to get into Jason’s bank info!!!”
Damn. Toby could get a spot on the force if he kept this up. “What did you find?”
“Listen, the night he died-” She could hear Colt in the background, voice raised. “The night he died, he was at the Tattle Tale.
“What? What? time?”
“Late. Looks like a little after midnight.”
“Police report said the crash was right after that, before 1.”
“Maybe he was drunk? Maybe-” There was a scuffle, a few curses; Ellie grimaced.
When she put the receiver back to her head, it was a new voice on the line. “Hey, El.”
“Hi, Colt.”
“Listen, you know how expensive drinks are there. There’s no way he was drunk off one beer.”
“Ok...”
“I think he was meeting someone.”
“Are you playing detective again?” She rolled her eyes. “I wanted you to stay out of it.”
Colt continued. “But if we could find out who he was meeting, then we have a lead.”
“We?” She furrowed her brow. “But you’re not-”
“Ellie, this could be your break! Don’t you want to see what we can dig up at the bar?”
“Urgh. Ok, Detective Kaneko. I’ll let you know if I need backup, partner.” She hung up the phone with a sigh and hung her head; she couldn’t help but feel like she was involving the people she loved further and further into this debacle.
The excited voice in front of her added to the feeling. “We should go check it out!”
“What?” Ellie’s face fell as she turned to Ximena.
“Let’s go to The Tattle Tale! I can take lunch now and we can head over and look for clues!”
“X, this isn’t a game!” Her voice was harsh, unexpectedly so judging by the way Ximena recoiled. “I feel like everyone isn’t taking this seriously! Someone could go to jail!”
X put her hands up placatingly, then moved closer to rub Elle’s arm. “I know, sweetie, I know. But if no one in the crew did it, then we should try to prove their innocence as best we can.”
Ellie blinked and nodded, slowly. “Ok. Let’s go.”
~~~~~
It was deserted when they pulled into the parking lot of The Tattle Tale and Ellie clambered out of Ximena’s electric car.
“No lights in the parking lot.”
“What?” Ellie looked over at her before glancing around. There were no light poles here though, at midday, it didn’t much matter; the sun shone so blindingly overhead, Ellie needed to shield her eyes to see.
“Well, Toby said he was here at midnight, right? It would have been dark in this parking lot.”
Ellie stared at her, eyes wide.
“Oh come on.” X groaned at her. “It’s not the first time I’ve cased a joint.” She took a few steps away from the car, turning in slow circles to see. “It’s only open for dinner apparently, but he would have come out here to get in his car and then....” She trailed off, looking at the road. “Where did he crash?”
“The 405. North of here.”
“On ramp’s right there.” Ximena pointed, curve of the pavement rising above the ground only blocks away. “So he drove over there, got on the highway, and crashed?”
“I guess?”
Ximena surveyed the ground around them. “When was the crash?”
“Early Monday morning? 1am?”
“Probably nothing left here then. Let’s walk over to the highway.”
“X, we don’t need to do that.” Ellie edged back to the car. “We really don’t need to...”
But Ximena was already heading out of the parking lot, calling out over her shoulder, “What could it hurt?”
Ellie threw her hands in the air before following, breaking into a run to catch up to the long stride. “What in the world are we doing?”
“Humor me.”
“Is everyone trying to be a detective?”
Ximena smirked. “I will if it will keep us out of jail.”
“X...” Ellie took a deep breath. “I have to ask...”
“I didn’t kill Shaw.”
“Do you have an alibi?”
“Sunday night? I was working late at the shop, a complex sleeve on a regular client. It was the third session; he’d vouch for me.”
Ellie’s shoulders dropped in relief as they neared the overpass. One less person for her dad to target.
“Look over here!”
“What?” She followed X as she walked over to the concrete barrier, pale concrete supports of the overpass towering over them. “What is it?”
“Look at this junk!” X stared down. “it’s like everyone who drives by just throws their litter here. Don’t they care about the environment?”
Ellie looked down, skeptically; it was a mountain of trash, an ocean of paper and plastic bags, cascading in waves behind the concrete. “Yeah. Apparently everyone who drives by eats Big Macs.”
“Oh my God!” Ximena grabbed her arm.
“What?”
“Sorry, I...” X threw her hand to her mouth to cover the giggles. “I saw that black hair and thought it was a dead body. But it’s a wig.”
Ellie blinked.
“There’s lots of random stuff over here. Lots of trash, ew, needles. Clothes....oh my God, why would there be clothes here?” Ximena wrinked her nose. “Oh, look, an old stop sign! I can add this to the decor at the shop!” She leaned over, peering intently at the mess.
“How do we know what is pertinent? I feel like this is just junk.”
“I have no idea.”
Ellie raked her eyes over the side of the road before looking up at the overpass, traffic booming overhead, road above her vibrating with the weight of the tractor trailers whizzing by. “You know what is actually pertinent?” X raised an eyebrow. “The LAPD didn’t come by to pick up any of this stuff. It’s not evidence.”
“True...”
“It’s just trash, isn’t it?”
Ximena laughed. “One person’s trash is another person’s treasure.”
“You’re taking that stop sign, aren’t you?”
“...yes.”
Ellie couldn’t help but join her laughter. “You do you, X. You do you.”
~~~~~~
By the time they made their way back to Inglewood and Ellie said her goodbyes, a huge hug and promise to visit during summer vacation, it was late afternoon. She sat in her dad’s car for a while, windows open, thinking, watching the sights and sounds of the city from her driver’s seat when the phone rang.
“Hey...” She couldn’t hide the fondness from her voice.
“Hey, troublemaker.”
“How are you?”
“A little disappointed that you have been visiting everyone but me, but I’m good.”
She laughed. “Who have you been talking to?”
“Toby.” His cough was strained over the phone line. “He filled me in. Ellie, you have to know that I didn’t-”
“Stop.” She looked out the window, past the storefronts, barely seeing them. “We shouldn’t talk about this here.”
“Ok but Ellie...you know I have all the motive in the world. But it wasn’t me!”
“I know, Logan. I know.” She brought her hand to her face to gnaw on a fingernail. “I’ll come see you, we can talk in person.”
“Ok...” He sounded dejected. “Stop by the shop on Friday.”
“Will do.”
Once she hung up and was alone with her thoughts, her mind wandered, away from her investigation, away from the detective work, to the past, thinking about all that she had gone through with the crew, all Jason had taken from them, all they had taken back. When she shut her eyes, she could almost see flames licking the sky and had to blink before they consumed her too.
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
oof. okay so imma do the latest tea???
got out of shower to hear my mum talkin to Agnes spillin the tea abt their friend/coworker
the one with that Kid my mum wanted to have a playdate with or whatever the annoyingly studious and clearskinned halfasian lookin girl i really envied.
her mum has a live in boyfriend who is basically like...an alcoholic mental case rip god i hate alcohol and i hate people who drink it like i only do it so i hate myself more and die but like this guy basically playin with knives n guns in the house and the kid who is like 19 idk why im callin her kid is so Over it like apparently she hasn’t been coming home and like
basically me in 2016 era when my mum was too generous n Helpful lettin ppl back into our lives and our House so i spent christmas morning 5am walkin in the cold n watchin 3 films until it got dark and stuff like that
girl be actin homeless---mood
so it came to a head today so Agnes is spillin the tea n her husband in the bg(omg it weird hearin him rip he was my military hs instructor wild) n my mUM is so selfrighteous n mad like
‘blablahblah well rosalie is being dumb she should put her daughter first she being sick in the head it her Choice’
n im like eavesdroppin havin warflashbacks of the dumb hypocrisy she has DOne lmao
‘has she no thought like what if Tyler gets raped/sexually abused by that man she’d let her daughter be in that environment???’
i mean it wouldnt be fair of me to be like...eyemoji on this cos she technically doesn’t know? but 19 may 2018 never4get lmao
anyway so my mum’s like our room is for rent and it’ll be far cheaper they dont even have to pay rn!!!
cue me being like...um...Money...generosity...i dont...LIke
i was conflicted here like idk i met the girl like 3-5 times im envious of her work ethic n her better asian disposition than mine cos she obviously prettier but she has better prospects and that’d suck if her life be like that
but also??? like...life be like that it was like that to me like who saved me?????????????????????
um...no one
like why is that on me or US TO BE NICE n helpful im so tired like damn which is relevant to the next point anyway
cos earlier had a convo with my mum i was eyemojing healthcare profs i was like ‘pls stop bein on ye phone pls tell me info on ye opinion on respiratory therapists...what abt PA’
n deadass she be eyemojing me like STICK TO YOUR COURSE
n i was like...-ugly pleadin emoji eyes- n i was tryin to explain that i didn’t want to be so focused on one thing that if i decide this medical thing is what i want to pursue i’d need 1-2 years just for the PREREQS which is like 5 classes and 1000 clinical hours or minimum 6 month healthcare paid job. like if i decide i want to go to school for that i already have the Stuff and just Apply.
n she was like...you had your chance i bothered you to be a nurse a few years ago you were stubborn if you did as i said you’d be earning good money now but you wasted time
n i was like...oof i can’t say anything to that it’s tru. it real life tea it fax i wasted time n im old n im ruunnin out of time i hate myself alot i hate hate hate
and idk we got to talkin abt money n life cos she was like you have to find something you can learn to LOve
n i was like??? WHY I GOTTA SETTLE N FOOL MYSELF TO DO SO im super annoyed abt that mindset
cos the thing about a bloody Arts degree is there’s too fuckin many broad possibilities n they all aint even that good. like deadass if i was a STEM major ugh like if i was a Bio major prospects are so clear: forensics, research, premed,labtech. Meanwhile polsci for example: uhhh teacher? prelaw? politician? uhhh government work? n there’s like 111 different subdivisions of that n it’s like??? wat the fuck
deadass what am i gonna do with international security is that even gonna pay well like...the fuck do i know is it relevant ??? Doubts
n she was all like...PEOPLE JUST GOTTA DO WHAT THEY HAVE TO TO SURVIVE YOU GOTTA FIND YOURS N STICK WITH IT
n i was lowkey panique n frustrated cos i really REALLY hate being stuck in 1 ting n im like i HAD ACTING YOU SAID NO
n she was like pFF i wanted you to have something REAL cos if you dont make it in acting you’d be on the STREETS
n i was like...lmao lil did she know imma be on the streets next year smh this year actually
n she was like talkin abt the harsh reality of the workforce and how you gotta make do at how ppl treat you (patients) n how you might not even like your coworkers but you gotta deal with it because that’s what ppl do to survive
n she was talkin abt undeserving patients with no healthcare n i was like did you just hear yourself so you want them to die cos they dont got money and she was like
no??? why get hooked up in the ICU when you’re braindead wasting government money taxes we payed for you don’t understand cos you dont have a job and dont get your salary cut cos of taxes and these people come in acting like they got something to give when they yell at your face acting like they know what they’re talking about they act entitled when they have nothing homeless ppl getting money and illegal immigrants are selfish bringing their kids to be hurt here
n im like...theyre life is ...shitty what are you talkin about n she was like so? why dont they stay and make it better??? one of my very first patients asked me why i was in america and i said i come from a poor country and they said why didn’t you stay and try to make it better? and i couldn’t say anything cos u know what they were right why dont illegal immigrants do that??? n im like...
cos theyre literally...RUNNIN and they want ppl they care abt i.e. children to be far away from that as soon as possible bruh ye think imma wait for change deadass there a reason why we suffer duterte he actually get shit done??? we dont have to wait for change the same way ppl who speak nice n are polite do but is stuck with bureaucracy and lowkey bein corrupt deadass stay in ye lane
n she’s like well i hope you’re right im done bein an idealist im a realist now i believed in good i wanted to help the world now no more
n im like...no you’re not a realist, you’ve just been hangin out with a republican
and she gave me a sideeye
but deadass im ...scared like i really hate the empathy because when she was being serious n talkin n being honest abt things for once i started to unwillingly see things from her point of view i really felt it n i was scared i’ll be like that im scared she’s right
im scared i’ll end up Real n selfish like...i already am ? n bitter? like i care about so very few Personally and am willin to let others suffer to keep it safe n prioritised?
im scared.
like especially with racism all these years my mum’s been telling me it’s not that im racist just wait til you work with them they act so entitles and loud and make everything about race
n i almost told Her abt it earlier i skyped w her earlier we had a tea spillin moment about our ethnic relations bein racist but then idk we talked alot i guess the text got buried or unseen
like i said i was scared n didn’t get to unpack it like im scared because ive been livin with my roomate and like...ive been excusing it as a personality thing and that if it were anyone else different skin colour id still hate them just the same which i still maintain is true but like?
my RM is loud n she makes everything abt race like deadass me n my FM be just eating dinner and she passes by us and goes on a rant about harvard asians being a Blok to black ppl from getting There n im like...im tryna have dinner so i can get energy to deal with this stressful ass school
n she always talks like she knows what she’s talking about like ‘jewish ppl control the federal bank’ n im like...it 1am in the dark quiet of our shared room deadass i dont wanna tell the binch thats antisemitism cos she gonna be like im black how can i be racist smh
im!!! scared alright like i hate my roomate for proving my mum right when i try so hard to set things right like maybe that’s why i dont tell anyone about my situation other than Her. i never told my parents about the berkeley livin situation they already warn me enough to be careful n i just keep tellin them thats racist
i have so much........THOUGHTS n........DILEMMAS...n FEARS but like i just have this blog i cant trust anyone else to talk abt it n the only person i am willing to talk to abt it will be busy and im so ashamed abt these things but she was so sweet about givin me the heads up about her schedule
like i hated that i had to get an ugly ass haircut today cos she came back to me n we couldve talked so i guess rip she was complacent n did stuff cos she replied late from then on like that dumbass haircut was 15 minutes ugh. our talkin pattern today was like...dashed lines timereply wise? i asked her if she packed earlier (pre haircut)n she said yes but rip a few hours later she was like...I need to pack
wat is the truth rip
the tablet bein emo like...mood but my child rip.
my love be packin n spendin time with fam before leavin for london tomorrow
n even after that she doin...Stuff. rip.
which is ye know good for her rip.
i just hope she dont go iceskatin deadass one slip n she can crack her head open or break her neck or paralyse her spine like...??? why do humans wanna do dumb activities
like omg she admitted to me today she a serial jaywalker and WORSE with music n headphones like
binch thats why i didnt wanna enable you further by gettin ye airpods deadass bye
n she was like??? tryna equate it with my risky risk like ummm
mine is for science n validity
hers is just carelessness n chosin lazy convenience over idk...the responsibility of self vigilance like...
bruh ppl shouldnt promise someone 91 years if they be continuin to do dumb stuff consciously oof rip
but other than that like...im...really proud of this resolution she be undertakin officially on the 14th?
im nervous abt it cos i really want it for her too. i want her to get the proper sleep n i always hated her givin excuses like ‘IM FINE ON 4 HOURS OF SLEEP’ ‘I NAPPED 3 HOURS 38293820 HOURS AGO IM FINE I MADE UP FOR IT’ um...blokt. get proper sleep binch i love you tf???
prioritise work cos ye gonna regret not givin it yer all??? n ye payin for this???
what fun??? we capitalists now we want that money rip.
i see that shift you know rip i saw it comin a year ago.
that dont mean we republicans rip we still care about others n the inequality? but like i foresaw us getting acquainted with the harsh reality of the world n how difficult it is to get a job--which she experienced along the way.
n rip she wants many things bookmarkin them n honestly same rip
i want a stable warm home for this family n a shiny diamond to get disassociated by extra im a simple man
meanin im selfish n im ready to prioritise meanin im ready to make the choice for others to fall apart/behind if it means puttin This first rip
god pls dont make me a republican this so ugly
# 1 she’d hate me #2 i’d hate me
now im sad
im dead.
omg rip earlier too as she said goodbye i told her i loved her and she was like ‘i love you more’
DEADASS I WAS LIKE LMAO!!! girL i dont think you understand im literally Ready to put you and our possible future First like...im not messin around what skitrips with rich ppl what friends my love is potent n extreme n COncentrated like im sorry ik you feel love for me but you cant top This rip she not ready
like the um ‘partially wanna make my life’s work abt knowin what might hurt n kill ye so i can kill it first or blok it well’ kinda love
the ‘im already savin for at least HALF a first month deposit in an overpriced london in case you wanna settle down wit me Mayhaps n im not touching it for ANYTHING’ kinda love
the ‘im thinking of a winter home in the tropics so you suffer less n im plannin the floorplans already rip just in case’ kinda extraness
but anyways the gall of this cute lovely human rip ‘i love you more’ ummm try Again smh
bruh i love her too much i bet that’s scary for her rip it might be a Burden tbh she so young rip
meanwhile im old n ready to rot but like...
i wanna be mortal wit ye before i do
but ye know wat lads i saw myself in the mirror today like 5 times OOF. this meatform...keepin me...Humble.
bitter but like...humble
‘like of course sHe not ready not only is my personality like dis but also...my outward form how could she introduce me as a Spouse’
‘wow i look like that oof it good i remembered i am undeservin of full intense love like in the films n fanfiction they always between attractive ppl after all it only 1/2 it not Equal’
‘wow bruh ye really upset she spendin time n resources elsewhere when you be lookin like That? ye dont have much to offer bro take the L’
oof so that’s the personal tea i can think of?
had a meghan marke talk rip i can’t believe i was right??? i had twin vibes!!! but i was hoping for like a variety situation rip im worried a lil abt the whole birthin Late ting but she can afford the highest care rip it fine she rich.
my love was talkin abt how pretty MM was n i was like rip is she triggerin Her a lil rip worrirooni
rip speakin of babies like she was showin me this smol gummybear n im like same das me heart n she was like :( n i was like it only fits you
n she was like so no children then:(
n i was like!!! rip if it Ours of course that Counts n i was a lil shook like rip she said she didn’t want them Really so i always get guilty when i talk abt the future or realise i mentioned kids or carelessly name drop Hyaline n Benzion like...im dead rn just typin that like what if she read this big shame bro
but ye know what this is already long n she gonna be busy maybe that’s the key. TOo Much puts ppl OFF so ye mayhaps we sneaky ! ?
anyway i was tryin to get her thoughts on it rip but like she was all iDK ASK ME IN 13 Yrs n i was like...
sighemoji + sandemoji + resignedemoji
rip we talked FAaC a lil. cos she Dared!!! to liken me to her brother just cos i showed her my cheap youth boy shoes smh
At first i was super offended n disgusted but then i was like rip eyemoji if ye into that
then she was like ew nO
then i was like um ye already play the ‘daddy u like me young huh’ card
which is like idk is like technically? joking but it’s like that post ye know abt ppl bein ‘whether or not im actually jokin or flirtin depends if you into it’ but also like schrodingers racism like ‘it was a joke bro!!!’ but they actually bigots.
so it DIFFICULT for my brain to Confirm rip like...eyemoji what is the truth
but like??? im rip. willin. rip. to. rip. Try. rip.?
really i am rip. it Her. bruh. im only hopin she dont have a golden shower kink but. trust i...Will follow thru.
nO IM REMEMBERIN THE DOO DOO POST DESPAIR
rip anyway that whole thing reminded me of FAaC origins which was porn n then somehow sHe was like imagine if egggsy was a singer he’d sing like ‘age is just a number’ shit n i SPILLED THE TEA ABOUT A TING IN PT 3 im so weak sand
i miss the gays
i wanna give them justice n happiness but the 2027 excuse is rl nice for my ugly procrastination issues oof but i wish them well
add: rip had another talk with my mum i really wanted her to understand my thought process about wanting to get the prereqs for medtraining done beforehand
n she was like...I UNderstand but Normal people--
n i was like ‘IM NOT NORMAL I DONT KNOW HOW TO CHOOSE I HAVE NO IDENTITY’
n she’s just like SHOOKE n mad n clearly dont understand that im fukt up in the head ‘...IC AN’T BELIEVE YOU!!! iF YOU’RE ABNORMAL YOU WONT GET HIRED N YOU WONT HAVE A NICE JOB’
n im like...well i mean what can i say to that it’s not like it’s not tru rip
Big sand honestly.
it gonna be a long few days imma do my best to leave her alone she needs her time rip i love her so much rip sand
i feel like a dumb ugly dog god fljækadfkøad h8
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Episode 12 - "i'm baaaaaacckkkkk 😈" ~Jodi
An iconic moment happened today and I accidentally voted my closest ally out of the game. So Brayden got sent home and he is going to hate me when he finds out what happened. I did kind of get him out on accident I did not mean for Brayden to go I wanted Jay gone but I was blindsided by Colin and Josh and Elle AND AMY!!??]£[_[3 Omg. Im really upset that hes gone i miss him so much and I dont know how Im gonna go on without his brain. I dont trust Jay but Jared and Jay were both messaging me about how they already forgive me and stuff so thats a little crazy. I think it could be fake or they are just desperate for numbers. But I am with Josh and Amy and Colin and Elle now. I want to be with their numbers. I talked to all of them individually and they said they all were sorry for lying to me and causing me to get my friend out. I know its just a game but I just feel awful and so guilty right now. This has probably been the worst day of my life. He probably will never play another org with me again and hes the only reason i play orgs its boring without him. We are best friends increal life and I hope he can forgive me. I havent said anything to him because thats breaking the rules. But when he finds out im literally so scared of what he'll say to me. I pray he will forgive me I am literally so dumb af.
i'm baaaaaacckkkkk..................... 😈
This is literally worst case right now with jodi winning the play back like throughout the day she has won back her allies including anastasia since she swapped coins with her. Elle, colin, and josh all gave me all their coins to grab immunity before the other side to protect me but also it makes me a bigger target lol plus I gave elle some swapped to get the second thing the leftover because I THOUGHT it could give us an extra vote since that was ony menu but I was tired and drunk and it was a LOT of words and it was just the hunts which I knew didn't have any and I feel terrible bc 150 tokens and my actual alliance is going to be so mad when they realize THAT I HAVE THE LAST ONES and fucked up in suggesting it at all. First they were going for info. So now I think Jodi got all the other sides tokens and they are pooling for something idek. It's literally worst case like we were set to be up 5-2 or at least 4-3 and now it looks like it's 4-4 again hahaha neat. And it looks like colin is chatting with jodi again and they are making deals lol like tbh if she gets to the end I am voting for her to win I've said it many rounds. Turns out anastasia and brayden not only know each other irl they are besties so she mad mad. And Josh looks to be making deals and thinking about flipping so I am on borrowed time but tbh I never expected to make merge. I am glad I have immunity bc I physically couldn't do the challenge anywU here lol and I fucked that up too hahahaha. Good times all around. Like I want to tell them about my steal a vote to have official numbers but now they'd just be mad hahaha literally colin and I had every advantage except jared's idol now. Ahhhh idk what to do but it remains hilarious. I'm expecting Raffy to give my info in these in the market and that is no bueno ahahahaha. I am tempted to just give colin everything bc it's funny. Also jodi talked to me until 1am just trying to guilt me into being back with her I said I have to sleep goodnight like 5 times minimum. Her social game is so good that's why I think she has them all back with her and possibly josh. The problem is that I was keeping her close bc she had the info from others and from my game. I really never had a number one lol bc I was just vibing and I guess now colin is bc I flipped with him lol and I think it's hilarious he grew his army from 0 to 5 almost.
~
I have a suspicion colin and anastasia have actually been closely aligned this whole time and she knew everything all along. Colin sure loves giving out info haha. And apparently deals are happening all over, none of which I have made 😂
Jodi's backkkkk, wild wild wilddddd. The challenge went poorly, darn thats like 20 minutes wasted. We bought the refresh and there was nothing there 💔 that's 150 tokens wasted 😅. But! We got Amy immunity✨ and then Colin won the challenge so tbh everything's still going great lol. Wonder how we're gonna vote this round :/ we'll see how this goes! I've stopped worrying whether I'm going completely, it either happens or it doesn't 💖 xoxo, gossip girl (this is misleading I HAVE NOT SEEN THE SHOW i just know way too much about it because i have friends that did lol)
So after I voted my showmance Brayden out of the game I was left with an interesting situation. I had cried to Josh Colin and Amy that I was alone now and that my whole alliance hated me. With Jodi back in, I dont think they believe me. I literally flipped sides so I could be in their alliance because I didnt trust Jay and Jared and Jodi. But they literally lied to me about the vote and said it was nothing personal to me but they didnt tell me the plan because they wanted to see if I was lying. Which sucks for me because I then voted Brayden out :( Now that they know that im truthful they said they would work with me now. But all of them have been pretty inactive today. I talked to Amy the most and a little Colin and a little Josh. But I wasnt in their alliance. So I asked Amy if I could be added into an alliance chat since I was apperently in their alliance now. And she said sure. And they added me to a vote block. That is not an alliance group chat btw. So I was like wow thanks. But inside I was like screw this. So before this all happened, Jodi, Jay and Jared put me in a true alliance group chat. This morning I was ready to work with Colin and Josh but not anymore. Not after they put me in a vote block chat clearly saying to me that I am just a number to be used. They don't even need my vote either because Amy has an idol and Amy and Colin are safe. So I'm obviously voting with Jay, Jared, and Jodi. And I know they probably have a final three without me. They could call it something really cool like the three J's. But I called Jay and explained everything to him. (Also Jay forgave me for literally trying to get him out. He umderstands that its a game and all of my motives about not trusting him anymore.) He said he would be a hypocrite if he didnt forgive me because he told people my name in the chaos vote. So I actually think we are cool. And I told Jay that I am his number one. Which is true. He told me a lot of things about how Amy is actually really smart and stuff (I thought that girl was just a goat that I could take to the end with me) But her and colin are tight and both immune. This is bad. Basically we will go to rocks unless Elle flips to our side. Jay is giving his pitch to Elle tommarow. And maybe I will apologize to her correctly tomarow too. ALSO SPELLING THE WORD TOMARROW IS THE HARDEST THING IN MY LIFE. Also I took 62 minutes to complete a puzzle today so thats kind of emberassing. Anyways bye everyone this was so much fun to type omg.
Lol I woke up to a text from jodi asking if anyone was taking about votes yet and I said no because I went to sleep early bc I almost passed out from heat yesterday and had just woke up and she responded "ummmm lol...." 🤣🤣🤣 Sorry I sleep. She's in Colin's dms saying how I was legit her number one and now we can't even talk about votes. Like yeah girl we worked our asses off to get you out of the game sorry I'm not happy you are back. Also I'm still at disney world so I don't have the time for a million conversations. I know I'm going to be the Russell Hanz of the f3 /if/ I make it. So what's jury management lol like she was already pissed I voted her out and I plan to do it again. Anyway it looks like it's hilariously about to be a unanimous jay vote tonight but I am thinking we throw one vote somewhere else in case of an idol. But if jodi did get anastasia back we can't do that. Anyway lol I'm immune so whatever. Elle and Colin discussed like if it's on elle (which apparently jared proposed an alliance of 5 which included myself lol!) Then we could go to rocks and have only josh as a possibility and statistically he won't go if he is willing to go to rocks that it. All this to say I'm f7 and I want to keep my extra vote to f6 if possible so I can use the idol for fun at f5.
https://youtu.be/snpKevncc44
My quest has come to an end. I joined this game to be someone who could be there for Jodi. Jodi and I played survivor subrosa together and we both had rough experiences due to a player in the game who harassed jodi and tried to convince everyone I was misogynistic. As much as I love Survivor, I didn’t play this game to win. I played this game because Jodi told me she was playing it and I wanted to be her body guard. I wanted to be someone who could be there for her both as a number but also as an enforcer, anybody who ever dared to do anything to Jodi would’ve had to have dealt with me. Tonight, Amy and Colin have immunity, and either amy or josh or elle have an idol, so there’s no point in making any noise tonight and wasting Jared’s idol. None of those 4 trust me, and I doubt any of them like me. It is what it is, it’s best for Jodi, Jared, and Anastasia’s game to move forward without me, and it’s smart for Jared to keep his idol. Tonight, I will be voted out, and I am 100% at peace with it.
Since Elle, Josh, Amy and Colin pooled their tokens for immunity and advantage refresh, it means all the advantages and disadvantages are on our side. Plan is to send Elle a disadvantage and let Colin know because honestly it’s not hard to find out anyways. Jay doesn’t mind getting booted at some point cuz he wants to stand for me on the jury, but I don’t want to boot him right now. Obviously they won’t boot Elle, so I’m going to see if Jared will propose Anastasia. The thing right now is me/Jay/Anastasia/Jared also know next round is invisible. So I want Jay or Anastasia to send Colin and Amy disadvantages because if they’re paranoid seeing me Jared/Jay/Anastasia have advantages and they have disadvantages, they might be paranoid enough to play all their idols. I also wanted to keep Jay for this round as it’d be unanimous and something everyone can settle on. Jared wanted to do me/Jared/Josh/Amy/Colin as an alliance but has concerns about the 3 of them being in top 5 in the majority snd also Colin having his ideal f3. I told him my plan has the best shot at flushing all idols and hopefully we can either get Josh to flip or at least have Amy/Colin vulnerable at 5/6. Last thing is Jared is worried he’d be blindsided this round. I told him my plan and I said even if he wanted to flush his idol this round, next round should be ok if we all vote out Jay and the rest of them flush idols. Good to be back in the game! I genuinely believe Colin wants me as a shield at least for this round, and if I can make it through, I have a game to play.
Not everyone saying they only bought an advantage lol what about those other 70 tokens 👀👀👀 Like it must be jay unless someone is lying haha i am hoping people are just busy bc these answers I'm getting from Josh and Colin are concerning 😂 It looks like only elle and got disadvantages ☠️ I am really hoping not to be a target next round even though I know I will be haha. Next round is only 7 and I'd love to take out jodi and jared before they turn on me ☠️ especially since colin creeped on jodi's insta and it is possible they know each other from sports irl. And she was so concerned about all these pregame connections 😂 and here it was likely to deflect. Anyway I just swapped my position of having jodi do all the social work with having colin do all the social work knowing full well I'm not gonna get those end votes. I'm just trying to pull up my placement average now 😂. I hope everyone sees me as having no social game to take me to the end lol bc realistically I don't bc I don't care to put in that time this game. As I write from the pirates of the caribbean line 😂 So anyway if I'm not being lied to which I might be it looks like unanimous jay tonight but also I think the other group was talking split on jay like a 3-3-2 and I'm like wait the 2 wouldn't help. Elle are you okay with that? So I think they must have figured out I have stuff ☠️ I wonder what people REALLY bought haha okay bye
Jodi is back, not just Jodi Jodi, but player Jodi. Player Jodi thinks a LOT. When I was out, the entire time I was hoping somebody caught on that Amy flipped because they knew to put a stray vote on Colin to protect him from chaos idol, but they left Josh exposed. Why? Because Colin knew Amy was going to throw a vote on Josh. Also, Colin tied with me for closest ally and that set off an alarm too. Onto the next. So Colin won immunity, Amy bought immunity, but this could possibly be good because it means they are playing knowing they are not at risk themselves. Anastasia is voting with them this round, but she's actually working with us. She told us that the actual plan on that side is: "Jay, Jared, Jodi vote elle and Elle, Amy, Colin vote Jay and Josh and Anastasia vote Jodi" Anastasia will vote me here to continue "working" with them for the next vote. Essentially, they thought that Jay had the merge idol this whole time and Colin was weary about it, and that's why he got nervous about sending out Jay last round. That told me Colin did not have the merge idol. Josh came to me too about Jay having the merge idol. But the way they're splitting the votes this round shows me now that somebody has stepped forward to mention they have it (likely Elle) because if Jay idoled, Elle goes in this split vote plan. Therefore, somebody must've been like "ok let's just be safe and split the votes, I have the other idol". That's good and bad because now Colin has no merge idol paranoia, and they're also able to use it together. It also did confirm to me they've talked about it. Here's where things get tricky. Player Jodi is so tempted to run with it and do a 4-3-1 Josh-Jay-Jodi but it's so risky and could possibly destroy the long term social game, especially if they idol for Josh and Jay goes anyway (we are not idoling for him here). So instead, I'm going to use Jay's vote out to the best of my advantage. Hopefully flush an idol if possible, maybe a steal-a-vote, something. Knowing about next round being invisible is good info for us. Having this info is so key and usually I would think that immunity for a round is bigger than this but being able to plan ahead for a GAME-CHANGING twist is crucial here. My move here is to play the game through psychological distress. I have no advantages! Since they're out of tokens from buying immunity, me/Anastasia/Jared/Jay bought advantages for ourselves and also sent out disadvantages to Colin/Amy/Elle. Seeing that not only we have advantages but also them having disadvantages, they probably still feel like things will be ok because they'll just split votes or whatever and one of them needs to win immunity. But given this is an invisible round, I think Amy is honestly paranoid enough to just play her idol, hopefully Elle does too, and then between me and Jared, we'll idol for one of us. I also plan on bluffing an advantage coming back from Jury, and say something along the lines of having to survive one round before the advantage got activated. I'm going for the win, everyone, I know that if I get to the end with anybody, I have a solid shot at winning. I just need to get there and to do that, I must play an adaptable game – more than ever. PS I am holding onto Jared's idol right now. Power (temporary) feels amazing. Dw I'm giving it back....😈
this has been the most chill round in a while. which is really weird consider JODI IS BACK AND WE BLINDSIDED BRAYDEN LAST ROUND this round is turning out to be what I WANTED last round to be. everyone is talking with everyone, people are trying to disband the sides and all intermingle. it's really interesting how no one else was on board with this until after they lost majority. seems like people don't like playing from the bottom. weird huh now these bitches know how I felt >:( anyway. jodi is back. it's weird. she knows that amy flipped now and everyone is playing very carefully my ideal boot this round was either jay or josh, in that order. so when my gay ass WON IMMUNITY I immediately put out jay's name. we already have the numbers, but I also like said my piece to jodi and jared, this is yalls chance to prove to me that you're really with me and sides don't exist. the ball is in their court do i trust them? no. am I worried? no. i have immunity, the scariest thing rn is that I think Jay is voting Elle, and if Jared and Jodi are with him then that's scary, bc Jared has an idol. The ONLY people I would play my idol for is Amy and Elle, and Elle being in trouble means I might have to play my idol on her if Jay idols himself. We have enough to split, so I'm not worried, I just hope all goes according to plan. sorry my confessional is lame. its the weekend now so i have time uwu. I'll write more the next few days
So this whole token twist thing has really annoyed me. Because of me wanting to show my loyalty to my alliance, i gave away all my coins to Amy so that she could but immunity. And against my wishes, Elle wasted her coins on the “advantage” which turned out to be a dud. I wanted to get coins together to buy game info or better yet, trade coins with other people. But i was left with nothing, while all the people on the other side used their coins to buy advantages in the next immunity challenge making it even harder for me to secure my safety. Maybe this new 2 Gays and a Jared alliance might actually pan out but im tired of getting the short end of the stick with everything.
~~~
Edgic:
Power Rankings:
Anastasia: She is in the middle of the two sides. They both need her for the rest of this game before a side is terminated. She is the most powerful because she is in the middle.
Jodi: Has regained a lot of her footing in this game. Is being used as a shield by the people who voted her out. The decision to vote out Jay is questionable, but she still has a lot of power thanks to the knowledge Anastasia and Jared feed her.
Colin: The head of the opposing side. Seems to not know what is really going on with Anastasia. But his allies are willing to take him to the end which is good. Needs to avoid falling into a Jodi pitfall.
Amy: Her rat behavior has been exposed, but her allies are still willing to defend her. Second in command on the Colin side. She is being handed these immunities.
Jared: Jodi’s new #1. Will probably make it to the end of this game. However, he isn’t calling the shots and is in danger of being targeted as an “easy” vote or being called a goat at the end. Needs to start taking fate in his own hands.
Elle: Lost a lot of footing because of not telling Anastasia the truth. This move caused Anastasia to go back to Jodi’s side which will hurt in the coming round. Is the next target for the Jodi side.
Jay: Died on the sword for Jodi. I am confused why they didn’t just stack 4 votes somewhere else, but it is whatever. Has basically given up.
Josh: Left out of a lot of discussions. Is on the outside of his alliances and from the opposing side. Is the most in danger of getting targeted or being a casualty of an idol.
0 notes
Text
mobile masterlist!
LAST UPDATED- 8/25/17 (some of these are from my archive blog)
headcanon tag
inspiration tag
playlist tag
writing tag
commission info
Marvel
Bucky Barnes
drabbles
because of lucy
hold me close
can i kiss you?
Frank Castle
drabbles
the verge
making out
you don’t need to protect me + come home with me
doing something sweet
forehead kiss
are you wearing my clothes?
kiss me like you mean it
you just spilt coffee all over my pants and now trying to wipe it off in front of all these people
you’re my new neighbor and we’ve never spoken but you saw me shoveling snow all day and i guess it must be pretty obvious how cold i am because you brought me a jacket and hot cocoa
come back to bed kisses
this horrible umbrella won’t extend! oh shit i just hit you in the stomach/crotch! im so sorry!
oneshots
sweet treats
Jean Grey
drabbles
we’re the heads of the two rival gangs with just our guns, tactical knowledge and a hell of a lot of sexual tension
oneshots
sleepover
Logan Howlett
drabbles
it’s been seen fucking years and thats all you have to say?
Peter Maximoff
drabbles
why do i love you?
post break up kiss
Pietro Maximoff
oneshots
pumpkin carving
series
sick day (complete)
part i
part ii
Hank McCoy
drabbles
nervous
forehead kiss
having their hair washed by the other
museum
patching up a wound
pajama day
can we cuddle?
could you please stop saying “the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell”???? it’s fucking physics
i accidentally spilled hydrochloric acid on you and you had to take your shirt off
is that my shirt?
i tell my friends i come to the cafe you work at because they have the world’s greatest milkshakes but i love the little notes you leave me scrawled on napkins every time you take my order and you smile at me like the sun from across counter tops
pfft, i’m not jealous
I have something to say. Three words, eight letters. I…got food
firm kiss
oneshots
clueless
the many sleeping positions of hank mccoy and his wife
not real
series
caught in the act (complete)
part i
part ii (nsfw)
part iii (nsfw)
hiraeth (incomplete)
part i
Ororo Munroe
drabbles
experimenting with body paint
Matt Murdock
drabbles
it’s too early
pain in the ass
are you kidding me?
beautiful sounds
scar kisses
aggressive kiss
stomach kiss
first day
things you said with no space between us
things you said while holding my hand
lets keep this between the two of us
oneshots
nap time
are you staying?
don’t panic
candles, home and a messy room (nsfw)
the future
ring (nsfw)
series
crimson. (incomplete)
part i
Steve Rogers
oneshots
an artist’s hand
Alex Summers
drabbles
cuddling in a blanket fort
you’re beautiful, you know that?
giving each other presents
kissing me breaks the promise
is this your first time
take my jacket, it’s cold outside
the way i said i love you + muffled from the other side of the door
Alex Summers x Hank McCoy (Polya)
drabbles
holding hands and watching the world end
Scott Summers
drabbles
things you said after we fell in love
basorexia
don’t you dare tell me you love me
Kurt Wagner
drabbles
let’s skip dinner and go straight to dessert
it’s just a cut really
wearing each others clothes
spiderman kiss
oneshots
sleepy homecoming
colorful glass
Warren Worthington III
drabbles
jealousy
one song glory
things you said under the stars and in the grass
just make sure you’ve eaten + how about you make me?
i can’t fall in love with you i don’t want all the pain that comes with it
paintball
a little bit risky
kissing in front of the fireplace
halloween is better// let’s have hallowmas
let’s watch stupid christmas movies and get wasted
shoulder kiss
blush
acquainted
i don’t want you
heated kisses with gasps in between, hands tugging at clothes and exploring skin, bodies pressed close. giving in.
stomach kiss
does that line ever work?
patching a wound
im sorry, babe, im just not in the mood today, could we cuddle instead please
lazy morning kisses
DC
Tim Drake
drabbles
watching porn together (nsfw)
tell me how good this feels
who crawls through someones window at 1am for ice cream
Dick Grayson
drabbles
a hoarse whisper “kiss me” and licks their lips and says “please”
the way i said i love you + over and over again
first kiss
i hope you’re happy
calling each other by a pet name
sending steamy selfies
im sick of being the other girl
chest kisses
i waited for you but you never showed
i bought dick shaped popsicles
i think we might have gotten married
touching noses
moving around while kissing
i dont think i can do this anymore
you’re not the one
friends aren’t allowed to kiss one another
running their thumbs over each others lips
Roy Harper
drabbles
unbreakable kiss
Clark Kent
drabbles
someone straddling the other while they’re trying to read and slowly getting them to put the book away
Sara Lance
drabbles
a hoarse whisper “kiss me”
soulmate au
Ray Palmer
drabbles
you’re the most beautiful thing i’ve ever seen
office romance (drabble series) (part i) (part ii) (part iii)
you’re ridiculously comfortable + but i dont want to get up yet
Jaime Reyes
drabbles
i’d run my hands through your hair forever
you’ll stare god right in the eye and tell him that if loving her is a sin then you want no place in heaven
i remember practicing how to ask you out in the mirror
Leonard Snart
drabbles
bridge of nose kiss
Jason Todd
drabbles
im a good girl with high standards from my parents and youre the local criminal under house arrest but i like you au
the way i said i love you + when i am dead
making a sex tape (nsfw)
taking nude photos together (nsfw)
close your eyes and memorize each others faces with your fingers
i never loved you
i thought you didnt want me
things you said when no one else was around
snapping necks and cashing checks is what i do
things you said when you thought i was asleep
wanna dance?
series
eros (incomplete)
part i
part ii
part iii
Bruce Wayne
drabbles
mamihlapinatapei
the way i said i love you + with no space left between us + as we huddle together, the storm raging outside (nsfw)
the first time talking about the future together
oneshots
lull
damian wayne
oneshots
lull (parent!reader)
Wally West
drabbles
wake up kisses pressed gently to the column of A’s neck or the underside of B’s jaw
merman au
school teacher au
punks can get scared of thunder storms too
i have you shoved against the wall but now i can’t stop looking at your mouth
i’m going to need you to put on some underwear before you saying anything else
morning kisses
Wondertrev
oneshots
more time
Criminal Minds
Luke Alvez
oneshots
arrival.
Spencer Reid
drabbles
i need you to help me reach the top shelf
The Man From Uncle
Illya Kuryakin
drabbles
her gaze is too gentle. you will not be the one to tell her that not everything can be fixed with a smile
Star Trek
Jim Kirk
drabbles
things you said with my lips on your neck
things you said with no space between us
reunion kiss
i have a gigantic crush on you and you called me on the phone while i was masturbating but i picked up anyway
oneshots
incipient
#mobile masterlist#masterlist#bucky barnes x reader#frank castle x reader#jean grey x reader#logan howlett x reader#peter maximoff x reader#pietro maximoff x reader#hank mccoy x reader#ororo munroe x reader#matt murdock x reader#steve rogers x reader#alex summers x reader#scott summers x reader#kurt wagner x reader#warren worthington x reader#tim drake x reader#dick grayson x reader#roy harper x reader#clark kent x reader#sara lance x reader#ray palmer x reader#jaime reyes x reader#leonard snart x reader#jason todd x reader#bruce wayne x reader#wally west x reader#luke alvez x reader#spencer reid x reader#illya kuryakin x reader
30 notes
·
View notes
Text
Well it looks like I’m blogging again. Who knows who reads this, but I’m doing it because I realized yesterday that it comes in handy! I met some girls who asked advice on Cambodia and I couldn’t remember where I had stayed. Then I was like oh! I’ll check the old blog and was able to give them some good info from reading it. So here I am! This time - Philippines 2019 🤪
My bro Adam and I arrived in Manila after a LONG 14 hour haul from Vancouver. It was 4:30am and we cabbed straight to Malate Pensionne house. Our room was a little box - but at least it had AC. After sleeping for the morning we ventured outside. I think Adam was in culture shock at first since Manila is just another dirty busy Asian city - like Bangkok or Hanoi. He was so set on going to a gym and we searched and searched for one but kept ending up no where. Finally we decided to go for lunch instead. We had all you can eat Korean BBQ where you cook the food on the hot grill in front of you. It was really good, until I saw a giant black rat run across the floor. Haha - good thing AP2 had already gone back to the room when I saw it. After lunch I went for a cheap massage. It was unreal. Adam ended up finding a gym. We were both content, yet ready to leave the city.
The following day we had a flight to Busuanga (Coron!). It was a little delayed and just another travel day, but it was so nice to arrive on an island rather than being in the city. We caught a van to our hostel in Coron Town called “HUB Backpackers”. Adam’s first experience in a hostel. We had to walk past roosters to get up to our 8 person dorm. At least we arrived in time for free rum o’clock. We met a ton of cool people that night and booked a tour with everyone for the next day. Then that night rum o’clock turned into Reggae Bar till 1am. You can imagine how everyone felt the next morning...
We all managed to get to our tour on time the next day... and what a day it was! There were about 20 of us on the boat, and we went across to Coron Island. We saw the most beautiful rock formations and landscapes and crystal clear water. We hiked up to Kayangan Lake, swam in the Green Lagoon + Twin Lagoon. We snorkelled at Siete Picados and Coral Garden. Then ended our day with a few boat beers at Cyc beach. The tour was such a great way to see those beautiful places. When we got back to the hostel I was sooo exhausted. I booked diving for the following day and went straight to bed.
So I was up at 6:30am and at the dock by 6:45 to dive! There were 5 of us in total. We had the most perfectly calm water for our ride out to our first site. We did 3 wreck dives in total for the day. A number of Japanese WW2 ships were sunk by the Americans during the war, and now they are all snorkel and dive sites. Bad for the Japanese, lucky for me. It felt soooo good to be diving again. We got to swim around and inside the ships - it was so f*king cool. Spending the day out on the water and in the ocean gives life to my soul. We came back around 3:30pm, and I met up with Adam. We had a couple drinks at sunset and then went back to the HUB hostel for rum. We met a whole new crew of people and went for Thai dinner and back to Reggae Bar. Adam ended up ordering an entire bucket of rum, so you can guess how the night went!
Yesterday we had a good sleep in. Adam went to the gym in the morning and I went for breaky and did a bit of research on what to do for our last day on Coron. Welllll.... the activity I took us on turned out to be a big mistake!! We went down to the area where the boats leave for day trips and decided to rent kayaks. Well for starters Adam has never kayaked before and secondly the kayak was a little piece of floating plastic and thirdly the place I wanted to kayak to was pretty much 5km across an open bay. We got in (almost tipped before we even started), and headed straight out towards barracuda lake. We made it about 1/3 of the way across the open water when it started to rain and become choppy. AP2 and I were like screw this let’s go back.... it’s dangerous, far, and let’s face it - he was doing most of the paddling since my little arms aren’t strong. So we went back, looked at eachother and said “omg I hate kayaking”. That wasn’t a fair representation of how fun kayaking can be though. Anyway, we got back and I asked if we could have some sort of refund since we were supposed to be out for the day. After arguing with some people for a while and them not budging on giving us any money back we left and cut our losses. Instead we decided to go to Bali Beach and chill for an hour (a much better decision). After that we wanted a snack - actually soup (a terrible decision). We found a little authentic home restaurant and ordered what looked like was going to be soup. When it came out it was absolutely AWFUL. The funny thing was both me and Adam had one bite and were like “mm it’s good....”. But like we both straight up lied. The soup was like eating pig slop. That’s the new name of the soup. Pig slop. I also like to call it soup goop. The noodles were overdone and there was some kind of slime in there and like floating eggs. Again, we paid, cut our losses and got the heck out of there. We went to McDonald’s to get the soup goop flavour out of our mouths. We were both kinda beat from the day and chilled in the room. Adam did pick up a couple beers and brought them back to our place. I poured a large beer into two cups and literally one second later the bottle slipped out of my hand and smashed on the concrete floor. So much beer, and even more tiny shards of glass flew everywhere. Obviously I cleaned it up, but it wasn’t ideal. If I had to rate the worst experiences of the day in order it would be: 1. Pig slop soup. 2. Kayaking. 3. Glass bottle beer clean up. And if I could rate the best part of the day: babyyyyy puppies are our home stay 😍
Today we woke up early and went to the dock to get on our boat to El Nido! Thank god I’m an experienced sea sick i individual and decided to take 2 gravol before departure. That ride was CHOPPY. And some kid was puking right behind me. I swear if I didn’t take those pills I would have thrown up. I was definitely ready to. Anyways, 4 hours later we made it to El Nido :) We found a place to stay and took a tuk tuk to Las Cabañas beach. This beach is paradise. Soft white sand,blue water, a bucket of beers, and a happy heart. Cheers to El Nido!
AP xo
0 notes
Text
I probably should recap here because things got so hectic in japan I couldn't post everyday like I wanted to. Japan was amazing. I ended up getting pretty homesick by the end, a lot of us in particular missed Americas huge range of choices when it came to food and entertainment, but it still was a great experience. (I can't count the amount of times my friend Cameron and ordered dominos to the dorms against the head masters orders because we really needed our pizza). I went to multiple factories including Suzuki, Toyota, and Mitsubishi. I found a new respect for Toyota that I hadn't had before after our countless visits. There facilities were beautiful, they seemed to care for their manufacturing employees, and come on... seeing the inside of an automotive assembly line is just so cool! Our classes were very long. I was often late to Japanese (my 8:30am class) because of who I am by nature and had to repeatedly mutter sumimasen sumimasen sumimasen (sorry sorry sorry) as I fasted walked to my seat. At least I was usually to my Automotive lecture on time, although we spent most of it joking around with each other on chat (unless we found a particular subject interesting; for me it was crash safety and formula aerodynamics). My friend Kevin fell asleep every class and I have videos of us all trying so hard not to crack up as he snored. In Japan, sleeping on the job actually is a sign of hardwork and respect. That wasn't the case with Kevin though, he just couldn't keep up with the rest of us living out our 5am bedtime 8am morning routine. At nights we partied. Not all of us, but my close group of friends did. We usually hit night clubs (or karaoke) because bars weren't always open. If we missed the last train back at 1am though, we either stayed up until 5:15am for the next train, or walked 2 hours home. Or taxi, but taxi is incredibly expensive. On week two seven of us went to Tokyo by our own means, I booked us an Airbnb and we all crashed on 2.5 beds. Crashed may not be the right term though because I don't believe we ever slept when in Tokyo. Both nights we all stayed till the 6am train then whwn we got back we all laid on the beds laughing and taking. That's how our group really formed and that's how we really became best friends. The group contained five rowdey guys; Kevin, Tete, Armando, Szymon, and Cameron. And two girls, Lauren and me. All of us of completely different nationalities (Filipino, Nigerian, Mexican, Polish, Persian, Chinese, and me). This was something we all found to be pretty awesome, and it was thanks to this trip. Most of the time we'd eat meals from 7-11s or Lawsons (another store akin to 711) because food in Japan was expensive. The 711 was on our way back from classes and I don't think there was a single day we didn't stop there. We'd get back and work on homework, eat, and then meet up to hang out. I say we partied every night but that was really only weekends and days we had no Japanese class, as the automotive class started at 1:30. I loved my friends so much and all the good times we had there. The weeks went by super quick and I miss it a lot. Feel free to text me or email me if you want more info, if you are reading this Grandma!! Xxx Kellie
1 note
·
View note
Text
Should I Feel Like This?
Ive put off writing for a bit.. My brains all over the place Like I do things to myself unknowingly realizing what the out come is. Last week Tuesday October 9th I went out to shisha with a girl friend. Ended off dropping her off at her place mad early like always and decided I still had time to kill before going home. So messages hermit. He was in my area watching a movie at the theatre.. said he’d leave the theatre to come see me and “hang” but I was kinda 50/50 on that. So he said come pull up and i did. Got in my car and we drove over to another fucking city within the region to get his car.
A total of 15-20 minutes on the highway knowing I only have my roads permit. During the car ride we were talking like saying we could’ve slept sooner back then but we both kinda didn’t think of it. He wasn’t feeling me and I wasn’t feeling him we where just friends. Could’ve pulled a move on him back in 2017 summer when we went to a club together and danced but after that we just went our separate ways.
Get to his car and we drive off to another location that’s empty.
We start making out and I’m now self-conscious because I have bath breath....
Me make out and he’s so aggressive mad aggressive like I’ve never seen. Biting my neck and nipples kissing me hard all over my body. I go down to give him head and he’s trying to get me to deep throat something I’ve never done before!!!! And his dicks already huge as fuck too. I tell him I can’t and he still continues to push my head down hurting me I couldn’t breathe. I look up at him and say I give up tapping out and he’s like “you’re not a freak like you said you where” I gave up. I get on top and slowly put his dick in me and I already felt the pain! I move in motion by my self and start screaming scratching him. About maybe 4 minutes in he pulls me off throwing me to the side and takes the condom off. I look at him like did you come? And he’s like no. So I said why’d you stop??? He’s like I’m hurting you. I said no!!! Wth why it was good why’d you stop. As he’s still taking the condom off I just look at him confused. He takes it off and steps out side still hard. I’m like your still hard wth? He’s like I’m 24 I can turn it off basically... I get quite. I fix myself my make up a mess, black tears on my cheeks from the mascara.
Tryna wipe it off putting myself together before he comes back in the car. I get dressed and just sit there confused.
As we drove back to my car he’s like “I normally had sex with older women”.. yah that makes sense... those women know what their doing.. so then he says tbh your soft, I would’ve hurt you. I’m like oh wow okay. Thanks I guess. So I say yah I guess I normally have a fuck buddy and his isn’t big as yours. Yours probably would stretch me out... I leave the car telling him I’m gonna hit up my fuck buddy and fulfil the rest of my night.
Well that’s that. I’m apparently soft. Been texting has continually to show him I here because I felt this vibe he’s been dealing with some shit and he called and cleared that up with me maybe last weekend of last week. Come to Wednesday night I stay in and keep it simple. Has called me during the afternoon but I felt a bit sick and just woke up conversation felt weird.
Thursday night I go into work. Get off Friday morning and text has and mo”de the same message “good morning” Mo’de responds back has doesn’t. Saturday I get off at 12pm and sleep for a bit Around 10pm ish I get a call from has telling me he fixed his car and that things are kinda okay now. I’m still showing him support also giving him a positive image and advice. I still text mo’de kinda on and off at this point. While still texting my neighbour about linking up so he could eat me out tehehe. Sunday afternoon I go into work get off at 12am and get a call from has around 1am. Prior to that when I was driving home I felt all sad. Like with all of these guys. I felt sad that when they’d ask me what was up I’d say nothing when in reality so much was going on. That I’ve built walls around myself and no one even notices. I kinda wished they cared more but I can’t change how they want to treat me. Come to a conclusion that I’d have to end one of the situationship I have going on with either mo’de or has. It’s tough cause they both told me not to leave them. But there i go Tryna make something that’s nothing into something. Even tryna plan things together outside of our regular day to day lives. So I said I’ll give it time and know my worth with these guys. So I get a call around 1am from has.. and I ignore it. I then get a follow up text message maybe 20 mins later stating that he has love and respect for me but he can’t see this going anywhere. Told me that he doesnt want to hurt my feelings and I can have a good life.
I read that messages and cried. I cried but laughed at myself. I wrote back saying I was trying but I get it hope he finds happiness and a peace in the near by future. I could’ve wished hell on him but I just couldn’t. I’m not like that. It’s all a whatever to me. I place myself in these situations but at least this time I was making use of it. Getting dicked down by other niggahs while claiming I was innocent and pure. Ha I’m living in my karma can’t blame myself. But I get it, felt that disconnection too. I’m not crying my eyes out like he probably thinks I am. I’m unfazed at this point I get it we didn’t connect I seen it with my eyes but it would’ve been fun to have fun with him. But it’s all good. That happened Sunday night. Monday came and I kept re-reading the text message. Like okay it was real.
Tuesday I went out shisha and more shisha posted snaps and insta video seen he still follows me confused like you think I’m gonna unfollow you nah niggah you’re gonna watch me post my snaps and vids see me all unfazed and Shit like you thought wrong bitch.
Wednesday night I stay in. Talked to mo’de via text like always talking about he wants to come to mtl with me on my bday weekend. Uhm I’ll think about it. Thursday night aka now at work We still talking told him my bro’s getting married to that girl he said he knew wanting to know any info on her. Then tonight he hits me up with that “when can I see you 🙄” asked why the face said it’s been too long. Yah you made it that why duh. But told him I’m mostly working weekends and that I chose that shift cause I don’t do shit on weekends. He replied back like our schedules don’t match but blah blah blah.
I don’t even see myself with him either. If anything he was the first on my list to cut off. Physically I’m not attracted to him, mentally we don’t connect he’s an air head and doesn’t show me any love that I need. Last we went out was the night before I went to Miami July.. then I last seen him was when we linked up last week of August.. then the whole shisha spot incident.... he messaged me like a week and a half later tryna see me. But it’s just so bad. I gave up on trying with him. He hurts me like the efforts I put in I don’t want that kinda hurt again.
If we link up we link up, but I’m not gonna settle for a car convo unless I’m cutting him off. And as stupid as I may sound... winters just around the corner. I might want his company but we’ll see what happens.
So i’m apparently soft, unattractive and not worthy of seeing.
0 notes
Text
AYYYY I’m going to share my mental health story
I was watching a thing on youtube about someone who was sharing their story, and I decided I wanted to do that too. This may contain triggers, but if you do decide to read it, read it all the way through.
You should know that I’ve only ever told a few people about this, I’ve never told any of my friends off the internet, or my parents, and it should be noted that I HAVE NOT TALKED TO NOR AM I A PROFESSIONAL. I SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN PROFESSIONAL HELP AND IF YOU ARE CAN RELATE TO ANY OF THIS STUFF GET HELP, TRUST ME I WISH I HAD BUT THERE WERE OTHER CIRCUMSTANCES BEYOND MY CONTROL AND A LOT THAT I KNOW NOW THAT I DIDN’T KNOW THEN. SERIOUSLY, IT CAN’T HURT SO JUST DO IT.
But seriously, it’s taken me a long time to get to a point where I can share this, and even now it’s only on a somewhat anonymous post where no one I actually know will ever find it.
Now that I’m done yelling at you, I can start.
Sooo... the first thing that should be known is that one of my family members is borderline (actually maybe not even borderline, they may have crossed that line but I don’t know) abusive, not physically, but mentally. I’ve been told I’m worthless, ugly, useless, never going to be happy, my whole life. I’m overweight, and always have been. When I was 9 this person tried to convince me to basically not eat anything, and I almost bought their argument until they told me I would never be happy if I was fat.
When I was little I would write short cute stories, and as far as I remember they weren’t bad, and when I let this person read them, they would always laugh. I thought they were laughing at the stories. Turns out they were laughing at my spelling mistakes. I found out when I asked them to read my essay for school. They laughed at it. It wasn’t funny. I told them I wanted to be an author when I grew up. They told me I could never be an author because I was to fat. Thats when I stopped worrying about my weight. That statement, that I couldn’t write because I was fat, was just so BS that even I could tell it wasn’t true.
But the thing is: if someone tells you these things, every few days, for years, you start to wonder if they’re right. Especially if this is an authority figure. I promised myself then that I was going to prove them wrong. I still am working on that promise. I write as much as I want, and I do what makes me happy, and the day after I can consider myself happy is the day I start a diet. Is it physically healthy? No. But as I’ve grown I realized that even before I knew what mental health was, I was putting it first. Its more important to be happy than it is to be happy.
Anyway thats that part of the basic info. The other part is that in elementary school I had a best friend. We became friends in first grade, and by 4th we were nearly inseparable. Except that apparently she wanted nothing to do with me. I don’t know what happened. She won’t tell me. Did I say something or do something? I still don’t know. All I know is that one day we were fine and the next day on the playground she told me not to talk to her again.
I don’t know, maybe its just my kind of personality, but that completely destroyed me. Like its one thing if you don’t like me because of something, but to go from being my best friend to nothing with no explanation... I still don’t know what I did, and that still bothers me. Now I’ve guessed that it was probably peer pressure since all the other girls in our class came to me 3 days later and told me they also wanted nothing to do with me. But I didn’t really care about them, they were only my friends because of her, but I do remember sitting on the playground when they told me all of they're little speech and I just remember crying and asking why. I said why so many times. They wouldn’t answer. After that I was left with one guy who also didn’t understand what was going on, and he pretty much saved my life the first time. He made it a goal to make sure I smiled every day. And I did because of him, but I also started into depression and social anxiety.
About a month after the end of our friendship, this girl comes back and thinks we can go back to being best friends, and I was like Bitch excuse you? But also I couldn’t talk to her. I didn’t know it then, but now its completely obvious. I had anxiety attacks when I tried to talk to her. 2 times I actually blacked out. I don’t think i fainted, but I remember being terrified when one second I was trying to talk to her, and the next thing I know I’m in a completely different place, but I have no memory of what happened, just a sense that time had passed. Its fucking terrifying, especially if you don’t know what’s happening.
But this girl, she doesn’t give up. We wrote notes back and forth for 2 years. She always insisted that she did want to be friends again and she was sorry for what happened. She never told me why though, and thats most of why it took 2 years. When I finally was able to talk to her again we became pretty close friends again. By then I had made friends with another girl, and the boy I had been friends with kind of headed towards hanging out with other guys. It was middle school, girls had cooties again. This other girl deserves a name because she literally saved me. But since I don’t have her permission, we’ll just call her Ash. Ash, “Her” and I were friends for a while, and it was great. That year I also got invited to a leadership conference in Washington DC for a week (which, side note, I think I had a nightmare that they were trying to sue me over the events that happened that I will now describe, so I’m going to be very careful about not mentioning the name. Don’t sue me, none of this is my fault.) So that spring I got on a plane with my aunt and went to WA DC. The conference thing was great. I got to see lots of places and we went all over and learned lots. The food was not great, so I didn’t really eat. I thought it was ok to skip eating so much since I was overweight. I WAS WRONG DO NOT EVER THINK THAT’S OK YOUR BODY THINKS ITS STARVING AND GOES INTO SURVIVAL MODE AND ACTUALLY WON’T LET YOU LOOSE ANY WEIGHT AND MAKES YOUR BRAIN NOT WORK RIGHT AND SUCH. This was just one of the factors. Another was my roommates. We were assigned rooms in groups of 4 with other kids from around the country. I should mention that this trip was kind of expensive, and I was lucky to raise the money to go, but almost everyone else there was rich. I got roomed with 2 rich... I’m just going to say it. Bitches. Fuck them. I’m getting ahead of myself. The other girl was like eh whatever I’m going to sleep. The 2 girls decided that instead of like just sleeping or whatever, it’d be fun to make my life living hell for the week. Now I’d been bullied at my school. I mean the best example is all the girls from the previous story shunning me. But the thing about my school is that they don’t do the bullying directly to the face. They might whisper behind your back, but they would never say it to your face. These girls were not that kind. They stole my stuff, they wouldn’t leave me alone, they kept watching tv so loud I couldn’t sleep till midnight or 1AM. Thats on top of jet lag. They bullied me into not asking for a room change. Finally on the Thursday of that week, I locked myself in the bathroom with my phone. I was crying and hyperventilating, I couldn’t move but I couldn’t stand to stay still. It was terrible.
That was the point. We were in a room on the 8th floor. There was a window. I wanted to end it all. I didn’t want to go home. I just wanted to stop existing forever.
But there was this tiny voice in my head begging me to try to get help. I had 2 friends, The girl and Ash, and Ash was kind of known for not being the most reliable person and little more happy go lucky, not really the kind of person that would help in this kind of a situation. This girl was reliable right? Seriously, what happened before was just so out of character for her, theres no way she would leave me literally on the edge. Right?
I called her. She answered. I was mid anxiety attack and couldn’t really make words, i was just sort of crying into the phone. She didn’t even listen or ask me if I was ok. She yelled at me for calling her so late at night, and she hung up. I called again. I texted her. I told her I needed to talk to her, I told her what was happening. I told her I wanted to say goodbye.
I decided to call Ash, just as a last resort. And I will tell you one thing about Ash. She has a slytherin exterior and persona, but on the inside she is a hufflepuff. She is the most loyal friend I’ve ever had, and she was ready to kill whoever hurt me. She let me talk to her mom, and she got grounded for a month for being on her phone at night, but she also didn’t care about those things. She cussed out the girls in my room for me. She stayed on the phone with me till morning to make sure I got the rest of the night to sleep. She made sure I was ok.
And like I wasn’t. I’m still not that ok. I’m still crying even thinking about it. And the other girl? She still gives me anxiety attacks. I avoid her at all costs. Shes not a bad person, in fact I we have a lot of common interests. There was a reason we were such good friends. Now she works in my bank, and I have to go talk to her sometimes, and I always leave the bank on the verge of an anxiety attack.
And Ash and I aren’t really friends anymore we kind of went into different branches in high school, but I will always be thankful for her. She always has a place in my heart.
I want to say more about how all this has effected me but honestly I’m exhausted rn. What happened made me who I am, but I think I’d like to change that bit if I could. Its ok to have regrets. Its ok to have problems. Take care of them. Take care of yourself. You will be ok, even if it doesn’t seem like it now, and it will take time. You won’t be ok next week, or next month, or maybe even next year. Maybe not 10 years from now. But eventually one day you’ll think back and realized that hey, you’re ok. Its ok. And then you can let it go. And thats ok. Everythings ok in the end. I love you. Its late and night. I’m going to sleep now. Seriously, I love you, especially if you think no one else does. I would love to talk to anyone who I can, but tbh find a professional, I’m just a young adult who doesn’t know anything and I tend to mother hen ppl with problems and thats not good for my choice to put my happiness first, and also I don’t consistently get tumblr messages, but there are plenty of free emergency health lines, some even that you can text to, so google one up and get help. Seriously, its worth finding help. Your life is worth it. I promise.
Sorry for spelling mistakes there are a lot of red squiggly lines but idc rn
0 notes
Text
Allow's Cure Some Health issue.
No one intends to cope with Acne, or even extra surely- no one wishes to manage the aftermath from Acne. Yes, Regarding Face Skin Treatment uses cutting-edge equipment for laser device capillary extraction which delivers remarkable outcomes. http://neobisnuitedieta.info/ that do not need to undertake the encounter of having these scars could not potentially comprehend why my skin is the way it is actually. As a little one, I was actually considered a monster. A great deal of youngsters won't accept that they are actually experiencing stress, and some could also attempt to conceal an injury, mentions the National Facility for Athletics Protection. The other pieces you pair with your sports jackets and jeans will go a long way to guaranteeing your guise works. The Nikon D500 does sporting activity the most recent image processor chip to make up for the lack of megapixels. The website gives headlines concerning the occupation's very most vivid characters and also highly effective organizations, as well as authentic discourse on the most recent legal advancements. Concerning Blogging site - LawInSport is a leading on the web worldwide sporting activities regulation publication offering expert commentary and evaluation on the latest concerns and also lawful advancements on the planet from sporting activity. Then you place your socks on, as well as fasten the lower clips to them, adjusting the clasps up until the tshirt is secured yet certainly not stretched. About Blog - Zac Wolf Photography is actually a boston-based New England, East Shoreline & Place Wedding event Freelance photographer for merely the absolute most fantastic few on earth. I have actually been actually utilizing the suggested eczema creams as well as silver iodine recommended to me by medical center, however am right now enabled to stop utilizing them and come back to ordinary skin treatment. All the individuals in the research, along with affiliated disorders including AIDS and upsetting brain personal injury (and many mores), had remained in wound care procedure for a minimum of three months without any improvement. Concerning Blogging site - Founded in 2007, RTC has increased off a one-man university baseball blogging site to an updates and study portal showcasing over 50 authors coming from shore to shoreline. Commotion noe its own an award gaining product however i also using JM's Jojoba & Ginseng Shedding Face Solution. Incorporate these pointers into your lifestyle as well as you just might be able to maintain your skin layer appearing new and also youthful. Richard Deitsch, a writer for Sports Illustrated, enjoys the sports media landscape like a hawk, stating on the reporting the remainder people eat without question. If you use a laundry cloth to clean your face, wash this regularly, alongside the towel you use to dry your face. Some of the major traits that I had actually found out was actually practically how a lot of just what's accompanying adrenal exhaustion is way of living similar, somewhat diet regimen relevant. About Blog - Premier Sport Psychological science is committed to offering professional athletes as well as staffs along with an innovative strategy to strengthening intellectual performance and psychological strength. Physical fitness style, diabetic issues expert, and kind 1 diabetic Christel Oerum presents you how to have a active and well-balanced lifestyle with diabetic issues! Is actually about embracing a healthy and balanced way of living that looks after your body system in addition to your skin. SkinReading truly aids you to inform your customers regarding their skin layer and also effective ways to adequately look after that. Craig S. Keener reveals the use of the several forms of nike in the biblical book from Discovery: 'Conquering' (specifically a sports or armed forces photo of conquest or even success) below includes standing firm when faced with disagreement and problems; this is the only thing that the Lord calls for to secure best victory" (Rev. All the all-natural, anti-oxidant and natural abundant foods as well as giving up the processed food has actually kept her beautiful and also exactly how! Dr. Hess is devoted to providing the best medical care in a patient-friendly setting. Bachelors had a significant impact on the quick increase of sporting activities in United States lifestyle. We really want an. esthetician that is actually used with Renée Rouleau Skin layer Care to possess a long, prosperous profession, and understanding their individuality off the outset is actually important to finding out if they are going to prosper in our company. Beneficial Oil Cleanser: Cleansing with an oil is a fantastic means in order to get additional from your face wash, moisture-wise, at the very least. You should simply be actually washing your skin 2 times a time at the most, in the morning as well as in the evening. I MUST wash my face I cannot not, also evenings when I'm inebriated and also sleep without doing my evening routine, as quickly as I get up (don't care concerning the moment. 1am ... 4am.) I clean the face. Cosmedicine's Triple-P and Night Task creams contain wealthy products of active substances, including the first-rate antioxidants, to jointly support both day and also protect as well as night. And also by this content have to choose the application, the OS has done a 95% correct task from performing this for you, so you simply move on without ever actively deciding on the application.
Eco-Beautiful: The Ultimate Overview of Natural Beauty as well as Well-being it's full of info on active ingredients to look for as well as those to stay clear of, as well as products, programs and dishes. Additionally, you might be curious about an article I have actually written at some time back on why you should not vapor your skin frequently specifically if you have sensitive or completely dry skin layer. For volleyball very upset James (6), that truly is actually only a game; he cheers when our experts score, acquires delighted at free kicks and also fines, asks lots from great inquiries, but succeed draw or even drop comes away along with the exact same large smile on his face at having actually been actually to the suit. Thinksport SPF FIFTY+ Sun block is unbelievably wearable for a sporting activities sunscreen-so considerably to make sure that I may even utilize this as an everyday sun screen lotion. When you copulate an unclean skin and eye region, you risk of irritation, blocking your pores, as well as early getting older from the eye region. Along with the many thousands who relate to her blog post each day, pop superstar Katy Perry and also interior decoration guru Jonathan Adler both named COCOCOZY being one from their preferred interior design blogs in InStyle journal. Helpful for getting rid of a whole face of make-up, I often provide my skin a fast laundry before, rub completely dry and after that use the chilly lotion as a deep-seated conditioning treatment and also the final defense against obstinate makeup. That suggests that sun screen lotion, than every other skin treatment product offered over-the-counter, possesses the greatest capacity to stop furrows and untimely skin layer getting older. I certainly never handled that, made love my makeup on for Ten Years directly, never washed it away from the downpour, and also certainly never made use of any type of skin layer care products on it. That was awesome as well as certainly I know, this was likewise totally unethical. Whenever our team made use of to groan concerning him for life angling off to possess a button, he would certainly point out that sport misbehaved for you, and also a sportsman devoted even more vacation work with injuries in comparison to he carried out possessing a button in the smoking place on board (passionately known as the 'Leper Swarm'). While many people still are without access to care, there's mounting documentation that many people also acquire a lot of treatment. The web site reveals tales coming from their trips, suggestions as well as assistance for other travellers, in addition to digital photography guidance, and great images off the street. In twenty years, if the abundant have identified a brilliant method to lessen poverty, their taxes will lose.
0 notes
Text
Week 5.5 of 2018 😢 / BKK DAY 1 🍗
Quick update on the past 3 days before I can get into bkk updates hehehe I’m calling this week 5.5 😂
Workload started piling up on Monday, but I expected it although I didn’t think it would get that insane.
Alexandra food village’s dry ban mian with J and Qien for dinner that day 🙃 Had a side of 10 gyozas cos jer said it was nice. Gyozas were good, just that 3 is my max hahaha Oh yes, I have to mention that the auntie making my teh ice was so precise that she was using a weighing machine to weigh every single ingredient she added into the drink 😂😂 The drink turned out nice so I guess it was worth her effort? lololol
Took a bus then train back, and while we were on the train, J suddenly said “wah so fast potong pasir already!” Literally 1sec later the train announcement came “Next station, clarke quay” LOLOLOL WE LAUGHED UNTIL 😂😂😂
Skipped chiro on tues cos I couldn’t afford to leave work half an hour earlier. Met J for dinner and dk how we decided on 4 fingers haha maybe the only fried chicken I willingly eat 👌🏻 I’ll try the spicy ones next time hehe
Quickly went home to get started on packing. I only managed clothes before I turned in for the night but it was a good call to start a day early cos Wed was SHIT 😭
Told J that I was nervous for the meeting on Wed and I was right to be nervous. It went pretty badly and the amount of work to be done after the meeting........ Couldn’t help but feel like my bkk trip came at a wrong time.
Had a quick lunch of dry ban mian at vivo (I see a pattern too lolol) before we headed back to office, where I spent the rest of the work day going through an insane number of files FML
As if I didn’t have enough on my plate already, my period decided to come a couple days early 😭😭😭 I was praying it would come after the trip. Oh well, I am at least grateful it didn’t come halfway ya? Popped a panadol before I headed back to files I CRY. MY DOG LIFE
Did what I could and left office with my boss after 11 hours of the grind. Through shit like this, I am eternally grateful for a nice boss ✨
Wanted to cry when I realised there was no food at home but I sucked it up and called my mum to takeaway some food for me. I had to wait maybe an hour but I took the opportunity to chill a little cos I could feel myself being very panicky. Mum came back with oyster omelette, which I enjoyed with KUWTK 😌
And then it was time to pack......... I didn’t leave much time for myself evidently, so I only got to bed around 1am? Holy, that’s 3 hours of packing wtf ray how????????
BKK DAY 1 🇹🇭
Tore myself out of bed at 6:15 in the morning cos I still had last minute packing to do plus this was the first time I had to call a cab to the airport myself 😅 Usually my parents fetch me there or they’re the ones calling a cab when we travel tgt haha so I was understandably a little panicky cos there were so many unknowns!!!!
Didn’t have to worry myself that much cos I got a cab easily (fare was $30 though wtfff) and reached the airport with a lot of time to spare.
Checked in and this was our first stop.... We made plans to check out the YSL outlet here, to see if the wallet I liked was cheaper since duty free and all?
WE BOUGHT IT 😍😍😍 I was 90% decided that I really wanted the wallet already so when it was $60 cheaper than retail stores, I pretty much handed my card over immediately hahahaha I am so happy ✨✨✨ J says she wants to get it for me as a christmas cum birthday gift but we’ll see!
Yakun for breakfast, where they forced us to get large cups of drinks so obv I couldn’t finish??? Oh yes, the two evian bottles were from the YSL sales assistant haha went back to return a bottle afterwards cos it was unopened.
While waiting for J ✨
我的头发很乱
Boarded! HAHA I LUV THE HOOD omg 😂😂😂 So kewt and I even managed some sleep on the plane, which is gr8 considering the flight’s only 2 hours ✈️
我爱我的鞋子👟 Asked my mum to look at my new shoes and she said “you bought new shoes again???? Ray, when you go bkk, you just eat, don’t buy clothes and shoes ok. Just eat” LOLOL I replied with “good joke mum”
Landed, settled sim card and hopped on a cab to our hotel! The ride took ages due to the jam, and J scared me cos she told me there was no meter in the cab??? She still said “hope we don’t have to fight about the fare later” 😂😂 I also quickly went to check my past dayre post and gathered that the fare should be roughly 600baht. Turns out meter was on all the while haha and the driver only charged us 500 phew no fight phew phew
We booked berkeley again cos it was a pretty good deal and we’re so familiar with the hotel/it’s location. Paid for late check out on monday as well since our flight’s only at 6pm. Spent a long time in our room waiting for my phone to charge 🙄 But I took the opp to quickly unpack everything.
Before we left the hotel!
J was starving by then so we stopped by mr shake at central world. My milk tea was pretty good but the calamansi drink she wanted wasn’t in stock so she ended up with plum green tea which wasn’t nice 😅
Continued with our walk to siam! I love how familiar we are with everything, such that we rmb how to walk everywhere without the need to google map 👌🏻👌🏻 J was asking me if I knew where inter was, and I said “ya just go to siam square, cut through the tiny stores then exit, cross the pedestrian crossing with the police and turn left” WHERE DID THIS INFO COME FROM????? IDK
First food stop: Inter! I think this is J’s and my favourite restaurant in bkk. The food is v good and inexpensive, what more can you ask for? Got the water mimosa again but asked for it to be less spicy cos my dayre reminded me that it was too spicy for us the last time we were here haha tried a new fried fish which turned out pretty good surprisingly! Erm the curry beef was a mistake on my part haha I wanted to order red curry with beef but idk why it became this dish instead 😂
Curry was great but there were a lot of fatty beef parts so overall, a no go for us 🙅🏻♀️
STAR OF THE SHOW ⭐️ Couldn’t go to inter without ordering our fav wings!!!!! Still as good as before omg Bill came up to less than $25 I LUV BKK
Shopped around siam square and exercised tremendous self control. Only bought myself a phone cover for $6 hehe proud proud Continued wandering around the area then stopped by watsons and bath and body works to get our bkk essentials - large packet of tissue and hand sanitizer LOLOL
📍Hokkaido Cheese Toast @ Siam Square Before we came to bkk, I was telling J that the cheese toast originated from here so we should eat the one here haha forgot all about it until we changed upon it at siam! Best things is there wasn’t a queue at all hehe and they had the strawberry & matcha flavours that I think aren’t out yet in singapore?
But we’re basic af, so we just got an original to share amongst the both of us! Smart decision to share cos it got a bit too much towards the end. Dk how much it is in singapore but it’s 69baht here!
🧀🧀🧀 Verdict: I quite liked it! The bread was nicely toasted and the cheese was really stretchy, not too heavy tasting. There was this creamy liquid filling inside which I didn’t like, and which is why I said it got too much towards the end haha might not eat this again, but glad I tried.
Got a bit thirsty while walking around and went in search of their koi outlet. Found it and was so pleasantly surprised that they had small sizes!!! How cute is this small green tea macchiato omg the lady helps to poke the straw in and she makes sure the straw goes through the O in KOI hahahaha i luv it they are so cute
Aesthetics 101 with this random cafe on the middle of the mall 🌿 There’s really nothing much in siam leh. I think I said this last year already hahaha plus the malls are quite confusing so we end up at the same place after walking for ages. Decided to head back to our hotel after a bit and J suggested we take a train from siam to chit lom, which is just a stop.
Not smart cos the train station was a bit confusing to manoeuvre around plus we hit peak hour I think. And it was only after we alighted at chit lom did we realise that our hotel’s in the middle between siam and chit lom haha so it would have been smarter to just walk from siam. Oh well, you learn new things everyday!
Was supposed to have after you but we were craving salty food so we headed to the hotel to rest before dinner at talad neon.
Took us a while to get out of the room haha talad neon’s super super near to our hotel which is great cos my poor feet 😅 J got a coconut drink and we walked around a bit. I love talad neon leh!!! But I can understand when people say there’s nothing much to do here. I just like it for its cleanliness, close proximity to our hotel and there’re still a decent number of shops 👌🏻
Took such a nice photo of J ✨✨ Dinner at hubba shrimps, essentially a cheaper version of dancing crab haha vibes were...... thai disco-ish 😂😂
Hello it’s me 😌
📍Hubba Shrimps @ Talad Neon Got the one with mixed seafood, which contained shrimps, two different kinds of mussels, squid, clams, corn and potatoes. Asked for the sauce to be less spicy but less spicy in thailand doesn’t mean much lolol the sauce was v tasty though!! But the seafood was okay only, not very fresh/tasty. Overall a decent meal for less than 500 baht
💕 Continued walking around for a bit before heading back to our hotel to walk around the night market downstairs. Got myself only 2 pieces of clothing that day 😌
Yet another wrap dress from talad neon for 250 baht. As expected, it’s too big on me but I’ll make it work by looping the waist bands around my waist to give the dress some shape. It’s a little sheer as well so will have to put on an inner lining. Otherwise, I do like the cut and prints 🌾
This mustard top from the night market below our hotel for 150baht. I hesitated a little cos bkk tops are usually too huge for me, but...
it’s a tie back so you can adjust it to be smaller! I’ve been meaning to get smth like this from taobao, like it’s literally been sitting in my cart for ages haha
0 notes