#it´s a human reaction and I think a big part of his depression came from him thinking in terms of failure or not failure when in reality

[marvelstars]

Obi-Wan's Reaction to Anakin's Redemption (LEGENDS)

"Vader grabbed the Emperor forcing the deathly lighting to fall away from Luke and crashed down upon both Sith Lords(himself and the Emperor). Vader carried his master across the room and hurled him down into the reactor shaft a moment later the Emperor exploded into a great release of dark energy.

Had Obi-Wan´s spirit not witnessed Vader´s actions he never would have believed. Vader, the same monster that Obi-Wan had left to die on Mustafar had sacrificed himself to save his Son and succedenly Obi-Wan realized where he had failed for unlike Luke Obi-Wan had not only believed that Anakin was completely consumed by the darkside but actually refused to believe that any goodness could have remained within Vader and by refusing to allow that possibility he had condemned not only his friend and former apprentice but his own capacity for hope.

Fortunately, ObiWan thought, Luke´s unwavering faith in his father´s inner goodness had proved to be an stronger force than the power of the darkside. Obi.-Wan realized that he had never been ready to forgive Anakin and that Anakin would never be free until he did.

[psycopath06]

Secretary Part 2: Volturi Kings x Neutral!Reader

A/n: (f/s) = favorite scent, (2/f/s) = 2nd favorite scent, (3/f/s) = 3rd favorite scent. The parentheses next to the quotes are the translation to any words that are in Italian.

Tags: @peachymelon69 @schroedingershund

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I opened my eyes and looked around. I felt like death, was I dead? Did they kill me in my sleep? If I'm dead than this must be hell because it still looks like my room in the castle. Seriously death? Couldn't you give me a break?

   I sighed and got up to look around, but as I passed the mirror I turned around immediately to look at myself. I was a lot paler than I remember, I looked like I just walked off a runway. The worst part was I had those damn red eyes that the vampires had. Am I really dead or did they turn me?

  I turned to my door at the sound of footsteps suddenly appearing outside my door. Then Aro walked in with Marcus and Caius at his sides.

   "You changed me?!" I screamed beyond frustrated with them at this point.

   "Yes, that was what we told you would happened if you took the job." Aro said matter-of-factly.

   "You never kept your word to that before with the other secretaries! Why am I the one you changed?!" I screeched angrily at him. I couldn't get a nice peaceful death, now I can't die. These vampires suck!

   "That's simple Caro, you just haven't figured it out yet." (Dear) Aro said playfully, like this was all one big game to him.

   "Why I oughta" I growled and lunged at him, but was stopped by Caius pulling me into his chest. Before I could think of a way to curse him out, I stopped as I caught a whiff of Caius. Why did he suddenly smell like (f/s)? It was a very nice scent and it was making my brain fuzzy.

   Before I could stop myself, I was giggling and giving a genuine smile. I snuggled into Caius' chest enjoying his scent.

   "There we go. Take it easy, Tesoro." (Treasure) Caius whispered sweetly to me. I honestly didn't want to let go of him. Besides he smelled amazing, this was a side I never saw of Caius. Actually, the kings were all acting strange since last night.

   Marcus was being playful and less depressing, Aro showed the most genuine concern I have ever seen him give, and Caius was mostly quiet last night, but now he was cuddling with me. What the hell was happening?

   I tried to breathe in more of Caius' scent but something else caught my interest. Marcus smelled like (2/f/s) and Aro smelled like (3/f/s). What was happening to me?

   "What's going on?" I finally asked, after collecting my thoughts. Aro stretched out his hand so I put mine in his on instinct. He then wrapped both his hands around my hand. Marcus had moved closer and was messing with my hair. I leaned into the new touch, enjoying the attention from the both of them.

   Aro chuckled at my thoughts from when I woke up. "You can now feel the mating bound Caro. Now you know why your no longer our secretary. I'm shocked it took you this long to feel anything."

   I looked at him confused and he answered my unspoken question. "We vampires have a bond with a human or another vampire which is called the mating bond. It's very similar to a human soul mate. It's something Caius, Marcus, and I have shared for centuries." Aro now held an actual sweet smile on his face at that thought. "When you came to be our secretary, Marcus saw our bond was also connected to you but throughout the entire week that you worked for us, you never showed interest, simply trying to stay alive and not anger us. That would be normal if you only had one mate but you have all three of us."

   Caius and Marcus started to purr at Aro mentioning the bond, clearly they enjoyed the thought of a mate. I had even started to purr because of them.

   Aro continued, "The more mates a human has, the more of a need to be near those mates the human will have. Vampires have a more intense reaction to having a mate then humans do. That is why you went from trying to kill me to cuddling Caius." Aro stated as he watched how I was reacting to Marcus and Caius. "We originally thought it was because Caius was being harsh on you."

   That reminded me, "Why were you such an asshole to me while I was the secretary?" I asked Caius, while looking up at him.

   "The lower gaurds have less tolerance to humans." He stated before Marcus interrupted him.

   "That's putting it lightly, Carissimo." (Dearest) Marcus mumbled into my ear. This caused the hairs on the back of my neck to stand up. I knew it wasn't Marcus' intent of scarring me but to tell me that I was walking on extremely thin ice with the lower gaurd around because I existed scared me.

   Caius lightly growled at him for freaking me out, but he continued with what he was saying. "If you made even one mistake infront of them, they would have either killed you or choked you out while promising to kill you." He said, while trying to soothe my nerves by scenting my neck.

   "Why not tell the gaurds about me then?" I asked, annoyed that they wouldn't want to keep me safe because I was their human mate. I moved away from them and sat on my bed, I didn't want them touching me anymore

   "It was too much of a risk if the entire gaurd knew. Some would want to use your life in order to get a higher statues in the gaurd or to get revenge on us for killing someone they knew that they deemed innocent, but we killed." Marcus gently replied. I was surprised they weren't trying to force me to be affectionate towards them.

   "The elite guard are aware of you, they kept watch over you incase a lower gaurd decided to mess with you." Aro tried to ease my annoyance of them.

   I finally dropped it and went over to the window to help me process everything. This was a lot when all I wanted was a job to get myself out of my financial hole.

   As I looked out at the garden below my room I caught sight of sparkles in my peripheral vision. I moved my arm around in the light finding it fascinating that my skin was now extremely sparkly.

   I heard my mates chuckle, next thing I knew I had Marcus next me telling me about how our venom causes us to sparkle instead of combusting into flames. It was odd to see the kings sparkling like glitter bombs and being caring instead of depressed, creepy, and angry all the time. Maybe being a vampire wasn't so bad if I had them by my side.

[carewyncromwell]

Maybe part of the reason JC shies away from utilizing Duncan more is, not only does he know too much WHICH HE DOES, but any development into his character would just be too dark for the game. Anything past his "im dead lol" jokes just gets... depressing. This is a kid who was murdered in a very painful way with no hope for the future. Everyone he loves will die and leave him alone forever. Is this level dark stuff allowed in a kids game? Part 1

Whew! Okay, so first off, wow! Very interesting sidequest idea for Duncan. Thank you so much for sharing it with me! 

But to your first point, at the very top...this is kind of one of my biggest problems with Jam City and its writing. “Is this level dark stuff allowed in a kids game?” And my counterpoint would be it should be. 

Look -- I work at a Disney theme park. I work with kids every single day. And from my experience, I can say with certainty that kids are a helluva lot more intelligent and reasonable than a lot of adults give them credit for. They know that terrible things happen in the world, and they know that the world isn’t always fair. And there would be ways to use Duncan’s character where he doesn’t have to be doomed to watch everyone he grows to care about fade away forever -- who says he couldn’t find some measure of peace through his friendship with MC and Jacob and be able to finally pass on into the next life knowing he really did make an impact? That’s what I plan to do in my headcanon version of events. 

And for that matter, this game is not played by very young children  -- it’s geared for 12+, as in the audience that Harry Potter as a franchise was always geared toward. And I’m sorry, but for all of J.K.’s faults as a writer, she never doubted that young people could handle dark subject matter like murder, bigotry, etc. without being coddled. We’ve already watched MC’s friends get Imperiused and tortured. We’ve already watched a character we got emotionally invested in at the very beginning of the game get brutally murdered before our very eyes. Yes, maybe it was upsetting, but that’s the POINT. Stories shouldn’t just be fluffy and inconsequential all the time. I can’t help but feel like the vast majority of the sidequests as of late have suffered because they have so little of substance or stakes behind them, even compared to what came previously -- and honestly, even the main storyline since mid-year 6 has petered out to nothing because R is busy doing things like dropping off random magical creatures from around the globe in Britain and apparently putting memory potions in haircare products rather than doing things a real Cabal would do. It doesn’t feel like some grand plan or conspiracy, or even like some well-planned distractions while R does more evil things on the side, since we don’t get any evidence R is actually USING those things to do anything more serious, like getting access to classified Ministry intelligence or killing people. (Instead they steal one Portkey, and the Ministry doesn’t even bother to find out where it’s Charmed to go, since that might be a pretty big hint about their true intentions. I mean, there’s a bloody CHARM to turn things into Portkeys, you don’t need to steal specific objects to turn them into a Portkey.) It feels like some rabble-rousers causing trouble for the government, a la Carmen Sandiego stealing random pieces of world history for the thrill of it, not a group trying to destroy or overthrow anything or terrorize people to get their way. Young Harry Potter fans could digest the Death Eaters back in the day -- they could handle R being more of a real threat, just as they could accept other types of dark subject matter. They could handle discussion of PTSD post-Redacted -- Harry goes through some of that in Order of the Phoenix. They could handle a discussion about bigotry and prejudice -- that’s one of the central themes of the original Potter books. They could handle both Duncan and Jacob being sort of stuck out of time after dying prematurely and coming back as a ghost and being stuck in a portrait for so many years -- that same sort of thing happens to Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers in the MCU, and plenty of young adults watch the MCU. 

I understand doing anything with Duncan could be “depressing” if not properly balanced out, but you know, being sad isn’t a crime. It’s part of being human. I frankly think getting a real emotional reaction for a character you created should be a welcome thing, rather than a half-hearted shrug like the vast majority of these recent sidequests have prompted out of me. It means that people actually care about the characters you’ve created -- go figure. 

As well -- I don’t think Duncan “knows too much,” personally. I know this game is called Hogwarts Mystery, but it can’t be a real mystery if we don’t have tools that could allow us to start putting the big picture together ourselves. Again, for all of her faults, Rowling understood this as a writer. We could put together, with all the info we got about Snape throughout the books, that him killing Dumbledore wasn’t because he was truly evil all along. We could put together that Rita Skeeter was an illegal Animagus, like we learned the Marauders were a book prior. We could put together that Harry was a Horcrux, based on what we learned about Horcruxes and Harry’s connection with Voldemort. And maybe having someone who could help us get a better picture of what R wants would help us better define these antagonists we’re facing and develop them into a real threat, instead of this vague red-robed shadow that honestly just seems to do random things for the hell of it rather than as part of some grand plan. I understand not understanding someone in small doses can make them intimidating, but it also makes them less fleshed-out and developed as characters and makes it harder for us to care about whether they get what they want or not. As they say, a hero is only as good as one’s villain. 

[the-ghost-king]

time for me to share a good™️ headcanon: will and nico love to steal each other’s clothes but their massive size difference makes it so obvious that they’re doing it. nico’s shirts are almost croptops on will and will’s sweaters are practically a dress on nico bc will is like 6’2 and nico’s like 5’5

Anon! Anon! Yes, you. You get it.

I don’t really know what you wanted as a response to this but I felt inspired for the first time in some 10 months so I gifted you a one shot below the “read more”. I’ll also upload it to Ao3 with a link in the notes...

Anyhow Anon, I hope you enjoy it! I got a little off topic but reflective fluff is always good!

If you would have asked Will what he wanted out of life as a kid you probably would have gotten an answer that was something like “a chance to actually go and live life as it was meant to be” or maybe “to be happy, pretty, and stupid”. 

He didn’t dare to hope for more, demigods didn’t live long lives, and being involved in a major battle at thirteen didn’t do wonders in regards to establishing confidence in your survival. As for the “pretty and stupid” part of his answer, it wasn’t that Will had ever hated being smart, he just hated the disconnect different intelligence levels caused in peer groups and society; being smart was hard, sure for school purposes it was nice, but that intelligence means you’re constantly thinking and so often so much of the world seems so dull and petty. Will had been lucky enough to be blessed with decent looks, moving through the world was made easy in at least that regard, but he wished he could live without thinking so much because so often he could only see so much awful in the world. 

Thirteen year old Will wouldn’t have dared hope for anything more, he wouldn’t have dared hope for anything else more than a decade or so of normal life beyond camp and a chance at an easy life for those few years. When fourteen year old Will got a depression diagnosis he wouldn’t say he was surprised, he would have been annoyed but he hadn’t really felt much of anything in years. (”Atypical depression” The doctor had said, “likely clinical”)  A few different types of anti-depressants and a few months of therapy things started feeling okay, better at least. Fifteen came and went, he tried to go off the pills and didn’t quite get there, but his dose got lowered which Will supposed was nice. 

In the months of early 16, Nico di Angelo stumbles into his life; exhausted and melting under the pressure of the universe, he makes friends with death. It isn’t much, but Will remembers him from when they were kids back before any major fights. He remembers hearing about Nico running off and he felt bad for not having made a continued effort to get to know him. He felt bad when he left after the Battle of Manhattan too, they’d prepped bodies for their departure together and Will had gotten hung up in the infirmary (he had been one of the last Apollo campers and he was the only one with medical training). In some ways, Will supposed he was making up for those lost years when he didn’t have time to befriend Nico as he would have liked, it made him feel like he was at least trying.

In the beginning things were undeniably rocky, Nico was constantly hooked to machines just so Will could guarantee he wouldn’t die overnight. Even on Nico’s first night in the infirmary he had struggles with sleep, the bed wasn’t comfortable enough and after trying a large variety of options Will had hauled Nico and all of his equipment out to the porch on the back of the infirmary and they slept there for those three days (which turned into two weeks), wrapped up in jackets and in a pile of blankets beneath camp’s fall skies.

Within a few months, they fell in love. 

Okay listen, people can call Will ridiculous all they want- but love at first sight is real and he experienced it. He didn’t know it but the day he met Nico and looked into the dark browns of his eyes, he thought something about how his eyes looked like ash from the fireplace at Mama’s house, or how they looked like the soil that his windowsill plants grew from. If you would have asked Will what he thought of Nico the very first time they’d met, he would have told you something about how his eyes were “big, dark, and round like a baby cow”. What Will really meant is that Nico reminded him of the family ranch house he grew up in, he meant he looked like home. 

At the time Will just hadn’t known that was what love felt like, but when he figured it out one day teaching Nico how to play Hold ‘em on the back porch of the infirmary with a light breeze and setting sun as they settles down for bed; he knew one thing, he didn’t want anything more than to make Nico happy and he hoped that he could be a part of that more than anything.

It took a little longer for Nico to come around, he had his own demons to battle. Internalized homophobia, even in small doses, is a real downer to say the least, let alone when you’re fighting demons you’ve manifested for some 15 years. The biggest struggle however, was probably in all honesty the fact that Nico was so goddamned oblivious. After spending years alone with limited human contact at best, and having spent so many years desperately wanting Percy to notice him, and being met with negative reactions, Nico didn’t know what love looked like anymore. How had he been supposed to know he was in love with Will?

There was a lot of subtle back and forth, would the other even be interested in a guy? It ended one day with an unplanned kiss followed by a declaration. Will called it the best mistake he ever made, neither of them really thought it was a mistake.

It was days like today that only proved that.

Will had woken up to Nico’s face on a pillow next to him. He’d fallen asleep with his hair pulled back in a ponytail, and some of his smaller hairs had fallen loose in the night and now framed his peaceful face. The first rays of golden sunlight fell through accidentally left open curtains, and Will reached out to brush a stray piece of dark hair and place it behind Nico’s ear. 

He woke up to a morning more beautiful than he would have ever hoped for at 13, and he would always be glad for that. He would always be grateful for how far he had come in not quite a decade. At just twenty-two he was 4 years into medical school, and three years married to Nico and he truly believed he was one of the happiest men in the world simply because he made Nico happy.

In time, Nico too would wake up. 

First with a huff, and then a grumbling noise of annoyance as he rubbed his face with his arm as though trying to block out light before half-asleep Nico seemed to accept his fate and wake up fully. 

“Good morning”

“How long have you been up?”

“Awhile”

Nico made a knowledgeable humming sound, perhaps he was just acknowledging Will’s response or perhaps he was saying ‘of course’. 

A few kisses, a short conversation, and a couple of “I love you”’s later, they got out of bed.

Nico's was wearing Will's high school hoodie that was a bit too short on Will anymore like it was a dress on him. The hoodie went down to Nico’s knees, he's got his own black shorts on because Will's just fall off unless he ties them really really tight. He's got black socks pulled up almost to his knees, there’s a little gap between the end of Nico’s shorts and the start of his socks. The hoodie goes down an inch or two past his short pockets, and he goes outside to grab the mail with a pair of unlaced combat boots on his feet. He's got his skull ring on his middle finger of his right hand, and his left hand holds a simple wedding band which glint in the light as he opens the front door. His hair is pulled up into a messy ponytail, some of it is up some of it is down, there's tons of flyaway hairs which frame his face since he hasn’t fixed it sense getting out of bed.

Call it a cliché, but Nico looks like Heaven personified without even trying. 

Sure, everyone looks nice in a suit or a dress, but how many people can roll out of bed without doing their hair wearing a decade old hoodie and look like they belong in a magazine spread?

Will is wearing one of Nico's looser shirts, on Nico it comes down past his hips and a little onto his thighs, on Will is he so much as lifts his arms a centimeter it reveals his hip bones. He doesn’t really mind, he kind of likes it to be entirely honest. Will can remember being just a few inches shorter than he is now and fitting fairly comfortably in Nico’s clothes at the time, they had never worried whose clothes they grabbed back then. Nico had finished his growth spirt and Will had thought he was done only two inches taller, it didn’t matter whose clothes were whose because everything fit well enough.

That wasn't quite the case now, Nico had stayed at his casual 5"5 while Will had shot up and extra six inches to 6"2 and ruined his own chances of sharing clothes. Such as right now he was sure he was wearing his own sweats, because he had specifically had to get a pair last night despite Nico's having been more accessible. Anytime he's actually managed to get a pair of Nico's pants comfortably on in the last few years, result in him wearing pants that are more like compression shorts or capris than pants.

Will was just happy he could wear some of Nico's larger shirts and hoodies still, the fact that Nico preferred to sleep in lots of clothes and typically baggy clothes meant Will had some options when it came to wearing his husbands stuff.

Will has also managed to steal a pair of Nico's socks, they're a taller pair on Nico (he buys winter wear so often because he's cold always) but on Will they gather a little awkwardly around his ankle. Will doesn't usually wear socks but they had gone to bed without the heat on and apparently the cold had set in over night and you could definitely feel it on their apartment floors.

The clothes would be a bit stretched out from him, it was something Will can remember being worried about after his second growth spurt, but Nico doesn't mind, He's assured Will of this time and time again, he says something about "aesthetic" and "alternative". Will doesn't really know, he's never cared much for fashion but he'll take Nico's word on it. 

The truth, although it's something Nico would only admit in their bed late at night when it was so dark you could barely see his face, and arguably a little drunk as well, was that he actually enjoyed the way the clothes fit better after Will wore them. He found some sort of comfort in the way the shoulders of his shirts would be just a little too wide on him, it was one of those small acts of love, it wasn't one Will entirely understood but both of them got their own sort of enjoyment out of Will stretching out Nico's sleeping clothes some so they went with it.

Will turns his attention from Nico walking out the door to the coffee pot on the countertop.

Will doesn't like coffee much, he likes the social aspect of getting a cup more. Nico had introduced him to it, he’d been drinking it for years by the time they’d left camp. It reminded him of home and he grew to like it for such reasons, and although Nico would consume just about anything with enough caffeine in it Will needed creamer to enjoy coffee to any amount. 

They were both honestly probably more tea people, but they never seemed to remember to buy any. Will will try to remember to write it down on the grocery list later, but Nico has walked back into the kitchen, climbed up on the counter next to Will and now he is looking at him; and Nico is always a distraction that's worthy of taking, Will will definitely forget to write down tea for their grocery list and the week will start over with more coffee in the house and no tea.

Nico’s fingers grip the countertop and he swings his legs a little bit back and forth from where he sits on the black granite, his white gold rings set against the counter in contrast. Will's worn out blue hoodie looks grey with age, the little printed letters are cracked and peeling on the back of it, his last name can still be read in white though. 

Will knows the cliché about your lover wearing your name is often unhealthy and overly possessive, but he likes seeing Nico with his name because it feels like a gift. It’s like he’s given Nico a part of himself and Nico accepted it with pride, and Will loves that, he loves him and Nico being little pieces of each other.

Nico is smiling at him, and leans just so, Will turns in acknowledgment of the gesture, and moves so he’s standing to the left of Nico. Nico crosses his legs at the ankle and leans towards Will laying his head against Will where his neck and shoulder meet. Will leans forward and buries his face into Nico’s hair, comfortable and a little sleepy still.

"Coffee?"

"Mhmm."

"Good."

Will isn't the best cook, for fucks sake he's not even someone who could be considered a good cook, but he can handle this. Nico taught him the basics when they were still living at camp, Will failed every time, he ended up going home for a short period for Christmas break and begging his mom "teach me how to make eggs" he left off the bit about impressing Nico but he knows she knew. When he came back Nico had just smiled at him, "you practiced huh?"

Will hadn't gotten better at making much else, some eggs, toast, coffee and he could boil water now too! He had burnt lots of stuff over the years, plastic containers in the microwave, a plastic ladle they had on the stove top, at least 100 failed attempts at grilled cheese. Will was honestly just happy he hadn’t blown up any microwaves since he was a kid... 

Nico had come home to many of Will's failed attempts at making him various things, sometimes the food was underdone other times it was bits of inedible char. Will did try, he really did, but the heat was always too high or he would end up distracted, or he would use sugar on accident instead of salt. Will did actually try, but his best attempts still often left something to be desired, so he often was the one doing dishes.

Most notably one time Nico had come home to him attempting to pan-frying some fish.

It had been supposed to be a surprise, it was Nico's birthday, and Will had had the day off of class even though Nico hadn't. He figured he would have surprised him; it had been back in their first apartment, not quite as nice as this one. A cheap tiled cream counter top that Nico had literally cringed at when seeing it the first time, the cabinets had somehow been cheaper than a set from IKEA and it had become an inside joke to them.

He had walked in the apartment to see smoke coming off the pan with a bit of flame still coming off it, and a large piece of charred fish stuck to the bottom of one of their frying pans.

"Hey dumbass, what did you do in here?" 

People thought they were an odd couple, Will could see that. The whole parallel people drew between light and dark and optimism and pessimism and such between them, none of those people were really correct though. Will and Nico were more similar than they were different. At the end of the day it didn’t really matter what people said, Will liked Nico, he loved him in all honesty- he'd never heard the word "dumbass" said with so much affection.

Nico was hard for most people to read, years along had left him struggling emotionally in some manner; he did his best to hide most of his emotions, cloak them so heavily that sometimes they were even unrecognizable to Nico himself. 

The most obvious example of this in regards to Nico was how "shut up" often meant "I love you", "idiot" was synonymous with "darling" in some ways. Don't get Will wrong, Nico could be very affectionate, but pet names came with hesitation for him in the early days; Should he use Venetian, Italian, or English? Masculine words that were romantic had been hard for him to say as well... But everyday he grew and got better, and Will was proud of him every time he called Will “dear” and didn’t hesitate before or after. 

Nico had started masking his emotions at some point during his time at Westover, whatever he had done there hadn’t been much more than how much the average person masked their feelings, but when he started training with Minos Nico had doubled down on keeping his emotions secretive. Minos hadn’t been kind or safe in any sense of the word, emotions were what he used to manipulate Nico all that time, it was no wonder Nico developed such a strong sense of apathy towards anything overtime. 

Nico could be affectionate, he could be the most loving person to ever exist. Nico’s emotions were sort of like secrets, if you stayed awake late enough into the night you would only come to know him then, such was the nature of him. He often whispered so quietly his wants and needs into the dark, there was some sense of fear tied to Nico’s vulnerability and he handed off his worries each night to the stars soft glow. Nico often refused to talk openly during the day, but at night apologies and truth always came, he had known what he had wanted earlier he had simply been to afraid of the rejection to acknowledge it, Will is glad that with the years the worst of such things is over; it is unlikely to be something Nico will ever fully grow out of, such is the nature of humanity, but progress is a virtue.

Such times not only resulted in Nico’s acknowledgement of his wants and faults, but also garnered the most affection from Nico. Nico couldn’t always communicate in an effective manner verbally, which was still a process they were working on, but he did his best. Nico’s act of love was like that of a small bird, he gave you small things that seemed insignificant until you realized he had only ever told you such things. Will fell in love with him for it, it wasn’t just about the way he would describe the wallpaper in his childhood bedroom, it was the fact that nobody knew anything else about Nico’s childhood bedroom. 

Will had never truly understood the concept of “touch starved” until he met Nico, he had known the definition sure, but he had never truly witnessed it. Nico never asked for touch, but it was the way he leaned into it, the way he sought it out; pressing up against Will’s hand like a cat stretching trying to get a little more contact somehow, trying to make the touch last just a bit longer so he could savor it properly. It was literally starving in some manner, starving for contact that wasn’t a goodbye or a hit, just for wordless contact. When he grew comfortable he gave affection fully, there was a joy in holding Nico’s hand, knowing that he felt safe enough not to worry about the effect a few extra seconds of prepping for a fight that holding hands would add.

Nico didn’t show affection in big ways, and that was more than okay with Will; they were laid back in comparison to most, he’d have sought the comfort of placing soap bubbles on each others head in the tub a hundred times over a night on the town. Nico’s affection was something quiet and almost secretive, unknown to anyone it wasn’t directed at; it was the way he would lead Will out of a room to kiss him, or the quiet way he whispered “I love you” into Will’s ear when in public.  

Will supposes in the early days “shut up” became “I love you” in order to avoid being seen as weak in some manner, in order to avoid acknowledging what he really wanted to say and having Will not respond in kind. Will didn't mind, they weren't an overly affectionate pairing- banter was common, almost everything they did was turned into some sort of game, the term "boys will be boys" definitely applied to their relationship of 3am pillow fights, late night discussions about what order the Christmas ornaments had to go up on the tree in, and whenever they wrote thesis papers for living room debates over the best Disney villain.

Will honestly preferred it that way, he preferred having the little moments reserved for solely them. He preferred the aversion to sappy clichés, the way a lover could say your name with exasperation and a smile that meant the whole world. He had seen what some other couples had, quick kisses in lines at cafes, holding hands across the table, and calling each other pet names they’d made up that were somehow ten times worse than the original- and Will didn’t want that. 

It wasn’t that what those couples had wasn’t love, it just wasn’t love in a way Will could understand, it wasn’t love Will felt from those sort of exchanges. He didn’t understand the idea of “butterflies in your stomach”, love wasn’t nerves, love was like coming home after a long day, love was the way someone could say your name like it was divine, love was the way someone would smirk at you when you were missing the point, love was not being afraid to cry in front of them,  it was knowing you could show up to them with any problem and instead of leaving you they would research the ins and outs of it in all their entirety. 

The coffee maker makes a sound, Nico lifts his head of off Will’s body and the deep browns of his eyes are like the freshly turned dirt of fields in planting season, and Will feels like there’s a garden growing in his chest that Nico feeds. Nico sits straight on the counter and pulls his legs up and sits cross legged on the counter as he pulls out his hairband, and runs his fingers through his hair before pulling it back up without all the flyaways. 

Will moves towards the coffee machine, pours it into two cups, and sets one on the counter beside Nico before making his way to the fridge to grab creamer. Nico’s watching him right now, but there’s no need for talking; there will be talking in a minute. Talking about Will’s schedule for the week, talk of whatever project Nico is working on right now, talk of what they should do for dinner the rest of the week, little sweet nothings, and eventually they’ll make their way to the couch to watch some tv and maybe later in the day they’ll play some sort of game or something as well.

So yeah, maybe "light" and "dark" were polar opposites and some people would have walked out on the word dumbass rather than immediately loving it, but Will liked it- everyday was a game of sorts, a new adventure, all with Nico who he loved. Coming home from work wasn’t necessarily about the place Will lived but knowing Nico would be there for him to see was the point  of going home, home was wherever Nico was and some small part of Will hoped eternity was real in some manner.

Will remembered when Michael had died thinking nothing could possibly get worse, and in some ways he was kind of right; he had ended up with some sort of demigod style fairy tale ending with the man he loved, and that was ten times better than anything fifteen year old Will would have hoped for.

[notquitecanon]

Ohhhh or maybe one where the reader just makes jasper talk for a while just cuz she adores his accent 🥺

Jasper could feel your bad mood from outside your house- he was always so attuned you you. If his abilities were anymore developed he would probably be able to see your mood like a dark storm cloud hovering outside of your bedroom. Alice had a vision in the middle of their hunt of how your day would go, but with the sunny weather and the face they were already in the Canadian wilderness- he could do nothing but hope it wasn’t too bad. After stopping by his house to change clothes, he made a beeline to the tree line that surrounded your yard like a natural property line. He’d seen your silhouette in your window starting at five pm, but couldn’t make a move until the sun had gone down. The last thing his family needed was Chief Swan getting called because your neighbor caught him climbing into your window. The moment the sun dipped below the tree line, he raced up and into your bedroom.

You had been wallowing in self pity: already showered, in pajamas, and lying face down in bed with your computer playing some of your music quietly. The moment he crossed into your room, you felt his presence like a calming wave washing over you. Eyes fluttering shut as some of the tension left your body, you muttered, “Jasper.”

“Evenin’ Darlin.” His voice was like honey-warm, sweeter than sugar, slow, and sticky. Drawing you into his words and keeping you there while he lingered on the edge of your room. Ever the gentleman, waiting for your invitation. Prying your head out of your pillow, you faced him.

While you observed his freshly glowing golden eyes, slightly disheveled blonde hair, statuesque posture, and heavenly face- he did the same, taking in your tense muscles, dark under eye bags, flushed cheeks, and the general feeling of resignation and annoyance in your emotional map. He didn’t fail to notice you’d been crying- you didn’t fail to notice that he noticed. You were the first to break the silence, adjusting yourself to meet his eyes easier, “Good hunt?”

Jasper breathed a quiet laugh, such an abnormal question asked so nonchalantly, but entertained the notion nonetheless, “Most of us went up into Canada, into the mountains. Emmet took on a pretty big grizzly so he’s in a particularly good mood. I got a Moose and a couple deer.”

You didn’t know what truly constituted a “good hunt” but his thirst seemed appeased so you nodded. The head ache that came after a long day hadn’t put you in a particularly chatty mood. Jasper filled the silence, “Alice told me you had a bad day- well, told me you would have a bad day. I’m sorry I couldn’t help, doll.”

Shaking your head, you brought your knees up to your chest before wrapping your arms around them, “Not your fault, Jazz, bad days happen.”

There was a beat of silence as the two of you stared at each other, him trying to dissect every emotion you were feeling and you mentally begging him to just drop it. Finally, you just patted the spot beside you, motioning for him to join you. Talking waant something you wanted to do, but just having him close would be a big step towards feeling better.

As always, the vampire had a hard time saying no to you. So with the mattress dipping beside you, he easily slid beside you- staying perfectly still until you were situated. As usual, you bunched up a blanket where you cheek would rest against his chest- thick enough to cushion against his stone chest but thin enough to be close enough to smell the comforting scent he always had on him. Cologne, cedar, leather, something woodsy, and a sweet scent you could never quite put a finger on. After letting you settle, he looked down to you, “Wanna talk about it, sugar?”

He felt you shake you head before you nestled closer to him, so he just wrapped his arm around you alternating between tracing patterns up you arm and running cold, graceful fingers through your hair. One of your arms flopped across him just to have more phsyical contact, and Jasper frowned out of your sight. Besides truly changing your emotions (which felt invasive), he didn’t know how else to help. So for the moment, he just let you curl into him. Golden eyes raked across the room before landing on a book on your nightstand so without jostling you, he easily snatched it up.

Not bothering to read the synopsis, he began flipping through the first chapter- quickly becoming amused at the scandalous historical fiction set during the Civil War in Mississippi. Now that he thought about it, he remembered Angela passing it off to you during third period. He chuckled at a particularly inaccurate and racy part. His laughter was deep and reverberated through his hard chest which roused you, at your movement, he tried to quiet himself, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you. This book is just so terrible.”

His amusement made it hard not to smile as you tried to snatch the book out of his hands, the racy novel had been on lend from Angela and after the second chapter had been collecting dust on your nightstand. He easily kept it out of your reach, amusement growing at your protest (and quiet proud that he’d got you laughing again, he could already feel your mood lightening up). Listening to his laughter made you long to hear him talk in the smooth southern accent, about anything (anything other than that awful book), “Well, if the book isn’t up to par, how about you tell me what it was really like?”

As his chuckling was dying off, he thought about it before tossing the book back on the nightstand. It wasn’t that his past was an off limits topic, there was just a lot of it and he preferred to live in the moment with you. But you were staring up at him with hopeful eyes, and he could feel the remnants of sadness and frustration so he just nodded. “Well, first of all Mississippi didn’t see battle until The Spring of 1862, and union soldiers didn’t make any head way until a year later. So the notion that a this woman met a union soldier celebrating victroy in New Albany is just wrong. Even if it was true, she wouldn’t be so eager to fall into any soldiers tent considering Conderate troops would of torched her father’s plantation for being a sympathizer or vice versa.”

“Hmmm.” You hummed in response to the history lesson, before he continued going back and forth between learned history and personal experience until he hit where he was changed. You’d heard this story, traced the silvery scars on his arms, so once he went quiet you didn’t press any further. “So where were you at the turn of the century?”

“I was still with Maria, we were going back and forth across the border in Texas and New Mexico, I honestly didn’t now it was the new century until 1905, but we were the cause of the Austin Dam failure.” He mused, thinking pack, “I left shortly after the start of the First World War, to search for my friend Peter and because I was tired of fighting Maria’s battles- she starting to lose trust in me and me in her.”

You’d heard him talk about Peter and Charlotte, the only two he ever let escape, “Did you find him?”

“No, not until the late 1930’s, so I mostly just wandered around the South and the West as a nomad. The roaring twenties were fun between Chicago and Mexico City, I’d like to go back to New Mexico someday.” He thought aloud, cold lips ghosting on the crown of your head as his grip on you tightened ever so slightly. The hand laid over him searched for his so you could intertwine you fingers with him. He squeezed for a moment before detaching just to play with you fingers, burning hot compared to his cold touch.

“Where’d you go next?” You asked, letting him gently tug and curl your fingers with his. Jasper laughed bringing your knuckles up to his lips. When he had just fed, it was so much easier to be so close- which is where he preferred to be.

“You’re mighty full of question tonight, ma’am.” He teased, dropping you hand in favor of lightly digging his fingers into your side. The quiet squeal, laughter, and weak attempts at fighting him off was so delightfully human that he couldn’t help but do it every now and then. Jasper gave you a moment to calm down before continuing, “I spent some time in Tennessee and then Kentucky, the Great Depression hit those areas pretty hard, but it was better than being involved in a territory war.”

“Peter and Charlotte ran into me in the Appalachian mountains- that would be the late 30’s- it was easier to hunt without gaining attention up there.” He paused to gauge you reaction, carefully checking for any fear. Finding none, he sighed in relief before continuing, “They told me about Coven’s in the North, how there weren’t many territory disputes and how in some areas they could even go out in day light...”

You let your eyes slip closed, tension melting as you listened to his honeyed words, and his fingers toyed with your hair. Jasper kept going, talking about traveling with Peter and Charlotte through the Midwest and Northern states before breaking off from them too. Then it was the Fifties, going into a diner and meeting Alice. You’d always envied Alice a bit for her closeness to Jasper, even though you knew neither of them felt that way for each other, but you were also incredibly grateful to her- who knows where Jasper would be without her.

“I remember she said that I’d kept her waiting long enough and I thought to myself I’ve never seen this woman in my life, but I sat down with her regardless and she told me about ‘vegetarianism’ and our future family. I could feel her excitement but I thought she was crazy.” He laughed to himself, a beautiful sound. You’d heard this story a few times from him and Alice. “I was about to go on my way, leave Alice in the wind when she told me something I couldn’t ignore.”

You perked up, neither of them had ever mentioned this part of the story. Craning you’re neck up, you saw he was watching you expectantly with a soft smile tugging those perfect lips up- waiting for a reaction, “She told me that she’d seen me with my soulmate and her future family. She couldn’t tell me when, or where, or how, but she’s seen it and I had to trust her. She felt so sincere and I’d been lonely for so long that I left with her that very afternoon.”

You sat up very suddenly, blood rushing to your cheeks ass you turned around to him, “Jasper, you’ve never told me that before! What are you doing with me then?”

Jasper couldn’t help but grin at the flash of indignation and feisty anger, but quickly frowned when it morphed to hurt. His movement was much faster and infinitely more graceful than yours as you took your face in his hands, “You were the girl in the vision, (Y/N), you’re what I’ve been waiting for.”

It was like someone pulled a plug on your negative emotions as they drained out to be replaced by jittery happiness, and he didn’t need his brother’s telepathy to see the wheel’s turning in your head, “Oh.”

Meanwhile, you were trying to figure out the appropriate reaction to being told your someone’s soulmate. You’d never really imagined life without Jasper, you’d long since admitted to yourself that he was the love of your life, “Well, I’m glad you believed her otherwise I could be with Mike Newton right now.”

It was a bad joke, but he laughed nonetheless and pulled you back down with him, now wrapping both arms around you-effectively trapping you to his chest, but you had no reason to be afraid or even attempt to break free. There was a long pause of silence, him sending off soothing vibes, (it was getting pretty late) listening to the sound of your heartbeat as it slowed, and waiting for you to doze off. It did surprise him when you spoke back up.

“Where’d you go next?” It was quiet, sleepy, but a request he wouldn’t deny. He’d pay you back by asking a hundred inane question about your childhood tomorrow.

Pulling your comforter over the two of you, he adjusted you to what would be a more comfortable sleeping position. He continued, “Well, in took a few years but eventually we met Carlisle who welcomed us to the family with open arms. It took a bit to adjust to the new life of going to highschools and colleges, being around humans. Alice would occasionally drop little hints about you, your hair color, eye color, things you would do in her visions, and that was enough to encourage me to stay with it.”

You only hummed in response, turning over a bit as you let him nudge you towards sleep. Jasper was more than surprised when you made it to the mid-seventies without falling asleep, but was satisfied that he could no longer read any anger or frustration on you. Brushing a lock of hair out of your sleeping face, he silently laughed at your unconscious reaction to his cold touch. Yes, he had waited nearly sixty years for you.

“Good night, darlin’. I love you.”

Bad moods and all, he’d wait a hundred years more for moments like these.

[ryttu3k]

Part 2 of my season 12 reaction posts! Find part 1 (Resolution of the Daleks to Fugitive of the Judoon) here!

Praxeus

Thoughts on Doctor Who - Praxeus!

OKAY FIRST. THANK YOU, SHOW, FOR FIXING A BIG ISSUE I HAD WITH THE FIRST SEASON. So they were doing a thing where they’d introduce incidentally queer characters, have a female character mention her wife, stuff like that, only for them to die. This episode had Jake and Adam, married/separated/it’s complicated couple, who face huge amounts of danger, who both come close to dying, but who survive! And have a Big Damn Kiss! And walk off together holding hands! They survived!!

Plotwise, I enjoyed it a ton while watching, although in retrospect it did feel a bit free of danger. The companions were never in true peril because the Doctor can home in on them automatically, and we never got the true scale of the risk of infection, since the only people we saw get infected were in isolated areas. I would have liked to see, for instance, the threat of Praxeus spreading beyond just the very Hitchcockian birds; all of the peril was on an individual level.

Good message, if unsubtle. Mind you, that’s kind of Doctor Who’s thing, and it pisses off conservatives, so all for it, really XD (They must have loved the core relationship in this episode, too!) Like. Subtle doesn’t work. There are literally climate change deniers that exist. Sometimes you actually do have to tell a message with all the finesse of a sledgehammer because .

(Side note, I was deeply concerned when I saw the cowriter was the guy who did the hot mess that was Kerblam!, so at least this was just an unsubtle and kind of questionably written story instead of an actively harmful one.)

The companions: Ryan seems a fair bit more confident on his own? His initial scenes with Gabriela showed that he’s starting to work well even without backup, and picking up the bird proved to be a damn good call. Yaz and Graham were a fun pair, and Yaz got a lot to do when she and Gabriela (again!) got to explore, and I can definitely understand the conflict between curiosity/doing what’s right and safety when it came to the teleport scene. She does seem to be bordering on the reckless. Intriguing!

Minor plot snag - Graham knows how to set up an IV, presumably because of the shitload of time he spent in hospital! …And yet he doesn’t know what a pathogen is?

Friend note!

“fun fact about graham seemingly not knowing what a pathogen is! in my reading of the scene, i saw it as graham knowing what one was. with "Well, I’m glad you asked that…!” he seems like he’s actually sort of pleased with himself, like he’s about to launch into an explanation, and then IIRC there’s a very brief shot at Ryan giving him a Look and Graham immediately changes tone to “…cause I didn’t want to look stupid.” he immediately changes from boosting his own ego to bolstering ryans and im love"

In which case, good shit gooood shit.

SFX - the infection was creepy as shit. The very obviously puppet bird near the lab was hilariously bad.

Apparently the filming was tricky because it was super windy so all the shorts of Thirteen with her hair Like That weren’t planned, it just kind of happened. Love a fluffy ruffled Thirteen.

So anyway. People calling for more plot focus - literally this is the Doctor trying to distract herself and not focus on the plot! This is her avoidance tactic! Emotional honesty? Who’s she? She’ll get back to it eventually, but for now she needs a distraction after being punched in the emotions. Give her that for one episode, c'mon.

Ryan: “…I do a lot of running.”

Graham: “Whatever is giving off those weird readings… is on the other side of that wall!” Yaz: *silently turns scanner around* Graham, not skipping a beat: “…is on the other side of that door!”

Yaz: “I don’t want you to panic, but… we followed one of those things through a teleport and now I think we’re on an alien planet.” Thirteen: “…well, you don’t do things by halves!”

Thirteen: “That’s why you smell of dead bird! I thought you’d changed your shower gel.”

Thirteen: “I’m having half a thought. Ooh, this one tickles!”

Thirteen: “What can I say? I’m a romantic~”

In conclusion, Doctor Who said gay rights.

-

Can You Hear Me?

Thoughts on Doctor Who - Can You Hear Me?

Trigger warning for discussion of depression and suicide.

You know you're in for a wild ride when iView warns for horror themes instead of science fiction themes.

Overall: at first impression, it felt sort of mashed together? There's 14th century Aleppo, and there's 21st century Sheffield, and there's a deep space station, and there's creepy monsters and dream villains; I do kind of wonder why Zellin targeted a random girl in Aleppo as source for his pet monster, although targeting people like Ryan's best friend makes sense if he's deliberately trying to lure the Doctor to him.

The theme, on the other hand, of mental health resiliance and reaching out, was done incredibly well. Oh yeah there'll be more comments about it - the Guardian described it as 'adventures in Wokeness' - but damn, sometimes you need to hear it. I loved getting more of Yaz' backstory, about being a desperate teenage runaway at the point of being suicidal, and her reunion with the older woman legitimately made me tear up.

But like, goddamn. Her nightmare - she's still hearing that. She's still hearing her sister saying that she should "do it right this time" and that this time she won't call and that no one is coming and holy fuck. God this makes so many of Yaz' scenes incredibly painful in retrospect, knowing that she was at that point only three years before and that she's still dreaming that shit! It makes her recklessness terrifying!

Ryan's nightmare, and his experience with Tibo - it's quite reflective of the Doctor, too. She wasn't there, and Gallifrey burnt. And Ryan is realising this now, and really thinking about the potential future in Orphan 55. I think this is absolutely foreshadowing Ryan leaving at the end of the season (there's been a lot of speculation given Tosin's new TV role), and I think Ryan and Yaz' discussion at the end of the episode was a definite hint in the direction of Ryan choosing to going back to Earth.

Would have really liked Graham, during his talk with the Doctor, to gently remind her that she can talk about her own problems, although I can understand the narrative choice on why she didn't (although, yeah, would have been good for Graham to ask). Because, yeah, if anyone needs a sympathetic ear (...sans fingers) or a shoulder to lean on, it's her!! The entire theme of this episode was like... reaching out. Conquering your fears with the help of others. Sharing your fears to lessen them. Getting help. And the Doctor deliberately... not doing that makes it into an actual Thing that I think is going to seriously be addressed by the end of the season.

It's been such an ongoing theme. A bunch of episodes have started with an obviously depressed Doctor. The Fam has tried to raise the issue multiple times and have discussed it amongst themselves even more. Scenes like Yaz' reaction after being abducted in Spyfall (...which makes her, "I thought I was dead" part even more worrying) and being comforted by Ryan, not the Doctor... her whole reaction to Graham being like, "I'm glad you talked to me but I literally can't do the same in return" - if it's not addressed by the end of this season, it's at least going to have to be an ongoing theme, because it's becoming very deliberate now.

An interesting note: the actor who played Zellin (an immortal manipulator of nightmares) also voiced the Remnants (who were the first to mention the Timeless Child in The Ghost Monument). Coincidence or deliberate?

Assorted thoughts:

"I'm still quite socially awkward." There's socially awkward and there's emotionally repressed... (I saw a description of it on Tumblr as 'weaponised dissociation' and... yeah. And also yikes.) Also the way she was so closed in on herself, basically hugging her arms to her body! On a semi-related note, talking to herself in Aleppo was a bit depressing. Like it's continuing the theme of The Doctor Does Not Like Being Alone.

The finger thing - ew ew ew ew it's in their EARS ewww D:

Stylistic comment: the traditionally-styled animation for the Immortals' game was gorgeous.

"Try not freak out, yeah, but you're on a floating space platform trapped in a gravitational pull between two colliding planets."

"Thanks for lending a helping hand!" Companions just being, "...Doctor p l s."

On an old lore note, loved the callback to Eternals, Guardians, and the Toymaker! On a concerning note, man, the Doctor has so many issues with immortals. They abandoned Jack, there was the punishment they gave the Family of Blood, they had those Issues with Ashildr (from what I've read), now this, an eternal punishment with no chance of redemption, perhaps because she knows what immortality does? Parallels with the Doctor as quasi-immortal too, which Zellin even pointed out.

"You're wrong about humans. They're not pathetic. They're magnificent. They live with their fears, doubts, guilt. They face them down everyday and they prevail. That's not weakness. That's strength. That's what humanity is."

(Contrast: "That's what humanity is." The Doctor isn't human. She's not prevailing against her fears, doubts, and guilt.)

In conclusion, literally everyone but the creepy immortals needs a hug.

-

The Haunting of Villa Diodati

Thoughts on Doctor Who - The Haunting Of Villa Diodati!

tfw you think you're just going to get a nice spoopy historical and instead get major plot?

Overall impression: Well, Jack is going to be pretty miffed, given that the Doctor had to do precisely what he didn't want to happen - giving the Lone Cyberman what it wanted. To save Shelley, and also to save the future, although that does bring up the question on if the death of one person can rewrite the future, why doesn't that apply to literally everyone? Fletcher the valet and Elise the nurse died too, do their deaths have the same impact? Either way, the Doctor takes the Cyberium for herself - then realises that the Cybermen are inevitable, and returns it. And now she's trying to go and stop them. So... a bit conflicting in the message there, I think.

Yeah. Bit of a Trolley Problem there.

The characters were really fun. I did enjoy seeing Mary's sense of morbidness, but also her kindness and sympathy towards the Cyberman; you can see the foundations of Frankenstein there. I'm seeing some criticism of how Byron was portrayed as a coward, but eh. Nice little callback to Ada. Also I love how one of the rules was 'no one snog Byron'. Put that dirty boy back, you don't know where he's been! Glad Claire realised that too, although historically, she was already pregnant with his daughter at that point (and that didn't go well at all)... Either way. Good display of all these bright young reckless things.

(And yes, they were young. Byron was the eldest at 28. Shelley was 23, Polidori was 20, Mary and Claire were just 18. And while Claire lived to 80 and Mary to her 50s, the three men all died young, too - Byron at 36, Shelley at 29 - yes, from drowning, Polidori at just 25. Also wasn't mentioned that Polidori also created something on that Dark And Stormy Night along with Mary's Frankenstein - he wrote The Vampyre, the first modern vampire story!)

The Lone Cyberman (and I am deliberately using that instead of 'Ashad') - creepy as shit. Not just the whole Frankenstein look, but the way he acted! Not emotionless and blank, but actively manipulative and sadistic! Mary showed empathy and he actively threw it back in her face! I mean, yikes.

House was terrific and also spooky as hell. (Am lowkey miffed that no one went "VIBE CHECK!") The jumbled layout was quite Castrovalva, and I actually really dig that Graham got to see some actual ghosts. Ghostly sandwiches!

I think we got actual confirmation here that Yaz does have feelings for the Doctor? (Bleeding Cool News is pretty sure that it was for Ryan, but... lmao no.) BBCA twitter certainly thinks so!

Claire: "His answers only increase the enigma." Yaz: "I know someone like that." Claire: "This enigmatic person of yours... would you trade them for reliable and dull?" Yaz: "My person's a bit different..."

I MEAN.

(It got deleted. So. There is that.)

Thirteen: "Hmm. Fourteenth... no. Fifteenth century... touch more umami." (Doctor, have you been playing Detroit: Become Human again?)

Mary: "I don't think they're really from the colonies!" Byron: "No, she... is from somewhere much, much stranger." Polidori: "The North."

Thirteen: "YOU HAD ONE JOB."

Cyberman: "You appear courageous. But your vital signs betray a heightened state of anxiety." Thirteen: "Or as I like to call it... Tuesday."

Thirteen: "Yeah, 'cause sometimes this team structure isn't flat. It's mountainous, with me at the summit, in the stratosphere, alone. Left to choose. Save the poet, save the universe. Watch people burn now, or tomorrow. Sometimes even I can't win."

Claire: "You pursued Mrs Doctor without a care for my presence, belittled my thoughts and opinions... and then proceeded to use my person as a human shield." Byron: "...And?" Claire: "And the spell is broken... my lord." Polidori's face: "haha you fucked up dude"

Next week: Shit Hits The Fan.

-

Ascension of the Cybermen

In lieu of a proper post for Ascension of the Cybermen, here are a list of questions we need an answer for.

Will Graham and Yaz survive, on a giant carrier full of Cybermen?

Who is Brendan, and what is his relevance to the story?

What is the Boundary?

How is Gallifrey in the Boundary?

How was the Master in Gallifrey, and not trapped by the Kasaavin?

Who is Ko Sharmus and why am I getting Yana vibes?

Who is Ashad and what is his story? (And why is his theme such a literal banger?)

Is he an actual Cyberman? Because I'm totally getting this impression he's human in armour?

How did Brendan survive being shot, and why did his non-ageing father and mentor do that?

Why did it look like a chameleon arch?

Is Ethan's tech-savvy just warzone familiarity or something more sinister?

Are there any other large human populations left?

Was I detecting a hint of romantic tension between Graham and Ravio?

What's up with Yaz?

Why did the Cyberium get sent to that time period?

Who or what is this alliance Jack is a part of?

How do the Time Lords and the lie of the Timeless Child come into it?

WHO THE FUCK IS BRENDAN?

-

The Timeless Children

WELL THEN.

While I gather proper thoughts on The Timeless Children, here are the questions I had from Ascension of the Cybermen, now with answers!

Will Graham and Yaz survive, on a giant carrier full of Cybermen?

Yup! Disguises for the win!

Who is Brendan, and what is his relevance to the story?

Brendan is a filtered overlay memory of one of the Doctor's former lives.

What is the Boundary?

An anomaly, as far as I can tell.

How is Gallifrey in the Boundary?

No idea!

How was the Master in Gallifrey, and not trapped by the Kasaavin?

No idea!

Who is Ko Sharmus and why am I getting Yana vibes?

A big damn hero.

Who is Ashad and what is his story? (And why is his theme such a literal banger?)

We're still not actually sure. Either way, he's an action figure now.

Is he an actual Cyberman? Because I'm totally getting this impression he's human in armour?

Yeah, sort of.

How did Brendan survive being shot, and why did his non-ageing father and mentor do that?

Because Time Lords.

Why did it look like a chameleon arch?

It's probably related technology! If the chameleon arch rewrites memories, this one just wipes them.

Is Ethan's tech-savvy just warzone familiarity or something more sinister?

Just warzone familiarity. Poor li'l bean.

Are there any other large human populations left?

Possibly! If the Boundary really did send them to random places, there still could be surviving pockets elsewhere in the universe.

Was I detecting a hint of romantic tension between Graham and Ravio?

Maybe a bit XD And now they're all on Earth, who knows?

What's up with Yaz?

Who knows?

Why did the Cyberium get sent to that time period?

Ko Sharmus sent it. Didn't send it far enough.

Who or what is this alliance Jack is a part of?

Same organisation Ko Sharmus is part of. Also, young!Ko Sharmus/Jack please.

How do the Time Lords and the lie of the Timeless Child come into it?

In so many ways.

WHO THE FUCK IS BRENDAN?

The Doctor!

More thoughts later!

-

Thoughts on Doctor Who - The Timeless Children.

...Actually, first thought is the title. Timeless Children? Hmm.

Anyway. That is... sure a literally mind-blowing revelation for the Doctor, yes! Like, damn, the discovery that you're not even the species you thought you were, that your adoptive parent spent lifetimes abusing and experimenting on you, that your memories were routinely erased by people you thought you could trust (including your adoptive parent), that you're literally the progenitor for your entire species, that you've lost who knows how much time and who knows how many memories... yeah. Damn.

What's an appropriate birthday present for someone turning ten million?

Also, huh. Amidst all the old lore and casual mentions (like Borusa!) that got mentioned - were they taking hints from the Cartmel master plan? About the Doctor being some kind of founding figure for Gallifrey? Not exactly written as Cartmel had it, but that big main concept of the Doctor as a sort of... foundation piece of Time Lord culture was still actually there.

Brain of Morbius Doctors confirmed, I guess. I guess even Four was going, "...the fuck?"

Cybermen = still scary. Regenerating Cybermen = felt somehow obscene. Like, no, that's just fundamentally not right. Like the TARDIS responding to Jack by noping the fuck out kind of not right. God. And the Master was completely and utterly magnificently batshit, like, more than usual, come on, dude, you know they'd kill or convert you the second you turned your back.

Still. Deeply, deeply entertaining to watch just from a villain perspective, completely Chaotic, and like... I do understand where he was coming from? His entire life is a lie. His entire life is because of the Doctor, who, I think it's fair to say, he has Complicated Feelings regarding. (Their entire interaction this episode was a giant power play. Like damn guys just get into BDSM and leave the would-be genocide and universal takeover.)

Tecteun = Rassilon, I'm assuming. Goddamn. Like they were a pompous abusive asshole from the outset, this just kind of makes it worse. I also wonder if Rassilon chose the Master specifically to get the drums because he was friends with the Doctor? That actually may have been something the Master worked out himself, too. I mean, I'd be pissed off as well :-\

Also, how many people know about this? I assume Gat knew, since she was implied to be responsible for the mind wipes, but was it like... a super tightly-held secret or was it something a lot of higher-ups knew? Because that's fucked up tbh

Thought on the Master. Okay, he's hugely furious that he's been lied to, that the entire origin of his people is based on a lie, that his greatest friendrivalloveenemy is incredibly special and that a part of her is in him and not in the fun way, but like... I'm also wondering if he's looking at the Time Lords, the way they turned him into their puppet, how they drove him insane for their own purposes, then looked at the Doctor - someone who has also been used, abused, experimented on, manipulated, controlled, and went, "No. This is an injustice and the Time Lords need to be punished for it."

Oh, saw a nice theory regarding the TARDISes - Ruth!Doctor had the original busted police box TARDIS. When she was eventually taken in to be mind-erased, they sent the TARDIS off to storage to be eventually repaired. The Doctor manages to steal that one, goes to Earth, and it immediately gets stuck again because it's still broken. Explains how Ruth!Doctor can have the police box while also being pre-everything.

I really want the Doctor and Jack to sit down and have a nice chat about being timeless undying constants of the universe. Also for Jack to get one of the spare TARDISes around. Be kinda funny if he got the Master's old one, given the Year That Never Was, but it really is just sitting there. (Poor TARDIS stuck as a tree on a random wartorn planet in the far future, though!)

Also, Jodie was fucking magnificent in this episode. The hurt, the absolute fury, the almost glee when she's telling the Master he can't break her, her refusal to press the button at the end (so much like Nine's "coward or killer?" moment!)... just... so good.

Beautiful post I saw here on Tumblr - the Doctor as the Timeless Child, making the choice to help.

Amazing post here on Tumblr about abuse and repressed memories. Even if the Doctor doesn't remember it all, the abuse they underwent at the hands of a beloved parent figure still informs a hell of a lot of their behaviour, but it doesn't define them. The Doctor's need to run = informed by abuse. The Doctor's desire to help crying children = informed by abuse. The Doctor being an inherently good person = being their own person, no matter what their upbringing, no matter what their past was. They made the choice to be the Doctor, and that's a hell of an important thing.

Extremely painful post I saw on Tumblr about the Doctor being 'hip with the kids' by calling her companions her Fam but hell if they're not more family to her than her actual adoptive mother ow my heart.

Also, the scene between Yaz and Graham was so sweet <3 I do want to see Yaz, at some point, admit that sometimes she's so terrified she can barely move, and to tell him what she came so close to doing when she was sixteen, and Graham to just go, "Yeah, but you keep going." Also I'm trying not to think about how Yaz would respond to the Doctor going off on a suicide mission when Yaz was suicidal just three years earlier because ow my heart. She knows that Ko Sharmus went after her, she knows the Doctor might be alive, but either way, she's just seen someone she loves leave with the intention of dying (and Ko Sharmus too, actually). Someone please give her a hug. Actually please just let the Fam have a big group hug in general.

"Have you ever been limited by who you were before?" "Huh. Now that does sound like me talking."

So, remaining questions to be answered next season!

What actually is the Doctor? Since they were found near the Boundary, they could be from anywhere. It's fair to say they now are recognised genetically as a Time Lord, but what were they originally, why were they abandoned in the first place, and are there any more of their original people out there?

How do the Remnants know about the Timeless Child, or were they just picking up on that unconscious knowledge from the Doctor's own mind?

Like... we're generally under agreement that the Master, the eternal cockroach, survived, right? Despite definitely being lowkey suicidal like oh, was hoping the Death Particle would kill me? Like the Death Particle was made by the Cyberium, it could have gone, "Nah, keeping this one."

What's going on with the Kasaavin? Remember them? Still out there, stationed all through time and space? And are we going to see Daniel Barton again?

Is something going on with Yaz?

Will the Fam stay on? (I personally think Ryan will elect to stay on Earth to account for Tosin Cole's new TV role, and if Graham and Ravio enter a relationship, he might too.)

When will we see Jack again? If he was connected to the Lone Cyberman arc, that seems... pretty conclusively finished, unless we're going to learn more about it?

Is it Christmas yet?

............so the Christmas/NY special is going to start with Jack using his vortex manipulator to bust the Doctor out of prison and get back to the Fam and it'll never be mentioned again, right.

"At least buy me diNNER!!"

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #351

“the writing on the wall  /  a psalm of napalm  /  abandon all hope, but try to stay calm”

Do you have bad posture? Oh yeah. Are your eyes sensitive to sunlight? VERY. How many miles can you run without stopping? An astonishing zero miles. Who is the most attractive person you know personally? My high school friend Alon, probably. Have you ever dated someone who was very vastly different from your “type”? No. When was the first time you said "I love you" to a significant other? When I dated my first real boyfriend Jason at 16. I actually said it very early in because I thought I was "supposed" to, and I did REALLY like him. How old were you when you first lived alone? If you’ve never lived alone, how old do you think you’ll be? I haven't yet, and idk. What do you wish you had been better prepared for? Ha, adulthood. Is there anything about you (physically) that you think turns people off of you right off the bat? My weight. Do you know anyone with a semicolon tattoo? I have a semicolon butterfly tattoo on my wrist, and while it's very subtle, my Mark tat features a semicolon, too. It's outlined by a quote he's said ("you are important, never forget that"), and the "i" is a semicolon. Idk if I know anyone else with one. Have you ever overdosed on a drug? Once accidentally, once purposefully. Have you ever kissed a guy you didn’t want to kiss? Yes. Who was the last guy you cuddled with? Girt. What is something you’ve had a toxic reaction to? The breakup with Jason. In the last picture taken of you, how did you pose? I just tilted my head, smiled, and gave a peace sign, haha. Mom wanted to show my sister how I looked with a dozen wires and other shit attached to me for my sleep study. Have you ever made a fake Facebook account? If so, why? No. If you were an Eevee, what would you wanna evolve into? Probably Espeon? They're so, so majestic and beautiful. I'd love to feel like that, lol. What flavor was the last piece of gum you chewed? Raspberry lemonade. Did you ever used to watch the show Teen Titans? Nah. When you were in school/if you are in school, do you actually share your grades with your parents? If you got/get a bad grade, do you hide it from them? My mom always stayed up-to-date with my grades. I never really had anything to hide. Have you ever been the designated driver? Once or twice, yeah. Were you obsessed with Webkinz when they first came out? "Obsessed" is an understatement. I was that kid with dozens upon dozens. They were pretty much my favorite thing. Who do you subscribe to on YouTube, if anybody? Oh Jesus, looooots. Are you wearing nail polish right now? What color? No. Neon colors, or pastel? Pastel. Are you currently pregnant? Do you wish you were/weren’t? I'm not and have zero desire to be. Have you ever had a dog? A good number of them throughout my life. Is there any drama going on right now in your life? No. Does your hair fall out a lot? No. What’s your favourite type of bird? Barn owls. I also love ravens and crows. How many friends do you have on Facebook? 126. What was on the last sandwich you ate? Pb&j. What sort of music did you listen to when you were in high school? The same as I do now: metal and its various subgenres. Have you ever gotten back together with an ex? No. How far away is the closest store to your house and what is it? I'm actually unsure which is the closest. We live in a cul-de-sac with a bunch of houses, and the street opens into just outside the main city, so there's a lot of stores. What is your favourite Thai dish? I've actually never tried Thai food. How many contacts do you have in your phone? Very few, but I don't feel like counting. Are there any candles in your bedroom, and what scent are they? No. What pet names do you use with your significant other? I'm single. Do you have to wear a name badge where you work? I don’t have a job. Can you hear anything right now? Yeah, I'm watching Gab Smolders play Skyrim. It's a game I've always wanted to play myself. Is there anybody else in the room you’re currently in? No. What’s the name of the store you usually get your groceries? Walmart. Does your house have a porch/balcony? It has a very, very small porch. What is your mother’s first name? Donna. Did you have a tree house as a kid? No. Are you afraid of speaking to large audiences? I'm terrified of it. Have you ever cried from being so mad? Oh yeah, it's very common for me to cry when I'm mad. Have you ever taken a bath with someone? As a kid, yes. Do you have any brothers? One older one. Does your family use coasters? Is anyone in your family excessively tidy? No. Do you wear pajamas to places other than at your house? Ha, yeah, just depends on where. Do you take showers in the morning or at night more? Morning. I used to be ALL about night showers, but I just love how refreshing they are in the morning. It's a good start to the day. Do you snore? Steal the covers? Roll around in your sleep? I steal the covers SO bad and roll around a lot. God bless whoever marries me. You see the person you fell hardest for. What do you do? I can guarantee I'd be a total deer in headlights and probably tear up or just straight-up cry. Have you been/are you depressed? It's nowhere near as bad as it was once upon a time, but I honestly am depressed these days. Who is the one person you can completely be yourself around? I only feel entirely "safe" doing that around Sara. Are your popups blocked on your computer? Yeah. Are your parents night owls or morning birds? My mom's a total night owl. She absolutely hates sleeping because it's "such a waste of time" to her, but of course she does it anyway. I haven't lived with my father since I was like 16, so idk what he's really like with this stuff now, but I'd call him an early bird, particularly because his job has him up early anyway. Do you have high blood pressure? No; my blood pressure is actually extremely low, so much so it scares every doctor who hasn't treated me before. It's a medication side effect and seriously sucks, because I am absolutely always light-headed and dizzy. Have you ever pumped gas? No. Are you affectionate? Very. What would a perfect yard look like for you? Hmmm... I'm going to include things I know I won't realistically have for maintenance reasons, but what's ideal. I would loooove love love at least one really big tree with maybe a birdhouse and like a bat box (is that what they're called?), and I'd love tons and tons of flowers to feed bees and other wildlife. A koi pond would be amazing, but that's one of those things I know I won't actually have. A pool would be really nice, preferably inground, and having a spot in the shade would be perfect. Some berry bushes would be cool, and grape vines... Man, I'm really fantasizing now, haha. What is a topic that you have just recently become interested in? Nothing very recently, but I'd say the most recent would be uhhhh tarantulas, though that's been a thing for many months now. What is a feel-good song that you’ve been listening to lately? None lately, anyway. I can tell you "Jump" by Van Halen is the staple "feel-good" song for me, though. What are some things you enjoy seeing pictures of? Meerkats... Mark... more meerkats and Mark... oh also meerkats and Mark... Is there anything you are scared/awkward about talking about in life? Don't talk to me about sex. Has a pet ever stolen food from you as you were eating it? AS I was eating it, no. What is the weirdest compliment you have ever been given? I have no idea. What’s stronger - your upper or lower body? Jesus, I couldn't tell you. I'm just weak, period. Women tend to have more lower body strength, so I GUESS maybe that, but given the fact my legs are horribly weak, I don't know. My arms aren't strong, either. Are you very careful with your technology (phone, laptop, etc) or do you take risks that could damage them? I try to be mindful and careful, but you could say the way I pick up my laptop sometimes is risky. Have you ever been in the newspaper? What for? I think so, as part of my graduating class? But that would be a LOT of people... so I actually don't know. I have this faint memory of being in it with other people, but idr. Would you say that the area you live in is particularly picturesque? Ew, no. What is your favorite type of cat? One does not simply pick ONE favorite kind of cat. I love Persians, Ragdolls, Siamese, sphynxes, bengals, Abyssinians, and I could go on and on. If you had your way, what color(s) would you dye your hair? I have A LOT of colors I want to dye my hair, but the ones I'm currently most interested in are pastel pink, creamsicle orange, and lilac. Do you like seafood? If so, what is your favorite? If not, what is your favorite type of food? I only like shrimp. What religion/spiritual path intrigues you the most, if any? Paganism. It's the one I think is closest to what I believe in, and I just find it all very interesting. I love the nature focus. Would you ever consider getting dreadlocks? Nooooo. How many times is your cartilage pierced in your ears? None anymore. :( I miss all my piercings that closed while hospitalized. Have you ever had a pet bird? Nah. It'd be cool, but I don't want one enough to actually get one. Do you like dinosaurs? I looooove dinos. They were my obsession as a kid. My first dream career was even a paleontologist. Do you like going for long walks with friends? If my legs worked like a healthy fucking human's, I would love to do that again. I would literally collapse if I tried to go on a long walk now. Do you miss anyone from school? I miss a lot of people from school. I'm thankful for Facebook for that, but even that's not enough, really. What is your favorite flavor of Jolly Ranchers? Watermelon, I think? Was there a strawberry one? How are your parents right now? I'm assuming Dad's fine, and Mom's okay, just stressed as she always is. Can you take naps, or does it make you feel horrible? Man, I love naps. They're like, mandatory for my existence, lol. If you celebrate Christmas, do you get a real tree or an artificial tree? A fake one. Have you ever been told you were a good writer? Yeah. Do you watch music videos? No. Do you own an account on Club Penguin? Haha awww, remember the worldwide heartbreak when that site shut down? Anyway, I did as a kid. Do you like lemonade? Sure do. Was your first kiss perfect? To me it was. How do you feel about the first person you kissed? I feel a lot of things about him. As of right now, how do you feel about your future? Nervous. Who is the last person you ran into unexpectedly? *shrugs* Is sex something special, or just for fun? It has to be something special for me personally. Do you follow fashion? If so, why? Not at all. Have you ever played a real pinball machine? No. Do you like the smell of BBQs? I love the smell, but don't like the food. Do wasps scare you? Yes. Are you currently trying to get over someone? I mean, yes and no. I don't think I'll ever be fully over Jason, but I feel like I'm as "over him" as I'll ever be, maybe. I hope I can even further let him go, but we'll just have to see. Have you ever dated someone with longer hair than yours? Yes. Have you ever worn flip flops in the snow? HA, oh yeah. If it's only a dusting, I don't care at all. I pretty much always wear flip flops. How old were you when you met your first love? I was 15. If you could have one more pet, what? JUST one? Probably a Brazilian Black tarantula, ideally. I technically want a western hognose snake more, but given I already have a snake, in this hypothetical situation, I'd take the spider. Would you rather have an owl or a snake? Ha, speaking of snakes. A snake, even though I adore owls. What do you order at Chic-Fil-A? I don't give my business to Chick-fil-A. They're reigned by homophobic, transphobic pieces of shit that have given monetary contributions to anti-LGBT foundations, including most disgustingly those that support conversion therapy. I admittedly looooove their chicken sandwiches, but I just can't in good conscience go there. Have you ever been addicted to cigarettes? No, given I've never smoked and will never. Which do you use more? Facebook or Instagram? Facebook. Did you enjoy your past relationships? Yeah. Do you like '80s music? '80s metal is great. Something you would NEVER buy? Drugs. Have you ever questioned your sexuality? I first questioned if I was bisexual in middle school, 8th grade I think, but I went into denial about it given I was Christian at the time. Looking back, there were many clear signs of me liking girls too, I just didn't notice them until a few years ago when I came out as bi. Do you like Star Wars? No. What is the best thing about life? Experiencing love, both platonic and romantic. Are you superstitious? No. What show/concert have you gone to that you didn’t like much? I haven't experienced a bad concert before, but then again I've only been to one. Is sex a must in your life? Nah. Have you watched porn alone before? I've never watched porn period. I have absolutely no desire to watch two random people go at each other. What do you think about weed? It should be legal everywhere, but treated similarly to alcohol in that there are legal repercussions to doing certain things, like driving, under the influence. There are just too many benefits for many health conditions to ignore. Have you read the entire Bible before? No. I've started to before, but I didn't get far.

[annab-nana]

Spooky Season - Colby Brock

Colby invites some of his friends to go to Suicide Bridge and stay there overnight for a scary video idea to get into the Halloween spirit. They all experience crazy paranormal things, but y/n gets the worst of it.

Warnings: some curse words; mentions of suicide (past ones that occurred at the bridge)

Word Count: 3.1k+

--------------------------------------------------

“What’s up, guys! It’s Sam and Colby and Corey and Jake and y/n and Shea because they are the only friends I have that aren’t scared to do crazy things with me!” Colby said excitedly as he introduced the group of people around him to the camera. We all met up earlier and parked our cars a little way down from where we currently are. Shea and I came together and the rest of the guys came with Colby.

“So, as you guys know, it’s October.” Colby begins to explain to the camera before getting interrupted.

“It’s spooky season!” Jake yells as he gets super close to the camera that is set up on the cement that lines the sides of the bridge. As a group, we collectively roll our eyes at the silly boy. Jake backs away from the camera as Colby continues to tell the camera where we are and what we’re doing.

“Yeah, it’s spooky season and we are at a scary place that a few of us have been at before. Anyone want to tell them where we are?” Colby asks as his eyes scan over the group. We all look at each other before I decide to speak.

“We are at Colorado Street Bridge, which is also known as Suicide Bridge,” I say as I stuff my hands into my hoodie pocket. It���s freezing out here as the wind passes by us and the cars breeze past us as well, adding to the cold temperature.

“Yes, we are at Suicide Bridge and we are staying overnight. We’ve got a lot of stuff planned for tonight and a lot of stories of this place to tell you guys about, so we’re going to get started by walking down the bridge and then, we will head down to the bottom.” Colby says before turning the camera off. Sam and Colby led the way along the narrow side of the bridge, followed by Corey and Jake, then Shea and I at the end.

“Wanna mess with the guys?” I lean over Shea’s shoulder and whisper. Her lips curve into a sly smile as she nods her head. As we approach the end of the walkway, the boys turn to the left around the cement wall. After Jake and Corey turn, I stuck my hand out in front of my best friend to stop her and pulled her down as we crouched behind the wall. She started to giggle lightly, and I placed a finger in front of my lips, signaling her to quiet down. No more than fifteen seconds later, we heard the guys.

“Hey, Colby! Sam! The girls aren’t behind us anymore.” I heard Corey yell to the guys at the front of the group.

“What do you mean they aren’t behind you anymore?” Colby questioned, concern laced in his voice.

“They aren’t here anymore. I don’t know what happened.” Jake stated with worry. We could hear their footsteps approaching as they got closer to us. Right before they came up to us, I grabbed Shea’s hand and pulled her up as we popped out from behind the wall.

“Boo!” I shouted, which scared Sam the most since he was the closest to us without seeing us. I watched as relief washed over all the guys’ faces. Colby had turned the camera back on and filmed it. I turned to Shea and we laughed at our accomplishment of scaring the guys.

“Why’d you do that?” Jake asked with a smile on his face.

“Just getting into the spirit of Halloween,” I say before giggling once more.

“Well, come on. No more scaring please.” Sam says before going back up to the front to lead the way with Colby. Shea and I smile at each other, happy with our little prank before following behind the duo. Jake and Corey come behind us to make sure we didn’t go anywhere else. We make it to the bottom and find a spot to set up the camera so we can tell some of the stories that haunt Suicide Bridge.

“Okay, guys so some of us have been here before with Elton, so you guys may have heard a few of these stories before but I don’t think Jake, y/n, or Shea have been here at all or heard the stories,” Colby says as he pulls up some the stories on his phone.

“The most well-known story is the one about a woman who threw her baby off the bridge back in May 1937. The woman, Myrtle, came here the morning after her husband left her and she threw her three-year-old daughter off the bridge. Her baby, Jeanette, fell into a tree and survived. Myrtle jumped after throwing her baby, in hopes to join her in the afterlife, and is said to be walking around the bottom of the bridge in search of her baby.” Colby said as he looked to us to gauge our reactions. The rest of the guys had probably heard this story, but it was news to me, Shea, and Jake. Colby passed his phone to Jake so he could read the next story.

“The bridge was built in the early 1900s and gained the nickname Suicide Bridge during the Great Depression when hundreds of suicides occurred in that time. In 2008, a guy killed himself after he murdered his son’s mom and her mom as well.” Jake read and gave me the phone. I focused my eyes on the screen as I read the next story aloud.

“When this place was being built, a construction worker fell and landed in wet cement. He died there and it is said that he lures many to jump and end their lives here.” I say as my eyes widen and I hand the phone to Shea.

“People often see a man with wire-rimmed glasses walking around and a woman in a white robe standing on the edge of the bridge, ready to jump,” Shea finishes before handing the phone to Sam.

“It is pretty common to hear the screams and cries of ghosts who took their lives and are trapped here,” Sam says as he gives Corey the phone for the last story.

“Sometimes, people hear someone whisper ‘her fault’ but have no idea what it means or who it’s coming from,” Corey says before giving Colby his phone back.

“So, some crazy shit has happened here as you can tell, and we are gonna stay the night here. We’re going to look for a place to set up and then, we will get into the scary stuff.” Colby said and clasped his hand over the lens before he stops recording. We walk around for a little while until we found a place to set down our bags filled with supplies. Colby got his camera back out and began recording as he opened his bag with his other hand.

“So, as we’ve said several times before, it’s spooky season,” Colby says as he rummages through his bag.

“And?” I ask. He kind of left us hanging with his last statement, wondering where he was going when he said that.

“Let’s summon something.” He says with an evil smirk as he pulls the Ouija board out. I look over to Shea with wide eyes. We both aren’t big fans of playing it, but as long as we are with each other and all our friends, we can do it.

“Okay, let’s do it,” I say as I let out a sigh. Colby sets the board up and places candles all around it. After lighting the candles and setting up the camera, we all gather around the board. Colby sits down in the center. I sit beside him with Shea on the other side of me. On the other side of Colby sits Sam, then Jake, and finally Corey.

“You guys ready?” Colby asks as he places his two fingers on the planchette. We all nod and reach out to touch the planchette as well. I don’t know how we all fit two fingers each on it, but we did. We pushed the planchette around the board in a circle three times before we say, “Ouija, we are here.”

“Demons of the underworld, we summon you here to talk to us and communicate with us and through us. Do anything you must to let us know you’re here.” Jake says in a demonic voice and rolls his eyes up to make his eyes look completely white. His face looks terrifying and he’s acting as if he’s possessed. It freaks all of us out. Shea grabbed onto my hand with the hand she wasn’t using to touch the planchette. We both looked at each other, wide-eyed in fear, and I gave her a small nod, letting her know that it’s okay.

“Jake, stop it,” I state, half whining and half warning. Corey nods in agreement.

“Yeah bro, chill. I don’t mess with all that.” Corey says as he gives Jake an evil glare. Jake laughs it off before becoming focused on the planchette.

“I’ll go first,” Colby whispers before he asks a question. “Is there anyone here who wants to talk to us?” He calls out and we all look down to see what happens. After sitting there for ten seconds, the planchette moves slowly towards yes. I’ve only played the Ouija board a few times before with Colby and Sam and the others, but I feel like I’ll never get used to the feeling of the planchette moving underneath my fingertips. I am barely applying any pressure at all with my left hand, but it still moves.

“Are there more than one of you with us?” Sam asks loudly. The planchette moved little by little, gliding along the board and stopping at certain letters. It spelled out “not”.

“What does that mean?” Shea whispered, but she spoke too soon as the planchette moved again to spell something else out, “now”.

“Not now?” Jake questioned. “So, it’s normally got other spirits around it, but it’s alone right now?” Sam nodded to his questions.

“Are you a male or a female?” Jake announced to the spirit we were talking to. The planchette moved to the letter F and stopped. “A woman,” he said with a smirk.

“Do you have to flirt with every girl you meet, human or not?” Colby asked him, to which Jake shrugged.

“How old are you?” I asked aloud. The planchette moved around the board, stopping at 3 and then spelling out “and a half”. I smiled at the little girl we were talking to. She may be a spirit, but she still has that childlike quality. It was cute that she felt it was important to add the last part to her age.

“What’s your name?” Shea asks timidly. She still has a good grip on my right hand with her left and together, our hands were resting on my right thigh. I could tell she was terrified because she gets quiet when she’s scared. We all watched as the planchette moved, spelling out “Jeanie”.

I looked over to Colby with a puzzled look. Earlier in the story he read, Jeanette landed in a tree and survived. “I thought Jeanette survived?” I whispered lowly to Colby, who was to the left of me.

“I thought so too.” He muttered back. The planchette started moving again, but no one asked another question. We all went silent and fixated our attention on the moving planchette, trying to figure out what Jeanie is spelling out for us.

“Have… you… seen… my… mommy?” I said softly as I read what she spelled. I felt a shiver go down my spine and Shea’s grip on my hand tightened. I felt another hand on top of my left knee and gazed down to see a familiar hand, adorned with rings. My gaze rose from his hand to his bright blue eyes and I gave Colby a small smile. He gave my knee a gentle squeeze in return and we both turned back towards the board.

As soon as I did, I heard a soft whisper in my right ear, but it wasn’t Shea. I looked over my shoulder and saw nothing. I shrugged it off and turned back.

“Anyone else have anything to ask?” Colby asked the group. I looked up to see what they had to say, but off in the distance between Jake and Corey’s heads, there was a white shadow of a young woman, looking around. My eyes widened as she locked her gaze with mine and gave me a small smile. I was too in shock to do anything back and when I squinted my eyes to get a better look at her, all I could see was a hand waving in my face.

“Yo, y/n, are you here?” I barely heard Corey say as his hand waved in front of my face. I blinked a few times before looking at him. He stopped waving finally, but when I glanced back to where the woman was, she was nowhere to be seen. I let out a sigh and looked back to Corey.

“Yeah, I’m here. What’s up?” I say. Everyone around me seems concerned for me.

“Are you okay, y/n? You look really pale.” Shea asked as her blue eyes searched deep into mine. I nodded, reassuring everything is okay with me.

“I’m a little hot, but that’s all.” I chuckled lightly, trying to prove to them that I truly am okay and that there isn’t anything to worry about.

“Okay, well let’s say goodbye and then we will explore around here for a little bit before we go to sleep,” Colby said. We all pushed the planchette to goodbye and said it as well before Colby gathered everything to put away. Once he did, we all split up to cover more ground quicker. Shea and Corey went together to explore the right side of the bridge. Sam and Jake headed to the left side and Colby and I went to explore the middle.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Colby asked as he shoved his free hand into the pocket of his jeans. His other held the camera to capture anything that might happen.

“You mean earlier? Yeah, I’m fine. I thought I saw something, but it was nothing.” I tell him. Maybe it wasn’t real. I hope it wasn’t real. I shake my head of the thought and continue to walk closer to the bridge.

“Her… fault…” I heard a distinct whisper in my ear, coming from the side Colby wasn’t on. The voice sounded tired and worn out and creepy as hell.

“Did you hear that?” I asked the brunette next to me.

“Hear what?” He questioned.

“Nothing. Must’ve been the wind in the trees or something.” I think I am actually going crazy. I’m going insane. How can no one else hear that? We continue on, almost under the bridge at this point. We get closer and I see the white shadow lady again. This time, she’s bent over crying beside a small tree.

“I’ll be right back,” I whisper to Colby before I walk away from him to the lady by the tree. I get closer and hear her crying.

“Ma’am, are you okay?” I ask and reach out to rest a comforting hand on her back, but when I do, it’s like she evaporates and my hand falls through her misty form. Colby comes up behind me and grabs my hand, pulling me back on track. I can tell he’s weirded out by my actions, but I know he can’t see or hear what I’m seeing and hearing. So, I keep it to myself. We walk along under the bridge and my head starts to pound. I hear cries and screams coming from all directions. An intense heavy feeling rests in my chest and I feel like I’ll pass out any minute.

“Colby, I have to get away from here,” I tell him as I stumble, falling into him. He catches me, thank God, and picks me up. I feel drowsy and I snuggle into his chest, almost falling asleep. When we get farther from the bridge, I begin to feel lighter.

“You can put me down now. I feel better.” I tell him softly. He gives me a look for reassurance and I nod. He sets me down gently but doesn’t let go of my hand.

“You’re scaring me, y/n. Are you sure you’re okay?” He asks me again. I nod my head.

“I think I’m just a little sick, but it’s nothing to worry about. I can stay the night here and then, I’ll go home tomorrow.” I tell him. We walk back to our spot and see that everyone else is already there.

“There you guys are! I was starting to get worried.” Sam said when he laid his eyes on us.

“Yeah, we’re good. I think y/n isn’t feeling too well, but she said she’ll stay the night with us.” Colby said as my head was leaned up against his shoulder. I found my sleeping bag quickly and went to sleep before the rest of the group did.

“y/n… y/n… Y/N!” I heard Shea and Colby yelling my name. Their voice sounded so distant but grew closer. Before I could open my eyes, I felt two arms wrap around my waist tightly and lift me up. I brought my hands up to my eyes to rub the tiredness out and opened them to look around. I look down to see who had me. The rings gave away who it was immediately.

“Colby, why the hell did you wake me up? And put me down.” I demand as I slap lightly at his hands around me. He sets me down and turns me around, so we are facing each other. I’ve never seen him so scared before. His eyes were huge, and his face had lost all color like he had seen a ghost or something.

“Y/n, do you even know what you were just doing?” He asks me. His voice sounded scratchy like he had been yelling for a while. I look back at Shea who was standing near. She had been crying. I turned back to Colby.

“What happened?” I questioned innocently. Something bad happened when I was asleep.

“You were sleepwalking, and you were headed for the bridge.” My jaw dropped as he told me what happened. What the fuck? I felt tears prick my eyes and a few spilled over, trickling down my cheeks. Colby pulled me in for a hug, wrapping his arms tightly around my waist and placed mine around his neck.

“Please, get me out of here before I hurt someone,” I whisper in his ear.

“I don’t care about everyone else. I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”

[childrenoftherosx]

Let’s talk about: Patricia/Blaine

Welcome to the second part of my little series, this time we will have the two former Mono’s as topic. As always, enjoy~

Notes about Patricia/Blaine:

 First appearing in The Wastelands, Patricia and Blaine were slo-trans powered engines that were built by North Central Positronics head engineer Richard Quint. They were originally created for public transport respectively from Lud to Topeka(Blaine’s run) while Patricia ran from Lud towards Fedic(the southwest route). Both have started their lifes in the Cradle of Lud thousand years ago as the old ones were still ruling over Mid-World.

Patricia was the weaker willed and less developed engine wise of both which was the reason why Blaine took over most of the computers down in Lud, effectively becoming the city`s control panel in the process.

Thanks to their AI’s, both Mono’s became more human over the course of their lifetime. Thus it wasn’t really a surprise when Patricia began to get depressed after centuries of inactivity and loneliness which was only fueled by Blaine after one of her circuits catched fire which nearly caused both Mono’s to die. We know from the books that Blaine basically enabled Patricia to go through with her suicidal thoughts which ended with her drowning in the River Send a couple years ago, leaving behind Blaine who now was completely alone(which was the beginning of his own spiritual malaise caused by the subconcious guilt he felt about Patricia’s suicide.)

Much like with Mordred, these two characters, albeit nothing more than machines or Mono’s in that case, have won my heart with their backstories. Part of it was also their personalities which had very human like qualities(like feeling sad or depressed or even showing joy in riddling). Little Blaine was also a character i loved very much but he and Big Blaine basically joined back again after their first death anyway, thus i won’t talk much about him here. Some people theorized that Little Blaine was in fact Patricia who had desperately clung to a part of their shared circuits in order to keep Blaine somewhat under control. Personally i don’t like that idea very much, one reason i didn’t included it in my take of these two.

Anyway, since both were dead at the end and i felt they should get a second chance as well just like Mordred got, i decided to revive them via Bessa’s powers.

How they came to be:

After Blaine’s derailing in Topeka, Bessa appeared in the desolated city of Lud, visiting the underground where Blaine and Patricia’s motherboard was located and extracted their personalities from it(i mean hey, when babies can be faxed via a dogan, i don’t think this is far out of a reach), creating bodies for both Mono’s afterwards and inserted their AI’s in them. The reason for her taking in these two? She felt that Ka wanted them to join her.

Patricia had been more confused about this event than Blaine, but slowly started to realize that there were things in this world she hadn’t had to understand fully. Blaine at first didn’t even realized he was alive again, only after Patricia gently touched him did he fully understood what had happened. His initial reaction towards this was anger, then after the first shock had subsided, a small hint of gratitude showed up. After an awkward first meet and greet, Blaine quickly realized that Bessa had been the one bringing them back as well that she was the one responsible for Riddles in the first place, that she had invented them even!

Befuddled by this epiphany, Blaine agreed to come with her and Patricia to the Dark Tower where they would take their rightful place in the Tet of the Rose, which had only consisted of Penny and Mordred before. After their arrival, Bessa gifted Patricia a necklace with a rose as present and Blaine the Eternal Book of Neverending Riddles.

Even though Blaine remained suspicious about Bessa’s goal for a great amount of time, he began to trust her more the longer he spent time with her and the others. Patricia was quicker in trusting the goddess mainly because due to Bessa,she finally had found someone she could talk to no matter what. Bessa was also able to help balance Patricia’s mind so far that her suicidal tendency stopped for good(one reason for that was the necklace Bessa gifted her which had a special power)

The biggest difference to Canon Blaine and Patricia:

Not much to be honest, i mayhaps made Blaine a little nicer and less psychotic and with Patricia i basically had free reign since we haven’t seen anything of her personality aside of her mental breakdown due to loneliness, so yeah, i think these two remain the closest to Canon.

Random Trivia:

Blaine is absolutely not able to withstand pain, he has a very low pain tolerance and is quick to retreat if there is danger ahead. His favorite foods are Cheeto’s, Waffles, Mixed Pickles as well Popcorn. Patricia is able to sing very well and is artistically gifted. She likes to take on responsibility and taking care of her younger adopted siblings with a passion. Her favorite foods are brussel sprouts, lasagna and sweet cakes(chocolate flavored). She is afraid of water due to her drowning and can’t stand the ocean.

Both Mono’s appear as older teenagers around the age of sixteen.

[secret-engima]

Nox keeps giving the media meltdowns. How's that, y'know, working out for him? And what's the general reaction around the Citadel crew to the media circus? Also, how do people feel when they realize exactly how /powerful/ Nox is?

Hmmm for the most part, Nox is ... ambivalent to how many times he sends the media into a tizzy. He’s got memories of 2k worth of royalty and scandals, he remembers the invention of media networks and sometimes dreams of the invention of the flipping printing press. There is literally nothing they can say about him that he doesn’t already have memories of somehow. Honestly, it’s .... alternately tiring and hilarious to him. He kinda wishes people would take a chill pill, but on the other hand, since Regis would never force him to deal with the media circus unless Nox willingly agreed to it, he doesn’t particularly care. At least until he wants to- you know- leave the Citadel and go literally anywhere in Insomnia and Then It Becomes A Problem (Nox misses the days he was just a nobody with earrings and baggy clothes. So much). Though, since he knows that nothing he can do or not do will calm them down, he does occasionally indulge in intentionally poking them with a proverbial stick.

By Citadel crew I’m uncertain to if you mean Regis and Co + Chocobros or the long-suffering Citadel press corps, so I will just do both-

-Regis feels So Very Sorry for his eldest. He knows he couldn’t keep Nox a secret forever, but he honestly had ... hoped it wouldn’t get this bad. He’s afraid for a while that the media things will depress Nox or make him afraid to leave the Citadel/angry at being Regis’s son, but Nox just rolls his eyes at everything and ignores the media hounds with catlike ease (by which I mean he spaces out into the distance with a neutral expression and occasionally does the human version of pushing things off other things to distract them).

-Clarus knew this was coming. He knew it was going to get so much worse when Axis’s existence came out (it did). He ... would feel bad about this but this is just- royal/celebrity life. This is a slightly more hysterical version of normal. Honestly it’s the noble society he’s more worried about (he realizes quickly that his fears are unfounded, for a kid who’s been unknown for years he can verbally tear nobles to shreds with the best of them. Clearly a talent inherited from the Izunia side of his heritage).

-Cor hates the media. Always has, always will. No time for it. Not after all the stuff they threw out about him becoming a Crownsguard and then alter their role in cementing his hated Immortal title. Is fully waiting and ready for Nox to get mad enough at the media to condone Cor going out and doing Something Stupid And Maybe Bloody about it. Unfortunately, Nox never does, so Cor has to just sit and seethe and occasionally laugh evilly over Nox’s latest trolling behavior.

-Noctis doesn’t even know about the media storm for   y e a r s. He’s the bby Crown Prince, you really think anyone is gonna let this kid watch the news channels and the gossip talk shows? No sir. Not on Ignis’s watch. Noctis DOES hear about it at school though, with students bugging him about it and even TEACHERS side-eyeing him like they expect something Dramatic to happen. Noctis eventually gets sick of it and punches another student in the face probably. Ignis is scandalized, Regis tries to gently explain that no, Noctis cannot throw someone in dungeon because they said nasty things about Nox and no he is not explaining what those nasty things mean.

-Ignis is ashamed to look back and realize that he once bought into about 80% of the media meltdown over Nox. Now that he knows Nox better, he knows that none of it is remotely true and the world is not going to turn Game of Thrones on him. Now he’s ... very insulted on Nox’s behalf, but understands that it is not his place to intervene (though he does give patented Frosty Looks at any reporters that come sniffing around the Citadel forever after).

-Gladio does not watch conventional TV. He watches action blockbusters that have explosions, documentaries on wildlife/camping/hunting/sword-making and Iris’s favorite show about magical girls and talking, rainbow colored Chocobo companions when she makes the puppy eyes at him. That’s it. Is ... nominally aware of news and social media having fits over Nox but Does Not Care so long as they don’t bother Nox and nobody actually tries anything against Noctis’s big brother.

-Citadel press corps kinda hates Nox’s guts. On one hand, he is a Model Prince because he doesn’t go out and get drunk, doesn’t have wild parties, doesn’t have any actual scandals that they need to cover up or spin positively. On the other ... refuses to do press conferences. Refuses to do interviews. Refuses to do anything to help them mitigate the media meltdowns that his mere existence causes (and the events of the Music Drabble I have yet to write, OH BOY do they hate him for that). Just- hides in the Citadel and only makes appearances when it’s a mandatory ball/gala/thing or when he’s accidentally unleashing another media Meltdown. Agrees to one (1) private interview when he’s 18 and even then it’s ONLY if he can talk to some random, unknown rookie who runs a gossip column. They, by turns, want to strangle him and praise his existence, but at least he isn’t as bad as Regis and Clarus were in their day.

-It- would take a long time for people to really know how powerful Nox is. Like- out in the wilds of Lucis proper? There ARE people who know he’s way stronger than he lets on (the Hunter Corps and their families that he’s saved a bunch of times, plus everybody in Hammerhead who politely pretended Cid wasn’t housing the Nif Chancellor and his LC nephew for two years). The Hunter Corps, out of everyone, have the best idea of just what Nox is capable of, because they’ve ... put together a few things over the years. Like how Nox usually crops up in the area a day or so before a Niflheim base gets shredded/blown up/otherwise Wrecked™ for seemingly no reason. But his Real Power? That ... I’m honestly not sure how that would come out.

-But hypothetically, sure, let’s say something happened that made Nox go Full Fury on some poor hapless Nif soul (or army, probably an army). I’m gonna picture ... a Incident with a Kingsglaive held area. Nox is out there for like an official inspection or something, one of the Very Few media things he ever agrees to, when there’s a full on attack. While the poor Media People who are live streaming this freak out and the glaive get ready for a slaughter, Nox just- real calmly orders the glaive to Stay In the Base and keep an eye on the media people. Calmly walks out the base gate without so much as a by your leave and starts limp-striding his way toward the Impending Invasion of Death, Axis right at his side, just as calm (Axis knows what’s coming after all). Some glaives try to follow him because Obviously only to smack face first into - a Wall. A genuine magic Wall like the one encircling Insomnia.

-The entire Lucian nation plus whatever non-Lucian channels manage to pick this up get a livestream view of Nox raising a mini Wall around the base to keep everyone safe, then casually strolling out toward the Invasion force and just-

-Decimating it.

-About halfway between the invasion force and the base, Nox stops and raises a hand to the sky, a sword appears in his grip, and everyone present can feel magical pressure suddenly build-build-build until the air turns blue (the Wall keeps everyone inside safe from the intensity of the pressure except Axis, who doesn’t need it, he is Nox’s Shield and Nox will never hurt him). The Nifs release their war Behemoths on the field, gunships are coming in for the kill, and then-

-His sword sweeps down and the world shakes under the force of the pure energy wave that rises from his blade, sweeping across the distance between him and the enemy and either breaking, scattering, or straight up disintegrating anything in its path. An imperial dreadnought splits in half and then breaks into dozens upon dozens of pieces, the war-beasts caught in the path of the wave are just- gone. So are the MT units and gunships.

-Ever seen the upgraded armiger attacks from the Royal Version of FFXV? Yeah, picture those, but cranked up to eleven. Or just picture those and then imagine being an ordinary civilian seeing that for the first time. Ghostly blades whirling around Nox’s form, defending him from bullets and debris only to lash out as literal waves of energy or a death laser.

-Needless to say, Nox destroys that invading force single-handedly in a display not unlike the legends of Ragnarok or Armageddon, all while holding a Wall around the base. He then calmly turns, walks back to the base, asks if everyone is okay, and upon getting the all clear-

-Collapses. Straight up flops over into Axis’s arms while on national live television because someone forgot to eat anything today and spent most of the previous night fretting over nightmares or something (the rest of the world assumes he pushed himself way too far with that display, but really he could have done more if he hadn't already been tired/hungry and Axis knows it).

-For once, the media meltdown isn’t punctuated by frenzy but by a very, very fragile, frightened silence.

-It’s been ... a long time since a Lucis Caelum has Truly unleashed their power on the field and Nox is no ordinary LC.

-Clips of Nox’s stunt circulate for months, are analyzed by historians and doctors and talk show hosts for precedents and health risk and just sheer What levels. Social media ranges from cheering Nox on to snidely wondering why LCs aren’t doing that more often to a huge outpouring of concern for the prince who just fought off a literal army and then collapsed like he’d been decked in the head. The Hunter Corp all pool their resources together to get this idiot kid a care package, Cid probably comes over from Hammerhead to yell at him while Cindy bear hugs and cries all over his clothes.

-In Niflheim ... a lot of people are reevaluating their stance on the war. Because if that is what just one Lucis Caelum can do, then what’s going to happen when there are two of-age princes who are not chained down by the Wall?

-A lot of nobles in Lucis are also reevaluating their stances on the illegitimate prince, because UMMMMMM that’s the kind of thing that only happens in blockbuster dramas, and Nox did it in real life. More than that, he knew he could do it, as evidenced by how calm he was when he gave the order for everyone to stay.

-Lots of internet conspiracy/theory people try to figure out just how powerful Nox is and if he’s an anomaly in the bloodline because seriously can all LCs do that????

-A lot of people, for a lot of different reasons, are very, very scared of Nox now. Either because they still believe that GoT is inbound and that just put the kibosh on a lot of their rebellion daydreams or because Nox is already a wild card and now he’s proven that he’s a supremely dangerous wildcard.

-So basically, still a meltdown, but this one much, much quieter and more reverent.

-Assuming I ever do something like this in Nox versa canon, because I’m not sure I will.

[becky-helene]

How did I get here? (might be long post)

Thought one:

Y’all omg omg omg omg @octopunkmedia ‘s Detroit Evolution....FUCKING FANTASTIC omg omg omg. I screamed. I actually screamed. Well....it was actually a squeal. But still! Out loud audible reactions were had! Omg omg. You’d think I was watching Olicity, or Malec* (if in a universe where I was in SH/Malec from the jump and didn’t fall down that fandom rabbit hole much later/only recently, ie livewatching things, not having seen clips of big moments beforehand therefore knew they were coming and thus the impact of these long built up things was a little lessened) or any other OTP that owns my whole existence. That’s how loud and choked up I was. And even beyond otp/shipping, sooooooo good. Loved it. Loved everything about it.

Thought two:

....wait, exactly how did I get here?

Seriously. There was a time where Reed900 was so not a thing that pinged in my brain. I just didn’t get the appeal, and didn’t understand where it came from.

At first I assumed it was “they don’t even meet? Um so....i dun get it....”

....but once I suddenly found myself actually shipping Hank/Rose I realized that argument had no leg to stand on. (I think part of that is “I just want the human parental figures to androids to get together! Let them be all Yours Mine and Ours to our android babies!”, as well as part there were times while playing that Hank reminded me of my dad, and Rose reminded me of my mom....so, yeah, gonna ship my parents obviously lol).

Plus, given that Connara owns my soul, and their canonical interactions are just one or two degrees off of “but they never met!”, even more reason why that’s no argument to turn my nose up at a ship lol.

I think my Reed900 ambivalence really stems from a RK900 ambivalence. My dbh playthroughs have all been “I recognize there are other endings, but given that they’re depressing-ass endings, I’ve elected to ignore them” and I never get anything but good endings for the three protags, RK900 never appeared in “my” dbh, therefore there was no connection to his character the same way as Connor, Kara, Markus, North, Simon, Josh, Luther, Alice, and everyone else. If it wasn’t for seeing YouTube clips of various dbh endings, RK900 wouldn’t exist at all to me.

So, to ship a pair where one involved “didn’t exist” was so foreign to me.

Then came Detroit Awakening.

At first i was like “welp, dbh has consumed my soul...oh score a dbh fanfilm on YouTube! Reed900? Sure why not *shrug*, it’s dbh content! Gimmie!”

And I fell in love with Nines. The portrayal in Awakening definitely made the character now “exist” to me. So much so that it inspired things for Run With Me series/Take Me to Church sequel (...when I finally get back to updating the fic eep). I was originally not going to have RK900 in it at all, but Awakening inspired ideas of well yeah what would being activated and navigating emotion and existence be like for him? What would it be like for Connor? And then came a whole worldwind of aaaaaangst and conflict that was just too delicious to erase from my brain.

I’m not sure if RK900 in future fic=Reed900 yet, I think he’s so far in there as a “little brother” figure and source of conflict in the Connor and Markus bromance. But who knows where the muses take me once I get there (which given that I’m still working on TMtC....the muses have a while to decide).

(The closest I’ve so far come to some Reed900-ness is, in me going with one of the fanon propped up names for RK900 I’ve seen—Richard—-I had a funny idea of after everyone waiting for him to pick a name for himself, he excitedly goes “Detective Reed just shoved past me and called me ‘dick’. I have learned that that is a nickname for Richard! I’ve been given a name!” to folks at DPD and Chris winces and is like “umm....actually-“ only for someone, either Hank or Ben, to be like “*stfu look to Chris* Sure! That’s a great name, kid!” not having the heart to burst his bubble, lol. So idk maybe my muses will decide, much like Awakening, a Reed given name being paliable to RK900=Reed900. We shall see where my head’s at when I get there).

Anyway, so yeah, Detroit Awakening definitely made RK900, and thus the concept of Reed900, a lot more...I guess tangiable...in my brain. Fast forward to the build up to Detroit Evolution. It was at first just excitement for more dbh content+continuation and expansion of content I’d already seen and enjoyed, then more excitement at seeing just how much more expanded it will be, and then when it came to seeing videos with the cast+tiny snippets of scenes seeing the I guess chemistry between the two leads I found myself sinking deeper and deeper into the Reed900 quicksand until I was finall full on, to my previous attitude, “I don’t care, I ship it!”

So yeah, that then leads me to actually watching Detroit Evolution a little while ago and y’all I was in full ship mode: Sitting at edge of seat(bed), can’t keep eyes off screen, heart feeling full at the soft moments, wanting to scream “you idiot!” at the angst moments, the ‘omg i...is it going to happen? Oh please don’t tease....please don’t leave me hanging here....’ shipper chant, and the aforementioned actual audible vocal reaction lump in my throat had to pause the movie to recover moment.

And in pausing and taking stock of that reaction I realized that....wait how did I get to this point? I used to be so meh on Reed900. What happened?

@octopunkmedia happened lol. Seriously. I don’t know if I’m even necessarily a Reed900 shipper full stop in so far as seeking out Reed900 fic or other fanworks like I have with Connara or any other otp. (I think it falls in some gray ship area of I don’t seek it out, but if i come across it I won’t turn it away and actually like it) But I will definitely say I full on ship Michelle’s Reed900 lol.

Anyway so yeah that’s my long winded half screeching happily about Detroit Evolution/half self reflection on shipping & otp stuff. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[mysticdragon3md3]

The Meaning of Death: BoJack Horseman vs. The Good Place by Wisecrack

When they started talking about “all books have endings”, I couldn’t help but think of comic books, going on and on and on.  Before I switched to manga, I read American comic books, americomi.  So it was a shock to me, to get into one of my first favorite manga series and reach its end.  No rolling into new writers, artists, or storylines.  Just “this is the end of the series”.  And yes, it was nice to have a story so cohesive---with repeating motifs, foreshadowings, properly placed milestones of emotional progression, a perfectly unfolded theme(s)---because CLAMP had an ending in mind, even when they gave Rayearth a sequel series.  But when that first series ended, I didn’t know what to do.  Magic Knight Rayearth had taken up so much real estate in my brain’s fangirling, that I didn’t know what to do with it gone. I felt an empty spot, that was pretty big.  And years later, when Ranma 1/2 ended, there was melancholy and loss too.  ...Though, Ranma 1/2′s open-ended  “ending” to the manga felt reassuring, that Ranma and Akane were still out there, up to their antics.  But I think when that manga ended, some small part of me was still a little unsatisfied with the lack of finality.  Though compared to the vast majority of fans, it was a very small part.  I was actually very happy to feel like Ranma and Akane were still out there.  Even if their further adventures were only in our imaginations.  But yeah, it’s got nothing on americomi that has gone on for years and years and decades.  LOL

I watched Bojack but not the Good Place, so I thought I’d stop watching this video before spoilers.  But I don’t think this is even the first video essay on The Good Place, that I forgot to check out of before spoilers.  Whatever.  I used to be immune to spoilers.  My immunity has gone down, but I still feel that a series is as good as the experiences of its moments, vs just knowing what happens in the plot and the end.  I want a series/movie/story that feels good to re-watch, because the individual scenes are good experiences, in and of themselves.  So what do a few little spoilers---like plot points---matter?  lol  

And maybe that explains why I never liked the idea that death gives life meaning.  It sounds like the moment to moment experiences are negated or invalid.  If you’re suffering, it “doesn’t matter” because death will make it end and that will be meaningful in some retroactive symbolic way. If you’re enjoying a moment, then it “doesn’t matter” unless it’s eventually ripped away from you, or you or someone else eventually suffers.  Maybe it’s the suicidal depressive in me that doesn’t like the invalidation of the hells or heavens of each daily, “mundane” moment.  Once my sister and I watched a suicide scene in a movie and she didn’t understand why the character did it because he was happy in his relationship.  I just told her cryptically, “It’s an artist thing.”  Maybe I didn’t want to actually talk about the fear of good moments turning bad or wanting to seemingly stay in good moments by making life cut off right there.  Not that I agreed with the character. (Personally, I think death/suicide is for ending and resting from the never-ending suffering that is existence.)  He could have continued on, having many more good moments, he couldn’t have possibly imagined with his significant other.  My sister was right.  Death doesn’t give anything meaning.  It’s like what dream-Herb said in Bojack Horseman, “It’s just your brain trying to make sense of things.”  That’s just what human brains do.  But the comforting interpretations of people left behind doesn’t make anything better or worse for the person who had the actual experiences.  Maybe my problem with the idea  “can’t enjoy anything without it eventually ending” (or even “no light without darkness and no good without evil”), is because it probably plays into the same anxious insecurity that I have to deal with in real life.  I’d like to be able to feel secure in good things/experiences staying and not being called “invalid” unless it has an end in sight.  I’d much prefer for things to evolve.  Even if they transition so much that they’re no longer recognizable from the original, then at least each state was gradual and the necessary fit for each corresponding situation.  I’d prefer that good moments be appreciated, instead of being told they’re invalid unless they have an ending.  And I’d prefer bad moments stop, vs being told it has meaning, like the universe giving you “tough love” so you can learn to become “stronger” or whatever.  Sometimes shitty situations/feelings are just shitty.  And anyway, there’s no guarantee that everyone reacts the same enough to predict whether “tough love” will yield a “toughened up spirit” or a traumatically scarred mentality; the only certainty is that the dispenser of “tough love” is being callous, discompassionate, and often trying to make excuses to “allow” such abuse.  If there’s anything that’s given me the closest understanding of objecting to “the ends justify the means”, it’s my objection to the implication that the day-to-day daily moments don’t matter unless Death.  Like Cloud said in FF7AC, “There’s nothing that isn’t important.” 

Though I can be a little bit of a nihilist about life never having any inherent meaning, I actually just like the ideas that life can be given meaning and that there’s nothing cheap about that manufactured meaning.  (Who told that allegory about a man-made fire to sit by, being just as good as a fire that came out of no where?)  Even though I haven’t watched The Good Place, I like a lot of stories/series about immortality, my Personal Myth uses it a lot in Thought Experiments, and I do like muddling over such themes accompanying immortality.  I feel, just like a truly enjoyable movie/series/manga, the value is in the experiences of scenes and moments.  So what if you already have experienced everything for yourself and know how everything is going to end or know what patterns are going to repeat forever?  You don’t know what a moment feels like to someone else.  One of the tragic failings of language is that humans will still never be able to communicate their exact experiences to each other, no matter what the means of conveyance.  Anything short of a psychic hive mind is still inadequate communication, even that could be considered a singular being who doesn’t know how to communicate to other entities.  (Not without some trial and error, like in Eureka 7.)  It would be just the same as like individual humans to individual humans.  But maybe I just find an unusual amount of value and joy in experiencing things by proxy or from the outside.  Maybe it’s because I’m oversensitive and the bluntness of actually having first-person experiences is too intense for me.  But I enjoy watching someone else having an experience or even just imagining how they experience something, even if I myself have experienced it a zillion times.  Like when I watch an anime I already saw, in a video room with other people at a convention, or listen to reaction videos of a scene or movie I’ve already seen.  No matter how jaded I’ve become to the event, watching someone else have an experience and me trying to imagine what it must feel like for them, reminds me of how I felt when I first experienced the same thing.  But not just a recall; rather, the feelings actually re-manifest as a full emotional experience in and of themselves.  Not just a recollection of events in a plot.  Of course, a whole group of immortals jaded with their own experiences could become too dependent and addicted to the need for fresh people to have experiences for them to re-experience things freshly, by proxy...  ^.^;  There’s just something irrevocably new each time, to dealing with someone who isn’t already experienced with everything.  And all because no matter how jaded and “been there, done that” you’ve become, you still have to be kind and empathetic to other people.  Like when I was a teacher’s aid for 3 year olds, for 6 years.  I wonder if empathy is the reason why watching someone else’s experience, second-hand, by proxy, can be just as intense as a first-hand experience.  I wonder if the writers of The Good Place or all the philosophers cited would have had the notion that “once you’re jaded to your own experiences, there’s nothing else to experience”, if they were neuroatypical?  Where any of them HSPs?  And I don’t think that using other people as proxies for reinvigorating re-experiences is the only use of inexperienced people.  I think that genuinely caring for their emotions, not knowing what they’re going to do when you interact with them, having hopes that they’ll experience things well, and adjusting your interactive tactics to help guide them to good experiences, is instinctually emotional each time.  Or maybe my brain is just weird to care too much whenever someone is standing in front of me in real life.  But I really don’t think it’s just me.  As proof, there’s a lot of problems in the world caused by people ONLY caring about people in front of them in real life, so it can’t be that uncommon.  So then why get so jaded after depleting your own experiences?  Am I saying that mentorship is the “ultimate answer”?  lol  I dunno. But it would explain why people like raising children, even children not their own, when working as teachers.  In my Personal Myth, my main character is spiritually dying inside because she’s immortal and life is a never-ending hopeless trudge, that she no longer has the Strength to improve.  So she hopes instead for death, as a lazy way out.  But continually, new people she meets, and new experiences with old people she’s met before, keep pointing to the answer being to return to the Fight, the everyday battle to continuously improve.  After all, even in the jaded mindset, apparently perfection is still unattainable, because even complacency and satisfaction can spoil into stagnation.  So the answer was in the “martial arts anime” genre all along.  That must be why it always rung true enough for me to encounter it again, seeing the same tenants repeated in the artist community.  “Continual self-improvement”, “compare to your past self, not to others”, “progression is only measured by your own path, not someone else’s years of experience or natural talent”, “fear stagnation and complacency”, “be more concerned with self-improvement vs aggrandizing your ego”,  “recognize the True Strengths of Compassion vs Power”, etc.  Whether art or in anime martial arts, existence is a never-ending battle, constantly teetering on the edge of falling, then gritting your teeth to climb back up, again and again.  There’s always so much to do in existence, how can any humans get bored?  Maybe being jaded is less about having nothing new left to experience or do.  Maybe it’s more about being too tired to contract and expand to adjust to other people? Or just being too tired to overcome the fear that nothing will be different, no matter what you do or what happens, enough to stop trying?  Maybe I’m just falling into human cliches to value Evolution.  Or maybe that’s just the necessary value of anything living.  “Sometimes life is a bitch, but then you keep living,” to paraphrase what Diane said in Bojack Horseman.  Believing that Living and being truly Alive has to be about constantly evolving, both spiritually and mentally, is probably necessary for my survival as a living being.  Evolved into instinct, out of necessity.  

[she-is-tim]

I love hating you | Elu enemies to lovers AU | Ch.10

Previous Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 6.5, 7, 8, 9

Lucas is an angry, closeted and frustrated gay teenager, while Eliott is the handsome, smart and popular guy in school. They hate each other… but not forever.

It’s not your fault, it’s mine

Lucas started to get sick of all the teasing he got after that terrible party. Yes, he got totally wasted and yes, he totally embarrassed himself, but at least he remembered basically nothing of it. He didn’t needed others to tell him or remind him of what stupid stuff he had done that night. Thank god Eliott was avoiding the topic most of the time. First Lucas got worried that he crossed a boundary he shouldn’t have that night, but his boyfriend seemed to act normal with him. He was soft, touchy and flirty. 

They were a couple for almost two weeks now, things seemed to go really well for them. Sometimes they were together for a whole day, kissing and cuddling in bed, sometimes they were out in the park with the boys. It was wonderful, something Lucas had never experienced before. Sadly during the first week of spring break, Lucille decided to come back, she wanted to spend more time with her brother, which was understandable since Eliott had a bad depression not long ago. Still now they had no place to go for privacy, since Lucas only had a pull-out couch in the flatshare and Lucille stayed at Eliott’s place of course. 

It was a nice and sunny tuesday afternoon in the park. Lucille just arrived this morning, so the boys haven’t seen each other all day, they had to catch up on the missed out time. They weren’t alone though, both the boys and girls were there, chilling on blankets, listening to music and eating the sandwiches Manon made for everyone. Lucas and Eliott was a bit further, leaning to a tree, the short boy sitting between his boyfriend’s legs, back resting on his warm chest. His fingers were tracing on the veins that were showing through Eliott’s arms that were wrapped around him. It was a nice and pure moment. 

Lucas rolled his eyes when he saw what Yann posted. He was so busy studying his boyfriend’s beautiful hands, that he didn’t notice him taking a picture of them. Eliott on the other hand was really happy and already asked Yann to send him the picture in private.

“What do you want with it?” Lucas asked, slightly looking up at the tall boy, still laying in his arms.

“I wanna save these pictures for the future, maybe even print them at some point.” he answered with a happy smile. “Imagine a whole wall full of photos of us.” 

“A whole fucking wall?” Lucas raised his eyebrows. 

“Of course.” Eliott smirked and kissed his forehead. “Wouldn’t you like that?”

“A few framed pictures on the piano and the wall is more than enough for me.” he chuckled and pressed his lips on Eliott’s hand softly. “I like your drawings on the wall more.” 

“You are way too perfect for me.” Eliott mumbled, burying his face into Lucas’ fluffy hair, sniffing it a little. “You really like my drawings?” 

“If I had a room, I’d put your drawings all over the walls.” he said honestly, rubbing Eliott’s hand with his thumb. “They are amazing.”

“You are amazing.” he chuckled, squeezing him softly. “You wanna do something this weekend?” he asked after a few moments of silence.

“Of course, but no parties.” he frowned which made his boyfriend giggle. 

“We can both agree on that we won’t go to parties in the near future.” he said softly, kissing his boyfriend’s cheek. “I was thinking of something chill.”

“Like what? We can’t hang out at your place and everyone will be home at the flatshare too.” he said a bit worried. It was so annoying that they had no privacy during the spring break. 

“I’ll figure it out.” he promised and gave a soft kiss on the boy’s hair. “I wanna spoil your sweet butt.” he added that made Lucas laugh.

“I accept that, anytime.” 

Lucas first met Lucille at a coffee shop, on Thursday noon. He was really nervous since Eliott told him through text that his sister wanted to meet him. He barely could sleep and spent the whole morning going through his clothes and trying to decide which would fit best to meet your boyfriend’s sister. He basically drove Mika crazy yet once again, until Manon, god bless her soul, interrupted them and told Lucas to wear his grey long sleeve shirt with black jeans and his navy blue hoodie. The boy kissed her on the cheek before he put on those clothings and left. 

Eliott gave him a place and time to meet, but he haven’t texted since then. He actually really missed his boyfriend, even if they spent most days together, it was a real torture to be apart. But he was also really nervous, trying not to bite his nails off while waiting in front of the coffee shop. It was a nice and cozy place, he had been here only once, when he had a morning date with Eliott before classes last week. 

He had been there for only like ten minutes or so, when he saw them crossing the street. Even if he stopped walking around, his feet kept bumping on the ground and his hands were shaking, so he hid it behind his back. Both of them were tall, their hair had the same color and their face was wildly similar to one another. The most obvious difference was that the girl walked like a model, head held up, back straight, flawless moves with confidence, while Eliott had his hands shoved into the pockets of his pants, back hunched slightly, movements a little clumsy. Lucas still felt like his boyfriend was the most perfect and gorgeous human being on the earth. 

 “Hey, you look great.” Eliott said with a happy smile when they were close enough to Lucas, kissing him on the cheek, not on the lips. Noted. 

Hey, thanks.” he said softly and looked at Lucille now. She had a smile plastered to her face, but her eyes were screaming murder. The boy swallowed and held his hand out, hoping that it won’t be sweaty. “Hey, I’m Lucas, nice to meet you.”

“Lucille Demaury.” she said on a calm tone and grabbed his hand, shaking it just for a few seconds and pulling back. Eliott seemed to be happy.

“Okay, let’s go inside.” he said, grabbing both of their hands and walking into the coffee shop. They sat down into a nice booth, the siblings on one side and Lucas on the other side. He was really nervous that he couldn’t hold Eliott’s hand under the table at least, but this was an important part for their relationship to keep going. 

Eliott decided to get themselves coffee and some bakery, so he got up and walked away, leaving his boyfriend alone with his very angry looking sister. They were sitting in awkward silence for probably a whole minute, before Lucille decided to speak finally. 

“Listen, I don’t know how much Eliott told you about himself, but I won’t let anyone ever hurt him again.” she said seriously and Lucas had to swallow his nervousness to defend himself and his feelings for Eliott.

“He told me a lot of things, because he trusts me.” the boy started to speak with shocking confidence. “I know about his illness, I know about Sophie... He trusts me because he knows I trust him too.” he said seriously, looking into the girls eyes. Lucille accepted his challenge, staring right into his soul.

“Don’t be so cocky just because he shared some stories with you.” she said bitterly. “He is much more complex than that.”

“And I don’t care.” Lucas said a bit louder than he should be, so he took a deep breath. Lucille closed her mouth, deciding not to say anything to this and crossed her arms in anticipation. “Eliott is the person I care for the most, i told him things I never told anyone, I have feelings for him that I never ever experienced in my life and not you or anyone else can take this away from me now. If I have to fight for him, then so be it.” he said, determined look on his face. He could saw the ghost of a smile on the girl’s face before Eliott came back with two espressos and one latte for Lucas, also carrying croissants and some cinnamon rolls. 

“Sorry it took so long, but there was a few people in front of me.” he said and hopped down next to his sister with a bright smile on his face.

“Don’t worry, we had a nice conversation here with Lucas.” Lucille said, surprising the boy with an actual smile. “Right?”

“Y-yeah.” Lucas nodded quickly, adding sugar to his latte and sipping it slowly. 

“What were you talking about?” Eliott asked excitedly, he was happy that his sister was acting normal.

“Nothing special just yet. I was about to ask Lucas if he has any hobbies.” Lucille said on a soft tone and the short boy couldn’t decide it if it was real or fake. 

“Not much, actually.” Lucas shrugged. “I play piano, but other than that I have no special talents, like Eliott.” he said, flashing a soft smile at his boyfriend.

“Piano? Really?” Lucille raised her perfectly curving eyebrows.

“He is really good.” Eliott said proudly. “He even played some on the piano in my apartment.” 

“I needed to fix it a little, but otherwise he’s got a very nice instrument.” Lucas said honestly. “It’s a pleasure to play for him.”

“And he is an S student.” Eliott added with a wide smile, which made Lucas just a little bit embarrassed.

“It’s not a big deal, I’m better with numbers than with words.” the boy shrugged, trying to look cool about it, but he was watching Lucille to see her reaction.

“It’s interesting how you guys have nothing in common. I mean Eliott is an artist, has a really bad taste in music...”

“Okay, cut it off, Lucille.” Eliott said suddenly with clear irritation in his voice, turning his head at his sister. “What are you trying to say with all this?” he asked seriously. Lucille crossed her arms yet again and looked at him too, eyes narrowed. Lucas was fidgeting a little, hoping that they are not gonna fight because of him. 

“I’m saying that I don’t think this can work well.” she said it out now, being completely honest. “I won’t let you get your heart broken again.” 

“Oh, shut up! I was 15, when Sophie left me! I learned from it, and what I have with Lucas is nothing like that. This is so much more and I know he feels the same way.” he said seriously and the boy was really concerned now that they talked about him like he wasn’t even there. 

“I’m not saying this isn’t real, but you are volunerable...”

“Don’t talk like that about him.” Lucas started suddenly, surprising the siblings and also getting both of their attention. “Eliott is not more volunerable than anyone else. Yes, he is probably more sensitive, but he is just a human being like you or me.” he said seriously, looking into the girl’s eyes. “I am with him, because I know who he is and he also knows who I am. We doesn’t need anything else.”

Both of them were speechless after this, so Lucas tried to read the expressions on their faces. Eliott was just proud and happy, he had that beautiful smile and sparkles in his eyes. On the contrary, Lucille seemed impressed, a soft smile appearing on her face. She took a deep breath, drinking her coffee slowly before talking again.

“Okay, I kinda like him.” she said, glancing at Lucas over the edge of her coffee cup. The boy felt his cheeks turning red and he looked at his hands on his lap, fidgeting a little.

“Thanks.” he mumbled.

The rest of the day went on pretty well. Drinking coffee, eating baked goods, talking about casual stuff. Lucas told her about his parents spliting up, just slightly mentioning his mother’s problems, not really wanting to get into the topic too deep. Lucille asked about school, told some childhood stories about Eliott just to embarrass her brother. They laughed and had fun. 

When it got late, Eliott and Lucas said goodbye to each other. Some soft kisses, whispered words, then the older boy left with his sister, while Lucas also headed home, feeling much better now. As much as he was afraid of meeting Lucille, things went on quite well. They even exchanged numbers, while Eliott went to the bathroom, so they can get in touch if anything happens. Always prepared for the worst. 

After that both of the boys were busy, Eliott spending time with his sister and Lucas finally visiting his mother again. Sadly she wasn’t in the right condition just yet, so he decided to leave the boyfriend talk for another time. But he still enjoyed talking to her, even if she was mumbling bible verses randomly in the middle of the conversation. They had dinner together and walked in the park too, watching people passing by. 

When the evening came, Lucas was extremely tired, just wanting to eat and sleep. He made himself a cheese toast, since he barely had anything in the fridge or the cabinet and it looked like Manon hadn’t cooked. He sat down on the couch, watching some boring tv show, while munching on his sandwich. He got a little startled when he felt his phone buzzing in his pocket. It took him a few seconds to get it out without getting it dirty and he checked his messages. His heart started to flip-flop in his chest when he saw that Eliott texted him.

srodulv I have a surprise for you on saturday

lucallemant What kind of surprise? 

srodulv You’ll see It’s gonna be romantic

lucallemant I can’t wait I miss you so much

srodulv I miss you too

lucallemant Saturday when?

srodulv 17h30, I’ll go and pick you up at the flat Be your pretty self like always, no need for fancy clothing, okay? 

lucallemant Okay, I am really excited now Tell me where are we going!

srodulv That would ruin the surprise Be patient

lucallemant Fiiiine

srodulv ;)

On saturday Eliott arrived in time, welcoming his boyfriend with a long, passionate kiss. They were doing that for a few minutes, but then they had to break apart. The tall one walked to the road with Lucas, getting into a taxi with him. The short boy was concerned now, since they usually took bus or metro if they had to go somewhere. When he asked Eliott about it, he said that tonight is special, so he let it slide. He seemed to be more happy and touchy than usual, keeping his hands on his boyfriends thigh as they were in the taxi. They shared a few kisses, not being too affectionate in case the driver isn’t a tolerant person, but he said nothing. When they stopped at a fancy hotel, the boys got out and Eliott paid for the ride.

Lucas was too busy looking at the gigantic building in front of him. It looked wonderful, the entrance was huge, people walking in and out like ants. His boyfriend hugged him from behind, kissing his cheek softly. 

“Do you like it?” he asked.

“This was your surprise?” he looked at him still in awe. 

“Yes, we needed a place to be alone and this is perfect.” he said softly and kissed his boyfriend’s neck softly. “We can do so many things tonight...” he whispered into his ear which made the short boy shiver.

“Eliott...”

His mouth were quickly covered with the tall boy’s lips, pulling him into a long, passionate kiss right there in the middle of the street. Lucas wrapped his arms around Eliott’s neck, melting into his hold happily, enjoying the kiss, until his boyfriend pulled back and walked into the hotel with him. They were both giggling and smiling on the way up to their room. When they had the chance to be alone in the elevator, it was impossible for them to not makeout. 

The room was huge, with a big bed in it. Lucas could see the Eiffel Tower from the balcony, which was just breathtaking. He hugged Eliott happily, kissing him wildly. It was so incredible that he was standing in a fancy hotel, in a probably really expensive suite with a person he loved more than anything. He wanted to say it so badly. I love you. It’s a simple thing, but he felt like it’s not the time for it just yet. 

They sat down to a nice table that had candles and a boquet of flowers on it. Eliott opened a bottle of champagne, pouring some into glasses, giving one to his sweet boy. Lucas smiled happily, he never experienced such a romantic moment before in his life, so he wanted to save this moment in his memory forever. There were some cheese, ham, crisps, olives and tomato slices on plates in front of them.

“This is the best thing anyone has ever done for me.” Lucas said softly, grabbing his boyfriend’s hand that was resting on the table, intertwining their fingers. Eliott smiled at him softly.

“All I wanted is to make you happy and feel special. Because you are.” he said honestly, bringing their hands up to his face, kissing Lucas’ fingers. The boy blushed a little.

“I feel special for sure.” he mumbled and took a sip of his drink. “This is a really good champage.”

“Right? I chose it myself.” the tall boy said proudly, drinking some from his own glass. 

“Perfect choice indeed.” he chuckled and now grabbed a piece of camembert, placing in his mouth and enjoying the taste of the creamy cheese. He didn’t even notice that he was making inappropriate sounds until he looked at Eliott, who seemed to be really turned on by it. His face suddenly felt really hot. 

“Does that camembert taste so good?” he asked, eyes looking darker, focusing on the short boy’s mouth now. Lucas couldn’t help, but swallow and run his tongue over his bottom lip.

“You wanna taste it?” he asked, grabbing another piece and he opened his mouth, slightly sticking his tongue out to place the cheese on it. 

Eliott took a deep breath, predator smile appearing on his face as he leant forward, taking Lucas’ tongue between his lips, sucking off the camembert and then leaning back, chewing on it. The boy was speechless, just staring at his stunning boyfriend with a lovestruck gaze. Then it was Eliott’s turn, he placed a piece of ham on his tongue, waiting for his boyfriend to take it. Lucas never thought that a small piece of meat can be so intimidating, but his mouth started to water up. He swallowed before getting up from his chair, leaning forward. He parted his lips, taking Eliott’s tongue between them, sucking off the ham slowly, while they stared at each other intensely. 

Lucas slowly, really slowly pulled back, settling on his chair, feeling just a little bit uncomfortable in his pants. He swallowed the ham, eyes still locked with Eliott’s, who decided to lick his lips and shine him the most seducing smile he had ever seen. He decided to drink from his champagne now, trying to hide his blush, but then his boyfriend pulled out a joint from the pocket of his shirt, lighting it. He smirked as he took a drag from it, blowing out a cloud of smoke

“Fuck...” that was all that left Lucas’ mouth, but it was enough to make the tall boy look satisfied, raising his eyebrows to challenge him while inhaling more smoke.

Lucas decided to end this game right now, so he got up from his chair, walking to Eliott’s side and gently pushing away the table so he could sit down on his lap. The tall boy smirked, still keeping in the smoke until Lucas leant closer, their mouth just an inch away, lips parting. Eliott placed his hand on the back of the boy’s neck and blew the smoke into his mouth. When he was done, he leant his forehead on Lucas’ and sighed. The short one slowly exhaled, letting their faces be covered by the smoke for a few seconds.

It didn’t take long for them to end up in bed, clothes lying on the floor everywhere. Their kisses were wild, their touches were demanding, their voices were full of passion and need. Hands running up and down on sweaty skin. Moanings filling up the silence of the room, alongside some naughty noises their bodies made as they got more and more intimate. Eliott was extra careful knowing that this was Lucas’ first time, he wanted it to be special and painless. He did everything to make his boy relaxed, preparing him until he was basically begging for him to put it in. 

When they connected both physically and emotionally, Lucas felt like he’s seeing the stars. Waves of emotions were running through his body, making him shiver. This was the most intimate and sensual moment he ever experienced in his life. He only felt pain for a short amount of time, but then all was gone and the only thing he felt was pure pleasure. Their kisses were sloppy, sometimes teeth bumping into teeth, nails scratching soft skin. 

Lucas was laying in bed, the blanket only covering the lower half of his body, smiling like an idiot. Eliott was sitting not far from him, the other end of their blanket wrapped around his waist as he was drinking champagne staight from the bottle. He seems really happy, smile basically glued to his face.

“I really love this place.” he mumbled, looking at his boyfriend fondly. “I wish we could afford this more often.” 

“We can, we just gotta rob a bank.” Eliott said, smirking wildly. “Actually I can make the plan for that. You can be the distraction while I sneak in and get all the money we need.” he continued, which made Lucas a bit confused. 

“What are you talking about?” he tilted his head. 

“We could wear masks, I can be a raccoon and you could be a cute hedgehog.” he continued, ignoring the boy’s question. “Wouldn’t that be great?” he asked smirking. “Then we would be running away with the money and get married somewhere far from here.” he giggled and took a gulp from the champagne.

“We’re getting married?” he asked now, trying not to focus on the weird stuff.

“Of course.” Eliott answered quickly now. “I’m sure there are many Lucas and Eliott that are already married in parallel universes.” he smirked and laid down next to Lucas, rubbing his nose on his cheek. “Right?”

“Yeah, I’m sure there are a lot.” he said smiling now.

“Fuck...” Eliott mumbled, taking a bigger sip from the bottle, it was almost empty. “We should die tonight then.” he mumbled, looking at the ceiling for a moment and then back at Lucas with a smile. “While we’re at our peak.” he added. Now Lucas felt a little uneasy, pulling back to look down at the boy laying next to him.

“Why are you saying that?” he asked worried, but Eliott flashed him a soft smile, putting the bottle down, wrapping his arms around him and rubbing his nose into his neck.

“I’m kidding.” he said giggling. “I’m kidding.” he repeated when he saw that Lucas is still not smiling and planted a kiss on his neck.

It got late, the sun was setting outside when Lucas woke up. He was alone in the bed, so he turned around, still half asleep. He felt better when he saw that Eliott was sitting by the bed, staring at him. His sleepy mind couldn’t really focus on the weirdness of the situation, he just loved to be around this beautiful person, so he rubbed his eyes a little and smiled at him. 

“Don’t you wanna sleep?” he mumbled, Eliott let a weak smile appear on his face.

“I can’t sleep when there’s such a hot guy in the bed with me.” he said on a soft tone, which made Lucas smile. 

He was too tired to continue this, so he just closed his eyes and let the sleep take over him for now. Next time he woke up, he heard noises coming not far from him. He slowly opened his eyes to see Eliott roaming in the room naked, like a headless chicken. When he noticed that his boyfriend woke up, he ran to him, giving him a sloppy, wet kiss, then he headed to the door. 

“Where are you going?” Lucas asked, not entirely sure if this was reality or just a crazy dream. 

“I’ll go and get something to drink. I’m so thirsty.” he said, opening the door. “Go back to sleep.” he said softly and walked out, still naked.

The upcoming minute was like an eternity until Lucas’ brain realized what was happening. He jumped out of bed in a second and wrapped the blanket around himself, running to the door. He looked out to the hallway, calling for his boyfriend, but he was already gone. He tried not to panic, to remember the things he read on the internet. 

After he put on some clothes, he grabbed Eliott’s and left the room, shoving the key into the backpocket of his jeans. He left the building and looked around for the boy, while he also called the police. It was almost midnight, not too cold, but it wasn’t a good time to run around on the streets, and his fear of Eliott getting hurt just grew bigger. When he explained the situation to the tired officer on the other side of the line, he was hesitating. Tears were running down his cheeks, panic starting to take over his brain. He needed someone to help him handle this situation, so he decided to call Lucille.

“What happened?” was the first thing she asked when she picket up the phone, her voice still sounding sleepy.

“We were in a hotel... he is naked... He ran away, he said he wanted to get something to drink.” he sobbed, holding Eliott’s clothes tightly in his arms. “I already called the police... but I don’t know where he went.” he mumbled, trying to calm himself down, but his mind didn’t stop showing him horrible pictures of his boyfriend being beaten up because he’s naked or getting hit by a car. He shook his head and sighed.

“Okay, it was a good move calling the police.” she said, trying to sound calm, but she was just as upset as the boy. “Send me the address of the hotel, I’ll be right there.” 

“I will.” he mumbled, still looking around on the streets, like he was hoping that Eliott will come back to him on his own. After he sent the message he slid his phone back to his jean pocket now, waiting for Lucille.

When he snapped back to reality, he knew something bad happened. He was sitting on a steel chair, wrapped in a blanket, but he wasn’t wearing anything under. His body felt cold, but sweaty at the same time, it was disgusting. Eliott wanted to just rip off his skin and threw it away. His last memory was Lucas, sleeping in bed next to him like an angel he is. He was playing with his hair... then full cut. His mind went blank and now he was here, what looked like a police station, sitting by a desk in a small office. No one else was with him, but he heard voices from the hallway through the door. He could see shadows out there through the blurry window. His stomach twisted and he had to slap his hand over his mouth to hold back a gag. His whole body was shivering, his feet hurt, but not more than his heart when he noticed a familiar voice. A third shadow appeared in front of the door, smaller than the other two with long, crazy hair. He felt like he can’t breathe, putting a hand over his chest, looking around when he noticed a paper bag that probably had some baked goods in it not long ago. He grabbed it, letting the blanket slip off of his shoulders in the process. He lifted to his mouth and started inhaling and exhaling into the bag, slowly normalizing his breathing. 

He startled when someone opened the door, peeking inside. He was scared just for a second, then he noticed it was Lucille. She looked exhausted, like she haven’t slept all night. Eliott wanted to know what was the time, but he couldn’t bring himself to speak. A soft smile appeared on the girl’s face when she noticed that her brother was conscious again. There was an angry voice talking to her from outside, so she lookd back and answered quietly, so Eliott can’t hear them. She then turned back, squinting her eyes a little. 

“You don’t have to speak now.” she started softly. “Lucas wants to see you, do you want him to come in?” she asked carefully, studying the expressions on the boy’s face. Eliott felt a strong shiver going through his body and he really wanted to get rid of his skin now. He pulled back the blanket over him and shook his head quickly. He can’t let him to see him in a ondition like this. It was already embarrassing and terrifying enough that all this happened in the presence of his boyfriend. Lucas must be scared and he can’t blame him. This is not what he deserves. He deserves a boyfriend who won’t snap in the middle of the night, leaving naked and then end up in a police station. 

He felt streaks of warm tears going down on his cheeks, his chest kept hurting, making it hard to breathe. Lucille already pulled her head back, closing the door behind her. The loud argument from outside were getting on his nerves, making him feel even more bad. Lucas’ voice sounded worried and scared from what he could here, cracking sometimes when he was sobbing. Eliott could feel his heart breaking into millions of pieces. He did this, Lucas, his soft and caring boy was crying and yelling because of him, because of what he was. He deserved better, someone who is not crazy, like Eliott. 

After long agonizing moments that seemed like hours Lucille entered the room with an officer. He looked nice, smiling softly at Eliott, handing some papers and clothes to his sister before leaving them alone. He looked up, seeing the redness now in Lucille’s eyes which just made his guilt dig deeper inside him, eating up everything. She had a small smile on her face, but it was just her lips, her eyes were filled with worries.

“How are you?” she asked softly, holding the paper and clothes to her chest. 

“I feel like shit.” Eliott responded, voice slightly hoarse. 

“You wanna get dressed?” she glanced at the stuff in her hands and then back at her brother. Eliott slowly nodded and took the clothes from her now. 

It was hard to get up, letting the blanket fall back on the little chair he was sitting on. Lucille turned around, not wanting to make him feel uncomfortable in the situation and he was really glad for the gesture. After long minutes of struggling, Eliott was standing there wearing black socks, dakr blue sweatpants, a grey shirt and a black hoodie. He had no idea where these came from, but almost everything was his size. When he got ready, he softly touched Lucille’s arm, not wanting to talk. She nodded, wrapping her arm around Eliott’s waist, walking out of the office with him.

Lucas was back at the apartment, walking up and down in the living room, grabbing his hair, pulling it just a little to keep himself awake. He was up since midnight and it was already nine in the morning. Mika and Manon were in the kitchen, drinking coffee and tea. They didn’t ask anything, seeing that the boy was too upset to talk to them and he was really glad for their understanding, because he was sure that all he could do at the moment is scream at the first person that talks to him. 

He already texted Sofiane, Idriss and Lucille multiple times, but got no response. On the station the girl told Lucas that Eliott didn’t wanted to see him, it broke his heart and he was arguing with her for almost ten minutes, but then he decided to leave. Since then he regretted his choice multiple times. He shouldn’t leave his boyfriend in times like this, he must feel that Lucas abandoned him. He was scared and worried about him, not knowing what to do with himself. 

He jumped when he heard the buzzing of his phone from the direction of the coffee table. He had put it there earlier to stop himself from texting to everyone that could give him information on Eliott. He grabbed it faster than lightning, unlocking it to see who texted him. His heart skipped a beat when he saw that it was in fact an SMS from Eliott himself.

From Eliott I think we should stop seeing each other for a while. I am sorry that I scared you, but I need time to recover and being around you wouldn’t help with that. I hope you understand. It’s not your fault, it’s mine.

In that exact moment Lucas’ heart broke into pieces.

[fangirlshrewt97]

Venom Meets Goose

For: @lurkerviolin. Chancy I wanted to have this done by midnight but obviously I missed the deadline by a long shot, but I hope you like this!

Author(s): Fangirlshrewt97

Fandom: Venom (2018); Captain Marvel (2019)

Pairing: Venom/Eddie (can be romantic or platonic)

Characters:  Venom, Eddie Brock, Goose (Captain Marvel)

Rating: Teens and Up

Warnings: Lots of swearing

Additional Tags:  Attempt at humor, Crossover, Crack-fic (ish)

Summary: What would happen if/when Eddie and Venom met Goose? My 3k take on it.  

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18429209

“Stop being grumpy. It’s lame.”

“I am not being grumpy, I am angry with you V.”

“Stop being grouchy then.”

“Venom!”

“Eddie, I already apologized for eating all the chocolate Anne got us.”

“Venom, sorry is not enough. It was my favorite kind of chocolate. And you said that even if I eat it, you can still use the calories and taste the chocolate. You also know that that brand of chocolate is my favorite and it is imported. So in conclusion, fuck you.”

“I didn’t know!”

“Bullshit! You live inside my freaking brain. How the hell am I supposed to believe you.”

“...I’m not a mind-reader?”

Eddie growled out loud with enough anger to have Venom doing the equivalent of curling into himself and sending a wave of shame through their bond. Eddie hunched in tighter into his coat as a cool breeze passed through the street. He knew rationally he was acting childish, but could you blame him? He was finally getting his life back together, and after a full year with his stupid symbiote, they had finally figured out they were it for each other. He was happier than he had been in a long while. But he was also more petty than ever. And bloodthirsty, but at least the latter could be wholly attributed to the Symbiote.

“So where are we going?”

“Why don’t you just read my mind?” Eddie bit back.

“Eddie…” Venom whined. And god, how disconcerting was it to have an alien who lived inside him whine. Venom didn’t even have proper eyes, but somehow managed to convey the feeling of puppy dog eyes. Eddie hated him.

“Fuck off parasite.”

“Eddie!” Venom yelled, hurt and pouting. Pouting. His 10,000+ year old alien significant other was pouting at him because he was scolded for eating Eddie’s chocolate. God, when had his life become so fucking weird?

“I’m not apologizing.”

“Apologize.”

“No.”

“APOLOGIZE!”

“Ok, jeez, fine. I’m sorry. Quit yelling, someone is going to notice.”

“Who will notice? It is past midnight on a Wednesday. Everybody who is sane is already in bed. And if someone insane catches us, what is the difference?”

“I….” The more Eddie thought about it though, there was a weird logic to Venom’s point. “Fine, even if there is no difference, I’d rather avoid drawing unnecessary attention. Neither of us have a great history with good luck.”

“Are you going to tell me where we are going?”

“No.”

“Eddie.”

“You are getting repetetive.”

“You are being stubborn.”

“Wow, great observation there V.”

 “What do you mean, no?

“I mean no, wanna hear it in Spanish? No!”

“Eddie!”

“Venom relax. We’ve been cooped up in the apartment for the past week so that I could finalize my article, and we just finished. So I thought we could celebrate by splitting open a certain box of chocolate. But since you already took care of that bit by yourself, we are just doing the second part of this celebration: going to the park for some fresh air.”

“Why are we doing this at midnight?”

“Because I finished the final edits past midnight.”

“Couldn’t the celebration have waited till tomorrow? You need sleep. Your seratonin levels are seriously low.”

“Low seratonin huh? Explains the depression.”

“Not funny.”

“I disagree. But anyways, do you really want to this tomorrow in the morning. In the sun. With a lot of other people?”

“It’d be a Thursday morning. There would not be a lot of people.”

“Still more than now.”

“Why the park?”

“Why not?”

“Because frsh air and going to the park are good for your health. And your history has been a tendency to often do the opposite of what is good for your health?”

“Oh you mean like accept an alien parasite into my body that tried to eat me from the inside out?”

“Eddie!”

Eddie just chuckled, sometimes Venom was just too easy to rile up. He started whistling as the two of them made their way to the lake in the center of the park, Venom liked to see the ducks. Well technically he liked to comment on all the different ways he’d like to eat them, but who’s paying attention to those details?

Eddie made his way to one of the benches on the edge of the lake, just before the bike path and sprawled onto it, spreading his legs and resting his head against the back of the bench.

It really was a quiet night for the city, if he concentrated he could hear faint sirens in the distance, and a screech from where a car skidded on the roads which were still slightly wet from the rain they had had that evening.

Of course, when does quiet ever last when you were part-time hero/part time human magnet for bad luck? Though in hindsight, no one could have predicted the shape this particular disaster was going to take.

Eddie was close to straight up dozing in the bench when Venom startled so bad Eddie spasmed off the bench and braced himself on the ground to ease the fall.

“V, what the fuck?”

“Eddie, Danger!”

Eddie tensed, eyes scanning the area for anything out of the ordinary. “Where?”

“I don’t know.”

“What? What do you mean you don’t know?”

“I just. Damn it, there is something strange in the park Eddie. I don’t like it, but I can’t … find it.”

Eddie took a calm breath to calm down because this was Venom we are talking about, he could feel everything. If something was able to avoid him, they were in such big shit. Damn it, Ann was going to kill him if he died in the park to an alien at 1 in the morning.

But before either could think of a plan, a meow sounded behind them. Venom covered Eddie and launched himself over the bench, mouth pulled back to reveal all his teeth, expanding to make himself look as big as possible.

There on the bench they had just been sitting on was a cat. Just a normal orange cat. It tilted it’s head at the sight of them, but otherwise showed no other reaction. Huh, most cats tended to flee from him when he was masked by Venom. They also had been avoiding him in general since he had bonded with Venom.

“Venom?”

“Yeah?”

“Please tell me that you are also sleep deprived. Because what other possible reason could you have for being so terrified of. A. FREAKING. CAT?”

“Eddie. That is not a cat.”

“What are you talking about?”

“That is not a cat.”

“Yes it is. Look at it. It is orange, it is feline shaped, and it is just sitting there.”

“That doesn’t make it not a cat.”

“What the hell else is it?”

“I don’t know. But I don’t like it. Can we please leave?”

“Are you telling me you’re scared of a stray cat?”

“Eddie shut up. Can we leave?”

“But…”

“Now.”

Eddie debated whether it was worth it to argue, but his exhaustion won out over his curiosity and he agreed. “Fine, let’s go home.”

---

It was almost 2 weeks before they saw the cat again, and Eddie was aware of each day of those two weeks because Venom was doing the equivalent of pacing a hole in the floor in his brain and Eddie was getting a stronger urge by the second to find a way to strangle his symbiote.

“Venom stop that!”

“Eddie I can still feel that strange presence around us. Something is following us.”

“Where? Even in the park all there was was a normal cat.”

“It wasn’t a cat!”

“What was it then?!” Eddie bit back, tired of arguing this point.

“Can we go patrolling tonight?”

“No, I have an assignment due soon.”

“But, please. Eddie. We will be fast.”

“No.”

Venom whined and then started doing his stupid ‘puppy-dog-eyes’ emotion vibe again and Eddie growled because as much as he did have to complete this assignment, he hated to disappoint his symbiote. Venom truly asked for very little. Didn’t mean he was going to go without a fight.

“Why do I keep you around?”

Without missing a beat, Venom replied “Because the alternative would be developing a conscience of your own.”

“Fuck you.”

“I love you too Eddie!”

---

Their patrol that night was a bust, but Eddie knew it would be better to let Venom burn off that energy now rather risk Venom becoming restless again.

“V, stop complaining, it is a good thing that there are less bad guys!”

“You didn’t even let me eat one bad guy tonight.”

“That’s because the only ‘bad guy’ we saw today was a teenager trying to sell weed who pissed his pants the moment he saw you.”

Venom continued to grumble as they made their way to their apartment. He stopped when they reached their landing though, stopped abruptly enough that Eddie froze where he stood.

“What?”

“It’s in our house.”

“What?!”

“The same weird vibe from the park. I can feel that same energy again. Coming from beyond our door.”

Eddie swallowed before he nodded, tightening his hold on his keys and slowly turning the lock.

“Venom, mask.” Eddie ordered quietly. Venom slid over him slowly but completely covered him by the time their door closed behind him.

The two of them looked around the house for the intruder, moving cautiously though the apartment trying to identify the threat. Which was why they startled so hard they almost broke the coffee table they fell on when they heard a familiar meow.

“Ow, what the hell?”

“Eddie it is here?”

“V, how is that even possible?”

“It came in through a window!”

“None of our windows are open. Also we are on the third floor!”

“It’s a cat!”

“You just said it wasn’t.”

“It’s a cat that isn’t a cat.”

Eddie growled as he stood up, Venom having retreated back into him, and made his way over to the wall to flip the light switch. There on top of his kitchen counter, laying as though on its throne was the cat from the park.

Eddie approached the cat which was watching him lazily, one eye open as it swished it’s tail gently through the air. Venom was trying to metaphorically hold him back by the back of his hoodie, but Eddie just shut him down and kept walking till he was right next to the cat. The only acknowledgement he received was the cat turning its head to look at him with both eyes.

And yeah ok, this was definitely not a normal cat. Normal cats did not have eyes that looked 100 years old. Normal cats did not look like they could see into his very soul. Normal cats definitely did not have eyes that seemed to flash a different color. Eddie shook his head to make sure he had just imagined that.

Tentatively he reached out a hand and in full view of the eyes that were tracking his every movement, he laid it on the furry back. Venom had gone oddly quiet now, and Eddie didn’t want to think about it but it almost felt like the quiet someone has in a horror movie where they are quiet because they are about to scream.

Eddie started to pet the cat gently while Venom started doing weird high pitched keening noises in head.

“V, I don’t think she is too bad.”

“We need to give it back to it’s owner!” Venom said, voice higher than Eddie had ever heard it.

“Owner?”

“Yes! Look it is wearing one of those trackers.”

“Tra- Oh.” Hidden under admittedly magnificent fur was a thin collar with a round tag. Tugging it a little forward Eddie saw the word “GOOSE” emblazoned on it. He flipped the tag but the flip side was bare.

“Well so much for that idea. Is you name Goose kitty?” The cat started to swish it’s tail a little faster at the name. “Oh yes you are Goose are you. What a good kitty. How did you get up here though?” Eddie cooed as he started to pet Goose freely. Goose started to purr when Venom lashed out, a flash of inky black tendrils the only warning Eddie had before Goose was sent flying to the opposite end of the apartment and onto a wall.

“VENOM WHAT THE HELL?”

“Eddie that thing was preparing to eat you!”

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?”

“I JUST SAVED YOU!”

“FROM A HOUSE CAT?”

“FROM A FLERKEN!”

“A what?”

“That thing is not a cat, it’s a Flerken.”

“What is that?”

“An alien capable of taking any form and swallowing anything it wants to.”

“...Repeat that last part?”

“There have been rumors of a Flerken that once swallowed a small universe.”

“That is impossible.”

“Like having an alien symbiote live inside you that can heal any injury you have and which extends your lifespan considerably by virtue of being a compatible host?”

“...Fuck. Fine. We have a Flerken in the house. That could swallow us if it wanted.”

“It could swallow this whole building if it wanted.”

“That could swallow this building if it wanted. That you just threw into a wall. You knew what that thing was and you threw it into a wall. What if it is dead? What if it’s not. God Venom, you’re a dumbass for doing that.”

“Is that your way of thanking me?”

“No, that’s my way of calling you a dumbass.”

“I panicked.”

Eddie swallowed before approaching the corner of the room which boasted of a new dent in the wall. That was going to be a bitch to explain to his landlord. When he crossed the sofa that had been blocking his view, the cat was sitting on its hind paws, lickling one of its front paws without a care in the world.

“Good kitty, I am so sorry for my … Venom. He didn’t mean it. You didn’t mean it right V. V? Come on out. Tell the cat we are both very sorry.”

“No way!”

“V!” Eddie bit out.

Slowly, Venom’s head emerged over Eddie’s shoulder, looking as remorseful as it could. The cat- sorry Flerken had put down it’s paw and was now watching them intently.

“I’m sorry Flerken.” Venom said, tone filled with regret. Eddie wondered if the regret was for the action or for being stuck in this situation.

The Flerken tilted its head again before standing up and making its way to them. Both human and symbiote were rooted to the spot as the alien circled their feet before standing and bracing itself against Eddie’s legs.

Exhaling calmly, Eddie bent down to pick up the cat, trying to hold it as far as it could from him. The Flerken let itself be picked up, seemingly aware of how much they were afraid of it.

Once Eddie was standing straight again, the cat - well it grinned. Eddie didn’t really know what else to call it, but it’s eyes looked almost pleased, as if it had been testing the two of them and they had passed. Whatever the reason, he almost felt like collapsing from the relief that coursed through him.

The cat then lifted a paw and gently swatted at Venom’s disembodied floating head, causing the symbiote to yell and try to back away, knocking Eddie off his feet and sending then all falling and landing in a pile on the floor.

“Owwww.” Eddie exclaimed as he sat up, rubbing a sore spot on his back where he had landed. So much for a symbiote cushion.

“Sorry Eddie.”

“Venom can you just come out. This cat is not going to hurt us.”

“Yes it will.”

“I think you’re wrong.” Eddie shifted to look at the cat on his chest that was still looking at them and not moving. “You’re not going to hurt us right?”

Well, Eddie could officially say he knew what a cat would look like with an exasperated look on its face.

“See, it’s not going to hurt us.”

Venom carefully emerged again, still hovering. The Flerken hopped off Eddie’s chest onto a distance about 5 feet from them before opening its mouth and -

 “OHMYGOD WE ARE GOINGTOBE EATEN BYANALIEN CAT!” Eddie screamed as he scrambled to back away from the TENTACLES that were coming out of the Flerken’s mouth.

“No wait, Eddie. Stop.” Venom said, sounding reasonable. Which what the hell, up until this point Venom is convinced they are going to be killed by this cat and the moment when it seems like that act is going to happen, he is suddenly chill? What gives?

Without waiting for a reply, Venom masked Eddie, and leisurely put out tendrils of his own. Then the two met in the middle and did this almost weird dance thing before they came back to normal.

“What the fuck?”

“We are cool now Eddie.”

“What. The. Fuck?”

“Me and the Flerken made an agreement.”

“What?”

“You are being repetitive again.”

“Venom, I am confused. Explain.”

“The Flerken asked if it could stay with us for a while. I said ok.”

“That is not an explanation.”

“It doesn’t matter. All you need to know is that it will be staying with us a couple weeks until its friend comes back for it. And it wants us to call it Goose.”

“When did all this communication happen?”

“During our tentable handshake.”

“Tenta- you know what. I’m too tired for this. Just tell it to stay out of the bedroom. I am going to bed.

“Goodnight Goose!” Venom called back, sounding stupidly cheery.

Eddie wanted this all to be over.

---

The weeks they had with Goose were surprisingly normal, the cat stayed out of their way for the most part, just following them out when they went on patrols, and on one memorable occasion when it ate a drug dealer that had kept shooting at Venom.

Venom had been annoyed at the missed meal.

The other memorable occasion was when Anne came by and found out the cat wasn’t a cat.

She had been rightfully angry. And scared. She had forgiven them eventually though. Thank god. They would be lost without her.

---

Eddie was almost sad when they came back from the apartment at the end of three weeks of cohabiting with a Flerken to an open window and a note thanking them for taking care of Goose, signed on the bottom by a M. Rambeau and an orange cat paw print.

Eddie had to buy a large chocolate box to console Venom who had grown surprisingly attached to the Flerken he had been terrified of. Eddie hoped they got to see Goose again. He had grown fond of the cat too, damn it.

… What even was his life that he was missing an alien with the ability to swallow universeres that almost tried to eat him too.

Maybe he should go visit that therapist friend of Anne’s…

 THE END

[an-ambivalent]

The Little Mermaid [Yandere! Jungkook] [Reader-Insert] Part 1

A/N: This story will contain content that can make you uncomfortable. Read at your own risk.

Also, as you read this story, you may find it weird. It’s cool if you don’t like it, I had this idea, and I really wanted to write it. It maybe be cringe to you, but its fun for me, so if you have any negative feedback, please keep it to yourself :)

It was a surreal world where mythology was real and fantasies existed. Human kind lived in the era of royal patriarchy, decided fates, pirates, and with hints of magic. In this surreal world, creatures that were just rumours to humans, lived amongst the rest of the life. Under the roaring tides, and in the depths of the great rich blue sea, there were mermen.

Amongst their population, Jeon Jungkook was a young merman who had recently been crowned their king, due to the passing of his father. The former prince was not an ideal or a wanted candidate as their next ruler. However, no one could deny him his right to the throne since the royal family held all the power. Whether the mermen lived an era of peace and serenity, or an era of the great depression where everything was in shambles, it depended on the actions of their leader. The fallen king was a person of kindness, who wielded strength when it was needed. For that reason, he was an ideal king who was respected and loved.

However, his only offspring, Prince Jungkook, was a bit ‘special.’ While he was exceptionally talented in all fields that were required – a prodigy, it was rather obvious that he had no interest in being a great king. Rather than practicing and refining the skills he needed as the king, Jungkook ‘wasted’ his time by wandering the oceans in order to explore and collect things that fell from the shore and belonged to humans.

Rather than using his authority, and time to improve the living for his people, he sent soldiers to the dangerous parts of the ocean to retrieve human treasures. He unintelligently risked the lives of many strong soldiers simply due to his obsession with the creatures of the land. Needlessly to say, after this and few other similar incidents, many were aggravated with Jungkook. However, he could care less because he was their king. It was his word against some peasants, and of course, the latter could not do anything against him.

His carelessness reached the point where he began to completely neglect his duties as the king and became focused on his obsession with humans.

Due to his immaturity and young age, Jungkook was perceived to be ignorant. However, in reality, Jungkook was very intelligent. At least, he was when it came to humans.

Jungkook spent a lot of time observing humans. Overtime, he came to realize that no matter how much he may have wanted to, he could never reveal himself to them. Unlike mermen who knew about the existence of other mythical creatures and humans, the latter species were clueless about any other existing creatures other than themselves and animals. So if they found out about him, he would definitely be dead meat.

Whenever Jungkook observed the endeavouring explorers of the sea, he would watch them hunt other sea creatures. Then, they would cut it up, burn it, and eat it. Simultaneously, they would begin to gulp down some unknown beverage from a jug,  while dancing as if they were partaking in a celebration. This was a common ritual he had watched numerous of times. It was interesting, but after seeing it so many times, it was starting to lose its spark and bore him. However, each time he did continue to watch them, they all said something that stuck with him.

“The only thing we’re missing are a couple of women to really get this party going, dontcha think?”

“God, I wish I had a woman for tonight. It’s been a long time since I’ve had some.”

It got Jungkook wondering.

What was a woman?

It seemed to be some sort of great entity or treasure that all humans wished for. He was curious about it, and if it was truly as great as it seemed since all humans desired it, Jungkook wanted to have it too.

And he did.

He encountered a woman on one particular ‘fated’ night.

On that night, the ocean waves were vicious and angry. They ruthlessly hit the bottom of the big ship, and swayed it away from its set course. The grey clouds were hefty with rain, as lightning sparked and lit up the grey atmosphere. Thunder rumbled loudly, and raindrops fell fast and strong from the clouds. The wind ruthlessly swatted against anything that was in its path.

As usual, Jungkook was swimming underneath the ocean waves. From a distance, he observed the ship being mercilessly pushed. He heard loud yells of panic and fear, and random and various orders being shouted. Among the deep and masculine voices, there was one that stood out to him.

It was much more quieter, and softer than any voice he had ever heard before. It was mellifluous, and it made shivers run down his spine. For a moment, it caused Jungkook’s eyes to widen. The other voices overpowered the soft one his ears had picked up on. However, because of his heightened hearing as a merman, he was still able to hear it as muffled murmuring.

The unique voice peaked his curiosity, and subconsciously, Jungkook swam faster towards the ship.

It wasn’t long before the storm began to wreck the ship apart. It was being rocked back and forth viciously, as waves plunged against its sides, and started to destroy it. Water began to leak in the premises of the ship in an unspeakable fast pace, and this caused havoc on board. The passengers on the ship did not even have the chance to panic or think about how to save themselves because suddenly, the ship was wrecked in an instant.

They screamed in agony as they fell to their demise. Many tried to swim to the surface of the sea and save themselves, but their efforts were in vain. As Jungkook swam past the drowning humans, he saw their life flash before their eyes. And as the drowning humans lost their consciousness, they gasped in shock when they saw Jungkook, a merman going past them. It made them gasp in shock, and die quicker.

From the corner of his eyes, it was intriguing for Jungkook to see their reactions. He knew that if any humans ever saw him, they would be extremely shocked. But he never guessed that they would be shocked to the point where they would just end up floating mindlessly in the ocean with their eyes and mouth open. [1]

He was only focused on the insignificant characters for a few moments, because moments later, something else caught his attention.

It was a [h/c] female. She was dressed in extravagant pink robes, lightweight metal armour, and various expensive jewels. As she was floating to her demise with her eyes closed, parts of her robes were floating around her, and some of the jewellery on her wrist floated away into the sea.

She was a beautiful sight to behold, and Jungkook felt his breath hitch in his throat. His body acted on its own because instantly, he was swimming to her. He wrapped an arm around her form and under her breasts, before he started to swim up to the surface.

He noticed how her breasts felt soft against the skin of his arms, and it was a feature he had never seen before. His gaze focused on her breasts for a few moments, as his other hand trailed to one. He gave it an experimental squeeze, and his cheeks became tinted red. Subsequently to this, he felt sudden embarrassment overwhelm him – an emotion he rarely felt. Not wanting to become more flustered, Jungkook released his hold on her breast, and tightened his grip on her body.

He was not sure what was happening to him, but the ‘woman’ in his arm was doing something to him. He needed to get away from her as soon as possible.

Once Jungkook reached the surface of the ocean, he kept a stronghold on the woman in his grip, and swam towards the closest shore he knew of. After he reached the shore, Jungkook looked around for any potential threats that could pose a danger to him. When he saw that there was nothing and no signs of other living beings on the dry land, he roughly released the woman in his hands, and let her fall on the sand.

The [h/c] female, [Name] [Surname], laid sprawled on the sand. She was not moving, but in Jungkook’s eyes, she was absolutely gorgeous. Her robes were wet and stuck to her skin. Hence, it was transparent. As a result, her skin was visible, and the robe hugged all of her curves. Underneath the pale and silvery moonlight, her skin, glossed hair, and the jewels she wore, glistened. It was marvelling and captivating.

Jungkook was breathing heavily. If there was another merman in his place, they would have suffocated and passed away by this point. However, Jungkook was the King. The moment he inherited the crown, his powers manifested and he was granted new abilities. Seemingly, being able to breath outside of water for long periods of time was one of them.

Jungkook’s irises were dilated as his gaze was focused on the pretty woman before him. The more he stared at her, the stranger he felt.

He had the urge to do something strange. He did not know what it was, but there was something.

Instinctively, he dragged himself slightly on the sand so he was closer to [Name]’s form. He was leaning on his hands in the sand, hovering above her, and staring at her with a predatory gaze.

Then slowly, he started to lean forward. He closed his eyes and leaned down until his lips connected to her soft ones. As soon as this happened, Jungkook started to feel incredible and euphoric.

A golden warmth spread throughout his chest for a few moments, before it travelled up his body, and transferred from his mouth to [Name]’s, and travelled down to her chest. The warmth engulfed her being, and the skin over the location of [Name]’s heart, glowed.

The [h/c] female slowly started to hear her heartbeat pounding in her ears. She felt the strange sensation of a pair of hands roaming the  curves of her body, and a pair of lips kissing hers. This caused her to snap her eyes wide open in shock.

And when she did, there was nothing and no one there.

[1] Jungkook knows about humans and he had learned a lot about them from watching them. However, he doesn’t know how their anatomy works, so he doesn’t know that they can’t breath under water, and will die if they get no oxygen on time.

Part II | Masterpost

[rainbow-hatted1]

What Boredom looks like

1. You just opened up a web browser. What is the first site you visit?

https://www.reddit.com/r/interestingasfuck/

Yeah, that’s sort of my jam. Reddit in general but that is my go to.

vv more below if you wanna deep dive. vv

2. You just walked into a bookstore. What section do you go to first?

The local published section. If it’s a good bookshop they usually have one. Usually it’s poetry, or short essay compilations or local history books but I tend to like the offerings and you’re supporting people who don’t have a big platform yet.

Otherwise, comics and fantasy are my next first stops.

3. You are hanging with your closest friends. What are you most likely doing?

Lately, not much of anything. Arguing… not talking… depressing things.

Ideally, though, there’s a good meal. Either we’ve cobbled it together on our own or it’s a decent take out option and video/board games. Quidditch if it’s a nice day. Basically, where we can sit and bullshit and laugh a lot. That’s the best time with my mates.

4. You just turned your car on. What station is the radio tuned to?

The independent/alt/rock station. In spite making pop music myself I don’t listen to it a lot. Which is probably weird.

5. You have just woken up for the morning. What is the first things you do?

Try to go back to sleep.

6. Complete this phrase: You cannot buy happiness, but you can buy____.

Tacos

7. What would you do if you woke up as the opposite gender?

Probably touch my boobs entirely too much. Liz calls them boob checks… well, if they’re quick and random, this would probably be fondling.  I am ashamed of this answer but it’s likely what I’d do.

8. Are you more likely to cook for yourself or buy food from a restaurant?

I’m prone to laziness but I actually find cooking relaxing so cook for myself. Saves money too. It’s just a good practice to have in general.

9. If you had to lose one of your senses, which one would you rather lose?

Smell, probably. I enjoy food too much to lose taste. And between sight and hearing, I’d miss not having those senses and touch is just kind of important as a human being.  

10. If you could relive any one year of your life, how old would you be?

Dunno

11. Would you take a bullet for anyone you know?

A few someones

12. Would you rather be rich and dumb or poor and extremely intelligent?

Poor and intelligent. Better chances of bettering my situation with that one.

13. What TV character do you most relate to?

Sam Gardner from Atypical.

14. You just walked into a supermarket. What section do you first go to?

Produce. Yeah, you all thought I’d go for the bakery and desserts. Don’t lie.

15. Is sex before marriage wrong?

No. It’s human. So is waiting. It shouldn’t be as polarizing as it is. Sex is part of life and how you want to experience it is entirely up to you.

16. You just won the lottery. What is the first thing you do with your winnings?

Get a lawyer and not tell anyone I won. People get shitty when you have a lot of money. They expect you to make it rain and I wouldn’t. I’d also take the weekly installments. More money overall and you are far less likely to tank yourself with the winnings. Just saying.

17. If your best friend admitted that they have a crush on you, how would you react?

I would be awkward as fuck. Love him, not like that and he has a girlfriend so yeah… it’d be fucked up.

18. Will the USA ever have a female president?

At this point in time: no. Again, this is a polarizing question that shouldn’t be. A woman could run the country I’m not women in charge by that answer. Don’t read into it. I’m merely saying, that with the way the country appears to be currently they will not vote for that. I’m sorry. It’s stupid.

19. You are carpooling with your friends. Are you more likely to be the driver or a passenger?

Passenger. I don’t drive.

20. How short is too short for skirts and dresses?

I’m not ancient or wearing a skirt so I don’t think it matters, but I tend to prefer more modest options on girls.

21. If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, without any consequences, what food would you choose?

Pizza.

22. It’s Saturday night. What are you most likely doing?

Sleeping.

23. You go on a blind date. Your date is extremely beautiful and physically captivating, but you hate their personality. Would you want a second date?

No.

24. How strict should gun laws be?

I think Australia had the right reaction to a massacre

25. Would you rather be the worst player on the best team or the best player on the worst team?

Best player on the worst team. Hopefully, they wouldn’t resent me and we could have a good 90’s style underdog story.

26. How well do you work with others?

Not well.

27. You have the ability to cure only one fatal disease and eradicate it forever. What disease do you choose?

I don’t want that power. Either way people are gonna die and wonder why I couldn’t cure all cancer or something else that’s just as bad…and inevitably another disease will surface that’s worse. There will always be disease even if we don’t like it.

28. If you could go back to college and choose a different degree to study, would you?

Well, considering I’m not in college yet I can still change my mind on that one, but I probably wouldn’t. Care of Magical Creatures but I haven’t zoned in on the specific avenue I want to go in that field yet.

29. Where do you see yourself ten years from now?

Er… traveling the countryside looking for magical creatures and documenting them in the wild. It’d be cool if my friends joined once in a while.

30. Are you pro-life or pro-choice?

Pro-choice isn’t anti-life, for fucks sake people.

31. Would you attend a same sex wedding if invited?

Yeah. If my mates fell in love and get married, I’m gonna be at the party regardless of sexes involved.

32. So far, what has been the greatest day of your life?

The first time HM played to a sold out crowd. That was pretty shocking. We’ve done it since and Nik has carried on doing it on his own but that day was scary and humbling and epic.

33. Has anyone you know ever been arrested?

Yeah, wrongly so but they saw what they wanted and went that’s our guy. Luckily, he didn’t get sent away for good.

34. If it could be one season year-round, what season do would you want it to be?

Fall. But like warm fall not close to winter fall. That fall sucks.

35. What is your biggest regret in life?

Saying such shit things about Anna and Charlie’s mum because I was mad at him. We’ve never recovered from it and it was a stupid in the moment blind rage bullshit thing I can’t ever take back.

36. If you could bring one celebrity back from the dead, who would it be?

John Lennon, probably. But the thing is, not everyone is upset their deaths were untimely. That’s more the livings problem than the dead, I’ve come to learn.

37. What offends you the most?

When people assume how I’m feeling. I’m not exactly easy to read, I know that, and I have a hard time wrapping my own head around my thoughts and feelings. So when I am feeling something and someone says I’m feeling another way because my face doesn’t wash with an emotion or my reaction doesn’t match like it allegedly should it’s really upsetting to me and just makes things worse.

38. Would you rather have an ugly hairstyle or be bald?

Do what you want. It’s just hair

39. At what age did you have your first alcoholic beverage?

16. Yeah, I think that’s right.

40. What do you think happens to us when we die?

Ideally, you move on to another plane. Kind of like a multiverse but one for endings. For a bit you can linger between the here as we know it and there but eventually you either stay and become a ghost or a poltergeist (which depends solely on your continued mental state on the matter of your death) but most move on beyond the veil.

41. What do you think is the best way to quit smoking?

I don’t know.

42. If you could take home any one animal from the zoo, which animal would you choose?

A bear of some sort. Polar, Grizzly, Black…. Whatever they’ve got. Not all zoos have the same bears.

43. Were humans created or did we evolve from earlier species?

I’m gonna go out and say something that pisses people off but I don’t see why it can’t be both. Something came out of nothing which is creating, right? The act of creating something is taking elements and making them something or straight up creating an element. What did that, I don’t know. But at one point there was a creation moment. From there everything on this planet has changed and adapted to the situations and surroundings they came into. Life is change, you don’t change you can’t survive. So both. Both sound right to me.

44. What scares you the most?

Losing everyone I care about… and bugs. Fuck bugs

45. What personality trait turns you off the most?

I hate when people play dumb.

46. You got offered a job to do something you hate, but the pay will make you rich. Do you take it?

No.

47. If today you only had what you were thankful for yesterday, how much would you have?

Sadly, not very much probably.

48. How often do you get mad or upset at yourself?

Everyday.

49. If you could choose one celebrity to be your parent, who would you choose?

I’ll keep my parents, thanks but to answer the question: Reign. At least I’d still have family.

50. If you could only listen to one musical artist for the rest of you life, who would you be listening to?

I would probably choose not to listen to music after a bit. I like variety and I’m not always in the mood for an artist of one flavor but the Beatles? At least their breadth of music is pretty wide.

51. Have you ever used you cell phone while driving?

No

52. Has anyone you were close to die way too young?

Yes.

53. Is world peace possible?

No, I don’t believe it is. It’d be great if it could be. There’s no reason for all this hate but people are always going to clash. We get on for a bit and then boom, it’s done. Peace is an impossibility but we should still strive for it regardless.

54. You go on a blind date. You date is extremely ugly and physically appalling, but you are madly in love with their personality. Would you want a second date?

I don’t know. I want to say yes, be that guy who doesn’t care. Looks really are not everything but ultimately, you should be attracted to your partner. If you aren’t it isn’t likely to work even if their personality is the most beautiful thing in the world.

55. How did you discover that Santa Claus isn’t real?

My little brother told me and I was devastated.

56. Do you believe in God, or some form of higher deity?

I honestly want to but I have a hard time wrapping my mind around how things can be the way they are if a loving god is out there watching us. I think the Futurama episode where Bender gets life on his ass is a great example of how my brain wants to look at it.

And then I read the Bible and get to stories like Zechariah and I’m just left thinking that guy probably had a stroke while praying and the rest is a coincidence.

57. If you could save someone you deeply cared about, but it meant breaking a law, would you do it?

Fuck yes. Without hesitation

58. What is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done for money?

Sold my soul for a sickle once.

59. If you were to make a YouTube video about what you know most about, what would the subject be?

Magical Creatures. I could go on for a very long time about that topic.

60. What do you think is your greatest personality flaw?

I’m rigid. I have a hard time shifting directions when I get going.

61. If your friends spoke to you the way you speak to yourself, would you still want them as friend?

I haven’t got many actual friends so maybe. Better than being alone, I suppose.

62. Have you ever “woke up like this”?

No one has ever “woke up like this”. It’s a lie. It’s always a lie. Even if they look good, that caption shows intent and planning: don’t fall for it.

63. You got offered a job to do something you love, but the pay is one of the worst out there. Do you take it?

If I really fucking love it, yes. But I’m also in a position where I can have a shit paying or no paying job and basically be fine.

64. What do you think is your best physical feature?

My lips?

65. What do you think is your worst physical feature.

My nose is big.

66. Do you know anyone who has committed suicide?

Not suicide no. But I know people who have considered it. Glad they didn’t follow through.

67. What is the nicest thing you’ve ever done for someone you don’t know?

I dunno. I have a habit of giving my bus ticket away if it still has time on it. I know it’s not much but as for random acts of kindness that weren’t really put on display for charities or a fluff news story, that’s the one I’ve got.

68. Have you ever had a night’s dream come true?

No, can’t say that I have.

69. Would you reject a date offer from someone you didn’t like?

yes

70. Which do you think is worse: Failure, or never trying at all?

This is one of those what I say is not really what I do things. I think the second is worse but I often freeze when it comes to choices like this. When I’m by myself: I freeze.