#it would be fine if didn't have to do 2 hours of errands after work while cramping and bleeding

[qkopi]

LINK UP

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pairings: prowler! miles x fem! reader

cw: cheating, profanity, major toxicity, suggestive

summary: you loved your boyfriend miles, you really do. he was everything you could ask for; he was handsome, gentle, and very caring towards you like a good boyfriend should be… but there’s also times where he would cancel dates out of nowhere and that would leave you to be disappointed and go home bored. miles then tried to make it up to you by planning to hangout at his place this today, but things go sideways when his twin brother decides to take things into his own hands..

a/n: guys i don't condone to cheating, this was js an idea my friend told me and we got hyped😭btw spidey! miles will still be ‘miles' but prowler! miles will b named ‘milo’. and btw reader does not know that the boys r spider-man or the prowler‼️

pt 1 -> pt 2

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you knocked onto the door of the morales' household, being greeted by miles' mother with a happy smile.

"hola, cariño. please come in." she opened the door for you as you nodded with a smile, taking off your shoes before entering.

"is miles here?" you asked, walking towards his room.

“he said he was running some errands but don't worry, he'll be back." mrs morales reassured me.

"is miles here?" you asked, walking towards his room.

"he said he was running some errands but don't worry, he'll be back." mrs morales reassured me.

as you entered his room, you laid flat on his bed, a happy sigh leaving your lips since this was the first time in a month that you and miles has finally get to spend some time with each other. you then looked at the clock, 12:01.

"he should be back before 12:05." you mumbled as you took out your phone, scrolling through social media.

4 minutes have passed. miles wasn't here.

the clock hit 12:30, miles wasn't here and you already texted him, asking him where he is.

12:45, miles still wasn't here.

it was 1:15 when miles* mom came to check up on you, knocking softly on the door before opening it.

"cariño, is he still not here?" she asked with a frown, seeing you sit up from the bed from waiting.

"no, not yet mama morales." you shook your head with disappointment.

"ah, where is this boy when you need him." mrs morales grunted as she went to go find her phone, getting ready to scold her son, but when she tried calling him, miles wouldn't pick up the phone.

"i'm sorry, sweetie.. i tried but he's not picking up." mrs morales said as she leaned on the door, feeling bad since she knows how long you two have planned to meet up with each other.

“i have to go to work, y/n.. i wish i could stay." mrs morales continued as she looked at her watch.

"no, it's fine, please. i insist." you try to give her a warm smile to show that you weren't sad.

"aw, come here." she walked closer and gave you a hug as you hugged her back.

"trust me, when that kid comes back home tonight, i'll ground him for a month but he can only go out somwhere only if he's with you." she patted your back as you let out a chuckle.

"thank you, mrs morales." the both of you slowly pulled away as you gave her a light-hearted smile.

rio then started to grab her things as she made her way to the door. you also walked out of miles* room to greet her goodbye, standing around the living room area.

"if you're hungry, please grab something before you leave, y/n, alright?" she asked before leaving.

"of course!" you responded back.

after hearing the door close, a sigh left your lips once again as you looked around in the living room, feeling lonely.

you went back to lay in miles' bed, you waited for 2 more hours. it was 3pm. you had enough.

"i’ll just take food some other time." you mumbled in a monotone voice as you made your way back to miles’ room to grab you things.

as you turned around to leave miles' room, you didn't know you were greeted by a standing milo, who made you fall in front of his chest as he caught you just in time.

"falling for me already, mami?" he asked with a smirk as he raised his brow.

"haha.. very funny, milo." you said sarcastically as you got off him.

milo was miles twin brother. how did you tell them apart exactly? well: miles just kept his hair natural as milo had braids.

and why was he openly flirting with you when you were his brother's girlfriend? let's just say he had feelings for you before you and miles made it official.

you and milo were talking and flirting here and there but he never really made a move so you didn't either, until his brother came into the picture. milo was planning on asking you out but sadly, miles beat him to it first. milo loved his brother even if he didn't show it, so he just remained friends with you.

"so... miles canceled again?" milo asked, already knowing the answer, he just wanted to push your buttons.

"what do you think?" you responded back with a snarky tone.

"i'm telling you, ma. you chose the wrong twin.” milo said with a shrug.

"i'm doing fine with miles, milo.. i don't need anymore of your bullshit." you grumbled, trying not to play into his game.

“suit yourself, but you're gonna wake up some day feeling that you wasted your time on that no sabo headed ass kid when you could've had me."

"hmm. no wonder why miles is older than you, he's more wiser and mature and he wouldn't be saying this shit about his own brother." you rambled on sarcastically.

"oh you're getting personal now, huh? low blow, ma.” milo pretended to look hurt.

"whatever, milo." you rolled your eyes, softly pushing his chest to get through the door.

"just saying, i could treat you so much better." milo said with a cocky smirk as he looked at you while you were walking.

but that statement made you stop your tracks as you turned around to look at him.

"oh really? how would you do that exactly?" you challenged him, raising a brow.

"for starters, i would never cancel on you and let you look stupid out in public." milo said smugly, inching closer to you, placing a hand on the right side of your cheek and slowly pulling you face closer to his.

your breath hitched as you slightly flinched, wanting to move away from his hold but your legs refused to move you at all. milo noticed his effect on you and smirked.

"and, this." his tone shifted. he didn't allow you the time to think as he closed the space between. his lips gently pressed on yours in a quick yet provocative kiss.

you let out a tiny gasp after pulling away from the kiss, touching your lips as you were shocked of what had just happened.

‘i just kissed my boyfriend's twin brother.' you thought to yourself as you looked at milo with astonishment.

"you can deny it all you want, but we both liked that." milo said with a smirk. he was already getting ready to go for round two - but it was clear you needed a moment to register what happened.

before you could say anything, milo began to kiss you once again, making you drop your bag as he pushed you against the wall to deepen the kiss.

this time, milo didn't hold back. he was confident in his moves, in his ability to coax this kiss out of you. he had an aura about him - one that left you helpless to your own desires. your tongues locked in heated passion, moving in harmony as an intoxicating wave of desire slowly pulled you under.

suddenly, the doorknob on the front door begin to shake, making you both to stop kissing as both of your attention was both turned to the door.

"milo!" you whisper-yelled, getting worried of who might walk in. it might be their dad, their mom, or worse, it could be miles himself..

the moment they stopped kissing, milo realized the gravity of what was taking place. he knew that his next move would be a risk, but he decided to take it anyways.

"dont worry, ma." he said with a playful wink. “i can do this in silence." before you were able to object, he then shoved you into the bathroom, entering it after closing the door.

milo pushed you against the door, getting ready to devour you again. he placed one of his hands to the wall above your head, holding you in place as he had his way with you. as milo continued to kiss you passionately, his tongue was searching for entry. he was driven by an insatiable hunger, one that he could only fulfill on you.

"told you that we'll do it in silence, ma." he whispered into your ear. his breath was hot as he kissed your neck in the spot that was most vulnerable, before biting into it gently.

you bit your lip, trying to suppress your noises as you threw your head back, giving milo more access to your neck. you grabbed onto his shoulders as you were on the verge of letting out a tiny noise until you heard a familiar voice ring out in the hallways.

"milo! is y/n here?" miles yelled out as he entered the apartment.

fuck.

milo's eyes widened at the sound of his brother's voice. the situation was already complicated, he didn't need miles walking in on both of you in this position.

quickly, he pulled back and covered your mouth. he pointed to your lips, signaling for you to keep quiet. as miles footsteps came closer towards the bathroom, milo whispered in your ear one final time before heading out.

*i'll take care of this cabrón, just don't make a noise when you leave, ight?" milo whispered as he waited for a response. you nodded.

and just when milo was ready to distract his brother, he got ready to open the door but then he stopped, trying to close it slightly.

milo wasn't expecting miles to be right outside.

"well? was she here or not?" miles asked, getting a bit impatient.

milo quickly composed himself, as if he didn't just have a make out session with you a moment ago. he casually leaned against the door frame, putting up a front of casual conversation as miles question hung in the air.

"bro, she left like 2 hours ago." milo casually scratched the back of his head, still keeping you out his brother's line of sight as their conversation continued.

"ugh.. well, i know she's definitely pissed." miles groaned as he headed to his room to change.

"just text her an apology or sumn," milo shrugged. miles walked towards his room as milo let out a relieved sigh.

"we got lucky, ma," he whispered to you. “i gotta go bullshit my way into that clown. keep quiet, got it?"

you only nodded as milo left the bathroom, walking to miles’ bedroom and leaning against the doorframe. milo then began to distract his brother, making a way for you to escape the bathroom and leave their apartment without making a sound.

once you completely left the apartment, you let out a breath that you didn't even know you were holding.

"what the fuck.." you mumbled under your breath as you still tried to register of what was happening.

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’good work, ma.’ milo thought to himself. he had the dumbest grin plastered on his face as he watched you go. he then turned towards his brother.

"yo, bro." milo said, giving miles a friendly pat on the back.

"got any plans tonight?"

"well, i gotta go over to y/n's and apologize to her, but did you just have someone over?" miles smirked at his brother.

"whatchu mean?" milo asked. miles pointed to his own lips as milo went to a mirror, seeing a faint color of pink lipstick on his lips.

milo looked taken aback, as if he was caught red handed, but he still kept his composure.

"yeah, i did, actually." he admitted after a moment. "but we were just chilling, y'know? nothing serious." milo added, not trying to reveal too much.

"mhm.. lil bro's finally getting some!" miles teased milo, throwing an arm around milo's shoulder and bringing him slightly down to rub his knuckles on his head, knowing milo hated it whenever he did this.

"yeah, yeah, whatever, dumbass." milo pushed him away with a chuckle.

oh, this was going to be messy.

™︎ qkopi | tumblr

[agi-ppangx]

💭let me help you

pairing: bang chan x gn!reader

word count: 806

tags: non!idol au, gn!reader, angst, fluff, pre established relationship

warnings: hospital, broken leg, a bit of crying

author's note: hiii, i hope yall are doing fine!! wrote this pretty quickly and its totally not proofread, so please dont mind any typos and mistakes </3 feedback and reblogs highly appreciated 🫶🏽

you tried calling your boyfriend several times now and finally, after what feels like forever, you heard his voice. "channie! hi, um… look, i'm really sorry, but we have to cancel our date tonight…" you said with a pounding heart. you felt guilty, knowing that today was one of rare times when chan could wrap up his work earlier and spend some time with you. "everything alright? you sound worried" chan asked, concerned about your well-being. you started to panic a bit, not wanting him to worry about your problem. "yeah, it's nothing, i swear it's just-" "y/n, what's going on?" he interrupted you, clearly lost in your rambling. you sighed and mumbled "i'm at the hospital right now. but it's fine! really, i'm fine, just won't be able to go to the movies later". chan didn't respond for a while, but you heard rustling and the door closing. "which hospital?" he then asked, his voice shaking. you knew it was useless to argue with him and you told him the address. "i'll be there in 20, wait for me, okay?" chan stated and you hummed, ending the call.

you and chan have been dating for a little over 2 months and throughout this time you weren't able to go on many dates, since chan's job was quite time consuming and your schedules collided every time you wanted to go out together. and today was one of the rare times when you could meet up. you two planned everything a week in advance, chose a movie you were going to watch and the restaurant you were supposed to eat dinner after it. but you had so much to do today before the date and in a rush your feet slipped on the stairs, causing you to fall down and break a leg. you were in a hospital for a while now, nervously waiting for your doctor to carry out essential tests and put a plaster on your leg. it felt like hours and you didn't know how long it would all take.

chan arrived pretty quickly, bursting into the emergency room and looking nervously around it. when his eyes finally met yours, he sprinted to your side and took a better look. "what happened?" he asked, his voice quiet and unstable. "i… fell down the stairs this morning" you murmured, ashamed that a grown up person could be that clumsy. "i'm really sorry channie, i wanted to run errands before our date and i just…" you sighed, pointing to your leg resignedly. you mumbled a quiet "i'm sorry" once again and looked down to hide the tears that gathered in your eyes. after a while, chan finally spoke. "y/n, you don't have to be sorry, you did nothing wrong. i was just really worried about you and for the whole drive here i was praying for you to be fine" he said, placing his hand on your cheek and wiping the tears from your face. "does it hurt?" he then asked softly, although he knew the answer. "it does, so bad, and i don't know how long i have to wait for the doctor" you whispered, sounding defeated, and more tears ran down your face. he kissed your forehead and then got up. you didn't know where he was going, but soon you saw him talking to the nurses and to your doctor. you didn't hear the conversation, but you saw that chan was impatient, his jaw clenching and unclenching as he was speaking. he returned to you after a while with a smile and a soft "they'll take care of you now". then everything happened really fast, the nurse taking you to examine you and within an hour you were ready to leave with a plaster on your leg.

chan offered to give you a ride, helping you to get to the car. "you'll spend a few days at my place, okay? i'll take care of you" he stated and you looked at him. "chan, you don't have to, i'll be fi-" you started but he interrupted you, "baby, you know your place is too cramped and complicated for you to get around with crutches. please, let me help you". you sat in silence for a while when you suddenly asked "baby?". it took you off guard, being in a fresh relationship you two didn't really use affectionate names yet, but you liked it a lot. you saw chan's face become red like a tomato and you giggled to yourself. "fine, let's go to your place, baby," you grinned. chan smiled to himself and then there was a pleasant silence between you. you wondered how you got so lucky to have chan in your life - someone who treated you with care and love and was there for you for good and for bad.

[sluckythewizard]

Keep calm, and drink soda

[CW for blood and gore and vomit] takes place a day or two after emizel was sired. just two boys adjusting to a shift in their daily norms. would YOU drink your homies blood? still not used to writing fanfic so any and all advice IS appreciated. i hope u enjoy.

There were very few things that Soda enjoyed more than well, drinking soda. It was a hobby, an interest, a comfort. And by extension there were very few errands that Soda would look forward to more than the occasional soda run.

The gas station closest to the Demons hideout had stopped selling Faygo entirely about a month or two ago, and it was near impossible to find it anywhere else. The closest place was now this janky little Shell gas station, lovingly titled the Shady Shell, that thankfully sold more flavors than any of the other ones ever did.

It made the hour and a half walk here entirely worth it. Even if this side of town made his skin crawl. Normally he would ask someone to accompany him on this daring little quest, but everyone at the hide out tonight just seemed too tired, too preoccupied, too uninterested.

He knew not everyone really got the soda thing, but they were accepting of it for the most part. Soda is something that, clearly, Soda really loves, but he knew not everyone else was into it.

Which was fine, of course. They didn't need to get it. But, still, sometimes Soda found himself wondering how much of it was a bit, and how much was him.

Emizel gets it perfectly though. He would've been the first person Soda would ask to go on this soda run with him, but, well. He's been preoccupied too, with the whole vampire thing.

It's been a bit more than a day since Soda had last seen his close comrade. For a friend that he saw just about everyday, going without him this long left him feeling a little emptier.

That was fine, though. Emizel had shit he was working out, he had things he needed to do. It's not like he could go out in the day anymore, so of course Soda wouldn't be seeing him at all the usual times.

It was a lot of weird and heavy magical stuff, it made Soda think about those superhero shows. Where the hero needs to keep his identity hidden from everyone. Family especially. He knows how much of a piece of shit Emizels dad is, so he hoped that Emizels home life wasn't stirred up all stupid-like over this.

He hasn't told anyone else, about what happened that night. For the last 2 days, Soda would spend time with close friends and not let them know a thing about what happened to Emizel so, so recently. Why he's so suddenly absent, so distant, so.. off…

'Maybe his dad's just giving him a hard time', he would say, hoping to smother their questions. The less questions they ask, the better. At least until this vampire stuff gets figured out a bit more. Should Emizel wear a disguise when he goes out at night now? Just like a superhero? What kind of hero outfit would Emizel have anyways? Soda figured it would be something really cool.

If anyone could figure out a way to balance all this vampire stuff, and all the leaderly responsibilities that come with being the biggest dog in the Demons, it was Emizel for sure. That guy is so seriously cool.

He was sure this rough patch would even out, and they would weather the next rough patch together no problem. There was really nothing to worry about! All Soda has to do is stay positive, and well, drink soda.

As Soda walks quietly down the crumbling sidewalks of this dreary hive of strip malls and shops, he goes to pull his backpack around to his chest, fumbling with the zipper in the dark. Which was a little annoying, considering the tab of his zipper had fallen off forever ago. He really needed to get around to fixing this damn thing. Maybe another ziptie and a soda tab will do the trick.

Humid air hangs heavy in the night, the sidewalks still somewhat warm after a hotter day. The diesel-soaked air provided enough warmth on its own that Soda had considered taking his jacket off a few times, only for the occasional, annoyingly sharp and chilly breeze to brush by, reminding him to keep the thing on.

Tripping only once and only slightly on an uneven sidewalk, Soda manages to pull a bottle of Faygo from his backpack, a smile glowing on his face. Another short fight with the zipper seals up the bag, and he slings it over his shoulder again.

His flavor of choice tonight was actually the Red Pop, the tried and true, the absolute classic, one of the best Faygo flavors for sure.

But, this kind wasn't actually his favorite. Normally he would stock up on the cotton candy ones, but something about the last few days had him craving the red stuff.

Securing his backpack all the way, he goes to crack open the bottle. Just the clack and the hisssss of the fizzy drink were enough to lift his mood.

Not that his mood needed lifting or anything. Of course. Sure he missed his friend and sure he found himself wondering what he’s doing and where he is and if he's okay. Maybe sometimes he found himself wishing they talked about funeral plans more.

Emizel talked up all sorts of crazy funeral ideas for himself, usually involving the use of his dead body as an inconvenience for others. Outlandish and hilarious ideas, like filling it with explosives and tossing it into a busy road. But what would he want seriously? What would Soda ever do if he just stopped showing up one day?

He had to swallow down all these unnecessary anxieties, so he took a swig of his soda. Sweet, bubbly, comforting. He felt better already! Just stay positive, and drink soda..

It was a lovely night out, and he didn't come all this way planning on letting it go to waste. There was a place he was heading towards, a particular alleyway in this particular place that led off to a particularly tall concrete ledge.

 It was a run-down little space, littered with trash and shitty trees and those bushes with just too many goddamn ants in them. But the view was fairly nice, overlooking a massive deformed intersection. A particularly stupid one, at that; about 3 times a week you could witness a gnarly crash at this spot. Soda always heard people saying that LA folks can't drive, but he was just starting to figure that maybe no one can drive.

That was the place he really wanted to go to enjoy this soda, and he wasn't too far off from it. Just a few more blocks, and he would be there.

Oh wait, didn't he still have a bag of chips in this backpack somewhere? Hell yeah, he couldn't wait to sit down and relax with a good soda, a good snack, and a good view of the night.

Living as a Demon had its fair share of stresses. He felt lucky to have this life, but he knew well that it could be better. That not everyone has to worry about survival the way they do. That not everyone gets injured on the regular and not everyone has to worry about being sick and never getting better.

Living is hard. But it's finding the small moments of joy that make it all worth it. Dying would be scarier anyway. He didn't want to die, and he felt glad to feel so confident in that nowadays.

The sudden   THUNK  of something slamming into the ground just a block away from him, jolts him out of his thoughts, all his gears screeching to a halt as he freezes in place. What the fuck was that?

It looked like a person, laying flat on the ground with only their head and shoulders peeking out of the alleyway ahead. Fuck. He hated this side of town..

Anxiety churns in his stomach as he debates just turning around, but the way the victim reaches an arm out, attempting to crawl away; it made his heart ache aswell. he's no goddamn fighter, but he couldn't just leave someone like th-

The body is suddenly yanked back into the alley, snatched at a startling speed. It didn't feel exactly real, how could something vanish so fast? It reminded Soda of something from a horror movie, or whatever. What the fuck was that??

His foot takes a step forward, before the rest of his body notices its rebellion and locks down again. Was he seriously going to investigate that? He could just walk away and take another alley. But that was the one he was supposed to turn down! All the other alleys are either walled off or gated off and he wasn't about to go climbing over a damn wire gate. His soda would get too shaken up! Fuck!

Another foot goes in for another step forward. He's gotta get the fuck out of here. He could hear more commotion in the alleyway, a scuffle, a skirmish. He could hear someone cursing through a choked breath. A loud and nauseating crack echoes out from the alley, and yet, Soda takes another step forward.

This was stupid, he shouldn't be getting tangled up in someone else's business. What if something happened to all this soda?

Thankfully, it was that thought that actually got him to pause, and take in a deep breath. It wasn't worth it, maybe he should head straight home.

Atleast, that was the thought his heart and mind were about to agree on, until a particularly familiar grroowwwwlll bleeds out from the alley.

Emizel?

All reason immediately evaporates as Soda makes that connection in his head, stepping right up to the corner of the brick walls, and peering around to investigate.

There was a body on the floor, face down in a puddle of red, head split open in a way that reminded Soda of a smashed watermelon.

But standing over that body, was the familiar, blackened coat, and short blonde hair, of Sodas closest comrade, Emizel.

Despite the carnage on the floor, Soda couldn't help the smile that lights up his face. That was Emizel! That was his boy!

But before he could get over just how happy he felt to see his best friend, something else caught his eye. Movement, behind the dumpster closest to the vampire boy. A person, rising out from the shadows with a glinting baseball bat clutched fiercely in their hands.

"Oh fuck, look out!" Soda speaks up, and Emizels gaze immediately clicks over to him, silencing Soda with just that startlingly red stare.

He had forgotten just how uneasy those red eyes made him..

The attacker, silent and professional, rushes up behind Emizel and CRACKS the metal bat downwards onto his blonde head, the sound ringing out like a  gun shot  in that dark little alleyway.

Soda cringes from just the sound of the impact, but was amazed to find that the bat had warped under the force of it!

The attacker hardly had a chance to process his mangled weapon before Emizel whips around to retaliate.

It looked like he had just swung his hand at his opponent, so the way a shower of red spills outward from the slash, catches Soda completely off guard. The monster boy had cleaved an excruciatingly massive gash up from the attackers right hip, to his left shoulder, the slice spewing with scarlet.

 It wasn't until Emizel had pulled back his arm, that Soda could process the way it had darkened with more than just blood, distorted into an odd, spear-like shape.

The victim hardly had a chance to yelp before that blade swoops up into his chest at the speed of a snapping bear trap, plunging through meat and bone with disturbing ease, and forcing blood and viscera to erupt outwards. The red patters down onto the concrete behind, the sound similar to rain...

With another low, inhuman snarl, Emizel brings the twitching, dying body closer, until that signature squish of teeth sinking into fresh meat bleeds outward into the space.

What a disgusting sound, Sodas first instinct was to simply avert his eyes, but as the sound persists, he resolves that he has to do something.

He finally steps out into the alley, and speaks.

"Hey ma-"

He could hardly get two words out before Emizel suddenly rips its teeth away from its victims throat, tearing out a hefty chunk of jellied meat, and slamming the remaining fodder onto the concrete floor.

It immediately whips around to stare down Soda, red eyes glowing with reflected light, and with hardly a chance to process the moment-

-It's immediately right infront of Soda.

A gasp lurches from Soda's lungs as he almost stumbles back in shock. How was Emizel so fucking fast?

Other than that single step back, Soda was frozen in shock, his tongue buzzing with the physical pain of such a startling jolt. 'White boy jumpscare' is something that came to mind, but while usually such a thought would evoke some sort of laugh from Soda, this time it offered no such comfort. Okay maybe it did a little.

Emizels snarling face was only inches away from Sodas. Its eyes were wild and unnatural, teeth menacingly sharp and reddened with so much fucking blood. It was everywhere, coating most of his face, smothering his shirt and his coat, and absolutely choking the air with its thick, metallic stench.

Soda would gag if he felt he was safe to even move. He felt like he was locking eyes with that of a creature, something he would only ever see in his nightmares or in scary movies. But it was real. Those monsters are real. And his best friend is one of those monsters. His bestest friend in the world...

His mind was skewered on that unnatural glare, completely frozen with anxiety. Stalling too hard to come to a proper conclusion, Soda instead falls back onto what Soda does best.

"H-hey man... You want some soda?"

He very gently presses the opened bottle of Faygo into Emizels chest.

The two boys stand there for a moment, locked in a tense, silent pause, before the monster boy finally peels its gaze down to the bottle.

It's quiet, for a few seconds, the gears turning in its head. Until the monster blinks, and its eyes clear, and Emizel processes the sight of the bottle.

"Oh, fuck yeah dude, is that the Candy Apple Faygo? Man, that stuffs my favorite!" Emizel smiles as he goes to accept the bottle, and immediately takes a massive swig.

Soda tries to disregard the way his hands were still shaking. "Uh, n-nah man, its just Red Po-"

The words are bit off as Emizel suddenly retches, a heavy flood of red blood and red Faygo spewing out onto Soda, as the vampire boys body entirely rejects the fizzy drink.

The shock of getting fucking projectile vomited on had snapped Soda out of whatever daze he was just in, and it seemed to snap Emizel out of it too. Soda backs up with a groan, looking down at all the blood and bile and pop on his shirt and coat.

"Ohhh fuck dude, what the hell??" He cringes, not even wanting to try smearing any of it off with his hand.

Emizel was coughing, still holding out the Faygo bottle, but hunched over as his body dared to convulse again.

"Ohhhhhh fuck, ohhooohhh fuuuuucckkk" he grumbles towards the floor "Fuuuck I’m sorry dude, I don't know what fuckin- oohhhgg shit,” He coughs and groans,  offering the bottle back to Soda.

Soda was still staring at his messied coat with a displeased grimace, but looking up to meet Emizels eyes...

There was a guilt on Emizels face that Soda didn't see too often, and it helped wash away that irritation he felt. This sucked, but Emizel was probably going through a lot more. 

“It’s, uhm.. don't, don't worry about it, man..” Soda decides to reassure him, offering a sympathetic smile, and a hand on Emizels shoulder, as his comrade spits out the remaining blood and bile.

"Fuckin hell… I’m uh, I'm sorry about your shirt, man."

"What? Nahh it's okay man, don’t worry about it." Soda shrugs, taking the Faygo bottle back. "I mean, are you okay man? That uh.. looked like a pretty crazy fight."

Emizel was rubbing his eyes, smearing more blood across his face as he seems to be collecting himself. he spares a glance back at the carnage behind him.  

"Ah.. yeah.. I thought I uh.. I thought I saw that one fucker from uh. That one night. Yknow, the one that uh.." He snaps his fingers, as if trying to summon back the memory. "Vampire bitch... Anyway after that I just kind of, uh.."

He seems to space out again as he looks around. It was as if he was just woken up from a deep sleep, like he was certain he had just known what he was doing, but found the dream escaping him. "I guess I just.. went crazy on these guys. I dunno, they're Fangs anyways." he finally shrugs it all off, but Soda still felt unsatisfied by the answer.

"Oh.. huh…” is the only response he manages to scrounge together. Sure they were Fangs, but did they really deserve.. all that? It just seemed a bit brutal, even by Emizels standards.

He found his eyes wandering over to the split-open head. It was mostly red and bloody, but even in the dark, he could still make out some of the finer details of the gray jelly seeping from the gash. A human brain. He wondered if his own brain looked the same on the inside..

“So what are you doing out here, man?” Emizels question helps Soda pull his eyes away from the gore, instead looking over to his bloodied comrade.

Emizel looked messy and even exhausted, but his drowsy gaze was focused on Soda with a worried expression. 

“Oh, uh, yknow, just a soda run. Decided I would stock up on some Faygo from the Shady Shell.” Soda shrugs, his eyes flickering down to the opened Faygo in his hand. The top was covered in regurgitated blood. unnaturally blackened blood…

“Are you.. okay, by the way? Other than the whole..” Soda gestures vaguely at the gruesome crime scene. “Are you hurt?”

The question has Emizel pausing to consider. He straightens his back and stretches his arms, as if trying to detect any pain from any possible injury. Nothing seemed to be bothering him though, and after a second, he decides to shrug.

“Nah, I'm all good.”

“Oh.. That's good, I uh…” Soda found himself looking over Emizel aswell, searching for any wounds the monster boy might be simply disregarding, as he often does.

There was a fairly gnarly gash on his shin..

“Hey uh, I was actually gonna go hang out by the ledge down that way. Yknow, the one with the funny intersection.” Soda says, gesturing off towards where he intended to go. “Wanna come with?”

Emizel looks back that way, before turning back to Soda with a big smile on his face. 

“Oh hell yeah I do! I love the funny intersection!” he starts to walk down the alley, about to step over the body of the broken skull, when Soda speaks up.

“Uh, hey, shouldn't we uh.. Do something about the.. uh..” He waves a hand over towards the bodies, trying not to look directly at them. 

Emizel spares the corpses an inconvenienced glance, and a sigh, but ultimately shrugs them off. “Ehhh I'll just dump 'em in a dumpster again.. That's what I've been doing anyway.”

“And you're not worried about, like, anyone finding them?”

Soda anxiously watches on as Emizel paces around the body with the torn-out throat, licking the blood from his own mouth. Was his tongue always that long and pointed? That's neat, and normally Soda would point it out, but he was a bit.. preoccupied right now 

“Nahh not really. I haven't had anyone bother me at least.. Anyone been bothering you?” Emizels eyes finally flick back over to Soda. 

“Nah, I'd say things are actually more lax than usual. Anything that would end up being trouble’s been pretty much crushe- er, killed- destr- stamped out, by uh, by you.” Sods was cringing with every attempt to find a word that didn’t make his stomach turn, but Emizel didn’t seem to notice or mind.

Emizels eyes were currently a bit more focused on the body laying before him. He had that weird look on his face again… 

“Uhh, yeah, yeah that's good that uh, no troubles coming back to you guys…”

There’s a moment of quiet between the two as Emizel stares at this corpse, and Soda was about to open his mouth to fill the silence, but Emizel speaks up instead.

“Hey uh, why don’t you go ahead of me? I’ll uh, I'll meet you at the place.” He suggests, pointing vaguely off down the alley, but not removing his eyes from the kill. 

Soda certainly hesitates, his eyes narrowing before he even forms a thought. He opens his mouth to object, but then his eyes flicker back towards the body.

“Are you gonna eat this one too?”

The question leaves Sodas mouth as soon as it comes to mind.

Emizel pauses, and considers, before giving a shrug. “I don't see why not. Perfectly good blood.” He reaches down to grab his kill by the shirt, the one with the split open head. As the corpse rises from the concrete, gray matter drips and sloughs from the crack in its skull. Once again, Soda felt the need to look away, and yet his stupid eyes remained fixated on the horrendous sight. Emizel looks over the spilling brain of his meal, licking his lips curiously. “Dude, what do you think would happen if I ate his brain?” Emizel asks, looking back over to Soda with a wild, bloodied smile. Something about that look made Soda shiver, but.. Not really in a bad way… “Uh, I.. Dunno…. Eating a persons brain is how you get like, mad cow disease right? But you might also be immune to disease.. Are you immune to disease?” “Uhhh, I don't know yet actually. I'm still figuring out how much of this is like video games,” Emizel says, rubbing the back of his head as he idly sways the body of his kill around, watching the blood and gore drip and drop from its broken head. “Eh, I'll chance it later.” Without another word or thought, Emizel goes to sink his teeth into the shoulder of his kill, a pleased growl radiating from him as the blood gushes around the bite. More fresh blood upon less fresh blood upon old blood upon older blood. Just so much fucking blood. Soda thought he was used to seeing blood, but this… this was just egregious. Was he really starting to get used to this? It’s just blood after all, and it’s not from his comrades, so it's… fine… He finally manages to pull his eyes away from the gruesome sight of Emizel feeding, but his eyes instead wander down to the blood on his own shirt. Emizels blood was strange, darker than usual, and carrying a different scent. Something about the smell of his blood was more savory, more appealing than the standard metallic miasm. His shirt was smothered in it, his jacket was coated in it, and his opened bottle of Faygo was also splattered with the deep red ichor. Ink swirls within the bottle of red fizzy, spreading out into all sorts of odd patterns. It was a lot of blood. He was certain a lot of it came from however many people Emizels been feeding on. With how much hes been terrorizing the Fangs in just the last few days, and with how nonchalantly he feasts on his kills, who knows how much blood hes actually ingested… Soda swirls the bottle, watching the blood inside thin out into strands, dancing within the bubbly soda as they gradually dissipate, fully assimilating into the drink. A bad idea chews at the back of his head… The sound of ripping flesh once again knocks at Sodas head. He doesn’t look up this time, but he knew Emizel was just playing with his food again..  Did blood taste good to a vampire? Did some blood taste better than others? What did Sodas blood taste like? What did Emizels blood taste like? There's a visceral snap of something among the chewing and ripping, very clearly a bone or a joint snapping out of place. It made Soda shiver a little. When did his heart start pounding? There's an animal standing only 8 feet away from him, feeding on its kill. That animal is a person, and so is its kill. He wanted to know what vampire blood tasted like, but he already knew what human blood tasted like. It hung so densely in the air, he could feel it forming a vile film over his tongue. The blood of a person just like him. Eaten by an animal that eats people.  All this stress was no good. This bile rising to his throat was no good. This creeping anxiety was no good. He's friends with an animal that eats people. Would it eat him? This weird feeling was no good. Maybe it will never eat him. But it needs to eat people. This worry was no good. He needed to wash this awful taste from his mouth, replace it with something sweeter. He needed to keep his head clear enough to be there for Emizel when he needed to be. He needed to hold a light to these shadows. And he needed to stay positive, and drink soda. He takes a swig of the open Faygo bottle.

[skzhocomments]

Mafia Book #2 - PART I - The Black Iris - Chapter 8 - The bad guy

Story masterlist - please consult it for the summary of the story, trigger warnings etc.

General masterlist

Wattpad | AO3

Chapter 7 | PART II - The Withered Rose

---

PART I - THE BLACK IRIS

Chapter 8 - The bad guy

chapter word count: 4k words

~10 hours before flying to Italy~

~Iris' POV~

"You finished packing?" Chris asked without raising his gaze from the newspaper in his hands. We were both in the kitchen; I was making a coffee, and he was waiting for everyone to come back from whichever errand they were on.

"Yea. All done. Why are you reading the newspaper?"

"Sometimes enemy gangs organise rebellions and form alliances by using keywords in the columns."

"No way!" I exclaimed.

"Yes way. Look, this one for example might sound normal to the general public."

He handed me the newspaper where a column was highlighted.

~

"Monthly gardeners meeting: Seeking passionate rose gardeners.

Would your heart bloom along the red roses? Would you find joy in discussing this passion among other gardeners?

If so, contact us at X5DK20 and inquire about our monthly meetings."

~

"This... makes no sense."

"It's the perfect advertisement. A person with no interest in gardening wouldn't even pay it any mind, let alone read it carefully enough to figure out it's a sham. Someone who would actually care about gardening would just call and they'd be told it's not available."

"But... what? I don't get it. How would you know...?"

"Why don't you give it a try?" He pointed to my mobile phone that was lying on the table screen down. "Call and see what they say."

I grabbed it reluctantly and dialled the number, and someone responded after a few rings.

"Hello, I saw an ad in the newspaper about a monthly gardeners meeting?"

"Yes, thank you for calling, could you please tell us the three most important roses for any garden?"

"Three most important roses?" I look at Chris, who just shrugged and chuckled.

"We are sorry ma'am. It appears all the spots for the meeting have been occupied. Thank you for your interest." And with that, they hung up.

"See?" Chris was still chuckling.

"I'm super confused right now."

"There used to be a powerful Mafia called The Scarlet Rose. They've been trying to revive it for some time."

"Oh, didn't you mention it before? The woman you loved was part of it, right...?"

He nodded. "We've been trying to find all the people who want to bring that mafia back, but we haven't had too much success yet. When you're back from Italy, you have to get to work too." He smiled, and I chuckled.

"Of course. Han taught me a lot. I will help him."

"Good. By the way, Minho has one last meeting to finish up all the details for the shipment, and said he'll meet you at the airport. Since I.N is the only one here with nothing to do, he's gonna take you."

I nodded. I've never actually spoken to I.N until now, so I bet the three-hour long trip to the airport will be really fun.

~

A few hours later, an uncertain knock on the door, barely audible, took me out of my thoughts.

"We should get going. Ready?" Jeongin asked as soon as I opened the door.

I nodded and he stepped in the room uninvited, grabbing the two suitcases.

"Wait, let me-"

"That's fine." He shrugged me off and brushed over me, carrying both suitcases down the stairs. When we reached the car, he put everything in the trunk and hopped in the driver's seat, without paying me any mind.

I settled myself in the passenger seat next to him and he turned on the radio and started to drive without saying anything to me.

The airport was pretty far away, and after a little while of going through fields and forests, the road became quite familiar, but it was hard to tell.

"Oh, I think I recognise this place." I started, and eyed Jeongin, but he didn't show anything on his face.

"Really?" He asked drily.

"Yea, I believe this is where you've buried Emilia, right?"

He side-eyed me and hummed a bit.

Something seemed off, for some reason. Was it his mannerisms that were sending alarm bells to my brain?

"Chris told me you don't go there that often."

"Mhm."

"Too bad we don't have enough time, we could've paid her a visit." I pressed further, but he just shrugged.

Something about his indifference made my mind uneasy.

"I love that you buried her next to that large chestnut tree. It's really beautiful."

"Thanks."

I froze.

Jeongin buried her alone.

He never comes to her grave.

But still, he loved her as much as Chris.

Something doesn't add up.

Why doesn't he remember what the place he buried her looks like?

"Except there's no tree." I whispered and looked at him uneasy, and he gulped.

"It's been a long time since I've been there." He replied quietly.

Still, it didn't add up. You don't forget shit like this, especially since it's a defining event that builds you as a person. Burying the one you love is traumatising enough to make you remember every fucking small detail.

He kept silent the rest of the ride and I was deep in thought, trying to make sense of the newly found information. Jeongin was behaving too weird, and maybe other people wouldn't have noticed, but I spent many years observing mannerisms, and I couldn't help but notice the way he leaned back in his seat and the strength with which he held the wheel. Also, he kept tapping his index finger on the wheel and he seemed tense. Actually, he seemed like he tried not to seem tense.

Jeongin loved Emilia.

He was the last person to see her alive, and he buried her on his own.

He never comes to her grave. Moreover, he doesn't remember what that place even looks like.

And then, the penny dropped, my mind suddenly becoming clearer.

He never comes to her grave

Because she's not there.

Jeongin pulled into the airport's parking lot and took off his safety belt, and as he was preparing to get out of the car, I decided to speak up.

"She's not dead, is she?"

He stayed silent.

My breath became ragged.

"You never buried her. It's an empty grave." It felt like the start of a manic episode, and I wanted nothing more than to drive back to her grave and start digging, to check myself if there really isn't anything buried in there.

He looked at me sharply, his brows furrowed.

"What makes you say that?"

"Jeongin, don't play dumb."

He started trembling slightly, but tried to keep his composure.

"That's why I didn't want to speak to you... fuck."

He cursed, and I stood silent, watching him. When his eyes met mine, he let out another curse, then spoke.

"I dug a grave for her..."

"But she's not dead."

"I don't know..."

"Jeongin-"

"Chris can't know about this. He can't. I promised her-"

"He won't. But I need you to walk me through what happened. What really happened."

Jeongin shook his head and closed his eyes. It was obvious that this was hard on him as well.

"I-" Just as he started to talk, a knock on our window interrupted us. Minho grinned happily and opened my door, cupping my cheeks and pecking my lips.

Fucking timing.

"How's my favourite girl doing? Ready to go to Italy?"

"... yes, I'm ready." I replied, reluctant to get out of the car. Still, I got out and retrieved the two suitcases from the trunk, and Minho and I started walking towards the entrance.

I threw Jeongin one last glance, and he nodded briefly to signal goodbye. I cursed in my head more than ever, because I had Jeongin, and I would've found out every last piece of this mystery if Minho hadn't come at that exact same time.

We went inside the airport and passed through security check, and we hopped on a plane one hour later. Minho slept the whole flight, getting back his missed night's rest while he was away to figure out how the shipment to Italy was going to happen, and I was deep in my thoughts, knowing that Jeongin's secret had the power to either drive Chan crazy, or turn him completely mad.

I wasn't sure what to do with this newfound information. Actually, I wasn't sure if I should do anything at all, or just keep silent and pretend I've never learnt of this horrible misfortune. The only thing that was certain, though, was that I needed to tell Minho as soon as possible, because this shouldn't be my burden to bear alone, and then we'd figure out what to do, together.

~

~6 days later~

~third person POV~

"Honey, I'm home~" Minho sang while opening the door to Iris' and his holiday home. It was a small cottage on the outskirts of the town; it had a beautiful garden full of flowers, signalling an early beginning of spring.

The temperature wasn't too bad either. Quite warm, Iris would say, as she basked under the sun's warm rays, smelling the sweet fragrance of lilies and daffodils. Except she couldn't exactly enjoy it because she's been worried sick.

"You're home? Minho, is that seriously what you're telling me after almost making me have a heart attack?! I thought something happened to you!"

"Well, nothing happened! I'm here in one piece! See? Both legs, both arms, 20 fingers, all teeth!" He showed Iris each body part, chuckling a bit at his lover's worried expression.

"Minho!"

"Aww, not even married yet and she's already nagging me!" He joked again, pinching Iris' cheek, but the girl wouldn't budge. She was already wary of being left at home to wait for him while he goes alone to finish up the trade, and after waiting for him for a few days, agonising about what he could be doing or where he's at, this indifferent attitude of his really pissed her off. He noticed it as well, so he quickly changed his stance, and tried to emphasise again that he's well and nothing happened. "Come on, doll, I'm truly fine. Don't you think I'm even more handsome now that you haven't seen my face in 6 days?"

"That's not funny." She furrowed her brows. "You said you'll be gone for a day. It's been 6. I thought you were dead."

"Iris... look, it took a bit longer than expected because one of our-"

"-shipments got caught at customs." She cut him off. "Yea, I know. Chris told me, after I called him 100 times to see if he knew anything."

"Woah, straight to the boss, I see!" He gasped. "I'm truly sorry for worrying you, I didn't mean to. My phone died and I forgot to bring the external charger. Amateur mistake."

"Did no one have a fucking charger over there?"

"We were in an old mill. No electricity whatsoever, and no one was allowed to leave until the issue's been sorted out."

Iris stood silent, so Minho wrapped his arms around her, trying to comfort her. It was obvious she was still quite upset, but she was also relieved to see him alive.

"You can't die before we get married." She whispered, and he chuckled.

"Can I die after, then?"

"No. You can't. You're forced to grow old with me, to get wrinkles and become ugly."

"I will never become ugly." He retorted.

"And I will never become a young widow. And you are never going alone again."

"Okay love. I'm sorry." He put his hands on her face and pecked her nose. "Shall we go get married, then?"

Minho grabbed Iris' hand and took her to the garden, collecting a couple of flowers and improvising a bouquet. Then, he took her to a small arch made of green leaves and branches in the cottage garden where three people were patiently waiting for them.

"A priest?" She whispered, shocked. Neither of them was religious, but Minho wanted to do this by the book; he talked to the town's priest and even hired two random people to be their witnesses. "When did you even arrange this?"

"Surprise!" He chuckled. "We're doing this right. Except for the giving away part, because I'm not letting a random stranger give you away to me." He muttered quickly, and they both walked to the arch, holding hands.

The priest then began the short ceremony, and Iris could barely hold in her laughter, because everything was in damn Italian, which she couldn't speak at all. Sure, she knew her "Ciao"sand "Grazie"s, but other than that, she could only guess what the dude dressed in white was talking about.

When the moment came for them to say their "I do's and kiss, both felt the happiest in the world.

~

"I'm freaking starving. Maybe we should head to the town and grab a bite." Minho spoke, cuddled up to the crook of his now-wife's neck.

"No mood for cooking today?" She chuckled and gently petted his hair.

"No, I wanna rest up a bit." 

"So let's go get lunch, hm?"

They slowly got dressed and decided to walk until the centre of the town and enjoy the sun for a bit more until they had to go back. They had a few days of paradise left, but Minho still had to go back home and give Chris all the important documents and intel regarding the trade, and other possible expansion plans throughout Europe. Iris also wanted to get to work, to prove herself somehow that she could truly be part of Stray Kids, not just as Minho's wife, but also as a valuable asset. This didn't mean that she wouldn't wish she had more time on her honeymoon with Minho.

They sat down outside at a small metal table in front of a little restaurant, one of the few in town, and sipped on a hot coffee while waiting for their meal to arrive.

~Iris' POV~

It was truly relaxing to just sit like this and watch the people in this town go by with their daily lives. Some people were sitting around tables, just like Minho and I, drinking lemonades and smiling ear to ear, or laughing while sharing stories; other people were hurrying to work (or so I assumed), others were already working, like the server who just brought us two drinks we decided to get as desserts.

The street itself was pretty. Despite this being a small town, people were very civilised; there was no trash on the ground, the antique buildings were taken care of well, and the centre had it all: a few restaurants, a flower shop, a bookstore, a souvenir shop and a mini market. Nothing was missing.

"Oh?" I tilted my head after noticing a little girl running out of the flower shop.

"What is it?" Minho smiled.

"That little girl there is soooooo cute!" I exclaimed and squirmed with happiness. "Her hair is so pretty and curly! Don't you think so?" I asked, and Minho turned around briefly to see the girl I was pointing to.

"Oh my, yes, she's so cute! Should we go back to our house and make one?"

"Minho!" I playfully slapped his arm.

"What?!"

"Do you think it's okay for her to be alone like that on the street?" I frowned. "Oh, nevermind, her mother is apparently getting her back."

After saying this, I diverted my attention to the paper straw in the lemonade, while Minho turned around to watch the scene unfold.

Damn, I fucking hate paper straws.

"Iris." Minho said, and I raised my gaze to notice he seemed distressed all of a sudden.

"Is anything wrong?" I asked, my heart starting to beat out of my chest.

"... can you please go to that flower shop and get yourself a bouquet of whatever flowers they have?" He asked in a breath, and I didn't understand what got him so agitated. Still, I nodded unsurely and grabbed the money he handed to me and made my way to the flower shop.

~

"Ciao!" The woman at the register spoke cheerfully.

"Hello." I replied and smiled.

"Oh, a foreigner." The woman laughed.

She seemed around my age, and was wearing a long, black fitted dress and a bright red lipstick. She was beautiful, and oddly familiar. It felt like I saw her somewhere before, but I wasn't entirely sure...

"Yes, you as well?" I laughed back, when her daughter made her way towards me, her soft curls bouncing up and down with each of her little steps. "Oh my, you have such an adorable daughter!"

"Thank you, she's almost 3, and a menace!"

"Is that so? Are you making mommy upset?" I pinched her cheeks, and she chuckled.

"So, would you like to buy some flowers?"

"Oh, yes, I'd like a-"

"-bouquet of white lilies, please." Minho's voice came from behind me, cutting me off.

"Minho?" I turned my head around, and everything happened in a flash: the woman ran towards her daughter and grabbed her from me, and Minho reacted immediately as well, trying to get between me and her.

I don't know who was faster, but the next thing I remember is feeling a powerful blow to the back of my head.

~

Ugh... this hurts...

I slowly tried to open my eyes, but the pounding headache in my head was making it hard to.

"... and that's how I ended up here." A voice I didn't recognise spoke.

Ah... it's probably the woman...

"Fucking hell..." Minho replied.

"I hope you understand why I can't come back with you, Minho. I'm sorry."

What's going on...?

"No, Emilia, I'm the one who's sorry. I know you probably hate Chris. Hell, you probably hate me, and everyone else, but-"

"Yes, you're right. I fucking loathe all of you."

"Some tea?" A man whose voice I also couldn't recognise asked.

"What, are you some sort of fucking housewife?" The woman spat.

"You and that rotten mouth of yours. What if Ivy hears you?"

I finally managed to sit up straight, massaging the back of my head with my hand.

"Iris, you're awake!" Minho sat up from his chair and ran up to me. I glanced around the room and saw the woman sitting at a round table and sipping tea. Her back was straight, her red lips stained the coffee cup, and her dress reached her ankles still. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine... my head hurts a bit... what happened?"

"Emilia hit you." He sighed.

"Sorry 'bout that!" Emilia chuckled slightly.

"Wait, Emilia, as in-"

"Chan's lover." Minho clarified, and my eyes grew wide. I couldn't believe it.

I already knew she was still alive, but what were the chances of us bumping into her in a random small town in Italy?

"Am I that popular?" She chuckled. "Nice to meet you, Minho's wife."

"I have a name." I stood up and headed to her, handing my hand out for a shake. "Iris."

Emilia's gaze was so sharp, I was afraid it would cut, and the darkness in her eyes was so deep, it was hard to read her.

"Emilia, but oh well, you know that already."

"I do. So, this is where you were hiding." I glanced around the room again; simple décor, and a few photographs of her daughter – Ivy? – on display.

Minho looked at me with confusion, and Emilia's smile dropped from her lips.

"What do you mean?" She asked quietly.

"I mean – I was really wondering where you were, after I found out that the pretty grave Jeongin dug for you is empty."

The room grew silent.

"Iris... what are you talking about?" Minho asked, as if hoping he heard me wrong. "Did you... know about this?"

I sighed.

"I found out the day we left to Italy and was planning to tell you about this as soon as our honeymoon was over-"

"Are you fucking kidding me?" He grabbed my arm, seething with rage. "Fuck the honeymoon,"

Ouch

"this is the type of shit you should be telling me about immediately."

"Did Jeongin tell you?" Emilia stood up and asked in a whisper, as if she could no longer breathe. "Does... does Chris also know?"

"No." I shook my head, and Minho's hand away; his grip was starting to hurt. "He's kept your secret, no matter how much it fucked him up. How could you force that kid to grow up like that? Do you know how distressed he's been?"

"Don't you dare judge me for it." She spat. "It was a life and death decision for me, and you would've done the same thing given the circumstances."

I looked back at Minho, who was still angry at me – I could see it on his face. Still, he grabbed my hand, gently this time, and brought it up to his lips, kissing it. He mouthed an "I'm sorry", and I nodded.

"Chris can't know about this." She started shaking her head left and right erratically. "He can't. I can't see him. I don't want to-"

"Emilia, calm down." The younger man who brought the tea put his hands on her shoulders, making her sit back down.

"How the fuck can I be calm, Wooyoung?!" She raised her voice and looked at me and Minho, venom in her eyes. "If Chan finds out-"

"He'll come find you." I finished her sentence.

"No. He can't. Minho, please-"

Minho squeezed my hand and looked at me. I knew what he wanted to do. I knew it wasn't right, and that we shouldn't do this. But Minho's priority was his Mafia's well-being, and my priority was Minho, so I couldn't care less about anyone else, no matter how empathetic I could get.

"I'm sorry, Emilia, but ever since you died, Chris has been a fucking mess..." Minho started. "You're the only one who can make him be... his old self."

"Fuck that. Fuck Chris. Fuck YOU!"

"You have to come back with us." I insisted and released Minho's hand, taking a cautious step towards Emilia.

"No. Not in a million years. I will never come back."

"You have his child." I continued insisting, and she burst out into a hysterical laugh.

"So what? Does he deserve a chance at parenting? Ivy baby, look, this is your daddy. He almost killed mommy and you, and he stepped on her heart repeatedly, but that's okay, because he feels bad about it!"

"I'm sorry, but it's just the way it will be." I looked at her with compassion. I knew it was unfair to her, but she needed to come back.

No, she wouldn't magically fix everything wrong within Chris. Who knows how he'll even react? But she still needed to come back.

Minho would never let her go anyway, now that he knows.

"Fuck your fake-ass compassion." She laughed again, and then I noticed she froze. "Are you seriously threatening me right now? After ruining everything for me?"

I turned around to see what she was talking about, and there was Minho, his gun raised and pointed directly towards Emilia. The other man – Wooyoung – started moving, moment when I took my gun out as well, forcing him to stay in place. I still didn't know how to use it properly, but they didn't need to know that.

"I can't believe you two." Emilia laughed again. "I invite you into my house to talk, and you dare threaten me. How fucking rude you two are. Truly a match made in heaven." She spat.

"I don't want to threaten you. We were the ones who were wrong. But if you don't come back willingly... You leave me no choice."

"So, shoot me, then! Fucking shoot me and end this already, Minho!" She shouted. "I'm not coming with you!"

"No..." He shook his head. "I won't take you with us if you don't want it, Emilia. I'm just saying that... if you won't come, we're gonna stay just like this while Iris goes to the other room and grabs your daughter. She's gonna take her to Chris and explain everything, and that's it."

"You wouldn't." She shook her head in disbelief.

"Try me."

"Fuck you."

"I'm sorry."

"Fuck you!" She shouted harder.

"So, will you come with us?" Minho asked again. He phrased it as if she actually had a choice, which she didn't. It was like that saying: when you only have two choices, you have no choice at all.

"Wooyoung," she started, her voice trembling. "what in the world..."

"I think we have to go with them, Shade..."

"But..."

"Would you let them take Ivy?" Wooyoung whispered. He was distressed as well. It was too cruel, but sometimes you have to be the bad guy in someone else's life.

I was sure that's how Emilia perceived me and Minho.

We were unscrupulous villains who were here to break down everything she built, until nothing was left standing.

And unfortunately she was right.

~

~THE END OF PART ONE – THE BLACK IRIS~

~

PART TWO – THE WITHERED ROSE (coming soon)

---

(A/N) Hello!

We finally reached the end of The Black Iris and I'm so excited for this ending.

Emilia is back!

Part II is in the making right now, so we're going to have a bit of a hiatus unfortunately, but still, thank you for being patient with me and for reading until now!

What are your thoughts? What's going to happen from now on?

Does Chris have any chance to be forgiven?

I'm so excited to keep writing this story!

Thank you again!

Yours truly,

Storm

---

Chapter 7 | PART II - The Withered Rose

[dearfuturehusbandblog]

ZMAN CHEIRUSEINU aka "I'M the terrible communicator!?!?!?!!"

Dear Future Husband,

I hope nobody ever quizzes me on this blog because there are so many things that I've started and stopped writing that never got posted that I literally never remember what I've actually put here...

Not that that's really fully relevant to what I was thinking about writing now, but I currently have two unfinished posts in my drafts folder (amidst 25 others that will probably never get posted) that are just a recap of this year so far.

Because I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare.

Explaining what's going on right now is kind of problematic because I haven't provided the lengthy backstory yet (which is one of the drafts I have yet to finish...)

Suffice to say, MotherLivelyHeart is being a nightmare to me again.

I think I've shared before that MLH and I share a vehicle? If not... yeah, we share a car. I'll have to look through my posts to see if I've explained that situation before, because that's one more thing to check off the "my life absolutely f*ing sucks" list.

Usually this isn't the worst thing in the world because we operate on different schedules and there isn't much crossover when it comes to who needs the car when, and when there is I usually drop her off somewhere, do what I need to do, and pick her up after.

For the record, I HATE when she offers the opposite because I have a history of being abandoned in places waiting for her to pick me up and it gives me such severe anxiety.

So last week on Sunday I asked MLH what her plans were for the next day. I asked this because I overheard a phone call she received on Friday from the dentist's office about an appointment she had on Monday at noon that she hadn't told me anything about and I knew if I was going to ever find out she was going to take the car, I would have to be the one to ask her. So I asked. And wouldn't you believe it, she had a dentist appointment on Monday at noon! Shocker.

Now, I'd been out of work since the beginning of January (again, details will hopefully be in another post) so I had a lot to take care of at work last Monday and I told her that.

We agreed she would have the car for her appointment and I would take the car to work when she got home.

Come Monday afternoon, suddenly everything has changed.

You see, her boss called in sick and she had the day off because she has a specific job that requires her to work alongside her boss and if he doesn't work, she doesn't work.

So she had the day off. Joy.

Of course, did she tell this to me directly? No.

Did she message me this information? No.

I'm just supposed to approach her and ask, "hey, did your boss call in sick and give you the day off?" I guess.

So she went to her appointment and ran some errands and called me while she was still out. Apparently some specific water bottles she can only get in like two places were available at one store about 20 minutes away from our house and she placed a pickup order so she could get them before they were sold out. The order had to be picked up between like 2:30-3:30pm and she called me at around 1:30.

Great.

She picked a pickup time that was directly during the time I was supposed to be at work.

Which she knew.

Because I told her this literally the day before.

So I told her fine. She should do the pickup order and when she got back I would take the car to work.

"Well, I also wanted to go swimming."

*Deep breath* Ok, what time is swimming?

"From 2-9pm."

At this point I didn't know how long I'd be at work because one of the things I had to take care of could be like 4-6 hours and I didn't know if there would be enough time when I was done to get home and let her get to the pool with enough time to swim before they closed.

"Ok, well why don't you go swimming, do the pickup order, and then I'll take the car to work?"

"Well, I want to come home and eat something first."

Ok. So now, what was supposed to be my time to take the car is going to be "stolen" by her coming home (15 minutes), eating something (15 minutes), going to swim (40 minutes), getting the pickup order (30 minutes), and coming back home (20 minutes).

This is TWO HOURS off of my time.

WHICH I HAD TOLD HER I NEEDED LITERALLY THE DAY BEFORE.

So she came home, ate something, and changed into her bathing suit. She left around 2pm for the pool.

I assumed at this point I'd hear from her around 3:30pm that she was around the corner.

But 3:30 came and went.

4:00pm came and went.

4:30pm came and went.

5:00pm came and BigSis messaged that she would be done at work in an hour and could either of us give her a ride home?

MOTHERF@*$%^#$ER

So it's been three hours without an update from MLH, but then she responds "I should be on my way back from the pickup order then."

EXCUSE ME!?!?!?!

She left for the pool at 2pm. THREE HOURS have gone by and she hasn't even gotten the pickup order that was supposed to be picked up between 2:30-3:30pm!?!?!?!!?!?

But she tells me that I'M a terrible communicator.

I was supposed to get the car by 1:30pm latest. It was now after 5pm and I STILL hadn't gotten to work yet.

As much as I hate when she offers to drop me off at work so she can take care of things that will take a few hours, SHE DIDN'T EVEN ASK ME THAT. She made it seem like I would have the car all afternoon to take care of what I needed to at work. And when her plans shifted, she made it seem like I'd have the car by 3:30pm latest.

And let me remind you THAT I TOLD HER THE DAY BEFORE WHAT MY SCHEDULE WAS SO THAT THIS S*** WOULDN'T HAPPEN.

But I'M the terrible communicator.

At that point I was so frickin annoyed already. MLH messaged me "should I get her or just come home" and I was so peeved I said "just get her because if you come home and I take the car I'm not picking her up."

She didn't respond to that message.

Great.

No thumbs up. No "ok." Just nothing.

Then at 6:12pm I get a message from her "car's downstairs in front."

So no message from BigSis that MLH had picked her up and they were heading home. No "we're around the corner." No nothing except over an hour later "take it."

BUT I'M THE TERRIBLE COMMUNICATOR!?

At that point it was too late for me to do some of the things I needed to take care of for work because, again, I was supposed to have been there FIVE HOURS EARLIER. And a friend messaged and asked if I could go with her to Costco, so I said to hell with it and I went to Costco with her.

While I was at Costco I messaged both MotherLivelyHeart and BigSis about what I was getting so we were all on the same page. Included in that message was eggs because, well, I was getting eggs.

I got home at like 10pm and MotherLivelyHeart and BigSis were already asleep. I made a couple of mini salami kugels with some spinach that oddly floated to the top, waited for them to cool, tried 1/4 of one before sticking them in the fridge.

Next morning I open the fridge and there's a new carton of 1.5 dozen eggs. Because apparently MLH went to the supermarket early in the morning and got eggs because "we were out."

DESPITE ME LITERALLY MESSAGING THE NIGHT BEFORE THAT I WAS BUYING EGGS AT COSTCO.

Oh, but it gets better. Because the salami kugel I had tasted the night before was missing.

BigSis was working from home so I asked her about it and she said she had no clue.

So I asked MotherLivelyHeart about it, thinking maybe it slipped out of the fridge, smashed, and she threw it out.

But no.

Guess who ate it.

Yep, the woman who has been suffering from gout and avoiding meat for the better part of a year.

The woman who saw it in the fridge and said to herself "oh, that's one of the broccoli kugels LivelyHeart made for herself for Shabbos that she said wasn't good. I guess I'll eat that for breakfast without asking her if she really doesn't want it because although she's on a weird diet right now, there's no way she's made a meal plan for herself that includes this food item she made for herself."

Because, did she message me to ask if she could have it?

Nope.

Did she knock on my door to ask if she could have it?

Nope.

Halfway through eating it she realized it was salami.

And she still finished the whole thing.

And still at NO POINT did she message me AT ALL to even tell me that she ate it.

I had to find out by inquiring OF HER.

BUT. I'M. THE. TERRIBLE. COMMUNICATOR!?!?!?!

I shouldn't be mad.

It's just food, after all, right?

Except that it's not.

It's a frickin pattern of carelessness and disregard for me as a person.

And I'm so frickin sick of it.

I'm so damn tired.

It wouldn't have killed her to ask.

It wouldn't have killed her to apologize.

And what I haven't really explained here (because again, that's in a draft post) is that I've been on an elimination diet since January 1st which has cut most things from my available food selections.

But is she on an elimination diet?

Nope.

So we have a HOUSEFUL, a PANTRYFUL, and a FRIDGEFUL of food she can eat.

And she chooses the ONE thing I made FOR ME.

Which she KNEW I made for ME.

Instead of the MYRIAD OF THINGS that she can eat that I can't.

Which means that she's not only taken a meal from me, but now I'm at a food deficit from the fridge while she lives in abundance.

BUT. I'M. THE. TERRIBLE. COMMUNICATOR.

So let's leap forward to today.

Today was Shabbos mevorchim. Pesach is in two weeks.

And MotherLivelyHeart decided we are going to change over the kitchen two weeks ahead this year.

So she scheduled her cleaning lady to come tomorrow (Sunday) to help clean the kitchen so it can be turned over.

Did she take into account that this would be motzei Shabbos and that we'd have to make Shabbos and that would involve dirty dishes and use of the stove/oven and pots and pans?

Yeah, no.

Did she take into account that the way she wants to clean the oven requires the oven to be self-cleaned before and after which takes a good several hours and creates so much smoke that we'd have to keep the windows open and also it's like 40F right now and she also wanted to go to sleep early because the cleaning lady is coming at like 8am?

Yeah, no.

BigSis went over the oven cleaning thing with her and she exclaimed "are you kidding me?! Then why am I having the cleaning lady come tomorrow?!"

BECAUSE YOU SCHEDULED HER WITHOUT CONSULTING US.

BECAUSE THERE WAS NO COMMUNICATION.

DO YOU SEE A FRICKIN THEME HERE!?!?!!?

Oh, but there's more. Because there's always more.

Thursday was another nightmare day for various reasons. One of which was that I ran errands with MotherLivelyHeart.

She scheduled an appointment for smackdab in the middle of the time I told her I'd be working.

YES. AGAIN.

And she wanted to drop me off at work and pick me up when I was done.

Well absofrickinlutelynot, thankyouverymuch.

I was supposed to work until 6pm.

I had told customers I would be available until 6pm.

Her appointment was scheduled for 6pm.

So of course "I need the car at 5:30pm."

She wanted to drive me to work earlier so that she could take the car at 5:30pm to her appointment that wouldn't be done until 7pm and then come get me an hour and a half after I was done working.

But I was supposed to trust that she wouldn't run errands or dilly dally around and that she'd actually get me at 7:30pm, which we know is never the case.

So I told her no, I'd be taking the car to work. But I would notify the customers I'd only be there until 5:30pm, at which point I'd get her and drive her to her appointment. Then while she was in her appointment I could do the Shabbos shopping, since it seemed pointless to have to wait for her to come home again before I could go out and shop.

For various reasons, we had three stores we needed to go to, one of which was about 20 minutes in the opposite direction of where her appointment was. I figured I could go there first, then on my way back to get her I could run by the other two stores, get her and then we'd go straight home.

But no.

Because it was raining and people apparently don't know how to drive in the rain. So despite me taking the highway, which should have cut like 10 minutes out of the ride each way, it took me about 30 minutes to get to that first store, which I was in for maybe 10 minutes, and as I was checking out MLH messaged "my appointment is almost over, where are you at?"

So all I had time for was turning around and going straight to get her.

Which, fine, whatever.

One of the stores we went to literally just for chicken.

And it was chicken for her because she wanted a specific type of breaded chicken for Shabbos.

So I figured I'd run into the store and grab it while she stayed in the car.

But no.

Because while I was unbuckling, she was unbuckling. Because she decided to come in.

So she went to look at side salads and I went to the chicken section where I waited but she never showed up.

Then I get a message from her.

"Where are you?"

Excuse me???? WHERE ARE YOU, WOMAN???

I told her I was at the chicken section waiting for her and she said "I already checked out. I'm going back to the car."

WE LITERALLY WENT TO THIS STORE TO BUY HER CHICKEN.

SHE CAME IN WITH ME.

PRESUMABLY TO BUY HER CHICKEN.

But she's checked out already!? WITH WHAT!?

Oh. Apparently something to eat. Because she's hangry.

Which she, OF COURSE, DID NOT TELL ME.

Fine. Whatever.

So I bought her frickin chicken.

And then on the way home she got mad at me about three driving-related things that were out of my control (like the car started making a weird noise that might be the muffler, and there was a huge pothole I couldn't avoid, and I was coming to a stop at an intersection when some lady rounded the corner quickly and we barely missed colliding...) which resulted in her yelling at me that she hates the way I'm driving.

So, yeah, that was a fun ride home.

*EYEROLL*

Anyway, on the way to her appointment she said "we never worked out a Shabbos menu."

I told her the same thing I've told her almost every week over the last three months: I'm eating differently from you guys, so you just tell me what you want and I'll grab it from the store, because I already have set aside what I'm going to eat.

And she tells me "my boss has off tomorrow, so I can cook."

Which is perfectly fine in my eyes because I'm still recovering from an injury (again, that's one of the drafted posts...) and I also had a horrendous cold for the previous two weeks so I'm still trying to get back to baseline. Any pressure off me is appreciated.

We basically worked out that for shabbos we'd do a big soup for Friday night (which I would make), then she wanted chicken (obvs) and I had bought green beans at Costco I told her she could have, and then Shabbos lunch would be fish and salady stuff.

Well, Friday rolls around.

The day already sucked because I tried adding some vegetables back into my diet during the week that are apparently problematic for my digestion. Fun.

But then MotherLivelyHeart decides to stick to her arbitrary Pesach cleaning schedule which says to clean the milchig dishes she's had piling up all week. So of course she decides to do this at like noon and doesn't finish the job and there are still milchig dishes in the sink at 3pm when I need to go in and make the soup.

Add onto that, one of my "chores" is the pareve dishes, some of which have been piling up too and also need to be done, which she feels the need to remind me of, despite her milchig dishes still filling the sink.

So I go in around 3pm and just start cooking, using the small bit of counter space that's available to me.

She decides that's the perfect time to finish the milchig dishes.

FINE. WHATEVER.

She gets them out of the way and reminds me YET AGAIN about the pareve dishes.

FINEWHATEVER.

So around 4pm I'm back in the kitchen, doing the pareve dishes, of which I only got about half done because it was causing pain and I still had to cook.

So I pivoted and did the soup.

But nothing else had been cooked yet.

So I made the green beans.

And I had to separate the soups so I could add things to theirs that I can't eat.

At this point I'm still annoyed from her the day before, my insides are so unhappy with the newly tested foods, I'm in pain from the injury, and I'm trying to cook for Shabbos.

Around 6pm I asked BigSis if she could help with the chicken. She was like "I STILL HAVE TO SHOWER!!!" As though she didn't have all day for that and somehow me needing help is my fault. She said "if you had asked me like three hours ago I could have done it."

Except that three hours ago, the milchig dishes were still filling up the sink, so.... what exactly do you expect from me!?

Sometime a little earlier when MotherLivelyHeart had been in the kitchen it was clear I wasn't doing so well and she asked what was wrong and I described the pain and she was like "I'm sorry" and then disappeared.

So then she gets a "20 minutes to candle lighting" alarm on her phone, and she's been trying to light early in zchus of the hostages and chayalim, so she calls out "20 minutes to licht benchen." Which I responded to but she didn't hear, obviously, because she yelled again "LivelyHeart, did you hear me!?"

To which I responded an annoyed "YES!!" and she was like "you don't have to talk to me that way! I clearly didn't hear you. And BigSis and I can make Shabbos on our own, you know."

Which, MYGODWOMAN. YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO.

My responsibility based on our conversation was the soup.

ZE HU.

SHE was supposed to do the chicken and the green beans and whatever else they wanted.

So now she's annoyed at me because I'm annoyed at her for not doing the thing she was supposed to do, but I'M the one in the wrong.

FINE. Whatever.

In the end I didn't do the chicken.

I literally didn't have the strength for it, let alone the energy.

Not that it was really missed at the meal, but she was a bit annoyed and gave me that same "BigSis and I can cook for Shabbos on our own, you know." To which I responded "You said you were going to cook." I literally don't even remember what her response was.

Well, fast forward through Shabbos to tonight because I asked her if she wanted the chicken for melava malka or if we should stick it in the freezer for a week since it's KFP.

She wanted it for melava malka.

Which, fine, whatever.

I told her if she could bread it, I would cook it.

She got gloves, she got bowls, she got the chicken, and she got eggs.

She did not get the other ingredients she needed for the breading. Or a plate to put it on. Or a fork.

She sat down at the table and then asked me to get the other ingredients.

Which, fine. Whatever.

I got an interesting piece of mail that I'll discuss in another post when I know more what's going on with it, but it basically called my attention to research something. So I was on my computer off to the side while she was breading the chicken.

The next thing I know, she's frying the chicken.

I went into the kitchen and asked her why she was frying it when I told her I would do it for her since cooking usually exhausts her, and she got all frustrated and exasperated at me and said something like "I DON'T HAVE ALL NIGHT TO WAIT FOR YOU."

And I was like, "what are you talking about!? I was waiting for you to finish breading it! you didn't tell me you were done!"

Which just pissed her off more.

BECAUSE. I'M. THE. TERRIBLE. COMMUNICATOR.

But this is the time of year we celebrate freedom, right?

This is the time of year we thank Hashem for rescuing us from a horrible situation.

Well, where's mine?

We're supposed to celebrate every year as though WE ALL left Mitzrayim.

As though we were ALL saved.

But I am not saved.

I have never been saved.

The stupidity I've just described above is just a piece of the insane patterning of my entire life.

I have no escape from this nonsense.

And I'm just so done with all of it.

I want it all to be over.

I want it all to go away.

Where's my freedom?

Where's my salvation?

I really have to finish those other two drafts, because this isn't even the clearest picture of what I've been dealing with since 2024 started. It's barely April and I just want this secular year to be over.

There are a couple of people who have suggested guys to me over the last several months and, although they're not really what I'm looking for, right now I just don't have the emotional energy for a new relationship. I'm just so burned out from this one that I deal with every frickin day of my stupid life, which of course I can't even tell these people.

So... dear future husband, I hope you can hang in there, because I don't know when I'll be ready for you.

But maybe by then I'll be a good communicator.

-LivelyHeart

And now for the story after the story:

So, after that disaster of a drive back from the store on Thursday night, we got home around 8:30pm and although she got something small to eat from that second supermarket I knew that MotherLivelyHeart hadn't eaten anything since lunch so when I made dinner for myself I made a second bowl for her. I brought it to her and she said "oh... you didn't have to do that." Not a lot of enthusiasm there.

She didn't eat it for about a half an hour, by which time it was probably cold, and the next thing I knew, she was in bed going to sleep without another word about how it was.

Now, I don't demand praise or feedback for anything I cook, but she usually makes a comment about whatever I make, so I found it odd that she was silent on the matter.

On Friday I went to ask her about something else and while I was talking to her I asked how her dinner was the night before and she said something along the lines of, "it was... interesting. ground chicken just doesn't cook well, it's not your fault. you prepared it well, it's just not that good. ground turkey is better."

No "thank you," no "it was sweet of you to think of me," no "I appreciate the effort especially considering that you're working through the pain right now."

Just meh.

I love when I'm appreciated.

[quinloki]

Some Direction

Fem Reader x Roronoa Zoro

CW: Language, stalking, violence, sexual themes and situations, ptsd 18+ only

Chapter 1 - Table of Consent -

Chapter 2: Directionally

"Let me get this straight," you say, your hands pressed together in front of you as you sit in the backroom with Zoro. You had forcefully, and angrily, kicked everyone else out. "You left the dojo with the intention of walking to the main branch, so you could go through your Match Book in peace, and somehow you ended up here?"

Zoro, previously picture-perfected scowl and all, is sitting across from you, and just grunts in response.

"... Which direction did you go when you left the dojo?" You're almost afraid to ask.

"West."

"Okay, but..." No, no you weren't going to say it, never mind. Let's just put the fact that the Main Branch was north of the dojo off to the side for now. He could've actually gone north, thought it was west, and yet somehow ended up taking a large curve to the south and ended up in your library. "How can you be so bad at directions?"

Zoro's tongue clicks in irritation, and you realize you had said the last part out loud. No sense in apologizing, you had meant it and objectively it was true, and you felt like if you were overly concerned about his feelings he'd just get more irritated.

Sighing after a few moments silence, you set your Match Book off to the side. "Do you want to set up a meeting for tomorrow then?" You question. First meetings technically had to be witnessed, and were often attended by at least one family member from each side. You weren't breaking any laws by meeting accidentally like this, but it wasn't going to count for meeting within 48 hours if it wasn't properly witnessed.

"Sure." His face had been in a scowl for the last few minutes, but something about his tone made you think he wasn't angry, just uncomfortable.

"I'll... come to the dojo then. Your father's there, right? It'll be easier for both of you. I'm sure Brook will give me tomorrow off, so I can be by, uh, 1pm? If that's not too early?"

"It's not."

Well, it was a good thing you were used to having quiet nights. This man was certainly the laconic type. You wondered idly what topic of conversation you could get him on that would have him talking, even better - talking with a smile on his face. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn't imagine him with a big smile on his face, and some part of you thought that was a shame.

Everyone should be able to smile.

"Alright then, I... uh... look forward to it." You smile, but it probably looks as awkward as it feels. This whole arranged marriage stuff was even more uncomfortable than you had expected.

He grunts, but doesn't argue. "Are you only bringing one more with you?"

"Eh?" You question, stopping in the middle of getting up.

"Tomorrow. Bringing your mom or dad or both."

Oh right, he didn't get a chance to really sit down and read his Match Book before you interrupted him. Well, he'd have some time to read over it today and tomorrow morning. You finished standing up and nodded to his Match Book.

"It'll just be me," you say, and this time your smile is well-practiced. "Let me walk you out."

He grunts again, but doesn't question your or argue. Not that the poor guy had much room to argue, you just hope he was truly thrown off by the Match Book, and not actually that terrible at directions. Otherwise, you might beat him back to the dojo tomorrow.

You get him through the library without incident, and without running into Nami, though you were pretty sure that was thanks to Robin. When you get to the door you hold it open for him.

"Sorry again for just uh, coming up behind you like that." You apologize as he steps past you.

"It's fine, it worked out." He replies, nodding his head slightly, and walking away. You saw him drifting to the left down the wide staircase.

"Ah, Mr. Roronoa?" You call out, causing him to turn around. You smile and point to the right. "Unless you're running errands, the dojo's that way." You didn't stick around to see if he needed the help or not, stepping back into the library quickly.

You spent the rest of your shift distracted, but no one held it against you. Brook hovered around you a little, but he didn't pester you with questions. He spent most of his time intercepting people who came up to you with questions and directing them on your behalf. The old man was surprisingly quick when the occasion called for it. He had even told you to take the next day off before you had a chance to ask for it.

Such accommodations were to be expected, but the whole thing still felt a little surreal to you. Ever since the World Government had implemented arranged marriages, there had been a slew of TV shows and Movies that had depicted how awkward first impressions could be. Inevitably the two people would come to an understanding, given enough time and communication. It was, at its core, propaganda for the masses, to smooth over the whole situation.

Still, you found yourself replaying sitcom episodes in your head and listening to songs about enemies to lovers as you went about your evening once you got home. You weren't put off of Zoro entirely, but you felt apathetic toward things so far. You didn't really want to spend your life going through a routine that just happened to have someone else on the edges of it.

What unsettled you was that your first impression of him was that he would, like you, allow that very thing to happen. A listless life, with no direction and no momentum. The only saving grace would be the government's insistence that you have at least one child, and the energy and chaos of a child was enough to throw any family into motion.

Wild, unstable motion maybe, but life wouldn't be listless.

You soaked in the tub until the water started to cool, tossed on an old over-sized shirt and drifted off to sleep.

. . . . . .

The next day you let your day start slowly, had a light breakfast, and put on a simple dress before doing up your hair a little. You wanted to look nice, but you didn't want to go to the nines and show up to find everyone else in t-shirts and jeans. You slipped on a pair of smooth-fabric tight shorts under your dress, which made walking more comfortable and saved you from any embarrassing moments if your skirt went rogue. Plus, there was just enough pocket space for a bus pass, your id and house key.

Instead of heels you opted for what were essentially leather-topped sneakers. They looked nice enough for work, but they were delightfully comfortable. Most of your wardrobe was practicality over fashion, but you could still manage being fashionable. You made sure your socks were a little on the thicker side, if this was happening in a dojo, you'd need to take your shoes off and still keep your feet warm.

With one last check to make sure you were presentable you caught the bus to cover most of the distance to the dojo. You could feel someone staring at you while you were on the bus, but you did your best to ignore it. It was a short ride between your home and the dojo, but it would've been a long walk.

The grounds of the dojo were walled off, which meant the entire block was. It was more likely that, as the city had developed around the dojo, the wall had been raised to minimize distractions within. This led to there being a large entryway, enough for cars to go through when needed, with a side door for people to come and go through.

It was done well, honoring the origins of the dojo while still having a clean modern sense, as though it was welcoming the city instead of trying to reject it.

Standing outside the main entrance, looking horribly uncomfortable in a suit and tie, was a grumpy looking Zoro. You did your best to suppress the amused smile that was tugging at your lips as you got close enough for him to turn toward you. He seemed a little embarrassed that you'd caught him grumbling about the suit. In some ways, it looked good on him, in more ways though, it looked awkward on him.

"It seems you're more for function than fashion as well." You muse, trying to help ease the tension with levity.

He grunts, but his silence was a surprising response.

"If you want to lose the tie at least, I didn't exactly stick to tradition either." You admit, lifting up your skirt as he turns to face you. His face twists in shock for a split second before he realizes you were wearing shorts under your skirt. You couldn't help the small laugh that escapes you as your let your skirt fall back down.

"Here," you say, reaching for the tie. "Let me wear it. Then your father won't be able to argue, right?"

"How?" He questions, stepping back from you and loosening the tie himself.

You shrug. "Your Match Book gave me some idea, but I did a lot of research when I was looking to learn martial arts, to make sure I had a good teacher." You take the offered tie and slip it over your head. "There's a lot of weight given to tradition and history, which isn't a bad thing, but that's why I assumed your father didn't leave you much room to argue."

You let your hair down, so that it covers the loop of the tie, and covers your shoulders a little. This way you look like you're wearing a tie, and not a noose.

"There! And look, it doesn't even clash with my dress." You offer a smile. "Problem solved, yes?"

The door beside the gate opened and a rather severe looking man came into view. He was wearing a suit, and unlike with Zoro, the look suited him in many ways. It was as tight and disciplined as you imagined he was. The man's face was wholly unreadable, but contained neither anger nor irritation.

You bow, ignoring the tie dangling from you, and straighten with a smile. "Mr. Dracule, it's a pleasure to meet you."

"Miss (L/N), I'm glad you made it without issue." Mihawk's appearance and manner might be tight, but his voice was surprisingly smooth. "Please, come in."

"Thank you." You step inside as Mihawk steps aside. You turn to him after you've made room for Zoro to come in and smile as you hold onto the tie. "I hope you don't mind; I stole your son's tie when I arrived."

Zoro's ears went pink as he steps in and closes the door behind him, and the look Mihawk had been giving him melts away. He smiles at you, and the action is disarming, for the first time you think you might be able to imagine Zoro smiling.

"As long as it wasn't foisted upon you." Mihawk says pointedly, his gaze shifting to his grumpy son.

"Not at all," you assure him. "I was feeling a little under dressed and this simply makes us even."

Mihawk makes a noise that leaves you with the impression that he is simply accepting your explanation, despite not entirely believing it. You feel admonished, and almost start to apologize before he speaks up.

"Zoro, show Miss (L/N) to the tearoom." Mihawk prompts.

Zoro offers his arm to you without a word, and the level of etiquette brings a smile to your lips. You murmur a thanks and slip your arm through his. It was the most physical contact you'd had in years, and it was the first real contact you and Zoro had at all. He was warm, or you were warm, but there was no discomfort in that warmth.

Zoro leads you into the foyer, and you tuck your shoes away with the others you could see, putting on a pair of house slippers that had been provided, and stepping up into the hallway proper. You wait as Zoro does the same, and then leads you to the tearoom.

You were simultaneously relieved and disheartened to see a full table set up in the tearoom, western style chairs and all. It had been a long time since you attended a proper tea ceremony, and you were no longer as practiced at sitting properly for one. You could probably manage, but you'd be sore after. It would've been nice to get into the practice of it, but a first meeting wasn't the correct time to do so anyway.

The tea was delicious, and there was plenty of polite small talk. The whole point of a witnessed meeting was to try and shake off the awkwardness of first-time meetings. Generally, there were more than three people at the first meeting, but three was the minimum. You had no doubt that Dracule Mihawk was capable of keeping you and Zoro in check, no matter how things went.

After tea, Mihawk had Zoro take you on a small tour of the property. The landscaping was beautiful. There was a Zen Garden, a small western style flower garden in another area, and a green house in another location. You and Zoro opted to skip the green house, it was warm enough outside, the green house would just be humid on top of it all. There was a study and a small library, you were already in love with the place before that point, but the library was very well organized, and you gave your praise to whomever maintained it.

"A properly organized library is just relaxing." You muse as you leave the library behind and continue the tour.

"You sound like Mihawk-Sensei." Zoro replies, and you weren't sure if it was a compliment or not. He slides a door open, and it gives way to a large open room lined with tatami mats. No part of the property had been, by any stretch of the definition, messy, but the dojo proper seemed extra immaculate.

"Oh wow. Can I go in?" You question.

Zoro nods. "Sure."

You automatically slip your house slippers off before stepping onto the mats and walk slowly around the large open room. There are traditional burned wood planks that denote the Master, his assistants, and the students. The dojo is doing well, given the length of the roster. There are practical displays for shinai and bokken, and a few ceremonial displays that are likely true steel katanas.

Zoro is leaning in the doorway, just watching you move around the dojo. You're too absorbed in all the details of the room to notice anything more about him, but his gaze isn't making you uncomfortable.

"Is it rude to ask how old the dojo is?" You question, keeping your hands laced behind your back as you lean forward to read an inscription under a set of three katanas.

"The millennial celebration is in nine years." Zoro answers. "According to the official records."

"Mm. It's probably older than that then," you state straightening up. "It's good to celebrate what you can though."

Zoro grunts in response. You're starting to get used to it. It's his way of acknowledging that he's listening without prolonging a conversation he doesn't think needs to be prolonged. Time would tell if your assumption was correct, but there was nothing about him that made you feel he was duplicitous. He seemed like someone who didn't even want to waste time with the obvious, never mind wasting energy trying to hide who he was.

"Are you accepting new students?" You question half idly, half curiously, catching Zoro flinching slightly.

Mihawk answers, stepping into view, and entering into the dojo with you. "Are you interested in learning?"

You nod. "I haven't learned a weapon-centric style of martial arts before, but there's a practicality in getting back into the practice."

"Oh? What have you studied before?" Mihawk prompts.

"Tai-chi and Judo. The former more than the latter." You admit, walking over to two of them. "When I was completing my education to become a librarian, I didn't have the time to continue consistently, and after that I fell into my new job and hadn't looked for a new place to get back into things."

"Did you ever compete?" Mihawk asks, and you were starting to get the distinct impression he was asking on Zoro's behalf. Maybe everything he'd done today had been on the young man's behalf. As far as you were concerned that made him a good dad.

You shake your head. "I learned for self-defense and to keep in shape. Admittedly, the idea of hurting someone on accident during a match made me too nervous to try, and yeah I get that if I'm going to use it as self-defense someone is going to get hurt. But that's... different."

"Mm." Mihawk acknowledges shortly. "Your assumption being that in a match, your opponent doesn't mean to harm you."

"Yeah... Ah, I hope that's not rude of me?"

"To some, maybe. To others, no." He answers honestly. "It depends on the ideology of the person in question."

"Then... how would each of you take it?"

Zoro clicks his tongue and looks away with a scowl, and that was really all the answer you needed from him.

Mihawk offers you a small smile. "We are of a similar mind on this, but I don't begrudge you for your feelings."

"If he has learned his lessons well, then he doesn't either." Mihawk adds after a moment's pause.

Zoro grunts but didn't say anything else on the topic. "You've seen everything, are you hungry?"

"Yes, if it's not too much trouble. I had a small breakfast and the snacks from the tea seem to be wearing off." You answer with a strained smile, putting the house slippers back on.

The rest of the afternoon went well enough. You learned that Zoro wasn't much of a cook, but the meal of the day was a joint effort between him and his father. It was good, you weren't a picky eater, but it was as good as you could do, you were sure.

Light conversation continued, and things started to get a little more personal at the end of it.

"If it's uncomfortable Miss (L/N), you don't have to answer, but you brought neither family nor a friend with you today." Mihawk begins, "According to the Match Book, I can understand the former."

You nod, your practiced smile covering your face as you respond. "I'm sure the details were a little vague in the book, but I don't mind explaining." You take in a breath, no matter how often you told this story, it was always at least a little uncomfortable. "My biological parents were murdered by Kuro when I was five."

There was a lot hanging in that sentence, though neither Zoro or Mihawk reacted. Kuro had been a prolific serial killer 20 years ago, and everyone who had survived his bloody assaults had been believed to be cursed. It was simply referred to as being Kursed when people wrote it down, but the heavy emphasis on the word made it remarkable when spoken as well.

Kuro slaughtered nearly 100 people during the decade he was active, but he had double that in actual victims. The people who survived his attacks seemed to have a terrible aura of bad luck surrounding them, and people around those survivors seemed to die at an abnormally high rate. Sometimes accidents, sometimes disease, it wasn't like people around the survivors were murdered, but someone made a connection at some point and the idea of the curse was born.

You were, frustratingly, part of that statistic. "I was adopted some years later, and when I was sixteen my adoptive parents died in a car accident. After that I kept to myself. I petitioned the courts and was able to have myself marked as an adult at 16 and now here I am."

"I see." Mihawk says evenly, after a moment's quiet consideration.

You kept your same practiced smile. "I'm sure you can petition for a Rematch because of this, if you want."

Zoro's default scowl deepens, and you were surprised how neutral his original expression was in comparison. "Rematch? Over some stu-."

"Roronoa." Mihawk interrupts forcefully.

Zoro looks away, seething quietly.

"I doubt such action will be necessary." Mihawk responds. "My apologies for causing you discomfort Miss (L/N)."

"Oh, no apology needed." You assure him, and it was true. You had been dealing with the plethora of ways that people reacted to you being a survivor of Kuro's rage. 

The man was still on the loose, though most assumed he was too old to continue, since it had been some years since the last confirmed victim.

Next Chapter

[onyourstageleft]

personal rant bc I'm a lil salty rn

I've become the default errand runner for the household and most times it's fine but like... if my partner who works from home has already left the house of her own volition to go to the dollar tree in the same plaza as the Kroger, why do they make it seem like a big ask (a "Yeah. I suppose. I didn’t really want to but I can" reply) when I say "hey can you run into Kroger and get the two items we need from there" esp when I'm already at Sam's to get things on my lunch break today and have to go to the pet store after work for cat food? like I wouldn't ask if you didn't leave the house and weren't literally 1,500 feet from the Kroger, plus I've already said I need to do school work when I get home after running the lunch time and after work errand? I don't think I would be so peeved about this today if the same partner didn't also do this yesterday, like they went to the Asian Market and then went to Sam's on the way home to look at the optical center, said "I don't wanna get the groceries we need from here can you get them on your way home like you planned?" and then I said "that's totally understandable I can get them after work it's no problem" like I spent 40 minutes in Sam's after working an 8 hour shift yesterday for you bc you didn't want to get the things when you were literally already in the same store, but it's clearly an inconvenience when I ask you to go across the parking lot and into a store for two (2) items, one of which is on the list by your request, to save me a whole stop (at least 15 minutes) on my way home from another 8 hour shift today?

also I will absolutely talk to them about this tonight but that's a convo better had in person and not over text, plus I need to get some of my strong reaction about it out now so I don't blow it out of proportion tonight

thanks for dealing with my rant ily

[purplesurveys]

1846

1 - What have you been up to so far today? Is that a typical thing for you to do on this particular day of the week?  It was definitely a busier Saturday than usual; I never spend the weekend squeezing in like 10 errands in a day unless I have a work event to begin with.

2 - Did you get a decent night’s sleep last night? How many hours sleep do you consider a decent amount?  It was okay! I fell asleep a little earlier than I thought I would, so it was nice to get a few extra hours in. The only thing I didn't like was that I woke up disoriented; I thought it was Monday and that I was running late for work, so I pretty much woke up with my heartbeat spiking.

3 - What is one silly thing that really gets on your nerves?  When people try to make small talk at the start of work calls. That was fine during the pandemic, but at this point, I swear I won't take it against you if you don't ask me how my weekend was or where I traleved during the Christmas break.

4 - Who was the last person you saw who wasn’t family? What did you guys end up doing together?  I saw my workmates and other agencies when we had to go to our client's office for a face-to-face meeting. We essentially went through like 70+ slides to brief the client on the final flow of our large-scale event this Sunday.

5 - Do you prefer hot or cold drinks overall?  Cold. I hate feeling like my tongue's getting burned.

6 - Do you own a decent set of waterproofs? If so, what do you use them for the most? If not, do you think that would be something you’d find useful?  Waterproof...what? Clothes? Phone case? Shoes? Hahaha. Anyway I don't think I own anything that's waterproof.

7 - Do you have any plans for the rest of the day?  I just need to finish this doughnut I'm eating lol, maybe take another survey after this...then I'll need to turn in early because I have an early start tomorrow.

8 - How often do you get your hair cut? When hairdressers were closed due to COVID, did you try cutting it yourself at home?  Probably like once a year. I never cut my hair during the Peak Pandemic Era – it helped that I had it trimmed literally a week before it all began, not knowing it was going to start.

9 - What did you wear the last time you left the house? Is that different to what you’re wearing at the moment? I went out today and haven't changed out of my outfit yet so I'll just enumerate what I have on – a purple cropped top + jeans.

10 - Would you rather have a relaxing beach holiday or a more active holiday in the mountains?  I'd love the beach as I can't remember the last time I had a beach trip + the mountains sound super isolating. It also reminds me of hiking, and there is no activity I hate more.

11 - Do you know how to tie a tie?  No. I kept the knot on my school necktie for like 14 years so that I could just always wear it like a necklace, lol.

12 - How old were you when you first had a sleepover at someone’s house? Did you miss home?  I think I was like 15 or 16 when I had my first sleepover. No, I was just mostly excited to finally be in a sleepover lol as I was never allowed prior. Woes of being a firstborn Asian daugher – you're 100% Test Subject A.

13 - How often do you spend time with your extended family? I would say once a month. We live very near each other.

14 - When you get up in the morning, do you have a set routine?  Yup. It's nothing special but it is my routine that I like to follow; any missing step and I'll get super bothered hahaha. Anyway, I'm an early waker, so I usually allot an hour to properly wake up and stay in bed catching up on social media/news.

Around 30 minutes before work, that's when I make my bed, take a quick shower and brush my teeth, fix myself a cup of iced coffee, then spend the remaining minutes clearing up emails that came the night before. They're simple things but it helps me SO MUCH to start work in a good/relaxed mood.

15 - Do you remember the last time you cried? Were they sad or happy tears?  Happy tears! I cried a little bit this afternoon watching a video of this kid reacting to Cody's win from last Sunday. I didn't cry watching him cry, but then he said "Everybody helped, everyone helped him" which was what broke me. That was such a wholesome thing to hear!

16 - What do you have planned once you finish this survey?  I really want to take one more of these but we'll see.

17 - What was the last thing you cooked? Did you cook from scratch or just heat something up? I don't cook. I buy most of my food.

18 - Are you a fan of hot chocolate? Do you like it plain or do you prefer to add things like whipped cream or marshmallows?  I'm picky. It needs to be like artisan hot chocolate and I'm usually willing to pay more for premium options as most hot chocolates here are really just Milo :(

19 - What caused your last injury?  Cooper nicked a bit of my fingernail when he got a little too excited play-wrestling with me for his toy.

20 - How many tattoos and piercings do you have? Do any of them have an interesting story behind them?  Zero tattoos. I got my earlobe piercings when I was a few months old so there isn't really a deeper story behind them haha.

21 - What kind of flowers do you like the best? When was the last time someone bought those for you?  I've always liked peonies. I can't remember the last time I got flowers.

22 - What’s the smallest thing you’ve ended a relationship over?  I've only experienced a failed relationship once.

23 - Would you rather order a starter (appetiser) or a dessert? Or would you be able to manage a full three courses? Appetizers. I don't like sweet things too much, so it's rare that I ask to stay long enough for dessert.

24 - How do you get most of your news, if you pay attention to it at all?  These days, Reddit.

25 - Have you or a member of your family been diagnosed with COVID yet?  My mom and sister had it simultaneously but fortunately they were asymptomatic as it could've possibly gotten. I got the worst experience of the bunch.

26 - Are you a vegetarian? If so, what persuaded you to stop eating meat? If not, is it something you’d ever consider?  No. I would consider it, yes, but I honestly don't have faith in myself to commit to it.

27 - Do you prefer rice or pasta? RICE. A day legitimately feels incomplete without rice...

28 - Is anything you’re wearing a gift? Who bought it for you?  Nah.

29 - What’s the dominant colour in the room you’re in at the moment?  White.

30 - Did you do laundry yet today? If not, do you need to do any before you go to bed?  Nope and nope.

[mugiwara-no-toshokan]

Some Direction

CisFem Reader x Roronoa Zoro

CW: Language, stalking, violence, sexual themes and situations, ptsd -- surprisingly fluffy despite it all. 18+ only

Chapter 2: Directionally

"Let me get this straight," you say, your hands pressed together in front of you as you sit in the backroom with Zoro. You had forcefully, and angrily, kicked everyone else out. "You left the dojo with the intention of walking to the main branch, so you could go through your Match Book in peace, and somehow you ended up here?"

Zoro, previously picture-perfected scowl and all, is sitting across from you, and just grunts in response.

"... Which direction did you go when you left the dojo?" You're almost afraid to ask.

"West."

"Okay, but..." No, no you weren't going to say it, never mind. Let's just put the fact that the Main Branch was north of the dojo off to the side for now. He could've actually gone north, thought it was west, and yet somehow ended up taking a large curve to the south and ended up in your library. "How can you be so bad at directions?"

Zoro's tongue clicks in irritation, and you realize you had said the last part out loud. No sense in apologizing, you had meant it and objectively it was true, and you felt like if you were overly concerned about his feelings he'd just get more irritated.

Sighing after a few moments silence, you set your Match Book off to the side. "Do you want to set up a meeting for tomorrow then?" You question. First meetings technically had to be witnessed, and were often attended by at least one family member from each side. You weren't breaking any laws by meeting accidentally like this, but it wasn't going to count for meeting within 48 hours if it wasn't properly witnessed.

"Sure." His face had been in a scowl for the last few minutes, but something about his tone made you think he wasn't angry, just uncomfortable.

"I'll... come to the dojo then. Your father's there, right? It'll be easier for both of you. I'm sure Brook will give me tomorrow off, so I can be by, uh, 1pm? If that's not too early?"

"It's not."

Well, it was a good thing you were used to having quiet nights. This man was certainly the laconic type. You wondered idly what topic of conversation you could get him on that would have him talking, even better - talking with a smile on his face. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn't imagine him with a big smile on his face, and some part of you thought that was a shame.

Everyone should be able to smile.

"Alright then, I... uh... look forward to it." You smile, but it probably looks as awkward as it feels. This whole arranged marriage stuff was even more uncomfortable than you had expected.

He grunts, but doesn't argue. "Are you only bringing one more with you?"

"Eh?" You question, stopping in the middle of getting up.

"Tomorrow. Bringing your mom or dad or both."

Oh right, he didn't get a chance to really sit down and read his Match Book before you interrupted him. Well, he'd have some time to read over it today and tomorrow morning. You finished standing up and nodded to his Match Book.

"It'll just be me," you say, and this time your smile is well-practiced. "Let me walk you out."

He grunts again, but doesn't question your or argue. Not that the poor guy had much room to argue, you just hope he was truly thrown off by the Match Book, and not actually that terrible at directions. Otherwise, you might beat him back to the dojo tomorrow.

You get him through the library without incident, and without running into Nami, though you were pretty sure that was thanks to Robin. When you get to the door you hold it open for him.

"Sorry again for just uh, coming up behind you like that." You apologize as he steps past you.

"It's fine, it worked out." He replies, nodding his head slightly, and walking away. You saw him drifting to the left down the wide staircase.

"Ah, Mr. Roronoa?" You call out, causing him to turn around. You smile and point to the right. "Unless you're running errands, the dojo's that way." You didn't stick around to see if he needed the help or not, stepping back into the library quickly.

You spent the rest of your shift distracted, but no one held it against you. Brook hovered around you a little, but he didn't pester you with questions. He spent most of his time intercepting people who came up to you with questions and directing them on your behalf. The old man was surprisingly quick when the occasion called for it. He had even told you to take the next day off before you had a chance to ask for it.

Such accommodations were to be expected, but the whole thing still felt a little surreal to you. Ever since the World Government had implemented arranged marriages, there had been a slew of TV shows and Movies that had depicted how awkward first impressions could be. Inevitably the two people would come to an understanding, given enough time and communication. It was, at its core, propaganda for the masses, to smooth over the whole situation.

Still, you found yourself replaying sitcom episodes in your head and listening to songs about enemies to lovers as you went about your evening once you got home. You weren't put off of Zoro entirely, but you felt apathetic toward things so far. You didn't really want to spend your life going through a routine that just happened to have someone else on the edges of it.

What unsettled you was that your first impression of him was that he would, like you, allow that very thing to happen. A listless life, with no direction and no momentum. The only saving grace would be the government's insistence that you have at least one child, and the energy and chaos of a child was enough to throw any family into motion.

Wild, unstable motion maybe, but life wouldn't be listless.

You soaked in the tub until the water started to cool, tossed on an old over-sized shirt and drifted off to sleep.

. . . . . .

The next day you let your day start slowly, had a light breakfast, and put on a simple dress before doing up your hair a little. You wanted to look nice, but you didn't want to go to the nines and show up to find everyone else in t-shirts and jeans. You slipped on a pair of smooth-fabric tight shorts under your dress, which made walking more comfortable and saved you from any embarrassing moments if your skirt went rogue. Plus, there was just enough pocket space for a bus pass, your id and house key.

Instead of heels you opted for what were essentially leather-topped sneakers. They looked nice enough for work, but they were delightfully comfortable. Most of your wardrobe was practicality over fashion, but you could still manage being fashionable. You made sure your socks were a little on the thicker side, if this was happening in a dojo, you'd need to take your shoes off and still keep your feet warm.

With one last check to make sure you were presentable you caught the bus to cover most of the distance to the dojo. You could feel someone staring at you while you were on the bus, but you did your best to ignore it. It was a short ride between your home and the dojo, but it would've been a long walk.

The grounds of the dojo were walled off, which meant the entire block was. It was more likely that, as the city had developed around the dojo, the wall had been raised to minimize distractions within. This led to there being a large entryway, enough for cars to go through when needed, with a side door for people to come and go through.

It was done well, honoring the origins of the dojo while still having a clean modern sense, as though it was welcoming the city instead of trying to reject it.

Standing outside the main entrance, looking horribly uncomfortable in a suit and tie, was a grumpy looking Zoro. You did your best to suppress the amused smile that was tugging at your lips as you got close enough for him to turn toward you. He seemed a little embarrassed that you'd caught him grumbling about the suit. In some ways, it looked good on him, in more ways though, it looked awkward on him.

"It seems you're more for function than fashion as well." You muse, trying to help ease the tension with levity.

He grunts, but his silence was a surprising response.

"If you want to lose the tie at least, I didn't exactly stick to tradition either." You admit, lifting up your skirt as he turns to face you. His face twists in shock for a split second before he realizes you were wearing shorts under your skirt. You couldn't help the small laugh that escapes you as your let your skirt fall back down.

"Here," you say, reaching for the tie. "Let me wear it. Then your father won't be able to argue, right?"

"How?" He questions, stepping back from you and loosening the tie himself.

You shrug. "Your Match Book gave me some idea, but I did a lot of research when I was looking to learn martial arts, to make sure I had a good teacher." You take the offered tie and slip it over your head. "There's a lot of weight given to tradition and history, which isn't a bad thing, but that's why I assumed your father didn't leave you much room to argue."

You let your hair down, so that it covers the loop of the tie, and covers your shoulders a little. This way you look like you're wearing a tie, and not a noose.

"There! And look, it doesn't even clash with my dress." You offer a smile. "Problem solved, yes?"

The door beside the gate opened and a rather severe looking man came into view. He was wearing a suit, and unlike with Zoro, the look suited him in many ways. It was as tight and disciplined as you imagined he was. The man's face was wholly unreadable, but contained neither anger nor irritation.

You bow, ignoring the tie dangling from you, and straighten with a smile. "Mr. Dracule, it's a pleasure to meet you."

"Miss (L/N), I'm glad you made it without issue." Mihawk's appearance and manner might be tight, but his voice was surprisingly smooth. "Please, come in."

"Thank you." You step inside as Mihawk steps aside. You turn to him after you've made room for Zoro to come in and smile as you hold onto the tie. "I hope you don't mind; I stole your son's tie when I arrived."

Zoro's ears went pink as he steps in and closes the door behind him, and the look Mihawk had been giving him melts away. He smiles at you, and the action is disarming, for the first time you think you might be able to imagine Zoro smiling.

"As long as it wasn't foisted upon you." Mihawk says pointedly, his gaze shifting to his grumpy son.

"Not at all," you assure him. "I was feeling a little under dressed and this simply makes us even."

Mihawk makes a noise that leaves you with the impression that he is simply accepting your explanation, despite not entirely believing it. You feel admonished, and almost start to apologize before he speaks up.

"Zoro, show Miss (L/N) to the tearoom." Mihawk prompts.

Zoro offers his arm to you without a word, and the level of etiquette brings a smile to your lips. You murmur a thanks and slip your arm through his. It was the most physical contact you'd had in years, and it was the first real contact you and Zoro had at all. He was warm, or you were warm, but there was no discomfort in that warmth.

Zoro leads you into the foyer, and you tuck your shoes away with the others you could see, putting on a pair of house slippers that had been provided, and stepping up into the hallway proper. You wait as Zoro does the same, and then leads you to the tearoom.

You were simultaneously relieved and disheartened to see a full table set up in the tearoom, western style chairs and all. It had been a long time since you attended a proper tea ceremony, and you were no longer as practiced at sitting properly for one. You could probably manage, but you'd be sore after. It would've been nice to get into the practice of it, but a first meeting wasn't the correct time to do so anyway.

The tea was delicious, and there was plenty of polite small talk. The whole point of a witnessed meeting was to try and shake off the awkwardness of first-time meetings. Generally, there were more than three people at the first meeting, but three was the minimum. You had no doubt that Dracule Mihawk was capable of keeping you and Zoro in check, no matter how things went.

After tea, Mihawk had Zoro take you on a small tour of the property. The landscaping was beautiful. There was a Zen Garden, a small western style flower garden in another area, and a green house in another location. You and Zoro opted to skip the green house, it was warm enough outside, the green house would just be humid on top of it all. There was a study and a small library, you were already in love with the place before that point, but the library was very well organized, and you gave your praise to whomever maintained it.

"A properly organized library is just relaxing." You muse as you leave the library behind and continue the tour.

"You sound like Mihawk-Sensei." Zoro replies, and you weren't sure if it was a compliment or not. He slides a door open, and it gives way to a large open room lined with tatami mats. No part of the property had been, by any stretch of the definition, messy, but the dojo proper seemed extra immaculate.

"Oh wow. Can I go in?" You question.

Zoro nods. "Sure."

You automatically slip your house slippers off before stepping onto the mats and walk slowly around the large open room. There are traditional burned wood planks that denote the Master, his assistants, and the students. The dojo is doing well, given the length of the roster. There are practical displays for shinai and bokken, and a few ceremonial displays that are likely true steel katanas.

Zoro is leaning in the doorway, just watching you move around the dojo. You're too absorbed in all the details of the room to notice anything more about him, but his gaze isn't making you uncomfortable.

"Is it rude to ask how old the dojo is?" You question, keeping your hands laced behind your back as you lean forward to read an inscription under a set of three katanas.

"The millennial celebration is in nine years." Zoro answers. "According to the official records."

"Mm. It's probably older than that then," you state straightening up. "It's good to celebrate what you can though."

Zoro grunts in response. You're starting to get used to it. It's his way of acknowledging that he's listening without prolonging a conversation he doesn't think needs to be prolonged. Time would tell if your assumption was correct, but there was nothing about him that made you feel he was duplicitous. He seemed like someone who didn't even want to waste time with the obvious, never mind wasting energy trying to hide who he was.

"Are you accepting new students?" You question half idly, half curiously, catching Zoro flinching slightly.

Mihawk answers, stepping into view, and entering into the dojo with you. "Are you interested in learning?"

You nod. "I haven't learned a weapon-centric style of martial arts before, but there's a practicality in getting back into the practice."

"Oh? What have you studied before?" Mihawk prompts.

"Tai-chi and Judo. The former more than the latter." You admit, walking over to two of them. "When I was completing my education to become a librarian, I didn't have the time to continue consistently, and after that I fell into my new job and hadn't looked for a new place to get back into things."

"Did you ever compete?" Mihawk asks, and you were starting to get the distinct impression he was asking on Zoro's behalf. Maybe everything he'd done today had been on the young man's behalf. As far as you were concerned that made him a good dad.

You shake your head. "I learned for self-defense and to keep in shape. Admittedly, the idea of hurting someone on accident during a match made me too nervous to try, and yeah I get that if I'm going to use it as self-defense someone is going to get hurt. But that's... different."

"Mm." Mihawk acknowledges shortly. "Your assumption being that in a match, your opponent doesn't mean to harm you."

"Yeah... Ah, I hope that's not rude of me?"

"To some, maybe. To others, no." He answers honestly. "It depends on the ideology of the person in question."

"Then... how would each of you take it?"

Zoro clicks his tongue and looks away with a scowl, and that was really all the answer you needed from him.

Mihawk offers you a small smile. "We are of a similar mind on this, but I don't begrudge you for your feelings."

"If he has learned his lessons well, then he doesn't either." Mihawk adds after a moment's pause.

Zoro grunts but didn't say anything else on the topic. "You've seen everything, are you hungry?"

"Yes, if it's not too much trouble. I had a small breakfast and the snacks from the tea seem to be wearing off." You answer with a strained smile, putting the house slippers back on.

The rest of the afternoon went well enough. You learned that Zoro wasn't much of a cook, but the meal of the day was a joint effort between him and his father. It was good, you weren't a picky eater, but it was as good as you could do, you were sure.

Light conversation continued, and things started to get a little more personal at the end of it.

"If it's uncomfortable Miss (L/N), you don't have to answer, but you brought neither family nor a friend with you today." Mihawk begins, "According to the Match Book, I can understand the former."

You nod, your practiced smile covering your face as you respond. "I'm sure the details were a little vague in the book, but I don't mind explaining." You take in a breath, no matter how often you told this story, it was always at least a little uncomfortable. "My biological parents were murdered by Kuro when I was five."

There was a lot hanging in that sentence, though neither Zoro or Mihawk reacted. Kuro had been a prolific serial killer 20 years ago, and everyone who had survived his bloody assaults had been believed to be cursed. It was simply referred to as being Kursed when people wrote it down, but the heavy emphasis on the word made it remarkable when spoken as well.

Kuro slaughtered nearly 100 people during the decade he was active, but he had double that in actual victims. The people who survived his attacks seemed to have a terrible aura of bad luck surrounding them, and people around those survivors seemed to die at an abnormally high rate. Sometimes accidents, sometimes disease, it wasn't like people around the survivors were murdered, but someone made a connection at some point and the idea of the curse was born.

You were, frustratingly, part of that statistic. "I was adopted some years later, and when I was sixteen my adoptive parents died in a car accident. After that I kept to myself. I petitioned the courts and was able to have myself marked as an adult at 16 and now here I am."

"I see." Mihawk says evenly, after a moment's quiet consideration.

You kept your same practiced smile. "I'm sure you can petition for a Rematch because of this, if you want."

Zoro's default scowl deepens, and you were surprised how neutral his original expression was in comparison. "Rematch? Over some stu-."

"Roronoa." Mihawk interrupts forcefully.

Zoro looks away, seething quietly.

"I doubt such action will be necessary." Mihawk responds. "My apologies for causing you discomfort Miss (L/N)."

"Oh, no apology needed." You assure him, and it was true. You had been dealing with the plethora of ways that people reacted to you being a survivor of Kuro's rage. 

The man was still on the loose, though most assumed he was too old to continue, since it had been some years since the last confirmed victim.

[lavender-sheperd]

Info dump about feeling alone n stuff

So I'll start this off by saying my mom was never really present like she should've been, she's got a few chronic illnesses and she's disabled, a lot of my childhood she was in bed, asleep, busy, or some other reason that she couldn't give me attention. I'm sure we did lots of things together but what I remember most is her not being present.

I have to brothers but for most of my life the older one has been mean and the younger one was a complete brat so I didn't have any connection to them.

When I was really little (4-5?) my mom was moving us 45 minutes away and would usually go up for a few days and come back to town for one or so. Now already that was hard for me because she was the only person I knew, no friends, no friendly neighbors, no dad. She'd leave me and my brothers with her mom who is an immigrant (doesn't speak a ton of English) and who honestly disliked us a lot. She refused to let us call out mom even if she said it was okay, she would watch us and criticize everything we did, she was very emotionally cold. It was a lot harder than it should've been for me and I kinda thought about how I missed my mom constantly. One time my mom came back for a lil bit and told me I could come with her, but my dumb lil self was being rude so she just left me. Now that's fine, but for me it was: mom is home > I can go with her!!! > Say something > mom is mad > says I can't come > drives away > without her for days

Which for a small child was really damaging

Then, later my mom said we were moving a state away and me and my brothers had to stay with her parents while she packed up the house

That meant that 8 year old me had to stay in a new state with people I barely knew

My mom would be in California for a few weeks and we'd stay in her parents house which was cold, and empty. She didn't like having the heater on so the house was cold, didn't like decorating so it kinda had the bare minimum. No toys, no books, 30 minutes of tv a day, not allowed to really play in the yard. We really didn't go anywhere like parks or anything, maybe the McDonald's play place once a week. So that left a lot of time for me to cry about how I missed my mom. My grandma was still as apathetic as ever and wouldn't let us call her. My grandpa was a bit better but they were bad parents and didn't know how to interact with kids at all. This went on for only like 2 months but it felt like an eternity for me as a kid

Next, my mom eventually stayed in my grandparents house, she's always stayed up late and slept late (like 4-7 am to 1-2 pm) so she'd stay in bed a lot of the day. My grandma watched me like a hawk so if I tried to go to my mom's room to see her my grandma would get mad at me and once again, refused to let us see her even if our mom said it was okay. That went on for a summer.

When we moved out she was still sick and stayed in bed a lot or was on her phone or working, and often she'd tell us she was going to run a quick errand and be gone for 4 or 5 hours

Think "I'm going to run these donations to the thrift store and that's all" at 3 and then at 8 when it's dark and I've kinda accepted that she probably got in a car accident she'd come home acting like that was completely normal

Me and my brothers had no way to contact her so when she was gone she was gone and we just had to wait, she'd often drop us off at our grandparents and we didn't know how long we'd stay and couldn't contact her

When we were moving again she's leave me and my brother, or just be at the house so she could fit more in the car. She'd say she'd be right back and hours would pass in an empty house with no way to contact her. I remember a time that the only thing in the house was the TV, a few chairs and a towel, and she was gone for probably 4 hours again, it was 9 pm and cold and so the only thing I could really do was push the chairs together and use the towel as a blanket.

She used to leave us at the library after school, or our grandparents, or the park (at one point our school was a 30 minute drive) and we'd just have to wait, if we could call her she probably wouldn't answer, if she answered she'd lie and say she was on her way.

One summer she'd go out with a friend every few nights at probably 9 pm, 1 am would roll around and my younger brother would refuse to go to bed until she was home so we'd call her. Never picked up. That whole summer she'd always say that she didn't realize her phone was dead, it was on do not disturb and she didn't realize, it was being weird and she didn't get the call. Every single time.

While a lot of this is pretty small, as I child I literally only knew like 4 people so it was a huge thing that I suddenly couldn't contact my only person.

Anyways that's the (maybe) whole list of reasons why I now cry when I have to be alone, why not being able to talk to people makes me so upset, why friends not responding for weeks makes me so upset, why people needing space feels like a punishment, why not being able to contact people makes me panic, why I have Mommy issues, why I have daddy issues, and probably some other stuff, attachment issues?

I don't know why it all affected me so much but it really did

[somerandomgrl]

I was showering and I remembered a lot of things my mom has said to me in the past.

I'll list them so I can finally forget them, and there's no specific order cuz I have no concept of time, therefore I can't remember when any of them happened.

1 - I told her she wasn't being fair cuz I wanted more freedom, she told me that life wasn't fair. I was stuck taking care of my newborn nephew and my older sister.

2 - She started suspecting I was a lesbian (which I'm not but I'm still part of the LGBT community), and she offered to take me to get snacks and drive us to some parking lot to lecture me about it, saying homosexuals were sick people, that she understood but it wasn't natural.

3 - She told me that I had no right to be sad or angry because she and my dad gave us everything to my sister and me, which is not true, the amount of times I didn't eat or had to live off sandwich at that time because bread and ham was everything I could afford... I was 16 and plain ham sandwiches are still one of my favorite foods.

4 - My sister has no sense of responsibility, so having a baby was pretty difficult for both of us since my mom was always traveling and my dad moved to another city. I complained about my sister being awfully irresponsible with her kid, and how I always ended up taking care of him even if I was burning in fever (which was worrying to me since he was a baby) and she, my mom, told me that I had to be more understanding and change because my sister would never do it. Today I don't live near my baby, I have a niece with developing issues that my nephew doesn't have and they still refuse to acknowledge how big of a job I did raising my baby boy. Still both of them are everything to me and the reason I'm still here, even if no one knows that.

5 - I failed in school more times than anyone should in their life, and my mom was a top student... Even if I got points over a perfect score she would tell me I could have done it better. Not only that she made sure to tell me once that her love wasn't unconditional, that I have to work harder.

6 - She says she supports me as a part of the LGBTQ community, but the moment I say something about it she looks annoyed and awkward, I can't talk to her about literally anything unless we're outside and she wants to look like a good mom, or unless it's some gossip. She sees us as entertainment, that until my homophobic dad and/or sister are here, then she sides with them saying it's not natural and kids shouldn't have two moms or two dads because that'd confuse them. Guys... Out there people actually have same sex relationships and kids have same sex parents, I think it would be even more confusing to them if they hide reality.

7 - When I told her I was probably autistic, hence neurodivergent, she told me that it was okay and she understood, that she thought I was a very high functioning autistic person and that it was fine because she knew how to deal with me already. She's never done that at all, every time I had to adapt to them and if I couldn't she would call me rebellious, even though I was never really problematic. Two days ago I told her I had social anxiety, not only I've had it my whole life, it got worse after a lot of times I've been harassed and almost abused, and she asked God to give her more patience because she was tired of people from my generation being so "weak" and having so many mental issues.

8 - She said once that she couldn't trust me because I didn't get the time to clean the house for her party because I had to run some errands for said party...

9 - Yet she made me walk an hour in a new city to give her her phone she forgot at home. She always had a car and she wouldn't have made more than 20 minutes. That same thing happened with her laptop.

10 - As I said before, I'm not a good student and I have never been. This means I got caught often skipping classes or forgetting my homework at home. One of those times my parents were actually called and only my dad went to the appointment, she said she didn't want to go because she was sleeping. Same thing happened with a homework I urgently needed to pass and, honestly, that wouldn't even bother me if it wasn't for the previous point. But I have to always be there for her even if It's not the same for me.

That's everything I can remember for now.... I'll probably update this list in the future, hoping my resentment towards her disappears one day. I know I'm probably being unfair but, from the moment they say they don't love you because you're not working hard enough and you're doing your best everyday, everything changes and something breaks inside you.

[ghostzzy]

i’m not enjoying today.

[casikototmblr]

Are We Lost? - Pre Cult Kai.

Summary: Reader goes on a spontaneous road trip with Kai but things don't quite go to plan.

A/N: Inspired by a prompt by @clean-prompts​. I’ve re-watched Cult again so that explains the imagines, lol.

Word count : 1,320.

Baby...C'mon, wake up! I made breakfast and stuff." Kai spoke softly as he entered the sun-lit room, armed with a tray full to the brim of pancakes stacked with a fountain of golden maple syrup poured on top and orange juice galore. He waited patiently for a couple of seconds, struggling to keep the tray full of delicious food balanced. Despite his failed attempt to wake you up, Kai placed the tray of food on the bedside table and got into bed beside you; his arm quickly found its way to your waist and pulled you closer to him as Kai started making quick work of planting soft kisses on the soft skin of your neck. You began to stir as the smell of the pancakes filled up your lungs and the soft kisses on your neck sent goosebumps everywhere on your body.

"D-Do I smell pancakes?" You asked half-asleep as you turned around to face Kai. You opened your eyes to look up at him before planting a soft kiss on his lips. 

"Mhm, I woke up a while ago and thought I'd make some pancakes for you," Kai replied as you slowly sat yourself up in the bed, readjusting the bedsheets as you did so. Kai grabbed the tray from the bedside table and waited for you to get comfy before placing the tray of food gently on your lap. You studied the food as you swiftly picked up the cutlery and began to tuck into the fluffy pancakes. 

"Thank you, baby." You spoke softly to Kai as he got out of bed and made his way to the wardrobe. You watched him as he opened the wooden door of the wardrobe and grabbed out a pair of jeans and a white top.

"I was thinking we could go on a road trip, I have a place in mind," Kai stated as you dipped a chunk of pancake in the maple syrup before eating it.

"I thought you were spending the day running errands for your Dad." You responded as you took a sip of the sweetish orange juice. Kai began to get undressed, changing out of his old frat shirt and into the shirt he picked from the wardrobe.

"Yeah that was the plan but..he's in one of his 'asshole' moods according to Mom, which doesn't make a change to how he normally is." Kai quickly answered with a scoff as he slipped into his jeans as you dipped the last piece of pancake on the plate in the last of the syrup and ate it. 

"Mhm, fair enough but don't you think he'll mind?" You asked softly as you got up and walked over to Kai. Kai enclosed his arms around you, pulling you into a firm hug as you looked up at him, running your fingers through his hair. 

"I suppose but it wouldn't make a difference anyway, besides we haven't done anything together in a while," Kai said as you cupped his face in your hands and looked in his soft brown eyes. 

"Okay, I'll get changed into something and then we can get going to where it is you'd like to take me." You suggested. Kai gave you a soft kiss on your lips, you kissed him back leaving the kiss to linger for a little while. 

TIME SKIP - 1 HOUR LATER.

You pulled the straps of the black slip dress onto the tops of your bare shoulders as you examined the dress in the mirror. Normally you'd wear the dress with a shirt underneath but today was far too hot for that. You grabbed your favourite pair of shoes and slipped them on as you gave yourself one final look in the mirror making sure everything was okay before you left the bedroom and ran downstairs to find Kai. 

"Kai?" You asked as you grabbed a bottle of water from the kitchen. You walked outside to the front of your house to where Kai was.

"Hey baby," Kai replied as you walked over to the open boot of the truck. Kai stopped putting the bags in the boot as he looked you up and down, his mouth pretty much wide open. He might as well be drooling at this point. 

"You look really...Wow...beautiful." Kai added as he lifted the flap on the boot up. 

"Thanks baby, we ready to go?" You suggested as you sorted your dress out. 

Kai agreed as he double-checked the boot before getting in the driver's side. You quickly followed and got in the passenger side.

Within a couple of minutes, the truck was in motion. 

TIME SKIP - 3 HOURS LATER.

"Kai, it's okay if we're lost." You told Kai as you passed the same green sign for the third time in a row. You knew you were lost but Kai just didn't want to admit it.

"We're not lost, I swear." Kai insisted again for the third time. "I know where I'm going baby," Kai continued as he pulled over on the side of the road. You clutched his hand that was on the gear stick.

"Babe...Are we lost?" You asked yet again as you rubbed the top of his hand with your thumb. 

"No! I know exactly where we are...I think." Kai stated as he looked over at you. "Just two secs babe," Kai added as he got out of the truck, leaving the door open behind him. He strolled to the back of the truck and looked around, you watched him in the wing mirror with a confused look on your face. He quickly stepped back and got back in the car.

"Okay, fine. We are lost." Kai finally admitted, throwing his hands in defeat in the air. 

"Oh okay..." You replied as you watched Kai place his head and hands on the steering wheel and sigh. 

"I'm sorry baby..." Kai mumbled as he looked over at you in defeat. "Today's gone terrible." He added weakly as he buried his face in his hands.

"It hasn't at all, I promise. There has to be a gas station somewhere around here, why don't we go get some snacks and chill out in the back for a little while?" You added as you placed your hand on Kai's back softly.

"Ok, okay. It's better than nothing." Kai replied as he put the keys back in the ignition and started the car. You two, after 20 minutes of driving, eventually found a little shabby gas station with a broken sign. You and Kai ventured into the gas station and spent more than what a reasonable human being would normally spend on snacks. You came out with all sorts: a dozen Twinkie bars, at least 3 different flavours of Hershey bars, more than 2 packs of Jolly Ranchers and a 6 pack of assorted crisps. You took your 30$ worth of food, which was definitely a rip-off according to Kai, back to the truck as you both hopped into the open boot. You took the blankets and pillows from the back of the truck and pulled them through the now-open partition window and arranged the blankets and pillows so you and Kai could relax and get fat together. 

You laid down in Kai's arm as the sun began to set, the sky blending into an array of beautiful colours in front of you to see. Kai kissed the top of your head.

"I'm sorry about today," Kai said softly as you moved the empty Twinkie wrappers. 

"You've got nothing to be sorry for, this has been one of the best days ever!" You exclaimed, hoping to reassure Kai.

"Really?" He asked as you looked at him intently. You nodded as you gave him a kiss.

"The best day of my life..."

[hopefuljoon]

BST: Chapter 2

A/N: Sorry this chapter is a bit shorter than most because it’s so important to me. Other than that, I plan on making it longer in the next chapter to make it up to you.

(Spacing is wack, this is what I have in mind for the back part of the house)

Credit goes to the respective owner of this image Miami MLS

Previous:

"You do realize...you don't have to do this, right babe?" Hoseok whispered out against your ear. You shivered and turned slowly around in his arms as he adjusted his hold on you again. The sight from afar made it looked so awfully domestic, it'd melt even the coldest heart.

"I know but it's the least I could do" you rasped out against his chest before turning around, getting back to work on putting the mixture onto the warming pan.

Even as you move about pouring the pancake mixture onto the warming pan, Hoseok's hands continue to linger on your hips. Ten minutes had passed and before long, you heard soft snoring sound coming from behind you, including the sudden extra weight on your back. He had fallen asleep while nuzzling into your body in the early hours. He must have been out late, doing errands for Yoongi, again. You sigh knowingly but quickly finished whipping up a batch of pancake, respectively placing equal amounts on 7 plates that you had set out earlier. You turned off the electric stove and cautiously turned in Hoseok's arm, in fear of waking up the sunshine. You place your arms around him to hold him upright, at that moment, you notice a pair of gleaming brown eyes mirroring yours.

It was Jungkook, in all his morning glory of ruffled hair and wrinkled sleepwear. He must have had a restful sleep but he deserves it, you mused. Mafia work often leads to a sudden rush of adrenaline, making the person excited and yet when it decreases to normal, they are left tired.

"Want some help with that?" he eyed Hoseok in your arms then returned his gaze to you, eyes sparkling with amusement. You smiled at him and whispered, please, loud enough for him to hear but not wake up Hoseok. Jungkook nodded and walked up to you, gently removing Hoseok from you. Thank you Kookie, you murmur and smile at him. He returned it and began to walk towards the marble staircase in order to ascend to Hoseok's room.

You circle around the counter to set down each member's plates. The table had been set earlier by the housemaids while you were cooking. You did one last round to serve your brother, at the head of the table, his plate before bending down to hug him. He blushes and stutters out a "hey!...not in front of them..." in your arm as the room roars with the sound of giggles from his fellow consigliere. Their eyes filled with adoration and love for their leader. Eventually, you deemed the hug was long enough to show your love, gratitude for the countless times he protected and stay with you throughout the night full of recurring bad dreams, and a little bit of teasing. After all, Yoongi had to keep up an image of the fearless, powerful, and ruthless mafia leader but within the safe confinement of your arms and the house, he could show you and his inner members the sides of which he must lock away deep within himself. Otherwise, if he ever let those softer and weaker sides of him show in public, his family (mainly you as all your family members had been either killed or assassinated), consigliere and everything he had and obtained will be jeopardized. He won't risk it, not even for the biscuit because you are the last remaining treasure that he has.

10 Years Prior

Growing up, you were spoiled rotten with girly princess dresses, diamond tiaras, and lived in a mansion by the oceanside. Your family, which consisted of your mother and father, adored and loved you. You were the center of jealousy for every girl in school and in town. For that reason, your parents often never let you out of the house or play with other children of your age. They deemed that the housemaids and butler were to be your playmates and that the house would be your playground.

Even so, you don't often get the chance to wander around your own house. You were either hustled to the study room or the grand library built within the house to study. Your parents had hired private tutors in order for you to excel in school without them having to worry. Turns out, you don't disappoint. You often had a knack for having the ability to memorize a large sum of information in a short time frame too. You also outperformed quick maths calculations faster than any other students in your year.

You had just finished your study earlier than scheduled so your tutor left you in the care of the housemaids who you've come to love. It's nearly lunchtime so they were going to go prepare and serve the food soon. You finally have the free time to yourself to run around and explore your own home.

30 minutes into the exploration, you stumble down into the basement of the house which was guarded by a large metal door. There were strange button pads with numbers on the right side of the door. It looked super soft and squishy so you decided to jam on random numbers, it wouldn't hurt, right? After 3-4 random jamming of numbers for 13 digits, the sound of the alarm began to blare. You quickly covered your ears, closed your eyes and hunched into a ball in fear. Praying to whatever god that was listening that it would stop and you wouldn't get caught and not get in trouble. Suddenly, you felt as if you were floating and the alarm sound ceased. You opened your eyes to see your mother standing by the security padlock before grabbing onto you to drag you to your feet. She was furious, the fire blazing in her eyes told you so. "I told you...to NEVER come down here. You could be in danger! Why won't you just LISTEN to me?" She spat.

"I'm sorry...I didn't mean to...I finished my studies early so I decided to explore the house and got lost.." you answered casting your eyes to the ground while digging your hands into your dress pocket and fidget nervously. Your mother must have picked up on your fear and began to soften her voice. "It's fine...I will forgive you this time. Don't make the same mistake again...". At that time, your mother had felt pity for her own daughter getting lost in her own home. The mansion so large a size but the loneliness remains. After all, you had no siblings of your own. It was something that you often think about at school seeing other children act with their sisters or brothers.

You woke up one Saturday morning at 4:30 AM by a soft knock with your mother entering your room but your father smiled and lingered by the door. "Good morning little one, how was your sleep? Mommy and Daddy will have to go out to do business today. Will you be good and stay inside the house today, sweets?" she asked while walking over to your bed and lightly kissed your temple. "Yes, I'll see you soon when you return, mom", you replied, smiling while looking up at your beloved mother. "Then it's time we get going my dear,'' she replied before turning and walking back to her husband's side, tears slowly brimming her eyes.

What your younger and naive self didn't know then was that it was going to be the last time you saw your parents smiling happily, being alive, and well. You never wondered even for a second, how the mansion you live in, the expenses, clothing, and jewelry were obtained through their laundered and bloodied money. Looking back, you had just figured they were Old Money. What you didn't know then and innocently assumed would come back and take its toll on your family.

Previous | Next

[pbandjesse]

My ears are swolllen again. I hate that it keeps happening. It is unacceptable. I already was sick one day last week. No more!!

Its been a good and restful day. The overnight last night could have gone better. Like my group was wonderful. The kids were really sweet and the parents were helpful. Jordan and Jordan both had trouble staying on that schedule so I had to keep vamping and coming up with stuff for my kids. Eventually we were playing night in the museum in the Pearl Harbor room. Because I couldn't think of anything else. Thankfully the kids really enjoyed it and even asked if we could play it again in the morning. And because they were so good and they finish their breakfast we did go and play a couple rounds before they went and saw the gun mount.

But last night was pretty stressful. The parents in the one group were so mean to us. Particularly Tatiana and Maya. They were like snapping their fingers at them and calling them the wait staff. Which they are not. And it was just really really rude. And I'm pretty sure because they're both women of color it was also slightly racist. If not entirely racist.

But we ended the night and we were all glad to be done. I went down to the CPO and they had set up the tables to celebrate Jordan Brooks's new job. And I was like oh it's so cute. And then come to find out one of the tables was decorated for me. Because my birthday is next week. And then got me a card and candy and stuff. It was so cute. My also got me a wrap from Chick-fil-A which I just remembered I left in the fridge. So that's sad. But it was so thoughtful of them. The card also makes me laugh a lot because they all spelled my name wrong and so every single one of the Jesse has the I scribbled out in it. It was very cute and I was just very very appreciative.

Normally on overnights I'll go to bed around 11. But I was having such a nice time that I ended up staying with them in the mess hall until after midnight. My brother ended up texting me around midnight and I decided that that was when I need to go to sleep. I had a really good time talking to everyone though. Jordan finally cleared up what the line is between grave robbing and Archeology. Turns out it's 50 years. And then I went to go try to sleep.

Try is the imperative work here. I normally sleep with my headphones in. But because my ears have been so swollen I picked up a cheap pair of over-the-ear headphones from the clearance section at Dick Blick. They cost like $4. And while they work I sleep on my side. So trying to sleep with over-the-ear headphones on just was not working. So I was pretty uncomfortable. I was half asleep and half awake pretty much all night. I would wake up almost every hour. Which is pretty normal for me on overnights but it was still annoying. At least I was warm. Or warm enough in the pajamas that I wore.

My alarm went off at 5 and no one else in the room was getting up. And so I just decided to go wash my face put my sweatpants on underneath my work pants. Put a little bit of makeup on. And then I went and laid back down. I gave myself 15 more minutes and wait until I at least forever when I was starving. I did not want to be in charge of making all the food. But I also would feel like a jerk if I went up to the kitchen first and didn't start the food.

I was still the first one up there. I got the breakers on at least and then the girls came up and we all were tired and cold. But we tried our best.

We decided to do the morning where I would stay with the breakfasts all three of them. Jordan would do all the engine room tours and Brooks would do all the gun mount tours. And that was fine. The first breakfast was the group that was particularly rude. And we all kind of look down on that because that was also the breakfast where we had the most trouble getting the food done. The eggs would not cook. Mostly because it was so cold in the kitchen that the stove was having trouble getting hot. And the coffee wasn't finishing. And that parent that was sort of semi in charge was just so rude about it. Telling us how disgusting everything was. And honestly you have a bad attitude and I don't feel as bad as I normally would. I told him I agree with him about the food and I'm sorry that he had to deal with some less-than-ideal circumstances and here is a survey and you can totally write down all your complaints.

Thankfully the two other breakfasts went well. The eggs cooked way better or the girls had put them on the stove. Took them out of the bag is completely. Which is always risky but they knocked out of park. And everything went much better from then on. They ate nine boxes of cereal. And they all filled out their surveys. And besides a couple little pickups with the rudeness of the first group we finish strong. And we got some really nice compliments we were all very surprised by that. I'm not 5 by name compliments in the surveys. That is the most I've ever gotten. It was so nice to hear those. My group really liked me and it made me really happy.

It took a really long time for us to pull everything together. Clean up and all that. But we worked as a team and we got it done. James and Sam from over on torsk and they put all their stuff away and then it was decided that we would all go to IHOP.

Attend me James and Sam walked over. I have to get a small table. But then it took almost a 40 minutes how to get a table and then for Jordan and Tatiana to get over from Taney. I have no idea what they were doing. I think it was combination of mopping and finishing paperwork but still. I was very hungry and tired.

Food was good. It was nice being with James even though I could feel the tension radiating off of him. After we all ate we all went our separate ways. Me and James went upstairs to Marshalls. He got new sneakers which he desperately needed. Did not get new pants but the sneakers were very nice. We still cannot find him boots or sandals for that matter. But at least he has sneakers that are not falling apart now.

We went over to that make up section and I got new eyeliner and a heated eyelash curler. There's only $3 I'm fascinated to see how it works tomorrow. I also got a bicycle repair kit that was on clearance for 4 bucks so that was cool. It came in a nice little tin and it says established 1991 which I thought it was me because that's the year I was born.

Actually realized earlier this week that this year is a special birthday. Because I was born on to 2 / 17 / 91 and this year it's 2/17 / 19! Like I just think that's so cool.

After Marshall me and James said goodbye. We got our bikes and I had it on. It was a little bit of rough going. I'm in really bad shape right now. Between being sick and not stretching enough and it just being cold I am getting out of breath really easily. Something I'm definitely working on right now. I got home and it was around 12:30. I took a shower. I felt so much better after that. I am packed my bag and I fit sweet pea and then I laid in bed and watch TV for a little while.

I fell asleep somewhere around 2. It was pretty good rest. I didn't set an alarm. Because I didn't really need to be anywhere today. Didn't have to do anything. I technically worked a 10-hour day so I'm not going to feel bad about it. But I got up at 4:30. Will not up but I was awake. And I decided that I would stay in bed until the sun went down all the way. And then I would have to get up and do something. So I laid in bed for a while. Clean on my phone. And then I got up and I grabbed the fabric bag that just be from work gave me. And some paper. And I worked on selling some stuff. Working on a pattern. James is going to let me bring my sewing machine to keep it as apartment so that I can try to sew things there. But it was fun just sitting here and sewing for a while.

I made pasta sides for dinner. It was very nice. I made some outfits for the week and I played with sweet pea. I tried on the dress that I'm wearing for Valentine's Day and figure it out pain that I'm going to wear with it and what shoes I'm wearing. And I really just been hanging out since then. I can't believe it's almost 11:00. But the way my day was laid out I guess it makes sense. I'll probably go to bed in the next hour or so I can get back on a normal schedule. I'm hoping to wake up in the morning and do some yoga and go and run a couple errands. I want to make a PowerPoint for the kids. But I'm not that worried about that. I hope you guys all sleep well tonight and stay warm. Be kind to each other. Good night