#it would be a sign of a marked improvement in your demeanor

[the-cosmic-cauldron]

Astrology Observations 08/01/2024

Sun and Ascendant (Rising Sign) Personalities

☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️

The Sun and Ascendant combination is important because it crafts together who you are precisely so let’s look at the combinations.

Disclaimer: If you do not see your sign combination you can ask ( reply) for yours and I will respond ☺️

🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️

Aries Sun + Taurus Rising

The Aries energy would dominate in this combination. This combination makes the individual ambitious to make their mark in this world. This persons words can cut deep, they are aggressive with a no-nonsense approach to life and their standards are extremely high. Once they have a desire, they go after it with strength and stamina. They are very protective of those they love. They do not do well if they’re not in the lead and they are like a solid boulder when they do not want to do something.

Taurus Sun+ Gemini Rising

The Gemini energy will dominate. This individual will have many hobbies and interests. They can be the person who desires or has more than one stream of income. They can be incredibly creative and multi-talented. These individuals are gifted with writing and they can communicate their ideas a lot easier because the Gemini energy is filtered through the Taurus and vice versa. They may find themselves changing career paths, friend groups, residence, and aesthetics a lot through their life. These people are very sexual and erotic.

Gemini Sun + Cancer Rising

The Cancer energy will dominate. This individual will find themselves constantly moving their goal posts, changing their mind, being inconsistent. They will have a lot of friends and people who enjoy their company. These people are like psychologists and can read people very well. They are also prone to venting and talking about how they feel a lot. They can overreact a lot. They absorb so much information that they can get headaches or anxiety especially when around others. These people have very creative minds and can truly help bring such fascinating ideas to this world, they will struggle with stamina and follow-through which isn’t their strong suit.

Cancer Sun+ Leo Rising

The Leo energy will dominate. These individuals are very image conscious, any slight remark to them wounds them easily. They need to feel “liked” and their desire for other people around them is strong. They may take people not liking them hard because they are so likeable they are charming, kind, people with big hearts and positive energy. They can find it hard to change their perspective or how they do things. Their need for stability is strong and they may have a cool and unfazed demeanor. They enjoy positive people who are caring. They need to feel loved or they suffer immensely.

Leo Sun+ Virgo Rising

The Virgo energy dominates. This individual strives to be the best at everything they do. They will not want attention for anything, unless they feel they are doing their best or succeeding. Very hard on themselves. They may find it hard to admit when they are wrong and struggle to express their emotions. They may feel all their flaws are on display. These people are detail-oriented and very picky. These people are hard to please and do not do well in submissive positions. They yearn for success and are obsessed with their image and health. Always trying to improve but extremely generous.

Virgo Sun+ Libra Rising

Libra energy dominates. These people are aesthetic people, neat freaks, the one that always has to look good. The person who can be perfect on the outside and chaotic internally. Stuck in their head and feeling pulled in different directions, they can find it hard to feel grounded. These individuals do not handle issues or problems well either ignoring them or people-pleasing and not being authentic on their feelings. They may feel uncomfortable expressing issues with others or being truthful. These are the teachers pet, parents favorite kid, and well-liked at work. A lot of superficial relationships with not many people not knowing the real you. These people have a very high standards.

Libra Sun + Scorpio Rising

Scorpio energy dominates. These people are very alluring, something about their aura pulls you in. They come off as cool, sexy, charming, beautiful. These people can be very popular and attract a lot of attention from romantic suitors. They can see into people like no other. Don’t try hiding anything from them. They will go out of their way to get what they want and to enjoy their life. Very kinky and sexual, they are open to experimenting in the bedroom. They know how to create diverse friendships, they can be lighthearted and deep. They can be incredibly sensitive, desiring creative outlets to channel such strong energy internally. These are the kind of people who may hide away when they’re depressed, stressed, or having a hard time in life.

Scorpio Sun + Sagittarius Rising

The Sagittarius energy dominates. These are very resilient people, very strong-willed, and mentally enduring. They have strong personalities as their aura and personality is strong. A lot of people come to this combination for their opinion, wisdom, or to just talk. This individual has a lot of confidence and doesn’t like to give-up. Even through hardships they always come out on top. These are the people who will know you so well and they are also very understanding of their own self. They can be very direct in their talking so sometimes people may think they are mean or rude. But they love a good laugh. This person is a life-long learner that needs to stray at times to spend time exploring their inner world and feeling free.

Sagittarius Sun + Capricorn Rising

The Capricorn energy dominates. These individuals try their best to create the life they desire. Natural manifestors they bring their ideas to life. If you say they can’t do it, they will show they can. They are passionate towards life and desire to create a utopian world. Their diligence to taking action and working towards their goals is admirable. They may trip up on their way, fueled by excitement and impulsivity, but they truly know how to get their shit together. They will want to live lavish and enjoy spending money as much as making it. Open-minded but prefer for only a few to know them more deeply. Very sexual but who would know, you like to show that to only those who deserve that side of you. To these individuals their life serves a higher purpose.

Capricorn Sun + Aquarius Rising

The Aquarius energy dominates. These individuals can seem unbothered, serious, or boring. They may have a unique look to them whether through their fashion, hair, or physical features. They won’t be big talkers upon first impression. They will not come across fiery or emotional, very calm people. They have large ideals and no times for games so they cut a lot of fun and pleasure out of their life to reach their goals. These people feel the weight of the world on them and they take responsibilities serious. They need space in their relationships and may go through different relationships throughout their life before finding someone who matches their energy or they just don’t care about dating. Very intelligent people but a lot of people may considered them boring or weird.

Aquarius Sun + Pisces Rising

The Pisces energy dominates. These individuals are the true definition of in your own world. They may be hard to even connect to at times as they march to the beat of their own drum and are quirky. These people enjoy living life through rose-colored glasses and doesn’t enjoy the negative and darker sides of life. Very big imaginations, their mind is a movie and portal to other dimensions. They may be silent a lot of the time, daydreaming, drifting off, or actually sleep. These people do not like hard work, mean people, or routines. A strong intuition and can be isolationist at times.

Pisces Sun+ Aries Rising

The Aries energy dominates. These people are dreamers that will fight for their dreams and ideals. If you tell them they are unrealistic they will simply say “ speak for yourself”. These people can appear youthful with so much wisdom. They can be so self-sacrificing to those around them and feel pain so intensely. These individuals build energy before taking action, they still need time to sit back and fall into different portals of their mind. They can be quite impulsive doing things based on their intuition and impulse. They can be popular because they are compassionate, bold, and full of drive. They would love spiritual sex, sex that ascends the human bodies.

Cancer Sun + Aries Rising

The Aries energy dominate. These people are quick to react without thinking. They always feel intuitively and struggle with rationality. These are self-focused people. They look out for their best interest. Loners. These people can have emotional outbursts but they tend to suppress their emotions to not be perceived as weak. These people go through a lot of mood changes and are quite ambitious. The world is their playground and thus they like to play. They usually prefer to dominate, but they can also be submissive when it works to their advantage. They may enjoy intimate closeness but not for long as they will be off doing something solo sooner than later.

Aries Sun + Capricorn Rising

The Capricorn energy will dominate. Success is all that matters to these people. Everything they do must be successful, they have no room to play games. They do not talk in circles, they give it to others straight. They will be meticulous in who is in their circle because you have to be on their path to success or you’re getting cut. Extremely loyal, once you’re locked in with this combination they are in it. This is a sign that will confront you, they don’t bullshit or lie, if they don’t want to discuss they will not. No one has power over them as they are their ultimate authority. These people do not like weak and passive people or people with no goals. They are very sexual and have lots of stamina in the bedroom. They may face a lot of challenges but they are strong and can whether any storm.

Taurus Sun + Leo Rising

The Leo energy will dominate. Telling these individuals what to do will get you cursed out. They need everything in their life to be high quality. Their way or the highway kind of people. They won’t typically get angry but when they do you better watch out. They are opinionated and they will tell you how things should be quickly. These people are very charming, beautiful, popular. They might become manipulative easily. These are creative and artistic people who can dress amazing and have amazing looking houses. This combination guarantees success and admiration. People can be easily jealous of these people. They can age gracefully. These are very generous and romantic lovers but they don’t bullshit, you can’t bring bare minimum to them or expect to get cursed out.

Aquarius Sun + Taurus Rising

The Taurus energy dominates. These are the ultimate chill people. They might be quirky but that can be in their habits, interests, and relationships. They probably have a very beautiful look to them and dress neat. These people can slowly build wealth for themselves in their lives. They can do well building their way up in a company. They offer great insight and can be ahead of their time with their thinking. Solution oriented they won’t mellow on problems for long. Sometimes these people get super physical and pleasing their senses and other times they’re stuck in their head. It can be hard to connect to them but they’re an asset wherever they go.

Gemini Sun + Virgo Rising

The Gemini energy dominates. The person who talks a lot but you always find you learn something new. They may carefully craft their ground of friends. They can be picky about a lot but they never stay in the same situation for long. They’ll be quick to complain but they are entertaining. They have the best jokes. They can be loud and move around a lot. Nothing escapes these people’s eyes. They can communicate very well. These people have high expectations and will read you like a book.

🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿

[raspbeyes]

ace good character question mark (not really morally but yes)

(another one of my longer ones, this one more self-indulgent than actually analytical sorryyy i might just be spouting off stuff already said)

okay out of the gate i love ace as a character and i had to just spit out words into the void of why such an asshole of a character just rose to the top of my list of fav drdt characters

now drdt definetely has a lot of assholes in its cast: arturo, arei, j, charles, and recently teruko herself as of chapter 2. now while i do love the latter three, i cant help but say i dont really love arturo and arei as much and find their asshole tendancies more aggrivating

SO WHY ACE? what did he do? out of anyone, he's the one who's become actually more of an asshole compared to ch 2. at least teruko has ch 1 and a reason for being a jerk, j has her redeemable moments and isnt inherently bad, just coarse, charles was redeemed as was arei, and arturo hasn't done anything that made him inherently worse from ch 1 (i can hear u say "what about the whole j thing?" and my point still stands ... he's still just as insufferable lol). meanwhile, ace has turned from a comedic relief who swears profusely to an actual bully, who while still is probably just bite, actually threatens nico's life several times during ch 2.

i think its the sparse moments of "calm" between his hectic swearing that makes him so much more compelling to me. when a character, especially a character as far gone and stubborn as ace shows these slight moments of awareness of themselves, i think it reveals so much to their character beneath surface level without overtly doing a full reveal, making them sm more interesting to me. what makes ace compelling is where the expectations of his supposedly hot headed demeanor dont add up

rambling time ~

ace has a strange relationship with his talent. for someone who is a red headed, athletic, and foul mouthed character is already signing the alarm bells of a leon kuwata character. those three major traits signal to some sort of pride ace would have for his talent. and while in some ways he is like leon in that he doesn't train much, its actually ace's fear of failure that keeps him pushing past his fear of horses. ace has a habit of supplementing one fear for another, like how he overcame his fear of levi with his fear of the killing game. but at the end of the day, ace lives not by any level of cockiness like his brash character design may suggest, but rather by constant fear.

though ace is aware of his cowardice, as seen in his dialogue in ch1, ep2

Ace: Damn ... I know I'm scared of everything, alright? You don't gotta point that out to me. I wanna overcome my fears, but it's really fuckin' hard!

Right away, when called out, ace admits to knowing of his flaw and even more, he wants to improve! it's wild that a character who seems so bull-headed would even comprehend the thought of self-improvment, especially coming from ace. ace doesn't just have the desire to be safe, but he also has the desire to grow past that mindset (though clearly not enough to actually change). moreover, his line of saying how teruko doesn't have to "point that out" will show up again later

i dont have much to say on the trial outside of the obvious ace being a dick and going along with popular concensus. tho his outburst on levi is interesting. especially where he calls levi a coward

Ace: That's right. Shut your damn mouth, you coward -

I wonder how ace now is the one calling levi a coward when ace previously was terrified of levi. he seems especially peeved off by levi's peacemaker attitude the most. honestly, this is some good ol' fashion projection. Ace is well aware he's a coward, but he calls out levi for somehow the same thing.

personally, i think ace is pissed off that someone as intimidating as levi manages to maintain his anger and fears when ace cannot. We know Levi has a darker past that we aren't aware of and with the slight collpase in his character after ace's sharp remarks, it's clear levi isn't as much of a pushover as he lets on. ace noticed this from the start due to his own paranoia - which is why ace feared levi intially sm - and seeing levi somehow being the better person infuriates him. he wishes to be better, but when he fails, seeing levi further rubs salt into that wound.

a clear but inevitable change occurs within ace from chapter 1 to 2, with the creator (i believe i cant find the screenshot sorryyy) mentioning that ace hasn't been dying his hair red like he usually does to hide away his grey hairs, probably due to the stress. out of anyone's reactions following min's exection, ace's is the most vocal

Ace: Get me the fuck out of here! I don't want to be here anymore! Someone, anyone out there, please help me!!

Because everything, from the body discovery, to the trial, to the execution, were all something ace feared would happen and kept wanting to deny by having outbursts and trying to gain some short-term joy in picking fights. but now, every one last of his fears have been proven true, justifying all of his negative emotions. next we see him in chapter 2 is believing the food eden and levi prepared is poisoned and jumping to the conclusion teruko died when she arrived early.

during the motive reveal, ace says off-handedly

Ace: You've been nothing but a complainer this whole time, Teruko, and that's coming from me.

Again, small detail, but shows ace's awareness that he often complains. just adds to how ace views himself.

Tho more concerningly ace says later

Ace: You know what, fuck it! Fuck this motive, fuck investigating, fuck this killing game, I'm just going to walk around randomly and get my head blown off by whatever's waiting for us. Who cares! Buh-bye!

I will touch on this more later, but here we get the first glimpse of ace's self-destructivness. perhaps in some desperate way to escape his fear of death and everything from the last chapter, ace chooses apathy as the solution to facing death

during teruko's exploration at the gym, ace constantly brings up levi's threat from the trial. but unlike before, where he might cower away, ace shows no fear in snatching levi's stretch band and running away. it seems that while before ace may have wanted to improve by following levi, seeing levi do something ace would have done while facing no reprucussions from the rest of cast drives ace mad. after all, levi did threaten to actually harm ace, while ace only makes cowardly attempts to fight, but somehow people are way more willing to look past levi compared to ace.

however, after teruko calls ace "utterly useless" and "volatile, a coward" and "will die quickly" ace comes rushing back into the gym

however, when confronted and teruko only doubles down on her statement, ace is taken aback before saying

Ace: Tch, I should have realized it from the start. In this killing game, everyone is out to get me. Especially people who love picking fights with me, people like you and Levi (side note: in all of my talk of his self awareness, ace still doesn't realize he's the one starting fights smhh). I can't believe I wasted my time with all that dumb shit like arm wrestling and running around screaming at meaningless stuff. I was fucking stupid to not take this killing game seriously from the start. I'm done with being everyone's kickable scaredy cat. The only thing I should do is look out for myself and myself alone.

His previous awareness of his cowardly-ness now has transformed to self-loathing, as he is angry at himself for not "taking the killing game seriously". it sure seems like he did, judging by his fear of it; but it seems to me he more means trying to let himself get caught up in miniscule conflicts to distract from bigger problems. in some ways, it's like teruko in which ace tried to open up (not a lot, mind you) to distract from the looming fear of dying. but now that it has been confirmed, he feels like he has been played for a fool. his awareness of his "scaredy cat" label further intrigues the audience, because it seems ace truly does loathe how much of a coward he is, but is unable to truly overcome it. before, he seemed more willing to openly express it, and his desire to change, exposing himself slightly. but now he realized how much of a weakness that was for him, as pointed out by teruko, so now ace is determined more than ever to mask his fear with more destructive tendancies.

next we see ace is with what becomes the start with his rivalry with nico. we do get a hint in chapter 1 of ace picking on nico, but here, it fully explodes to actually bullying.

when asked what set ace off, nico recounts how he mentioned that if ace keeps on yelling, people will "keep thinking you're dumb". now idk when this happened, but likely right after teruko said pretty much veratim what nico is warning ace about happening. with it already proven true, ace is already prepared to fire back and now direct all his resentment towards his classmates of their perception of him on nico.

Ace: You all think I'm damaged in the head. But more than that ... Levi, Teruko, Nico, Veronika, and everyone else. You all think you can say whatever the fuck you want to my face, right? I'm stupid, irritating, a good-for-nothing, and a spineless coward. Is that what everyone really thinks of me? And it's fine that you drill it into my head over and over again, because you think that I'll forget about it in 5 minutes like you do? Ha! Ha ha ha ha! You're sooo funny! So fucking funny, did anyone ever tell you that? You think I act like this for fun, and then I go to bed and sleep soundly at night, you dumb piece of shit?

THIS! THIS IS WHAT MAKES ACE SO COMPELLING! Because as much as it seems like Ace is rejecting what everyone is saying from the list he made of negative traits, I'd argue only Teruko hands-down affirmed what Ace says about himself. Levi apologized multiple times, Nico further explained he meant it as constructive critcism, and well ... idk Veronika is just thrilled so she doesn't care. Honestly, while it might be true the cast thinks that of him, only 4 people have mentioned it, and two already apologized. But that was enough for ace, because form this dialogue alone, it inadvertenly reveals this is how ace views himself constantly

that's why i love ace's character writing. he can outwardly seem like such a jerk (and he is, no denying that) from being a coward, but with his dialogue, it reveals so much about it without him ever uncharacteristically acting vulnerable. he fully weaponizes his own self-hatred and chooses to instead reframe it as everyone else's full hatred of him. he is constantly hating himself, but at the same time, it conflicts with his want to be seen by others better. due to his own self hatred however, he believes that everyone already looks down on him, which creates its own self-fufilling prophecy

(SPOILER FOR THE RECENT EP 9) this even connects with his relationship with food. while jockies do develop eds due to the strict weight limiations to correctly ride the horse, that quickly can spiral to body image issues, and thus how people view them. ace's ed likely further adds to his hatred to not just himself but his own body, an ed that is further justified by said talent. moreover, we know previously how it is his fear of being viewed a failure that pushes him to become a jockey.

but instead of being able to better himself, he chooses to project and cover these self-loathing thoughts as not just his own, but everyone else's. and with nico - someone ace despises due to nico being the coward ace likely fears he is seen as (get it ... scaredy cat ... cuz ... cuz nico looks like a cat ... hehehe ill see myself out) - to point it out to him right after being told off by teruko is what broke the camel's back for him.

moreover, with how ace questions the others about him choosing to act the way he does "for fun" hints to the actual lack of control ace feels he has not just on the world, but himself. he cannot find anything in himself to like, but because he doesn't know how to be better, he's left constantly internalizing it. it may be why he constantly causing a stir and lashing out, in order to never be left alone to think about it like he would at night

it may be why ace threatens to "bash" veronica's "brain out", so veronika, in all her psycho analysis, only points out the surface level fear of the killing game pushing ace to act the way he does, treating ace like a coward. and he is, but ace knows that more than anyone else about himself and the constant treatment of him as pathetic infuriates him because in his eyes, they all aren't pin pointing anything ace doesn't know about himself that he may be able to control.

(tho before i continue on, just know whatever i've been rambling on about is not a justification of any of ace's actions, especially him being a massive asshole to nico, only due to his own insecurity and not because of nico himself. while ace didn't deserve to be attempted-murder-ed for it, he is the one who took the first shot and people have the right to be upset, especially nico. pls dont take this post as me justifiying ace's actions or his words at all T^T he's an intersting characters and i just like watching characters cause interesting conflicts)

During the cafeteria scene, when david intervenes in ace exposing nico's secret, ace says

Ace: Tch. Of course. You always need people like David to save you from mean bullies like me, huh? What a pathetic weakling. The truth is, you're nothing but a spineless whelp who can't stand up for yourself.

Nico: Why are you so cruel?

Ace: Go ahead and cry. Let everyone swoop in and help you.

Nico: You're ... You're the worst.

Ace: Yeah? And?

Ace refers to himself as a "mean bully" and accepts the label as "the worst" from nico fully, showing how he plans on only "looking out for himself". Ace is aware what he is doing is wrong, which is interesting from the bully archetype.

And as others have mentioned before, his line of calling nico a "pathetic weakling" feels less just directed at nico, but more himself. Ace, in his perspective, finds it unfair that Nico has aroused others' pity while ace only manages to drive them away (here's a thought: don't start a fight first chance u get lol). he believes that nico and him are both equals in terms of "patheticness" but nico, in ch 1, is sought after by xander and teruko (something ace interjects into). In some vain way to gain an edge over what ace views as his worst qualities, ace antagonizes nico, but it only leads to more people supporting nico (obviously lol). we'll see often ace referring to nico as a coward, 100% projecting.

but after david, hu, and nico run out the cafeteria, i think ace's interaction with rose is particularly interesting and definitely worth looking into.

Rose: Ace, you definitely went too far.

Ace: Haah? You wanna go --

Rose: You're doing it again. How do you have so much energy to fight all the time?

Ace: Tch - Look, I just ... I struggle to control myself sometimes when I get angry. Or something.

Levi: Still, that in no way warrants what you said to Nico -

Ace: Oh, like you're one to talk. Why am I sticking around this dump? I'm leaving.

I have to wonder what Rose said that caught Ace off-guard. this is speculation, but initially ace seemed fired up to fight. But when Rose instead poses a question rather than a statement of ace's character, it's what manages to cool him down enough to admit his own anger issues. In a way, Rose may have been a lingering question Ace often thinks himself, and for Rose to verbalize it manages to cool Ace down. But when Levi makes a statement about ace, that and what ace views as levi's hypocrisy is enough to put ace back on the offensive (or defensive... idk he's just angry all over again)

now onto nico's attempted murder (also have to say this, but omg i love ace's va, Seth Raffield. especially during ch 6. bro put his everything to sound actually in pain its incredible work all throughout!)

while most of ace's reaction is in line of what you'll expect ace - hell anyone really if they were nearly murdered - to say (ie swear profusely and scream).

however, for once, ace is offered help from levi and eden (idk about teruko lol but ig she gives advice in telling ace to give up on finding nico.

Ace: Don't bother. I'd rather bleed all over my room than accept any sort of help from you.

Levi: Don't say that. Your injury is serious. If you don't get medical treatment right now, you're going to make your situation worse -

Ace: Then I'll let it get worse! I'd rather die alone than accept your help! It's inevitable anyway, so why should I take your pity on top of everything else I have to suffer through?! Don't talk to me ever again!

Levi: ...

Eden: Don't say that ...

Ace: You know ... Heh. I've always wondered which is worse, dying young or living a long shitty life of suffering. But it turns out neither of those options are as bad as this.

Teruko: What's 'this'?

Ace: Don't ask stupid crap. And also? Go eat shit. [Ace proceeds to pass out]

This always confuses me. LIKE WHAT IS 'THIS' REFERRING TO? The killing game? Being murdered? Nico getting away with murder??? WHAT AHHH?

It's so puzzling I cannot for the life of me figure out what ace is alluding to by what is so bad from dying at nico's hand. Whatever it is is clearly important since teruko points out ace's vague phrasing BUT I CAN'T FIGURE IT OUT!! ( T^T )

Though from what i do know, ace clearly still holds a deep resentment for levi, rather wanting to die than get his help. And that's a huge jump from ace of ch1 who was terrified of death, and perhaps he still is. but we did see early in ch2 after the motive reveal this self-destructive attitude he has adopted since the min's execution.

He fully accepts his death, calling it inevitable, which may be even more true for ace's case with the understanding of his ed. with his body "falling apart" and eds being known to get in the way of a body being able to properly recover, ace's paranoia of death becomes something not just delusion but a constant reality for him. Death is always present in his mind, with it seeming he has spent a long time questioning whether dying young or old is better or worse.

I don't have much to say as of newer material since it's pretty expected of ace's reaction. tho its really jarring how people are fully unwilling to accept the possibility nico attempted to kill ace WHEN HE WAS CLEARLY INJURED. it's wild. i can't say i agree with him fully going after nico during the investigation, but i cant say i think ace is in the wrong since LITERALLY NOBODY IS WILLING TO BELIEVE ACE, not even eden nor teruko choose to back him up on what they saw.

so uh tl;dr (don't blame u)

soo ...yeah ace cool character maybe? idk if anything i really said was anything ground breaking i just had to compile them all together in this big ol' post. ace is a character who idk resonates with me in all of his frustration. a lot of what he says feels like a very human feeling of knowing his wrongs but feeling powerless to make a change, creating a cycle of bitter frustration. it's what really makes ace stand out, as while at first he appears to be a one off hot headed joke, ch 2 takes the breadcrumbs laid out in ch 1 and truly expands on the implications it means. He's the bully trope, but instead of bullying out of confidence, he bullies from insecurity. And not just that, he is very aware of it and hates himself for how he acts. A bully who wants to do better but can't control himself is just intriguing and i cant wait to see more ace development

now anyway ill be off in my sacrifice circle to manifest survivor ace

[villain-sympathizer]

Hi! Can you possibly do something for Redestro & skeptic with a shy SO?

Fluff/smut. Go wild. 🥹

HELL YES i can anon 💕💕💕

i'll stick to fluff for now since i have more content ideas for that!

────── ･ ｡ﾟ: *.☽ .* : ｡ﾟ･ ──────

[Contents: Mentions of social anxiety; Skeptic being a meanie butt at first but he becomes a softie]

»»—— ReDestro + Skeptic with a shy S/O ——««

He's so patient, despite what people would think considering his Quirk. He can never hide his irritation because his stress markings would give him away, regardless if he's still smiling and light hearted.

However, with his S/O, you'll never see his markings grow, even if they're purposefully trying to make him mad. Why? Because he loves them! I absolutely see one of his main love languages being acts of service, so no matter the task, it never bothers him.

If their shyness gets in the way of doing tasks, such as making a phone call or approaching someone for directions, he'll do it without hesitation. Eventually he'll start to do these things automatically, as if it were instinct.

If his S/O ever thinks of themself as a burden for needing so much help on basic social interactions, he'll remind them that he's absolutely more than willing and happy to do these things. Why? Because it's for them. The entire dynamic between them is basically just that quote from Euripedes by Anne Carson:

"Pylades: I'll take care of you. Orestes: It's rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it's you."

You bet your ass if anyone makes fun of his S/O's shyness, or does that bullshit 'Speak up, quit being shy/quiet', Rikiya is shutting them tf down in the most passive-aggressive business-like style. ESPECIALLY if it's a business partner, because I know damn well Rikiya is the kind of guy to bring his S/O everywhere. Hell, if it was rude enough, he would just drop ties with that person right then and there, all with a sweet little smile on his face.

Is willing to work with them to help improve their shyness! If they want, that is. Coming from my experience with social anxiety, it's insanely fuckin' tough to work through that, but it always helps to have people I'm comfortable with to be there with me incase I mess up. And that's exactly the role Rikiya will happily play if they want.

Absolutely will give quiet claps and praise whenever they accomplish something on their own. He's their personal cheerleader and will never stop being a personal cheerleader.

────── ･ ｡ﾟ: *.☽ .* : ｡ﾟ･ ──────

Okay, it's obvious that Tomoyasu is totally the type of person to get fed up with people who are shy. The pauses, the stuttering, the rambling, the mumbling - they're all likely his biggest pet peeves.

However, that viewpoint changes the moment he finds himself attached to someone.

When he first met his S/O, he likely acted like how most assholes would with someone who was shy: "What? Speak up and cease your mumbling, you measly worm, I haven't got all day." Or "For the love of Destro, will you just get to the point already? And quit your stuttering, it's embarrassing."

But all that starts to change, slowly but surely, when he comes to like that person. Now it's: "Sorry, what was that? I was distracted." (He was not, but it likely makes them feel less guilty), "Louder please, [Name]." and "I'm not going to bite, [Name]. Now just tell me what it is you need to say."

It was shocking to the rest of the PLF, to say the least, to see Tomo grow kinder to someone. That was the obvious sign that he had some sort of feelings for them, because Tomo never changes, especially not for someone else.

One he and his S/O are together, it's an absolutely drastic change. While his words went from downright mean, to a little rude but considerate, now suddenly morphed to being completely soft and understanding towards them. It gave his subordinates whiplash from how his demeanor would instantly change the moment his S/O was involved.

"If I see even ONE more mistake from any of you brain-dead troglodytes, I'll be sure this weeks paycheck runs you into the fucking GROUND- Oh, hello dear, I'm glad to see you." Followed by a kiss to their head, and absolutely floored looks from his workers.

And like ReDestro, he'll go off on anyone who makes fun of his S/O's shyness, going absolutely feral with rage sometimes.

There was a time where Dabi was poking fun at them, saying how they'd be more enjoyable to be around if they were bolder and less quiet, and clearly making them uncomfortable and upset.

Oh, Tomo had an absolute fit when he walked in to that. He needed to be physically restrained by ReDestro's quirk, yelling and spitting like a rabid cat at the burnt man, who honestly seemed pretty unnerved at the raw power Tomo can channel when he wants to. It wasn't until his S/O stood between them that he even begun to calm down.

After that, no one attempted to make even a lighthearted joke about them, not even when neither of them were in the room. Tomo has cameras and mics everywhere, after all.

[mirrorpriest]

Yandere Kaeya/Male!Reader (genitals unspecified)

tw: noncon, dark content

You’re beautiful. Rippling muscle and rough hands, worn armor fitting over your carefully trained body like a glove. Kaeya wants nothing more than to devour you. Hold you in his hands, against his tongue, between his teeth, until his are the only marks left on your body.

It’s so strange: this carnal temptation. He’s used to turning it against others, using desire to pry people open, steal away their deepest secrets with gentle touches and smoldering eyes. You came into Mondstadt, back ramrod straight and shoulders squared, unbothered by the curious stares and suspicion thrown your way. You’re here to collect a bounty, he learned, on the hunt for a murder suspect from Fontaine.

You’re a bounty hunter. Willing to do anything as long as it pays well enough, making money from people desperately seeking justice. ‘It’s just work,’ You had told Jean, when she finally tore herself away from the Grand Master’s desk to investigate what everyone had been whispering about. She deemed you not a threat, for now. Kaeya knew that was his sign to keep you in his sight.

Not that he needed prompting to watch you. He found himself drawn to you, eye watching how your hands grip the hilt of your sword. His body heating at the idea of your body moving in tandem with his own, two unyielding forces rocking into each other. Your strong hands on his body, on his cock, around his hips. Wherever you would deign to touch him. But you never so much as paid him any mind.

No matter how friendly a face he wore, you waved Kaeya away like he were a pest. Unbothered by curious stares and suspicion thrown your way, unbothered by some strange man’s desperation for you. It made a pit of frustration, resentment, settle deep in Kaeya’s stomach. Just as you rolled into Mondstadt, a fresh breeze from another land, you’re ready to leave. Target nullified, you inform him. The information chills him to the bone, only because he knows you will depart soon.

He can’t watch you just walk away. Not when the tremble of desire still rumbles across his skin.

It’s a hasty plan, not his best work, but you accept his offer for a celebratory drink. Kaeya had expected you to say no, but his persistence has apparently worn your steely demeanor down until you’re willing to give him a precious hour of your time. An hour is all he needs.

Ever the fixture in Angel’s Share, no one notices or suspects Kaeya. Tavern goers’ eyes glide right over him; unseeing, uncomprehending. Charles hardly turns an eye his way when he orders a drink in advance for your arrival; doesn’t pay any mind to the small burlap sack Kaeya fiddles with. Whatever the Cavalry Captain does in his free time doesn’t occupy the minds of Mondstadters, content to see but a shallow image of him. For once, Kaeya is content to be on the outside looking in. Only visiting, never fully assimilated.

Mondstadt’s wine washes bitter down the back of your tongue, not improving your impression of the country. It’s renowned for being expensive with a taste unique to the region, but you’re hardly a drinker. Perhaps it’s your general distaste for alcohol that makes it so unpleasant, yet you swallow it down all the same. The Cavalry Captain, tawny and lean and insistent, talks at you in a way you almost attribute to nervousness, if it weren’t for his general demeanor: leaning back in his posture, confident in his manner. You had expected him to have grown tired of this behavior by now. Five days of relentless tailing. He’s hawkish, you think as you drain the last of your wine. The crushed remnants of something in the bottom of your glass catch your eye, a sick roiling in your stomach. He’s hawkish.

////

He’s upon you, hands around your collar and fingers digging into your skin. The soft slide of satin against your back, a fabric rustling both muted and too loud. You don’t remember how you got here, underneath that persistent knight, but he’s bearing down on you mercilessly. No words enter your mind, only a feeling of wrongness and revulsion. The sound of his skin upon your own draws a groan from the pinched flesh of your throat, struggling past his encompassing grip. It’s dark, your vision failing you, but his face is fully bare to you. The sight of his intense eyes, unfamiliar and cold, focused only on you makes something acrid lap at the back of your throat.

[jj-the-writer]

Chapter 6.

Another day.

Shelingia's routine continued on forward like normal for a few weeks, eventually she got good enough to earn herself some sleep without her parents' intervention. Either that or they simply got bored of her. The relationship between Shelingia and her trainer blossomed beautifully, to the point where Shelingia would crack a smile in his presence quite often. Things were getting a little better for her daily routine.

The morning arrives marking the start of a new day of training. She unenthusiastically gets out of her bed to go eat her breakfast, which consisted of the usual vending machine treats she gets given by the staff members like usual. Quickly enough she noticed a subtle pain on her upper arm, but she dismissed it as a mosquito bite and moved on with her day. While waiting for Daryun's arrival she practiced with her dummy. She noticed that she felt more energetic when she used her powers today, she got pumped up and ready to spar with Daryun, adrenaline rushing through her.

Once Daryun arrived they greeted each other and gave each other a high five like usual. Shelingia quickly got in a fighting stance and after Daryun was prepared, they began their sparring session. Daryun had known that with trial and error Shelingia got a bit better at fighting bit by bit, but he noticed that from the previous day's spar, she'd gotten a lot better, more than her usual improvement. She was quicker, stronger, and with impeccable reactions to his movements. Daryun was itching to congratulate her on their break but he had to focus on his fight since he started having a difficult time avoiding her attacks, so he started putting a little more effort.

Shelingia missed an attack she thought she had in the bag and she shouts "AH SHIT MAN! I was this close." She started getting visibly frustrated the more attacks she missed, something she's never done before if one were to judge by her cold demeanor and stoic expressions. The more frustrated she became the more dangerous her attacks became. Daryun started worrying that something might've happened to her, he wanted to address it but he was too busy fighting with her.

When the break came, Daryun tried to initiate a conversation with her.

"Hey, good job out there today! You're improving very quickly, and today you're much better than last time, I've never seen anything like it before!"

Shelingia nods without making eye contact before letting out a "Thanks." Making Daryun feel like the effort he put in to make a bond with her didn't matter.

As the situation had now become awkward due to Shelingia's unwillingness to chat, there's a long pause before Daryun decides to try again.

"You know I also noticed you got more irritable when missing a few of your hits, that's very unlike you, has something happened?"

"What are you talking about? I don't feel irritated at all, and besides..." She paused before looking at the floor and continuing. "I'm not supposed to miss."

After that, before Daryun could respond, she got up and exclaimed "We've been on a break for long enough, get up I wanna fight." A smile creeping up on her face.

Daryun was confused as he didn't remember her being this excited to spar before, he thought something might've happened to her, but he figured that asking her about it directly wouldn't amount to anything.

Despite Daryun's second thoughts, they got back to fighting and he was faced with the same things as previously. Shelingia was now irritable, energetic, and hit harder the more upset she was. As time went by Shelingia's offensive output had gotten so overwhelming to the point Daryun knew for a fact that something was amiss. While trying his best to avoid Shelingia's relentless attacks Daryun ended up making a T sign with his hands, asking for a time-out, with the intention of talking to Shelingia about what's going on.

The girl, however, didn't stop, she kept attacking as if she couldn't understand the meaning he was trying to convey. Amidst their fighting Daryun elects to try and talk to her while also avoiding her attacks. "Shelingia! Calm down, what's going on?!"

Shelingia continues throwing hits on Daryun as she responds: "Nothing's going on! And I am calm! Keep your head in the fight!"

Her voice was loud and broken up by gasp sand grunts due to being in the middle of fighting.

From her tone, Daryun could understand that Shelingia was immensely irritated and angry, which was probably the reason she was acting out that way.

Daryun sighed, and made a decision to immobilize her so he could talk to her properly. So, once Shelingia closed in on him he found the opportunity to swiftly move out of the way and get behind her while keeping her hands restrained behind her back.

Shelingia started moving violently, trying desperately to break free.

"LET GO! We need to keep GOING!" She screamed and fought tooth and nail to escape his grasp. And as Shelingia was struggling to escape, Daryun thought to have seen fire bursting out of her mouth.

"No! We will talk. And until you promise me to calm down, I will not let your arms go." Daryun barked, with tears slowly forming in his eyes.

Shelingia couldn't listen, it's as if she was in a trance, she kept fighting to get out of his grip while shouting.

After a minute of struggling she suddenly stops moving, she takes a deep breath and shouts: "I said, LET GO!"

With that shout, her body temperature increased dramatically, far beyond what's possible for normal humans, her skin got so hot in fact, that Daryun couldn't hold on to her any longer, he let go from the pain of the burn in his palms and jumped back away from Shelingia.

Suddenly, everything went black for Shelingia, she tossed and turned on the bed that she was laying at and eventually she jolted awake. For a moment, she felt relieved that what little she remembered from the earlier events had only been a nightmare, but quickly she realized that the room she was in was not her room, but one of the infirmary rooms. The nurse looked a bit scared from Shelingia's sudden awakening, their efforts to hide their fear didn't get them a long way. Despite their feelings, the nurse begins to talk.

"Ahem. Goodmorning Shelingia."

"Good... Morning? Why am I here...?" She questioned as she held her head from the headache, the bright room and white walls irritating her eyes. The nurse walked closer to her and spoke. "All in due time, do you remember your name?"

As uneasy as she was, Shelingia sat up in the bed and started answering the questions.

"Shelingia." She paused. "Shelingia Graham..." Her facial expression bacame bitter as she said her final word.

"Good. And how old are you?"

"I am 16 years of age."

"Great, occupation?"

"None, I live with my parents in the establishment that we are currently in. If I may, why am I being questioned?"

"You haven't had your senses for about 24 hours, the questions are to make sure your brain activity is normal. Your parents requested I run all possible check-up tests on you as well as take a blood sample after what transpired in your training room."

"What... Transpired in my training room...?" She inquired curiously.

The nurse looked at her surprised. As they struggled to answer her question, Shelingia's thoughts became darker yet darker by the second.

Her thoughts quickly became clouded. "What if my nightmare was real? What if I really did go crazy? But then, what happened after that?" Her eyes became goggled in fear of what might have happened.

"You... Don't remember? I'm gonna have to write that down, it's a pity, your parents have been expecting your awakening so you could tell them what happened in there..."

As Shelingia listened to the statement from the nurse her entire body shuddered, as if she didn't have enough to think about.

"What... Did happen in there...?" She opened her eyes wide as if she remembered something and asked: "Where's Daryun? Is he okay?"

"What's the last thing you remember?"

"I remember... Sparring with him in my training room, I was doing really well, if I remember something clear is that I felt more powerful than usual... I feel like I had gotten really angry, however I have no idea why... And I think Daryun tried to restrain me... But I remember nothing else after that..."

"Can you remember anything else? Anything at all?"

"I remember... Daryun... Looking at me with a shocked expression... He was... Scared...?" Her train of thought was interrupted by a sharp headache. "Ow! Shit..."

"Alright you can stop now, lay down, you're showing signs of minor memory loss, I need to begin my tests on you now, is that okay?"

"You... May begin." She declared with a heavy heart.

After running all possible tests on her, the nurse concluded that Shelingia had nothing wrong with her other than fatigue and the headache, they only had to get the blood sample now.

"Alright miss Shelingia, all I need to do now is take a blood sample from you, and after that I'll call your parents in here, they've been uneasy ever since you fainted."

Shelingia held her cheek with her hand, reminiscing of what it means when her parents are 'uneasy'.

"Carry on." She instructed with a straight face that showed no emotion.

Shelingia remained emotionless through the whole procedure. In a way, she prepared herself to face her parents.

[shatar-aethelwynn]

What "obsession", my dear? You have attacked "The Greek" (!) with absolutely no reason in a comment under a post of one of your friends having as subject something totally irrelevant (the Egyptian faience frog). Who exactly is the obsessed? Anyway, your reply to my last message was very weak and totally beside the point, as you have objected essentially nothing to what I had written. Not that my expectations were much higher, of course. To remind you only one aspect, your friends are in no way specialists in Late Period Egypt (to put it mildly). Moreover, to assess what the classical sources say and their value on any subject, one must have a knowledge and understanding of the context and content of these sources, things that your friends totally lack. So, I repeat my question, on the basis of what expertise exactly do your friends reject totally the classical sources on Late Period Egypt, but also refuse more generally any value to the work of major classical authors? If you search a bit, you will find quite easily that Egyptologists who specialize in the Egypt of Late Period have a much more open-minded approach on this subject and exploit what the classical sources say on Egypt, in combination of course with the Egyptian sources. You will not find many specialists in Late Period Egypt howling in chorus "Herodotus is my b...ch" or "F...k Herodotus", as your friends do on this site, moreover fanaticizing on this topic their ignorant fanbase. However, it seems that you profess that all intellectual authorities may be criticized and even vandalized, except the Supreme and All-Encompassing Egyptological and Historical Authority of your tumblr friends, which is for you absolutely immune to criticism and totally beyond question. And of course you completely failed to grasp my point that not only the ancient Egyptian, but also the cultural heritage and the classics of other peoples deserve respect and should not be vandalized. You don't have either any grasp (again to put it mildly) on the place and importance of the work of the great ancient Greek classics in the cultural heritage of the whole humanity. But I will not continue this interaction with you. I will only suggest that, just for a change, you consider the possibility of stopping being the blind admirer and the maid of your tumblr "academic" friends and of trying to develop some kind of independent personality. Bye and best wishes for your future.

Ah, so it is you. Tell me, have you created another account and are messaging me on anon so no one else can attempt to do to you what you've done to my friends for two. fucking. years. Or have you finally decided I'm worthy of the same lack of respect you have shown to my friends by logging out to message me because I've blocked you?

I have refuted you repeatedly in the past without once changing the point I was making and you proved incapable of reading comprehension then, so why should I bother now? You're just going to ignore anything I say, continue to slander my friends to fuel your self-righteous arrogance, insist that I have wronged you personally without showing any proof that I have done so, and display nothing close to the calm rational discourse you claim to expect from us.

But, once again, because I doubt you remember: I do occasionally use Herodotus in my research, which I have never denied and have stated before. Since I don't study the history of historiography, I don't generally find him to be particularly enlightening. I don't think he's anything important for studying Egypt. He's fine for the Greeks if you ignore the mythological stuff and the heresay, but when there is a conflict between the accounts of the Egyptians and what Herodotus says, Herodotus is wrong. Herodotus is not a trustworthy source for ancient Egypt. He has served his purpose historically and can now bow out of 90% of the Egyptological discourse as either demonstrably wrong or irrelevant. You equate "Herodotus said this sentence", which does appear in many books on Egypt at a lay-reader level because he's a relatively familiar name, with "yeah, you can go trust whatever he says" and no Egyptologist will ever agree with you on that. Especially since those references to Herodotus are rarely more than throwaway lines that could easily be removed from most books without any consequences.

You also still fail to show an understanding of both what historical criticism is and how it actually works, as well as what kind of website you are on.

Oh and congrats on admitting you still hate-read their blogs even though they've blocked you too.

[babyboibucky]

The Match - Part 10

Pairing: CEO!Bucky x Fem!Reader

Summary: Sam helps you out in planning for the launch while Bucky is away.

Word Count: 4.2k (woopsies)

Warnings: SMUT is back, angry unprotected sex, spitting, a tiny hint at scratching and choking, some hurtful words thrown in yada yada yada, kinda intense asjkcackansk

A/N: STRAP THE FUCK IN BECAUSE WE BOUTTA RIDE A DAMN ROLLERCOASTER OMG I’m nervous for this because I found this part very intense while writing it. And I hope it comes across as that to y’all as well because my fingers ached from how hard I was typing this part lmfao. Team Bucky vs Team Reader/Team Sam here we goooo sksksk enjoy

The Match Masterlist || MAIN MASTERLIST

You didn't accept Sam's invitation to connect in LinkedIn. Not yet. But it did give you several ideas, like maybe submitting a resignation letter? Get away from Bucky and his toxic ass? He has Mackenzie now, he can easily have her take over your position anyway.

However, you were also torn because you loved your job at Bucky's company. It paved way for you to improve your skills and you experienced a lot of growth too. And well, Bucky's there too but god, you hated him right now. As much as you wanted to wave the white flag, you didn't feel like it was the right thing to do.

You wanted Bucky to learn that not everything he wants, he can easily get. And Mark was right, that you weren't just a trophy employee or whatever. You were so much more than what Bucky probably thinks of you.

And you were going to prove him that.

-

"Hey, Bev. Can you ring up your boss for me? Tell him I want to go over some of the plans I made for the launch before I discuss it with Mackenzie tomorrow." you asked.

Beverly was about to lift the phone up when an unexpected visitor arrived. None other than Sam Wilson himself.

"I didn't mean to eavesdrop but did I hear you correctly? You've already made some plans for the launch?" he asked with interest.

You chuckled, "Sort of. Well, it's a rough draft of my ideas. I just thought it would be nice to get a headstart." you admitted.

Sam nodded and was about to say something when Bucky stepped out of his office, his brows furrowing upon seeing you and Sam conversing. Bucky eyed you before glancing over at Sam, patting his shoulder gently as a greeting.

"You checking up on us or what?" Bucky teased with a chuckle.

Sam shook his head, "Not really. Well, kinda. I figured that another presentation would be unnecessary, I mean. I'd love to work on the launch with your team instead of being on the sidelines for approvals." he admitted.

You shrugged, "I think that's a great idea too. Less time to waste, less back and forth." you pitched in.

Bucky frowned a bit, his jaw clenching at how you backed up Sam immediately. "That's fine, but I have a meeting in a few. Might last the entire day. Mackenzie won't be here until tomorrow too." he said.

"She and I can discuss her plans today and maybe I can pitch in some of my ideas too. She can present them tomorrow to you and Kenzie." Sam suggested, gesturing over to you.

Bucky stared at you and Sam alternately, his hands balling into fists at his sides. You could see his internal struggle about leaving you and Sam to discuss about the launch, without his presence.

You lifted up the folder in your hand, "I wanted to go over these plans with you but I didn't know you have a meeting. Sam and I can just refine these today, would save us a lot of time. We don't want to be rushing anything for this project at the last minute." you told him.

Bucky swallowed but nodded anyway, albeit with hesitation, "Yeah. Of course. I'll just catch up on the both of you later."

And with that, Bucky walked away but not without sparing you and Sam one final glance. His eyes met yours for a brief moment and you weren't sure, but you saw a flash of worry in his eyes before it was immediately replaced by his usual stern, ice-cold gaze.

You turned to Sam with a smile, "We can discuss in the conference room." you said and led the way.

-

The planning was seamless and you were surprised that you had so much fun exchanging ideas with Sam, to the point of almost forgetting about lunch break. It was quarter past noon when the both of you realized that it was way past lunch time.

"Do you want to grab lunch or order something instead? I honestly hate working lunch, just so you know." Sam said with a laugh.

You groaned, "I hate that too, honestly." you admitted with a chuckle.

Sam nodded, "Great, we can head out for a quick lunch?" he asked.

It didn't even cross your mind to hesitate, so you immediately agreed and even asked if you can take Beverly with you. You'd grown somewhat attached to her in the short time you've known her. Poor kid was being treated like an outcast by the other office girls. She always waited for you to have your lunch break too, especially that Mark has been pretty busy lately.

Sam was kind enough to agree about including Beverly for lunch. The two of you were about to head out of the conference room when Beverly peeked in, worry etched all over her face.

"I need your help." she whined, "I think I messed up Sir James' schedule. Mister Nakajima is on the phone and said that he's going to be an hour late for a meeting today. I forgot about Sir James’ meeting with another company today!" she explained, almost close to tears.

You rushed over to her and held her shoulders, "Hey, calm down. Did you tell Mister Nakajima?" you asked.

"I did and he got mad at me! Today is his only free day and he said that if he doesn't meet up with Sir James, the deal is off." Beverly said, stomping her foot on the ground.

You heaved out a sigh, knowing that the deal was very important. Mister Nakajima owned an auto manufacturing company which produces world-class materials for cars. Bucky had been working on convincing Mister Nakajima to be his permanent supplier for quite a while now. Big fucking deal.

You looked back at Sam, "Hey, I'm sorry. Can you give me a couple of minutes?" you asked with an apologetic expression.

"Take your time." Sam nodded with a smile.

You went over to Beverly's desk and took over the phone call, without knowing that Sam trailed behind you. He watched you carefully as you talked to Mister Nakajima, your demeanor calm yet confident.

"Hi, Mister Nakajima. I'm the company's Marketing Head and I would like to apologize for the mix up. Bucky has been working really hard on improving the quality of our products, he's been in meetings in and out. That being said, would it be alright if I take over this afternoon's meeting instead? Bucky worked on an amazing presentation and I honestly would love to go over it with you and just show you how this partnership would be beneficial for both our companies." you asked.

Fortunately, you were able to appease Mister Nakajima while also saving Beverly's ass for her honest mistake. As soon as the call was done, you reassured Beverly that everything was fine now and that you'll take care of Bucky. By the time you looked back at Sam, he was merely smiling at you.

"You're really good with people."

-

Lunch break passed by quickly, with you, Sam and Beverly engaging in all sorts of conversations. Even Beverly felt comfortable being around his presence. He mainly talked about his experiences at his first job, giving Beverly a couple of tips on how to navigate through the corporate world.

Sam was very kind.

The planning resumed after lunch and by the time Mister Nakajima and his associates arrived, the launch plan was pretty much refined with a lot of details. Sam excused himself to give you time to meet with Mister Nakajima, however, he said he'll be staying until Bucky comes back.

Presenting to Mister Nakajima made you nervous as fuck, especially that he didn't really work closely with you which might affect his decision. Luckily though, you knew Bucky's presentation like the back of your hand due to the fact that he had gone over it with you for a couple of times back when the two of you were still, well, fucking around.

Ah, the good old days.

The meeting with Mister Nakajima went perfectly well because as soon as you were done with the presentation, the old man simply asked for the contract to seal the deal. Although it wasn't you who actually worked on the deck, you had a sense of fulfillment. You were proud of yourself and you couldn't wait to dangle it right in front of Bucky's face.

"Thank you so much, Mister Nakajima. We are excited for this partnership." you said happily as you led him and his associates out of the conference room, just as when Bucky arrived.

He looked confused when Mister Nakajima greeted him happily, shaking his hand and telling him how good his presentation was. Bucky looked over at you, as if asking what the hell was going on. You merely shrugged and headed back inside the conference with Sam.

Bucky followed shortly and for some reason, he looked agitated. He was about to speak up when Sam beat him to it, giving him a hard pat on the back.

"The launch event is gonna be really good." he said confidently before glancing at you.

"You're lucky to have her, Bucky." he said before bidding goodbye, giving you one last look and a wink as well, something that Bucky immediately noticed.

When Sam left, so did the light atmosphere inside the conference room. Bucky turned to you with a scowl, his footsteps rushed and heavy as he approached you.

"What the hell happened with Mister Nakajima?" he asked gruffly.

You smiled as you handed him an envelope, "The partnership is a go. He signed the contract and his team will be keeping in contact with us and our factory soon." you explained proudly.

Bucky took the envelope from your hand and went through the contract before placing it back on the table. "I thought my meeting with him isn't until Friday."

"Beverly mixed up your schedule and before you even reprimand her, give the girl a break. It's her first job and with the amount of meetings you've been having, mix-ups are inevitable. What matters now is that I took over the presentation and Mister Nakajima signed the contract." you explained with nonchalance.

Bucky shook his head, "The end does not justify the means." he said. "Beverly should have been careful. My schedule is not a joke and if I miss another important meeting, that can fuck up the entire company."

You rolled your eyes, "Calm down, Beverly surely learned from today's mistake. It's done. The deal is on. Everything is peachy. The launch details have been planned out, Sam is happy with it. All I have to do is to secure your and Mackenzie's approval for it and then we can start with the execution. You're welcome." you said all in one breath, handing Bucky a USB containing the details of the launch.

You brushed past Bucky to leave the conference room but you were immediately pulled back with his hand around your arm. He looked down at you with an angry look on his face, almost fuming. You couldn't understand why the fuck he was so aggravated with you today. Sure, he had been testing your patience lately but it was the first time he actually looked like he was going to snap.

Not at the situation, but at you.

"Are you trying to impress Sam? Taking on my responsibilities while he's around?" he asked, eyes narrowing at you.

You scoffed, unable to believe what Bucky was accusing you of. Pulling your arm back, you took a step back and looked at him with disgust. "You're unbelievable, Bucky." you said.

"Had I not stepped in, we would have lost the deal. You promoted me for a reason, and I believe part of it is my leadership skills. And no, I'm not trying to impress Sam. I'm simply doing my fucking job." you hissed and tried to side step Bucky, only for him to block your way.

"Did he offer you a position in his company? What the fuck was the wink all about?" Bucky accused yet again.

"Oh my god, Bucky! You're blowing things out of proportion. He didn't. We talked about the event. That's it." you explained, pinching the bridge of your nose because Bucky was getting on your very last nerve.

Bucky had been fucking with you too much now and you could feel the last bits of your composure slowly slip away with every word that was coming out of his mouth. Coming for your job was one thing, but accusing you of flirting your way to another company? That was a low blow.

"Don't lie to me, I saw the notification on your phone the other day. Seems to me like Tinder matches don't work for you anymore, you moved on to LinkedIn now to find connections instead?" he asked and that particular statement struck a certain nerve.

You let out a bitter scoff, "Do you even hear yourself, Bucky? At least Sam was being professional and didn't use Tinder to hire a fucking consultant to threaten my damn job!" you slipped, unable to hold back.

The look on Bucky's face was a whirlwind of emotions-- shock, wrath, exhaustion-- and you felt like you were supposed to get scared. Gone were the blue orbs that used to make you feel safe, his eyes only held anger in them. And the thing was, your eyes looked the same as you held Bucky's gaze.

You were so fucking tired of everything, of Bucky.

"How did you-- it doesn't matter." Bucky said, shaking his head. "How much did Sam offer you?" he asked.

Your jaw dropped at the implication of Bucky's statement, "You are a fucking asshole, Bucky. Sam didn't offer me a fucking job. You really don't listen, Bucky. You never listen." you huffed out exasperatedly.

"Okay, maybe he hasn't laid down his offer yet. Perhaps, you let him fuck you too?"

Your vision blacked out upon hearing that and by the time you regained your senses, all you could feel was how your palm stung. You had walked up to Bucky and slapped him right across the face, hard enough to make the corner of his bottom lip bleed. Your entire body was trembling from rage as you stood in front of Bucky.

He tilted his head as he wiped the blood off from his lip, looking up at you with lust-filled eyes. And then his hand gripped your neck, tugging you close for a bruising kiss. You grunted against his mouth and pushed him away, slapping him again. Before Bucky could even recover, your fingers wrapped around his tie pulling him down to you for another kiss.

Walls crumbled down, tension was broken and needs were being fulfilled. The rush of emotions blurred the line between fury and lust with the latter obviously winning. All you could think about was the throb that you suddenly felt within your core begging for relief.

Relief that was denied from you for the past few weeks of playing cat and mouse with Bucky.

And with the way Bucky was kissing you, you knew he felt the same. It had been too long and both your minds were too hazy to even care that it was only five in the afternoon and that there were employees working just outside the conference room.

Was the fear of getting caught going to stop you? No, not now. Because you needed release and you were sure as hell going to get it. This wasn't like the other times you and Bucky fucked. You didn't care about Bucky at the moment, how he felt or what was going on in his mind. You just needed to release all your pent up emotions and you were going to use Bucky to get what you need.

Bucky pushed you against the table, your tailbone hitting the edge with such force that made you groan from pain.

"Yeah, why don't you make some noise so everyone can see how fucking needy you are for me?" Bucky growled, gripping your face with one hand, forcing you to keep your eyes on him as his other hand bunched your skirt up to your waist.

You let out a chuckle, "I'm not the one going to make noise here." you warned before reaching down to palm his erection.

Bucky hissed and bit his lip hard to prevent himself from eliciting a moan. His jaw ticked as he squeezed your face tighter, forcing you to open your mouth as his eyes scanned your features.

"Watch your fucking mouth, baby. I still own you, you're fucking mine." he said through gritted teeth, his eyes lidded as he looked down at you like a predator.

You kept your mouth closed but as soon as Bucky's fingers found your damp panties, you weren't able to stop your whimper. Bucky took the opportunity and spit in your mouth before crashing his lips against yours in a messy kiss. It was all tongue and spit, the way he kissed you as his fingers rubbed at your folds through the thin fabric of your underwear.

He kissed you like he owned you.

"I'm not yours, Bucky." you said as your hands quickly unbuckled his belt, unzipping his trousers and pulling out his hard cock from the confines of his boxers.

The groan that reverberated from Bucky's chest as you stroked him made you smirk. His hand on your face slid down to your neck, holding you tightly as he pushed aside your underwear and then he slid into you with no prior warning. The lack of foreplay made it hurt when he bottomed out, but the pain quickly turned into pleasure when Bucky started moving his hips against yours.

No words were further exchanged from then on. Only soft whimpers and hushed grunts could be heard. However, it was clear that even up until now, there was competition. You didn't want to make noise, didn't want to lose to Bucky. You didn't want to give him the pleasure of knowing how fucking good he was making you feel right now, with how each drag of his cock was making your toes curl inside your heels.

Your hands held onto his broad shoulders as he fucked you against the table, the fabric of his suit bunching up against your fingers. Bucky kept his gaze on you and not once did you falter, not even when the tip of his cock hit your cervix, almost punching the air out of your lungs.

Bucky held the back of your thighs and lifted you up, sitting you on the edge of the table and bending forward so he could angle his cock in a way that you would feel it deep within you. Your legs automatically wrapped around his waist, one of your hands scratching at his jaw as he continued to pound your sopping cunt.

"God, fucking missed this pussy. Can feel you clamping down on my cock, you gonna cum soon?" he asked, pressing the tip of his nose against yours.

You clamped a hand over your mouth, muffling the wanton moan that Bucky pounded out of you. Not wanting to be the only one to make noise, you clenched around him hard. Bucky let out a growl at how your walls squeezed his cock, his balls tightening as his own orgasm approached.

"Cum for me, Bucky." you whimpered, tipping your head up to lick at Bucky's mouth as your legs tightened around his waist to pull him deeper into you.

Bucky exhaled heavily through his nose, the veins on his neck popping out as he fucked your harder on the table. He kept his hand wrapped around your neck while the other held onto your waist so tight, you could feel his fingers digging deep into your skin. Even with your clothes on, you were sure that you'll be getting bruises from how hard his grip on you was.

"Go on, Bucky. Want your cum inside, want to feel you fill me up again." you moaned against his parted lips, darting your tongue out to taste his mouth.

The needy tone of your voice sent Bucky to the edge first. He uttered a string of curses under his breath as ropes of his cum painted your walls with their warmth with triggered your orgasm. Your body convulsed as waves of pleasure ran through your veins, starting from your fingertips down to your toes. Bucky kissed you and swallowed your moans as his thrusts slowed down.

It took a while for the both of you to recover from the intense fucking. Bucky nuzzled your neck with his nose, his heavy breaths warming up your sweaty skin. There was a short moment of peace that followed, the tension gone and was replaced by a heavy feeling.

You swallowed hard and slowly regained your senses. The release cleared your mind and the memories of the heated exchange from earlier were quick to come back. Bucky's accusations echoed in your ear and they were so clear it almost felt like he was saying them to you again.

Suddenly, you doubted Bucky's intentions when he promoted you. Was he really impressed of your skills at work or was it because you let him fuck you?

"Get off of me." you said, pushing at Bucky's chest until he straightened up.

Ignoring the emptiness you felt when his cock slipped out of you, you hopped down from the table and started fixing yourself. In the many times you had slept with Bucky, it was the first time that you felt disgusted with yourself.

You turned your back to Bucky as you adjusted your underwear, pulling down your skirt and pressing your palms against the fabric to iron out the creases. Your breath was heavy as you processed what had just happened. And just like that, your reserve broke and the strong facade you had built crumbled down into pieces, leaving you vulnerable.

"Hey, are you okay? Did I hurt you?" Bucky suddenly asked when he heard your sniffing, the darkness in his features gone.

His eyes were back to blue and there was nothing but genuine concern when he saw the tears in your eyes. Bucky tried to approach you but you quickly backed away from him, your arms wrapping around yourself as protection.

"Did you hurt me?" you scoffed. "In more ways than one, Bucky." you quickly added, wiping away your tears hastily with the back of your hand.

You were about to walk out of the conference but decided that it was probably time for you to actually speak up about everything. How you felt for him and how much you hated him for coming at you like that.

"I was going to admit that I like you. I thought about it and figured that I was too proud and a bit selfish for not considering your feelings when I rejected you." you explained.

Bucky blinked in confusion, "What? When?"

You shrugged, "The day you brought in Mackenzie. And I was more hurt than mad that you did that. Because you knew how much this job means to me and you had used it against me. You basically took advantage of my weakness, for what? To get me to cave in? Even when I clearly told you how fucking scared I was of the consequences of whatever kind of relationship we have?" you huffed out.

You didn't allow Bucky to speak, not yet. Not until you were done making him understand why you had been so hell-bent on keeping things professional.

"I wasn't born into a rich family like you, Bucky. I had to work my way up to where I am. Unlike you, I have a family to support and if I lose this job, it's not only me who would suffer. And it won't be easy for me to find another one, not after the reputation I'd have once we get busted." you further explained.

"I told you about it so many times and I wish you listened. Because maybe we could've figured shit out. Or I don't know, maybe the fucking was too good and you only wanted me for that." you shrugged.

Bucky quickly shook his head, "No. God no, you're more than that."

You chuckled again, a fresh wave of tears flooding the corners of your eyes. "It most definitely felt like it when you accused me of fucking Sam."

"Fuck, I'm sorry. Let me explain, please? I didn't mean to, I was too--"

"No, Bucky. You didn't listen to me when I told you how I felt about us. Now you're going to know how it feels to not to get what you want." you sternly said before walking over to the door.

You turned back at Bucky and refused to let his expression get to you. He looked devastated, his eyes glassy from the tears he had been holding back, his lips parted as he finally realized what he had done.

"Expect my resignation letter by tomorrow. As soon as we're done with the launch, I'm out."

-

The Match Special Tags:

@marvelslag @weird-mumbling @propertyofpoeandbucky @lostinthoughtsandfeelings @mostly-marvel-musings @squishybabies @megzdoodle @suchababie @annathesillyfriend @xhollycowx @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog @5-seconds-of-mendes @gogolucky13 @countonthesun @iloveshawnieboi​ @learisa @borikenlove @scarlet-natasha89

Everything Bucky Tag List:

@ddowii @jessou893 @stealapizzamyheart @bagelofthelord @mxnt @dontputyourfckingdrinkonmytable @jeeperky @ohladymacbeth @wildflowergubler @supraveng @twinerd14 @buckysmar @bakugouswh0r3 @sweetcoldharmony @wintersfilm @charminivy @amelia-song-pond @iamvalentinaconstanza @mcubqrnes @im-squished @tcc-gizmachine @sipsteacasually @prettyintopeerpressure @weloveyasmin @est19xxshit @bloodhon3yx @dressed-in-prada @lizette50 @thatfangirl42 @sunflowerbunny2 @unmagically @okiegirl24 @sugarpunch-princess @enlyume @vvipgotbb @slimeyderp @lyoongx @just-deka @nobody-will @jaziona92 @elisebuitron @dpaccione @suvikamahes98blr @buckybarneshairpullingkink @earthtonav @x-judyjude-x @nani-kenobi @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @belladonnabarnes @iloveangstposts @weenersoldierr​ @asemistablehundredyearoldman @reidbuck @lizzarooni @girlfriday007​ @bonkywobble​ @lost-in-the-stars03​ @its-yasbxtch​ @whoth3hellisbucky​

[yhwhsdaughter]

oh, in that chase could i get headcanons or Scenario of Deidara With a fem!S/o who is part of the royal family (of his respective nation) but it´s also (and opposite of how it has to be a princess) a ninja of anbu level and it becomes a traitor of her nation when they discover the relationship

I’m still not that far into Naruto, so apologies if Deidara is a bit ooc. Hope you enjoy ✨

𝔻𝕖𝕚𝕕𝕒𝕣𝕒 𝕄𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣

As a member of the royal family, you had to abide by the etiquette that was imposed on you at a young age. It was important that, as the nation’s only princess, you act graciously.

You never found the appeal of pretending to be someone you were not, often rebelling against these royal rules.

However, you wouldn’t have to worry about these for much longer. Near your sixth birthday, an assassin would infiltrate the palace killing all members of the royal family, except you, before he was intercepted.

Left as the sole heir, you were destined to take the throne but because you were too young to rule an entire nation, self-appointed leaders began to appear. A civil war ensued, tearing the once peaceful country into shambles.

You had been sent to live with your uncle, the Third Tsuchikage of Iwagakure while the aftermath settled down.

The village was surrounded by mountain ranges, built from the same stone as those. Villagers, especially shinobi, were headstrong. They had rock-hard attitudes they applied to their lives. In fact, many of them practiced Earth Release techniques.

You quickly took an interest in becoming a shinobi to distract yourself from the pain of losing those closest to you. It wasn’t a healthy coping mechanism but your uncle allowed it. He thought if you used that as an outlet to let your anger and negative emotions out, you would eventually healed.

He was partly right. The events that occurred during your youth marked you permanently and would have led you into a darker, self-destructive path if it wasn’t for Deidara.

You met him through training. He was rather talented and his presence brought you peace. Deidara always seemed relaxed, even in battle, but that wasn’t what attracted you to him. It was his passion. More specifically, his love of art.

The two of you were resting from practice. “You see (Name), art is a fleeting moment of beauty that vanishes gloriously.” Though you weren’t necessarily an artist yourself, you nodded, holding your chin like a wise old man with a long beard. “Hm, art is explosive?” “Exactly!”

Being the Tsuchikage’s niece, you had more insight than the average genin. From time to time, you’d eavesdrop in conversations between high ranking nin and your uncle. “(Name) we know you’re there..” “!!!”

Your skills as a shinobi had improved dramatically throughout the years. Still, you were forbidden from joining any type of elite force as you were still an heir. “(Name)-sama, your safety is a priority. One day, you might become the next Tsuchikage if not the Queen of your country.” “Ugh! Uncle Ōnoki will never step down. He’s too proud to choose a successor.”

Deidara reluctantly let you braid his hair. He knew you were upset and knew that this was one of your most peaceful ways of distressing. Had it been someone else, he would have blown them away. “Deidara, you’re so lucky you get to join the Explosion Corps” you sighed mournfully.

The man in questioned mediated on your words. “I like using my clay sculptures in missions—” You interrupted, “They are great.” “But I want to be greater than this. I want my art to be elevated, yeah?”

Your fingers threaded gently down his scalp, giving Deidara goosebumps from the pleasant sensation. For someone who behaved rather roughly, you sure were tender with his hair. “I heard uncle talking about one of the village’s kinjutsu. It’s only passed through generations..”

Intrigued, your blond companion shifted positions to look at your face. “Supposedly it allows users to knead chakra into objects. Perhaps with your—”

It seems Deidara was thinking the same as you. “I could combine that with my Explosion Release!” He grabbed your hands, “(Name), do you know this technique hm?” You shrugged, “No. Only when I become—if I become Tsuchikage, I’ll be taught this.”

Deidara, initially excited, slumped. “That’s too long.” You couldn’t help but chuckle at his change in demeanor. “Are you in a hurry or something?”

Looking into your eyes, Deidara closed the space between you both. His stare felt intimate, speeding up your heart. “If I were to leave the village, would you come with me?”

You blinked in surprise before biting your lip guiltily. “I would love to, but I can’t. As much as I hate it, my duties lie within the village and my country.”

Deidara looked down, absentmindedly playing with your fingers. He said nothing but he didn’t have to, his actions spoke louder. “Why would you want to leave the village anyways? And, how would the two of us live a-alone?”

At your naivety, Deidara stood up ready to go but you grabbed his hand, stopping him in his tracks. “Wait. Don’t leave me..”

“Would you be able to locate the location of the scroll that contains it, hm?” You stood up, still not releasing from. “I guess so, but why—”

“Could you just do it…please..”

Perhaps you knew from that moment what Deidara had planned but you pushed yourself to think otherwise.

As promised, you used your skills to find where the scroll was being kept before passing on that information to Deidara.

He ran his fingers up your arms before settling on your elbows. “This face.. its so beautiful it should be considered art..” one of his hands settled on your waist while the other cupped your cheek. You figured what he was trying to do and kissed him. Passionately.

It lasted a while. Before this, neither of you had made a move. There were always the longing looks and casual yet intimate touches. Everyone around you noticed the closeness between the two of you, even deciding that you’d make a good couple. “You should go to sleep.”

“Okay..” you bid him goodnight. “See you tomorrow?” He smiled, “Sure.”

It was the middle of the night when you were awoken by loud explosive noises. Some of them shook the tower in which you lived. Clicking your tongue, you detangled yourself from the covers, running towards the window.

Curses left your mouth as you connected the pieces together. “Damn him..!” He’d really done it.

You rushed to get dressed and chase after Deidara. Though you were technically not allowed to leave the village, you could sort that out with your uncle later. You struggled to put on your shoes, jumping around in the darkness with one foot while the other refused to enter the shoe.

You weren’t given the chance as shinobi filled the room. Meeting your eyes with the Tsuchikage, disappointment reflected in them. He knew. He knew that you were the one that had given Deidara the information. The two of you were practically inseparable.

Bringing your other foot down, you didn’t spare anyone a last look before running towards the window and jumping. Shinobi were quick to follow but Ōnoki stopped them. “Let her go.”

The Tsuchikage was showing you the ultimate mercy he could afford. He was never a father figure to you, he knew that Deidara was the only person left who you loved.

Besides, you were an extremely skilled nin despite not joining a special unit. It was probable you would make matters more difficult for them. Not to mention, that no one knew if you’d stolen any secret techniques either.

You tried. You desperately tried to find Deidara now that you were considered a traitor. A traitor to your country and Iwagakure. There was no use going back.

Truthfully, you were lucky the Tsuchikage allowed you to go without repercussions. Like Deidara, you were now a rogue nin without means to travel or survive.

Speaking of which, Deidara seriously considered taking you with him even if it was by force but upon further thought, he couldn’t.

You were better off without him. By stealing from the Tsuchikage, Deidara knew he’d become a traitor and a fugitive. It was safer for you to not be associated with him. Maybe you could find a prince to marry or finally become the Fourth Tsuchikage.

His heart would heal with time. Deidara would be able to forget you, your face, your mouth, your soft lips..

Two years would pass before you found information regarding the whereabouts of your beloved. Word had it that there was a bomber for hire. People’s description of this individual sounded incredibly familiar so you sought him out.

Deidara had been hired by a mysterious person. He’d been given an address to meet and discuss the deal but they hadn’t shown up.

The place was bare so it couldn’t be a trap, but as the seconds trickled by he couldn’t help but doubt. As he was about to leave, a certain figure tackled him.

Deidara had not sensed them. Were they in the room the entire time?? He could barely process this as the cloaked figure grabbed his wrist and pinned them to the side of his head.

During the struggle, the hood fell revealing the individual behind this attack. You smiled, though the anger behind your eyes was clear. “I thought..” your hands tightened around his wrists “I had made it clear that you wouldn’t leave me.”

Not a lot of time had passed but you had become even more beautiful. Deidara couldn’t help but stare. Your face showed signs of maturity; eyes sharp and those sensual lips molding into a straight line.

You had abandoned everyone, everything you knew.. for him? You’d become a traitor, a deserter, a rouge nin for his sake. Was your love for him truly that strong?

Upon spotting the tongues on his hands, you tilted your head curiously, bringing back some of your innocence.

“Well, we can work with that.”

[neocity-sarai]

Simulations [PART 1]

❃ pairing: reader x mark lee (divergent! au)

❃ alerts: making out, suggestive content, language, violence/ injuries, blood, angst

❃ song rec: find you by zedd ft matthew koma

You remember it all. You remember the morning of your choosing ceremony, the way your parents and brother smiled at you when your crimson blood fizzled into the bowl of burnt coal. 

Dauntless. You were born and raised in Dauntless, the faction of the brave- the faction of teetering between life and death. You were sure of yourself, you would climb the ranks like rungs of a ladder. And that- you did. You trained as an initiate soldier under the leaders until you rose to the top of your class. When it was time, the faction held a ceremony for inducting you into their ranks- you were one of Dauntless’s fearless leaders now. You’d walk among your mentors as equals instead of their student. Looking back on how you were as an initiate, you were scrawny. You didn’t have much muscle on you, you had no idea how to shoot or how to engage in combat. The amount of times you cried out of frustration, staying up late in the training ring just to improve. Luckily, you had Mark. Mark was the same age as you when you were initiates, his frame only a little bigger than yours. His family lived in the same sector as you. He was always sweet. The familiarity of his doe eyes and carved cheekbones, the way that his bangs flopped flat a little over his eyes. When your instructor assigned you both as combat partners, Mark held your waist firm as he helped you strike the punching bag in front of you.

 You remembered the way his warm breath fanned on your neck and how your skin felt aflame to his touch. Many nights, you spent sparing with each other and downing energy drinks until the break of dawn. You felt yourself trusting Mark more than you had expected yourself to, his giggly outbursts made you smile and it felt like you weren’t alone. You endured every struggle together. Even when the other girls picked on you for being weaker or for latching on to Mark, he always defended you no matter what. After a couple years, you realized you watched Mark mature into the man he is today. His build is packed with toned muscle, and his hair curls over his forehead artistically- his hands covered in scars and old bruises. His face has gotten sharper too, his jaw tenses when he’s concentrated on something and his eyes glint with obsidian fire during training. Mark knows when the stand firm, rather than being an innocent, laughing mess- his demeanor morphs into something more powerful. It is no surprise that you two had surged to the top, being chosen as Dauntless’s’ next leadership. Though, Mark still treated you like a longtime friend of his, his cheeks still redden when your brush hands. 

[4:00 PM]

Before you could become fully deemed as leaders, you both had to undergo one last test. You and Mark would have to do a partner simulation, a board derived from all the other factions watching you both with hawk eyes. You were lead into a blank room, the walls empty of any words or any decor as you were motioned to sit in a chair next to Mark. The Erudite woman who had pale skin and ocean eyes glared at you before attaching neuro-nodes to your temples- the wires connecting over to Mark. With no emotion, her voice cold, “Lean back.”

You look at Mark beside you, “Are you ready for this?”

He answers you in a soft tone, “If you are.”

Nodding, the woman jabs a syringe of violet liquid into the juncture of your neck, a wave of vertigo taking over your brain. You can’t feel your fingers and your eyelids feel heavy, all you can hear is Mark’s groan in the room.

When you open your eyes, you find yourself in a room of mirrors. The ground feels cold underneath your back- Mark isn’t beside you either.

“Mark? Where are you?”

Looking around, you only see reflections of yourself- multiple views making you dizzy. For a few moments, you hear Mark’s stern voice, “Y/n? Hello?”

“Mark I’m over here!”

“Hello?? Y/n?”

Mark can’t hear you. He can’t even see you. You rise from the ground, your knees shaking as you continue to call for Mark. Your heart sinks when you start to hear a low gear-grinding sound, the mirror walls are starting to enclose in you. That’s right, you were afraid of tight spaces. You heave in and out of your chest in order to try to calm yourself, your legs shaking uncontrollably. The walls are closing incredibly fast. You run across the floor, mirrors chasing you and glaring at you wherever you ran. You scream for Mark.

“Where are you?! Mark?! Help me!!”

Finally, you catch a glimpse of Mark in a corner mirror yet his actual body is nowhere to be seen. You scream for him to not move. All he can do is yell out your name, his brows furrowed with anguish. In a quickened speed, the mirrors start to buckle down towards you- noises screeching into your eardrums. You have to do something. When you turn around, three items lay on three pedestals: a baseball bat, a nail and hammer, and a lighter. Without hesitation, you’re immediately drawn to the baseball bat. Tossing it in your hand, you swing it into the mirror in front of you as hard as you can. The impact makes an ear-deafening sound, the mirror shatters into a thousand shards- some of them flying to nick your face. Through the mirror, Mark stands with a shocked look on his face, “Y/n?”

You practically trip through the mirror, you feel yourself falling before you can even reach out for Mark.

“Y/n! Wait!”

You’re falling- your eyes opening slightly to the ceiling of the white room that you’re sitting in before shutting your eyes again. This time, you’re standing in a field of buckwheat by the faction border, the gate that surrounds the entirety of the city grounds. You feel Mark’s frame bump against your back as he jolts from the contact.

“Y/n- oh god, you scared me.”

You throw your arms around him in response, his words coming out in a flurry of stutters, “That was close, wasn’t it?”

You nuzzle into the crook of his shoulder, “I thought I couldn’t find you and the walls were closing in and I had no-.”

Before he can pull you tighter against his chest, you hear a low grumble come from behind you. In an instant, you detach from Mark, turning to face a bloodthirsty carnivore a few feet away. You’re back to back again, one wolf threatening to leap at you in a few seconds, one other wolf in front of Mark as well. Mark tries coaxing the wolf, saliva dripping from the edges of it’s gleaming teeth. When you look beside you, there’s two pedestals to your right and two pedestals next to Mark as well. Your eyes glaze over the pound of steak that sits on the surface yet you grab the small handgun instead. You assume Mark does the same because you hear him click the safety off. 

Your breath turns shaky, your heart is beating out of your chest. You’ve learned to shoot but you’ve never shot an animal before. Mark turns his head to the side to talk to you, ���On three okay? I’m right here, don’t be afraid.”

You suck in air into the chamber of your lungs, cocking your gun before the growling wolf, it’s eyes like shiny, yellow orbs. 

Like a slow, painful countdown, Mark begins, “1...2...3.”

You shoot together, bullets ringing in the air as you feel the blow all the way down to your bones. It knocks you off your feet in time for Mark to steady you with his arms. 

“It’s over now. It’s over.” he says. Mark was tough but he never wanted to kill.

You squeeze your eyes shut, not wanting to see the carcasses of the two wolves- the smell of blood wafting below your nostrils. You feel sick. When you don’t open your eyes, you feel warmth disappear from your body as you hear Mark calling your name. Suddenly, you feel yourself becoming submerged in icy water, your lungs screaming for air. Opening your eyes, all you see is the murk of the water, you don’t feel Mark next to you. Swimming to the surface, the weight of your water-logged clothes feels as heavy as gold bars. Coughing, you swivel around for any sign of Mark. You’re in the middle of the ocean, the sky is a stormy sage color as ash gray clouds swirl into a cyclone. It reminds you of the story your mother told you as a child: a pirate who was lost at sea, trying to navigate the high waters in search of treasure. 

You scream Mark’s name as loud as you can, struggling to stay afloat. There’s no answer. You decide to dive back into the depths of the ocean, swimming downwards to get a better view. When you catch a shadow sinking to the bottom, you immediately recognize Mark’s body. You waste no time to heave him closer to you, kicking your legs until you reach the surface. Holding Mark’s body is difficult, his eyes are peacefully closed as his hair lays soggy against his forehead. You rub your thumb against Mark’s cheek, “Mark? Wake up! Mark?”

He doesn’t answer you, his head falls limp in your touch. Why wasn’t he conscious? What should you do? You look around, your body freezing from the icy temperature when you don’t see any nearby land. Your limbs go numb. Despite the freezing pain, you grip onto Mark’s jacket, both of your bodies slowly losing traction. You’re both sinking. When you’re down under, you feel your breath hitch. Is this the end? Will the simulation fry your brain? Will you drown and lose everything? Mark’s always had the fear of drowning. He’s mentioned that ever since he had an incident of falling into the river.

Finally, you feel the ocean fall away. Your hair and your clothes are still wet yet you feel yourself sitting on a windy terrace. You’re high up on a skyscraper, the cold wind blowing at your face and it makes you shiver. You feel Mark rest his head on your chest, you’re still cradling him. Sweeping wet hair out of his eyes, you swipe your thumb on his cheek, “Mark? Are you awake?”

He flutters his lashes a bit, his eyes opening to adjust to his surroundings. 

“Y/n? Where are we? What happened?”

You turn to look behind you, the terrace dropping down into the city grounds. You were sure you were at least on the 50th story of a tower. You feel petralized in fear, you never liked heights either. This was the simulation test- the test of fears and what you would do to overcome them. Or in a corrected term, manipulate them. 

“Hey, look at me.”

You snap up to face Mark, his endearing eyes boring into yours, “We’re in this together. Just like always.”

Nodding at him, you whisper, “Right. Together.”

The tight beam that extends from the terrace you both sat on to the platform by the next building over does not go unnoticed by you. You feel like you want to throw up, “They don’t expect us to cross do they?”

Mark huffs as he runs a hand through his jet-black hair, “I think that’s why they put us right in front of it.”

Mark stands up first, placing his foot onto the concrete beam to check its sturdiness. It doesn’t seem to move. You see Mark turn back to you, the wind rustling his hair and his jacket, “I’ll be with you the whole way. Don’t look down and keep your eyes on me.”

In that moment, you questioned if you ever fit into dauntless. I mean, you had to if you got this far. You always admire Mark for his strength and his bravery, could you be like him? Mark goes first, one foot in front of the other as he attempts to shuffle along the concrete beam. He fastens the balls of his feet to the ground in hopes the gusts won’t send him falling to his death. Your heart pings, a tear threatening to slip out of your eyes. You place one foot onto the beam, your other foot still on the terrace. Mark calls out for you, “Slow and steady. Take your time.”

You feel your knees wobble like jello, you’re afraid that they’ll give out any minute. Placing your hand on your chest, you bite the drawstring of your jacket in order to calm yourself. The drop below you looks extremely menacing, you can even see all the roads that line the ground under you. Immediately, you feel the beam shake from the movement of the wind against it. You try to hold your ground, steadying your feet on the thin beam. You miscalculated. You miss-stepped. You don’t even register when blood-curdling cries escape from your throat as you lose your footing and tumble off the beam. Mark’s figure screaming for you grows smaller and smaller as you fall away. You shut your eyes, is this it? The wind surges through every layer of fabric that covers you, hair whipping against your face painfully. 

That’s when you feel a body hug you, arms wrapping around your frame. Mark screams, his chin resting on your shoulder. He says, “I’m not letting you go!”

That’s the tightest you ever have held Mark. You take in his scent, his locks brushing against your eyes- the feeling of his arms encasing your body. You give him a comforting squeeze, “You should’ve gone on without me.”

When you’re sure that you’re about to collide with the ground, you hear an applause. You hear an audience clapping for you and Mark after you gasp up from the chair you sat in, you claw for air. Mark does the same, his chest heaving violently as sweat trails down his face. The erudite woman strips off your neuronodes, clicking her tongue at the both of you. 

“Did we fail?” You hear Mark ask her.

With the same emotionless voice, she says, “That you’ll have to find out.”

The woman leads you both to an open auditorium, numerous stands of screens reside in the center of the room. On the jumbotron, it reads: “Congratulations. Welcome to Dauntless Leadership.”

You feel Mark grab your hand out of shock, “We passed?”

The first person to approach you is Taeyong, one of the mentors who oversaw you and Mark during training. A wide smile extends from one ear to the other as he motions you both into his arms, “Congrats you two. You’re officially dauntless leaders now.”

You eye Mark with surprise, your jaw open, “But we didn’t make it across. I fell?”

“That might be true but Dauntless is about courageous sacrifice. It’s about loyalty.” You snap up your eyes to a woman, one taller than Taeyong. Judging by her silver uniform, her tattooed head, and her gorgeous green eyes, she must be one of the higher ups. She shakes your hand first, “You two make a good team, sacrificing life in order to follow your principles for the other person. We need kids like you.”

Mark exhales, “No way.”

Taeyong pulls you both into a group hug, “We’re gonna be celebrating tonight!”

When Taeyong lets go, Mark swings you in his embrace, “We did it!”

You smile at him, “You saved me Mark.”

Mark grins until his cheeks rise, “No, I just did what I needed to in the moment.”

“But you could have crossed without me!”

Shaking his head, Mark stiffens, “Didn’t I say earlier? I wasn’t going to let you go.”

[8:00 PM]

That night, the party went on for hours. The Dauntless Pit is what they called it- the deep cavern where all the excitement happened. Tables were filled with feats of roasted chicken and mashed potatoes, leaders and initiates filling their plates with the morsels. Once you claimed your portion of food, you sat next to Mark towards the end of one table. He grinned at you, sipping his metal cup of orange juice. Taeyong made a cheers to the both of you, the dauntless leaders banging their cups to the table like a mantra- a sign of respect and honor. Some of the younger kids you supervised training for congratulated you too, you remember how the girls made puppy eyes at Mark. Of course, he was oblivious to it. Laughing, you feel a hand on your shoulder. You are met with a view of Lucas, one of your other comrades, “Y/n! Mark! I was just looking for you! What do you say to a good ol’ game of capture the flag?”

You raise your eyebrows at Lucas, “I’m fine with it if Mark’s okay with it.”

Mark nods, setting his cup down, “Let’s do it. We can go right now.”

Like that, everything felt like it was falling into place. You adjusted the strap of your dart gun that was slung around your shoulder, advising your team of a plan. Naturally, you were the team captain for one group and Mark the other. You saw him a formidable opponent as he knew your most used attacks and you knew his. Lucas laughed beside you, his gummy smile widening, “Mark’s gonna lose tonight!”

You nod, “Let’s beat him first. We can’t get too ahead ourselves.”

When it was time to go, you and Lucas led your team of initiates to the metal train. One by one, you ran with the train cars as they shook on their wheels that screeched against the tracks. You hoisted yourself into the door with ease, something you had trouble with when you first became an initiate. By the time your team made it on, Mark and his group had already packed themselves into the train. Mark gives you a smirk, “Just because we’re friends, it doesn’t mean I’ll go easy on you.”

You cackle, socking a punch into his clothed shoulder, “Don’t get too cocky Lee.”

Turning away, you see Lucas and Selene, one of your friends as well. Lucas whispers into her ear, “Are you sure they’re not dating yet?”

Selene giggles, a blush climbing up her cheeks. You make sure to shoot ice daggers from your eyes to Lucas and Serene while you mutter at them. 

“Quit it.”

You pray Mark doesn’t hear their teasing. After years of training together and advancing together, you always denied your crush on Mark. You kept trying to find excuses as to why you shouldn’t like the innocent dork turned dauntless leader. You fail at that. It’s impossible when Mark talks to you as if he likes you back or the way he’d help you learn new skills with an endearing look in his eyes. You’d rather not ruin the friendship you have, especially now that you both had a faction to lead.

“That’s our cue y/n.”

Mark pinches you slightly before flying to jump off the moving train. His group of initiates follow him with ease, many of the tumbling out in waves. You think to yourself, you can appreciate the way Mark looks. The way his figure is tight-fitted with black vests, black shirts, and black combat boots, the way his hair curls on his forehead. Why is that you admire Mark in times of urgency? Lucas snaps you out of your thoughts before following him to make your exit- you all leap off the train and onto the gravel. Following suit, you and Mark lead your teams to an abandoned part of the city. As always, buildings tower into the starry night sky, blocks and cones marking safe zones. Piles of rubble provide shelter during the game. You and Mark stop ahead of the group, turning around to face them.

You say, “Rules are easy, the goal is to obtain the other team's flags. Just don’t get shot.”

Mark holds up his gun, “Right, as y/n said, these babies are loaded with dauntless stun darts. You’ll feel stinging pain for about 10 seconds but it won’t kill you. Best of luck to everyone.”

Both of your teams part, your jade green flag in your hands. Mark holds a bright yellow one in his. 

Lucas snickers, “So, what’s the plan?”

You advise your team, “We should hide the flag somewhere that’s out of sight. Knowing Mark, he’ll climb to a vantage point that’s high off ground. We should hide ours low to the ground, set up a trap.”

And that’s what you do. You find one of the abandoned buildings that’s on the far side of the area, planting your flag in the center of the circular platform. 

“Alright everyone, half of you form a circle around the flag. Make sure you keep formation, Mark’s team will try to break you up. Other half is with me.”

Lucas stays behind to bolster the strength of the guarding ring, the rest of the initiates circling around the flag. Gripping your dart gun tighter, you and Selene lead you team back outside the building as you debrief them of what you predict Mark might do. You instruct them to lay lower to the ground, blending with the shadows of the debris that conceal certain areas. 

“The important part is the element of surprise. Mark likes order and having the upper-hand. We have to divide and conquer.”

When you make it to the middle area, you and Selene crouch behind a pile of concrete rubble as you motion your team to follow suit behind you. One of the girls on your team points at the tower that’s in view, the neon yellow flag sitting at the top. Just as you expected, Mark hid it on a high place which meant that only a couple initiates had room to guard it. 

Selene whispers at the team, “Most likely, Mark and his team are prowling towards the base of the tower. Everyone should scatter and blend in. Y/n and I will take on Mark and the guards up top.”

Like that, all of you skip across the ground- aiming your scopes to the distance in front of you. In an instant, stun darts fly in storms, causing whines to reach your ears. Some of your initiates get caught in the line of fire, falling as they cradle their legs and arms. You have to keep pushing on. You and Selene make it to a pile of debris that’s closer to the bottom of the tower. Selene puts her blonde hair into a ponytail before nodding at you, “I think Mark’s guarding on top. I’ll cover for you on the staircase.”

You nod back at her, patting his shoulder with your gloved hand, “Let’s go.”

Shooting the guards at the entrance door, you swing it open with ease. Selene takes down the guard who’s on the first platform of the staircase. He yelps in pain, glaring at Selene as she daintily smiles down at him, “Oops, sorry about that!”

Selene follows behind while you take down some more initiates one by one, their pained grunts the only noise in the vicinity. Finally when you reach the top of the staircase, you hear more initiates yelling from where you first entered. Selene grins, “I’ll cover for you! Go take down your boyfriend!”

Before you can scold her for her words, she takes off down the staircase again- firing more shots when she runs. Inhaling, you kick down the door- shooting the first boy that you see in sight. He drops his gun, clutching his knee in pain as he attempts to scoot to the corner of the tower. Then, you’re met with Mark who stands right in your way of the flag. Defensively, you aim your dart gun at him, “I don’t hurt you but you’ll have to move aside.”

He quirks his eyebrows up at you, a smirk gracing his pink lips, “Why haven’t you shot me yet then?”

To his dismay, you shoot him square in the foot as he clatters to the ground with a pained grunt. His gun makes a sound when it crashes to the ground, scattering towards the other boy that lays helpless in his position. Just before you can wrap your fingers around the flag’s stem, you feel Mark wrap his arms around your torso, pulling you down. A shout escapes from your throat when you both go down together, your body on top of Mark. You try to struggle out of his grasp, wiggling as much as you can.

“Give up y/n, I got you now!”

Mark’s face contorts with pain when you use your elbow to jab him in the rib, his grip not relenting even a little. 

“This is so unfair! You’re way heavier than me!”

Mark laughs at you, “This is all part of the game, I’m not letting you win.”

That’s when you remember your own words. The element of surprise. You have to catch Mark off guard. With a surge of confidence, you turn your head to face him as his dark eyes are riddled with confusion. He has no idea. You shift forward, kissing a peck to the hollow of his neck. Just like you expect, he releases his grip before scrambling to sit up- his face is utterly flabbergasted. He turns red, the sight of him being so embarrassed makes you burst into laughter, he doesn’t look so tough anymore. Though, you don’t waste time. You advance towards the flag, waving it around in Mark’s shocked face. Even the boy who sits in the corner stares at you wide-eyed.

You jump and down in joy, “We won!!!”

You waste no time to blaze it through the tower window, the small figures of your teammates hooting and cheering on the ground. You hear Mark stutter, “H-hey! That’s not fair! You-”

Turning around, you press a finger on the ball of Mark’s button nose, “Gotcha!”

Mark and his teammate sulk behind you when you walk down the stairs in victory. Selene and Lucas so high that you feel like you can get sucked into the dark sky, silver stars swirling above you. The taste of winning sure is sweet.

[10:30 PM]

“How’s it feel to eat dirt Lee?”

He laughs at you on the way back to the Dauntless base, he leans against the wall of the train, “Whatever- you backed me into a corner.”

“And fair and square!”

Mark rolls his eyes, laughing, “I’ve won other times- this is nothing y/n.”

Lucas chimes in, “Mark’s just butt-hurt we won.”

Mark yells back, “Am not!”’

“Are too!”

You raise your voice, “Alright boys, that’s enough.”

All the three of you erupt into a fit of laughter, pushing each other as the initiates stare at you with bewilderment.

“Do you want to hang out for a bit more? I’m not tired?”

You raise your eyebrows at Mark, “After that? You’re not tired? Not tired from your beating?”

Mark shakes from laughter, “Don’t do that! Agh, you know what you’re doing.”

You let Mark lead you to his suite anyway. In Dauntless, most of the rooms looked like jail cells. They had grey concrete walls, beds that were as hard as nails, and only shared bathrooms. You recall the memories of when you and Mark had to sleep among dozens of initiates, the toilets didn’t even have separators. It felt like torture. When you moved up the ranks, Taeyong placed you in the leader suites- two large studios for each of you. Upon entering Mark’s room, it almost feels homey. The walls are still a drab grey yet there are black panels that line the area above Mark’s headboard, his bed made neatly. Mark goes to open the sliding door by his closet, the door opening up to his balcony. Mark chuckles, “Isn’t this better than the old dauntless rooms?”

Playfully rolling your eyes at him, you reply, “Of course it is. Anything is better than the gross bathrooms.”

He walks over to you, “Do you want anything to drink?”

“No thanks, I think I’m good.”

For a few minutes, Mark perks up, bouncing with a pep in his step, “Do you mind if I change real fast? I feel sweaty.”

You nod, “I won’t be going anywhere.”

Sitting on Mark’s bed, you wait for him to come out of the bathroom. Everything in his room is orderly, from his clothes and his desk, everything's in it’s place. The room feels like Mark. When he comes out, you giggle at his clumsiness as you imagine Mark hastily fumbling with the buttons on his pajama shirt.

“You silly, the buttons aren’t right.”

You don't realize what you’re doing until you slowly unbutton each button on Mark’s black shirt, a red blush creeping over his face. He flicks his eyes to you, biting on his lower lip before looking down at your fingers. You try to ignore the erratic beating in your heart, the heat that travels up your back.

“There, all finished-”

When you look back up, you realize that Mark is only a few centimeters away. You memorize every knick in his skin and every eyelash that lines his eyes. Even in the poor lighting of his room, Mark still shines in front of you. The golden glow travels along Mark’s hair and onto the fabric of his shirt. You feel your breath hitch in your throat, “You’re so close.” That’s all you manage to say.

Mark whispers, “Can I kiss you?”

He searches your eyes for some kind of refusal. When he doesn’t find any, he crashes his lips into yours, his bottom lip folding over your own. You move your hand to Mark’s neck, tugging back on the hairs on his nape. He kisses you even more passionately, embers sparking up in your stomach. It’s no lie you’ve dreamed of kissing Mark for a long time. Mark rests his calloused, scarred hands on your waist as he pulls you into him, your noses bumping together. You feel Mark’s tongue push against your own, you had no idea Mark could kiss anyone like that. Pulling back, you stare at him, ‘You know- I just wanted to say that I’ve always admired you. Not for your looks but about your ability to help others and your selflessness, how brave you are and-”

Mark shuts you up with another heated kiss, pulling you down into his bed. He rests his forehead on yours as he holds your hand in his lap, “There’s something I need to say y/n.”

You listen to him, not wanting to miss a word, “What is it Mark?”

“Y/n, I like you.”

You pause before smiling to yourself, “Are you sure you want me? I’m kind of-”

“You. That’s all, no one else.”

You nod, pulling yourself into Mark’s lap, “Very well then Lee.”

You continue to massage his neck, sipping on his lips while you do so. You detach from him, nimbly undoing the buttons of his shirt. When he shrugs the garment off, you take note of the large dauntless flame tattoo on his chest, running your fingers over it. He stares up at you, placing his hand over yours when you glance down his toned body, his stomach packed with muscle. Mark proceeds to kiss up your neck, a moan eliciting from your throat. After taking off your long-sleeved sweater, you let Mark bloom purple marks on your skin. You hear him kiss against your collar bone, “It feels like I’m dreaming right now.”

You can’t help but laugh, “You’re not dreaming.”

Mark helps you undo your bra, your chest flushed against his. When you flip your hair out of your face, Mark’s eyes are filled with awe, “How are you so beautiful?”

You rest your chin on his shoulder, “I should be asking you that question.”

After revealing yourself to Mark, you have no regrets. He’s seen every part of you, marking you his territory when he kisses down your neck and your chest as you’ve called him yours. The balcony door is still open, a light breeze floating through Mark’s room. Resting your head on his chest, you hear him exhale into the pillows. He still wraps a strong arm around your figure, making sure you’re secured against him. You tap on Mark’s chest, “Are you awake?”

“Yes.”

“What are you thinking about?”

You don’t expect Mark to ask you such a question. He sighs, “Y/n, do you want to run away together?”

You sit up, resting your head on your propped up elbow, “Mark, what do you mean?”

He turns on his side to face you, his cheek sunken into his pillow, “I heard in a meeting that Erudite plans to take over Dauntless. I’ve always thought about it: why be one thing? why be sorted into categories when we can just be people?”

Reaching a hand over, you play with his hair, “Wow, you must’ve thought about this huh? But where would we go?”

Mark’s eyes show a glimmer of determination, a fierceness that you’ve never seen in anyone else, “I hear there’s people outside the wall. Like a resistance. If we join them, couldn’t we be free?”

“Maybe. Who knows. We don’t know what’s out there. Isn’t that story a legend?”

Mark shakes his head, his eyes scanning your features, “No. I heard some Dauntless guards talking about people outside the wall by the border. They’re out there.”

Finally, you resort to laying on your back, sleep threatening to pull you under. You answer, “Mark, it would be so dangerous. What if the resistance doesn’t take us in? At least here, we have protection.”

Mark’s voice turns cold, “But not for long.”

You’re not sure what to say next. Instead, you feel Mark turn away from you as he shuts his eyes. Leaning forward, you press a kiss to his bare shoulder, “I’m sorry. I just- my family’s here and the initiates, I’m scared to leave them behind.”

Mark doesn’t move, his eyes are still screwed shut. 

“I know. It’s wrong of me to expect you to drop everything and go. I don’t know myself.”

“Hey, look at me.”

Mark turns to look at you, his face illuminated by the soft glow of the moon that shines through his window. You press a kiss to his cheek, your lips lingering there, “I’m with you. No matter what happens. Even if it means we have to leave, I’m willing.”

Mark slowly blinks, his lashes accenting his eyes. He leans up to kiss you once more, his thumb tracing the edge of your chin, “I’ll protect you. I love you y/n.”

You freeze from the sudden ease in Mark’s tone. You’re still sure of it. You press a kiss to the corner of his lip, “I love you too.”

[9:00 AM]

When morning comes, you jolt up from the nightmare that causes your body to shake with anxiety. You gasp, sitting up in Mark’s bed. What’s worse is that you don’t find him next to you. Throwing off the covers, you check the bathroom and the balcony. Mark isn’t here. You start to panic, you pray that Mark had woken up early to get breakfast or for some Dauntless meeting. After slipping on your shoes and putting on your clothes, you exit out of the Dauntless Leadership wing and head towards the pit. You feel a ball drop in your stomach when you see hundreds of initiates swarming the pit like a hive, all of them single file in the cavern. Some of the other dauntless leaders are corralling them like cattle. What’s even weirder is that the initiates don’t seem normal. 

You spot Lucas and Selene by the corner of the room, their eyes laced with some kind of magnetic trance. Everyone seems to be walking in a robotic manner like something’s controlling them from within. Why weren’t you controlled? That’s when you remembered Mark’s words. Erudite planned to overthrow Dauntless and the other factions. You step back into the shadows, quietly scanning the room for Mark. It’s impossible to see with so many people in one area. Before you can slink away, you feel a hand cover your mouth the instant you try to scream- you fall your eyes close from the loss of consciousness. 

When you awake, your vision is blurry and it’s difficult to hear anything. You see blobs of blue moving to talk to a white-haired woman dressed in navy, their lips saying, “Is she divergent?”

“I’m not certain, testing isn’t complete yet.”

You try to shake yourself awake, your limbs are tightly locked into the chair that someone has put you in.

“Ah- she’s awake.”

You blink twice, your eyes still adjusting to your environment. The white-haired woman looks down at you, her features as hard as ice, “Well hello y/n.”

“Who are you?”

“My name’s Jeanine. I lead Erudite. It seems as though our crafted simulation doesn’t work on you.”

Lifting your head, you stare around her. People dressed in blue coats pump syringes into tubes as they tap on glowing screens as well. Jeanine laughs, “I’m here to ask you a few things y/n. What did you get on your aptitude test?”

“Dauntless.”

Jeanine creases her eyebrows, inching closer to you, “I don’t think you’re telling me the truth.”

“What do you want me to say? I’m dauntless born.”

Jeanine lets out a cynical laugh before smoothing down her bobbed hair, “Get rid of her. We’ll find the rest on our own.”

You start to yell at Jeanine, “You won’t get away with this! I have no idea what you’re talking about!”

That’s when you can’t say a word. From behind Jeanine, Mark enters your view. His eyes are emotionless, the soft glow that once sparked up in his irises is now absent. He’s still wearing his black uniform from the night before, a pistol gripped in his hand. You hear an erudite employee ask, “Shouldn’t we do it outside?”

Jeanine shakes her head in refusal, her wicked smile curling on her lips. You scream Mark’s name, “Mark! hey! It’s me!”

He shows no sign of recognition. Like a mechanized soldier, he grips the back of your neck. Your hairs feel like they’re being tugged on too hard, the cold barrel of his gun pointed at your temple. Tears break like a dam as they flow down your cheeks, whimpering at Mark doesn’t do anything, “Mark..please… it’s me!”

Mark only grips your neck harder. His jaw tightens at the sight of you, his fingers on the trigger. If you weren’t restrained, you’d lean over to touch Mark’s face. You’d try to remind him of who you were and what you shared- how you told him you loved him for the first time last night. But you can’t. You just sob, “Mark..please..”

In a second, you hear a pin drop ring in your ears. Mark swivels away from you as hard as he can, firing the gun straight at Jeanine. Jeanine drops to the ground, blood spilling from the back of her thigh as she screams out in pain. It’s so fast that you have trouble registering what’s going on until Mark yanks off the belts that fasten your hands to the armrests of the chair before screaming at you, “Y/n! Get out of here now!”

“I’m not leaving you!”

You spot Jeanine pressing her hand to her spewing wound, the other erudite members worriedly clamoring over her. 

Mark looks angry, his expression looks like he’s fighting some unknown force within him. You shake your head, “Let’s just run now! Just like you said!”

Mark grits his teeth in pain, his hands tightening into fists as if he’s resisting the urge to lunge at you again, “You have to leave now! Go where I told you! Follow the tracks!”

As much as you want to drag Mark with you, you know there’s no time. Instead, you close the distance in between you before kissing a messy kiss to his lips as you place your hand on the back of his neck. For a few seconds, you feel him kiss you back, his eyes are screwed painfully shut. Forcefully, Mark pushes you away from him- launching you towards the exit.

Jeanine yells, “Get him under control!”

You realize that you have to leave Mark behind. You grab one of the handguns that sits one of the racks before dashing out the double doors. Tears are streaming down your face, hot and painfully slow. Your legs hurt from the pain of running, you have to keep running. You have to get out of here- all of Dauntless is under simulation. They’re being played like puppets on a string, all for Erudite’s divine control. Remembering Mark’s words, you run as fast as you can. Your chest heaves with a lack of oxygen, you fly along the tracks of the train by the center of the city. Luckily when you hoist yourself into one of the train cars, you don’t see anyone else.

 You ride the train as it speeds towards the border wall that encloses the city. Leaning on the train wall, you sob into your knees, remembering Mark’s smile when he had first helped you onto the train car when you were initiates. You miss him. You miss his breathy laugh, the scent of mint and pine needles, the way he would play with your hair to make you grin. You miss your combat partner and you miss your friends: Lucas, Serene, and the others. You begin to realize that you had left your family behind too as you imagine their cowering figures in some hiding spot behind the Dauntless complex. Or maybe, they were put in a simulation too- walking around like mindless zombies as Dauntless soldiers order them around, gun barrels pressed to their backs. You can’t stop the tears that burn your skin, your fingers yanking at the fabric sweater that suffocates you. 

When the train stops, you raise your gun at any potential attackers as you carefully tread towards the wall’s entrance. For one last time, you stand in the grassy field. You take note of how there’s no clouds in the sky and the way the sun beats down on your face- the city reaching up to the heavens. When you look back at the city in the distance, all you can see is what you’ve lost. What you’re leaving behind. Still, there’s a small glimmer in your chest when you think of what lies on the other side of this wall. All the potential possibilities that could help you get your family back- Mark back. There’s no definite answer, whether there is a resistance force or nothing but a deserted wasteland. You’re about to find out yourself.

@czennienet @neowritingsnet @nct-writers​

[PART 2: Borderlands]  [PART 3: Redemption]

[joachimnapoleon]

Meet the Bonapartes--Louis (2/4)

(Part 1 can be found here) (And here are links to Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3 on Pauline)

***

Napoleon's plan to marry Louis to Hortense was met with a marked lack of enthusiasm by both parties. Aside from having acquired a jaded view of women (possibly as a result of the affliction he suffered in Italy), Louis also happened to be in love with someone else. Prior to the wedding, he would write a twenty-page letter to Hortense containing what was essentially his life story, and in which he confessed his love for a woman named Sophie, describing her, and his feelings for her, in great detail. Hortense, meanwhile, had acquired a negative view of Louis, because of his behavior in an earlier failed love affair between him and one of her cousins. However, Hortense claims, she was willing to give Louis the benefit of the doubt, and dismiss "his conduct toward my cousin" as "merely thoughtlessness on his part." Her former mentor, Madame Campan, visited Hortense to speak in Louis's favor. Hortense was not entirely convinced. "Louis seems to me to be kindhearted and good," she conceded to Mme Campan, "but I do not like the disdain with which he pretends to look upon women and which often appears in his conversation."

[Hortense de Beauharnais]

But Napoleon was adamant about the match, seeing in it a strengthening not only of the ties between the Bonaparte and Beauharnais families, but also as a safeguard for a potential Bonaparte dynasty. "We may never have children," Napoleon told Josephine (according to Hortense's memoirs). "I brought Louis up myself; I look on him as a son. Your daughter is what you cherish most on earth. Their children shall be our children. We will adopt them, and this adoption will console us for not having any of our own." But Josephine, who had initially favored the idea, grew increasingly ill at ease over the marriage as the wedding approached. Hortense also claims that Louis's older brother Lucien poisoned Louis's mind against her, after his own request to marry her was shot down by Napoleon. "I do not know what he said," Hortense writes, "but Louis became uneasy." It was then that Louis wrote his twenty-page letter to her and "begged me in return to describe my past life to him in full. It would have been difficult for me to give him any striking facts on the subject and, when I returned his letter, in accordance with his request, I merely replied that for a long time my life had been known to him."

"If your popularity and society have not spoiled you," Louis replied, "you must be an angel. There can be no middle ground. You must be all good or all bad." Hortense took this as a compliment. "I could not suppose that, admitting the existence of the two alternatives, his opinion could be otherwise than favorable."

The marriage contract was signed on 3 January 1802 at the Tuilleries. Napoleon provided Hortense with a dowry of 250,000 francs, to which Josephine added another 100,000. The civil service took place the next day, and the nuptial blessings were held afterwards. After Cardinal Caprara had blessed the newlyweds, Joachim and Caroline Murat came forward, and requested to receive a nuptial blessing as well, as their marriage had taken place before the religious ceremony was reinstated. "This double ceremony left a disagreeable impression on me," writes Hortense. "The other couple were so happy. They were so much in love with one another.... I felt as though all the happiness lay on one side, all the unhappiness on the other."

The "honeymoon" period was almost nonexistent. Napoleon had flown into a rage at Louis over complaints Louis had made about the marriage not being announced publicly. The personalities of Louis and Hortense never quite managed to synchronize on any level. Louis found fault with Hortense over the most trivial things, and Hortense could barely disguise her increasing dislike for her husband--or the fear his unstable, unpredictable behavior had begun to instill in her. 

My nerves gave way. Only tears brought relief. My husband, touched and affected by the sight of my grief, sought to console me, but the harm had been done. My only sentiment towards Louis became one of fear. I dared no longer smile or speak in his presence. It always seemed to me he was on the point of losing his temper.

Nevertheless, the couple's first child--Napoleon Charles Bonaparte--was born the 2nd of October, 1802. Another son, Napoleon-Louis Bonaparte, followed two Octobers later. The Pope himself officiated the ostentatious baptismal ceremony at Saint Cloud.

[Napoleon Charles Bonaparte, first child of Louis & Hortense]

Napoleon continued to show favor to Louis; but Louis occasionally had a different view of these "favors" than his older brother. He saw Napoleon's appointment of him as governor of the "Department beyond the Alps," which would have required his relocation to Turin, as a form of exile, and refused to leave for this new station until after Napoleon's coronation as King of Italy. When the time came, he pleaded ill health and did not accompany Napoleon to Milan for the ceremony. Suffering from acute rheumatism, he had temporarily lost the use of his right hand. By this point he was something of a hypochondriac, and often imagined his illnesses to be far worse than they actually were. His doctors recommended mud baths in St. Amand. Napoleon, still clinging to the idea of making a soldier of Louis, gave his brother command of a reserve corps in the Army of England which would enable him to set up his headquarters close to St. Amand to take the suggested cure. He departed with Hortense and their two children. The mud baths seemed to improve his health.

During the 1805 campaign, Louis remained in Paris as Grand Constable. To everyone's surprise, after his initial reluctance to take over the role of military governor, he displayed remarkable energy. He was not yet aware that Napoleon was in the early stages of preparing him a throne. But rumors soon spread that the Prussians were planning to invade France via the Netherlands. Napoleon ordered Louis to form the Army of the North, to defend the northern departments, as well as Antwerp and the Batavian territories. Louis arrived in Antwerp the day before the battle of Austerlitz; in spite of the war coming to a rapid end, he received orders from Napoleon, via Marshal Berthier, to stay put in Holland. He was also instructed to make sure the Dutch covered "all the pay and supplies of the Army of the North; it must also buy and supply you with all the artillery and transport horses you may need... the Army of the North is not to cost the Emperor anything."

Despite Napoleon's orders, Louis handed over command of his new army and headed back to France upon learning of the peace of Pressburg. Napoleon was not pleased by the unexpected meeting with his brother in Strasbourg. The Emperor finally confided to Louis his intentions of forming a kingdom in Holland, but did not yet go so far as to say that he intended Louis to rule it.

But Napoleon could see only two viable options for Holland: it must either be annexed to the Empire directly, or preserve its independence by accepting an imperial prince--Louis--as its king. The Dutch government were reluctant to forfeit their republic, but recognized that resistance to Napoleon was futile. They assented to the rule of Louis, with the understanding that no French officials would be appointed except in the king's personal household (Louis would break this promise soon enough), that freedom of worship would be maintained, and the current system of Dutch law left in place. Once these points were arranged, Louis was informed by Napoleon that he was to be King of Holland. Louis himself had little choice in the matter.

Louis was initially reluctant to take the throne, but soon warmed to the perceived advantages of being out of his domineering brother's direct grasp. Hortense, meanwhile, dreaded the idea, as well as the visible change in Louis's demeanor.

I admit that my husband's calm manner surprised me. I did not believe he was ambitious, yet I recognized that he was well pleased with what had occurred. Until then every change had been a source of annoyance to him. But now he enjoyed the idea of becoming his own master and, what was more, becoming my master at the same time. No longer would any social decorum, any sense of obligation restrain him from exercising his rights over me. Freed from the proximity of his brother he had no longer any cause to fear him.... For a moment I had the idea of flinging myself at the Emperor's feet, revealing all the torments I suffered with my husband, and begging permission not to be obliged to follow him into a foreign country where nothing would restrain those traits in his character, which I knew so well and dreaded so intensely.

The official Dutch "offer" of the throne was presented as representing nine-tenths of the populace. The formal proclamation of Louis as King of Holland took place at the Tuileries on 5 June 1806. He was solemnly reminded by Napoleon that he was still a French prince. In his response, Louis spoke of his pride in having worked to defend the Dutch people from invasion the year before, the honor he felt in being called to rule over them. He assured Napoleon that his people--he was now referring to the Dutch--would feel love and gratitude towards the Emperor and France.

[Louis Bonaparte]

Louis and Hortense left Paris a week later. The Dutch gave them a joyous reception as they made their way through the country, every small town vying to outdo the other. Hortense held a dismal view of it all. "The martial escorts, the honors, receptions and speeches only wearied me." At one point, she remarked darkly to Louis that the receptions were similar to those the French had held to celebrate the arrival of Marie Antoinette.

Though he had been thrust into the role against his will and accepted it with some reluctance, Louis was determined to be a good king to his subjects, and take care of their interests--which would inevitably put him at odds with Napoleon, just as it would for Murat in Naples years later. "From the moment I set foot on Dutch soil," the newly-crowned Louis declared to his legislature, "I became Dutch." "Which explained in a sentence," writes biographer Andrew Roberts, "the problem Napoleon was to have with him over the next four years."

***

Sources:

Atteridge, A. Hillard. Napoleon’s Brothers, 1909.

Broers, Michael. Napoleon: Soldier of Destiny. 2014.

Broers, Michael. Napoleon: Spirit of the Age. 2018.

De Beauharnais, Hortense. Memoirs of Queen Hortense, Vol I.

Masson, Frédéric. Napoleon et sa Famille, Vol I (1796-1802), 1907.

Roberts, Andrews. Napoleon: A Life. 2014.

[justasparkwritings]

Codename Cupid: Chapter 8

Previous: Another Shot At Love Pt. 2

Pairing: Min Yoongi X OFC, Park Jimin X OMC

Genre: Secret AgentAU, AgentAU, Government Agent AU, Slice of Life

Rating: NC17

Word Count: 3.5k

Warnings: Swearing, Legal Alcohol Consumption, Degradation, Humiliation, Verbal Abuse, Horrible Family, Bullying, Sibling Rivalries, Homophobia, Toxic Masculinity

Summary: Codename Suga joins Codename Cupid at her parents house for family dinner. It’s both everything he imagined, and so much worse. 

Codename Another Shot at Love Part 3

Fall Post Graduation

           Park Yoongi, Codename Suga, arrived at the Lee residence dressed to the nines, a new suit, top of the line glasses and Ferragamo loafers that Hoseok had picked out especially for him. Nothing about his look screamed mid-level employee at a top-level bank, or government agent bent on destroying a company from within, which was the point. Namjoon had determined that to impress the Lee’s, Codename Valentine, Suga had to be runway ready. His hair was slicked back, and in his arms, a bottle of Makers 46, a bottle Cupid had ensured her father would appreciate. In his ear, a flesh-colored earpiece, specially designed, allowing his teammates, Codenames RM, Worldwide Handsome and J-Hope, to feed him lines when needed.

          Adjusting his spectacles and turning them on, Suga’s vision was momentarily blocked as the sensors began their job scanning everything and everyone insight, transmitting data in real time to his set up at OT7 headquarters. The glasses, a creation he had spent the better part of a year working on, were a modification of his third-generation specs. Not only could they recognize faces, scan for heat sensors, but log sounds such as alarm codes and lock patterns, decoding their passcodes in seconds. This was a marked improvement from the generation twos, which recorded sound and took up to 24 hours to decode. The recorded surveillance was wired through the major databases used by OT7 to track down faces of everyone Suga came in contact with. Tonight, their goal was to memorize every aspect of the Lee’s estate, transmit the layout into a CAD (computer aided design) drawing and print a scaled blueprint. They were also responsible for identifying every human in the Lee’s house, pulling names, birthdays, permanent addresses and social security numbers. In his glasses case, Suga had placed several microscopic microphones, which he placed on any surface he touched. They might not have eyes inside the mansion, but OT7 would have ears.

          “Park Yoongi,” The attendant declared as he stepped through the foyer and into the sitting room, where the entire Lee, Codename Valentine, family sat waiting for him.

          “Good evening,” Yoongi bowed deeply, a remnant of his heritage and a sign of respect.

          “Yoongi!” Euna said, standing and quickly wrapping her arms around his neck. Leaning in, she placed a delicate kiss on his cheek. “Mom, dad, this is Yoongi, my boyfriend.”

          Mr. Lee rose, looked Yoongi up and down before he spoke, “I hear you work for us. Good.”

          “Yes, sir, I do,” Yoongi nodded.

          “Your work is good, you fly under the radar, if you’re to continue this with Euna, you will need to do better,” Mr. Lee extended his hand, shaking Yoongi’s, before moving past him.

          “Sir, I brought you a gift, I heard it’s one of your favorites,” Yoongi handed the man the bottle and watched as he unwrapped it. His oafish hands tore through the tissue paper, impatient to get his hands on something he didn’t buy but eagerly wanted.

          “Ahh, a bribe, thoughtful,” Mr. Lee said before handing the bottle to the head of house, who had quietly walked into the room. She took it and carefully moved to place it on the shelf which housed an impressive collection of whiskey.

          Mrs. Lee looked at her cohort of older children. “Don’t be rude.”

          The three children rose and walked towards Yoongi. Towering over him, Dae-Seong and Jun-Seo glared down at him, a sinister smirk on both their faces.

          “Dae-Seong,” He said, squeezing Yoongi’s hand harder than necessary.

          “Jun-Seo,” He repeated the action, his hold lighter, his smirk faded into a thin line, laced with more concern than Yoongi imagined Dae-Seong could ever muster.

          “Yoongi,” Kwan-Min bowed before extending her hand, “Kwan-Min.” Her smile mirrored Euna’s, gentle and vibrant. Her eyes told the same story as her brothers, watch your back.

          “Nice to meet you,” Yoongi responded. Carefully taking a seat next to Euna, he smiled tersely at the family.

          “Yoongi, tell us about yourself,” Mrs. Lee requested. She slowly clinked the perfectly shaped sphere of ice in her glass, it slowly melting into the brown liquid.

          “Is there anything specific you want to know?” He responds politely.

          “Your file is thin, you don’t seem to want to advance at Lee Enterprises, so how’d you end up here?” Dae-Seong doesn’t mince words. Much like the booming timbre of his voice, his words cut straight to the point.

          “I worked in the Manhattan branch every summer of college, had two internships my junior and senior year, and then applied for an entry level position,” Yoongi could hear Namjoon, Codename RM, in his ear, repeating the fabricated story made ever more real by Hoseok’s ability to forge documents.

          “They moved you out here?” Mr. Lee questioned.

          “Yes, they asked if I would transfer,” Yoongi replied.

          “Why?” Dae-Seong was perplexed, no new hire was asked to transfer unless they were a problem worth handling.

          “They said I was polished, and my work was good,” Yoongi shrugged. WWH reminded him to lean into the nonchalance, the ultimate fuck-you attitude the Lee’s hated.

          “Seems vague,” Jun-Seo remarked. “Your childhood was rather bleak, wasn’t it?”

          “It wasn’t the best, but it was temporary,” Yoongi knew this was the line of questioning they’d take, and not just with him, with anyone not from the upper echelon, anyone not worth less than 100 million.

          “Your parents were, sorry, are, quite poor,” Dae-Seong pressed.

          “Poor to some is rich to others,” Yoongi answered.

          “But poor is still, poor,” Jun-Seo responded.

          “You haven’t dated much, either have you Yoongi?” Kwan-Min’s voice was velvet, soft and supple in the tense air.

          “I’ve had a few relationships, but none like Euna,” Mr. World Wide’s voice was clear and gentle, sell it Suga.

          “What makes her so different? Clearly you see things that we don’t,” Dae-Seong snorted back a laugh, it was a hideous sound, loud and haunting.

          “I see a lot of things in Euna. She’s thoughtful, considerate, she’s caring and funny. She accepts me for who I am, and makes me a better person,” Yoongi laid on the compliments like he hadn’t spent the last two weeks rehearsing them for OT7.

          It had taken him a while to list the characteristics he liked about Cupid, and ultimately had recruited WWH to write it for him. He stared at the words Mr. Handsome wrote, and was shocked that he still cared this much about her. Yoongi felt none of these things, none of these adjectives or memories that Mr. Handsome had strewn together resonated with him in the slightest. Cupid was a mark, a pawn in the play, nothing more.

          “Huh, lucky someone does,” Jun-Seo laughed, ribbing Dae-Seong and leading him in a cackle all their own. Yoongi glanced at Euna to see her jaw set, cheeks flushed, eyes glossed.

          “Jun-Seo, you have a guest,” The attendant from the front door announced, standing taught at the door. A blond-haired man entered, smirking with a hint of humor. Yoongi stared at his dazzling smile and kind eyes.  

          “You made it!” Jun-Seo stood to engulf the man in a hug, lips pressing aggressively to his lips. “I thought you said you were busy.”

          “I got away,” The blond responded.

          “It’s lovely to see you,” Mrs. Lee stood to embrace the man, followed by Kwan-Min. Yoongi watched carefully as Dae-Seong and Mr. Lee scowled, arms crossed, brows set. They didn’t have to speak their distaste for Jun-Seo’s apparent partner, it was written in their body language.

          “It’s lovely to see you too,” He said. His eyes didn’t glance at the elder males but landed squarely on Yoongi and Euna.

          “Lee Euna, is that how you greet me?” He questioned, a hand resting on his hip, hair lightly falling in his eyes.

          “I’m so happy to see you!” She bounded off the settee towards him, arms around his neck, holding him close. “I didn’t think I’d get to see you before the big trip!”

          Yoongi stared, dumbfounded, and blinked quickly, trying to understand the rapid change in her demeanor. Gone were the tears, the anger, the hate that was coursing through her body. It was replaced with care? Genuine excitement? What the hell is the big trip?

          “I had to get in one more family dinner before I’m gone for the month,” The blond smiled warmly at Euna, a twinkle in his eye as he glanced at Yoongi. “Is that?”

          “Oh! This is my boyfriend, Park Yoongi. Yoongi, meet Jun-Seo’s partner, Cho Jimin,” Euna said. The two men exchanged a handshake before sitting down next to their respective partners.

          “How long have you and Jun-Seo been together?” Yoongi inquired.

          “Hm, a year?” Jun-Seo replied, a hand resting gently on Jimin’s thigh.

          “Did you meet at work or-

          “Twenty questions with the twinks! Line em up, it’s time to play!” Dae-Seong yelled, earning a chuckle from his father. “First question, who tops and who bottoms? Follow up, is Jun-Seo as weak of a top as he-

          “Dinner is ready,” The head of house said, stepping into the room just in time. Rolling his eyes, Dae-Seong stood.

          “You’re gonna need your strength,” He winked at Jimin before brushing past them and heading for the dining room. Yoongi followed obediently and cautiously, taking his time putting one foot in front of the other as he followed the Lee’s. Pausing every so often, he carefully trailed a finger over a surface, leaving a singular mic, completely invisible, behind.

          The dining room was stunning, taken out of the palace of Versailles with a Korean twist, the marble floors and ornate chandeliers were out of this world. Flowers blooming in ancient vases, artwork that looked to be that of Picasso and An Kyŏn, Monet and Manet, lining the walls like the Louvre. There wasn’t anything the Lee’s money couldn’t buy, even 15th century originals were bound to become fodder in their quest for prestige.

          Draped across the table, a gold runner, glittering with what could only be described as actual gold flakes. Waterford Crystal glasses, and hand painted china rested delicately against the gold, the white shining brilliantly under the lights of the chandelier. Awaiting the guests, an endless array of traditional Korean food: Jjajangmyeon, Bulgogi, Samgyetang, Kalguksu, Galbi, Dubu Kimchi, Kimchi Fried Rice, with bowls of Hobakjuk as everyone’s appetizers, and Gyeranjjim waiting on a refined plate to be consumed with each passing spice.

          Yoongi’s eyes were wide, his lungs breathing rapidly to take in the scents of home, of familiarity. How peculiar to be eating the cuisine of his ancestors, of his blood, in a room with people who would willing spill each other’s.

          “Yoongi, sit next to Dae-Seong.” Mr. Lee instructed.

          Excellent, Namjoon muttered in his ear.

          “Dae-Seong, I hear that you’re making quite a splash as the Chairman,” Yoongi voiced.

          “Only bottom feeders eat my ass, Yoongi. For that you need to see Jun-Seo, appointment only,” Dae-Seong rolled his eyes.

          “Please, do not speak of your brother’s depravity at dinner. Save it for dessert,” Mr. Lee scolded, eyes hard on Dae-Seong.

          “When are we going to discuss Kwan-Min’s latest triste?” Jun-Seo inquired.

          “Now seems like the perfect opportunity,” Mr. Lee answered. “Dae-Seong?”

          In some sort of twisted ritual, Dae-Seong cracked his knuckles, then his neck, swirled a sip of whiskey between his lips and leaned in. Batting his eyes delicately at Kwan, he bared his teeth. Yoongi restrained from asking “you getting this?” to his team, because they were in fact, watching with bated breath.

          “The category is, colossal fuck ups. The reining champ, for the first time in, Euna, how old are you? Never mind, age has no number when you’re a twat. Kwan-Min, for a million dollars, explain how you found yourself cunt up with a political fundraiser? I’m sorry, a Republican political fundraiser?”

          Mrs. Lee gasped, her soup spoon dropping aggressively into her bowl, rattling the china. Euna didn’t look up, but quietly shoveled soup into her mouth, feigning ignorance.

          “Kwan-Min, how could you?” Mrs. Lee demanded.

          “If the rumors are true, and we’ll need Jun to confirm, Mr. Brady, I believe?” Dae-Seong inhales, eyes never leaving Kwan’s, voice even, “He’s particularly gifted in a few areas, and very well endowed and what was that other word? Oh yes, generous.”

          “Quite a generous tongue on that one,” Jun responded, shame flickering past his eyes in a brief moment before his resolve solidified.

          “How could you?” Mrs. Lee repeats again. “You are the second eldest of this family, the face of our philanthropy, and you are consorting with a known republican? Not to mention a man so cruel he, he,

          “He thinks Dae-Seong is weak,” Euna spoke. Her wavering voice echoed over the table, everyone’s eyes turning to her. “I mean, that’s what you’re doing, right Kwan? Find someone so repugnant that Dae is outraged, spurring on another break down in hopes he’ll OD and you’ll what, become chairwoman of the board?”

          “Fuck you for insinuating I make my decisions based on Dae. Do you live and breathe at his request?” Kwan spat, the heat from the food and the fight rising in her cheeks.

          “No,” Euna was incredulous, how could Kwan assume that?

          Through gritted teeth she responded, “Neither do I.”

          “For two million, Mr. Chairman,” Jun motioned toward Dae, “explain to us how you could be fucking a member of the opposing party, who has tried to ruin this family numerous times? Is the dick that great?” Jun-Seo pressed.

          “Don’t pretend that you haven’t fucked him, fag,” Dae laughed. “You two are the biggest whores in the game.”

          “That’s not true,”

          “The fact that you’re Eskimo siblings, not once, not twice, but have shared more than three sexual partners is revolting. You’re fucking freaks, sodomizing the legacy of this family for some log cabin taint who can’t even be bothered to pay the child support for the kids he knows about.”

          “How do you know so many categories of gay men?” Euna asked, eyes narrowing at Dae-Seong, “You been experimenting?”

          “Oh, don’t even get me started on you and your choices, Euna,” Dae rolled his eyes then glanced at Jun-Seo, who was sneering at him.

          “What could you possibly say that you haven’t before?” Euna cackled, a sound so foreign Yoongi can’t help but feel his eyes bug out.

          “Whoa,” Mr. Handsome says in his ear.

          “Oh shit,” RM responds.  

          “You’re not even worth discussing,” Kwan-Min stepped in, and swinging the last of her cocktail back, she turned to Dae-Seong. “I’m more interested in your affinity for homosexual stereotypes. Tell me, when you’re alone in your house, your wife sleeping in a separate apartment, cities away, is that what you’re watching? Is that what gets you off? Picturing a willing gaping hole, just waiting to be ruined? Or no, I’m sorry, but Jun, don’t you think he’d be-

          “A power bottom? Absolutely, he spends his nights ogling over submissive bears, trying to find one big enough to fill him, scrolling through chatrooms under, what was his username?” Jun-Seo doesn’t look at Kwan, he knows she understands what is about to transpire.

          “Beary-willing007,” They recite together.

          J-Hope guffaws in Suga’s ear, followed by a loud “oh shit!”

          “I can’t imagine how it would look if your little, what did you call it?” Kwan asked.

          “The twink or the fag?” Jun-Seo repeated Dae’s words so seamlessly, so effortlessly, to a blind eye it would’ve been hard to tell that Jun wasn’t Dae’s twin.

          “Both, if your nefarious activities and browser history was discovered, or dare a say, leaked?” Kwan raised an eyebrow.

          “You think you scare me?” Dae-Seong asked. “Summer, 2012, what happened to you?”

          “Why would you bring that up?” Kwan’s glare faltered, a subtle shift in her brow, the sneer dipping before returning at full capacity.

          “We need to know what happened summer 12,” RM stated, voice low as he jotted down the date.

          “You want to throw dirty laundry out into the open, might as well air yours,”

          “Fuck you,”

          “I didn’t start this,”

          “Yes you did,”

          “Jun-Seo, care to tell us what happened to you winter, 2014?”

          “No,”

          “I thought so,” Dae pointed his knife at each of them, “Before you go accusing me of being a fucking homo, check that I don’t have your history sealed and filed.”

          “Did you get that?” RM asked.

          “Yeah, got it,” J-Hope responded.

          “And Euna,” Dae turned his attention to his youngest sibling, who sat quietly eating her food. “Don’t ever bring a bottom feeder home again, unless he’s going to eat my ass, you hear me? Or I will do to you what was done to Kwan-pussy-ass-Min.”

          “Fuck you Dae,” Euna spewed.

          “Excuse me?” He yelled, standing to his full height.

          “I said, fuck you,” Euna repeated with a little more gumption.

          “Oh Euna, little Euna, too smart for everyone, too polite and meek to ever be taken seriously, to fucking boring and oblivious to know that her boyfriend’s only date her for access or career status, so stupid that she can’t recognize that the only reason she’s getting the company is that she’s so incompetent, no one will believe her when –

          “Dae-Seong!” Mr. Lee yelled.

          “Don’t bring a fucking knife to a gun fight, Euna, I will end you.” He seethed.

          “What is your problem with Yoongi? He’s the first man I bring home and you-

          “What do you not understand about our family? What do you not understand about the caliber of person we need to be with in order to-

          “What, watch porn, order sex workers and pray the gay away?” Euna yelled.

          “Watch your tone,” Mr. Valentine said.

          “You’re acting like you don’t have secrets, like your marriage is pure and good, it’s not Dae. I don’t blame her for leaving you, anyone with a modicum of sense would see that you are nothing more than a toxic, manipulative, alcoholic coke head, who only has his job because daddy loves him the most.”

          “You think your relationship with Yoongi is going to be any different?” Jun-Seo spoke up, deflecting from the rising anger in Dae. “What makes you so special?”

          “First, I love him,” Euna responded, earning a scoff and eyeroll from every member of the Lee family. “Second, if he makes it out alive from this dinner with you assholes, then he truly is the most resilient person in the world. Finally,”

          “Thank fuck,” Jun-Seo exclaimed.

          “Finally, he was raised to be kind and respectful, unlike the four of us,” Euna concluded with a haughty exhale and a glare at her mother.

          “Wait – are you sure that’s not just Seokjin in a new suit?” Dae-Seong cackled, nodding at their father who also laughed.

          “I hate this family,” Euna rose and tossed her napkin on the floor, a dramatic flair that sent her brothers and father into a fit of laughter.

          “You act like you aren’t the ingrown hair on the taint of this family, and I think I speak for all of us when I say that I would love to extract you,” Dae said.

          His words hung in the air as Euna walked out of the living room, Yoongi on her tail.

          Catching up to her, Yoongi reached for her hand, which she hastily pulled away.

          “Euna,” His voice was measured.

          “Can we please just go?” She whispered, tears beginning to stream down her face.

          “Yeah, can I just run to the bathroom quick? Grab the coats and I’ll meet you outside,” He pressed a kiss to her forehead before following one of the workers to the nearest bathroom. Hoping to shake the worker, Yoongi deftly exited the bathroom before wandering down the hall. He followed the sound of voices and stopped short of what he assumed was Mr. Lee’s office.

          Mr. Lee stood next to Dae-Seong, a fresh glass of whiskey in hand. “Did you read the brief on UAE?”

          “Yes,” Dae-Seong answered.

          “I want your recommendations tomorrow by 9AM,” Mr. Lee instructed, “None of that pussy shit you drew up for Spain, either.”

          “Pussy shit in Spain is child’s play in the Emirates. I’ll bring something, nuclear,”

          “Don’t jerk me around like you do with your pathetic excuse for a cock, Dae. I do not want to have to fire you and replace you with Jun-Seo,” Mr. Lee slammed his glass down before retreating through a door Yoongi hadn’t seen when he’d glanced in.

          “I’m sorry father, I will have the materials ready,” Dae’s voice was pathetic, deflated in the wake of his father’s anger. He hated being belittled and demeaned, hated the hurt his father hurled at him, the constant need for him to be better than everyone else. He hated how easily it came to Euna, how she could understand the numbers and draw connections within seconds of being presented with the problem. He hated Euna’s prowess, how businessmen and women flocked to her, a cello prodigy, ballet star in training, perfect grades, whored out to different branches so she could learn the business. Every fuck up Dae-Seong had made resulted in Euna’s success, and their father and mother, though more covertly, had egged his jealousy on.

          Yoongi placed a mic on the inside of the door before slipping back into the hallway and out of the Lee estate, to Euna’s embrace.

          “Your place or mine?” He asked as he sat in the driver’s seat of his car.

          “Anywhere but here,” She responded, eyes blinking down tears as Yoongi drove.

Next: Searching for Seokjin Pt. 2

[ashleyswrittenwords]

The Queen’s Tournament

A ZeLink Fanfiction (Part One of Three)

(Art by the wonderful @ramibriidge)

Summary: Princess Zelda is ready for her coronation. Her court, however, is not. In an effort for a King, the ministers pressure the crown princess into agreeing to marry whoever champions in a tournament any man in the kingdom can participate in.

The Queen’s Tournament

The string was pulled taunt and she steadily aimed the arrowhead above her mark. Feet parted, arm steady, trust your gut and don’t overthink. She breathed in slowly and released the string. The arrow whizzed through the air. The arrowhead hit its mark squarely on the bulls-eye. She lowered the bow to get a good look at her marksmanship and a smile upturned her previous frown.

“You get better every day,” a voice said behind her. Zelda jumped; it was nearly right in her ear. She turned to see Link looking at the target past her. She lazily observed him and turned back, her smile thinner now. Link had been teaching her archery among other arts of combat for over a year now. It was a good expenditure of her energy, especially as of late. She shook her head and muttered, “I hate when you do that.” Then, she added, “Not good enough.”

The early morning sun painted a sky a light pink and blue hue. Link had gone to gather the arrows from the target and was walking back, making note of the dullness of the arrow heads. “Seems like it’s never enough. Are you looking to start a war, princess?”

She only took the arrows from him and shrugged without meeting his gaze, “So what? Maybe I am.”

Link watched her as Zelda fiddled with stuffing the arrows into the quiver. He was only half-joking. The princess had insisted they practice three times more than they were before. Zelda wasn’t acting as she normally did. Her usual excitement to learn dissipated into an odd obligation. It was her only free time away from her court, so it shouldn’t surprise Link that she wanted to increase it. Though her demeanor has changed and now she was going out of her way to train without him like a woman possessed. To say that she was worrying him was an understatement.

“I should go,” Zelda spoke without raising her eyes. As the sun rose higher the threat of her maids gossiping rose as well. They both knew that. The Hero and the crown princess meeting secretly in the dark – he could see it on tabloid headlines within the next day.

“Can you at least let me know what’s troubling you?” Link had almost gone to grab her hand as she turned away, but his reach withered to his side instead.

Zelda paused and turned back with eyes studying the red clay beneath them. They flickered to his for a moment, “You should know. You of all people should know.”

Guilt ate at him as he watched her saunter off. Her dark trousers would soon be replaced by an elaborate gown and her long-braided hair with something other. Link diverted his eyes elsewhere, scorning himself for looking at her like that. If anyone had seen him…

No one did. No one was ever out training here unless it was Zelda and himself. Well, now it was just Zelda apparently. A feeling of obsoletion shocked him and he pushed it away, eyeing the off-kilter marks left by Zelda’s morning training. It wasn’t all perfect. She still had a long way to go. But Link would be lying to himself if he was to say she wasn’t a natural. Zelda had talent. All she really needed was a little guidance and muscle memory. Link hummed to himself, a small smile gracing his lips. Once she’s done that for herself, then he’d be obsolete. And that suited him alright. It would mean he did his job.

Maybe she’d even dismiss him?

He had helped her defeat Zant. The castle had finally returned to normal. What else was he to do here? Link had offered advice to straighten out her forces and improve defenses. Zelda had followed through without much question. Really, what else was there to do?

Her advisors had insisted she get married. Zelda had resisted each time. When she finally requested that the court ordain her as queen, they were beyond irritated by her resolve. The ministers had compiled a list of suitors and she had rejected them all, so they rejected her request. Goddesses, she had been mad. That night she woken Link up and nearly pulled his arm off with how much she demanded to let her into the armory. He was barely able to throw a shirt on before trying to smooth over her anger.

“You can’t just murder your court,” he had said, that seemed to get through to her enough where she explained what had happened. It was the first time he had seen her cry. It still made him frustrated to think about it. Zelda had always seemed untouchable, the human embodiment of a queen. Why they refused to even consider her request was unfathomable to Link. She was level-headed, brilliant, and more than capable. In that moment, she was so vulnerable. He wanted desperately to protect her. Shield her from whatever was hurting her. But he couldn’t. This wasn’t Zant or some formidable enemy threatening her life. It was politics, a world Link wasn’t well-equipped in.

Zelda would be forced to marry soon if she wanted the throne. Hyrule was becoming unsettled without an absolute in power and the mourning period for Zelda’s father, the King, had long come to pass. And heaven knows the princess was too stubborn to step down from a challenge. So, when the crown princess had come to an agreement with the council in regards to marriage the kingdom was shocked and a heavy sense of burden fell upon the Hyrulian champion.

 --

Zelda was bored.

Her signature started blurring into scribbles as she signed off on a bill. She had been at the same activity for hours now. The door to the office opened and closed to reveal more paperwork. It seems like the lords and ministers were particularly excited about preparations today. Which meant they were spending more of the crown’s money. The weight of her head cramped her hand and she made a face at Impa who stood at the side of the room, busying herself with proofreading.

“Don’t look at me like that,” she said, making a gesture to the princess’s desk. Zelda stretched her arms upward, groaning, “Whatever has possessed the bureaucracy to write this much?”

“Your impending coronation. Remember?”

Zelda scowled, “At what cost, Impa?”

“As much as it takes to get you in a white dress. What did you expect when you agreed to that ridiculous competition?” Impa had been resentful since she had learned of the idea. She thought it was patronizing to the family’s legacy. Which wasn’t completely wrong in Zelda’s eyes, but the gears in her head were turning.

“That it will be exciting,” another signature and she laughed at her advisor’s grimace. “You agree with the rest that I must wed myself to someone. Courting is a spectacle for my court therefore I don’t see why finding a capable suitor shouldn’t be a spectacle that my people can’t ogle at as well. Men from different lands fighting for the honor of being king? It’s something out of a theatrical play.”

“And you’re comfortable with it?” Impa said, meeting Zelda’s eyes. The princess squirmed in her seat, feeling exposed. Impa has known her since she was a child, even advising her father for a time. No wonder she could read Zelda like a book. “I never said I was going to attend,” Zelda muttered.

“Zelda-!”

“Your highness?”

Impa and Zelda looked at the door in alarm. The squabbling between them squandered by the interruption. Link stood in the entryway in the attire of the royal military. To Zelda, it was still strange to see him with a lack of green. “Is this a bad time?” he spoke slowly, seeing the faces of the Impa and the princess herself.

“No!” Zelda said suddenly before her advisor could speak. “No, it’s a perfect time.”

Link looked at her for a long moment. He was always more formal with others around. But now, his eyes were soft and she averted her gaze at the small stack of papers he put on her desk. He had a knack of seeing beneath the crown, the jewels, and the gowns. It was a skill she had come to both scorn and adore. “A lord came by and asked that I give you this for approval. I don’t remember his name,” he muttered the last part.

“Did he say what it was? If it’s a revised bill about the candle budget I will march into the House of Lords myself,” Zelda flipped through it, pausing at a list of names.

“Ah, no,” Link masked a laugh with a cough, “It’s the names of who will take part at the suitor event.”

Zelda looked up at him in surprise, “Already?”

“Is it not next week?”

She looked back down that the list, scanning over the names and feeling his blue eyes watch her. Some she recognized, most she did not. Nodding more so to herself, “It is… it is.” Zelda felt ill. Any of these could be the next King of Hyrule. Suddenly, her plan felt flimsy. So many things could go wrong. The list spanned two pages and she wondered how the few days of competitions could weed out this many people. She dipped her pen into a pot of ink and paused just above the dotted line. Her eyes drew to the last name that seemed to be scribbled in at the last second. Her brows knitted together as she read it over several times just to be sure: Link Forester.

Zelda caught him as he slipped out of the door.

She scrawled her name on the document and handed it over to her advisor with a clouded mind.

 --

Zelda had been far too occupied with preparations that her time to train was suffocating by the day. Despite that, her training was felt to be more important so she practiced in her room and outside in the late hours of the night. It was taxing on her body, but her mind felt at peace. At peace meaning more room for determination than before. The event was publicized to the public as being a romantic affair. The inns around the castle were packed with travelers from abroad for tomorrow’s processions. Even if it turns into a worst-case scenario, at least the public’s morale has recovered. They were calling it the Queen’s Tournament in the papers. The notion brought a smile to her face. So, they did believe her to be the true queen. That was a comforting reality.

Impa had just left after finishing her last attempt to sway Zelda’s decision. It was for naught, there was an agreement she signed. Her word was given. Even if she wasn’t there in person the tournament would still go underway, which worked in her favor. Zelda approached her mirror and pulled the pins from her hair. Her locks spilled down her back and she waved a hand. Like a mirage, the features her mother passed to her faded into a gruffer appearance. Her skin wasn’t as smooth, her hair far darker, and her eyes of a different shape. Zelda was out of practice in her magic. Link had seen her do this once before and his attendance was entirely unsuspected, therefore she would need a different mask. As the thought crossed her mind, she felt overwhelmed – flustered. He did realize it was to win her hand in marriage, right?

Of course, he did. He had to know. The papers speculated who would be in attendance as the list wouldn’t be publicized until tomorrow. Cover after cover was gossip and rumors of Link being amongst them. Before she had scoffed and threw them in a bin. But now she stood in the mirror, still jarred by the news almost a week later. Zelda wasn’t naive, she knew he was more capable than the rest of the men she saw on that list. That stupid list with his wobbly handwriting on it. Her people loved him for all he had done, all the things he still does for them – for her.

Zelda looked back into the mirror to see her foreign features were fading with her wandering mind. She grew frustrated. No longer was she an adolescent child. She was a formidable mage, was she not? Zelda could wield the power of the Goddess if she chose to. A queen doesn’t pine after people. No, she wasn’t pining. Princess Zelda was simply taking note of her competition for her own hand.

 --

Perhaps he had been too hasty.

Link being too hasty? No, he was calculated. Precise. Thoughtful.

He stared at the attendant who stared right back. “Link Forester?” Link repeated, unsure if he had heard him correctly. The match in the man’s head seemed to spark and he fumbled with his quill, “Right, right. Of course, the Hero of Hyrule.”

Link cringed but nodded respectfully. He hated that title. It was all too formal. The man crossed a name out and waved him in. The building was recognized as an outdoor theater, but now it was a coliseum of sorts. The stage was deconstructed, and they were still moving targets into the empty space. It was practical, perhaps the only building in the capital that could house the tremendous amount of people that were expected. He had seen them already lining up in the early hours of the morning. He was led into a holding space that was being used for storing the props over the next few days. Excess targets, bows, and training dummies to name a few. Link felt excited. It had been a while since something serious was at stake. Sure, it would be far better if no one had to marry the princess.

He unbelted the baldric from his hips and set the scabbard against the crate, promptly hoisting himself up to sit on it. The gazes from the men in the room felt demeaning, but he retreated into his own head. Only a couple more hours of this, then he’d do it all over tomorrow.

Zelda said to him that all she wanted was to choose. There was too much in her life she had no control over. Of those things shouldn’t be the person she would spend the rest of her life with. Link stared at his hands, remembering when she announced the tournament to the press. Her speech didn’t waver, and her head was held high. However, he could see past that. He could see the way her eyes told him she was defeated. They finally told her they would vote her off the throne if not for this silly competition. She was hurting.

So, when the lord was thrown off by Impa’s loud voice in the office and tossed his chore to Link it felt natural that he’d write his name in too. Not to win her hand, but to give her the choice she wanted. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind, he would win and nothing in the contract said that the winner had to marry the princess.

The door shut loudly and someone else walked into the room. At least the attention was finally off Link. The interest in analyzing his competitors overwhelmed his thoughts and he obliged. There were several lords’ sons in the room, not that he knew their names, their clothes betrayed them. They were far too neat and proper to have witnessed any harsh training. Link made a categorized list in his head of the people his eyes met. There was a group of soldiers he recognized, none of whom he interacted with on a daily basis. Then, a Goron and a few odd Zora. Among the rest was a large Gerudo man that sat with some other boisterous men. Link vaguely recognized him as some kind of politician that visited from abroad from time to time. They seemed to have been drinking. Nevertheless no one seemed threatening, but there was a Hylian man that Link kept coming back to. He was set apart and near the opposite end of the room. Dark hair and a thin build. He wasn’t anything intimidating, but he was odd. Link felt a sense of distrust.

A bell chimed and the doors opened to the public. It wouldn’t be long now until the first event of the tournament was underway. The topic of the day’s competition was announced: Archery.

 --

Zelda had snuck her alias onto the list last second and took her seat on the far side of the room. Having the signature of the princess was certainly useful.  It was a surprisingly long wait, but soon enough they were all lined up to be introduced to the stadium. Link was two people in front of where she stood and he seemed to have noticed her. She glanced down at her hands, no her masking spell was still strong. Zelda felt giddy. It was amusing to be plain and blissfully normal. Even more so at a tournament centered around herself. No one had outright spoken to her, so she didn’t need to exercise an excessively deeper voice. She was never good at voice changing spells and it wasn’t the time for a failed attempt.

Link was asking if contestants could bring their own bows. The man handing them out denied it, insisting standard use had to be used. He sighed and set the bow he usually used during our training to the side. Zelda felt somehow touched by the familiarity. She hoped he didn’t expect her to be watching in the box with Impa.

“You’re not from around here, are you?” The man in front of her laughed as he spoke to Link, who turned just barely. “No. Not really.”

She took a bow, trying to make it look like she wasn’t interested. It wasn’t anything special, they were standard wooden bows.

The man ahead spoke again despite Link’s disinterest, “What do you do, kid?”

“I, uh,” he started, “I’m a goat herder.”

Zelda raised a brow as the guy began roaring in laughter. Link didn’t react much, just shrugged his shoulders. The line started moving towards the open doors that led to the open stadium. Introductions were being announced and the crowd was deafeningly loud.

“A goat herder marrying the princess? Hey, at least you’re shooting your shot, boy.”  

Link stepped out into the sunlight and the announcer boomed into Zelda’s ear. “Link Forester, the Hero of Hyrule!” The said hero visibly winced at the screaming audience. She knew how much he resented the title but seeing the berating man freeze at the words made her lips form a secret smile. He had been so affected he walked robotically out. The acoustics of the former theater were amplifying.

Zelda’s own introduction was small and plain. She was Yoland Romerok. A name she made up at the door. In the least, it was better than Shiek. It was true that she wasn’t good with names, goddesses help her children. There were three lines in the sand and she followed the group to the closest, situating herself in front of her own target. A handful of arrows sat in a small barrel an arm’s reach away. There were about fifty suitors that lined the edges of the stadium, it matched the list of names. The announcer rattled off typical archery rules for those unfamiliar. It would be rather long. There would be three trials and between each the suitors would be disqualified. The distances of the trials would be as follows: 25 meters, 50 meters, and 90 meters. The time would be set at ten minutes and the competitor would have that set amount of time to shoot all arrows in the barrel until scores were tallied.

The ten minutes began counting down. Yoland eyed the barrel and nocked an arrow. The bow’s string wasn’t too different from the tautness of her own on the training grounds. The target was closer than what she was used to. A perfect opportunity to try out this bow. The first was off and landed just above the bullseye. She caught her breath and glanced at her neighbors who took their time as well. The man who had taunted Link had missed his mark completely.

The next two arrows hit the eye and the last landed lower than she meant. Zelda smiled but humbled herself with a glance at the next two lines behind her. The ten minutes went by slowly, but eventually the judges walked by making marks. Several names were announced to leave, Yoland not being one of them. The man beside her walked away with heavy steps. There was an applause as a team of people came by to move the barrels and collect the arrows. During this time, she noticed a rather large man. Zelda’s stomach sunk. Lord Ganondorf had made the trek from the desert to represent his people. She diverted her eyes when he looked her way and swallowed thickly. He had asked Her Highness for her hand over the span of several years. A chill ran up her spine, she must have missed his name when she grew distracted by Link’s own.

The next trial was a distance Zelda felt more comfortable with. All four struck the red bullseye. Another set of men left the field. It made her wonder if they thought this competition was a different form a combat or perhaps simply nerves. The last competitor that separated herself and the hero left quietly. Zelda rubbed her sweaty hands onto her trousers and wondered briefly if Link thought they looked familiar. Speaking of which, she stole a glance his way before the last trial. He was looking past her, up at the stands. She followed his gaze and was met with the box the princess was supposed to sit. Impa was instead standing there, looking rather impatient. Link ran a hand through his hair and pulled the longest locks into a ponytail. Sweat dripped down the side of his face.

Zelda frowned at the increasing temperature of her cheeks and blamed it on the heat. She scolded herself, checked her hands to assure the spell wasn’t affected, and turned her attention to the reset time. 90 meters. She had practiced this.

“The last trial commences!” The announcer said boisterously. The stadium roared with the same enthusiasm. With a nocked arrow in her grasp, Zelda reminded herself of what she needed to prove to her court and the ministers that constantly doubted her intentions. She could hear Link already hitting his mark and remembered what he had told her about emotions. Don’t let it guide your arrow. Instead, channel it into energy. When she breathed in, she held the breath in her lungs. Her hand pulled the string taunt and she watched the target with indifference.

The arrow hit the edge of the red circle.

The next two arrows hit around the same area. A part of her worried they would knock the first to the sand. Fortunately, that wasn’t the case and the last hit above the cluster. Yoland Romerok leaned back to observe the target, then the competitors nearest. An older man hit the edges of the target. Link was already observing her own work, he hadn’t done too shabby himself. His gaze at her almost made Zelda want to be smaller. He was staring with a strange look in his eye before he nodded and looked away.

That was weird.

Zelda surveyed the remaining suitors. Fifty was narrowed down to fifteen or twenty. The masking spell was still working perfectly, but the eyes of Impa from above were drilling into the back of “Yoland Romerok”. There were a series of announcements to close today. Tomorrow’s theme was amongst them.

“As we all know,” the announcer shouted through the stadium. It was lucky for him that the structure was built with acoustics in mind because the tremor of shouts and hollers from the people were almost overbearing. “Our princess has a love for horses. What would be a better fitting contest for her heart than chariot racing?”

The princess’s heart leapt with the roaring crowd. A chariot race? She was kept in the dark about the competitions just as much as the rest of the stadium. Archery was merely an educated guess and perhaps hand to hand combat.

Horses, however? Her thinned lips quirked upward. This was Princess Zelda’s forte, after all.

 --

The cheering was odd. His name in other people’s mouth like it was their favorite word. It was, in the least, distracting. It was a hot day too, which added to the sweat. There were several instances where he would wipe his bow off with his shirt. This hadn’t happened with Zant. Midna would surely have made fun of him for being overly nervous. Zelda wouldn’t have reacted much different, he knew that. She liked to poke at him when she could. He knew she’d do great with a challenge like this. The princess had always had an affinity with archery and only ever needed a little guidance. It was commonly her stress that held her back with focusing on the target.

Link blew a breath out. Zelda wasn’t there, which eased his worries. The look she had given him after he had given her that list of suitors was indescribable. He harbored hope that maybe it was a good look of disbelief, not one of realizing a worse situation. Maybe she would understand if he explained. Even when he had gathered up the little courage he had for the situation she had grown scarce. Her days either spent in her chambers or her office.

He followed the rest back to the same room they had left earlier. One of the judges from the archery tournament came by to awkwardly shook his hand, “It’s an honor, Sir Link.”

Link swallowed and offered a smile, “Oh, thanks.”

The man lumbered away and started shouting about what time they had to be there the next day. Once Link began wondering what kind of race would take place the same small Hylian walked by him and towards the exit. He had given Link a weird look during the competition before the 90 meters that rubbed him the wrong way. Obviously, Link hadn’t taken a liking with this one. Not that he had given approval with anyone there. Every time he saw a new face he imagined Zelda with a new ring on her finger dismissing him of his duties. Not many of these fantasies included her being happy.

“What’s your name?” Link asked. He already knew, but he wondered what the man would sound like. What he didn’t expect was for Yoland to jump as if someone had accused him of murder. He looked young, younger than Link.

The man cleared his throat, “Yo-Yoland.”

Link raised an eyebrow. He didn’t look like this during the tournament. Yoland acted like he had a score to settle with someone, not like a boy being caught stealing.

“What’re you looking to do here?”

Yoland furrowed his dark brow, “Same as you.”

Link scoffed, “Doubt it.”

“What?”

They were interrupted for a moment by shouting, but Yoland looked irritated now. Link went on, frustration bubbling, “You looked angry out there. Who are you angry at?”

It had crossed Link’s mind that perhaps someone who wanted to disrupt the crown would compete and end up using the tournament for nefarious reasons. The vetting in the registration process was nearly nonexistent. There was a small competitor fee and an application. That was all. The thought of Zelda having to go through this in the first place already angered him. If she were to be harmed by the outcome, Link would feel at blame. How was he going to protect her when the threat is her husband?

Yoland narrowed his eyes, “I haven’t a clue what you’re talking about.”

Link gave him a long, cold stare. “Look,” he spoke lowly, “I don’t think you should be here. There’s something wrong and I will find out what it is.”

Yoland stared back and laughed bitterly to Link’s surprise. “Do you do this to all the suitors, Hero?”

“No, just you.”

“I’m honored,” he spat, turning on his heel. “Good luck.”

Part Two

[moonlitarrow]

Work In Progress

As darkness swallowed her, Gavriyal was consumed by so many emotions. Fear for her family, anger for Alenras’s boldness, apprehension for his motives. Resolve that she would never allow him to keep her from seeing her family, her child again. The last thing she could hear was Estel’s cries as she faded into unconsciousness.

When she woke, Gavriyal was surprised to realize that she was laying on a mattress. She was stripped of any weaponry she’d still had on her person--the dagger she’d grabbed as she’d been dragged through the floor gone. The room she was being kept in was of a fair size, but barren of any other furniture--as well as no windows, and no doors. Smooth stone made up the chamber. There were no chisel marks or tool marks, almost as though the chamber itself had just been formed naturally, rather than being carved away. Her brother’s magic, undoubtedly. She didn’t want to know just how he managed it, nor whether or not his magic would keep providing her with air. 

The door that opened had not been there a moment prior. There had been no noise to indicate its appearance, and none as it opened. Gavriyal sat up, scooting her back against the wall behind herself. No weapons, no armor… she was at Alenras’s mercy here and she hated that feeling. 

“Ah, she wakes.” Alenras said as he entered the room, smirking at her. His body language was relaxed, at ease--even amiable. Gliding into the room as though he was some magnanimous host, offering his hospitality--as though he had not spirited her away from her home, under duress. 

Gavriyal narrowed her eyes at him. The effect was not quite as dramatic, as her eyepatch was still on; so it was more like she narrowed her good eye at him. Oh, she wanted to hit him. To tear him apart--after he’d dared touch her wife, assaulted her husband and even touched their baby… “Now you have me. What now, Alenras? If you plan to kill me, can we at least make it a fair fight?”

“Always so direct, and so fierce. Even when we were children, as I recall. I dread what your daughter will be like--perhaps she’ll resemble her mother in demeanor more. We can hope.” Alenras said, smirking at her snarl in reply. “But, that is not why I’ve brought you here. I’ll dispense with the courting and frippery for your benefit.” He moved to stand in front of her, his stance solid and sure. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but recently--today, in fact--the blighted Banshee Queen has gone and done the unthinkable. I had thought that creating me was the extent of her depravity, but it seems she has yet to show her true colors to us.”

“And this has what to do with me?” Gavriyal asked, her tone flat as she moved to sit on the edge of the mattress he’d left her on. “We’ve all known the banshee has gone mad, betrayed every ally she made as well as the trust of the Horde. What’s she done now?”

Alenras’s expression changed. For a moment, Gav almost thought she could see a hint of the brother she’d known. As his features tightened and his true feelings were for a moment displayed so clearly, she could almost say she saw a ghost in him. “She has opened the way to the Shadowlands. An afterlife no mortal was meant to see.It’s how I had the power to breach their wards, to spirit you away as I did. It’s why all death knights are hearing the cacophony of tortured souls screaming and shrieking for rescue from the Banshee’s new master’s hold. She broke the damn sky… and now… I want to make her pay. For all she’s done to me. To us. To Azeroth.” 

This was strange to see. The most sincere, honest thing she’d heard from her brother’s lips since they were children so many years ago. Before the Apothecaries had twisted his mind and body into the monstrosity he had become. Some part of her almost wondered if this was a sign that there was something of her brother still remaining somewhere within him. But another bit of her mind was insistent that it was some sort of manipulation, a trick to make her sympathetic to him. “I think you’d have people telling you to get to the back of the line.” She said dryly. 

That seemed to amuse Alenras and his smirk returned. “That, my dearest baby sister, is where you come in. Or rather, we. You see, as much as a pain in the ass as you have been to me in the last few decades, I acknowledge that your skill with combat and hunting might rival my own. And... you are still alive. That would prove quite a valuable trait out ther. Between the two of us, I think we can jump the proverbial line.” His smirk became almost predatory, displaying his sharpened teeth. 

A sinking feeling began to make its home in Gav’s stomach. “...I have no love for Sylvanas. That much is true. She destroyed both Darkshore and Teldrassil... killed and tortured countless people. She deserves to suffer.” She said, moving to get to her feet and stand before her brother instead of simply cowering on a mattress. “But I don’t trust you.”

“Nor do I trust you, Gavriyal.” Alenras said, chuckling as he shrugged. “But, trust is not needed on a hunt, merely desired. The enemy of my enemy and all that. After we end her, we can go back to trying to kill or maim one another as we please.”

“I have to agree there. But something tells me that you could have sent any sort of message to me to convey this... you saw fit to kidnap me from my home and family. What am I here for?” Gavriyal asked, narrowing her eye at him again as she stood, regarding him with her arms crossed over her chest. She was tall, even for a kaldorei woman. Alenras too was somewhat taller than the average kaldorei man, both lean and well toned... nearly evenly matched before whatever perverse magic gave Alenras his strength and agility, and spells. 

That predatory smirk curved his lips again. “Well, the Banshee Queen has taken refuge in the lands of the dead. Not just the lands of the dead, but in the Maw--hell itself. You might be fierce and well trained, but you are still a mortal. You’ve seen the kind of power that opening that door has given me… and I refuse to let you hold me back, sister mine.”

Gav’s brows lifted and she tilted her head to the side slightly. “What do you mean?”

“I mean,” Alenras’s hands moved quickly, abruptly. Before she knew it, his fists had struck her head and chest--first stunning her and then knocking her back. The wind was beaten from her lungs and her vision had stars dancing over it. “I have no intention of dragging you into the Maw, unless I know you will be able to hold your own. Clearly, that is not the case yet.”

She groaned, her hand going to her head. The pain was not the worst she’d endured, but the dizziness and nausea that accompanied it was most unpleasant. Suddenly, she felt hands around her ankles, and became aware that Alenras was dragging her from the room. “What?” She said, trying and failing to find purchase on the smooth stone floor as he dragged her. 

“I am going to improve you, Gavriyal.” Alenras said as he dragged her through a barren corridor. There were no windows, only braziers lit with arcane light, and no obvious doors either--at least until Alenras approached a particular spot in the corridor. Another door formed and slid into the wall, silent as her cell’s entryway. The huntress was still dizzy and only half-conscious as her brother lifted her and laid her on a hard, cold surface. “Once you can match me, I will know that you are ready to join my hunt for the Banshee Queen. I think we will begin with your eyes,” Alenras added as he strapped her to the table, her arms held out spread eagle, as were her legs. “It won’t do to have a halved range of vision where we’re going.” He said as he removed her eyepatch. 

“What?” Gavriyal asked, her voice a little hoarse, still breathy from his blow to her chest. 

“Feel free to scream as much as you need to.” Alenras said flatly. Gav heard the snap as he applied gloves, not unlike those she’d seen alchemists wearing when brewing potions or concoctions. 

That pit in her stomach was growing and cold, electrified needles of fear were driving their way into her head as he began applying some sort of apparatus to keep her bad eye open. “Alenras--” She said, starting to try and struggle in the plentiful, heavy straps that were holding her motionless on the table. No fruitful motion was possible. She couldn’t see out of that eye, even as he locked its lid open with his mechanism. 

“That’s it, sister dear.” He said, snapping his fingers. A tray with what he revealed to be surgical tools upon it floated over from a nearby shelf. Another snap produced a very bright light, leaving no refuge for shadows in that room. “We have no neighbors, scream as much as you need to.” He said, selecting a scalpel and what looked to be some sort of debriding scoop. “We begin your improvement right…” Alenras  brought the scalpel down and into the socket of her fel-ruined eye--prying the useless organ from its seat. “Now.” He said. 

The only reply Gavriyal could give was a stifled scream of pain. Over and over again.

[cutesuki--bakugou]

Ancient Soul

Time Travel, Quirkless, Feudal Japan AU

“Your soul does not belong here.” Those were words you never thought that you would hear. Now, thrown into the past in feudal Japan, you must find a way to survive, all while struggling to avoid the growing feelings for one hot-headed war general. War, romance, death and love drive you forward, to find the place where your soul truly belongs.

Bakugou Katsuki x Fem!Reader

Want to start from be beginning? Check the Ancient Soul tag. New chapters released every Wednesday as long as schedule permits.

Genre: Romance / Angst Story Rating: Explicit | Adult Themes, Sex, Death, Depictions of Violence, Alcohol

Chapter 9: Soft On Him

Chapter Rating: Teen | Cursing Words:  2455

Bakugou’s entire section of his army, including Tsuyu, was gone for nearly a month and a half, leaving you to fret and worry over what you had told him. Although he said he would listen to you, there was never a true confirmation that he really did change his plan. All you could do was hope that he had, that they would come out of their battle as successful as the history books said. You spilled all your worries through the weeks to your little fish friend Sushi, who listened with a continuously gaping mouth and blank stare. The creature always stuck around right at the edge of the pond when you came to sit, making you curious as to if he truly did understand what you were doing there. He was just a simple Koi fish, completely white with not a speck of color anywhere on him. 

Although you knew your assigned guards were listening, you couldn’t help but verbally express your worries to the fish. Just getting it all out was enough to calm you, and often you talked through your problems with yourself to find solutions. It was nice, and you always thanked him for his time when you decided to return to your room or walk elsewhere. 

At the one month and two weeks mark, you had just finished your time in the garden, and you were casually walking when you heard it. The familiar voice of your guide, calling to you from behind. 

Turning to face her, you smiled at Tsuyu as she approached, still dressed in her war attire that you had first met her in. You assumed they had just returned, which was only confirmed by how tired she looked as she stopped before you. “Hello, Tsu! I’m so glad to see you made it back okay! How long have you been back?” 

“A while,” Tsuyu responded, working to untie one of the hard pieces of armor she had on her arm. “I guess you wouldn’t know from this far into the palace. Your company has been requested, however, so I’ve come to fetch you.” 

“Huh? Is everything okay?” You followed her as she began to walk in the direction she had originally come, her hair bouncing as she walked. 

“Everything is just fine, Miss. But I cannot discuss it, Bakugou wishes to in private.” 

If your stomach wasn’t in knots before, it certainly was now. In fact, you felt like your entire throat was near closing off. You were shocked that just mentioning being alone with him made you so nervous you considered taking off and hiding somewhere where they would have a very hard time finding you. It didn’t help that you were anxious about the results of the ambush, if it had gone how you predicted or if he even listened to you in the first place. 

Eventually, the two of you reached an area of the stables and fenced off area for the horses, and you spotted the subject of your anxiety almost instantly. Bakugou was standing out in some random spot in the fenced in section, watching his young palomino horse trot about. A bit confused, you looked down at Tsuyu. “Uhm, what is he doing?” 

“After a battle of any kind, when we return home, he often likes to be alone like this to clear his mind. This was also that mares first time out in a real battle, so I believe he’s watching her for any sign of unknown injury or distress.” 

“He… wants to talk to me out there? With a horse running around us?” 

“Yes.” Tsuyu looked at you like the request was the most common place thing to ever happen, so you decided not to make a fuss about it, even though it did seem a bit ridiculous. 

Approaching the fence, you looked down at her. “Do I just… go in-” 

You were interrupted as Tsuyu gave a whistle, gaining Bakugou’s attention. Without a word, he pointed to an area further down the fence, which upon inspection, was clearly a gate. Bidding Tsuyu goodbye for the moment, you entered the area through the gate, being sure to shut and secure it behind you. 

“Hurry up, Demon!” You heard Bakugou snap at you, making you quickly scurry over to him. Giving a bow, you waited for his approval before standing up straight, gazing up at him curiously. 

“You wanted to see me?” 

“You were right.” His words were quite snappy, though he spoke with an uncharacteristic softness. As his horse approached him, she eyed you with obvious reluctance, though seemed calmed when Bakugou gave her strong neck a few pats. “Your strategy or… prediction. It was right.” 

“So you won? Did anyone get badly hurt?” 

“We did win. But we lost many troops. No one you know by name.” Bakugou turned his gaze to the horse, giving a few soft clicks to calm her. You were unsure why, but his calm demeanor and gentle noises to the horse brought a heat to your cheeks. His praise only made it worse, and you didn’t really know what to expect from all this. 

“I’m glad,” you started, taking a half a step closer. “Did you tell Lord Yagi?” 

“I told him before we left what you had said. He did admit that there was no way you could have known anything about the enemies side of that ambush. And that your… input was of great value.” He looked back down at you again as you moved, and you caught his eyes wandering your form for just a moment. “He’s still skeptical, as expected. And in all honesty, so am I. I can’t tell if it’s luck that’s getting you by, or if you really are just that good of a liar. So, from now on, until I can tell a difference, you are going to meet with me to go over strategies before and after I present it. To see if you truly have a ‘power’ of some sort.” 

You gave a timid nod. “Yes, of course… But I may not be able to do it for… every battle. The more impact, the more I can see.” You had to make up a reasoning behind your inability to remember some of the smaller and insignificant skirmishes, and you hoped this would work. “Sometimes things don’t come to me. I cannot be held accountable for that.” 

“If you have no input on some things, then so be it. But I except your best attempts, Demon.” 

“I feel like I’ve proved how willing I am to cooperate and support you…” 

“You have. That is why I am easing up on your restrictions. And I’ll provide you with more entertainment resources so you aren’t so… bored, is what you had said?” The snarky smirk on his lips made your cheeks flush, though you quickly nodded. 

In truth, you were unsure exactly what to feel. You were happy that it had worked out, and yet you were still technically a prisoner, untrusted and constantly watched. Still, this would be an improvement, and perhaps even a chance to get closer to him. You weren’t sure why your heart fluttered so violently any time you laid eyes on him. It was like something inside you was hopelessly drawn to him, and for a moment, you wondered if he felt the same thing. In your mind, you pictured it like magnets, and one day you would surely collide if given the chance. 

“Thank you,” Pushing through the embarrassment, you smiled up at him, your heart nearly skipping a beat as his stern expression faltered for just a split second. “I don’t think I said that to you directly. I assume you got that from the reports of me talking to Sushi.” 

“The stupid fish? Yes.” Bakugou turned more to face the horse, as if looking at you frustrated him. “I’ve learned a lot about you from those reports. In particular, you seem to talk a lot about your family.” 

At the mention of such a sensitive subject, your emotions instantly flared, making your throat constrict and a burning rise up into your eyes. “Yes, I… I do.” It was impossible to control the wavering of your voice, turning your gaze down to look at his feet. “I think about them all the time and I wonder if… they are still thinking about me, too.” 

“I would allow you to send them a letter… if you so wished.” 

Feeling your chest tighten, you looked up at him in shock, very surprised to hear such a suggestion come out of his mouth. Seeming a bit bashful about it himself, he didn’t look down at you, though instead continued to pet his horse while he awaited your response. Sniffling, you quickly reached up and wiped the tears from your face, unable to resist the small smile that crossed your lips. 

“That’s… very kind of you. But there is no point in doing that. I feel like it may be better to just let them get over me than to give them any hope… Thank you, though. I think you’re much nicer than this persona you strut around with.” A sly smirk crossed your lips as the tips of his ears flushed, holding back giggles as he glared down at you. 

“Shut up,” Bakugou barked, returning to his previously mentioned persona. “You barely even know me! I was just offering as a payback for helping us!”

“Mhmm, sure, sure.” Smile never leaving your lips, you took a few steps closer to his horse, looking her over. “May I?” 

“Tch, do what you want.” Bakugou, even though he was obviously embarrassed, watched you closely as you softly placed a hand on the pale hair of the mares neck. With a gentle touch, you ran your hand along her strong body, walking with it until you were standing at her side. 

“She’s beautiful. She looks almost exactly like her mother.” You chanced a quick glance at him, glad to see his expression not falter at the mention of his fallen horse. “Except for that she has the black running up her back leg here.” 

Bakugou walked around the other side of the horse, running his hand along her back and displacing a bit of dust. “She’s filthy right now. But yes, she is a wonderful horse. Much like her mother.” 

“She did well out in battle?”

“Of course she did. She was bred from our two strongest war horses, my Taiyō and Yonaka. She’s still young, but Higure will be magnificent in time.” 

“Ooh, so that’s where that little splash of black comes from. How cute! She seems very fond of you.” Smiling up at him, you felt a heat return to your cheeks, finding the way he looked down at you to be so… soft. It was obvious to you that there was something on his mind besides the horse, but there was still something preventing him from speaking it. You wanted to ask, to confess that you felt this ridiculous connection to him and you wondered if he felt it, too. But you couldn’t. All you could do was take a step back as Bakugou gave a small pat to the horses’ rump to send her off, both of you watching as she trotted away towards the stables. 

With a sigh, Bakugou turned his gaze back down to you. “It is difficult for me to admit that my strategies were incorrect or ineffective. I’ve studied most of my life to perfect my skills, and yet… I still have times where I’m wrong and that angers me. This year in particular seems to be having it’s way with me. Despite my troubles, I’ve decided to trust you. I hope that won’t be another mistake.” 

Feeling your stomach bubble with anxiety, you shook your head, taking a few steps closer to him. “Don’t think that way. I will do everything I can to help you… Though it’s more than just wanting to preserve my life in any way. I… want to. I want to help you.” 

“Good. Enough of this.” He waved his hand at you in sudden annoyance, beginning to make his way towards the stables as well. “I will put Higure away and retire for the evening. Tomorrow we will both meet with Lord Yagi to discuss your prediction and the results of the ambush. I recommend you prepare yourself and sleep well.” 

Smiling, you watched him walk away. “Goodnight to you, too!” 

His only answer was a quick glance over his shoulder, before he vanished inside a building along with his horse. Your heart and spirits lifted from the pleasant conversation, you gave a soft sigh in adoration before heading out the way you came, finding Tsuyu dressed back in her more casual clothing at the entrance to the palace. She must have noticed the unconscious dreamy look on your face, as she gazed up at you curiously. 

“Are you okay, Miss?” 

“I’m just fine, Tsuyu. That went… much better than what I expected.” 

Smile crossing her lips, Tsuyu nodded, beginning to lead you back into the castle. “If I’m incorrect, than please let me know, but I think that you may be a little bit soft for him.” 

“W-what?” The heat that rushed to your face was more severe than anything you had experienced that day, quickly bringing your hands up to cover your face. “Tsu, please, that just isn’t true! He’s just-- I’m just--” 

“Shh, miss, it’s quite alright!” Tsuyu laughed, smiling up at you. “There is nothing to be upset about. Bakugou actually has a very hard time connecting with people, so I’m glad to see that you both get along decently well.” 

“Y-yeah…” Lowering your hands, you hugged yourself tightly, keeping your embarrassed gaze locked on the ground. “Even though he can be quite mean, I… like him. There’s more to him than what he wants to show.” 

“I think that having read my reports on you has helped him feel more comfortable around you. Otherwise, I don’t think it would be like this. But either way, I am glad!” 

Swallowing the lump that had groan in your throat, you nodded, the vision of his soft expression locked in your mind. So handsome, powerful, loyal and snarky. At this point, you knew you officially had a crush on the gruffy hotheaded man, and now that you were told you would be spending more time around him, you had a feeling it was only going to grow more intense. 

Only time would tell if that would be a positive experience. For now, all you could do is think of him, with imaginary pink hearts fluttering about your face.

[firefly-fez]

Fears and Friendship

Little drabble I wrote bc

- It’s a cute concept, but also a bad idea

- FRIENDSHIP FLUFF

- you don’t typically see the emotional effects / consequences of a paladin’s immunity to fear, so it’s fun to explore

Fears and Friendship

Vanora swiftly dismounted her steed, and knocked firmly on the door to Castle Sedgewick. She could feel the adrenaline of battle fading, the ache of her wounds becoming more noticeable as her heartbeat slowed to its normal rhythm. ...She probably should have waited for the rest of her party before coming all the way here, but whatever. They couldn’t be too far behind her.

The door stood shut. She knocked again. “It’s Vanora,” she called. “I have information for the royal family about…” she stopped herself before she finished her thought. She’d probably best not mention the plague, lest rumours grow. …”our investigations,” she finished, somewhat lamely.

The door swung open after a minute, and once she was inside, Ilse Albe revealed herself, making her person visible to the world once more. The princess had an alarmed expression on her face, but Vanora continued speaking the second the Princess became visible.

“It’s about the plague. We’ve determined - “

Isle cut her off. “What the hell happened to you?”

“Ah, you know. Injuries in combat. Life of an adventurer.” Vanora waved her hand dismissively. “Anyway, I have information...” she lowered her voice so that only Isle could hear her, though they were alone in the room. “...about the plague.”

Isle looked at Vanora with concern. She surveyed Vanora’s appearance - indeed, she looked like hell. She hadn’t taken the time to heal any of her “injuries in combat”, and - what looked like bite marks from... something huge pierced several sections of her armour, the metal was stained with her blood. Not to mention, she was covered head to toe in a slimy-looking substance that absolutely stank.

Vanora continued on, undeterred and oblivious to the Princess’ alarm. “This is critical information, Ilse. May I request an audience with the King to discuss the matter? He’ll want to know what we’ve uncovered.”

Ilse looked at Vanora, at a loss for words. “I - Vanora... “ She assumed an authoritative tone appropriate for a Princess, but her tone included a genuine concern for the Paladin’s wellbeing. “The King is in a meeting right now, and you look -” Ilse reeled back from the stench. “I’m sorry, but is that vomit? What happened to you?”

Vanora looked down at her ghastly appearance and shrugged. “Yeah, I was swallowed by a T-Rex. I - “

“WHAT?” Ilse’s alarm only grew. Her eyes widened in shock.

“Yeah, a T-Rex. Look, I know I’m not-”

“Does this T-Rex have anything to do with the plague?”

Vanora considered the idea seriously. “Well, that’s the question, isn’t it.” She rubbed her temples, and Ilse noticed chunks of T-Rex stomach goo in her hair.

Ilse was confused, but she didn’t think Vanora was in the right state of mind to properly settle the matter. “Look, why don’t you go home, heal yourself” - she gestured to Vanora’s bloodstained armour.

“Can’t. Out of lay on hands. This is-”

“Wait, already?” Ilse interjected.

“Mmhm. Whiston died, so. That used up a lot.”

Isle stared at Vanora, her alarm increasing with every word of the conversation.

“The T-rex killed Whiston?”

“No, no. Different combat. There was an evil demigod trying to kill Hoolie.”

“...Okay.” Ilse took a moment to gather her words.

Vanora really didn’t seem herself. The life of a Princess can get pretty lonely sometimes, as authority can tend to isolate yourself from the people you rule. Ilse didn’t have many friends, but Vanora was among the few - or at least, she liked to think they were friends, anyway. It’s hard to tell why people are nice to you when you’re a princess. It takes time to develop a knack for knowing whose friendship is genuine, and whose is politically motivated. She’d always liked Vanora, though. They were so radically different from each other - a peasant and a princess, a Paladin and a Vigilante, one denying fear, one relying on it. Still, Vanora’s convictions impressed Ilse - but today, Vanora did not seem like herself. Yes, there were the injuries and the stench of T-Rex stomach bile. But it was more than that. Vanora seemed rattled. Almost… if she didn’t know better, her instincts told her Vanora was afraid. Or at least, she had been afraid. She reminded Ilse of a child awoken from a nightmare - the rush, the dominance of fear gone, but  disoriented and a little shaken from the immensity of the experience.

Maybe it was Vanora’s uncharacteristic nature, maybe it was the fact that no one else was there to see, maybe it was the fact that Isle wanted to believe that they were friends, but she dropped the Princess tone to her voice, and asked this time in a gentle way.

“Vanora?”

“Mm?” Vanora lifted her head, removing her hands from rubbing her temples. She really did look exhausted. Right, she would be - she always was, after a resurrection.

‘Are you okay?”

Vanora’s expression softened a little. She seemed to regain a little of her focus. “Been a hell of a day.”

“...It’s 10:00 in the morning.”

“Really?” Vanora’s surprise seemed genuine.

“You… seriously. Please, go home. Get some rest. Take a bath, swing by the Greenhouse, get Davina to heal you, and we can hear your news of the plague tomorrow.”

Vanora didn’t like that suggestion at all. She grew almost frantic as she spoke “No, please, the sooner the better. I don’t know how much longer…” her voice trailed off.

“You going to be somewhere tomorrow?”

Vanora sighed heavily. “Not if I can help it.”

Isle had no idea what she meant by that, but she decided not to press the issue.

“Like I said, the King is in a meeting right now. You can see him in three hours, privately, but you better be cleaned up before then, okay?”

Vanora looked relieved. “Thank you.”

She turned to leave, but she stopped when her hand reached the door. Something about the day’s events clearly unsettled her.

“Hey, Ilse...”

“Yes?”

‘How do you do it?”

“...I’m not sure what you mean.”

“You said once, that I shouldn’t underestimate fear. That you use it as a strength. How do you do it?”

That was an odd question for a Paladin to ask of anyone. It was also an odd question for a peasant to ask of a Princess. It was not, however, an odd question for a friend to ask of a friend. She hoped this was a sign Vanora was looking for advice from a friend. God knows, Ilse could use a friend to vent to from time to time. Of all the privileges Princesses get to indulge in, that isn’t typically one of them.

“Why do you ask? It’s… not something I’d expect you to need to know. You’re immune to fear.”

“Not today, I wasn’t.”

Hm. So an antipaladin was involved, Ilse thought. Interesting.

“...when was the last time you felt fear?”

“Not as long ago as you’d think. The Day of the Dog attack - around the time we first met, when the antipaladin attacked Dragonslayer Drum.”

That wasn’t long ago at all, really. Not in terms of a Paladin’s stint between fears, anyway. But Vanora was younger than most Paladins. She hadn’t been one long enough to have forgotten what fear felt like - she’d said so herself. This wasn’t about being unused to fear, then. This was something else.

‘And the time before that?”

“The plague.”

Ilse took a moment for the significance of that comment to sink in. She knew Vanora’s mother had died, she knew she’d recently resurrected a brother, but… right. It was the plague that took Vanora’s family away from her. It was the plague that made her a Paladin.

“Did you want to give it up?”

She sighed again. ‘I suppose I did. Fear… it’s very powerful, like you say. I remember a time when it could be a positive thing - keeps you alert, gets you out of danger faster… but - it didn’t stay a good thing. It’s… kind of like riding a horse, I think. If you’re not the one in control, it becomes dangerous very quickly. After the plague… I wasn’t the one in control anymore. Maybe even before that point. I don’t know.” She looked up. “Does that make any sense to you?”

“Yeah. Yeah, it does.”

“You’re the one in control, the way you...interact, with fear. I was never any good at that. You can use fear to your advantage, but my relationship with it was… increasingly self-destructive. I didn’t become a Paladin for the sake of getting rid of it, or anything, but I certainly didn’t miss it when it was gone. Well, not for a while, anyway. It’s not as easy without fear as I thought it would be, though.”

“How do you mean?”

“Well… fear is powerful, but that makes it...distracting, sometimes. Maybe distracting isn’t the right word. But it - it pulls your focus in a specific direction. Like; say you find a dead body”, she proposed the scenario like it was a common occurrence. Maybe to her, it was. “When you see it, it’s normal to be afraid. You’re confronted with your own mortality, and it scares you. The fear is there, in the back of your mind.” She really did sound like she’d actually been in such a circumstance herself. Not uncommon for an adventurer...but if that’s the case, she shouldn’t know about the fear of it. Ilse wondered if she’d been present when her mother or brother died. “But there are other things you feel, too. Grief. Despair - the injustice of what happened to them, especially if they were someone innocent - someone young.” Hopelessness. If you feel fear as well, it has a tendency to pull your focus. When that veil is removed...it’s not as comfortable as it sounds.”

Ilse had never thought of it like that before. She was glad that Vanora’s demeanor seemed to be improving as she got this stuff off her chest, though.

“Advantages and disadvantages of fear aside, I was never any good at keeping fear in check. I used to manage it alright - but it was… it was just so constant. It takes strength and - well. No one can be strong forever.”

The gravity of Vanora’s life experiences hit Ilse hard. It would have been constant - not knowing when you’d eat again. Not knowing whether you’d last the night, shivering in the cold. No doctor to go to when you’re sick, never knowing how you were going to make it through the day - going minute by minute, hour by hour, challenge by challenge. Then facing something as terrifying as the plague. She really did try to understand the impact that could have on a person - a princess should know the plight of her people, after all, but here it was; before her eyes. Someone who, for years at a time, fought fear with no reprieve. No wonder Vanora had chosen to give it up.

‘I… I don’t really know what to say.” She wanted to have some good advice here, but she was a little lost for words.

Vanora seemed to realise she’d just blurted out her vulnerabilities to the Princess. Ilse recognised the “oh crap, you’re a princess. Why am I telling you this?” Look. It was a lonely look. “I’m sorry. Rough day. I… I should take your advice. I’ll…”

“It was the other way around, for me. I guess… fear was always in shorter supply than safety. I used to think to myself, “One day, this will be a bad memory”, and that helped me to believe I’ll get through it. That’s how I fought it when I was younger, anyway. These days… I think of why I can’t give up. All the things that helped me to feel safe, when I was a kid... they’re all the things I’m fighting for, now, really. A good life. A happy life. For everyone in the Kingdom. I have to be brave - for them.”

“You have to be brave for your community.”

Ilse laughed. “That’s a very Erastillian way to put it, but yes. Vanora, if you think of the people you took your oath for - they are why you can’t give in. I know…” an expression Vanora couldn’t quite place crossed Ilse’s face - “I know safety was never a big part of your childhood, but - everything you love about your community, your home - that’s why you can’t give in to fear. You’ve overcome a lot for the sake of serving them already.” She smiled. “You can overcome fear too.”

Vanora smiled back, warmly. She looked more herself now, though she still stank of T-Rex. “Thank you, my friend. You have given me some good advice - advice I should take.” She seemed to acknowledge the stink of the T-Rex vomit for the first time. She wrinkled her nose. “Ugh. I should get myself cleaned up. I’ll be back in three hours to talk to the king.”

Ilse was glad she helped her friend, and in her heart she was happy to have heard Vanora use the word ‘friend’.

Vanora looked back one last time.

“Thank you”, she said again, in a sincere tone. She left the castle. Ilse closed the door shut behind her, hearing the cries of the party who had caught up with Vanora.

Davina was there, berating Vanora for running off before she could get healing. “Tell me you didn’t speak to the King like that.” Ixia said, horrified. Ilse laughed. They sounded happy, teasing each other with their usual banter, which disguised a lot of the difficulties they encountered throughout their day.

Ilse couldn’t help but feel ever so slightly jealous. She couldn’t josh around easily with peers and friends like that.

Of all the privileges princesses get, that is not one of them.

Still, Vanora had called her friend. She seemed to realise that her need to seek advice from someone was welcome, despite her tendency towards formal diplomacy.

Maybe one day, she’d have more regular company. She’d never had a friend confide in her before. A Paladin, too. Paladins are typically the ones people confide in.

That was progress.

[theclintbartonbraindump]

Clint Barton x Reader - N(ice) Doggies Ch. 1

Pairing - Clint Barton (Hawkeye) x Reader (that’s you)

Word count - 1772

Warnings - Language I guess, but what did you expect.

This is my first fic that I am actually posting! There will be at least one more chapter, possibly two depending on where it goes and how wordy I get. Just something nice and fluffy. Please feel free to leave comments and suggestions, I’m always looking to improve! Enjoy!

__________

“Did you see that?” The words came from Clint’s mouth as a stuttered hiss as another gust of icy wind whipped around him. The small valley the two of you had chosen to settle down in for the night was offering about as much protection from the Russian winter as a wet blanket. Even with the tent blocking you from the majority of the wind you could still feel wave after wave of what felt like liquid ice traveling under your chin and down the front of your coat. That whole experience was nothing short of miserable.

You and Clint had been told this was the tamest January this part of Siberia had seen in over a decade. “Thank God for that global warming,” the hotel manager had quipped, earning a look from you that was so cold it probably would’ve seen the global crisis reversed. If this was mother nature’s idea of tame you hated to think what she might throw at you if you ever showed up at her door unannounced, interrupting her favorite soap opera.

You shivered aimlessly as the hand Clint had been using to gesture towards whatever he’d apparently seen quickly retreated back to his coat pocket. Despite the violent protest from your neck, which had grown painfully stiff from the cold and your hopeless shivering, you lifted your gaze to match his own. You knew it was probably nothing, just shapes in the snow as is swirled through the trees, but you also knew that he’d keep pestering you about it if you didn’t make some attempt to ease his paranoia. As you suspected your eye met nothing but the endless sea of conifers, painted white by the blasting snow. You tried looking beyond the tree line, hoping to give Clint the benefit of the doubt that he wasn’t just seeing things, but again there was nothing. You saw only the same thing you’d seen for the past three days, trees and snow. The most interesting thing you’d seen on your little Russian excursion was an owl, landing talons first on an unsuspecting field mouse. You looked back to Clint with sarcastic concern.

“I wasn’t aware that hypothermia also caused hallucinations. Or is that the sleep deprivation acting up again. I told you I could take a longer watch.”

“And I told you I am fine, I don’t need more sleep, Mom!” The emphasis he threw onto the last word made you smile as you turned back to the small fire that was now in serious danger of being blown out. It had taken the two of you nearly two hours and Clint using his body as a shield to finally get it lit. If it died now you were certain you would resign yourself to the same fate without a second thought. Damn wind! Weren’t the trees supposed to protect you from this shit?

Clint ignored your amusement at his outburst and turned his gaze towards some distant point beyond the tree. He lingered there quietly for a few more moments before continuing in his defense.

“And I’m not crazy. I definitely saw something.”

“Well Hawkeye, I’ll just have to take your word for it, I guess. You are the eyes of this duo after all.”

You didn’t even have to look up to know that a mischievous smirk had crawled its way onto his lips.

“Oh yeah, what does that make you?”

You didn’t miss a beat.

“Mom, apparently.”

Clint playfully swat at your arm, earning himself a feigned look of anguish to which he just smirked.

“I guess somebody’s gotta keep an eye on me.” He mused.

“If Natasha gave up I don’t know how SHIELD expects me to do any better.” The Russian assassin, and your personal friend, you were more than a little proud to say, had turned the walking catastrophe that was Clint Barton over to you for a couple of missions while she was “on vacation”. Knowing full well that Natasha would sooner be dead than take any well-deserved time off, you guessed that this was just her way of telling you that she was off on an extended solo mission that required her full attention. i.e. she didn’t have time to babysit the strangely easily distracted archer. Clint was the best marksman in the world, there was no doubting that, but his lack of any real formal training showed in some unusual ways. Most recently you’d noticed that it reared its head in Clint’s inability to focus on any one thing for more than exactly seven minutes. Why seven, you had no idea, but you’d clocked it more than once and each time at the seven-minute mark he’d be turning to you with some random thought, usually pertaining to food. The man really just needed someone to keep him on target, literally.

“What makes you say that? I think you’re doing a great job.”

While you wanted to be surprised that Clint hadn’t even pretended to be offended by your previous comment, you couldn’t manage it, because there it was again. You felt it every time he gave you that lopsided smile. It was like he knew the power it had over you. Like he knew it would always make you forget whatever scold or self-deprecating remark you had been planning to make. It’s like he knew just how to make your heart feel lite but turn your knees to lead at the same time. You’d known each other for years but had only really been able to get the chance to know the real Clint Barton over the past few weeks and he was still a mystery to you. You were now more confused about the archer than you had ever been and you didn’t know if his remarks were meant as mischief or if he truly meant it all to be endearing. Clint’s sense of humor, or rather his personality to be honest, always made it difficult to discern the sincere from the sarcasm.

You lowered your head a bit further to hide the blush that was forcing its way to your cheeks. True it would’ve been hidden under layers of rosy, snow-blasted skin, but you couldn’t take the chance. You smiled and went back to poking hopelessly at the fire before finally giving up. In its unattended state, the flames began to wither and eventually choked out of existence. Neither of you made a move to save it so as the fire finally flickered out the cold began to seep its way back into your bones. Not only that, but you were now very aware that night had fallen. Without the fire and with little to no moonlight reaching through the dense canopy of pine trees, you and Clint found yourselves enveloped in the near pitch black.

“Could be worse.” Clint piped up as he shifted closer to you.

“Really? Even with Bigfoot out there creeping on up.”

“I’m serious!”

“How Clint? How does this get worse? I’m sitting here freezing my ass off in the middle of bumblefuck nowhere Russia for absolutely no reason at all.”

Ok, maybe not no reason. You had been sent out here for a pretty legitimate reason actually. Something about Hydra recruiting in the area in the hopes of setting up a base. But days worth of trudging through the snow surrounding your coordinates had only proved what you’d guessed after about the eighth hour of your search. This was all a wild goose chase. Clint had radioed in to report as much only to be met with the news that you’d be forced to stay in the wilderness for at least another 24 hours due to inclement weather. Only once the storm cleared would you be evacuated. That was 36 hours ago, and the snow was showing no signs of relenting. To make matters worse your food stores were running low. You either needed to be rescued or to find the town you had started out in soon or they’d be adding you to the town folklore about people who never came out of these woods.

“There could be wolves.” You stared at him. Jesus Christ why was he like this?

“Wolves?”

“Yeah, you know, wolves. Like doggies only bigger and hungrier.” Why did he look so proud of himself?

“I know what they are, dingus.” You threw and ill-conceived snowball at him in retaliation for the lame joke that still had you chuckling despite yourself. Clint attempted to get his revenge by tackling you, only to be met with an armful of the snow you’d just been sitting in. You looked down at him amused from where you were now standing before gazing out once again past the trees. “You better not jinx us. There’s no way you and I are fighting off monster dogs in our sorry state.”

“Aw c’mon, don’t worry. If there was a pack in the area they would’ve found us by now.” He sounded so nonchalant as he picked himself up and brushed the snow from his pants and jacket. Like he hadn’t just been cracking jokes about one of the many creatures in the region that could and would definitely tear you to shreds. “Come on, let’s get inside. No use staying out here in Jack Frost’s asshole.”

“You go ahead. I’ll keep watch for a while.” You started to take your place back on the ground when Clint caught your arm.

“Of what? The pinecones? Look the fire’s blown out and there’s nothing to see out here, sweetheart. At this point, if there is anything out there you’ll hear it before you see it. Storm’s picking back up. Even I can’t see more than 10 feet ahead out here. Best to just stay in and wait it out.”

His words were all but lost on you after the utterance of the new nickname. Clint had a rep for be a pretentious flirt and you were definitely no stranger to that side of him. You’d been subject to his bad pick-up lines on so many occasions you had started keeping a tally. None of it ever really got to you, or so you had convinced yourself, but there was something in it this time that made you stop and do a mental double-take. Maybe you were overthinking this. You were definitely overthinking this. But then again, he looked more sincere than playful. You shook yourself out of your mild shock when you realized that Clint had been staring at you expectantly. You decided to blame his sudden change in demeanor on the shit circumstances you found yourselves in as you knelt down to climb into the tent.