#it will go through some rounds of editing but all the chapters are down and their sequence of events should be solid!

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

i just caught up with my comments over on ao3 and this literally me right now

[gailynovelry]

Breathing Gods is DONE.

[moonchild9350]

Perfect Copy

summary: Hyunjin brings home a clone of himself, one to take over his daily life at work and home when he's gone for the tour. Everything seems to be great....that is until it's not.

pairing: idol!Hyunjin x fab!reader x clone!Hyunjin

genre: established relationship, sci fi au, angst, fluff, smut-18+ MDNI

word count: 9k

warnings: fingering, oral sex (f receiving), unprotected sex (don't), creampie, squirting, multiple rounds and other things I don’t want to spoil!

notes: this fic is one of my favorites that i wrote! I'm thinking of making it an anthology series with three chapters per se. Let me know if you'd like to see it as so! And as always let me know what you think of this fic!

If you enjoyed, please comment, like, and reblog ♡

Divider by @saradika-graphics

Please do not copy, translate, edit, report, or use this work without my permission. ©moonchild9350 (2024)

Masterlist | Perfect Love

You were pacing the floor of your room, your hands behind your back as your mind raced. The phrase “what should I do,” repeated over and over, so much so it was all you could hear.

The house was empty, the silence loud and clear as your feet touched the padded floor. The sun was shining through your window, the sound of a dog barking in the distance and children playing at the park across the street. The atmosphere outside was completely different from the one inside.

Not too long ago, you got off the phone with Hyunjin, your boyfriend, after he shared some disturbing information that would change the dynamic of the household forever…or at least the foreseeable future. He was bringing his clone home to join the household at the company’s request.

You were too stunned to speak as he explained each band member was required to have one, the company going as far as to add an addendum into their contracts stating so.

When you asked why, Hyunjin just explained that the clone would be here when he’s gone on tour, ready to continue operations at the company as scheduled, saving time and money for the company.

What could you do?

The decision was already made and Hyunjin and his clone were on their way here, to the home you both shared.

It’s not like you’ve never heard of an idol having a clone to help out with their career, matter of fact it was more common than people thought. The appeal was there, as a clone would be able to attend events and carry on with the idol’s daily life as if it were nothing, allowing the idol to simultaneously complete other tasks that were needed of them.

The world had mixed reactions about the idea, some in favor of the thought, allowing idols to not be overworked, while others found the idea not so appealing. You yourself was somewhere in the middle, understanding why an idol would want the extra help as you were dating one yourself but also found the idea of a clone of Hyunjin walking around eerie.

You continued to pace the floor, back and forth, back and forth, until you heard the door open and close. You could hear Hyunjin speaking with someone, his voice carrying through the small apartment.

Taking a breath, you braced yourself and walked into the hallway, coming face to face with Hyunjin and well…Hyunjin.

“Hey babe!” Hyunjin said, coming up to you and pressing a kiss to your cheek.

You shuffled behind Hyunjin a little as he turned to face his clone. “Well here he is! Or I guess here I am?” He said with a chuckle.

The clone raised his hand as if to say hi before placing it at his side again, his eyes fixed right on you. You lowered your gaze not sure where to look as he continued to stare at you.

“Well let’s all go sit down and chat,” Hyunjin said, breaking the awkward silence that briefly filled the room.

You followed him to the couch, sitting down next to him as his clone took the seat opposite both of you. The clone sat up straight in his seat, his hands placed delicately in his lap as he waited for Hyunjin to speak.

You took a moment to take the new member of the household in, observing his looks to see if he resembles Hyunjin at all and you must admit, he could pass off as your boyfriend. His hair was long and brown, sitting perfectly at his shoulders, his eyes a beautiful chocolate brown. He even had the little freckle underneath his left eye, the pretty beauty mark very much present and distinctive.

The only difference was his unblemished skin, new and perfect just like a brand new baby. His movements were stiff and uncertain, as if they hadn’t been used in a while, which they probably hadn’t.

Hyunjin’s clone looked around, his eyes drifting across the living room, taking in his new surroundings. You were so caught up in observing the clone that you were startled as Hyunjin clapped his hands next to you.

“Well welcome me! Thats weird to say,” Hyunjin chuckled as he slapped his thigh.

You and the clone just stared at him, unsure of what to say or do.

Hyunjin coughed before settling back in his seat, feeling the awkward tension in the room.

“Okay…tough crowd. My clone will be living here from now on. He’ll be in and out of the house to go to the company and fill in for me while I’m gone, and he’ll be here for you if you need anything.”

Hyunjin’s clone then smiled, his dimples showing just like on your Hyunjin. His smile, his mannerisms was so much like your boyfriend’s it was unnerving. It was becoming too much for you.

“I’m sorry, I need a moment,” you mumbled as you got up, retreating to the safety of your bedroom.

You went and sat on the bed, your head down in your hands as Hyunjin walked in.

“Baby?” Hyunjin asked as he came to kneel in front of you. He gently began rubbing your legs attempting to soothe you.

You looked up and say the concern in your boyfriend’s face. Softening your features you said, “I’m just….overwhelmed. He’s just like you, it’s eerie.”

Hyunjin nodded agreeing with you. It was eerie, he’s not going to lie. It was a weird feeling seeing himself standing there. He needed you to be okay though and comfortable with the clone while he’s away.

“It’s okay, I just have to get used to him being here is all,” you continued attempting to smile.

“Okay baby, you’ll tell me if you change your mind?” Hyunjin asked as he held your gaze.

You shook your head yes and placed your hands on top of his. Hyunjin smiled and got up, leaning over to press a kiss to your lips. You sighed as his plush lips melted with yours, as he brushed a strand of your hair behind your ear.

All too soon, Hyunjin pulled back and grinned. “Let’s go back yeah?”

You nodded and stood up, reaching out to take Hyunjin’s hand in yours. He interlaced his fingers with yours, the softness and warm feeling causing you to feel at ease and led the way back to the living room. The clone was sitting in the same spot still, his head turning toward you both as you entered the room. His eyes drifted to your intertwined hands for a moment before looking back up, his cheeks reddening.

Hyunjin dropped your hand and sat down, turning the tv on in the process. You didn’t know what to do as you rocked back and forth on your feet, your eyes darting anywhere but on Hyunjin’s clone.

“I’ll just…go to the kitchen,” you mumbled as you turned on your heels, making your way to the kitchen.

Once in the kitchen, you looked around wondering what to do next. You took a look at the clock and noticed it was almost dinner time. 'Might as well cook dinner,’ you thought as you grabbed the ingredients you needed to make lasagna.

You could hear the voices from the tv and Hyunjin and his clone discussing something, but the sound of pots and pans clanging together overpowered them both. It was easy to fall into the safe and familiar routine of making the sauce, placing the noodles down followed by more sauce and cheese.

Carefully, you created a dish worth devouring, smiling as you added the finishing touches before sliding it into the oven. You then went about chopping up lettuce and other veggies, deciding to make a salad for the side.

You were tossing the vegetables together when a pair of arms wrapped around your waist. With a yelp, you dropped the tongs you were holding before spinning around to see who it was.

“Easy baby!” Hyunjin said as he held you close, a mixture of concern and pure amusement on his face.

“You scared me!” You exclaimed as you clutched your chest with one hand and lightly slapped his arm with the other.

“I’m sorry,” he pouted, giving you the sweetest puppy dog eyes. “Kiss?”

You sighed and smiled while pressing your lips to his. Hyunjin pulled you closer, his hands drifting down your sides to rest on your ass. He deepened the kiss, shoving his tongue in your mouth to tangle with yours. You let out a moan deep within your throat as he rutted his semi-hardened bulge into your core, his length pressed against you nicely, as a little reminder of what you do to him.

Hyunjin then nipped at your lips and leaned back and gazed at you, taking in your flushed cheeks and swollen lips.

“We’ll finish this later mm?” Hyunjin said before turning around and walking away.

You stood there stunned, your mind trying to catch up to what you were doing before. The smell of something burning caught your attention and you quickly grabbed an oven mitt to pull the lasagna out to cool. You hurried to set the table, placing the food in the center and called the boys to come eat.

Dinner was a strange affair as you were sitting across from the clone. You stole hurried glances at him while he scarfed down his food, not caring if it was hot enough to burn his tongue. Once he cleaned his plate, he sat back and smiled, seeming completely satiated.

“That was amazing y/n,” the clone said, pushing his plate away.

“Uhh, thanks,” you murmured as you pushed your food around, as you were starting to feel full.

“She’s a great cook huh?” Hyunjin bragged with a cocky grin. “That’s my girl.”

You chuckled and playfully hit Hyunjin on the shoulder, rolling your eyes as he dramatically clutched his arm. As you were teasing him for his theatrics, you missed how the clone eyed you, watching your every move and how you interacted with the real Hyunjin.

“Oh!” Hyunjin exclaimed, recovering from the show he was putting on, “What do we call you while I’m here? Might be a little confusing if we just say Hyunjin.”

All three of you were silent for a moment as you racked your brains for a nickname to call the clone to avoid confusion within the house. After a moment more, an idea popped into your head.

“What about Jinnie?” You suggested, looking from the clone to Hyunjin.

The clone looked at you for a moment as if he was pondering your choice, his facial expression unreadable. Hyunjin was silent as he waited for the clone’s response.

“I love it!” The clone responded, a wide grin spreading on his perfect face.

“Perfect! We’ll call you Jinnie then,” Hyunjin said while grasping your hand in his to give it a squeeze.

The rest of the evening passed without event, all three of you spending it in front of the tv, watching a movie that Hyunjin had heard was really good from Felix. As the movie went on, you began to feel tired, your eyes drooping and body feeling heavy as you leaned onto Hyunjin. You closed your eyes briefly, telling yourself you’d just take a little cat nap while the ending played on the screen.

However, you were jolted awake by Hyunjin, who was gently shaking your shoulder and calling your name. You quickly sat up, shocked you had actually fallen asleep.

“Let’s go sleepy head,” Hyunjin teased as he pulled you up from the couch. “I already showed Jinnie his room.”

You nodded and followed your boyfriend, slipping into your shared bedroom to get ready for bed. As you got ready for bed, going through the motions of getting into your sleep shirt, brushing your teeth and doing your skin care, Hyunjin prepped the bed pushing your stuffies aside and making sure all of your blankets were at the ready.

Hyunjin slid into bed, patting the space next to him. You giggled and padded over, snuggling under the blankets with your boyfriend. He pulled you close and pressed sloppy kisses to your face, causing you to giggle.

The kisses increased until his lips slotted with yours, soft and sweet, until he pressed his hard on into your thigh and bit your lip between his teeth.

“Need you love,” he whispered in between kisses.

His hands slide down your side, tracing the curves of your hips until he cupped your sex. You let out a soft moan as he slid a finger through your panties, pushing it between your folds soaking the fabric.

“Let me hear you love,” he cooed as he stared at your face, taking in how he was making you feel.

Hyunjin slid your panties to the side and pressed his finger directly against your clit before swirling fast but precise circles against the puffy bud. You whimpered against his lips as shocks of pleasure traveled through your core, your hips moving in time with his movements.

“That’s it love, eyes on me,” he said as his fingers sneaked down to your hole and sliding in within your warmth.

He curled his fingers up and rubbed the little gummy spot that makes your toes curl, your fingers digging into his biceps as he fucked you. You kept your eyes on his, feeling your high build up within you with each passing second.

Hyunjin could tell you were going to come, as he fucked you with his fingers, the palm of his hand giving your clit extra stimulation. His cock twitched within his sweats as you panted and moaned, whimpering his name over and over.

“Hyunjin, fuck! Gonna come!” You squealed as you felt the muscles tighten in your core before letting go, the walls contracting around his fingers as you let out a moan.

“Yes, that’s it love. Such a good girl coming on my fingers,” Hyunjin praised, smirking at the squeal you let out.

He withdrew his fingers and hurriedly pushed his sweats down, his cock finally free and dripping with precum. Hyunjin bunched your shirt up, exposing your lower half to him and spread your legs wider so he could fit more easily between them.

You watched him with a hooded gaze as he lazily stroked his cock, spreading the precum around his length.

“Ready for my cock love?” Hyunjin asked as he teased your clit with his tip, waiting for your response.

“Give me your cock baby,” you begged.

“Fuck!” Hyunjin groaned as he pushed in, his cock sliding in with ease with how wet you were.

He immediately set a fast pace, focused on getting you both to your highs. He was a sight to see above you, his eyes set in a fucked out expression as he bit his plush lips over and over. Beads of sweat pooled on his temple, the droplets making their way onto your belly as they fell away.

You let out a loud moan, so loud that you’re sure Jinnie heard in the guest room. You couldn’t bring yourself to care however, as you focused on how your lovers cock felt deep within you, fucking you just how you like it, until your orgasm built once more, threatening to spill over at any moment. -- -- Jinnie was on his way back to his room after washing up when he heard your moans, high pitched and shrill and mixed with deeper, lower ones. He stopped in front of the door to your bedroom which was slightly cracked allowing him to hear and see the activities that were occurring more easily.

He should walk away and ignore you both, but how could he when you sounded so sweet. Jinnie felt his cock swell in his pants, the tent becoming very noticeable. Ignoring the discomfort he felt down below, he focused his eye on the crack of the door and watched. Watched as his double fucked you within an inch of your life. Listened as you moaned and screamed Hyunjin’s name…his name.

He could see your face, how your eyes rolled to the back of your head, your tongue lolling out as you withered around in pleasure. He could see your toes curl as your legs wrapped around Hyunjin’s waist pulling him closer and deeper. He could hear your wet pussy, the squelches it made as Hyunjin’s cock speared you open.

Jinnie was in awe of you. He found himself wanting to be the one fucking you, causing you to orgasm over and over underneath him. He wanted to be the one to hold you tight at night as you slumbered. He wanted to be the one that loves you.

As you came with a loud yell, he decided he would have you, so you could call him yours and vice versa.

As the weeks passed, all three of you settled into your new routines. Hyunjin and Jinnie would go off to the studio, their schedules busy with rehearsals and recordings for the new album and tour. You stayed home most days, working on your sketches for the fashion show that was coming up as you were a fashion designer. Occasionally you would go into the office for meetings.

The boys usually got home exhausted but energetic, yapping about their day nonstop. You watched in amazement as both of them animatedly reenacted some scene Minho and Jisung had recreated. You couldn’t help but think that they were so similar, the way their brains processed what to say or do next, to the way they moved, almost as if they were in sync.

“And scene!” Hyunjin shouted as he took a bow while Jinnie clapped in delight.

“I have no clue what just happened,” you teased, shaking your head in disbelief.

“What?!” Hyunjin whined, a pout forming on his face.

“We were reenacting the scene from that new action movie that just came out. Minho and Jisung were adamant that we learn the moves and lines,” Jinnie explained with an apologetic look on his face.

“Ah makes sense,” you chuckled.

Hyunjin collapsed on the floor and grabbed his water bottle to take a swig. You sat next to Jinnie, feeling slightly more comfortable with him, but still a little on edge. Hyunjin would be leaving soon to embark on the group’s five month long tour, leaving you here with Jinnie. Anytime he mentioned how close the date was, you would freak out, voicing your concerns at being alone with practically a stranger.

However, Hyunjin would dismiss your concerns saying Jinnie isn’t a stranger, it’s basically him. He’d always reassure you that if he didn’t need the clone, he would not have it. Simple as that. But the company wanted the members to use the clones so they can progress in their careers, so there was nothing he could really do.

You understood, knowing his hands were tied, so you put up with Jinnie and tried to get not let his similarities to Hyunjin get to you.

“Should we have one last game night before I have to leave?” Hyunjin suggested. “We can order take out and everything.”

You and Jinnie both agreed and began picking out a game while Hyunjin ordered the food. It wasn’t long before you three were settled on the floor, board game set up with food all around you. The night passed with friendly banter, making you feel even more at ease with the clone.

“Don’t forget my favorite sweatshirts!” Hyunjin called out to you from the bathroom as you rummaged through the drawers.

You were helping Hyunjin pack as he was leaving for the tour the next day. You spotted the sweatshirts he mentioned and groaned, realizing that his favorite sweatshirts were also your favorites and that you wouldn’t have anything to wear for comfort while he was gone.

“Can you leave one here with me please? I need to have something of yours while you’re gone.”

Hyunjin poked his head from the bathroom. “I suppose. Pick whichever one you want.”

You smiled and began to shift through the fabric, deciding on his black hoodie. You gathered the others and carefully folded them before placing them in his suitcase. You gathered his shirts, pants, socks, and boxers, ensuring he had everything he would need while gone. Satisfied with your work you announced to your boyfriend that you were done packing.

Hyunjin came out of the bathroom, carrying his toiletries with a smile. “Thanks love.”

“Of course, anything for my lover,” you cooed. “You have everything you need.”

“Everything?” Hyunjin asked as he set down his bag in the suitcase.

You cocked your head at him, wandering what he was talking about. You slowly backed away as he stalked toward you, a smirk on his face. As your back hit the wall, Hyunjin approached you.

“I won’t have you,” he murmured as he cupped your chin.

You held your breath as he gently pressed his lips to yours, savoring the slow moment. You were going to miss this, miss him. As you clutched onto his shirt, Hyunjin deepened the kiss as he pressed his body closer to yours until there was barely any space left between you two.

You let out a whimper as he disconnected from you, his eyes on your swollen, red lips.

“Can I have my girl tonight?” He softly said, his arms wrapping around your waist to hold you close.

You nodded your head as you gazed into his eyes, your pussy clenching over nothing at the implications of his words. Hyunjin smiled and then guided you to the bed. He helped you get comfortable before peeling off your clothes, layer by layer until you lay bare for him.

Parting your legs, Hyunjin settled between them, his eyes on your wet pussy. “Let me take care of you baby,” Hyunjin cooed as he leaned down to get comfortable.

He licked up your folds collecting your slick that was there coating your skin. You let out a low moan as he repeated the action again and again until he dived in, his lips wrapping around your clit in earnest. He began to suck gently, rolling your bundle of nerves on his tongue every now and then, causing you to mewl out.

You gripped his hair, holding him to your pussy as he ate you out, his tongue lapping at clit before pushing into your hole to lick at your walls. You couldn’t help but buck your hips into his mouth as he moaned, the vibrations traveling into your core. You watched your lover as he licked and sucked before leaning back, resting his head on your thigh as he placed lazy kisses on the flesh.

Minutes turned to hours as he edged you, playing with your pussy just the way he likes until you were whimpering and begging for him to let you cum. As he looked up at you during a break, he gently stroked your outer thigh, gazing at you with love in his eyes.

“My sweet girl ready to cum?” He asked, his eyebrows raising as he waited for your answer.

“Yes, yes, please let me cum,” you whined.

Hyunjin smirked before turning back to your pussy, eyeing the flesh. You were soaked, your slick coating every inch of your pussy, your thighs, and the sheets below. He parted your folds carefully, exposing your engorged clit. God he loved when he had you like this, needy and begging, your pussy waiting to be devoured so you could come on his face.

He wasted no time wrapping his mouth around your clit, this time sucking hard and fast. You were a mess as pleasure spread throughout your core. Hyunjin searched for your hands and once he found them he interlaced his fingers with yours as he continued to suckle your clit.

You squeezed his hands as you rocked your hips, riding his face as your high built up within. You whispered a litany of Hyunjin’s name, pleading for him not to stop with Hyunjin humming at your demands, as he pressed his face further into your folds.

With a particular suck and roll of your clit against his tongue, your orgasm hit hard and you let out a loud moan as Hyunjin continued to suck to help you ride out your high. Once satisfied, he leaned back and licked his lips, his eyes rolling to the back of his head at your taste. He took you in as you breathed heavy and laid in the mess you made, completely fucked out.

You were in and out of sleep as Hyunjin carefully cleaned you up before he cuddled next to you holding you tight in his arms. You felt at ease as you snuggled in closer to him, listening to the sound of his heart beat. And as you drifted off to sleep, you dreamed that he didn’t have to go on his tour, that he would stay here with you. But of course, that was only a dream which this time would not come true.

“Have a safe flight baby,” you said with tears in your eyes as you straightened out Hyunjin’s scarf.

The day of the members departure was here. Most of the boys were already outside gathering their luggage, but Hyunjin stayed behind in the van to say goodbye to you.

“Aww don’t cry love. I’ll be back before you know it! And we’ll talk on the phone every night.” Hyunjin said as he wiped your tears away.

“You better,” you mumbled with a pout on your face causing Hyunjin to chuckle.

“Now give me a kiss!” Hyunjin demanded.

He pulled you close and slotted his lips with yours, pressing sweet kisses again and again. You clutched onto his sweatshirt, holding tight as he deepened the kiss, a small moan leaving his lips as his tongue tangled with yours. You both were lost in each other, neither wanting to let go, but time had other plans. There was a sharp rap on the window which startled you both causing you to jump away from each other.

“Well I guess I should go,” Hyunjin murmured as he ran his hand through his hair.

“Yeah,” you said, your voice laced with sadness.

Hyunjin gathered his bags and opened the door to climb out to a sea of fans and flashing lights. He spared you one more glance, giving you a small smile before stepping next to the others. You watched him as the van drove away, away from your lover.

You weren’t sure what to expect over the next five months, but you hoped it would go by quickly.

When you arrived home, you walked into an empty house as Jinnie was back at the building recording songs for the next album. You took the opportunity to get some work done yourself. You grabbed your sketchbook and some snacks and made yourself cozy on the couch. You began to sketch, finishing up some designs on some dresses.

Time passed as you worked, you getting lost in the vision that was being translated on paper that you didn’t hear the door open as Jinnie came home. He was so quiet that you were startled when he sat next to you to peer over your shoulder.

“Whatcha doing?” Jinnie asked, curiosity in his eyes.

“Oh my god!” You screeched as you clutched at your chest. “You scared me!”

Jinnie’s face changed from curiosity to something sadder, his eyes downcast as he fumbled with his fingers. He didn’t mean to scare you, he just wanted to see what you were working on, wanting to be there for you since Hyunjin was gone.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to,” Jinnie said, giving you puppy dog eyes as if he was begging for attention.

You regarded the man next to you. He was dressed in grey sweats and a white t-shirt with his hair in a half up, half down hairstyle…just how Hyunjin was dressed for his travels. Did Jinnie dress like Hyunjin on purpose? You’re not sure but it was weird.

“It’s okay,” you said as you closed your sketchbook. You were definitely not getting anymore work done tonight.

You both sat in silence, unsure of what to say or do…that is until your stomach growled. Jinnie perked up, a grin on his face.

“Wanna order take out?” He inquired, cocking his head to the side.

“Um, sure,” you murmured. “While you order I’m going to go take a shower.”

Jinnie nodded and pulled out his phone, pulling up the delivery app to browse options.

You began to walk to your bedroom before remembering that he doesn’t know what to order you. Turning around you said, “Oh you can order me…”

But you were cut off, Jinnie picking up his head to look at you. “I know what you like.”

You stared at him, unsure of what to say. He knew what you liked? How was that possible? Hyunjin always did the ordering. Did Hyunjin discuss with Jinnie your likes and dislikes? You looked up to see Jinnie staring at you, with a look on his face you couldn’t quite place. It was slightly unsettling as he didn’t blink, but sat frozen with his eyes trained on you.

“Oh…okay then,” you said before booking it to your bedroom.

Once on the other side of the door, you let out a breath of relief. That was a little weird you must admit and the way he stared at you, like he knew something you didn’t. As your heart rate settled, you padded across the room, gathering the things you needed for your shower.

You turned the water on and stripped your clothes off before getting under the warm stream of water. You emptied your mind, the thoughts of what just occurred leaving your mind and draining with the water that ran down your body. Once your mind was clear, you were able to fully enjoy your shower, the scent of your honey and green tea body wash relaxing you.

You stayed under the stream until the water ran cold. You quickly got out wanting to put on something warm, plus your stomach was rumbling so loud you’re sure the neighbors could hear it. You put on your favorite pjs and passed Hyunjin’s sweatshirt over your head, taking in his scent.

Satisfied and refreshed, you returned to the living room to the smell of comfort food. You walked a little faster, ready to dig into whatever Jinnie ordered. As you entered, Jinnie looked up with a smile and gestured for you to sit next to him.

“Here you go, all plated up and ready for you to eat!” He exclaimed as he set down a plate of food.

You were taken aback, not used to having your plate made, but accepted it nonetheless. As you scooped the first bite of Mac and cheese into your mouth, you let out a moan, savoring the cheese on your tastebuds. This was just what you needed after a day like today.

You both ate in silence, watching the show that Jinnie picked before you came in. He doted on you every second of dinner, making sure you had enough food and drink. If you needed something, he got it for you, not wanting you to get up. Things were okay until he reached out to wipe a string of cheese off your chin, his gaze on you.

It felt oddly intimate, the man who looked just like your boyfriend cleaning your face. You were conflicted, not sure if you should accept the help or push him away. However, before you could decide, he pulled back before sticking the finger he just cleaned your face with in his mouth. You stared in shock as he sucked on the digit, licking the food residue clean.

As he removed his finger with a pop, he chuckled and turned to look back at the tv like nothing happened. You were still frozen in place, your mind trying to catch up to what Jinnie just did. Maybe it was time to retire for the night, before anything else occured.

You thanked Jinnie for the food and excused yourself to lock yourself in your bedroom. Is this what things would be like with Hyunjin gone? You were a mix of emotions, the feeling of confusion, fear, and a little excitement stirring deep within. You began to get ready for bed, wanting to be within the safety and comfort of your blankets. — — Jinnie wanted to make sure everything was perfect for you. He knew you would be sad that Hyunjin was gone but he found that an obstacle he could easily remedy. After all he was here. He is Hyunjin, whether you realized it or not. He has Hyunjin’s looks, his mannerisms, characteristics, he is the perfect copy of the man you called your boyfriend.

He began to clean up the mess from dinner, a smile on his face at how it went. He could tell you were impressed as he made sure you had everything you needed. Even though it was only the first day, things were going smoothly, and if he had anything to say about it, he would continue to make sure it remained so.

As the weeks passed, you became used to Jinnie, how he took care of you, gave you company after he was done with work. You weren’t lonely, which you were thankful for. You finished your sketches for work and had delivered them to the team, the next phase of the project fully underway. You spoke with Hyunjin every night, discussing your day and listening to him talk about his performances.

You missed him dearly, expressing so on the phone every night. Your heart swelled as you listened to Hyunjin profess his love to you, promising to come back very soon. Listening to his voice calmed you, making you feel more at ease with the time remaining that he would be gone. Every time Hyunjin ended the call, he’d always remind you to let Jinnie care for you in any way you needed, making you promise that you’d do so.

After speaking with Hyunjin one night, you laid in bed wide awake, your mind on your boyfriend instead of sleep. You needed him, wanted to feel him, touch him as it’s been so long. With a sigh, you began to drift your hands over your body, lightly brushing them over your breasts, circling your nipples causing you to become wet.

You slowly drifted your hands down, slipping it within your panties to touch your aching core. You began to circle your clit, letting out a mewl at the pleasure that your fingers brought you. Your mind drifted to Hyunjin, thinking of how he would touch you, soft and gentle at first before speeding up, bringing you to your high and savoring the little sounds you made as you let go.

Your eyes were closed as you continued to pleasure yourself, your orgasm steadily building at the thought of your lover. Your moans increased in pitch with each passing minute to the point you didn’t hear the door crack open and Jinnie step in.

You rocked your hips against your fingers, moaned Hyunjin’s name like a prayer, your eyes opening briefly just to see Jinnie standing at the door staring at you, a bulge clearly visible in the sweatpants he was wearing. You let out a gasp and removed your fingers from your panties before sitting up.

“What are you doing here?!” You shrieked, pulling your blankets up your legs to cover yourself.

Jinnie continued to look at you with lust in his eyes. He heard you from his room, your sweet moans as you called out his name as you pleasured yourself. He tried to ignore it, but you just sounded too sweet.

“Let me make you feel good,” Jinnie said as he slowly walked toward you. “You need me baby, so let me. Will you?”

Shit, he must have heard you through the walls. You continued to eye him as he stalked towards you, a pleading look on his face. You were still wet, your panties sticking to your skin, a constant reminder to what you were doing before you were interrupted. You were sad at how you weren’t able to orgasm, the need still pooling in your core.

Your mind was so hazy, drunk with lust and filled with need that you wanted to believe Jinnie was Hyunjin. You remembered how you craved Hyunjin’s touch, wanting to fall apart at the mercy of his fingers. Looking at the man in front of you, you thought fuck it and leaned back on your pillow and removed your blankets from your lower half, exposing your soaked core to him.

Jinnie licked his lips, his eyes trained on your covered pussy, your folds clearly visible through your panties. He quickly scrambled onto the bed, laying on his stomach to come face to face with your core.

You watched as he looked you in the eyes before pressing a soft kiss to your covered clit over and over leaving you breathless at the teasing sensation. Jinnie was in no rush as he pressed kisses down your left thigh, then your right before once more pressing a kiss to your clit.

By this point, you were begging, pleading for him to touch you so you could cum, the pleasure so overwhelming from his actions that you felt sparks shoot down your thighs and little flutters in your belly.

Jinnie chuckled as he pushed your panties to the side, finally coming face to face with your sopping folds. You let out a loud moan as he licked up your slit before taking your clit in his mouth and began to suckle the bud. Your fingers tangled in his hair, guiding his head as plunged his tongue into your hole. With each groan he let out, your arousal gushed out, coating his face as he licked up every drop, not wanting to waste your sweet slick.

You were close, the feeling of the band coiling tighter and tighter within you. You gripped Jinnie’s hair tighter, spreading your legs wider so he could continue without hindrance.

“Lemme come, please, please,” you whimpered.

Jinnie let out a hum, acknowledging your pleas. He’d like nothing more for you to come on his tongue. With a few more suckles he heard you let out a moan as you let go, copious amounts of your release leaking out of your pussy to trickle down your ass and coat his chin. He licked you clean, sticking his tongue in your entrance one last time to massage your walls as you came down.

Once he felt your grip slack on his hair, he leaned back, and gazed down at you. You stared back at him, noticing his blown out pupils and raging boner. All you could do was regulate your breathing as you watched him strip, his shirt coming off with ease to reveal his toned abs, followed by his sweats, his cock springing out and slapping his belly.

You took him in, your eyes glued to his cock that was perfectly identical to Hyunjin’s, down to the little mole on the shaft that you loved so much. Jinnie scooted closer to you and lifted your legs up and onto his shoulders before sheathing himself within you.

You moaned at the familiar stretch, your mind blown with how he can feel just like your boyfriend. You didn’t have time to think much as he began to thrust his hips, dragging his cock in and out of your pussy at a fast pace. It was uncanny at how he knew how to fuck you, how to angle his hips so he can reach that spot that makes your toes curl.

Jinnie smirked at you as if he could read your thoughts, gripping your legs tighter as he slammed his hips into yours. You were his, that he was certain, and he was going to keep it that way.

You clenched around his cock as you felt your orgasm build once more, shock on your face mixed with pleasure at the fact that you were going to come again so soon.

“That’s right baby, come on my cock. Come on Jinnie’s cock,” he cooed, bringing one hand down to thumb at your clit.

You felt the pressure build in your lower belly, stronger than it usually was. The pressure was so much that you thought you were going to pee. Before you could mumble for Jinnie to stop, you let go, your orgasm hitting you hard. You tossed your head back as your vision went white, little stars forming in front of you as you heard a ringing in your ears. You felt your release leak out, so much so that you began to panic.

“No no baby, just lay back, you squirted baby and that’s just so fucking hot,” Jinnie moaned as he punctuated each syllable with a thrust of his hips.

His eyes drifted to your pussy, how wet you were, your pussy talking with each drag of his cock within you. You were perfect, your pussy was perfect, and he was going to claim you, mark you as his. With a few more thrusts, he stilled, his pelvis flush to your ass as he came, his cum flooding your insides and mixing with your slick that was now starting to pool on the sheets.

As he came down from his high, he withdrew his cock, watching as his cum seeped from your pussy. He looked up into your eyes, his heart fluttering as you gazed up at him with a look he couldn’t decipher. He started to get up, thinking he’s overstayed his welcome when you reached out and mumbled “stay.”

You were more than satisfied, your lower half full of his cum, your clit and pussy tingling from the abuse it received. Maybe it’s because you were missing Hyunjin, but as Jinnie got up to leave, you reached out to him and said the one word you never thought you’d say. You watched as Jinnie looked in shock, but then love as he scooted next to you, cuddling you close to his body.

As time passed your eyes became heavy, sleep catching up to your exhausted body. And with the sound of Jinnie’s beating heart and warmth he provided, you feel into a deep sleep.

— —

Ever since you let Jinnie in your bed, it’s become a ritual, where he joins you once you’ve showered. He makes sweet love to you, providing you with orgasm after orgasm until you fall asleep, satisfied and exhausted.

You didn’t mind, matter of fact you were ecstatic, your needs being taken care of while Hyunjin was gone. You mentioned to him one night about the arrangement worried he would object. However, he wholeheartedly thought it was okay, happy that you were being cared for in more ways than one.

Jinnie was your savor in Hyunjin’s absence. He took such good care for you, no matter how tired he was from rehearsal. He made your meals, pampered you, fucked you, made sure you didn’t want for nothing. At first you didn’t mind, as it was nice to be doted on, especially in your lovers absence. However, over time you started to notice slight differences in Jinnie’s behavior.

He became more clingy, wanting to be with you whenever he wasn’t at work. However, that even changed when one day he suggested you bring your work with you so you could join him at the studio. When you declined, he felt dejected, his head hung low with hurt in his eyes. You didn’t care however, as you wanted to carry on with life as usual, not breaking up your routine, especially when it came to work.

Things seemed to be okay as Jinnie backed down a little, staying in his lane and just going with the flow. He hadn’t joined you in bed for a few weeks now, wanting to give you your space. You were grateful for it, needing the room to breathe and take time to think.

However, you began to miss Hyunjin even more as month four hit, his absence starting to take a toll on you.

Jinnie started to notice a change in your behavior, noticing that you seemed more sad than usual. Thinking you needed to be pampered he planned a movie night filled with your favorite snacks.

You joined begrudgingly, not really wanting to be next to him, but also not wanting to hurt his feelings. You chose your snacks and grabbed a blanket to cuddle up for the movie.

Halfway through, Jinnie turned to you and placed a hand on your knee. “Y/n, what’s wrong?”

You looked at Jinnie and said, “I’m just missing Hyunjin,” which was the truth. Your mind was actually on your boyfriend and what you two would be doing right now if he was home.

“Oh y/n, don’t you get it? I am Hyunjin,” Jinnie said.

You were taken aback at his response. The way he was looking at you as if he needed you to understand what he said, to how his hand was still on your knee made you feel uncomfortable.

“You’re not Hyunjin,” you countered, narrowing your eyes at the clone.

“Why of course I am,” Jinnie said with a confused face.

You slowly began to unravel yourself from the blankets and stand up to back away slowly. Something isn’t right. The clone truly believes he is Hyunjin. You didn’t know what to say so you continued to back up until you reached your room. You fumbled for the doorknob and finally finding it, you gave it a twist and quickly stepped inside. After closing the door, you locked it, the click it made making you feel a little more safe.

You walked to your bedside and found your phone, dialing Hyunjin’s number immediately.

“Hey baby!” Hyunjin answered enthusiastically.

You felt the opposite of happy however. “Hyunjin, I’m scared,” you voiced, a slight tremble evident in your voice.

“Why? What’s wrong?” Hyunjin asked, his enthusiasm now turned to concern.

“Jinnie just said that he is you. I really think your clone thinks he’s the original you.”

Hyunjin was quiet, the line silent as the seconds passed on. Finally, Hyunjin responded, “Baby, what are you talking about?”

“You heard me!” You shrieked, desperation in your voice. “Isn’t there something you can do?!”

“Okay, okay, calm down love. I’ll talk with the manager and see what we can do okay?”

It wasn’t what you wanted to hear, but at least it was something. “Okay,” you softly said.

“Okay, good,” Hyunjin paused for a moment, listening to whoever was talking to him on the other side. “Listen love, I gotta go. I’ll talk to the manager and then let you know what they say. I love you.”

“I love you too,” you said and hung up.

Now what were you going to do? You couldn’t stay in here forever, although it was tempting. Maybe just for tonight? Yeah, that would work and then tomorrow you can face the nightmare that was right outside your door. — — “Good morning baby!” Jinnie said as he gestured for you to sit, as he had made a huge spread for breakfast.

You cautiously sat down and grabbed some toast, nibbling on the corners as you eyed the clone.

“I was thinking we could go to the park today. I have an empty schedule today.”

You really didn’t want to go anywhere with this clone, but for your safety, you may have to play along.

“Okay,” you agreed half heartedly.

Jinnie’s face lit up at your answer and continued to eat his breakfast. After you finished your toast you got up and walked to the couch, plopping down on the soft cushions. You waited for Jinnie to finish, not wanting to be in the same room with him if you didn’t have to.

However, all too soon, he finished his meal and came to stand beside you waiting for you to get up. Sighing you followed him out of the door, your mood the total opposite of his. You stayed silent as he chattered away filling your day with him.

— —

And so it went day after day, you making sure Jinnie was happy, and unsuspicious. You didn’t let him into your bed anymore, not feeling safe with the prospect. Each night, Hyunjin would reassure you everything would be alright and he’d be home soon, in less than a week in fact. You wanted the days to pass quickly, so you wouldn’t have to be in the house by yourself with Jinnie anymore.

Jinnie slowly started to notice the change, after you turned your head away as he tried to kiss you. He stared at you confused, his eyes trying to catch yours. He tried to kiss you again before you pushed him away. He felt a fire build in his chest at your refusal. Don’t you want, no need him? He’s your boyfriend after all.

“Can I not kiss my girlfriend?” He questioned, reaching out for you.

“I’m not your girlfriend,” you said, not sure what he would do next.

“What do you mean? Of course you’re my girlfriend!” He said with a chuckle.

“You’re not hyunjin!”

This again. Jinnie was tired of hearing you say that. When would you understand he is Hyunjin, the one and only. He is Hyunjn, your boyfriend, the love of your life. Glaring at you, he stepped closer, watching as you stepped back in fear.

“I. Am. Hyunjin.”

Three words, each punctuated in a menacing tone. You were afraid, not sure what he would do. You slowly backed up toward the door, wanting to keep a safe distance between you and the clone.

“Where are you going baby? Why are you running from me?” Jinnie asked, his face falling into a pleading look.

“Stay…stay back!” You shouted as you got closer to the door.

Jinnie began to shake his head, his hands reaching up to grasp at the strands of hair. He dropped them suddenly and rushed towards you, his voice loud and pleading.

“Please baby! I love you! I am Hyunjin! Why are you turning me away?”

You were about to let out a blood curdling scream when Jinnie stopped in his tracks, his face scrunched up in confusion. He tried to move, but found he couldn’t, his eyes on yours. A few more seconds passed before he collapsed on the floor in a heap, his eyes staring straight ahead.

What just happened? You were staring at the clone in shock, too scared to move. Suddenly, you heard a key in the door and stepped away so you wouldn’t get hit. The door opened quickly and Hyunjin stepped through concern on his face as he took in the scene before him.

“Y/n!” He said as he ran to you, engulfing you in his arms for a hug.

You clutched onto his shirt, breathing in his scent that was so familar to you. Hyunjin is here. The real Hyunjin. Your Hyunjin. You buried your face in his chest and began to sob tears of happiness. You were happy this nightmare was over. — — After that eventful day, someone from the company came to take Jinnie away. Hyunjin explained that he was able to get in contact with the manager who spoke with the engineers on possible solutions to your problem. They suggested a system shut down, deactivating the little chip that was implanted in the clones head.

The whole process took thirty minutes, the perfect amount of time for Hyunjin to get from the airport and back to you. He listened as you explained everything that happened, how Jinnie assumed the role of Hyunjin, as he thoroughly was convinced he was the original.

He became obsessed with the role, wanting you to believe it too, which obviously you knew it wasn’t true. After you were done with your tale, Hyunjin cradled you to his body, running his fingers through your hair.

“I’m so glad you’re okay love,” he whispered as he pressed a kiss to your head.

You hummed in agreement, snuggling closer to your lover. “So what happens next? You know…since you won’t have a clone?”

“Oh I’ll have to just make it work and work a little extra, but it’ll be worth it if it means you’re safe.”

Your heart ached at the fact that he would have to put in overtime to pick up the slack, but you understood his stance. You wanted to be safe and with your boyfriend, with no extras in the house such as a clone.

-- -- Life went back to normal after a while. You had a successful fashion show, your designs impressing the judges and catching the eyes of some of the fashion gurus. Hyunjin was working more, but was handling the process with grace.

He always came home to you with a smile on his face, ready to smoother you with love. You were glad to have someone in your bed again, happy that it was your boyfriend as he knew you the best, loved you the best.

Hyunjin made sure to remind you nightly as he sheathed himself within your walls, fucking you nice and slow as he whispered sweet nothings in your ear, as he touched you just right, grinning as you fell apart to his fingers, mouth, cock.

Yes, life was back to normal and the clone was a thing of the past. You were happy to have your ordinary life back, the thought of the clone slowly being pushed into the back of the recesses of your mind. You had to be around the other members clones occasionally, but that you didn’t mind, as they seemed normal and understood their place.

What once was a good idea turned into a nightmare, as sometimes having a copy of yourself can do more harm than good.

taglist: @jehhskz @jeonginsleftcheek @armystay89 @palindrome969 @slut4hee @ivydoesit23 @amarecerasus @kaysungshine @fun-fanfics @baby-stay92 @velvetmoonlght @possum-playground @katsukis1wife @my-neurodivergent-world @hanniebaeee @hwanghyunjinismybae @channiesrightasscheek

[rhyrhy]

Denial is a team sport!

Tryouts series | A.A

[content warnings:] bullying, sexual tension, talks of virginity, language, physical violence, heartbreak. R! Hates the world! Enemies to lovers. Slightly unserious.

wc: 4.4k

notes: sooo I made some edits to the prologue after I wrote the first chapter, so I do highly recommend you at least go back n skim read it!

series masterlist | previous ch

Abby swore she had a plan.

Let the liquid courage run through her veins and finally make a move on the girl she had been eyeing since move-in day. Especially now that the same girl was finally single. To be completely honest, she wasn’t sure what you seen in her teammate in the first place.

She didn’t realize her own mouth would be her worst enemy—until it was too late. The usual suave that made girls swoon? It almost earned her a slap to the face.

And as much as she hated hearing her roommate say it, she really felt like such an idiot. Now, she had a bigger problem than just her failed first impression.

The art of making a scene was a skill you and Abby Anderson had mastered. Worse, you mastered it together.

And now, in the reflection of the ticking, large brown and cream clock behind you, there you both sat—side by side in the dean’s office.

The room was quiet, a hum of an old fan and the scratch of a pen dragging across paper. Blue ink detailing your most recent development just an hour prior.

The dean exhaled sharply, finally looking up.

Your arms were crossed, one leg over the other, while Abby sat comfortably still—just as over it. Matching busted lips like accessories.

“You two just can’t seem to stay out of trouble, can you?”

Abby exhaled a small laugh—until you shot her a glare. Before either of you could defend yourselves, the morning came rushing back.

Denial is one hell of a drug.

And right now, you were all drowning in it.

Abby was trying—and failing—to shake off her drunken slip-up. She shot up in bed, eyes snapping to the clock. Fuck. She was already late.

Dina was desperately trying to keep you away from the video currently making its rounds on social media.

And you? You were pretending none of it bothered you.

It’s fine. Everything is fine.

You were fine last night. And you were totally fine now as you set your duffel bag down on the bench.

The girls were quiet. But you knew they wanted to ask, to poke and prod. Everyone had seen it. Joked about it. Like it was some kind of championship replay.

It shouldn’t even be a big deal. People bicker all the time. What even was said? Then you heard it again.

“At least I didn’t let one bad breakup ruin my life.”

You whip your head around. Two teammates are hunched over a phone, the sound of your own voice mixed with Abby’s echoing from it. Oh right. The conversation was less than friendly.

“Hey! Turn that off and get to warm-ups,” Dina snaps, her captain voice demanding.

They scramble off, the video disappearing with a click, but it’s too late—you’ve already heard it. Again. Just another reminder of how right she was. You’ve been a mess, internally and on the field.

“Hey.” Dina’s voice is softer now, a hand resting lightly on your back.

“Hi.” You reply, setting out your water bottle and uniform bow, rolling your shoulders like you can physically shake off the drama.

There’s no usual pep in her tone. She knows you—knows how this is affecting you—but this is a side of you she hasn’t seen in a long time. Down, gloomy, and set off if someone even chewed too loud.

“You okay?”

“Yeah. Fine.” You nod, smiling—faker than the extensions in your hair. You straighten your posture, trying to seem put together.

“Help stretch me out?” you ask, already moving toward an open mat, desperate to push past the painfully obvious.

Dina nods, sitting beside you, helping you stretch your thighs. But it’s impossible for her not to notice how off you are, how forced your words sound with each syllable.

“ lying, It doesn’t suit you.” Her hand settles on your knee as she continues. “Don’t pull the ‘I’m fine’ bullshit with me. You’re definitely not.”

“Oh, right, because I’d fall apart over some drunken argument?” Stretching an arm across your chest. “I’m saying it’s fine because it is.”

Dina shifts, turning to face you head-on now.

“I know you. And I’ve seen how you’ve been acting these past few months. I could read you in my sleep. You can lie to everyone else, but not to me. You’re cracking—you’re—“

“—Jesus, Dee! Can I just fucking stretch?”

You groan, throwing your hands up before leaning back on them. Your voice is louder than you intended, ringing out across the field.

“See? There it is. That attitude I’ve been seeing all season.” Dina is pushing now, and she knows it. But she’s tired of your bullshit.

“I know you don’t want to talk about it. I know you’d rather just bottle it up until you explode. But seriously? You’ve got to stop running yourself into the ground.”

She stands up abruptly, ponytail swinging.

“So yes, you can stretch. Alone.”

“Dina, wait—” You sigh, crossing your arms, feeling the weight of a few stares and pointedly ignoring them. God, this is all Anderson’s fault. The thought loops in your head like a curse, her being the chosen person for blame.

Dina’s footsteps slow, but she doesn’t turn. Her voice carries in the air just enough to let you know she’s done. “What? I thought you didn’t want to talk about it.”

“I don’t.” You pause. “But please just—sit, okay? I’m sorry, I’m just… overwhelmed, I think.”

She huffs but sits back down, crossing her legs, fully facing you. “Overwhelmed? Or just in denial?”

“Denial?” You scoff. “Please. Everyone seems highly aware of what’s going on in my life, so that’s not even possible.”

She rolls her eyes. “Everyone’s ‘highly aware’ because they have eyes. It doesn’t take a genius to see you’re not yourself.”

Her gaze scans your face, waiting for some kind of acknowledgment. “You’ve been snapping at people left and right. Hell, you’ve chewed my head off more than usual.”

You lower your arm, a creeping discomfort settling in. The breakup, the humiliation, the anger—it’s all piling up. Your shoulders sag. “That bad, huh?”

She nods, her previous irritation fading into concern. “Yeah. Pretty bad.”

She hesitates, then presses on. “Look, I get it. Martinez messed you up, and you’re pissed.”

“It’s not about her—” you cut in, hating that name hitting your ears.

“Please. If I got screwed over like that, I’d be pissed, too. But you’ve been like this since the breakup, and now you’re just lashing out at everyone.”

The more she spoke, the more the reminders came. The tears. The weight loss from barely eating. Dina dragging you through the shared house just to make you shower. Rock bottom—all from one girl. Realizing she’s touched a nerve, she sighs, dragging a hand through her raven hair. She remembers just how bad the fallout was. Letting someone in, only for them to shut you out. Burying themselves in your heart without caring if they left traces behind.

“Look, I know you’re not gonna wake up tomorrow and turn into sunshine and rainbows, but you’ve gotta do something. Because right now? You’re on a one-way road to a full-blown breakdown town.”

A pause. Then—

“I was talking with Coach, and… maybe you need a break. Tryouts are coming back up, so it’s not like we’d be down a spot—”

You had to stop her, not wanting to hear that finished thought. “What—? Hold on, you can’t do that. You know I’ve been looking forward to redeeming myself this time around. Now you think I’m just going to sit out?”

“Yes. Yes, I do think you’re gonna sit out. Because you’re a mess right now. This isn’t about redemption. This is about you pushing yourself to the brink because you can’t get over that sorry ass.”

“I’m sick of it. The coaching staff is sick of it. Hell, even the girls at Kappa are sick of it.”

She exhales sharply, leaning forward.

“We’re taking you off the roster for a minimum of two weeks. That’s all.”

Your head snaps up so fast you’d worry it would break. You’d never been taken off, ever. If anything, you were first pick next to Dina, Caitlyn, and a few others who were almost just as polished but not quite. With the heavy shelf full of trophies, medals, and countless pictures with a proud smile from elementary gymnastics up to now—this was a part of you. All of you.

“No—no! Don’t do this to me. Please, it’s the only thing keeping me sane right now—”

Dina’s expression softens, her tone lowering into a gentle whisper—almost as if she genuinely felt sorry for you.

“Yeah, that’s the problem. Cheer shouldn’t be the only thing keeping you ‘sane.’ It’s not supposed to be your entire identity.”

She reaches for your shoulder again, her hand resting on the black fabric of your tank top.

“You’ll thank me later once you’ve gotten your head on straight again.”

You love Dina, but in this moment, all you want is to wrap your hands around her throat. Despite the violent urge, you stay silent.

Instead, you meet the eye contact you’ve been avoiding since last night, knowing her big puppy eyes will pull you back to reality. She’s trying to help, you know that. But what are you supposed to do for two weeks? Fourteen days. 335 hours.

Maybe for someone in a clear headspace, two weeks of rest sounds nice, but for a girl who can’t separate herself from the uniform she wears, it feels like hell.

Dina waits for the snappy reply, the angry words, or maybe just your jaw clenched so tightly your teeth might shatter. Instead, she hears a quiet:

“Yeah, Okay.”

Then, the weight of your head settles on her right shoulder. Dina lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. This was the girl she missed—the softer version, even if you’d been moping around. She knew it would pass, just hoping you didn’t push her away before the gray cloud lifted, making way for a bluer sky.

For a moment, it felt nice. The intelligible chatter reminded you of your surroundings—until, suddenly, you felt out of place where you least expected it.

Your throat tightened as you blinked away the burning in your eyes. You had to push it down. You couldn’t cry now. So you quickly muttered something to get yourself out of there.

“Alright, I’ll see you at home then?”

“Yeah,” she agreed softly, patting your knee once more. “See you at home.”

Dina watched as you stood up, slinging your duffel bag over your shoulder and making your way across the open field. The loud whistle redirected her attention. She brushed off the few strands of grass clinging to her legs, giving your retreating figure one last glance.

The coach’s sharp voice cut through the lingering conversations. “Alright, bring it in!”

Dina pushed herself up, stretching her arms over her head before glancing at the rest of the girls. “She just needs to cool off,” she said, more to herself than anyone. “She’ll be fine.”

Caitlyn leaned in slightly, lowering her voice. “You think she’s good, though? She’s been kinda—”

“Intense?” Josephine, the blonde, chimed in. “Yeah, I’m kinda relieved she stormed off this time. Maybe now we can finish a damn drill without her biting someone’s head off.”

Dina shot her a look, lips pressing into a thin line. “Yeah, maybe don’t talk about her like that when she’s not here to defend herself.”

Josephine scoffed, raising her hands in mock surrender. “I’m just saying—”

The coach clapped their hands together, effectively cutting off the conversation. “Let’s go! I want focus this time!”

With that, they all fell back into line, shaking off the moment and refocusing on the drills ahead.

The walk felt aimless. If you went back home now, the questions would come. Admitting that your attitude got you put on timeout would sound too much like you were the loose cannon everyone said you were.

The sun beamed down on the exposed skin of your arms. Once the group was out of view, you sank onto the bleachers on the opposite side of the field, pressing your elbows against your thighs. The metal burned under you, but it was nothing compared to the frustration simmering in your chest.

From here, you could see the restrooms and the now-empty concession stands—during game nights, the lines were insufferable. Now, everything was still, and for the first time all morning, you could breathe.

Maybe some peace was needed after all.

Maybe you had been more intense since it happened.

And maybe you just needed a good cry.

Your shoulders sagged, defenses dropping. The tears burned as they fell, silent but unstoppable. What a shitty morning. Frustration took over, your hands moving without thinking, yanking your hair out of its perfectly tied updo. The strands fell loose around your face—messy, undone. Not so picture perfect. You hadn’t been in a while.

So bad, in fact, that they’d started calling you—

“Watch out, Time Bomb’s about to go off again.”

The snicker cut through your pity party. Laughter followed, the kind that made your skin crawl. So much for peace.

Of course, it’s one of those days—the kind where you’re forced to share the field with the rowdiest, cockiest group on campus. The ones who tackled each other for fun, who walked like they owned the place, who didn’t know when to shut the hell up.

One nudged the other with a elbow, grinning.

“Careful. One wrong move and she might start swinging.”

You should sit up, square your shoulders, act like you don’t hear them. Instead, your body felt heavy. The weight of the morning, the season, the past four months pressing down. So you ducked your head, staring at the ground like maybe—just maybe—if you didn’t acknowledge them, they’d move on.

Then came her voice. Annoyingly high-pitched.

“Knock it off.”

The condescension was thick. She didn’t actually care. You knew who it was before you even looked up. Savannah green, The replacement herself.

Long legs, smooth skin, lips always pulled into that pristine, porcelain smile. her arm lazily draped around Martinez like she had something to prove. And the look she shot you? Amused. Pitying. Like you were some kind of sad little joke.

Your jaw clenched. Nails dug into your palms.

God, you still hated her.

Hated them.

Four months earlier…

Virginity. Most girls lose it early—peer pressure, trying to catch up with their friends, or thinking they’ve found the one. They look at you differently once you share your body. Tie your soul to theirs, if you believe in that kind of thing.

But not you.

With a helicopter mom obsessed with appearances and a future in professional cheer ahead of you, relationships were hard to come by. Harder to keep.

Which is why you adored your first girlfriend.

At first She was sweet, understanding—the kind of girl who’d offer you her hoodie the second you muttered about being cold.

But lately, she’d been… pushy.

Her new group of friends had changed her, little by little. Since when was she so fixated on sex? What happened to I’m ready when you are?

So when her hand snaked into your jeans that night, fingers brushing against the fabric of your underwear, and her kisses swallowed your quiet protest—You had to fully pull back, laughing nervously.

“Woah, slow down.”

She groaned, running a hand through her dark hair. “You do this every time.”

Guilt twisted inside you. You reached out, cupping her cheek. “Babe, I’m just—”

“—Not ready. I get it.” With her head already turning away from you.

The air in the car shifted. You slowly slid back into the passenger seat. thing were so different now. Life pulling you both in different directions, those promises of being able to stick together through it all feeling emptier than the quick ‘love you’s she’d throw out like it automated reply.

She was different. The kind you struggled to recognize anymore. Before you could say another word, her phone buzzed.

You glanced down.

Savannah. That name again. The one she swore was just a friend. Just someone she passed notes with. Nothing to worry about.

Valeria let out a sigh, glancing at her screen before locking it again with a click. “I should take you home.”

“Oh—I thought it was date night?”

She only shrugged, shifting into reverse. “Yeah, well, it’s getting late.”

You should’ve known that night. Dina had tried to warn you, but that only earned her the cold shoulder.

She was right. She was always right. Because that night? Valeria didn’t go home. She found the first warm body that let her press up against them. The same girl she swore you didn’t have to worry about. Plastered all over that stupid Instagram page—Exposed UW. The one that thrived off campus scandals.

Abby had seen the post, too. Not that she’d been looking—it was impossible to miss. She still remembered the way your name had been tagged under the grainy party pictures, how the comments filled with half-hearted damns and yikes. The way she felt a little sick to her stomach reading them. Because sure, maybe she didn’t know you that well back then. But she knew enough to know She remembered thinking—Shit. She doesn’t deserve that. months later, you would still were holding onto that anger, looking at her like she was the enemy.

And Dina? She just patted your back as you screamed into your pillow, now wishing she’d brought earplugs.

“I hate her! I hate everything about her!”

Tears burned your face, breath hitching, body shaking as you chucked a fluffy pink pillow across the room. It bounced uselessly against the wall.

“She’d rather be the first whore to spread her legs than pick me?” Your voice ricocheted through the shared sorority housing. “Oh wow, congrats, Valeria! You’re a statistical cliché! So unique! So rebellious!“

You threw your hands up. “And her? Really? You wanted to date someone who looks like a Red Bull commercial come to life? ‘Oh, don’t worry, we’re just friends.’ Yeah, okay! Well, newsflash—friends don’t fuck each other!”

You grabbed your phone, scrolling furiously. “And this post? This post?” You shoved the screen toward Dina, voice in disgust.

“From head cheerleader to washed-up has-been? Some people peak in high school. Tough break.”

Dina winced hearing it read out loud, lowering the phone to see your face again. “You know that’s not true—“

“Washed. Up. Dina. Ugh!—says some loser who probably has no life of their own. so ‘ hey why not ruin someone else’s?’. Lame! “

You flung your phone onto the bed, hands flying to your head, Hair a nest of unbrushed strands. “Jesus, I mean—I suffered through hours of her indie garbage playlist just to impress her! And I—”

Your breath hitched. Eyes widening. A realization settled over you. The situation. What this meant.

“Oh my God.” You stumbled back. “I’m the tragic ex.”

“No, you’re not—”

“I am the tragic ex!” You shouted, to the ceiling.

Dina buried her face in her hands as you threw yourself dramatically onto the bed.

Back to this morning…

They just kept going, as if you weren’t even there. As much as you hated the nickname, they were lighting a match underneath you.

Walk away. Ignore them. Walk away.

With a deep exhale and a push of your palms, you stood up, preparing to do just that.

A small group straggled onto the field—probably the ones who overslept before practice. You barely registered them because another jag cut through the air.

With a fake pout, she continued, “Aw, you guys, don’t be mean. She’s had a rough time ever since, y’know…”

The audacity. The absolute gall to gesture between herself and Valeria, like she was doing you a favor by acknowledging it.

Valeria sighed, rubbing the back of her neck. “Savannah, chill.” She wasn’t even looking at you.

They were already moving on, setting up for practice like it was just another day.

That did it. Your vision blurred to crimson. A laugh escaped. “No, no. Let her talk. Since she clearly has so much to say.”

“Oh, I was just saying—”

Abby heard the taunting before she even saw the scene unfolding.

Still groggy from a late start to her morning, she stepped onto the field, body already bracing for a dreadfully long practice. And on top of everything, she couldn’t seem to stop thinking about you. That stupid viral clip of your argument looped in her head like a bad highlight reel. She’d gone over it a hundred times, picking apart what she said, how she said it, how your face twisted right before you shot back. Nora told her to just rip the Band-Aid off and apologize already. But it wasn’t that simple.

Second chances existed—sure. She was still working through how. Then, voices cut through her thoughts. Loud. Mocking. Her dark brows furrowed as she scanned the field. A few teammates laughing like they’d just cracked the funniest joke in the world.

But even odder—you. Standing stiffly, like a cat waiting to pounce.

Abby followed your line of sight, locking onto Savannah, who wore that smug little grin like she was waiting to be crowned homecoming queen.

And she knew that look on your face. The same one you’d given her the other night when you told her to stop pushing.

A slow inhale. Shoulders tensing. Abby felt it coming before it even happened

She barely had time to react before—

A collective gasp rang out, cut off by the impact of the ground.

Before she knew it, Weeks of poking a bear with Pom Poms had finally caught up. You ticked like a timebomb reaching its final countdown.

Fingers curled into the ironed fabric of Savannah’s perfect little shirt, your other hand balled into what she had coming for her.

A fist, flying right for her face.

Blue irises followed the movements of your drawn-back arm as it pistoned over and over and over and—oh my God, somebody please do something.

No. She should do something.

Her own belongings now lost on the ground, Abby decided to act fast before Savannah’s face or your fist was permanently disfigured.

With a rushed, fluid movement, strong arms locked around you, restricting any further hits. But not before your hand swung back, catching Abby in the process of prying you off the girl beneath you.

“Jesus—really?” Abby managed out, wincing as her head snapped slightly to the side.

With a heaving chest, you heard her voice first. Then the others.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” Savannah, breathless, clutching her bleeding nose.

“Did someone record that?”

“Is she okay?”

“Damn, Time Bomb. Didn’t know you had hands.”

And that’s how she found herself beside you once more.

This definitely wasn’t the second chance her roommate had been talking about. But still, she couldn’t help but feel like—maybe—it could be a start.

You didn’t hit her on purpose. At least, she hoped.

As the dean finished up paperwork and wrapped up a phone call or two, he leaned back in his chair, eyeing the both of you with thinly veiled exasperation.

“Well, I don’t know the full extent of the situation, but what I do know is that I have one student with a broken nose and some very angry parents.”

He sighed, rubbing his temple before continuing.

“This is a university of young adults, not a fight club full of children.”

“And while I’m fully aware of certain… patterns of behavior, I’m failing to see how that justifies violence.”

His gaze flickered to Abby , then to you. “Now, you’ve never once sat in this chair before, so I’m gracing you with a warning. But if I—or any other staff—catch you, Miss Anderson, and especially Miss Green, in any kind of altercation again…”

His voice dropped to something final.

“I can promise you, the fallout will be far worse.”

As the dark oak door clicked shut, Abby leaned back against the wall. The dean had far more choice words for you than for her.

When you finally reappeared, she got her first good look at you—disheveled, a broken nail, a busted lip from the one hit Savannah had managed to land, and a look that spoke a thousand words.

She thought back to the bubbly, soft-spoken girl she’d been pining over, and yeah… this wasn’t her. And maybe, just maybe, her stupid comment the other night had a butterfly effect. She braced herself. She knew you were going to let her have it. Again. But when you turned down the hall without so much as a glance in her direction, she felt something unexpected—offended.

“What, no ‘thank you’?” Fuck. That’s not what she meant to say.

But it got your attention immediately. Here we go. Maybe she was a masochist because the slow chuckle you let out as you turned to face her made the hairs on her arms stand on end.

“Thank you?” Disbelief dripped from your voice. “You want a thank you, Anderson?” You cocked your head at her,

Abby huffed, trying—and failing—to ignore the way her name sounded coming from you. God, she was losing it.

“Yeah, I do.” She held your gaze, chin jutted outward in defiance. “I just saved your ass.”

Before you could retort, she closed the distance between you. “You could be suspended. Or worse—kicked off the entire cheer team. And yet you won’t even look at me, let alone thank me.”

She was right in front of you now, almost toe to toe.

“I’m off for two weeks because of you! So it might as well be the same damn thing! Oh, don’t think that just because you decided to play Prince Charming, I’m about to kiss your damn feet.”

“So thanks for always somehow making my life worse!”

Abby’s eyes narrowed. Oh, we’re doing this? Blaming her of all people?

“Oh, right. Because it’s all my fault you can’t control your temper.” She scoffed and took a step closer, leaving mere inches between you. “You’re ridiculous.”

“And you’re—” You trailed off, eyes flickering over her face.

“You’re—!” You turned your back on her, ignore how she smells, ignore how she smells, before throwing up a hand.

“Ugh! Just piss off already!” You stormed down the hallway, needing space, air, anything but her. This god awful day.

“Oh yeah, real mature!” she called after you before turning on her heel and being off in the opposite direction.

Apologize? Her ass.

So yes, Abby swore she had a plan. She just never thought it would backfire so much in the last 72 hours.

Taglist cuties: @ferxanda @sigh-icantfindausername @caffeine-pup @grey-jedi12 @layalisthings @deadbolted @bambiaches

[mercurial-chuckles]

#4

Steve Rogers x reader??

HIS FIORE - PART 4 (Final)

Summary: Steve smexy Rogers moves into the neighborhood, and one evening, he catches you sneaking into the building opposite his through the fire escape. He watches curiously, slightly amused and, quite frankly, amazed by you. Guess what he does next? He writes a note, signs it with his middle name, Grant, and slips it under your door. How will you discover that Grant is none other than Captain America? Series Warnings: Language | Eventual smut | Mature content (minors DNI) | Steve's naughty thoughts | Steve in-love Rogers | Steve possessive jealous Rogers | Drunk Steve (adorable, hot mess) | Neighbors | Secret identity | Steve watching the reader from a distance (slightly stalker-ish…ish) | No Peggy in my canon divergent universe | A smidge of angst | Overloaded fluff | Happy happy ending

Chapter Warning: Smut, long smut, 4k length smut | Minors DNI | Language | Drunk hot mess Steve Rogers | Confessions | Adorable misunderstandings | slight Angst | Steve being menacingly hot despite being his first time | Steve Adonis Rogers | Sly Steve Rogers | Some D/S kinks unfolding (soft though) | Smidge of Angst | Tad longer than the first three parts | Lemme know if I'm missing anything

A/N: Finally finished writing this! Originally, I wrote two parts as connected prompts for Steve Rogers Bingo Round 3, but I've decided to revamp the entire piece. Also, I'm going to try sticking to a schedule--wish me luck! 😉 Banner credits: Me | Photo credits: The internet | Divider credits: @buck-star (Sydney, thanks a trillion ❤️) This part is also an entry to SMUT-BER FEST! Thank you, Ro, for sending in the ASK. You have no idea how much I appreciate you! Thank you! I'm sorry for the super delay. @ronearoundblindly I hope you enjoy reading it.

Also, Smutty September Fest has transgressed into SMUT-BER FEST! Am I complaining? Not at all. So, all my darling hoes, if your muse is musing and you want to submit your story/stories, please feel free to do so. Late submissions are more than welcome! Be wild; have fun!

Note: Do not Steal, Copy or Plagiarize any part of my work! Check out my other works: Masterlist This part is Unedited! I will edit it as soon as I can!

His Fiore Series Masterlist

Indulge Away!

The evening was peaceful until it wasn't.

Jake and Hannah, your friends from college, were in town for a wedding. They surprised you in the afternoon, dropping by your office, and you all but squealed. It had been ages since you saw them. The last time you visited them in Seattle was after they had their second son, Erik, three years ago.

You had taken the afternoon off. The three of you went to grab lunch, and you invited them over to your place, where you talked for hours, reminiscing about the good old days. When you first met Jake and Hannah, it was in sophomore year of Material Science class. You three teamed up for a project. They had been dating each other since the first year of college. You three became quick friends and often kept in touch. They invited you to their wedding, which was right after graduation. They've been happily married for nearly a decade and have two wonderful boys.

As the evening settled in, you asked to cook dinner, but they disagreed, wishing to go out. You had suggested the Italian restaurant down on Benton Ave. You often order takeouts from there, and the food was quite delicious. Hannah asked you to join them, but you politely declined knowing they could spend some alone time in the city without the kids.

Jake called in to reserve a table for them earlier when you said they were usually busy on Fridays, and they were getting ready to leave when you heard the loud, insistent knock at the door.

You frowned, casting a glance at the time. It was too early for Steve to return. He said he had training going on.

The knock came again, more aggressive this time. You rushed over to the door, pulling it open slowly.

Steve stood there in his tight blue undershirt and khakis. His usual immaculate appearance was slightly messy. His short hair was tousled, and his face was flushed like he had just run a marathon. Knowing him, he might have.

You gulped.

Panic sparked in you as you quickly glanced over your shoulder, spotting Jake adjust the small duffel bag while Hannah was in the restroom. Without hesitation, you stepped forward and tried to edge the door shut, shielding Steve from view.

It was just to protect him, his identity. If Jake or Hannah caught even a glimpse of Captain America standing at your door, it would mean a lot of explanation and complications for him.

Steve frowned at you, leaning closer with one hand on the wall beside you; he framed you in the small space. He smelled so good. You instinctively inched back, trying to shield yourself from the overwhelming effect his presence had on your senses.

You looked up at him. "Steve," you started. "Not the right time, I have…"

But he cut you off abruptly, scoffing. "Yeah, I know." His voice was louder than usual, slightly slurred. He jabbed his long, pointed finger behind you. "There was... a guy," he gritted, "On your... your balcony."

That was when you saw the hazy look in his eyes.

"Are you okay? You look…drunk," you subtly sniffed him, he wasn't reeking of alcohol. And you also knew he couldn't get drunk. Confused, you stared at him to say something.

Oh, fuck. Did Captain America do drugs? Were there… super-soldier serum-resistant drugs?

"Everything okay there?" Jake's voice called out, and before you could respond, Steve was pushing the door open to your living room.

You stood motionless, appalled.

What the hell was Steve doing?

"Jake, have you seen this bookshelf? We…" Hannah's voice trailed off as she suddenly stopped in her tracks and took in the scene.

Panic surged in your chest.

Damage control. Damage control.

If Jake and Hannah were as oblivious as Terry, you could tell them Steve was your gym instructor who lived next door. Yeah, that might work. You squared your shoulders, preparing to sell the lie with all the confidence you could muster.

Thud.

"Holy shit!" Hannah low-key squeaked, her phone slipping from her hands and hitting the carpeted floor.

You winced. Well, so much for that beautiful plan. Now you couldn't sell the idea that Steve was your non-existent gym instructor. It seemed not everyone was as oblivious as you or Terry. Good for them. Not so good for you, though.

But again, it was Steve's fault. Who were you kidding? Those muscles and that that face without those glasses, or a hat would be a dead giveaway any day.

You stood by the door, racking your brain to deal with the situation better, more effectively, while Steve stood pressed by your side now, sending heat through your entire body.

"No fucking way. You are…" Jake started, amazed, and you thought of Steve's potential reaction. You expected he would give them a shy, friendly smile, scratching his neck, entirely too modest, and saying, 'Hi, Steven Grant Rogers.' Or something along those lines.

But your mind couldn't comprehend Steve taking two long strides toward Jake, towering over the 5'11" man, pinning him down with a stare, and rasping, "Captain America. I live next door."

You gaped. Something was terribly, terribly wrong. Oh, he just kept digging the hole deeper. You slapped a palm over your eyes, and shook your head, confused and shocked.

"Holy shit," Hannah repeated, amazed.

"Umm…right…yeah," you chuckled awkwardly, taking a step closer, leaning onto the small cabinet by the main door for some support.

"Steve," you started, clearing your throat, deciding to introduce your two flabbergasted friends now that he gave a dramatic, albeit arrogant, introduction. "This is Jake and his wife, Hannah, they are my college friends," you managed to say with much more semblance of control than you expected.

"Ah…wow…umm…hey there, Steve…Captain, it's an honor," Jake sputtered. Hannah stood there shell-shocked.

Steve tilted his head and looked at you, the frown transforming into confusion. Then, his eyes widened in slow motion. "Oh." He opened his mouth to say something, one hand on his hip, while he pointed a finger at you and then at Jake and moved to Hannah.

"Right…" he let out a garbled chuckle that sounded more like a snort. Steve cleared his throat, scratching above his eyebrow, and then licked his lips. You could see the pink coating his cheek.

"'S great to meet you," he muttered, nodding at Jake and Hannah.

You looked at Steve, confused. You haven't seen this side of Steve, not in the few months of knowing him as Grant, your note-sharing next-door neighbor, nor after he revealed himself.

What followed was absolute pin-drop silence and a lot of staring.

"I...uh, yeah," you started, breaking the silence, flustered, trying to keep your composure.

Jake, bless him, quickly gathered his composure and Hannah's hand and picked up the duffel bag and the fallen phone, "Yeah, we should get going. We have the…" he frowned, staring outside, most likely racking his brain for a word.

"Yeah, the reservation," you helped, your own stomach flipping uneasily. Jake nodded, grateful for the input.

And when they were at the door, you followed them outside, leaving Steve standing in your living room. When they looked at you, shocked out of wits. "I'll explain later," you pleaded, feeling a headache forming. "Please just keep it confidential," you requested.

After quick hugs, you bid bye and walked back to your living room to deal with the Captain fine-ass America, no, scratch that. It was Captain fine-ass-most-likely-high America alright.

~

Steve stood, hands both on his hips, rigidly jutting out all the muscles and veins, and your brain tremored in frustration for more than one reason.

You strode towards him, confused.

"Are you drunk? Did you do drugs? I thought you couldn't get high," you blabbered at him.

"I am," he chuckled, solemnly nodding and grinning at you charmingly. "Asgardian Mead, Thor gifted."

Thor? Oh, the burly godman Thor?

"Thor? As in God of Thunder?" you asked, keeping your thirsty description to yourself.

"Yeah, got real high real fast, 's good stuff," Steve shrugged, and you could see him sway on his legs momentarily, "I think I should sit down," he told you, and before you knew it, he was on the floor, his back to the couch.

"Oh, fuck! Are you ok?" you gasped, kneeling before him. He shifted his large form and tried to straighten up, one leg spreading beside you while he folded his other leg, and he leaned forward, grasping your right hand in his large one and caressing the inside of your palm with his thumb. You choked on your breath at the pleasure shooting down your spine.

He nodded thoughtfully. When he looked up at you from under those perfect, down-right criminal, long eyelashes, not breaking his gaze, you felt your insides churn.

No. No. Distance. You need distance.

"I'll get you some water," you told him, breaking the silence. He blinked, letting your hand go reluctantly.

You took a moment to yourself as you scrambled away to fill the empty bottle. You could feel his sharp gaze scorching your form.

The past few days had been great. Spending time with Steve felt wholesome, and you really had come close, and this time, it wasn't merely through notes. You both spent insurmountable time together, cooking, eating and talking, lots and lots of talking.

Though you'd been trying to get a grip on your feelings for him, things were much simpler to handle when your mind was not buffering or your heart racing out of your chest. While your heart did its thing, spending more time with him had your mind in better control. You were finally able to grasp that Captain America, the living legend, was a simple man who was too sassy and stubborn for his own good. And he was willingly spending time with you. And that he was a sinfully gorgeous, walking green flag of a man.

Now that very man was sitting on your living room floor, likely out of his rocker, and high on burly man's mead.

When a few drops of water spilled on you, overflowing from the water, you shut off the valve and walked back to him, handing him the bottle. He eyed the bottle briefly before taking it and gulping down a few sips.

"What's going on?" you asked.

He looked up at you with a shy almost guilty-looking grin and pulled you closer, his grip firm on your forearm, and you landed ungracefully half on him and half on the floor, and despite his state, he steadied you.

Dear mother of sweet Duckburg! Those thighs felt rigid.

"Steve," you squealed, pushing yourself off him and moving away hastily, but his grip on you was unwavering. So, you settled for sitting closer and not straddling on his lap.

Even though he was sitting on the floor, slouched against the couch, and you knelt before him, Steve's broad frame still towered over you. The mere size difference was sending your mind unholy signals.

Nope. Don't go there. Don't you fucking go there!

"What the hell's going on?" You asked again, voicing your desperation and frustration.

"I saw him on your balcony. And I didn't... I didn't like it." Steve snickered, throwing a glance towards your balcony.

"Wh…what?"

"I thought you were going on a date with him," he finally said, more like hissed.

"You got drunk on some Thunder god's mead because you thought I was going on a date?" you asked, incredulous. 

Steve winced, shutting his eyes and nodded.

Your breath hitched. An overwhelming warmth bloomed in your chest, making you gulp, leaning more of your weight on one arm that was not held in a super soldier grip.

"Steve..." You didn't know what to say, your mind reeling. You pulled your hand free, and thankfully, he let you.

"I heard him talking about dinner reservations. I thought…" He trailed off, staring at the floor. "When I heard... I heard him," he muttered again, "And I thought, 'Why isn't it me?'"

You froze. "What?"

"I wanted it to be me," Steve bit out angrily, his sharp jaw clenching as his gaze turned distant. A hint of sadness lingered in his half-lidded blue eyes. Your heart skipped a beat.

Why was your rational brain not working? Oh, for god's sake, this was not Quantum Gravity. Steve was hinting at being jealous. He liked you, right?

You felt butterflies swarming your entire body. Warm, hungry butterflies, heating you up.

You scoffed at the absurdity of the situation. "Why?" You asked though you were grasping the why. "You're not making any sense," you said, trying to dismiss it as drunken rambling, but your heart wasn't listening.

No. Don't say it, Steve. No.

"I like you, like a whole lot," he murmured, pushing himself off the back of the couch and leaning closer to you. The heat of his breath on your cheek, his intoxicating smell captured your senses and pushed them into overdrive.

"No, 'S not true…" he whispered, his lips ghosting your cheek. He shook his head, chuckling, making you shudder at the sensation, and you stared at him in confusion.

What's not true? Was he making fun of you? Was this a prank? Your entire face heated up. Steve leaned even closer, his lips grazing your ear, and you bit your lip, your breaths coming out shallow. He cradled your jaw with his large palm and whispered the words you'd thought you'd never hear in any possible reality. "I love you." And he kissed your cheek, gently. The way he set your heart ablaze with that simple touch of his lips on your skin was unbelievable.

"Steve," you whispered, appalled and slightly worried, but he cut you off with a slight shake of his head.

How can you trust any of what he was saying? He was drunk.

You moved out of his grasp, beyond breathless, searching his eyes, your heart racing as you stared at him in disbelief.

"Your happy place…the one you told me about when I had that really bad nightmare. I want to be there with you, just you and me, I want to hold you close while we watch the rain together in our cozy home," he continued softly. Your insides twisted, and you sat there, wide-eyed, clinging to every word he spoke.

"I'll even learn to make the perfect coffee for you," he added with a small, dreamy smile. The vulnerability in his voice tugged painfully at your heart, and your eyes blurred with unshed tears.

"No, stop," you cried, unable to take any of this. What if tomorrow comes, and it will all shatter?

"But… it's the truth, doll. I love you, and I never felt anything like this in my long, painful existence," he said with conviction, wrapping your heart with more of his words.

You shook your head, unable to control your emotions, your tears flowing furiously.

"I'm sorry…I didn't want to make you cry," he soothed, wiping away your angry, helpless tears. His eyes blurred, sighing heavily, exhausted.

"Give me a chance, sweetheart, and I will prove to you how perfect we are."

You were only human, and when a man you had feelings for confessed to you, you couldn't help but break down before him. He gathered you in his arms, pulling you into his lap effortlessly, securely, and held you as you cried into his shoulder.

You didn't dare hug him back; you couldn't because you were scared to hope. Your arms stayed beside you as he soothed you so gently.

No. NO. Don't you dare believe all this? He was not really in his senses right now. What he drank was not even like human alcohol. Maybe it made you see things you didn't want to or say things you didn't intend to.

"You're sleeping this off." You muttered, clambering out of his hold. You cleared your throat, and composed yourself, "We'll talk about this later."

Steve nodded, a frown marring his perfect face. He managed to stand up and got onto your couch with little guidance. He flopped face-first onto it, legs hanging outside, mumbling incoherent words into the cushion.

You stared at the giant man, reeling from the shock of his confession. You stood there for a long moment, bewildered. Gathering some strength, you went to your bedroom and brought the blanket for him. You flung it over him carefully, tucking the blanket.

Eyes shut, Steve reached for your hand and gently grasped your shivering palm into his fist. You awkwardly crouched over him and tried to pull away, but he stubbornly held on. You saw the faint smile on his smushed face on the pillow. Sighing, you settled on the floor before the couch, letting him hold you and consume your thoughts.

"'S nice." He mumbled, getting comfortable and drifted off to sleep, his breathing slow and steady.

You freed your palm from his grip after almost an hour. You picked up the water bottle on the floor and downed it whole. You could use some mead right about now. Maybe not Asgardian, perhaps the human version.

A wave of shock coursed through you as the whole thing came rushing to you. Emotions still running high, you collapsed onto the chair beside the couch.

You felt happiness bubbling in your chest, thrashing in waves as your mind processed. You thought he was just being a good friend, but could you hope; hope that what he said was all true? If you were being honest, you knew how you felt. He was everything you ever wanted. Could you love him wholly? Captain America…Grant…Steve?

You had been trying so damn hard to make sense of your feelings, hoping, praying, that they would become a simple celebrity crush after he revealed he was Captain America. Denying the feelings was easier to save yourself from heartbreak, but now he throws this whole thing at you.

Maybe it was your fault. When he pushed that note underneath your door the first time, you should have knocked on his door instead of grinning like a fool and weaving into starting the whole note-sharing.

You looked at his sleepy form, his lips slightly parted as he slept peacefully, completely erasing peace from your life. You wanted to smack his stupidly perfect face.

A small smile tugged at your lips as you adjusted the blanket over him, which slipped off when he moved around.

"I'll be here in the morning," you whispered softly, brushing a stray lock of hair from his forehead.

And for the first time that night, when you laid your head on the pillow, as chaotic as it was, you allowed yourself to hope.

~

Steve woke up with a pounding headache. He hadn't been this drunk in a lifetime. It took him a few minutes to open his eyes, and he groaned in pain, sitting up on the soft couch. Not just soft, it smelled like you, soothing his senses a bit. Why did it smell like you in his apartment? Why did he smell like you? He wondered, dazed, and then he looked at the blanket.

He frantically looked around, confused, and the memories of the previous night came thrashing, jumbled.

Steve winced in disdain as he remembered the guy, the mead. Then…

"Son of a bitch," he paled as things shuffled in his head from last night, he confessed to you, and a small memory vividly stood out in his mind: "We'll talk about this later." You said with a tear-stricken face.

Shit. What had he done? He'd ruined it. Didn't he? Of course, she doesn't feel the same, he thought bitterly. Why can't he seem to understand the definition of patience with you?

His gut twisted with guilt, embarrassment, and anger at himself, at his lack of control. You were asleep in your room. He hastily got up, held the blanket close to him one last time, and left before you could see him.

The frustration of it all formed a storm in his chest.

~

When you woke up, Steve was long gone, and all you found was a perfectly folded blanket and a note:

Thank you for letting me stay. I'll see you around. – Steve.

And your heart did break reading the note. Of course, he didn't mean what he said. It was just the mead talking. You felt stupid for hoping.

For the first time ever, you despised the weekend. You couldn't simply face him or his presence, even if it was separated by a wall.

So, you did the only thing you could think of, get out and stay out as long as possible. You roamed through the city, weaving in and out of touristy spots, hoping for the noise of the crowd to temporarily drown out the tumultuous thoughts.

You checked your phone now and then, half-expecting it to ping with a message from Steve. Maybe he had an important mission or something that needed his attention, which would delay the inevitable conversation.

But the phone remained silent. No text. No call.

You wandered through the streets, walking aimlessly, letting the hum of the city distract you from the ache inside. But eventually, the noise inside you won, and the crowd wasn't helping you anymore.

When you finally parked your car in front of the building at 12:30 am, to your utter shock, you found Steve trudging up the steps to the apartment entrance. His body was stiff, and you could see the bruises and the blood. Your gaze caught his, and your eyes widened in shock. He seemed to not expect to see you.

And he was hurt badly. Shit. He was really on a mission.

"Steve?" you called, hurrying out of your car, forgetting about the whole ordeal while all you could think about was him being hurt. You briskly crossed the small road, calling out his name, but he didn't stop walking.

"Steve, wait!"

But hurt Steve Rogers was faster than you as you saw the elevator display show 5 by the time you reached the elevator doors.

"Why the hell are these so fast?" You muttered, the irony of your statement not lost on you. Just a few days ago, you cursed the same elevator for being too slow. You pressed the button again and again and again, annoyed at the elevator and him.

Once you reached your floor, you didn't hesitate to march to his apartment, heart pounding. You didn't know if it was frustration, concern, or a mix that fueled your actions.

You were just living your simple life before he decided to wreck it. You were doing just fine, dealing with your affection for him before he confessed.

His face was a blend of exhaustion and irritation when he opened the door after your incessant knocking.

He stood in his white undershirt, bloodied and bruised, and your heart tugged with concern.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, his voice clipped. 

You blinked, momentarily thrown off. "I…what? You're hurt, for one. Why the hell are you not at the hospital?" 

He leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed. "I'm fine." Then, in a quiet voice, he whispered, "Why do you care, neighbor?" His petulance was gnawing at your nerves, irking you and the question struck you harder than you expected, and your breath hitched.

"Steve," you said, your voice barely audible. "You are hurt." You stared at him, bewildered and angry.

He was hurt. How could he expect you not to?

Something shifted in his expression, exhaustion, maybe. Whatever it was, it broke the dam between you, and the words you'd been waiting to say spilled out. 

"What is wrong with you?" you snapped, throwing your hands up.

Fuck him and his attitude.

"You come to my apartment, drunk on some stupid mead, confess your feelings, leave me with a cryptic note, and then fucking vanish for the whole day! Do you not remember anything, neighbor?"

Steve's brows furrowed his expression hard. "Of course, I remember," he shot back. "I poured my damn heart out, made you cry, and it…it hurts."

The sheer audacity made your jaw drop. Your breath hitched. What? Your frown deepened, and the anger consumed you more.

Pointing a finger at him, "Hurts?” Your voice rose, incredulous. "Captain Rogers, you were drunk off your ass! You scared both my friends half to death, confessed out of nowhere, and then you expect me to what? Tell you how much I love you? I waited, Steve! I waited for you to come to your senses so we could talk like fucking adults!" you gritted the words out, feeling satisfied to throw it all on his face.

He stared at you, his confusion palpable, but his tone stayed defensive. "Wait a second! You were the one who said, 'We'll talk later,' like it didn't mean a damn thing!" 

"That's because you were fucking out of it, slurring your words!" you yelled back, your face heating, neck straining to have to look up. 

The two of you stood there, breathless, glaring at each other until realization struck Steve like a bolt. His posture stiffened, his blue eyes widening as if seeing the entire situation in a new light. 

"Hold on a damn second," he said, pinching the bridge of his nose, his voice quieter but no less intense. "You don't hate me?" 

"What?" you exclaimed, exasperation lacing your voice. "Where did you even get that from? And, why else would I be here, chasing you down after you practically ghosted me if I hated your dumbass?" 

"And... you just said you…" His words faltered as his gaze locked onto yours. 

The silence fell between you. You blinked, realization hitting you with equal force. 

I poured my heart to you, and you dismissed me! Steve's words came like lightning.

"Oh, God," you murmured, your face flaming. "So, you do umm...whatever you said, you meant it?" You asked.

Steve froze, his eyes wide, but then his face softened into the most breathtaking grin you'd ever seen. 

The tension broke like a snapped string, and Steve let out a low, almost disbelieving laugh, dragging a hand through his hair. "I thought you didn't feel the same," he muttered, his voice thick.

You stared at him, the sheer misunderstanding making you want to scream. "And I thought you regretted it!" 

He stepped closer, "The only thing I regret," he murmured, his eyes burning into yours, "Is touching that damn Asgardian mead. I swear I'm never going near that stuff again." 

A soft laugh bubbled out of you without volition. He wrapped an arm around your waist, hissing, and your focus shifted to his bruises. "Steve…" you sighed, heart racing while you felt a huge weight lift off of you.

His lips curved into a soft, tender smile as he leaned in, resting his forehead gently against yours, careful to avoid the gash on the left side of his face. His voice was low, filled with warmth. "For the record, I don't remember everything I said to you last night, but drunk or not... I love you."

Your breath hitched, but your hands found their way to his chest, clutching the fabric of his shirt. "Damnit, Steve!" you grumbled softly, affectionately, tears blurring your eyes.

His grin turned boyish as he pulled you into his living room before shutting the door just as the distant sound of Mrs. Reindell's door squeaked open.

~

Before he could take another step towards you, you pointed to the couch with a stern look. "We'll talk, but first, sit there. You're bleeding." 

Steve raised a brow at your tone, his lips twitching in amusement, but he complied, sinking onto the couch. You noticed the tension on his shoulders and how his body sagged as if he was barely holding himself together. 

"Where's your first aid kit?" you asked, scanning the room. 

"I'll get it," he offered, starting to rise. 

"Oh, no, you don't," you interrupted, placing a hand on his shoulder and pushing him back down. "Sit your ass down and stay. Now tell me where it is." 

He chuckled lowly, clearly enjoying your bossiness far too much. "Third shelf, left side, linen closet." 

You gave him one more warning look before heading down the hall. His apartment was neat. Too neat. Everything had its place, down to the neatly folded towels in the linen closet. You grabbed the first aid kit and returned, noticing Steve watching you with an amused expression. 

"What's so funny?" you asked, settling on the coffee table and setting the kit beside you. "Nothing," he said, leaning back against the couch, that maddening little smile still in place. 

You chuckled, pulling out antiseptic wipes and gauze. "Take your shirt off. I need to see the damage." Steve didn't say a word except for the slight tilt of his lips. You froze for half a second before narrowing your eyes. 

He grinned but obeyed, pulling his shirt over his head with ease. As much as you'd steeled yourself, the sight of him shirtless hit you like a truck. Muscles corded his chest and arms, marred only by the bruises and scrapes from wherever he got those from. You bit your lip without thinking, but when his gaze flicked to your face, you quickly composed yourself, focusing on the task. 

Steve was enjoying this far too much.

"What happened?" You started cleaning the wound on his chest, and then the gash on his face, your touch gentle.

He tilted his head to give you better access, his lips quirking into a soft smile. "Hazard of the job." 

"Doesn't mean you shouldn't care for yourself. Why are you not at the hospital? Does your insurance not cover tomfoolery?" you muttered, moving to inspect his arms.

"Smartass," Steve chuckled, shaking his head. You giggled.

"You're really not denying the lack of tomfoolery then?" You pointed, your fingers brushed over the bruises as you worked, but just as you went to recheck one of the wounds you'd cleaned, you realized it was already healing.

You blinked, looking up at him in surprise. Steve shrugged, his smile turning a little sheepish. "Serum." 

You frowned, "That doesn't discount you for not taking care of yourself, Steve," you retorted, shaking your head.

"Is it hurting anywhere else?" you asked, your eyes scanning him for more injuries. It was both strange and fascinating to watch the cuts and bruises fade before your eyes, his enhanced healing working its magic. Steve shook his head, silently watching with that intense look.

You packed up the first aid kit and stood to return it to its place, and Steve followed close behind you, his presence warm and steady. 

You paused, your hand resting on the linen closet door as you put away the kit.

When you turned, he stood so close, his expression unreadable, yet his eyes burned you, waiting. For a moment, neither of you moved, the air between you thick with tension. 

"I do love you if that didn't register in your super soldier brain," you said with a small smile.

Steve looked away, shaking his head. "You drive me crazy," he rasped, his fists clenched tightly at his sides. His bare chest rose and fell in heavy breaths. He shut his eyes, and the way his jaw ticked told you he was restraining.

Your own heart picked up.

When his eyes finally met yours, their heat was enough to steal the air from your lungs. It wasn't just a look; it was seeking permission and a promise, and you realized you'd gladly surrender to him.

He closed the distance in a single stride, crowding you against the wall beside the closet door. The solid surface met your back as his left hand planted firmly above your head.

He leaned in, his movements deliberate and intense, the tip of his nose grazing the side of your cheek. The contact was featherlight, but it sent a shiver down your spine, leaving you trembling beneath him. Your face and ears heated up, and you were sure you were blushing.

His rich and warm scent enveloped you, anchoring you to the moment simultaneously unraveling your composure.

Steve moved his right hand, his thumb traced your chin, and your lips parted, eyes closing shut. His palm cradled your jaw whole with a tenderness that contrasted with the sheer intensity radiating from him.

"You're so gorgeous, doll," he murmured, the words laced with such honesty you could cry.

Your breath hitched as your eyes met his darkened blues, turbulent and reverent. The weight of his gaze held you captive, your heart pounding in your chest.

Instinctively, you reached out, your hand hovering over the expanse of his chest, avoiding the gradually healing bruises. The heat of his skin radiated against your fingertips, the light dusting of chest hair teasing the expanse of your palm.

He caught your wrist in his larger hand, his grip firm yet gentle. The sheer size of his palm dwarfed your entire forearm, his thumb brushing slow circles over the delicate skin of your wrist, drawing a whimper from you. Then, carefully, he guided your hand to rest fully against his chest, pressing it over his heart.

"Feel that?" he whispered, his voice low and rough, placing a butterfly kiss on your forehead, before tilting his head to rest his forehead against yours. Underneath the warmth of his muscular chest, his heartbeat thundered beneath your palm, erratic and unguarded.

"You do that to me." He murmured, his lips hovered so close to yours that you could feel the warmth of his breath, his words stirring the air between you. Your mouth went dry, and you licked your lips, and his gaze moved to them.

His nose flared as he mimicked you, licking his own lips. Before you could lean in, he was moving. His lips touched yours gently first, and he let out a groan, fueling you with such intensity, burning you with a simple touch.

You really did that to him. That thought unraveled you, and you eagerly moved onto your tiptoes, hands finding purchase in his soft blonde locks. His hands moved to the side of your waist, and he pulled you closer and straightened up, lifting you off the ground, holding you by his one arm wrapped around your waist, and he ran the other hand down the back of your thigh, and you wound your legs around him. Your body pressed into his delectably.

He took your mouth into another kiss, a low rumble reverberating from his chest as he pinned you to the wall, one arm carding through your hair as he held you firm.

"You taste so good," he murmured, breaking the kiss momentarily before kissing you again passionately. Steve's tactile pants couldn't hide his arousal as he hardened against your stomach.

Your pussy fluttered, and you moaned into his mouth, breathless and completely needy, addicted to everything that was him.

The way he nipped your lips and pushed his tongue against you felt unreal. You never had a kiss that good. Never.

Steve pulled apart slightly, allowing you both to breathe. His breath came out in spurts, heating up your skin, and you searched his gaze expectantly, the hazy and happy grin on his face etched in your core memory.

"Steve," you whispered, rubbing your thumb against his lower lip, and he shivered.

"Not done with you," he rasped, his hand lifting you up to keep you at the level to his mouth and he kissed you with more vigor and fuck, you were completely drenched.

You both parted from the kiss again, breathless, and he leaned into your neck, nipping the skin at your throat and your head fell back, arching, giving him access while your legs tightened around him. Steve placed a few wet kisses along the expanse of your neck before adjusting you in his arms, his one hand winding around your back and rubbing the side of your boob while his other hand moved to hold your ass as he squeezed it tightly, surprising you, and you felt his hardness against your clothed pussy.

"Holy shit!" Your cry synced with his loud grunt when he rocked against you. His forehead rested against yours, "Eyes on me," he demanded, and you obeyed.

"Will you let me love you? Every inch of you?" He asked softly, reverently, and when you nodded, reciprocating with a roll of your hips, his jaw clenched, teeth gritting as he thrust against you with a bit more force, and you were reaching your high. Oh, god!

"Words, please," it was really funny how he could be sweet and sinful all at once. "Yes…but don't fucking stop, Steve, I'm so close," you confessed unashamed, unbothered, breath hitching as he rocked you onto him. Your pussy clenched around nothing, and the friction felt just perfect.

"That mouth," he chuckled darkly, lowering his head into the crook of your neck as he nipped your skin. You moaned.

Steve moved up, looking at you for a beat long when he thrusted with a bit more force and saw your lips part, letting out a breathless cry. He groaned, taking your lower lip between his lips and sucking on it gently, and his grip around your ass tightened as he rolled his hips. You felt the heat of his touch, and the pleasure consumed you all at once. You cried out loudly, body arching as you gripped his shoulders.

Steve didn't slow down, though, "God, your smell…" He grunted and sped up, thrusting incessantly. His hands grazed your hardened nipples over your bra and squeezed. Your pussy clenched at the new sensation he was evoking while still dry-humping against you. Not so dry because you were sure you were soaking through your leggings.

His hand moved to cup your ass again, squeezing tightly, and you shivered, succumbing to another orgasm, falling into his arms, whispering, crying his name.

"Fucking perfect…" he cursed, breath hitched as he nipped your jaw and moved to ear. "I love you," he whispered, placing a kiss on your earlobe, his sharp nose caressing down your neck, his mouth placing kisses down the path, and you trembled in his arms.

His hand moved to your tit, and he squeezed gently at first, and when you moaned lewdly, he palmed it with a bit more pressure, repeating the same on the other one.

You had no idea when he carried you to the bedroom and placed you gently on the neatly made bed, and you leaned on your elbows, moving back to make space for him on the Queen bed. He switched on the table lamp by the bed, and that was when you saw the dark blue mark on the lower part of his back that you had missed earlier.

"Steve," you called out in concern. Shit! What were you doing? He was hurt and still healing.

"Wait…" you started, unable to formulate a bloody sentence because you were fucking buzzed from the orgasmic high, and Steve stiffened, his muscles clenched visibly as he turned to you, looking worried.

"Did I hurt you?" He asked you in a soft, concerned voice.

"No…" you smacked yourself. "No…no…no…that was absolutely best," you chuckled. Steve relaxed his stance, moving closer.

Your gaze dropped to his body. "You're hurt, we should…maybe stop… some medicine…" you were cut off. Steve quickly climbed onto the bed, straddling your thighs and taking your lips into another deep, languid kiss, consuming your doubts and thoughts. You let yourself fall back on the mattress, letting your weight settle completely.

Steve broke the kiss to murmur against your lips, "Right now, I need you more than anything else. My bruises will heal soon, I promise," he whispered, leaning down to kiss you again tenderly, and your idea to wait it out evaporated from your brain when his heated kisses sizzled your skin.

"Can I remove these?" he asked, nuzzling your throat, his fingers dipped on the side of your pants just at your hip bone. Steve's touch felt hot on your skin, and not enough; they were so close to your pussy.

"Please," you begged, and you helped him remove your pants along with your panties. And when he dragged them down, you removed your shirt.

When you moved to remove your bra, his hands stopped you, and he turned you onto your stomach before pressing his palm on your back, "So soft," he whispered, moving forward to place a tiny kiss on your shoulder and trying to undo the clasp, but he wasn't able to get it out.

When you looked over your shoulder, watching him struggle, you giggled. The dexterous Captain America was struggling with a bra strap. He rolled his eyes and plucked it again. It tore away to your utter shock, "Sorry," he said, removing the bra and simultaneously turning you onto your back.

"Are you, though?" you asked shyly as he pulled your bra completely,

leaving you completely naked for him. The coolness of the room suddenly hits you, sending goosebumps all over your body. Your nipples hardened even more.

Steve sat back on his knees, straddling your thighs, and he let out a groan lazily, watching every inch of your skin.

"No, I'm not, far from it," he winked, dazed in lustful haze.

Steve splayed his large palm on your upper left thigh and squeezed it, making you clench in need.  

"So pretty, like a painting," he whispered, taking your hand and kissing the inside of your palm, and you whimpered as his fingers caressed your wet folds. His thumb circled the nub. "Steve," you cried.

"Yes?" He asked, looking up at you, so fucking innocently, searching.

"Stop teasing," you moaned, earning a whimper from him when your own hand reached down to caress him over his pants. Steve let out a growl, moaning loudly, his head thrown back as he cupped your pussy firmly, and your grip on him tightened involuntarily, and you moaned in delight, your legs wiggling. You moved to sit, effectively pushing him slightly.

"You're overdressed," you said urgently, needy hands moving to his pants.

"Am I?" he chuckled, voice raspy, he moved to hold your tit, squeezing your waist and you moaned.

Steve moved to take your lips in a searing kiss. Quickly moving into a plank position, he efficiently removed his pants without breaking the kiss, discarding his pants with a single hand.

That was pussy flutteringly impressive.

You pulled apart from the kiss and dragged down his boxers, and Steve kicked them away and the sight of him completely naked made you moan, and you trembled beneath him; his sheer strength made you gasp.

Fucking Adonis!

Steve looked at you, expectant and unsure.

"You're so beautiful," you told him in awe, eyes trailing the length of him. He grinned at you happily.

You wanted to touch him, taste him, take him in your mouth, feel him fall apart.

He was girthy, long and beautiful.  "Can I?" you asked, and he nodded, slightly shy at the first touch, "Son of a bitch," he cursed falling over you. He quickly steadied himself. Your small hand wrapped near the tip as you pumped, smearing his precum and rubbing it along, and he groaned into your shoulder, sinking his teeth into your skin, not too hard but enough to leave your mind screaming in pleasure.

When you gestured your intentions of getting on your knees, Steve understood, but he shook his head and whispered against your mouth, "Later. I need to feel you, please," he gritted out, and you nodded but didn't stop rubbing him. Steve, however, moved your hand, bringing it back, still holding himself in that plank position.

Fuck, he was so strong. He moved around lithely.

You simply were incapable of saying a word when he rubbed his fingers so delightfully over your folds, evoking pleasure. He pulled your other hand, clutching at the sheet desperately entwined his large fingers with yours, and held it beside your head. He pushed a finger gently, and you cried, voice hitching as he slowly pushed it to his second knuckle. He pumped it inside you, and when you begged him to fill you up, Steve growled.

"So beautiful," he groaned, placing a kiss on your cleavage before kissing the swell of your left boob before he sucked on it.

You waited impatiently as he lined up at your entrance. Steve stilled, though, looking at you with concern. "What's wrong?" you asked. Steve leaned against your forehead, sighing heavily, jaw slightly clenching. "I do not have any protection," he said. It took you a hot moment. Right! Condom.

"Steve…umm… I'm clean, on birth control…if that…I haven't been with anyone in a while if that's…" you felt absolutely stupid blabbering. Quickly composing, you took a deep breath, not focusing on his bare cock against your pussy. You looked up at him, "We don't need to do this now…" but Steve frowned, cutting you off and claiming your lips in a quick kiss.

"No, that's not what I want. If you are okay, I don't mind. I'll pull it out, I promise. I…I haven't been with anyone. My medical is all clear, too," Steve added, his cheeks flushed a little more.

You smiled, nodding, looking up at him.

"Stop me if it's too much," his soft command registered through the haze of desire when he slotted himself at the entrance, pushing the tip inside. Your body went rigid at the feel.

"FUCKING HELL," he yelled, clutching the pillow in a death grip. "You okay?" he managed to say, breathless, the unruly lock of hair falling onto his forehead, making him even more perfect. You nodded, trying to breathe.

"Move…" you mouthed inaudibly, and he pushed a little more. You moved your hands to his pert ass, encouraging him to push in more because, dear god, you were incapable of getting a word out of your mouth.

Thankfully, he was reading every tiny expression on your face, and he rocked a couple of times before fully thrusting inside. He stilled, mouth parted, head thrown back, his eyes shut tightly for a second before he let out a loud groan. Your own eyes pinched close. The sudden intrusion and his mere size felt slightly uncomfortable and overwhelming.

"Too much?" he managed to ask you despite looking like he could rail you onto the mattress. He stilled, waiting.

You took a few steady breaths. "Move," you whispered, and he rocked experimentally a couple of times. And the unease of being so full faded as you clenched around him needily. The pleasant ache in your belly burgeoned, spiraling, building to thrash you into an all-consuming orgasm.

Your head thrashed onto the pillow as you arched, hands moving carefully to clutch his shoulders, avoiding the bruises.

"Sweetheart, can you look at me," he rasped, and your heart tugged at his plea. You mustered your courage and opened your eyes, which were ready to roll into the back of your head. His face contorted in pleasure as his thrusts turned languid, and he leaned down, moving close to your lips.

"Such a good girl," he said, making your breath hitch and your pussy clenched around him tightly. "Nngh fuck," he chuckled.

"Steve," you moaned, winding your hands around him as you pulled him closer. When he searched your eyes with concern, you bit your lip when he stilled.

"I can take it, Captain. You don't have to worry. I'll stop if it's too much. Okay?" you managed to say between heavy breaths. His jaw clenched, his hands moved to the back of your right thigh, tapping, and you wound your legs around him, the angle making you both moan loudly. You tried to twist your foot away from the bruise you remembered on his lower back.

Steve seemed to realize your plight. "Shit, doll, don't worry, just…hold on tight," he grunted, and you did. He moved your wrists above onto the pillow and held them there with his right hand while his left hand moved to fondle your tits.

You moaned when he rolled his hips into you, and he didn't hold back, rutting into you with such force that if he wasn't holding you down, you would have moved up and off the bed.

"Steve…fuck…fuck…," his every thrust hit the spot that had you seeing stars. When he moved his hand away from the tit to your lips, you captured his thumb in your mouth, rolling your tongue and sucking on it, moaning. Steve's breath hitched; his hand tightened on your wrists while he fucked you into the mattress.

The pleasure built inside your tummy, and your lips parted. He moved his finger out of your mouth, and you cried at the sensation.

"Yes, fuck, you're squeezing me so good," he gasped, and your orgasm overtook every fucking sense in your body. Steve's hips stuttered against your hips, and when you looked at him and smiled giddily, he grinned, sitting up on the bed straight and carrying you up with him. You sat in his lap with him still nestled inside you so delectably. The new angle had you clenching on him tightly.

His hands moved to clutch your neck, and he pivoted you closer as he claimed your mouth for another kiss. It was sloppy, rough, and you fucking loved it. You tried to move on his dick, and he moaned into your mouth.

"Perfect for me," he sighed greedily, pulling you in for another kiss and thrusting up into you, and you squealed as he hit your cervix deeper. He stilled, checking on you. "All good," you managed to squeak, and he nodded, thrusting up.

"Fuck fuck fuck… don't stop," you chanted as you felt yourself careen and your orgasm consumed you. His veiny cock dipped into you just right as he moaned lewdly into your ear, not stopping his movement. Steve waited till he saw you blink at him, and just as you came down from your high, he pushed you onto your back, folding your legs at the knees, and pushed them close to your chest and rocked into you. You watched in awe as he flushed red, a sheen of sweat covering his brow, and his beautiful gaze held yours.

"I'm…"

"Let go," you nodded, and his biceps flexed, and he growled your name loudly before he came.

Fuck, that's a lot of cum. Probably a super soldier thing, you thought, moaning in delight as you felt the delicious friction of his cock splaying his cum on your pussy.

He huffed, breathing heavily, his eyes closed, a small smile playing on his lips as he leaned down and placed an open-mouthed kiss, his breath heavy on your mouth. When he came down from his high, he rested his forehead against yours.

"Are you okay?" he asked, blue eyes searching yours, his voice softer, raspier.

You chuckled, the sound light and full of warmth. "Okay is an understatement," you said, grinning.

His lips curved into a smug smile as he kissed your forehead softly.

"And you?" you asked, tilting your head slightly.

"I feel like…" He sighed happily, placing a lingering kiss on your neck. "I've died and gone to heaven," he murmured, then laughed softly, falling onto his back, and pulled you onto him, not bothered by the mess you were both making.

"I love you," he said against your lips, his voice low and reverent.

"I love you," you whispered, the words carrying all the affection you felt for him. He chuckled, his chest vibrating against yours, before capturing your lips in another kiss.

~

Much later, you both lay cuddled after he helped you clean up. Steve put you in his t-shirt while he was in his boxers. He was still hard as a rock, and you had tried to help him out, but he shook his head, saying he needed to hold you close first, and you needed some rest. As the room grew quieter, he spoke softly. "You know, I was so worried I would mess it up."

"Mess it up?" you asked, your curiosity piqued.

"With you… um, sex…" he said, his voice uncertain.

"Sex?" you repeated, resting your chin upon his bare chest. The lights were off, casting the room into a beautiful cozy ambience.

He looked at you, his arms instinctively pulling you closer. "I… I've never done that before…" he admitted, his voice tinged with vulnerability.

"Sex?" you repeated, sitting up slightly and propping yourself on his chest to look at him. Your brows shot up in surprise, the faint glow of the streetlights illuminating your wide-eyed expression. "Wait, that was your first time?"

He gave you a sheepish shrug. "Uh… yeah," he said, avoiding your gaze.

"As in, after thawing?" you asked curiously. He snorted, clearing his throat and throwing you a deadpan look.

"Oh, god, like ever?" Your stunned squeak came out garbled. "Doll," he groaned, smushing his face in the crook of your neck.

You blinked, processing his words before a smile tugged at your lips.

"Hold on." You gestured dramatically but were not able to say anything.

You couldn't hold back the giggle bubbling up in your chest.

"Oh my God, it's an honor to serve under you, Captain!" you teased, your grin downright wicked now.

"Hey!" he cut you off, his hands flying to your waist as he flipped you onto your back, pinning you beneath him. The sudden movement made you squeal, laughter spilling out of you.

"Keep laughing, and I'll show you just how much of a quick learner I am and am bloody efficient," he said, his voice low and playful, the heat in his eyes making your laughter catch in your throat.

Your giggles subsided into breathless chuckles as you reached up to trace his jawline. "I'm not laughing at you," you said softly, though the smile on your lips remained. "I'm just… shocked. I mean, that was incredible. You were incredible."

He relaxed at your words, leaning down to nuzzle your neck. "I was worried…"

"Oh, I noticed," you teased lightly, earning a groan from him. "But honestly? That just makes it even sweeter. And kind of… hot," you admitted, your voice dropping to a whisper.

"Yeah?" he asked, his lips brushing your collarbone now.

"Yeah," you replied, threading your fingers through his hair. "But, uh, just to clarify…" You smirked. "You're not planning on being a one-hit wonder, are you?"

The laughter that rumbled out of him was low and infectious as he leaned back to look at you, his blue eyes sparkling warmly. "My darling Fiore," he murmured, his voice dripping with mischief. "I can do this all day."

There there...HIS FIORE IS DONE! YAYYY!

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[raevpng]

only you (pt. 2)

paige bueckers x azzi fudd

masterlist

pt. 1

summary: everyone tunes in when they share a court — paige bueckers and azzi fudd, former team mates, once golden duo, turned wnba rivals. they were the perfect match on court, and no one could deny it. but no one knows what goes on under the surface of competition and rivalry, not even them.

a/n: hey lovelies! in honour of dallas’ win today here’s the second chapter :) idk if i like this but ill edit it when im awake 😭 as always lmk what u think and enjoy <3

there’s a different kind of buzz that you get only after a game is won.

there’s a lazy satisfaction that thrums under your skin, a kind of heavy warmth that settles in your chest and refuses to leave. it’s the payoff. the reward. every late-night gym session, every clean meal, every quiet hour of mental prep finally cashing out into a win. you feel it in your pulse. you feel it in your bones.

and yeah, a little ego boost too.

cause she fucking did it.

azzi fudd beat paige bueckers.

and sure, it wasn’t the first time. definitely wouldn’t be the last. but still. a win’s a win.

and this one? buzzer beater, all eyes watching, three-pointer in her face?

that one deserves a celebration.

and if there’s anything she does well, it’s celebrate.

–

the club was full of bodies, almost as if the world wanted to celebrate with them. the atmosphere was electric, thick with heat and light and bass. bodies press against one another under neon strobes, laughter spilling out over pounding music. drinks are flowing, her teammates were going wild, limbs flailing, voices hoarse from the win and whatever was poured in their shots.

pure chaos, but god she loves it.

she giggled as her teammates reenacted her winning shot, heart warming at how silly her friends were and at the compliments and praises thrown her way.

azzi sat on the high stool near the bar, some fruity vodka in hand, ice clinking softly against the glass as she giggled at some stupid drunken story. her cheeks were flushed from the alcohol or from laughter maybe, braids loosely flowing down her shoulders, cropped top clinging from the warmth of the crowd. she’s loose in a way she rarely allows herself, spine relaxed, shoulders dropped, that tiny smile pulling at her mouth that no one but her closest people ever really gets to see.

aaliyah was perched next to her, long legs crossed as she kept an eye on her best friend while simultaneously getting shit-faced. "this how we party after a win?" she shouts over the music, grinning.

azzi just lifts her glass with a smirk, tilting her head. "damn right."

but then it happens.

just slightly. like a cold breeze slipping in through a cracked door.

somewhere between a sip and a laugh, the energy in the room shifts. subtle – not something you’d notice if you weren’t paying attention.

aaliyah catches it first. her eyes scan the entrance and sure enough, there she is.

standing there, black tee, necklace glinting, arms crossed with a scowl already carved into her face – paige bueckers.

paige and her best friends.

"fucking hell," aaliyah mutters.

azzi doesn’t see her yet. too tipsy, too wrapped up in the buzz of her own victory.

“uh az, wanna get another drink?” aaliyah elbowed her best friend, sensing that whatever the fuck happened on that court was definitely gonna start something if she didn’t do some sort of damage control.

azzi, bless her soul didn’t seem to notice the commotion that they brought in just by appearing.

“hell yeah!” azzi exclaimed, visibly tipsy in the dazed look in her eyes and the heaviness present in her movements.

on the other side of the club, kayla and nika had hurriedly gone to order their first round of drinks, leaving paige to settle in on a booth.

paige doesn't sit so much as she drops. her body is stiff, her jaw tight. she doesn't join in on the laughter. she doesn't look anywhere except across the room.

"oh, you gotta be fucking kidding me," paige mutters, her voice dry, more to herself than anyone else. her friends are laughing and talking around her, but she’s still as stone, eyes locked on the girl at the bar.

because of course she’s here.

because of course she looks like that.

azzi feels it before she sees it.

sees her.

azzi’s head turns. her eyes land on the paige’s.

and whatever it is, maybe the alcohol in pulsing through her veins, or maybe just pure hatred and pettiness. she scoffed before breaking the eye contact.

you wanna look?

go ahead, look.

she let her fingers run through her hair, collecting them on one side to show the expanse of her neck. she moves slowly, as if she knows she has an audience, and leans forward to start a conversation with the guy next to her, laughing softly at his jokes.

it’s calculated. measured. sharp-edged.

paige doesn’t move from her spot, arms still folded tight over her chest, jaw clenched. she watches azzi lean back, lets her head tip, exposes her throat to the crowd and the lights and the man beside her.

it makes something in paige’s chest clench.

because paige? she knows the difference between real and fake. and this? this is azzi performing. dancing. flaunting. and she hates how easily she falls into that rhythm. how effortlessly she makes herself look untouchable.

she knows that she’s moving different now.

more exaggerated. more fluid. hips swinging just a little wider. hands brushing against shoulders, fingers playing with straws in drinks.

she’s performing.

and as some guy with a smirk too deep and hands too brave neared, azzi embraced it. she let him get close, let herself smile in the way she knew reeled others, let her arm rest on his shoulder as his putrid cologne filled her nose.

she was performing, for who – she didn’t know. didn’t want to.

but this feeling? the feeling of paige’s eyes burning on her back and the guy in front of her looking at her almost in a breathless kind of worship?

she hated how much she adored it.

aaliyah watches the whole thing with narrowed eyes, taking another sip of her drink.

she and azzi had been close during their time at uconn. they remained close when she got drafted to mystics first but ultimately got the closest when azzi got drafted to the same team. and yeah, she saw what everyone else saw – that paige and azzi had been so close to mysteriously never speak again.

but she was observant, always was and always will be. and she recognised the pattern of azzi’s excuses and sudden need to leave everytime paige’s name was even mentioned. yeah, it was probably best to stay clear. she had chalked it up to best friend’s drifting, maybe even a fight.

but now? as she sat there watching azzi move her hips against a guy while paige drilled holes at the back of her head?

she wasn’t too sure.

still, azzi was her best friend. and the guy was very quickly becoming bold and handsy.

she walks over to the younger, voice low in azzi’s ear. “you good?”

“i’m great,” azzi says, a little too fast.

aaliyah lifts a brow. “uh huh.”

but azzi is already back to it, swaying into the beat, laughing at something the guy next to her says, fingers tugging playfully at his collar.

and paige?

she hasn’t moved. she still sat stiffly across the room as her friends drank up and flirted with their own guys perched next to them.

and aaliyah didn’t know whether to laugh or be scared at the lack of emotion in her former teammate’s eyes.

the bass gets heavier. the drinks flow faster. the night starts to blur around the edges. and azzi is buzzing.

her head tips back, mouth open in a laugh, that guy’s hand on her waist now. and she lets him. not because she wants to, but because someone’s watching. she can feel the stare on her like a second skin.

but then the guy shifts.

his hand moves a little lower. he leans in too close, breath hot and heavy against her neck. he says something she doesn’t catch, something that makes her face shift in a flash.

aaliyah sees it.

stands up to protest.

and then suddenly.

“yo.”

paige’s voice cuts through the music like a blade. the music doesn’t stop, but it feels like it does. feels like everyone halted. feels like all the air in the room got sucked out.

azzi’s eyes snap up just as paige steps between them, arm sliding out in one clean, practiced motion, pushing the guy’s chest back.

“back off.”

the guy blinks, surprised. then scoffs. “you serious?”

“i said back off,” paige repeats, firmer. she doesn’t even look at him. her eyes are on azzi.

azzi’s breath stutters.

the guy backs up, muttering something under his breath and disappearing into the crowd. paige doesn’t move. doesn’t drop her arm.

“you good?” she asks, voice tight. like she hates even having to say it.

azzi stares at her.

then her expression changes.

eyes harden. lips part. a slow scoff leaves her chest as she takes a step forward — not toward her, but past her — shoulder brushing paige’s arm in a hard, deliberate shove.

“don’t fucking touch me,” she mutters.

paige flinches like she’s been slapped.

azzi keeps walking. doesn’t stop, doesn’t look back. disappears into the crowd, body tense, spine stiff, like the only thing keeping her upright is her rage.

aaliyah stands frozen a few feet away, mouth parted, drink forgotten in her hand.

because damn.

that wasn’t nothing.

that was history unfolding.

–

“paige, you good? what was that?”

paige doesn’t move.

not even when the music swells again, not when the guy disappears into the dark, not even when azzi walks away without looking back.

she just stands there.

chest rising, fists clenched, heart still hammering from whatever the hell just happened.

“paige.”

finally, kayla grabs her shoulder, snapping her out of it.

“what the hell was that about?” her voice is sharp, confused but not surprised. “you looked damn ready to fight that guy.”

“nothing.” paige mutters, eyes now fixed on some random spot on the wall, anywhere but where azzi had just been. “he was being a dick,”

“sure,” kayla says, narrowing her eyes. “but you don’t know him. hell, i thought you didn’t know her that well?”

“don’t need to.”

“be serious. you don’t get in guys’ faces like that for strangers.”

that gets paige’s attention.

her head jerks toward kayla. “she isn’t-” she stops. “it wasn’t a big deal.”

kayla’s brows lift. “uh-huh.”

the rest of the crew starts to gather near the exit, talking about calling it a night. a few throw glances paige’s way — some confused, some amused — but no one says anything out loud. not yet.

someone makes a joke about how paige’s ‘hero complex’ is back.

“you get one buzzer-beater hit on you and you’re back to being in your feelings,” someone teases with a laugh.

paige doesn’t laugh.

she grabs her jacket off the back of the booth and shrugs it on with a grunt, brushing past them toward the door.

“fuck her,” she mumbles under her breath. “bitch acts like she didn’t- whatever.”

“what’d you say?” kayla asks from behind, trying to catch up.

“nothing,” paige mutters again, brushing her fingers through her ponytail as they step out into the cold night air.

the temperature hits instantly — sharp, biting. the kind of cold that finds its way past clothes and into bone. it’s late. the street is mostly empty, cars rolling past slow, bass from the club muffled behind the door now swinging shut.

her friends start peeling off. one calling an uber, two others heading toward their parked car down the block.

paige walks toward hers, head low, keys already in her hand.

until she sees her.

azzi.

standing alone near the curb, phone in hand, thumb swiping across the screen, teeth biting into her bottom lip like she’s too tired to be pissed but too pissed to let it show.

and paige pretends she doesn’t stare at the action for a second too long.

she’s wearing a tiny leather jacket that’s clearly not built for this weather, arms wrapped around herself, shoulders tense. her breath clouds the air in front of her. she looks miserable.

walk away paige. you’ve done enough bullshit for one night

“you waiting for a ride or hoping the cold finishes you off first?” paige calls out.

damn it.

azzi doesn’t even look up. she knows that voice. “oh, fuck off.”

“you’re welcome,” paige mutters, already stepping closer.

azzi sighs and finally lifts her head. “you stupid? i said, fuck off.”

“yeah, you did,” paige says, her voice dripping with sarcasm, eyes flicking to the street. “and yet, still no ride.”

“my uber’s coming.”

“your phone’s dead.”

“lili’s picking me up”

azzi glares. paige stays.

she mutters something under her breath that paige can’t catch.

paige steps closer, standing just a little too near to be comfortable. azzi physically flinches.

“don’t be stubborn. get in. i’ll drive you.”

azzi scoffs full on, like it physically disgusted her. “i’d genuinely rather die in this cold than get in the car with you.”

“great,” paige says dryly, stepping around her and opening the passenger door anyway. “you can freeze your ass off and die dramatically. or you can take a ten-minute drive in silence.”

azzi doesn’t move.

“azzi fudd, age twenty-seven, dies outside bar because she’s fucking stupid.”

“kill yourself.” azzi rolled her eyes, standing up to walk away.

paige grabs her arm, halting her actions.

“fine, sorry. i’ll shut up. i’ll drive, won’t even look at you.”

“paige bueckers apologizing? that’s new.” azzi scoffed, the words bringing a sharp pain to the blonde’s chest.

“az.”

the nickname slips out before she can stop it.

azzi’s eyes flash.

yet she doesn’t yell, doesn’t roll her eyes.

instead, she exhales.

long. slow. tired.

“don’t call me that.”

but she climbs into the passenger seat without another word, slamming the door a little harder than necessary.

paige rolls her eyes, walks around, starts the car.

the heater kicks in with a low hum, and they sit in silence, headlights cutting through the empty road ahead.

no questions on where to go, what street to pull into.

for a moment, the only sound is the gentle drum of azzi’s fingers on her knee.

paige sneaks a glance.

azzi’s staring out the window. her lashes are heavy. her expression unreadable.

paige’s knuckles tighten on the wheel.

“seatbelt,” she mutters.

azzi clicks it in without a word.

and they drive.

not a sound exchanged. not a glance shared. just the two of them and the hum of the engine.

because that’s what they are now.

and when they pull up in front of azzi’s apartment, she unbuckles the seatbelt and leaves with a slam of the door.

paige just drives.

pretends like it didn’t bother her.

–

the door clicks shut behind her with a sound too loud for her apartment.

the silence that greets her is deafening — a stark contrast to the pounding music and heat of the club. here, everything is still. too still. her boots echo across the hardwood as she walks further in.

azzi sighs, ignoring the echo in the quiet space around her as she tries to ground herself. the thoughts were too loud, the mess in her head were too messy, her heartbeat in her ears doing nothing to ground her.

warm yellow light spills across the room, as she turned on a lamp. soft and muted, catching on framed photos and trophies and jerseys. reminders. shadows of all the versions of her that used to exist.

god, she wishes life was still that simple.

she walks past a framed photo of the uconn team — paige’s senior year, azzi under her arm as she looked at her like she hung the stars.

back when she still cared.

she slams it face down as she walks by, fishing out her phone as she plops shakily down her couch. jacket thrown hastily over the other side, boots dropped on the floor beside her. she ignored the nagging in her head to clean. couldn’t care enough to actually get up.

her shoulders drop as she sits on the edge of the couch, eyes fixed on nothing, hands idle in her lap.

everything catches up to her all at once.

the win. the shots. the heat. the moment she turned her head and saw her.

her chest feels too tight.

and fuck, she hates that. hates her.

because it should’ve been over. it was over. they made sure of that.

she leans forward, elbows to knees, hands covering her face.

fuck, azzi. get it together.

she groans, dropping her head lower into her hands, letting her fingers push against her scalp like she can physically shove the memories out.

and without thinking, without really deciding, she grabs her phone from her purse, screen lighting up her tired face, and taps the contact already burned into muscle memory.

it barely rings three times before she picks up, grogginess evident in her voice.

“azzi? you okay?”

azzi swallows. her voice is small. “caroline, can you talk?”

there was only the sound of sheets rustling for a beat, caroline sitting up azzi assumes.

“yeah always, what’s wrong?”

azzi presses her lips together, doesn’t know where to start. doesn’t even really want to talk about it. but something in her chest is too full, and she knows if she doesn’t let a little bit of it out, it’ll tear her open.

“i saw her tonight,” she says finally.

caroline doesn’t ask who. doesn’t need to.

“at the club,” azzi adds, eyes glued to the floor. “she was there. with her friends. and i was just- i don’t even know, i was fine, i was celebrating and then suddenly she’s-” her voice cracks. “she was right beside me pushing off some guy.”

silence.

“and i don’t know what’s wrong with me because i shouldn’t care, right?” azzi continues, “this is some stupid shit that happened – what? five years ago?”

caroline only hums, silent but clearly listening.

“and she means nothing to me now. she does.”

“az…”

“no really. i don’t give a shift about her, or what she does, or who she thinks she is.”

“okay.” caroline says softly, almost like a parent gently parenting a child.

azzi leans back on the couch, lets her head fall against the cushion. she blinks hard at the ceiling, like if she stares long enough, the confusion might evaporate.

“azzi, i need you to be honest. do you think she misses you?”

the second the words left her mouth, azzi couldn’t stop the bark of laughter from escaping her lips.

“hell no.”

“azzi.”

“no, caroline. she hates me. probably just wanted to get back at me for beating her tonight.”

caroline doesn’t say anything.

“whatever,” azzi mutters, suddenly tired of the whole conversation. “i don’t care what she feels.”

“you sure?”

azzi only hums, drawing a sigh from her friend.

“well, you know i’m always here for whatever you need, right?”

azzi softens at the words, feeling like she can finally breathe for the first time for the night. “yeah, thanks caroline. for everything.”

“always.”

and then she ends the call.

the screen goes black again. her reflection stares back — eyes glassy, jaw tight.

she sinks further into the couch cushions, lets the silence take her again.

you’re better than this, she thought to herself.

“i’m not doing this shit again.” she said out loud, standing up to walk to her bedroom almost with a new burst of energy.

cause azzi was better than paige. she has to be.

and as she changes to her favourite tee and boxers, shuts the light and lets herself drift. lets herself forget, lets herself rest.

and as she drifts to sleep, thoughts finally quieting, she doesn’t notice the new notification lighting up her phone.

paige bueckers has started to follow you.

[wings-of-ink]

Plans, Updates and News!

The Future (and why that's a little scary)

Hello everyone! I hope you are all safe and well.

I wanted to make a post to keep everyone in the loop of where I'm at personally and what that means for the future of my creations, and also give an exciting update!

How about the update first! After some concerns brought to my attention via this post. I decided to change the MC's best friend (Lakota's) name. I received a lot of feedback with reassurances that it was okay to keep this as his name, but at the end of the day, I realized it still has the potential to do harm. That's not what I'm about. Even if most people feel okay with this, someone out there may genuinely not be. The name is easy to change here, and it's not something I feel comfortable trying to justify or anything like that. It hurts me and readers less to change the name than it could by not changing it.

So, I had subscribers on Patreon and Ko-fi vote on a new name! I chose a list starting with 7 names. Voters narrowed down the selection to a top 3. The first 7 were: Kuno, Thamir, Emre, Lailoken, Kalei, Avi, and Asa. After the first round of votes, we narrowed it down to: Emre, Lailoken, and Kalei.

And the winner is...

Emre!

The name will be updated in a future patch!

Up next, I'll give you a heads up on future developments. Here I'll dip into a bit of my personal life. I'm not dipping too far for my comfort zone, and I might put a few things...delicately. But I want you to know what's up and where my head is at right now and why.

So, the second IF is likely not going to happen right now - I think (more on that below). I am not writing this to "stir the pot" or create fear or debate, but it's no secret that things in the States are super not okay. This happens to be where I am. My future is feeling rather uncertain and unsteady and some days I am just scared and not just for myself and loved ones. I am not going to go into all the little details, but my time is already at a premium with working full time and my personal life, and that free time is about to get a bit more narrow in the next 6 or 7 months.

I am prioritizing God-Cursed and Subscriber benefits and have decided that now is not the time to start a second project. I would rather focus on getting GC updates out if my extra time will have more limitations.

Now, the reason I said "I think" it's not going to happen is that - frankly - I'm at risk for suddenly losing my job. Yaay, go me! Part of what I do is funded through the federal government. I'm not employed through them directly, but no money for social services means I'm out of work. If this happens though - I'll have the time for a second project! Yaay???

My partner and I have some emergency plans in place for all kinds of things that might happen be it job loss or something much worse. If this happens, I will prioritize and expand my subscriber benefits to help us survive financially until more work can be found. I am already looking for a new job since the uncertainty is...difficult.

So, if I do find myself with extra time and still employed, I will work on a short story-based IF instead where you can romance 1 character per story. It will be much easier to produce than a fully plotted game. It will likely be a subscriber-only project, but full stories should be released at once (fully interactive with optional spice of course). If I lose my job, you can expect details on a new public IF shortly after, lol.

Okay, moving on to happier things...March is like...here. And March is Duri-month on Patreon and Ko-fi! Around the middle of the month you can expect a cute extra story featuring our favorite demigod for the "Crows" tier and a spicy extra for the "Ravens" tier. I anticipate posting around the 15th or 16th.

Here's a sample!

Currently chapter 6 sits at around 15k words and the first section of it is done (just needs some editing and the like). I'm also making my way passage by passage in previous chapters to improve grammar, word choice, coding, etc....

Anyway, I think that's everything! Take care and be safe!

~Lunan ^_^

[fanfics-i-find-here]

Do I Know You? Part 22

Synopsis: You and Jason make it to Wayne Manor to get ready, Jason has a serious conversation with Cass.

Note: I know I said Brunch next, but I was wrong. Let’s just all assume that the brunch will be a few chapters. I mean this honestly this time. The next chapter will actually be the brunch. After editing this chapter, it kind of feels like a filler, but there is some conversation towards the end. Enjoy!

Masterlist

The ride to the manor takes you outside of the city, but not like any usual road system, packed with commuters. No, this road, while the same size as the usual bridges and tunnels coming in and out of Gotham, has light traffic. Most of the travelers look like just that, travelers. The spare glances you could make of passengers and drivers through your helmet were wild-haired kids and aggravated parents, presumably on an out-of-town weekend trip.

Jason drove a little bit sharper than he usually did. He seemed antsy and originally you thought it was how the morning started but the further out of town, and presumably closer to the manor you got, the more he jittered. His hand would periodically leave the handlebars of the bike to pat and squeeze your thighs and knees. You’d think he was flirting but his hand wouldn’t stay for longer than two seconds before they were back to where they needed to be.

After you had crossed the bridge, the area became slightly more forested, with large houses appearing in between. It wasn’t long before his speed slowed, and you turned into the driveway of a multiple-story home. You think you understood why it was a manor and not a mansion. It didn’t spread out like a palace across the land. It simply looked like a townhome that had been tripled in size.

Jason slowly circled around the fountain in the middle of the rounded driveway before parking the bike right next to it. Your hands left him, and you waited for him to put the kickstand out and settle the bike. Instead, he revved the engine a couple of times, bike rolling forward. Startled, your hands clambered for his shoulders. They shook with laughter. You don’t hesitate to smack his arm. His hand leaves the handlebars to pinch at your thigh. Your leg kicks out instinctively, and you groan.

“Jason!” At your words, he finally turns off the bike and pops the kickstand, leaning the bike over. He offers his hand, like he always does, to help you get off. Once off the bike, you look around.

The manor sits on what you can assume is a few acres of land, lightly forested. You can see the start of a floral garden; the closer your eyes go to the house, everything is either budding or blooming in full color. Then there was the house. It fit in with Gotham, despite being so far out of the city. It had that same gothic feel to it, even though it didn’t look like a cathedral, like most buildings in Gotham. Your eyes scan from the top of the building to the front door, where a child was staring you down. You tense up and turn back to Jason, who was setting his helmet down on his bike.

“Jason,” you tug at the bottom hem of his jacket. You want to ask who the kid is, but apparently, Jason misinterpreted your tug for impatience. He pushes your chin up and starts undoing the straps for the helmet.

“Can’t wait five seconds. Think I’ve spoiled you, sweetheart.” He teases as he taps the side of the helmet.

You start to tug the helmet from your head, “That’s not what I was doing. We’re being watched.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s just Damian, I didn’t think he would be your welcome party.” He responds by setting your helmet on the bike and smoothing down the flyaways from your hair. You hadn’t realized how anxious you were feeling until his touch calmed your nerves. You were going to meet the rest of Jason’s family. You were starting to feel just a bit more antsy. Jason must sense it because his hands leave your hair to smooth up and down your arms.

“You’re going to be fine, Sweetheart. Alright? They’re gonna love you.” You don’t know why he’s reassuring you. You were just friends. Meeting your friend’s family wasn’t something to act weird about, but you wanted to make a good impression, should Jason ever actually make a move on you.

“Okay,” you nod, “just don’t leave me alone with anyone I don’t know, please.”

He laughs at you, the full grin that spreads across his lips makes your chest tight, and your smile forms.

“Wouldn’t dream of it. Come on.” He throws an arm over your shoulder and tugs you towards the door, where Damian is still staring. As you come closer, you have the same thought you had when you met Tim. Damian and Jason were definitely related; aside from skin tone difference, they looked very similar. Arguably, Damian and Jason looked even more similar than Tim and Jason, which means nothing because now you know they’re adopted, but whatever.

“What’re you doing, demon brat?” Jason says, his tone is different, just a tad harsher, and his question sounds like an accusation.

“Todd, Father sent me to ascertain if you will be staying.” You nearly laugh at the boy's words. You had thought Steph was pulling your leg when she said Damian spoke like that, but clearly not. What kind of kid uses the word ascertain?

“Yeah, gotta make sure my girl is taken care of,” Jason says the words smoothly, and your brain short-circuits. First, because Damian has been eyeing the whole conversation like you were some criminal and he was a lead detective, second, because you nearly preen, a physical reaction, at the way Jason called you, his girl.

“Very well. I will inform Father.” Then he turns to you, “I wish to converse with you during this morning’s enterprise. Cain and Brown await you.” With that, he promptly turns around and enters the house. You look at Jason.

“What just happened?”

“He didn’t threaten to kill you, so I think you're off to a good start.”

“Excuse me?”

“Come on, they’re probably in Cass’s room.” He pulls you forward again, ignoring your comments.

“Does he usually threaten to kill people?” you question just as you enter the foyer. Jason shrugs as he starts tugging your jacket from your shoulders. You let him, eyeing him out of the corner of your eye.

“He used to, but I guess not so much anymore.” He says, hanging up your jacket. He makes no move to remove his. His voice nudges at a hint of vulnerability that has you turning to hold his hands.

“You don’t spend much time with your family, do you?” Despite all the anxieties you had had before Jason decided to come with you, you hadn’t wondered why Jason wasn’t planning on being at a family event. He won’t meet your eye, but he does squeeze your fingers.

“No, it’s just-”

“Complicated?” You finish your sentence for him. You had heard the exact same thing from the girls. He nods with a small smile, before he’s dragging you into a hug, nosing at your hair.

“Take it easy with me today, honey.” his voice is light, but you can hear a slight plea in it, and you realize that this day might be harder for Jason than it was for you. You drag your hand up and down his back.

“Okay, Jay, I won’t bite your head off.” He huffs out a laugh at your words, but doesn’t move to separate from your hugging.

“Jesus, get a room if you're gonna do that.” An exaggerated shout comes from higher up. You part from Jason to look up the stairs on the side of the foyer. Steph and Cass lean over the short balcony railing, watching you two with wide grins.

“Oh, we were just getting started, you know a good place?” you tease, and Steph mimics a gag.

“Gross!”

You turn back to Jason to find him with a light flush. Your own skin warms. Considering the way the morning started, maybe you shouldn’t be joking like that around his family.

“I’m going to see if Alfred needs any help. Will you be okay with them?” he asks you quietly, to which you nod. He turns to the girls, “I’m leaving her in your care. Do not mess up.”

Steph’s grin turns mischievous. “What? You gonna take our privileges away?”

You can sense a brawl brewing, so you press a quick kiss to Jason’s cheek and start climbing the stairs. Halfway up, you turn back to Jason.

“I’ll see you later, okay?” he nods and starts down some other hallway, still wearing his jacket, and it has your brows scrunching in confusion. You don’t have much time to think about it because Steph is calling out to him as he walks away.

“Yeah, you later, Romeo!”

“Stephanie,” you say her name sternly as you meet them at the top of the stairs. You and Cass fall into an easy hug.

“Have I irritated you, honey girl? Still full naming me, it’s a shame.” Steph says, shaking her head, “Too bad. It's dress-up time!” She all but squeals, pulling you into her own hug that turns into her dragging you down the hallway. As always, Cass follows quietly with a small smile.

“You’re going to love your dress.” She finally says. Her calm demeanor soothes some of your festering anxiety. You remind yourself that these girls were your friends, not just Jason’s family.

The next hour and a half is a whirlwind of hair and some makeup. Half of the time was spent doing nothing but talking like you were at a sleepover. You had about an hour till the actual brunch, and that was when they pulled the dress. It took you a moment to recognize it, but once you did, you scolded the girls.

“You should not have bought this just for my sake,” you tell them, voice tipping on upset despite the way your hands curl around the floral fabric. The first dress you liked all those months ago hung on a hanger before you.

“You liked it so much, how could we let you go without?” Cass replies. You can hear the smile in her voice and see it when you turn to glare at her. Your eyes flicker between the two of them and you can feel yourself getting teary.

“You guys are so sweet.” You say sniffly.

“No crying! We just finished your makeup!” Steph is on you with a tissue, dabbing at your eyes. It makes you laugh because said makeup was light enough that a few tears wouldn’t ruin it. You try to wave off Steph with little success.

“We want to see the whole look,” Cass speaks around Steph's worrying, “Go put it on and we’ll help you with those straps again.”

You had forgotten all about the do-it-yourself straps, but it didn’t make or break the dress. You remembered how much you loved it at the boutique and hope that it wasn’t only because you had been down in the dumps the week prior. In the bathroom, once in the dress, you attempt to do up the straps. The only thing you succeeded in was draping them over your shoulders, it has you huffing in irritation.

“This is the only thing stupid about this dress,” you mutter as you step out of the bathroom, holding the straps up. The conversation that was going on dies down at your entrance.

“Jason,” You say his name with a smile, “you changed?” You don’t mean for it to come out as a question, but you had honestly thought he was going to stay in his leather jacket the entire time. now he was in slacks and a nice crisp white button-up. He looked good, not that you were going to say that out loud.

“The top of your dress is falling apart.” he ignores your question, and you playfully glare at him, to which he just smirks. You can see Cass and Steph out of the corner of your eye exchanging a look that has you dropping your gaze from Jason. You jump at the feel of fingers on your back.

“Sorry,” Cass speaks up. You hadn’t even heard her move. She moves the straps on your dress, and Steph is suddenly in front of you.

“How are we doing this? Regular straps? Halter? X?” Steph questions, and it takes you a moment to realize that as she speaks, Cass moves the straps.

“Go back to the halter. Mm-hmm. I think this is it.”

“I feel like a doll.” You meet Jason’s eye over Steph’s shoulder. He’s still hovering in the doorway of the room. He just smiles at you, a supportive thing that warms your chest.

“You’ll be the prettiest doll at the party, sweetheart.” You don’t think he meant to say it out loud, if his widened eyes had anything to say about it. Steph gives you a head tilted look. One that reminds you of your sister whenever you saw a cute boy at the mall. Her look slides off of you to look at Cass behind you, where it morphs into a silent conversation. She meets your eye with a more devious look, and you shake your head at her.

“Your boobs look real good in this dress too.” The moment the words leave her lips, you’re closing your eyes with a sigh. The girls didn’t know how your and Jason’s morning started, that you two nearly jumped each other, that your complicated relationship had just gotten more complicated. You don’t know why she was making the statement anyway, Out of all the clothes you had tried on that day in the boutique, this was not the boob dress, the red one had been.

“Don’t you think Jason?” Cass had just finished tying two of the straps and tucking the others away as Steph asked her question, stepping out of the way.

“Don’t answer that.” You say as Cass moves around to look at the front of the dress.

“It really does look good on you,” Cass adds, and you finally open your eyes. Both girls seem impressed, and Jason is staring. Thank god it’s not at your boobs like Steph seemingly tempted him to but he is taking in a slow glance, dragging his eyes up your frame. You want to squirm, but you can’t in front of the girls. Heaven forbid you give them more ammo. You break your stare from him.

“You two need to get dressed, too. I take it you’re not here for simple girl talk?” You speak to the girls and Jason. It shakes him out of his stare.

“I don’t know. You got any good gossip?” he gives you a teasing smirk that has you shifting on your feet as the girls move into a flurry to get dressed. How dare he tease you right now, looking like that? You step away from the shuffling girls to stand by him.

“Nothing exciting to you. This house is incredible.” You mutter to him as you watch Steph bang and bemoan about Cass beating her to the bathroom to change. Jason takes a step into the hallway, and you follow him, closing the door so Steph can change.

A silence settles between you, Jason takes a few more glances at you and your get-up. He sticks his hand out, and you take it without thinking. He pulls your hand up and twists your wrist slightly. You get the message and do a spin, your hand not leaving his.

“You do look gorgeous, honey. Boobs aside.” You snort at his comment and roll your eyes because you don’t know what Steph was thinking, mentioning that.

“I can’t believe her. That was ridiculous.” You huff, “You don’t look too bad yourself, by the way. I think I dig the corporate look, but isn’t it supposed to be pretty warm?”

You ask because you can’t imagine wearing long sleeves in the warm weather would be comfortable.

“Requirement.” He shrugs, “I wasn’t going to, but Alfred insisted. You’re probably right, though. This shit is stiff.” He tugs at the collar of the dress shirt.

“Is he here?” you question at the sound of Alfred’s name. You step into Jason’s space and tug at one of his sleeves, and he holds his arm out for you.

“Yeah, he’s helping with prep stuff in the kitchen.” He starts as you unbutton the sleeve and begin rolling it up, “he’ll be around during the brunch.”

He watches you roll the one sleeve up, and you try to stay calm as more of his forearm is exposed. You repeat the process on the other side in mild regret because you think you’ve just made Jason even more attractive, which is not something you need right now. Once down rolling, you smooth a thumb down his forearm to his wrist and finally meet his eye. He’s staring again. You wish he would just kiss you already, especially if he was going to look at you like that.

“That’s why I’m here.” He adds, breaking the silence.

“What?” You feel confused, you don’t remember what he was talking about.

“Alfred sent me up to get you girls. Everyone else is downstairs already.”

“But we have till ten thirty and it's only…” You tug at his wrist that has a watch. Of course, its analog, “Ten fifteen, we have fifteen more minutes.”

Jason smiles at your argument and throws an arm around your shoulder, pulling you down that hallway at a leisurely pace. You glance at the door where the girls are getting ready. You feel bad just walking away, but you two really aren’t walking fast.

“We have fifteen more minutes, even Steph has fifteen more minutes. Cass is a Wayne. Part of the host family. She needs to be there before the event starts.” Jason explains. The way he talks speaks of time dealing with this type of thing. But you catch the way he says we.

“Aren’t you part of the Wayne family? Shouldn’t you be there early?” he tenses a little at your question.

“Nobody wants to see me at these things. Promise I won't be missed.” There’s a layer of resentment in his words that has you tilting your head up at him. For a moment, you see a flash of anger across his features, something you’re not accustomed to with Jason, then it settles into a more stoic thing that you haven’t seen on his face in months.

“I’d miss you, handsome,” you say, snaking your arm around his waist as you rest your head on his shoulder.

“That’s cause you're special, sweetheart,” He utters before pressing a kiss to your head. You lean into him more and then jump at a loud BANG! You turn around to find Steph hopping out of the door, trying to get her shoe on. Cass meanders behind her with an amused grin, then she looks at you. Her amused grin grows as she glances between you and Jason.

“We’re coming! We’re coming! Wait for us!” Steph yells, finally getting her shoe on. She rushes to you and pulls you away from Jason and to the stairs. You throw an apologetic smile over your shoulder at Jason.

****

Jason watches you get dragged away in mild discontent, but the smile you throw him eases it away. He takes about two steps before Cass is right up next to him.

“You told her?” She questions, and it causes Jason’s brow to quirk.

“Told her what?”

“That you like her.” Cass offers, and Jason stops where he is. He hadn’t told you anything, but Cass had always been the body language expert. Maybe you two were being too obvious. Not that you were together or doing anything scandalous. But this morning had thrown him off his rocker a little.

“Why’d you say that?” he asks slowly, walking again.

“You two seem different. Something happened. You didn’t tell her?” Cass glances at him, and he feels antsy, but it has nothing to do with the brunch. He and Cass didn’t get emotional, nobody in the family did, but his relationship with Cass had always been strained the same way his and Bruce’s relationship will always be strained. Because of the moral code.

 Despite Jason’s hiatus on killing, he still believed the same thing he believed when he originally came back to Gotham. That the system was broken, and the way to end the violence done by the mass murdering villains was to get rid of them. Cass and Bruce were the exact opposite of him in every way when it came to that. Cass more so than Bruce. He understood it, considering her past, but it made it hard to talk to her sometimes.

“No, I can’t tell her, Cass.” He finally admits out loud. Cass just wants to help. He’s put in the work to try to be a part of this family again, and Cass was trying too. He would have to let her.

“Why not?” Cass asks in genuine confusion.

“She doesn’t know about my nightly activities, and I can’t just tell her. She might never want to talk to me again.” It hurts Jason to put the honest truth out there. You hate Red Hood. He had seen it that night you told him to leave, but you had beaten yourself up over it in the following days. That he had seen too. You confused him.  A lot.

“Is this about the Ivy thing?” Jason presses down the urge to roll his eyes. It wasn’t enough that everyone knew Ivy had gotten him and that he had to stay at the manor that night, but Dick had all but shouted at the rooftops about how he found you and him. It didn’t matter.

“It’s more than that. I could come up with a list, and I’m sure she has her own list too. Everything just got complicated, Cass.” His voice cracks, and he tries to clear his throat of the emotion there. Cass places a hand on his shoulder, and it makes him tense, but he doesn’t pull away.

“I’m sure you’ll figure it out. You two are good for each other. We’re all here for you. Even if you won’t let yourself believe it.” Jason hates this. He was always actively choosing to stay away from the family as often as possible. He told himself it’s because they never understood what it was like for him. But maybe he was lying to himself. Maybe it’s because, given the chance, his family are good people who want the best for everyone. He always thought it was out of pity. Maybe he was wrong.

“A puppy!” Jason hears your gasp from down the stairs; no doubt you’ve found Titus. The shout is followed by you speaking in a baby voice that he can’t even understand. It makes him ache to see you coo at the dog, but he still smiles at the sound of your voice.

“You don’t just like her. It’s more than that, isn’t it?” Cass’s concerned voice pulls him back down. They pause at the stairs, and Jason leans against the railing, dragging his hand down his face.

“It all got so complicated so fast, Cass. I can’t do anything. I just want to be in her life, and if that means just being her friend, that’s- that’s in love with her.” It hurts just to set out the truth, “Then so be it, but I can’t lose her.”

 Jason feels some tension ease in his chest. This heavy secret, now shared with someone who already knows his vigilante job. Someone who might actually understand. Cass is quiet for a moment before looping her arm with Jason’s to keep him moving down the stairs.

“She’s going to find out eventually,” her quiet voice breaks through the silence, “We are a family of the best detectives in the world, but sometimes even we make mistakes. It may not be because of you that she finds out.”

Jason’s chest tightens again with something else, less the fear of losing and more the anxiety of the unplanned. He couldn’t control everything and everyone when he came to you. He wanted to talk to Cass more, to tell her she was crazy and that he was very skilled at lying to you (not the skill he’s proud to boast about).

He doesn’t have the chance to because they find you on the ground in your nice dress. You’re on your knees, and Titus is all but sitting in your lap. You look overjoyed to have the dog in your lap. He’s surprised. Titus is usually such a well-trained dog; he is Damian’s, but if Jason could climb into your lap, he would too. Dear god, was he jealous of a dog?

Before they reach you and an impatient-looking Steph, he turns to Cass.

“Please don’t tell anyone about this, Cass. Everyone else will just make it worse.”

She stares at him for a moment before she nods, “I won’t stop them from anything they already have planned, though.” She releases her hold on him and walks away.

“What?” he mutters. They already had something planned?

Before he can get lost in a mop of upset with his siblings, he gets distracted by you. You glance over your shoulder to smile at him and point at the dog before you go back to petting him. You were beautiful, the dress fit you like a glove, and your makeup and hair enhanced everything. He was surprised by the sight of a chain around your neck, the pendant hidden under the dress in your cleavage, but he knew exactly what it was.

Despite what you had said to Red Hood, despite what he had done to you, you were still wearing the locket. It could be for your own safety. You must know that most Gothamites don’t have an emergency alert for the vigilantes of the city, but part of him can’t help but hope that there’s more to it. Maybe you didn’t hate him as much as he thought.

He still wasn’t going to tell you anything.

Additional notes: I’m excited for the next few chapters! I have things planned, and now it's just about organizing them and writing them. Thank you for reading!

Tag List: @little-miss-naill, @nikilolo787, @joonunivrs, @uzxotic, @qardasngan, @stormz369,  @g4bbi3xx, @iwatobiswimbros, @the-lonely-flute, @elz-xo, @gone-batty-fics, @princessesgarden, @notfckincreative, @love-theangel, @feyres-fireheart, @penguimlover23, @herodedicatedblog, @dearghostling, @automaticplant, @alma-ru3, @13fresh, @anuttellaa, @nekotaetae, @redsakura101, @sleepy-head1

[ahgasegotarmy116]

Just Take It | Jeon Jungkook | Part Four

Summary: After last night you don't know where you stand but tensions are still high and you don't know what you really want. Pairing: Inexperienced f!reader x Best Friend's Dad Jungkook (20 year age gap) Word Count: 5.6K~ Warnings: Smuuuuttt, Explicit Language and a crap ton of pet names (I'm sorry okay I love pet names lmao) Same warning as before cuz ya'll wanted more smut haha. Horribly edited too so have mercy on me y'all I just wanted to get it out. a/n: Aw shit here we go again 🤣 Anyways ya'll asked and I delivered lmao so another smut chapter but next one is gonna be mainly plot alight 😂 gotta save some more smut for later 🫢

Waking up the next morning I feel incredibly disoriented. 'Where am I? How did I get here? Why am I naked?' and at that last question I feel all the memories of last night rushing back to me.

Echos of the pet names and praises and the ghost of his fingers all along my body make every cell in my body buzz with need for more. I've never done something like that, something so...scandalous and with and man almost twice my age at that.

I thought that if I ever did something like this before I got married I would've felt shameful but I feel confident...wanted by someone who respects me for who I am and wanted nothing in return. It felt different that I thought it would've, having him hover over me, meeting me with his heated gaze. I wanted him closer. I wanted him to crawl under my skin and give me everything.

It's selfish to say I wanted more because he owes me nothing, he's given me so much and what have I given him in return? Nothing...

He says I've given him plenty but I still feel unworthy of his kindness. I have to do something to show him my thanks, to show him that I'm grateful for everything he's given me. I just don't know where to start.

~~~~~

Getting up and out of bed after I get my bearings was more difficult than I thought it would be. I felt almost a little sore from what we had done last night and I don't know if I should love or hate the sensation. Should I be mad that it got rough enough to cause this feeling or should I feel excited from still having a sensation left over from the pleasure he had given me?

As I continue to go round and round in my head with more useless doubts that run through my head I'm suddenly met with a light knock on the door.

"Um, just a second" I panic, looking around for something to cover up and notice the silk robe that had been placed on the bed and throw it on without a second thought before telling him to come in.

He opens the door and takes in my form for a second, biting his lip at the barely there fabric covering everything he saw last night. "Good morning" he husks out, his voice sending a shockwave between my legs making me cross them unconsciously, which garners a slight upturn at the corner of his mouth.

"Good morning" I squeak out, exposing my flustered state right away, cursing myself internally. "How'd you sleep?" he ask, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning up against the door frame, giving me space but somehow making his presence felt throughout the room.

"Amazing" I say, looking down at my feet in embarrassment, being honest but hating myself for it. "Yeah?" he prods, satisfied by my answer but begging to get that confirmation. "Yeah" I reply, nodding but still averting my gaze.

"Lunch is ready if you'd like to come downstairs. I check on you earlier to see if you wanted breakfast but you were still sleeping like a baby" he teases and if his voice alone didn't make me drop to the floor then that pet name at the end surely did.

"You alright?" he chuckles and I clear my throat before responding, knowing my voice would be no good if I tried to speak without doing so.

"I'm great, perfectly fine" I answer, glancing up at him before adjusting my robe and closing it around me even more. "I'll be waiting downstairs then. You can take your time getting dressed but you're also more than welcome to wear that all day" he taunts, pushing off the door frame and turning to leave after looking me up and down once more.

"I'll be down in a second" I call after him and wait for him to get downstairs before following the path he had just been on and running into my room, quickly but quietly shutting it behind me.

Leaning my head against the door I try to collect my thoughts and stop my racing heart that bound to explode at the next Baby, Bunny or Darling that's bound to come out of his mouth. 'It's just Jungkook. He's been nothing but nice to me and he seems like a really great guy.

We just need to talk and figure things out before something like that happens again' I coach myself and turn to face my room where I'm greeted with a freshly made bed and a single flower in a small vase.

'I can never catch a break with this man' I smile, shaking my head and dropping the robe to change into something more comfortable.

~~~~

"There she is" Jungkook say when he catches sight of me walking down the steps and into the kitchen where he has both of our lunches set out across the island from each other. "This looks so good!" I compliment the food he's made as he motions for me to sit down.

"I'm sorry it took me a while to come down" I apologize, sitting down and taking a drink of water before piercing a fork though the strawberry he has in a bowl full of fruit for us to share. "It's alright, I don't mind waiting for you. Seems like I tired you out last night so I'm glad you got some sleep" he say, smiling over the lip of his glass, making me choke on the next strawberry I had just placed in my mouth.

"You okay Darling?" he asks, handing me a napkin, with that last word aiding to my death by asphyxiation along with the strawberry lodged in my throat. "I'm fine" I choke out after a few more coughs and a drink of water.

"You seem rather jumpy today. Is something wrong?" he asks, tilting his head a bit and attentively waiting for my answer. "I'm fine, I think I'm still trying to wake up" I say, faking a yawn at the end to hopefully legitimize my claim. "Fair enough" he says, taking a bite of his food and grabbing his phone when it starts ringing.

"You can take that if you want" I say, taking a drink of water and glancing down at his phone before making eye contact with him. "No it's alright, I can take care of it later" he brushes off, silencing the call and taking a drink of water.

"So do you have any plans for the day?" he questions, looking at me as if I'm the most fascinating thing on earth. "Well, um, no not really. Do you?" I echo and when he goes to open his mouth to respond he's cut off by his phone ringing, not doubt from the same number again.

"Just take it. I'll be here when you get back I promise" I tease and he clears his throat, unbeknownst to me have flashbacks of when I asked him to take my virginity.

"It's for work, I'll be back soon" he says and I nod my head in response and close my eyes when he comes over to give me a kiss on the forehead like he's done time and time again but when I look up at him afterwards I see he hasn't made moves to leave.

His phone stopped ringing at some point which leave us with a lingering silence with so many words unsaid ultimately cut off by another incoming call. "I'm sorry" he whispers, his eyes glancing down at my lips before he turns around to head to his office answering with a curt 'What?' to whoever is on the other end of that call.

'I would hate to be that guy' I smile to myself, the vision of seeing him get mad comes to mind leaving my pressing my thighs together. 'Why am I so fucking horny these days?' I roll my eyes and continue eating my lunch, laughing at the sound of his frustration but hating that he's going through it at the same time.

~~~~~

It's been about a half an hour and he's still on the phone leaving me scrolling through mine until my brain feels as though it's turned to mush, a part of my brain occupied by him and only him.

As I hear another irritated sigh I decide I'll bring him some pain medication to help with the onset headache I'm sure he's having. It's gotta be a big problem if they're calling him on a Saturday morning.

I open the door slowly and peak my head in, being met with the sight of him with his laptop open and a mess of papers all over his desk. He looks up at me with an apologetic wince but waves me in nonetheless.

I raise my arms up, showing a full glass of water along with a bottle of pills and he mouths a silent 'Thank you' and I nod happily, proud that I made the right decision and place the glass on his desk while I open the pill bottle and drop a couple onto his palm to which he places them in his mouth and immediately chases it with the glass of water.

Watching as his Adam's apple bobs up and down as he gulps down the water has my head dizzy for some reason but I'm not sure why. While I'm trying to come up with an explanation some water spills on his cheek as he swallows the rest.

I feel as though my body has been taken over by an outer being because my reaction was to catch that stray drop of water off his cheek with my thumb and bring it to my mouth.

His eyes dart over to mine, wide in shock and leaving me feeling as though I'd done something wrong. My next move being to hightail it out of here but he stops me with a firm grasp on my hip, making me lean up against his desk next to him.

I make an effort to slip out of his hold but he gives me a warning glance, wordlessly telling me to behave and I do just that, shutting my mouth and watching as he works. He keeps a hand on my waist, making sure I'll stay, his thumb gently rubbing circles on my hip mindlessly where my shirt had risen up in my try to escape.

I do my best to keep my composure but the visions of last night flashing though my head makes it hard to control myself from rubbing my thighs together and I ultimately lose the battle.

Forgetting that he still has a hold on me earns me a knowing glance when he notices my actions, his gaze gradually getting more and more heated.

I lean back in an effort to get comfortable while I wait, my palms helping me balance on his desk behind me, leaving my chest sticking out a bit. I earn a tight squeeze on my waist as a warning to be patient and to stop squirming, which at the moment is very hard to accomplish with him looking so fucking sexy talking business with the man on the other line.

Was I relieved that it was a man calling him three times in a row on a Saturday afternoon? Yes, yes I was. It's none of my business though, nor do I have any grounds to have an opinion on it but his hand sliding up my waist says otherwise.

"Yes. Okay, okay alright was that everything? Okay well we'll pick this up on Monday morning. Thanks alright you have a good weekend too. Okay bye" he says, looking at me the whole time he finishes up his call, squeezing my waist now, making my breathing pick up and I know I'm in trouble when he hangs up the phone.

"You're a little minx you know that?" he says, turning his chair to face me and takes his hand off my waist only to slide it down my arms and hold my hand, placing kisses on my knuckles. "What do you mean?" I question, already breathless from the look of him sitting back in his chair, his legs spread wide and his gaze getting darker by the moment.

"You know what I mean. You came in here acting all innocent and helpful and next thing I know it you're licking water off my cheek? Seems pretty naughty Bunny. Don't you think?" he says while kissing the tips of my fingers, making sparks fly through my arms and straight to my head, keeping my gaze locked on his.

"I didn't lick it off your cheek" I say quietly but he lets out a dry chuckle in response. "Technicalities will get you nowhere sweetheart. Just admit that you wanted my attention, you were too impatient and couldn't even wait an hour for me to come back to you. It's okay, I won't laugh" he says, pulling on my hand and making me stumble onto his lap, my legs hanging over one of them.

"I- I just wanted to hel-" "I'm sure you did Darling and you were so thoughtful bringing me that medicine but I know you wanted something else huh?" he says while brushing away the hair that had fallen on my face when he pulled me down.

I shake my head but he cocks a brow at me, wordlessly telling me to tell him the truth so I in turn nod my head, admitting that deep down I did want his attention again.

"Now what was it that my Princess wanted? Did she just want attention or did she want to be touched again? Wanted me to take care of her again?" he taunts, taking note of all the times he's seen me rub my thighs together or get that breathless look on my face. I nod my head but he shakes his leaving me confused.

"If my Bunny wants something she's gotta use her words. Can you do that for me Darling? Can you use that pretty mouth of yours and tell me you want Daddy to touch you again?" he says, testing out a new name to call himself that's got me squirming again.

"Nuh uh none of that Darling, if you want something you've gotta ask for it. Now be a good girl and tell me what you want" he says, holding my hips in place, unbeknownst to me preventing me from rubbing my ass against him, still wanting to hold himself back.

His only priority and desire is to make me feel good and he wouldn't have it any other way. He knows I'm inexperienced and doesn't want to scare me away. He wants to take his time with me. 

"I want you to..." I start, trailing off from embarrassment, not being used to saying stuff like this let alone to someone as intoxicating as him.

"What was that Bunny? Didn't catch that" he presses, clearly enjoying the internal struggle that's shown all over my face. If he didn't know I had a shit poker face then he sure as hell knows now. No matter how you slice it he'll always be able to read me like a book.

"I want you to touch me" I whisper and he leans in as if he couldn't hear me but my lips at this point are inches from his, the slightest movement connecting mine with his.

"Lie back for me yeah?" he asks, his lips ghosting against mine before grabbing my hip and guiding me to sit on his desk before pushing all of his papers and laptop to the side dramatically making me laugh at the motion until I notice his laptop falling to the floor. His eyes follow mine and notice said device and simply shrugs.

"I can buy another one" he mumbles against my lips before connecting them in a short lived kiss as he guides me down, my back against his desk while he hovers over me. "You wanna try something else?" he says, watching my expression change from one of nervous excitement to intrigue.

"You trust me?" he questions, watching my face for any hesitation but finds none. "Yes" I say, nodding my head and he smiles before placing a kiss on my lips. "Close your eyes for me yeah? I promise I won't put it in. Well, not yet" he says and my eyes bug out at his words, my legs that are wrapped around his waist pull him even closer in an effort to close my legs.

"You like that? You like the idea of me claiming you as mine? Me being your first, your first everything" he says, leaning down and placing kisses on my neck, his warm breath against my sensitive skin driving me insane. I shudder at the feeling and he chuckles before placing a kiss under my ear, garnering another shudder in response.

"Answer me Bunny. You want me to be your first everything? Want me to learn and teach you everything you need to know about your body and what brings you pleasure?" he says while tracing his right hand along my torso, ghosting his fingertips along my waistband.

"Yes. Yes, I want you. Please just take it, take everything" I mumble and he tsks at me, again leaving me confused. "I'm not just gonna take everything. I'm giving you as much as I'm taking love. If you're letting me have you then you have me in return. Never forget that" he says and I nod my head. "I won't forget" I utter and he smiles in response before telling me to close my eyes again.

"Can I take these off bunny?" he asks in regards to my leggings and I mumble out a quick 'yes' trying to hold the whimpers at bay from the thought of me letting him have complete control over me. I know I have the power to stop everything but I wouldn't want to. Not with him.

As he slides everything off me he curses at the sight of me. "Fuck you're dripping" he rasps and I try to close my legs in response, now truly feeling that sense of vulnerability "You've gotta stay nice and still for me Darling. Can you do that?" he asks and I respond with a whimper which satisfies him, having mercy on me this time.

He drags a finger along my folds just as he had done before, gathering up my arousal before circling around my bud, gaining him a soft moan in response. "Be loud for me yeah? Wanna hear you moan my name" he prompts, wanting to hear what his name sounds like when it passes through my lips filled with ecstasy.

He doesn't wait for a response and just continues to play with me just as he did last night but as I feel myself getting closer he pulls away leaving me groaning from the feeling of getting that high again being taken away.

"Ready for something new princess?" he asks, caressing one of my thighs and placing a kiss on the inside of it. "W-wait!" I flinch nervously, not knowing how to feel about this. I've heard about it before but I never knew if it would be something that I'd like.

"You want me to stop?" he ask, pulling away a bit and letting me take control. "I'm scared, I-i I don't know what it'll feel like. I'm not sure if I'll like it" I admit, feeling as though I was about to cum just from the thought of him doing that to me.

"I can stop if you'd like, it's up to you princess. I wanna make you feel good and this is something I think you'll love. I know it's something I'd love to do to you if you'll let me" he says, coaxing me into it since he knows I'm just nervous, placing a few more kisses on my skin, this time switching to the other thigh.

I take a few breaths and think about it but decide to trust him, just as he asked me to. 

"I want you to do it" I let out, my cheeks burning up at the thought of what I'm asking for. "You want Daddy to eat you out?" he says smiling, loving the fact that I've still kept my eyes closed. I start to squirm, feeling his warm breath traveling further up my thigh, the anticipation driving me crazy. 

"P-please" I choke out, tears prickling my eyes as the intensity of the moment increases. "Patience Princess. Remember what I said about being loud?" he asks, his breath fanning directly over my core, making me lose all sense of feeling except for what he's barely doing to me. He hasn't even touched me and I'm about to cum. 

He leans in and gives a soft kiss to my clit, my legs spread wide and giving him full access to me. I take in a sharp breath at the sensation, my muscles locking up only for a moment but nonetheless catching his attention. 

"You want me to keep going?" he whispers into me, his nose nudging my clit, making me clench around nothing and he notices right away, utterly exposed to him. I moan out a ‘yes’ and he smiles, placing a kiss on my upper thigh before going back in, slowly making out with my clit, his tongue tracing circles around it before traveling down to my hole that's begging to be full. 

He licks inside me and watches my reaction, my brows drawn together and my lips parted, uttering curses when I feel him slip his tongue in further, the sensation driving me insane. My back arches off the table when he presses his face against me. His nose rubbing against my clit while his lip and tongue make out with my entrance. 

If I were to open my eyes now I bet all I could see was the world spinning around me, the feeling of being drunk on him being my drug of choice and I don't think I'll ever be able to live without it.

"Fuck Jungkook" I moan out, this being the first time I get close to screaming his name and he growls into me before going back to playing with my clit, making me do it again. "You sound so sweet Bunny, but you taste even sweeter" he groans, watching as my chest rises and falls in the baggy shirt I've still got on. 

"Do me a favor love and lift up your shirt, that's it. Wanna watch you play with your tits" he rasps out. Doing just as he asks I moan at the image of him watching me touch myself again, incredibly turned on by the though of it alone. 

"There you go, you're doing so good for me. Look so pretty laying here and letting me play with you in my office. Fuck you're driving me crazy" he praises making me whimper in response. 

"You like that? You like it when Daddy praises you? Like it when he tells you you're being so perfect for him? Pretty just wants to be worshiped doesn't she?" I let out a moan at the thought of him taking time and worshiping anything and everything about me. I try to close my legs again on impulse but he pries them open, growling at the thought of me hiding from him. 

"I'm not done with you" he says, biting the inside of my thigh leaving me arching my back off the desk again, squeezing my breasts and making him even hungrier for me if even possible. 

"Does my baby like pain? Does she want me to leave marks all over her as a reminder? A reminder of how you let me have my way with you while you were spread out for me on my desk. I'm not gonna be able to focus next time I have to work in here. Always gonna remember how sweet you taste and how adorable you sound"  he says, licking the area he just bit before sucking a mark into the same spot.

I groan at the feeling, the slight sting from the bruise making me want to ask him for more. To mark me everywhere like he said, always leaving a reminder. 

I scream at the feeling of him putting his mouth on me again, kissing, sucking, licking into me without mercy, catching me off guard by the intensity. I let out an incoherent string of curses, hoping he knows I'm begging for more and he moans against me, the vibrations sending shockwaves throughout my body. 

"Don't stop, please please don't stop" I scream, the first decipherable words I've uttered in a while. On the cusps of ecstasy he growls into me when he sees me throw my hand over my mouth, embarrasses by how loud I'm getting. "Louder" he growls as a warning, not a request and so I do. 

I get louder and louder, screaming his name with curses being the only other words in my vocabulary. I feel as his movements get more intense, now using his fingers as well and moments later a wave of pleasure is crashing down, making me let out any and every sound I could possibly make, my voice getting softer and softer and I start to come down. 

Just when I feel like he's gonna stop he doesn't, he picks up the pace again which makes me whine in overstimulation, trying to wiggle away from him. 

"You can give me one more can't you?" he asks, pulling back only to lick a stripe into me, taking time to suck my sensitive bud into his mouth. "N-no no I can't" I say, shaking my head and trying to push him off and he pulls back and chooses to lean over me. 

"Just one more Bunny. I know you can" he encourages. Although I'm reluctantly saying no we both know I want to experience it, wanna experience coming undone one right after the other. 

He comes down and kisses me, making me taste myself on his lips and I can't get enough of him, I want to be good for him, I want him. I whine when he delicately runs his fingers over me again "You're so swollen but I'm sure you can handle it, can't you Darling?" he taunts. 

He pulls away from my lips and trails his down, kissing and sucking marks all over my chest giving me a bit more time to recover before deciding. "Yes, fuck yes" I moan when he greedily sucks one of my nipples into his mouth. My back arches again when he moans around it, making me desperately want to cum again, wanting it as much as he does now. 

"Want you to watch me this time. Can you do that?" he ask, giving me one last kiss on the lips before sliding his tongue down my torso, stopping to bite my hip, breaking me out of the daze I'd been left in, asking me to answer.

I nod my head and he luckily takes that as a response, going easy on me since I'm still not fully there after what he'd done to me. What he's still doing to me...

~~~

After he makes me cum again I lose all sense of reality and I can barely tell up from down. He leaves the room only for a moment to get a warm towel to clean me up and I take that time to catch my breath, staring at the celling and trying to wrap my head around what just happened. 

I jump at the feeling of him cleaning me up gently and he apologizes, going a little slower with a lighter touch, doing just enough before helping me sit up. "You with me?" he asks, steadying me as I still sit on his desk, swaying back and forth. 

I turn my eyes to him and blink sleepily, smiling and taking in his handsome features and notice how red and swollen his lips have gotten. 

"There she is" he coos, brushing my hair back and cupping my face, looking at me as if I was incredibly precious to him. Little do I know that that's exactly what I am to him. 

That's a conversation for another time though. For now he'll just enjoy the dazed and freshly fucked look I give him, laughing at how adorable I look. 

"You wanna bath?" he asks and I nod, making the corner of his lips turn up before he scoops me up. I cuddle into him and link my arms around his neck, enjoying the slight bouncing sensation I feel with every step he takes. 

After he ascends the steps with ease I watch as we pass by my bedroom door and get confused as to why he's not taking me to bathe in there. I frown at him and he chuckles shaking his head and walking the both of us into his room.

"My bathtub is bigger and more comfortable" he explains and I nod, tightening my hold on him for only a moment before he guides me to sit on the edge of the tub. 

"You want a bubble bath?" he asks, turning to look through his cabinet and pulls out two bottles, one that smell of lavender and the other of eucalyptus. I point at the lavender and he smiles, nodding his head and putting the other one back before walking over to turn the faucet on, adjusting it until it's just the right temperature. 

"Do you take bubble baths Mr. Jeon?" I tease, earning a playful glare that breaks into a smirk moments later. "Who says grown men can't tale bubble baths? And it's Daddy to you" he says booping me on the nose, giving me butterflies. 

"You like being called Daddy huh?" I tease again and he crouches down in front of me, putting us at eye level. "I dunno, sounded like you liked it back there too" he says, smirking when he sees me avert my eyes, this time placing a kiss on my nose before straightening up. 

"Arms up" he orders and I lift them up so he can take off the last piece of clothing I've got left. "Who's shirt is this?" he asks, taking note of the oversize fit. "It's mine" I say truthfully, too quick for his liking though, making him suspicious of me. "Uh huh" he says slowly before throwing it in the corner of the bathroom. 

With a look like that even I can tell that I won't be getting that back anytime soon. It really is my shirt though...

After he pours in the bubbles and I'm satisfied by their bubbliness (which he reminds me is not a real word) I get in and moan at the feeling of the warmth enveloping me. My muscles losing all of their tension as I breathe in the calming scent of lavender surrounding me.

"You enjoying yourself?" he chuckles, leaning up against the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest just as he had done this morning and I gulp at the sight. "Yeah, I needed this" I say, sinking further into it and being swallowed whole by the bubbles. "Well just call me if you need me" he says but before I can stop myself I quickly tell him 'No'.

He tilts his head to the side and smiles softly, taking in the precious sight of me surrounded by bubbles with almost a panicked look on my face, showing my honesty in wanting him to stay. "Can you sit with me maybe?" I ask, looking down and playing with the bubbles, shy that I'm begging for even more of his attention. 

"Sure Darling" he says, grabbing a stool that was tucked in a corner and placing it right next to the tub so he can stay with me. 

After a few moments of comfortable silence I break it with the one question that's been on my mind since I felt the air shift between us. 

"Can I ask you a question?" I say, looking up at him, noticing that he's started to play around with the bubbles that rest high above the surface. "No" he answers, pushing a dampened strand of hair off my face. 

"What?" I freeze, surprised at his answer. "I know what you're gonna ask so no. You can't, not yet. Let's get you cleaned up and well rested before we go there, alright?" he asks giving me a sad smile, so many words left unsaid behind those eyes, begging to be released.

I wait for a moment, studying him and notice that he looks almost...vulnerable. Something I had never seen from him before so I decide to just nod my head, returning the same smile before leaning back against the tub and sinking in a bit further, the water now just below my nose. 

"Aye! Don't you go drowning on me in there" he chuckles and my eyes smile, glad my efforts of lightening the mood had worked. 

Taking it a step further I choose violence and splash him, making the bottom of his shirt get wet. He gasps at the action and puts his hand over his chest "I make you a nice bath and this is how you repay me? The audacity!" he says dramatically before giving me a splash in return leaving me gasping just as he had done.  

After exchanging a few more splashes and laughs we call it a truce and we sit there talking and joking around until the water goes cold, going back to that sense of normalcy that I was so scared that we might've lost... 

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[my-castles-crumbling]

OMG Clandestine is done!

I am so so so excited to say I just posted the epilogue to Clandestine! Featuring a beautiful commission from @itslotuseater!

Ships: Jegulus, background wolfstar, dorlene, pandalily, rosekiller Rating: M Length: 142k (FINISHED! COMPLETED! AHH!)

Summary:

He was crying. “You can do that?” He repeated, feeling like he was in some sort of dream. And then, Sirius seemed to realize. Because for a twelve-year-old, he was decently smart, and knew him better than anyone. “D’you…d’you want to do that, Reggie? I thought…I thought it was just a game?” But he could only shake his head. Because it wasn't a game. He was a boy. And he could tell from Sirius's nervously resigned expression that Sirius knew it, too. "It's...not a game." --- There's not enough Trans Regulus Black, so here's a fic to help fix the problem. Rated mature for lots of references to transphobia and Walburga Black being a piece of shit. COMPLETED (I'm not crying, you are)

Ahhh, my long-winded thank-you note:

First and foremost, thank you to Arson, my amazing Alpha Reader who brainrotted with me throughout almost the entire process. I literally could not have finished this without you, and I am so thankful to have you in my life. You've helped me through so many cases of horrible Writer's Block, encouraged me whenever I needed it, and you're an amazing friend. I hope you love your "Barty and Evan's Bitch" shirt :D

Second, to my wife, who literally dealt with me talking about this fic for TEN MONTHS. You're literally the most amazing and supportive person in my life, and I love you more than words. Thank you for being the James to my Regulus.

Third, to my Beta Reader, Kat, who is still wading through the trenches of this fic finding all my mistakes. I am so glad to have you and thank you for dealing with all of my errors and answering my messages at odd hours of the night.

Fourth, to all of the people who have encouraged me: Abby, Danielle, Kelz, everyone on the discord servers who has seen me struggle, you guys are amazing and I am so thankful to you.

Fifth, to the lovely people who created fanart for this fic. You all are amazing and you brought this to life. I bow down to you, truly, you are so incredibly talented.

Sixth, to the people who I interviewed about dysphoria and being on T, so I could have a more well-rounded understanding about Regulus's experience. Though I identify as trans, I am so thankful that other trans people were willing to give their experiences in areas I wanted to describe as accurately as possible.

And last, to all of you, who read and kudosed and inboxed and recommended and commented and kept me going. You all are amazing, and you've made this such a positive experience. This fic really was for me, to work through my own gender an discover about myself, and I am so thankful you have been here along this journey.

I want to reiterate that this is one trans person's journey, but I think it's so important to have representation in all forms of media. I'm hoping that my version of Reggie has helped with that a little bit! He's my baby, and he deserves all the good things.

Keep an eye out for the B-sides of this fic! I'll add a chapter to this work linking to it, so if you're subscribed to this, you'll get an e-mail. I'll also be editing this work to fix all the errors, and I'll be doing the B-sides as I go. It probably won't be for a couple of weeks, since I am now working, and I won't have any strict posting schedule, but I'm excited for those as well!

I love you all. Thanks for being a part of this journey.

[potatomountain]

CIY- CH 17

Chapter Seventeen

📍Pairing: detective ateez ot8 x detective afab reader 📍Summary: "Down Bad" 📍WC: 3.4k 📍AU: detective/mafia 📍Genre: action, dark themes, poly romance, smut 📍Warning(s): 18+ rating, voyeurism, suggestive 📍Nets: @pirateeznet | @mirohs-aurora-society 📍Beta readers (and sole motivation): @flurrys-creativity , @candypop1611 , @yourfatherlucifer , @yessa-vie and edited(usually) by the amazing: @daemour

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Mingi stepped into the office through the back door, being gentle as he shut it as he was late. He was hoping to just slip over to his desk so Seomghwa wouldn't notice, but he froze up when the door to Yeosang's office opened up. He briefly spotted the plethora of monitors inside, but it was the man's expression that stopped him.

Yeosang looked… hurt almost. “You're late” He mumbled matter-of-factly, but didn't call out to the others like some of them would.

“Phone died.” Mingi replied sheepishly, holding up his phone that still only had a single digit battery percentage. He was usually good about charging his phone but last night he was far too preoccupied with you to remember and it died sometime between round four and round seven if he had to guess. And that was over twenty four hours ago.

His cock was twitching just at the memory of all you both had done.

Yeosang observed his face for a moment before his own expression shifted and then closed off. “Tell it to Hwa. Wooyo is already testing his nerves.” He stepped out of the room and headed down the hall without another word, something in his hands: several thick folders. He had been digging into some new people. Mingi’s curiosity almost had him forgetting his predicament, but he got close to his desk before his name boomed through the room. Flinching, he looked over to Seonghwa, a sheepish smile on his own face to try and defuse his anger.

The loud moan coming from Hongjoong’s office had him realizing that Seonghwa was not going to play nice any time soon. Yunho laughed at Mingi’s crestfallen expression as he sat down next to him, just to have the sound die in his throat, eyes fixated on his neck. “Now that almost everyone-” Seonghwa winced at Wooyoung’s cry from the Captain’s room, “-is here we can start.” He stood up a bit taller, hands folded behind him and jaw tense. “When was the last time he fucked you Hwa?” Yunho chimed in, leaning back in his seat. “It’s making you pissy. One of us could do the job?” Jongho scoffed, also in a bad mood. “Please. Everyone else has been waiting for the newbie to spread her fucking legs. Like dogs in heat just begging for a taste.” He narrowed his eyes on San. “You especially. Just fuck her already.” San rolled his eyes, setting down his usual drink that didn’t taste the same since you hadn’t brought it. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” “The gym? Really? I’ve been waiting to tear into you about it. In the arena? Seriously gross, we use that for practice.” Mingi sat up a bit more, brows pushed up. “What do you mean?” He turned to San. “Did you fuck her already? In the gym?”

San blushed, looking away and rubbing the back of his neck. “I just got her off with my fingers. Then Wooyoung called, Captain wanted me in the field and I had to leave her. I haven’t gotten to talk to her since.” The main reason for that was the swollen eye, again, and the stab wound on his thigh. He hadn’t wanted to worry you with his injuries again, so he had gone straight back to his shared apartment with Wooyoung. “And you won’t either. If we can move on from fucking her we can talk about putting her to work.” Seonghwa demanded everyone’s attention, clearly annoyed it took a moment for them to settle down. “She will start under Wooyoung-” “Seriously?” Jongho stood up quickly, hands on the desk. “He might-” “She will start under Wooyoung.” Seonghwa repeated through gritted teeth. “Because the rest of you have other orders. Yunho and I are returning to the warehouse and making our move there. San, you are to rest and stay in contact with the few informants of the Green Vipers. We need to know every move they make and to keep the suspicion off of us. Jongho-” He snarled his lip and pointed to the seat. “Sit first.” Jongho did, reaching for Yeosang who stood by his desk. Seonghwa took note of the files in Yeosang’s hand and frowned. When the quiet man noticed, he cleared his throat and spoke up. “Before you give me orders I would like to say something.”

Seonghwa was clearly confused, but nodded. “Speak.” Behind him the Captain’s door opened and out stumbled Wooyoung with a shit eating grinning, wiping off some spit from the corner of his mouth. Seonghwa didn’t dare look back just yet. “I’d like to look into the S.K unit some more-” “Binnie’s unit? Why is that?” Wooyoung walked over to him and wrapped an arm around his friend. “Oh you have his file? Not like you to snoop without an order Sangie. What’s the deal with the S.K Unit?” “It’s Butterfly’s old unit.” Yunho chimed in, interest cleared perked. “With that shitty fucking Captain?” Mingi sneered out, adding on. Wooyoung looked surprised. “Chan is the Captain that kicked her out? He didn’t seem shitty, really righteous and stubborn though.” Mingi scoffed, rolling his eyes. “You mean self-absorbed prick? He hurt-” He clenched his jaw, going quiet. Yunho gasped though, following his train of thought. “Oh you have it worse than I thought. Is that why you have hickies on your neck?” Several of them in the room reacted in shouts simultaneously. “Hickies? From Sweetcheeks?” “Oh did you two fuck?” “You’re fucking joking?! Thought you hated her too.” “Oh nice, me next!!” Seonghwa silenced them all by speaking over them? “Enough!” The chaos settled and he stared at Mingi who was now avoiding everyone’s gaze. “Spill.” “It’s not my place-” “They did.” Yeosang spoke up, an edge to his tone. “Back to what I was saying, Captain Chan has bothered her twice now and she had repeatedly told him to leave both times. First here, then at her apartment complex Saturday evening. She’s emotionally involved with most of the unit at least as friends, using two to help her with her undercover trial. I’d like permission to dig up anything I can use to get them to back off if they get too close.” The room went quiet, Wooyoung gawking at his friend while several others were just as shocked. It was Hongjoong’s laughter that broke the silence. “Wow, this is… wow.” He stepped up around Seonghwa and leaned against the nearest desk: Wooyoung’s. “So let me get this straight, Mingi has fucked her-” “Nonstop since Saturday evening.” Yeosang added with a deadpan expression. Hongjoong held up his hand to quiet the budding exclamations. “Mingi has been fucking her like a rabbit in heat, since Saturday, where I assume he had stepped into the altercation between Firecracker and Captain of the SK unit?” 

Yeosang nodded, giving his Captain all his attention. “Punched him and acted as her boyfriend. Wouldn’t want him to cause problems should he realize Mingi is part of her unit now.” Hongjoong chuckled at that, glancing at Mingi appreciatively with the others. “Good job. We’ll talk about the sex later.” “Then better scold San too. He did get her off in the gym. In the arena. Saw it on Yeosang’s monitor. Unfortunately.” Jongho sneered out. Hongjoong glared in his direction. “Thank you for your input. Yet it is looking like you are the only one who isn’t open to the idea of fully integrating her at this point, Jongho.” “He doesn’t want another woman. Man is still angry about the last- ouch!” Wooyoung hissed out when Jongho had reached around Yeosang to step on his foot. “It’s true!”

“I still believe she won’t be able to handle it.” Jongho grumbled, arms crossed. “But half of you are so whipped for her already what’s the point in fighting you on it. You want her, fine, but I still refuse.” Yeosang patted his shoulder before urging his Captain to speak. “Mingi has been fucking her, punched another Captain, San got her off in the gym-” “When did the Captain stop here?” Hongjoong asked curiously. “The day she was late and missed her usual breakfast. You had me install our information network on her laptop.” Yeosang offered, the room falling silent. “What? Did I say something wrong?” San sighed, leaning forward a bit. “How often do you watch her Sangie?” He furrowed his brows in confusion. “It’s surveillance San. I need to make sure she is trustworthy.” “How do you know her usual breakfast then? And how often she’s been fucking Mingi? And when her old chief bothers her?” “He has a point.” Wooyoung said with a grin. “Does Sangie finally like someone?” When the man in question grew flustered, he teased him further “ooo, did you get off on her getting off? Probably found the best angles to watch her get fucked by Mingi?” “I don’t have a clear view of every angle of her apartment.” Yeosang didn’t deny it though.

Mingi gawked. “You were watching me fuck her? Damn, I thought Wooyoung was the sex freak.” “Hey, that would be like at least half of us.” Wooyoung huffed out defiantly. Seonghwa sighed and sat down. “This is going nowhere. Joong, you’re enjoying this too much.” He elbowed the grinning man next to him in the side.

Hongjoong just chuckled. “They like her, it’s cute.”

“You set down precautions to keep Wooyoung in check right? Ensuring she doesn’t discover anything she shouldn’t?” Seonghwa ignored his comment, instead voicing his concerns. “Wooyoung will do his job well and Yeosang will be surveying their work as usual, yes. You and Yunho will be overseeing things in the warehouse. Make sure the Vipers struggle. If our little Firecracker’s idea is going to work, the Vipers need to be pressed on multiple sides.” “And if the Red Wolves catch on it was us that invaded their territory and not the Vipers? Will she be ready for action?” The others were going on about their own perverted tendencies, saying quite a few lewd things they wanted to do to you or see done to you. Neither Seonghwa or Hongjoong wanted to stop it for now. “Let’s hope we can get her focused on the Pink Boas and away from our other plans so that if things go south, she won’t be involved.” “And Mingi? Jongho?” The both looked at the two men, the former flustered as Yunho teased him about the hickies; the latter sneering in disgust at the conversation between Wooyoung and Yeosang as the techie was teased for his voyeurism. “While the Wolves have retaliated against the vipers, they are bound to spill something useful. They’ll be with me overseeing that.” “Will you be able to keep them from tearing each other up over the newbie long enough for that?” Seonghwa lifted a brow, naturally leaning towards his Captain. Hongjoong chuckled and nodded, reaching out to touch the small of Seonghwa’s back. “Yes, I think I can manage that.” He looked around the room taking in everyone’s current mood before demanding their attention, waiting until they were quiet before speaking. “Thursday. Until then we rest. Yunho, you're with Seonghwa. San rest but stay in contact. Mingi, Jongho will be with me and Wooyoung-” He smiled wider when the man straightened up, almost giddy. “You’ll be showing the ropes to our newbie. I briefed you earlier on the task, do make sure she is integrated well. Yeosang as always will keep up surveillance, communication and watching online activity.” He stood up, clapping his hands together. “Go rest up, it’s only monday. Oh and Mingi-” He smiled over at him. “Make sure you both can fucking walk thursday. Dismissed.” _____________________ You didn’t expect to wake up to knocks on your door, and you had no intention of actually getting up and out of bed unless you were finally called back to the Precinct to work. So you rolled over, about to nudge the man on the other side of the bed to have him deal with it, but it was empty.

Frowning, you lifted your head up and looked around the room, Mingi nowhere in sight. Right, it is Monday and he didn't have the day off like you did. Embarrassment flooded you at the thought of him telling the others about you, how you had been practically attached to his cock since Saturday night. You hadn't stopped to think about it, you didn't want to, and it had felt so good to just fuck and not think. You could think about it after some more sleep.

But there was more knocking, whoever it was clearly wasn't going away. And, they wouldn't be at your door unless the knew the code and you only told Hyunjin and registered it with the guard. Sighing you got out of bed, grabbing a house robe as an afterthought to hide the insane amount of hickies and bruises Mingi had left. You were sore, but deliciously so; Hyunjin didn't need to know that.

Hyunjin was not the one at your door though, but Mingi. You frowned, knowing it was still pretty early in the day- plus part of you didn't expect him to come back… didn't want to feel special when he did.

Stomping that feeling down you opened your mouth to greet him but froze up when Yunho leaned around him with a grin. “Damn, you weren’t lying.” You narrowed your eyes, moving to slam the door shut. Mingi’s hand shot through though, forearm getting stuck between the frame and door. Wincing at his grunt of pain, you let it swing back open. “Dumbass.” “Well you were going to shut us out!” He huffed, stepping in and reaching for you. He pouted when you stepped away, swiveling on your heel and putting distance between you and them. “Princess, why the cold shoulder now?” He knew why, you were certain of it, shooting a glare over your shoulder at Yunho who stood behind him. His presence meant you couldn’t just continue what you had been doing. No, now you had to talk. Which meant acknowledging things you weren’t ready to. Yunho lifted a brow, meeting your glare nonchalantly. “I won’t stay for long if I’m in the way of you two fucking, though I am so curious now.” Mingi looked between you two, that wide boba eyed, wet lip look that you thought was adorable on his features. Not that he had shown it often, usually aroundYunho when he wasn’t paying attention to you. But that’s also changed since Saturday. You suspected he only showed such an expression around those he was vulnerable with, and now that he did so in your presence, that would include you. It should stay just as sex, you told yourself, crossing your arms over your chest. “Then why are you here?” Mingi pouted out at your crisp tone, taking a step towards you until Yunho grabbed his arm. It was like a splash of ice water, a needed reminder of just what you were doing: stupid shit. It was stupid to sleep with Mingi, you made yourself vulnerable to him, yet you knew they were still keeping things from you. You weren’t a part of the team just yet, and you would never have what they had. It had your throat closing up, the distance between you was now suffocating. It was just sex.

Yet you didn’t want it to be. 

Mentally cursing yourself, you were saved from the downward spiral of your mind when Mingi did step closer. “I can have him go if you want, but he wanted to make sure I told you about the meeting today.” “Was pretty sure he would get on his knees and try to bury his face in your cunt as soon as he saw you if I didn’t. Though I would not complain if he did.” Yunho clarified, watching you with a now unreadable expression. It was almost calculating, but sympathetic? You didn’t understand, so you didn’t try. Mingi’s reddened ears were far more interesting. “Down that bad for my pussy?” You teased, unable to suppress the smug smirk. “Can you blame me?” He grumbled out hoarsely. “Anyways, you’ll be working with Wooyoung come Thursday.” You relaxed at the change in topic, especially for the topic to be work. Progressive work. “Oh? What will I be doing?” “Only Wooyoung knows that, but he’s the one that is the deepest in undercover, so chances are you’ll be starting your work there. Either stake outs, or being given a target to watch of high interest. The Green Vipers have been acting up so we need to have a good portion of our focus on them, and can’t be neglecting the rest otherwise.” Yunho started wandering around your living space, taking in the changes you have made since you unpacked. He smiled at a few things, which you would have paid more attention to, except Mingi was now right before you. And the fact that yes, you were finally doing your job. You could be crucial, you could do something inside this unit except argue with them and, well, fuck them. Your eyes met Mingi’s, a question in them you couldn’t put into words just yet. So you deflected. “What’s up with the Green Vipers?” Mingi reached out to play with the belt of your robe, waiting for your attention but your eyes were on Yunho as he now circled you both nonchalantly. “They invaded Red Wolves territory, killed a few of their men. San had been part of the-” “San? Is he okay?” Instantly worry filled you, knowing he got hurt so often and if he was involved in something that had others killed- “He’s fine, Butterfly. Resting at home.” Yunho stopped just behind you, leaning over your shoulder until you could feel him barely touching your back. Before you could react, the robe was open and Yunho had a good view of the marks on your neck and shoulder, down your body, and every inch of your naked skin. “Damn, you should be resting too. Mingi did such a number on you. You know he doesn’t like to leave marks on anyone outside the team.” You told yourself to push him away, but the position reminded you of the night at the club and you had so enjoyed being sandwiched between them. “I was resting until someone woke me up.” Mingi chuckled, knuckles tracing the curve of your chest before pinching your nipple in his hand and tugging. Your body reacted immediately, part of you ready to let them have their way.

Jeong Yunho just had to open his damn mouth though. “Chan is the biggest dumbass for letting you get away from him. San too for not fucking you when he had the chance. He heard those sounds and restrained himself?” He scoffed, leaning in to press an open mouth kiss to your neck. Only to meet air as you had slipped out of their reach and pulled your robe tight over your body. “You told him?!” You hissed out at Mingi, furious. You didn’t want your shame known to anyone else, it was a hard enough pill to swallow that Mingi was a part of it. And San? Did San spill the beans of what you did?

Was every ounce of intimacy you shared with them a frat joke to pass around behind your back? Had Mingi gone in detail about the many ways you let him fuck you? About how you had enjoyed it? It made your blood boil simply because you had not been ready to share. Not with most of them. Despite your questionable desires, you had hoped there would be enough respect to keep it between you and the one you had been with… otherwise you felt like a used slut to be passed around.

They seemed to realize how they fucked up, Mingi’s eyes wide while Yunho looked almost apologetic. “Princess I didn’t mean-”

“Save it.” You hissed out, lifting a shaking hand towards the door. “Leave. And do not bother trying to talk to me until I am ready to talk.” Venom laced your words, and from their reactions it hit home.

You watched them leave like pups with their tails between their legs, only when the door was shut did you let out a strangled cry.

How did things get even more complicated?

Taglist (form): @mingsolo | @wowie-hockey | @crispybaguettes | @tiny-apocalypse

| @philijack | @lelaleleb | @isiloiale | @vannabanana1995  | @piratequeen-queenofgames

| @starstruckforyou | @minheeskitten | @amphiroxx  | @cloudysannie | @sugarnspice630

| @sanhwalvr | @plutoneu |  @sousydive |  @fatalt | @iwishiwasrichasfuck

| @bitchwhytho | @st4rhwa | @thesafecafe | @alextheweeb7 | @ddaeing

Taglist will be continued in a reblog!!

[hmhas-00]

Ch. 13

Hit Me Hard & Soft

A/N- Hiii! Remember I will be posting a new chapter every Thursday. If you’d like to be added to a tag list, please let me know! Don’t forget to like and repost! <3

Remy’s POV

I smiled at my reflection in the mirror, trying on the costume that I ordered. I was going to be sexy Scream. Billie was going to her party dressed as Todd from Bojack Horseman and insisted that I dress up as Princess Carolyn, but honestly I just wanted to go for something more… I don’t know, sexy?

I take a picture and send it to her, hoping for approval.

Immediately I get heart eye and fire emojis, followed by a FaceTime call.

I answered, pointing the camera at the mirror and posing in different ways. “What do we think?”

“Hot. But you’d look hotter as Princess Carolyn.” Billie teased.

I rolled my eyes, reverting to front camera again. “Too bad, Todd.” I stuck my middle finger up at her, then set my phone up on my dresser pointing at me from the waist up. “What time are you getting here tonight?” I asked, unzipping my costume.

“Around 10, probably.”

Turning around to face the other wall, I dropped my bodysuit around my ankles. “You still coming over?” I had to repeat myself, figuring she didn’t hear me. “Billie. You still wanna come over later?” I turned around, clipping my bra back on.

“Sorry, yeah. Duh.” She finally answered. “And those cinnamon rolls better be ready when I get there.” She emphasized.

“They will be. I just have to make the icing.” I pulled on some sweats and grabbed the phone, walking over to my kitchen.

“You mind if I bring someone to your party?” I asked, setting the phone down on the counter as I reached for a bowl and ingredients.

“Not at all. Do I know them?” She asked.

Suddenly my phone started buzzing. “Hold up, I gotta get this call. It’s work.”

“Call me back!” Billie said, before I hung up and answered the next call.

“Hey, Rachel, what’s up?” I held the phone between my shoulder and cheek as I mixed the ingredients together.

“Hey, Remy, is this a good time?” She sounded a bit sporadic.

“Uhh, yeah, what’s going on?” I hesitated.

“Sooo… Remember that interview we did for the digital article we were brainstorming for? The one for the app?”

“The one we did with RAYE?” I put the whisk down and adjusted my phone.

“Yes! That one!”

“What about it?”

“So, Joe wants it up by tomorrow. Something about needing to beat People magazine? An insider told him they’re publishing a similar piece with her.”

“Well, yeah, she’s definitely getting more traction.” I said, already knowing what comes next.

“I know you’re gonna hate me, but I really need you to go to the office, get on my computer, and finish the article out. Oh- And set it to be published by tomorrow in the morning!” Her high pitched voice was fast and panicked.

“Rachel, I had plans tonight and-“

“I’d do it myself but I’m all the way in San Diego at this conference thing. Its mostly done, and saved to my drafts. It’s really urgent.” She pleaded, knowing Joe would be extremely pissed if she didn’t follow through.

“Sure, I’ll be on my way in a little bit.”

“Ugh! You’re the best! I owe you one! Don’t forget to credit yourself on the article too!” She squealed.

“Oh, trust me, I won’t.” I rolled my eyes. “I’ll see you later, don’t worry.”

“Love ya, girly! Thanks again!” She hung up.

I groaned, finishing up the icing and shoving the bowl in the fridge. In my room, I threw on a yellow baby tee, some wide legged jeans, and put my hair in a red claw clip. I stopped by the round mirror next to my apartment door to check on my face, fixing the minor details, and walked out with my beige crossbody bag.

At the office when I accessed Rachel’s computer, I quickly realized I had a lot of work to do. I sat for hours editing, deleting, then retyping her work. My eyes were shutting on me as I concluded the article, exhausting my brain to come up with anything impressive.

My phone began to ring, making me jump. I answered the call, my heart racing from the sudden scare.

“Hey, I just landed!” Billie sang.

“Fuck. Hey, I’m sorry, I got so busy and I’m stuck at the office right now-“

“Remy!” She moaned. I could hear her disappointment through the phone.

“No, don’t worry, I’m wrapping it up! Just head over to my place and wait for me in there. You still have my spare key, right?”

“Yeah.” She said, monotoned.

“I’ll be there so soon, just put those cinnamon rolls in the oven and by the time they’re ready, I’ll be there with you.”

“Okay, Rem.” She said goodbye.

I cracked my knuckles and rolled my shoulders back, sitting up straight. I used every single one of my last brain cells to come up with a brilliant conclusion to the article. I let the interview speak for itself and included some quotes from the amazing Raye, but I found myself in the biggest case of writers block I’ve ever had. All I could think about was how much I hated Rachel in this moment for making me do this myself, knowing Joe would give her all the credit.

Eventually, after an hour and a half, I finished what could possibly be the worst article I’ve ever written. It wasn’t bad, just rushed, and I usually don’t work well under pressure. Before posting the article, I stared at the space underneath, where credit is usually given to the writer and editor. I hesitated to delete Rachel’s name, and typed in my own. I stared at it some more, deleting my name and retyping Rachel’s full name, then my name under editor. I sighed, setting the article to be posted tomorrow morning at 8am.

I shut the laptop and grabbed all my things, rushing out the door.

When I arrived at my apartment building, I pressed the elevator button a million times, ending up at my door and unlocking it as fast as I could.

I opened my door, psyched to see my best friend, only to see her passed out on my couch in her comfy clothes. I quietly closed the door, hanging my things on the tiny rack. In the kitchen, was a half empty baking tray with cinnamon rolls. The icing was poured over, and the rolls were starting to get cold. I put them away, covering the top with foil, and cleaned up a little.

I tip toed over to my couch, wondering how she was able to fall asleep on a two seater comfortably. She was curled up in a little ball, with my pastel crocheted blanket covering half of her face. I smiled down at her, feeling awful I made her wait so long alone. I wanted to welcome her home with open arms, and fresh, warm cinnamon rolls.

I turned off the tv, and turned down the lights, leaving only my soft, warm, reading lamp on. I patted her lightly. “Billie… I’m home.” I brushed the hair that fell over her eyes behind her ear, and leaned down to hug her tired body. I buried my face in her neck and took that sweet, familiar scent in, bringing a smile to my face. I wish I could carry her to my bed, but let’s be honest, I don’t have any upper body strength. “You’re so warm, and you smell like cinnamon rolls.” I whispered.

She let out a slight moan and stretched out her curled up feet. Her lashes fluttered open, turning her neck a little as I sat up. “Hi!” I smiled ear to ear.

“Remyyyyy!” She stretched her arms out, wrapping them around my neck.

“Hiii! It’s me!”

“I missed you.” she pulled me into her chest. I crawled on top of her and laid there, propping my head up to see her.

“I know, I’m sorry I made you wait. It was an emergency.”

“You know what else is an emergency?” she said, lifting a brow, jokingly. “Me kicking your ass for not spending any time with me while I’m here.”

“Stop!” I laughed, deep down feeling awful. “No more. I’m all yours for the rest of the weekend.”

She placed both her hands on my face, looking at me for a moment, before squishing my cheeks together. “You better be.”

I placed my hands on top of hers, taking in the moment. I had missed her so much. Nothing was going to keep me from spending time with her. She deserved my undivided attention for making the time to see me. I believe she felt the same, her eyes scanning me as I smiled up at her.

“Okay. I need to see this costume in person.” She broke the silence.

I laughed, “Okay, let’s go.” I stood up, pulling her into my room.

I pulled out the costume and began to undress. Billie sat on my bed, her legs criss crossed. “So, who are you bringing tomorrow?”

“Oh, yeah. I’m probably not gonna bring anyone anymore.”

“Aw, why? They cancelled?” She leaned back on her hands.

“No, it’s not that. I just wanna hang out with you there.” I pulled up my nylon tights.

“Nah, bring your friend, Rem. We can all hang out!” She shrugged.

“Really?” I smiled, squeezing into the tight bodysuit.

“Is it Rachel?” She asked, signaling me over to her so she could zip me up.

“No. It’s this girl.”

“At least it’s not some guy.” She laughed, sliding the zipper up, adjusting my straps.

“Well, no it’s not a guy, but it’s this girl I’ve sorta been talking to.” I admitted, nervously.

I’d never really been in a serious relationship with a woman, at least not in the way I had with a man. I don’t think I’d ever told Billie I tried with girls, despite them being some of my favorite interactions. They were too short lived to bring up. I knew how hesitant she was about my relationships, and didn’t usually bring them around her until it was serious. Especially because I had been used to get near Billie before. Especially by girls.

“Like, as friends?” She turned me around, keeping her hands on my shoulders.

“No…” I pursed my lips.

“Wow! I didn’t know you-“ She blinked rapidly, looking shocked. “That’s awesome, Rem.” She let go, realizing she was still holding onto my shoulder straps.

“Yeah, it’s kinda a new thing, I guess…”

“No, I’m just… Why didn’t you ever tell me? I mean you know I’m-“ She scooted to the edge of the bed, her legs hanging off the side. “I’m sorry, this is just the first I’m hearing of this Remy.” She giggled, her eyes wide.

“Jeez, is it that surprising?” I smacked her tummy.

“Yes!” She laughed. “What’s her name? Who is she?” She pulled me on the bed, desperately trying to gather as much information as she could. “Show me her instagram!”

“Her name’s Stevie. She works at Variety with me. She’s an intern.” I pulled up her instagram showing her my favorite pictures.

“Ouu, cute.” She took the phone from my handed scrolling through her whole profile. “How long has this been a thing? Is it like a serious thing?”

“No, no. We’re just talking. She… I don’t even think she knows I like her like that.” I shrugged, laughing a bit.

“Oh, well she definitely likes you. You look her type.” She handed me back my phone.

“Her type?” I looked at her.

“Yeah, pretty girls with pretty eyes, long hair, and tattoos.” She looked me up and down, pointing at my arm tattoos.

I laughed, getting up and walking over to my body mirror. “I hope so.”

She stayed quiet, watching me look in the mirror.

“So? What do you think?” I looked over my shoulder at her.

“You look stunning. Insane.” Billie smiled at me. I could see her through the mirror, her expression turning blank once I turned.

“Is that why you didn’t wanna be Princess Carolyn with me?”

“Kinda?” I turned to her, shrugging.

“You’re such a loserrr!”

“But I’m a sexy loser.” I held my finger up in the air, making her laugh. I took a couple pictures of myself in the mirror.

“Here.” She offered to take them for me, pulling out her phone. I posed, the flash reflecting off the mirror behind me. She leaned back, getting my best angles, as always.

“Why didn’t you tell me you liked girls?” She asked, her voice soft and quiet.

She sounded a bit hurt, like I hid something from her. I couldn’t help but feel like I kept a part of myself from her.

“Honestly, I don’t know.” I walked over to her, turning around so she could unzip me.

“How long?”

“Mmm… a while. You remember Cassie?”

She nodded.

“We did some things… I think that’s when I realized.”

“You never told me about that!” She crossed her arms.

“I’m sorry! I just didn’t think it was that big of a deal.” I shrugged, stepping out of my costume, pulling off my tights. “It’s not like I had anything serious with any of them. I’ve only ever told you about my serious relationships.”

“Well yeah, but-“ She stopped herself, looking disappointed. I put a giant t-shirt on over my bra and underwear, and hung up my costume for tomorrow. “You tell me everything. I told you…”

“I know.” I climbed on my bed, getting under the sheets. “I thought you kinda knew, I guess.”

“Well…” She crawled over and made herself comfortable next to me. “Now that I know… You better not hit on me.” She joked.

I laughed, grabbing my pillow and hitting her in the face with it. “You wish.” I rolled my eyes.

“Ow! My eye!” She held her face, wincing her eyes.

“Oh shit! I’m sorry!” I grabbed her face, moving her hand so I could see. “I didn’t mean to hurt you!”

“Gotcha bitch!” She licked the side of my face and rolled away, almost falling off the bed. She laughed that crazy, loud laugh I loved so much.

“Oh- Fuck you dude come here!” I kicked my feet into her back, pushing her off the edge as she died of laughter.

I got back in my spot, fluffing my pillow and getting comfortable again. She stood up, pushing her hair out of her face and plopping back on the bed with me. “My stomach hurts from laughing so much.” She put a hand on her tummy, breathing deeply to catch her breath.

My full-size bed was just big enough for the both of us, as long as I kicked off a few of my many pillows. I turned on our show, letting it run in the background as we talked a bit more before falling asleep.

“I’m so happy you’re here.” I smile, still paying attention to the tv.

“Me too.” She said, pausing to laugh at something one of the characters on tv said. “So are you bringing Stevie?”

“Yeah.” I nodded. “Do you think she’ll like my costume?”

“She’s going to die when she sees you.” Her voice sounded genuine.

“Do you think I should ask her out tomorrow?” I looked over at her, putting a hand on my mouth.

She looked at me, not knowing what to say. She bit her bottom lip, shrugging with her eyebrows instead of her arms, since they were warmly tucked under my blankets. “I mean, maybe just wait and see what she says. You don’t wanna push things, you know?” She advised me.

I nodded, looking back at the tv.

“That’s just what I’d do, you know?” Her eyes stayed on me. “But, do whatever feels right.” She added.

“Right.” Nod, snuggling closer to her, laying my head on her shoulder. She yawned, letting me know it was getting late.

A silent while later, I lift my head to see a passed out Billie. After turning my tv and lamp off, I lay my head on my pillow, facing her. She peacefully slept with her mouth slightly open and a furrow on her brows so soft, you could only tell if you looked close enough. I smooth it out with my thumb gently, watching her lick her lips and grunt. Her body turned towards me, our chests parallel to each other. She sloppily threw her arm over me, her fingertips resting on my lower back, which my oversized t-shirt had left exposed. I pulled the bottom hem, attempting to cover up, even though it didn’t matter anyway.

The last thing I saw before shutting my eyes and drifting off, was Billie’s face. She always made soft angry or worried faces in her sleep. I had so many pictures on my camera roll of her funny faces during naps. I smiled thinking about the party tomorrow, and how I get Billie for the rest of the weekend.

I took a mental screenshot of my view and dozed off.

[yanderedrabbles]

I’m a new writer, can you tell me about your writing process? Are you a planner or a pantster?

welcome to the fold child, here be much editing and rewriting and possibly also dragons.

I'm DEFINITELY a planner. Usually I'll start my stories off with whatever inspired me but as soon as I get a handle on the idea, I jot down plot points to direct the story.

I'm also all over the place when I write. For example, I'm currently working on a Wild West noncon with multiple characters. I've been bouncing around from one section to the other as the ideas come. The trick is to try and neaten it all up in post lmao

Since you're asking a bit more about the writing process, here's where I'd recommend starting:

My favourite books on writing:

Voice by James Scott Bell. It's pretty short but there are so many exercises to practice voice and style. It's that little extra thing that really pushes a piece from good to great. For example, Stephen King has one of the most distinctive styles I've read and I gobble it up every. Single. Time.

Save the Cat Writes A Novel by Jessica Brody. This one is THE guide to novel and plot writing. It's fun to read, easy to reference and it breaks different genre tropes down into much more digestible tips. It's also the best guide for plotting, and really runs you through how to structure a story. Even if you aren't working on long, multi-chapter stories, knowing the different story structures is a must. If you take away one recommendation from this list, let it be this one.

My favourite writing YouTubers:

Jenna Moreci. She's funny and no nonsense. She's also got a writing book out called Shut Up and Write The Book that's on my tbr. She dives into common tropes, discusses when they work and when they're cliche, and some of the best ways to subvert them.

Alexa Donne. A romance and YA author, she's absolutely incredible when it comes to newbie writing mistakes. She's also really great at helping you edit and plot your stuff. She weighs in quite a bit on the plotters vs pantsers debate too.

Obviously, the creative process is going to look different for everybody. The key is to just try different approaches and see what works best for you. Some authors like to have all their background info down pat before they start and others can't write well unless its all happening in the moment. Some people like to do huge writing sprints while others aim for a little every day. It's all trial and error to find what works for you.

My biggest trick as a writer is to literally jot down my ideas as soon as they pop up. Sometimes they'll be little snippets, little pieces of dialogue that sound good, scenes that just pop into my head. I have so many notes just dedicated to compiling these ideas. It doesn't matter that I might not use them in my current fic, I always hold onto them for later.

I'd recommend looking at some famous author writing routines and pulling ideas from there too. Personally, I try and write a little everyday and then do at least two rounds of editing before I post.

I've still got a TON of room for improvement, but those are kind of the seminal works that got me to this point.

That's all. Have fun babe! May the words always come easy, may the editing be ruthless and may the readers be cool as hell. 💕

[sweetimpurity]

On the Run 3

w.c. 2.2k NSFW Chapter 1 Chapter 2

a/n: MDNI and some violence at the end. I recommend rereading the previous chapters and keeping an eye out for edits. ♥️

Chapter 3

“C’mere baby… it’s okay now…” He sighs, reaching for you across the seat. Glancing subtly out the rearview window to make sure you’re actually in the clear as you melt into him. Cuddling into his chest. “It’s alright….” He coos, rubbing your back, his hands going under his jacket, feeling your warm skin underneath. Rubbing his hands over your bare skin. His eyes scanning around the car. Just to be sure. 

He feels like a prick for making you go through all that. Bringing you to orgasm and then sending you into a state of pure panic. He should be laying in bed with you, holding you until you fall asleep. Giving you the aftercare you deserve. Instead he’s holding you in the darkness of his car, hiding and feeling you shaking in his hands. The adrenaline is pumping hard and strong. Hearts beating hard and fast. “Mig…” You sigh, lifting your head and kissing his cheek, nuzzling your lips against his jaw and into his neck. “You okay, sweet girl?” His hand caresses the back of your neck, pulling your head up to look in his eyes. 

Breathless, you take his hand, pressing it flat against your chest to feel your drumming heart. Looking in your eyes, and he can feel it. So hard and quick. Your breath hitches in a silent needy sob, pressing your lips to his. Fingers instantly roaming his cheeks, his neck, his dark curls. His strong arms anchor around your lower back, pulling you further onto him, straddling his lap. 

Maybe it’s the adrenaline, maybe it’s the thrill, or maybe it’s the hormones flooding your bloodstream from him making you come less than 20 minutes ago. But you need him. He didn’t even come the first time. He was so focused on you, and then so concentrated on getting you two out of there. But you desperately want to make him feel good. Your hips push down on him. Drawing a soft puff of breath from his lips.”Baby…” Against your lips. “We don’t have to…” He sighs. Knowing exactly what you’re thinking. Knowing you’re both all wound up. “I want to…” You whisper breathy and needy. Grinding on him a little harder. 

“You take such good care of me, Miguel…” You hum, tugging on his hair just gently, his head pulled back on the edge of the bench seat. Eyes still on you. “Let me take care of you…” You whisper, nuzzling into his neck, kissing his skin. Hearing his breath get heavier, deeper. His eyes flutter shut. Trying to block out the anxiety of getting caught, of you being hurt. Just letting his mind flood with you, the smell of your shampoo, the feeling of your warm flushed skin under his fingertips, the sound of your voice. As if it’s the last time he’ll ever feel you. You’re all he’s ever wanted. 

His big hand moves from your thumping heartbeat, down your chest to your soft naked breasts. Both hands coming up to cup the soft roundness. Under the privacy of his jacket you’re wearing. He cups your soft mounds in his big hands. The weight and warmth perfect against his palms. And you want him to put his hands all over you. 

He’s always so generous; so giving; all attention on you. But just this time you really want to make it about him. Make him feel good. You lean back, his dark eyes flick down to his hands on your chest, the plump and plush of your tits. Rubbing his thumbs over your nipples, pulling soft sweet moans from your lips. 

Without another thought, he leans forward, tongue pressing flat against your breast and lips pursing and kissing your soft skin. “Hahhhh…” You sigh, trembling from the adrenaline and the feeling of his tongue on your sensitive skin. Giving equal attention to each side, lapping, kissing and sucking until his fingers curl and tug in your hair, pulling back and looking over your chest at his work. Your tits glistening with his saliva in the faint moonlight peeking out through the trees, coming in through the car windows. 

His eyes go to your face, looking down at him with that same face he always loves. Like you could cry at any moment, or come just as easily. Flushed cheeks and eyes like glossy glass marbles, so pretty and innocent. When he breaks away and looks at your face, you smile needy and lean in closer. Kissing his lips softly and then pressing your forehead to his. You look down and he does the same when he realizes your intention. Your fingers on his belt buckle, so hastily buckled, undoing it slowly, his fingers in your hair, teasing down the back of your neck. It’s too dark to see clearly, but you can feel it as you free him from his jeans, heavy and stiff for you. His breath hitching when he feels the soft palm of your hand. With the other hand, you reach down between your legs, collecting your slick on your fingers. Still so wet from earlier, and Miguel didn’t have a chance to help you clean up. He grows impossibly harder at the faint sight of your own glimmering wetness on your hands. 

He gives you an almost pleading look, breathless and already on the edge. Shuddering when you start to stroke his length, the heel of your palm massaging his tip every time you pull back. The slick on your hand making it even harder for him to bear. 

He’s so generous, so giving and protecting that you’re not usually given the chance to please him like this. Because it’s always all about you with him. You’re surprised he's giving you this chance. 

He breathes sharply through his nose as you take control, and he’s not used to it but he’ll give you anything and everything. His hands go back to your waist as you keep working your hand faster, trying to quickly bring him into release, in the same generosity he showed you earlier. He groans and looks down at your hands before putting his hands over yours and stopping you. “Miguel, I’m just-” You huff. Prepared to scold him to just let you make him feel good for once. But you're silenced with a kiss and his breathless words. 

“Need to be inside you, baby” He pants and you gaze deeply in his eyes, wanting to give him anything he needs. With his hands on your hips still, you kneel, pushing your shorts to the side, positioning him at your entrance, hovering over his lap before slowly sinking down on him. Even though you just had him inside you a little while ago, he still stretches you, making you gasp. His jaw drops, eyes glued to yours and he watches you hungrily as you begin to move on his dick slowly. He swallows thickly and speaks low in his deep voice. “Faster baby…” He begs but he doesn’t tighten his grip on you, he’s giving you a chance to do this, he knows you're trying your hardest to do this for him and he thinks it’s adorable. It’s not gonna last long though because no matter what he plans on fucking your breathless even if you wants it to he ‘just for him’.  

You try to move faster like he asks but it becomes harder for you to resist the pleasure and focus on him. Biting your lip to stop from moaning but his cock is just so big and perfect that it’s hard not to come immediately. But you want to try for him. All for him.  

“Faster” He whispers and finally he leans forward and wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you down harder and deeper onto him, making you moan out. You've been trying to keep quiet so that he’ll allow you to do this for him. But he knows you too well, and he doesn’t care, all he cares about is you. 

He starts quickly fucking his hips up into you, instantly making you pant like an animal, your hands pressed to his chest. Pouting, huffing, whining now that he’s ruined your plan. “Cmon babygirl… just let me do the work…” He pants, smiling and he keeps pounding his hips up into your cunt. “Wait!…wait wait…” You whimper and he slows his movements so you can speak properly. “What is it?” He asks softly, brushing some hair behind your ear, pumping into you slowly still. “Th-this was s-supposed to be for y-you…” You manage to say, wrapping your arms around his neck and leaning in close to him. He smiles at your completely fucked out face, kissing your lips softly.

“This is for me, baby…” He says softly and picks up the rhythm again, making you moan and your back arch over him. He gets all the pleasure he needs watching your perfect pretty face, getting fucked senseless on his dick. “Mmm!” You squeal and sigh, his fingers brushing over your tummy, your sternum, caressing your breasts and making everything all the more tantalizing. 

“Please Miguel…” You beg him and he knows what you want. If he won’t let you be in control, he can at least let himself come for you. He moans softly, letting his head fall down into your chest as he allows himself to succumb to the feeling.

 “I’m… I-“ You gasp and he feels you squeezing around him, knowing you’re close. Knowing you want him right there with you. You lean forward, overcome with pleasure and hold his face with your two hands, letting your lips ghost past his cheek and to his ear. “Miggy please…” You whimper and this pushes him over the edge, both hands squeezing your hips as he pulls your down hard on him. Rolling his hips up in short pulses, pumping his load deep into you with a shuddering, rasping groan.  And you smile, feeling it in your tummy; the warmth of him spilling out into your womb. 

He lets his back hit the car seat as he twitches inside you and your walls spasm in aftershocks. “Oh.. thank you, baby… thank you…” You whisper and kiss his face all over. He’s tired now and all he does is let his head hit the headrest and let you pepper his cheeks, his lips, his forehead and jaw with countless kisses. “I love you” You breathe out and collapse, letting your head rest on his shoulder. “I love you…” He whispers, warm hands caressing the expanse of your back and holding you so close. Just his voice alone makes you want him like this over and over again.

“I’m gonna keep us safe, baby… I promise.” He whispers. A bittersweet twist in his chest. Thinking of the things they might have to do. That he’ll have to do. 

If he’d never been involved with the gang, then you wouldn’t be in this situation. But it was inevitable. Your brother, the guys, they all were family to him. You were his family. Growing closer since he was initiated. When he was 17 and you were 16. Years passed and when he realized he'd fallen for you, he wanted to give you better than all this. Better than you’ve always had. You don't deserve the anxiety, the chaos; uncertainty. You deserve love and stability and he wants to give that to you. Far away from all of this. He’s still haunted by your brother's face. Tyler staring at him like he’d just stabbed him in the back. When he told him he was done. 

… 

“So you fuck my little sister and then that’s it? That’s all, you’re just done? Got what you wanted?” Tyler yelled, backing up from the punch he just landed on Miguel’s jaw. Miguel sighed, wiping his bloodied lip, backing up to a safer distance. 

“I gave you everything you’ve got, you’d be nothing without me.” The boss seethed, feeling betrayed. But it was not Miguel’s intention. 

“I want to take her away from all this…” Miguel sighs, flinching when Tyler looks like he’ll hit him again for saying what he just did. “I can’t do that and still be looking over my shoulder waiting for the cops! I need to get away clean, Ty!” 

“If you want to leave, then leave. See how long you make it out there without the protection I’ve been giving you all this time.” 

“What about her?? I need to make sure she’ll be safe!” Miguel yells.

“She’s not going with you! You’re done with her. Say goodbye and leave. She's staying here. Where she's meant to be.” Tyler says in finality. 

“You… can’t do that!”

“I can do anything I want… and she'll have nothing to do with a traitor like you.” 

“Traitor?” Miguel scoffs, hurt by the accusation. He'd always been loyal, always. “I brought you into my operations all those years ago and this is how you repay me?” Tyler asks seriously. He’s not being fair. Using his power to enforce whatever rules he sees fit. 

“I love her.” Miguel says firmly, unwavering.

“Well it’s over now. Just leave. And if I find out you’re messing with her, I’ll see to it myself that you have no working legs to walk away with."

…

His arms tighten around you at the memory. The reminder of all the things he’s already had to do to get away and take you with him. To just be with you. He’ll do everything in his power to not let those efforts go to waste. 

To be continued…

@safixiovi @daddyfroglegs @laysmt @theplaid-wearingmoose @lazyjellyfish300

@reader-1290 @webshooterrr9

[camilasstories]

❝feeling unreciprocated❞ prologue | jungkook x reader (edited version 2025)

summary: Heartbreak was never a plan, but now it's the essence of her existence. Sleeping with one guy seemed like a way to escape the hurt—but sleeping with another, then another, only made things worse. Especially with her handsome crush right behind the wall, watching her spiral and just as confused as she is about her messy ways of coping with a broken heart. As she struggles to move on, the deeper she digs, the clearer it becomes: the only person who truly understands her may be the one she’s been avoiding all along.

important: hello! in case you're wondering what's going on - it's edited and reactivated version of "feeling unreciprocated". i also left a note for readers about taglist thing down the chapter. long time no see 🥹🩷

🩷 SERIES MASTERLIST

you've read a trailer / you're reading prologue / you probably want to read chapter 1

Loud, pulsating techno blasted through the speakers, vibrating my body with every beat, as I squeezed my way through the sea of sweaty college students. The air was thick with the stench of alcohol and bodies pressed too close together, each person moving in sync with the music, their hands raised and faces flushed with excitement. I glanced around, but something felt off. These faces, they weren’t familiar. Strange, considering I was sure I’d recognize anyone in my year, but most of them didn't even have to show up to any of the classes. President's palm greased, and voilà, here I was attending every single lecture knowing they could get me expelled for whatever reason they could find and those moneybags always putting their feet up.

The infamous half-year blowout. A party that seemed to capture the essence of every college student's reckless abandon—each year represented, from the first-years still fresh with excitement to the second and third-years fully entrenched in the rhythm of campus life. It was a massive spectacle, a celebration where nothing mattered except the promise of getting lost in the chaos. Students from every corner of the campus, and even from nearby colleges, poured in with a single purpose: to get wasted and miss some classes the next day with a perfect excuse to feed the professors.

And there I was, right in the middle of it. The music was loud, a constant pulse in the air, the thumping bass vibrating through my chest. Colorful lights flashed across my face, each blink of neon hues blurring the edges of my reality. Every inch of space seemed occupied by the smell of sweat, cheap beer, and way too much heavy, expensive perfume so characteristic of those rich kids.

I didn't get lost, but somehow my friends— or more precisely Gia and her crowd—, managed to miss me on their way for another round of drinks. Magneta pink, baby blue, malachite green and scarlet red. The entire palette rainbow shots, each with a fanciful name, lined up and ready to leave you feeling miserable the first thing in the morning.

I wasn’t a seasoned drinker—far from it. The alcohol in my system was beginning to swirl uncomfortably, a hot, acidic tide in my stomach that made everything feel like it was spinning. Getting drunk had never been my thing, but tonight? Tonight, I’d been swept up in the moment, forgetting downs of my life. I had Gia to thank for that, or rather, curse her name. Her "potions" had left me feeling more than just buzzed, but completely unsteady.

Then, the unthinkable happened. I bumped into something solid.

A hard body. I didn’t need to look up to know it was a person.

"Sorry," I mumbled, trying to steady myself, but my mouth felt strange. There was a tight, acid-like burn in my throat. God, I hoped I wasn’t about to—

“You good?” came a voice, thick with uncertainty.

I took a deep breath, but it did nothing to ease the churning in my stomach. My mind raced, trying to regain some semblance of control. That slight bump was just enough to make me want to puke.

"I think—" I started, only to be interrupted by the sudden urgency in my body. "I think I’m gonna—"

“Oh, fuck.” His voice was tinged with panic as he backed away slightly.

And that was it. The most mortifying moment of my life, far worse than being caught using the male's toilet. It was like a sickeningly slow-motion realization, as each part of my body tried to fight back the overwhelming mixture of shame and panic, but the damage was done.

I had almost thrown up on him. Almost.

"I'm so-, so sorry, I didn't mean-" I winced at the acid burning in my throat reminding my of my foolish, greedy consumption.

My face hot from humiliation, a deep flush spreading across my cheeks. I could almost hear the phantom whispers of those around me—imaginary voices feeding my embarrassment.

"Easy. Just take a breath," the voice came again, smooth and calm, but my head was still hanging down, just in case.

"I've almost thrown up on you," I muttered, my voice barely above the whisper and my chest clenched with anxiety.

"It was hard not to notice, yeah" he replied, his tone laced with a dry humor. "Good for me for the 'almost'".

A shaky laugh escaped my lips, but I was far from being amused, only feeling like the weight of the world just landed on my shoulders.

"You should be mad," I mumbled, unraveling a tipsy chit-chat. "Or at least disgusted. I’ve made such a mess." A quiet groan escaped me, the taste of regret bitter on my tongue.

"If it’ll make you feel better, I’ve seen worse," he said, completely unfazed, as if my near-disastrous state was nothing out of the ordinary. "You’re actually doing great," he added, a hint of amusement in his voice. "For a first-year student—which I’m guessing you are."

"Is it that obvious?" I wiped up the corner of my lips with the end of my sleeve.

He smirked. "Just a little".

"Did anyone see me?" I couldn't hide I was getting more and more nervous, as the fresh air was slowly sobering me up. "It was so fucking embarrassing".

He chuckled, leaning against the nearby table with an easy confidence. "Relax. No one’s paying attention."

I let out a breath I hadn’t realized I was holding. "Are you sure? Because it felt like the entire room was watching me crash and burn."

He tilted his head, pretending to consider it. "Well, if they did, they’ve already moved on. I've learnt people have short attention spans."

I tried to take a deep breath, but my head was still spinning, and there was that nagging feeling in my stomach. The alcohol had done its job, but I wasn’t sure it was finished yet. And somehow, his presence—his steady, unbothered aura—was oddly comforting.

"Besides, embarrassment is just a state of mind."

"You're telling me I've just made the situation up in my head?"

"Not exactly. What I'm saying is that it's not a big deal".

For a moment, the world stilled and I dared to lift my head and take a better look at my companion. The instant rush of vertigo that followed was immediate and unforgiving, but that wasn’t what made my breath hitch.

It can't be...

Even in that state, I couldn't mistake him.

I swallowed hard, still embarrassed beyond belief, but the alcohol coursing through my veins gave me a strange sort of confidence.

“You’re Jeon Jungkook. Like, the Jeon Jungkook?” I asked, almost incredulously.

He raised an eyebrow, amusement flashing in his eyes. "Since my mother named me, yeah." A small chuckle slipped from his lips, and it was so effortless, so natural, that I found myself calming just by listening to it. "And you are...?"

Before I could answer, another wave hit me, and all I could do was turn and, well, let my body betray me again, this time making sure I puked far from his sneakers.

“We’ll get to that later,” I heard behind me, his tone steady and amused, though not unkind.

Thank you, Gia for that nightmare.

taglist: @betysotelo18, @smwhrinthehaze, @goldiemess, @jksusawife, @imurfantassy (I'm sorry, loves! I'm aware it's been a long time since I updated any chapter. If you're no longer want to be added on a taglist or it bothers you or anything, just let me know I'll correct it 🩷)

feeling unreciprocated, edited version 2025 - 01.04.2025

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Off the Page 2

Warnings: non/dubcon and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

Characters: skinny!Steve

Part of the Bookstore AU

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

You take a page out of Maria’s book and sleep on the train. The night at the hotel wasn’t long enough. By the time you ate, you were too tired to enjoy the fancy tub and your alarm woke you well before you were ready. As your stop comes, you’re still groggy and barely ready for your evening meet and greet. 

Isn’t this the dream? Running yourself ragged as a bestselling author? Seeing all the fans who love the words that you wrote? Who see themselves in the characters you created? So much a dream that you feel as if you’re falling asleep again. 

Wake up! You splash water over your face in the bookstore bathroom. It’s not glamourous. You have the small space to refresh before you face the masses. You hoped for a smaller crowd given the time of day and the lesser known location. How wrong you are; you can hear the buzz of fans through the walls. 

“Hey,” Maria enters without knocking. She’s like that. You and your agent have gotten rather cozy in those last weeks. A bit too much at times. “Almost ready?” 

“Yeah, sorry, I... is this blouse okay?” You ask as you touch the satin, patterned with violets, “I don’t even know why I bought this?” 

“It looks fine,” she assures, “you’re not a writer if you’re not at least a little eccentric, right?” 

“Oh, and what about book agents?” You challenge, “are they all so stylish?’ 

“Of course. We’re the face that sells the tour. All you have to do is smile and sacrifice your hand to carpal tunnel syndrome,” she teases, “just you wait until the interview. That's the heavy lifting.” 

“Interview?” You check yourself one last time in the mirror. 

“Didn’t I mention? The local station wants a sit down before we’re off tomorrow,” she explains, “I said yes. It’s a decent check and good business. Any publicity is good publicity. Publisher signed off on it too so... can’t back out.” 

“Oh, and you were going to tell me when?” 

“Right now,” she shrugs, “come on, your adoring fans are waiting for their elf queen.” 

“Oof, don’t,” you cringe, “you make it sound so lame.” 

“If it was lame, you wouldn’t be here,” she asserts. 

“Suppose you’re right,” you pack your things up into your bag and shove it in the corner. “Alright, I’m ready.” 

You follow her into the hall and through to the main area of the bookstore. It’s been closed early for the event, a meet and greet exclusive to those who claimed the limited one hundred tickets for sale. Each ticket includes the cost of a free signed edition and bookmark. Funny to think you’d once been on the other side of one of these things. The eager beaver reader aspiring to be the star author. 

As you come into sigh of the audience, they cheer. You’re still not used to that either. You wave and smile out at them. The moderator, an employee of the bookshop chain, calls for their attention over the microphone and introduces you. There’s another softer round of applause. 

You take your seat on the stool and let out a breath. You start with the reading. You try not to do the same chapter, instead cycling through your favourites. Some you even know by rote now. 

Then comes the Q and A session. You know all the answers. You find it’s always the same questions. Besides, you created this world, these characters, if there isn’t anything written, then you get to decide. 

A group a giggly women finish asking their questions about the ‘rumoured’ sequel to which you give your PR friendly deflection. After them, you wait for the next person to appear. There’s some scuffling at the microphone as they lower it. You wait patiently and smile at the slender blond man. He’s vaguely familiar. 

“Hi, um, my question is, whether Emeris is truly the promised knight or if he was just in the right place at the right time?” 

You nod as you listen, your thoughts whirring. It’s not an entirely out-there question. It isn’t what he’s asking that gives you pause. You swear you’ve seen him before. 

“Well, we can’t know for sure. I like to think of the promised knight as not a specific person fated from birth but rather a possibility for all. The promised knight is the one who can step up in that time of need and do what it is needed,” you explain. “I hope that makes sense.” 

The man doesn’t speak right away, himself stalling before he can respond, “yes, I guess it does. Thank you.” 

He lingers at the microphone for a moment as he watches you. He clutches a worn copy to his chest tightly. That’s familiar too. 

Strange. You're sure there’s lots of people who double dip. You have to admit you did it once yourself. Sometimes you just need that thrill.  

The blond man steps back and lets the next person ahead of him but he doesn’t go far. He stays close to the queue of people and you feel him staring you down. Everyone is watching you but his gaze just feels so much more intense. You do your best to focus on the person at the microphone. 

Several others ask their questions or just give their praise. The man remains. You can’t shake the sense of him. He’s like a shadow. You don’t know why you’re so aware of him. 

Finally, you finish up and it’s time to announce the special prize. It’s a raffle set up by ticket number. The package isn’t anything special; a collector’s edition, a mug, and some pens that look like quills. The moderator brings up a box filled with slips and you reach inside. You read out the number and the crowd mutters. 

“Me,” a deep voice rings out, a hand popping up from lower down. The blond man steps forward and waves his ticket, “it’s mine.” 

Strange coincidence. You keep your smile plastered on. You don’t need another Maria lecture about your tired moping. You’re handed the prize basket and you carry it down to meet the man. 

“Congratulations,” you say as he meets you at the lip of the low platform. 

“Thank you,” he beams up brightly, “it’s nice to see you again.” 

You try not to show your surprise, “yeah, uh... you too.” You don’t know what else to say. You don’t remember exactly where you saw him and definitely not a name; you hear too many of those to keep track. 

“Really?” He breathes. 

“Er, enjoy your prize. Thank you so much for coming.” 

“Of course. Always. Anytime,” he avows shakily. “’To you, my queen, I bid my blood and breath.’” 

You hesitate. That’s from the book. Emeris proclaims it to the elvish protagonist on her quest to reclaim her stolen homeland. It’s flattering yet slightly unsettling to have it recited to you. 

“Have a good night,” you say gently and turn to walk back across the platform. You’re tired, you need to get out of here.