#it was honestly kind of sad because the place has had literally no maintenance and there were leaves everywhere

[graciousdragon]

healing my middle school self by going on a walk and watching my town's waterfall while listening to northern downpour

[sebastard69]

5.1-5.4 Thoughts

There's still two hours left until maintenance ends, so let's get some of those feelings out!

- I like the whole arc about Chai-Nuzz becoming the mayor of Eulmore, and I especially liked how in his speech he said he would only be holding office temporarily while Eulmore learned how to stand on its own again. The Chais are so cool and sweet and I very much have a lot of adoration for them.

- Literally fuck Anamnesis Anyder, that dungeon can suck my dick, holy shit. The boss mechanics made no fucking sense and were so hard to react to in a timely manner. Doesn't help that being a caster means I'm slow as fucking shit so even if I DID react at the right time, I might have still gotten fucking murked. That said, it was wonderfully cinematic leading up to the actual building, and that was very cool. Thank god the gear looks like garbo so I'm not of a mind to grind for it.

- Everything with Elidibus had me in tears. His little "test" that he runs you through was so good and so emotional. Every time new friends popped up, I was terrified he was going to ask me to kill them like he did with Thancred, Yda, Papalymo, and Y'shtola, and genuinely if he had made me fight Haurchefant I would have lost my mind. Fighting Nidhogg also fucked me up, because it wasn't just Nidhogg. The whole sequence was absolutely brilliant. I'm angry that he took Ardbert's face, it's unfair and underhanded and infuriating. But knowing that everything he's doing he's doing because he's lost sight of what started him on this path is genuinely kind of heartbreaking? He doesn't remember who he made his promise to, he doesn't remember why he's fighting so hard. He has all these emotions, all this pain and sadness and fear, and he can't fully remember why he's on the path he's on. That's heartbreaking.

- Emet-Selch knew. He knew he wasn't going to win our fight, he knew we would beat him. He set us on the path of Elidibus on purpose because he knew his friend was suffering, and the only way to end it was for us to kill him. Hythlodaeus gave us Azem's crystal because Emet-Selch wanted us to have it, but couldn't give it to us directly, and that crystal is what made it possible to defeat Elidibus. It makes me wonder how much of what he said after Vauthry's fight was true - had he ever been considering taking us on as allies, or had this been his plan to begin with? Varis once said that even when he thought he was moving counter to Emet-Selch's machinations, in the end he would find he had played right into his hands anyway. Did he ever really find us pathetic for our inability to contain the Light, or did he know we would never be able to in the first place? He didn't take G'raha because he wanted all the wisdom the Tower held, he was the reason Allag existed in the first place he didn't need that knowledge. It was a ruse. Offering us a place to transform in peace was also a ruse, a backup in case we didn't come rushing to our friend's aid. The whole thing was a farce, Emet-Selch playing the part of a villain because we needed him to be and because he knew there was no winning were we to clash like that. And that, honestly, has me so fucked up inside. I very seriously love this character with all my heart.

- "Remember we once lived" and "The rains have ceased, and we have been graced with another beautiful day. But you are not here to see it." are going to be lines that even years from now will bring tears to my eyes. They're so... raw, so emotional.

- Why did everyone get a heartfelt goodbye cutscene except Urianger >:(

- I knew it was going to be ok, I knew since he'd imbued his memories into the soul vessel before Elidibus came and fucked everything up that it would be ok in the end, but god fucking damn the post-Seat of Sacrifice cutscene had me blubbering. Oh my god.

- Heroe's Gauntlet was a frustrating dungeon, but really cool narratively and also very cinematic. I hope that becomes like the Norm for dungeons going forward, like trials got really cinematic starting in Stormblood (with Lakshmi, I believe, though I would argue the Shiva fight in 2.2? 2.3? is a bit cinematic as well, or maybe i'm just a slut for that frozen step move) and have just gotten more so, which super cool.

- ok but like, seriously, G'raha is totally in love with the WoL right? Like between the conversation on the hill in Kholusia, and his reactions to the WoL just saying his name, and how eager he is to spend time with the WoL in general, it seems so obvious to me. And the WoL is totally in love with him, too! I mean listen. Bringing back the soul vessels for Thancred and everyone at the Rising Stones, the WoL is even-paced and solemn and all that. The second they're reminded that they can go wake up G'raha, though, they don't even wait for Urianger to finish talking before they're literally sprinting all the way to the Crystal Tower. That's love baybey!

- I'm glad to see the city-states making an effort to make amends with the beast tribes, and the fact Alisaie figured out a cure for tempering is mind boggling. It's refreshing to hear Merlwyb admit that the best option for peace in Eorzea is by making peace with the beast tribes, and admitting that the conflict is Limsa's fault to begin with. In ARR when Y'shtola confronts her about it, her reaction was less than acceptable, in my opinion.

Only 5.5/5.55 left before Endwalker! So hype! Very excited to learn more about Azem and Hythlodaeus and the other Ascians in general. Ready to cry my fucking eyes out!

[calypsoff2]

Seven. Part 2

Watching TJ walk off to go on my jet, oh that wasn’t what I thought was going to happen. I am stood with my mouth hung open in shock, TJ did a u-turn and jogged back over as I am still stood here in utter shock to my core, am I allowing this asshole to be this way. I am only remaining calm for my man; I don’t think he understands that part. I am literally going to go crazy on this man, I am just going crazy “look, I am sorry. I don’t want this beef with you, you’re a sister to me Robyn. I have said things that I don’t mean but I feel attacked, you’re a big persona and I understand you feel like I have done bad by Chris, but I haven’t, I ride for your husband to the end. I love him so much; he has done so much for me, and I am blessed by that. I don’t want this between us because I know you have a lot of power over things” crossing my arms across my chest “what did you come back? To just say that to me?” I am confused “because I feel bad, but I feel like you got beef with me. I have always supported Chris, even with Barry. It’s me that was there for Chris, always. I know how much he loves you, from jump” I need to show him how a real bitch is “didn’t you call me forehead in school? Or was I dreaming that? Didn’t you want me to not be around, you always made jokes about me. You went out of your way to make Chris not see it for me in school. I remember it but I let it go, you were nasty to me. Now you’re the same niggas lusting over me, I suggest you apologise. And you do it in front of Chris. While on the jet I am paying for, got it?” Looking down at him, I am like squaring up to him, but he has angered me a lot. I did like TJ but now he’s being a dick for no reason, he didn’t need to be like this “your husband just came out of hospital and you’re stressing him out? Your lifestyle ruined Barry, and Chris lost him. Still, Chris misses him and you making him do that again? It always makes me think that my friend has any balls, but he just leaves them in your hands, maybe I was right about you then. I am here trying to apologise, and you can’t even accept that. Mel is such a good person to live in your shadow, I know your vibe. Pretty girls are the worst, light skinned ones actually. I don’t really see how you both worked, I don’t get it because my friend, my Chris. He was the boss, and his ego would have overpowered yours, you broke that down. You sat there looking at me like shit; you had no right when I did nothing wrong Chris chose to give me that, we have that bond. We boys, he can speak to me about a lot, I don’t know about you miss busy” oh I want to punch him “can we just get on, sorry” balling my fist up “what is going on here” Jen said, I want to kill him, I really do.

I just felt like I was in school there, I had a major flashback to when I was at school. I didn’t have a good time at school in general, the only time I did have a good time was when Chris was there for me, just honestly it was Chris that made my school life bearable, but it was short lived, and he honestly is a good guy with shit people around him. He was always kind of talked out of being with me, friend wise and he always said it’s because you’re pretty that is why “earth calling Robyn?” Jen said, bringing me back to the fact I am stood in the middle of the hanger, and everyone is on the jet “what happened?” She said again, looking at the jet “just, I.” I paused saying “I don’t know what to do” I openly admitted “about what?” Jen is confused, she doesn’t know what has happened and I don’t blame her “I think we should go on the jet, we can talk then” Jen’ face softened “hey, oh my god. Why are you sad” waving her off “don’t” I said, I don’t need to be crying right at this moment. Suck it up Robyn, Jen held my hand as we made our way to the jet. I don’t want to hold the jet back now, but TJ and I really don’t speak like that anyways. I keep him there and I am here, I don’t agree with Chris paying for him all the time so I just stayed away from the situation and stuck to what I need to do but it’s too much and this really hit home, Camron is not my son and I feel like he’s making jibes at me thinking Camron is owed a life and owed to be in my family because I can’t give Chris that, I am sick “sorry girls” I held the jet up, Rylee looks unimpressed “mommy I want to sit next to daddy, or you are?” Rylee asked, shaking my head “I need to speak to auntie Jen, I’ll be in the back ok. You can sit there” making my way to the back “but Camron is there” I let out a deep sigh, of course he is there “then sit with Tianna, she is watching YouTube” I don’t have the patience to say anything right at this moment, I am just going to snap if I speak on it.

Jen turned to me “speak, what was that all about? All I heard was about having balls and the conversation seemed really deep into it?” I am of course going to tell Jen, that is my best friend, and I will always confide in her “we have the time, so Chris and TJ are friends, you know the whole background on that. They came up together that whole story thing, Chris gave TJ his clothing line to handle which I have no issues with, then move on a few years. Seiko, now this is Chris’ ex that loved him a lot, maybe still does love Chris but she actually got pregnant by TJ to piss Chris off now that shit popped off bad, I remember when it happened. Chris was hurt by it, it’s a bro code thing but it was over with, all forgiven so like we moved on. Seiko was neglecting Camron, I felt bad to hear that. She was using the child maintenance on not so good things but come to think of it, TJ never put them in a nice home. He paid and that’s it, Chris came to me and said I am upset, that is nephew. He comes here and has a good time but goes back to shit, school has been saying he doesn’t go and stuff. So I gave my lawyer, they won the case. Me, I did that, but Chris was happy. Don’t forget Chris has given the business to him, keep that in mind. Now we did this case, my lawyer, my bill. I didn’t get a thanks, no. It was Chris, he said a thanks, but I have other shit going on anyways so it’s whatever. Then Chris tells me oh TJ is living in the apartment complex just down the road, ten minutes away. Oh right ok, oh I erm just helped him to get it. He needs the help; Black Pyramid is behind. I said right, then help him silent partner. So TJ started to sell tees where it had Chris’ face and designs on, they sold out quick and he promoted it, I go Chris is he paying you back, oh yeah yeah. He didn’t, then Chris comes and says Camron is amazing at Basketball, you know people” Jen gasped pointing “you called me to say about the academy, it was for him?” Jen said, nodding my head “mommy I want juice” I was so deep in the conversation “Imani, please go to daddy. Ask him” I want to finish this conversation off.

Nodding my head “it was for him, I helped him. Got him into it, Chris thanked me. And this situation happened because Chris went to the Fenty Christmas party with TJ and Camron, Mel was there. He gave the SUV to them to go home, Mel was unwell apparently. I say that because Mel didn’t say that to me, she said they went out for some food. They went out in that SUV all around New York, knowing Chris needed that SUV, it was his. He got in the Uber because of them, Mel was literally is being shady as fuck about this. But anyways, so deep inside I am fucking angry. I am giving sly looks, TJ caught on. Because why is my husband putting himself out there for a child not his? So TJ pulled me to the side and said you been looking at me crazy, it’s not nice. I said it to him what it is, you are using my man, that is your child. He started speaking on me, he said maybe if you gave him that son” my voice broke “maybe if you give him what he wants maybe he won’t do that, he just started poking at it knowing I lost the baby. Then out there he mentioned it, like sorry I said what I said but me and Chris are close we speak on things. If you give him that, like pressurising me for this” Jen shushed me because my voice is now becoming even more strained “say something?” Jen said “he mentioned I broke their relationship, then leave my husband with no friends. He adores him Jen” her face softened “but you’re his wife” she retorted “and maybe I should have stayed in my place, I shouldn’t have gave him looks, you know” I sniffled “I get it but he has no right to speak on your body, you have lost two babies. That is some nasty ass shit to say, I want to knock his fucking block off” I laughed a little “he wasn’t always a fan of us to be honest, I kind of got in the way in school. It’s just like the same vibe, I kept out of the way, I have been too busy for this shit. Now I am home and here, I see it. I just left it alone, I did” wiping my tears, Jen’ eyes widened looking behind me. Looking to the side of me Chris is just hovering over me. I feel like I got caught “what is happening here?” wiping my tears “we are just having lady talk now Chris, come on” Chris frowned “my wife is crying, why? Robyn why are you crying” now I am panicking because I just don’t want to do this, I am here trying to open up to Jen “Robyn, hey. Talk to me” I can’t, getting up from the seat. He is making me want to cry more “What happened Jen? Robyn” making my way to the toilet, I am not really wanting to speak to Chris.

Chris is stubborn, he won’t leave me until he knows I am ok and he will keep asking and asking and he will wait outside this door until I come out. Taking in a deep breath opening the door “seriously?” Chris stared at me unimpressed with how long I took “what is it? I am ok, Jen and I was just speaking on things. I cried happy tears, you know how it is when I speak on my dad” Chris is searching my eyes, he is wanting to know the truth “yeah but you been like that at the hospital, also what was you speaking about to TJ? You been really odd since then actually” clearing my throat “we just spoke on things, that is all. Look I am just having a talk with Jen ok? It’s fine” he is not believing me, but he will have too “ok” he touched my shoulder and then placing his hand on my cheek “I got you” he breathed out, he is annoyed like he lowkey doesn’t believe me either “I will sit down then, I got an eye on you though Robyn” Chris turned walking off “on god” he said, Jen smiled at me awkwardly, I didn’t think Chris was watching me like that actually. Making my way back to the seat “Chris kept asking what I said, what happened. Why is she crying, what did I say. Anyways back to the part where I murder him” I breathed out laughing “not that now, I just think I don’t want Chris to lose another friend in this. I feel like Chris is saying something to him for him to be saying this, Chris must be speaking on this a lot, you know?” Jen nodded her head “they all talk, these men do. But he has no right to repeat it, he has no right to speak on your fertility. Same with Chris, it’s tiring for you Robyn. You are working so hard, I have two boys and dealing with this. You have three girls and dealing with being the face of the company, my ass can skype a meeting, you are literally the face of it, here and there. You both still have time, things will calm down, but he has no right. I want to hit him” Jen will do that for me, I love her.

I have caught Chris twice look over at me to check if I am ok, I adore him a lot “am I weak Jen? Be truthful with me?” looking over at her “erm, pre mommy Robyn I think you would be ripping his ass, but I think you are more thinking of the bigger picture, you see that this weasel is close friends with Chris. School years too, you’re stuck between telling Chris or just keeping it to yourself, but I would mention to Chris that you want that boy to not be paid for, he has nothing to do with you. That has to stop, that is your empire, your money. That ends, he may dislike it but then you take it from there. You will see his true colours, meaning TJ. If he kicks off then it will be about the money” nodding my head “he keeps throwing that Chris pushes to have it, but as a man he can say no too” I added “exactly but always remember this, you have the power to destroy that friendship and I think he hates it. He is envious of that; I think he is. I understand what you are doing but don’t ever let that weasel think he has one over you, because he doesn’t. You will pounce when it’s good and ready, but I would reign it in. Say to him that stops, then we will see TJ’ true intentions, let’s see. If he doesn’t kick off and he does it then maybe he was right in a way but do that” nodding my head, he is a bastard and I will expose him, or shall I say he will expose himself.

[itsana004]

10 Characters for 10 people

Thank you for the tag @aoristiandariostis !! It's going to be difficult to choose only 10 favourite characters, but challenge accepted! I send the same challenge to @mizaelloverno107, @sienasiesta, @galaxymaster360, @ayse7124, @vector3996, @karenusia, @baddyzarc, @little-mx-cryptic, @aerialartistic, @animalgirl2018 and anyone who comes across this and wants to do it!

1) Liesel Meminger from The Book Thief

This is one of my absolute favourite books and movie. I remember watching this at school when I was in fifth grade and loving it and love her character. This story sets at the time of the Nazi Germany and the character of Liesel in front our eyes has been through very rough times in her early childhood, she has experienced and seen premature death from a very tender age and since the novel takes place during World War II, death is omnipresent and she constantly puts her own life on the line with her actions. She has a very unique prospective of life and was really fascinated by the power of the words, in fact she is referred as a "book thief", she has pretty much put her life on the line just to learn how to read and understand the meaning of the words, with which she has saved a life and saved her own.

2) Dolowa/Droite/Dextra from Yu-Gi-Oh! Zexal and II

This character lays a special place in my heart. Droite is presented as a classy business woman type but rather here she seems to be a person with a duty of the Maintenance of Security in the tower belonging to its creator and the Mayor, as his right hand woman, it is also confirmed that she's an elite. The reason I began to like her it's because how her true layers of personality quickly contrasted the typical business woman/seductive persona, she was nothing like it even though most of the time, the characters similar to her character design are portrayed that way. She's purely devoted to her loved ones and she doesn't got tip to toe with her boss' wishes and would face any consequnces for them. She's caring and capable and her Dueling tactics were really cool.

3) Mebara Keiichi from Higurashi no naku koro ni (kai, rei, kira)

I love love love him. Keichii is hilarious, funny, easily can get attached to but he's a tragic hero. He breaks the chains of tragic fate in utterly hopeless situations and I love how much he cares about his friends. It's absolutely tragic the deaths they have to go through, and luckly they came past it and Keichii played a great role in breaking those tragic chains.

4) Ellen/Viola from The Witch House

The Witch's House is an JRPG game and I am so sad that this doesn't have an anime or something because the plot is really awsome. Anyway, the character of Ellen, she's the main villain, so I should feel no sorrow and sympathy for this b- bery very bad person, and especially not include her in the favourite list, but my kokoro can't be helped, even though I absolutely hate her character out of frustration, but she has a tragic ass backstory to make feel damn emotional for. I hate her but I also love her, idk anymore... Next!

5) Sana from Kodomo no Omocha or Rossana

She's super energetic, and kind and compassionate and querky, silly, stupid sometimes but also very intelligent and mature. We saw so many phases of herself and her character grow. Even though she goes through really tough times, or even dying almsot, she always has a huge heart of her to forgive and come out of trauma and look at life very brightly. She was definately my role model and I am still surprised when I rewatch the way she handled her problems, and she had tones in the anime since she's an actress and lots of teenage drama. Her approach to problems was somehow many times applicable to my life and I still feel inspired by her. She's really an awsome character.

6) Katniss Everdeen from The Hunger Games

I immediately fell in love with her character the moment she volunteered for her sister. She's incredibly selfless, devoted, brave and ribellious, however it's a shame the reason that everything started by trying to protect that person is taken away from her. I loved how she realised that President Coin is just another President Snow and she killed the right person and rightfully allowed the citizens of the Districts to kill Snow. There were so many parts of the book and scenes of the movie that really drawn such a high opinion of her but I can't talk about everything other than the beginning and the end, otherwise I would take ages

7) Phoenix Wright from Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney (Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney, Dual Destiny, everything that has Phoenix and my babies Apollo and Atena in it!!)

I admire how he believes the innocence of the people and is after the truth and not winning the case, he's true, genuine and honest. I love how he does the extreme to repay people back, literally make them either his assistant, adopted daughter, his apprentice, his husband (yes I am talking about Edgy), I can't even take account of at this point.

8) Shuici Saihara from Danganronpa

I have a thing for Detectives with the name that starts with a "S", the only reason I didn't put Shinici Kudo from Detective Conan because I couldn't keep up with the series and honestly I can't, maybe one day when my online classes will end, anyway... Shuici, I like his detective work, his reasoning and the bond she formed with Kaede and his sidekick Kaito, it makes me cry just remembering it, and he's actually sensitive. I loved him even more after his reactions in Love Hotel and secret scenes. The character of Kaede was a huge influence on him, he didn't want to find the truth before because he was scared, but then he took off his cap and solved cases with his head up in the sky (I still can't get over the feels from the fact Kaede's portrait is always on Shuici's side in scrum debate to show she's always with him even after death 😭)

9) Alvin Junior from The Walking Dead

Even though I followed the series of Walking Dead for a very long time, I really got attached to Alvin Junior as much as Clementine, he's just a young god and can't convince me otherwise. Some fans didn't like AJ that much because he was new but I really saw AJ like a young Clem and Clementine now being in Lee's shoes and protecting AJ with her life just as Lee did with hers. AJ is such a mood sometimes and also really reliable. He had to make really hard calls poor guy, but I am really glad to having a happy ending

10) Agatha from the Dark Deception

Agatha is a merciless monster and a spoiled brat that will say that you're cheating by speed boost while she teleport and cut you into a corner while we're running, but I still love her <3

[atopearth]

Final Fantasy VII Remake Part 4 - The Intervention of Fate (Ch 15-18) + Overall Review

Seeing the destruction of Sector 7 alongside the sunset was really beautifully saddening. It’s devastating for Tifa and Barret to have to look over it all knowing that their actions caused this. Even if Shinra framed them for it, even if Shinra were the bad guys who killed all these people and everyone’s homes, there’s no doubt that what Tifa and Barret did ended up pushing them into doing this, and it’s hard to have to carry such a burden. On another note, I never thought I would complain about this because I loved the shipping fanservice in the beginning, but can we please calm down with the amount of times Cloud has to hold and save Tifa in some way?! Yes, I like Tifa too, but I’m not sure if there was a battle or scene where Cloud did not save Tifa/Aerith or hold their hand or something. Like yes it’s nice to see, but it’s honestly too much, I’m dying. I feel like a lot of the time it’s pushing the romance more than anything and it kills me because the original prioritised telling the story. And honestly, if you think about it, it’s kinda weird, they make it seem like Tifa and Cloud are really close friends who haven’t seen each other in a long time, but in reality they’re practically strangers in a sense because when they were children, Tifa never really thought much of him, the only time something about Cloud resonated with her was when he told her he was leaving to go become a SOLDIER and probably when he came to her rescue (fulfilling their promise) when Sephiroth slashed her. And it was only after she received letters from Cloud after he joined Shinra that she began to notice him more, so honestly, if we’re to be picky, this was supposed to be a more awkward period between Cloud and Tifa because Tifa liked and cared about him, but she didn’t know how to show it properly since Cloud always liked her but she never really cared. Whereas for Cloud, his memories are jumbled, so he’s awkward with her for a different reason lol. Anyway, I think I would have just liked more tension between their relationship? Because right now, it just feels like everyone loves Cloud because he’s cold but soft on the inside, so he’s a great cinnamon roll or whatever, but it really doesn’t show the depth to their characters and their relationships. I’m starting to think this remake is really just fanservice for old FFVII fans rather than a proper retelling. I mean, I’ll still like it, but it’s just a bit sad.

Well, Shinra Company is fancy. Tifa jumping on the lights to get the Shinra keycard was interesting but honestly tedious, I think I’ve had enough of these tbh lol. Anyway, I was going to run up the stairs in this remake, but then I realised the camera was making me feel sick so I just went back to what I did in the original; bust in the front door and go on the elevator lol. Although I have to say, I honestly enjoyed the original more where it had more of the feel where we’re busting in from the front door haha. That memorial museum was pretty, but honestly boring lol. Like, whyyyy is there so much maintenance going on?! I seriously thought they did a full on museum tour and I was like, that’s pretty cool, but no, I learnt basically nothing, sigh. Maybe that VR movie was cool to see, especially since it kinda explains that Ancients were the ones who discovered Mako energy and helped create materia, and I guess the graphics were pretty. But I think it felt like such a spoiler to show Sephiroth walking in the Shinra building, it just doesn’t really build any tension. I really only wanted to see the blood trail lol. Anyway, Hart is someone I don’t remember at all so I assume he’s a new character? Or is he that guy who you had to decipher those codes to or something? Haha. But anyway, I guess if he’s been changing the security camera feeds then does that mean Cloud and them won’t get locked up in a cell? Okay, the Shinra building was so… uneventful and boring lol. Like, I wasn’t exactly looking for a replica but I honestly thought it would be more…fun? It was legit so boring and so not memorable compared to the original. No code deciphering, no plate moving, no special treasure chests, no running past guards secretly, nothing! Literally just that Shinra training facility and other useless things like the museum and archives that don’t even have books to read! I think the most enjoyable thing was going around trashing the chairs everywhere because I didn’t even mean to move them, but Cloud running around just naturally destroys them lol. Yes, totally infiltrating “quietly”. But seriously, Shinra building is definitely a letdown right now. Scarlet’s ruthlessness was just...whatever too lol.

Sigh, I kinda really wanted to see the gym and the napping room lolll. I guess it was nice that we got to see them go through the air duct in the bathroom to spy on the President’s meeting, but stilllll. I mean, they didn’t even let me explore the women’s bathroom! C'mon! I don’t need this kind of realism in my game! I want to explore!! Maybe I’m just getting ahead of myself and it’ll be better.. Anyway, Hojo looks as creepy as the person that he is lmaoo, and being Reeve is suffering, considering he’s the only one that seems to care about the people. The idea of Hojo having all these monsters in his research lab is disturbing lol.  I found the explanation and existence of the Whisperers…unnecessary, they’re basically things that are there to stop the party from changing the predetermined fate of this world. Like, I kinda knew already with considering where they always appeared etc but ugh. Oh well, whatever. Red XIII is pretty hot. He looks older than I thought though, he looks more like what I would expect his father to look like tbh lol, I mean Bugenhagen always said Red XIII was practically a kid in terms of his species lifespan!! 

I’m sad that the Turks Theme doesn’t have that clicky sound to it that made it sound cool anymore, sigh. I’m also kindaaa disappointed that they seem to be pushing with the Turks the idea that they’re quite..nice? Like, maybe it’s just me, but despite how “cool and nice” the Turks were in the original, what I loved about them the most was their work ethic and how it’s a lot of dirty work, but it’s their job and they have a sense of pride to it.  Whereas sometimes in this remake, I kinda feel like, they question their job too much when they know what it entails? Like, I really wanted to see Rude catch us in the elevator LOL. Anyway, Sephiroth appearing near Jenova and slashing the bridge they were standing on in retaliation of Cloud attacking him was interesting…not too sure what to think about it right now because it felt rather random tbh lol. I guess we are definitely not getting the jail cell time, which is more disappointing than the boring Shinra building tbh. Not only did the cell time really give you time to bond with everyone in their cells, it also really highlighted how sudden and scary it was to see a trail of blood, and all these Shinra company men’s bodies as you slowly climb the stairs to realise what happened.

Btw, lmao at Red XIII pushing down handles, it looks so awkward because it seemed like he was struggling so bad hahahah. The Drum was an annoying place, I hated changing materia around between the two parties. Like whyyy can’t I just change the whole line of weapon and armour materia (like in the original) instead of slowly doing it one by one?! Aside from that, this was a boring place too lol. I guess the only nice thing was seeing Tifa and Aerith get along so well lol. Anyway, Jenova’s blood trail was much more pretty and fascinating than ominous tbh lol, it really gives a completely different feel to the actual blood trail in the original. It’s cool in its own regards though I guess. Okayyy, wow, I’m starting to think that this is becoming pretty ridiculous. Like it was obvious Barret won’t die because you know, these Whispers know that it’s not his fate to die here, so of course they’ll somehow save him, but now it’s just silly? Like, sure it’s not his fate to die here but was Barret such a crucial person to the “fate” that can’t be changed? Anyway, so basically everything that happened in the original is probably the “fate” that must be followed, but at the same time they’re just changing up things to make it as convenient as they want to for the story. Honestly, that segment with Barret and President Shinra was so cliche, I wanted to bang my head watching it because it was so unnecessary. I think he should have just died like in the original. Like all the mental agony of saving him or not, and then President Shinra showing how much of a crap he is was just so ugh, like was that really important? What did we expect him to be like? Did we really need to see this? Even seeing the sword pierce them was so whatever at that point because I’m starting to think the story is realllyyyyyy getting “basic”. Also, showing Wedge being here but not being able to change or do anything because “he’s not a part of fate” was just ridiculous. Like seriously, we get it, don’t these Whispers have anything better to do? I mean, I really wouldn’t say that the original timeline is the best timeline to follow for this world but okay, whatever they want.

Anyway, I’m sad that Rufus doesn’t have orange hair!! Hahaha, but that’s fine, since he still looks pretty hot. I love how he still has his dog!! Rufus was so annoying though, like seriously, I’ve had enough of bosses that just counterattack you, and you have to find the exact moment for an opening to deal damage zzzz. Otherwise, it was really cool to fight Rufus, this was starting to become the only thing I was looking forward to lol. Kinda sad you don’t actually fight Arsenal(?) that robot in the elevator anymore though. The fight took so long because I didn’t realise what I was supposed to be doing lolll. Cloud is taking lessons from Roche in getting crazy with the motorbike haha, seriously though, the motorbike and the blue car is so nostalgic. I did enjoy how alike the original, if you bothered looking (well it was more obvious in the remake) you actually see the motorbike and the car in the building haha. Not sure about Cloud throwing his sword scaring off the Shinra soldiers though, like dude, your sword could have fallen out of the building! Anyway, I knew it was coming, but I honestly hoped it didn’t, and that is…the second round of the motorbike game!!! Yes, the thing I sucked at the most in the original and in this remake as well, and what do you know, they just upped the difficulty with a boss! Not gonna lie, I legit died a few times because I had no idea how I was supposed to kill him, and when I realised how to do it, my skills were lacking, so yes, it took me a while. I was pretty frustrated lol, I mean, snowboarding is my worst enemy too but I never had to do it more than once! This game is just bullying people like me who suck at this mini game, sigh T_T It is pretty cool though. HOWEVER, it would have made life much easier if Red XIII threw a potion at me whenever I was dying and not just in between the battles, sighhh~

Anyway, this whole going into another dimension that Aerith says will change the course of events where we’ll now forge our own destiny or whatever by killing the Whispers who are trying to convene fate to be as it should flow like in the original story is…weird to say the least of it. Sephiroth wasn’t too difficult to beat, but I found the whole fight in this place weird and cliche, with all the “memories” of the original timeline coming to Cloud and them, and for them to destroy all that to change their fate. Okay, Zack is alive? Like, I was kinda thinking it would be interesting and funny if Zack were to survive but hmmm, not sure what to think of it. Well, the different dog probably indicates it’s a different timeline/world but that doesn’t really stop the writers from creating a story where he can jump to their world or whatever. Biggs is alive? Is everyone alive lol? Like, I guess Cloud and everyone are planning to alter fate so ensuring everyone survives is what they want, but at the same time, I’m just baffled at this ending. I honestly don’t know how to feel about it. It really doesn’t help that the dialogue is so… bland? Useless? It’s so flowery with no substance imo. Maybe in the next part we’ll get to see Zack’s new world line from his perspective and then their worlds can connect or something lol. Anyway! I’ll say, I don’t like or dislike the ending because honestly, with all the changes that happened with the Shinra company, I already lowered my expectations to the max lol, it also helped the ending was kinda spoiled to me before I even played the game, so I knew it wouldn’t be a faithful remake, but is instead more of a FFVII-2 kinda deal. But I still find the way things played out really disjointed and cliche. The whole chapter 18 suffered the most in dialogue and story tbh, because honestly, I’m not sure if people who haven’t played the original would really get it, and would they really get the importance of Zack lol. It’s just annoying that they decided to throw all this at the end when everything else was Shinra and Shinra. And yeah, I see why they made the Aerith and Cloud “romance” so subtle you couldn’t feel anything about it, it’s probably because they want to make it more of a Aerith and Zack thing for this remake, which is understandable, but kinda saddening because that changes a lot of things in terms of how you’ll feel about it all.

Overall Review Overall, let me attempt to put together how I feel about the whole thing. Honestly, I’ve been thinking about how to write down my feelings for days or weeks but I still don’t know what to say of this disappointment LOL. Tbh, I think the thing I would have appreciated the most would be Square Enix telling me that this wouldn’t be a faithful adaptation of the original with HD graphics and extended story/scenes. Because if I didn’t have that expectation, I wouldn’t have felt as mixed about the ending as I am now. People seem to hate on people for being disappointed at expecting that it would be a faithful adaptation, but really, what did you want a lot of the old fans to expect? The game itself is riding on a nostalgia train yet it’s our fault for thinking it would be faithful? Even the Japanese commercial rode on the nostalgia train with a guy happily talking about the iconic scenes in the original and being excited that he’ll be able to experience the remake with people who don’t know it. They clearly wanted old fans to join the hype and then sucker punched them to the gut with the ending. Thankfully, I knew what was coming so I survived but honestly, aside from hopefully still getting to see other iconic scenes, I’m not really interested in how the story will play out. I hate stories involving stuff like time travel and branching timelines etc most of the time, especially when time travel is not the main focus of the story. This isn’t something like Chrono Trigger. I think my biggest problem though was that considering how much of a slow burn 80% of the game was, the fact that once we got to the Shinra building, everything just lacked detail and felt so rushed into that...ending. My biggest problem isn’t the ending itself, but how everything led to that ending, because it was really dissatisfying to watch. Like, honestly, on paper, it’s not a bad idea, it would be interesting to see how things could play out with the unknown etc, but really, the way they did it with the obnoxious Whispers throughout the story, alongside the out of nowhere ending really killed the experience.

I’m probably being whiny at this point but really, the main gripe I have with the ending is that it makes me think that the writers thought it would be “boring” to just redo the original with extended stories because “everyone knows the story already” kinda thing, and it also kinda implies as if the original was “perfect as it is”, which I honestly have to disagree with. I love the original FFVII but honestly, a lot of things could have been told better without feeling as disjointed as some things were, like it was nice to uncover bits and pieces etc, but a lot of things also relied on you yourself to find it, so it’s easy to miss things. For example, without a walkthrough, I honestly didn’t realise there was that scene in the Shinra mansion where you could actually see Zack die. I also feel like integrating Yuffie and Vincent in the story more would have been something good to focus on in the original because Wutai is important, the Lucrecia, Hojo and Vincent story is important, but because they were optional, it wasn’t always something people found. I just feel like for the story FFVII is, it was really unnecessary to make it more convoluted than it is, because now it’s just detracting from what made this game good. Like, maybe it might be interesting with this time travel stuff, but at the same time, this isn’t really FFVII anymore, all it has is iconic scenes in HD as fanservice. Which kinda makes me mad, because they so blatantly shove in your face FFVII fanservice for like 90% of the game and then they just show this ending, like okay. I’m not even sure the Weapons are that important anymore because who needs them to come out to protect the planet if the Whispers (like really, are they even dead?) are around? It’s just the stakes for everything have become so high where it’s involving fate and time travel etc. what is the point of the stuff that are limited to being inside this planet that is being controlled by the Whispers of fate? Well, whatever, I could complain all day here and I would still feel dissatisfied.

Anyway, nevertheless, I still enjoyed most of the game. I had my gripes here and there with the changes, but most of it was done really well, and I still liked it a lot. I mean, Wall Market is so beautiful and went beyond my expectations! The detail they put into the graphics and stuff really blew me away and I couldn’t stop taking screenshots. I also liked how they made Avalanche a bit more personal to Cloud. Although I really enjoyed seeing Aerith, Tifa and Cloud fanservice though, sometimes I felt like the scenes were just that, like just fanservice and it kinda got tedious. The side quests throughout the game were also quite boring imo. Like, I don’t expect anything groundbreaking from them, but they were really boring story wise and gameplay wise. The “puzzles” such as climbing across on those hand bars were so tedious and slow, I was annoyed lol, it’s so clunky to do! I’ll take the stupid crane any day. And the battle AI kills me. I know you’re supposed to swap between characters to build up ATB but man would I appreciate if the ATB charged up faster or if the AI wasn’t so useless. Barret not doing his job shooting sentry turrets and Tifa guarding against enemies not attacking her from ten miles away made me want to strangle someone. Like, it’s not terrible, but it definitely wasn’t enjoyable enough for me to care about playing hard mode. Lol, I’m back to complaining, but honestly, if I played the remake without knowing the original, aside from the graphics, I’m not sure if I was really into the story at all. Not saying it’s bad, but Midgar was always kinda like the beginning of the beginning so it’s really not that interesting in itself, and the bland story telling didn’t help imo, I guess the good thing was that it solidified everyone’s relationships? Anyway, I’ll still play the other parts because it’s FFVII but I think if it becomes something like Lightning Returns etc, I really just might drop it. For now, I’ll just go along with the ride, right now, things are just a 7/10~

P.S I think what I’m most sad about right now is that I won’t have the same feelings I had when I bought the remake. Since I live in Australia, the copies were sold before April 10th, so really, I cancelled my pre-order and went to the store and bought it myself after work. I was really excited to have it and get to play it because even though a lot of the things weren’t the same, it felt really nice to relive that experience of joining Cloud and them on their journey again. I really liked it and thought the reinterpretation to fit the more serious mood and everything was nice, but I’m honestly disappointed that I won’t be as excited to continue the journey in the next part. It’s the first time in a long time since I felt so excited for a game to come out, so it’s saddening, but I guess this is what it is.

[eldritchsurveys]

654.

Honestly, what are you thinking about right now? >> I’m aggravated because ESO’s server maintenance is supposed to be over by now, but it isn’t, and I want to play. I also hate that I am so easily aggravated by things like this sometimes, because I’m sure to people with fully functional brains it’s not a big deal and it probably shouldn’t be to me either -- but no one ever said I had a fully functional brain. Also, I’m thinking about all the raucous crowing going on outside. The crows have really been out in full force lately. Do you like to get your nails done? >> No, it involves too much physical contact (although, at least it’s only on one part of my body). Also, I can do just fine at home by myself, and save like... fucking $60 or whatever. Why the fuck is it so expensive anyway? What are your thoughts on Valentine’s Day? >> I don’t have any thoughts on Valentine’s Day. It really doesn’t affect me most of the time (it didn’t even affect me when I was single, honestly). I think it’s a bit of a silly holiday but far be it for me to rain on other people’s parades about it -- the last thing anyone needs is someone like me being pedantic and bah-humbug-y about the fact that they’re doing something cute for someone they love. Anyway, while V-Day doesn’t really factor into my life any (Sparrow sometimes gets wine and makes dinner and we just veg out watching YouTube or whatever), I was flipping through a local publication while we were at Biggby the other day and I found a V-Day event at one of our favourite places (Long Road Distillery), which was perfect. So we’re going to that, and I think it will be fun. Sometimes V-Day is just a convenient time to find fun "date” ideas. Do you remember the last movie you saw while on a date? >> Well, in the last question I put “date” in quotes because I, an aromantic, don’t really know how I feel about the concept, but at the same time it’s not completely illogical to call planned outings with my spouse a “date”, so... you know. Regardless, the last time we both went to see a movie together is when we went to see Jojo Rabbit last year. Do you love the color pink? >> I mean, it’s fine. I like it in some cases and I like it less in others.

Have you ever cheated on someone? >> Yes. What color is your favorite bra? >> My binder is black. Sometimes I do consider getting one with a cool print on it, though. I forget the name of the company that makes those. If you took on the surname of the last person you kissed, what would it be? >> Can Calah doesn’t have a surname. Do you kiss on the first date? >> --- Do you like to wear dresses? >> Sure, sometimes. What I don’t like is wearing them in public and knowing that I now have no way to assert that I am not a cis woman. Because “well, you’re wearing a dress, after all!” Yeah, because it’s comfortable and has a cool pattern on it. Fuck off. Are you into sports? >> No. Do you like any ‘manly’ activities like hunting, fishing, or camping? >> I’ve never been hunting or fishing, but I imagine I’d find hunting a bit more interesting than fishing (although, from what I understand, both activities involve a lot of waiting around without moving, which doesn’t sound fun at all). Camping, however, can be a lot of fun. Did you lose your virginity before you were sixteen? >> I was coerced into sexual activity before I was sixteen. If not, are you still a virgin? >> ---

What was the name of your first boyfriend? >> Craig. Your first kiss? >> Hm.

Are you still with either of those people from the last 2 questions? >> Like, of fucking course not. Have you ever used your bra to hold things like you would a pocket? >> Yeah. Are you a shop-a-holic? >> No. How many purses do you own? >> Zero. Describe your favorite pair of shoes: >> --- Who knows a secret about you that no one else does? >> --- What is your longest relationship to date? >> The one I’m in. Who ended the last relationship you were in? >> I did. Have you ever gotten back with an ex? >> Yeah. Everyone makes mistakes. Are you bi? >> I assume I would be if I wasn’t ace. Have you ever done something with a friend of the same sex? >> Yeah. Who was your first prom date? >> A 29-year-old police officer from a nearby town. My father set it up. Yes, it was just as sad as it sounds. Have you ever dated someone more than three years older than you? >> Way more. Have you ever dated someone a year younger than you? >> Yeah. Have you ever fallen for a guy friend? >> No. Have you ever had a guy friend you weren’t into, fall for you? >> I don’t think so. Do you cry during romantic movies? >> Not usually. I don’t have the kind of heartstrings that romance flicks are primed to tug upon.

Who was the last person to see you cry? >> The only people that see me cry are Inworlders if I can help it.

Have you ever been used? >> I don’t think so.

Have you ever felt violated? >> Yeah. Do you like when I guy takes you by surprise and kisses you? >> I wouldn’t like it if anyone did that. What do you think of red lipstick? >> I don’t think anything of it, really. It’s just lipstick. Do you ever leave the house without make up? >> I usually leave the house without makeup on.

Do you tan? >> I’m already dark-skinned, boo. What is your natural hair color? >> Dark brown. Is it that right now? >> Yes, with a tiny crop of greys. Have you ever gone for someone despite knowing they were bad for you? >> Well, I kind of just overlooked my instincts, is what I did. Do you prefer guys with dark hair or light hair? >> --- Have you kissed anyone who’s name started with 'C’? ’D’? 'J’? 'K’? 'R’? ’T’? >> I don’t feel like digging back into a history I don’t care about to figure this out. Would you be more likely to date a redneck or a goth? >> A goth, if I were to date. A prep or a skater? >> Unlike “goth” and “redneck”, I don’t know anyone my age who identifies as “prep” or “skater”, so.... An athlete or a musician? >> Musician, probably. I don’t think I’d be able to remain interested in (or interesting to) anyone for whom atheticism was important. When was the last time someone gave you flowers? >> I don’t know. What kind of gift can win you over? >> Win me over to what? Has anyone ever sung to you? >> Yeah. What was the stupidest thing you’ve done while drunk? >> Drank too much and ended up sick for the rest of the night. Are diamonds really a girls best friend? >> I don’t know, ask a girl. Gold or silver? >> Gold. What is your favorite scent? >> I don’t have one. Do you like massages? >> I really don’t. Apparently “no one hates massages” except lmao I do. Have you ever been skinny dipping? >> No. Do you sleep naked? >> No. Is smoking a turn-off? >> Not necessarily. But the thing about smoking is, if you do it enough, it has lingering effects that are turn-offs -- smelling like smoke all the time, yellowed fingertips, a persistent cough, that sort of thing. If you smoke every once in a while, that probably won’t be a problem, so it’s fine. But I’m guessing not many people can say they smoke every once in a while (I’m the only person I’ve known that does).

What is the perfect date? >> --- Is there a certain tv show you get upset if you miss? >> Not really. I can always just... catch up... What is your favorite movie? >> The Fountain. When was the last time you spent the night at someone else’s house? >> Christmas. Was that someone of the same or opposite sex? >> It was Sparrow’s parents... What is one food you always crave? >> I don’t know about always. Baklava, maybe? I have it so rarely that I do end up wanting it often. Are you an exercise freak? >> I am... freaked out by exercise. Ha. What scares you more, spiders or snakes? >> Neither. Do you expect to be married in the next two years? >> I am already married. What would you do if you found out you were pregnant? >> I wouldn’t be pregnant. It’s scientifically impossible for several reasons. Was the last person to call you male or female? >> --- Does it matter if a guy has a sense of humor? >> I mean, I’m not going to hang out with someone completely humourless. Do you wish on shooting stars? >> No. What are your thoughts on guys who wear wifebeaters? >> Literally, that’s just an undershirt. What kind of specific opinion can I possibly have about people who wear undershirts... Who do you vent to when something is bothering you? >> Can Calah.

What is the best way to cool off when you’re mad? >> Distraction. Plenty of distraction. Do you have someone who is protective of you (father, brother, etc.)? >> No. Well, King Crimson would be, but there’s not much he needs to protect me from Inworld, lmao. Would you ever get implants? >> No. Have you ever had a crush on a sibling’s friend? >> No. Have you ever had a crush on a friend’s sibling? >> No. What is the corniest pick-up line someone’s ever used on you? >> I don’t remember. It would have had to be like 10 years ago. Does it mean more to you if a guy uses the word 'beautiful’ about you? >> --- Is your best friend a guy? >> --- Are you more of a 'girly girl’ or a 'tomboy’? >> I’m not either, since I’m not a girl. Is your hair longer than your shoulders? >> It’s not even longer than an inch. Do you prefer showers or baths? >> Showers. Have you ever dated someone with a child? >> Yeah. She was a funny kid, I liked her. One time she dead ass sat in front of the main menu screen of a movie that her father had put on for her and then forgot about, for like an hour, and he was like “omg why didn’t you come get me to press play???” and she was just like *lolshrug*. Kids. Have you ever dated someone shorter than you? >> No. Have you ever dated someone of another race? >> Yes. Do you secretly still love to dress up for Halloween? >> I have never dressed up for Halloween (aside from just wearing a nice outfit, but not like a costume) and I would love to have that experience. Have you kissed anyone today? >> No. Will you kiss anyone tomorrow? >> It’s possible. Are you addicted to texting? >> No. If you and your best friend got arrested, what would it be for? >> ---

[vampiresmiled]

✩ caviar

they have had one interaction thus far and like … no hcs, so – i am completely winging it here. if i’m wrong, it’s canon now.

DISAGREEMENTS

who is more likely to raise their voice? steven. kev has only raised her voice twice in her life. both those times in relation to somebody she loved dying, so . . . unless somebody’s boutta kick the bucket, it’s steven. who threatens to leave but never actually does? kevin. she’s very loyal, kay. she likes sticking shit out. who actually keeps their word and leaves? i guess steven. who trashes the house? only one of these persons have anger issues, take a wild guess. do either of them get physical? i hope not. kev might’ve forgiven abuse in the past, odette is quaking, but she’s not a punching-bag, steven ! touch her and i’ll whoop your ass through the screen. how often do they argue/disagree? not often, honestly. what is there to argue about. their one convo is going great thus far. who is the first to apologise? kevin. she just leaps at the opportunity to apologize. she apologizes when she hasn’t even done anything wrong. the girl is malfunctioning, let me tell you. 

SEX

who is on top? listen, kev might’ve had sex with two people . . . but that doesn’t necessarily means she knows what she’s doing. so steven. who is on the bottom? kev, the perpetual bottom.  who has the strangest desires? i dunno, steven ? kev is too vanilla for this shit. any kinks? lord if i knew.who’s dominant in bed? steven, i’m guessing. is head ever in the equation? the fact that this is a question is honestly sad. i hope there is ! i can’t think about kevin sucking dick, though, so please don’t. if so, who is better at performing it? steven. definitely.ever had sex in public? no, that’s illegal.who moans the most? k to the e to the v.who leaves the most marks? probably steven.who screams the loudest? literally is that not the same as the question above. moaning and screaming what’s the heckin difference. who is the more experienced of the two? you don’t gotta ask me that ‘cause you know.do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’? they’re both soft so take a gamble.rough or soft? see above.how long do they usually last? i wanna say whatever the national average. xoxois protection used? i hope so, i really do. kev’s smart enough for it. is steven? does it ever get boring? let’s be honest, she’s boring so probably.where is the strangest place they’d have sex? kev’s dreams.

FAMILY

do your muses plan on having children/or have children? i feel like steven wants kids but kevin definitely does not. she is a kid, why on earth would she want the responsibility of that when she can’t even take care of herself. if so, how many children do your muses want/have? steven probaby wants, like, 3 to replicate his own damn family. kev wants minus seventeen. who is the favorite parent? if we pretend that they will, in fact, end up with a little gremlin – steven. who is the authoritative parent? also steven. kev can’t even tell off a fly, let alone a snotty little brat. who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school? steven, too. kev loves school, how dare her kids not.who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around? kevin. she eats like a crap herself, and since steven works out . . . i’m guessing he does not. who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children? also steven. kevin doesn’t understand sports. so unless it’s like a loud reading of mary shelly’s classics, then she’s not interested.who goes to parent teacher interviews? both. kevin is very non-threatening and sweet so teachers like her, steven asks the real questions and you know, is engaged and what not. best of both worlds. who changes the diapers? not kevin, that’s for sure. who gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby? kevin doesn’t sleep well as it is, so are you really gonna make her do that ? jk, she’s already up so she will.who spends the most time with the children? steven, without question.who packs their lunch boxes? steven, yet again. who gives their children ‘the talk’? oof, definitely not kevin. she never got the talk herself so she wouldn’t even know where to begin.who cleans up after the kids? both. kevin isn’t really a neat-freak but when shit’s sticky . . . that’s gross. who worries the most? kevin. kevin worries about literally everything and now she’s gonna have to worry about this little poop goblin ? she’s gonna have a heart attack. who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from? how is this a question when kev has cussed like thrice in her life. she’s more likely to learn swears from her kids.

AFFECTION

who likes to cuddle? kev’s not big on physical contact like in general, so . . . i mean, she does but if it’s a question who likes it most it’s probably steven. who is the little spoon? kev. she’s wittle and she’s fragile and she needs all the protection in the whole wide world. who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places? my bet’s on steven. get it together, man. who struggles to keep their hands to themself? still steven. but you know, i get it. danielle rose russell is baby. how long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable? they need frequent breaks. who gives the most kisses? the answer might surprise you, but – kev ! she likes smooching. who doesn’t. what is their favourite non-sexual activity? based on their current thread ? they enjoy helping drunks get into their ubers. where is their favourite place to cuddle? whoever’s bed kev is currently in. who is more likely to playfully grope the other? steven doesn’t seem the type but she’s less of the type to so i’m gonna go ahead and give it to stephen. how often do they get time to themselves? she’s got school and work and he’s got work and his underground fight club, their schedules clash it’s really sad. 

SLEEPING

who snores? steven seems like a snorer. that’s why sienna doesn’t wanna live with him, actually. new head canon ! from me 2 you. if both do, who snores the loudest? i mean, if only one person snores – do the math.do they share a bed or sleep separately? they don’t live together, so . . . separately. if they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart? they start off together, end up not together. who talks in their sleep? kev, probably.what do they wear to bed? kev has straight up pj’s and steven seems like a t-shirt and boxers type of lad. are either of your muses insomniacs? kevin is fo cheezy. them night terrors really make it difficult to catch a snooze, you know. can sleeping pills be found by the bedside? hey, fun idea, have ronald prescribe this bitch some sleeping pills. steven step up your fucking game. that’s how you flirt, that’s how you woo a lady.do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side? side by side type bitches.who wakes up with bed hair? steven, probably. kev’s the type to sleep with a ponytail to avoid this exact outcome.who wakes up first? kevin ‘cos she can’t fucking sleep. PERIOD !who prepares breakfast in bed for the other? i hope steven ‘cos kev can’t cook for shit.what is their favourite sleeping position? spooning, perhapth. who hogs the sheets? steven that troll.do they set an alarm each night? yes, they do. even when they don’t have to because kev’s bound to be awake at the crack of dawn anyhow. can a television be found in their bedroom? nope.who has nightmares? if you’ve been paying attention you would know this.who has ridiculous dreams? steven. he has fun, wacky dreams and kev has a pure trauma fest in hers. who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed? steven, i was gonna say he’s a big boy but he really isn’t.who makes the bed? hopefully both ‘cos they got separate ones.what time is bed time? fuck if i know.any routines/rituals before bed? i bet steven’s a shower before bed lad and kev’s a shower in the morning gal . . . can i make it any more obvious. who’s the grumpiest when they wake up? steven, i bet.

WORK

who is the busiest? probably kevin ‘cos it’s like : her job, school, homework, friends, hamster maintenance . . . who rakes in the highest income? steven for sure.are any of your muses unemployed? nope. kev should be but by some miracle performed by god, she is not.who takes the most sick days? steven. kev can’t afford to have her boss dislike her. joseph please be kind to her. who is more likely to turn up late to work? kev. she just has this power to her that makes her stumble into everything and encounter disasters where there should be none.who sucks up to their boss? kevin. or well, she tries. what are their jobs? she’s a TA, he’s a bio teacher. who stresses the most? kev, we been knew. do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations? they enjoy them. more steven than her. she’s really only there to get a degree. are your muses financially stable? i wanna say yes but . . . kev’s stable ‘cos the espinas are and i don’t know about steven. teacher’s don’t make that much. 

HOME

who does the washing? kev doesn’t know how a washing machine works, so.who takes out the trash? kev can do that, she knows how that works.who does the ironing? nobody. they seem like a wrinkly pair. who does the cooking? steven, we been through this.who is more likely to burn the house down just trying? kevin.who is messier? kevin’s not messy she’s just scatter-brained, don’t bully her. who leaves the toilet roll empty? nobody, i hope.who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor? steven. kevin knows where the hamper is, she just doesn’t know where to take it.who forgets to flush the toilet? NOBODY. nasty.who is the prankster around the house? steven, he’s the fun dude. she’s the boring, uptight loser who should die.who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere? kev. she’d lose herself if she could.who mows the lawn? steven.who answers the telephone? steven. kev has phone anxiety, that’s my self-insert right there.who does the vacuuming? steven. the vacuum is too large and dangerous for a child like herself.who does the groceries? both. she likes to ride on the cart.who takes the longest to shower? steven, probably. she’s not a fan of . . . personal hygiene ? i don’t know, she’s gets in and she gets out. she’s not pippa.who spends the most time in the bathroom? steven, yet again.

MISCELLANEOUS

is money a problem? [ miss i wanna be racially ambiguous vc ] yuh.how many cars do they own? one. she doesn’t know how to drive.do they own their home or do they rent? she doesn’t fucking live with him, damnit. do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside? no.do they live in the city or in the country? no 2.0.do they enjoy their surroundings? yeah, kev’s a fan of sheffield and i’m guessing so is he or he would ditch. maybe.what’s their song? i said the song playing, muffled outside the dam door, during this thread is baby, i love your way by will to power ‘cos it’s a 1989 bop and sheffield’s just late with everything, kay. what do they do when they’re away from each other? rejoice in the lack of added dorkery. where did they first meet? the party. the rager. the . . . rave. i don’t know people don’t invite me to drink.how did they first meet? he said he liked her shoelaces and she said thanks i got them from the president.who spends the most money when out shopping? steven. kev is cheap and also broke.who’s more likely to flash their assets? neither has got any, so.who finds it amusing when the other trips over? probably steven. at first. but you know she keeps doing it and then it becomes concerning.any mental issues? ha. yeah.who’s terrified of bugs? steven has a huge fear of ladybugs, it’s a thing you can google it.who kills the spiders around the house? kev carries them out. for steven its ON SIGHT.their favourite place? i dunno, hell where they both belong. who pays the bills? neither.do they have any fears for their future? kevin only fears for her future. who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner? steven. what a good, good boy. sawyer helped him with it.who uses up all of the hot water? steven. he needs it to wash away his sins.who’s the tallest? steven. barely, she’s actually taller than she looks.who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other? steven. kevin’s too much of a chickenshit to.who wanders around in their underwear? steven put some damn clothes on.who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio? sawyer. how long has she been back there. creepy.what do they tease each other about? i said check back again in 3-4 business days, thanks. who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times? steven. not ‘cos she’s got a shite one ( pippa dresses her, remember ) but because kevin doesn’t have enough fashion range to judge anybody. do they have mutual friends? nope.who crushed first? kevin. it’s happening as we speak. any alcohol or substance related problems? n…no. maybe i’m wrong. maybe steven’s a secret crackhead. who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am? steven. bloody and bruised too. please get another braincell. who swears the most? steven. obviously.

[the-teddy-bear-butch]

okay babe, I love talking to you(never apologize for rambling) and I gay panic too, but please if you take anything out of this interaction let it be this.[in the most affectionate way possible] DO NOT PUT YOUR PLANTS ON A WATERING SCHEDULE (this is coming from me who has over 20 house plants. usually I let mine dry out completely unless the little instruction labels on the side of the pot says to keep damp but that's mostly for tropical plants) k with my horrified plant obsessed-ness out of that way.

my wrist is okay, it acts up every now and then ever since my brother pushed me off a rope swing in the middle of winter (so there was snow) and we didn't see there was a rock under it. I'd take you up on the offer to kiss it better if I could.

I do play both! I don't have an electric but i do have 2 acoustic (both are hand me downs but I repainted one and it's my pride and joy. the other one is blue)

singing at the top of my lungs in the car holds some of my favourite memories.

yes you get it! vibes and colours, but also vibes and places i your life.

I like folk music too but the closest I get to listening to it regularly is the band fleet foxes, but they're more of a 'you wander into the woods and get lost in time for 1,000 years but it's okay' kind of band. I listen to like every kind of music, in your reply name a genre and I bet I can give at least 1 song rec.

I fell the stutter thing it really only gets bad if i'm tired or like almost having a meltdown/anxiety attack.

it does apprear you've met your match because golden pothos are low water/low light ( I really want one lol)

my favourite house plant is a little Bolivian Inch Plant because it's leaves because the bottoms are purple (my second favourite colour) and the tops, when you look closely are almost glittery and look kinda like a fake plant.

My favourite plant in general is wild purple roses (ngl i'm not actually sure if they're wild or not that's what my grandma called them tho) they smell like everything good in the world and look pretty too!

you have a tattoo! that's so cool! I kinda want one too lol

yes, ew why do men. I told him no, motioned at my shirt and he kinda just... walked away? which i think actually went pretty well.

your eternally swooning damsel

-el

Ahdjakkdkaks I swear I’ve learned my lesson! Becky just gets watered when the soil is dry or she’s looking droopy! She’s doing great, I swear! I’ll get a picture in the morning or something as proof, but rn I am very cozy in bed haha

Oh dear! That sounds like it hurt! I’m sorry it hurts sometimes, and I hope it feels better soon! Mine acts up too, but mine is carpal tunnel (thanks for the awesome genetics, mom)

That’s literally the coolest thing ever. I have dreamed so much of repainting a guitar. I bet yours looks awesome! I’d love to see a picture, if you’re comfortable sending one! Did you repaint it a different color or add a design? <33

Yes! Vibes and places and people too. I love having too many playlists connected to random things and people in my life. It’s fun but sad to listen to the ones for people that have drifted away—but it’s something special to put together a new one when someone new and wonderful comes into my life!

Okay okay okay, hmmmmm. I know country isn’t a popular genre, maybe too adjacent to folk, but I grew up on the stuff. Any country recs? Alternatively, something like pop punk? Or anything random you feel like sharing! I know they’ll be lovely

Yeah, I think I’ve finally found the one plant I can’t kill 😂 Honestly it’s thriving. I’d still love a garden though, if I could keep it alive. Especially strawberries.

I definitely had to look those up, but they’re so adorable!! I love the tiny leaves and the overlapping shapes. And such a beautiful coloration! Are they very high maintenance?

That’s so cool! I love the smell of flowers, even if the pollen does tickle my nose. I wish we had more wildflowers around. I do see the occasional sunflower, but my favorite is Indian paintbrush season! They pop up EVERYWHERE around the same time every year and they’re so beautiful. The landscape around here is so boring and they liven it up so much.

If you’re ever looking for an excuse to infodump about plants, this is your invitation! <33

I do! I want more. Tattoos are cool as hell, and I was pleasantly surprised when this one didn’t hurt so much. On the topic of flowers, I’d really, really love a linework floral sleeve, just all kinds of pretty flowers!

Better than it could have! The shirt absolutely kills me, I don’t know how a man could see you wear that with cuffed jeans and rings and go “ah yes, a heterosexual” 💀 The cishets really are so blind to these things lmao

Your hopeless romantic of a knight,

- Max/Lo

[dangan-ronpa-v3-imagines-blog]

Claustrophobic NDRV3 boys with their S/O

Gotta apologize for a really huuuuuge delay and lack of quality in some places, but I hope you enjoy it! -- Mod Tsumugi

AMAMI RANTAROU

You never knew about his phobia because Amami never told you about this in first place.

However he told you once that he absolutely dislikes cars, but you didn’t take that in account.

Amami really likes to travel on his two feet after all.

But during one flight to another country you noticed him… trembling in fear?

You wanted to joke about his possible fear of heights, but abstains as you notice his condition just getting worse and worse.

He simply brushes it off as a little fear.

A little.

The plane is still on the ground and he’s shaking like crazy. That’s definitely not a something you can call a little fear.

He gives up a minute later and confesses to fear of being locked in a small place like car salons or even this plane.

Amami reassures you that he’s going to be fine, it’s not his first flight and he knows how to control himself in this situation.

But… you’re still worried. What if he actually manage to faint? What if he get a panic attack?

You don’t know how to act in these kind of situations.

And then you suddenly grab his hand (which is very sweaty). Amami is confused.

You slowly start drawing circles with your thumb on his sweaty arm. You tell him to clear his thoughts.

“Just… Think about something positive, okay? How about you think about me during this flight?”

He stares at you for a while. Then beams into a familiar smile and nods.

...Somehow he managed to fell asleep during the entire flight.

When he woke up he couldn’t stop mumbling about seeing you in his dreams.

OUMA KOKICHI

He’s actually claustrophobic, ablutophobic and lachanophobic!

But that’s a lie, y’know.

Seeing how enthusiastic he is voicing his fears on left and right, you also don’t take his lies into much credit.

Until one time when Angie got an empty bottle of out nowhere.

And this is where everyone started playing Seven minutes in heaven.

Being a fan of party games, Ouma immediately agreed to play it and dragged you with him too.

If he likes it, then his S/O would like this game as well!

After a ton of respins later, the bottle has landed on you and Ouma chirps out of joy and pulls you to the closet.

...7 minutes felt like 7 hours. Ouma still clings onto you and buries his head into your neck.

He is probably trying to lazily make out with you or something.

He tighten his grip when he hears Saihara outside of the closet announcing that the closet door… got stuck and they cannot open it right now.

In response, Ouma threw one of his big tantrums. That happens a lot, nothing special.

Just like always you keep telling him it’s alright, nothing is going to happen to him.

Honestly, you expect him to bright up and laugh at how naive you are, falling into his pitiful trap.

...Not right now, you guess. Ouma just starts hysterically sobbing into your shoulder.

You hug him tightly in return and start stroking his hair just the way he likes.

It seems that this calmed him down for a little bit.

The moment when the closet door opened, Ouma jumps away from you.

But of course this is a lie! He just wanted to test out something and it seems you fell into his trap!

Silly S/O-chan, he doesn’t have a stupid fear of being locked in a very small place.

Well, maybe he has one, but it’s nothing that serious though.

You don’t even know should you trust him this time or not.

Goddammit Ouma.

KIIBO

He immediately confessed to you that he feels rather uncomfortable in locked, dark places without any windows.

Which you find kinda weird, probably because you has never met a robot with a such phobia.

Kiibo scolds you for discriminating him. You apologize to him.

You tell him that he can count on you; if anything happens, please do tell about it, you don’t really want Kiibo to feel inconvenient.

He is just glad to have such supportive S/O as you!

One day he tells you that he needs a maintenance check, so he’s going to Iruma’s place for some time.

It usually takes 30 minutes for Iruma to check him, but… It seems that something has happened to him.

It’s been three hours since his departure, but no calls or messages from Kiibo has reached you.

Nothing from Iruma either. When you contacted her, she told you that she knows nothing either.

But then gave up and started moaning hardcore after you raised your voice at her.

W-well, maybe she, y’know, locked him in her lab. J-just maybe!

Before you could hang up you told her that you will be here in a minute.

When you showed up and Iruma already opened the door, you was greeted by Kiibo.

...Really sad Kiibo.

You swear if only he could cry, he would be crying non stop. Instead he had watery effect on his eyes and his voice box resonated with a whimpering sound.

The first second you saw him, you immediately pulled him into a hug and started patting his head.

And almost instantly shot a glare in Iruma’s side, which she took notice of and started drooling hardcore.

Well, at least Kiibo is safe and alright, you couldn't ask for more.

GOKUHARA GONTA

You lately just started getting this feeling that Gonta might be scared of small places.

And, well, you’re right.

Gonta is so used to outdoors that he completely dislikes staying indoors.

But he also mentions how smart you are!

With not so many clues you could figure out his troubles! He is really proud of his S/O!

But… He really feel bad for leaving you all alone during nights.

Sometimes you do sneak out and stays with him all night in the woods, but he really feels unhappy with a thought that he’s useless.

So Gonta will try his best to make his S/O happy!

He’s definitely resting in his room today. No more sleeping on trees.

…

Step one: failed.

He already feels guilty for waking you up at such late hour only to just tell you his worries.

After all, this is what gentlemen don’t do!

You’re soothing him, telling him that it’s not his fault.

What do the trick is when you suggest him an idea to sleep together. Maybe that will help--

Your words got cut off when Gonta suddenly pulled you into a tight embrace.

This must be it! Gonta’s S/O is so smart and thoughtful!

With you on his side, Gonta calmly fell asleep, without any tossing or turning.

You, however, couldn’t even close your eyes as you spotted caterpillars and other bugs sticking out from his hair.

SAIHARA SHUUICHI

You kinda figured it out and both of you talked about this problem.

He is, well, embarrassed to confess it, but you brush it off saying that it’s totally fine to have fears.

You tell him that it’s fine if he wants to cling to you if he suddenly gets an anxiety out of nowhere.

You giggle at his flustered reaction when he covers his face with his hat.

One day though you told Saihara that your friend is going to throw a big party and you’ll be there as well.

He tells you right away that he would like to accompany you; he’s free from his work and would like to meet with your friends.

Without thinking further you accepted his proposal right away.

Turns out it was a horrible idea and your boyfriend feels really guilty for it -- the party was literally crowded with a lot of people you may or may not know.

Minutes later you notice how horrible Saihara looks right now -- he’s ready to throw up and you honestly don’t know what to do.

So you immediately grabbed his hand and rushed outside.

Saihara non-stop apologizing to you right now, which is just makes the situation even worse.

In response you could only hug him. Shush him, comfort him before he could faint.

The way you embrace him is sappy enough, but you don’t mind it especially when Saihara look very peaceful right now.

His face became beet red when one of your friends spotted both you outside and couldn’t stop teasing Saihara.

SHINGUUJI KOREKIYO

Just like Gonta, you kinda guessed it all by yourself.

Not only Korekiyo was amazed, but also enchanted by your knowledge.

Human awareness is honestly astonishing and the way you use your skills and abilities is absolutely marvelous.

But yes, he’s quite claustrophobic. He doesn’t want to dwell into details though, which is alright to you.

You tell him that if the treatment is going to be complicated, you will try your hardest to help him overcome it.

Which leads Shinguuji into talking about your beauty for hours.

Anyway, you both started travelling around Japan to gather some information about its folklore.

About setsubun, youkai and more.

Not only because you want to study something about Japan, but also want to get closer with Korekiyo and mostly with his talent as a folklorist.

It happened in Kyoto, you and Shinguuji decided to stay in a not so expensive hotel for a single night.

One kind old lady escorted both of you to the room.

When you dropped your bag down, you could also hear Korekiyo letting down something from his hands with a loud sound.

You turned to him… Only to met with a collapsed on the wooden floor folklorist.

You shriek in surprise.

But you calmed down for a second after hearing his familiar “Kukuku…”, face still facing the floor.

HOSHI RYOUMA

The last thing he ever wants you to know is his fear of tight places.

He’s already disappointed in himself, but he can’t let you down out of all people.

So the moment when he overhears your conversation with Ouma and the second when the SHSL Supreme Leader drops a tiny hint of Hoshi being a clautrophobic…

He is ready to jerk Ouma down with a force.

Which, unfortunately, doesn’t happen -- with his “nishishi~” laugh Kokichi managed to make his escape.

An uncomfortable silence stretched between Hoshi and his S/O.

He immediately apologizes for making you to hear it -- he promises to deal with Ouma and his filthy mouth later.

Actually, he might do that right now.

Hoshi excuses himself once again and already makes his way out…

Only to be stopped by your touch on his shoulder.

It’s not that something complex or critical, you tell him.

It’s completely fine for having fears!

Knowing Hoshi he might actually hate himself for getting anxious over something stupid like claustrophobia, so you comfort him with a promise to overcome his fear.

Even if you don’t know how, you will do your absolute best to study about its treatment.

You can hear Hoshi mumbling a simple “thank you”, then how he’s glad to have you on his side.

Your smile just made him chuckle in amusement.

MOMOTA KAITO

He’s Momota motherfucking Kaito, he’s not scared of some stupid things!

Because he’s an astronaut for fucks sake! How he’s gonna stay in a space shuttle cabin is he’s completely terrified of small spaces!?

But he is, indeed, a claustrophobic person. Even Gonta, who was raised by wolves, figured it out like nothing.

Momota tells you that he’s going to be just fine -- in fact, he’s getting a treatment from various therapists.

He only asks you to keep Ouma away from him. And not let Shuuichi and Harumaki know about his fear.

While you do keep his first promise, you pretty much sure that both Saihara and Harukawa already figured his phobia out.

When Kaito’s phobia gets triggered, he’s pale. Extremely pale and sweating buckets.

During these times you always get overprotective over him: trying to shield him and give some space and always hugging him, reassuring him it’s going to be okay.

That easily does the trick -- Momota is a sucker for cuddles and always embraces you back in return.

Sometimes you may or may not see him using self-help books to cope with his phobia.

[tf2headshotcanons]

How would the mercs show their love and affection to their male s/o. Like dates they would take their s/o on, do they like kisses, etc

I want to clear a few things before I answer, if that's alright? Firstly, I personally don't ship any of them as gay (if you look at my sexuality blog, you'll see that only... 2? I ship as straight and the rest bi or pan. Those two are Sniper and Scout), so I apologise. It's because I don't see them as gay is why I'm running my own blog, because everyone else seems to make them gay so a lot of blogs are similar. I wanted to do something different with my different perspective (and no, I ain't asking for credit or praise doing that either!). So strictly gay (but not bi and stuff) asks are probably better left to the other blogs. Mainly because they fucking know their shit. I'm not gay, heck I've never been in a relationship, so actual loving shit is harder for me to do. does that make sense? O.oTo make it clear to that one cunt that sent me hate, || I do NOT hate gays || I just don't see the TF2 blokes as strictly gay (but many with the potential!) That's it! That's literally it!NOW I want to make it clear, If ya love someone. REALLY love someone. It doesn't matter if they have a dick or vagina. So this will sorta answer for both male and female, because if you love someone, their privates don't matter and that shouldn't differ how you love them. But for you, mate (a fellow Sniper fan), I'll try to gay it up for ya ;) Just... Forgive me if I'm not good at it. I'm not gay so I don't know how it differs. To me, love's love ain't it?HEADCANONMANNON TIME:Scout: Aww crap! He... He didn't expect to be... Ya know? He's honestly not comfortable with it, at first. Why? Because he always (forgive my lack of eloquentcy) wanks off to the most sexy and curvy women. But it never felt... Right. He's worried his mother won't accept him (little does he realise his father told her, and they both accept and love him, but it won't stop her teasing him). Scout... Well, Scout does like to see himself as confident and attractive, and to people he hits on - he can be! But when he actually loves someone? Bloody hell, is he kinda shy! Especially now that he's gay! So... He's timid, awkward, and sweaty. He's nervous and makes a lot of error, but ultimately he scores! He tries to be the "man" of the pair - you know, the protective and dominant one? But he's the lass, and we know it ;) Uhhh places, places... You know, fuck it. He's an amusement park kinda guy! Or a sporty guy (obviously) so places that get you out their! Scout... In the amusement park, would be out of his shell and just Scout. But if they did sports together, it'd be like a scene from Ghost, ya know, behind them and teaching them howta swing? That jobbie. Uhh what else do people do romantically? Um movies? Eat- Does he like kisses? Does he fuck! Though kissing Scout is like kissing a damn dog XP Any how, he'd overall be very competitive (but playful!) and try to protect them. He'd try to be the guy his dad wasn't to his mom. Basically, he'd see his partner as the "mom", but really that's him. Soldier: Ehh now, personally, this doesn't need too much of an answer. Because he has Zhanna, we basically know how he'd be in a relationship, and I'd personally see that he'd be the same with a bloke. Protective but knows he can fight, loveable and complimentary. Involving him in dumb shite and neck snaps. That sorta jobbie. And we already know he loves kisses, but the small and quick ones (preferably multiple times!). Honestly, it won't be much different if Zhanna had a dick... Well, she wouldn't have tits but still- My point still stands! He'd take him to the Raccoon Santuary, Training, Ball Games (ref: Demo), Merasmus' home. It's hard to say whether he'd be "alpha" because he'd most likely pick another strong character too. Chances are, they'd both be the "Dad" figure. I'm not sure whether he'd be a movie bloke. He ain't the brains, but he is the heart and spirit!Pyro: We... We don't even know what the fuck Py is. I'm going to use "they" as we don't know what they are, that would be the same for the same sex partner. Off topic, but If Pyro WAS a woman, I think she'd be good for Pauling. But you didn't hear that prediction from me ;) Anyhow, Pyro loves kisses! The same type as soldier, except loves them all day, errryday. If you give them one less kiss from the day before, they may get sad. Pyro loves watching movies, or colouring, or playing with toys, splashing in a pool, burning things or listening to a story. That's what they'd invite their partner to do. Pyro wouldn't be dominant, but they'd be the emotional crutch, they cuddler and emotive one. Basically, the "Mom" archetype. He's mostly passive BUT hurt their love and they WILL torture you! They're bossy and demanding, but full of love. Pyro just loves to be cuddled. Can we just assume for all of this that Pyro's a female and with Pauling?Demo: He's fucking cuddle central, ain't he? He's open to being gay. Suspected it. Doesn't mind it. Though I do think his Mum wouldn't accept - at first. In the end, she'd settle that he's happy and can adopt (And isn't lazy! That's probably her biggest peeve). Demo is the relaxed and chill lover. Doesn't stress, and although a hardworker can slip into bouts of laze. His man would have to be able to party but strict enough to snap him into place. Like Soldier, they may have gone out to the big ball game, or partying or drinking. You know what? Just suggest that it's Soldier he's dating! And yes, he loves kissing, but the sloppy passionate kind. He likes to take a date home to just cuddle and watch that shitty ghost drama. Oh, but his sword may be teasing you both. FYI. Overall, he's very easy going and outgoing. He'll need someone fun to keep up but somewhat strict to stop him relapsing.Heavy: He quietly mulls things over, but it's nothing new nor strange. Like Sniper, he's quiet and reclusive, though he's physically imposing. Though the quiet type, he's very protective and loving. Can even have a laugh. His ideal dates are quiet, reading, moving, or even deep discussions. Anything intimate and meaningful is a worthy date to him. Like Sniper, he probably needs someone a little more forward to approach him, but otherwise is the more protective one. He's very brotherly too and nurturing like a bear. He just loves time with his man, after all time is the most expensive currency. He's more reserved on kissing. You should know he loves you.Engi: He's another that may be mortified of being gay, mainly because the Southern stereotype of it being "unnatural". But he hasn't seen his old man in a VERY long time, so fuck his approval! Engi is another shy boy... At first. His not reserved, but he is nervous at first. He is what's known as a people pleaser and is worried to get it wrong. Where he's an adventurous inventor, he lacks in forward personality. His partner would have to be really smart and ambitious, though not afraid to try new things. He's romantic and kinky like the Medic. A bit freaky too~ So his bloke would have to be ready for anything INCLUDING surprise dominance. As far as dates go, he loves a traditional homemade dinner with a side order of philosophy and smart talk. He's also up for going to a pub but not much of a clubber, unlike Demo. He SEEMS shy at kissing, but he ain't.Sniper: He's honestly mortified at first. His already a pariah to his parents, God what if this disowns him?! God, it keeps him up at night and makes him sick. When the truth does come out, he doesn't make the first contact to his parents. In his mind, he's now an orphan. To his luck, his parents are just delighted that he's found someone to love. That's honestly their biggest wish for him. Like the Scout, he's withdrawn and reclusive. Not necessarily shy though. Just a loner, think the Wolf Children. It takes awhile to get in his heart, but when you do, he's the protective type. Awkward with intimacy and a little oblivious, which probably annoys his bloke but hey it's kinda cute! He's about the little things, holding hands and lying under the stars. He's probably the first to really settle too. He prefers natural dates, like camping or archery. Heck, maybe a bit of reading, knitting and crafting too! Or kayaking. He needs a slightly more dominant man, a friendly and approachable one, one who gives loners like him time and space, and understanding. Somewhere between social and anti. But he's a good lover, just a misplaced one. And traditional, just like his pa. He's more of a hand holder than a kisser, but his kisses mean a lot to his lover.Medic: The actual gay. He's eccentric and creepy, grumpy and funky, boisterous and ambitious. He'd actually be good for someone like Engi or Hoover. Dominant and frisky, yet around others he can be cold and withdrawn. Not in the shy way, but he's not always one to give out love. He loves to experiment and do some freaky things on the first date. Things that border illegal (like smuggling exotic animal pieces). Risk taker. He doesn't like kisses much, but in the mood he will fuck you silly. He seems prissy and cowardly, but he would be the Queen and dominantor of his man.Spy: Like his son, he's taken a back. Mainly because he's used to charming women but surprisingly, he doesn't mind the change. It's actually a turn on. He's a traditional charmer, dinner by candlelight and a movie. Though he's up to some freakier stuff if his lover allows it. He's the mysterious charmer, though he's drawn to sass and mystery himself. And though he can be quite feminine about his clothes, he still makes a good lover for a man. He's just VERY high maintenance. Sometimes, the mysterious men he likes probably can't cope with his high demands, but he calls them standards. He'll need someone who can cope with his high needs and mask. He appears self sufficient, demeaning and cold, but in reality, he loves to feel loved. He gives tough love but means it. And he loves heated passion, making out and hard sex.

[hardytoms]

1. Always post the rules 2. Answer the questions given by the person who tagged you 3. Write 11 questions of your own 4. Tag 11 people (or however many you want)

I’ve been tagged in this by @coffeeandcomposition​, @joliedarling​, and @call-me-winter-soldier​ so I have a ton of questions to answer and no one left to tag except @nightcourtfury​ and @khllysty​ if they haven’t been tagged already since I’m perpetually late on literally everything :-) Y’all can just answer your 11 questions of choice from the ones I answered already!!

Claire’s questions!! What color hair would you like to have if maintenance and cost weren’t an issue? PASTEL PINK What’s a song that never fails to make you cry? i mean i don’t cry at sad stuff v often but smother and medicine by daughter, without the lights by elliot moss, let it go by gaelynn lea What’s something that a lot of people go crazy for that you don’t really understand? babies, really pale tumblr edits What’s the most unbelievable thing that’s ever happened to you? ummmm right after i moved to spain i was walking around speaking in english to someone and these americans walked past me and said hi since we were speaking english too. i ended up talking to them and asking the younger woman where she went to university and she said the same univ i go to so we eventually started talking about hockey because that’s typical a) for me and b) for minnesotans and it turned out their family had season tickets to minnesota’s pro hockey team literally in the row behind the person i was speaking english with initially. which we found out in fuckin spain, it was wild like of all the people we happened to walk past while we just happened to be speaking english at that point like damn..the world is SO SMALL Ever had a paranormal experience? yes What’s your Starbucks order? mm girl you already know :-) Do you like your candles floral, sweet, fruity, clean, or musky? musky! Do you wear any jewelry daily? yes i always have 7 earrings in, bracelets my mom made, a necklace she got me, and my rings!! Which movie has your favorite score? lord of the rings omg easy Which trope are you most tired of in media? BURY YOUR GAYS, FORCED HETEROSEXUALITY, born sexy yesterday, queer baiting, ugly guy hot wife, THE NO FUN WIFE, abuser gets redemption, nerdy guy best friend who exists only for comedic relief (bonus hate if he’s asian), tbh i have so many i get tired of lmao Which book would you most like to see made into a movie? ummmm i want them to remake harry potter cuz my favorite books would be fucked up by hollywood i just know it and they did a shitty job 

Jolie’s Questions!! What was your favorite album as a pre-teen/teenager? AVRIL LAVIGNE’S LET GO What’s your comfort food? mmm i don’t really have one?  Do you have really vivid dreams or really vague dreams? Generally really vivid but I always know I’m dreaming in my dreams Do you believe in astrology? Nope! Which fictional character do you most resonate with? buffy summers and tara chambler What is one thing you are most complimented on? physical would be my eyebrows but not physical is i get told i’m funny a lot Brag a little bit!! what’s your favorite thing about yourself? i’m smart af Have you laughed today? if so, what made you laugh? omg what DOESN’T make me laugh Is there anything you should be doing right now that you’re not doing? yes :-) What color is your bedspread? purple! What’s your harry potter house? ACTUALLY JOLIE I’M HAVING AN IDENTITY CRISIS ABOUT THIS i’ve spent so long thinking hufflepuff but i think i’m actually a slytherin based on @sortinghatchats​ 

Angelina’s questions!! Who inspires you? Who do you aspire to be like? Malala yousafzai for both!! I also would love leslie knope’s determination, buffy summers’s strength, hermione’s intelligence/discipline, tara chambler’s kindness If you could trade lives with one person for an entire day who would it be and why? i’m not sure i would trade lives with anyone for a day cuz it’d probs just make me envious lmao Do you believe in ghosts? yes What accomplishments are you most proud of? graduating university with distinction, surviving high school The best vacation you’ve ever taken? paris with my best friend was really cool even if that city is disgusting lmao but we also went to rome which i loved !! that’s my fave city Where is your favorite place to go when you feel sad or nervous? home so i can hang out with my doggies What was the place you grew up like? very green and suburban Do you have a book that really changed the way you thought about something? honestly not really!!  Which fictional character would be the most interesting to meet in real life? hmmm maybe rhysand from a court of thorns and roses???  What is the dumbest way you’ve been injured? looool jolie and kristine will remember this. in january or so i was cutting a lime for tequila shots and i sliced right into the tip my finger and cut it REALLY badly like it bled for hours and i have a scar on my finger from it, i almost sliced off the tip of my finger tbh it was so bad and it hurt like a bitch Favourite style in architecture? baroque!!!! i also like tudor revival and colonial for houses

[inst4nt-n00dles]

08.07-08.08.2017 - Time Away from Home

It’s okay to feel a little homesick the first couple days after arriving in a new place. Having been in Taiwan for only 2 days, it’s understandable but probably not expected from me, especially since I’ve been counting down the days of my summer to this trip. It was hollow excitement, merely something to get me through the final weeks of summer courses because it was enticing to have time to be isolated and really take care of myself in an unknown place. Now don’t get me wrong either, Taiwan has made itself out to be better than I remembered, and I’m approaching new ideas and places with an excited and lighthearted approach. But an empty bubble still sits inside me.

I decided that the accurate term for what I’m feeling is homesickness. But I’m not homesick for home; home hasn’t felt like home for over a year now. I’m homesick for him. It’s quiet, and sits just under the surface. This kind of homesickness hurts in a dull way. Tickles a little but weighs you down a lot. You can only half enjoy something, someplace, and you feel sad lacking the one person you’d actually enjoy it with. Pathetically, I feel at home when I’m with him, no matter where I am. Of course, not having directly encountered him since our breakup in October could possibly make this “home” feeling feel like an illusion, but in the end, that’s what he was to me all this time in my heart and mind.

And having to redefine home in this scenario might be a bit of a hassle, but explaining myself is better than feeling unsure about what I feel and second guessing everything. Home is comfortability. Home is safeness. He was it for me. I’ve repeated this to my best friend and to him so many times, and no one really understood and I don't blame them. It's all within my mind and feelings anyway. He treated me well. Not right, but well. I never expected perfection out of him, and he reached my expectation of imperfection perfectly. He made me laugh and made me feel so comfortable that I could goof off with disturbing humor in which unlike others, he’d return them, sending us cackling. I began to incorporate so much of his life into my life that part of me was him and his lifestyle. I devoted myself to make him smile and laugh. But when he went away, he took a whole chunk of me with him. My home got up and left and I've kind of been wandering helpless and lost.

Now I’ve been told to move on, and I’ve been told I’m delusional. But there’s nothing in me that makes me think I’m wrong about how I feel. This year was a rude awakening to me that I lost something special. This year I cowered away from guys in fear, this year I went on dates with guys that just didn’t make me feel remotely the same as he did; this year I’ve been approached by guys so rudely that I really just am not interested in finding another anymore. He seemed to be under the impression that I would find someone better, more amazing when I left for college; he was so wrong. I wish he had known just how devoted I was to him. One year later and I'm still here crying about it, it could've survived and not just survive but thrive with liveliness and energy. He took me, a girl who was kind of notorious with keeping and losing relationships rather heartlessly before having laid eyes on him, and pretty much domesticated me. Willingly. He has me, honestly an above average looking girl with an even more above normal personality broken down, crying too many nights and disinterested in anyone else but him. He literally knows that he has me willingly at his disposal, undeniably infatuated by him, but apparently that significance doesn’t matter. The distance still does.

I guess I’ve been a real fanatic about distance lately. It has broken and strained all the important relationships in my life not because I couldn't handle it but because I seemed to be the only believer of distance survival and maintenance. I guess I kind of stand alone with that belief because of my dad. Ruler of long distance relationships in my life. He moved away for business when I was only a sophomore, both my sisters away at college. Of course they came home on the weekends but my dad’s move really influenced my young. 4 years later and I guess my views on distance relationships was deluded because my parents made it work. They made it work with almost daily phone calls at 10PM, 10AM across the world. It worked because of our family group chat, occasional pictures and updates, and visits. It worked, in my opinion, because we all believed in each other and loved each other enough. But apparently the fact that we are a family seems to disqualify itself from my views on long distance relationship. It’s not. In the end, they’re also just people in this world with a connection they don’t want to lose it. So why should I be shamed for being like this?

I think what really hits me hard can be explained from an example of today. I was watching that Indian movie with my dad and uncle in a nice apartment, comfortable, and on a nice couch. In my mind, they disappeared and I began to envision it was my own home. But I was expecting someone else for company. Him. I wanted to cuddle up with him like we used to when we watched movies. I wanted to play cute and push his buttons a little so that we can giggle and have a good time. I imagine this a lot now. Life with and after college with him.

But that's just highly unlikely as we are still trying to even make it as friends (don’t be fooled, I’m still the pushy clingy one and he still responds a million years too late). I can say that this trip is going well 2-3 days in, surrounding myself in a different culture, constantly hearing a language that isn’t English, eating and hydrating well, and reading, writing, watching things that empower me. It’s like I’m in rehab right now or something. I’m okay with it though, I like the idea of being spiritually enlightened or something. But yet, in the back of my head, I still hear his name, my own voice calling out his name. Sometimes in laughter and delight, sometimes in despair, sometimes in wails of pain. Over and over again, randomly. This is going to be a longer 3 weeks than I thought. I want my home. I want to go back home.

[bennet-darcy]

do all of the asks if your up for it !

I’m putting this under a read more because wow, it got long. 

Sunrises: What is something you are looking forward to?

I’m really, very excited to have my exams over with, and to have finished my first year of uni! My last exam is on the 30th, so I’ll be done soon, yay! 

Also, once I’m done with exams, I’m going to be going home to California for a bit to visit family, which I’m very excited about! Then after that, I’ll be going to Colorado to see my friends and family there, which I am also very excited about! 

Honeybees: What is something you have done recently that you are proud of? It can be anything at all, even just waking up every morning.

Since I’m getting ready to move back home to the US, I’ve been reflecting a lot lately on my time here in the UK, and I feel really proud of myself for what I’ve accomplished in this amount of time. Moving to London, I had no connections. No friends or family here to make the transition easier. I was 5000 miles away from everyone I knew. The first few weeks living here were really rough, and I was constantly homesick, and fearful about the simplest things: going to get groceries, going to class, etc. 

After about 2 months, though, I made some really great friends and developed great connections with lots of people at my uni, and a few from outside uni, as well. I feel really comfortable with living in London, and being on my own, and taking care of myself, now. It’s been a huge learning experience and I’m really very proud of myself for developing sort of a life for myself here. 

Okay sorry for that novel, but yes. I’m proud of myself for what I’ve accomplished in the past 9 months, living in London. 

Roller skating: What are your hobbies?

Recently, I’ve been taking dance fitness classes that are really a lot of fun. I’ve been enjoying that, a lot. I sometimes take random walks throughout the city, and check out local landmarks. When I was living at home, I played the violin every once in a while, but I’ve been out of practice for so long at this point, I probably don’t know how to play anymore, tbh. I also enjoy reading and cooking/baking (but with cooking/baking, I have to be in the right Mood to enjoy it?) Yeah. 

Stars: What are your favorite blogs?

http://www.johnwatsonblog.co.uk/

http://www.thescienceofdeduction.co.uk/

Poppy flowers: What are your favorite flowers?

This…. I can’t.. Please don’t do this to me. I have way too many favorites, I cannot choose. Some of my favorites in no particular order are: roses, peonies, tulips, daisies, lavender, sunflowers, and carnations  

Lemonade: What is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for you?

!!!!!!!! warning: gay screaming ahead !!!!!!!!

Okay so. At this point, you all know that uh, I’m gay, and that Devan is incredible and so lovely and a very important person in my life. 

So. For Valentine’s Day, she made me a video thing? It was a compilation of clips from movies/tv shows that, all held some significance to either me or her, or both of us. She included clips from Love Actually (which is a fave for both of us), Ghostbusters (the first movie we had gone to see together), Pride and Prejudice (my favorite movie in the world), Moulin Rouge (another movie that we had watched together), The Office (a show that we both enjoy) and Sherlock (because sherlock and john are gay and in love and lovely, also Devan and I sort of began talking with each other because of Sherlock so :’) ) 

But yes, that was probably one of the sweetest things that anyone has done for me. It was just !!!! so customized, and each clip had special significance, and I can tell she put a lot of thought into it, and I cried so much when she sent it to me, and it still makes me tear up when I watch it. Wow. Literally just. Wow. Have I mentioned that she’s incredible? Oh my gosh.

Okay, gay screaming over. Sorry for being a sappy mess. 

Dogs: What do you look for in friends?

Usually it’s important to me that the other person and I have at least a few things in common with each other, such as a common interest. I think that’s what the majority of my friendships have been based on. 

Other than that, it’s really nice when I find someone that has the same sense of humor as me. 

Painting: If you could dye your hair any color, what would it be?

I’ve always thought pastel colored hair is soooo pretty and cool looking! Light purple and light pink hair, especially. But I feel like I really would Not be able to pull it off. So uh. I’ll stick with brown hair, thanks. 

Smiles: What is the greatest compliment you have ever received? What is a compliment you wish someone would give you?

Okay so I don’t know if this is the greatest compliment I’ve ever received, but this is the one that’s most current and fresh in my mind, so I’ll share this one: 

On Thursday, I went to my last class of the year, which was my “Counselling Psychology” class. My teacher for that class, Augusta, is my favorite teacher I’ve EVER had. I really admire her a lot, and she teaches really well, and just has a great personality. 

Anyway, I was a bit early to class on Thursday morning, and it was just her and I in the classroom. So during this time, she says, “Amber, I just wanted to tell you, I’ve just finished grading all of the coursework for this class, and your presentation as well as your reflective essay were incredible. You’re very good in this subject, and I can tell that you’re passionate about it. I hope you continue to study psychology because I know you would do well in this field. You’re a very bright young lady.” AND I LITERALLY JUST ABOUT DIED! (And I low-key cried a little bit.)

I just !?!??!??! Coming from her, that meant SO much to me, because I admire her so much, so to hear that was just so meaningful and great. 

Fairy lights: If someone wanted to get to know you, what should they read/watch/listen to?

Read Pride and Prejudice, watch Pride and Prejudice, and listen to the Pride and Prejudice soundtrack. jkgsjkghsjg. I’m (kind of) joking. Umm?? I don’t know. I think my “Top 25 Most Played” playlist on my itunes sums me up pretty well. It’s a mix of Classical music, Ed Sheeran, Phantom of the Opera, Enya, Christmas music, and Pride and Prejudice. 

Dancing: Describe your dream date.

Fun fact (or, a rather depressing fact): I’ve actually never been on a proper date, so this is all brand new to me, and I’m basing this answer on theory, rather than previous experience.

But um. I feel like I’m pretty low maintenance, in this regard. Cuddling and watching movies with someone sounds ideal, honestly. Or just like. Taking a nap. fjksdhgkj. Other than that, like if we’re actually GOING somewhere, maybe like? A museum or art gallery? The aquarium, maybe? I don’t know jdgksghk. My lack of experience with this is really showing, oops. 

Rainbows: What always makes you feel better when you’re sad?

I call my mom and tell her what’s going on, and she’s always able to help me feel better about basically anything. I love my momma. 

I also like watching comedy movies/tv shows when I’m feeling sad. I’ve been watching a lot of Brooklyn 99 lately. 

Beaches: If you could go anywhere in the world, right this moment, where would you go?

Right this moment? Nowhere. I’m comfortable in bed, and I don’t wanna move. 

Cats: What do you like to do on lazy days?

Sleep in as late as possible, stay in pajamas all day, bake cookies/cupcakes, watch a movie. Something along those lines. 

Sunflowers: What do you want other people to think of you?

Umm.. I hope others think of me as being a kind, trustworthy, caring person. That’s so cliche and cheesy, but that’s really what’s most important to me. 

Laughter: List 5 things that make you happy.

Watching my favorite movie

Sleeping in late

Spending time with people I love 

Eating my favorite food 

Petting cats and dogs 

Balloons: When do you feel most like yourself?

I really enjoy traveling. It’s a really exciting, fulfilling feeling to have the opportunity to travel to places I’ve not been before. I feel most like myself when I’m wandering around a new city/country, trying to understand the geography, the language, the culture, etc. 

Daisies: What is your favorite quote?

“You must know, surely you must know, it was all for you. You are too generous to trifle with me. I believe you spoke with my aunt last night, and it has taught me to hope as I’d scarcely allowed myself before. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I would have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love… I love… I love you. And I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.” - Mr. Darcy 

Trees: Name one thing you have learned this past year that has made you a better person?

I have learned that my life and my decisions are not dependent on anyone else’s opinions or expectations. It’s up to me to create a life that I feel satisfied with, regardless of how it makes other people feel. 

Polaroids: What is your favorite thing about yourself?

I’m a very dedicated person, and a very hard worker. I’m confident in my abilities to achieve the things that I want. 

Sunsets: If you could paint the sky any colors, what would they be?

I love when the sky turns that pink/purple color during sunset! It’s so nice, and I wish it would stay that color forever. 

[ryttu3k]

Robo-Syrneas, vaporwave-Syrneas (can't remember their proper name, whoops!), and Modern AU Link! ☾ - sleep headcanon★ - sad headcanon☆ - happy headcanon■ - Bedroom/house/living quarters headcanon☮ - friendship headcanon♦ - quirks/hobbies headcanon☯ - likes/dislikes headcanon♒ - cooking/food headcanon☼ - appearance headcanonൠ - random headcanon

For reference, vaporwave!Syrneas is the one in these pictures, and modern AU Link is my BotW daughter (with a few changes, since I drew this pre-canon). For robo!Syrneas, going to go with the AU where, between cycles of Xerneas being awake and active, Kalos builds a robot version in their image to maintain the land.

Sleep headcanon: Robo!Syrneas - well, robot, haha. That said, they’re solar powered, and so usually take advantage of that fact to go into sleep mode at night. It’s useful both for maintenance and for appearing more… organic, I guess?

Vaporwave!Syrneas - he gets energy from living energy, so living in a city, he literally doesn’t sleep. He’s a little more low-energy at night, but there’s still plenty of activity around the place to keep him going, so no sleep there.

And Link is just a regular human who needs sleep like anyone else, and while she’d rather be up and about and doing things, she does like sleeping in XD

Under a cut, this gets long!

Sad headcanon: Robo!Syrneas - just going to go with Robo - is, well, lonely. There’s no one else like them in the world - there are other robots, but they alone were modelled after a god and given this huge responsibility. Friends would be very nice!

Vaporwave - let’s go with that - isn’t so much sad as angry and frustrated. The world used to be so goddamn lush and now there’s concrete everywhere and it’s uncool. He used to be a deity of forests, now he’s a deity of, well, weeds, and it’s kind of a downgrade, y'know!

And Link (no name change there, whew) is a resiliant, tough teenage girl, but she still has those moments of insecurity; her father still very much wants her to join the army eventually, he thinks she could be brilliant in it, and she just. Wants to be a chef.

Happy headcanon: PLANTS MAKE ROBO HAPPY. FLOWERS. SUNSHINE. BEING OUTDOORS. Like tbh even if they weren’t programmed to replace Xerneas they’d probably still end up as a gardener or something.

Vaporwave also loves plants and sunshine but it’s more of this sense of almost like? Smug satisfaction? Like “fuck you concrete my plants can kick your ass”, haha.

Link is made happy with food. Please give her nice food. Or cookbooks and ingredients, it’s like food with some assembly required. And she actually enjoys assembling it, so there is that!

Bedroom/house/living quarters headcanon: Robo lives outside :D Don’t worry, they’re waterproof! They just sort of roam from natural environment to natural environment, and take shelter anywhere necessary during bad weather.

Vaporwave also roams a lot, but he does at least have a sort of home. …It’s an abandoned mall that was once very classy and had marble statues and shit, and then it was industrialised and got full of neon, and now it’s abandoned and full of plants. Somehow, the muzak is still playing. Plantwave af, basically!

And Link, again, has the most normal home - she lives in an apartment with her father near the military base where he works. Her room is full of photos (mostly taken by Zelda) and a general colour scheme of blue and white, with lots of potted plants and… usually a few plates, bowls, and glasses that she needs to take to the kitchen :|

Friendship headcanon: Robo has plant friends :’) Honestly, no, it’s a pretty isolated life, and they don’t communicate with a lot of people, unfortunately!

Vaporwave has one friend, and that’s Diantha/Diancie, who’s sort of a sibling, too. They’re familiar with the other fairies (the Tapus and Magearna), but honestly Magearna legit wigs him out because she’s an artificial fairy what is this fuckery and the Tapus have their own territories to protect.

Link makes friends easily and happily - while Zelda is her best friend, she’s also really good friends with Mipha and Sidon, Riju (who’s like a little sister), Yunobo (who she babysits sometimes), and sees Urbosa, Daruk, and Kass as older siblings, almost. She, uh, doesn’t get on well with Revali, too much of a rivalry going on there, haha.

Quirks/hobbies headcanon: Look, don’t tell anyone, but Robo actually really enjoys reality TV. Shhh.

‘Fucking with humans’ isn’t really a hobby for Vaporwave, it’s more a career description ;D But really, he’ll often go to human-habitated areas and sometimes? Play tricks? Mostly benignly, but he is a fairy, I mean come on. Trickery is in their blood.

Link is sporty! She likes horse riding, she likes archery, she likes swimming, running, climbing… always on the move, basically. She’s on the school track team, although there’s sometimes a bit of legal fuckery in interscholastic meets because not all the schools accept her as part of the girls’ team even though she’s been on puberty blockers since she was eleven and is now on estrogen and doesn’t have any ‘too masculine’ characteristics and is short af so why can’t she compete with the girls, huh? Totally rude.

Likes/dislikes headcanon: Robo loves plants ;D But really, they’re kind of singleminded in that they weren’t really programmed for much else, so it’s like PLANTS ANIMALS NATURE some other stuff NATURE PLANTS bits and pieces NATURE ANIMALS PLANTS. The bits and pieces do have individual likes and dislikes that have nothing to do with their programming, though; they like reality TV shows, especially interior decorating stuff, and the smell of coffee, and they really, really dislike cars. Not because they pollute, but because they’re too noisy! >:(

Vaporwave likes the wilderness. Which mostly no longer exists in this AU. He tends to watch nature documentaries to feel better, then gets upset at the lack of them, and it’s. Complicated. So that would be both a like and a dislike, probably! For more straightfoward likes - coffee and food.

For Link, see lead image :D

Cooking/food headcanon: Irrelevant for Robo. They’re solar-powered! They do like the smell of some foods, though, especially coffee.

Vaporwave doesn’t need to eat, but enjoys doing so, he just hasn’t bothered to learn how to cook. He tends to trick humans into giving him nice foods, stuff like that, since, well, being a nature fairy doesn’t really pay that well, haha.

And Link’s greatest love :’) Her father taught her the basics, and she taught herself the rest, out of cooking shows, cookbooks, and her own intuition. Her favourite ingredients to work with are fruity dishes and mushroom dishes, although she also makes a damn good risotto, and a fruit cake that Zelda would go to war for.

Appearance headcanon: This is easier with visuals! For robo!Syrneas, just pick and choose from this tag tbh it keeps changing. The usual standards are a floral-print sweater, shorts, and gumboots, though. They range in colours and patterns but that’s the general theme, and they like modifying their appearance with floral decals!

Vaporwave is linked above. He always covers his eyes, though, since… well, fairy. It doesn’t show so well in the pictures, but he has rainbow strands through his hair, like random hair that’s just the colour of Xerneas’ canon horns.

And Link… Link is short :’) Why is everyone else so tall. Why. Riju, get over here and stand next to Link so she feels tall. She also usually has hair clips, thanks to Zelda. While she does like pretty dresses, since she’s so active, she’ll usually default to pants and t-shirts she can run around in, and saves the prettier stuff for more formal occasions.

Random headcanon: *collapses face first on the post*

[undeadmoonrabbit]

Undead Moon Rabbit

Well it’s a bit late, but I felt like making a new years’ post. 2016 was a big year for me. Huge, actually. The hugest. The year I rose from the dead. When I started going by undeadmoonrabbit online, I was in a dark place; socially isolated and despairing of the future. The emphasis at the time was on dead. Rabbits die of loneliness (as the story goes), and I was a dead thing that was somehow still moving. But at some point the meaning changed. I’m an undead rabbit now. Returned to life and full of hope. Parts of me, body and mind, don’t work exactly right. Other parts are falling apart or need regular maintenance. But that’s just how things are with the undead. It’s a patchwork, haphazard kind of existence, but not a bad one for what it is.

This is long, and 100% just reminiscing about my transition. If you know me you’ve almost certainly heard all this before. I just wanted to have this written down for myself, I think. You’ve been warned!

I’ve come a long way since that night last January, crowded in a basement, a group of friends sitting down to play Undertale (which will always be special to me now, for several reasons), mustering my courage, promising myself that I’ll do it after dinner for sure. I remember saying something like “before we start, I have something I need to say,” and then just shaking violently for like an entire minute.

It’s never been that hard since.

I’ve come out to my family, other acquaintances, my supervisor at work, then my peers at work, the neighbors... never once did I shake like that. (I do remember there being some shaking with my supervisor). Anyway if I had to conjure a patronus tomorrow, that would be the memory I’d use.

Since then, my life has been a whirlwind of transformation. I’d intended to transition for a long time, but coming out made it real. Suddenly it wasn’t something I could put off to the distant future, but an aching, urgent need. Because of my circumstances, I ended up seeking treatment in a foreign country where I only 70% speak the language. But I got it! In the end I figured out what I was supposed to do, and I did it.

I’m still a bit staggered that I did. Sometimes it feels like I’m living someone else’s life. If you told me five years ago that in five years I would be living alone in Japan as an out trans woman, I would have been.... surprised. At the risk of self-deprecation (self-aggrandizement?), it sounds like something someone much cooler than me would do.

And I had two huge, pleasant shocks!

The first is that the two problems that had plagued me all my life - my longstanding desire to be a girl/dislike of being a boy, and my depression - were actually the same problem. Perhaps it’s overly simple or premature to declare my depression cured. It’s not like I’m never sad these days (honestly I had kind of a bad day today), but it’s different. And it’s been different since I started taking hormones. I still have bad emotions, but the screaming hollow sensation that would accompany them is gone. And I don’t spiral downwards so eagerly anymore. And my overall mood is just, higher. Much.

I remember, a few weeks ago, realizing with a start one day that I genuinely hadn’t wanted to die or had a suicidal thought since I started hormones. I still haven’t. It’s been months. I mean. It used to be a constant in my life. It’s so weird for it to just be gone.

And the other shock. Well. Everyone (every American, that is) told me that Japanese people and especially rural Japanese people are conservative and intolerant.

They were wrong.

My boss, my neighbors, my doctor (who literally told me ‘let me be your strength’/力になります), even my coworkers (mostly (they take a lot of reminding)), have all accepted me. I guess the remaining test is how the students will react.

Well, I think we teach people to be afraid maybe more than we need to. Almost everyone who stood in my way during this process did it because they thought they were protecting me.

This got long, but I want to express how grateful I am. First, to my enbyfriend @ureshiiichigo. Thank you for supporting me, and encouraging me, and pushing me forward whenever I would falter. You never gave up, even when I almost did.

Falling in love with you was the other miracle that happened to me this year. Being in a long distance relationship has not always been easy, or as satisfying as we’d like, but it infallibly makes me smile whenever I talk to you.

And all my other friends, thank you for accepting me and welcoming me and really giving me no reason to shake like that time I came out last January.

And I want to thank all of the wonderful transgender bloggers on tumblr, who showed me that transgender can be a thing of hope and not despair.

It’s a harder path than some, but one worth walking, I think.

Here’s to 2017!

[bryonysimcox]

The Duality of this Strange Existence: Week 9, Spain

Stuck in Spain for the foreseeable future, it’s easy to feel deflated. And I have been. But I’ve also seen the duality of things, opposing sides of the same situation which now affects us all. As coronavirus continues to grind the world to a halt, I continue writing in an attempt to make sense of life on the road.

This blog post comes a few days late because I honestly couldn’t bring myself to write it. What do I write? Where do I begin? From a micro perspective, my life here has been pretty uneventful, and yet from the macro perspective, so much has happened around the world due to the outbreak of Covid-19 that it feels like we have enough news for a whole year from just one week. And yet, the only perspective I can write from is my own. Armed with the encouraging words of friends and family, I am inspired to push on and get some of the thoughts in my head and experiences from our ninth week ‘on the road’ down onto paper.

One of the ways I’ve started to see our experiences in lockdown is through this idea of duality.

Every situation that I’m in (and no doubt most of us are in) sort of seems to have two sides. I alluded to this in last week’s blog post, and the way in which it’s possible to see great sadness, selfishness and suffering at the moment, but also to be inspired by so many of the positive responses and the potential positive outcomes of this pandemic.

From a chronological perspective, our week has been divided into two clear halves, another duality of sorts. George and I spent the first half of the week in Suzi the Van, in the Marina in València which we’d been staying for a while. Whilst the Marina had all the basic amenities and we were safe there, the confines of a space that small were really taking its toll. On Tuesday, when I was made to return to the van by a security guard after attempting to walk short laps nearby, I broke down into tears. Never before have I valued the outdoors so much, wanted to stretch my legs and take in some fresh air. It was heartbreaking, and scary to lose a liberty I take for granted.

As urban areas seem to be hotspots for the virus, València was under tight control. A simple trip to the supermarket hammered that reality home, when George and I were asked by Police to walk on opposite sides of the street from one another, and a one metre distance was enforced by cashiers and guards in supermarkets. Gloves are mandatory in some supermarkets, and most folk you do see are wearing masks.

(images, left to right) Being made to walk on separate sides of the road in Valencia, tape marking out 1 metre separations in the supermarket, and gloves to be worn by customers.

Extreme measures quickly start to feel normal.

Whilst we tried to make the best of being in Suzi the van, having fun together and finding any possible way to entertain ourselves, the claustrophobia-inducing confines were soon wearing thin. After making arrangements with the family friend whose cottage we had stayed in a few weeks earlier in Catalonia, we quickly made the six-hour journey up north to return to their cottage as a safer lockdown spot. George and I were also conscious that restrictions on driving were only likely to tighten, so we made the escape while we could. That said, we weren’t stopped by Police the whole way up from València to Palamos.

Relying on the generosity of others can be a very humbling thing. I am reminded every day that I wouldn’t be here in Spain, with a safe place to stay during the (now extended) ‘State of Alarm’ if it wasn’t for the kindness of others. In times like these, I think we will see more sharing of resources, and the idea of asking for help becoming more normalised too. If I can help someone else in any way, please do reach out to me.

(images, left to right) Saying goodbye to Suzi’s parking spot at La Marina, silly antics as George refuses to get out of bed in the morning, and making our way north to Catalunya.

Since leaving València, the second half of our week has been rather more comfortable than the first, as we’re now in the countryside and with a house to stay in. That said, I’ve been pretty miserable these past few days, burdened with the knowledge of the global crisis and the impact it’s having on literally everyone I know. Which brings me to another duality -

Whilst those of us in lockdown who aren’t sick with the virus technically have all this unique free time to potentially make and create, the panic and anxiety induced by the situation can be crippling.

Obviously, everyone’s working situation is different: some people are working from home, others have lost their jobs, others are being paid some or all of their wage but don’t have any work to do, and then there are the doctors and nurses, supermarket attendants and maintenance workers who literally risk their lives to go to work and keep the situation afloat. But, looking more generally at the whole population, when else in history have so many people been given a chance to stay at home, with no routine and no commitments? 

When trying to think positively, I have seen this lockdown as an opportunity for making and creating on an unprecedented scale, for people to use the freedom and inspiration as a platform for self-expression, a sentiment echoed countless times online too. And yet, even though I’ve managed to get things done and make things in this last week, it has always been counteracted by another feeling in my head and heart, one which has pushed against the desire to ‘do’ with a desire to… mourn? I’ve heard the anxiety triggered by the unknown of the future termed as ‘anticipatory grief’, and it’s exactly this which can cripple any desire or instinct to create and make. The idea of anticipatory grief is explored in an article which my friend Greg sent to me today, and I found it incredibly useful. You might do too.

Living with an unknown future is forcing a shift towards being more present.

(images) Small things that I am trying to grateful for, like fresh houmous, strawberries blooming and an open fire.

You don’t realise how much you base your life around an assumed future until that future crumbles into the unknown. I assumed that I would be able to fly home for a doctor’s appointment in April, I assumed that Las Fallas festival would take place in València and George and I would finish our commercial work linked to it, I assumed that we would catch a ferry to Italy and drive south-east through Slovakia and Croatia and that we would see our friends later in Greece as planned.

Obviously a big outcome of all those future things now being cancelled or uncertain causes anxiety and the ‘anticipatory grief’ that I mentioned. But it has also triggered a return to the present. I wonder if other, more mindful, cultures are generally more present-focussed because they don’t have the luxury of the certainty of the future - places where death is more frequent and disasters more likely to happen, unsheltered by the insurance and capital we are so ‘lucky’ to have in the Western world. For me, I am trying ever so hard to embrace the present. It is an uncomfortable feeling, to be okay and connected to the now rather than to what is to come, but it also feels like a very valuable mindset to nurture.

A focus on the present is perhaps why so many of us have suddenly connected with friends and family digitally. Of course, some of these calls are intended to replace what would usually be a face-to-face catch up, but for George and I, we wouldn’t be set to see a lot of people for a while as we’re overseas anyway. And so all these phone conversations, WhatsApp catch-ups, Zoom calls and Skype videos have been a direct action to bring those people that mean something to us closer. People are reaching out to each other, in the present, and are showing the gratitude, connection and care they have for each other through just saying hi. Perhaps we all forgot quite how important these people were to us because we were always thinking in the future?

(images, left to right) Connecting with friends in Australia, George going a little bit insane, and my first attempt at making oat milk (which I would rate a totally mediocre 5/10) which was a good short-term distraction from the overwhelming global crisis and a good starting point to make improved versions!

I’ve also been reminded that the internet can serve to connect and inform, but it also has the potential to alienate and divide people.

I honestly can’t imagine experiencing lockdown without access to the internet. This week alone, I’ve probably read tens if not hundreds of useful, mind-expanding, informative news articles, in addition to opinion pieces and videos related and linked to coronavirus. I’ve been able to watch (along with 80 or so others) our friend Dan live-stream a spirit-lifting musical performance from his bedroom as part of the ‘Solo En Casa’ festival, and I’ve taken part in a genre-defying guided meditation by the wonderful Adam Martin from Gaba Podcast. My mum did her first online yoga class, my Dad has been playing virtual Scrabble with his friends, and that’s all on top of the phone calls and video calls that ping around between us all every day.

Yet whilst I sing its praises, the internet also has darker qualities in times like these. There are no ‘ground rules’ for the internet, and social media can start to become a bit of a Wild West where opinions get flung around and judgement passed. Lockdown restrictions seem to change everyday, and you see plenty of neighbourhood vigilantes who take it upon themselves to report and criticise other people for the rules that they break, people in government for the rules that they make, shoppers for the food that they take. I find myself engaging in this circle of judgement too, and yet it goes against the principles of community and solidarity that are needed now more than ever.

Not only does the internet make space for judgement, but for jealousy as well. In presenting selected elements of our lives we can create idealised images of what our lives are really like, and in sharing certain things we can highlight what others don’t have. Sharing photos and stories is a great way of connecting with others, but the flipside of this digital culture addicted to sharing is that we sometimes lose sight of what we have. This week, I’ve taken a bit of a step back from Instagram and Facebook both to focus on my present situation and the immediate world around me, and not to incite jealousy or comparison. I’m interested to see how I find this change.

Unrelated to the current pandemic, we’re incredibly excited to finally have a launch date for Broaden’s upcoming documentary, ‘The Hundred Miler’.

Announcing the release date was in part triggered because we realised that this is a time when people will be at home, available to watch an independent documentary about ultra running. But announcing the launch of The Hundred Miler also highlights another duality: that while there is a global crisis going on which involves a terrifying, easy-to-transmit illness causing an influx of deaths, the ‘normality’ of everyday life is running in parallel. People are still doing homework with their kids, others are watching Netflix before they go to bed and walking their dogs, and George and I are still trying to edit videos and launch Broaden.

And so, now seemed as good a time as any to finally get our first big film out into the world. We’ve created a facebook event to promote the launch on the 11th April, and throughout the runup in the coming three weeks we’ll be releasing snippets of the film too. I’d love for as many of you to join the facebook event and catch the video when it’s out.

Having a creative project like this documentary throughout lockdown has been a lifesaver, as it’s pushed me to move towards the positive side of the dualities presented by coronavirus: trying to ‘do stuff’ rather than getting bored, trying to make something rather than being crippled by anxiety, trying to make the most of the space we have rather than feel trapped in our surroundings, trying to be present rather than fretting about the future.

All that considered, the critical word in the statement above is trying. I’m trying, and not always succeeding, to see the positive side of things. I think one of the reasons it took me a while to finally write this blog post is because I wanted it to come from an authentic place, and at first it felt like a failure that I didn’t have only good things to report. But in processing how I’ve been feeling these past seven days, the most authentic message is that I haven’t been purely positive, and things have been rough, and that that’s okay too.

The duality of life is what gives it character, and I think some of the dualistic qualities of this period of lockdown are what’s making it such a strange thing for us to all grapple with too.

Does any of this make sense? I hope so. I hope I’m not alone in these feelings and I hope that in some way this blog brings us closer together. These are strange and scary times, folks.

Stay safe and stay sane. x