#it took them five adult novel

[soneakyr]

Melting a bit about Avar and Elzar's mentions in each other bio as a lover🫠

[portraitofalinkonfyre]

A Fierce Dillema

Pairing: Fierce Deity x Reader

Warning(s): None, just some introspective fluff and controlled chaos with everyone's favorite deity <3

Masterlist

“(Y/n).”

You awoke to the gentle calling of your name and a firm hand on your shoulder. A groan left you as you tried to turn away, to hide in the downy pillows and scattered sheets of your bed, but the voice was too persistent to ignore. A quick glance at your nightstand revealed that it was four in the morning, which was only cemented by the fact that the sun hadn’t even risen yet. 

“(Y/n),” the voice, oddly familiar, continued to press. “Wake up.”

Wake up, he said. You already had an inkling of who would dare disturb your slumber, and it only became clear when you saw the Fierce Deity’s silver-haired reflection on the glossy surface of your alarm clock. He was wearing his armor and that blade of his was secured to his back, which undoubtedly meant something significant had occurred since you bid him and the other boys goodnight six-ish hours ago. “Oh my god, what happened?” 

There was a slight pause. You could practically feel the tension through the calloused hand on your bare shoulder and sincerely hoped he hadn’t gone out and killed someone… or set the kitchen on fire. Again. You weren’t sure which was worse, because at least a body was easy enough to hide when you had nine heroes at your disposal. 

“Can humans consume deer meat?”

What? 

You had to physically turn around to convey the bafflement you were currently feeling. Ever the gentleman, he removed his hand and took a respectful step backward. Now facing each other, you looked him straight in the eye and asked: “Is there a deer in my kitchen?”

“Yes.”

“...Is it for breakfast?”

“Yes.”

…Okay. You were an adult, so you would handle it as such. It was a minor miracle that he had the foresight to talk to you before attempting to use your stove (you hoped). Besides, you did say that you were going to teach the boys about your world until another portal showed up to dump them somewhere else, and Fierce would be no exception. “I’ll be down in five. Do I need to watch meat-cleaning videos or did you put that sword to use?”

The Fierce Deity, destroyer of gods and civilizations alike, looked almost offended by your assumption of his sword usage. You watched, amused, as his voice took on a scolding tone. “I would never, it is much too large for such a task.”

“Whatever you say, buddy,” you slid out of bed with the grace of a waterlogged snail, arranging the blankets in some haphazard semblance of a made bed. Fierce quickly made himself scarce, leaving you alone with your thoughts. 

Your relationship with the deity was an… unusual one. You had been cleaning when you accidentally knocked over Time’s precariously placed traveling pack, only for a vaguely-humanoid mask to fall out. You proceeded to snatch it up and the shit that followed was wild enough to be the star of a bestselling novel on Booktok, because there was no other way to describe it when a seven-foot, fully-armored man materialized two feet away wielding a sword that was as long as you were tall. Chaos had ensued and a fight nearly broke out between the newcomer and Sky, of all people, in your kitchen until Time managed to calm everyone down. From then on, he had simply coexisted in your home, though there were occasionally spats between him and the other boys. Traditionally, Time was the one to break it up when it happened, but you also discovered you yourself had some sway to him when you screamed loud enough. 

Recently, however, Fierce had become unusually devoted to helping out around the house, going so far as to attempt to duel Wild for the right to cook dinner. It had taken a full minute of scolding to get him to pipe down and watch Family Feud with the others, though you got the vague sense that he was pouting as he watched you from the couch. His behavior only ramped up when your boss blessed (cursed) you with more hours at work and you returned home to learn that, in the span of five hours, he had managed to not only break your vacuum cleaner, but nearly maim the mailman for “invading your territory”, to which you informed him that things were drastically different in your world and promptly bought a “guard dog on duty” sign to hang on your mailbox. 

A quiet creak of the floorboards outside reminded you of who you were keeping waiting. With a muffled curse, you threw on a half-decent shirt, leaving your axalotle pj pants right where they were, and dashed outside to meet the deity. He was leaning against your wall, arms crossed over that mouthwateringly muscled chest (you had eyes), but seemed to snap to attention when you barreled into the hallway. “Let’s cook this bitch!”

And so you did. While the gorey mess practically dripping from your island wasn’t particularly enthusing, you sucked it up and retrieved a pan, turning the stove to the max. A bit of oil later and you had a butchered flank roasting on the front burner, while a large pot filled with bones boiled away. Fierce was very considerate of your lack of knowledge on this sort of thing, quietly handing you the finished cuts when you requested them. He hardly spoke, choosing to listen as you prattled on about nothing in particular. Within the hour, you had an entire pile of roasted meat on a serving plate, and several members of the chain had begun to trickle in, likely drawn by the delicious scent of food. It was only when everyone was downstairs did you notice that he had disappeared. Despite the minor fuss the younger boys raised, you grabbed some food and went to find him. 

It was on the woodpile in the very corner of your property where you tracked him to. Even with his impressive bulk, there was still space to sit on the stacked logs, so you plopped down happily. Fierce looked at you with a surprised expression, but said nothing. So you did instead, offering him the plate. “I hope you know I’m not going to let you run off without eating after all you did.”

He took the plate. “It is nothing.”

You shrugged and began peeling the orange you snagged earlier. “Maybe to you, but not to me. You gave us a break and I’m grateful.”

“I stole sleep from you.”

“And?” You honestly had no idea why he thought you cared about that. Sure, waking up early sucked sometimes, but you weren’t made of glass. You popped an orange slice into your mouth. “I’m an adult.”

There was silence, but it wasn’t as uncomfortable as one would think. The sun had long since risen, bathing you in warm golden hues that not even the gentle breeze could chill. It didn’t even dawn on you how strange you must have looked–sitting next to an actual deity while dressed in a stained t-shirt and printed animal pants–or how unusual your life had become. 

“I have a question,” said the deity. You listened intently before answering–it wasn’t often that he initiated conversation and you didn’t want to spoil it. 

“...I have an answer.”

If you had looked closely, you would have seen the subtle quirk of his usually flat mouth before his expression reformed to something more solemn. You wondered if you should have mentally prepared for this conversation. “You do not fear me… why?”

You blinked, trying to process what had just been said to you. “Excuse me?”

As if sensing your bafflement, the Fierce Deity elaborated: “I could end your existence with a sweep of my sword. Thousands have recognized this, but you either deny or remain oblivious to it.”

Ouch? You knew little of his backstory beyond being imprisoned in a mask for countless years by someone named Hylia for–... well, you don’t think he had informed you, but it was far from warranting fear. If he had wanted to hurt you he would have done so already. You were honestly a bit offended he thought so little of you. “Is that all you think there is to it? I’ve told you before and I’ll say it again: you’ve done nothing to warrant my fear, so I don’t know where you’re getting this from,” you paused, realizing how harsh you sounded. “...Sorry, I just… I don’t see you that way.”

“Then how do you see me?” asked the deity, and you were caught off guard by the genuine curiosity in his pupil-less eyes. Was he… self conscious? It was a laughable thought, that the Fierce Deity was capable of such an emotion, but it was the only one that made sense in this dance of conversation. 

That begs the question… how did you see him? ‘A person’ was your first thought, but it was what anyone would say. An acquaintance? Yes, but then it made your relationship seem almost transactional, which was not what you were aiming to convey. He was clearly looking for reassurance beneath that stoic facade and you knew an opportunity like this wouldn’t come again. 

“A friend,” the words rolled off your tongue before you could stop them, but what could you do besides continue? “You’re my friend.”

It was simple, really, though that didn’t stop him from looking completely and utterly baffled. “You consider me… a friend?”

Why did it sound like such an affront when he said it like that? Your orange was long gone, but it didn’t stop you from fiddling with the peel in your hands. “I wouldn’t have said it if I didn’t mean it,” you responded honestly, because, really, you wouldn’t have. “You don’t sound like you have many friends.”

There was a sort of bitter melancholy in his tone that you knew all too well. “I have none.”

You grinned and reached up to pat his shoulder, emboldened by the rising light and your own sense of duty. “Until now.”

For the first time in forever, The Fierce Deity, vanquisher of worlds and gods alike, smiled. Truly smiled. You could have sworn his porcelain cheeks seemed a little less stark when he took your hand, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of it like in the fantasy novels you read as a child. Then, before you could choke out a flustered response, he leaned close and said. “I vow to not disappoint you.”

It was almost impressive how quickly you recovered from the shock of his actions. With a small laugh, you laid your hand on his shoulder, warm as an inferno, and whispered. “You could never.”

Is this the same AU as Knightmare In Toronto? Who knows!

[virtualtadpole]

Behind the blue shorts: How an all-boys Catholic school sparked the origination of Thai BL

(Cross-post from Reddit)

One evening this past July in Bangkok's long-time youth hangout of Siam Square, a crowd was gathering in the street, around an area set aside for busking musicians. The mostly young-adult female audience politely applauded as several high school bands took turns performing, but they were actually waiting for a different act. After some time, the crowd began to stir as members caught sight of some two dozen teenaged boys, all in a uniform of white shirts and bright royal blue shorts, headed towards the gathering. As they filed out onto the makeshift stage area, the boys were loudly greeted with passionate, enthusiastic screams, all too characteristic of fans cheering on their idols.

But these boys weren't actual idols - not yet, at least. They were all brand new actors, yet to appear on screen anywhere. They were the cast of��Love Sick 2024, an upcoming remake of the pioneering Thai BL series whose tenth anniversary they were celebrating that day, in one of their first public appearances.

Why, then, would such inexperienced newcomers inspire such fervent devotion?

The Love Sick 2024 boys (and three girls) with their audience (Tia51)

Well, for starters, the original Love Sick series is a quintessential classic of Thai BL, arguably the one pivotal work that kick-started the entire TV genre - which in the decade since has developed into an industry worth multi-millions and recognized as a major cultural export. It still holds a place close to many long-time fans' hearts, and BL, like other phenomena of fandom culture, has been known to elicit very enthusiastic emotional responses from followers.

But the scenes witnessed with Love Sick 2024's actors are actually quite reminiscent of those previously seen during the original's release, when BL series didn't yet even exist as a category. Surely, there must be something else underlying this series' - and its actors' - popularity.

Let's take a closer look.

Love Sick's real-life inspiration

In chapter 21 of the original Love Sick novel, Noh, having taken delivery of the music club's new set of drums and overseen band practice for the evening, spends some time sitting around on the stands along the sports pitch next to the F. Building, wondering how he's going to pay for them. It's not long before Earn shows up to rescue him from his financial troubles, but let's pay attention to the location.

The F. Building Noh mentioned is an actual place - F. Hilaire Building at Assumption College (AC) in Bangkok. It is named after Frère (Brother) Hilaire, one of five French missionary teachers of the Catholic Brothers of St. Gabriel who arrived in Siam in 1901.

In the late 19th century, Siam (Thailand's historical name) was rapidly modernizing in response to colonial pressures. American Protestant and French Roman Catholic missionaries played a large role introducing technological and medical advances, and also established some of the first schools in the country as the royal government introduced reforms to formalize the education system. Father Émile August Colombet, the head priest of what was then Assumption Church, founded Assumption College as a school for boys in 1885, and after a decade of growth, the Brothers were invited to help run the school. A convent school for girls, run by the Sisters of St. Paul of Chartres, was established next door soon after.

While the early government schools mostly served the aristocracy, the missionary schools catered more to the general populace, especially the minority ethnic groups who also formed the majority of their congregations. However, while they are remembered today for their legacy of modernization, the missionaries had relatively little success proselytizing, and the large majority of their students remained Buddhist.

Over time, these schools expanded and grew. The St. Gabriel's Foundation now operates over a dozen schools, as well as a university, and Assumption College is regarded as one of the most elite private schools in the country. Its lengthy list of famous alumni includes names from several of Thailand's biggest business families, as well as major political figures, demonstrating its historic stature and the strength of its alumni network. Today, the stereotypical image of its students is of those coming from wealthy or upper middle-class families of Chinese descent, and hefty donations are the norm for families looking to secure placement for their sons.

AC student Keen (Only Boo!) giving a presentation in 2022 on his team's experience joining a NASA-sponsored CanSat (miniature suborbital satellite) competition. It's not like every school has an aerospace program. (Assumption College, via Workpoint Today)

Brother Hilaire, barely 20 when he arrived in Siam, spent his next 67 years dedicated to the school. He learned Thai well enough to write the foundational Thai textbook series Darunsueksa, which remains in use over a century later. Along with Father Colombet, he is memorialized as one of the school's two most celebrated figures.

Today, the building which bears his name overlooks the school's central courtyard, an assembly ground of red brick facing the apse of Assumption Cathedral, an imposing Romanesque Revival structure nestled in Bangkok's old European district along Charoen Krung Road, the city's first modern paved street. Guests headed to the famous Mandarin Oriental Hotel nearby might catch glimpses through the steel palisade fence of boys in their white-and-blue uniforms playing football in the tiny sports pitch - the very place where Noh and Earn had their conversation in the novel. The stands are no longer there, but were present in 2007 when The Love of Siam was filmed at the school. Also appearing in the film, and the site of Noh's classes in the novel, is the 13-storey school building which now towers over the cathedral in order to accommodate its secondary student body of some 2,500 within the limited historic space. (The primary section had been split to a different campus in 1966.)

The F. Hilaire Building clock, and Kao Jirayu as young Tong in the sports pitch, seen in The Love of Siam (Sahamongkolfilm International)

A nativity play right in front of the cathedral would be epic. However, this is artistic licence, as the school's primary section lies elsewhere. This area is now the red brick courtyard; Noh actually mentions in the novel that the school was undergoing a lot of landscaping projects. (Sahamongkolfilm International)

The Love of Siam may have been one of the first few instances where the wider public got to actually see what things looked like inside the school. Although it was only standing in as a location for the fictional St. Nicholas School, there was something about seeing students in their sea of blue uniform shorts that tickled the imagination. Such was the effect that when Love Sick began serializing as a web novel on Dek-D.com a year later, the Thai subtitle, usually translated as The Chaotic Lives of Blue Shorts Guys, undoubtedly helped fuel its popularity.

But what's so special about these blue shorts anyway?

This might come as a surprise to international viewers who've only primarily seen Thailand through its TV series, where they tend to be over-represented, but school uniforms with blue shorts are actually rather uncommon in real life. Let's look back again to Brother Hilaire's time, to find out more about their origins.

A history of the blue shorts

In the early days of formal education, most schools did not have defined uniforms, and AC students wore a varied assortment of costumes according to their ethnic background. The school first introduced a uniform in 1933, consisting of a white standing-collar jacket with metal buttons bearing the school insignia, blue shorts, a white pith helmet, white socks, and black leather shoes (though the helmet, socks and shoes remained optional). This was similar to a form already used by some royally affiliated schools since the 1910s,* though their shorts were navy or black. The reason AC opted for blue shorts is not recorded, though some writers have postulated that it may have been to reflect the common colour of the raj pattern costume, the formal dress of the time.

A class of AC students, with their teachers, in the 1940s. It's unclear whether the shorts were the school's original blue, or khaki green in accordance with the 1939 law. (Assumption Association, via The Cloud)

The first piece of legislation governing school uniforms came out in 1939 under the Fascist-leaning regime of Prime Minister Plaek Pibulsonggram. Male students in government schools were assigned a khaki green military-style uniform to match that of the government's Yuwachon Thahan military youth movement. Some AC students also joined the movement, though those who didn't continued to wear the white uniform, creating an interesting contrast which we'll come back to later. In 1943, at the height of World War II in Southeast Asia, a new law extended the khaki green uniform to all schools, but it's unclear whether it ever took effect as Pibulsonggram was ousted the following year and the Yuwachon movement was dissolved after the war's end.

In 1949, the old regulation was scrapped and replaced with a new one, which codified school uniforms to the almost exact same appearance we see today: for boys, a white shirt, shorts, a belt, socks, and shoes. But the shorts were to be khaki for all schools, except those who requested otherwise to the Ministry of Education. Assumption, together with its sister Gabrielite schools, were among the first to register exemptions and became the only schools with blue shorts for their uniforms for several years.

In 1961, the national regulation was changed again to allow schools to choose between khaki, blue, navy, or black shorts. As time passed, boys' uniforms developed into the convention we see today: black or khaki shorts for government schools, blue or black for private schools. But given their prominence, the image of the all-boys Catholic school has remained one of the strongest associated with the blue shorts uniform.

Not that it mattered much back then, though. In the pre-digital era, people's exposure to different schools was mostly limited to their immediate locality and depictions in the media. While blue-shorts uniforms did feature in some teen movies and sitcoms in the 1990s,† those works didn't really play into the stereotype, and the 1997 financial crisis soon disrupted most media production anyway.

Attracting attention

Then several things happened. The BTS Skytrain opened in 1999, and Bangkok became much smaller overnight - at least for the middle class. Cram schools moved into building spaces in Siam Square left vacant from the recession, and saw an explosion in popularity. School students from all over now flocked to Siam Square in the evenings, and the video classrooms became something of an inter-school melting pot where one could catch sight of all sorts of uniform styles and colours.

And the AC boys, they very much stood out.

It's unclear exactly when things began, but throughout the years, Assumption students had developed a fashion culture of their own. The school is one of a handful that require leather shoes (as opposed to canvas),‡ and its upper-secondary students usually opted for a certain pointy style produced by a couple of old shops on Charoen Krung Road. They would also have their shorts tailor-modified to be very short - typically 15 inches or less, while uniforms coming out of the factory are usually 18 inches at the shortest for high-schooler sizes - and wear them with waists pulled very low. This was despite the rule book stating, like any other school's, that shorts should reach no more than 5 centimetres above the knee. It's actually a common refrain of experiences retold by AC students and alumni that they'd get into trouble for their shorts and shoes whenever the disciplinarian teacher would inspect their uniforms. But it was also part of the challenge, to stay on top of the fashion of their peers and at the same time get away with it.

This fashion only added to the fact that those vivid blue shorts are very visible, like, even from 100 metres away. So, coupled with the stereotype of them being rich kids with likely above-average attractiveness, these AC boys' uniforms easily caught attention, whether they were entering late into a cram school classroom or queuing for the train at the BTS's central interchange at Siam Station during rush hour.

This group strolling down the streets of Siam Square would surely draw plenty of eyes in real life. (Sahamongkolfilm International)

The turn of the 21st century also saw the spread of internet access, and with the early web came the proliferation of online discussion forums, both smaller ones serving specific groups like schools and larger public communities like the youth-oriented Dek-D. Suddenly, it became possible to peak into some of the conversations kids elsewhere were having and share in the knowledge of their hijinks at school. This, in some ways, helped fuel the fantasy of this exclusive boys' world, filled with good-looking guys in revealing shorts who weren't averse to having physical contact with each other.

The online forums also gave birth to web fiction, which soon expanded to include the emerging Y (BL) genre. Naturally, these trends eventually converged to give us plenty of Y fiction set in all-boys schools. But the epitome of these wouldn't arrive until after The Love of Siam hit screens in 2007.

The Love of Siam was probably the first major work in a decade to prominently feature the blue shorts uniform,§ and this time it was actually used to highlight the Catholic boys' school setting, employing AC itself as the location. Though it appeared only in a few short glimpses, they were powerful images that further inspired fascination with the real-life school.

It might be because it's accurate, or because the film has completely coloured viewer's perceptions, but this scene is exactly how one would imagine things to be like in those Catholic boys' schools. (Sahamongkolfilm International)

Then in 2008, Love Sick quietly began serializing on Dek-D's writers' section. The story's premise was simple, but it so effectively tapped into this collective fascination and quickly rose up the site's readership charts. Its popularity came no doubt thanks to author Indrytime's extremely lively and enjoyable writing of Noh, who narrates the story throughout. But a large part of the appeal is also attributable to the lifelike portrayal of his school life, with plenty of references to actual locations both within the school and outside - including the convent school next door and the numerous shops of Siam Square. The novel also name-dropped some of the school's actual teachers who, in Catholic school fashion, are addressed as Miss and Master, and Noh even mentions specific happenings at AC, like the new belt buckles that had been added to the school uniform for younger students that year. The only thing not mentioned was the name of the school, which was intentionally left blank. So close did the story feel to real life that the author had to emphasize its fictional nature when people started speculating about the real identities of Punn‖ and Noh and tried to identify them with actual AC students.

But the most significant reference to real life in Love Sick by far must be its descriptions of what is clearly meant to be the Jaturamitr football competition - a biennial event between Thailand's four oldest boys' schools: Assumption College, its Protestant counterpart Bangkok Christian College (BCC), and the royally founded government schools Suankularb Wittayalai (SK) and Debsirin (DS). The tradition is a HUGE part of school life at these four schools, which pretty much share this culture of intense collective institutional pride.

These boys and their ball game

It's kind of hard to explain all that the competition entails, but the football is just a small part of it. This YouTube video looking at the BCC side makes for a nice intro.¶ There are parades, mascots, Thai-style cheerleading (featuring not acrobatics, but synchronized arm movements), and most notably, the spectacular card stunt displays, which involve the entire student body from the lower-secondary years. The students will spend months practising to perfect their card flips, under the direction of the cheering president. Sounds familiar? That's Earn's position in Love Sick.

Fourwheels (Oxygen, Nitiman, La Pluie), wearing the cheering crew overalls that Noh dreams of, addressing the AC crowd in 2017 (AC Ed Tech)

Beam Boonyakorn (Make It Right) as AC's eagle mascot, though it's often teased for looking more like a chicken, also in 2017 (TTaewTaew Twitter)

The card stunt tradition actually originated at AC in 1942, from the aforementioned contrast between the military youth and regular uniforms. A teacher came up with the idea of having the differently dressed students arrange to form the school initials on the stands. This eventually developed into the elaborate displays done today, which use coloured card booklets to create pixels that together form a detailed aggregate image. Crowds of 1,250 from each school, seated opposite the paying audience, are needed to perform these.

Oat Tharathorn (Fourever You) in the card-stunt-performing audience in 2014; note the plates of colour card booklets set on the racks in front of them. (oattrt Instagram)

Such plates appeared in Love Sick 2024's episode 4 behind-the-scenes clip, but didn't show up in the actual episode. They later appeared in episode 5. (Tia51)

Regular fixtures among these displays include school logos, the royal family, and sponsors. There are also have these coordinated sequences with portraits of students and alumni greeting the crowd, which may feature some familiar faces.

A sponsor ad for Est gives way to AC student Chimon greeting the audience in 2017. (AC Ed Tech)

Alumni PP Krit (AC), Ice Natara (DS), Nonkul (BCC), and Sky Wongravee (SK) welcoming the audience, 2019 (AC Ed Tech)

GMMTV's Marc (AC) and Ford (SK) from the same sequence in 2019; Inn (BCC) from before 2014; AC alum Net Siraphop in 2023 (AC Ed Tech; Suankularb Photo Club; inpitar Instagram)

This attention to popular students didn't exist during novel Noh's time, though. Back then, few people followed the event apart from the schools' students and alumni, and football people scouting for young talent. But the 2010s' "cute boy" craze brought a sharp rise in attention from the sao-Y and cute-boy-following crowds, who flocked to the matches, some equipped with huge telephoto lenses to capture not the football action but cute guys in the audience.

BCC alumnus Inn Sarin photographed in the audience in 2014. Photos of him from the event were virally shared and boosted his following and "cute boy" stature. (inpitar Instagram)

BCC cheerleaders Winny Thanawin (2017) and Ping Krittanun (2019) (BCC Jaturamitr)

The origination of Thai BL

In some ways, the Love Sick novel helped lay the foundations for the phenomenon. It gave readers this imaginary connection to the school, which drove interest in seeing what its real-life students shared on social media, especially as Instagram exploded in popularity around 2012. And of course, attractive boys in revealing uniform shorts was already a winning combination in itself (and the fashion soon spread to other schools).

So it's appropriately fitting that things would come full circle with the 2013 announcement of Love Sick The Series, which generated huge amounts of engagement as fans recalled their impressions of the characters and shared pictures of real-life AC students whom they saw as the perfect Punn and Noh.

As it turned out, recent AC graduate White was cast as Punn, and several other AC boys were also chosen for the many supporting characters. Fans readily took to following these budding actors from the moment they were announced, gathering to meet them after acting classes and supporting them through to the last post-series events. It was a revelation in how dedicated such a fandom could be, without seeing even a second of these actors' work.

For the production, though, it could hardly be expected that explicit reference to the real-life school would be allowed, so they named the school Friday College in the series. (Which kind of bugs me. Couldn't they have at least come up with a vaguely Catholic-sounding name? Anyway, they developed it into a brand and it's stuck now.) They did model the school emblem and uniform exactly after AC's (in its 2008 form, before the new belt buckle), and the same uniform was featured in Thank God It's Friday, a 2019 spin-off set in the same universe. However, the school emblem was redesigned for the 2024 Love Sick remake, maybe because the resemblance now felt too close for comfort. (Another detail that bugs me is how the 2014 series had four-digit student IDs, while the 2024 has six. Most real-life schools have five digits!)

While it would have been a dream come true to see the actual original locations in the series adaptation (even if unnamed), this was not to happen. In fact, unlike its sister school Assumption College Thonburi, which served as the location for Hormones and numerous other works, AC seems to no longer be keen on allowing access as a filming location, and hasn't been spotted in anything since The Love of Siam.

Anyway, Love Sick's broadcast was a turning point in several ways. Of course, it most importantly kickstarted the Thai BL industry,** but this also led to a shift in Y culture where shippers turned their focus from real people to actor pairs from series. "Cute boys" from social media were now regularly tapped to join the many budding modelling agencies, who would try to push them as actors and influencers, and AC students attracted particular attention. Make It Right (2016)'s Peak, Ohm and Beam, for example, were all scouted from the school.

AC students Peak, Ohm and Beam, taken by a fan account in 2016. (allaboutpeak Twitter)

The boys made use of their newfound cult. Popular AC students were tapped to promote the school's annual Christmas Fair, which drew an influx of visitors from their followers, who happily contributed to their fundraising efforts. This was much changed from Noh's time in the novel, when the fair was still pretty much an internal event for students and their immediate friends and family.

Turbo (Love Stage!!) promoting merch for AC's 2015 Christmas Fair (turbotb Instagram)

However, this trend, as with the cute boy craze itself, seems to have largely petered out, especially as life was disrupted by the COVID pandemic and the 2020 protests brought about sharp changes in ideology among young people. Another victim of this has been the Jaturamitr competition, which was postponed for two years before taking place again in 2023.†† But it then became the topic of a huge online drama over the compulsory nature of attendance for the card stunt performances (which not everyone willingly enjoyed), and the negative public attention soured the experience for a lot of the students.

These new concerns seem to have influenced Love Sick's 2024 remake. In the novel, during preparation for the football competition, Noh talks about how hard the marching band was practising, and how he and the band leaders felt the need to push them to perfection, in order to uphold the school's reputation. There's a clear institutional pride in the way he says, "I'm sure the young ones understand. (Or if they don't now, they will in a few years.)"

This stands in sharp contrast to Earn's stance in Love Sick 2024, where he says in episode 4, "If the formation fails, the school’s reputation will just take a hit. But the school doesn’t have feelings, does it? It is they (the young ones) who have feelings."

We'll find out in a couple of hours how else they're updating the depiction of the competition, which was one of the highlight scenes in the novel thanks to how detailed it was with insider info of the behind-the-scenes workings at the Suphachalasai National Stadium in real life. It's an unfortunate fact, though, that it's near impossible that any TV production with a normal budget would even come close to the spectacle of the actual event, with its crowds in the tens of thousands. But let's see how creative the production crew can be.

After all, it's the emotional threads that make the real highlight of the story, isn't it?

Footnotes

* These schools had been set up after the English public school model by King Vajiravudh, who himself was educated in England. Vajiravudh College still uses it as its ceremonial uniform.

† One of these was I Miss You 2 (1996), which was filmed at Montfort College in Chiang Mai, another Gabrielite school. Incidentally, The Love of Siam director Madeaw Chookiat was a student there and became an extra in the film, an experience which inspired him to go into filmmaking. He would later base the Nay-Beam segment of Home (2012, one of the most significant mainstream proto-BL works) at the school.

‡ Most other schools allow both, and their students usually prefer canvas shoes. Nanyang, with its iconic green soles, has long been the most popular brand.

§ Actually there's at least Yong Songyos's Dorm (2006), set at his alma mater Assumption College Sriracha, but it's a horror focusing more on the boarding-school aspect. Yong also created a short film dedicated to the school in 2015, starring four Hormones Next Gen actors (no English subs, but there are hardcoded Thai captions that maybe a tool can translate).

‖ Sorry, but I just can't accept the spelling Phun, as it's plain incorrect. The /p/ and /ph/ are supposed to represent different sounds in Thai, but most Thai people don't understand the system as it's not taught in schools.

¶ As an expat, the video creator misses the meanings of some of the things that happen in the video. The yellow chicken is a reference to a Facebook satirist who's said to bring bad luck to sports teams, while the no-banana sign is a response to the angry chant the BCC side was yelling. It's an expletive that rhymes with the word for banana in Thai.

** Isn't it ironic that a genre revolving around a topic so controversial with the Church should be inspired by a Catholic school? But then, as director Madeaw demonstrated in The Love of Siam, religious conflict has always played an important role in driving social issues, while in the case of Love Sick, it's not actually relevant at all.

†† Yet another victim is the Chula-Thammasat Traditional Football Match, a competition between Thailand's two oldest universities which features similar elements of parades, cheerleading and card stunts. It hasn't been properly held since 2020, and when a substitute event was held in 2024, a huge online drama erupted over the student body's decision to alter certain elements.

[whetstonefires]

Do you have any opinions on Scholomance?

I do! I like it a lot. I really enjoyed all three books, blitzed through them easily and was much more excited to see how the plots unfolded than I'm used to these days, as a jaded adult, and I also really appreciated them as works of craft.

Especially the first one, I spent the whole time being all 'wow!' at how simple it was. So easy to read, but no waste. You really need to know what you're doing, to get that kind of pared-down elegance of form to work and still fit so much content in.

Like these are dense, there's a fantastic stylistic minimalism that allows El's character all the space it needs to breathe by making absolutely every other thing and person in the whole novel also do character work for her, which is exactly where the first person voice shines.

Also great use of character perspective to make the pacing feel really natural, so the fact that the first book takes three weeks, the second book takes one year, and the third book is like. Five or so incredibly stressful days spread out over the course of a few weeks? Doesn't feel imbalanced.

I actually got distracted from the story a few times by noticing the strength of Novik's technique. 😂 This is a me problem, in itself it's the opposite of distracting. Very low-profile.

I think the Scholomance is a great example of how far you can go in specfic when you aren't cringing from the label 'derivative,' because the Scholomance books feel very fresh ad clean specifically because nothing in them is concerned with standing out as 'original,' whatever that's supposed to mean, only with being well-executed and suitable to its task.

Hm, maybe that's where Liesel was born, the intersection of the efficient narrative style and the vast proportion of the story that concerns the maximization of utility and the instrumentalization of persons by themselves and others, and the forces that incentivize these behaviors. Or maybe she's just the narrative counterweight to Orion 'Head Empty' Lake lmao. How's that for a principle of balance, Galadriel?

I really did enjoy how beautifully it was laid out, over and over, in dozens of shades of humanity, how no matter where you go in an exploitative system almost everyone is being driven by the same survival instincts.

Because I don't think I've ever seen made so cleanly clear why you just can't expect any person or small group of people, no matter their level of goodwill or status, to unmake one of these systems from the inside; how it's not a matter of people being bad but of every single person being very...small.

And then not retreating into the idea of a person who is Big coming and breaking the cruel system from the outside as some kind of panacea, because 1) that is terrible, even if it's necessary and done in the best way possible and 2) that's not a sustainable answer to anything. Getting a balance between the protagonist being able to effect change and not subscribing to the great man theory of history can be really tricky!

Also did I mention, I love El, and I love most of the cast, even the dreadful ones. How am I going around with this many feelings about Li Shanfeng who doesn't appear until the actual climax?

The romance murdered me a bit, but it took up no more space than it absolutely needed to do its job, and I respect that. Also I appreciated Orion as a love interest; Novik has a slight record at this point of a version of that style of male love interest who's like a caricature of Mr. Darcy but old, which was shaping up to be my least favorite thing about her body of work.

...Orion is kind of like if you took the human king from Spinning Silver and gave him an alignment flip come to think of it, so he's not coming out of nowhere. Lmao.

Which reminds me (re: romance character typing) I've heard Novik didn't want it to be known she was astolat, which this series has renewed my sympathies if so. Because if I were a published novelist I wouldn't want people going 'you know, that resolution was really emotionally satisfying! reminds me of that fic she wrote where optimus prime and megatron get stuck in a hole underground and hatefuck about it.'

I don't even like Transformers. That fic almost made me cry. Actually I suspect it reads better if you don't like Transformers because I'm sure it does not give a shit about canon.

Anyway, whoever pointed out that one of the things El has going on is she's Enoby (and we're going to sit down and explore what the true reason to put your middle finger up at preps is, and what are some constructive ways to channel that socioeconomic wrath, and what it means that there is no ethical consumption under capitalism) was right and I'm not entirely over that either.

Fucking love El's mom as a character. Spectacular level of parent relevance and usefulness. A+.

Aadhya and Liu are also characters who fucking delivered.

Re: minimalism though, I laughed at the start of The Golden Enclaves when I realized that none of the enclaver characters who'd gotten development in the the first two books were from London, the enclave El was theoretically shooting for when we met her.

[beautiful-songbird]

Zee's 2024 Reads

Stats:

Books read ˋ°•*⁀➷ 51

Books DNFed ˋ°•*⁀➷ 8

Five-star reads ˋ°•*⁀➷ 35

Re-reads ˋ°•*⁀➷ 11

Most read author ˋ°•*⁀➷ Rick Riordan (14 novels)

Note: ☆ counts as a half star, since there isn’t a half star emoji

This was certainly a year of reading long book series and my DNFing any book that wasn't my speed immediately (sorry?)

Also if these reviews are short it's because I wrote 70% of them in one day, sorry.

↳ January (4)

Fourth Wing (reread) - Rebecca Yarros

January 11th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I anticipated this reread for a while before I finally got around to it, and it was soooo worth the wait. This book was so immersive and I absolutely love being in the world (as I'm sure you all know by now) and I even ended up giving the book 5 stars on this third read of it. Xaden was so intimidating when I removed myself from the anticipation of him being the love interest, and that was fun.

The Lightning Thief - Rick Riordan

January 21st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was so much fun. Percy’s inner monologue took a little bit of time to get used to since I’m used to reading books from the perspective of teenage girls and adult women, but he was a very fun character to follow. I’ve always loved Greek Mythology, so getting to read a modern book with the gods was very intriguing. I thought the world was very immersive and the characters were fun. I can’t wait to see how this story progresses over the next few books.

The Sea of Monsters - Rick Riordan

January 24th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

If you’d told me I was going to be eating up a middle grade book series this year, I’d have laughed in your face. This book was so good. Tyson has to be my favorite character in the whole series so far. He’s so adorable 😭

This book, like most middle grade books, was slightly predictable. It doesn’t help that I’ve gotten probably at least one spoiler for each book, but that didn’t make the reading of it any less fun. Percy and Annabeth’s relationship is progressing a bit, and I love to see it. They trust each other a bit more in each book.

Destroy the Day - Brigid Kenmerer

January 29th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was everything and more I wanted out of a final book in this series…I mean…COME ON! For one, I LOVE Harristan, and we got a whole lot more of him in this book. I was eating those chapters UP!

Corrick and Lochlan had a lovely bonding in this book after being at odds with each other for the entire series, so that was nice! I really appreciate that they were able to get over their hatred for each other eventually and become really close friends 😭 the last chapter with them at the end is so near and dear to my heart, you don’t understand.

I won’t get into the nitty gritty of this plot because that was on the back burner in this story. What I LOVED about this book was the romance Harristan got. He and the person he ended up with were two characters I had been hoping something would happen between for a while and then out of nowhere - it happened! I squealed when they kissed for the first time. I’m so glad they got their happily ever after because that is truly all I ever wanted for them <3

January technically has 6 reads because I read two of my mom's books, but she's not published, so they're not on this list.

↳ February (9)

The Night Circus - Erin Morgenstern

February 1st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️, DNF

Ok so this book was like…SUPER disappointing? I read it expecting to love it because it just had that kind of vibe…and it was just so interesting. For one, the book had no actual chapters but instead section headings? There were no chapter numbers. Very odd. Also, the characters felt so distant. I think I read a good 60-70 pages of this book and I felt absolutely NOTHING for our two main characters. Very sad, as I had really expected to enjoy this book a lot.

The Cruel Prince (reread) - Holly Black

February 11th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This is my second full read of this book, and I have to say, this book is a lot better read as a politically-based plot instead of a romance. Don’t get me wrong, I love the way the romance builds in this series, but it’s a lot easier to enjoy when you’re not anticipating anything happening in Jude’s love life. I read this book originally after hearing rave reviews about the romance in it, and while I’ll say those reviews were not wrong, it was frustrating to read almost the entire book with absolutely no romance whatsoever.

There is so much to love about this book. Jude is a very compelling main character, and, despite being a little insane, she’s a very lovable main character. She’s very bold and passionate, but she’s not just a one-dimensional character. It’s very easy to get into her head and understand how her brain works, and seeing the adventures she goes on is thrilling.

There’s not much in the way of major side characters for the first two thirds of this book, and I found that I actually don’t mind it. Jude is a very entertaining and interesting character on her own that she doesn’t really need supporting characters to help carry a scene.

Cardan is not a major character in this book, but I adore him at every turn anyways. Once he stops playing the antagonist, almost every line he delivers is incredible, and I absolutely love the way he speaks. The way that he and Jude banter closer to the end of the book leaves me with anticipation for what’s to come in their romance (even though I’ve already read it!) Their chemistry builds with each scene they share, and I have to say that their relationship is definitely my favorite part of the book.

The Wicked King (reread) - Holly Black

February 12th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was as fun as I remember it being. It begins five months after the events of the last book, and Jude hasn’t found a way to get along with Cardan just yet. Seeing the two of them dance around each other and pretend their chemistry is hatred is uproariously funny, and the way that they speak to each other throughout this book is absolutely lovely to read.

But don’t be fooled, this book is not mostly romance. Jude plays her role as the true ruler of Elfhame, and while doing so, she leaves Cardan out of the loop quite a bit. The two of them fight quite a bit because of this, and while this isn’t the main conflict of the book, it fed into it quite a bit.

The number of parties in this book had me absolutely feral, and I love to see Jude and Cardan dance together. Both times they danced were unlikely circumstances, and the dance they had near the end of the book…ooh. That scene is one of my absolute favorite scenes in this entire series. The way the two of them finally (sort of) let the other in after that scene too? UGH. It makes me go insane.

This book certainly did NOT suffer from middle book syndrome, and after recently reading a book that most definitely did, I am extremely grateful. Honestly, this book might be my favorite of the three, but I’m only about a quarter of the way through Queen of Nothing, so we’ll see how I feel in a few days when I finally get around to finishing it.

The Roommate Pact - Allison Ashley

February 15th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

I’ll be honest, this book was kind of fun trash. Don’t get me wrong, it was a good book, but there was just something about it that gave me the vibe that I was reading book junk food. The characters were fun, the trauma was well-written and well dealt with, and the plot was good and probably realistic for two people in their mid-thirties.

One gripe I had with it was that half the time the characters felt like teenagers, though. If I wanted to read a book about teenagers, I’d read about teenagers. It was very odd to read about an NP and a firefighter and then have them act like 16-year-olds.

Overall, it was a pretty easy read and I had a good time, so I’d say it was worth it. It was the book I read on my Kindle while I was taking baths for this month, so…🤷🏻‍♀️ it was good bath reading or something.

The Titan’s Curse - Rick Riordan

February 17th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was just…fun! I find it interesting that despite this series following a linear and connected storyline, it doesn’t seem to have a distinct vibe. Each book I read in this series is extremely separate from the last in the terms of the feeling the world gives me, and it’s actually quite enjoyable!

This book brought a bunch of new characters into the mix and deepened our understanding of the world and the characters within it, and I really enjoyed that! It was also an extremely easy read after reading YA/NA fantasy for the past few months, so that was really nice. I was a bit horrified to look up the Heroes of Olympus after reading this and realize all of those books are between 500 and 600 pages, but we’ll leave that problem for when we get there.

Kissing Kosher - Jean Meltzer

February 18th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️, DNF

Honestly, this book was a huge disappointment. After how much I loved this author’s other book, The Matzah Ball, I expected to love this one too, but I just didn’t find myself as in love with the characters. It was just kinda…meh.

The Queen of Nothing (reread) - Holly Black

February 19th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was a masterpiece from start to finish. Watching Jude weasel her way back into the kingdom and spy on her enemies was so much fun!

Of course, it wouldn’t be the final book in a fantasy series without a bit more romance. Jude and Cardan finally confessed their feelings to each other, albeit in a bit of a roundabout way at first. The rising romantic tension between the two of them throughout this book was definitely the best part of it. I especially enjoyed watching Jude’s feelings for Cardan snowball as she realized how much she really loved him.

The entire main plot of this book was AMAZING. I really appreciated the way Cardan finally proved himself as king in the latter half of the book, and I loved watching him grow in his confidence over the throne. he and Jude both seemed to grow into their roles quite a bit more in this book as well as proving themselves as spies.

Overall, I don’t really think any review I could write could do this book justice. I think it is probably my favorite book in the entire series, though the second book is a CLOSE second.

The Battle of the Labyrinth - Rick Riordan

February 21st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

SO much happened in this book, and despite the fact that not as much happened plot-wise as I expected, it was a great read. Some of my favorite characters from past books were brought back for this book’s quest, and so much happened between the characters in this book.One thing I was super excited about in this book is that Percy and Annabeth’s relationship is finally going somewhere. I love how slow this slow-burn is, but I can’t wait to see Percy finally realize how he feels about her.

The Last Olympian - Rick Riordan

February 22nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I definitely didn’t read this in one night. I swear. It totally didn’t happe-

This book was a completely different experience from the other four. It was essentially one big battle, and usually I don’t like reading battles, but this one was exciting to read. It brought back ALL the characters, liked or not, and it was so much fun.

We got to meet quite a few of the gods in this book, and that was fun. We also got a Hades cameo, which was awesome after not seeing him for…what…four books? Three? I don’t even remember anymore. We also got a lot more about little Nico, and I love him, so that was very enjoyable for me.

↳ March (7)

The Chalice of the Gods - Rick Riordan

March 5th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I was super excited for this book's release, and I have to say, it kind of let me down. Coming off reading the action-packed original five books, this book felt very low-stakes, and I wasn't really into that. Other than that, this book was really good, though! I loved seeing our original gang again.

The Lost Hero - Rick Riordan

March 9th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was insane. First of all, I love Jason. People dislike him??? Insane. He was definitely my favorite of the three in this book, and I loved to watch them go on a totally new adventure. I especially liked that it took us farther than the original series took us when the characters went on quests. Iconic. Personally, I think this was a great opener to the second series, and I loved this book thoroughly.

A Curse so Dark and Lonely - Brigid Kemmerer

March 10th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

My reading of this book was entirely a result of my enjoyment of Defy the Night, and it did not disappoint. I absolutely loved the worldbuilding here, and it captured the Beauty & the Beast retelling while also putting a completely new spin on it. That being said, I really felt like the characters were flat. The story didn't really make me care for them all that much. The situations they were put in were quite interesting, but they were very uncompelling. (Besides Grey, but he's not in this book enough to save my opinion on the flatness of the characters.)

We Hunt the Flame - Hafsah Faizal

March 12th, (N/A), DNF

This was one of like five books I rented before going to clean out my great-grandparents' house and it was just not very easy to get into. As I didn't understand a lot of the words on the first three pages, I think this book simply wasn't for me. It did seem like a very interesting read based entirely on those three pages alone, but I was too mentally exhausted at the time to put effort into reading.

A Heart So Fierce and Broken - Brigid Kemmerer

March 12th, (N/A), DNF

This is the sequel to A Curse so Dark and Lonely, and I've gotta be honest, she lost me about two chapters in. We follow two characters who weren't even in the last book, and it just felt like I was reading a different series entirely. It might've been a good book, but I really didn't like the fact that the entire book was two points of view we've never seen before.

The Stolen Heir (reread) - Holly Black

March 16th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Oak is an icon, I love the romantic tension, and the book kept you on your toes at all times. Love.

The Prisoner's Throne - Holly Black

March 17th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Ok...this book...I read it mostly for Cardan and Jude's cameos? Yeah, sorry. I love Oak, but Wren was kinda...too much in this book? Still got five stars because Jude and Cardan ate this book up, but yeah.

↳ April (2)

The Son of Neptune - Rick Riordan

April 8th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

The excitement I felt when I opened the book and saw Percy's name at the top of the first chapter is palpable. My babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼. Hazel and Frank were both awesome as the other main characters, and I loved following these characters up the west coast. This book was absolutely jam-packed with action, and the tension as we waited for Percy to get his memories back was also great. I've seen a lot of people complain about the fact that Percy lost his Achilles Heel Curse, and to that I say: ??? what fun is a character who's essentially indestructible??? I digress. I loved this book.

The Mark of Athena - Rick Riordan

April 29th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I don't remember this book. Something about group bonding, and Annabeth judo flips Percy. Ending was absolutely devastating and insane. It was a very good read, don't get me wrong, it's just all blurring together in my head right now.

↳ May (4)

The House of Hades - Rick Riordan

May 1st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

*insert five hour clip of me screaming here* Best book in the series. I don't remember anything but Percabeth but that's enough for me.

The Blood of Olympus - Rick Riordan

May 2nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Bro I don't remember this book either?? Like at all?? Jason gets glasses or something?? No clue. Good read, though.

The Sun and the Star - Rick Riordan

May 4th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

Oh my God 🤩 don't get me started on this book. It had soooooooo much potential, but the random info-dumping about things that were not plot-relevant knocked this book down a whole star for me. Probably the weirdest thing about this book was the assumption that everyone was straight until proven otherwise?? Have we...met the Greek gods? (They're all bi/pan/ace?) I dunno, man. Nico and Will were really cute, so I finished the book for them.

The Tiger at Midnight - Teerdhala Swati

May 24th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

This book was sooooo rich and lovely to read. Both of the main characters are extremely compelling, and they were very fun to follow. Their dynamic is insanely good, and the ending?? Whew. I picked up the sequel to this from the library and then never got around to reading it, so I'm hoping to finish this series in the new year. If you like fantasy based more in south Asia, I would DEFINITELY recommend this.

↳ June (2)

Ace of Shades - Amanda Foody

June 9th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was like if Six of Crows and The Night Circus had a love child, if that makes sense? The main character was both very girly and very smart, which I really appreciated. The world building was very good, and I think I read this whole book in like 3 days? I initially gave this book five stars, but I think considering the actual plot, that's a bit too generous, so I'm bumping it down to a four. I did feel like there were a few too many side characters, so there is that, and the pacing was kind of inconsistent if I recall correctly?

The Darkest Part of the Forest - Holly Black

June 24th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

To be honest, I don't remember why I gave this four stars. In retrospect, I think it was a five star read, but I do remember the end being a little all over the place, so I'll leave it at four. Ben and Hazel are absolutely so much fun in this book, and the romance somehow delivered twice over in a standalone? Holly performing magic tricks as always. The plot twist at the very end had me absolutely GAGGED. It was the craziest plot twist ever, and completely worth the read.

↳ July (5)

The Sword of Summer - Rick Riordan

July 2nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆, DNF

This book was kind of boring, I'm sorry. I read like 150 pages at least and we were still in basically the same place we started in. I was actually pretty disappointed because it seemed like an intriguing read in the first twenty pages.

The Hurricane Wars - Thea Guanzon

July 2nd, (N/A), DNF

I think I read like two pages of this book and then DNFed it? It's only even on my list so I remember I did in fact try reading it. I'm pretty sure they lost me at the nine suns or whatever. I can't wrap my mind around universes that have more than one sun, so I can't commit.

The Thief - Megan Whalen Turner

July 3rd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

aHHHHHHHHHHHHH GEN MY BABY. Um so. Personal call-out post for @joandragon (she will never stop getting called out for recommending this series to me. The worldbuilding. The religion. The characters. Gen's sneaky, bratty brain. I LOVE. I have never been so glad to live post-2022 (so I could read this series as a completed series). If you read nothing else in the new year, read this series.

The Queen of Attolia - Megan Whalen Turner

July 8th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

aHHHHHHHHHHHHH pt. 2. Megan was crazy for this book. It's the best on in the entire series, I can say that. I can't really say much about this book without absolutely spoiling it, so I'll keep my mouth shut. This book is the definition of a book best read with no spoilers.

King of Fools - Amanda Foody

July 18th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆, DNF

The day I'm writing this review is December 16th, and I've had this book open to like page 250 since July. I can't bring myself to finish it. I don't know what happened between books one and two that this one is so much more unreadable, but I went from loving this series to being kinda indifferent to it simply because I couldn't make it through this book. Also, Levi, my guy, find someone to heal your ribs?? I'm sure someone in this world can heal people, and you've been pulling stunts too insane for a man with broken ribs.

↳ August (2)

The Grandest Game - Jennifer Lynn Barnes

August 2nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Ok, I'll admit, this book isn't as good as the original trilogy, but it is still really good. I love how Jennifer weaves soo much backstory into her books about escape rooms?? The setting for this book was also absolutely immaculate. I wanted to visit so badly.

Apprentice to the Villain - Hannah Nicole Maehrer

August 26th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Ok, I know this series is like if a cliche fairytale for children was a YA novel, but it delivers, ok? These two characters keep giving me all the pining that other books these days are lacking, and I am eating it up. (I am also eating up the fairytale nonsense, let that be heard.) I can't wait for book 3.

↳ September (5)

Iron Flame (reread) - Rebecca Yarros

September 15th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I'm not even gonna talk about this book because the review would be five pages long if I did. I've done so much yapping about this book on my FW sideblog already. I loved it. No notes.

The King of Attolia - Megan Whalen Turner

September 21st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Ohoho. This book is on repeat in my car at this point. It somehow manages to look like it has no plot while having the most plot I've ever seen in a book. I love it. Gen is such a menace. He somehow was still extremely likable even in a narrative where the main character clearly dislikes him, and that is so funny to me. That way that everything mundane and seemingly meaningless comes together in this book is so awesome. You can tell how much work and time the author put into this book especially.

A Conspiracy of Kings - Megan Whalen Turner

September 23rd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆

Sophos is my favorite child. He matured so much. He is so old now (he's like nineteen). This book was a disaster, but I loved it. The first half (?) of the book was really fun to read because you really get to see him turn into a man. He was so much of a whiny child before that, but it was lovely to see him grow up. This book got bumped down half a star because the second part of the book really did not hold as much excitement for me as the first half did, and I also hated the fact that the book switched from first to third person. I understand why it did, but I did not like it. I think about the scene with Gen and Helen all the time, though.

Thick as Thieves - Megan Whalen Turner

September 25th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

(Insert debate over whether or not this book was a romance.) This book was great, and it really expands the worldbuilding since we finally get a lot more background on the Mede Empire and such. I kinda expected to be bored out of my mind reading it because it doesn't really have a central political plot, but I really enjoyed the journey of following our two characters through the country.

Return of the Thief - Megan Whalen Turner

September 29th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Ok remember how I said Queen of Attolia was the best book in this series?? I lied. It's this one. Pheris is literally my baby, okay?? Being serious for a second, I really appreciated the way this book portrayed disability. Because of the framing of Pheris's character, everyone really underestimates him. Being in his head was a lot of fun, especially with the way he thinks. Also...he and Gen are buddies. Trust that I do love this.

↳ October (5)

Moira's Pen - Megan Whalen Turner

October 1st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Considering this is a compilation of stories that range over like 200 years or something, it's hard to give one review for all of them. The last one definitely made me cry or whatever though.

The Thief (reread) - Megan Whalen Turner

October 4th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Yeah I immediately started re-reading the series, what about it?

The Queen of Attolia (reread) - Megan Whalen Turner

October 6th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Ehehehehehehehehehehe

The King of Attolia (reread) - Megan Whalen Turner

October 13th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Oh yeah buddy

The Song of Achilles - Madeline Miller

October 17th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was absolutely tragic. As a retelling of the Iliad, you'd expect that, but I still cried at the ending nonetheless. The storytelling is immaculate, and the progression of the plot is so excessively tragic. The ending was both so so sad and so relieving. Patrochillies makes me so sad. I love the way the author uses the same sort of descriptions that were used in Ancient Greek literature. I know she's gotten into some internet arguments over it, but I personally loved it. Swift-footed Achilles, was, of course, swift-footed.

↳ November (0)

The Song of Achilles sent me into a massive reading slump and I did nothing in November except look at Patrochilles fanart and listen to Epic the Musical (send help).

↳ December (6)

Wrath of the Triple Goddess - Rick Riordan

December 1st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was sooooooooooo much better than #6. The tension actually kept me on the edge of my seat. I loved Percy in this book, and as always, seeing Percabeth made me so happy.

The Queen of Attolia (reread) - Megan Whalen Turner

December 4th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Re-read part three, obviously. I skipped The Thief because...reasons (I was only going to reread QoA and then did not.)

The King of Attolia (reread) - Megan Whalen Turner

December 21st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Obviously I got sucked into this book too. I will be continuing the audiobooks when school is back in session and I'm driving frequently again, stay tuned!

Conceal, Don't Feel - Jen Calonita

December 26th, (N/A), DNF

I picked this book up because I was drawing one day and needed an audiobook that was available immediately and that I knew I wouldn't care if I didn't finish, and that did the trick! It was good enough to keep me occupied but not good enough that I felt obligated to finish it. It was probably around a three star book, given that I'm not really a huge fan of books that take a popular piece of media and rewrite it using exact dialogue from the original media. It was a kids book, and it read so. No issue with that, just not for me.

The Assassin's Curse - Cassandra Rose Clarke

December 28th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Beautiful, short, and to the point. Two characters to follow, three settings total, a compelling plot and some angsty backstories. That's about all you need to know. This book is apparently extremely niche because I could find absolutely nowhere I could read the two companion novellas, but I will be getting my hands on the second book probably about ten hours after I write this review. I absolutely loved the dynamic between the two main characters, and I felt like their characterization was a refreshing change of pace. The main character also has a totally unique voice in the writing, which I loved reading. It made the book feel so much more immersive.

Fawkes - Nadine Brandes

December 29th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book...a masterpiece. For the sake of mystery, I'll just tell you this book is loosely based off of a true historical happening in London. The story was absolutely brilliant, and I was super excited to read a modern fantasy book that was written from the main guy's perspective. You don't get that very often, and Thomas is a lovely character to follow! I read this entire book in a day, if the dates between this book and the last one didn't make that clear. I cried reading the last chapter of this book. It was deeply touching and wholly sad, but the book had a good ending, don't worry! Absolutely love Emma. She's my baby.

Hi, main account! You guys get the reading wrap-up this year because this is finally a multi-fandom blog and you guys actually care about what I'm reading!

All right so I lied in last year's post when I said I wouldn't be doing another yearly wrap-up. The monthly wrap-ups were not something I had time for once the semester got into full swing, so here we are with another long long post.

Next year's looking to start with quite a few re-reads (Six of Crows and Once Upon a Broken Heart, among other things) and at the end of January I'll get my hands on Onyx Storm finally...and then I was told to read the Stormlight Archives? So I'll be writing a post screaming at Joan over that at some point I'm sure.

[lloydfrontera]

i will always find the relationship between javier and the fronteras endlessly fascinating and compelling especially because of the way it's shaped by the required narrative of the original novel versus what we see of them as people through the plot of tged. let me explain.

the thing about javier is that. he's not. a person when we first meet him. he's supposed to be a character. he's just about to go through his tragic backstory so he can then go on to be the hero of 'the knight of blood and iron'. this is what javier is. all his life before that is really nothing more than a footnote. the fronteras themselves are nothing more than extras that die in the very beginning of his story.

and this shapes the way their relationship is meant to be like. because they need to strike the right balance of them being close enough where it's justified for javier to be so loyal to arcos that he refuses to take any master after his death but not so close that javier feels the responsibility or has the authority to take over the estate after their deaths or even remain there at all to help in any way he can. for the sake of the narrative javier isn't allowed to really be a part of the frontera family despite being basically raised by them, because that would interfere with the plot destiny has set up for him.

and if that were it, that would be fine, no one would really pay that much attention to it because why would they. the only things that matters is that they kept javier alive, they were close to him in some regard and now they're dead. that's all that was needed from them for tkobai.

but then. lloyd happens. and he immediately derails the plot and saves the fronteras from death and javier from having to become an errant knight and now everyone is alive and free to continue their own lives and then we get to know arcos and marbella, not as just tragic extras of javier's story but as actual people with their own thoughts and feelings and. what we get to know about them doesn't quite track with their previous actions.

the arcos and marbella we get to know in tged?? they basically adopt lloyd as their son. lloyd. an adult stranger who replaced their son, kept the truth from them for years and who then came back looking nothing like their own kid. and they still love him and accept him as their child. by all accounts they straight up give him their family name, centuries later he's still known as lloyd frontera and nothing else.

this is the kind of people they are. the kind of people who would welcome a stranger into their family because he's kind and good and he's trying his best.

but you mean to tell me that these are the same people who took in a five year old orphan into their home and then just. kept him around. not really being a part of their family. they just raised him for 15 years and then took his oath as a knight and that was it. they don't even call him by his name. he's always 'sir asrahan'.

it doesn't make sense!! that doesn't track with the kind of people they are in tged! except it totally does if you remember they were never meant to be more than just extras. they were never meant to be more than some kind people javier is very distraught to lose but not enough to fall apart for.

that being said. there are a couple explanations that could be given in universe to explain why javier was never made a frontera, despite being taken in by them.

one is that they simply weren't allowed to adopt him. like someone in the replies of this post mentioned, some countries could be pretty strict about who nobles were allowed to adopt. maybe in the magentano kingdom it's the same and the fronteras couldn't legally make javier their child and so could only take him in as a ward or something similar.

or maybe they didn't want to take away one of the very few things javier has left of his family. he was a really small child when his parents were killed, he once mentions he doesn't even really remember his father, just a memory of waiting up for him late at night and that's it. he never really speaks of them nor does he seem to have a deeper connection or longing for them. by the time we meet him, all he has left of them is his name really. maybe when they took him in neither arcos nor marbella wanted to take away one of javier's last remains of his family by making him take their name.

or perhaps they thought adopting javier would cause them more harm than good. after all. they did have a little bastard of a son who took offense at the very existence of javier, despite javier just being *checks notes* a five year old orphan they picked up from the streets so he wouldn't starve or freeze to death. can you imagine the nightmare it would've been if javier had actually been adopted and not just taken in. if og lloyd had not only been forced to share a home but also his own name with him. it wouldn't have been pretty! and the one to pay for it would've certainly been javier! so maybe they thought the risk was simply too high. maybe they thought not giving him their name was a price worth paying to keep the peace at their home.

or maybe they simply didn't think it was their place. maybe they didn't want to make javier uncomfortable or force him into a relationship with them that he didn't want. maybe they wanted to wait until the loss was a little less recent, until the pain had had time to settle into something more manageable and then they just. missed the timing. maybe by the time they realized it was already too late and walls had formed between them that they didn't know how to take down.

in any case i simply don't believe that arcos and marbella are the kind of people to take in a child, raise him his whole life and then just. not feel anything deeper than fondness for him. it doesn't make sense from what we actually get to see of them.

i don't think their relationship with javier is that of parents with a child, but i also don't think it's as distant as what it looks like at first glance. personally i think it must be a mix of,,, habit, formalities and the awkwardness of a missed opportunity hanging between them that doesn't let them be as close as they would otherwise be. like. they all wish they could be something more, they wish the distance was a little shorter, they wish the walls between them could come down but they simply aren't sure how to do that anymore. they don't know if they missed their one chance and this is all that's left.

i don't know!! i just!! it's fascinating to me and i think about it far too much for it to be healthy!! halp!!

[sserpente]

A/N: Requests from four anons and some of my own ideas. I thought in honour of Tom’s Jonathan Pine look making a comeback and the prospect of a Season 2, now is the perfect time for some spicy spy action! Enjoy, everyone!

Words: 2881 Warnings: smut

After Roper’s death, a lot in our own life changed. You moved away from Spain and back to the UK with a fresh start in your suitcase. Your new job in the publishing industry enabled you to meet the authors of the books you were passionate about and you could help discover new talents whose stories would enrich countless readers’ bookshelves.

It was peaceful now. Safer—for at no fault of your own, it hadn’t always been like that. You were young when you fled to sunny Spain to discover yourself, learned Spanish to the point of fluency and started a job at the local library that regularly held readings for both adults and children.

It all went well, for a while. Right until little Danny Roper stepped foot in the library for the first time, accompanied by two brooding bodyguards and a charming British gentleman you, for some reason, instantly mistrusted.

Richard Roper, a wealthy businessman with a mansion all to himself. Perhaps it was unfair to assume he had blood on his hands because of how heavy his wallet was but your instinct had never betrayed you before. Soon, little Danny Roper regularly came to visit the little library, took part in the readings and had you recommend new stories to him, always under the scrutinising eye of his bodyguards or his father.

On the night of Halloween, everything changed. The kids loved the spooky holiday. They were allowed to wear costumes for the themed reading that night and you spent the entire evening before long after the library had closed decorating for the occasion. The sweets you had bought for the kids to eat had come out of your budget but seeing their wide eyes upon entering the small library on the 31st had been worth every single penny—or cent, in this case—spent.

Danny Roper came too. Dressed in a mummy costume with a face full of paper-white make-up and armed with an orange pumpkin basket for his sweets, he was one of the first kids to make himself comfortable in the reading corner in the front row. But there was someone else with them that night. Someone you had never seen around before. He didn’t look like a new bodyguard but he was handsome. Blue eyes, a sharp jawline, high cheekbones, a five o’clock shadow, and dark-blond hair you instantly felt the urge to ruffle. Your heart skipped a beat when he locked eyes with you for the first time. You could practically feel his intrigued gaze burning through your skin when you read some child-friendly Halloween stories to the kids and from then on… he kept on coming back. Sometimes in the company of Danny and his bodyguards, sometimes alone. And each and every single time he asked you for recommendations for a new horror book, borrowed one, and returned the old one giving you detailed and positive feedback that he usually delivered with a charming, British smile.

You realised soon enough that his regular visits were but an excuse to see you again—but he remained distant, never made a move to ask for your number or a date. Perhaps it was for the best, you thought at the time. If he was with Roper then he was not to be messed with, a dangerous man to be around, and not the type of guy you should wish to be affiliated with.

“I’m glad Danny asked me to join him on Halloween. You have made this place truly special,” he had said one day. “Have you known them long? The Ropers?”

Alarm bells. Alarm bells loud and clear had rang in your head and almost drowned out the sound of your book scanner when he’d slid yet another horror novel towards you on the counter.

“Only for about a year. Danny has picked up so many children’s books I will need to restock to find new novels for him at this point. Richard Roper donated ten thousand euros to the library back in January.”

“Are you the owner of this library then?”

“Oh no, I only work here. But I am in charge of all the boring accounting paperwork.” Whatever had lit up in Jonathan’s blue eyes, was gone again before you’d had a chance to analyse it. But it had been suspicious enough for you to gather all of your courage, and look around briefly to ensure you were alone.

“I… can I give you some advice? Leave. As long as you still can. Something’s not right about this man. I don’t know what that poor kid is caught up in but my hands are tied,” you had told him with a lowered voice.

Jonathan had frowned at you, pressed his lips together to a thin line. Then, without another word, he had picked up his novel and left the store.

The following night, he’d appeared seemingly out of nowhere after you’d closed the library for the day and asked you out for dinner. One dirty martini afterward led to two and that very same night, you fell asleep in Jonathan Pine’s bed in a luxurious hotel room he was staying in for reasons he had not elaborated on much.

A couple of evenings and more passionate sex—the best sex you’d ever had—later, you had shown him the donation certification, complete with all the relevant bank details. Confidential data which could have gotten you into big trouble, both with the library and Richard Roper himself. A few more nights after that… Jonathan disappeared for a while and you realised that he had only used you—and your body—for information.

It had baffled you back then, when, almost a month after, he showed up on the doorstep of the library, beaten, bruised, and half-dead. No police, no hospital, he had murmured over and over and you, having fallen in love with the man unconditionally, had hidden him and nursed him back to health. For weeks on end, Jonathan Pine lay low in the cellar that acted as an inventory for the library, living off of takeaway food you smuggled down to him day after day. He told you everything. How he had been sneaked into Roper’s family as a spy to put an end to his schemes at long last, how Roper sold deadly weapons that killed hundreds of people, and how incredibly sorry he was for putting you in all this danger.

One night, while he was still recovering from his injuries and you stayed in the library with him to make sure he didn’t develop a fever, he whispered your name in his sleep, hands blindly attempting to reach you, touch you, explore you, and pull you close.

He confessed he was in love with you the morning after and a few weeks later, after Roper had finally been arrested, you moved back to the UK with him. Here you were now, climbing up the career ladder in the publishing industry.

Jonathan had left his spy days behind for now and accepted a job as the night manager in a lovely hotel in the heart of Switzerland over the winter. You’d be apart for a few months and it had broken your heart to hear of it even though you were more than happy for him and the opportunity he had been offered.

Two weeks after his departure, your boss had asked you to join her on a business trip to that very same hotel to meet with an internationally best-selling author whose next book series was going to be translated into thirteen languages.

Jonathan didn’t know you had just landed in Switzerland. He didn’t know you were coming to stay at his hotel. The name the rooms were booked under was your boss’ assistant who Jonathan had never met before. Needless to say, when you entered the lobby and the warm air enveloped you welcomingly, scaring away the Swiss winter air, his stunning blue eyes widened. You failed to suppress your smirk, knowing very well how much he was struggling with remaining polite and professional—after all, you were with your boss and her assistant.

“Good evening! Sorry, our flight was delayed a little. I’ve got three rooms booked under the name Elsa Higgins?” the latter greeted him.

“Ah, yes, Ms. Higgins! Good evening, ladies. Please, allow me to welcome you to the Meisters. My name is Jonathan Pine and I’m the night manager. May I offer you any refreshments?”

Your boss shook the snow off of her beret and began taking off her winter coat. Jonathan was by her side instantly, helping each and every one of you out of your winter gear—even though with you, his touch lingered for just a second too long, his fingertips brushing against the back of your neck. You shivered. Fuck, you had missed him so much.

“Thank you, Mr. Pine,” you mused, watching him struggle a bit with how you addressed him before he poured you all a glass of champagne. Then, he moved behind the counter to sort out your rooms and hand you your keys while the concierges busied themselves with your suitcases and disappeared out of sight quickly.

“Our concierges will be taking up your luggage at once, as you can see. Is there anything else I can do for you in the meantime? Have you had dinner yet?”

“We have, thank you. We’re just very tired from the flight. Could you show us to our rooms? This hotel is so big, I feel like I’m gonna get lost!”

“Of course, dar-, Miss. Please, follow me.” He caught himself before the word “darling” could escape his lips. Chuckling to yourself, you stared at his sexy back and entered the lift right after him.

“He is so hot!” your boss whispered to you. Heavens, he was. He looked so handsome in that navy blue suit and the white shirt… and that tie! You had to remember to get rid of those damp panties of yours later and sneak them into his pockets somehow—because the mere thought of him taking off that tie and using it to bind your wrists together got you so wet you had to clench your legs on the way up. If only your boss and her equally yearning assistant knew you regularly had the pleasure to fuck this man…

Jonathan was reluctant to leave you behind after letting you know about the breakfast times, the pool opening times, and that he was at your service for anything at all, at all times during the night. And oh, you might just take him up on that offer…

“Thank you, Mr. Pine. I’ll be sure to call if I need anything.” You excused yourself to the bathroom and when you came back, yours and the door of your boss were still wide open, denying you the privacy you craved. Besides, Mr. Jonathan Pine had to remain professional at work. You chuckled once more, making quick work of stuffing your spoiled panties into his suit jacket. He pretended not to be fazed by it but for a spy, he was pretty bad at hiding how much he was struggling with keeping his composure.

But that was only the beginning. You were feeling adventurous tonight. And so, after wishing your boss and her assistant a good night, you got ready for bed, making yourself comfortable on the soft mattress and the lavender-scented bed sheets completely naked, and then used the phone on the nightstand to call the reception. It was shortly past two am by now. Surely, the lobby was deserted.

You hummed contently when he picked up and purred your last name with a seductive ‘Miss’ in front of it into the speaker. “What can I do for you?”

“Oh, you see… I’m so lonely in this big suite, Mr. Pine. So very lonely. Is there a way you could keep me company? I am so tense from the journey,” you mused, dragging out your last “so” to the point you could hear him breathe heavily on the other end of the line.

Jonathan cleared his throat. There was absolutely no way he hadn’t discovered yet just what exactly you had shoved into his pocket. He was probably clutching at it with his free hand right now.

“Ah, well, I am afraid our masseuses don’t start their shift until seven am, Miss, but perhaps I can arrange some other… form of… relief for you.” His voice became raspier and darker the more words escaped his lips.

“Really? That would be quite wonderful. You see, Mr. Pine, the sheets are so soft and comfortable, I figured I don’t even need any sleepwear.”

Jonathan took a deep breath. A short moment of pregnant silence followed and then, “I’ll be right up, Miss.” With that, he hung up.

You giggled to yourself, counting the seconds. He must have taken the steps, for only forty-three strikes of the second hand on the clock above the massive sofa in the suite later, you heard a gentle knock on your door.

Rushing over on bare feet, you hid behind it as you opened it for him to conceal your nakedness from the bright lights in the hallway, the both of you drowning in comfortable darkness and only the pale moon shining through the massive windows illuminating both your features as soon as he’d closed the door again behind him.

“I have ten minutes,” he murmured out of breath before his lips came crashing down on yours. You laughed against his mouth, his feverish urgency instantly infecting you. Jonathan’s touch was like a fire ignited inside of you by the single stroke of a match. Step after step, he guided you back towards your bed without ever breaking the battle of tongues you fought out, his hands exploring your naked curves and kneading your butt cheeks thoroughly before pushing you down on the mattress.

Jonathan was above you within a fraction of a second, one of his knees keeping your legs apart, his hand snatching your wrists and pinning them down above your head. Finally, he released your lips to let you catch your breath for a moment.

“Naughty girl, slipping your used underwear into my pockets… you little tease…”

“Aw, I thought you’d appreciate my little gift,” you mocked—your chuckle soon turned into a moan, however, when he gently bit the underside of your left breast, followed by his tongue tasting your nipple.

Jonathan’s dark growl was unlike anything you had ever heard from him when his one free hand struggled to undo his belt and the buttons of his suit trousers. You were pretty certain he hadn’t even taken his shoes off but by the time he finally managed to push the fabric down to his upper thighs, he was as hard as a rock, his red tip leaking precum teasing your entrance.

There was no need for him to prepare you. You had been soaked and ready for him ever since your arrival at the hotel. Jonathan wasted no time. He positioned himself swiftly, pulling your legs apart even further, and then, sheathed himself inside of you with but one fluid movement.

The both of you moaned in unison, his forehead resting against yours. Jonathan kissed you again when he pulled out to thrust up into you, your hips bucking to meet him. His free hand remained where it was—right between your legs where your bodies were joined.

As he fucked you hungrily, his fingers quickly found a little toy to play with—and knowing Jonathan, he was a skilled lover. He had you on the brink of orgasm in no time, his rhythm relentless and his strokes hard.

You arched your back the closer you crept to the edge, breaking his kiss to gasp for air and throw your head back which he instantly took as an invitation to taste your neck and assault it with gentle licks, bites, and kisses.

It was the moment he released your wrists and placed one of your legs on his shoulder to rut into you even deeper, his tip brushing against all the right spots, that made you come undone underneath him. Clenching around his length, he fucked you through your climax until he too found release, only fuelling your arousal when you felt ropes of his seed coating your walls, his member jerking inside of you until eventually, he stilled and embraced you without ever pulling out of you.

“How are you even here?” he finally asked. “I’m so happy to see you, darling.”

“That I could tell.” You grinned, grinding against him and eliciting a little whimper from him in the process. “My boss is meeting a client here. She asked me to come with her, it was quite last minute. I could have called you but I wanted to make it a surprise.”

“You most certainly did surprise me, darling. You know… I think I quite enjoy you calling me ‘Mr. Pine’.”

Your grin grew even wider. “Lucky for you, we’ll be staying the whole weekend, Mr. Pine.”

Jonathan growled once more. He was on you again to stifle your laugh and had you cumming for him again long before his ten minutes were over.

-

A/N: Well that was fun to write! ;-)

[tk-duveraun]

9/? Luo Binghe is SO NORMAL about Shen Yuan

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 (here), 10

Read up through even numbered parts on Ao3

Migrane + Wedding is why delay :) Enjoy!

It was another vision, which should have been obvious even before the System popped up with:

[Quest Complete! User reward: Luo Baixiao backstory fragment]

Luo Binghe followed behind the Original Goods. Luo Baixiao couldn't have been more than fourteen, though with his adult mind, Luo Binghe honestly thought of anyone under twenty as a baby. Was he himself only twenty-five when he died? Yes. Did that change anything? No.

"Not this memory again," came Meng Mo's voice.

"Then don't watch, Old Man," Luo Binghe shot back. He flexed his power and the demon was locked away behind a partition in his mind.

That the Original Goods dwelt on this memory was good information. The fact that Luo Baixiao was clearly heading toward the Bamboo House was even better. Even though Luo Binghe was clearly making progress with Shen Yuan their past was an anchor around his neck.

Luo Baixiao was allowed in, though he clearly hadn't been expected. Shen Yuan took him into his side of the Bamboo House and Luo Baixiao went and prepared tea without being asked.

Luo Binghe frowned at the scene. Luo Baixiao's uniform was ill-fitting, too small. the belt was tied loosely in the front and the collar was wide open, showing off childish collarbones. When Luo Baixiao sat opposite Shen Yuan, alarm bells started ringing for Luo Binghe.

But there was nothing he could do when Luo Baixiao coquettishly splayed his legs to the side rather than sitting properly.

I really don't like where this is going.

It only got worse from there. Luo Baixiao leaned into the table and pulled his arms back to pull the collar even further open. He fluttered his eyelashes and tilted his head to look at Shen Yuan through them.

How dare this unfilial brat! Did Luo Binghe have similar aspirations? Perhaps, but he was both an adult and not actually Shen Yuan's sworn student. What kind of shotabait trash was this? Did Snowball write this? It certainly wasn't in the novel!

[Answering Host: This System used all available resources when instantiating Intricate Rituals with my Shixiongdi.]

I'll take that as a yes, then. Writing it and refusing to post would explain some of the pacing issues and weird cuts. Luo Binghe's stomach turned just watching the scene.

Shen Yuan sipped his tea calmly, not having noticed the show being played for his benefit. His eyes were on his desk across the room; it was piled high with scrolls and letters.

Luo Binghe could only watch in slow motion as Shen Yuan noticed his disciple had sat across from him.

Shen Yuan choked on the tea and coughed, even as he covered his eyes with one delicate hand. "Baixiao!"

That was interesting. Shen Yuan had once called the Original Goods so intimately?

"Baixiao just wants to serve Shizun," he crooned. He was a child.

Luo Binghe held back the urge to gag. What the actual fuck was going on?

[User requested character backstory. End scenario?]

No! I need to see what else this idiot did!

Shen Yuan threw a handful of talismans at the Original Goods. One stuck to Luo Baixiao's forehead, one to his mouth and one to each of his shoulders. Shen Yuan jumped to his feet and audibly gagged, clutching the hand over his mouth until his knuckles were bone white.

He took a few steadying breaths and glanced at his disciple. Even though Luo Biaxiao was frozen in place by the talismans, his robes were still indecently open. Shen Yuan reached into his sleeve again, pulling out an outer robe, but before it could leave his hand, he changed his mind and shoved it back in. He left the room and returned a moment later with a paint-stained drop cloth that he threw over Luo Baixiao's torso.

Shen Yuan's hands shook as he stared at his disciple, trying to decide how to proceed. Eventually he nodded to himself and left the room again. Luo Binghe tried to follow, but since it was the Original Goods' memory he couldn't see beyond the door frame.

Shen Yuan returned with an enchanted box. He opened it with a drop of his blood and a seal formed with both hands. He removed a vial from inside before resealing the box. He tipped Luo Baixiao's head back with his closed fan and then peeled the talisman off of his disciple's lips. Shen Yuan then poured the contents of the vial into Luo Biaxiao's mouth.

"Shizun!"

"Enough! You'll say nothing but the answers to this Master's questions." Shen Yuan snapped his fan open and covered a majority of his face. "Disciple Luo is not possessed, so he will explain what brought this on."

Luo Baixiao attempted to make himself look wronged, but since he could only move part of his face and even that was obsured by the talisman stuck to his forehead, the effect was lost. He seemed to notice because his eyes tightened in frustration and the muscles in his neck visibly tensed as he fought the paralyzing talismans.

After failing in his struggles, Luo Baixiao resorted to crocodile tears. "This Baixiao just wanted to show Shizun his appreciation."

"This master has never once intimated he would be amenable to such 'appreciation.'" Shen Yuan sneered the word with such scorn it was once again unclear whether or not he was related to Shen Jiu. "No child comes up with such ideas on his own. Who told you to do this?"

"No one told this Baixiao to-" The Original Goods choked on his words and tried a second, then a third time. When he failed to speak, his eyes widens in alarm.

"This Master has administered a truth serum. Now, who is giving Disciple Luo orders?" Shen Yuan looked cold and deadly. His eyes were narrowed and looked entirely black over his fan as he towered over Luo Baixiao.

Unfortunately, Luo Binghe couldn't even appreciate it. The reason for Shen Yuan's disgust? Having this idiot baby try to offer him sexual favors. Luo Binghe bared his teeth at the moronic half-demon and paced.

Given Shen Yuan's silence, the truth serum clearly had some element of compulsion that they were just waiting for.

Luo Baixiao growled, every muscle in his face and neck taut as he fought the potion, but eventually he slumped forward, held up only by the talismans on his shoulders. "Linguang-jun."

[bullet-prooflove]

Stockton!Series Part Five: Maternal - Nestor Octeva x Reader

Tagging: @crazy4chickennuggets @kmc1989 @withakindheartx @anime-weeb-4-life @danzer8705 @drabbles-mc @alwaysachorusgirl @witches-unruly-heart @mysoulisasunflower @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @est1887 @mortal--soul @buddinglinguist @spookyboogyuniverse @thanossexual @lexondeck @weiwei0210 @trublu2u @justreblogginfics @oklahomapeach @keyweegirlie @dakotapaigelove

That night you dream of your mother, of the lullaby she used to sing when you were sick. You remember the sound of her voice, her palm brushing over your forehead, the scent of lilacs that always clung to her skin. You only have a handful of memories. You were seven years old when your mother took her own life. It had devastated your father. She had been in pain for a long time, he had explained once you were old enough to understand.

When you wake up, it’s in the guest room in Marcus’s house, Nestor’s body curled around you as he cradles you close. He always sleeps like this, as if he’s terrified that someone will steal you away in the night.

“You were dreaming.” He murmurs, his nose trailing along the curve of your throat, his lips ghosting over your skin. Your hand seeks out his, your fingers entwining as you clasp it to your heart.

“My mom.” You say softly. “I was dreaming of my mom, it’s her birthday today.”

“We’ll visit her, Mi Corazon, before we stop by the house.” Nestor whispers in your ear. “We’ll pick up some flowers, tell her about all the people you’ve helped.”

You twist in his arms to face him, your hands running through his unruly curls. He moans at the sensation, his lips brushing over yours.

“We’re about to be invaded.” You tell him, hearing the pitter-patter of Santi’s feet outside the bedroom door.

Marcus’s adopted son loves Nestor, the two of them had bonded after you’d absconded to Reno and whenever you come over Santi sends the entire time glued to your Nestor’s side. You think it’s the patience he exhibits, Nestor has a soothing presence and takes the time to engage with Santi on his terms.

When the door creaks open, the two of you are already on opposite sides of the bed. Santi’s face peeks around the door, that bashful grin of his lighting up his features.

“Give us a minute chico, we’ll be right out to help with breakfast.” Nestor tells him as he pulls himself up into a sitting position. Santi gives him a thumbs up before closing the door quietly behind him.

You slip out from beneath the sheets and Nestor watches, taking a second to appreciate the sight before him as you pull a pair of leggings underneath the old Navy t-shirt of his that you’re wearing.

“You keep looking at me like that and we’re going to get interrupted again.” You tease him.

He laughs before pulling back the duvet and reaching for his jeans.

“This…” He says, using his palm to gesture to the bedroom door. “This is why I don’t want kids.”

You smile in response to his words. Despite your inability to have children, Nestor has never made it an issue. He doesn’t skirt around the topic, he doesn’t pretend it doesn’t exist, he accepts it and you in entirely.

“Yea.” You as you snatch up your oversized cardigan from the back of the chair. “It’s definitely one of them.”

***

“Marcus didn’t come home last night.” Izzy tells you over breakfast. “He’s taken a trip up to Stockton with Bishop and Taza to discuss club business.”

The three adults in the room know exactly what that means, the two kids however remain completely oblivious. Santi’s in the throes of showing Nestor his collection of Pokemon cards and Tessa’s enthralled in the most recent Angie Thompson novel. Already she’s a budding activist.  

There is no doubt in your mind that Marcus has filled Izzy in on the situation. That man keeps no secrets from his wife, you think it’s the reason their marriage has always been so successful.

“Why don’t you guys show Nestor what you’ve done in the garden?” Izzy says to her children, inclining her head towards the backdoor. “The vegetables they’ve planted are just starting to grow, they’re trying to figure out names for all of them.”

“I think I can help with that.” Nestor says taking the hint, Santi’s hand slots into his as Tessa sets her book down and races off to locate a marker pen and the plastic tabs, they’ve been using to label each veggie. “I’m thinking Diego.”

Izzy waits until the children are gone before she takes up residence in Nestor’s vacated seat. She reaches out, her fingertips brushing the hair away from your features so she can study the bruise that lines your cheek.

“It’s not your worst.” She says, her lips pursing together in a grim smile. “How are you doing?”

You open your mouth to speak but Izzy raises her hand to cut you off before the words leave your mouth.

“Don’t give me the ‘I’m fine’ crap.” She says quietly. “I know you’re not ok.”

You laugh. It’s a hollow sound that seems to bubble up in your chest.

“No I’m not.” You admit, rubbing your hands over one another. “They came into our home Izzy, they tried to murder us in our sleep. They were members of the club, Nestor’s brothers and they…”

You exhale, trying to stem the rage that rushes through you.

“I’m so mad Izzy, it is taking everything in me not to head over to Stockton and burn down their fucking clubhouse.”

There are tears in your eyes, they leak down your cheeks because your home was somewhere you felt safe, it was the place that you and Nestor had built together. Now it’s been violated, ruined because you’ve fought back against the man who put his hands on you.

Izzy takes your hands in hers, clasping them tightly. There’s a reassurance that comes with this woman, there always has been. She may not be related to you genetically but she’s the closet thing you have to a maternal figure you have in your life.

“Trust me when I say that it has been taken care of, that those men will never come after you again.” She tells you resolutely, pressing her forehead against yours. “You and Nestor are a part of our family, and we look after our own Rosa, we won’t let anyone else hurt you. I promise you, you’re safe with us.”

Love Nestor? Get added to his tag list!

Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

[alliswyattonthewesternfront]

my greatest asset as a "smart kid" was knowing that i really wasn't all that smart. every monday my pops would take me to the library, where i'd max out my library card to check out the full twenty-five books, and read them all by the next monday so i could get another twenty-five. this went on from ages 5 to 18, and everyone around me would say "oh, wyatt is so smart they read so much so fast". but i knew this wasn't the case. for one thing, it's easy to read a lot of books when you're homeschooled with no one friends

for another, i wasn't reading academic texts. i wasn't reading classics. i read plenty of that kind of thing as part of my school curriculum, so i saw the library as a source of leisure reading 90% of the time. i was reading horror novels and trashy romance and manga and comics. i'd read nonfiction, but only about whatever topic i was fixiated on at the time. dog grooming, parasitology, the elephant man, and cat breeding, to name just a few. i wasn't trying to better myself! was trying to chill!

adults would tell me how smart i was, how i should be a doctor or lawyer. and all i could think was: "i don't see how reading Anne McCaffrey could possibly translate to my getting into med school." this has got to be why i can't relate to any of the posts about burnout or ego death i see from the gifted kid program refugees on here. being smart for small town* white trash isn't the same as being smart in the grand scheme of things. i do feel bad that so many of y'all bought your own hype, but once i found out adults lied about santa claus, i figured they would lie to you about everything and took everything they said with a grain of salt.

[queereads-bracket]

Queer Fantasy Books Bracket: Round 2

Book summaries below:

The Dark Artifices series (Lady Midnight, Lord of Shadows, Queen of Air and Darkness) by Cassandra Clare

It’s been five years since the events of City of Heavenly Fire that brought the Shadowhunters to the brink of oblivion. Emma Carstairs is no longer a child in mourning, but a young woman bent on discovering what killed her parents and avenging her losses. Together with her parabatai Julian Blackthorn, Emma must learn to trust her head and her heart as she investigates a demonic plot that stretches across Los Angeles, from the Sunset Strip to the enchanted sea that pounds the beaches of Santa Monica. If only her heart didn’t lead her in treacherous directions… Making things even more complicated, Julian’s brother Mark—who was captured by the faeries five years ago—has been returned as a bargaining chip. The faeries are desperate to find out who is murdering their kind—and they need the Shadowhunters’ help to do it. But time works differently in faerie, so Mark has barely aged and doesn’t recognize his family. Can he ever truly return to them? Will the faeries really allow it? Glitz, glamours, and Shadowhunters abound in this heartrending opening to Cassandra Clare’s Dark Artifices series. Fantasy, young adult, paranormal, urban fantasy, series

When Women Were Dragons by Kelly Barnhill

Alex Green is a young girl in a world much like ours, except for its most seminal event: the Mass Dragoning of 1955, when hundreds of thousands of ordinary wives and mothers sprouted wings, scales, and talons; left a trail of fiery destruction in their path; and took to the skies. Was it their choice? What will become of those left behind? Why did Alex’s beloved aunt Marla transform but her mother did not? Alex doesn’t know. It’s taboo to speak of. Forced into silence, Alex nevertheless must face the consequences of this astonishing event: a mother more protective than ever; an absentee father; the upsetting insistence that her aunt never even existed; and watching her beloved cousin Bea become dangerously obsessed with the forbidden. In this timely and timeless speculative novel, award-winning author Kelly Barnhill boldly explores rage, memory, and the tyranny of forced limitations. When Women Were Dragons exposes a world that wants to keep women small—their lives and their prospects���and examines what happens when they rise en masse and take up the space they deserve. Fantasy, historical fiction, alternate history, 1950s

[justafairytailofinnocence]

Modern Thranduil x anxious reader

Caged birds with broken wings

Chapter 1:

A Dance with tardiness

Synopsis: An antisocial, anxious writer in her early 20s attends a ballet class under the teachings of a mysterious, reserved, austere dance instructor. They form an unlikely within their solace and past.

Warnings: mentions of blood

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

A/n: This fanfic doesn't follow along the lines of the hobbit but rather a loosely spin-off au that only uses some characters. I do not own the right to them as they are Tolkien's characters and I respect his creation. (even if the characters might be ooc). Feel free to comment, reblog and like. Let me know if you'd like a chapter 2.

I tended to daydream often, more so when I listened to the music. The tune and tone of the song that played one after the other sent me to the realms I immersed; typically, anyone would daydream into another realm far better than their own: a princess, pirate, elf, fae—anything. My imagination is my realm of comfort, a sealed bubble that I can freely roam however I wish. Unfortunately, within fantasy, we must face reality. Within my reality, I’m not much of an importance, at least not one to have a whole written memoir about. I’m more of one of those faces you’d pass by in the street or grocery store, not giving any second thought to. Though I’d prefer it that way, I’m not much of a talker but rather a writer; I’m more fluent in my words than my speaking. Every attempt I’ve made, I’ve stumbled or become still; my chest would rise heavily and lower deeply. I always asked how people can do it, how they can speak—talk—communicate like it’s a piece of cake. I’d rather shroud myself in my isolation than speak to another living being.

At my desk, in my somewhat clean apartment, I was planning my next latest story in a saga of 3 books. So far, I’ve managed to get in contact with a publishing company via email who were willing to get behind the idea of a feature-length young-adult romance novel, a romance novel about a pirate king and a fae queen. The first chapter was still relatively underdeveloped, yet I’m willing to spend an entire day finishing it. I had only five months to publish the entire chapters. I’ve been a fantasy fan ever since I was a child. To me, fantasy is what the word impossible turned into possible. For ten years, I’ve been writing, and never once has it stripped me of what I truly adore.  

Whilst my fingers pressed against the keys on my keyboard, I received a text message on my phone from the side of my desk surrounded by papers. It was from my mom, who was wondering about my well-being. As always, I respond with the usual ‘everything’s going well—I’m pumping out new chapters for my new novel, ‘A Puncture in Time’, you know—the one with pirates and fantasy, new chapters soon to come ;)’. Even though she’s smart enough to see through my little façade, she writes back, ‘Hey listen, I know it’s hard right now, but I can assure you, things will get better; it just takes practice; I know you’ll meet someone you’ll find it easy to talk to’. I sighed heavily; within her words, I have faith, yet doubt. Should I choose to believe her, bite the bullet and try to speak up or wallow in a lie that can send her mind at ease? Before I wrote back, she sent a post with a link. I furrowed my brows as curiosity swelled my thoughts, my finger tapped the link. It was an ad. An ad for ballet classes. I thought it odd why she would send me something like this: I’m no dancer; I’m certainly no ballerina.

I replied with a question mark ‘?’.

A message bubble popped up: ‘…’ I awaited her reply.

As she was still typing, I took the liberty of glancing through the ad quickly. The tab loaded with a cursive font in bold ‘Les danseuses se réjouissent’. Scrolling past the stock images of ballet dancers, I came across a small section of different levels offered: beginner, Intermediate, and advanced. My mind raced with doubt; I had no experience in ballet, at least not since I was a young child. I wondered to myself, ‘Do I really want to take this? After all, I’m not exactly one for groups’. However, my mind was put at ease when my eyes came across an option for ‘one-on-one private lessons’. At least, I wouldn’t be with people who were far more experienced—let alone a group; the thought of many eyes staring at me—would have my heart sink. As I clicked the option, I was astounded; there were no reviews, pictures, or even a description of the instructor. I was sceptical. Surely, if you were to teach a class, you’d have at least a brief introduction of yourself. Even as an author, I have a concise introduction in my publications. I lightly sighed, weighing my options; on the one hand, it’ll please my mom, get me out of the apartment, and keep me fit; on the other hand, despite being private, I’m meeting someone I don’t know. Who knows what this person’s intention is, even if it’s for a class.

Finally, I heard a ‘ding’ as she replied, ‘Please try, at least for me; it’ll be good for your health, and you once mentioned you wanted to be a ballerina. I know the world isn’t always what we want it to be, but I know you can make it shine; I’ve seen it in your novels; give this a chance, give them a chance, to show them how you can shine, because I know you’ll be the brightest star there :).’

My eyes softened as I read every word; I couldn’t deny she had a way of getting through to me. She was always a caring woman, along with my dad. They were the only two people I could speak to without pressure or the weight in my chest.

I pressed back onto the tab with the private lessons. I clicked to see the booking dates—there’s an option to book for tomorrow, and the price is only $45 per lesson. For the price, it wasn’t too bad; yet still expensive. I filled in the details required to send the booking through, yet my finger hovered as I was about to press ‘confirm’. My mind came to a tussle of thoughts and hesitations; this would be the first time, in a long time, that I would speak face-to-face with an actual living being. However, I recalled Mom's words, ‘Because I know you’ll be the brightest star there’.

Breathing in—I pushed it, I pressed confirm.

I did it. I’m going to attend a ballet class. My head slowly lowers onto my desk, surrounded by papers. My hair dangled over my forehead. The adrenaline that reached the height of my mentality came crashing down. It’s like going on a rollercoaster you didn’t ask for, coming from the highest point of the rail down to the pit below. I start to feel light-headed. I want to sleep. I want to stay here. Perhaps I’ve made a mistake. What if this doesn’t work out?

I rose slowly from my desk chair, picked up my phone, and texted, ‘I’ve booked lessons for tomorrow…I hope you're right about this.’

I watched as once more, awaiting her response, ‘…’

‘Oh, I’m so happy, you’ll fit right in, I know it :)’ she texted.

I didn’t respond. She’s pleased, at least.

I decided to call it a night; I’ve had enough pressure for one day. I logged off, cleaned the papers on my desk, pushed them into a neat-ish pile and headed to the bathroom to shower. As I opened the door, I went inside to set down my pyjamas by the medium-small bathtub’s acrylic side rim. My bathroom isn’t big exactly, but neither is it small. It’s moderate for what it was: a bathtub, shower, toilet, sink, and a medium-sized mirror in the same room. It’s not precisely palace material, but it helps soothe my thoughts. I held my hand out as I turned on the shower, feeling the trickling water against my skin. The temperature quickly changed from cold to warm in just five seconds. Once I was satisfied, I stripped bare, sliding my long-sleeved green shirt off and sliding my darker tracksuit pants. I tossed my unmentionables inside the bathtub. I stepped inside the shower, allowing the warm water to run freely down my skin. I shut the shower enough to have a slit entrance still. I grabbed the soap, rubbing it over my skin, arms, legs, and body. I splashed water on my face as the water rinsed the suds away. I hovered my hands in my eyesight, glancing closer at my fingers. I could see the redness and patches from where I’d picked my skin; it’s a habit I developed since childhood. The habit would annoy Mom, often whispering or saying straight, “Stop picking”, even touching my hand to remind me. Unfortunately, this habit hasn’t subsided; I sometimes even look at my skin with little care, picking the cuticles or rough patches.

Once I finished scrubbing my body with soap, I turned off the water and opened the shower door to step onto the bathmat. I grabbed a towel from the single towel rack located beside the shower. I dried my body, running the towel over my skin. As I wrapped the towel around my body, I glanced at my face in the mirror above the sink. They say eyes are the most expressive in emotion. My narrowed, pinkish lips thinned.

I snapped out of my gaze, continuing to slip on my long blue pants decorated in owl prints, then, the next, a long-sleeve top with the basic purple on them topped with a giant owl embroidered in the front area. Owls have always resonated with me, whether it's their symbolism or captivating beauty. I placed the towel on the side of the bathtub’s rim. I picked up my previous clothes and took it into my bedroom. My bedroom was also medium sized, having a queen-sized bed and an oaken cupboard with a mirrored wardrobe. My room was decorated with tiny figurines I’d collect overtime, albeit from movies I’ve fancied or books. I placed the clothes in my hamper basket behind my door. My body relaxed when my eyes lingered toward my bed, the messy, deep blue sheets draped to the left side. I dismissed the thought of tucking them in for the time being, only plonking myself onto the mattress and wrapping myself within the single cotton sheets and doona drifting off.

Dreaming is the easy part, letting what visions came to my mind run wild. Sometimes, it’s suitable for inspiration, but other times, it's nightmares. The imagination is still enchanting, although, this time, it was peculiar. I was in a birdcage decorated with gold; the entrance was bolted shut; my hands gripped the golden rods holding the cage together. I tried to scream but to no avail. I tried to shake the cage, yet I was too small to provoke movement. My body lowered, feeling the coldness of the metal plate below. I had nothing but rosy ribbon pointe shoes. I suddenly felt myself, in no control, rise as though my limbs were attached to strings. I started to dance, my arms and legs stretching to fit the perfect movements. Eventually, I stopped mid-movement, standing on one leg while extending the other behind. I couldn’t move; I was frozen in place. I could do nothing but shut my eyes.

Suddenly, I woke up; my eyes fluttered open from the confusion I had just endured. Rising from the bed, I pondered for a few seconds. ‘What on earth did I dream about?’. My hands pressed against my face, trying to comprehend my dream and reality. I pulled the sheets off me and got up for the morning. A typical morning for me results in the usual routine: dressing, brushing my teeth and hair, and then looking forward to what the day offers me. Until I remembered that I had booked that class. I typically picked out green tracksuit pants with a white singlet, hoping that would suffice. I picked up my purse and headed out the door to my car. I entered inside, placing my purse in the front seat as I turned on the white car. I noticed outside that it started to snow. Snow is beautiful, especially the little snowflakes that fall into your hand and dissolve upon touch.

As the car started, I prepared to drive to wherever it was that awaited me. The location was further from where I lived; it must’ve been at least twenty-eight minutes. The drive wasn’t particularly bothersome for me; when you live in New York, you get used to the traffic.

As I drove, the snowflakes emerged in more significant numbers. Eventually, I found parking just next to the side of a café. I wasn’t aware if it was for the staff or guests. However, it seemed empty with only a few cars, so—if I get called out on it, I’ll move my car. No one seemed to notice, so I assumed I was okay. I grabbed my black parker from the back and zipped it up. Exiting the car, I stopped to admire the snow falling for a few seconds. It was January 4th, so the snow season was still here. My hands shoved in my pockets, beginning to wander toward where I needed to be. According to the ad, it was building ‘52’; it was vague, I know, but it was the details given. I trudged through the snow, seeing building after building, until I came across something with the number ‘52’, where I needed to be. My hand gripped the gold-looking handle attached to the glass door. As I entered, I came upon a staircase; I took one step after the other. I quickly glanced at the ad to see what floor it was on, yet to no avail. Was it the ‘4th floor? Oh god, oh god, please don’t resort to me asking someone. My fingers started to twitch; I raised one of my fingertips to my lips, feeling the rough patches. My thumb started scraping off the first layer, and small blood trickles formed. I ran my fingers over my lips again as I trailed up the stairs. I could feel my chest becoming heavier, my mind swell with thoughts of self-doubt. Suddenly, the anxiety soon started to subside as my eyes saw the sight of a door. My fingers hesitantly wrapped around the door handle; I took one breath in, trying to be brave. I pushed it open—only for my worst nightmare to come to life.

My breathing became heavier, my heart sank, my eyelids widened, and I could feel myself hyperventilating. There was a group of ballerinas staring directly at me. There must’ve been at least four? Five? Looking my way! Their ages varied, going into their late 20s.

The one brunette asked in French “es-tu perdu, cherches quelqu’un”.

I couldn’t concentrate; my mind dwelled with clouded thoughts of judgment. I pressed my finger against my lip, trying to feel the rough patches.

Another asked in English, “My friend asked if you’re searching for someone”.

Quickly, my eyes diverted to the ground, avoiding their gaze. “I-I-, pr-viate, less-on”. I stumbled over my words.

“Lessons? Private lessons?” the girl spoke once more.

I nodded, avoiding eye contact.

As I quickly glanced, a middle-aged woman in her mid-forties stepped closer; I assumed she was the dance teacher. “Are you referring to the private dance lessons advertised? the one taught by Mr. Oropherion?”.

I paused for a moment, trying to gather my words. Mr Oropherion? Is he the teacher I’m with?

“I-Is. This. Right. Floor.” I tried to sound out the right words, but it was impossible. Perhaps my conscience was right; perhaps this was a terrible idea.

The middle-aged woman, confused, pointed toward the direction I needed to go. “you’ll need to head up one more level, then head to your right” Her voice was calm with a hint of soprano.

Still avoiding eye contact, I left, not even saying thank you, focusing on wanting to escape. I closed the door in front and let out a heavy breath. My head lowered to touch the tip of my hands. I wanted to melt in that moment; I wanted nothing more than to return home. However, I reminded myself that I was doing this for Mom. I breathed in once more, looking up at the door; my hands quickly released, and I began to walk quickly, edging further up the stairs. My mind came crashing down, feeling the dreariness wash over me. Feeling tired, I finally, at last, came across the door I needed to be. It was blank, the painted white withering away around the edges. My hand reached the doorknob, feeling the roundness, turning it slightly. I could feel the adrenaline kick in. I was hesitant, but my nerves started to build.

I started to whisper to myself, “Just a general hello, that’s all it takes—

You're doing this for Mom—

Give them a chance to show them how I can shine; give them a chance to see who I am because I’ll be the brightest star there”.

 I breathed in, closing my eyes and opening the door. As I tried to force my eyes open, I was confused. There was no one here. It was an empty space surrounded by mirrors with bar beams attached to them. My eyes scanned the room, yet no one was there. I suppose I should be relieved, maybe the teacher had caught a sickness and decided to ditch the whole class. I wandered further inside; I might as well take a quick peek. I unzipped my black parker with a furry hood, tossed it on the coat hanger and took off my shoes, leaving my white socks on. I stood in the middle of the dance room, embracing the quiet ambience. I looked in the mirrors, reflecting my figure. Was this even what ballerinas wear? Who even is Mr. Oropherion? If he doesn’t show up in the next 15 minutes, I’m heading off and not returning.

Perhaps Aelwynn, the fae queen in my novel, would’ve also been able to dance freely and eloquently in movement. I still wonder what would entrance the pirate king Sarek Salazar. I never pictured him to be devilishly handsome, though. I suppose Aelwynn would be a beauty, but there must be more to it—beauty can only go so far in their bond; what would their obstacles or hardships be? Perhaps the fae queen is somewhat intertwined with difference, the opposite of a fairytale. Aelwynn is fair, kind, beautiful and strong; she meets all the criteria for something otherworldly, yet what if Sarek is her opposite, a beast? No—What if he was average, a gross-looking thing? Pirates are anyway; what if he wasn’t powerful, just an average man with greed—and the dynamic changes, challenging Sarek to choose between the love of his life or treasure?

Or he would choose—

Suddenly, I heard a male voice emit behind me: “You best have a thorough explanation, girl. Do not even think about squandering my precious time.”

My breathing became heavier as I realized someone was speaking to me. I did not turn around; I was afraid to. Instead, I avoided eye contact, too paralysed to move. My head stooped low, and my hands stood to the side. He spoke again, “Clearly, you are here for a reason, are you not? I’ll admit your intrusion is rather fatuous.”

I didn’t glance up; I couldn’t look; I needed time to gather the words to explain. What should I say? Hey, sir, some ballerinas told me to come here, and I fear speaking to people.

“I see you have a mouth; that means you must have a tongue. Go on, speak.” His voice was deep and tranquil, composed yet icy.

I took a deep breath in, slowly turning around. As my legs moved, I slowly gathered the courage to look into the man’s eyes, even if I muttered a ‘hello’. It would be enough. As my head glanced up to meet his, I noticed his appearance.

He—was like—something out of a fairytale. His face was lean and chiselled; his eyes were like ice; his blueish-greyish irises complemented his cold gaze. His hair tressed down like water reaching his chest, light like snow. Whilst his skin was pale in comparison, a fair tone in colour. His attire seemed far more affluent than mine, donning a black trench coat with white underneath. His trousers complimented the darkness of his coat, and his black loafers were polished. I glanced at his right finger, an oval-shaped ring with a diamond glass stone crafted in sterling silver.

“Did you hear me not the first-time girl?” his tone turned stern.

My mouth moved, finally finding the words to speak. “H-hello, I’m Y/n”.

 “y/n?” he muttered.

My eyes glanced downward once more as I slowly nodded.

“So, you have a voice after all, pray, tell. Why are you lingering in my domain?” he said shortly.

I muttered “private lessons”, though my voice sounded like a whisper.

“Ah, so you’ve seen the ad; I suppose you haven’t wasted our time after all, although you are five minutes late; I expect punctuality, to be exactly on time at the hour.” His voice sounded stern once more.

Well gee, it’s not like it’s my first time here, and gotten lost. My eyes still avoided his; I couldn’t look up, so I nodded.

He didn't react when I avoided his gaze, dismissing it. However, he commented on something else: “Your posture is lamentable. Stand up straighter like so.” The tip of his finger lightly touched my chin, lifting it to meet his gaze. I didn’t turn away precisely, yet I still flinched. My breathing slowed down as I once more met his gaze. His eyes narrowed, and his lips thinned.

“You stand there like a bird, wounded by the natures of evil, ignorant of the world’s knowledge, caged and sheltered from the shadows that lurk within the realm. Tell me, little bird, care to spread your wings?” I glanced at myself in the mirror, standing straighter. I could feel the flush in my cheeks, but I didn’t say anything, only breathing slowly.

 His finger pulled away, and he turned his back to me, walking away.

“I expect to see you here tomorrow at exactly the seventh hour of the night”.

“Do not make me regret my decision, or you shall return to the cage from where you came, little bird”, He muttered.

With that, he walked out of the room, distancing himself further and further away. At that moment, I stood in disbelief for a few seconds, trying to understand what had happened. However, once my thoughts were collected, I gathered my things and scurried out of there, wanting nothing more than to enter my car. Once I exited the building, I was hit with the coldness in temperature as it touched my face.

I opened the car door, tossing my things in the back, turning the engine on. I looked back, trying to see the building to the left. As I drove, my thoughts were plagued with astonishment. I didn’t look away; I maintained eye contact for longer than three seconds, and—I managed to speak my name without stumbling over my words. My emotions displayed were as if I’d seen a ghost. Yet—his face—his appearance—it reminded me of snow; I always loved snow; even when I was a child, it was the happiest of my memories. I recall when my parents took me to the park; I was fascinated by the sight of the winter wonderland, my face lighting up with delight and laughing with joy. I always find that snow rekindles the fond memories I have.

Perhaps Mom was right after all; this might be the start of something I’ve never been able to do. Talk.

[checkoutmybookshelf]

When Your Murder Mystery Party Goes A Little Too Well

Ally Carter has not missed yet with her adult novels. The Blonde Identity was a delight, and so was this book. The marketing pitched this book as a "Knives Out Christmas romance," but I haven't actually seen Knives Out, so I can't comment on the comparison. What I can comment on is how Agatha Christie meets James Bond the setup and characters are (I also got a few Castle vibes at points), and how fluffy and fun that was. This book also had quite a lot to say about gaslighting and recovering from being gaslit, which I deeply appreciated because seriously, people have got to STOP gaslighting their partners. It's BAD, actually. So let's talk The Most Wonderful Crime of the Year.

Hey, hi, hello. This is your SPOILER WARNING because I am going SPOIL THIS BOOK below the cut. Be warned.

When Maggie's publisher gently bullies her into going to a secret Christmas party thrown by Maggie's favorite author of all time, the publisher neglects to mention that Maggie will be travelling with Ethan Wyatt--former secret service agent turned writer (again, I told you I'd spoil the book) who is also the vessel Maggie has transferred all her self-loathing to in the wake of her nasty divorce and significant career setback.

The two have a somewhat contentious five-year history, which comes to a head while they're trapped in an old English Manor House in a blizzard. The communication between them has a great arc, and the use of time jumps is handled beautifully--by the time the reader is like, "what the heck WAS this incident!?!?" We get it and invariably we get some new context or perspective that just makes Maggie and Ethan's relationship even more fun to watch.

I will say, Maggie's ex, Colin, is the kind of raging douchecanoe we love to hate, and I deeply appreciate that the book didn't try to get empathetic or redemption arc-y with him. For fucks sake, the man took HALF OF MAGGIE'S COPYRIGHTS in the divorce and made her buy him out to get them back. The sheer LEVEL of dick move on that one floored me, and I adored that even a deeply hurt and gaslit Maggie understood that those rights MATTERED and that she got the important thing when she got them back.

The fact that Ethan also sees that and was like, "yeah no, you got YOU back and that's worth it" might have made me melt a little.

I also really enjoyed the bit of nuance in Ethan's backstory. Ally Carter LOVES writing spies. Like absolutely adores it. But what was interesting this time is that Ethan is a former spy who was pretty aggressively put out of commission by a severe injury, and his arc is really squaring his two identities: spy and thriller writer. It doesn't get as much page time as it maybe could have, because this is a fluffy Christmas romance, not a hard core novel about squaring identities, but its there and drawn clearly enough that it made sense and was fun to watch.

Overall, the whole book feels like just a slight shift could have brought it darker or more serious, but it stays light and fluffy, and I'm not complaining about it, because it was a sheer delight to read.

[whump-me]

Unseen: Chapter 7

Chapter 7 of Unseen, a novel-length whump story about a ruthless mob heiress and the superpowered assassin she kidnaps and forces to work for her—and the unexpected friendship that develops between them.

Masterpost | the Mind Games universe | Read the complete novel on Patreon

---

Sitting behind her father’s desk, Yvette felt five years old again. That was how old she had been when she had first sat in this chair. She had barely been able to peer over the top of the thick mahogany desk. She had picked up a stack of papers and frowned intently at them, muttering under her breath. Pretending to be her father, hard at work.

Her father had given her one of his rare indulgent smiles. Back then, she had thought he was proud to see his daughter follow in his footsteps. It wasn’t until years later that she realized he had been amused. He had thought her playacting was cute.

Now, as a grown adult, she still felt like she was playacting. The varnish of the wooden chair was worn away in the pattern of her father’s legs, not hers.

The papers in front of her were covered with scribbled notes in her own handwriting, and she had all but memorized the columns of numbers on each of them. That didn’t matter. In her mind, she was a five-year-old playing at doing her father’s work without truly understanding it. Maybe she always would be.

She wondered if the man sitting across from her saw her the same way.

She had known Stefan Kurti for as long as she could remember, although she had never exchanged a word with him beyond him telling her what he’d like to drink. His appearance was deceptively unassuming. His suit was plain, a dull gray-and-white that didn’t betray how much money had gone into each stitch. His hair was thin on top—he didn’t bother with a combover anymore. His eyes were too small for the rest of his face. On first glance, it would have been easy to miss the sharpness there.

It was a good thing Yvette had gotten much more than a single glance at him over the years.

He was one of her father’s long-time business partners, and one of the most reliable. Like many of her father’s contacts, he worked in imports. What he imported was weapons. He sold most of his stock to her father, who passed it on to his stable of happy customers—at a hefty markup, of course.

Not enough of a markup, in Yvette’s opinion. She thought the market could handle more. It wasn’t as if Kurti’s brand of exotica was easy to find. But that was an issue for another day. If she didn’t secure the stock, the details of pricing wouldn’t matter.

Kurti leaned forward in his chair, shifting his considerable bulk. His canny eyes held a gleam that made her feel slimy all over. She was reminded of the rumors of his other imports—the ones that went solely to feed his own unpleasant tastes. But her father had always found it more profitable to ignore those rumors. Yvette could do the same.

She took a long breath in. The office smelled like her father. Unexpected tears prickled at the corners of her eyes.

She should have held the meeting somewhere else.

No. He needed to see her behind her father’s desk. He needed that image of her authority. She swallowed the tears down and fixed him with a cold smile.

Her father had always waited for the other person to speak first. He would make them endure silence for as long as it took them to lose that game of chicken. Yvette had picked up that trick early on. This was the first chance she’d had to use it.

It worked. “Reynold didn’t tell me why you wanted to meet,” he said. “He only said you wanted to meet with me personally. I admit, I’m intrigued.” He licked his fat lips. They looked like two rain-swollen worms crawling across his face.

From his position next to the door, Reynold cleared his throat. “This is a business meeting,” he said, his voice quiet but firm. “I expect you to be professional.”

That was just what she needed—for her father’s business contacts to think she needed her father’s assistant to protect her. “Leave us,” she said, in a tone she had learned from her father. “I can handle him.”

“Are you sure?” Reynold asked.

No. The thought of that door closing, with Reynold on the other side of it, made her want to flee out the window.

She gave him a curt nod. “As you said, this is a business meeting. The details of my father’s business have never been your concern.”

The worry on his face nearly undid her. It would have been easier if he had looked hurt. He returned her nod and slipped wordlessly out the door.

It clicked softly shut behind him. She wished she were on the other side.

“Alone together.” Kurti licked his wormy lips again.

Yvette fixed him with her coldest stare as she drew herself up to her full seated height. “I sent my people to renew our usual deal yesterday, after your regular shipment came in,” she said. “Imagine my surprise when I heard you had already sold your entire stock to someone else.”

His lips parted. His eyebrows arched up into upside down V’s. It looked like that hadn’t been what he had expected to hear. And not just because he had been hoping for a proposition.

That was bad news.

“I sold the stock to the Couvillion Syndicate,” he said, confirming her suspicions. “It looks like you have an internal problem.”

“To whom in my syndicate?” Yvette asked.

“Who else? Representatives of Nathan Stanbury. I’m told he runs things now.”

A small smile played at the corners of his lips. Those canny eyes watched her.

So his surprise wasn’t entirely genuine after all. He knew very well what was going on here.

“You were told wrong,” she said. “I had a message sent to you explaining the new hierarchy last week, before your shipment ever came in. You should have waited for the people I personally sent.”

“I thought perhaps there had been a change in power since your message,” he said. “It’s not unusual, after someone of your father’s stature dies, for power to change hands several times.”

“Then you should have contacted me before making the sale. Unless you were already aware you were going behind my back.” She met those beady eyes of his, and didn’t look away.

He shrugged without guilt. “I’m not in this business to help widows and orphans. I make the deals that are most advantageous to me. Stanbury offered a better deal.”

“You must have known I would find out.”

“Does it matter?” He displayed his smile in full view now. “We both know that in a fight for leadership between you and Stanbury, he’ll come out ahead. He has decades of experience. The sympathy vote won’t count for much.”

She clenched her teeth. That was the only outer show of temper she allowed herself. “Tell him you won’t be working with him in the future, and I’ll be willing to overlook this.”

He shook his head. “His terms were too good for that. Better than anything your father ever offered.”

“What did he give you?”

He named a price. Yvette’s jaw clenched hard enough to send a spike of pain up the side of her face. She knew what was in those shipments. When Reynold had called her downstairs with his message, they had gone over the sheet together, looking at every last piece of inventory.

Stanbury had overpaid. It wasn’t a good business decision… unless his objective was not to maximize profits, but to close Yvette out of her own syndicate.

Yvette ran through the numbers in her hand. If she raised prices by ten percent more than she had already planned… no, it would have to be twenty. That was a risk. Customers wouldn’t be happy. Some would look elsewhere, even if they had to make do with inferior products.

But if she lost Kurti’s weapons, she would lose a full twenty percent of the syndicate’s income source, at least until she found an alternate supplier. Worse, Stanbury would gain that twenty percent.

Only eighty percent to go.

It took effort for her to unclench her jaw enough to speak. “I’m willing to beat that for your next shipment.” She named a price that would have her father’s accountants pulling out their hair and moaning into the strong drinks they would pour especially for the occasion.

Kurti shook his head. “I’m sorry. I already promised Stanbury a long and fruitful business partnership. I’d hate to go back on my word.”

“In other words,” Yvette said, “this isn’t about the money. You think you know the way the wind is blowing, and you want to be on the right side.”

“I’m glad we understand each other.” His smile broadened. His wormy lips seemed to wriggle on his fleshy face. “Now, unless there was anything else?…” He eyed her hopefully.

Yvette stood. “I have another meeting, I’m afraid.”

“Later, then.” He reached across the desk and grabbed her hand with surprising alacrity. He made as if to raise it to his lips.

She twisted her fingers in his grip until she had hold of his pinky. She bent it backward until his face went white and a startled moan of pain escaped his lips.

She let go. “When you reconsider,” she said, “contact Reynold to make an appointment. My schedule is rather full at the moment, but I’ll make time for you.”

When he was gone, she sank into her father’s chair. She felt even smaller now—four years old, three, a squalling infant. A spasmodic tremor ran through her.

She took a deep breath. She straightened her back, and stared at her hands until the trembling stopped. Then she called Reynold on the intercom. She was sure he was still here.

He came to her with embarrassing speed. He must have been waiting just down the hall.

Had he been so certain she would need his help? Had he been so sure that she would fail?

Reynold didn’t ask her how it had gone. She was sure one look at her face was enough to answer that question.

His eyes shone with the warm sympathy that had filled the empty spaces in her heart when she was a child. Now it set her teeth on edge.

She gave him the same look she had given Kurti. But she could only keep it up for a second. Then she looked down at the desk—her father’s desk. Not hers. Never hers. Her shoulders sagged. Her breath caught.

“I’m sorry, Yvette,” Reynold said.

His soft voice made her jaw tighten again. “It’s not over,” she reminded him. ��Do you think my father never had trouble with any of his suppliers? You know better. You were there with him through all of it.”

“My offer is still open. I can help you walk away from all this.”

“What I need you to do,” Yvette said, “is look into my father’s other suppliers. Make sure Stanbury hasn’t gotten to them.”

Reynold was silent for a second too long.

“You already did, didn’t you?” Yvette asked. “They already are.”

“I’m sorry,” Reynold said again. There was something offensively final in his tone. Like he thought the battle was already lost.

“I sent them all messages after my father’s death,” she said. “I made sure they understood who they would be dealing with from now on.”

“I know,” Reynold reminded her. “I proofread them all for you.”

“You said they were masterfully done.”

“They were,” Reynold said. “Stanbury must be willing to operate at a loss in order to unseat you. It’s a risky strategy.”

“Not if the money is only an excuse on both sides, and they’ll all go back to the original deals they had with my father soon enough,” Yvette said. “Stanbury thinks I don’t have a chance. If that’s how they all think…” She shook her head. “It will be a self-fulfilling prophecy.”

“Haven’t you ever wanted to get away from all this?” Reynold asked, with a surprising amount of wistfulness in his voice. “Now’s your chance.”

Yvette looked up at him sharply. “It sounds like you’re speaking from experience.”

“Whether I wish your father had chosen a quieter line of work is immaterial,” Reynold said. “Your father loved what he did, and I…”

Yvette didn’t make him finish the sentence. “And I plan to follow in his footsteps,” she said. “But you don’t have to. You can walk away at any time.”

Reynold shook his head. He tried to hide the sadness in his eyes, but she knew him too well.

“I promised your father I would take care of you,” he said. “When you were young, that meant looking out for you when he was too busy. My responsibilities have changed, but my promise hasn’t.”

“If you don’t want to stay, you shouldn’t stay,” said Yvette. “Find a nice beach somewhere. Enjoy a well-deserved retirement.”

“My responsibilities didn’t end with your father’s death,” Reynold said. It was impossible to say whether his sadness was only at the mention of Yvette’s father, or more than that. “One could say they’re just beginning.”

“I don’t need someone to look after me.” Did no one believe she was capable of taking over her father’s empire? She had thought Reynold, at least, was on her side.

But being on her side and having respect for her weren’t necessarily the same thing.

“You’ll have me for as long as you need me,” Reynold said. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Yvette did not point out his unspoken assumption there—that she would always need him. But her lips thinned, and she went quiet.

After a few minutes, he seemed to get the hint. With a nod, he left the room.

Yvette slipped out the door after him. What she had told Kurti hadn’t entirely been a lie—she did have someone else she needed to meet with.

When she reached the fourth floor, Violet was still sitting on the couch. Yvette might have thought she hadn’t moved at all, except that a box of fresh-baked cookies now sat beside her. She had chosen chocolate chip. The cookies were half gone, and chocolatey crumbs littered Violet’s silk shirt. Violet didn’t seem to notice. Her eyes were glued to the flickering screen. Bugs Bunny.

Yvette cleared her throat. Violet jumped. The cookie in her hand flew into the air and landed facedown on the floor.

Violet started to stand up. Yvette shook her head and sank onto the other end of the couch. Violet didn’t complete her motion, but her entire body tensed, like Yvette had caught her in the middle of another escape attempt.

“You like Bugs Bunny?” Yvette asked, nodding toward the screen.

“They’re like drawings,” said Yvette. “But they act like people.” She gave a shy giggle. “It’s funny.”

“And chocolate chip?” Yvette asked.

Violet frowned. She tilted her head in a silent question.

Yvette pointed at the cookies. “Chocolate chip. That’s what the bits of chocolate are called.”

“Chocolate chip,” Violet repeated, with the seriousness of someone repeating a new vocabulary word in a foreign language. “They taste like candy. I had candy once. When I was a child.”

Sympathy swelled Yvette’s throat. Then she swallowed it down. There was no reason to feel sorry for Violet and her deprived childhood. That was all over now. Yvette had saved her.

What Yvette wanted in return wasn’t so bad, really.

“I’m glad you’re enjoying your freedom,” she said. For a second, she wished she could leave Violet here, eating chocolate chip cookies and watching cartoons.

But what she needed was just a minor thing. It was nothing, to someone with Violet’s training. And when it was done, Violet could come right back here to her TV and cookies. She wouldn’t be returning to a cold, empty cell.

Yvette’s eyes flicked to the bracelet. She quickly looked away.

“I need a favor,” she said.

---

Tagged: @suspicious-whumping-egg @whump-kitty @violets-whumperflies

Ask to be added or removed from taglist.

[ljsmiths-thenightworld]

FORBIDDEN TALES

An Interview with novelist L.J. Smith, found using the Wayback Machine. Originally posted on nightworld.net (🛑 which is definitely no longer a fan site)

L.J. Smith is the author of nine bestselling novels for children and teenagers, including the two series The Vampire Diaries and The Secret Circle. The first volume of her latest series The Forbidden Game, is in bookstores now.

Q: Why did you decide to write novels for young adults?

A: I decided to write for kids when I was a kid. I knew the kind of books I liked to read and there just weren't enough of them. Nothing to do but write them myself. I'd been telling myself stories ever since I was four or five, and writing them down was just the next step. I suppose the real question is: Why am I still writing YA books, since I haven't been a young adult for...ahem!...well, quite a few years.

Could be arrested development. I must admit that I still read classic children's books, and get a lot of pleasure out of it. Books about fantasy, magic, and the supernatural just excite me, and I love to read them and write them. I'd like to write books for adults someday, but I hope I never grow up completely!

Q: How did you get your first book published?

A: I finished The Night of the Solstice the year I got out of college. I'd been working on the book since I got the idea for it in high school, but the writing went slowly because I was busy studying psychology. Besides, everybody told me that I could never make a living being a writer, so there was no hurry!

I took my book to a professional typist (I didn't even have a typewriter in those days, much less a computer) and she got very excited about it. She said it was the best manuscript she'd seen, and she had a friend who was a literary agent, and asked if I was I interested in being agented.

I was. Very. Of course, it still took some time to get the book sold -- for one thing, I had to cut it by a hundred pages! But eventually Macmillan bought it, and my fate was decided. I loved writing and I knew I had to keep doing it.

Q: What is your educational and professional background?

A: I got my BA in Experimental Psychology from the University of California at Santa Barbara (great school! great beaches!) I have two teaching credentials from San Francisco State University, one in elementary education and one in Special Ed. I've taught kindergarten and special education, and enjoyed both -- but now I'm writing full time. Every fall I get very nostalgic about teaching, but writing is more fun -- and it pays better.

Q: Who are some of your favorite writers?

A: This is a tough one. There are so many, but I really tend to like the classics. I adore Dickens' characters and his playful, whimsical prose. I love Jane Austen's gentle satire, and Mark Twain's dry wit. I read Steinbeck, Alice Walker and Toni Morrison when I want to cry. For sheer escapism I like fantasy or science fiction -- Tolkien and C.S. Lewis and H.G. Wells. Or detective stories, like Dorothy Sayers' Lord Peter Whimsey series. And -- please don't laugh -- when I'm sad, I cuddle up in front of the fire with L. Frank Baum's Oz books or Laura Ingalls Wilder's Little House on the Prairie books. They always make me feel better.

Q: What advice would you give a teenager who wants to be an author?

A: WRITE! Write, write, write. And read, read, read. Those are the two most important things you can do.

Write all the time -- write in a journal, scribble down ideas on napkins at McDonald's, spend a boring class scrawling poetry in your notebook (Okay, maybe that last isn't the best advice, but I admit it worked for me.) Write anything and everything you like, and don't be critical of yourself. Just let it come out and worry about whether it's good later.

Write when you're feeling something; when you're mad, or in love, or in pain. The passion will come through. And write about what you know, write about your own school, your friends, your take on the world. Teens often think their own lives are boring -- they want to write about exotic places, weird people, things out of their experience. But it's best, especially at first, to write what you know. It may be hard to expose your most private self to other people, but that's what writing is about. And the ring of truth is unmistakable.

Reading is the other important thing. Read all you can and read a variety of books. You'll absorb all sorts of good things, grammar, vocabulary, plot structure -- even if you don't realize it. Try the classics, and keep trying them as you get older. Some things that you think are really boring and stupid right now will suddenly become interesting as you mature. A little light goes on in your head and you say, "Oh, so that's why everybody likes Chaucer, wow."

Q: Is there anything else you think will interest teenage writers?

A: I've babbled on long enough. But I think it's great that Writes of Passage is giving kids a forum for their work. This kind of encouragement is just what teenagers need. Good luck!

[runningoutofbooks]

Reading Wrapped 2024

This was a great year of reading for me! This was the first year I had goals other than book count. And I am proud to say that I met all of those goals (and even exceeded them)!

[This year I also reread a series that I read when I was young. I wanted to see the books from an adult perspective. And, well I can definitely see why I enjoyed them, I also noticed so many things that I didn't when I was a kid. It was an eye opening experience and I am glad I did it.

So you will notice a certain author crop up in my stats, I just want to say briefly that I do not share the same beliefs and opinions as this author. I try to keep my life and my blog a safe place!]

So without further ado:

A few stats:

Reading goal: 100 Actually Read: 118

Last year I was just shy of 100 books. So this year I challenged myself to reach that goal. And, boy howdy, did I reach it!

It was not easy, I think it was only possible because I read so many graphic novels. I will be lowering my reading goal for next year.

DNF: 3

This is the first time 'Did Not Finish' has appeared in my Reading Wrapped. I am trying not to force myself to finish books. There are so many books, and so little time.

First time reads: 97 Rereads: 21

10 less rereads this year than last year. I'm pleasantly surprised, I love rereading books, and sometimes I get a little stuck rereading the same things over and over, so it's nice to see myself branch out a little more.

Physical Books: 91 Audiobooks: 17 Ebooks: 10

Look at all those ebooks! 3x what I read last year. Less audiobooks though.

Average book length: 311 Pages Longest book: HP And The OOTP by JK Rowling (895 Pages) Shortest book: The Beatrice Letters by Lemony Snicket (72 Pages)

That’s a big jump between shorted and longest, bigger than last year.

Fiction: 106 Nonfiction: 12

This was one of my extra goals this year. I challenged myself to read one nonfiction book a month. Even though some months I skipped and some months I read more than one nonfiction book I think I fulfilled the spirit of the challenge!

Top 5 Genres and Subgenres:

1. Fantasy (56) 2. Queer (40) 3. Mystery (31) 4. Comics (23) 5. Middle Grade (21)

This was another extra goal of mine to get queer books into my top five Genres and Subgenres. I was so sad last year when it didn't make the cut. But not only is it in the top five it is second on the list!

I want to give a shout out to @queerliblib for making this goal possible! Having access to queer ebooks and audiobooks through the Libby App was amazing! Thank you!

Top 5 Authors

1. Shannon Watters (19) 2. Kat Leyh (15) 3. Jenny Nimmo (8) 4. J.K. Rowling (7) 4. Lemony Snicket (7) 4. Elizabeth Peters (7) 5. ND Stevenson (6)

19 books by the same author is a new record for me! Also you'll note that there are more than 5 authors listed, three of the authors tied for 4th.

Book that took me the longest time to read:

How To Stop Time by Matt Haig

Do not even get me started on this book.

Book that took me the shortest time to read:

Lumberjanes Vol. 1: Beware the Kitten Holy by Grace Ellis, ND Stevenson, and Shannon Waters

Favorite book of the year:

Terry Pratchett: A life with footnotes* *The Official Biography by Rob Wilkins

And that was my year!

I can't wait to see what 2025 holds!