#it took me forever to finish the episode because i kept pausing to scream

[dramashii]

Dating Era

LOVELY RUNNER (2024) | Ep 11

[damn-stark]

Forever

Damon Salvatore x Fem!reader

Requested by anon “May I request a Damon x Reader where the reader is dying and Damon tries to save them with his blood, but he's too late.”

A/N- :(

Warning- mentions of blood, some fluff, pure sadness

Episodes- 6x21, 6x22

———

“Isn’t a bridesmaid dress supposed to make you look like a freak of nature?”

You chuckle and walk to meet Damon halfway, “Jo went easy on me.”

Damon grinned smugly, “regardless I’d think you’ll look hot even if you wore a trash bag.” You scoff and roll your eyes in a lighthearted manner at his comment before a smirk tugs at the corner of your lips as your eyes study him in his tux.

“You know I think I'm preferring you in a tux instead of shirtless.”

Damon smirks, “sure you do, y’know you can’t resist me without a shirt on.” His smirk falls and his face turns serious except for the softness his eyes contain as he asks, “do you finally have an answer for my question?”

You sigh, “it's a hard choice, Damon. Choosing to be a vampire after seeing what our friends have gone through. It scares me to think what might happen if I do become one.”

“What scares you exactly?” He asks unsuringly. “That you might not—”

“No,” you cut him off, knowing exactly what he was going to say without him having to finish his sentence. You loved him and have for a long time, nothing will ever change that, not turning into a vampire or anything, so no the fear wasn’t because of that; “I know how Stefan suffers with controls and I saw how Caroline and Elena suffered without their humanity. I’m scared of that.”

“If you do, I’ll be there every step of the way, you know that.” Damon tries to assure you with an added assuring smirk, “plus I’m the master of control and make a pretty hot teacher. And if you don’t want me to teach you, then there's also Caroline I guess.” He shrugs, making you laugh.

Your laugh however doesn’t last as you remind yourself of the choice you still have to take, of your question you had that has been invading your mind all night and day. “What if,” you pause and swallow thickly, letting your eyes fall to the elegant rolled out carpet, “I don’t choose to become a vampire?” You look up to meet his gaze and see that the softness behind his eyes has totally dropped and turned assuring instead, choosing to take the couple steps left to cup your cheek.

“Then I guess I’ll have to live with that even if I do want to be selfish and just turn you. I love you and I’ll support whatever choice you make, even if it means that one day I'll have to lose you because you're too old and wrinkly and your heart chose to stop beating.”

Tears roll down your cheeks and you smile softly, “you'll love me even then?”

His lips break into a smile before he pulls you in for a sweet and slow kiss in the middle of the church, breaking away only far enough where you could still see how much bluer his eyes were as the sun peeked through the window and gently kissed his face. “even then.”

——

“Welcome family and friends on this magical evening to the wedding of Alaric Saltzman and Josette Laughlin. Josette and Alaric have prepared their own vows.”

Jo turns and hands you her bouquet as the reverent finishes her greeting, letting you offer Jo an small assuring smile before she turns around to face a very nervous Alaric so he could start his own speech. A sweet one that makes you like many others in the crowd begin to feel tears roll out.

“Neither one of us should be here right now. We’ve spent our lives dodging fate, beating the odds but because we did I got to meet you, the most beautiful, hilarious and intimidatingly brilliant woman I have ever known. You inspire me…”

Your attention wavers mid sentence as you realize with this speech, with this setting of Jo and Alaric getting married, minutes before they’re to become husband and wife, before they’re to share the rest of their lives together that you want this too. That you want to share your life with Damon forever or however long forever last. And the idea of not being to have control still scared you, but it’s like he said, he’d be with you every step of the way. And that thought didn’t scare you. Being with him forever didn’t scare you.

Because you’d rather be with him for however long forever last, instead of losing him when you’re too old to be without him.

“...you’ve shown me that happiness,” you hear Alaric continue saying as your mind wanders back to his vow, “is actually something that I can have in my life.” Albeit your full attention on the vow doesn’t last long as you catch Damon’s gaze, notice the smile on his lips as your eyes meet and the smug way he lifted his eyebrows. The gesture making you smile whilst the attention he had on you made you whisper your answer to his question very softly, but in a way he would hear regardless.

“I’ll do it. I’ll become a vampire.”

His smile widened like yours, sharing a sweet and short intimate moment before the both of you had to pull your attention back to the couple in front of you, hearing as Alaric finished the rest of his vows and slid the ring on Jo’s finger. “And so, I promise to be with you and I love you and to dodge fate with you for the rest of our lives.”

Emotion smiles collectively break through the crowd at the end of Alaric’s speech, all preparing to still hear the vow Jo had to give. “Oh, god.” She wipes the tears off her eyes and giggles nervously, her words making the crowd laugh as well, “that’s a tough act to follow. Here it goes. Alaric Saltzman. You are—” she suddenly and abruptly cut herself off.

“Jo? What is it? Jo, oh my god. Jo?”

She groans out in pain and her hands move to her stomach, making Damon move towards her and Alaric grab her as she tumbles over and screams out in pain. At first you don’t know what caused her to stop and scream out, but your eyes then catch the sight of blood bleeding through her white dress before out of nowhere her brother Kai appears behind her with a bloody knife in hand. You gasp and step back, feeling your lips part as you hear Alaric begin to cry for Jo and Kai talk in front of you.

“I was gonna wait til the “death do us part” bit, but it seemed a little on the nose. Am I right?” Your eyes meet Damon’s to share a concerned look, a tragic gesture that would be the last one ever—you want to move towards him, but you’re left speechless and frozen in your spot before Kai does a spell that makes a sharp ringing break through your ears and a painful headache pound in your head. Making a deafening and painful scream escape your lips and your hands to fly up to grab your head.

Living a short and painful moment that seemed like it lasted hours when it was only minutes. Short minutes of blinding pain before everything turned for the worst and every window in the church broke and every shard of glass went flying inwards; and you were thrown out of your spot and felt a new sharp pain stab your neck. Leaving you only seconds to witness every memory of your life flash through your eyes before you hit the floor with a nasty thud. Being left with only pain and a warm feeling spilling down your neck, onto the ground beneath you and onto your arm where you recognized it was blood. You gasped and let your eyes drift to the ceiling, trying to focus on the tragic sounds around you that slowly began to tune out, only because you tried to hear if Damon was calling to you so could assure him that you were there, alive but in pain.

But as you were trying, every feeling in your body, every pain, all the worry began to drift; just like the lights above you began to dim and the pain in your body which was once immense was now nothing but a dull feeling that began to numb. Letting you realize that forever wasn’t going to be an option, that the life you now chose to live with Damon, the love of your life, was going to be nothing but a last dream. A happy dream though, one you chose to cling onto as your life slowly came to an end and darkness overtook everything forever…

Leaving you to miss the way Damon came to you as soon as he could, desperately trying to hear the sound of your heart beat but missing it as there was no rhythm. A fact however that he could accept as he took you in his arm and cradled your body, using one hand to cup your cheek to try and begin to talk to you so he could hear you respond.

“Come on baby, come on. Please, you’re okay. You’re fine, baby. Come on. Come on!” He cried, again trying to focus on finding the sound of your heart, ultimately finding nothing again. “Baby.” He breathed, moving his hand from your cheek and biting his wrist to break through his skin and have blood spill from his wrist, moving it to your mouth so you could drink and healed. But as he tried, nothing happened, your eyes remained lifeless and your body stiff.

Damon kept trying however, desperately trying to press his wrist onto your lips to have you drink the blood, but nothing happened, the blood just stained your lips and didn’t move down your body. Letting him realize only heartbreaking moments later that it was too late. That he had reached you too late and that you were gone forever, after you had accepted to become a vampire to be with him forever.

He cried and rested his forehead on yours as he began to rock your body back and forth, forgetting about the horrifying scene around him.

[ositabear26]

Blaming

This is published on Wattpad at OsitaBear26, Mutant Apocalypse: book 6 - The Valley (Chapter 70)

Osa strolls the hallways, hearing her nieces squeal with such intensity, and that ruckus startled her sometimes. Ever since the Wicked War ended, she's been having some terrible PTSD moments throughout her present days. Her heart raced whenever she heard some kind of commotion going on around her home, and the volume never died down.

If she heard screams, accidental gunfire, saw a knife, it bothered her greatly. She brought a hand to her chest, trying to calm her crazy heart and mind that is full of false reality. "Breathe..." Osa says, inhaling deeply and exhaling it out. "I'm home. I...I'm home."

She pinned her back against the wall, seeing the images inside her head from that night. Osa could see Lilac grin, hear Amber's screams, feel Leo's last breath, Ranger whimpering for help, the constant gunfire, so many things went on at once inside her head. The infected chomping at her neck, the roars, shrieks, it's like she is still there-- like she never left that battlefield.

And a hand suddenly touches her shoulder. "Osa?"

"AH!" She yelled, swatting her husband's hand away. Osa flinches at her Donnie''s soft touch. She panted, looking up at his scarred face, her nerves shaking underneath her skin. "It's you..." She says in relief.

"You had another episode, didn't you?" He says, noticing the sweat on her temples.

"It was mild." She replied bluntly, refusing to make eye contact as she walks back to Donnie's bedroom, him following her. "It wasn't big like last time."

"Babe," Don says. "You've been wandering around a lot lately and we both know it can trigger--"

"Don't." She said, opening the door to her old bedroom.

"Don't what?" He says, coming into the room with her.

"Don't call me 'babe'." She said, pulling a drawer open by her nightstand. Osa starts to yank clothes out, tossing them on the bed. "And I've told you to not talk to me."

Donatello knew why she was being like this. She has had a massive grudge against him since Cormac died during the Wicked War. She blamed him for her brother's death because he didn't get to him in time. Through her mind, Osa thinks Donnie let Cormac bleed out and didn't attempt to save him. "Rosita," Don said her full first name. "I know you're mad at me, but..." He sighed, coming closer to her as she packed her bag. "You can't let this go on forever."

She laughs at him. "Yes, I can." Osa continues stuffing her clothes into a small duffel bag. "You knew. You KNEW!!" Osa points a finger at him. "You saw Cormac ride into battle, knowing it was a terrible idea, right?" Osa looks at Donnie as she zipped her bag up. "Right?" She repeated.

"Right..."

"And you didn't stop him. Instead, you let my brother get shot to his f*cking death!!" She shouts, tears pouring down her face within seconds. "Y-You let... Leo die. You let Bayard, Barran, the leaders, Amber-- EVERYONE die."

Don usually never took any of this talk personally. He just knew his wife was upset about losing people she cared about so much. Her brother is one of them who made it a lot harder. But now that she brought Don's brother into this, he fired back without thinking. This time, he did take it personally. "Do not bring Leo into this!!" He yells. "Don't blame everyone's deaths on me! I was there! I was there when Leo took his last breath, and I put down Amber!!" He bellows. "We knew people were going to die by this piece of sh*t group!"

Osa narrowed her eyes at him through her glasses. "I didn't know my baby's father would become an assh*le."

"What the f*ck, Osa?" Don barked. He shook his head at her, thinking her hormones got the best of her. "You know what? Your hormones can kindly f*ck off!"

"Oh, f*ck you, Donnie," Osa said, pushing past him with her duffel bag full of small items.

Donnie rolled his eyes, following Osa out into the hallway. "No thanks! You already did that!" He knew how to get under her skin even more. "But if having sex gets you to talk to me, I'm down!" 

Osa snapped around, nearly halfway to the balcony of the Commons. "Yeah right! You'll be lucky to ever touch me again!"  

"At least we'd be sober this time around!" Donnie screamed. "And I wouldn't have to imagine what it would be like while jerking off in the bathroom!" He screamed probably louder than he meant to because anyone that was in the hall heard him.  

The mutant turtle didn't want to go after Osa. He went back into the room, yanking his glasses from his face and throwing them on his bed. As the new leader, he was stressed with so much going on around him. He was in charge of a lot of people, Anzen, the chores, keeping things organized, and he was going to become a father in less than eight months.

Donatello didn't understand how Leo did this when he was alive. He sat down in his room, not sure what to do next. He put his flesh and bionic hands on his forehead, resting over his knees.

Vincent was listening to the conversation the entire time and slowly came around the corner. She peeks into Donnie's bedroom, finding him sitting on his bed. "So..." She started, making Donnie shoot his head up. "You really jack off in the bathroom?"

"What the hell are you doing eavesdropping?" He snapped at her, slightly embarrassed. He felt his cheeks heat up after that piece of information had been heard.

"It was kinda hard not to when you guys were shouting so loud," Vincent replied, walking through the door. "What's going on?"

Don scoffed, thinking of how stupid this is. "Osa and I got into an argument."

Vv groaned, pulling up a chair to sit down. "Again? What about this time?"

"What do you think? She still blames me for her brother's death and I--" Don was trying to explain what the argument was, but Osa's father, Squire stepped into the room with two simple knocks.

"Hey, what's going on?" He asked, squeezing his wings through the narrow classroom doorway.

Don kept quiet for a few seconds before answering his father-in-law. "Osa and I started up..." He says, not very fond of this whole situation.

Vv leans back into her chair, looking up at Donnie. "You guys seriously can't keep doing this. You both have a kid on the way. Speaking as a mother, you both need to work this out as best you can for your baby's sake."

Squire crossed his arms, looking at his tall mutant son-in-law in the eye. "Donnie, if she was your girlfriend, damn, I would end it..." He paused. "But you're both married, and you have some major history I don't know of. Since you got a kid coming, you gotta make amends somehow."

Vincent agreed, nodding to him. "Yeah, Don." She says. "If you were just a plain couple, end the relationship. But you got a baby coming, you're married, you have a unique bond and--"

"Unique bond?" Don chuckled at Vv. "She's-- she's a--"

"Being a bitch?" Vv finished for him.

Donnie and Squire look at the young woman sitting in the chair, surprised by the choice of words she used. "What?" The turtle says.

"A bitch." Vv said firmly. "She's pregnant, so am I! We're bitches! We blame it on the hormones."

Squire breathed out deeply. "Well, she does have a point." He says. "Rosita is also a shapeshifter with a lot of animal DNA which makes things very difficult."

"Well, f*ck." Don replied, leaning back on the mattress with his hands.

The Flight shifter shifts his posture to Donnie. "I'm gonna give you one piece of advice and that is to go and talk to her again. It won't be easy, I get it, but you still need to try. I won't tell you what to do, okay? I'm just encouraging you to keep trying." Squire turns away, squeezing out of the bedroom and walking down the hallway.

Don looks at Vv. "You got any advice, too?" He asked her.

"Don't f*ck up." She says, smiling.

"Wow, you are a bitch." He laughs with her.

"Thanks," Vv says, standing up. "But seriously, if you need me to talk to her, I will. But it should be you first." She walked up to the door, approaching the hallway.

Don stopped her. "Hey, Vincent."

She turns around. "Yeah?"

He smirked at her. "Thank you for being like a sister to me. Really."

"No problem." She grinned widely, patting the doorframe once. "And speaking of sisterly love, jack off in your room next time." Vv left the room, giggling.

Don smiles, giving a thumbs up.

[hotchley]

mortch having a girl, specifically hotch coming home after a bad case to see derek-with glasses ofc- holding their babygirl while reading hotch’s high school play script

Grace I am in love with your brain and I need you to write this properly, but for now, enjoy this little drabble... thing whatever, we’re going with it (and I hope you liked the other mortch headcanons!!) 

the best thing they ever did

I don’t know what else to call it and all of the songs I’ve been listening to are sad and look... either of them with a daughter is just the best thing and yeah so please be gentle

Also where in canon is this? Fuck if I know, Tara and Luke are on the team but Derek left and Jack is a teen and Hotch is retiring in a few months and like Mr Scratch the episode did happen but not the shit after?? but that’s not that important just go with it 

read on ao3! (I cannot believe I am doing this)

tw: vague crimes against children, the slightest implication of child abuse

Cases with children were always hard. But cases with children, when he had two at home and Derek wasn’t there to ground him or make everything better by simply holding his hand and drawing circles were awful.

So awful that he just wanted to bury his head in the lumpy pillow at the hotel and scream. He missed feeling Derek’s arms around him as he slept, and he missed falling asleep on his shoulder, and he missed the scent of his shower gel.

He just missed Derek. And Jack. And their little girl. He couldn’t believe he had a daughter. He had always wanted to give Jack a little sibling, but his own failures had meant that never happened.

Until it did. Just in a completely different way to what he was expecting. He lost Haley to George Foyet, yes, but he gained a new family that he thought he would never find. And he knew Haley, wherever she was, was at peace, watching over him and the loves of his life with pride and happiness.

In the end, they saved the children. Their lives would never be the same and this would stay with them forever, but they would, with the right support, recover and flourish.

He used to tell the team that saving a victim was the best thing they could do because he needed them to carry on having faith in what they did and not start doubting whether or not they made a difference because they did.

But he too had wondered whether or not it was worth it. When he thought of everything Foyet had put him through, had his life really been worth saving?

And then he saw Jack. Jack who would always miss his mother and the person she had been to him, the woman he remembered, but Jack that looked at Derek and called him Papa without feeling guilty. Jack that sometimes got angry and threw tantrums but was every bit the boy Haley had raised.

And he knew that it was all worth it. As he thought of Derek- good and kind and beautiful Derek that had stuck with him through everything and held him after Mr Scratch had forced him to see his family die- he smiled. 

Derek Morgan was the best man he knew. And every single day, every single moment, he considered himself lucky to call him his husband. He knew how difficult it was for Derek to wave goodbye each morning, knowing first-hand the horrors of the job. But Aaron only had to do a few more months before the Bureau would give him his pension.

And when that day came, he was going to retire and join Derek at the local community college, where they would teach the next generation of lawyers. Together. Like they were meant to. Because even before they had fallen in love- unwillingly and resentfully realised that actually, they did care about each other a lot- they had been partners.

But before then, he would carry on with the BAU, writing reports until his eyes started to hurt and he has to fight back tears every time he looks at the photos. This time though, his desk was suspiciously void of paperwork that wasn’t absolutely essential to the case.

When he looked into the bullpen, Emily and Luke’s piles seemed significantly bigger. Tara and Spencer also had larger piles, but those were decreasing at an incredibly fast rate. 

He smiled to himself and pulled his phone out to text Derek that he would be home sooner than expected. But as he gazed at his lock screen- subconsciously counting down the days till he could change it to the family photo- he decided he would surprise them instead.

With the knowledge that he would soon be home and in the arms of his loved one, the paperwork was slightly more bearable. It was still brutal and heartbreaking and he kept needing to pause to stop himself from sobbing, but there was a light at the end of the tunnel.

Derek’s presence had always been more than a light, but still.

He finished before anyone else of the team, but he didn’t feel guilty leaving. They didn’t need him to hold their hands anymore. They hadn’t for a while, but Derek’s departure after the birth of their daughter- their beautiful daughter- had driven the point home.

It was why he was going to be able to leave without any regrets.

It was dark when he unlocked the front door to their home. Home. He thought he had lost that after Haley left. He never thought he would find it in Derek, but he would never stop feeling grateful that he got a second chance at a family. A second chance at being happy.

All the lights downstairs were off, so he assumed they had all gone to sleep. He checked Jack’s room and saw that he was peacefully asleep. Maybe it was the case, or the nostalgia that came with leaving, or maybe he was just a better man than his father was, but the sight of him sleeping without stirring or being haunted by nightmares bought on a wave of emotion so overwhelming he had to hold the door handle.

With every passing day, Jack looked more and more like his mother. Once upon a time, it would’ve been like a dagger to Aaron’s heart, but now it just made him smile with a fondness he hadn’t realised he was capable of.

Even though Jack wasn’t a child anymore- he was almost as tall as Hotch- he still found himself quietly entering to press a soft kiss to his forehead. He closed the door properly as he left, knowing his son would appreciate the thought in the morning.

The door to the nursery was also closed. Either she was sleeping, or Derek was still awake with her. He wouldn’t be surprised if it was the second. Derek loved their daughter the way he did everything in his life: with passion, the utmost care and his entire soul.

He hesitated in the doorway of their bedroom, wanting to enjoy the sight for just a moment.

Derek, in nothing but a thin t-shirt and pair of shorts, clearly ready for bed, and glasses that he somewhat resented wearing because it reminded him that he was getting older, holding their daughter in his arms. He held her like she was the world.

And in some ways, she was.

Aaron smiled at the two of them. And then he heard what Derek was saying.

The book in front of him was not the storybook Haley had bought Jack when he was a baby. Nor was it one of the many gifts they’d received from the team.

It was the script for the Pirates of Penzance. The same one Hotch had scribbled his notes all over, so he would know exactly where he was meant to stand and when he was meant to enter and leave. He wanted to be offended, but he couldn’t help but smile.

Theatre had been the start of his and Haley’s love story. He loved that Derek was so willing to celebrate it.

“I hope you’re doing the voices right,” he quipped, as Derek started to recite the first of Pirate Number Four’s two lines.

Derek turned and Aaron was still so taken aback by how stunning he was that whatever he was going to say died on his lips. He smiled slightly, trying to not give away how much the case had affected him.

“I thought you could use something good today. Em told me what happened. Do you want to talk about it?”

Not today. Tomorrow he would, but tonight he was going to love his daughter and fall asleep in Derek’s arms. So he shook his head and went over to the two of them.

His daughter babbled and smiled at him, wrapping her little hand around his finger.

“Hello darling,” he cooed. “Did Papa make you stay up for me? Or did you do that yourself?”

Derek laughed, a joyous and warming sound. “She did that herself. In fact, she almost woke Jack up with her screaming. I think she knew her daddy would be home today. Didn’t you?”

Aaron smiled as she carried on smiling at the two of them. “Thank you for staying up. I know I’m back earlier than usual, but it’s still late.”

“You don’t need to thank me,” Derek said, still rocking the baby in his arms. She was a beautiful baby. And one day, she would be an amazing, strong and vulnerable woman. But for now, she was his little girl.

“I know. But I want to,” Aaron said in response. “Did she really almost wake up Jack?”

“Yep. She wanted to be held, and then I thought I would read to her, and I remember getting this out for Jack earlier. It just felt right. Haley had so many lines, how she remembered all of them is beyond me.”

“She was ethereal on that stage,” he said. But thinking of Haley didn’t hurt now. It hadn’t for a while. JJ had been right. He was happy.

“I’m going to change out of this suit,” he said, after a few moments of silence passed. Derek nodded, not even moving to put her back in her crib. When Aaron returned wearing Derek’s old pyjamas, he was still rocking her gently.

“You’ve never looked quite so beautiful as you do when you hold her,” he confessed quietly.

Derek smiled, passing her over. “And you never look as relaxed as you do when she’s in your arms.”

He laughed, then responded with: “Gas.”

Derek rolled his eyes in that fond way he always did, but he laughed along nonetheless. And when Aaron’s eyes started to droop, he took the now sleeping baby from his arms and went to the nursey.

As he set her down, he brushed his lips across her forehead, wishing her a peaceful sleep. 

“Goodnight, Penelope Haley Hotchner-Morgan. Have the sweetest dreams,” he said, leaving the door slightly open so some of the light could get in.

Aaron had fallen asleep in the few minutes he had been gone for, on top of the duvet and with his feet dangling off the end of the bed. Derek smiled at his sleeping figure from the door, wondering how anyone could look so sweet as they slept.

Derek moved him to be under the covers, having done it enough times to know how to do it without waking him up. When Aaron’s breathing remained even, he breathed a sigh of relief and climbed in on the other side.

As if he just knew, Aaron rolled over, burying his head in Derek’s neck as he wrapped his arms around his husband, feeling like home was perfect once more.

[caffiine]

A BRIEF PAUSE

From my regularly scheduled content. I’ve got some shit to say, y’all (forewarning for spicy language and spoilers)

I thought about making this post on my fandom subblog but this show and this relationship have been TOO important to me for the past 8 years to not give it its proper place in my life. strap in bc im not sure how long this mf is about to be.

When i started this DUMB show at age 19 tortured soul “empath” dark academia me thought sam winchester was going to be my favourite character. and don’t @ me, i love sam now in his own right (and we deserve some SAILEEN PEOPLE). but after literally less than 5 episodes i KNEW dean’s character and his arc were going to be amazing and beautiful and he immediately became my favourite brother. The nuances of his character i.e. his shell vs his true self were so evident to me even in the first couple seasons. in my humble opinion, he had the most growth of the two brothers.

They all deserve to be happy, but for whatever FUCKING reason dean has the HARDEST TIME OF ANYONE being happy in this show. I know it’s his character. I know it was written that way. But FFS.  I kept wondering when they were going to wrap up his emotional arc and stop torturing the poor dude.

then in season 4 they introduced castiel and 1) I thought the new concept of angels as assholes was super cool and 2) I hardcore SIMPED over misha collins (still do). I watched benignly as cas and dean began to form this relationship that seemed pretty special. I started watching the show when it was in its eighth season and I binged the shit out of it for two weeks until I was caught up. By the time I was caught up I was CERTAIN there were some feelings between them and I LOVED it. I am bisexual and I was ECSTATIC for a potential queer relationship between two masculine-portrayed dudes. I went on tumblr to express my newfound theory, only to find out that this was a real THING. “Destiel” was already an idea that had absolutely and intensely BLOSSOMED in the fandom  for several seasons already. So many others saw what I saw and saw the potential of emotionally tortured/constipated “daddy’s blunt instrument” dean and the unfeeling daddy’s boy cas “crack in his chassis” Winchester being allowed to be happy together. I felt validated and hopeful. For a while.

Then it was season after season of hopefulness for them to be finally happy with each other while still fighting the ills of their world with sam and the other new members of their family that were added along the way, only to constantly have that hope seemingly teased away at the end every single time. By season 11 and the introduction of amara (not bashing, eventually loved her character and her development too) I gave up. I lost hope. I stopped watching the show. I didn’t want to keep watching my two favourite characters continuously abused by the story they were thrown into.

I know not everyone likes destiel, not everyone thought it was real. That’s chill, idc. Stories are so often meant to be (and sometimes inadvertently) left up to interpretation by the person experiencing and consuming them. It’s what’s so amazing about books and shows and movies that are able to make us feel so intensely about them and their characters. And I felt SO strongly about dean and cas. It was honestly really upsetting to me, the way the show was going with their relationship.

A while later season 13 had been going on and I started seeing some things pop up on my dash. Hopeful things. I did a bit of research and accidentally saw THE SCENE from season 12 and I couldn’t help myself. I restarted it. I watched the whole thing from the beginning again AND introduced it to my boyfriend I think partially as a way to ensure I wasn’t imagining shit (it took him awhile and a lot of me internally screaming during many scenes but by season 9 he was like “uh are they in gay love”). Fast forward to me finally catching up as season 14 was starting. I was still hopeful, somehow. And it happened AGAIN. Season 14 and the beginnings of 15 made me so sad. I HATED what they did with their relationship. I HATED the way it ended. I HATED the way dean treated cas and everyone around him. It felt like the show was taking his whole character arc back to day 1. I didn’t understand. I kept watching for a couple episodes after the big argument and cas left but the luster was gone and eventually I just stopped.

I love this show. It has meant so much to me as a story. So many of the characters are/were very dear to me. I know it’s a running joke with this show about character deaths and homophobia but the strength of the bond I felt was between cas and dean gave me a lot of hope. But it wasn’t enough. I felt betrayed one too many times. And for those of you who kept watching, for whatever reason, I don’t hold it against you. It’s still a beautiful and interesting story without cas and dean’s relationship. But I just personally couldn’t do it anymore.

I hadn’t planned on watching the rest of season 15 when it came back after pandemic hiatus, at least not for awhile. So imagine my FUCKING surprise when I was doom scrolling through twitter during election week on Thursday and I see supernatural trending right along with election shit.

What.

I couldn’t stop myself, I looked and literally SCREAMED and made my boyfriend spill his wine all over our couch. I didn’t know exactly what happened as I hadn’t seen the episode but APPARENTLY all my emotions and feelings had been at least partially vindicated. So I BOUGHT season 15 so I could finish watching where I had left off. I watched 8 episodes in less than 24hrs (don’t judge me there’s a quarantine) and I LIKED them. And it might’ve been bc I knew what was about to happen in 15 x18 but I really felt like the show was getting STRONGER as it neared its finish.

I was so excited for 15x19. I read so many posts from fellow fans, destiel and antis alike. There really weren’t a lot of bad emotions running around. Everyone seemed hopeful and excited like me.

I probably don’t need to go over 15x19 emotions but im going to anyway. I was disappointed. I was confused. I was angry. we are in season 15. The last season ever for this show that has had a HUGE following of fans who have loved it, sometimes unconditionally, sometimes even though it wasn’t the best (and sometimes less than good). A season and show that had just announced YES. CAS LOVES DEAN. ITS REAL. And I shouldn’t have to go over the nuances of why we would expect more after this, with two episodes to go before the show is done forever.

But I will bc im mad af.

Like I said in the beginning. Dean’s character arc has been incredible. His emotional growth – as subtle as it might’ve seemed – has been amazing. And dean has always been an emotional, loving person. he just felt like he wasn’t because the world made him feel that way. And that’s sad, y’all. Dean deserves to realize he DESERVES happiness. And in 15x18, we were finally heading basically directly there. With destiel, yes, but even if you’re anti, what cas said to dean about who he is and why he loves him obviously struck a fucking chord with dean. It obviously changed the way he viewed himself (RE: “that’s not who I am, that’s not who we are”).

But for WHATEVER reason that’s ALL we got in 15x19. One fucking SENTENCE about dean realizing maybe he’s not just built to kill people. And then jack leaves without a single mention of Eileen or cas or Charlie or literally anyone they ever cared about and dean rode off into the sunset alone with his brother while we watched a fucking FIVE MINUTE MONTAGE that made me want to hurl my own body into the sun they were driving toward. And cas is STILL DEAD.

BUT THERE’S STILL ONE EPISODE LEFT AND FUCK ME IF I HAVENT BEEN PAINTING ON MY CLOWN MAKEUP ALL WEEK. SO WHAT DO I WANT????

ONE: DEAN DESERVES HAPPINESS. REAL HAPPINESS. What the FUCK supernatural??? Wasn’t this the whole point of his arc??? And don’t get me wrong I REALLY want that happiness to come from Cas and a real spoken relationship of some sort between them bc it also ties in with my second point but tbh just PLEASE let dean be happy. Dean is a loving person and does everything for love as we JUST FOUND OUT. Dean would NOT be happy with everyone he’s ever loved gone for the rest of his life. I just don’t believe that’s fucking true. h elp him pls.

TWO: CAS DESERVES HAPPINESS. I know we got this whole speech about “happiness isn’t in the having it’s simply in being”  but like. Really. Castiel was supposed to be a throwaway character no one was supposed to care about. But we all cared SO MUCH that he lasted 11 SEASONS longer than intended and became a main character and an integral part of the story. Cas has arguably sacrificed more than anyone on this show. His last act was to sacrifice his life to save the man he loved. He knew where he was going. He knew he was finally going to be able to tell dean he loved him and then immediately be taken by the empty where we know now thanks to season 15 that everyone in there just gets to dream forever about their regrets and sadness. HOW IS THAT FAIR. HOW IS THAT A GOOD ENDING FOR CAS. HOW DO YOU EXPECT ANYONE – CHARACTERS AND FANS ALIKE –TO BE HAPPY ABOUT THAT. Its messed up, supernatural. Y’all KNOW it is and I hope to HIGH HEAVENS this is going to be corrected in 15x20.

THREE: give sam Eileen back. 

Well that’s all I’ve got in me, folks. I’m absolutely and intensely dreading Thursday. Im scared and nervous and obviously still angry that this is absolutely going to be the opposite of what they promised – another “game of thrones” ending. Some of y’all are giving me hope with your posts about maybe they’re trying to keep the ending a surprise and maybe cas is coming back and how can they not and why else would they have done the second to last episode like that and I hope yall are right.

Either way, im glad I am not alone with my feelings. Thanks yall for the experience of this fandom and show. Let’s stick together on Thursday, no matter our differences.

 PS stop calling jensen ackles a homophobe or ill hex you. 

[deluxinn-works]

[Ever Since Then] Chapter 1-9

【Chapter One: The one who I wanted】

Adelyn successfully escaped from the ski trip.

She softly sat down in the subway and breathed a sigh of relief.

It was sad that she had to miss such a big event, but witnessing the one she wanted laughing with her rival would’ve been even more tragic.

Or so she felt.

Her only lament was knowing the disappointment everyone would have of her since she backed out at the last second.

But there was nothing left she could’ve done at that moment, so she gave up.

The sorrow was her lullaby, and it would’ve led her all the way home.

Martin, however, didn’t let that happen.

Adelyn momentarily opened her eyes and saw him standing there with eyes of melancholy, whilst her eyes filled with agitation.

“Of course the one who I wanted to see the least is the one who shows up. What are you doing here?” she questioned.

“I could ask you the same thing. You looked forward to this trip more than anyone else, so I don’t get it. Why are you on the train back home?” replied Martin.

She looked away with dull eyes.

He stared for a minute then realized an eternity could pass and she still wouldn’t have responded.

So, instead, he took a seat next to her.

“I can’t go back without you. It just won’t feel right.” he said.

“…Are you trying to guilt trip me or something?”

“No, not at all. I just can’t believe the class would have fun without you around. I also don’t believe it’d be right to leave you alone now that I know you clearly wish you didn’t leave.”

“And what makes you so sure?”

“Well… If you took pleasure in ditching us, you would’ve been doing something along the lines of happily snickering or dining at a restaurant, not… Scowling.”

“You haven’t stopped to think that maybe you’re the reason of that scowl?”

“I have, actually. Not for now, though. But for before.”

Adelyn’s eyebrow twitched, and Martin knew he was spot on.

“Aren’t you just the knight in shining armor? Just assuming that people who are alone hate the isolation.” she said in attempt to change the subject.

“There’s nothing wrong with some alone time, but there’s a difference between preferring to have no company and having something preventing you from company. Something like jealousy.”

“It looks like you don’t have to wonder why I hate you anymore because now you’ll know. It’s because you think you know me.”

“Really? I think you hate me because I know you too well.”

“Enlighten me, then. What could I possibly be jealous of?”

“That I was with Winter. The fact that she and I happened to be in the same group bothered you. Before the grouping period, you were just fine.”

Adelyn felt her stomache drop.

She figured that her secret was out.

She felt betrayed.

“Then, why did you ask me why I left if you knew?” she asked.

Martin shyly looked away.

“I just can’t give myself too much credit.” he said.

“To be fair, I thought I hid it well. Giving yourself a little credit wouldn’t hurt.”

“No, I mean… I just can’t believe anyone would actually like me.”

“Like you? What are you talking about, Martin? You know I like-”

Adelyn paused.

Then her face got red with embarassment.

He didn’t know her secret.

But she gave it away.

The two made wide eye contact for a few seconds then slowly turned away.

“Arriving at Dasdun. Dasdun Station.” the transit system said.

As the train doors opened, Martin grabbed Adelyn’s hand and began to run.

“Hey! What the hell are you doing?” yelled Adelyn.

“I was just thinking, you can’t think Winter’s going to wait for you forever. Besides, it’s already November!”  said Martin.

“I can’t tell if you’re talking about the person or the season!”

“Sure you can! Just read the sentence that’s right above your reply! It’s not that hard!”

“You’re an idiot!”

The two headed to the Northbound platform and barely made it onto the train back to the lodge.

“You should be there. I promise Winter will be happier with you around. She was the one that did her best to convince you to come, after all.”

She finally managed to crack a smile to him.

“I guess, in the end, I should be glad you’re a moron.”

“Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Even though we only spoke a few times before today, you seriously thought I liked you. And… Without that, I would’ve kept believing you were some stuck up jerk. You could’ve left me, but you gave me a chance to spend time with her again. But…. You should’ve seen the look your face after you found out!”

“What?! You mean your face that was as red as Hide in the last episode of New York Ghoul!”

“I-I’ll show you red!” she yelled as she pulled on his cheeks.

Ever since then, she knew he was her best friend.

【Chapter Two: Falling for you】

“Huh, Adelyn? Where’s Martin?” asked Estelle, not aware of Adelyn’s hour long absence.

“He was insistent in joining the group I was in. Must’ve really wanted to ski with Jaime or something.” she replied.

Of course, this was planned by Martin and herself a few minutes before their arrival. It took him a while, but Martin had finally convinced Adelyn a second time to be brave when it came to Winter.

“Oh I see… So he wants to ditch us for the beginner’s group, huh?” smiled Winter.

“Beginner..?” asked Adelyn.

“Yeah. Don’t you remember? We were split into three groups: Intermediate, Casual, and Beginner. This group being intermediate.” said Estelle.

“Dammit! That lil sackbag used me!” Adelyn thought.

Martin sneezed. After he regained his composure, he graced his eyes upon the bunny hill.

“It still looks pretty damn scary for a beginner’s course.” shivered Jaime.

“Don’t worry man. The trick to not falling is to never stand up in the first place.” said Martin.

“You mean like squatting your ass down on the skis?”

“Yeah.”

“Uhh, that’s missing out on the experience. What’s the point of that?”

“To not wipe out like the dinosaurs.”

Winter and Adelyn stood atop of the intermediate mountain.

“I’m probably not ready for this, Winter. I mean, this is the first time I’ve ever worn skis.”

“I know, Adelyn. Don’t worry. It may look kind of intimidating, but it’s actually the same as the bunny hill. The only difference is that there’s trees and multiple paths downward”

“You mean multiple ways our bones can break while falling down.”

Winter gave a warm laugh.

“That can happen, yes. Even for me. But if it’s falling for you I doubt I’d mind since with every moment of pain there’s a moment of experience to learn from.”

Adelyn’s face beamed and, without her noticing, subconsciously took a step forward and began the downhill journey.

“Oh, shit! Winter! What’s the ‘I wanna freaking stop going downhill’ maneuver?!” yelled Adelyn.

“No! You don’t want to stop too abruptly! Try slowing down first!” Winter shouted back.

“Okay, what’s the slow down maneuver?!”

Winter took a deep breath.

“Hold on!”

She sped down the hill to catch up with Adelyn, and she did it with much grace and such speed.

When the two finally met, they grabbed each other’s hands and they started to slow down.

“Not bad for your first time, Adelyn.” said Winter.

“You too, er, I mean…”

The two shared a gaze for a moment.

After a few seconds, a squat skiing Martin crashed into Winter, causing her to flip twice in the air then roll down the hill.

“What’re you doing?!” screamed Adelyn.

“Losing control! I never thought skiing like this would be so difficult! I also never thought the bunny hill was connected to the intermediate one! Like that just makes no-”

Before he could finish his sentence, Martin crashed into a tree.

In the distance, Adelyn saw Jaime also making his way from the bunny hill to the mountain.

“Ahhhh, Adelyn!” he cried.

He tried to grab onto Adelyn to stop himself from falling, but she dodged, causing him to trip. As a result, though, she slipped on his back and began sliding down the hill while dragging him on her ski.

“Oh God! This hurts a lot more than you think it does, yo!” yelled Jaime.

“You shouldn’t have tried to grab me! What would’ve that done, huh? This would’ve happened anyway, with my head on the snow and all!” replied Adelyn.

The two of them kept tumbling until eventually they flew up a few feet into the air.  

It was then that Estelle showed up and opened up her arms.

“It’s alright! I’ll catch the both of you and then we’ll-”

And before she finished her sentence, they crashed into her and the three shot down straight to the bottom.

【Chapter Three: After you win】

“I’m really sorry. I thought I’d be able to catch the both of you… I have been working on my upper body strength after all.” said Estelle.

“I think you’d require a lot more than that to catch a falling boulder, but…” replied Adelyn.

“Look at all of you so beat up and stuff. As for me? I haven’t got a scratch on me. Oh, a splinter.” Martin said as he pulled out one of the fifty pieces of wood in his forehead.

“I think most of this happened because of you, but…” Adelyn once again replied.

“Yeah, I wish I were more like you, Martin. I’m still working on my balancing. I mean I can’t even do it when it comes to chemical equations either.” sighed Jaime.

“I think those two things are completely different, BUT…!”

“Hey, we can’t be too hard on ourselves. On the bright side, Martin taught me that back flips are a lot less painful that I thought they’d be. Rolling down a hill on the other hand… Well, anyway! With every moment of pain there’s a moment of experience to learn from!” Winter said.

“Then he’s gonna get a full lecture today!” angrily said Adelyn as she pulled Martin from the splinter in his head.

His eyes teared up from the pain of getting dragged from the piece of wood. After the two of them were alone, Adelyn harshly pushed him to the side then began to scold him.

“I thought you were good at skiing! What’s the big idea?!”

“I am good at skiing! But squat skiing’s a new thing for me, so can’t expect a guy to master something that difficult so quickly. Like shuffling, you’re either really bad at it or really good at it, there’s like no in between.”

“Remember when I said I was glad you’re a moron? I think I take that back.”

“Good, because now you’ll be glad to see my genius side.”

“….I’m not sure I follow.”

“That’s also good, because you’re not gonna follow, you’re gonna lead. You see Winter all cold and stuff over there? Now’s a great time to grab her some hot chocolate. I think she’d really appreciate it. Oh and everyone else unless you wanna be all suspicious, which you already are, by the way, since we’re talking right in front of the bathrooms.”

“You trying to get a free hot chocolate off of me?”

“Ye- no.”

“You’re like Aizen or something. I bet me transferring to this school was your idea too. Ugh, I could’ve still been having skiing lessons with her if it weren’t for you.”

“A lesson on death mountain? Iiiii think you already learned that one. Look, I’m sorry about losing control on my squat ski crusade. I didn’t mean to interrupt the both of you, but with one closed door, another one opens.”

“In haunted houses, maybe.”

“And ski lodges. Look around you. It’s warm and cozy, and hey there’s even a fireplace. Wait no, that’s just a flat screen with a heater beside it. Anyways, I think it’s better to have more of a intimate environment when it comes to doing confessions.”

“Confession?! I don’t want to do that yet! I… I just want to get closer to her, that’s all.”

“You could get closer to her after the fact.”

“Why? I mean, it’s not like I have to rush into things.”

“Adelyn, how long has passed since you met her and she still doesn’t know? You could tell yourself you’ll do it someday, but that’s a fancy way of saying you’ll do it never. If you take the time we have while we’re young for granted, you might regret it. I won’t have any time rewinding powers either, so you gotta decide for sure whether or not you want to go another day keeping her oblivious.”

“I guess. But what will I do when I get rejected?”

“You don’t have to be scared of not having hundreds of chapters to delay an inevitable confession. This isn’t Hina Love or koiNise! Readers love when all the filler’s cut out, trust me. You won’t get rejected.”

“How do you know?”

“Because I’d date you. She can’t say she wouldn’t date you.”

“Yeah, you’d date me if I were into dicks.”

Martin couldn’t tell if she was talking about genitalia or the type of person. Or both.

After pondering for a moment, he continued the conversation.

“Anyway, you can practice on me. Come on, pretend I’m Winter.”

“Psh. You’re barely Autumn.”

“I-is that a compliment?”

“No it’s not a goddamn compliment!”

“I was mimicking Winter just then because I thought the ‘what if’ scenario already started. Was that seriously what you would’ve said to her?”

“I am so done.”

“Wait! You didn’t tell pretend Winter you like her yet!”

“I’m not gonna tell Winter I like her!”

As Adelyn’s sentence left her mouth, Winter walked into the hallway that led to the bathrooms.

Martin and Adelyn shared shocked expressions and huddled together.

“Quick, help me think of something to play it off!”

“Don’t play it off! Now’s your chance to be honest and just let it out in the open! You can talk to me again after you win! Not many stories continue after the main couple get together, so maybe you can make this one an exception!”

“W-wait, I can’t!”

Winter noticed the both of them and decided to let them know she was there.

“So this is where the both of you were hanging out. Come on, we ordered hot chocolate already. It’ll get cold if you don’t hurry back.” she said lovingly.

“Oh shit. The hot chocolate plan failed like me in math class.” thought Martin.

“Yeah, no kidding! What are we going to do now, order bagels?!” thought Adelyn.

“Wait, I’m thinking this in my head right now! How’d you reply to me, Adelyn?”

“I took your advice and read the text above my sentences!”

“If it’s bagels you want, we ordered those too.” said Winter out loud.

“So she could read our minds toooooooo?!!!” they thought in unison.

Adelyn took a deep breath and began to speak.

“A-about that sentence I said earlier that you heard…”

“Sentence I heard?”

“…I! I meant it! I’ve been in lo- li- lo- like with you since a few days after we met!”

Adelyn was completely flustered. She wanted to turn to Martin so that he’d give a thumbs up of encouragement, but he was gone.

【Chapter Four: The coolest person 】

“That asshole ditched me!” thought Adelyn.

Winter had a calm expression but her face was as red as Rudolph. Rudolph himself, not just his nose.

“Wow…. I don’t know what to say! I mean, I always thought you were the coolest person who ever spoke to me. So, hearing you say this makes me really happy!” said Winter.

“Coolest person? Me? Noo no! W-wouldn’t that be you?”

“Ohh, I got you! Is that a joke about my name?”

“No, but it is a joke about how you tumbled down the mountain.”

Adelyn stuck her tongue out then turned away. It was the first time she felt truly comfortable with casually speaking with Winter.

“Let’s go out!” Winter said with a smile.

“Wait, what’d you say?”

“I said we should go out with each other!”

“You’re not going to reject me and say you want to know me better first? B-but the first time we like spoke spoke was when you convinced me to go on this trip.”

“No… To be honest, the only reason I haven’t developed feelings for you yet is because I didn’t expect someone as cool as you to like me. But now that I do, I don’t want to let go of that, you know? And I’d be happy to get to know you more, so let’s go out with each other!”

Adelyn tried to keep eye contact with Winter but was too flustered.

“I’d be happy to.” she managed to reply.

The two began to walk back to the lodge cafe to rejoin the others.

“So, about us… Do you think we should tell everyone or should we just-”

Before Adelyn could finish, Winter saw their friends and said:

“Hey guys! Adelyn and I are dating!”

Adelyn made an almost inaudible squeal.

Winter looked over and saw that Adelyn was caught off guard with the announcement.

“Sorry! I was excited and I wanted to let them know. I could say I was just kidding if you-”

Before Winter could finish her sentence, Adelyn held Winter’s wrist and shook her head.

“It’s okay, Winter. I want to tell them too. I just didn’t expect you to do it like that.” she said while smiling.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make it look like I’m showing us off. Alright, let’s go tell them together!” Winter replied happily.

The two sat down with their friends and let them know of their new status together.

Everyone was excited for them and they held a toast to celebrate. After a good thirty minutes, they returned to the ski lifts and spent time together till it was time to head home.

Jaime and Winter lived near each other, so they took the same bus home. Estelle got picked up earlier at the lodge by her mom. So, that left Martin and Adelyn.

“Why did you ditch me at the most crucial moment, you jerk?” asked Adelyn.

“I didn’t need to be there. It was your special moment, right? You’re dating her, not ‘us’ dating her.” Martin replied.

Adelyn raised her eyebrow then changed the subject.

“Speaking of… How did you know she’d say yes? Are you from the future? You did mention something about rewinding time.”

“If I were from the future, don’t you think I’d change the part where I crashed into a tree?”

“I thought you didn’t have a scratch on you.”

“Yeah, I didn’t have A scratch on me, I had like a million.”

“Hm… Okay, then you’re not my imagination either, right? You seem to be too supportive to me and I didn’t even notice when you left.”

“Imagination? This isn’t Might Club. And I’d be worried if your attention was on me during your own confession.”

“Curious. But I still don’t believe you. Tell me something I don’t know.”

“What? Okay… Uh, a cat’s penis is like a hook.”

“That’s disgusting. Why would you say that? But yeah, I already knew that. Tell me something else.”

“Um… There’s a place called Eromanga located in Australia.”

“Woah, really? That’s actually kinda funny! I didn’t know that one, I guess that means you’re real.”

“Of course I’m real! How else was Winter gonna back flip like that?”

“Practice makes perfect.”

“Mm, yeah that was a pretty perfect moment, I can’t argue with that.”

The two paused then shared a laugh as their train drew closer and closer.

【Chapter Five: Self defense】

“Hey, we should take some self defense classes.” Adelyn suggested to Martin.

“Sounds like fun. Which styles were you thinking?” he replied.

“Hm. Karate, Tae Kwon Do, Jujutsu…”

“Everyone learns those. We should try something unexpected… like Drunken Fist.”

“You mean try sitting your ass in jail.”

“No, I’m serious. I mean there’s gotta be countless assholes who recognize the usual styles so they’d know how to counter us. We gotta be the hipsters of combat in order to survive.”

“Okay… Why don’t you suggest something other than the Drunken Fist?”

“If you say so. Hmm, I know, what about Muay Thai?”

“We’re learning self defense, not how to kill someone.”

“Muay Thai wasn’t designed to kill! Nothing is.”

“Then explain guns, dude.”

“Guns could just be a device that emits a loud noise to warn people that they’re about to get shot by a gun.”

“Yeah, I’m not sure that’s the best example to help your case.”

“Trust me, the best defense is a good offense. Not a great offense though, that’d be too offensive.”

“Okay, fine. We’ll look for a place that teaches Muay Thai.”

“And if we don’t find one, we could always use ThouTube.”

Adelyn narrowed her eyes and glared at Martin.

“You better show up to every class.” she said.

“I will. Unless I have homework- Oh, who am I kidding? I never do school work anyways.” he replied.

Adelyn sighed in response.

“Hey, don’t worry. This whole thing was my idea, I wouldn’t ditch it after all this.”

“You mean our idea. The killing stance was your idea, and self defense was mine, so our idea.”

“Alright. Our idea.” Martin happily agreed.

Thus marked the first activity they have committed to together.

【Chapter Six: Our bar date that’s probably not a disaster】

“So… We’ve been on a couple dates now, right?”

Adelyn took a couple sips of her mojito before she nodded and replied with a “Mhmm.”

“Well, not that I’m counting but it’s been about 2 years, 7 months, and 10 days since our last appearance together so I was wondering… Is why you brought us to a Barcade? To change it up for the reader’s lost time?” asked Winter.

The glass in Adelyn’s hands that was once a steady fellow became more akin to a person at a club, judging from the way it was shaking.

“No! W-Who would care about those two people anyways? Because I do, a lot and I appreciate them but I’ve just been busy with learning Muay Thai that I’ve wanted to become a bit more spicy. You know, pick you up in this bar because I can’t do it physically.”  

Winter stopped her laughter so fast that it sounded like a sneeze.

Though that and Adelyn’s words to made it impossible to suppress the rest of it and let out bursts one after the other.  

“You’re too adorable. You picked me up once already Adelyn. I think you can do it again.” she said while moving closer to Adelyn’s side.

Oh God. I might’ve confessed to her first but I swear I’m not a top. I’m not a top. I’m not a top! thought Adelyn.

“Oh yeah! Totally! All me…!”

Adelyn said that in a convincing voice by the way.

Winter put her hand on Adelyn’s shoulder then slowly slid it down to her hand, interlocking their fingers in the process.

“Let’s see what kind of spicy things we can do here then, shall we?”

I don’t need to be a top.

The two noticed some sort of special event happening at one of the motion sensing game cabinets.

“Come beat me and my partner at TekkSoulStreetVirtuaMortalFighter to get five rounds of shots on the house!”

It was one of the managers with his buddies. Apparently they’ve been beating customers left and right with their incredible skills of getting motion detected.

However, Winter knew she and her girlfriend also have skills of motion. Spicy skills of motion, one might say.

“Alright! We’re gonna kick the ass of the manager and get shot up because of it!” said Adelyn.

Wow that sounds really bad without context she thought.

“Oh yeah?! Just try it! My brother’s aunt’s sister’s nephew’s roommate’s online friend’s cat’s dad’s owner’s made this game and I’m not about to let some awesome paying customer take that away from me!”

“Defeating you won’t take away that fact dude but we will beat you anyway!” challenged Winter.

The four players took their stand at the cabinets and were ready to pick some brass.

A referee began to speak.

“Now the rules are simple. Each character looks different but is exactly the same. They have the same movesets, same specials, hitboxes, et cetera. It’s poetic, really. Just like in this game, we all look different on the outside but are the same in the inside. Amen.”

“Yo why’s a priest the ref?” asked a viewer.

“I don’t know.” said Chris Evans.

The players had a few seconds to check the controls, so Adelyn did what any first timer would do. She flipped the bird. It buffed her character with something called BDE.

“Oh hey, check that out! It’s really radiating with the veiny aura and stuff!” she said.

“Very sexy hot and/or mild! Now let’s flank em!” yelled Winter.

But unbeknownst to them, the manager and his buddy already got the drop on them!

The two made punching motions at their screen which one could probably imagine what happened in the game… It made them kick Adelyn and Winter’s avatars over and over!

“Shit! They did the move where our HP bars go down a little bit!”

“Don’t worry, I have a plan!”

Winter copied the middle finger gesture with both her hands, giving the two of them massive buffs of BDE.

“Wow! She’s going even further beyond?!” asked a hyped customer.

The buff was making their HP heal faster than they were getting damage… No… It made their HP bar grow even bigger than the screen!

“Christ! I didn’t even know that was a feature! But it won’t be enough!” said the manager.

The combo stun locked Winter, making the extra health pointless.

Dammit. Is there nothing I could do…? Wait…

Adelyn noticed something about the base combo.

“Winter! Try moving after the third hit!”

“Okay!”

Winter took the first two kicks of the combo then was able to dodge the third, just like Adelyn advised!

“What the funk?!” yelled the manager’s friend.

“I know the secret of the combo. You’re done!”

Adelyn did a quick kick then stopped. After a half second, she did another one. And another one. The ultimate technique has been discovered: The first hit is a stun! Using only the first attack without triggering a combo allowed the 『True Stun Lock』 to be used!

Winter joined in, making it impossible for their opponents to move, even in real life!

“And the winner is Adelyn and Winter!” announced the priest.

The crowd chanted their names and ordered more shots of their own to celebrate the hype.

“Wow, that was quite the game. I learn new things everyday. Hey, I’d love for you guys to be regulars here. It’s been a while since we’ve got crowds this excited.” said the manager.

Winter looked at Adelyn and smiled. She nodded back.

“Sure. I think we had a lot of fun too.” said Winter.

The rounds of shots just arrived at the bar.

“And I think it’s about to get a lot more interesting.” Adelyn smirked.

【Chapter Seven: Leg muscles】

Adelyn noticed Estelle heavily panting as she struggled to make her way down the hall.

“Woah. You’re looking… Energetic.” Adelyn said.

“Adelyn! Help me!” said Estelle as she fell face down.

“The nurse’s office is right there. You can make it. I believe in you.”

Estelle instantly got up and put her hands on Adelyn’s shoulders.

“Do you remember what you said at the ski trip? I took it to heart!”

“Umm.. What’d I say again?”

“That it’d take a lot more than upper body strength to catch a boulder.”

“Oh-”

“…But now I know! It was leg muscles that I lacked! So I leg pressed 500 pounds for like 40 minutes just now!”

“Now that’s hefty.”

“It sucks now since I could barely crawl. It’s like the opening to Metal Gear Solid V!”

“Yeah, maybe. Though unlike that game, you’re looking like a finished project so let’s get you to that office, ‘kay?”

Adelyn looked around for a second then squatted down reluctantly.

“Come on. We’re doing the anime thing where I carry you to to the infirmary then we have some deep talk.” said Adelyn.

Estelle’s eyes lit up as she hopped on her back.

The two made their way into the office and Estelle was dropped gently on one of the beds. Not even a second after, Adelyn made her way towards the door.

“Marianas Trench.” said Estelle.

“Huh?”

“You said we were gonna have deep talk so I said Marianas Trench.”

Adelyn turned around to hide her smile.

“Not that kind of deep. Though yeah some of their songs get sorta deep.”

Estelle was different though. She couldn’t hide her joy from Adelyn.

She was glad that they got a chance to talk a little more.

“I’ll catch you next time for sure, Adelyn.”

Adelyn nodded and waved as she exited the room.

“I’m counting on it.”

【Chapter Eight: Two years】

“Yo dude. Am I really the right one for Winter?” asked Adelyn.

“We had a two year gap in chapters and you’re only wondering this now?” Martin asked in reply.

“I mean… Yeah. She’s everything I’m not. She’s beautiful, athletic, outgoing…”

“Sounds just like you to me.”

“What? Knowing like some Muay Thai doesn’t count as athletic. Also I don’t really like talking to people if I could help it… And… Did you just call me beautiful?”

“Course I did friend. A Martial Art’s an art and you practice it ergo you are beautiful.”

“Oh. I thought you meant like physically or something.”

“Yeah I meant that too. That’s why I’m not really seeing your point here.”

“The point is I’m just not as composed as she is. I don’t think that I have anything figured out.”

“And you think that she does?”

“Of course I do. Haven’t you seen her?”

“A couple of times I think. Yeah.”

“I don’t know… It just seems that nothing phases her. Everything we do, she’s just so knowledgeable and good at it. I just seem to screw up at everything I do. Even the simple things. Like… Did you know I didn’t even know how to tie a knot till like a couple years ago?”

“I did not know that. But everyone experiences shit at different times anyway. Look at me, I haven’t still haven’t done the fuck word with anyone but that’s just cuz It’s Not The Right Time by Daichi Miura.”

“Well that’s almost the song title.”

“It’s been like a two year hiatus. You don’t think Winter would’ve moved on by now if that’s how she felt? She chose to commit to you. Even if other people are into her, even if she found herself attracted to someone else, she’ll say fuck all that and choose you. You might have to stop and think that maybe she’s just as flustered when it comes to you sometimes.”

It took a second, but Martin’s words really stuck with Adelyn.

He does have a point. Then instead of wondering why she chose me in spite of my flaws, I will focus on what she does like until it drowns out all my doubts. I’ll give to her as much as she gives me and more. Much much more. This I do swear to both myself and Winter.

“Yeah. You’re right. Even if our story isn’t written for two or three or ten more years, I’ll always be Winter’s. I’ll always… Always commit to her!”

Adelyn made her way to the gym where Winter’s volleyball club activities were held. When she got to the doors, she kicked it open and slid in.

“Winter! You go! Be better than Shoyo Hinata!”

Winter noticed her girlfriend cheering from the side and smiled.

“Sorry! What was that last part? I don’t understand French!”

Ah well we can’t all be anime. Yes.

Adelyn waltzed up to Winter after her match, with a nice red Gatorade to quench her thirst.

“Hello Mon Winter, how was your game?” asked Adelyn.

“It was great! Really inspiring to see the talent we got out here… Even better to see you around. I thought you didn’t like going here.”

“Well… Maybe going anywhere you are is a place I’d like to be. From now on. I mean only if it’s chill.”

Winter was a bit surprised and flattered. You see, deep down, Winter did have the similar doubts about herself. She would often go to Martin for advice just like Adelyn did. Everyday she would ask him if perhaps they were too different for each other. Maybe Adelyn wasn’t attracted to someone whose interests were of going out often or speaking to people on the regular. Perhaps she’d find it exhausting. And yet there Adelyn was, willing to and even voluntarily spending time with Winter in an environment she would probably avoid regularly.

“The things I find myself avoiding aren’t because I don’t like them. It’s because I was scared. Scared of… Being too pathetic or being too boring. Being nothing really. But you helped reach out. I probably won’t be able to be good at everything right away so… If you’re okay with walking me through a couple things, I’m here.” continued Adelyn.

“Yeah. Always.” said Winter.

Winter took a sip from her bottle then set it down. She glanced at Adelyn as she pat the empty space beside her on the bench.

The two found that they were both scanning each other. From their legs, chest, shoulders… Then to their eyes.

Winter looked to the side then back to Adelyn’s eyes nervously.

“It’s just that I’m a bit sweaty, so…” she said softly.

What? Wait… Is this…? Could it be that this is our chance?

After our dates and confession.

After all the doubts and promises.

After our broken bones from a ski trip. And after winning free shots…

Will we finally…?

Adelyn’s shaking hands found their way to Winter’s wrist.

She carefully slid it up to her shoulder to her neck, and finally to her cheek.

“I like you, Winter. I really like you. I’ll always…”

Before she finished her sentence, Adelyn leaned in.

The tips of their noses touched and the both of them let out a small laugh.

Adelyn then chomped Winter’s lower lips then they began making out for an undisclosed amount of time.

It was rad.

【Chapter Nine: The narrative perspective】

The reason I’m having this monologue today is to show that I, Jaime, can also have a chapter dedicated to myself. I’m here to show Winter, Adelyn, and Martin that they can’t have all the screen time to themselves! Uh, sorry… Is screen time the right thing to say? I’m not really sure. I suppose technically yes because this  sure wouldn’t be shown on actual paper unless someone printed this or if we got some sort of publishing deal.

But I digress. While everyone else has been ranking up their Social Links and Confidant levels, I have been doing the important duty of studying academics. Yes. Unlike the rest of them, I actually pay attention in class!

I mean my grades aren’t very good at the moment but it’s still my passion. When you learn about the world and its functions, you’ve already attained the most basic foundations to becoming a great help to the rest of the planet!

And learning about curing all kinds of diseases is especially important to me, because you never know who’d need that kind of help.

“Why are you trying to change the writing style to first person, Jaime?” interrupted someone at the lecture hall entrance.

It was Estelle. She took a running start then jumped from her end to Jaime’s desk, skidding on the edges while avoiding everyone’s school supplies except for Jaime’s. His notebook was the only thing that flew off and burst into flames upon her stopping momentum.

“What the feudal are you doing?!” he asked.

“Oooh, yikes. You might need to grab a new one.” she answered, well sort of.

After the room calmed down a little bit, she took a seat on the desk.

The professor was mad yet impressed with her athleticism so they simply ignored her and continued with their lecture of the selfish gene.

“Nice. They’re still going. Come on, you can borrow my tablet.” Estelle continued.

After she handed it to a slightly fuming Jaime, she took out a small sketchbook of her own.

The hell does she have that for? This isn’t an art class…

Estelle crossed her legs and began to sketch. Every so often, she would pause to stare at the professor. After they were done with a point, she continued to work on her picture.

“And that’s all for today! Be sure to blah blah deadline blah blah homework and blah blah exam!”

Most of the students were surprised that the prof actually said blah blah but continued on with their life.

After the class was mostly empty, Jaime went to pick up his banged up notebook. It was mostly okay in that it resembled old and burnt notebooks from a world war, so he was only mildly upset.

“I’ll email you the notes you took- Oh it’s just an angry emote.” said Estelle as she took back her tablet.

“I didn’t take any. It seemed kind of like a philosophy class this session anyway. So… Why’d you come here again? Did changing up the narrative perspective make you hate me that much?” asked Jaime.

“No.”

She held up her sketchbook to show him what she was drawing.

In the picture was an elephant. It lifted a capybara with its trunk to put it on its back. On the elephant’s back was a bunch of fruit and there were plenty of other animals surrounding them in what seemed to be an oasis. There were so many trees. The lake was enormous.

“I just wanted you to know you’re not the only one. It might be a little different from what you’re used to but yeah, it is what it is. It doesn’t matter who’s there to see us, as long as we see ourselves.” Estelle continued.

Jaime realized her picture really matched up with the lesson. Estelle wasn’t trying to interrupt the lecture. She was there to be by his side… To show him that even if he thought he wasn’t in anyone’s spotlight, he’ll always shine somewhere else.

This narration doesn’t need to be in first person. Because it would be too selfish. The only writing style out there needed is the one that has Estelle, Winter, Adelyn, and Martin too.

[creativeskullcreations]

HTaHHQ Episode 1: First Meetings(part 2)

Okay, so this was originally gonna be a two part thing, but part two ran long so now it's gonna be a three parter! Which is fine, since each "episode" is gonna be it's own little fic anyways, though it does mean a little more time before I can work on Outside again. Shouldn't take too long though, as part three is already written out and just needs edited.

Stacy was vaguely aware that Lydia and Riley could turn their attention to her any moment, but she remained frozen. She stared, with wide eyes, at the space where Riley's puppeteer should've been. Rather than a human, like there should've been, there was instead a strange, wheeled, metal stand. Between the wheels was a joint of some sort, since the stand was tilted forward as Riley leaned over the counter

'WHAT THE SHIT?!' Stacy stared silently, hand resting on the fallen beaker as her heart pounded in her ears. 'Are all of them like this?! Was Mortimer?!' She swallowed thickly. 'What was really on that paper he wanted me to sign?!'

The stand started to tilt back, and Stacy quickly stood up, beaker in hand. Without a word she put it back in place and quickly left the room, shoving her hands into her shorts pockets to keep them from shaking.

Luckily, nobody seemed to have noticed, as they simply restarted the scene without saying anything to her about anything. Taking advantage, she rushed to the bathroom, locking herself in one of the stalls.

'-shitshitshitshitshit-' Was the current commentary going through her head at the moment as she paced in the small space. Her hands covered her mouth to keep the sobs in as tears streamed down her face and she tried to will herself to stop crying. 'I can't! I can't stay here! Oh god...' She sniffed, rubbing at her eyes and sitting on the closed toilet lid. 'I want to go home...'

"Hey! Hey, Human!" Stacy's head snapped up just in time for something to fall on her face. She flinched and it slid off, landing on her lap and giving her a good look at it. It looked like a rather large hand puppet, like the ones given to the guest children at the end of filming. Only this one was moving on it's own, like Riley and, possibly, the others.

"Uh..." Was all Stacy could think of to say. It had snapped her out of... whatever that was, but this was yet another Puppet. Granted, it was certainly more adorable than the others, but still...

"Why are you in here? Shouldn't you be out there, doing Human stuff?" It -she, she had a female voice- asked, "standing" up in her lap. When she started to tip over, Stacy reached out a hand to help keep her steady.

'I felt like I was literally going to die because I discovered you guys have no puppeteers.' Yeah, no. She wasn't going to answer with that. "Well, this is the bathroom, so..."

"Yeah, but you aren't doing bathroom stuff. You're just crying." The Puppet dismissed, and Stacy felt vaguely offended at being called out so bluntly. "Why were you crying, anyways?"

"No reason..." 'That I will ever tell you or anyone ever.' She rubbed at her eyes, trying to get rid of the tears. "Where did you even come from, anyways?"

"The vents." She pointed up, and Stacy looked to see an open vent right above her. She would've said something about it, namely how creepy that was, when the Puppet spoke up again. "Anyways, my name's Scout! What about you?"

"Uh, Stacy. Stacy Al-Stein! Stacy Stein..." She looked back down at Scout. "What were you even doing up there?"

"Escaping, duh!" She then covered her mouth, looking almost sheepish. "Uh, please don't tell anyone, though. I'm not actually supposed to be out here right now."

"Don't worry. Nobody will hear about it from me." The girl promised. 'Not that anyone would even believe me, anyways...'

"Awesome!" The Puppet gave a open-mouthed grin that, in Stacy's opinion, killed any cuteness she had. "I'd still better go, though. Just, like, close your eyes or something."

Stacy did as asked, and felt the light weight vanish. She looked up in time to see the Puppet disappear from sight. '... That was really weird. I kinda hope I see her again before I leave, though...'

Feeling somewhat better, thought not really knowing why, the girl finished up and left the bathroom. Somehow, she felt confident enough to try and finish out the day. And, with any luck, she could convince Mary not to make her come back ever again.

Moving quickly, she managed to find Lydia again. To her relief, nobody seemed to have even noticed she was missing. Thus, she was able to smoothly rejoin Lydia as she led the kids over to the next segment.

"Ah, there you are Stacy!" She was greeted cheerfully. "We're just setting up for the next next segment. Then we've got Daisy's bit, and then it'll be time for lunch."

"Okay..." Stacy helped get the kids in place at the many different easels, making sure everyone had their markers and pads of paper. She paused briefly, staring when she saw Nick Nack helping a girl set up her paper. He was leaning over the table, showing her the proper way to put her pad on the easel. It was almost sweet, watching the usually stuck up Puppet help a kid out.

But knowing what she did now, Stacy found it pretty creepy.

But she ignored it. She helped Lydia make sure everyone had what they needed, and then moved off set so the cameras could get rolling. But even though she wasn't on set, she kept as close an eye as she could on the Puppet without being obvious. Danny was around somewhere, and like hell would she let these things get him.

The segment went as they normally did. The kids drew something and Nick Nack sang some stupid little song about being creative or something. It made Stacy scoff internally. 'I could write a much better song than that. I thought Nick was supposed to have standards.'

"Hey, kid." Lydia leaned in, trying not to be caught by the mic. "Head on over to the kitchen set and help Daisy get set up." Stacy gave her a horrified look, but it was misinterpreted. "Look, I know you're supposed to stick close to me, but she always needs the extra help. So if you could give her that today, I'll make sure she saves some pie for you, okay?"

'It's not like I have much of a choice, do I?!' The girl nodded mutely, and quietly started to sneak over to the proper set. She paused when she reached the edge, the angle allowing her to watch Daisy without being seen herself.

So far, it didn't seem the Puppet was doing anything sinister. She was just "pacing" back and forth behind her counter, setting out ingredients for whatever she would be baking on the segment. Most likely it would be pie, but from what Stacy knew she did occasionally make cake, and at one point she made donuts. She was also humming the theme song as she worked, which made her seem just a little bit more... human. At the very least, it gave Stacy enough courage to actually approach, making sure to make a bit of noise as she did so.

"Oh!" The Puppet jumped as the girl kicked a pen someone had left on the floor, turning to face her. "Well hey there Stacy! I didn't expect to see you here yet."

"Uh, Lydia said that you, y'know, might need help getting set up before all the kids showed up." She couldn't quite keep her voice from shaking, and prayed that it wasn't too obvious. Luckily, the southern belle didn't seem to notice, though Stacy wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

"Well shoot, I sure could. Some of these assistants just put my things far too high on the shelves." She pulled a pad of paper and pen from her apron and scribbled out a quick list. "If you could just get me these out of the storage closet, I'd be ever so grateful." She handed over the list,, which Stacy took with some hesitation. "The closet is right over there, sugar. Shouldn't be too hard to find it."

"Yeah." She said, but Daisy had already moved on, disappearing from sight as she ducked under the counter. It left the girl feeling very much like character from a video-game.  Still, she shook it off and went over to the closet, finding it easily as it said Kitchen Storage on the door.

Entering with only a brief hesitation, she found the entire small room completely unorganized. "Jesus Christ! Did a hurricane come in through here?!" She glanced between the list and the mess piled around her with a heavy sigh. Even though there were only three items on it, she felt her heart sink as she looked around the room. "This is gonna take forever..."

"Stacy!" Came a cry from above, followed by something soft landing on her head. The girl gave a stifled scream as the Hand Puppet from before slid off her head onto a box in front of her.

"Scout?!" She struggled to keep her voice low. "What the hell?!"

"Are you getting stuff for Mom?" The Puppet asked, "hopping" from the box she was on to a lower one.

'... Mom?' Stacy's mind went blank for a moment, trying to figure out the logistics. "Uh..."

"Cause I know where everything is in here." She climbed up onto a set of boxes set up like stairs, ending up at almost eye level with the teen. "Sometimes Bonzai likes to hide stuff, but I always know how to find it. Just tell me what you need!"

"Uh, okay!" Stacy perked up, not one to ignore a miracle when it happened. She looked over the list again to make sure she got it right. "Okay.. First thing she needs is a hand mixer."

"Over there!" Scout pointed to a shelf and Stacy made her way over. Right there, underneath a box meant for a set of mixing bowls was the mixer. She picked it up, then looked at the list again.

"She also needs some measuring spoons, and some sort of special rolling pin, I think." Stacy scratched her head, confused, but Scout nodded.

"I know what you mean! The spoons are in here, and the rolling pin is way up there." Stacy could feel her hopes shatter once again as she looked up at the tall shelf the Puppet pointed to. "But don't worry, I can get it for you. You grab the box of spoons!"

"But-" Stacy looked back, only to find Scout had vanished. "Okay, then." She picked up the box and put the mixer in it. After a moment, she also dropped the list in too, in case Daisy needed to double check.

"Look out!" Stacy caught the falling objects in the box as well, said objects being Scout and the rolling pin. "Awesome catch! Totally saved my life there." She climbed out of the box, and the girl watched in concern as she dropped to the floor.

"Uh, don't you want to, I dunno, come with?" Stacy asked as the Puppet crawled away behind some boxes.

"Nah, I got stuff to do, vents to map out." She answered flippantly as she disappeared from sight. "I'll see you later, though!" Stacy looked behind the box, but couldn't see the Puppet despite there being nowhere she could go.

"Huh..." She chose to ignore that for now and left the closet, not sure if she was leaving or entering the Twilight Zone. She went back over to where Daisy was, hefting the box up onto the counter. "Um, here you go. This is everything you needed, right?" She backed away quickly as Daisy sped over to where she was, rifling through the box.

"Yep, sure is sugar!" She had a beaming smile on her face, but it just made Stacy uncomfortable, so she looked away. "Thank you so much for your help. Now I can get everything all set up before the kids get here."

"No problem..." Stacy muttered, backing up slightly. She watched as Daisy set everything up, unsure of whether to help or not. On the other hand, it felt wrong to simply stand there doing nothing. On the other, well...

Stacy had seen the older episodes of the show. One wrong move, and she was "burnt toast, sliced thinly" as the quote went. So she just stayed back and watched, waiting in case she did need help.

In the end, however, she didn't make a move to help. Not that it mattered much, as soon Lydia had showed up with the kids, and Stacy had her hands full helping get the in their places and sitting still.

"Thank you so much for doing that." The woman muttered as they helped everyone get set up for recording. "Seriously, it's making everything go so much faster."

"No problem..." Stacy said, wondering how much worse things would've been if she hadn't helped. 'It really didn't take that long. Although Scout did help me out. Maybe they should ask her for help next time they need stuff from in there.'

She helped finish getting things set up, then hurried out of the way so they could film the segment. She sat nervously next to Lydia, watching as the kids ran around "helping" Daisy bake a pie while she sang about it. It was all very typical for the kid's show, and Stacy found herself bored again very soon.

"Y'know, after this it'll be lunch time." Lydia whispered when she noticed her fidgeting. "Why don't you head on over to the cafeteria and get something to eat. I'll meet you over there when this is done."

"Are you sure that would be okay?" Stacy questioned. It wasn't that she didn't want to leave, but what Mary or Lydia's boss might say if they saw her just "wandering" around.

"It'll be fine. If anyone complains, just tell them that I sent ya on ahead to save me a seat." The woman told her with a wink and a grin which Stacy hesitantly returned. "It's down that hallway over there, and is the big room with the big windows. You can't miss it!"

"Okay." Stacy went off in the indicated direction, dodging around a few other workers. Nobody said a thing, or even seemed to take notice of her as she made her way down the hall, easily finding the cafeteria. Looking in the large windows, she saw a buffet style set up, not unlike the one at her school. The only difference was that it looked, and smelled, far more appetizing.

She was just about to open it, when she heard voices coming from the room across the hall. Before she had even registered who exactly was talking, she was already making her way over to listen in. Carefully, she opened the door just a crack, then crouched low to look through the opening.

"I can not believe those children! They ruined my set, and refused to listen!" Stacy watched as Riley wheeled back and forth, looking and sounding madder than Stacy would've thought possible for the seemingly nice Puppet. Nick Nack also watched her from where he was leaning against a desk, looking quite bored.

"Riley, please, he knocked over one empty beaker. The new girl even picked it up for you. It's fine." He sounded exasperated, but quickly backed up with an almost fearful expression as the scientist got in his face.

"Shut up you paint covered fool! I value each and every tool!" She shouted, making Nick and even Stacy flinch back. "One day a brat will make a mistake insurance can't cover! This is why I prefer working with children that are older." She hissed out.

"Yes, well, these segments are still integral to the show. The parents love them, more than the kids I think." The artist had recovered quickly, now looking unfazed by the rant. He took a paint brush out of his pocket and examined it, making a show of not looking at his fellow Puppet. "Besides, we're recording the actual story after the humans eat, and you're on first again. So surely you can keep a hold of yourself until then."

Riley just grumbled, crossing her arms. Nick sighed, putting his brush away, and Stacy ducked to the side when he turned to face the scientist and, consequently, the door.

"What do you think of the new girl, anyways?" He asked. "She seems rather shy to me."

Riley scoffed. "It's her first day Nick Nack, and she's being taught by Lydia of all people. Just give her a week, and I'm sure she'll, uh..." Riley trailed off, and Stacy found herself trying to think of what could possibly rhyme with "people".

"Talk yourself into a corner, did you?" He asked smugly, and Stacy looked back to see the absolute smirkiest smirk on his face. Riley was on him instantly, smacking him with both hands.

"Shut up shut up SHUT UP!" She snarled with every hit. "At least I actually try! Not my fault you can't continue the rhymes!"

"Now you wait just a minute there!" The artist snapped as he backed away from her, but anything else he would say Stacy didn't hear, as something - or rather, someone - once again landed on her head. She snapped her head forward and caught Scout as she fell.

"Hi Stacy!" The hand Puppet greeted, a little too loudly for the girl's taste. She felt her heart stop as the argument beyond the door did, and quickly backed away.

"Hey, Scout..." She said quietly as she hurried away. The cafeteria, while not full, did have people in it. Which meant it wasn't a good hiding spot so long as she had Scout with her. Instead she ducked around the corner, hoping the two Puppets wouldn't be curious enough to look very far. Her heart sank when she noticed it was a dead end, but she ignored it for the moment. "What were you up to?"

"Looking for you." The Puppet said. "How'd Mom's part of the show go?"

"Uh, good?" She winced at the questioning tone. "I don't really know, Lydia sent me over here, so I didn't get to see all of it."

"That's too bad." Scout said, then almost deflated as the squeaking of wheels approached. "Oh no."

Stacy felt everything go cold, and started to hold Scout tighter. Her heart pounded, and she backed up as Riley came around the corner with a glare.

"Scout!" She snapped. "We have told you before, during the day you're not to venture beyond your door!"

"Indeed." Nick said as he joined the scientist. Together, they managed to block a good portion of the narrow hallway, blocking any escape. Stacy felt her throat constrict, heartbeat quickening as she realized she was cornered. "You should know better by now."

"But I wasn't seen!" A pause as the small Puppet glanced at the human holding her. "By more than one person. But Stacy's my friend! She's cool with it! Right, Stacy?" Scout looked up, frowning when she gave no answer. "Stacy?"

Pupils shrunk and breathing quick and shallow, the girl was staring straight ahead and clutching the Hand Puppet in an ever tightening grip. It was starting to hurt, actually, and Scout was beginning to worry about her new friend. "Um, Stacy..."

Riley ignored the girl and simply sighed, approaching and reaching for the Puppet. "Enough of this nonsense! It's time to-"

Stacy shrieked, flinging Scout at Nick and catching him in the face. While he stumbled back, scrambling to grab the Hand Puppet, she shoved Riley to the floor and bolted. The three of them watched  as she vanished around the corner, the sound of her footsteps fading fast as she raced away.

"Well." Nick said, holding Scout as he stared after the girl and Riley struggled to pick herself up off the floor. "That was certainly... something." He cleared his throat, desperate to think of what he should do, but nothing came to mind.

"Man, I can't believe you two chased off my only friend!" Scout lamented, interrupting his tumbling thoughts. He stared down at her as she flopped over in his grip in the most over dramatic way possible. "She was so cool! Didn't talk down to me or anything. And now I'm never going to see her again!"

"Er..." He blinked, now even more confused. He wanted his paints back, as at least he understood those. 'Blasted humans, making a mess out of everything. Father, at least, was never this bad!'

"Just help me get off the ground!" Riley demanded, shaking the artist from his thoughts and confusion. "And don't worry about the girl Scout, I'm sure we'll see her around."

"But, not you." Nick told the Hand Puppet as he helped Riley up. "You, I'm sure, will be grounded."

"Boooooooooo!" But Scout didn't complain beyond that, letting Nick haul her back to Daisy's room. Riley, meanwhile went in search of another human. There was a human child now lost somewhere in the studio, and proper procedure was to tell the adults so they could handle it. And Riley wasn't one to ignore proper procedure.

[water-hates-learning]

nobody knew (and nobody knows)

Crossover with The Magnus Archives podcast because this idea has been bothering me for a while now so I finally just wrote it. Whatever. Not my best work.

Mild spoilers for the end of S1 of The Magnus Archives. Takes place after episodes 39/40 of the podcast. Also contains headcanons, lots of swearing, and the implication that the main EW boys don’t follow the standard laws of time and space. Post The End EW time.

In other words, this is bullshit.

-------------------------------------------------------------

"Case number zero-one-one—"

“Six-six-six.”

“Mr. Ritehill, please.”

“Whatever.”

“Statement of Thomas Ritehill, regarding an…unusual trip taken by himself and his companions in January 2007. Statement—” 

“And the shit in 2014.”

“[sigh] Regarding the trip in January 2007 as well as the disturbances on 31st December, 2014. Statement taken direct from subject, 14th November 2016. Interview conducted by Johnathan Sims, Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute, London. Before you begin—why are you just now giving a statement?”

“’Cause a bunch of shit went down and somebody needs to hear about it. M’friends don’t wanna talk about it. And if I have to sit on this bullshit by myself anymore I’ll explode.”

“Right. Erm. Statement begins.”

“…now?”

“Yes, now.”

“[mumbling]…can’ believe you’re using a damn tape recorder…what year is this…[sounds of container being unscrewed]”

“Mr. Ritehill—”

“Call me Tom, god. And let a man have his damn vodka. Holy shitake on a sled, lemme just. Fuck. Okay. So, back in 2007, the four of us were bored, right, and Tord—this is when that commie fuck still lived with us—Tord—”

“Full names, please.”

“Christ, okay. Tord Lesion said we should go to Hell. So we did. Just the tourist route, ya know, got to see our personal hells and shit. Won’t bore you with the details. So yeah, me, Tord Lesion, Edd Golding, and Matt Harvice took an elevator to Hell, had a good time, got some souvenirs, and came back. Whatever.

’Cept when we were leaving the…the devil holding the door for the exit said they’d see me in six months. And it was like, haha, mate, yeah, sure, whatever, funny joke. I didn’t mention it to the guys and I didn’t think about it again. Couple months later, Edd’s digging a hole in the back garden and comes up with this door all covered in symbols ‘n stuff. And we’re all a buncha dumbasses so we go down it. Deal with some Indiana Jones traps, beat off a killer mummy, find a mysterious treasure box—you know the drill. So Tord opens the box and then…I dunno. Everything went dark.

If you ask any of the other three, they’d probably just tell you that I was unconscious. They said there was nothin’ in the treasure chest but I’m pretty sure the jackasses kept it for themselves and didn’t tell me. Probably for the best; I just woulda spent it on alcohol.

Anyway, from my perspective, we fell down a hole. When Tord opened the box, the floor dropped out from underneath us and we fell into darkness. I couldn’t see or hear the others, I was just falling in darkness. Or maybe floating. I dunno. Kinda…felt like forever and no time at all. I know that doesn’t make sense but you lot probably hear shit like that all the time. So I’m floating there and it’s dark, pitch black, but I can still see my hands in front of my face, like there’s a light shining only on me but there isn’t a light. Kinda like how someone looks when they stand in front of a black backdrop; the background’s all dark but they’re, like, normally lit or whatever.

And I wasn’t really scared ‘cause it’s not the weirdest thing that’s happened to me. I was just kind of waiting for something to happen. Because something always happens.

Didn’t have to wait long.

I felt something slide its hands around my neck from behind, felt its fingers on my windpipe, its thumbs at the base of my skull. I kind of expected it to be cold, like icy or something. But they were hot, like someone with a fever, uncomfortable. Made my skin prickle. It said…something. Couldn’t tell you what it was now, only have the vaguest sensation of—of a voice, talking to me, right in my ear, hot breath on my skin. I kept thinking I could see it moving out of the corner of my eye but if I tried to turn my head to look, it would start squeezing my neck until it had cut off my air supply.

Sometimes I think I can remember that it had promised me things. Sometimes I think it might have said something about a fight or a war or something. A lot of the time I pretend the whole thing was because I was blackout drunk. But I know that last bit’s not true because I hadn’t been drinking that night. And I wasn’t too worried because, I mean, weird stuff happens to the four of us all the time, stuff that no one even remembers. We’ve been through…three? Zombie apocalypses now? Hell, Matt’s led one of them. All of us have died and come back to life. And—and the thing is, right, the thing is that no one else remembers it. I’m pretty sure there’s stuff that’s happened that we don’t even remember. Tord said somethin’ once about crossing time lines or some shit but I dunno about any of the string theory, philosophical bullshit.

All I know for sure is, that night, in the black that wasn’t dark, with this thing’s hands around my neck, a demon crawled inside me.

A demon crawled inside me and it lives there and it’s so. Fuckin’ angry. Or maybe I’m angry. I don’t know for sure anymore, it’s been too long.

But—[container unscrews, long pause]—mm, anyway. The thing with its hands on my throat somehow—it somehow pries my mouth open. Gets its fingers between my teeth and wrenches my jaw apart so hard it aches. And then there’s this…this purple thing. It looks darker than the black but it’s purple and maybe that’s just because it’s beyond human comprehension or some shit. Hell if I know. It got closer and closer and for the first time in there I was scared. I was fucking scared and I thought—I don’t know what I thought, all I remember for sure is this—this blinding panic. This kind of raw, mind-numbing terror that made my heart beat so hard it hurt and it was hard to breathe and all I could hear was this rushing sound in my ears as this—this cloudy purple thing got closer and closer. I tried to get away but I couldn’t move, I could only sit there and watch.

And it—it…it just…”

“Mr. Ri—sorry. Tom. Do you need a break? We can take a moment to—”

“No. If I don’t…if I don’t say it now—if I leave this room—I’m not comin’ back. And I gotta get this out. [a deep breath, let out slowly] Just…remembering it now…it still scares the shit outta me.

So this cloud thing…it…crawls inside my mouth. And I can feel it. It tastes like…like how ash smells? Or maybe like someone filled my mouth with ash. And embers. Because it was hot and it didn’t exactly burn, it was just—like that moment when you drink some coffee and it’s still hot but not so hot you burn your tongue but still hot enough you gotta sip it. You know what I mean?

And I can feel it s-sort of wr-wriggling…wriggling and squirming to get inside me and I’m t-trying to push it out with my tongue or—or close my mouth or something. Anything to keep this thing out. B-but it keeps flopping around and pushing itself inside my and I’m—I’m ch-choking on it, gagging, and I think I was crying and trying to scream and this thing—[gagging sound]”

“Tom—”

“N-no, no, stop, shut up, let me just—finish. Okay? Don’t! Don’t fuckin’ touch me! I’m fine! Just let me give my damn statement and get out of this place. It smells like death in here.”

“I…I apologize. Please continue.”

“It went down my throat. I could feel it sliding down my throat, feel it under the fingers of that thing that still held my mouth open. It was lighter than candyfloss but I felt it like I’d swallowed a chunk of bread without chewing it enough. It was gross and it was horrible and it was terrifying and I don’t think I’d wish it on anyone. Even that bastard Tord.

And then it was just…done. The hands were gone, the cloud thing was gone, and I was laying on the couch in our sitting room, gasping at the ceiling. Edd was the only one in there, watching the telly. Said he was too tired to carry to my room and then laughed at me for passing out. Maybe I shoulda said something then, should have told him what had just happened, what I’d seen. But I didn’t. Instead I ran to the bathroom and threw up. And it just never came up again, never had a reason to say anything. I kept getting distracted by things.

I didn’t know what had happened until the end of December, in 2014.

You remember that year? It was really wet. Kept raining but we hardly got any snow. Freezing cold but just…no snow, not really, nothing that really stuck.

Anyway, Edd had been on the roof fixing the satellite dish during a rainstorm. He ended up having another dick measuring contest with one of our neighbors, Eduardo. Um, I dunno his last name, actually. Var…something. Var…there was an “L” in there somewhere. Sorry. Can’t remember. Eduardo had this, like, “alien” satellite or something and I guess it was radioactive or whatever. Anyway, he and Edd both ended up with superpowers for 24 hours and I can see by the look on your face that you think I’m takin’ the piss and I swear to fuck I am not. You can look up the incident report yourself, probably. But I bet the coppers only wrote something about property damage due to gang violence or some bullshit. Might be pictures our there somewhere but I dunno how to find them. I’m afraid I’d see myself if I did.

So Eduardo punched me, like, three blocks. Should have killed me. Instead it just…it felt like something clicked into place. And I remembered that demon that had shoved its way down my throat. It was like it had been waiting for this.

It hurt, that first time.

When your body’s stretching and your muscles are tearing and your skin is warping and your bones are snapping and cracking and breaking into new shapes. It hurts like a son of a bitch. I wanted to die. But mostly I was just angry. I was so fucking angry.

Don’t remember much while I was…changed. Flashes of stuff; tearing through building, smashing cars, attacking Eduardo and Edd. I think I might have ate someone. I try not to think about it.

Eduardo hit me with something, some kind of energy beam, I dunno. Sent me flying and ripped that smoke right out of me. I remember it flying away, remember the feeling of it ripping out of my throat and tearing off into the night.

But whatever it had done was kind of…stuck to me, I guess. I can still turn into a monster. Almost did when Tord showed his damn commie face again and blew our house up. You can look that up too. 27 Durden Lane. Nothing but a crater now.

[a pause, sounds of container unscrewing, another pause, the thud of a fist hitting the table]

And the only fuckin’ reason I’m telling you people this is because—fuck it, you probably already think I’m insane—there’s some kind of big…bad thing on the way. Fuck if I know. Just. I just…feel it. Can smell it. Or something. Taste it like some dry fuckin’ rum in the back of my mouth. Maybe the world’s ending for real this time. Maybe everyone will actually remember it. I don’t know.

But this place fucking stinks like a bunch of rotten bodies, like that musty attic stench with dead bugs everywhere. And you don’t believe a damn word I’m saying because you think I’m just a drunk. Ha. I can’t even get drunk anymore.

Whatever. Believe what you want. We went to Hell and I’ve got demon powers. The end.”

“…right. Um. Is the whole…demon powers the reason why your eyes are like…that?”

“What? No. This is just ‘cause my mum’s a bowling ball. They’re hollow. See?”

“O-oh my god. State—statement ends.”

[click]

“I will admit I am…extremely skeptical of Mister—of Tom’s statement. It sound positively ludicrous, the delusions of a schizophrenic at their worst, I’d even hazard. I’d disregard his statement entirely if not for the visceral reactions he showed to some of his own words—though that only proves that he believes they’re true.

But his eyes…Christ, I’ve never seen anything like that. He could obviously see but they were just. Black pits in his head. Gone. He stuck his fingers in them. Not the worst thing I’ve seen, all things considered, but one of the most…disturbing? Uncomfortable, may be the better word.

Tim was able to find a police report on the incident at 27 Durden Lane on 13th March, 2016. It was written off as an accident but with some additional digging he managed to find…more. The rubble and blast patterns look more like they were caused by external explosions. Tim says it looks like a bomb went off. Or several bombs. The neighbor’s house—the residence of one Eduardo Varela, Markus Barnes, and Jonathan Rees—also sustained serious damage. Jonathan Rees reportedly died at the scene due to serious injury.

Martin managed to dig up a few photos from the incident in 2014. Most of them aren’t the best quality and it’s hard to tell what’s happening except for bright flashes of green. But one very clearly depicts a monstrous shape, as big as a building it looks like, with horns on its head. It’s hard to tell in the photograph but it appears to be purple. There was a reported explosion in a local park around the date Tom Ritehill claims he transformed into a monster, and there is a crater there from the police report. But that’s all the evidence we can find to support his…stories.

We tried to get into contact with Eddward Golding and Matthew Harvice but neither of them were very forthcoming. Edd Golding declined to comment altogether and Matt Harvice was…he was difficult to talk to. It was as if he kept losing his train of thought. I doubt he would make for a reliable source.

There was also an attempt to contact the individual Tord Lesion but none of the information we were able to find was up to date. The only thing Tim managed to scrounge up was an old wanted poster,  several months out of date, with Tord Lesion’s image on it. He appears to be in a military style uniform with a shotgun. If Tom Ritehill’s claims that Tord is starting a personal army are to be believed, then I suppose this would be a reason to trust his word. Maybe.

[sigh] I suppose we could investigate these claims more in the future. Though I am very much inclined to ignore them.

End recording.”

[click]

“Supplemental.

It just occurred to me that it’s been very nearly four months since the incident with Jane Prentiss. This place has been scrubbed within an inch of its life, nearly burned with chemicals, steamed so badly that it made my eyes water with the lingering chemical smell when I finally came back from leave. It’s been so thoroughly cleaned that a blind dog trying to sniff his way out would have run into the walls.

And yet…and yet Thomas claimed he could…he could smell the death. He said…dead bugs. Specifically dead bugs. And decay. And I can’t…stop thinking about those tunnels…and what could still be down there.

…end supplemental.”

[end of tape]

[xenoshadel]

Saving Colors

Context: Rewrite of the ending of episode 9 because fuck that episode where Akira reaches Miki in time. Miki's life was another color in the grey world, one that needed to be saved and Akira hopes they can save more together despite the insanity around them.

Ao3 and perhaps a ko-fi?

“What does it mean to be human?”

A clear question with answers blurred together. Simple words asking to define what came to be impossible, or so it seemed to be with how humanity acted as a whole. Miki heard the question when she ran, and she thought how similar it was to the time someone asked why she ever ran. Humans weren’t meant to run, but it was something she liked to do and it was the thought that maybe—just maybe—moving forward will change something.

To run, to move forward, to be colors in what was otherwise a grey world.

Yet it remained grey the further she ran and heard multiple gunshots behind her. She gritted her teeth, hoping that someone will have an answer to that question and she strained her ears. Maybe someone will have an answer that could also change something and add more colors to the world, if not just clear a bit of the insanity.

“Save Miki Makimura!”

Bang!

Unless those colors were red and yellow, glistening and vibrant from the bodies they left. While those colors were temporary when they stained all around them, the physical bodies were forever lost without a beating heart. Disappearing like rainbows in the sky: once beautiful, but never meant to last long for eyes filled with hate.

“Miko…”

Miki almost choked on her words. The ground became blurry the harder she ran, her feet pounding as she wiped tears with her sleeve. She clenched her hand as she ran, hoping that she can go a little farther—just a little more for her to raise her hand and pass the baton. It was the same run she had always run, where she’d wait until Miko passed the baton and sprint once it’s in her grasp. The race still needed to be finished, she told herself, and determination kept her stride steady.

Bang!

Miki gasped aloud at the sting in her leg. A bullet grazed her thigh and nearly made her lose her balance from the shock, and her stride wobbled when she forced herself to keep running. To keep the baton in her hold had always been her top priority, whether the race was real or not, and she raised her hand when angry shouts behind her grew coherent.

“Akira…!”

Her eyes widened when a van sped down the path and stopped in the distance before her. Miki blinked to see clearer, running faster when she caught sight of Wamu at the passenger seat of the van. She exclaimed happily, and her heart would’ve leaped in joy if it wasn’t for the thud of a fallen body when the door swung open.

A terrified gasp caught in her throat once Wamu’s body toppled from the van and the shouts grew louder, then a few men scrambled out with knives glinting in their hands.

There the world slowed and Miki heard nothing more than the muffle of cries yearning for her blood to spill. She turned around to see the mob catching up to her, and climbing up the hill will only be a race for either side to reach her first. The sting of her leg, the heavy sensation in her hand even when nothing was in her grip, Miki’s scream was silent as she ran and hoped to spread the distance between her and an oncoming man with a knife.

She had to pass the baton… she had to! Empty words she tried to convince herself as she ran, even as she felt the footsteps behind her. Still she didn’t think about the flash of knives all around her nor the insanity, but the only person that helped her run.

“Miki!”

A break in what felt like a fuzzy world and Miki glanced around, only to have the wind knocked out of her when a force crashed into her body. Little breath to scream or to thrash around, but the shouts resounded and her feet suddenly felt lighter.

“There’s the devil!”

“After him!”

Fur tickled her nose and gunshots rattled her thoughts, and while all resumed to chaos around her, Miki heard a low “hang on” when a large arm held her body. Realization then hit her after a member of the mob cursed at them.

“He’s got the witch!! Shoot them down!”

More gunshots came to life and Akira winced when he jumped over the hill, keeping his body low to run with a careful hold on Miki. Headlights flashed from the oncoming cars but couldn’t outshine the crowd of angry eyes. If hate fueled their bodies, then they were no different from the corpses they stepped over and fired at the one who saved more lives than them.

Feet pounding against the gravel, the buildings towering over him, no other life seemed to breathe in this part of the city. Miki shuffled and turned her head to look up at Akira. “Akira!”

“Miki… are you alright?”

He jumped over a damaged car and widened his eyes when Miki gasped after his landing. Quickly glancing at their surroundings—and hoping the shadows will remain empty—Akira halted his sprint and gently brought her to the ground. He noticed blood on her left leg and Miki nearly fell forward when she put weight on both legs, her hands clasping onto Akira’s when he caught her.

“You were shot?” he asked, his words soft in horror.

“I’ll be okay, Akira,” Miki said. Her shaking voice didn’t convince him, but she still mustered a smile when she looked up at him. “So this is what you really look like as a… devilman.”

He cracked a small smile back. “Yeah, this is my body but my heart is still human and mine. And”—he crouched down—“I’ll need you to ride me until we get out of this part of the city.”

Green eyes curiously glanced at the flutter of wings on his head and Miki nodded, her hands still holding onto Akira as he guided her to sit on his back. She bit her tongue once she felt the sting in her leg while adjusting herself, and she held onto him when Akira resumed his sprint.

Faint gunshots were picked up from faraway buildings and Akira grimaced. “Maybe Ryo can help us. I’m sure he will—he has to.”

“Ryo?” Miki asked. “You mean you didn’t already find him?”

Akira paused. “I was looking for his hotel until I found a crowd of humans throwing rocks at people they tied to stakes—at humans they thought were devils. I couldn’t fly away from that, so I tried to stop them even when they threw rocks at me. I wouldn’t kill a human, I never will and yet they were willing to kill me after I said I had the heart of a human.” His breath hitched at his next words. “I don’t understand why they hate each other so much, why they’re so willing to destroy everything for… what exactly? I just… Nothing is gained from all this.”

The houses they passed blazed brilliantly, bringing more life to an abandoned settlement in the grey world. Miki caught sight of a scrapped building and fire devouring much of the framework until, much like the sanity of a human, it couldn’t withstand the fire with its collapse. An explosion of broken glass and forgotten memories, all to later become dust and rubble once the flames were satisfied.

“I knew your heart hadn’t changed, before and after you became a devilman,” she softly said. “You… cried for them, didn’t you?”

Akira felt his throat close up. “Yeah, I did. And just like everyone else, they laughed and mocked me until… a boy came up to me and you know what he did? He hugged me. Another kid went to hug me, and then more of the others stopped to drop their rocks. I hugged everyone there, and at that moment I felt peace and had hope. Hope that maybe everything will be okay in the end, whenever that will be.”

“Until?”

“Until Koda attacked me. I didn’t understand why because he was a devilman like me. We both have human hearts, but still he wanted to kill me. Those humans I hugged were dead, if there weren’t just a few left, and… well. I realized I had to come back to you when I took care of other demons.”

Akira jumped over a ditch in the road, his frown deepened at a sudden thought. “Miko and Wamu… the others?”

He felt Miki tighten her hold on him. “Wamu… Gabi… they didn’t make it. And Miko? She… She died protecting me, Akira. We ran the same path we always ran, and I’ve always known that she loved me. I loved her too, it didn’t matter whether she was human or a devilman but her heart was always true—just like yours.”

The city degraded into a wasteland, where bodies and rubble littered the area and vegetation lost its color. The grass was grey, the roads were black with burn marks and dried blood, and Akira narrowed his eyes at the sight.

“Good people died… so many good people for no reason, humans or devilmen. No one could explain why to me other than they thought they were doing the right thing,” he said. “I guess I will never know what the right thing was all along, other than trying to stay alive.”

Green eyes grew heavy at his words. “Akira… You're more human than them, and I don't understand it. Why do they keep fighting and killing when your tears were always for them?” Miki wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, her voice breaking. “It's not fair. We're all humans at heart and yet… and y-yet...”

Akira listened to her, unable to respond when tears welled in his eyes.

They continued in silence, trying to ignore the waste around them and piles of bodies stacked near playgrounds and buildings with removed names. Names of people reduced to dirt and blood, forever forgotten and replaced with hate by those they thought they loved. Love was nonexistent, save for those who still fought for their lives and the good in a human heart—whoever’s body it was in.

Tears fell from them, adding a little life to the world before the ground swallowed the drops eagerly. Akira slowed his pace and looked around when they reached a hill. Miki felt his body shudder and she spoke softly, “Akira?”

“It’s… hard to run for long when you’re crying.” Akira raised an arm for her to grab onto his hand and guided her to the ground. He watched her slowly put her weight on her left leg, wincing slightly when she straightened her posture. “I’m sorry, Miki.”

“For what?”

Even when their bodies were vastly different, she still kept the same determination, the same look of compassion he saw from her for as long as he could remember. Tears continued to spill from Akira’s eyes when Miki gave him a gentle smile, and he gestured his hand, flexing his fingers for her to see his claws.

“For… this. For your family, for everyone and everything that happened. I’m so—”

Miki grabbed his hand and he stopped in surprise. The markings on his face, the fangs he revealed and the horns on his head, all were taken in with warmth radiating in her eyes. “You have nothing to apologize for, Akira. Don’t blame yourself for all that had happened when the fault isn’t yours. And like before”—she stepped forward to hug him—“it’s okay to cry.”

The insanity of the physical world, the blood that had spilled and the stolen lives, all seemed to have paused when Akira crouched to hug her. He noticed tears streaming down her cheeks and he tried to keep his cries quiet, but like all the times before, the walls broke down. There he poured his heart out, crying for her, for the people that were once alive, and for how fate played its cards.

Miki listened to him, her voice soft and steady. “You saved me again, you know. You always had but this time you were the actual anchor. Miko passed the baton to me and… now you have it.”

She gasped quietly when she felt Akira’s form shrink and his skin against her face. Akira pulled her close in a tighter embrace, his breathing shallow as he whispered, “I can remain human because you exist. My humanity was based on you, Miki, I just didn’t realize it until now.” He pulled back to smile at her. “The thing I wanted to protect the most was you, after all.”

Someone always had to pass the baton, and Miki returned the smile. She motioned it with her hand, fingers curled and raising it to give it to him. “You may be the anchor but we’re still finishing the race together.”

“Yeah, we are.” Akira curled his fingers to hold the baton, his smile growing. He peered closer at a sparkle on her ear. “And hey, where’d you get the earring?”

“Ah, Wamu gave it to me. He said it’ll protect me if I wear it, but I wanted to lend it to you.”

“To me?”

“Well yeah.” Miki tilted her head to remove the earring and on tiptoe, she reached to touch Akira’s ear. “I felt like I wouldn’t see you again, and this is just to be sure that you’ll be safe.”

Akira watched her curiously, feeling the earring settle in with a gentle push of a finger and he touched it when she stepped back. “Think it’ll really work?”

“I can say it worked on me and hey, I am a witch.”

“Heh, the witch and the devil. I’m sure everyone would lose their minds if they thought we were working together or something,” Akira chuckled. His laugh cut short when he glanced around them, not that he hadn’t been mindful of their surroundings but the weight of the grey world crept up on him again.

A soft sigh, a heavy look when Miki followed his gaze. “It’s not the end, Akira. You saved others before, and you saved me so I know you can save everyone else, if not just those who believe in you.”

“You sound so sure… but I have to believe it. I only wish I saved Miko and Wamu a little sooner, and despite all that we’re up against, I think we still have a chance.”

“You mean us finding Ryo?”

Akira’s eyes narrowed at the name. “Ryo… yes. I don’t understand why he exposed me like that or allowed everything to happen but at the same time… We can still fight through this. I want to believe we're still friends and I know we can survive with his help.”

A hesitant pause and after a moment, he tensed and wings sprouted from his back. Although far from angelic, they fluttered in the same delicate matter when they reached their full size. Wings of a monster but with a body full of love, and Miki watched him transform in awe.

While he towered over her, Akira kept a gentle smile when he gave her his hand. “How’s your leg?”

“It’s just a flesh wound, but I’m okay now.” Miki grasped his hand, her feet dangling in the air when he lifted her up. She settled herself comfortably on his back. “Probably better, when I think about it.”

“I’m glad to hear that.”

He crouched, a deep breath in, and he jumped up. His body spiraled and at another breath, his wings flared up. Defying gravity for a moment before the world realized a new color in the sky, the breath released and they soared through the sky. The rush of wind on her face, the same sensation she felt whenever she ran and Miki couldn’t help but laugh. A brief moment where they could forget the insanity around them, where they could smile a little at the cold air hitting their faces. Yet after taking in the ruined cities and fire Akira glided over, the smiles grew pained. Miki watched the piles of bodies, the fire licking away anything that held any life to it, and the stranded running far from those who chased after them until they stopped dead after a gunshot.

While they held colors in the grey sky, color drained from their faces at the sight below them. Akira sighed heavily, lamenting thoughts racing through his mind at the possibility that maybe he can save them—that he could’ve saved them. To save more colors in the world if they allowed him to, even when the rest of humanity wanted nothing more than to see the color of his blood on the ground. He was brought back to reality when he felt Miki tighten her hold on him, her face pressing against him.

“Miki?” he softly said.

“Just in case, Akira. And… thank you.”

He hadn’t noticed it before but with her embrace, he felt her heartbeat against him. A strong, steady rhythm—a heart he was able to save—and Akira smiled at the sensation. He did save the most vibrant color of them all, after all.

“I remembered your father’s promise. We’re in this together. Always.”

Different in body and yet their hearts remained the same, even more so when tears spilled from both their eyes. Their faces glistened and even when they heard the chaos below them, they kept a bit of faith in the world. If not just hope in those below them, then hope in another person to bring more color in a grey, grey world.

[jiminthestreets-bonesinthesheets]

OK!!!! here it is! So, fair warning, this story will be done in episodes. so each fic will be posted as one episode with chapters and its gunna be a long trek, but i like it that way lol

also sorry for any spelling or grammer mistakes, i tried to get  them all but i may have missed some... oops! and if you like it let me know if you want to be tagged in the future! ok... here we go...

Chapter 1:

         “Graduation tomorrow, Bones, can you believe it!?” Jim smacked his friend in the chest as they strolled through the Academy halls, “And after summer we have six months of placement, the only thing currently standing between me and a ship. Once placement is finished then it’s space, space, nothing but space, sitting in my captains chair.”

    Bones groaned beside him, the thought of being in space still haunting him all these years later, “Space is disease and danger, wrapped in darkness and silence. We’ll be lucky if we don’t end up with Microbian Stephis, see if you're still bouncing around when you're bleeding from every organ you’ve got. And let’s hope we don’t come across Glorian Pink Eye, cuz I don’t wanna hear you complaining when you can’t see through you're swollen, puss filled eye balls.”

    Jim laughed, turning to look at the scowling man beside him. “Bones, why did you even signup for Starfleet?”

    “I told you, the ex-wife took everything in the divorce, all I’ve got left-”

    “Is your bones,” he finished for him with a smirk and a nod, “I know, Bones.”

    Bones stopped walking, Jim turning to face him, “Well,” Bones said, crossing his arms, a hint of mockery in his voice, “if you’d listened that well in your Earth History class then maybe you would have passed with a better grade.”

    “Earth history is boring.” And it was true, even Bones had to admit he hated that class just as much as Jim did. As a peace keeping planet, not too much happened on Earth.

    “I know it was boring, but…” he sighed, wondering if he should even bring it up, “Jim, you're Pa is a major part of Earth’s history.”

    He regretted bringing up the topic immediately as he watched as Jim’s bright, hopeful, ready to take on the universe attitude did a complete u-turn right before his eyes.

    “I know,” he replied, suddenly finding something on the floor fascinating, before whispering, “I just wish he could have been part of mine.”

    Bones was about to reach out, tell Jim he shouldn’t be upset but instead should be proud of his Pa, because if it wasn’t for him, Jim and so many others wouldn’t be alive today. But right before his arm made contact with Jim, his friend was shoved violently into him from behind, Bones catching him just before he hit the floor.

    He peered around Jim to see who had been able to shove him so hard to knock him almost clean off his feet, and was surprised to see a dirty blonde pony tail standing behind him.

    He pushed Jim off of him and continued to stare at this girl, unable to even comprehend the English language let alone speak it. He couldn’t see much of her face, for it was shoved nose deep in a PADD, but he could tell she was the most beautiful thing this side of the whole damn planet but… what should he say?! He had been married once before so he should know what to do by now… shouldn’t he?!

    Before he could manage to compose himself she began walking past them, not seeming to be the slightest bit bothered by what had just occurred. While all Bones could do was just stand there wide eyed while the cat had his tongue, Jim decided he was going to give her a piece of his mind.

    “Hey!” he shouted, “Maybe you should get your nose out of that PADD and actually pay attention to where you're going! Damn near killed me!”

    The girl turned, shifting her eyes away from her PADD and to Jim for a mere fraction of a second, before turning back.

    When she looked at him, Jim became as stoic as Bones, there was something about this girl… but it couldn’t be, “It can’t be her,” he whispered, more to himself then Bones, “Not after all this time, it…” he shook his head, fighting the back and forth in his mind, then decided to just go for it. He suddenly bolted, sprinting across the hallway leaving Bones behind. He raised a hand in the air as he ran towards her shouting, “Rielle!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    “Rielle, could you please assist me later on this evening in completing a laboratory experiment on the chemical attributes of the flora the U.S.S Hudson retrieved on their mission to Reverion last week?”

    The dirty blonde turned slowly in her chair as her fingers slid gracefully over the PADD she had been stuck to for nearly three days now. Without removing her eyes from the screen she answered, “Of course, Spock, when and where?”

    “Laboratory B, at 1800 hours would be excellent.”

    “Sounds good,” though Spock wondered if she was actually listening to him.

    Before he could voice his concerns that she would leave him standing in the labs alone tonight, her comm went off.

    “Lieutenant Rielle,” she answered, still not removing her eyes from the object before her.

    “Rielle, it’s Pike. Meet me in my office in ten, we have some last minute details we need to go over before tomorrows graduation.”

    “Roger that!” Spock shook his head at her lack of restraint. Had she have been anyone else, the captain would have had her head for forgetting to add “sir” to the end of that reply.

    She placed the comm in it’s holder on her belt and stood making way for the door. “Spock,” she turned, “I don’t know how long this meeting with Pike will take, but knowing that man, probably forever. Is there any way we could do the experiment tomorrow? Same time, same place?”

    “I see no harm in waiting one more day, Lieutenant.”

    “Thanks, Spock.” And with that she was gone and practically running through the halls, which she would soon come to regret.

    She was almost there, mere meters away from Pikes office, when some bozo decided it was a good idea to stop in the middle of the hallway. Right smack dab in her way. Now, it was partly her fault since she couldn’t tear herself away from the article on transwarp beaming she had been reading for three days, Montgomery Scott was a fine engineer indeed, but she would never admit to anyone that she was to blame for colliding with the idiot in front of her.

    She decided now was not the time to get in a heated argument with the blond she almost knocked to the ground, hoping maybe that would be enough to perhaps knock some sense into him, and carried on past him. Apparently not.

    “Hey!” he shouted, “Maybe you should get your nose out of that PADD and actually pay attention to where you're going! Damn near killed me!”

    It took just about every inch of self control she had to not turn back and punch that mouthy son of a bitch in the face, but somehow she managed it. She turned, throwing a wave in his direction and making slight eye contact, and instantly wished she hadn’t.

    As soon as her eyes made contact with those baby blues, she knew. No one else in the entire galaxy could ever match that shade of blue, no one, and her suspicions where right when he called her name.

“Rielle!”

    “Oh god, no…” she didn’t want to turn back, didn’t want this confrontation now, or ever again to be honest. Maybe if she just kept walking there was a chance he wouldn’t get to her before she could get to Pike’s office. Today, it seemed, was not her lucky day.

    Steps away from the door the boy grabbed her arm, stopping her just before she opened it.

    “Rielle!” she dropped her PADD to the floor hearing his voice, “Rielle… don’t you remember me? It’s Jim-”

    He was stopped short by a sharp slap to the cheek as she turned to finally face him.

    “Oh, I remember you Jim Kirk!” her face red with rage.

    He let her arm go, pulling back a step to place a hand on his now burning cheek, “Still as fiery as ever, I see.”

    “Screw you Jim! How dare you come up to me after all these years and act as if nothing happened! Did you think I would just forgive you? Did you think you could just walk up to me, strike up a conversation, and we could just step right back into where things left off?!” she paused to cross her arms, “you do remember how things left off, don’t you?”

    “Rielle, I-”

    She put a hand up, stopping him again, “Save it, Jim, I’ve got a meeting with Captain Pike, and now you’ve made me late.”

    With that she opened the door and quickly closed it behind her.

    Bones, finally remembering that English was his native language, came to stand beside a still dumbfounded Jim. “What the hell was that all about? Why’d she hit you?”

    “Because,” he replied mindlessly as he reached down to grab the PADD she had dropped at his feet, “I’m a huge idiot.”

    “Yeah,” Bones sighed, “what else is new?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Chris Pike looked up from his desk as his office door flew opened and quickly slammed shut. He was even more surprised by the fact that the blonde who rushed in also locked the door behind her. Unusual.

    Without sparing her a second glance, he returned to his work and muttered mindlessly, “Everything alright, Rielle?”

    “No!” she practically screamed, “I just bumped into Jim Kirk.”

    “Jim Kirk?!” Chris abandoned his work, pushing it aside, “The Jim Kirk?! He's here?!”

    “Yes, the Jim Kirk.” She peeled herself from her previous place leaning on the door and made her way to the chair in front of Chris’s desk, planting herself there. She put both feet on the desk in front of her, crossing her arms across her chest. “How did you not know he was at the Academy?”

    “There are so many students here, I barely know any of them, and I rarely teach.” He raised a brow at her as she slouched further in her chair, attempting to read her as he then asked, “And how do you feel about Jim being at the Academy?”

    “Angry,” she shook her head as she continued, “furious, upset, used, left behind, appalled, and did I mention angry? God, I'm so mad at him!”

    Chris sighed, he knew everything there was to know about the history between Jim Kirk and Rielle. He knew there was so much to their past that meant the world to her, but what Jim did, he was never sure she could forgive though he had hoped she would should this day ever come. But if there was one thing in the universe that Chris Pike was absolutely sure on, it was just how stubborn he knew Rielle could be.

    He pushed out from his desk and moved to sit on the corner beside her feet. He let out a small chuckled at her scornful expression before asking, “Well, did you tell him that?”

    “Are you kidding me?!” she exclaimed, eyes wide, “After what he did, I think it’s quite clear he doesn’t care at all! About me, or anyone other then himself. Not to mention the fact that when I bumped into him and he finally realized it was me, he walked up to me as if nothing even happened. Does he think that I’m just going to forgive him and move on, just like that?!”

    Yep, just as stubborn as always. “Rielle, I'm going to give you my honest opinion here, and I want you to listen to everything I have to say.” She nodded, urging him to continue, “Jim Kirk is, and always has been, your world. Maybe he was right to act as if nothing happened, maybe you two should just move forwards instead of looking backwards.”

    Rielle scrunched her brows and sat forwards ready to argue but was cut off by Chris's hand.

    “Wait,” he stopped her, “listen to every word. Instead of brushing Jim off why don’t you see what he has to say? Maybe he has a good reason for what he did.”

    “A good reason?!” that’ll be the day, she thought, “What good reason could he have for abandoning me?!”

    “You’ll never know the truth unless you ask,” he shrugged.

    “Well…” she sat back in the chair, staring straight, “what does one even say in a situation like this?”

    “Hi,” he said simply, “nice to see you, I missed you, can we talk?”

    “I don’t know,” she brought a hand up to her head resting it on her temple, “I don’t know if I even want to know what insane, hair brained excuse that giant idiot can come up with.”

    “Look,” he began, a stern look in his eyes, one she had seen many times, “I saw what he did to you, how badly he hurt you, and how it affected you even years after. The least he can give you is an explanation.”

    “Yeah, I guess you're right.”

    “Good,” he gave her shoulder a light tap before returning to his chair behind the desk, “now, we still have a lot to do before graduation tomorrow and I am panicking!”

    She chuckled as she found comfort in the thought that some things never change. Sit Chris Pike in the captains chair and throw him into battle, and you'll witness the most well put together man the universe has ever seen, cool, collected, and confident. But ask him to do the simple task of organizing this year’s graduation and a chicken with its head cut off would look more organized then Chris.

    She reached out and took a small stack of papers from Chris, getting right to work.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    “Good god, man!”

    Jim and Bones were sat across from each other in the cafeteria. Jim telling Bones all about the blonde from the hallway, while a stunned Bones listened with a mouthful of spaghetti hovering halfway between his mouth and his plate.

    “I can’t believe you did that?! I mean, I knew you didn’t have a heart, but come on!” He placed the fork on the plate, giving up on his food altogether, “I don’t think even a Klingon is that cold blooded, Jim.”

    “Come on, Bones,” Jim slouched deeper in his chair, “I already feel awful about it, don’t make me feel worse.”

    “Well you should,” he nodded at him, “pretty girl like that, you should feel worse then my Uncle Charlie after Thanksgiving dinner. And let me tell you, six helpings of turkey dinner washed down with an entire bottle of whiskey ain’t a pretty sight.”

    Usually Jim found amusement in his friends’ metaphors, but not today. Today he sat across from Bones, his appetite completely vanished, and his usual Kirk charm nowhere to be found. All of his thoughts were on Rielle.

    Bones took the last bit of food off his fork and noticed that Jim’s plate remained unusually full, the kid had a black hole for a stomach he was sure, but instead he stared blankly at the table. “If it’s bothering you that much, would it kill you to try again?”

    “No,” he slowly looked up to Bones, “but she might.”

    He waved a hand at him, “I think you're over exaggerating, Jim, she looks harmless.”

   “Looks can be deceiving, Bones.”

    “Look,” he began, stern faced, “I say tomorrow, after the ceremony, you find her and apologize.”

    Jim shook his head, “You don’t know her like I do. She won’t forgive me, I wouldn’t forgive me.”

    “You might be surprised, Jim,” he took up his tray and turned away from the table before shouting back, “I'm sorry goes a long way”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Jim and bones filed into the stadium with the rest of the graduating cadets. It was decorated in star fleet colours, complete with chair covers, banners, even balloons. Jim was impressed, so was Bones.

    He let out a whistle as they entered the stadium, “You wouldn’t think it but the professors sure do know how to put on a good spread,” he nudged Jim as they went to find their assigned seats.

    “Yeah,” he said as they came up on row 12E for Bones and 13G for Jim, turns out Jim's seat was right behind Bones, “I just hope the foods good.”

    “You not gunna ask your pretty friend to dinner after the ceremony?” Bones tried to make it sound like a tease but Jim knew it was a serious question.

    “She might not even be here.” Jim thought back to his years at the academy. He had taken the mandatory courses but also chose to take on almost five times that of a normal course load as extra electives, and he had never seen Rielle in any of them. In fact, aside from yesterday in the halls, he had never seen her in the Academy, period. “She might not even be graduating. I don’t know what year she's in, or if she graduated already. I mean, before everything went down between us, she was talking about enlisting, so there’s a chance she's way ahead of us.”

    Before Bones could give his two cents the lights dimmed and the stage before them lit up as their professors, captains, and admirals lined the stage before sitting on the chairs placed there for them.

    Bones turned back to Jim tapping his leg, and Jim leaned forwards, “Front row, second from the podium. There’s your pretty blonde.”

    Jim gaped, wide eyed at the stage, “She's a teacher?!”

    A man, who Jim recognized as Admiral Markus, came to the podium silencing the crowd before him, but Jim remained hunched forwards close to Bones as Markus spoke. “Welcome, everyone! Today we gather to celebrate the great minds of these wonderful people sitting here before us. Our future.” He gestured to the cadets below and the crowd gave a short cheer, “But I'm not going to take all the credit for this brilliant ceremony, and instead I will hand you over to Captain Pike, one of our most esteemed members of Starfleet. He singlehandedly organized this entire ceremony for you, so cadets, make sure you give Captain Pike your thanks on your way out. Over to you, Captain.”

    Jim paled for the second time that night. He thought bumping into Rielle was bad enough, but this was worse. “Bones!” he whispered harshly while smacking his shoulder, “Bones!”

    “What?!”

    “I know him too!” he pointed to the man now standing at the podium.

    “Seriously?! You think you know a guy,” he shook his head, “What did you do to him?”

    “No, it’s not like that, he's-”

    Jim was cut short in his explanation as Captain Pike began his speech, “Thank you, Admiral Markus. But, this is not about me, this night is about you. Your hard work and dedication has gotten you this far and let me tell you, it does not end here my friends. In fact, this is just the beginning. Now, I’ve had the pleasure of teaching some of you, and I use the word pleasure lightly here, looking at you Kurt Mccullen.” A small hoot was heard from somewhere to Jim’s right and the stadium erupted in a rumble of laughter. Jim shot his attention to the chair second to the left and watched as Rielle let a small smile escape. That smile, Jim thought, I missed it. “But honestly, in all my years as a teacher and captain, I have never known a better group of cadets. I am confident when I say that I know you were all meant for great things, and we all expect it of you. So, with that I will say congratulations on making it through and let’s kick this ceremony into full gear. If I could have row 1 please join me for your degrees.”

    It took what felt to Jim like a lifetime before Captain Pike called row 13 to the front, but it finally happened. Bones passed him on his way back to his seat, giving him a “good luck” bump on his arm, and then it was Jim’s turn. He stood a few feet away from the stage, waiting for his name to be called, butterflies doing flips in hi stomach. He couldn’t even look up as Captain Pike began to speak.

    “And now, I call upon a cadet who…” Pike paused, turning to look back at Rielle for a brief moment before continuing, “Who I have known for a long time. Someone I, unfortunately, did not have the pleasure of teaching during his time here at the Academy, though someone who I am sure exceeded the expectations of his teachers, and will continue to do so as he ventures forth on whatever path he should choose. Cadet James T. Kirk, come on up and get your degree, son.”

    Jim took the four small steps up to the podium and stood before Captain Pike. He looks Jim dead in the eyes, and for a moment Jim wasn’t sure what he would say, but what he did say left Jim a bit shocked, “Well son, despite everything, congratulations.” He took Jim’s hand, holding it between them, “I'm sorry I didn’t know you were enlisted in the Academy or I would have tried to contact you sooner, I…”

   Pike noticed as Jim glanced at Rielle from the corner of his eye. She was standing with the other Academy Officials, trying very hard not to make any eye contact with him. Pike gave Jim’s hand one final squeeze before finally handing him his degree and saying with a pat to his shoulder, “Go on son,” and nodding in her direction.

    Jim couldn’t even speak, he didn’t know what to say. All he could do was nod and slowly make his way over to Rielle. He was standing in front of her, trying to think of what he could possibly come up with that wouldn’t make her hate him even more then she already does, when just as she was about to look up, a hand took her shoulder turning her away from Jim.

    He jumped out of his trace and looked to see some bowl cut, pointy eared guy behind her, now holding all of her attention. He shook his head, deciding that maybe right here on stage wasn’t the place to be harshly rejected in front of his entire graduating class, and made his way back to his seat behind Bones.

    He plopped himself down hard with a huff as Bones leaned back to ask, “Didn’t go well, did it?”

    “No!” Just my luck, he thought, “Who is that pointy eared bastard, anyways?”

    “Alright,” Pike began again before Bones could answer, “now that everyone has received their degrees and awards, there is one more item on the agenda that needs to be tended to. So, without further adieu, I would like to invite someone very special to the stage to present our last but perhaps our most prestigious award. I would like to invite Starfleet's very own head researcher, data analyst, science officer, engineer specialist, and all round go to girl, Rielle.”

    “Wow!” Bones nodded as he watched her walk across the stage replacing Pike, “Pretty and smart.”

    “I… I never knew she had accomplished so much.”

    Bones turned in his seat to face Jim completely. He leaned an arm on the back of his seat and sighed, “Well, Jim, I hate to be the bearer of bad news but, it's kind of your own fault that you don’t know anything about her anymore.”

    As Bones turned his attention back to the stage Jim couldn’t help but feel he was right. It was all his fault.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Rielle stood, hands clasped in front of her, watching from the corner of her eye as Pike gave Jim his degree. All she wanted was for him to walk past her without so much as a second glance and take his seat in the sea of cadets. Then she saw his feet move, towards her instead of the stairs to her right. Panic swelled in her chest, her breathing escalated, and when his feet stopped moving right in front of her she thought she would pass out right there on stage. Rielle was a strong girl, there was hardly a conflict she couldn’t handle, but Jim Kirk was the one exception.

    She thought maybe it would be best to just get this over with. To give him what he wanted and talk to him, maybe then he would go away. Surely the interest he currently holds in trying to talk to her would soon fade and she could go back to pretending he no longer existed.

    With a sigh she swallowed her pride and slowly began lifting her head to meet his eyes, when a god send grabbed her shoulder turning her completely away from Jim and she could not have been happier.

    Her head snapped up to find Spock, hand still on her shoulder as she whispered, “Is he still there?!”

    “He has returned to his seat.”

    “Thank god,” she clutched her chest, bending over slightly, “that was not something I wanted to deal with right now.”

    Spock moved his eyes along the crowd, finding Jim almost directly in the center of the stadium, “That is him, correct? The man you told me of before?”

    She nodded, “yeah, that’s him.” She brought a hand up to ruffle the hair in her pony tail, “I thought he was gone Spock, I thought… I thought I would never see him again. Here I am only now getting over him, ten years later, and he shows up just to blow my emotions back into hyperdrive.”

    “Perhaps,” he shifted his weight slightly and tilted his head to whisper only to her, “I should take on the form of human culture and offer my services should you need someone to, as you say, “give him a good beating””

    She couldn’t help the laugh that escaped her lips. Rielle had known Spock for a long time now and was used to Spock being all Vulcan all the time, but whenever he let a little bit of human slip through the cracks of his hard Vulcan exterior, it made even the worst of days seem a little brighter.

    “I would like to invite Starfleet's very own head researcher, data analyst, science officer, engineer specialist, and all round go to girl, Rielle.” She tuned in just in time to catch the end of Pikes speech and turned her head to the podium. Pike was gesturing her over to take his place.

    “Well, that’s my cue,” she flashed the Vulcan a small smile and a wink before she left, “thanks Spock.”

    With a salute she replaced pike at the podium and faced the crowd. The stadium was completely full, not an empty seat to be found. Did it scare her, to be in front of all those people giving a speech? No, not one bit, she lived for this. She just hoped that she could keep her wandering eyes at bay, should she dare to spy Jim in the crowd.

    With one single breath, she placed her hands on the podium and began, cool, collected, and confident, “Thank-you, Captain Pike, and hello cadets, congratulations to you all. I am here to award a very special cadet with one of the Academy’s most distinguished awards.

    When I graduated the academy eight years ago, I was honoured to receive thirteen awards in various subjects ranging from linguistics, to engineering, nuclear biology, xenoethics and culture, captaincy, ambassadorial introduction, and many others. I received the highest marks in the courses and received high praises from teachers and guests to our Academy on my high level of understanding in all areas of study. And that is what this award is all about. This award will be given to the cadet whom the staff have widely recognized as an all round achieving student, but instead of handing out thirteen awards, we have decided to join them together into one."

    Now, I do not know the name of the recipient of this award, only Admiral Markus holds that knowledge, but I have been told that this cadet is someone that everyone should aspire to be, should look up to. I am told that they excelled in all areas of study and continue, even now, to seek out new opportunities to further their knowledge and understanding of everything we stand for here at Starfleet. This cadet leaves here tonight with offers from not only Starfleet, but from outlying planets such as Ateron, Vulmencia, Draxus 9, and even Niam. They have received offers from various science academies, ambassadors, and have been hand picked by several captains here at Starfleet who would like to offer them a place on their ships. These include the U.S.S Galdor, Victoir, Gazine, as well as the Enterprise captained by Captain Pike, whose offer was submitted last night. This cadet clearly has a great future ahead of them, one that they deserve, and any of these offers would be a great path to follow. Though, I might suggest the Enterprise, it is after all the ship I will be serving on come summer and I would love to work with and get to know this amazing cadet. Now, I think we have left this cadet in enough suspense so Admiral Markus,” she turned then, one hand outstretched towards the man in question, “may I ask for the envelope now, please?”

    With a smile he stood, reaching a hand inside his jacket, and retrieving a small palm sized envelope handing it to Rielle.

    “Thank-you, Sir,” she turned back to the crowd holding the envelope up slightly, “Inside this envelope holds the name of the very remarkable cadet I have had the absolute honour of speaking about tonight. I encourage you all, as fellow cadets, friends, and possibly future coworkers, to congratulate this cadet in their hard work and dedication that got them to where they are today. And so, the recipient of this years Starfleet Achievement award is…” she broke the seal of the envelope and slowly pulled the paper out. She could hear the anticipation in the air, the hope and desperation. She turned the small piece of paper over to reveal the name and instantly felt all the blood drain from her body, “James T. Kirk,” she whispered to herself. Well if someone was trying to make her day go from bad to worse, they did it.

    Realizing that all eyes were still on her she moved closer to the mic, regaining her cool, collected, and confident attitude that she normally held, and spoke, “The recipient is James T. Kirk.”

    The crowd erupted into cheers and her head turned to her right as she saw Jim stand and begin making his way towards the stairs. Once he had made his way to stand before her, she steadied her breath and looked him dead in the eyes as she said without waiver, “James Tiberius Kirk, I am honoured to award you with the Starfleet Achievement award.”

    He flashed her that James T. Kirk smile, the one that always used to bring her to her knees, and damn if she wasn’t feeling that now. After he took the award from her he held out his hand waiting for her to take it. Truthfully, she didn’t want to, but she knew what it felt like to be embarrassed in front of so many people. Reluctantly she took his hand, and the second she made contact with Jim she never wanted to let go again. It was like everything came rushing back and she realized just how much she truly missed him. Missed his smile, his charm, his whit. She missed scary movies in the dark, star gazing on the roof, staying up all hours of the night just to talk about nothing. She actually missed James T. Kirk.

    Before she could collect her thoughts and say anything else the crowd of cadets stood and suddenly they were standing under a cascade of graduation caps. She removed her hand from where it was still connected with Jim’s and took her chance to escape through the sea of people now making their way to the stage. Jim tried to grab her before she could but lost her faster then he could blink an eye. Bones found him then, and informed him that there was food being served in the main hall if he cared to join, to which Jim turned down. Normally, bones would insist on a physical after personally witnessing Jim turn down food twice in less then twenty-four hours, but he knew why. He knew the rejection from the blonde was hitting Jim in a way that bones didn’t quite understand yet, and he knew Jim just needed time.

    With a clasp on the back bones left and Jim stayed in the stadium, sitting on the edge of the stage watching as the crowd got smaller and smaller, until finally it was just him.

    Footsteps made their way towards Jim, slowly and cautiously. The clearing of a throat bought Jim out of his slump long enough to look up to the owner of the feet in front of him.

    “Rielle!”

    She shifted nervously, not quite knowing what to say, then decided to follow some wise advice, “Hi,” she said quietly, almost so Jim couldn’t hear, “nice to see you, I missed you, can… can we talk?”

    “Yeah,” he said, a bit shocked, “yeah of course.”

    “Good,” she nodded, “coffee on Dunstan Street?”

    Jim stood, a little too quickly almost sending himself flying off the stage. He wasn’t sure what this was, whether she was still angry, hurt, he didn’t know, but he did hope that this was a sign she was possibly willing to let it go and move forwards. Either way, he was willing to give it everything he had if it meant a small possibility of having her back in his life.

    He held an arm out, leading her towards the exit, and she allowed him to without struggle. Halfway across the stadium she tilted her head up to Jim, “oh! And you're definitely buying.”

    He stopped, staring at her with mock anger before bursting out laughing. Some things never change.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ SOOOOOOOO let me know what you guys think!!  happy thoughts i hope!!

thanks for reading XD if you made it this far lol

[crusadedean]

My Medicine | 10k x Reader

Pairing: 10k x Reader

Word Count: 1,400 words

Warnings: A really high, adorable 10k.

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❝Somebody mixed my medicine And somebody's in my head again❞

Disclaimer: This imagine was based on the episode 03x06, “Doc Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” Some of the things certain characters say are exactly as they said it in the show, but some of it is changed up to fit along with the imagine. 

“What the hell happened?” You questioned as you woke up. 

You lifted your head up to get a look around. Doc was sitting right beside you and there were other people around you, that you didn’t know. Doc was already awake and seemed to be talking to these people. Upon hearing your voice he looked over at you.

“Hey, kid, nice to see you awake. No time for introductions, 10k is here,” Doc spoke quietly. 

Your ears perked up at this, it had been awhile since you’ve seen 10k and at this point, you were questioning if he was still alive. Then you began to ask Doc, “Where is he, is he okay?”

“Get up, follow me and the nurse.”

You did as you were told. From the looks of this place, it seemed to be a looney bin. You were surprised that one of these can actually withstand the apocalypse with patients still alive in it! 

Doc had instructed you to stay outside while he dealt with the nurse and checked on 10k. You were watching through a window, you were happy to see 10k alive. Though you could tell he was in and out of it. You weren’t quite sure what could’ve happened to him, it pained you to see him like this.  

Once the nurse and Doc exited the room they talked for a few. The nurse had a bag in her hand and showed it to Doc as they were talking. You were curious to what it could be. Their conversation came to an end in seconds and Doc walked over to you. 

“Told the nurse he has 10k fever. We can’t let them know we know who he is. You stay here with him Y/N. He was muttering your name a lot. Go in and check on him, but don’t stay too long.”  You nodded to his words as you watched him and the nurse walk away. When the disappeared around a corner you made your way into the room. 10k was still muttering things under his breath as you made your way over to him.

“Hey, 10k. I can’t believe you’re here. I thought you were gone forever,” you said as you picked him up so he was in a sitting position, you then gave him a hug. 

His eyes were wide as he took in your words, “Y/N, you’re alive. Is this real?” 

You giggled before responding, “Yes, it’s real. I’ve got to go, though. I’m not supposed to be in here for long. I just wanted to say hi.”

“Don’t leave me,” He begged, but you knew you had to leave before someone saw you with him. 

“I have to go, I’m sorry. I’ll see you soon,” You promised him as you planted a kiss on his forehead. He seemed content with that because as you laid him down he had a huge smile on his face. 

A patient came running into the room in a panic, “Doctor, Doctor come quick, the kid with 10k is seizing!” 

“Bring me my surgical tools,” The nurse announced. 

“A lobotomy is not going to fix him. He needs medication, some real medication. Is there anywhere here you can get real medication?” Doc asked the nurse. 

“There is a fully stocked pharmacy,” The nurse paused, “In the z ward.” 

“What’s the big deal with the z ward?” Doc responded. 

“Shocker zombies, Patients who turned during shock treatment. You have to go through all of them to get to the pharmacy.” 

“Of course,” Doc muttered.

The nurse explained how there was a series of three locks to get through. 

“Y/N You stay back and make sure the kid with 10k is fine. I’m going to go get some medicine.” 

“Will do, Doc.” you answered. 

A patient followed you to go watch on 10k. You exchanged looking through the window at him and over to Doc. At the last moment, you saw an Elvis impersonator go with Doc to get the meds, you were thankful he wasn’t all alone. 

10k was fine for a few until he started seizing. Before you could get in to help him, the patient that had followed you screamed to the nurse. 

You had been watching 10k no matter how hard you tried the nurse wouldn’t quit. She wouldn’t wait for Doc, in her opinion a lobotomy needed to be done right away. You had yelled at the patient that sold you out. You told her to make sure Doc got back safely and as quick as he could as you made sure the nurse didn’t do anything. Though he was already taking forever. 

It seemed like years before Doc got back, but he finally made it. He was the one able to talk the nurse out of doing the lobotomy. Right now he was listing tons of medications off to give to 10k.

“Is he going to be okay, that sounds like a lot of drugs to give to someone.” You said.

“Um,” Doc paused for a few seconds, “I’m sure he’ll be fine.” 

After Doc drugged up 10k he handed out some pills to the rest of the patients. He didn’t get a chance to finish before a certain someone decided to make an entrance. 

“Hey, Doc” 10k yelled happily. 

Doc walked up to him and patted his shoulder as he whispered, “Be cool, man. They don’t know I know you.” 

You guys made your way to a table and sat down. It was great to see 10k in a better mood, although you knew he was just really high. 

“How are you feeling?” Doc questioned him. 

“Super mellow,” he replied as he drug out the words slowly. 

“You’re alive, I knew you were alive. Everybody was sure you were dead, but not me. How’d you make it out alive, though?”

“Murphy saved me,” 10k said nonchalantly as if it were no big deal.

“The Murphy?” Doc and I both questioned.

“He’s different,” I gave him a questioning look.

“You okay?” I asked him. 

Before he answered, his eyes were all over the place and then he looked at you with a huge grin, “Yes.”

You smiled and reached over taking one of his hand in yours, “I’m really glad that you’re alive 10k. I was scared I’d never see you again.”

“Well, here I am,” He cheered. 

“Yep,” You smiled.

He leaned over and started twirling a piece of hair, “Have I ever told you how beautiful you are? You have a really pretty smile.”

You giggled, before looking over at Doc, “What the heck did you give him?”

Doc just sat back in his chair with a smile on his face and shrugged. 

Your attention was brought back to 10k as he spoke again,”You didn’t answer my question. You have really soft hair.” 

“Um, no you’ve never told me and thanks.” Though you had a crush on 10k you weren’t sure how to react to him right now. 

“I should’ve told you. You’re so pretty.” 10k chuckled as he kept twirling and running his hands through your hair.

“Wow, those pills really give you confidence huh?” 

10k didn’t answer, but he did plant his lips on yours without a thought. You weren’t sure what to do, but you were given the chance to kiss 10k so you took it. Completely forgetting that Doc was right next to you both. 

“Okay, as much as I think you two are cute, I have to break this up.” He sadly interrupted.

You both pulled away from each other. You were stunned, but 10k seemed even more shocked with himself as he sat back with wide eyes and brought his hand up to his lips to feel over them. 

“Woah, was that real?” 10k said barely above a whisper, but it was loud enough for you and Doc to hear it.

“Sure was, kid,” Doc said.

10k gazed over at you, “I think I’m in love with you, Y/N.”

You giggled, “Save that for when you’re not doped out 10k. For now, we need to figure out how to get out of here.” 

Doc agreed and you all got to your feet. Although 10k needed help and he refused to take it from Doc. 

“I want the pretty girl to take me.” He smiled.

At that, Doc handed him over to you and 10k put his arm around your shoulder while wearing a wide grin.

[topazshadowwolf]

False Hope (Chapter 2)

After the human left the underground, Sans is left trying to piece his life back together with those who remain. As time goes on, decisions are made about what monster kind should do next, and how best to escape to the surface. But if they do get there their freedom, what will happen?

Written by: Topaz Shadowwolf Undertale Fan fiction Undertale is owned by Toby Fox

Heads up: Soriel, Sans POV, my goal in writing this is to poke at your emotions Warnings: Major character death, implied suicide, homicidal thoughts, don’t expect a happy ending

AO3 On Tumblr: Ch 1

False Hope: Chapter 2

Anger

It is easy to just say I was angry. Because, yeah, I was angry. Still am, really, just a different kind. I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but there are various levels and strengths to that emotion. To say all anger is the same is like saying one color is the exactly like another. That orange is the same as purple because they both have red in them.

I wasn’t even aware of that myself until that moment, since I’m, uh, not normally the type of monster to get mad. But what I felt in that moment was like being trapped in a well of rage; one that was so deep that I couldn’t see any light or feel anything else. I was trapped in a darkness that was different than the depressed kind I was used to. It took over my soul and mind.

Oddly enough, it was Tori and Papyrus who keep me from slipping too deep. Sounds silly, I know. I mean, some would say the fact I saw and heard them was a sign that I had lost it. Even I question if I’m really “all here.” But all I know is, I could be worse off. Not the best answer, really. It’s all I got, though.

I would have done better if they were alive and with me. But, apparently, that wasn't an option.

How many monsters had to die?

Heh…

And I just sat by, as a passive observer.

In case you’re wondering, watching all that wasn’t what kept me angry. It was the unending wait for the reset. Worse yet, knowing that I desperately want the one thing that I despised for so long. It’s cruel. Imagine wanting something that felt like poison, because you knew it could possibly make everything better in the end. Of course, it could also have made things worse...

Yeah, it was the waiting for the unknown that really got to me.

I guess I still hold on to the notion that things could be better because it had been. There are these visions in my head, they leave the feeling that things had been happy once. That things could have been peaceful; but that wasn’t good enough for…

Well… anyway

I’m still angry.

The light from the screen was starting to hurt his eye sockets, but he didn’t care. Alphys needed this. They sat, marathoning some anime she had found recently. From what she could tell, it was based off some actual human history, though loosely. Sans would hazard a guess that the history ended at some of the names and places. But, Alphys liked it, so he endured it, silently thankful she didn't have a full season. Once they finally finished the episodes she found, they moved on to something more “futuristic.”

Sans glanced at Alphys during the third episode of it, unsure if he should say what was on his mind. Honestly, he was proud of himself for staying awake this long. Normally he is fast asleep by now, and just kept Alphys company by being here and available to talk when she wanted.

Lately, sleeping has been hard, his dreams have been distorted and cruel. Toriel helped when she could, giving him some peace at night, but not every night is peaceful. And it doesn't help he still won't return home, even when Papyrus asked him. Instead, he had used random side caverns in Waterfall. They aren't comfortable, but he never had trouble sleeping anywhere before. When he finally decided to visit Alphys, she invited him to stay at the lab, and he agreed.

Still, there was something bothering him about this anime; besides, it might make her laugh. With an exaggerated sigh, he looked at Alphys, “y’know the science behind this is wrong, right?”

Alphys threw her hands up, started ranting, and shoved him. All Sans could do is snicker, catching enough words to tell she was saying it was about more than the science, and he was being short sighted getting hung up on that. Like normal, she noticed what she was doing and paused, “um, s-sorry, I think I spoiled t-the mid-season… umm… sorry….”

“it’s alright, al,” Sans smiled. They continued watching, Sans added comments now and again, getting the yellow reptilian monster to laugh or yell at him.

As the last episode of the first season ended, they sat in silence again. Alphys must have known there was something on his mind, as she waited in silence. Looking over at her, he paused, undoubtable he hated breaking their fun, but he knew this couldn’t last forever, “so, uh, how’s undyne?”

Alphys looked down, “she’s r-really mad. She w-wishes she could’ve d-done more. I… I think y-you should go t-talk to her.”

Sans looked away, and his eye sockets dimmed, “i don’t think i have the strength for that right now.”

“I-I wish you would…,” Alphys sighed, “she needs s-someone… y-you do too. You know? Someone w-who’s, um, not like me….”

“al,” he put his head in his hands, “i just don’t know how to face her. or anyone living. and what am i supposed to do now?”

Alphys leaned over and hugged him, “I have some n-notes that you should, um, l-look at.” He looked back at Alphys after he forced his eyes to light again, knowing she doesn’t like the empty sockets. “I-I think i-if you look at them y-you’ll be able t-to do what I couldn’t.”

Sans sighed, “sure al.” He shifted to hug her back, “sorry i wasn’t here for you.”

“I-it’s alright… I was… um… well, I…,” Alphys fell silent.

Eventually he left, knowing he will be back later to look over the notes Alphys mentioned. He had a few himself, as well. Perhaps they will combine, and he could use them to achieve their freedom. And then what?

As he made his way to the capitol he stopped and stared at the CORE. During the time in the Underground, two great minds were robbed from monster kind. It was wrong. Both Alphys and her predecessor deserved more than what they got. One was forgotten, and the other was so ignored as a person that she let her sadness consume her. Maybe if he had done more with her, helped her out more than what little he did, Alphys might still be here.

But she will be back again when the human resets, right? It only made sense. After all, that’s how it always worked before. Though, why it felt like they were taking so long to reset was the question. This waiting was agonizing. It made him want to scream. But he didn’t, because a part of him accepted that this was not permanent. That eventually it would all end and he will wake up with little or no memory of this.

All the time he spent in Snowdin’s cold masked a chill that existed in his soul. Even as he stood there, while the heat of Hotlands absorbed into his bones, that frozen section did not warm. Pulling his hood over his skull, he ambled his way through a shortcut, bypassing New Home and went straight to the castle.

The throne room doors, closed before him, were an ominous presence. Behind them sat the first living monster, he would have talk to, since the human left. That notional alone terrified him. The last several weeks he had learned he preferred to talk with the dead. With them he didn't have to explain how he felt, they knew.

It would be easier to not care. To go back and stay with the dead, and not have to deal with the living anymore. That idea sorely tempted him, and he almost turned back. Two different hands touched his shoulders, one on each side, reassured him that he should continue forward. He recognized the large paw of Toriel and the gloved hand of Papyrus. With closed his eye sockets, he soaked in their comfort before he stepped forward, using a shortcut instead of opening the door.

Undyne was there, on the throne. The crown looked just as heavy on her head as it did Asgore’s. The flowers in the throne room were still alive, but clearly not as well tended as Asgore kept them. But then, the boss monster had a way with plants that no one else seemed to possess. Walking further in, he saw her slowly raise her head, and once they looked each other in the eye he stopped.

No words needed to pass between them, they both saw the emotional pain within each other. The same torturous feeling, that all but tore them apart, echoed in their eyes. Standing up from the throne, Undyne smiled and walked forward, “I wish you would’ve gotten here sooner, nerd.”

“i, uh, needed to straighten some things out in my head,” Sans said with a shrug.

Undyne looked at him quietly then nodded, “I understand. And I suppose my first month of ruling was a whirlwind of activity.” There was silence from her for a moment before she shook her head, “I saw you on the monitors in the lab. Not sure who you were talking to… but I think you needed them more than me.”

Unsure of what say, Sans just looked at her; he let the silence between them say what couldn’t be said.

“so, uh, what’s the plan?” Sans asked, tired of being the subject of discussion.

“If possible, I don’t want to collect souls. We don’t need humans to free us,” Undyne said, her grip on her spear tightened till her knuckles blanched. The weapon had an appearance like the trident that Asgore owned. “I want us to kill any human that falls down here, still. And when we escape we will hunt down that murderer.”

Understanding that plan, Sans nodded.

“well, there are some notes in the lab that might help with that. alphys was nearing an answer, and maybe i can finish what she started.”

They talked, and planned for a while, until they tired. Undyne encouraged him to stay at the castle. He accepted for just the night, and let her know he would spend the rest of his nights in the lab.

When he had a moment alone, he made a phone call to the human.

[whathelluci]

Lucifer 2x11 Thoughts

As much as I spend almost all my time on Tumblr, I’m not a regular blogger, I do it quietly and that’s what I prefer. I reblog this and that like on the rest of my other blogs, and I do speak out when I have strong bursts of emotion (also known as ‘feels’) that cannot be contained.

And since waiting forever for this episode, I cannot keep it inside and I’m letting it all out.

You guys watched it on Monday night, where I live I watched it at Tuesday morning. Bad news, I had classes. Good news, I only have 2 classes on Tuesdays, but that didn’t stop my heart beating so fast or my stomach churning or me looking at my watch every five minutes to get these freakin’ classes over with. And I went home as fast as I could without looking weird, Fate seemed to be on my side when I hailed transport immediately and took the last seat. And I was sooooo excited for this episode I woke up at 4am, my mom usually makes me lunch when I get home, and usually I don’t finish them on Lucifer days.

Aaand right into the episode. 

I must have paused the video in every moment I mentioned here because I couldn’t contain myself from squealing and laughing.

Luci adorably stuttering

Luci and Chloe leaning closer to each other while talking. Chloe nodding in agreement with Luci about stupid ketchup while mere inches from kissing him

Their second attempt date dinner ruined too dammnit let them have a proper date 

Luci desperate for Chloe to understand. “We were having a moment. Don’t be angry.” He just loves her so much.

“She just kept me from making a big mistake.” Sweet sweet babies huuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrtttttt

Chloe seriously stuttering it wasn’t a date while blushing and Trixie knows better than her mom

Luci not accepting unannounced ladies anymore because he’s so upset that his and Chloe’s moment was interrupted

“It’s about Chloe.” Hook, line and sinker

In contrast with Lucifer and his relationship with God and His plans, as much as he’s disliking Mom he’s still wanting that relationship with her and looks so happy of her “approval”

denial jealous chloe is my new favorite

Loser from Lux is you, Luci

dan and maze is my new favorite too

everything in this show is my favorite

I like how they don’t have Dan’s character as the “split up from divorce and got left behind” thing. Like he really reflects what he said “People will go crazy lengths for the ones they love.” He did it with Malcolm and then Perry Smith

I SCREAMED SOOOOO LOUD AT LUCI IN A WHITE SUIT. I CANT BELIEVE I HAVENT SEEN A GIFSET OF THAT. HE LOOKS SO HOOOTT. CHLOE INTERNALLY THOUGHT SO TOOO

“Opposites attract.” CHLOE SAID THAT TOO ABOUT LUCIFER AND FATHER FRANK

“She’s spoken for.” “Hehe, no, I’m not.”  JEALOUS LUCIIIIIIII HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

BI DEVIL BI DEVIL BI DEVIL BI DEVIL BI DEVIL

I MEAN, CHLOE SERIOUSLY INTERROGATED EVERY SINGLE OF THOSE PEOPLE BECAUSE SHE’S JEALOUS

i absolutely love this show, but i mostly covered my ears and blocked the activities of Luci and *ahem* people that are not Chloe

Chloe had to ask if there was special intimacy and dinner along with the sex, wondering if Luci treats her the same with them

bUT THEN, everyone said HE was just a one night stand 

LIKE OH MY GOD, I WAS TOTALLY THEORIZING THIS BEFORE THE EP, CHLOE MIGHT BE JEALOUS OF LUCI’S EX-FLAMES BUT THEN SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO WORRY BECAUSE LUCIFER’S RELATIONSHIP WITH CHLOE IS THE LONGEST AND MOST MEANINGFUL AND THAT’S BEFORE THE SEX

tom ellis looks so good at acting hurt

Dan comforting Luci I want more of that 

maze is so adorable 

they seriously did just not with that Lucifan girl

That was the hottest car driving in existence fight me

Maze is awesome bitches

Amenadiel is like adorably confused 24/7 now

“DO YOU THINK I’M BOYFRIEND MATERIAL????”

BOYFRIEND

HE SAID BOYFRIEND

I WAS EXPECTING FOR THE KISS BUT I NEVER EXPECTED THAT

HE WANTS A MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIP AND HE WANTS THAT WITH CHLOE

BOYFRIEND

HE SO WANTS TO BE WORTHY FOR HER

“Humans and the Divine don’t mix.” I wish they would expand on why. Like humanity and divinity aren’t compatible, i wonder if it’s just that or something more

as much as i adore Luci’s hurt face please stop hurting him

“can i keep him”

Devil is a pro-feminist don’t mess with him

Lucifer Morningstar says he’s unworthy, but still he says he’s a good guy 

Lucifer Morningstar thinks he’s unworthy for Chloe and says she deserves someone better even if it’s not him

Lucifer Morningstar lists off things about her that makes her special and saying it like it annoys him

Lucifer Morningstar knows every murder breaks her heart without her admitting it

Lucifer Morningstar says her middle name is boring but says it anyway

Lucifer Morningstar being hopelessly in love with Chloe Jane Decker and doesn’t think he’s best for her

Chloe Jane Decker kisses the man who is best for her

It’s feels amazing to be a Deckerstar shipper