#it should be fine if you try to harden an egg that was a bit too soft-boiled for your tastes riiight?

[not-a-bumblebee]

"My kitchen after the egg incident had better environmental storytelling than this", okay now I'm curious.

I am afraid it will not be an exciting story, but sure, imagine this: You are my husband. You come home for lunch, where normally a plate of food lovingly made by your malewife awaits you to be heated up in the microwave. A simple meal that usually consists of pasta or rice with some kind of protein. This time, when you come in, the kitchen window is open. The microwave is also open, with occasional yellow chunks staining the walls. The spinning plate is missing from the microwave, and sitting in the dish drying rack instead. If you look in the trash can, you will see paper towels, also with yellow stains on them. If you open the fridge, you see two bowls of pasta, by itself, with no garnish. Next to the microwave, on the counter, you can find a saucer that houses oddly shaped chunks of, presumably, egg. ... by the time I came home, he did not need an explanation to know what dumb-ass decision I had made while hastily cooking lunch before work.

[atsadi-shenanigans]

Feeding Alligators 44 - Dance With the Devil in the Pale Moonlight

Rated changed to E (just in case). Potential trigger warnings on the chapter in AO3. The sadness arc is here.

On AO3.

***

You find some stuff. You leave. Gale blows down the roof. You rejoin the others and wander out of the stink cloud of rot and set up camp. Gale makes food. You eat it mechanically.

Notice Astarion watching you.

Try to focus on the conversation but you can’t. Everyone is talking and their faces move and their limbs gesture. It’s like watching wooden puppets dancing around to an alien performance. Their words make no sense. Their expressions make no sense. You sit there and float on a cloud and do not taste your food.

The sun sinks into the treetops. Dread rises cold and leaden in you.

You can say no. Should say no. You can do it in front of all the others in case it turns out you’re wrong and he doesn’t take it well.

But.

You’ve dated before. Just the once. Ryan Meadows. Nice dude, one of Sasha’s friends. Never raised a voice or a hand against you. Said he wanted to take things slow. A real history buff and he was teaching you to cook more than boiled eggs.

Until he wanted to take it further. And you said no. Because the secular world said you could (no heavenly father or The Pastor to disapprove of you not satisfying a husband, no congregation to hold you responsible for failing your wifely duties). And Ryan had accepted that. He’d been gracious. He’d been kind. He’d smiled at you and hugged you (you hadn’t got to kissing, yet) and told you you never had to force yourself.

Then he ghosted you.

And you realized the secular world was just as much a piece of shit liar as your mother’s. You could, indeed, say no. And the world and the people in it would hold up a mirror so you could see exactly what you were worth if you didn’t open your legs.

Which was nothing.

No call, no text. He even ghosted Sasha (and she’d raged on your behalf for days, which…she meant well. But in all honestly it made you feel worse, taking up her time and attention like that).

You could and did build you some worth on your brains and your learned typing and filing skills. You got your apartment and a credit score. But you saw it in their eyes when you refused coworkers and strangers alike. How you got passed over, left out. How you’d started catching murmurs (never to your face, that would be rude). Ice queen and frigid, nun and sad and what’s her deal, is she gay—shh!

You can say no. And lose every single chance at friendship. If you refuse Astarion, he will drop you quicker than a sack of rotten potatoes, and the others will catch on. Broken goods. Legs padlocked shut. And once they realize you don’t want to fuck any of them, either? Once that option is closed and you make a bad call, ever?

You cannot survive on your own, here. You can’t.

Astarion glances to you again. You’re pretty sure those are what they call bedroom eyes—the half-lidded thing. Shadowheart catches him doing it and it looks like she stepped on a slug with her bare feet.

It’s fine. It’ll be fine. A bit of exercise, once and done, and this time tomorrow, you’ll have had sex, oh goodie.

But what if he wants to again.

Gale looks at you. Frowns, actually. “Are you alright?”

You sit against a tree in the clearing. Your plate is empty (you have no idea what he cooked). You hold a slice of bread in your hand. What remains of one, anyway; you done squeezed it into a hardened ball of dough.

You can’t breathe.

“It’s been a day,” you say and smile. You make sure to keep the edges of your mouth soft, keep your lips from being too rigid. “I think I’m gonna wash up. Thank you for dinner; it was delicious.”

“My pleasure,” Gale says, and he ain’t as good as you at making his smile look genuine.

Karlach ducks to whisper something to Lae’zel. Who gives you a cool once-over. The giant tiefling looks back at you, eyes sparkling. She looks so happy for you.

You force yourself to give her a thumbs up. You feel Astarion’s stare on the back of your neck as you turn and head down to the river.

It’s just sex. A bit of touching, he’ll probably use fingers at first, if he’s courteous. All you have to do is not scream or flinch. Don’t lie there like a doll. Maybe touch him back (oh god) and participate or something.

Maybe you can make it bad? A bad lay is still more valuable than an ice queen.

You take a sharp breath. Flap your hands to try to dissipate the tingles.

It’s just sex. You’ll be fine. It’ll probably feel nice and there’s no need whatsoever to get so worked up about it, stop being stupid.

Your head gets that memo, reads it over, and nods. Your body launches itself into a tantrum you cannot control.

You undress. Try not to feel so exposed as the wind brushes your breasts and between your legs. There will be hands there, soon.

It is literally just sex. It’s fine. You’re fine. This is nerves, is what it is. You said yes. It’s still happening on your terms, even if you didn’t initiate it. Astarion is, well…he’s not actually a good man, is he? He’s an outright bastard. But he’s funny? And there’s something about him you recognize, some connection you can’t name. He’s seen you at your worst, and he’s fine with it.

He jokes about it.

And he wants you. At least for this, at least for right now (lamed gazelle, the most vulnerable prey and what is a vampire if not a predator—)

But that just means you’re going into this eyes wide open. You know he’s not like, marriage material or anything, and he doesn’t see you as such either. You ain’t even sure he’s capable of that kind of attachment (he might be?? You just do not know). He wants sex, just sex, and you can handle that and it’ll secure him to the group and better secure you to the group. That’s what European marriages were: a political alliance forged through genital contact.

A snort breaks free. And it’s the first pebble in a whole ass landslide. You end up crouching in the river, butt-naked, laughing your ass off.

Honestly, you’re probably about to have a better first time than a lot of people—especially the ones with vaginas. Might as well enjoy what you can. You can even make it a funny story, later. “Oh, my first? Got railed by a vampire bareback out in the woods.”

It’s already hilarious.

You get to washing. Well, washing as best you can without soap. Or a razor; you don’t normally shave your legs (wasn’t a thing, growing up) and you never had the time or the spoons for the armpits. Plus, you weren’t looking to impress nobody.

You splash between your legs. If somebody is gonna be all up in there, it only seems polite.

And somebody is gonna be all up in there. Jesus lord, there’s going to be a cock inside you—

The flush is part fluster and part nerves. That’s what you tell yourself. It’s normal. This is normal. You’re lucky, really.

Really.

Absolutely.

Your hands still shake as you pull your trousers on for the walk back to your tent. You got the one clean pair; you’ll change into those.

The rest is on AO3 just in case, and also because it's long.

Previous - Index - Next Chapter

[hollandsangel]

we need a milf reader x tom where dads are ogling at her

pls and thank you

i was truly obsessed with this concept it was so cute and fun to write

shameless | tom holland

gif by @thollandgifs !

it’s late evening. tom had gotten off work a little later than usual, and you’d taken your time eating dinner together before wandering to the grocery store for the week's shop. 

the store is relatively empty, considering the hour, and it’s the picture of peace as you walk leisurely down the aisles with your hand in one of tom’s, the basket hanging from his other arm.

“okay,” you begin, holding up a small slip of paper littered with tom’s messy handwriting, “we’ve got the eggs, almond milk, peaches…” you’re mumbling to yourself as you check things off the list, and tom is watching you intently, smiling as he observes you. “oh! we need to get some more of those cookies, the little ones with the…the…” you snap your fingers, trying to remember.

tom quirks a brow, “the fudge ones?”

“yes! those ones.” you nod, looking over to search the shelves for the familiar box.

“i thought you didn’t like them?” his brows furrow together, reminiscing on a time when you forced the box away from you, hardly able to handle the scent.

“well i guess the baby changed their mind.” you shrug, rubbing a hand over your swollen belly with a hum.

tom looks down, admiring the action you do so absently now, without as much as a thought. he shifts the basket into the crook of his elbow to free his own hand, joining you in the soothing motion. he can’t help but grin, over taken with joy at the reminder that you’re carrying his child, that in a few more weeks, you’ll be parents. he leans in and presses his soft lips to your temple. you hum in acceptance.

down the aisle, tom catches the maundering stare of man about his age glued to your body. you’re wearing a loose knit sweater under your trench coat, but with your due date growing nearer, you show through most of your clothes. tom hardens his gaze at the man, who is shameless in his ogling of you. it makes his skin crawl.

“c’mon love,” he tugs on your hand, his eyes forward, “i think they’re in the next aisle.” he doesn’t really know, but he can’t stand the hungry look being shot at you, so he pulls you away, pressing himself closer and glaring at the bloke as you pass him. 

“are you okay?” your sweet voice pulls him back to you, expression matching your tone when he meets your eyes.

“yeah, m’ okay.” he nods, pecking your cheek to further his point.

“mmk,” you hum, “what flavour of protein bars did you want, lovie? you didn’t write it on the list…tom?”

“what the fuck?” he mutters, head turning as another man eyes your form.

“excuse me?” you remark incredulously.

“baby, we gotta go.” with a bit too much urgency, tom tugs your hand, and the waddle you have to do to keep up with him must look ridiculous.

“tom, tom, slow down, pregnant lady here.” you remind him, still as confused as ever, “what’s wrong?”

“oh, shit, sorry, love,” he seems to calm, “are you alright?” and there he is again, your attentive, loving husband.

“yes, i’m fine, are you okay?

he huffs and looks around. you’re in the health food aisle now, and it seems pretty vacant, “these men keep looking at you, darling, like they want to fucking ravish you.” he explaims in a hushed voice, seriousness crawling amongst each word.

you laugh, and tom pulls back.

“y/n,” he says sternly, “i’m serious.”

“i know,” you giggle, “that’s why it’s so funny.” with a squeeze of his hand you release it, moving yours up to his shoulder instead, “why does it matter?”

tom seems almost offended by this question, “because you’re my wife?” he says, as if the answer should be incredibly obvious, “and it’s weird to look at a pregnant woman, who is clearly in a relationship, so shamelessly??”

you can’t bite back your laugh any longer, and it tumbles out when you shake your head and pat his cheek, “you’re ridiculous and cute. go get your protein bars, doof.”

[rocorambles]

Two Wrongs Equal a Right

Pairing: Bakugo x Reader

Prompt: Eavesdropping

Summary: Eavesdropping isn’t right, but maybe...just maybe sometimes the end justifies the means

A/N: This is for the Anylisum’s SFW collab. Masterlist can be found here. Enjoy!

You giggle, laying your head on Tsu’s shoulder as you catch your breath from the impromptu dance party happening in the dorm room led by no other than Mina. You love the boys, but this is nice, hanging out with just the girls, chatting about fashion and makeup, doing face masks and braiding hair, pretending you’re just normal high school girls and not heroes in training. The boys had sulked, pouting and complaining about why all of you couldn’t hang out together like you always do. But all of you had just smiled and cheekily waved as you locked the dorm room shut behind you.

They’ll be fine. You’re sure they’ll find something to bond over themselves and you laugh at the thought of them doing some impromptu sparring or shouting at each other over a video game.

Yes, they’ll be just fine doing something normal high school boys do. Definitely not quietly crowding around the other side of the dorm door, trying to eavesdrop on what all of you are saying and doing like they’re doing right now.

The boys of class 1-A aren’t nearly as subtle as they think they are accidentally banging foreheads and elbowing each other to try and press their ears against the vertical surface. But luckily for them the combination of the music and your voices drown out their scuffling and they eagerly listen in, curiosity keeping their attention rooted to the commotion on the other side of the barrier.

“That’s not fair. I want to dance too!”

“Shut up, Aoyama! They’re going to hear you.”

The hushed bickering continues as the boys continue to subtly bop their head to the music, trying to make out the snippets of conversation between the rhythmic beat and laughter. But they all freeze, even attempting to quiet down their breathing as the music finally stops.

Is the night over? Do they need to make a run for it before the door opens and they’re caught red handed?

Their questions are answered when after some scuffling and movement the girls resume talking and there’s a palpable sense of relief as the boys relax, leaning in once more to decipher what’s being said.

What girls night would be complete without boy talk? You all knew this topic was bound to come up in this safe all-female haven, but there’s still a tittering of nervous and shy giggles when Ashido brings up the topic with a mischievous grin plastered across her face.

It takes some prodding and some patience, but to no one’s surprise Uraraka is the first to speak up and you all smile knowingly when she begins to ramble on and on about Deku, how much she respects him, how observant he is, how hardworking he is…

“We get it. You like Deku! Seriously it would be shocking if you two didn’t eventually start dating.”

“Think about how cute that would be! A romantic hero couple fighting villains and saving the world together.”

Uraraka’s face is so red you think she might burst, but you hide a smile at the fact that there isn’t even a hint or sound of denial from her as she accepts the good-natured teasing. Unknown to all of you, Deku’s face matches Urarka’s extreme shade of red and the boys smile and nudge him playfully, waggling their eyebrows teasingly.

The light-hearted banter has broken the ice and Momo is the next one to open up, demurely looking at the ground and swiping a stray bang behind her ear as she quietly praises Todoroki for his amazing skills and how rapidly he’s learned and improved during his time at U.A. But what she isn’t expecting is the outpouring of support she herself receives from all the girls about how smart and resourceful she is and how quick on her feet she is. And Todoroki silently nods his head in affirmation of the deserved recognition she receives.

One by one everyone shares their thoughts on their male counterparts, but it’s Ashido who makes everyone burst into laughter once more when she practically screams her approval of Kaminari and Kirishima and how cool and manly they can be, imitating their signature moves as best as she can to everyone’s amusement.

However it doesn’t go unnoticed how Bakugo’s name isn’t brought up and it just seems right to bring him into the conversation if the other two musketeers are being discussed. There’s thoughtful pondering and the girls quiet down as they think of their blonde classmate.

“He’s smart and talented.”

“He’s pretty good looking.”

But there’s an almost unanimous vote that his temper is a little bit...scary. Almost.

The boys try their hardest to stifle their howls of laughter as Bakugo begins to deeply scowl, looking like he’s ready to storm away. But everyone shuts up, eyes going wide when your voice travels through the air.

“I actually think his attitude is kind of cute. He’s like an angry chihuahua. All bark, no bite.”

There’s silence as everyone on both sides of the door processes your words, even Bakugo looks uncharacteristically stunned. And then there’s chaos as the girls begin to loudly question your sanity and the boys hold back a raging Bakugo who’s seconds away from kicking down the door and confronting you.

Needless to say there is no more eavesdropping done that night as it takes the entire male population of 1-A to wrestle Bakugo away and safely back to his dorm room.

Cute? CUTE?

Bakugo can’t remember the last time anyone has called him that damned word, if anyone ever has. Not even his own mother has called him anything remotely as nauseatingly endearing as that recently. There’s nothing about him that’s cute. He’s not cute. He HATES anything cute. Yet as he’s barricaded in his room and forced to mull over your words in solitude, it’s not pure rage and indignation that fills him to his own surprise.

He’s not sure exactly what he’s feeling if he’s honest and that only pisses him off more. Anger is something he knows and holds close. But this...this strange, disgusting, fluttering feeling in his stomach? He doesn’t know what that is and he grumpily forces himself to sleep, to leave all these stupid thoughts and feelings behind him. Tomorrow will be just another day of class and you’ll just be another classmate he’s forced to tolerate as he focuses on becoming a hero.

Except tomorrow does come and you aren’t just another nobody like you were before.

Unlike before where he barely even noticed your presence and walked past you like you were nonexistent, too focused on perfecting his moves, he can’t stop being aware of you. He finds himself watching you without even meaning to, observing your movements, the use of your quirk…

“Kacchan, watch out!”

Turns out even when he’s entranced by you, Deku’s damn annoying voice is enough to drag him out of his funk and he narrowly misses the debris about to rain down on him.

“What’s up, Bakugo? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you distracted-”

“I’m not distracted!”

He is distracted and he can feel his short fuse nearing its limit with every uncharacteristic stumble and sloppy movement as he can’t tear his eyes from you. And when Aizawa-sensei awkwardly tells him to maybe consider sitting out a bit until his head is clear he loses it.

Under all the rage, common sense tells him this isn’t your fault, that he’s wrongly directing his ire at you. But Bakugo clings onto his temper, that fire inside of him that fuels most of his decisions as he storms towards you and shouts at you to spar with him.

He knows he’s being too hard on you, punching and kicking you harder than he even goes against Kirishima and his hardening quirk. And he even feels a pang of guilt when he sees you wince when his fist grazes you as you try to dodge. But you don’t tell him to stop, just looking at him with determined, focused eyes holding a shocking amount of trust that he won’t take it too far and actually harm you despite how his irritation is almost visible.

It’s the same look stupid Deku looks at him with, but he doesn’t feel that familiar buildup of anger rising inside of him. Instead he feels that same strange fluttering feeling deep inside of him and his heart is racing more than it should be for the amount he’s worked out today. It’s all so...confusing and to everyone’s shock, it’s Bakugo who abruptly ends your weird impromptu spar with a scoff, shoving his hands in his pocket as he saunters away, trademark scowl on his face.

That’s only the beginning of Bakugo’s strange behavior and everyone watches anxiously as the angry blonde borderline begins to bully you on a constant basis, practically hovering next to you from the moment you leave your dorm room to the minute you go to sleep at night, growling, shouting, and even just glaring at you. But no one steps in, curious about how things will play out when they see how unbothered you are by your new volatile shadow.

Bakugo doesn’t know what reaction he expected of you. Maybe a slight hint of fear? At least some respect? But he certainly wasn’t expecting how calmly you accept your new fate, how casually you interact with him.

He’s forced to silently blink in shock as his jaw rapidly works to chew the fried egg you’ve stuffed in his mouth when he angrily tells you to sit somewhere else, deciding he wants your seat despite the bounty of empty chairs surrounding the both of you in the cafeteria. (He ends up just grumpily sitting in the available spot next to you when he finally swallows, both of you quietly munching on your breakfast together.)

But although your exchanges start off fairly one-sided with Bakugo usually trying to incite some reaction from you, everyone watches in amusement when you begin to meet him halfway. The blonde is mouthing off at you about something or another during sparring exercises which has become a typical background noise to the class by now, but everyone, including Aizawa-sensei stops in their tracks when your voice interrupts Bakugo’s rant.

“Maybe you’d be able to perfect your new technique if you spent more time practicing and less time barking at me.”

There’s a playful smirk on your face as you utter those fighting words and Aizawa wonders if today is the day he’ll have to prevent Bakugo from committing a truly villainous event. But even his jaw drops when all Bakugo does is scoff at your statement, barking at you to follow him to both your preferred area of the training grounds to resume practicing together.

Both of you look almost...friendly, exchanging punches and kicks, no heat behind Bakugo’s snarky comments, a smile on your face when you give it to him right back verbally. The upperclassmen and the pro-hero faculty watch in amused fondness as overtime Bakugo’s glowering and barking lulls down to a muted calm grumpiness as he continues to trail beside you. He’s not too different than a tamed feral kitten (not that any of them would voice that thought aloud and risk being blasted to pieces).

And as time continues on, everyone gets used to the fact that the two of you seem joined at the hip. You’re just...always together in a strange amicable friendship? Partnership? Relationship? No one knows how to exactly describe it and maybe that’s what finally leads to you overhearing an interesting conversation one morning in the dorms.

You yawn as you make your way to the common room to see who else is up, but you pause before you turn the corner from your hallway when you hear Kirishima mention your name.

“So what’s going on between the two of you. Are you dating?”

You don’t even have to peek around the bend to know who he’s talking to and your face heats up, ears perking up in anxious curiosity as you wait for Bakugo’s response. Realistically, you know you shouldn’t expect much. But it doesn’t make it hurt any less when you wait for Bakugo to shut Kirishima’s well-meaning thought down with a rude “why would I go out with that nobody” or some similar derogatory comment aimed at the idea of dating you or anyone for that matter.

Yet there’s only silence and a secret smile spreads across your face when all Bakugo finally responds with is a quiet scoff and a “it’s none of your business”.

“That’s not a no!”

“Shut up!”

Your heart is pounding as hope blossoms inside of it and you slowly countdown from ten, taking deep breaths to calm yourself down, schooling your face into as neutral an expression as possible. When your excess giddy energy is under some semblance of control, you make your presence known, bidding good morning to both boys and teasingly ruffling Bakugo’s spiky hair in a more affectionate version of a noogie. And Kirishima is left with a gaping jaw as he watches Bakugo merely roll his eyes at your antics and grunt here and there in response to your rambling as the two of you make your way to the cafeteria for breakfast together.

[batwritings]

I love you write for Sam, it's so go 🥺

Like image, he's off playing mc or streaming and you wake up from a bad dream and just need some love. You walk down to where he is dressed in one of his shirts and the reader just looks cute. He knows the drill and lets you onto his lap to relax and just spend some time with him. It gets a big flirt and maybe something more 👀👀👀

Awe, thank you! I love writing for Sam, he’s so sweet. <3 Enjoy~!

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You wake up with tears streaming down your face, fresh from a nightmare. They weren’t too common after having moved in with your lovely boyfriend Sam, but ever now and then they would come plague your life again. You sigh, pulling yourself from the bed to pad over to his streaming room.

You don’t hear any noise coming from inside, save for some soft music, but you knock just to be sure. Peeking in, you see Sam smiling over at you. That smile fades when he sees your red, puffy eyes. “Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” he opening his arms to you.

You shut the door behind you and wander over, adjusting his shirt you were in along the way. You let yourself be pulled into his lap, his arms cradling you gently. “Nightmare,” you mumble into his chest, his slow heartbeat calming you instantly.

“Aw, I’m sorry sweets,” he sighs holding you a bit tighter so you don’t fall off. “You wanna sit with me while I make some stuff for the SMP?”

You nod and watch him get to work. He was trying really hard to ignore the reflection of you in his computer screen as he worked. You looked absolutely adorable in his shirt, it being a bit too big for you.

Ever now and then you’d ask questions, shifting around in your spot. Sam would respond, hoping you wouldn’t notice the hardening of his member you were causing. At one point his voice cracked and you chuckled softly at him.

“Something bothering you big guy?” you asked, not intentionally trying to flirt, but definitely trying to flirt.

Sam cleared his throat, pulling his hands away from his computer. “Well, if I’m being honest,” he started, letting you shift in his lap. “You shifting is kinda starting something...and you look really cute in my shirt.”

You giggle a bit at him, straddling one of his thighs. “You gonna do something about it Sammy?” you smirk, trying to see if you can egg him on.

Sam knows this game all too well with you though. He lifts his thigh up so it brushes against your sex, your knee catching against him as well. The two of you sigh in unison, looking at each other after the fact and having a little laugh.

“Maybe I will,” he says, smiling deviously. He begins the process of lifting and dropping his leg, letting it rut against you while your knee rubs against him through his sweats. Your sighs and moans start to meld together, creating a lovely harmony that echoes across the walls.

You kiss him suddenly, unable to take it anymore. It’s sloppy and uncoordinated but neither of you seem to care. One of his hands tangle in your hand while the other holds you by the hips, guiding your movements. You feel the coil inside you building and let out a whine to warn him.

“You close sweetheart?” he asks breathily, his accent coming through just the slightest. You nod to him and he descends on your neck, leaving kisses and little nips in his wake. “Cum for me darling. Let me hear you.”

You don’t hesitate to let the coil snap, hips stuttering to a halt on Sam’s thigh. He rocks his forward into your knee a few more times before reaching his end, head buried in your neck. For the moment the two of you sit in comfortable silence, the only noises being your panting breaths and the whir of his computer.

Finally he looks back up at you with a goofy smile, kissing you sweetly. “Should probably clean up, huh?”

You plop yourself back in his lap, snuggling into his chest. “Don’t want to get up,” you yawn, getting comfortable.

Sam rolls his eyes at you but smiles, scooting forward to continue his work. “Fine,” he concedes. “But you’re doing laundry tomorrow then.”

[queen-pudi]

Satisfied?

Akaashi Keiji x Reader

18+ MINORS DNI TW: wax play, edging, degradation, teasing, maybe a bit OOC for him… ok maybe a lot I'm sorry😭 In which all you wanted was to be fucked like a slut and Akasshi was more than willing to grant your wish

You writhed around moaning in pain and ecstasy as more wax was poured on your stomach and thighs. While the wax hurt once initially put on it subsided into more pleasure and a comforting feeling of sorts. The pain mixing with the pleasure along with the fingers in between your legs causing you to unravel until the fingers pulled away abruptly. Having to once again wait for permission to come undone. Keiji looked at you and laughed at the way the tears were prickling your eyes, threatening to fall yet you resisted, not wanting him to have the upper hand. Seeing your resolve hardened only made him up the pace and the amount of wax. He wanted you to break To beg for him To cry for him Yet your pride wouldn't let you Truthfully this all started over nothing. All you did was bring him his lunch to work like a good girlfriend should. You did nothing wrong. You were an angel! Well, sort of... Maybe you did come in in a slightly tighter top than you would normally, and mayhaps you wore a skirt just a little shorter than you should have but honestly it was innocent. You just wanted to see that cute little blush on his face that always had your heart swelling with love and tease him more just to see his skin beet read. It was just so easy to get a rise out of him it's hard to resist. Plus the reward for it was always so sweet. You loved the moments where he just let loose and did all the filthy things his heart couldn't let him do. You loved when he had you begging for hours just aching for him to fill you up completely and use you like a toy. That leads you to right now Legs spread wide still donning that damn skirt, shirt off, wax dripping from your thighs and stomach threatening to harden, nipples throbbing for attention, and his fingers driving in and out of your dripping cunt, always sucking him in trying to get him to let you cum just once. "If you want it so bad then just admit what you did wrong and maybe indulge you," He said, staring down at you, judging you. He wanted you to admit defeat but you just had to be stubborn. "That implies that I did something wrong" you replied, eyes gleaming with mischief as you soon uttered your next sentence, not knowing of the consequence it would have "Besides, it's not like you can actually satisfy me" You lied, just wanting to rile him up Suddenly a switch flipped in Keiji, eyes darkening with anger and lust. He grabbed your legs and pushed them up to the bed frame as he leaned over you, trapping you in that position before driving himself into you and fucking you at a brutal pace. "Can't satisfy you? Don't make me laugh, after all this time not even one of your toys could have you screaming the way I do. Weren't you the one dressing up in that ridiculous outfit just for this? Just for me to fuck you like the slut you are?" He growled, words dripping with confidence cause he knew he had you beat. This was not what you were expecting. You just wanted to get off and egg him on, not get fucked into the next decade. With each thrust, your resolve weakened into nothing. Pretty soon you were screaming out for him. Legs being pressed so far you thought they would break. He had you right where he wanted you and honestly, you were fine with that if it meant having quite possibly the best orgasm of your life. "KEIJI FUCK" you screamed out, tears flowing out of your eyes from the immense pleasure you were feeling. Your walls tightened as his mouth worked wonders on your breasts, knowing that the marks he was leaving would take weeks to leave. "God you're taking me in so well" he groaned out, with the way you were squeezing around him he knew how close you were and he was too. "Shit Y/N I'm cumming" he moaned into your ear, pace somehow quickening from the already brutal pace he had. Soon he released into you, feeling your insides being painted white and loving every second. "I'm gonna cum" you screamed, expecting him to resume his pace, but that never came. Suddenly you felt him pull out abruptly,

hands leaving your body and pulling your legs off of him.

You opened your eyes hoping to plead for him to continue but were shocked to see a coldness in his eyes that you've never seen before. "Keiji please" you begged, hoping to finish what you started, but you were met with nothing but a cold laugh as he went to get off the bed. "Like you said babe," He said, voice cold and gaze hard as he leaned down into your ear "I can't satisfy you" he whispered, soon followed by a chuckle as he left you shell-shocked. Leaving you to deal with the mess.

Hi!! I'm back for a late-night fic and I'm actually hella proud of this one! If you enjoyed it please feel free to give me a like and if you really liked it then maybe a reblog. I realize i keep writing for haikyuu and so i might branch out for the next time i decide to write something. If you have any ideas feel free to let me know! HAVE A GREAT DAY AND I LOVE YOU ALL!!!

[plutonianrising]

while the cat’s away a.k/k.k

pairing: akaashi x kenma x f!reader

wc: 4.5k

description: akaashi shouldn’t have left his two brats home alone for so long

a/n: this was v much inspired by that “i think you deserve two boyfriends” tiktok so thank that guy for this

cw: fem!reader, dom!akaashi, switch!reader, switch!kenma, established poly relationship, safe word check-ins, rules, overstimulation, degradation, humiliation, threesome, cum-eating, aftercare implied

MINORS DNI PLS

Sometimes it can get boring when it’s just you and Kenma at home for the day. You know he’s usually busy streaming and it's usually fine since Keiji keeps you entertained. However, this morning Keiji insisted on handling the grocery shopping alone, saying it’d just be a quick in-and-out trip and he didn’t want Kenma to wake up left by himself. It was hours later now and Kenma had kissed you good morning and swiftly turned to his games. Even on his “day off” he’s playing with some of his friends. You’re kicking yourself now for having recently bought his current fixation. 

“Kyaaannmaaaa” you whine loudly and flop onto his lap. He doesn’t even acknowledge you as he moves his controller closer to his face. It’s almost like you’re not even there. You wouldn’t even be sure that he noticed you if it weren’t for the faint furrow in his brows and grimace on his lips. 

“Kenma you’ve been playing since you woke up. Can’t you take a little break? I don’t even think I’ve seen you eat yet,” you try to command even just a bit of his attention.

“I’m not hungry.” He grumbles. “And can’t you see I’m in the middle of a match? I can’t just leave whenever.” 

Your pouting turns to a full-blown scowl as his eyes leave his game for a moment to peek down at you; he realizes how quickly you’re reaching the threshold of your patience.

“I’m sorry I’m sorry. I know you hate when I play on my days off. Just sit in my lap and we’ll go do something else once this round finishes.” He backtracks. You roll your eyes but maneuver yourself so that you're straddling him with his arms around your waist and yours around his shoulders. You lean your head in the crook of his neck, gaining comfort from the smell of his shampoo even while your boyfriend is annoying the shit out of you. 

“You said one more match like 3 matches ago. I thought we had a rule about lying.” You say even though you know he really isn’t listening to you. You can faintly hear one of his friends talking in his headset. You thread your fingers through his grown-out hair absent-mindedly and open your phone with your other hand to text Keiji.

Kenma broke a rule. I’m gonna punish him. See you when you get home x

You’ve barely sent the message before you’re pressing down on his lap a little harder. You wiggle your ass as if feigning trying to get comfortable. You shift Kenma’s headset so that he can hear you whisper in his ear.

“Kenmaaa…” You trail off. “What happened to no lying hmm?” He stiffens and a cruel smile creeps its way onto your face. You place a hand on his chest and continue playing with his hair with the other, trying to coax him. You both know he can’t say anything with his friends on the other side and you relish in the fiery glare he shoots you.

You love how easy Kenma is to fluster. A breathy whisper against his neck. A sharp nip at his neck. It takes little to nothing to set him off. Even when you’re being punished and are forced to simply watch Keiji take him relentlessly. Kenma is breathtaking to you. When he’s annoying you. When he’s shyly grabbing your hand or Keiji’s to fall asleep. When he’s fucked out beyond recognition. At this point you’re probably obsessed over even the red that tints his ears when he begins getting overwhelmed. 

Sometimes you have to pay for your teasing but you know today at least, you’re fully in command. You know Kenma is too stubborn to shut off his game in the middle of a match with everyone on. After 3 years with him and Keiji, you know he’s a high-risk-high-reward kind of person. He was going to try his hardest to get through whatever you put him through without making a sound. Double or nothing.

“You remember how to tell me to stop, right?” You whisper again and press a kiss to his ear. Kenma nods.

“Hmm I wonder if I should make you say it out loud with everyone on call? Yea they’d think it’s random but better safe than sorry right?” You tease him. He shivers and goosebumps appear on his skin as you lightly drag your nails up his neck. He grunts softly and rolls his hips up to press against you. His eyes are begging you to drop that idea. Your wicked smile grows and you peck his lips. 

“You’re right baby. There’s already plenty of time to embarrass you. Don’t forget to talk to your friends on call Kenma. Wouldn’t want them thinking something happened to you.” You chuckle darkly.

You place your hands under his shirt and slowly slide up until you reach his nipples. They’re already hard from the chill of your room paired with his thin t-shirt. You press against one, softly toying with it with the pad of your finger. You watch as he tries to remain stone faced. His ears are a dead giveaway, though. You kiss all over his neck as he responds to someone. They’re feather-soft teases. You want him to have to beg to be marked by you.

“Kenma you’re so greedy..” You growl and pinch his nipple. He startles a bit at the surprise but quickly regains his composure. “You wanted this didn’t you? Too shy to say outright you wanted me to fuck you while you played?”

 “Or is it that you just like riling me up?” You tease him by grinding down onto his hardening dick. You roll both his nipples between your fingertips now, occasionally pinching them.

“Wanted the best of both worlds and even while I’m giving it to you, you can’t even be bothered to make those cute sounds you know I like so much.” You sigh, feigning sadness. You grind against him harder as you play with his nipples. You tease him further by kissing up his neck. It’s hard not to relish in his slight trembles when you blow cool air against his ear. While your focus is mostly on pleasuring Kenma, you cannot help the soft sighs that escape you. Seeing him struggle to control the stuttering of his hips only eggs you on. 

“How loud do you think I can be before they can all hear me?” You smirk and let out a quiet moan. Kenma’s eyes widen in panic and he slaps a hand over your mouth quickly. You slowly lick his palm while you maintain eye contact. His golden eyes are transfixed on yours, searching for any measure of mercy. He was kidding himself thinking he would find any. Many sessions with Keiji had trained you to follow through when you committed to something. 

Kenma slowly pulls his hand away from your face and you lean in closer. Your lips are just barely brushing against his as you mutter “Either you beg for me with everyone on the call. Or I just keep cumming by myself.”

He knows it’s a promise and not a threat. In terms of stamina, you have always had him beat, making over stimulating him a pretty frequent occurrence. At the beginning he and Keiji would switch out when it got to be too much for him but you two quickly learned that even with tears streaming down his face, his one thought is to satisfy you. You grab his face with one hand, squishing his cheeks a little. With the other you cover his mic. “What’s our word so I know you know it?” 

“It’s peaches. I’m ok. I want this,” he rushes out quietly, growing even redder. It’s this neediness that you so deeply craved. Kenma was quiet but he wasn’t exactly shy. When he really wanted something, he would push past his reservations to get it. And finally, right now, he wants you more than anything else. 

You finally kiss him deeply and Kenma reciprocates eagerly. To your content, his hips roll harder against you when your tongue enters his mouth. 

“Kenma? Why aren’t you moving, let’s go!” You hear someone say. You pull away from Kenma so that he can answer and he furrows his brow, obviously not ready for it to be over.

“Lev maybe if you quit worrying about what I’m doing you’d get more kills.” He quietly snips. You wince and giggle at his harsh tone, almost feeling bad about being the reason behind his expression. You lean close so you can speak into Kenma’s mic and as you talk you’re also taking a beat to fully appreciate how flushed and pretty Kenma looks. His mouth is wet and slightly pink and though his eyes are half-lidded he’s looking at you with full expectancy. It’s enough to pierce your heart. You aren’t sure if you’re actually punishing him or spoiling him rotten.

“Sorry about that boys” You giggle into the mic. Kenma’s mouth twitches downward a little when he hears how his friends’ react to your voice on mic. “Please forgive Kenma, I distracted him a little.” 

You don’t really pay attention to how they respond, turning your focus to slipping off Kenma’s boxers and your panties. You toss them somewhere across the room. As you slick Kenma’s dick with your wetness, it crosses your mind that Keiji could come home at any moment. You haven’t even looked to see how Keiji responded to your text. You’re probably screwed if he told you to wait until he gets back but you can’t focus on that with Kenma looking at you so eagerly, using every inch of his self-control to not fuck up into you.

Placing him at your entrance, you hold his gaze as you slide onto him. You take him all the way, forcing yourself to be just as quiet as he is. You let him try and focus on his game as you slowly roll your hips, silently screaming at how full he makes you feel. You fixate on the way his brows furrow and his breath quietly hitches. Kenma’s face is fully flushed as you ride him, not willing to give in or lose his game. You smirk and turn around slightly to look at his game. It brings you a weird sense of satisfaction that, even though he’s playing like normal, his dick is already twitching like he’s close. 

“Kyanma when’d you get so sensitive?” you tease quietly. “You been secretly touching yourself recently? Huh?”

“I-I” he begins to stutter out indignantly, trying not to pant too loudly. You cover the mic one more time. “I w-wouldn’t dare. J-just feels too good.”

You continue rolling your hips, reaching up with your other hand to palm your own breast. You don’t even try to resist the tightness building inside you. You let out a low moan as you shudder around him, your walls clenching around Kenma’s dick so deliciously that you can see the air choked in his throat as he stifles his own moans. As promised, you fuck him through your orgasm. His trembling makes it so much harder for you to relent. You want him to cum so badly, forcing you to turn off his game and fuck him until he’s a sobbing mess. 

He does so almost as soon as the almost obsessive thought crosses your mind. He holds you tight against him and buries his face in your collar, biting down hard in a final act of defiance. You yank Kenma’s head back by his hair and he’s glaring at you like his face and chest aren’t completely flushed and his pupils aren’t blown out. You let go of his hair and simply smirk and your anger makes it so much more fun to force shut down his computer. 

You wrap a hand around his neck and squeeze. “Kenma’s been such a naughty fucking kitty today haven’t you?” 

You slam down on his dick again and Kenma moans loudly this time. You aren’t sure if it’s from the pain of being overstimulated or simply the fact that he no longer faces the threat of embarrassment. Regardless, you know he’s going to be begging for that feeling again by the time you’re through with him.

You hear the front door of your apartment open and the familiar jangle of Keiji’s keys and soft footsteps. Keiji’s home but he puts the groceries away first. You know this is him giving you both time to collect yourselves and be on your knees somewhere for punishments. You know this but Kenma doesn’t look keen on moving and your heart is already beating in anticipation at how much further you could take this.

You hear Keiji’s footsteps grow louder and in seconds he’s right in front of you, analyzing what he’s seeing: an unplugged computer, Kenma slowly regaining his composure, and you right in his lap, lazily looking over at him with a smug little smile on your face. 

“Hey baby.” You can tell from one look what Keiji told you in response to your text. You can't help the way your body shudders in expectancy as he stares at you sternly. You kiss Kenma’s neck gently as you meet Keiji’s gaze, knowing full well you won’t be ready for the punishments he will be handing out.

“You had no intention of listening to me, did you?” Keiji says fondly as he walks over and stands behind you. He slides his hands around you: one pulling your against him, the other guiding your head up. His touch is gentle, his fingers moving you more so as a suggestion than a command. You struggle to keep your eyes open and on his beautiful features. Dark hair that curls in the strangest spots fell slightly forward. The sharpness in his deep blue eyes contrasts the loving way he strokes your cheek.

“Mmm… not really. Mmsorry ‘Kaashi but it’s so… much easier to just ask you for forgiveness. You’re so sweet to us.” Your words slur a bit and you smile up at your other boyfriend. You secretly wonder if you’re making the right call by pushing his buttons further. But oh well.

“Oh it's so much easier is it?” Keiji asks, his voice takes on an icy tone. He finally glances towards Kenma, slightly dazed as he watches you both. “Kenma do you agree?” 

You all know that no matter what Kenma says, he’s already in deep shit for going along with you. However, there is still a right and wrong answer. He could either a) agree and punish you with Keiji and receive a lighter punishment or b) side with you. The two of you make eye contact as he weighs his options. Memories of you sandwiched between them, mind hazy as they treated you like little more than a toy flood you. You vividly remember the time Keiji sent you over the edge repeatedly while you choked on Kenma’s dick, tears forming from how desperate for air you were. And the way they gazed down at you with your panties shoved in your mouth, so fully focused on making you scream that you feel like you’d been caught by two beasts.

You would never openly admit how much option A makes your mouth water but you don’t have to. Kenma doesn’t miss the way your thighs try to squeeze together, only to be met by his in between. Or the way your breathing has slightly picked up again. Or how you tightened around his still-sensitive dick the moment the thought crossed your mind.

“Yea ‘Kaashi… you’ve been really nice lately.” Kenma looks between you both and smiles before pressing close and embracing you. He holds onto part of your shirt and nuzzles into your neck. You don’t care if he was saying we’re in this together or I'm not letting you get all the attention after you ruined my game. Regardless, you still get to see Kenma trembling right next to you with puffy lips slightly parted, ready to beg, ready to need, ready to please.

Keiji stifles a laugh behind you, covering it quickly before petting both you and Kenma’s hairs. “I didn’t realize I’d been so gracious to my little brats. I guess that means you think it’s finally my turn for a reward?”

“What do you want us to do Master?” You ask coyly. 

“Well for one I want you two properly seated somewhere on the floor.” Keiji says coldly. He moves away and you and Kenma quickly take your places. On your knees. Eyes expectant.

“Kitty you look like she put you through hell” Keiji coos at Kenma, looking down at him while he strokes his cheek. You huff.

“I didn’t even-”

“Did I say you could speak sweetheart?” Keiji cuts off your attempt to explain and you know better to try any further. He doesn’t even need to look towards you to keep you in check “Kenma. Why don’t you tell me exactly what happened.”

“S-she got mad at me for being on my game so long that she rode me while my mic was on and wouldn’t let me c-cum unless I… begged with everyone on the line.” Kenma looks up at Keiji pleadingly. 

“And did you?” Keiji prods. 

“D-did I?” Kenma splutters in surprise. The red flush on his body seems permanent at this point.

“Well you obviously came. I can still see it leaking out of her all over our floor. So. Did you beg?” Keiji doesn’t let Kenma avoid his gaze, leaning forward with a firm grip on his cheeks.

“N-no.” 

“No. Instead you bit her.” 

Of course he noticed that.

“So let me see if I got this right. Instead of accepting your punishment like a good boy or conceding… you decided to take advantage of her kindness and my absence. God it’s like you want that pretty ass of yours lashed until you can’t even sit in your gaming chair.”

Kenma takes in a sharp inhale, trembling slightly. You gulp in turn, knowing that even though Kenma was worse, you aren’t safe from reprimand either.

Keiji fixes his sharp gaze on you and finally acknowledges you. “Did I agree to letting you punish Kenma?”

“No Sir.” You answer quietly, trying to keep the shivers threatening to expose your excitement at bay. 

“Take off your shirt and lie on the bed.” He sighs and begins unbuttoning his shirt. You do as you’re told, removing your oversized sweater as you climb onto the king-sized mattress.

“It seems that I’ve been too lenient with the both of you so really the fault lies with me. Allow me to take responsibility for that now.” Keiji says. He stands before you and takes in your form, surely noting how much you’re quivering before lifting and spreading your knees, leaving you on full display. He turns back to Kenma. 

“Kitty you should take this chance to properly apologize. Come clean up the mess you made.”

Kenma is just as compliant, quick to kneel where Keiji orders him right in front of your dripping pussy. He can’t even attempt a front, immediately capturing your clit in his mouth. You moan and buck a little at the sudden sensation.

“Easy there Kitty. Take your time.” Keiji chides softly. Kenma hums in response and opts to lick a long stripe against you instead. He tries his hardest to pace himself as he mouths you, gently pushing his tongue in between your folds. 

Keiji opens your bedside table and grabs a bottle of lube, squirting some on his own hand and onto Kenma’s ass. You feel the shiver that rips through Kenma as the cold gel runs down him. He takes a quick second to let out a shuddering breath but doesn’t dare look back. You, however, fully stare as Keiji gingerly begins fucking Kenma with his middle finger. Kenma quakes at the feeling and Keiji revels at the sight of you two and how your moans and his combine in the air and fill the room. 

“Baby you’re so shameless” Keiji mewls “taking so much pleasure from all the chaos you caused.”

You can’t even argue his point. Every thought of disagreeing had left your head the moment Kenma’s lips had touched your throbbing pussy. All you can do is whine in response.

Keiji doesn’t take his eyes off of you when puts his hand on the back of Kenma’s head and presses him down further. “Make sure you get all the way inside. Only bad boys leave someone else to clean up after them.”

Kenma simply whimpers in response and thrusts his tongue inside you, trying his hardest to move his hips to meet Keiji’s pace at the same time. You can tell Keiji’s purposely changing it to make it harder for him. You continue to tense up helplessly and barely contain your writhing with the very last bits of control over yourself. You know better than to cum right now but the waves of pleasure rushing over you and the sight Keiji fingering Kenma open are quickly clouding your brain.

“Please...” you beg, aching for release. Keiji looks up at you and smiles softly, an utter betrayal when his next words leave his lips.

“Kenma, stop now.” 

You both whine and turn your attention to Keiji, facial expressions mirroring each other. He pets Kenma’s hair and plants two quick kisses on his wet mouth. You sit up and pout.

“Keiji, Sir, please, I wanna cum so badly.” You beg, head spinning a bit from the sudden loss.

“Oh so now you acknowledge that I’m in charge.” He says and moves to kiss your cheek next, He places feather light kisses against your jaw as you whine and whimper in protest. Drawing close to your ear, he whispers icily “I have half the mind to fuck your pretty little throat so raw you wouldn’t be able to speak for weeks without regretting testing me. But I’m sweet, remember? So listen before I forget that.”

All your dissent dies in your throat and you stiffen. 

“Ready to be a good little girl for me now?” He inquires in his normal tone. It’s almost scary how easily he can flip between the two. All you can do is nod and accept the deep kiss he offers as a reward, moaning into his mouth. “Good, now get on the floor next to Kenma. Wanna see you two suck me off.”

You quickly do as you’re told and sit on your knees next to Kenma while Keiji slides off his pants and underwear. With Keiji sitting on the bed in between you, you let a thick glob of spit fall on his dick and work it down with your hand, slowly stroking him. Kenma positions himself and takes Keiji’s head in between his lips, hollowing his cheeks as he sucks him down.

“You two have been so naughty today and now look at you..” Keiji says breathily and pushes your hair back away from your faces. “Sharing my dick so nicely with each other.” 

You and Kenma kiss sloppily around the head of his dick, letting your tongues coat Keiji further in spit. Even though you and Kenma bicker more often, the one thing you two agree on without fail is that Keiji looks the hottest when you service him together. It’s how his eyes focus fully on the looks you give him, full of trust and devotion. How he’s always sure to praise equally as he grips whatever or whoever is nearest to gain some kind of grounding. 

“Neither of you is getting my dick today... but you can make each other cum. Should be enough, right? Since you two were so impatient you couldn’t even wait for me.” Keiji teases in between his groans. You try to shove down your disappointment as you use your free hand to reach for Kenma’s dick. You pump him in time with the rhythm you manage to form with Keiji’s large dick in your throat. Your eyes burn but you try to keep down your gags and moans as Kenma starts rubbing your clit fervently, wanting instead to clearly hear how he and Keiji sound. His touch is vengeful, a punishment for putting him in this mess and you nearly see stars from the feeling of his sticky fingers circling your most sensitive spots.

“P-please Sir, t-this time I really can’t hold it,” Kenma whimpers, looking utterly destroyed with tears clinging to his lashes and a trail of spit still connecting him to Keiji’s dick. 

“If you think you can keep servicing us while you cum then go ahead baby, but you better keep moving.” Keiji permits and it’s all Kenma needs to cry out and shoot out ropes of his cum all over your hand. He continues his ministrations against you and Keiji and soon it’s your own hips that are stuttering. You do not have Kenma’s level of control so you try to shove down your incoming orgasm. 

“I need you to cum Sir please, please please. I-I won’t last. Please I want you to cover us with your sticky cum” you beg. You look up at him from under your lashes as you go back to mouthing him and feel him throb in between your lips.

“Yes Sir pleaseee. Want your cum all over.” Kenma adds, his words slurring together. If he couldn’t focus on both speaking and pleasuring his partners he would simply put his all into the latter.

“Want my cum? Want Sir to make a mess all over those pretty little faces?” Keiji groans, bucking his hips into your mouth.

“God yes please.. Please!” Kenma continues and Keiji takes his dick out of his mouth to stroke himself over your faces. Kenma is steadily bringing you to your own edge and you both can’t help but open your mouths in hopes to catch Keiji’s cum on your tongue while you orgasm. With a shout, Keiji begins cumming, spurting all over you and Kenma. 

“Go ahead sweetheart, fucking cum right now” Keiji hisses and you convulse as you finally let go, holding onto his leg as your orgasm rips through you. It’s hard to focus on anything besides how easily Keiji and Kenma make you feel like you’re in heaven. 

“Now.. have we all learned our lessons?” Keiji utters once he’s down from his high. The sight of Kenma and you leaning against his legs for support makes his heart swell. 

“Yes.. Sir.” You two manage to get the words out. 

“See I knew my little ones were smart.” He coos gingerly moves to first pick you up and place you onto the bed and then Kenma before grabbing wet wipes. “Now let’s get you all cleaned up.”

[lucemferto]

Hey girl, don’t mind me, I just quickly went and rewrote Dream SMP Season 2.

I’m focusing on the big plot stuff from Season 2, which makes it really easy for me to make it good, because I don’t have to contend with all the hard parts like dialogue and scene pacing and stuff. As an additional challenge to myself, I try to change as little as possible. If I don’t mention stuff (like the Egg-Arc) then that means I’m fine with them the way they are.

I wrote this in an hour, so don't expect it to be good, pls.

Whether you agree or think this is trash, I'd be so interested to hear your thoughts!

ACT I

Fundy’s early arc with Ghostbur, Eret and Phil is great and should stay the way it is. It sets up the character relationships and potential for conflict that we can explore in the future.

Similarly, I wouldn’t change too much about the conflict during Exile with one exception: Both Tommy and Quackity don’t want to include Technoblade. Instead, they believe that they can take one Dream by themselves – this is important for Techno’s, Tommy’s and Quackity’s personal journey later on. In this rewrite, Quackity also didn’t found El Rapids, but instead recruited George & Sapnap to L’Manburg – because his stated goal is to make L’Manburg the strongest nation on the server, so why would he make a rival nation with a plotline that goes nowhere?

What’s also important is that it’s revealed that Dream has a spy in L’Manburg around here. Maybe Tommy confessed his burning of George’s house during a cabinet meeting and word still got out to Dream. Who knows, but it’s important for later.

Something big that I would change about this Act I is that I would give Techno an actual B-plot. As it stands, Techno’s early plotline was just “Grrr, I’m angry that Tommy would use me like that! Someone killed my cows and robbed me! L’Manburg will know my wrath”

3 weeks later

“Nevermind, I’m a pacifist now and live in the arctic”

Instead, we pick up where S1 left off. Techno is intent on destroying L’Manburg and instituting anarchy. During that time, he comes into conflict with Quackity’s henchmen (Fundy, George, Sapnap, etc.) to establish that L’Manburg could be an actual threat to him.

We also have some conflict with Phil. They’re old war buddies, but Phil’s son built L’Manburg and Phil himself is unofficially Tubbo’s advisor. I think them reconstituting their friendship will take up this early part until Tommy’s exile – it makes for a nice foil to Tommy’s and Tubbo’s friendship falling apart.

Technoblade also tries to recruit people like HBomb and Niki to his cause, but they’re hesitant, because, you know, he sent Withers to destroy their home. Not the best first impression. Techno is hurt, but convinced it’s because of L’Manburg propaganda and they don’t want to work with him, because they don’t see him as useful.

ACT II Part 1

Exile-Arc basically stays exactly the same – with one notable difference. When Technoblade comes to visit Tommy it’s not to mock him – it’s as a final attempt to convince Tommy to join him. It’s a first culmination of Techno’s character journey so far: His previous interactions with the citizenry of L’Manburg has left him shaken, but not shaken enough.

Tommy truly does need “The Blade” right now and he has no reason to further believe L’Manburg’s propaganda. So, by Technoblade’s inner logic, Tommy should accept.

But he doesn’t. Tommy viciously rips into Technoblade and gets very personal (he’s in a bad space, understandably) – Techno can play it off nonchalantly, but either the cinematography or some later moment shows us that he was hurt by this.

Nevertheless, he gives Tommy a compass that points to his HQ, showing us that he cares about Tommy, like he did during their early days in Pogtopia.

This is where we implement some big changes. The story of Technoblade and the Butcher Army becomes the A-plot, while the Exile becomes the B-plot.

It makes perfect sense. The Exile-Arc is a very inward-focused, almost a character study of Tommy and Dream. It doesn’t have a lot of big narrative movement – so the perfect time to execute on that narrative movement in the storyline that has a lot of moving pieces.

So, after Tommy chewed him out, Techno is hurt and meets with Philza. Techno then explains that for him anarchy always was the natural order of things – to fight for a world where only the strongest survive – but pursuing anarchy like that has left him empty. Philza then explains that anarchy should be more about helping people and building an equal community.

We’re all but stating a major thematic conflict of this storyline: Fighting those who wronged you vs. Helping those in need. All this while also exploring the philosophy of anarchy with Techno and Philza serving as symbolic stand-ins for some different thoughts on the matter.

So, while Tommy’s Exile is going on, Techno refines his approach. This goes hand in hand with Quackity using his henchman to turn L’Manburg into a totalitarian police state in order to root out Dream’s traitor (told you it would become important later).

This will be the main conflict here in the first half of Act 2. Quackity and Philza will play shoulder-devil and shoulder-angel respectively for Tubbo and Fundy, pulling them in different directions. Ghostbur also hangs around L’Manburg – a constant reminder for Tubbo of the most sanitized version of President Wilbur and the lofty ideas he stood for.

This is another big thematic conflict for this storyline – externalized in part through Ghostbur’s presence: When do the ends no longer justify the means? It also feeds into the motif of Tubbo and Tommy becoming like Schlatt and Wilbur respectively (even if that’s still mostly superficial).

During this political turmoil, Niki is getting into Quackity’s crosshairs. She opposes his policing and brutal methods. So Quackity really focuses in on her and she has to live with constant surveillance, searches, etc. Niki tries to talk to Tubbo about this, but he says it’s necessary to keep L’Manburg safe. Slowly, Niki grows disillusioned with L’Manburg.

It is during this time that Niki gets into contact with Techno and the two start to form a bond and helping the citizenry hold out hope during this time (I don’t know who would be the citizenry, probably people that don’t have their own storyline going on such as HBomb, Vikkstar, Lazarbeam, etc.)

And we can have a few lorestreams like that, where the conceit is that Techno’s sneaking into L’Manburg to help people and there’s actual tension.

All this culminates in Hog Hunt. Fundy sees Phil, Niki and Techno team-up. He confronts them after Techno left and Phil begs Fundy to not out them – but their divide has grown too deep (and we’ve actually shown that during Fundy’s streams this time).

Quackity has Phil and Niki incarcerated (L’Manburg has a prison now, it’s not as good as Pandora’s Vualt). Tubbo is deeply disturbed that Philza and Niki would betray him by working with the man that took one of his canon lives and finally gives the Butcher Army his presidential approval. Quackity was already prepared and the events of Hog Hunt play out as we know them.

ACT II Part 2

Again, plays out relatively similarly, except for one major difference: Tommy comes to Techno with the explicit purpose of asking for his help. Exile has left him really hardened, probably more so than we have currently.

This would a.) make Tommy a bit more proactive in his partnership with Techno and b.) actually gives some weight to Techno’s later beef with Tommy, because now it’s based on more than just some flimsy phrasing during S1.

Otherwise, this plays out relatively similarly – Techno and Tommy maybe share a few more character moments, just to drive home that Techno cares about Tommy. Also, none of that dumb keeping it a secret whether or not we destroy L’Manburg – that’s some contrived nonsense and I hate it.

Tommy knows that Techno wants to destroy L’Manburg and while he’s conflicted, he ultimately goes along with. Once he gets his discs back, everything will be over after all. The destruction of L’Manburg will have been worth it.

Part of the rising action will be breaking Phil and Niki out of prison instead of the petty bullshit about Techno’s items that he doesn’t need. This is where we have the initial confrontation between Tommy and Tubbo (and Techno doesn’t ruin the moment by being his worst self).

Other plot points include: Techno receives the Wither Skulls over the course of him and Tommy working together by some mysterious benefactor. This is after he and Tommy confronted Dream. He doesn’t tell Tommy who the benefactor is, even though he knows (spoilers: it’s Dream).

Meanwhile, Tommy, Techno, Niki and Phil are secretly rigging New L’Manburg with TNT a la Wilbur, just to really drive that comparison home. Niki is getting really angry; she has suffered enough and she’s really gonna get revenge.

One of her big moments of terrorism before the Green Festival is burning down the L’Mantree (maybe we can include some character conflict Fundy, so we have these two people who were once really close friends now so warped and torn apart by these two sides at war).

Meanwhile, Quackity has figured out that Ranboo was the traitor and is pushing for Tubbo to execute Ranboo for the greater good of L’Manburg. Tubbo is hesitant, but as there’s no moderate voice in the cabinet anymore, he concedes to the idea.

Finally, the Green Festival is here. This part is really … tough to rewrite, because you have to accommodate so many different character arcs, but I’ll try my best.

In a move not unlike during the Red Festival, Ranboo is revealed as the traitor and put in the execution cage (because those parallels). Tubbo feels really bad about it.

This is when Tommy and Techno start their assault and unleash the whithers. L’Manburg is under attack and we have the big fight between Tubbo and Tommy. We get the big shout-out “The discs were worth more than you ever were” and the ensuing epiphany on Tommy part.

Techno’s calling for him to explode the TNT, but he doesn’t do it.

Quackity is calling for Tubbo to execute Ranboo, but Tubbo has an epiphany himself and refuses. Both their personal conflicts are resolved here. Also, we have some nice parallelism between Quackity and Techno as Tubbo’s and Tommy’s respective bad influences.

Techno – understandably this time – feels betrayed and hurt. He and Tommy have their shouting match. Quackity tries to attack Techno, but during their match they accidentally trigger the TNT. Quackity’s hunger for power has created the grave of his ambitions.

(Niki is also pissed at Tommy and Fundy is fully distraught, because L’Manburg was everything he had left from Wilbur).

Dream steps out of the shadows and reveals that he was Techno’s mysterious benefactor. He gets his hands on the second disc and gloats to Tommy. The scene from Doomsday plays out only that Techno shows some stings of remorse for helping Dream accomplish what he wanted. (Quackity flees the ensuing chaos).

Dream tries to goad Tommy with the discs, but Tommy doesn’t bite, because he has resolved his Want vs. Need now. Dream is frustrated, but retreats for now.

ACT III

In the aftermath of ACT II, I think it’s very important to hammer home that this wasn’t a win for Techno, Niki or Phil. For that to work I think it’s important to make clear that Tommy’s and Techno’s bond was genuine and that they really cared for each other during the Bedrock Bros thing. Neither of them is happy for how this turned.

Niki is plagued by nightmares and sleeps in a prison cell like in the current canon. She stands in symbolic for the emptiness that vengeance brings. Phil is shaken from his talk to Ghostbur and he’s the one who brings up that maybe what they did wasn’t for the best.

Then Techno and Phil have a discussion about the nature of anarchy again, calling back to that earlier conversation at the beginning of Act 2. Techno also feels empty – his vengeance and the destruction he wrought left him no happier.

Meanwhile, Punz and Tommy are actually spending some quality bonding time. Thanks to the medium, they could simulate that pretty well. Punz actually gets attached and when Dream mentions his coup-de-grâce, the cinematography shows that Punz isn’t too happy about it.

Tommy and Tubbo prepare to fight Dream on their own terms. They know, they have to stop him lest he hurts the people they care about (this makes both of them a bit more proactive in the finale). Punz (as per Dream’s orders) tells Tommy where Dream is hiding. Tommy thanks him, oblivious that Punz is a traitor, but Punz feels bad. He has grown attached to Tommy.

During the Final Disc War we actually get two perspectives: One is Tommy’s and Tubbo’s as we know it (only without the constant “Your discs or Tubbo”-stuff) and the other is Punz’s. He has decided to help Tommy even though there’s nothing monetarily in it for him.

First, he goes to Quackity, but Quackity says that Tommy has betrayed him and L’Manburg and that he gets what’s coming to him.

In a last-ditch effort, he goes to Techno. Here’s where we resolve that thematic conflict (Vengeance vs. Charity) for the Techno-Butcher Army storyline: Quackity has chosen to perpetuate the cycle of vengeance (because he will be the villain in S3), but we want some nice character development for Techno.

Niki is against it and stays put, but Techno and Philza ultimately decide to go with Punz and the others to help Tommy.

Finale plays out the same. Stuff’s still awkward between Techno and Tommy/Tubbo; they haven’t resolved all their problems, but it’s a first step. Some good set-up for S3.

And that’s my basic rewrite. It’s long and probably not the best.

[corysmiles]

Caught (Again) Part 3.

Friendly Giant AU

part 1

part 2

cw//language, mentions of fatal vore (this part is extremely vague and short)

(Also I’m so sorry this is longer than the things I usually post but I hope you like it 💛)

———————————

“Wilbur please eat your food,” Phil hummed from across the table.

It had only been a couple hours since Wilbur woke up, and he was already becoming a problem. The moment his eyes opened he was yelling for help. They tried to calm him down but the hysteric man wouldn’t stop shouting about the giant.

“Dad stop fucking ignoring me! I know i saw-“

“Wilbur!” Phil snapped, “Please, eat your food. We’ll discuss this later, but you need to eat.”

Techno took a spoonful of the soup and nudged it towards Wilbur’s face. As soon as it touched his lips Wil sputtered and slapped it out of the older man’s hand. The spoon hit the table with a hard thud, interrupting the uncomfortable silence.

“Fucking stop it, I’m not a child!” Wilbur gasped.

Techno picked the spoon back up and huffed, “You’re really acting like it.”

Wilbur shot Techno a dangerous glare and shoved the soup bowl away from him. It sloshed out onto the table, spilling onto WIlbur’s lap.

“Dad the towns in trouble! It knows where we-“

Wilbur couldn’t even finish his sentence before a spoonful of soup was forcefully shoved into his mouth by Techno. Wil coughed and hit his chest but swallowed it down.

“Will I love you I really do, but you’re probably concussed,” Phil said softly, “And we’d know if there was a giant I promise. That’s our job. If the boys had been with a giant they would be dead, and look at them, not dead.”

Wilbur shot a dangerous glance at Tubbo and Tommy who just sat in silence at the other end of the table. Tommy’s face lit up with a sly smile as he turned to face their angered brother.

“I don’t know how they’re not dead. But I KNOW what I saw,” Wilbur snarled.

“You’re being stupid big man,” Tommy scoffed, “Of course theres no giant we don’t have a death wish.”

“Oh shut the fuck up Tommy,” Wilbur snapped.

“Don’t talk to your brother like that,” Phil scolded, “but Wil is right mate. Going into the forest was stupid of you two, you basically did have a death wish...I really don’t believe you two found a giant, but if one actually did find you, we’d be holding a funeral right now.”

Tubbo looked up at Phil with a mouthful of soup and nodded.

“You know how dangerous they are,” Phil said, “They aren’t people. A giant would slaughter you like pigs and not have a second thought.”

“Tell me more dad I’m intrigued,” Tommy grinned.

Phil glared at Tommy and sighed, “It’s not a joke Tommy. Giants are a serious danger, all we are to them is food.”

“Mhm,” Techno hummed.

“Giants are the closest things to the devil you’ll ever meet.”

“Mhm,” Phil agreed, “They wouldn’t even hesitate to eat kids like you, you’re like a fucking snack to them.”

Tubbo stared down at his soup while Tommy continued to egg on their father. The claims he made about giants got more and more extreme...but at least the soup tasted good.

“Can we please stop talking about this,” Wilbur snapped after a couple minutes. His posture was stiff, and the staring contest he had with their father was thick with tension. It didn’t last long though before Phil reluctantly gave up and motioned for him to eat more.

“I’m gonna uh..I’m actually gonna go to sleep now I’m pretty tired,” Tubbo exclaimed after a few minutes of silence. Tommy grabbed at his arm to get him to stay but Tubbo was already gone.

As soon as Tubbo got to his room he dropped down against the wall and pulled his legs to his chest. A deep breath cleared his mind.

At least Ranboo was okay, he thought. And Tommy was doing a good job of convincing Wilbur nothing happened. Even though Tubbo felt a bit guilty over lying to their brother, if it meant Ranboo was safe it would have to happen.

He would never forgive himself if he was the reason Ranboo got caught.

After an hour the door to his room slowly creaked open as Tommy entered.

“You feeling alright big man?” Tommy asked as he sat down beside Tubbo.

Tubbo sighed and leaned his head against his brother’s shoulder. He was thankful for Tommy’s help but it was still overwhelming.

“Yeah,” Tubbo whispered, “Just anxious...we were so close to being caught.”

A gentle hand rubbed against Tubbo’s back while he talked.

“Try not to worry about it,” Tommy sighed, “I’ll deal with Wilbur, and dad and Techno don’t suspect anything. It’s all okay...Are you gonna visit him tonight?”

Tubbo stared at the floor for a few seconds, just letting his eyes follow the natural grain of the wood. It was a habit he’d had since he was a kid. He used to make stories out of all the shapes and pictures he found hidden in the wood, but now all he could find in the grains were reminders of Ranboo- his eyes, his tail, his awful fishing rod.

“Yeah, I think I should,” Tubbo sighed, “He’s probably so worried right now.”

Tommy hummed beside him in agreement. The hand on his back pulled him closer against his brother’s side.

“Yeah, wouldnt wanna make Boob anymore anxious than he already is,” he smiled, “I’ll go with you- to make sure nothing happens of course. Wouldn’t want a giant to mercilessly kill you.”

Tubbo snorted and punched Tommy’s side, “I hope he slaughters you.”

“And eats me too right?”

“Obviously,” Tubbo snorted, “Like a snack.”

After a few hours when they were sure the rest of their family was asleep, Tubbo carefully cracked open their window letting them both jump out onto the grass below. It was still squishy from the morning rain, but further out in the forest it would hopefully be dry. The thick tree tops could be thanked for that.

Tubbo and Tommy got all the way to the walls with no issue. One at a time they climbed up the small ladder on the side until they reached the top. Tubbo sent his brother a grin before hopping off onto the pile of leaves they’d set up below.

Tubbo thought it was strange looking back at the walls. From the other side they looked so small, especially compared to the giant he actually did know...it was a good thing Ranboo had no intentions of getting into town. Or hurting anyone.

After a few seconds he was startled out of his thoughts by the thud of Tommy landing beside him.

Tommy grabbed his wrist as started to lead them forward. But they didn’t get very far before a heavy weight tackled into them from the darkness.

“Fuck!?” Tommy yelped as the boys were slammed onto the ground.

Tubbo desperately tried to push off whatever monster was attacking them until a familiar voice grunted in pain.

“Wilbur!?” Tubbo asked incredulously.

When the weight finally got off of them they were met by a very very angry looking Wilbur. His head was still bandaged from where Tubbo had hit him, but apparently he was fine enough to be up and moving.

“Where the fuck are you two going?” he growled.

Tommy brushed the dirt off his shirt and glared at their older brother.

“What the fuck-“

“No no no, what the fuck are you two doing? Are you fucking idiots?” Wilbur asked.

Tommy sighed and grabbed Wilbur’s wrist. His soft placating smile was all Tubbo needed to know what would happen next. It was his lying smile.

“Jeez Wil calm down. We followed you out here, are you lost dude? Are you ok-“

Wilbur slapped Tommy’s hand away with a shout, “I’m fucking fine, stop treating me like I’ve lost my mind! Now you’ve got two fucking minutes to tell me what’s going on or I’m telling dad you were out here again.”

“Not like he’d believe it,” Tommy snapped back.

Wilbur’s glare hardened as he marched forward, his finger pointed at Tommy’s chest.

“Oh so you fucking admit you’ve been lying to me, Huh? Really nice of you,” he snarled.

“Hey hey stop it!” Tubbo shouted. Immediately Wilbur’s head shot towards him with a deep frown. His finger still pressed against Tommy’s chest.

“You fucking too,” Wilbur growled, marching towards Tubbo, “Why are you out here what the fuck is wrong with you, I expect you to be smarter at least!”

“Hey!” Tommy snapped.

Wilbur shushed Tommy with a hand and glared back down at Tubbo. Even as sickly as he looked he was still intimidating, and Tubbo didn’t think he’d ever seen Wilbur that angry before.

“Tubbo you take me where you were going...or I tell dad,” he said slowly, “If you’re going to leave anyway I’m going too.”

Tubbo stared into the older man’s eyes and saw the liquid fear starting to swirl inside of them. Wilbur was angry but...there was more to it. It made sense given how often he had nightmares about the giant that had gotten into town. Of course, he’d be afraid of seeing another one.

“Tubbo let’s just take him home we can-“

“No,” Tubbo interrupted, his eyes didn’t leave Wilbur’s.

“No...he can come Tommy,” he said.

Immediately Tommy gasped in confusion and shoved Tubbo’s shoulder.

“What the fuck are you talking about you can’t just-“

“Tommy.”

“Tubbo it’s not safe it’s not-“

“Tommy.”

“Do you even care about him, what the-“

“Tommy!” Tubbo shouted.

Tommy’s eyes hardened into ice as he stared at Tubbo. But Tubbo knew what he needed to do.

“You can come Wilbur,” Tubbo said slowly.

Wilbur blinked, seemingly confused by how fast he had won, and nodded at Tubbo. He straightened his posture but his eyebrows still furrowed anxiously.

“Let’s go then.”

The three walked through the forest in a thick silence. Tubbo lead the group while Tommy walked behind with Wilbur. The previously furious man now just seemed terrified. His eyes flicked back and forth anxiously, and every broken branch or gust of wind made him flinch. Tubbo was sure that if he even said the man’s name he’d bolt the other direction.

“How long until we get there?” Wilbur asked.

Tubbo turned back to him and shrugged earning a glare from Wilbur.

“We’re almost there,” Tubbo hummed, “You should know, you’ve been here already haven’t you?”

Wilbur paused in his steps. The white noise of crickets and birds filled the silence.

“It was real...” Wilbur whispered. His voice so thin it almost blended into the sound of the wind.

Tommy’s eyes darted to Tubbo sending him a silent warning- he had to be careful. But they’d already gotten that far.

Tubbo locked eyes with his older brother and nodded. Immediately, Wilbur’s mouth squeezed shut, and for a moment Tubbo feared he would run until thankfully he fell back in line with the group.

After a few minutes they were at the entrance to the den. The warm air from inside washed over Tubbo like a comfortable blanket or a hug, but Wilbur didn’t seem as pleased. He could almost see the fear radiating off of Wilbur in waves as he stared into the dark cave.

“It’s safe,” Tubbo muttered, gently resting his hand on Wilbur’s shoulder.

Wilbur nodded and swallowed, letting himself be guided in by his younger brothers. Every step was torturously slow though since he kept having to stop to collect himself.

“We’re almost there Wil,” Tommy whispered at the fourth stop. He laid an arm around his brother’s shoulder and waited patiently until he stood back up, ready to walk again.

When they turned around the next corner the tunnel lit up- they were close now. Tubbo’s feet sped up like he was on autopilot and he had to force himself from running through the rest of the tangled pathways.

It wasn’t long before a familiar booming voice echoed through the last tunnel.

“Tubbo?”

Immediately a gasp escaped Wilbur. Tubbo turned to his brother who looked like he was about to pass out- his whole body stood deathly still and his eyes looked like they were a second away from rolling to the back of his head.

“What...” Wilbur heaved.

Tommy motioned for Tubbo to go on and sighed, “I’ll stay with him until he’s ready.”

Tubbo nodded and walked the rest of the way into the large cavern where Ranboo was curled up next to Michael. Meanwhile Tommy’s cow Henry slept peacefully against the stone wall of the den.

“Hey Boo,” Tubbo grinned.

As soon as the red and green eyes met his own they beamed with excitement. Behind Ranboo his giant tail thumped up and down happily.

“Wheres Tommy?” Ranboo asked.

Tubbo walked up to his friend and leaned against his giant arm. His body sunk into the soft fur and he could already feel the feint vibrations of a purr.

Tubbo took a deep breath and rubbed his hand into the giant’s fur, “He’s uh...well we have a guest?”

Ranboo tilted his head at the human before a loud gasp came from the other side of the den. Standing next to Tommy in the entrance to the cavern was Wilbur, and he looked horrified.

“You...it-“ Wilbur froze, “Oh my god.”

Wilbur’s shifted away, but before he could run Tommy grabbed his arm and yanked him forward.

“Fuck! Let me go,” Wilbur yelled, “Let me go please!”

Tommy shushed his brother while Ranboo stared wide-eyed at the man. His ears pushed flat against his head and Tubbo could tell by the way Ranboo’s fingers moved to wrap around him that he was anxious.

“Wil, he’s not gonna hurt you,” Tubbo said softly. To prove his point he rested his arm against one of Ranboo’s massive fingers- it didn’t seem to comfort Wilbur much though if his heavy breathing was anything to go off of.

“Wilbur breathe,” Tommy hummed, “It’s safe I promise. I don’t even like him, but you’re safe.”

“Yeah we’re not gonna let you get hurt big man,” Tubbo reassured.

Above them all Ranboo made a show of putting his hands behind his back before sitting back down.

“See not scary,” Tubbo smiled.

However, Wilbur still looked like he was going to cry. His eyes blinked frantically to clear away the oncoming tears while Tommy tried to calm him down to no avail.

Wilbur gulped down a deep breath, “How are you...”

Tubbo opened his mouth to continue before Ranboo’s voice echoed through the den again.

“I’m not gonna hurt you,” Ranboo whispered, “You can leave if you want.”

Wilbur’s head snapped upwards as he cowered away from the giant again.

“Look...I’ve been seeing Tubbo and Tommy for months now,” Ranboo said slowly, “If I meant to hurt them I already would have done it...And you’re their family, so why would I hurt you?”

Wilbur tightened his grip on Tommy’s arm, “You’re a monster...”

A soft hum came from Ranboo as the giant shifted to lay down on his stomach- his face now eye level with Wilbur.

“I know,” Ranboo agreed, “...But Im not going to hurt you. I would never.”

Meanwhile Tubbo walked over to Ranboo’s face and leaned against his cheek. With one finger Ranboo moved Tubbo to his nose and gently pushed against the human. Wilbur’s mouth hung open as he watched.

“Tubbo...” Wilbur exhaled.

Tubbo smiled at Wilbur and motioned for him to come closer. With a gentle nudge from Tommy, Wilbur reluctantly took a couple of steps until he was only a few feet from Ranboo’s face. His posture was rigid like a frightened animal ready to flee, but it was progress.

When nothing happened Wilbur took a couple more steps until he was face to face with giant. Ranboo’s massive eyes blinked once at the human before closing.

“How is this possible?” Wilbur whispered.

Tubbo shrugged and grabbed onto Wilbur’s wrist with a questioning look. When there was no resistance from Wilbur, Tubbo slowly placed his hand against Ranboo’s fur. Wilbur tensed up at the feeling but allowed Tubbo to guide his fingers through the thick strands.

“He’s different big man,” Tommy hummed from beside the two, “Not like the one you saw before.”

“Yeah, and he saved me yaknow?” Tubbo smiled.

Wilbur yanked his hand away when a slow vibration resonated from Ranboo’s body. Tubbo chuckled and guided Wilbur’s hand back down.

“He’s just purring dude,” Tubbo reassured, “It’s safe.”

Wilbur furrowed his eyebrows at the the giant with a small frown.

“See he’s just like a big dumb cat,” Tommy laughed.

One of Ranboo’s eyes popped open and glared at Tommy. Slowly, as to not startle Wilbur, Ranboo’s hand gently shoved Tommy to the side; Tommy huffed out some curses but didn’t seem too upset.

And for the first time that night Tubbo heard Wilbur laugh. It was soft and still a bit shaken, but it was a laugh nonetheless. Ranboo seemed to notice too and slowly opened his eyes to look back down at Wilbur.

Slowly, Ranboo pressed his face against Wil’s hand and whispered, “It’s okay”

Wilbur let out a small broken laugh, “This is...this is so fucked up.”

“Tell me about it,” Tommy scoffed.

Wilbur watched in complete awe as the giant reached out a hand to him. The clawed fingers were only an arms-length away but the creature made no move to grab at him.

Within seconds Tubbo had crawled up onto the outstretched palm and Tommy reluctantly allowed himself to be pulled up too. Wilbur’s face fell at the sight.

“I won’t move I promise,” Ranboo whispered, “And you don’t have to.”

Wilbur took a deep breath and slowly reached out his hand to the giant’s. His skin met Ranboo’s for a brief moment before he pulled away again. He couldn’t bring himself to be that close to that...that monster.

“I...I would like to go home,” Wilbur muttered, “Please.”

Ranboo smiled sadly at the older human and gently placed Tubbo and Tommy back onto the ground. Tommy looked like he was about to argue with Wil before Tubbo stepped in.

“We can go home Wil just...you can’t tell anyone about him,” Tubbo said sternly.

Wilbur met Tubbo’s hard gaze and let his eyes momentarily shift up to the giant’s. The red and green gaze was frightening, but it also held a deep sense of kindness.

After a few moments he let out a small hum of agreement and waved an anxious goodbye to the giant.

“I’m Ranboo,” the giant called out, “By the way.”

Wilbur paused beside his brothers and thought for a moment before turning on his heel. His eyes held a sense of determination as he walked back to the giant. With a deep breath he moved his hand to the giant’s own and pressed into the fur.

“I’m Wilbur,” he said after a few seconds of silence.

Ranboo grinned and gave him a small hum before Wilbur ran off back to the other humans. The giant watched as the three left- his tail wagged beside him happily. He was a little upset Tubbo wouldn’t be staying, but the meeting with Wilbur wasn’t that bad.

Ranboo knew it was hard for people to get used to him but he hoped eventually Wilbur would come around too.

[kuroopaisen]

tiny love || 11

➵ as tooru’s younger sister, falling in love with iwaizumi hajime was easy. iwaizumi ultimately decided to rebuff you. through a few strange twists of fate, you’ve ended up living with the very boy who’d broken your heart. but, perhaps it’s not as bad as you thought it’d be. he is the perfect gentleman, after all.

warnings: f!reader

wc: 1.5k

m.list |  ch. 10 ↞ ch. 11 ↠ ch. 12

“They should be ready,” Iwaizumi murmured. His breath tickled over the outer shell of your ear, yet another reminder of just how close you were.

“Stop doing that,” you whined, tilting your head away from him.

“Doing what?” He grinned.

You pouted as you poked at the eggs sizzling away in the pan with your slotted spatula.

Iwaizumi knew what he was doing. There’s no way he didn’t.

‘Let’s make breakfast,’ he’d said. You’d agreed on the promise – or more aptly put, the insistence – that you get some good food into you.

He’d failed to explain that ‘making breakfast’ meant frying eggs while a shirtless Iwaizumi wrapped his arms around your waist and propped his chin on your shoulder.

Sure, you were ‘together’ now, but that didn’t stop it from being a tad overwhelming. It wasn’t that you were uncomfortable, or that you didn’t want any of this to happen. It just still felt a bit like a daydream – a place you would’ve let your mind wander back in second year.

But it wasn’t a daydream, and it certainly wasn’t your second year of high school.

You weren’t going to let yourself lose all of this just because you couldn’t believe that it was really – finally – happening.

“You alright?” Iwaizumi asked, squeezing your waist gently.

“Hm?” You blinked yourself back to the present, hastily sliding the spatula under one egg that was turning suspiciously crispy at the sides. Thank God Iwaizumi liked his eggs well-done.

“You spaced out for a second there,” he said, a familiar troubled lilt to his voice.

“I’m tired,” you pouted as you slid the egg onto a plate.

“Sorry about that,” he chuckled. His chest rumbled against your back, reminding you once again that this was real. This was happening.

No, you weren’t used to it just yet. It was going to take a while.

“You should be,” you huffed.

“Although, I remember you saying you’d slept well.”

“Did I?” You said, voice perfectly innocent. “I don’t remember saying that.”

Iwaizumi laughed, pressing a gentle kiss to your shoulder. A shiver rippled through your body like an electric shock.

‘What am I going to do with you…” He murmured, nuzzling his head into your shoulder with a contented sigh.

You swallowed roughly, trying to calm your nerves.

Stupid Iwaizumi Hajime and his stupid face and his stupid broad shoulders and strong arms and his stupid husky voice and—

This is the first time you’ve thought that without the obligatory guilt. Usually, you’d berate yourself for letting your imagination wander that far into dangerous territory. But it’s okay now. Because things are different. You’re… well, you’re something.

It’s this strange in-between, something you haven’t given shape to. You’re ‘together’ now, but what does that mean? Do labels matter? Should you be worried about how Iwaizumi saw the two of you?

A familiar yet unwelcome smell brought you back to the present.

“You’re gonna burn your egg,” Iwaizumi muttered.

“Oh, shit,” you mumbled, hastily sliding your spatula underneath it. The egg fell flat on the pan as you tried to lift it up, the yolk spilling out and hardening on the cheap cast iron.

You let out a little whine, frustrating bubbling up in your stomach.

“I can have that one,” Iwaizumi hummed, one hand coming up to cover yours and guide the spatula back to the pan.

“It’s fine,” you sighed, letting him do all the work. With Iwaizumi’s help, you transported the egg to the plate with no further casualties.

You stared down at your work with derision. You’ve certainly done better. Although, you wouldn’t make a testament to your own cooking skills while Iwaizumi was in your presence.

But if he’s going to tease you about it, he makes no indication. He just hugged your waist tighter, his arms tensing around you.

He was so warm, so comforting.

He also seemed to only be half-awake. Although you couldn’t blame him. It was almost idyllic; a warm Saturday morning with nothing to do.

You usually spent days like this alone, wondering if you’d ever get over Iwaizumi Hajime.  

But not anymore.

✧ ✧ ✧

“Are you sure you wanna do it now?” Iwaizumi asked gently.

“Hm?” You blinked at him, something twisting in your stomach.

The two of you sat on the couch, Iwaizumi’s phone sitting on the coffee table with the same dour presence as an open casket.

You’d tried to ignore the lingering guilt hanging off your shoulders all day. You really had.

But after a day of doing not much of anything, you couldn’t ignore it any longer. Neither could Iwaizumi.

“Do we… want some time?”

“Time?”

It’s like you’re seventeen again, fresh-faced and innocent, about to have your heart broken by a boy you’d revered like a teen idol.

“He’s probably going to be pissed,” Iwaizumi said. “Do you need some time to prepare for that?”

Oh.

You’d expected him to say something far more wishy-washy; something about how you’d – or rather, he’d – need time to know if this was what he really wanted, only to string you along for a few weeks before deciding once again that you weren’t worth the trouble.

“Do you need some time to prepare?” You asked, your gut now churning. You’d known that this’d be scary, but the severity of it is still unsettling. You were just going to call your brother. That shouldn’t be scary – a bit nerve-wracking, maybe, but not scary. Not frightening enough to make your stomach collapse in on itself.

Iwaizumi paused, pressing his lips together.

What was he going to say? Was he going to back out? Was he going to tell you that this wasn’t worth it? Was he—

“No,” Iwaizumi said, shaking his head. “The longer we keep it a secret, the more guilty I’ll feel.”

Your heart stammered. Was he… was he actually going to go through with it this time?

You clenched your fists in your lap. God, why’d this have to be so complicated? And why couldn’t you just get over what happened all those years ago? You were still anxious, wondering if Iwaizumi was going to leave you in the lurch, if he’d choose Tooru’s feelings over yours without a second thought, if he’d—

“Hey,” Iwaizumi murmured, reaching over and taking your hand. “I’m not running away this time.”

He brought your knuckles to his lips and graced them with a gentle kiss. “I promise.”

Your words die in your throat.

You want to say something in response – anything, really. But you can’t. Nothing comes out. If there was a right thing to say, you didn’t know it.

Everything was different. Everything had changed.

This wasn’t the Iwaizumi you’d had your heart broken by.

He was a man now, all grown up.

“Should we call him on my phone?” Iwaizumi asked. “He’ll be angrier at me, so I should bare the brunt of it.”

Guilt twisted in your stomach – an old friend of yours, apparently. He was right. Tooru would definitely kick up the biggest stink with Iwaizumi; he’d probably invoke the ‘bro code’ or something like that or call him a bad friend for ‘taking advantage’ of his sister.

That wasn’t happening. You would fight Tooru on that one. But Tooru was unlikely to see it that way. Especially not at first; not when the fire was hot.

“We can call him on mine,” you murmured, the image of Tooru’s furious face sitting ill at ease in your mind.

Iwaizumi shook his head. “Nah. I’m the one he instructed to ‘keep boys away from’ you,” he smiled softly. “I don’t think this is what he meant.”

You blushed, capturing your lower lip between your teeth.

There could be rage directed your way. Something vague about ‘stealing his best friend’, probably. Was Tooru still that childish? Was he still prone to being petty? Or had his time in Argentina changed that?

“Let’s get it over and down with,” Iwaizumi sighed, opening his phone with his thumb.

You watched in abject silence and he flipped through his contacts, Tooru’s name sticking out like a stain on a white blouse.

Iwaizumi glanced at you, giving a decisive nod. You just nodded back, completely at a loss for words.

He pressed Tooru’s name and the phone sprung to life, each ring taking approximately three years off your lifespan.

No putting this off now.

“Iwa!” Oikawa’s sing-song voice bounced through the phone, joyful and naïve.

It filled you with dread.

It wasn’t right, having your brother’s voice strike fear through you. But at this point, it’s just another part of this comedy of errors.

You and Iwaizumi exchanged a look.

There’s such resolve in his eyes – a promise, finally, that he’ll stand by your side in this. That he’ll fight for the right to be part of your life in all the ways you both want. That this time, he won’t run.

You reached out and took his hand. It was a little clammy – perhaps the only indication of how nervous he really was.

“Hey, Oikawa?” Iwaizumi swallowed, his face a tad paler than usual. “We have something to tell you.”

[implexedactions]

Naga Enji - Halloween Collab

Hey! So this was part of a server wide event I did with other members of Lovesick! They’re all super amazing and you should DEF check out the others who took part!

I really like this one!

Warning for yandere content

Beta’d by best person:  @tod0oki

[Edited after posting]

---

You walked calmly through the forest, admiring the lush foliage. It really was a nice spot to spend the day. You came here a lot; it was relaxing and serene. The area didn’t have any trails, but it was an easy walk, regardless. Looking up, you noticed clouds were starting to gather. Hmmm, yeah, okay, better head back to the entrance. It was going to be late enough already; you didn’t want to have to deal with rain.

Before you could leave, you noticed a cave. It caught your interest, and you moved towards the entrance, it seemed to be quite deep.

“Hello, human.” A deep voice called out from the darkness.

“W-what?! Whose in there?” you shakily question.

“How much do you know of Naga’s?” The voice called back from the darkness, still not visible.

“Oh. This is a joke, right? Well, I’m not in the mood. And I’d suggest you head back soon, rain clouds are starting to form, and it looks like it’ll be bad.”

“Oh, but this is not a joke. I…I am real.’

A snake person emerges from the darkness, his human body has short jagged red hair and a scar near on his face. His human half ends around the waist, before turning into a striking red, orange, white, and black snake body, like a red-spotted garter snake. His torso and shoulders are broad, which makes his snake body huge. The diameter of his snake body is the same height as you. He is giant, over 10 meters long. You try to step back but fall instead.

“I…but…you’re…snake?” You stammer, failing to deal with the reality presented in front of you

“Naga, you uneducated primate. And I have taken a tremendous interest in you.” He says, slithering closer, eyeing your form.

“Me…? But…why?” you say, your feet finding purchase on the ground, trying to move away from him. Shoving you away from him, just a tiny bit.

He looks disappointed at you trying to move away from him. He reaches to grab your ankle, but you kick his hand away. He jerks away before looking you in the eyes, glaring at you.

“How dare you! Do you have no respect?! You should feel honoured that I chose to even approach you!” He says, looking outraged and annoyed.

“Why DID you approach me?” you say cautiously, realising how unfavourable this situation is for you.

“Well, I need to talk to my mat- I mean…visitor. Yes, you are my visitor. You stepped foot into my cave, that makes you my visitor.” He says hastily, slowly moving around your form, which was still lying on the ground.

 “I…uhhh…I need to leave, it’s going to rain soon, and I need to make it back to the forest entrance.” You try to stand up, but a large hand on your shoulder keeps you in place.

“Oh, I insist, please stay with me for the night. You deserve my hospitality” He says, still moving around you in a…circle.

Oh dear…

You force yourself up.

“Oh no, I need to make it back. I’ve got…people waiting for me, yeah! T-They’ll get concerned if I don’t show up!” It was a lie, but he shouldn’t know that.

He sighs, the circle around you now completed. His snake body is about as tall as your shoulders, so you can’t jump over it. He towers above you, looking down on you

“Uhmm…Can’t help notice that you’ve accidentally encircled me here. Can you let me go? I can come back to visit if you want? I promise?” you say, nervously looking around.

His face falls into an unimpressed bored look.

“Hmmph, I wanted to give you a few peaceful nights, to show you how nice life with me could be, but I guess you don’t want that. Such a shame, but you will grow to love it, I am sure.”

His arms grab you, despite your weak flailing, and he pulls you into his chest. You go quiet as you pray this is all a bad dream. He slithers slowly further down into the cave, the darkness growing. He seems to know his way, though. He brings your head up to his face and looks into your eyes.

“My name is Enji Todoroki, one of the strongest Naga’s, a fierce hunter surpassed by no one. You are my mate; I promise that I will treasure and protect you like no other.”

He arrives at the end of one of the tunnels. It is a large open semi-spherical area with a fire in the middle. He circles around the fire, and places you inside the circle, next to the fire.

“I know humans are not as resistant to the cold as I am, please, utilise this fire. The rain will not disturb us here.” He says, eyes trained on your every move.

You try to jump over his colossal snake body, but you struggle to get over it. He simply leans over and grabs you, before forcing you to sit down next to the fire. He leans in close, resting his mouth by your ear.

“You know, my mate does not technically NEED legs. If you would like to keep yours, I do suggest that you stay put.” He leans back, resting his human body on his snake half, keeping the coil around you complete.

“O-okay…I just…I don’t want to be here?” you say, pulling your legs up to your chest, crying into your arms.

He looks at you, anger surging through his veins. He grabs you by the shoulders and stares deep into your eyes.

“Why not! Do you think I cannot provide?! I am insulted! I have lived hundreds of years on my own! I am the most skilled hunter ever! Obviously I can provide for my mate!”

You quickly try to reassure him.

“No, I didn’t mean it like that! I’m sure you can provide for me!”

He scans your face, then hugs you and calms down.

“Of course, of course. You do not know me yet. You can live a great life here; I am certain of it. Just do not tell me I cannot provide for you. It is one of the most disrespectful things to a naga, okay? You did not know that, so I forgive you.”

“T-Thank you?”

“Do not fear! I will show you how comfortable a life you can lead in the coming years with me! You will be happy, I guarantee it!” He looks at you as if waiting for validation.

“But…I have a human life, and I have other human needs?” You try to put as much softness into this as possible, you think there is a chance he might let you go. His face darkens briefly.

“As I just said, do NOT suggest I cannot provide for you. You will be fine here, I can offer everything you require! Humans rely on a few critical things for survival, but all of these things will not be a problem for a naga like me! I will easily provide food and water; we have this cave for shelter from the elements. I can defend you, that takes care of safety! And as for your need for friends, family and community, well, you have got me obviously. And you will have the hatchlings and-“

“Wait? What do you mean hatchlings?!” you go stiff, staring at him with concern. You hope it doesn’t mean what you think it means

“Well, I suppose humans call them babies, and humans don’t lay eggs…but hatchlings sound so much better, no?” He seems to ponder it for a second while looking away from you.

“But I-“

“Oh wait, is your concern because of anatomy? Do not worry darling! I do not know much about human reproduction admittedly, so I do not know if we can produce children together. If we can, great! If not, I will just steal another’s hatchlings. The important part is having a family together.’

“I don’t WANT kids you freak! Especially with you!” He frowns, his eyebrows twitching. The silence in the cave is overwhelming.

“Do not say things one will regret. Like I said earlier, you do not need to have legs to be my mate.”

“I just don’t want kids!” His glare hardens as he stands up to his full height. Towering over you, looking down at you from his nose.

“Listen to me. I will not have my mate be some ungrateful brat. We WILL have hatchlings. They WILL all grow up to be fierce hunters like me and carry on my legacy! And you WILL stop complaining about it! It would be wise for you to accept that.” His eyes peer at your now sobbing figure.

His face softens, and his body down dips to your level. He reaches out and pulls you against his chest, trapping you against it with his arms. He slowly strokes your back.

“Shhh…Shhh…It will all be okay. There is no need to cry. Do you want some food? I can go get a cow for you? I know humans try to cook their food, so we could use the fire?” He looks down at you with empathetic eyes.

“I…I just want to go home! You realise I won’t be happy here, right? You should find a naga mate instead. Please!” Your eyes are watering as you meet his gaze.

“I love you, my dear. I watched you walk by every time you come to this forest. Your beauty, your gait, your personality. You were so appealing, I was trying to find the perfect time to introduce myself, but then I saw this storm, and you walked up to my cave and…I took a chance.”

He looks at you, but you stay silent.

“I meant what I said, darling. That I wanted your first night or two to be calm and happy. I think you would have adjusted so much better if you had just accepted my invitation. I will admit I came on a bit strong there, but I was so worried you would never come back. I just could not let you leave when you were so close to being mine.” His tears run down his face and drip onto your head. He wipes his eyes.

“Please love me, that is all I am asking. The hatchlings can…wait. It was wrong to bring them up so soon…just…please love me. I love you.” He gets his face close to yours, mere inches away from yours. His slit eyes looking directly into your circular eyes. You can see his eyes watering, as he scans yours.

“I can’t love you though…Especially not with the fact you clearly want kids. I have a life that I NEED to live. I can’t live out my life with you. Please, just let me go.”

“But I can provide for you! I can provide everything you need! No human can match what I can give you! I am certain of it!” His body seems to be heating up as his posture straightens and his arms around you get a bit too tight.

“But I-”

“Silence!” He roars, before looking down at your scared form. Confusion crosses his face before he cools down.

“Ah, I understand! You do not mean to be so rude and inconsiderate; you are just tired. It is understandable. Do not worry, my love, let us sleep.” He doesn’t let you speak as he uses his tail to put out the fire. Darkness returns as he slithers into a corner.

He forms a coil inward with his human body and you at the centre, his back lying against his tail. He crosses his arms, hands at opposite shoulders in an ‘X’ or ‘W’ like pattern, with you in the middle. This prevents you from moving, keeping you trapped against his chest.

“You will love me in time, I am certain.”

[little-lemon-lattes]

The Scheme

🌛Zelda Spellman x fem! reader

—Word count: 1.9k

— Triggers: Mention of murder and burning in a non-violent context

— Summary: We have part 2 to The Set Up! You and Zelda spend a blissful day together since kissing the night before, and make the most of being together before the mortuary fills with life- and typical Spellman scheming- again!

You were on Cloud-fucking-9.

The previous evening, you and Zelda had kissed. It had been truly extraordinary, even better than the few times you had allowed your mind to indulge in that kind of imagery concerning her. You had never felt that good with anyone before; well, minding that you had neither felt for anyone like that of which you had been trying to cover for the astonishing woman.

She currently lay in the grass next to you, cheek resting tentatively on your belly, as you both just watched each other in comfortable silence. Gosh, kissing Zelda had felt SO good that it had been hard to stop at just one. Like now. Her stunningly bright and beautiful green eyes were boring into yours, but you really couldn’t tell if she was trying to send you a signal or was just unwittingly that gorgeous on the daily. Probably the latter. You also had to remind yourself that, EVEN though you two already lived under the same roof, you would take things one step at a time together. The last 24 hours with Zelda had been like a dream, and the Spellman mortuary had a new air to it now that you knew where you stood.

That morning, you had woken just before dawn (which was much earlier than you preferred), likely still on a high from the feel of Zelda’s lips. Rather than lay there attempting to force yourself back to sleep, you rose from your pillow. Perhaps it was your always-lingering insecurity pulling some strings, but it suddenly seemed desperately important to you- then and there at 4:56am- that you find a way of proving to Zelda that she hadn’t made the wrong choice opening up to you the night before. Just one more bonus of Hilda’s disappearance that weekend being that the kitchen was inevitably free, within a few minutes you had decided to make a spot of breakfast to share. You would never admit it out loud, but you were also buzzing to showcase your culinary ability; of which had been somewhat hindered by the unspoken acknowledgement that Hilda was the kitchen witch of the house.

With that, you were out of bed and clothed in a black turtleneck and mom jeans, as you put the finishing touches on a French braid: all by 5:15. THe next two hours flew by as you whipped up black coffee, almond cake, black sausage, eggs, salmon, bagels, mushroom, and tomato. You were just laying out bloody-fleshed plums and yoghurt when you heard gentle footsteps on the landing above you. Smiling softly, you stopped to admire as the woman padded down the stairs, wrapped in a silky black robe and wiping bits of sleep from her eyes. She stopped dead as she spotted the food on the table, hand still raised to her eye.

“Surprise...?” you peeped.

Zelda’s hand flopped to her side as she tilted her head adorably, treating you to a giddy smile. And you were hopeless to try not to smile right back. That there was enough to have made the last two hours worth it. “

“What’s all this, y/n?”

“I, uh... breakfast?”

Zelda couldn’t help smiling a little more at the cute way you had made it seem like a question. “I see that,” she laughed, “but why?”

You forced an expression of mock pain onto your face.

“I am hurt, Spellman, hurt! Does there have to be a reason?”

All she did was raise her eyebrows in disbelief. You supposed it was probably best to build any chance you had together on honesty.

“Okay, FINE. I just... wanted to show you that last night wasn’t a mistake, in case you were having any doubts.”

Zelda trotted, cat-like, down from her post against the railing, and came to rest just half a metre in front of you.

“Why, there was absolutely nothing of the sort. I hardly slept a wink all night; your lips have something of a memorable feel to them, if I am honest.”

And this time, it was her that closed the space between you, snaking her arms around your waist to pull you closer. One long peck later, the bubblegum-pink shade of your cheeks matched hers in perfect unison, as if in competition.

Breakfast was sweet and long, spent thigh to thigh next to each other, chatting about all the things you had been too afraid to ask each other until that point.

The rest of the day was passed laying next to one another in the winter sunshine, beneath an age-old willow tree. After what felt like just minutes since you had arrived (but had really been hours), you pointed to the sky with the hand that wasn’t clasping Zelda’s.

“Look, the sun!”

You received a lazy “hmmm” in response. Twisting to face her on your left, you couldn’t fight your sigh of content. The High Priestess was laying with her eyes closed in utter bliss, the final rays of Sunday’s sunshine dancing across those glorious lashes.

“It’s setting, Zelda. Everyone will be back soon.” you murmured to her. It was as if you had thrown a bucket of ice over her. Cloud 9 disappeared with the snapping open of her eyes. The soft expression that had occupied her visage all day visibly hardened into her more familiar, stoic one. She leapt to her feet, snatching up the open novel beside her and swinging out her hand to you with force. Time and Space closed in around you the moment you took it, and, the next thing you knew, the two of you were outside the mortuary once more.

You turned to her sharply.

“What was that about?” you demanded. Standing silent for a moment, Zelda’s ears visibly pricked. After a few more moments, she seemed appeased, and swivelled to you. Her shoulders were tense, and you took note of her fingernails digging into her palm.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, “I didn’t mean to be so abrupt. I just... I am enthused about where you and I are headed, y/n, and I’m terrified that others may not share my enthusiasm. I want to enjoy things as they are at present for a while longer, before having to think about who needs to be involved in our business.”

It was understandable, you supposed, and admittedly: there was a certain appeal to keeping things 007-style, like that fantastic mortal film. You relaxed a bit, and instantly felt awful for raising your voice at her.

You reached for the woman’s shoulder.

“You’re right, Zelds. I understand.”

She looked unconvinced.

“Are you sure? You have every right to want to murder me right now, if you so wished. Although, only if you were to bury me in the Cain pit...” she added as an afterthought.

You had to giggle at that one.

“You’re safe for now, Zelda,” you teased, “now, come on! I need to find a good hiding spot for scaring the BANSHEES out of them when they get back!”

Hilda, Sabrina, and Ambrose literally stomped their feet in sheer disappointment when they arrived back at the house and hadn’t caught the pair of you locked in some form of intimate embrace.

“Aw man! What will I tell my friends?! I had Roz totally excited about y/n finally getting some action... Like, she seriously admitted that she had this big crush on her when she first met her; whiiiiich definitely earned a few looks from Harvey, to say the least. The take-away from it all is that we now know exactly how fragile that guy’s ego is, YIKES, is all I can say.”

All the while, Ambrose was muttering a consistent string of “fuck”s under his breath, and Hilda was deciding whether to scald Sabrina’s ass to Hades and back.

“Sabrina!” her aunt admonished in disbelief, “how could you be so careless?! If any of this gets back to your aunt Zelda, we should consider ourselves excommunicated from her presence for good!”  

All of them fought a cringe. Sabrina looked a bit sheepish.

Hilda turned to Ambrose.

“And what about you, mister? What’s with the constant profanities?”

Ambrose took a step back from his aunt, nobody was sure whether consciously or not. “Erm...hm. Yes. Well. I-” his sputtering was resembling a car trying to start up. Ambrose’s eyes suddenly seemed unable to reach past the witches’ knees.

  “-um. Damn. Hecate, yes, I have... just lost a particularly large sum of money to one Dorian Gray.”

Hilda’s eyes were ready to pop out of her head.   “I was so unequivocally certain that our plan would work! Now where I am supposed to come up with $1000?!”

He was a little manic. The only one of the three who seemed somewhat happy about Ambrose’s situation was Sabrina, sticking a finger at him. “HA! Now that makes what I did so much better!”

Her plum-coloured lips parted with glee, and without warning, her and her travel bag had disappeared. Ambrose made a furious mental note to pour formaldehyde in her evening tea for leaving him here alone. When he had finally built up the courage to look his otherwise cheery aunt in the eyes again, a flash of fear struck him at the murderous look in hers. A low growl exited her throat.

“Well,” she snapped, “I suppose there will be no more silly little attempts on our part to play Cupid.”

As quickly as it had started, her anger dissipated, and was replaced by a certain sadness. Her mouth raised just a fraction, into a tired little smile.

“ ’just thought that Zelds could do with something nice for once. We failed. It didn’t work.”

With that, she picked up her carpet bag and shuffled off up the stairs. Ambrose watched her go, now a lone silhouette in the entrance of their home.

Or so he thought. You waited until Ambrose had moodily trudged down to the embalming room before emerging from your spot in the broom closet. Sniffling a little from all the dust- those things hadn’t been flown for years, SO old fashioned- you felt a mix of emotion at what you had just heard. You hadn’t intended on becoming an audience to some type of scheme, and especially not one of which involved you.

At first, there was embarrassment. You hadn’t realised that your feelings were apparently so obvious! Paired with the fact that Zelda’s must have been too in order to warrant such a matchmaking scheme; along with that you had truly thought that you had done a superb job at keeping it all under wraps, you were left feeling a bit stupid. But then came the funny side of it all, imagining Hilda, Ambrose, and Sabrina sneaking about like the Pink Panther and holding secret meetings about your love life. And finally came the warmth, the realisation of exactly how much the Spellmans had grown to care for you- so much that they trusted you to love Zelda as much as they did.

The whole situation was entirely too much of an opportunity to just leave alone. Grinning with total delight and schemes cooking of your own, you rematerialised in Zelda’s study at the Academy. The loud CRACK that accompanied that particular piece of magic made the woman flinch. Her brow crinkled at the sight of you in front of her great oaken desk. She was a little taken aback, and (it delighted you even more) flustered to see you there.

“Y/n?”

“Zelda. I NEED to tell you what I just heard!”

A game was now afoot.

And your opponents weren’t finished yet either.

[cookie-run-kingdom-story]

The Battle for Fate!

(screenshots from Royal Mike!)

Opening Ceremony

Wizard Cookie: Finally! We’ve made it to the Pantheon of Starlight! Alchemist Cookie: The prize is a chalice that was dipped in the Nebula Spring! What properties does it have?! Sandwich Cookie: Anything poured into the Nebula Chalice will make the perfect drink for any sandwich! Bacon Cookie: A perfect drink? No! Bacon. Eggs. Milk. The perfect breakfast! ???: Hehe… Just look at ‘em… How pathetic.

Priestesses of the Stars: Starfruit Cookie! The opening ceremony is about to commence! Starfruit Cookie: Just a moment! I need to look perfect for this speech! Starfruit Cookie: I’ve never seen so many Cookies… I’m a bit nervous. Priestesses of the Stars: As High Oracle, we are sure you will do perfectly fine. We believe in you! Starfruit Cookie: Right? Right! I can do this. There’s nothing I can’t do. Let’s start this tournament! ???: The festivities will begin soon. Let us commence with our plan.

Licorice Cookie: No one but Dark Enchantress Cookie deserves the Nebula Chalice! Pomegranate Cookie: To present it to our Master, you will need to claim it first. Dark Choco Cookie: Can that cup truly negate starlight? I’ve also heard tales that it also reveals the whereabouts of ancient legends… Pomegranate Cookie: It is most very likely. The chalice is said to reveal everything the stars can see. Pomegranate Cookie: I will approach Starfruit Cookie. She will prove most… useful in learning about the chalice. Licorice Cookie: Hehe…! Not unless I find it first! Dark Choco Cookie: ...Let’s get moving. We don’t have much time. Starfruit Cookie: Welcome, one and all, to the first tournament of the stars, the grand Battle for Fate! Starfruit Cookie: Only the most honorable and skilled can claim the Nebula Chalice.

Wizard Cookie: I’ve been practicing my spells just for this moment! Sandwich Cookie: I’ve been making and serving sandwiches, plus running everyday! No one’s better prepared than me. Bacon Cookie: BEHOLD! New cooking utensils! With these, everyone will be too impressed with my cooking to run! Alchemist Cookie: HA! With my new concoction, that chalice is as good as mine! Licorice Cookie: Hehe… none of you stand a chance. I’m gonna be the one to claim the Nebula Chalice! Starfruit Cookie: Let the Battle for Fate begin!

The Vision

Starfruit Cookie: The tournament must be in full swing by now. I wonder if it’s going well! Starfruit Cookie: Oh? Who’s that…? I’ve never seen that Cookie here before. Hey, you can’t just barge in here! Pomegranate Cookie: My apologies. I was led here by a mysterious power. Starfruit Cookie: You felt the powers of starlight...? The other priestesses here can’t really sense them though… Starfruit Cookie: You’re not like the other Cookies, are you? What’s your name? Pomegranate Cookie: I am Pomegranate Cookie. I come according to the will of the one I serve. Pomegranate Cookie: Upon hearing of the Battle for Fate, I decided to see it with my own eyes. Starfruit Cookie: So! What do you think of the tournament and festivities so far? Pomegranate Cookie: The opening ceremony was quite the spectacle indeed. And this temple’s beauty is quite grand. Pomegranate Cookie: You must have poured your heart and soul into preparing for this occasion. Starfruit Cookie: Well, it wasn’t easy! But, after all, it’s me! I knew I could handle it. Pomegranate Cookie: The grand prize is also amazing. I had only heard of the Nebula Chalice in myths and legends. Starfruit Cookie: Exciting, isn’t it?! With the chalice, the stars can show you everything! But only once though… Starfruit Cookie: The High Oracles of the past kept it hidden away, but with it we can let every Cookie know about our temple! Pomegranate Cookie: Such wise judgment for one so young. It is thanks to your decisions that I am graced to be here today.

Starfruit Cookie: So I was right! Hehe, this was a great choice. Priestesses of the Stars: Starfruit Cookie! There is something you must come check at once! Starfruit Cookie: Oh, duty calls! It was nice meeting a Cookie just like me! Pomegranate Cookie: As did I… As did I. Priestesses of the Stars: That was excellent! Starfruit Cookie, everyone is so very impressed! Starfruit Cookie: I’m so glad that everyone is enjoying the tournament! We should do this every year! Priestesses of the Stars: As today’s games are over, we will take our leave. Starfruit Cookie: Everyone’s gone, right…? I should pop over to the Nebula Spring. Starfruit Cookie: The sky is especially clear today. I should be able to read the stars without any problems! Starfruit Cookie: Stars, please light my path! Grant me a vision to help me bring peace unto our world! Starfruit Cookie: I will accept your guidance, no matter how sweet or bitter it may be.

Starfruit Cookie: Hmm… Not even a single ripple. Maybe the stars don’t want to talk tonight... Starfruit Cookie: Oh! OH! The Nebula Spring is shining! A vision has been granted! Starfruit Cookie: What’s this… the stars are… They’ve gone dark?! Starfruit Cookie: Is something terrible going to happen with the tournament?

A Fateful Meeting

Licorice Cookie: Argh..! Where’d they hide that chalice?! I’ve been looking everywhere! Licorice Cookie: I need to find it before Pomegranate Cookie…! No, not that. Nope, this isn’t a chalice… Dark Choco Cookie: Wait… what was that noise? We need to move. Now. Licorice Cookie: Oh-ho! Now that thing definitely looks like a chalice! Could it be? Licorice Cookie: Psh… It’s just a glass cup… Nope! Don’t need you! Priestess of the Stars: Have you lost something? Licorice Cookie: No! I-i-it’s nothing! Go away! Priestess of the Stars: Competitors of the tournament are not allowed here. Are you lost?

Dark Choco Cookie: ...Yes. Priestess of the Stars: Follow me then. I will show you the way. Licorice Cookie: OK, OK! We’re erm… right behind you! Pomegranate Cookie: Now that we are all here… Have you made any progress? Licorice Cookie: Well duh! While you were chatting away with that Cookie, I was busy searching the entire temple! Pomegranate Cookie: Good. I too have made progress. Licorice Cookie: It’s probably gonna be quicker to find it ourselves. Starfruit Cookie isn’t just gonna tell you where it is… Licorice Cookie: Just you wait! I’ll be the one to find it! I’m gonna make this mission succeed! Pomegranate Cookie: You are welcome to try.

Starfruit Cookie: What do I do... Priestesses of the Stars: Starfruit Cookie. Is something on your mind? Starfruit Cookie: Oh, it’s erm… I was just curious about how the festivities are progressing! Priestesses of the Stars: All Cookies are running and giving it their all. Would you like to watch the games? Starfruit Cookie: No, it’s alright! I can go watch by myself. Starfruit Cookie: That vision… What did it mean… What are the stars trying to tell me?

Pomegranate Cookie: Have you come to watch the tournament as well? Starfruit Cookie: Pomegranate Cookie! It’s good to see you again! Pomegranate Cookie: There seems to be a great weight on your shoulders. Starfruit Cookie: Oh, it’s just… I was thinking about something and came out for some fresh air. Pomegranate Cookie: Is there anything I may assist you with? Pomegranate Cookie: I too have experienced the burden of responsibility… The burden of wielding power. Starfruit Cookie: Oh… You too? Pomegranate Cookie: I must confess, I cannot say that there were never moments like this. This burden… we are destined for it. Priestesses of the Stars: High Oracle Starfruit Cookie! The next round of the tournament is about to begin! Starfruit Cookie: OK! I’ll be right there! (I wanted to talk a bit more, but…) Pomegranate Cookie: I await the day in which we can meet once again. Priestesses of the Stars: Starfruit Cookie! Where have you gone?! There’s trouble! Starfruit Cookie: Trouble? What sort of trouble? Priestesses of the Stars: High Oracle! This also requires your attention! Please, please! Starfruit Cookie: OK! I’m on my way! Priestesses of the Stars: Starfruit Cookie! We need your guidance! Please, oh Oracle! Starfruit Cookie: So many things require my attention…! But I’m only just one Cookie... Starfruit Cookie: This isn’t the festive tournament I wanted...

Starfruit Cookie: I wonder if I can meet… Oh! Pomegranate Cookie! You’re really here! Pomegranate Cookie: You seem tired. Is something amiss? Starfruit Cookie: I’ve been so busy that my dough has been hardened more than usual…! Pomegranate Cookie: Leading this grand tournament on your own must take quite a toll. Starfruit Cookie: I’m beginning to think this was all a mistake… Just a bit! Pomegranate Cookie: You are spreading the word of the Pantheon of Stars, of its devotion to peace and prosperity for all Cookies. Pomegranate Cookie: Your decision will have helped and inspired many Cookies. Quite many... Starfruit Cookie: Thanks, Pomegranate Cookie. I really needed to hear that. Pomegranate Cookie: You may confer with me anytime. I am ready to offer an ear. Starfruit Cookie: The next round will begin soon! Starfruit Cookie: Remember to attack and defend at the same time to gain the upper hand! Alchemist Cookie: This is my forte! I’ve concocted a few solutions for the perfect attack and defense! Wizard Cookie: I’ve got a spell or two that’s just what I need to win! Sandwich Cookie: I just had a sandwich. Yummy! It was so nutritious, I think I can beat every Cookie here! Bacon Cookie: If I win… FREE BACON FOR ALL!

Licorice Cookie: Oh, stop yelling! I’m gonna be the one to beat all of you! Bacon Cookie: You haven’t even run in a single game yet! Licorice Cookie: HMPH! I didn’t run… er… by choice! I’m on an IMPORTANT mission! Licorice Cookie: If I show you my true power, you’ll all get scared and run away! Bacon Cookie: We don’t care what your mission is. And you’re definitely not scary. Licorice Cookie: Just you wait! Victory will be mine! Dark Choco Cookie: Did you forget why we’re here in the first place…

Sworn to Secrecy

Starfruit Cookie: Pomegranate Cookie! I’ve missed you! Starfruit Cookie: Thanks to your advice, I feel SO much better. Pomegranate Cookie: How fortunate… But I sense you’ve still an ounce of foreboding thoughts. Starfruit Cookie: Wow, you know me so well…! Starfruit Cookie: Erm… it’s just that… Nah, never mind. Pomegranate Cookie: Please, speak comfortably. I am sure I will understand. Starfruit Cookie: I want to… But… Pomegranate Cookie: You and I are the only Cookies who can understand each other. Starfruit Cookie: You’re right… Starfruit Cookie: Let’s head somewhere else. Somewhere more private…!

Starfruit Cookie: A few nights ago, the stars… Their light was consumed by a veil of crimson and shadow. Starfruit Cookie: I’m worried something might go wrong with the tournament. Pomegranate Cookie: I see. This vision must have been quite shocking. Starfruit Cookie: I wanted a grand vision and I got one, but… I didn’t expect it to be some* dark and grim.

*actual text

Pomegranate Cookie: ...I believe the one I serve may be able to assist you. Pomegranate Cookie: She is wise and wields a cosmic power that none can stand against. Starfruit Cookie: Really?! That’s amazing! Thank you! I’m glad I shared this vision with you. Starfruit Cookie: I’m really glad we’ve become good friends!

Pomegranate Cookie: But about this vision… Is the Nebula Chalice the only such treasure in existence? Pomegranate Cookie: I was under the assumption visions were granted only by the chalice itself. Starfruit Cookie: Well, you see… Oh, before that… You need to keep this a secret! Starfruit Cookie: In the middle of the temple is the Nebula Spring, where sacred waters are blessed by the stars! Starfruit Cookie: The Nebula Chalice itself only holds a fraction of the spring’s true power! Starfruit Cookie: At the spring, if I pray and say “Stars, please light my path”, the stars grant me a vision. Pomegranate Cookie: ...I see. Thank you. I can ensure you that this secret is safe with me. Starfruit Cookie: We’re best friends after all! It’d be nice if we can chat like this after the tournament ends… Pomegranate Cookie: This friendship is special to me as well. Though, I am destined to follow in my Master’s path… Pomegranate Cookie: I will always remember this day and how you have helped me.

Licorice Cookie: Ugh… I’m gonna win this time! Bacon Cookie: What’re you, a broken blender? You keep on grinding with no results! Alchemist Cookie: You kept muttering about winning… So… now what? Dark Choco Cookie: Licorice Cookie. Pomegranate Cookie is requesting our presence. Licorice Cookie: Can’t you see I’m busy?! I have to compete! Dark Choco Cookie: She’s found it. Licorice Cookie: WHAT?! H-h-hey, all of you wait here! I’ll be right back!

Licorice Cookie: The Nebula Spring? Really?! Pomegranate Cookie: Revealed by Starfruit Cookie herself. Come, follow me. Pomegranate Cookie: This is the Nebula Spring… Indeed, the waters flowing from here are blessed with magic. Licorice Cookie: Is this it…? Really? It seems so… small. So how do we get the stars to talk? Dark Choco Cookie: We don’t have time. There is no telling when some Cookie might walk in. Licorice Cookie: Er… ahem. You heard him. Well, get on with it, Pomegranate Cookie! Pomegranate Cookie: May the Darkness feast on this spring’s power...

Licorice Cookie: Is that it…? Hehe. Well, that was easy. Psh! Power of starlight… *mutter mutter* Pomegranate Cookie: Now then. Let us see what the Nebula Spring reveals. Pomegranate Cookie: Stars… please light my path… Show us the Cookies of legend and myth... Dark Choco Cookie: ...So, it’s true. The spring can show us where the Cookies of legend are... Licorice Cookie: Starfruit Cookie is really gonna regret everything, isn’t she? Hehe! Pomegranate Cookie: While we remain grateful for her… cooperation. Priestesses of the Stars: Wh-what are you doing?! Dark Choco Cookie: It’s time to leave.

Priestesses of the Stars: Stop! What are you doing to this sacred place?! Licorice Cookie: Argh! Why are they so persistent?! Pomegranate Cookie: Should you not be reporting what’s happened here instead of pursuing us…? Dark Choco Cookie: Just a bit further. I have scouted a place where we can hide. Licorice Cookie: Faster! FASTER! Sandwich Cookie: Not bad! Not bad! Everyone’s really skilled! But the winner is decided at the very END! Wizard Cookie: Hey, has anyone seen Rags- I mean, Licorice Cookie? Bacon Cookie: Psh! He probably got scared and ran away. Alchemist Cookie: Look! Starfruit Cookie just came out of the temple! Is it time for the final round?

Closing Ceremony

Starfruit Cookie: I extend my greatest appreciation for all Cookies who have made it this far! Starfruit Cookie: And that’s that! The Battle for Fate is over! Starfruit Cookie: Phew! I’m really glad it’s over… But that sure was fun too! Starfruit Cookie: Now that I think about it… Nothing bad happened during the tournament. Starfruit Cookie: Maybe the powerful Cookie that Pomegranate Cookie knows secretly helped out!

Priestesses of the Stars: High Oracle! Starfruit Cookie! Something terrible has happened! Starfruit Cookie: What’s going on? Priestesses of the Stars: Some strange Cookies have infiltrated the chambers of the Nebula Spring! Starfruit Cookie: WHAT?! Starfruit Cookie: No… NO! The Nebula Spring has been corrupted by some crimson magic... Priestesses of the Stars: We’ve received word that three Cookies were involved! Starfruit Cookie: Who… Who did this... Priestesses of the Stars: A Cookie with a dark cloak and a raggedy Cookie with a scythe were rummaging through the temple. Priestess of the Stars: I… thought they were participants who got lost in the temple. My deepest apologies...

Starfruit Cookie: What do I do… Could Pomegranate Cookie help me with this…? Priestesses of the Stars: And another Cookie was with them. A Cookie dressed in red and adorned in pomegranates. Starfruit Cookie: !!! Are you… sure? Priestesses of the Stars: Quite sure! The Cookie in red was the one standing closest to the spring! Starfruit Cookie: No, it can’t be! That Cookie… she’s… She’s my greatest friend… Starfruit Cookie: I thought she understood me… I told her everything… She is… my friend… Starfruit Cookie: Could it be…? No… No, it can’t... Starfruit Cookie: That vision wasn’t about the tournament. If only I had not told Pomegranate Cookie... Starfruit Cookie: It’s all my fault… The vision came true because of my mistake...

Dark Choco Cookie: We’ve managed to lose our pursuers. Let us leave. Licorice Cookie: The power of Darkness is going to consume the world! HAHAHA! Pomegranate Cookie: Everything is proceeding as the Master planned...

The Aftermath

Starfruit Cookie: Stars… Oh, great stars, please light my path! Starfruit Cookie: I will gladly sacrifice my powers if it means restoring the Nebula Spring! Priestesses of the Stars: Starfruit Cookie! Please! You must rest…! You cannot go on like this! Starfruit Cookie: No… This is all my fault. I must fix this… I have to. I cannot rest until… Starfruit Cookie: I am nothing… I was always nothing. I am no longer fit to be the Oracle. But I will remain and protect the temple. Starfruit Cookie: So let me fulfill my responsibility, one last time…! Starfruit Cookie: No… The stars have been silenced… There is no answer. Starfruit Cookie: !!! My staff is… glowing?! The stars! The stars are with me!

Starfruit Cookie: Wait… Huh? What? Who are these ordinary looking Cookies? Starfruit Cookie: Oh, great stars… Are… are these the Cookies who will save the world from the Darkness…? Starfruit Cookie: This means… A flicker of hope still lives!

[alfredosauce50]

Island Escapade [Ex-con! 2p! America x reader x Denmark] 07

Island Escapade - 07 - She's my collar Wordcount: 2, 877 The reader is referred to as she/her.

"Mathias is missing."

"Save your jokes for dinnertime, Allen. It would've been better to laugh in front of him." You snorted. Without sparing him so little as a glance, you leaned forward to crush a few cloves of garlic under the blade of a knife. He stood at your side with his eyes narrowed into a troubled glare—you could brush me off every other time, just not today.

"I'm not kidding, dollface." He set down the missing man's phone on the countertop in a light clunk. "He's been gone since noon. Dude went awol the second he finished eating. And it's nearly seven."

You lifted your gaze to the device, then to him. It wasn't the first time he did something like this, but now that he mentioned it, his cloud of worry seemed to float right over.

"... Hm. That's weird." Giving your hands a quick wipe, you marched out to the porch overlooking the surrounding beaches. Allen appeared from behind. "You don't think he went to someone else's house, do you? It's getting dark... And the rain's setting in."

"He's not stupid enough to not bring an umbrella, right?" He asked.

One of your eyes narrowed in thought. "Doubt it." Redirecting your line of vision to a spot on the fencing, your words manifested into reality when you saw that your umbrella was untouched. Immediately, you frowned. "What on Earth could he be up to?" The other shrugged with his lips pursed together.

"Maybe he's trying to get your attention by making you worry."

You cracked your neck. "Well, he always was one for theatrics. He'll probably come back soaking head to toe to be dramatic."

You couldn't put it past him to do something like that. Again.

"Ouch." Allen chuckled, following you back inside. "You do this every time he runs off?"

"Yeah, because I'm usually right." Mathias was either straightforward and demanding or didn't say anything at all. Like being dramatic.

There was no compromise whatsoever, but you doubted he knew what the word meant. The man had the communication skills of an egg. "But if he proves me wrong, we have something to be scared of."

Making your way back to the kitchen, you scraped up the chopped-up vegetables and dropped them into a frypan for a satisfying sizzle. Despite your silence, the worry was visibly setting in your downcast eyes. Even he could see it, but he never brought it up until it was time to eat—the last and ultimate test.

If he was late he might as well have been dead.

He never missed dinner or any meal for that matter. And yet, there you sat, halfway through your stirfry. Allen already finished his, now watching you with his cheek resting on his hand. "... You good?"

His brows were slightly furrowed.

You kept your head down to prod around your plate absentmindedly.

"Yeah... He’ll turn up."

As the minutes droned by without him, the plate next to yours grew colder and colder. What was once hot and piping had cooled off and hardened. The generous serving of what you made—double of what you had—was no longer as appetizing as it used to be.

"Listen. He's not showing up."

He watched you glance up slowly. What he blurted was disheartening, but he couldn't take how depressed you looked.

"... You're wrong. He always shows up." You murmured faintly, unable to return his steely gaze. As you continued, your trust in your own words completely disintegrated.

"It doesn't matter how late it is."

Your stubbornness was just a front. Allen saw right through it. Digging his hands through his dark maroon hair, creases formed between his eyes as he hesitated to continue. But he had to do what had to be done. "Sorry, it had to be me, doll."

He raised an index to point at himself. "Look me in the eye and tell me he's gonna show up." You didn't budge. "That's what I thought. And what did you say his bedtime was? Nine. It's nearly eight."

A brief silence fell as you both shared the same thought.

Mathias was like a kid.

Allen felt worse to know you used to date him. Even now, he could see you worrying yourself to death, but you made no effort to admit it.

"Look, if you’re scared, then you’re scared. But he’s a hardy guy, ain’t he? If I can fit into his clothes, then he’s got a good chance of surviving without eating his veggies for the night."

There it was—the glimmer of hope in your eyes as you lit up to what he said. It was exactly what you needed to hear. The comfort you couldn't bring yourself to ask for. After all, Mathias's absence impacted the atmosphere more than you and Allen cared to confess.

But for you, it hurt more than you could fathom.

A few hours later, there was still no sign of him appearing. You were patient, however, and continued to sit in the living room. But desperate was the better word as you fixated on the door. Where was he? Was he okay? The muffled sound of a toothbrush stopped, which was followed by the hum of the faucet turning on.

Out walked Allen in his pyjamas. His underwear. You had long given up on telling Mathias to not do it. And you were too exhausted for Allen's antics. "You should get some sleep, doll. We'll sort this out tomorrow." The couch dipped to your right. "Or do I gotta sit here all night too?"

You bit your lip for a deep frown.

"No, you go to sleep. I'm not letting you do this because my stupid ex can't look after himself." A sigh fell from your lips. "You're not responsible for anything, and I wouldn't be able to sleep, anyway."

He rose a brow. "Okay, fine. But who said you had to be responsible?"

"Me."

Allen clicked his tongue. "I know you care about him, but I have to be frank." He turned to you with a softened gaze. "There's nothing you can do but wait til' morning. We can look for him when we can actually see."

Why did he have to put it like he was already dead?

You practically launched yourself into his arms, much to his surprise. Tightening your coils around him, it didn't take long for you to feel his strong arms around you. He wasn't used to being appreciated, but damn, did it feel good. "Aw, haw haw. Gimme some. Let's hug it out."

"If he comes back alive, I'm gonna kill him." Your voice was no higher than a whisper to stop it from cracking. When you realized what you were doing, bile rose in your throat.

"You can kill him all you want when he gets back, and he will." Allen pet your hair softly. Given the height difference, he could rest his chin on the top of your head. "Don’t cry over that dumbass. He doesn’t deserve it."

"But you don’t understand—" Pulling away to rub away some stray tears, the effort ended up in vain as more streamed down your face. "—we were still fighting today."

His eyes drooped in sympathy as you finally spilled. "Why did he have to fucking disappear when I was already ignoring him? He was trying to talk to me for days but I never even looked at him...!"

You sucked in a sharp breath to hold back a sob, then to replace it with a laugh. "About how good his cereal was, or how bad the weather was—or, or a funny video or something just as stupid."

All Allen could do was dab tissues over your face, so he huffed out a soft sigh. Hearing it only made bottling everything in harder. And it showed in the tremble that seized your body.

"C’mon... Don’t be like that." He pulled you in again, unable to bear the sight. Hearing it was bad enough.

God, were you a mess.

He’d never say it out loud, but it turned him on more than anything. Hugging you tighter as the warmth flurried more in his chest, he felt something wet spread over his tank. You were so vulnerable, and to be here when you needed someone—he never felt closer to you than now.

"I'll be however I wanna be. This is just how it's always been with him." You admitted bitterly through a glare. "He pulls something, but I'm the one who ends up feeling bad. I can’t win arguments! And you have no idea how many times it’s happened."

Never had he witnessed such raw honesty and ugly emotions from you. Allen just never imagined Mathias to be the cause of it. But then again, you had a history with him he was never privy to.

For just a moment, he felt like crying too.

"You gotta stop beating yourself up. Shit happens. But I promise he'll show up. I got a feeling we aren't getting rid of him this easily."

You sniffed. "You really think so?"

"I know so."

The next morning, you were awakened by the buzz of your phone. Rummaging under your pillow to find the source of those obnoxious vibrations, you pulled out the device to find yourself staring at the line, "No caller ID" across your screen. With little hesitation, you answered it. Inside, you prayed and prayed it was who you thought it was.

"... Hello?"

"(F/N)! It's me!" The voice piped. "Gah, thank god you picked up!"

Your heart soared as you sprung up.

"Mathias?! Is that you?"

"Who else could it be, kæreste? Of course, it's me! I just wanted to let you know I'm okay! A little lost, but okay!" He spoke breathlessly. Now, the Danish pet name and unnecessary amount of shouting? You couldn't mistake it for anyone else.

Immediately, a huge wave of relief washed over you. But it was short-lived.

The fear burned away into a livid kind of fury.

"What the fuck, Mat? I was worried to death!" You screamed. You could practically imagine him holding the phone away while cringing at the volume. But it was merely a taste of his own medicine.

He laughed. "Sorry, sorry. It's a long story, but I promise to tell you everything."

"Sorry? I thought you died!" A few knocks sounded on your door. Sliding yourself off the bed, you unlocked it without a second thought. In walked a disgruntled Allen with his face scrunched up.

He was never a morning person, but today was a special occasion.

"I'm really sorry! I didn't mean to worry you, I swear!"

You scowled, putting him on speaker. "Then you better start talking."

A weight settled on your head—your companion decided it to be a perfect resting place for the meantime while he listened in. He then wrapped himself around you. As tired as he was, he still managed a wide, floaty smile. So he was right, wasn't he? Rather than crying over the dumb Dane, you were about to give him the lecturing of a lifetime.

So rather than telling Allen off, you let him do as he pleased. You even held onto his arm that found its place on your waist.

"Uhh, so... I'm kinda stranded."

You expected him to say, on a random island on the Spanish archipelago. Maybe he had gone out for a swim to sulk by his lonesome after you forgave Allen. It was understandable, considering he was genuinely convinced he was trying something. And because he broke safety protocols, he managed to get swept away without anyone realizing it. How he didn't drown was beyond you.

Little did you know, he took swept up to a whole other level.

"Well, spit it out! The faster you tell us where you are, the easier it'll be for you, me, and the coast guard."

Mathias 'uhhed' again.

"... Erm... I think I'm in New York?"

New York.

The Big Apple.

It was where Allen was supposed to be—his home. How did they end up switching places?

If you could, you would have gone on and on about how impossible he was. Even Allen was shocked at how red you were as you shrieked into the speaker. Unfortunately, the displaced man was borrowing a phone from a random passerby on the street, so he had to hang up. Before he did, you relayed to him that you were breaking up with him twice out of spite. It didn't really make sense, but it incited a huge reaction from Mathias nonetheless.

Wha~at! But you already broke up with me! You can't break up with me again! He'd pleaded. But he was wrong. Anything he humored you on, you could use against him. And that included made-up dating culture. He deserved that, at least.

It wasn't just the random location he wound up in that troubled you, even if he was across the North Atlantic Ocean. It was how he ended up there in the first place. Apparently, he decided to do some vigilante work and sneak onto the ferry that stole the turtle eggs. But he wasn't Batman.

He was Mathias.

So he was stranded in a foreign country with no money. And like Allen said, it was strangely hard to get rid of him. Before the call ended, you told him to go to the Spanish consulate for help. He didn't even realize he could do that. So Allen was right. How he wasn't dead was beyond you! Fucking around with animal smugglers, then actually considering sleeping outside on the streets of New York?

He'd be killed faster than he could say Ferrari.

The next day around noon, Mathias glided in on a yacht accompanied by Antonio. Inhaling the fresh salt of the Mediterranean waters, he giddily stepped down onto the pier. How he missed this smell. Before he could get far, the rapid thudding of your footsteps came charging at him at unprecedented speed.

"Mat!"

There were bags under his eyes, but the sight of you running at him was the greatest injection of energy he could ever ask for. "(F/N)!" Outstretching his arms just in time to catch you, he stumbled back from the sheer force of the collision. "Hey! Did you miss me?"

"Fuck you...! I always thought you were stupid, but not that stupid!" You exasperated in the hug. Mathias responded by holding you tighter and nuzzling into your neck. He could listen to you scold him forever, but the opportunity to breathe you in was rarer than a blue moon. "What did you think you could accomplish, huh? You’re not special! We were gonna call the cops, you idiot! You weren’t supposed to trespass and try and save the day!"

He sighed contentedly. "Mm, I’m sorry. I only ever meant to go in for a quick look. But I had to hide when people came. So I hid for like..." His voice was low with huskiness, a sure fire sign he was fatigued. "Half a day. In an empty crate. I stole one of the labels and shipped myself out so they wouldn’t find me."

Pulling away with a huff, you reached up to cup his cheeks. There was untold fondness in how you held him, even if your words didn’t reflect it. "Just shut up and take nap. I’ve had enough of your idiocy." You flickered your sad eyes over his roughed up features. There were more bruises than you could bear, and it broke your heart to see them.

Mathias picked up rather quickly for once, so he gave both your hands a reassuring squeeze. Then, he gleamed. "Don’t worry! I heal super fast! And even faster if you kiss it better," The blonde winked.

If it weren’t for the bruises, you would have pushed his face away. "I would have given you a punch, but it looks like you were punished enough."

He began to walk with you back to your house.

"Oh? So are you saying you’re not mad at me anymore?" He chimed hopefully.

You shot him a glare. "Far from it. I was gonna have your ass on the couch, but I’ll be nice since you spent a night in a box." Mathias’s smile widened, but you were pleased to say he was jumping the gun. "You can sleep in my bed. But I won’t be using it."

He pouted.

"You’d rather sleep on the couch than with me?"

"No, I’d rather sleep in a different room than you." Grinning at that, you ascended the small flight of stairs to your front porch. Allen just walked outside to greet you both. Speak of the devil. "I’ll be crashing this guy’s room."

"Wait, you are?" The said guy blinked.

Mathias’s jaw dropped. You’ve never seen him this horrified in his life. "What? No way! You—you can’t!"

You hummed delightfully. "My house, my rules. Don’t like them, you’re free to leave. You have a home to go back to, you know?"

"I think I’ll stay." His cheeks blew up in discontent.

Allen shared your mischievous grin. "Heh. It must suck being a loser all the time. But I can’t really say anything when I can’t relate." He shrugged.

"Hey! I’m not!"

[mewtonian-physics]

now that im back home SIT DOWN AND BUCKLE UP BC ITS TIME FOR BOO-WOMP'S MADELEINE RECIPE

it's actually not mine i lied. it's a thomas keller one. but moving on

You will need:

All purpose flour - 68 grams | 1/4 cup + 3 and a half tablespoons

Baking powder (POWDER NOT SODA) - 2.2 grams | 1/2 teaspoon*

Salt - 0.6 grams | 1/4 teaspoon

Eggs - 83 grams | 1/4 cup + 1 tablespoon (it's about 2-3 large eggs, room temperature and beat them)

Granulated sugar - 55 grams | 1/4 cup + 1 and 1/4 teaspoons

Unsalted butter - 66 grams | 2/3 ounces (room temperature, if you have salted butter at home you can use it, just cut down on the salt from earlier or omit completely)

Dark brown sugar - 9 grams | 2 teaspoons

Honey = 9 grams | 1/4 teaspoon

Optional ingredients, but really nice to have so I recommend you use them!

A teaspoon of vanilla extract/paste (I use paste)

1-2 drops of lemon oil OR 1 teaspoon or orange blossom water OR about half a lemon's worth of lemon zest (which is what I prefer)

This is a Thomas Keller recipe so that's why the ingredients are so specific lol. I recommend weighing the ingredients, but for the ones that are weirdly specific like baking powder and salt, just use the teaspoon measurement. And another note about baking powder, last time I made this recipe it had a bit too much baking powder and it left a weird mouth feel, so I would recommend adding a bit less. I'm not confident with how much less, but I'm trying this recipe again next weekend so I'll let you know how adding less baking powder goes.

Method timeeee

Whisk flour, baking powder and salt in a bowl and set aside. I like to sift my flour, but you don't have to.

Combine the eggs and sugar in the bowl of a stand mixer. Use a whisk attachment and mix on medium-high speed for about a minute. Then, set up a bain marie (I do this by putting a very small layer of water in a pot and resting the bowl on top of it. Keep on low heat on the stove (just make sure it's not boiling too aggressively). The bowl shouldn't be touching the water) and dissolve the sugar. You should be alright heat wise, but don't scramble your eggs T_T

After the sugar has dissolved, put the bowl back on the stand and mix on high speed for around 4 minutes, until the batter doubles in volume.

While your stand mixer is going, melt the butter, brown sugar and honey in a small saucepan over medium heat for about a minute. Remove from the heat and set it aside.

Remove the bowl from the stand and fold in half of the dry ingredients with a rubber spatula. Fold in the remaining dry ingredients until just combined. You said you like baking, so I'm assuming you know how to fold dry ingredients into a meringue so you don't deflate the air we just spend 4 minutes putting in!

Pour the warm butter mixture over the batter and add in any of the optional ingredients if you're using them (don't be a fool like me and forget to add your lemon zest in until it's already in the fridge). Then mix until smooth. Put the batter in a covered container and refrigerator overnight or for at least three hours.

When the batter is ready to be taken out of the fridge, prepare your madeleine pan. You! can't! make! madeleines! without! this! pan!! It's crucial to getting that traditional shell shape. The last time I did this I just spread a good amount of melted butter with a paper towel on it and that worked, but I've heard of people brushing the pan with melted butter, then putting the pan in the fridge to harden the butter and THEN dusting with flour. I didn't want to do this because I'm not really a fan of the flour on the outside. Plus, the melted butter by itself worked just fine.

Preheat your oven to 350 F/180˚C and spoon the batter into the moulds. You want to fill it aboutttt 3/4 full. You just don't want to overfill them. Then tap the bottom of the pan against the table to smooth it out. Bake it for about 7-8 minutes in a convection oven or 8-9 minutes in a standard oven. You want the tops lightly browned, and a skewer to come out clean with you insert it into the centre. Pretty basic baking knowledge, you should be fine :)

Unmould the little guys immediately and cool them on a rack and enjoy them fresh!! They're EXPONENTIALLY better fresh. If eating them when they're fresh means eating an entire batch of them by yourself THEN SO BE IT.

Extra tip: If you want to add chocolate, I wouldn't recommend adding chips as I found they were a bit too big and it just. It wasn't great imo. If you're going to add chocolate, I would recommend melting some and just dipping one half into the chocolate and letting it set. You could also finely chop some chocolate, I reckon that would work too. Use dark!!! Milk is too sweet I think. And I'm not even going to mention using white chocolate for obvious reasons. Dark chocolate is just superior in all baking.

If you need any help with any of the steps ask!! I shall provide assistance :)

I don't know what stage of friendship "give them an extremely detailed madeleine recipe" is. I haven't even given my irl friends this recipe (although they haven't asked i suppose).

hell yes i will read this through in depth tomorrow after i sleep. ty ty ty :D

[sxfterhearts]

42. [7:35 pm]

➳ pairing: youngjae x reader ft. amateur chef!jaebeom

➳ genre/warnings: fluff, just fluff, mildly suggestive towards the end (I haven’t written in ages so I guess that’s also a warning??)

➳ word count: 1,190 words

➳ summary: “Is this okay?”

➳ author's note: see below!!

//

“Speak up, hyung!” Youngjae breathed heavily into the microphone of his earphones. “I can’t hear anything you’re saying!”

“Young– Give me a sec,” He heard Jaebeom draw a deep breath before bellowing out an ear-piercing “Keep it down, Bam, or I’ll whoop your ass!”

Youngjae flinched, his sweaty palm nearly losing its grip on the rubber spatula.

It was an early Friday night in. He had purposely rushed back to your shared apartment the moment the clock hands struck five. Not that this wasn’t a regular occurrence, but he wanted to be extra early tonight in order to execute his plan. Youngjae thought of the perfect way to spend your first Friday after starting a new job at a well-known company in the city. Your boyfriend, being the attentive and caring person he was, intended to treat you to a bubble bath while he prepared a wholesome three course meal for you. Or at least, he was trying to.

“Sorry, Bambam’s just… being Bambam. You know how it is. Now, where was I?” Jaebeom paused, musing over his thoughts like an old man suffering from short-term memory loss.

Youngjae grit his teeth in frustration and stress as he watched the concoction of dark chocolate chips and butter melt before his very eyes. Who would’ve thought baking brownies could’ve been this stressful? “The chocolate. I melted the chocolate chips with the butter over the stove. What’s next?”

“I’m pretty sure you have to crack the eggs into the bowl. Oh wait, no, no. You have to add the vanilla extract first. Just a tiny bit, though. We don’t want it to overpower the chocolatey taste.”

“How much? Two tablespoons?”

“Are you crazy? This is a chocolate brownie, not a vanilla cupcake. A teaspoon should be fine, I think. Or was it a quarter? Shit…”

The man closed his eyes to contain his anger and heaved a large sigh. “If you just wrote down the recipe we wouldn’t be in this position, hyung…”

The elder completely dismissed his comment. “Try a teaspoon. I’m like, ninety-nine percent sure I’m right.”

Youngjae had no other choice but to oblige. After all, everyone knew, including you and the boys, that he could not bake to save his life.

And yet, here he was, trying his hands at baking your favourite dessert – brownies. He even bought the premium vanilla ice cream that you liked to quenelle on top of it later (thankfully it was on sale). Youngjae really wanted to pamper you tonight.

“It’s not that difficult, right, Youngjae? This recipe is foolproof. My cousin tried it last month and he’s only twelve.”

Youngjae wasn’t too sure about that. Sceptical, he cracked three room-temperature eggs into the gooey, fragrant chocolate mixture. “Won’t the eggs cook in the chocolate ‘cos it’s boiling hot?”

Silence.

“Hyung?”

“Listen, Youngjae, I’m not a baking god. I don’t know the answer to every single question you have. Just do as I say and pray really hard that your brownies will turn out well.” Jaebeom snapped. “Have you mixed the eggs? You have to make sure the mixture is incorporated well and as shiny as Jackson’s forehead on a hot day.”

A commotion broke out on the other end of the line. Youngjae assumed it was due to Jaebeom’s offhanded comment about the state of Jackson’s skin.

“The last thing you have to do is just mix in the flour and cocoa powder, then you can pour it into the baking pan. It has to be a square one, nine by nine inches and lined with baking paper. Oh, and you need to grease the bottom of the pan first.”

Youngjae’s mouth hung open in disbelief. “You could’ve told me this earlier! I don’t– What is nine by nine inches? Why are you even using inches, we’re in Korea!” He huffed exasperatedly.

“Twenty-three centimetres, you doofus. Find one, hurry! Otherwise the mixture will harden.”

After rummaging through your stash of baking supplies for a good five minutes, he finally found the all-important baking pan. With Jaebeom’s uniquely reassuring words, Youngjae eventually managed to pour the batter in and placed the pan into the oven with trembling hands. The boy was nervous – he just wanted everything to be perfect tonight.

Somewhere between the fifteen-minute mark and an endless string of ridiculously cute puppy videos, the door’s keypad beeped. Standing up straight, Youngjae pulled off his chocolate-stained apron and jogged towards the door in anticipation.

“Youngjae, guess what! Oh,” You paused mid-sentence, your head poking curiously into the apartment as the brownie’s fragrant aroma tickled your senses. “What smells so good? Did you bake?”

“Hey baby!” Youngjae greeted like his usual bright self, your previous bursts of stress long forgotten. He reached for your handbag and laptop bag, gently ushering you into the comforts of your home. “I did. You’re in for a relaxing night, my darling. I’ve already ran you a bath, and you can use one of your sparkly pink bath bombs.” You couldn’t take off your shoes fast enough the moment you heard the word ‘relax’.

Your mouth fell slightly agape as you held Youngjae’s buttery hands in yours, eyes filled to the brim with fascination and gratitude. “You did?”

“Yes, baby. Go! Take off your clothes and get soaking. Dinner will be ready in another half an hour.” Youngjae guided you towards the ensuite, where he ran the waters and tested the temperature just moments earlier.

You gladly welcomed his suggestion. After all, the best way to unwind after a long day of work was to soak in glittery rose-scented water and allow the knots upon knots of worries to melt away.

Your mind solely focussed on the motions of shucking off your pencil skirt and unbuttoning your blouse once you released the bath bomb. The sweet aroma overtook your senses and overpowered your stress.

A sigh involuntarily left your lips as you sank into the warm, perfumed water. Picking up the book Youngjae thoughtfully left on the edge of the bathtub, you repositioned yourself into a comfortable position. The distant humming coming from Youngjae in the kitchen, the gentle sloshing of water as you flipped the pages and the wonderful feeling of soaking your sore muscles… Nothing could get better than this.

Youngjae appeared twenty pages later to feed you a slice of his freshly baked brownies. Crouching down by your side, he inspected your facial features for any reaction with complete earnest.

“I hope that it’s okay. Is this okay?” He breathed.

“It’s more than okay, it’s everything that I need…” You paused, tongue running repeatedly over the edges of your lips in search of brownie remnants. “What did you put in these brownies, babe?”

“I… Is it… Bad? Does it taste funny? I–”

“No, not at all!” You giggled. “It’s so, so, so good! I could eat this for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Speaking of dinner…”

“The entrée is still cooking on the stove.” Youngjae admitted sheepishly.

“Hmm… That’s a shame. I’m hungry for a different type of dinner.”

“Wh… What do you mean?”

“I meant, I’d love to have you for dinner. Come, join me.”

//

➳ author's note: woah ok!! I started this towards the end of my last internship and finally mustered up the courage, strength, mental capacity etc etc to finish it off. I’m sorry if its lacklustre (which im sure it is) but just really really wanted to post this!!! (im busting with excitement omgomg) I’ve been busy with internships and having existential crises and also (ngl) procrastinated with my writing and this blog which is why I’ve been sosososoo absent. I don’t want to make empty promises but yeah, I hope to get back into tumblr again! Honestly was in such a good headspace when I was active on here, I miss it sm, I miss interacting with you guys omg okay I will stop rambling. Good night I love you ALL!!!