#it really cannot be pleasent

[odietamox]

I'm a horrible person but I don't look like I'm a horrible person which is even worse. if you meet me for the first time (and I don't look deer-in-headlight terrified) my default mode is like smiley and kind and softspoken and im really not

[thepaleys]

Grand Duchess Marie Alexandrovna on meeting the Hohenfelsens

(safe to say she was not impressed 🤣)

Paris, 16 June 1908

The young Swedish couple" has arrived in our hotel. Little Marie is a very sedate and calm little person, but she poured her heart out to Baby: she feels it terribly meeting here her step-mother and suffers greatly under it. As to poor little Dmitry, he is in perfect despair. He hates the whole thing and loathed the idea of seeing his new Geschwister [siblings]. He comes to me to talk about it.

Of course Uncle Paul and wife manquent de tact [are tactless] in every way: for instance, last Tuesday he arranged a big luncheon with quantities of his French acquaintances and asked us too. It was the first time poor Dmitry went to his house here and Uncle Paul presented him to all the guests as "mon fils aine" [my eldest son]. The boy simply se tordait de désespoir [curled up in despair], we observed it all and in the middle of this unknown company appeared these second children and all the affected French people went into loud ectasies about them [at this time, Vladimir was 11, Irina 4 and Natalie 2], whilst poor Dmitry was pale with concentrated rage and moral suffering.

Marie told Baby that she never would have come here, had she known, how it would be. And people are wonderfully taktlos. They all praise her to the skies when they talk to me, cette charmante Comtesse Hohenfelsen, "elle est adorable, cette femme". Vous trouvez [that charming Countess Hohenfelsen. She's adorable, don't you think?]. I answer, oh! Bien pour moi, c'est très pénible [for me it's all very painful] and I tell them a few truths. Then they at once turn the conversation, as French people hate when they are found at fault et ne désirent pas du tout en savoir d'avantage. [and don't want to be wrong in any way].

As to Uncle Paul, I cannot support at all him here; his whole attitude and tone I find detestable, I don't show it, à quoi bon and I am simply polite with his wife, like with any lady in society I don't care for. I simply writhe when I see in his house portraits of my mother, what a desecration! And he pointed them out to me! I thought one moment I would like to insult him before all his idiotic French guests.

"Dear Mama" - Diana Mandache

This is what I love about digging into original sources. When we read Grand Duchess Maria Pavlovna's memoires, the idea we get is that she always had a pleasent relationship with her stepmother, but here (at least according to Maria Alexandrovna, who clearly still held a deep resentment towards her brother and his second wife) it seems things were not so smooth.

It's also interesting (and sad) to notice how she doesn't really consider Grand Duke Paul's children from his second marriage worthy of any note and is even annoyed that the French fawn over them and that Grand Duke Paul introduces Dmitri as his "eldest son", which seems to imply she doesn't consider Vladimir to be his son at all.

It kind of shows what the rest of the family thought about Grand Duke Paul's second family: so irrelevant that it was as if they didn't exist.

[gabessquishytum]

Hi! Looong time lurker, first time asker <3! Want to tell you that I love your blog and how awesome concepts are born here, so I thought that I might try and share my own idea with you

Omegaverse Dreamling!

Hob is an alpha who has a successful career in academic and of course owns New Inn pub so he cannot complain, really. He feels a little bit lonely, but he doesn't specifically look for a mate. All his relationships kinda ended, it wasn't it. Hob have been going into his ruts alone for some time but he is fed up with it already. So he decides to go to a brothel and hire some omega prostitute to spend his rut with. He chooses kinda luxury Burgess' brothel.

Enter Omega!Dream. He hates his job and especially dealing with alphas' ruts so it's obvious that this bastard Burgess chose him to "assist" this new and green alpha in his first rut in a brothel. Dream is famous among the clients for his ethereal beauty but also for his snarky comments. That is why most alphas enjoy "taming" him. Dream supposes this one is not gonna be different. He couldn't be more wrong! Burgess warns him that he can't afford to lose this client, he seems rich and gullible, so Dream must behave because otherwise he is going to regret this! Dream doesn't need to be told twice, he knows very well that Burgess has a heavy hand.

When Hob enters the brothel he feels the first symptoms of a rut but when he is introduced to Dream he might as well go into full rut right now and then. What a beauty! Slender, dark-haired, with unblemished and pale skin and the most blue eyes Hob ever seen. Dream is used to being ogled but no one ever looked at him as if he hung the stars himself. He must admit the this Robert "call me Hob, please, nobody calls me Robert" isn't ugly. Quite otherwise if Dream may say so himself. And he smells so nice, even so close to his rut. He hopes that he isn't a demon in bed because he really isn't into rough sex tonight.

They go into the room, Hob is obviously the perfect gentleman and isn't treating Dream as a common whore so he is already alerted. Behind a closed doors Hob is still very polite and pleasent. He asks Dream if it is okay, if he really wants to do this, did he eat anything? maybe he would like to drink something or to talk? Dream is quite overwhelmed, nobody treated him like this ever.But he says he is okay, Hob goes to take a shower and they go into it. And...

Dream has never had since he had started working as a prostitute such pleasurable and overall good sex. Hob is gentle and caring and is treating Dream as if he was his longtime partner. Despite his rut Hob is controlling himself and is always careful to not hurt Dream. Dream might have orgasmed a few times... Fine, he orgasmed a lot, ok? But it isn't his fault Hob is so nice and skilled and has a such wonderful cock! While Hob knot goes down they cuddle and talk. Well, it is Hob mostly talking, because Dream is always withdrawn with his past, but for the first time that doesn't bothers Dream at all. Hob has such a nice voice, he could be listening to him for hours! Well, Dream is very fucked, literally and figuratively. People always told him that he falls fast and deep and this might have happened here. When Hob falls asleep he might even cry a little over himself, because there is no way that Hob would want to ever be with such an omega whore who smells of other alphas. Dream is gonna stay in that brothel as long as he is pretty and then... He fears to think, but it isn't a bright future.

Meanwhile Hob is freaking out because of course he fell head over heels in love with this gorgeous omega! Dream is perfect, in looks and in character and Hob will fight everyone who thinks otherwise.

Hob's rut ended and he went home heartbroken but he gave Dream goodbye kiss on cheek and asked if he would him to come here for his next rut. Dream of course said yes, not because Burgess was behind his back and he expected Dream to agree but because he came up with a plan! He is going to baby-trap Hob! He is now knowing when Hob's rut is going to come and he can stop taking his suppressants. It's a perfect plan!

So few months go by and when Dream sees Hob enter the brothel he immediately goes into heat. Fortunately, nobody notices and they share again a few wonderful days with Hob and surprise, Dream fallen even harder. When Hob again leaves him he only hopes that he knocked him up good. Of course it happens. But what Dream didn't expect is that he was gonna start showing so early. He hoped that he could keep it a secret till Hob will again visit him. Burgess is furious at first but then he starts selling Dream to the clients so they could imagine they knocked him up. Dream obviously said that he has no idea who knocked him up so he gained even worse reputation.

Time passes and Hob again goes into rut and to see Dream. Once inside he learns from Burgess that Dream is pregnant and if he still wants him. Hob cannot imagine his rut without Dream now, but he wanted to refuse, because he didn't want him to tire to much. But something irked him in a wrong way in this Burgess fella, maybe because he was talking shit about his Dream ( jesus, Gadling, pull yourself together) so he agreed to take Dream to the room. He wasn't planning anything sexual, he simply wanted to talk to Dream.

When they get into the room Hob starts telling Dream that he is happy for him and that he just wanted to spend some tome with him and they don't need to do anything sexual if Dream doesn't want to. And this is too much for hormone-ridden Dream. He burst into tears and starts wailing, because alpha of his pup is here and those few months were terrible, he was so sick all the time and he feels sore all over and lonely and overall terrible. But first and foremost he isn't whore! It's Hob's pup and he needs to believe him, he is sorry that he tried to baby-trap him but he loves him and Hob must now hate him, because he is a whore and he woulnd't want to be with someone so terrible like Dream!

Hob is quite light-headed after receiving such info-dumb but the most important news is still banging around in his head: he is a father! Of Dream's pup! Of course he believes Dream, he wouldn't lie to him, not while crying his eyes out, he knows that Dream is to prideful for that. So he kisses Dream partially to shut him up and partially because he loves him and he is so happy.

Dream can't believe what is happening but he isn't gonna complain! When they stop kissing Hob explains to Dream how happy he is and how much he loves him and please please please be his mate. Dream is in deep shock, but agrees, of course he agrees! So Hob takes Dream hand and commanders that they leave in this second. While leaving for good Hob punches Burgess in the face for trying to stop them.

Some time later Dream receives his so anticipated bitemark on the neck and the both of them couldn't be more happy!

Well, of course untill they go for Dream's check-up and learn he is pregnant with twins. Hob and Dream are both over the moon.

Ooops, it came out very long so so sorry for that and for any mistakes! Cheers

– AAA

Hello new friend!!! Thank you for sending this, it's so good and I love that it's a nice long one. Gosh, I feel for Dream so much!!!! The part about Burgess hiring him out to even more alphas while he's pregnant so they can fantasise about being the one who knocked him up gave me SO many ideas. Maybe one of the other alphas goes so far as to claim that the pup is actually theirs (either because they want Dream or because they just want to torture him) and Dream has to try and get out of that situation and explain how he knows that that isn't the right alpha, yes he's sure, he's not sure how he's sure he just is!! Anyhow, thank goodness Hob shows up when he does and rescues Dream from that terrible situation.

When Hob takes Dream home he puts him straight on bed-rest (after a nice long bath of course) and makes Dream promise to rest and recover. Hob will do EVERYTHING for him. Cooking, cleaning, bathing, he'll take care of his omega as much as possible. Its important for the twins but it's mostly important for Dream - he's been worked too hard and he still has so much to go through with pregnancy, labour, nursing. Hob wants to pamper him until he's at the peak of health. Dream has never been treated like this before. He keeps trying to sneak out of bed to help, and then Hob has to carry him back and cuddle him until he dozes off. Eventually Dream begins to get used to being spoiled. And resting is nice when his belly gets so big.

All in all Dream becomes a very happy omega, and his and Hob’s pups are the most loved and cherished in the whole world. Dream is so glad that he baby-trapper his alpha. And Hob is, too!

[zhongrin]

Hello i am here to ramble about your dragon husband

I find it really fascinating that you can see while watching his fighting style that he fought for a really long time? He is stable, efficent and is sure to hit. Aaaand you can say that is foundation is based on the geo he symbolises (another hit for the geo sovereign *cough*) he is sure in his movements. And the kick. Ehehee

And you can kinda see that Xiao tried to emulate him to some extent but let his own element, experience and stature into the style? Where Li is calculating, Xiao is more like a feral cat. Tempered by age and free as the wind. Calmness and ferocity cannot exist seperate and both embody them at the appropiate times?? Neat detail.

Oh and I hope u had pleasent dreams of all your hubbies making a big cuddle pie together with u <3

i'm not knowledgeable enough in martial arts so i don't feel qualified to comment, all i know is that he just looks so effortlessly beautiful and elegant while fighting… men who have the coordination to kick their weapons are sooo ✨✨✨ (zhongli and al haitham my beloveds)

speaking of xiao... i just used him night for co-op ing some of the natlan local legends… and i have to say, i missed playing him. it was a lot of fun. very intense and fast-paced.

[frost-queen]

hi! i'm slightly new here and i want to ask how you set up your account to take in requests and make all these masterpieces?

(i've been following you for a while and i really love all your works, especially your bridgerton reader ones)

Oh wow an honour to have this question. First of all hi 👋 welcome to my humble bumble blog. There is lots to explore with 3 masterlists where i'm sure you can find the fandoms to your liking. (Link in my bio).

Oh wow uhm let me think... I still remember the moment I decided to put up this blog. It was when the star wars movie the force awakens came out. I had just seen it in the movie theatre. Became obessed with Kylo Ren & decided to give it a shot. (I had been writing some minor things mostly for myself before, which if anyone found those papers in my folder, i would die with embarrassment 😂🤭)

I literally wrote my first fic for Kylo Ren with no expectations. If I had even 1 like i was already happy. Then I wrote a part 2. Rolled into some new fandoms like Awae I think. Mostly I just wrote my own idea's that had popped up in my head. Wrote them down & once again uploaded them with no expectations but sharing my idea. I had always allowed my inbox to be open for everyone, not expecting much things from it. Then one day the first ask came in. Idk which fandom it was for anymore, but I felt euphoria that someone wanted me to put their idea's on paper. I loved to make that person happy & have their dream idea be marked with ink (digital words 😉) on paper. I do have to admit that when I look back at those first fic's my writing has taken a huge turn. I mean I have been constantly changing, trying out what I could do better or how it would read more pleasently. I guess the more requests came in with the wider I expended my writing fandoms. I didn't think it would boom this much, but I am loving it ever since. I love that I can share my passion & make others happy by printing their idea's out on papers.

I inhale books 😂 so I get much intell and inspo for that. Also my mind is like an imaginary factory all by itself. There does not go a day by where I don't think about fanfiction idea's. Music is a great deal for me. I cannot write without music. Not only the lyrics but the vibe of the song helps a lot with writing scene's. For me it feels so real then. I even have some Spotify playlists for certain vibes (like a whole Bridgerton inspired playlist 😉).

I feel like I have been taking a side rail on this question hahah I can go on for forever but I feel like I perhaps should tone my enthusiasm down 😂. To conclude, all of this didn't start in a few days. It took months for me to even receive maybe one, two or three asks. I wouldn't consider myself a masterpiece writer, but I am too humble for that 🤭 and thank your compliment ❤️. I am always open for exchanging my "wisedom" to others (not that I consider myself an expert, far from).

Thank you for loving my Bridgerton fics 😘 if you ever need anything, you only need to ask 🩷 I hope in this huge mess of words, you find an answer to your question 🤭

[nicocoisanerd]

I finally rolled the credits on the Silent Hill 2 Remake a few days ago, and I'm pleasently surprised at how much I enjoyed it. Especially since Bloober's has a very spottty track record, with The Medium being downright ignorant of abuse and mental issues, so I cannot express in words how happy I am, that they didn't mess these themes up in this remake. If the original was an (unreasonable) 10/10 for me, then this hovers around 8.5/9-10. Not all of the additions work quite as well, but I'm more impressed by it than anything. They added a few things to the story, which I think mostly worked pretty well! Especially the acting, which I thought really added a lot of nuance to the characters. I recommend playing this on the hardest combat difficulty, as it really enriched my experience, even if the boss fights can be a bit frustrating. Also, do play this with headphones!... I say, as someone who noped out of that in the latter half, because I was very creeped out.

As a mega fan of the original, I'm just happy to say I have two really good versions of the same story.

Next up for me should be The Lake House DLC for Alan Wake 2 and Metaphor: ReFantazio

[destinyc1020]

Honestly sad af the studios dnt wanna budge, they aint goin 2 do anything till they start losong millions. And if they decide to continue without promo, which I think they will, they losing momey cuz the younger cast promo culd bring in more viewers (n more money for studios).

Yes cast interviews wuldv been nice, bt i hope theyll b able to tell their onset stories one day 😭 curious to see if they did any fun bonding activities

With Austin n Z, yea i did think cuz Hollywood is so...intertwined 😅 Kaia seems to like/b a fan of Z (based on IG likes n comments) bt Z dnt really interact with K on IG lik, bt obviously IG aint the only form of communication n their pleasent with each other IRL 😀

Honestly sad af the studios dnt wanna budge, they aint goin 2 do anything till they start losong millions.

Exactly 💯

That's why I'm thinking the GP might have to get involved... cuz if ppl decide to boycott and NOT watch any films in theaters until these execs start negotiating, these greedy execs will actually be hit in their pockets.

Otherwise, these execs are just gonna play the "waiting game" indefinitely, which imo is so sad, since they know that Actors and writers cannot afford to go on strike indefinitely. 😩

I hope some of these strikers have taken up some PT jobs outside of the ET industry (I don't care if it's flipping burgers at McDonald's or working in retail) so that they won't be pushed into just accepting anything. 😭

And if they decide to continue without promo, which I think they will, they losing momey cuz the younger cast promo culd bring in more viewers (n more money for studios).

Unfortunately, I don't think the amount of money they would lose from non-promotion would make that much of a difference.

I feel like fans were going to see the movie anyway regardless, and if it's actually really GOOD, then word of mouth will spread to more ppl. It's the ppl who were on the fence imo who will probably be affected most by the lack of promotion. 🥴

Yes cast interviews wuldv been nice, bt i hope theyll b able to tell their onset stories one day 😭 curious to see if they did any fun bonding activities

I hope so too... 🙏🏾 😔

With Austin n Z, yea i did think cuz Hollywood is so...intertwined 😅 Kaia seems to like/b a fan of Z (based on IG likes n comments) bt Z dnt really interact with K on IG lik, bt obviously IG aint the only form of communication n their pleasent with each other IRL 😀

Lol I think it's kinda hard to have beef with Zendaya honestly. 😅 Plus, Kaia has always seemed to be on Z's side even after the JE breakup. I've never really sensed any bad blood at all btwn them. 🤷🏾‍♀️ Plus, they're both so nice that I don't think they would really have anything against each other. 🙂

[hocuspocusbullshit]

he throws the door to the roof open, stepping into cool evening air. the door slams shut behind him with a subtle click. he goes to the edge without thinking about it, still fuming.

/throw yourself off/ a voice in the back of his head tells him. /no one will care/.

no. for once, that is not what he came up here for.

yes, johns song is stupid. he has every right to be angry, really. this whole album is fucking stupid. but its only one, brian tells himself as he lowers himself to the ground. in a few months, they will be gone from this place, the album will be out, they will plan a tour, and he will have something to do.

atleast the view is nice. it might be the only pleasent thing about this godforsaken studio.

silver clouds roll overtop the forest, bringing a soon promise of rain. in the distance is the lake, dark and shimmering. a gentle wind teases his curls.

it really is beautiful here.

he moves forward until his legs hang over the edge. he kicks them freely. a sense of freedom comes over him, one that he has rarely felt since he was 27. if someone comes up here and sees him like this, they will be furious. for now though, it is worth the risk.

he stays there until the first drops begin to fall. cold, but not stinging. living in london his whole life has made rain a welcome friend. just, not here. his hand closes on the handle and-

its locked.

brian frowns.

pushing down and rattling the handle does nothing. theres the telltale sound of rattling on the other side but the door does not budge.

"seriously?" he mutters, then kicks for good measure.

panic unfurls and grips his heart, spreading like ice.

he does not have a watch but judging by the rapidly darkening sky, he has been up here for atleast a few hours. no one has come looking for him, and it will be fully night soon. there is no shelter here. with the incoming storm, there will be no moon or stars to light the sky and pass his time with. if, they dont come for him soon.

which. they might not. today was far from the first time he has ran off in a huff.

"youve got to be fucking kidding me" one paticular drops smacks him directly in the eye and he curses again. yelling for help will not do anything either. every second reduces the chances of someone coming up here looking for him. they stopped chasing after the first half dozen times he left.

he kicks the door again, then sighs. it is going to be a long night.

-

the storm grows fast, angry grey clouds and fat drops that smack against the tarmac so hard they bounce. the wind picks up too, howling so hard it whistles in when his ear when it touches him. he lays spread eagle in the middle of the roof, far away from a chance of the winds blowing him off, and watches until he cannot see anymore. thunder booms and lightning flashes far away. they will miss the worst of it, atleast, and the studio will likely keep its power.

he has not laid in the rain like this since he was a child.

here, there is no mother scolding him for soiling his clothes or a father yelling at him for tracking mud across the floor. the fog had not found him then. but even that momentarily feels like it has been left behind with the rest of civilization, washed away by the sound and feel of rain smacking on his skin.

-

far below, freddie roger, and john go to bed. the red special sits untouched waiting in her stand. te will be back to play later, he always is, they know, when they are not there to bother him.

-

the novelty of being stuck up here fades once every part of him has been drenched in water. his clothes stick his body and his hair hangs flat and tangled and christ alive he is /cold/.

between the damp and the night and the wind, every bit of warmth has been sapped from him. even when he hauls himself up and stumbles to a stickout for a vague attempt at shelter, it cannot stop the onslaught of rain. he is only half hidden from the wind no matter which direction he faces. the metal presses against his back when he crouches and freezes him further.

brian buries his face in his knees.

--

"this fucking sucks"

he walks makes tiny motions to keep his blood circulating. rubbing his hands on his arms, staying curled does nothing to help him or his mind. he screams once from pure frustration, letting the storm carry his voice away into nothing. it does not bring the catharis he wishes for. he wants to burn energy he does not have, scream until his throat is raw and bleeding. no one will hear him anyway (he thinks that might be a metaphor for how most of his life has gone up to this point) but when he opens his mouth a sob slips out instead.

the rain hides his tears.

-

eventually, his stomach grumbles. he folds his hands overtop, flexes his feet. he had to adjust his position when his muscles began to cramp. they are still cramping, beset with chill. now, he is half laid down, leaning against the powerbox. if he stretches his toes just enough, he can brush the lip of the roof.

he is still shivering. at some point he started sneezing too.

atleast if he gets sick, he will have an excuse to hide away for a few days. he will not have to hear how useless he is.

-

this is, far and beyond, the worst night of his life. he is /miserable./ even the night he had collapsed had not been like this. hazy though the memories are, delirious with pain, he knows he had the luxury of speed, his head in freddies lap, a hospital bed, someone always holding his hand.

there is no such comfort anymore. there will not be, either. they are not that close anymore. long are the days of sitting in each others lap, tangling their feet together, even falling into the same bed at the end of a show. he cannot remember the last time any of his friends have even so much as clapped him on the shoulder.

he cannot remember /warmth./

he has never been so cold in all his life.

-

one shiver runs through him so hard he hits his head on the wall. it hurts, he knows it does, can feel it radiating throughout his skull. it is just that it is muffled. his tongue feels like cotton in his mouth. his eyes sting. his hands and feet are numb.

maybe the prospect of throwing himself off here was a good idea.

-

he wonders who will find his body in the morning.

-

the rain has stopped.

-

everything hurts.

-

it is nearly 11 in the morning when roger finally throws a (something) into the wall.

"where the bullocks is he?" he curses. "does he really think he can be lazy and wank off while the rest of us are here?"

"oh leave him, its not like we need him" john rolls his eyes. "the longer he stays out of this, the better. i feel like i can finally breathe without him hounding me"

"youre not doing anything either rog. why dont you go join him?" freddie purrs.

"because i know that i occassionally have an actual job to do!" he spits the words. "im not fucking enjoying this either but atleast im not being a bum about it!"

"oh, you can go have some actual fun" paul, snickering at freddies shoulder.

"oh for fucks sake-" roger abrubtly stands, knocking over a stand. "we are a BAND. ACT LIKE IT." he pays no attention to the mess, stomping over to john and closing an iron grip over his arm.

"what are you-"

"youre the one responsible for this. youre coming with me to drag his sorry ass here. if i have to sit here and do nothing, so does he."

"roger-"

"come." john grumbles, but follows him out the door anyway.

roger is still swearing when they get to brians door. john hands him a cigarette, and it seems to quiet him down, if only momentarily. he leans against the far wall and lights his own while roger knocks.

"brian." he bangs on the door. "wake up."

no awnser

"we need you to play something"

no awnser.

"god i hope hes fucking decent" roger mutters before turning the knob and stepping inside.

"brian harold may you lazy fuck-"

his voice dies in his throat. brians room is empty. sheets pulled back expose an empty bed, the shower is not running, there is no pair of shoes tucked besides the door.

unease settles over him.

he steps back out of brians room, closing it behind with a soft click.

"well? is he coming or not?"

"john" rogers voice comes out tinny and small. "go get freddie. hes not here"

-

there are no other residents in munich studios. only the four of them, their producers, and the staff. there are only so many places a guitarist can hide.

[fuckyatalkinbout]

The accursed wish

My wish is to die, it's not really like I'm depressed, some call me crazy, but I just can't see myself being around humans anymore. They are pattern seekers, predictable parasites that contamine everything. Of course there are nice moments with them, they know how to love, cheer eachother up, joke around, but somehow that part is missed by me. It Fades away too fast. Anyway, I've wanted to go to buy some weed, so I can sit alone and paint. I like painting, it makes me feel like I do leave people like myself something behind, even tho they can't see it, they might feel it. Maybe someone want's the same thing as me and creates art for me. That would be nice. The weed is just for relaxation. You know when your home country is collapsing and nobody dares to speak up because they might get angry eyes looking at their soul, judging and thinking bad thoughts. Then they don't talk. That's how you get the world to agree to shut up. Mutual acknowledgement of death and fear. And while that country is collapsing, I've moved to a knew one, a worse one. The people are warm, different, positive. That is a good aspect, but I do miss the never made memories I could have gathered along the downfall. The beauty of duality fascinates me. Chaos and order will always be. Although I consider chaos as beutiful, I couldn't comprehend that even if I die in chaos, everything would be fine. You can only learn that through order. If you live in order, you can't die, because you have things to do, stuff to finish. If you die in chaos, you just die. I find myself even more conflicted with these people. That's why I paint. Ordered chaos on a canvas is worth the same time as ordered chaos in human minds and they're societys. I've grown to like a painting of me, that I drew for a person. I drew it with my blood. She didn't understand what the chaos on the canvas, and the orderly put together lines of blood meant and threw it away. Again an forgetable experience, exept I gave away my blood for the hope of reciving a spot for my painting, but got rejection. That made me question if my blood does in fact hold no true meaning in order aswell, or if these pleasent people here just hold facades to live for another day in chaos. My mind went blank and I just stared into the Glass with the bloody pen. If there is no meaning in a destined or sudden death. If there is no meaning in Blood. If the human race cannot see or comprehend Art. Then why bother picking up the pen? My wish wasn't my death, it was a world without humans, the death of all. To not be hypocritical, I picked up the knife again and started with my ownd death. My wrist open, smearing on canvases and screaming in pain, I felt my death. Finally I felt what Art means. My deathwish came through, I just didn't realize that I wouldn't get the chance to live a normal life with this wish, but I guess that doesn't matter now. I wish I never wished for death. I wish now for another chance with a different canvas.

[my-name-is-jefferooni]

OH. MY. GOD.

IT’S HEREEEEEEE IT’S HERE IT IS HERE THE GODDAMN COMIC IS HEREEEEEEEEEEEEEE OMG OMG OMG IVE BEEN WAITING SO LONG OMIGOSH IT’S HERE YAYAYAYAYAYAAAAAA-

y is Amy stoopid-?

OKAY FIRST OFF! I JUST WANNA SAY THAT THIS WAS ALL SO WORTH THE WAIT!! I HAVE NOT BEEN WRONG IN MY ASSUMPTIONS BECAUSE THESE BACKGROUNDS ARE ABSOLUTELY STUNNING AND THE CHARACTER WORK IS FANTASTIC!! And just… Just the art in general??? Wow??????? I love it!!!!!!!

I also like how you handled Metal’s introduction in his first 3 panels. When he was standing all the way in the back like that, I genuinely thought he was actually the real Sonic, but nope! I was pleasently surprised to find it was Metal all along!

And Amy is such a delight! I adore seeing her portrayed as this young and dumb teenager who’s still figuring things out for herself and trying new things. She’s brutal and straightforward and quick to the chase, and it’s clear her brain is still developing, showing just how young she really is. Her attitude did catch me off-guard, but it’s definitely not unwelcome in any way! I cannot wait to see what’s in store for out favorite pink hedgehog this time!

Oh and don’t even get me started on the dynamic between Sonic and Tails, they’re so fuccin adorable!!! Interesting to see how their dynamics will play out between Metal and Amy. Also curious about the backstory of Sonic and Eggman… I am intrigued. Hook, line, and sinker.

Anywhizzle I will wait patiently for the next few pages! These ones are already outstanding!

Now if you’ll excuse me, I will be staring at these pages for the next 5 hours.

SURPISE, it's the start of issue 2, introducing Amy and Metal Sonic!

Ko-Fi - ISSUE 1 START - ALL CHAPTERS - NEXT

[missbrunettebarbie]

Hi how are you? So I just finished reading the viscount who loved yesterday and I seriously do NOT understand how could people prefer the romance in the book (which is basically copy & past of S1 ( I didn’t read the 1th book)) over the romance we got on the show. Anthony was unbearable in the book, he was like nicest frat toxic  masculinity  guy with rapy vibes and their so called romance lacked an actual romance. I do admit that the proposal & wedding was annoying but it still better than Anthony basically “forcing” himself on Kate while she just sits there too shocked to react or to actually have a day about it. Please tell me I’m not the only who felt this way

Tbf, I dislike both the book AND the show. But yes, the show handled Kate and Anthony's "romance" much better than the book.

The simple fact that they managed to make Anthony less of a pathetic frat boy -as you called him- who had the charm of a wet blanket and an intelligence lower than a tea spoon is already a miracle. I mean, don't get me wrong, I still find show!Anthony barely more charismatic than a wet blanket and he is in no way smart, but he still manages to be leagues ahead of his book counterpart. Like, book!Anthony's daddy issues and "Oh, I am gonna die young" belief were beyond ridiculous. The bee scene was unbearable to read, so I was pleasently surprised when the show turned it into something that was actually emotional.

As for Kate and Anthony's wedding night...I am going to confess, I rarely manage to pay attention to sex scenes in romance books. I try, I really do, but most of them are so, so boring. (Especially if I read it in English. I just find it everything very unsexy) But if I dislike the couple, which was the case with Kate and Anthony, I don't even try to pay attention to it, I mostly skim read till I find some plot again. And considering how Daphne and Simon's sex scenes went in the previous books, I did not trust Julia Quinn enough to subject myself to more sex scenes than absolutely necessary.

Buuut, from what I remember, Anthony was horrible to Kate the first time they slept together. I kinda zoned out from the momwnt he said "Am I the first man you ever saw naked? Good, I am gonna be the last one." Way to kill any sexyness that might have been left in that scene. I also remember Kate being the stereotypical nervous bride -that is clearly NOT aroused- and I cannot remember Anthony saying "Hey, it's ok, you are way too anxious for us to sleep together tonight." Which would have been the decent thing to do. I think I never read the actual sex scene because I felt too sorry for poor Kate. She lost her virginity in a frankly horrible way to an even more horrible guy.

Overall, the more I read from JQ, the more I realized she is NOT my cup of tea. She does have a couple romances which I liked, but overall, what this woman finds sexy is 😬😬😬 for me.

[the---hermit]

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

I've had this on my tbr ever since my Italian professor mentioned the story on my first of second year of high school. It kind of took me a while to get to it, but I finally got a copy and I read it in like two days. I am going through a dystopian phase, as I have recently read We by Zamjating and my next read is going to be 1984 by Orwell. I cannot wait to have read these major dystopian classics to compare them (I am also looking forward to find a copy of Brave New World by Huxley). Anyway I will talk about this in a different post after I have read all of them.

This copy of Fahrenheit 451 I got has an amazing introduction written by non other than Neil Gaiman (my favourite author for those who don't know), and me being me I had not realized it when I bought the book, so it was such a pleasent surprise. I have annotated this book so much it's crazy, it was so interesting to read, and I started a bit of comparaison with We and the dystopic world created by Zamjatin. For those who don't know, although I imagine very few, this short novel is set in a dystopic world where books are illegal. Firefighters are now sent to burn down houses in which someone is said to be having books. It's kind of a terrifying concept, and a few lines of the book really hit. Something that surprised me is how some messages seemed very directed to nowadays' society. For instance there's a very beautiful passage in which a character explains how small humans are compared to nature, and that it could take over in no time. It's just an exaple (and I definitely didn't give justice tocthe paragraph), but there's many more. I love how condensed the book is, it's very short, and I'm pretty sure it's one of the reasons for which it is so effective. You are thrown into a world and after 160 pages you are out of it with your mouth hanging open. I loved the writing as it was approchable and very fast, but at the same time very beautiful. As I was says there's so many interesting passages. It's one of those books that is a classic for a reason, and should be read at least once by everyone. It creates so many question, and it's incredibly thought provoking. I definitely recommend this to everyone.

[dom-bastiansmythe]

PM: Out of all the people I was expecting to see, you certainly were not on the least, but it was a pleasent surprise. At least something good came out of this debacle of a week. They are adorable. I really cannot see myself having any kids, but they are a bunch of cute. They also happen to love my dog, so that is a plus. You already have a foot out there, that is something.

PM: I do remember that. Well I consider that quite the compliment, Bas. Yeah? I love them, they're so silly. Been good. I wouldn't call myself a hot shot though. I have to put in the grunt work before I can be that.

[saintobio]

Another amazing chap. Thank you so much for working so hard even when you're sick. Legit a saint, we really don't deserve your kindness ❤️

I just have two comments

Sera being extremely rude and ungrateful is such a turn off. Like okay she might have a pleasent face to look at and amazing figure but it's all face value. I don't know if she will ever come to her senses or not, but it's just painful to see her interact with her parents, especially her mom. I am super close to my mother and so are my siblings. We cannot digest our mom's tears and pain so her insolence just triggers my hate for her. I just wanna ask, how do you feel when you write such scenes?

Gojou is really pulling a Sovieshu here. Thinking that they can solve such issues without confining in with their partners. Like yes, he ROYALLY MAJORLY screwed up... But if anything, he should've learnt the importance of communication by now (plus he is a CEO, bro business needs some kind of communication?) I did not see that divorce coming in though. Like I wanted Gojou to suffer and hurt, so technically I did get my petty revenge, but at what cost? Seeing how this has come at such an important junction for both the families, I am softening for Gojou (argh) cause we may lose him permanently and well it is a Gojouxreader fic. I literally forgot the reason why started reading this fic until this divorce (my love is reignited) :3

Once again, thanks for this chap update. You didn't have to push yourself and shouldn't as well. You manage to answer a loooot of asks, going through each of them sent to BOTH your accounts. I hope you're resting and not biting more than you can chew. Stay safe and healthy ❤️👀

aah thank u for reading !! honestly if anything, sera’s very fun to write about. her thought process is so interesting and amusing for me so i rly enjoy writing her povs bc she offers a great contrast to the mc. it’s not common to see her role as an antagonist given her life situation so i’m very proud of her character <33

[sp00kymulderr]

eupnea (Ezra x Reader)

Warnings: Just sickeningly sweet fluff, no plot. Kissing.

Pairing: Ezra x Female Reader

Word Count: 1,902

Request: once upon a time @goldafterglow​ sent me an ask that just said “Hi the only! thing! I can think about right now is nuzzling Ezra’s tummy and making him giggle because he is a sweet good boy with a soft tum and he deSeRVES IT PLS SOMEONE NUZZLE HIS TUM OR I’LL RIOT” and I took it and ran with it, in a completely different direction.

A/N: Ok so there is tummy nuzzling in this but it’s not the main feature of the fic, but I did fit it in. Hands up if you would also really like to be nuzzling Ezra’s soft little tum right now.

Like a moth to the flame, unable to resist his radiance, you were drawn to Ezra from the very beginning.

When you had met, you working mechanics for a contract while he was there to dig, you didn’t really believe in love. Certainly not love at first sight, true love, soulmates. None of those old fairy tales your mother told you growing up. You hadn’t felt it before, never needed anyone in that way.

But then there was Ezra and you felt struck by lightning.

Even when he put on a show to the others of being the intimidating vagrant fringeling only looking to make credit, you saw straight through it. He was more, had so much to him. His presence thrilled you, made your blood pump like molten liquid through your veins, you knew you would never be able to get enough.

And oh, Ezra was resplendent. When he smiled it warmed every cold part of your being, his laugh lighting up the bleak constant dark of the planet you were stationed on. Beautiful too. Like none before him, there was no hope for you. From those shining, wide eyes to his striking nose, the unusual patch of blonde at the front of his soft head of hair to the small silvered scar below one eye. You never wanted to look upon another face again.

He felt it too. Desperate with it, seeking you out at each opportunity. Spending hours in your tent just talking, him with that sticky sweet voice and words spilling from him like honey from the jar. You swapped stories of life on the fringe and futures you could barely let yourself imagine. Quickly overcome with longing - lingering gazes and grazing hands, hiding away together with your fingers interlaced and your hearts becoming ever more entangled.

And yes he admit to you he had a past, and he was certainly not faultless, but you understood that beyond anything else he was a man with true heart. Genuine and kind where it mattered despite everything, despite the pain you saw in him that he tried so hard to hide. Despite growing up in a world so unforgiving, where he had quickly learnt to be cunning and devious to survive. He hadn’t let his lot in life completely determine his humanity.

You loved him more with every new part of himself that he revealed to you.

With Ezra, it was immediately like all the little pieces of life's puzzle were put together. It all made sense. Everything. It was the most powerful thing you had ever experienced. You both knew, from the very beginning, this thing between you was life-changing. Nothing would pull you apart.

***

After that contract had ended you decided to stay together, impossible to part when you dreamt only of each other.

And now in what feels like a different lifetime, you are settled. A particularly fortuitous dig with enough successfully mined aurelac to fill several cases and only one barely escaped ambush had left you both with enough credits that you could actually find a home, a comfortable cabin tucked away in beautiful unspoilt forest, this place is for the two of you and no one else. Having somewhere the two of you could call home felt like the most beautiful luxury you could imagine.

To begin with you had been concerned that Ezra would regret his decision, you understood his need to rest a while now that he could - you were both so weary, had both been through so much in this life. But he was so accustomed to being constantly on the move, not staying in the same place for long enough to call it home. Part of you fearing he would come to resent you for tying him down to this place, this quiet life, you.

The look on his face now though tells you clearly that he is perfectly content.

You rest together on the plush, comfortable couch – your head in his lap as he absent-mindedly brushes his fingers against your jaw with a lazy smile. He glows; rested and nourished, well fed and well loved, and your heart swells with pride to know that is your doing – that you had in hand in renewing a tired spirit. A slow tune drifts through the air from the crackly old speakers on the opposite side of the room, and you close your eyes as you sing along in a happy daze.

“My beautiful little songbird” he chuckles as the music fades out leaving you singing on your own, and when you open your eyes he’s looking down at you with the kind of adoration that takes your breath away each time. He loves you so deeply, so fierce and yet gently. Even after years he holds you like you are something more brilliant than any gem he ever pulled from the ground.

“You’re the beautiful one” you murmur, reaching up to stroke a hand against his cheek, tracing gently over the small silvery scar, “I’m just here to provide some music”.

“And you certainly do that, such sweet music. But I see we’re at an impasse, birdie, because I cannot accept such a title while you’re here making all the goddesses envious”

“Hush,” you grin, “let me have this. Don’t I deserve to see my love smile so bright as I tell him he’s more brilliant than every star in the night sky?”

He laughs turning slightly bashful at your words but it’s there, the beautiful curve of his plush lips to grace you with that genuine smile. You do adore seeing him like that, to make him know how much you adore him and see him lose his words because of it. There was a time before when he didn’t take compliments so well and you had to convince him that each loving word was true, those days when he was haunted by his past ventures and the loss of his limb. And it had hurt to see him struggle like that, watch him so slowly come to terms with it.

Ezra starts to say something in return, something you’re sure will be nothing short of poetry meant to flatter you, but interrupts himself with a wide yawn, his torso stretching up with it and causing the grey fabric of his shirt to ride up slightly. The movement reveals the gentle swell of soft golden skin that you are so fond of, that you have often laid your head on as you talked for hours, and that now is another sign of the good life you’re finally living together. You move and hand to where the fabric has ridden up, just resting it there for a moment as he returns to himself to look down at you with that dopey, lazy, happiness written all over his face.

“I love you so much” you stutter, taken by the way he looks framed by the orange glow of setting sun through the window.

“Every bit of you, more than I could ever say” you sigh, moving your head to nuzzle your cheek against his stomach then turn to kiss it, a light giggle floating down to you, “I’m so grateful that my star brought me to you”.

“Your star?” Ezra asks, you hum a yes against his skin then kiss again. His hand lies at the side of your neck, pleasent stroke of his thumb against you.

“Didn’t I tell you the story? The soul star?”

“I can recall every story you’ve ever shared with me, songbird. I can conjure up where we were and exactly how you told it at any given moment. This one is new to me and I would be delighted to hear you tell it, please” he answers, excitement wavering in his tone, he always loves to listen to you.

“Ok, I’ll tell it.” you chuckle, brushing against his belly with your cheek again, feeling him relax further in to the couch as you do.

“It was one of those romantic old wives tales my mother used to share. I never believed it, couldn’t understand it until we met”, you punctuate your words with another tender press of your lips to his skin. “She told me every one of us has a star, our own incredible bright light that watches over us, up in the distance keeping an eye on us. She said our star knows what we need and when we need it, and when it comes to the right time the star will call out to us. If we answer the call and follow where it leads, it will take us to the place our soul belongs”

He hums softly, letting you continue as his hand comes to cover yours that lays on him.

“It was told often, and I always laughed it off. I didn’t feel I belonged anywhere, you know that. But then there was the job, the one on Triada Five,” Ezra squeezes your hand at this, the job you had met on “I didn’t want to take it, it was long and the ship was a rust-bucket that looked like it wouldn’t make it half way there. I was about to turn it down, figured I could make the same credits fixing ships on the Pug, but something...something stopped me. It was like a tiny voice whispering in my ear, comforting and kind, told me that if I took the job I would find everything I needed. And I didn’t even doubt it, didn’t question it at all.”

“It was your star” Ezra mutters, intrigued, absolutely taken in by your story.

You nod, skin soft against his where your head rests, before moving to sit up and placing yourself in his lap. You can feel the pooling of tears in your eyes, you had never let yourself believe it entirely but hearing him say it overwhelms you. If you hadn’t taken that job, who knows if your paths would ever have crossed. Whether it was your soul star, or fate, or pure dumb luck you don’t know but you are grateful of whatever force was in play then.

“I suppose it was my star. I think it called out, and led me to you, Ezra. And I think here-” you place a hand on his chest, over his heart, “is where I belong. With you”

You feel a tear trickle from the corner of your eye, Ezra quickly catching it and wiping it away before he pushes forwards to kiss your lips.

“I think you’re correct, birdie. And it’s dawning on me that I felt it too, long ago” he reveals, arm coming around your middle to pull you closer, “I was lead through galaxies to you. You are my reason for everything”

And then he’s kissing you again; deep and never-ending, just you and him and the peaceful chorus of rustling trees in the forest around the cabin.

You remain like that for a long while, bodies pressed together, mouths open in quiet adoration of the other. The sun leaving the sky as you find yourselves through each other again and again. When he finally pulls away, you are breathless and bursting full of pure affection.

“Come on, songbird,” Ezra says as you chase his lips for once more kiss “Let’s wander down to the lake. The stars are out and I believe we owe them our gratitude”

Permanent tag list:

@youhavereachedtheendofpie​ @princessbatears​ @catfishingmorales​ @hdlynn​ @fleetwoodmactshirt​ @chews-erotically​ @keeper0fthestars​ @marydjarin​ @readsalot73​ @a-seeker-of-imagination​ @agentpike​ @heatherbel​ @din-damn-djarin​ @seasonschange-butpeopledont​ @mstgsmy​ @sin-djarin​ @huliabitch​ @ahopelessromanticwritersworld​ @phoenixhalliwell​ @dindjar-n​ @softpedropascal​ @millllenniawrites​ @blancatobarxoxo​ @cyaredindjarin​ @goblinqueen95​ @knittingqueen13​ @teaofpeach​ @agirllovespancakes​ @insomniamamma​

Ezra tag list:

@pedropascallion​ @justanotherblonde23​

[rurifangirl]

ayo a few oc asks🤩

shoe/qiran🌸

Would they get a pet? What kind? Who brings up the idea, and who takes a little longer to convince?

kida/sum fuckin self control🌸

When would they say “I love you?” Do they say it first? Do they say it often, or is it reserved for special moments?

kayn/ruri🌸

They’re going through something incredibly difficult—perhaps they’re very sick, have lost a loved one, or have gone through a traumatic event. Do they ask for or accept support and care from their partner, or try to isolate themselves?

lyva/myst🌸

They have to apologize to their partner. Is this difficult for them? How do they approach it?

Shoe(<3)/Qiran-

Honestly, yes. Absolutely. I feel like they both would've brought up the idea but like, w different animals, so If anything It was more of a "competition" of who would get the other to buy the animal they want.

Shou wants a snake for ahem SOME reasons n Qiran wanted an Otter.

Though in the end they both don't end up buyin a pet they still brag sometimes bout theirs being better than the others animal.

Like just going "While I do think an otter would be somewhat of a pleasent accompaignon, I still think that-" "'WHA IS THE UTILITY OF A SNAKE IF WE 'READY HAVE YA???(affectionate)"

Kida/sum fucking self control-

Absolutely sum fucking self control, Kida would be probably be silent about It and would rather not give In too much. 😔

Kayn/Ruri-

Oh boy, so Imma go through first the sick scenario n then the more personal one.

Kayn's the most personal aware of both his n Ruri's limits so he can understand whenever he has to being cared of, even if because of a silly reason. Mind you he'd still try his best even in a physically sick state n would actually kinda get angy at Ruri, for overtime stuff while he's unable to help him.

He'll just be trying to stop him n that he's doin enough, but 90% of the time he won't.

Just, the image of a bitch takin care of his big bb overall, but them complainin cuz "you also need to take care of u >:[" scenario.

-------------------------------------------------------

While in Ruri's case, I've seen this happening especially when he first got released that for context since ya don't know either, Ruri was basically destroyed. Like couldn't do any basic stuff, so Kayn had to basically become his babysitter.

He tollerated it but hated being powerless or seemin weak especially in front of someone like Kayn. Kinda rebelled sometimes w bein helped, but he has a soft spot for him, so in the end it's similar to what he does w him.

Kinda wanna do this last scenario since I've got an idea for It for a long time, so it's gonna be more developed there.

-------------------------------------------------------

Now this Is separated from the rest, but longstory short they both have great difficulty w trying to help the other in these events. Aside from the Osho trauma they can both help and relate with, for the losses or for any other traumatic event they've been in, they tend to yes show the other that they're here either by physical contact (in kayns case) or being straight-foward and offering emotional support (in ruris case).

Though w Kayn it's more natural askin for help, Ruri would rather isolate, and for a very long time. He wouldn't even let him stay in so it wouldn't look good on both of them. And considering this has happened many times, yeah. We can't really blame him either, he still had greater difficulty with relationing w basically anyone, even if we're talking about Kayn. Like yeah, this sucks, but can we really blame someone who never had any time to develop and getting to understand n adknowledge their mistakes? Yeah I don't think so.

If it's somethin small however both would ask help for eachother so they're cool on that. Let them hug you bitches.

I think I'm sayin enough on this N NO IT'S NOT CUZ IM EXTREMELY ATTACHED TO EM ALRIGHT, I CARE FOR MY CHILDREN EQUALLY😡 (/j)

Lyva/Myst-

The comic im workin on kinda touches on this, but I'm gonna go further onto It. For instance, Myst Is probably the one that Is the first to forgive n Lyva havin some difficulty with telling him what she's feeling. They both had Little moments when this happened until now but still,they cannot get onto too soon nor too nicely.

Like yeah Myst would get over It in like one/two days, but as for Lyva she needs a lot of more time go come to understanding one another. Idk if I have to Say more onto this so in case send me and ask jejfhjed

Tags undercut:

@a-chaotic-dumbass @spoopy-fish-writes @dopesaladlady @nadi-117 @audre-falrose