#it never fucking ends
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I would like to not participate in society anymore
i really think some of you are just lazy…like omg what do you mean I have to do the dishes again I just did them yesterday?!?
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I am the horniest asexual I stfg I need there to be sex all the time thinking of it looking at it reading it writing it just pls I don't want to be involved
#lgbt#lgbtqia#ace#acespec#asexuality spectrum#asexuality#asexual#ace pride#fandom#ao3#fic#fic shit#gentlebeard#bloodweave#bakudeku#destiel#ineffable husbands#nandermo#sterek#etc#it never fucking ends#lgbtq+
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Well I think I’m missing my flight
#the magnus archives#the magnus institute#the magnus institute archives#tma#timothy stoker#tma rp#rp#god fucking dammit#i swear to god#it never fucking ends#my life is a nightmare#I wasn’t even flying delta and still it’s a nightmare
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.... Am I just obsessed with the same people over and over again and again ?
#asoiaf#sansa stark#sandor clegane#sansan#ted lasso#roy kent#keeley jones#roy x keeley#IT NEVER FUCKING ENDS#THE OBSESSION NEVER ENDS
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I should do something about the ten scp tabs I still have open
*starts reading one*
*i now have 13 scp tabs open*
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My 65Ib malinois keeps gets bullied by our 9Ib cats who keep stealing his food, which their tummies don't like and they then tear through our new apartment spewing it back up in the hardest to reach places...
Big sigh
He's a cute little shit at least
#things have not quieted down yet#I'm really starting to struggle but I'm trying to find humor anywhere i can#our old house is an hour away and I'm still going back and forth between there trying to finish everything#with an 8 month old (almost 9!)#it never fucking ends#my husband works 5 days a week and has his master's class all day on Saturday#so it's just me 6 days a week to finish the house and keep the animals and baby alive in addition to actual day-to-to household stuff#things are hitting me really hard today#I'll be okay#just#yuh know#sometimes there's a little sobbing in the laughter
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I'm so happy that at least in motogp i can breathe without seeing russians because they are always lased in f1 history, they still try to push that fucking shwartzman there too and into indy, they are in wec. THEY ARE EVERYWHERE
And I can't even express my fury because I'm not gonna be called racist/nazi/xenophobic but when people do same thing to Israeli it's ok. I can't be angry at nation that killed my granddad my uncle and probably many more in my family tree. I can't be anything other than thankful for support even if it's never fucking enough because my timeline looks like necrolog.
All i see when I'm online is either other Ukrainians trying to crowdfund ammunition for our soldiers without much success because everyone and our economy is exhausted or news about how new forces join russians to kill us. It's their only goal.
And you can't just fucking cherry pick those russians you like to say that they aren't guilty. They need to embrace consequences of what their politicians are doing. You can't be innocent and russian at the same time, one of very few truly good russians died recently fighting on the side of Ukraine. Our outlook on life becoming so individualistic we don't realise that power is hold by masses, that if they wanted for war to stop those "simple russians" could just stop going to war. Their system is extremely corrupt, it's easy to escape being drafted. Only times they protest is when they get denied another app. There millions of them and somehow just dozens of those caught by police for protest. They just don't fucking care and you continue to defend them online
#I can't be angry at systematic genoside of Ukrainians that have been going for mych longer than I've been alive#I can't say wrong word or i get fucking torn apart by people with no empathy and too much internet presence#i need to patiently explain every single person in their dm's why russians are bad and why you shouldn't support them. i need to say it over#and over and over in hopes that someone gonna hear me and not just block#i need to be understanding of people not giving shit about what's going on here#and my god. sometimes i wish to just be striken by a missile so it all can stop#but it won't. it's just that other would need to fight then. and it's other that fight already because so many of people i looked up to#are already killed and long since buried. and it hurts every day. it never stops and alk i can do is go online and try to hide#only to be found by fucking russians in those “safe spaces” again#it never fucking ends#disclaimer that “you” in this post doesn't target anyone specific. there a lot of people online like that#MotoGP#f1#formula one#indycar#idk maybe someone gonna see this and understand something. but probably not#but I'm still hurting and i need to let it out at least once because I'm not sure if i ever let myself voice this
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#subconciousmind#subconscious#aesthetic#vintage#art#funny#comic strip#self awareness#internal monologue#dj#it never fucking ends
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I seriously can't see any kind of future for myself
#besides being alone unwanted and forgotten i guess#im stuck reliving the same year over and over again#every time fall begins i am once again a miserable suicidal teenager#it never fucking ends
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just made a 7 minutes long voice recordings of me basically breaking down at the fact that i feel like a failure for not being able to complete simple tasks.
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Opening my phone to pop culture news, social media, etc on a near daily basis like:
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WHADDA HELLLLL, i do not need this sickness bullshit right now
#i finished the article and i was going to go work on comms and reblog more friend stuff but i'm suddenly soaked in sweat#i'm gonna go rinse off and see if that helps but hhhhhh#it never fucking ends#vent
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why does my body have to have something wrong with it everyday. I can't have one day that's just like. fine. no, there's a list of 10 different illnesses that fate just closes its eyes and throws darts at each morning.
#today im nauseous and my knee hurts and my head hurts#yesterday it was fatigue and back pain#some days its my stomach some days its my bones some days im tired#it never fucking ends#thanks eds
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Me: I think it'd be cool to celebrate 'Dimples' first birthday (yes my fic has a birthday) by posting the sequel to it that started off as a one-shot and ballooned into a multichapter fic
Also me: has been working on literally anything but the 'Dimples' sequel, and hasn't touched the document in months.
Also-also me: what if I posted the 'Bad Karma' sequel on BK's birthday?
#it never fucking ends#there's too many ideas#this is a hell of my own making (affectionate)#reservoir dogs#fanfic#writers#writing#wip#this isn't even the first time I've thought of this#it gets funnier the closer I get to May
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i need to draw the bad luck ref and i need to draw 98! bad luck and i need to draw my wols and i need to draw teeny roberto and i need to dra
#it never fucking ends#don't get me wrong i love it#i love drawing and art and making things#i just also have a backlog of video games i need to get through#i still haven't beaten god of war 2018#i want to so bad
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