#it makes the pre end of the world world feel so much bigger while still mostly remaining within gravitas itself

[arolesbianism]

Thinking abt how much I love oni's writing again... In particular, "a seed is planted" continues to be one of if not my favorite logs because despite the troubling details and implications that come with it, it's the one thing in the entirety of the decaying corpse of gravitas that genuinely leaves us with a grain of hope (a seed if you will) and makes oni as a whole a lot more bitter sweet as while earth may not have survived, the dupes did, and after their horrible origins and the shit that many of them went through, in due time they'll finally get to just live, they're free now, and even if Olivia's sleep is end of a tragedy, the world will keep moving forward with or without those who've been lost

[corroded-hellfire]

I just need pre-relationship AYW!Eddie all pent up and feral for Reader. I need him whimpering when he touches himself after Reader leaves for the evening. I need him trying to picture anyone else besides his kids’ babysitter but he keeps picturing Reader.

Your wish is my command! 😘

Warnings: male masturbation, smut, p in v, unprotected (wrap it up), older!eddie, babysitter!reader, the longing is real

Words: 2.4k

[As You Wish masterlist]

“Go to sleep now,” you grumble playfully, ruffling Luke’s curls as he smiles up at you from his bed.

“One more story?” Luke asks, though his voice betrays how sleepy he already is.

“Come on, buddy,” Eddie says from the doorway. “She’s been nice enough to stay for dinner and read you two bedtime stories already.”

A smile that steals Eddie’s breath grows on your lips as you turn to look at your boss.

“You make it sound like such a hardship,” you quip.

“I don’t think your union allows for overtime,” Eddie replies.

You let out a soft giggle and Eddie feels his insides begin to melt. It’s catastrophically unfair, the effect you have on him. Not in his whole life has Eddie met someone who so effortlessly turns him on and makes his heart race. As impossible as it is to ignore the feelings, Eddie tries not to linger on them for a few reasons. One, you’re a complete pipe dream. There is no way you, beautiful, intelligent, compassionate, and hilarious you would ever see a man over a decade older than you in the same light that he sees you. Two, and which he admits is arguably the bigger reason, is that he’s married. Sure, it hasn’t been a real marriage in…God knows how long. But it’s still a legally binding marriage that he hasn’t even attempted to separate from. Not for lack of want, though. It’s hard to see a point when it would cause the breakup of his boys’ family, and for what? So Eddie could be all alone in some smaller unfamiliar home that he struggles to afford on his own while caring for his sons, only getting to see them half the time he does now? No. He basically is doing it all alone right now, with the lack of input from Brittany, but at least Luke and Ryan are in the home they know and the two combined household incomes can give them a pretty good life.

Unfortunately, all the logic in the world can’t cure Eddie’s addiction to you.

“Close your eyes, sleepyhead.��� You stand up from the edge of the four-year-old’s bed and lean over to press a kiss to his forehead.

The way you bend down towards the boy gives Eddie a spectacular view of your ass. He’s forced to dig his nails into the palms of his hands to suppress the groan that so desperately wants to escape. As much as he internally chides himself, Eddie can’t tear his eyes away either. He gets so few chances to just look at you, that he can’t bring himself to cut this precious time short.

“Night night,” Luke says through a yawn.

“Night, pal,” Eddie says.

You boop your index finger against the little boy’s nose before standing up straight and heading in Eddie’s direction. The two of you exit into the hallway and Eddie closes the door almost all the way–leaving it open just a crack to allow some of the hallway light in.

The two of you are silent as you walk to the living room, both silently dreading that it’s time to part for the evening. You swipe your bag up from the couch and slip it onto your shoulder.

“I guess I’ll, uh, see you tomorrow,” you say, reluctantly taking steps toward the front door.

“Thanks for staying longer than you had to,” Eddie says, walking you to the door like always. He feels like he should add the words “for the boys” to the end of his sentence, but he can’t bring himself to. As much as the boys adore you, Eddie knows he is without a doubt the happiest one that you stayed for dinner and until bedtime.

“It was fun,” you tell him. “I always have fun here.”

“Always?” Eddie teases, raising his eyebrows. “Can I remind you that you said that the next time Luke has a meltdown?”

“Sure,” you reply with a chuckle.

The electricity in the air threatens to spark at any moment as Eddie reaches around you to open the front door.

“Drive careful, sweetheart,” he says.

“No,” you tease with a playful smirk. “I’m going to drive recklessly. Run all the red lights.”

“Don’t give me reason to worry,” Eddie mumbles, knocking his shoulder against yours.

“Aww,” you coo. “You worry about me?”

Heat rises to Eddie’s cheeks and he desperately wills it to move back down his body.

“Alright, smart ass.” Eddie wrinkles his nose up and pretends to shove you out the door.

With a laugh, you playfully stumble down the walkway a few steps, acting as if his push was that strong.

“Oh, fine!” you lament over-dramatically. “I’ll be a good girl! Bye, Eddie.”

A good girl. Suddenly, Eddie wishes that heat and blood would stay in his face instead of rushing to his groin like it currently is.

“Bye, sweetheart.”

The moment you’re safely in your car and Eddie hears the engine start, he closes the front door and groans in time with the locking mechanism clicking into place.

“This just feels cruel,” he mumbles to himself as he rests his forehead against the cool wood of the door. He lets himself stand there until he hears your car rumble down the road and off into the night.

It takes a Herculean effort to push himself up and head deeper into the house. Out of habit, Eddie glances at the clock on the wall to see if Brittany will be home soon or not. It’s useless though—there’s never a set time she comes home. Who knows where she is or what she’s doing? Or who she’s doing. The pseudo-schedule the household used to follow has fallen by the wayside, so Eddie mentally tells himself to ignore it altogether. Easier said than done, of course.

When Eddie steps into the hallway it’s silent. No sounds of Luke sneaking out of bed to play with his toys or Ryan fumbling for his flashlight to read beneath his covers. Heaving a sigh, Eddie decides he might as well take care of the situation in his pants.

Despite Brittany not being home, Eddie locks the bedroom door behind him. Luke has also started the bad habit of opening any and every door without knocking first. So, better to be safe than sorry.

“Okay, think of someone else,” Eddie says to himself as he rids himself of his clothes. “Anyone else. Not her.”

It shouldn’t be hard to think of another woman to get himself off. Hell, for the entirety of Eddie’s teenage years, he could’ve jacked it to almost any woman and it would be great. Now he can’t seem to get this one specific, unattainable woman out of his mind.

He shucks the last of his clothes off and lays down on his bed, wracking his brain for someone who can get the job done. Julia Roberts? Nah. Jennifer Aniston? No. Cindy Crawford? Nope. Nicole Kidman? Maybe….no. Aunt Viv from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air? The first, not the second one. Still no.

“Fuck,” Eddie groans, letting his eyes fall closed as he wraps his hand around his semi-hard shaft. He licks over his lips and tries to let himself relax. The only way Eddie is going to be able to take care of this problem is to think about you and he knows it. He also knows he needs to hurry up if he wants to finish before Brittany comes home.

The mere thought of the woman who sleeps next to him at night has him softening slightly in his hand. A snort of laughter comes out, Eddie finding that humorous. Objectively, Brittany is beautiful, but knowing the rot and decay that lays just beneath the surface ruins any attractiveness Eddie could ever find in her anymore. Even though he already knows what will happen, Eddie immediately switches his thoughts over to you to see the effect. It’s instant. His cock comes to life at the very thought of your name.

No shit, Eddie thinks to himself as he opens his legs a little wider. Because she’s literally a fucking goddess. God, those eyes. Eddie’s hand grips himself a little tighter and moves down towards the base.

“Say you’re a good girl again, baby,” Eddie mumbles under his breath. Fuck, he can’t believe he was lucky enough to hear those words come from your lips. Jesus, he can hardly imagine being lucky enough to come home to you at the end of the day. Walking in the door after work and seeing you is already what he looks forward to all day, he can’t fathom how he would feel if you greeted him with a kiss and stayed there with him and the boys all night. And once the boys go to bed it’s time for some fun.

“Please.”

The word tumbles from Eddie’s lips but he’s not entirely sure what he’s asking for. You to be there with him? You to be by his side always? You to be here, naked, with your hand around him instead of his own?

Okay, Eddie thinks, shifting to make himself more comfortable. There we go, think about coming home to her.

He begins to slowly stroke his cock up and down.

Eddie imagines walking through the front door and kicking his boots off. Your voice hums sweetly from the kitchen and it brings a smile to his face.

“What smells so good, huh?” he asks as he strolls into the room.

The sight he’s greeted by is almost enough to bring him to his knees. You stand at the counter, facing him, an apron on and a bowl full of cake batter held in your hands.

“Welcome home,” you say.

Dark brown eyes follow your every move as you slowly dip your forefinger into the batter and pop it into your mouth. Eddie finds himself holding his breath as you slide your finger out from between your plush pink lips at a torturous pace.

As if the first time wasn’t enough, you dip your finger back in, but instead of putting it in your mouth this time, you point your finger up and stick your tongue out to lick every speck of vanilla batter off of it.

“Oh, fuck me,” Eddie moans.

With a soft laugh, you set the bowl down and look up at Eddie through your thick eyelashes.

“Funny. I was going to say that to you.”

A rough growl reverberates from Eddie’s chest as he moves forward to grab you by the hips. It’s only once he has his hands on you that he realizes not only are you wearing the apron—you’re wearing only the apron.

“God damn, baby,” he mutters. Calloused hands slide back just slightly and come into contact with your bare ass. He drops his head forward to rest against yours with a helpless whine.

You giggle, tilting your head up to brush your nose against his.

“I like the sounds you make,” you tell him, voice thick with lust.

Before he responds, Eddie presses a few gentle kisses along your bare shoulder and up the side of your throat.

“I want to hear your noises, too.”

“Hmm,” you hum. “I don’t think that’ll be very hard to manage.” You reach up with your left hand and tug on the tied apron string resting on the nape of your neck. The front of the apron falls down, leaving your entire torso exposed to Eddie.

A guttural groan meets your ears as strong hands grab you by the waist and help you up onto the counter. Immediately, you spread your legs and Eddie stands between them, the two of you fighting with the apron to get it all the way off you.

Eddie tosses it over his shoulder as you wrap your legs around his waist, pulling the two of your bodies as close as possible.

“Eddie,” you whine, reaching up to bury your fingers in his unruly curls.

“What baby?” His breath brushes against your lips, sending a pleasant shiver down your spine.

“Need you.” Using your grip on his hair, you pull Eddie’s face down to crash against yours.

Mouths meet, lips dancing, tongues exploring, and teeth clashing. Strong yet gentle fingertips dig into your skin, yearning to hold you as tight as humanly possible. Nothing is close enough.

Eddie pulls back just enough to playfully nip at your bottom lip.

“Being such a good girl for me,” he rasps.

A smile tugs at the corners of your mouth as you run your nose along the edge of Eddie’s jawline.

“Wanna be so good for you. Wanna feel you, Eddie. Pretty please?”

A smug smirk grows on Eddie’s face as he reaches between your two bodies to unzip his navy blue coveralls. You shove the material down his hips as Eddie whips his white undershirt off over his head.

“Ready for me, princess?”

Eddie lines himself up with your entrance, glancing up at your face as he waits for your approval.

“God, yes!” You nod emphatically, wiggling your hips in an attempt to get him inside of you faster.

Eddie grins at your eagerness, putting both of you out of your misery as he pushes inside.

“Fuck,” he groans.

“Oh!” You whimper, clinging to Eddie’s shoulders.

The sweet little noises spilling from your lips only encourage Eddie. He pulls almost all the way out before thrusting back into your tight wet heat. It feels as close to euphoria as Eddie’s ever felt. He wants to spend forever between your legs, but it feels far too good to last long.

“Feels so good,” you whine.

“Yeah, baby?” Eddie asks. “Like when I…oh, fuck.”

Eddie doesn’t have time to imagine what he’d say next before hot cum starts to pour over his fist.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he mumbles as his orgasm works its way through his body. His hand keeps going, milking his cock for everything that it’s worth.

Once he’s well and truly spent, Eddie lets his boneless body sink into the mattress. His arm flings over the side of the bed and his fingertips brush against his t-shirt laying on the floor. Blindly, he picks it up and wipes his coated hand off before wiping the cum off his abdomen, legs, and anywhere else it went.

“Holy shit,” Eddie sighs. His head falls to the side and his eyes slip closed. A goofy smile comes to his face as his mind returns to you. “Fuck, I’m so gone for her.”

[overtrred28]

Gnomeo and Juliet | alanna kennedy x reader

Summary; Two players steal each other's hearts and keep it from everyone because they know how controversial their relationship could be to their club’s rivalry. OR Y/N and Alanna soft launching their relationship over time until they decide to share it. *Features social media posts.*

Pairings; Alanna Kennedy x Manchester United reader

Words; 2.2k

Warnings; swearing (i think that's it)

A/N; i literally love alanna so much and don't think there are enough posts about her so naturally i write one. i just thought this was cute and different from a chealse v arsenal rivalry (though i really love those). enjoy and please give it some love and feedback xx

Lioness star Y/N Y/L/N set to leave her club of four years, Brighton & Hove Albion W.F.C, and join Manchester United W.F.C on a two year contract at the beginning of the 2023/2024 season. 

You had really valued your time at Brighton, starting your senior career there and blossoming into a strong forward for both the club and the England Senior Women’s team, better known as The Lionesses. 

But when the offer from Manchester United came in at the end of last season, you knew it was the right move. Leaving the team you had come to know and love was tough to say the least but the adventure before you sounded a lot more exciting. So during the break before pre-season began, you made the move to Manchester and took a few days to settle into your new home and surroundings. 

Manchester was very different from Brighton; no beach and much bigger city life, but it was a good different. You had found that everything in Manchester was so much closer, and in great reach of your new club and housing. 

You had officially settled into your new home, very quickly making it feel just like your last one, then decided to go exploring through the city. The first thing a person would normally do would probably be going shopping or searching for a new café to become the regular, but you had spotted the Manchester Art Gallery and decided to go in. 

It was quiet, as expected for midday on a Wednesday when most people were at work, but you found it peaceful. It was a break from the regular hustle and bustle of your regular life as a professional footballer. 

It wasn’t until a particular painting caught your eyes that you realised someone else was in there, because you quite literally walked into them. 

“Shit. I’m so sorry.” You apologised quickly to the taller person, picking up their phone you had knocked out of their hand, from the floor. “Here…” Your voice trailed off as you met bright blue eyes while handing them their phone.

“It’s all good, thank you.” The woman met your eyes and she also felt the world pause around her, you were no longer in the gallery but just in a moment of time with each other. 

“Sorry the painting distracted me.” You snapped out of your trance and nodded to the painting on the wall; the story of Romeo and Juliet portrayed on a large canvas. 

“Well it is quite captivating.” Alanna spoke, still looking at you, now at the side of your face as you looked at the painting. 

“It is.” Your eyes fell back to hers and realised she was still staring at you, a slight blush rose to your cheeks, both smiling at each other. “Hi.” You extended your hand out, indicating a handshake. 

“Hi.” She laughed at your chivalry for a second before shaking your hand. “Nice to meet you.” She spoke softly in the quiet gallery.

“You too.” You smiled up at her, quite literally encapsulated by her. 

That was three weeks ago before you decided to get coffee after finishing a self led tour of the gallery, then the conversation kept going and you ended up at dinner together, continuing to learn about one another until the night ended. 

What you didn’t seem to bring up was that you both knew who each other were, but there was a mutual agreement that it didn’t matter. You weren’t professional footballers who had gone up against multiple times in the past at both national and club level, you were just two people who met and wanted to get to know each other. 

Now you were both deep into pre pre-season, you at Man United, her at Man City, and there wasn’t as much time to meet up for fun dates every night, now relying on text messages and late night calls before bed to catch up. 

The first kiss took a while to get to, but boy was it worth it. 

You had both decided to keep whatever this was between the two of you, soaking in the quiet moments shared in one anothers apartments and over long phone calls. It was still labelled a friendship, you both knew you wanted more, both scared of what the other might say if you revealed your feelings. But when you both had a free long weekend, you decided to take Alanna down to Brighton and show her your old home, soaking in the last of the warm weather before winter began to creep in. 

It was the best decision you could have made, relishing in being able to spend time together away from your normal lives. You had rented a small air bnb right near the beach, enjoying the solitude together as you cooked together and watched the sun rise and set each day by the ocean. 

It was on the second night after dinner that she finally made her move, unable to swallow the feelings bubbling inside her. You sat on the beach alone as you waited for Alanna to join, wrapping your arms around yourself to shelter from the cool breeze. 

A blanket had been wrapped around your shoulders and a warm body nuzzled into your side, a small smile on your face as you rested your head on her shoulder, Alanna looking down at you as you watched the waves crash. No words were said for what felt like ages, the only sounds being the waves and the seagulls heading off to bed. 

“Y/N.” Alanna suddenly spoke, a thick Aussie accent breaking the silence. 

“Hmmm.” You hummed in response, keeping your head in its place. 

“I want more than this.” Her statement made you move your head, turning it to meet her blue eyes. 

“More?” You spoke softly. 

“More.” She nodded with a small smile before she moved her hands from her legs, twisting to cup your face before moving closer. You thought she was going to kiss you straight away but her forehead came to rest on yours, both closing your eyes as you basked in the silence. 

“Just kiss me already.” You breathed out and she smiled before closing the gap, joining your lips in a strong kiss. Her hands cupped your face, yours held her waist before trailing up to meet her face. It was passionate but soft, saying so much without any words and your heart grew. 

y/n.y/l/n.. just posted a story

alannakennedy just posted a story

Since you were both heavily in the public eye, it was an easy decision for you both to keep this new found relationship to yourselves, not wanting to receive any unwanted attention from the media, fans and even your own teammates. 

You were able to keep it that way for a while, without you guys being on the same national team or at the same club keeping this secret relationship a secret was quite easy. And since no one thought you would even know each other personally, there were no fans sifting through evidence to put two and two together. Of course though, you both wanted to show each other off, you were so happy and so was Alanna, so maybe a soft launch would be best until you decided to go fully public. 

It started small.

y/n.y/l/n.. just posted a story

alannakennedy made a post

alanna kennedy almost as good as home

y/n.y/l/n.. made a post

y/n.y/l/n.. felt like a fairy tale

alannakennedy just posted a story

Your teammates began to ask about the secretive posts, hammering you about it in the locker rooms at training, Alanna's friends and teammates doing the same.

“When are you going to tell us more about these mystery posts?” Mary had asked Alanna while she was tying her boots before training. Alanna paused for a second before sitting up and looking up at the other Australian. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Alanna simply shrugged with a straight face before standing up and walking away. 

“Oi mate.” Ella Toone had caught your attention as you walked out to the carpark after a late friday night training session. You paused and turned around, waiting for her to catch up, instantly wrapping an arm around your shoulder as she met you. 

“What’s up?” You turned to her as you walked towards your cars.

“Few of us are going round Zelly’s to watch a movie, you in?” She asked with hopeful eyes. 

“Sorry love, got plans.” You apologised, knowing you had a certain blonde already waiting for you at your apartment.

“This wouldn’t have anything to do with a possible mystery woman you refuse to tell us about, would it?” Ella asks with a suggestive smirk, nudging your shoulder as you remain stoic. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You simply shrugged and patted her shoulder as you let go of her, walking to your car door. “Goodnight Tooney.” You waved before getting in and racing home to Alanna, preparing for your own movie night of Gnomeo and Juliet and a weekend spent in each other's arms.

The day had come, the one you and Alanna refused to talk about until the night before.. It was the Manchester derby day. The day every City and United fan had waited for and the one you and Alanna dreaded. 

y/n.y/l/n.. made a post

y/n.y/l/n.. Derby day. Let's bring it on home red's! ❤️

alannakennedy made a post

alannakennedy The day we've all be waiting for. Come on blue! 💙

Sure you had come up against each other in the past at both club and national level, but you had yet to do it since being in a relationship together. So it was going to be different this time; harder. You both decided it would be best for your teams if you didn't interact with one another from the moment you joined your teams for the match, and until that final whistle blew.

The plan was going well during the first half of the match; Alanna had started with City in the defensive line and you were sitting on the bench waiting to get subbed on. Katie Zelem had secured the United side a goal through a penalty early on, but City fired back and took the lead 2-1 at halftime. 

You got subbed on for Nikita Parris at the very beginning of half time, taking her place as the left forward and a strong striker. Though this became a slight issue because of who was currently defending the City goal and in charge of blocking your shots at goal; your very own girlfriend. But in that moment you had to act like you didn’t know who she was on a personal level, right now you were just opposing players who both wanted their teams to win. 

It was hard for you both to act like that, stealing glances on the pitch, brushing past each other ever so slightly without anyone noticing too much. You had both been able to get away with this secret relationship so far because you’ve haven’t had to be in the same place yet, but maybe it was time for that to change. 

The final whistle blew and City had won 3-1, your side not being able to score any further goals despite your best efforts. You looked around at all your teammates, defeated looks all over as City celebrated together before exchanging handshakes with the other team. 

You and Alanna had purposefully left each other till last, waiting until you could be alone with each other in a busy and full stadium. You had finally found the blonde Australian and began walking towards her and she finally locked eyes with you. Seconds before you had very different expressions, one filled with happiness and one filled with disappointment. But as soon as you got closer the one expression you both shared was one filled with love, and your heart melted as she brought you straight into a hug rather than a friendly handshake. 

Her hands wrapped around your waist as her slightly taller frame leant down, your hands found their way around her neck before you buried your head in her neck. An instant feeling of warmth and security flowed through both of your bodies as you hugged, Alanna pressing a soft kiss to your neck as she buried her own face in your shoulder. 

Confused looks fell to both sets of teams at the interaction, at first because of the more than friendly hug and second because of the familiarity they could sense between the two of you. 

“I’m so proud of you.” You murmured, still holding tight around Alanna’s neck. 

“You played so well, it was a tough game.” She spoke back instantly, squeezing your waist before slowly pulling back to look at you. You smiled at her as you exited the hug, genuinely happy for her but still very upset your own team couldn’t secure the win like they wanted. 

“You should go celebrate.” You nodded to the City team who gathered in the middle, preparing for their post-match huddle, your team doing the same further down on the pitch, all players still watching the interaction with lost eyes.

“I’ll find you after and we’ll go home together.” Alanna nodded to you, looking down to your now interlocked hands, a small laugh leaving her lips. “This is going to be everywhere tonight.” She looked back up at you as a small smile grew on your face. 

“Definitely.” You laughed too. “Are you okay with that?” You raised a brow at her. 

“Yeah. I’m ready to show off my girl.” She winked playfully at you, now both of you laughing, shaking your head at her before playfully pushing her shoulder and walking over to your team. 

y/n.y/l/n.. made a post

y/n.y/l/n.. the gnomeo to my juliet

tagged @alannakennedy

alannakennedy made a post

alannakennedy my girl in red

tagged @y/n.y/l/n

THE END

[orphiclovers]

I think the most notable bit of character insight on Yoo Joonghyuk that Yoo Mia SS provides is how much the apocalypse did not change him at all.

It's one of those Big Themes orv has, and simply brilliant writing. Y'know how they kept beating us over the head with the concept of 'the people who find it easiest to adapt in a ruined world are those who could not adapt to real life?'. That applies to YJH too, and even more than other characters. But it's hard to notice on a casual main story read because genre conventions and his character archetype tell us not to look deeper, that he is just a basic brooding power fantasy manhwa protagonist, even when he's really not.

So the audience writes off his quirks because it's expected of his brooding hero archetype and the other apocalypse survivors write off his quirks because everyone who has gotten this far is a little nuts and also they have bigger problems.

But when Yoo Joonghyuk acts exactly like he does during the apocalypse in a pre-scenario world where there's no convienient explanation it's really clear that he is different and he just comes off as...off.

His silence during conversations is no longer mysterious and cool but just weird and a failure to read social cues. His 'glare' is frightening and people don't like when he makes eye contact with them. His manner of speech is off-putting. His blank emotionless face is not stoic repressed hero-esque but ""rude"" etc etc. Every single mainstream society conforming person can tell there's something off about him so they avoid him. And YJH doesn't know how to communicate so he ends up totally friendless (save for a literal mafia boss and a crazy time-traveling teenage girl - and only them, because they don't fit well into society either.)

Umm where was I. So, but I don't know how much effect all of that has on World of Zero. Firstly, because between Yoo Mia side story and World of Zero there are 3-4 years of '?????' where afaik we have no idea what Yoo Joonghyuk was doing. He stopped being a gamer at some point but also got rich at the same time (doing what?) and bought the house he daydreamed about and also became a total shut-in who 'doesn't go outside often'. I have fanfic-y theories but nothing canon.

Onto the second part of the ask.

With World of Zero era joongdok I feel like there's a lot of writers out there who have made their own versions that are better than anything I could come up with so I hope you wont be disapointed. That being said I do have some thoughts.

Speaking of fanfic, here is mine under read more lol.

I think it's super that Kim Dokja gains the power of an omnipotent god and the very first thing he does is devote his time to Yoo Joonghyuk's happiness and safety. The whole reason he became OD was because of his massive guilt complex about YJH, so it makes sense that he would try to atone.

Zero starts off mistrusting him but gradually KDJ proves himself as having Zero's best interests at heart 100% of the time. DKOS is YJH's guardian angel. And then KDJ stays watching over him even after the scenarios were over, seeing him go through boring life milestones, happy as long as YJH is happy, for seemingly no reason.

So it's no wonder Yoo Jooghyuk fell in love.

He might not know Salvation's real name or appearance or anything about him but he wants to get to know him, this person who has saved him so many times while asking nothing in return. It doesn't matter that he's a constellation because he is good, Yoo Joonghyuk knows. He confesses all of this to Salvation, looking up at the sky with eyes sparkling with life and passion.

Salvation lets him down gently, for what it's worth, but rejection is still rejection and it hurts.

In the following weeks, as he goes through the motions and pretends nothing happened, he continues to feel the gaze of Salvation on his back, but the constellation stays mercifully silent. Yoo Joonghyuk does not want to know if it's pity he's looking at him with. Even heartbreak heals, of course. Months pass, then years. Lee Seolhwa was a dependable companion to him during the scenarios and stays a steadying presence in the world after. They're compatable. She is someone with who he could see himself growing old.

Salvation told him to 'be free, to fall in love with someone who could be with him, to not waste his time chasing after a dream, to live his life to the fullest'

He knows about his attribute of course, just like he knows everything about Yoo Joonghyuk.

Yoo Joonghyuk sees no point in lying. He tells Lee Seolhwa everything. How due to his attribute he will grown old and die while the rest of them stay youthful as ever, how he doesn't remember his childhood or know his parents. His hopes and dreams, how he yearns to learn his origins. About the first scenario, about the constellation who would have been his sponsor, whom he loves.

Then he asks to marry her. She says yes.

Salvation is the first person Yoo Joonghyuk tells. He's happy for him, of course, says he always knew there was a spark between them.

They live a long 50 years together.

When Yoo Joonghyuk's hair started turning more salt than pepper, he told Lee Seolhwa that he wouldn't hold her. She laughed, stroked his head and said that she might not look it but she is two years older than him, that she vowed to be by his side till death did them apart and she will not break that promise.

When his time comes and he knows he has to leave, he tries to explain himself to Lee Seolhwa at least, if not the rest of his old companions. But he needn't have bothered. Before he could start, she took his hands in hers and smiled wistfully. She told him she always knew this day would come. That his heart has always belonged to someone else. She's thankful for the time he has given her anyway and that she could not have asked for a better husband. She sheads a few tears and Yoo Joonghyuk does too, but he leaves their house with a sense of purpose and a lightness in his heart he has not felt once since the day he beat the final scenario.

And then he accepts the sponsorship contract with Salvation.

... .. Sooo, that's how I think round zero went.

[surr3al1sm]

I just wanted to come on here and make a little celebration post because Maybe Loving You is Dangerous has officially hit 100 kudo's! That number is like genuinely insane to me because I was expecting it to get like 30, max. I cannot believe it oh my god. I'm so grateful for everyone that has read my fic so far, that has left a kudo's, that has left a comment. It all really means the world to me, thank you so much. I truly wouldn't have been able to do any of this without you guys. I'm so happy you enjoyed the story so far, and I'm so excited for what's coming next because I get to have some fun. I hope you guys will like it! Now, surpisingly or not, I am very bad at talking about myself and my accomplishments. And since it's my celebration post I get to do what I want. Today that is being nice to some other writers. So I decided to leave a little note to the authors that inspired me to write and actually publish this fic under the cut. (So if you got tagged, that might be why). Feel free to read these notes if you want to, it's truly just me being an insufferable fanboy. If you did not get tagged, but we are mutuals (or friends) just know that you might have also had a role in the inspiration and motivation departments of this fic.

A note to @halfratsalready: I'm sure this comes as a surpise to no one, and I warned you I was going to tag you in something. But yeah, being very real and sappy with you: you're like one of my biggest inspirations for this. I was, and still am, absolutely enamored by the Lose Yourself series. I honestly feel confident enough to say that its my favourite Just Dance fic, ever. It's genuinely so well written and you executed everything so perfectly. I loved inserting it into my weekly schedule and I felt so inspired to write afterwards. I'm going to be a little sneaky and say that the whole reason I started even thinking about possibly writing a pre-canon fic. So truly, MLYiD owes Lose Yourself it's life. I joke around sometimes and call you my target audience, but honestly? You are. Everything I write is with your enjoyment in mind. I really do catch myself thinking "I hope Oboe likes this" while writing lol. I will forever be your nbr 1 fanboy, and I am so glad that we're friends. I wouldn't have it any other way.

A note to @libra-cant-just-dance: Hello there! You're the only one in here I haven't talked to, but I still wanted to tag you and tell you how much I love your fic. The Tainted City was such a great fic. I loved the plot and your story telling and the way you describe things is just so amazing. I really look up to it. The Tainted City was a bigger inspiration for my other fic than for this one, but honestly without it I doubt I would have ever started posting fics. So really, I owe you one at this point. Your fics are amazing and I cannot wait to see what you end up doing with Mirrored Walls!

A note to @lightning-and-sparks: Thorns was the first Just Dance fanfic I have ever read, and it will always be one of my favourites. I genuinely enjoy the story and you're such a good author as well. I'm so glad it's back and that I get to read weekly updated for it again. As you know, it is a very big inspiration for MLYiD and I might have accidentally stolen a few things from it but that was all in good faith and because it was all so good that I just had to. Keep it up, I need infinite Throns content (please.)

[atiny-for-life]

Golden Hour feels different and I think I know why...

This album feels a lot less cohesive than all others they've ever released. I'm by no means saying it's bad or you shouldn't enjoy it or support the comeback, but it's still something noteworthy.

They said they were really happy making this album, which is amazing and I'm glad they've been enjoying all the new opportunities they've been getting, but when I listen to most of these songs, I feel like we' we've been given a folder from the producer's computer with all the leftover/unfinished tracks, and I think I may know why that is.

First, I wanna say what I mean by the album being less cohesive: Ateez are big on concept albums. The songs tell a story, they're connected, both conceptiually and lyrically, even as we switch genres. Look to the Fever and World Series where you can track the themes even without knowing about their storyline.

Ateez are also famous for their cinematic songs - Inception, Answer, Guerrilla, Halazia - the instrumentals are layered, interwoven, it feels like you're on a journey as you listen to it. You start in one place and don't know where you're headed until you get there. They're full of unique instruments, random noises, hidden harmonies from Maddox and the vocal line. It's art.

And now move on to Blind, Work, Shaboom, and it's one beat in the back that switches up as we move along but there's nothing new to notice on repeat listens, nothing remarkable to pick out. Wooyoung summed it up as "easy listening" in their KStar Next Door interview. Lyrically, Work is also a lot more repetitive which is something Ateez historically stayed clear of because Mingi and Hongjoong especially are very invested in the writing process and want the songs to have meaning.

Proving my point, they mentioned during the Preview Live that Mingi and Hongjoong worked more on Empty Box and Siren, with Siren even being a contender for the title track and Empty Box being their collective favorite and, hey, look at that, those two are the only songs on the album which are a lot more complex on all fronts, a lot more similar to their usual approach to music.

Looking at the bigger picture, I absolutely don't think it was laziness which led to the slight drop in quality. I think KQ just has a pre-planned release schedule where everything is organized so they can squeeze in comeback promotions between tour schedules and, this time, they had to find a way to squeeze in Coachella, which is an opportunity you simply cannot turn down and they made a judgment call and decided to take preparation time away from the album.

Regardless of how Ateez felt about this, they worked their asses off, and while they're already in the US, they attend interviews, take extra classes, film the music video etc. and thus, weeks of album preparations are now spent on Coachella-related schedules. As a result, there ultimately just wasn't enough time to hole up in the studio as much as they normally would've which, as a performer, must be a whole lot more fun, but isn't so great when you're just a listener.

The Edenary team is still responsible for most of the songs, of course, but they're now also working for Xikers which is likely possible because Hongjoong now has years of experience under his belt and can compose full songs or add finishing touches himself whenever needed while also working on Xikers' music on occasion - we've seen him credited multiple times.

On top of that, they also used a live band at Coachella, meaning their songs had to be translated to acoustic which was most likely fully Edenary's doing and also took them away from preparing for this comeback.

These days, their albums aren't as pre-prepared anymore as they used to be a couple of years ago when we still got song teasers at the end of tracks several comebacks in advance. They've caught up by now, as we've been able to see in behind the scenes footage of Hongjoong in the studio and from his interview with Changkyun from Monsta X (I.M on the Beat) where he largely talked about working on The World - Ep Fin. which was clearly still fresh in his mind.

Normally, this wouldn't be a downside at all, but it does make scheduling conflicts like this something to be cautious about, especially looking back to how exhausted they (and most other K-pop artists) always are between December and February every single year when all the award shows come together.

Whether I'm right or not, I don't know and can't prove, but I think it makes a lotta sense and would explain some things. Either way, watching them perform Work is still fun and it's lovely to see them so happy and thriving, but I do think there'll be a noticable difference when the next album drops without any surprise schedules throwing things off course.

[heaven--scent]

8 months on Estradiol!

ive very much slowed down on my sharing of my transition recently.

HRT IS STILL THE BEST CHOICE IVE EVER MADE.

I have however been very much struggling with some dysphoria, emotional drops, and the state of world politics. My councillor has recommended that on this blog I talk about my struggles as it may help others to see someone talk about it, and for me to vent.

First I want to talk about the great strides Ive recently made in my social transition. Biggest being that over the end of the year I came out to everyone at work, and began to use my chosen name and pronouns. This was so fucking scary but I'm glad I have done so and have had no pushback from any co-workers, only confusion and questions at worst.

I have also begun to exclusively dress femme and feel comfortable shopping in the woman's section. I also have made appointments for a hair stylist and eye test to help with changing my glasses and making my hair into a femme style rather than just long and unkempt. Which I hope will help me to look more femme in general.

Some noticed HRT effects since my last update include bigger boobs, firmer ass, and a change to the way my facial fat distributes from droopy like my dad's, to higher and firmer round my cheekbones like my mums.

I also find women specifically talking to me and actively including me or talking to me far more than anyone ever did before be they staff or customers.

this month also saw the first time I got called miss in a store followed by another staff member complimenting my nails <3 double whammy!

I also saved a guy's life at work and the footage looked epic

(TW) Negative shit below the cut

Despite making progress with social aspects of my transition I have had days and a whole week plagued with dysphoria seemingly personified now by my deadname. Working in customer service while trying to pass, I've found many default to calling me he\him\sir\man, likely as my voice doesn't pass despite the visible breast bumps of my bcup bra. While I attempt to practice voice training at work, I often need to make my voice heard by shouting and using a deeper register exacerbating the problem. While I'm sure they dont Intend to misgender, it leaves its wounds. It led to a week I couldn't bare to go in. Fortunately I have plenty of sick days to use.

The emotional drops I feel like are a result of the happiness I experience on average being higher, the low isn't any lower but the height difference makes the fall hurt more partly. I think this is also a factor of those second puberty hormones doing the teenager things they do best and dramatising everything in my life. I think also that I have stopped repressing my emotions in general for the first time since maybe pre puberty 1 and not having any coping strategies yet to be more likely than to imply that girls are more emotional than boys.

I don't need to explain the part about global politics. You understand.

My rock throughout this has been my girlfriend @averyishorny her love has helped me more than words can do justice. And I can't wait to meet her when her passport gets sorted out soon so we can have epic sesbian lex .

Don't let the bastards grind you down<3

[renegadesfic]

i said this on my main blog but i have Opinions on sonetto's character growth already thru just the first 4 chapters so here are some of my thoughts.

first of all, despite everything we learn about her and vertin's history in chapter 3, sonetto treats her at the start of canon not even as an equal but as someone to be revered. this makes sense because vertin is the timekeeper, which is a highly respected position, but i think it goes beyond that. it seems like sonetto has barely interacted with vertin since what happened at the end of the flashbacks in chapter 3 - she acts like she barely knows her. to me that makes it feel like she hasn't been closely interacting with her in a while, probably since she became the timekeeper, which means that there's a chance this is one of their first times working together. at this point sonetto is still very focused on the official tasks at hand, trying to deal with the whole regulus thing, focusing on Doing Her Job. this is pre-her being appointed as vertin's assistant so it makes sense that they're working in conjunction with each other instead of sonetto helping her in such a close way.

however. in later chapter 1 and chapter 2, where we really start to see the proper story pick up, sonetto is becoming increasingly connected to the outside world. she befriends sotheby, the first person she's really connected with outside the foundation. the foundation has been her whole life for as long as she can remember, but now she's meeting Real People and making Real Friends. this, naturally, is a Big Deal - this is what starts to turn the gears in her brain that we see finish turning in ch3/ch4, where she goes to bat for vertin directly, going as far as to raise her voice on vertin's behalf. at this point in the story she's finally seeing what vertin wants Everyone to see - that there is so much more to life than serving the foundation.

and then!! sonetto, always following rules, always obeying instructions, is put in a position where the timekeeper Isn't There. she's gone, she's with the manus, and sonetto has to step up as the interim leader of the mission, since she is now the timekeeper's assistant. and she DOES!!! supported by her New Friends!!!! i personally think it would've been extremely difficult for her to make these decisions if she hadn't already been separated from vertin and met sotheby in the forest. already, her personal growth is being spurred on by being outside the foundation in a much freer context.

so not only does sonetto step up, but she makes several crucial decisions, including saving marian. this is a thing i think some people would brush off as just a "protect the peace of mankind" thing but it's more than that to me. right now sonetto is desperately trying to fix the Timekeeper Being Gone situation and she explicitly chooses to find marian, who she knew was being kept somewhere due to the traces of potion, even though there are objectively Bigger Problems. imo this isn't just her following the mantra the foundation promotes, it is also showing that she has already started to Really care about people outside of the main mission and goal at hand. she doesn't need to do that, she could just help the timekeeper get out, but she feels an obligation to not just the foundation's stated ideal of helping the people but to her own developing moral compass, her desire to protect people vertin considers important. that is crucial because we establish very early that vertin considers Everyone important, hence the photo wall and all the memorial stuff she shows regulus. so sonetto saves marian, jeopardizes her own safety, to follow her idea of what the foundation's motto should mean, instead of acting as if the mission is the only thing that matters. she's developing her own view of what protecting the peace means.

and then the end of chapter 2. sotheby, sonetto's first real friend outside the foundation walls, loses her caretaker, the person who was tasked with her safety. she is so far in over her head and instead of sticking with vertin, keeping her head down until the storm is done, and holding herself in place, she goes to comfort her. not for the first time, she leaves vertin's side - in this case the seat next to her at the table - and goes to the other side of the table to sit with sotheby and comfort her. this is representative of more than just her desire to comfort her friends - her leaving vertin's side at the table is a metaphor for her slowly peeling herself away from the rigid conformity the foundation has forced on everyone in it, choosing to stand on her own with the friends she has made in the Real World.

and then, of course, sonetto goes back to the foundation, realizes people are fucking with vertin, and gets Mad. sonetto is notable for being extremely passive unless she's protecting the timekeeper, but this goes well beyond that. in this case she is not standing up for vertin against critters or the manus - she's standing up for her against the people she's listened to without exception for her entire life so far. and she's doing it for vertin, because vertin is not just her boss, she's her Friend, and sonetto Takes Care Of Her Friends. so for probably one of the first times in her entire life sonetto raises her voice at someone in charge of her. she shows resistance against the people who she thinks are hurting vertin, and who she thinks are hurting the rest of the friends she's made.

at the very end of chapter 4, sonetto seems like she wants to say something about everything that's happened, but chooses not to. i have a feeling that she's not making that choice because she doesn't value her contribution. i think she's making that choice because whatever she was going to say was something she thought constantine wouldn't like. and she's starting to understand the concept of going behind someone's back to do things that are really important.

[alpaca-clouds]

So, the State of the Digimon Adventure canon...

So, I have a question for y'all. What the fuck is the current state of the canon of Digimon Adventure/02? I think this is a bit confusing ever since 2015 and the release of Digimon Adventure tri.

Until then it was fairly clear. Like, sure, we can discuss (as I did last week) whether movies 3 and 4 are canon or not, though in general it does not change a whole lot of about the canon, right? All in all: Yeah, the two adventures happened, and then there is the epilogue.

Now, I will openly admit. I am among the first people to criticize that epilogue. (Can you believe that this epilogue is happening in just three years? It is 2027. WTF. I am so old!) I hate that epilogue. I hate most of the jobs chosen for the kids (both for the sexism in the choices, and also in "everyone needs to be super successful - except the one stay at home mom"). I hate that everyone has kids. I hate that the kids look mostly like clones of their parents. And I don't think the "every person on the world has a digimon partner" is a good idea. However, I generally liked the idea of "more people have Digimon partners", and the "the Digimon stay with their humans" stuff.

Then of course came Digimon Adventure tri., that already did change around some stuff about this established canon. Most notably by introducing Meiko, and also the "original chosen children". While the later obviously had been referenced in Adventure before, a lot of it does not quite make sense.

More than anything, tri. very much feels like a Fanfic. Both in the way Meiko is brought in (I mean, c'mon, we all have read fanfics with OCs that were like Meiko), but also in other ways. Like the fact that the Original Chosen Children had this very random collection of Digimon partners for the most part, which happened a lot in fanfics, because most folks just did not have the time and patience to design original Digimon. But seeing this in official media was kinda... disappointing. (Just give proper evolines to the Holy Beasts, for fuck's sake.) The entire stuff with the Reboot and everything does not really fit with the established canon, though technically speaking... Based on the End State of tri., there is also not a whole lot here, that does outright contradict the ending of 02. If anything the beginning of tri., that sees the Digimon separated from the kids, is the bigger issue here, really. And of course the fact that nobody fucking wastes a thought on the 02 kids, which just seems so OoC. But yeah. It is still very isolated and because of that... is not that big of an issue.

I have never made a secret of my distaste for tri. As I said, to me it is a rather bad fanfic that got made into a movie through some miraculous circumstance. It is frustrating, but... Yeah, it does not really go to change the end state of the canon.

Then however we have the two other movies. KIZUNA and THE BEGINNING. Now, compared with tri. I like those a whole lot more. I actually had a lot of fun watching them in the cinema, and I kinda do adore them.

But these movies very much change the pre-established canon.

KIZUNA does this by saying: "Yeah, actually, once you are an adult, you will have to say good-bye to your Digimon partner."

THE BEGINNING meanwhile contradicts the established canon through: "... You guys? I think every person getting a Digimon partner is actually a really bad idea, isn't it?" (And of course also by retconning pretty much everything that was prior established about the Homeostasis.)

The ironic thing about those movies is, that it is not even clear how they relate to each other in terms of canonicity. Is tri. canon to KIZUNA? Is KIZUNA canon to THE BEGINNING? It is very vague how those movies relate to one another.

And honestly... I am mostly very confused of how we are supposed to read those movies in relation to canon.

Mind you, Japanese fandom culture generally relates differently to canonicity than western culture. Western culture tends to focus a lot more on what is canon and what is not. Japanese fandom culture just does not seem to focus that much on it - though then again, I never much interacted with Japanese fanfiction writers, who were not also very active in western fandom circles.

I mean, to me personally: While I like the two theatrical movies quite a lot, I will always ignore them in terms of canon. Like, I am sorry. I had 15 years to come up with headcanons to fill out that time, so this questionable canon comes much too late.

I will however also remain steadfast in ignoring the epilogue, because... as I said, I personally hate it.

Still, I really do wonder, whether Toei has some opinion on what is canon and what is not. Or do they simply not mind either way?

We know there is gonna be something new in January next year. And a part of me fears that this will be yet another Digimon Adventure related project. *sighs* (Just give me a new anime.)

[ruvviks]

HIIIIIIII BONES what faction(s) does tiberius join? and which companions is he closest with? :]

HIII EZRA THANK YOU SO MUCH :] this got insanely long because i have. so much to say about this game it's unreal i'm very sorry in advance. but hope you enjoy ^_^

so in my canon of fallout 4, there's a couple of things different from the game because i personally don't think of tiberius as a leader in any sort of way, mainly because he's like. 23 years old. that's a literal baby. he was only born yesterday fresh out of the freezer

so!! that means that the minutemen are already very much established in the commonwealth again when he emerges from the vault, and there's a lot of sprawling settlements to be found in places where you'd otherwise have to build them yourself in game; so sanctuary isn't abandoned at all, and tiberius returns to his sister's home with a special surprise waiting for him (every other house in the neighborhood is now home to a bunch of strangers centuries into the future! welcome home boy!)

that said, tiberius DOES end up sort of joining the minutemen?? but not officially. he meets preston in sanctuary who helps him get settled in in this new and strange world and in return to show his gratitude tiberius helps out wherever and whenever he can, but considering the path of revenge he's about to go on he doesn't really consider himself good enough of a person to like. fully be part of it if that makes sense?? especially since the minutemen aim for as much peaceful resolution of things as possible, and he is not like that :(

tiberius massively dislikes diamond city, and feels a lot more at home in goodneighbor. he does some mercenary work there for a while and that's also how he ends up with the railroad, which he Does officially join :] a bunch of my other fallout ocs are also railroad agents; max, who's also general of the minutemen (don't ask how she finds the time to juggle all these different jobs she doesn't know it herself either); magnus, who's a goodneighbor guard; and nikolai, an ex-raider who now does a bunch of stealth operations for the railroad. tiberius takes his job as agent very seriously and through his new connections becomes more involved with the minutemen as well, now that he knows the two work together to give escaped synths a new and safe home and such :]

he does NOT join the brotherhood of steel. he hates them so fucking much it's unreal. to him they're literally just invading the commonwealth with the way they're terrorizing settlements and forcibly establishing their own outposts and whatnot and it causes a lot of chaos everywhere which is NOT ideal at all. max is handling most of the situation but she's clearly under a lot of pressure and it makes tiberius want to blow some shit up. which he eventually does when everything has escalated so far that there's not really another way to deal with it anymore

he only joins the institute to infiltrate them for the railroad, and he is NOT having a good time during it. he dislikes shaun (his nephew, not his son!) so fucking much but there's nothing he can do about it. i'm trying to make the institute a bit more interesting but it's still a work in progress because well the game leaves a lot to be desired on that front to me personally but either way, the whole place makes him super paranoid and he quickly realizes that it's a LOT bigger than what it's making itself out to be. the area he's allowed to be in seems just a little bit too well-organized and streamlined as if it's all pre-programmed and he constantly feels like he's being watched. which he is! because he ends up finding proof of a lot more levels that go much deeper into the ground and while a lot of them seem to be abandoned, he does end up finding evidence that there's more people holed up Somewhere. and they're watching everything that's happening in the area of the institute he's allowed to be in. it's all part of something bigger and he does NOT like that shit

lastly, tiberius ends up with the children of atom :] kind of against his will?? but also he's not really being forced to stay so it's kind of a gray area really. basically what happened is that he went to the glowing sea, ended up passing out because he went by himself like the stubborn mf he is and the children of atom take them to their crater to nurse him back to health but also give him like. some sort of special radiation cocktail of some sort which ends up making him a bit of a freak. much more resilient, much more absent as well, a bit faster than he used to be. he's basically their chosen one because i feel like out of all factions it'd make most sense for the children of atom to be weirdly obsessed with him like he's a perfectly preserved human from before the war. that IS kinda fascinating

either way tiberius doesn't really mind being part of them all that much because it puts him in like a negotiator position if that makes sense?? the other factions all have their other touching points where he isn't all that needed to create connections and stuff but having this extra connection with the children of atom who are mostly feared by the rest of the commonwealth helps a LOT with keeping peace and all that, so it's beneficial for all parties involved because it also means that tiberius can just freely enter any of their outposts and he can rely on them if he needs them for anything :] the children of atom are a lot more willing to assist him with something that may be a bit shady than the minutemen or railroad would basically so it's a good backup to have LMAO

as for companions, tiberius is closest with preston 100% :] when he emerged from the vault, preston was the first person who talked to him and didn't treat him as a possible threat, and he helped him get settled in which tiberius will always be grateful for because he was so so scared. and preston made everything a little bit easier. he's very caring and patient and matches tiberius' funnyman energy surprisingly well when they're joking around, which would all remind tiberius a lot of his sister stella. preston Would in fact be like a brother to him :]

he enjoys hanging out with piper and nick, but only sparingly so since those two just love to investigate stuff and a lot of their time hanging out ends up turning into business of some sort and tiberius does NOT have the detective's spirit! he likes being clueless. he does not always need to know everything. he does like tagging along but sometimes he just wants to SIT and have a beer or something

which, naturally so, makes hancock better company for him. tiberius did a couple of gigs for him personally (and got to know him much more intimately during a wild night with both him and magnus but we don't talk about that) and he likes to stop by goodneighbor regularly for a drink and to talk about shit that's been going on lately. since magnus and hancock are together, magnus is there a lot as well but tiberius sees him a lot more regularly at the railroad too :]

that being said, the railroad is definitely tiberius' main hub for hanging out with people he loves the gang SO much. his best friends there would be nikolai, glory (she's alive yes obviously), deacon, and tinker tom :] and also max but tiberius sees her a LOT more at the castle since that's by the end of the in-game events also a place he can be found at a lot. he doesn't take a lot of minutemen jobs but he does help out on location with whatever they need, plus the castle is a huge and busy marketplace which would be super fun to visit (especially at night) so he just likes hanging out there in general! that's also where he hangs out with cait and roxy (max' wife) whenever he gets the opportunity

tiberius' relationship with x6-88 is. strained. on a surface level he likes the guy, but his loyalty to the institute definitely gets in the way of their friendship a lot at first. i haven't entirely figured out yet how to like, get x6-88 on tiberius' side in a satisfying way that doesn't feel out of character for him?? but that's basically what i'm aiming for, because the two DO spend a lot of time together away from the institute itself which would give tiberius a lot of opportunities to show x6 what the commonwealth is really like. and what the institute's reputation is and all that. and with x6 getting attached to tiberius during all of that he WILL be forced to pick a side at the end of it all. and i personally don't think he would side against tiberius after spending all that time building up an actual friendship for the first time in his life

surprisingly enough, tiberius and maccready did NOT!!! get along well at first AT ALL. when tiberius was taking gigs in goodneighbor he was unbeknownst to him stealing away a lot of mac's clientele so naturally mac has very one-sided beef with him. especially because both of them are like. babies. i can't remember maccready's exact age but that's a baby. and tiberius is one too. and they're both competitive and kinda stupid so when they first "officially" meet there's this insane tension between the two of them and every conversation they have is just a pissing contest. they've been kicked out of goodneighbor together on at least one occasion because of their near screaming competitions

(at some point after the battle of bunker hill and tiberius has temporarily broken ties with the institute because shaun's attitude pissed him the fuck off he goes to goodneighbor with his friends and after a drink or two too many he agrees to a bet maccready makes with him about killing elder maxson. tiberius succeeds by knocking out a brotherhood pilot and pretending to be the pilot instead, sort of successfully flying a vertibird up to the prydwen, somehow knocking out a guy in full power armor to then steal said guy's power armor, killing elder maxson (who by then has committed enough war crimes including but not limited to laughing max in the face when she tried to talk to him about a possible collaboration in hopes to keep the peace in the commonwealth) with a pipe pistol, and then jumping down(!!!!!!!!!) in the power armor to make his escape by walking over the bottom of the ocean on the shoreline in the power armor. he brought the guy's coat and dogtags with him as proof. maccready was turned on and angry about it)

but after traveling together for a while, tiberius and maccready learn they have a lot more in common than they initially thought and they grow closer over time :] i adjusted mac's story as well by making lucy his older sister rather than his wife (HE'S A BABY. HE DOESN'T NEED A WIFE AND A CHILD IN THIS ECONOMY) and duncan his nephew, so it's still a direct parallel to tiberius' story except lucy is still alive but missing, whereas stella is in fact very much dead. at first it makes tiberius feel frustrated and upset in a very selfish way, but it helps him with like, allowing himself to grieve for the first time since he exited the vault which by then is a LONG time ago, and then it also helps him with moving on from it rather than staying stuck in the past. helping mac with curing duncan and finding lucy helps the both of them and after all that they end up getting together :]

SO YEAH. very bumpy road for tiberius all in all and he makes connections in a bunch of different places, but he's always just a gear in the machine rather than the one operating the machine if that makes sense :] he feels a lot more at ease when he can actually make a difference at his own pace rather than having everyone look up to him constantly, the closest he got to that was when he was the one to infiltrate the institute and he has NEVER been that stressed before in his life. he makes it out alive and relatively unharmed but good lord. he's never doing that shit ever again

[gmariam19]

Here's the first part of my Jedi thing. That's what it's called right now. The last one was the Shouty Fic, this is the Jedi Thing. Pretty sure I'm not the only one with super creative working titles, right? ;-)

Anyway, I like most of it, though I still need to tweak a few things (coughpoecough) and figure out how it ends. Finn has a nice talk with Rey . . . and then what?! He hasn't told me yet, so hopefully it's a happy ending. Until then, here is the opening - enjoy!

The Falcon is fast approaching Ajan Kloss, and Finn could not be more nervous, more relieved, and more excited to be returning. They have been gone for almost six months, but it feels like far longer. Six months of traveling, of training, of missing the one planet he'd actually started to call home. Six long months of missing his friends—Rose and Kin and Jannah, even BB-8. But especially Poe.

It is Poe he wants to see more than anyone, that he needs to see. To touch, to hear, to simply be with. Finn knew when he left that he was going to miss Poe, but he hadn’t been prepared for how much. He hadn’t expected the lonely ache, barely relieved by their occasional holo-calls. And he hadn’t expected the rush of feelings every time they did talk, sometimes for hours in the middle of the night. It took him several months, but he’d finally come to realize and accept those feelings. He loves learning about the Force and has every intention of continuing his studies, but he loves Poe even more. Going away had shown Finn how much he wants to be with Poe, not traveling across the galaxy chasing Jedi lore.

Rey sets the Falcon down in a nearby clearing, and Rose is there to meet them, her smile wide as she hugs them all close. Finn is disappointed to learn that Poe is in a meeting with several new Senate representatives, but he understands. Poe has been leading the Resistance—what remains and has been repurposed—all on his own since Finn left. Which is also something Finn missed, being a part of something so much bigger than him. Right now, he and Rey are the only ones learning about the Force. Rey hopes to find others, but Finn wants to stay on Ajan Kloss, to strike his own path with the Force while returning to the Resistance.

Instead of waiting impatiently, Finn visits with Rose and several others in the new building that had gone up not long after he’d left. It’s a basic pre-fab, not nearly as much as they need, but better than the cave they had started in, and Finn is glad that Poe and the others finally have a real base of operations. He wonders what it will be like, to return now and stay; he’s been living off a ship with Rey for so long he hardly remembers what living planetside with other people feels like anymore. He’s looking forward to it.

After a quick tour, including the quarters that had been set aside for him, Finn heads back to the Falcon to get his things. He hears a shout behind him and turns to see Poe striding across the large clearing. They both speed up until they crash together in a warm embrace. Finn is struck hard by the memory of their first reunion, back on D’Qar after the firefight on Takodana. There is the same feeling of relief, only now he is relieved to be home. And it is wrapped with all the other feelings he has developed for Poe since the fateful day they met.

“Welcome back, buddy!” Poe murmurs into his neck, before stepping back and holding him at arm’s length. “Stars, it’s good to see you! You look…” He shakes his head, his eyes warm and full of wonder. “You look like a real Jedi.”

Finn rolls his eyes. “It’s only been a few months, Poe. I’m not ready yet.”

Poe runs a hand down the long robe Finn is wearing, smiles softly. “It’s been six months. And you could’ve fooled me. You look amazing.” Poe pulls him into another embrace. ”Kriff, I missed you. Almost didn’t think you’d come back.”

Finn feels his world shift. Poe missed him too. But Poe didn’t think he’d come back. Which makes Finn even more determined to stay. He pulls back and grins at Poe.

“Good thing I’m staying, then,” he says, and Poe’s eyes go wide.

Just like that, Finn can’t wait any longer, can’t hold back. He’d thought about what he would say, what he would do, when he saw Poe again, except he’s now forgotten it all. His nerves, his instincts, his heart—something takes over, and he wraps his hand around the back of Poe's head to pull him into a deep kiss. He closes his eyes and hopes he's not wrong about this, that he’s not making the biggest mistake of his life. They’ve been dancing around it since before he left, and he’s ready to finally move forward, together.

Poe kisses him back, really kisses him, and Finn feels his heart rejoice, that this is finally happening after wanting it for so long. It is perfect, the feel of Poe pressing against him and wrapping his arms around Finn's waist. This is what was missing from his life over the last six months, the love he feels and pours into his kiss, so that Poe feels it too, and knows that Finn has come back to stay.

There are scattered whoops and cheers from around the clearing, which would be embarrassing if Finn cared about anything but their kiss at that moment. But too soon Poe breaks away, slowly and reluctantly, eyes wide as surprise and confusion vibrates through the Force; something is wrong.

"Poe?" he asks as Poe takes another step backward, his face confused as he touches his lips. "What's wrong? Did I…because I thought…or I hoped…" He can't even frame the words, the sudden fear in his chest threatening to choke him.

"Finn," Poe says, shaking his head. He glances around, notices more than a few people are still watching with big grins and even another smattering of applause. He grabs Finn’s hand and pulls him behind the Falcon. Finn watches warily, a sick feeling settling in the pit of his stomach as Poe starts pacing, then stops and stares at him. "What’s going on? What was that?”

"What was that?" Finn repeats. "It was me, finally telling you how I feel. I’ve known for months, and I couldn’t wait to tell you any longer."

"You've been gone for six months!" Poe exclaims. "I didn't think you felt that way before you left. And you were gone so long, I didn't think it would ever happen now that…" He trails off, his face falling.

"Now that what?" Finn asks. "Now that I'm back? Poe, I missed you so much. I couldn't stop thinking about it.” He swallows his fear. “About this—about us.”

Poe still looks uncertain, almost gutted, which both confuses Finn and is starting to make him scared and even angry. Does Poe not feel the same? Was Finn—and Rey and Rose and every other person who has asked about him and Poe over the last year, teased him and encouraged him—were they all wrong? Has he ruined everything, particularly their friendship? Because it would break his heart all over again if he did.

"What about Rey?" Poe asks. "What about the Force?"

Finn throws his hands up in the air, frustrated. Why is either one an issue? He's tired of Rey coming between them, had thought Poe was over his misunderstanding and supported Finn training wholeheartedly. Could he have been wrong?

"Dammit, Poe, why do you always bring her into this? It's not an issue. I told you there's nothing between us. There never has been, there never will be, and I wish you would—"

"No, your training," Poe interrupts. "Finn, you're going to be a Jedi—a strong, amazing Jedi! This—" he gestures between them "—is nothing compared to that."

"What?" Finn exclaims. "Are you serious? You're telling me after that kiss, that this is nothing? That you didn't feel anything? That after all we've been through, I was wrong to think you did?"

"Of course not!" Poe pulls at his hair, turning in a frustrated circle. "Finn, I—" He steps forward, takes Finn’s face between his hands kisses him again, and Finn knows that yes, Poe feels the same way he does. But he can also sense uncertainty. Sadness and fear. What he doesn't understand is why. Poe stops the kiss, rests his forehead against Finn's, and he can see the brightness in the other man's eyes.

"Finn, I have loved you for so long," Poe tells him, his voice cracking before he takes a breath. "But I gave up hope months ago, when you left to train. I didn't think you felt the same, and now…” He sighs, but Finn doesn’t understand.

"Now what?" Finn asks. "I feel the same way! So what’s wrong? Are you…are you with someone? Someone else?” Finn steps back, suddenly cold. The thought hadn’t even occurred to him before that moment. He’d simply assumed Poe would always be there, that they would have their chance to be together someday. But maybe Poe has moved on.

Poe smiles sadly. “As if I could ever forget about you. Of course there’s no one else. But you…Finn, you’re almost a Jedi. Everything is different now.”

Finn still doesn’t understand, tries to imagine what might be different. He’d once been worried that his Force sensitivity would come between them, though Poe had seemed to accept it at the time. Maybe that’s what changed. “You're not afraid of me now, are you? I'm still me, I can just…you know, float a few rocks." He doesn’t mention the lightsaber he is working on, or how hard it’s been to meditate with his crystal because all he can think about is Poe.

"I could never be scared of you," Poe tells him, his voice strong and sure. "But Jedi don’t…Finn, does Rey know you're here? With me?"

"Of course she does," Finn says, irritated again. "And leave her out of this. This is between me and you." "Are you leaving your training, then?" Poe asks, shaking his head and looking upset. "Because you can't do that, you are supposed to be a Jedi! You can't stop because of me."

"I wasn't planning on stopping," Finn insists, still confused. "Poe, what's going on? I don't understand."

"Finn, Jedi…the old Jedi weren't supposed to have relationships," he says. "To get married, to have a family. It was part of their training, the old Jedi code." He frowns, because Finn is shocked, and it must show on his face. "I thought you knew that. Don't you know that?"

"I didn't," Finn whispers. "But why? I don't understand. How could anyone forbid something like love?" "I don’t know," Poe says. "Maybe it’s too distracting, or they felt it would complicate things. They took an oath."

Finn stares at him. "How do you know that? How do I not know that?"

"My grandfather used to tell me stories," Poe tells him. Finn can tell from the look on Poe’s face that the memories are strong, important to Poe. "And they were amazing stories, Finn. The Jedi…they were so strong, and compassionate, and wise, and they protected the galaxy for centuries. You have a chance to be a part of that, to bring the Jedi back!”

“But Leia…Leia was a Jedi, she trained Rey!” Finn protests. “And she was married, she…” He trails off as Poe shakes his head.

“Leia never completed her training,” he tells Finn. “She said her path was different than her brother’s.”

"I can't believe Rey didn't say anything," Finn whispers, his heart breaking within him. "All this time, she must have known."

Poe steps closer, takes his hand. "I'm sorry," he says, his voice cracking. "Maybe she doesn’t know. But I can’t take this away from you. Finn, you are all I've ever wanted, but the galaxy needs the Jedi far more."

Finn pulls him forward and kisses him again, and Poe returns the kiss until Finn stops this time. "And you are all I want. But this isn't over, Poe. I'm not giving this up."

"I won't make you choose," Poe protests.

"You won't have to," Finn tells him. One more kiss, then he turns away. "Because I made my choice a long time ago."

He leaves Poe standing there, can feel the other man's surprise and confusion, but also his love. He practically runs from ship, determined to find Rey, to learn the truth about the Jedi code. And if Poe is right, then Finn knows how this will end, because he choose Poe long before he knew anything about the Force.

[multifandom-nerds-blog]

Thinking about Ducktales again. More theoratical analyzing. More ranting. More precisely about Ducktales humanity. (Less a biological take, more societal and historical)

I don't remember if there were any monkey or ape characters, but nevertheless evolution in the Ducktales world decided that, nope I don't like apes, it's gonna be primarily birds, ducks specifically who turn human

But it's not only birds, there also mammals, both carnivores (I think more of those?) and herbivores, yet again, birds are still the majority.

So whatever it was that caused the evolution, my take is that it's more birds simply cause "birds" were just already far more wide-spread around the globe due to their natural flying abilities pre evolution. And Ducks, cause, Idk, ducks are everywhere.

Anyways, the "animals" were probably evenly hit by evolution in general, but a lot of other species (lions, tigers, subspecies like pandas) in the wild were bound by territory. Ergo, due to more birds existing all over the globe, more humans in the modern age ended up being part of bird species cause they were more wide-spread in the beginning due to pre-evolution times. Also certain areas having more dangers (stone age, bronce age, I'm not sure how the early ages are called) for humans then others being a reason why some species exist more than others. (Again, human lions or tigers might have not been able to build bigger civilizations in early history due to having animal lions or tigers as dangers) (I know lions and tigers do not live in the same are btw, even if it might sound like that)

Now... Birds are basically the top of society in the Ducktales universe. They are more. They are everywhere. They are much more dominant. And I have thoughts about discrimination and the irony of birds that are "prey" being the majority of Ducktales humanity, but I should not only make a separate post for this, but also really sort my words so this doesn't end up sounding to weird.

Going back to the society: It somehow happened that human animals and animal animals live together. And in a way mostly similar to us. Pets exist. Feeding ducks with bred crumbs is a thing (that scene is why I'm writing this post). And people eat cheese, milk, eggs and meat.

Now, I don't know which is weirder. A human dog having another animal dog as a pet (hello Goofy) or a chicken eating chicken soup? (Huey wanted to give Scrooge chicken soup while Gyro was sitting on his computer and he didn't react. I guess cocked/baked duck/geese/turkey is also being eaten) Does it not count as cannibalism if it's not a conscious human, or do chickens just not eat chicken, pigs no ham and so on?

I am very much aware that this is just a disney show, targeted to kids mostly, and that those characters are all animals because they've always been animals. But I'm going between things like Zoomania and Beastars where the whole humanised animals topic is actually being discussed and also used to cover racsim as a topic, to things like Sing and Kung Fu panda where everyone just simply is an animal cause it's animation marketed to kids. Then we have Ducktales. And well, Bigotry, discrimination and racism isn't the topic of this show, obviously. It's about adventures and familiar relationships and drama. WHICH IS GREAT. No question. But then you have Penumbra being weirded out at conscious ducks feeding non-conscious ducks, and the whole 4th wall break episode in season 3 showing us that at least some people were very much aware of the undiscussed implications a show with only animal people has. Even if it's supposed to be a silly kids show.

Feel free to comment under this and reblog, cause I would really wanna know what others people thoughts about this are and maybe discuss it a little bit.

[balanchine-ballet-master]

At City Ballet, a Once-in-a-Generation Dancer Arrives

Mira Nadon, the rising New York City Ballet principal, is coming off her best season yet. And it’s only the beginning. By Gia Kourlas The New York Times May 29, 2024

Mira Nadon was 5 when she took her first ballet class. It was pre-ballet, which meant running around the studio, maybe getting a shot at fluttering like a butterfly. This was not for her.

When she found out that students began proper training at 6, Nadon laid it on the line: “I told my mom, ‘This isn’t serious,’” she said. “‘I’m just going to wait till I’m 6.’”

Even then Nadon was levelheaded and unflappable. Now, at just 23, she is a principal dancer with New York City Ballet, approaching the close of a momentous season at Lincoln Center, where her versatility, artistry and jaw-dropping abandon have made her seem like a ballerina superhero. This week, she returns to the role of Helena, the rejected young woman determined to win her lover back in George Balanchine’s “A Midsummer Night’s Dream.” An affinity for drama is in her bones, but something else makes Nadon a rarity: humor.

Nadon, the first Asian American female principal dancer at City Ballet, is a special, once-in-a-generation kind of dancer. Nadon can flip among many sides of herself—secretive, seductive, funny, serene. And she lives on the edge, with rapid shifts from romantic elegance to ferocious force. A principal since 2023, Nadon still has raw moments, but so much is starting to click: Her feet are more precise, her partnering more secure.

This photo and the one at the top: Sabrina Santiago for The New York Times

“To watch her grow — and it’s not been very long—has been tremendous,” Wendy Whelan, the company’s associate artistic director, said. “It’s fast and big and just blossoming.”

This spring season, the close of the company’s 75th anniversary year, has been largely dedicated to newer ballets. She has danced in works by living choreographers, including Alexei Ratmansky and Pam Tanowitz, and made debuts in works by George Balanchine and Jerome Robbins. “The range has been astounding,” Whelan said. “She’s been able to hone in on the uniqueness of each of those voices. And she cares about what the intent is of each of those voices, so they’re not all the same. She doesn’t just go out and do great things. She actually carves out the idea.”

The most important debut was in “Errante” (1975), a Balanchine ballet originally called “Tzigane” after its score by Maurice Ravel. Suzanne Farrell, for whom the ballet was made, staged it and coached Nadon. “She’s such an intelligent woman and so dry and funny in the best way in the studio,” Nadon said. “She’s very, very demanding. She’s not just going to say ‘good job’ because you tried and you’re working hard. But I love that.”

The ballet opens with a five-minute solo for Nadon, whose smoldering use of her eyes and face, along with the smooth control of her body, showed a deep command of the stage as she wound her way along its mysterious violin solo. Farrell told her that the solo was a lonely experience. “I think she was excited for me to feel that onstage with the violinist,” Nadon said. Toward the end of the rehearsal process, Farrell told her that she shouldn’t move in a modern way but in a “very stylized older way,” Nadon said. “I think that’s also what makes it such a special world, that it’s unique and different from the way you approach another ballet.”

Above: Nadon in Errante. Photo: Erin Baiano via the NY Times

In Ratmansky’s “Pictures at an Exhibition,” Nadon was electric, fleshing out shapes while stretching bigger, deeper, longer—her arms are as fluid and expressive as her legs. And Nadon, at 5 foot 8 inches, has legs. Working with Ratmansky, who is City Ballet’s artist in residence, is sharpening her technique, she said, just as Tiler Peck did last season when Nadon danced in her ballet, “Concerto for Two Pianos.”

“He’s so funny," Nadon said of Ratmansky’s polite requests. “He’ll be like, ‘Do you think you could turn out the leg a little more?’ ‘Do you think you could hit fifth there?’ I’m like, ‘Yeah, I probably could.’”

This season, she performed in two of Tanowitz’s ballets: “Gustave Le Gray No. 1” and “Law of Mosaics,” which ends with Nadon dancing a solo barefoot. “She doesn’t dance at you, she draws the audience in, and that’s her power,” Tanowitz said. “It’s almost like she’s letting us in on this intimate part of herself.”

How many dancers can be understated and wild? It has much to do with how utterly at ease Nadon is onstage, which dates to her training at the Inland Pacific Ballet Academy in Montclair, Calif., where she had many opportunities to perform. “I think it was really beneficial growing up,” she said, “to not be scared onstage.” This was already apparent in 2017, when she danced the female lead in Balanchine’s “Scotch Symphony” at the School of American Ballet Workshop Performances, the annual year-end display of student talent. She was a fearless rush of power and delicacy that left audience members in disbelief. Recalling it now, Nadon laughed. “I didn’t think about it too much,” she said, “and just did the show and then everyone liked it, and I was like, Oh, I guess you’ve never seen me perform.”

Photo: Sabrina Santiago for The New York Times

Next month, Nadon will make her debut in “Diamonds,” the final section of “Jewels,” set to Tchaikovsky, at the Kennedy Center. “There’s something about the Tchaikovsky—the swells and the grandeur that you just feel in your soul,” she said. “I’m excited to live in that world and see how it feels.”

The part was made for Farrell, and dancing it speaks to Nadon’s future as an integral part of City Ballet. But getting to this point was far from a sure thing. Her father is a professor of government and her mother was a lawyer; neither knew much about ballet aside from the dramatic, dark side that is often shown in films.

When Nadon was accepted to the School of American Ballet, City Ballet’s training ground, she knew her parents weren’t going to want her to go, which would mean leaving home at a young age. She is grateful to Darci Kistler, a former City Ballet principal, who offered her a scholarship for the summer course and convinced her parents that it would be more than OK to let her go.

“Even getting my parents to agree to let me audition was a struggle,” Nadon said. “I was like, ‘I just want to see if I get in’ and they were like, ‘You’re not going to go, but you can audition just for yourself.’”

To Kistler, she said: “‘Oh—my parents aren’t going to let me, but thank you so much.’ And Darci said, ‘Can you go get your mom?’ I was, like, running through the hallways.”

It wasn’t a yes on the spot, but after some conversations, they agreed. “I’ll always be really grateful to her for putting in that extra effort,” Nadon said. “My parents still are, like, Thank God for Darci.”

Nadon’s path through the City Ballet ranks has been swift. She joined the corps de ballet in November 2018 and was promoted to soloist in 2022. Just a year later, she was named principal. “There was a lot of thought that went into—when you start pushing, giving the opportunities—making sure she was ready,” Whelan said. “We don’t want any dancer to fail. We don’t want to just throw them out there and say, let’s see what happens.”

But Nadon was ready—for all of it. “When I think of myself having the title of principal dancer, it does seem kind of crazy and foreign, but on the day to day, I’m just dancing my ballets and going out onstage,” she said with a cheerful shrug. “I guess I’ve tried not to overthink it too much because I think it could be very heavy and a lot of pressure.”

Nadon is self-aware. Her temperament, she realizes, is a blessing. She gets nervous for shows, but she’s never anxious. And she’s there to dance. “My favorite part of the job is just going out onstage and seeing what happens,” she said. “It’s almost like I’m surprised by what my body does. I’m finding out what’s going to happen at the same time as the audience.”

[preromantics]

wip clearing 2: peter/tony post-nwh stripper!peter

continuing my 'this one isn't going to get written' clearing!

context: this really couldn't be done justice at less than like 20k words the way i had it outlined and i didn't have the attention span for that

under the cut: a mismash 1.4k of plot dump and a few more fleshed out bits. not really fic-like but dumping here anyway for the jist!

Peter needs easy cash and all the under the table jobs he’s been getting aren’t cutting it (pizza delivery, irregular odd jobs like helping people move) and he stumbles into being a stripper at a slighty-above-seedy club – the kind that pays him under the table because he just  keeps what he gets during dances but the kind that also has a pretty good bouncer out front, so the clientele isn’t the worst. 

Turns out everything the bite enhanced wasn’t just good for being a friendly neighborhood superhero: it makes him a pretty amazing stripper. He picks up the pole work like he did swinging from buildings; a little practice, a few face plants and awkward moments, and then it’s as easy as anything else. 

Just like in this new version of his life where no one knows him, he’s anonymous at the club. Just like Spider-Man, he also tends to attract a crowd.

(“Do a flip!” someone shouts one night, with Peter at the top of the pole, arched back and hanging on by one hand, every muscle taught and the lines of his body on display. And Peter smiles, beatific, and flips backwards off the pole, two rotations in the air before he’s landing at the edge of the stage. It’s a record night, his tight lamé briefs stuffed with cash sticking to his sweat-slick hips and the curve of his ass.)

It becomes easy. Patrolling in the early evening and sometimes after his shifts, glitter and smoke under his suit but the adrenaline of a good night keeping him awake and alert. The water-stained drop ceiling above Peter’s closet in his shitty apartment ends up stuffed with cash in ziploc bags.

It’s still easy, even, when the news breaks that Mr. Stark is back. The details aren’t public knowledge, and Peter longs to know how it happens, but what matters is something is now right in the world again – even if no one knows Peter, still, he feels lighter after hearing the news. 

He doesn’t seek out Mr. Stark, assuming he also has no recollection of Peter Parker, and if Peter keeps an eye out for a glint of red and gold while he’s patrolling, it’s just to see if Mr. Stark at least remembers Spider-Man. (He never sees the suit, so it doesn’t matter. In fact, even with Mr. Stark back, there are no reports on Iron Man at all anymore.)

Peter has settled into his new normal, over a year into his stripper gig, and now on stage at a much nicer, fancier club (that still agreed to keep him off payroll if he gave a bigger cut to the house). It’s a few months since Tony Stark rejoined the living, Peter’s passed his GED but hasn’t sent in any applications, the cash he’s been saving up growing each week and starting to weigh on him.

It’s early in the night, and no one notices when Peter slips into the dressing room ten minutes late to his shift. This club is less likely to hand waive lateness, Peter knows – a condition of his under the table employment here was showing up when scheduled and a bigger cut of tips to the house than the other dancers. 

The clientele, location, the drinks – basically everything is better than the first place Peter started stripping at last year, though, so the extra percentage at the end of the night and ability to hand waive the background check that would flag Peter as a ghost make it worth it. He’s really trying to not be late, to cut his pre-shift patrols off earlier so he doesn’t jeopardize his quote-un-quote employment. 

Some nights, though, the city just seems to want to hold on to Spider-Man from block to block.

Peter has his face close to the mirror, working with some green and yellow color correctors the way one of the girls at the old club taught him to hide the bruise blossoming on his lower jaw. By the end of the night it will be barely visible, anyway, between his healing factor and the way the club gets darker and the clientele gets tipsier, looking at Peter with glassy eyes. 

He’s almost done buffing everything out with concealer over the top and already reaching for a pot of subtle glitter from his backpack when one of the new girls (Amber, maybe? Peter keeps meaning to get better at the social part of this new place) bursts into the room with a high-pitched squeal.

“Tony Stark is here!” she says, her eyes wide. Peter meets them through the mirror, hands stilling. “Like, actually him. I saw him putting a black lacy mask on at the door.”

Peter’s first thought is that he should leave. He should definitely leave, fake a stomach bug or something. There are six of them in the small dressing room, all in various states of getting ready for the night ahead, but every person stops what they’re doing, and the room becomes so loud all at once that Peter stays frozen, now staring down his own reflection. 

It’s been three months since the PR whirlstorm that surrounded Mr. Stark’s resurrection. 

He’s with Rhody. Peter waivers on if he’ll cut out or stay. He ends up staying. It’s masquerade night. They hand out fancy masks at the door and the dancers have masks, so it feels a little more comfortable than it should, hiding behind a mask. He doesn’t think Tony knows who he is, anyway, since no one remembers Peter Parker – why would Mr. Stark be any different. He ends up doing a back room with a nice co-worker named Amber. It’s all above board at this club (for the most part) and the back rooms have their own pole, good lighting, and luxurious leather couches. “They requested a guy and a girl, and you’re our best guy, c’mon, Pete,” Amber says, with wide eyes that absolutely work. Peter suddenly understands why Amber gets the most private rooms. Peter loses himself to the backroom, to the touches, the music, seeing the crinkled eyes of his mentor up close again for the first time in years. 

Are you going to tell me why you’re working in a strip club yet, Peter Parker? Tony whispers at the end of the dance.

Peter bolts.

When he thinks about it, he’s not even sure anything about his life will change, at this point, if one person (Tonytonytony his brain says) remembers who he is – and after a (scheduled) day off it’s time for another shift. He’s wavering on showing up for his next shift, or risk losing his job (that he likes, thank you) but ultimately shows up.

Tony is there waiting – had he come the day before, too? Asked about Peter? Sat around just watching, waiting? Had he asked someone else for a dance? – and Peter bravely faces him.

They end up in a room, again, this time with the awareness that they know each other. 

“I honestly have no idea where to start, Mr. Stark.”

Tony raises an eyebrow at him. “I did pay for a private dance, so you could start with that as the warm up to the big reveal,” he says, and Peter feels his mouth part in shock. 

The timing is perfect: the queued up song starts before Peter can say anything, a bass-heavy track with no lyrics, and Peter does an instinctive spin on the pole while trying to sort out the mess in his head. 

“I was kidding,” Tony says, with a small amount of panic in his eyes. 

Peter stops his next spin, staggering against the pole. Right. That would make so much more sense. “Oh,” he says, dumbly. 

(They talk on the couch. Peter ends up spilling everything about what has happened. Tony grips him tight, petting the back of his hair in what Peter assumes is only meant to be comforting, but in a way that makes Peter too aware of the fact he’s wearing a thong and covered in glitter that’s now coating Tony’s immaculately tailored suit, too aware of how comforting this is anyway, how warm Tony is. He’s crying, and his hair is a little wet, so he thinks Tony might be, too.)

After a lot of miscommunication, the reestablishment of Peter Parker's identity, sans the public unmasking, and a professional amount of distance…

Peter kind of misses stripping. Not the money (which was good, but his reinstated trust fund from Tony's non-applicable will is better), but the physicality of it. The intimacy within the anonimity. The way it made his pulse beat harder and his body feel powerful in new ways.

Tony has a stripper pole on the private jet – the only aircraft from his old possessions that wasn't sold off. He and Peter are taking it somewhere and the pole is the elephant in the room.

So... Peter puts on a show. :)

[chronoxtreme]

The Cage - Chapter 18 Author's Notes

First of all, here's a link to the chapter in question! CW: Discussions of a relationship with power imbalance, discrimination based on sexual anatomy So, fun fact - everything with Yurgir was not in the original, second or even 4th draft of this fic (and when I mean draft, I basically mean "attempt to think this monster's details out," not an actual draft). Chapters 17 and 18 were supposed to be one chapter, but migraine + insane wordcount + me getting a new position at work basically nuked that idea. So I split it in two, and honestly, I believe it's for the better in terms of pacing.

Nanne's whole "I don't like to use charm-like magic" comes from seeing Da use it on other people. Friends was that guy's favorite cantrip, and while it can get you what you want, it can also burn you. Nanne's much less risk adverse than Da, so they avoid it. Enhance Ability though is fair game because it just makes you better at certain things.

The "homicidal hat trick" line by Gale is a shout-out to Mistborn, one of my favorite book trilogies.

And then we get to the second "twist" of Nanne's backstory: Maria. This is a part that wasn't in my first stab at writing Nanne. Originally, they had no experience with sex or romance at all. However, I realized that them having some romantic history gave them a lot better motivation for their behavior around Astarion pre-seduction. At the same time (and this was unintentional) their experience with Maria became a foil for Astarion's sexual encounters with patriars.

I also put a lot of myself into that story. I'm transmasc nonbinary, and when I wrote that scene, I wasn't out to anyone, including my husband. Thankfully, he's been extremely supportive of me and my identity, but it took a lot of courage to talk about it with him. It's extremely difficult to come out to people who have a certain expectation of who you are. Writing about Maria's rejection was a weird sort of catharsis.

It was also a story where I wanted it to be messy, especially from Nanne's POV and how they describe it. Nanne had zero intentions of having a relationship with their employer, it kind of just... happened. And while it was doomed to failure from the start, Maria was attracted to them. There was a "chance" of it working out. That's what makes it really sting, in my mind. It was problematic at best, coercive at worst, and Nanne wasn't in the wrong - but for so long, they've lived with an emotionally immature parent constantly talking about how difficult it was to raise them, the sacrifices, the burdens, etc. and that gets to you. So naturally, if something goes wrong, it is their fault. Finally, the song! This section ended up being a lot shorter than I expected it to be, but honestly, that's another thing that I've been working on in the "this is for me first" category: not being afraid to release chapters with wildly differing lengths. Yes, it will happen again, that is a promise lmao.

Like the Dawn is one of my favorite songs on the planet, and when I listened to it after playing BG3, I realized that it perfectly described Nanne's thoughts about Astarion in the sunlight, and the rest was history. This is a moment that I could rewrite a thousand different ways and still never be satisfied because how in the world do you write about a person SINGING without it coming off awkward as hell? In the end, I think it worked out okay. I'm not satisfied, but I'm content.

Nanne's using Faerie Fire here, because if bards can use singing to do magic, why not do magic to enhance the singing performance? I've always loved fic/media that's used the world's magic system for stuff like special effects in performances and plays - it makes the world feel alive and Nanne is a bard first and foremost. The bigger the spectacle, the more coin they get. Is there a bit of illusion magic thrown in? Maybe. Hey those Weave lessons with Gale paid off!

Astarion running off was also not in the script but it turned out that way. I don't think it's a bad thing for him to keep feeling guilt. I do worry that it comes off as repetitive and cyclical, but in my experience that's how guilt works in real life. You feel good, you forget about it, and then someone says or does something, and it all comes crashing down. It's tough... and next chapter's gonna be even worse lmao.

[myndless88]

Since I didn't get any asks on this one, I've decided to just go ahead and do it for HideKane (since that's the ship I've been mainly doing these for). It's this ask specifically.

Who is the fussy eater: I feel like Hide wouldn't be one to be eating the things he should. Thus, Kaneki has to somehow sneak the healthy stuff into Hide's meals. Also, Kaneki has no choice but to be a fussy eater now that he's a half-ghoul.

Who is most likely to punch the other person’s sibling: Neither have siblings. But if we were to say relatives, Hide probably has thought about punching Kaneki's aunt.

Who wants to go to Disneyland: Most of the time, it's Hide. He especially likes going during the bigger events like Halloween and Christmas. And they take family trips when their triplets are born! :D

Who hates public transport: Kaneki. I feel he didn't really like being cramped in a packed train pre-ghoulification and especially not post-ghoulification .

Who gets arrested: Technically, Kaneki has been arrested in canon.

Who is great with kids: Hide. He puts on great sock puppet shows.

Who ends up covered in glitter as a prank: Kaneki. He got a gift from Hide once for his birthday. Being none the wiser, he opened it and suddenly became a sparkly half-ghoul. He still finds glitter in his hair several months later.

Who has a weird coffee order: Hide. Not so much weird as it is super sweet though.

Who gets up before 6am to exercise: Kaneki. Before he became a half-ghoul, he would've been dead to the world before (and maybe even after) 6am. But after becoming a half-ghoul, Kaneki is not only exercising but also patrolling the neighborhood he and Hide live in after they get together. Kaneki sometimes tries to get Hide to join him, and sometimes it works. Hide rides his bike while Kaneki jogs beside him.

Who hogs the Netflix account: Hide. Kaneki doesn't really watch it anyway.

Who knows all the lyrics to super horrendous bubbly pop songs: Hide, but it's to make Kaneki smile. He'll even do the dance routine, too.

Who proposes: Again, Hide. On Kaneki's birthday. (I drew a pic of this happening)

Who does petty shit when they’re annoyed: Kaneki. One time they got into an argument and Hide technically won it. But Kaneki wouldn't accept it, so he used his kagune to hold Hide's favorite headphones hostage by holding them up in the air at a distance Hide couldn't reach.

Who would take on stupid ridiculous dares: Hide. Kaneki always has a few bandages on standby just in case.

Who can’t sing but always does anyway: Hide. It's mainly in the shower, but Kaneki's hearing is pretty sharp since becoming half-ghoul. He just smiles and keeps preparing dinner as he hears Hide singing off-key upstairs. Though he does admit Hide is getting better.

Who screams at someone in public for making bigoted comments: I don't think either would scream. But Hide could probably make that bigot's life a nightmare by using his connections to get them fired or something.

Who freaks out about spiders: I don't think either would freak out much--depending on the size of it. But Hide would be the one to be like: "Woah! Look at how HUGE that spider is!"

Well, I hope y'all enjoyed this. I have a couple more of these types of asks in my drafts, so I might as well do the rest of them for HideKane too.