#it makes me so frustrated people only ever talk about it these days to complain about the gameplay

[ikeuverse]

YOU HATE ME, UNIVERSE? — s.jaeyun

PAIRING: jake x fem!reader  GENRES: smut, fluff, slight angst, a pinch of humor WC: 9.4k+

WARNINGS: swearing, drinking, sexual tension for a while. jake is frustrated for the most part (poor thing, let's understand him here). unprotected sex, oral sex (f. receiving), holding the neck, but no hanging. cum inside (make it safe and cover it up), aftercare. lmk if i forgot anything.

SYNOPSIS: how much the universe could hate you and jake to conspire against you every time you two came close to kissing? it was driving him crazy, jake needed to do something about it.

NOTES: i honestly don't know how this idea came about, it just popped into my head and i let it flow. it was something so natural, so i just let it happen and here it is. i hope you like it!

masterlist

Anyone in their right mind could tell what was between you and Jaeyun whether it was the extremely palpable sexual tension or the mutual desire that coursed through both of you as you became closer and closer.

It was always like that. Ever since the day Sunghoon introduced the two of you as an excuse for his best friend to meet new people. Not in a sexual sense because he didn't want to interfere that much, but he also knew that Jaeyun needed to talk to someone other than him and Heeseung. The boy was completely lonely and it was driving him crazy.

The idea of you becoming someone to talk to, since you were the social butterfly of the group, fit like a glove. So well that Jaeyun quickly opened up to you and the two of you started chatting. But he was so much calmer than Sunghoon and Heeseung when approaching.

Jaeyun was subtle when he arrived, making eye contact first before greeting people. He would say hello to everyone until he sat beside you and brushed his hand against yours to get your attention. At first, it was innocent, you would even intertwine your fingers in his quickly as a response to the greeting, Jaeyun maintaining the grip for a while before being interrupted to greet other people.

What changed was that Sunghoon and Heeseung weren't like that with you. The two of them would come and hug you, and Heeseung would mess up your hair because he knew you'd complain, he liked to annoy you. But no one was able to hurt you because he would break up with anyone. Sunghoon treated you like a little sister, not least because he was dating your best friend and you were responsible for introducing the two of them. He was grateful for that, so he always took the best care of you, hugging you from the side and running to his friend.

Whereas Jaeyun never held anyone's hand during greetings. He didn't make a point of touching anyone other than you or his friends for a quick handshake. That sparked something in you… So this was something just for you and him? An intimate thing that you could call yours and Jaeyun's alone?

Not to be hasty or emotional, you never even asked him, not least because it might put him off or simply make him stop holding your hand. You remember the first day before you met him when Sunghoon told you how shy Jaeyun was around anyone. That's exactly why you approached him: so that he could meet and talk to more people.

But the touching of hands became the least of your problems when you and Jaeyun started to get more physical. He didn't mind holding your waist as he walked up to the bar of the nightclub where you two were with your friends, whispering in your ear whatever silly conversation you and he were having at the moment. You'd notice the way his eyes would leave any corner of the room to focus only on your lips, even if you weren't saying anything. Just listening to him and the words coming out of his mouth.

It was a game of cat and mouse where you and Jaeyun were cornering each other more and more until you couldn't take the pressure.

If you asked him what was going on, he wouldn't hesitate to say that he wanted you. He doesn't know when it started, whether it was the first look you gave him in the living room of Sunghoon's apartment or the warm and welcoming way you greeted him. But Jaeyun was charmed at that moment. He was truly enchanted by you.

Your beauty was unreal and he lost count of how many uncontrollable, low sighs came out of his lips every time you did the slightest thing.

Get a grip Jaeyun, she's Sunghoon's friend and she's being nice to you. He was trying to convince himself of this because a shy university student who didn't have many friends would never win over a woman like you. Outspoken, self-assured, smiling and so beautiful. Not to mention every curve of your body that he swore he wouldn't pay attention to, but it became more and more impossible as he spent more time with the guys and with you.

Jaeyun was terrible at hiding the fact that he was staring, sometimes with Heeseung's help with a gentle push. A push or a hold because you could tell. Not that Heeseung wanted to stop Jaeyun, he was a great supporter of the – almost – couple, but he also wanted to know if you were comfortable with the advances. So he just tried to make everything seem a little more normal.

“How about you get her a drink instead of staring?” Heeseung asked, leaning away from the dimly lit kitchen counter of the decadent party he and his friends had decided to go to that weekend. Jaeyun sighed, turning his back to you who was in another room, but in his view of the kitchen.

“Dude, that's not gonna happen” Jaeyun almost cried at the mention of hitting on you, knowing that he got nervous just by looking at you.

“Of course it will” meanwhile, Heeseung was filling two glasses with concoctions that the other didn't even pay attention to. He was in a dilemma between running out of that kitchen and not listening to Heeseung, or following his friend's advice and bringing you a drink “Now, take this and call her somewhere more private. Trust me.”

He wanted to trust, that's for sure. He wanted Heeseung to be right enough to drop those two glasses, run to you, and kiss you. Holding the plastic cups in his hand, with a little more confidence from his friend's encouraging smile, Jaeyun straightened up.

“Anything, I'll pretend nothing happened, that I was drunk and it's your fault” he said before leaving the kitchen, hearing his friend's laughter behind him before entering the busy, noisy room.

Without losing sight of you, even if his eyes weren't on you, he walked slowly towards you. You were talking to Allie, your best friend, and Sunghoon's girlfriend. Other girls were also around, but as he didn't know many people, just his best friend was enough for him to know that he was surrounded by trustworthy people.

At a moment when Allie decided to pay attention to some questions from another girl, you were speechless for a few seconds, looking around to stop your eyes automatically on Jaeyun. It was as if your body and brain were aware of his approach and where he was.

“Hey” you moved your lips, he knew what had been said just by reading your lips. And because he always looked at your mouth.

“Hey” he greeted back, coming close enough to you to offer the glass of drink. Your throat was screaming for something wet to wash away all the talk from before because when you got together with your friends, there wasn't a minute when you were quiet.

“How did you guess I needed it?” you asked an amused tone in your voice making Jaeyun smile at you.

“Thought transmission?” he suggested, shrugging and sipping his drink.

“Uh girls, I think it's about time” Allie looked between you and Jaeyun, a small smile forming on her lips. You'd say you were innocent if it weren't for the double-entendre noises coming from your other friends.

At that moment you wanted to crawl under that filthy party mat and never leave. Or you wanted to be drunk enough to pretend that your cheeks weren't burning fiercely and that you had nowhere else to look but at him.

“I'm sorry, I—” you began, your voice breaking as there was only you and Jaeyun left in that corner.

“It's okay, I suffer a bit from that with the boys too” he said.

You bit your tongue to ask why, if it was for the same reason as yours since that could mean he had feelings for you too. But instead of asking, again, you let Jaeyun grab your hand as he always did and pull you to another corner of the party. No protest came from your lips as he left with you and went to the balcony of the busy house.

No one stayed there at that moment, even though it was dark and quiet. People seemed to want the movement and loud music, or the rooms stinking of sweat and sex from who knows how many people who had passed by. You and he preferred the calm of the wooden gang with their almost empty glasses of booze.

He sat down first, stretching his arm on the back of the bench while you sat down next to him and, without thinking, snuggled closer into his body.

“Can I…”

“Of course, you can” he didn't even need your continuation to know, you could be like that with him, even more so outside where the small gusts of wind were hitting you both. Jaeyun wanted to go back and get his coat to warm you up, but that would have meant leaving you alone, and that wasn't the plan. He wanted to follow what Heeseung had said in the letter and it was already a big step to have your head resting on his shoulder at that moment.

Not that it had never happened before, the two of you had been like this before. On the sofa in the boys' apartment, when you two went to the movies with Sunghoon and Allie, or during class breaks in the library when you shared a headset. It was so good to be close to him. The glow of the night added a finishing touch to what you and he needed.

The minutes of silence became a little longer, but at no point did you and Jaeyun feel like saying anything. He just listened to the sound of your breathing and, sometimes, your fingers touching his hand, which was resting on your shoulder. It was intimate and cozy, and he wished he could do more with it. The internal dilemma about raising one hand and touching you, pulling you close, and kissing you was screaming in the back of his mind.

What if he was such a coward? What if you thought he didn't like you or didn't feel anything, even if all the sexual tension was seen by anyone outside? It made him a little dazed, maybe even nervous, he could tell.

But Jaeyun hadn't counted on the fact that you could be a bit quicker, with more attitude. Or he could have waited since you were his opposite.

Raising your head enough to look at him, you noticed that Jaeyun was already looking in your direction. The dark, curious orbs shone a little more brightly than usual. The drinking glass had long since been emptied and placed next to the foot of the bench you were both sitting on. So you had your hands free to lift and hold his face between your hands. Jaeyun sighed at the tender touch of your fingertips, almost living a little dream as your thumbs slid across his cheeks. The tickle of tiny stubble ran down his smooth, well-drawn chin.

“Jake” you whispered, as a warning that he could stop you if he wanted to. But his response was the opposite, taking his free hand to your waist to pull you closer to him. The touch of Jaeyun's fingers reached the little bit of exposed skin between the waistband of your pants and the T-shirt you were wearing that night. He pressed his fingers there to know that you could go further, that he wanted to too.

Then slowly you leaned in. Jaeyun's other hand slid from your shoulder where his arm was resting to go to the back of your neck and hold your face closer, afraid that you would regret it and abandon him. He couldn't miss it.

When your breath hitched against his ajar mouth, his lips red and kissable, you saw him moisten them with the tip of his tongue before moving in too. The softness of Jaeyun's mouth brushed against yours before the bang of the door caused you and him to break apart in shock.

“What—” you turned towards the door, your eyes widening with the slight fear that invaded your body and Jaeyun's too.

“You two…” Heeseung stammered, his Adam's apple bobbing in a dry, regretful swallow. He looked between you and Jaeyun with wide eyes, his hand going back and forth from the bench to the inside of the house “I— I got in the way?”

“No” you said slowly.

“Yes, Heeseung” Jaeyun replied, abruptly getting up from the bench and walking over to him “What happened?”

“I'm sorry, I— Shit” Heeseung looked like he was going to cry at that moment, his eyes glazing over at the two of you as he watched you slowly get up behind Jaeyun “I just wanted help because Sunghoon's drunk and I thought I should look for you, but—” he stopped looking at his friend and his eyes went towards you “I can't believe I did that, what the fuck.”

“Hey bro, calm down” Jaeyun seemed a little less nervous, trying to understand that Heeseung really was worried about Sunghoon and wouldn't do that on purpose. You understood too, even though your heart was pounding frantically. Both from the fright and the near-kiss with Jaeyun.

“You can continue, I—”

“No, let's go after Hoon” Jaeyun held Heeseung by the shoulders, giving him a little squeeze before pushing his friend back into the house. You would have breathed a sigh of relief if he had gone in with Heeseung, but instead, he turned towards you.

Jaeyun's eyes stared at your face while you looked everywhere but at him. Come on, you were the one who had leaned in minutes before, so why be embarrassed when he was approaching you? His fingers found their way to your chin and you were forced to hold the man's gaze. A small, shy smile played on the lips you should have been kissing at that moment.

“Do you mind if—” Jaeyun asked.

“No, go help him, please” you knew that the three of them were inseparable, but you were sure to end Heeseung's life when he sobered up.

Jaeyun smiled a little wider, sliding his hand around the curve of your neck and pulling your face to his chest. His lips slowly kissed your forehead and sniffed your hair as if he needed to smell you before he pulled away.

He smiled once more, this time pulling away for real so that he could enter the house and help Heeseung with the task of taking his drunk friend home. While you felt your whole body tingle, even more so in the parts where Jaeyun had touched you, like an addictive drug you hadn't even tasted yet.

Anyone could live with being interrupted just once when they were about to kiss someone they liked. But Jaeyun already felt flames coming out of his ears because it had happened more than once. He couldn't count the number of times he'd tried to be alone with you, looking for more intimate contact with you beyond that party.

First, it was in the apartment he started sharing with Heeseung and Sunghoon. Movie night could always add Allie, you, and any girl Heeseung was interested in. Jaeyun felt lucky to be sitting next to you with his fingers tangled in yours. The small moment when he stared at you, like a silent request to go to the kitchen and make more popcorn with him. Even though the bucket on Allie's lap was practically full. It was just an excuse to sneak away and be alone with you. Slowly pin you against the counter and completely forget about the popcorn that neither of us wanted. His gaze would alternate between your lips and your eyes, the sliding nibble of Jaeyun's teeth against his lower lip to make him suppress a smile, driving you crazy without even realizing it.

He would lean towards you, his breath hot against your mouth again as your heart pounded in anticipation. Only for Heeseung's girl to arrive the next second looking for a glass of water. She was oblivious to everything the two of you were having but didn't fail to apologize for the interruption, listening to Jaeyun's masked response of affection as he pointed out to her where she could get the drink.

The second was at university, late at night, where Jaeyun always ended up staying to study a bit more on Tuesday nights. Calculus was the core of his course, but even so, it was a subject he liked to dedicate himself to, even if he found it easy. He always studied alone and had the company of the famous headphones or a few snacks to pass the time until he returned to the shared apartment, but that changed as soon as you started attending at the same time as him.

Your advanced literature lessons could be a good companion to his calculus classes, while the two of you shared snacks and exchanged furtive glances, Jaeyun could smile slowly every time your hand touched his as you went to pick up the package or simply sneak forward to get the water bottle. He didn't even bother to change seats so that he could sit next to her, get a little closer, and feel the warmth of your body in those last few minutes of studying. Finishing the task with the smell of your perfume in the air was the only thing that could calm him down at that moment.

“I'm almost done” Jaeyun whispered to you, looking in your direction, although your eyes were still on your reading material. He studied your whole calm and relaxed profile, only to almost swallow a sigh when you looked in his direction.

“There's no need to rush, I'll wait for you” you smiled so sweetly that he couldn't help himself. It was now or never, he would have to kiss you because there was no one else there to interrupt. After so long he could finally feel your lips.

Giving a fuck about any personal space rules or anything like that, Jaeyun wrapped his hands around your face and pulled you close to his. He no longer wanted to waste a second without feeling your lips and that's why the rush had to be in his favor now. If it wasn't for the damn librarian and that demon encyclopedia that fell on the floor.

“Fuck” Jaeyun wanted to shout at that moment, his hands still on your face as he felt his whole body tremble.

Your shy laughter only made everything seem worse because you were just as embarrassed as he was. There was no way this could be happening.

“The universe can only hate me, it's not possible” he finally said, moving away from you to collect the materials.

Those were the few times he clearly remembered that he didn't get to kiss you, although there could have been more, but Jaeyun simply wanted to erase them from his mind because he got stressed about that kind of thing.

He knew that it affected the mood of his friends and of everyone around him. It wasn't just you who was a social butterfly, but his best friends too. Living on the university campus with a bunch of talkative people at least gave Jaeyun more to talk about. But he wasn't in the mood. His head was spinning with the thought that the stupid universe was playing tricks on him and he'd never get to kiss you. He could even settle down to know that the attraction between the two of you would be nothing more than physical touches and the light brushing of lips – which was the closest you ever got to each other.

It took his sleep away in an inexplicable way, because how could this be happening? How could someone be capable of bringing him to the brink of collapse just because they'd never managed to kiss? It was humanly impossible, wasn't it?

“Jake” Sunghoon caught his eye, throwing the bath towel over his friend's head as he watched him entertain himself on his cell phone. However, Jaeyun's thoughts were far away from the device in his hands.

“Hm?” he asked, lifting his gaze to look at his friend just out of the shower. Sunghoon was already dressed from the waist down, for which Jaeyun was grateful, so he ran from one side of the room to the other in search of his shirt.

“Are you ready? I need to call Allie and Y/n, they're meeting us at the party” he sighed defeatedly. One more moment he'd be close to you and nothing would happen because there would always be something to get in the way.

“I'm already there, just waiting for you and Hee is having a snack” he muttered.

Sunghoon knew Jaeyun's obvious frustration and how he dealt with it all. He couldn't blame him, after all, if he had been in his friend's shoes, he would have lost his mind. But it turned out that Jaeyun was calm about it, otherwise he might well have locked you in a room at the university and kissed you right there. But everyone was talking about Sim Jaeyun, the calmest, quietest boy they knew. Even if he was collapsing with desire, he would never get past that point. Even if now, in addition to the desire, he felt anger and frustration that nothing had happened.

“Then go get something to eat too, I don't want to see you looking ugly all night” he joked, knowing that Jaeyun's countenance wasn't due to hunger.

With no room for discussion or any jokes, he just headed out of Sunghoon's room and into the kitchen. His steps were slow, contemplating what would become of his and his friends' evening together, yet another university party where he knew he'd be bumping into you all night and being interrupted at every turn. It was frustrating to unravel the evening when it hadn't even happened yet.

“Peanut butter and jelly or just a slice of cheese?” Heeseung greeted Jaeyun as soon as he entered. The sandwich ingredients were spread out in front of him on the counter, making the newcomer's smile widen a little. Heeseung was funny without even trying.

“Peanut butter and jelly sounds good” he said.

“And we can hold our drink for longer” added the other, preparing a sandwich for Jaeyun while keeping his eyes on each slice “You know, man, I think you should bring Y/n to the apartment today.”

“What? What do you mean?” he couldn't take his eyes off Heeseung's movements, the swipe of the knife with jam on the bread, the mixing of the peanut butter until he closed the bread and handed it to his friend. It was all so fast, but Jaeyun focused on each movement just so he wouldn't have to deal with a pair of curious eyes staring at him.

“We can see your anger smoking from afar, Jake” he laughed a little, “Get to the party, find her, and bring her here. So you two can be alone.”

Determined to take a bite of bread and get it over with, he didn't want Heeseung to be so sure of his thoughts. But it turned out that Jaeyun had also been avoiding you for a few weeks because he knew he'd get frustrated every time he got close to you and it came to nothing.

“I'd better let it go” he chewed a little, wiping the corner of his lips with his fingertips when a bit of jam almost got on his cheek “I don't think that's going to happen. I have to accept that and that the universe must hate me so much.”

“Come on, bro, stop being an idiot” Heeseung wanted to throw a slice of bread at him, but he knew he'd be scolded by Sunghoon as soon as he saw it. So he settled for taking a deep breath and biting into the bread he had made for him a while before Jaeyun arrived “You and her just need a space where there won't be anyone, and our apartment will be empty.

“But someone will come” he finished his snack in a few bites, surprising himself with how much he needed it. Searching for a paper napkin, he finished cleaning up the small mess before looking at Heeseung “Some neighbor is going to knock, the cell phone of one of us is going to ring… Anything” he huffed, irritated “It feels like I'm living in the worst romantic comedy of my life.”

“That's why you have the two best friends in the world to help you with this” Sunghoon appeared, stealing the piece of bread Heeseung was about to eat. Avoiding any protests as he made his way to the other side of the kitchen counter.

“And how, exactly, would you two do that?” Jaeyun asked “Heeseung has already gotten in my way once.”

“And I blame myself every day for it, I really do.”

“He almost cries just remembering it” Sunghoon laughed out loud, being joined by Jaeyun in that little implication with the older man “But Hee's right, you two need to come here. It's making even me and him angry.”

Seeing his best friends share that feeling would have been comical, if it hadn't been so tragic for him. Everyone knows the internal drama Jaeyun was going through just for not kissing someone he wanted to. He didn't want to get his hopes up because he knew how the universe wrote things for him and you, so he just shrugged and nodded in agreement.

“Great, then let's go” Sunghoon grabbed Jaeyun by the shoulders, pushing him out of the kitchen.

“Just don't use the armchair in the living room, please. I love snoozing in it” Heeseung whined one last time before turning off the lights in the apartment, bidding a small farewell to the sacred place Jaeyun could take you at the end of the party.

The familiar scene made Jaeyun's body tremble in anticipation. Parties weren't a big deal, but at least he could have some fun and talk to some people before he had to take you out of there. It was his only goal after Sunghoon and Heeseung had convinced him to take you out of that party. He just didn't know how to approach you, since he had been avoiding you for a while.

There would be no need to avoid you if he thought that exchanging a few words was enough since the last time you two were interrupted. But there was no way to think straight and he knew his feelings were confusing, fighting them wasn't working, so the only thought was to keep quiet.

Jaeyun didn't know what it was like to touch your hand or feel you so close for a few weeks. He skipped a few study sessions and even pretended to be tired the times you went to his and the boys' apartment with Allie. A goodnight wave was the only thing you received, not counting the unread messages and some with apologies: I'm busy today, can we talk later? He was a complete jerk, for sure. Now, besides fate denying all of this, you could have lost interest in him just because Jaeyun couldn't deal with his own feelings.

He tried not to focus on that, after all, the party was going on and he just needed to find you. He only needed a few seconds to talk to you and get you out of there, so that was the mission as soon as Sunghoon received the call from Allie, that the two of you had arrived at the party.

It's now or never. He thought. His hands were in his jeans pocket trying to camouflage his nervousness while he had Heeseung and Sunghoon by his side, waiting for the two of you to arrive, which didn't take long. Just like every party, Allie quickly found Sunghoon, consequently finding his friends too.

Jaeyun's eyes quickly found yours, without even needing to know where you were looking because, to his surprise or not, you were already looking at him. Your smile wavered a little, not knowing if he would ignore you again or treat you coldly like he had been doing for the past few weeks, and Jaeyun felt that as you approached Allie. Your eyes wavered, although they didn't leave his for a minute until you were finally close.

“Hey, we found you all” Allie smiled, hugging each one until stopping at Sunghoon, where she remained in her boyfriend's arms.

“We were waiting for you two” Heeseung sang, hugging you and then standing next to the newly embraced couple “How about we get a drink?”

“I think that's a great idea” Sunghoon sang, pulling Allie with him and hearing Heeseung's footsteps right behind.

Your eyebrows narrowed, your gaze confused because neither of the other two spoke much to you and only led Allie away. Not even she had talked that much to Jaeyun in the short seconds that the two of you had appeared. Your gaze followed where the three had disappeared and that made you even more curious, they didn't even bother to call the two of you.

Was this something between them or were your friends wanting to give you and Jaeyun some privacy? You didn't know and it made you apprehensive because after some time you were alone with him with no one around – besides the strangers from the party – so looking in his direction again was different this time.

“Do you—” your voice broke a little, nervous for the first time in Jaeyun's presence “Do you want to accompany them? They're going to drink and we—”

“No” he interrupted you quickly, praying to the heavens that he hadn't sounded rude in his tone or he wouldn't know what to do next. You just raised your eyebrows, surprised by the way he spoke to you. Jaeyun's tone had been nothing compared to his actions as he walked the few steps that separated the two of you, extending his hand to you. The small touch in your hands finally returns little by little. He slid his fingers between yours as calmly as he had ever done since the first time. You smiled involuntarily at that, your heart skipping a beat when Jaeyun's eyes landed on yours. “Let's get out of here.”

“What?” you asked. “Jake, we—”

“Please? Come with me.”

You knew a little about Jaeyun’s vulnerability. The sweet protests he made when there was an argument between his friends, or when he pouted because he couldn’t understand something about college. Even the way he messed up his hair when he was nervous was adorable. But you never thought that seeing him say please with those eyes would make you give in to anything for him.

Your nod was all he needed to grab your hand even tighter and walk to the kitchen door quickly. His friends were still busy preparing drinks without realizing that Jaeyun was standing there.

“Hey, idiots” he shouted enough to get Heeseung and Sunghoon’s attention. Allie smiled when she saw you behind him. “Don’t knock on my room door, or I swear to God I’ll kill you the second that happens.”

It was a short warning, but understanding enough to know that he had finally gathered the courage. Heeseung held back a scream when he saw you holding hands with Jaeyun, waving your free hand without really knowing what was happening, but praying that whatever he had thought of, could happen.

“What does Jake mean by that?” Allie asked as soon as you and him were out of sight, now looking at her boyfriend.

“We left the apartment for him and Y/n tonight” he said. “This kiss needs to happen.”

She laughed at the idea, not being able to believe that this was happening. This almost task force just to make a kiss happen. But she was happy that it would finally be fixed, because neither the boys nor her, could stand to see you and Jaeyun almost falling over because of this.

Arriving at the shared apartment had never been so torturous for him, even more so with you by his side and in silence the entire way back. Jaeyun knew you had countless questions about what was happening, perhaps focused on an explanation as to why he hadn't spoken to you so much in the last few weeks. But the truth behind taking you to his and his friends' apartment was now even more explainable. He wanted to look into your eyes, without interruptions, and be able to tell you that he couldn't stand another second without having to kiss you.

The same silence that stretched in the car was followed by the walk to the lobby of the building, the elevator, and, finally, the apartment where Jaeyun unlocked the door and let you enter first. Quiet and silent, dark and with the wind blowing against the window. That was how the environment was if none of the three boys were inside.

Turning to you after he locked the door, Jaeyun sighed slowly.

“Can we go to my room?” it was almost begged at his request, his voice wanting to scream, but it was as restrained as the desire he had to grab you right there. You just agreed, without protesting at all to his requests since you found him at the party. Although your mind made a few more notes to ask him later what was going on.

You followed Jaeyun with careful steps down the hallway, feeling the scent of masculine lotions mixing in the environment. There was a bit of Heeseung, Sunghoon, and Jaeyun everywhere. At least it was clean and smelled good, unconventional for any apartment where only boys lived. His friends were careful, at least that made you feel relieved.

When the two of you reached the door to his room, it was your turn to sigh, thinking about what awaited you while you were there with the boy. Even though it was his room, Jaeyun didn't let go of his gentlemanly manners and made way for you, his back against the frame and his hand on the doorknob to give you a better view of the room. It was cozy and so… Sim Jaeyun. You couldn’t explain it, but everything in that room was definitely him. From the frames and photos to the trophies and the bookshelf with things on display. Some medals and full bottles of liquor. One of the boys could have given him a gift and he didn’t even open it. You smiled at that, imagining that in the short time you had known him, Jaeyun was the one who drank the least among the boys.

“Sorry if this is all sudden, but—” his voice radiated to your ears, alerting you to the current situation you two found yourselves in. You turned to him, noticing how shy Jaeyun seemed inside his room. The click of the key locking the door didn’t scare you, especially because it wouldn’t be a threat to be locked in there with him regardless of how long the two of you spent. It could be a precaution while the two of you were alone “I needed this time with you.”

Slowly, Jaeyun approached where you were in the middle of his room. Your hands didn't have a clear path, a little nervous about what to do with them, so you left them at your sides and just watched him walk towards you. His head lowered and his eyes wandered all over the floor until he finally looked up at you.

“We're here now, aren't we?” you asked softly, the sound of your voice echoing through every fiber of Jaeyun's body and making him feel electric.

“We are” he said in the same tone, moving a little closer until there was finally no more space between you and him “Y/n…” Jaeyun tilted his head enough so that his height was no different from yours. The same slow ritual that was done before anything got in the way of the two of you. One of his hands slowly reached your face, pushing away any strand of hair that had been left there as you took the steps until you reached his room. His other hand went to your waist, holding you in front of him so that you had no chance of escaping.

You didn't want to be left behind, you needed to touch him too, so your hands slowly moved up Jaeyun's chest until they grabbed the collar of the shirt he was wearing. Your fingers played with the fabric before one of them entered the shirt and held him by the shoulders. That touch made him shiver all over.

Jaeyun tilted his head to one side and you, like a rehearsed dance, tilted it to the other. There was no need for any conversation between the two of you to know what you both intended to do at that moment. Your lips curved into a small smile when your eyes met his, so close and bright to yours. Those eyes that were seen in every way were now staring at you with so much repressed desire that you wondered if you two might have been feeling the same thing.

His hand slid from your face to your jaw, slowly tracing the line until it went down to your neck and anchored between it and your shoulder. The perfect place. As if Jaeyun's hand was literally made to be there. He held you subtly until he brought your face closer, his mouth finally brushing against yours. You weren't ashamed of the groan you let out when his lips finally brushed against yours, feeling the softness that was his mouth for more seconds than you had ever felt before.

But nothing would be so easy for the two of you if it weren't for another interruption. Not so direct this time, but the honking of some son of a bitch on the street startled you and Jaeyun at that moment, almost making him hesitate and let go of you.

“Fuck off” he cursed without caring, not caring that his heart was still in a frenzy from the small scare and interruption. He wouldn't let anything else ruin that moment.

Without thinking about anything else, Jaeyun finally joined his lips with yours in a slow kiss, even though his desire was overwhelming. Pressing his mouth to yours and feeling the heat of your lips, he could melt at that very moment. Your mouth was as delicious as he thought it would be, and as you slowly opened it to let his tongue pass, Jaeyun wasn't ashamed of the pleasurable sound he made at the touch of your warm, wet muscle against his.

The kiss was slow, although loaded with an underlying desire that the two of you had been keeping for so long. Jaeyun's hand remained on your neck as your tongues played in sync, your mouths sliding against each other as if they were made to fit together in that kiss. Your hands slowly ran to his hair, pulling the small strands on the back of his neck as he slid his teeth along your lower lip, just in time to suck on the tip of your tongue before kissing you again with even more intensity.

A shiver ran through your body as his hands began to grope your sides, bringing you even closer and pressing your body against his. You could feel every muscle in Jaeyun's body tense at your touch, but relax as you and he intensified that kiss. You had both waited for so long that now you could die in each other's mouths if it were possible.

“Y/n” he moaned your name, sliding his mouth along your jaw and spreading a bit of shared drool across your skin. You didn't mind the sloppiness, it was turning you on much more than you could admit. Jaeyun found a space between your neck to scrape his teeth and suck a good amount of your skin in a slow hickey.

“Jake” you moaned back, your hands running over his shoulders and down his body until stopping at his hips. It was all involuntary, but you were unable to stop yourself and grabbed him by the waist to press his hips against yours.

“Holy shit” Jaeyun gave an even more passionate hickey on your neck, running the tip of his tongue to soothe your skin when you moaned in response. He wanted to apologize for the carelessness, but he didn’t know how to react to that “You’re going to drive me crazy doing this, for God’s sake” panting, he lifted his face to align with yours. His slightly sweaty forehead was now against yours, his breathing practically irregular as he opened his eyes to look at you.

Unreal. That was what Jaeyun was like after a full session of making out with you. His lips had become even more annoyingly beautiful when they were red and drooling with your drool. His eyes were dazed and downcast from your touches. His entire state in front of you was because of you. It made your panties feel wet.

“Sorry, I—” you sighed, your hands still on Jaeyun’s hips as you tried not to focus on his kissable mouth in front of you “You brought me here and, well… We…”

“I needed to kiss you” he blurted out. His mouth went down to yours again to slowly kiss you again. Jaeyun traced your entire lower lip with the tip of his tongue before feeling you sucking on the tip of his tongue like he had done to you before. That was going to kill him, for sure “I had to bring you here to do this because I couldn’t stand anyone interrupting us anymore. It got on my nerves and—”

Your laugh escaped softly. You looked at him and now reality hit you. It had all been part of a scheme he created so he could finally kiss you. Sim Jaeyun had made all that effort just for a kiss from you… It couldn’t be more perfect.

You leaned into him, your arms wrapping around Jaeyun's neck as you pulled him down and brought his mouth close to yours.

“Now we have plenty of time to do more than just kiss, Jake” you brushed the tip of your nose against him, feeling Jaeyun's breath hitch “What do you think?”

“Would you… Would you let me—” your nod was the confirmation he needed for this to happen. Not that he was intending to, especially since Jaeyun didn't even know if he would be able to kiss you. Let alone have you in his bed that same night. It was a bonus he wouldn't miss for anything in the world.

His heart was beating hard inside his chest, the sight of you slowly moving away from him as you walked backward to the bed was the most perfect sight he had ever seen. There was no way anything could disrupt that moment and he swore that if any noise made, or something happened, he wouldn't stop. There was no way. Nothing could take his focus away as your hands went to the hem of your shirt, slowly pulling it off and showing him the bra you were wearing. Jaeyun was left breathless by all of that. If you were perfectly covered up, without your clothes on he was thinking he might go crazy.

As your hands tangled in the waistband of your pants, he couldn't stay behind and started to undress himself too. Without taking his eyes off you, the eye contact was very vivid as each piece of clothing was discarded on the floor of his room. Neither of you wanted to waste a single second without looking at each other until you were completely naked.

Jaeyun approached, holding you by the waist and gently placing you on his bed. The mattress hugged you like a comfort while his body fit perfectly between your legs. His eyes traveled over every curve of your body, every little detail to record in his memory until he finally looked at your face. So close, so delicate, and at the same time breathtaking. It was then that he kissed you again. This time with a little more intensity than before.

He settled between your legs, one hand holding your hip while the other went to hold your chin, steadying your face as the kiss became hungrier. Tongues fought for dominance and a small trickle of drool ran down the corner of your mouth, but neither of you cared about that. Both you and he wanted to make up for lost time forget any disagreements with the outside world and focus only on each other.

Jaeyun's mouth separated from yours, thirsty to taste you in every corner. He wanted to know what you tasted like beyond the kiss he had been waiting for. Still holding onto your waist, he held your body in place as he trailed his lips down your chin, trailing a teasing path of drool and hot breath against your skin. Down to your collarbone, where his tongue made a longer path up to the top of your breasts.

You moaned his name so beautifully that Jaeyun never thought his cock could vibrate so much because of a sound. It was pathetic for him to admit, but he would say if anyone asked, that you had been the only person on the face of the Earth to get that from him.

“You are simply unreal to me” he whispered against your skin, licking up your chest and down to your nipple. He circled the tip of his tongue and sucked on the sensitive bud.

“Fuck, Jake” you grabbed his hair, almost crushing the boy’s face into your chest. His mouth made a warm place against your nipple as he sucked slowly and deliciously. The sucking made you even wetter.

He smiled against your breast as he gave the other one his due attention, bringing his hand to the one that was already containing his drool to squeeze the soft flesh between his fingers. There was no way you could go any further for that man between your legs. You wanted to pull out every strand of Jaeyun's hair for the little provocation, even more so every time you moaned his name softly and he made sure to suck on your nipple a little more.

Jaeyun's mouth went down between your breasts this time, running his drool over your skin up to above your belly button. He circled the tip of his tongue there, looking up to meet your closed eyes and delighting in the sensation.

“Eyes on me, Y/n” he asked softly, his mouth blowing hotly above your pussy when he finally aligned his head down there. You didn't know if you were able to see him in that state, but if he was unreal kissing you, what was sucking you? There was no way to know that if you didn't look. So you just obeyed him, opening your eyes and finding him looking at you “I promise I’ll be quick, I just need to taste you.”

You don’t even know why you nodded at his request and much less why he wanted to taste you, but you wouldn’t be crazy enough to stop him. Not when the tip of his tongue touched your clit so slowly. As hot as when he touched your nipple.

“Shit— Jake, what…” you moaned once more, a little more prolonged when he stretched out his tongue and licked a large stripe on your pussy. Collecting your essence with the tip of his tongue.

Jaeyun licked your pussy as if he was kissing you in the mouth. Each pass of his tongue through your inner lips and each circle on your clit was another reason to make you moan even louder, intertwining your fingers in the dark strands of his hair and controlling yourself with the urge to push your pussy against his face. It was surreal the way Jaeyun was eating you. The alternating between fast and slow licks, circling your needy hole that was clenching around almost nothing, was too much for you to handle.

And he felt it. Jaeyun felt every contraction of your entrance as he passed the tip of his tongue, circling the area and feeling your taste even more. It was addictive. Like everything about you was. He held his hands on your hips as you fixed your fingers in his hair, slowly letting you ride his tongue as he left the muscle erect for you to delight yourself as you pleased. He wanted you to feel pleasure on his tongue at that moment, although Jaeyun was already feeling his cock ache, pressing it against the mattress of the bed.

“Jake” your voice brought him back to reality as you rubbed your pussy on his tongue, Jaeyun taking the break between keeping it still and, sometimes, sucking on your clit when he felt your pussy descend completely into his mouth “I’m going to cum—”

“No” he stopped quickly, lifting his head from your pussy to look at you.

Jaeyun’s chin was covered with all your juices in addition to the amount of saliva he deposited while sucking you. Your eyes didn’t leave his face for a second as he lifted his body so that his face was close to yours again.

“I said I just wanted to taste you a little, you’re not supposed to cum right now” he sighed, his breathing still fast from being so fixated on your pussy that he almost forgot to breathe. You smiled tiredly at him, even though you weren’t even halfway through what the two of you were going to do.

“Why not?” you pouted, feeling Jaeyun settle between your legs and your hands quickly ran up to his face. Your thumbs ran over his chin, wiping away any traces of you or his mouth, even though your scent was still there. He leaned in a little more, capturing your lips in a slow kiss. The slow sharing tried to calm the nerves between the two of you for what was about to happen.

Neither you nor Jaeyun were nervous about this, just apprehensive about the fact that it would be your first time with each other. The kiss had been magnificent. Everything had been perfect so far, and he wanted this to end up being perfect too. So, slowly, he brought one of his hands to his cock and held it firmly. He ran the head of his cock all over your wet and drooling pussy, wanting to collect as much essence as he could so that his entrance inside you wouldn't be painful.

After a while he finally managed to do that, the head of his cock circled your hole and, carefully, Jaeyun inserted himself inside you little by little. The slow burn of his cock makes your hole mix in pain and pleasure. He filled you with every inch since he entered and you don't remember anything having filled you as well as the few seconds of Jaeyun's cock inside you.

“Because I want you to cum on my cock” he lowered his face into the crook of your neck, pressing his lips close to your ear and with a shit-eating grin on his face even though you weren't seeing it.

Jaeyun's hands went to your hips, using them as leverage to start thrusting into you. Starting the slow and sensual movements, moving his hips to a point where he could go all the way deep inside you and slowly pull it out. The coming and going of each veiny inch of his cock inside your walls only gave more fuel to your moans with his name and your hands desperate to touch something. The target this time was Jaeyun's bare back where his nails dug in as he began to pick up the pace.

“You feel so good— Fuck” he groaned as he thrust hard for the first time. Your groan almost made him back out and apologize because he was so lost in the pleasure that he didn’t even ask if he was hurting you. But as soon as he heard your groan and felt your nails burn on his back, Jaeyun knew he was doing the right job.

“Jake!” your hands ran up to the back of his neck, sliding to Jaeyun’s face and holding him facing you. It got even more intimate as he thrust a little harder into your pussy. “Don’t… Don’t stop, please.”

“I don’t plan on doing this, baby” he was panting, his cheeks flushed and his lips even redder. God, you couldn’t cum just from that sight, you had to pull yourself together with this.

Jaeyun felt the encouragement in your eyes and your words as he watched your mouth part and the hold of your gaze each time he went deeper into you. His balls slapping against your pussy made the wet noise between your legs even more erotic as it accompanied your moans and his. The slaps on your skin were getting faster and louder as Jaeyun's hips gained strength to go deeper inside you.

He was stretching you too much, your pussy getting wetter and wetter as he went deeper. The head of his cock nudging your spongy spots so well and rubbing against your tight, sensitive walls.

You pulled Jaeyun's face close to yours, your mouths inches apart sharing each other's breaths and swallowing the moans you both spilled without caring about each other's names.

“You're going to cum with me, aren't you?” he whispered against your mouth, outlining your lower lip with the tip of his tongue. You only moaned in response and Jaeyun thrust deeper, earning a scream from you when his cock hit your cervix. His hand slowly grabbed your throat and he lifted your face, although you two still had your mouths close to each other.

“I want to cum all over your cock, Jake” you replied, your hand circling his fist that still had his hand on your throat. Jaeyun didn’t apply any pressure to the spot, but having you at his mercy like that was already creating countless scenarios for next time.

Unconsciously his thumb slid over your lower lip, seeing how red your mouth was from the whole session you two shared. In an act of lust and excitement, you circled the tip of your tongue on his finger, putting it inside your mouth.

“Holy shit—” he moaned.

“Faster, Jakey” your pleading eyes and your voice muffled by his thumb were too much for Jaeyun to handle. And Jakey? That had never been said to him, and even more so in such a sensual way and with such a delicious moan that it made his hair stand on end.

He felt something rush into his blood at the combination of your lips sucking on his thumb and your pussy sucking on his cock in equally delicious and wet ways. Jaeyun was feeling on cloud nine having you like this. His hips rocked even harder, using his free hand to support the side of your hips and gain even more momentum to slam mercilessly into your pussy. The slaps on your skin burned his pelvis each time he met your drooling pussy hard. His cock being swallowed deliciously by every wall of yours.

“Oh, fuck” your lips slipped from his thumb as Jaeyun hit you deep again, his pussy-covered cock filling you in every corner. He decided to abandon his hand from your mouth to replace it with his own, feeling your hips stutter as his cock pulsed violently inside you.

“Can I—” he whispered, lips hovering over yours in ragged breaths as the sweat and sheen of Jaeyun’s skin reflected in his eyes. “Can I cum inside you?” he asked so gently, unlike the relentless movements of his hips slamming against yours.

“Please” your moaned plea was enough for him, there was no way to push Jaeyun’s buttons any further like that.

So he focused on kissing you again, sharing the movement of your tongues frantically as he drank in all your moans as his hips gained strength against yours again. Jaeyun’s heavy balls slapped against your clit with each thrust, the hot sound of wetness between the two of you and that was when he lifted your body a little as he pulled your hips that aligned the perfect angle. You felt your entire body tremble as the knot in your stomach broke and you came. So hard and intense, squeezing the walls of your pussy and almost making Jaeyun stop thrusting into you.

But he wouldn't give up, and as you came and squeezed him, it was too much to take. He moaned your name loudly followed by the curses he could remember as he emptied his load of cum inside you. Feeling your walls milk his cock as the jets of cum bathed your walls in a thick, hot white.

Jaeyun could still feel your walls convulsing around his still throbbing cock and spilling the last drops. The two of you stayed still in that position for some time. Countless minutes if you were to notice, but the feeling of still being like that was surreal.

“I think…” he breathed deeply, his mouth still close to yours breathing the same air as you. Rough and warm, irregular and comforting “We need to clean up.”

He didn't want to hear your protests, although he wanted to stay there and he knew that if he pulled out quickly, it would make both you and him sensitive. Then, carefully, Jaeyun pulled his cock out of your pussy with a hiss, earning a moan from you at how empty you felt. The sight of your hole leaking from how much he came could make him jump you for a second round, that wouldn't be a bad idea. But he had to be rational and try one thing at a time. At least for now.

So quickly, running to the bathroom, he grabbed a towel and wet it before wringing it out and only dampening the cloth. Running back to the bed to clean up the remains of his and your sex as carefully as he could. Wearing the towel in the laundry basket before getting back into bed with you.

“Hey, Y/n” Jaeyun whispered your name as he lay down next to you, pulling your body close to his and snuggling you against his bare chest. You grunted softly, feeling the tiredness take over every fiber of your body, but gathering some energy to lift your face and rest your chin on his chest.

“Yes, Jakey?” you smiled slowly, the redness on your face still evident and Jaeyun felt his heart pound even more at that. You looked beautiful in every way.

“Thank you for that, it was so…” he sighed “Amazing, seriously. Thank you.”

“You were amazing at everything, you know that?” you lowered your face to kiss his chest, moving his aching body up just enough for your mouth to be close, kissing him slowly there “I thank you.”

“Let’s thank the universe for conspiring in favor of this, then” he smiled against your mouth.

“Finally. Thank you, universe” you smiled too, kissing him back before feeling Jaeyun’s arms around your waist to make you lie down next to him. Snuggling you a little closer and enjoying the moment that the two of you should have had a long time ago.

Because both of you would enjoy the truce that the universe gave you two, after all, you and Jaeyun deserved it. Nothing else conspiring against what you and he should have had from the start.

© ikeuverse, 2024. do not copy, translate or steal my stories.

[inkskinned]

you found out today that a phrase you have used before was coined by an abusive man. this felt like getting your teeth taken out. it made you sick and sad and tired, but not surprised.

bad people tell you to be careful when you talk badly of bad men, that it could "ruin" a life. you had your life ruined by a bad man, not that it ever matters to them. your real life having real consequences is not valued as highly as the potential of his future.

this has always been a frustrating little mathematics problem for you. you've missed school and had to call out sick at work and had panic attacks that lasted for weeks. it stole sleep and food and friends from you. you cried in public, fucked your relationships up. and the whole time: your present has never mattered so much as the great what if! of his future. like - one life (your life) is already ruined, should we really ruin two?

so you live with the consequences and he doesn't, and that's just like, something you need therapy for. you once discussed this with one of your friends over coffee. she chewed the wooden stirrer, looked off into the distance. "once i became a victim, everything that happens to me afterward is automatically less interesting in the eyes of the general public. it is always about him. he changed my identity. to survivor. to statistic. meanwhile this whole time - i am a person."

you learned in college that three out of five of your favorite artists and authors were actually abusive assholes. these days, you are no longer surprised. oh, is that what was happening behind closed doors? of course it was, he was a "genius," and she was just a girl. you are talking about him in art history, so obviously his career was absolutely ruined, for eternity. that's what happens, right? they strike your name from the record and refuse to remember you? nobody really knows her name, but hey. that's what you get for being close to celebrity.

you got into an argument about it, which was a bad argument, because it made you cry. he said what, you want us to just ignore all the things this man did because he made a few women uncomfortable? and you'd balled your fists up and choked on it. later, in bed, you agonized over the response you'd been trying to articulate but never found the right moment to deploy: you are ignoring what any person could do if they weren't being fucking abused. maybe her talents far exceeded his and she was just never allowed to fucking use them. maybe we only see genius in white men because they purposefully fucking squash and silence any other people with talent.

but you'd cried about it instead of saying that, because you are the cost. you are the talent and potential that he took. you used to be brave and smart and clever and unafraid. like a lich, he stole years of your life.

quiet on set made you sad and sick and tired, but not surprised. unfortunately, one of the things he said was true: an entire network of people allowed it to continue. this is not news to you, because you have seen entire networks of people make the same fucking excuses when the same thing or-worse happened to you. and your particular story isn't even in hollywood. it was just a guy. it was still difficult getting people to stand up for you.

you and your friend wait in line for your coffee. like a standup joke, one man turns to the other and says "can't wait for every bitch to come crawling out of the woodwork complaining about harassment. it's another metoo." and you think - oh, that's the network. your boss tucks her hair back and whispers that while your skirt is cute, you're giving the boys the wrong idea. that's the network. when you'd told your "friend" about what happened, she'd said oh you must have misunderstood, that would never happen. and that's the network.

you woke up this morning panting, because years later you still have panic attacks. oh, it's not a network, actually, it's a web. and you, little moth: are you still surprised you're caught in it?

[unconventional-lawnchair]

“You can’t just…kiss me to win a fucking argument, [NAME]!” “You’re right…but did it work?” With Sirius pretty please 🙏🏽

Kiss And Make-Up

Sirius Black x Reader

WC: ~1.3k

Summary: Pool side at the Potters, Sirius takes you for a swim.

The summer sun hung lazily in the sky above the sprawling Potter Manor, casting long, warm shadows over the garden. The large pool glistened invitingly, its clear waters sparkling under the light. You and Lily had spent most of the afternoon lounging by the pool, watching as James and Sirius made a fool of themselves, attempting to play an American sport, touch football. Perhaps it was your playful comments you made about your home country being a bit too intense for the British boys that drove them to the down right sad display.

Especially with just two of them, Peter inside helping Euphemia in the kitchen and Remus actually enjoying the pool, talking to you.

Remus was in the shallow end, leaning against the edge of the pool, his arms resting casually on the ledge as he looked over at you and Lily. His hair was damp, and a gentle smile played on his lips as he listened to the banter happening poolside. Every now and then, he would glance over to where James and Sirius were, both of them attempting to toss a football back and forth, their movements clumsy and completely lacking coordination.

Lily shook her head, a smile tugging at her lips as she watched James scramble to catch the ball, only for it to slip through his fingers yet again. "Honestly, it's like watching a pair of toddlers learning how to walk," She said with a laugh, her sunglasses perched on her nose as she leaned back on her lounge chair.

You grinned, nodding in agreement as you glanced over at Remus, who gave you a knowing smile. "I don't think I've ever seen two people so determined to be so bad at something.” You added, shaking your head, the laughter bubbling up in your chest.

Remus chuckled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "You know, I think they're convinced that if they just keep at it long enough, they'll somehow master it," He mused, his voice carrying that warmth and dry humor he always had.

You shook your head, unable to hide your grin as James let out a frustrated groan, turning to Sirius. "Pads, you've got to catch it properly!" He complained, hands on his hips, the football lying at his feet.

Sirius, ever the dramatic, threw his hands up in the air. "Prongs, I’m not built for this! Give me a broomstick any day of the week- this is madness!" He shot you a look, his eyes narrowing playfully. "You Yanks and your weird sports."

"Excuses, excuses," You tutted, lifting your drink to your lips, the cold condensation a welcome relief against the summer heat. "Maybe I should go over there and show you how it's done, Black."

Remus let out a laugh, shaking his head. "Now that's something I'd pay to see."

Lily giggled, nodding in agreement. "Yes, please. Put them out of their misery."

Sirius shot you a wicked grin, his eyes alight with that familiar mischief. "Oh, yeah? You think you could take me, love?" He called out, jogging over to the poolside, his hair tousled from running around. He put his hands on his hips, giving you a challenging look.

You rolled your eyes, shaking your head. "You can't even catch a football, Sirius. I don't think I'd need to try very hard."

His grin widened, that playful glint turning into something more dangerous, something that had your heart skipping a beat. He took a step closer, leaning down towards you, his voice dropping to a low murmur. "You know, you talk a big game... but I don't think you'd have the guts to get in that pool."

You raised an eyebrow, trying to keep your cool. "Is that a dare, Black?"

His eyes twinkled, and he gave you a slow nod. "It is, actually. I dare you to get in that pool right now."

You leaned back in your chair, shaking your head with a laugh. "Not a chance, pretty boy. I'm not oblivious, I know you just want to see me cold and wet.” You smirked and his pale cheeks flushed a slight red. You rolled your eyes as his smirk grew wolffish.

Sirius grinned, straightening up, the mischief dancing in his eyes. "Oh, is that it?" He asked, voice dripping with playful challenge. "You think I won't actually make you get in that pool?"

You crossed your arms, tilting your head up at him defiantly. "I think you can't," You shot back. "You may talk big, but you're all bark and no bite, Black."

His eyes narrowed slightly, and you could almost see the wheels turning in his head. "You know what, darling?" He took a step closer, a hint of something daring in his gaze. "You just made a very dangerous dare."

You blinked, your smile faltering slightly as he lunged towards you, grabbing you around the waist. You let out a startled shriek, scrambling against his grip, but Sirius was strong and determined, his laughter filling your ears as he hoisted you off the lounge chair.

"Sirius!" You yelled, your laughter mingling with your protests as you tried to wriggle free. He ignored your struggling, carrying you towards the edge of the pool, his grin growing wider as he approached the water.

Lily and Remus both burst into laughter, Lily clapping her hands in delight as she watched the scene unfold. "Oh, there she goes!" Lily exclaimed, shaking her head. Remus leaned forward on the edge of the pool, his smile wide and eyes filled with amusement.

"Sirius, don't you dare-" You started, but it was too late. With one swift motion, Sirius dropped you into the pool. You hit the water with a splash, the cold enveloping you instantly. You resurfaced, gasping and sputtering, your hair plastered to your face.

"You absolute git!" You shouted, but the laughter bubbled up despite the shock. Sirius, still fully clothed, gave you a mock bow from the pool's edge.

"And now," He said, winking, "I’m an equal-opportunity swimmer." With that, he jumped in right after you, landing beside you with a splash.

You turned to him, eyes narrowed. "You’re impossible, you know that?" You muttered, but there was a smile tugging at your lips.

Sirius grinned, his dark hair now dripping wet, his eyes glistening with a mix of triumph and warmth. He swam closer to you, his face softening as he looked at you. "And yet, you still love me, don't you?" He teased, though there was a genuine question in his eyes, a vulnerability he rarely showed.

You sighed, rolling your eyes dramatically, but there was no hiding the affection in your voice. "Maybe. But if you ever throw me in again, I swear I'll hex you."

He smirked, inching even closer, his voice dropping to a low murmur. “I think I could get you to forgive me, though.” Before you could reply, he leaned in and pressed his lips to yours, a kiss that was both gentle and full of intensity.

When he finally pulled away, you glared at him, your heart pounding in your chest. “You can’t just… kiss me to win a fucking argument, Sirius!” You sputtered, your voice filled with exasperation.

Sirius grinned, his eyes twinkling as he shrugged. “You’re right,” He said, not even trying to hide his smugness, “but did it work?”

You opened your mouth to argue, but the warmth in his eyes and the curve of his smile made your words falter. A reluctant smile tugged at your lips, and you huffed, shoving him lightly. “You’re such a prat.”

Sirius laughed, his arm coming around your waist, pulling you close in the water. "Maybe. But I'm your prat," He murmured, his forehead resting against yours.

You huffed, splashing him with the water, but you didn’t pull away. The sun continued to shine above you, the sound of Lily and Remus's laughter mingling with yours, and for a moment, everything felt light, simple, and blissfully free- just two people lost in the warmth of summer and each other.

You wished it could stay like this forever.

[screeching-bunny]

Hi! I was wondering if you could do the yandre!game show host with a himbo/bimbo reader

Yandere! Game Show Host x Bimbo/Himbo Reader Asks 1

Warnings: Obsessive Behavior, Yandere Thoughts, Bad Writing, Stalking, Possessive Behavior, Reader is Referred as ‘You’

Yandere! Game Show Host would absolutely adore you. He absolutely enjoys how there's absolutely not a single thought behind your eyes. He could literally be nonchalantly pulling up your clothes and you would be too dumb or preoccupied to notice him doing it. Would definitely make you wear provocative clothes all under the pretense of how it would be good for the viewer ratings and that this is just the policy of the company. Now get your ass in those tight little outfits before he explodes due to anticipation.

Yandere! Game Show Host likes how you are basically almost always dolled and glammed up no matter the time of day. He’d definitely feed into your shopaholic habits if you had any and would only allow you to get the skimpiest of clothes. There is probably a one hundred percent chance of you getting every single question wrong on the quizzes so he has to alter your answers for you.

Yandere! Game Show Host: “Okay now sweetie, what does blue and red make?”

You: “Uhhhhhh orange?”

Yandere! Game Show Host: “..... what's that you say? Purple? Why, that’s correct!!!”

You: “No I said–”

Yandere! Game Show Host: “Yep and I heard you say purple!!!!”

Other Contestants: Side-eying him

Viewers: *Too stunned to speak*

Yandere! Game Show Host is shoving his tongue down your throat the fastest chance he gets. Out of all of the yanderes he is definitely the most horniest. If you ever tell him that you want to pay him back for all he’s done for you, he’s immediately whipping his cock out, no questions asked. Just put those glossy lips right on there and all of your debt is immediately forgiven. He definitely makes sure to emphasize how sexually frustrated he is and how he would just loveeee it if someone were to give him the best sloppy toppy ever. Tries to convince you that if you don’t do it he might actually die.

Yandere! Game Show Host enjoys how easily distracted you get and how you have a hard time focusing on multiple things at once. If you ever tried to escape from him all he has to do is talk about how female hyenas have penises and you’d immediately forget what you were about to do. If he ever needed to fall asleep all he'd have to do is talk about the fall of Rome and you’d be out like a light.

Yandere! Game Show Host takes advantage of how you never fully process the dangerous situations you put yourself in. For example when it comes to the sleeping arrangement, contestants are put strictly in one room to be monitored 24/7 but you’d probably complain how you don’t want to sleep in a room with so many people in it. Yandere! Game Show Host would happily decide to offer for you to sleep with him in his bed which you would readily agree to. Next thing you know you’re stuck in bed with a creep who’s busy fondling you to sleep properly. He’d probably try to make this a regular thing and just force you to stay there every night from then on there.

—

You: “It was so nice of you to let me sleep in your bed that was so nice of you. It’s really weird though, you have such a big house but only one bedroom with one bed. You should probably start decorating your house better.”

Yandere! Game Show Host: “Yeah silly me I should really do better.”

You: “Wait a sec–” Notices how there's a piece of underwear that you lost a week ago peeking out of his drawer. “OH MY GOSH YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE!! YOU NOTICED HOW MY UNDERWEAR HAS GONE MISSING SO YOU GOT ME NEW PAIRS!!! HOW THOUGHTFUL OF YOU!!!”

Yandere! Game Show Host: sweating nervously. “... Yeah I noticed that too. You might not want to touch those though. They’re a little dirty because I haven’t washed them yet and accidentally spilled something on them yesterday–”

[gamergirl-niffler]

Being Married to Haganezuka - headcanons

Relationship between swordsmith and demon slayer was actually unheard of, but you didn't complain at all.

It was really comfortable, you lived with your husband and were close enough to be ready when needed.

Your husband was a difficult person: hot-blooded, extremely dedicated to his craft, and socially inept.

Many were sure he would never find a wife. That was until you came into the village, after all Hotaru was just a man and despite all of his heavy flaws managed to win your heart.

People hated him, and you knew that, but thankfully your presence brightened his image. Just a tiny bit. But still.

--------------

‌He doesn't just talk about work. He rants. 

A lot, actually. 

Thanks to it, you know all about his clients, even if he has very little of those.

"I need to make new swords! And guess for who! For a kid that barely made it through Finale Selection!" Hotaru complains as you hum in acknowledgement while braiding the long black locks of your husband. "I am sure he will be like the others! Not respecting my work whatsoever!"

It's a simple routine before bed. He rants, letting out some of the frustration while your attention calms him down. It's always enough to actually allow him to properly rest during the night. 

‌Sleeping with him is yet another completely different thing.

Once the two of you get into bed, there is no running away. When his arms wrap around you, it's over, you are stuck like this until the sun rises again. He is simply not letting you go. 

Hotaru will never admit it out loud, but that's exactly what he is afraid of, you were the only woman that ever wanted him, so what would he do without you around.

You are his biggest treasure, he is not letting you go. Ever.

‌ Mornings with Haganezuka are much nicer. 

He is calm and rested as you're helping him to get ready for work right after breakfast.

"I hate that mask," You say with a grimace, while looking at the ugly mask in your hand. 

Of course, you understand the whole idea of masks but it didn't change the fact you didn't like them, you preferred to see your husband without it.

He snatches the item from your hand and hands you a shawl. "You better help me with my hair," Hotaru mutters, sitting in front of you to make it easier. "You also should get ready."

With an eye roll, you started to wrap his hair, making sure they won't bother him during the work. "I am just as ready as you are," you sum up, tying the shawl as tightly as possible. 

Once you were done he got up, put on the mask and turned to you. "I love you," he admits, while his hands move to your collar to properly button it.

Looking up at him, "I... I love you too...," you say with a soft grimace, making him frown under the mask. "What's your problem now?”

"Sorry. It's hard to say with that thing on your face," you admit slowly.

"You're annoying," He scoffs and turns to leave.

After grabbing your sword, you could follow him, walking by his side and holding his hand until you reach your post. Only then the two of you finally part ways for the day.

‌Hotaru is the one taking care of your sword. 

How could he not!

Not only he's a swordsmith, but he is also your husband, so his duty to you is doubled or even tripled! Not to mention, the sword is his own creation.

"Did you clean it? Are you sure it's clean? Maybe you chipped it? Let me see!"

You need to keep him away, using your own hands to make sure he won't get to your sword. "Hotaru, love. I am sure of all of it," You sigh, but before you know it he already has his hands on it. 

How did he even do that?! 

With careful eyes, he checks the blade and handle to be fully sure you're telling the truth. 

He couldn't allow his beloved wife to walk around with a sword that isn't properly taken care of. Hotaru wanted to be sure you are safe. "It's getting blunt. I will sharpen it for you. You can take the other one."

And just like that, your husband is off to do his things. There is no stopping him nor making him postpone the work.

Speaking about work!

Hotaru is hard working and stubborn.

Once he gets to work... He. Is. Gone. 

The mix of passion and dedication in his case are actually a "deadly" combination. There is no way of pulling him away. Sadly, even as his own wife, you don't have this privilege.

Once, when you attempted to take the sword away to stop him, Hotaru snapped at you, his voice filled with frustration. "Don't you see I'm busy? This must be done, and I won't deliver a poorly made sword!"

After that, you never tried that again.

He can be gone for the whole day and night while forging a new blade. It's annoying when you cannot spend the evening snuggling with your husband. 

‌BUT you are actually useful when he loses his temper! 

"Y/N-sama!"  One of the young apprentices yells, getting your attention immediately. Kids here love you since you are much nicer than Hotaru, but one of them approaching you while on duty isn't something usual.

"What is it? Did something happen?" You ask, giving the boy a soft smile.

Boy nodded quickly. "It's Haganezuka! He lost it again."

Letting out an annoyed sigh, you nod and quickly follow the boy just to find your husband held by three swordsmiths, while he's thrashing around to get free while another swordsmith stood nearby.

"What happened here?!" You ask with a frown. 

Hotaru growls. "He interrupted my work! I was almost done with the sword! Now I will have to start all over again! I'll kill you!"

You blink and rub your face, no matter how many times it happened, you still couldn't get used to it. "Hotaru. That's enough, let's go home. I will make you mitarashi dangos."

He immediately stops his thrashing around and looks at you. Other swordsmiths look at each other confused and slowly let him go.

Instead of attacking the man that took the sword, he walks to you and hugs you tightly. "Let's go. I want mitarashi dangos."

Of course, it's not the only situation like this. Things like this often happen because of his temper. Sometimes you need to resort to tickling his sides, but this ends in you dragging him back home and him later scolding you for even doing this.

‌ Since he works hard. He gets hurt.

Hotaru hates this, but at the same time he loves it. No one likes to get hurt, and he as a swordsmith sometimes gets his hands a little damaged in his work fever.

It's annoying. Wounds even if shallow still hurt and disturb the work.

Thankfully, he has you and he can always count on your help. He will not admit it, but he loves the way your palms feel against his own when you wrap his injuries.

You are a slayer, yet your hands are small and soft compared to his. Not to mention, you are always so gentle and careful while taking care of you. No one else can take care of his injuries just like you do.

"There you go," you say sweetly, tying a knot on a fresh bandage on his hand. Before he can thank you, you press a soft kiss to the injury. "I told you to be careful and to work less, but you never listen. Is it really that hard to listen just a little bit? For once?”

No matter how many times he returned home with cuts or/and abrasions, you always helped him and then scolded him. Normally he would get angry at someone for talking to him like this, but when it comes to you; Hotaru can't be mad, he actually feels oddly happy you do this. 

--------------

In summary.

Hotaru is a good man. 

Others may hate him for his slightly angry nature, but that's because no one knows him like you do, not even a village chief.

He loves you in his own way and is forever grateful for you and the fact you love him back just as much.

Some people think you may regret marrying such a man, but you truly don't. He is the best thing that ever happened to you, and you wouldn't change him for anyone else.

[meetletsinmontauk]

Stairway to Heaven- P.S

Synopsis: Heeseung said the trail would take them to a waterfall but for Sunghoon it took him to Heaven.

Disclaimer: nsfw, contains smut!!

A/n: No, Sunghoon haven't die. And yes, there's more Heeseung fic coming. Enjoy!

She was sleeping like a baby, she didn’t sleep well in weeks since college required too much of her. But now the exams were over, finally recess, finally she could wake up late and do nothing all day… Or at least it was what she thought.

It was 6:40 am when she heard her phone ringing.She opened her eyes with a lot of effort and grabbed her phone to see ‘Sunghoonie’ shining on her face. She groaned in frustration before picking the phone. Usually she would just put her phone in sleep mode but it was Sunghoon who was calling. She didn’t know Sunghoon for a long time, just a couple of months, he was Jay’s and Jake’s roomate. She met him because of Heeseung and Ni-ki, her classmates from uni, at a party they dragged her to. Since the first time they interacted, they felt a sexual tension going on, but nothing ever happened. It didn’t mean she didn't want it to happen.

“Wake uuuuppppp!!!!”, Sunghoon screamed on the phone. She pulled it away from her ear “Don’t scream, man” “Good morning for you too” “Morning, Hoon” “Good morning, you are talking to me, so your day is good already”, she chuckled “Good morning. What are you calling me so early?” “Are you in free today?” “Yes” “Put on gym clothes, we are going to hike” “What?” “Hike. Doing some cardio" "I know what a hike means, I just think this is a little out of the blue coming from yoy..." "Heeseung hyung and Jake want to go hiking, but we need 4 people and Jay refuses to go and Ni-ki is recovering from a cold so I am inviting you” “So I'm your third option?” “My one and only third option”, she chuckled, “You mean like going to a trail?” “Yes!” “When and where should I meet you guys?” “We can pick you up, you tell me when” “An hour, I'll text you the address” “Okkkkk!” “Stop screaming, bro!” “No! See you in an hour, byeee”, she hung up the phone since he was screaming again.

…

She sat on the backseat of Hee’s car with Sunghoon. It was hell the way to the park, cause she felt the urge to touch him, strip down his clothes, and ride him on the backseat right there in front of Heeseung and Jake, while she gripped on his hair and called out his name. But she couldn’t, which was very frustrating. When they got there, they found out there were 2 different trails which would end up in the same waterfall. So they decided to split in pairs.

“You and Jake go that way and we go this way”, Sunghoon suggested to Heeseung. “Why do you get her as your partner?”, Jake complained, he wanted to have the opportunity of watching her wearing that gym top from very close during an hour and a half. “Because I’m handsome, funny and cool, so I’ll keep her entertained”, Jake rolled his eyes,“But we can let her decide”. The 3 pair of eyes had falen on her, “It's fine by me” “See!?” “Ok, but we are staying with that trail”, Jake said.

...

She knew why she liked to stay at home, cause staying at home didn’t involve walking in nature for 40 minutes while she fought against the urge of kissing Sunghoon. Especially when he kept up with the dad jokes and all she wanted was to shut him up. When she thought things couldn’t be worse, they saw a stair. A huge stair, with about a hundred steps. “God, kill me now”, she muttered before stepping on the first step. “Hey! Stop!”, he called her, “Why?” “Let’s make it funnier” “Please, no more dad jokes” “No. Let’s make a bet” “There we go…” “The first person to get on top can ask anything for the other person and they have to do it”, she raised an eyebrow “Anything?” “Anything” “And the other can’t say no?” “Yes” “Oh, you’re going to regret this” “So you’re down for it?”, she nodded, “Ok, let’s do it” “But get out of the step”, she joined him on the base of the stair “Let’s count together” “Alright, on 3 we go” “Ok”, they aligned their bodies so they would be at the same line and started to count “1, 2, 3”, Hoon placed his arm in front of her to block her, “Bro, that’s cheating!” “We never said that cheating isn’t allowed” “So it’s like that?”, she approached him and bumped his hips with hers, making him unbalance, “Hey!”, he complained. After he lost balance, she ran like a bullet, when Hoon looked at her again she was already halfway the big stair when he not even ran 30 steps.

He tried to catch up, but she was already 10 steps from the top, he wasn’t going to make it. When she reach there, he decided to stop running, she would have to wait for him if she wanted a prize. “H-how…”, he breathed heavily, when he met her on the final goal “... You're so fast”, she smiled “You are the one who decided to play dirty”. He stopped in front of her, breathless, she placed her hands on his shoulders, massaging it, “Breathe” “I’m ok”, he leaned his hands on his thighs and took some time to catch up his breath. When he finally did it, he straightened his body and looked at her “So, what do you want from me?”, she smirked, then moved her hands to the collar of his shirt, and pulled him down while she stood up in her tiptoes and kissed him on the lips. She kissed him softly and for her surprise, he kissed her back, as softly as she did.

He ran to reach the top of the stairway but he reached Heaven.

“Oh!”, he said when she pulled away, he was expecting her to ask for a meal or maybe an expensive thing, but she kissed him, he was surprised. She planted her feet on the ground again and let go of his shoulder, she probably shouldn’t have done that, but he was so sexy and his lips were so inviting and she didn’t want anything else from him. She looked down at her feet and blushed “Sorry, I should have ask…” “Kiss me again” “What?” “Kiss me again” “I…” “Kiss me again. I am going to repeat it for the rest of your life till you do it again”, she blinked, “You can’t be serious” “Kiss me again” “But…” “Kiss me again”, why was she even arguing? She wanted to do it again and he was asking her to do it. Soshe held on is shoulders, stood on her tiptoes again and took his lips on hers.

This time his hands moved to touch her waist. Firstly, just touching it carefully, as he was knowing something new, then he held it firmly. From that point on it felt like the act had been a trigger to him becoming bolder cause something switched inside of him. His tongue pressed against her bottom lip, begging for access. She let him, opening her mouth and sliding her own tongue into his mouth. He also pulled her closer, feeling her chest against his, so he could grab her thighs and lift her body. She wrapped her legs around his torso, and he walked till her back hit a rock which was the rail of the stair. He put her sitting on the rock and moved his lips to her neck. “Sunghoon…”, she whined when she felt his lips trailing down her body “If you want me to stop, just tell me” “... don't stop”. But he pulled away, she looked confused ”Why did you stop?”, he smirked, “How do you want me to do this?”, he said while he untied the knot of his gym shorts, she smirked too, “I want you to fuck me from behind” “I like from behind” “Really?” “Yeah, bet your ass looks even better without cloth blocking the view”, she laughed, then she jumped off the rock and leaned on it, with her ass turned to Sunghoon. He held the elastic of her gym leggings and took it off her, when he was done, he took a step back to appreciate the view.

“Damn”, he tilted his head to take a look at it from other angles “Can I bite it? I mean, it is asking for it”, she laughed “No!I want to swim when we get in the waterfall” “So can I slap it?” “Yes. But not hard at the point it gets your handprint on it”, he laughed with the idea “Ok”, then he aligned his dick with her entrance, “Are you ready for me?” “Yes, please”, he saw her clenching as she thought about him getting into her, which made him even more hard. Without any more aldo, he started to slowly get inside of her, trying to hold himself back from doing all at once. He groaned when he felt her clenching around him as he got even deeper till he got to her cervix. “If you keep doing it I’m coming without even have the chance of actually fucking you” “Doing what?”, she squeezed around him of purpose “This?”, she faked innocence. “I really mean it. I’m going to fill you with all my cum if you do this again”, she laughed, mischeviously, but she stopped, she didn’t want to ruin everything “Ok, I won’t do this on purpose again” “Good. I’ll start moving now” “Thank God”.

Sunghoon started to thrust, the first 2 he did slowly, but after this he couldn’t hold himself back anymore he had to go faster. She wasn’t complaining cause she was as much needy as he was. Soon, they became 2 moan messes, the erotic sounds echoing in the forest, scaring away any form of life who dared to interrupt them. Sunghoon had his head back, and his eyes shut, cause of the electricity that ran down his whole body. He looked at her, she had her knuckles turning white of gripping so hard on the rock. He smirked before placing his hand on her left cheek, “Your skin is so light” “W-what?” “It would look good on red tones”, she smirked, she knew what was coming next “I-I agree...”, she said in between the moans.

He lifted his palm, then smacked it on her ass, the sound of the slap mixed with her whine made Hoin go wild, she clenched around him “Told you not to do it” “It wasn't’ on purpose” “I don’t believe you”, he smacked her ass in the same spot as before, she whined again. “I want you to say my name”, he smacked it once more, but not too hard, he didn’t want to hurt her. She moaned, “Hoon…” “Yes”, he placed his hand where he smacked and massaged the area. It didn’t take longer for them to cum on each other. Hoon leaned over her to hold on the rock and avoid falling, “I didn’t think of it when you asked for doing some cardio today”, he laughed “You felt so good”, he kissed her face, “But we should get going if we want to reach the waterfall” “Yes”, they straightened up and cleaned themselves with a towel she bought for the water.

They continued the trail with hands attached, “Do you want to hear something funny?” “Sure” “You won the competition but I got what I wanted anyway” “What?!” “If I have won, I would have asked for a kiss” “No!” “Yes”, she laughed “I’m glad we have our minds aligned” “Feels like we share the same braincells”, they laughed. She let go of his hand “What’s wrong?” “Look!”, she pointed out to Heeseung and Jake “There you are!” “Finally!”, the other 2 complained “You took forever to get here” “We got stuck on the stair” “We did it so fast” “Well, we are not you” “Ok, but why are we here arguing over a damn stair while we could be swimming?” “She has a point” “So let’s go!”, she took her gym clothes, revealing her body covered by the bikini. “Gentlemen, please watch me while I do a backflip”, the 3 men watched her prepare to jump on the waterfall. “Do you guys think you can do a backflip too?”, Sunghoon looked at Heeseung and Jake and noticed they were looking at her ass, but he didn’t get jealous at all, he had seen it first.

[xomakara]

Crossing Boundaries

(re-posting from my old account seulrinnie-rinrin/xomakara-secondary)

SUMMARY | You are older than Wooyoung by two years and is best friends with his older brother, so you always saw Wooyoung as a younger brother. But Wooyoung wants to be so much more than a younger brother. PAIRING | Wooyoung x Reader GENRE/CONTENT | non-idol!Wooyoung, older!Reader, non-idol au, romance, fluff, smut, oral sex, fingering, vaginal sex WARNINGS | A slightly older reader and younger man?? RATING | NSFW, explicit, mature, 18+ LENGTH | 8,033 words TAGLIST | — NETWORKS | AUTHOR’S NOTE | The noona in me is happy and glad to write this. Maybe the filthiest I ever wrote lol. Couldn’t exactly push to 10k but 8k words is still good enough lol

"What's the occasion?" Wooyoung looks at you sprawled out on his bed.

"No occasion. Just needed someone to talk to." You replied after making yourself comfortable. "Your brother is goofing off who knows where and you're the only person that's here in Seoul. I have nothing better to do."

"Did you get dumped?" Wooyoung asked, watching your face. "Again?"

"I dumped him this time!" You say, deciding to let some of the frustration out. "My god he really has no fucking clue what he wants. He likes me, but thinks I'm not good enough for him? How many times do I have to hear that idiot saying those things before it finally sinks into his head that it's wrong?! I deserve someone that can give me the proper love and care! Not someone that doesn't even know how to express his feelings properly or treat me right!"

Wooyoung could be that man. Be the man that gives you proper love and care.

But he knows that you don't think of him in that way. You only see him as a little brother since you're his older brother's best friend. He didn't even care that you were older than him by two years. To him, age was just a number. So to him, there wasn't any reason why he shouldn't have fallen in love with you. You're the girl he wanted most when he was young, but never got because he was too scared to make a move on you.

"The guy is an idiot if he can't see how perfect you are for him." Wooyoung says, leaning back against his desk chair.

"Ugh, maybe I should stop dating people." You sigh. "Maybe I should stick to just reading books from now on. No dating needed at all. Reading about romance in a book is much easier and much less painful."

"Come on, noona. There are other men that would gladly date you." Wooyoung says.

"Are your roommates single?" You turned your head to look at him.

"Why?" He raised an eyebrow at you. “Thought you just said that you’re going to stop dating.”

"I need to find a really handsome guy." You said. “Just so I can get back at that stupid bastard and rub it in his face.”

"Sorry Y/N-noona," Wooyoung shrugged. "But both Hongjoong-hyung and Jongho have girlfriends. And I'm pretty sure my other friends are taken too."

"Fuck. Why do all the pretty men have to be taken?" You complained, burying your face into Wooyoung's pillow. "Even your brother isn't single."

"Like you'd ever date your best friend." Wooyoung snorted, earning himself a glare from you.

"I might have thought about it before." You admitted, returning a snort of your own. "You know there was a time where every girl wanted your brother back in high school."

"Even you?" He laughed, pinching your cheeks. "So why didn't you go after him then?"

"Because your brother only saw me as his best friend." You sighed. "It took him a long time before he realized that I was actually attracted to him. And then he rejected me. And now we laugh about it whenever we meet up together."

"And there starts your origin story of getting heartbroken and dumped every time. Every story will start with Y/N going out with a cute guy, crushing on them, and being rejected." Wooyoung mused.

"Mhm." You agreed. "One day though. One day, everything will work out for me."

"Keep dreaming." Wooyoung teased.

"Fine, fine. It won't happen soon though. Maybe I'll die alone and unfulfilled." You groaned. "You're such a buzzkill, Wooyoung."

"But the world would be dull without me." Wooyoung replied with a laugh.

You sat up in his bed, running a hand through your hair. "Let's go out and drink. I want to forget about all this shit."

"Hm?" Wooyoung raised an eyebrow.

"Drink with me." You said, standing up and taking a step towards him.

"Alright, alright." Wooyoung relented. "Where do you want to go?"

"A bar nearby." You answered, feeling more excited than usual. "Something new, I've been to the same places over and over again."

"Alright." Wooyoung nods. "But don't be picking up random guys there! I'm not gonna deal with some drunk douchebag that's trying to get in your pants. If they try something I swear to god I'll-"

"Ohhh, is my Wooyoungie jealous already?" You asked with a chuckle. "Don't worry, this noona here won't be picking up any guys. Just come out with me and drink with me. You can even invite your roommates or friends. I don't care as long as I have a few drinks in me."

"Noona, you sure?" He eyed you suspiciously. "You're not just saying that to make me feel good, are you?"

"I'm positive." You assured him. "After breaking up with that idiot, I don't even want to deal with picking up guys anymore. That's the least of my worries. Now please come drink with me. Please?"

"Alright." Wooyoung said slowly. "I guess I'll go along with you this one time."

"Thank you!" You jumped up and down excitedly. "That's all I wanted to hear! You're the best Wooyoungie."

"Yeah, yeah." Wooyoung waved you away. "Let's go get drunk."

Wooyoung watched as you laughed at something Yunho was saying to you and he couldn't help but stare at the way your lips moved, forming each word and speaking with such confidence. He had seen you laughing before but never like this. Your eyes shone bright and it seemed like the whole room lit up when you did. Seeing you smile genuinely made him happy and he wished he could have frozen that moment right there.

"You like her." San suddenly stated, shocking him out of his daze.

"What?" Wooyoung asked, looking up at the person beside him.

"Y/N-noona." San repeated, narrowing his eyes. "The way you looked at her the last time we went out drinking, I knew it. You like her. A lot."

"You're delusional." Wooyoung shook his head. "She's my older brother's best friend. She's completely off limits."

"Off limits or not, you still like her." San said. "It's okay, you can admit it."

"There's nothing to admit." Wooyoung muttered, looking back at you and smiling slightly. "Nothing to tell anyone."

"Let me guess...She see's you as a little brother, huh? Is that it?" San gave him a disbelieving look.

"Stop it." Wooyoung sighed. "San, you're annoying me."

"Okay, okay." San said with a laugh. "I'll stop talking about your precious noona."

"Great." Wooyoung rolled his eyes before gesturing to you and Yunho. "Now that we have that settled, I think it's time for me to break up whatever is going on over there."

Your laughter was angelic to his ears. The sound calmed him and the sight of your genuine happiness warmed his heart. All he wanted to do was stay there forever, basking in the bliss that is your smile. How lucky his brother was to have you as a friend. What a treasure it was to have you around.

He had never felt this way about another woman. When he first met you back in elementary school, he didn't pay attention to you because you were a tomboy. But when you entered middle school and started to become more feminine, he started noticing you more and found himself admiring the confidence you carried in yourself. Whenever he hung out with you, he always felt relaxed and refreshed. He never had trouble talking to you and he loved hearing your stories. They were entertaining and very interesting.

In all honesty, he didn't think he'd fall in love with you, but once he realized he had feelings for you, it became impossible to deny it.

Ever since he realized his feelings for you, he's tried so hard to keep himself at a distance, because he didn't want to scare you away with his crush. He didn't want to force you to like him, so he continued acting normal around you, not giving you the chance to realize that he liked you. He figured that if you never knew how he felt about you, it would just give him an excuse to keep your friendship alive. To be close to you. To see your smile and listen to your voice. He enjoyed spending time with you. He liked talking to you.

When he had a chance to get closer to you, he always decided against it, thinking it was a bad idea. After all, you were his older brother's friend.

"Noona, you doing good?" Wooyoung asked you, resting a hand on your shoulder.

"Just a little buzzed, that's all." You managed to say without slurring your words. "Yunho and Mingi has been keeping an eye on me."

"Oh yeah?" Wooyoung grinned. "You're not picking them up, are you?"

"Nooooo~" You laughed, shooing him away playfully. "I said that I wasn't going to pick up guys and I mean it!"

"You're drunk aren't you? How many drinks have you had, noona?" Wooyoung asked, raising an eyebrow at you.

"Seven." You announced proudly. "Three beers and four shots."

"You really need to slow down." Wooyoung frowned, shaking his head.

"How about you let me buy you a beer, so you can drink with me?" You suggested.

"I refuse." Wooyoung refused to budge.

"How about you buy me a few drinks?" You raised your eyebrows at him.

"No." Wooyoung shook his head firmly.

"How about you take me home?" You suggested, batting your eyelashes at him.

Wooyoung had to take deep breaths to calm himself down at that statement. Of course he wanted to take you home. He wanted to take you home, kiss you senseless, bend you over the table, fuck you - nonono, he couldn't think like that! Not with you as his older brother's friend! It was wrong to have these thoughts. It was wrong to want this. This can never happen.

"Alright, alright." Wooyoung said, reaching for his wallet and pulling out money. "I’ll buy you some more drinks."

“Yay!” You happily clapped your hands, accepting the money from him and quickly getting up. You grabbed Wooyoung's hand, tugging him along behind you. "Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go! Shots! Shots! Shots!”

Wooyoung let you drag him towards the bar where a few of his friends were hanging out. You were practically pulling him by his arm. Luckily, none of them minded. In fact, everyone was amused by the situation. Some were outright staring at you and chuckling. You dragged Wooyoung to the counter, pointing at bottles and making drunken demands while grabbing the bartender's attention. After a few minutes of confusion and waiting, you finally got your drinks. You held the bottle in your hands, lifting it to your mouth. You finished the whole thing before putting the bottle back on the counter.

"Gimme another one." You demanded, putting your arm around Wooyoung's waist.

"Noona." Wooyoung grumbled, placing his hands on your shoulder. “I’m taking you home. You’re drunk.”

“Nooo~~~” You whined, pouting. “Come onnnn.”

Wooyoung sighed and reluctantly handed the bartender more money. “Just one more, please.” He ordered.

As soon as he walked back to you, you wrapped your arms around his neck and planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." You whispered, leaning into him.

“Shit…” Wooyoung breathed under his breath. He needed to end this now before things got out of control. He couldn't handle it, the way your face lit up, the way you leaned into him, the sweet smell of alcohol on your skin, your breath becoming heavy as you lean into him, the way your body presses against him…

He should've listened to his gut and told you to go home. Right now, his brain was screaming at him to move away from you and put space between the two of you, but his feet weren't listening to him. His body kept moving forward, like a magnet towards yours.

"Umm...yeah." He mumbled awkwardly. “We better get you home.”

"But..." You started.

"Noona." Wooyoung shook his head. "It's late and I'm not gonna let you drive home. Besides, I'm pretty sure your parents or even your sister won't be happy to find out that you came here alone and drank."

"You're probably right." You nodded before pouting. It took Wooyoung all his strength to not throw you over his shoulder. "You're still a buzzkiller."

“I know, I know. Let’s get you home.” Wooyoung agreed.

After saying your goodbyes to the rest of the group, Wooyoung guided you to the car. On the way to your house, you were almost asleep in the passenger seat. Wooyoung had to carry you to the door and place you inside the house. He carried you to your bedroom and placed you gently on the bed. You instantly fell asleep. He turned off the lights and left you sleeping peacefully.

After sending a quick message to your sister to let her know that you were home, Wooyoung left your house to go home. He was still unsettled and distracted by the thought of being near you. He hadn't gotten the chance to ask you if you had enjoyed the night. If you liked him. Maybe you were just playing along with him to tease him. He'd have to wait until tomorrow to find out.

You woke up with the worst hangover in history. You couldn't even remember what happened yesterday. Everything seemed blurry and surreal. Your head hurt, you felt nauseous and you wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep. But you also wanted to know why you were in your bed. You groaned and lifted your head up, attempting to sit up, only to hit your head back on the pillow.

"Son of a bitch." You swore angrily. "Fuck…"

Your phone rang and you answered it. "You have five minutes to tell me what the fuck you want or I'm hanging up."

You heard Wooyoung laugh on the other end. "Bad hangover, noona?"

"What did I do last night?" You groaned, wincing in pain.

"You were having fun, I guess." Wooyoung shrugged. "You drank too much, that's for sure."

"Did I pass out somewhere?" You asked curiously.

"No but you nearly fell asleep in my car." Wooyoung said. "I brought you home though."

"Thanks for saving my ass." You chuckled.

"Don't mention it." Wooyoung replied. "I'd do anything for you, noona."

"Anything?" You asked with a teasing tone.

"Oh no. What's going on in that head of yours?" Wooyoung joked.

"Coffeeeeee pleaseeee." You whined into the phone. "Now."

"Yeah, okay. Ten minutes. Go shower or something while you wait." Wooyoung chuckled.

After hanging up, you laid back down on your bed and closed your eyes. You felt like shit and Wooyoung was right, you did drink too much. You should've stopped after three beers, but you wanted to keep drinking. And when someone buys you more alcohol, it becomes really easy to continue drinking, even though you feel like shit.

When you looked at yourself in the mirror, you barely recognized yourself. Your hair was messed up, there were smudges of mascara and eyeliner around your eyes, your lips were chapped and there was dried saliva stuck on your teeth. You look disgusting and definitely not presentable. As much as you hated to admit it, you needed a shower. Badly.

You went to the bathroom and hopped into the shower. The hot water helped ease some of your headache, but didn't make the hungover feeling any better. You took your time washing your hair, shampooing and conditioning it. You massaged your scalp, closing your eyes and letting out a small moan of pleasure as the warm water poured onto your skin.

After showering, you threw on some clean sweats and a t-shirt. Then you made your way downstairs. You found Wooyoung talking to Aimee, your younger sister, in the kitchen. They were laughing at something.

"Where's my coffee, Wooyoungie?" You called out, walking towards them.

"Here, you drunk." Wooyoung slid the coffee cup to you as you settled yourself on the stool. "Do you feel any better?"

"I feel like shit." You mumbled, resting your head on the countertop.

"Awhh." Wooyoung pouted, trying to hide his smile.

"Who told you to drink so much, eonni?" Your younger sister shook her head. "Let me guess. Jaehyun broke up with you?"

"I broke up with him." You retorted.

"And you needed a big, stiff drink." Aimee smirked.

"You have no idea how true that is." You laughed.

"Hey, good riddance. That relationship was doomed to fail anyway." Aimee stated. "While I'm happy that you dumped him, I'm a bit sad because Jaehyun was such a gorgeous man."

"Hey, I'm a gorgeous man!" Wooyoung pointed at himself.

Aimee raised her eyebrows. "Keep telling yourself that, Wooyoung."

"I am gorgeous." Wooyoung proclaimed.

"Whatever, loser." Aimee rolled her eyes.

You couldn't help but think that Wooyoung and your sister looked cute together. They were the same age and they always seemed to get along well whenever they spent time together. It wasn't surprising to see that they both found each other attractive, despite their differences in appearance. Their personality and sense of humor made up for it.

A part of you wanted someone as caring and funny as Wooyoung in your life, but then again, your luck in men wasn't great and you never found anyone who could treat you right. It didn't stop you from dreaming though. One day, you promised yourself, you would meet someone and he would change your mind about love and relationships. You wouldn't settle anymore, you would wait for the right guy to come along.

"Well, I hope you feel better." Wooyoung spoke up, breaking you out of your thoughts. "Do you have any plans for the day?"

"Nothing much. Probably go hang out with your brother or something. But I'm kind of tired and want to go back to sleep." You admitted, rubbing your temples.

"Why don't you just stay in today?" Aimee suggested. "I have to head to the office today anyway so I'll pick up dinner after I get off."

"Are you sure?" You asked, tilting your head.

"Yeah, it's fine." Aimee smiled. "Plus, I'd rather have a girls night with my older sister."

"I'm not included?" Wooyoung pouted.

Aimee rolled her eyes. "You're not a girl, you weirdo." She shook her head. "Besides, don't you have to go or something? Don't you have work?"

"Of course, what do you take me for?" Wooyoung laughed, shaking his head.

"Go away, you two." You moaned, head on the countertop. "Your yapping isn't helping my hangover."

Wooyoung grinned widely. "How dare you."

You reached for the coffee and gulped it down quickly. When you finished, you yawned. "I'm gonna crash now." You mumbled. "Thanks for everything, Wooyoungie. Now go to work, make that money."

"Anytime, noona." Wooyoung gave you a hug before leaving the room.

As soon as he was gone, Aimee pulled you into a tight hug. "Good job dumping Jaehyun." She whispered into your ear. "I'm so proud of you, sis."

"He deserves it." You sighed. "How can someone say they like you but then say you're not good enough for him? What kind of bullshit is that?"

"You're right." Aimee nodded. "You deserve someone better."

You hugged your sister back tightly. "Do you have any single friends? Or ex-boyfriends?" You asked hopefully.

"No eonni, I don't." Aimee laughed. "But you and I both know someone who's single."

"Who?" You inquired.

"Wooyoung, duhhhh." Aimee teased.

"Wooyoung?" You repeated, slightly taken aback. "Our Wooyoung? The Wooyoung who just left our house? The cutie-pie Wooyoung who's been our childhood friend for years? That Wooyoung?"

"That Wooyoung." Aimee giggled.

"Weird." You frowned. "I mean…of course he's single. But why? He's such a great catch."

"Maybe he's waiting for the perfect girl." Aimee suggested.

"I don't believe that for one second." You shook your head. "But if he is, I'm sure he'll meet her soon."

"Or maybe he already has." Aimee mused, a smile on her face. "Maybe he's already found that special one and she just doesn't know it yet."

"Mhmm." You hummed in agreement.

"Let's hope he doesn't have to wait too long." Your sister shook her head and grabbed her purse, making her way to the front door. "I'm heading to work now. I'll see you later, okay eonni?"

"Sure thing." You waved goodbye to her.

"Text me what you want for dinner." She instructed and you replied with a thumbs up.

You watched as your sister left the house, shutting the door behind her. You made your way to the couch and sunk into the cushions, curling up into a ball. You closed your eyes and let out a sigh, wondering if your day would get any better.

For reasons unknown, you woke up feeling incredibly horny. You had no idea why this would be happening. You haven't gotten laid in quite a few months and when you were still with Jaehyun, the both of you never even had sex. So it was extremely strange to wake up feeling this way.

Okay maybe it was that steamy movie you watched while you were indisposed on the couch. Maybe watching the couple undress and finally having sex made you yearn for some action of your own.

It had to be. Yeah.

You glanced at the clock. It was only noon and you had an entire day ahead of you. Grabbing your phone, you noticed the text messages from Wooyoung that you missed from a few hours ago. Instead of replying to him, you just decided to call him.

"Noona?" Wooyoung greeted, answering the phone immediately. "You good?"

"Yeah, I just woke up again." You huffed. "Are you done with work?"

"Yeah, I'm heading over to your place right now."

"Why?" You questioned, sitting upright. "It's only noon."

"Because you didn't answer Aimee's calls or texts so she got worried." Wooyoung explained. "I felt bad and offered to check on you. Are you okay, noona?"

"How far are you?"

"Pulling up right now. I'm hanging up."

In a few seconds, you heard the keypad to your front door opening and Wooyoung walked inside, taking his shoes off at the entrance. God, he looked so handsome standing there with his slightly disheveled hair, his crisp white shirt and jeans combo making him look casual but still appealing.

You wondered what his body looked like under his clothes and suddenly your imagination started to run wild. Nonono, you couldn't think like that. He was your best friend's younger brother! No matter how attracted you were to him, he wasn't someone you should be sleeping with. You liked him like a little brother and nothing else.

At least, you hoped so.

You pushed the unwanted thoughts out of your mind and smiled as Wooyoung made his way over to you. "Are you okay?" He asked, crouching beside you. "Hangover still bad?"

"Not too bad." You shook your head. "Did you bring me anything?"

"Yeah, here." Wooyoung handed you a bottle of water and some ibuprofen pills. "Take these. You'll feel better in no time."

"Thanks, Wooyoung." You sighed, leaning against him. "How was work?"

"It went pretty well. Hongjoong told me to go home. When your sister called me, he told me to just leave and take care of you."

You nodded. "Sounds like a good friend."

"Definitely." Wooyoung chuckled. "Do you need anything else?"

"I do but I'm not sure if it's something you could help me with." You muttered.

"What's up?" Wooyoung tilted his head. "You could tell me."

You shook your head, your cheeks slightly heating up. "Nononono, you don't need to-"

"Shhh…" Wooyoung placed a finger on your lips, silencing you instantly. "Look, I won't judge you, noona. Whatever you want, I'll try my best to give it to you."

"That's not-"

"Just relax and talk to me." Wooyoung said softly. "Please?"

You looked up at him and thought for a moment. What exactly did you want from him? Would asking him to pleasure you turn things between you and him sexual? Would he actually agree to do it? Did you really want to ask him?

All these questions raced through your mind and you bit your lip nervously. In the end, you decided to throw caution to the wind and see where this would lead you. If it ended badly, you could always cut ties with Wooyoung and go back to being just best friends.

Hopefully.

"Don't judge me okay? Please don't hate me." You breathed, looking away from Wooyoung and staring at the ground. "This might sound weird and I'm sorry if it does."

"I won't hate you, noona." Wooyoung assured you. "Whatever you need, just ask me."

The silence stretched on until you began to wonder if Wooyoung was going to speak. Then he raised an eyebrow at you and nodded once. He leaned forward slightly, giving you space to talk.

"Well...I woke up feeling...fuck, this is embarrassing to say." You huffed. "So here goes."

You took a deep breath and swallowed, telling yourself to just spit it out. You took another deep breath and braced yourself for what you were about to say.

"I..." You paused for a few moments, trying to find the right words to say. "I've been horny all morning. And I've never wanted someone so badly in my life."

Wooyoung gaped at you for a moment before covering his mouth with his hand, stifling his laughter. You stared at him in shock, your face turning bright red. Why did you just admit that? Of course he was gonna laugh. Why did you just open up to him?

"See? I knew it sounded weird!" You buried your face in your hands in embarrassment. "And now I've embarrassed myself even more."

"Calm down, noona." Wooyoung chuckled. "There's no need to be embarrassed."

You felt his hands softly gripping your thigh, stroking your skin lightly. You looked down at him and bit your lower lip anxiously. You weren't sure if he meant what he was doing as comforting or sexual.

"Sorry, I just..." You huffed, shaking your head. "I shouldn't be saying this. I shouldn't be thinking about this."

"I know, but-"

"-I'm just saying." You cut him off. "I'm not usually like this. Like, ever. And I can't believe I'm talking to you about this."

"Tell me what you want, noona." Wooyoung gently coaxed, stroking your thighs once more. "Tell me, show me how to please you."

You bit your lip nervously, feeling Wooyoung's eyes fixated on yours. You stared back at him, unsure of what to say. At the same time, you also felt empowered knowing that you could trust him with this. After all, you were opening up to him because you wanted him to know what you wanted. Right?

Right?

You gulped. "Fuck, I can't believe I'm doing this. Wooyoung..."

"Hmm? Tell me, noona." Wooyoung spoke softly, his voice somehow calming you down. "Show me how you want me to pleasure you."

"Wooyoung..." You whimpered, wanting him to kiss you but also not wanting to risk kissing him. Kissing him would make things...complicated.

"...say it. Just say it." Wooyoung repeated, running his fingers up and down your thigh. "Say whatever you want. Don't be afraid. Say it out loud."

You bit your lower lip and furrowed your brows. Fuck it all. You were just gonna go for it. You were just gonna fuck around with Wooyoung and see where this would take you. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

You grabbed his hand and placed it under your sweatpants, letting him fondle your already moist pussy through your underwear. "Fuck, I need you to finger me, eat me out. Touch me, make me come."

"Let's get rid of your sweatpants first." He let out a small chuckle. "Let's do this properly."

You let out a small moan as you felt him tug on your sweatpants, pushing them down below your hips. Your panties came next and after that, you were completely naked from the waist down. On his knees, he grabbed your hips and pulled you to sit on the edge of the couch cushions, positioning himself directly in front of you.

"Oh my god, Wooyoung..." You gasped, feeling his lips trailing small kisses up your thighs. You reached down and wrapped your fingers around his hair, encouraging him to continue.

"Tell me, noona." He asked softly, planting small kisses on your inner thighs. "What do you want?"

By no means was Wooyoung inexperienced when it came to sex. He'd gone out with quite a few women, which gave him plenty of experience. But the fact that he wanted you to tell him what to do made you feel empowered. Not only was he giving you what you wanted, he was listening to you as well. And you wanted him to know that you enjoyed having him do those things to you.

Your breathing quickened as Wooyoung continued to explore your body, kissing and licking along the sides of your thighs, brushing your folds with his tongue. You moaned as he trailed kisses along your inner thigh and began teasing your clit with his tongue. He was fucking amazing at it, using his tongue to flick the sensitive nub. With every pass, your moans grew louder and you gripped his hair tighter, encouraging him to do even more.

"Fuck..." You whispered hoarsely. "Please don't stop, Wooyoung."

Wooyoung replied with a smile. "Keep talking, noona. I want to hear what you're saying. Want to know if you're feeling good."

He continued to lick and suck on your clit while simultaneously teasing your hole with his tongue, slowly drawing your arousal to its peak. You kept your hands around his head, tugging at his hair and moaning loudly as he kept pleasuring you. His fingers ran through your wetness and brought them back to his mouth, sucking and licking them clean.

Fuck, you wanted his fingers in your mouth. Wanted to lick them, suck them dry.

As if reading your mind, he lifted his fingers to your lips. "Noona, suck my fingers." He ordered.

Reluctantly, you parted your lips and closed your teeth around his digits. You sucked hard, pulling at his fingers with your mouth. He moaned in delight and tightened his grip on your hips, guiding his fingers back to your pussy.

You wiggled beneath him, letting him push one finger inside of you. The sensation of his digits stretching your insides almost made you cry out. He then inserted a second finger, adding a third one later on. His mouth never left your pussy, though, continuing to lick you mercilessly as he slid his fingers in and out of you. Every thrust was like fire coursing through your body. It was too much and you quickly began panting heavily. You could barely think straight anymore, everything but him, his touch, his hot breath on your pussy.

His tongue was magic and you could feel your orgasm building rapidly. "Oh shit...Wooyoung, oh my god."

"Are you close, noona?" He asked you in between licks.

You whimpered, unable to form any words. All you wanted was to scream, yell out, tell him to hurry the fuck up and make you come. "Oh god...I...I can't...stop...oh god..."

Wooyoung increased his pace, sucking on your clit and rubbing his fingers against your walls. You couldn't help it. Soon enough, your orgasm hit you like a truck.

Your entire body convulsed as waves of pleasure washed over you. Your body tensed as your juices coated Wooyoung's fingers and his lips. And then you collapsed back onto the couch, gasping for air. You could feel your body shaking from your orgasm and Wooyoung grinned proudly at you.

When your heartbeat returned to normal, you sat up and patted Wooyoung on the cheek. "Wow, Wooyoung. That was incredible."

"Did I do good, noona? Are you happy?" He smiled sweetly at you, patting his hand against your ass playfully.

"Mhm, I loved it." You replied, blushing. "Thank you for indulging me."

"I'll do anything you want, noona." Wooyoung assured you, wrapping his arms around you. "Whenever you want."

"That's good to know." You smiled, leaning into him. "So, wanna keep fooling around some more?"

"Is that what you want?" He asked you with a smirk. "To keep fooling around?"

"Hell yeah." You laughed. "Can we?"

"Anything for you, noona." He grinned.

The rest of the afternoon passed in a flurry of kissing. Eventually, you two had moved into the bedroom, the rest of your clothes strewn across the floor. Wooyoung's shirt and jeans were tossed to the side of the bed and you noticed that he was only wearing boxers. You stared at his abs, tracing your fingers along the line of his stomach muscles.

You kissed him deeply, knowing that kissing him was going to get complicated. But you didn't care. Who cares if things got complicated. You'll reach that hurdle eventually anyway. Right?

"My turn." You murmured against his lips. He sat on the edge of the bed as you dropped to your knees in front of him. "I wanna taste you, Wooyoung."

He moaned at your words, reaching down and running his hands through your hair. "You don't have to do this for me, noona..."

"But I want to. Please, Wooyoung?" You pleaded with him, licking your lips seductively. "Please let me taste you."

"You're not drunk, are you?" He teased, chuckling slightly.

You laughed as well, biting your bottom lip. "Nope, just trying to cure a hangover."

Wooyoung smirked. "Then taste me whenever you want, noona."

You wasted no time in sucking on his erection, wrapping your lips around him and sliding him deep into your throat. He groaned in pleasure, holding onto your hair tightly. You liked the rough feeling of his hands on your hair, like you belonged there, sucking him off.

With your free hand, you squeezed his balls gently, massaging them with your thumb. A moan escaped his lips as you slowly bobbed your head up and down, taking him deeper each time until his tip hit the back of your throat. You looked up at him and he let out another moan before grabbing onto your hair once again.

You hummed with satisfaction, knowing that he liked what you were doing to him. As you licked and sucked on his dick, you ran your fingers along his shaft, lightly playing with his sack and stroking his head. It wasn't long before he was pushing his hips up, forcing his cock further down your throat. This excited you and you held his cock tight, not wanting him to pull away.

"You're such a good girl." He praised you.

You giggled. "Good girls are rewarded."

Wooyoung chuckled. "Alright then, good girl. Be rewarded."

As soon as he said that, you felt his warm seed coat your throat. You gulped a little at the feeling of him coming down your throat and used your hands to massage his shaft and testicles, making sure to take every last drop of cum out of him. When he was finished, he collapsed onto the bed, breathing heavily. You crawled up next to him, placing soft kisses on his chest and shoulders.

You weren't satisfied yet. So you proceeded to start sucking on his nipples, causing him to moan in pleasure. "I want more, Wooyoung." You breathed.

"How much more?" He asked you teasingly. “You're so insatiable, aren't you?”

"You've got all day to please me." You responded slyly. "All night."

Wooyoung chuckled as you straddled him, grinding your wet pussy against his cock. "Hmm...Sounds tempting, noona."

"Will you satisfy me?" You asked him, watching as his eyes darkened with lust.

"Of course." He growled, pulling you towards him as he sat up. His hands wandered over your soft skin. "Whatever you want, I'll give it to you."

His words made you shiver. You knew exactly what you wanted and now you were going to get it. And Wooyoung was going to give it to you. You could feel yourself growing moist at the thought of his big cock filling you.

"What would you like, noona?" He asked you seriously. "I'll do whatever you want."

"I want you inside me." You kissed him softly on the lips. "Give me your big cock."

"Yes, yes, baby." He groaned as you took his penis into your hands. "Put it in, noona."

You slowly slid him inside of you. "Fuuuck." You gasped. "That feels so good."

"Fuck yeah." Wooyoung moaned, staring into your eyes lovingly. "Feels good, right?"

"Mmhmm." You nodded, pressing your breasts against his chest as he thrust his hips upward, driving himself deeper into you.

You wrapped your legs around his waist, locking your ankles together behind his back. The position felt amazing. You could easily grind your pussy against his dick as he pushed it in and out of you.

"It feels so good, noona." He moaned, resting his forehead against yours.

"Me too." You agreed, your fingers tangling in his hair. "Every inch feels so fucking good."

Wooyoung kissed you deeply, nibbling on your lower lip. "I'm glad, noona." He whispered, nipping on your earlobe. "God, you're beautiful. You're taking me in so well, noona. Feels so damn good."

Your body was starting to heat up again and you moaned when he bit down on your neck. "Ah! Ah!" You yelled out, closing your eyes and clenching around his shaft. "Oh, fuck."

"Tell me, noona." Wooyoung urged, licking your neck. "Say what you need."

"Ohhh, fuck." You cried out, digging your nails into his back. "Wooyoung...mmm..please..."

Wooyoung released your neck and slowly began thrusting his hips up, sliding his cock in and out of you. "Say it, noona." He moaned, lowering his head and suckling your breast. "Say what you want."

You pulled his hair roughly, moaning. "More, please, more..."

"You like this, don't you, noona?" He asked you, chuckling lightly. "Don't worry. I won't stop."

You shook your head, looking into his eyes. "No, please don't stop." You whined. "Just keep fucking me."

He thrust harder, sending shockwaves throughout your body. "I'll fuck you all day and all night, noona. Every single second. No matter when and where you want it, I'll give it to you." He promised you, rocking his hips faster and faster. "I want to feel your tight pussy around my cock. Tighten up around me, noona."

And you did just that. You tightened around his cock and moaned loudly, unable to contain your pleasure. "Oh god, fuck, Wooyoung...that's so good."

You both started moaning louder and louder as your orgasms hit you. And you didn't want it to end. Not now, not ever. And you swore that it wouldn't. You continued to rock your hips back and forth, wanting him to stay buried inside of you forever.

He slowed his thrusts only to position you onto your hands and knees. He grabbed hold of your hips, pushing them back against his waist as he rammed himself into you again.

"Holy shit." He exclaimed, panting heavily. "I can't believe how tight you are."

You whimpered as he gripped your hips tighter. "You're really enjoying this, aren't you?" He mumbled.

He ran a hand along your naked back, the other holding your hip. You closed your eyes and just enjoyed the sensation of being fucked, completely and utterly taken. Your body sagged against the mattress, pushing your ass back towards him and giving him even more access to your pussy. He couldn't get enough of you. You rocked your hips, thrusting back against him, meeting each of his hard thrusts with your own.

"Jesus Christ, noona." Wooyoung cursed under his breath. "This feels so good. So goddamn good."

"Do it, Wooyoung." You panted. "Fill me with your cum. Fill me with your cum."

He leaned forward and kissed and sucked on the back of your neck and shoulder as he thrust his hips up into you, emptying his entire load into your eager pussy. His entire body tensed as he came, the waves of his orgasm radiating through him. With every wave of his climax, you came closer to climaxing again and the feeling was mind-blowing. You'd never felt anything like it. You could feel his hot seed oozing out of your pussy and covering your walls. His cock stayed buried inside of you for a few moments longer before finally slipping out.

You collapsed on the bed, gasping for air as you tried to catch your breath. "Wooyoung...god, Wooyoung..."

He collapsed next to you, running his fingers through your hair. "Baby, you okay?" He asked you, concerned.

"Yeah, I'm fine." You nodded, grinning happily. "Didn't expect you to cum three times though."

"I didn't expect you to cum three times either." He smiled.

"Yeah, now I'm exhausted." You sighed.

"It's alright, baby. You can rest if you want." He assured you. "I've got you."

"Okay." You nodded, snuggling up close to him.

You quickly fell asleep in his arms, listening to his steady heartbeat.

The moonlight shone through the curtains and you groggily opened your eyes. For a brief moment, you thought you heard something but shook your head. No, there wasn't anyone else in the room. Only you and Wooyoung.

You yawned, looking down at Wooyoung who was lying beside you. A blanket covered both of your bodies and he snored peacefully against your chest.

You went and did it. You fucked your best friend's younger brother. Well, sort of. More like he fucked you but still.

But you didn't regret it. In fact, it was one of the best nights of your life. You didn't know why but something about it felt natural.

"Noona..." Wooyoung mumbled against your skin, interrupting your thoughts.

You glanced down at him, feeling his soft lips on your neck. He was facing away from you, sleeping soundly. Your heart fluttered as you brushed your fingertips across his back. Oh my god, you thought. You really love this man. You loved him way more than you should have.

Maybe you'd been in love with him this whole time and just now noticed it. Maybe he was attracted to you as well but chose not to admit it. Or maybe you're delusional. It was possible.

Whatever the case, you couldn't deny the strong connection you shared with Wooyoung. Whether you ended up dating each other or not, you knew you wouldn't regret tonight.

At least, not yet.

With a sigh, you tucked a stray strand of hair behind his ear. You looked at him again, feeling yourself growing warmer.

He was perfect. Asleep or awake, the boy was gorgeous.

"Wooyoung?"

"Hmm?" He sleepily moaned, shifting slightly in your embrace.

"Are you still sleeping?" You asked, worried. "Shouldn't you be heading home?"

"It's late." He mumbled, snuggling closer to your body and closing his eyes. "And I feel comfortable here. Just let me spend the night."

"What if my sister comes home?" You frowned. "Do you want her to catch us in bed together?"

"She won't. She told me earlier that she was going to her boyfriend's when I offered to take care of you." He chuckled lightly.

You ran your fingers through his hair. "And you didn't bother to tell me this?"

"If I did, you would have told me to go home. We wouldn't be having this conversation right now." He sighed, cupping your face. "Let's stay like this, okay? At least until morning."

"Fine." You huffed, wrapping your arms around him. "I'm not exactly complaining."

"Good." Wooyoung kissed your forehead before pressing his lips to yours gently.

"Wooyoung, what are we now? Because our relationship has definitely changed after today." You mused, tracing the curve of his jawline with your fingertip.

"We're more than just friends now." He said lightly, running his fingers down your arm. "There's nothing stopping us from dating now. You know this, right? We're both adults. What's stopping us?"

What was stopping you? Other than that tiny voice in the back of your head. You weren't ready to give up the friendship you shared with Wooyoung just yet. Dating him would complicate things way too much. You weren't ready to deal with a breakup or hurting him.

"Y/N," He called out and you couldn't help but bite your lower lip. That was the first time he called you by your name and not noona. "I want to be with you. I don't want to hide anything from you anymore. I want you to know everything about me. I want you to see me and not see just a kid that I used to be."

"Wooyoung..." Your heart thumped wildly in your chest. "How long have you felt this way?"

"Since forever." He sighed, moving to kiss your nose. "I've liked you for as long as I can remember. Always wanting to be near you, watch you, listen to you speak."

"Then why didn't you say anything?" You pouted, lowering your head to look at him.

"Why should I?" He shrugged. "If you don't feel the same way, then I wouldn't want to pressure you into something you aren't comfortable doing."

"Wooyoung, I-"

"-want to date you, Y/N." He cut you off, grinning mischievously at you. "Not just for sex, although I want that too, but because I actually want to date you."

Your eyes widened in surprise. "Huh?"

"I want to take you out. Spend time with you. Be with you. All the time. Not as just friends or you being my older brother's friend. I want to be with you. Love you." He lowered his voice, nibbling on your bottom lip. "Just you."

A surge of warmth flooded your body. "Really?" You asked quietly, smiling shyly at him. "You mean that?"

"Of course, baby.” He laughed lightly. "Who else do you think would say such stupid things to you?"

"Oh, I don't know. Some guy named Wooyoung." You quipped back.

"Ha ha, very funny." He groaned, cupping your cheek before capturing your lips in his.

"Wooyoung..." You whispered against his lips. "You know I love you, right?"

"Since when?" He whispered back, leaning forward and pressing his lips to your neck. "Noona, why haven't you said it to me sooner?"

"Because I wasn't sure if I loved you." You admitted, pulling away slightly to meet his gaze. "But now I am."

"Ahhh..." Wooyoung moaned softly. "I love you too, Y/N."

"Wait, I didn't hear you." You laughed, grabbing hold of his collar. "Say it again."

"Noona...I love you." He repeated himself, gazing at you with adoring eyes. "I love you."

You kissed him deeply, loving how responsive he was to your kisses. His hands tangled in your hair as he deepened the kiss, leaving trails of fire on your lips. Suddenly, you pulled away from him and stared into his eyes. "I love you too, Wooyoung."

"Fuck, Y/N..." He groaned, covering his mouth with his hand. "My hyung is gonna kill me."

"Don't worry about him." You laughed. "He'll be happy that his best friend and his younger brother finally found happiness together."

"You really love me right?" He asked, his lips on your shoulder.

"More than you'll ever know." You replied softly, staring into his dark eyes. "I know I complain about my bad luck in men and that I just wanted someone to give me proper love and care. Guess he was right in front of me, all along."

"I'll make sure to treat you with love and care from now on." Wooyoung promised, pressing another kiss to your neck.

"Promise?" You giggled, biting his bottom lip.

"Absolutely." He smirked at you. "Y/N, you're the only woman I will ever want."

"Hmmm." You hummed, wrapping your legs around his waist. "Then let's just stay in bed all night...hmm?"

"Oh yeah, you're absolutely right." Wooyoung grinned, bringing you even closer to him. "We should stay in bed.”

[ivanttakethis]

top 5 worst ivan mischaracterizations ( aka could you list five worst traits people give him that are just totally wrong) i love to hear people complain but if you don't want to you can ignore this ask have a good day

Anon I am SO glad that you asked!

Ivan is my favorite character in Alien Stage because he’s really complex.

I could talk about him and his characterization/mischaracterization all day and still have more to say after that. Now you’ve given me the perfect opportunity to write a bunch of my thoughts down.

These complaints are in no particular order and are ultimately subjective.

Also, I’m not a Patreon supporter, so I can’t comment on anything that might’ve been confirmed or debunked over there.

Top 5 Worst Ivan Mischaracterizations:

Ivan is an unfeeling and emotionless person

Ivan was trying to kill himself and Till during Round 6

Ivan hates Mizi

Ivan is arrogant

Ivan is violent

This is going to be a long one, so I’m putting everything under the cut. Let’s begin!

1. Ivan is an unfeeling and emotionless person.

I find this mischaracterization to be one of the most frustrating because there is so much evidence to the contrary.

As a child, Ivan is described as someone who struggles to express his emotions and connect with others (imo he’s neurodivergent-coded, but that’s a whole other discussion). But notably we’re not told that he doesn’t experience emotions.

This official art kills me every time I see it because it shows that Ivan knows he’s different from the other children and that it probably makes him stick out and he wants to fit in somehow so he tries to practice/fake it so maybe he won’t be so alone (the imitating behavior is also coded imo).

Beyond all of that, we see plenty of times throughout the series that he feels things, rather intensely even. He’s wistful about the stars and meteor showers and the thought of freedom. He has a curious nature, observing others, wanting to learn more about how they work; how he can emulate them.

And then there’s all of the feelings that well up when it comes to Till. The most obvious is that Ivan loves Till, in his own fucked up way. But there’s more to it.

He wanted attention from Till (maybe the first time he’s ever wanted something in that way). He did everything he could just to get Till to even so much as glance in his direction. All of the fighting, and the bickering, and the instigating was because Ivan craved reciprocation. He grew obsessed.

When Ivan managed to free both himself and Till, he was thrilled!

And when Till let go of Ivan’s hand to return for Mizi, he was very clearly heartbroken.

Ivan felt jealous of Mizi and Sua’s relationship, knowing that he would never have that chance with Till.

Ivan felt lonely because he thought Sua was just like him, only to realize that wasn’t true (because Mizi loved Sua back) and he had no one to relate to.

Also, the entirety of Black Sorrow?? Hello??? He was yearning for more than what he could get. He was resigned to his minuscule place in Till’s life. The song is full of mourning and sadness and grief.

In Round 6, I believe Ivan knew what he was going to do.

He was desperate for anything he could get from Till in his final moments. I think that’s part of why he kissed Till. If his only goal was to deliberately lose, why not skip the kissing and go straight to choking?

Ivan was a dying man overwhelmed with emotion and he desperately wanted Till to look at him, see him, make him feel content for the first (and last) time in his life.

Even if some of these emotions are not necessarily healthy, it shows that Ivan was capable of feeling something.

So… yeah. That’s why I really dislike the emotionless characterization of Ivan. There’s so much depth to his emotions and character, but some people just skim the surface and reduce him down to nothing more than a cold and stoic person.

2. Ivan was trying to kill himself and Till during Round 6.

This one is probably more often a misunderstanding than a mischaracterization of Ivan. I think some people may have seen IvanTill referred to as “toxic” or “obsessive” love when it came to how Ivan felt and behaved around Till and thought Ivan was on some “if I can’t have you, no one can” shit, but that completely ignores the wider context of his character. Ivan was devoted to Till to a fault.

To Ivan, Till was his reason for being. Till was his universe. His god. Till was something to be revered, protected, and worshipped. Ivan couldn’t live without Till. That’s why he sacrificed himself, so he wouldn’t have to continue on in a world without him in it. But he also wanted to protect Till, no matter the cost.

Pretty much everything Ivan did was to protect or care for Till: trying to escape Anakt Garden with him, watching over him after Till was attacked by the aliens in the club, freeing him from his collar over and over and over again, every chance Ivan got.

Nothing about Ivan’s feelings or behaviors toward Till suggests that he would ever harm him, let alone kill him. There’s a reason why when Ivan was “choking” Till it didn’t look like he applied any pressure, there was no struggle for air on Till’s end (even if he had mentally given up, physically there will be some sort of reaction to having your airway compressed), and we don’t see any marks on Till’s neck afterwards.

It didn’t matter what happened to Ivan as a result. Till was the only person who mattered to him.

He would do anything for him. He would quite literally rather die than have anything happen to his god.

Ivan only ever knew how to give all of himself to Till, giving up his life was inevitable.

3. Ivan hates Mizi

I’ve seen this one more so in fan fiction, usually for angsty circumstances, but this just completely sidesteps their canon relationship, which is positive and, dare I say, friendly.

He gave her piggyback rides when they were kids! In the lead up to Alien Stage, we see them chatting and Ivan being pleasant towards her in a sort of “big brother” type way without hiding some sort of darker emotion behind it.

Now, is Ivan envious of the relationship Mizi has with Sua? Yes. Does he hate that he’ll never get to have the connect they have with Till? Yes. But Ivan hasn’t given any indication that he hates Mizi herself. And I think that’s an important element of his characterization.

Yes, he has negative feelings surrounding Mizi, but he never takes them out on her or lets himself feel negative towards her as a person.

Edit: I started writing this section BEFORE we got the official art of Ivan hanging out with Mizi, but holy fuck am I glad I took so long to finish this because now it’s canon that Ivan got along well with Mizi and they were even close as kids despite the fact that Ivan loved Till and Till loved Mizi.

In conclusion, Ivan and Mizi were reasonably close and (imo) would’ve been besties in slightly different circumstances. Ivan is NOT a Mizi hater!!

4. Ivan is arrogant

Yes and no. On the surface, Ivan comes across as mature, confident, and in some cases arrogant, but as we see more from his perspective it quickly becomes clear that the arrogance is just a mask he wears for others.

Deep down, Ivan is very insecure and his self-esteem is almost nonexistent. He views himself as insignificant, twisted, unworthy. He vilifies everything that he feels and does. (“Thank you for being a victim of my shallow emotions” anyone?) Ivan fully convinced himself that Till wouldn’t give a shit about him if he died to keep him alive. That’s not the behavior of an arrogant person. Far from it.

His arrogant mask acts as a shield to keep others from seeing the monster he thinks he is. He’s even kept parts of himself out.

I think that’s also where his tendency to be an asshole comes from. Keeping people away, not wanting or knowing how to drop the arrogant mask, internalizing everything, projecting onto others (like that whole talk with Sua about self sacrifice).

So basically:

Characterizing Ivan as an insecure person who hides behind false confidence/arrogance to keep people from seeing the real (and somewhat fucked up) him? Great. Fantastic. Love to see it.

Characterizing Ivan as an arrogant asshole “just because”? Terrible. Hate it. You burned my crops and killed my cow.

5. Ivan is violent

I don’t know how this one came about, but it rubs me the wrong way so I’ll touch on it here.

We know Ivan instigated physical fights with Till when they were kids because that was the only way to consistently get Till’s attention (not saying I condone that btw). But outside of that, I don’t think Ivan has been violent with anyone else? And would he even be violent with Till like, recently?? I would say no.

Now I do think Ivan would resort to violence to protect Till, but nothing beyond that. I don’t don’t even think he would use violence to protect himself.

He’d probably just revert back to being a “perfect” obedient pet to avoid or diffuse confrontation. That’s what he did as a child; while Till fought back every chance he got. Till’s fighting spirit is probably one of the things Ivan loved about him. Maybe in part because he couldn’t find it in himself.

————————————————————

Anyways, those are my Top 5 worst Ivan mischaracterizations! Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk 🖤💙

[r3starttt]

Don’t delete the kisses

a/n: I got my inspo from “See You In My 19th Life” also, felt too personal. Basically reader inspired on me lol

Pt 2. | Prt.3 | Prt.4

Warnings: mentions of bullying, suicide, lots of angst and fluff

“I see the signs of a lifetime, you ‘til I die”

You’ve had seventeen lives so far. You’ve been all kinds of people in all kinds of places, and you always remember each one of them. It always happens for different reasons, it could be a smell that reminded you of a perfume, a new dish that apparently you’ve already tried before, a face that felt familiar, a song that made you feel weirdly in love.

At first it was horrifying, it was so confusing and you made so many mistakes. You told people about it. You tried to find your loved ones, tried to approach to them again because your heart still missed them. But eventually you learned to handle it. Eventually the pain of past life losses disappeared and you just learned to ignore your not so nice gift.

You’ve also learned to adapt to every life, which was becoming easier every time because the knowledge, talents and hobbies from every life apparently stayed with you. Maybe it was your soul?

You stopped having complains and learned to value and enjoy everything. You appreciated every mistake you made because it helped you learn for a future life, you enjoyed feeling everything so deeply because it would help you remember the next time you reincarnate, you showed your love for everyone and did everything you wished so you wouldn’t have any regrets. You learned to be positive and take advantage of everything that was offered to you on each life.

Until now.

Ever since you were a child you’ve felt empty. Loved but not enough to fill your heart, admired but feeling like you’re not worth it, with friends that care for you and a lovely family that provides you all you need and all you could ever ask for but feeling like you don’t deserve them. Maybe you were born sad?

It seems like your whole life happened in the blink of an eye. Maybe it’s the sadness that hasn’t allowed you to enjoy this life properly, but where does that come from?

Maybe you’ve got used to sadness so much that you don’t know how to handle it on this life? It’s frustrating, not even all the knowledge in the world, all the abilities you’ve learned and your old soul can handle such feeling. It’s the first thing you’ve been unable to control, ever.

There is a reason why it got out of control though. When you were eleven you were bullied by your whole class, including some professors. And it didn’t matter how much privilege you had, neither you or your parents could do anything about it.

That’s the moment all the lonely, angry and sad in you became overwhelming, the moment you started to believe in god again just to beg him every day to kill you, to let you die.

And even if that was almost ten years ago it still haunts you. The humiliation, the anger, the loneliness. And you can’t handle it, not because you don’t know how to, but because your body doesn’t allow you to.

Your heart always reminds you of it, like it happens with your past lives, there’s always a smell, a word, an action. The way those kids made you feel, they things those adults said to you, the way your parents broke in tears when you first told them, the awkwardness at home whenever they tried to make you talk to them. It all stuck to you forever.

“What if it’s not meant for me? Love”

However there was someone that was worth trying to live. Her name is Ellie, and you’ve been dating her for some years now.

She’s your childhood best friend, the person you trust the most on this world and the only one that doesn’t make you feel overwhelmed. Your girlfriend and the lover you’ve feel more connected to or all your lives.

“Do you believe in soulmates?” You’re both laying on her bed, staring at the ceiling and talking about random stuff, whatever goes trough your minds “Or…. reincarnation”

“None of them, do you?” you could see her moving her head towards you from the corner of your eye “Yeah, I’d like us to be soulmates and find each other on each life” a chuckle came out of Ellie’s mouth “you’re so cheesy ughh” you laughed back, kicking her shoulder with your arm to which she complained.

“I know but, I’ve never loved someone this much el” you turned your head too, smiling at the look of Ellie’s shy smile and and her slightly tainted cheeks “you’ve really saved my life, you know it” Just as those words were spoken, her face changed completely.

“all good?”

You could see the worry on her face, in the way her eyes studied yours and on the pout that slowly appeared. You just sighed back, hesitating a bit and debating if you should tell her the truth or not.

“It’s probably my birthday, I’ll be fine” the reassurment in your voice didn’t seem to convince her, so you spoke again “el, things have been good in the past few years, it’s not gonna change suddenly”

“What if they do?” she’s right, what if they do?

“They won’t, I would already know and I would tell you, I promise” you do know, but you won’t tell her, not now.

“You tell me to get over it and to take you out, but I can’t and I’m too scared. “

You’ve tried to take your life some years ago, before Ellie and you started to date. Honestly, to this day you still don’t know how you managed to not die. It was late at night, right before your birthday, it always makes you feel extremely sad for some reason, you believe is the fear of growing up, of things getting harder.

“And here’s the night bus, I have to go. And the doors are closing and you’re waving”

You’ve had that feeling for over a month. All your healing process falling apart just for your birthday? you still feel ashamed about it. You just took some random blade you’d saved for this moment and started to practically stab your wrists.

All your thoughts mixed with the weirdly feeling of pain and satisfaction and the blood dripping down your arms blinded you, and in the blink of an eye you just loose the balance and fainted.

But you promised yourself that if you didn’t make it back then, you would try it again, no matter what. Or at least you tried to convince yourself.

“What if it’s not meant for me? Love”

“What are you gonna gift me?” you decided to better change the topic before your thoughts could overwhelm any of you “What do you want?” Her hands tangle with yours.

“You haven’t got me anything yet?” a laugh scapes your mouth “I do but…. I don’t know” Ellie loved handmade gifts, however she always does something different for you. “You know I love your gifts el, you can give me a rock and I would admire it forever”

Your hands slowly move from Ellie’s, cupping her face and making her look at you. She’s so pretty, with the light of the sun coming through the window snd hitting her freckles just perfect, making her eyes look shiny too.

“So you want a rock then?” of course she had to make jokes, she can’t handle romantic moments, gets to nervous. You just roll your eyes.

“You know, a perfect gift would be that you stopped using those crusty converse” she immediately groans, pushing your hands away from her face and leaning on her back

“What’s wrong with them?”

“They smell, they’re broken and they’re dirty as fuck because you never clean them”

“They don’t smell! and I glued them recently”

“Ellie, please”

“But don’t call me by my full name”

“I’m not! And I’ve always called you Ellie”

“No you haven’t, you call me El”

“El, please buy some new converse for my birthday”

“And what do I get for doing it?”

“Your girlfriends happiness”

“I think that’s a sign. I’m losing self control and it’s you”

And that’s how you it was for the rest of the day. Ellie pouting every time you teased her but calling you dramatic if you said anything about her teasing you. Also, Ellie suddenly telling you random facts about dinosaurs and space and just random stuff in general.

That was the las time you saw her, until your birthday. She’d come earlier than anyone else to have more time alone with you. It’s not that you had many friends but your family always came too so they’d keep you busy all day.

A day before you were looking through your closet, finding all the cute gifs Ellie had made you, admiring the details of all her drawings and reading the letters. Watching all the Polaroids your mom took of you two, the gift she made for you when she asked you to be her girlfriend, a bracelet she gifted you when you asked her to be her friend, a letter you made for her from when you first fought.

And it made you feel horrible, because the decision was already made, the letters for all the people you cared about were already written and saved in your desk. Your phone was already unlocked so everyone could have access to it, your room was tidy and your closet clean.

You were just waiting for her, for tomorrow, for all your family to be together when you left so it would be hopefully easier to everyone. For everyone to be there and get their letters, for Ellie to not be alone when she got the news, for your parents and your girlfriend to be comforted by each other’s presence.

You went downstairs, looking for Ellie since you heard your parents already speaking with her. They were all siting at the dining room.

It made your heart melt to see you happy she looked the moment she saw you. Her eyes, her pretty nose scrunching a little, her smile widening.

“Can I see my gift already?” Your parents laughed in disbelief, telling you to at lest greet her properly before asking her about a gift.

“Your parents told me you’ll open them later” she chuckled, looking at your parents and then back at you, you did the same.

You stepped closer to her, grabbing her hands and taking her to your room.

“Can you at least tell me what is it? I’ll act surprised I promise”

“A rock”

“Haha so funny el”

You closed the door behind you, watching Ellie sitting on your bed. She just stared at you, with puppy eyes of course. You really hoped you wouldn’t remember this when you reincarnated, or at least that It wouldn’t hurt as much as it does right now.

“What’s that box?” her finger pointed at the box you were just looking trough last night. You walked towards it and took it to the bed, sitting besides Ellie.

“All your gifts” she looked at you in pure shock “This is something I did for you when we were like…. Seven or something, why’d you still have it?”

“My mom saved all this things, it’s cute isn’t?”

“I feel exposed”

“What’s wrong with it? I love all of it”

“Your gift is not gonna fit in here”

“So it’s not a rock and defined not a new pair or converse” your eyes moved towards Ellie’s shoes, she just sighed

“Stop it, you’re the only one that notices them”

“My parents do, my mom asked my why you never changed them” that was a lie, but how could Ellie know?

You did the same thing as last nigh, take a final look to all the gifts that Ellie had made to you, not now with her. You’d made fun of her and she would just frown her eyebrows and eventually pout if she felt really ashamed of it. You’d make her read the letters out loud and ask her about the process of every draw she’d made of you.

“This letter is for me, why didn’t you give it to me?” Now you understood the feeling, karma. “We fought, I decided it was better to apologize in person” her hands leaned the letter towards you, making you read it out loud just as you’d made her do to you.

“January 13 2020” you stopped as she laughed “don’t laugh, you wanted me to read it I’ll read every detail then”

“I’m sorry for whatever I did to make you mad, I’m still not sure what it was- Ellie, you’re such a dramatic person”

“Me? You’re the one that’s dramatic for making a whole letter even though you hate writing just to randomly apologize”

“This just proves how much I love you, shut up”

“Right, keep reading”

“I’m still not sure what it was, but I feel like apologizing because Dina told me how much you’ve been crying and how awful I made you feel-“ you got interrupted by a loud gasp

“Why would Dina told you?” She slapped her hands on her face, groaning “only fucking fake friends these days” you laughed

“Hey don’t say that! I love Dina, she’s the sweetest and I bet she also tells you all I tell her about you, you’re overreacting for something that happened three years ago”

“You speak about me with her?” You nodded

“I want you to know that I’m so fucking grateful for having someone like you in my life. For a long time you were the only one that made me laugh, the only one that made me feel happy and loved and like life was worth it. You’re the reason I keep trying” you could feel the knot of tears forming in your throat, so painful “I feel like you got mad for what I said, but I want you to know that I didn’t mean it in a bad way, I wanted you to know how I truly felt about you and us and my life. I didn’t want to lie to you, I can’t. I was hoping you could understand that I didn’t tell you that before because I was afraid of how would you react, because I care for you snd I don’t want you to get hurt just for my weakness-“

The door of the room got opened after some small knocks were heard. Everyone had got there already. You didn’t realize how long you’ve been in your room with Ellie, totally worth it though.

You just saved the letter in the box again. You’ve purposely let it in your room for Ellie to take a look of it later that day, for her to have something left from you.

You both went downstairs again, Ellie went with your friends and you went to greet each family member, having some small talk with everyone and thanking them for being here.

And the time today felt extremely fast. Maybe this was the first birthday you’ve properly enjoyed, maybe you were excited or anxious, maybe it was the calm you’ve felt for the first time in years, maybe-

“I wanna eat the cake already, can’t you hurry them?” Ellie’s hands positioned around your waist, hugging you from behind and pulling you closer to her. You could see her pretty face resting on your shoulder, staring at you.

“You smell like gummies” you smiled without even realizing, now looking at Ellie. Her lips pressed in yours, the sour and sweet flavor invading your tongue “I ate gummies”.

“There’s tons of food El, why don’t you just eat something that’s not candy? Instead of asking for cake that by the way you won’t get to eat” she pinched your stomach slightly “why won’t I get to eat cake?” “I don’t think there’s enough for everyone

“I deserve it more than them, I’ve been with you, listening to your annoying voice every day” now you pinched her back “shut up or you really won’t get any”

“Do we really have to stay here with everyone? Your grandpa freaks me out” you chuckled “stop being rude to my family” “do we?” “let’s go outside”

And so you walked to the small garden behind your house, sitting on the cold grass with Ellie

“You seem happier this year…. do you feel happier?” you can see her toying with her fingers, staring at them to avoid eye contact “are you worried about me?” your gaze is now focused on your family, inside the house. You can see your friends almost eating each other on the closest window, it makes you laugh.

“The letter…. am I really that important to you?”

“You’re my best friend since forever el, you’re my girlfriend, why wouldn’t you?”

“I don’t know, I thought I didn’t help you at all”

“You do”

You turned around again, facing Ellie. She was picking the grass. How were you supposed to leave her? How were you supposed to ever live without her?

You grabbed her face with your hands, pulling her closer for a kiss. Her lips felt just perfect for yours, her skin was so soft, her face just the right size for your hands to fit, her hair the right strength for you to feel it every time you two kissed. You couldn’t do this to her

You tried to break the kiss, but her hands moved behind your back, pulling you closer to her again and deepening the kiss. You could feel her smile trough the kiss, she’s so fucking pretty.

“I love you Ellie, I’ve always loved you, don’t ever doubt it” she laughs in confusion “I love you too” It was the third time you probably said it out loud, you really wished you would’ve told her sooner.

“I’m electric, a romantic cliché”

“Take this, I was planning on give it to you later but…. I guess it’s the right time” you looked confused at her, she was looking for something on her hoodie pockets. A rock

Maybe you should wait, just a little more, just for her.

The rock was painted with your favorite colors, it was your face. Why is she so lovely? Why can’t her love fill your heart? What’s wrong with you?

She slowly puts it on your hands, studying your face, looking for any reaction. You lean on her, hugging her as both of your bodies fall on the grass. You can’t see her but she’s definitely smiling.

“I can’t imagine a life without you Ellie, don’t ever dear to leave me” she thought you were just being romantic because of the gift, but you mean it, you hope you fin her always and forever. To hopefully have the life you won’t be able to enjoy with her this time.

Her hands rubbing your back, her nose smelling your perfume, nuzzling on your neck “I won’t, I promise”

“Let’s go for the cake, I can hear your stomach” you rest your arms on the grass, positioning each one besides Ellie’s face and giving her another kiss. Her eyes look so pretty.

The sky turns orange as you get inside the house again. You hate this part of the day because it means it’s almost over, and today specially you want everything but the day to end. You hope every smiley face in the house can forgive you for what you’re about to do, you hope they understand.

So now you’re siting in the middle of the table, with everyone you love around you as they sing happy birthday to you. Ellie is sitting besides you, taking pictures of you. And you can only thank her in a small whisper, and thank the universe in your mind for letting her have that picture as her last memory of you.

The minute the song is over everyone claps, watching you turn off the candle. You always wished for happiness, but today you’re just wishing for forgiveness. Your smile is wide, it hurts to lie to everyone there.

Before your mom cuts the cake for you as she usually did, you grab the knife and cut a big slice of cake for Ellie. “Can we open the gifts?” you ask loudly to everyone, knowing that way your parents wouldn’t make you wait more.

Everyone’s eating cake, sitting on the couches in the living room, most men in the room staring up, Ellie sitting besides you on the floor and offering you to open the gifts to “help you” but you know she’s just gossiping.

Whenever you didn’t like a gift you’d look at Ellie and she’s look back at you, like you could communicate with each other just with your eyes. She’d laugh and pass you another gift.

If you did like a gift then she’d take it from you and would stare at every detail of it. She’d separate discreetly the ones you liked from the ones you didn’t, she’d usually keep those or Insist you on selling them online.

However the more gifts you opened the more anxious you got. “Where’s your gift el?” you whispered as your mom passed you another gift, that seemed to be the last one. But it was way to small to be from Ellie “mine goes last, open that one, come on”

And so you did, it was a set of some pink pijamas, and the moment you opened them you turned your face at Ellie, she was already laughing “Shut up”

“Wait, there one more” you heard your mom speaking as she walked to the kitchen. Everyone looked at her, waiting to see what it was.

She returned with a big rectangular canvas. Did she just made a huge fucking painting for me? you thought, looking back at Ellie who seemed clearly nervous.

“I’ll give you the letter later, I didn’t want to get exposed in front of your whole family” she whispers

You take the canvas and turn it around. It was a portrait of a picture she took of you the day she asked you to date. It was so detailed, so colorful and just so right. You showed it proudly to your family. Everyone cheered Ellie and you couldn’t help but smile at the sight of her shy face, her cheeks covered in blush as she looked at her fingers, just as she did whenever she felt nervous. Your friends making fun of Ellie and you for being so “adorable” as you heard them say.

And the rest of the night Ellie just stood close to you, listening to everyone share all the fun memories and stories they had with you. She shared ridiculous things she’d lived with you, making you cover your face ashamed. But also making you laugh as she always did.

And you couldn’t be more grateful at the end of the day because finally, for one whole day you could finally be happy again, you didn’t felt pressured or anxious or sad or overwhelmed at all, and you were with everyone you loved. You could finally go, you were just waiting for living one happy moment in your life before you took such an important decision, and this was it. Today had been all you’ve ever wished for.

So when everyone left and your parents stayed cleaning you could only feel peacefulness overcoming your body. You went to your room and laid on your bed, Ellie was still there. She had to give you her letter and you couldn’t leave without reading it.

The big canvas was already in your room, right next to your bed. You were cuddling her as you read the letter.

“Happy birthday baby. I hope this year can be different, I hope you can get better, I hope you can be happier, and I hope I’m still here every day to see you smile more and more.

I remember starting the painting and regretting immediately because it was gonna take so long and I’m lazy as fuck. But I made it :)

I had to lie to you many times and tell you Joel needed my help with some stuff just so I could finish it, hope you didn’t get mad at it.

I’ve been noticing you off lately, but if I’m honest I’m too scared to ask. But you know you can always tell me anything, I’ll always understand and I’ll always listen, no judgment.

I’m proud of you for making it another year, and I’m the happiest person ever because I have you and I’m watching you try again and again. I know you’ll get better.

I still remember how nervous I was when I asked you to date, I can’t stop thinking about it lately, maybe it’s because of the painting? but I feel the same even after dating you for years, too cliche for you make me feel the butterflies on the stomach, a lot.

I’m glad we’ve got to grow up together, I can’t imagine this life without you. The other day you told me about this, about reincarnation and soulmates, I don’t believe on it, but if it’s real I’ll make sure I’m with you always. I promise.

I can’t wait for your birthday, I wanna see your reaction and I’m containing so much for not telling you already what it is. If you’re reading this then I didn’t regret writing you this or you found it without me noticing like you did last year, don’t do that again pls :(

Anyway, I want you to know that you’re the fucking best, the prettiest girl ever and I love you so fucking much.

Ellie :)”

She saw how you folded the letter, looking at your face for any response “I love you so fucking much too” you moved your head slightly up so you could properly kiss her. You’ve never kissed her so much in one day, you also wished you would.

She stares back at you, with those puppy eyes you love so much, and her dumb smile now a bit shiny due to the kiss.

Her hand moves to your neck, pressing your head on top of her chest. Her other hand moved to the puffy pink blanket that you had in your bed, moving it up to cover both of your bodies. Your hand moves on top of of her tattoo, caressing it softly with your thumb.

And before you realize you two fall asleep, not knowing how your life’s were about to change in less than twenty four hours.

Maybe it was the anxiety coming back but you woke up earlier than usual. You slowly removed Ellie’s arms from yours, placing them over your pillows.

You stood there for some minutes, just staring at her, at her gift next to your bed. Were you being selfish?

You slowly walked towards your desk, picking the letters and placing them on top of it so everyone could see them easily, you also placed your phone on top of them. This was it.

You hated yourself for not waiting for Ellie to leave, for making her see it and be there, but you had waited enough already.

You walked quietly and slowly to the bed, placing Ellie’s letter besides her. Then you walked to the bathroom, locking yourself in it just in case anyone woke up and went to look for you.

You regretted not taking your phone with you, maybe some music would help.

You slowly remove your clothes. You hear the water run. There’s so thoughts on your head right now.

You don’t even realize but the cuts are already there, making the blood run all over the tub and covering your body with it. Your eyes close and the only sound echoing in your ears is your own breathing.

This is nothing like what you’ve done before, this is it.

“Dear loved Ellie. El, Els

I love you so much, don’t ever forget it, don’t ever doubt it. I’m always gonna be with you and I promise, I swear that we’ll meet again. Please read this first before you do anything else. I’m probably not in bed right now, I knew you would stay, don’t panic.

Ever since you know me I’ve been sad, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I told you how I remember mas past lives when we were younger, remember? and you just laughed at me, but I want you to believe it this time. And I want you to never forget me, I want you to meet me again, in another universe where I’m happy and we can get to live anything we didn’t lived here.

I waited just for you, I tried my best, I promised myself I would only try once, and if I failed then I would take it as a signal to say, but I can’t.

Your jokes, your laugh, your pretty face, the songs you played for me with your guitar, you made me stay and try so many times, but I gave up.

I can’t live lifte this forever, and it hurts me deeply to leave you, because you don’t deserve this and I don’t want to leave, but the pain I feel every day is bigger than what I want.

It’s not your fault, it’s no one’s fault actually.

You told me that whenever I could say things out loud I should write them, but never keep them just for myself, and so I’m doing it right now, hoping you, Dina, Jesse, my mom, my dad, my family, you all understand. I know you will.

I want you to find someone else to make happy, some one that’s worth your fucking amazing and pretty self, someone else that truly deserves your time and your jokes, and your songs on your guitar. Someone that stays with you forever.

I feel so ashamed, I just couldn’t say to anyone out loud how tired I felt, how badly I wanted to die. How my first and kiss though if the day was death, how exhausted I feel every day for no reason. I can’t tell you that the moment you leave I feel overwhelmed again, I feel weak and alone. I just can’t.

I also wanna thank you for being with me every time, for teaching me how to live, for not giving up on me and for being always with me.

I remember the first time we kissed, the first time we slept with each other, how shy you got after that and how much you wanted to tell me but couldn’t so I found out by reading your diary. How mad you got for me reading it but how much you thanked me once we did it. I remember every single one of our dates. I remember the first time you talked to me and I talked to you, the first time you slept and my house and the first time I slept at yours. I never forgot anything, I won’t ever forget.

I remember how you told me you wanted to go to college just so you could work and make us my dreamed house, with an art studio for both of us and a room to have many cats. How you told me that you didn’t want any kids but since you dated me you could only think of having a cute baby that looked just like me. How you got mad when I told you I wanted my last name to go first.

And I want you to live that with someone that’s really worth it.

I’m so sorry for making you stay with me for so long, for making you waist your best years of adolescence and childhood trying to cure me and my sadness. And I’m sorry I’m leaving you like this. But I know you’ll understand.

Words cannot express how much I adore you, how happy you made me, how much I’m in love with you.

Please forgive me.

I swear we’ll meet again, I swear I won’t leave you again, I swear I’ll stay.”

She woke up your parents, your dad unlocked the door. They couldn’t take it.

Now they didn’t understand. Why would you do this? Why didn’t you tell anyone? Did you ever asked for help and they didn’t notice?

Why?

Ellie was too broken to cry. She wanted to look at you but her eyes could only stay at your wrists. She could never forget.

Your parents were on their knees, unable to think, unable to move, just crying.

And so was Ellie. She couldn’t believe just a couple of hours ago she was cuddling with you and now you were gone. How did that even work? There could never exist something more terrifying that your parents sobs. Should she leave? Should she stay?

Should she even try anymore?

She felt so much anger, so much desperation and anxiety in her body. She was so shocked she couldn’t do anything else than stare.

You were gone, forever.

It’s been just a month since you died. She’s been unable to move from her bed, not wanting to eat, not wanting to sleep, feeling dead. She’s been reading your letter nonstop, over and over again, almost memorizing it already.

And your parents? Your family? They’re all broken, how could any of this even happen?

Your funeral was shocking for everyone. Everything had happened so fast, in less then a week, just right after your birthday.

Did you really had to do this?

Everyone felt so sick, for not knowing, for not saying a proper last goodbye to you, for not giving you a proper gift, for not taking enough pictures and videos of you, for not speaking to you enough that last day. For not noticing snd for not helping you.

And Ellie could only hope that she’ll meet you again as you always assured her. That all this pain will disappear eventually. That the love she feel for you would actually help her.

“Me and you were meant to be in love. I see the signs of a lifetime, you ‘til I die”

[jisatsuwaifu]

Life is incredibly frustrating, stressful, and exhausting. Everyday I think “it’s okay, it’ll get better, try again tomorrow” but it just keeps proving me wrong. When I think things are getting better and I can finally relax, something else comes along and puts me right back into panic mode. It’s always something, there’s never a break. I never feel safe. All I do is complain about how sad or frustrated I am and I’m sure everyone around me is sick of hearing it. Which is fine, I wouldn’t want to be surrounded by misery when my life is good either or listen to a broken record when there’s much better music to be heard. I am my own responsibility, I shouldn’t rely on others.

My thoughts consume me. Not in a cutesy I’m just a girl cringe kind of way but in a “I need to go to sleep as soon as possible to prevent an accident” because I cannot trust my own head to comfort me but to only make scenarios worse or feed into my paranoia. I am not built to be left alone. I constantly feel like I’m too much and not enough. I’ve never felt more loved but also so alone in all my life. Everything is black and white there is no grey areas with my mind.

I just don’t think anyone knows or understands how thin I’m being stretched and how badly I’d just love for everything to stop and to be able to catch my breath. Just for a day. I’ve cried for help but I don’t think the one person I need help from genuinely hears me. I dont trust many people to begin with. There’s only so much a single person can take before it starts to cripple them. And I know I can be over dramatic and too emotional at times but this genuinely feels like the end, I can’t see past this point in my life. And the sad part is I do not know how I got here. Or this far to begin with. But I am so tired. It’s times like these I wish I had my mom back or even just a family to lean on and seek advice from, but I can’t even entertain my own sister long enough to talk on the phone with me. I don’t understand why I exist or what my purpose is if all I’ve ever been exposed to is pain and abandonment. There’s some aspects of my life that I know I serve a purpose for and want to make proud, I’m trying my hardest for that one thing. I just don’t want to cause anymore damage than I already have. I can’t be like my mother.

I just needed somewhere to vent, some outlet. It won’t change anything. I feel hopeless and empty again. I might just delete everything. I don’t know.

The best I can do right now is try again tomorrow.

( if you read all of this thanks for listening to my rant and I’m sorry I wasted your time when you could have been scrolling onto something cooler like tiddies or anime idk but ty anyways <3 )

[sammyluvr]

mi cielo — luke alvez

cw : gn!bau!reader, fluff, pet names (mi cielo), food mentions, mentions of a bad day at work, swearing, only lightly edited, 1.1K words. requested ! for my 200+ followers event [ closed ] .

prompt : memorizing their favorite things and treating them when they have a bad day.

luke swings his arm over your shoulders, startling you slightly.

“i thought you left with the others?” you ask, laughing a little at yourself as you calm down the second you realize it’s him. you allow yourself to lean into his side a bit as you walk to the elevator, like you always do when you’re not on the clock.

“i was waiting for you, l/n! c’mon! we’re going to your favorite taco stand, it should still be open. i’m dying for their horchata,” he quips, grinning right at you. it takes all of your willpower not to stumble as you walk into the elevator or fumble over your words. his smile is practically blindingly pretty.

“i’m tired,” you complain, but luke can hear that your resistance is lighthearted and completely moveable. he doesn’t even have to ask a second time for you to relent, and if he could smile wider, he would. “it’s my turn to drive,” you remind him, because he’s always trying to trick you into letting him take on that job.

“mm-mm, nope! no way, i’m treating you tonight!” he argues through his smile.

“luke, you treat me all the time, let me at least do something,” you push, trying to concentrate on convincing him to let you do a favor instead of the feeling of his warm hand against your upper arm or his strong arm heavy over your shoulders. the two of you are quite close, you knew each other even before luke joined the team. so this sort of physical affection is common and casual, but it never fails to send so many butterflies swarming around your stomach because the way you feel about him is anything but casual.

luke pretends to think before answering, “next time.” 

the doors to the elevator ding open, and you groan in playful frustration. “you always say that, and you never let me. you should quit being such a gentleman.”

“other people would beg to differ,” he chimes, and though you know it’s a joke, and you know about just about anyone and everyone in his life (there’s no one right now, and it’s wonderful and makes you stir-crazy at the same time), you can’t help the pang of jealousy. you’re not the only one who gets to experience luke, the gentleman. “besides, that’s not true,” he pushes on, and with his arm around your shoulder, you have no choice but to follow his lead to his own car, “you do plenty of things for me.”

“mmm, like what?” you play along, unable to stop the smile on your own face, even after such a shit day at work. he never fails to make you feel better, lighter, like you’re not alone.

“well, you always buy me my favorite snacks,” he begins motioning vaguely with his free hand as he talks, “you pamper roxy, you introduced me to the best taco stand in dc, and helped me settle in when i joined. and, most importantly, you do a wonderful job of sitting there and looking good! it’s a huge favor when there’s nothing to do in the bullpen.”

you let out a sharp laugh, half to cover up the fact that your cheeks are warming considerably at his last example. “that’s my most important contribution to this friendship?” you question with a playful elbow in his side.

“ahh, you know i’m joking,” luke relents, before putting on that tone of voice where he’s totally messing with you, but trying to sound completely serious, “it’s obviously your love for roxy that’s the most important.”

“mm, you’re so right. that’s cuz roxy’s way more important than you. have i ever told you i like her more than you?” you tease right back.

it’s his turn to let out a pretend offended bark of laughter, “you know, you actually have! plenty of times, you’re starting to hurt my feelings.” you miss his warmth the second he slides his arm from around your shoulders in favor of opening the passenger’s side door to his car, then rounding the vehicle to get in. you’re already buckled as he settles into his seat.

the taco stand is doubly nice because it’s beyond delicious and not too far at all from the office. you’re extra lucky tonight to find a nearby parking space and a short line. when you approach, the worker smiles at the two of you, recognizing you easily after your couple of years coming here together.

luke orders your usual, along with his, not even having to ask if that’s what you want. somehow he knows the days you want to shake it up, and is even more sure of the days you want the comfort of familiarity. you know it’s useless to argue about who’s paying, so you don’t even try tonight.

“so are you two together yet?” the worker asks. this isn’t uncommon coming from the folks at this stand or some of the regulars like doña lina, who always fawns over the two of you when you happen to be getting food at the same time. her son, juan, is the one who just asked, his voice more teasing than his mother’s. 

“ay, todavía no,” luke jokes. not yet, you translate in your head. you should be used to people thinking the two of you should get together. i mean, hell, you think about it all the time. but luke always goes along with it, always says not yet, like eventually he’ll say, yes, finally. you want that day like it’s your childhood dream career. probably a little fictitious, but without a care in the world about that. you just want it, plain and simple, and goodness, do you dream about it.

then luke says something that he normally doesn’t. instead of ignoring your flustered state, or the way you try to laugh and joke it off, he turns to you, putting his arm right back around your shoulders where you think it absolutely belongs.

“someday, right, mi cielo?” he asks it, staring right into your eyes as he says those words, as he calls you his sky. and he’s either the cruelest man in the world and playing a sick, sick joke on you, or he’s completely serious. and because you know he’s not cruel, not on purpose, anyways, you have to think that he means it. so, grabbing onto that tight, and swallowing the butterflies that try to fly up from your stomach and lodge themselves in your throat, you make sure he knows you mean it, too.

you grin right back at him, “sure thing, handsome.”

[fatuismooches]

The way the little cakes in Arlecchino's masterpost look like wedding cakes 😭

As morbid as it sounds... this gives me an idea for an Arlecchino drabble/fic. Imagine Arlecchino proposes to her lover, but before they could have their wedding, their beloved dies/is killed 😭

synopsis: Arlecchino did not initially seek happiness, but now that she's had a taste of it, it hurts for it to be ripped away.

includes: arlecchino w/ gn! reader

notes: Anon...? Who hurt you? I didn't even think of the wedding cakes thing but then your angst? Enjoy this then </3.

Arlecchino, the Fourth Harbinger. The operator of the House of Hearth. The one who has a talent for making people... disappear.

However, despite all of the facts above, to say the Knave was smitten with her lover was an understatement. Yes, even someone like her had a partner, which bewildered anyone who even knew her name.

Most people were not aware of your existence, save for the people that worked at her estate, who were obviously sworn to secrecy. And then there were the Fatui agents stationed at the orphanage who saw you every now and then. Initially, they were confused, but seeing your interactions with their commander, they quickly connected the dots, especially when Arlecchino sent them that look. Working under the Knave generally meant you had to be tight-lipped anyway.

But engagement and marriage can hardly ever be a quiet affair. Word was bound to get out, and it did. After all, one of the Cryo Archon's Harbingers getting married was practically international news. Especially Arlecchino, who never seemed to have a trace of emotion on her face. But with enough control, the word of her union was contained to the Fatui and other high-ranked nobles. Even the Tsaritsa herself was said to be attending the wedding.

It had grown into a bigger event than Arlecchino had planned for, but when she saw how happy you were, she couldn't bring herself to complain. She could endure some idiots for a day if it were for you. She would do a lot of things for you, actually. Never would she have thought of getting married, much less genuinely falling in love. Always, she was out to benefit herself and didn't care for the aftermath of her actions. But after she met you, she knew couldn't ever do that to you. And now, here she was today.

Admittedly, at first, Arlecchino was unsure of how to propose to you. She had bought the ring already, one with a brilliant red stone, a gorgeous thing that would look even better on your finger. (She measured your ring size while you were sleeping.) But now she was left with the problem of how she was to go about doing this. What would you like the best? Should she take you somewhere fancy? Or prepare some words for you? She did not know. She never breached the topic of marriage with you so she had nothing to go off of. As the days passed by, she could only play with the ring with her fingers as she stared at it contemplatively.

Although Arlecchino remained stone-faced during work, Columbina had noticed her friend's dilemma, which at first had proved to be amusing for the Third Harbinger, but even she had grown to feel pity.

"Arlecchino~♫ That's quite a long face you're wearing, hmm?"

"...Oh. It is you, Columbina. Is there something you require?"

"Hehe, it seems to me that you are the one that needs help instead, isn't that so?" At Columbina's cheekiness, she knew what her friend was referring to.

"I am just... uncertain of how to proceed," she confessed, and Columbina hummed in agreement.

"I say you just be honest," Columbina said simply. "You're not a very talkative person, are you? Perhaps this one time you should use your words to describe how you truly feel. Don't rehearse or plan it. It will come to you naturally. I think [Name] would enjoy that more than anything else."

Arlecchino had thought about what she said. Would you enjoy something like that? She was slightly frustrated at how unskilled she was in matters of the heart. But the more she pondered, the more impatient she grew. She wanted you to be hers now.

And so, one morning, you woke up to your cheek being pressed against something soft. It was probably just a pillow, you thought in your sleepy haze. Until you realized this pillow was stroking your hair repeatedly. When you peeked up, you were astonished to see your lover still in bed by now. Normally, she was up early in the morning and returned late at night, so morning cuddles while you were awake were far in between. The rare occurrence had made all the sleepiness in you dissipate as you shuffled in Arlecchino's arms, drawing her attention.

"A-Arlie? Why are you still in bed? Normally you're gone way earlier!" She merely shrugged her shoulders like it was no big deal.

"Partners must make time for each other, no?" She didn't elaborate but she didn't need to, you already knew what she was trying to say and you were overjoyed by this simple gesture. Her warmth and presence had suddenly made the sleepiness seep back into your body, but now that you finally had Arlecchino to yourself again, it felt like a waste to spend that time sleeping! You should spend this time talking to her! Although it was mostly you doing all the talking while she bore her eyes into you (an act of unspoken love.)

Arlecchino quickly noticed you fighting your drooping eyelids. "Sleep," she commanded. "I will be back earlier today as well." With that, she placed a kiss on your forehead, and though you were even more surprised at her early return, you drifted back to the land of dreams.

When you awoke, she was gone, but that was okay. Because soon into the evening you were somehow having dinner with your beloved. It was probably the longest dinner you ever had, as you couldn’t help but babble and bask in the presence of Arlecchino as she nodded and hummed, sometimes putting in a few words or even sentences of her own when you asked her how her days have been lately, and if everything was okay since this was kind of unusual, but in no way were you complaining! But she graced you with a rare small smile and instead continued to feed you dinner and occasionally wipe your mouth with a napkin. When she easily carried you bridal style to your shared bedroom, all the servants kept their eyes on the ground.

After the two of you took a bath together, you knew for sure something was up. And you weren’t sure what was happening. Was she just in a good mood? Or did she have something to tell you? You didn’t realize you were pacing back and forth in your room until Arlecchino broke into your thoughts.

“Are you alright?” To others, her face would look the same but you could see the concern laced within her features.

“I am fine… but are you okay? I mean, I’m incredibly happy about today, but you seem… distracted,” you admitted. You knew from the flicker in her eyes you were right. She had become more vulnerable with her emotions around you.

“I have something to tell you, [Name].” With that, she moved closer to you until your bodies were practically touching. “It’s something very important…” she murmured, a lean and strong arm coming to rest on your back while the other cupped your cheek.

“I have thought long and hard about how to say this, but nothing I think of seems like it’ll be up to the standards you deserve. But nevertheless, I hope you can accept my words.” You were touched by her sincere vulnerability. You leaned in to press your forehead against hers and Arlecchino’s eyes widened in surprise.

“You don’t need to worry about being graceful or perfect around me, you know. I’ll take anything you have to say, love.” Your lover did not respond but you know she deeply appreciated your answer. She stepped back and instead intertwined her fingers with your own.

“I am not adept with words or feelings, or romance or emotions. I saw no need to be acquainted with those things, having believed they served no beneficial purpose. But when I look at you, I feel the urge to make sure you know the extent of my love, whether I have to whisper it into your ear or show you. Not once have I thought someone was truly beautiful until I met you. Your eyes, smile, laugh… they make my days less tiring and more bright, something that I have never experienced before. So, what I am saying… no matter what happens in the future… I want you to forever be by my side,” she finished, getting down on one knee and looking straight into your eyes. As she popped open the ring box, she asked, “[Name], will you marry me?”

After a few seconds of silence, tears sprung to your eyes as you nearly tackled her in a hug. Through your weeping, you happily accepted and cried out her real name, as she slid the ring onto your finger. Her soon-to-be spouse.

You were engaged to Arlecchino… wow.

Now, Arlecchino preferred to leave the details of the wedding planning to you. It wasn't that she was uninterested, no, of course not, but rather she was more content seeing how excited you were over it. It was the dream of many people to plan their most important day, down to the placement of each decoration and how this color matches with that and so on. Plus, although she loathed to admit it, her duties as a Harbinger left her little time. 

Though when she managed to get off early, she made sure to listen to every word you spoke about how the preparations were going, adding in little 'hmms' and 'that does sound lovely' here and there as she protectively cuddled you to her chest. The theme, flowers, colors, venue, outfits, music… you were putting thought into many things. She had to admit that though she was more focused on the act of marrying you rather than the party aspect, the way you spoke about it seemed like it may be more than enjoyable for her. Hopefully, because she did not plan on getting married ever again.

Speaking of preparations, it seemed that you had a request for her by the way your eyes shyly flickered from her face to elsewhere. Arlecchino held your chin and inquired what you needed. Her betrothed need not be shy about anything. Your face grew warm as you whispered two words embarrassingly.

“Cake testing.”

“Cake… testing?” She repeated your words slowly. You nodded your head.

“It’s basically where the couple samples a bunch of cakes together. And they decide which one they want. You know, for the wedding. So, I was thinking maybe we could go together… just for a bit! I know you’re busy and all…” Your face grew hotter the more she stared at you. Archons, that was embarrassing.

To be honest, Arlecchino wasn’t very informed about wedding rituals or customs, but by the look on your face, she could see that this was very important to you. And so she promised to find some time off. (But… cake testing, huh? Out of all things, you asked her to share sweets with her? You were so cute.)

It took a while, but eventually, you found your arm intertwined with Arlecchino’s one, situated with tables of cakes and different desserts to sample from. Of course, no expense was spared. Only the best was to be offered to the Fourth Harbinger and her soon-to-be spouse.

Arlecchino did not have much of a sweet tooth, but she was all too happy to watch you kick your feet at the delicious flavor of the cakes. To obediently open her mouth as you fed her some yourself. To listen to you ramble on about how you liked this one but that one was also too good, ah, how hard life decisions were! (The scene looked quite eerie to the staff, and they weren’t sure whether they were dreaming or having a nightmare, for this surely could not be real life. Not the Knave, the ice-cold snappy and sarcastic Harbinger who brought only fear and anxiety into the room.)

After many conversations and cake-consuming, you arrived at one final cake - pure white with a blood-red cherry on top. It looked mouth-watering, and you were all too happy to bring the fork to your mouth. Arlecchino had her fill of sweets for the day and was content to hold you to her chest as you ate. She liked seeing you happy.

A cough resonated through the room. Arlecchino stiffened and looked down at you worriedly. “That’s enough sugar for now, don’t you think? You won’t be able to sleep tonight.” Her eyebrows furrowed as she received no verbal response. Only this time it was not just a cough. It was coughs and hacks and wheezes. Immediately she was on guard and quickly flipped your body around as the plate clattered to the floor. You were clutching your throat and practically fell into her, weakness overtaking your body. Never had so much surprise shown on Arlecchino’s face.

Quickly, she yelled for the servants, something no one had ever seen her do, but she did not care. You tried to force out her real name as you gripped onto the cuff of her shirt with everything you had left. Her eyes skittered to what you were eating and instantly made a connection. Without hesitance, she reached for another cherry and put it in her mouth and that’s when she knew. 

Poison. Someone poisoned you. As a highly trained Harbinger, she was resistant to many types of poison, but you… you were just a… normal person. Who would- who could not… She could only look on helplessly as the life in your eyes dissipated and you failed to respond to her calls. Never did Arlecchino believe she could be so powerless. Not until now.

At this point, many Fatui and staff had crowded into the room as well. But it was too late. Many stared not only in horror at your stillness, but also the sheer anger and bloodlust radiating off of the Knave.

The feeling was one unfamiliar to Arlecchino. Never had she lost someone that made her feel like her heart, soul, and body had been burned and withered to ashes. Because you were the first person she loved. You were the one who gave her a taste of what happiness was like. But now you had also given her the taste of genuine loss. 

As she cradled your lifeless body, she made another promise to you and herself, one that she would keep this time:

You wouldn’t be the only person dying today.

[prentissluvr]

mi cielo — luke alvez

for : 200+ followers event [ open ] ➖⟢ pairing : luke alvez x gn!bau!reader ➖⟢ genre : fluff ➖⟢ cw : pet names (mi cielo), food mentions, mentions of a bad day at work, swearing, only lightly edited ➖⟢ wc : 1.1K prompt : memorizing their favorite things and treating them when they have a bad day.

luke swings his arm over your shoulders, startling you slightly.

“i thought you left with the others?” you ask, laughing a little at yourself as you calm down the second you realize it's him. you allow yourself to lean into his side a bit as you walk to the elevator, like you always do when you’re not on the clock.

“i was waiting for you, l/n! c’mon! we’re going to your favorite taco stand, it should still be open. i’m dying for their horchata,” he quips, grinning right at you. it takes all of your willpower not to stumble as you walk into the elevator or fumble over your words. his smile is practically blindingly pretty.

“i’m tired,” you complain, but luke can hear that your resistance is lighthearted and completely moveable. he doesn’t even have to ask a second time for you to relent, and if he could smile wider, he would. “it’s my turn to drive,” you remind him, because he’s always trying to trick you into letting him take on that job.

“mm-mm, nope! no way, i’m treating you tonight!” he argues through his smile.

“luke, you treat me all the time, let me at least do something,” you push, trying to concentrate on convincing him to let you do a favor instead of the feeling of his warm hand against your upper arm or his strong arm heavy over your shoulders. the two of you are quite close, you knew each other even before luke joined the team. so this sort of physical affection is common and casual, but it never fails to send so many butterflies swarming around your stomach because the way you feel about him is anything but casual.

luke pretends to think before answering, “next time.” 

the doors to the elevator ding open, and you groan in playful frustration. “you always say that, and you never let me. you should quit being such a gentleman.”

“other people would beg to differ,” he chimes, and though you know it’s a joke, and you know about just about anyone and everyone in his life (there’s no one right now, and it’s wonderful and makes you stir-crazy at the same time), you can’t help the pang of jealousy. you’re not the only one who gets to experience luke, the gentleman. “besides, that’s not true,” he pushes on, and with his arm around your shoulder, you have no choice but to follow his lead to his own car, “you do plenty of things for me.”

“mmm, like what?” you play along, unable to stop the smile on your own face, even after such a shit day at work. he never fails to make you feel better, lighter, like you’re not alone.

“well, you always buy me my favorite snacks,” he begins motioning vaguely with his free hand as he talks, “you pamper roxy, you introduced me to the best taco stand in dc, and helped me settle in when i joined. and, most importantly, you do a wonderful job of sitting there and looking good! it’s a huge favor when there’s nothing to do in the bullpen.”

you let out a sharp laugh, half to cover up the fact that your cheeks are warming considerably at his last example. “that’s my most important contribution to this friendship?” you question with a playful elbow in his side.

“ahh, you know i’m joking,” luke relents, before putting on that tone of voice where he’s totally messing with you, but trying to sound completely serious, “it’s obviously your love for roxy that’s the most important.”

“mm, you’re so right. that’s cuz roxy’s way more important than you. have i ever told you i like her more than you?” you tease right back.

it’s his turn to let out a pretend offended bark of laughter, “you know, you actually have! plenty of times, you’re starting to hurt my feelings.” you miss his warmth the second he slides his arm from around your shoulders in favor of opening the passenger’s side door to his car, then rounding the vehicle to get in. you’re already buckled as he settles into his seat.

the taco stand is doubly nice because it’s beyond delicious and not too far at all from the office. you’re extra lucky tonight to find a nearby parking space and a short line. when you approach, the worker smiles at the two of you, recognizing you easily after your couple of years coming here together.

luke orders your usual, along with his, not even having to ask if that’s what you want. somehow he knows the days you want to shake it up, and is even more sure of the days you want the comfort of familiarity. you know it’s useless to argue about who’s paying, so you don’t even try tonight.

“so are you two together yet?” the worker asks. this isn’t uncommon coming from the folks at this stand or some of the regulars like doña lina, who always fawns over the two of you when you happen to be getting food at the same time. her son, juan, is the one who just asked, his voice more teasing than his mother’s. 

“ay, todavía no,” luke jokes. not yet, you translate in your head. you should be used to people thinking the two of you should get together. i mean, hell, you think about it all the time. but luke always goes along with it, always says not yet, like eventually he’ll say, yes, finally. you want that day like it’s your childhood dream career. probably a little fictitious, but without a care in the world about that. you just want it, plain and simple, and goodness, do you dream about it.

then luke says something that he normally doesn’t. instead of ignoring your flustered state, or the way you try to laugh and joke it off, he turns to you, putting his arm right back around your shoulders where you think it absolutely belongs.

“someday, right, mi cielo?” he asks it, staring right into your eyes as he says those words, as he calls you his sky. and he’s either the cruelest man in the world and playing a sick, sick joke on you, or he’s completely serious. and because you know he’s not cruel, not on purpose, anyways, you have to think that he means it. so, grabbing onto that tight, and swallowing the butterflies that try to fly up from your stomach and lodge themselves in your throat, you make sure he knows you mean it, too.

you grin right back at him, “sure thing, handsome.”

[autisticlancemcclain]

part one

part two

———

“Ugh,” Keith says.

“Ugh,” Lance agrees.

Keith looks up slowly from where he was glowering at his plate of appetizers, staring at Lance for several minutes with eyes squinted in suspicion.

“What the fresh fuck are you talking about.”

Lance wrinkles his nose at him. “What?”

“You love these things,” Keith says, like the Blue Paladin is a particularly slow toddler. “You’re usually – prancing around, making a fool of yourself in front of pretty people. Every time one of these dumbass celebration missions ends you complain. The fuck you mean, ‘ugh’?”

“I mean ugh,” Lance repeats, emphasizing the word. “Sometimes I simply do not feel the party vibe, Keith. You ever think about that? No. Because you never think about anything. Because the only thing in your skull is a hamster wheel covered in cobwebs. So there.”

Keith lets that hang between them for a moment.

“You’re just mad you got called ugly earlier, huh.”

“It was so rude!” Lance explodes, obviously waiting for Keith to bring it up. “Like, who says that? What kind of trained diplomat refers to a random stranger as ‘the homely one’? Why the fuck would you say that? And it’s not even true! I’m a legit snack! I have been propositioned, you know! More than once! It’s actually quite frequent!” He throws his hand up, noise of frustration coming from deep in his throat. He opens and closes his mouth a few times, but no actual sentences come out, just different variations of ‘ugh!’ and ‘how dare!’ and ‘the nerve!’.

Because he is a stellar person, Keith does not laugh, instead biting his tongue as hard as he physically can without biting it clean off. Everytime Lance’s sputtering dies off only to kick back up when he thinks of his transgression again it gets harder.

Contrary to what everyone seems to think, Keith likes Lance. They’re friends. They hang out, they talk shit about other people, they do friend things. That’s why they’re both sitting here, at the edge of some grandiose ballroom on a planet whose name Keith has forgotten because they’ve only been here one day, leaning against each other and picking food off the same plate. (Well, Keith’s plate. He’s being gracious and letting Lance have some because Lance has taken enough massive Ls today, and Hunk is busy, so if Lance gets hangry Keith can’t just pass him off on somebody, so. Better to keep him fed, or whatever.)

“We should go – do something,” Lance mutters, picking apart what appears to be a cookie. Maybe. Alien shit is weird. “Make faces behind Shiro’s back. Convince Coran to get wine drunk.”

“We did that already,” Keith dismisses. “Last time, remember? We can’t do it too many times or we’re gonna have to be supervised again. We just managed to convince Shiro to ease up on the trackers.”

Lance sinks further into his chair. “Ugh,” he says again, with true feeling.

Keith begins to feel bad. Lance doesn’t look genuinely upset, he doesn’t think – he knows what a genuinely upset Lance looks like and it’s fucking heartbreaking; it’s the kind of shit that could stop wars – but Keith is a little bit worried that he is bothered, in some way. It can’t feel good to get called ugly in front of everybody. It was funny. And Keith laughed a little. But, still.

Keith nudges their shoulders together. “You wanna go dance?”

Lance freezes. He turns his head slowly to face Keith, like if he moves too fast Keith is going to change his mind. His brown doe eyes are wide and hopeful and over the top, honestly. God. No one asked for that.

“Really?”

“No. I’m taking back my offer. You’re being weird about it.”

“Nope! Nuh-uh! No takebacksies! We’re dancing!” Lance whoops, shoving back his chair and scrambling to his feet. He wraps his fingers tightly around Keith’s wrist, grinning so wide his face is about to split.

“You are holding me hostage,” Keith complains, smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. He gets up at Lance’s urging, popping the last of the weirdo alien cookie in his mouth and wiping his hand on his suit pants. “Let’s go, Homely One.”

If looks could kill, Keith’s intestines would be painting the floor. The look Lance gives him is lethal. It’s made worse when Keith laughs, because that was funny as hell and he refuses to pretend otherwise. He pulls Lance away, though, before he can reach for the butterknife that’s closeby and stab Keith in the eye, clasping their hands together and weaving them through the crowd of dancers and partygoers. Pretty soon the excitement catches up to Lance, because after a minute he’s the one dragging them around, having apparently picked a perfect spot on the ornate marble dancefloor for them to situate themselves. It is, of course, right smack in the middle, surrounded by people on all sides, right under the massive and delicate crystal chandelier that Keith and Hunk spent forty minutes mocking when they first got here.

“You’re extra as all fuck,” Keith informs him, dutifully putting his hand on Lance’s waist as instructed.

“I will have my Sam Montgomery moment or so help me God,” Lance responds. Keith notices he’s closer than he needs to be and immediately orders himself to un-notice that. He can see flecks of amber in Lance’s dark eyes. It’s so actually horrible. He focuses on Lance’s nose, instead, hoping for reprieve, but of course there is where all his freckles are. An attempt to focus on Lance’s mouth is a disaster waiting to happen, so he looks deliberately at Lance’s bigass forehead to distract himself. It kind of works.

The forehead that he is so intensely focused on wrinkles, and Keith says, “What,” and Lance says, “Aw, Keith, gross,” and then before Keith can stop anything Lance is untangling their hands, licking his thumb, and wiping something at the corner of his mouth.

Keith freezes.

He processes.

He gags.

All in that order.

“Lance!” he cries, swiping his own hands at his mouth. “Gross!”

“What’s gross is you walking around with crusty icing on the corner of your mouth, heathen,” Lance says, eyebrow arched and chin tilted defiantly.

Keith makes a strangled noise in the back of his throat. His face matches his armour. He prays that the universe crack open the ground to swallow him whole. He can’t – gah. No one has done that to him since Shiro’s mother would come to visit and take them to get ice cream. When he was eleven.

“Are you a ninety year old grandmother,” he hisses, swiping the corner of his mouth one last time. He thinks his face may actually be glowing.

“Are you a two year old who can’t keep his food in his mouth?” Lance counters. He looks entirely unbothered and Keith wants to strangle him. Who does that. Who, honestly.

“That is not how I wanted your spit near my mouth,” Keith mutters, and immediately wants to open his bayard between his eyes.

Lance stops. A twirling trio of people bumps into him. He does not move. Slowly, his face begins to burn, starting from the sharp jut of his cheekbones and quickly spreading everywhere else. He opens his mouth, then closes it, then narrows his eyes in determination and opens it again.

“Nope,” Keith says before he can say anything. There is no recovery from this. There is only tactical retreat. “I have to – I left my excuse on the castle. I’m gonna go grab it.”

As quickly as he can manage he lets go of Lance’s hand and his waist, gracefully ducking around a dancing couple and high-tailing the hell out of the room. He averts his eyes when he walks by Shiro, praying he doesn’t get stopped, and walks straight out the door. Lance’s calls of his name quickly become faint as he sprints down the hallway.

He can’t believe — God, he said that. Out loud. To Lance’s face. After Lance fucking — licked his thumb and wiped Keith’s face. Like the fussy mother he is.

And Keith is still attracted to him.

He stops in the middle of the hallway, head cradled in his hands, skin hot to the touch.

Fuck, he has a complex.

[infiniteimaginings]

Hii! I know ur requests are closed and stuff and I don’t even know if you’re still writing for this but could you do a Ravi ross x reader?? Maybe an enemies to lovers thing? 😭 I was also wondering if it could be set when bunk’d was taking place if that makes sense! If not that’s ok :) Have a nice day or night.(excuse my English not my first language lol)

Lost (Ravi Ross x GN!Reader)

Summary: You get lost with one of the only people at camp you can't stand and somehow it's your fault? Who's leaving the other if a bear comes? Who's taking the last life jacket and leaving the other? Whose dislike of the other is just intense admiration that they don't know how to handle? Pronouns: You/Yours Warnings: They talk about/to each other rudely, in depth about parental issues lol, but other than that none Word Count: 3.4k A/N: Me saying requests are (ever) closed just means I won't respond to them quickly or look at them closely. If it's open it means I can write for them and I know for a fact I'll be able to post it. Don't worry, you can still send stuff in, it's okay.

Camp Kikiwaka was a summer camp placed in the outskirts of Maine where a bunch of kids would either complain due the lack of cell service or would find comfort in one another through competitions. Most everyone at Camp Kikiwaka got along, that was mainly due to the counselors who pushed everyone together almost against their wills. That worked for almost everyone, almost.

You were extremely likable, people wanted you on their teams, in their campsites, at sleepovers, etc. You were a caring and sweet person who people got along with. This meant you were basically friends with everyone. That wasn’t true though, it wasn’t true because someone in the camp absolutely despised every single thing you did.

That person's name was Ravi Ross, someone who people enjoyed the company of. They thought he was intelligent, helpful, resourceful, and interesting as well as fun. He was also someone you decided to name ‘Try Hard Rich Boy’ because he tried way too hard for a camp where the main objective was to have fun. From the nickname alone, it’s clear the sentiment he shared for you was reciprocated.

Both of you understood the lack of bond the two of you had, and neither of you cared. Sure, you had the same friends, and you were friends with his siblings, but that didn’t matter. You tried to keep any sort of conversation short, and it lasted the majority of the time at camp.

You had to go to the Grizzly cabin one day to grab something from Xander for Zuri. The curly haired girl was currently busy on the docks and kindly bribed you to go instead, to which you agreed after much persuading. You took your time and knocked before letting yourself in due to a lack of response, Zuri said the item was in a bag with her name on it, it should’ve just been on one of the dressers. You knew Xander wouldn’t mind, so you shrugged and began your search.

As you looked you heard a bit of a heavy walk so you turned around and were met face to scales with Mrs. Kipling, one of your favorite campers of Camp Kikiwaka. You smiled gently and crouched down to her, gently using your finger to gently rub from her head to her mid-back. Mrs. Kipling let out a small hum of a hiss which you always took as enjoyment since she never did much other than scoot a bit closer to you. 

 You were so caught up with the seven foot long lizard that you didn’t notice one of the Grizzly cabin members walking in. 

The person scoffed and walked forward, “Can I help you?” They asked, the familiar accent filling your ears, causing your eye to lightly twitch in frustration.

You stood up and turned to look Ravi Ross in the eyes with a blank expression, “Nope.” You spoke simply, moving your head to the side and walking to the dresser on Xanders side, quickly snatching the bag and walking out the cabin, closing the door behind you.

Ravi rolled his eyes, not even looking back to where you walked away. He simply tilted his head down to Mrs. Kipling and frowned, “Traitor.” He spoke with a huff, walking towards the bathroom.

He never enjoyed the fact that his closest companion enjoyed your presence at all. He thought his best friend since his childhood would at least be on his side, but every day he is proven wrong.

Short exchanges, dirty looks, sighs of frustration, and that was it. That was your dynamic, which the two of you were fine with. Everyone else on the other hand, absolutely hated it.

All of your friends were sat in the middle of the cafeteria as you were helping a camper put up banners and Ravi was on the other side, clipboard in hand, giving other campers directions to follow.

Emma put her head down on the table, “I’m sick of this.” She groaned, lifting her head so her chin would sit on her forearms.

Xander nodded, rubbing circles into her back as he looked around the table. “There’s gotta be something we can do, right?” He asked, looking between the two sides of the cafeteria. “I mean, they’ve been so rude to each other since camp started.”

“I know!” Zuri interjected, “I’m tired of trying to get them to talk by sending them to do my chores.”

Everyone looked over at Zuri with confusion, Lou especially. “For once, I’m going to ignore that you just said that.” The brown haired girl said, turning to face Xander. “I don’t know how we would fix…” She paused, waving her hands in the two general directions, “that.”

Tiffany gently rocked herself, “I mean, if they were forced to be together, maybe that would help.” She suggested to which the table hummed in agreement.

“I know if Gladys told them to be partners on something, they wouldn't be able to argue it.” Jorge nodded to his own words, crossing his arms on the table, “That woman is scary.” He spoke lowly, staring down as if he was getting some sort of flashback to every horrifying thing their camp owner has ever done.

Xanders eyes brightened up and he stood up suddenly, “I have an idea.” He told everyone before rushing off, leaving the group at the table with no explanation.

Before the end of the day, Xander was walking into the cafeteria with the menacing woman herself. She looked…bored to say the least. 

“Campers!” She yelled out, causing the attention to be drawn to her immediately, which she genuinely enjoyed. She sighed before scratching at her leg that was shown under her cargo shorts, “We’re having a camp activity in a few days, something of the sorts of an ‘adventure quest’.” She told the campers surrounding her, air quotes around ‘adventure quest’. Gladys rolled her neck a bit before continuing, “I need two campers to go out to one of our set up camps about half an hour from here to gatherer the supplies from this list.” She explained, paper list in hand  

No one raised their hands so Xander coughed a bit, before whispering into Gladys’s ear.

The woman rolled her eyes and pointed to you, “You, and…” She trailed off, looking around before her sharp gaze set on Ravi, “you.” She spoke, pushing the list into Ravis chest before walking off, not letting either of you argue with the decision. “And you need to leave today! Supplies will be provided by your counselors!” She yelled out her final demand before her footsteps got quieter by the second.

The cafeteria was silent as they watched you and Ravi Ross glare at each other. Everyone was highly concerned whether either of you would return from this trip since neither of you are very team friendly with one another.

Not another word was passed between anyone as you and Ravi walked out, in silence, to your own cabins. Xander and Lou looked at each other, a bit of worry in their glance but they hoped it would work. You two were responsible enough to at least take care of one another if the time came, right?...Right?

Lou sent you on your way with a backpack full of camping gear just in case it took longer to get to the camping site. It was pretty late in the day so she wanted to be safe rather than sorry. She sent you off with ‘Be safe’, ‘Don’t kill each other’, ‘If you see the cases of sodas we hid there, bring back a few cans.”

When you finally walked out of your cabin, away from Lou’s smothering, you found Ravi getting the exact same treatment from Xander, an equally heavy bag on his back. The sight was honestly kind of funny, Xanders hands gripping Ravis shoulders as he gave him a stern ‘talking to’.

After the warnings ended, Ravi turned to go to your cabin, but noticed you were already ready, grin on your face. 

“What’s so funny?”

Your smile dropped, “Let’s just go.” You spoke, turning to the trail path, Ravi following with no complaints as he wanted to get this over with as quick as possible. The two of you passed by your friends and other campers waving you off and wishing you well, telling you both to be careful, which you both would try to.

Once you got to the path, you were met with a fork in the road almost immediately. Ravi suggested right, near the deeper portion of the forest where you’d be able to find more signs for where the campsite was. You suggested left where you guys were closer to the shore of the lake.

Both of you knew that either direction would lead to the camp site since it was just ahead, it wasn’t in the middle of the forest, but it wasn’t on the beach. 

After a bit of debating, you decided to choose Ravis way. His way was helpful as you saw the arrow signs directing you both to the site. You guys were making good time, the sun hadn’t set and you guys were almost there, you were almost hopeful.

Almost. And that almost was crushed the moment Ravi stopped walking.

You nearly ran into his back before stepping to the side, “Why’d you sto-” Your sentence was interrupted when you saw the large sign practically screaming at them ‘WAY BLOCKED, UNSAFE TRAIL’

Both of you groaned, and looked around for another way.

Ravi huffed, “If we go back without even getting to the camp in the first place, Gladys will have our heads.”

“You don’t think I know that?” You snarled, rolling your eyes. “Let’s just try to find a way around.” You spoke, stepping around to find a different trail that went the same direction, but was longer than the original one.

Walking, walking, and more walking with extremely heavy bags and short patience, wasn’t fun. 

“Why did we have to go this way specifically?” Ravi asked, knowing there were two other paths that could have potentially been better than this one.

“Because it’s easier.” you answered quickly, stepping forward, looking around more, using the lasting sunlight to get as far as you could.

“No, it’s no-”

You quickly turned around to face him, “Im sorry.” You spoke suddenly.

“You’re…sorry?” Ravi asked, clearly confused from his expression and tone of voice.

You nodded, “Yes, I’m sorry that you're such a control freak that you can't have anyone but yourself have their way.” You told him with a tilt of your head, a glare forming on your face.

Ravi gave you a sarcastic laugh before pushing past you, continuing to walk. “If you only have insults to spit out, just be quiet.” He told you without turning around.

You simply rolled your eyes before following him.

It was getting dark, dark enough to the point you guys couldn’t see where you were going and you felt like you were going in circles.

Ravi hit his forehead slightly, “You’re the reason that we’re lost, you don’t even know where this trail leads!” He suddenly groaned out, turning towards you, you thought. You couldn't tell, it was pitch black. 

“We’re in the woods, I think we have bigger problems than ‘who got us lost’.” You started, pulling your bag off your back to pull the tent. “Which is you by the way.”

“How is this my fault?” Ravi asked, doing the same as you, pulling out flashlights so neither of you would mess something up with the excuse of it being nightfall.

“You took over walking in the front, you lead us deeper into the woods.”

“And you didn’t want to speak up?”

You turned and faced him, puffing out your chest and holding up your finger, “If you have nothing but insults to say, just be quiet.” You repeated his words before rolling your eyes and turning back to putting up your tent. 

Ravi simply scoffed and went to get firewood, deciding not to talk to you because he felt as if his head was being constantly twisted past its limit when speaking to you.

Over time, he got the fire started, and pulled out some food to cook for you to choose from. You found a pretty good stone slab to set one of your prepared towels onto so you weren’t just placing food on the forest rocks. You also pulled a few snacks out of your bag, tossing a few to Ravi without a word. He turned to you with furrowed brows, confused by your sudden act but you were turned towards the fire, already beginning to fix up the food you guys had brought along.

You both sat in a tense but a more comfortable silence than either of you were used to.

Ravi broke the silence, looking up at you for a moment before looking back down to the snacks he just opened as he waited for you to be done with cooking. “I still think we could’ve taken another path.”

“And I’m still sure the path I chose is less deadly and still faster even though we’re camping out.” You answered, the light glistening in your eyes. 

There was no response to that, so you left it at that…until you heard rustling.

You looked back and noticed only one tent was set up, yours. Ravi seemed to be having trouble with his and you couldn’t even find it in you to laugh, because it really was late. 

“Do you need help?”

“No.”

“It’s been half an hour-”

“I don’t need your help, okay?”

You blinked at him before taking the food off the fire so you wouldn’t burn it. You stood up, brushing yourself off, “You are so incredibly stubborn, to the point that it’s ridiculous.” You stated, walking to him and helping him put in the rods, ignoring his protests. “You hate asking for help, even when you really need it.” You continued on, snapping at him to move to the other side to which he reluctantly followed. “You think you need to do everything yourself, fix everything yourself, for what?” You asked him, finishing the seemingly simple set up of his tent.

Ravi shook his head, choosing to ignore you, sitting on the side of the campfire. 

“It’s as if you think no one sees how hard you’re working, trust me everyone sees it.” You grumbled, crossing your arms as you walked to the other side of the camp fire, “It’s infuriating how hard you try with something you really don’t need to put that much effort in.”

“What about you? Huh?” Ravi interrupted, tilting his head, stepping closer to you. “You just blank on people.”

“Blank on-?”

“When you believe you failed at something, it’s like you go dark in your head .” Ravi explained, expression hardened. “What’s up with that?” He asked, raising a brow. “You do so well in everything and when you don’t get the results you want, you shut down.” 

You blinked at him and looked him up and down, “Why do you watch me so hard to notice that I get into my head?”

“Why do you observe me to the point you notice how hard I work?”

There was silence from the two of you, just a stare from across a dancing fire. A stare of two campers who believed they were comfortable in each other's hate, that they didn’t notice how much they really knew each other more than anyone.

Ravi seemed to be the person who spoke up more, which was surprising, but at the same time it wasn’t. 

He looked away, tongue poking the inside of his cheek, “I don’t ask for help because my parents weren’t much help.” He spoke, sniffling ever so slightly as a distraction to his far off gaze.

“What do you mean?”

“Me and the majority of my siblings are adopted.” He told you, finally turning to look back at you, not expecting your eyes to already be on him. "Since my parents are famous, they have to be gone a lot, so we had nannies.” He began to explain, swallowing harshly, “Those nannies took care of us more than our parents did.”

You furrowed your brows, “So, them sending you to camp…?”

“It's like another nanny situation.” He answered, sighing a bit. “We had nannies as we grew up, and our last nanny was our longest nanny, she was great.” He told you with a small smile, “She was there for years, and honestly was the best person who deserved only great things.” He explained to you fondly to which you listened. “She left so our parents could stay for good, but clearly, that didn’t last that long.”

Your expression formed into something Ravi couldn’t explain, he couldn’t tell if you were sad for him, felt sympathy, but the feeling was comforting since he never really talked to his own siblings about this.

“What I’m trying to say is that there’s a freedom you have when you feel as if you’ve been abandoned.” He swallowed harshly as he tried to explain, “It just kind of sucked because I already felt as if I was abandoned as a child since there was a need for me to be adopted. Going through that twice isn't a good feeling.” Ravi told you, trying to laugh through it. “I don’t ask for help, because I didn’t really get help until our recent nanny, and now that she’s gone, I just don’t have that kind of easy connection to ask anymore.”

You hummed a bit, “I wasn’t necessarily saying you not asking for help is a terribly bad thing.” You told him slowly, tilting your head to the side as you looked away from him. “It’s admirable, you do things on your own, you’re intelligent, I know you’re capable of more than the average person.” You complimented him, to both of your surprise.

Ravi continued to listen, adjusting himself to be more comfortable.

“I was just saying that because it’s worrying.” You answered truthfully. “We keep our conversations short, I know, but I still see you working on millions of projects a day.” You explained, smoothing out your knitted brows, “I’m worried you’re going to drop and that’s when people are going to notice that you’re overworking yourself on things you shouldn’t be overworking yourself on.” You told him, puffing air out of your cheeks.

The boy across the fire nodded a bit at your words, “You weren’t telling me to stop trying so hard because you thought I was irritating, you were saying it because…”

“Camp is where you can relax for a minute, you don’t have to prove yourself in anything that much.” You completed his thought for him. “You are a try hard and it’s annoying, because it’s concerning.”  

“Well, since we’re sharing concerns, why do you shut down?” Ravi asked you, wondering if you’d answer or not.

You chuckled a bit before inhaling deeply, “If things don’t go perfectly for me, I feel as if it was better not trying at all.”

“Why?”

“Because everything I’ve ever done to this point was never good enough unless it was absolutely perfect.”

Ravi hummed a bit, nodding, “Was it because of family?”

You nodded with a bit of a scrunched nose, “It’s hard to let go of what your parents put onto you for your entire life, when they’re not around.” You answered honestly, waving at a few bugs around. “If I don’t get everything perfect, what use will I be to anyone?”

“You’re plenty of use.” Ravi interrupted your words, “You help everyone at camp, even the counselors, even Gladys.” He began to list off, scratching at his neck. “I notice that you get in your head, but now that you’re telling me this… you’re comparing yourself to a standard you’ll never reach.”

“Perfection is reachable, actually, if you try hard enough.”

“Not at camp kikiwaka where the boats are about to fall apart and the food barely looks edible.” He answered with a slightly straight face.

His blank tone and expression caused you to burst out into laughter and nod, “I guess you’re right.”

It was a sudden camp trip where suddenly the two of you felt like you could actually talk to each other. A night of camping where you both realize you had more in common than you actually thought.

A night where neither of you minded that you would be spending extra time with one another to get to the other campsite and back to kikiwaka.

You smiled at Ravi, the food now done as you exchanged stories about your friends and activities you’ve done over the summer. “You know, even though I’m sure we’re lost, I guess I’m glad it’s with you.”

Ravi chuckled and shook his head, rolling his eyes playfully, “Me too.”

[blank-slate-jay]

Shared Warmth

Joel Miller x Male!Reader

Word Count: 6.8k

Summary: Joel brings reader to an abandon home, that he wants to call home for the two of you. Something erotic in Joel ensues seeing you in just your underwear.

Tags: Smut (18+), Anal, Fingering, Dirty Talk, Pet Names, Dom!Joel, Fluff, Established Relationship, no use of (y/n)

A/N: Longest fic I've ever written so far. I don't know how I managed to conjure this! Could've split this into two parts, but decided this is better as one post to make this more cohesive. Enjoy!

AO3! | Reposts are much appreciated!

——————————————————

"You'll see," is what you had received.

A response with very little context, a saying with many different meanings.

You didn't know what to make of this, sitting behind him on the horse with your arms around his waist, you genuinely felt left in the dark. It was very much like Joel to leave you questioning the tones under his voice. Most of the time it was just Joel being Joel, being the closed off man that he was. But the man was in a very good mood, deliberately mocking your naivety with a chuckle.

You sighed, "where are you taking me", saying it more toward yourself than to Joel. Being nearly a day away from Jackson, the question was a reasonable one. After all, what purpose was there to go beyond Jackson for? A gated community was a blessing in times like these, and yet strangely for you, something felt off. Living there has made you feel out of place, made your relationship with Ellie and Joel seemly less meaningful. Perhaps being in a safe haven, with so many people, wasn't truly what you sought.

Bizarre for sure that if you say it out loud, you knew people would call you crazy. You yourself felt you might’ve lost your mind. However, you can’t deny your feelings. Those days, weeks, and months traveling with Joel and Ellie across the country - those were some of the best times you've had even with the looming danger around every corner.

Regardless of what was going through your head, you weren't complaining, being back out into the world. The orange glow of the sun only served to emphasize this notion, piercing through the branches just above your head. It created this relaxing setting, one you can bask in for an unhealthy amount of hours.

"Do you have an idea of where we might be goin'," Joel asked.

Cruel. Just damn cruel, asking you a question you knew he'd leave open ended. Still, you played along.

"I’m assuming it’s pretty big,” after relaying that the man hums finally providing you with a clue, even if its unspecified. “…and that you aren’t playing some trick on me. So, a mall?”

“Try again.”

“A museum?”

“Nope…”

You let out a frustrated grunt, wishing the ladder were true. “Lake?”

Joel took longer to respond, “Mmm,” the man thought about it. “Not quite, it’s close by, but not important.”

You scoffed, placing your head on his shoulder, unsure of what he has disclosed so far is true or not, "Should I already know what it is?" Maybe that'll give you the upper hand.

"I doubt you'd guess this," Joel responses.

"So I'm guessing that a no then?"

The older man nods, turning his head to you before replying with a, 'Yeah'. There was no use in trying by that point. The constant persistence wasn't doing you both any favors. Joel probably had a reason to keep it secretive, so why spoil it? Knowing ahead would've made the trip less intriguing, if not boring. And on the bright side, what'll come will actually be a surprise.

Rather than playing into Joel's trickery you let it go, lifting your head back up, "Alright you won, I forfeit."

"Finally givin' up."

You reply, “I think I have too. I’ve ran out of ideas,” you lied just exhausted by the mind tricks, “Unless you want me to keep going?”

Joel partly wanted you to continue, to get back at you for all the times you fucked with him. He was starting to understand the fun in it now and why you did it to him. He settled for one more jab at you, “Will you get it a right this time?”

"Shut it" you giggle, bumping the man's thighs with your legs. Your comment did do the trick, as Joel fell silent after your remark. You could tell the man was smiling though; his rising cheek gave it away. Some of you was certainly rubbing off onto him, to know the man was now more comfortable with you was flattering.

Joel then reaches down for your leg, placing his hand right over your kneecap, caressing it like it was precious. “Don’t worry now, sugar. We’ll be there shortly.”

His considerate touch, that softness in his voice. Those two components together were enough to send a warm feeling throughout your body. How easy Joel could just captivate you by his touch alone, you guessed that was just how love worked.

You nodded your head as if he could see you, humming to acknowledge his words. Again you laid your head against him, face now between the back of his bare neck and the collar of his blue shirt. Closing your eyes, you let yourself listen to the sounds of nature around you to pass the time.

---

Sometime later, you found yourself opening your eyes to the sound of Joel's voice. Your vision, well adjusted to the growing darkness of dusk, focused on the dirt path some feet away.

"We're here," Joel says, spiking your interest enough to get your full attention. You lean back from the man's frame, hands rubbing the bags under your eyes.

Taking a look at the dirt path, you gaze in both direction. One leading deeper into the forest and the other extended out into a clearing. You confusingly study the area, unable to spot anything of interest. No water, no structure, not even a tree with any unique properties. You couldn't help feeling a bit bewildered, some of that feeling escaping through your lips with a quick 'Umm'. Stealing a glance at Joel's side profile, you tried reading what little you could see of his face.

He nods, "Good. You're awake. It's just this way," he explains, spurring the horse to get them moving in the direction of the dirt path.

Huffing in relief you spoke, "Phew, not gonna lie you almost got me there," thinking Joel might've been toying with you still. He turns his head to you, claiming that he wasn't going to bring you out there for nothing. If the man had told you that some time ago, you would have a hard time believing him.

Trotting forward, the horse comes into close proximity of the tree lines. Just on the other side you could barely see something faint between the leaves; a building of sorts. By what you could see the distance made it difficult to tell with the addition of nature covering your view. The universe really made things difficult for you. For what what it was worth, you were sure Joel didn't want you to see it until you stepped out into the open field. Still, the suspense was killing you.

This wasn't going to last any longer as Joel turns the horse right into the clearing. The tree's now finally out of view, you were hit with the red beam from the sun, blinded by your curiosity and in exchange being blinded by the sun in return.

You squint some, grunting as your gaze trailed around the perimeter. There was lots of tall grass, a noticeable transition compared to the on's just behind them. It stretched far beyond what your eyes could already see. Of course your mind was then caught up by the building some distance away.

There was a house. Someone's house. A house, that looked to be in good conditions. Surprisingly the lone tree just beside it has yet to infect the home with any vines. It made you believe that someone had to have lived here not too long ago. That person was one lucky bastard to have that home to themselves, you thought, imagining how nice the interior had looked.

"Ain't that something", Joel spoke, pretending as if it was his first time being there.

You comment, "Looks lively." A good point compared to everything the two of you had seen on the way there.

But Joel corrected you, "It's empty actually, has been for awhile". You let out a quick 'Huh', taking in his words, further scanning the house. The sidings are a tinted white, slightly scrapped on some parts of the wall. The dark colored roof, contrasting with the siding, made the home brighter than it already seemed. The house stood tall, two stories at most based off the windows, with the first floor being linked with the porch.

It was both funny and disheartening how attached you felt to this home already compared to the one you, Joel, and Ellie shared in Jackson. You kill to live in a home like this, not that you hated your existing home, just this one felt...right to you. Exterior alone, it reminded you of your old house pre-outbreak.

"Can we go in," you asked. A silly question, like you needed Joel's permission to enter the desolate property.

Joel responded sarcastically, dragging out the phrase "Nooo", with his gruffy voice. You knew he was only kidding and was now becoming intrigued by what was inside. Even so, the invasive feeling creeping up your stomach didn't go away yet. You looked around, taking in a full scope of the area. You trusted Joel of course, something that had improved since you first met. But your vigilant, alert mind hadn't shifted in the slightest; only improved thanks to being with Joel.

You turn your head around, looking behind you and at the edges of the tree lines to ensure that no one was following or coming. Like it even mattered, Joel had already assured your safety. You guessed it was better safe than sorry.

With your head now facing to the left, you gaze over to the far side of the field. So far that walking there would be ineffective. The field, a tad bit sloped, dragged on into the distance stretching too far for you to even consider. The sun made the entire sight something you'd see only from a painting or photograph. Sure enough, Joel wasn't lying from earlier when he confirmed there was a lake, just far off at the ends of the slope.

Joel steady the horse, grabbing the reins tightly to slow her down to a halt. "Alright," the man sighed. You let go of his waist as he began to move, his boots shaking the stirrups while he steps down from the horse. He then reaches his hand up to you. You gladly took it, allowing the man to pull you down.

You thanked him, a small smile stretching across the side of your face as you looked at the older man. He reciprocated your gesture with a smile of his own, one that made the wrinkles near his eyes stand out. He didn't have to mutter a word for you to know that he heeds your words.

The man turned his attention then to the horse, letting go of your hand in the process. He grabbed the reins and moved the horse over to tie it up to on of the porch's pillars. While he does so, you made your way up the few stairs, the wood creaking beneath your shoes.

Your hands trailed along the rails, rough and also smooth against your skin. Your eyes darting up and down the walls. Closely the walls looked more worn down, not too badly but could use some improvement.

You turned to look back at Joel who was slinging his bag over his shoulder. The man brushes his hand by your arm and passes by you. He walked up to the door before pushing it open. He moves his back agains the open frame, "Come".

Peaking inside for a moment, there was no way the house was empty like Joel had inferred. "Empty, huh. Doesn't look the way to me.", you look at the man with a snarky look on your face.

He looked unfazed by your humor, the man's face falling a bit flat. It reminded you of the times he'd looked at you after having to endure some of your playful banter. Those times were fun back when you traveled the country together with Ellie.

"Get in" he insisted, sounding annoyed but also seconds away from chuckling.

You don't push your luck and brush by the man still with that look on your face as you pass by him. To wipe that look off your face, Joel smacks your backside causing you to yelp; biting his lips in sync. It was a bastard move, but you weren't complaining. Looking back at him was either rewarding or a mistake cause he was making the face you familiarizes yourself with, best described as hunger. God. Choosing your next action carefully was smart cause anything that insight him to grab and kiss you, would lead to something more...erotic.

Not giving into temptation, you turn your attention to the living space ahead, balling your hand into a fist and squeezing it with the other hand. "This is...quite the place," you stated, stepping further into the home. You weren't kidding. The place had an aura very reminiscent of a cabin, the amount of woodwork around the living room alone gave you that impression. However, the house looked and felt homey all the same.

You walked up to a small craved out sculpture, shaped like a bull, placed above the small fire place. While inspecting it's form you brought up a question, "How'd you find all this?"

"Me and Tommy we're riding out", he started as the man trailed over to the wall to place his bag down, "And I wanted to do some more exploring but Tommy wanted to go back. So I let him and luck would have you..," the man finishes by raising his arms up some like he was revealing something grand, "...got my hands on this."

You nod, looking away from him to fiddle with the small bull, "Cool, it's like a comfy outpost. I like it". You then used the bull like a pointer, motioning it in the man's direction, "You weren't gonna hold out on us were you?"

Joel shook his head, making his way over to you. "Firstly this isn't a toy," he says, grabbing the small figure out of your hand. He places it back into its original spot before resuming, "And secondly, I was going to tell you, specifically just you about this place."

He was? You raised an eyebrow in question, wondering what significance a place like this would even have. It wasn't somewhere you'd visited with Joel before, nor was it a house that held any meaning to you prior to arriving. So what gives? "Just me", you muttered.

The man smirked some, finding it adorable how dumbfounded you appeared. He stepped closer to you, close enough to where you could feel the warm heat from his nostrils flaring against your face. “Yeah, just you”, he repeated, his voice now closer to a whisper. 

You could feel his hand grasping at yours as you kept your eyes locked with his. “I’m sorry, I feel I’m missing something here”. The man, obviously still listening, lifts your hand up to his own face, gently rubbing it against his cheek. His scruffy beard, pricked your palm as you cupped the man’s face. 

The man wondered if he should even answer. Your palm, tender against his rough skin nearly made him forget how to speak. Made him almost forget what you had even asked. He had held it longer than he should've, feeling slightly guilty for holding something like this off from you. He felt you inquired more than enough today. 

With your palm, slowly being squished between the man's hand and cheek he explains, "I got this for us. At Tommy's...I know things have been different between us since we got there. We, spend a lot of time outside of town, sometimes don't even spend time with each other much anymore. I thought it'd be nice to have our own space again, you know away from...everything. When I found this it just clicked for me. Felt like we could call this place home."

Your face was at ease, hearing him say what had been on your mind, spiked your attraction to the man further than you thought was possible. Every word, every sentence hit the mark for you. For a moment, you could swear he had to have read your mind at some-point. Either that or being with you had made it easy to determine what was bothering you. Regardless, having a place faraway for yourselves sounded too good to deny, especially when it was exactly what you wanted.

You couldn't quite put your thoughts into words, simply letting out a confused giggle, unsure of how to follow up on Joel's reveal.

Joel takes notice of this, captivated once more by your expression. He then breaks the silence, "You've asked a whole of questions. Now let me ask you this, how do you feel about living here with me, sunshine."

You nodded immediately, maybe a bit too quickly and possibly too eagerly. "I'd...love to," the words finally falling out of your mouth.

The man response, turning his head some to kiss your palm between an utter, "Good." His lips softly trailed down, like he was following the curved lines on your hand. Each kiss felt delicate, purposeful, each with some kind of meaning supposedly. That was just within Joel's transcended mind, he couldn't help himself, he got lost quickly whenever he'd feel your touch.

You leaned yourself forward, pulling your hand away from his mouth to wrap it around the back of his neck. Tugging him forward you embrace him, finding his hips as a comfortable spot to rest your free hand. No surprise, Joel indulged, pulling you into his arms too.

The two of you stood for some time, merely appreciating and savoring the moment of intimacy. You didn't think any words could pinpoint how much you loved Joel. Not even the word ‘loved’ felt like it was doing him justice. It was beyond that.

“What did I do to deserve you," he mutters above your ear.

“Luck," you say.

He hums, knowing it to be true but hating the notion of life without you, fighting for you made it all worth something, made it mean something. He made small circles around your back, just being grateful he had you now, thankful that you made it to this point to be there in his arms.

"I'm making dinner," Joel says, catching you off guard for a moment. "Got the ingredients for your favorite."

You knew what he was talking about, it was meal you'd two shared before and you couldn't keep quiet about your enjoyment of the dish, even while eating the damn thing.

Luck would have you, again, you were about to experience that meal again.

---

You turned the running faucet of the soothing shower off, grabbing the towel just off the shower's hinges to wrap yourself in its warmth. Stepping out the tub, you began to dry yourself, wiping away all the sweat you'd built up after leaving Jackson. Once knowing this new place had running water, you were quick to jump for the shower, never skipping the opportunity to get yourself clean.

Joel was just downstairs prepping dinner for the two of you. You wondered if it was already finished since you spent way too long wandering the upstairs plane; checking the available rooms before finding the shower. You were sure it wasn't even done yet since Joel would've called out for your name by that point.

Wiping away the last remnants of water, you threw on some spare clothing, a shirt and just your underwear, from your backpack before stepping out the restroom. The cooler air hit your body, nothing you wouldn't accept since the season was a lot warmer; spring.

You made your way into the master bedroom. In this case, your shared room with Joel. Not much was in it. Compared to the other bedroom, which hosted nothing at all, this one at least had a bed and a few dressers. You weren't complaining since the room felt less compacted and more freeing.

Walking into the room you toss your towel onto the bed, taking in the open space, a stark contrast to your room back in Jackson. The thought of what you could implement to this room had your mind racing momentarily. Like what you could put within the corners or whether you should put any entertaining devices in the room. Maybe not the last part probably cause Joel would advise keeping those contained to the living room.

It got you pretty thrilled thinking about what you could do in general now that you weren't limited to a communities resources. This of course meant you didn't have as much to work with, but everything you gathered would or could be used to further improve your new home.

You started comparing your home back in Jackson to the one you have here. Down to it's interior, format, and spacing. You thought about the kitchen, dinning area, your shared room, Ellie's room. Ellie. Again you thought about her, a realization hitting you in the process. 'Fuck' you sighed under your breath. So caught up and enthralled by a nice change of environment, you hadn't even thought about her wellbeing.

At the moment, she was at Tommy and Maria's place, likely giving them a hard time as you'd expect. The usual for Ellie. But being so far away from her, not being there for her made you somewhat fazed; a pinch of disgrace too. That girl was tough and she needed to grow up around people to understand what it's like to live. But on the other hand, she'd follow you and Joel to the ends of the earth, she said it herself.

Throughout the wave of thoughts, washing within your head, you were by the window now. Hands perched up on the dresser just below the glass's border. The spot made for a great place to reflect. Perhaps this would be a good position to do it, overlooking the grassy plains, it gave your head a hub place to ponder.

If it weren't for you being lost in your thoughts, you would've been aware of the man standing by the door frame watching you; completely out of eyesight. Joel, leaning up on the frame with his arm, exhales an exaggerated sigh to catch your attention.

You turn, startled by the sudden noise. Realizing it was just Joel you relaxed. "You almost gave me a heart attack," you joked.

His presence definitely lightened you up, giving you something to distract yourself from any thoughts running in your head. You'd talk out how to settle Ellie's situation with Joel, it'll work out; you knew it would with Joel by your side.

"Sorry" he started, his eyes gazing upon your exposed legs. "Dinner's ready."

You nod, "Alright. I'll be down in a bit."

You thought after relaying this to Joel, that he'd leave and wait for you downstairs. But he didn't move, his figure remaining still as his eyes stayed focus on you. He nods too, but it seemed more that he did it subconsciously since his eyes weren't locked with yours.

The look was back and more prominent than ever. The dark look that you avoided earlier, was calling out for you to let him have you. Mixed with the half smile across his face made for a deadly combo.

You tried being clever, looking about the room to see if your bag was in sight. It wasn't, but you were sure it was still in the restroom after changing out your clothes. "I'm gonna grab my pants, really quick-"

"You don't have to" Joel says, his fingers playing with his nails. "I think you look fine already."

Failed, you tried getting to see if the man would hold off, tried keeping him at bay at least until you both were in bed. But no, you only drew more attention to your undergarments. To make matters even worse, Joel's gruff voice had caused a twitch between your legs. A slight growth a hardness, noticeable by both of you.

Joel bit his lips, taking his weight off of the door, "You're not too hungry, right?"

This was the one time where choosing your words carefully would be wise at the moment. However, you felt there was no turning back now. He wanted you, now. And you wanted him more. You sheepishly shook your head, "Not really", finally falling for the man's glare.

While you spoke, Joel already had closed the gap between you too, looking into your eyes for a moment. He hooks the front of your trousers with his finger, pulling you closer to him until his lips were locked with yours. You inhaled deeply, feeling a tingle shake your spine.

He cups the sides of your face, passionately parting his lips to slide his tongue inside. Fast as Joel was to get things going, you accepted. The warmth elevated by the mixing of each others taste made the tightness in your underwear uncomfortable.

Joel's huffs deeply into the kiss, his grip, grew stronger with each passing second. His weight started to shift your stance, causing you to back up until you hit the dresser behind you. You grunted against his mouth, not letting the movement stop you from continuing to brush your tongue against his.

Both moaning and breathing heavily, you grab at his collar shirt, playing with one of the buttons to get it open. You tried getting him to undress, a chance taken from you when he grabs your wrist tightly. The man wanted nothing but to feel your skin against his own. He wanted to savior the moment. He liked the build up, he loved the anticipation.

His hands were free from your face, but they soon started invading your shirt. He rampaged through it, running them around your shirt before sticking them in by your sides. You tremble at his touch. His hand created a warm sensation on your skin, reminding you of the times he’d draw circles on your back whenever you’d lay in bed together.

For you, gripping his jawline pulled you two closer, crotches colliding too. It peaked Joel’s interest, his eyebrows raising between the groans against your lips. Joel’s jeans made it difficult to tell, but it was clear you were hard, just as hard as he was. That got him to smile into the kiss, proud he could get you really erect quickly.

You parted your lips from his, only a few inches apart. You used the moment to catch some air, something you knew you wouldn't be granted later the further you proceed.

You questioned his smile, "What?" "Nothing," he says, his accent rolling off the tip of his tongue. "Just you". He waits a moment before throwing himself back into the fray, wanting your lips to be sealed with his.

Aggressive, he pushes you harder against the dresser, unintentionally crushing you moments before dipping down to grab your legs and halting you onto the wooded surface. The dresser creaked, not adapted to a person being onto but that didn't concern either of you. The man caress your thigh, slow and aimlessly, while his other hand yanked at the front of your underwear once more.

He wanted you to take them off so badly and you didn't waste a moment. You shook yourself, getting enough room under you to slip them off. Joel helped, his steaming breath hitting your slowly exposing skin made you pick the pace up. He help fully get them off, letting the cloth hit the ground. His gaze fixed on your now exposed erection made him forget to breathe.

“Now your turn”, you said.

Rubbing his hands down your legs, he reaches down for his zipper to unbuckled his pants. His belt clicked and his pants loosened, dropping everything done to the floor with a thud. He swiftly took his underwear off too, slipping it fully off and sliding everything off to the side with his feet.

You let out a shaky exhale, your eyes so baffled by how hard his cock was; rock solid and strictly standing upward. Your started pondering if you could even take it. Under these conditions you would have to take him raw. There had to be something to use, you thought something to make it easier for him.

“Hey”, Joel’s voice soft on your ears. He tilts your head up to hold your gaze, “Eyes on me.” He slowly caresses the features on your face, adoring just how amazing your eyes looked and how kissable your lips were. Those lips, looking at them intently he slips his thump across the bottom half. He wanted to nibble on them, gently bite to leave a mark on them; to leave evidence of his pass doings.

He used his other hand to play with your cock, making sure you were staying hard for him. You assisted him with your palm overlapping his; working in unison. It was subtle and worked to keep you both pleasured while focusing on the man.

Joel dipped his finger between your lips, “Open your mouth, baby”. Your lips separated and he slid his finger in. A bitter taste hit the roof of your mouth as he swirled his finger around. “Get it nice and wet for me. Gonna need it for the hole of yours.”

So this was the alternative. Normally you and Joel would talk about using some sort of cream for sex. With seemingly none around to use, your mouth would have to do. You started sucking on his finger for a bit, his thick finger, took up a good portion of your mouth. Not enough to suffocate like his cock, but enough to make you think about how to manage your tongue’s movement. After the first finger he switched it out for another, a small line of saliva leaking out every time he’d pull out.

Three finger were soaked now, three fingers you were sure would break you, more than his cock would. You shiver, trying to estimate the width of his fingers with that of his cock. It served no purpose other than question your capabilities. What good did that do you, especially now?

Joel releases your cock, and trails his hands down to your balls. You knew where he was headed, this wasn’t your first rodeo with Joel. You lifted your leg up, leaning back onto one elbow to keep yourself upright. Joel effortlessly threw your hovering leg over his shoulder, getting a view of what he’d been dying to see. Your hole, albeit at an angle was still visible and accessible which was the only thing that mattered to Joel.

The man, looked to your eyes for conformation, he wanted to make sure you were ready. There wasn't a hint of denial in your face, Joel loved that look.

Coming into close contact, he circles around your entrance. His rough fingers toyed with your hole, allowing the sensations to prepare you for his soon to come entry. God the feeling alone was making you wish he just put himself inside you, knowing it might hurt but still wanting him to push deep in.

No longer waiting, Joel pushes a finger inside, slowly. You narrowed your brows, the walls of your ass being breached caused a slight spark in your stomach. His finger slid relatively easily, getting your breathing to become shakier than before. It was nothing you couldn't take and his finger was satisfying, it might've been enough to make you cum. His second finger though, made itself known too, pushing in with the first.

You winced, wishing Joel had warned you. Two thick fingers inside was about right, it felt about the size of Joel's cock at it's hardest. Staying with this rhythmic push and pull inside your hole made you believe you were ready for him to fuck you. But one other finger remained, one still damp and set to go.

A yelp escaped your lips feeling the third join the other two. It hurt for sure, causing you to throw your head back as a jolt reaction. You bump the glass pane behind you, the light outside barely shining onto the side of your face. You reached up to grab at Joel's collar, the fabric bringing some level of comfort with it's pure softness.

"Relax..." the man groans.

Fuck you wanted to, but how could you when the man was expanding your ass with every thrust. It made you grip his collar tightly as you kept your eyes tight to prevent it a tear from falling. The feeling was both painful and enjoyable, the tingles running up your stomach never ceased and neither did the sting in your hole.

You started to tell, no, insist that he fuck you. It escaped your mouth through a whine, a part of you wanting him to just remove a finger or two to let you relax. You knew it had purpose, you knew why he was pushing your limits. The longer you held, the easier it would be for him to push himself inside of you. Still you begged, "Please...Joel...take me, just fuck me."

Through your closed eyelids you couldn't see the man, shamelessly smirking, "Oh yeah? Tell me how bad you want it, sugar pie."

You gasp, "Bad".

He groans, "Yeah?". He licks his lips, "Want me to go really deep in there, want to me fuck you real good."

"Uh...huh"

He pushes fingers deeper than usual "How badly?"

You gasped, "Really fucking bad. FUCK".

Joel groans, acknowledging your plead. If you wanted it that badly, he wish you told him sooner. He pulls his fingers out, the sounds of your hole getting him excited. It was wet now, just the way he liked it. In one swift motion, Joel flings your other, idle leg over his shoulder and yanks you forward until your backside was against his crotch. His cock, bumping into your balls got another sound out of you.

You relax into the dresser the best you could, letting your elbows rest and leaning your head back until it was laying against the glass again. It wasn't the most comfortable positions for your neck, you didn't pay much mind to this though as Joel began running his hands up your thighs. With your legs so close to his face, he also started leaving kisses and bite marks you knew would be visible the next day. He wasn't about to let you off without at least some marking, whether it'd be visible later or hidden by your clothes didn't concern him.

Breathing hard against your skin, his gaze turns back to his hard-on. He reaches for it, while overlooking your body. He lines it up to your hole pushing, not inside of you yet, but rather around the exterior.

Again with the teasing, you thought, wanting to roll your eyes but refusing to try. Did the man not tire of his own nonsense? You shifted your hip toward his cock, physically telling him to knock it off and shove it in you.

He locks eyes with you then, seeing your desperate and longing expression. You chewed down on your lips, seeing how the man's eyes had darken since last you laid upon them. He just smirked, looking down between your legs before pushing himself in.

It hurt but not as much as his fingers. The aftermath of those three invaders acted as a testament to how well you could still take the man in strides. For what it was worth, they did make it easier for him to slide into you.

He slipped in and out easily, smooth like butter. His thrust started methodically, getting familiar with your hole's interior again. He groaned, his cock pulsating against the edges, trying to find your sweet spot.

He wasn't able too, it wasn't that easy. You had laid there making hush moans that could only be audible for anyone within the room. It was striking and incredibly hot to Joel hearing you try to conceal your voice. It came off is if you were going to burst, like you were going to scream out his name, that was something else entirely.

Thinking about it gave him a surge, a rush that rapidly increases his pace. His hips smacking up against your ass, created a sound that vibrated your body. Each smack, was music to the man's ears, meld together now with your rising grunts. It probably was the best thing he'd ever heard.

You were losing it on the other hand. Your body trembled, your eyes became hazy, your mind completely in shambles; a mess best described it all. So much so that you had no idea what was even happening, questioning what was even real.

Were you becoming stupid with each thrust or did you completely lose your mind to him. His strides were beginning to make you see stars, more pleasing than the ones you'd see in the sky. A sudden overwhelming feeling rushes from your stomach all the way to your head, the strongest sensation you've felt all day. It made you feel light, like you had been consumed by the clouds.

This strange halt in your mind lasted for a minute before coming back from being on autopilot. You were semi-confused as your body was on a softer surface now. Your body lays flat, Joel's entire weight on top of you. Your senses were coming back to you.

The dresser was no longer your resting place but rather it was now the bed. Joel had lifted you up moments ago, still inside you, and crashed you both onto the mattress. Surprisingly that didn't snap you out of it, but what was even more confusing was the wetness near your stomach, just in between your stomach and Joel's. It was quite sticky. Wait, you stopped your mind from racing, ignoring Joel's rough groans in your ears for a second. You already came, you totally did. Your cock didn't feel restrained nor was it in any desire need to let loose any longer.

Shit, you thought, not realizing the man had satisfied you. You got lost in thought due to him hitting your sweet spot, it explained why your mind went into a frenzy. The feeling sent you over the edge again, jolting you back to reality this time; he hit it again.

You cry out as a response.

"Fuck, I'm gonna blow, I'm gonna fucking blow". Joel groaned.

You couldn't speak a word, it was too much, too much to bear. You dug your nails into the back of his shirt and pulled him closer with your legs around his waist. Your strength was dwindling, and you didn't have the voice to tell him to finish. If he kept it up any longer you were surely gonna cum again.

Joel's voice was deafening against your ears, his rhythm completely erratic and harsh against your hole. He went all out, posting himself up onto his elbows and thrusting into you like it was his last. He could feel the sharpness on his back, a deep sting from you nails pushing further into his skin. He watched as tears rolled down your face, wanting nothing but to wipe them away. He was right there, he could feel it rising up.

A few more rough thrusts did the trick. Joel grunted, holding his breath for a second as his cock convulsed before blowing. It came out fast, faster than he expected, squirting strings of cum in succession against your interior. He squinted his eyes, as he came quickly back down to your neck.

Joel's cock had settled, just as the two of you were. Exhausted beyond belief, you felt weak, one of your slipping off the man's back. You both relish in each other's touch, your breaths becoming steady at last.

The man's body shifts, causing you discomfort from still being inside of you. He reaches down to pull out, a quiet groan breaking free from your sealed lips. He used his other hand to cup and rub your cheek, his way of showing his gentleness after the affair. The man's cum oozed out, running down onto the mattress. You could feel how wet and loose it had become. Compared to the last time Joel had fucked you, you weren't as messy as you were now.

He then looked over to the side, seeing the towel you had used from earlier. He grabs it and wipes away the stains on your stomach.

You let out a sigh followed by locking eyes with Joel. They looked a lot more calmer, vibrant even just by his soothing demeanor.

As he finished wiping you clean the corner of his lips rose, "We should go eat."

Just like that, he had nothing left to say, acting as if nothing just happened. You scoffed at how quick the man could go from wanting to devour you to being a sensual man who wanted to give you the world. You weren't ready to rise from your position, not yet. You yank the towel out of his grasp before pulling him back down onto you.

Dinner can wait, just a bit longer.