#it kinda comes with the area I live in tbh but like. good GOD

[nightcorecarseatheadrest]

Looking at the rich girls from my school having their own party buses for their birthdays and going to fancy restaurants 😭😭 last year I invited three people to my house and we played Mario kart with my drifting joycons and had to peel out wax paper from in between the cake layers because my dad accidentally left it on while he frosted it and I had the time of my life.

[shiggyscumrag]

WHOLESOME THOUGHTS WITH SHIGGY!

I've been looking back at my old fics and headcanons and mu god has my writing style and interests changed. So I've decided to make an updated HORNY THOUGHTS WITH SHIGGY!!!! Tbh most of them are gonna be wholesome <3 Bakugou has been on my mind A LOT lately so we're gonna start with him!!

Wholesome headcanons

I feel like sometimes when he gets home from patrol he is either a cuddle bug or doesn't want to be touched at all. Being a pro hero puts a lot of strain on the body! So when he comes home more emotionally exhausted sometimes he likes being cuddled and being taken care of. However when he comes home from a patrol that was particularly cruel on his muscles he prefers to just kinda lay there and not be touched.

I love two ideas. Bakugou either not being to handle his liquor at all OR being able to take shot after shot and not feel a thing but hate the taste and doesn't like to drink very often because of it. Like he'll go party with you and friends but he usually won't drink unless it's a special occasion. For the light weight version he would take shot for shot with you on a holiday (New years, Birthday, etc) and after the second shot he's fuckinf gone. Like he's there but snaps back into reality every 5 secs but he just looks so cute with the blush from the heat of the alcohol under his skin. Or on the heavy weight side he would also take shot for shot with you only getting tipsy as you reach your limit. Let's say around 5 shots for fun. He says to you "I'm glad you're done cause that tastes like shit." He just hates the alcohol taste.

I'm not a huge fan of baths. Like I hate them. So in this headcanon Bakugou would instead take showers with you rather than baths. Or if you wanted company while taking a shower but he didn't want to go in he would just sit on the counter and talk to you, read a book or scroll through his phone possibly looking for new recipes. And I course you would do the same thing for him!!

If you were an artist of any sort (I'm an art major give me a break) he would absolutely adore the home made gifts you'd make him. When you guys eventually move into your first place together he would hang up the gifts you gave him in his office or around the living areas. When guests came over and complimented the piece he would always subtly brag that you painted it and he can only have the best art pieces in his home because he has the best artist in the world living with him and making him custom peices. Also if he ever did a charity event and needed like a design or logo he would come to you either asking advice or commission you to do it. Fuck asking for it for free, even though you'd tell him you'd do it free of charge since you're dating and it's charity. But he INSISTS on paying you because you deserve it for all the hard work, love and care you put into it.

He would give you the aux in the car everytime. He knows you usually ask everytime if he has any requests and just queues them in between songs you like so it works out fine for him. You're happy he's happy, nothing to complain about.

However you met (preferably outside of UA) he would find it pretty important that early on in the relationship that he introduces you to his friends (kiri, mina, denki, and sero) just so he can see how you would fair around them. I mean he's around them 24/7 practically so it's important you get along. They are like family to him so it's also important they approve of you, even though he says he doesn't give a shit about their approval.

He secretly loves when you feel up his muscles. It just makes him feel good. He also likes when you rub his back with your nails. It just feels so nice, especially after a day of training and or patrol. It's the perfect relaxer. I feel he would also like it if you rubbed his temples gently when he laid his head in your lap. It could honeslty soothe him right to sleep.

Not so wholesome headcanons (18+ MDNI)

Biting? Check. Choking? Check. An occasional creampie? ...Check. Sorry just had to check off some of the kinks I think Bakugou would indulge in and fantasize about.

Bakugou is a pretty aggressive guy. Some might even say he's a bit mean sometimes. Cruel even. Never to you though. He can get very possessive though. The way he questions when anyone other than his friends and family talk about you. The arm around you at all times in public. The marks that litter your skin underneath your clothing. Oh yeah, he likes to mark you. He swears it's all for your pleasure, I mean you do love the occasional hickey and the way it feels when he bites and sucks on your skin. But it is a bit much when they cover almost all of the entirety of your body. Of course only the parts he can see and possibly sometimes a few on your neck when he's really worked up.

If he decided to do a little quicky in a semi public place he would most definetely let you bite down on his shoulder. Which I feel would be a rarity just cause he'd rather not deal with the possible repercussions of getting caught. He doesnt mind the pain. Like at all. Actually it helps him get off a little bit. It gives him just the right amount of pain and pleasure to get him going absolutely feral.

Some of his fav positions include: normal cowgirl aka riding him into oblivion, reverse cowgirl aka riding him into oblivion just with more ass, doggy, missionary, mating press, you riding his face. The list could go on.

[sodapopsolstice]

Homestuck^2 sucked because none of the trolls actually aged like they were supposed to. Like the humans aged (even though they're MEANT to be immortal and dont give me they're mentally 40+ JOHN NO LONGER FITS IN HIS GOD TIER SUIT HE HAS AGED) but we don't ever see the natural development of the trolls.

Vriska, Aradia and Sollux I can kinda give leeway since they've went through timelines and dreambubbles and double death and half death and yada yada those 3 are kinda fucked up timeline wise so I kinda see why they never aged.

But Terezi, Karkat and Gamzee? No fucking excuse.

Kanaya is a grey area however cause you know she's "Kanaya The Vampire Fashion Queen" but like no credible sources I can find SAY anything about age when it comes to rainbow drinkers and I can't find out if The Dolorosa was actually a rainbow drinker so we don't have a naturally lived rainbow drinker example so I'm just gonna have to assume Kanaya ages like a regular troll.

However, the other 3 have no right to not be ageing. For example, I'm gonna pull up a image of Commander Vantas here:

It's hard to tell with Cmdr. Vantas because THE ONLY TIME WE SEE HIS FACE IS IN HERO MODE OR IN A LIGHTING AND SITTING DOWN anyways. But with what we are given with Cmdr. Vantas he DOES in fact give signs he has aged, not as much as he should of, by this point he should have gotten a good bit taller than the humans and have completely red eyes, but it's better than THIS

what the fuck. Meat Karkat SHOWS NO SIGNS OF AGING AT ALL HE LOOKS THE EXACT SAME AS HE DID WHEN HE WAS 13 WHEN HE IS 20 AT BARE MINIMUM and you may think im overreacting, cause obviously its just his symbolic sprite he doesn't ACTUALLY look like that

You buffoon, you oaf take at look at this. HE ISN'T AGING IN THE SLIGHTEST IN MEAT.

Other than artstyle and change of clothes he looks the fucking same, at this point in HS^2 he should be looking like The Signless but he doesn't even look older than Kankri. But maybe Karkat is a bad example maybe the poor guy has a case of eternal babyface and he's just cursed to look 13 forever.

Let's take a look at Gamzee instead.

There's so little images I could find off sight of Gamzee in hs^2 and I did NOT want to be on that buggy ass website for long so this is the best you're getting. As expected, Gamzee ALSO has a case of chronic babyface and it's especially egregious as he's the descendant of THE GRAND HIGHBLOOD.

Tbh this is actually kinda a good image since we can semi eye measure Vrissy and Gamzee. Of which Gamzee seems imo taller than Vrissy, not in massive hulking beast like GHB but like and adult man to a 15 year old, which would be normal and expected IF HE WASN'T AGAIN THE DESCENDANT OF THE GRAND HIGHBLOOD.

That guy is literally known in fandom for 2 things, being pissed off and being huge, again Gamzee follows the trend of not having the adult troll characteristics of dark grey skin and whilst his horns are red due to being hero mode and we can't see his eyes i think we can assume he probably doesn't have some nice lavender lookers on him.

And there is a reason why I've spent the last 1 or 2 hour complaining about obtuse homestuck lore and it's simple it shows a lack of care.

It shows that Homestuck^2 on the surface is a mediocre at best adaptation of Homestuck but as soon as the thin surface layer is scrapped away, it shows a hollow project, it shows a project that generally proves itself to be a homestuck thing but it doesn't show passion, I could probably right now find you any HS fan and ask them what makes adult trolls different to young trolls and they could probably easily tell me how and why. So why couldn't a whole team of people attempt at the very least, a version like that?

Its little things like the trolls not aging/aging like humans to the damn table to the lack of acknowledgement for already accepted and semi canonised reps of queer culture in favour for rep that punches down to the outright ridiculous swivels in personality that's prove to me at least that HSE and HS^2 were dead on arrival.

[harufallinwonderland]

My twst x precure brainrot

(note this is kinda my first tumblr post so far from fancy or good and this was not proof read at all more of just A info dump then A full on fic) Ok SO I’ve seen A grand total of 3 posts about twst x precure today and I have been coming up with twst x precure stuff for months so i had motivation to post stuff today thank you shinysparklessapphires for the motivation to post this (to nervous to @ someone tbh)

Today topic is the start of my dumb idea for A twst x precure au i came up with when bored in school it's mostly how the prologue would be changed

In this au it’s A modern au where Yuu is A foreign exchange student to night raven collage which is A school in Sage town (following the precure trend of made up towns) although there seemed to have been A mistake as they weren’t meant to be the one exchange and crowley like the idiot he is sent over the wrong file of the students meant for the exchange program and now yuu is nations away from home and it would ruin his rep if he sent them back with A simple “oopsie” so he keeps them here which lead to them eventually meeting A cat fairy named Grim and some misadventures leading to becoming friends with Ace and Deuce and becoming A precure and learning of the big threat of the precure and that there far from the only precures in this city no less school

The events of the prologue are edited heavily to fit this modern setting I’ll give u the notes of what happens -it starts with Yuu finding the dorm (after learning of the whole mistake and the first taste of Crowley not being fit for his job) they are meant to stay in which was for some reason away from the normal dorms which they find A smaller dorm clearly not that kept up with repairs but not enough that Yuu can report Crowley for A crime where they walk into the dorm and get hit on the head by A cat with flames in it ears and tail who had apparently been living here alone for some years and something about leaving wands around the school for precures but Yuu was to stunned to process it all

-once Yuu calms down Crowley pops in to make sure the dorm didn’t collapse with yuu in it then he explains that he have let this cat live here for the past few years with no explanation to it and “asks” you to take care of him for your stay here then promptly and yuu would refuse but being the good/decent/not bad person they are to leave this cat alone they decide to take care of them (for the yuus with cat allergies for some reason Grim doesn’t activate them for some reason)

-the next day when getting ready for school Grim asks to come along and by now Yuu can tell he will just follow you no matter what so you stick him in your bag and head to the school where the whole “who the great seven” explanation from Ace comes in but instead of the god like figures they are instead there the just the 7 founders of the school although one that interests Yuu the most is Miss maleficent who is said to have no known origin homeplace and disappeared one day but then Cue Ace being rude to yuu because somehow yuu not meant to be here spread to the school which got Grim angry and jumped out of the bag and attacked Ace which lead to them damaging the queen of heart’s statue.

-events after this are pretty similar for A while Crowley places you three of window cleaning duty,Ace ditches,multiple chases start too i won’t go into detail but things change when Deuce and Ace break the chandelier now Crowley puts up the ultimatum but instead of A cave it’s A the other side of town which is far but things go back to the normal plot (just you three hitching A ride on Deuces bike) but everything changes once you get near the store.

-when they got into the area the surroundings change around you to strangely A wide open plain filled with all types of plants and A huge flower monster in the distance which quickly attacks when they catch A glance at Grim separating the 3 humans from the cat leaving the monster alone to be able to attack the cat but surprisingly Yuu was able to get in front of Grim just in time to save him but taking A hit that leaves them near death with Deuce and Ace on the bike planning to try to ram into the large creature which leaves them slapped away in the same critical state, Grim stares at the 3 humans in disbelief of what they were doing then A light shines over the whole plain and the Adeuce duo suddenly have magic pens in there hand and Grim puts his paw over Yuu’s hand and like they been doing it for years they say “Precure Transformation!”

“To cultivate the dreams of the kids who watch in Awe” said Yuu

“Give them A way to express there true selves” said Ace

“to teach them how to be adults worthy of being looked up too” said Deuce

“I’m cure Spade”

“I’m cure Ace”

“And I’m cure Royal!”

“We are the dreaming precure!”

-cue normal procure initial confusion and fight scene (i don’t trust myself to write A good fight scene) and at the end of the fight A staff embroiled in golds on A red pole and A mouse shaped tip Yuu said “Precure dream REAWAKENING” making the staff send out A blast of life surrounding the flower making it disappear little by little revealing A nice old lady inside the monster she is laid on the ground gently and Yuu leaves off with “may all your dreams come true”

-after initial confusion the 4 realize they have to go get the lights to replace the chandelier which they quickly do and everything is basically the same again besides the fact the three didn’t mention all the weird stuff that happened but it’s clear that Crowley knew something although what was unknown leaving them to ponder to what was going on and Grim somehow also confused because he never knew THAT was the precure and leaving all of the 4 absolutely confused.

(I'm sorry for this being far from the best this is my first time writing something not just for myself,since this wasn't A full on fic I couldn't expand on much so I would gladly take suggestions and criticism on how to improve this thank you for reading if u did)

[lostacelonnie]

Noelle is just gay as hell for lumine its a fact. You are correct both her hangouts are just them on dates. I always forget people use aether too & then see like. Hangout scenes with him or ayaka's forest scene with him in the inazuma story & go who tf is that oh yeah people pick aether & miss the gay shit. Abyss queen lumine supremacy real i know her jp voice doing abyss lumine is real good. I only know something about faruzan being in a cave for a long time. No context just that. They should give us a fish hangout i want my favorite weirdo to have one. Her & mona have been having real good interactions when they show up together. I read that comic in real time & it was a special kind of hell. I am also a dr fan but talk about it less. Ooooh nice! Ruin serpent isnt the worst honestly but it is slightly annoying. Cryo hypo was my beloathed now its rifthound boss. Had to fight it so much for yun jin & im still not done. Ahh thats entirely fair. I will look forward to your updates! Oh wait do you mean uh. Average avery on here when you mention avery? I dont think i saw a trailerbfor genshin but i did see ganyu & keqing & went alright ill play. & they keep adding hot women so here i am. Rpg style grinding is hard to focus on for me when i could simply not but i do it for my faves. Oh. Also glad to see you are a fellow rangers apprentice enjoyer

HI IM OFFICIALLY BACK FROM THE NORWAY TRIP SO UH. no more waiting 18395092895 years for a response. sorry about that. anyway rigghhhtttt??? its so funny that mhy by making the "canon" traveler male and trying to make his playthrough fanservicey to please That part of the fanbase they also made lumine playthroughs just. lesbian impact. THE AYAKA QUEST IS SUCH A GOOD EXAMPLE OF THIS YEAH. and SO true, gaslight gatekeep girlboss and yeah the jp va's are generally really good. yeah me too tbh??? and that she always calls herself "madam faruzan" and insists shes everyones superior??? no idea what thats about but she seems interesting. YES itd be so fun i can already tell. fish hangout when. SO TRUE i LIVE for the monafischl friendship. the way mona just. accepted that shes gonna get a Lot of weird nicknames. yeahhhh i uh. heard a lot about it. never had the motivation to venture in myself asjdkkgkjjskf. danganronpa rewrote my mind permanently tho. dark times. but i got a lot of friends from that fandom and even keep in touch with some of them. yeah ruin serpent is just kinda annoying, but i have personal beef with cryo hypostasis. the message ab the area round the ch being extremely cold is kind of a meme to me. OUUGH NOT THE RIFTHOUND...... RIP......... hate that one. tho i fortunately didnt have to grind it. and coming back to the trip, it was great! fed some reindeer. ate some reindeer. their meat is SO good btw. saw the northern lights. drove a dog sled. life is good. and yes i do mean average avery!!!!! shes my best friend 4 life. and fairrrrr tho for me it was uh. that one eula ad from a long time ago that got me into genshin? and now i main her so. lmao. i started grinding because of my everlasting love for bianka but now i have no life. rangers apprentice was my LIFE when i was younger omg. pretty sure it was one of my first ever special interests and GOD was it long. still love these books tho i havent read them in a While.

[flyingcookierambles]

Good news!

Last night I finished endwalker on my birthday, it only took playing from midnight to 4 am lol

Bad news I forgot to log into genshin and I didn't get my birthday cake :/

Lmao

Anyways I love zenos k onwards to the endwalker patch msq and dawntrail yay yippeee!!!

Nov 17th edit: some 7.0 screenshots of my WoL, Cyril, with the great glow up graphic update. au ra enjoyers, elezen enjoyers, we WON!!! YIPEEEEEEEE!!!

also a small comparison of no reshade and reshade also. my color saturation is turned up and the bloom is a bit warm, i love the color. he looks so soft. like, sorry, but even with the wonderful 7.0 looks, the base game is so washed out still. like, maybe i'm used to the photo-realistic and saturated landscape of for example, horizon zero dawn, god of war 2018, also more anime/cartoon-y saturated colorful landscapes of genshin, but ffxiv base game is so faded out to me.

also, although im still a bit miffed at myself for taking literally two years and 6 months to finish endwalker, enough time for the latest expac to come out, at the same time, i'm glad i waited for the 7.0 graphics. ultima thule is amazing! the skybox is amazing! also, the elezen glow up helped the scions a lot, urianger and g'raha look so soft and cute. the twins also have cute cheeks that i want to pinch lol. truly the wol's little brother and sister lol. the elf/elezen ears textsures and the light also going thru the skin a bit helped soften them. just. 7.0 was so good lol.

i will say though, idk what it is about my bloom and keepUI settings. like, maybe i just haven't really set up keepUI/mask UI reshade filters very well, but sometimes in night scenes, also ugh most of the ultima thule area except the omnicron area, the brightness of the dialogue box in cutscenes will make the rest of the screen kinda darken to compensate the bloom effect or soemthing. a bit frustrating tbh.

but anyways beautiful 7.0 crystal mother above!!!! i loved her. QAQ......

the bloom and 7.0 eye updates really helped her eyes pop out and glow.

oh, also i kinda wanna steal pint's reshade settings. i think his settings is technically public, but you have to join his discord?

but also, now that i've caught up, i can see some streamer's reactions and VODs to the end of endwalker. since many of them didn't delay like i did, i see the old graphics and i'm like. oh god. OH GOD, THEY LOOKED LIKE THAT????? (weird default shaders, angular elezen, etc., lol) crazy how you can just get used to the new stuff in such a short amount of time, seeing the stuff i was used to for like 2-3 years, it's really like that dang bitch you live like this meme. lol

oh yeah, here's a screenshot from july when dawntrail first released. truly the fate farming craze!!! incredible.

also, me, two of my friends, and one friend's younger sister all partied together to complete the coils of bahamat. we unsynced to carry my friend who is still in ARR/level 50-60 ranges. like literally just zooming thru the combat as 3 lvl 90 players and our baby level 50 friend to get to the dialogue and cutscenes lol.

oh yeah rip huiton. BUT ALSO THE ULTIMA THULE SKYBOX AND STARS OOOOOOOGH THAT IS BEAUTIFUL!!!

also, nastrond. also spineshatter dive. also eye of the dragon buddy system. just. oof. i know i' not a very high level dragoon, i think only mid 70, so i didn't even get to all the fun full rotation level 80-90 stuff, but god dang. bruh moment. sorry for your loss, other dragoon mains and enjoyers.

(note, i am an healer main, astro enjoyer, and i also loved plunge for dark knight. i get it uuuuuu QAQ....)

also! bloom vs no bloom.

OK, NGL, THIS WAS A MARRIAGE PROPOSAL, RIGHT ISHIKAWA???????? YOU LOVE YOUR CATBOY SON OC. YOU MAKE US LOVE YOUR CATBOY SON OC. I GET IT, HE'S THE SPECIALEST BOY EVER. UGHREAUGHEOGAHOUH. I LITERALLY WAS WATCHING THIS PART OF THE CUTSCENE A BIG DOPEY GRIN ON MY FACE, SQUEALING UNCONTROLLABLY. AND LIKE ALL THE STREAMERS I WATCHED VODS OF ALSO WERE JUST LIKE AWWWW. G'RAHA.... :D

oh also some gpose with the kiddos during Forge Ahead companion MSQ walking up the path Raha made for us. also ngl, it was so so funny to me whenever i got "this NPC is now following you" quests lol. like, SE was really like. LOOK! LOOK AT OUR LATEST ESCORT QUEST TECHNOLOGY! lol

so my reaper was lvl 89, not enough for the final lvl 90 msq lol. so, as i always planned anyways, i switched to white mage for the final msq. like, my first class and job were conjurer/white mage, so it only felt appropriate to end with that job.

So, i'll be honest also. i knew some plot points of endwalker. on social media and such, it's kinda inevitable to see spoilers, especially when everyone is literally 2 years ahead of you. however, i did not know the full context or the order in which some snippets and events would happen. also, the only two things i really kept for myself was listening to flow and close in the distance. like, i succeeded in skipping them or tabbing out and stuff whenever i heard the first few notes. so, hearing both for the first time was great. close in the distance playing in the background and slowly revealing itself and more instruments as the msq and scions' sacrifices went on was beautiful. using the instrumental for the dead ends dungeon was good too. i also loved seeing the alien worlds in the dead ends. of course, im sure that it may lose its magic when i have to play it like a thousand times to get my starbird minion.

also ZENOS MY ENEMY, MY FRIEND!!! :D

so also if you got me at 3am in jenova/ EST time, i am so so sorry lmao. i died like 6 times to the stupid planet throwing and somehow got 1 commendation. i'm sure it was a pity commendation lmao. QAQ i've never been so embarrassed in my life i stg!!!

OOPS ONLY 30 IMAGES ALLOWED PER POST LMAO OK, PART 2 INCOMING. THERE'S ONLY A TINY BIT OF MSQ LEFT BUT I KINDA HAD A GPOSE PHOTOSHOOT WITH MY BESTIE/WORSTIE/HUSBAND ZENOS AT THE END OF THE UNIVERSE BEFORE WE BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF EACH OTHER LOL

[beaversatemygrandma]

Oh my god. Work is a shitshow. I’m safe. For now. But wow. I came back from my weekend to the tensed damn environment and I had to do a whole damn puzzle to figure out why.

So. I come in as per usual. Things are normal. I guess the work friend who I’ve had the weird ass crush on is late. Normal.

Peaceful manager is Big Frustrated. That’s weird. I hear him arguing with another manager about the boss’s firing spree. I’m piecing together hints of overhearing with my terrible hearing and how things have been relabeled around the place.

Once an hour is up, I definitely know that person isn’t coming in today. Like. Okay, maybe schedules got shifted due to the new guy.

No.

He has their schedule.

They were fired.

THIS is why the chill manager was mad.

And honestly, I’m mad too. In the nature of what we do, sure they would make occasional mistakes bc what they did was a high risk and high stress part of it. Lives were in their hands at times. I just work the money here. Little mistakes add up a bit, but it was just one huge one that was understandable bc of this “life in their hands” situation. Like when you have to escort somebody who you initially thought was just having a mild panic attack is actually having a minor stroke and your coworker only orders the mistake you made to be fixed over radio (ensuring the boss hears) instead of fixing it and then saying “hey, I did this” instead of announcing it to the whole damn block and getting them in trouble when clearly this was a more than one person job….

I don’t know the whole story. They say he wasn’t being a petty snitch. I say he was being a petty snitch. Either way, with how it was left for a half hour due to the situation, it turned into a fireable offense bc of liability. Which could’ve been avoided. But no.

Either way, I didn’t even get the hint they were fired until I noticed there wasn’t a radio with their name on it anymore. I’d use it when they weren’t there bc yeah, and also bc it was the best working one. Those guys have butter fingers and they tend to fall from the course a lot. Now even though everybody would blame them for things not working, theirs was in the best condition and now the new guy has it. So. Fun.

And the shift in expression as I casually mention them to a manager during conversation. She looked like she dreaded breaking the news to me of what happened yesterday. And fair enough. Yeah. They were visibly the closest person to me there.

Ugh. Either way, I still had a slim hope through the day and ended up calling them when I got home. Only to have them go “oh shit. I forgot to tell you” as it turns out bc they went off and had a good day and got stoned at a skate park and hung out with people they haven’t seen in a while. Like living the best life in the last two days. I was expecting a call to a dark place but no, I got happy, rambly, and stoned. Even news of a cool new job opportunity.

It’s probably super selfish the way I’m thinking right now, but you asshole, the entire environment of that place is going to change now bc there aren’t any other people that fill the hole that you did.

And tbh notably the only person who picked up that I am not neurotypical in any reasonable way and offered me solace in their solitude area they found which is not available to me without them. So fuck.

And no longer have somebody who I can just fuck around with during the day bc I’m bored.

I left the phone call kinda open. Like I offered further contact and spending time together which I fully intend to actually do, so maybe it’s better that we aren’t forced to be together, but can choose it. Maybe I can see true colors better or something and not feel the weird coworker barrier or something. Bc straight up my reaction to the news was like a fucking pet dying. The same feeling in my chest. I got way too attached to this person really fast. I’m at least aware of it. But god. I didn’t want to come back from my weekend for such a shift there.

I honestly wonder if they even actually saw me as a friend or just as a coworker who attached to them in a friendly way or something. Then again, you don’t go through the whole event of getting excited that your coworker wants to break past a fear and offer to be absurdly physically close to them as they do so. Or the various warnings that they do tend to get physically close with friends then proceeding to do so. Like during that tree situation, I felt their dick on my thigh. That’s a bit too close and personal for just coworkers. Given fully accidental obviously but still. Too close for that.

But even with all that shit and more, I still feel as if it doesn’t go both ways. I’ll figure it out over time but still. It feels strange and I don’t want them to leave my life bc of this.

Starting to think that the warnings I started getting at work about them were more of a “don’t get too attached yet” thing and less of a worried about me way. Bc of this.

Agh. Everything is going to feel very wrong at work now. And I’m probably going to occasionally call them when I’m free. If I did it when I think about them, it’d be every goddamn day. Because fuck catching feelings for people. I still can’t even tell if it was platonic and sexual or just flat out feelings. It’s just THERE.

I’ll be fine. But fuck this job and it’s weird high turnover rate for the safety operators. I’m worried about the other one I’ve befriended now too. Like fuck.

Continuation edit now that I've calmed down:

The turnover rate is honestly the biggest concern workwise. Like I haven't heard of a safety operator who has this job for longer than 6 months. (this one was 4, maybe 5) Except one, the manager for that section who has been there for 11 years, practically as soon as it opened. (minus a couple years.) This was the manager who was ultimately pissed earlier today. Which is super out of character for him. It was planned to fire the one incompetent office employee. She was young, it was her first job. She just had too many fuck ups for this place. They need to up their requirements tbh. She wasn't a bad person, just very young and Very Stupid. Somehow, after getting fired, she managed to get placed in the maintenance department of the zoo. Which is honestly great for her. Though, this one was the planned and everybody was like "when WILL SHE GO?" Well. We got an answer and a replacement. We had a small opening in the area of the safety operators. Something part time. Something to where we wouldn't have two days with only two of those guys. (Wednesdays were a goddamn mess.) And here comes a new guy. Fantastic, right? Something part-time and we train him to fill these holes where it's a concerning lack of attention paid to the safety for a couple days? Right? Nope. Full-time hire. Weird. We don't need four a day.

I guess their firing was planned too. They just needed somebody for it. Can't really cut hours for this shift and make it obvious. But then what about those two days?? These guys can't get lunch breaks half the damn time. I've seen them take lunch at like 2:30, a half hour before we start closing entry for the day. And that was if they were lucky. And today, i guess bc somebody (i think i know who) complained about the lack of lunch breaks (probably as a fuck you to the boss for being a bad boss before leaving... and somehow left with a recommendation letter. Idk how they do this shit.) well today we had to take mandatory 45 minute ones instead of 30? Everybody was also being strangely by the book. This is a workplace with a professional mask on it 99% of the time. When the property owner shows up, it's 100%. When that guy is there. Again. MASK. We're immature and fuck with each other. Friendly dragging per se. There was a morning with nothing said other than sexual innuendos bc somebody flubbed what they were saying massively and then we all just rolled with it. If you aren't made fun of at least once a week, it's known that you're hated. Like this morning I asked one of the operators a favor (I'm short. I take advantage of having tall guys around.) and he asked me to submit a work order that would take 5 months to get back. And without waiting for anything further went and did what i asked. And that's just a basic one. That's the petty snitchy guy. His are basically saying no and then doing things. (He's a funky dork who adds some comedic relief to rough days, but i highly highly doubt he can even take the place of the "emotional support coworker" who they fired to make weeks bearable. ugh. mostly due to previous incidents. Again. Snitch.) Anyways, this is generally the test to pass in order to thrive in this environment. You gotta put up with the bullshittery. This new guy has yet to put up with it. He's a quiet and keep his head low kind of person. I've already gone out of the way to show him a few things and he does occasionally greet me already but he talks So Damn Quiet and i'm practically deaf. But, he was hired because he is friends with the snitchy and weird guy. Who is loud. And strange. The new one may actually be a fit. I just wish he were a little louder.

Sidenote: awkward thing with him. The gossipy replacement and ex-worker who came in to cover sometimes and is now replacing the redundant office worker got me going into something about taste in guys and I have said things. This guy is pretty damn hot imo. Long ass hair and a skater punk vibe. Kinda pretty. Woops. He's only 18. At least an adult but ouch. I thought he wouldn't get hired.

Good vibe at least though. Hope that isn't just from my initial impression of him.

I just wonder how long everybody is going to last. I've gotten the feeling that I'm secure. That's at least good, but i really don't like that everybody I could get close to could really get cut at any point.

I'm secure though. I've got this job down.

But then currently my only work friends left are an ex-con that i give rides to and a part time college kid who i only work two days a week with. I'm honestly closer to the con. Because he's open, wants friends, and i have witnessed and hung out with outside of work as well. He's just an old school stoner. Some guy really. Thing is, he's 12 years older than me, buff as shit (intimidating... but holy shit can he crack my fucking back), and would be a bad influence if he weren't a girl dad with a soft spot the same emotional size as his huge ass biceps. He's not bad and the age difference is so much bigger than me and my other coworkers (now with the lack of the one closest, 18-21) but I'm probably about to get a lot closer to him without the one person i generally talk to around. Current worry about next cut is him. This would fuck him over BAD. Because on paper he's a problem. In person, he looks like a wild man who came out of the woods with a prison bod. I really hope not because as far as the safety operators come, he's the only one who looks like he'd be insane enough to do half the shit they do on a zipline and the one that all the customers flock to bc "wild tree man" vibes. This man has named good reviews on the yelp. Yes, he can't keep things on the course for the life of him and leaves vapes around on the counters and drops literally everything and does about damn near everything the one just fired does, but i think due to sheer vibes, he's a bit safer. (Even though he actually isn't even the stronger of the two. It's surprising actually, kinda the superhero now vs past muscle concept.) They have about the same problems, just one has been an adult for far longer and knows how to get away with things. Somewhat well. Somewhat.

Either way. I'm honestly just hoping that work can still be pleasant and that I can actually get through all the days without getting too annoyed by things. Because literally. The one person that makes my week easier just by existing there is no longer there. And further from now, to figure out how exactly I even stand with them because sometimes i feel like basic coworker and sometimes it's as if we've got way more going on. (the fucking tension. Istg.)

Ugh.

[thatfaerieprincess]

the loneliness was a lot easier to handle when I was in a year long dissociative state

[spongebob-connoisseur]

Even though Poseidon didn't get enough dentition from the Third Movie, how would it be like if appeared more in the Show?

Okay unrelated but: when you said dentition I thought you meant literally

I think you meant a typo but for a moment I really thought you meant that about Poseidon and that you wished they studied his teeth. I was like "well that's strange but right on"

Anyways I think you meant recognition/attention? Something like that. Tbh this was something I was thinking about last year.

I assumed they went wirh Poseidon in this movie to avoid contract issues with paramount if they used king Neptune. Like what happened in the first movie where they weren't allowed to reference the 1st movie in the show for 10 years because contract issues. That's why they have a completely different king Neptune in the movie compared to the show.

I assumed something similar might be the case for Poseidon. Make a whole character exclusive to the movie. Anyways we'll ignore that stuff. I had some ideas for him. Neptune is the god of fresh water in roman mythology. Poseidon is the god of sea in Greek mythology. Poseidon should have been the rightful ruler of bikini bottom and other surrounding areas right?

It had me thinking. Maybe there was some dispute amongst the gods. Maybe Neptune and Poseidon are related? Maybe power was given to not by birth right but by capability. It's possible. By birthright, Triton should inherit the throne from Neptune but Neptune pretty much disowned him. The throne instead shall be inherited by Mindy in the future

Tbh neither Neptune nor Poseidon are good leaders. He's also pretty selfish and looks down upon the mortals. But Neptune is faaar more capable compared to Poseidon. Whom ever were the previous rulers of the under sea (their parents) must've saw how vain and hedonistic Poseidon was and decided to skip him and give the 7 seas to Neptune.

Of course to avoid Poseidon from taking his revenge or anything, they bestowed Atlantic city to Poseidon to rule. He can be occupied by ruling his little space while his brother takes on actual responsibilities of ruling the 7 seas.

And from how Poseidon manages his little city. Yeah, just be glad he doesn't have control over the whole ocean.

There's also another idea I have. Maybe there is a different ruler for each one of the 7 seas? Maybe Neptune ones one part, where SB lives. Poseidon owns another part. Would that mean there are 5 more rulers we haven't seen in the show yet? This might explain that Atlantis Squarepantis episode where the Atlantis is ruled by alien-like creatures instead of a god. Did they cause a revolution? Disowned their god? Establish a democratic society? Who knows.

I'm getting off topic. It would be rare to see Poseidon in the main series. If we're going by the events of after the movie, we'd see the true form Poseidon. The one who's aging, bald. That one. He did have a change of heart. I wonder how far you could push that? He abandons his underwater version of sin city to travel and enrich himself of the underwater world. He isn't a good person but he's trying. Very VERY poorly. With animal cruelty/slavery and mass executions in his hands but we won't touch on that. He'd probably still have LOTS of servants come along with him on his travels and pamper him. For some reason I can see him being faux kind. Like he's trying but it's like folks who discover spirituality or whatever and have a whole spiritual enlightening but they're still the same kinda scummy person they were before. Just with an air of pretentiousness added.

I think he'd regularly visit spongebob and the folks of bikini bottom. Trying to soak up thr local culture and try out living the life of a regular plebeian. It's not genuine because he has servants but he treats it like an enlightening experience. I think he'd also try to befriend average fish folk. Trying to be a commoner who understands them even tho he's deeply out of touch. Fish folk treat him well because he's s literal god who's executed hundreds at dinner shows. They don't want to get on his bad side. Tho they're pretty uncomfortable. Which Poseidon just doesn't see. He whole heartedly accepts them as friends💖 and they're like "uhh sure..? Plsdontkillme"

I wonder about his relationship with Neptune? Going off my first theory that they might be brothers. He might want to try to patch up their relationship. idk how they'd tolerate with this dude acting like his third eye was opened.

I don't think he's ever met his nieces and nephews so he'd try to connect with them. He'd try too hard to understand their interests. It's very superficial tho. Yeah that's the best you'd get out of him.

I think he'd really like krabby patties. He'd eat there regularly. Like neptune he just can't resist them and he'd also regularly visit thr krusty krab to see his 1st friend SB. He adores him so. Sponge doesn't mind but I feel like since Poseidon barely has any friends, he'd grow a bit uncomfortably clingy.

That's another thing. Mans never had a friend before. I feel like its only natural that he'd be too close for comfort. Inappropriately timed phone calls. Always wanting to hang out. Gets panics when you're not available and being so worried something happened even tho you just went out to go grocery shopping. Can ramble on and on for hours. He'd probably grow out of it. Or fortunately he'd go on his travels to explore other parts of the ocean so you'd likely get s break from him.

And yeah! Those are some of my ideas. What do ya think?

[cinnamonest]

Suffering major yandere xiao brainrot and this idea has been on my mind for a minute and I wanna share it with you

With all the talk of preggo darlings it got some gears turning

TW/ unhealthy/forced/abusive relationships, implied noncon, pregnancy

Imagine Xiao's darling (who's also half adeptus) has been with him for centuries...but actually, it's a consensual "relationship". At first at least. Like they knew each other since he came into Rex Lapis' care (let's say darling was also with Rex for whatever reason) and grew to be quite close. She was there for him throughout his struggles, from helping him adjust to his life free from the evil god, to him becoming a yaksha, to him dealing with losing the other yaksha, and to his growing Karma, etc. So evidently, he develops a rather strong...attachment towards her.

It then becomes a very codependent relationship--moreso on Xiao's side because he sees her as a means to keep what's left of his sanity. Her presence eases his suffering in a way, so he needs her, by his side, with him at all times with nobody else. He becomes extremely possessive over her-- "who is that person? why are you speaking to them? i don't trust them, you should stay away from them" "do you really need to leave liyue? it's not safe out there with all the demons wandering about, you do not have the strength to defend yourself. it is best that you stay here with me." and so on. Darling is just super naive and doesn't even fight him at first, just listens to him regardless. Eventually he manages to pretty much keep her captive with him at some isolated house in the woods (or even a teapot) and if she tries to leave or even go outside, he's always making up excuses and telling her why she shouldn't, and if she continues to resist him, that's when he gets angry and resorts to using force. It's not like she can fight against him, a yaksha, when she's just a mere weakling halfbreed.

Then one day, his karma begins to start acting up again (and whenever it does, let's just say things get pretty bad for his darling) and as he goes to her to seek comfort, he finds her trying to escape again.

Then he snaps. Ends up fucking his darling up pretty bad (in both ways)

Then she ends up becoming pregnant

And by some miracle, she SOMEHOW manages to escape, and go into hiding. For a good long while, for a least a decade or two. Xiao is literally losing his mind, dealing with karma, slaying demons, and trying to hunt her down; meanwhile Darling finds a comfy little cabin not too far from Liyue, and raises her child on her own.

Years (or decade) later, she and the child go out into the forest for a nice little picnic lunch. The kid manages to wander off deeper into the woods and, uh oh, stumbles into a camp of awaiting hilchurls (however you spell them idk) . BUT THEN--Xiao comes and saves the day, effortlessly destroying the monster and saves the kid (who he didn't yet realize was his)

He turns to the kid (and is sus on how much they resembles him) and is like "hey kid, it's not safe for you out here"

and the kids all "it's okay, my mom is with me!"

Xiao's like, 'what kinda irresponsible parent brings their child to a dangerous area like this one, bring me to them' and the kids like 'kay!' and brings xiao to meet their mother

Meanwhile Darling is panicking over her lost kid, then she hears voices approaching. Her kid comes rushing towards her and as she turns to thank the stranger for helping them BAM! She's standing face to face with Xiao

(I'm sorry this got so long and is incoherent af, I just wanted to get this idea off me chest)

NICE NICE I love this!! Just. Xiao’s face going from shock to disbelief to fury. Poor darling’s face going from shock to terror. And the kid is just “:)???” the whole time.

Tbh it’s hard to say what his exact reaction would be, but my boy is not known for subtlety or self-restraint. He’s not gonna try to put on a good act just bc there’s a kid or anything, the kid’s presence doesn’t really make a difference. Nor is he the type to give up after so long, if anything darling’s absence has just made him more unstable, more needy. 

Honestly the most likely course of action is just snatching her up right then and there -- one good knock to the head and she’s out. The poor kid is confused and thinks he’s hurting her, but he tells the kid it’s ok -- she needed to go to sleep, it’s an adult thing the kid wouldn’t understand. Tells the kid to follow. He has a home to take you both to. You’ll all live there happy together.

[notholaenas]

📺: okay !! after a little break HERE WE GO AGAIN

new counselor lady was sus from the beginning !! i really thought that we were gonna get another psychotic supernatural being this season (that short (long?) lived hellhound) but we get a psycho bitch instead 🥰 how refreashi..... no wait, it's not lmao

somehow this season opener felt a bit off. or maybe it's just another case of stiles not being here, but idk it didn't feel like they're gonna leave yk? i wasn't sold. and it turned out, i was right.

well goddamn i knew they should have just let gerard rot in a nursing home. can this old bitch calm down for longer than a few weeks 🙄

not liam missing his anchor 🥺 not to be that person again but he didn't seem too hung up on hayden leaving and tbh neither is the audience 💀 which further proves my aforementioned points.. but alas

brett and lori not being pack is criminal... they got along so well with the gang™ wasted potential if u ask me :// speaking of brett: he's being hunted down and still finds the time to rock balance his plan is so funny hh

nolan!! gunning for the title of "this season's stinky rat boy" eh? this boy. i think he's also a little fruity (and by fruity i mean has some lingering supernatural abilities, he's just repressed and scared shitless)

scott !! (sigh) no comment. it looks like the whole true alpha thing in him completely falls asleep at the mere sight of danger which SUCKS ASS and good lord this scalia storyline feels so fucking forced ????????? WHAT'S GOING ON

3 episodes in and ngl i'm not enjoying this season as much as i anticipated 😃 but we're gonna power through it!

god these supernaturalphobic human characters piss me so bad lmaooo i just realized if i was a werewolf i'd lose it so quickly ☺️ and ehhh

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS. WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE STILES STILINSKI ANYMORE. WAKE UP PEOPLE !!!

ep5: not that no-lips ex-eichen orderly nutcase 💀 HE GIVES ME THE WILLIES !!!!! get his ass theo

"what did you think we're gonna do? run?" that's. that's cute coming from you scott. it would've been a whole lot more believable if you didn't let an entire pack to be exterminated before you got your act together :) whta the f u c k

the anuk-ite is horrifying ngl things with no faces and no discernable features scare the shit out if me. uncanny valley looking son of a bitch.

thiam is lovely per usual 🥰

anyways this is where i stop for the day. stay tuned as i suffer through the rest of the season tomorrow 🙏🏻

[sidenote: you know what i would've done if i were scott and i knew there's gonna be a hunters problem in the area because there's also a supernatural problem in the area? I'd ask argent for some modified small firearms (non-lethals) and teach my pack to use their fuckin supernatural senses to shoot the hunters in places that won't kill them. fangs and claws are super cool, but they're kinda useless against a semi-automatic or even a crossbow. and it's kinda hard to shoot straight if your fuckin kneecaps are shattered. 🥰 just a thought! A+ for useless true alpha mccall and his elementary school children of a pack] [yeah i'm a little mad because this show just became nonsensical real quick. and i do see the humor in that because it's also a show about werewolves]

📺: i finally gave in and started watching teen wolf !! 2 episodes in sofar and i forgot how creepy derek was in the early episodes 💀 all he did was standing menacingly in the bg like a creep..

[phoenixyfriend]

Re; Ahsoka and Quinlan being the same age, now I'm picturing Ahsoka, Quinlan, and Rex eventually ending up in a weird sorta thruple where Quinlan comes in and out of the relationship but the door is kinda always open for him? And Rex spends a lot of mornings eyeing the tangle of orange and brown skin on the other side of the bed like he has no idea how he ended up here but he's (mostly) okay with that tbh

Context: Commander Buir in chronological order

YES okay so this is wild to me that people are invested in this but like half the time-travel fics with Ahsoka in the same age-group as Quinlan have me wondering if I should ship them. Let me just. Ho shit.

So, okay, I've explored a lot of possible dynamics but there's something really engaging about how Quinlan, trained as a Shadow before the Sith came back, could react to a War Padawan. Ahsoka isn't really infiltration material yet, she's very much a frontline fighter, but she's got a lot more experience with a kind of consistent dark atmosphere that most Jedi don't. They get exposed to plenty of dark stuff, sure, but not the kind of all-encompassing "this is my life for the last two years" thing that is usually reserved for the long-term field agents like Shadows and Watchmen.

The War Padawans, for all that they were supposed to be just normal Jedi Padawans, were living in the kind of consistently negative environment that's normally experienced by those Knighted Sentinels.

So Ahsoka, while still generally pretty young in these AUs, is a very odd kind of person to be around, because she's spunky and vivacious and snippy and affectionate and snarky and knows how to break every bone in your body from harrowing experience as the only thing standing between death and thousands of brothers.

And Quinlan, I imagine, really likes that about her. She gets it, and she's still an energetic and loving and trying to do her best to be a good person despite everything. He gravitates towards her and she... well, she's not blind. She can tell he's interested. And she's not upset about that.

ANYWAY, ONTO REX

So, Rex is... technically twelve. He hasn't exactly got a whole lot of experience with romance. He is also, up until the point of time-travel, legal property of the Senate and the Jedi Order, which means that Ahsoka, or at least her community, owns him. He was indoctrinated to serve her and that community. She also outranks him, for all that she usually lets him take the lead in the field due to experience. He's older than her physically and maturity-wise, but she's also had a grow-up-faster-than-you-should adolescence, and she has superpowers.

What I'm saying is, the power dynamic is fucked up.

(Unironically I spent hours last night realizing that it balances out a lot more than C*dywan does, which I'm censoring because by god do I not want discourse on this post. I like both ships, and don't want to argue about what's the most problematic. It's Star Wars. The only unproblematic ships are Bail/Breha and Owen/Beru.)

Here's the thing, though, because the main thing people seem to argue here is the age/maturity difference as a problem area:

The age difference in actual time is four years, which is smaller than the two main ships of the franchise (Han/Leia and Padme/Anakin, to be clear). The age difference in maturity is ??? We'll say that the clones started aging normally after they hit twenty, so the age difference in maturity is six years... which is still normal for SW ships.

(This is why I don't have any issues with the ship in a post-O66 context, once they've had a few years to move past the traumas and whatnot. The age stuff all evens out with time, they're a good team, and neither was grooming the other. It's not objectively any more problematic than most SW ships at that point, and I'm okay with that. They deserve to be happy if they want.)

But they get yanked away from all that structure of who owns what, who reports where, who has which rank, who's legally a person in the eyes of the Republic when they end up on Dagobah. Once they've registered when they are, the only remaining complications are:

He grew up in a cultlike environment and was indoctrinated to serve her (but has been replacing that indoctrination with genuine respect and affection for her as a person because they've worked together for two years).

She has superpowers (contextually not a big problem: we see several Force-Sensitive/Non-Sensitive ships that don't consider those powers a complicating element)

He's several years younger than her (canonically less of an issue than it could be: Cut got married and has kids) and has next to no experience with what a normal romance looks like except for hanging out on the edges of whatever the fuck his General has going on with the Senator

She's several years less mature than he is (...something of an issue)

So a lot of this is mostly okay. She feels weird about the fact that she's got more knowledge of romance and all that it entails. He feels weird about the fact that, despite her being older, he looks at her and sees someone that's still a little young, not quite a shiny. Except she is older than him, and he's seen her behead four people in a single move, and they've saved each other's lives more times than either of them can count anymore. He respects her, and the fact that she's babyfaced doesn't change the fact that, in terms of who they are as people and warriors, they're on a level playing field.

She still looks at him and mourns his lost childhood, and he still looks at her and takes a moment to see past the too-big eyes and adolescent proportions.

But they really, really care about each other, and maybe part of them is starting to recognize that there's a bit of a crush before they time-travel, but neither one wants to make a move. There's a lot of baggage on both sides, a lot of "but they're a child" and "but they're (literally vs functionally) below me in the chain of command, I can't take advantage of that" and all that fun stuff. It's the kind of situation where two people circle each other for ages without making a move, because actually making that move is terrifying on account of not knowing whether the other party knows they can say no, on top of the usual "what if it ruins our friendship?" thing.

What happens on Dagobah, though... is very tropey. They're sort of stranded until Ahsoka can fix the ship, and that takes time. The area is also very heavy with the Force, dense and heady with the energy it carries, and it's... actually really not great for Ahsoka. She keeps feeling like she's back on Mortis, and has nightmares from the trigger there, but also keeps hallucinating because she wasn't ready for the thickness of the energy (like Yoda) or still new enough to the Force that she couldn't feel how dense it all was (like Luke). She can't work on the engines as constantly as she'd like to get them out of there, and while Rex is a competent mechanic, he's not as skilled with it as the girl who jumped headfirst into lessons with Anakin.

Rex spends a lot of time holding Ahsoka and wiping her brow with a wet cloth while she's feverish and out of it. Yes we're going full Florence Nightingale romance here, let me have my fun.

They get the communications relay working earlier than the engine, find out the year is wrong, panic a bit. All is well. (It's not, but they're holding it together for now.)

Ahsoka keeps working on the engine when she's lucid. Rex keeps hunting up game and edible plants for them while she does. They cuddle at night, because it's not cold but it is empty of the people they care about, and they kind of want that reassurance of someone they trust and love at their back.

(Morai visits.)

(Daughter shows up in the nightmares, tells Ahsoka that age will not come for her beloved until the time is natural for it. The phrasing is dumb but she does manage to convey that the accelerated aging is no longer an issue, if it even was after they hit adulthood. Ahsoka is relieved.)

And, you know, emotions happen. She takes his hand while they're leaning up against each other. He kisses her forehead while she's having a bad spell. They cook together and tell jokes to keep sane and spar. They hug each other through nightmares and panic attacks. There is much blushing. There is much cuddling.

Once, they kiss.

They break apart, flushing and stammering and being very awkward about the whole thing, and make excuses to leave and panic about the fact that they!! Kissed!!!!!

A couple hours later they find each other again, and have a long and complicated discussion about why they like each other (war makes bedfellows, there's trust and affection and all that fun stuff) and why they're hesitant (age stuff, maturity stuff, prior indoctrination), and make the decision to take it slow. They cuddle, and kiss, and blush a lot because both of them are basically just dumb teens having their first real relationship.

They eventually leave the planet, make it to Coruscant, etc. It takes a bit for anyone except Obi-Wan to realize that something's changed between them. Most people didn't know them before, and Anakin's observation skills are currently at a very low ebb. But they sit together and hold hands, and flirt when they spar, and once or twice people find them kissing (both standard and Keldabe) in a corner while holding hands and then just smiling at each other like loons.

They end up rooming together because nobody has the heart to separate them after hearing about all the war stuff. Like yes attachment's bad, but these two do seem to understand loss of loved ones and recognize that they could lose each other at any time and death is natural and they won't lose their entire shit about it, and if even General Kenobi is anxious as hell about being separated from the people he fought side-by-side with for two years, then maybe it's just... really normal for those two to want each other's company, and everyone can just turn a blind eye to the romance happening.

They share a bed, but they only ever sleep in it. Like, there's some goodnight kisses and cuddles, but everything is very G-rated until they've had time to settle into being true equals instead of just the "well, I guess the power dynamics balance out? Maybe?" of before.

And just... yeah. Rex does not believe that he's in this good of a position whenever he has the time to think about it. He's got a girlfriend! A really pretty, smart, strong, skilled one! Who thinks he's a cool dude! How the fuck did a clone like him manage that? He wasn't even legally a person a year ago, how did he end up in bed with one of the most amazing people he's ever met? He spends multiple nights just staring at her while he tries to fall asleep, asking himself how he got here and just like... marveling at her. She's worth marveling at. He's in love and she's amazing and he has no idea how to handle it at all.

...yeah no I have a lot of feelings now.

[bigskydreaming]

You think when Jason first went to Bruce’s him and Dick had an interaction that went like this,

Jason: you don’t know what it like

Dick: Bitch I’m sorry which one of us went to juvie

LOL I get the joke and all but see, I do wanna be clear:

(And this is just in general rather than aimed specifically at you or this ask, anon).

I spend a lot of time talking about being anti-Trauma Olympics and that extends both ways. I don't want Dick perceived as more traumatized or having had it harder than anyone else in his family, just that his own traumas and hardships aren't erased or invalidated in favor of propping up someone else. At most, I'll talk about something like the Forever Evil situation and how he was 'more' the victim there than they were, but that's because that's a specific situational thing where both he and other characters' feelings and hurt in regards to the exact same set of circumstances are being compared, and I'm like, well if you're GONNA do that, you kinda gotta look at who was most directly impacted by events versus had feelings about what HAPPENED to the first person in the first place, just....conveniently leapfrogging over that dude's actual feelings about those exact same things.

But ultimately, although I'll spite-LOL about this sorta joke in response to other fans Doing the Most in the other direction, like.....tbh, I wouldn't be any more in favor of this kinda interaction in fics or canon.

What I WOULD love to see is rather than the kids being pitted against each other in a kinda pseudo competition, see them use traumas and parallel situations as a basis for common ground and building stronger bonds. Like, how much more powerful would it be if what we got instead was Jason finding out about Dick's past experiences with juvie in order to make Dick someone he feels DOES get certain things. I mean, Dick never DID experience various things that Jason did living on the street or earlier living with Catherine and Willis....but like I've always posited that in the early years Dick had a primal fear of fucking up and being sent back to juvie by Bruce, Dick absolutely would be able to understand the fears of a kid who was caught committing an actual crime by Bruce in their first encounter and feared what might happen if Bruce ever decided he wasn't worth giving the benefit of the doubt and ultimately would never be more than a criminal.

Part of what bums me so much about the direction most fics and headcanons take towards Dick and Jason's earlier interactions, is there's a huge chasm in experience, perspective and privilege between Bruce and BOTH his two eldest. That chasm is not nearly as vast between Dick and Jason themselves. Where they diverge in prior experiences tends to have a lot to do with specific situations and circumstances rather than axis of privilege. (Especially when you consider - and god I'm tired of this - how often people default to being like 'well Dick at least had loving parents' when ahem, HOW OFTEN has Jason made clear that he has very affectionate memories of Catherine because she was at times a very loving and attentive mother, and that's WHY her addiction and death hit him so hard, not unlike how the murder of Dick's parents hit him so hard BECAUSE they were loving and nurturing? Like, how often do people throw characters' own stories and canon away JUST to make the case that they have it harder than another one? Can we stop this? Forever preferably?)

But point is, there are tons of areas where Bruce just fundamentally didn't relate to Dick and never was going to be able to, because Bruce was never in a position of being at the mercy of various institutions. Bruce never had to worry about being thrown out by his guardian, Alfred, who technically worked for his family even as he raised Bruce. He never had to deal with peers looking down on him because of who he WAS rather than giving him shit for specific circumstances or events. He never had to worry about his parents or past being demeaned as worthless, he never had to balance trying to retain a sense of self without being subsumed into Bruce AND the Waynes' larger than life shadows, history, and perception in the eyes of the public.

However all of these and more are areas where Dick and Jason absolutely overlap and this could be greatly of benefit to each other, if it was ALLOWED to be. For Dick, Jason's arrival can be an opportunity for him to finally have someone who gets various aspects of growing up with Bruce that will just fly over other peoples' heads as being a problem or them having issues with at all. For Jason, Dick can be an opportunity for him to have an easier time understanding Bruce when these gaps in perception and experience appear, or making himself understood by Bruce, by drawing upon and learning from Dick's own experience trying to navigate those very same gaps between Bruce and himself in years prior.

And even where Dick and Jason's experiences diverge, there's still plenty they could learn from each other that they STILL couldn't have in common with Bruce. Like yeah, Jason - even with a loving relationship with Catherine factored in - didn't ever have the benefit of Dick's history being part of a huge communal family in the circus, and around people who were open and generous with their affection and all that.....and frankly, Bruce never had this either, even factoring in his own relationship with HIS parents. But its something that Dick could definitely impart wisdom in, that would be helpful to Jason in learning to be part of a larger community of superheroes overall, and how to interact with a bigger family that wasn't limited just to himself and his guardian or guardians....as well as helpful after their family grew to include more siblings.

And Jason did have a ton of experiences and perspective born of living on the streets and being entirely self-sufficient from a young age, with wisdom he could share with Dick there, who was MORE likely to get the benefits of that than Bruce even, because Dick did have experience with a closer mindset to what Jason had had at the time, and even if Dick's own experiences running from juvie or in Robin Year One were far more finite than Jason's ever were, there's enough of a foundation there for them to build a common awareness of major events in each other's past and like....thus be able to talk about them, unpack them with each other and not have to worry about being judged by someone who just fundamentally might not get it or understand where they were coming from when they made certain choices based on those mindsets.

And then back again, part of why it bugs to so often hear Dick's years growing up in the mansion talked about as wholly a good thing when there's no separating them from the years he spent as Robin, is because Dick has knowledge and awareness of the streets and crime that's predicated entirely on his years as Robin, that's still broader than Jason's in the sense that Jason's knowledge is limited just to his personal, more contained experiences, whereas Dick as Robin interacted with all sorts of crime and criminals and victims. And who better than Dick to learn from in regards to what its like to even BE a teen vigilante, because for all Bruce's experience as Batman, he debuted as an adult, he'll never be able to relate specifically to the fears and finer points of taking on people who are older, bigger, more experienced than you, when you're that young and small. But again, all of that requires like, ACKNOWLEDGING that Dick went through some SHIT when he was younger, and that doesn't have to TAKE AWAY anything from Jason's own hardships, but it has all the capacity in the world to ADD things to Jason's toolbox for dealing with his hardships.

But yeah, ultimately, like....it annoys me to see Dick's own experiences so often glossed over or romanticized in order to act like he's so oblivious to what someone like Jason's life was like, but more than that, it just bums me because its a waste of so much potential material and just.....erases the opportunity for so many stories that could explore actual new, uncharted territory rather than just retread the same old beats about how oh Dick is just oblivious to what REAL hardship is like but Jason gets it, see.

That's gonna get a yawn from me, lads.

[farfrompleasant]

Girl my dumbass is Back in Utah! What am I doing, AHHHHHHH!!!

It's pretty here and worth a visit but I did hear a honky tonk song when I stopped for lunch (I'm not kidding the words honky tonk was IN the lyrics! 😭)

(and they sold underwear and slippers in the foyer, which is... a choice 😳)

Happy Freyja Friday lol

I love that picture so much! It looks like she's wearing lipstick 🥺 my goodness I can't handle it!

Okay I'd fully have a heart attack if I had Freyja and then couldn't find her when she went to hide! My god this girl puts you through it!!!

I hope she meets your coworkers box turtles too. Are there other animals she can somewhat safely meet? She'd look so adorable with her nonchalant butt just living her best unbothered life 😎

Oh man you're so on top of things! I'd 100% forget that I'd had her out too long and look down to realize she was covered in her stress spots 😭

Now that I see her face in the baby picture I can tell that her jaw does look different after her run in with metabolic bone disease 😢 but I am still of the opinion that she looks super badass! I can see her with a cigar hanging off of the side of her mouth, saying "...you want to know how I got this scar?" 🤣 Like a film noir heroine 😍

Not to worry, Nova is effectively healed! No exaggeration she is doing phenomenally and enjoys car rides and barking at loud motorcycles 😎

Super late but Happy Freyja Friday 🥳🥳🥳

You’re back in Utah?! Really??? Uh… um why? I’d love to know what you’re doing 👀 Utah huh 🤔 is it rural-ish? I’m guessing it is if honky tonk has anything to do with it 😅

Idk why but I thought of that one movie with the gremlins when you said she look like she’s wearing lipstick 💀

This one but Freyja’s adorable ☺️ speaking of adorable when I came home from “celebrating” the fourth, this is what I came home to:

Through fireworks and all, she effortlessly managed to fall sound asleep 💀💀💀 the queen of unbothered fits her so well 💅🏾

She does put me through it but you know what? She’s kinda predictable when it comes to finding her… Freyja loves to nap so she will hide in a shaded area, all of which is reachable so it’s no biggie c:

I’m not really sure about that, but I have considered going to a reptile expo… I could bring her but I’m scared that she’ll get overwhelmed 😅

I try to be, but I honestly put a timer on and seal off door ways or spaces she could possibly waddle into 💀 I forget how small she really is once I remove her pancaking butt from her enclosure 😅 she’s soo tiny! Freyja’s body (not including her tail) is the size of my hand; she’s quite literally a handful 🥰🥺 She really exudes so much spunk for a little one, you know? That’s my Freyby girl 😆

Nova 🥹🥹🥹 she sounds super lively and I think she’ll definitely fit in with a possessed Abbie and a lethargic Lizzie; such good dynamics tbh I hope to hear more about your girls and boys, from the little I’ve gathered from our talky-talks they seem to have so much character 🥰

[fandom-blackhole]

Episode 5 Episode 5 Episode 5 Epi-

Before episode thoughts:

Anyone else missing the like world building intros? I am lol

Like I miss soaking up the new info about the infection

Honestly its not a big deal but I wanted to mention hlthat I miss them lmao

Also 100% not ready for Sam and Henry, im gonna fucking ugly sob bc im emotional and on my period

Anyway episode thoughts ->

Ngl this is how I imagined take overs happening when we saw the aftermath in the game

SIGN LANGUAGE!!!

Honestly I might betray someone for an apple in the Apocalypse...

Tbh kath is giving BIG bad vibes

Perry my beloved (biased)

Why is she the leader? Like it kinda doesn't make sense to me

Sam is so cute istg

Jumpstart lol (I jumped so I dont blame henry)

Henry is the best big brother

Crayons 🥲

And paint!

He is not coming back, rip doc

That hug took me OUT 😭😭😭

Henry gave sam the mask 🥲🥲🥲

Th÷ knife as a mirror 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Use Joel as a distraction, go!

Sammmmm, he's too cute omfg

Ooo are they following Joel and Ellie?

Smart get them to help, sorta like he convinced them in game

That's a weird fucking tone 😭😭😭

Henry you're such a noble at this but I love it

Theyre sharing food

Sam and Ellie bonding

KC federa being absolute nightmare adds up ngl

Just saying henry making a point of being nonviolent is like alot, especially with being a black man, I won't go into detail bc im just a white woman but like ik thats a big deal

All the infected in the tunnels is 👌👌👌

Side point, as someone who lives in KS and is like a ~2 hr drive from KC they did a really good job at making the city look like an over grown KC, bc if im not wrong they didn't shoot this in KC

ISHHHHHH

Omfg im gonna cry

Oh man, i hope the bloated isn't in ish's place, that'd really hurt

The drawing of Ish

The comicccccc!!!

Endure and Survive 🥲

I like that this place kinda fits the toy store as well

Aw the soccer

Henry sold put kath's brother to get drugs for sam... 🥲

Or am I the bad guy? No, honey, no you're not, you did what you had to keep family alive and tbh in the Apocalypse you do what you do

Is she only the leader bc of her brother

I think the kath v henry storyline is very much paralleling tlou p2 storyline

Dude I just have this feeling about perry, I honest to God think he actually cares about the people

Kath is kinda just set on vengeance

I hope the bridge scene, or something like it, still happens

Omfg i HATED this area in game, it sucked ass

Unfair Joel got to the house so much easier lmao

Is Joel gonna have to use the sniper like in the game

Ope. Of course he was with kath

Fuck is that the "run" truck, yup it is

Come on joel!!!

YESSSSS suck it bitches

Keep running omfg

Infected? No, kathleen

Kill kath kill kath kill kath kill kath

Oh fuck this bitch "kids die"

He is worth EVERYTHING

Come on joel do somethingggggg

Oh shit, the boaters coming isn't it!!!!

Use the distraction, fucking gooooo

Fucking shit

There's the infected Joel had to shoot

Thats my smart girl

BIG BOYYYYY

Perry RUN

Ope there's the in game kill animation

Oh thats a kid clicker.....

Ellie you should not have wasted your ammo

This is how sam gets bit isnt it

Joel fucking kill her, nm YESSSS

And just like that, KC is lost :)

Rip my boy perry, I liked you <3

Joel inviting Sam and Henry

I'll tell him in the morning 🥲 will you?

Is he gonna ask about the infected?

Im scared of ending up alone. Oh my baby girl 🥲

Ope there's the infected question

OH FUCK HE SHOWED HER

Oh and she's showing him!!

Oh no no no

Ellie my girl....thats not gonna work 🥲

Oh my fucking God I'm gonna start sobbing

I think she knows its not gonna work and he's gonna change

Oh henry...

Oh henry.....

Oh hes burying them

Joel looking towards the bridge is a good nod to what happened in the games....I wonder if they'll be crossing it and something happens like in the game 🤔

Im sorry. No one talk to me

Im broken istg

Trailer thoughts ->

JACKSON

TOMMY

IS THAT MARIA?! SHES SO PRETTY <3<3<3

Behind the scenes ->

Having them be bonded over being two of the few that speak ASL

The rep of deafness is beautiful

I love the nod to Ish, it was one of my fave parts of the game

These are decisions that love makes, not rationality. Beautiful

The infected were so well done, props to the actors and the coach

The child clicker killing kath was poetic, especially after what she said about kids dying

I think the blood not working on sam is gonna effect what happens with the fireflies later, and why she believes joel

Maybe idk

Anyway, great episode, im a fucking wreck, Henry and Sam you both deserve the world and I hate that it wasn't given to you

Ok ok ok The Last of Us episode 1 thoughts below!

• CLIMATE CHANGE?! (Love that honestly)

• Not me sobbing at the intro (I HOPED they'd do something like the games intro so this was a perfect surprise)

• Joels shirt is inside out 😭 (ok noticed this before it was mentioned)

• Let the man have his coffee Sarah

• Gabriel as tommy?! Sounds almost identical omggg

• The neighbors 😭 (oh I understand now.....)(I like how they changed the changing/infected neighbor scene)

• Desert Storm???? 👀

• Sarah fixing the watch instead of getting him a new one 🥺

• Sarah's backpack is so cute omg

• The dog 🥲

• "Drugs. I sell hard-core drugs." Happy screams

• Joel and his shitty movies smh (hope this is ref later with ellie and joels movie nights)

• Dammit Tommy, jail, really??

• Yo wtf grandma. No joke the cordyceps out of her mouth?!?!?

• The truck scene was done so welllllllllll

• Jimmy's place!!!

• The planes (OMFG THE PLANE)

• Ooo the car crash separating them, I approve

• These bitches CREEPY (Love that they have no fine motor control)

• Joel begging 🥲🥲🥲

• That is infact a small child (😭😭😭)(🥲🥲🥲)

• DONT YOU TWENTY YEARS LATER ME YOU BITCHES (both 2014 Hannah and 2023 Hannah)

Sarah's death was sadder here and I stand by that

• The amount of time it takes to change depending on where your bit poster is 👌👌👌

• Joel doing actual work in the QZ is kinda really funny to me (sewer maintenance) (now this is more like it....wait drug dealing??)

• MUSICCCCCCCC

• HANGING?????? IN THE QZ??? BY FEDRA???

• Tess 🥰🥰🥰

• Ooo truck battery and not guns (what about your guy?- He answers to me FUCK YEAH HE DOES....WAIT oh fuck explosion! Well fuck you anyway Robert)

•  ELLIE!! (SHE HAS HER EYEBROW SCAR! And her sense if humor) (veronica?) (unchain my child please)

• Oooo message operator! (TOMMY!) (Slavers 🤔)

• Joel planning a trip already is genius (wtf you doing drinking and doing pills?!)

• The watch 🥲

• Those walls are THIN or that baby is LOUD

• Marleneeeeeee

• I love all the yellow wires, ik in the game it was an obvious way to show you where to go, but u like that its been added to the show

• Oh damn, rip unnamed firefly Marlene talked too, you're dying in the capital (kim) (ope her ear)

• Tell me to look for the light and ill break your jaw 🥰🥰🥰

• Ellie getting water on her face lmao

• The knife 🥺

• Atleast the wrapped the handcuff so it wouldn't hurt her

• Don't talk about Riley bitch, I will fight you

• I like all the water dripping, good touch

• Joel talking construction 🥰🥰🥰

• Ok but that wallpaper in the hallway with the dead Robert, I want

• Well ellie you tried, but Joel is better

• Ellie is in fact feral, love her

• Give ellie her knife dammit (yes ellie I agree that was an asshole move)

• Ope don't mention Tommy

• What are they capable of?- alot ellie, alot

• You all talk it out but please remember I am bleeding out 😭😭😭

• God I love my husband

• Ellies shoes squishing 🤢

• Bill and Frank 🥺

• Your watch us broken 🥲

• Ok but why is all the wallpaper cute in this episode?!

• Ellie figuring out the radio code shes so smart i love her

• That door (or whatever you wanna call it) was hidden perfectly omg

• Worst time to take a piss (hahahahaha honestly fuck that guy)

• Pedro's eyes 😩 (oh fuck wait hes fucking that guy upppp)

• PTSD!!!

• THE RADIOOOOOOOOO

• THE RADIO AS IT PANS OVER THE CITY AND WE HEAR INFECTED?!? so good

• The trailer!

• The city landscapes 😩😩😩

• Frank!!!!

• There's no halfway with this, we finish what we started *indistinct screeching*

If you read all this PLEASE send me Joel thoughts, I wanna talk about my husband! Also if you want me to explain any of these ASK MEEEE!! Also, Also, I'll be doing this for every episode so if wanna be tagged in these just if be down 👉👈

[feminaexlux]

Fall to Me

TBH I realize belatedly after writing this that Truth was fomenting chaos in my soul and it needed to be taken the fuck out with a proverbial shotgun

Anyway here's a fic that was based off of Truth and without knowledge of the rest of S4 so far, just in case nothing makes sense

I also know I promised smangst (smut + angst) but I got tired/lazy and @mintaka14 posted something I felt was eerily similar (or just reminded me I needed to get this done) so I wanted to get this out the door

Read on AO3 here!

Rated M for language I guess?

⁂

Luka was in a precarious situation. He was lying half-naked on Marinette's chaise, with Marinette herself lying half-naked on him. She let out a quiet sleepy giggle when she brushed her thigh against his raging hard-on, still unfortunately trapped under his over-tight jeans. His neck felt sore where she'd bitten him and he figured there'd be a pretty obvious bruise there soon.

His chest was also similarly marked.

He woke up like this. He had woken up when he had needed to sneeze because some hair got all up in his face. He then realized he had a whole-ass person on top of him. And that person was the girl he had been in love with for years. He had gently brushed away her hair and she had hummed out a "Mmmm, Luuuuka," that got him hot-and-bothered and unable to go back to sleep. He kinda didn't want to wake her in fear of this whole precarious situation blowing up in his face.

⁂

This all started a week ago with Dingo, that fucker. Well, sort of. Maybe. Maybe that was all circumstantial. But Dingo had 2 extra tickets to The Bondsmiths and Ding had given them to Luka. Juleka was busy with stuff, his Ma wasn't into this newfangled noise, Ivan wouldn't go without Mylene, Mylene was in Spain on vacation, Rose was "stuff," and if Dingo was involved most of Luka's other friends wouldn't be.

He'd just thrown it out into a group chat "Hey I have an extra ticket anyone want to come?" and Marinette was the one that said "me~!" Luka and Dingo had a tense stare off when Dingo handed over the tickets.

Her? Dingo's sharp brown eyes seemed to say.

Luka stared back coolly. Yes. We're friends.

Dingo fucking smirked. How much longer, eh? Cheers, mate. He gave the tickets to Luka with a smarmy wink.

The night of the showing Luka got stuck being the designated driver. He was used to it. The concert area was indoors and packed. Ding almost got shitfaced and Brielle had to keep him from falling over. At least the sets were fantastic. When the concert was closing at around 02:34 Ding and Brielle were having sloppy disgusting make-outs, making both Luka and Marinette ever so slightly uncomfortable.

That was when it all started getting weird. Weirder.

Brielle came up for air and told Luka that she and Ding would take a cab back, so all Luka would need to do was drop off Marinette. Luka shrugged and did just that, but Marinette invited him up to crash at her place because it was already so late and he looked so tired. He was about to pass on that when Marinette mentioned that her parents were on vacation in China and wouldn't be back for a whole month, just… out of the blue.

Before he could formulate any sort of coherent response she took his hand and pulled him up the stairs to the living room, sat him on the couch, started brewing some chamomile tea for the both of them, and talked about the concert. Marinette smiled at him after handing him a mug and short-circuited his brain again. "That was fun!"

"I'm glad you enjoyed," Luka smiled back, sipping his tea.

She sat down next to him and brushed her hair back over her ear. A shiny black earring seemed to glimmer with the light it caught. "I'm really glad I was able to go with you."

His head was empty except for noticing the light blush she had on her cheeks. She looked up at him with her big blue eyes, and somehow Luka got the sense that she was… expecting something? Oh, a response, duh. "Same. It's always nice to hang out with you."

She smiled, drank the rest of her tea and set it aside. "Luka, can I kiss you?"

… What? Wow, alright he was tired. He thought he heard her ask him if she could kiss him. He was already in the half-asleep pseudo-dream state and probably imagined that whole thing. Goddamn he was such a simp for her. "Heh," he said noncommittally.

Marinette blinked at him. "Is that a… a no?"

"Hmm?"

She scooted closer to him and he took a big gulp of his tea to hide his nervousness. "You… don't want me to kiss you?"

Oh God he heard that correctly. He sputtered and coughed, covering his mouth with a fist. "Wh-what?" He blushed hard.

She blushed as well. "Sorry! I'm sorry. I-I-I thought… um."

Several years ago they had tried to date but she'd always been… unavailable. So they kept hanging out as friends, which was… fine. It was fine. They'd never even gotten to really do anything together as a couple but as friends? It went better.

He wasn't over her. Never tried to convince himself he was. But he also honestly hadn't expected her to want to get back together. So… what changed? She sighed heavily, her complexion calming back down. "Nothing changed. Not really." She looked down toward the floor at her feet and he finally realized he asked that last thought out loud. "I… maybe I guess I did." She looked back up at him. "I've been thinking lately that I just want… to do something for me, for once. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" She trailed off and stared back at the floor.

"I've never stopped wanting to be with you." Oh shit he said it. She looked back up at him and he awkwardly took another swallow of tea and looked away. "Sounds bad. I guess it is," he said eventually.

"But you didn't tell me?"

He met her eyes. "You were happy. You were with Adrien. I can't force my feelings on you."

She took a breath and let it out slowly. "I was, yeah." Her words hung in the air.

Luka hadn't figured out what happened to break up the state of Adrienette, but when he came back from touring with Jagged, Marinette and Adrien were "just friends" again. Luka wasn't sure how long ago the split happened and after 2 or 3 years apart did he even know Marinette anymore?

She had welcomed him back to Paris as a more grown up Marinette, not actually so different than he had remembered her. She had more confidence, less anxiety, a spine of steel. She was in charge of herself and it was so good to see her so sure.

He didn't want to mess that up for her in any way. So they remained friends for 2 more years. And for one reason or another they both kept being single.

He had somehow reintegrated back in her inner circle of friends. Luka saw for himself that Marinette and Adrien had a lot of history in their little in-jokes and double talk, dropping code phrases and making each other laugh at random. Maybe they'd reignite that spark and Luka didn't want to be caught in the resulting blaze. Even if they didn't, underneath it all he worried about being disappointed and left in the dark by Marinette like he'd been all those years ago.

Not that it did anything to change his attraction to her. He was a sucker for girls like her, except there had only ever been the one.

Marinette took his free hand and squeezed it gently. "I was happy, yes. And… I was hoping I could be again. With you?"

⁂

Slowly, Marinette thought, take it slow. She did spring this on him a little suddenly but hey, it felt right, and she had it on relatively good authority that it was time. At this point in her life she knew to trust her gut instinct and friendly advice. Although she felt more okay with this because her head was sliiightly impaired right now.

She also thought that he'd jump on… her, she supposed, given the opportunity - but he was uncharacteristically reserved. Was it uncharacteristic? Maybe not. He'd always been pretty laid back and easy going.

And observant.

Which meant he was thinking and had doubts about them. Well, shit. Okay. She didn't make it easy on them the last time they tried anything like this. Actually, Hawkmoth had made life difficult for her so there hadn't even been an opportunity for a them.

He sighed softly and squeezed her hand back. "I want… this. I do. But there's still something that worries me."

Alright, fuck going slow. "I'm Ladybug. I am now and I was then. That's why I kept disappearing." This was alright, it was kind of an open secret by this point in her superhero career. Her parents knew, her closest friends knew, and Luka was a close friend she wanted even closer, so he should know.

His mouth was slightly open and his eyebrows shot up. "Ah."

"Things are… okay now, aren't they? I'm not needed like I was before."

He smiled a little and his worried expression softened, understanding. "That… does explain a lot of things but that's not the only thing I was worried about."

That surprised Marinette. And actually now she started to worry herself. What other red flags had she given him? Shit. She'd been a basket case in her earlier teens but she'd left behind the Teenage Angst Things and graduated to Adult Things, hadn't she? Fuck.

He chuckled. "It's not --all-- a you thing, this is a me thing," he said.

"Oh please don't give me the 'It's not you it's me' talk when we haven't started anything," Marinette interrupted.

He snorted, putting down his empty tea mug on the table. "Yeah, I still want to give you some context," he continued. "First off, I'm not like Dad, I don't want to be a big rock star with all that baggage. I just wanna play music and do small gigs and have fun. I'm not gonna be rolling in money and I can't give you everything that you'd possibly want."

Marinette blinked. "I… already knew that?"

"Second, if you do want to 'start' things I promise you I'm not just going to let you go again."

Marinette bit back a smile. "Alright. Are we entering some kind of agreement here? Is this a pre-nup?" She stuck her tongue out at him.

"We're already getting married?" He laughed.

"Not if you don't want to kiss me!" He leaned in and brushed his lips against hers.

Soft, warm, simple. Real.

She placed her hands on his face and brought him in for another kiss, stopping him from pulling back all the way. "More," she breathed out.

⁂

"More?" Luka thought. It was… an odd ask but okay… He was sort of interested in more as well so why not? Except well, there were a few things clarified but he really meant to talk about things in detail before diving into… her mouth like he just did. Her fingers worked their way through his hair, her nails skimming across his scalp sending shivers down his spine. She gave back as much as she was receiving from him in their make-out and if he had to taste only one thing for the remainder of his life he'd want it to be her: sweet, warming, with notes of chamomile, bourbon, vodka, and rum.

This was getting a little too indulgent but most of him didn't mind. One part of him craved this from her, but… wait, shit. Bourbon? Vodka? Rum? She'd been drinking, dumbass. Shit. "Mm--" He tried to say her name to get her attention, maybe slow them down a bit -- okay, a lot -- but she had just leaned back on the couch and he was pulled down with her still relentlessly kissing him. "Mar--" he tried again, but she took that opportunity to take his bottom lip gently between her teeth. One of her hands went to his hips and she grabbed a belt loop and hooked a finger under his jeans, tugging him closer.

Oh boy.

He broke free from her a little reluctantly. "Hold on," he chuckled nervously after pulling back. "Wait a sec."

Her eyes went wide open and she froze. She pulled back her hands and stuttered out a "W-was that bad? S-Sorry! Oh I'm so--"

He pressed two fingers to her lips to stop the torrent of apologies. Apparently the penchant of apologizing for everything wouldn't change about Marinette even if she'd been drinking. "Marinette, you had a few drinks. I don't… I don't think…" He sighed, sitting back up.

"I only had 3?" Marinette squeaked.

"4. You finished off Brielle's."

"I-I think I'm pretty sober?"

"But you're not sure."

"I'm… sober enough, aren't I?"

"I'm not confident making that call."

"But I… I want this," Marinette said quietly but firmly. "I really want this."

The thought that kept mentally slapping Luka across the face was But will you still want this in the morning? Well. He had to be honest with himself. It was really Will you still want me in the morning?

Her knowing the general trajectory of his life and joking about marriage aside, she hadn't said anything about wanting him. Wanting a "this" and wanting to be happy again, sure. Having him along for the ride, sure. But actually wanting him and all he was? Still unclear.

And even if she said she wanted him, would he believe her? She'd been 14, yes, but she said she wanted to date and… never actually followed through, Ladybug duties aside. He sighed to himself. She hadn't been ready. That wasn't her fault. She couldn't tell him then.

But that time of being left behind didn't magically evaporate with an explanation.

He didn't think he was bitter or resentful but all of that was hitting him full-force now. Not again, his head warned him. Not again. You don't have to deal with that. And yeah, he didn't have to deal with that... Sometimes a heartbreak was worth braving.

He needed some time to think about if this was worth braving.

He felt Marinette shuffling at his side but he didn't give in to the temptation to look. He stared down at his hands, his elbows propped on his knees as he slumped forward.

"Can… Can I hear what you're thinking?" Marinette asked softly. There was a little bit of uncertainty in her voice. He didn't say anything for several heartbeats. "Luka?"

Well, at least she didn't call him Adrien. That was a plus. God that'd been once and it still left an awful taste in his mouth. "You should probably head to bed. We can talk later." Later. There was always later. Except he was tired of later. It'd been better when he didn't have to tell himself he could wait. It'd been better when he hadn't had anything to wait for.

Easier. Not better. He had to give her that.

"No," she said. "I'd like to talk now if that's alright. I'd like to… understand." Right, she was better at standing her ground. She wasn't 14 anymore. He wasn't 16 and naïvely hopeful anymore.

He probably wasn't going to sleep anyway. "I don't know how to trust you."

⁂

Shit. Shit shit shit.

Marinette felt the all too familiar cold panic settling on her shoulders like it always did. Of course he didn't trust her, she wouldn't trust herself fully now with how things played out back then. She was definitely getting a headache.

Fucking Cockmoth. Fucking Guardianship. Fucking… Adr--no, she made her peace with Adrien. They were past that now. Fucking… obligations and wrangling all those threads in her life to hold together. Marinette figured she was done with all that, but…

At the epicenter of all of these problems was her. She had to admit, it wasn't her fault but it became her responsibility to treat those around her as fairly as she could. And she hadn't been fair with Luka.

God, she spent hours staring at pictures of Adrien and drooling over every damn appearance. When she tried to get past the crush the whole universe was conspiring to push her to indulge it instead. And worst yet, she did indulge it while trying to date Luka! This was… she should have seen it coming. Who in their right mind wouldn't be at least a little bit wary of her intense obsession over Adrien in her formative years influencing her now? It defined who she was for a long time.

But she was different now, she grew up. She just needed to show it, right?

Wait. There was something about the way he said what he said. "You don't know how to trust me?" He nodded. "Do… do you at all?"

"Mostly." Okay, so there was still a tiny sliver of a chance? "I trust you with almost everything."

"Except?"

"Except me." He paused for a moment. "And you've been drinking."

But! But I… Yeah. "Okay." Her being slightly impaired did make things a little complicated. And maybe that was the reason why she was being a bit impulsive right now, the alcohol was fast-forwarding her decision making process. Marinette let out a breath she held in. "Will you stay here tonight?"

He raised an eyebrow but relented with a "Yeah."

"Come upstairs with me?"

He raised the other eyebrow as well, looking nervous. "Upstairs? To your room?"

"Yes, I wanted to--" It took a second but it clicked. What she asked didn't sound any less impulsive with how he probably interpreted that. "Oh I'm not going to seduce you or anything I just was thinking it'd be nicer for you if you were using my daybed instead of the couch here but I guess it could sound a little like I'm asking for sex which I'm not. I mean unless you consider making-out se--okay nevermind!" Wow, way to go, Marinette. Her face was burning with embarrassment. "I'll bring down a blanket!"

Okay, she had to admit it, she was definitely more than a little tipsy. She felt lightheaded when she stood up quickly. She tried to hide her disorientation as best she could as she walked away, heading toward the ladder leading up to the hatch. She'd been so focused on seeming not-drunk that she bonked her head at the top climbing up. "Ouch!"

"Are you alright?" Luka asked, and even tipsy Marinette could hear the puzzled amusement in his voice.

"I'm fine," Marinette muttered. She forced open the entry and it slammed open on the other side with a loud thunk. Fuck, she wasn't at all convincing him that she was sober. She slipped off her shoes and sat back down on her chaise/daybed, feeling incredibly embarrassed at herself. This was not at all going the way she hoped. He still felt betrayed at the things that happened when she was an idiot teenager. Should she have known? He never told her!

But he never told her because he never thought they'd get back together. That was obvious in the way he said all the things he said.

He did want to be with her. He did want her. But he'd been so hurt by what happened and… she never knew. No, of course she knew, he was akumatized by it. He'd carried that for so long and let her live her life without her knowing. Damn it, she needed to… she needed to make this right.

How could she make this right?

She was unsurprised as she felt the cool streaks of tears falling down her cheeks. In the morning, they'll talk. Ignoring the fact that it was already morning, she knew they both just needed to put this aside and get some rest for now. She heard shuffling and Luka making his way up the ladder. She quickly wiped her eyes.

"Hey, you doing okay?" He had a clear look of concern on his face, kneeling down in front of her. "Is your head hurting?"

"Oh no, sorry, I just spaced out."

"You hit your head that hard?" Luka asked, sounding even more concerned.

"No, no. I-I was… My head's fine, Luka." She sighed. "Just. Thinking, is all. Sorry, let me get the blanket."

He looked up at her a bit more keenly. "You've been crying." A simple statement.

"Yeah," Marinette said quietly, defeatedly. "But I'm okay." She pasted on a smile that didn't reach her eyes. She started getting up but he caught her attention and spoke with some hesitation.

"I don't need the blanket. I'm probably not going to sleep," he said with a half smile, sitting down on the floor in front of her. "Too much going on here," he tapped against his temple. "I'm guessing the same for you?"

"Yeah again," she said, smiling for real this time. "Can we keep talking?"

"We can. I thought it'd be better if you got some rest but sleep isn't coming for either of us anyway." The lights in her room were muted but she could see the bags forming under his eyes. He passed his hands over his chin, lightly scratching at the stubble coming in.

"I was really kind of… no, not kind of. I was awful when we dated before."

"You weren't awful. You just weren't there. I understand that you had Paris to save," he added quickly when she had furrowed her eyebrows. "But the fact remains that I wasn't able to spend any time with you. Juleka kept telling me to watch out and that you dated me only because Adrien wasn't available to date anymore. I was hoping you'd change your mind and you would want to be with me, but then you were making time for him and your other friends while I was left waiting. I'm a human being, Marinette, not a doormat. You forgot about me. It was miserable and I felt like shit. I almost regretted asking you out at all."

⁂

Ah, fuck.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. There were none of his usual filters. He just spewed all that out there. It was all true but maybe he should've let it go? She was young and dumb, anyone at that age was capable of making stupid-ass mistakes. Luka himself made soooo many of them. It'd been like 5 years since their breakup, maybe he should just get over it already. Marinette was in his arms literal minutes ago and he had to go and get like this. And he made her cry again. Nice one, Couffaine.

This was the worst sort of crying. She went absolutely still with a solemn expression, being oppressively silent while the tears fell from her eyes. He felt his mouth go dry and he swallowed. "I--" he cut himself off.

Marinette nodded her head so slightly Luka almost didn't see the motion. "I didn't make time for you," she agreed, her voice tiny and broken.

He suddenly wanted to make a quip about knowing all about time and giving Second Chances to let them both recover but that would be disingenuous and corny as hell. He wasn't so sure he believed in them much anymore. And maybe the way this played out was better anyway, at the very least he needed to own what he said as he couldn't take back his words.

Marinette broke the silence. "I… I wasn't very happy with myself back then. I did make a lot of bad decisions. I didn't give you… much of anything I guess."

He smiled a little. "I still have that pendant."

"I could have given you more. I could have been doing so much more. And I didn't. I didn't," she repeated, a hitch in her voice.

Fuck. He could meet her halfway at least. "It sounded like you had a lot to deal with. You knew your friends better so it makes a lot of sense that you'd prefer to hang out with them. I was just some guy. The brother of a friend. I wasn't that important in the long run."

"Don't say that," Marinette cringed a little. She wrapped her arms around herself. "You were--are important. I was… I was scared. Of a lot of things. A lot of stupid things." She shivered slightly. "I was a little scared of disappointing you. I was scared that maybe I had used you to… make me feel better about myself. I was scared that you'd never see all of me. I was scared that Hawkmoth would use you against me and your family and Paris if you knew I was Ladybug and it happened anyway without you knowing about me. I was so stupid back then."

He sighed. "Hey, please don't beat yourself up. I didn't want to make you feel like you have to explain what happened in the past. I got too… wrapped up in how I felt back then. We didn't work out and that's just life." It hadn't been their time.

Did he still love her? Sure. But they'd been better off as friends. She even made a point of trying to hang out with him nowadays. She told him everything that was on her mind. She gave him small gifts here and there, made it to all of his gigs, invited him to all of her fashion showings. They saw the movies and concerts they wanted to see together. When she felt lost or sad he was the first one she reached out to.

As… friends?

There was this uncomfortable feeling tugging at the back of his mind. He felt it at the base of his skull, a slow dawning realization. But… he almost didn't want to acknowledge it as it could have been just some phantom hope that she would love him like he sometimes dreamed. It was way too easy to get lost in some fantasy.

Maybe he was just scared himself. Scared of being ghosted again if he picked up this hope and tried to make it real. In a roundabout way he was saying that, at least.

Okay. Time to bite the bullet. He leaned forward and put his hand on her elbow. "I know we're hanging out a lot more now. I'm sincerely enjoying all the times we get to do stuff together. I'm grateful that you're giving me all that." This is it. Just say it out loud. "I'm saying that if we want to be more than friends, I'm scared that you're going to leave me again."

Whew. Was that so bad? Actually yeah it was terrifying.

There was a grimace on Marinette's face. "I… I-I understand," she said weakly. "I understand why you'd be afraid of that. But I don't know how to prove to you that I won't?"

It felt like the world shifted, the same as the first time he ever saw her. That earlier hope was coiling around his heart, making it beat faster. "You won't?"

She kept looking pained. "J-Just so you know I t-totally get it if you wanna stay friends or… or something, but I-I want… I know I messed up and I get pretty crazy sometimes so maybe you don't want anything to do with me after this and it's completely your right to do that--"

"Hold on," Luka interrupted her, half anxious and half this is so Marinette. "I'm not--" She put her fingers to his lips to quiet him.

"B-But I have to ask if you could give me a second chance?"

⁂

Marinette pulled her head back a bit and got annoyed at herself. "Sorry, that wasn't supposed to be a pun. O-On your… history as Viperion."

Great, so not only had she made an ass of herself but she just unintentionally punned at Luka. Marinette intensely disliked when Chat had made those inappropriately annoying puns whenever moments were tense. She seemingly picked up the habit, ugh.

Luka laughed and the tension was cut a bit. Maybe Adrien wasn't so wrong to have joked all the time. Luka took her hand into his and pressed his face against her palm. "Alright, alright," he breathed out. Instantly Marinette's heart started beating faster. "I just wanted you to hear me out. You do hear me, right?"

Marinette nodded. "I hear you." There was a slightly rough and tickling sensation under her finger tips as she was able to feel some of his 5-o'clock-shadow (except what was it now, 4am?). Funny, she didn't notice that so much when she'd been kissing him.

"Then you should know that even though I've been scared, I could never stop hoping you'd warm back up to me." He gently folded her hand in his and smiled up at her. "Do you want to go out to dinner with me? We don't have to get married along the way."

"W-Well, yes to dinner, or maybe breakfast? But I mean," Marinette said, attempting for casual but probably still coming across nervous. "Don't throw that whole marriage idea out yet. I'm still not sure how to… prove things?"

He smiled. "Spend some quality time with me. That's all. It doesn't have to be big."

"Okay, breakfast and dinner. And lunch, too." She wanted to spend all the time she could with him. He wasn't asking for much -- to be honest he never asked for much, and this was something she wanted to give.

Luka smiled, probably thinking she was joking. "Think you can get some rest now?" He asked. "I can head back downstairs--"

"No! No, no, I mean, stay here with me. I-If you want."

"You're not trying to seduce me, are you?" He grinned.

"Well, I can," Marinette grinned back. "Can I?"

He seemed a little surprised by that. "Uh," he blushed.

How cute, he got flustered. Capitalizing on that, Marinette leaned forward to wrap her arms around his shoulders, her forehead against his. "I'd really like to," she whispered.

"How... inebriated are you?"

She sighed. "Do you really think I'd be having a coherent conversation with you if I was drunk?"

"You tell me, Ladybug."

"Luka Couffaine, you are a gentleman but I'm merely... warm and not even buzzed anymore. I would definitely still like to seduce you."

He blinked a few times. "Oh." He paused again, thinking it through. He gave a little laugh. "I'd really like that too."