#it just took them a few years to realize it

[celestie0]

gojo satoru x reader | fake marriage au [18+]

in holy matriphony ch10. what if?

ᰔ pairing. fake marriage au - neighbor&realtor!gojo x nurse!reader (ft. choso x reader & suguru x reader)

ᰔ summary. gojo satoru is your extremely annoying next-door-neighbor who you're pretty sure is the most insufferable man you've ever met. given the fact that you exclusively work the night shift at a chaotic emergency department, just got broken up with your boyfriend of 7 years, and have been taking care of your sick mother ever since her multitude of diagnoses, yet somehow your neighbor is the main source of stress in your life should speak volumes. but when your mother's medical bills start to skyrocket to more than you can manage, and you learn that said neighbor of yours has the best private health insurance plan in the country, you ask him to enter a matrimonial agreement with you for the spousal benefits all in the name of saving a few hundred thousand dollars. but you'll have to see if suffering cohabitation with him is worth any amount of money.

ᰔ genre/tags. fluff, smut, angst, enemies to lovers (sort of), annoyances to lovers (that's more like it), small town romance, fake marriage, next door neighbors, lots of bickering, suburban shenanigans, slow burn, mutual pining, gojo likes to play house but you don't, hatred for the american healthcare system, gojo always forgets to mow the lawn, jealousy, an insane amount of profanity, mentions of cigarettes, depression/anxiety; btw slight age gap bc gojo in this fic is 34 n reader is 29

ᰔ warnings. reader in this fic has a sick mother w alzheimer's & cancer so there is secondary medical angst!!

ᰔ chapter. 10/x

ᰔ words. 7.2k

a/n. helloooooooooo my ihm loves!!! tysm for tuning into this new chapter. sorry i am always an hour late to posting them LOL but anywho...as always...hope you enjoy...see ya at the bottom...

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Your eyes flutter open at the early hours of the morning, chest feeling flush from the deep sleep that had just enveloped you, possibly the first time in months you’ve slept through multiple hours without waking up at the top of every hour in cold sweats of stress.

The satin sheets are soft against the skin of your thighs where your nightgown has ridden up, feeling silky and smooth, and when you twist your torso a little, you feel a heaviness in the divot of your waist. Your sleepy eyes glance down to see a strong arm laying over you.

You panic at first, tensing up immediately, before you recognize it as Gojo’s. His hand lays weakly on the sheets in front of you, thumb twitching slightly in his sleep, but even in its lax state, you can still see pulsing veins trailing up the back of it, lining into his bicep into his porcelain skin that’s illuminated by the light just outside the windows. Smooth and pretty, but masculine at the same time, and you just now see that his knuckles are slightly red and there’s a small cut over the third one.

You lay still, unsure of what to do, and as you blink at the wall across from you, your mind wanders back to last night. The feeling of rage in your blood, unsettling in the moonlight, only to be completely dissolved by the feeling of Gojo’s arms pulling you into him, and holding you tight to his chest. So warm and soft, his comforting scent, the nuzzle of his chin above your head… when you close your eyes, you remember the sight of him hovering over you, that conflicted look on his face that was almost delicate with vulnerability, before it disappeared as he fell to your side and suddenly he was holding you in bed and you fell asleep in his arms. The memories have your cheeks feeling hot, and the fabric of your nightgown becomes suffocating.

You turn your head a little to glance over your shoulder, and you see that somewhere along the night, Gojo took his hoodie off, and you realize he’s shirtless behind you. Your heart beats a little faster in your chest, the otherwise shallow cadence of your early morning breathing picking up in speed, rousing you from sleep, and now you were so wide awake you could feel every sensation of his body pressed up against you from behind.

When you squirm a little, he mumbles deeply behind you before his arm curls around your waist even tighter and he pulls you in closer to him. You gasp, feeling him nuzzle his nose into your hair and his thumb presses into your rib cage right beneath your breast.  

“Satoru,” you murmur, shifting more in his strong hold, and when you do, your butt wiggles against the front of him and—

Oh.

Oh.

He’s—

He’s hard.

And you’re almost entirely shocked still from the way it feels against your ass. 

Even through the thick fabric of his sweatpants, he feels heavy and imposing and hot and big—

You wiggle your butt against him a little bit more, curiously, because you can’t help it, and he groans near your ear.

“Mm,” he mumbles, deep and guttural. “Don’t.”

“Why are you hard right now?” you hiss at him.

“Huh.” Is the only noise he makes as he tries to drift off back to sleep.

“I asked you a question.”

He shifts with a sigh. “Morning wood. Testosterone is higher in the AM. You’re a nurse, you should know that.”

“Well make it go away. It’s uncomfy.”

“How?” he asks with amusement in his voice, like he’s hoping you’ll continue to feign innocence because it was the cute thing to do.

“I don’t know. Go tug on it in the bathroom.”

You feel him exhale an amused scoff, then he presses his lips to the nape of your neck lazily, making you gasp, and you feel his mouth stretching into a smile against your warm skin. “You’re funny.”

The intimacy was searing, it spreads a heat across your entire body, and god, his voice… that deep, groggy sound that rumbles in his throat with the slight drawl in his tone…and when he presses a kiss behind your ear, it was over for you.

“Hey,” he says softly, to get your attention, his chin nuzzling the crown of your head, “thank you.”

“For what?” you exhale, somewhat airy, as if trying to prove that you’re not entirely affected by his touch.

He kisses the side of your neck. “For last night.”

Your heart is beating fast, and you blink a few times before you say, “I’m still mad at you.”

He sighs. “I figured as much,” he says and then he drops his head back down onto the pillow in retreat.

Would it be so wrong?

Is the question you ask yourself.

You’ve already pushed his buttons before,

And maybe it wasn’t wise to do so again,

Given the emotionally charged and rather tender moment you two shared last night,

One that has your head swimming with what-ifs that were still left unanswered,

But you find yourself wanting him now more than ever.

A feeling you don’t want to confront in your head,

But one you feel coarse throughout your body.

You let out a shaky breath and push yourself back against his front, feeling his rigid erection press up against the flesh of your ass, and he lets out a choked groan, one that sounds both aroused and mostly confused, before his arm slides down from under your breasts to hold you around your lower torso instead, almost anchoring you to whatever grinding movements you were making against him.

“You keep this up,” he says, “and I can’t make any promises about what happens next.”

You shuffle your thighs, both because you were aroused but also to coyly deflect any responsibility in riling him up, despite the fact that your ass still brushes against his front from the motion. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you quip, innocently. 

“You’re lucky that I play along,” he says, and it felt like a reference to all of the times he just chooses to deal with your sporadic attitudes like it was no big deal even though you’re sure it would frustrate the hell out of any other man. 

His arm suddenly releases hold of your waist, then his palm smooths over the hill of your hip and down the velvet skin of your thigh, the texture of his hand rough compared to the duvet half-laying over you right now. You clench your thighs together, any and all movements of yours coming to a halt from the violent reaction you have to his touch, and there’s a small little voice in your head that’s screaming bad bad bad bad bad bad BAD idea to let him touch you like this but when he kisses down the curve of your neck, it’s entirely drowned out.

“Waiting for you to slap me,” he mumbles, “aaaaaany second now.”

“I’ve sworn off violence,” you gasp when his fingers feather a touch near your inner thigh.

“How convenient.” He pulls you in closer to him as he continues to tease you with his fleeting touch. “Your skin is so soft,” he says, pads of his fingers pressing into the plush of your thigh, his thumb hooking up the hem of your nightgown to gain more access. His nose brushes the hair away at the nape of your neck before he inhales indulgently. “Smells nice too.”

“Satoru.” Maybe it was a warning, or maybe it was just an acknowledgement of the man behind you that’s slowly touching parts of you that were unmapped by him before. Hell, it could’ve even come off as an encouraging moan of his name, for all you knew. You could hardly hear yourself think, let alone what you say.

When his lips press more firmly on the side of your neck, at that sensitive curve of supple skin, you’re unable to hide the reaction your body has to him anymore, a soft moan leaving your lips as you squirm with arousal and a borderline impatience. He pushes his front against your backside in response to the noise, and your eyes shut close to intensify the feeling.

He’s less chatty than usual, and you figure it’s because he’s sleepy and his brain’s not working, and maybe that’s why he’s tolerable to you right now, enough so to where you’re not too pissed off or annoyed at something he has said or done, hence why he has the opportunity to snake his hand up the front of your torso right now without you smacking him across the face for it. At least that’s the excuse you’ll tell yourself.

When his thumb brushes against your nipple, you let out an airy moan and press your entire body back against him with full desire.

“Fuck, you don’t wear anything underneath these?” he all but growls, his hand cupping your breast, gently kneading the softness that he finds and you swear you feel his cock jump in his boxers.

“W-Why would I wear a bra while I’m sleeping and at home?” you breathlessly manage to say.

“Well it’s hard for me to picture you braless underneath gowns that make you look like a 17th century pilgrim.”

Oh. Okay, yeah, there it was. That urge to smack him.

But the thought melts away when his thumb and index finger pinch your nipple, harsh in grip but gentle when he pulls on it, and you’re fully grinding your ass against him at this point, the arousal coiling tightly in your lower tummy, only barely relieved by the tight press of your thighs together.

The large span of his hand squeezes both your tits at the same time, making you moan against the pillow, a sound he reacts to by fully bucking his hips against your rear. “God, knowing that you don’t wear anything underneath these is gonna torture me whenever I see you around the house now,” he acknowledges with a sigh, forehead dropping to rest on your temple as his messy fringe falls against your eyelashes. 

The warmth of his hand leaves your chest as it finds its way smoothing down your midriff, and he briefly digs the heel of his palm into the soft plush of your lower belly, almost as if to experiment, and you completely jump and then writhe in his hold from the ache of pleasure that courses through you. He’s pressing open mouthed wet kisses against your neck now, more liberal with the groans and grunts that he leaves against the wake of your feverish skin as he grinds against you, and the tips of his fingers slip past the band of your panties but—

He can’t get any further than that.

His lips leave your neck and he lifts his head up a little to glance at the state of your thighs, and then he looks down at your face. “Spread your legs.”

You pull a pillow to your face so you can hide your flushed cheeks from him. You’re breathing fast and then sniffle a little against the cover. “Too much,” you muffle into it.

For fucks sake, you weren’t a virgin. You’ve had your fair share of sex in this life at your age, as you’re sure he has too. Yet for some reason the sensations, the touches, the sounds, everything he’s giving you feels so much more intense than anything else you’ve ever had in your life and you’re not sure you can handle it. At least not in any way where you can hide how deeply, deeply, deeply turned on you were right now.

“It’s okay,” he says, voice surprisingly reassuring, but that somehow makes you blush even more, and he gently nips at the lobe of your ear with his teeth while his thumb rubs soothing circles over your lower belly, “it’ll feel good. Promise. And if it’s too much, just elbow me in the ribs.”

“Thaf’s not a proffer (propper) safeword,” you muffle into the pillow.

“Baby. I don’t mean to sound rude, but do you really need a safeword just for me to touch your pussy?”

Oh.

Hearing him so casually call you baby right now did something to you…and there’s no way to even put it into words, just a feeling of visceral arousal that has you instantly melting and sweetly opening your legs for him, and he kisses the hill of your cheekbone before he settles his head back down on the pillow. He gives you his outstretched arm to rest on, your head falling on top of his warm muscled bicep, all your day-two salon blowout hair scattered across the pillow and tickling his skin, and you have to hold your breath when his hand slips right into your panties and his middle and ring fingers glide between your slick folds.

“Fuck,” he shakily exhales behind you, his touches moving with ease from the wetness, smearing it up to your clit where he rubs soft, teasing, agonizingly slow circles that match the lucidity of his sleepy state, “you’re so wet.” 

“N—” you gasp when he draws them faster. “I’m not,” you insist. 

“You’re gonna argue with me right now when I’ve got the proof all over my fingers?” he drawls near your ear, abandoning your clit in favor of slipping two of his thick fingers inside of you so suddenly that your entire body curls up in pleasure, thighs clenching together tightly but his hand is still strong enough to move between their pressure as he slowly pumps his fingers in and out, in and out, in and out of you, curled upwards to that spot inside that has you seeing white. 

You moan with no concern of the sound anymore, freely and whiny into the air, and he ruts his hips against your ass in response to the noise, which only elicits more from you. “Keep ‘em spread,” he tells you, voice strained through his own arousal, knuckles pushing up on your inner thigh to prod you open. 

Ten minutes ago, he’d have never even gotten close to seeing let alone touching the most intimate parts of you. And now, his fingers are knuckle deep inside of you. But it wasn’t enough, you’ve become greedy, and you want more.

“Satoru—” you whine, hand shooting out to grab his wrist, feeling the tilt of it towards your pussy as he continues to casually finger you while you struggle to listen to him—…struggle to keep your thighs open in the face of the desperate arousal that spreads across all your senses. “Mm, faster—”

“Would you kill me if I asked you to beg for it?” he huffs, but you can hear the grin in his voice, like he knew he was pushing it, that insufferably cocky side of him you’d usually despise if you didn’t feel his slick knuckles against your inner thigh every time he pushed his fingers all the way inside.

You turn your face into his outstretched arm, eyes shut close. “Just—” He cuts you off when his thumb finds your swollen clit, the coarse pad of it running over the bundle of nerves as he shallowly continues to fuck you with his fingers, “just do it faster—”

He slows down the pace, thumb entirely abandoning your clit all together, making you gasp, and you hear his voice near your ear when he says, “how about a ‘please’?”

“Oh my god, okay, please, you asshole!” you all but scream, nails digging into his wrist now, dangerously close to his pulse, and you make a mental note to kill him for this later, but you don’t get past the first few words in your head before you hear him say,

“Ehh I’ll take what I can get,” and then the pure pleasure of his fingers relentlessly slamming into you takes over anything else.

He kisses the crown of your head, murmuring words of sweet praise into your hair, words you couldn’t even make out if you tried, because that dull ache of pleasure in your lower belly just builds and builds and builds, even further when you glance down at the sight of him pumping his fingers inside of you over and over. Your head plops down onto the pillow gently when his arm escapes from under, so that he can wrap it around your waist, trying his best to hold you still as you squirm from the pure pleasure, but he abandons the attempt to impatiently yank your gown up instead, your warm breasts becoming exposed to cold air and he squeezes them in his hand roughly before pinching your nipple, making you writhe and arch your back. The grip you had on the wrist of his pounding hand was now seethingly harsh, nails digging deep enough to draw blood, borderline trying to slow him down from just how seriously he took your request for him to go faster, because it was almost too much, but in the most blisteringly arousing way possible.

“Please, Satoru, I’m so close—” you whine, and the second he hears the hint of a plea in your voice, his other hand slips past the fabric of your panties and finds your clit, all four fingers relentlessly rubbing back and forth against the sensitive bud, making you scream, the heel of his palm placing a constant pressure on your lower belly, and when he curls his fingers inside of you, hitting that sweet spot that makes you see stars, you completely come undone, your orgasm washing over you as your walls flutter around his fingers that continue to coax you through every pulsating sensation, moans spilling from your lips, squirming from the pleasure, before you’re completely spent and your body slowly goes limp, relaxed, face halfway shoved into the pillow and teary eyes shut close in ecstasy, hand laying weakly in front of you on top of satin sheets as you try to regain your breath.

You hear Gojo huffing slightly behind you too. He pulls his fingers out of you and you can barely see over your shoulder that he brings them to his mouth. Fuck you need to see it. Need to see the sight of him licking them clean. But all you hear in time is the lewd pop sound when he pulls his fingers out of his mouth.

“Oh my god,” he practically hisses, sucking a sharp breath in through his teeth, and he sounds desperate when he says, “let me eat you out, please—”

“No—” you gasp, a little too quickly and a little too sharp, perching yourself up onto your elbow slightly so you can turn your head to look at him. He’s looking at you with wide blue eyes, completely at halt, like whatever your next wish was would be his command. But he also looks like he wants to stuff his face between your thighs. The duality of man.

You’re still heaving from your orgasm, feeling misty in your chest, eyelashes fluttering with a slight hesitation to say what’s on your tongue because you know it’s only because you’re scared of the intimacy, and yet you want it all at the same time, too.

“Just fuck me,” you say, and to prevent sounding needy, “I have places to be.”

You briefly bite your tongue in regret over the addition, worrying it sounded pretentious and cunty and perhaps too princessy for his taste, but instead he loses his shit. Evident in the broken and desperate groan that leaves his lips, the way he immediately starts fumbling with his sweatpants then his boxers to pull himself out and press the hot tip of his erection against your ass, insanely relished in the fact that you just asked him to fuck you, which should sound like music to his ears at this point based on how strained and hard his boner’s been poking at your ass for the past twenty minutes. And it’s a strange concept, one that has you feeling delirious with confidence as you realize that one of the hottest men you know feels like he’s the lucky one here because he gets to stick his dick inside of you.

You fall back down onto your side in as casual of a way as you could manage, and his strong arm immediately wraps tight around your waist to pull all the softness of you against all the rigidity of him, into that same spooning position that got you into this arousing mess in the first place. You can feel him shifting quickly behind you, mattress dipping with hasty movements as he slides a palm between your thighs then lifts one up to spread you open for him, and then he’s pumping himself in his hand, once, twice, face buried in the crook of your neck as he indulges in a few broken groans, the sound making you point your knee high up towards the ceiling, cheeks flush and almost ashamed by how badly you need him to tear your open right now. There’s no teasing, or tormenting, or taunting from him like there usually is, all of that skipped on the basis of the sheer desperation that coats the shaky breaths he continues to exhale behind you. He lets you bite down on his hand as he yanks your soaked panties to the side and rubs his throbbing length between your slick folds, tip bumping against your clit, his precum smearing over it before he wraps a fist around his cock to position himself at your entrance and then slowly stretches you out, inch by inch, murmuring a deep and sleepy shhh it’s okay near your ear when he hears you whine and whimper from the heavy intrusion, before he’s buried to the hilt inside of you.

“Oh my god,” he sighs, almost at the same time that you do too, and you hear him swallow hard, his cock twitching inside of you. His arm wraps around you tighter, pulling you flush against his front as he presses sweet kisses behind your ear and you two just stay like this for what feels like eternity, his chest expanding in rugged and uneven breaths, like he’s savoring the sensation of being inside of you, before you just can’t take it anymore and wiggle your hips for him to just move already.

“Please, Satoru,” you whine, sniffling a little from the pure arousal, your nails digging into the skin of his forearm, “please—, move.”

He gently nibbles the lobe of your ear, withdrawing his hips back until he’s almost all the way out, save for the tip, before languidly pushing into you again, and your hand reaches out to grab the pillow in front of you to shove your face into to muffle your moan. 

“I must still be dreaming,” he groans, slowly fucking you now with no rhythm or pace, just pure instinct like this is what he was made for, “there’s just—fuck,” he grunts when you clench around him tightly, “there’s just no way you’re letting me do this right now.”

“Mmff,” you muffle into the pillow, pushing your ass against his hips as your form of charity, and he uncrosses one of his arms from your waist so that his hand can snake up to cup your breast in his palm, and all the words you could possibly come up with in your head dissolve into a moan of pleasure instead.

“So tight, god, you feel so good,” he mumbles, his nose nuzzling into your hair as he breathes in deep, and you feel like your cheeks are on fire.

As he continues to knead your breast in his palm, then the other, then squeezes both at the same time, you rock your hips back gently into his, your arm reaching behind yourself, fingertips grazing the short hair of his undercut before you find yourself gripping at the soft tufts above it. You hear him inhale sharply, then he kisses your temple in encouragement as his thrusts pick up in pace and you feel that simmering ache of pleasure in your lower belly grow fiercer. Like he can read your mind, his hand leaves your tits, smoothing down your torso to lay flat against your lower belly, and he sighs in content when he can feel how deep he is underneath his palm over your belly.

You sigh into the pillow, over and over again, as he minds his business in rutting his hips into yours and makes it clear to you that he’s more than enjoying himself from the guttural groans that leave his lips from the pleasure. And when you arch your back further, an invitation that he just can’t refuse, he’s suddenly turning over, making you roll onto your stomach, and he holds himself up on one arm with his chest pressed firmly to your back before he pulls your panties halfway down your thighs and slides a pillow under your tummy, your hips now raised higher for him to slip his cock right into you again, so smooth from how slick you are but you still feel that delicious stretch from the girth of him, and the angle that he gets on you like this, with your ass up in the air, paired by the feeling of his balls slapping against your skin with every thrust that he resumes on you, has you about ready to scream.

“S-Satoru—” you whimper, arms stretching out in front of you as you push your ass back into him, forehead plopping down onto the pillow in front of you, soft hair covering your face as he pounds into you. “Mm—…oh…oh my god.”

“Fuck,” he grunts in between heavy thrusts, hips stuttering briefly from the sound of your moans, “y’know, I always pictured you’d be kinda prissy in bed,” he huffs, leaning over to pull the short sleeve of your flimsy nightgown down your arm to expose bare shoulder so he can kiss you there, “but you’re actually kinda cute.”

“That’s not—ah!” you gasp when he picks up the speed, like he already knows you’re about to argue with him over it, “Satoru!” You yelp, half in frustration, half in pure ecstasy, and you can feel his annoying grin against the curve of your shoulder as he kisses his way up to the side of your neck.

“C’mon baby, just leave it at that, yeah?” he purrs near your ear, his hand coming up to lightly pinch your nipple, “not everything has to be an argument.”

“Mm,” you muffle your irritation into the pillow, high pitched and whiny which he seems to find arousingly amusing given the huff of a laugh he exhales on the nape of your neck and the way you feel his cock jump inside of you, and then he’s nuzzling his nose into your hair again, freely, messily, rubbing his cheek against soft, tousled strands as he sighs with content, and then suddenly, he’s wrapping an arm around your ribcage just under your breasts, and pulling you upright with him so that you’re effectively leaning back against his chest with an arch to your back as he continues to fuck you from behind.

“Seriously, I mean it,” he lowly murmurs near your ear as you tilt your head back onto his shoulder in pure pleasure, and he rubs his cheek affectionately against your hair at the crown of your head while you dig your nails into the skin of his forearm tucked underneath your breasts, “you look so pretty with your hair like this,” he breathes out, almost broken, and it nearly makes you cry when he kisses your cheekbone over the splayed strands of bangs that sit over the curve, “so insanely pretty.”

You were gone, you just didn’t care anymore. With exactly sixteen sweet words, you were done for. You didn’t even realize a man worshiping your hair in the middle of sex was ever something that would have you so down bad on your knees, but you had never felt more deliriously hazy in your life. And you almost want to tell him to just pull on it, then, if he likes it so much, but there’s a simmering feeling at the base of your heart that just wants him to keep being gentle with you instead.

“Satoru, please—” you moan, throat loose and airy, thighs desperately clenching together with need, which only makes you squeeze around him even tighter and the effects of it shows in the way he drops his forehead to your shoulder, his fringe tickling your skin as he breathes heavily.

“God you’re squeezing me so tight you’re gonna cut the circulation off of my dick,” he scoffs, poorly containing just how turned on it makes him feel, and he gently leans over to lay you back down on your stomach so that your cheek is pressed into the pillow and he’s back to fucking you from behind while your ass is up in the air.

“That’s not how that—mm, works, you idiot—“ You struggle to say as heat spreads across your chest, and that tight coil in your tummy pulls more taut with each thrust, to where you feel your vision start to spot, and like he can tell you’re on the edge, his hand snakes down between your thighs and the rough pads of his fingers start to draw circles over your clit, making you gasp so sharply it feels like your throat has gone hoarse.

“C’mon, baby,” he groans, his thrusts picking up in speed along with everything else. He’s panting and heaving, and you feel a droplet of sweat fall from his face onto the back of your neck.

With one more pass of his fingers over your clit, you shut your eyes close, your entire body curls inwards and your orgasm washes over you in pleasureful waves, making you scream out a moan as you squeeze around Gojo’s cock over and over, and you feel his thrusts grow erratic, insane, all loss of tempo and rhythm, his grunts above you sounding so sonically desperate and it’s only when you feel the stutter of his hips, that you barely gain enough sane conscience in the whirlwind of pleasure swimming in your head to remember you have to tell him—

“Wait, Satoru—” you gasp, entirely sober from the delirium, “n-not inside, you can’t.”

“Huh?” he breathes out, in caution, like he had just been on the verge of cumming inside of you, then exhales a breathy—“fuck,” at the implication, and he stays inside of you until the very end of his composure, like he didn’t want to waste a single second of being inside of you, to where you could physically feel his balls jump against your clit with the last thrust he makes right before he pulls out and quickly replaces the squeeze of your cunt with the squeeze of his hand instead, and although you can barely see it over your shoulder, you can just picture it— how hot he looks as he pumps himself over your back with a fucked out groggy expression all over his handsome face. 

“Shit, shit, shit— I’m gonna—” He fumbles with your nightgown to try to pull it up so he doesn’t completely soil it with his cum, but he only succeeds in pulling it up halfway before you feel hot spurts land on the fabric, sporadically painted across the exposed skin of your back, over your ass, your thighs, hell you’re even sure some of it landed in your hair as you hear him groan over and over behind you, a sound so lost in pleasure it has you reeling thinking about how you’re the one that’s causing it, and even after just having had an orgasm, your walls still clench around nothing from the thought.

When he has no more to give, he lets out a shaky breath, one that could constitute as a satisfied sigh, before he flops down onto his back next to you, chest heaving heavily, lips parted with deep breaths, eyes wide as he stares up at the ceiling and shakes his head like he’s in shock before he turns his neck to look at you.

You’re breathing heavily, then shove your face into the pillow, chest laying over your balled up fists you have kept near your rapidly beating heart, and you hear the heaviness in his breathing as well beside you, the sound intensified by the tight shut of your eyes, and you finally feel the horny haze in your head clearing slightly from the early hours of the morning.

The mattress shifts underneath you with Gojo’s weight as you feel him turn onto his side, and he curls an arm around your waist, pulling you in towards him.

And it occurs to you,

It finally occurs to you,

That you two just had sex.

He presses his lips lightly to the top of your head in nothing less than a kiss, before murmuring in a soft voice, “c’mon, let’s go clean you up–”

You slip out from under his arm, from out of the bed, and BOOK it to the bathroom like your life depended on it, shutting the door behind you, and then twisting the lock before you place your palms flat on the surface, huffing and puffing panicked breaths.

It only takes Gojo about five seconds to attempt to open the door, have a moment of brief confusion when he finds that it’s locked, and then knocks. “Wha—…y/n? The fuck? Is everything okay?”

“No! I mean–...yes! I mean–...I don’t know!” you yell.

Even through the wooden barrier of the door, you swear you can see him blink as his face twists with confusion, entirely perplexed by your behavior.

You breathe in deep, and exhale slowly, then rest your forehead on the surface of the door, glancing down at your feet over the cool tile of the bathroom. You shut your eyes close as you still feel the ghostly sensations of his arms handling you in bed, hands roaming across your skin, the feeling of him inside of you–

You shake your head to push the memories away, an almost visceral reaction to them, and it’s mostly silence for what feels like forever but was most likely only a minute, when you hear Gojo say on the other side of the door–

“Just come out here. Let me see you.”

You shake your head, as if he would have any way of seeing your refusal, before you say, “no, I’m–...I’m going to take a shower.”

He doesn’t say anything for a few seconds, and you don’t wait to hear whatever response he does give before you’re turning the hot water on in the shower, to drown out any noise, including the sound of your own pestering thoughts.

You pull your nightgown up over your head, tossing it into a corner of the bathroom along with your panties, open the mosaic glass door to the shower, and walk underneath the overhead shower head, the water trickling down your now tousled, soiled hair, whatever style or curl that it had been smoothed into the day before now falling from the strands, until it’s flatly soaked with water, and you run your hand through your hair, still letting go of soft, remnant huffs of air from your lips to try and come down from the intense feelings that sit in your chest.

What did this mean, now? You two crossed a line that was quite literally never supposed to be crossed. Not according to your rules, or your silly contract, or any notion of this fake marriage. Will this make things awkward? Will this make things feel more real? Will this sort of thing happen again? Would you be able to stop yourself from letting it happen again? 

And will this just further complicate the confusing feelings that you seem to have for Gojo?

What were the possibilities after this, if any?

You’re surprised to find that there’s a small part of you inside, give or take once any of the awkwardness passes, that is for once not afraid to explore the what-ifs.

You step out of the shower, the steam feeling sticky on your skin as you wrap a towel around yourself and then wipe a hand across the foggy mirror to see your reflection. You look fresh, clean, no longer sleepy or dazed, but you blink at the sight of you as you still feel flushed at the chest, and sad that the hair he likes so much is now gone.

How can a person feel so sure and yet so conflicted about one single thing?

Once you finish freshening up, you open the door to get back into the room, but not without peeking your head around to see if Gojo’s still there, only to see that he’s not. And so you apprehensively step out into the room, quickly get dressed, try to dry your hair off the best you can in a hurry, and then—

Your stomach growls.

“Ah,” the soft sound leaves your lips.

You didn’t even do any of the work and you’re hungry?

Your own green sickens you.

You waft across the floors of the loft in your fresh nightgown, then peek your head over the railing of the stairs to see if you hear any noises, but you don’t.

“Mm?” you hum in confusion, then slowly make your way down the stairs.

Having successfully evaded all the creaky wood, you turn the post at the bottom, making your way towards the kitchen but quietly, stealthily, the Pink Panther theme song playing in your head as you tread the wooden floors like a spy.

Your heart was beating fast in your chest, and when you made it to the kitchen, it’s empty. You round the kitchen island, trace the marbled surface with the pad of your index finger.

Where did he go?

And then you realize— it smells like fresh coffee.

You turn around near the pantry, and just at that moment, Gojo comes walking out of it and nearly collides with you in his stride.

“Oh shit—” he says, hand darting out to hold your elbow so you don’t fall backwards onto your butt, and just from that contact alone, you’re searing.

You yank your arm out of his grip and stare at him with a panic. He’s still shirtless, wearing his loosely hung black sweatpants, but his face looks freshened up and his hair is flattened down in an attempt to tame it, and he’s squinting at you like he doesn’t have his contacts in and is struggling to make out what kind of expression you’re offering him.

“Hey,” he says, “can we talk—”

You weren’t ready to talk about it yet. 

Didn’t have enough time to have an existential crisis over it.

And as if God was on your side, the doorbell rings.

“Ah!! Gotta get that!!” you chirp before turning on your heel towards the main entrance, but he reaches out to grab your wrist, making your breath hitch.

“Just hold on one sec—”

“I can’t,” you say, and you both hear the doorbell ring again, “it’s probably the highschoolers I shoo’d off yesterday because I didn’t have any cash to give for their fundraiser. I promised I’d go to the ATM.” You yank out of his hold. “Highschoolers are scary. Don’t wanna make ‘em wait!!! Or they’ll…egg…your house?” You say, blinking at him, the same way he’s blinking at you, because you’re just as confused about what you said as much as he probably is. “Ah…ahahah,” you let out some forced laughter, which most definitely just sounds awkward. You take two steps forward towards the hall, but then turn around to face him again. “Um. Also. If you have any cash on you, that’d be great. I forgot to go to the ATM.”

His expression suggests that he is just so entirely confused by you, and then he watches as you beeline to the door.

You breathe in deep, then exhale slow, tuck some damp strands behind your ear, and just try your best to calm down your beating heart before you yank open the door, fully prepared to see some obnoxious teenagers, when—

You’re met with a wide-eyed, surprised-looking Sylvie standing at the front door instead.

“Ah?” you softly exclaim.

She blinks blankly, her mouth that had been slightly agape at the sight of you closing as if she found it to be too improper of a reaction for her standards, and she smooths down the fabric of the bright blue denim waistcoat she was wearing, her palms gliding down to the matching dress pants, and then tucks her neat hair behind her ear.

“Sylvie?” you blink in surprise, “w-what are you doing here?”

She creases her brow at you, then leans back to check the house number to the side of the doorframe to check if she’s got the right house, and then her gaze shifts back to you. “What are you doing here, y/n?”

“Oh, that’s—” Your voice trails off gently, suddenly unsure, but then you find it again. “That’s what I asked you.”

“What are you doing here?” she asks again, eye contact unwavering, and somewhat impatient.

“Is a ten dollar bill enough? Or do you need a twenty?” You hear Gojo’s voice as he approaches from the side in your periphery while fishing through bills in his wallet, still gloriously shirtless and somewhat disheveled from sex and sleep, and he runs a hand through his hair before he walks right up to you, hands you a couple of bills and says, “ehhh just give ‘em a couple of twenties.”

“Oh, that’s not necessary anymo—” you start, but then his face lifts and he’s glancing towards outside of the door.

It was like something out of a movie, the way you would describe it. The way his face twists from relaxed, somewhat disinterested, into full-blown, unadulterated shock. The way his shoulders stiffen, he’s rendered still, chest decompressing with the exhale he huffs out. You’ve never seen the blue in his eyes so clearly before, not with the way they’ve never been so wide in all the time that you’ve known him, and it breaks your heart—how pretty they are.

“S—” he starts, but the syllable gets caught in his throat.

Your gaze slowly pans from him to Sylvie, who stands just outside the door, and you find that, as her eyes shift between the two of you, her expression is the exact same as his. Wide, shocked, but there was something else in there too. But just the idea of deciphering what it could be, what it could mean, makes you feel so entirely discouraged, like a stranger in your own skin, and it makes your shoulders sulk, same with the sink of your heart towards the center of the Earth.

With eyes flicking back to Gojo, you blink at him once slowly, then twice, feeling like you were out of breath from just standing alone.

You didn’t even need to ask who she was to him. You can tell by the way he’s looking at her.

Sylvie is his ex-wife.

.

.

.

.

.

.

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[end of ch10. 'what if?']

[end of in holy matriphony: season 1]

song of the chapter: 'boyish' by japanese breakfast

a/n. mann i would hate to be gojo rn LOL anywho, thank you sm for readinggg <33 aaaaaaa i'm so nervous to kick off all the DRAMA and angst but............ i'm also very excited 🤭 i am once again shitting bricks posting this chapter bc i just get so nervous posting smut, idk maybe cuz i hardly post it but idk it just is so nervewracking??? and feels so vulnerable??? ahaha i imagine it gets easier the more you post it but like DAMN idk how the jjk smut authors do it. i feel more vulnerable posting this than any other chapter 🤣🤣 buuuuuut i also enjoyed writing it 🤭hehe. apologies for any typos i wrote it w one handKSDJFH im joking i just love this whole two steps forward one step back dynamic btwn reader n gojo like it's the stuff i LIVEEE for in slowburns...i'm so excited to write all the complicated emotions that come w sleeping w a man n then his EX WIFE SHOWS UP AT THE DOOR NOT EVEN AN HOUR AFTER...hell yea huuuuge and i mean BIG and i meannnn COLLOSAL shout out to my lovely beta reader leni, who held my hand as i edited this chapter lol. i had an absolute blast running this one by you 🤣🤣 tysm to all my readers who support this story <3 i was so blown away by the love w ch9, it was a behemoth to edit, and SO challenging to write. i wanted to write a lengthier author's note for that chapter bc i had SO much to say about my writing process for it but i lowkey got lazy LOL but yea it definitely tested my writing abilities the most i think of anything i've put out so far. so i really am so glad it was well received! as you may have seen, this marks the end of ihm season 1!!! sort of a cliffhanger i'm sorryyy i don't usually enjoy leaving chapters on cliffhangers but i just love the open endedness of this scene :'') ihm will be going on a bit of a break after this, both because i actually want to spend a little bit of time hashing out some of the details for the next part of the story, but alsooo so that i can officially take my story 'kickoff' off it's hiatus n release some new work for it :'') i'm so scared to jump back into the world of college soccer player gojo bc i've spent like the past eight months being soooo immersed into fake husband realtor gojo HAHAH but i will say...i miss kickoff gojo sm n i am excited to write for him again...its ok ihm gojo my beloved... i'll be back soon... lol i sound like i'm going fucking mental. anyways. once again thanks so much for all the likes, comments, reblogs, asks etc <3 interacting w you guys is a great part of my joy these days. hope you all have a lovely day/night! ah also!!! ihm playlist!!! finally debuting it!! still a tiny bit of a work in progress but you can find it here: playlist. i name it herbal seedlings bc idk all i could think about was reader’s herb garden - ellie 🧚‍♀️✨

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[lvnleah]

baby miedema’s arrival | our little love.

The phone call came in the middle of the night. You were sound asleep, sprawled out in the middle of Beth and Viv’s bed with Twix tucked into your chest tightly. You were completely oblivious to what was going on around you. 

Beth’s phone rang at around 4am, waking both her and Viv up unexpectedly. She groggily wiped the sleep from her eyes as she sat up and read the name on her phone screen.  

“It’s Sarah.” Beth said, turning to Viv who was now fully awake. 

They both knew what it meant. 

Beth quickly answered the phone, her voice low but steady despite the heaviness of the situation. “Hello?” she said, trying to shake off the drowsiness from her sleep.

Viv sat up beside her, her body tense. She watched Beth closely, knowing from the moment Sarah’s name flashed on the screen that it was urgent.

There was a long pause on the other end before Sarah’s voice came through, soft but firm. “Hi Beth, I’m so sorry for phoning at this time but I thought I’d phone to tell you that you’re now parents again to another little baby girl.”

Beth’s heart skipped a beat, the realization setting in. Her breath caught in her throat as the weight of Sarah’s words sank in. 

Parents again. To a little baby girl. 

She glanced at Viv, whose eyes were wide with a mixture of shock and joy. Neither of them had fully processed the idea of becoming parents again properly, but now it was real.

“Is she okay?” Viv asked, her voice barely above a whisper, her concern overtaking the excitement.

“She’s healthy. Just a bit small, but she’s doing well,” Sarah responded, the warmth in her voice comforting. “If you can, we’d appreciate it if you could get to the hospital as soon as possible.”

“Yeah, yeah, of course. I reckon we can be there in around an hour if that’s okay? We just need to sort something out for Rory.” Viv explained. 

“Yeah, of course, take your time.” Sarah told them, “Congratulations on your baby girl!”

Beth’s heart raced as she quickly pulled herself from the bed. She wanted to ask a thousand questions, but she knew there wasn’t time. They needed to go, now.

Viv had already hung up the phone and was up, grabbing their overnight bag from the corner of the room, “I’ll drive to Leah’s,” she said, her voice calm but firm.

Beth scrambled to grab her own things, still feeling like she was in a bit of a daze. It had been a whirlwind, the idea of adopting again, and now it was happening. The moment had arrived.

They’d had a plan in place for weeks now. With no family living locally, they’d arranged that whilst they were at the hospital with the baby you’d go to Leah’s house. They felt bad dropping you off during the middle of the night while asleep, especially since Leah already had hands full with a newborn, a troublesome 4-year-old and a hormonally infused teenager but Leah insisted that she didn’t care. 

While Viv packed a few things for you into an overnight bag, Beth pulled up Leah’s contact. It only took a couple of rings before Leah answered the phone. 

“Hey, Beth,” Leah mumbled, her voice thick with sleep. “Everything alright?”

“Hey Le, I’m sorry for waking you up but can you have Rory for us?” Beth asked her, “I know it’s four in the morning but the social worker just phoned and baby girl is her and they need us at the hospital and—”

Beth was cut off as Leah let out a soft gasp, “Oh my god the baby’s here? Of course, I’ll have Rory, bring her over and I’ll put her in Buddy’s bed or something.”

“Are you sure?” Beth asked. 

“Course I am, Roo’s no trouble.” Leah said, “I don’t care what time it is, drop her off on the way to the hospital.”

“Thank you, Le. We’ll be there soon.” Beth hung up the phone with Leah and glanced at Viv, her heart still racing. “She said it’s fine, we should get going.”

They moved quietly through the house, careful not to wake you as they grabbed the last of the things they needed. You were still fast asleep, oblivious to the life-changing moment unfolding around you. Twix was tucked tightly in your arms, and your soft breathing filled the room as Beth and Viv exchanged a look.

“She’s gonna be so happy when she wakes up,” Viv whispered. “She got a little sister like she wanted.”

Beth nodded, walking over to you one last time before they left. She gently brushed a strand of hair away from your face, her heart swelling with love for you, her first little girl.

Viv carefully lifted your overnight bag as Beth put a blanket over you before scooping you up. The house was silent except for the soft rustle of clothing and the quiet footsteps.

When they arrived at Leah’s house, the world outside still dark and quiet, Viv parked the car in front of Leah’s doorstep. Beth turned to look at you one last time, her fingers lightly brushing against your cheek. 

“We’ll be back soon, Roo.” she murmured, “With your little sister too.”

Viv opened the car door and gently lifted you out, still wrapped up in your cosy blanket, your little body curled into her chest. She nudged the doorbell softly. Within seconds, Leah appeared, looking just as groggy but eager to help.

“Hey,” Leah whispered, her voice soft in the early morning silence. “I’ll take her, don’t worry about anything.”

Viv carefully passed you to Leah, whispering a quick thanks before kissing your forehead.

“We’ll be back soon, munchkin,” Beth added, placing a gentle kiss on your temple. She didn’t want to leave you, but her heart swelled with the excitement of meeting their new baby girl.

Leah smiled, adjusting you in her arms as she backed into the doorway. “Go, go. I’ve got her. You two go meet your new daughter. Send me a photo of the new Bubba yeah?”

“Yeah, of course,” Beth nodded, “Thank you again, Le.”

The drive to the hospital was quiet. Beth kept stealing glances at Viv, whose knuckles were white against the steering wheel. They were both nervous, every red light made them want to both scream as they tried to get to the hospital. 

“You okay?” Beth finally asked, breaking the silence.

Viv nodded, her lips pressed into a line. “I’m just thinking about what she looks like… and how Roo’s going to react when she sees her.”

Beth smiled at that, her own nerves easing slightly. “She’s going to adore her. She’s going to be over the moon that she’s got a little sister.

Viv chuckled, the tension in her shoulders loosening. “Yeah, I can’t wait to see them together. I can’t believe we’ve got another little girl.”

“I know,” Beth sighed, a smile spread over her face, “Reckon she’ll look like Roo?”

Viv nodded, “I think so, it’ll be nice to see if she looks like Roo from her baby photos.”

As they pulled into the hospital car park, the sun was just beginning to rise. Both of their hearts were pounding as they grabbed their bag and hurried toward the entrance.

The maternity ward was quiet, the hushed tones of nurses and the occasional cry of a newborn echoing softly in the air. A nurse greeted them at the front desk, her smile warm despite the early hour.

“You must be here for the baby,” she said gently. “I’ll take you to Sarah now.”

Beth and Viv nodded, their hands tightly intertwined as they followed the nurse through the corridors. Their hearts felt like they might burst with every step closer to meeting their daughter.

When they reached the room, Sarah was waiting for them just outside the door. She greeted them with a soft smile. 

“She’s right in here,” Sarah said, her voice kind. “She’s a little on the smaller side but she’s doing well. The nurses have been keeping an eye on her since she was born and she’s doing good.”

“What time was she born?” Viv couldn’t help but ask.

“3:35 this morning,” Sarah smiled, “so she’s only…” she quickly checked her watch that read 5:30am, “two hours old. She only weighs 6 pounds, so she’s small, but she’s healthy. Strong set of lungs too.”

Beth and Viv exchanged a quick look, their excitement bubbling over. “Can we see her?” Beth asked, her voice trembling slightly.

“Of course,” Sarah said, stepping aside to let them through.

The room was softly lit, and in the middle of it was a small bassinet. Beth’s breath caught in her throat as she saw the tiny bundle inside. Viv reached out to gently touch Beth’s arm, grounding her as they moved closer.

The baby was impossibly small, her tiny fists curled up near her face. She had a full head of blonde hair, totally different from yours, and the softest little features. Beth’s hand flew to her mouth as tears filled her eyes.

“She’s perfect,” Beth whispered, her voice thick with emotion.

“She’s so tiny,” Viv murmured, her voice barely audible. “Look at her little nose, it’s like Roo’s.”

Beth reached out a hand, brushing her fingers softly over the baby’s cheek. The little girl stirred slightly, her tiny mouth opening in a sleepy yawn before she settled again.

“You guys can hold her, you know.” Sarah smiled, standing a little further back.

“You hold her first,” Viv said to Beth, a smile on her face, “my hands are too shaky.”

“You sure?” Beth asked, getting a nod from Viv. 

Beth hesitated, her hands trembling slightly as she reached down to gently lift the tiny baby from the bassinet. She was so light, feeling like a feather in her arms. Beth cradled her carefully, tears streaming down her face as she stared down at her daughter for the first time.

“Hi, baby girl,” Beth whispered, her voice breaking. “I’m your Mummy.”

The little girl stirred, her tiny fingers curling into a soft fist as Beth held her close. Viv moved closer, her hand resting gently on Beth’s back as she leaned in to look at their new daughter.

“She’s beautiful,” Viv murmured, her own tears threatening to fall. She reached out and let her finger brush against the baby’s hand, and to her amazement, the baby’s tiny fingers wrapped around it. “She’s strong,” Viv added with a soft laugh. “Just like her sister.”

Beth chuckled through her tears, her heart swelling with love. “Roo’s going to be so protective of her.”

“She’ll have to be,” Viv teased gently. “I reckon this little one is going to be feisty.”

The baby let out a soft sound, a little coo that made both Beth and Viv laugh. Beth kissed the baby’s forehead, her heart feeling so full it might burst. She gently turned to Viv.

“Your turn,” she said, carefully transferring the baby into Viv’s arms.

Viv held her daughter close, her larger hands cradling the tiny bundle with such tenderness. She studied every little feature—the soft blonde hair, the delicate nose, the tiny chin.

“Hey, Kleintje,” Viv said softly, “I’m your Mamma.”

The baby shifted in her arms, her little face scrunching up before she let out another soft sound. Viv smiled, her heart melting. “You’re going to be so loved. Your big sister is going to spoil you rotten.”

Beth leaned her head against Viv’s shoulder, watching the two of them together. “She’s perfect, Viv,” Beth whispered.

“She is,” Viv agreed, her voice thick with emotion.

Sarah, who had been quietly standing to the side, finally stepped forward. “We’ve got some paperwork to sort out, but there’s no rush,” she said kindly. “Take all the time you need with her. What’s her name?”

Beth and Viv exchanged a glance at Sarah’s question, their expressions were soft but unsure. They hadn’t settled on a name yet—just two possibilities they weren’t entirely sold on.

“We’d been thinking Freya or Sienna,” Beth admitted, her eyes lingering on the baby in Viv’s arms. “But now…I don’t know. Neither feels right.”

Viv nodded, letting out a soft sigh as she looked down at their daughter. “She doesn’t look like a Freya to me. Or a Sienna.” Her voice was gentle but firm, as though she were already ruling the options out. “They’re nice names, but they don’t fit her.”

Beth frowned, biting her lip. “She would've been Mason if she’d been a boy,” she mused quietly. “But now I feel like we’re back to square one.”

For a moment, the room was quiet, save for the soft coos of the baby. Then Viv’s expression shifted, a small smile tugging at her lips as a thought came to her. “What about Phoebe?” she asked, her voice warm and soft.

Beth’s eyes widened slightly at the suggestion, her heart skipping a beat. “Phoebe,” she repeated, testing the name. 

It had been one of their very first ideas, months ago, but somehow it had fallen to the wayside in favour of other options. Now, looking at their tiny daughter, it suddenly felt perfect. 

“Phoebe,” she said again, this time with more certainty. “That’s it. That’s her name.”

Viv chuckled softly, her finger brushing over the baby’s tiny hand as she spoke. “Phoebe June. After your mum.”

“Yeah,” she whispered, her voice thick with tears. “Little miss Phoebe June.”

The baby shifted in Viv’s arms, her little mouth opening in a sleepy yawn before she settled again, as if agreeing with their choice. Viv smiled, her eyes shining. “It suits her,” she said softly. “She’s a Phoebe.”

Sarah, who had been standing quietly nearby, smiled warmly at their decision. “Phoebe June,” she repeated, jotting it down on some paper. “It’s perfect. A beautiful name for a beautiful baby girl.”

Beth leaned her head against Viv’s shoulder, her gaze fixed on their daughter. “I can’t believe we were thinking of anything else,” she said with a quiet laugh. “She was always meant to be Phoebe.”

Viv nodded, “Welcome to the world, Phoebe June,” she murmured, brushing her finger over Phoebe’s nose. 

The next few hours were spent getting used to life with a newborn. While Sarah sorted out some paperwork, Beth and Viv were shown all of the basics they would need to know about life with a newborn. 

Beth and Viv spent all morning doting on Phoebe, both overwhelmed with love and excitement. They took turns holding her, each marvelling at the tiny life that had just become part of their family.

Beth’s phone buzzed, and she glanced down to see a message from Leah: Roo’s awake. Told her about the baby being here, and she’s already planning what toys to give her. No rush; take your time, we’re all good here x

Beth showed Viv the text, and they both laughed softly. “She’s already head over heels,” Beth said.

Viv laughed, looking down at the baby in her arms, “You better be prepared for your big sis, Phee.”

“Phee?” Beth asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah, Phee,” Viv nodded, “She’s our little Phee.”

Hours later, after the initial paperwork was signed and the nurses confirmed Phoebe was ready to leave with them, Beth and Viv prepared to head home. Beth carefully placed Phoebe in the tiny car seat they’d brought, securing her with a gentleness that only came with experience. Viv hovered nervously, adjusting the blanket and double-checking the straps.

“You’re going to drive like a grandma, aren’t you?” Beth teased, noticing Viv’s serious expression as she buckled herself in.

“Of course,” Viv shot back. “Precious cargo on board.”

The drive home was quiet, save for the soft hum of the engine and occasional coos or whimpers from Phoebe. The normal fifteen-minute drive ended up taking thirty minutes because Viv drove so carefully. 

“Welcome home, Phee!” Beth cooed as she took the car seat out of the car. 

Viv carried the bags inside while Beth gently lifted Phoebe’s car seat out of the car. Together, they stepped into their quiet home, a peaceful contrast to the whirlwind of emotions they’d experienced at the hospital.

The living room was cosy, the soft glow of the afternoon sun filtering through the curtains. Viv set the bag down and carefully unbuckled Phoebe from her car seat, lifting her into her arms. Beth busied herself setting up the bassinet they’d prepared weeks ago, glancing over at Viv, who was swaying gently with Phoebe.

“She’s so tiny,” Viv murmured, her voice filled with awe. “I don’t think I’ve ever held a baby this small.”

Beth smiled, “Roo’s gonna seem massive compared to Phee.” She moved closer and gently ran a finger along Phoebe’s cheek. “It’s so strange, ain’t it?”

The next few hours passed in a blur. Beth and Viv spent the quiet time adjusting to life with Phoebe at home. They soaked in the peacefulness, knowing it wouldn’t last long. Sure enough, as the clock ticked closer to your arrival, the tranquillity gave way to anticipation.

Right on cue, the front door opened, and chaos bursted into the house.

“Is she here? Where’s my sister?!” Your excited voice echoed through the hallway as you bounded into the house, Buddy hot on her heels, giggling just as loudly.

“Girls! Wait—Buddy, Roo!” Leah called after you both, stepping inside, carrying Rugrat inside in her car seat.

Both of you stopped, turning to face Leah with matching grins. “We need to use our indoor voices, yeah?” Leah said gently, crouching down to their level. “The baby is only a little, so we have to be extra careful. And let’s take our shoes off and wash our hands before we say hi, okay?”

You nodded eagerly, bouncing on the balls of your feet. “Okay! But where is she?”

“She’s in the living room,” Viv said, stepping into the hallway with a smile. “But Auntie Le is right, wash your hands first, yeah?”

“Okay, Mamma!” You nodded, running off into the kitchen with Buddy. 

Leah laughed softly, shaking her head. “They’re so excited,” she murmured to Viv and Beth, who both chuckled knowingly.

“You look shattered yourself, Le,” Beth commented, noting Leah’s exhausted face, “Rough night with the baby?”

“Something like that,” Leah chuckled, setting the car seat on the plush carpet in the living room, “This one woke up after you guys dropped Roo off. And then Monkey woke up as well. Thankfully, the only two that remained asleep were Buddy and Roo.”

“Hopefully, it won’t be as bad tonight. You can always call Jordan to come round and help, right?” Viv wondered.

“Thankfully, yeah. They have the game against West Ham tomorrow, so she’s already offered to have Buddy at hers, and Rugrat too if I need a breather. I think I might take her up on that offer so I can spend some quality time with Monkey,” Leah explained, bending down to unbuckle Rugrat out of her car seat and scoop her into her arms, “Ooh, we’re awake, are we? Do you want to meet your new little cousin, as well?”

“They’re going to be best friends, aren’t they?” Beth grinned, peering down at Pheobe, who was still asleep, “Who’d have thought, eh?”

“It still can’t quite wrap my head around it,” Leah murmured, holding Rugrat as she gently sat her up and took her small cardigan of her, “Never in a million years did I ever think something like this could happen. My family are still in shock.”

“That’s to be expected,” Viv responded, “What was your Mum’s reaction?”

“Just… pure shock. Just like everyone else. Jord’s family too,” Leah admitted with a chuckle, “They’ve all been saints though with helping out. J adores her.”

“We washed our hands!” Buddy shouted as she ran through into the living room, as you trailed behind her, “Now can we hold her?”

Once you had scrubbed your hands so thoroughly that even Leah joked you’d polished them, you made your way back into the living room with Buddy trailing behind. Your excitement from earlier had shifted into a quiet, nervous energy as you approached the couch where Beth was now sitting, holding Phoebe.

Buddy climbed up onto the arm of the couch again, peering down at the baby with wide eyes. “She’s so tiny. Just like my sissy!” she whispered. “Mummy, look!”

You hung back near the doorway, your hands twisting the hem of your shirt. You couldn’t look away from Phoebe, but you couldn’t seem to move closer either.

Beth noticed immediately. “Munchkin, you okay?”

You nodded quickly, “She’s… she’s really little,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.

“She is,” Beth agreed, “Do you want to hold her?”

You glanced down at your hands, your feet shifting nervously. “What if she doesn’t like me?”

Beth quickly handed Phoebe to Viv before crossing the room to crouch in front of you. “Oh, she’s going to love you. You’re her big sister.”

“But what if I’m not good at it?” you asked, tears pricking your eyes. 

Viv spoke up from the couch. “Roo, You don’t have to ‘know how.’ You just have to be yourself.”

Leah soon chimed in, “Roo, you’ve been waiting for this day forever. Remember how excited you were?”

You hesitated before nodding, taking a small step forward. Beth held out her hand, and you grasped it tightly as she led you to the couch.

“Come sit here, next to Mamma,” Beth suggested, patting the cushion. “We’ll help you hold her.”

You climbed onto the couch, sitting next to Viv. Your heart was pounding as Beth carefully took Phoebe from Viv and lowered her into your lap, helping you support her tiny head.

“She’s so soft,” you whispered, your nerves melting into awe as you looked down at your baby sister for the first time.

Phoebe’s eyes fluttered open briefly, and you gasped. “She looked at me!”

“She did, didn’t she?” Viv laughed, nodding her head, “I think you’re the first person she’s properly looked at, Roo!”

“What’s her name?” You asked, realising that you forgot to ask after all of the excitement had overtaken your thoughts. 

“Her name is Phoebe.” Viv answered, “Do you think it suits her?”

“Yeah!” you nodded, “Hi Phee-Phee! I’m your big sis!”

Buddy leaned closer from beside you, “Hi, Phoebe!” she whispered loudly, making everyone laugh. “Why she sleeping? When she gon’ wake up? She need to play with us! Her and sissy can play!”

Beth chuckled softly, brushing a hand over Phoebe’s tiny head. “She’s sleeping because she’s so little. Babies need lots of rest to grow big and strong.”

Leah added with a smile, “They're tiny right now. And they won’t be able to play for a while, Bubba. But when they’re older, you two can show her all your games.”

Buddy’s eyes lit up. “I show ‘em my dinos!”

“She’s so small,” you whispered, like you were afraid to speak too loudly. “Will she always be this tiny?”

Viv chuckled. “No, she’ll grow to be big, just like you. But for now, we have to be extra gentle with her, okay?”

You nodded seriously, adjusting your hands slightly as Beth helped support Phoebe’s head. “Okay. I’ll be gentle. I promise.”

Phoebe let out a little yawn, and your eyes went wide as she stirred in your arms. “Did you hear that? She made a sound!”

Beth grinned. “She did. I think she likes being with her big sister already.”

You looked up, a small smile creeping onto your face. “I think I like her, too.”

As you cuddled Phoebe on the sofa, Beth and Viv fell into an easy conversation with Leah, who held Rugrat in her own arms. You and Buddy of course had to tell them about everything you’d done throughout the day while they were away, giving them every little detail. 

Beth raised an eyebrow, “Where’s Monkey?”

Leah let out a soft sigh, her shoulders slumping slightly. “Don’t ask… things are a bit… tough right now,” she said quietly, clearly worried.

Buddy piped up from her spot beside you, crossing her arms and pouting. “Monks’ has done nuffin’ but cry! I think she been silly!”

Leah smiled at Buddy but shook her head gently. “No, Buddy, Monkey’s not bein’ silly. She’s had a baby, remember? That can make her a bit sad right now, but she’s with Auntie Katie who’s looking after her.”

“Oh,” Buddy said, her expression softening as she looked up at Leah. She then nodded as if she understood. “I cheer her up with Lego!” she declared, as if the solution to everything was that simple.

Leah laughed softly, her voice filled with affection. “I’m sure that will help, Bubba. You’re very good at making people feel better.”

Just as Buddy declared her plan to cheer up Monkey, Phoebe’s tiny face scrunched up, and she let out a sudden wail, startling everyone.

You froze as her tiny cries grew stronger,  “Why’s she crying? Did I do something wrong?”

Beth was quick to reassure you, her voice calm. “No, Munchkin, you didn’t do anything wrong. Sometimes babies just cry.”

“But—what if she’s upset because of me?” you asked, your bottom lip wobbling as Phoebe’s cries grew louder.

“She’s not upset with you, Roo.” Viv said, “She’s just trying to tell us something but because she can’t talk like you yet, she cries instead.”

“She don’ like sitting. She wan’ crawl?” 

Leah chuckled softly. “She’s too little to crawl, Bubba. But that’s a good guess.”

Beth crouched down in front of you, her eyes soft. “I think she’s just hungry, munchkin.”

You watched as Beth carefully lifted Phoebe out of your arms. “But… are you sure she’s not crying because of me?”

“I’m absolutely sure,” Beth said, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead. “You were doing a great job holding her. She’s just telling us she needs her milk.”

You watched as Beth cradled Phoebe and began to soothe her, her cries slowly quieting as Viv prepared a bottle for her. “See?” Beth said, smiling at you. “It’s nothing to worry about. She’s calming down now.”

Buddy crossed her arms, nodding like she had it all figured out. “I get grumpy I’ hungry too. Phee like me!”

Leah laughed, pulling Buddy into a playful hug with her other free arm. “You might be onto something there, Bubba.”

“Roaaaaar!” Buddy leaned forward in Rugrat’s face, startling the newborn and causing her to let out an ear-piercing cry, “Mummy! She cryin’ I don’ like dat. Make it stop!” She exclaimed, holding her hands over her ears.

“Oh, Bubba,” Leah exhaled a sigh, instantly trying to soothe the baby in her arms, “Rugrat is only a tiny baby. You can’t do things like that, because it’ll scare her, remember?”

“I only wanted to cheer ‘er up tho, Mummy!” Buddy scrunched her face up in disagreement, “Rugrat’s borin’ an’ don’t do nuffin’! Send ‘er back!”

Leah chuckled, shaking her head, “Silly, Bubba. I can’t send her back. She’s part of our family now, isn’t she? Your little sister. You have to be a good big sister and protect her.”

“I can do dat! I can protect ‘er!” Buddy declared, puffing out her chest, “I be da bestest big sister!”

You stayed quiet for a moment, watching Phoebe calm down as Beth fed her. Then, you looked up at Viv. “She’s not upset with me?”

Viv shook her head with a smile. “Not one bit. She loves you already, Roo. You’re her big sister.”

You nodded. “Okay. When she’s done eating, can I maybe cuddle her again?”

“Of course you can,” Beth said, beaming at you. “She loves being with you.”

The evening soon came quickly. Leah, Buddy and Rugrat left after a little while, Leah quickly helped tidy around the house. After they left, the house fell into a calm stillness. Beth cleaned up the kitchen while Viv settled on the couch with Phoebe cradled gently on her chest. You sat beside them, your eyes growing heavier with each passing minute.

Phoebe had just finished another feed and was now fast asleep, her tiny hand resting against Viv’s shirt. Viv traced gentle circles on her back, her spare arm wrapped around you. 

You shifted closer, tucking yourself into Viv’s side, your head resting against her shoulder. “She’s really small, Mamma,” you mumbled sleepily, your voice muffled.

“She is, isn’t she?” Viv murmured, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of your head.

You scooted closer, leaning fully into Viv’s side. “I love her a lot already.”

“I know you do,” Viv said, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

As the night stretched on, you slowly began to fall asleep. Beth returned from tidying up the kitchen and paused in the doorway, her heart swelling at the sight of you curled up against Viv, Phoebe fast asleep on Viv’s chest.

“She’s completely out,” Beth murmured, a soft smile tugging at her lips as she walked over.

“Both of them are,” Viv whispered, glancing down at you with a tender look.

Beth leaned down to press a kiss to your cheek, then one to Phoebe’s head. “Perfect, isn’t it?”

Viv nodded, her arms tightening just slightly around both of you. “It is.”

[coolchasteboy]

I guess I really never thought about panty slips until it started happening. I bought a few pairs of panties and I was hooked. I don't know why. But once I tried on the first pair, I knew I could never go back to men's bikini briefs or boxer briefs. It was like I was meant to wear panties.

I remember many times when I was still pretending to be a man, but had started wearing panties and they slipped.

Once, I was with a friend. She was driving. I got out and my panty slipped. She asked, "when did you start wear flowery panties?" They were a very cute pair of Jockey elance string bikini panties with flowers on them. I said "I started a few years ago." She asked why. I said because I thought they were cute. She said they were certainly cute on me.

Then one day when I was at Whole Foods, checking out. I had on a really cute side tie string bikini. I was wearing low rise jeans. I didn't think any thing of it. When I went to get money out of my pockets I lifted my t-shirt and the side ties were exposed above my jeans. The check out girl immediately looked at them. I was a bit embarrassed. She asked "you don't wear boxers?" I said no. "Why" she asked. I said "because panties feel better than boxers." She smiled and asked "can your penis fit in them OK?" I was embarrassed and said "yes, because I am not very big." She asked "how big are?" I told her I had never measured myself, but small enough for panties to provide good coverage. She just smiled and continued checking me out.

I vacationed with some friends for about a month. By this time I didn't have any boy underwear left. I only wore panties. I packed about 10 pairs of panties - string bikinis, regular bikinis, boy shorts - in all colors - pink, white, flowers, leopard print. I honestly didn't think about it until after I arrived. "Do you have any clothes for the wash Josh" my friend asked. I told her I could just do my own laundry. She said don't be silly, just throw your clothes in with everyone else's. I had worn my leopard print string bikini panties on the trip. So I put them in the basket with my other clothes. There were two woman, a man, and me. I can only imagine the conversation when my friend was folding the clothes, trying to figure out whose panties these were. I guess the girls figured they were my leopard print panties because they ended up with my folded clean clothes. At the end of the stay after the other woman had gone home, my friend was doing the wash. "Are these your pink panties or Jane's" she asked. I guess without Jane there she didn't know whose they were and if Jane might have left them behind. I was so embarrassed. I said "yes, those are my pink panties." She asked why I was wearing panties instead of boxers. I told her that they fit me better and that I just liked them. She said "OK, that's cool." She even took me panty shopping.

So yeah, I am a panty boi. At the time I didn't realize it was the start of my journey to womanhood. Mina helped me realize my potential. Once Mina found out that I wore panties, she would shop with me for panties and began my feminization process. I LOVE MINA!

[cannellee]

Hi, I was wondering if you could write something for yandere!alpha!sanzu?

I could see a scenario where reader meets him and just assumes he's this pretty, sweet, and quiet alpha but then realizes he's kinda crazy as time goes on. Reader sees his katana, learns he's involved with a gang, and is also pretty sure he's stalking them. But he's just so sweet, picking reader up with his car, helping them clean, and is surprisingly very clingy

TOKYO REVENGERS OMEGAVERSE ★

୨୧ yandere! alpha! sanzu x omega! reader

— sanzu being obsessed with his omega girlfriend

note : making my comeback after what feels like an eternity...(^-^; I'm so so sorry for not posting for sooo long, however! my holidays are around the corner and I'll try to be more active from now on. this year was extremely long and my studies hogged most (all) of my time, but now that this year is over I can focus on other things, one of them being this blog! thank you so much for the love and support it received, even while I was inactive, I'll make sure to thank you properly by posting more often!

note 2 (for anon) : I really hope I didn't stray too much from your original request... it kinda took a dark turn at the end... feel free to send another request if that's not what you had in mind! and sorry for the long wait!!

MY MASTERLIST: ★

your first encounter had been nothing sort of special, quite ordinary actually. however, he quickly stood out from others with his soft speech and calm appearance.

sanzu was supposedly a friend of a friend that your colleague had invited to one of her small party. knowing that, you warmed up to him quite easily. you exchanged a few words, sanzu keeping the conversation alive quite well, his natural eloquence making it hard for you to part ways at the end of the party.

sanzu didn't seem aggressive nor demanding, he kept a very polite stare, even offering his jacket with a sweet smile after your first date when he saw other alphas eyeing your cleavage.

he took care of you very gently, listening to your rambling attentively and complimenting any slight change about you nobody would've noticed. his scent felt reassuring, both manly and gentle, the type of smell that makes you want to burry your nose in his neck.

sanzu was definitely a good alpha in every way possible.

and so you kept the dates going, discovering more of his sweet side. you liked how he never pressured you into doing anything, letting you decide where you'd be hanging out today. sanzu made it clear that what mattered was your happiness, what you wanted to do.

he surprised you with flowers, enjoying how happy you looked.

but, somehow, you could feel him grow more and more protective as the days went by.

it started subtly : a gentle hand on the small of your back when another alpha walked too close, a sudden shift in his tone when you mentioned hanging out with coworkers he hadn’t met. he never said anything harsh, never raised his voice. but something in his gaze felt heavier now, lingering a bit too long, too harsh for you.

you chalked it up to affection. maybe even instincts. you knew alphas could get territorial, and sanzu had made his love for you quite clear, so it had to be just that, right?

but then came the morning you found a small scratch on your apartment door. thin, fresh, and definitely not accidental. you tried to brush it off, but your omega instincts prickled. you knew something was off.

that same day, sanzu showed up unannounced at your workplace. he claimed he was in the area and wanted to bring you lunch. he smiled, kissed your forehead, and you smiled back, even as your stomach slightly twisted.

“you work too hard,” he whispered, brushing a stray hair from your face. “i just want to take care of you.”

if course, you thought it was sweet. maybe a little weird, but that was the sanzu you fell in love with, and your doubts didn't feel legitimate enough for you.

and then you saw the katana.

it wasn't even by accident. it was carefully placed in his car when he came to pick you up one night. you laughed nervously, asking if it was for cosplay or something. but sanzu just smiled, wanting to but failing at reassuring you.

“nah,” he said, voice light. “just a keepsake.”

and that's all you were given as an answer, he didn’t elaborate and left you in such a relentless state you struggled to keep your scent in check.

after that, you started noticing more things, how he always knew where you’d be, how he texted when you were walking home even though you hadn’t told him you were leaving. how, once, you found his scent on one of your clothes even though you hadn’t worn it in days.

you wanted to ask. you really wanted to know. but something about the way he touched your cheek, so soft and gentle, made the questions stay stucked in your throat.

besides… he was still the same sanzu, right?

he still remembered how you liked your tea. he still laughed at your jokes, cleaned your kitchen without being asked, and held you so close you felt safer than anyone could ever imagine.

so what if he got a little possessive ? alphas were like that, right ? it was only natural and not worthy of worrying your mind. besides, you were born a tiny bit anxious and an overthinker, maybe it was time for you to fully rely on him and stop those useless thoughts ?

but the feeling never left you. the feeling that something more sinister was hidden beneath his smile.

                                    · · ୨୧ · ·

so you waited until he was asleep.

his arms had been wrapped tight around you all night, like he was trying to press you into his ribs where no one else could touch you. his scent clung to your sheets, warm and dizzying, almost invasive. you’d spent hours staring at the ceiling, heart beating too loudly to ignore it.

so when his breathing finally evened out, when his grip softened just enough and you knew he was asleep, you slipped out from beneath him.

your phone was already in your hand. you had thought about it for a long time. just one message. something as simple as that.

“hey, i think we need a bit of space. just a little. i need to clear my head.” you wrote, biting the nail of your thumb.

you didn’t send it right away. instead, you just stared at it for a moment, thumb hovering over it. you knew it would hurt him, that was for sure. but wasn't it healthy? for the both of you? you wouldn't be gone for long, just enough time to help you think clearly about everything.

so finally, you hit send. turned off your phone, and exhaled a shaky breath, trying hard for sanzu not to notice the change in your scent and how on edge it has been.

you didn’t hear him move, nor did you hear him wake up, it was complete silence. but suddenly, he was right behind you.

his voice was quiet, but sharp and sent a shiver down your spine.

“space?”

you froze.

“you want space from me?”

when you turned to look at him, his eyes were wide, not angry, not exactly. more like… shocked. like the world had collapsed under his feet and he couldn’t understand why.

“baby, i thought you were happy,” he said, stepping closer, his hand reaching for your face. “you said you were happy.”

“i am,” you whispered. “i just—i need some time. just a day or two. for myself.” you couldn't meet his eyes, hands getting a bit shaky by the second.

his lips parted and he let out a soft, almost sad laugh. “a day or two? alone? no, no, no—y/n, you don’t understand how dangerous that is. there are people out there who’d hurt you. people who’d take you away from me.”

you swallowed thickly and called him weakly, “sanzu…”

“no,” he said, and this time, it was final. “you don’t need space. you need me.”

he stepped even closer. his scent flooding your senses. it was heavy, cloying, you couldn’t escape it and your knees weakened beneath it. maybe he did it on purpose. maybe he always had...

then his hands cupped your face, gentle but firm.

“i’ve taken care of you,” he whispered, brushing his thumb over your cheek. “i did everything for you, made sure you never missed anything. i gave you everything even when you didn’t ask me to, did you notice that? i watched you sleep last night, you looked so peaceful...”

and that's when your blood turned cold, and without even knowing, your pheromones turned sour too, circling around him almost like a punishment. a painful reminder of what his obsession turned your relationship into.

“don’t push me away,” he said, almost pleadingly now, shaking slightly.

he kissed your forehead like he always did, it was slow, deliberate, like he was trying to shut your thoughts for good.

however, no matter what, his hands never gripped too tightly. his tone never rose. but everything about him was final, like he was choosing the words that would end the conversation for good.

“you don’t need to overthink things, sweetheart,” sanzu said gently, brushing your hair behind your ear. “i know the world gets rough sometimes. but when that happens, you come to me. okay?”

you didn't answer immediately. instead, you closed your eyes, breathed in his heavy scent, powerful enough to cloud your mind for a moment.

you heard him soothe you, voice soft, trying hard to appear less threatening. you knew he did it on purpose, to confuse you. he was kind and he was worried, it was nothing more. but as usual, you were too stubborn to realise.

sanzu would never be mean to you. he'd simply help you understand that he wants the best for you.

“hey,” he whispered, tilting your chin up so your eyes met his. his expression was soft, painfully soft, like you were a wounded animal and he was the one nursing you back to health. “i’m not mad. i’d never be mad at you. you’re just… scared. that’s all.”

he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you in close. you could feel the hum of his chest, the way his scent deepened, it was comforting, safe and overwhelming in a way that made it hard to think. your instincts soothed under it even as your mind screamed.

“you’re tired,” he said, swaying the both of you slightly like you were a baby in need of comfort. “you always get this way when you’re tired. i’ll run you a bath, yeah? something warm."

his voice was thick with love, and pride. as if he had done something worthy of your praise.

and he had, hadn’t he? he took care of you. remembered things you forgot. loved you in ways no one else ever had...

he loosened his hold only to gently guide you toward the bathroom.

“just let me handle things,” he added softly, brushing his thumb over your lower lip. “you don’t have to think. you don’t have to decide. i’ll always know what’s best for you.”

and just like that, the conversation was over.

[hedwig221b]

Hello

I hope you're having an amazing day/evening

Thank you for all your hard work, just finished rereading Incandescent ❤️

Do you know of any fics where Sterek are mates, established or newly discovered, and they have to be apart for a while and the separation causes anxiety, unease or physical pain until they're together again?

I hope that makes sense. Have a lovely day, thank you

You're welcome! As I was finishing this rec list, I remembered that several of my other fics fit this separation trope, bc I'm such a sucker for it, so I added a few in the end 💕

yours was a good heart for me by stilinskisparkles

Stiles was right about the end of the world, and Derek needing something to remember him by just in case.

thank god your heart is too close by hoars

There's a boy, ("Fuck you, dude. I'm seventeen. Not fifteen." Stiles laughs in his memory) waiting for him back home.

Let your unfaithful weaving go by DarkAthena (seraphim_grace)

Every night Stiles goes into the feasting hall to work on the shroud he is making for his husband, knowing that the alphas circle him like sharks until he is inevitably forced to choose one to stand as his alpha and Eli's regent. It's been four years and he doesn't know how much longer he can do this. This is based on the story of Penelope and her suitors, with Stiles in the role of Penelope, the wife of Odysseus

An Alpha's Misunderstandings by Dexterous_Sinistrous

And Derek was there, as if it was a simple twist of fate. There were so many ways Stiles wanted to forgive Derek, but then he came to his senses. He wouldn’t risk Charlotte’s safety for that hope–never again. ~*~ Stiles and Derek are parted by war and misunderstandings, only to find each other again.

A Princely Knight by Dexterous_Sinistrous

He would stand by Stiles’ side, a constant shadow of protection until his death. A life for a life, one worth much more than an orphan turned thief turned royal guard could comprehend. In truth, Derek saw the one person he would gladly give his life for, because Stiles made this world better. ~*~ Or, Stiles is a prince and Derek is his knight.

of gods & monsters by Dexterous_Sinistrous

"I’m not the best at conversation. I’ve been told I have no finesse for it.” Stiles took a step closer to Derek, pushing the billowing silk out of the way. “And what would you say if you looked at me now?” Derek looked up, startled for a moment when he realized he was now looking at Stiles’ unveiled face. He was silent for a beat, taking in Stiles’ features for the first time, convinced he would never see such beauty unveiled for him alone.

sustain by bleep0bleep

Yes, there’s another person in the lab with them, someone who’s heart is beating steadily, sounding achingly familiar somehow, their blood sweet and cloying. Stiles drops the empty bag and rushes forward, because it can’t possibly be— that scent— who he thinks it is—

all stories deserve an end by bleep0bleep

No one hardly ever comes up to this area of the forest, especially with the rumors of the “mad wizard.” Stiles encourages the rumor, because it means people leave him alone. It’s a good, solitary existence as long as Stiles pretends the aching loneliness in his heart isn’t there.

Space Pirate Samba by Wrenegade (orphan_account)

That awkward moment when your fiance comes back from the dead as a space pirate trying to rob you and your sister's ship.

you're the only north star (dear god)

"I will go to the ends of the known universe, I will dive through a fucking black hole, I will walk unarmed with my hands tied into the Nemeton if it means getting him back," Derek says lowly. "But I can't do that if I haven't slept for eight days, and I can't sleep without Stiles."

I Still Believe by IAmAVeronica

War is hell. Falling in love with enemy solider Derek Hale, secretly mating him, and then accidentally being left behind by him when the war suddenly and violently ends is a special kind of hell apparently reserved for one human omega Stiles Stilinski. But Stiles is determined to find his mate again, because Derek left more than just Stiles in a war-ravaged and werewolf-hating country - and with danger at every turn and nothing but Derek's gun and his own wits for protection, hell hath no fury like Stiles now.

Recover, Reclaim, Retain by elisera

Derek stumbles through the camp half-blind, head feeling like cotton and knees trembling, the spell on him making sure he can’t fight the warlock leading him by a chain and he can’t--, can’t even fucking smell--. “No, no, no!” a voice suddenly says next to Derek and there is a hand fisting in Derek’s shirt, jerking him to a stop. “This one’s mine.”

I love this one as well, if you don't mind destiel, and I love sterek here:

Flesh and Bone by theinspiredginger

Dean's trapped in Purgatory looking for his angel when a not so subtle kid in a red sweatshirt asks to team up. Dean takes Little Red Riding Hoodie underneath his wing as they try to escape. Or the one where Stiles bargains with a witch to get sent to purgatory to save Derek and finds Dean instead. They work together to find a way out of Purgatory as they each look for their "person".

Also I LOVE their separation period in this fic, and the reunion is so delicious and beautifully written, my heart aches so good every time, AHHH, I adore it with my entire heart:

Actions Speak Louder than Words by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella)

"I apologize.” The cop finally looked back up at his face, seeming thrilled. “It’s just—it’s been so long. And we finally have you.” That was a bad word. Not found. Have. Stiles wrenched his hand free and took a step back, but before he could even think up a gameplan, he felt a prick in his neck and jerked away, reaching up to slap one hand against it and twisting in the same moment. One of the others had come up behind him while he hadn’t been paying attention, and his vision began to swim even as his eyes caught sight of the half-empty syringe the guy was holding.

Incandescent

"You are trying to court our alpha,” sang Lydia. “Surely you realize that he does not reciprocate.” “He doesn’t stop it.” There was no point in lying. Paige was courting Derek. She would be a fool not to. “He doesn’t care to.” Lydia arched her thin eyebrow. “Why do you think he’s still searching for his mate, hmm? Why didn’t he stop once you were here? You think you can annoy him into sleeping with you?” Lydia laughed. “He is a born wolf, darling. He will not fuck you if you are not his.”

Angel, Ignited

He was a fool to tell himself he wasn’t thinking of Derek. How could the moon not think of its sun? How, when the light of it — the sight of him — made him yearn to live? Stiles loved him before. Between their shared breath, upon their touch, after the tender words and giddy smiles, Stiles thought he knew what love was. He was a fool. This was love. This was how it felt. Annihilative. Mournful. Take all the air from his throat, he would still ask for Derek first.

Predators

He was born for this. Nature itself whispered into his ear where he should put his hands, how to twirl his tongue just right and when to bite. Stiles knew well enough that his saliva was currently working its magic on this unfortunate man, making him hungry, lustful, and insatiable. Soon, all his thoughts would be consumed by Stiles. And, just this once, Stiles would allow Derek to consume him.

The Happiest of All

"It’s every wolf’s dream. To find a perfect mate, to procreate. It’s a necessity, it’s healthy. It’s in our blood; akin to the moon in the sky, a wolf belongs to their mate. And humans don’t have the capacity to become a mate.” “But I love him,” Stiles whispered, begged. Talia stayed silent for a couple of minutes. “That’s why you should understand it’s not healthy for him to be with you,” her words were simple and clear, like a piece of glass, but sharp all the same. “He will not find true happiness with you. You’re wasting his time. Preventing him from having a future he deserves.”

Full and Void

Stiles could be meek, sure. In Derek’s arms, softened under the touch, pinned under his weight. He allowed himself to relax only in Derek’s sole presence. Stiles could also look meek. Small, scared. Let the enemies think he was hiding in his mate’s shadow. After all, no one would stop to think that the shadow could ever be dangerous.

[masterlist link]

[feastofdesires]

Being Secure In Your Relationship Is

the ability to help your girlfriend shop birthday presents for her “brother”. Except gege has held a torch for your girlfriend since they’ve been children. You tolerate the glares from him because it’s nothing in the face of years spent searching for her and existing in her absence.

He was happy to help you shop because it’s one of the rare times you actually want to use him and his wealth, so when you throw your phone across the couch in frustration and promptly throw yourself across his lap he can’t help but laugh. Gently rubbing his fingers into the back of your neck, he sets aside his book with a swirl of mist.

“Not finding anything, kitten?”

You lift yourself up to properly sit in his lap and toss your arms over his shoulders with an annoyed pout.

“He’s so hard to shop for! It used to be easy when we were younger, he didn’t have a complete model collection then. Now he has like, every notable model of a big metal thing that makes itself fly!”

You drop your head back to dramatically groan to lament. Of course Sylus took the opportunity to go for the kill.

The air filled with your shrill squeal and giggles as he bit and nibbled down the column of your throat. Your attempts to push him away were useless against his arms that pulled you tighter. It was only when Sylus made your neck peppered with red ghosts of his teeth that he leaned back with a devilish grin.

“You were saying?”

“Uh… Caleb has basically every model,” You started with a few deep breaths. Your cheeks were deeply flushed and your mind had to return from naughty places before you could continue. “Which sucks because it’s been a little tradition for his birthdays to get him one, then we’d put it together as a team. And this is his first birthday since…” you trail off, still having a multitude of complex feelings about his “death”.

Sylus was quiet for a time, thinking about your predicament. It left you time to play with his face in the way that you poked at his cheeks and squished them together until he tried to bite your hands.

“Not interested in terrestrial vehicles, then?”

“Just flying ones.”

—

Sylus is willing to do anything for you- including tracking down an ultra-rare, limited production model of a plane from the 20th century. Finding one still in its original packaging required him to travel 20 hours to a different country and haggle with an old man who didn’t want to let it go. He was glad the man was sensible when Sylus made it clear he wasn’t leaving without the kit. Violence is a tool to use with strategy. Sylus had already offered millions for the model, so a mere flash of his gun had the old codger taking the deal.

The old man had only made one other request- knowing why Sylus wanted it so bad.

“It’s a gift for someone important to me so she can gift it someone important to her.”

“Hah! You’re head over heels for your lady then? That makes it easier to let go of this then. I would’ve given my late wife the world if I could.”

Sylus glanced away for a second. He had, at first, wanted to exploit the man’s desires to reach his goal, but he only saw the deep longing for someone long dead.

“You gave her a lifetime of happiness.” Sylus eventually settled on while creating a little card with his mist. “I owe you a debt. If you ever need anything-“

“Bah!” The old man waved a hand. “Get going, young man. Your lady is waiting for you, yeah?”

—

When Sylus finally made it back, he detoured to Linkon and slipped inside your apartment. Setting the model on your coffee table had been his only task, but…

It’s deep in the night, and he can hear your soft breathing as you slept. He meant to leave immediately, but he just had to see you.

Moving in silence to your bedside, he found himself smiling, seeing you drool onto your pillow while clinging to Grumpy Crow. His hand started moving before he realized and only stopped inches from your face. You needed your rest.

He left your home, heart pounding in his chest after having whispered his affections to you. He worried about waking you up, but he couldn’t leave your side without saying how much he loved you.

—

Sylus was winding down for his own sleep when you FaceTimed him. He simply continued his routine as you spoke in a high, squeaky tone over the model on your table.

Brushing his teeth, he fondly watched as you were slipping on your hunter uniform, finally getting around to thanking him with glassy eyes.

“It was nothing, kitten. You better get moving, you have prey to hunt.”

He adored that fire that lit in your eyes as you nodded, heading towards your door.

“Right. I’ll text you later when I get off. Sleep well! Oh- and think about something you’d like from me in return for your hard work~ Okayloveyoubyyyeee!”

How was he supposed to sleep now when you laid that temptation at his feet before hanging up on him? You were such a sweet, evil trap.

[sepdet]

Can I just say I FUCKING TOLD YOU SO. The Artemis rockets built by Northrup Grumman that took NASA's Orion space capsule to the Moon and back in 2022 have 60+ years of proven industry tech behind them, so good riddance to the baby who can't make it in an established industry without billions of dollars in government handouts.

Unfortunately, I think DOGE fired a lot of the NASA senior administration who had long-established relationships with his competitors. At least, they seem to have been mighty strategic in getting rid of the older, more experienced strategists and policy makers. I wrote to my dad (former VP a few mergers before it became Northrup Grumman) and the Salt Lake Tribune a few months back trying to get the Republicans of Utah to make a stink, since Grumman is the main employer in the region, and it was a clear conflict of interest having Musk firing/appointing the NASA bosses in charge of deciding which aerospace companies got which contracts.

NASA has NEVER made its rockets. It's always contracted them out to US companies, the same ones that were building the missiles and rockets used since WWII. Unfortunately, military and space hardware go hand in hand. It's always been an uneasy alliance between the three: the aerospace industry, scientific research (with NASA's shoestring budget), and the military (with its gargantuan one, which is what supplies the longterm contracts, but they're happy for NASA to fund R&D). I wonder if Elon has even realized how much the military has shut him out, since unlike the companies you've barely heard of, he's terrible at keeping his mouth shut and staying out of politics.

Musk got subsidies because most of the old aerospace companies have merged into a couple mega-conglomerates, mostly Northrup Grumman and Boeing and RTX. More competition is good. But all he's ever been is a PR guy reinventing the wheel, standing on the shoulders of LITERAL GIANTS who built the Saturn V, Atlas, and all the other rockets that came before his. And since they were contracting with NASA, he had access to most of their notes/research as open source (Some of my dad's own research is up on the federal government's website).

Musk has had sixty plus years of other commercial, military, and scientific rocket research to draw on, but still makes idiot mistakes like failing to reinforce his launch pad against rocket exhaust so it blows to smithereens and fatally damages his rockets at liftoff, teething problems that the rocket industry solved in the FIFTIES. I am just so, so, so fucking tired of Musk fanboys imagining he invented the industry he only stays afloat in because the government gives him water wings as a startup in order to compete with the grownups.)

One of many reasons why underfunding nasa was a bad, bad idea.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I would like to ask a question about which classes all the characters (at best sophomores) study in, that is, I heard that Riddle and Azul study in the same class and something like that, I tried to search for information about it, but I couldn't (my difficulties with English) I write fanfiction, and when it came to classes, I realized that I didn't know anything about it.

Mmm... I'm not sure if I can provide a definitive list for all the classes that each character takes?? It's hard to determine for certain because the information shown in different iterations of Twst can differ (for example, the 4koma shows Leona and Idia sharing an art class, but this has never been shown to be the case in the game) and there are MANY times when different classes combine for "joint" classes in the game. There may also be multiple sections for a particular subject (such as multiple Magic History sections), changes in electives or classes for the new (January) semester, or questionable canonicity (technically, every student has an Apprentice Chef card, implying they all took the Master Chef/Culinary Crucibles elective in the same year?).

There are honestly very few instances in which Twst comes and outright tells you "Yeah, X, Y, and Z are in [insert course here]." A few examples that come to mind are Cater, Vil, and Lilia, who take Potion Refining together as a required third year elective (their other option for this elective spot was Abbreviated Spellcasting in Ancient and Modern Magic: Changes and Comparisons), and Ace and Sebek, who take Magic Analysis/Enigmics together.

You're probably just fine using the characters' homerooms to estimate who would be taking classes together (ex. Jamil and Azul, the 2-C boys; Ace and Deuce, the 1-A boys, etc.). You could even group together students in the same year for joint classes (ex. Malleus, Rook, and Lilia could be in P.E. together; Kalim, Riddle, and Jamil could be in P.E. together, etc.). The examples I listed here are all from actual in-game vignettes, so these are a good rule of thumb to go by. If you need further support to write the subjects or NRC curriculum, you can also visit my Resource Masterlist for more lore in those areas.

As for Riddle and Azul specifically, I don't actually recall them formally sharing a class, but they have had joint classes together. For example, Class 2-E (Riddle and Jade) are shown to have Musicology with other second years from other classes, such as Class 2-C's Azul. Maybe that's what you're thinking of...?

[srldesigns6277]

👋 Hi

Just curious. Has there been one specific event this year that has kept your faith in H&L still going strong? As a veteran you have seen it all..and since we only get mainly possible coding. Assumptions..and just our hopefulness.... love your blog!!

Hiya Lovely,

I apologize for not answering sooner, but this took some thought and reflection. And not because I suddenly don't think they are together or something. But because of other things outside of them have kept me believing this year.

Short answer: The Zouis Reunion

Long answer: Lol, it's me of course there is a long answer. I don't really ever have doubts about them anymore if that makes sense, I know what I have seen both through computers and the naked eye during the band. I remember watching livestreams of concerts from Iphone 8's in 2015, to watching videos of Louis at Harry's concerts during Live on Tour. So knowing they are them has never been the issue. For me it was always when is the narrative going to change.

When I left the fandom in 2019, things were fracturing. Louis had yet to release anything other than a few singles, Harry was still on hiatus after LOT the original. We hadn't heard anything but whispers from Zayn. Liam was starting to ramp up promo, but at the time I was pulled away from the fandom, and Niall had really just finished The Flicker Tour, and the Narrative hadn't changed, they weren't allowed to be even friends beyond the constructed divide from years previous, Narry and Lilo.

But in coming back, while the narrative hadn't really changed, there were changes to it. The reforming of the Zouis friendship over the past 4 years has really showed me exactly what the narrative of 2014-2015 was supposed to do, fracture the fandom to fuck with the boys, and it worked for a while. But seeing Zayn and Louis hang out, seeing Liam go to Niall's concert, Seeing Narry go to each other's concerts, Louis talking about being nervous if he has one of the other boys in the audience, especially Harry. Those things tell me the narrative is changing. That the media perception of the boys was always bullshit, and not just something that took a few years to see through, for me that was mostly not being mad at Zayn, but I realized that in 2017, thankfully.

Seeing the Zouis friendship rebuild tells me the narrative we were fed for years, is changing. Yes, slowly, but it tells me that things are happening and would have happened more if not for Liam's passing too, something no one expected, ever. I think we will continue to see changes after this stunt is over and after the band anniversary in July.

For me, it's always been the subtle things. The way Louis used to gently put his hands on Harry's back during group hugs on stage, while basically pulling Liam's neck down with his other arm. Or how as social media grew, the gentle way you could sometimes hear Louis talking to Harry, or Harry softly rubbing his knuckles against Louis's tattoos in 2012 and 2015. Its getting to see the dicklace for the first day of Pride, this year, or them color coordinating their outfits on the first day of Pride while on tour. Its Louis making a subtle rainbow with his close over the course of FITFWT.

When it comes to Larry now I always think of a song by J-Hope and Jungkook of BTS called "I wonder..." where JK sings about a long standing love between people with the lyrics:

This love, right now (It's) all we got, all we need We're happy right now (So) why don't we ride this feelin'?

Just dance right now (But) don't you stop lookin' forward? Just enjoy it, this love (We) can keep forever fallin'

[crowwolf]

Kitalia is the definition of manic chaotic pixie chick...She's 700+ years old, some of that in Faerun, some in the Feywilds (only people close to her have an idea of her age - she does not look old). She had a really REALLY bad first few centuries. She's half mixed fey creature (as in more than a few different types), a quarter wood/sylvan elf, and a quarter something else (*no spoilers* {Alex Kingston is Queen}). She's literally chaos. She spent far too long just in survival mode - doing what she had to do in order to survive. She's a shadow magic sorcerer/college of glamour bard. Girl loves music and will sing without even realizing it. BUT because she's old as fuck, some of her taste are old too.

Greensleeves - Loreena McKennitt version. Picture this sung by a woman to a man. Kit's been betrayed a lot, but when she does give her heart it's ALL of her. She would give and do anything for the ones she loves. Picture her dressed in the Tudor style, playing a harp, her heart breaking as she sings this.

Burn Your Village Down - Kiki Rockell. This is pretty much her theme song. She's been abused, horribly, but she's come into her power and will fuck a bitch up if they touch her or her fam the wrong way. Hell, if they look at them the wrong way. You slayed that dragon? Aww that's cute - I can talk to it and make it my bitch.

Savage Daughter - Ekaterina Shelehova. If you've ever listened to this one, it's pretty self-explanatory. Kitalia will never fall into line, she's a woman who will never again be hushed or shoved into a corner.

In the Air Tonight - Marilyn Manson version. Listen, I know MM is a shit stain, but I love this version (Phil's is still the OG) for Kit. She 100% holds a grudge and if you fucked around, you'll find out pretty fast how that works.

Krigsgaldr - Heilung. Kit's old. She no doubt heard stuff like this in her original village. The horns of battle. The call of the old ones. She disassociates and this is the music she hears...

Umbrella - Rihanna. If your close enough to her to know she's old and more powerful than anyone realizes, then you are locked in with her for life. She will die so that you can live. 100% her mantra for her besties/loves ones -

"When the sun shine, we shine together Told you I'll be here forever Said I'll always be your friend Took an oath, I'ma stick it out to the end Now that it's raining more than ever Know that we'll still have each other"

Bezerk - Eminem. Chaotic, loud, unapologetically her.

@vera-king-hrfl I feel like I'm missing one or two...the heat is melting my brain...

No pressure tags @faerunsbest @ashprince-of-bel-air @ladyofcrowsandcoffee

YOUR OC PLAYLIST

Just post a picture of your OC with a Playlist of songs that you feel fits your character or their story.

I'll begin using my character, Tove Elunthir. She is my other OC, Sion Elunthir's twin sister. Both were raised in a Druidic circle.

🪷 Bloom For Me - Pearly Drops

🌌 Stream Of Consciousness - Lola Young

🐝 Hunnybee - Unknown Mortal Orchestra

🏺 Urn - Crying City

🥀 Me and the Devil - Soap&Skin

👁 Verónica Pass - R. Missing

No pressure tags! : @bg3screenshotdump @wasteful-sam @aoifethephoenixqueen @fromdawntiltwilight

[diamondsunbursts-and-marblehalls]

THE WAY SHE'S HOLDING ONTO HIM.

she just got him back a second time and she's not letting go. something something "you're not getting away from me. never again"

[airoarts]

Leader and deputy

[Image description: a digital painting of Squirrelstar and Ivypool from Warriors. Squirrelstar is a small dark red cat with green eyes, standing in front of the much taller Ivypool, a gray tabby-and-white cat with blue eyes and many battle scars. The background is dark blue. end ID]

[they-didnt-last]

anyone interested in talking about the iconic 2000's middle-grade-bordering-on-ya book series gallagher girls??

[multifariousmediums]

Closeups and process video under the cut!

[Video: Timelapse of the piece, starting with a rough sketch, then a m more detailed one. Clothes are added on in a third layer, and then the piece is lined and colored in. End description.]

[mosspodge]

HEY MOSSY WHATS UR FAVORITE SONG im looking for new music :]

first of all, thank you for the huge compliment!!! you should also know you are saying this to someone who spent 15 minutes listening to the spider man game pizza theme in the car yesterday so. Yeah!!!

All that sillyness aside, I listen to way too much music (my usual playlist is +1,300 songs) of way too many different genres and i am happy to share them with anyone and everyone!! Gonna try and limit this to 10~ish songs for now, since otherwise I will end up with a list 100 songs long lol. Also I am a rare Apple Music user so I'll try and link all the songs to youtube so that they're easier to listen to!!! also bc Spotify confounds me lol OK there was WAY more text than i thought so MUSIC RECS UNDER THA CUT

MOSSY'S COOL MUSIC RECS

DRIVING MY LOVE - Anri GOSH her entire TIMELY!! album is amazing, but this is the song that's been sticking in my mind the most lately. Citypop is a very fun genre of music that came about in Japan in the 70's, and Anri had (to me) some of the most fun songs in the genre :>

New River and Soap - The Oh Hellos OH BOY OH BOY THE OH HELLOS!!! I LOVE this band!!!!! If you were on art social media a couple years ago you probably have heard Soldier, Poet, King, which is by and large their most popular song. New River is one of my go-to songs when I am going through it. Absolutely love the imagery of the song, allowing new and difficult experiences carve new landscape through yourself. Soap, it is important to note, is the culmination of their four-part EP series Four Winds, and is kind of the resolution to that whole series of songs. It's really interesting and worth looking into! I must note that this is a Christian band in case you find that uncomfortable, but I would still recommend checking them out even if you do- the Four Winds EPS focus specifically on their struggles with God amidst the uh. Bad US Political Climate and all that. Most of their music on the topic is pointed and metaphorical (see: Passerine) and so that knowledge isn't super necessary to enjoy the music, I just think it's neat :] And not every song necessarily touches on the subject- these two specifically don't! Also I GOT TICKETS TO SEE THEM THIS YEAR LETS GOOOOO sorry this section is so long i just really like this band

No More What Ifs - Persona 5 Royal, covered by the 8 Bit Big Band Ok back on track lol. This song is absolutely my favorite from the game, but MAN THIS COVER. The 8BBB is one of the best video game cover bands out there imo, and they COMPLETELY outdid themselves with this one. They actually added a few extra lyrics to the song to better round out the overarching theme of both it and the game and MAN. i will never listen to another version again. The album this will be a part of isn't out yet sadly, but I would 100% recommend checking out their other stuff!

Bones in the Ocean (2023 vers.) - Longest Johns There's a lot to be said about this one but it's best if you just listen to it tbh. I will say that this is a new recording of one of the band's first original shanties, and that it includes all former and current members. Would highly recommend all the other songs on this album too, aside from this song it's a very fun listen! But ourgh this song,,,, if i had time I'd make a dozen animatics for it

エビチャーハン! (You’re Telling Me A SHRIMP Fried This Rice?!) - JamieP best miku song no quastion

'Tis Autumn - Nat "King" Cole Trio There's only one song to kick off the fall season and it's absolutely this one! Also The Autumn Leaves, which Nat King actually sung in Japanese once which is cool. He was an incredible musician and all of his songs are great, but Tis Autumn is probably my favorite :>

Catch You Catch Me (Card Captor Sakura OP) - Gumi Do you want to get ready in the morning feeling like a magical girl? Boy howdy do I have a song for YOU! Seriously the amount of people I've shown this song to under that premise who have come to me the next day saying that it worked is a lot lol. Card Captor Sakura has been a big comfort show for me and MAN the music is *chefs kiss*, especially the OPs!!! Linked the full song, but I would also recommend watching the opening itself :D

#41 - Dave Matthews Band "wow you like dave matthews lol thats such dad music" ok listen. I have been listening to DMB since before I was born. Saying I'm biased is probably an understatement here. But his songs are very good and I like them ok. Anyways #41 is a really stupid name for a song but I love the band in it, the weird lyrics, just the overall jazziness of it. If you wanna listen to more Dave stuff I would highly recommend the stuff from his solo concerts with Tim Reynolds- its just 2 guys jamming out on guitars, it's great. Stuff like One Sweet World, Still Water, Grey Street (This one's a tough listen for me but I love it). For the fun full band stuff I love So Much to Say, Ants Marching, just the older albums in general

Stay I Pray You - Anastasia (The Musical) I am allowing myself ONE (1) musical song. My sister is a huge musical fan and an even bigger Russian History nerd and an even BIGGER Bolshevik Revolution nerd so I watched Anastasia with her a lot growing up. Eventually they made the musical and it's actually tied for my favorite (Phantom is pretty hard to beat)! I got to see it tour and MAN. all the music is amazing, but this to me is the standout song- largely because this song, despite not being in the movie, actually was kinda in the movie- there's this bit in In the Dark of the Night that they took and made into a completely different song which is a fun nod to the movie!!

Music to Soothe The Savage Snake Plant - Mort Garson Got overwhelmed by my options at this point so I'm defaulting to one of my favorites! I believe another song off this album got popular recently, but I will forever know this one from it being used in the final scene in The Adventure Zone, my first and favorite DnD podcast! Honestly I could recommend a dozen songs from the podcast, but this one in particular always sticks out to me. While I'm here you should also go listen to The Adventure Zone, it's a great podcast, especially their first story (Balance, just start at the bottom lol).

wow that. was a lot more than I meant to write lol. Special shoutout to Virtual Insanity, the bane of my existence and my personal hell. It was my #1 most listened to song last year coming to a total of *checks replay* 239 plays, over 50% of which occurred within the span of a week. another shoutout to The Housebuilding Song. i swear i listen to you once a year how are you always in my top 25

[good-beans]

Please tell me about Lukas.

Sincerely, a poor soul who is obsessed with Milgram but knows very little about Fire Emblem.

Lukas is my beloved character of all time :) Comfort character to rival all comfort characters :) He’s just like me fr :) He’s so healing to watch heal :)

He’s from Fire Emblem Echoes, and for a good portion of the game he’s that mentor/tutorial character who helps you/the protagonist through the new world you’re thrown into. The thing was, they put together an incredibly complex asexual, neurodivergent guy who’s not really in it for the fighting (but is damned good at it anyway). They gave him the sweetest and saddest smile possible. They gave him the most relaxing voice you could imagine. They gave him two of the wackiest and complimentary friends. How could I not fall in love?

Basically, he reveals that he’s not involved in this whole war because he wanted to be – his father and brother conspired to send him away to fight for their own gain, not really caring if he lived or died. He took on the new life with just as much motivation as if he chose it himself, though. He’s not here for any dreams of glory or violence, he just wants to help the new friends he’s made ;-; He has a really big heart, but he’s not afraid to make the tough call and commit war crimes. He’s gentle to the child soldier protagonists, but is the first person to trust them and allow them into the army. 

Fire Emblem is notorious for its fanservice, which is why I will forever be Insane over his support conversation with one of those friends I mentioned. He describes his struggles with romance and desire, perfectly describing an asexual experience. His friend, Python, responds with so much kindness. It’s done with a lot of tact and respect, and was one of the final pieces to my own acceptance of my asexuality. 

Less intended, but he talks about his struggles with emotions that comes off as low-empathy neurodivergence, or a form of Alexithymia. He doesn’t feel strong emotions most of the time, then occasionally gets swept up in them and lashes out. (Sorry for all the tmi but) this is also something I struggle with. Though I come off overly excited online, I’ve dealt with the same coldness/heartless accusations he has. His writing and voice acting really drive it home, and it’s wonderful to see. Once again, he’s treated with immense respect for this trait. He feels self-conscious about it, but the cast sees that as a strength of his.

His relationship with the other two knights is super fun! I could go on separate rants about Python and Forsyth, but just know they are equally perfect. They all compliment one another so well, and hype each other up in such lovely ways. They've even got a fun RGB color scheme going on :3

OKAY I AM CUTTING MYSELF OFF because I could go on forever about him 😂 He holds such a special place in my heart -- it's silly, but thank you sm for asking :’) And, since you mentioned Milgram, this reminded me of a super goofy comparison to Yuno I made as one of my first Milgram posts, as well as my wips of the Fuuta-Lukas outfit swap I need to finish...