#it is tranny as fuck but did not hit me so hard i cried in the middle of it

[dreamyintersexouppy]

hey if you're a tranny and you do matrix memes but haven't just... sat down and watched it. do yourself a favor and do that, it really isn't a joke you will know that girl on the screen and you're allowed to cry about it, genuinely just do it

[metaphysical-human-being]

Roman

A/N: I wrote more fic because polotics and because the bees made me

Warnings: transphobia, horrible parenting, Remus being Remus, t-slur, swearing, crying, purposeful misgendering, tell me if there are more!

Ships: none

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Roman checked his bag one more time. He needed to make sure he had everything. 

Shuffling through his bag he let out a long sigh before rushing into his bathroom. He was forgetting about toothpaste and toothbrush. 

"You sure you got everything? And you remember the code to use if it goes bad?" Jasmine, Romans best friend, said over the phone.

"Yeah, Jazz. I triple checked everything." Roman announced, placing his toothbrush in his bag along with his toothpaste. 

"Good, did you forget your sword?" Jazz asked. She knew how much he loved his sword.

"Nope! In my bag. Along with my keys, my masculine clothes, my binder -thanks for that, again. You're amazing- brush, shampoo, school stuff, my charger, toothbrush and toothpaste." He checked off. 

The girl chuckled. "Good. Can't forget that shampoo. I would let you borrow mine but my kinky ass hair shampoo is not gonna work with that white-boy hair you got." She said, smirk evident in her tone. 

"Oh ha ha," he mocked. She was always doing that but he didn't actually mind.

"Now," she got serious again. "Tell me the plan one more time."

"Okay," he took a seat on his bed. "I'mma put my stuff in my car and come out to my mom after dinner. If she reacts badly then I text you the code word-" 

"Which is?" She interrupted.

"Chicken butt. Then I drive to your house and stay at your place until my dad gets back from his trip. Then I tell him. If he reacts the same as my mom then I stay at your place. If he reacts how we think he will then I can just stay with my dad permanently. If my mom reacts well then I just stay at my place and tell my dad when he gets back." Roman explained, one more time. He knew this plan to heart, they've been planning it since he first told her when he was thirteen that he wasn't a girl. 

"Good. Good luck out there, soldier. I gotta go prepare your room in case she reacts the way we assume. Love ya, bye!" She hung up. 

Roman let out one more sigh before he heard a knock on his door. He looked up and saw his younger brother, Remus, standing there. 

"What do you want, peasant?" Roman asked, earning a glare from the younger boy. 

"Two things. One; what's that stuff on your bed? Two; dinner time." He said in his sing-song voice.

"None of your damn business and okay. I'll be down in a sec." Roman shot back. He didn't want his brother to know anything. He'd tell his mom immediately and the plan will have to happen early. 

"I would be nicer to me if I were you or I'll cut off your boobs, slice them up, bake them in a pie and feed it to you." The 12 year old hissed before flipping him the bird and running off downstairs. 

Roman grabbed his stuff and went downstairs, passed the kitchen and outside to his car. He got it from his dad when he first turned sixteen a couple months ago. It was old and not the best but it was his most prized possession for he knew that his father had been saving up the money since Roman was eight so he'd be able to have it for his sixteenth.  

Quickly, he placed his backpack in the passenger seat and briskly walked back inside. 

"Why'd you go outside?" His mother, Aleiya, asked. Her perfectly sculpted eyebrow raised as if asking him what he was up to this time.

Roman looked down at his phone in his hand. "I just left my phone in my car." He lied through his teeth. He's gotten good at it, being an actor and all. 

His mother just gave him a slight nod before telling him to go hurry up and wash his hands. 

After a quick prayer the family started eating. Remus went on and on about his day, saying a lot of… questionable things. 

"-and I was sitting in class thinking 'hey? What would it be like if I tied up my teacher by his ankles and shove chalk so far up his a-"

"Okay! That's enough out of you." His mother pointedly stared at Remus. Remus just shrugged before going back to his food. 

"Roseanne, sweety, how was your day?" His mother asked. Roman just shrugged before shoving more food in his face. He was too busy going over all the different scenarios in his head to answer. 

"Oh! Mom! I wanted to tell you something!" Remus spoke up once more. His mother turned to her youngest child and told him to go on, although to keep it pg.

"Y'know that dick RoRo wants?I know where we can get him one. I know a guy," He said, simply. His wide, kinda-but-not-really innocent smile on his face. Absolutely no idea about what he had just done.

Romans eyes widened while his mothers darkened. 

"Remus, sweety," she asked, so sweet it was sickening. "What do you mean by that?" She asked, venom dripping in her words. Roman tensed up. 

"Y'know? The dick that Roman wants. I know where we can find one!" Remus said, pointing at Roman. 

His mother's face twisted into something down right nasty.

"Remus, sweety ...who's Roman?" She asked, glaring daggers at Roman just across the table. 

Remus giggled as if this was the funniest thing he'd ever heard.

"You're looking at him, silly….oh, wait. He was gonna tell you after dinner, right? That was the plan you and Jazz band were talking about...hm, oh well." He rushed, shrugging it off as if it were that simple. Roman kinda wished it could be. 

"Anyway, can I have a worm and Beetlejuice shake for desse-"

"Rose." She said, voice hard and angry as she cut off Remus. 

"Is what Rem saying...true?" Roman just opened and closed his mouth, looking like a fish out of water.

"Is. It. True!" She yelled at him, standing up from her seat and slamming her hands down on the table. Remus flinched. Roman looked at his food.

"Yes." He murmured. That's where shit hit the fan. 

"Get out of my damn house." 

"What?" Both Roman and Remus squeaked. Remus didn't know this would happen. He….he thought he was helping. Not getting his older brother thrown out. 

"You heard me, tranny. Get out of my damn house. This ain't no pride parade. Get your shit and leave!" She spat, sitting back down and glaring at Roman.

And with a huff and a glare, Roman left the table.

Remus stared as his brother shoved back the seat and stormed out of the house, making sure to slam the door as loud as possible. 

Everything went according to plan. Roman texted Jasmine and went to her house, struggling not to cry on the drive over. The minute she opened the door he was in her arms, sobbing. She rubbed his back and told him to let it all out. 

That was the first night Remus cried himself to sleep.

- 

After a few days, Romans dad came back home. Roman texted him, asking to meet at a coffee shop so he could explain why he wasn't at his mother's. 

Remus had told him that their mother refused to even acknowledge she had another child so their dad was really confused.

"Hey, dad! Over here!" Roman called, waving to his father when he saw him enter the shop.

The man in question, Paul, walked over to the table and took a seat right across from him.

Just looking at the pair you could tell they were related. Roman got most of his looks from his dad. He got his dad's dark brown eyes with specks of gold. He also got his dad's light brown, almost blonde hair. He got his tan, sun kissed skin and his splatter of freckles. The only thing he got from his mom was his smile. 

He gave Roman a politeful hello and asked how he's been. They had a small conversation before his dad asked the big question. 

"So ..why'd your mother kick you out?" His dad asked, setting his phone down on the table. Roman took a gulp before he started to explain the events of a couple nights ago. His dad didn't say a thing while he talked. He only nodded his head and let him explain. 

"So…." His father started when Roman was all done explaining. "What I'm hearing is that whole thing when you wanted to be called Roman….that wasn't a phase?" His father asked, pressing his lips together. 

Roman nodded his head. 

"Well ...okay then. So, your name is Roman now and you're a boy?" 

"Uhm..well yeah. I mean, I guess I've always been a boy really," Roman rubbed his neck and looked down at a stain on the table. " I guess I just realised that I was one." He said, a small smile on his face as he looked back up at his dad.

"And when did you realize this?"

"Uhm, when I was thirteen, I think,"

"Geez, kid. Thirteen? That's some time.."

"Heh...yeah…"

"And that's why you've been buying all those guys clothes-"

"Yep"

"And acting more suspicious. Never letting me see your phone or anything-"

"Uh-huh"

"Wow," his father sighed. "I….I don't know what to say,"

"Look, dad," Roman started. "I know it's weird and new and stuff but I need you to know that I'm not gonna just stop being trans. This is who I am and...if you don't like it then...well then I guess you won't see me for a while." Roman said, putting on a brave face even though he was absolutely petrified. 

His father's eyes widened before he started shaking his head. "Kid! Of course you're not gonna stop and I would never make you! I….I know I'm not the most...what's the word? Uhm-"

"Educated?" Roman tried, hope blossoming in his chest. 

"Yeah. I'm not the most educated person on the planet but...you're my kid. I'm not gonna stop loving you just because the hospital got it wrong," his father smiled, tearing up a bit at the thought that his da-...son would ever think he could ever not love him.

Roman smiled from ear to ear, practically vibrating in his seat at the amount of joy he was feeling. He launched himself into his dad's arms, crying happy tears as he thanked him over and over. People in the coffee shop who had been overhearing beamed at the father and son as they both laughed and hugged. 

After Roman pulled himself together they left, both grabbing a pastry on the way out. 

-

After that Roman decided to stay with his dad for the rest of...well, as long as he stays at home. They had to get his mother's permission but all she said was;

"I don't fucking care what the hell you do with that bitch! She's not my 'son'. I had a daughter, not whatever that is. Do whatever you want with her! Throw her in a garbage can and let the rats have at her, I don't care. Now stop asking me."

Let's just say, there was no argument and Roman was legally allowed to stay with his dad full time. Soon after, though, Remus came along. He says it was because his mom became a bit bitchy and annoying after he told her he was gay, and that was a big reason but he had been planning to runaway and live with his dad ever since Romans mother kicked him out. 

Life wasn't perfect and Roman still had his days, but with the help of his dad, brother, and friends he was able to get through it. 

(He even got himself a boyfriend, but that's a story for another day)

[schrodingers-fag]

A frank/matt fanfic (tw: violence, transphobia, slurs, swearing, alcohol)

This is a first draft! So please forgive any errors I’ve made. I’m honestly not very proud of it but I wanted to post it.

Matt and Frank walked down the quiet streets of Hell’s Kitchen, arms linked. Frank loved to stare at Matt because he knew he couldn’t see it. And Matt loved it when Frank stared at him, and he’d never tell him he knew when he was doing it. Ahead of them a man was stumbling towards them, the stench of alcohol wafted towards them. Matt cringed, his nose crinkling. 

“Jesus, this guy must have drank the whole bar.” Frank muttered with a chuckled. Matt laughed, squeezing frank a little tighter.

As the man got closer her started to yell. “Oooh man, you’re a lucky one. Who’ss that ho-ot piece of ass you got with you? I’d love to take her home and do s-some things to her if you know what I mean.” he barked out a laugh, slurring his words.

Matt froze, squeezing Franks arm out of fear. He put his face to the sidewalk, trying to calm his racing heart.

“What the fuck did you just say to me!? I’ll kick your ass for talking to him that way you piece of shit.” Frank yelled, his voice filled with rage.

“He? What are you talking about- Oh fuuuuuck. You got yourself one of those trannys don’t you?” the drunk man laughed once, finally close enough to see Matt’s face.

“Frank..don’t do anything stupid.” Matt murmured, turning his face away from the man.

“I won’t baby, don’t you worry.” he pulled his arm away from Matt and rolled up his sleeves. “Alright, I don’t know who you think you are, but you got no right talking to him that way. And if you don’t apologize and get on your way right now then we might have a problem.”

“And why would I apologize for that? I mean it should just be glad I’m looking at it. I should take it home and teach it a fucking lesson. Maybe then it’ll start being the woman it really is.” the man grumbled. He reached out suddenly and grabbed Matt by the collar, causing him to let out a yelp.

“Don’t you fucking dare touch him.” Frank said, grabbing his arm so hard that man had to let go.

“Frank..I can handle my own problems.” Matt said, straightening his collar and fixing his glasses.

“Exactly, this is between me and this he/she over here.” The man said, trying to escape Frank’s grasp.

“No sir, if you would kindly stop referring to me as those names, I’d really appreciate.” Matt said, giving him a slight smile.

“I’m just calling you what you are, tranny.” he smirked, spitting on the ground in front of Matt.

“Frank, would you please let go of this man?” Matt asked, taking out his cane. Frank looked concerned and a little unsure but he reluctantly let go and took a step back. “Now sir, that behavior is unacceptable.” Matt said and hit him with a sharp blow to his shin, causing the man to fall to the ground.

“FUCK! What the hell are you doing lady??” he exclaimed, clutching his leg.

“Think of this the next time you want to disrespect a transgender person.”  Matt leaned down and grabbed him by the arm. He yanked him up and pinned his arm behind his back, the man squirmed under his grip.

“F-Fine! I’m sorry man, I didn’t mean it just let me go!” he said his voice frantic.

“You better be sorry, or I’ll come back for you. And don’t try going to the police, because not only do I have a witness that says I didn’t do anything to you, and that you harassed me, but would they really believe you gotten beaten up by a bind man?” Matt asked, a smirk on his face. Before the man could answer he spun him around and took a swing at his face. The blow landed with a smack and the man cried out in pain. Matt tossed his cane to Frank and proceeded to punch the man in the stomach and he fell to his knees. He kicked him in the side so he would fully fall to the ground.

“Now, we’ll be on our way.” he said, trying to catch his breath. He fixed his clothes and reached out for Franks arm. 

Frank resumed the link between, a grin on his face. “I really love it when you do that.” he said.

“I didn’t want you to have all the fun.” Matt said, giving him a peck on the lips.

“Well I’m sure we’ll have lots more fun when we get home, because honestly that was super hot.” 

[ilovemygaydad]

No One [part 1]

from the friends in dark places au

pairing: toxic roman/oc

summary: someone from school makes an insensitive joke that sends Roman spiraling into some old memories of past trauma

WARNINGS: (none of the sexual elements are explicit, merely mentioned and implied) non-consentual sex, sexual assault, date rape drugs, drug usage, implied underage sex, blackmail (in the form of cp), transphobia, transphobic slurs, forced coming out, misgendering, food mentions, rebellious behavior, insensitive comments, crying, physical assault, PTSD, and possibly something else

tag list: @hufflepuffgirl01 @cocobearthe4th @cas-is-a-hunter @band-be-boss-blog @theunoriginaldaisy

a/n: jsyk, it’s totally okay to ask for a modified chapter if you need it or if i need to add tags! i get it, and it’s no problem for me to quick edit a chapter or whatever :) also, feel free to send requests or questions that you have!

a/n 2: hey so this story is super dark and shitty, so please read with caution! i’m happy to summarize for anyone who needs it!!!

first of main plot - companions

consider buying me a coffee (please)

-

October 19, 2016

Roman shut the door to the practice room silently. He knew each nook of the choir room, including which doors were particularly loud. His back hit the door with a soft thud, and his tears softly dropped onto the carpeted floor. He slid to the ground and let out a choked sob.

Luke. Luke knew that what he said was terrible and awful.

“You could pat Roman Patrick on the head, and he’d accuse you of sexual assault.”

“Ro? Mrs. Taylor told me that you’re in here… Are you okay?” Patton’s muffled voice asked from the other side of the door.

“I’m fantastic, Patton! I just needed a few minutes of quiet before I tried to traverse the parking lot to grab my costume from Hannah’s car.” Roman tried to insert as much of his normal flare into his speech, but he knew that it fell flat.

“Roman, let me in.”

The crying teen begrudgingly stood up and flung the door open. A worried Patton stood opposite him, and Roman was well aware that his puffy eyes and wet cheeks did nothing but make his friend more upset. He sighed, gesturing for Patton to come inside.

After the door was closed, Patton spoke up again; his voice was very quiet. “Was it Luke?”

“Yeah,” Roman admitted.

“What did he say?”

“‘You could pat Roman Patrick on the head, and he’d accuse you of sexual assault.’”

Patton paced the small room. “That douchebag! Are you fucking kidding me? He can try to ruin my life, sure, but making fun of your abuse in front of you when he knows how easily it triggers you is just too far!”

“Patton, it’s fine—“

“No, it isn’t!” Pat cried, throwing his arms out in fury. “It’s terrible! He knows what happened to you, and he is in no place to be talking about falsely accused sexual assault!”

“It’s in the past…”

---

June, 2014

Roman quietly slid through his cabin’s window into the quiet night. He normally wasn’t one for this level of rule-breaking, but he was in love! He’d do almost anything for Ethan, and that meant a lot.

Two of his fingers were kept over the head of his flashlight as he made his way to the pier, only allowing a small sliver of light to shine out so that he could avoid twigs. Roman was so excited to have found someone who liked him back that he didn’t care about the consequences. He was going to be a freshman, after all, so it would make sense to begin to have relationships, right? Ethan was kind, caring, and funny—everything Roman wanted in a guy.

“Roman! Oh, good. I thought you weren’t going to show up,” Ethan whispered, a smile creeping on his face.

“Of course I’m here! What do you think of me? I’d never leave you hanging, dearest.” Roman gave Ethan a deep kiss. When they pulled apart, Ethan held up a finger to signify for Roman to wait, bringing a tiny thermos from behind his back.

“Salted caramel hot chocolate. I know how much you said you like caramel.” He passed it over, untwisting the lid as he moved. Roman took a huge sip, the cold of outside already sleeping through his pajama pants and shirt.

Ro coughed at the intense salty flavor. “Jeez, E, that’s really fucking salty. Good thing I’m really cold, or this would completely go to waste.”

Ethan smiled brightly, though Roman couldn’t quite place the emotion he got from it. They chatted for about twenty minutes before Roman began to sway on his feet. He was so tired and dizzy. He blinked a few times, shaking his head to try to collect himself.

“I, uh… I think… I think I’m gonna…” Roman mumbled, trying to get the slurred words he was thinking out of his mouth. He couldn’t seem to control his movements, and not a second later, he felt the hard ground hit his side. The last thing that Roman saw was Ethan’s evil smile as he drifted off to sleep.

---

Roman woke up with a foggy mind. What had happened last night? He remembered going to meet Ethan and drinking hot chocolate and then… Nothing. He couldn’t remember a single thing that’d happened.

The teen blinked a few times, trying to make some sense of his surroundings. They were bright, that much was obvious, and he was still wearing his binder. Someone stepped up to him, gently placing a hand on his arm. He flinched back from the touch. He didn’t know why, but he didn’t want anyone touching him.

“Hey, sweetheart, I’m sorry. It’s Nurse Elizabeth. A few campers found you by the pier drugged to hell in just boxers and a t-shirt, and from the looks of the campsite, I think you were sexually assaulted last night,” said the young woman in front of him, frowning deeply.

Roman wanted to throw up. Ethan had used him. Someone he thought he could trust. Someone he loved. And Ethan probably knew his secret, too. Oh, god.

“Hey! It’ll be okay. Just get some rest. You can answer questions later.” Elizabeth made her way to the door of the infirmary, turning at the door. “Someone’s been waiting to see you since the news got out. Would you like me to let him in?” Roman nodded half-heartedly. He heard a person greet the nurse before heading over. Ro didn’t look up to see who it was, preferring to pick at his fingernails instead.

A rough hand clasped at his face and ripped his gaze up. A muffled scream escaped Roman’s mouth as he locked eyes with Ethan, who had intense fire in his eyes. “You’d better not tell a soul that it was me, or your little secret will be let out, tranny whore!” Roman fought against Ethan’s grasp, but he was still too weak from being drugged. “I hope I’ve made myself clear. If I hear a word about this little exchange, either, I have some pretty outing evidence to show the camp. You’re my bitch now, Patrick.”

Ethan tore his hand away from Roman’s face and stormed out of the infirmary, leaving a panicked Roman in the bed. Oh no. This was worse than he’d thought. He had two options: he could tell everything to Elizabeth and subsequently be outed as trans to everyone in the camp, or he could do whatever Ethan said and keep his gender identity a secret. Neither was good. Roman shoved his face into the thin pillow and cried himself back to sleep. Maybe he could wake up from this nightmare.

---

January, 2008

Roman toyed with his hands a few times before stepping courageously into his parents’ office. He could do this. He swung his ponytail over his shoulder and adjusted his cargo shorts and T-shirt.

His mom was the first to notice his appearance. “Oh, Rosie! What happened to your dress?”

“She’s just changed, honey. She probably didn’t want to wear it anymore,” his father said, typing away at his computer.

“I wanted to talk to you and Mom about something important, Daddy. I… I, uh… Never mind, it’s stupid.” Roman turned back and started out of the office, but his mom stopped him mid-step.

“Rosalina, you can tell us anything; you know that. What’s wrong, honey?” Mrs. Patrick clicked her laptop closed and prompted her husband to do the same. Slowly, Roman turned to them; the sound of his sneakers squeaking on the wood floor was the only noise for a few moments.

“I’m a boy!” Roman blurted out. “I don’t want you to call me a girl anymore. I want to be called Roman, not Rosalina or Rosie. And more importantly,” Roman pulled a pair of kitchen shears from one of his many pockets and raised them, hacking his entire ponytail off and letting it fall to the floor. “I don’t want to look like a girl anymore. I am a prince, not a princess.”

His parents sat with astonished looks on their faces. Oh, Roman had messed up. He had taken his dramatics too far for once. His parents were going to be angry at him, and he’d never be called what he was. He’d be Rosalina forever.

“Alright, Roman. Welcome to the family.” His mother smiled brightly at him. There was no malice in her eyes, nor in his father’s.

“You know, Ro, I’ve always wanted a son. And you’re strong; you’ll be so good in the boy’s gymnastics league.” Mr. Patrick stood and scooped his son into his arms, hugging him tightly.

Thus, Roman Patrick had been born.

---

Roman had been so excited to go in to school on Monday to tell everyone that he was a boy and that his name was Roman. He was practically bouncing out of his seatbelt on the ride there. He ran into the school, barely saying goodbye to his mom, and skidded into his second grade classroom.

“Good morning, Rosie! How are you doing?” Mrs. Zander, the second grade teacher, greeted warmly.

“Actually, my name is Roman now, and I’m a boy!” Roman sat in his normal seat, but taped a piece of paper with “Roman” drawn on it in red crayon over his “Rosie” nameplate. Mrs. Zander looked at him, confused, but nodded. She went to her phone and made a few calls, looking quite serious, before going to everything in the room with “Rosie” on it and replacing them with a “Roman” label.

Students began to file in, many commenting on Ro’s new short haircut, to which he’d always respond, “I’m Roman now ‘cause I’m a boy!”

They looked at him as if he’d grown another head, but moved on without further comment. With each child, Roman’s enthusiasm lessened until he finally just gave up. Mrs. Zander made an announcement about Roman, and the kids just laughed. They got scolded, sure, but that didn’t actually stop them.

“Look at Rosie just wanting to get closer to the boys!”

“Rosie you can’t just decide to be a boy! You’re always gonna be a girl!”

“I don’t want to be friends with you anymore, Rosie. You’re a liar!”

The harmful comments continued for weeks. Finally, Roman couldn’t handle any more, and he begged his parents to take him out of school. Within a few days, they’d transferred him into an elementary school an hour away and moved into a temporary apartment nearby.

Roman walked into his new school nervously, taking his time to get to his new locker. It was nearly five minutes before he finally entered his new classroom.

“You’re new here, aren’t you?” a student asked. He wore a black polo and thick-rimmed glasses. It was the textbook nerd look.

“Um, yeah. I’m Roman,” he replied. Then, as if to clarify, he said, “I’m a boy.”

“Alright. My name is Logan, and I am also a boy. It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance.” And then Logan walked off.

(Roman totally had a crush on the nerdy second grader, but he wouldn’t realize it for a long, long time.)

The rest of the day went by smoothly. Correct name and pronoun usage by everyone and new friends left and right. It was amazing! He didn’t get the opportunity to talk to Logan any more that day, and little did he know that he’d become too intimidated by the cute boy to talk to him, but he was still grateful for his first “friend.”

---

Summer, 2014

Roman spent two more months bending to Ethan’s every whim to protect his skin. It didn’t feel much like protection, though. He was disgusted with himself, but he couldn’t go through the rejection and hatred that followed telling people that he’s transgender.

Slowly, he withdrew from most of his camp friends. It started with not allowing them to touch him, and then simply not talking to them. Each time Ethan’s fingers found their way across Roman’s bare skin, he felt like throwing up.

It’s better this way, he told himself.

It wasn’t.

No one found out. No one ever knew. No one felt the pain.

No one except Roman.

part 2