#it is super meme-able don't get me wrong

[lets-go-hurt-someone]

I guess there’s an alternative way to read it (there always is) but I actually think a Tav/Durge who kicks Ascended Astarion in the balls has managed the herculean feat of being way worse than the evil vampire lord.

It’s like this: you help him damn over 7,000 people to eternal torment in the hells, then agree to become his spawn. To celebrate, you guys have sex because now is the first time in months he feels safe enough to do so. And he feels safe with you, because you have always helped him, and he thinks you two are in agreement!

So after all that, you kick him in the balls and act like he’s the evil one?!

That’s an absolutely stone cold betrayal. Especially because it happens after sex. Especially if you think AA has just buried his trauma instead of healing from it! So to summarise… you assaulted your partner after sleeping with him under false pretences?! Cool, you just managed to make me take the evil guy’s side because that is way messed up.

Like damn, I would pitch a fit and leave too!

[hsyvers]

WHATCHA GOT THERE? - nakamura kazuha x 6th member!f!reader

SYPNOSIS; you and your girlfriend love cats. and you always joked about getting one. but what happens when you smuggle one back home without her knowledge?

NOTES; this is insanely fluffy...kazuha with cats...giggling and kicking my feet AGH this was actually self-indulgent. based after the icarly "whatcha got there?" "..a smoothie" meme ^_^ also slight reference to that one leniverse ep at the end LMAOOO let's ignore the fact that kazuha is a dog person ok....

you bite your lip when you slowly open the door to yours and kazuha's room, hoping that she isn't there. the small creature in your rain jacket purrs in fond response to your body heat.

you whisper softly to it before you open the door, looking down at your jacket, "shh, you're gonna have to be as quiet as possible, okay? i still don't know if she'll let me keep you or not."

opening the door fully and peeking in, you sneakily step into her room, sighing inaudibly when you see her sleeping form on the bed.

then, all of a sudden, "baby?" a soft voice calls you closer, before you realise you're actively trying to hide something. you quickly take a step back, just in case.

kazuha sits up in bed groggily, rubbing at her eyes, a grin on her face now as she tilts her head, "whatcha got there?"

oh god. curse the fact that she obviously had basic comprehesion and observation skills.

you look down at your coat, that had a small, offputing bump in the middle, "uh, a smoothie?

"what?"

"what?"

kazuha stares at you, confused, though her usual smile still graces her lips as she opens her arms in a hugging gesture. you approach her but you don't accept the hug, making her pout.

"are you okay?"

"me? oh, of course. i'm super fine actually."

"...you're rambling," she mumbles, sneaking another glance to your jacket, "you do that when you're hiding something."

"n-no, i don't," you protest.

"and you stutter whenever you lie," kazuha points out again, "baby, what's wrong?"

"meow."

kazuha's eyebrows furrow.

you facepalm.

kazuha carefully leans her ear closer to your jacket.

"meow?"

her face leans back with a half knowing and half concerned expression.

"baby, why is your jacket meowing?!"

her slightly bewildered tone causes you to bite the inside of your cheek nervously, "promise you won't get mad?"

kazuha's gaze softens even more so as she shakes her head, "since when would i ever be able to stay mad at you?"

"okay, so like," you open your raincoat and your girlfriend gasps when she sees a small black kitten in your hands, "wait, let me explain."

"i was on the way back and it was raining so heavily and i heard meows and you know how much i love cats. so i ran to the source of the sound and the poor thing was wet and hungry so i ran to the nearest convenience store and that's why i'm back so late then i dried her up before coming in and she loves my body heat and it's so cute but-!"

"baby," kazuha whispers, patting her lap, "come here, and breathe, okay?"

you take a deep breath before sitting on her lap, and feeling her arms link around your stomach from behind gives you a sense of comfort immediately.

kazuha seems to realise that you're processing your words still, so she uses her fingers to pet the kitten in your hands. you giggle when the kitten purrs even harder, bumping its head against her hand. then, she presses a kiss to your cheek and lays her head on your back, "are you okay?"

"mhm, thanks," you sigh, nodding, "anyway, i was scared you'll turn her away...and that chaewon will freak out about her."

kazuha hums in acknowledgement of your worries, "don't worry, i already love her."

that sentence makes all the tension in your body dissipate and she feels you melt in her arms, a soft chuckle escaping her lips.

"did anyone else see you come in with her?"

"oh my god, what is that," eunchae mumbles, poking at your stomach only to jump back with wide eyes when she hears a small meow, "why is there a cat IN your stomach?"

"she's not inside, what?" you stiffle a laugh with your hand, shaking your head at her words, "and as for you, why are you awake at 1 am?"

eunchae's mouth opens, then it closes. she thinks for a second before whispering, "i won't tell chaewon about it if you don't tell on me."

"deal," you roll your eyes when she points two fingers to her eyes and then back to you in a "i'm watching you" motion.

"well..? just eunchae...don't worry about it."

"and you do know we will have to tell chaewon sooner or later, right?"

"yeah," you sigh, holding your kitten closer at the thought. kazuha squeezes your hand then pet the cat's head, as though to imply that she won't let anything happen to either of you.

"okay! one more question."

"anything," you say, and you mean it, turning your face to look at her as she pretends to be deep in thought.

"can we name it eric?"

"no, zuha, we are not naming her eric."

[the-moon-files]

Aaaaa, hi!! I'm the anon who sent in the fairly recent ask with the Guide!Reader ideas (martial artist mention, Dehydrated Ganon, strength possibilities, Ganon not being able to escape from Guide!Reader's voice, etc)! I'm really glad that you liked my ideas so much!! 😊 I was so pleasantly surprised to see you expand on my discombobulated thoughts, haha! Thank you so much! ^w^ I loved reading them!!

I said that I made memes for the Guide!Reader/Space Orc concept, and now I shall deliver them >:D Firstly, I'm super sorry that I took so long to share these with you!! Life decided to kick me in the shins for a hot second 😭 And secondly, I made a LOT of images for this one,, Fair warning, this is going to take up a lot of space 😭 orz

But anyway!! Here are the text memes first:

Guide!Reader: We’re playing Scrabble. It’s a nightmare.

Wars: Scrabble? Scrabble’s great.

Guide!Reader: Not when you’re playing with Zelda, it’s not. She’s out here putting in words like “ephemeral” while I’m putting in “dog.”

☆

Guide!Reader: *pointing out Magic Powder* Legend, look, it’s the good kush!

Legend: …This is the Rupee Store, how good can it be?

☆

Ravio: Hi, welcome! Are you part of our Super Savers Shoppers Club?

Guide!Reader: No, I’m not.

Ravio: :D :) :| Oh.

☆

Legend, looking into a banged-up Water Temple: …It’s trash.

☆

Time, whenever Guide!Reader uses modern slang: We need IRL subtitles. What are you even saying.

☆

Guide!Reader: My Furby died in my arms when I was a child.

Hyrule, has no clue what a Furby is: I’m so sorry for your loss.

Guide!Reader: It wasn’t a loss. I had never felt more like a god.

☆

The Chain: *getting told off by Time*

Guide!Reader in the back: …

Guide!Reader: *starts playing the ukulele* 👁👄👁 🎸

Time: 🧍

☆

Four, talking about Guide!Reader: So, I’m interested in someone…

Dot: :D Oooh! What do they look like?

Four: *slow realisation*

Four: I don’t know

Dot: Wh

Dot: What do you mean you don’t know?

☆

Guide!Reader/Ganon, about hearing Guide!Reader every dang game: The universe has a sense of humour, and I respect the commitment to the bit, but girl please.

☆

Guide!Reader, to Link once they reunite with the Chain: Now… *puts hand on his shoulder* We’re back on our bullsh*t.

☆

Guide!Reader and Wild, meeting Sidon for the first time:

Guide!Reader: …Would.

Wild: Would what?

Guide!Reader:

Wild: (Name)? Would what?

☆

Wind: When you become famous you’re called a legend because your leg ends.

Guide!Reader: What? 

Wind: Your leg. It ends.

Guide!Reader: I’m not a linguist, but I think you’ve got it wrong.

Wind: Are you saying your leg doesn’t end?

Guide!Reader: I mean, at some point it does, yes.

Wind: Then what’s the problem?

☆

The Chain, waking up at dawn to get ready:

Guide!Reader and Sky, just trying to process being alive:

☆

Guide!Reader/Time: You need to get out of bed faster than this.

Sky, struggling: I’m giving it all he’s got, boss

☆

Guide!Reader at Ganon: Your anger amuses me. Please don’t find inner peace. Please.

☆

Guide!Reader, playing through LoZ game: *at an annoying NPC* Let me ask you a very fair question. What do you do successfully? Quickly. :|

Link, trying not to laugh:

☆

Hyrule, probably: I hate it when a recipe tells me to add two cups of onions. They don’t come in cups. They come in onions.

Guide!Reader, head in hands: Please

☆

Hyrule/Twilight, looking at two NPCs: Are they lovers?

Guide!Reader, who knows the lore: Worse.

☆

The Chain, enjoying Guide!Reader’s affections:

Legend: 🚶‍♂️🚶‍♂️🚶‍♂️

☆

Legend, defending himself from the “You like him” allegations from Wind: 🤸🤸🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️

And now, onto the images- I hope you don't think the sheer amount of these memes is too excessive or anything!! 😭 /gen

Aaa and that's all the memes I've got! I hope you like them,,! orz

I'm also still pretty new to Tumblr, so I'm sorry if the format looks a bit weird,,

Oh, but also?? That last point you mentioned in your most recent post about the cultural differences between humans and Hylians on physical affection/touch?? I am VERY excited to see that,, 👀 👉👈 

U HAVE NO IDEA HOW IN LOVE W/UR BRAIN I AM RN

IM SO FUCKING ECSTATIC TO SEE THESE >>> ANYTHING IVE EVER WRITTEN U MADE MEMES??? FOR MY BS?????? DAOHGHOAKJSALKGFS;NDFKNDNFKJBDBFLN;

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

BLESS YOU, BEHEAMOTH SCREAMOTH MY BELOVED <3333

HAVE THAT HYLIANS V. HUMANS AFFECTION CULTURE POST HERE, THE ONLY PAYMENT I CAN THINK OF FOR THIS 😩😩 🛐 🛐 🛐

I LIED ITS TOO LONG, ITS GONNA BE A SEPERATE POST COME BACK AND PLS READ IT AS PAYMENT (but dont read the nsft/w if ur a minor)

BRO u got all the energy, and the dynamics i was pushing ilysm 🥺🫶

like the Hyrule = beloved agenda ive been pushing, bc i need more underrep links content, the way u carried the ganon eternally getting haunted by guide reader voice?? 10/10 ahdsfkhadl

AND WIND’S CONSTANT ENERGY OF A YOUNGER BROTHER LOOKIN U DEAD IN THE EYE LIKE “u kiss the homie (singular not even plural) goodnight?? Brother, that’s GAEY.”

u have no idea what this means to me, the impact, the understanding u have to have of my bs to make these, and how many posts youve read of mine?? im so sorry for ur loss w/my rough writing lmao

thats how you know youve made it tbh is if someone makes memes of smth u made, anyway day brightened, complexion clear, depression medicated, by this post

I HOPE BOTH SIDES OF UR PILLOW ARE COLD, UR PETS CUDDLE U EXTRA, U GET ALL THE GRADES/GOOD WORK SHIFTS U NEED

Peace out my beloved <3,

🌙

[rxttenbxnes]

Hello! Do you have any fun headcanons to share about Idia? Honestly, I just find it painful to see how badly this guy gets butchered in headcanons sometimes. People always forget that he is in fact a complete ass with a massive superiority-inferiority complex and not just a sad boi, or they overplay the weeb part and ignore how he has other interests like science and art, or they make him too pathetic by assuming he would still be a blushing incoherent mess like a year into marriage, etc. Anyway, it’d just be nice to hear the headcanons of an actual Idia fan since that’s the only way to get anything sane.

Omg totally, first I'mma do a little rant, I'll make sure to label where the HCS begin so y'all don't have to read my rants 😭

܀⊹ ིྀ🕸 ۫ ִ ׂ💭 ◟♡ ˒ ⊹ ݁ ִ  ۫🎮ೄྀ⊹܀

❱❱﹒⟡﹒𝑅𝑎𝑛𝑡﹢﹒🎮

Okay we gotta acknowledge the fact idia is indeed, an asshole you guys. 💀Well not completely obviously but he's not just gonna be nice to you for no reason. He's not just some depressed dude needing sympathy.

The way Idia is so Infantilzed by the fandom it's actually gets me tweakin, You guys this actually makes me mad, he's not some sensitive bottom uwu boy that stutters 50 times every sentence In fact I honestly cannot see him being submissive half of the time, this man is actually a asshole on the low. Most people get the fact that idia would be submissive from his shy and closed off personality which is just SO wrong to me.

Idia is extremely pessimistic and if we're being real Idia is actually not a good narrator for his own experiences, the constant self deprecation mixed in with his his thoughts about being superior to others is so fascinating to me, one moment he sees himself as nothing but a piece of trash while in the next moment he's boasting about how he's the only one component enough to be ignihyde's dorm leader. He's such a complex character I can Yap about him constantly

I get making jokes and stuff but some people genuinely think idia is some stinky incel creep that hates women and just purposely chooses to not go outside and be chronically online. Like yeah, he has nerdy and loser like hobbies but this man literally has trauma and chronic depression, along with an anxiety disorder, it's not something he can just make disappear. He likes science, engineering, art, anime, games etc which is all just cool, it's not like he's some creep that's afraid to talk to people, nor is he some super submissive guy that'll fold for you in a tiny interaction.

Had to get ts off my chest 💀

܀⊹ ིྀ🕸 ۫ ִ ׂ💭 ◟♡ ˒ ⊹ ݁ ִ  ۫🎮ೄྀ⊹܀

܀⊹ ིྀ𝐼𝑑𝑖𝑎 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠 🎮ೄྀ⊹܀

🎧 Caramelldansen. Idia adores this song unironically. At first he had just saw the meme and quickly ended up falling into the whole thing, laying on the floor completely dazed out of his mind as the colorful lights flash in the background from the music video playing on repeat lol

🎮 I said this in my earlier post but Idia definitely draws his crushes all the time. Luckily he has a little self control and draws anime/manga characters in most of the pages, he's really protective over his sketch book due to 1.) His social anxiety and 2.) The fact that he doesn't want anyone to know that he likes drawing and observing people, especially his crushes.

🎧 Idia constantly has his headphones on, I know of a fact that Idia listens to Nightcore, anime OSTs, Vocaloid, animation meme music, Vkei, video game sound tracks and breakcore religiously. I think idia would honestly listen to everything he can get his hands on

🎮 I feel like he had a 2020 alt kid phase lol. I feel like quarantine would've been his time to thrive, his peak enjoyment of life would be set during this time lol. Being able to express himself like he wanted without others seeing??? Sign him up

🎧 Ironically, he's not super weak. I feel like he just sucks at physical activity, especially running since he doesn't leave his room much. His hands/fist are definitely strong, I feel like he has a strong hit.

🎮 That being said, I think Idia’s hands are large, thin and boney. They definitely have a few scars and calluses from all the machinery he works with, you can't tell me that his hands aren't pretty rough.

🎧 Idia is a fashion icon, in games. Not irl, he would never due to the attention it would grab him, though he definitely is into all of the alternative and Gothic fashion stuff. He'll give his characters the most perfect and pretty outfits and make sure everything is customized perfectly, not mind at all if it takes him hours to do so.

🎮 This man definitely collects figures. I feel like they're all anime and video game figures; he's even commission artist and such to make custom work of his favorite interest and brag online about it.

🎧 Has an habit of repeating words and phrases he likes over and over again. It doesn't matter if it's from an obscure meme that literally only 5 people including him know or if it's in a different language, he'll constantly reference and repeat it like no tomorrow.

🎮 He's a biter. He bites a lot of things randomly, he'd bite someone out of love if he got the chance. I'm telling you he'll just naw on random stuff, not caring if it's edible or not. It could literally be a plushy and he'll randomly bite it while he's hugging it.

🎧 Idia definitely finds confort in the rain and gloom weather. Really, he just enjoys typically gloomy things. It's extremely comforting and relaxing to him to just be able to sit on his bed with his headphones on while it rains harshly outside, making the world around him dark and gloomy.

🎮 Curses, like a lot. Gamer rage is real you guys and he definitely has it. If he loses a game too many times or gets too frustrated with his teammates, he'll curse like a sailor. His anger isn't directly to his teammates or anything, it's of him being frustrated with everything in general.

܀⊹ ིྀ🕸 ۫ ִ ׂ💭 ◟♡ ˒ ⊹ ݁ ִ  ۫🎮ೄྀ⊹܀

[desultory-novice]

Noir's Field Trip - "Starting Out"

"...Thanks, you two."

-

Ahem! Following in the footsteps of several other Kirby OC contest peeps, you may send in asks for [Noir]!!

(...But I'm SUPER busy so it may take until May to respond! ^^;;)

[Notes/Rules About Asks:]

-I'm iffy on back-and-forth style dialogue-based RP, due to the complex interplay of pseudo-linearity in an amorphous situation plus my autistic-self often being unable to figure out what my RP partner is actually trying to say tone-wise or what they are thinking and then-I-answer-them-wrong-and-embarrass-myself...!!

NVMD SEND WHATEVER YOU WOULD LIKE XD

That and long post-chains make me a little nervous. ^^; Asks in the form of questions Noir can answer in-character are preferred.

(You may also ask me generic "What does your OC think/do when...?" style questions, such as those from THIS detailed OC ask meme!)

-You can also send an ask for Noir from your OC, if you'd like to find out how the troubled teenage boy would react to meeting them! (These may or may NOT(!!) come with art, depending on mood, time, and a variety of circumstances. Tourney OCs will generally get preference. If I AM inspired to draw said meeting, I may request additional information/clarification before going through with it.)

Again, I'm pretty autistic, so if you are going to go this route, it'll help if I have something more than "Hiya, Noir!" to work off of - else he'll just react to you the same way he does to Marx.

(Not that you can't go places from there! XD)

-You can also prod Noir about his traumas if you like! XD Note that asking for details about certain things (the "murders" on Shiver Star or his hatred of physical contact) may result in responses with TRIGGER WARNINGS, if I decide to answer them.

-Tournament!Noir is currently in his own similar but separate timeline from Mainline Apologies Noir. However, events during this contest MAY influence his fate and the fates of those he holds dearest!

-Noir's latent cross-dimension sight means that you can ask him about his various other timelines or Kirby games he was not alive for and probably get some pretty unique/funny/strange answers.

-I almost assuredly won't be able to get to every ask/comment. Some I may avoid answering due to complexity, uncomfortableness, them not fitting tournament!Noir's narrative, or me just not having any good ideas. Please don't take this personally.

-Lastly, please leave space between sending multiple asks. ^^

omg I'm so nervous about this. I want to draw lots, for me and for others (!) too if I can but I want to follow the flow of the tournament and not JUST go off on my own crazy thing, except that I'm not even completely familiar with what the rounds will be like?!

[Non-Ask Notes:]

-The flowers in the BG are the forget-me-nots that Adeleine drew for him on his birthday and that he received in this post. That post was also the inspiration for Tournament!Noir. (Although he retains the corruption + the collar here.)

PS: In addition the song that post is, you know, named for, Noir + the forget-me-nots also makes me think of the lyrics: "Since the day I met you, there's never ceased to be music in this hell of mine" from the opening to Sousei no Aquarion.

-This, and the tag name, was inspired by @Graycoin's comment "Noir gets to go on a field trip. I hope he has a good time : D " (then I saw Starflung had the same idea to send her OC off with a backpack! Haha! XD)

-The fish bone is a gift from Gooey. He's doing his best. Adeleine is also doing HER best. ("...A comb? Really?" "It's unbreakable!")

-As to the bento box, I'm not sure if I mentioned this before (?) but the Fontaine children are French-Japanese...on their mother's side.

-Why yes, that IS a cellphone in his backpack! I wonder who might call him...?

[apollos-boyfriend]

cellbit's books to the ones he cares for: translations

forever

page 1: forever, i don't even know how you must be thinking of me now. if everything has gone to plan, things must have been so weird that you've already started to suspect my infiltration plans. i believe that you're very intelligent.

page 2: the past few days have been a torture greater than i could ever imagine. what the census bureau did to me with that chainsaw couldn't compare to the pain to having to fight and lie every day to the people closest to me. feeling the deception hurts.

page 3: but it was the only way. the initial plan as to surprise you and the census bureau during the trial, but the vivo meme gave me the perfect opportunity to make a scene and make it look like i had some sort of motive to argue.

page 4: the census bureau doesn't understand feelings and wants too well, so this would be sufficient for it to believe my motives. it worked. i've never been so alone, but seeing you take up leadership and fighting so ferociously left me-

page 5: proud. everything is so much more difficult than i thought, but this was the only way for us to get any type of real information. after all this effort, all this fighting, all these enigmas, we still haven't found ANYTHING out about the federation. nothing.

page 6: i hope to be able to be there with you to explain this in person, but if you're reading this book, something probably went wrong. i was made to do things that i never would've done, and made to say things i never would've said.

page 7: and even trying to be apparent about my lies, even trying to make you guys suspect me, in the end, my plan . . . still went bad. and i know that probably no one on this island would trust me again. i burned all my bridges. but it was the only way.

page 8: i left a book to richarlyson in the beginning of it all, i didn't want him to have his heart broken, and maybe that was my biggest failure. but i was willing to sacrifice EVERYTHING to get this egg off this island. everything. and that's what i did.

page 9: tell bad i'm sorry for the things i said about dapper, to max about sofia, and to the french for the suspicion. i'm sorry for what i did to your XP farm, i know how long you and richas worked on it and every spawner that i broke was a-

page 10: stab to my heart. honestly, i think that they were already going to break it because it was SUPER broken [op] . . . but they made ME break it . . . to test if i was really willing to do anything for the federation.

page 11: tomorrow is the day that i'll officially become a part of the federation. it's my "initiation process". we'll finally going to have new information. i'm VERY anxious . . . and nervous.

page 12: i did all of this for richarlyson. i did all of this for felps. i did all of this for the ordem. i did all of this for you guys. i hope that it'll have been worth it.

page 13: explain to bad, to max and to quackity. and tell foolish that he's a gem of a person. sofia's new password is "Regret". and if those federation sons of bitches make the error of letting me live . . .

page 14: i will come back. keep your eyes open, forever.

tazercraft

page 1: gentlemen, i know that our past isn't the best one. i know that you guys must believe that i've turned into that monster again. but that man is no longer me. cell died on that island. i'm not him.

page 2: i missed you two dearly, and wanted to be able to play more rounds of hide-and-seek, and trying to organize an EGG GYMKHANA with you guys in chume labs. i'm sorry for not having been able to. i love you both, and you're amazing parents for richas, too.

page 3: he loves spending time with you both, even if the two of you are stupid*, i think that no one enternains him more than tazer and craft. at least i won't have to take the red wool again.

*used endearingly

page 4: take care of yourselves, guys. and explode this census bureau bitch. yuo guys already took down herobrine, this shitty bear is nothing.

richarlyson

page 1: richas, i tried my best. i'm sorry, son. i just wanted to get you away from this island. this place isn't safe, and the federation won't let us leave here. when i arrived in this place, i never-

page 2: thought that i would have to take care of someone . . . but what you've become was so much bigger than this. i'm sorry for not being able to be there all the time. every neuron that i burned with those cursed enigmas, all those hours that i spend locked up in that office . . .

page 3: it was all for you, richarlyson.

page 4: continue to trust in your daddies forever, pac, and mike . . . and if in any way i've managed to bring him back, in daddy felps, too. nevertheless, your dad quackity really toes love you and wants to protect you. i suspected him at the start, but i've heard the truth in your voice.

page 5: if i'm no longer here . . . daddy quackity now has my 20%, okay? i'm sorry if i've ever made you feel alone in any way. remember when i told you of a moment in my life that i felt completely alone?

page 6: solitude is worse than any prison. worse than what i went through with daddies pac and mike, and worse than this island. i'm sorry for having you suffer this, too. it's my biggest regret.

page 7: i love you, you big-headed* egg. see if you can learn to catch something that's not crabs. immortalyson forever.

*term of endearment, tends to equate to "stubbornly stupid"

bonus:

the book cellbit gave to richarlyson before being attacked by the codes

page 1: i need for[the federation] to trust me. it's the only way. i love you. i love dad forever. i need that [the players] believe the contrary. it's going to hurt, and i'm going to do terrible things. but i will-

page 2: destroy [the federation] from the inside. all of them.

additionally, he left a book for roier, however forever did not open it/read it out to respect their privacy. cellbit titled it "guapito"

[loki-zen]

re: hair loss, at what point as a man should you just shave it? I have/had long wavy Matthew McConaugh-hair, and I’m decently emotionally invested in the compliments I used to get. Outside of wanting to look good to women I don’t super care though, that and that my dad always wanted to grow his hair long but it didn’t work out for him, so I’m kinda doing it for both of us.

anyway, I’m on the road to approaching the “woody harrelson at the beginning of Natural Born Killers” hairline, and it’s a struggle. Been on finasteride for like 8 months, and I’m pretty sure it’s making me depressed, plus it does weird stuff to your cum, which is both gross and frightening in its implications. I had good results with rogaine, should probably start that again, regardless of what I do.

At what point does a man become sexier with the buzz cut a la Jason Statham, every Russian guy, etc?

it’s also frustrating because there’s so many memes out there about “creepy balding guys”, like it’s just this shorthand for being a coomer or a serial sexual harasser or what have you. I could live with “ugly balding guys”, there have been times in my life when I was hot and times I was ugly, I’m able to cope with that. But creepy just really sucks. I had a lot of female friends in college, and some women I’m very close to were victims of sexual violence, and so I’m probably hyper-sensitive and afraid of being perceived as predatory in any way. It’s good that I’m aware of the problems, but sometimes I wish I was more ignorant, it’d make it a lot less scary to strike up conversations with new people if I wasn’t crushingly aware of how often women are uncomfortable with men they’ve never met.

(I’m not morlock-Holmes, but I think we have some of the same dating issues)

So first off, it is obviously wrong and bigoted to make assumptions about someone's behaviour or intentions based on what they look like unless we're talking about something very specific and intentional like 'they have nazi tattoos'. If it helps any (I'm not sure it does) I don't think that these people necessarily see a balding guy and think that's a sexual predator so much as they are doing that very schoolyard thing of "we don't like this kind of people (sexual predators) and so we're going to stereotype them as being something we think is unattractive" (you see similar things with fatness and 'neckbeards').

If it is the women you actually know who say these sorts of things (that wasn't clear), it literally might not occur to them that they're making you feel this way because it's just a general-purpose insult to them that's become detached from the actual notion of a person they might know and like who happens to be male and balding.

This sort of talk is actually, if anything, dangerous to potential victims of sexual violence, because the idea that you can somehow spot Creepy Guys and they definitely look different to anyone else will tend to help conventionally attractive guys get away with it!

I don't think there are any hard and fast rules about the hair thing. Lots of guys do look cute with a buzzcut, and it is common (but not universal) in the dominant Anglosphere culture for people to find this more attractive than even very nice hair when that hair has visible male-pattern balding going on. I confess I do have this reaction myself sometimes, but I also find that the more I get to know people the more I see the nicer hair and the less I see the "but it's balding" part, but there are levels that will always look a bit odd to me (eg the shakespeare cut). Which, yknow, isn't actually a reason why people should change their hair, though I imagine you're asking because being attractive to other people is important to you.

Your female irl friends are perhaps best-placed to approximate the sort of views that predominate among the sort of women you're likely to be trying to date, and there are now decent AI tools to give you an idea of what you might look with different hairstyles - maybe try one out, see what you think and ask their advice.

Oh, also, in my personal opinion if your hair is fairly voluminous and past shoulder length you can get away with a receding hairline a lot longer - same with certain careful short but long on top looks, although they can be more fiddly.

[hananoami]

[ Open Orbit ] Stage 120 Clear VOD

I was previously hard stuck on this stage for quite some time; since 04/21 according to my earliest blog entry about this stage here. What originally started off as a meme attempt run turned into an actual CLEAR!! After a few attempts in the second half that is... (ᵕ—ᴗ—) Before I go in depth about my experience some notable information about this fight-- Stage 120 is the final stage that's currently available in the Deepspace Trials until the next big update in July. Like all x0 stages it requires two teams: Team 01 uses 6-Emerald memories Team 02 uses 6-Violet memories. TBH, I'm still in shock over this clear. I really didn't expect to clear it using the memories and protocores I had equipped. Literally awestruck as I'm writing this, reflecting on everything. Below are my thoughts and reflection about this wild adventure, as well as my final team set up and stat attributes.

BEFORE AND AFTER

Here's my before and after team set up for Open Orbit - Stage 120. I want to note this change was made as a meme/suggestion amongst friends during Xavier's Shimmering Moonlight limited-time banner. It was due to me getting super duper lucky with my pulls, which I will write about soon. Originally I wanted to respect the Protofield Stellactrum and match the colors for the perfect match and additional bonuses. I usually try to match the stellactrum because every bit of stats helps. However, I also want to mention that there have been instances where I opt to go off color and attempt to brute force it. For the record, this would be the most notorious one I have ever brute forced. It's not that I haven't attempted to brute force this stage before. I have. My Violet build with Rafayel was lacking in CRIT and I wasn't entirely satisfied with the protocores I rolled. So I tried to brute force it with my Zayne foreseer build, using his highest leveled memories. Usually that build carries me hard since it has a duo rank i bonus. however I still wasn't able to clear it due to lack of damage. My plan was to farm for more protocores. Specifically look for better delta cores with CRIT rate as its main stat and upgrade the ones with better substats to swap out what I currently had equipped. It's a long grind. Protocore farming is the true gacha in this game, unlike the wish pool where you're guaranteed a memory from pity. You never know what you'll get or if you'll even see what you're looking for. Well, like I mentioned earlier I got really lucky with my pulls for Xavier's banner and came out with his new myth pair at Duo Rank 3. I had cores from my SN build I could have used, but since I didn't need oath recovery anymore (duo rank ii bonus replaces having to equip that stat) I had two options to choose from-- Expedited Energy Boost or Oath Strength. So I tapped some beta cores to see what I could work with. You know, the usual trial and error testing. As luck would have it, as I was gambling my protocore upgrades I somehow managed to roll 2 Expedited Energy Boost cores with similar substats. A friend who was watching me tap away suggested that I try to brute force the fight again, but this time use my new Xavier solars/EEB protocores for the second half and use Zayne for the first half. I'm always down to try new things. So we decided to science it. Xavier's Moonlight myths is my first duo rank 3 pair. I was genuinely curious to see if it would be possible to clear open orbit - stage 120. Narrator voice: Lumiere cleared the fight with flying colors. (even if it did take him several attempts during the second half, hehe) The disrespect though lmao. It just goes to show you that there is no right or wrong way to play the game. Match the colors. Don't match the colors. You should use whatever is available to you and works best for you. Just have fun with it ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

ADDITIONAL SCREENSHOTS

Team A team set-up and stat attributes

Companion: Zayne's Foreseer Weapon: Everlasting Song ♡ Affinity Bonus: 88 When you take a fatal blow, Zayne teleports to you, blocks a hit, and counter attacks. Enemies will be knocked back. [ HP 3400 || DEF 85 || ATK 170 ] Pair Bonus [FS] - Starting Effect: increases team DMG by 8%, and reduces team DMG taken by 8%. When fighting together with Foreseer, your Active Skill DMG is increased by 25%. - Duo Rank 1: boosts Ardent Oath charge by 20%. When you and Foreseer are granted with Wards of Curses, team DMG will be increased by 12%.

5☆ Forever Sealed (sapphire/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 1 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Promise Everlasting (sapphire/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 2 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Business Trip (sapphire/lunar) Lv 80 rank 3 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Hearts Within Reach (sapphire/lunar) Lv 80 rank 1 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Cozy Afternoon (ruby/lunar) Lv 80 rank 3 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Medical Rescue (Ruby/lunar) Lv 70 using +9 SSR protocores

Team B team set-up and stat attributes

Companion: Xavier's Lumiere Weapon: Moonchaser ♡ Affinity Bonus: 93 When you take a fatal blow, Xavier teleports to you, blocks a hit, and counter attacks. Enemies will be knocked back. [ HP 3600 || DEF 90 || ATK 180 ] Pair Bonus [MN] - Starting Effect: increases team DMG by 8%, and reduces team DMG taken by 8%. The Enemy [Moonstruck] is extended by 3 seconds. - Duo Rank 1: boosts Ardent Oath charge by 20%. [Moonlight] will attach 1 stack of [Phasing Moon] to the enemy, increasing DMG dealt by 25%. - Duo Rank 2: increases Energy Charge cap by 1. When [Moonlight] is activated, the cooldown time of your Active and Resonance Skill is reduced by 0.5 seconds, and a small amount of energy charge is restored. - Duo Rank 3: increases team DMG by 8%. When your Active Skill or Charged Attack hits a target with [Moonstruck], [Moonlight] will be activated, boosting CRIT DMG by 30%.

5☆ Midnight Whispers (amber/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 3 using +9 SSR protocores

5☆ Midnight Rainfall (amber/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 3 using +9 SSR protocores

5☆ Unique Aftertaste (ruby/lunar) Lv70 rank 1 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Tender Night (amber/lunar) Lv70 rank 1 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Romantic Afternoon (emerald/lunar) Lv70 rank 1 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Fluffy Trap (emerald/lunar) Lv70 rank 1 using +9 protocores

[whumpshaped]

I have been reading whump since this year started and I have a lot of inspiration to start writing too, but I'm not that good at writing plus english is not my first language, I'm afraid I won't be able to find the correct words

Do you have any advice for me?

okay i was in your exact position 5 years ago and here's what i think

just start. i was incredibly nervous when i started posting but it turned out fine and i'm still alive. nobody was mean to me, nobody ever said "oh hey i see you made a mistake there, i bet you're not a native speaker OR a real writer". in fact, turns out a LOT of us are not native speakers! so just start. it will be ok :)

write stuff you enjoy and tag appropriately. don't try to hop on what's popular, just write whatever you're into, and your writing will find your audience

try to trigger warn as best as you can but know the responsibility to click away when something is triggering lies with the reader. if you get a mean anon about posting something super whumpy that you tagged thoroughly, that they refused to click away from, and they demand you never post whumpy stuff again, just delete and move on

in general... if you get hate, delete and move on

when i first started, i was so afraid of everyone that i just posted my own writing and never interacted. i wish i have! reblog stuff! leave tags! send asks on or off anon! 99% of people here are very kind and will be very appreciative of that, and you might make awesome friends

writing advice posts are more so suggestions than Rules, but they can be very helpful

thesaurus is your best friend, and don't worry, it's not "cheating", native speakers use it too. (was that only my worry? maybe so. but i'm including it anyway.)

likewise if you have to translate a word... well so what? that doesn't mean you're not writing banger stories

you don't have to post perfect chapters with full worldbuilding every day. you can post snippets. you can post nameless drabbles. you can post a 2 sentence incoherent prompt. you can post whatever you want, it's your blog and you make the rules, so don't make ones that suffocate you and make you miserable :)

pet whump usually takes off and gets lots of notes, nameless drabbles usually get more notes than big oc stories because they require less commitment, and prompts and memes you spent 2 seconds on will take off and get more notes than any of your other posts. that's just how it is. try not to get discouraged about this. i know we all post for validation at the end of the day and there's nothing wrong with that, but try to remember that number of notes ≠ quality of your writing

read as much as you can! it helps build vocabulary and you'll pick up phrases and stuff that you can then use in your own writing!

JUST WRITE. i was a much worse writer 5 years ago than i am now. inevitably as you write more and improve you will look back and think "holy shit, i thought THIS was appropriate to post?? i spent 5 hours proofreading this and i wrote terryfying???" but that just means you came a long way and now you write better stories :)

just try to have fun :) make an intro post, tag it with #whump community or #whump intro, and you'll already have 10 friends. and just post whatever makes your heart sing! i believe in u!

[killian-whump]

KW Does Shit So You Don't Have To

I know there's a lot of arguments and debates about AI generated art and how horrible it is, both for the artists it rampantly steals from and in the quality of art produced.

But, you know... I'm a curious person.

So I went and plugged Colin's name into a bunch of these things just to see what would happen and... absolutely nothing worthwhile happened. I mean, stuff happened... and you can hit the Keep Reading link to hear about it, but... I dunno, man.

These things have no clue what Colin actually looks like. It's bizarre. None of them got him right, yet they ALL seemed to get him... equally wrong? Like, there's some guy out there that AI thinks is Colin, but isn't actually Colin at all, and he looks about like this:

They did no better with Killian Jones, Colin O'Donoghue as Killian Jones or even Colin O'Donoghue as Killian Jones from Once Upon a Time. In fact, at that point, I was pretty much just throwing words at them that they were entirely ignoring.

Admittedly, one of the sites (Craiyon) actually got relatively close to Colin's appearance, but they also looked like they weren't making art so much as cutting and pasting his face onto art and blurring the edges. That, and they seem to think he has glowing blue laser eyes for some reason, and I swear I didn't tell them that but I kinda wish I had, because that would be a fun rumor to start. Anyway, this is the best approximation of Colin I was able to create on that site, using "Colin O'Donoghue as Killian Jones from Once Upon a Time" as the prompt:

I mean, that's not... THAT bad. But it sure as shit isn't about to take the place of fanart any time soon. And, mind you, this was the BEST of the bunch. The rest were... Well, here's a less-good example with the laser eyes in full effect:

Apparently, Once Upon a Time is now Game of Thrones and Killian Jones is Baelish and Colin has blue laser eyes pew pew pew. Again, the face is kinda spot-on, but I feel like that's because they just copy/pasted his actual face in there. Even the image quality and color depth differs on the face versus the rest of the "art". They just literally stuck his face in some art template and gave him laser eyes.

Mind you, my side piece (Tom Payne) fared no better. They seem to have him confused with that kid who played the elf-like boy in... Game of Thrones. Actually, I feel like all of these things are stuck in some kind of Game of Thrones time warp where that's all that exists and everything they don't understand must surely come from that... and there is very, very little they DO understand.

Now as a litmus test of sorts, I stuck Keanu Reeves' name in some of them, as well, and they did all seem to know what he looks like - so if you're looking to play with the face of some uber famous celebs, this might be fun for you to play with. But anybody with fewer than 5 mainstream memes devoted to them probably just makes the AI go, "Who? Must be someone from Game of Thrones."

Which makes it completely useless for those of us gathered here, even aside from the obvious ethical quandaries of art theft and the devaluing of human-made artwork.

As a final test, I asked Craiyon to show me "Colin O'Donoghue as James Bond" and it basically returned the exact same results as the Killian Jones prompt did. Though it did hilariously encourage me to try, "handsome scottish actor colin o'donoghue dressed in a tuxedo and carrying a gun as he attends a james bond movie" which is definitely not what I was looking for, but bonus points for creativity, I guess? Also, carrying guns in movie theaters is bad form and super illegal, even if it is a James Bond film, but I guess AI doesn't know that. And Colin isn't Scottish.

But he does have laser eyes. This is a rumor I'm starting right here in this post on this blog. Laser eyes. He's got 'em.

[oleander-nin]

hi again! i'm back :D i hope you had a great day and i'm sending this kinda late so i don't think you'll respond until tmr so i hope you have a great night as well :) you're very cool!!

since the topic of yandere turtles is back, i wanted to add my thoughts as well >:) i personally like characterizing things like this with songs or getting ideas from songs bc it helps my flow and i was listening to "Velvet Ring" by Big Thief and i thought that it could suit the yandere turtles plus their darling a bit:

"love is a gentle thing" — like what the turtles would want from their darling, platonic or not, they js want their darling and stuff and most of the time, i'm pretty sure they don't see what they're doing is wrong so i would imagine they see all their actions as necessary and all their affections as gentle and nurturing and why is darling trying to push them away? ah, they must be having a bad day, guess the turtles gotta love them harder! while "yours is thicker than a velvet ring" — as opposed to the turtle's delusions, i would imagine this part as what the darling goes through. like every touch, act, and word that comes from the turtles is js the nightmare continuing :(

and to the SS cake anon, i loved their thoughts on how the turtles would "break" for their darling and turn all crazy if they didn't start off like that! mikey is also a hard turtle for me to characterize and i dont know why. the best way i could describe him as a yandere is the "my precious, my precious" meme from lord of the rings; aka wanting darling for himself and no one else. also the fact that he's the youngest so hes usually the one being taken care of despite the fact that he is capable of taking care of himself so i think if he were to break for his darling, it'd have to do something with the fact that he has someone he can take care of now! someone he can dote on and adore instead of not being taken seriously enough to go on his own mission, y'know? i don't think he'd be as overbearing as yandere raph but i think something like that would at least be present. or going back to the fact that he's the youngest and raph didnt want him to go on a mission for the longest time bc he thought he couldnt handle it, maybe just the fact that he's not seen as "weak" (as weak as a war machine mutant box turtle can be). the fact that darling doesn't see that in him probably makes him want to chase that and keep it for himself snd keep darling for himself— idk its hard to do yandere mikey D: sorry i rambled on so much!!

let me stop myself before i talk too much, sorry again for the long message!! i hope you and the rest of your lovely anons and 8 bit too have a great rest of your day and night!

-💤 anon

Sorry for the late response! I was busy today fnjkanvkfda

I love your whole analysis on this. I've never been one to be able to connect songs to things, but I'm very glad you're able to and you shared it with me. I love the way you see it and completely agree, 10/10

"the best way i could describe him as a yandere is the "my precious, my precious" meme from lord of the rings" - Real. Mikey is so hard for me, because I can't decide how I want to portray him lol.

very much agree with your Mikey analysis, love it very much I'm frothing at the mouth fdnakjvnfkjadndkjna;k

Thank you sm for the ask, I love seeing y'all's thoughts on the yan turtles! It's super fun lol. Sorry again for the late answer, I hope you had a great day/night and stay safe sleepy!

[liquidluckandstuff]

In the Snape character meme ask thing you said Hogwarts has really gone to the dogs, and that you have opinions about it👀👀

Can you elaborate on it pls? I'm really curious👀👀👀👀

This is coming from a real world place not a fantasy place. As in "If a school like Hogwarts really existed."

First off, there are a lot of teachers like Professor McGonagall or Flitwick who are very very good at their jobs. Great. Fantastic.

But then you have teachers like Hagrid or Trelawney or even Snape who very clearly know their craft, but are absolute shit at teaching it.

This is why I HATE it when people think "Oh if you can't do, teach" because they think it's easy. It's very clearly NOT.

You have Hagrid whose heart is in the right place, and who knows what kind of experience, teaching all these kids about magical animals. There is no denying he loves what he does, and for some animals is very experienced but why does he keep teaching about the same animal all year? Skrewts, unicorns, nifflers and thats all we really hear about.

A lot of those are because he HAD to to get Umbridge off his back. Part of being a teacher is keeping student interest and doing the same thing over and over again makes them bored. They were very CLEARLY bored in his class and they themselves didn't think he was a very good teacher.

So now you have this man teaching them about something he clearly doesn't know much about, or at least HOW to teach it and these kids have to take these super important tests that could determine their fates in the wizarding world?

Hagrid clearly doesn't understand the pressure they are under because he never took a test like that himself.

Then, you have Trelawney who kind of just skirts on by with her lessons. These students are clearly faking their understanding and getting away with it for a number of reasons.

But mainly its because she doesn't know how to follow up with her teachings. She teaches it, has them do it, and then her corrections don't have any solid structure other than "Well you don't have the inner eye" which basically can translate to in the real world "You didn't get it the way I taught it the first time there must be something wrong with YOU not with the way I taught."

Honestly, part of me liked that umbridge had her leave the school. She herself could not provide one shred proof that she could do the things she claimed. Because if she WAS a good teacher, her students would have been able to put into practice the things she taught.

(I mean fuck umbridge but we are comparing to good teaching practices here. She "teaches", most of the students cannot do what she taught unless they have a natural talent, therefore she isn't really a good teacher) Sure those kids love her, but love doesn't help them pass those O.W.Ls

And finally Snape.

He is a MASTER at his craft. A POWERFUL wizard.

and he HATES children. Start there and how on earth does that make him a good teacher? He has the same problem that Trelawney has. Teach it and expect them to get it but if they don't they are idiots? And this dude actually insults them.

The environment he created is already working against him. Students do NOT learn well in an environment where they do not feel comfortable in and how are these kids supposed to be comfortable with a man who will insult them for anything?

He is literally just there because Dumbledore wants him there. Then, when does he actually offer remedial potions to anyone other than Harry? and even then it isn't real? Who would WANT to go to remedial potions with him when they aren't comfortable with it?

I would take that failing grade and a howler from my mom if it meant i didn't have to spend any more time with him.

So you have this unwelcoming environment with a man who is LOOKING to insult you (if you aren't in Slytherin but even then you might not be safe) and you better get his lesson down right the first time because otherwise there will be hell to pay.

The students who do learn do it out of fear, or get help from an outside source (like Hermione). And while I do love it when people work together like that it should NOT be how they are learning the content. That gets me PISSED.

That is horrible teaching because what is the POINT of a teacher being in a classroom at that point if the students are the ones doing all that work constantly? He isn't even monitoring them very well if that's all he is there for.

Sure there are classes where they do that but like.. that is the point of that class. There is also a lot of freedom in those sorts of classes to learn what you want to learn. But those kids? With all that pressure and having to do that for so long?

No no. It's not Snape that is a good teacher, those kids who do work hard and make those good grades on their O.W.Ls that is ALL on them. ALL their hard work and dedication. Snape just bullied them into it and sat back and got to take the credit.

Anyway. I really really hate a lot of the teaching styles at Hogwarts.

[mrhowells]

Smallville 4x02 *chanting* clois clois clois cloisss

Why are they psychoanalyzing each other already lmaoooo

that's some quality yeeting😌

First of all, MOTHER. Second, imagine being able to pull off that orange jacket, I could never

"Lois!!😳😨" The queen doing queen shit while Clark is just standing there clutching his pearls, THEE DYNAMIC

Why is her dad so extra tho💀

I'm having so much fun right nowwww🤗 Have I mentioned that I love Lois? Because I love her a lot

Clark being super upfront with his parents never stops warming my heart🥹

name a more entertaining duo I'll wait

both Lana and Clark seem quite different from season 3, it's almost jarring

PLSSS imagine if he was wrong💀💀

Women supporting women, we love to see it😌

an understatement if I've ever heard one💀

"The awkward tension is just getting started." Lois I love you

I'm memeing the hell out of this episode just so you know

"I can see why you're in love with her." *the bisexual Lois agenda*

Clark: "Look you're really not the person I wanna talk to about this."

Clark, 5 seconds later: "So here's what happened-"

she looks so pretty here it's insane actually

"To keep an eye on me, is that it, boss?" ugh the way she says that is so hot don't ask me why

"My heart isn't exactly what it used to be." They keep reminding me and I hate it😭😭

Clark is having some unpleasant flashbacks right now🤡

watching Lionel get stabbed like whatever, he'll survive🤷🏻‍♀️ Anyway, back to what I was saying-

askajskajsak the old geezer💀😭

the love of my life everyone

"I don't know how you ever survived without me." I feel like she's saying that to me but also YES, Lois saving Clark since day one👏👏 (flash forward to Loisidiedwhenyouleft he literally CANNOT survive without her I'm-)

bless🥹

He's like gimme credit I did good work too Lois acknowledge meeee🥺

Chloe's like can y'all stop making prolonged eye contact I almost got murdered and I wanna go home👀

🙏🕯Manifesting Lionel in prison and out of commission for as many episodes as possible🕯🙏

Jonathan defending Lex while Clark won't have it? Oh, how the turntables...

"It's funny isn't it? After everything we've been through, I thought it would take us longer to get over it." OOUCH

"Us?" He's like in what universe-

"Yeah, you and Lois."

"Lois? She's bossy. She's stuck up, she's rude. I can't stand her."

Clark Kent, you beautiful beautiful clown🤡 Look at the face this mf made when he said the first part, "she's bossy😍😏😍"

"Do you believe in destiny?" "I don't want to."

yeaaah he really doesn't😬

The more Lex emotionally controls the situation when he's with Lionel, the less threatening Lionel is. Really makes you realize that he only has as much power as Lex allows him to have, if Lex stops caring (which I don't think he ever fully will but I digress), Lionel becomes irrelevant. Even if he still managed to outsmart Lex in whatever way, as long as Lex just shrugs it off like "Whatever old man, smart move I guess." any victory on Lionel's end really loses its impact🤷🏻‍♀️

I still want to know how old Jason is btw👀

[dazais-guardian-angel]

🧡💛💖💕 for the Ask meme! (Tales of the Abyss ;))

🧡: What is a popular (serious) theory you disagree with?

Lmao well..... I think you saw my previous ask 😂😭 Any theory that says Asch or Lorelei or some weird Luke-Asch personality hybrid or anyone else people come up with that isn't just Luke who comes back at the end. It's gotta be Luke; the narrative just falls apart if it isn't. The other day when I was answering the previous ask looking for your "theory" post again I saw the take (put very simply here) that Abyss is a tragedy, Luke's character is a tragic one, so it makes sense that he ultimately dies and stays dead, and I'm just like.... how?? Genuinely I don't understand how his character arc can possibly be read as that his entire struggle to change and for life was just completely futile in the end and that there was no meaning to any of it all, that's such a downer ending for what is ultimately, despite how much sad shit happens in it, a hopeful story 😭😭😭 (one of the main themes is LITERALLY CALLED MEANING OF BIRTH).

Even putting that aside though, I just feel like it makes even less sense for Asch to come back?? Like, his character arc finished when he died. The whole point is that he remained stagnant the whole game and his tragedy is that he dies that way, while Luke was willing and able to change!! What purpose would it serve narratively to bring him back after his very sad yet satisfying conclusion?? Again, by all means, it makes for juicy AUs, but as canon.... there's no way.

💛: What is a popular ship you just can’t get behind, and why?

....I feel like I'm putting myself in danger answering this when it's coming from you 😂😭 But, well, I'm really not that interested in Luke/Tear lol. By no means do I hate it though, I just don't have any strong feelings towards it either way, and honestly part of that is just because I'm not really a shipper in general lol and nothing to do with them specifically. A lot of people who don't ship it say it's because they see Tear as more of a sister figure to Luke because that's how the game initially presents her as (and with the "big sister" title or whatever it's called), but idk... I honestly can't decide what I see her as to him. They just feel like very close friends to me by the end of the game, I guess, and although I like some of their touching scenes, I never really felt the chemistry between them. I guess it's just hard for me to imagine Luke in a relationship with everything he's going through during the game, and also Tear is pretty bland to me herself so that doesn't help. 😭 I know her Japanese voice is very different from her English one and her English one gets some flak, so maybe that's to blame ugh; maybe if I listened to her in Japanese sometime I would become more endeared to her.

💖: What is your biggest unpopular opinion about the series?

...If I had to pick another one that isn't just the first answer again lol, though this isn't exactly super unpopular, but Abyss is the best game in the Tales series, by a wide, wide margin. Not only do I believe it to be the best Tales game, but one of the best games of all time period, and one of the best stories of all time. Yes, I said what I said, fight me. And it has absolutely nothing to do with nostalgia; I played Abyss on my 3DS around 2014-2015, probably? in my early 20s, so I don't have any special childhood memories of it, nor was it even my first Tales game (Graces holds a special place in my heart for that). I just... played it, and it left such an incredible impact on me that has yet to be beaten by nearly any other media I've ever experienced. I don't know what it is about it that makes it so powerful, but it's true. Don't get me wrong, plenty of other stories have come very close to making me feel the same way..... but none of them have ever quite reached Abyss level.

So yeah, a lot of people agree Abyss is good.... but I still believe that most don't recognize it for the masterpiece it truly is.

💕: What is an unpopular ship that you like?

Like I said, I'm really not a shipper lol, but I'm really fond of Guy/Natalia? I just love their scenes together, how respectful and gentlemanly he is towards her, and how her growth is most strongly shown in plenty of her interactions with him; it's so lovely to see. 🥹 and I think about their time spent together post-Eldrant and before the epilogue, them helping each other grieve.... it destroys me so good :' ) they're very sweet together.

Thank youuu sista! 🩷

Ask game

[not-poignant]

@hellish-cleric replied to your post “I think it will come as no surprise to anyone that...”:

Yeah, everyone in my party, plus most of the players in my d&d group *hated* Astarion as soon as they met him. Meanwhile, I'm Team Ride or Die for Astarion. I'm a little confused at all the hate he gets.

​Oh actually I can answer at least some of this!

He's an obviously camp character who was in a gay relationship (a forced gay relationship but w/e) in an AAA game that is mostly going out to dudebros, and frankly the people who overwhelmingly hate him or kill him immediately the most are straight guys. (The biggest complaints for BG3 are not actually the bugs, but the LGBTQIA+ rep, including being able to have a nonbinary character, or trans character). Within that context, there was already latent Astarion hate in the community that was easy for everyone else to pick up on. So some of it is honestly straight up homophobia!

Then on top of that they gave him PTSD over being saved by someone who then tortured him for 200 years and enslaved him in exchange for that rescue, so he reacts badly every time you save someone, because he doesn't trust that.

And then on top of that he's a complete chaos gremlin. After all, he was tortured and forced to torture people for 200 years, and just about no one maintains much of an ethical backbone after that kind of treatment.

And I think the combo of 'so much of the (guy) community hates Astarion so there's already a background vibe that predisposes people to being suspicious of him' and 'he's camp which hooks into the homophobic folks who don't like that' AND 'he keeps disapproving of me when I do heroic things' (which is a lie, he doesn't always disapprove, and sometimes he actually approves, it depends a lot on context) just kind of turns a lot of folks off him.

He's the only character in the whole story who will actually take you aside privately and comfort you if you do a sexual thing with an NPC later in the game and choose dialogue options that say you were disgusted by doing the thing. He literally takes you aside and starts joking and then is like 'actually... I know what that's like, and I'm so so sorry you had to go through that.'

Dude's fun to meme, hilarious to meme, but he's also the only character who comforts you after you get sexually assaulted/harassed, and in an extremely genuine, 'no strings attached' way. I'm ride or die for that fucker, and I laugh at the folks that turfed him because a bunch of dudes laid a path they walked down.

Like don't get me wrong, some folks just hate him because of the way he looks, the constant disapproval if you're playing a Very Good Character is frustrating, or they have no use for a rogue (they hate loot or maybe they're playing a rogue themselves), or because he can be naff in a battle if you spec him badly / don't know how to spec him out, or for a lot of super understandable reasons! Like, if you never talk your way out of situations, hulk smash a lot in battles, and save people, you're going to get his disapproval AND he won't be as useful in those battles. If you don't sneak around picking off folks, and just go in and smash everyone, he's not as useful as Gale and Wyll who have good AoE, or Lae'zel and Karlach who have amazing 'Hulk Smash' abilities.

I'd avoid him too if I was playing a character who couldn't persuade/deceive/intimidate my way out of situations (which is the best and easiest way to earn his approval), and I might be like 'I don't like Astarion' because of it. He doesn't fit my playstyle! I can't stand Lae'zel for example, because I just don't vibe with 'killing the weak and no one is equal' as a political stance!

But some of it re: Astarion is literally 'a lot of folks are implicitly homophobic and he's easy to hate.'

Frankly I think Dorian (from Dragon Age: Inquisition) would have received a lot more of this too if he'd been more morally questionable as a character when you first meet him. But they made him a 'good' queer so he got more conditional acceptance (and even then, he still got a lot of hate initially!!!)

I am very fortunate that everyone I know personally absolutely love him, and I'm surrounded by a lot of Ride or Die Astarion fans in my personal circle/s both offline and irl and that makes me so incredibly happy.

[marvelmyriad]

markiplier Resident Evil: Village quotes as ask memes - PART 2:

well that was a wasted bullet, sorry

that was probably a mistake, i don't care though, whatever

this is where my adhd is really going to come in handy

all right come here you bastards, i know how to block now

oh, get stabbed

you're gonna get a face full of stab if you keep that up

i'm gonna use that the shotgun

you think i can't kill you with a knife, i can.  i'm probably going to have to

good thing he doesn't pull out his machete that would really be an advantage for him

unfortunately for him my arms are super sturdy

can i block with a gun? i can, okay. hey bud!

that's dope as hell, is there vodka in it?

i was in stealth mode, how dare you?

i want to save my gunpowder because i'm insane

maybe you should have locked it

you all right?  you need a knife to plug up that wound?

if it's just the one of you i shall stab thee, if it's two i am going to run away

oh i didn't think there were so many of you

okay watch this, you want to see something sick?  watch this watch this, watch this sickness

am i supposed to be able to shoot all these guys?  because i'm about to run out of bullets

you're gonna pay for that one in dividends

well money has value depending on who you ask otherwise it might just be rocks

okay so i something tells me i'm probably not supposed to try to kill all these dudes

hold on i gotta get more bullets

well that's good for me and bad for you

oh well good thing i killed all those dudes because otherwise they would have absolutely murdered you both, but i'm a hero

why is there chem fluid in the bathroom?

seems like you actually know how to lock things

yeah, you get far in life like that

look, i'm doing all the work here, if you want to sit in the house

there's so much blood, oh god

oh, maybe step out of the way of the gun

okay cool, just wanted to type out my life story real quick

don't mind if i look at all your things do you?  all right here i go, um ah, very interesting…

i wonder if this is all the places where there's like, secret stuff

who's talking to me?

you should put your faith in someone taller someone more uh, robust, powerful-powerful is really the word that we're all thinking of

whatever dude, you want to go outside?

uh okay sounds really convincing

that was a spell just to get the tea going

I have a gun, i ha- i have a gun, i have a gun, i got a gun

that voice sounded familiar

well uh you didn't do enough of the right thing

okay well that's fine this entire place is collapsing yeah, well, we'll be safe in here

no we're getting out of here together you and me, bestie, we're besties now, come on

yeah you know i gotta go, everything's on fire

but how about that cup of tea?

all right well i'm leaving and you can stay if you want i guess

what the hell do i do? am i stupid?

the answer is no, but also you guys probably got a wrong answer because you're stupid and said yes, so really who's this stupid one?  might be you

let's move, come on bestie, we got this.

let's go and try not to breathe in the smoke

uh oh i shouldn't have said something like that because that guarantees death

yep here's the guaranteed death

well that seemed unnecessarily dramatic.  if only you were nine feet tall, you could have reached me

i get that that one was very tragic but there was everything she could have done to prevent her doom

i feel like she would be screaming in agony from the fire burning

if only she knew about what a window was

good god i smacked my wound hand

i know i should feel like more remorseful but to be perfectly honest, that was a bit ridiculous

it's my fault for saying the magic words that gets people killed

oh hey, old bag of rats

all right man that was a toughie

nothing but blood and death

apparently i'm just i'm a badass

that wasn't cold at all, i'm fine

just taking a little soak, cleaning myself off, i want to be respectable and presentable

hey what's up? oh didn't think anyone was left, you must be pretty tough, huh?

you're not local, even better

oh i'm sorry, the metal spike in my chest is a little whine-inducing

i'm used to this, i run for my life like, a lot

oh wow this is just cruel

hey thanks for the money and the ammo

you didn't even take my gun, you amateur

do they not have cameras here? probably not, they only got an extremely intricate system of spinning blades why would they have cameras anyway?

extra baggage, okay, emotional or otherwise

shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up

all right, i got a dope ass gun

yeah, i'm sure that was nothing

oh, i'm just gonna let you do that apparently

how many horrific stab wounds have i sustained?

ow, that's my wound hand

this is not a sexual thing, it's about power right?