#it is so late i can't believe how much effort I put into this

[morbid248]

i finally had the time to make biblically accurate tumblr lester and friends. he almost looks like a person now

i think i now understand victor frankenstein very well

[wintrwinchestr]

an overture of indulgence (joel miller x f!reader oneshot) 18+

summary: it's been a long time since you've seen joel, and some things have changed, but a lot has stayed the same. namely, how quickly he can still get you on his knees for him, ready to show him exactly just how much you like what has changed about him.

warnings: 18+, smut, post-outbreak, jackson joel, d/s relationship dynamics, pet names (baby, babygirl, sweetheart, sweet girl, etc), body worship, belly kink, talk of weight gain, belly riding, m/f masturbation, lil bit of humiliation kink, lil bit of edging, reader is an adult but age otherwise unspecified, reader is shorter than joel and has hair long enough to grab, let me know if i missed anything :)

word count: 4.3k

a/n: just fuckin outing myself left and right these days huh. idk what came over me with this one. started this late last night and here it is now. belly enjoyers rise!!!!!!! nice comments/reblogs appreciated if you enjoyed <3 you can't kink shame me bc i like getting bullied so now what. also i avoided daddy kink for once in my life please clap. i know i’m spoiling y’all this weekend don’t get used to it.

divider by @saradika

“...Joel?!” you shout, your leisurely walking pace quickly turning into a hurried jog as you leave Tommy behind, making a beeline toward the man you would swear on your life is Joel Miller. A small handful of years ago now, he was kind of your boyfriend, kind of not, kind of something else more complicated and unlabeled, because who can afford to put a label on anything in times like these?

Joel’s head turns in your direction at the sound of his name, and as soon as you spot that crooked scar across the bridge of his nose, you’re certain it’s him.

“Holy shit, I can’t believe it,” you half-cry, throwing your weight into him as you wrap him in a tight embrace. He’s much taller than you, but you still managed to knock him off his balance a little. He envelops your whole body in one of his signature, all-encompassing hugs, and it’s like no time has passed at all.

The two of you had ended whatever it was you had on good terms, no hard feelings or animosity shared between you. It was just hard to maintain any kind of relationship in a world like this, and trying to nurture romance in the Boston QZ was much like trying to grow a rose garden in toxic, radioactive soil. You can put as much care and effort and something like love into it as you have in you, but the circumstances will just never allow it to reach its full potential. The end of your “relationship” was mutual, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. Especially when he had disappeared one day without so much as saying goodbye.

When you had stumbled upon Tommy and a group of patrollers in the snowy forest outside Jackson just earlier today, you were alone, tired, and losing hope that this rumored safe haven even existed at all. You had heard crackles through the radio in the QZ about the community, and even though it sounded too good to be true, what else did you have to lose anymore? After months of travel and survival and pain and hunger, you’d never been so happy to meet a bunch of strangers in the woods in your whole life. You didn’t hesitate to get on the back of Tommy’s horse, and let him lead you to the sanctuary they spoke of.

As he was giving you a tour, proudly showing off their electricity, running water, fresh food, and clean houses, you had started to look forward to what the future may bring, for the first time in a long time. You could never have imagined you’d ever run into Joel again, that this is where he had ended up, of all places. And now here the both of you are, bodies pressed as tightly together as possible, breathing in each other’s familiar scents and never wanting to let go again.

Joel is the first to break the embrace, grasping your head in his large hands and frantically searching your face for any sign that he could be dreaming, that fate hasn’t really brought you back together again after all.

“Jesus Christ, it’s really you,” he breathes, and you swear his voice breaks just a little bit as he presses his lips to your forehead, closing his eyes as he does.

When he blinks them open again, he meets Tommy’s gaze, who’s standing quietly a few yards back from where you’re having your sentimental reunion. Tommy gives an understanding nod, and gestures that he’ll be waiting inside the community’s dining hall, gathering that whatever this is happening between his brother and some girl he only just met, he shouldn’t interrupt. Joel is grateful for many things today, one of them being the rekindled bond he has with Tommy, the other being how you somehow miraculously found your way back to him.

Small groups of other Jackson residents follow Tommy into the dining hall shortly afterward, and as the sun begins to set behind the mountains, Joel realizes it must be about time for dinner to be served.

He detaches his lips from your forehead, brushing some of your hair away from your face as he takes you in again. “You poor thing, must be starvin’ I bet,” he wonders aloud, giving you a sympathetic look.

“Kinda always am, just as a rule, but yeah,” you reply, trying to make light of your situation. Though, Joel doesn’t seem to find the humor in it the way you do.

“Long as you stay here, ain’t ever gotta worry about that again, that’s for damn sure.” He runs his tongue across his lips as he finishes his sentence, already knowing that whatever meal they’re serving tonight, it’ll be some of the most delicious food he’s had in a long time. He suspects you’ll feel much the same. “C’mon, let’s get you inside. Get you warm and fed for once in your life.”

–

Your heart, your stomach, your soul, all feel full as you relax into the comfortable couch in the living room of Joel’s cozy home. He wouldn’t even entertain the idea of you staying in an empty house all by yourself tonight, insisting that if you’d like some company while you settle in, you were more than welcome to his. He had let you spend as long as you wanted to in his shower, and he didn’t mind if there was hardly any warm water left by the time you were done. He sure as hell wasn’t paying the bill, and you deserved to feel truly clean. He can remember clear as day how he felt after his first Jackson shower, like he had stripped off a layer of grime he hadn’t been able to scrub all the way clean in twenty years. He had gone to Maria to get you some clothes and underwear while you were bathing, and set them silently on the sink counter for you to put on whenever you were done.

And now here you sit, feeling full and clean and satisfied and comfortable and safe, watching Joel stoke the logs in his fireplace as it casts the whole room in a honey orange glow. You take a moment to admire him while he isn’t looking, and even in the dim and flickering lighting, you can see he’s just as handsome as he was the last time you saw him. He looks older, with more gray in his longer hair and meat on his bones, the latter trait likely due to years worth of the hearty cooking you both indulged in tonight. He looks… good like this.

“It really is nice to see you again, you know. You look…” you start, not being able to help the way your eyes wander to his soft lower belly, the way it pushes taut against his tucked-in flannel shirt and just barely spills over the edge of his jeans.

He turns his head away from the fire to face you. You’re not very subtle in your staring, and he knows what you’re referring to right away. He huffs a light chuckle, trying to brush off the way he thinks you’re poking fun at him.

“I know, I know,” he acknowledges, placing a hand on his stomach. “Been tryin’ to get Maria to give me some more patrol shifts, see if I can get some of the weight off. But hey, you try havin’ three square meals a day for the first time in twenty some odd years, see what it does to you, huh?” He pivots his attention back to the fireplace, and he seems to turn his body further away from you on purpose, so that you can’t see the round profile of his tummy as much.

“No! No, it, um… It suits you. I was gonna say you look good, actually.” You’re quick in your reply, trying to make it clear that you didn’t mean to offend him, without letting too much on. 

He scoffs. “C’mon, you don’t gotta flatter me, sweetheart. I know I don’t exactly look the way you remember–”

“Joel, will you stop?” you interrupt, your voice laced with exasperation. “I’m being serious. Do I look like I’m making fun of you?”

He cranes his neck to look back at where you’re perched on the couch, and gives you a once over. “Guess not… Look a lil’ like somethin’ else, though, if I'm bein’ honest,” he says with a teasing smirk. And there he is again, the same quick-witted Joel you remember from back in the QZ.

You choose to engage in his banter, just to see where he’s going with it. “Oh yeah? And what’s that?”

He shrugs, beginning to mindlessly poke at the firewood again. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you look like you might like it.”

He’s just kidding around with you, trying to rile you up, you’re sure. But when he gets silence in return instead of the sound of you jumping to defend yourself with another playful jab, he turns to face you once more, and is met with your stunned expression. 

“Oh…” Joel looks down at himself, then back to you again, just in time to catch your eyes flitting from his middle back up to his face. “What, you like ‘em big, sweetheart? ‘S that it?”

The truth is, you do, you always have. It was never a requirement, of course, as the guys you’d been with before Joel all had varying body types. But you’d be lying to yourself if you said that your eyes didn’t linger just a bit longer on guys with a little more to them, with wider arms and thicker legs and a softer middle. You’ve never admitted your preference to anyone before, and Joel calling you out on it now has your face running hot, skin feeling prickly as he sees through you like you’re made of glass.

“I-I don’t– I mean, I do, kinda, but not like that… Well, it is like that, I just mean–” You stumble over yourself, fearing you’ve revealed too much, wishing you could rewind the conversation and just tell him it was nice to see him again, plain and simple.

Joel lays the fire poker down on the granite ledge of the fireplace, approaching where you’re sitting and cupping the side of your face with his calloused hand. 

“Sh, sh, stop, baby. ‘S alright if you do, nothin’ to be ashamed of,” he comforts, and it takes all the willpower you have left not to let your eyes drift down to his stomach, so close you could kiss it, if he’d let you.

“It’s just… I missed you. I thought about you all the time, wondered what ever happened to you after you left. Didn’t even know if you were alive until today. I’m just happy to see you… doing so well. To see that you’re healthy, and everything.” You swallow hard, hoping you sound convincing enough that he’ll let this go, forget all about your little admission just now. But of course, Joel is as stubborn as he’s ever been, and he doesn’t plan on releasing you from his trap now that you’re ensnared in it. 

“That’s sweet, baby, ‘s real sweet,” Joel says, softly, stroking his thumb across your cheekbone as he speaks. “Thought about you too, all this time. Practically every day…” He rakes his eyes over you, noticing the way his touch has you starting to melt already, how you’re looking up at him with your wide, needy eyes. “Why don’t you show me just how much you missed me, hm? How much you love seein’ me healthy, as you put it.”

You’re stunned into silence once again, jaw slack and pupils wide as you search his gaze for proof that he’s just messing with you, making fun of you just to watch you squirm. But you don’t find any.

“O-okay,” you agree in a half-whisper.

Joel smiles down at you, satisfied. “All these years later, still just the sweetest thing, ain’t you? You still just as obedient, too?”

You nod without even thinking, words catching up with your instinctual response a second later. “Mhm, yeah, I am…” You had forgotten how easy it is to submit to him, how good it feels to let the hypnotizing tone of his voice carry you somewhere far away from yourself, when you need it the most. Whether it was after a shitty day of working for shittier rations in the QZ, or after a harsh trek in harsher weather to a forested oasis, Joel always knows how to make you feel like submission is your most natural state. 

“Good… Kneel for me please, sweetheart,” he commands, and you obey immediately, his hand slipping from your face as you slide from the couch onto the woven carpet beneath you. Like second nature, your hands automatically fold themselves on your lap, remembering how you were never to touch Joel until he permitted you to. He takes note of this, and praises you accordingly. “Look at that, didn’t even have to ask. Such a good girl.”

He’s so enamored with you, he almost forgets where he was going with this until he watches your eyes flash to the growing bulge in his jeans, then back up to him. “Not tonight, sweetheart. Was thinkin’ you could put that pretty mouth to use on somethin’ different this time, hm?”

You knit your brows together, not sure what he means, but he doesn’t let you wonder for long. Slowly, he starts to unbutton his flannel shirt, starting at the top and working his way down. He tosses it onto the ground, then pulls his undershirt off over his head, adding it to the other discarded clothing. Without the confines of his slightly-too-tight button-up, you can see how much he really has filled out. Everything about his upper body is just a little more plush, with petal pink stretch marks adorning the soft skin in various places. You want to make it your personal mission to kiss each and every one of them, commit their exact coordinates on his body to memory.

There's a deep scar, you notice, to the left of his belly button, that has almost successfully disguised itself as one of those pretty marks. It’s definitely new since you saw him last, and it looks like it hurt, especially with the evidence of how crudely it had been stitched back together.

“What happened?” you wonder aloud, worried eyes glued to the healed injury.

He has to peer over the curve of his belly to see what you’re looking at. “Long story. Happened on my way out here, after I left Boston. Nothin’ for you to worry about, sweet girl, hardly even hurt. Forget it’s even there, most of the time,” he answers, still with a dominant edge to his voice that does a mostly good job of convincing you it’s the truth.

“Can… Can I?” you ask, waiting to receive his permission before you move your hands from your lap. 

“Yeah, baby, go ahead,” Joel allows. 

You reach out a small hand to gently trace over the raised scar, then press your lips to it with your hands splayed out on either side of your head, just barely pressing into his belly. He releases a soft groan, cradling the back of your head with one of his hands, applying the lightest amount of pressure to let you know this is where he wants to keep you. 

“Why don’t you keep goin’, sweetheart? Gimme some more lovin’ like that, know you wanna,” he encourages, and you think you get the idea now, what it is he wanted to put your pretty mouth to use for.

With his explicit permission to continue, you don’t need telling twice. You move your face to hover just in front of his belly button, admiring the dense salt and pepper happy trail that sprouts from where his jeans push into his soft skin. You drag your tongue along the hair, nipping at the soft curve of where it disappears into the divot in his stomach. He makes a noise in response, half pained and half pleasured, but he doesn’t stop you. Just for good measure, you place a kiss to the little blushing mark where your teeth had scraped him.

Almost of their own volition, it seems, your hands begin to knead at his stomach as you make good on your promise to yourself to kiss every single one of his stretch marks. You allow your tongue to dart from your mouth on the last one, and Joel sucks in a breath.

“Oh, fuck. Forgot how good that wet lil’ mouth feels on me, sweetheart. Keep goin’,” he says, voice coming out strained. His fingers curl tightly into your hair, and he begins to maneuver your face around his belly. You lave your tongue over his skin as he does, slicking him with wet, sloppy kisses. “Yeah, baby, you fuckin’ worship it, show me how much you like me like this.”

It’s a little humiliating, but just enough that you like the feeling. You’re breathing hard and fast, letting out little whimpers as your fluttering cunt begins to soak your underwear. He brings your face to a stop at the most tantalizing part of him, the part that truly evidences how much more he’s allowed himself to indulge since settling in Jackson. The ample curve of flesh that just barely conceals the waistband of his jeans, the part you’ve wanted to get your mouth on since you first saw how it strained the lower buttons of his shirt. You latch onto it, massaging the skin around it as you use your teeth and tongue to suck a mark into him.

A growl rumbles from deep in his chest, and he curses under his breath. “Like it that much, huh? Fuck, naughty thing, look at you.”

You’re so fucking turned on, you’re shivering, rocking where you kneel and squeezing your thighs together in an attempt to get some kind of relief. You let one of your hands drift to the hard shape in Joel’s jeans, and it seems he’s enjoying this as much as you are. He spots your pathetic little squirms as you rut against nothing, and then he’s using his grip on your hair to pull you up from the floor.

“Got an idea. Up,” he commands roughly, and you detach your lips from his belly to obey his order. “Get these off, there we go.” He pulls down your sweatpants and underwear, helping you step out of them. “Christ, you’re soaked,” Joel teases, eyeing the sizable wet spot in your panties as he tosses them aside to join the other forgotten clothing. He reaches a hand toward the apex of your thighs, teasing your wet pussy and gathering some of your slick on two of his fingers. You let out a tiny yelp, but let him play with you, and then he’s bringing his fingers in front of his face and examining the sticky strings of your arousal when he spreads them apart. “All this just from lettin’ you worship all this, huh?” he taunts, patting his stomach once for emphasis. “Who’d’ve thought? Not that I’m complainin’...”

He quickly rids himself of his jeans and briefs, then reclines onto the couch with a quiet groan, stretching out his body along the length of it. Your mouth waters at the sight of his cock, hard and leaking as it bobs against his belly, his precum adding to the dampness still there from your tongue. “Come sit, sweetheart,” Joel says, softly, motioning with both of his hands for you to come closer.

You grip a hand onto the backrest of the couch to balance yourself while you move to straddle him, prepared to sink down onto his length for the first time in way too fucking long. “Uh uh, not there, baby,” he instructs, smirking when he sees how you hesitate in confusion. “Take a seat right here for me.” Again, he pats that most tempting area of his lower belly, and you just about fall apart at the sight of how his flesh ripples in the wake of it.

“Yeah, there you go, good girl,” he praises, both hands gripping your waist as he helps you settle your weight onto his soft abdomen.

“I dunno, don’t wanna hurt you–” you start, but he cuts you off swiftly.

“You won’t, baby. I’m a big man, ain’t I?” he teases, flashing you a devilish and knowing smile. “Go on, sweetheart, ride it.”

You inhale a shuddering breath, then place both of your hands on his shoulders to hold yourself up. You start an experimental buck into his belly, and that trail of dark hair tickles your clit so perfectly. It takes a few tries for you to get the positioning and pressure just right, and then you’re truly riding him, using his full stomach to get yourself off while he watches. 

“God, that’s good. Use it, baby. You love me bigger, love that I’ve been eatin’ so good, prove it to me, c’mon,” Joel goads, and it spurs you on to grind against him harder, faster, as incoherent mumbles and curses tumble from your lips.

“Love it, Joel, you look so good, fuck. So fucking–mmh–so big, makes me so… so–”

“I know it does, sweet girl, I know. Makes you fuckin’ soaked is what it does, god damn. You gonna get my belly all messy, hm? Gonna rub your lil’ cunt all over it, get me all fuckin’ wet?”

“Uh huh, yeah, gonna… I’m gonna–” you whine, eyes shutting tight as your hips pick up their pace. You move your hands from his shoulders to place them on his stomach instead, grabbing at handfuls of his tummy in an effort to create something more solid to rub yourself against. 

You’re already embarrassingly close, the humiliating edge to your earlier worship having gotten you most of the way there on its own. So swollen and sensitive it almost hurts, you won’t need much more to reach your high.

“Not without me, you ain’t. Gonna be right there with ya. You remember how we used to do it?” Joel asks, as if you could ever forget. He’s referring to your many late nights, early mornings, in his bed or in a back alley or wherever in the QZ, where he liked to make sure you both finished at the same time. You’d always be the first one to reach the edge, because he’d focus all his attention on getting you there before him, just to make you wait. It was never something punishing, just something he liked to do as an extra bit of control and dominance, and he knew it always made your orgasms that much more powerful and satisfying when he would finally permit you to let go.

With your eyes closed, so focused on your own pleasure, you hadn’t noticed that he had reached behind you to start fisting his cock some time ago. But you can hear it now, the wet schlick of his hand moving up and down his shaft as he works himself. “Hold it for me, sweetheart, I know you can. Keep rubbin’ your pretty pussy against me, jus’ like that, almost there…”

You mewl, screwing your face up as you force yourself to slow down your thrusts, muscles tense as you try to keep your orgasm at bay for as long as you can. 

Thankfully, he must be worked up enough from seeing you fall apart for him so easily for the first time in so long, that his permission comes just a few minutes later.

“Come for me, babygirl, soak my fuckin’ belly, c’mon,” Joel growls, and you fall forward immediately, twitching and spasming and crying out into the soft muscle of his shoulder as you ride out the shuddering shocks of your orgasm. He groans next to your ear as he comes, and you can feel the warm ropes of his own release as some of them land on your lower back. You’re both wet, heaving messes, as you embrace each other for the second time today and work on catching your breath.

So exhausted from the day you had, you must’ve fallen asleep against his chest as you laid there, because then you’re being woken up by the dull scratch of his fingertips against your scalp and his familiar voice working its way through the thick fog that clouds your tired brain. 

“You alright, baby?” he asks, and you can hear that he’s smiling, amused at this sleepy little thing he’s got clinging to him.

“Mhm, jus’ tired,” you answer, a barely-there mumble of a sentence.

“I’ll bet… You wanna get cleaned up? Get all tucked into bed?”

You shake your head against his neck, and he chuckles.

“No? Whatcha wanna do then, hm?”

“Jus’ lay here. Missed you. Don’t wanna let… go…” 

Your sentence drifts off into silence before the temptation of sleep allows you to finish it, but Joel gets the idea. He smiles to himself, kissing the top of your head, and hugs you closer. Both of you are still sticky and damp, but satisfied. And together again. And that’s a hell of a lot better than the alternative.

So he agrees, and you stay like that for the rest of the night. Joel doesn’t worry about whether or not he remembered to set his alarm clock for his extra patrol shift the next morning, or if he’ll even hear it all the way from his bedroom upstairs, because it doesn’t matter anyway. He has you, and you made it very clear tonight just how much you like him exactly the way he is. 

Maybe, your rose garden can finally begin to bloom, now that the pair of you have somewhere safe and comfortable and healthy to try your hand at nurturing it again.

tag list: @beefrobeefcal @iamasaddie @rebel-held @dilfgestivo @zliteraturehoe @joeldjarin @kamcrazy123 @hellowoolf @rexamongthestars @stevie75 @luxurychristmaspudding @noisynightmarepoetry @mewantpeepaw @pedritoferg (if your name is crossed out, it won’t let me tag you!!)

[midatwrtr]

Turn back time

LE SSERAFIM Sakura x Male Reader

6.6k words

Tags: Fluff & Smut

It was a chilly night of spring when you met Sakura. You were coming home from a late shift and she was sitting in front of your apartment. Your boss decided to abuse his position again by forcing you to work overtime, using some loophole in your contract as an excuse. You didn’t recognize her at first in the dark, she simply looked like a drunk teenager.

You could have ignored her, walked right past her, and everything would have been alright, but somehow, you didn’t. 

“Hey, are you okay?” you asked her, walking closer. She was wearing a pleaded shirt and jeans, while she used a black cap and black mask to cover her face. You made sure not to get too close, she was still a stranger, who knew what she had under her shirt. 

“Mh? What?” she replied with a surprisingly clear voice.

“Oh, I was just checking if you were okay,” you said carefully. “I mean, you’re sitting here alone, in the middle of nowhere…”

“You’re right, it doesn’t look very good, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah,” you answered. “So? Did you drink or something?”

“Oh, no, I didn’t have anything,” she said, mortified. “I was just having…” she sighed. “A bad day. That’s all.”

"Do you want to talk about it?" you asked, the words coming out almost instinctively. You weren't particularly interested, but you understood that she needed someone that listened to her. It was more about offering her a chance to vent than satisfying your own curiosity.

The girl stared at you for a second, dumbfounded.

“I don’t have anything to do tonight anyways,” you added in case she felt guilty.

She thought about it for a second. It was a bit personal but after all, it wasn’t a bad idea. She didn’t even know your name and you didn’t know hers. For all she knew, you were a stranger she could have met on the internet behind an actor’s photo. What were the chances that she’d meet you again? 

“Well…” she started. You crouched down and sat next to her. You could see the moon peaking through the darkened clouds.

“You know, it’s been a rough day,” she said. “It seems like no matter what I do, people always have something to say.”

“Mh, I’m sorry to hear that. Sometimes it does feel like that.”

“Exactly,” she sighed deeply and then she straightened her back. “You know, it’s just so frustrating!” she growled, tensing her hands. “I’ve been doing this for years, and still, there’s always someone saying I’m not doing it right. It’s like they don’t even see how hard I work!”

“That sounds really tough,” you agreed. “People can be so quick to judge.”

“Exactly! They don't see the long hours I put in, the constant pressure to be perfect. They just hear one thing they don't like and suddenly they're experts, telling me how I should do things differently. It's infuriating!

"And the worst part is, sometimes it's not even constructive criticism. It's just mean like they're trying to tear me down. Why do they do that? Can't they see I'm just trying to do what I love? I don't understand why people feel the need to be so harsh!"

“It's tough when people don't see the effort and passion you put into it," you agreed. “But I bet there are still people that love what you do.”

“You’re right, it’s not all that bad. My friends are really supportive and always have been. They remind me why I started this in the first place and keep me grounded.”

“That’s great to hear. It makes a huge difference having people with you.”

“Yes. They're the ones who always believed in me, even when I doubted myself. It's like they see something in me that I sometimes forget” The girl sighed happily. “They're amazing. They are always close to me and help me when it gets too much.”

“It sounds like your friends do a good job of helping you focus on the right things. It's like having a personal cheering squad.”

The girls laughed. “That’s exactly what they are.”

Then she sighed deeply, her demeanor changing. "You know, as supportive as my friends are, I sometimes feel like I'm becoming a burden to them. They're always there for me, listening to my complaints and trying to cheer me up, but I worry I'm dragging them down."

"I doubt they see it that way. Friends are there for the good and the bad times."

"I know, but I can't help but feel guilty. like, how much can they take before they get tired of it?"

"It's natural to feel that way, but real friends don't see you as a burden. They care about you and want to support you, no matter what,” you said. “The important thing is that you’re still working hard. If they see your efforts, they will help you.”

"I hope so,” she said, her voice wavering. “They've never said anything to make me think otherwise, but sometimes I just feel so... needy, I guess. Like, I should be able to handle this on my own and not rely on them so much."

"It sounds like you're being too hard on yourself. Everyone needs support sometimes, and it doesn't make you a burden. It makes you human."

She nodded slowly. “I guess you’re right.”

"If they're there for you now, you've probably been there for them before. It's okay to lean on them. When something happens, you’ll return the favor,” you said. “For example, my friend helped me finish the project. So I bought him a really cool shirt, it was like this Pokemon-themed thing with Charmander and stuff, right? Because he liked Pokemon,” you paused. “But it was two sizes too small.”

The girl giggled. Her laughter bubbled up, bright and infectious.

“God, he looked ridiculous. But it’s alright. He was trying to lose weight anyways, it will motivate him.”

“Yeah, I am sure you did him a favor,” she said joyfully.

“That’s what I am saying!”

The girl recollected herself. "Thanks. I guess I just needed to hear that. It's hard to remember that sometimes, especially when I'm feeling overwhelmed."

You got up, patting your pants off to get rid of the dirt. “Do you want me to help you go back home? It’s kinda late now.”

The girl hesitated for a second. She didn’t know how to answer that question.

“Do you live far away? Do you want me to call a cab?”

“No, it’s not that…” her voice trailed off.

You listened to her silence for a second and understood. “You don’t want to go home, right? How about you stay here for the night? I have a guest room.”

“Well, I don’t want to disturb you…”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it, it will be just tonight.”

She was a bit hesitant, she didn’t want to impose herself but you were sincere and she accepted the offer. You walked to your apartment, modest and minimal. You didn’t need a lot to live comfortably and you were at the job most of the time anyway.

When she took off her cap and mask, you realized who she was. You chose not to say anything. You didn’t want to scare her away. 

“Are you allergic to anything—?” you asked, you stopped just a moment before saying her name.

“Sakura,” she added. “No, I’m not allergic to anything.”

You quickly made her feel at home, showing her around and offering her a spot at the kitchen table while you prepared a simple meal.

As you cooked, you continued their conversation. She opened up about her life as a singer, and the passion she had for music. You already knew most of it but you wanted to hear it from her, it was much more interesting.

You listened attentively, sharing your own experience at work. It became a healing experience for you. You ate together, enjoying the meal and continuing to talk. You learned about her love for mangas, and how much she played videogames. You were a gamer as well, that’s where most of your money went and why your house was so bare. 

“If I could turn back time…” Sakura said, in the middle of your conversation about her idol life. “I wonder if I’d choose to be an idol again. Maybe I should have become a soloist.”

“Grass is always greener on the other side” you replied. “I’m sure once you’re old, you’ll look back at it and think it was a great experience.”

“I hope so.”

When it got late, you offered her the guest room, fortunately, you kept it clean. She accepted and you said goodnight.

Sakura didn’t feel like a celebrity. You felt like you met a good friend and you wanted to keep it that way. In the morning, you prepared her breakfast and bid her goodbye. You didn’t expect her to come back and neither did she. It was supposed to be a one time thing, to get her mind off.

But a week later, she knocked at the door and you were happy to welcome her.

It started with small exchanges—it was a bit more embarrassing now that you were both conscious of each other. Sakura would sometimes bring her books and discuss them with you, or you would turn on the TV and watch animes together. 

As the days turned into weeks, the conversations grew longer. You talked about her past, your past, your problems. It was a safe space for the both of you, where you could be honest with eachother. Sakura found herself looking forward to these moments with you, your presence becoming a familiar comfort in her life. It became a routine.

Her eyes sparkled everytime she spoke with you and you would always listen to her. You loved the way she spoke with such passion. 

But one day, you had to leave. 

It was your boss again. “I made some arrangements with this company, it’s a big opportunity, you have to leave tomorrow. I already scheduled the flight.” You couldn’t refuse and you didn’t have Sakura’s phone number either. You left in the early morning and didn’t hear from Sakura since.

A week later, you finally came back home. You close the door of your friend’s car and thank him. You take a deep breath, finally the air of your town, you missed it. Taking the stairs, you reach your floor and there she was, standing weakly in front of your door, Sakura.

“Oh my god, Sakura! What are you doing here!” you exclaim.

“You—! You’re back! You asshole why didn’t you say anything!” Sakura rushes to your arms and hugs you tightly. “God, I thought something happened to you! I thought the loansharks kidnapped you.”

“It was just a work trip,” you say. “And sorry I didn’t say anything, I didn’t have your number.”

“Oh. Well, I’ll give it to you right now,” she hurries you. You take out your phone and add her digits. 

“Is that your stage outfit?” you ask her.

“Yeah, I rushed here. I didn’t really feel like changing, I wanted to see you,” she says. Her sentence shocks you. You couldn’t shake off the feeling that there was more to it. You thought about all the little things—how she always seemed to know you were having a rough day, how she always came to you first to vent about her troubles.

You smiled but were worried. It wasn’t like you hadn’t thought about Sakura in that way before. You did plenty of times, but there was always some reason not to pursue it.

“But you didn’t even know that I’d be here,” you comment.

“I felt it.”

“You have a sixth sense, don’t you?” you laugh as you open the door for her.

With a quickly made dinner, you have time to catch up with Sakura. She had a lot to talk about, not only about her members but also all the other idols she met during the shows. She had a lot to vent about, people aren’t as nice as they look.

Sakura offers to clean up the rest of the dinner, which isn’t a lot since you have already cleaned most of the dishes, and in the meantime, you go and take a shower. Cleaning up the remnants of your hastily prepared dinner, Sakura tosses the scraps into the trash bin before wiping the table. Once everything is tidy again, she heads towards the bathroom to take off her makeup.

However, while passing by the bedroom, she finds you lying sprawled across the bed, fast asleep. An odd mix of emotions courses through her veins—it is a combination of fondness and happiness. You look so cute carelessly snoozing with that sleepy face of yours. She wants to join you, to touch you. She wants to do what she sees in the shows, to hold your hand, hug you while you sleep, and kiss you.

Sakura isn’t sure if her feelings are right, especially after everything that has happened to her. She knows to trust you, but to love you? Is she allowed such a luxury? Her mind tells her to steer clear, to not get mixed up in such a troublesome relationship, but she is stubborn.

Her back shivers. Sakura can’t tear her gaze away from your sleeping face. Your soft breaths are like music to her ears, soothing and comforting.

Then you wake up. You look at Sakura through your tired eyes and smile. “Oh, sorry. I fell asleep, didn’t I?” you say, laughing, and Sakura exchanges a smile. “Say, aren’t you tired, Kkura?”

“Mh,” she hums. “A little bit. But you must be—” she trails off, unable to finish her sentence.

“Then join me,” you say, interrupting her. She opens her eyes a little wider as she values your offer. She could find countless reasons not to, but instead, she settles for a place beside you. She awkwardly lies down on the bed, slightly curling her legs and resting her arms close to herself. Her eyes never leave yours, watching your welcoming smile.

“I really missed you, Sakura,” you say. You laugh from the embarrassment, clenching your eyes. “I got so used to your presence that I keep going back to my bags thinking I left something at home.” You pause to take a breath. “I guess it was you.”

Sakura is surprised. She listens to you silently, feeling that warm sensation inside her chest slowly expanding to the rest of her body. “I missed you too,” she confesses.

“The bulgogi at the cafeteria just doesn’t taste the same, you know?” You laugh. Feeling the mattress dip beside her, Sakura becomes aware of your presence. The wave of heat coursing through her veins makes her heart race wildly. Carefully unfolding her legs, she slides closer to you, nestling herself against your warmth, finally accepting your invite. Sakura catches her breath as your arm slips around her waist, pulling her even closer.

“This feels nice,” she says, and you giggle. It is a gentle embrace, completely different from the coldness that she had to endure for the week you were away. She simply lies there, letting the familiar scent of you envelop her, calming her frayed nerves.

“Don’t you want to change into some more comfortable clothes?” you ask Sakura.

“Mh? You don’t want to see me in it?” Sakura replies in a light tone. “You don’t like it?” she teases you.

You keep brushing her soft blonde hair. “No, it’s not that. I think you could be more comfortable in something else… but I don’t mind it at all. Besides,” you swallow your saliva, “it looks really good on you.”

“Oh? How good?” she coos, moving her hair away from the red top. You remember your reaction from earlier: how you choke at the sight of her tight top hugging her pearly white chest, how her toned midriff peeks from her gray pleated skirt, and how all the blood leaves your head. But you can’t say it, of course, and settle for a “Very good.”

“Come on, be more specific!” Sakura whines in annoyance.

“Ten out of ten!”

“You always say that,” she says.

“Because it’s true,” you retort.

“You know what I mean…” she says with a softer tone, looking at you with her typical puppy eyes. There you go. She plays with your feelings again. What are you supposed to feel? Your mind is a mess. She is so adorable, yet so hot.

You sigh. “Well…” you start. “I think you’re terribly hot. You make my head spin every time I see you. And today, you are unbelievable.”

Sakura clings to you tighter, taking refuge in your chest. Her breath comes in short, needy gasps; who knew words could be so piercing? She knows she wants you to say it, but she doesn’t know how it’d feel like.

Shifting ever so slightly, she presses her lower body against yours, finding comfort in her arousal.

“When you say it like that…” Sakura whispers. “Is it too much?”

“Too much for me to handle, that’s for sure.”

Sakura rubs herself against you, her hips moving slowly, riding your thigh. She starts moaning, low groans choked in her throat. She grows more desperate. Your words were turning her on. She wants you to see more of her, she wants your eyes planted on her body, she wants more. Sakura knew this was going to be a mistake, that she should stop before crossing the line, but she couldn’t resist anymore.

“Mh,... is that all?” She asks you once more.

“I have nothing nice to say, believe me,” you admit and Sakura understood perfectly. You finally notice her movements on her leg and you are just as aroused as her. At the same time, you are worried if her intentions were truly honest and if she wasn’t being carried away by the heat of the moment. You knew how impulsive Sakura was.

Swallowing hard, Sakura meets your gaze, refusing to look away. She could see the concern etched on your face, the worry mirrored in her eyes. For a brief moment, she contemplates pushing you away… and then she decides against it. Her hips don’t stop rubbing against you. She keeps holding you. Sakura wanted to know what you felt and what she felt.

Closing the remaining distance between you two, she captures your lips in a firm resolute kiss. 

Caught in the heat of her excitement, you couldn’t do anything else but kiss her back. Moaning against your lips, Sakura loses herself in the feeling of your lips. Rolling on top of you, her arms around your neck, she keps kissing you deeper and deeper. Her skin was warm and smooth beneath your fingers, a stark contrast to the rough texture of your own.

Pulling away slightly, she looks into your eyes. She could see her own pure raw desire reflected back in your eyes. Without hesitation, she guides your hand between her thighs. “Are you sure, Sakura?” you ask one last time.

“I am.” You could feel the moistness around her shorts. She invites you into her panties, into herself. Your fingers trace lazy circles around her swollen clit. She grips your shoulders tightly as the pleasure scatters through her legs. 

Arching her back, Sakura gasps as your fingers effortlessly slipped inside her wet folds. Her muscles tensed and relaxed, spasms of pleasure, drawing you deeper. 

Sakura lets out a high-pitched whine. “Mh!” You hit a sensitive spot inside of her. Waves of pure bliss ripple throughout her body. Her grip on your shoulders tightens painfully as you continue to finger her pussy.

Sakura’s mind spirals out of control leaving her breathless moans. 

“Can I see it?” you ask softly. Painting heavily, Sakura glances down for a moment at her spread legs, catching the sight of your fingers buried inside of her. She shudders at the sight of the messiness of her juices. They coated your hand, dripping down to your wrist and forearm.

She forces herself to meet your eyes to nod quietly. You quickly take of her shorts and underwear and take a good look of her wet lips. Gasping at the cool air, Sakura stared at you with worry as she was revealing her most intimate parts to you. She finds herself even more aroused than before.

With both hands at either side of her vagina, you part her slightly. You look at the droplets of wetness leaving her hole, sliding down her pink flesh, the warm scent invading your nostrils. You take a moment to observe how her muscles twitched but you couldn’t resist any longer. You open your mouth and dip your tongue inside of her.

“I love how you taste, Sakura,” you muffle. “You’re just as good as I imagined.”

Your words make her moan harder. Every finger of lower body tighten at the new sensation. You lick her slowly, spreading your tongue out on her pussy, licking from the bottom to the top, pausing on her clit. You send waves of pleasure to her head, making it difficult for her to remain still. Her legs clamp around your head. Her soft thighs just make it more enjoyable.

You eat her with voracity, making your head up and down. Sakura helps you by stretching her lips further apart with her hands, giving you full access to every inch of her folds. Her walls clench around your tongue, contracting involuntarily. 

You stop for a moment to swallow the liquids piled on your tongue. Sakura can’t wait a single second. “Please continue,” she pleads.

“You want it that bad?” you say with satisfaction.

“Yes,” she admits. “Please, eat me out.” “I will,” you conclude and go back to her pussy. This time, you wrap your lips on her clit and start sucking it softly. You don’t give her time to adjust as your fingers enter her at the same time, fingering her helpless hole. 

Sakura goes crazy. She begs for release. “Ah! Fuck! Don’t stop!” Her fingers dig into your shoulders, leaving bruises all around your back. Lewd wet noises sloppily resonate through your mouth. Moaning your name nonstop, she is pushed more and more to the edge. The orgasm approaches rapidly. With a feral growl, she explodes, wracked by wave after wave of ecstatic pleasure.

Arching her back, she clutches your head, pulling you deeper inside her. Thick liquid drips from her swollen pussy, thick cum flow right into your mouth. Breathless and spent, she collapses back onto the pillows, utterly exhausted but satisfied.

You continue by softly eating up her remaining cum. Watching in disbelief as you eagerly lap up the sticky remnants of their passion, Sakura's breath hitches in her throat. 

“I didn’t know you could do that,” you said and laughed.

“I didn’t know I could do that either,” she repeated, giggling and covering her blushed face. 

Panting heavily, Sakura lays still sprawled across the bed, her body still pulsing with residual with the residual kickback of the orgasm. When you nuzzle your face against her exposed stomach, she moans softly, arching her back invitingly. Her leg itch, the shivers discend to her core. "Mmm…" she murmurs, begging you to continue.

Her fingers brush through your hair. You leave small pecks and smooches on her tone midriff, trailing your lips along the grooves of her abs. Your hands hold her hips, lifting her arched body closer to your face. Her heart swells with tenderness, she’s grateful, you truly care for her and want to make her happy. 

Your head further ascends along her body, stopping at the hem of her top. You look up to her, to her flushed cheeks and clouded eyes, panting heavily. “Can I see them?” you ask her.

She nods, “Yes…” Sakura then sits up to take of her top. It’s a bit complicated, she raises her arms and slowly pulls it off. When she takes of her last layer, you hold your breath. The tube bra finally slips off and her breasts fall down. They are beautiful.

Though not as big as they looked under the clothes, the shape was a lot more inviting. They were slightly saggy, drooping to either sides, with rounded nipples and beautiful pink nipples. There was a mole right on her left breast that you had never noticed. 

You look at her eyes just to be sure and gently grope her breasts. She lets out a small moan, bringing her hands back to open her chest to you. Blushing deeply, Sakura looks down your eager expression, her heart racing. She’s surprised at how excited you were and it made her even more aroused.

“Do you really like them that much even if they’re small?” she asked.

“They are perfect, Sakura,” you said. “And they could’ve been 100 different shapes but I’d still love them, because they are yours.”

Sakura smiled and locked her arms around your back. She's grown accustomed to your touch now and she couldn’t be happier. Her nipples harden beneath your fingers and she struggles to keep her composure. "It’s okay, keep going..." she whispers, her voice barely audible above the rapid beat of her heart.

Leaning in closer, she captures your lips in a heated kiss but you don’t stop fondling her soft breasts. She falls back to the bed and her boobs fall to the sides. Your hands collect them back up and you continue to play with her mounds.

Her body trembles as you continue to knead and tease her sensitive breast, alternating between gentle strokes and firmer pinches. Sakura bites down on her lip, but she doesn’t hide her moans, you love them. 

She had never felt so exposed yet so safe before. She wanted your hands to explore every inch of your body, she wanted you to know every part of her. And now she wanted to see you as well.

“Are you going to take off your clothes?” she asks.

“Oh, yeah,” you answered, only now realizing she was the only one naked. You made it quick, not wanting to make her wait too long. You were a bit embarrassed to show her your body, especially since it wasn’t nearly as toned as hers. However, if Sakura didn’t care than neither should you.

You were also worried about your size. Your hands were both covering your crotch, the head of your penis peeking between your fingers.

Sakura flashed a seductive smile and got closer to you. “Are you really going to hide that pretty cock of yours?” she asks you. Her hand grab your fingers and she peels off your hands. She licks her lips and palms your balls, holding your cock out right on her right hand. She silently looks at it for a second, looking at how hard it was, standing so tall just for her. That’s what she loved. You were hard for her.

And she was wet for you.

“Sit down,” she told you and you obliged, keeping your legs open. With her hand still under your balls, she raised your cock higher, giving her full access to the whole length. And then she was blowing you. With a hand at the base, she wraps your head with her wet mouth, beginning to move her head in slow, circular motions. Her eyes stare right back at you, with her sunken lips, looking for your approval.

Your flushed face is enough for Sakura. She increases the pace of her actions, sucking harder and faster on your rock hard penis. The muscles in her mouth stretch as she takes you deeper than ever before, her cheeks hollowing out with each passing thrust. A thin stream of saliva drips down from the corner of her mouth, mixing with your precum and forming a sticky trail along her jawline. 

She tries her best but she couldn’t take you into her throat. The pleasure was still enough for you to roll back your eyes. Continuing with her sucking and bobbing, the mix of fluids foamed up to a frothy white substance, sloppily falling down her mouth, to her hands, to your crotch.

Feeling you pulling her head down, thrusting your penis roughly into her throat, Sakura gasps for air. Her gag reflex kicks in momentarily, causing her to gag and choke briefly, but she quickly regains control, continuing to work her mouth. 

It could have been only a couple minutes but you couldn’t last any longer. It all came so fast, you couldn’t even warn Sakura that you were already filling her mouth with cum. Your release startled her, she opened her eyes and jolted back, letting the cum spill out to her hands. 

You continued letting out a couple more splurts before you could stop, however you were still twitching maniacally. “Oh my god, sorry Sakura,” you said.

“Oh, don’t worry about it,” she laughed it off. “That’s exactly the reaction that I wanted. Now let me taste this…”

Sakura scooped up all the semen that had escaped her mouth and poured it back inside. With a slurp, the last strings of cum left her palms. She gulped it down and showed you her empty mouth. She let out a satisfied giggle, watching your dumbfounded face. 

“Well, look like that got you hard again, huh?” Sakura said watching your penis coming back to life. “You’re so naughty.”

“You’re the one that just—look at what you just did,” you retorted.

“You’re right…” she agreed. “So? What are you gonna do no? Are you gonna put it in?”

“Do you want to?” you asked.

“I do.”

“Then I’ll do it.”

Sakura laid down on the bed, taking your place. You looked at her, her hair sprawled on the white sheets, her pearly white skin covered in her shiny sweat, her perfectly round breasts drooping down her chest, her creamy thighs. She looked like an angel. You couldn’t believe that you were going to do it with her.

You weren’t the only one. Sakura didn’t want anyone else but you, she’s been thinking about you this whole time and this was going to be the seal of her love.

Sakura opened her legs and let you get closer. With her hand, she helped guiding yourself inside. You sank in with ease. You were forced to blink rapidly and grit your teeth at the new sensation. It was incredibly tight, completely wet, and burning hot.

Your penis stretched her open. She moaned and contorted her face as her vagina opened up to you. Her hand gripped down your forearm with all her might.

“God…” she sighed.

“Are you okay, Sakura?” you asked worryingly. “Does it hurt? We can stop if you want.”

“No, no, it’s not that, we can keep going,” she said. “I just have to get used to it. It’s a bit uncomfortable, that’s all.”

She breathed deeply and pulled on your shoulder, “Please, slowly.” 

“Alright,” you said. You contracted all of your muscles to be as slow as possible, as gentle as you could. You let yourself sink, a millimeter at a time, being extremely careful not to let out any sudden movement. Sakura’s face relaxed as you went in, she stared blankly, giving all her attention to the feeling between her legs.

“Okay, like that… alright, that’s it,” she let you know. “I’m good now. I think.”

“Tell me what to do,” you said.

“Try thrusting it a bit,” she said. You nodded and guided your hips back before slowly thrusting your penis back inside. 

“Oh…” Sakura moaned. She didn’t look in pain, you were glad. “Yep, that’s good. That’s really good. You can keep going.”

You nodded again and started thrusting at a regular pace, still slow. 

Sakura flips around, grabbing the pillow in front of her. You plunge yourself back inside and using your whole weight, you stretch her to the point of bulging her belly. 

Gripping the sheets tightly, Sakura cries out in both pain and ecstasy as you brutally claim her pussy. Her vagina accepts you, stretching wide to accommodate your whole length. Each forceful thrust sends waves of pleasure rippling through her body. 

Her moans become more and more primal. She cries out in ecstasy, muffling the screams into her pillow.

Unable to contain your growing hunger, you move relentlessly at the roughest pace possible, trying to satisfy your lust. Your movements become increasingly frantic, punctuated by your grunts. Every brutal thrust fills her to the brim, making her feel used and ravaged. The bed shakes violently beneath you as your passion escalates, leaving the once pristine linens drenched in sweat and other fluids.

Despite the intensity of your assault, Sakura doesn't fight it—she loves it.

The new pace costs you a lot. After a minute, you’re tired and way closer than before. You breath heavily, slowing down to give the both of you a rest. Sakura is panting and couldn’t even keep her head up.

“Sorry, Sakura, could you turn around another time?” you asked between your heavy breaths.

“Sure…” she replies weakly. “It will be better for me too.”

You groan quietly as you slide back into her. The rest of her body is stretched out on the bed, she’s way too tired to do anything else. You grab her hips and raise them in a prone stance so you can go deeper. It works, she immediately tightens around you so intensely that you feel like you might climax instantly. Her hands clutch the edge of the bed, her moans are free and loud as her face is no longer buried in the cushions. It's clear that she's on the brink of orgasm, and you continue to thrust into her as hard as possible.

You lean forward to place kisses on her neck and shoulder, your body pressing on top of hers as you slow down the pace to a grind. You want her to feel loved and worshipped. She tries to look up at you but the pleasure is so immense that she can only focus on your blurry silhouette. Sakura is so lightheaded that she her words sound drunk and splurred. 

“I—I’m gonna cum,” she says. “Please I want you to cum too!”

A few more thrusts before the dam breaks, her squirt flooding your bed as she moans your name much louder than before.

“I love you!” she screams.

You don’t stop thrusting however as you are also very close to reaching your orgasm. Wrap your hands around her small waist and you can feel her toned abs contracting and relaxing as the spasms of her orgasm keep milking you. Her squirt floods the grooves of her abs, pooling into a shiny mess. 

“I’m really gonna cum now,” you says. “I’m gonna cover you in cum!”

“Do it, please!”

“Fuck!” There was no way you were going to last any millisecond longer and with one final thrust, you spill everything you have been saving on her abs. Ribbons after ribbons of thick sperm cover her tummy, her breasts and some even get to her face.

Sakura lays there, exhausted. She wipes the cum of her abs, playing with it, looking at how the strings of thick cum stretch between her fingers. “It’s really warm,” she comments, with satisfaction. “I made you cum a lot, huh?”

“I thought I was going to pass out,” you admit.

She laughs.“Me too.”

You inhale for a moment. “Let me get you some towels.” You get off the bed and walk to the closet. Only then you notice how sore your legs truly were and you have to hold the door to stand up. You grab a couple from the stack of towels and hand them to Sakura.

“Here you go,” you say and help her stand up. Sakura takes them and slowly wipes her whole body. You could feel some of the remaining blood feeding into your penis but you were too tired to do anything else. So you sat down on the bed, besides her.

“You got work tomorrow?” you asked Sakura.

“No, nothing.”

“That’s good,” you say. “Otherwise the others would have scolded me. I can’t imagine what Yunjin would do to me.”

Sakura lets out a breathy laugh, amused but weary. Her shoulders shake gently, and her eyes though tired, sparkled. “Don’t worry, I wouldn’t tell her.”

“Thanks,” you said and gave her a smile. “Let’s get cleaned up now.”

The two of you sluggishly move around the bathroom. Sakura must have gotten used to feeling tired after all the dance practices but emotional exhaustion was something else. It wasn’t just the sore muscles, she was exhausted from the ecstasy. 

She splashes cool water on her face, and quickly takes off her makeup. You brush your teeth with your eyes half-closed, the toothbrush moving lazily. You exchange tired smiles through the mirror, knowing you are the reason for the other’s tiredness. 

Once done, you shuffle back to the bedroom and drop on the bed.

Sat beside you, disheveled and natural, Sakura looked unreal. Bathed by the pool of the moonlight, she only sat still, but your heart couldn’t stop pounding. She was your world.

You took a deep breath when you remembered her words earlier. “I love you.” That’s what she said. “I love you.” Sure, you were in the heat of the moment, the adrenaline was pumping harder than anything else and she probably didn’t even mean it. Maybe it was a “I love how you make me feel.” Maybe it was just another way to praise you. But what if it wasn’t?

You had to know. “By the way…” you start. You gulp down. “Did you say ‘I love you’ before?”

Realizing what she said, Sakura’s face pales slightly. For some reason, she felt scared, and she wanted to cover her face. “Oh, I—I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say that. I mean, I do care about you, but—”

With your heart pounding, you interrupt her. You try to talk to her as gently as possible. “Sakura, wait. Did you mean it? Because if you did, it’s okay.”

Sakura hesitates, she can’t look at your eyes, then nods. “Yeah, I did mean it. I’ve been trying to keep it to myself, but… After this week,” she sighs with frustration. She couldn’t believe what she was saying right now. “Fuck, I just couldn’t stop thinking about you. I just never had the courage to say it. I don’t want to lose you, I care about you too much.”

Your eyes soften as she talked. “Sakura, I feel the same way. Every time we’re together, I feel so happy, so alive. I didn’t want to say it either, because of the whole situation we got going on. But now that you said it… I won’t hide it.”

Tears well up in Sakura’s eyes, she’s relieved. So relieved. “Really? You feel that way too?”

Sakura stands up and jumps to hug you. You almost fall but you catch yourself with a foot. Her face is against yours, cheek to cheek, you can feel her tears run down your skin. “You have no idea how happy this makes me!”

You sat hand in hand, letting Sakura calm down as she wiped her tears. “You know that time that I told you I wanted to turn back time?”

“Yeah, it was the first time we met.”

“Mh, I thought about it and I wouldn’t change anything. Because I’ve got to meet you.”

You laugh. “God, how did I get so lucky to have you, Sakura. I love you!”

“I love you too!”

THE END

Written, 13 July 2024 - 18 July 2024

[moonfireshadow]

Rewatched Saltburn and I'm obsessed with Farleigh and Oliver's tutoring scene. The essay specifically. For those who don't remember: Oliver did his homework and all his assignments and genuinely gave a well thought out essay for their summer assignments. Farleigh shows up hungover and late and didn't even read the books. But the teacher immediately loves Farleigh and is chatting him up with an interest he barely tried to show Oliver. Even after Oliver gives his presentation and shows that he's clearly a much better student than Farleigh. Obviously this is the real start of their rivalry. But it's also such a beautiful look into their characters and how they mirror eachother. Farleigh understands Oliver's essay, I believe. But like the teacher he's bored by it. The knowledge and work is there, but the presentation of it is boring and strange. Academic and correct, but lacking the appeal to the audience. (Which, can we talk about the fact Farleigh was genuinely listening at all? The teacher zoned out and switched channels, but Farleigh was interested and paying enough attention to know the exact number of times Oliver used the word "thus" in his essay. They respect each other truly even if they despise eachother at this point, and refuse to acknowledge the grudging respect.) So Farleigh does what he does best, he gloats over Oliver. He picks apart the style of the essay and it's presentation rather than addressing the central argument or topic. This delights the teacher and frustrates Oliver who is like, "so you're going to critique the style of my essay rather than it's substance? Seems a bit lazy" and that's the core component of these two characters.

Farleigh is ALL about presentation. He knows how fragile his pedistal is placed up and in view for everyone to see. He's a charity project, just like every other rando of the month. Sure he has some familiar connection, and that's given him a leg up in this world. But it's still shakey at best. He always has to give the correct performance, say the right words, keep his audience on HIS side. Unless he wants to get knocked down with the rest of the common rabal that he knows he's belongs with, but can't stand the idea of. So yes, of course he picks apart the one thing he knows Oliver is failing at. He takes his one advantage over Oliver and uses it mercilessly to both entertain and secure his audience on his side. (I wonder if the positions had been different some how, if Farleigh would have had anything to say about the substance of the essay itself. He was paying attention to it, did he want to have a real academic conversation? Did he possibly want to try and connect to Oliver in that way? A real and non performative way with someone who's so similar to him?)

As for Oliver, obviously his character is intelligent. He does the readings. He does the research. He puts the time and effort in to *learn* in the way Farleigh never does. And it must infuriate him that his essay is so easily pushed to the side for a cheep critique that doesn't even address the central argument of his essay. Of course he would hate Farleigh from the start for that. It's such a quick negation of all that Oliver has to offer and give just because it's not wrapped up in a pretty bow. And that's just his character. The substance is there, the intelligence is there. But it's not enough. It will never be enough. Because Oliver doesn't know how to translate it to his audience in a way they'll care about. He learns and tries to mimic, but it always falls short because he just can't seem to figure out the way to blend in and present himself so seamlessly as Farleigh.

And that's why they're such perfect mirrors of each other. They're both intelligent and clever. But they've found different ways of getting what they want and proving themselves. Farleigh is the face and the presentation, Oliver is the substance and body. In another world imagine what these two could have done and been if they hadn't been pitted against each other for the same prize. And the fact Oliver definitely deliberately shoved Farleigh out at the perfect time so he wouldn't get hurt and killed? Oliver and Farleigh respect and admire the other. But their tragedy is they can never be on the same page or team because the world they're in says there is only room for one. And they'd both do anything to get that title.

[tiredfox64]

Hello! How you doing? I hope you're having a great day :D

I have a small request based on a funny picture I saw on twitter, where reader asks their crush/lover "Do you like sleeping?" and they're like "...yes?" then reader says "Wow, me too... We should try it together sometime"

I just can't choose which mk1 character, since I love all of them lmao. So I'll leave that up to you! Can be with anyone, sfw or not! your pick :p

Nap Time?

Yip notes: Hello! I’m doing alright, hope you are doing lovely （＾∇＾). This seems like such a fun idea. And you are letting me pick! Got me squealing.

Pairings: Tomas, Havik, Rain, Reiko x Afab reader

Warnings ‼️:NSFW, choking, biting, overstimulation (a bit), many positions

Tomas

Why would you ever trust Johnny to give you good advice? Trusting Johnny is a gamble, especially when you ask him for dating advice.

You were unsure of how to flirt with someone so you had to ask Johnny for help. And the help he gave you…was in the form of memes from Instagram and Twitter. He swore to you up and down that this would work on Tomas. You believed him, just like that?

So you tried it out. It might kill you to try to flirt but at least you made an effort to do so. You were a little nervous as you approached Tomas who was supervising the initiates. Immediately when he saw you he broke out into a smile. Your heart was going crazy from just looking at him. You didn’t realize the loving look in his eyes every time he stared at you. You two had a casual conversation for a bit, just the usual. You took a deep breath and tried remembering which pickup line you would use on Tomas. Something that will capture his attention but won’t be too forward.

“So…uh…do you like sleeping?” you asked.

He looked at you, his eyebrow cocked up in confusion, “…yes?”

“Wow, me too…we should try it together sometime.”

That was too forward girl! I thought you would be better than me.

You put your head down in shame before quickly walking off. A walk of shame if you will. That meant however that you missed Tomas’ reaction to your flirting. It was super effective! He knew what you meant because Johnny told him before. Thanks, Johnny. He went from his usual pale self to a shade of pink that only a rose could replicate. You’re just gonna leave him like that? All flustered like you didn’t just ask him to sleep with you. He didn’t know you felt that way about him.

You left him in an uncomfortable position. He couldn’t go find you because he had to supervise the initiates. But he was also trying to keep his composure and not think too much about being in bed with you. He can’t think about how his hands would be all over you, feeling your soft skin as his body is pressed against yours. Ah, too late he’s hard just from that. Pathetic. Better hide that.

The moment the initiates were done training he went looking for you. You were in your room, groaning into your pillows from the embarrassment you still were feeling. You thought this memory would haunt you forever. Oh how wrong you were.

Tomas was knocking on your door, still trying his best to keep his composure. You got up and opened the door. Before you could try to apologize for what you said he asked you something.

“Were you being serious? Please tell me you were being serious.” He said in desperation.

You were shocked. The pickup line worked? And he wanted you to be serious? Alright, ain’t you a winner.

You nodded your head and that’s all Tomas needed. He pushed his way into your room and only then did you notice his boner. It’s really hard to hide it with the uniform he has on. Well, go on, fix it. You started the war you better finish it. Get in bed! Scratch that, he will carry you to bed.

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

Your groans of embarrassment soon became groans of pleasure. And pants. And moans. And whimpers. Everything actually.

The pickup line sure did work. It got Tomas into bed with you, naked and desperate to pleasure himself with your body. You heard him groan and whimper every time he thrusted into you. He had you on your side with his chest pressed against your back and his hand on your thigh. He held your right leg up to have easier access to your pussy. His other arm was wrapped around your neck. He wasn’t choking you but holding you in place. He could choke you if that’s what you want.

You had no idea how long you guys were at it. It was like one second he was carrying you to your bed, the next he was ripping your clothes off, and now he had his dick inside of you. The dick must be good considering you were drooling in seconds and could only focus on how much he was stretching you out.

Don’t count yourself short because Tomas is just as dazed as you. Your pussy was as warm and tight as he imagined. When he first slid his cock in he let out a satisfied sigh, like he was relieved to feel your pussy squeezing him. The passion he was putting into each thrust was phenomenal. It’s like he was trying to fuck his love into you. That love sure was hitting your g-spot and making your moans go up a pitch. Soon your leg was shaking and you were telling him not to stop. He wasn’t planning on it. Tomas was as close as you were.

That pleasure was becoming greater and you both couldn’t handle it. One more deep thrust into you and you both were finished. You heard Tomas let out whimpers and moans as he came inside you. He was still thrusting a little which pushed the cum further into you. You would have been moaning as well if it weren’t for the fact that Tomas started choking you with his arm. You were not complaining. The lack of oxygen with your orgasm was the best feeling you have ever had. You could have sworn that the heavens opened and you were looking at the angels who looked down at you and asked ‘Is he gonna put a ring on it?’ Tomas better put a ring on it because you don’t ever want him leaving your side. Neither does he.

Tomas finally let you breathe once he realized he was choking you which you thanked him for doing. Like the gentleman he is he checked and asked if he hurt you anywhere. You told him to not worry and that you were fine. Once that was over he pulled you close to him and gave you kisses all over your face. He could stay here for hours with you so he could cuddle and kiss you. That lovemaking session sure did a number on you guys. It tired you out that you were soon falling asleep in his arms.

Looks like you slept with Tomas in both ways.

Havik

You’re trying to flirt with Havik? Right…how well do you think that will go for you?

Havik is not an idiot but some things go flying over his head. Using unfamiliar terms might not hit the mark. You have to be blunt essentially. But it’s hard to be blunt about wanting Havik to be your partner and asking to have sex with him. Whoever could do that is a maniac or just extremely bold. That’s not you. So the best you could do is flirt and hope it hits the mark.

You approached him as he was in the middle of looking at weapons. That mace is looking really nice to him. Whatever, you’re there now and you seem to be asking for his attention. Not literally, you were actually staring up at him until he noticed your presence.

“What?” He asked.

“I have a question for you.” You replied in a shy tone.

He fully turned his attention towards you, curious as to what you had to say considering you never got this shy before.

“So…uh…do you like sleeping?”

“…yes, why do you ask?” Don’t fuck with him. Havik has no clue what you are getting at.

“Wow, me too…we should try it together sometime.”

There was a silence that followed. A long, uncomfortable silence followed as he stared at you. His head tilted to the side a little to indicate his confusion. This might have been a failure on your part. What were you thinking? You turned around to walk away only to be grabbed by the back of your shirt by Havik. He pulled you back and held you up by your shirt. You can’t walk away after saying something so confusing to him.

“What does that even mean?” Havik interrogated you.

You didn’t want to answer him. This situation was already incredibly embarrassing for you and it doesn’t help that he wanted you to explain it to him. You begged him to forget what you said and put you down already. Havik was not gonna listen, even you knew that. He wouldn’t let you down until you told him what you meant. In a moment of chaos and stress you blurted out the truth.

“I want to have sex with you!”

I mean I would have lied but good on you for being truthful.

There was silence once more. You watched as Havik squinted his eyes. You were unsure of what he was doing until you heard him let out a dark chuckle. If his face weren’t mutilated you would be able to see that he was smiling. But since he has a permanent smile on his face it probably works out.

“Why didn’t you say so? We could do that right now.” He said with pure delight. Get to it!

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

You knew Havik was a freak but you didn’t expect him to be this freaky. Who would have thought that the first position he would pick to do you in was the mating press.

Eight inches slamming into you, damn! Of course, he was going rough. He pushed your legs back as far as they could go so he could go as deep as he could. You were already crying and panting in the first few minutes. He made sure you kept looking up at him. He wanted to see every expression you made and watch every tear slip down your face. Watching your eyes roll back every time he slammed into your g-spot made him want to devour you even more.

Havik was beyond reason. His mind was only on one thing and that was fucking your pussy. You had to stay exactly how he wanted to. Every time you tried to look away from him he grabbed your face and forced you to look at him again. He wouldn’t let go until he got a nice reaction out of you.

“Aww, what a pretty face. I wonder what face you will make when I do this?”

You felt his hand wrap around your throat. Your eyes widened as you stared up at him. The excitement in his eyes was apparent. He squeezed tighter and went rougher. With the position you were in combined with everything else he was doing; it was no shock that you ended up cumming. Strained moans left your mouth as your eyes rolled back. Drool and tears were slipping down your face. Your hands could not take Havik’s hand away from your throat. You were forced to cum on his cock as he choked the life out of you. Sounds started to grow duller but the orgasm you felt was heightened. Every stroke was felt, his dick was hitting every spot down there. You could not ignore the painful pleasure you felt. And when it seemed like you were about to pass out, he let go.

You were trying to catch your breath but it was difficult since he was still fucking you. You were catching your breath in between moans and pants that were hoarse from being choked. Luckily for you, he was close. One, two, three more thrusts and he was golden. He slammed so hard and deep inside you that you could have sworn that he hit your cervix. Havik let out this loud groan that seemed to drag out. His tongue stuck out, causing some of his saliva to drip down onto you. Oh, he was satisfied alright.

Once his little moment of nature’s pleasure was over he pulled out and immediately collapsed onto you. He wrapped his arms around your waist. Tonight, you will be his pillow. You have no choice he is too big to move. Plus he wants to stay in this position with you. You are his girlfriend now. You both had sex that’s how it goes, at least in his head that’s how it works. You heard him lightly snore away. You were happy with the outcome of your pickup line. It worked incredibly well. You slowly started to fall asleep as you held Havik in your arms.

Be careful he drools in his sleep. Wait, never mind, he’s chewing on your titty in his sleep. That’s a bigger issue. At least he does it lightly.

Rain

Ah, going after the high mage himself. It’s an interesting choice to pick a man who might have never felt the touch of a woman other than his mother.

If only you had his confidence you could be better when it comes to flirting with him. Hiding behind a pillar and watching him do magic does not count as flirting. You can talk to Rain but if you try to suggest something or flirt you freeze up. He’ll ask you if you’re alright, you’ll lie and say you’re fine before walking off, and the cycle repeats.

But maybe this time will be different. When the tournament was going on you heard in the background one of the Earthrealmers, probably Johnny, using a certain pickup line on Kitana. It seemed to work since it got a laugh out of her. So it has to work for you, right? You could only hope that this man will get it.

The next time you saw him you ran up to him with a smile on your face. Rain was delighted to see you again. You always manage to make him feel warm on the inside. You get him thinking about you instead of his studies or his duties. You’ll most likely do the same right now. The conversation is going well and you’ve made him smile. Go in for the kill!

“So…uh…do you like sleeping?” you asked awkwardly.

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion, “…yes? I would imagine everyone does.”

“Wow, me too…we should try it together sometime.”

The silence was loud.

“You have your own bed, why would you need to sleep together?”

For a smartass he sure can be a dumbass.

You were beyond crushed. Just like usual you froze up. You didn’t give Rain a chance to ask if you were okay, you walked off quickly. You left him standing there, confused and unsure if he did anything wrong.

The rest of the day went on. You stayed hidden in your room after that embarrassing fail. Rain consulted with Mileena and Kitana about what just happened. He went on and on about how he didn’t understand what you meant. He was confused about why you wanted to sleep in his bed. When Kitana asked exactly what you said Rain relayed the pickup line. In a matter of seconds, Kitana and Mileena’s faces changed. They knew what you meant. Rain saw the look they were giving him and asked what was wrong now.

“Rain,” Kitana started, “She was flirting with you.”

“She was asking to sleep with you. You know…” Mileena made the gesture with her fingers that indicated what she meant.

Computing…computing…loading…load-SEX! YOU MEANT SEX!

“By Argus, why didn’t she just say that!?” Because that’s not casual, Rain.

Rain booked it out of there, almost forgetting his water staff in the process. He was at your door in minutes. He kept banging on it with little regard for his hand. You groaned as you picked your head up from your bed. You quickly opened the door thinking there was an emergency.

“Be more direct next time.” Rain said as he pushed his way into your bedroom.

Shall we begin the party?

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

He can be an idiot at times he will admit that. Let him make it up by taking care of you.

You were facing Rain as he had you on his lap. He thrusted into you mindlessly while his mouth was occupied with your nipple. Everything about you was soft to him. He couldn’t get enough of your skin. His hands wandered all over before wrapping his arms around your waist. Occasionally his hands would move down just to get a handful of your ass. It’s too tempting how could he not squeeze it.

Your breasts were doing wonders for this man. The moment he saw them he pulled you in so he could shove his face in between them. He looked so peaceful as he sucked on your nipple. Your breasts have become his new happy place. Your fingers ran through his hair which made this more pleasurable for him. He doesn’t want this to end.

You sure were enjoying yourself. With the position you were in you were sitting right on seven inches. Seven inches that was going in and out of you at a steady rhythm. Don’t forget the fact that your clit was being rubbed every time he thrusted into you. Hell even when he took a breather and you would start grinding, your clit was getting the attention it needed. You were in a drunken daze, whimpering and pants with each thrust. It felt like his cock was reaching into your stomach. Every time he hit your g-spot you would twitch and bring his face closer to your breasts. You’re suffocating the poor man but he loves it.

Why Rain is so good at this is a mystery. A mystery you don’t care to solve you are happy with living in this cock drunken state.

This party must come to an end. You both had your fun and you couldn’t hold back your orgasm. You felt Rain’s cock twitch inside you, letting you know he was close. You made him look up at you. You saw how his eyes twinkled when he stared up at you. That look encouraged you to start kissing him passionately as the orgasm hit you both. Hot strings of cum shot into you as your pussy clenched around his cock. Both your moans were being muffled by the kiss luckily.

He held you in his arms for a while as your both caught your breath. You got off his lap and immediately collapsed onto your bed. Rain quickly came to your side and brought you in close. He had your head resting on his chest, allowing you to listen to his heartbeat. His heart was beating for you.  

What a romantic evening.  

Reiko

Going after a man who only knows war? You’re just brave at this point.

This has to be easy, right? Not many ladies are brave enough to ask out any Outworld soldier, let alone the lieutenant himself. The girls who were brave enough to ask Reiko out were either turned down or he didn’t understand what they were doing. The fact is there are no other ladies trying to go after your man. They see it as a losing game while you see it as a challenge.

You spotted him out on the training grounds with other soldiers. You ran nearby and watching from a distance as he took down his fellow soldiers. Once Reiko noticed that you were there you waved him over. He told everyone to take a quick break as he walked over to you. Once he was right in front of you he questioned why you were around and why you seemed to be waiting for him. You told him you had a question for him.

“So…uh…do you like sleeping?” you said with some confidence.

“…yes? Sleep is important to a man like me.”

“Wow, me too…we should try it sometimes.” You finished with less confidence.

“You don’t want to sleep with me.”

“Oh…” You were quiet for a bit before deciding to walk off.

His skull is too thick I fear.

Reiko stared at you before turning around. His soldiers looked at him like he was crazy. He asked them what they were looking at. They started yelling at him that he fumbled so hard. They asked if he really didn’t want to have sex with a pretty lady like you. They said Reiko was so lucky to be flirted with by you.

“Sex? She didn’t ask to have sex with me. She asked to sleep with me.” He replied.

“It’s the same thing!” They yelled back in unison.

“That’s just stupid! If she just said sex I would have said yes!” Too late, idiot!

Reiko was upset by everyone and everything. He decided to visit you once he was done training with the other soldiers. He found your home and like the weird brute he is, he climbed up to your window. You heard tapping at your window as you were getting ready for bed. You were surprised to see Reiko at your windowsill. You opened the window immediately to let him in.

“Is it really that difficult to ask for sex?” For a man like him, probably not.

You don’t need to do much to get Reiko started, your nightgown was doing the work for you.

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

Oo look how strong Reiko is. Holding you up as he fucks you against the wall, show off.

He needed to show you how much of a man he was. He’s an idiot, not a heathen who doesn’t need sex. Everyone needs a little bit of fun.

His lips were attacking your lips in a rough kiss as his body pinned your body against your bedroom wall. He held onto your legs and kept them wide open as he thrusted into you. His thrusts were angled a little to allow him to rub against your clit. When it comes to sex, Reiko gives it his all. He never wants to lack. So he’s gonna make sure this will be a night you remember.

You sure will remember. Your pussy will definitely remember and crave his cock again. You will remember how its curved shape was a glorious feeling. Combined with his thick size you won’t be needing any other man. He stretched you out that the pain was pleasurable.

Reiko is a rough lover in general so his thrusts were just as rough. All you can hear is the sound of skin slapping, wet sounds, and heavy breathing. You felt his teeth lightly biting down on your lower lip. He didn’t want to ruin your perfect lip so he moved down to your neck. His teeth sank into your soft skin, littering it with marks. Bite marks were appearing all over your neck and shoulders. Each time he marked you his tongue would run over the mark he just made.

“You’re going to look so pretty when I’m done with you. Can’t wait to see everyone’s reactions when they see that you’re my lady now.” He is such a cocky bastard.

You were loopy but were on cloud nine. The pain and pleasure were a devious combination. It’s a high. A high you could only get from Reiko. He is your drug that leaves evidence of his effects on you.

Highs have to end eventually. You started panting fast as you got closer to cumming. Reiko watched your face as he went faster. Your head went back against the wall while your eyes began to shut tight. Your lovely moans came flowing out of your mouth and into Reiko’s ears. He thought the only noise he ever liked was the sound of his enemies dying. But it seems like you’ve proven him wrong.

Your body went somewhat limp but he still held you up. He’s not done yet. He was still pounding away, feeling how your pussy grew wetting to the point it was dripping. He made you stare up at him as he kept fucking you. He wanted to watch you lose yourself more from this. The sight of your eyes growing wet from being overstimulated was delicious to him. It was enough to send him over the edge. You saw the satisfied smile on his face as his cum filled up your pussy. He was trying to shove it as deep as he could like he was trying to mark you even more.

He held you in his arms as he pulled out. His cum was dripping out of you and onto the floor. Whatever, you guys can clean it up in the morning. You both need rest after that rough session. He placed you lightly on the bed before getting in himself. He laid on his back with one arm behind his head and the other wrapped around your body. Reiko was a satisfied man. What would make him even more satisfied was if you asked to be his girlfriend. You need to be blunt when you ask that one.

Give this man a cigarette he is giving off that energy.

Yap notes: WOO DOGGY THAT WAS A LOT. Had to put my mind into it. Thank you for letting me pick I’m glad to do more of my favorite/ underrated men! It was enjoyable to write. Now I need a nap. Adiós!

[11cupids-tarot11]

A Letter From Your Future Spouse

➽───────────────❥

1 -> 4

Cupid's Services Cupid's Master List Socials

Tips appreciated!

C@sh app and P@ypal only!

$minnieplant3

@janellec03

LOVE U

- Cupid 𖥔 ࣪ ᥫ᭡ꗃ⋆࣪.

︻デ═一 ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

Pile 1- Four of Wands, The Fool, Page of Swords, Nine of Cups, Page of Wands, The Wheel of Fortune.

"Hi you! I've been sleeping a lot, can't seem to do anything else lately because of how tired I've been. Finally. I can sleep as much as I want to now because of a situation that just so happened to end recently. Death.

What now? See, I've been wondering the same thing. But let's not even worry about it, let's just sleep as much as we want to because we finally can, even if it's only a little nap time out of your day do it because I gotta see you one last time later, I've got a message for you in your dreams. Spirit will tell you, don't worry about missing it or when <3

Resting so much so when I do have to work, you know, find that balance again between work and fun, I can focus on what's so important to me a lot better, I mean really give it my all... You know? Lol

Sorry, I dream a lot, you might notice my head is always in the clouds. I have very air energy like a Gemini.

Things are finally clearing up for me! I feel at peace, maybe we mirror each other and things are also getting better for you too? You have to let me know, okay? I feel like I can finally breathe again, be optimistic without being scared the rug is going to get snatched from underneath.

I've been working so so hard on my craft, putting in so much love and effort into my work and I feel really hopeful that all of my productivity will pay off soon, consistency is key, right?

I really like the color yellow, 😄 talk again soon!"

Hope you enjoyed! Don't forget to do the poll below 👇🏾 ✨

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

Pile 2- Knight of Wands, I forgot to write down the rest of the cards I'm so sorry 😞

"I have no problem with putting in hard work for anything I want, even you, you know? If you don't want me the moment we catch eyes I'll make you ;)

The moment I catch you I'm going to make sure I never stop loving you, I'll make sure every day is beautiful, even on our bad days we'll kiss each other good night before bed still. I love you!

Why do you keep worrying yourself? All of that doubt in that pretty little head of yours isn't good, you should lay it all to rest before you make yourself sick baby. Sleep more, practice some self care before you run yourself crazy, okay?

I'm so proud of you, you know, for whatever amazing things you've accomplished lately. I believe in you, I'll always be your #1 cheerleader!

You should go out and celebrate! Enjoy the sun, you deserve it my angel! Promise me you won't let this go by like it's just not that big and you'll go out and do something? Pinky promise?

Stay focused! You're on the right path, you're doing amazing! I promise you, all of this will be worth it, it's worth our future 💓 keep going, I know you can do it! 🎉"

Hope you enjoy!!☺️ Don't forget to do the poll below!!

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

Pile 3- Queen of Cups, Justice, Four of Cups, The Moon, Three of Swords, The Star.

" Hi my love, you know I don't talk a lot haha, so I'll make this quick as usual and get out of your hair so you can go on.

I just want to remind you, you're my queen, my favorite, my whole world ❤️ I think red looks really pretty on you btw but anyway, I love and miss you like crazy at times like these.

I am going through something right now, a legal situation, a situation I wish would come to an end right now because it's so heavy on me, it's hurting me but I know at the same time it's happening to me because it's part of my karma, something that's forcing me to look so closely at myself, at every shadow because I think it leads me to you. My everything. We're going to get married, I'm so sure of it.

I'm keeping hope alive, I'm hanging on to every thread of it I've got. I'm working on everything right now, I'll catch up with you soon sweetheart 💋 I'm going to kiss you when I do, you won't be able to get rid of me. ;) "

Hope you enjoy! Don't forget to do the poll below!!

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

Pile 4- Ace of Cups, The Hanged Man, King of Wands, Nine of Cups, Knight of Cups, Nine of Wands.

"I want to come to you with amazing news but I can't, I'm sorry to say, I've taken a turn for the worst right now. Don't worry, it's temporary.

I am slowly building myself back up, that's what I'm doing right now if you're wondering what I've been doing all this time. I'm healing day by day and I hope you are too sweetheart. I might be a bit stuck and tangled up right now, but I'm clearing through it!

I'm the kind of guy who will pursue you with nothing but kindness until I make you fall for me with your charm, I'm cute, I know I am, you'll love me, I have curly light hair, and a really cute smile. You'll think I'm so adorable.

I want to offer my heart to you, fully, 100%. You have me, all of me as long as you give me you in return, I hope you do, I can't be without you once I know you.

Take care my love ❤️."

Hope you enjoyed ❤️ Don't forget to do the poll below!!

[neptuneiris]

Wild Hearts | Part Two

(the end)

pairing: prince!aemond × lowborn!reader

summary: you and he can't be together, yet the two of you have fallen for each other. but the Gods are not merciful and you both have to let go. but by comparison, your charming prince doesn't think the same way you do.

word count: 10.6k

previous part • main masterlist

hello guys, here I bring the end of this story🥺

I honestly didn't think you would like the first part so much, I received so much love and support that you truly don't know how much I appreciate it❤

you made me very happy and i hope you like this second part and final as much as the first one. i have put all my effort here so i really hope to receive your opinions, i will be waiting for them🙏🏻

and now finally read and enjoy!

Memories of the night before flood your mind, awakening sensations and emotions that spread throughout your entire being.

A shy smile appears from your lips under your sheets, blood tingeing your cheeks, unable to believe that it really happened, while a warm sensation envelops you from the inside out, with the moment more vivid and fresh than ever in your mind.

And you regret absolutely nothing.

There's not even a flicker of doubt. Even if Aemond hadn't told you that he would ask your father for your hand this very morning, you wouldn't change anything that happened.

And mostly because there is no other man you would have trusted with this, something so intimate, only him.

After you stayed a few moments longer in his chamber, when the hour grew too late, he himself led you through secret passages you were completely unaware of.

Together you slipped inside the walls of the hallways and rooms of the Red Keep, leading you to your room unnoticed.

In those dark corridors, there was more kissing and caressing, acting like complete lovers having a forbidden love and you loved every moment.

You keep every instant in your memory and in the deepest corner of your heart, as a precious and unforgettable treasure and you only hope that soon he and you can create more moments like those.

But you can no longer remember those moments as your thoughts are interrupted by your maids entering your chamber to start preparing you for the day.

So you have no choice but to get out of bed.

While you take a bath, get dressed and have your hair done, in all that time uncertainty takes hold of you, wondering at every moment how Aemond's audience with your father must go, feeling the nerves of excitement and uneasiness invade you as the waiting becomes almost unbearable.

He told you he would talk to your father this morning so surely that must be taking place right now.

And you feel that at any moment your father and mother will walk through your doors very happy and pleased by the news. And although the fact that you have given yourself to Aemond without being married or even betrothed will not be a pleasing fact nor will it be well received, still an early union will settle everything.

However, your morning passes normally and nothing out of the ordinary happens, with silence maintaining itself.

You even considered that you would not have to attend the daily activities with the ladies of the Court as you would be celebrating with your parents.

But as the minutes tick by and no one walks through your doors, you reluctantly decide to attend your engagements, having no idea what must be going on.

Despite your efforts to concentrate on activities and be present with the ladies, you are distracted by involuntary memories of Aemond and all of last night, lost in your own thoughts.

The laughter and conversations around you become a distant murmur and you are barely aware of what they are talking about.

Each passing moment seems like an eternity until, finally, one of the guards walks towards the entire group of women in which you find yourself, this only getting your attention.

"Sorry to interrupt, Ladies," the man says in a respectful tone and gesture.

"It's all right, Sr," Lady Lannister tells him.

"Lady Y/N," he turns to you and your heart stops, "Your father has requested your presence in his marital chamber along with your mother, my Lady."

Your heart begins to pound with a mixture of excitement and anticipation, keeping yourself from smiling big, holding back all your emotions as you rise from your seat.

"Excuse me," you quickly excuse yourself to them.

And with a smile and a twinkle of happiness in your eyes, you make your way towards your father and mother's room with the growing certainty that this has to do with Aemond's hearing, definitely.

So as you move through the hallways of the castle, a sense of joy and nervousness comes over you. The idea that you and Aemond will soon be married fills your thoughts.

It is also clear that your father approved of the union and your mother must be more than happy.

And as you reach the door to the chamber, you inhale deeply before entering, unable to help but smile at the thought of all that lies ahead for you and Aemond, definitely a bright future.

However, as you walk through the doors and your parents' attention is immediately focused on you, your smile is wiped from your lips the moment your mother's palm slams hard against your cheek, the pain instantly washing over you and the surprise at not expecting or even anticipating this.

The surprise and the stunned shock of the blow leave you paralyzed for a moment, unable to react, barely processing what has happened, while the pain invades you.

You bring your hands to the bruised side of your cheek, confused, shocked and in pain watching your mother back with your eyes wide open and your lips parted, beginning to breathe heavily.

"How could you?"

Your mother says to you, her voice full of reproach, disbelief and pain, watching you in horror as the room begins to fill with palpable tension.

Confusion lingers in your eyes as you try to process your mother's shock, her attitude and what she is saying to you.

"How could you be so foolish as to give yourself away like a common whore to Prince Aemond?"

She angrily inquires you, on the verge of tears, as you feel your breath catch and shock wash over you further.

"You did not think of us, not even of yourself nor did you think of your suitors and the consequences that no one will want to take you as a wife when they find out about this, you fool!"

Your mother's fury is unleashed, her dagger-like words stabbing into your chest, adding to the pain you already feel right there and also to the pain of the blow to your cheek that spreads across the entire right side of your face.

Your confusion also intensifies further at her words. And just as you try to articulate a response, feeling your throat dry and tight, your father intervenes.

"Calm down, my dear," he says to your mother, wanting to reassure her.

But despite this, the tension in the room persists, palpable like a storm threatening to erupt at any moment. And your mother's gaze, still charged with fury, turns from you to him.

"I can't stay calm after what happened! How can you be?" she exclaims, with a mixture of disbelief and anger.

Your father, trying to remain calm, approaches your mother and places a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"I understand your anger but this is not the time for this. It's all over now and we need to approach this calmly and cautiously. We also don't need to make any more scandal than will already be made," he tells her in a calm voice, though the tension lingers in his eyes.

Your mother's gaze returns to you, her eyes still reflecting the mixture of anger and concern.

"You are lucky to have such an understanding father! You don't know how ashamed I am of you Y/N, I do not know you at all. All your Septas told you, I told you, all through your education you were warned what happened to girls who allow themselves to be ruined before they are married! How is it that you could forget it so easily!?"

"That's enough."

Your father says to your mother, who lets out an incredulous snort, on the verge of hysteria, unable to believe what is happening, while you feel your heart rate increase.

And then your father also addresses you, taking the word, leaving you completely breathless.

"Were you truly naive enough to think this would be settled with the Queen and the Hand approving a marriage between you and Prince Aemond?" he questions you, his eyes reflecting a mixture of reproach and disapproval.

Realization begins to work its way through your mind, watching them back in shock and horror, your heart beating too fast and hard.

They refused.

Aemond's plan didn't work.

You and he would not marry.

"You don't know the trouble and shame you put us through, Y/N. Also yourself after Prince Aemond announced that he had taken your maidenhead, believing that so the Queen would have no choice but to marry the two of you," he tells you seriously.

The feeling of shame mixes with the pain in your chest, with surprise still in your eyes, you feel the confusion, worry, disappointment and fear all over your body.

And now it is also the sadness that settles deep inside you, wanting to wish that none of this that is happening is real.

You babble, trying to find the right words to explain yourself in the midst of all this and everything you are feeling with that lump in your throat and in your stomach, having the impression that at any moment you are going to throw up.

"B-but he told me... the Prince assured me that he would ask for my hand—

"Yes Y/N, the Prince did but the Queen and the Hand did not approve of the union."

Your father repeats to you seriously, causing more pain inside you at the news.

"Otto Hightower was furious, he and the Queen could not believe what the Prince was saying."

Confusion, despair and pain mingle with the tears that begin to stream down your cheeks, crying silently, pressing your lips together to prevent any sobs from escaping, as you feel a sharp pain in your chest that burns and hurts you inside.

It all falls on you like a painful weight on your heart, barely managing to process the magnitude of the situation.

And your father, seeing your state, with your pain and anguish, even though this was not something he expected from you and he is extremely upset and disappointed like your mother, sighs and approaches you.

"The Queen apologized to us for her son's indiscretion. And to make up for this mistake and the bad time we had to go through, she has promised us to secure a good marriage for you with Lord Ronan or Lord Alan after all," your father reveals to you as well.

The news penetrates your heart, adding additional weight to your already overwhelming emotions.

Tears continue to wet your cheeks, for although you feel a momentary relief at hearing your father's words, it is overshadowed by the heaviness of the pain that still lingers within you.

Knowing this still hurts you, completely. The news of your future marriage seeming more like a burden than a hope.

For it is not Aemond you will marry, when it was meant to be.

"The Prince instantly questioned this, he disagreed and tried to convince his mother. However, his grandsire intervened and told him that he too will soon marry Lady Baratheon. Because of his mistake, his wedding will take place in the next few days to dispel the rumors and try to make amends with his betrothed and Lord Borros by the time they find out," he explains, "Still, the boy did not agree, he was furious. And they both started yelling, but his grandfather confronted him skillfully and got him to say no more and finally accept it."

And then your heart ends up breaking into a thousand pieces.

The weight of reality looms over you and your broken heart in an overwhelming way, with the weight of disappointment and sadness is unbearable. And in the midst of all that whirlwind of pain, understanding slowly seeps into your consciousness.

Aemond, the Prince you naively sacrificed so much on, didn't fight hard enough for you.

Bitterness intertwines with your sadness at the realization. For he was only content to accept the circumstances, throwing you away to marry another man.

He could have refused, he could have even asked for support from his father, the King, who has the final say in everything. And while you understand that his life decisions are not entirely his, at least he could have done a little more.

While you would have risked everything for him, he did nothing. And with that, your mother's words settle inside your mind, accepting and acknowledging them: foolish, naive and a whore.

He said he loved you, but perhaps last night left him completely satisfied enough and that's why he decided to accept your fate and his without fight it.

A bitter resignation settles into your being, as your tears continue their silent march down your cheeks, wondering if this was his plan all along, to simply give you up after anticipating that his mother and grandfather would never have approved of the union.

For he loses nothing and in fact he did not, for he will marry Floris and when all this is known by the Court, he will not be affected by the rumors, for he is a man.

But you... you lose everything, your dignity and reputation, for being the woman.

And although your father understands the sadness that overwhelms you, he prepares to reveal more news.

"The decision about your future husband was also made at that very moment and it was Lord Ronan who accepted our and the Queen's proposal, along with the approval of his father, Lord Redwyne, in spite of everything," he announces in his slightly soft but serious tone.

And his words echo throughout the room like a final verdict.

But his words especially echo in your ears like a distant echo, as you struggle to process this news, trying to keep your posture, but you cannot.

And resignation mixes with sadness inside you.

You can only let more tears fall, unable to formulate any words, besides you have no right to fight against this.

How could you after, thank the Gods, you will still be able to get married when normally the already ruined girls don't make it?

They are doing you a favor. But still your heart continues to ache. How will it be possible to find happiness in this marriage, when your heart still yearns for someone who is no longer willing to fight for you and practically turned his back on you?

And the news doesn't end there, as your father continues to speak.

"Tomorrow at dawn, you are leaving with Lord Ronan and his family to the south, where their settlements are located, The Arbor."

He announces and your heart stop again, watching him in surprise through your tears and all your suffering face.

"There is where the wedding will take place and we will eventually travel there within the next few weeks to be present, until we manage to calm things down here and our reputation is not so affected," he lets you know.

"Father—

You try to speak with your voice completely broken, but barely the word manages to escape your lips when he won't allow you to speak.

"And there is no argument back against this," he sentences.

With your voice muffled, you don't try to say anything more, as you can't and have no right.

And in the middle of the room filled with regret, you cling to the last spark of resistance within you. Tears are still flowing from your eyes and your sadness has given way to a kind of cold resignation.

The thought of leaving for distant lands, far from what you know, adds yet another layer of complexity to the storm that is passing, as the world you know seems to be crumbling around you.

But everything is already decided.

And knowing that very soon the entire Court will learn of these unfortunate events in the name of your family, your parents lock you in your chamber, with guards guarding your doors, where your father gives the order that no one may enter or leave.

And once within the walls of your room, all alone, with your pain and humiliation, you allow yourself to cry freely and let out all your emotions, with each sob sending a pang of pain to your chest to such an extent that you don't even have tears to cry anymore.

So you can only stare at one spot in your room with your gaze lost, tears drying on both of your cheeks and your whole body aching internally.

When your gaze lands on your secret door, between hope, sadness and despair, you honestly hope he will come.

You long for him to come and explain what happened, to let you know that he has not left you alone nor did he give you up as easily as you were told. You simply wish that, that he would come and comfort you, explain, not let you go.

Yet the silence persists and your hope fades until there is no more daylight coming through your windows.

He chooses to avoid your face and a confrontation, leaving you all alone in the coldness of your room, doing nothing for you.

And you allow, completely broken and hopeless, your room to feel like a crippling prison and darkness to envelop you all around, not having the strength and courage for anything, letting the feeling of betrayal take over and accepting the cruel reality.

He has definitely betrayed you.

And at dawn, you watch as your maids pack up all your possessions, while you watch without saying or doing anything, while your father tries to get you to react, telling you that this is the best thing for everyone, but you say nothing back.

Your mother makes no attempt to talk to you, yet she is present, but this does not matter too much to you, as you are silently learning to face the consequences of your own actions and your naive decisions.

You don't even say goodbye to them. Or at least it is not an emotional farewell, as you feel nothing.

And finally you emerge from the shadows of the Keep, walking down the halls with a cold and disinterested attitude, with an expression that shows no emotion. You simply allow yourself to feel nothing more, already too hurt and humiliated to suffer any more.

In the hallways you do not cross paths with a person especially characterized by silver hair, nor with anyone else of the royal family, not even with members of the Court, simply because your father chose the right time in the morning so that you would not cross paths with anyone.

And as you reach the gates and the carriage that will take you away, you look for the last time at the high walls of the place that was once your home, with the feeling that not only are you leaving behind many people and memories, but you are also leaving behind the pieces of your broken heart.

And without looking back any further, you climb into the carriage, leaving King's Landing and everything you know behind.

And at no time did anyone try to stop you. Much less look for you.

After arriving at the Arbor Island, your past life is put on pause for the entire journey.

It was weeks of getting to know other places, especially the lands of The Reach, which are known for being supplied with water and many green areas, which was the most beautiful thing you have ever seen in your life, those roads full of green grass, tall trees and beautiful flowers of different kinds.

You witnessed all this at Rosewood and Bitterbrige, but all this was seen most especially at Highgarden, where the whole cavalry made a stop for the supply of more provisions and a short rest, where you could meet the much acclaimed Tyrell settlement.

And eventually the final stop was made at the Three Towers, where a Redwyne ship took you to the island.

And now about a moon has passed since you settled here.

Everything is absolutely green, the castle is huge with trees and rivers all around, the ocean is not far away and Lord Alan, your betrothed, does his best to make you feel at home, showing you the beauty of the landscapes and the kindness of the residents who are at his family's disposal.

He also shows you the process of making the acclaimed wines and even the military force, as the Redwyne fleet is the most powerful after the king's.

And neither of you, much less him, mentions what happened at King's Landing.

However, coming to a new place, being your new home, settling into your new chamber, being among new walls and a new exterior different from the one that surrounded you before, it brings the pain of the past. And although the place here and all that it holds is beautiful, it does not please you.

You can't fully appreciate the efforts of your future husband or even the efforts of his mother, a kind woman who is happy with your presence and gives you everything you need to make you feel comfortable.

But you are simply not happy.

Your stay here is extremely difficult for you. Sadness invades you without being able to control it and every day is a struggle to be grateful for this, to make yourself understand that you have to forget and accept, that you will never see him again.

And with time, you get used to this change. You learn to recognize the differences between your old home and the new one, even though you still can't stop comparing.

You also don't hear any news about King's Landing since you arrived, particularly from him, you don't ask because you have no interest. This more than anything else has become a haven of indifference, a barrier that you yourself have built to protect yourself.

And all it requires of your time is to familiarize yourself with the place, to spend some time with Lord Ronan and his mother, as well as to listen to the preparations for your upcoming wedding.

The whispers of the people of the Arbor, the murmurs about the union that is coming and will take place soon, where everyone will be celebrating, before all this would have filled your heart with joy and anticipation.

But now, they are just silent reminders of a past that was supposed to belong to someone else.

And the one who is most pleased and visibly excited about the wedding is your mother-to-be by law, Lady Bethany, with whom it becomes a ritual every evening to come and have tea with her.

The aroma of tea fills the terrace as you and Lady Bethany share a quiet moment. Lord Redwyne is currently in the island's harbor overseeing his fleet while Ronan is at his daily training.

The view of the green and beautiful gardens with the ocean in the background creates a serene and peaceful atmosphere, with the sound of birds and other insects enveloping you both.

Lady Bethany, elegantly dressed in a dress of warm tones, wears an elegant pearl necklace that sparkles with every movement. Her gaze, piercing and shrewd, contrasts with the serenity and gentleness in her manner, especially when it comes to you.

"I'm sure the wedding preparations have you exhausted to this point, my dear," she tells you as she holds her dainty teacup gracefully.

"No, no, not at all, my Lady," you lie, trying to make your words convincing, just like your face.

"Well, with the wedding approaching so quickly, I'd like to talk to you about a few final details."

You nod politely, holding your own cup of tea with forced elegance.

"I'm sure you'll love our Septon, it sits among many of our beautiful gardens. It's not very large but it has everything in need," she speaks with an enthusiastic tone, "I was also thinking that the feast could be held right here," she points to the beautiful garden in front of you, "It will be lovely and we have everything we need to be able to fit it in."

She continues talking, but despite the exquisite details Lady Bethany describes to you, your mind is far from the wedding preparations.

You hear what she says, but you don't pay attention to it, hearing it as a distant voice to you, echoing in your ears. You know what you are doing is wrong, rude and inappropriate, but you cannot.

You can't rejoice and enjoy this.

When suddenly, a guard approaches, interrupting the conversation with a respectful bow.

"My Lady's," he bows his head, "I apologize for the interruption."

"No problem, Sr. Stefan," Lady Bethany tells him kindly and cordially, "What has happened?"

"The seamstress has arrived, my Lady," he informs her, "She said she had an engagement with you."

"Oh!" she exclaims with a surprised face, "I quite forgot," he says as he begins to set his tea cup back on the table, rising to his feet, "My dear, I am afraid I must retire for a moment."

"It's all right, my Lady, don't worry," you assure her with a soft smile and she nods in your direction, smiling back at you.

"Very well. I'll see you at dinner time then."

You nod, keeping a soft expression as she walks away down the halls gracefully with the guard behind her.

And now being in your own company, you decide to go for a stroll through the outer corridors that offer the most breathtaking views of the gardens and the ocean stretching into the distance.

Lost in your own thoughts, you walk with your gaze lost in the horizon, when suddenly a firm hand with a certain brutality grabs you by your waist, dragging you into a lonely corner to leave you with no escape.

A stifled scream escapes your lips, as another hand is quickly placed over your mouth.

Your whole world stops for an instant, terror in your entire being, as you scream against that hand and desperately search the hallway for one of the guards, but there is not a single one in sight.

So you struggle to free yourself, screaming and shaking your whole body, but this person's hands block your every move with ease.

A shiver runs through your entire body, your breath catches and disbelief takes over.

"Shh..."

A familiar voice whispers close to your ear, where again everything inside you freezes and you open your eyes wide.

"Easy, love."

No.

This can't be.

This is impossible.

Your heart begins to pound harder, as you breathe hard through your mouth, your mind refusing to accept what is happening.

Yet you feel the familiarity of those hands, the warmth of his body against yours, feeling his breath on top of your neck and that voice... you know.

You know deep down inside that it really is him.

And the fact is further confirmed the moment he brings his lips to your ear to speak softly to you.

"I'm going to remove my hand now but first I want you to promise that you won't shout or make any fuss, understood? Let's not complicate things, love."

The words barely reach your ears as you process the strange reality of the situation, feeling like your heart will burst out of your chest at any moment as tears begin to form in your eyes.

"Now nod if you have understood," he tells you with a tone of authority.

And in the midst of confusion, surprise, disbelief and everything else you're feeling, your head nods involuntarily, unsure.

"Good girl," he coos in your ear.

You feel the tension in your shoulders and can feel the vibration of his words through your body as he slowly removes his hand from your mouth, letting the air fill your lungs again.

And finally, he gently turns you so that you are both facing each other, his gaze eventually meeting yours.

He's wearing a hood with a cloak that wraps around his face, figure, and also perfectly hides his characteristic silver hair. And somehow, the dark of his clothes slightly camouflages the patch covering his left eye.

The shadow of the hood slips subtly over his facial features, adding a mystery to his presence. And to the side of his hip, his long sword hides between his cloak and body, revealing a bit of his hilt.

You can feel the whirlwind of emotions inside you, from surprise to sadness to anger, as his gaze intensifies, staring at you, his expression hard to decipher.

He is truly here, standing in front of you.

And the air seems to stop for a moment, as if the whole world is suspended by this unexpected encounter. The physical proximity between the two of you is obvious and not because you want it that way, but because the surprise leaves you paralyzed and you can't believe it.

Until finally he speaks.

"There you are," he murmurs with a barely visible smile on his lips, "It took me a while to get here."

It took him a while to get here?

You repeat in your mind, flooded with conflicting emotions, surprise, sadness and anger. How can he be here, after everything that happened? And why just now?

"What are you doing here?" you ask almost in a whisper, your voice completely broken, feeling tears stream down your cheeks, a reaction that takes him by surprise.

"I came for you, of course," he says, placing one of his hands on your waist again and the other on your cheek, wiping away your tears with his thumb, watching you confused and attentive, "Why are you crying?"

I came for you.

The thought leaves you speechless, with his presence and closeness seeming almost intoxicating to you, not bearing it, trying to process the reality of his presence.

And the tears in your eyes reflect the mixture of pain and sadness you feel at that moment.

And finally, not knowing where exactly you take the strength from, as you feel completely weak, you let go of his grip and take a step back with your gaze lowered, an action that Aemond doesn't expect and completely confuses him.

And he receiving no response from you, he acts, ignoring that gesture of yours for the moment, aware that he can't waste any time.

"We should leave before anyone sees us," he mutters, averting his gaze to the hallways to make sure no guards are approaching, attentive and fully alert, "Now."

You, however, stand still, unmoving at his proposal, his words floating in the air and echoing in your ears, creating a palpable tension around you.

"Come."

He says to you, taking your arm, trying to pull you forward along with him. But, again, you don't move and this gets his attention, beginning to get desperate.

"Y/N," he calls to you in a demanding, serious tone.

"No," you finally say, trying to hear yourself firm, breathing hard, "I-I can't," you falter, once again releasing yourself from his grip, not even looking him in the eye, nervousness, confusion and fear taking hold of you, "Leave me alone."

You try to pull away from him, but he stops you, surprised by your words, his gaze reflecting the mixture of disbelief and concern.

"Please Y/N, there's no time for explanations now," he insists, "We need to leave," he begs, pulling your body closer to his, anxiety rising in you as he looks at you intently, "I promise I'll explain and tell you everything, everything you want to know when we leave here."

"I can't leave. I have commitments here," you sentence in the midst of all your pain, trying to look strong.

And once again you loosen your grip on him and try to pull away from him, which ends up wearing his patience thin.

"Oh yes?"

You hear the mockery in his tone behind you and once again, he stops you and grabs you by the waist, gluing your body to his.

"And you think I care about that?" he murmurs dangerously close to your face, watching you defiantly, stealing your breath, "I've already come this far and you're wrong if you think I'll leave empty handed."

Despite the closeness and the threat in his words, you maintain your stance and the next words escape your lips with a firmness that surprises even yourself.

"This is a mistake, Aemond. You shouldn't even be here. You can't take me away."

Aemond watches you in frustration, letting out a sigh, but also having a determination on his face.

"You don't understand—

"No, I do understand," you interrupt him with a lump in your throat, "I understood perfectly when you left me alone and did nothing when they decided to send me away after you fuck me."

If there is pain in your words and the cruel reality of them, you don't show it and again free yourself from his grip, which in all your attempts are successful, but he immediately grabs you again with renewed firmness, seeking to make you understand, as if he can fix everything with his presence.

"I told you I'll explain everything when—

"And that makes ten."

He is interrupted now by a third voice also familiar between the two of you, that person appearing doubling down the hallway you are in, just ahead of you.

And before you or Aemond can worry and even act, good and bad, this does not happen, as for like him, Aegon Targaryen has a hood and cloak on, hiding his hair and identity.

And without showing the slightest concern, he drags an unconscious guard away with all his might.

"Hey," he says with all the normality in the world when he notices you both, dropping the man's legs with a subtle thump, "I hope he wakes up soon," he comments with a spark of mockery in his tone, observing you and then his brother with a grin, "Good, you finally found her. Now can we go? This playing princes to the rescue is exhausting. I'm not drunk enough for this, I need to drink."

Aemond lets out a sigh and looks at him reproachfully, not letting you go.

"I told you to be discreet when you have to do that."

"That's what I'm doing," he defends himself, "But this man is heavier than the others and I had to drag him," he says and then kicks him gently in the side of his stomach.

Aemond rolls his eye.

"And I think the other guards already noticed. We need to leave now," he adds, more serious.

He then picks up a sack hanging over his shoulder, tossing it to Aemond, who nimbly catches it in mid-air and opens it, pulling out another hood just like the one the two of them have and holds it out to you with an expectant, menacing look.

"Now... do I take you with me the good or the bad way?"

Aemond holds the hood in his hand, waiting for your answer and what you are going to do, but you in the midst of confusion and pain, also seeming too much like even Aegon is here, helping him, still try to reason with him.

"Aemond, this is wrong," you plead, "Our families will be furious and this will become a huge problem if you take me with you."

He looks at you, his expression showing no remorse, brushing past your words, not caring.

"Very soon, the guards and surely your dear Ronan will surround us," he begins to tell you in a low tone and in warning, "And you don't want me to hurt him again, do you?" he inquires you coldly, "This time I will not be merciful but if you come with me for good, I will allow him to live."

His words hit you like a bucket of cold water, looking at him completely shocked and horrified, unable to believe it, with the reality of danger taking hold of you.

"I've already made a huge problem out of this by simply coming here, Y/N. Of course my family has figured out because Vhagar and Sunfyre left DragonPit. And believe me I'm not going to mind getting my hands more dirty."

The mention of Ronan is like a dagger stabbing into your chest, reminding you of the implications and the risk Aemond is willing to take.

And it's not fair.

Ronan doesn't deserve it.

He's been nothing but kind and supportive to you, always every moment you were in his company being supportive and wanting to make you feel comfortable, visibly excited and happy every time he showed you his home and what he's so characteristic of.

And while there is also the fear of the consequences of these actions, you feel more of an urgency to protect Ronan, because you will never forgive yourself if something bad happens to him because of you, much less him dying.

"You decide," Aemond says to you, snapping you out of your thoughts.

"Brother, we have to go now," Aegon announces worriedly, peering intently down one of the corridors, alert.

And there you know.

You press your lips together, don't let any more tears fall and resigned, with your jaw clenched, you practically snatch the black cloaked hood out of his hand and take a couple of steps forward, not wanting to watch him, instantly putting it around your dress and also over your head, hiding your hair.

The tension between him and you is evident and once you finish, he again grabs your arm.

"Let's go," he says to both of you.

Aegon leads the way, and the three of you without wasting any more time enter the huge gardens, instantly with bushes and trees covering you. And as the three of you make your way through the leaves, you hear the sound of them and the rustle of branches with every movement.

And though Aemond guides you, your thoughts are filled with more and more worries and unanswered questions as you go along, anticipating the enormous trouble and scandal this escape is going to bring when your family and Aemond's family finds out.

And behind you, you hear the sound of guards and commotion beginning to be made in the castle, reporting the intruders.

"Now, now, now," Aegon hurries.

Aemond makes you run faster and soon the three of you reach the edge of the island, making your way through the white sand, where you make out a small boat waiting on the seashore, hidden among logs and large palm fronds.

The two brothers quickly push it into the water without much effort, where Aemond hurries you up, instantly wetting the edges of your dress, though it is of no matter.

And once the three of you are up, the two of them take the oars and start pushing the waters.

"This shit is the only thing I didn't like about all this," Aegon says grumpily, making force.

You suppose that having flown the dragons to the island would have been dangerous and the guards would have given the warning before the two of them could have even entered the castle.

So you look back to see if anyone is following them and fortunately they are not, relieving and saddening you at the same time.

The distance from the island to The Reach lands is fortunately short, so you soon approach the shore, to a smaller, unguarded harbor where there are two men watching them as you approach, this alerting you but not alerting the two Targaryen brothers at all.

And once you reach the shore, Aegon is the one who helps you out of the small boat, and then thanks the two men, who take the boat and you see how they have more boats set up in this harbor with oars and fishing nets, so you assume they are fishermen.

And then it is Aemond who approaches them.

"Thank you very much," he tells them and then holds out a small sack to each of them, clearly filled with coins.

"It has been a pleasure, my Prince," one of them replies.

And he turns his attention back to you.

"Come," he says, taking your arm again, making you walk.

You don't really know where you are, but you can guess what the city of the Three Towers is, only that the three of you are in a less frequented part of the city.

And with Aegon again leading the way, soon enough you see the dragons hiding behind a small dune, near the harbor, where the great immensity of Vhagar surprises you and makes Sunfyre look extremely small beside him.

You never had the privilege of flying in Vhagar before but today looks like it will be the day.

Aegon turns to Sunfyre and as you and Aemond approach the great dragoness, Aemond says some words to her in High Valyrian that you don't understand, but the imposing figure of her makes you feel intimidated and clearly frightened, especially the moment her huge eyes inspect you after Aemond says those words to her.

"Easy, she's not going to hurt you," Aemond tells you, taking your hand.

Vhagar lets out a short roar in the direction of both of you and that makes you startle.

"Don't be afraid. It's all right," he assures you, leading you with him towards the nets to climb up and mount it.

And you have no choice but to comply.

Aemond and Aegon avoid flying over the lands where the news will come faster where two dragons were seen together in the skies.

Instead, they choose to fly over a part of Dorne and reach the lands of Storm's End, where they are characterized by bad weather, icy winds, heavy rains and thunderstorms, so both brothers decide to stop at Mistwood so that, more than anything else, the dragons can rest.

Throughout the flight with Aemond you made no effort to talk and fortunately neither did he.

At first being in the skies in such a large dragon made you experience a completely unfamiliar sensation that you had never felt before, with mixed emotions, excitement being the strongest of all.

It was simply something unique to you and that you can't quite describe, but it made you forget for a moment about everything that was happend.

Aemond couldn't help the smile on his face when he saw that expression on your face, understanding very well what you were feeling, feeling good after so many weeks, calm and at peace, finally having you in his arms.

He couldn't help but watch you with that adoration, even though he knew there was still something missing in all of this.

Eventually you began to get used to the sensation of flight and you start to feel nervous and uncomfortable as you feel Aemond's body touching yours, as he practically has you locked in his arms.

But finally that ends, for now, as the three of you make a stop due to exhaustion and bad weather.

The three of you seek shelter in a tavern where they also offer temporary lodging. There aren't many people when the three of you enter, just a few men drinking and two women refilling their drinks, while there's an old man behind a piece of wooden furniture.

"How can I help you?"

"Do you have rooms available?" asks Aemond.

"Yeah," he says as he notices the poor keys hanging on the wall behind him.

"I'll stay here for a while," Aegon says suddenly, "I need a drink or I swear I'll go mad."

"You can drink in the room," Aemond tells him reproachfully, "I'm not going to stay up all night making sure you're all right and don't get into any trouble."

"Fine, as you wish," Aegon replies to him raising his hands in surrender.

"So how many rooms, boy?" the man asks.

You swear he is about to say two, but perhaps he could have sensed the discomfort and tension emanating from your body. And then he lets out a long breath.

"Three rooms, please."

You internally thank him, feeling instantly relieved, as he makes the payment.

One of the women leads you to the rooms, and you enter yours without addressing a word to any of the brothers, desperately needing to be alone and give yourself a time, as well as take a bath.

Fortunately no one bothers you and you only require the help of the woman from before to fill the bathtub with warm water. And she also kindly provides you with dry clothes while you let your rain-soaked dress dry by the warmth of the fireplace.

Then you watch the rain fall through the small window as you stand near the fire, when there is a soft knock on your door. And before you can answer, the door opens and Aemond enters the room, watching you intently.

You press your lips together and lower your gaze, pretending to be occupied with something in your hands.

"Are you all right?" he asks you softly and attentively, keeping a respectful distance.

"Yes," you answer briefly and without emotion, only hearing between the two of you the creaking of wood and the rain outside.

"Do you need anything?"

"No."

He lets out a long breath and guessing from this, he must look tired and frustrated, to which you decide not to take any notice and continue without looking at him, wanting to be alone.

"If you need anything or anything happens, I'll be next door."

You don't say anything, just bite the inside of your cheek and wait for him to finally leave.

"Sleep well," he says in a defeated voice then walks away and closes the door.

At dawn and practically at first light, the three of you resume your flight back to King's Landing.

The three of you approach Vhagar and Sunfyre, who are not far from the tavern, hidden in the forest among huge and frightening trees. Aegon mounts his dragon first, and again Aemond helps you scale Vhagar's massive size, standing behind you at all times and making sure you don't fall.

And with a mighty flapping of wings, the two dragons take to the sky with flight towards the horizon.

And while it was impossible not to think that the flight with Aemond would be uncomfortable again, you still hoped that things between him and you wouldn't feel so tense.

However, that's exactly what happens.

Practically your back is against his chest, his arms on either side of your waist to take the reins and every now and then you feel his warm breath on the back of your neck which, without knowing exactly why, sends shivers all over your body and makes you uncomfortable.

Being with him like this only relives the first and last time you both spent the night together in your mind and you want to take your distance, which is impossible. And it also relives the pain.

What happened the next morning makes the whole memory painful and overshadows all the happiness you felt at the time.

And in the midst of everything you're feeling, wishing this would end soon, Aemond suddenly breaks the silence between the two of you.

"They never told me," he murmurs in your ear, tensing your body the instant you hear him.

His words leave you bewildered. You don't understand what he's referring to, but you don't decide to ask either. And in the silence that follows, Aemond continues.

"They never told me they would send you away the next day."

This makes your heart flip and involuntarily this catches your attention, not daring to say anything, let alone turn your head to watch him, but feeling the intrigue inside you.

"After everything that happened in the Council Chamber, I had a plan."

He confesses to you and your breath catches at that moment.

"I wanted to keep my mother and grandsire off guard by making them think I had agreed to their terms. And I didn't look for you all that day because I was planning, that at the right time, I would come for you with the help of Aegon and Helaena and we would marry in secret at the Septon."

The impact of his words resonates within you, creating surprise and disbelief in your thoughts, as you feel your heart begin to beat too hard and you begin to breathe through your mouth.

"But I didn't know that, besides trying to see you would be too risky and would only delay things more, so I focused on preparing a discreet escape," he continues with his tone relieving his vulnerability, "And when Hel didn't see you with the ladies or anywhere else, she told me and I got worried. I tried to look for you, but before I knew it, you were gone."

You bite the inside of your cheek as tears begin to form in your eyes and you process the revelation of his words that envelopes you in a sense of overwhelming emotions, shock, disbelief and sadness.

"I couldn't do anything against it and my plan fell apart," he admits, in his voice mixing regret and frustration, "I had hoped to be able to explain you, to take you as my wife and protect you from everything that would come after, because being wed no one could separate us anymore. But, as always, nothing went as I expected and I failed."

The surprise fades and leaves room for sadness and regret, as silence stretches between the two and only the sound of the wind and the flapping of Vhagar's huge wings can be heard.

With the unexpected revelations, Aemond's words float in the air and for a moment you find yourself lost in the feeling of your emotions, with tears streaming down your cheeks, with the feeling of regret and frustration, realizing the complexity of the situation now and then.

You still can't watch him, even though you feel Aemond tilt his head over one of your shoulders, wanting to watch you, but you don't let him. And now it is you who dares to break the silence with a shaky question.

"Did you get married?" you ask, tears still sliding down your cheeks.

"No, Y/N. I never did."

You instantly frown, not understanding.

Your father that very day told you that Aemond was to be wed soon, but not to you. Besides, the Queen and the Hand seemed very serious about making amends with Lord Borros and Floris Baratheon, so the wedding must have taken place, definitely.

"But... my father told me that day..." you swallow hard, " That your wedding to Lady Floris would take place in the next few days."

Aemond sighs and you can feel the heaviness in his reply.

"Yes, but I did everything I could to delay that wedding and eventually... it never happened."

You are silent for a moment, breathing through your mouth.

"And what happened?" you ask in a shaky voice.

"Two days ago the wedding finally took place but Aegon helped me escape the Keep to come for you."

Aemond's words clutch at your heart and disbelief along with surprise intertwine within you as you try to process the magnitude of the words he has just revealed, leaving you breathless. Even you can't describe exactly what you feel.

He abandoned his family.

He did not fulfill his duty... for you.

Surprise mixes with relief in your emotions, but uncertainty also arises. And finally, your eyes desperately seek his, needing him to confirm that what he is telling you is no lie.

His gaze seeks yours for understanding and support, being terribly honest with you. And in the midst of all his remorse and determination, a faint sad smile forms on his lips, in your direction.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, insistent and pleading, "I truly didn't know you'd be sent away the next day and had I known..." he sighs, averting his gaze from yours for the burden of the situation and denies with his head, "I thought my plan would work."

You can't say anything, you don't even know what exactly you feel about all this as Aemond stands there, sadness and determination in his gaze, waiting for your reaction.

But you can't think clearly, you can only look away from him and stare straight ahead, your lips parted.

You still feel shocked, but now you understand the depth of the sacrifices he has made, something you had no idea of. How could you have known that he, for you, had abandoned his duty even considering the grave consequences he will soon have with his family?

When you first saw him on the island, you thought he was married to Floris and only wanted to take you for his selfish whim. But now, you understand everything.

And yet the words get stuck in your throat as you struggle to articulate a response, sadness reflecting in your eyes and you don't even know what to do, unable to fully articulate your thoughts and feelings.

When he again speaks, breaking the silence.

"Do you still hate me?" he asks you softly and with some fear.

His tone carries with it uncertainty and he gives you your full attention, as you take a moment before responding, trying to find the right words for everything you're feeling at that moment.

"I don't know," you confess, in a low murmur, not daring to look at him, "It's too much... all of this is too much."

He nods sympathetically, understanding everything you must be feeling. And, a little unsure at first, he lifts one of his hands slowly, as if afraid that any sudden movement might break the calmness of the situation and then his fingers gently touch your cheek, caressing you slowly, turning your face very carefully towards his.

And there he is again, seeing his beautiful violet eye and unconsciously, his touch and closeness comfort you.

"I just want you to know that every choice I made was in the hope that we could finally be together, as husband and wife," he tells you sincerely.

And again you close your eyes and let the tears roll down your cheeks and he wipes them away, hating to see you cry, not liking that sight but doing his best to ease your pain, even though he is the cause.

"At least you could have let me know what you were planning... in one way or another," you say sadly, "You truly hurt me that day and I felt so... used and broken."

"I know, I know, I'm sorry," he says instantly, sad and remorseful, "I'm very sorry, my sweet girl. I promise you that was never my intention. I never thought badly of you, nor was it my wish for you to marry someone else. When I was told that I was furious, Y/N. Especially because I couldn't say anything about it. And when I found out you were gone... I swear I felt I was going to go mad."

You notice the sincerity of his confession and let out a long breath, as Aemond releases the reins with his free hand and holds it at your waist, hugging you. And then he rests his forehead against the side of your head, then leaves soft, comforting kisses on your left cheek.

And despite the discomfort of the position you find yourself in, you turn your body as best you can and seek refuge in his arms, close your eyes and feel the warmth emanating from his body instantly.

His fingers begin to trace gentle circles on your back above your cloak, seeking to bring you comfort and understanding.

Tears continue to slowly stream down your cheeks as he holds you against his body, the difference being that you no longer feel that weight on your being and feel relief instead.

You sigh deeply as Aemond's fingers now gently caress your head, until you finally feel good and separate yourself enough from him to look into his eye.

But you say nothing, just tilt your head towards him and the two of you bring your foreheads together, as Vhagar continues the course of the flight and Sunfyre keeps flying by a few more clouds above.

"Are you all right?" he asks you softly and you nod.

You close your eyes and look straight ahead again, dropping your head between his chest and shoulder with a relieved gesture, to which he can more easily enclose you in his arms.

"Yes," you murmur, then look around briefly.

It's impossible to tell where you are from this height, mostly because you're unfamiliar with the skies, so you decide to ask.

"How close are we to King's Landing?"

You wait for him to respond by telling you that they are flying over the name of some land and give you an approximate of how long until they both arrive at the place where chaos will once again be unleashed by the actions of both of you.

However, you don't expect that kind of answer at all.

"We are not flying into King's Landing."

Instantly you raise your face to him in complete bewilderment.

"I'm going to take you somewhere else."

"Where to?" you ask completely attentive.

Aemond doesn't say anything right away, just lets the wind wrap around you both for a moment as your unease envelops you and you continue to watch him waiting for an answer.

"To Dragonstone."

He finally says and another pause hangs in the air as you raise your eyebrows, still not fully comprehending, when his gaze meets yours, as if he is searching for some clue in your eyes before he continues.

"That's where we're getting married."

Total surprise takes hold of you, your mouth half opens but no words come out and for an instant, nothing comes to your mind to make you react.

Aemond watches your reaction, fearful of what your expression might reflect. And the uncertainty in his gaze mixes with fear as he watches you completely attentively.

"You still want to marry me?" he asks.

His question hangs in the air, as time seems to fade around you and a wave of thoughts invade your mind, surprise and trepidation, deeply understanding his intentions.

Uncertainty is still present, but a spark of longing begins to glow in your eyes.

Aemond eagerly awaits your response, his watchful gaze searching for any expression in yours. And there you see how his own burden of desire and waiting for your acceptance is there.

Then you feel a surge of warmth in your chest.

And finally a small smile forms on your lips, and then you slowly lean into him, closing the distance between you, and press your lips gently on top of his.

It is your silent response, but full of meaning.

And at this, Aemond relieves, feeling the certainty of your choice, while his arms hold you tenderly, as if he fears this is a cruel dream, responding to your kiss with as much warmth and touch as possible.

The wind fiddles with your hair as the majestic flapping of Vhagar's wings engulfs them, heading towards Dragonstone with a great and promising purpose.

And soon both dragons find themselves landing on the island, where Princess Rhaenyra, Princess of Dragonstone, resides with her family.

At Dragonstone, Rhaenyra and Daemon Targaryen, along with several other guards, immediately emerge from the black castle with confused, distrustful and curious gazes.

Aemond is the one who takes the word, addressing Rhaenyra, but it is Daemon who responds and very soon they find themselves having an intense discussion. It is Daemon who proclaims that neither of them have any place on the island and that they should not be here.

Aegon and Aemond argue with this, trying to talk to Rhaenyra mainly, but Daemon always vouches for her. Until finally Rhaenyra speaks and listens to the request of her two half-brothers.

Despite the clear rivalry between the two families of the very ill King Viserys, for Rhaenyra that they, especially Aemond, have thought of her to ask for her help with matters of the heart and not politics, speaks to her.

Despite the accident at Driftmark, a night Rhaenyra later spent a lot of time thinking about, she understands that from the beginning, since she and Alicent were little girls, the problem was always with Otto Hightower and his persuasive ideas on Crown decisions.

And when Rhaenyra agrees to help them, Aemond thinks that this is not the acceptance of forgiveness, it is just her half-sister doing him a favor she owes him for that terrible night, where Luke received no punishment.

Besides, there is no time to remember past events, the only thing he cares about is marrying you as soon as possible.

Daemon reproaches and questions his wife's decision, but she decides not to listen to him. She simply wants peace to finally exist between her father's two families and in the Realm.

Rhaenyra provides Aemond and you with everything you need. Even the robes, the dragonglass, the chalice and she also offers to officiate the union for lack of a Septon at the time.

And then... finally the Valyrian wedding takes place amidst the ancestral stones of Dragonstone.

The wind caresses your faces, as if the ancient dragons and the ancient Gods were present, blessing this special moment. You and Aemond stare at each other, face to face, with Aegon as your witness, as Rhaenyra recites the words in High Valyrian.

"Hen lantoti ānogar."

Blood of two.

"Va sȳndroti vāedroma."

Joined as one.

The blade cuts the lips of both, then both collect the blood with their thumbs and place it as a circle on each other's foreheads.

"Mēro perzot gīhoti."

Ghostly flame.

"Elēdroma iārza sīr."

And song of shadows.

"Izulī ampā perzī."

Two hearts as embers.

Then the two cut the palm of each other's hand, join them together and let the blood run into the chalice between your bodies.

"Prūmī lanti sēteksi."

Forged in fourteen fires.

"Hen jenȳ māzīlarion."

A future promised in glass.

The two drink from each other's blood.

"Qēnlossa ozūndessi."

The stars stand as witness.

"Sȳndroro ōñō jēdo."

The vow spoken through time.

"Rȳ kīva mazvestraksi."

Of darkness and light.

And finally, the Valyrian wedding is culminated and permanently sealed as the sun sets over Dragonstone and Aemond's lips claim yours in a passionate and needy kiss, with both of you tasting the faint taste of each other's blood on your lips.

And only then and there, the two of you are finally happy, this being what you had so longed for and hoped for, long ago giving it up for lost. But now, he can call you his wife and you call him your husband.

Eventually the news reaches King's Landing, unleashing a new wave of worry and trouble, but now both you and Aemond are at ease, for no one can separate you now, let alone discredit a Valyrian wedding.

And you both consummate the marriage under the moonlight reflecting off Dragonstone, joining as one, as it was meant to be, long ago.

taglist next part:

@a-beaverhausen

[suashii]

୨♡୧ WINDOW TO THE SOUL — dad!gojo. sfw. fluff. i can't stop thinking about papa gojo so pls accept this little blurb :3

“satoru.” you mean for your voice to come out firm but even you can hear the smile behind it. you don’t blame yourself though—how could you not smile at the sight before you?

something about seeing gojo with a baby in his hands seems natural. she’s tiny in his arms, like a fragile glass figure. and even though gojo satoru is the strongest man you know, there’s no chance he’d possibly ever break her. he’s made sure of that much and you can see the promise in his gaze as he stares down at your daughter. when he answers your call, he doesn’t even bother to look in your direction. “hmm?”

“you have to let her sleep.” you keep your voice low but it makes little difference in lulling the girl to sleep when gojo is doing everything in his power to keep her awake. he’s been doing this a lot since you brought the baby home from the hospital a couple months ago, though, you haven’t been able to put your finger on his reasoning behind it. despite his efforts, the little one always drifts off eventually, so you simply drink in the father-daughter time shared between the two of them.

gojo hears you, and he knows you’re right—it’s getting late and her little eyelids are beginning to flutter sleepily, but he can’t help but let his lithe fingers run up and down her chubby cheeks. the soft touch leads to a toothless smile and satoru swears he can see a sparkle twinkle in her eyes as she looks up at him.

it’s moments like these that continuously tempt him to keep the little girl up just a little longer. she makes him believe that eyes are truly the window to the soul because all he sees in hers is unconditional love. no requirements, no expectations, no limitations—just pure, unadulterated love. 

satoru never could have imagined he would feel the most worthy in the eyes of a baby.

he cherishes the scene while he can—before she falls asleep for the night, before she grows up and the shiny sparkle in her eye begins to dull with time. he wants to hold onto this little piece of his baby girl for as long as he possibly can.

all too soon, her wispy, white eyelashes are brushing the tops of her cheeks and the girl is off to dreamland. satoru presses a feather-light kiss to his little lady’s forehead and whispers a quiet “goodnight” against her skin.

“you really have a hard time parting with her, huh?” your soft voice sounds from the opposite side of the couch.

it’s only when he looks up and meets your gaze that gojo realizes his daughter’s eyes are a reflection of your own. there are two people in the world who will love him no matter what.

thanks for reading! consider commenting or reblogging if you enjoyed ❤︎

[silviakundera]

when it comes to subtext-only couples (romantic couples in TV/film that are not explicitly canon), there many reasons that these ships can very appealing to watch and can be compelling & fulfillingly romantic for the viewer, despite no overt sexual contact and no out-loud declaration of a relationship....

but one of the biggest draws for me is all of the effort put into communicating what cannot be said. all of the work put into saying without words or an on screen kiss, we are in love! You as the viewer need to be made to FEEL that love. There are no shortcuts or easy way out. They can't just tell without showing.

When a writer, an actor believes in that unspoken love and build it into their performance, when people work together to create a subtext ship, when they put thought into it and pay attention to all the details.... 👌👌👌👌

This can apply to many ships that aren't permitted explicit canon expression (including het ships that aren't Approved™ but the actors and script writer believe in)... but of course what comes most to my mind lately are the censored chinese gay dramas and how the creative team is putting their whole pussy into it like SIR. WOW. THE DEDICATION TO ROMANCEEEE

The Spirealm is the latest example where I keep thinking holy shit, the devil works hard but these actors are working harder. They are so fucking good at portraying a love story without saying it's a love story. It's like The Untamed for me all over again.

It's how everyone is working together: the writer included those beats & that allusion, the actor used that microexpression & body language, the director used that blocking and created the space for it, the editor included all the right shots and pauses on the actor's attraction/affection/love so it isn't lost in the shuffle of the plot. It's a symphony of a ship that's performed in concert.

This is something every quality romantic drama needs to include, but when you're working with subtext it's 50x harder and takes so much more care & consideration.

[baelabong]

ʜᴏᴡ ʟᴏɴɢ

(ʏᴜɴᴊɪɴ x ꜰᴇᴍ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ) ᴀɴɢꜱᴛ

plot: yunjins been cheating. but she didn’t mean it … right?

notes: toxic yunjin, dumbass y/n again, istg guys the only things that gain attention iz my karina and winter fics 💔💔

you sit on the couch, your phone clutched in your hand, staring at the screen, waiting for yunjin's name to pop up. it doesn’t. hours pass, and the ticking of the clock feels like a taunt. where is she? you tell yourself it’s nothing—she’s probably stuck at practice or maybe went out with the girls, but that nagging feeling in your chest grows heavier. it’s been too long.

finally, you hear the door creak open. she stumbles in, not her usual put-together self. she looks messy, worn-out. the smell of alcohol hits you before she even speaks. when she does, her voice is low, slurred.

"hey, baby," she tries to smile, but it doesn't reach her eyes. her gaze is distant, foggy, like she's not really here with you.

"where have you been?" you ask, trying to sound casual, but the hours of waiting twist your voice with anxiety. you hate sounding paranoid, but you can't help it anymore.

"just out with the girls. practice ran late… then drinks," she mumbles, her words stumbling out, as if she’s trying to get past them quickly.

you get up, moving closer, searching her face for something, anything, that makes sense. but her eyes—they’re empty, evasive. "why didn’t you answer my calls?"

"didn’t hear it," she shrugs, still avoiding your gaze. "too loud, i guess."

it's weak. her excuses always are. and it's not just the excuse, it's the way she says it—like she doesn’t care enough to make it believable. your stomach twists, a cold knot forming. there’s more to this, you can feel it.

"yunjin, what’s going on?" you ask, your voice wavering despite your effort to stay calm. you’ve been through this too many times to ignore the signs.

she sighs, running a hand through her hair. for a second, her tough front slips, and she looks at you, really looks at you. "i... i messed up."

your heart stops. "what do you mean?"

"i was drunk, and... i kissed someone else."

her words are like a punch to the gut, knocking the breath out of you. you take a step back, needing space to think, but your mind is spinning. "you kissed someone?"

"it didn’t mean anything," she rushes, stepping toward you, but you back away again. "it was just a stupid, drunken mistake. i swear, it only happened once."

the room feels too small now, the walls closing in. you trusted her. after everything, you trusted her, and she... "how long has this been going on?"

"what? no, i told you, it was just once—"

"how long, yunjin?" your voice is louder now, anger bubbling up. you don't want to be the fool who believed her lies for too long.

she hesitates, her eyes darting away for a moment before coming back to you. "just once," she insists, but the doubt in her eyes says otherwise. "i was drunk. it meant nothing."

you want to believe her. god, you want to believe her so badly. but the way she's been acting lately—distant, secretive—there’s more to this.

"i deserve the truth," you say, your voice shaky but firm. you’re done playing this game.

she steps closer, softening her expression like she’s trying to lure you back in. "baby, you’re overthinking this," she coos, her voice sickly sweet, the kind that used to comfort you but now just makes you feel uneasy. "it was a mistake. everyone makes mistakes."

"but you didn’t tell me," you push back, feeling a flicker of anger spark in your chest. "you hid it from me."

"because i knew you’d overreact," she snaps, her patience thinning. "you always do this. you always assume the worst."

her words sting, making you question yourself. am i overreacting? was it just a one-time mistake? you’ve been second-guessing yourself so much lately, it’s hard to tell anymore.

yunjin’s close now, her eyes locked on yours, her voice dropping lower, more intimate. "you know i love you, right?"

"yeah, but—"

she cuts you off, cupping your face in her hands. "i love you," she whispers, her thumb brushing over your cheek, her touch soft but with an underlying tension. "you’re the one i come home to. don’t let something this small ruin us."

her words start to blur the lines in your mind. maybe it’s not as big of a deal as it feels. maybe you are overthinking. she’s here, isn’t she? but then, the memory of all those nights alone, waiting, wondering—those doubts flare up again.

"yunjin, i can’t just forget this," you murmur, feeling the weight of it all pressing down on you. "you hurt me."

for a moment, her eyes harden, just for a second, before she puts on a sad, almost pitying smile. "i know, and i’m sorry," she says, but her voice feels insincere, dripping with mockery. "but you need to stop being so paranoid. it was one kiss. do you really think i’d throw everything away for that?"

your mouth opens to respond, but she silences you, pressing a finger to your lips. "shh, don’t ruin this," she whispers, stepping even closer, her body pressing against yours. "we’re good together. you know that."

her other hand trails down your arm, sending shivers through your skin. you should push her away. you should be angry, but instead, her closeness overwhelms you, clouding your thoughts.

"just let it go," she murmurs before pulling you into a kiss, one that’s not soft or reassuring. it’s possessive, controlling, like she’s forcing you to forget everything else.

and somehow, it works. the fight drains out of you as her lips move against yours, your mind going blank. you forget the pain, the doubt, the questions. it’s just her now, her hands on you, her breath mixing with yours, until all you can feel is her.

when she pulls back, you're breathless, but not from the argument—from the way she’s made everything else disappear.

"see?" she whispers, her lips brushing your ear. "it’s just you and me, baby. nothing else matters."

you nod, your mind too hazy to argue anymore. "just us."

[hughiecampbelle]

Imagine turning to Butcher when you're trying to leave Homelander:

Without the stars and stripes blowing behind you, he didn't recognize you. In civilian clothes, you were almost human. For the first time ever he gets a good look at you. Without the lighting and cameras and makeup, without Homelander attached to your side, you seem so much smaller in person. There are dark circles around your eyes and, what little can see hidden under your hood, fresh bruises dotting your skin, your cheek and around your neck. If Homelander wanted to, he could kill you in less than a second. Hurting you like this was for fun, to pass the time. He truly believed he was untouchable. Unstoppable. He was, as far as you were concerned.

"Don't get too close, he'll-" but you can't finish. It sounds ridiculous. Silly. He'll smell Butcher on you. He'll know exactly where you were. He'll know what you were saying. Billy puts his hands up, taking a step back. The last thing he wanted to was scare you away, to cause you more harm. The Boys had been trying to get through to you for ages. It was incredibly dangerous at first, risking their cover, unsure of where you stood. For all they knew, it was too late. You'd been brainwashed. And you had protected him for some time, telling Butcher and the rest of the team that you couldn't say anything. But he was getting so much worse, so much more abusive, and you weren't sure how much longer you could take it. You weren't sure how much longer you'd survive. And then, a few days ago, you called Butcher sobbing, asking if he could meet with you.

"Why now?" It was out of the blue. Sure, he was getting violent, but he had always been violent. Stories ran for years about marks and bruises that didn't line up with your saves. People talked, but there was nothing they could do. The story you sold was that you were in love, that you were made for one another. He didn't know the truth, the full history, but he knew there was more going on behind the scenes than you let on. Between you and Homelander and Ryan, you were the perfect, most powerful, family. You were what everyone should want. You knew Butcher didn't have a lot of time left, that The Boys were doing everything they could to stop your husband. This could all be some elaborate set up. Get him caught red handed. Put an end to their desperate efforts to save everyone from dictatorship. Your voice came out quietly, your words hitting him hard, leaving his face stinging. You were desperate. You were scared.

"I don't want to die, Butcher."

[angelisgonnastartchangingurls]

roger

that fall, annie's new neighbors nick and nina moved in across the hall. "nick and nina," annie would always say when she saw them. "love saying those names together."

they were a couple just slightly older than annie -- probably 30, 31. nina worked in publishing and nick was an architect or something.

annie was a good neighbor--she was quiet--from her days living with robbie she'd adopted the habit of listening to everything from music to podcasts to TV in headphones. her apartment was clean because despite her overall efforts to clean up her drug use, she was not ready to let go of her adderall-fueled weekend cleanup sessions.

because their apartments were the only two on the floor and were shaped as mirror images of each other, their bedrooms shared a wall. this of course meant that annie could hear nick and nina fuck, which was pretty much an every-evening thing. sometimes it was very short--15 minutes or so with very clear climaxes. annie thought of mark and his wife and their focus on making each other cum and getting it over with. but other nights it was long and giggly and rough. one evening, after hearing them clearly wrap up, annie turned on her vibrator.

annie rarely used sex toys--she was truthfully, much better at getting off with her hands. her clit could be so sensitive that she often needed to wear panties to cum with a vibrator. today she put her bedsheet between her wand and her cunt. she sensed a quietness in nick and nina's bedroom. they were listening to her. she had a vocal orgasm - nothing too excessive, but audible. and then she kept going. she heard nina make an impressed noise.

leaving for work the next morning, annie ran into nina in the hallway. nina immediately blushed. annie hovered around deciding between playing dumb and being all-knowing and decided on the latter. "was i too loud last night?" annie asked. "i realized after that you could probably hear me since i can always hear you."

"oh god," nina said, turning a brighter shade of red.

"don't be shy," annie said, putting a hand on nina's shoulder. she felt nina relax into her touch. "that's being neighbors, right?"

"i can tell you're a therapist," nina said. "most people don't say this stuff out loud."

"maybe so," annie said. "well i think it is great that you two have such an active sex life."

nina whispered a shy "thank you" and practically ran from annie down the street.

on the way home, annie ran into nick, who had clearly talked to nina during the day. "hear anything good lately?" he asked her. he gestured at the headphones around her neck, and then grinned.

"sorry if i freaked out your wife," annie said. "but i do really enjoy knowing you two get after it so often."

"every night," he said. "my other friends don't believe me."

"well, i can testify," annie said.

"they've known nina since we were in high school and i think they can't really picture her as sexual."

"do you want them to picture your wife as sexual?" annie said wryly. "is that fun for you?"

he laughed. "kinda, yeah. i mean, everybody likes to brag about their hot partner."

"women like being bragged about," annie said. "even when they protest."

that evening, annie went on a second, long-delayed date with roger. they had drinks, then dinner, and then annie invited roger back to her apartment. she liked watching him reconcile in real time that he was going to fuck his therapist. it put a real pep in his step.

as roger railed annie from behind on her bed, she wondered how hard her headboard was rattling nick and nina's bedroom. the truth was, roger had a modestly-sized cock that he wasn't all that familiar with. the sex was rough and quick, and annie did not have an orgasm, and roger did not offer to get her off after cumming on her back. she politely got him out of her apartment, took a shower, masturbated, and fell asleep naked.

this time, she saw nick in the hallway in the morning. "high five," he said. "we both got laid last night."

"mine was very disappointing," annie said. "small dick, no skill, didn't get me off. you?"

"my wife rode my cock with her tight little shaved pussy while i put my fingers up her ass," he said. "i can't complain."

"nina is shaved, huh?" annie said. "i wouldn't have guessed that."

"she is sometimes," he said. "i like the variety."

"me too," annie said. "i mean, i like variety. and i am also sometimes shaved."

"you have really big tits so guys probably don't even notice your pubes, right?" he said.

"yeah that is not inaccurate," she said.

on the way home, it was nina in the elevator this time. surprisingly, she initiated the conversation.

"older man," she said, looking away. "is that a thing for you?"

"definitely," annie said. "daddy's girl."

nina laughed. "i had a...phase."

"an older man phase?"

"yeah. when i was 16."

"hot," annie said. "how old was he?"

"52," nina said. "my parents were so mad."

"i bet," annie laughed. "was he your first?"

"no," nina said. "i screwed a couple of boys my age first. just to make sure i wasn't missing anything."

"and your older man won out?"

"he had the biggest cock i have ever seen. still. i mean, nick has a very nice one. but this guy was gigantic. i don't think i could have taken him without an elastic teenage pussy."

they were in annie's apartment now. without even communicating it, annie had led her in and poured her a glass of wine.

"tell me more."

"i used to call it climbing mount rushmore, because you know, he was very gray, and it would take like a half hour to get him hard and then like 90 minutes to get him off.

"90 minutes? straight?"

"90 minutes of sucking and fucking. we dated for like five months and by the end of it i was in such good shape. i had amazing abs. he was so perfectly shaped to nail my g spot that i would cum, vaginally, like 6 or 7 times."

"amazing."

"i haven't been able to cum more than twice in a row ever since."

"so why did you break up?"

"his kids came to visit and his daughter found my panties in his bathroom," she said. "and you know, they were like, whatever, something very slutty from victoria's secret at the mall that only a teenager would buy. and his daughter forbid me from seeing him again."

"i hope she was willing to suck his dick for 90 minutes then," annie said.

nina laughed so suddenly she sprayed wine out of her nose. they both laughed. "no joke," nina said. "i called her and said something like that. she was like 22, which is so funny because at the time she seemed like an adult. but i was like, 'well who is gonna fuck your dad now, you?' and she said, 'maybe.' which made me feel like I lost the argument."

"kinda hot," annie said.

nina looked warily at her. "yeah i know," she said. "but that's a very therapist thing to think about. how all women want to kill their moms and take their place?"

"yeah i think that's universal," annie said. "although i do finally get along with my mom now."

"maybe there's hope for me," nina said. "i fucking hate my mother."

[dreamingcloudie]

im sorry for immediately jumping into requests but i see dottore content and i immediately go gdusabjnkdsa

HI HOPE YOU HAVE A NICE DAY <33 IMMA BINGE READ THROUGH YOUR STUFF BUT LEMME JUST DROP THIS RQ

reader, feeling a bit bored and lonely, gathered a bunch of segments and asked if they could just cuddle with them OF COURSE they'd agree... prime comes back from a mission to see the tasks he'd assign them half done but before he could get too angry, sees you all snuggled up in a pile with the most relaxed expression on your face he'd seen in a while.......... he tells the segments to leave and hugs you himself instead (jealous perhaps? HHEHEHE)

HAVE A GREAT DAY, FEEL FREE TO IGNORE THIS NO PRESSUVE <3 !!

❛❛ In My (Our) Arms You Go ❜❜

✎ ❛❛ Dog pile!— Oof! ❜❜

Pairing(s): Dottore (& segments) x GN!Reader

Genre/Format: Fluff (oneshot)

wc: ~1.1k

Notes: Back to our regularly scheduled fluff :D This is so cute istg 😫✋️✋️Dottore and his skrunkly segments are just ANAKSHDIEJEFIS 💕💕💕 I'm sorry this is short! ^^;

You sighed as you threw your head backwards and stared at the ceiling, the pencil that you were holding dropped onto the desk.

"I give up." You groaned into your hands.

It has only been fifteen minutes since you started to sketch random objects in the room. You thought having your mind run wild with imaginations by adding some twists to them would be the cure to your boredom. 

But it clearly backfired, it required too much thinking.

If anything, it made you feel even more bored than before, if that was even possible.

Heck, you even tried to watch the raindrops sliding down the window pane, pretending that they were racing against each other! 

No matter how much effort you put into distracting your bored out mind, you were too occupied with thoughts of your lover. 

A week ago, the Tsrista had sent out an order to Dottore, there was a mission that required his assistance in the far lands of Sumeru. And since this was an order from the Cryo Archon herself, there was no way he could decline even if he wanted to. 

So reluctantly, you had to let him go for you didn't even know how long. 

Without his goofy laughs and your daily dose of kisses, you felt lonely…

Especially with how your work schedule has been pretty hectic lately. Just as you thought you could have some peaceful moments with Dottore, he had to leave.

What kind of cruel joke was this?

What to do now… You thought as you closed your eyes.

Reading… Cooking... Beating Delta's ass up—

Wait, what?

Where did that come from? 

Reopening your eyes again, you focused on your hearing and could make out faint footsteps walking past your room along with a grumpy voice.

"I can't believe Delta messed all of this up! More work for me, ugh."

So it was a segment.

The segments…

You gasped a bit when a sudden idea came to mind. 

How fun would it be if you cuddled all of them at once?

You were getting a little giddy about your genius idea but then a realization made you doubt your plan.

They are probably busy though… You let out a huff.

Before Dottore left, he had given out a task for each of them to complete. He expected them to finish everything he asked of them by the time he returned.

But a fifteen minute break for them wouldn't hurt, right? You reasoned.

---

As you slammed the laboratory doors open, you slightly cringed at the loud noise it made when it hit the wall, startling some of the segments.

"(Y/n), my dear. You could've just knocked next time," Omega lightly scolded you.

Smiling at him sheepishly, you lightly scratched your neck.

"Haha, sorry."

He shook his head, chuckling at how adorable you were.

"Well, what brings you here?"

Right. 

"So I was thinking… if we could all cuddle together?" You asked. 

Your voice wasn't loud enough to reach the other segments, but they could still make out the words "we" and "cuddle". All of them instantly dropped what they were doing and surrounded you.

Getting affection from their darling? And with no Prime around? Who would pass up such a great offer?

"Are we gonna cuddle?!"

"Can we really?"

"Cuddling? I wanna join!"

Well, that was a lot easier than you thought it'd be. 

---

Oh, how you loved their happy little faces as they trailed behind you, with you leading them to your room.

The moment you got into your room, you laid down onto your bed and sprawled your limbs out, inviting them to come join you.

One by one, each of them plopped themselves down onto the bed with you. 

Some of them held onto your arms while some intertwined their legs with yours, and a head was laid against your torso.

Though, even with this king-sized bed, it could barely fit all of them. 

Theta moved around a little to find a comfortable position when he accidentally kicked someone.

"Ow! Who kicked me?!" Delta yelped.

"Deserved, you gave me more work to do by spilling the serum everywhere!"

"Oh my— Whoever has their feet near my face, please move. It smells of rotten flesh." Omega covered his nose from… whoever feet that was.

Well, this was definitely a bit hard to get used to with how much weight was laying on top of you. 

You weren't complaining though, the weather was a bit colder than usual and they made such a great heat source.

Their bickerings died down and silence soon took over the room, only to be occasionally broken with some light snores and the soft sounds of rain hitting the window.

Ah, life was good.

---

After a week of being away from the comfort of the palace, he was finally back from the mission and he felt like he would pass out any moment.

The mission he came back from was hell even though it was a success in the end. Nonetheless, he was now back and he had missed you dearly.

Though before going to your room, he was looking forward to seeing how his personal project was coming along. He had calculated that by the time he came back, it would've been completed by his segments.

However, all he saw was an empty lab. What's even stranger was that the work was half-done.

Where did they go? They wouldn't abandon their work like this unless it was an emergency…

Dottore turned back and walked to your room, afraid that something might have happened.

The sight he was greeted with made his blood boil. His segments were slacking off, hugging you as they slept. But when he got closer and took a glance at you, he noticed how peaceful you looked, and it's been a long time since he had seen you this relaxed.

You were complaining about how your work was stressing you out and you weren't able to get some proper rest.

Well, he supposed he'd let his segments off the hook this time for helping you to relax.

Though, his chest tightened at the realization that he wasn't the one who was holding you.

It was his turn now.

He nudged one of the segments awake, and soon the others began to wake up as well at the movement. Miraculously, you were still sound asleep.

All of them stiffened at the sight of Prime glaring at them, oh boy, they could already hear the mouthful lecture they'd get later.

"All of you get back to work, now."

The segments scurried to get out of the room, a little down that they had to leave you so soon.

Changing out of his work clothes and taking off his mask, he slowly got into the spot beside you. Chuckling lightly when his thumb cleaned the drool that left your mouth.

His arm wrapped around you, sighing in content that he finally got to hold you again.

All to himself.

[elderwisp]

◁ || ▷ now playing

?: Go with the whiskey, it’s your favorite.

Atlas: I see your memory is still sharp as ever.

?: Always.

Atlas: What are you doing here, Rowan?

?: That’s no way to greet an old friend. 

Atlas: I’d prefer it if you stayed away.

Rowan: What’s the fun in that?

Atlas: I’d be happier. I dunno, some kind of repose for my soul.

Rowan: Ah, see, you must be mistaken if you think I’m what’s holding you back. People like us, well, we run towards trouble if given the opportunity.

Atlas: You’re a dirty liar.

Rowan: It’s the truth. You can pretend all you want in that pretty little head of yours but eventually it’ll all come out.

Atlas: Shut up. Shut. Up. As a matter of fact, get out. Go.

Rowan: Whatever you say, bunny. Looks like you’re about to have your hands full anyway. When you’re ready to stop pretending, you know where to find me.

Atlas: [ huffs ] 

Kai: Aren’t you mature? 

Atlas: Kai, we’re not doing this here.

Kai: Honestly, the nerve you have to show your face around here is appalling. 

Atlas: I’m only here for Dan.

Kai: Really now? Does she know that?

Atlas: What are you hoping to gain from this conversation? The passive aggression is getting old. 

Kai: Oh that’s rich! Maybe I shouldn’t have to throw hints at you to be a better friend!

Atlas: Christ, it’s not like I expected you to do that! Besides, I tried to make things right.

Kai: No you didn’t. I wanted you to be there, Atlas. I wanted you to actually put in some effort for once. 

Atlas: Really? Because you made it seem like it was a lot more than that the other day. 

Kai: You’re wrong-

Atlas: [ interjects ] Actually, I’m not done. You wanna know what your problem is? You expect every single person to figure out your petty feelings. Some advice? Be honest.

Kai: About what?! God you’re such an asshole I don’t understand how I liked you for that long!

Atlas: Huh. 

Kai: I, uhm.

Atlas: Is that why you treated Taryn like that?

Kai: What? No, I wouldn’t. 

Atlas: But you did. Wow. I can't believe you.

Kai: Wait. 

Atlas: So much for your concern over her, as if you actually cared or was that all a front too?

Kai: It wasn’t! I do care!

Atlas: You don’t know the first thing about sympathy!

Kai: I-I’m sorry.

Atlas: It’s too late for that now. Tell Dan I said bye, I can’t stand being here knowing you’re around.

[gojoswhitebabydolllashes]

everyone wanted part two. So here we go😭😭

---

That night, you slept at the X mansion. Away from yours and logans home, if you could call it that anymore. You still couldn't believe what had happened, and it wasn't a cruel dream or some kind of illusion.

You were sure you'd have preferred to be hallucinating massive demons with guns over whatever nightmare was playing out. But to you, demons were everywhere, because what kind of hell is this where you are lying in bed without your lover?

Without your lover. Lover?

As you lay in bed with tear stained cheeks, you determined three things.

One: You needed to stop crying.

Two: You wish you weren't crying.

And three: you wish you didn't have to cry alone.

Since the start of your relationship, you'd never cried alone. Late nights when you sobbed on the porch, he was always there. And when you wanted milk from the fridge early in the morning, he was there. But this didn't excuse his behaviour or his attitude, or the way he'd defiled your honesty and kindness, and taken advantage of your loyalties.

Logan once asked you, "Do you think we're soulmates in every universe?" And at first I couldn't answer him honestly.

I wanted to answer, kicking and screaming, I wanted to rattle the stars with a scream. It made me think of midnight walks. It made me think of green silk and the flannel he wore. It made me think of bonfires and wood chips and the roast meat he slaved away at the night before we had the fight. It made me remember the farm and the chickens and the cows, it made me think of children and the ones we could have-should have- had.

So to which I answered his question. "Are we even in this one?"

And every night after that, he slept with an open mind.

With Logan, you used to feel loved and comfortable, but now you feel pathetic for trying. Now you feel pathetic for putting in effort when all you were getting was a brick wall.

Pathetic pathetic pathetic

It's all just a bit, isn't it? All of this world? All of the lives we end up living. Whether you're living without someone or crying or trying to find a job. At any point in your life, you become pathetic, not to yourself but to everyone who has never been in your position, you look pathetic. Like a puppet for them to string along.

"You miss him, don't you?" Storm appeared suddenly at your door, making you jump out of your skin.

You frowned and sat up. "I do. But I don't know how to stop it. It's like pain is tearing through me and I can't find where it started"

You held your face in frustration. Storm sat by you on your bed.

"Why do you miss him so much? Typically after being hurt by someone your supposed to hate them" she strifled a laugh.

Hate them? Hate. Hate Hate Hate ha-

You couldn't hate Logan.

You could kick him, and scream at him and forget about him and tell him he was worthless and tell him he was a horrible person and stab him and punch him and strangle him.

But you could never hate him.

"I don't know how to hate him, roro, he means so much to me and that's why this is so painful" tears flooded your eyes again.

"Pain will pass over time. Unfortunately, some of us get the slow side of it, but it's not if you get through it, it's how you get through it"

How were you gonna get through this? That's what you asked yourself. What were you going to do now that you were alone? Is this what you want? Or what you have worked so desperately to not have?

Your whole life, you have worked to get anywhere but here. And now you're exactly where you didnt want to be.

"What do i do without him?"

Cry

Scream

Yell

Fall

Fail

Agony

Pain

Fear

Failure failure failure

"Well..." she trailed off. "I can't answer that for you. Unfortunately, no one really can. It's up to you from this point forward"

The person who would understand you. Is the person who just stormed away from. Why do you do this to yourself?

You let out a loud groan and fell back onto your pillows with a dulled thud.

"There are people here you can talk to, of course, for support. But no one can tell you what to do, and I hate to say it, but for a while, you're a bit on your own. But you know what there's comfort in that too"

Is there? Is this what you were going to be comforted by? Being alone. The tranquil, painful, serene, agonising, loneliness that you distanced yourself from?

"When will I know it's time?" You asked

Ororo stood up from your bed and walked to the door. "When your heart tells you to get up", she smiled softly and left the room.

When my heart tells me to get up?

[riality-check]

part 3 of... whatever this au is. here's part 1 and part 2 if you missed them. tw substance abuse. part 4 here. part 5 here. part 6 here. part 7 here.

ao3

"You ever taken a hit?"

"Excuse me?"

First, Harrington calls his songs "boring" and "repetitive." "Talking about all the same thing." And, yeah, maybe he does have a point. Maybe Eddie can't write about much else, but that's a casualty of not being able to think about much else.

Everyone says addiction is selfish, and they're right. No one talks about how recovery is, too.

So, sorry that he's consumed by notoriously all-consuming things.

But then, Harrington shows up late to the studio. Granted, Eddie was, too, but Harrington stumbled into the little room fifteen minutes after the time Chrissy set up for them, ever-present coffee in hand.

And now he asks that.

"Like a punch," he explains. "Have you ever been hit?"

Eddie lets out a breath. "Yeah, I've been hit."

He thinks back to being a freshman in high school, what feels like forever ago, and getting shoved and tripped and swirlied by senior jock assholes.

There were never any closed-fist punches, but Eddie thinks he gets the idea.

"So you know that it feels good."

Eddie stares at him. "Good is not the word-"

"There's a moment," Harrington interrupts, and Eddie wants to kill him, "between the impact and the pain. You feel everything: how their hand feels, whether they're wearing rings, if they're holding something. And that might not feel good, but right after they hit you, everything is warm. And it feels really good, right until the pain sets in."

Eddie doesn't know what to say, not really, so he mouths off. "Got a lot of experience?"

"Four diagnosed concussions," Harrington replies.

Well. Eddie wasn't expecting that.

Just like he wasn't expecting Harrington's music to actually be good. He stayed up with the band last night, listening. And, yeah, he didn't like the goddamn synth chords, but reading along with the lyrics...

It was impressive. Eddie was impressed, okay?

Harrington's lyrics are far-ranging and emotionally impactful. He writes about family and love and survival in these really compelling, sometimes upbeat, sometimes not, ways. He writes about getting better and getting back up and fighting and Eddie gets it. He gets why Chrissy got his help.

Because not only is Harrington a rising star with a voice that Eddie thinks could be a little grittier if he put in the effort, but he also knows how to write about a lot of stuff.

And Eddie, since - since all of it, has clearly forgotten how to do so.

So, maybe, just maybe, he should start throwing his expectations about Harrington out the window.

"You know what it feels like," Harrington says. "So write about it."

Eddie sighs and lets his head flop onto the back of the couch. He hears Steve shift in his chair, hears him yawn.

In the silence, he wonders if he's sipping his coffee or covering his mouth like he did last week.

Eddie thinks that if he finds out the answer, he'll need a cigarette to kill the itch that'll inevitably spring up.

"Or not," Harrington mumbles.

Eddie drops his head forward. "Give a guy a second, will you? I don't know how-"

"Well, I'm here to help, not spoon-feed you lyrics."

"I didn't ask-"

"Oh, believe me, I know."

"Then why the hell-"

"Write about losing," Harrington snaps.

Eddie tilts his head to the side. "What?"

"You write about-"

"I know what I write about."

"Then you should know," Harrington says, raising his voice, "that there was a point where you wanted to give in."

Eddie shuts his mouth, and, despite his better instincts, leans forward, toward Harrington, far enough that his knees hit the coffee table between the couch and the chair.

"Because when you're fighting monsters, a little part of you thinks, it would be so much easier if I just lost. If I threw up my hands and let them get me."

Eddie thinks back to waking up after blackouts. To being carried places and dunked under cold water to sober the fuck up before we go out there. To figuring out ways to stay higher longer, refusing to be beholden to the inevitable crash.

And he hates that Steve Harrington has somehow found that out about him, however vaguely.

"Lot of experience with monsters?" Eddie says because damn if Harrington gets to cut him without getting cut back.

Harrington leans forward in turn. "You have no idea."

He picks up the black ballpoint pen on the coffee table and shoves it toward Eddie, toward his blank notepad.

Eddie bites his tongue, takes it, and writes lyrics and a lead guitar part in the fastest time he's ever managed, with Harrington as a sounding board, offering his suggestions.

They're good suggestions.

It's going to be a good song.

It's too bad that Eddie can't stand Harrington's smug smirks and his terrifying assumptions and his little bit of spaciness. It's too bad that after he sees Harrington swipe at his nose - even though it's probably not like that - when they're done that Eddie has to go outside and smoke two cigarettes to stop thinking about it.

Otherwise, they might actually make a good team.