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uomo-accattivante · 4 years ago

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Great comprehensive interview with Elvira on the making of The Letter Room and filmmaking, in general. One interesting tidbit mentioned: she is currently developing a podcast about sex. 👀🤔

For most of her creative life, Elvira Lind has been behind the the lens compassionately capturing true stories as a documentary filmmaker. Her debut feature, Songs for Alexis, observes two young lovebirds navigating a long distance relationship and challenging views on gender identity in the modern age. While her sophomore feature, Bobbi Jenne, explores the life of a famous dancer fighting for her own creative and personal independence.

Despite her prolific doc work, a story that couldn't simply be told in its raw form kept circulating in her head: a dark prison comedy about the secret life of a correctional officer trying to bring humanity to the prison system. When he gets transferred to a job in the letter room, he finds himself a little too involved in the private lives of the inmates.

Far along in her second pregnancy, and with the support of an incredible team of collaborators, Elvira took on the challenge of writing and directing her first narrative short, "The Letter Room." The film stars Oscar Isaac and Alia Shawkat, and has had an all-star festival run, screening at Telluride, Tribeca, and the Palm Springs International Film Festival. Here, Elvira reflects on the joys and challenges of creating your first short film—putting empathy first, reshaping the tropes around pregnancy, and screening in the COVID era.

vimeo

FTW: How did you become a filmmaker?

Elvira Lind: I’ve always loved film. I was very drawn to documentaries because it felt like you were entering something that was really happening. You opened a door and were already inside the film. You’re just trying to keep up with what’s being thrown at you. As opposed to fiction where you have to conjure it up from nowhere. I loved imagining and writing stories when I was little, but I didn’t have the confidence to pursue it.

I didn’t come from a family of filmmakers. And I came from a time when people had a little shitty camcorder that you borrowed from someone’s uncle, and buying film was expensive. Things opened up and changed a lot when cameras became more accessible.

I could only afford one year of film school in Cape Town, where I met some amazing people and learned about so many different ways of storytelling. I came back to Denmark and found myself working for free a lot for other filmmakers while doing a side job. The paid work was very hard to get, but I’d rather work for free with filmmakers that I loved and have more responsibilities than have access to nothing. It wasn’t easy to find my way in, but it’s so worth it.

And now you live in New York. How does this global background affect your general filmmaking style and approach?

I definitely bring a lot of Danish documentary traditions with me and hold it very dear. There are a lot of kick ass female documentary filmmakers in Denmark that have taught me a lot. There’s a good support system for women there. It’s an incredibly privileged place in that there’s funding from the government to make films. You can make things that, in my opinion, are often far more interesting because it’s not reliant on how it’s going to make money in the box office.

You’ve shot many of your documentaries in the past. So what was it like this time to be working with a cinematographer?

I always wanted to work with a cinematographer on my documentaries; we just couldn’t afford it. Now for “The Letter Room”, I worked with Sam Chase, who has got such a brilliant eye and it was wonderful to have someone to work with on composing the look of the film because I’m usually doing it by myself. It is kind of like a marriage. I work with the same editor on all my projects as well. You enter this symbiotic sort of dance together. For me, it also means you have to fight about things and disagree and then make up and hear each other out. My editor, Adam Nielsen, is the kind of guy who just comes up with genius ideas while in the shower or on the way home from work on his bicycle. You have to find these key people in your life where you can bounce ideas back and forth with.

Where did the idea for “The Letter Room” come from?

It was a story that was brewing in my head for a long time, but I wasn’t sure how to put a narrative film together. I just started to write it down and then it kept developing.

There was a podcast that I listened to that really inspired me. It told the story of different men who were all unknowingly writing love letters to the same woman. She started to ask for money and help with rent, but the letters she wrote were so wonderful and all these men were very in love with her. These very lonely men felt like magic had entered their lives. They all eventually found out that the woman was actually a man writing to different people trying to get their money. They were all heartbroken, but one of the men said that the worst part was losing these letters and that the fantasy was gone. He wished they could just keep writing to each other. So much of life is fantasy and trying to live through other people’s lives. I’m very drawn to stories of loneliness and bottled up feelings.

And then I am firmly against the American prison system. It’s heartbreaking, frustrating, and I can’t make sense of it. How do you even begin to explain this system to a child?

It’s a society that doesn’t care about humanity. I wanted to show the monotony, the repetition, the sadness. I don’t see the bigger goal or purpose of locking people away for countless years and taking away all the things that makes you feel human, that makes life joyous. I really believe that we can all change and this system teaches people nothing. “The Letter Room'' is the combination of these two concepts that I’m very passionate about.

And then I got pregnant for the second time and I hadn’t made a film between the two. It was a crazy feeling to be taken over again by pregnancy. A wonderful friend of mine, Sofia Sondervan-Bild, came to me and said, “I think you should make this film and I’ll make it with you.” Initially, I freaked out and thought I didn’t know how to do fiction and doubted how I could make a film in a prison, but she inspired me and told me to do it. She’s just one of these incredibly powerful people that you want to go on an adventure with. She made me feel like my pregnancy wasn’t going to stand in the way of me making this film. We ended up shooting while I was far along in my pregnancy in a prison in the middle of a summer heat wave. It was crazy, but it was the best thing that I could’ve done at the time.

When you were directing on set at that stage of pregnancy, did you feel like you were reshaping tropes of what women are capable of?

It was insane. The funny thing was that the crew was like, “we can’t complain that we are tired because she is extremely pregnant and still running around.” I was so high off of that experience. When we finished, I collapsed. I fell straight onto the couch and then I have a two and a half year old screaming my name. That was more work for me than directing the short. I edited the film right before I gave birth actually, and then I gave birth and did sound right after. I was pumping breast milk in the corner in the darkness during the sound edit.

I’ve learned a lot from surpassing whatever I thought was physically possible with being pregnant. I learned that being in a creative process gives you so much energy that it allows you to be in whatever shape, size, form, mental space you can. People are ready to give you their support, if you choose the right people. I’m really grateful that I chose such wonderful collaborators who supported me through it all. Even when people were questioning my choice to direct a film while being pregnant in a prison. Why not? Women get pregnant and then we still need to be supported so that we can continue to make the things we want to do.

What was your experience with getting “The Letter Room” funded?

It’s really hard, let’s be honest. There aren’t a lot of people sitting around waiting to fund a short film. We ended up working with Topic, which is a part of First Look Media. They are just incredible and really support filmmakers with whatever their vision is. I’ve had great experiences and some really bad experiences with funding, so I know this was an ideal scenario.

Having a short that is over 30 minutes long seems like a feat. At what stage in the process did you know this was going to be a longer piece? And how did that decision affect the shoot in both positive and difficult ways?

It was way too long at first, and when I shortened it, it was still 32 minutes. We could only afford five days of shooting, and a lot of it is shot on active prison grounds, which have an insane amount of protocol. We almost used everything we shot.

I’m not used to being able to have different angles to choose from in my doc work, so I think I just knew exactly what I wanted. I know that my producers were worried that I wasn’t getting enough, but to me, I was like, I’m getting double of what I usually get on a documentary! Everyone was quietly concerned, but everything worked out when we got to the edit.

The short’s length hasn’t done any favors for me so far, but you need to breathe as an audience, you need to pace it out. If I cut out certain minutes, it would’ve felt rushed and you wouldn’t have believed the arcs that the characters had.

I loved the concept of placing a very empathetic character in a setting that is contrary to that personality type. You included so many details that made the world feel so three dimensional and cared for. Can you talk about those decisions to create that feeling?

It means so much to me that it made you feel that way. What frustrates me about the prison system is that it lacks any empathy or understanding of human nature and nurture and who we are. What we need to become better people. It takes all of that away.

I spoke to people who have spent a lot of time in prison and they told me that you have to hide your feelings and that showing any signs of weakness will be a disaster. It’s the worst possible scenario you can imagine yourself in. Being robbed of every privacy, anything that makes you happy, anything that makes you feel like yourself. I imagined the character of a caregiver in this setting who wants to help and finds a silly way to do so. I was very inspired by that story of the love letters that I talked about earlier. What does it mean to lie if you’re making someone else happy?

It’s the morning of your first day of the shoot — how do you feel?

I was very nervous. I had never said ‘action’ before. I’ve been on a lot of sets, but I didn’t want to seem like I didn’t know what I was doing, but it’s also okay not to know. Mistakes are going to happen, and sometimes they become gifts. At the same time, I was very excited. You come in and there are all these people there with you who are there to make this thing you’ve written come to life.

What are some things you would do on set to create a safe space and vulnerable environment?

We did everything we could to make the set a safe space. It was very difficult and stressful to shoot in an active prison, but we made sure to actively ask our crew if everyone’s feeling okay and if we can do anything to make the situation better. I’m very vulnerable and encourage all of my crew to be vulnerable with me. Mistakes are welcome.

It's a short film, people come and work on this not because they’re making a million dollars, but because they want to be there and are being incredibly generous with their time and energy. It was such a good environment that even when challenging things came up, it was still a lot of fun.

What was it like working with actors for the first time?

That was one of the biggest challenges for me. I’ve heard so many different stories in passing of the least helpful note or worst thing to say to an actor. You want to be respectful and actors have their way of working. Ultimately, they are all really talented actors and all of them came with so much energy and a lot of ideas.

I spent time with each of them talking about their character. Those 1 on 1 conversations helped me a lot in the writing process as well because you’re bouncing ideas off of each other and they’re asking you questions about how they would respond to a certain situation.

I had always imagined Alia Shawkat as Rosita and she ended up wanting to do it and came from LA to film it. I had tears in my eyes when we were filming the scene of her and Oscar. They were excited to do the scene together. It was all a dream.

What was the experience of working creatively alongside your partner like?

We were joking a lot about it before because there was already the stress of being so pregnant and we have a 2 year old at home, and now I was putting us in another highly intense and demanding situation. Either it was going to be great OR we would drive each other nuts. But we had so much fun. It was wonderful to work together. I was so happy to be on set and make my film and he’s just so talented and fun to be around. Those little moments where you know each other so well—I’d give him notes and he just kept surprising me and was so respectful of my directions.

He found this photo for him to connect to the character and it became very fundamental to me. It was this incredible black and white photo from the 70s of a prison guard. I had always imagined that he would have this inner salsa soundtrack playing in his soul and we would play Rubén Blades and 70s salsa music and Oscar just morphed that into music into everything and created this unique character.

And he was wearing a fat suit the entire shoot and I was pregnant and Alia Shawkat had her pregnant belly on. The three of us—it was so funny.

It seems like the perfect first experience of going into narrative with people that you really trust and support you.

Definitely! Find the people that you can team up with that really believe in your vision and who will push you to do exactly what you had in mind. People who never try to push you into these conventional routes. Our creative voices are so fragile. You want to be on the same page so that they see what you’re trying to do and want to bring that out of you. Where they’re treating your film as a sacred thing that you’re creating together.

How do you know when a film is done?

Fiction is very different from documentaries. With documentaries, it never feels like it’s done because there are so many options. That’s also why I love fiction so much; It’s so much faster. It’s a whole different beast to tame a documentary with hundreds of hours of footage where you’re reinventing the wheel every day.

How have you built up your own confidence as a director and your unique voice?

Stubbornness. I’ve had many experiences working with people who didn’t believe in my project. You have to stick to your guns and trust your instincts. Once you find your voice, you find people that want to go on that ride with you and find your vision interesting. It’s a miracle when any of us gets a project made, so your confidence can’t come from how much money your movie made. It has to come from somewhere else. Did you do justice to the people you portrayed in your story? Did anyone walk away feeling like something had changed within them?

What is a good director to you?

Someone who is driven with passion without letting that passion take over and become any source of frustration that’s taken out on other people. It should feel like a collaborative effort. And having gratitude every day that you’re making something with other people who are donating their time. You’d be nowhere without them. One of the most important things is making sure that your crew is treating everyone equally. It depends on the size of the production, but having someone who can sense what’s happening in all different departments and having department heads that are there to protect everyone. Listen to each other, and make sure everyone feels safe and is in the best place to be creative.

With COVID, what has the adjustment been like to being in an online space for this festival run?

I’m really deeply saddened by not having the human interaction aspect of it. It feels so crucial to be in the room together, to meet and see each other's projects and share the experience, to cry and laugh next to people you don’t know. I’m grieving to be honest. We just gotta get through this time. It reminds us of how sacred it is for us to gather and how that feels, and I hope that all of that will come back after this and that cinemas will survive. We really need them.

What’s next for you?

Right now I’m writing more fiction and working on a new documentary feature that I am kind of researching and shooting at the same time. I am also creating a podcast about sex, called “The List” with my friend, writer and photographer Kirra Cheers, based on a book and play she wrote. My husband and I just started a production company together, Mad Gene Media, in order to develop and produce our own material. So. lots of exciting things to continue with in the new year.

Born in 1981 in Copenhagen, Elvira Lind graduated from School of Media and Creative Arts in Cape Town in 2006 majoring in documentary film where she received two awards for her final year achievements. She has worked within that field since directing and shooting documentaries of various lengths for TV, cinema and web on 4 different continents.In 2020 she premiered her first fiction project, a 32 min short film she wrote and directed. The film was sold to Topic and was invited to various festivals including Telluride and Tribeca FF. Elvira's feature doc BOBBI JENE premiered at Tribeca Film Festival in 2017 where it won all awards in its category including Best Feature documentary, best editing and best Cinematography. The film had theatrical release in US, Spain and Scandinavia.Elvira's first documentary feature Songs for Alexis premiered at Toronto HOT DOCS in 2014 and screened and competed at a long list of international festivals. Her 8 part documentary TV series "Twiz and Tuck" was bought by VICELAND and launched in 2017. Elvira now lives and works out of New York.

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#oscar isaac #elvira lind #the letter room #mad gene media #interview

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mybiasisexo · 4 years ago

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The Wedding

Genre: Angst | Exlovers!au (is that even a real au???) | Enemies to Lovers

Pairing: Chanyeol x Reader

Length: 7.8k

Warning: Unfinished | Language | Funny AF (im sorry its prob not even funny :/)

Summary: Your good friend, Kim Junmyeon, is getting married, and with that news comes a lot of old history with a certain ex that will be present at said wedding--yike

Author’s Note: Let me just tell yall I am sO EXCITED ABOUT THIS FIC!!!! its a WIP and like, in 2016 I started it for Jackson Wang lmaoo. But then I left the fandom and it sat dusty in my document file, just waiting to be continued. So I was like, ‘hey, I should turn it into a Suho fic!’ but halfway into changing the characters I realized this isn't for Suho. Then it clicked!!! Park Chanyeol!!! So, that’s what's going on there. Have no idea when I’ll post, but it’s gonna be juicy, so just enjoy this lil tidbit mmkay??? (also def not going to name the fic The Wedding cause ew? but I can’t think of a title just yet so that's what im stuck with :/ Also also, I really fucking love Park Chanyeol like its gross ://)

NOW AN ONGOING SERIES

MASTERLIST

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“You’ve been staring at that sheet of paper for days now,” Kang Seulgi, your best friend, points out. She sits beside you at your pale wooden dining table, hands curling around the warmth of a mug she presses to the pout of her mouth. If you weren’t so busy staring at the elegant announcement currently clutched in your hands, you would have caught the judging lift of her eyebrow.

That being said, you do catch the amusement in her tone.

Biting your lip, you run a finger gently over the thick white parchment. In a dazzling gold script reads, “because you have shared in our lives and supported our love, we, Im Nayeon & Kim Junmyeon, invite you to our wedding….” Above the words is a picture of the before mentioned, smiling sickeningly dotingly at one another as their noses touch, arms wound around each other like the band around her pretty left ring finger.

You feel like you are going to be sick.

“Have you RSVP’d yet?” Seulgi asks, oblivious to your inner turmoil. She swirls her spoon around her drink, the metal drags agonizingly against the bottom of her glass.

Her words finally yank you out of your haze, away from the invite that has been haunting you for days now.

“I will,” you answer simply.

She scoffs, rolling her eyes for extra measure. Leaning forward, she places her cursed cup down, focusing on you. “Honey, the wedding is in a couple weeks. You need to RSVP now before he starts harassing. I’m honestly surprised he hasn’t yet.”

You wince, knowing Junmyeon well enough to know it is only a matter of time before he does just that.

“Do you want me to do it for you?” She asks gently with a reassuring tilt of her head. She reaches for your hand, patting it comfortingly.

“Please?” You rasp, relief evident in your voice. She laughs prettily and you pout at her mocking your evident distress.

“Who knew you hated weddings.” She shakes her head before pulling out her phone, typing away.

You release a slow breath through your tense teeth and give into the temptation to peek at the invite laying on the table haphazardly. Drawn as though it was the moon gravitationally pulling your waves to Nayeon and Junmyeon’s obvious love for one another.

No. You don’t hate weddings.

You just hate that yours wasn’t first.

You wouldn’t label yourself a bitter person.

But ever since you received the rather abrupt news of the wedding, you have been fully consumed with bitterness.

Three years ago, you were planning your wedding.

You had a wonderful man in your life who you were mere months away from calling your husband. All of your friends were envious of the relationship you had and were all undeniably sure that the two of you were, not only meant to be, but would spend the rest of your lives together.

But, unfortunately, life doesn’t work out that way.

Three years later, and you now watch as one of your friends takes that dream and makes it their own.

You’re happy for Junmyeon, really truly are, but his wedding is a grim reminder of your failure, only leaving you with this unanswered question:

Where did you go wrong?

~*~

“All packed?” Seulgi asks.

You nod, dragging your unreasonably overpacked suitcase into the living room of your shared Seoul apartment.

“Thank god we’re not that close to Nayeon,” Seulgi muses. “We get to wear our own dresses.”

“And get to spend more time on the beach.” The both of you cackle. Neither one of you dislike the girl, although in the five years you have known her due to Junmyeon, you haven’t really formed a bond any stronger than being acquainted. You always assumed she was probably intimidated by the fact you both were female and close to her boyfriend, bringing out that strange sense of competition, or boundaries, keeping you all from growing closer despite efforts made. She has a particular distaste for Seulgi, what with her being Junmyeon’s ex and all.

The term “ex” didn’t really fit what she is to him. More like a routine fling throughout college that fizzled out the moment he met Nayeon. The two were never official—although, you are sure, she wouldn’t have minded had they been.

“Speaking of people being in the wedding.” You sober. Seulgi, who is leaning against her just as overstuffed suitcase stiffens at your tone, expectantly waiting for you to reveal the one thought that has been eating you alive since you had received the invitation. “Chanyeol will probably be there, huh?”

The color instantly drains out of your best friend’s face. Speaking of exes….

“I didn’t even think of that!” She yells, covering her face with her hands before walking over to you in a hurry. She pulls your hands into her now clammy ones, holding them tightly. “It won’t be a big deal, right? It’s been three years! Plus, I heard he gained a lot of weight since his time abroad—you know how they like their greasy food there. Nothing to worry about! You look fantastic.”

Tears prick at your eyes as you swallow the growing lump in your throat. Three years… and now you will have to confront the biggest regret in your life.

“You’re right,” you push through the ball of tears as positively as you could muster. “We’ve had time to move on. We can be adults about this. I’m fine!”

Your voice cracks at the end and you clear your throat to make room past the burning sensation.

“You’re more than fine,” Seulgi reassures, swaying your connected hands. “You’re successful and sexy and rich! He’s not worthy of the bottom of your heels.”

You hug her tightly, laughing at her attempt to cheer you up.

Once separated, you take a calming breath and attempt to smile. “Let’s get this show on the road.”

Your taxi arrives and you both wobble your luggage into the vehicle. Seulgi gives the driver the address to the ferry and you give her a quizzical look.

“Isn’t Yerim coming?” You ask, voice quiet to keep your conversation private.

“Not anymore. The little sis apparently has a date.” She throws you a conspiringly smile.

“Oh, so she ditched us for a man?” You falsely pout. You didn’t mind what Yerim was doing, as long as she was going to be there.

You aren’t going to lie to yourself, the closer you both get to the destination, the more your apprehension dims as excitement takes it place.

The wedding is going to be held at one of Junmyeon’s father’s swanky hotels on a beach at Jeju Island. You all had spent a spring break there your junior year and it was magical—for many reasons.

Despite the bittersweet memories, you are looking forward to being around beautiful scenery and old friends. Life, as always, gets in the way, and it has been a while since the whole gang has been able to spend some quality time together.

You all missed each other so much, you turned the event into an excuse to have a vacation, just the old gang, well, minus Junmyeon since he’ll be on his honeymoon, although he was able to pull some strings to cheapen your rooms so that you could all stay longer.

That’s all Seulgi and you can talk about on the ferry as you enjoy the cool early autumn breeze on your face, chilly from the little sharp droplets of water. You all had a full itinerary and the week was full of expectation.

You finally arrive to the island and hail another taxi to get you to the vaguely familiar hotel.

You whistled lowly as you craned your neck, blocking the sun with your hand as you take in the hovering Greek inspired hotel.

“It’s bigger than I remember.”

“That’s what she said,” Seulgi replies instantly, almost robotically as she squints up at your current home.

Her words make you shake your head. “We’re not even with the guys yet and they’re already rubbing off on you.”

She winces, catching what she just said. “Old habits?”

You both laugh and head inside, checking in easily. You can’t help but glance around every few minutes. One, because, holy shit this place is beautiful, all whites and golds and pillars and painted sceneries on the ceilings, it’s something straight from a fairytale. Two, because, you’re keeping an eye out for familiar faces.

Your room is on the sixth floor and your jaw drops at the luxuriousness that is your shared room.

“This is bigger than our apartment,” Seulgi states in awe. You agree with a nod, taking in the gentle fabrics on your bed and the rainforest showerheads—yes, heads, plural, there’s three to be exact—and the floor-to-ceiling windows that open up the back wall of the living quarters, revealing a tranquil scene of the beach you are going to undoubtedly be spending majority of this trip at, hopefully intoxicated.

You both don’t have too much time to gander, dinner is at seven and it is past four.

The wedding, being from a more high-class family, will be running a bit differently than the typical kind. Because there are so many people invited, there will be, what has been deemed, a pre-ception party. It’s a mixer of sorts, where everyone invited will be able to meet one another as well as the husband and bride to be.

It sounds a tad strange to you, but you can’t judge them too much, knowing all too well how much rich people love their professional parties.

This is just day one of the three-day event that is Kim Junmyeon’s wedding.

Tomorrow, for those involved, will be the rehearsal, as well as the bachelor and bachelorette parties, with the following day being D-day.

Your other best friend, and best man to the groom, Oh Sehun, has been texting you nonstop the past couple days, keeping you informed on all that is Junmyeon’s big day. He didn’t want to outwardly lead it on, but you gathered just how happy he was for his other best friend as well as being such an important role in such a big event.

Making this a reunion trip was also his idea.

You are nearly a hundred percent positive Chanyeol is going to be in that group, but have been trying to ignore it and remain optimistic for Sehun’s sake.

After getting ready, you head down to the ballroom where the dinner is being held. It’s just as beautiful as the rest of the hotel. The walls are painted gold and tan with arched windows that show the glow of the sunset ahead. A string quartet sit in the corner and the entire back wall across from the entrance is lined with rectangular tables covered in food. Twenty or so round tables dot the rest of the floor with one more rectangular table on the far right where the future bride and groom sat with their families.

It is preoccupied by at least thirty people, and you’re glad you decided on the olive-green floor-length silk dress that fell off your shoulders elegantly. Everyone in the room is of higher class and you know ‘cheap’ is a word none of them have heard in decades, if ever.

“We should quickly get our food and grab a table before they all fill up,” you suggest. You both bolt for the food, piling your plates high. Once content, Seulgi runs for the closest empty table, while you snatch two enormous unopened bottles of red wine, lord knows you’re going to need them.

Junmyeon and Nayeon stand in front of the table at the head of the room. Junmyeon is glowing, it’s the only way to describe the smile on his face as he embraces everyone that approaches him. As you watch, his gaze is drawn over to you, locking eyes. You jump, startled, and he chuckles before motioning for the both of you to come over.

“Junmyeon spotted us,” you inform Seulgi, who is slurping down an oyster. She nearly chokes. You pat her back a few times as she chugs some wine straight from the bottle.

“Alright, let’s go,” she coughs, rushing over to the star couple.

Junmyeon practically cheers your names at your presence. “Thank you for showing! I know it’s quite a distance from Seoul.”

He pulls Seulgi in first and you try not to study Nayeon’s reaction. You do catch her smile falter some before they separate. Junmyeon goes after you next, arms wrapping tightly around your shoulders, swaying you both before letting go.

“It’s so good to see you guys!” He continues in that gentle-like voice of his.

“Likewise,” you answer earnestly. It had been a long while since you last saw your friend. “Congrats on taking the plunge.”

“Thank you,” Nayeon says, wrapping an arm around Junmyeon’s waist. He tucks her under his arm and kisses her hair and you realize neither one of you have acknowledged her.

“Can you believe it? I’m getting married!”

“You are!” Seulgi cheers, a bit too excitedly.

“You were probably the most against it amongst us all,” you reveal, nudging his free arm and he laughs good-naturally.

“Yeah, but love can change your mind on a lot of things.”

You smile at his words, trying, as always, to not make this moment about you. It isn’t about you, not right now.

“So, where is the rest of the gang?” You ask, needing to change the subject. “I was sure Sehun would be here by now.”

“He’s here somewhere. I know that most of them just checked in, so they’ll be coming down a bit later.”

“Alright, well, if you see them let them know we’re here! We won’t keep you any longer.”

“Thanks again for coming,” Nayeon says as Seulgi and you retreat back to your discarded meals.

You pause once you see a broad figure in the seat next to yours.

“I knew it was your table because who else would have that much food on one plate? Not to mention the wine.”

You scowl and fold your arms. “Don’t be jealous we have fast metabolisms, Sehun.”

He laughs drily and meets your gaze through the dark strands of his bangs with mocking eyes. “Don’t flatter yourself, Love. You’re not as young as you used to be.”

You scoff and he breaks, laughing his signature laugh that can only be compared to a monkey’s, he at least tries to cover his mouth with his hand as his shoulders shake. You fight the urge to throw something at him.

“Are you going to insult me all night or are you going to give me a hug, asshole?”

He swiftly gets up from his seat, his long lanky body hovering over you as he draws you into a much-needed comforting hug.

“God, it feels so great to see you,” he gushes lowly into your hair before pulling away.

“I miss you every day,” you reply, not needing to say anything else for him to know what you mean.

Sehun moved outside of Seoul for his job a year ago and since then, you have only seen each other twice in person. It feels good to be around him again, he’s the big brother you’ve always wanted. He was always protective of you and for such a stoic individual, he opened up to you rather quickly, allowing you in during a time in his life when that wasn’t as easy for him to do. You did the same, and it brought one of the most meaningful friendships you’ve ever had.

He goes to greet Seulgi before heading over to the buffet with you trailing after him as he makes a plate, teasing him the whole time before returning to the table to finally begin eating.

“Can you believe he’s actually getting married?” Sehun asks, voice light in mild disbelief.

“It was definitely unexpected,” Seulgi chimes.

“He’s growing up,” Sehun, who is three years younger than the groom, sniffs. You rub his back comfortingly.

“He looks so happy,” Seulgi continues, attention given to the man of the hour. “I hope to one day be that happy.”

“Goals!” Sehun cheers sarcastically, causing Seulgi to cut her eyes to him.

“Shut up! I’m being serious!”

“I know you are.” He takes a bite and chews it thoughtfully, leaning back into his seat. “But you’re right. He’s, like, the happiest a person can get.”

“It makes me want to throw up,” you mutter, tasting that familiar sour sting of bitterness on your breath. Sehun glances over at you in concern, catching your words despite yourself, but doesn’t acknowledge it, instead continues eating.

A loud raucous gains the attention of all the attendees and you catch three guys colliding into a server carrying around a tray of flutes of champagne. Everyone and thing go crashing to the floor in a not so subtle entrance.

“I don’t know them,” Seulgi declares, shielding her face from the train wreck unfolding to save herself the second-hand embarrassment. The boys try to get back to their feet, but it takes time as they slip on the expensive liquid, legs tangling together as they try to save face.

Now is the perfect time to take pleasure in your friends’ mortification.

“Baekhyun!” Junmyeon hisses. “Jongdae! Jongin! What are you doing?”

The three—finally off the ground and bowing profusely to everyone around them—turn beet red as they approach Junmyeon with tails tucked between legs.

Your laughing only intensifies. Baekhyun hears it and immediately turns his head to glare at you. You’re mildly impressed by how easily he finds you, but then realize that’s pretty fucking hilarious as well and double over, stomach knotting almost painfully as you work it out with humor.

Junmyeon pulls them to the side and reprimands them quietly for a minute before sending them off. They trudge over to your table, inhabiting the majority of the empty seats.

“Well, that’s one way to make an entrance,” Sehun states. Jongdae throws his upper body on the table, arms sprawled out. His fingers nearly touch your food and you pull it protectively to yourself as he whines loudly.

“Jongdae stopped abruptly and we were too close behind him,” Jongin explains with a pout on his little lips and you’re instantly filled with pity towards the man. Jongin out of all people didn’t deserve that.

Sehun shakes his head. “I would say something, but it seems Junmyeon beat me to the punch.”

“He told us not to embarrass him further, or we’re out of the wedding,” Jongdae informs at the same time Baekhyun orders Sehun to ‘respect his hyungs’, before going for Seulgi’s bottle to pour himself a glass. She watches in dismay, not enjoying the fact that she’s now apparently sharing it.

As surprising as it sounds, both Baekhyun and Jongdae are the eldest friends you had in college, alongside Junmyeon and one other. Despite their age, they often acted like the children, getting you guys kicked out of many places with their loud shenanigans. Jongin is the same age as you, Seulgi, and Sehun. How he ended up with those two crackheads this day was beyond you, though you’re sending your regards.

“Are you hungry?” You ask him. He sits on Sehun’s right, but that doesn’t stop you from stretching out some noodles from your plate, drawing it to his face before he can even answer you. He smiles gratefully before taking a bite, humming in gratitude, and you have to resist the urge to coo at him. It’s actually hilarious because he’s a whole ass model! His nickname in school was Adonis, because, well, he’s beautiful. When you first met him, not going to lie, you had a crush on him, but the more you got to know the gentle, soft, teddy bear, the more your maternal side came out. Now, he was just a very well sculpted baby in your eyes.

“Where’s my bite?” Jongdae asks. Jongdae is an interesting character. As previously stated, him, Baekhyun, and—fine, no need to beat around the bush—Chanyeol were wild and free and lived without any boundaries. Yet, despite him being loud and always down for a good time, he was brilliant—one of your smartest friends—and observant. He loved fiercely and was always aware of his surroundings.

You shrug. “Make your own plate.”

“You’re mean!” He whines.

“You’ll give me a bite, won’t you, sweetheart?” Baekhyun tries his luck, tilting his head flirtatiously. Baekhyun was the mood setter. He has such a magnetic personality and can become friends with anyone and thing. You swear he was on a first name basis with all the professors—even ones he didn’t have. He is so funny, can leave you in stitches with a simple facial expression, and got off on making others happy. Despite being a social butterfly, he kept you all close, and made sure to let you all know that you were his family.

You don’t even spare him a look as you point in the direction of the buffet. You hear him tisk disapprovingly before Jongdae is smacking his shoulder, pulling him up so that the two of them can follow your instructions. Jongin scrambles after them once realizing they didn’t invite him and you chuckle to yourself as they try to shove him away, claiming that you can just feed him.

Nearly instantly, the seat Baekhyun was previously occupying beside Seulgi’s other side is taken.

“Yerim!” Seulgi shrieks, throwing her arms around her sister.

“Nice of you to finally show up,” you say, narrowing your eyes at her accusingly.

She has the gull to blush and grow shy. “I know, I know. We we’re supposed to go together.”

“Yeah, but I get the news that you found someone else to go with? And some boy, no less!” You place a hand over your chest. “I’m hurt.”

“He’s not ‘some boy’.” She rolls her eyes before perking up. “He’s a man.”

“Oh, you look absolutely smitten!” Seulgi purrs. Yerim’s cheeks flare once more and you realize that she does, indeed, seem to like this guy, even though this was the first time you’ve heard about him.

Yerim is four years younger than you and Seulgi, and despite knowing Seulgi throughout all four years of college and meeting her family a few times during that time, you didn’t really grow close to Yerim until her sister became your roommate. She spent an awful amount of time in your condo, and you now considered her a sister of your own. She isn’t very familiar with your college friends, because once she was introduced you all had kind of went your separate ways, but you and Seulgi thought it would be nice for her to come out to Jeju Island and meet the boys. That is one reason why you are kind of confused as to how she was able to, not only come here without you two, but bring a date as well.

“Well,” you begin, voice higher than usual. There was too much successful relationships going on around you lately. “Where is he?”

“He should be coming down soon. Have you all said hello to Junmyeon yet?”

“Yeah. Still in shock this is actually happening,” Sehun reveals.

You pinch the skin below his elbow, the closest skin you can access with his black button-down sleeves rolled up to his bicep and he yelps. “Nope. It’s real, bro.”

He ruffles your hair in retaliation and you allow it because he’s letting you off easy.

He gives his attention back to the newcomer as the three stooges rejoin, leaving two empty seats. “I’m Sehun, by the way. You’re Seulgi’s sister?”

She smiles politely and shakes his hand. “I’m the prettier sister I know, you can tell her.”

He’s visibly taken aback by her words, not expecting them, for Seulgi would never say something like that, but it’s only a second before he’s smirking, nodding appreciatively. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

She introduces herself to the other guys who do the same in return and you’re all chatting when a familiar voice chills your blood. “There you are!”

The body that belongs to the voice easily slides into the seat next to Yerim. “You saved me a seat.”

“Of course, I did, Honey.” She rests her much smaller hand over his that rests on her bare shoulder and you think you might’ve blacked out for a second.

The whole table goes silent as the newcomer finally checks out who he’s sat with.

Once you lock eyes, the color drains completely out of his face and the fear you feel reflects deep within his irises.

It is him.

Park Chanyeol.

~*~

It appears Chanyeol is in a predicament.

Yerim doesn’t seem to be able to feel the tension that just trapped the table as she proceeds to introduce him to everyone, oblivious to the fact there is no need for introduction. He sits there awkwardly, politely nodding his head, his lips rolling onto each other, stretched into a thin line as he gently pulls on his earlobe. Nervous ticks you remember all too well. Actually, the last time you saw him doing that was….

No. Now is definitely not the time to be walking down that particular lane of memory.

Instead, you absorb the present, taking a sick joy in how uncomfortable the six-foot giant is now that he’s weighing his options on how to approach the new situation he finds himself in. He can, one, pretend he has no recollection of the people he spent the most time in college with. Or, two, confess that he indeed knows all of you. Some—yourself—a lot more than others. You somehow think he might not want to disclose that particular tidbit of information to his current girlfriend who just so happens to be his ex fiancee’s best friend’s little sister. He doesn’t know that just yet.

“It’s nice to meet you,” he finally goes with, avoiding any kind of eye contact.

Sehun barks a dry laugh and you pick up the untouched bottle of wine in front of you, chugging the thing damn near empty. When you pull away, Chanyeol’s taking you in with concern, but averts his gaze when you meet it.

“So, uh,” Seulgi scrambles to change the atmosphere. “How did you meet?”

“Oh! It was straight from a K-drama!” Yerim gushes. You think you’re smiling, but it might be a grimace. Your eyes snap to Sehun to share a Look, but he’s too busy watching Chanyeol with narrowed eyes to notice. “You know how I work at that café? Well, turns out it’s right next to Loey’s studio! He’d always come in and order an Americano. After some time, we started talking and sparks flew! The wedding got brought up, and we realized we were both going, so decided to come here together.” She now turns her head to give her attention to Chanyeol, who has an arm thrown lazily on the back of her chair, turned towards her and he catches the movement, raising his eyebrows attentively and you nearly chuckle, realizing he hadn’t heard a word she just said. He smiles back at her though, albeit confused. “It was perfect.”

“Too perfect,” you slip. Chanyeol glances at you, a question in his eyes, and you try not to think about how fucking handsome he still is.

Didn’t Seulgi say he got fat?

Well, there isn’t an ounce of it from what you can see from his form-fitting—possibly, most likely, tailor-made—navy blue button down that molds deliciously over his firm arms and chest. It takes everything within you not to reach over and cop a feel, see if his skin is as smooth as you remember it to be.

Yeah, maybe too much wine?

“I told you, it’s like a kdrama!” Yerim continues, not catching your sarcasm in the slightest. She rambles on about the two of them, but you’re too focused on studying your ex, ignoring all the red alerts your mind has going off in an effort to get you to stop, adamant on how bad an idea it is.

His hair is a light brown, lighter than it was the last time you saw him, and is falling over his forehead, shiny and fluffy and soft. His face actually appears sharper, skinnier in some parts that leave you slightly concerned, wondering briefly if he has been eating well. You shake the emotion off quickly, not wanting to retreat back to old habits, not yet. His skin glows under the golden yellow lights as he laughs at something Yerim says and you nearly moan when he throws his head back, exposing his thick strong neck to you. God, you love his neck. He replies to her remark, but all you register is his deep baritone and grow misty eyed as nostalgia weighs heavy on your heart.

He is exactly the same, yet utterly different.

You hate it.

“So, Loey.” Baekhyun, Chanyeol’s best friend that’s sitting beside him, stresses the name. Loey is Chanyeol’s producer alias, but also the name he gives to those who aren’t very close. You fight the smile threatening to break out at how uncomfortable your friends are going to try to make him.

It’s what he deserves.

“What is it you do for a living?”

Chanyeol takes the time to pull away from Yerim, turning so that he is sitting straight in his chair, able to meet everyone’s gaze. He’s stalling, you’re sure, but he also struggles to not roll his eyes, knowing you all well enough to know damn well what game you are playing at. “I’m a music producer.”

The whole table ‘ohs’ dramatically. Jongin throws in a ‘that name sounds familiar, I wonder if I’ve heard any of your stuff’ for good measure and you nearly break. The table’s response actually does draw an eye roll from him.

“You guys haven’t cha—” He chokes on his words and Yerim doesn’t hesitate to give him a cup of water randomly at the table.

“Haven’t what?” Jongdae asks with an eyebrow raised challengingly.

Chanyeol’s gaze is steady as he comes up with a quick cover. “You haven’t told me how you all know Junmyeon.”

“We all went to college together,” Sehun answers easily. “Isn’t that how you know him? Loey?”

Chanyeol’s jaw ticks, and you watch, completely entranced by the show.

“Indeed,” he reveals through gritted teeth.

Yerim gasps. “You went to the same college as my sister?”

“Your sister?” Chanyeol asks, eyes wandering from Yerim to the now similar featured girl beside her. “Seulgi…?”

“Surprise,” she mouths with a wink and a pleased smile. Yerim’s facing away from her, so she doesn’t see, but Chanyeol’s eyes widen and Baekhyun and Jongin can’t take it anymore.

Laughter drowns the fancy orchestra as the table finally breaks, and you’re once again clutching your stomach, resting your head on Seulgi’s shoulder as tears pour down your face.

Yerim’s frightened and confused, eyes frantically taking in everyone, probably wondering the state of your sanity, all the while Chanyeol sits there, arms crossed, looking outright pissed.

She starts to finally piece enough to gather you are all laughing at her guest. She rubs his back reassuringly before glaring. “You all stop giving him a hard time.”

This leads the tables’ chortles to double, but the laughter leaves your system as soon as you zero in on their shared contact.

“No, no. She’s right, guys,” you say, influence strong enough in the group to get them to settle down. “We mustn’t be rude to her guest.”

Your chest is heaving for some reason, and you genuinely feel like you’re going to be sick. There’s a pressure on your leg and you check to see Seulgi’s hand gripping your leg reassuringly, and then Sehun’s hand comes up to pat your shoulder. They know. And it makes you feel better, more grounded to be around the people that know you best, especially during something as rough as this.

Yerim mouths you a ‘thank you’ and it annoys you for some reason. You didn’t do it for her. But did that mean you did it for him? That made you even more upset.

Now settled, you all go back to eating, quietly talking to one another, ignoring the couple as you all catch up on what you all missed.

Jongdae got a promotion at the hospital he works at and was now one of the main child delivery doctors. Baekhyun’s third children’s book is in production and is due to come out by the end of the month, he promises to send you all signed copies. Jongin is going to be heading to America right after Jeju for New York Fashion Week to walk for Gucci. Sehun’s . Seulgi updates you all on her current art exhibit and pouts that no one but you, Yerim, and Junmyeon have visited, and you let everyone know how your interior designing company has been thriving.

It gets quiet when the couple are the only ones not sharing their lives. Yerim scratches her head nervously, for she isn’t as successful as you all-hell, she was still a struggling college student! But, she didn’t realize, that the pressure isn’t on her, but in fact the man beside her. You all want to hear what he’s been up to. He’s a close friend, after all, but now that there have been boundaries set, it feels awkward.

“Chanyeol?” Finally, Baekhyun urges, letting him know that it is okay for him to share.

He lets out a breath of relief, glad none of you are angry with him and informs you all on how his beats have been selling and he’s been working closely with a giant kpop entertainment company. You all congratulate him, but you can’t help but be proud and devastated. That had been a huge dream of his—to share his music, and seeing that, not only is he sharing, but also getting the exposure he always wanted, well, you couldn’t be happier for him.

You open your mouth to genuinely congratulate him, but as soon as you do, the feedback of a microphone interrupts, gaining everyone’s attention.

Junmyeon stands in front of everyone now behind the table. Nayeon sits beside her fiancé, watching him dotingly.

“Hello, everyone,” he begins politely, like the CEO son he is. “I just want to begin by thanking you all once again for joining me and my future wife for our big day.”

Everyone cheers loudly for a moment.

“We are so excited to officiate our love and are even more grateful to have all of our friends and family share this milestone in our lives. We hope that you enjoy your stay here at the hotel, and open yourself up even more to love. Thank you all and can’t wait to see you soon!”

You all cheer and it seems to be over.

“So….” Jongin begins, taking in all the attendees leaving the lavish room.

Jongin, Baekhyun, Seulgi, Jongdae, and yourself say at the same exact time, “bar?”

~*~

Two hours later and six of you are huddled around a corner of the hotel’s bar, throwing back soju faster than the poor bartender—who you swear was wearing a necktie earlier—can pour.

“Iloveyouguysandmissedyousomuuuuuch~uwu!” Jongin slurs gleefully. You sling an arm over his broad shoulders.

“How did you say that with your mouth?” You ask. He throws his head back in a hearty laugh in reply.

Jongdae sits at the bar, his back leaning against the counter, facing the rest of you with his eyes closed, statue still, as if meditating.

No one disturbs him.

“Hey, hey!” Sehun, who now mysteriously has a necktie wrapped around his head like a headband, tries to collect everyone’s attention. Once he does, he lifts another full glass. “To Junmyeon!”

“To Junmyeon!” You all yell, throwing back your nth shot and making obnoxious noises from the back of your throat as the liquor burns.

“You’re all my bestest friends!” You cry. “Only the ones here! Everyone else!” You hiccup. “Everyone else, no.”

After a thought. “Except Junie. He can he a friend, too.”

“Chanyeol is out,” Baekhyun agrees with a pout. “He pretended I wasn’t his best friend.”

“Nooooo!” Sehun cries, as if he hadn’t been there to witness it happen. He’s standing beside you, his hips sway to a beat that definitely doesn’t match the song on at the moment, but stills at the mention of your ex. “Why would he do that?”

“I don’t know!” Baekhyun answers, truly destressed. “It has something to do with that bit—”

“That’s my sister!” Seulgi, who has been sitting silently beside Jongdae, finally shouts. “And it’s not her fault that he’s an asshole! We already knew that.”

You nod forlornly. “We did.”

“We did.”

You all cheers to that.

~*~

“This was not a good idea,” you grumble. You swear you’re actually on a ship that’s currently on rocky water, throwing you across the hall, bouncing off opposite walls like a ping pong ball.

Seulgi tried to carry some of your weight back, but gave up when your feet kept getting tangled. She appears a lot soberer than you. You could’ve sworn she drank as much, though she’s always been so damn good at pretending to take shots with you all when she wasn’t in the mood to actually drink.

“At least you don’t have to be at rehearsal tomorrow,” Sehun whines. His room is directly across from yours, so he’s trudging along, shirt already half off in his need to be in bed now.

“That’s true, I can sleep in!” You grow giddy at the thought. Your steps come to a halt when you see someone standing in front of your room.

“What is that?” You ask rudely, causing the person to turn towards you.

“Oh, it’s the pretty sister,” Sehun slurs mockingly, pointing at Yerim as she merely watches.

She takes the two of you in disapprovingly and, yeah, she’s pretty, even when she’s visibly upset. She zeros in on Seulgi and lets out a ‘thank god’ when she notices at least her sister is relatively sober.

“What’s wrong?” Seulgi asks, instantly in older sister mode.

Yerim huffs. “Everything was fine before that dumb dinner, I swear!”

Your ears perk at that as both you and Sehun lean against the wall beside his door adjacent where the sisters stand, giving them privacy, but also curious for details.

“What is it?” Seulgi presses, rubbing Yerim’s shoulder reassuringly.

Yerim shakes her head in annoyed disbelief, an angry grin stretches on her face and you pity whatever soul it is directed too. “Loey and I talked and he thinks it would be better if I roomed with you for the rest of the trip.”

Seulgi’s head jerks back as if Yerim’s words attacked her and you don’t feel any pity towards the culprit of the smile anymore, nor as drunk as you were a moment ago.

Sehun, on the other hand, still does and leans down to stage whisper a, “your Loey?”

You hush him in a rush, but don’t notice if Yerim catches his words.

“Of course, you can stay with us!” Seulgi assures. “My bed is big enough for five people!”

“That was the plan originally, anyways,” you chime in, catching the younger girl’s attention. She smiles gratefully at you.

“Thank you, guys,” she says. “I’m sorry to be such a bother—”

“You’re not!” You reply, a tad too fiercely.

She blinks at you before drawing out an, “okay….”

The hallway starts spinning again, so you rest your head on Sehun’s bony shoulder. “Me head hearts, Cap’n.”

“Why are you talking like a pirate?” He questions.

“Aren’t we on a ship?”

Seulgi calls your name, gaining your attention. “Let’s get you inside, Sweetie.”

“That’s my que!” Sehun slips from under you and you go toppling to the floor. He doesn’t even spare you a glance or checks if you’re all right before he’s stumbling into his own room, the door clicking quietly behind him.

You don’t even have the energy to cuss at him, your head now throbbing harder after coming into contact with the carpet.

Arms bring you up and drag you into the softest fabric you’ve ever felt and you melt into it with a pleasurable moan.

“I’ve never seen her this drunk before.” You hear somewhere above you, but can’t remember how to access the part of your brain that will open your eyes. “She’s funny.”

“She’s had a…hard day,” another voice defends gently.

“I know that’s right,” you’re able to gargle through the detachment.

“Her and I both.” There’s a sigh and the sound of someone sitting. “This isn’t how I imagined this trip going.”

“Did he say why he wanted you to stay here instead?”

“There’s only one bed. That’s his excuse. He didn’t think we were at the level to be sharing one. But, oh, how convenient that my sister is staying here as well, maybe it would be better if I roomed with her instead.”

“But what if I hadn’t been here?”

There’s a pause, you imagine it’s probably a shrug, since it isn’t vocal.

“It doesn’t make sense to me either! The thing that pisses me off the most is that we’ve already been to the room. I put my stuff away. We were excited about it, claiming it was perfect. But after the dinner…. After the dinner, it’s suddenly a problem.”

You shoot up from wherever you are, startling the two girls.

“Room number?” You demand, voice threateningly low.

“Wh—what?” Yerim asks, shook.

“Room number.”

“You’re not going to talk to hi—” Seulgi is cut off by Yerim’s resolute, “609.”

Your sharp eyes cut to Seulgi. “Aren’t we 613?”

Seulgi nods, face full of warning.

You shrug.

“Be back, Mateys,” you assure, closing an eye for good measure.

You’re gone in a flash. Lead filled legs stomping the two doors down to what was once Chanyeol and Yerim’s room.

As soon as you face the gray rectangle, you square your shoulders and begin banging on it with all your might.

It opens after around fifteen bangs, you nearly knocking an annoyed Park Chanyeol in the chest from your momentum.

His irritation melts instantly when he’s met with you. You’re sure you are the last person he expects to be knocking at his door so late at night.

You both seem to pause and you take a moment to just…stare. It has been so long since you were this close to him. You take in his attire—a plain white-T, some unfamiliar cute Christmas pajama bottoms, and bare feet. His dark hair is in a wild mostly dry state. You swear he hasn’t aged a day in the last three years and it infuriates you further.

“What…what are you doing here?” He finally breaks down to ask, tone resigned.

“I came to defend Yerim’s honor,” you declare. You smirk, impressed by how sober you sound.

Chanyeol lifts an eyebrow and leans against the doorframe. His left hand holds the door open and you try to ignore how long and veiny his arm is. “Are you drunk, Mel?”

So, maybe you don’t sound as sober as you thought.

“Look. One, don’t call me that, Loey. Two, yeah, I am drunk, that doesn’t change the fact you’re an asshole!”

“Wow,” he drawls out, irritation leaking into his voice. “I didn’t expect this to be the first conversation I’d have with you in three years.”

“What?” You snap, quirking your head. “You didn’t expect our first conversation to be about your current girlfriend?”

His jaw works at your words and he’s looking above you, shifting his weight uncomfortably.

“I’d have to move on eventually, right?” He asks tersely, still avoiding your gaze.

His words simultaneously sadden and enrage you, but since there is no room for pity, you take the latter.

“If you’re moving on,” you say quietly. “Then why did you kick her out of your room?”

Your question draws his attention, and he searches you. Eyes taking in parts of you. “You look good.”

You scoff. “Is that an answer?”

He shrugs. “No. But it is the truth.”

“You… look good too,” you acknowledge reluctantly.

“You think so?” He asks quickly, as though the answer is important.

“I mean,” you shrug and close your eyes tightly. “You haven’t changed a bit. I can’t tell if that’s a good thing or not. Regardless, stop distracting me by changing the subject.”

He inhales deeply, letting it out through his flared nostrils, but you’re still too in your head to peek at him.

“You want me to stay on subject?” He asks skeptically. “In that case, maybe I asked her to leave because I felt this trip was going to go differently than I had originally planned. I’m not sure if her being in here is a good thing anymore.”

“And why is that?” You ask in a breath.

“Did I mention you look good?”

“You don’t want to tell me?” You gather and throw your hands up in surrender. “Fine. It’s your business, after all. We can go back to pretending we never met, let alone fucked. I think I prefer it that way.”

You begin to retreat, but before you can take a full step back, Chanyeol is snatching your wrist.

“Wait,” he sighs, giving in to your trap. You smile slyly before making the mistake of lifting your head to lock eyes with his. It has been so long since you were this close to him. His wide eyes always gaze down at you so earnestly, always open for you to read. He’s searching your face as well, getting lost in the plains he once knew by heart, reacquainting himself with your beauty.

You swallow the saliva that pours into your mouth, transfixed by his lips, so soft and wet looking and pink and full and tempting. He really is one of the best kissers, so good at knowing exactly what you like and—

“Why did you bring her?” You ask, voice a broken whisper.

“Will you remember this?” He asks in return, reaching out gently to brush some fly away strands of hair from your face.

You shrug, not completely sure yourself. “Try me, I guess.”

It’s an answer he will not like and that’s why you phrase it that way. To get a rise out of him, to make him push you away because you were getting lost at sea and needed the shove.

You expect a frown, a snarky remark, and a door slam to the face.

Instead, his warm hand tightens around your wrist, dragging you into the threshold of his room, bringing you a mere breath away. He uses your shock to lean down, bringing you more at eye level.

It is now his turn to grin slyly.

“Maybe I brought her because….” Did his nose just bump yours? Was one of his fingers slowly running up your stomach? His breath smelt like fresh mint, like toothpaste, not a scent for desire, yet here you are. “Because I knew you would be here.”

His words are like a sharp jerk of your boat throwing you into the dark dangerous depths of the angry freezing sea, and the past three years flash before your eyes as he watches, taking in every emotion that runs across your features.

“I hate you,” you say, voice chillingly low.

He straightens at that, retracting all contact and stepping further into his empty room. You swear his eyes are sad as he goes to close the door.

“I know,” he answers before leaving you alone in the dim hallway.

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myinconnelly1 · 4 years ago

Text

Without Hesitation

Word Count: 1,034

Pairing: Penelope x JJ

Author’s notes: after watching the Episode “Penelope” I was instantly inspired to write the following Fantasy/’medieval’ AU based on the episode. It has taken me almost a year to actually write it, but “The spirits have done it all in one night” as it is said. So please enjoy!!!

Warnings: Canon violence, character death (in line with Canon)

“We aren’t gonna let them marry the princess to that guy right?” Spencer asked Aaron. Spencer was a young knight, but a smart lad nonetheless. Sir Aaron Hotchner was the head knight in charge of his royal highness’s daughter, Princess Penelope.

“You haven’t met him yet,” Aaron said as they watched an overly self-assured lord introduced to the royal family. All the knights in charge of the Princess, the BAU as she liked to call them, knew something was wrong with this particular unidentified subject of a foreign land, they just didn’t know what.

“The band has given the King less of a reason to not marry the princess to a certain lord,” Derek said looking from Hotch to Jennifer. The lady looked away from the other knights.

“We can’t keep everyone away from the princess,” David said.

“Oh I can try,” Emily said without humor.

“Cut it out,” Hotchner silenced them all with his steeling cold gaze. They all stood and watched the formalities of introductions before the king allowed the festivities to commence.

“I have a perfectly logical reason to make sure this guy never sees her again,” Emily said as she came around to Hotch. “Squire Kevin gave me this.” She handed him a small bound journal.

“He’s planning to attack the princess here,” Aaron asked unamused. “Emily, I know you and the rest of the Band Above Uprising don’t want the princess to marry the wrong person, but this is a little extreme.” Hotch held the book up to her as Emily drew her gaze away from JJ.

Hotch, I’ll take the first round of the perimeter guard,” JJ said leaving her mostly untouched plate of food and grabbing her crossbow.

“The king will never approve the marriage of the Princess to someone on her honor guard. We need to see the obvious and find a good match for Penelope.” Aaron said acknowledging JJ as she left. The Lady Jennifer walked to the hallway and gave one more longing look to the Princess seated at the head of the Dining Hall before making her way through her patrol.

“We didn’t fake this, I truly believe the princess is in danger. He could be getting ready to attack her at any time,” Emily said quietly as she leaning close to Hotch.

“If that’s the case then we should move to take him down,” Derek said darkly.

“No,” Hotch seemed to make a decision. “There are too many people here. We don’t know how he is going to attack Penelope, we need to split up. Emily, Spencer, and Derek go surround the princess, make sure there isn’t an angle that he could take on her that we wouldn’t see coming. Dave you and I will attempt to apprehend this Jason Battle,” Hotch said the name that the young wizard’s apprentice had given Emily. They split nonchalantly, but it was soon obvious that there was no good way to get the drop on Lord Battle. The Band’s nerves were shot as the night continued and they tried not to give away their plan to anyone who was watching.

JJ was coming back up on the dining hall and she was finally going to tell Penelope that their relationship was never going to be accepted by her father. The king and queen were benevolent rulers but the Princess would never marry her guard, especially if that guard was a woman. Aaron had made that very clear as she had walked away from the table. But as she was about to turn the corner she saw the Band had taken up tactical positions and looked very clearly distressed.

The center of their attention was on the Lord who had come to court the princess. JJ felt a slight buzz in her mind and recognized the strange magic of the wizard's telepathy.

Lady Jennifer, the Princess is in danger and BAU cannot bring this to a close without significant casualties. They want you to get reinforcements.- Kevin

She would bring reinforcements, she thought ruefully to herself, and knew that Kevin would most likely hear this message as her response. She pulled out her crossbow and loaded the bolt before getting the best angle she could on the Lord Battle.

“AMBUSH!” A woman screamed from inside the banquet hall as she saw JJ with her crossbow. The rest of the BAU pulled swords and Lord Battle turned to look at her as he pulled an illegally concealed weapon on her.

“JJ,” Penelope whispered as the princess seemed to understand what was going on. She despised violence but forced herself to watch what she was putting her love through.

Jennifer squeezed the trigger on her crossbow without a second thought and the bolt impaled itself in between the eyes of Lord Battle before any kind of further violence could ensue. She gave her weapon up to Hotch as would be procedure and then went to Penelope.

“I’m sorry you had to do that,” Penelope said gently as she hugged JJ.

“For you, there was no hesitation,” Jennifer said pushing hair out of Penelope’s face. “Your Majesty,” JJ said as she knelt in front of her king. “Please accept my hand as a suitor for the princess.”

Hotch would think later that if Jennifer was ever going to have a chance to win the princess, calling in the debt of his daughter’s life was probably the only one.

“This has never happened before. A knight cannot just vie for the hand of a Princess, let alone a knight in that same princess’s service. Lady Jareau had you been a Lord and asked for my daughter’s hand I think I would have given you a chance. However,” The king was cut off with a hand from the Queen.

“Lady Jareau, you have shown exceptional bravery and selflessness towards the princess and I think in this instance it might be alright for some of our old rules to be bent a little. Jennifer stood shocked and trying to process the information as Penelope wrapped her arms around her love and kissed her on the lips in front of everyone.

The princess’s Band Above Uprising applauded their mistress and her lover.

@waywardbaby @destielhoneybee @snffbeebee @deangirl7695 @spnbaby-67 @maddiepants @ladywinchester1967 @woodworthti666 @miraclesoflove @tumbler-tidbits @emilyshurley @akshi8278 @mannls @wendibird @bobasheebaby @chelsea072498 @donnaintx @justsomedreaming @supernaturalenchanted @kalesrebellion @prettydeaneyes @emoryhemsworth @dontshootmespence @its-a-spn-thing @vicmc624 @idreamofplaid @anaelsbrunette @lovealways-j @kickingitwithkirk @wayward-mikaelson @electraphyng @mariekoukie6661 @katelynw93 @deandreamernp @thoughts-and-funnies @lyarr24

#criminal minds #Penelope x JJ #penelope garcia #jennifer jareau #aaron hotchner #dr. spencer reid #david rossi #derek morgan #emily prentiss #penelope #medieval AU #canon violence #slight canon divergence #character death

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gunterfan1992 · 4 years ago

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Episode Review: ‘Obsidian’ (Distant Lands, Ep. 2)

Airdate: November 19, 2020

Story by: Jack Pendarvis, and Kate Tsang, Adam Muto, & Hanna K. Nyström

Storyboarded by: Hanna K Nyström, Anna Syvertsson, Iggy Craig, Mickey Quinn, Maya Petersen, James Campbell, & Ashlyn Anstee

Directed by: Miki Brewster (supervising), Sandra Lee (art)

Of all the many colorful characters in Adventure Time perhaps none has a more elaborate backstory than Marceline the Vampire Queen. In many ways, Marceline really was the writers’ gold goose, engendering complex story after complex story. By the time the series ended, the vampire’s life had in more ways than one been woven into the very fabric of the show’s mythology.

But because I am a Marceline fanboy—whose zeal for her majesty is rivaled perhaps only by Glassboy himself—I always felt like the show could have done even more with her backstory; I mean, when the series finale aired, there were still plenty of questions that had yet to be answered (What happened to her mom? What is Simon going to do now that he’s “cured”? How did Marcy and Bubblegum meet? Were they romantically involved before the events of the main series? How did it all go south?). Nevertheless, when "Island Song” played for the last time at the end of “Come Along with Me,” I forced myself to push aside this minor, fannish grievance and applaud the show for writing such an excellent character. I didn’t need for every last detail of her life to be explicitly shown on screen. I was happy.

But then, about a year ago, news dropped that one of the Distant Lands specials would really delve into the history of Marceline and Bubblegum’s relationship. In an instant, I tossed my stoic “I-am-satisified-with-what-I-received” mentality right out the window. We were going to get another Marceline episode, and it was going to dive back into her elaborate backstory!?! I could barely contain my excitement as I waited for the episode to drop.

Well, was my excitement worth it? Or was “Obsidian” a big ol’ let down—a tragic victim to grandiose expectations that were never meant to be fulfilled?

I’m quite happy to say that not only was “Obsidian” a remarkable special in its own right, but it is arguably one of the strongest episodes of Adventure Time, period.

The plot of this episode is fairly standard, as far as Adventure Time episodes go: Glassboy (a new character voiced by Michaela Dietz, the voice of Amethyst from Steven Universe) accidentally sets a giant fire monster named Molto Larvo loose on the Glass Kingdom, and Marceline and Bubblegum—who we learn have been living their best cottagecore life together in Marcy’s cavehouse—are forced to save the day. But the series’ writers take this otherwise quotidian adventure idea—a story which, at least on paper, could have easily fit in during any of the show’s many seasons—and employ it as something of a Trojan Horse, using it as a pretense to delve into both Marcy’s traumatic childhood and her and Bubblegum’s romantic history. And, boy, is it a ride!

With regard to the former story thread, the audience learns that sometime after the Mushroom Bomb detonated, Marceline and her mother, Elise (voiced this time not by Rebecca Sugar, but by actress Erica Luttrell, who played Sapphire in Steven Universe), roamed the wastelands in search of shelter; after Marceline’s mother came down with some sort of sickness, she sent Marceline to be on her own. Elise was hoping that this would spare Marcy the trauma of seeing her mother die before her very eyes, but due to some communication issues, Marceline never learned what became of her mother. As such, Marceline began blaming herself for “leaving” her mom to die in the wreckage of the world. This plot thread is perhaps one of the bleakest that Adventure Time has ever explored, and the show does it masterfully, balancing the darkness (e.g., Marceline’s mother coughing up blood) with bright spots of comedy (e.g., the "wazzup” dog) that never feel distasteful.

Likewise, when it comes to the story thread about Marcy and Bubblegum’s romantic history, the special does not hold back. We get to see “Bubbline” at its best and its worst. I have a feeling that the word “fan service” is going to be used by a lot of folks when talking about this episode. As the AV Club writer William Hughes notes, this word is usually hurled around like a pejorative, but it aptly describes the appeal of “Obsidian”. After all, this episode really is “fan service at its finest”—not only does it give the ravenous shippers the story tidbits that they have so long to see (e.g., the moment Marcy gave Bubblegum her rock shirt, Bubbline’s epic break-up), but—and this is very important—it does so in a way that is fundamentally meaningful. “Obsidian” does not feel self-indulgent, unnecessary, or pandering. On the contrary, it is overflowing with deep emotion that allows us to better understand how Bubblegum and Marceline really feel about one another. Sure, over the centuries that the two gals have bummed around Ooo, they have bickered and fought, but deep down, their love is passionate. In many ways, it is like the titular obsidian, which means that nothing short of an enchanted diamond pickax is strong enough to break Bubbline apart for good.

(It’s also quite nice that after seasons and seasons of tip-toeing around the question of Marceline and Bubblegum’s sexuality, “Obsidian” can explicitly focus on their life together, showing the two characters cuddling, kissing, and dancing. In terms of LGBTQ+ representation, it’s a huge leap forward, and I’m so happy that Adventure Time has had a part to play in normalizing queer relationships!)

Marceline episodes almost always featured a catchy diddy, but "Obsidian” really cranks things up to 11 by featuring a whole bevy of catchy songs, several of which are perhaps among the show’s strongest. The first right banger, “It’s Funny,” is the song that plays over the special’s credits. With a grunge-meets-riot grrrl feels, this track really sets the tone for the episode, signaling to the audience that we’re in for, as Lumpy Space Princess once put it, some “drama bombs.” The next standout is “Woke Up,” a brutally honest diss track that Marceline used both to contain Molto Larvo and break up with Princess Bubblegum centuries prior to the start of this episode. This song was written by pop rocker Zuzu, and it—as the kids say—slaps. Layers of fuzzed-out guitar and digitally processed vocals are used expertly to sell Marceline’s emotions and convey how, on the surface, she’s delighted to no longer be under Bubblegum’s romantic spell... even if her heart may not be so sure.

But arguably, the musical jewel of the entire special is “Monster,” a somber ballad that Marceline sings to Bubblegum when they find themselves trapped in the collapsing furnace and are facing what they believe is certain death. Written by indie pop artist Half Shy, this song is, in many ways, something of the inverse of “Woke Up”: soft, happy, and filled to the brim with a sort of love that few are lucky to receive and even fewer can honestly express. Not only does “Monster” finally cement Marceline’s real, visceral love for Bubblegum in song form (remember: almost every prior Bubbline song was either indirect or delivered by an angsty, heartbroken Marceline), but it also “tames” Molto Larvo, allowing him to metamorphose into a strange but harmless cat-butterfly critter. Just like “Come Along with Me,” “Obsidian” proves that the power of love and music will save us in the end—if not physically, then at least emotionally.

Regarding the production-side of things, there’s a lot of praise to doll out. First off, the look and style of “Obsidian” is gorgeous. While “BMO” opted to experiment somewhat with the classic Adventure Time art style, trading cel shading for an almost watercolor feel, “Obsidian” echoes the aesthetic of the original series. That said, there’s an undeniable animation bump—likely courtesy of that sweet, sweet HBO money—that lets Ooo and its denizens shine in all their glory. You can tell that Adam Muto, art director Sandra Lee, supervising director Miki Brewster, and all the members of the production staff really went above and beyond the call of duty. The episode's soundtrack, composed by Amanda Jones, as deserves a shout-out. Jones did an excellent job mixing the chiptune style of the original series with a bass-heavy rock sound that highlights Marceline’s starring role. Bravo!

As another production aside, I should point out that CN/HBO’s decision to make these specials each 44 minutes was the right call. The 11 minute format of the original series often left something to be desired when it came to plot development, as many an important episode was forced to end somewhat prematurely due to time constraints; conversely, the 8-episode miniseries format that the show experimented with during its latter days sometimes felt like too much time (Stakes, Islands, and Elements all had whole episodes that felt like nothing more than the show treading water). The length of “Obsidian”, however, was just right, giving us plenty of time to take in what was happening without ever feeling like it was dragging.

A final aspect of this episode that is worth mention is its many call-backs to previous episodes and characters. “BMO” was mostly a self-contained story that, due to its nature as a prequel in space, really couldn’t reference the Land of Ooo without feeling forced. “Obsidian,” however, throws in everything and the kitchen sink (Adventure Time superfan and all-around cool person Jagm has collected most of them here for those of you who want to see everything laid out nicely). Stand-outs for me include Choose Goose (someone who we really haven’t seen since season five) smuggling sketchy products into the Candy Kingdom, post-Ice King Simon trying his hand at open mic nights, Bronwyn as an adventurous hero, and Finn the (Adult!) Human complete with beard and scars! Of note, Jake does not appear in this episode, except as a tattoo on Finn’s chest. Many in the fandom are now speculating that the events of “Obsidian” take place after our beloved shapeshifting dog’s death. Oh say it ain’t so! Perhaps we’ll learn more in “Together Again.”

Mushroom War Evidence: Unlike “BMO,” which directly referenced the Mushroom War and its fallout (both literally and figuratively), this episode returned to the show’s roots by featuring gobs of explicit hints in throw-away lines or elaborate background pieces. Honestly, there is far too many to list here in a pithy paragraph, but some major references include: the reveal that the Glass Kingdom, like the Fire Kingdom, was created by ‘magic’ blaze from the heavens (almost certainly a nuke); the fact that Marceline and her mother wandered for a time in the debris-filled wastelands following the apocalypse; and the reveal that Marceline spent at least part of her childhood holed up in a bomb shelter surrounded by the bones of myriad dead humans. Honestly, while references to the Mushroom War have always been sad footnotes to an otherwise cheery show; in this episode, however, the references are very graphic, illustrating the sorrow and horror of mutagenic war.

Final Grade: As I said earlier, I’m a Marcy fanboy, so I’m horrible biased, but I don’t care. This episode rocked. Q.E.D.

#adventure time #atimers #adventure time distant lands #distant lands #atdl #obsidian #marceline the vampire queen #marceline #bubblegum #princess bubblegum #bubbline #adam muto #hanna k #hanna k. nyström #jack pendarvis

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sanoiro · 4 years ago

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Lucifer 5x09 - Family Dinner -Spoilers & Speculation

Written by Joe Henderson

Directed by Nathan Hope

Nathan Hope has directed

1x02 - Lucifer, Stay. Good Devil 1x13 - Take Me Back to Hell 2x01 - Everything's Coming Up Lucifer 2x07 - Trip to Stabby Town 2x10 - Quid Pro Ho 3x05 - Welcome Back, Charlotte Richards 3x19 - Orange Is the New Maze 5x07 - Our Mojo He will also direct Episode 2 or 3 of S6

Behind The Scenes Video

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Ignore the fact that I accidentally watermarked it with the number 519...

The Case & Deckerstar

Now we can start with the case of the week.

The murder happens at Golf n Stuff which is rather popular due to the scenes that were shot there for The Karate Kid. Rafferty was actually giddy over that.

So we have a murder. After over 70 episodes we know that the case of the week is somehow connected to the main plot and that it leads to a resolving of Lucifer’s issues or at least a small or big breakthrough.

The victim in this case was burned to death or at least he was… charred. A bit like how Mum ‘enlightened’ Jared in 2x17 but worse.

(In order to make sure most bts are included I have put them in the same file in their original resolution and you need to open the image and zoom. You can do it from your PC, MAC or mobile)

The mini golf has several fun statues like knights and pirates but what was not supposed to be there was the figure at the hole where nearby the victim was found. To be more You might have guessed it has many teeth by the photo and the answer is, it’s a reddish dragon head.

Back in December I came across the props building it and I thought it was cool but I wasn’t aware it was for Lucifer as the account is not affiliated with our crew or production. So imagine my surprise when a friend told me about what she had seen on the lot and going through the archived bts I found the victim photo as well.

You may have noticed it but in two particular episodes more dragons made their appearance. First it was at the second showrunner’s office in 503. There we see a dragon impelled by a sword, it seemed really out of place but I then correlated it with Baphament’s blade which is a representation of Azrael’s blade.

Later on I saw something else. In 508 Pete’s apartment had shelves dedicated to dragon figures as well as some knights. All along I was wondering can I even meta about that? What can it symbolise if it means anything at all? For some reason all I could think was the movie ‘Dragonheart’.

But let’s assume they have laid some hints, so far we have seen that they go very basic on bible and comic material so it’s funny how dragon-like Lucifer was presented in Series 3 of the black label of DC/ vertigo. But there are also more tidbits.

Now in 1x12 you all remember the Angel who was defeating a very Lucifer-looking Satan?

That was a prop. But it is derived by the work of Guido Reni ‘Michael and Satan’ (1636) Who was in turn influenced by Raphael’s painting ‘St. Michael Vanquishing Satan’ (1518) and if we go to Raphael’s early works... St. Michael (1504-1505)

Anyways!

The investigation of this ‘week’s’ case has its usual suspect chase which leads us to an arcade where we can spot some members of the crew doing rounds with the go-carts on that location. What I do know is that we are looking for someone young as far as guest posts go but other than that not much is known. The case seems to be progressing slowly but at some point the murderer appears to want to skip town so the leads bring us to L.A.’s train Union Station.

We also have scenes at the precinct during the case as we have seen from Aimee’s bts but not much is known there.

Now the suspect might be played by the elusive guest of this episode John Clover whose appearance was posted on Reddit and had sparked the first speculations over the title of the episode.

We should now wonder whether the theme of this episode’s case which takes us to gaming areas has anything to do with how Lucifer views his Father’s appearance in the mid-season finale and whether it will provide him with a resolution to not act in a rush way. The same after all happened with Mum.

Do not forget that Lucifer in Season 2 and especially at the beginning with Mum and when he thought Earl Johnson was his Father, Lucifer’s plans changed as his vengeance turned to a slow paced questioning over why their relationship deteriorated.

For an Angel who was ‘forced’ - not yet clarified so let’s not take that for granted- to punish the guilty Lucifer seems to be more merciful, understanding and open to explanations in the long run especially with the people who wronged him. Amenadiel, Michael, Uriel, Azrael, Mum, and Earl ‘God’ Johnson.

As Amenadiel said in the Pilot Lucifer away from Hell showed restrain and mercy… Perhaps it is true that we cannot escape from what we truly are. In any case that’s meta talk!

Back to the Union Station.

In the train station we have a bts where we can see Chloe and Lucifer chasing the suspect and from the photos and videos outside of it we can safely say they are successful on apprehending the murderer.

Now a funny incident was that during the shooting the area was closed to the actual travelers but somehow a Japanese tourist ended up sitting where the background actors were. No idea if it was her Pizza or it was given by the craft service but the girl was obviously bewildered on what was happening. It’s the little absurdities of life I guess…

It seems though as a lighthearted episode at first...

Do not be mistaken, the writers, cast and showrunners have revealed that in S5P2 we enter the emotional and equally dark (In P1 I missed the darkness aside from Pete of course) part of this season. It means that by the end of 5x09 as we roll on the last minutes of this episode, Lucifer is heavily conflicted and a resolution is needed, one that seems to be somewhat provided.

Since P1 I thought it would be weird to have Deckerstar break up for effect, in order to break us, especially since S5 was supposed to be the last season and S6 is effectively from what they imply (again cast and showrunners) an epilogue. So do not expect Deckerstar to break up but on the contrary as we saw Lucifer and Chloe in 507 they pull each other back up.

It is why I’m wondering what will be unraveled after the arrest of 5x09’s murderer.

The end of the episode takes us at night to L.A.’s Grand Park. The Grand Park is across the City Hall by the way, and for the Christmas season it was decorated with a Christmas tree made out of light bulbs.

In the bts the prominent colour of that tree is deep lilac. That’s where our next Deckerstar moment will unravel. We should also be ready for the Lucifer Universe to acknowledge yet another holiday of the human world, Christmas!

A tiny break here but you should remember that on each side of the elevator we have two bronze plates depicting the transfer of Christ after he was taken down dead from the Cross. So in the most discrete of ways Lucifer’s Universe has acknowledged Christ and perhaps it was because before the Sumerian text set Amenadiel as the favourite son, in Season 1 and for the majority of S2 we knew Lucifer as the favourite one.

On the cross Christ (no I didn’t write Lucifer at first :P) according to the scripts in a moment of lapsed faith “Father, Father why do you abandon me?”. In a way we might meta that for 516 but also for what Lucifer has experienced so far and has so eloquently expressed in 3x11 and in 1x09.

But back to the Deckerstar moment…

It takes place on the ‘balcony’ above the fountain as the purple Christmas tree is behind them. The setting happens at night and provides the place for our characters to talk, to open up and perhaps even express certain fears but also be urged to take advantage of the current circumstances.

From my perspective is the scene of a couple that talks a difficult matter but at the end of that talk they know each has the other’s back so they can step forward, take that chance and their partner will always be there to catch them if they fall. It is also how we will experience Lucifer finally opening up without Linda probing him. But whatever comes forward also gives space to truths and a realisation which will break our Devil as we have seen from the bts of the next episodes.

We might even have an understanding why ‘I love you’s’ are difficult for Lucifer and for Chloe to also realise that. We might even get Lucifer to say it. Here is to hoping…

On a final note. Maze in this episode seems to have gone MIA but many times we do not see the bts of every scene so all we have is Lesley-Ann’s bts from her trailer during that time. Also do not forget how things ended in 508. Maze did betray Lucifer and with God on Earth...

The Dinner

This episode is expected to open back to the precinct. The reason is because it is a mid-season finale which means that the in between scenes are not implied but also because of some spoilers we had back in December.

As you remember the actress who played officer Cacuzza had posted on Twitter that she and Lauren were in a ‘very small’ room which had just been painted. That room we can safely say is the ‘evidence room’ and that Cacuzza managed finally to find a way to close the surveillance in order to take a nap.

Now do remember that back in S4 Cacuzza was also the officer who let Lucifer ‘sample’ the drug busts… I’m not sure if that will come back somehow but we do know that Cacuzza will appear later this season, whether alive or not is yet to be seen.

What we do know is from the clues that were given by the actress.

1) She will be in the same room as Chloe meaning we will revisit the evidence room once Dad arrives and perhaps it will be a comic moment? Perhaps a random human will figure things out? But what was interesting is that according to the bts photo we see the actress and Lauren in their own clothes while Dennis is in his ‘Dad/God’ clothes.

2) Both Chloe and Officer Cacuzza were supposed to act distressed and shaken. If we take the ‘I love you’ element from that scene for Chloe let’s remember that the evidence is suddenly a bit of a mess. A glass has broken, the sound and effect will be heard once the time has started running again and they are two cops in a room with no idea of what is happening outside. So perhaps the shaken and distressed effect comes before they open the door (or walk out) and are sure there is no imminent threat.

3) In my opinion in this episode Cacuzza has some lines no matter how brief they might be.

Now the question here is how to proceed.

We obviously have a Family Dinner from which only two bts exist.

If we assume that the Family Dinner is arranged after the brothers have hid their wings and then Dad has met Linda then the dinner is set up by a very flabbergasted Linda.

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I do expect Linda to bow by the way and for this dinner to bring some elements from 1x10 Pops. For this speculation I’ll include the video of the scene from that episode and I’ll try to tie them up with 5x09.

All the episodes in P2 are meant to do a full circle and the writers have based most of their storytelling on the events of S1 and S2.

So first the spoilers of what we know from 5x09 and then the ties we may find with 1x10 and some more past episodes.

The 11 minutes are quite long but is it really all things concerning?

Henderson tweeted that there will be 5 actors but as we know know Ellis plays two characters which is why the dinner scene may have taken three days to shoot so we should count six people at the Dinner Table.

The location will be (most probably) at Linda’s house as we have seen from a bts that her main table is full of different varieties of fruits and food in an attempt to recreate an Olympian affluent meal. For Linda is only normal to be out of her element and try to impress God. So far she has been almost killed by his ex, has a child that can be snatched away to the Silver City if she is not deemed worthy perhaps or even because of Charlie’s half genetic code.

Remember there was a stand in actor for Michael

The problem Linda also faces is that she has supported Lucifer. Yes, he is her friend but how will God react to that? Having a human siding with His rebellious son? Linda as it has been written knows how far pissed off celestials can go and I’m sure she remembers Lucifer’s agony and fear over his Father where Chloe was concerned. So she tries, really tries to present a wonderful setting for the grandfather of her child.

So we do have Linda in the mix. Obviously God, Amenadiel, Lucifer and Michael. That makes us five characters and four actors. Little Charlie also makes an appearance as far as I’m aware as the twin babies were on set and that also contributes on why the scene took so long to be shot. However the babies do not count as the sixth character. Chloe though does.

In short we have:

Linda

God/Dad

Amenadiel

Lucifer

Michael

Chloe

and

Charlie

Another thing we should take into account for this scene is Rafferty’s posted script page of the midseason finale.

While Amenadiel and Lucifer appear shocked and in awe, Michael seems rather pleased. I mean he literally ‘Grins with excitement’.

Amenadiel in 5x03 said that the only one who was talking to the throne meanwhile Henderson as far as I remember in one of the post P1 interviews, revealed that God and Michael have a relationship that Lucifer wishes he had with Him. D.B on one of the virtual cons (or ET interview. I have issues with keeping track of them now) have said that the scene at the family dinner would be gut wrenching and absolutely fall down hilarious’.

So in this dinner we will get to know our characters more and as Ildy and Henderson have said Lucifer will go back being a 14 year old at the Thanksgiving table. That perhaps is the reason why the script episodes 510 and 511were reversed. The last time that had happened was in S1 in order for Lucifer’s vulnerability to not come too soon in the season. In the case of these two episodes I believe it has to do with Lucifer’s emotional state but also the constant collisions he will have with his father in the Family Dinner but also during the Musical episode.

Another aspect to consider is that if 5x09 reminds us a lot of 1x10 -Pops right now and 5x10 the Musical episode is directly influenced by 2x16 - God Johnson.

The next section will now be dedicated to a quick recap of 1x10 - Pops and the possible connection to Michael and his story.

Michael in 5x09 teases Chloe as she is kept captive that there is a bigger plan and ‘Spoiler Alert’ it will be EPIC. That can be left alone as a promise to see more of that plan in S5P2 but before we go forward we should also go back in 2x04 - Weaponiser.

Do you see the parallel? How far Uriel’s view of the ‘Patterns’ could go was always a meta I couldn’t crack. Sure Michael hinted as per one Anon hinted on Tumblr that Michael might have been the one to urge Uriel on Earth to kill Mum and hopefully Lucifer as well. It is also perhaps why we were reminded of Azrael’s Blade in 5x03 - Diablo with Baphament’s blade, the only blade that could kill the Devil. Perhaps that was Michael’s plan back then but it didn’t work out.

But is Michael the big villain? According to the showrunners no. There are more things happening but Michael has a reasoning, has a story, one that explains his deformity and is the hero of his own story as all the other season ‘villains’ so far were. Mum, Amenadiel, Malcolm, Kinley, even Cain.

What the Interviews say about Michael:

Beginning with the parallel between the dinner we had in 1x10’s dinner and plot, and in what may have in episode 5x09 I would like to remind you-

- at this point I have censored some spoilers, not speculations, spoilers for episodes of P2 that will not be added in the S&S -

I’ll return to this topic and explore it thoroughly as the S&S are written but for now remember that 1x10 might tell us more than what we think right now and it might take us as a point of reference even up to 5x16.

Between 1x10 and 5x09 we can also wonder what are God’s intentions, can we attribute them all to Michael’s manipulation or it goes beyond that because the showrunners have promised us an emotional P2. I do believe issues are addressed and Lucifer will have to come face to face with some hard truths without that meaning that Dad was always right.

In the Pilot - wait.. Pilot? Yes, 5x09 is an episode that slowly builds us to the very end. There are spoilers and references that need to be addressed from past and future episodes before and after 5x09.

We need to address that in the Pilot, Lucifer told Delilah the very truth he uttered to Linda where he was concerned in S4 (4x08). God has nothing to do with your mess. Like Delilah, Lucifer was putting the blame to others, circumstances and even questioned God. He was wasting his eternal life and his talent, which he eventually found in crime solving.

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On cue we get to the scene with Chloe asking God what she is doing to a bar with Lucifer. And what follows is Chloe telling Lucifer how she saw things differently from everyone and she paid for it. That story for me at least rings a bell.

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We still do not know why Lucifer was cast out, the actual reason. No matter the sexescapeding with Eve or the rebellion what was the core of all that acting out as Linda called it in season 2? Whatever it was if we go back to 3x11 we will see that Chloe in the Pilot is basically Lucifer in 3x11.

They feel alone, misjudged and while Chloe tries to move on and later in S1 finds what actually happened, in Lucifer’s case he gives up on waiting for forgiveness from his Father until Michael comes, and tells him that even his Fall was a manipulation.

In Pops Lucifer asked something very interesting what did the sous chef wanted? And the answer was to surpass Pops. I do wonder if that’s what Lucifer wanted in a way and of course Michael on Lucifer’s expense. Two ‘children’ fighting for attention but only one was groomed to take over.

Speaking of taking over at the end of the episode of 1x10 we learn that Pops despite what Junior had done still had his son in his mind for taking over the restaurant. Pops believed in his son but allowed him space to grow eventually when everything failed.

If you remember Zadkiel’s spoiler we see that in 5x15 for some reason Lucifer wants to re-join the Host. That aside from a reconciliation shows that like Junior, Lucifer for his own reasons - we do not know what has happened but we will go back to that in the S&S of 5x15 - wants what divine power has to offer.

What happens next is again interesting -censored-. I just want you to see how we do not deal with standalones but everything progresses towards a point, a familiar yet innovative point for the series.

In episode 2x01, Lucifer asks mockingly an offended Chloe who did she thought he took after, his Dad? That happened because Lucifer believed to have taken more after his mother but as we know genetics is a funny thing, Celestial genetics even more so.

God’s absence from Lucifer’s life shaped him. He did drove Lucifer to become something he wasn’t but after 4.5 seasons can we claim that Lucifer and God are nothing alike?

Maze I believe was spot on on the similarities God and Lucifer held.

Lucifer believes in justice, in truth and is able to love. He has been more of an Angel than any non fallen Angel has ever been so far.

Amenadiel tricked a dead human to kill Lucifer thus condemning him again in Hell however as we know from Charlotte’s case a redemption was not impossible.

Uriel wanted to kill his mother and wouldn’t hesitate to kill Chloe in the process. Azrael is basically a liar and manipulator, Remiel would gleefully cut open a human for their half-celestial baby while Michael is really-really messed up.

So what has happened?

Like with Junior, Lucifer was pushed by his Father to become the man he is today. And Lucifer likes what he is, who he is because he sees the change and is even afraid of not being real when that change is questioned or exposed to him.

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The same happened with Amenadiel, once he decided to embrace humanity and brotherhood. He changed for the better and became more ‘angelic’.

So yes, Junior’s story does apply to Lucifer on many levels. But Junior didn’t have that dinner with his Father, Lucifer will as they will do two more of his siblings. Some will be hurt, some will feel betrayed and some may walk out.

Which brings us to a very big question.

Was Mum truthful when she said to Lucifer, his Dad wanted to destroy him? If the answer is yes, how will both deal with that? Because Lucifer may have not totally believed Mum.

If that answer comes to play we should consider it as the common question children come forward to when they learn they were not planned or their parents had opted at first to have an abortion. The fact that they didn’t get on with the abortion or had willingly made a child does affect their feelings towards that child now? Do they regret it? Do they want what that child has become?

These are all tough questions and sometimes the answers are not easy either. Mainly because humans like celestials with human emotions as it seems, are secure and balanced only with the totality of a circumstance. Everything or nothing, the rest in between are not welcome and it’s bound to hurt.

Finally, on this 1x10 weird reminisce. Can we say that Lucifer will be allowed in the end to create something that represents him? I think he may but more about that in 5x16 S&S.

Probably the story will not end with redemption but with Lucifer finally becoming his own person one that resembles a lot of Dad and Dad may accept or even encourage that path. That does not mean he will start anew though

Which brings us back to the adversary of 1x10 - Pops. The sous chef believed that Junior was not worthy of his father’s tolerance and reward so she made sure to destroy his reputation and went as far as trying to kill him. That sounds a lot like Michael.

Michael’s speech towards Maze about what was happening in the Silver City in 5x02 did echo the sous chef words:

So we should wonder if Michael will succeed to a point to ruin Lucifer’s chances and leave Lucifer live with the consequences in the end as our hero learns to move on from whatever injustice happened or the writers will provide a catharsis.

And a final question here… Is Amenadiel really the favourite son? I somehow doubt that, perhaps I’ll be proved wrong as in many interviews Henderson has gone back to Amenadiel’s arc as he learns he is the ‘favourite’ and so far he has not said anything to contradict the belief 2x17 brought to us with so many translated Sumerian words.

But as we said teh Dinner will not be cathartic on the contrary so does that mean that Lucifer eventually walks away? Probably.

At the photos that were posted near Christmas we have two bts one crystal clear and the other more hazy which shows Lucifer at the Penthouse and Dad being there in his white cardigan. I do suspect that meeting at the penthouse happens after the dinner but it does not resolve things between Father and son. it is also possible that it’s why we need the very emotional scene from the musical to be moved forward and 511 script to become 5x10 aired episode.

Perhaps the comment on it’s not just Lucifer who hits the keys was referring to Dad and not Maze in 5x01.

Although we cannot be sure on what will happen in the penthouse and whether Scarlet was meant to join that scene or simply was on set for the day (highly probable) for another scene, we do know that in this episode we had a LUX night. A most perhaps unconventional one.

By this point you know that the writers are ready to address everything or at least make parallels and so somehow we have one with 1x09 - A Priest Walks Into A Bar. This time however it is seems like God Walks Into His Son’s Bar.

If the camera is clear enough we can see God (?) talking to a white person. I would have loved it if it was Dan but I cannot tell for sure.

Whether that visit happens before or after the family dinner I believe it may happen before as the clothes Dennis wore at the lot around that time were different from the white we saw him appear with in the end of 5x08. Of course that does not say much as we will see Dad in the same/similar white clothes in at least three different episodes in Part 2.

Therefore in the conclusion of this S&S we should speculate that the Dinner is placed at the middle of the episode and a resolution is reached for Deckerstar in the end of the episode but Lucifer’s turmoil did fit better through the musical episode hence the change.

#lucifer season 5 #lucifer season 5 part 2 #lucifer S5p2 #Lucifer - Family Dinner #Family Dinner #Lucifer spoilers #lucifer speculation #lucifer S&S

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asian-hero · 5 years ago

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Emergency request May i ask hdcs momo realising that her femcrush was a child abused by her father(verbally and physically)during a girl's night where reader says that she does not want to have children (because she is afraid to be like her parents). she has a crush on momo but is afraid of a relationship because she thinks that she risks to mistreat her as her father did with her mother. it's actual questions i can't stop asking myself so ... if you're unconfortable just ignore it. thank you.

A/N: Even though I may not know you, the fact that you question yourself on whether or not you would be a bad parent/partner to someone is proof enough that you would never be the way your parent was. It’s understandable that you’d be scared that you may end up hurting the ones you care about most, but please remember that your parents aren’t a reflection of you, and you can grow and develop and be your own person in the world, one that can bring warmth and kindness to everyone around you, please remember that ❤️

It was rather rare that you and the rest of the 1-A girls would have a girl’s night all to yourselves

I say this because, whenever you all try to have one, one of the boys will barge in and demand they be apart of it, and that they feel left out. Pretty soon after, the entirety of 1-A is sitting out in the common area, as you all had to migrate out of whatever dorm room you were in due to the sheer amount of growth your group had

Finally, though, the seven of you are finally able to have a girl’s night without the interruption from any of your other classmates. It was a nice way to just unwind with one another and talk about all the things that have stressed you out, made you laugh, and anything that’s happened to you during the day

If you were completely being honest with yourself, you were mainly excited for these nights with just the girls because you could hang out with Momo without anyone questioning your motives

This was a great excuse for you to hang out with her, but not have to deal with all of the unwanted emotions that would occur if it were just the two of you

As much as you liked her, you felt that she could do so much better than you, so you never wanted to risk anything, and, in the end, you sort of ended up avoiding her. So, these girl’s nights gave you the perfect opportunity to be near her without having to deal with the consequences of it after

While you’re busy being in a heated discussion with Ochako about what flavor of mochi is the best, you don’t notice a certain pony-tailed girl looking your way

It was fairly obvious to everyone else, or at least to all of the girls, that Momo had the biggest crush on you. She would stare at you when she thought no one else was watching, and would just admire your beauty. As cliche as it sounds, she found that you were most beautiful to her when you were in your natural state. Whenever you were talking to your friends, with the biggest grin on your face as you laughed at one of their jokes, she’d find herself being unable to breathe. She could honestly watch you for hours and never be bored of it

Of course, she never really acted on her feelings, mainly because she felt that you were uncomfortable around her. Whenever you two were alone, you refused to look at her, and you’d only talk to her when she asked a question, and even then you’d only answer her in short tidbits. While it hurt her feelings, Momo couldn’t find it in herself to confront you about it. Perhaps it was because she was scared of the answer that would come, or maybe it was the fear that you wouldn’t answer her at all, and then she’d just be standing there all by herself

So, she resigned herself to just watching you from afar, taking happiness from seeing you look so happy with the others. After all, she knew that she’d be able to hang around you during the few girl’s nights you all had, so she’d hold out until then

After a while of talking about your school work, how annoying a certain purple haired boy was, and how you all feel you’ve progressed with your quirks, you had landed on the topic of the future: namely, about your future families

Mina was the first to talk about her future, saying that she wanted to find someone who was strong, kind, and funny. She also went further into her future life, saying that she wanted a wedding by the beach, and wanted to wear a pinkish wedding dress. After her future wedding, she’d want to start having kids immediately, stating that she wanted at least two little ones

After her came Toru, then Ochako, then Asui. Even Jirou had participated in the conversation, albeit a bit reluctantly. Eventually the conversation had found its way to you, and you couldn’t help but feel self conscious, wanting nothing more than to just fold in on yourself to escape the questioning looks of your friends

You took in a shaky breath, attempting to calm your nerves before saying that you weren’t sure you wanted any kids, much less a relationship. Immediately, as you’d predicted, you were bombarded with questions of “why?” and “are you sure you want to shut yourself in like that?”

While you already predicted that they’d react like that, it still didn’t make you feel any better to be proven right

You merely shrug your shoulders, trying to play into the nonchalant role, saying that you just weren’t really interested in having kids, and that really, you’d be doing your imaginary kids a favor, as if they’d been real, you weren't sure that you’d be the best parent

Once again, you were silenced by the other girls telling you that you’d be a great mom, and that anyone would be lucky to have you, and while it felt great hearing that, you couldn’t really imagine a life like that for yourself

As you felt yourself spiraling into dark thoughts about yourself, it was Momo who saved you. She put herself in front of you, scolding the others for pressing the subject when you were clearly uncomfortable.

While the others were apologizing profusely after realizing how uncomfortable you were, Momo was taking you to her own dorm room, telling the others that you’d both be back soon

In all honesty, you really wanted to tell the others that it was fine, and that you were just “overreacting,” but the words wouldn’t come out of your mouth

Once the two of you reached her dorm, she pulled you onto her bed, sitting across from you, waiting for you to say something. After a few more seconds of silence, and the realization that you weren’t going to speak, she sighed, leaning in closer to brush the hair away from your face

“You know, if there’s something bothering you, you can always tell me,” She started, before pulling her hands away, “I won't tell anyone.”

With just those few words, you felt everything pouring out of your mouth: about your childhood and how your father had been abusive in every sense of the word, how all those years of torture had led you to wanting to be a hero in the first place, as you didn’t want anyone else to live like that, and how those years had damaged how you saw yourself and the world, and that you didn’t feel like you deserved to be happy

She doesn’t interrupt you as you stumble your way through your sentences. Instead, she inches ever so closer, and pretty soon she’s enveloping you in a tight hug, holding your head against her chest

Tears that you didn’t know were there started to dampen her shirt, and you try to push yourself away, with a meek attempt at an apology, but she refuses to let you go, only moving back slightly to stare directly into your eyes

“I’m sorry that you had to deal with all of that by yourself. You didn’t deserve any of what your father did to you, and I promise you that you’re more than deserving of all the good things in life. Please don't ever say that you’re less than, because I can assure you, if there was anyone in the entire world who deserves kindness and love and warmth, it’d be you”

She pulls you into her chest again, this time burying her face into your hair, trying to conceal the tears that were beginning to form in her eyes. With a shaky voice, she speaks again:

“I mean, it’s not like you’re hard to love, either. I know that all the girls love you, and so do the boys, even Bakugou,” She laughs, rubbing her cheek against your head, “Though he’d try to deny it.”

Her voice grows softer, almost as if she weren’t sure of herself, “I love you too, you know.”

You lift your head up, a curious look on your face. Even though your mind is filled with such opposing emotions, and your self doubt hadn’t gone away, you couldn't help but ask:

“As a friend?”

She sighs once more, shaking her head. That’s all the signal you need to realize one thing: somehow, Momo had fallen for you. Despite you pushing her away, not talking to her, she’d still found herself growing to love you. Even though you never once showed much of an interest in even being her friend, she loved you nonetheless

It was a thought that both excited you and terrified you. So, you did the only thing that came to mind: deflect. Scoffing, you turned your head to the side, not wanting to look her in the eye

“You can’t be serious,”

She tilted her head, a saddened look crossing her features, “Would it truly be that bad if I loved you?”

When you didn’t respond, she gently cupped your cheek, forcing you to look at her

“I know it’s hard for you, especially with all that you’ve told me, but I know that you aren’t like that,” She squished your cheek, “You aren’t your father, and neither am I. So, will you please give me a chance? Let me prove to you that love isn't as scary as it seems to be”

It was hard to deny her when she gave you such a cute expression. Still, you frowned, burying your head into her shoulder. “I’m not sure if I know how to love,”

She smiled, rubbing your back. “Don’t worry about that, I’m more than willing to wait for you,”

As the two of you sat there, finding comfort in one another’s arms, you couldn’t help the small warmth growing in the pit of your stomach. What was it? You weren’t really sure. Did it scare you? Of course it did, but you knew that, with Momo, you’d be safe

When the next morning came rolling around, the rest of the girls had checked to see if the two of you were okay, and instead of finding the worst, they found the two of you snuggled up in her bed, with your head resting upon her chest, and her arms wrapped around you protectively, as if trying to shield you from the world

The girls shut the door lightly, and they refused to let anyone near the two of you for the rest of the day

#bnha #mha #bnha imagines #mha imagines #bnha x reader #mha x reader #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #momo yaoyozoru #yaoyorozu x reader #yaoyorozu momo #yaoyorozu momo x reader #momo yaoyorozu x reader #momo x reader

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im-the-punk-who · 4 years ago

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Hey, I was wondering if you have a book rec

Okay so in full disclosure, I have a really hard time reading books. My brain sometime around six years ago just decided that wasn't its style anymore, so I don't read a TON. A lot of these aren’t going to be recent releases. However, here are a bunch of books I would absolutely recommend checking out! I tried to include a variety of genres but I have uh.....five bookshelves in my apartment so if you're looking for more of a certain genre let me know!

Theatre:

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead - Tom Stoppard

Waiting for Godot - Samuel Beckett

These are my two favorite plays - they're both absurdist, humorous, and have some fun things to say. They’re both by old white guys but like....I love both Tom Stoppard and Samuel Beckett DEEPLY and they have all of my love and respect.

Non-Fiction/Educational:

Why are all the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria by Beverly Daniel Tatum - this is considered a 'classic' on the psychology of racism, and was particularly helpful for me as a white person in arming myself against 'reverse racism' thoughts and in dissembling my own prejudices. This is mostly a rec for other white folks, but Tatum also addresses 'having the courage to sit at the black table' as a way of claiming your own identity outside of the stereotypes the dominant society expects of you.

Daring Greatly by Brene Brown - Okay listen I just really REALLY love Brene Brown, she is a therapist most famous for her TED talk about Vulnerability and this is just...listen I really like to read this book when I am sad and feel like shit because it makes me feel strong. I reread this book at least once a year.

Imagined Communities by Benendict Anderson - This is an absolutely fascinating read on the rise of nationalism. It’s a bit dry and wordy, but the ideas and use of history as propaganda, spinning the story of a nation to pit it against or on the same side as other nations, and the ways in which these tactics shaped cultural history is just!!!! Amazing.

Gay New York by George Chauncey - This is just one of the most informative and interesting reads of queer history in New York that I’ve ever come across. It’s one of the ‘must reads’ of queer history and has so many interesting tidbits that I have to recommend it. It’s a bit old(published in 1994) but I still find it relevant and interesting to read.

Personal Fiction/Autobiographical Fiction

White Girls by Hilton Als - I went to a reading of this book when it first came out. It was so much fun and so eye-opening for me as a baby queer in NYC that I bought the book there. I wanna be really clear that Als does not pull punches and a lot of people don’t quite like it, but I love Als’ style of writing. The stories and essays in this book are amazing and funny and heartbreaking and informative of queer experience - particularly black queer experience - that I always feel like...honored? to experience through writing? This is one of those ‘you’re gonna suffer but you’re gonna be happy about it’ reads - it can be hard to face because of how very hard the pills are to swallow but like....gosh I just love this book and it’s interesting and hilarious and great.

Confessions of an Economic Hitman by John Perkins - this is my tin hat favorite. It hits....ugh. This is one of those books that came out and like every government agency freaked the fuck out over it. It’s an interesting look into the quote-unquote dark underbelly of capitalism; how and why countries manipulate each other through economic policies. Super interesting read with a nice style of prose.

The Know-It-All: One Man's Humble Quest to become the Smartest Person in the World by A.J. Jacobs Okay so full disclosure I have not finished reading this, but I’m far enough through to rec it. This book chronicles the author’s attempt to read the entire Encyclopedia Brittanica from front to back, and it is just as kooky and hilarious as it sounds. I am very incredibly and deeply offended this author stole both my schtick and my initials, thereby preventing me from doing this exact thing. I read through the phone book in its entirety when I was three. I had it in me. Anyway, this is basically the author just listing weird interesting facts he’s read about and connecting them to his daily life, but it’s a fun read, and you learn a lot of totally useless facts, which is absolutely my jam.

When Skatboards Will Be Free by Saïd Sayrafiezadeh - HI I LOVE THIS BOOK. I’ve read it maybe three times over. It’s so fun and interesting. You may notice that a lot of the books I rec are very absurdist in their humor, and this is no exception. This book is full of the dry wit and just weird goddamn shit you could only expect from the child of a revolution that never came. You want to read a book about someone who Went Through Shit? Read this book. It’s funny and heartbreaking and just. AHHHH. Seriously I cannot recommend this enough.

Hyperbole and a Half by Allie Brosch - FIGHT ME ON THIS. I love this book.....so much. Yes it’s technically a comic book but the stories are so INTERESTING and hilarious and full of exactly the dry absurdist humor I eat the fuck up. Also! Allie Brosch recently released a sequel of sorts called Solutions and Other Problems that I recommend without even reading it.

Poetry

Pansy by Andrea Gibson - IF YOU ARE NOT READING THE POETRY OF ANDREA GIBSON WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING WITH YOUR LIFE. I cried seven times reading this book. There are only like 14 poems. Please please read this to break your own queer heart :)

Bloodsport by Yves Olade - This is a tiny book full of absolutely devastating poetry. Most of it has to do with the grief of relationships, but like....gosh I love all of Olade’s stuff. (Also!! This is available as a pay-what-you-wish pdf!!)

Bright Dead Things by Ada Limón - This book focuses a lot on the author’s experiences of loss, and knowing that loss is going to happen. I’m completely devastated every time I read this.

Science Fiction/Fantasy

The Bartimeaus Sequence by Jonathan Stroud - So what if I am a dumb millennial I love this series. It’s another dry and deadpan humor, with weird additions and Stroud’s use of footnotes to absolutely crack me the fuck up means I gotta rec this. I just gotta. Four(I think?) books following the deeply unlikeable Nathaniel and his Djinn Bartimaeus, who just wants to eat humans and have a deeply enjoyable enemies to lovers plotline with his arch rival.

The Magic's Price Trilogy by Mercedes Lackey - Okay I know I’ve recced this before. I will rec it again. This was the very first series I ever read that featured a gay protagonist and I was. Devastated? Reformed? I latched onto Vanyel Ashkevron and I am never letting this depressed emo boy go. Try me, I bite. Seriously, this book was released in the 80s and yet it is still relevant, I still cry - god i LOVE this series SO MUCH. And, MERCEDES LACKEY actually invented unbury your gays, sorry I make the rule on that one. :) Also there are magic talking horses??????? Seriously please read this series I love it so much.

Fire Bringer & The Sight by David Clement-Davies - This is another series that was absolutely formative in my baby lexicon. These are books about magical animals and their inner societal workings and both books address the ideas of good, evil, darkness, compassion and good will, and destiny. I am obsessed with these books, they are some of the most interesting of the genre I’ve read, and so incredibly intricately written. LOVE these books.

Vampire Earth Series by E. E. Knight - The Witcher before it was cool. Sort of but like...there are schools of Cat, Bear, etc and it has COOL VAMPIRES I LOVE THSI SERIES. Basically, earth has been taken over by a race of alien ‘Vampires’ and follows a human involved in the resistance. The writing in this series is...wow. It’s so intricate and interesting and involved. I own the whole series because I love it so much, including the after-series hardback novels. I’m so messy and I love it.

Kindred by Octavia Butler - You know how people are like ‘YOU SHOULD READ OCTAVIA BUTLER!!’ ? You should absolutely do that. This novel is mindblowing and interesting and the pace and narrative are so so so interesting. Heartbreaking, god, horrific. Butler is an amazing writer and this novel, while my personal favorite, is not by any means the only of her books I would recommend. STORIES. STORIES!!!!!!!

Fiction

The Ballad of Barnabas Pierkiel: A Novel by Magdalena Zyzak - This book is so fucking good. It’s imaginative, funny, intelligent....it’s honestly one of the best fiction novels I’ve ever read. Again, dry, absurdist humor, this book sort of reminds me of Terry Pratchett’s style of writing.

The Call of the Wild by Jack London - This is a classic, a true classic. The social commentary of this book is so so good, London’s style flows and, personally, as a dog and animal expert, the anthropomorphisation of Buck and his fellow animals is just so well done. I love this book, it’s quite an easy read, and I reread it at least once a year.

Rolling the R's by R. Zamora Linmark - Okay. Okay okay!!!!!! I gotta take a deep breath about this one. This book is. Yuh. This is a bit younger leaning than the other fictions, focusing almost entirely on high school level characters, however the experiences and commentary is just so so good. Focusing on a diverse group of characters growing up in Hawaii in the 1970′s, this book addresses the intersectionalities of gender, sexuality, race, immigration, education, and how we define who we are. I’m obsessed.

A Separate Peace by John Knowles - A heartbreaking novel about war, innocence, adolescence, and how we hide from our truths. It’s...so good, this book hurts me a LOT okay. The prose is phenomenal, the story is poignant, and it feels like I’m ripping my own heart out with a fishhook every time I finish it.

The Toss of a Lemon by Padma Viswanathan - This is one of those books I half recommend because it’s so good, and half because of the deep wealth of knowledge it presents the reader. The author’s use of her own culture is just....goddddddddd. Intricate and interesting and so delicately included in the narrative that you can feel the love the author has for it. It’s a long read and it took me almost a month to get through reading every day, but god. It’s so soft and amazingly written I both wanted to read it all at once and take my time with it. This is another one that deals with the duality of humanity and how we connect with one another. Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!

P.S. Your Cat Is Dead by James Kirkwood Jr. - I love this book I love this book I LOVE THIS BOOK. It’s fucking hilarious, entertaining, I literally laughed out loud at every single chapter. Hilarious and poignant and surprisingly deep, this book literally follows the journey of a man in which literally everything that could go wrong does. It’s fucking hilarious.

I hope that helped and gave you some new books!!! <3

#long post #book recs #milo writes

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invisibleinorange · 4 years ago

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Chapters: 8/? Fandom: Bridgerton Rating: T Warnings: Presumed Character Death Relationships: Colin Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington, Eloise Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington(besties), Bridgerton Family Dynamics, Simon Hastings/Daphne Bridgerton Characters: Colin Bridgerton, Penelope Featherington, Eloise Bridgerton, Anthony Featherington, Benedict Bridgerton, Portia Featherington, Violet Bridgerton Additional Tags: Bridgerton, Polin Summary: Unexpected bad news arrives for the Bridgerton Family (and friends) regarding Colin's travels. This will be a series that is set after "The Duke and I" or season one of the show. It is a companion piece to "Goodbyes".

It would seem that Viscountess Violet Bridgerton could not wait for the arrival of Duke or Duchess's much anticipated bundle of joy to add to her family.

It is reported Lady Portia Featherington seems to have finally rid herself of one of her daughters. While this Author, cannot be certain of the circumstances, it has been reported that not only has said daughter has been seen coming and going from Bridgerton family home quite frequently but household staff have been spotted with taking personal effects from one home to the next…

LADY WHISTLEDOWN'S SOCIETY PAPERS, 30 SEPTEMBER 1813

A few short weeks ago, she’d been practically dragged back to the home to warm up and get something to drink. The next thing that she knew, Violet Bridgerton was telling her mother in no uncertain terms that she wouldn’t be returning home that night or ever if she didn’t desire it.

Penelope had been appreciative to sleep in a guest room, to feel part of an actual family at their meals and to have a mother in her life that actually saw it fit to care about what she wanted.

She was never judged for reading a book and more often than not she encouraged to have more to eat. She’d taken to barely eating in her own home to attempt to stave off comments that implied she was some sort of a pig. She never felt shamed for just existing here.

It was becoming increasingly hard to imagine ever going back even if she knew she inevitably would have to. This wasn’t her family and she didn’t want to become a burden to them.

No one felt that she was a burden though.

Her presence had managed to bring some small joy to a mood that was very much morose. They’d managed to memorialize Colin without his body and it had helped them. The house still smelled of the flowers that once filled it but the wake had passed and his brothers had handled the delicate matter of religious ceremony.

Even though the grief wouldn’t entirely fade away, they were all weren’t standing still anymore. They might have all still been in black but there was the slightest glimmer of joy there. The dark clouds that had enveloped them for weeks seemed to be leaving.

Penelope felt a bit guilty for starting to think that things could actually be okay.

Benedict hadn’t exactly bridged the subject since the night of his failed proposal.

To say that he was surprised when his mother had all but moved the girl into their home would have been an understatement. He had spent the first few days waiting for something to be said but he had the sneaking feeling she was avoiding being alone with him and while she never indicated anything was amiss at family meals, the fact she wouldn’t meet his eye said plenty.

Anthony had advised him to leave it be for now. Eventually things would boil over and they could make another go of it. Was it really smart to let her integrate into their family like this only to eventually leave it? Surely, she didn’t intend to stay there, unmarried for the rest of her days. It was hypocritical to think when he didn’t particularly mind if he ever did himself but still, there was concern.

After pilfering a cigarette from his Eloise, he’d stepped out to smoke it. A part of him wondered if he could slip away, spend the evening expressing himself in the only method he knew how: his art. Everyone else was starting to act like themselves again and he just felt useless.

Long legs swung in front of him cigarette moving between his hand and his mouth as he let his mind drift between the various things he currently saw as shortcomings.

“I owe you an apology,” he heard before he even realized he wasn’t alone anymore.

His eyes flickered up, finding Penelope standing there in front of him. There was something determined in her voice like she’d been building herself up to even speak to him. He was caught so off guard at an apology that he wasn’t about to argue it.

“You don’t,” he told her simply, gesturing to the vacant swing, welcoming her to join him.

In some ways, this was most inappropriate but he didn’t think there was anyone who would say anything. He’d spent plenty of nights sitting out with Eloise and talking about their lives but Eloise was his sister. Penelope, as much as people seemed to have forgotten, wasn’t.

“I do,” she told him honestly. “I just want you to know that it’s not you that I’m against.”

He stubbed out the cigarette, deciding to focus on the conversation at hand. His jaw tightened slightly but his eyes softened. There were plenty of reasons that he could think of for her aversion to his proposal but it was at least nice to know that he wasn’t the offensive part of it.

“Do I dare ask what you are against?” he couldn’t stop himself from inquiring.

“Entrapment, sympathy - I love your family and while I know I’ve always been closer to others within it, I respect you too much for that,” she confessed, giving him a valid reason.

“It’s not entrapment when you go into it with your eyes open,” he said honestly. “I stand by my offer though I know I cannot force you into it. Surely, the past few weeks have made you see that you belong with us though.”

It felt a bit like a betrayal to nod at the words but Penelope knew nothing he was saying to be a lie and Benedict for his part meant it. Penelope did feel like part of the family.

“I don’t need to be married to you or anyone else to be part of it though,” she said after an extended moment of quiet. “I know that you think the certainty that such a marriage would offer me but you would be miserable.”

“You say that as if I won’t be miserable regardless of who takes my name,” he said with a shrug. He had the find the balance between sincerity and areas where he might find himself in danger. “If I could change places with Colin, I would in an instant but I cannot do that. If you would only consider my proposal though you would see that I could be more than kind. You would be financially cared for -- you would have freedom to do as you please. Most importantly, you could officially become part of our family. Remove any potential stain from this … estrangement with your family.”

It was a hard bargain to turn away but also one that made guilt bubble up in her.

They were doting on her, making her part of their family and they didn’t even know that about the money she had hidden away. She had more money than she would ever need to independently care for herself. With everything happening in recent weeks, Lady Whistledown’s identity hadn’t been a topic of conversation. Penelope didn’t even know how she’d continued to write about little tidbits she managed to hear through it all.

“I have to confess something,” she finally said after a long moment, deciding that perhaps it was time to unburden herself. She could tell Benedict and maybe then he could understand. Maybe once he knew he wouldn’t even think the prospect of marrying her was such a good idea anymore.

“I’m listening,” he told her clearly prepared to hear her out.

“I’m –“

The words were cut off and anything she intended to saw after wouldn’t have been heard. Eloise had apparently decided to come look for the both of them and thought it would be funny if she pretended to be someone chastising them for breaking the rules of society.

“You know that you shouldn’t be alone without a chaperone,” she said, making a mockery of the whole thing, crossing her arms as she played it up. “What will people say? They might think that you’re corrupting our house guest, Benedict.”

It was Benedict who rose from his seat, shaking his head to make room for his sister to take possession of his swing.

“I’ve been trying but I’m afraid she isn’t as debauched as you and I, Dear Sister,” he said musing Eloise’s hair with his hand. “Maybe you’ll have better luck.”

He did pause before moving to depart in order to address Penelope again.

“We can finish this conversation some other time but think about it,” he said with a nod and then he was gone.

Any prospect of revealing her identity as Lady Whistledown went out the window.

"Well now that he's gone I can steal you away. You have a package," Eloise advised.

Penelope certainly wasn't expecting anything.

#⚜ writings — polin #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #bridgerton

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hykwkagas · 4 years ago

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Review:

Kurosawa Toru - Her Love in the Force

MS2 - Falling in love + Epilogue

Ratings-

Plot: 4/5

Romance: 5/5

MC: 5/5

Total: 14/15

Oh boy, did I went into this with lower expectations having read his MS1 earlier but it might be because I did that I found myself really enjoying the latter half of his route. His MS2 was nothing short of suspense, and it was truly a roller coaster ride. I’ll tie in all Epilogues with the MS2’s as I think it concluded their overall routes better. As usual, spoilers below. P.S I’ve yet to read His POV yet.

Plot: 4/5

The story starts with MC having supposedly wreck her head about how to deal with the one night stand she had with Kurosawa, and it does take a turn, though I’ll elaborate about this in the romance section. Just like in MS1, the story takes place at a fast pace, with continuation from where we left off with the drug dealing cult, added with Kurosawa’s very own back story. We are introduced to two characters, his uncle and cousin, that elaborates bits of his character that the MC has not yet seen of him. The conclusion to the crime aspects of the story did ended on an abrupt note, having an open ending instead but it could just be that the writers wanted to expand on the story building for his future episodes. Compared to MS1, it was less repetitive as we have MC working in a disguise to solve this case so the information we as readers get are more on hand, which is much more fun than just reading of her simply observing people. Again, I’m not saying MS1 was bad due to that reason as I do understand it helps the story flow. Though, since I’m more of an action oriented person, MS2 was more up to my alley than the previous part. The side characters like the little girl Sayumi or the other hospital staff Kodamura(?) were great, but not as impactful as in MS1, which was a little pity. I do like how involved the rest of the instructors/chief are this time round, even hinting that Ishigami, the MC’s direct instructor, have been keeping a close eye on her. I’m glad.

Romance: 5/5

I’m a weird empath so I do feel things more strongly than others, but I tend to cut my emotions off really quickly. I can’t tell you the amount of times I’ve sobbed at certain scenes with Kurosawa acting all friendly to the MC but in actuality pushing her away. I feel like I do relate to Kurosawa more than his MC to be quite honest, but I think that was why this was great on the romance aspects. Even though Kurosawa and me are more similar, I could feel and emphasise and experience how the MC felt with her inner thoughts, actions and words. If I were to be put in that situation, I’ll probably act like her, which is weird, since I just mentioned I’m more like Kurosawa than her. I think this fact was a nice tidbit, having made me feel to how lonesome Kurosawa could actually be when the MC was angry with him. I sob a lot during the other HLITF stories too and Kurosawa is no exception. I know this is a more mature story, but it’s really funny to me how out of all the routes, Kurosawa’s was the one I felt with most sexual tension between him and his MC; considering that he’s probably the most boy next door trope compared to the other characters. Of course, we also know he has a hidden darker side, which makes it all the more sexy I think.

MC: 5/5

Like I mentioned before, I absolutely adored the MC in this MS2. She didn’t allowed herself to be a doormat, steeling herself to walk away from something that wasn’t ideal in her heart even if she was head over heels in love. I think she had every right to be angry over what he had done to her and I liked that the writers addressed her trust issues with him after he left her cold after their one night stand together. I also liked how she conveyed her thoughts clearly and maturely when she got into a proper relationship with him, and even went out of her way to tell him so during their Epilogue. Communication is always important in a relationship, and even more so with a guy like Kurosawa. A scene that comes to mind was when Kurosawa placed his head on her shoulders on the train after a night out together, and she quickly let him know that she was uncomfortable with how half baked he had been acting towards her and also declined his advances. I didn’t expect for her to slap him afterwards though as I’m never a fan of physical altercations but the writing did build up to show how frustrated she had been getting with him. I also liked the little blur bits of the sprites/background they showed when the two were in the reference room, signifying that she couldn’t take his antics any longer as she found herself crying. It was a nice little detail (that made me sob too). Other than the romance aspects, the MC showcased her grit again in this MS2 with how long she tailed after a potential suspect while the other trainees moved ahead of her. She’s quick to apologise as well for getting too carried away with her judgment, which makes for an excellent Public Safety Officer. Compared to MS1, she definitely grew up a lot, and I think her being angry at Kurosawa and distant from him did helped her to shape up better as well. It’s very human of her to form irrational thoughts but also learn from it and apply her past experiences to them. It was an enjoyable read thanks to the MC’s development from MS1 and I look forward to future Kurosawa episodes from now on.

#kurosawa toru #toru kurosawa #her love in the force #hlitf #hlitf kurosawa #voltage inc #love 365 #review

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fandomlurker · 4 years ago

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A Ponderous Rewatch: “Win Big”

And so we begin. For real, this time.

And to start, we have to go all the way back to Animaniacs season 1, episode 2, with the very first Pinky and the Brain skit which is named “Win Big”.

Interestingly enough, the duo are not directly trying to take over the world in this episode. The premise is that Brain needs money to buy the one part needed for his actual plan to take over the world using a machine he calls the “Super-Conductive Magnetic Infindibulator”, which will “deplete hydrogen and promote gravitational collapse [to produce] a magnetic charge from the center of the Earth so strong that every person who has loose change in their pockets will be magnetically drawn to the ground and stuck there”.

…

For those of you who are new to the series and for those of you who maybe can’t remember the show very well, I want to say that yes, what you’re probably asking yourself right now is true: Brain’s plans are almost always this complex and completely absurd with giant, glaring holes in logistics. There’s been a long-time “theory” that while their theme song says “one is a genius, the other’s insane” and intends to indicate that Brain is the genius while Pinky’s insane, it’s actually the other way around. And honestly? That doesn’t exactly hold up to any kind of scrutiny at all. Brain is actually a genius…he’s just also very, very short-sighted and lacks a lot of common sense. He’s so focused on his goal of world domination that he forgets to account for even the most obvious of details that would completely ruin what he’s trying to accomplish. And Pinky? Well, Pinky’s a lot smarter than he seems, but I wouldn’t exactly mark him as a genius. He’s just more worldly, more emotionally intelligent, and has a knack for pointing out the obvious. For you D&D nerds out there, think of it like this: Brain is a high INT low WIS character while Pinky is a high WIS low INT character.

As for which one is “insane”? Disregarding the…let’s just say “problematic” baggage that comes with that word, I’d argue that Pinky is just neurodivergent and Brain has a lot of problems. Like, a lot of problems. We’ll get more into that mess much farther down the line.

In any case, the opening of this episode has Brain pulling Pinky away from watching what is obviously supposed to be The Honeymooners, complete with “Bang, zoom, right in the kisser!” quote and everything. That quote, or one like it, was what the character Ralph Kramden would frustratedly yell at his wife, Alice, after she’d dismiss a get rich quick scheme of his. It was an ultimately impotent threat of violence, as he never did hit her. A lot of folks before me have delved into how messed up and controversial that whole running gag was, so I didn’t particularly feel the need to go over it here.

However, it does become immediately relevant because as Pinky laughs at the joke and excitedly quotes it while Brain is trying to get his attention, Brain reaches up and gently holds both their faces close for a few moments…

“Stop saying that, Pinky!...”

…then more aggressively tugs Pinky’s face down as he finishes with “…Or I shall have to hurt you.”

“Oh, okay. Sorry, Brain. NARF!”

Isn’t it interesting how the very first thing this series does is juxtapose Pinky and the Brain’s relationship with that of the main married couple on The Honeymooners? Like, it’s certainly not the most healthy of a relationship parallel to make, but in Pinky and Brain’s favour their world is governed by slapstick humour and thus any and all violence is much less serious. Also, there’s Pinky’s…uh…special relationship with physical pain that will become more apparent as the series goes on. Like, of course this kind of behaviour is wrong and appalling in real life, but this is a Warner Brothers Looney Toons-style cartoon and there’s a big difference between the two.

There’s also this little tidbit of information on the Animaniacs wiki regarding this episode and its writer, Peter Hastings:

“Although Peter Hastings has stated that he always tried to have Brain threaten to hurt Pinky but never actually hit him (because he felt this was both funnier and truer to the character), Tom Ruegger and the other producers would often have Brain actually hit Pinky. Even in this very first short, the Brain does follow through.”

Moving on, though, after Brain Rube Goldberg machine’s his way out of their cage and points out that Pinky has an “inordinately short attention span” after Pinky gets briefly distracted by another TV show that’s a very blatant parody of Jeopardy, he explains to Pinky his latest plan for world domination.

“EGAD, Brain, brilliant!”

“…Uh oh, no, wait…what if they take off their pants?”

^ The face of a man who somehow managed to forget that clothes are removable.

See what I mean about Pinky having a knack for pointing out the obvious? It’s very much needed to counteract Brain’s complete lack of foresight and introspection.

“Then…we’ll have to take over the world quickly.”

…Though there’s also something to be said for Brain’s stubbornness.

So they need a part for Brain’s machine called a Infindibulator, which is for some reason listed in the Farmer’s Almanac??? Which to my knowledge doesn’t sell anything at all??? Okay, Brain, whatever you say.

Brain actually kicks Pinky directly in the ass to get him up onto the Almanac to read it,

which would be alarming if not for Pinky’s completely happy and sincere “Thanks! :D” afterwards. It’s a mere hint to Pinky’s…predilections. I find it interesting that it’s so subtly foreshadowed in this very first short. I know you newer folks might think I’m joking, but I assure you I’m not. You will see.

As a side note, it’s so odd hearing Rob Paulsen’s early Pinky voice in these first several Animaniacs shorts. I’ve seen fans say that it’s more lispy than the standard Pinky voice that we’re all familiar with, but to me it just sounds like Pinky with a very, very bad cold and a stuffy nose. Get this mouse some nasal spray.

So Pinky finds the entry for the Infindibulator and it costs a whopping $99000. Where would two little lab mice find that kind of cash?

It sure is lucky and convenient that the TV is still on during that moment and tuned into an episode of Jeopardy—I mean “Gyp-Parody” (Really, writers? Really? In addition to being a horrible and lazy pun, I would rather not have to type a slur so much, so I’m just going to call it the name of the show it’s based on) where the reward for winning totals $99000.

And here we go, the first of its kind. The birth of the most famous running joke from Pinky and the Brain!

“Pinky… Are you pondering what I’m pondering?”

“I think so, Brain, but where are we going to get a duck and a hose at this hour?”

…Believe it or not, Pinky’s bizarre answers do have an explanation and a certain logic to them, but we find out the hows and whys much, much farther along in the series. That said, I’ll be damned if I know how he got to this particular train of thought right now. The inner machinations of Pinky’s mind are an enigma.

So Brain gets the idea to become a contestant on Jeopardy to win the amount of money they need for their plan. Pinky points out that the questions on the game show are very, very hard and Brain would have to get all of them right, and I just love Brain slowly turning his head to face Pinky with the most deadpan “Bitch, are you for real?” look on his face.

To Brain’s credit, he doesn’t berate the other mouse at all for his doubts. He just very calmly asks Pinky to quiz him about anything he can think of. When Pinky asks him “What is pie?”, well, see above for the summary of the answer Brain gives.

He then asks for a harder question, and Pinky asks him which TV character says “Bang! Zoom!—“ before Brain cuts him off with a wack of a pencil for quoting something inane and annoying him again.

Though he quivers a little before the smack, Pinky’s fine afterwards. Smiling, even.

And he happily gives Brain the answer anyway, complete with bows. “Ralph Kramden! TA-DAH! :D”

But Brain is insistent on preparing to go on Jeopardy, grabbing Pinky by the tail to drag him off-screen and Pinky is…

Hmm.

He’s, uhh, more than fine with it.

Now we get the debut of the human suit mecha. It’s quite the staple of the series; the go-to for a human disguise whenever the mice need one.

And it certainly is…something. You may be noticing the lack of a human head. Don’t worry about it. Brain certainly didn’t.

I love Brain’s playful little “Honey, I’m hoooome!~” when he pops his head out, despite having a deadpan look on his face the entire time. He’s having fun!

“Ahahaha! Oh, that’s a funny joke, Brain!”

“I am not devoid of humour.”

Pinky is having a little less fun with his tail accidentally tied along with the shoelaces, however.

It’s fine, he’s fine. He’ll be okay! Pinky is indestructible.

He’s a pocket pal now. He’s fine.

Makin’ my way downtown, walkin’ fast…~

Okay, sorry, he’s hailing a cab instead. Effectively, too!

Oh hi, Warners, nice to see you! Doing a literal running gag, I see. Nice, nice.

Goodbye!

So if you were wondering how regular humans would react to Brain’s “clever” and totally made without proper foresight disguise, well…

“Wh—HOA! Hey, if you don’t mind me askin’, bub, what happened to your head?”

“Nothing. I am a mouse in a large, mechanical suit.”

“Hehehehe! Okay, all right, my fault for askin’, right? Heh.”

Yup. This isn’t the first time this kind of thing happens. I guess since they’re in Hollywood the taxi driver’s seen worse.

So Brain gets on the show (don’t worry about how, shh) and the announcer calls him “Brian” instead and Brain politely tries to correct him. I can’t exactly fault the announcer because 1. “Brain” isn’t a name and 2. Look at Brain’s gloriously messed up handwriting.

The host walks on in. It’s pretty cute that they gave him the parody name “Alex Quebec”. It’s a suitable pun and rhyme to hint at the fact that Alex Trebek was born in Canada. Rest in peace, Mr. Trebek.

The first question is in the category of celebrity shoe sizes and asks what size sandals Plato wore. Umm. Okaaaaay… Thank goodness this show first aired before websites for foot fetishists cataloguing celebrity feet was a thing. Also is it just me, or does that font looks like something off of The Simpsons?

I don’t know if I should be worried or not that Brain got the correct answer to this question. (Seven and a half, if you’re curious.)

Question two is totally a trick question, though. There’s no such place as “Lestho”. “Lesotho”, however, is a real kingdom in South Africa. King Moshoeshoe I was indeed the ruler in 1820 as Brain answers, although the place was called “Basutoland” at the time and didn’t formally become a kingdom until 1822.

Educational!

Question three is a normal if extremely hard question for anyone unfamiliar with geographic locations off of the southeast of Asia. There are a lot of correct answers, and Brain answers correctly with “Bikar, Ailuk, and Ailinglaplap”. As this post notes, he is totally flexing on everyone by naming very obscure coral atoll islands that are some of the furthest neighbours from the Isle of Yap.

You smug asshole, Brain.

We don’t get the questions Brain answers correctly in the following montage, but we do get a close-up of his handwriting. Look at this. Just…look at it.

We get to see the aftermath of Brain’s monopolizing of the scores, though. The other contestants aren’t looking too good. Note that it seems there were times that they did manage to buzz in to answer before Brain did, but they must have got all of their answers or at least most of them wrong. They’re both in the negatives.

“Any plans on how you’ll spend your winnings?”

“Yes. I plan to take over the world!”

“...”

“…Ah haha, my fault for asking.”

Pinky claps and congratulates Brain on doing so well so far, because he’s a sweetheart like that, and

Brain flicks him back into the pocket. Man, you’re so quietly mean in this first episode, Brain.

Now it’s the final question, from the category “Quotable Quotes”. I remember this kind of category as usually being the easiest on Jeopardy, so it’s kind of surprising that it’s the Final Jeopardy question.

Uh-oh.

Looks like someone forgot that Jeopardy questions aren’t all science, history, and geography-related. Sometimes they’re about pop-culture.

Brain is…not very good with pop-culture. And Pinky’s been banished to the bottom of the coat pocket.

Whoops.

“Umm. Uh, who is, uhh… I, umm. Who is, uhh… Who is…uhh, Pinky…?”

Oh Brain, honey, it’s cute that you got so stumped and flustered that you just blurted out the only name that came to mind (and because Pinky was quoting it earlier, but still!), but it’s also so very, very sad.

Of course that’s incorrect, and Brain is just so monumentally defeated.

“And how much did you wager?”

“Everything…”

HUBRIS!

We then cut to the mice watching Brain’s horrible defeat on TV, and Pinky suggests a few other game shows they could try: Wheel of Misfortune, $10,000 Pile-A-Mud… The latter of which is supposed to be a parody of the old game show Pyramid, which wasn’t around in that format by the time this episode aired, so…good luck with that one, Pinky.

But no, Brain doesn’t plan on going on any more game shows. He instead walks sadly over to their cage to rest for tomorrow night.

It’s then that we are witness to the birth of the other memetic exchange this show is known for:

“Why, Brain? What are we going to do tomorrow night?”

“The same thing we do every night, Pinky: Try to take over the world!”

That wink, though. It’s the confident wink that sells this and tells us all you need to know about the Brain. No matter how bad his defeat, how humiliated he gets, or how sad he feels about failing, Brain always gets back to business sooner or later. He has determination on his side. And Pinky, of course.

And that was the very first Pinky and the Brain short! A pretty good start for the series, really. Nothing spectacular, and definitely not the worst, just a good start that sets the tone of the series well and establishes several of the running gags the show is known for. The creators pretty much have Brain as a character down right away: serious but not devoid of humour, single-minded, stubborn, egotistical, smart, and determined to meet his goals. There are a few things missing from him that we get later, and he certainly softens a bit by the time the spin-off starts, but they’ve set up a solid foundation to build on so far here. Pinky’s character is a little more nebulous in this episode, though. He’s shown to be generally good-natured, smarter than he first seems, easily distracted but well-meaning, and willing and able to help Brain achieve his goals. Still, he’s missing the much of the overwhelming kindness and his enthusiasm for Brain’s plans and awe at Brain’s intellect that he has as we go further through the series. I mean, there are hints of it here, too, but it’s much more understated compared to later on. Not to mention that Pinky gains a bit of a sassy side to him that somehow still manages to be friendly, like when you gently tease your friends while still caring about them.

I understand that you can’t really squeeze all of that into the first, like, fifteen minutes or so of a series, though.

Also, the animation for this episode wasn’t exactly the best of the series. There are points where Brain looks kinda muppet-y and Pinky is uncharacteristically gaunt and gangly. I mean, Pinky is usually a little gangly but not as hunched over and his nose stretched out so much. It’s not the worst, either, and serves as a decent baseline of how the characters look. Wang Film Production looks to be the animation studio behind this one, and I’d say their style is the most “normal” quality of the ones that get to animate for PatB. They do settle into a better and more consistent style for the show, so I’ll try and be on the look-out for that.

I’m not sure if the other posts I’m going to do on this rewatch will be quite so play-by-play as this one was. Since this is the first, I felt the need to establish in more detail the kind of things that happen in your average episode of PatB and the general rhythm of the show. I’m definitely going to try and include every instance of the ongoing running gags the series has, though.

I feel I should also say that from now on I might have to double or triple the amount of episodes in one post, too. There are some episodes in a long-running series like this where not too much of note happens, I’m sure, and I know at least a few are either silent shorts, cameos in other Animaniacs skits or little music videos and you can only get so much out of those entries.

Yes, music videos. Including a cameo appearance in a Macarena parody. I’ll prepare as best as I can to cringe so hard from secondhand embarrassment that I morph into a pretzel shape.

We’re only getting started, folks. Things are only going to get weirder and more interesting from here on out.

#Pinky and the Brain #PatB #Win Big

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