#it is a sweet bread type thing!

[sparks-chaotic-cove]

When I was little my grandma would sneak zucchini into my pumpkin bread because I was a picky eater-

to this day I never trust her with my beloved pumpkin muffins :[

[icewindandboringhorror]

What would you choose? :0c

(note: original image is from HERE (link) - but I edited it to add a wider variety of options.. also added $3 extra to the total, even though I know that makes it more uneven lol, I thought if you're adding 10 whole extra items, the money to spend should at least be increased slightly, if that makes sense..)

[robinsnest2111]

in my mind my mutuals and I are standing in a beautiful cozy kitchen, all of us baking delicious treats, cakes and pies and cookies and breads and biscuits and whatever else

we're having so much fun and each of us gets their favourite flavours and it's so nice... <3

[stinkrascal]

pros of trying a new restaurant: the lady working the front counter said i was really pretty :)

cons of trying a new restaurant: i got food poisoning from it

[lifeinkinder]

Actual text I sent my sister today: Bread is the best invention ever

Can you guess what I've been craving for days and finally gave in and got today?

[7squidgy7]

✧.*Merry Christmas/ Happy Holidays*.✧

✧.*-----------------------------------------------------------------------*.✧

I was thinking about how Christmas would work in the Cotl universe. So what I've got so far is a celebration for winter solstice, it's a day to bring light in the darkest time, things like decorating, feasting and gift giving, pretty standard Christmas traditions.

However one of the traditions I've come up with is the yuletide fairy (basically this universes Father Christmas).

Originally the night before the winter solstice one of the lambs followers would leave sweets and treats for the cults children outside their tents. But this follower eventually died and asked the lamb continue the tradition and wear their skull while doing it, so they in a way can continue the tradition.

As a result the character of the yuletide fairy was born, the story being that the spirit of this follower returns for 1 night a year to bring joy.

in reality each year the lamb dresses up for this wearing the skull, a crown of green and ties bells to their cape that let people know their outside. Gifts include sweet breads, candied fruits, nuts and sweets.

✧.*-----------------------------------------------------------------------*.✧

Time-lapse below, warning it's flashy:

Bonus:

Looking at pics of candied oranges made me super crave them so I made my own. They're a bit more tangy than I like, I was hoping for more crystalline type Stuff, but it's alright

[tbaluver]

Hey! I’m the anon who request the idol!reader, I really liked it and I wanted to request hcs for a reader who does streaming?

When You're A Streamer- The Love And DeepSpace Men

parings in order: Xavier x Reader, Zayne x Reader, Rafayel x Reader, Sylus x Reader genre: fluff fluff a/n: hihi again anonnie ! sorry this took a while to post this was sitting in my drafts until some ideas sparked up .·°՞(¯□¯)՞°·. this was such a cute and fun concept to write i hope this was okay and you enjoy ! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ♡ any likes and reblogs are always appreciated! enjoy!

⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆

Xavier:

Your audience would already be familiar with Xavier. He would occasionally pop up in the background of your stream with snacks and water when you've been streaming for too long. He'll softly smile and wave at the webcam, give you a sweet kiss on the top of your head, and then quietly slip out of the room. Sometimes he'll be sleeping in the background of your stream.

Sometimes he'll fall asleep with your stream in the background which resulted to him having a ton of channel points.

You tried to do a cooking/ baking stream with him one time and it ended up in a disaster. Flour and other ingredients everywhere but the bowl. Your audience thought it was hilarious and wanted more content of you two doing that more often.

He would get jealous when he would see a lot of people simping in your chat but it would be okay because you'd ban them. Anything to keep your lovers mind at peace!

He loves it when you include him in your streams to play games or do other challenges. He does not get scared playing any horror games but if you do, he'll reassure you that he's right here to protect you. Your chat would be a mix of awe and jealously at you two in stream. He's also your good luck charm whenever you stream a gacha game.

Zayne:

You two would have the worst sleep schedules ever. He would come home late at night and you would still be streaming when he came home. Eventually he'll tell you to stop streaming for the day so you guys can rest together.

He loves it when you do a baking stream. He'll get to try all the sweet treats you try to make behind the camera.

His face never makes an appearance because he doesn't want to be in the spotlight but his lower half would be seen. Your chat would be down bad for his hands and you can't help but agree.

The type of partner that would make you yummy home made food and bring it to you while you're streaming.

He finds it endearing that you're helping out the hospital when you do charity streams or any charity streams in general. He'll bring you a ton of snacks and water to make sure you're energized because he knows those can be lengthy.

When he's comfortable, he'll join you for some games on stream, but the chat would only hear his voice as his face will stay off camera. You guys would play games like Overcooked or It Takes Two or Bread and Fred. Your chat would absolutely love his dry humor and would want you two to play or interact more during stream often.

Rafayel:

He would have a streaming set up for you somewhere in his studio so you're still near him. Your streaming room would be so cute. You two would have designed it together and your fans would end up wanting a room tour.

He would have your stream open on his phone or any device and he'll play it in the background so he can listen to your voice as he paints.

Rafayel loves to be included in general in your streamer career. He'll help you design any of your custom merch or help manage your social media posts, thumbnails, and anything that was creative.

You would do a variety of things on stream depending on what you planned out for that day. Sometimes he'll help you plan and give you ideas! You could play different games, reaction, and challenges. He would love it when you included him in stream and sometimes you guys would get to do couple challenges.

If you were to include him in stream to be your 'good luck charm' when you played a gacha game, he would be so cocky. If you ended up losing your 50/50, he would look at you as if it was YOUR fault.

Sometimes he'll appear in your stream by 'mistake' and your chat would be freaking out. He would bask in all the compliments about him in your chat and you would have to usher him to leave.

There would be a ton of fan edits of you two online. Your fans would eat up any of the content that you guys post together, things like outfit of the day posts with him or you posting his artwork. They just think you guys are so cute. He would also lowkey be judgmental of your fans fanart of you two.

Sylus:

When he found out you were a streamer, he would upgrade your streaming set up with the best materials.

Your chat definitely knew you had a partner. You'd say hi to him in chat and they would hear him in the background as you talk to him. Your chat would be so down bad for his voice and would want him to do a reveal.

He secretly wants to be part of your stream sometimes because they seem like fun, but unfortunately he has to keep his identity hidden. That doesn't stop him from supporting you though.

He's genuinely interested in your job and understands how important it is to you. He's also really impressed by how much you gain followers and in awe with how much your fans love you.

He would be your number 1 fan and your number 1 viewer on all your streaming platforms. He would gift you so much anytime you stream. He would also have so much channel points and would make you do the silliest things. He'll make you sing or dance and sometimes he'll end the stream so he can have you all to himself.

He'll text you to ask if you want this or that to eat or drink and he'll slide it to you off camera so you're well-fed and hydrated.

Will be your rock when you face an criticism or any rough patches in your streaming career. He'll provide a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on while offering supportive words to help you maintain confidence in your career.

[gh0stsp1d3r]

LOVE the way you write nerd!rafe 🥹 could we see their first date like after the “giving nerd!rafe head for the first time” fic you did ?!

first date

A/N: IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE.

Warnings: all fluff!

NERD!RAFE MASTERLIST

Honestly, when you agreed to go out on a date right after having sex with him, you didn’t know what you expected. But whatever it is, it definitely wasn’t this. You didn’t expect it to be so… perfect.

A beach date wasn’t exactly a typical first date. But, it sounded extremely fun. It was different and unique, something about it had your stomach fluttering. Why were you so nervous? You’re his tuttee, you’ve literally talked to him countless times.

You put your earrings in, smoothing down your sundress as you stood up. You had your bikini on under it, just incase you did want to go in the water.

Your phone vibrated on your bed, with a little text from Rafe.

rafe (super cute tutor guy)

Hey, I’m here.

You typed a quick message back,

“be down in a sec!”

He replied with, “Take your time.” A small smile made its way onto your face, hearting the message and putting your phone in your little crotchet bag. You just pulled on some simple slides, not bothering with it.

You went down your stairs, taking a breath before opening the door up. You saw Rafes car sitting there, him messing with the ring on his finger in the drivers seat. He looked up to see you, giving you a soft smile as you hopped into the passengers seat.

“Hi.” He spoke, you turning to look at him back with a smile.

“Hi.” You spoke rather shyly, swallowing the lump that began to form in your throat. You were usually so confident, so why were you so nervous?

“You look… really beautiful.”

“Thank you. You do too.” You replied, before realizing how weird it sounded. “I meant.. you look handsome. Not beautiful-“

He laughed, “Thank you.”

His eyes lingered on you for a moment, before turning his car on, and beginning the drive to the beach.

“So, uhm, what made you pick the beach?” You asked him when he started to drive, him shrugging his shoulders, pursing his lips together.

“Well, it’s nice out. And I didn’t like- I feel like you deserved better than some boring dinner date.” He began to stammer out, you smiling at his words. “I didn’t even know if it was good, but-“

“No, no, it is. I like it. That’s…very sweet of you.” You hummed, him glancing at you with his lips turned up.

“I’m glad you like it.” He said, letting out a quiet sigh of relief.

You gave him a smile, him glancing back at you while he turned up the radio, rolling down the window as you approached downtown, and drove closer to the beach.

“Alright,” he spoke when he parked the car in a spot, “I just gotta get the stuff from the back.” He told you, opening up his car door, you doing the same.

You stood, watching as he opened up the truck bed, grabbing the towels, along with a large bag.

“You got it?” You asked him with a giggle when you saw him struggle to balance everything in his arms and close the trunk bed, him laughing at his own struggles.

“Maybe not.” He replied sheepishly, you going to his side and helping him close the trunk bed.

“Thanks.” He told you with a small smile, still carrying everything in his arms.

“Mhm.” You hummed, beginning to walk in front of him, and making your way to the beach, him following behind you.

As soon as you found a spot, you grabbing a towel from his hands, putting it down onto the sand. He had a small smile when he put down the bags and sat down next to you, offering you a water bottle.

“Thank you.” You smiled at him, not thinking when you leaned in to press your lips to his cheek. His cheeks turned crimson, mouth going slightly agape.

“Y-yeah.” was the only thing he could reply with, sitting down next to you, breaking off a piece of bread.

“It’s really nice out today.” He commented in his best attempt to make small talk, you nodding and laughing in agreement.

“It is.” You replied, glancing at him with a smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

The both of you talked, ate and laughed for what felt like hours, but was really only 40 minutes. You enjoyed talking to him, more than you thought you would.

“Uhm… do you wanna take a walk, maybe?” He suggested when you both began to pack everything up into the bag, you smiling and nodding.

He carried the beach bag on his shoulder, your towels, shoes and the food containers thrown in there. He held his hand out, looking at you with his head tilted to the side like a puppy would. You grabbed his hand, the both of you walking alongside the water. A large smile was visible on your face as you looked out at the horizon and the setting sun. He smiled as well, the both of you feeling the wave crash against your feet.

“It’s beautiful.” You breathed out, him looking at you, lips slightly parted. He nodded in agreement, “It is.”

You turned to meet his eyes, both of your gazes locking. His breath hitched when you moved your hand to cradle his face, getting on the tips of your toes so that you could reach his lips. His eyes shut, both your lips meeting halfway.

His hands went to your waist, pulling you flush against him as his lips moved with yours and the sun set behind the both of you.

Taglist:

@moonssyrup @koibleufish @anamiad00msday @wearemadeofstardust0 @wintertxt @teenwolfbitches28 @10ava01 @mileyraes @theoraekenslover

[cute-sucker]

EX HUSBAND RAFE HEADCANONS !!

note: here is an extension of some of this: ex-husband rafe when you start dating again..

˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.˚❀༉‧₊˚.

ex-husband!rafe will continuously come to your house telling you it's only to check up on your baby girl

ex-husband!rafe will catch himself calling you sweetheart and honey, and them stop himself before it gets out of hand, iching his head and tilting his head in that endearing way

ex-husband!rafe is in tune with your cycle, and you swear the man knows the exact day to send you chocolate and sweet things to handle your sweet tooth

ex-husband!rafe will sleep on the couch with a sheepish smile, but then will soon later join you in your bed, cradling you in the way that made your breath catch whispering "what's the master bed for then, huh?"

ex-husband!rafe will know everything about your dating life/borderline which may seen creepy but somehow you know it's for your health and somehow you understand it all

ex-husband!rafe will let the goddamn pretentious expensive preschool know that his daughter is worth the world and the last thing they want to do is piss the cameron's off

ex-husband!rafe would find himself desperately cracking an inside in an attempt to reminisce about times before your split

ex-husband!rafe will still introduce you as his wife in business outings, a sharp smile on his face while his hand wanders possessively low at the small part of your back, and sometimes you liked how he took stake of what was his

ex-husband!rafe would always attend school events for their daughter, cheering their daughter at the soccer match, and making decisions over coffee

ex-husband!rafe would have you a new bouquet every single time he comes to your house- almost as if to make up for every single one he didn't give you when the two of you were together

ex-husband!rafe still glances at you in that way where dull sparks travel up into your heart, and you feel the testament of time and the feeling that you would never forget the imprint he has on your mind

ex-husband!rafe always compliments you, and sometimes he kisses your forehead, and when you're crying too hard he bundles you in his arms and tells you everything

ex-husband!rafe watches cheesy romance movies with you, both of your legs entwined, and he watches you during those rom coms all teary eyed and telling him it was the best time for romance

ex-husband!rafe lets you know everything that happens in his life, if it's for a little chat or a ride in his car- and his car? he still drives you everywhere. who knows the types of sickos there are in the world? that's what he says to say as he rants furiously

ex-husband!rafe is still the first emergency contact in your phone, and when you get in trouble - he's running to you, arms open to cradle you in his warmth. he always knows how to handle the situation

ex-husband!rafe starts baking for you, and sometimes he leaves a few cupcakes or muffins every single he comes. at this point you feel the sudden urge to grab his face and kiss him every single time he cheekily leaves more loafs of bread for you

ex-husband!rafe loves your daughter and you to the moon and back, and he calls the two of you, "his girls," and you swear sometimes you feel your heart break when you see the wary look on his face

ex-husband!rafe always avoids the question regarding why you split up, because he sees the way hot tears well up in your eyes, and the way your hands shake underneath the table and the last time a bastard asked that question--rafe almost punched him in the face

ex-husband!rafe curses himself every single day for signing those papers and letting the best goddamn thing he ever had go.

[astro-rainbow777]

💐🌸 𝓣𝓪𝓾𝓻𝓾𝓼 𝓣𝓱𝓻𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱 𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓗𝓸𝓾𝓼𝓮𝓼 🧸🌱

♉︎ - Happy Taurus Season Everyone!!! In honor of Taurus season, I am continuing the signs through the houses series. I hope y’all enjoy my findings & this post serves you well. Thanks so much for all of the support! Happy Spring & Upcoming Beltane to the Pagan Community <3

🌸 Taurus in the First House ~ Taurus on the ascendant is the embodiment of peace, calm and pleasure. These natives aren’t the most outgoing but leave such a comfortable and cozy first impression. They don’t say more than needs to be said, however they are unlikely to turn down a conversation. They have a soft and natural beauty about them and strong familial values. They enjoy the finer things, have a clean aesthetic and a “rich” aura. Many of them are shorter or more petitie in size, have a pleasing and smooth voice and kind eyes. However, if you mess with the bull, you’ll get the horns! Being on the opposing end of Scorpio, when they cut you off, it is completely. Good luck getting back into their lives because they are a closed book. Why y’all always smell good? Fr tho

🐂 Taurus in the Second House ~ Here the sign is in its ruling house, they do very well in saving their money, are picky about what they eat and indulge in the material pleasures of life. They value loyalty, commitment, stability and security - not to mention their love fashion & the arts. They will tell you they have the most exquisite taste, you would find it very difficult to change their mind. They hold up strong values and morales, what they know to be right and wrong is the truth. This is a very secure personality, they are very comfortable with their bodies, and have a healthy sense of worth and self love. Honestly such a healthy placement - as someone with NO earth in their chart - muhbenaaaace

💰 Taurus in the Third House ~ These natives find security and peace in their childhood homes, where they grew up, the memories of their cousins and siblings. They could be the most stable or the least stable out of their siblings. The way they think, learn and communicate is slow and methodical. They take their time in studying new topics, preferring to stay on the surface of a topic. They may have an artistic and beautiful singing voice, or maybe the way they speak is just very polite and sweet. They were raised with manners and this makes them very charming. They can have a liking for music that moves at a slower pace, classical music, or just a more elegant taste in art.

🥘 Taurus in the Fourth House ~ Their family could be a source of stability and security for them. The mom, mother figure or more feminine role model can be the bread winner in the family, her love language could be gifts, an amazing cook, and give a lot of hugs 🫂 They have stable emotions, it takes a lot to emotionally sway them. It may end up bothering people who try to get an emotional reaction from them because of this. They can be the most grounded one in their family. Their family may view them as realistic, practical and reliable. Family is what gives them sanction from the world.

💝 Taurus in the Fifth House ~ They express them selves in a very material type of way, their flex is their finances. These natives take a lot of pride in what they have...this usually comes from a place of having to work really hard for their things. They love the natural look, minimalist, they like long lasting, high quality, practical fashion. To them that is the best statement to make. They don’t like that trash to treasure look their tastes are refined. They will shower their kids with the finer things and really enjoy providing for them - this will be their love language. They aren’t huge adrenaline junkies and enjoy more grounded, chill hobbies. They definitely don’t mind being alone and love their down time at home…on the couch…snacks…naps…repeat.

🐻 Taurus in the 6th ~ These natives prefer a slow start to their daily routine, and enjoy a slow paced job, with chill yet organized coworkers. The workplace must be something that they don’t hate… because if they hate it and it stresses them out just thinking of going, they won’t work there. Period. They need low maintenance pets as these individuals are very independent in nature. It’s important for their day job to be a place of peace and pleasure for them, and once they are comfortable, it’s gonna be hard to get them to leave. Their job can provide them with sooooo much stability if they have a good one.

🍨 Taurus in the 7th ~ Wining and Dining with your loved ones! Shopping sprees, luxurious and high quality partners. With the ones they love the most, they spoil, eat and they just want to be lazy with them honestly. They want their relationships to be a place of peace for them. It’s important that their partner can support themselves and is stable on their own. It will just cause them stress if they are constantly worrying about having to take care or mommy their partner. It’s possible that they can stay with someone out of fear of the unknown/change, even tho they don’t like them or it’s not working anymore.

🌷 Taurus in the Eighth House ~ Cycles related to self esteem, self worth, and supporting themselves. Honestly, this is a really hard placement to have- they may have times where they stay in ab*sive relationships because they can’t support themselves financially or they are too uncomfortable alone. However, the eighth house is notorious for taking your greatest fear/weakness and turning it into their super power. You just have to get through those lessons and take those leaps of faith to unlock that power and hidden potential! They like to engage in their senses when they’re intimate with their partners and prefer slow love making rather than the raw primal stuff.

🪴 Taurus in the Ninth House ~ These people can be a little fixed in their beliefs, their spiritual beliefs/religion can be a source stability and sanction for them. If they aren’t necessarily spiritual- they could just have a specific philosophy or lifestyle that they stick to. What I admire about these individuals, is they know exactly what they want. When they travel, it has to be somewhere where they know exactly what to expect, somewhere that won’t give them anxiety, and probably a more luxurious staycation type of experience. They could also enjoy a nice nature walk with their loved ones.

👛 Taurus in the Tenth House ~ Every single person I have met with this placement neeeeeed a stable job, they will not leave a job if it provides them with the type of lifestyle they desire. It doesn’t really matter what they are doing for their career as long as it aligns with their values. Their dad/father figure could have been the sole provider and could have made a huge impact on their reputation. This is definitely a daddies money placement 💀 - sorry if that’s triggering for anyone lol. The father figure could be super down to earth and chill, enjoy cooking or just be way too overly indulgent in a negative manifestation.

👒 Taurus in the Eleventh House ~ Is the stay at home friend, doesn’t like to get out of their comfort zone to meet new people. Much likely to want to stay inside and bond with their community in a space that is familiar and inviting to them. Their community could be their sanction and be the most stable part of their lives. They enjoy cooking and creating art for their friends. Anything to bring peace to their homies senses! For their friends, the Taurus eleventh house native’s place is a home away from home. How special 🥹

👄 Taurus in the Twelfth House ~ When it comes to matters of the twelfth house, spirituality, isolation, ect. - these individuals may like to keep things light and on the surface. They are comfortable being alone, in fact they consider it to be comfortable and safe. Their spirituality isn’t something they spend time questioning, and they could be very comfortable with the unknown, they enjoy their own curious nature. They are endearing to their own selves, however sometimes their sense of worth could be confusing. They may have a hard time understanding their own values and morals, preferring to just go with the flow, everyday they are a new person trying on different personalities, hobbies and styles! The possibilities are endless! It’s quite an interesting placement. One more thing….secret indulgences…the silent snacker

Smell ya later!

[whyoneartheven]

hmmm… I don’t have any weird eating habits, per say… I used to though! I went through a phase where I put pepperoni on everything. I didn’t even like it that much though; it was just through sheer force of will bc I’d persuaded my mom to buy a bunch and no one else was eating it lol

The only food I really don’t like is sweet potatoes… I also typically can’t eat a lot of sugar and bread at all but that is for health reasons so I’m not sure it counts? Also. meatloaf never sits well with me…

I definitely am not as brave as Margin though because I could NOT bring myself to eat a live bug. The crickets or the mealworm, maybe? But once my brother ate a fly that landed on his salad just to freak me out and I still get queasy thinking about it XD

Ummmm open tags!

Gonna try starting a tag game!

Share your weird eating/drinking habits-I’ll start!

My favourite tea is not really tea at all, you see, I get your casual lemon flavoured tea and I put a whole tablespoon of honey in. ATP I just like drinking diluted honey

Oh and I also spread things onto bread using spoons instead of butter knives >:3

@youtry2replaceurself @just-some-random-anxious-bitch @starite-wishes @calverkeys @niemoc-niemoc @quamaii @lockinglooms1028 @pankakeperformer @arsonarena @happypot0001 @boxxie-does-art @nyxzn @theshakespearetrash @sailingseals @orange-theory-thinker8 @emilightniing @v0idcookies @dehydratedfluid @arcarerus @22bananapudding

[feralfication]

[georgiapeach30513]

Let Your Daddy See

Summary: Your boyfriend, Ransom knew you had a crush on the owner of the local bakery. He sees you practically drooling as you watch his hands kneading dough. Always making excuses to go to Andy’s work during his demos. Getting all flustered when he smiles at you, even offering a private lesson…if you want Andy, you can have him. For one night. But it’s Ransom’s choice. Enjoy.

Pairings: Ransom Drysdale X Reader X Andy Barber

Rating: explicit

Warnings:  explicit language, explicit sexual content, teasing, dumb sex jokes, “surprises”, threesome, unprotected sex, PIV sex, anal sex, dumbification, degradation, double penetration, creampie, cameras, surprise! 18+ ONLY

Word Count: 3.7K

Ransom Drysdale Masterlist

Andy Barber Masterlist

You take a quick peek up, and are met with his beautiful blue eyes. Close enough to see the speckling of different hues of blue. His mouth turns up into a smile, and you quickly look back down at his hands. Pushing forward, and pulling back. His veins pop up on his arms and hands with the motion. Cords of his muscles ripple on his forearms. The man did more than bake pastries. He had to have a clear an amazing workout routine that you would love to sit and watch.

Since Andy had opened Butter & Buns you found every excuse to come here on a regular basis. It had nothing to do with Andy, but his goods, at least that’s what you told yourself. He honestly does make the most spectacular delicacies. And the way he runs his patisserie is so inviting. He had demos where he made the fresh breads right in front of you.

And he is even going to be starting classes. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t think about how he would teach. Would he be the type of man that stands behind you, hands on yours as he shows you how to properly make bread? Or would he be the teacher that stands in front of you while his eyes pay more attention to the curves of your body instead, and you learn nothing at all?

He told you about the classes first of course, letting you know you are his favorite customer. You gaze over his arms again as he pushes and pulls the dough. Developing the glutens, and mixing in the butter. It is heavenly to watch. A bit distracting, but only due to how effortlessly he did that. Like a skilled ballerina up on stage. It flows and has an odd beauty to it.

“Are you getting your usual, Sweet Buns?” a girlish giggle brushes past your lips, and the quick glance up at him sends heat to your cheeks. Andy has this way of making you feel like a schoolgirl. Even your hands are clammy, and your throat dries up. “Or can I suggest something different that I know you’re going to love?” You have to look at him, but this time he catches your eyes, and you linger the hold. You couldn’t look away.

“Yeah, of course,” your voice is a whisper as you nod your head, and switch the weight on your feet.

“Oh, give me a break,” Ransom rolls his eyes beside you, and you give him a little nudge with your shoulder. He is ruining this for you.

“Why don’t you grab our coffees, and I’ll get the treats?” He smirks, rolling his eyes again. It’s one of his favorite things to do, but he does walk away to go to the front of the counter, leaving you and Andy alone. “I’m sorry about him.”

“You’d think your husband wouldn’t come in with you if he’s so easily annoyed,” there’s a slight twinkle in Andy’s eye, but you can’t quite figure it out.

“We’re not married,” you answer quickly, showing him your bare finger. “Not even engaged. He’s…” Ransom peeks over towards you, pursing his lips, and narrowing his eyes before ordering the coffee. “What are you wanting to suggest to me?” Changing the subject off your relationship is the best course of action.

“I was playing around with croissant ideas. It’s not traditional, but it’s lemon meringue.”

“It sounds perfect,” almost as perfect as his ass walking to the sink to wash his hands. He meets you down at the register, handing over Ransom’s usual mini scones before giving you his newest creation. It looks amazing, and perfect. Just like him.

“I made this specifically with you in mind, Sweet Buns,” another giggle. You love that he remembers your first encounter with him, and it has since become your nickname. Your hand brushes against his as he hands you the receipt, and his eyes linger on you as you make way to Ransom.

“I made this specifically with you in mind, Sweet Buns,” he mocks what Andy says as you sit down across from him. “Why don’t you admit you got a crush on the baker.”

“I don’t, and he’s a pastry chef,” Ransom blinks at you a few times before taking a bite of your croissant. He doesn’t want to react, but he does. A soft little moan travels up his throat, and you shimmy your shoulders. “See.”

“You completely ignored what I just said,” of course you did. It’s a silly conversation that wasn’t going to get either of you anywhere.

“I ignored you because I don’t have a crush on Andy.”

“Ahh, you just want him to fuck your sweet buns, huh?” You give him a little kick under the table, smiling at him. It is fascinating to see him get a bit jealous. He knows who you go home to, and who you want to spend the rest of your life with. “If he gets your sweet buns, what do I get?”

“You can have the warm muffin.”

“I love it when you talk dirty. So I can have the warm muffin, he gets the sweet buns, what are we going to do with your mouth?” He raises his eyebrows in a suggestive way, and now it’s you that’s rolling your eyes.

“Shut up!” You playfully say, nudging your foot at him. “You know I love you, right?” Smiling, he nods his head, taking another bite of your pastry. Rude. “But I do quite enjoy your wheels turning. Are you seriously dreaming about him with us?” He shrugs his shoulders.

“Stop eating my food. That was made just for me.”

“Unless he’s got another sweet buns that he’s not telling you about,” you are his only Sweet Buns. Andy didn’t have others that he is like this with. You’ve watched him. “If we do this can I frost your muffin and turn it into a cupcake?” You burst out laughing, throwing your head back dramatically. He is silly, even if you love his play on words.

“What is wrong with you?” Or better yet, why did he have to wait to frost your cupcake?

“Or I can always call it a pie shell. Won’t you let me make a cream pie,” he’s saying words, and you’re not sure how serious he is. You’d let him if he’d ask.

“Alright, that’s enough. Let’s go home.”

“Maybe he can butter your buns,” he’s so obnoxious sometimes. “Knead your dough. Oh oh! Maybe frost your cake,” you give a quick little wave to Andy, trying to shoo Ransom out of the shop before Andy hears what he is saying. How embarrassing. Or maybe not.

——

“Ransom! Baby, I’m home,” throwing your keys into the bowl, you remove your shoes. Slowly undressing now because it is Friday, and you are tired of this bra. “Ransom?” You couldn’t smell any cooking, so you figured he must want to go out tonight, you’ll have to persuade him to order in. You just want him, the couch, and reruns.

“Ransom?” You say his name one more time as you pull your shirt over your head, and take off your bra. He’ll be happy to see your titties free. That’s how you make sure he just orders in, and you can stay with and watch television.

“Ransom? Oh my god!” Your arms fly over your chest as Andy smiles at you devilishly. “Why are you in my house, and in my fucking room?”

“It does look like a nice fucking…room,” creep. He was attractive in his place. Being alone in your house with you. And… “Ransom, she did make a great entrance,” your boyfriend steps out of the en-suite, and you look between the two of them. The little slut!

They are up to something, and you just want to rest. In between them. “What is this?”

“Angel,” uh uh. Anytime Ransom starts a sentence with that, he’s up to something. Needing you to forgive him immediately. And of course that makes sense since Andy Barber is in your bedroom with you and your boyfriend all while your arms are over your chest, covering yourself.

Rolling your eyes, you happen to catch a peek, and Andy is a full mast. Pants are completely tented, and you feel a rush of heat pool at your core. He’s as big as you imagined, bigger even. This is about that conversation you had Butter & Buns! Ransom brought this man here for a threesome, and both men are ready to go.

“I had some thoughts about our conversation the other day…”

“And I overheard everything,” oh my god! Andy overheard every stupid joking detail. This is too much. “And I approached Ransom.”

“No, you didn’t. I went back to the buttery buns, and approached you.”

“You stuttered, and couldn’t get the question out, so I proposed a deal. I get your ass, if you agree.”

“But I’m in control,” it is like watching a ping pong match as the two of them go back and forth. Each making sure you know that they’re more manly than the other with no regard of what you want. You didn’t ask for this. Ransom and Andy just assumed. They didn’t exactly assume wrong.

You have dreamed of this very moment. You didn’t want Andy in your life, you just wanted him in your body. Have a little fun with your boyfriend. He did say his fantasy was to watch you be destroyed before he joins in. Watch as your cunt is being refused stimulation, and he waits for you to beg before joining in. You just don’t beg. You never beg.

Okay, maybe you have dreamed about the man destroying you being Andy once or twice. But the principle of the matter is they didn’t ask. “Angel, if you didn’t want me to know that you have fantasized about this, maybe you shouldn’t leave your fucking journal open on the bed. With a very detailed explanation of what you want Mr. Butters and me to do to you.”

“You caught that, huh?” Ransom is far from being dumb, but sometimes he just needs a little nudging, especially since you found out that he wanted Andy to be the man that joined you. You gave him a little hint by leaving your journal on his side of the bed.

“You made it obvious. So quit playing coy. On your knees. I can literally smell your arousal. You know I know your cunt better than you do. On your knees, and let Andy fuck your ass. I won’t ask again. And be a good girl, and drop your arms. Go on. Let me see.”

He’s such an ass when he’s right. You let your arms fall, and you glance towards Andy. His eyes coast down your body as you start to pull your pants down. Andy licks his lips as he stares at your pebbled peaks. He’s ready to devour you. Ready to turn you into the mush, and become completely pliable like his doughs.

You came home tired, but a new sense of invigoration courses through your body as the bed dips down with your weight. Leaning forward you let your head rest completely on the mattress, and your ass full on in the air. Both men walk behind you, their eyes taking in your sex before Ransom’s lithe fingers move through your folds.

“She’s soaked,” he moans before slapping at Andy’s hand. “Nope, you can’t touch her until I say so. You must inspect the goods. She expects this from me. See,” he pulls you apart at the seam. Spreading you out fully for Andy’s hungry eyes. “The tightest pussy I’ve ever felt. But this…this pretty little hole,” Ransom spits down at your puckered entrance before rubbing it around your muscle.

“This is going to be all yours. You can’t have her needy little cunt. But her ass is just as greedy, watch,” you whimper as he presses a finger past the tight rim. Pushing yourself back into him. “Go on, I’ll warm her up, but you get nice and lubed. She has a bit of an attitude problem, but you fill her up, and she’s the most obedient little sex doll, aren’t ya? Such a little slut drunk on cock.”

Your brain goes fuzzy as you anticipate two cocks at once. Overwhelmed is a perfect word for it. Feeling all the feels, while Ransom pumps his finger in and out of you, and his sinful mouth never shuts up. “You can come in her or on her, but you can’t have that tight little pussy, okay?” Andy groans, coating his cock in lube.

He fists his thick veiny member a few times, starting to move closer. Ransom’s need for mirrors in the bedroom is paying off. You’re able to see Andy’s wide body and thick hands take in your holes. He looks massive behind you. “She’s so pretty when she gets stuffed, too. Look at her, ass in the air, and ready to be fucked so hard. In and out. Filled fully. Every little hole.”

Andy clears his throat, and Ransom reluctantly pulls his finger out of your ass. Smiling when you whine at the loss of him. Starting to rock on your knees because you need a replacement. “Easy, Sweet Buns,” his thick hands grab tight to your hips, digging into your skin with so much force you hope it bruises. Andy teases your tight hole with his cock. “You going to be a cockslut for us?”

“Mhmm,” mewling as his blunt mushroom tip breaches your entrance. Your fingers grip tight to the bed, and your eyes shoot open, trying to find your boyfriend’s handsome face. Staring at him with so much need as Andy slowly sinks into you. Doesn’t stop until he’s balls deep in your ass, and you're ready for Ransom to fill you up, too. You need him. It isn’t fair you can’t have him, too.

“Shh,” he sighs, petting your face. “Let big daddy Andy have some fun, okay?” You nod your head, but reach towards Ransom. Holding onto his hand as Andy slowly pulls out of you, and crashes back into your warmth. Yipping when he does it again quickly.

You never look anywhere, but Ransom’s handsome face. The way he’s adoring you even more for allowing your crush to own your ass. Rutting into you at such a steady pace, and yet you still feel empty. Ransom belongs in you as well. “You’re doing such a good job.”

“Sweet buns, you should really get on top of me. Let your boyfriend watch that neglected cunt as I fill every inch of your ass. He can see that pretty pussy weeping with need for him. Crying out for him because you need him so much. Doesn’t that sound good?”

“Yes! Yes!” Shouting because you need Ransom to see how empty you are without him. How much you need him inside of you more than some fantasy. “Please!” He nods his head, and Andy pulls out of you, and crawls on the bed. Letting you turn your back to him as you settle over top.

Able to watch every part of Ransom as you slowly sink over him. Moaning as your body swallows him whole, and Ransom’s eyes go to your core. Staring so hard at where he is supposed to be. You’ve already told him too many times that your body was made for him. “Do you like it, Ran?”

“Yes, very much so, kitty cat,” placing your hands behind you, and on either side of Andy, you start bouncing over top of him. Letting Ransom see a part of you not filled with him letting her beg him, because you won’t with words. Your body cries for him to enter you as your arousal leaks onto Andy. “You’re so perfect,” he moans, and you go harder.

Bucking on top of Andy, and ready to whine out Ransom’s name. “Make yourself come first. You needy little brat. If you want two cocks, come. Go on. You can do it,” you slam yourself over him harder. Enjoying the view even if it's torturous. “You’re almost there. You’ve got this. Keep going. Don’t stop. That pretty pussy needs my pretty cock inside of her, huh?”

“Yeah. Please. Ransom, I’m…” heat and pleasure rush to your core. It’s almost cruel to come like this. A big part of you is being ignored, and no matter what you do, Ransom isn’t budging. “Ransom, I’m…”

“Then do it, you filthy little slut,” that does it. Pleasure shoots into every part of your limbs as your eyes roll into the back of your head. Slowing down your movements, but Andy picks up where you leave off. “Clenching around nothing, and I got the front row seat to heaven,” his voice is so deep as he stares at your empty cunt.

Getting onto the bed before his lips meet yours. He tastes like sin and dessert as he swallows your moans, “You needed this,” he says before crashing into you. Both men pause as sounds you’ve never made before scream out of your lungs.

Giving you a grace period for you to adjust to just how incredibly full you feel. Stretched out in the most perfect way, and getting to have and feel Ransom finally. He fits so perfectly inside you. You’ve never doubted how he is made for you. He even feels just as much pleasure as you, just feeling how different this is. It’s overwhelming. Blinding. Makes you feel as if you’ve ascended to heaven.

Everything in your body ceases to stop functioning. You’re just there. Existing for nothing but pleasure. Obviously for them, but what you feel is like a religious experience. Floating in the air with the most beautiful high encasing your body.

“There she is,” Ransom coos down to you. “I thought I’d lost you to the pleasure,” what is he talking about? You’re just feeling. “I think you blacked out for a minute. Just kept saying my name, but barely.”

“Mmm.”

“Cockdrunk,” Andy is just a vessel. A tool to add to the fun. If it wasn’t for the severe amount of fullness you feel, you wouldn't know he is even there. All you care about is Ransom. Head rolling around on your shoulders. “Alright, let’s flip. You just lay there, and take care of your girl, while I fuck her.”

“You want that, baby? You want Andy to fuck you.”

“You.”

“You’re too far gone, baby. Yeah, we’ll switch,” you want to cry as Ransom pulls out of you. Already reaching out to him as he lays down on the bed. “Come on. C’mere,” it’s Andy that helps you move over to him. Guiding you to sink over Ransom, and you start kissing on his beautiful face. “I know. I know.”

The last words you remember as Andy slams into you, and you scream. Fuck it feels so good. So full. So very full. If you could float out of your body, and watch this experience you would. The world doesn’t exist. It’s just nirvana. You try and ground yourself with the touch of Ransom, because he is perfect. Rubbing over your face. Whispering your name because you forgot.

Andy’s movements are harsh and about him getting off; Ransom is about you and him. So sweet. So perfect. So in love with him. You didn’t think you could love him more, but a man willing to have another man in your bed because you’ve fantasized about it is the perfect man. “Ransom!”

“I know, just let go. Come on two cocks,” his hips drive up into you, and you collapse on his chest. Incoherently saying his name. “Come,” he whispers into your ears, and rockets go off in your body. Shooting endorphins and pleasure to every nerve ending as your body seizes up. This is it, the true escape of the world, and absolute bliss.

“She’s. So. Fucking. Tight,” Andy grunts, thrusting into you so hard your body lurches forward. “So. Fucking. Good. Ugh!” Growling behind you as his movements become irregular. “Right. There!” It’s like everybody’s body is synchronized. Your walls flutter around their cocks, and they each shoot warm ropes of thick cum into your body, and you’re buzzing. A high like no other.

Long weeks are meant for going dumb, and what better way to escape than this. Andy pants behind you, while Ransom’s fingers softly caress your body. His lips ghost over your skin, and you feel yourself start to drift. Feeling so comfortable and exhausted from the week.

“I thought I was supposed to come in,” you relax on top of Ransom’s body, soaking up the afterglow of his release. He feels so warm inside of you. His cum right where it belongs. He wasn’t ever going to waste a drop again.

“Shh,” Ransom says softly as Andy pulls out of your body.

“No, you said if I set up the cameras, that I could fuck her mouth,” Andy rolls his eyes, grabbing a camera off the tripod and points it at your used holes. “Oh, yeah, don’t forget the money shot. But you wanted all her holes to be dripping in cum. It was a gift before you propos…”

“Jake! Shut up!” Jake Jensen mumbles something under his breath. You nuzzle into Ransom more before you drift off to sleep. You’ve never felt more satisfied. “Yes, next time I’ll make sure she’s airtight, but we got to ease her into it. And besides…”

“We know, Drysdale,” Andy hands Jake the camera before going to his clothes, “You’re marrying the girl, but she is okay with being used from time to time. Did you even know she was interested in Jake before her journal?”

“Nope. Why would she be into him?”

“I’m right here, and I am lovable!”

“Alright, go on. Next time I’ll| make her watch herself being used first. Maybe over some sweet buns,” Ransom gives a little chuckle to Andy. “There there, sweetheart, these men are going to leave, and I’m going to give us a bath. The rest of the weekend is about you. You’ve had such a hard night.”

No. It was almost perfect. Almost.

Masterlist

@tis-thedamn-season @marveloustaylortot @pono-pura-vida @peaches1958 @seitmai

@smile1318 @andydrysdalerogers @cjand10 @midnightramyeoncravings @kmc1989

@pandaxnienke @donutloverxo @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @bambamwolf87 @rogersbarber 

@harrysthiccthighss @distractingbeth @musingsfromthemitten

[stevieschrodinger]

Part One Two Three Four Five

“So Steve, I know you said that you don’t think you need anyone...” Eddie sighs, “do you think that implies that I think that what he thinks is wrong?”

“I think it implies you’ve lost your fucking mind.”

Eddie doesn’t even have the energy to glare at Dustin, it’s much easier to just pretend he hasn’t spoken, “okay, Steve-”

“Yeap, you’re really strong on establishing you know the guys name, which is like, a solid point in your favor.”

“I hate you,” Eddie says to the ceiling, neck at an odd angle where he’s flopped his head back over the arm of the couch, “so, Steve, I know you said you don’t need anyone, and you are totally right-”

“You’re a strong independent Omega who don’t need no Alpha!”

“So help me Henderson I will throw you out,” Eddie waits, but Dustin is finally silent on the matter, “Steve. I totally respect the fact that you are absolutely fine handling everything alone, and if you’re...happy with us, being friends, then I’m happy with that too. I did wonder, though, if you’d like to go on a date. With me. Maybe?” Eddie sighs, flopping his arms over his face, “I’m so bad at this. This is going to go so wrong and he’s going to hate me and never want to see me again and-”

“Eddie...has the Omega broken your brain? What the fuck is wrong with you man-”

“I don’t know! I don’t...I’ve literally never felt this way before, not about anyone. And Jamie, man, I know he’s not my pup, okay, Steve and I aren't dating, he’s literally my friends pup, that’s it but...I swear I would die for that kid, no question.”

“Okay...so just...ask him out? Steve I mean, not Jamie-”

Eddie huffs, “I don’t...I’m pretty sure I can’t. The more I think about it the more it feels...like Steve’s had a pretty bad run of Alphas, it sounds like, and I just don’t think he’d be interested. And he’s just literally had a pup, like Jamie is only just a month old, who am I to add to that, you know? Steve’s got enough to think about.”

“So...don’t ask him out?”

Eddie flops over onto his side, curling up so he can smush his face into the cushions, “but I really want to. I think it’s selfish though. I’m being selfish. I should just...be a good friend. Keep being a good friend.”

“And pine to death?”

“I mean. Seems like a reasonable way out.”

“Dude I do not know what to say to you,” the timer on the oven starts to buzz, “but at least you’re going to feed me, right?”

Eddie sighs, dragging himself out of the near suffocating safety of the gap in the couch cushions. He opens his message thread with Steve, scrolling back through the shared memes and screenshots and pictures. He reads little tidbits of conversation while he pulls out bowls and plates. The three dots appear, Eddie’s heart leaps a little because Steve is, right there. Right next door, with his phone in his hand, typing to Eddie.

‘I’d love some. I’ve made a banana cream pie if you want to take it back for your games night.’

Eddie sends back a shocked emoji, ‘I can’t take an entire pie.’

‘You won’t, my slice will be gone.’

Eddie smiles and slips his phone into his pocket. He slices two thick pieces of bread from the loaf he made this afternoon, wraps them, and then fills a bowl with casserole. Eddie’s pretty sure this bowl is Steve’s anyway; so many of their plates and bowls have been migrating back and forth it’s hard to tell any more, between Eddie’s dinners and Steve’s desserts.

He likes to bake something extra special for games nights though, he always says you can’t make just one cookie, or one slice of pie. He likes to make sweet things when he knows there will be people to give it to, otherwise, “I’ll just eat the whole thing Eddie!”

Eddie doesn’t see a problem with eating the whole thing, but he slips on his adventure crocs and heads out into the hall. Dustin doesn’t even tease too badly any more, even though Eddie’s sure it’s because he’s threatened to withhold Steve’s desserts.

Eddie knocks with the hand holding the bread, letting himself in when Steve calls, “it’s open!”

“Hey Steve, hey Jamie,” he sets Steve’s dinner on the little table, next to the juice and cutlery Steve’s already set out for himself.

“What do you have planned for them tonight?” Steve brings out a pie on a plate, a slice already gone, just like he said. It has real neat swirls of cream on top; it looks professional to Eddie, like you’d buy in a store.

“Destruction. Misery. Suffering. The usual.”

Steve hums, “uh hu. What color salad did you decide on in the end?”

Eddie sighs, “you say it Slaad. And I don’t know, what do you think?”

“I actually quite liked the idea for the dog shark thing, it was cute,” Steve hands over the pie, going on tip toes to kiss Eddie on the cheek as he hands it over.

“One home brew Bulette, coming right up,” Eddie replies absently. He’s pretty sure he’s gone at least a little pink, and Steve’s scent is fresh and bright in his nose for a moment, “I’d better…” Eddie gestures lamely with the pie, “you know.”

“Have fun!” Steve calls as Eddie lets himself out, “don’t go too hard on them!”

Eddie’s doing his best not too stare, he really is.

He has one foot on the stroller, rolling it gently back and forward. He has his guitar resting on the other knee, he strums, singing quietly to Jamie, “I'd rather be a forest than a street, yes, I would...if I could, I surely would.” Jamie burbles at him, waving his arms a little and making happy pup noises.

On the court, Steve laughs, and Eddie fails, and he looks. Steve’s wearing a tank top and those obscenely short shorts. Him and Chrissy are bouncing the ball at each other, catching it, doing a squat, a little jump, and bouncing it back. They’ve done all sorts of stuff like this, sweaty jock games. Steve’s short shorts riding up even further at the slightest provocation.

Jamie makes a noise, drawing Eddie’s attention back, “I'd rather feel the earth beneath my feet, yes, I would...if I could, I surely would,” Eddie sings, soft and slow.

Steve and Chrissy come over eventually, Steve lifting the bottom of his shirt to wipe at his sweaty face, fully showing Eddie his tummy in all it’s glory. It’s thick, but firm, decorated by a handful of stretch marks and a perfect dusting of happy trail, “thanks for keeping an eye.”

“Huh?” Eddie asks, feeling kind of dumb but still managing to strum along on auto pilot.

Next to him, Chrissy snickers around her water bottle.

“Thank you, for watching Jamie,” Steve says to him more slowly, smirking, his sweaty hair flopping across his forehead.

“Right, right, sure, of course. Anytime. Pleasure. Really.”

Next to him, Chrissy huffs. Eddie pointedly ignores it.

The knocking is awful. It’s relentless. It’s obnoxious. It’s definitely Robin.

“I know you’re in there!”

Yeap. Yeap that’s definitely Robin. Eddie groans into the couch cushion before dragging himself up. She’s speaking before he has the door fully open, “this is getting old.”

“And what might that be-”

Robin puts on the most obnoxious voice Eddie thinks he’s ever heard, she clasps her hands together, holding them to her chest and she bats her lashes coquettishly at the ceiling, “oh Eddie’s cooking is just the best ever. Did you know he plays guitar! He says he’ll teach Jamie when he’s old enough! And he’s so smart, he’s got so many books in his apartment-”

“Okay.”

“Did you know he’s artistic! He paints his little dungeon game miniatures and they’re so good-”

“All right.”

“You should just see him with Jamie-”

“Robin.”

“And he’s such a good Alpha! He’s so good to his friends, he puts in so much work-”

“And we are done,” Eddie goes to shut the door. He can’t handle this. He knows Robin probably means well, in her own meddling way, but he just...can’t. This has to be Steve’s choice, right? Steve’s been pretty clear why he went it alone, and Robin is just...teasing him. It makes Eddie feel all warm and bubbly inside, knowing that Steve says these things about him, that Steve...likes him. But...Steve has a pup, and just because he says these things behind closed doors, it doesn’t mean Eddie has any right to know them.

No matter how it makes him feel.

“Wait wait wait...can’t you just, ask him out? End all of our suffering?”

Eddie sighs, “Steve has enough going on without me making it more complicated, okay? Steve can...he’s perfectly capable of telling me this himself.”

“No he isn’t. Because Steve would never ask you to take on another Alpha’s pup.”

“He’s not another Alpha’s pup, he’s Steve’s pup,” Eddie tells her reflexively.

“Uh hu,” she has her hands on her hips now, looking at him expectantly.

Eddie swallows thickly, and he can’t quite look at Robin, “what if...what if I loose him?”

“You won’t. You know you won’t.”

“But-”

“Me and Chrissy are taking Jamie for the night, did you know that? Giving Steve a night off, and we’re getting some practice in for when we’re ready to have our own, you know?”

“I...did not know that.”

“Yeah.”

Eddie stands for a second, not sure what to say, down the hall, Steve’s door opens.

“-and it’s in the changing bag.”

“I got it.”

“Don’t forget to heat the formula to-”

“Steve,” Chrissy sounds exasperated, “we’ve got it,” she has Jamie in his car seat.

“Plus,” Robin whispers to him conspiratorially, “he’s going to have a heat at some point, so we gotta be ready for that. You know, wouldn’t be fair to which ever Alpha ends up helping him out-”

“I know what you’re doing,” Eddie growls, watching Steve fuss over the pup.

“Is it working?”

“Go away.”

Robin shrugs, and Eddie watches as she goes to Chrissy, taking the bag so Chrissy is just left with the car seat, “it’s going to be fine, and you can call us any time.”

Eddie ends up watching Steve, as Steve watches his pup and his friends disappear at the end of the hall. His shoulder sag a little, and Eddie can't help but go to him.

“Hey.”

Steve sighs, “would it be weird if we followed them?”

“Maybe. I’ll drive though.”

Steve smiles up at him, and it looks kind of watery, “what if we break into their place and take him back?”

Eddie shrugs, “pretty sure we could just ask but, whatever makes you feel better, I guess.”

Steve sighs, “I sound crazy,” and a tear finally escapes, sliding down his cheek.

Eddie can’t help but scoop him up into a big hug, “I think you sound like the best dad in the world. I’ll get you one of those mugs. You know, for fathers day.”

Steve sighs, and sniffles, “thanks Eddie.”

“You want take out? I’ve primed you a miniature, if you still want to try your hand.”

“Can we watch a shit film too?”

“Oh fuck me I’d love to watch a shit film,” Eddie says vehemently into Steve’s hair.

Steve laughs against his chest.

Steve doesn’t have it in him to try painting his owlbear tonight; he picks forlornly at his duck rolls, “I’m sorry I’m not very good company.”

“It’s okay, I get it...I miss him too.”

“Oh, so you admit I’m being shit company?” Steve smiles for the first time this evening.

“Oh, yeah, the absolute worst.”

Steve phone pings and he practically dives for it, but then he melts, face going soft as he looks at the message, “Jamie’s asleep,” he shows Eddie the picture.

“Safe and sound,” Eddie reassures Steve for probably the fifteenth time this evening.

“I didn’t...I mean I knew I’d love my pup but...I didn’t know it would feel like this, you know? It feels crazy. And I mean...Jamie’s happy, and healthy, and that just makes absolutely everything feel...right? Does that make sense? Like...fulfilled.”

“I...yeah. I think I understand,” Eddie tells him quietly, because he feels like that about the both of them, as long as Steve, and by extension, Jamie, are both happy and healthy then...yeah. Yeah, the whole world feels like it’s an okay place to be.

“Eddie I-”

“Steve-”

They speak over each other, and end up laughing, leaning closer together on the couch. The remains of Steve’s half eaten dinner get moved to the safety of the coffee table. They’re close enough then that Eddie can see the dim light from the TV reflecting in Steve’s eyes.

“You go,” Eddie whispers to him.

Steve shakes his head, but takes Eddie’s hand in both of his, rubbing his thumb over Eddie’s knuckles, Steve whispers back, “you first.”

“I...I really like having you in my life Steve. And I don’t want to...to fuck that up, by expecting more from you.”

“I...yeah. Same.”

“Same?” It comes out as a surprised laugh.

Steve’s laughing too now, “what do you want me to say I mean...you pretty much covered it.”

“I have spent ages agonizing over this and and and- all I get is- yeah. Same. I guess. I suppose.”

Steve is properly laughing now, “come here, I’m sorry, I’m sorry” he pulls Eddie close, and manages to stop laughing long enough to kiss his cheek, “okay,” Steve takes a deep breath, “I’ve just had a pup, and both me and that pup care about you so very much, and I did not want to mess it up by expecting you to take that on, okay?”

“You’re not a chore Steve, neither of you are a chore.”

“I mean he was sick on me the other day and that kind of felt-”

Eddie cuts him off with a kiss. It’s soft, a gentle press of lips that Steve...sighs into. Relaxes into. Lets Eddie take both their weight. Steve’s hands find their way into Eddie’s hair as Eddie gently wets Steve’s lip, and Steve lets him in.

It feels like coming home.

[seaslugfanclub]

These Aren’t the Candy Stripers, but They’ll Do

Hades, Jafar, Captain Hook x Sick!Reader

————————————————————————

“Uuuuughhhh”

“Wh- ew, the hell’s wrong with you?”

Hades stared down in mild disgust at (Y/N)’s collapsed body, Hook who was knelt besides them petting their hair, looked up at the god,

“The poor dog’s sick, that’s what. Pallor as a corpse and twice as clammy.”

“Oh. Yeeesh kid, why even bother showin’ up today?”

“Well I asked them the same thing, and all I got in response was them mumbling something about ‘attaining bread’… their fever must’ve made the poppet delusional.” Hook lifted (Y/N) up from beneath their shoulders, their body now limply resting against his own.

Hades rubbed the back of his neck, a slight pang of worry sparking in his chest as (Y/N) hacked into their arm. He remembered how mortals used to keel over from these types of things….

“Searching for sourdough aside, they can’t be here.”

“You don’t say?” Hook cooed sarcastically, “well what do you suggest we do?”

The flames atop Hades head flickered, the god hemming and hawing, before snapping his fingers.

“Why, we take ‘em home of course!”

Hook stared, his thin mustache twitching as he tried to conceal the sneer threatening to overtake his face. (Y/N) shifted uncomfortably at Hooks tightening grasp.

“Blow me down, that’s just a marvelous idea! We’ll just tell the management that we’ll be leaving company grounds, driving a car that neither of us know how to use to (Y/N)’s home that we don’t know the location of! Brilliant old sport!!”

Hades looked down at the foppish pirate, nonplussed, before spreading his arms out

“James- pal—“

“You don’t get to call me James.”

“…James, pal— I think you forget the company that you’re in. We just happen to be amongst some of the slimiest, conniving, intelligent schmucks ever dreamed up. Here- pick ‘em up and walk with me.”

Against Hooks better judgement, he obliged to the god. Lifting the delirious attendant in his arm and following Hades down the hall.

“Me and a few others ‘ave been speaking about this for a while, y’know— letting bygone be bygones and getting our Σκατά together.”

“And why haven’t been included in these… ‘discussions’?” Hook asked, feeling slightly offended at being un-included

Hades waved his hands, “Ah, not important! This isn’t about you, it’s about our sweet (Y/N) getting proper home rest.”

Looking away from Hades after his dismissal of Hooks question, he realized where the god had been leading the trio, the door to Jafars room slightly open.

Hades, not even considering knocking, swung open the door to reveal Jafar, who was sat at his work desk and buffing his turban.

“WHA— Do you ever knock!?!?”

“What are you, a teenage girl? C’mon. (Y/N)’s sick and we’re taking ‘em home, time to do what we talked about.”

Jafar looked past Hades broad figure at Hook, then down at (Y/N) in his arms. Even in their feverish state, they managed to raise their arm in greeting. The irritated look across his face softened a bit.

“Ah, well then. Give me a moment”

Jafar stood from his seat, grabbing his turban off its stand and placing it back on his head. He then reached down to pick up his staff that rested beside him.

“Who is it we need to persuade?”

“Persuade? Just what in Neptunes name are two blithering about!?” Hook finally interrupted, his patience already strung thin.

“Patience Captain, it will all be explained in a moment~ Now Hades, please lead the way.” Jafar walked toward the trio, joining them in the hallway. He leaned over (Y/N), eyes furrowed as he watched sweat roll down their forehead.

“Oh, they really don’t look good.”

“Exactly, that’s why we need to have a talk with their shift supervisor about taking them home.” Hades began down the hall, not waiting for the others to catch up.

————————————————————————

“Are you two positive this will work?”

“I didn’t become the royal vizier through sheer luck. It’s best you have some faith in me.”

The group stood outside the (Y/N)’s shift supervisors office. Hades rested against the wall with (Y/N) in his arms, Hook needing a break after carrying them for at least an hour.

“They’ve been here long enough, let’s get them the rest they deserve.” Jafar said, rapping his knuckles against the door, “Watch a professional at work.”

The office door opened, the supervisor failing to hide his shock at the sight of the villains.

“Oh! Uh—Jafar? What’s up?”

Jafar gestured towards (Y/N) with his staff, the motion hiding the ruby eyes of the cobra beginning to glow.

“Your hardworking employee, (Y/N), has fallen ill. You will let them off early and give them a fully paid sick leave.”

The supervisors eyes glazed over, the red glow from the staff reflecting off his irises.

“Sick?….of course…they deserve rest..”

Hook stared in shock, having never seen Jafars powers up close before. Hades didn’t care to look, a satisfied smirk growing on his face as he used his heat to keep (Y/N) from shivering.

Jafar grinned, stifling a chuckle as he held his staff closer towards the shift supervisor’s face,

“We will also be taking our darling attendant home, so clear our schedules as well.”

The man muttered something incoherent, turning stiffly towards his work computer, most likely to log (Y/N) sick leave.

Jafar closed the door, turning around to the mildly horrified Hook and a very pleased Hades.

“Look at you, stretch face! Seems like you still got it!” Hades praised, adjusting his hold of (Y/N) to give the sorcerer a flaming thumbs up.

“Yes, now that the… ‘official’ side of this has been dealt with, let’s get the dear home. Are their keys in their locker?”

“Ooh~ way ahead of ya!” With a flick of his wrist, plumes of smoke accumulated in his palm, before disappearing to reveal (Y/N)’s bag.

“Here, catch.” Hades threw the bag at Hook, who fumbled to grab it with his hand, still very much in shock.

“Wha— how- You can use your magic!?” Hook manage to get out, following behind Hades and Jafar towards the exit of the studio. “I thought they left your magic behind when they brought us all here!?”

“Yeah, so did we. That was actually true for a while, but a few weeks back Maleficent sprouted a thorn bush through the floor during one of her fits.”

A slightly yellowed exit sign hung over the back doors of the studio, the employees parking lot visible through the glass of the doors. With a push, Jafar opened the exit doors, letting Hades crouch through the doorframe, Hook following suit, the pirate quickly thanking Jafar.

“So— of course she told us all, and after a few tests ourselves, some of our magic was returning.”

“But not in full, that little trick of mine back there used up all my energy. But it was more magic compared to a few weeks ago,”

Jafar turned to look at Hook, a near manic smile on his face,

“We’re getting our power back.”

————————————————————————

They made their way down the rows of cars, each of them still unfamiliar with modern day technology.

“So, which one of these machines belongs to (Y/N)?” Jafar asked, playing with the feather atop his turban

“If I had to guess, it’d be that beast there.” The Captain gestured with his hook towards a specific car. The car displayed a strange custom license plate, with stickers of (Y/N)s favorite media covering the sides of the trunk window, one specific sticker proudly reading ‘I❤️dilfs’.

“Yep, that’s the one.”

Hook opened (Y/N)’s bag, rummaging around before pulling out a lanyard at least 2 pounds heavy with the amount of keychains on it.

“Oh, for the love of—”

Combing through the keychains finally reveals a set of car keys.

Hades took the keys from Hook and pressed the button to unlock the doors.

“Alright get in. Here—Jafar, you sit with (Y/N) in the back. James, you get passenger seat.”

After some glorified hot potato with (Y/N)s body, everyone got into their seats. Their attendants head resting on Jafars lap as Hades and Hook fiddled with the dashboard. Hades put the keys into the ignition like he’d seen on Tv, but anything after that stumped him.

“This isn’t like any boat I’ve ever steered..”

“No kidding, this isn’t exactly a chariot ride either. But that’s where I put my title of god to good use.”

A look of concentration passed over Hades face, his brows furrowed as he gripped the steering wheel. After a minute, tiny blue flames traveled down Hades arms and across the steering wheel and dashboard. In a flash of heat, the car started, engine rumbling and lights on.

“YES! Hades rules!!” The god cheered, pumping his fists and singeing the roof of the car.

Hook flinched at the sudden movement, gripping the leather seat and slightly tearing it with his hook.

Hades turned towards the men, moving his eyebrows,

“Check this out~”

The car began to slowly reverse, Hades hands nowhere near the wheel. The car steered itself out of the parking spot and began to drive out of the employee lot.

“Incredible…” Hook whispered to himself, even Jafar was silently impressed.

Somehow, (Y/N) broke through unconsciousness, looking around blearily,

“I didn’t buy a plan ticket…?”

“Don’t worry (Y/N), this puppy already knows where to go. Just hold tight and rest up.”

“Ah.. just wake me up when we land..” they mumbled as their fever overtook them.

“I forget (Y/N) has a life outside of us,” Jafar mused, “I wonder what little hovel they call home..”

————————————————————————

When Jafar called (Y/N)s home a Hovel, he had only been partly joking, he didn’t expect his darling to live somewhere like…this.

The car had managed to drive the forty five minute long journey to (Y/N)s house without incident, save for the confused looks from drivers in passing cars. But as closer the car grew to (Y/N)s home, so did the men’s concern.

“Blimey, I’ve seen pirate coves in better condition..” Hook grimaced.

“Yeah no kiddin’… I thought for a second that this car took a wrong turn into the underworld.” Hades chuffed, squinting out the window at a raccoon making off with what seemed like full pack of beer.

The car slowly pulled into a parking lot of a dingy apartment complex, stopping neatly between some other cars and turning off.

“Well— let’s get ‘em home.” Hades ordered, everyone getting out of the car and walking towards the complex. It seemed like no one was outside their apartments, but the villains didn’t want to take any chances, quickly hurrying to a partially covered area.

Hades looked down at (Y/N)s body, which was now being carried by Jafar, and began to slightly nudge their shoulder.

“Babe— Kid, wake up.”

(Y/N) coughed, blinking away sleep to look up at the god.

“We’re here. What’s your apartment number?”

It took a few minutes for the question to be processed before (Y/N) finally responded, the number just barely being whispered out before falling back asleep.

“I don’t like how unresponsive they’ve been, we need to get them to bed.” Hook murmured, taking the lead.

Hook read each individual address before stopping at the correct number. Hades fished the keys out of his chiton, and unlocked the faux wooden door, revealing (Y/N)s home.

The men gaped at the interior. The inside of (Y/N)s apartment was a polar opposite to the filth and chintzy neighborhood. Sure—the apartment was a glorified broom closet, but (Y/N) had managed to work with the space, decorating the interior as tastefully as their budget allowed.

The walls were covered in art prints and photographs of (Y/N)s family, and every surface was covered in trinkets. Even the air smelt like them, a mix of natural musk and their favorite detergent.

For a moment, the villains felt like they were intruding on some sacred space, never having been surrounded by so much… (Y/N), before.

Jafar pushed past the others, walking towards (Y/N)s unmade bed. The rested the attendant down on the mattress, taking their shoes off and pulling the covered over their body.

“Well at least they’re in a proper bed,” Jafar mused “I’ll check the washroom for anything to break their fever.”

Hook looked down at (Y/N), whose pained expression had now softened at being in bed. He strained his mind to remember what his mother had done when he was sick, everything before Neverland was a blur, but through hazy scenes and faces he remembered a blurry bowl of soup being presented to him.

“They’ll need something to take the medicine with. I’ll look through the dears kitchen for something to cook up.” The pirate spoke up, looking up at Hades for confirmation before walking into the small kitchen across from (Y/N)s bed.

That left Hades alone, standing at the foot of (Y/N)s bed. For a moment he just watched the rising and falling of their chest, the sight of a living body being almost uncomfortably unfamiliar.

A shine caught Hades eye, his attention turning towards the picture frame on (Y/N)s bedside table. Other than an empty glass and some medication bottles, the photograph was the only thing noteworthy near his park attendants bed.

Hades leaned down, taking the photograph into his hands for a closer look, only to nearly drop it when he realized what this photo was.

It was the picture that (Y/N) had taken of all the Villains in the studio, after the 100th year anniversary celebration. Each Villains expression a range of confusion and joy. Thinking back to that day, Hades was sure that was the first time any of the Villains were actually happy since they were brought to ‘life’.

And here it was, neatly displayed in an expensive looking frame.

“Geez kid… we-” Hades paused, for the first time in his miserable existence, he was at a loss for words.

“We really mean something to you, don’t we?..”

————————————————————————

The feeling of something cool against their head was what woke (Y/N) up. They cursed at their consciousness, being met with a headache.

For a moment they just stayed still, trying to remember why they were asleep in the first place.

They knew that they woke up with a fever, and tried to push through it, but everything after that was a blur. All they remember was the sensation of being carried, and….being on a plane?

(Y/N) opened their eyes, rubbing the crust away before reaching towards the wet sensation on their forehead. Pulling away the object, they saw it was an old washcloth.

“What…”

Groggy and a little anxious at not being able to recall most of their day, (Y/N) sat up, now realizing they were in bed…back in their apartment.. still dressed in their work clothes..

“Poppet!”

(Y/N)s eyes darted towards their kitchen, mouth falling open in shock at the sight of Hook in their apron, holding a ladle. The man had a rare smile, furthering (Y/N)s confusion.

“James? Wh—am I still dreaming?”

Hook gave them an odd look, before shaking his head and disappearing into the kitchen.

“Oh no, dear. This is actually the first time you’ve woken since we brought you home.” Hook spoke before calling out, “They’re awake, men!”

Shuffling was heard beyond (Y/N)s bed, Hades and Jafar rushing towards their attendant.

“Kid!! How’r ya feeling?”

“You had us worried half to death, I had half the mind to begin blood letting to release the bad humors myself.”

(Y/N) just stared at the men, processing everything that is happening before croaking out,

“I’m pulling through…but what the hell??”

“You collapsed at work (Y/N).” Hades spoke, using (Y/N)s real name to relay his seriousness. “Hook found ya in the hallway with one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel. We took it upon ourselves to bring you home!”

“…Okay…” (Y/N) nodded, “how?”

“We drove you home, of course!” Jafar grinned. “We’ll tell you all the details later, long conversations aren’t fitting for a fever.”

“Aye, that’s why we’re here, who best to take care of you than the greatest minds ever drawn?” Hook finally walked into the bedroom, holding a steaming bowl. He cut through the others, placing the bowl into (Y/N)’s hands.

“Here, love. You need something in your stomach to for the medicine to take effect.”

(Y/N) managed to break their eyes away from the men, taking the bowl and bringing it to their lips, lightly blowing before taking a long sip.

The soup was… edible. (Y/N) could tell Hook had used measly ingredients left over in the kitchen. The soup being a strange amalgamation of tinned fish and wilted herbs, but still, it sat warm in (Y/N)s stomach.

“Thank you for the soup, James” (Y/N) spoke, their voice now clearer from the warm broth, “I’m already feeling better.”

Hook preened, ignoring the withering looks from Hades and Jafar.

“No, seriously. Thank you, guys. I don’t know what I would’ve done if you hadn’t shown up, I know I’m not that popular amongst the rest of the staff, so if it wasn’t for you I think I would’ve driven my self home. That, or crawl my way to your lounge like a leper.” (Y/N) looked down at the bowl, a little embarrassed at their genuineness.

“If I didn’t have snot running down my nose right now, I’d give you all kisses to show my thanks!” They grinned, trying to break the tension.

The men all had varying degrees of reaction, each of them shifting between flustered and disgust.

“Save the sap for later, kid. We’ll figure out how you can repay us tomorrow, as well as give you all the exhilarating details on how we got you here.” Hades ruffled (Y/N)s hair, ignoring their groans in protest.

“That’s right darling, just worry about breaking that fever. We’ll be here until you’re well again~” Jafar mused, giving a wave of his hand and turning towards (Y/N)s couch, planning on making the most of their extensive movie collection.

“Aye, especially since our schedules have been cleared! We might even have us a day for you to show us around! I’ve always wanted to see the beaches here…” Hook readjusted the covers on (Y/N)s body.

Hades and Hook left (Y/N)s side, going to join Jafar on the couch, leaving their attendant tucked into bed.

…

“Wait—what do you mean our schedules are cleared? WHAT DID YOU GUYS DO—!?”

————————————————————————

Yay!! This has been in the works for a while! I’ve been wanting to iron out the timeline of the Villains, and if they still had their powers after being brought to reality. I headcannon that Disney took away there powers, but after a while the Villains got them back.

I had Covid a month ago (The day I had to help my sister move), and when I was sick in bed all I wanted was to be doted on, so this is super self indulgent