#it is a hefty difference
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my favorite girlie :3
#kib art#artists on tumblr#digital artist#digital art#tptm#tptm fanart#the post traumatic manifesto#splitter girl#weevildoing#shes jus like me fr#eyestrain#eyestrain cw#dont mind that the bracelets are in a completely different art style#an absolutely hefty art file#worth it tbh#what if she had piercings huh#what if
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not to boast, but I think I am legit the keystone holding this entire group project together
#quil's unholy underworld#to be fair I did get named group leader#but all that means is i'm the one to submit everything#i have. however. also stepped up to bat. i am coordinating and messaging and making calls like wild#we've got a section due in 5 hours and i've sent 3 different emails requesting people do things#and telling them when i need it done by#and what we'll do if they don't get it done by then#and they're actually getting back to me and doing as I ask#we've got plan a and plan b#i'm explaining things i'm in contact the teacher on and off#i'm not the one doing all the work mind you#i'm just the one coordinating everyone doing the work#which is. also a hefty amount of work#but i am. quite good at it so far#any of you need your projects managed hit me up
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I will never get over how big his hands are. I am a size medium in gloves and I know he’s an XL and I just. Idk what to do w that information. Pls wrap those hands around my ankles and drag me to the edge of the bed and have ur way with me im so sorryyyyy
#I’m a size queen I think#bc I spend too much time thinking abt the size difference between us#I’m a hefty bitch but I’m short and have small limbs and such#nouhh
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i think all those autism vlogging youtube channels that post distressing videos of their children having meltdowns and intense panic attacks for thousands and thousands of people to see should be deleted and banned off the website and i am not kidding. i don't care what excuse they use whether it's "oh no it's for education purposes! so clearly posting our kids in state of extreme emotional and mental distress is okay 😊" or some other excuse, it's not okay to post your kids in what can be a very vulnerable and embarrassing state to be in for the whole internet to see. don't even come at me with that "they asked for the videos to be posted!" rubbish kids cannot consent to that no matter how intelligent or informed they are about the consequences of those videos going online. children cannot and should not consent to those videos going up and it pisses me off that the blatant exploitation of children and disabled people is still normalised and excused like this. cause that's what it is. it's exploitative of the vulnerable no matter how much it swears it's trying to be educational. 99% of the time the only reason these kinds of videos are online is to get clicks and views and money and it's disgusting.
#they are literally the exploitative family vlogging channels of the autistic community i hate them i hate them#yes this is specifically about the autism family channel#i legit hate that fuckin channel so so so so much#WHY are you posting your children having meltdowns and panic attacks and making their crying faces the fucking thumbnails#don't you fuckin tell me it's for education purposes. you KNOW what you're doing with those titles and thumbnails.#you're looking for people to click because ohhh look it's a disabled person!! and they're in extreme distress!!! how controversial!!!#also another thing that pisses me off is that this often never happens to neurotypical people#(which it shouldn't anyway but that's not the point)#but if people were going around recording their neurotypical kids crying people would be more upset about it#they would go ''hey that's not fucking ok to post your kids crying on youtube don't do that''. as they should#but the MOMENT it's an autistic child and the channel owner makes the typical ''its for education'' excuse#people are suddenly like ''omg i feel so bad for your and your kids thank you for posting this '' yadda yadda yadda#it's the same exact shit as the former it just has a different coat of paint#i refuse to believe anyone who willingly posts their kids in a highly distressed state that should be kept PRIVATE#to the whole fucking internet actually cares about educating people#we have seen this time and time again where kids in emotional distress were posted online#and the people posting them turned out to be exploiting their children for money and clicks#i genuinely believe this is the same exact situation happening here#if you need to film your kids crying for education so badly that should only be kept between you and a medical professional.#not posted on the damn internet while you zoom in on your child's distressed face in the thumbnail.#autistic people are not fucking zoo animals stop treating us like them#autism#autistic#ableism#disability#disability rights#it must be made illegal to post disabled people in states of distress and the consequence is an incredibly hefty fine#and the money goes to the disabled person who was illegally posted online
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Ash: *half jokingly says something abt commiting arson*
Sara: i am going to kill him, hes *actually* going to be a ghost this time
*fast forward several months and shenanigans later*
Roy *driving a modified scooter down the street*hey bestieeeee wanna go set fireworks on the neighbours who hate homeless people?
Sara: omg yea!!!!
*rides off into the sunset*
Ash *somehow there* : ??????? so do you just hate me SPECIFICALLY?????
#context:#for completely different reasons ; some shady organization hires both of them; mostly for recon stuff and puts them in the same area#both are aware they didnt have a choice and predisposed to hate everyone else in the organization; so while Ash reacts to this#with carefully calculated acts of rebellion; Sara just sorta wants to get everything over with#as warm as she is; she defaults to ´no nonsense´ in this situation#should be noted also that Ash was half putting up a persona#so their attitudes for coping end up clashing constantly; more stuff happens and they part ways#they meet later after a hefty amount of plot and character development and end up being sorta petty but overall chill w each other#it should be noted they only got paired up bc of the concept of ´parallels´... which is an entire thing in my worldbuilding#but theyre kinda tough to assign opposites as theyre both considered anomalies *shrug*#oc talk#oc: ashton#oc: sara#north mount#west coast
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throam take: im glad that the author never finished rewriting it into an original series cause can you imagine if it got popular on booktok or something
i both agree and disagree: yes, it would have been bonkers, but also, imagine the drama
#i wonder what the finished product would be like fr#i remember anna saying she condensed the trilogy down to just one hefty book and the snippets she posted were very different from throam#partly because she had an extra ten years of writing experience but still#for all we know she coulda written it tho. and released it under yet another pen name#depending on how thoroughly she reworked it we would never be able to tell#ask#throam#the heart rate of a mouse
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The range on a single roll of Fujifilm 200ISO 35mm film
#35mm film#nikon f60#Nikon n60#film photography#san antonio#Texas#film photographers#Fujifilm 200iso#that is not a film that handles dim light well and i don't exactly have a tripod that'll hold that chunky boi#my 40$ hefty lad weighs more than the 20$ tripod so small it fits in my knock off Dior bag you can take to fancy bars lmao#my coach office lady purse is my art laptop bag and my designer rep for nights out is for cameras#you can just cosplay being normal IRL and nobody realizes you're being a freak until you pull about the 3rd camera out in the same night tbh#then they start asking you stupid questions like why did you bring a camera older than us to a bar#what are you doing with that film camera do you take photos how many do you have and that#prompts that fantasy rogue character pulling more knives from different places in their clothes gag but for cheap cameras
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2023 reads
Winter’s Orbit
standalone space opera/romance
when his cousin dies, an imperial prince is rushed into marrying the widower - an ambassador from a planet they have a tenuous treaty with - to control rising political hostilities
neither thinks the other is happy with the circumstances, but they have to put on appearances for the public - and when they find out the death might have been murder and they’re implicated, they start to uncover a web of treason within the court and empire
arranged marriage, politcs, set on a wintery planet
#Winter’s Orbit#aroaessidhe 2023 reads#i enjoyed this a lot!#it’s not 100% for me and I think maybe it relied a little too much fanfic romance tropes at points but like. that’s not inherently bad#there were some things that i wanted more of like. jainan’s relationship with his sister?#we see them about to talk for the first time in 2 years but then don’t actually….see that talk?#or anything else between them til the end of the book. i was like hold on I get not seeing That scene but surely she's gonna come up again#asfkadjfh theres a survival bit in the middle which im like. survival 101 stay where you are!!!!! oh my god unfamiliar snowy landscape coul#be SO dangerous. if there’s a storm. whiteout!! also dangerous wildlife apparently???#the book does raise this and have valid counter arguments as far as the worldbuilding goes#(they’re in a blank spot of cell service which is rare so hard to find them) but akjdhsgkjsf i can’t help but be like. noo.....#but also space opera setting that’s on a very wintery planet - i feel like is not that common! i like that#definitely has a hefty amount of miscommunication but like….it’s the kind that’s because the characters come from such different#emotional contexts rather than silly reasons. i don’t mind that tbh. though they maybe could have talked about things a bit earlier
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This month's bonus book is super long and it seems the reason for that is because the author spends like a paragraph doing world-building or unnecessarily over-explaining reactions between each line of dialogue -_-
#i'm only 3% through so far so it may improve once we've done enough of the world-building#but if not then it's only a matter of time before i dnf it because it's already grating on me#it's like. i don't care about this side character's relationship with her parents please just get on with the story#also the author's ripped off norse mythology but not in like. a good or clever way.#she's literally just changed the name of things very slightly or used the names of things for entirely different concepts#and the main character is apparently from a 'small village called nidaros'#nidaros is the old name for trondheim y'all. she's from fucking trondheim. which isn't a small village and wasn't when it was nidaros eithe#but i'm pretty sure the city itself is supposed to be entirely fictional#it's certainly not set in medieval norway bc they have cell phones and stuff#anyway we'll see how long it keeps up and how much it tries my patience#but if it doesn't improve soon it's going in the bin (metaphorically speaking given it's an ebook)#bc it's a hefty-ass book and i'm not investing near on 20 hours into something i don't enjoy
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karen is MY special white woman. my problematic fave. because i understand why she sucks. i think in order to be allowed to be a karen fan you have to actually understand why she sucks. if you don't understand why she sucks then you're a bad karen fan i think.
#i think one of fhe reasons i dont like many of her fans and what made me feel :| about liking her at first is her many like.#unconditional supporters i think. and i get it. a lot of it comes from how misogynistic ppl are about her. but like. she also sucks mega bad#this is also mostly show fans. not many ppl are talking about her in a comic context. but it's like.#there is a difference from defending her from the very real misogyny against her VS defending her every move#the same way there is a big difference between critiquing her and analyzing her as a character vs straight up misogynist hate#but it's like. oughhhhh not enough of you get her. to be fair despite my jokes i know i cant claim to mega understand her either#but i think i give a lot more thought than some others do about her.#also all her wrongs are honest to god equivalent to many other male characters in this series in terms of ''''Bad Person''''.#but we get more of a focus on it bc she is the love interest.#but like. foggy is also deeply ableist to matt too. and rude as a friend to him for a long time.#and matt sucks so bad himself. and is /deeply/ misogynist for a long time in comics.#they all have their faults and when i think about that im like it really is no sin to like her. bc many other characters in terms of the#things people very validly crit about her. not many others of this cast are better!#and it's fine. bc it's who they are as people in their story. bc this is how real life often is and of course they will not hold the same#beliefs as you the real person who can often know better than them. due to also living in a very different time period from their creations#+ where most of these runs take place.#OKAY IM DONE TLDR I like karen! she sucks! but so does everyone else in this series! so i have let myself learn it is fine#but also. ohhhhh my beef with show karen. very different from my beef with comics karen. i have a lot of very specific beef with show karen#but also. a lot of that comes less from her as a character (MAJORITY OF THE TIME. DEFINITELY TIMES WHERE IT IS OF HER OWN AS A CHARACTER BUT#STILL IMPACTED BY) THE. HM. ATTITUDES OF THAT WRITING ROOM. THE VERY PISS POOR RACIST ATTITUDES OF THAT WRITING ROOM.#so trust me. trust me i doooooo understand the hate. but there is still a hefty majority of misogyny fueled hate about her instead of her#actual character flaws and the beliefs she has and holds and acts on.#but oh a karen lover who hates elektra in show well it makes me wish that blond woman would get laser shot.#but that is besides the point. point is i love comics karen and i think it's interesting to analyze and view her#my romance comic leading lady trapped in a cape comic<\3#static.soundz
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[wailing]
#the two most agonising things a human can experience: starting 2 new classes tomorrow AND having to write a sex scene#the history class shouldn't be THAT hard all things considered#but the japanese class looks to be pretty intense#its three sessions in person plus 2 online classes per week#which is like...8 and a half hours a week i think??#then i have another (slightly less intensive) japanese class to do as well but that one starts on wednesday#i only have 4 different modules this term but yeah that japanese one is pretty hefty#granted the sex scene is entirely my own doing so i can't REALLY complain#but god. every time i start one i remember how utterly excruciating the last one was and why i said i would never do it again 😭#this one also has the unique distinction of being solely composed of characters whose anatomy i can concretely define#which may not sound like much but its certainly different to how i normally write these things#(i.e. w characters whose anatomy is left up to the reader's interpretation)#so you know. Fun#[unimpressed portal 2 confetti sound]
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I am. Not dead. BUT will be gone for a like a day or few because the stuff at work did not! want! to! work!
Which I'd another way of saying that I finally was able to get free after working 34 consecutive hours in a row. The day prior I got 1 hour of sleep and that is all after 5 days of 10 or 11 hour work days.
I am so sleepy. I am taking tomorrow off and probably going to sleep right through it. Anywho cheers everyone!! I am going to go to the shadow realm now @:P
#syncrovoid.txt#delete later#maybe??#the one coworjer that has been helping as best he can is now calling me a cyborg haha! it is funny#but strange because before i was officially hired the supervisor (lead programmer) said i was#i was like a robot and if i had been perfect there'd be no difference#<- this was his notes when i finished my (payless) practicum there that lead to me being hired before graduating#ironically the new guy (hes been around half a year lol) was one of the only other people that graduated from my course#none of us ever met but it is cool!! and he did a lot to help out over this week of nonstop work#<- okay i KNOW someone will say “hey. you know you could have stopped right?”#but consider. i have very bad body awareness so i dont notice much impact from sleep deprivation and also i would feel so guilty @:(#and also consider!! i have either earned a hefty paycheck of the redt of the week off so like. capitalism yay?????#<- i do not support capitalism#ALSO sleep deprivation is SOOO silly because i get hyper! i feel like i get more and more energy and my brain doesnt stop thinking!#i have had a grand total of 3 hours of sleep in the past uhhh 4 days??#it is so silly!! but probably not good for me#but i CAN confirm to you that when websites say it takes 3 days of no sleep to start hallucinating they are exaggerating#it takes at least 5 or a week with only 1 or 2 hours sleep#even then it is so minor.#weirdest sleep deprivation hallucinations ive had was where every second time i blinked the world was overlayed with a different one#it has happened twice and it is literally and without exageration the STRANGEST feeling in the world. in the universe even#it is like you are flickering btween two realms that occupy the same physical space but from two different theoretical spaces#if that makes sense??#the first time it happened it was at a huge school sleep over and every few moments the gym full of sleeping bags and other peeps#would transform into all the chill monsters just living their life. like monsters in terms of not looking human nor like any earthly creatur#but not mentally monsters. it was like a towns square sort of thing? so they were rushing about and coming in and out the doors#second time it happened i was like 14 and in the back of an overstuffed car with a friend and their mom and we were in the middle of nowhere#forest for hours and hours longer still. slept on the side of the road lol. but it was like very so often huge huge giants would step over#the trees. all you could see was the somewhat woody-scaly texture of these massive massive poles or legs or whatever#slowly moving over the forest and walking around. looking up into the sky they just faded away too tall to see
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realising how much of my expansion beyond rock and metal into a wide range of genres is because:
Slipknot crossed over with the edgy/gothier end of 2000s hiphop
Disturbed are just like. The BIGGEST nerds for 80s British pop (they're not alone in that, it's a whole numetal Thing, but I think like a solid 10% of the 80s pop I listen to I first heard as a Disturbed cover)
Lady Gaga was the top 40 artist it was Okay For Edgy Alternative Teens To Like In 2007
Being an Alternative 2000s Teen was in many ways very musically stifling cause it was incumbent upon me to perform disdain for anything deemed too Pop.
I was somewhat rescued by my own gayness (when me and my gay goblin friends discovered CAMP!!!! and got semi-ironically big into Katy Perry and Rihanna and of course Gaga) but mostly I was so aggressively self-policing my music tastes and deciding what to listen to based more on my assessment of where it fitted socially than on whether I like. Liked it.
Catch 13 year old me studiously typing "punk" and "metal" into Limewire and listening to whatever came up. Catch 15 year old me assessing whether the fact that Rihanna is making music videos about murder in black lipstick means it's ok to like top 40 pop. Complicated by the fact that honestly half the biggest Alternative Teen bait acts of the 2000s were pop as hell, and that as above, numetal acts were nerdy musicians with a broad range of tastes outside metal, and it was very complicated for me. It probably took me until I was like 20 to really start to get a handle on what I personally liked musically, rather than what fit my persona (vividly remember being in a goth club when I was like 18 where they closed out the night with Leonard Cohen's Closing Time every time, and thinking like oh man am I allowed to like Leonard Cohen then? having been listening to Leonard Cohen since I was a literal infant.)
Once I let go of the sense of having to like the Right Music, I very rapidly developed very eclectic tastes and music became a really big part of my life. although my friend did recently still describe my music taste as "two genres - heavy and gay" so that 2000s alt teen is still in there big time.
I think it's a normal thing about being a kid. You're developing music taste basically from scratch and there's a world of music out there so it helps to start out with a narrow focus and build a solid few acts, albums or genres you really like and work out from there. But I do regret how much good music I missed out on first time around because even though I liked it I wrote it off for being rap or being too pop or too upbeat. But the good thing about music is that it doesn't go away! I'm still discovering a lot of music that I heard 50000 times when it was on the radio but never really listened to at the time. It's fun!
#red said#also i do think the fact that my family didn't really listen to music radio did change the ways i developed taste#it was talk radio or music my parents or us kids already owned so there wasn't like. a time i was listening to new music where#i wasn't also performing Teen Coolness for other kids. i mostly heard new music in the art room at school or in cafes or on coaches#whereas i know a lot of people who built their foundational music tastes really on from what was on the radio when they were kids#lot of people i know reminisce about hearing certain songs in the car to school etc and for me that's not music that's BBC Radio 4#idk i think it's really interesting that like. early developmental stage of music tastes#cause it's different for everyone. for most it's a patchwork of your family's music what your friends listen to and what's on the radio#as well as stuff you stumble on or seek out of of interest#and the balance is different for everyone. i think it says a lot about your experience of childhood#and i also think like for myself I'm often quite judgemental of child!me's basic and limited tastes#because i was pretty judgemental of myself at the time for not knowing Enough Music#and as an adult I'm like nah that's a pretty vital part of development. like you don't get mad at a baby for not knowing what words mean.#you have to start somewhere! when you're 14 you've only had 14 years to listen to music and for most of that time you weren't choosing it#and you probably haven't been going out to gigs or record stores off your own back. you're going with friends or family's recommendations#so like as a teen i knew my parent's music. i knew my brother's music. i read Kerrang! and listened to stuff my friends suggested#but it took time to build up that solid foundation to go 'what i like is a hefty beat/ bass and a lot of energy. i will find more of that.'
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while I don't have the capacity to respond to every single Spilled Ink response, I still do read them all and I gotta say I'm loving the discourse this second session is generating 😁
#I will chime in if I absolutely feel moved to#but I think I wrote a pretty hefty post contributing most of my thoughts on the matter#and that kinda tired me out lol but also I'll probably only speak up again if I feel like I have something meaningful to say#but I'm glad that the series is doing what it was made to do!!#I'm hoping w/ future sessions we will recruit more and more people to chime in that actually have experience with what's being discussed#(which again was part of the point! bringing together people of different backgrounds/experiences)
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Another Crab frien for Chris and pal for Breadcrust 😭🥺 @valour-bound
#i see crab I doodle crab#plus these fellas just come in different shapes and colors !#literally coconut crab and king crabs are hefty fellas !#sleepy on the radio occ#°°sleepy on the radio°°-ooc
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YGO Duel Disk rings from Duel Monsters and 5D’s for me and my friend lol
#I think the thing I appreciate w my friends is that I have different things associated with them#like each one of my friendships are fun and deep and so so different#and I appreciate that a lot#with that being said I should continue watching 5D’s since that’s Vix’s fave one HAHA#I think it’s cute that the duel disks are so similar too#yusei’s is an altered version of the first one so that makes sense but how cute HAHA#I should draw my old YGO oc just for old sake HAHA#also i was pleasantly surprised that these were HEFTY?? i thought it was plastic but it's actually metal??#i think i might join hun and his friends at the ygo regionals bc why not HAHA#x#shrekeii
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