#it is 7:30
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WASTE NOT (18+)
or, the reader is travelling with the Ghoul when he discovers she's never fucked before. You figure out what comes next.
cooper howard/the ghoul x reader | warnings/notes: loss of virginity, masturbation, exhibitionism, piv sex, oral sex, barely proofread | side note: i might end up reusing this general plot for a longer multi-chapter fic, we'll see
read on AO3
Five hundred caps, two hundred upfront.
That’s how much it took for you to get out of the gilded cage that was your hometown, a decent sized settlement inside of what used to be a Rodeo stadium and aptly named for it. That’s all it took for you to escape your father, the mayor of said town who kept you under lock and key, both literally and figuratively. You’d tried to escape before, attempts that had been thwarted before they even began. It only led to you being locked in your room and only allowed to walk the town with a bodyguard, someone hired to make sure you didn’t run for it.
Some people might say that it was a privilege to be cared for so much that you didn’t have to constantly fight for your life. You thought it was a surefire way to get you killed when you finally did leave his grasp.
Since running away, you’d done many things for the first time that most people did before they were even ten years old. Held a gun, caught your own food, killed a man.
And the man you’d paid to take you through the wastes was the first ghoul you’d ever met. Your settlement didn’t ban them from entering, but they weren’t exactly welcoming either. But you’d been immediately drawn to him, which you at first chalked up to the novelty of meeting a new kind of person, the kind you’d only read about.
However, as you’d continued traveling with him and the novelty wore off, you quickly realized that the draw you felt to him wasn’t just because of culture shock.
The Ghoul, which was the only thing you called him because he’d given you nothing else to call him, was sitting by the fire he’d built, a slow curl of smoke drifting from the cigarette hanging in his mouth. You looked over at him, observing how the light from the flames reflected off of his worn and imperfect skin. It was a sight you’d seen almost every night this week, but every time you felt like it was the first time you were seeing him.
Your week was almost up. When you’d hired him, you’d told him you only wanted to leave your town for a week, just to experience the Wastes before returning to your “ivory tower,” (his words, not yours). It had taken some bargaining on your end (and you had to give him chems in addition to the caps) but it had worked. You were out of the clutches of your father, you were finally experiencing life for the first time.
And you had no intention of going back when the week was over.
You were sitting across the room, perched on an old bed that was still standing in the half-ruined house, though shack might be more accurate. An entire wall was missing, letting you look right into the starry night sky from your seat. But mainly you were looking at the Ghoul, who was looking after one of his guns. You brought the drink you’d been nursing- just a Nuka-Cola you’d found on your journey and saved for this moment- taking a deep sip of the fizzy drink when he spoke up.
“Stop starin’ at me.”
You choked, sputtering up the Nuka-Cola in your attempt to catch your breath. In your coughing, you only managed to spill more of the drink on yourself, an unfortunate chain of events that left you with a soaked through shirt. You cursed under your breath, looking down at the brown liquid that would surely stain the fabric. Did you even have a clean replacement in your bag?
Leaning towards your bag, you placed the almost empty bottle on the floor before flipping the flap, peering inside.
“You might wanna take that off before the flies smell the sugar.”
Your current task forgotten, you stared up at the Ghoul, who wasn’t even looking at you when he said it. But the idea of taking your shirt off around him when you knew that he could see it was terrifying. However, he was right when he said you’d need to get the shirt off of your body soon and put it into your bag. Who knows how much sugar was in Nuka-Cola, how far its sweet scent would travel if it was out in the open. And you certainly didn’t want to attract any bugs your way.
Sitting up straight, you cleared your throat. Your fingers worried at the hem of your shirt.
“Could you turn around…” Your voice trailed off at the look on his face, a brief glance your way.
“It’s nothing I ain’t seen on other women.”
“Okay, but I’ve never-” You stopped yourself from finishing your sentence, realizing exactly what you were admitting, but the damage was already done. The Ghoul leaned forward and you tightened your grip around yourself, as if the shirt still being on your body would protect you from his judgment.
“You’ve never…?” The pregnant pause hung in the air between you, but you weren’t going to clarify. You didn’t move, which must have been enough of a confirmation for him because he whistled low in his mouth. “Why am I not surprised? You didn’t even know how to shoot a gun.”
As if shooting a gun naturally came before losing your virginity. (Maybe it did, you wouldn’t know).
“Can you stop?” You huffed, your face hot. “If I had wanted to, I would have.”
But it seemed that any of your attempts to get him to drop the subject wouldn’t work, because he was looking at you intensely, an unreadable look in his surprisingly human eyes. Not for the first time, you wondered what he looked like when he was human. You’d tried before, to imagine what it looked like when his skin was smooth and he had a nose and hair, but nothing seemed to match his demeanor as well as being a ghoul did.
“And why didn’t you want to?”
“I-” You swallowed nervously, your heartbeat in your throat choking you. “I didn’t see the point, not when my dad is probably going to marry me off to some geezer who can’t get it up anyway. And I don’t need your judgment about it.”
You were now trying to hold onto any semblance of dignity you had left. Pretending like you’d made a conscious choice to not lose your virginity instead of it being a result of your virtual imprisonment by your father. Like you hadn’t yearned for the touch of someone else. (And, of course, like you hadn’t yearned at all for him over the course of the past week.)
“Do you touch yourself, at least?”
You froze, looking across the room at him like he was a Deathclaw. He leaned forward, perching his elbows on his knees. Like he could smell your apprehension, or worse, your burgeoning arousal.
“Do you touch yourself?”
This isn't something you had talked about ever with anyone. But you couldn’t help answering him. “Y-yes.” If he looked surprised that you actually spoke, you couldn’t tell over your own embarrassment.
“Show me.” When you didn’t respond, still sitting there staring at him like he had grown two heads, he sat back in his seat again, his hat dipping low. “Or don’t. I’m not going to force-”
You cut him off before he could continue, suddenly not wanting this opportunity to pass you by. After all, you only had this last night with him and then you would go your separate ways. If you horribly embarrassed yourself, it would only be for tonight. “Okay.” You think that this is your biggest streak of surprising the Ghoul. But he recovered quickly, a sly grin sneaking onto his face.
“Take your shirt off first.”
Nodding, you slowly reached down to the hem of your shirt, trying and failing to will your hands to stop trembling. Then, quickly, you peeled the sticky fabric off of your skin. You were a bit annoyed that you had managed to spill so much onto the shirt- it was a nice shirt, a rare find on the surface. But it didn’t matter now, considering where it had led you.
You dropped your shirt onto the floor, unable to look at him as he surely looked at your chest.
Suddenly feeling bold from his gaze, you did more than just take off the glorified rag from your chest- you divested yourself of all of your clothes, placing them into a messy pile by the mattress. You were now exposed to the elements and to his gaze, heavy as he looked over your body. Once again, he didn’t betray any of the surprise he might have felt.
“Should I-”
“Lie down.”
You stared at him before you slowly lowered yourself, trying to keep your eyes on him. When you couldn’t anymore, you closed your eyes. If you couldn’t see him, it wouldn’t be nerve wracking to be watched. But even as you thought it, you could feel the heat of his gaze on you.
“Touch yourself.”
At his surprisingly gentle command, you exhaled shakily. Gently, you dragged your hand down your body, your breath quick. After a moment of teasing yourself, you pressed the pads of two fingers against your clit, rubbing a slow circle against the sensitive bundle of nerves.
Immediately, you sighed, relieving tension you didn’t know had been building. While you had masturbated every night at home, you certainly needed the relief it gave you after a week of stress and almost dying. You were surprisingly wet, though not enough to qualify as dripping. your fingers circled your clit, your hips sudden bucking slightly.
Across from you, the Ghoul groaned, and you tilted your head up, looking at him. His eyes were entirely focused on your cunt, watching the wet slide of your fingers over your folds. His teeth were clenched together, and you gasped at the sight of him watching you so intently before you bit your lip to muffle the sound. Then his eyes moved from your fingers, looking you straight in the eyes as he started to speak.
“I bet you touched yourself all quiet, trying not to let daddy hear you fucking yourself. But your daddy ain’t here, and I want to hear the noises you make.”
You whined, his words going straight to your cunt. What was more painful was that he was correct- many nights you’d bit your pillow as you’d fucked yourself with your fingers, trying to keep quiet.
“Go ahead, slip a finger inside-“
You stopped moving, looking at him again, taking the moment to catch your breath.
“I’ve never really done that-“
The Ghoul cursed, and before you could blink he was off of his chair, moving closer. He was now knelt in between your legs, his gloved hands on your knees and staring up at you.
“I gotta fuckin teach you everything, don’t I?”
Swiftly, he removed his gloves, throwing them onto the pile of your clothes. Then he swatted your hand away from your cunt before replacing it with his own fingers. At the dramatic shift in skin texture you gasped, immediately grinding against his rough fingers mindlessly as your hands flew to your mouth to muffle your cries.
“None of that, I told you I’m gonna hear the sounds you’re making ‘cause of me.”
He moved down your body, pressing kisses and delivering brief bites to your flesh. With each nip of his teeth you gasped, torn between the desire to push his head away or beg for more. Then he reached your sex, pausing for a moment and letting his warm breath fan over you. You squirmed, unsure if you wanted to beg him to touch you or if you wanted to run away from the sheer overwhelming intensity of it all.
Then his mouth was hot against you, his tongue licking a thick stripe up the length of your cunt, and you wondered why you’d ever thought about not letting him do this. With no nose in the way, he was able to press his face fully against you. He dipped his tongue into your opening, flicking it against your walls and thrusting a few times, the movement of his tongue in addition to his fingers overwhelming.
He groaned against you as he lapped up your wetness, sounds of a man dying of thirst reaching an oasis.
With a final wet sound, he removed his tongue before moving to suck on your clit, his hand moving from your thighs to return to your core.
“Fuck, you’re tight.” He murmured as he pressed two of his fingers inside of you. You’d tried before to fuck your self like this but always found the feeling unsatisfactory. But his fingers were larger than yours, able to hit the places inside of you that you had begun to think were myths.
It was overpowering, and any thoughts that weren’t about him quickly dissipated.
Every indent and ridge of his skin dragged along your cunt and the sensation of being filled combined with the attention he was giving to your clit started to build you towards your peak.
“Come for me, cmon.”
But even though you’d never come before at the hands of another, you knew what you wanted. You were afraid that if you came now, he wouldn’t actually fuck you. And if you were taken back to your rinky-dink town, you wanted to at least say you’d been fucked by someone you wanted.
“I want to feel you- hm- inside me.”
“You don’t know what you’re saying.” His teeth were gritted together again, like he was so entirely focused on making you come that he didn't want to hear anything else.
“Yes, I do.” You raised your hips to meet the thrust of his fingers. “I want your cock, I need you to fuck me-“
“Fuck.” He murmured, eyes lidded as whatever shaky resolve about actually fucking you he had broke. “For someone who never killed before this week, you’re dangerous.”
With swift movement, he pulled himself out of his pants and climbed up your body, pressing his hips against yours. He hovered above you, the head of his cock rested heavy on your clit, his hips rolling once to grind the length against your wet cunt.
“Please.” You murmured, raising your hips to meet his cock. He gave you a dark look, and if he had eyebrows you’re sure one of them would be raised as if to say ‘you ready?’
Then he started to press in, his thick head catching before he pushed through the tight ring of your opening. Your mouth was slack, eyebrows furrowed as you focused on relaxing for every inch that was slowly pressing into you. When you looked at him, he was entirely focused on watching his cock disappear into your wet heat.
He was slow, but you didn’t think it was due to any care for your comfort. No, from the look on his face, you would hazard a guess that he enjoyed slowly taking your virginity, feeling each inch of you give way to his thick cock. He liked the surrender.
When his hips finally nestled against yours, he rested for a moment, his breath heavy.
“Ready?”
Okay, maybe he cares slightly about your comfort- the thought was quickly erased when he pulled out and slammed back in, filling you quickly. You cursed, your hands flying to the bed to scramble for something to hold on to. But there were no sheets on the filthy mattress. So instead, you reached up to him, grasping the back of his duster for dear life as he began to fuck you in earnest.
He lowered himself as you wrapped your naked legs around his hips, bracing himself on his elbows above you.
“So fucking tight.” He murmured against your face. One of his hands slipped from where it was braced above you to circle around your clit, the pressure just enough to send you back towards your peak. “This cunt belongs to me now, y’hear?”
“Yes- fuck.” You babbled, and when he whispered against you to finally come, you did so with no hesitation. Your legs gripped him tighter against you, his thrusts shorter but more forceful with the constraint. With your cunt clenching around him as you sighed through the aftershocks of your orgasm, he removed his hand to suddenly grab your chin, looking you in the eyes.
“Where should I-“
“Inside me, inside me please.”
For a moment he looked like he was going to argue with you. But then you clenched down on his length again and his hips stuttered against you, a low groan escaping him. Reinvigorated, he began fucking you even harder, which had seemed impossible.
“Take it, take my cum like a good girl- that’s it-“ his words left him as he finally finished, his hips pumping as he cursed and spilled his warm spend inside you. You hummed at the feeling of it, the tiny thrusts as he pumped you full of him dragging his cock along your sensitive walls.
When he finally pulled out of you, watching as his cum dripped out of your opening, he looked back at your face with a sly smile.
“I hope you have some RadAway at home.”
____
The Ghoul didn’t bring you back into the city. He seemed to think you were experienced enough to handle the last hundred yards of desert without him. I’ll come back later for the rest of my caps, I have some business I need to deal with. Did you feel a little bad that you were cheating him out of three hundred caps? Yes. But you hadn’t thought this far when you’d paid him the first time, and now it was too late.
You barely said goodbye.
Once you were out of sight, you took off running in the opposite direction, only looking behind you once to make sure no one was watching or worse, following.
You were free.
____
Well, you were free for about two days.
Then, one evening, you sheltered yourself in an abandoned house. Two stories, though you only peeked in the upper story to see if there was anything worth grabbing. You didn’t want to risk the floor falling out from under your feet.
A noise in the doorway draws your attention upwards, to where the Ghoul stands, silhouetted in the setting sun, like he had just left for a second, not for days.
You’re allowed a split moment of happiness at the sight of the familiar figure before you recognize what's in his hands. You barely have a second to try and escape before, like a flash, he whips the lasso around your torso, drawing it tight and pulling you closer as you struggled against the rope. But it held fast, and with every passing second you were losing ground. Finally the pressure of the rope was too much and you collapsed to the ground, the sun bearing down in your eyes until a shadow fell over your face.
“Y’know, when I went back to your little… Rod-e-o to collect on the final portion of my payment, I really expected to see you there. Tellin’ people you regret ever leaving. Maybe I’d have to rough you up a bit for the caps, though I’m sure you’d enjoy that. So imagine my surprise when I find out your father has put up a reward for whoever finds ya and brings ya back.” He laughed, a cruel and humorless thing. “I’ll get paid for takin’ you out and takin’ you in. And the word around town is that there’s a man there willin’ to take you off your father’s hands.”
His last words made your stomach sink, more than anything else he had said. It was something your father had threatened, even if he hadn’t meant it as a threat. Maybe he thought it was your dream to marry and have children. But you knew that whatever man he picked for you to marry would be powerful, powerful enough to ensure that your father would remain in office until he died.
And powerful men were cruel.
“No-” You gasped out, suddenly out of breath.
“Ah-ah-ah.” The Ghoul tuts softly, leaning down. “D’ya really think a week is enough experience to survive out here?”
“I won’t go back.” You spit, renewing your struggle against the rope. “You can’t make me.”
If you were a complete idiot, you’d say: I’d rather die than go back. Because while, in spirit, it was true, you knew that he would take your word for it. And you really didn’t want to tempt him to put a bullet through your brain.
You may have fucked him, but you certainly weren’t anything special to him.
“You don’t have much of a choice, sweetheart.”
“He wants to marry me off!” You said, like saying it indignantly would change his mind about taking you in as a bounty. “I refuse.”
“And what’ll you do when I drag you back?”
Find a way to escape again, even if it takes years.
Like he read the answer in your eyes, he stood up straight.
“I sympathize, I really do-” You sincerely doubted it, but let him keep talking, “but unless you’ve got something better to offer me, I’m afraid you’re going in.”
“How many caps is he offering you?”
“600.”
“I have more saved.” You laughed, though it lacked any actual humor. “Every cap he gave me for years, I’ve squirreled away. Not letting me leave my room really helped me save money.”
“And how, exactly, are you going to get to your stash without your daddy finding you?”
You tried to find kindness in his words and were surprised when you did. Though he may not have meant it, he had already given you a perfect out the night before.
“No self-respecting man is going to want to marry a woman who fucked a ghoul. And no mayor will tolerate his daughter making a fool of him like that.”
For a moment, you think he takes offense to this. But then a smile creeps across his face, hot and hungry.
“Well then, I think we can come to an agreement.”
#don't let this flop#cooper howard#cooper howard x reader#cooper howard x you#the ghoul#the ghoul x reader#the ghoul x you#fallout#fallout series#fallout fanfic#reader insert#my writing#lemon#it is 7:30
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bring back zooterkins, the best 17th-century swear word
I don't normally do Just Characters Swearing, but. ...this kind of wrote itself and then wouldn't leave my head. it comes from both a piece of character-writing advice that has always stuck with me, and also my conviction that Leona is 1000% funnier as a character if his dialogue has to stay G-rated. let Kalim say fuck, but don't let Leona say bastard.
(I'm sorry)
#art#twisted wonderland#(sort of atemporally somewhere between episodes 6 and 7?)#(i - i wanted that lilia joke okay)#long post#tumblr went 'you can post up to 30 images now :)' and i was like well okay then#anyway once again i'm sorry#i'd say i don't know why i did this but actually it is because i wanted kalim to scandalize everyone#i tried to keep it...you know...tasteful. a tasteful amount of fucks.#hey remember how the framing premise for the original birthday interviews was that yuu worked for the school paper#because i have never forgotten. in my head they are still getting up to all kinds of wacky reporting hijinks.
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Accessibility tip:
If you want to automate your home a bit, but you don't want any "smart" tech, you can just buy remote controlled power sockets instead
They are a lot cheaper and easier to set up and use than some home automation smart tech nonsense
They don't need an app (but some models come with optional apps and there are apps that are compatible with most of these)
Many of them use the 433mhz frequency to communicate, which makes most models compatible with each other, even if they are from different manufacturers
The tech has been around for a long time and will be around for a long time to come
You don't have to put any fucking corporate listening devices like an amazon echo in your home
Models for outdoors exist as well
#accessibility#automation#tech#a set like the one pictured above usually costs around $20-$30#I got like 7 of these bad boys and 3 remotes#I can control basically everything in my room with these remotes#I got one remote on my office chair one on my nightstand and one by my door#this always makes me feel a bit like I am in Arnold's room from Hey Arnold!
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cub is transgender. scar is just scar
#hi i started this comic like 7 months ago and forgot abt it and just found it again and finished it in like 30 minutes because i needed to#inflict this on everyone else#cubfan135#goodtimeswithscar#art#hermitcrap#mcyt#hermitcraft#convex
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GOOD OMENS (2019 - )
1.04 - 2.06
#good omens spoilers#good omens 2#good omens#goodomensedit#byaurore#userpayton#david tennant#michael sheen#tuserpris#tusercora#tuserrobin#tuserrachel#tuserhan#userzo#usergiu#usersaoirse#noalook#usertom#it's 7:30 am i don't even know my own name anymore
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Maysozoic #11: Irritator challengeri
#maysozoic#Paleoart#paleoblr#dinosaurs#irritator#procreate#digital#sorry for meme I can’t help it#this was supposed to post just now but the queue fucked it up? anyways double 7:30 dinosaur
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I feel like Phil deserves more credit for keeping us alive during the drought (2020-2022) like, now we have the gaming channel and a whole phour it is easy to just forget when Dan was a fun surprise guest that popped up sometimes.
I don't think I could take another Hiatus, we've been spoiled.
#also Phil's Solo content is so good#like really#mans just doung his own little thing#i respect it so much#dan and phil#dnp#phan#phil lester#daniel howell#dan howell#dan and phil games#amazingphil#danandphil#edit: ju-30-7:40 pm: thanks for all the noted but also what the phuck (♡)#*notes
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Kuhli loach posing on the tank thermometer.
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thorns and all
#rose#illustration#artists on tumblr#blood#cw blood#two blood#just in case?#eye strain#?#goodnight#(says goodnight at 7:30 am)
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-The first to fall-
Spoilers for Secret Life session 9 Etho’s POV
Cw: blood
#etho cant catch a break#i made a 30 sec clip into 7 page comic :)#scar and his savage quotes#art#fanart#mcyt#ethoslab#etho fanart#grian#grian fanart#zombiecleo#secret life#secret life roomies#trafficblr#hermitcraft#traffic smp#secret life spoilers#the roomies#secret life comic
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ARE WE STILL FRIENDS?
#op#one piece#luffy#usopp#lusopp#my art#currently rewatching water 7 saga and. GAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH#theyre sickening#i struggled a bit w luffy to find a good balance between his canon design and my interpretation of it#but i think i found it enough#guuys please watch the edit i linked it forever changed the trajectory of my life#i stream it daily#i watch it up to 30 times before i go to bed at night#and then when i wake up in the mornign I watch it at least 15 times before my classes begin.#and then i watch it while e
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Usopp said “I want a divorce!” and Luffy said “Fine! But I’m taking the kids!” and the kids were three teens older than him, a reindeer, and a 30 year old woman who was actively committing a political assassination
#like yeah sometimes your kids are three teens older than both yourself and your spouse a reindeer and a 30 year old woman who was actively c#one piece#water 7#you thought i was done with the usopp brainrot but no i was just on vacation#Elbaf cant come any sooner im chewing on the drywall and thinking about water 7#water seveeeeeen#I’m gonna have to go read fanfiction abt this#lusopp#strawhat pirates#monkey d. luffy#god usopp#my post
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25 today
#today was gooood I woke up at 5 bc banjo was barking and then got cozy in bed with Winston and watched dinner in America while working on#an art project untilllll like 7:30 then showered and got ready for workkkkk - ran lab all morning and one of the students brought me a gift#got more work done on my pieceee then taught class which was actually chiller in comparison to how it normally is . which was still pretty#hectic. but my mood was good :-)#and Alex sent me flowers to be delivered during class 😭😭😭😭#just got home and am going to go to the gym before getting dinner with my love 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼#and ******** ***#hehehe
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merlin was just a boy by the way. he was just a boy and all of that happened to him. just so u know.
#merlin#merlin bbc#rewatching it again !#let me introduce u to my tradition of rewatching merlin twice a year every february and july/august#ive been following that tradition for 6 years ? something like that#and couting from when i was 7-8 when i had no sense of time n would rewatch shows evry other week lets just say ive seen it like 30+ times#got the gay magic boy show fixation instead of math or physics fixation i am so lucky
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