#it gives the same vibes as people who judge young gay people for being really open about their identity and wearing pride flags and stuff

[alexhasalotofthoughts]

One time I suggested watching Dan and Phil Games to someone because I genuinely thought they would like it and they told me they wouldn't ever watch dnpg because they don't want to be "one of those gays."

The blatant homophobia in that sentence??? And that was clearly a jab at me?? Ugh.

Pls just let me live my life, thanks xxx

[reidsmissmatchedsocks]

sexuality headcanons for the bau!!

hotch - this man screams bisexual to me and i dont even know why. he just gives off the vibe. i feel like he has a preference for women but still very much loves men. emily was the first person he came out to (gideon had known but he found out on accident when hotch forgot to change the pronouns while talking abt an ex) since he knew he could trust her with that sort of thing after she came out to the team. shortly after haley died he decided he was tired of hiding this part of himself and came out to the rest of the bau, starting w rossi and then telling reid, morgan, garcia and jj at the same time. they were all very supportive and garcia gave him a little bi pride flag for his desk :)

emily - gayest bitch in the whole show. this woman takes wlw simping to a whole new level w the yearning shes been doing for jj for the last decade. she came out to the team very randomly while they were out at a bar. she slapped her hand on the table and said loudly, “id just like u all to know im a homosexual” and then walked out. everyone was kinda dumbfounded at first but obviously very supportive and happy she felt comfortable enough to tell them. she goes to pride every year and owns a lot of lesbian pride flags. morgan always laughs at her and teases her whenever he sees her obviously checking out someone and is happy he has someone to comfortably talk to abt girls. she gives the guys dating advice claiming shes “the master of dating women” even tho it took her over ten years to build up the courage to ask out jj. rossi finds this fact very funny

garcia - this woman is pan and u cannot tell me otherwise. fuck gender she loves everyone and is only interested in a persons amazing personality (since she prides herself on her ability to judge character) and how willing they are to flirt in public and how much they enjoy pda. garcia never really felt the need to come out assuming everyone just knew already but after emily came out she decided to keep a set of pride flags in her office and she has a pan flag on one of the walls plus an array of different pan themed things. one day rossi asked what the flag was for and she went in detail explaining different sexualities, flags and the significance. she finds the history super interesting and loves going to pride. she also wheres a little pan pride button on her shirts everyday because she thinks it looks nice :D

morgan - bisexual man. do i have to say any more? he never really came out but after seeing him flirt w enough guys while they were out everyone got the point. has a mini pride flag on his desk he got from garcia and a matching flag pin he wears on his shirts most days. he goes to pride w garcia and spencer every year

rossi - unlabled!! hes mostly had relationships w women but that doesnt mean exclusively. he likes men sometimes and has had relationships w them in the past but hes not quite sure which label fits him and thats okay!! hes never specifically stated his preference or sexuality to any of the others but they wouldnt be surprised if he got a bf, moreso surprised he got into a relationship at all

reid - biromantic demisexual!!! it took reid a long time to figure himself out, getting bullied a lot through school w various slurs thrown at him every day not helping. once he was in college he started to realize his attraction to both men and women and it scared him. he also felt like he was wrong for not wanting hookups or flings, he couldn’t understand the appeal. he pushed away a lot of his feelings, too scared of judgement from other people. that changed when he got to the bau tho, he had a family who loved and. supported him and he started to realize maybe it wasnt just him who felt this way. he ended up opening up to garcia after finding out shes pan and she lets him no they love him no matter what and theres nothing wrong w him. she helps him explore labels until he figures out which ones fit and gives him advice on coming out. he comes out to morgan first, hotch soon after, then emily, jj and rossi. they all are super supportive and loving ofc and reassure him that nothing can change their feelings towards him. theyre family.

jj - jj is bisexual!! she is obviously in love w emily but she also was in love w will for a long time. she never came out to the team officially but they all knew and she kept small bi pride things around her office. shes generally less of a gay mess than the rest of them but she definitely has her moments. she goes to pride every couple years w emily and sometimes hotch if they can convince him to tag along. she figured it out at a young age and never rlly doubted her feelings, just being happy w herself. she loves herself and her identity

[viktorhargreves]

some thoughts i have on the s2 promo stills

I think Ben is appearing either in a dream or to someone other than Klaus. The reason I believe this is the color composition for the shot and the framing. The Umbrella Academy is a dark show. Literally. And the season two promo pictures are no different from season one. Why the sudden departure from this? Promotional photos directly from the source (i.e. the production department) usually are not put through filters so this is how it will be shown in the show. So why the brightness? I think it’s either a dream or revelation (you know the cheesy trope where the sunlight streams in and someone finally pieces things together) or maybe it’s a vision that someone has of Ben. Contenders for this? No idea. But judging from the body that’s strung up on the ceiling (yeah, I didn’t forget that part) it could be Vanya. Or I could be totally wrong. Either way, the body does hint towards Klaus’ telekinesis, something he has in the comics that we have yet to see in the show (besides the suitcase debacle). 

We know that Five is the last to be sent to the 60′s so if he’s stuck in a new time with no one around what does he do? Find a mannequin and make a new friend (or something more). Maybe what we are seeing is him about to home-wreck this bitch and steal little miss blue-dress here. Or maybe he’s looking back at a different character... the villains of this season perhaps? Or maybe The Handler makes a comeback? Either way, he looks cautious and if he is looking at someone less than savory then the set up we see could be set up to mock him rather than a harmless department store display.

The paper reads: “S.J.C.C. asks... Have you experienced DISCRIMINATION by your employeer?” Not much comes up in Google for a look into who S.J.C.C. could be but I personally am SYKED to see The Umbrella Academy hopefully tackle race issues. Especially at this time in the world, it could be what people need. Also a new hairstyle for Allison which I love. I personally hope Allison is thriving but this is the 60′s and even though The Civil Rights Act was signed in ‘64, there was no across-the-board stop of segregation at once. I hope for her sake she stays safe.

Again, we know that Five is the last one to arrive. Perhaps he gathers them all to this place to tell them about the newest apocalyptic event about to take place. But a barn? Not sure why. Everyone else is dressed in back, however, even Klaus which is very telling that something is wrong. Allison has lost the hair bump (she was probably just wearing it to fit in). Luther has a beard which is very telling as well because the only other time that we have seen him with one is when he woke up from his surgery (supposedly after a long period of time) so if it was in his control he would shave it off to be the good little soldier that dad made him. Maybe being stranded in Texas in the 60′s made him depressed like we saw towards the end of season one or maybe he just wants to live a little. Diego’s outfit looks very similar to his vigilante outfit in season one but with what looks like either shoulder pads or a hoodie. This could be one of two things: he is still a vigilante using his powers for good, or he works a job like construction or something similar judging by the cross-chest harness. And Vanya. Look’s like she’s wearing a suit jacket. Peak gay. No further comment. 

GOOD GOD!!!  What to say, what to say. As it’s been pointed out already by many other users, Ben. Is. Holding. Keys. That means he is corporeal and has a physical body. Whether this is for a short period of time like when he punches Klaus in season one or if this marks the beginning of a new era of Ben-filled The Umbrella Academy is unknown. Klaus is a fashion icon. That much we been knew. Although, his beard is longer than the promo pictures despite being in the same outfit. Longer than the picture above too. I’m excited for this scene regardless of what it is about, but if I had to guess: Klaus is motioning for Ben to give the keys to him. The car broke down. Klaus gets out and tries to fix it by popping the hood, only he knows nothing about cars. He gets angry and throws the keys. Ben catches them. Klaus is then irritated and asks for them back. That’s just my take. Klaus looks like he’s smiling but it could be the natural face a person makes when they are squinting from the sun (this is Texas and those are sunglasses (also water is wet)).

#justgirlythings. Vanya is the only one who seems uncomfortable, also where are Klaus’s shoes? If you look in the background it appears this isn’t a salon as you would guess on the first look but rather someone’s house. Maybe this is a way to time travel without Five? Or some other sci-fi device like the shoot that Cha-Cha and Hazel used in season one to get their orders. Either way, there is a lot more going on here than we know from first looking and I wouldn’t put it past anyone that this is an important still to remember and keep in mind.

Iron Man references aside (thank you Justin Min), look at her entire body posture and language. Clenched jaw, clenched fists, forehead straining, eyes closed but not clenched like the others, neck straining. Vanya appears to be in the middle of nowhere so maybe she’s testing her powers? Last time we saw her testing her powers it was in the middle of the woods with Leonard so maybe this will be a good parallel. What else to do in the 60′s when you’re stranded than to try out your superpowers that you just remembered a few days ago?

Vanya! Is! Happy! She is definitely smiling and looks genuinely more happy than she did with Leonard in any event. The blonde woman is Marin Ireland who plays a character “Sissy”. Variety and Netflix have stated that Sissy is "a fearless, no-nonsense mom from Texas who married young for all the wrong reasons". Maybe, and I’m just spit-balling here, she married young because of internalized and outward homophobia that is probably rampant in the 60′s and in Texas. She meets Vanya and the two begin a relationship. Friends? Lovers? More? Vanya’s right hand is either on a gear shift (manual transmission i.e. stick shift cars were much more common in the 60′s than now) or on Sissy’s knee. I like the idea of her resting her hand on Sissy’s thigh and smiling, maybe driving off on a new life together. 

Like. The Gang’s all here, Scoob. Even Ben! Allison is talking, it seems so to have Ben in the shot is odd. Usually Ben only appears when Klaus is the main character of the shot or the scene since he can only see him. Except, maybe everyone can see him!! Klaus can summon Ben as seen in the season one finale so maybe he was able to do it for a longer amount of time. I personally really hope that we see more of Ben (which the stills lead me to believe) and that they will develop not only his character and backstory more but his powers as well. His power rivals only Vanya’s is sheer amount of destruction it can cause. The room, however, where they all are looks unassuming. It could be where Five has taken up a residence, could be a house of one of the other siblings (we know that some of them did in fact settle down and start lives in Texas), or maybe it’s just a safe place to meet as a team. Either way I am psyched!

It’s safe to assume that these are the assassins. Whether they are with the organization that The Handler was with is unclear. What is clear is that I get Stranger Things vibes from these guys. It might be the white hair and dark, cloudy road. Either way, these guys are played by Tom Sinclair, Kris Holden-Ried, and Jason Bryden left to right and they play Oscar, Axel, and Otto respectively. 

Diego, Diego, Diego. My son. Disregarding the long hair and beard completely because I refuse to acknowledge it at this point, here is my interpretation of the scene. This is a flashback in the same fashion that we had a Diego flashback in episode three of season one. That flashback had Grace helping Diego through a stutter and then in one camera motion showed current-day Diego sitting on his old bed. This could be the same kind of thing, with current-day Diego sitting where he past self was and watching a scene unfold around him. Why else would he be in his uniform? How could it fit? How could he be back in the mansion?

-----------

That’s all I have to say about it for now but my ask box is OPEN for theories, possible explanations, or hypotheses on season two or any of the promotional stills. Time travel is messy. Let’s see what happens on July 31st.

[mrs-nate-humphrey]

here’s a thought: if the show had been less cowardly and went forward with incorporating dan’s bisexuality from the novels into the show’s canon, how and when do you think it should have been done? what kind of storyline would you ideally want for him?

hi!! as you can imagine, i was delighted to receive an ask of this nature, and i started writing an answer for this, and then tumblr randomly shut its tab and ate it (biphobia!) so i’m trying again. uhh the short answer is that there was ample opportunity in canon – this post i made about dan dating everyone in the njbc, while sadly a joke, is based entirely on canon situations & dynamics. 

[ more under the cut ]

that post i linked is quite a bit even as is but there are more things in canon that lend themselves to dan being bi which i didn’t think of while making that post, such as:

the thing with chuck, when he was trying to get that story in season 2. it was very fade to black, which means anything could have happened.

dan making nate’s character in inside gay!! like, this was played off as a ‘haha funny’ by everyone, but characters in inside are…. recognisable. blair realised dan loves her for her through an extract from the book. everyone in dan’s life was pissed off with him because they could recognise themselves in the book. why would dan even make nate gay? what purpose does that serve? is it heterosexual to look at your dude best friend and go “damn, i wish he was gay”? nope! (here's a little more on why i choose to interpret it this way, despite the whole nate & eric being one character fusion thing.)

remember that bit in s2 that all of us dairs keep yelling about, where dan gives blair advice on how to seduce chuck? why was blair taking dan’s help on how to get the guy?? what made dan a suitable candidate for this sort of seduction? what made serena –  dan’s literal ex gf – suggest dan for this job? this makes so much more sense if he were bi, seriously.

him thinking of nate & serena having sex at the shepard wedding in graphic detail. i made this meme because, lmao, dan, what are you doing! but seriously – that didn’t feel very heterosexual to me, at all. i know the vibe was supposed to be ‘dan comparing himself to nate’ but the vibe was… not that, lmao.

things i would do beyond this / the direction i would get canon to take:

i think dan would know he liked boys as young as like, 13 or 14, but i think he would repress it and keep it to himself and not talk about it. vanessa would have her suspicions, possibly, but she would never bring it up.

i’ve written this in a fic or two before, but i headcanon dan’s first crush on someone in school to be on nate and not on serena. he meets serena at that party in ninth grade, but i’m assuming that he has classes with nate all the time at school, more than with serena simply because of the way constance/ st. jude is divided.

i think dan would have a lot of internalized biphobia to work through. i don’t think he would initially be happy or comfortable with knowing he likes boys, and he would try to ignore it. dan’s already very much a loner, ostracized by his peers, made to feel different and weird, and to him this would be one more thing that sets him apart from his classmates and makes him different from them.

so, given this, i think dan would be afraid of / highly uncomfortable with the possibility of becoming a stereotype. like “of course dan likes men, he likes to read poetry and watch romantic movies” or “of course dan likes men, he’s so well-informed on fashion” –  i think dan would find that sort of thing uncomfortable and reductive, but in true dan humphrey fashion, i think he would be judging himself more than anybody else is.

this sounds so cliché, but i think dan having a gay arc in college would be best for him. esp given his popularity at NYU, i think that’d do wonders for his self-confidence in general – knowing that he’s found ‘his people’ and that people like his writing and like him, just for who he is.

he would kiss a boy at some party, and the world wouldn’t end, and the boy would give dan his number, and dan… would still be too shy to call but it’d be a life-changing moment of… oh. i can have relationships with boys and still be dan humphrey. this doesn’t change anything about me. okay.

once he’s had that revelation, of course, it gets a lot easier. i’d want dan to have his first serious boyfriend in college. probably not anybody he knows from high school, someone new – an olivia type of person, basically, but a man.

he could still end up with blair, or get to raise milo with nate – i like both nate & blair as potential romantic endgames for dan. blair gets him in a way that nobody else really does, which is fun to watch on the show and very sweet to envision for dan. at the same time, there’s an easiness to the way he is with nate, like, their friendship is so low-pressure and solid and i think that’d translate nicely into a relationship, despite lack of similar interests.

i would like dan to make queer friends at college! i would love that for him. i’d like him to have friends who drag him into gay bars, i’d like for vanessa to realise she’s bi in college (vanlivia always had better chemistry than danlivia, this is the hill i will die on), i’d like dan to finally get to a point where he’s comfortable enough with his sexuality that even if randoms go “of course he likes men, he likes poetry and he likes fashion” he’d just be like, “fuck off, i like men because i like men, not because of the other things,” and he would… not care what people said, basically.

there’s probably more, but this is all i have for now! bonus: here’s a margottenenbaum S3 au fic where instead of serena who has the affair with tripp, it’s dan who does that? it’s a really interesting fic – the dynamic is so different, and it’s in tripp pov, which is kind of a rarity, at least, from what i’ve seen.

if for some reason you want more thoughts from me on bisexual dan beyond this, here’s an iconic conversation @blairwaldorfisgay & i had which started out with nate x dan & somehow ended up at chuck x dan. to this day, i have No idea how that happened, lmao.

[vivalavi-daa]

Fav 2019 K-Dramas

2019 blessed us with many intriguing kdramas with unique stories, don’t you think? I’m bored during quarantine and decided to post this. Anyways, here are my favs:

1. Vagabond

There, this picture says it all: this drama is fast paced, SO intense, and on fire. I love every minute of it! Vagabond is different than another k-dramas. I’m not lying when I say this drama literally makes me cry and scream. Sometimes I even had to pause in the middle of episode just to catch my breath lol. The plot is so well written and full of unpredictable storylines (which is what I love the most about Vagabond–that every episode always has a way to surprises me). Although, many viewers disappointed with how they ended Vagabond with a cliffhanger. I, too, really hope they consider making the second season to satisfy our curiosities. But either way, I don’t regret watching this drama. Not at all. Because this drama is too amazing

2. When the Camellia Blooms

Unlike majority of romance k-dramas, this drama’s love story is centered around a young woman who raises her child on her own. I gotta say, this is one high quality k-drama. I could even judge it from its lovely opening video. Every episode always has meaningful messages behind it. The storylines are rich and presented in such a way that makes viewers immersed in the stories and emphatize with the characters. First, they make us understand Dongbaek’s dark past and her struggle as a single parent, then they make us emphatize with Dongbaek’s son who grow up without a dad figure. We also get to see the perspectives of her mom & Yong Sik (the lead guy)’s mom as mothers,  the issues faced by side characters, and conflicts that arise from triangle love story. In addition, they also involved mistery of murderer in the stories! Can you believe how many of these can we swallow in one drama? One time this drama is heartbreaking, then it’s heartwarming, another time it gets super dark. 

Also, what I find many viewers love from this drama is how Yong Sik cherishes Dongbaek and love her for what she is, which is why I concluded this drama is perfect for woman who feels insecure. Why? Because with the way Yong Sik endlessly convinces Dongbaek, he reminds us that every woman is good enough, deserves to feel loved and receive happiness. And I love him for that.

3. Her Private Life

There is a reason why people said this is the perfect kdrama for fangirl, since the story is told from the perspective of a die hard fan (Sung Deok Mi). Those who have experienced being fangirls know how well this drama represent fangirls’ life: what fangirls do, and how fangirling affects our lives. It’s all displayed in such fun atmosphere that it’d give you good feelings while watching it. Personally, I am attracted to its opening video. It’s really catchy and reflect the fun vibes of Her Private Life. I really recommend this drama if you want to lift your mood.

But on top of that, Sung Deok Mi’s relationship with Ryan Gold is the major part of why I highly appreciate this drama!! Their relationship is unlike any relationship I’ve ever seen before. They’re very mature, respect each others’ dreams and what each other loves, always resolve conflicts through discussion. They portray the definition of a healthy relationship and I really admire that.

4.  Extraordinary You

The word extraordinary isn’t used in the title for no reasons. The storylines are, indeed, extraordinary. It is a mix of comedy, high school romance, star crossed soulmates, fantasy, mistery, comedy and a glimpse of stories in historical settings at the same time. Thus, it’s not exaggerating when fans said “you don’t have to look for specific dramas, you can get it all here”.

The actors & actresses’ acting skills are superb and we can find so many funny & relatable lines here. But one of the best things about Extraordinary You is they place the second leads in the center of spotlight! Finally nice second leads get the justice they deserve. They portrayed how lead guy who’s rude and feels entitled to have his crush doesn’t have the slightest chance of capturing the woman’s heart. Instead, the nice second leads who show respects and always put the woman’s desire before his own are what woman find attractive. I highly praise this drama for that.

5. Crash Landing on You

In 2019, we encounter many dramas with unique synopsis, including this one: a relationship between a North guy and a South woman. I have no doubt in Son Ye Jin and Hyun Bin’s chemistry since the beginning. Their incredible chemisty makes every romance scenes look even more sweet and pure and sometimes cute. Although I wasn’t really engaged with the first two episodes, the next episodes gets more appealing and satisfying. It’s nice to see the progress of both lead characters’ development and how they help each other overcome their issues. Aside from Se Ri (Son Ye Jin)’s relationship with Jeong Hyeok (Hyun Bin), her relationship with the North soldiers and neighboors at millitary village are pretty adorable. Their interaction always give me warm fuzzy feelings and they’re what I miss the most from this drama honestly.

6. One Spring Night

If you love Something in the Rain, I’m sure you’ll love this one too since both are the works from the same director. It has similiar atmospheres and similiar soundtracks vibes (both have really beautiful soundtracks by the way). Like Dongbaek from When the Camellia Blooms, the lead guy in this drama (Yoo Ji Ho) is also a single parent. I agree with fans saying this isn’t the kind of drama for everyone. This is more like slice of life and they aren’t in a rush to throw in conflicts as well as its resolution and I love it that way. Through this, they made it possible for us to process our emotions while the conflicts are presented.

The stories are also realistic: the issue experienced by the lead guy as a single parent, issue that’s arised from triangle love story, how pride and status mean for men, also a glimpse of abusive relationship, and the heartwarming sisterhood. And if we look closely, we could see how they tried to portray the influence of culture in the family and in the way they resolve a conflict. 

7. Catch the Ghost

I thought the ghost from the title refers to an actual ghost but thank god it’s not. Here, ghost is a nickname for a criminal–the villain of the drama. Even when the story centered around the same villain from the firat until the last eps, but I wasn’t bored at all watching this. In fact, it is what made me engage with the stories and made me continue watching the next eps although I had assignments to do 😅. It’s just so, so exciting to watch. The stories are dark, sad, but funny at times. However, some viewers (including me) found the lead woman (Yoo Reung) annoying at first because of her selfishness. But I promise it’s still worth to watch because in the later eps, you’ll understand why she is the way she is which makes it easier to tolerate and even emphatize with her. She’s actually lovable, and her relationship with the lead guy (Ko Ji Seok) is really cute! In fact, Ko Ji Seok is one of my fav characters in kdrama land!

8. Class of Lies

You know, I always love kdramas with unpredictable storylines. Just like what this drama has. I know the settings are set in high school but it is waaay too dark for a high school story. You can even see it from the picture that it has gloomy vibes. I thought it’s the typical high school kdrama about bullies or corruption but it’s truly exceeds my expectation. From the first episode, I already saw the potential of this drama and already hooked with the misteries. I felt so tense throughout watching the entire drama. I kept clicking the next eps to find out if things are getting better and if there is any clue to the misteries here. But I swear everytime I thought I figure something out, this drama always has surprises to give. So brilliant. I stan.

9. At Eighteen

We could tell from the title that this drama must be related to the dynamic life of 18 years old teenagers. Considering this is the age where we explore ourselves, this drama portrayed how different teens could have different issues to face: trying to fit in at school, stand up against bullies, trying to be in top tier at school, trying to get good grades whether it’s to get into reputable colleges or to meet parents’ high expectation, trying to experience romance, AND exploring sexual orientation (actually this is the first kdrama i’ve watched that portrayed gay issues so I was like wow??). So, the stories aren’t only focused on the main characters, but the side characters too. Though I really adore the main guy in this drama: Choi Jun Woo. I even made an essay about why I think he’s an ideal guy lol. If you’re interested, here you go

Not only does this drama describe the issues faced by 18 yo students, but also the struggles faced by the teacher. It shows us how teachers can feel nervous too whenever he’s about to teach or deal with the students, how certain teachers care about the wellbeings of their students, not just care about their grades. I appreciate that from the drama, really, I do. This drama is calm, heartwarming, and meaningful.

10.  Love Alarm

Tried to watch it because of Kim So Hyun, and I quickly got invested in the stories. I like the futuristic theme in this drama. The idea of a Love Alarm app itself is already interesting. Moreover, So Hyun has good chemistry with both guys. Though I don’t find both lead and second lead guys as my best type of guys, but I couldn’t stop watching it and I don’t regret watching it. Their lovestories are bittersweet which kept me looking forward for more. The last episode ended in cliffhanger though, typical Netflix series. If you don’t like uncertainty and want to watch this drama, I suggest you to wait until season 2 is released (yes, they announced there will be a season 2).

k-drama recommendation: 2/?

[just-themys]

I'd love to hear what you think about Mia and Diego's relationship 😊

Thank you my anonymous enabler

*cracks fingers* 

I should probably preface this by saying I’m not even an active miego shipper. But I hate seeing people mischaracterizing characters to fit their narrative, especially when ignoring canon elements. I also should add that I’m sorry if the pics are blurry/small, I had to find a work around because I struggled to upload them.

The big thing I’ve seen around is the idea that Mia’s and Diego’s relationship was somehow abusive, that Mia didn’t actually like Diego, and/or that Diego/Godot only liked the idea of her. The thing is that we have no canon basis for this. I’ll try to keep it short (mostly because I need to replay the game for more things, and that the Diego/Godot part would be too long). Basically I’m going to focus on Mia.

We have no canon basis to pretend she didn’t like him. I mean, she did decided to face her trauma from her first trial to get a chance to avenge what happened to Diego and frame the person who poisoned him. Even Grossberg says it, “Oh, now I understand why you asked to take this case.”

Remember how she punches Grossberg each time Feenie mentions how much he loves Dahlia ? We fandom often jokes about it, saying she just finds him embarrassing and sickenly sweet, but she didn’t react that way when Larry would do the same in 1-1. No, the reason she does it is probably out of rage and grief. I mean, Diego’s poisoning was only 8 months old. She was robbed of what Feenie (thought he) had with Dahlia, and couldn’t bear seeing him brag about how much in love he is and how happy he is with her (and on top of that, with the very person who took Diego away from her).

Mia was mad, and hurt by what happened to Diego, and being able to get Dahlia convicted was a huge step into helping her moving on. 

This is a first step to explain why she “barely acknowledged him in T&T” (the main argument of the anti-miego), because she already moved on. The other explanation might just be that of storage room. T&T is one of the longest game (originally planned for GBA), and they had already used a lot of tricks to take less space, taking this occasion to enter a new judge, and a very intricate plot running through the whole game. They most likely didn’t have time to give to their past relationship, based on all the hints we have. Just see how the anime is adding little bits about their relationship, and how many official art feature them happily together

Speaking of which, let’s review Mia’s attitude toward Diego/Godot in official art:

Mia’s attitude is relaxed, she’s often smiling, looking at him, standing/sitting close to him and being in interaction with him (drinking coffee, talking, etc.) Does she really give off vibes of being unhappy with him or wanting to fly the interaction ? not really. 

And even less on that one art 

Where she looks playful, takes his arm and is here without having even been channeled.

These last pics bring me to talk about Diego’s attitude toward Mia (outside the cute coffee sharing). A big argument I see against Diego is that he supposedly belittles her and doesn’t think she can do things on her own/is overprotective to a unhealthy/sexist extend. I say this is bullshit, and all my following argument is going to be summarized in this collage (original post courtesy of @draincyanide , hope you don’t mind me tagging you here)

Wow, really belittling (especially from a senior attorney to a rookie on her first trial). I know this impression also comes from the “kitten” nickname, but really, Diego/Godot calls “kitten” anyone he finds is a position of being more weak/young/in need of protection, whatever the gender (see, Ron DeLite, and Miles in the Official Casebook Volume 2 when Miles ends up trapped in a kid’s body). Does it mean he thinks she can’t do it ? no. It’s just how she is, at the beginning of her first trial. She’s in need of a little kick to assert herself, and it’s exactly what he does by often teasing/roasting her. He does such things as to make an objection and let her explain it, or underline her situation to push her to find a way to turn things around. He’s not trying to roast her for the likes of it, or to maintain her under his “protection”. On the contrary, he’s assisting her in her first trial, and pushing her to assert herself, be confident and eventually fly on her own. He’s acting as a mentor. And he doesn’t bat an eye either when she calls him out on his coffee addiction and talk back (I get the feeling their relation would have a lot of mutual roasting). He’s actually pushing her out of her comfort zone so she can be more independent and fend for herself.

Also, her famous sentence of “It’s in the harder times that a lawyer must put on their bigger smile” is directly inspired by Diego’s “The only time a lawyer can cry is when it’s all over”. Diego positively influenced her and her career.

To finish, I’d like to put some words on what is, to me, the chore of the issue: before T&T, many people headcannoned Mia as a lesbian and shipped her with Lana. No issue with it. But for  some reasons, people couldn’t get behind the idea that she could be *gasp* bi, and that she could have been in a happy relationship with Diego. But I will tell you: you can ship this while acknowledging that Mia could be bi in canon, without making her past relationship abusive.

Just because a relationship ended doesn’t mean it was abusive. There’s plenty other reasons for a relationship to end, and in this case, a coma with very little chance of waking up from it is a pretty good reason. You even have the basis for a hurt/comfort scenario with Lana supporting Mia through this hardship, without changing one bit from the canon. Why try to frame Diego as an abuser to justify your ship ? you don’t need to.

Trying to vilify this relationship in that type narrative is not as progressive as it might sound. It actually participates into a scheme of shaming bi women’s m/w relationships. But I’ll tell you a secret: if you don’t support bi women no matter the gender of their partner, you’re not supporting bi women at all. Supporting them only when they’re with girls means you only accept half of their identity, and it shows in your vain attempt to vilify Mia’s past m/w relationship when you have no need for it to ship her with a girl.

Secondly, it also participates into the narrative of the “chosen” sexuality. As much appealing as it sounds, making women “turn lesbians” because of disappointing or hurtful past relationships with men perpetuates the idea that sexual orientation is a choice, and that if gay people are being bullied, in a way, they chose it (and that gives ground to the straight people’s idea that this can be “fixed back” by meeting the proper person who will turn them back straight).

You know what could be truly progressive, if you really can’t fathom the idea of Mia being bi ? Mia realizing she’s actually not attracted to men and breaking up with Diego after this. And I’ll tell you one more secret: you don’t even have to make Diego be an asshole in this situation. Try it, it’ll save you a lot of energy.

tl;dr There is actually more grounds to defend the idea that Mia and Diego were a happy couple than to assert that they were abusive/didn’t really like each other. I believe that shipping bias and character preferences play a big role in this negative, but you can totally ship your wIw ship while following canon (and even in canon-divergent AUs) without having to make this relationship abusive. Also, support bi girls.

[random-dvf-posts]

Ask!

Jay! (A goddess of the moon, but not known for that, infact it's a secret in her case. Often shipped with Sea Breeze, Gust, Cyber, or Iceflower. Only real canon ship is Anti.)

Rai (Half human, half pupper. Childhood friend of Tyy. Often shipped with Spark or Irene Wolf)

Tyy (Teen boy. His appearances range from 11 - 17 usually. Was trapped in a painful area where he meets people, make relationships with them, reset, then they forget him. Shima found him. Rainbow Hawk made him his own AU with nice fields, a portal to the ors, no resets, and a nice house. Often shipped with Lunars, Sizzle, or Mino)

Alternate Clock (Goddess of Dimensions. Origins are unknown, and she is still getting used to staying in one reality. Usually shipped with Cyber)

Rainbow Wishes (Goddess of Wishes. Usually seen as the leader of the gods. Often shipped with Lightning Lane)

Syle (Joyful Lesbian Kirin. Dating Mina. Found trapped in a dimension where it's just... A mountain area. Amnesia from before being there.)

Mina (Jay and Anti's ship kid. Dating Syle. Disobedient but fun)

Lyri (Jay and Anti's second ship kid. Obedient and joyful normally. Crush on Rai)

Iceflower Drop (Goddess of Nature. Dated/dating Icicle Zapp. Can control plants. Abnormal strength and pansexual. Often shipped with Jay, Icicle, Lightning, or Tyy)

Cyber Lane (God of The Afterlife. Often shipped with Alternate Clock or Jay. A spirit.)

Sunset Shy (Iceflower's little sister. Goddess of The Sun. Mute. Often shipped with Icicle.)

Lightning Lane (God of Electricity. Brother of Cyber and Spark. Often shipped with Iceflower or Rainbow Wishes. Cyborg. A bear with a large lung disorder- where about 2/7 of his lungs had exploded mid-roar -ripped out his eye, trying to give him a hug.)

Speed Demon (God of Speed and claims to be the God of Ships too. Crush on Icicle but Icicle hates him. High-pitched voice. Tried forcing love. Because of his voice, he's often assumed to be a girl. So he went along with it for a while. Often shipped with Dizzy)

Sea Breeze (Goddess of Water. Extremely depressed, due to every other God and goddess hating on her. Crush on Rai and Tyy. Often shipped with Rai, Jay, or Icicle.)

Ivan (God of building. Often seen as useless and isn't included in much. Built the treehouse.)

Timelight (Ship kid of Cyber Lane and Alternate Clock. Goddess of Time and Space. Crush on Gray Skies.)

Rainbow Hawk (Overpowered but takes it for granted. Above God level and depressed. Sometimes shipped with Gust.)

Gust Dash (God of Wind. Crush on Jay!, Elisse, and Iceflower. Often shipped with Elisse. Depressed due to other gods and goddesses hating on him.)

Shein (Innocent boi. Gives off the same vibes as Tyy. Almost as if They're related. Moon irises. Often shipped with Lunars)

Dizzy Chaos (Daughter of Chaos. Sister of Iceflower and Sunset Shy. Loves Chaos and uses it whenever she can. Hates gods and loves pulling cruel pranks on them and even at one point made them kill each other in a survival game, appearing as Rainbow Hawk to them, making her an enemy. Crush on Zyke and Sprinkle. Draconequus. High-pitched voice. If killed, Zyke will do anything to get revenge for her. He goes crazy. No longer any sanity. Dizzy is deadly but loves cuddles from Zyke. Best friend/boss of Zyke. Often shipped with Lilly, Zyke, or Speed)

Zyke (Changeling. Assistant/best friend of Dizzy Chaos. Crush on Dizzy Chaos. Shy boi, and frienemy of Gods. Although They're extremely close, Dizzy often uses him.)

Chase (Gay boi. Innocent and has a crush on Zyke, Aiden, and Stripes. Normally wears green and has blue hair.)

Sarah (dating Tom. Icewing. Side character )

Tom (Dating Sarah. Floofy boi. Nightwing. Side character )

Tim (SandWing. Tom and Sarah's friend. Side character )

Sizzle (Ship kid of Tom and Sarah. More important to the story. Crush on Tyy. Gay boi.)

Jerry (FUCK YOU JERRY!! Side Character. Hated by everyone because he fucking sucks. Ghost. He doesn't deserve anyone or anything except the ability to cry and have existential crisis'.)

Mino and Milo (Demons that follow Jay. Milo is a former spirit of a seven year old non binary who died in the late 18th century. They were framed for murder by the demon haunting them called Mino. Mino still follows Milo and tries to encourage them to do bad stuff. Mino is often shipped with Tyy)

Ribbon (Mine but not necessarily Jayverse!. Cross Sans x Blueberry Sans ship kid. Dating Limbo.)

Spark Lane (Sister of Cyber and Lightning. Obsessed With technology. Goddess of Electricity. High-pitched voice. Dating Rai)

Blare (Dating Blae. an artist. Often annoyed by Blae but still loves her. First introduced in Ripple's hometown village. He was, when they Ripple returned with Tyy, drawing. Blae was annoying him but he was managing. Like everyone else in Ripple's hometown, he and Blae acted normal. Like there was no magic or anything. But they were half Neko and half Wolf. Blare had wolf ears and a cat tail.)

Blae (Dating Blare. A simple hyper townie. Often annoys Blare but obviously loves him alot. First introduced in Ripple's hometown village. She was, when Ripple returned with Rai, annoying Blare about what he was drawing. Like everyone else in Ripple's hometown, she and Blare acted normal. Like there was no magic or anything. But they were half neko half wolf. Blae had cat ears and a wolf tail.)

Ripple (Half deer, half human. She showed up in the forests of Tyy's new dimension. Tyy, Rai, and Irene Wolf found her. They found out she came from a village on the other side of the forest. The village was called " Meresville ". The Townies lived normal lives. Without magic. It turns out she's slight royalty. Her father works for the FBI. Her mother is... A alcoholic.. After PJ and Tyy broke up, (THAT WAS CANON, YES.) her, having become great friends with PJ and Tyy, soon started dating Tyy.)

Ripple's mother (An alcoholic at the time of the story. Abusive and upset most the time. Eats cereal with vodka instead of milk. Messed up. Real name is Carolyn Silvers. Side character. Normal human from Meresville.)

Ripple's father (A FBI agent and a CEO of an international airport business. Almost always at work, and hates Ripple's mother. Screams "FBI OPEN UP!!" naturally before entering rooms. Kicks down every door this happens to. Has nearly put himself in debt from this. Real name is Clark Tap. Side character. Normal human from Meresville.)

Irene Wolf (The goddess of Animals. Currently dating Rai. Tyy found her where he used to be trapped. He brought her to the dimension RH made for her, and she 'met' a few people. Elisse remembered her, but nobody else. She claimed to be trapped there for around a week. Rainbow Hawk showed up to greet her because of the fact she had been missing for multiple years. Before this, Rainbow Hawk and Irene had never really met. She couldn't question much though. She was revealed to have been trapped in that dimension for 5 years. Dizzy showed up and was immediately requested to leave. She did, But that raised a question for Irene. Of course, that question was who was she. They talked about Dizzy for a bit and eventually started talking about the Survival Game. Rai got emotional and went into the forest. Irene went to talk with him. This brought them to a first kiss.. They were friends for over a week- This was later, after she met them)

Daniel (Used to be a Registered sex offender. He was always in heat... He mainly claimed Mark as his boyfriend (although Mark hated that) but tried starting relationships with anyone he could. Met PJ and was shown Underlust. Is now scared of what used to be and kinda has a crush on PJ. Also has a crush on both Rai and Irene Wolf. Currently enrolled in a highschool run by only Rainbow Hawk. One of the students, Allison, a witch who was new at the time, gave him bunny ears. He doesn't know how to get rid of them. Has become good friends with PJ and has a crush. Was shown AUs so is aware of alot. Human from Meresville.)

Mark (past main victim of Daniel. Was Annoyed by him, but... Kinda liked him tbh. Side character. Regular human from Meresville.)

Stripe (Spot's brother. Dating Chase. Side character.)

Spot (Stripe's brother. Side character.)

Graysie ( Former bully. Crush on Spot. Past Victim of Daniel. Side character)

Luck Spark (Goddess of Luck. She can't do much and isn't included with anything often. Never had a ship. Status has always been single.)

Ziko (... Story hasn't been figured out, but is like Shein.)

Valerie (Former slut. She's currently depressed about it and recovering from that horrifying phase. Side character.)

Fyre (Same species as Tyy, still in progress.)

Damien (Edgy bastard boi but actually soft boi. Was dating Shima. Works for Dizzy. Still in progress.)

Shima (Shapeshifter. Elisse claims she's a changeling, therefore wants her to die. Gets in fights with Elisse weekly/daily. After her home village burnt down, she was convinced she was the last of her kind. In Jayverse!, this is Babs' (MLP character) origin. She was scared of being judged for being a changeling. So when her home was burnt to ash and she felt she had to live with regular people, she turned into Babs. That's not what Shima is known for though.)

Dare (A teen boy. Very calm and relaxed usually. Human from Meresville. Slight crush on Allison. Goes to a Highschool run by only Rainbow Hawk.)

Addison (A young witch. Loves T or D, and Dare's best friend. Goes to a Highschool run by only Rainbow Hawk, with Dare sharing the dorm.)

Aiden (Gay. Crush on Chase, and side character.)

[tastethegrace]

Analyzing “Montero (Call Me By Your Name)”

I don’t often post things as they’re having their cultural moment.  However, this song by Lil Nas X, a rap/hip hop/pop artist, who is famous for his song “Old Town Road” a few years ago, has caused quite the stir.  On one side of the fence is the LGBTQ+ community, who touts this song as an anthem to the artist’s sexual identity.  On the other are the Christians, many of whom have posted warnings on social media, urging fellow believers to “wake up,” guard their children, and many calling down the name of Jesus against the Satanic imagery associated with it.  The music video for this song sees the artist depicted as Eve in the garden of Eden, being seduced by the serpent.  He is then on trial, then descends into hell, where he himself seduces the Devil.  The artist has also partnered with street wear brand MSCHF to produced what many are calling “Satan shoes.”  These shoes apparently have contain one drop of human blood in the soul, have a black and red color scheme with pentagrams painted on the soul and attached to the laces.  

So first off, the reason I’m writing this post is to critique the Christian reaction to this song and its associated media.  It’s important to understand this right off the bat, as I will not be analyzing this song on its artistic merits.  Instead, I will attempt to analyze the artist’s intent behind the imagery and symbolism he chooses to use.  

If there’s one thing that I have grown to understand, it’s that the American Church has a fundamental misunderstanding of how believers are to interact with culture.  We have been stuck in the same culture war for decades, with this idea that we must enforce our beliefs on others, affect change through politics and protests, and fear all that is antithetical to the Christian belief system.  This latter point is the most significant, and one that many of my Christian friends may dispute.  

Let me explain here.  In the age of social media, everyone judges and reacts quickly, posting their affirmations and protests for everyone to see without putting much thought into what they’re actually critiquing.  Sadly, the American Church, most of the time, has followed suit.  Rather than choosing a different way to interact with the world on social media, it has become a leading reactionary voice -- a more intense version of what already exists in the mainstream.  It has so become the case that the world looks on and mocks.

As a younger Christian, I went with the flow, just as everyone else did.  But as a I grew up, and especially in college, I learned the importance of questioning, of slowing down, of considering the ins and outs, the truths and lies present in our everyday world.  I believe this process gives insight into the presence of God in our everyday lives, presenting us with his truth and beauty, present even in the darkest of places.  It also gives us the ability to, like Jesus, call something what it actually is, diminishing its power, and responding to it with the importance/weight it deserves.

Now understanding this context and the process by which I will move forward, let’s talk about this song.  First of all, the lyrics explicitly discuss the artist’s encounters with one specific person, a male in this context.  There’s a couple of levels to this song.  The first, that many in the LGBTQ+ community point out, is that he says that his partner “lives in the dark,” while he himself “cannot pretend.”  This refers to the fact that his partner is a closeted gay man, while Lil Nas is out.  As for the rest of the lyrics here, Lil Nas discusses his attachment to this man and the sexual experiences he has and wants to have with him.  He mentions the use of drugs to illustrate a hellish environment.  On a deeper level, evidenced even more clearly in the music video, Lil Nas is using this situation as a metaphor to reach out to his former, closeted self.  

In the interest of digging for the truth, I would go one step further here.  While it is obvious that the artist wishes to affirm his former self and encourage a lifestyle that is honest, at the very least, he also confesses what he wants very clearly.  All of the explicit imagery here is true to his experience.  So what does he want?  He wants deep connection, intimate experiences, and he’s ultimately willing to go to “hell” to get it, even if his partner won’t come out.  

Why is it important to understand this?  Am I trying to affirm how Lil Nas gets what he wants?  No, but that’s also not the point.  Understanding the artist’s questions are just as important as understanding his answers; in my opinion, even more so.  In order to make any sort of true judgment of merit or integrity, either subjective or objective, it’s important to understand fully how the artist is coming to his conclusions.  

Moving on to the music video, I’m going to use an analysis posted by reddit user margarita_atwood, as she discusses much of I what I found myself.

Everyone is going to have an opinion on this video, whether that opinion is heavily in favor or disfavor...Later, I’ll talk about why the negative opinions about this video don’t really matter and actually play right into LNX’s plans.

Lil Nas as every character: Through the miracle of CGI, LNX plays every single character. Some people might interpret this as LNX making love to himself in some scenes, but I think it has more to do with the Jungian concept of the Shadow Self (explained some in this video). There’s definitely some interesting psychology behind LNX playing all the parts. He’s talking to himself, seducing himself, running from himself. And I don’t think it would have had the same impact if the main characters were played by anyone else. He’s definitely being a little narcissistic, which he winks at with his own face on a Narcissus flower (daffodil) that I’ll get to next...He also says in the intro: “Welcome to Montero”, which is both this fantasy land he is creating for us in the video, and introducing us to his real self, saying welcome to the real me.

Scene 1- Garden of Eden: In the first scene. We’ve got the temptation of Adam by the snake/Satan in the Garden of Eden story mixed with Greek classical architecture motifs (sans Eve, as LNX raps “If Eve ain’t in your garden/ You know that you can/ Call me when you want”). In the reaction video I mentioned earlier, LNX talks about how growing up gay in a black church (or any church for that matter) made him repress and feel ashamed about his budding sexuality as a young adult. So while the lyrics are explicit, all of the themes in the video are very pointed allegories about how he’s dealt with his sexuality. He runs away from his tempting snake-self, meanwhile running past a Lion King-esque Mufasa cloud featuring his fate/destiny, and Narcissus flowers AKA daffodils (in the Greek myth, daffodils grew where Narcissus drowned after staring at his own reflection for too long), only to be caught by his temptation in a scene that gives me a ton of Labyrinth vibes. After his literal fall with possible Paradise Lost references to this perceived “sin,” we nearly see his alien-snake-self fellate his Adam-self. Finally, we close in on a shot of Greek writing on a tree. Some people smarter than I were able to find out that this is an excerpt from Plato’s Symposium which reads: “So in the beginning when they were cut in two, they yearned for each other’s half.” Symposium is basically a bunch of Greek philosophers telling metaphorical campfire stories about love (let’s ignore once again problematic themes of statutory rape in some of this). The excerpt in the video in particular is a part where one of Plato’s students Aristophanes gives an account of the origin of soulmates. Originally people were joined as two people to make one whole person. In this story, there were male/male, female/female, and female/male pairings and the gods became jealous and split them in two. The Montero excerpt is explaining this splitting of soul mates where they’re doomed to long for their other halves to become whole for eternity. Lots of allegories there regarding LNX trying to seduce a possibly gay man who is still in the closet.

Scene 2- The gladiator’s Colosseum: LNX then is taken as a prisoner in chains to a Greek colosseum, also full of LNX judges in Marie Antoinette wigs and faceless LNX mob spectators. I believe his character in this scene is supposed to be a Ulysses-type as his pink, fur shawl he’s wearing has a ram’s head broach...the blue LNX jury sentences him to...jail, and he gets literally stoned to death... Ulysses-LNX presumably dies and his soul is being lifted up to the heavens. An angel awaits him above, with a lot of Creation of Adam motifs (which was also hinted at on LNX’s IG). But just before he reaches his guardian angel.... a stripper pole rises up from the earth...and he rides that b**** all the way to the seventh inner circle of h*** in some thigh-high boots, tricking all the way down.

Scene 3- Twerking on the devil: And now we get to the biggest scandal. LNX said to those of you who think gays deserve to go to hell, watch me go to hell and give Satan a lap dance....he’s one-upping the shock factor in each part. Think it’s scandalous to go down on myself? Just wait. There’s some trolling of Illuminati/Satanist conspiracy rumors in the motifs. Honestly, the purpose of this scene is that he knew religious types would try and metaphorically crucify him over the lyrics. So he said let me beat you to it. He’s trolling the religious hater that I’m sure made his life growing up a proverbial hell already. And hey, the more times they stream and react to the song out of anger, the more money he makes from their anger. And then he goes and pulls a mafia hit, killing Satan after seducing him, and taking his horns of braids and becoming the fallen angel...

While perhaps not stated the most eloquently, and obviously from a more approving light, the OP gives us some insight into the symbolism used in this video.  On first glance, the believer might gag at how biblical imagery is used and twisted here.  However, I would encourage that believer to be patient and consider for a moment a few things.

1. If we let our gut reaction to this imagery become our public reaction, we prove the artist’s perspective of believers correct in the eyes of the world.  

2. If we consider the symbols and imagery used, it is obvious that this piece was intricately planned by Lil Nas to suggest his conclusions through the subversion of cultural norms.  This is not a new technique by any means, and it is important to acknowledge this.

3. Remember that Lil Nas was raised in the church.  His use of biblical imagery is intentional here.  If you detect a hint of bitterness in the twists he uses, that’s because there is, and not without reason.

See, I think that if Jesus looked at this video and gave us his reaction, it would not be a warning to us to guard our hearts.  That’s common sense.  I think it would be sadness that Lil Nas has not experienced the true intimacy and connection that he so desires in a healthy context, but also that he would be so bitter as to use the imagery as a “F*** You!” to the church.  Granted, this is all speculative, but when I look at Jesus in the gospels, I never see Jesus trying to separate or isolate his disciples from sinners.  He sees right to the heart of why sinners sin, and urges his disciples by example and speech to have compassion.  It is the the Pharisees and teachers of the law who he preaches against, urging his disciples to guard their hearts against them.  

Finally, there’s the even bigger deal being made in Christian circles of the “Satan shoes.”  Let me set the record straight here.  This company put out “Jesus shoes” a couple of years ago that claimed to have holy water in its soles.  This was a stunt by the artist for the very purpose of causing controversy.  It was done out of anger.  The imagery only has power if we let it be something other than what it is.

I have seen so many people decrying the use of this imagery as an act of devil worship.  That’s not what this is.  Is Lil Nas believing a lie?  Most certainly, as all humans do every day.  But this should not be shocking.  We must look behind the symbols to what they’re really pointing to.

In conclusion, I felt that it was important to share my feelings on this, as the social media chatter is a prime example of how the American Church has lost its way.  However, on a more personal note, I have a lot of history and connection that helps me to deeply understand what’s happening in this song.  That drive for connection, that willingness to put myself in horrible places to find it, the feeling of dirtiness and the running away from it...and especially the now often used intimate metaphor “call me by your name,” referring to the book/move of that title...I’ve been there.  I even embraced it for a time.  So more than most, I am more inclined to have compassion on those who are in that place, even if they don’t see the fruitlessness of it.  The Lord has been good to me.  He was with me in that place, just as he is with me now.  It is important for all who call themselves Christians to remember that before we judge, we must seek empathy and compassion, fullness of understanding, and most of all, the heart and mind of Jesus himself.

[the-mf-bread-babies]

loneliness </\///\|/3

a fic by rocco wulfram north, m.d.

(found that name on hardcore baby names)

–chmapter jop–

before the tríp

It was a normal day for the Skullsmashers: go to somewhere, kill people, be gay, sleep, get brunch. Right now was the first part of their daily routine, and they were getting ready for it.

“holy fuck nova could you hurry the shit up i have to brush my fucking teeth you bitch” Ace hissed, knocking repeatedly on the bathroom door. “Fuck You. I'm Going To Go To Hell Itself” Nova gargled back, mouth full of mouthwash. More banging was heard; the door had seen better days.

Several feet away was Jake, all dressed up and ready to go, waiting for the others to get ready. He sat on the couch gayly in the living room down the hall, scrolling through Apocalypse Twitter. ‘every day i throw down an unpeeled boiled egg from the rooftop to simulate fear and unreadiness’ he read, a tweet from Orc's account. What the fuck. Classic Orc.

“ah fuck !! am i late !!” Jake turned around to see Damon panicking and counting the daggers in his pockets. “no no not at all. i just get ready really quickly to throw everyone into a state of disarray” Jake replied in an honest, monotone voice. “come sit down”

Damon sat down nervously next to his captain, knowing he'll ask him for Bambi on the PS2 now. “look. look at them those dumbshits” Jake uttered, pointing to Ace and Nova arguing. “those little bastards are completely unaware that ive put a fake cockroach puppet in the mirror. watch now” he added, pulling out a cheap remote control and pressing a button.

*sound of glass breaking* Jake sighed. “okay maybe that wasn't really the best idea” Nova screamed, running out of the bathroom and confusing Ace. “Fucking Roach!!!!!!!!!!!!!” she yelled, already too far away from them to be heard clearly. “huh. well okay then!” Ace grinned, going into the bathroom.

“i'll guard. you do your thing okay? :-)” Damon said to Jake, smiling mischievously. Jake's heart skipped a beat as he was suddenly flustered by the killer's action. «oh god, shit's just gonna get more complicated from here» he thought, staring into nothingness.

Damon braced himself against the bathroom door, eager to hear Ace's chaotic screaming. “ready ??” Damon asked, sending Jake back to the real world. “hhuh??????? oh yea right” he mumbled before beginning to control the cockroach with the remote. “this shit cost me like 200 bucks so it better be worth it”

HOLY MOTHER OF

F U C K

JAKE JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

WHAT THE S H IT DUDE

ace will remember this.

Jake cackled loudly, rolling on the floor and hitting the table with his fist. “LMAOOOOK FUCK YOUUU” he yelled, angering Ace even more. “I WILL GODDAMN SKIN UOUR FUCKIGN ISTINEDSTINES OLD MAN I SWEAR TKC FUCKF” they yelled back, pushing the door repeatedly. “IM GOIND TO FUCKIGN DIR HERE YOU BITCH”

“ah . ace ? could you move a little please ? i'm trying to get in ?” Damon said annoyingly kindly, making Ace jab a fake knife through the space between the door and the doorway. “THIS IS THE BEST FUCKIGN KNIFE I HAVE ON ME RIGT NOW BUT PLEADR JSUT FUCK O F F”

“hm ... i'll have to check in with the blacksmith today to know what this one's worth... possibly rusted here, though.... could also just be dirt tho.....” Damon mumbled, examining the knife. “FUCKING HEL P” Ace yelled in distress, his breath seeping through the door. “ace. brush your fucking teeth that's disgusting.”

“IM FUCKIF D TRYINF THERES JUST A FUCKGIFN ROSCH HEREERF” Ace explained fearfully, trying their best to get some pity from the other. “a what ?? don't think we have those here” “A FUCKIFN COKROSKC” “corrosion ???? how bad” “FUCK YOU A GODDMAND COKCROACH” “girls?? what?? are they milfs??” “HOW THEE DFUCKDB DID YEOU HEAR FTHAY WHATS DUCUNESKRHI”

Jake's hand slapped against Damon's shoulder as a way of saying thanks. “good work out there soldier. us skullsmashers really need someone like you damon” He said confidently, disguising his flirting as a compliment. “cool !! you too man !!” The shorter man replied, completely unaware of the flirting and continuing to yearn for the mutual love between him and Jake. fuckin idiots lmao

“alrighty fuckers, let's move!”

Rachel's voice sent Ace and Nova into a panic, making them scram to look for their weapons and equipment. “Got everything ya need? W'ain't makin' any stops; tryin'a save fuel.” Shaw asked, leaning against the wall at the entrance menacingly. “When the fuck did you even come here.” Dennis asked in surprise, carrying suitcases. “Hmph. Man never tells his secrets, young man.” She replied, tilting her cowboy hat. “What…”

Aaron was sitting peacefully in the trunk of a pickup truck they had, only to be met by a large backpack to the face. “ah!!!!!!!! very sorry!!!!!!! we'll be going in separate vehicles, and trunk space is very much needed!!!!!!!!” Whitney said, apologizing. “Ah. Well. O-okay then.” Aaron stuttered out, holding back tears from the painful impact the backpack had. Pretty sure he'll get a bruise from that.

Henderson and Rachel were waiting in the front seats of yet another pickup truck. To pass the time, they took very cringey pictures of each other pretending to be on Cowboy TikTok™. “Do one where you're pregnant with the truck's baby!” Henderson suggested, making Rachel flip the bird at her but begrudgingly agreeing with her stupid idea. “i literally would skin you alive.” She spat out, putting a pumpkin inside her shirt. “That's… literally so sexy, babe.” Henderson replied back, taking more pictures.

Meanwhile, Andre was busy explaining to Cyprus, who was in a small glass jar, that forcibly entering Damon's bloodstream and mutilating his entire body was not very nice, with Orc and Sarah judging. “YES BUT UNLIMITED POWER COULD BE RIGHT IN OUR HANDS ANDRE” “That'd very mean of you to do, and could actually probably kill you too in the process.” he explained to deaf ears. Well, technically no ears. Yet. “CYPRUS I KNOW IT SOUNDS STUPID BUT YOU COULD LITERALLY DO THE SAME BUT LIKE IN AN ELEPHANTS BODY DUDE” Orc suggested, only to be ignored. “cmon cyprus just pleaaaaase dont kill ppl ok”

Jake looked outside, then back at Damon. “well guess its time to move!” “yea ... but at what cost.” Damon replied confusingly, making a sad face. “did you know today is…” he started, then regretted saying anything. “nvm…” He turned away from the punk, sniffling and walking to Dennis and Aaron.

“damon” “??” Jake asked quietly, craning his neck a little before making the decision to leave the new recruit alone. Instead, he joined Henderson and Rachel in their odd activities.

“hey guys. i fucking miss sans.” Damon confessed, taking a seat next to Dennis. “My nose is bleeding.” Aaron pointed out. “ok. today's sunday. and you Know what That Means… Meant,” The boy continued, facing the ground. “Kanye West he…” Dennis began (begun???? idk). “… liked.” Aaron continued, also affected emotionally by the departure of not only Sans, but Komaeda too.

Jake stared longingly at the family, wishing he was a part of it too. He truly felt Ariel Little Mermaid's desire to become human. Seven Vagánias… that was a risk he was willing to take for him. He would shave his eyebrows off for that man, and he just might do it right now.

“Jake? Don't do that. Please don't fucking do that.” Henderson suddenly interrupted, surprising Jake. “do what” Henderson squinted her eyes, giving Jake a suspicious look. “That's the face you make when you want to do silly things…” She pointed out.

“You had that when you almost electrocuted yourself at that stable, you had that when you threw the dart at Scoran, you had that when you glued Marcus and Reese–” “OKAY OKAY I GET IT IM A DUMMY SILLY LITTLE BITCH BOY OK”

Rachel put the pumpkin back on the ground and went to the two friends, curious to know what the quarrel was about. “what's poppin gayboy!” She loudly asked, slapping Jake's forearm strongly. “i am in peril and shaking and crying” “daddy issues” “yget?” He explained, gesturing towards the Russells.

“ah. please clarify what kind.” Rachel said, knowing Jake has a very questionable taste for fictional middle-aged men, such as Sigma Overwatch and the guy from the cowboy game. “the fuckin. family one rachel” “look at em just vibing and simply being gay”

Rachel and Henderson gave eachother a look that questioned whether Damon and Jake were going to be a thing or not, since Jake's technically still with Andre. “Considering the fact that they adopted Damon, they could probably also adopt you if you wanted to.” Henderson suggested, knowing Jake wouldn't like this and would stupidly unknowingly accidentally confess his love for Damon to them both right then and there.

“what?????” “ew no thatd be fuckin incest or some shit what the fuck” Jake said, being grossed out. “what would be the incestuous part, jacon. we did not say or hint at anything related to incest.” Rachel asked, making Jake's hair stand up in panic. “fuCKIN NOTHING DUH” “BUT LIKE YKNOW I GET CRUSHES REALLY EASILY YEA??????” Jake explained weirdly.

“So there's a new one right now, huh…” Henderson asked… feeling like she was in Ace Attorney. “no!!!! no wait” “well yea– no.. but i–” “fuck You but yes” Jake grumbled. “ah no, we won't tell, obviously. it was just getting way too obvious, so we just wanted to hear it from both sides.” “WH” Rachel said mysteriously, getting into the driver's seat of the pickup truck. “okay guys let's go!!” She yelled out, starting the engine. “THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN??????” “BOTH SIDES???”

chapter dos

two four trucks

The journey to god knows fuckin where idk didn't plan i guess a fuckin cabin or smth idk was long and torturous, especially when Rachel said that cryptic-ass thing before going. What the fuck was that supposed to mean, bro.

sudden interlude for seating arrangements !!

truck 1: Henderson, rachel, whitney, CYPRUS

truck 2: jake, damon, marge, Andre, Aaron

truck 3: ace, Nova, Dennis

truck 4: sarah, ORC, Shaw, viper

truck two.

Jake awkwardly patted Marge's head in the backseat of the truck, avoiding eye contact with Damon and Andre. Of course he had to go on a three-day trip in the same car with his ex, his crush, AND his crush's father. God, he was pretty sure this was the lab rats' doing.

“cows.” Damon pointed outside, earning Andre's attention. “Holy– what are those?” He asked, taking his sunglasses off to admire the beautiful little cows. “Cows… we drink their milk and wear their skin as jackets…” Aaron explained, his eyes drifting from the road momentarily. “They can have best friends and stuff. Really nice guys. Also, they're expensive as hell.”

“Y–You do what. Their skin??” Andre asked, his voice a pitch higher than usual. “yeah and we rate them based on which layer it is. also, like their meat, expensive as hell. but still very cool.” Damon said, confusing Andre even more. “they also give us cheese and ice cream and whipped cream and stuff. underrated little babies. they deserve better.” “they also have nose rings which are punk as hell–”

“Wait, why the nose– cheese?! Cheese?! AND ice cream??!” Andre asked again, his mind attempting to comprehend the greatness that cows are. “Oh man, you are not ready to hear about pigs.” Aaron said jokingly. “What the fuck are pigs???” “Sausages, ham slices, bacon, lard, leather too, rotisserie–” “aaron please i'm gonna throw up.” “Oh, right. Sorry,”

Jake sat quietly in his seat, just now realising how much of his world Andre's missing. Sure, his world was much cooler, but do they have sheep? Palm trees? Penguins? Thought not, bitch. “andre do you know what a kangaroo is” He asked, breaking his silence like that one YouTuber.

“A what?” “kangaroo. some of them are buff as shit and they move by hopping. they cant hop backwards and they also keep their babies in little pouches attached to them and their bones and guts are exposed on the inside of said pouch. baby kangaroos are about the size of a jellybean, and the adults can box you”

“They what” “yea they're weird as fuck.” “its from australia so” “That sounds fake.” “oh man. wombats bro. quokkas. fuckin drop bears and flying foxes. PLATYPUSES!!!” “wombats poop in cubes and quokkas are always smiling” “Koala bears hold onto tree branches and eat their mom's shit, which is the leaves of said tree branches.” “Please stop what the fuck” “ohoho fucking GEESE” “GET IM JAKE MY NEIGHBOR HAD FUCKIN THREE OF THOSE BITCHES”

truck three.

The three sat silently, with the exception of Dennis, who was swearing at random times. “You call that a fuckin’ turn, old man?! HUH?!!” Ace's shoulders jumped, the sudden exclamations preventing them from sleeping through the trip. “This Is Probably The Last Time We'll See Each Other Alive.” Nova stated calmly. “i slept for like two minutes last night… didn't even get to wear conditioner today. unrelated but just sharing my struggles with you.” Ace said, shifting into a more comfortable sleeping position.

Dennis overheard the two talking, and opted to stay quiet for the rest of the trip, before stumbling across a strange sight. “FROG!!!” he yelled, waking up the duo. “he said fuck! he said the f” Ace yelled out while rubbing their eyes. “Are We Aliven't” Nova asked, stretching. “Sadly, no, but the good news is, I found a frog!” Dennis excitedly said, opening the car door.

“WHAT” “THAT SHITS GONNA POISON US WHAT THE FUCK” Nova yelled out, unfortunately not loud enough for Dennis to hear it. The man kept walking towards the creature that was technically an alien to them, and picked it up with watery hands. “DENNIS YOU'RE GONNA FUCKING KILL US ALL!!!!!!! DENNIS!!!!!!”

“So, you kids know how to handle a frog?” Dennis asked in a wholesome tone, alerting the two even more. “KILL IT KILL IT FUCKING KILL IT” “Oh, are you guys allergic to this little guy? Sorry, I'll put it in the dashboard instead.” “GET ITBOUT WHAT THE FUCK DENNID JESUS” “… Huh?” “POSIOJ DART FOGR” Nova shouted, hiding behind the passenger seat and being pushed by Ace, who was also going to hide there. “BITCH”

Dennis and the frog stared at them in confusion, hearing their horrified screams. “This is… a wood frog… not a poison dart… that one would probably die in this climate…” he explained plainly, his hands gently cupping the newfound friend. “oh. ok” Ace muttered quietly, while Nova maintained an awkward silence. “You can… pat them very softly if you want.” Dennis suggested. “Or spray the shit outta them. That could work too.”

Nova nervously held out her hand to pat the frog, then smiled in succeeding to do so. “Death Quivers Before Me” She said, proceeding to pat it even more. “can i do the spray thing.” Ace asked, their voice quiet as a whisper. “Yeah, sure. Go right ahead.”

*the frog was going to die so technically they didnt like fuck up the ecosystem or smth. do not attempt this irl.

truck four.

“What jolly tunes d'ya have on this here truck. Fellas.” Shaw asked, observing the radio. “uh, really, i don't think it'll be necessary!!!!!” Viper nervously said, only to be ignored. “NONSENSE! ONE'S TASTE IN SHANTIES PROVES TO BE A WINDOW INTO THEIR LIVES.” Orc said wisely, patting them on the shoulder. “i guess that's good advice, but really–”

TWO TRUCKS HAVING SEX. TWO TRUCKS HAVING SEX. MY MUSCLES. MY MUSCLES. INVOLUNTARILY FLEX.

“I SEE. A MATING SONG FOR YOUR SPECIES?” “my truck f### playlist,.,.,.” Viper tried to mute the speaker to no avail as most of the buttons on the control panel were very much broken. “I'm. Very sorry for this, pardner. But this doesn't sound so bad. I could put this in a jukebox…” Shaw consoled, only making them panic more. “im so f#ckig sorry” They said, before smashing the radio with a briefcase.

They all paused for a moment, unsure of what to do. “i have spotify…” Sarah croaked, holding up her phone. “they have lemon demon too, if you want…” She muttered, scrolling through the song choices. “does anyone want to listen to wet a–” “no.” “okay.”

The truck grew even quieter for a while, until Shaw gave a suggestion to pass the time. “Wanna play 20 questions?” “I'll start: how many folks have y'all killed?” Viper gave the assassin a horrified look, confusing her. “I think mine's around 150. No… 145…” She confessed, rubbing her chin. “Wait, or was it 160?”

“like six. do you like girls, and, follow up question, do you also coincidentally like short girls with long hair.” Sarah said without hesitation, stopping Orc from answering the first question. “Yes! I literally have a wife!” Shaw shouted happily, rolling up her sleeves to show Sarah her tattoos. “This one is her setting herself on fire and me getting inspired–” “ah, yes–” “That one was a total cover-up! Previously, it was the names of my exes, all thirteen of them, but now, it's my cat!”

After some time of receiving a bit too much RexShaw lore, Sarah finally got the answer she so desperately needed from Viper. This was the verdict that determines whether she could make a move or not. This answer could change– “i am gay and do not get attracted to women. thank you.” Ah. Back to more hunting. “I am a lesbian! High-five!” Shaw exclaimed.

And finally, the first truck.

truck one.

Loud country music blared in the truck as they drove by the snowy mountains of uhh. Winsnow. Like winter and snow. They had all chosen separate routes in order to cover more land and see if there were any new developments in the area.

“BRANDY!!! FETCH ANOTHER ROUNF!!!!!!” Rachel screeched as she drummed on the dashboard. “AND SHE FJSJS” Henderson kept driving, searching every inch of land for a rest stop to stretch her legs and also listen to something else.

“hendy.” Rachel said, getting her girlfriend's attention. “do you wanna buy that slime that cleans cars and stuff?” Henderson stared into the distance, pondering. “Hm. There's always the possibility of the slime disappearing under mysterious circumstances and turning up in the trash can the next day covered in saliva, so.” Whitney looked away, feeling attacked.

“yeah, that's a problem.” Rachel muttered, her hand instinctually moving to Henderson's. “Please don't crash the car.” She begged, looking sadly at her. “is there a domino's nearby. i heard they have that new peanut butter chocolate lava cake.” Rachel asked, cupping Henderson's face gently.

“Rachel. There's fucking mountains.” Henderson pointed out, gesturing towards their surroundings. “That shit will freeze.” Rachel put her head down in disappointment. “yeah. damn.” “MORE FLESH!!! MORE FLESH!!! MORE FUCKING FLESH!!!”

Oh yeah, Cyprus was here the whole time. “why does the metal say fuck?????” And Whitney too! “MIND YOUR OWN GODDAMN BUSINESS. FLESH NEEDED!” Cyprus yelled out, resembling a hungry toddler on a road trip.

“do you want like a burger or something......” Whitney asked, judging the spirit. “FLESH” “like are you more of a kfc or a mcdonalds guy” “NEED FLESH” She gave the couple a look, one that was kind of undecipherable due to her lack of normal face details like eyebrows, visible pupils, etc.

“So, three peanut butter lava cakes and one meat lover's… what else?” “ah!!!!!! no lava cake for me, i'm on a diet!!!!!! dirt and dirt only!!!!!!!!!!! also fish bones as a treat” Whitney corrected, her eyes searching for a nearby body of water. “Or, we could get Cyprus the fish meat, and Whitney the bones.” “sounds good to me!!!!!!!!” “FLESH”

…

“welcome to domino's! can i get your order?”

“three peanut butter lava cakes, please. that's all. thank you.” Rachel said, her seat switched with Henderson's, who was too nervous to order. “okay but they each take like three hours to make” “what.” “yea you can stop by like the grocery store up ahead” “fuck you for ordering this” “i–” “fuck off”

the grocewy stowe

The truck stopped by the front of the building, Rachel telling them to go in first while she searches for a good parking spot. Much to Henderson's disappointment.

“My lover…” Henderson said with fear in her voice. “it's okay… go along… i… i have to do this for you…” “for you all… i won't forget the good that you've done to me and everyone i've ever known…” “Rach, please don't go, I lo–” “you all are the kindest people… heaven may wait eagerly for you, but as for me, the ground trembles for its latest meal. fresh from the oven, i will enter the furnace…” “why the fuck would they cook you again” “because i'm TOAST!!” “haha”

“Kill Ronald Reagan while you're at it… I forgot which one he is but I'm pretty sure he's a total bitch…” “i will meet you doomguy” “heeeeeeeh” Rachel whined weakly as she slowly drove over to the spot she wanted.

MOTHERFUCKER.

A silver Honda Civic quickly made its way into there, angering the scientist. “not on my watch, fucker.” Rachel muttered, sliding the pickup truck across the road. She slammed her palm onto the car horn, which terrified even a murder of crows.

“huh wonder who that is” “hm anyway which fish do u like ???? :-)”

A woman who seemed to be in her late 40s exited the Honda Civic, throwing a rather large and flashy boa around her neck. “Jesús, ít's cold in hère,” The lady commented, putting on a pair of expensive-looking sunglasses. “Márie, come along, ma cheghhy!” (i forgot how to spell it)

oh, son of a B I T C H .

it's the french lady who smells weird.

Of course, seeing your enemy in any circumstance that wasn't planned was clearly a little scary and will probably be your last day alive, but bumping into them at a Target was kinda… awkward.

Both the hazelnut and the dolphin were less armed and armoured than usual, and there weren't any bodyguards or security. Usually, if a top leader goes anywhere, the standard protocol was to do thirty separate background checks on the location and have it guarded up somewhere in the three months before their arrival.

So, obviously, someone in Top 50 driving around town in a decades-old car buying groceries isn't very safe, or probably even legal. Hell, she hasn't even seen them wear anything this ridiculous ever. Could this be a distraction? Or is it an opportunity?

Ah, wait, they're both wearing their stupid little marriage bracelets.

It's the middle of October.

This is their anniversary vacation.

Shit.

in the store

Henderson strolled through the aisles with Whitney at her side, hugging Cyprus's jar. She examined the cereal boxes to make sure they didn't contain any food colouring that could potentially kill her.

Whitney, on the other hand, zoomed over to the meat section, licking her lips at the sight of a raw cod. “cyprus…… do you feel that? the need to devour a being???? the uncontrollable desire for energy that it transcends all laws and regulations placed on mankind?????? the growing hunger for power, one that's so strong it controls your every need????

a natural, primal instinct to become such a brutal being that no one, not even you, recognise yourself anymore. you look at yourself in the mirror and you feel like you want to destroy that, to put yourself onto the pedestal you belong on, to wreak havoc on the cosmos of all beings, living and dead, real and mythical, walking and extinct.

you know that you're the only who understands this instinct, the only one who follows it to this distance. everyone else may underestimate you, but in the end, you'll rise above them all. man's natural instinct is to become the ruler of all.”

“What the fuck, Whitney. Anyway, I talked to the deli guy and he said he could pay you to eat up some scraps if you want. You down?” Henderson asked, her trolley already full of snacks. “yea fuck it man” Whitney replied, walking over to the ‘staff only’ door. “im hungy as fuck”

parking lot.

Despite the growing need to kill the woman, Rachel was managing to control herself. Even though this was the perfect opportunity to eliminate one of them, she knows she'll be replaced by someone much crueler. So for now, she'll just stick to watching this lady consider which can of tomato sauce is better than the other.

Rachel parked the truck near the entrance and the Honda Civic. She kept an eye on the couple as she quietly made her way inside through the back door.

“So thàt's when Í saìd, ‘that's not a cactùs, that's a lámp!” Karén playfully said, her hand entwined with her wife's. Rachel was unsure whether to stalk the two or join her friends in shopping.

WELL, FIND THAT OUT IN THE NEXT PART,

B I T C H !! !! !!

[motorcyclegirlfriends]

Meta question moment: in the sneak peek Mon-El acts like on Daxam lesbian relationships were not a problem at all (okay he then goes all jerk with "the more the merrier" but I think that's just how he is, his first reaction was "is it a problem here on Earth?"). So do you think that Daxam's and Krypton's culture were similar enough to assume that sexuality was more fluid than Earth's one on K. too, and then Kara might later be revealed as bi/pan without it being a big deal for her?

Welllll, what could technically be true logically is not necessarily what they would do as far as writing. So I have a few answers.

What could technically be true:

Krypton

Keep in mind that Kryptonians were similar in physiology to Daxamites, but they had vastly different cultures and judge each other accordingly.

In Daxam it’s ‘anything goes’. Sexuality does not indicate how many relationships a person has but if you don’t care how much of these are happening, chances are higher that you don’t care who it’s with. 

But Kara’s planet has been shown to be more conservative than Daxam as far as relationships go. Krypton was not past monogamy, if Kara’s opinion of Mon-El’s behavior is any indication (She considered them all to be frat boys and called him a floozy. This was in the context of Kara’s prejudice storyline, so it was likely meant to represent the ideology of Krypton and not just her own opinions). 

So Krypton isn’t “the more the merrier” but that doesn’t mean that they’re homophobic or aren’t fluid in sexual and romantic preference.

But Krypton is typically depicted as more advanced than Earth, so this may transfer over to the culture.

If Krypton took the same path Earth is taking but was further along, I’d hypothesize that they had homophobia at one point but were past that, but not past having one partner. I don’t think anyone has specifically written Krypton with homophobia, and despite Krypton’s being written by people from a heteronormative society, the universe’s default is not heteronormativity.

As for how many people are born with certain preferences, we have no way to tell.

Kara

As stated, there’s no way of knowing how many people are of what orientation from Krypton. So I can’t say if Kara would be more or less likely to be bi or pan.

But as for whether or not it would be a big deal for her if she were, Mon-El was a full grown man when he left Daxam, so he was fully socialized by them and their tolerance. Even if Krypton was particularly open in that regard, Kara came to Earth at a young age and was then exposed to the way we regard same-sex relationships. So she could feel pretty much the same way we do about it.

People realize their feelings at many different stages, so if she already had crushes on girls, that’s not as likely to be repressed or a surprise to her and she’d have been more likely to internalize positive feelings about same-sex relationships if she had reason to pay attention. If it were me, I’ve liked girls since I was at least 6 and knew what it was around 9 or 10, so I’d have made the cut by a while. But some people are more like Alex, and Kara expressed confusion at how she’d know that she liked someone in the pilot, so I’d say she’d take a while to recognize any feelings for either.

But even if, internally, she knows that It’s Okay to Be Gay™, she might hide it the way she did her powers. There’s no internal shame about it the way there may be for those from Earth, but she may fear backlash nonetheless.

Probably not the answer you were looking for, but the way Kara looks so impressed by Mon-El for Daxam’s tolerance, she’s not as nonchalant as one might have guessed.

What they’d probably make true:

Krypton

If you ask the writers “Do Kryptonians care if people are gay?” they’re probably gonna say no. Especially these writers, since they are aiming for positive representation in this matter. The fact that they even mentioned that Daxamites don’t care probably means we’d get a positive answer.

But they if haven’t talked about it yet, they probably won’t. Alex coming out was a perfect opportunity to discuss the differences in culture, but they went a different direction.

Kara

They’re not going to make Kara pan or bi, because they wouldn’t do it without giving her a female love interest, and they’re not going to risk lose their straight viewers. Not because they’re pandering to homophobic viewers, they’ve likely lost the majority of those already, but because they still need straight people to like their show. If Kara ends up in a relationship with a girl, even if it’s a love triangle with the guy waiting to the side, the straights may stop watching.

Unlike minorities, white straight women and men have a plethora of choices of things to watch. If there are no straight relationships in something, and they want to see themselves in a relationship (which, given how every damn movie has to have a love interest, it seems like they do) they can just move on to another superhero show about a guy and a girl.

Also, there are gay people writing this, that much we can tell from the nuance of Alex’s coming out story, but there are straight people to. And straight writers feel the same way straight viewers do, they want to see themselves. We all want to see ourselves. And if the majority of a writer’s room isn’t gay, then the majority of the show won’t be gay. This is just typically how it goes. Not when people make an effort, but Sanvers probably feels like enough to them. (Not in a “this should satisfy the peasants” kind of way but in a “why would we think to do more?” kind of way.)

(Also, it was just mentioned in passing, but I didn’t really have a problem with the “more the merrier” joke, because I don’t have an issue with people who like a lot of sex. It’s his character and culture, and he didn’t direct any creepy vibes toward sanvers or anything. I can see myself making the same kind of joke to my friends, tbh.)

[yawednesdays-blog]

MOXIE is more than just a book, it’s a call to action! We talk all things Riot Grrl, music and our misspent youth with author Jennifer Mathieu.

The Riot Grrl movement was born out of the feminist punk scene of the 1990s. Nearly 20 years later and so much has changed, but even more has stayed the same. There is still a need for female unity. There is still a need for feminist activism. There is still a need for Riot Grrl. Jennifer Mathieu’s new book MOXIE reminds us of all the reasons we need REVOLUTION GIRL STYLE NOW!

YA WEDNESDAY PRESENTS:

An Interview With Jennifer Mathieu

Q: The dedication of this book is badass but it makes me think this story is personal. What inspired Moxie?

A: Writing that dedication was, truly, the most fun I have had writing in years. It was very cathartic. I think I was inspired to write Moxie not only because of my personal interest in Riot Grrrl and feminism (which really started during college) but also because I wanted to write the sort of book my high school self would have wanted to read. My high school was very conservative, stifling, and especially restrictive when it came to gender roles. It was the early 90s in the suburbs and it was hard. The teacher to whom I dedicated the book also bragged about giving his wife a frying pan for her birthday. The vibe was just gross and in my gut I knew it. But I didn’t have Moxie or anything like it, so I decided to write the book I wish I’d had when I was 15.

Q: I grew up in small town not unlike East Rockport High and Vivian’s story felt very real to me. Was your high school experience like what was described in Moxie?

A: Yes, in a lot of ways. I didn’t grow up in a small town, but the sports teams were very important at my school. My school was religious, too, so in many ways it was very conservative. I don’t mean to imply you can’t be religious and progressive or religious and a feminist, but my school was very conservative in its approach to social issues. It put a high premium on conformity. I had several bad experiences there. The teacher to whom I dedicated the book was one of them. I also had my cheerleading coach imply I needed to lose weight. It was really gross.

Q: Music was such a large part of the Riot Grrl movement and Vivian’s story. What songs fueled you while writing Moxie?

A: I remember the first girl punk song that blew my mind was Cherry Bomb by the Runaways. I discovered it in high school because it was on the Dazed and Confused soundtrack, which I played obsessively on cassette – lol! When I got to Northwestern for college, I met up with people who I really connected with, and they introduced me to punk. I listened to a lot of those songs as I was writing Moxie, including a ton of Bikini Kill, of course. I listened to Cool Schmool by Bratmobile repeatedly as well as a lot of Team Dresch songs. I listened to a lot of music by bands that came a bit after the RG movement, including Sleater-Kinney and Cadallaca. I don’t always listen to music when I write, but for this book I definitely did!

  Q: In Moxie, Vivian finds a box of paraphernalia from her mother’s high school days called “My Misspent Youth” box. What would be in your My Misspent Youth box?

A: Great question! It’s funny because after the book went to print I wondered if I should have called that box something else because I don’t think Vivian’s mom thought her youth was misspent – she was mostly being tongue in cheek about it! Her youth was important and revelatory for her as was mine. I’m 40 years old, and I think I would include my ticket stubs from all the shows I went to – Fugazi, Sleater-Kinney, The Queers, etc. as well as some of the books that made a real impact on me, including Slouching Towards Bethlehem by Joan Didion and the Sisterhood is Powerful anthology, edited by Robin Morgan. I’d include some of my journals and the letters and postcards my friends and I wrote to each other – we were part of the last generation to write to one another instead of just email or text. I would also include Zine, the Pagan’s Head zine anthology by Pagan Kennedy, which introduced me to zine culture and what zines are all about.

A few item from Jennifer’s “My Misspent Youth” box.

  Q: Vivian was inspired by the Riot Grrl movement from the 1990s. What historical movement or individuals inspired you both in high school and now?

A: For me personally, looking at feminism’s second wave, I am deeply inspired by Gloria Steinem and Audre Lorde. I had the opportunity to hear Gloria speak when I was in college and it was an amazing experience. Audre Lorde’s “Sister Outsider” collection is as relevant today as ever, especially in regard to feminism needing to be inclusive and not just a movement full of middle class white women. As far as RG, I was and still am inspired by Kathleen Hanna, the lead singer of Bikini Kill and later Le Tigre and The Julie Ruin. I know in her early years she shunned off the “leader” title, but she is so charismatic, inspiring, and hilarious it’s no surprise that word kept getting thrown at her. I have also been so impressed by Beth Ditto, who led the band Gossip and is now a solo artist. I recently read her autobiography From Coal to Diamonds and was so touched by her insight and honesty. She was really influenced by the Riot Grrrl movement as well. And finally, Roxane Gay is one of the most important feminist voices out there right now. She should be required reading in schools, and that’s why I name dropped her in Moxie! LOL!

Some of the woman that inspire Jennifer Mathieu. Take note ladies.

Q: In Moxie, some students are less than enthusiastic with the idea of a feminist agenda at their school. What would you say to anyone who thinks “feminist” is a dirty word? 

A: I would be really gentle with them because arguing back isn’t going to help change their minds. I would ask them why the think this way. For a lot of people I think it’s the media’s influence or just stuff heard at home. Feminists are man haters or can’t wear makeup – just dumb stereotypes that get circulated online and elsewhere. I would ask them if they think women and men should be paid the same. I would ask them if men should be able to cry in public and not get shamed for it. I would ask them if childcare and housework should be valued no matter who does it. Feminism isn’t scary if you think about it like that – it’s really about liberation for everyone from stifling and repressive stereotypes. As the great bell hooks said, feminism is for everybody. It’s about love, inclusivity, and living authentically.  I think approaching the conversation that way might help.

Q: After finishing Moxie I was ready to take over the world! What would you suggest for girls who want to continue the Moxie movement after they finish this kick-ass book?

A: I’m so glad you felt this way! I didn’t want Moxie to be the ending point but rather the starting point, so with the help of my former student, Lexi Acevedo, I created the Moxie Tumblr which can be found at moxiegirlsfightback.com. There you can find resources, a playlist, and tips on starting your own Moxie Club at your school! You can also Ask a Moxie Girl a question or submit original art and writing to be shared on the Tumblr. It’s my hope that the Moxie movement really becomes a community. The book is already out in the UK and I recently heard from two young women over there who are working on their own zines and starting a Moxie Club! i wanted to scream with excitement! Actually, I did!

Q: So, the rights to Moxie have been acquired by Amy Poehler’s production company (yay!). What songs would be on your dream Moxie soundtrack?

A: Yes, right now the screenplay is being developed and we’ll see what happens from there! As for my dream soundtrack, I would recommend every song on the Moxie playlist, which you can find on the Tumblr. For sure Bikini Kill’s “Rebel Girl” and “Feels Blind” would go on there, but I would also want to include some contemporary lady punk, including a song called “Mujer Moderna” by this kick ass San Antonio band called Fea as well as “Dream Number Nine” by a UK band called Big Joanie.

San Antonio band FEA

UK band Big Joanie

Moxie by Jennifer Mathieu: The Review 

From the book flap:

 MOXIE GIRLS FIGHT BACK!

Vivian Carter is fed up. Fed up with a school administration at her small-town Texas high school that thinks the football team can do no wrong. Fed up with sexist dress codes, hallway harassment, and gross comments from guys during class. But most of all, Viv Carter is fed up with always following the rules.

Viv’s mom was a tough-as-nails, punk rock Riot Grrrl in the ’90s, and now Viv takes a page from her mother’s past and creates a feminist zine that she distributes anonymously to her classmates. She’s just blowing off steam, but other girls respond. As Viv forges friendships with other young women across the divides of cliques and popularity rankings, she realizes that what she has started is nothing short of a girl revolution.

Moxie is a book about high school life that will make you wanna riot!

Overall: There are times when the problems of the world seem too big to handle. Climate change, racism, politics…Problems- so, so BIG. Me- SO, SO small! To stop myself from sliding into depression and retreating to my bedroom with a quart of gelato, I  remind myself that no problem, no matter the size, gets solved with inaction and even a small act creates momentum, the opposite of inertia. MOXIE is that reminder. Moxie proves that small acts can lead to BIG change. Alright ladies-go read this book, then go change the world!

Judge a Book by its Cover: Black, white, pink and pissed! The Moxie cover fits the book’s vibe perfectly.

Me Talk Pretty: Jennifer pretty much channeled me at 17 while writing Vivian. This quote especially sums up my high school experience.

Audiobook Narration:  Audiophiles, you’re in luck. Moxie will be available as an audiobook on September 19th and the reader is audiobook veteran  Suzy Johnson.

Kick-Ass Factor: The Kick-Ass factor for Moxie is high! Don’t get me wrong, this is not a book about a girl who suddenly finds out she’s got secret martial arts skills and starts challenging bullies in hand to hand combat. No, Moxie kicks ass in a way that is real, believable and accessible to anyone. Vivian just gets fed up with the misogynist status quo at school and she decides to do something about it. It’s not something that would be considered overly grand or reckless to everyone, but for meek Vivian, it’s huge. And from her one act of defiance, the Moxie movement is born.

Body Count: While this is not a book with a literal body count, there are definitely casualties.

The Chosen One: The plot of Moxie could have slipped into the cliché if not for the skillful writing of Jennifer Mathieu. Moxie is Vivian’s story, but this is not one girl against the world. There are other girls in this book who are fighting their own battles in their own ways.  Moxies girls fight back, but there are consequences.

Just. Why. One thing I couldn’t understand was Vivian’s love for frozen dinners. Please Vivian, stop with the Stouffer’s!

He Said/She Said: Moxie is told from the perspective of Vivian, a girl who does a lot to go unnoticed. She’s smart, but afraid to speak out in class. She clever, but doesn’t want to draw attention to herself. She’s got ideas, good ones, but she’s too scared to voice them. Vivian’s inner dialogue proves this girl has a voice, she just needs to learn to use it.

Bizarre Love Triangle: Jennifer introduces the sort of love triangle that is way more common in real life than the usual YA trope: The Platonic Love Triangle. It’s easy to feel pulled in two different directions when a new friend threatens to shake-up the friend equilibrium between you and your old school bestie. Especially when the new friend is a badass girl from the big city with all kinds of subversive ideas. Is there room in Viv’s life for old friends and new ideas?

Don’t Believe the Hype: When Amy Poehler endorses your book and wants to turn it into a movie, the bar is set pretty damn high.  And for me personally as a self proclaimed Riot Grrl, this particular bar was 20 feet above eye level. But Moxie is worth all the praise it’s receiving. ALL. OF. IT.

Open tab/Last call: Jennifer Mathieu proves that Moxie Girls can be both gentle and tough. This is why the perfect Moxie drink is Fortified Lemon- sweet and sour with a hidden kick! We’ll keep the punch bowl full for you, Jennifer!

Moxie by Jennifer Mathieu, Roaring Brook Press, 336 Pages, September 19, 2017

Ann-Eliza

First Reads Friday Presents: MOXIE by Jennifer Mathieu, Author Interview + Review MOXIE is more than just a book, it's a call to action! We talk all things Riot Grrl, music and our misspent youth with author Jennifer Mathieu.

[keepyourpantsongohan]

Ayesha Liveblogs Magi: Adventure of Sinbad S1

Oh my god Sinbad’s birth is being sensed throughout the world 

I didn’t really realize that Hakuei was that much older than Sinbad (unless that’s her mum?)

“His name is Sinbad, Future Overlord of the Seven Seas” is that really how you described your newborn baby 

This man is taking sailing advice from his two-year-old 

“I can help out if you just let me try” what a sweet little boy I’m sure his life is about to go terribly awry 

I have bad vibes about this war-hero-turned-village outcast narrative it has historically ended sadly in everything else I’ve watched

“Why’s your hair yellow? That’s really weird!” Sinbad talks a lot of shit for a kid whose hair is purple

Holy yikes this narrative took quite a turn 

“We don’t want to get mixed up in your problems” why does nobody in this universe care about children like at all 

I’m actually glad that Badr stabbed him that dude deserved it  

“On your feet” He’s only got one foot I’m pretty sure 

“Please don’t open without permission” Ddfjhkjdhfkjh I love Yunan and his ridiculous cleavage 

Also what is it with Magi and hiding inside barrels of fruit??

The fact that Sinbad and his mum still take people in after they were betrayed my heart and soul <3 

@ Sinbad just ignoring all his problems until they come to punch him in the face.... same 

Dragul has Laxus’s voice and Freed’s gay ass aesthetic 

Yikes @ Yunan creating something called the Hole of Death you done fucked up you woodland twink

“I’m fairly certain my older brothers wouldn’t have had this kind of duty” “I’d watch what I say inside the castle walls if I were you” DRAGUL CAUGHT MONOLOGUING LMAO 

Maybe declare your treason after you’ve captured the dungeon Sinbad

“Once you’ve acquired the power of a dungeon, what will you become?” if the other series are to be believed: Devious

I gotta say that Dragul (Drakon?) had one of the best introductions I’ve ever seen 

“What the hell’s so bad about not wanting to die? It’s not embarrassing! It’s normal!” Baby Sinbad speaking the truth 

Lmao @ this montage of Drakon falling in love with Sinbad in the dungeon

No offense to Drakon but I don’t really care that much about his crush on his sister-in-law like Sinbad is trying to protect an entire kingdom of abused citizens 

“This is a gift, from me to you,” said Yunan, before throwing Sinbad through the air like a football

Damn I should’ve known that everything was about to get sad 

Fhlghjljhljhlfdjhl love this boy with a playful but antagonistic relationship with the nobility 

Jafar!!!! We’re finally gonna meet him as a baby (also the age of everyone makes it seem like Sinbad is a lot older than I thought he was like he’s 14 now and Alibaba’s probably just about to be born or a toddler)

Poor Hina he doesn’t have the heart to tell his sister that Sinbad took down the abare narwhal 

“I want to visit every country, so I can change the world” my boy <3 

“Kids like this one require discipline” I’m laughing at Sinbad trying to parent Jafar because he can’t be more than like 3-4 years younger than him lmao 

On a scale of Alibaba to Jafar how well do you deal with empathy 

I bet Jafar still screams “I’m gonna kill him someday” on a daily basis 

Ngl it took me googling a picture of the Eight Generals to realize where all of this friendship is headed 

“Don’t waste your time on a small fry” said the literal pre-teen Jafar

So what I’m gathering is that Jafar’s assassin tribe are a bunch of demons

That was quite literally a cheap shot Drakon 

Sinbad showing his devious side by tricking all the dungeon capturers into teamwork what an adorable sneak

“Sinbad’s passion has reawakened my own” that’s gay Hina 

I can’t believe that Sinbad has roused the rukh of every man in this room 

“Monster or human it doesn’t matter, they’re still comrades” SINBAD <3

Barbarossa: I don’t care about my wife but you’re not allowed to like her 

Omg @ Hina calling Sinbad tiny and fragile and “a truly amazing man” in the same sentence 

“If you don’t have a home, I’ll provide it for you” get u a friend like Sinbad

“If I were free, I would’ve made you my master” that’s gay Drakon 

I cannot believe that Drakon was the first person in the world to become a Household Member and he did it without even acknowledging that he and Sinbad were friends now that’s love 

Don’t give alcohol to Jafar, Sinbad, he’s a minor (and for that matter so are you?? What are the alcohol laws in this world)

I can’t believe that Jafar went from a Demonic Assassin to a Cute Little Merchant Boy in the span of one episode my god  

I have to say I’m 300% unsurprised they were immediately duped by the dude who wanted to buy their merchandise on the sly although judging based on his beard it’s Alibaba’s dad which is a weird introduction to the King of Balbaad 

Young Sinbad: I! Love! Merchants! #EmbraceCapitalism 

“You have a composed greed about you” what a backhanded compliment

Oh my god Harun’s got the same little hair floop as Alibaba!!!!!

I can’t decide whether I’m going to like Harun or not he does have a lot of impoverished people in his country after all but he is going to be friends with Sinbad and father to Alibaba

King Rashid’s living his wildest life just throwing bags of money at ambitious 14-year-olds 

“This will be your little brother” I can’t believe Hinahoho and Rurumu are Jafar’s parents

“Have fun playing with your big brother okay?” dghkjfhgkdjfhg I love Jafar and his freakishly large family 

I’m not sure what I love more Jafar becoming a Household Member to save his giant baby brother or Sinbad and his ridiculous bling

“Why not give some thought to publishing your adventure stories as a book?” that’s a little self-congratulatory but fair enough 

I’m super excited for the Land of Purity because I assume there’s going to be some jokes about Sinbad being a hoe

“There’s nobody in our kingdom like you” take a shot every time someone falls in love with Sinbad

I’m very concerned about what will happen to Mystras considering Spartos is the one who eventually joins up with Sinbad like what’s gonna happen to him why isn’t he a general

“I don’t really know who he is” “Well that’s a bummer. I’ve only been watching you this entire time” Yunan admitting to stalking Sinbad 

Seems like Knight-King Darius just brought magic to a sword fight 

Damn Sinbad’s had a wild few episodes he went from magic tricks in a theatre to a full djinn equip destroying mountains good lord

“I think I was just jealous of you” still no excuse for bad parenting Darius

I am deeply concerned for Mystras 

Jafar and Hinahoho’s faces every time Sinbad talks about ladies lmao 

“Men are only here for one thing and that’s to produce our offspring. How can I speak about diplomacy with such barbarians ” me too Queen Mira

“I’m different from other men” [Sinbad voice] I’m not like other girls 

OH NO ARE THEY KEEPING HINAHOHO BECAUSE THEY THINK HE’S STRONG AND VIRILE

Update from ten seconds later: Yes

“Those things that aren’t acceptable to be seen on screen” Jafar breaking the fourth wall for a dick joke 

I love that Sinbad’s noble selflessness lasted about ten seconds 

Jesus Christ what a little demon boy Jafar ripping apart a snake with his bare hands

How much time is passing Rurumu come collect your husband and your idiot boys you’ve got children to raise 

“Balalark Meat!” jghkfdjhgkjdfh Sinbad stop this 

“Women are such dependable goddesses” me too Artemyran man

What kind of Inuyasha ass equip is this these cat ears and fluffy tails

“I did nothing wrong. I did nothing wrong” OH NO HINAHOHO 

I’m real surprised they did not see the red-light district thing coming 

Oh my god Pisti being held by Sinbad was the cutest thing in the world I want him to take care of all the babies 

“By the way ladies, Mystras here is single” what a lad Sinbad is wingmanning his homie from the moment he arrives

[holaafrica]

I call out its complicity in the unjust treatment endured by queer folks, which vary from one geographical location to the next, from one religion to the next or from one denomination to the next. Sadly, I do this much to the chagrin of queer folks who are religious. http://holaafrica.org/2017/09/13/religion-is-complicit-in-homophobia-what-i-wish-theist-lgbt-folks-understood/

Religion is complicit in homophobia: What I Wish Theist LGBT+ Folks Understood

By Joyline Maenzanise

I was born into Christianity; my mother was one of those people who went to church religiously and that way of living was instilled in us from a very young age. I became aware of my attraction towards women in my late teens. At that time, I did not take the feelings seriously; I did not even think they might mean anything more than just fleeting feelings. I was too busy trying to fit into the heteronormative standards which always felt like a taxing competition with other women for the attention of men. Patriarchy! How could I, anyway? Zimbabwe is a generally homophobic country; homosexuality is illegal and it is demonised.

In my early twenties, my attraction towards women became more pronounced and hard to ignore. This started bothering me, especially as someone who was still a Christian. I knew what the Bible says about my sexuality; I had heard it preached about in church or on television. On top of that, I had already had a deacon at the church I once was part of tell me that I was possessed by a male demon. I’m not sure if this was because of my sartorial choices; I wore (women’s) pants a lot.

I began to pray about this; I believe I was praying the gay away.

Still, those feelings for women never went away. At that time, I took that as a sign from the deity. I could be with whoever I wanted to be with. I had moved from Zimbabwe to South Africa when all this was happening.

Accepting my own sexuality has been both a liberating experience and a burden. Being queer made it hard for me to attend the church that I had been going to (His People Church). I remember one sermon where the pastor had even preached against homosexuality. To be honest, I don’t think there’s any other thing that is condemned by these pastors (and other religious person) as much as homosexuality, even though the Bible is filled with many other ‘deplorable’ actions. Anyway, I began to feel more and more out of place and eventually I just stopped going to church.

Being busy with studies also made it easier for me to leave. I was still religious though; sometimes my mentor invited me to her church (I have forgotten the name but it just happened to be a few blocks away from His People). It was great that they welcomed everyone regardless of sexual orientation but I did not feel at home in that place. Maybe I felt uncomfortable with being one of the very few Black members or it could have been the absence of the upbeat vibe that I had loved about my previous church. It just didn’t feel homey, despite being LGBT+ friendly.

I have since dissociated myself from religion.

Though my sexuality is not the reason for this, it certainly is one of the major reasons why I will stay as far away as I can from religion. The move has been, somewhat, freeing because being constantly bombarded with verses that speak against my existence or how I am doomed to an afterlife of suffering in hell no longer sends shivers running down my spine. I’m not even bothered by that!  Right now, I am more concerned about my happiness and living my life (this life) unfettered. Like I always say lately, hell, it if does exist, can wait!

Marriage, family and coming out

I came out to my familyin January 2014. I decided to tell them because I wanted them to know that if I ever mentioned marriage, they would know better than to expect any dowry because I wouldn’t be bringing home a man. I know some queer women follow the tradition of paying dowry to the partner’s family but I have told myself that I will not allow heteronormative practices to worm their way into my life as a queer person. I will not allow how I relate to my partner to be informed by any patriarchal/ cis-heteronormative standards.

I came out to my siblings and aunt (our parents have passed on) in an email because we all live in different places and I just couldn’t wait for when we would all be together. Judging by the current state of our relationships, I don’t know if that will ever happen. Honestly, it was better and safer for me to do it that way because even though I didn’t know what their reaction would be, I anticipated the worst given our religious upbringing and the patriarchal violence that marred memories of growing up together.

I struggled to even come up with the right words to use.

Luckily, I had a queer friend from college who, after I confided in her, told me how she had gone about it with her family. She was fortunate to have an accepting family. That wasn’t the case with me (or many other queer folks). My younger siblings and oldest niece reassured me that all was good. While some siblings chose not to say anything, some said that this was hard for them to accept just like it was hard for me to let them know. My oldest brother decided to send a long sermon on how homosexuality is a sin and that I needed to be saved. It was too long so I merely skimmed through it.  After a few days, he sent he another email checking to find out what decision I had made after his ‘oh-so-loving advice’. I ignored him and every other hurtful email he has thought to send afterwards. It was, and still is, clear that some siblings thought I was seeking their approval when I told them about my sexuality. I didn’t want their blessings; I was merely letting them know.

Preparing them for the possible future.

Since coming out, I have had to deal with a brother who believes I am suffering because I am gay. He seems to have deluded himself into believing that there is no gay person on the face of this earth who is happy and living a fulfilling life. He has even suggested that I find a pastor to help pray for me in a misguided attempt at some form of conversion therapy.

‘Stay away from gay people’, that’s what he’s also told me.

To add to the pain, my mother’s sister sent me a video of an ‘ex-lesbian’ who is now in a heterosexual relationship, apparently in hopes to let me know that I too can change if I am willing to denounce my sexuality and allow the Holy Spirit to change me. Like geez, give a human a break!

Homophobia disguised as love

Some people have said all the reactions from relatives are coming from a place of love. I call bullshit on that. Someone who loves me will accept me the way I am. If there is one thing I have learnt from experience, it is that, sometimes, people give advice not out of concern for another person or their well-being, but because they want to ensure that that person does not step outside of what’s considered ‘normal’ or acceptable and therefore, does not embarrass them or ruin their reputation in any way (by association or relation).

Since dissociating myself from Christianity, I am no longer afraid to question religion. I do not censor myself when talking about religion. I criticise it as the system on which many oppressive systems (which many of us call out with so much rigor) are predicated. I call out its complicity in the unjust treatment endured by queer folks, which vary from one geographical location to the next, from one religion to the next or from one denomination to the next. Sadly, I do this much to the chagrin of queer folks who are religious. I find it really disheartening and very ironic. Before deciding to do otherwise, I would expend so much of my energy questioning the intolerance towards the LGBT+ community of these institutions, being fully cognizant of the Biblical principles they use to justify their stance. I would question these teachings in much the same I criticise the way the Bible seems to glorify suffering or devalue women. Personally, I am not bothered that some religious institutions won’t accept queer folks because I’m not religious. I don’t want to be in those spaces! I don’t want to force myself into spaces where I am not wanted. However, I cannot afford to ignore the intolerance of religion because it is those exclusionary, discriminatory beliefs tend to find their way into other aspects of our lives thus posing a huge risk to the livelihoods of queer folks. My own queerness does not afford me the luxury to disregard this. Sanctimonious sacrosanct

I know I am not the only queer person who criticises religion or expresses their anger at it. People have legitimate reasons for their anger and sadly, this anger often goes dismissed as offensive by those who follow religious practices. I’ve had one queer guy tell me to never talk to him again after I posted a Facebook post expressing my anger at God. Mind you, he felt justified enough to express his intolerance at my anger towards his God (whom he believes is too sacrosanct to be questioned, let alone despised) even when he didn’t even know or bother to understand why I was angry. To top it all off, this was the reaction coming from a queer individual who is in the closet and uses a pseudonym on Facebook. He is in the closet online and offline. Ask yourself- why would someone be in the closet, despite attempts by some folks to convince them that ‘coming out’ isn’t necessary?

Fear. Deep down, the cause of that fear stems from religion. Still, some of these folks defend it and the deities they deem to be ‘loving’.

It is not my desire to strip anyone of their autonomy when it comes to choosing whether to subscribe to any religion or not. I would just appreciate it if queer folks who are religious would be aware of how religion continues to shape other people’s realities. Just because your religious institution has accepted you or you believe your God loves you the way you are, whether you are ‘out’ or in the closet does not mean you get to stifle other people’s anger towards how oppressive religion really is. Some religious institutions are less dogmatic and some queer folks are only fortunate to be part of such institutions. The same cannot be said about those queer folks who have been (or risk being) murdered, those who have been ostracised by their families or communities, those who have lost their jobs or failed to land that job, those who have resorted to (or have considered or consider) ending their own lives, those who now suffer from some mental illness because of the trauma induced by living in a society whose hate or intolerance is justified by religion.

If you have a family that believes in a deity or deities and loves you for who you are, good for you. If your church welcomes ALL, good for you. You are one of the privileged few.

There are other posts about religion and homophobia including this one about how God Loves Gay people and this one about accepting yourself as a queer christian. There are also ones about coming out such as this guide that has helpful tips and also one about how staying in the closet can be an act of self care and preservation. 

*leave a comment on the post, you can write it under a different name and your email will not be published.*

To submit to HOLAA! email submissions@holaafrica.org

[laurentsbitch]

Q&A

Have you ever had a controlling boyfriend/girlfriend?
Never. Have you ever written a love letter to someone as a joke?
No. Who would even think of that? How many true heart breaks have you had in your lifetime?
One. Everyone has a been a lesson though. Who last grabbed your ass?
My damn self. Do you get a ‘Good Morning’ text from someone every day?
As if. Do you have any gay family members?
I do. Where did you get the shirt you are wearing?
Primark pyjamas ✌🏼 Do you feel like everything is falling apart around you?
Not so much right now. I've recently picked myself up and dusted myself off. Things are good rn. Was your first kiss romantic?
No. I was 13. It was in a garage under a blanket. Do you know anybody whose last name is a color?
Yes. What are you most likely to go to jail for? Drunk and disorderly? Assault, possibly. Do you ever feel like life is going by too fast?
All the damn time. Who was the last person to sleep over at your house?
Gemma. Is there someone that always intimidates you?
I will never let any bitch or any man intimidate me. Have you ever liked anyone that was in a relationship with someone else?
Oh yeah. Would you ever get a boob job?
It is on my list of things to do. Did your last relationship end because of you or the other person?
I actually ended it but we both played equal parts. Do you ever ignore texts from some people?
yeah, people I don't wanna talk to. Have you ever tried to break up anyone because YOU liked the guy/girl?
I've never tried, I'm not that malicious. When is the last time you felt left out?
Recently. My two besties are all loved up and then there's me. I'm gettin money tho. When was the last time you flirted with someone?
I have a really flirty personality, so I'd flirt with my cereal. Yellowcard vs Straylight Run, pick:
Means fuck all to me that. What would you think if you found out your ex was gay?
I'd be shocked but whatever makes him happy. Would you ever take someone back if you found out they cheated on you?
I don’t know. Every situation is differently and people have their reasons for cheating. I don't think everyone who cheats is a bad person nor will they continue to cheat on their future partners but there's clearly issues that need addressing in the relationship if someone cheats. What does your last text message say?
”Iona's going to bed x.” What color is your hair right now?
Medium brown. I think I'm gonna get it ombred though before I go on holiday. Do people ever compliment your eyes? Quite a lot actually. Have you ever lied to your boyfriend/girlfriend?
Yes. Do people ever tell you that you’re funny?
Yeah, I'm hysterical. Would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn?
I do the same thing, so no. How many people has your best friend had sex with?
12/13 - I think. What’s the last song you listened to?
'Low Life' - Future ft. The Weeknd. Who’s the last person that hung up on you?
Probably Britt. Are you a bitch?
Yes. Four days from now, will you have sex?
I wish 🙄. Do you look intimidating?
I don't think I do. What does your second to last text say?
"On our way back x". What makes you laugh?
My life. What were you most looking forward to today?
A lie in and some sun. The sun was gone by 1pm though. How is your hair?
It needs washing. What are your initials?
NAT. What’s your biggest fear?
I have a lot. Death, being alone, failure. Look outside how’s the weather?
Cloudy, it was nice and sunny this morning though. Did you ever think someone didn’t like you, but come to find out they really did?
No. It tends to be the other way around with me. When was the last time you had a conversation with an ex?
A week ago. Are you worried about anything right now?
Not right now. How do you think tomorrow will be?
As good as a Monday can be. A little bit easier knowing that it's a 4 day week 💃🏽. Do you wish you could take one thing back?
I try to live with no regrets but of course I do. Is there a guy who knows everything or almost everything about you?
There was a lad who knew almost everything. Now I'd say he knows nothing. If you could pack your bags right now and were given a plane ticket, where do you go?
LA. Have you ever given anyone more than three chances?
I barely give people one. How far away are you from the person you have feelings for?
Like 45 minutes. Your last ex calls wanting to hangout, what do you say?
I'd say yeah. Where were you at 2 this morning?
In bed watching 13 Reasons Why. Have you ever kissed anyone who’s name started with a K?
I don't actually think so. Possibly. Probably. Have you accidentally sent a text to the wrong person?
Yeah and accidentally, on purpose. Last time you were TOTALLY happy?
A few days ago. Could you go the rest of your life without drinking alcohol?
No way. Ever given your all to someone who walked away?
Every. Single. Time. Have you ever done your makeup in class?
Nah, wouldn't leave the house without it on. Is there anything currently hurting on your body?
Nope. How old were you when you stopped sleeping with a night light?
An actual night light - probably 10/11. I used to sleep with the TV on after that. Ever kissed someone with green eyes?
Probably. Are you a jealous person?
I try not to be and I tell myself that I'm not but people give you reasons to be. Always trust your instincts. When you are home alone, do you still close the door when you shower?
Yeah. Are you mad at anyone right now?
Nope. Positive vibes only. Do you like your music loud or at a reasonable level?
Loud, what's the point otherwise. Is there anyone you wish you could be spending time with right now?
Of course. Have you held hands with anyone in the past 30 hours?
My baby sister. Do you have a friend named Ashley?
I do not. How often do you sleep in?
Weekends. Will you be in a relationship next month?
99.999999% sure I won't. Do you stay up later than ten o’clock on a week night?
No. Who’s the last person you told a secret to?
I don't actually know. I don't have many secrets. Have you met someone in the last year who turned out to be amazing?
Yes and I'm grateful for them all coming into my life. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
Probably not. Do you miss anyone?
Not really. Would you rather have big or small dogs? I do not judge. Any size dog would be welcomed with open arms. Will you cry tonight?
Nahhh. Do you have respect for people even if you don’t like them?
Of course. Usually they act disrespectful. What’s one fruit you love in drinks?
Lemon. What was the most people you ever tripped in front of? A few people in club probably. Have you ever tried wine?
Yes, love it 😍. Can heartbreak happen all at once, or over a long period of time?
Heartbreak takes so many forms. In your life, do you plan on visiting other countries?
I have visited a few and I plan on visiting a whole lot more. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?
I think it depends on the person and the circumstances. But nothing more than a second chance. Is there an ex you want to make up with?
I'm on good terms with the ones I wanna be in good terms with. Do you take compliments well?
Probably too well. Does cuddling freak you out?
No. How much time do you take to get ready in the morning?
About an hour/hour and a half. Do you love where you live?
I do yeah. I'm very proud of my city. What do you label yourself as?
I don’t. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 months from now?
Probably not. Will your next kiss be drunk or sober?
99.99% drunk. Are you a mean person?
No. Do you wear high heels everyday?
Only on a night out. Do you fall asleep texting every night?
Nope. Are you an aunt or an uncle?
I am an aunt to 3 lads. Were you texting someone right before you fell asleep last night?
Nope. Did you have any unread text messages when you woke up today? How many?
Nope. Name someone who made you smile today?
The pizza delivery man. Are you happy?
Yes. I'm generally a happy person. Are you an alcoholic?
No, live a bevy though. Can you go a day without thinking about the person that’s on your mind now?
Yes, to be honest, he's not on my mind that often. Could you go the rest of your life without a cigarette?
Yeah, probably. Does anyone know every little detail about you?
No, I don't think anyone ever would. Does it bother you when someone lies to you?
Of course. I don't see the point. I'm very open minded so I don't think there's a need. What’s one thing you really want right now?
Pizza. Who all do you have texts from in your phone?
I keep all my texts. Who do you trust most as of now?
Me, myself & I. Who was the last person you took a picture with?
My sister, Britt. Do you have a younger sister?
I have 2 younger sisters. Did anything “cute” happen today?
My baby sister sat in the sun, playing her guitar and singing The Beatles. Are you wearing shoes right now?
Nope, I'm in bed. Have you ever just laid outside and looked at the stars?
Yeah, I love it. Do feet gross you out?
Yeah, they're vile. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos?
Yes!! I was actually gonna go and get one today. Do you smile everyday?
Yes. Who are you more like, mom or dad?
I definitely see both of them in me, but I'd say my mum. Could you date someone shorter than you?
Probably not. Where do you wish you were right now?
Ibiza. Have a crazy side?
Oh yeah. Something you do a lot?
Work, eat. Angry at anyone?
Nope. Describe your life in one word?
Content. Who was the last person who gave you a hug?
Iona. What is your natural hair color?
Medium brown. How many people have you kissed?
Hahaha, countless. How many of those did you make out with?
All of them. Ever kissed someone you weren’t dating at the time?
Yeah. Ever kissed someone you’d met less than an hour before?
Yeah. Of the people you’ve kissed, how many do you regret kissing?
None really. Were any of them in relationships with someone else at the time?
Yes. How old was the oldest person you’ve kissed?
I'm not entirely sure. How young was the youngest person you’ve kissed?
He's 20, I'm 22. Ever been kissed by a legal adult when you were a minor (or vise-versa)?
Nope. Ever been kissed by someone you didn’t want to kiss?
Yes. Ever been walked in on while you were making out with someone?
Yeah, that doesn't really bother me though. By your parents?:
I don't think so. Weirdest place you’ve kissed someone? Don't think I've ever kissed someone in a weird place. Ever kissed someone and had someone else get really mad about it?
Oh yes. Ever stopped kissing someone because they had bad breath?
Yeah. Ever not known the name of someone you kissed?
Yeah. Ever kissed someone on a dare/as part of a game?
Yeah. Kissed someone you didn’t really like just to make someone else jealous?
Um, not really. Ever had a really horrible kissing experience?
Oh yes. Ever been called a bad kisser?
No, not to my face anyway 😂. Ever called someone else a bad kisser?
Yup. Where’s the most public place you’ve ever made out with someone?
A club, park, town. Where’s the most private place you’ve ever made out with someone?
My bedroom. Ever kissed some out of pity just so they would stop badgering you?
Yeah. Ever kissed someone just to forget about someone else?
Yep. Ever thought of someone else while you were kissing someone?
Yeah. Do you usually kiss on the first date?
Yeah, I think a kiss is fine on a first date.