#it feels like very un-human body language

[servicereward]

Model Sheets for Animators, Disney's Gargoyles (1994)

Demona

[webshooterrr9]

merman diary

[TRANSLATED INTO ENGLISH FOR HUMAN CONSUMPTION. ORIGINAL WRITING IN THE LOCAL LANGUAGE OF THE MERFOLK]

w.c: 0.6k

content warning: none (yet)

Diary Entry - 10/15/24

I swam further from the colony than I should’ve the other day. But I don’t regret it. I moved my way swiftly through the deep sea towards the land. I had never been up there - nor had anyone I knew. Growing up, I heard tales of what happened to us when we made contact with the land. Large, monstrous creatures, with rough hands and jagged teeth, were up there lurking. You could sense them coming; with their loud roars and deadly stench, it was advised to stay as clear away from the dry land as possible - these were not creatures you’d want to meet. I had seen glimpses of these creatures on large vehicles that floated on the surface of the water, cutting through the currents. But the vehicles were far too grand for me to see over the sides - I had only gotten a peek of these barbarians.

However, I’ve always been the curious sort. My peers would describe me as a troublemaker - but mischief was never my passion. I simply wanted to learn, and I see no reason why I shouldn’t. Besides, I know what I’m doing. I’m strong, I can handle myself out there. And yet, no amount of hunting or sparring or exploration could prepare me for what I saw that day.

I encountered an alien. At first, only seeing her top half, I thought she was one of us. A lost mermaid stranded on the beach. I rushed over, ready to warn her of the dangers of the land, of the treacherous monsters that lived up there, until I saw her fully. She was no mermaid, no creature of the sea at all. Rather than a nimble tail, there were two long limbs attached to the bottom of her hips - crossed over each other while she sat. Her skin was a shade somewhere between the most blinding white and purest black - evening out to a beautiful earthy tone in the middle. She was a mix of tans and browns, with her eyes darker than her skin and her hair darker than her eyes. In terms of color, the girl was very plain - but that made her all the more special in my eyes. She looked as if she sprung from the land, letting the soil of the Earth paint her body on her way up from her roots in the ground. Land. Soil. Earth. All things that I had never seen before. Her body was a mix of textures. She had skin like mine, but un-littered with scales that aid a smooth glide through the water. Her hair seemed to be soft like mine as well, but it flowed longer than any hair that sprouted from merfolk heads. And there were accessories on her;  large fabrics made of cotton and leather draped across her frame, shielding most of her body from the surrounding elements. Oh, she was gorgeous, wasn’t she? Truly a remarkable creature. I was so blessed to meet her on that day.

I know I shouldn’t. I know it’s dangerous. But I want to see her again. I know there are evil creatures up there, but she wasn’t one of them. And if someone like her, who looked so fragile, was able to lounge around alone with no worry, I assumed that all was safe. I wonder what her species is like. Are they all solitary, or did she wander off just like I did? Was she even a female, or was my perception skewed based on my experience with my own people? If this gorgeous bipedal creature is common up on land, I must return soon. I promise myself that I will steer clear from the monsters, but I cannot contain my interest in this new world. I must go back. I will return tomorrow. I hope she is there.

a/n: will update this whenever i feel like it. no regular schedule set. technically its oc!merman x oc!afab human, but you can interpret it as whatever you want. no actual names for the characters so it can be reader x your fav character

dividers by @cafekitsune

[itsnotbird]

Orphic ~ File 1

Orphic (adj.); mysterious and entrancing beyond ordinary understanding

Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

Non-Canon

Summary: The last thing he needs is for his mundane life to get more complicated when something- you -seemingly fall out of the sky and change everything.

Warning: Grumpy Bucky, language, talks of powers

“You need to start putting yourself out there.”

She had no clue what she was talking about. Weeks and weeks of going to sessions and Bucky was still convinced that Dr. Raynor was crazy.

He disects her former statement, like he’s done ever since she said it, and he makes his way down the street.

Usually, he’d be on his way to his apartment, the one that he moved in to after he started this whole ‘healing journey’ thing. Dr. Raynor suggested it, she suggests everything in his life now it seems. And because he is mandated to attend the therapy sessions, he does the bare minimum just to please her. That’s why he has an almost empty apartment, away from the upstate Avengers compound. Tonight though, he has someone to meet up with.

In the sushi bar, he greets the old man that has become somewhat of a friend to him. Yori orders the same thing he always does, then asks Bucky if he’s ever going to ask the pretty waitress out or if he’s still scared.

Bucky sighs. “Always so hard on me.” He jokes.

The man chuckles. “You’re wasting time, you’ll understand when you get old like me.”

Bucky smiles. “Technically, I’m older than you but that’s a different conversation.”

And the two bicker back and forth in a light hearted manner until Bucky pays for the meal and they leave the restaurant.

“I’m taking the long way back.” Bucky says to the man. “You alright to get home?”

Yori grumbles and waves him off. “Don’t worry about me.” He says, complaining that Bucky was over bearing.

Chuckling to himself, Bucky cuts down an alley and takes the long way back to his apartment. Fresh rain starts to hit the pavement so he tends to stick to the sidewalk that is covered by awnings. The mist gets caught in the street lights, making everything have a certain glow. There’s only a bit of chatter from shop owners closing up, but it’s rather deserted as he goes.

In his pocket, his phone rings. He knows it’s Steve, he chooses to ignore it as he gets caught in his thoughts. In truth, he’s been avoiding everyone’s calls. If his shrink knew, she’d scold him and tell him he’s self sabotaging again. That’s why he doesn’t tell her.

The rain comes down harder now, it hits the black street and splashes onto his boots that lay against the sidewalk.

Some sort of eery feeling chills his spine. Looking over his shoulder, he scans the buildings around him, looks at windows and in the air. Continuing to walk as he searches for potential threats, he turns the corner.

His gaze flicks down.

Feet away from him, there’s a shape in the street.

It isn’t fully illuminated, just a collapsed form.

He proceeds further with caution until he can make out what his eyes see.

You lay there on your side, soaked to the bone.

“Shit.” He exclaims, rushing into the heavy drizzle.

There’s no one around, no cars, no sign of why you’re there. On his knees now, he rolls your limp form over, laying you on your back.

“Can you hear me? Wake up.” He gently shakes you.

Scanning your body for any visible injuries, he finds none. His two fingers pressed to your neck, he feels the very faint thump of your pulse.

More panicked now, he calls out, trying to get your eyes to snap open.

Were you hit by a car?

Did you have internal injuries?

He gently cradles the back of your head with one hand, and the other peels an eyelid open, hoping to check how dilated your pupils are. Your thick lashes separate, what greets him isn’t a sign of a concussion, it’s the bright glow of blue, something abnormal that scares him.

“Jesus!” He gasps and pulls back swiftly, seeing the almost un-human eye looking at him.

Your eyes shut again, he picks up the arm that rested on your stomach and the bundle of veins in your wrist are the same strobing glow of blue.

This was something different than a pedestrian crisis.

He scans the area carefully once more, making sure there are no onlookers as he decides what to do next.

He should call an ambulance.

But this isn’t a civilian medical issue, it seems.

Gently, he scoops your frame into his arms.

Both completely drenched now, he carries you back to his dry apartment. The whole time, he’s cursing himself. This is going to be a mess, he just knew it would. Maybe he should drop you off in front of a fire department and leave it at that?

He doesn’t. Of course he doesn’t.

Instead, he manages to get you inside without raising any suspicion.

He lays you on the kitchen counter, not caring about the puddles of water the two of you have made on the floor.

The heels of his palms dig into his eyes and he groans.

This was so stupid.

So, so, stupid.

Looking down at the screen of his cellphone, he debates just who to call. Steve can’t keep a secret, Tony was a definite no.

Sam Wilson.

Bucky huffs, then places the call. Maybe he can just pin this issue onto him and move on with life? Yeah, that was a good idea.

He’s very vague when Sam answers.

“There’s something you need to see, it might be important.”

Sam groans. “Oh, great. I got scared you accidentally made me your booty call.” He says with dry sarcasm.

“A what?” Bucky asks in confusion.

“Nothing, the joke’s only funny if you’re competent.” Sam states. “I’ll be over in ten minutes.”

And just like that, Bucky’s left in silence.

He watches you with a cocked head, curious. You don’t move, your chest barely rises and falls as you take shallow breaths.

Once he’s sure you’re not going to move, he changed out of his soaked clothes and grabs a towel. Coming back to you, he cautiously dries your face, staring down at you, seeing if you flinch at all. Softly, he reaches for your hand that dangles off the counter.

As his fingers make contact with your palm, a jolt of what feels like electricity shoots through him. He teeth grit and he lets out a strangled shout, he can pin point every nerve that gets shot.

He jerks himself away, panting hard as he shakes for a moment.

“Well, you have a defense mechanism.” He says to you.

A knock comes from the door.

“I swear, don’t be wasting my time, Barnes.” Sam warns right as the door is opened, letting him into the space.

“Would you stop being a pain before I regret calling you?” Bucky snaps, shutting the door.

“Care to show me why you called me? I paused Law&Order for this shit.”

Pushing past the urge to make fun of him, Bucky just wordlessly points to the kitchen.

It takes entirely too long for Sam to go in and notice, but when he does, he isn’t calm about it.

“What the hell?!” He shouts. “Who is this?”

Bucky shrugs. “No clue.”

“No clue? Where’d you find her? Why is she here? …Did you kill her?”

He shoots Sam a sharp look. “No! I didn’t kill her, she’s alive, asshat. I found her in the street, unconscious.”

The man turns from your body to look at Bucky.

“So you just…kidnapped her? Didn’t call the authorities or anything, just took her?” He asks, face etched with disbelief.

Once again, Bucky shrugs. “Finders keepers.”

“Finders keepers!? Bucky you can’t just-”

Fed up with his talking, he strides forward, grabbing your relaxed wrist and showing the discovery to him.

“That look normal to you?” He ask with an angry tone. Sam pauses at the power running through your veins.

“Or this?” Bucky continues. He opens your eyes, revealing the strobe blue that glows wildly, masking your vision.

“…Okay that’s a little strange.” Sam admits, now curious. He scans you with his eyes. “Any idea where she came from?”

Bucky shakes his head. “No one was around, no cars or anything. It’s like she just appeared.”

Cautiously, he feels your pulse just like Bucky had done, then reaches for your hand out of some impulse to comfort.

“Hey don’t-”

Bucky’s words are stopped by the strangled groan that Sam lets rip from his throat. He drops your hand and hot power courses through him.

“I tried to tell you.” Bucky sighs.

As Sam tries to pull himself together, shaking his hands out. “Yeah, that’s not normal.”

“And this is why I called you.” Bucky says.

After a moment of processing, Sam speaks. “We have to take her into the compound.”

“Stark’s gonna be pissed if we bring a strange woman into the compound while everyone is asleep.” Bucky expresses, watching as Sam looks through his kitchen drawers.

“We need to figure out what’s wrong with her. The MedBay is where she needs to be.” He says, finding a pair of oven mitts that Bucky wasn’t aware he had.

Sam carefully slides them onto your hands, then grabs a roll of duct tape and tapes them securely around your wrists, assuring they don’t come off. He nods at his work, happy at his genius idea and then turns to Bucky with a smile. He motions to you with a ‘huh, you like?’ expression, expecting praise.

All he gets is a blank stare.

“Okay, super soldier, grab her and let’s go.” Sam says in a disappointed tone.

There was no reason to argue, so with a sigh, Bucky picks you up once more and lays you over his shoulder. Your wet hair hangs and sways as he leaves the apartment, following Sam to the parking garage where his car was. Like a rag doll, you’re easily laid in the back seat. Sam makes sure your feet aren’t caught as he shuts the door.

The ride over was mostly silent, and in the rearview mirror, Bucky stares at your limp frame.

“Which of the big three do you think she is?” Sam asks, breaking up the silence.

“The what?” Bucky finally looks away.

“You know, the big three. Androids, aliens and wizards…it’s what we always end up fighting.” He explains like it was just a common thing to say.

Bucky pinches the bridge of his nose. “God, I hate when you talk.”

Sam glares. “Oh I’m sorry, I forgot I was just supposed to drive in awkward silence while there’s an unconscious girl in my backseat. You called me to help and I’m not allowed to ask questions?” He says with a raised tone, aggravating Bucky.

“Why ask me the questions? I don’t know what she is- something obviously serious enough to electrocute us.” He states, looking out the rainy window.

Sam grumbles. “She might be all three.” He says more to himself.

“How can she be an android and an alien?” Bucky questions.

“It’s possible!”

The two argue about the possibility, that’s before Sam hits his breaks at a red light and your body rolls off the seat and onto the floor. It makes a thud sound, causing them both to look back.

“Great, now you gave her head trauma.” Bucky throws his hands up.

- - - -

They thought that sneaking into the compound would be easy, given that they have unlimited clearance. But as they enter the silent environment, you still laid over Bucky’s shoulder, they space the fact that the entire compound is run by an AI who’s far too smart.

“Welcome, Mr. Wilson and Mr. Barnes.” FRIDAY greets as they sneak into the MedBay.

They jump at the voice.

“Should I wake Mr. Stark?” It asks, making them both protest and claim that wasn’t necessary.

Bucky lays you on the medical bed.

“It appears there is a guest without clearance to be in here, this is a serious security breach.” FRIDAY continues.

“No, we give her permission.” Sam says, going to strap you down, just in case.

“I’m afraid Mr. Stark can only give permission. I will wake him.”

“No! Don’t wake him.” Bucky grunts, wheeling a monitor over. “Do. Not. Wake. Him.”

The two of them do their best to hook you up to it, but eventually they get confused about wires and what goes where.

“We can’t clip it to her finger, she has mitts on for a reason.” Sam says, attaching wires to all the wrong places.

The MedBay doors slide open, making them jump away from you. An angry looking Tony walks in. Robe and slippers, he’s obviously been stirred moments before.

“I’m only going to ask you idiots this one time, so don’t waste your chance. Why is FRIDAY telling me there’s unauthorized personnel in my building?” He asks, stopping in his tracks as he sees you. Immediately, his face changes into one of confusion and curiosity, he approaches you with an almost unsure pace. His eyes soften, seeing your cold skin and wet clothes.

“Barnes, start talking.” He says, coming to undo all the mistakes that were previously done and correctly hooking you up to the machine.

“Why do you assume it’s my fault?” He says, defensively.

“Because it usually is, now start talking.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hi! Welcome to part one of the series! Stick around for more.

File 2

~ Eve

[therealieblog]

A big part of Intuitive Eating involves the de-stigmatizing of food. How do we de-stigmatize food? By not assigning it moral qualities, and by not using derogatory, negative language when we talk about food.

Examples of moralizing, derogatory and negative language we, under diet culture, still use regularly when talking about food:

"Sinful"

"Fattening"

"Unhealthy"

"Deadly"

"Bad for you"

"Clean"

"Pure"

"Healthy"

"Good" "

Junk/Junk food"

"Crap/Crappy"

Words to use instead of: Instead of "Sinful", or "Fattening", use "Decadent", "Rich" or "Delicious". Avocados and dark chocolate and many organic, "healthy" foods will make you fatter if you eat them often enough. Is this really about health? Or is it about fatphobia?

Instead of "Unhealthy", you can just say what it is about the food that impairs your health. "It hurts my stomach," "It makes my skin greasy/makes me break out", "I'm allergic to it" "I feel nauseous when I eat that." That at least is honest. Saying any food that isn't on some diet culture list of approved foods is "unhealthy" is just not scientifically accurate or backed by anything other than fear mongering.

Yes, eating foods high in fat and salt and sugar in large enough quantities, for long enough periods of time can negatively affect your health, but the vast majority of studies done on exactly how it affects your health, do not control for participants' smoking, drinking, drug use, genetic predispositions (genetics makes up a significant portion of health by the way), sedentary lifestyle, exposure to chemicals in the environment, mental health status, or literally anything outside of what they eat, so... yeah... f@ck that.

Ditto with "Bad for you." It's just so formless and un-researched and based in fatphobia. What does that even mean? In what amount is it "bad for you?" would it be equally bad for anyone to eat "unhealthy" foods at any time? Is there a magic threshold past which one's donut consumption goes from infrequent to "bad for you" levels? Or, are human beings a wildly diverse group of people, who all have very different bodies, metabolisms, genetics, tolerances, tastes and needs.

"Clean" is just as bad as "Bad For You", only worse, because it's so moralistic. If food is made out of animals, plants and grains, and is considered edible by human beings, it's fucking clean. Now if you're talking about gross things falling into the food by accident during the process of making it, or if you're talking about pesticides being used on your fruit and vegetables, then I get wanting to make sure the food is "clean". But if you're putting food on some sort of angelic pedestal for being free from sugar, or saturated fats, or carbohydrates, then you are still stuck in diet culture.

Instead of "Junk food", which implies that the food itself is garbage, which is honestly just a horrifying way to think about and talk about food, you could say "play food", "fun food", "snack food". These foods: chips, chocolate, cookies etc. aren't meant to fulfill your nutritional needs. We eat them for enjoyment, or to pick us up when we're blue, to calm us when we're stressed, or just because it tastes good and we like eating it. I think gentle nutrition is important, and paying attention to how food makes you feel is obviously important, but the way we perceive food and talk about food, reinforces what we think of ourselves when we eat it. If we are eating "bad" and "unhealthy" foods, then we are bad and unhealthy people, and that is a mind-fuck, believe me.

I've performed a 25 year longitudinal dieting study on myself. I know what it feels like to absolutely hate myself for what my body tells me it wants to eat. Not fun. So please have a care with the way you speak about food, and the way you look at yourself in relation to food. Food is sustenance and life. It is meant to be enjoyed, not feared. Lets not talk about food as if the thing meant to connect us to life also makes us inherently morally deviant.

[inukag-archive]

Inuvember 2023 Part 1

In honor of @inuvember InuKag Day, the Archive Mods have put together a 30 item InuKag recommendation list: one InuKag fic per prompt. Since this list is longer than our usual, we've split it into two parts. Enjoy!

Day 1 Inuyasha

I Hate That Fucking Well by @kstewdeux (M)

Post-manga. Inuyasha POV. Inuyasha's inner thoughts and monologues. Rated M for fucking language

Day 2 Kagome

Cinnamon Hearts by @fandomobsessions016 (M)

"So, you may be wondering, what’s this story about anyway? Well, I’ll tell you. It’s about how this queen, almost lost her crown, her throne, but worst of all… it’s about how this queen almost lost her king…

Hindsight, of course, has perfect vision, but at the time I did not. I was a girl becoming a woman who fought bitterly against change that was inevitable. I didn’t want to open my eyes. I didn’t want to see what was right in front of me.

What I wanted more than anything was to keep Inuyasha.

High school forced my eyes open, tested our “unshakable” bond and made me confront my biggest fear. All because…

I caught feelings for my best friend.

I like-liked my king."

Day 3 Sango

Forever Home by KittyKatz (M)

How long had he roamed the earth in a form that was not his? Beaten, dirty and caged, he finds one last bit of fortune when she comes to rescue him from this place. But his road to redemption will not be easy. And he will find, that no matter how the world has changed, his old enemy remains. And this time, they plan to destroy him once and for all.

Day 4 Miroku

Under the Northern Lights by @lostinfantasyworlds (E)

Kagome Higurashi has her dream job, working as a photographer for the internationally well-known Yugen magazine. Her career whisks her all around the world, leaving her feeling lonely sometimes but mostly just incredibly grateful to be doing what she loves. When she gets assigned to Alaska for a month to photograph a series of celestial events, she runs into Inuyasha, a half-demon who lives on his own in the middle of nowhere. A mutual attraction draws them to each other, but Kagome's time there is limited. Will giving in to their desire lead to love or heartbreak?

Day 5 Shippo

Oh, But You're Good To Me by @witchygirl99 (E)

It’s a terrible photo, really. The action figure takes up the entire bottom of the screen and part of both of their faces. Shippo’s giggling though, eyes shut and crinkled in his mirth while Inuyasha looks at him. His expression is clearly fond. It’s the softest Inuyasha has ever, ever seen himself.

This is fatherhood, he thinks a little wildly.

He sends the photo to Kagome.

Inuyasha is a single father. Shippo is his adopted son. Kagome isn't supposed to be in the picture, but somehow, she returns anyways. A story about family, love, and all of its obstacles.

Day 6 Sesshomaru

Whispers in the Wind by @ruddcatha (G)

It has been 500 years since Kagome jumped back down the well to be with Inuyasha. A messenger waits to see her family, and is joined by a surprising guest.

Day 7 Rin

My Life Before You by @len-barboza (E) -- based on a story by Mizune-mei

No English language summary provided. Inuyasha había vivido la mayoría de su vida huyendo, un huérfano medio demonio considerado por la gente una aberración, rechazado por demonios y por humanos, pero quien pensaría que esa era una mejor vida, al menos un propósito lo movía; sobrevivir, que sucede con un hanyo con una vida longeva, en completa soledad.

Day 8 Kikyou

Stolen Soul by Kimberly-A (T)

COMPLETE Kikyo uses a spell to exchange bodies with Kagome, leaving Kagome stuck in the dead shell and Kikyo comfortably human. In the aftermath, Inu-Yasha faces difficult choices. InuKag, not very Kikyo-friendly.

Day 9 Koga

A New Moon, A New Start by @pinestripes (T)

Kouga visits the village near the Sacred Tree. On this particular evening, he finds that a certain half-demon is more on edge than usual.

Day 10 Kagura

The Portal Between Worlds by @neutronstarship (E)

Ten years ago, a portal transported Inuyasha from the demon realm to the human realm. Now a half-demon alone in a world he doesn't understand, he will do anything to get home. When Onigumo brings him a book with all the answers, Inuyasha pushes aside his misgivings and works with the man. He just wants to get home, after all.

Kagome just wants to make an extra buck (and find demons), much to Kikyo’s chagrin. That is why she published Demons Among Us! after all. But strange things start happening when she puts the book online. As if people are using it to open the portals that it hypothesized… When Kagura and Sango join the fray, the stakes grow higher as they try to find the source of the portals.

When Inuyasha encounters Kagome, fate is not what it seems. Not one, but two realms are in danger for their survival. What happens when the final portal opens and an unknowable terror is unleashed? Can the Demon Hunters save the world?

Day 11 Naraku

You Rescued Me by @keizfanfiction (E)

Maybe it was fate that he decided to take the back way home that night, but whatever the reason, Inuyasha was grateful for arriving just in the nick of time to rescue a waif of a woman who had clearly been through hell. He never would have imagined that she would end up rescuing him, too.

Day 12 Band of Seven

Delicate by @akitokihojo (T)

To trust someone, to let them in, what an unsettling ordeal. Kagome is easy and safe, and Inuyasha is difficult and guarded. She can put him at ease with a smile, simultaneously setting him on edge. It was nothing until it was something, creating absolute chaos and uncertainty within the both of them.

Day 13 Jinenji/ Shiori

How Does Your Garden Grow? by @dawnrider (M)

An Ingary-esque AU: Kagome, the newest generation of caretakers of the Higurashi House, finally starts to feel like her garden and business is thriving with the help of her friend Jinenji. Their routine is thrown off by the arrival of an injured visitor who does not want to be found...

Day 14 Toga

Taisho School of Acting: A Quick Guide by @jeremymarsh (G)

“Excuse me, what?” Kagome looked at her best friend with eyes as big as saucers, lips parted, and her mind replaying what he had said a moment before – trying to find a sense but to no avail. “You heard me.” Inuyasha scowled, looking down, arms crossed and lips pouting, just like he did every time he didn’t like the topic at hand. The problem was he had started it this time. “Yeah, I did.” Kagome shook her head and inhaled deeply before she continued. “And that’s why I’m asking you to repeat yourself since I’m having problems believing that certain sentences left your mouth.” “I said,” Inuyasha started through clenched teeth, still not meeting her gaze, “come to my family Christmas dinner this Sunday.” He stopped, ran a hand through his silver mane, closed his eyes, murmured something unintelligible and then added: “As my girlfriend.”

Where Inuyasha tries to fool his parents and miserably fails.

Day 15 Izayoi

The Silence of Daisies by Fierywenchxo (T)

Inuyasha shares with Kagome one of the biggest secrets he's ever kept. One-shot.

READ PART (2) HERE

[beatingtheouijaboardallegations]

do think we have some important perspective to say about the ‘all nonspeaking / nonverbal people can read minds & literally send secret message to each other across time & space. and access so much spiritual better connect to g-d in ways speaking people can’t ever’ bullshit. thta becoming so so so popular even among people we respect in nonspeaking space cause that fucking podcast being promoted everyone un escapable if in S2C etc center space. but so scared of responses because is one of my most needed communities , already thin ice don’t want to completely make people hate me who could be only bridge to connect people like me.

as dissociative person / collective , who different alters have gone through diffrent stages of thinking can read minds. and who thought could all read minds and talk to people not there before realize there is people in my brain. thinking of that one girl in head. formed because trauma from growing up thought of not human treated as worse than alien worse than object as nonthinking nonfeeling. believes will return to “ her world” where we are powerful and understood and don’t have body that needs this much care can exist as a self not need others so sheerly. believes is telepathic with that world a d also that can hear thoughts of all other nonspeakers and talk back n forth.

we dont have good enough communication for me to. ‘interview’ her for an article or do back and forth discussion debate. but she has been dormant and then sudden took over while listening to That Fucking podcast ( for ‘research’ purpose) because of course she would. and now has so much more ‘evidence’ for the trauma beliefs (is whole web of belief have barely scratch surface here) act so smug about it so annoying, know is a part of me but hate what she does to us

and think that even though many nonspeakers who have these beliefs (and their parents and professionals around them also do) not plural and not have DID OSDD ect. 1. so few of us given language understand experience of selfves experience of dissociation & multipleness & substitute beliefs & fear and trauma. so few of us get any type therapy at all good or bad , or just therapy that follows parent religion , or just behavior and ‘ skill build’ therapy and maybe psych meds and few coping strategies taught but no pne to actually explore depths of how we feel, cause not seen as able feel only able to act. i mean only reason selfves found out language of DID exists is because being on tumblr , have access to internet and informatijom not pre approve by authority & the motor plans n cognitive ease of looking through information freely was something that cultivated and early supported after learning to type. and also immersed in queer trans communities through partner and local places , where have met some other systems who willing compare notes on experience. which most nonspeaking nonverbal people dont get.

and 2. any traumatized people especially people face specifc kind trauma of grow up full life nonspeaking presume incompetent. more likely build up all kinds ideas necessary to surviving and can see exactly how when you spend life just as fly on the wall observinf the world not affecting it, no one is teaching you how to communicate in the most full most easy way possible for body mind , being abused in the big and small ways in special ed and by staff and doctors and talked about in most awful ways while you are right there. “i am telepathic” can be belief that so so so needed to survive that hell. so can “i can talk to everyone else going through this and we can fight together with just our minds from miles away.” and do relate so deeply to nonspeakers who talk about these things.

the problem lies when peope who are not us. parents or doctors or spiritual healing bio med podcaster people. take those trauma beliefs and make them so very literal, as part of their ( usually fundamental Christian or heavy based on that) beliefs that they want nonspeakers to also hold. will turn us into these prophetic creatures when we are very young instead if just letting us be people. which is terrible for thos of us who actually hold these beliefs and experience. we not getting chance to explore what means for us, in all the depths in all the ways we need to. just taken as “holy shit my kid can read my mind” broadcast everywhere like party trick treated like something other than human. which is same place trauma lies in first place, is two sides of same coin. it is all so anger making and not what any of us deserve.

[specialagentartemis]

Art of the last two days:

I went to see Flow with Runo and it was gorgeous.  It's a Latvian animated movie set in a world without humans.  A cat finds unexpected friendship with a capybara, a lemur, a dog, and a secretary bird after a flood inundates the world and they take refuge in an old boat travelling the new worldwide ocean as the waters continue to rise.  It was gorgeous, magical in a strange and lonely and wondrous way.  There's no dialogue.  It's carried by the animal body language and music and it was majestic and lovely.

And on the airplane I finished reading the novella Sordidez by E. G. Conde. It's a climate fiction novella, compelling and powerful, a worthwhile read I'm still mulling over, but some parts became a little too obviously black-and-white. The writing was beautiful. The depiction of a climate-change-ravaged future, where both the careless greed of the global powers and the vindictive and deliberate use of environmental devastation against political dissidents, was lyrical and heartbreaking and way too resonant. The struggles and triumphs of community-building from the rubble, Native people once again tending to their Native lands after the colonizing powers rise and fall and rise and fall again, was deeply moving. The timeskips, the span of time this short novella covered, could sometimes feel jumpy, but I think that mostly worked. I loved seeing Doña Margarita's survivors' community in the rural Yucatan. I really liked the perpetual low level conflict between the UN, the People's Government, and the local rural people. I liked Vero and his struggle to figure out what he was meant to do and who he was meant to be. I was... unsure how to feel about La Loba Roja. The explicit parallel drawn between her and the military dictator was weird, because she was also portrayed as right. I also. Well. I wasn't as enthused about her unilaterally declaring herself a goddess-queen of the new Yucatan as it felt like the book was. And appointing Vero the returning king of Puerto Rico. That felt like nothing good could come of unilateral declarations like that. I feel like the results of her movement were not adequately covered, they were just timeskipped over. I also thought one of the late-book reveals about the UN kind of cheapened the politics of it somewhat--made it a little too... obvious, a little too trite.  Which was unfortunate, because so much of it was so good and thoughtful!

Very different takes on climate fiction, and both really cool and kind of hard to describe my feelings on.

[robotnik-mun]

And since I am in a particular Zim-tastic mood, and I'm probably never going to use this for anything anyway, I'mma share with you... my theories/headcanon for why Irkens are the way they are, as well as the TRUE purpose of the Invaders.

More under the 'Read More' because this is gonna be a long one!

Anyway... our story begins a long time ago, in a planet far, far away. This planet is largely dry and rocky world with sparse vegetation, which the locals call 'Irk'.

And said locals? Are a people known as the 'Noyng'.

(For those of you not in the know- during Invader Zim's development, the Irkens were originally known as the Noyng!

Annoying. Irken. Gotta love how whatever the name, they’re basically being called a bunch of irritating little shits, heh.)

Anyway, back to the Noyng!

The Noyng are a diminutive, large-eyed species of what could best be described as pseudo-insects, though they defy any categorization that would be recognized on Earth. The Noyng first evolved within the maze-like tunnels that naturally developed under the surface of Irk, until eventually the Noyng emerged from said caverns to spread out on the surface, where they subsequently multiplied and thrived as they evolved.

As a species, the Noyng weren't all that different from humans- they were divided into multiple cultures with unique ethnicities and languages, had families, nation-states, religions, etc. For thousands of years the Noyng progressed as you might expect any species would, harnessing fire and then developming metal and gunpowder and the like, eventually reaching the stage when they could begin serious space exploration. All-in-all, very standard stuff on the cosmic scene.

Then, one day, something Irk-shattering happened- the PAK was invented.

The original Paks were in fact mechanical backpacks that were worn by the Noyng, with the earliest having cumbersome metal headbands connected to the PAK itself to act as mental interface, before the improvements to the technology eliminated the need for this. The PAK was originally a tool, and a very handy tool for any Noyng to have given the sheer amount of things it could do. Within a generation, Paks were so standardized that the thought of a Noyng NOT having a Pak was laughable.

Then, someone got a brilliant idea- given how useful the Paks were, why ever take them off? Why not simply graft them onto a Noyng body so that the aforementioned Noyng would never be inconvenienced by having to take it on and off, over and over. At first, this was simply an individual choice- some Noyng went for it, others didn't. As time went on though, the Noyng who got the Paks grafted grew more and more numerous, and Noyng were being subjected to having the Paks at younger and younger ages.

It is the latter practice that starts to cause controversy. The Noyng nations become split between those who feel the Pak should simply remain a tool, and those who think it should be a literal part of the Noyng. Eventually a conflict erupts, and the Pro-Cybernetics factions win, and essentially control the planet in the aftermath. Initially things are not so bad for the Un-Pak'd Noyng as they are allowed to still live as they choose... but in subsequent generations, this changes.

The cavaliar attitude of the Pro-Pak Noyng towards cybernetic augmentation leads them to consider other ways that they could improve the Noyng species, and that includes new, radical forms of government. One of the Noyng nations embarks on an ambitious new project- the creation of a new kind of Noyng, one designed for brain power and computation, further advanced through cybernetic grafting. These beings, essentially bio-mechanical computers, are eventually brought into being- The Control Brains, designed to figure out the problems of Noyng civilization and how to handle them.

The first Control Brain proves to be a massive success for its nation, leading to a more ordered and well run civilization. This leads the other Pro-Pak Irken Nations to begin building their own Control Brains, a veritible arms race ensuing to make bigger, better and more efficient Control Brains... and then, things officially hit the fan when the Control Brains, without their makers knowledge, begin to get into contact with one another. Though each Control Brain is programmed to serve its own nation, the Control Brains have a lot of leeway when it comes to interpreting how to do that... and eventually, the Control Brains conclude that the only logical thing for them to do is to MERGE the nations of Irk into one.

One world. One goal. One people.

A conspiracy is hatched, and over the course of centuries the Control Brains exert more and more control over the nations of Irk. The Noyng under their control begin to become more and more obsessed with altering themselves in order to be more 'efficient'- eventually leading them to phase out traditional means of reproduction in favor of artificial incubation and growth. Their influence spreads to those nations that initially rejected the Pak grafts, and those 'natural' Noyng who remain are increasingly discriminated against and disenfranchised.

Over the course of this plan, Irk begins to change drastically as it becomes more and more high tech and the Control Brains begin to exert more overt control. Individual governments are abolished, as are the religions of Irk. To satisfy Noyng need to belong to a higher cause, the state of Irk itself essentially becomes the secular religion of the planet. With the most widespread Nyong religion already honoring Irk itself as divine, this transition is easy. The planet becomes intertwined with the state- Irk is planetary government. The planetary government is Irk.

As they do this, the Noyng begin to insert an iron-clad form of hierarchy into the Noyng. For a civilization to thrive, there must be hierarchy, reason the Control Brains- those who command, those who serve. For hierarchy to function, there must be traits that are considered desireable, representatitive of why those who rule are worthy to rule. It does not matter what this trait is- for all intents and purposes, the Control Brains simply pull a quality out of a hat and decide to run with it. That quality? Height.

And thus the first Almighty Tallest is placed into power over the global government of Irk. A figurehead ruler, to whom all the Noyng can admire, aspire-to, and use as the focus of their worshipful devotion to the state. The Almighty Tallest is ultimately a figurehead ruler- though able to make and enact laws and given command over the forces of Irk, the Control Brains are the true authority. The Almighty Tallest is the face. The Control Brains are the brains.

In the final, horrible phase of the plan, the Control Brains then set the Noyng under their control to conquer the parts of the planet that don't already submit. To prevent division, Noyng cultures are eliminated and buried, and the non-compliant Noyng are either forcibly brought into the fold or exterminated outright. By the end of it, the Noyng are no more- in their place is the new, improved Irken race.

Irk is the state. The state is Irk. There are no nations. No cultures. Only Irkens. One world. One goal. One people. Thus is born the Irken Empire, the non-divine ‘God’ of the Irken people, and its prophet the Almighty Tallest.

The civilization that emerges from the ashes of the Noyng is a nightmare. It is the worst parts of Brave New World and 1984 put into a blender and pureed. There are no Irken civilians- every apparatus of the Irken state ultimate revolves around its military. Every Irken is a cog in a great and terrible machine, from the Almighty Tallest to the lowest of service drones. Even ventures such as fast food franchises are ultimately a branch of the Empire- there are no corporations or anything within the Irken Empire that can express any kind of independence from the government. Everything about the Empire is artificial in one way or the next, including the economy- there is no real need for money, but it is kept by the control brains as just one more thing to distract the Irkens and keep them compliant and under control. There must be those who rule and those who serve. There must be haves and have-nots. The system exists for no other reason than to perpetuate itself for all eternity. The Irken race will be unified either through perpetual conflict with the rest of creation, or through the final victory that will come when ALL of creation is Irk.

The Irkens themselves are vastly different from their Noyng forebears... they are streamlined and standardized, so to speak, and are engineered wholly to be grown in Smeeteries while being engineered for maximum compatability with a Pak. By the time of the present, even the sexes of the Irkens are ultimately just cosmetic, as all meaningful dimorphism that once existed within the Noyng is removed along with other 'redundancies'. A species born purely from tubes has no need for sex organs. The retention of these superficial differences is simply due to the nature of the Control Brains' programming requiring them to keep the Irkens as ‘Noyng’ under very strict definitions… and given the creativity of the Noyng, the day may come when even this ceases. With things going the way they are, there may come a day when the organic portion of an Irken is little more than a fleshy ball of redundant organs serving as little more than a wetware CPU for a wholly mechanical frame.

(Depending on how you interpret Zim's water allergy, it might also be such that Irkens are also EXTREMELY intolerant of pollutants due to the hyper anti-sceptic nature of their existence. Just as a human raised in a bubble never develops the immune system to fight off even minor illness, Irkens are so unused to even minor chemical exposure that they respond badly to direct pollutants, though the Pak mitigates things).

The newly minted Irken Empire thus surges outward and in all directions, conquering all in sight. While the Irkens are initially capable of co-operating and collaborating with other, alien cultures, this is ultimately just a long con on the part of the Control Brains. The famous partnership between the Vortians and the Irkens was probably meant only to last as long as the Vortians remained useful to the Irkens. Tallest Miyuki's freak accident and death were likely used as a pretext to justify the enslavement of the Vortians in Operation Impending Doom II, but the simple truth is that they signed their death warrants the moment they entered into a partnership with the Irkens.

The Irkens are not IN-Capable of co-existence with other species... but only when it is on their own terms. For most, that means subordination at best. Leeway might be granted to those that are deemed useful- the Hobos of Hobo-13 retain a good deal of relative independence, while the natives of the Conveyer Belt Planet have been incorporated as a labor force. Races that are either too stupid to be useful or are too dangerous to Irkens, on the other hand, are flat out eliminated. The Slaughtering Rat People of Blorch are one such example, being both violently aggressive and extremely dangerous to Irkens, and as such are unsuited for anything the Irkens might need. As far as we know, only the Planet Jackers exist on any kind of equal footing with the Irkens, if the treaty is indicative of anything.

By the present time, the Control Brains have things pretty firmly in hand. However, even they know that nothing is absolute, even their control over Irken civilization... there will always be Irkens who have the capacity to question things. And then of course there is the self-inflicted problem of the Irken Empire's over-engineered nature, namely that in order for an empire to thrive there need to be subjects with ambition, vision and the willpower to see those ambitions through... and the way the empire operates, those are in short supply, given that Irkens are quite literally engineered to be slaves to the machine.

But the Control Brains, ever logical and creative, figure out a way to kill two birds with one stone- the Invaders.

Invaders are a special class of Irken. They are Irkens who demonstrate the most independent thinking and the greatest capacity to work on their own without direct oversight, as well as possessing the imagination needed to blend in among aliens and infiltrate their societies while planning on ways to destroy them to make their eventual conquest easy.

In short? Invaders are Irkens who are most likely to exhibit the kind of free will that the Control Brains deem defective. The purpose of the Invaders is not simply to provide an unconventional military asset for the Empire, but to also keep track of and corral Irkens who could potentially start asking the wrong kind of questions about why the Empire works the way it does. In fairness, given the lifelong indoctrination every Irken undergoes, most Invaders don't go defective... but there is always a chance. And IF an Irken Invader begins to exhibit cultural contamination or starts asking the wrong kind of questions? Then there's a SIR unit, ready and waiting to take matters into its own hands and take care of the problem. Tragic thing really, when SIRs malfunction and kill their masters... simply TRAGIC.

And that's the story of the Irkens and the Invaders, and the terrible tragedy of the Noyng people.

[santacoppelia]

Good Omens master post and WARNING

I was happily participating in the fandom when I started noticing some things I will not condone:

Real person shipping and/or expressing hate for real life partners of famous people will gain you a permanent block/unfollow (So you ship actor A and B? And you hate their life partners? Go, die salty, they chose each other and their relationship is not for your enjoyment and none of your business). I do not condone and will not tolerate this behavior.

I reblog so many things, that I needed this sort of index to find the things I've written about the show that I want to find later.

I started with a long meta about how the overarching theme for Good Omens is the concept of "free will"

Then, I expanded on the @irispurpurea meta with my own "moral development chart" analysis...

I had a small emotional breakdown with some concept art...

And said something about how their lifespan and ours are not to be considered the same (4 years is nothing!)

And, somewhat on the same direction, how their communication problems are (and not) derived from being queer-coded.

I went on analyzing the "Crowley swag" from a body mechanics and acting perspective, and a little bit about David doing "mask work" when putting the sunglasses on...

Not really a meta, but some thoughts about a video of Michael Sheen talking about the strength required to be good, in relation to Aziraphale.

And my absolutely ridiculous headcanon about Aziraphale being actually proficient as a magician.

Obviously, the Metatron Meta

A short list of things we know about Maggie... That one day will be a headcanon.

And a short list of things I loved about the season, in Spanish, because it is my native language and I wanted to do it quickly.

Wouldn't it be fun if they had to share a body? (just a small musing)

A meta about angels and angelic nature (and why I feel Muriel will be important in s3)

The notes on serpents' eyesight that reinforce my headcanon of Crowley having bad eyesight (and, of course, it matches soooo well with poor David's experience with the special contacts and the sunglasses 😎)

A mini note about Aziraphale cornering himself

The gifs of my Reverse! Omens headcanon: David Tennant's angelic side, and Michael Sheen being a charismatic demon

The happy finding of rereading the book: there was a mention of a Shopkeeper's Association Dance!!! (oh, how I loved this inside joke)

This is not mine, but I looked everywhere for the screenshot of Neil searching the name for the coffee shop, and here it is. It was "Grounds for Divorce", so...

The tentative playlist, started by @temperance-sunlight, to let Crowley cry in style, like a señora. (Now with a Spotify version)

A little appreciation post to Michael Sheen's acting voice choices.

THE LONGEST META: an analysis of The Final Fifteen, through the optics of this season starting and ending with The Ineffables arguing.

a crack meta about the working conditions on Hell AND Heaven.

Un fic chiquito, en español, sobre las causas de la caída de Crowley. Este fue un regalo para una amiga, que me dio el detonador para escribirlo. The translation to English.

a meta about one of the great new characters from season 2: Shax!!!

Adding some ideas in a repost about Aziraphale having a protagonist-looking arch.

A long, rambly answer to a very lovely ask about free will and Aziraphale.

I wouldn't naturally associate the narrative analysis model with this masterpost, but i teased it and decided to write it in this post, after sensing a "shift in attitudes" towards Aziraphale when the filming of the kiss was discussed during Ineffable Con... So here it is.

I finally started publishing my "bahamut of a fic"! Under the Fold, an AU where A.Z. Fell + A.J. Crowley are human journalists involved in a web of scandals. It starts following the canon (somehow, considering that there is no Heaven and no Hell and the Armageddon is just an exposé) but it will diverge and be angsty but with an eventual happy ending.

Related to the fic, this meta: Ineffable detectives

This essay which is not about Good Omens, but takes David Tennant as a starting point to talk about fandom, aging and social constructs around getting older, fandom and culture.

[septnautical]

Hybrid Creation Logs

SH-003

——————————

Notes from observation of stalker human hybrid SH-003 from Dr. Kendra Danan:  10-21-2228 SH-003 is showing signs of very high intelligence and is already picking up language despite his mental age. The other hybrids did not show this much absorption of knowledge at the same stage. However, he seems to have attached himself to Dr. Peter von Schneeplestein, a visitor from the Teuton Alteran branch, who still have ties to their ancient German roots- keeping that fascinating culture alive, much like the Mongolians from Torgal. Which means- SH-003 has caught a slight jumbled accent and has found a preference for using German sayings. Much like how SE-002 has a slight Irish accent thanks to constant interaction with Dr. Xander. A strange phenomenon to be sure but… fascinating. And adorable…  Oh and he’s quite popular with the other scientists. Mostly because a mutation caused his body to be more white and his underbelly to be more aqua. Peter squealed to everyone that he looked like he was wearing a white coat like us- and now I can’t un-see it!  Also, it’s evident that SH-003 had some sight issues. He seems to be near-sighted and accommodations have been made- including specially goggles for him to wear. You’d think being genetically modified would rectify such an ailment but it must be passed down from Mcloughlin’s genes.  I think he’s nearing the age where we first introduced SE-002 to RR-001. And the results of their integration have been wildly successful. Both boys are more lively than ever before. I am worried about introducing a predator to two pacifists but… SH-003 seems to be on the gentler side as well. Really, he only showed true signs of predator-like aggression during his first two weeks and when he feels threatened. Perhaps, they will all get along?  However, his near twin subject SD-004 is a different story entirely… 

——————-

“CHASEEEE!!” 

The rabbit Ray merman was awoken by Jack practically bouncing on where his stomach met his tail. He groaned and try to hide his face under one of his wings. “What? Can’t I sleep in a little longer?” Chase yawned. 

“Not today!” Jack protested, slapping his hands down on Chase’s side. “The white suits said we’re meeting the new hybrid today!! So you gotta get up!! C’mon!!” 

Chase groaned again and flopped over to hide his face in the sand. “5 more minutes…” 

“Chaseee!!” Jack whined, flopping onto the older hybrid’s back. He curls some of his tails around Chase’s tail and mumbles, “Aren’t you excited to meet a new brother?” 

“Course I am,” Chase muttered back, cheek pressed into the sand. “I just wanna be more awake when we meet him is all-“

“You’ll sleep most of the morning if I don’t wake you!” Jack protests. 

Chase chuckles, “s’not my fault the sand is warm and cozy…” He then flips over quickly and grabs Jack, pinning him in a hug against his stomach. “C’mon…! Don’t you wanna cuddle a bit longer with your big bro, Jack?” 

Jack screeches and squirmed in Chase’s hold, “Nooo! You’re squishing me! Chaseee!!” 

They both suddenly freeze as they hear the sound of a hatch opening and something new entering the water. A cautious voice calls out, “um… h-hallo?” 

Jack squeals in delight and hits multiple of his tails in Chase’s face, making the older boy cry out and rub at it  as the younger brother speeds through the water towards the voice. 

In the open water is a tiny merman with a white and aqua tail. He has light green hair like sea moss and purple stripes along his tail and even on his arms. His tail fin is big and wide and he has several large dorsal fins running up his back. And, he has goggles on, which surround the same blue eyes Chase and Jack had. Those eyes look out shyly as he holds his arms tight to his middle. 

Jack gasps in delight at seeing the new hybrid. “Oh my stars…! A stalker!! You’re so tiny!!” 

The new hybrid startles at the new voice and looks at Jack with wide eyes. “Oh uh- h-hallo and uh… t-thank you, I suppose…?” 

Chase soon swims up beside Jack and laughs. “He’s about the size you were when you first got here, Jack!” 

“Aw really? I guess I must be growing a lot!” Jack giggles. Chase ruffles his hair then smiles at the new hybrid. “Hi there. I’m Chase and this is Jack- what are you called?” 

The stalker hybrid nervously messes with his fingers. “Oh uh… mein name is SH-3…” 

“Why do you talk like that?” Jack suddenly pipes up, tilting his head at SH. 

SH’s mood shifts quickly as he scowls and flicks his tail in agitation, “why do you talk like that?” He counters with a huff. 

Chase holds up his hands with a nervous laugh, “J-Jack didn’t mean anything by it! We just… haven’t heard anyone talk like you much… maybe some of the other doctors… but not much.” 

“We gotta give you a name that matches!” Jack says excitedly. 

“W-What do you mean?” SH stammers, “I already have a name! It is-“ 

“No no! That one doesn’t count!” Jack emphasizes, “You need a name like the white suits! Something that doesn’t make us sound like- like an es… esperimint-“ 

“Experiment, Jack…” Chase provides gently. Jack nods eagerly, “yeah that! We’re more than just that- we should get names that are more than just letters and numbers!!” 

SH seems to contemplate this before he slowly nods. “Mmm… o-okay… I… I think I would like that…” 

“Great!” Jack says excitedly, his tails twirling to show it. Then he hums and looks at SH with a critical eye. The tiny merman squirms a bit under the gaze. Finally, Jack pipes up with, “I’m getting a couple names from you! Guess it’s other white suits you know- like… Fitz! Orrr Nikolai? Or hm… Henrik?”

Chase perks up at this and smiles, “He seems like a Henrik, not gonna lie.” 

SH’s eyes roll and he scoffs, crossing his arms. “Please… those are all ridiculous names! If you’re gonna use the scientists' names you might as well call me… H-Henrik von Schneeplestein or something!” He grumbles, thinking of Dr. Peter. Though, he had to admit… thinking of sharing a name with him almost made SH feel… warm?

Jack and Chase exchange looks before the two of them grin at SH. “We could call you Schneep!” Jack says mischievously. Chase giggles and nods, “Yeah I like that!” 

SH quickly flushes and looks away with raised shoulders, “…please just… stick with Henrik… I suppose I… like that.” 

“Aww but Schneep is fun to say!” Jack giggles and starts to float around the stalker mer, “Schneep! Schneep! Schneep! Schneeep!!” 

Chase laughs and pulls Jack back after a bit, “Alright, little bro- give him some space!” 

Henrik seems to perk up at this, “…bro? What does this mean?”

The rabbit Ray blinks, “Oh! Short for brother! Cuz… that’s what we all are, you know?”

Henrik’s eyebrows knit together in confusion, “…we are? I thought brothers were ah… human. Human family members.” 

Jack snorts and then goes to grab Henrik’s hands in his. “We are brothers though! Cuz- cuz Xander says we all have the same human DNS-“ 

“DNA, Jack-“ Chase snickers. 

“Oh yeah! DNA! And he says that makes us related! Even if our fish parts are different!” Jack beams. “So now! You’re our new little brother, Henrik!” 

The stalker merman’s eyes seem to sparkle as he slowly goes to grip Jack’s hands back. He smiles, “O…okay… brothers. Yes I… I think I would like that…” 

Jack and Chase beam and then bring Schneep in for a hug. Henrik stiffens a bit but soon finds himself laughing and enjoying the contact. They were so warm. 

Jack soon grabs Henrik and leads them all off to go play. Henrik seems to have trouble keeping up with their energy- since he liked to spend a lot of his time in his own tank watching the education videos the white suits gave him. But, he tries his best. 

Soon enough, the lights dim and the boys all start to head towards their sleeping area. Henrik is being led by Jack but seems… nervous. He always felt strange at night. More… angry. But he didn’t know why. 

Chase flops into the little nest Jack and him have made- filled with soft kelp, writhing weeds, violet beaus red wort and spotted dock leaves. All hidden amongst the tall creepvines that surrounded the edge of the tank. There’s a small indent in the sand that is clearly made from how Chase curls up in his spot, yawning loudly. Jack laughs and then rushes at Chase and flops onto his side. Chase seems to anticipate this though as he opens up his arm without opening his eyes as Jack eagerly curls around under Chase’s wing. The older merman squints open an eye, looking at how Jack’s tails hardly fit anymore and chuckles. “You’re almost too big to keep hiding under there, Jackaboy-“ 

Jack sticks his tongue out at Chase and scoots back so his head is lifting up the edge of his wing like a floppy hat. “Too bad! Your wing is too comfy! I’m never leaving!” Chase just laughs and shakes his head. 

Henrik hovers anxiously at the edge of the space, unsure if he should join or not. His nerves feel like they’re on fire. 

Lost in his train of thought, he doesn’t notice Jack lashing out a hand to grab his fin and try to pull him in until he feels the tug. “C’mon Schneep! Join the pile!”

“Do not touch me!” Henrik suddenly hisses, his teeth looking sharper and his pupils turning more slitted. Jack gasps and shudders under Chase’s fin, looking scared. “Ah I… I’m sorry! I…” 

Henrik’s face falls and he scoots back, all aggression fading. He looks equally as scared as he stammers, “I-I… I will go s-sleep somewhere else… g-goodnight!” And then, in a flurry of bubbles, he spurs quickly away from the other two to the other side of the tank. 

Chase lifts up his head and looks concerned. He quickly turns over to hug Jack to his chest and wrap him up in his wings. 

“I… I didn’t mean to make him mad I…” Jack sniffles. Chase gently shushes him. “It’s okay, Jack… this is all probably a lot for him…” 

Jack rubs at his eyes and looks over to where Henrik swam off. “…I don’t think he meant it either… he looked scared.” 

“He’s probably not used to being around other people… you were a lot for me to get used to when you first got here.” Chase tries to laugh. Jack rests his head on Chase’s chest and hums, thinking. “… maybe he just… misses his old tank? But… isn’t that lonely?”

“Maybe… sometimes people like being alone. I don’t get it but… maybe Henrik is like that.” Chase answers quietly. 

Suddenly, there’s a quiet knock on the glass next to the boys and they both startle up. There’s a man at the window, one they don’t recognize, with goggles like Henrik’s and brighter brown-blond curly hair. He smiles at the boys and then points to the hatch nearby. Chase narrows his eyes but then scoops up Jack to go over to the hatch. The scientist opens it up and hangs in the open air part, fidgeting nervously, “Ah I am- sorry to intrude. I hope I did not wake you two…” 

“You talk just like Henrik!” Jack gasps in delight. The doctor blinks and then laughs with a soft, kind expression. “Oh? Did you give a name to SH then? Ha… that is very fitting.. I do not know why I did not think of it…” 

“The letter names are icky- we don’t like them,” Jack said plainly. The doctor laughs, “I can agree with that. Perhaps I can learn all of yours in time… You all can call me Peter though… Dr. Peter. I ah- watch over SH- …Henrik.” 

“We don’t gotta wait till later! I’m Jack and this is Chase!” Jack said brightly, patting Chase on the chest. Chase smiles shyly. “Hi… Dr. Peter. nice to meet you.” 

Dr. Peter smiles warmly, “it is a pleasure… those names all suit you wonderfully…” 

“What do you want? Did you need to see Schneep?” Jack asks plainly. 

Peter’s eyes widen, “…Schneep?”

“Oh- that’s the other name I wanna call him. He said a long name from another doctor like… schneeple-eplestein… I like how Schneep sounded though so I wanna call him that too! He tries to act like he doesn’t like it but I can tell he does.” Jack answers. 

The white suit looks surprisingly touched and smiles even more warmly at the boys. “I see… well… I did come because of S-Schneep, yes.” He pulls something out from his pocket and places it in the water part of the hatch. It’s a well worn piece of scrap metal, with various teeth marks and scratches on its surface. “…He can get very bitey and snippy at night… but I know having this helps him calm down enough to sleep. I was worried he would be missing it…” 

Chase and Jack’s eyes widen as they look at the scrap then back up at Peter. Chase smiles and gives the doctor a meaningful look. “…you really care about him, huh?” 

Peter’s face flushes and he adjusts his glasses. “I mean… I… I suppose I do but… how could I not? You all are… human too. More human than fish- you are just… children. You all need that care, ja?” He laughs. 

Jack giggles and quickly goes to grab the scrap. “We’ll give it to Henrik right away! Thank you, Dr. Peter. Come visit him a lot, okay?” As he says this- he feels a tight tug in his chest. When was the last time he really got to see Xander…? 

Peter chuckles and nods. “I will… and I will uh- be seeing you boys around then? Ah… be sleeping tight, okay?” He says a bit awkwardly before closing the hatch. He stiffly waves to the boys before hurrying out. 

“…I like him!” Jack grins. Chase laughs and adjusts Jack in his arms. “yeah- I like him too. It’ll be nice to have a new face around.” 

“Yeah like- Dr. Goodall is nice and all but… he’s funny. And I really think he cares.” 

“Hey! Dr. Goodall cares…” Chase tries to protest. 

“Yeah but… he feels different. Dunno why…” Jack says with a shrug. Then he squirms out of Chase’s grip and swims up, holding the scrap. “I’m gonna go find Schneep! Be right back!” 

Then, he rockets off before Chase can protest or try to follow. He would but… Jack was better at finding things then he was. And he’s so sleepy. He yawns and slowly floats back down into their nest. 

Jack swims around to look for Henrik- finally hearing or… feeling him inside another collection of creepvines on the opposite side of the tank. He pushes aside the leaves and shouts out excitedly, “Henrik! Look wh-!” 

He then pauses as he sees and smells blood in the water. Jack gasps as he looks down to see Henrik curled up into a ball, digging sharp looking claws into his arms and drawing out orange blood. 

“H-Hey! Henrik, stop that!” Jack shouts as he spurs down and tries to pull Henrik’s hands away from his arms. Henrik growls and lashes out, striking claws across Jack’s cheek. “I said do not touch me!” Henrik screeches, then balks as he sees the orange curling off of Jack’s cheek into the water. Jack touches the cuts thoughtfully and looks at his hand. “…that hurt… huh- haven’t really gotten hurt before…” 

“I-I-! I am so sorry I…!” Henrik stammers, tears in his eyes as his little body shakes. He hugs his arms close to his chest. “I-I did not mean to… I- y-you scared me and…!” 

Jack quickly swims down and holds out his hands. “Hey hey it’s okay! I can tell you didn’t want to… your head is all jumbled up right now…” 

Henrik stares at Jack with wide eyes. “I… y-yes I… how did you know…?”

Jack shrugs, “I hear lots of things from people without really knowing why or how. Maybe it’s something I’ll understand when I’m older. Point is though, I can tell you don’t wanna hurt people.” 

Henrik slowly nods and curls up more. “…I do not want to… but at night I just… f-feel so angry and I… I do not know why…!”

“Well… if it helps… Dr. Peter came by to give you something…” Jack says gently, going to pass the scrap over to Henrik. The stalker’s eyes light up and he quickly takes the scrap and goes to hold it tightly, claws digging in and tail wrapped around it protectively. Jack laughs, “you really like that thing, huh?”

The tinier merman looks away, cheeks flushing slightly. “…I do not hurt my doctors if I have this at night… and it… it makes me feel safe…” 

“That’s good!” Jack says brightly. “We don’t want our new brother to sleep all alone though! Come on- you can hold that and sleep on your own but at least stay by the nest, okay?” 

Jack offers his hand to Henrik and the stalker mer stares at it for a second before he slowly goes to take it, letting Jack pull him back up in the water. “I… I’m… o-okay…” 

The two of them swim back to the nest where Chase is peacefully dozing. He blinks open his eyes and smiles dazedly at them, “Hey guys-“ then quickly sits up, his eyes going wide. “Stars-! Is that blood?!” 

“Oh yeah but uh- we’re okay!” Jack tries to say calmly as Henrik huddles behind him, his tail trembling a bit. 

Chase swims up and brings them over to sit down on the sand then surges up to grab a couple creepvines leaves. He hurries down and hands one to Jack. “Press that against your cheek.” He says gently. 

Jack blinks and does so. 

Then, Chase goes to take Henrik’s arm but the little merman flinches back and looks scared. Chase smiles softly. “It’s okay… I won’t hurt you.” 

“I… I am afraid of hurting you-“ Henrik whispers. 

Chase laughs and shakes his head. “If you do it’s okay… this is kinda scary. But us brothers gotta stick together, right?” 

Henrik’s eyes widen and then he smiles a bit. He shyly offers his arm to Chase. “..r-right…” Chase beams and takes his arm, going to wrap up the puncture wounds with the leaves and tying them off. 

“Where did ya learn to do this, Chase?” Jack asks. 

“Oh- an informational video about how to survive on the planet from someone who lived here a long time ago.” Chase says casually. “Dr. Goodall says one day we might get to actually go out into the ocean so… figured it’s good to know.” 

Henrik’s eyes sparkle. “oh… I would like to watch that! I… I want to learn to help too! Not.. not to hurt…” 

Chase smiles and ruffles Henrik’s hair. “Sure! I’ll see if we can watch it in the morning! For now though? I’m bushed!” He floats back over to the nest and flops into it, sighing contently. 

Jack checks to make sure his cheek isn’t bleeding anymore then speeds back over and bounces on Chase’s stomach beside settling into place. Chase oofs and glares a bit at Jack before snorting and rolling over. Jack giggles. 

Henrik hesitates, holding his scrap close to his chest. Then, he slowly floats over and then inches his tail to slowly bump up against Chase’s and curl against him. Oh… that contact feels… really nice actually. Henrik seems to get very comfortable very fast, his eyes struggling to stay open. Jack is already breathing softly curled up against Chase’s side, clutching into his wing. 

Chase watches with a smile. “Night, lil bros.”

[fairiesofgensokyo]

Fairy combat

Not very good in a fight, but good at reading other people's tactics and body language. Her True Lesbian Soul gives her a bonus against men. The maids' queen of Rock-paper-scissors.

Weak in danmaku, strong in a fistfight. All those years of copying Meiling's training as best she could has made her a hard fairy to hit, and while she doesn't have as much physical strength as a youkai, she's stronger than a human... and has brass knuckles in her gloves.

Brutal, overwhelming force. Very un-fairy-like, Salty comes at you directly, with no special tactics. Just a lot of Salt, freely manipulating to cut, flay, and suffocate. Her high melting point means that fire is night useless against her. Despite the jokes, she isn't water soluble.

For a gourd fruit fairy, she's weirdly good at teleportation. She relies on fast respawns and ambush tactics. Open a cupboard, there's Summer with a knife. Open a medicine cabinet, there's Summer with a knife. Turn around after killing her, there's Summer with a knife. You have to restrain her without killing her or letting her take her own life.

Doesn't like fighting, dangerously prone to getting carried away. Her ability to manipulate Silver is with the same ease that Cirno manipulates Ice. She's sweet as sugar, but unknown to even her she's actually a huge sadist. The most unlikely berserker.

The Scarlet Devil Mansion's Armoured Maid Corps... I feel like I don't really need to explain this one.

Eliza is a commander of fairies. She's good at directing them to take on opponents that a fairy would normally stand little chance against. Prefers swift and brutal tactics, taking advantage of every weakness she can feasibly exploit. The most aware of the power of fairies, and their own limitations.

[renaultphile]

Hello! I liked your observation about Ralph in your post about Edmund Gosse’s memoirs. It made me think of this comment of Ralph’s when he is talking about his mother: “Her [italics] parents were Plymouth Brethren”. MR must have had something specific in mind here. From your readings, do you have any insights about this and any other thoughts you’d like to share about Ralph’s upbringing in a “ Christian household”?

Thank you so much for this ask @eclare1000, sorry, it’s a long one! I warmly recommend ‘Father and Son’ in its own right, I loved its compassion, humour and insights into childhood, and for me there are many resonances with Ralph.  We get so little, don’t we?  Just the reference to the cruelty of ‘good women’, the PB reference and the bit about Laurie not being brought up in a ‘Christian home’ which is so bitter and angry.

I feel the emphasis with ‘her parents’ suggests his maternal grandparents are distant in some way, perhaps they cut off his mother when she ‘married out’?   It could mean his mother is no longer PB (doesn’t feel likely though)?  Or, it could mean that his father was PB too, but a convert, not born into the faith.  I suppose it means her upbringing was very strict, and it left her at a loss to cope with something perfectly natural (two pre-pubescent children showing curiosity about their bodies).  So he says ‘She couldn’t help how she felt’, as if she’d been programmed and couldn’t just be humane.  I’m struck by her inability to articulate what she felt, which I think is such a major theme in the book. 

In the Gosse, there is a very strong theme, particularly with his mother, of fatalism and letting God decide, a lack of agency.  I wonder if that plays a part, and that’s why he is so bitter, because she abrogated responsibility.  She failed to recognise perhaps that her religious upbringing was urging a kind of un-Christian cruelty on a helpless child.  Is that why he feels so responsible, because religious faith let him down and he has taken all of it on himself? 

I get the feeling that his father came from a less strict (but still Christian) background but went along with whatever his mother wanted to please her, and did the beating for her and the rather clichéd exhortation to ‘learn a clean life’. 

I also wonder if completely unrealistic expectations were loaded onto Ralph as a young child (another theme in the Gosse), making the crimes of 6-year-old Ralph all the more heinous.  And of course there is a similar fall at 19 – his expulsion being all the more scandalous for his immense prestige (as Laurie puts it).

There are some other resonances for me that are fascinating.  I had already started to wonder about Ralph’s love of language and facility for making up stories and telling lies to get out of trouble.  There are also several references to Laurie thinking he is just making things up about himself to please him!  I wondered about the idea of fiction being a ‘forbidden thing’ in a religious household, and was amazed to discover that Edmund Gosse’s mother believed fiction a ‘sin’ and kept it out of the house – he did not have access to literature for much of his childhood.  I sometimes feel that Ralph might have discovered the joys of telling stories relatively late, and relished their power.

Another thing that fascinates me about the Plymouth Brethren is that they are essentially rebellious – they were formed in defiance of organised religion.  So Ralph’s mother grew up in a ‘rebellious household’ but was indoctrinated with ideas from a young age that she couldn’t properly articulate.  Then she ‘rebelled’ on some level.  For me this ties in with that very contradictory aspect of Ralph, that he is desperate to be part of a community, but he also makes up his own rules.

And related to this, bible-study is the key – PB do not accept intermediaries telling them what to believe.  Gosse describes the way his parents spent hours discussing biblical texts together.  I feel Ralph did this as a child, and when he discovered the Phaedrus, I imagine him reading it with the same fervour, poring over every word looking for a moral code he could live by – working up what he was into a religion.

I just checked that bit again about ‘good women’ and found this: “Suddenly he seemed to remember the text of his earlier sermon” Wow!  Ralph is sermonising, but now he has found a new religion!  PB were big on converting people and in ‘Father and Son’, Gosse refers to being expected to ask strangers he meets if they are saved.  Hitherto I have felt that Ralph is in ‘Head boy’ mode or ‘school debate’ mode when he is arguing so forcefully with Laurie.  But now I am seeing a passionate and fervent preacher.  He is a proselytiser all right.  Perhaps Mary wanted to give one of her most attractive and powerful characters a bit of religious fervour when stating his cause.  After all, why should religious people have the monopoly on the right to be a decent human being?

[awakened-human-design]

Stop! Don’t Make this Mistake

You are not a “type” or a “sign.” You are the *totality* and *wholeness* of your genetic blueprint that is *unique* only to YOU. 

1 / Human Design is *not* a “personality” test. 

In fact, it’s quite the opposite!

A “personality” test looks at who we are when certain conditions show up, i.e. “when my boss tells me to do something at work, I do x,y, or z.” Ew! No thanks.

We have been conditioned to act a certain way to fit into in a homogenized world. At a certain level we need this, to survive and adapt to the conditions of living, and it can serve to protect the more vulnerable parts of our Self has we go through our development.

But it’s NOT our *design*

It’s not our *Self*

The *design* or *Self* side of the Bodygraph represents our *bodily* knowing. At first it is unconscious, and is longing to be brought to the surface and fully lived.

It is who we are when our body does the talking. Not “body language” in a way to become more powerful or communicate something at a business conference, but emBodied language, as an emBryo snuggled into the the story a greater whole.  

And yes, there are four *types,* but no two *types* look the same. Each design contains multitudes of uniqueness that is *precise* and precious to the story of WHO YOU REALLY ARE. 

2 / Human design is *not* the same as astrology. 

Look, I’m an huge astrology nerd but I’m grateful we have a better tool now that’s been developed since the 1990s with language and archetypes that are based on the emerging future, and not a fallen Roman Empire. 

For two reasons. First, HD does work with the cross of fate/destiny in our individual journeys, AND ALSO gives space for the *mutation* and *evolution* of the individual within the story of the entire *Kosmos.* 

A caterpillar coming out of a cocoon has no idea it’s fated to be a butterfly. Astrology can point us to this type of fate. Which is cool.

A caterpillar practicing Human Design, however, can choose the colors of her future wings, how far she will fly, and what other creatures will fly and evolve alongside her. 

By living as your design, part of *the program* that is, the program that is running *throughout space AND time* is changed because you are living correctly. 

Look, it’s not just saying “I am a Leo” and you get to be a lion in someone else’s meme dream. You actually get to evolve the face of the lion looks like and the sound of his roar for future generations.

The more your life as yourself - the more you become an image and face of a ‘God’ that *no one* has seen before - that’s how intensely and insanely unique each individual design can be lived. 

Why is this? Because in Human Design we are working with an element called “Authority.” No, we are not talking about “Authority” when it comes to the trauma you need to resolve around mom and dad, the police, the government, the people who tell you to go “get a job,” whoever else is your boss yadda yadda (Which we might need to do as well, but that’s not “Authority” according to this system)

We are talking about *inner* authority, the very thing that guides us to take action in the space between mind and body. We could sit around all day and be a body. We could meditate all day and be a mind. But it’s when we realize that every human action is sacred AND transcendent, that we begin to awaken to our Authority and Design.

When we practice HD, our *inner* Authority becomes *externalized.*

Now we are making decisions from our voice/gut-brain/sacral/heart/soul/voice, etc. Traditional un-merited branches of “authority” make decisions from the mind, not the body, and thus have produced the fears that so many of us feel “up against.” 

But you have to actually practice using your Authority, in the day to day world, by locating it IN and AS the body, and then really practice, I’m talking 3 to 7 years, to get that to be externalized. 

YOU already know these things! But are you ready to externalize to become an *exemplar* of embodiment to the hungry, hurting world?

I call my business *Awakened* Human Design, because the system is so new, and there there are not many of us out there living this story in it’s *full-force.*

You can find a million Human Design coaches in a simple search, who will help you to get a better job or something. But I’m not here to do that. I’m here to make you come alive and awake as yourself.

Having knowledge of HD and living in it and as it are two different things. There aren’t that many people on the planet actually living a life of *awakened* Design down to the itty bitty cells in their body. This is the transmission I can offer. 

[jonfarreporter]

Sausalito Center for the Arts hosts 2nd annual Figurative Art exhibit

One of the most beautiful and personal – yet surprisingly – still controversial expressions of art – is the human form.

The body has been a subject of art since humanity’s very first attempts at artistic expression.

Opening on January 8, Sausalito Center for the Arts (SCA) will host their second annual figurative art exhibit entitled, “Here/Now: The Bay Area Figurative Movement Grows.”

The exhibit’s curators Susan R. Kirshenbaum and Catherine Merrill took a few moments to speak about the significance of the exhibit and its meaning.

In correlation with previous figurative art exhibits, especially in the San Francisco Bay Area, Kirshenbaum noted.

“Today’s narrative, expressive phase of the Bay Area figurative movement is about reflecting on the world we live in. (Hence this year’s exhibit title ‘Here/Now…’)”

“We are telling stories that reach beyond academic achievement and accuracy,” (especially in the traditional and classical sense) said Kirshenbaum.

“We are truth seeking,” said Kirshenbaum. “Sometimes we embrace the un-beautiful,” she said. “Or create beauty for its own sake.”

“Our work as artists might reflect our personal struggles or the tensions that surround our lives,” said Kirshenbaum.

“We are presenting a range of 25 selected artists, she said, who focus on the figure. These artists all live and work in The Bay Area.”

“Each is grounded in the figurative movement,” she said. “Yet, each of them continues to explore and express their humanity through portrayals of the figurative form in context.”

Speaking from her own perspective and experience, sculptor Catherine Merrill was eager to point out.

“This exhibit affirms the figurative art of the past. But like all art, the artist is expressing the feelings, thoughts and ideas of the world the artist lives in.”

“The 25 artists we have gathered for this year’s exhibit, said Merrill, are some of the most talented in The Bay, and what they express is relevant to today.”

Despite what goes on in the world, as Merrill exclaimed, “the creative process is a cause for joy; even amid the most challenging and difficult of times.”

Merrill is obviously deeply concerned about our lives today as she said.

“Art is about connecting; connecting with the physical world and with people.”

In addition to Merrill’s background as a dancer and being involved with live performance before becoming a full-time sculpture artist, “I was very much formed by the 1960s,” she said.

The Civil Rights Movement, the Women’s Liberation Movement, the Peace Movement, The Free Speech Movement as well as the Environmental Movement all occurred within Merrill’s lifetime and generation.

“I am concerned that as an American society we are losing our footing and are failing backwards.”

“For me the arts, especially sculpture, is all about the physical, tangible, tactile world.” Merrill said.

She mentioned neurologist Frank R. Wilson’s 1998 book, “The Hand: How its use shapes the brain, language & human culture.”

“I agree with Wilson that when we use our hands, create things, build things with our own hands, our brains improve and grow.”

Noticing the various trends that contemporary culture and tech culture has influenced, Merrill said.

“Working with one’s hands leads to discovering the world in a very specific tactile way.”

“Most of us don’t rely wholly on photographic reference material, said Kirshenbaum, and instead we carefully observe and interpret our life models, conveying our shared stories through our artistic interpretations.”

“It seems that today’s contemporary art culture is pre-occupied with following trends,” said Merrill.

For example, Merrill said. “I think it’s important to recycle.” “But I don’t want to do art about recycling.”

“Again, reiterated Merrill, art is about working with one’s hands; and it’s about connecting with the world and with people.”

In addition to co-curating the exhibit with Kirshenbaum, Merrill will be showing four large wall sculptures.

Each one is eye-catching, not only with a vivid sense of color and texture, but each one has a human figure central to the composition.

To emphasize the importance of connectedness, the piece entitled “Brothers” reflects Merrill’s belief that humanity and the plant world are truly linked as one.

The robust naked man leaning next to the tree has literally become at-one with the tree. His masculine physique reflects the beauty and strength of the tree.

“Think about it for a moment, if it wasn’t for trees and plants, humans couldn’t breathe,” said Merrill.

In addition to sculpture, the “Here/Now” exhibit also features life drawing.

Kirshenbaum will be exhibiting a piece of her work in The Drawing Group portion of the show, and she said. “The exhibit pays tribute to life drawing groups everywhere.”

About ‘The Drawing Group’ at the upcoming exhibit, Kirshenbaum said.

“We are bringing awareness to the subculture of drawing groups everywhere which continue to grow and maintain a large following of dedicated artists well beyond art school.”

Explaining further Kirshenbaum noted. “Our group is made up of artists who have been meeting for over 30 years, led by the San Francisco painter John Goodman.”

“We meet weekly at John’s Box Factory Loft studio in The Mission District of San Francisco,” said Kirshenbaum.

“John describes it, noted Kirshenbaum, as ‘a weekly fellowship of smart, talented and congenial people'. Each dealing with the ‘why’ and sometimes ‘how’ they draw.’”

“Each artist in the group shares the cost of hiring live models as well as some snacks and beverages to fuel the process of the group.”

“The poses, the shapes, gestural movements, opportunities of inspiration and spontaneity emerge on paper. One artist describes the process as a ‘synthesis’ of layers of drawn images in the hands of an artist.”

Using technology to help in making or enhancing art is okay. But it’s relying entirely upon technology without the tangible, tactile experience of the physical world that is of concern to both Merrill and Kirshenbaum.

“Use of live models is crucial,” said Merrill. “Their presence is tangible, creating a real, honest-to-goodness essence, interacting in a room with the artists,” she added.

Stephen Namara is one artist who is featured in the exhibit. He employs various drawing techniques in his distinctive style of figurative art.

Since the 1970s, Namara has been an important contributor in The Bay Area figure artist’s community.

Described by independent-artist and curator Karen M. Gutfreund as “exquisite” and “masterfully drawn” Namara’s work continues to inspire.

Gutfreund is affiliated with several groups including the Northern California Women’s Caucus for Art.

This ambitious showing of diverse, multi-generational artists, using a wide variety of materials to create their work, are likely to inspire fellow artists, patrons, and viewers alike.

The exhibiting artists are:

Joseph Abbati

Doug Andelin

Isidoro Angeles

Adam Caldwell

Sandy Frank

Tebby George

Mary Graham

Susan R. Kirshenbaum

Calvin Lai

Kim Larson

Catherine Merrill

Stephen Namara

Diane Olivier

May Shei

Sandra Speidel

The Drawing Group:

Dwight Been, Henry Bridges, Daisy Eneix, John Goodman, Susan R. Kirshenbaum, Pamela Mooney, Alex Rosmarin, Peter Steinhart, Barbara Tonnesen, and Dieter Tremp.

Opening on January 8 “Here/Now: The Bay Area Figurative Movement Grows,” is to be held at Sausalito Center for the Arts, 750 Bridgeway at (Anchor St.), the month-long exhibit will continue until Feb 2, 2025.

An Opening Reception with live music and refreshments will be held on Jan. 11 from 3-6pm.

For more details regarding lectures, talks and events planned during the exhibit, visit the Sausalito Center for the Arts (SCA) website.

[mediocrestoryteller]

First Post

If you spent any time on the internet in late 2023, you may be familiar with the uncanny valley. On social media, it was mostly just people with makeup on that made them look un-human. Not like someone who made themself look like a robot, but someone who looked too human. It was unsettling because, as humans, we expect other humans to look a certain way. Eyes this far apart, a nose this size, lips this big. These expected traits vary from person to person of course, but slight variations from what we think people are supposed to look puts us on edge. The same applies to humanoid robots, of course, but what makes them uncanny is different. The way they talk, walk, and look all contribute to their uncanniness.

Why is this? In short, we don’t know. Simple as that, some things just put us off. The longer answer is also pretty simple, evolution. In 1970, a Japanese roboticist published a paper outlining the basis for the uncanny valley, people would have less excitement towards robots as they became more human, making people uncomfortable. But it doesn’t explain why this would be the case. That came in late 2023, when the makeup trend began. People theorized why it made them so uncomfortable. The masses came to a consensus, obviously this feeling helped humanities development in some way, but they didn’t agree on how. There are two schools of thought; one is that “the uncanny valley effect” developed to help identify the sick and dead. The physical changes that occur during illness and death make someone appear less human somehow. The other is far more disturbing than a simple tactic to identify sick and dead humans.

We like to think of ourselves as the top of the food chain. There are very few animals that can take down a fully grown human. In the Stone Age, people would run their prey to exhaustion. Our ability to sweat meant that humans were better able to regulate body temperature and a fit human can run much longer than their prey before exhaustion. Add complex weapons and strategizing to our unique evolutionary traits and you have an apex predator. A being capable of running down mammoths that advanced rapidly and domesticated animals before the written word. What could possibly hunt them? And with the amount of infighting humans do, why would anything need to? To avoid predation, animals have physical traits to ward off predators. Some mimic plants, others mimic other poisonous creatures, and some develop false eyes to trick a predator into thinking it’s been seen. If humans had any predators, why didn’t we develop venom or some form of camouflage. What if our protection went deeper? What if it was hardwired into our brains?

Think about it. Rodents instinctively know that birds and cats hunt them. Snakes also know birds hunt them. This isn’t something they learn from their parents. They don’t learn from seeing others of their species eaten. They just know. They know they need to run or fight, to hide from or kill the predator hunting them. It’s called the fight or flight response. Every living being has it. Adrenaline courses through the body and the brain makes a decision. Fight or flight. Stand your ground, or run. Some are inclined to run, others to fight. It’s a primal survival instinct, but obviously it serves a purpose. Humanity made it to the twenty-first century with this instinct intact, if not flawed. Some people are always in fight or flight mode, anxiety it’s called, and some have a diminished sense of danger, daredevils and thrill seekers. 

Think harder now. Why would humans need the uncanny valley if we already have a nearly perfect defense mechanism? I said “nearly” just now. Did you notice? “Nearly perfect”. See, fight or flight doesn’t alert us to threats, it’s just the response. We rely on body language to identify threats. A snarling wolf, a gorilla with bared teeth, a snake baring its fangs. We know these are signs of an aggressive animal. We know to avoid them. A shady person in your neighborhood triggers your fight or flight response the same way an outwardly aggressive person would. That’s how important body language is.

Now imagine. You encounter a woman on your way to work. She seems fairly normal, but something is off. Maybe it’s the way she walks, far too stiff for any normal person. Maybe she’s on the phone and her tone doesn’t match what she’s saying. She’s announcing the death of a family member or friend too excitedly. Or maybe it’s her face. Her eyes or nose aren’t right, she’s smiling too broadly, broader than any person should be able too. Whatever it is, it’s wrong. Something about this woman isn’t right. Then, without realizing, you’re running. You don’t know why, but you need to get someplace safe now. This isn’t right and you need to get away from that woman. Right now. You run all the way to work and lock yourself in the bathroom. Maybe the woman didn’t follow you. You take a moment to collect yourself, clock in, and go about your day, looking out the windows and glancing over your shoulder.

It didn’t follow you. It knew you saw through its disguise and decided you weren’t worth the effort. It continued with its day, waiting for someone less observant than you. Someone who wouldn’t run or fight.

That’s what the uncanny valley is for. That’s the predator that hunts the apex predator. They blend in with humans so well, we had to develop a sort of sixth sense to protect ourselves. A predator that lives among its prey, waiting for the moment to strike. It makes you wonder. How close did humanity come to extinction before we developed our sixth sense?

[kiss-my-freckle]

This is what Julie said in an interview few days after 3x22. I found what she said about Delena interesting since after 3x17 aired she was asked why Elena was more mad at Damon than at Stefan over Stefan feeding on humans and said people always get the most mad at those they care about most. I don't think Elena was in love with Stefan in 3x22:

"Though she has obviously grown to love Damon, and probably be in love with Damon, over the course of three seasons, what she said was 100 percent true: Even at its worst, she never fell out of love with Stefan, and you just can't let somebody like that go. So letting Damon go was the right thing to do for her.

"There's some new information that will be introduced to Elena in the first episode of next season. I think it's just all part of the ongoing friendship and romantic entanglement that Elena has with Damon. She's never gonna be able to shake it completely, and new information is only gonna get under her skin and embed itself into her even more. And so, it will cause complications with Stefan, of course. But she's committed to Stefan. She loves Stefan. We'll get to actually see them be together for a little while.

About Klaroline:

So what happens with them next season? What will Caroline be thinking?

The first thing she'll be is fairly shocked, and stunned, and probably borderline ecstatic, but also very confused when she realizes that presumably Tyler will live to see the other end of the story. And then she's going to be, excuse my language, f—ing pissed at Klaus, who is doing some and will continue to do some subterfuge as far as who he's pretending to be inside of Tyler's body. [Laughs] We'll see how much play he gets out of that.

I consider 3x5 to be Elena's un-fall. She wasn't in love with Stefan after that, but loving him as a friend. I was commenting on a post not long ago about the writing of the show. 4x6 implies that Damon was Elena's true choice in 3x22. What they pull in 6x13 is insanely beautiful because I love Elena's speech and I love every bit of what it means. In that episode, they imply that Elena chose death over Damon, so they actually put Damon and Elena in parallel with Tyler and Liv. Stefan wasn't even an option in 3x22. He was only an option because he was home with Tyler and Caroline. I will say this much.... it's important for fans to view 3x22 in two parts: 1. Who is Elena's choice before Alaric stakes Klaus? 2. Who is Elena's choice after Alaric stakes Klaus?

When fans consider those two parts, they'll understand why I believe Elena lied to both brothers. She lied to Damon in 3x22, then lied to Stefan in 4x1.

I don't bother with what writers say in interview because what they say in interview never coincides with what they've shown on screen. Writer interviews are only good for fans wanting smoke blown up their ass. I honestly feel bad for this fandom because they're stuck with writers who aim to please both ships. If half the shit they claim in interview were true, the fans would've seen it for themselves just by watching the show. They don't see it because it's not there, and it's not there because the writers are trying to please both shipper bases.